#content warning: implied/referenced suicide

[lostcauses-noregrets]

Lostcauses Fic: Sealskin [Podfic]

Erwin's sketch book by @seitsen-sarvi.

Erwin is an environmental scientist, a driven man on a mission to save the world. His research does not normally involve fieldwork, and it certainly does not normally involve spending six months of the year at the university’s field station on a remote island in the North Atlantic, with only seals for company. But the solitude of the island and a chance encounter with a curious stranger bring a profound revelation.

A podfic written and read by LostCauses, loosely based on Maurice Lindsay's 1946 short story Sealskin Trousers.

Listen and download at eruri.org/sealskin.

With enormous thanks to @seitsen-sarvi for the beautiful art and @momtaku for whatever the audio equivalent of beta is ♡

[futuremrscameron]

❀˖°bahamian!reader❀˖°

content warnings: suicidal ideation, (accidental) shooting, symptoms of mental illness, hints of dom/sub dynamic, referenced sexual content, implied/referenced violence, major spoilers for outer banks s1-3, hints of rafebarryoc

bahamian!reader and rafe met in the bahamas. after shooting sarah and behaving his worries dismissed by ward, rafe found himself standing at the shoreline contemplating ending it all when a voice called out to him. he thought she was an angel at first but no angel would call him "bey"

he whips his head around to find the voice. it’s an angel?

"what the hell were you doing?" her thick accent catches him off guard. he rationalizes it though, angels are theoretically from all over and he is in bahamas, so if he died there then that would make sense

“ay? ya hear me man?”

he looks around for anyone else and points at himself?

“ya see anyone else in the water?”

he shakes his head. she chuckles and it’s the prettiest sound he’s ever heard.

“are you an angel?”

she smirks, “angel? never heard that one before. no man, i’m just a gal.” she chuckles as she makes her way down the sandhill.

“am i dead?”

she frowns as she closes the distance between them. “if i ain’t an angel how are you dead?”

he blushes, embarrassed at the stupid thought but intrigued by the woman.

“it’s okay. so?”

“so?”

“wanna get out of the water?”

oh right. he is in the water. he didn’t get too far before she came, the waves come up to his hips.

“sure.” he pushes past the current to reach the beauty on land.

three hours later

“your ole’man sounds like shit.”

“yeah.”

“well.”

“well?”

“what ya gon’ do?”

“i don’t know.”

“well, how long you here for?”

he squints, “why?”

she shrugs, looking down at their hands side by side, “can help ya figure it out. and,” she connects their fingers and meets his eyes. “you’re cute.” she smiles.

bahamian!reader is the oldest of five siblings so she can somewhat relate to rafe’s struggles

bahamian!reader who owns a bar that sits on a dock near the same beach she met rafe at

bahamian!reader and rafe long distance dating after she refuses to go back to obx with him.

“what do you mean you can’t?”

“what part of i cant is confusin’?” she rolls her eyes, she loves the boy but his emotional maturity and poor communication skills leaves much to be desired.

“i got family. little ones who rely on me.”

“i could take care of you.”

“i know and i love that about you but… i gatte do this on my own.”

he gets out because he understands what it’s like to want to prove yourself and be the hero/savior.

“i’ll call you every day ey?”

he nods. that won’t do. she softly but firmly grips his chin, making him meet her eyes. “ah, use your words.”

he lets out a soft, “okay.”

a grin blooms on her face, “good boy.”

bahamian!reader who the pogues (mostly jj) do not believe exists. rafe shows her off to to kelce and topper at the country club and jj sees her over his shoulder while working

“no way she’s real.” rafe doesn’t look back as he flicks off the boy.

“fuck off pogue.”

jj smirks, knowing he got under the kook king’s skin with his comment. he leans against the wall behind them. “next thing you know you’re gonna tell me she’s from canada.”

rafe nearly knocks the table over as he bolts up from his chair. he reaches the blonde boy in two strides, holding his collar in his hands. “you wanna keep this job and your teeth i suggest you mind your business and get our fucking order down.

bahamian!reader who answers rafe’s calls all the time no matter what she’s doing

“how could she do this? i mean we’re her family!” rafe paces back and forth in his room as he rants into his phone.

she holds her flip phone between her neck and ear while she washes the remaining dishes from the last couple of guests. “rafe, you tried to kill her.”

“oh so you’re on her side.”

she slams her fist down against the counter, “don’t start rafe. i’m not in the mood ey?”

bahamian!reader who meets up with rafe in guadeloupe. she missed rafe so when he told her about ward’s plan to move after acquiring the cross she knew it was the perfect opportunity

she wanted to surprise him, it’s why she didn’t tell him about her plan to hop on a plane and meet him in guadeloupe. it was hard to act like she was too busy to facetime but the look on his face when she surprised him at his home was worth it.

“ray!” he turns around at the familiar melodic voice and is tackled with a hug.

he looks up at the woman hovering above him, grinning down at him like he’s hung the stars in the sky. his chest feels warm, it’s a good feeling, he never wants to let her go.

“you’re here.” he cradles her face in his hand, he pulls back like he’s been burned when he makes contact with flesh.

she frowns, “wouldn’t pass up the chance to see you bey! not when you’re so close.”

she closes the distance with a kiss, he’s surprised at first but reciprocates almost immediately. he wraps his arms around her waist as she moans into the kiss.

“rafe!?”

the couple parts at rose’s interruption. she looks at rafe, at the mystery girl, and back at rafe. “who’s this?”

rafe sighs, “we’ve got a lot to discuss.”

bahamian!reader and rafe who spend all their time in guadeloupe in bed

she traces circles on rafe’s chest as the overhead fan does its best to cool the couple down. it’s no use, they’re sweat like pigs in a blanket. from their strenuous exercise. a very expensive blanket. she breaks the silence first, “ya know some fresh air wouldn’t kill ya.”

rafe looks down at her with a raised brow, “yeah?”

she pouts, “you don’t agree.”

she tries to hide it but he sees her. he immediately tries to soften the blow, “i didn’t say that, i just… we’ve only got so much time together.”

“yeah and i don’t wanna spend it all inside.”

he smirks at her soft tone and pouting, its not often he gets to see the usually bold woman like this. “you weren’t complaining thirty minutes ago.”

“mmhm you just want me to yourself.” she stretches her arms above her head, the sheets fall showing off her figure.

rafe grips her thigh, “can you blame me?”

she throws her legs over his hips and smiles down at him, “no.”

the pair spend the rest of the day inside.

bahamian!reader who is very strict and it’s her coworkers and only soft with her

“rafe i told you not to call me when i’m working.”

“i miss you.”

she instantly melts upon hearing the desperation in his voice, “awww i miss you too. how’s my baby doing?”

bar patrons and employees alike stare in shock and confusion as they watch her speak softly to someone other than her siblings. they all agree to find out who this mystery man is and why he has this affect on her.

bahamian!reader who gets along well with barry despite rafe trying to keep the two apart because they represent conflicting parts of his life (he’s jealous)

“barry!” she all but hops out the passenger seat as the car comes to a stop in front of barry’s trailer.

“there’s my girl.” she runs to the man and throws her arms around him. he spins her around, once, twice. too many times for rafe’s liking. she giggles.

“yo keep your hands where i can see them.” the pair turn to face rafe who slams the car door shut behind him.

“me or barry?”

“yes.”

barry rolls his eyes and looks down at the woman in his arms, “he in a mood?”

“ey, its awful, cried all the way here.”

barry smirks, “our boy don’t know how to act.” she shakes her head in faux disappointment, “at all at all.”

“i can hear you!”

bahamian!reader splits her time equally between the bahamas and obx

“i can’t believe you’re leaving me.” rafe sits on his bed watching her pack her suitcase.

she rolls her eyes, “hey! none of that ya hear. you had me for the summer now i got to go back to the chirren.”

he wraps his arms around her slowly kissing her neck, erasing the little sense she has left. “the oldest is sixteen baby, they can look after themselves for a little longer.”

“rafe.” she groans.

the kisses grow more frequent and feverish, “come on. one more week.”

she knows she shouldn’t but he’s so persuasive. she looks back at him, who can say no to those baby blue eyes.

“fine.”

he grins and kisses her face, she giggles at the feverish but silly flurry of kisses.

bahamian!reader says “i love you” first which shocks herself and rafe

bahamian!reader who really likes rafe but refuses to go any further until she gains the approval of her siblings

rafe is not the gretest with kids. he couldn’t even watch his seven year old sister at ten because he was “untrustworthy” and “immature” (that part never made sense to him he was ten for fuck sake). he knew he wasn’t number one on the ‘trustworthy adult to watch kids’ list, its why he knew something was up when rose left wheelie in his care.

all that to say he was sure he was gonna fuck up the first meeting he had with her siblings. “what if they hate me?” he looks at his reflection.

she looks up from her magazine, “they won’t.”

rafe nods but still doesn’t meet her eyes. he fiddles with the family ring before asking, “what if they do?”

she manages to catch his eyes this time, her cold smile sends shivers down his spine. “then i’ll dump you.”

he frowns, “not funny.”

she shrugs, “not jokin’.”

“great motivation. seriously you should do ted talks.” she leans up and kisses his forehead, “you’ll do great.”

he does great. especially after he realizes that their deep questions and calculating stares are there to made sure he doesn’t hurt their sister. he can respect that. he would do the same.

bahamian!reader who wants to have a family with rafe and is ecstatic when she sees those two pink lines

[redfoxwritesstuff]

Posting schedule: Friday Misdemeanor, and Wednesdays for one the occasional one shot. Tag lists are always open. 

Join us in the VoxTek Discord server for a Vox themed Hazbin place to hang and get teasers for upcoming chapters! 

my AO3 and Kofi

A Misdemeanor Of The Heart 

Cover done by @redvexillum

Human Alastor x married reader Rated Adult for adult themes,triggering content and sexual content. Potentially DD:DNE, mind the warnings Series Trigger Warnings: Adultery, stalking, Sexual assault, Rape, smut, Domestic Violence, Time period accurate views on women and domestic violence and skin color, murder

Summary: Fading away in an abusive marriage, each day passes just the same as the last. Painful monotony eats at you until a pair of warm brown eyes sparks the idea that you could have something more. When a business deal between men sparks a torrid affair, how long can you keep things going before the fire either leaves you a burnt out shell or burns up everything around you?

And what becomes of the radio host who thought he was above the fickle fires of the heart when the match he strikes burns his hand instead? Can he possess what rightfully belongs to another man without leaving everything he has fought for in ashes?

Chapter 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59. 60

MisD Sidepieces: One shots or fics that take place in a MisD AU or are MisD canon but written by another.

Inappropriate Demeanor by @nyx-umbrakinesis (Canon placement, end of chapter 22)

Audio Chapters by Nyx Productions: Chapter 1: part 1 part 2, Chapter 2:  Part 1, part 2, part 3, chapter 3, Part 1, part 2, part 3, Chapter 4: Part 1, Part 2,  Chapter 5: Part 1, Part 2, Chapter 6: Part 1, Part 2

For Eternity (Completed)

Banner by @redvexillum

Alastor x Angel!Wife Oc (Isabel) Rated: Adult Warnings: This fic contains sexual content, explorations of consent within Angel Dust's contract in relation to sex work, Sexual assault, Possessive and obsessive behaviors, Power dynamics, Adam being an ass, kidnapping, Vox is in hell for a reason, Val is in hell for a reason, Vox has a weird thing for Alastor, Angel Dust is sweet as pie, murder, revenge, implied sexual assault and harassment, miscarriage and death.

Summary: Isabel died young, leaving behind her husband to pick up the pieces. Finding herself in Heaven, she waits for her husband to join her. And waits. And waits. Years and decades pass as she faces the realization that Alastor may not be joining her in Heaven, leaving her largely alone in a realm of double standards and fake smiles.

She must decide if she is going to move on from her marriage or do whatever it takes to reunite with her husband. Would he even still want her? Would she survive the dangers to find him? Would the cost be worth what could be gained?

Is Heaven really Heaven if the one you love isn't there with you?

Chapter 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13

Another day in Paradise (On hiatus)

Pairing: Eventually Alastor x OFC, later- light Alastor x ofc x Lucifer Rated: Adult for eventual smut Content warnings: It's Hazbin Hotel- this feels redundant. Sex, eventual smut, referenced implied suicide to be discussed in more detail later, drugs, drinking, poor coping, toxic behavior, controlling behavior, cannibalism, idk, it's fucking Hazbin Hotel, if it's worth a content warning it's probably going to come up at some point? Religious trauma. reader has a name/is a oc.

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4

A Taste of Sugar

Alastor x reader Rated: Adult for smut TW: blood kink, bondage, reader with trauma from food insecurity Summary: As you work through the trauma of your life and starving to death, you dismantle your stash of snacks for what you hope will be the final time. Snack cakes, cookies and crackers are given to everyone around you, except one resident in the hotel whom you knew wouldn't enjoy or consume the treats. Then, as the flow of treats tricked to a stop, stash dismantled, small brown boxes containing treats began to appear at your door. Simple, delicious and seemingly homemade treats without so much as a note.

He watched and he waited, each week for your offer. Each week, no offer came and again he left his gift at your door. Why would you not think of him? Why would you not see him? What did he have to do for you to consider him?

Chapters: 1,  2 

Wild Flowers (One shot)

Alastor x readerRated: Adult, 18+ Content warnings: Sex pollen trope and related questionable consent due to intoxication, oral (f receiving), multiple orgasms, knotting, praise, dancing that shouldn't be that sexy, biting, a touch of blood drinking, female masterbation, some possessiveness, Alastor being a bit of an ass

Summary: You had always loved flowers, so when you found a patch of pretty purple wildflowers growing in the small forest behind the hotel, you didn't think twice about picking a small handful to bring back to your room. While they smelled lovely, you were wholly unprepared for the side effects of exposure or the repercussions of offering the terrifyingly handsome Radio Demon a smell on your way to your room.

With your body burning from the inside out with an overwhelming need and a displeased Radio Demon pushing his way into your room, you have no idea what you're in for.

All you wanted was to pick some flowers but you got so much more.

Audio version brought to you by @nyx-umbrakinesis,  Pt1, Pt2, Pt3, Pt4, Pt5, Pt6.

Steamy Situations 18+  (One shot)

Alastor x readerRated: Adults only Warnings: Smut. It's shower smut. Female bodied reader. Careful with your shower sex.

Summary: You're hot and bored and your husband is busy working. If only there was a way you could distract him, get some of his attention and cool off. Audio Fic credits: Read by the lovely @nyx-umbrakinesis (Audio fic part 1, part 2)

Read me to sleep? (One shot)

Alastor x readerRating: G Summary: After a long, shitty day out and about you drag yourself home to the hotel to seek shelter and comfort in the one place you knew you could find it.

Home is where the heart is (One shot fluff) 

Vox x Reader Rated: General Warnings: I accidently spilled a little angst on the fluff serving. Sorry?

Summary: You're cooking dinner when your secret boyfriend comes home. Caught up in the moment, confessions are made and hearts are put on the line.

A Bed of Electric FLowers (One Shot)

Header done in part by the wonderful, amazing, fantastical @redvexillum

Vox x ReaderRated: Adult CW: Sex pollen trope, sex toy use, female masterbation, Vox's glowstick dick, way too many tv details, Male receiving oral,

Summary: A unexpected floral arrangement is delivered to your door as you're trying to ignore the lingering absence of your flat faced boyfriend. When Vox returns home and finds you in a compromising position, he's eager to assist even without a clue as to what has you so worked up.

Sister Dearest (One shot)

Requested: Vox x Alastor’s!Sister!Reader rated: Adult

Summary: Sneaking out of the protection of the protection of your brother's district was dangerous. Not only did you risk Alastor's wrath, you risked catching the eye of some unsavory characters. While you could meet many friends upon the streets of the forbidden tech district, you find Vox and his alluring promises of a good time.He knew of your brother and seemed to hold no animosity, surely he was a friend to the Radio Demon, right? Surely you could trust his company, right?Right?

Power (One Shot)

Vox x Reader Rating: Explicit 18+ Warnings: Porn without plot, Power dynamics, Secretary reader, Choking on dick, Office blowjob. 

Summary: Vox is wound tight after his on air showdown with the newly returned Alastor. The show must go on though and you have just what he needs to get into the right headspace to move forward. 

(None, for now)

(None, for now)

[cybsoo2]

closer

╰┈➤ synopsis — Your relationship is on the rocks. The tide sweeps you away and leaves your love out to dry. As the final wave of realization washes over you, you try to run away. Taehyung can't take it anymore and reaches his breaking point. The only way to keep you, is to cut you close.

╰┈➤ pairing — yandere!taehyung x reader

╰┈➤ word count — 2.4k

╰┈➤ content warning — yandere behavior, self-harm, implied/referenced suicide, suicide attempt, threats, toxic!relationship, munchausen syndrome, angst

Your life is out of love. Taehyung took everything from you. Your youth, your energy, and all your attention. You've given him everything your heart has to offer. But all this fear & fighting has bleed you to the bone. If you let yourself live like this for even a minute more, you have no doubt that the fire inside of you will run dry. Its flames snuffed out by Taehyung’s suffocating sickness.

You were once a careless couple, so raw with romance. But time turnt its ugly head and what were once happy memories became nighttime nostalgia. Your relationship began to decay at the very first appearance of Taehyung’s disease. His obsession was slow and steady like the sea. It rolled up in waves. At first he began to act more clingy, hesitant to let you leave his hold. Then the second wave came in, he grew jealous of your friends and family. The third wave drew in suspicion, but by then you were already swept up by the tide. 

You’ve become so entangled in his toxic touch, that you doubt your soul will ever be set free. And although the risk is high and will result in heartbreak, you can’t help but chase after the reward. To live a free life again, away from the sickness that Taehyung spreads. This time apart may even begin to slowly heal his heart. So you’ve decided that when dawn falls, you’ll run away from all this heartache. Leaving the love of your life only out of hope for a better future. A healthy and heartfelt one that you both deserve, even if it isn’t what he wants. 

Taehyung finds out he lost your love through a letter. He had never meant to stumble upon the scripted confession, it was purely an accident. Stuffed away behind the bookshelf and only to be revealed by a burst of air. The gust of wind carried the paper up into the air and falling at Taehyung’s feet.

He's hesitant to pick up the paper, his insecurities already beginning to eat away at his mind. Why was the letter hidden away from him? What secretive thoughts did you not want to tell him? He's already assuming the worst.

His hands shake as he picks up the lonely letter. The words are rushed and bleed into one another. His blurry vision makes it hard to read, but he manages to catch the common words:

Tired. Suffocated. Can't. Hurts. Falling out of lo–

He can't read anymore. His tears are falling too fast and so is his heart. It sinks to the bottom of his stomach. An empty pit replaces it and he feels as if he might puke. He can already taste the metallic tang in his mouth. 

How could he have been so stupid? Of course you’d never love him like he loves you. A love so strong that it spread like a sickness. Swallowing him whole and now he’s dying of this disease. And instead of staying by his side, you’re running away. 

It’s all your fault. You stole his heart and now he can’t escape. He fell in love so fast it left him unsteady. Insecurities overflowing and questions consuming him. So many fears fester under the skin. Their whispers are warped reality, making him second guess everything he has with you. 

You stayed late at work last week, are you cheating on him? You said you had to study and aren’t paying him any attention, do you even care about him? You say you love him, but is it all a lie? 

Taehyung can’t tell what's real or not. His love sickness has spread to his mind, making him act irrational. He feels so confused and overwhelmed with emotions. The only time he can tell what’s true, is when it’s all red. 

Your pain is his passion. Because when he’s bleeding out right before you, you finally show him how much you care. Cradling him in your arms, pressing hasty kisses to the top of his head. His heart feels full and he can finally see clearly. He has no other option, he’ll die if he doesn’t have you. 

He makes his way to the bathroom where he knows you’ve kept them hidden. Those silver painkillers that sting his skin. He can hear his heartbeat ringing in his ears. He’s so, so scared. But not because of what he’s about to do, but rather because of how you’ll react. He can't stand the idea of you being upset at him. He much rather prefers your pretty tears to your angry voice. But this is just a risk he'll have to take.

He picks up his phone and pulls up the keypad. Your number is ingrained in his memory. Dialing those ten digits is as easy as breathing. How many times has he done this before? Calling you up while crying through the phone. Begging you to stay with blood on his hands. You come running back into the relationship every time. Kissing his cuts and promising you’ll love him for all eternity. And although your heart is begging to break the cycle, this time will be no different. 

“Why?”  His voice rings through the voice. 

There’s silence on your end of the line. You’re taken aback by the simple question. Taehyung sounds so… defeated. His words are so weak they barely even make their way through the phone. 

“Why don’t you love me?” 

You can hear the way his breath shakes, shallow and barely there. He tries to hide his cries behind his hand, but you can hear the way his voice begins to break. 

“You found the note didn’t you?” You let out a soft sigh. Your heart is heavy with guilt. You never wanted him to find out this way. Having this talk with him has been plaguing your mind all week. Running over the outcomes and figuring out the best way to break the news. But there’s no perfect way to do this, and when you think of how everything will end, it’s always red.

“I don’t understand–” He quickly corrects himself.  “I can’t understand. I love you. Why isn’t that enough?” He swallows down the sadness in his throat. It’s a lump that makes it hard to talk. He gets tongue tied and can barely say anything without the words breaking off. 

“Taehyung–” You try to interrupt him. Eager to end his rambling before he gets wrapped up in his own head. 

Taehyung stuffs down his sadness and it sinks to the bottom of his stomach. Acid rises and he feels as if he’s going to throw up. A burning heat slides up his throat and he’s spitting out the words before he can think twice.

“I always knew you hated me! I give you everything and it’s never enough!” Taehyung’s anger is quick to replace the anguish. His jealousy always clouding his head and covering his eyes to the truth.

“Taehyung please, can we talk about this when I get home?” His harsh words hurt your ears and tears begin to prick at your eyes. Pink-tinted and puffy, everyone around you can see your sadness on full display. Your coworkers whisper rumors to each other and their eyes stare through your skin. All the attention makes you itch, your heartbeat picking up the pace. You’re so sure that they can all hear Taehyung yelling at you through the phone. 

“No! We’re talking about this now. You never care about what I want. All you ever do is try to hurt me. I bet you wouldn’t even care if I just dropped dead.”

“Taehyung! Stop it! You know that’s not true. I do love you.” Everyone else’s eyes on you are now the least of your worries. Now only pure panic races through your veins. His emotions are beginning to eat away at his resolve, making him irritant and irrational. 

“If you really loved me you wouldn’t try to leave.”His voice is laced with betrayal. After building up a perfect image of you it’s all broken down by some flimsy little letter. 

You reach for your car keys on impulse, ready to drop everything and race back home to where Taehyung resides. Yet, you hesitate, hands stilling right before you can grab them. You made a promise to your hurting heart that you wouldn’t do this again– that you couldn’t. If you run back one more time, you’ll surely drown under the sea of his dark obsession. 

However, that doesn’t mean you want him to suffer. So you attempt to reason with the man, “That’s exactly why I’m doing this.”  You’re fighting back tears as you try to say your final goodbyes.“Taehyung…” His name hangs heavy in the air. So much emotion said in a single word. “This isn’t healthy. Not for me, and especially not for you. To be honest… I’m scared for you. Ever since we started dating you’ve only gotten worse, and I fear that it’s all my fault.” You pause for a moment, “I think we just need some time apart. Some time to focus on ourselves and get the proper help we need.”

There’s silence through the phone. The truth is a hard to swallow pill and Taehyung can’t stomach it. 

Waiting for him to respond makes your anxiety rise. Will he finally face the truth? Or will he continue to succumb to his obsession? The outcome is obvious; “You’re lying. You’re just making up excuses so you don’t have to admit how you really feel about me. Just say it already. Tell me you don’t love me.” 

Taehyung tries to justify his jealousy. Spitting out lies to lure you in. He hates hurting you– truly he does, but he’d do anything to keep you from escaping his arms. It always works out in the end, because you come running back to sooth his insecurities. 

“I love you.” You say, unwilling to lie to him even if that’s what he’s expecting.

“Then let’s test how true that is.” Taehyung tightens his grip on the silver blades. He holds the sharp edge to his bronze skin. Blood already begins to pool at the surface with how much pressure he’s applying. “How would you react if I killed myself because of you?” His tone is dead serious. Tongue so sharp it cuts through you like a knife. 

Fear paralyzes you. A cold chill crawls up your spine and sinks its teeth into your skin. Terror spreads like venom through your veins. You’re sitting still in shock, but you manage to whisper out two words, “You wouldn't”

“Come home and find out.” The line goes dead and you fear that if you’re not fast enough, he’ll be too.

As you run up the stairs to your shared apartment, you feel like you’re spiraling down to insanity. The staircase seems neverending in your race against time. You’re out of breath and breaking a sweat as you take the steps two at a time. 

After what feels like two hours of running, you collapse in front of your door. Your knees buckle before you can stop them. Your body begs you to catch your breath, but you rise up again with the last rush of adrenaline.

The door to your apartment taunts you. The bronze borders shine clearly under the moon. The little bit of light the window offers lets the door glisten like gold. But the door is stained with red paint. It chips away at the corners and overlaps the edges, almost as if it was painted in a hurry. The red door stares you down, but you build up the courage to walk right through. You already know what you’ll find when you step into the room.

Taehyung’s tears are red. He’s crying carmine and it’s staining every inch of his skin. The flesh split open with cruel cuts. They wrap around his wrists and spill scarlet onto the carpet. 

A trail of blood travels from the bathroom to the bed. You try to fit the bloody pieces back together. He must have found the razor blades under the bathroom sink. You thought you had hidden them away well enough, backed behind the towels and bottled chemicals. Taehyung could never stand the strong scent of them so he never bothered to look there. Now you realize how naive you really were. 

The drops of dark blood begin at the bathroom door. He must have cut himself in such a painful panic. The force of his frantic cuts have spilled blood onto every surface. His arteries so severely cut that they’ve sprayed onto the walls. The trail then leads to where Taehyung now lies. Dying in his own arms and surrounded by his suffering. The blood pools around his pale body while he fights to keep his eyes from closing.

The shocking sight tears a sob up out of your throat. You begin to blink back tears when you see just how much damage he’s done. You grab his limp wrists and your eyes trail over the cuts. They tear into his skin like snakes; slithering up his arms and wrapping around him. You make a move to hold him close to your heart. His head weighs heavy on your shoulder. Taehyung’s too tired to hold himself up. Fighting to focus on the feeling of your arms around him. And in the midst of it all, a soft smile creeps onto his face. He’s never been happier, because you actually came back for him, you truly care. And he doubts you’ll ever try to leave again. Not after how this night has turned out. 

Now you begin to realize that breaking the cycle would be catastrophic. This red routine is drawn out like a circle. It runs round and round chasing after the dreams and desires that cannot be caught. Erasing the endless line would only end up in tragedy. Whether it be for you or Taehyung, death can only decide. 

The red sun rises once again. The cycle continues on.  Wrapped up in a red embrace, it’s just a part of the routine.

© cybsoo2 2024, all rights reserved

[wangxianficfinder]

In the mood for...

Nov 6th

~*~

1. Hello! Thank you everyone and the admins for doing the great work 🥰

A - Itmf for fics where Wei Wuxian (or someone else) develops a talisman/curse or somehing that shows people's bio relations (maybe to prove he is not a Jiang/to prove the Jins evil/any other reason), and the use of such thing causes secrets and misdeeds of others to turn up. Any kind of chaotic or angsty energy and everyone in shock and trying to manage the damage of their secrets aired out for the audience.

I have no preference over whether Wei Ying turns out to a Wen/actually Jiang/anything else, but it would be great if he finds out he is not all alone in the world in means of blood and is accepted into someone's loving arms. The Lan family angst is cool, but please no Lan Xichen or Lan Zhan's bashing (But everyone else can have a field day)

B - As an alternative, just a modern AU with Wei Ying doing some kind of DNA testing to prove his relations and the concequences/reactions of others is also acceptable.

P.S. I have recently read All Things Belong by kuroi_atropos, amazing work, so i wanted to read something else in this field. Definitely recommend! @shellennium

1A)

❤️ And Time Is But a Paper Moon by sami (M, 138k, WangXian, XiChengQing, Time Travel, Fix-It, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Healing, Mental Health Issues, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Depression, BAMF WWX, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, BAMF JYL, Getting Together) it occurs in chapter 12. my suggestion for 1a fills the first half of the request, WWX doesn't discover any relatives though

Debts of a Child Part 2 by Hauntcats (M, 111k, WangXian, YZY Bashing, Not Jiang Family Friendly, Angst and Feels, lots of anger, JC Bashing, not Jiang friendly, Angst with a Happy Ending, Content warning for icky spiders in later chapters., hurt no comfort for Jiang siblings.)

Cuckold by ramber (M, <1k, Madam Jin/OMC)

Sunset, Sunrise by Ariana Deralte (ArianaDeralte) (T, 57k, WWX & WRH, WangXian, WIP, Time Travel Fix-It, Crack, Temporary Character Death, sorry I killed a-Yuan for a few paragraphs before the time travel, WWX is a Wen, Genius WWX, WRH gets to rewatch the series as a treat, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, in this house we acknowledge that all the sects have flaws, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, WWX Has ADHD, Bad Parents JFM & YZY, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Autistic LWJ) (link in 8C)

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2. hello! thank you for all the work you do. itmf: wangxian not returning to cloud recesses post-canon and them having a strained relationship with the lans that wwx IS NOT guilty about. no CQL please. bonus if sizhui leaves with them but not required

tails and scales series by notsofluffyunicorn (E, 37k, WangXian, Fluff and Angst, Dragon LWJ, Fox WWX, LWJ Has Feelings, LWJ Needs a Hug, LWJ Leaves the Gusu Lan Sect, Hair Brushing, tail brushing, No World Building, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Autistic LWJ, Selectively Mute LWJ, because of anxiety, Healthy Communication, Soft WangXian, Married WangXian, Smut, A/B/O, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX,Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Blow Jobs, tail pulling, Rough Sex, LWJ Has a Biting Kink, LWJ & WWX Have a Breeding Kink, Dirty Talk, Non-Traditional A/B/O Dynamics, Domestic Fluff, Mpreg, Pregnant WWX, Chronic Pain, Protective LWJ, Protective WWX, Canon Divergence, Gusu Lan Sect Bashing, slight LXC bashing, But that will get better in future stories, non-graphic birth, Introspection, Rimming, POV LWJ, POV WWX, No Golden Core Transfer, No Wen remnants, WangXian Are LSZ's Parents, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, LWJ's 33 Lashes Punishment, No Thirteen Years of WWX's Death, WWX in WWX's Body, Parents WangXian, Shedding season) but it's an au so it doesn't exactly fit. They leave though and live their best lives

~*~

3. itmf fics where some combination of lwj-wwx-jc one killing the other, accidentally or otherwise.

ok if it includes mxy resurrecting wwx, or wwx raising lwj-jc as a corpse à la wen ning, but I’m not looking for this as a jumping off point for time travel or that kind of fix it. not bashing, I just want them to feel their feelings. bonus if jyl is alive in especially in a jc-wwx scenario.

💖 Regrets by antebunny (G, 37k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Time Travel, Fix-It, Temporary Character Death, Angst, Explicit Descriptions of Love, and other squishy feelings, Angst with a Happy Ending) it's cql canon and uh LWJ accidentally stabs WWX in nightless city

~*~

4. Hi! I have an ITMF! Fics where WWX is treated poorly or cruelly in the Cloud Recesses after marrying LWJ, can be with him knowing or not (or even participating), post canon or not, and him (and maybe LSZ) being rescued by one of the Jiangs or Jin Ling (or even someone else). I don't mind AUs as long as it's not modern setting ones! Bonus points if it has Jiang Yanli in it :) Thanks!! @jiangclaritybell

Concord by Deastar (T, 41k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Gusu Lan Sect Rules, Depression, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending) it covers some of what you seek. Be prepared it's very angsty.

To Bring You Back Within My Reach by ablaiseofglory (M, 22k, WIP, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Angst with a Happy Ending, No dubious consent, Adopted Children, Kid Fic, A/B/O Dynamics, omega wwx, Alpha LWJ, Misunderstandings) to bring you back within my reach by ablaiseofglory. It's a WIP but it recently updated

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5. in the mood for a fic where wangxian are VERY freak4freak or codependent… equally unhealthily obsessed w each other <3 @xinilia

truly a love story for the ages by sweetlolixo (E, 4k, WangXian, Modern AU, Omegaverse, Dark LWJ, Dark WWX, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Dark!Wangxian, Power Couple, slight daddy kink, Crack, Pregnant WWX) but I'm not sure if the vibe truly fits, they are freak4freak

~*~

6. Hiii... for the next itmf post, please recommend some lengthy time travel fics. Please can it be newer fics (2023 / 2024) and fully completed fics. Wangxian pairing, of course. Thank you 😊 🙏

there are multiple in the Same Moon Shines series by sami

Lynchpin by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 103k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Time Travel, Fix-It)

🔒 Here With Me by iamwish (T, 58k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, wwx turns this into a no war!au, Canon-Typical Violence, Period-Typical Homophobia, Bad Parent YZY, POV WWX, POV LWJ, POV JC, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, WWX Has PTSD, and also depression sometimes, Unreliable Narrator, (all of them))

A Life Without Regrets by naqaashi (M, 163k, WangXian, JFM & WWX, JC & WWX, WRH & WWX, LXC & LWJ, LQR & LWJ, LWJ & NHS, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, musical cultivation, Slow Burn, Pining, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Murder Husbands, PTSD, BAMF WWX, Demonic Cultivation, POV WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Worldbuilding, No Yīn Iron, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Artist WWX, Musician WWX, Night Hunts, Fate & Destiny, Bad Parent JFM & YZY, Golden Core, Cultivation Theory, Sentient Burial Mounds, Father-Son Relationship, Dysfunctional Family, Grief/Mourning, Parent-Child Relationship, Angry WWX, Pining WWX, WWX is Not Okay, No Golden Core Transfer, BAMF LWJ, Pining LWJ, POV LWJ, Angry LWJ, One-Braincell Wangxian, Love Confessions, Idiots in Love)

We’ll Build A Dynasty (one the heavens can’t shake) by One_eyed_God (T, 66k, WangXian, WWX & WQ, WWX & WN, WWX & JYL, canon typical Jiang family dynamics, BAMF WWX, Canon JC Characteristics, POV Outsider, Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Relationship, WWX is a Wen, Sect Leader WWX, Genius WWX, The Casual Intimacy of Hand-Holding, A Love Letter to WWX, Not JC Friendly, Time Travel Fix-It)

🔒Til Death Do Us Part by Thyone14 (Not Rated, 73k, WangXian, Time Travel, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Character Death, WWX Needs a Hug, Protective LWJ, Soft WangXian, POV LWJ, POV Alternating, No Smut, POV WWX)

The Stranger Inside My Son by Mademoiselle_A (T, 73k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, But from an outsider's POV, JC is So Done, JFM's A+ parenting, YZY's A+ Parenting, Both are not great but this is not a bashing fic, JC-centric, But from JFM's POV lol, POV Outsider) is focused on Jiang Cheng but Wangxian do get together in it.

🔒if you can’t beat them, recruit them by moeblobmegane (T, 228k, Wangxian, NHS & WWX, WWX & WQ, Time Travel Fix-It, Conspiracy, Spies & Secret Agents, Team as Family, Found Family, Burial Mounds, Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, Pining, Morally Ambiguous Character, Rumors, Politics, Developing Friendships, Good Uncle LQR, Demonic Cultivation, YilingWei Sect)

💖 The Echoes of that News Ring Loud by Scarlet_Gryphon (T, 111k, NHS & NMJ, 3zun, sangning, wangxian, time travel, fix-it, nie wwx, happy ending)

Moments of Revelation by meyari (T, 133k, ChengSang, WangXian, XiYao, POV JC, Canon Divergence, Temporary Character Death, Character Death, not anyone we care about, Time Travel Fix-It, Self-Sacrifice, Torture, Chronic Pain, Chronic anxiety, Grief/Mourning, PTSD, Chronic Mental Health Issues, Assassination, renamed MY, Families of Choice, Unreliable Narrator(s), Demonic Possession) Plus others by the same author

A Narrow Bridge by FrameofMind, Jo Lasalle (Jo_Lasalle) (E, 700k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Canon Divergence, Slow Burn, Getting Together, First Time, Pining while fucking, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Angst with a Happy Ending, CQL Verse, almost everybody lives/almost nobody dies, epistolary-ish, canon-ish side pairings, radishes) is my fav time travel long fic but it was late 2022 so it doesn't exactly match the newer fics (2023 / 2024) qualification.

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7. ITMF fics where wwx gets a different title? Like in “dispersing clouds” or “flowers blooming” he has a different title than YL - if there’s smut, no b!lwj, and ideally nothing cql compliant (but donghua/novel/audio drama/manhua/etc is fine) @lovelyiknow

Just go forward like you mean it by tawaen (M, 101k, WangXian, WWX & WN &WQ, WWX & JYL, NHS & WWX, Canon Divergence, WWx does not attend the Wen indoctrination, WWX saves Lotus Pier, Inventor WWX, No Golden Core Transfer, Sect Leader JYL, JC Has No Golden Core, Bad Parents JFM & YZY, Not JC Friendly, but he gets a happier ending than canon so don’t look here for bashing)

🧡 All will be well when the day is done by abCEE (T, 76k, WangXIan, Canon Divergence, Fix It, Not Jiang Family Friendly, JFM & YZY Bashing, Fix it for our main characters, Time Travel, Butterfly Effect, Madam Lan Lives, No Sunshot Campaign, Artistic License, Unreliable Narrator, JC Bashing, non-yunmeng WWX, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Good Uncle LQR, OOC, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, WWX gets the love and care that he deserves from the very beginning, WWX Isn’t Adopted by the Jiangs, verbal and physical (c/o Zidian) abuse from YZY) link in #8B

🔒💖 Resilience. by Vrishchika (T, 7k, WangXian, Time Travel, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, Not JC Friendly, Self-Indulgent)

A Life Without Regrets by naqaashi (M, 163k, WangXian, JFM & WWX, JC & WWX, WRH & WWX, LXC & LWJ, LQR & LWJ, LWJ & NHS, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, musical cultivation, Slow Burn, Pining, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Murder Husbands, PTSD, BAMF WWX, Demonic Cultivation, POV WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Worldbuilding, No Yīn Iron, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Artist WWX, Musician WWX, Night Hunts, Fate & Destiny, Bad Parent JFM & YZY, Golden Core, Cultivation Theory, Sentient Burial Mounds, Father-Son Relationship, Dysfunctional Family, Grief/Mourning, Parent-Child Relationship, Angry WWX, Pining WWX, WWX is Not Okay, No Golden Core Transfer, BAMF LWJ, Pining LWJ, POV LWJ, Angry LWJ, One-Braincell Wangxian, Love Confessions, Idiots in Love) link in #6

💙🔒 Away from Trouble by Ilona22 (M, 15k, WangXian, Not JC Friendly, LWJ/WWX Get a Happy Ending)

Lay my body down by tawaen (M, 48k, WWX & WQ, WWX & WN, wangxian, WWX & JYL, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Eventual WangXian, No Golden Core Transfer, Not Cultivation World Friendly, Canon-Typical Violence, Not JC Friendly, What if WWX saw the first siege of the burial mounds and said Nope to the war, OCs, OC point-of-view for one chapter for plot reasons)

Take Responsibility by draechaeli (E, 187k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Mainly Novel with a few CQL and Donghua bits, Everybody Lives, Original Children Characters, Adoption, Adoption but WWX birthed them all, Mpreg, Teen Pregnancy, Pregnancy Kink, Male Lactation, Lactation Kink, Consensual Non-Consent, Light Bondage, Pregnant Sex, easy to skip nsfw chapters, Fix-It, Happy Ending)

🧡 the river brought you here by chilianxianzi (Not Rated, 11k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, POV Outsider, Amnesia, Past abuse, Strangulation, Found Family)

Trials of Time by Muggle_Diary (E, 32k, wangxian, major character death, underage, time travel, not jiang friendly, not YZY friendly, not JC friendly, butterfly effect)

To Sizhui by countingcr0ws (E, 21k, WangXian, Librarian LWJ, Mistaken Identity, Requited Love, Mental Link, Soul Bond, Genius WWX, Romance, Fluff, Banter, Epistolary, Love Poems, Footnotes, Smut, Laughter During Sex, Cultivation Sect Politics, Canon Divergence, Love Letters)

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8. I'm looking for fics where A) YZY does sever WWX hand and things still go bad for YMJ (no cql characterization please, I don't like JC, so novel canon please) , B) Madam Lan lives (her best life and if the Wei couple is alive too - amazing), C) the two Nie Furen - any fics that talk or have any of them live, D) WWX (and maybe LWJ) raises a daughter or interacts with his grandchildren. Thank you! @secretartquotes

8A)

💖 Love made visible by Moominmammashandbag (M, JYL/ZZL, wangxian, hurt/Comfort, amputation, major character injury, sibling love, angst w happy ending, cooking as cultivation, attempted rape/non-con, sexual assault, minor character death, family angst, dysfunctional family, protective siblings, near drowning, amnesia)

8B)

in stillness, clear water to the bottom by Stratisphyre (T, 40k, CSSR/WCZ/LQR, LQR & Madam Lan, CSSR & LQR, LQR & WWX, Sect Leader Nie/NHS's Mother/NMJ's Mother, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Canon-Typical Violence, Threesome - M/M/F, Getting Together, Friends to Lovers, Everyone lives, (mostly), (not you qingheng-jun), Family feelings, Madam Lan lives, references to past rape)

The Dreams of Youth by sami (E, 86k, wangxian, time travel, fix-it, family, not lan sect friendly, canon typical violence & gore, childhood friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, mothers who live, some people live/not everyone dies)

Sail Away Sweet Sister by sami (M, 73k, WangXian, YZY/CSSR/MDM Lan, MingLi, Time Travel, EXTREME Canon Divergence, Wide Focus Narrative, Some People Live/Not Everyone Dies, Most Named/Canon Characters Live, Childhood Friends to Lovers, Families of Choice, Parenthood, this work contains a major tonal shift, Fluff, Angst, Underage Sex, not particularly explicit, but not at all ambiguous, PTSD, Only a tiny bit, Unforeseeable consequences, The butterfly effect, Slightly Dark JYL, Asexual Characters, but that’s not really the focus, Canon-Typical Violence)

🧡 All will be well when the day is done by abCEE (T, 76k, WangXIan, Canon Divergence, Fix It, Not Jiang Family Friendly, JFM & YZY Bashing, Fix it for our main characters, Time Travel, Butterfly Effect, Madam Lan Lives, No Sunshot Campaign, Artistic License, Unreliable Narrator, JC Bashing, non-yunmeng WWX, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Good Uncle LQR, OOC, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, WWX gets the love and care that he deserves from the very beginning, WWX Isn’t Adopted by the Jiangs, verbal and physical (c/o Zidian) abuse from YZY)

💖 An Unexpected Visitor by Hauntcats (G, 8k, QHJ/Madam Lan, wangxian, fix-it of sorts, not Jiang friendly, not jin friendly, happy ending)

Every Mother’s Son by Chrononautical (T, 11k, WangXian, Madam Lán Lives, Madam Lán Deserves Better, Madam Lán Leaves Cloud Recesses, Madam Lan rescues women from abusive husbands in feudal Japan and honestly that’s so valid of her, mentions of rape/non-con between Madam Lan & Qingheng-Jun)

no step had trodden black by Stratisphyre (T, 32k, wangxian, LQR & WWX, JYL/JZX, canon divergence, madam lan lives, past rape, golden core reveal, hurt/Comfort, referenced to attempted suicide & suicidal thoughts, canon-typical violence)

8C)

Sunset, Sunrise by Ariana Deralte (ArianaDeralte) (T, 57k, WWX & WRH, WangXian, WIP, Time Travel Fix-It, Crack, Temporary Character Death, sorry I killed a-Yuan for a few paragraphs before the time travel, WWX is a Wen, Genius WWX, WRH gets to rewatch the series as a treat, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, in this house we acknowledge that all the sects have flaws, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, WWX Has ADHD, Bad Parents JFM & YZY, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Autistic LWJ)

in stillness, clear water to the bottom by Stratisphyre (T, 40k, CSSR/WCZ/LQR, LQR & Madam Lan, CSSR & LQR, LQR & WWX, Sect Leader Nie/NHS's Mother/NMJ's Mother, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Canon-Typical Violence, Threesome - M/M/F, Getting Together, Friends to Lovers, Everyone lives, (mostly), (not you qingheng-jun), Family feelings, Madam Lan lives, references to past rape) link in #8B

8D)

Attempting the Impossible by Ariaste (T, 36k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Post-Canon, Yunmeng Bros Reconciliation, Adoption, Family Fluff, Kid fic, Family drama, Fluff, 🔒[PODFIC] Attempting the Impossible by Ariaste by lunatique)

🔒 Little Stars by Aki_no_hikari (G, 4k, WangXian, Family Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Canon Divergence, Yílíng Wèi Sect)

The Trouble With Politics: a Treatise on Jiang Sect Deputies Gone Rogue by Sect Leader Wei Wuxian by stiltonbasket (G, 56k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Yílíng Wèi Sect, or: the one where yu   zhenhong is a wild card, Smitten LWJ, Domestic Fluff, Politics, Happy Ending, Sect Leader WWX, Fix-It of Sorts, JZX still dies though)

Where the Lonely Ones Go by CSHfic & VSfic (T, 24k, WangXian, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Case Fic, Night Hunts Fluff, Established Relationship, Mystery, Married Life, Domestic Fluff, Haunting, Kid Fic, Post-Canon, gratuitous use of empathy)

❤️ Seen and not heard by eatmyass (E, 51k, wangxian, case fic, no sunshot, kid fic, dadxian, strangers to lovers, found family, LWJ pov, pining, fake/pretend relationship, first time, falling in love) Wei Wuxian hasn't yet adopted the children in Seen and not heard but this fic shows him protecting and teaching children.

in a river you wade by bleuett (M, 20k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Mpreg, Postpartum Depression, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Good Uncle LQR, Family Feels, Happy Ending, Kid Fic) In "in a river you wade," Lan Wangji gets pregnant with Wei Wuxian's child so we see Lan Wangji raising their daughter after Wei Wuxian's death.

~*~

9. Itmf / fic finder, idk which one to categorise it as hah-

So do we have any Hogwarts au of mdzs where wwx is ofcourse Harry, lqr is snape, Wei - sanren couple are james n lily, someone is voldy, lwj is maybe in Slytherin???? I want this fic or fics like this please! @constellationdks

How to save your school with your Best Friend by Lan_tiger (T, 30k, WangXian, XiYao, Harry Potter Setting, Modified Chamber of Secrets plot, Everyone Is Alive, Including canonically dead parents, Everyone has parents, Chinese magical school, Mostly comedy with some mystery, gryffindor! wwx, ravenclaw! lwj)

Grandmaster of the Magical Arts Series by HollowNightmare (T, 420k, WangXian, Harry Potter Setting, Chinese Hogwarts?, Slice of Life, Developing Friendships, POV Alternating, lwj is an anxious bean, Light Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Angst) although Wei Wuxian is a Slytherin in this one.

~*~

10. itmf fics where the golden core reveal happens in front of everyone?

doesn’t necessarily have to be everyone but at least a group of people? thank you for your help!

A Child’s Wish by Hauntcats (Not rated, 13k, wangxian, WWX & Wen remnants, Celestial meddling, Not JC Friendly, Fix-It, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Everyone gets what they deserve, Age Regression/De-Aging, Child LWJ)

Field Trips with Wei Wuxian by antebunny (G, 42k, WangXian, WQ & WWX, NMJ & WWX, JZX & WWX, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Found Family, Angst with a Happy Ending, Misunderstandings, Miscommunication, protective Jiang siblings, Unreliable Narrator, due to WWX assuming ppl hate him, JYL is gonna dropkick her baby bro into having friends)

just because it’s what i am by kokozy (G, 4k, wangxian, Thirteen Years of WWX’s Death, Ghost WWX, Song: Inquiry, Truth comes to light, Revelations, Golden Core Reveal, Canon Divergence, Canonical Character Death, Angst, Sad with a Happy Ending)

seldom all they seem by Fahye (E, 25k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Arranged Marriage, or rather Arranged Betrothal, followed by Weapons-Grade Thirst)

The most dangerous thing is to love by KatAnni (E, 113k, WangXian, Golden Core Reveal, Fix-It, Everybody Lives, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Canon Divergence, Hurt!WWX, Found Family, Implied/Referenced Torture, POV Multiple, Implied/Referenced Cannibalism, Panic Attacks, PTSD, Golden Core Transfer, Golden Core Transfer Fix-it, Medical Procedures, Fainting, Major Character Injury, Blood and Injury, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Asexual JC, homophobia doesn’t exist here, Marriage Proposal, Marriage, Wedding Night, Whump)

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11. For itmf- there has to be a wangxian wicked au right? It’s impossible that there isn’t

Grandmaster of Wicked Cultivation by ellienchanted, evilhobbitqueen, nx_for_short, planta_genista, westiec, zylaa (G, 6k, WangXian, Filk, musical theatre, wicked the musical, with apologies to Schwartz and Holzman, Sing along!, Canonical Character Death, Canon Temporary Character Death, Art, Podfic Available, Recording Available for Some Songs!)

No Good For The Wicked by drawifubmen (Not Rated, 2k, WIP, WangXian, Inspired by Wicked, Kinda, inspired by mdzs defying gravity animatic, wwx is a witch, they were roommates, Unreliable Narrator, POV Third Person Omniscient, Wizard of Oz References, Wizard of Oz Fusion, References to Wicked - Schwartz/Holzman, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Star-crossed, Canonical Character Death, Canon Divergence) which is a WIP that recently began.

~*~

12. I've got an ITMF request, if you lovely people would be so kind. I've been reading and enjoying "all the lies on your resume" by someitems, and I was wondering if anyone has suggestions for other modern AUs where the golden core transfer is shown as chronic illness. It could be an actual golden core transfer (or partial transfer or golden core loss or whatever) in a modern with cultivation AU or an analogy for Golden Core transfer in a modern AU without magic, whatever. The important thing is that the loss of his golden core or equivalent leaves WWX with chronic illness of some kind (chronic fatigue, or chronic headaches, or needing to be careful about doing normal things so he doesn't get sick, or anything chronic illness can do). No Jiang Cheng or Jiang Yanli bashing please! Thank you mods and fic finder community! @flamingwell

silt, or scurvy series by astronicht (M, 11k, wangxian, modern w/ magic, chronic illness, Podfic: The Silt or Scurvy Series by raitala) the "silt, or scurvy" series by astronicht shows a couple of small moments in a modern wwx's life as he struggles post loss of core

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13. Hello, itmf

I wonder if anyone wrote the scene where lan zhan says aloud to lan xichen or lan qiren that he is ashamed of them.

Thank you!

~*~

14. Hello again! I've been just wondering if anyone knows a fic where Wei Ying cultivates a womb? As apparently MXTX tweeted that it was possible for him? @lostandmessedup

Impermanence, Transience, Permanence by Best Bepsy (BepsyGray) (E, 39k, wangxian, canon divergence, unplanned pregnancy, mpreg, gore, sunshot campaign, assumed miscarriage, medical procedures, childbirth, golden core reveal) Wei Ying develops a spiritual womb through dual cultivation

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15. itmf wangxian fics where wwx is not forced to reconcile with jc/ where jc is his book canon self @chellsky

Preparing the Soil by Rynne (T, 26k, WangXian, LQR & LWJ, Post-Canon, Established Relationship, Family Issues, Family Conflict, Uncle-Nephew Relationship, Chinese Holidays, Chinese New Year, Birthdays, Good Kid LSZ, Meta Arguments, POV LWJ, Protective LWJ, Married WangXian, LWJ’s Birthday, LSZ’s Birthday, Soft WangXian, LWJ Has to Talk a Lot, Gusu Lan Sect Rules, Gusu Lan Sect, Letting Go of Resentment, The WWX Rule, Good Sibling LXC, Improving Uncle LQR, Grappling with the Lans’ Part in the Siege, learning to be better, Music, LWJ is a Composer, LWJ Is Good at Communicating Actually, Not JC Friendly)

These Barren Lands In Between by lingering_song (T, 4k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Post-Canon, Married WangXian, POV Outsider, Misunderstandings, Cultivation Sect Politics, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Not JC Friendly, No JC & WWX Reconciliation)

🔒 all i take with me by justdoityoufucker (orphan_account) (T, 2k, JL & WWX, Post-Canon, Canon-Typical Violence, Not JC Friendly, Canon JC Characteristics, Families of Choice, Night Hunts, Unhealthy Relationships, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Healing, no reconciliation, Non-Linear Narrative)

keeping score by hauntedotamatone (T, 6k, LSZ & WWX, Background WangXian, the opposite of reconciliation, Protective WWX, Duelling, Grief/Mourning, not for jc fans, Swordfighting, Resentment, LSZ centric, No JC & WWX Reconciliation)

also some of the chapters from Short Prompts by Vrishchika

peacemaker no more by thelastdboy (G, 6k, JYL & WWX, JC & JYL, JC & JYL & JFM & WWX & YZY, JC & WWX & JYL, JYL & Wen Remnants, JYL & WQ, WangXian, JYL & JZX, Modern, Jiang Family Dynamics, unspecified chronic illness, POV JYL, The Eldest Daughter Experience™, Homophobia, to be specific, JC's Canon Homophobia, Not JC Friendly, Wen Remnants Live, chosen family, No JC & WWX Reconciliation, Mental Health Issues, References to Depression)

~*~

16. hi im looking for fanfics in which wwx attends jl’s birthday ceremony (lmao i forgot how it was called but i hope everybody knows what i mean by it) with a-yuan. thanks!!

The Core Issue by Hauntcats (T, 21k, WangXian, Angst with a Happy Ending, Not JC Friendly, Canon Divergence)

💖 A Crying Shame by thunderwear (G, 16k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, A-yuan to the rescue, Getting Together, Mutual Pining, Sharing a Bed, Domestic Fluff, Love Confessions, First Kiss, LWJ joins WWX at burial mounds, LWJ is soft pass it on, literally all fluff, Marriage Proposal, Oblivious WWX)

Taking Responsibility by deliciousblizzardshark (T, 6k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Getting Together, Trope Subversion/Inversion, Pretend mpreg, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Fluff and Crack) I don't think it's overtly stated that the beginning of Taking Responsibility takes place during Jin Ling's celebration but it seems like it.

~*~

17. I’m in the mood for any fics with Lan Wangji and Jiang Yanli having a strong friendship or bond. Thank you!

picking up the pieces by KouriArashi (M, 111k, JYL & LWJ, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Alternate Canon, Grief/Mourning, Angst, Regret, Family, Kid Fic, Families of Choice, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Politics, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Canon-Typical Violence, canon typical political bullshit, Eventual Happy Ending)

💖 love on 35mm by fakeplasticlily (M, 26k, WangXian, Modern, College/University, Swimming, film student LWJ, Pining, Mutual Pining, swimmer WWX, best friends LWJ and JYL, the inherent mortification of being in love with your best friend’s brother, or your older sibling’s best friend)

🔒 forever can never be long enough for me by isshun (T, 12k, WangXian, Modern, Established Relationship, Food as a Metaphor for Love, winter solstice festival, [bangs pots and pans] hello welcome to the loving wei wuxian support group, featuring co-presidents JYL and LWJ getting along and bonding over their love for WWX, JYL and LWJ getting along is my soul and jam, hurt/comfort)

My best friend's brother by mollymijh (E, 16k, WangXian, Mentions of XuanLi, mentions of xiyao, Modern AU, College/University, POV LWJ, Romance, Mutual Pining, Childhood Friends, Protective JYL, JYL and LWJ are best friends, Oblivious LWJ, Guilt, Mentions of drugging, Attempted Sexual Assault, Top LWH/Bottom WWX, Explicit Sexual Content, Shameless Smut, First Time, Dry Humping, Anal Sex, Unprotected Sex)

~*~

If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[samwhump]

a (very inexhaustive, wincest-heavy) sam whump reclist

@transfemmesam asked me for Sam whump recs a few days ago, and I've had other requests in the same vein before (I can't imagine why.../s) so I thought I would throw this together, since these authors deserve all of the love and support for their contributions to our li'l fandom corner.

like I mentioned in the title, this is not at all a comprehensive list; I have at least ~200 more fics in my to-read queue that could thematically fit here, but alas, I have stupid shit like a job and a body and a dog to take care of, so. I'm always happy to get recs along these lines, so if you notice anything important missing, hit me UP. (and don't take any omissions as any specific commentary by me -- it's likely I just haven't had the chance to read it yet, haha.)

disclaimers:

some (most, honestly) of these contain potentially triggering and dark content, including but not limited to rape/noncon, torture, and suicidal attempts & ideation. I have tried to note content warnings where applicable, and most of the works are hosted on ao3, so the tags should have most of the information you need to make an informed decision. that being said, tread with caution. all of the summaries provided are from the original author, with warnings added after by me.

the list is in alphabetical order and separated into wincest and gen categories. a lot of the gen is also focused on the sam & dean relationship, because...I am what I am. and what I am a sucker for these two dipshits. there is also a brief section at the end with a few fics that don't fit into either category.

gen

All That Goes Unspoken by amnesiawife:

A case forces Sam to confront something long kept buried. (Set nebulously in season 12.)

CW: discussions of past rape/noncon, victim blaming

Beneath the Trees 'verse by Lise (5 works total, starting with Beneath the Trees, Where Nobody Sees):

Sam doesn't go to Stanford. Everything goes downhill from there.

CW: suicidal ideation

a boy is a cage by ad_castra:

After expelling Gadreel from Sam's body, Dean thinks they're in the clear. If only they were that lucky. // S9 fic wherein Gadreel's grace causes some adverse side-effects in Sam's mind.

CW: past referenced rape/noncon, body horror

body of proof by Askance (doomcountry):

There are things Sam hasn't told his brother. They're all in the envelope laid on Dean's pillow.

CW: heavy discussion of past rape/noncon

break these bones 'til they're better by redskyatmorning:

After Sam’s torture at the hands of the British Men of Letters, the latest in a long string of violations, he is rescued by Dean and Mary – and forced to ponder his broken relationship with his own body. Months later, when Sam is resurrected and tormented by Lucifer yet again, Dean confronts Mary and Sam gets his revenge against the devil.

catching my death (staring out an open window) by ad_castra:

Sam gazes at the window, catches the faint pink hue tinting the sky. It’s so realistic - he could breathe in the fresh air if he were really here. ----- They got Sam out. Sometimes, just knowing that isn't enough.

CW: implied past rape/noncon

Death of Convenience by WilsonTheMoose:

It should have been easy. Wendigos are no joke but daylight slows them. The weather's been unpredictable though and perfect, idyllic hunts don't exactly stay that way where they're concerned. Or Sam has one card to play and never stops to think that Dean would care if he killed himself.

CW: suicidal ideation, references to suicide

Echoes of Hell by The_Nightbreaker:

It wasn't real. He wasn't in Hell anymore. That's what he tried to tell himself over and over. But two centuries of torture don't disappear in a day. Sam struggles with visions of Hell, fighting to maintain his grip on reality. Dean hates that he can't protect his brother from what isn't real—but curse him if he doesn't try. When the boys stumble on a case with ties to the Devil himself, will they be able to pull themselves together in time to stop the sacrifices? Or will the echoes of Hell finally overtake them? Aka, season 7, but the plot is Hell trauma, not leviathans.

CW: suicidal ideation

Evening Shadows by withthekeyisking:

Sam is hallucinating the monster who tortured him for nearly two centuries, Dean feels like he's failing his brother, and a diner waitress bears witness.

CW: past rape/noncon

Everything Dies Given Time by Lise:

AU from 5.03. Sam discovers something wrong with himself, and learns to live with it. Only a lot less functional.

CW: suicide/temporary character death

The Freedom to Be Loud by jribbing:

It hadn’t occurred to Dean that maybe Sam remembered so much about that little nowhere town because something memorable had happened there.

CW: referenced past rape/noncon

golgotha by redskyatmorning:

There’s a vacancy on the throne of hell, and Sam is desperate enough to save Dean from Michael’s possession to give into the abyssal depths of his own darkness.

Head Space by ameliacareful:

A witch curses Sam leaving him blind, deaf, and bedridden. Left with only the inside of his own head and the occasional touch, Sam begins to unravel.

CW: suicidal ideation

Hiraeth by inkandpaperqwerty:

(n.) a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, a home which maybe never was; the nostalgia, the yearning, the grief for the lost places of your past "Dean... I made a really big mistake." For a second, Dean actually thought things were going okay. He was out of Hell, Sam agreed to stop drinking demon blood, they had just wrapped up a successful hunt... for once, everything was okay. And then it wasn't. "I overdosed." Not at all.

CW: suicide attempts, suicidal ideation

if i could leave (i would've already left) by serendipity0930:

“I have a mission from God for you,” the Angel whispers to the man. “It is time for you to do what you were born to.” The man’s face twists into a smile, delighted over being chosen by Him, a purpose from God digging into his heart, carving out a place to fester. “Hunt.” ... 05x03 AU where Zachariah is even more determined to keep the brothers apart and hunters are all too willing to take Lucifer's True Vessel off the board for good

CW: referenced suicide

It's A River (But Not In Egypt) by Lise:

He's still a liar. Maybe always has been.

CW: toxic Sam/Lucifer dynamics

Kindred Instruments by PinBitch:

They’re in a tug of war and Sam is the rope. He doesn’t need to be alive for that. OR Sam dies in detox, being flung against the walls of a metal box will do that to you. Dean and Ruby pick up the pieces.

CW: temporary main character death, permanent supporting character death

lazarus trick by katsidhe:

Sam's alive, so everything is gonna be okay. 13.22 coda.

Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silence by Lise:

Sam's back. He's in one piece. That's the problem.

CW: self-harm

love is like ghosts by redskyatmorning:

I’m poison, Dean had said instead of I’m sorry. Well, Sam wants to say, what does that make me? What the hell does that make me? (A look into Sam's mind in the aftermath of the Gadreel possession.)

The Other Brother by RadioFriday:

Sam and Adam are pulled from the cage at the same time. Sam is not right, and Adam, stuck as his caretaker, is not pleased.

Oxygen by inkandpaperqwerty:

“Cas! Cas, please! Please, answer me! Cas!” Castiel ignores Dean for several minutes, but then Dean gives him an opening that might help him complete his mission. So, he goes to investigate, and what he finds is a very bloody, nearly dead Sam. Dean tells him where the injuries came from, and Castiel quickly becomes confused. It doesn't make sense, but Dean tries to explain it to him, and slowly... Castiel begins to understand.

CW: suicide attempt

Post Hoc, Ergo Propter Hoc by AmberSock:

Sam waits, kneeling, for his execution. What if Dean hadn't missed?

CW: temporary character death

Safety In Distance by GalaxyThreads and SpiritClusters:

The Mark of Cain is a brand of violence. Sam was an idiot to think that he'd be exempt from it, just because he and Dean are siblings.

sometimes a kind of singing by adi_rotynd:

Sam gets cursed. They're dealing with it. Jack can see souls. That one they're not dealing with quite as well.

CW: past referenced rape/noncon

Soul Windows by GalaxyThreads and Spirit Clusters:

A few months after his birth, Jack learns how to see souls. Then he comes to a realization about the Winchester brothers, Sam in particular, and it's not a pleasant one. (gen)

Starry Night by keepcalmsmile:

Sam attempts suicide-by-monster. Dean tries to help. It sort of works...until it doesn't.

CW: suicide attempts, suicidal ideation

such fragile, broken things by The_Bookkeeper:

Sam wishes that Dean would just get it over with already.

The Tale of Sir Galahad by keepcalmsmile:

Sam once said he could never be clean like Sir Galahad. Dean assumed he was just talking about the demon blood. Turns out, Sam was talking about something else too. WARNING: Extended discussions of the aftermath of rape and childhood sexual abuse (but NO description of the actual events). Happy(ish) ending, but potentially very triggering.

CW: past rape/noncon, mentioned CSA

They Hammered in His Teeth by jribbing:

Sam has a secret.

CW: suicidal ideation

today's troubles (are history tomorrow) by a_good_soldier:

"It's not really something I know how to share," Sam had said. In which Dean figures he ought to help Sam out a bit.

Touch and Go by themegalosaurus:

Tag to 9.19 (Alex Annie Alexis Ann) in which Dean realises why, exactly, Sam is so angry about what happened with Gadreel.

trust fall by ad_castra:

“I’m nothing like you,” Sam hisses. Nevermind relating to the anguish of going it alone. Nevermind that he knows what it is to be strapped down and forcibly cleansed against his will. Sam wonders if these trials are purifying Crowley as well. 

Words Like Glass by broken_cinders:

Dean never figured the cage wouldn't leave a mark. He was prepared for memories, flashbacks, and nightmares. He wasn't expecting the words Sam brought back with him or the way they made him seem just a breath beyond Dean's reach.

Wound and Unwound by fascra:

Sam stops eating spring of his freshman year.

CW: eating disorder

wincest (dean/sam)

Brittle by thecapn:

Sam Winchester has an eating disorder.

CW: eating disorder

Don't You Cry No More by sixtysevenlmpala (schittyfic):

The first time Sam gets badly hurt on a hunt, he doesn’t cry. Dean does.

Fall On Your Knees by dollylux:

Sam doesn't quite make it home on the last day of school before winter break.

The Fall Will Probably Kill You by killabeez:

Set between 7.04 and the aftermath of 7.07. Dean is not as okay as he'd like you to think. Neither is Sam.

CW: self-harm

Feels so good to feel again by Trojie:

The pain keeps Lucifer at bay, at least to start with.

Follow In Your Form by withthekeyisking:

Sam is hallucinating Lucifer in the wake of Cas bringing his Hell Wall crashing down. To make matters worse, it seems like this has his dormant powers flaring back to life.

Last Temptation by merle_p:

Sam is running a fever again, the kind of fever no Ibuprofen or cold compress will bring down, the kind of fever that is eating him up alive, eviscerating him from the inside. He is too hot and too cold and too pale, delirious and shaking, resonating with whatever divine energy the trials are subjecting him to, and Dean is not sure how much longer he can stand to see him be in this state. Because Sam is quite possibly dying, and there is nothing Dean can do to stop it. Because Sam is dying, and he just. Won’t. Shut. Up.

CW: mentioned past rape/noncon

leeches by Anonymous:

Sam discovers a spell to make everybody forget him. He’s convinced it’s for the best. Pre-Stanford.

CW: attempted kidnapping/torture

Make Thick My Blood by themegalosaurus:

“You’re going to kill me, Dean,” Sam says, eventually. And all Dean can say is, “I think I am.” A season 10 AU, set after 10x14 ('The Executioner's Song'). Cas finds a solution that might cure the Mark of Cain; but if they're going to go through with it, Sam has a terrible price to pay.

CW: mentioned past rape/noncon

Prophecy of an Abomination by ashitanoyuki:

Sam is kidnapped by fanatically religious hunters and crucified. Coming back from this won't be easy. Canon-divergent from midway through season 2.

Recall by De_Nugis:

Sam's having a hard time telling what's real and what isn't, especially when it comes to some voicemails from Dean.

The Room Upstairs by brokenlittleboy:

Sam comes back from hell, but he’s inside-out and all wrong, and Dean can’t fix him.

CW: mentioned past rape/noncon

Ruin You (and its companion fic Worth) by Mumble_Bee:

Cole fucks Sam with Demon!Dean watching from a devil's trap, snarling that anyone would dare touch what was his. “I told you I don’t care what you do to his face or his blood or his fucking nose,” Dean growled, “but you put your dick anywhere near him and I will end you.” “Better hurry up then, Dean, because I don’t think I can wait much longer.”

CW: explicit rape/noncon

Snowed In by HelloStarlingFics:

When working a case, Sam and Dean get stuck out in a shack in the woods when the snow comes in hard and fast. Trouble is, Sam’s hated the cold ever since the Cage. Time for Dean to step up and look after him.

Wake by minchout:

Gadreel has had Sam for four years, and Dean, lost in guilt and obsessed with finding a way to get his brother back, has isolated himself in a cabin in the Missouri Ozarks with nothing but the woods, a stray dog, some chickens, and all the books the Men of Letters had to offer to keep him company. Then Sam shows up one day without his passenger, and Dean learns quickly that it doesn't matter that Sam is with him again - there is still a lot of work to be done before they can find their way back to each other.

Wanting to Forget by morganaDW (morgana07):

1-shot. S1 fic. After getting Sam freed from the Benders Dean thinks all he has to cope with is some bruises and cuts. He learns quickly just how wrong he is when Sam wakes up with a nightmare, reliving his brief but bad captivity in every detail. Sam just wants to forget & Dean has to try to get him to let him help. Will one night of cruelty and pain ruin what’s been formed between them?

CW: referenced past rape/noncon

when I wake up I'm afraid, somebody else might take my place by quake_quiver:

Sam doesn’t remember the last time he cried for Dean like he did that night. And now it’s been…two weeks. Maybe more. Sam is tired, and in pain, and starting to doubt that Dean’s going to show up. He’s weak and shaking from a combination of constant pain and hunger. Sam longs for Dean. Dean would make it better. Dean would fix it.

CW: rape/noncon, body horror

Wire Inside Me by merle_p:

There are a lot of things Sam hates about his current condition, to the point where he sometimes feels for the gun under his pillow at night, blindly toys with the safety, imagines pressing the muzzle into the underside of his chin and pulling the trigger just to make it stop. But there’s nothing he hates as much as the shadows he sees in Dean’s eyes whenever his brother is looking at him these days. It’s not an expression he remembers ever seeing before, but Sam thinks it’s probably something like revulsion. Horror. Disgust. What else could it be.

CW: referenced past rape/noncon, body horror, forced pregnancy

Worth (and its companion fic Ruin You) by Mumble_Bee:

Episode 10x01 "Black" where Dean is a human, and very, very, pissed off to hear someone has hands on his brother. “It’s nothing personal,” Cole whispered into Sam's ear, too quietly for Dean to hear, “but I need to kill your brother, and I need him off his game when he gets here. I don’t wanna hurt you, kid, but I’m going to, anyway. I’m going to hurt you a lot."

CW: explicit rape/noncon

you'll never see us again by according2thelore:

Then finally, his eyes trail over to Dean. His pupils are pin-point thin, and his hair is straggling in his face so Dean can’t see most of what expression lies there. Sam usually wakes up from nightmares in one of three attitudes: confusion, fear, or calm. A scary, sense-prickling calm that Dean hates more than anything else. Resignation, almost. Or: Sam suffers from nightmares and touch starvation post-Cage. They do their best to deal.

other Sam/Lucifer noncon

Cage Fight (No Way To Do This Right) by Dyed_Red:

Sam’s visit to the cage is already going awry, but Dean’s one-man rescue ends up skidding it sideways into territory neither him or Sam are ready for. (Gratuitous episode scene re-write. If Cas hadn’t come till after, if he hadn’t been there yet when Dean ran down to the 'parole' cage after hearing Sam scream - how bad could it have got for the brothers before he made it?)

CW: graphic rape/noncon

Into Being by withthekeyisking:

When Sam wakes up in the cave on Apocalypse World after having been killed by vamps, it's not just to find Lucifer there with him. It's to find him in him.

CW: graphic rape/noncon, necrophilia, forced pregnancy

Reggie/Tim/Sam noncon

a pointless resistance for you by withthekeyisking:

Sam doesn't know how long he's been with Tim and Reggie by the time Dean shows up and tries to take him out of there. Long enough that's he's already lost one baby and is pregnant with the next. Long enough that this life is starting to feel like all he knows.

CW: graphic rape/noncon, forced pregnancy & miscarriage, victim blaming

screaming birds sound an awful lot like singing by withthekeyisking:

Sam has done his best to move past what Tim and Reggie did to him, pretending it never happened at all. But running into them again makes that very difficult—especially when Dean gets involved.

CW: referenced past rape/noncon

Waste 'Em All by withthekeyisking:

When Tim and Reggie try to force the demon blood down Sam's throat, he spits it back out. He has no interest in being turned into their own personal attack dog. They don't...take it well.

CW: explicit rape/noncon

[horriblegoosefest]

A Design For Life

By: @Maesterchill Paring(s): Drarry Rating: E Word Count: 76,887 Warnings/Content: Implied/referenced sexual assault, terrorist attack, implied/referenced monsterfucking Goose:

Tags:

enemies to lovers, time travel, hogwarts eighth year, post-hogwarts, depressed Harry Potter, magical accidents, drinking games, talismans, magical empathy perfume, potions, sex pollen, implied/referenced terrorism, doppelganger, the ministry of magic is corrupt (Harry Potter), auror corruption (Harry Potter), safehouses, captivity, prison, implied/referenced sexual assault, terrorist attack, minor character death, drugs, drug addiction, coma, magical theory (Harry Potter), magical artifacts, ley lines, magaliths, road trip, ireland, boat trip, Gilderoy Lockhart the self insert writer, Pebble Potter (OC), minor Draco Malfoy/Gregory Goyle, Greg Goyle is good at sharing, implied/referenced monsterfucking, bathing/washing, adventure, mystery, on the run, runes, rituals, race against time, wanking, sex, ancient magic, getting together, brief suicidal thoughts, angst and fluff and smut, angst with a happy ending

Summary:

Harry Potter doesn't want to become an Auror. And Draco Malfoy would quite like to stay alive and out of harm’s way. Neither have any desire whatsoever to time-travel into the future, especially not with each other. But fate? Well, she has other plans.

A honk of appreciation from goose @citrusses:

You are not prepared for this time-traveling, mind-bending romance from the incredible Maesterchill! This is a fast-paced fic fueled by page-turning* (*browser-scrolling) action that still finds time to be packed with humour, scorching sex, and incredible character development. Harry's narration is pitch-perfect: the way he feels about Draco evolves from such a wonderfully prickly resentment (not to mention finding him frustratingly gorgeous) to something absolutely soul-consuming. I had such a wonderful time watching Maester build this magnum opus, and I am so excited for the rest of you to experience it!

[juliana-jones]

My co-author @writtenriley and I are thrilled to present our self-published novella “Over the Dragon’s Gate,” a dark paranormal romance/urban fantasy. You’ve heard of manic pixie dream girl, now get ready for sad pond-monster dream boy!

Summary: Treya has everything he needs in his pond: food, shelter, and other fish to swim with. It’s painful to wonder if he had another life once, so he ignores the fragments of disturbing dreams that plague him.

But when a boy falls into his pond, Treya discovers he’s more than a fish. He can also become a boy, and now he has a friend: the irrepressible Eli. During secret meetings in the garden surrounding the pond, Treya and Eli forge a bond that even dark magic can’t break. But when Eli starts asking questions about who and what Treya is, the two of them discover that questions are dangerous, answers have a cost, and their fates depend on unraveling the mystery of Treya’s past.

Comps: It has "That Story Isn't the Story" vibes mixed with "Room."

Word count: 44k

Books2Read

Kindle

Goodreads

Soundtrack

Content warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, death, gaslighting, memory loss, amnesia, mind manipulation, mind control, implied noncon (in the background, due to the mind control), crying (a lot of crying), vomit, underage drinking, implied/referenced drug use, car accidents, child neglect, child abuse, murder, kidnapping, imprisonment, magical imprisonment, trauma, suicidal ideation, suicide attempt (planned but not carried out), death threats, fantasy racism

“…[A] delightful read, full of magic and touching moments of humanity in the face of darkness.”

~Arista A. Holmes, author of the Fey Touched Trilogy

“This is a rollercoaster… There are thrilling twists and turns, enough mystery to keep you going, and a satisfying payoff at the end.”

~E, Goodreads review

“It’s got… a lush fairytale manner about it but hides dark secrets.”

~Oliver Ferrie, author of Sugar People

[kokoch4n3l]

DEAD GIRL'S BEACH࿐ྂ KUROKAWA IZANA x f!oc x SANO MANJIRO

EIGHT — open water

"Mr. Kurokawa harbours a deep-seated resentment towards his younger brother, stemming from a sense of inadequacy and inferiority. he speaks of his brother with a fond tone but i doubt 'fondness' is what Mr. Kurokawa feels for him" – MAYA'S ROUGH NOTES ON K.I

chapter summary: After a phone call with Chifuyu, Mikey and Maya begin to drift closer like two boats caught in a storm and Izana watches with great interest, getting ready to crash down on both of them when the time is right.

chapter warnings: dark content 18+, corruption, bribery, implied/referenced prostitution, wet dreams, masturbation(m), jerking off, narcissist!manjiro, mention of past waterboarding, torture, noncon drugging, dehumanization, (slight)humiliation, hand kink, finger sucking, murder, dom/sub undertones, making out, soft dom!manjiro, praise kink, fingering(f receiving), overstimulation, biting, hickeys, multiple orgasms, cunnilingus, slightly unrealistic sex, smut, p in v sex, vaginal penetration, dacryphilia, creampie, unprotected sex, aftercare, brief mention of Korean + Japanese history, gang activity, mention of suicide

word count: 13318

masterlist | previous | chapter 9

Naoto sat at his desk in the dimly lit police station, his gaze fixed on the paper before him. A frown creased his brow as he absorbed the disappointing news: his request for a search warrant targeting Ran Haitani, the owner of several notorious clubs and a key figure in Japan's most ruthless gang, the Tokyo Manji Gang, had been denied. Frustration simmered within him as he clenched his jaw, his mind racing with thoughts of Maya's safety. Ran Haitani's reputation preceded him—he was known for his connections to the underworld and his penchant for exploiting vulnerable women, especially those as striking as Kaneko Maya. Naoto's thoughts drifted back to Chifuyu's account of that fateful night when they all went out together. Chifuyu had mentioned Mitsuya Takashi pulling Maya away from Ran at the club when she was intoxicated—a detail that had set off alarm bells in Naoto's mind. Slumping back in his chair, Naoto weighed his options, his determination flickering in the face of adversity. Despite the setback, he refused to abandon their pursuit of the truth. Maya's safety was at stake, and he couldn't afford to let obstacles derail their investigation. She could have really just left town and moved to a different city but the chances of that were low. Naoto's frustration simmered as he pushed himself away from his desk, his resolve firm. He couldn't accept defeat, not when Maya's safety hung in the balance. With determined strides, he made his way out of the precinct and toward the police commissioner's office. Naoto found himself face-to-face with the commissioner, who was counting a stack of bills with a casual air. His expression was aloof, barely acknowledging Naoto's presence. Without a preamble, Naoto launched into the reason for his visit, his tone firm and unwavering. "Commissioner, I need to know why my warrant to investigate Haitani Ran was denied" he stated bluntly, his gaze piercing.

The commissioner glanced up from his task, his gaze icy as he regarded Naoto. "Tachibana, you're wasting your time" he replied dismissively, his voice laced with indifference.

Naoto bristled at the response, his frustration bubbling to the surface. "But we have reason to believe that Haitani may be involved in Kaneko Maya's disappearance," he argued, his voice tinged with urgency "Not to mention he's been accused multiple times of human and drug trafficking!"

The commissioner let out a disdainful snort, rolling his eyes as if Naoto's concerns were trivial. "And without evidence, your suspicions are worthless," he retorted, his tone dripping with condescension.

Naoto's jaw clenched in frustration, but he knew arguing further would be futile. With a curt nod, he turned on his heel and stormed out of the commissioner's office. As Naoto left the commissioner's office, a gnawing suspicion began to take root in his mind. The commissioner's dismissive attitude and casual demeanour while handling money raised red flags. Could there be corruption within the department? The thought sent a chill down Naoto's spine. If there were indeed corrupt elements within the police force, it could explain why his warrant for investigating Ran Haitani was denied despite the compelling evidence. With a sense of urgency, Naoto resolved to tread carefully. If corruption existed, he couldn't trust anyone within the department. Maybe he had to do this on his own. "Hey nē-chan," Naoto says pressing his phone to his ear as he leaves the station and gets into his car "Are you home now?"

"yeah, I got home a little while ago. I'm going out with Takemichi in a while" Hinata answers "Taking a longer shift tonight?"

Naoto sighs, starting the car. He puts the phone on speaker and set it in the cup holder next to him. "Yeah... Kinda"

There is a short moment of silence till Hinata speaks up again. "any news on Maya?"

Naoto isn't too sure what to say. He feels like shit. Hinata had encouraged him to go after her, to court Kaneko Maya because he wasn't able to stop himself from asking questions about her after seeing her at Chifuyu's house. She was pretty. Kaneko Maya was gorgeous. But he wouldn't be stupid to think she'd like him back. It was obvious to Naoto that she had a thing for Chifuyu. There was no harm in showing interest though right? He wasn't being pushy, he was being respectful about his attraction to her. But of course, that whole thing went down the drain when he got a call from Chifuyu telling him that she went missing. Part of him was angry at Chifuyu because maybe there was nothing that happened to Maya and she just ran because she got her heart broken. But it was way too clean of an escape.

How the hell did she pay off her student loans so fast?

There were just so many red flags about the situation. She couldn't have just cut off contact and moved. There was absolutely no way. He had a gut feeling and he'd follow it. "Naoto" Hinata says and he pulls out of the parking lot "What's wrong?"

Naoto sighs. He was never able to hide anything from his sister. How he hid that her boyfriend was a whole fucking time traveller is beyond him. "I was talking about getting a warrant against—"

"Haitani Ran, yeah I heard you and Chifuyu talking about it" Hinata says

Naoto narrows his eyes at no one in particular. Of course, she was eavesdropping. "Anyways" Naoto mutters "It got denied"

"huh? Why?"

"corruption probably," Naoto tells her, then getting quickly agitated half yells  "I'm a fucking detective and I can't do my job because my superiors want to bow down to a bunch of criminals! What the fuck am I supposed to do?"

Hinata is silent after that and so is Naoto. Neither of them said anything for a while. Naoto didn't like Tokyo Manji Gang; especially after learning that they would kill his older sister in the future. The date Hanagaki Takemichi had initially told him had long passed but he still felt wary. It was bad enough that Hinata hung out with the former top members of Tokyo Manji Gang. What if something happened to his sister when he wasn't paying attention and— "Naoto..." Hinata finally speaks, her voice still sounding soft even through the phone "You know you can tell me what's wrong..."

He couldn't. What the fuck was he supposed to say? Hey nē-chan, your boyfriend is a time traveller and I'm his trigger and we're working together to stop you from fucking dying. That doesn't seem like it will be an easy conversation. "I just..." His eyes blur with tears when he stops at the red light "I'm scared something might happen to you..."

Naoto hears Hinata let out a shaky breath and now he feels bad. She was probably crying now. Oh man did he hate making his sister cry. She always worried about him and this probably made her worry more. Older sisters were just like that. "Naoto..." Her voice is a little shaky this time "You know I'll be fine"

Naoto's grip on the steering wheel tightened as he fought to keep his emotions in check. He couldn't burden Hinata with the weight of his fears, especially not now when she needed reassurance the most. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, Naoto forced a calm facade. "I know, Hinata. I just... I worry that's all" he replied, his voice strained with emotion.

Hinata's silence hung heavy in the air, the unspoken understanding between them palpable. Naoto hated seeing his sister upset, but he couldn't shake the feeling of impending danger that loomed over them Naoto heard Hinata let out a shaky breath, and guilt washes over him. He didn't want to make her worry, didn't want to see her cry. But he couldn't shake the nagging fear that plagued him. "Naoto," Hinata's voice is steadier now, filled with quiet resolve. "Just focus on finding Maya, okay?"

Her words offer a sliver of comfort, a reminder of the strength they both carried within them. With a nod, Naoto swallows his fears and steels himself for the challenges ahead. Maya's safety was paramount, but so was his sister's. And he would do whatever it took to protect them both. "Okay," Naoto murmured, his voice thick with emotion. "Just... be safe, Hinata. Especially when you're with Takemichi."

There was a pause on the other end of the line, filled with unspoken understanding. Hinata's relationship with Takemichi was a source of concern for Naoto, given his ties to the dangerous world of the Tokyo Manji Gang. Sure Hanagaki Takemichi had long left the Tokyo Manji Gang when the latter was in high school but he felt a little wary about it, especially with how close he used to be with Sano Manjiro. But he trusted Hinata's judgment, even if he couldn't shake the nagging worry in the pit of his stomach. "I will, Naoto," Hinata replied softly. "I promise."

With a heavy heart, Naoto bid his sister goodbye, his mind still consumed by worry even as the call ended. He couldn't shake the feeling of impending danger, the constant fear that something would happen to those he loved most. As he resumed his drive, Naoto's thoughts drifted back to Maya and the investigation at hand. Despite the obstacles in his path, he was determined to uncover the truth and bring her home safely. But even as he focused on the task ahead, a part of him remained haunted by the ghost of danger lurking in the shadows. With a silent prayer for the safety of his sister, Naoto pulls into the visitor parking lot of Chifuyu and Kazutora's apartment building. He gets out of his car and locks it then walks up to their apartment and knocks on the door. Not too long later, Chifuyu opens it. "so?" Chifuyu says letting Naoto in

"Denied"

Chifuyu's face falls as he closes the door and locks it. "Denied?!" Kazutora calls from the living room

They walk into the living room and Naoto takes a seat on the couch as does Chifuyu next to Kazutora. The TV was playing a Korean drama as Chifuyu had been obsessed with them lately after Hinata forced him to watch one. "I suspect corruption in the station" Naoto says with a sigh "The warrant against Haitani Ran was been denied"

"That's fuckin' stupid!" Kazutora said "Everyone and their mom knows that guy is a fricken pimp. Why "

The three of them try to come up with plans on their own but it's hopeless. "hey... What if..." Naoto says but then stops

It was a stupid idea. "what?" Chifuyu asks "Even if it's stupid might as well say it"

They're all tired and failure after failure has made them open to really anything at this point. Naoto sighs and says "What if you try contacting Sano Manjiro?"

It was a stupid idea to contact their former leader. Chifuyu and Kazutora were no longer a part of the Tokyo Manji Gang. Even if Chifuyu left on better terms than Kazutora did, it was still a very heavy gamble. Tokyo Manji Gang was no longer what it was in the past and Sano "Mikey" Manjiro wasn't the same anymore either. As Naoto's suggestion hung in the air, a tense silence enveloped the room. The mere mention of Sano Manjiro's name stirred a whirlwind of conflicting emotions within Chifuyu and Kazutora. Chifuyu's jaw tightened as he considered the risky proposition. Contacting their former leader was a gamble they couldn't afford to take lightly, especially considering their tenuous ties to the Tokyo Manji Gang. Kazutora's gaze flickered with uncertainty, his brows furrowing in contemplation. The memories of his cataclysmic departure from the gang still lingered, leaving a bitter taste in his mouth. But as they weighed the pros and cons of Naoto's suggestion, a sense of desperation crept over them. Time was running out, and they were no closer to finding Maya than they had been before. "We don't have much of a choice, do we?" Chifuyu finally spoke, his voice laced with resignation. "If it means finding Maya, then... I'll do it."

Naoto nodded in agreement, his expression determined. "We need all the help we can get. And if reaching out to Sano is our best shot, then we have to take it."

With a heavy sigh, Kazutora relented, his shoulders sagging with defeat. "I'm not going to be doing any talking for very obvious reasons. This is on you Chifuyu... You call him"

The tension in the room lingered, thick and palpable, as they grappled with the weight of their decision. But amidst the uncertainty, one thing remained clear: they were willing to do whatever it took to bring Maya home, even if it meant confronting their past and risking everything they held dear.

In a dimly lit room, Mikey lay sprawled on his bed, bathed in the soft glow of moonlight filtering through the curtains. His features were relaxed in sleep, his chest rising and falling rhythmically with each breath. As he drifted deeper into slumber, his mind conjured vivid images, blurring the line between dreams and reality. In the depths of his subconscious, he found himself enveloped in a steamy haze, his senses ablaze with desire. In the dream, he stood amidst a swirl of passion and longing, his body pressed close to the intoxicating figure before him. Her presence was electric, igniting a fire within him that burned with an intensity he couldn't deny. Their lips met in a fervent embrace, a symphony of desire and longing as they surrendered to the primal urge that pulsed between them. Each touch sent shivers down his spine, awakening a hunger that threatened to consume him whole. Maya is there. Right underneath him. Her body is a blur to his hazed mind but fucking hell she's gorgeous. "so pretty" dream him coos at her

Her moans sound gorgeous. He couldn't get enough of them. As Mikey's dream unfolded, Maya's presence engulfed him in a whirlwind of desire and longing. In the hazy depths of his subconscious, she was there, her form a blur of beauty and temptation that left him breathless. In the dim light of his dream, Maya's features were a tantalizing mystery, her essence intoxicating and irresistible. With every caress, every whispered word, Mikey felt himself drawn deeper into the depths of ecstasy, lost in the intoxicating spell of desire. In that moment, nothing else mattered but the heady rush of pleasure that pulsed between them, binding them together in a fierce embrace. But as the dream reached its peak, a flicker of awareness stirred within Mikey's subconscious, a fleeting whisper of doubt that threatened to shatter the illusion. With a jolt, he was wrenched from the depths of his dream, his eyes snapping open to the harsh reality of his surroundings. For a moment, he lay there in silence, his heart still racing with the echoes of passion. But as the remnants of the dream faded away, a sense of longing washed over him, leaving him with a profound sense of emptiness. "god fucking damn it" Mikey cursed

With a heavy sigh, Mikey pushed himself upright, his thoughts drifting to the enigmatic figure that had haunted his dreams. Maya's presence lingered in his mind like a tantalizing memory. He remembers hearing her say to Izana that she would haunt him but right now— even since he met her— it felt like she was haunting him and not Izana. He couldn't get her out of his mind. Mikey gets out of the guest bedroom bed and heads over to the bathroom. He's so fucking hard and it's so annoying. He locks the door and turns on the exhaust fan and then the lights. "shit" Mikey mutters as the light hits his eyes

He stands in front of the sink and ties his hair back then washes his face with cold water, hoping it would make his stupid boner go down. But obviously, it doesn't. He looks at the mirror and stares at himself. Mikey knows he looks like a damn mess but wow was he a hot ass mess. His skin is pale and even though he looks like he hasn't slept in days he sure makes eye bags work. His hair is perfectly messy, tied back. He looks really good and all that admiring just made him even harder and Mikey bites back a groan. He can't help himself as he slips his hand down his shorts. He hisses as the tips of his fingers touch his cockhead then takes hold of his shaft. fuck it felt good. "shit" He mutters and pushes the front of his shorts down to fully expose his cock and make getting himself off easier

His mind shifts back to Maya as he slowly starts to move his hand. Mikey remembers overhearing a conversation between Maya and Izana where Izana had practically forced out a confession from her that she liked Matsuno Chifuyu, that he took her virginity and rejected her. Yeesh. Apparently, it happened the night before Izana abducted her. Mikey couldn't believe it. How the fucking hell had Chifuyu taken Maya's virginity and he didn't leave any marks. Absolutely fucking unbelievable. "ahh~" Mikey tries to keep his moans silent since everyone was still awake

Mikey couldn't stop thinking about Maya the moment he saw her lying by the water after Izana waterboarded her. He vividly remembers her bloodshot eyes and flushed cheeks, the way her hair stuck to her skin, and her watery blue eyes. Mikey just couldn't get her out of his head. Maya was gorgeous, breathtaking, beautiful— there was no word in any language in the world he could use to properly describe her beauty. Maya's beauty was just unworldly. Not to mention those noises she was letting out the other day when he interrupted her and Izana. "shit, shit" He groans, staring at himself in the mirror as he gets himself off

Mikey uses his free hand to pull the end of his shirt up and holds it between his teeth as he gets himself off. He looks good. Really fucking good. His eyes are glossed over, cheeks flushed, he's getting a little sweaty and his bangs are sticking to his forehead. His abs are still just as impressive(maybe even more) as when he was a teen and his dick is fucking beautiful. Mikey can't help himself but imagine how much better this scene could get if he had Maya here, bent over the counter while he thrusts into her rather than his hand. He can imagine her flushed cheeks and watery eyes as he gets her to look into the mirror and show her just how pretty she looks. Mikey wanted to see it. He wanted to see how pretty she looked. He wanted to watch her eyes roll back, her hair stick to her skin due to the sweat, her hands desperately grabbing on the counter— he wanted to hear her breathy moans and helpless whimpers. "o-oh~"

When he first heard the confession from Maya's mouth the other day, he couldn't believe it— Chifuyu took her virginity but he rejected her. How? God, had he been Chifuyu he would have taken Maya and kept her all to himself. To make things worse they got drunk and then he took her virginity? That was even more absurd because there was not a single mark left on her skin. Her thighs were bare of any scratch, any bite and it's so absurd because if it had been him, Mikey would've marked her up. He would have hickeys on her throat and left marks of his teeth on her inner thighs. He would have left her memories of the night on her skin. Mikey would've made Maya feel real special in more ways than one. Instead, Chifuyu was a little bitch and lost the most gorgeous girl ever— and holy fuck those sounds she makes. "f-f-fuck" he lets out a small whimper as he comes undone all over his hand and abs just at the memory of the noises she was making with Izana the other day

The sight of watching himself come and hearing his own noises makes him come even harder. He breathes heavily, using his free hand to just take off his shirt so he doesn't stain it and he throws it to the floor. Mikey decides he might as well shower now. He washes his hands and fully strips then gets into the shower. As the steam from the shower dissipated into the air, Mikey's thoughts swirled with a heady mix of desire and arrogance. Maya's image lingered in his mind like a tantalizing puzzle waiting to be solved, her presence igniting a fire within him that he couldn't quite quench. With each passing moment, his obsession with her only seemed to grow, fueling his ego and stoking the flames of his narcissism.

poor girl.

The words echoed in his mind, a testament to the empathy he felt for Maya's plight. But beneath the guise of sympathy lay something deeper, something darker—a growing obsession that he couldn't quite shake. He found himself fixating on her, her image etched into his mind like a permanent imprint. Mikey hadn't bothered to inquire about Maya's past, too consumed by his own thoughts and desires to delve into the depths of her suffering. His admiration for her resilience mingled with a twisted fascination, a desire to unravel the mysteries that surrounded her. He couldn't help but wonder what secrets lay hidden behind her eyes, what demons lurked beneath the surface of her stoic facade. As the warm water washed over him, Mikey's mind wandered to the possibilities that awaited him in Maya's world. He was drawn to her like a moth to a flame, unable to resist the allure of her enigmatic presence. With a heavy sigh, Mikey stepped out of the shower, his thoughts consumed by visions of Maya. Maya had ignited a fire within him, a hunger that burned with an intensity that he couldn't ignore. "Want her to be mine" Mikey mutters to himself as he dries off his body with the towel and then dries his hair

As Mikey's thoughts continued to swirl with visions of Maya, a burning desire ignited within him—a desire for reciprocation. He couldn't shake the craving for Maya's affection, the yearning for her to want him back with the same fervour that consumed him. In his mind, it wasn't enough for him to simply possess her; he wanted her heart, her soul, her every thought to be consumed by him. The idea of Maya pining for him, longing for his touch, sent a thrill coursing through Mikey's veins. He couldn't help but imagine the rush of satisfaction that would wash over him when she finally succumbed to his charms when she surrendered herself to him completely. It was a heady thought—one that fueled his ego and spurred him on in his pursuit of her. "Mikey" Sanzu was knocking on the bathroom door "there's a call for you"

Mikey sighs as his childhood friend interrupts his fantasizing. It was probably karma for all the times he had cockblocked Izana this week. "Just a second, Haru" Mikey says and wraps the towel around his waist and unlocks the door and steps out

Sanzu stands in front of him looking annoyed. "Matsuno's calling" he holds up the burner phone that was currently ringing

Mikey narrows his eyes. He had given one to each of the former captains and vice-captains after they left Toman. No one has ever used it to call him. For the first time in years, someone was calling. "huh... talk to him" Mikey says and walks into the guest room taking a seat on the bed

Sanzu answers the call. They had a short conversation and then Sanzu sighed in annoyance and said "Mikey he wants to talk to you"

Mikey just holds out his hand for the phone and Sanzu gives it to him. "hello?" Mikey keeps his tone low and nonchalant

"Hey, Mikey-kun... It's me Chifuyu. I know it's been a while but I really need your help"

Maya fumbled with the bobby pins, her fingers trembling with a mix of determination and desperation, she couldn't shake the nagging feeling of futility that gnawed at her insides. The drugs Izana had given her had left her in a haze, her movements sluggish and her mind clouded with confusion. These weren't the usual drugs Izana administered to her; they were potent substances that sent her spiralling into a state of euphoria and disorientation. The drugs had rendered her movements sluggish and her mind sluggish, making it nearly impossible for her to muster the clarity of thought needed to pick the lock. Trapped in a fog of intoxication, Maya's thoughts swirled incoherently, her senses dulled by the overpowering effects of the drugs. It was as if she were floating on a cloud, disconnected from the world around her and adrift in a sea of uncertainty. "Well, well, well," Izana purred, his voice dripping with thinly veiled amusement. "What do we have here? Little bunny still trying to hop away?"

It's Monday again. It's been a whole 7 days since the worst day of her life when Chifuyu told her it was a mistake sleeping with her and Izana kidnapping her after an unfair game of cat and mouse. Oh man was she exhausted of trying to escape every day at any moment she got. Her knees were bruised from all the crawling to the double doors and kneeling in front of the lock to pick it and the view of the beach through the glass was just mocking her at this point. As Izana's voice pierced through the fog of Maya's drug-induced haze, she couldn't help but feel a wave of exhaustion wash over her. As Izana strolled over and dragged a chair beside Maya, a mocking grin crept across his lips, sending a chill down her spine. She remained kneeling on the floor, her muscles tense with apprehension as she anticipated his next move. "You know, bunny," Izana began, his voice laced with mockery "I can't help but wonder what drives you to keep fighting for something so futile. Here I am, offering you everything on a silver platter—food, shelter, a picturesque view of the beach—and yet you still yearn for something more."

As Izana lounged back in his chair, a self-satisfied smirk playing on his lips, Maya struggled to focus through the haze of drugs clouding her mind. Her limbs felt heavy and her thoughts sluggish, making it difficult to muster the strength to resist his taunts. "it's a little ungrateful, don't you think?" He continues

As Izana leaned forward, his movements smooth yet purposeful, Maya's hazy mind struggled to comprehend his proximity. She felt his hands reaching out, their touch rough and calloused as they gently cradled her face. A shiver ran down her spine at the unexpected sensation, her senses overwhelmed by the contrast between the softness of his touch and the hardness of his hands. "You're such a feisty little thing, aren't you, little bunny?" Izana murmured, his voice low and hypnotic as he traced his fingers along the contours of her cheeks

Maya's eyelids fluttered as she fought to stay focused, her senses dulled by the intoxicating mix of drugs and Izana's proximity. Izana's gaze bore into hers, his eyes burning with an intensity that made her breath catch in her throat. "You have such fire in you," he continued, his voice laced with a mixture of admiration and amusement. "It's almost... intoxicating."

Maya's heart pounded erratically in her chest, her thoughts spinning as she struggled to make sense of the conflicting emotions swirling within her. Part of her recoiled at Izana's words, repulsed by the thought of being under his control. But another part, a small voice buried deep within her subconscious, whispered tantalizingly of the allure of surrender. She stares up at him from where she's kneeling on the floor, not realizing he had shifted the chair in a way that she was now knelt between his legs, his feet on either side of her thighs. As Izana's grip tightened on her face, Maya's resolve wavered, torn between the desire to resist and the temptation to succumb. "Izana..." her voice comes out slightly slurred

There was a predatory gleam in his gaze, a hunger that seemed to devour her very soul as he studied her with unsettling fascination. Maya felt a chill run down her spine as she met his gaze, her heart pounding in her chest as she struggled to decipher the emotions swirling in his eyes. There was something unsettlingly possessive in the way Izana looked at her as if she were nothing more than a prized possession to be toyed with at his whim. His gaze seemed to strip away the layers of her defences, leaving her feeling exposed and vulnerable beneath his penetrating stare. It was as if he could see right through her, peeling back the mask she wore to reveal the raw, unfiltered truth that lay beneath. "got such a pretty mouth" Izana murmured, his thumb rubbing against her slightly parted lips

As Maya sank deeper into the haze of drugs and desire, a sense of euphoria washed over her, drowning out the nagging voice of reason that had been her constant companion. Every touch, every caress from Izana sent a jolt of electricity coursing through her veins, igniting a fire that burned with a feverish intensity. His hands roamed her skin with a possessive fervour, leaving a trail of heat in their wake as they traced the contours of her body. "so pretty" he whispered again and his thumb slipped between her lips into her mouth

She could taste the saltiness of his skin, feel the calluses rough against her tongue, and yet she found herself welcoming the intrusion with a desperate hunger. "hey little bunny" Izana mumbled, his thumb pressing down lightly on her tongue

Maya watches as Izana puts a hand on his belt buckle and through her drug-hazed mind she finds a bit of her common sense and and pulls her mouth away from his thumb. "I... I've never..."

Izana holds her chin again and stops himself from unbuckling his belt. "you've never given a guy head?"

She hates how casually he says it. Izana then laughs. "oh yeah I forgot you were a little virgin until what? 7 days ago?" He murmurs and oh she suddenly feels like shit again "Don't worry bunny, I'll show you how. We'll have a little trial run"

Maya is as high as the clouds. Her limbs aren't listening to her and she can't help herself right now. So when Izana so sweetly, his tone a little mocking, tells her to open her mouth for him, she can't help but part her lips. Izana sighs and without warning slides two of his fingers into her mouth. As his fingers slid into her mouth, Maya's senses were inundated with a dizzying array of sensations. The taste of his skin, slightly salty and musky, danced across her tongue, sending a shiver down her spine. The rough calluses on his fingers grazed against the delicate flesh of her mouth, a stark contrast to the softness of his touch. "suck" he whispers

Her heart pounded in her chest as she sucked gently on his fingers, her lips forming a tight seal around them as she surrendered herself to the pleasure of the moment. As Izana's fingers lingered in her mouth, Maya closed her eyes and allowed herself to be carried away by the currents of pleasure, her body humming with anticipation of what was to come. "there we go, relax your throat" Izana murmured as he slides his long fingers all the way in as she gags a bit on his middle and index finger

The gold ring on his middle finger scrapes against her teeth and she could taste the metal on her tongue. The drugs that Izana had administered had enveloped her in a fog of euphoria, blurring the lines between reality and fantasy. Yet, beneath the surface, a storm of conflicting emotions raged within her. On one hand, Maya couldn't deny the intoxicating allure of Izana's touch, the way his fingers ignited a firestorm of sensation within her. It was as if he held the key to a realm of pleasure that she had never known existed, and she was powerless to resist its pull. "no teeth 'kay. Just your tongue and your lips" he guides, sounding sweet and encouraging with a heavy condescending undertone

Slowly, he starts to move his fingers in and out of her mouth but not all the way pulling them out. His ring scrapes against her lips with each thrust of his fingers and she gags a little every time they hit the back of her throat. Mingled with the ecstasy was a gnawing sense of unease, a voice of reason that whispered warnings of the dangers that lay ahead. Maya knew all too well the depths of Izana's depravity, the darkness that lurked beneath his charming facade. And yet, despite the rational part of her mind screaming for her to flee, she found herself drawn inexorably closer to him, unable to resist the magnetic pull of his presence. "there we go... Look up at me"

Maya's eyes flutter open and she tilts her gaze up to look at him. Izana was looking down at her with dark eyes. Something twists in her stomach. In that moment, Maya was caught between two worlds: the world of reason and caution, and the world of passion and desire. It was a precarious balance, one that threatened to tip at any moment, plunging her into the abyss of uncertainty. But for now, as Izana's fingers lingered in her mouth and the world around them faded into insignificance, Maya surrendered herself to the intoxicating rhythm of their embrace, her heart pounding with a mixture of fear and longing. There was a thrill to this. Maybe that's what she liked.

Maya liked the thrill.

She liked how this whole thing was straight out of a dark romance novel.

She liked—

Maya liked how easy it was to pretend there was nothing inherently wrong with this whole situation. In that moment, Maya surrendered herself completely to the allure of the forbidden, her heart pounding with a mixture of fear and longing. There was a twisted beauty in their embrace, a dark romance that defied logic and reason. And as the world around them faded into insignificance, Maya allowed herself to be consumed by the darkness, revelling in the thrill of the forbidden. It feels like that only goes on for a few minutes but her throat already feels a little achy and it was just his fingers. "awe you're a natural" Izana coos then pulls his fingers out of her mouth

She's left with the taste of metal on her tongue from his gold ring and a light ache at the back of her throat. Maya hasn't gotten any sober, the drugs still swirling in her system. "Such a shame," Izana remarked casually, his tone dripping with feigned sympathy as he watched Maya with a predatory gleam in his eyes. "I was hoping you'd put up more of a fight. But I suppose you can't help but crave my touch, can you, little bunny?"

Maya's cheeks flushed with embarrassment at his words, a mix of shame and frustration swirling within her as she struggled to make sense of the conflicting emotions that warred within her. She knew she should be repulsed by Izana's manipulation, should despise the hold he had over her. But despite her best efforts to resist, a part of her couldn't deny the twisted thrill she felt at being under his control. As Izana leaned in closer, his words dripping with temptation, a sudden interruption shattered the charged atmosphere of the room. The door creaked open, and in strode Mikey, his presence a jarring intrusion on the intimate moment between Izana and Maya. "Aniki, where the hell are my socks?" he demanded, his voice brimming with impatience as he eyed Izana with a mixture of annoyance and disdain.

Izana's expression darkened, his irritation palpable as he tore his gaze away from Maya to glare at his younger brother. "Can't you see I'm busy, Manjiro?" he snapped, his tone laced with veiled annoyance

Mikey merely shrugged, unfazed by Izana's obvious irritation. "I don't care if you're busy or not," he retorted, his tone bordering on insolent "I need my socks, and you're the one who always moves them"

aya's cheeks burned with embarrassment as Mikey's eyes flickered over her and Izana's compromising position. She could feel the weight of his gaze lingering on her, his scrutiny like a spotlight that illuminated every awkward detail of their interaction. Despite her best efforts to maintain her composure, Maya couldn't help but feel a wave of self-consciousness wash over her, her cheeks flushing crimson as she shifted uncomfortably under Mikey's scrutiny. Izana's irritation seemed to intensify at Mikey's continued presence, his jaw clenching with barely restrained frustration. "You do this every fucking time" he muttered, his tone clipped as he stood up and walked over to a nearby drawer and tossed a pair of socks in Mikey's direction. "Here, take them and get out."

Mikey caught the socks with a smirk, his eyes flickering briefly to Maya before turning back to Izana. "Thanks, Aniki," he said, his tone tinged with a hint of mockery as he sauntered out of the room, leaving Maya and Izana alone once more

Izana looks over at Maya who was still on the floor and he groans in frustration, running tan fingers through white hair. "that fuckin' cockblock ruined my mood"

Izana's gaze bore into Maya, his expression unreadable as he scrutinized her. "Can you get up by yourself?" he asked, his voice laced with impatience.

Maya's heart sank as the weight of his words settled over her like a suffocating blanket. She struggled to push herself up from the floor, her limbs heavy and unresponsive. Each movement felt like a monumental effort as if she were wading through molasses, her muscles protesting with every strained motion. With a grunt of exertion, Maya managed to prop herself up on her elbows, her breath coming in ragged gasps. She glanced up at Izana, her eyes pleading for mercy. "I... I don't know," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper

The drugs still held her in their grasp, clouding her thoughts and sapping her strength. Izana's lips curled into a snarky smile as he watched Maya struggle. "Pathetic," he muttered under his breath, his tone dripping with disdain "Kakucho!"

Seconds later, the door creaked open, and Kakucho entered the room, his imposing figure casting a shadow over Maya's prone form. His expression was inscrutable as he surveyed the scene, his eyes flickering briefly to Izana before settling on Maya. "Izana, what do you need?" Kakucho asked, his voice low and gravelly

Izana gestured towards Maya with a nonchalant wave of his hand. "Help her up," he ordered, his tone casual yet tinged with a hint of malice.

Without a word, Kakucho moved towards Maya, his steps deliberate and purposeful. In one swift motion, he scooped her up into his arms, cradling her against his chest in a bridal hold like she weighed nothing. Maya's breath caught in her throat as she found herself enveloped in Kakucho's arms, his touch both firm and surprisingly gentle. Despite her predicament, a flicker of warmth stirred within her at the unexpected tenderness in his actions. As he approached the master bed, he lowered her gently onto the soft mattress, his touch surprisingly tender as he arranged her in a comfortable position. The room fell into an uneasy silence, broken only by the sound of their breathing mingling in the air. "Make sure she doesn't try anything funny again," Izana instructed, his voice tinged with a dangerous edge. "We can't have our little bunny hopping away, now can we?"

Kakucho's expression remained impassive as he nodded in response to Izana's command, his eyes betraying no hint of emotion as he cast a final glance in Maya's direction. "Also find out where the fuck she keeps getting those stupid hair pins from. Did you say you took them all away?" Izana says in annoyance as he sits on the bed next to her legs

"She hid a bunch in her hair last time" Kakucho says and Maya now wants to cuss him out

This motherfucker. "That's smart" Izana says with a grin and scoots closer to her

She flinches a little. Maya's heart raced as Izana drew nearer, his proximity sending a shiver down her spine. She fought the urge to recoil, her muscles tensing with every inch he closed the distance between them. The weight of his gaze bore down on her, suffocating her with its intensity as he leaned in closer, his breath hot against her skin. "Smart indeed," Izana murmured, his voice sending a chill down Maya's spine. "But not smart enough to outwit me, it seems."

His fingers tangled in her hair felt oddly comforting, a fleeting moment of intimacy in the midst of chaos. She couldn't help but marvel at the sensation of Izana's touch, the rough callouses of his fingertips grazing against her scalp. The fear of captivity mingling with a sense of unexpected pleasure was a strange comparison. As Izana's hand combed through her curls, Maya found herself strangely captivated by the feeling, a small part of her relishing the sensation of his fingers threading through her locks. Finally, Izana's fingers closed around something hidden within Maya's hair, and a triumphant smirk crossed his lips. "Gotcha," he muttered, his voice laced with a mixture of satisfaction and amusement. "Looks like you're not as clever as you thought, little bunny."

Izana pulled out the last bobby pin she had in her grasp. He takes it and now she's got nothing to pick the lock with. Maybe she could go through her makeup bag later to see if she had more but she doubts it. Maya had nothing to pick the lock with. She had to come up with another plan. Kakucho leaves the room not long after, taking the bobby pin away with him and Maya feels hopeless. Izana is still here. He had an unknown look in his eyes. "Why are you doing this to me?" She asks

Izana's lips curled into a wicked smirk, his gaze piercing as he regarded Maya with a mixture of amusement and malice. "Why, my dear little bunny, because it's entertaining," he replied, his voice dripping with a twisted sense of satisfaction "You provide me with endless entertainment with your feeble attempts to escape."

Maya's stomach churned at his callous words, a surge of anger rising within her at the sheer audacity of his response. "This isn't a game," she retorted, her voice trembling with a mixture of fear and defiance "You're holding me captive against my will. You're torturing me."

Izana's smirk widened into a grin, his eyes gleaming with a malevolent glint. "And yet, here you are, still fighting," he observed, his tone laced with thinly veiled admiration. "You've got spunk, I'll give you that."

Maya's jaw clenched, her fists balling up at her sides as she fought to suppress the overwhelming sense of despair that threatened to consume her. "Is this about the medication? The stupid IV bag?" 

Maya doesn't know how Kakucho convinced Izana to stop giving that awful shit to her but she's most thankful to him for it. "Yes and no" Izana answers 

Kakucho had told her what happened and why they killed the hospital director and the other doctor and the two nurses. The hospital director had gotten herself involved in drugs and hadn't been able to pay back the money she owed Tokyo Manji Gang. So, she had to sell her body for it and eventually met her demise. The hospital director was exacting his revenge on the gang by making Maya give Izana the wrong medication for a whole month on purpose. Maya had no idea about any of it. A knot of guilt twisted in her stomach as she grappled with the weight of his revelation. She had been unwittingly caught in the crossfire of a vendetta she knew nothing about, her life manipulated and endangered by forces beyond her control. "I didn't know," she whispered, her voice barely above a hoarse whisper "I had no idea."

Izana's gaze softened slightly, a hint of sympathy flickering in his eyes as he regarded Maya with a mixture of pity and contempt. "Ignorance is no excuse," he replied, his tone tinged with bitterness "But it seems Kakucho has taken a liking to you which is why I didn't kill you that night at the hospital with the stupid director and the other doctor"

Kakucho's unexpected intervention had spared her from a fate she couldn't bear to contemplate, yet the reason behind his mercy remained a mystery to her. "Why would he do that?" she ventured, her voice barely above a whisper, her eyes searching Izana's face for any hint of an answer.

Izana's lips curled into a sardonic smile, the corners of his mouth twisting with a hint of amusement. "Who knows?" he replied cryptically, his gaze drifting away from Maya's probing stare. "Perhaps he sees something in you that I don't."

Izana chuckled softly, the sound laced with a touch of derision. "Kakucho has always been soft on women," he remarked, his voice tinged with a hint of contempt. "He sees them as fragile creatures in need of protection, even when they're nothing more than liabilities."

"Then what do you see me as?" Maya asks him

"You're a means to an end, a tool to be used and discarded as I see fit." Izana continued, his voice dripping with a mixture of amusement and malice

Maya's breath caught in her throat, a wave of despair washing over her as she realized the depth of Izana's manipulation. She had been nothing more than a pawn in his twisted game, her life manipulated and controlled by forces beyond her comprehension. "And what end is that?" Maya asked, her voice barely above a whisper as she braced herself for Izana's response.

Izana's lips curled into a sinister grin, his eyes gleaming with a malevolent light. "The end," he replied cryptically, "is whatever I desire it to be."

A while later, Kakucho and Sanzu come in accompanied by a man and they use dental impressions to take an imprint of her teeth. What do they need it for? Maya didn't think she'd like the answer so she didn't ask. 

Mikey can hear it as he stands outside the master bedroom. She's crying. He looks at his phone and sees the time show 5 pm. With a shallow breath, he decided to enter the room, his curiosity and fixation overpowering any genuine concern for Maya's well-being. As he stepped inside, he found her curled up on the bed, tears streaming down her face. The sight should have evoked empathy, but instead, it fueled his infatuation even further. "Maya?" Mikey called out, his voice laced with an unsettling mixture of intrigue and possessiveness

He approached her with a predatory grace, his eyes gleaming with an intense fixation as he observed her distress. She was curled up in his bed, on his pillow. He knelt beside her, not out of genuine care, but out of a selfish desire to be close to her. "Hey," he said softly, his words tinged with a hint of impatience. "Do you have a hair tie? I need one." 

His touch was light, but there was an underlying intensity in his gaze, a hunger that betrayed his true intentions. Maya quickly wiped her tears as Mikey approached, his presence both unsettling and strangely magnetic. She nodded in response to his request, her voice wavering slightly as she spoke. "Y-yeah, there's one in my makeup bag," she managed to say, gesturing towards the washroom with a trembling hand

Her pupils weren't dilated. She was completely sober right now. Perhaps the effects of the drugs went down. Mikey goes into the bathroom and sees a medium-sized baby pink makeup bag on the counter. He didn't just wanna take one and leave so Mikey looked into the mirror, ruffled his hair to make it more messy and picked up the makeup bag. As Mikey emerged from the washroom, he held Maya's makeup bag in his hands, a look of slight confusion crossing his features. Placing it gently in front of her, he shook his head in dismay. "I couldn't find one," he admitted, his voice tinged with frustration

As Maya unzipped her makeup bag, her fingers fumbled slightly in their haste to retrieve what Mikey needed. With a quick search, she managed to find a hair tie nestled among the assorted cosmetics and accessories. Holding it out to him with a small smile, she said, "Here you go."

Mikey accepted the hair tie with a grateful nod, his eyes lighting up with appreciation. "Thanks," he said, a hint of relief in his voice.

But before Maya could respond, Mikey surprised her by asking, "Hey, do you mind tying my hair back for me?"

Taken aback by the unexpected request, Maya hesitated for a moment before nodding. "Sure," she replied softly

Mikey sits on the bed with his back to her. He feels the bed shift behind her and she gets up on her knees. With practiced ease, she gathered his hair in her gentle fingers, her touch delicate yet sure as she skillfully secured it in a tidy ponytail. Despite her efforts, some of his messy bangs stubbornly escaped the tie, but Mikey didn't mind. "Done" she murmurs after tying his hair

"Thanks" Mikey says, shifting himself around to face her

Maya is sitting with her back against the headboard. Her cheeks were a little red, her eyes bloodshot from crying and her lips a little bruised. Yet, even with her dishevelled appearance, there was an undeniable beauty about her, accentuated by the bruised tint of her lips. Mikey found himself captivated by her, his admiration evident in the way he looked at her. Mikey's gaze wandered to Maya's makeup bag, partially unzipped beside them. He reached out and grabbed a bottle of nail polish, examining it curiously. "What's this?" he asked, holding up the bottle for Maya to see.

Maya's eyes flickered to the nail polish, a faint smile tugging at the corners of her lips. It's the first time he's seen her smile. "Oh, that's just nail polish" she replied, her voice soft

Mikey's eyes flicked over the assortment of nail polish bottles in Maya's makeup bag, his curiosity piqued. "Hey, can you paint my nails?" he asked, his tone casual yet intrigued.

Maya blinked in surprise at his request. "O-Oh... Yeah why not" She says "Pick a colour"

Mikey considered for a moment before pointing to a bottle of black nail polish. "This one," he said decisively, handing Maya the bottle

Maya nodded, uncapping the nail polish and carefully applying it to Mikey's nails. Something was mesmerizing about the way her slender fingers moved with practiced precision, uncapping the bottle and expertly swirling the applicator brush within its depths.

As Maya began to paint his nails, Mikey found himself captivated by the fluid grace of her movements. Each stroke was deliberate and controlled, her touch gentle yet confident as she expertly coated his nails in black. Mikey couldn't help but notice the stark contrast between Maya's delicate hands and his own rough, calloused ones as she carefully selected a bottle of deep blue nail polish from her makeup bag. Her fingers were slender and graceful, a stark contrast to his own, which were marred by bruises and scars from years of fighting and violence. As Maya began to paint his nails, Mikey found himself mesmerized by the gentle touch of her soft hands against his own. Her movements were precise and controlled, each stroke of the nail polish brush leaving behind a trail of dark colour that stood out against the backdrop of his weathered skin. Despite the pain and hardship he had endured, there was something undeniably comforting about the feeling of Maya's hands on his own. They were smaller and softer than his own, yet they exuded a quiet strength and resilience that left him in awe. "Done" Maya says, closing the bottle and putting it back in her makeup bag "Blow on them so they dry faster"

Mikey brings his hands up closer to his face and blows at his nails. This was odd. He wasn't too sure why he asked her to paint his nails. He remembers back when Emma was still alive she'd sometimes convince him to let her paint his nails and... Mikey's expression pales at the thought of his dead little sister. As Mikey's mind drifted back to memories of his sister Emma, a wave of sorrow washed over him, mingling with the bittersweet nostalgia of days gone by. He could still picture her infectious smile, the way her laughter filled the room with warmth and light. But now, all that remained were the echoes of her laughter, haunting him like a ghost from the past. Maya's voice cut through his reverie, bringing him back to the present moment. "Are you okay?" she asked, her voice laced with concern as she regarded him with searching eyes.

Mikey forced a tight-lipped smile, masking the turmoil swirling within him. "Yeah, I'm fine," he replied, his tone clipped and dismissive

As the nail polish dried on his fingers, Mikey's mind drifted back to Maya, away from Emma. He couldn't shake the feeling of exhilaration that surged through him whenever he was near her. It was a sensation unlike anything he had ever experienced before, a heady mix of desire and obsession that consumed him from the inside out. "they're dry" Mikey tells her

Maya looks at them and nods. She's not really looking right at him. She's looking at the view behind him— at the beach visible through the glass double doors. Mikey cocks his head to the side and asks "Do you wanna go for a swim?"

Mikey watched Maya's hesitant response, her uncertainty palpable in the air between them. He couldn't help but feel a surge of frustration mingled with disappointment. Why was she always so hesitant, so unwilling to embrace the opportunities he offered her? Didn't she understand how much he wanted her to be by his side, to share in the experiences that made life worth living? With a tentative smile, she finally nodded. "Yes, I'd love to go for a swim," she replied, her voice tinged with a hint of uncertainty. "But I don't have a swimsuit."

As Maya's uncertainty hung in the air, Mikey's thoughts churned with determination. He wouldn't let a mere swimsuit deter him from his plans. There was a flicker of excitement in his eyes as he contemplated the possibilities, relishing the challenge of finding a solution to Maya's dilemma. He'd make it happen, one way or another. "whatever that's fine" He says "Panties and bra are the same thing as a bikini, is it not? Just wear that"

Maya's brows furrowed in hesitation, a mixture of surprise and disbelief flashing across her features. She opened her mouth to protest, but the words caught in her throat as she met Mikey's intense gaze. "Okay," she murmured, her voice barely audible, "I guess that works."

A grin tugged at the corners of Mikey's lips as he relished his victory. The thought of her in nothing but her underwear sent a surge of heat coursing through his veins, igniting a fire that burned with a feverish intensity. He couldn't wait to see her, to touch her, to make her his in every sense of the word. Suppressing a smirk, Mikey nodded in response, his eyes alight with anticipation. "Great," he replied, his voice laced with a hint of satisfaction "Let's go then." With a sense of purpose, he rose from the bed, his mind already racing with the possibilities that lay ahead.

Mikey gets off the bed and holds out his hand to her. "c'mon"

She looks hesitant and nervous. He hopes she doesn't run. Mikey knows she's still a fairly fast runner under the influence of drugs but right now she was completely sober. He'd hate to have to shoot her down. "hm?" Mikey asks again

Maya looks down at his hand, up at his face, then at his hand again. 

She takes it.

They're standing in right in front of the water, toes in the warm sand and Maya is trying her absolute best not to stare right now as Mikey removes his shirt. Mikey's pale skin glowed softly under the warm sunlight, accentuating the definition of his toned, lean muscles. Every movement he made was fluid and precise, a testament to the hours spent honing his body to perfection. As he reached up to remove his shirt, the fabric clung to his sculpted torso before falling away, revealing the chiselled lines of his abdomen and the sinewy strength of his arms. His chest rose and fell with each steady breath, the rhythmic motion drawing Maya's gaze like a magnet. Maya couldn't help but admire the sight before her, the raw power and confidence radiating from Mikey's form. His physique was a testament to his dedication and discipline, a stark contrast to the chaos and uncertainty that surrounded them. Despite herself, Maya felt a surge of attraction stir within her, her heart fluttering in her chest as she struggled to tear her gaze away. As he turned his attention back to Maya, a faint smirk tugged at the corners of his lips, his eyes gleaming with a mixture of mischief and desire. "Ready to go for a swim?" he asked, his voice low and husky, sending a shiver down Maya's spine

She nodded in response, her cheeks flushing with a mixture of embarrassment and excitement. Mikey's already getting into the water, quickly going over to the deeper side, hip deep. Maya takes that moment to remove her shirt and then her cotton shorts, leaving her in just a bra and panties. Oh man was she grateful she was wearing a nice and matching set. It was baby pink with a little lace. Not too much where it would be considered lingerie but just enough where it looked cute. As Maya stepped into the water, the cool embrace of the waves enveloping her, she couldn't help but feel a surge of exhilaration coursing through her veins. The weight of her clothes had been shed, leaving her feeling light and free, the gentle caress of the water against her skin sending shivers of pleasure down her spine. As she waded deeper into the water, her heart pounding in her chest, Maya couldn't shake the feeling of being on the edge of something exhilarating and dangerous. The thrill of the unknown coursed through her veins, igniting a fire within her that she couldn't deny. With each step, the distance between them closed, until they were standing mere inches apart, the water swirling around them in a hypnotic dance. Maya could feel the heat of Mikey's body radiating against her skin, sending a shiver of anticipation down her spine. "Nice set," Mikey remarked, his voice low and husky, his eyes smoldering with desire "Very cute."

Maya's cheeks flushed with a mixture of embarrassment and excitement, a shy smile tugging at the corners of her lips. She felt a surge of confidence wash over her, buoyed by the knowledge that she had captured Mikey's attention, if only for a moment. With a playful glint in her eyes, Maya splashed Mikey with water, laughing as he recoiled with mock anger. The tension between them dissolved in a cascade of laughter and playful banter, leaving Maya feeling lighter and freer than she had in a long time. For a moment she forgets that Mikey is the leader of Tokyo Manji Gang and the younger brother of her sociopathic captor. 

Right now, as they splash water at each other, they're just Mikey and Maya.

The sun is setting around them and the water is no longer cold. The sky is lit up in shades of orange, yellow, pink and purple. It's gorgeous. With a mischievous glint in his eyes, Mikey pulled her towards the deeper waters, the cool embrace of the sea enveloping them as they waded further out. Maya's feet barely touched the sandy bottom, the water rising up to her shoulders as she struggled to maintain her balance. But Mikey was there, his strong arms steadying her as they navigated the shifting currents together. As they stood there, the water lapping at their skin, Maya couldn't help but feel a sense of peace wash over her. "c'mere lemme help ya'" Mikey says and held her waist

Without warning she's lifted off her feet with ease, the water making her body essentially weightless. "put your legs around my waist" He tells her

With a slight nod, Maya wrapped her legs around Mikey's waist, her pulse quickening as she felt the warmth of his body against hers. It was an intimate gesture, one that sent a jolt of electricity coursing through her veins. Despite the lingering doubts and fears that gnawed at the edges of her mind, in this moment, all that mattered was the exhilarating rush of being held in Mikey's arms. Maya rests her hands on Mikey's shoulders as she looks at his face lit up by the sun setting next to them. He had long pulled the hair tie out of his hair, the long and short strands now sticking to his wet skin like her own hair was. Without thinking she carefully brushes his wet bangs away from his forehead. She stares. Maya can't help it. After a whole week of torture, there was someone finally treating her with kindness. She can't help but whisper "You're beautiful"

Mikey just smiles at the compliment. Their skin is lit up in shades of yellow and orange and Maya feels breathless. She wants to kiss him. Fuck it was a stupid thought considering just who Mikey was but she couldn't help it. Her legs tighten around his waist and his smile gets wider, holding her waist tight in return. Hesitantly, Maya wraps her arms around his neck. The water slouches around them, small waves crashing against their shoulders before making their way to shore. Maya doesn't think she's ever felt like this before. Mikey's smile gets a little softer when he sees her looking at his lips. Maya can't help it. She leans in but Mikey pulls his head back. Her eyes widen in surprise and embarrassment. "O-Oh sorry—"

She goes to apologize and pull herself out of his grasp but Mikey just holds onto her tighter, one of his hands sliding down her waist to thigh, giving it a squeeze. "You gotta ask for what you want, baby" He murmurs, voice sounding low and just as soothing as the waves crashing against the shore

baby baby baby baby baby

The word echoes in her head. Suddenly her body feels too hot and the water is no longer cold enough. "I... I..." Maya isn't able to get her words out

But Mikey just leans his face in closer and holds her even tighter against him till their chests are pressed together. Maya wonders if Mikey can feel her heart beating. "It's 'kay, baby... I won't deny you of what you want" his hand on her thigh comes up to her face and brushes a wet strand of her hair off her cheek "You just gotta use your words and ask"

Her stomach should not have dropped as low as his voice. He sounds sweet yet authoritative and it's doing something bad to her heart. She can't help it. There is not a thought of Chifuyu in her head right now. Just:

Mikey Mikey Mikey Mikey Mikey Mikey Mikey Mikey

"I..." She sucks in a short breath "Wanna kiss you"

Mikey smiles. It's all soft and sweet. "see that wasn't so hard"

He leans in and kisses her. 

As Mikey's lips met hers in a tender embrace, Maya's world seemed to shift on its axis, every nerve in her body tingling with a surge of electric energy. Maya's heart pounded in her chest, a steady rhythm that echoed the pounding of the waves against the shore, as she surrendered herself to the irresistible pull of Mikey's embrace. In that fleeting instant, as their lips met in a fervent embrace, Maya felt a sense of euphoria wash over her, a feeling of completeness that she had never known before. Mikey's kiss was gentle yet filled with raw intensity, sending a jolt of electricity coursing through Maya's veins. His lips moved with a practiced tenderness, caressing hers in a way that made her heart flutter with anticipation. Without warning his tongue slips into her mouth and the taste of... chocolate? fills her mouth. He licks along the back of her teeth before he pulls back just enough to say "Stick your tongue out f'me"

Maya does as he says and instantly his lips wrap around her tongue and he sucks at it. Maya thinks her head just exploded. She moans into his mouth and her fingers tangle in his wet locks. In return, the tips of Mikey's fingers dig into her waist. She wants more and more and more. Maya doesn't think she's ever felt this damn greedy in her life. They kiss for, however long. It's messy and raw, saliva running down their chins, and now her mouth is filled with chocolate taste. Neither of them wants to pull away but their lungs burn with the need for air. They pull away just enough and a string of saliva connects their lips together. It feels good. Everything feels good. Even better she's sober so she'll remember this feeling later. "Let's go inside hm?" Mikey says breathlessly "It's getting late"

Maya nods but reluctantly lets her legs unwrap from his waist. He leads her back to shore and picks their clothes off the now-cold sand. Mikey holds her hand the entire time as they walk up the deck and back into the beach house. Two towels are already neatly folded on the bed for them. Mikey takes one and gives it to her. As they're drying themselves off, they can't help it. Neither of them can. It's weird. Maya's never felt like this before. She doesn't know what to do with all this built-up desire inside of her so when Mikey takes her towel and lays it on the bed and lowers her onto it, she lets him; when he kisses her again, she lets him; when he unclips her bra, she lets him; when he pulls her panties off, she lets him. "look at chu'" He coos sweet, his thumb brush over her already hard nipple, a small gasp leaving her lips "what a pretty thing"

What made the moment even better was that he was looking at her eyes and not her body. "Can I make you feel good, baby?" Mikey asks, his forehead pressing against her's while his fingers brush over her pelvic bone

She nods but he doesn't go any further. Instead, he says "You've gotta use your words"

So shakily Maya whispers "Yes"

Mikey's fingers trail down and collect her slick on his fingers. Her legs are hooked over his thighs and he's moved back, kind of sitting up so he could see her. His thumb lightly rubs against her clit and she's already seeing stars. "so wet f'me already" he murmurs then spreads her lips apart and looks at her cunt in a way that was filled in admiration "You're so pretty here too baby"

Maya's cheeks flush at his words. "Mikey" she mumbles in embarrassment 

"shh" He hushes then gets to work

He starts with one finger and then gradually adds a second. Mikey comes up to kiss Maya while his fingers work inside her. "So tight, hm... Gonna need a lot of work before I could even fit" He whispers between kisses

Maya barely hears him. She's too overwhelmed with all the pleasurable sensations in her body. Her hands come up to grasp at his shoulders, digging her nails into his pale skin. Mikey starts pressing kisses to her neck, letting his teeth graze over her jaw. Maya's eyes roll back as a coil tightens in her lower belly. "f-fuck 'm gonna—"

"ask for it" He whispers into her ear "ask me if you can"

Maya whimpers helplessly as Mikey's fingers move faster inside her and thumb rubs little figure 8s on her clit. "a-ah wa-wanna come... please" she half sobs

She feels Mikey smile against the fold of her ear then whisper "come"

and without warning, she comes all over his fingers. But he doesn't stop after that. Mikey slows down the pace of his fingers but doesn't stop yet. It becomes slightly painful and she whines. "W-wait Mikey"

"Shhh" he just hushes her and keeps going

Soon it starts to feel good again and now he's sliding down her body. Maya feels his lips on her lower belly, sucking bruises into her skin there then moving to her hip bones and then to her inner thighs. During all that his fingers never stop. It felt so good. Her fingers desperately cling to the towel she is lying on as she whimpers out his name over and over like a prayer. His thumb suddenly moves off her clit and something warm envelopes it instead. Her breath gets stuck in her throat as Mikey sucks on her clit. "w-wait o-oh" Her eyes roll back as she comes again without warning

Maya is gasping out heavy uneven breaths when his fingers slide out of her and Mikey is lapping up at the mess she made, humming softly as he does. A shiver runs through her her. Finally, Mikey sits back up and removes his boxers and oh... It's fucking huge. Mikey sees her reaction and giggles. He fucking giggles. Maya watches as he moves closer again, hooking her legs over his thighs again and lays his hard cock on her stomach, almost as if measuring till where he'd reach. The tip is right against her navel and just the thought of how deep Mikey will reach makes her walls clench on nothing. "looks like it's gonna be a tight fit, hm" he says softly "Can you take it all f'me, baby?"

And just how could Maya say no when he was asking to fuck her into next week so sweetly?

Mikey lines himself up and slowly pushes the tip in. He's not even in all the way, barely actually, and it feels like too much already. "hands at your sides okay" He takes her hands off his shoulder and lays them on either side of her head "No touching me unless I say you can"

He sounds authoritative yet sweet at the same time and it does something to her. Inch by inch he's pushing into her and once he's all the way in, Mikey curses under his breath and presses a kiss to her forehead. "so fuckin' tight" 

He's got one hand holding her waist and the other next to her head, holding himself up over her. Maya on the other hand is trying to breathe. He's huge. Really fucking huge and it feels so good. He prepped her so well it barely even hurts. The stretch feels amazing and she feels full. Mikey pulls back from her but keeps himself buried to the hilt in her cunt. He looks down at where they're connected and groans. He presses a finger beneath her navel and murmurs "'m right here, feel it?"

Maya can't even respond. Her head is up in the clouds. It feels so good and even better when he starts moving his hips. He's slow at first then starts speeding up. The sound of skin slapping against skin fills the air, mixed with Mikey's groans and Maya's helpless whimpers and breathy moans. As her hands fly up to hold his shoulders again, Mikey grabs her wrists and pins them back down on either side of her head “Hey— I told you hands at your sides”

Maya weakly whimpers out apologies as her eyes roll back when he hits a particular spot. "f-fu-fuck 'm gonna..."

"ask for it baby... ask for it" Mikey encourages as his hips move at a faster pace and his thumb finds her sensitive clit again "won't ever deny you... all you gotta do is ask for it"

Maya's back arches off the bed. She's barely able to get her words out. Everything feels so good. Sparks of pleasure keep running through her and she feels so good. "w-wanna come... Please Mikey... wanna come" She moans out weakly, fingers clenching and nails digging into her palms

Mikey is pressing kisses to her collarbones now, muttering in a shaky voice "come"

With just a little more encouragement, Maya came for the third time that night. Mikey hasn't pulled out, neither has he come yet. Just as she's coming down from her high, Mikey flips their positions so now she's on top, straddling his hips and he's laying under her. Maya choked out a small sob at the change of position, feeling like he was even deeper inside of her now. "a-ah wa-wait Mikey" she whined, her hands on his abs to keep herself upright on top of him

Mikey holds her waist and sighs in satisfaction. "can do one more f'me too..." he wasn't really asking her but Maya wasn't complaining either as she started moving her hips at a slow shaky pace

She doesn't think she's doing this right but as Maya hears Mikey let out a moan, maybe she is. It feels good. Really fucking good but her thighs are burning and her cunt is pulsing from the overstimulation and oversensitivity. "sh-shit 'm close" Mikey says digging his fingers into her waist "Gon' finish inside, yeah baby? I'll give—ah— you a pill in—hngg— the morning"

Maya's too far gone to really comprehend what he's saying and she just nods frantically as she feels her own release coming again. Mikey gets her to lift her hips up and lean forward, her hands now resting on either side of his head. He grips his waist tight and starts thrusting up into her frantically, chasing after his release. Maya's eyes roll back and tears run down her cheeks. "fuck... I'll fill you up s'good" he groans, moving even faster "So fuckin pretty sh-shit~"

Maya comes first followed right by Mikey. Her body collapses onto his, whimpering weakly at the feeling of him coming inside. It felt warm and her brain felt like it had melted into a pile of mush in her skull. She feels warm and comfortable despite the oversensitivity. Maya is laying there on top of Mikey, her head on his chest and him still buried inside. His fingers caress along her spine and through her hair. "Hey baby, you still with me?" Mikey asks

Maya just hums. She can hear Mikey's heart thrumming where she lays on his chest. It's so comfortable here. She almost didn't wanna get up. But of course Mikey had different plans, he sits up slowly, still inside her and Maya lets out a small whimper. "c-can't again"

He hushes her and presses a kiss to her shoulder. "don't worry baby, won't make you go again... Let's just go get cleaned up"

Mikey slides out and they both hiss from the sensitivity. He carries her to the bathroom and they shower together. Mikey washes her hair and she does the same for him. Even as their wrapped in towels, Mikey helps Maya with her little skincare routine, calling it cute and lets Maya do the same steps with him. It sweet and domestic and Maya almost forgets where she is. No. She did forget where she was. There was not a thought of Izana or the torture she faced— her head was filled with Mikey and Mikey only. "you feel okay?" Mikey asks after she turns off the blow dryer "did I hurt you?"

She shakes her head no, but her eyes showing just how much he had exhausted her body. Once they're both dressed, Mikey lifts her up again and carries her back to his room. The master bedroom belonged to him after all. Maya couldn't help but notice the sheets were changed and their clothes were already picked up off the floor. It's dark out as Mikey tucks her into bed next to him and holds her body close. Maya doesn't think she's ever felt think good in a long time. She's tucked away in his arms, hidden under the blanket. Maya feels... safe.

for now at least.

But that's not what she's worried about. As she looks up at Mikey she can see something. She's only known him for a week but it looks like he hasn't felt more alive in years.

Maya feels the same.

[FEW HOURS EARLIER]

Izana taps his finger against the table. Korean mafia was annoying. He hated dealing with them but Kisaki said they would rather talk to someone who wasn't fully Japanese than some who is. Not that Izana really blames them. Sure he didn't really go to school but he isn't a stranger to the amount of war crimes committed by Japan against Korea. "Well Mr. Kurokawa, I think we have a deal" The Korean man in front of him says in English

Izana gives him his best business smile and hold out his hand. "It will be a pleasure working with you Mr Jeon" He answers back in the same language 

With the deal closed, Izana starts walking back to the car with Kakucho, Kisaki and Rindo. The y get in the car and Rindo starts to drive. Due to habit, Izana opens up the live CCTV footage of the beach house. He skims through it and his eyes narrow as he catches something on the feed. He watches Maya and Mikey play in ocean, splashing water at each other. Amusement fills him, his lips curled into a smirk. He observed them with a mixture of amusement and intrigue, noting the way they splashed water at each other, their laughter carried by the gentle breeze. For a moment, Izana's mind wandered back to his own memories of carefree days spent by the shore, before the weight of his responsibilities had burdened him. There was something oddly nostalgic about watching Maya and Mikey, their laughter echoing against the backdrop of the setting sun.

But as quickly as the sentimentality had surfaced, it was replaced by a calculating glint in Izana's eyes. He knew better than to let his guard down, especially when it came to Maya. There was a game to be played, and he intended to emerge victorious. With a satisfied smirk, he continued to watch the scene unfold on the screen, already formulating his next move.

[END SCENE]

"A body has been found near the docks of Yokohama pier in a car that was set to blaze. Police identify the body as newly graduated psychiatrist, Kaneko Maya, ruled as a suicide as a note was found on scene. Kaneko had been missing for the 2 and a half weeks and—"

Chifuyu chokes back his sobs and turns the news off. 

notes: omg this was the longest chapter I wrote so far. I hope the smut wasn't bad. this is like calm before the storm by the way. shit's gonna get real in the next chapter

next update is on monday

asks, likes and reblogs are very much appreciated &lt;3

special thanks to @kokonoiscoconut for helping with a few of the tags loll

taglist: @mysouleaten @yaya4thawin @piroporopo @reiners-milkbiddies @bontensbabygirl @tenjikusstuff4 @fairey555

[tiny-wooden-robot-fics]

Magnolia - Chapter One

Rating: Explicit Media: Jujutsu Kaisen Pairing(s): Geto Suguru x Original Female Character, Geto Suguru x Gojo Satoru, Geto Suguru x Gojo Satoru x Original Female Character Additional Tags: Vampire AU, Dark Themes, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Depression, Loneliness, Smut

A/N: More tags will be added as chapters are updated. Please be mindful of the tags and warnings at the beginning of each chapter, as they will tell you what you need to know about the content within.

Minors, DNI.

Summary:

Let me be loved for something, she prays to whomever or whatever might be listening. Let my last feeling be the one I've wanted for so long... to be needed, to be useful, to be happy in knowing I was finally doing something worthwhile.

Chapter Navigation 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17

Read on AO3

Chapter Warnings: Attempted suicide, blood

Chapter One: Where Dreams Go to Die

The cold has never bothered her much. 

Beaches were never her thing. While the people around her often looked forward to summertime with the goal of lounging in the sand and soaking up the warmth of the sun, she only ever wanted to hide from it.

The sun is too bright, too warm, too all-knowing and all-revealing. 

She hates it.

She looks instead toward the colder seasons. Chilly nights, gray skies, short days. They somehow make her feel more alive than the long days full of sun and warmth.

Alive. She wants to chuckle at the thought. 

The sky is gray now. Time sits on that thin precipice between sunset and night. Dusk, she remembers - it’s called dusk. But here in the middle of the woods, under the thick canopy of trees surrounding her, the dusk feels closer to night. 

Her hands are visibly shaking as she looks down at what’s in them. For all that she has tried her best to talk herself into feeling numb about this, her nerves have still managed to betray her. Well, she thinks bitterly, the corners of her eyes burning with unwanted moisture, is it really an important moment if I don’t find some way to fuck it up?

She really would rather be numb. 

Heaving a sigh, she sits right where she is. The dead leaves on the ground crunch under her bottom, disturbing the peace of the otherwise quiet forest. “To be useful,” she murmurs, her eyes on the slivers of sky she can see between the trees. “Will you let me become a part of you?” She ignores the trembling in her voice. “Will you let me do something useful for once in my life?” 

Let me be loved for something, she prays to whomever or whatever might be listening. Let my last feeling be the one I’ve wanted for so long… to be needed, to be useful, to be happy in knowing I was finally doing something worthwhile. 

She looks down at her hands again. The tremors have stopped. Steadily she shifts the blade from one hand to the other, doing what she’s set out to do. She isn’t numb to the pain, but she is finally numb to the feeling. 

She lays back and smiles. 

I measure every Grief I meet With narrow, probing eyes I wonder if it weighs like Mine Or has an Easier size. I wonder if They bore it long Or did it just begin I could not tell the Date of Mine It feels so old a pain… -Emily Dickinson, I Measure Every Grief I Meet

--

There’s something different about the woods tonight. 

It isn’t the sky. It sits above him the way it always does on early winter nights: dark and cold, the stars glittering yellow and white and reminding him of diamonds. 

It isn’t the trees. He has been here long enough to know nearly all of them, to become familiar with their rattles and creaks and groans. 

He can hear the sounds he’s used to: small animals rustling in the underbrush. The ones active during the day are settling down for the night, while the nocturnal ones are preparing to begin their day. 

Ah. There it is - he can smell it now. It’s something he hasn’t smelled in a while, and the realization of what it is surprises him. 

It is the scent of human blood. 

He finds the source of the smell deep in the forest, far from where any other humans typically dare to venture. There’s a woman there, lying face up on the ground, surrounded by cold, dead leaves. Her eyes are closed, and while a smile turns the corners of her mouth upward, it is the trail of tears on her face that his gaze is drawn to. 

She’s human, and she’s dying.

--

Geto Suguru has lived a very, very long time. He has spent much of that time around humans - close enough for him to learn nearly all there is to know about their nature. Close enough for him to become attuned to their thoughts and feelings, even if they keep those thoughts and feelings hidden. 

He kneels down to get a closer look at the woman lying there. She isn’t dead yet, but it won’t be long before she gets there. He can see the blood pooling around her wrists, staining the leaves beneath them a dark red that looks almost black. 

Her feelings are powerful enough that he doesn’t even have to concentrate to sense them all. There is pain there, and regret, and a lifetime of loneliness.

He knows that particular feeling well. 

“This wasn’t what you wanted,” he sighs softly, brushing a stray hair out of her face. “You did it because you felt like there was no other way, didn’t you?”

At the sound of his voice, she stirs weakly but doesn’t open her eyes. “It’s ok,” she says, her voice faint and weak. He wonders if she realizes he is real, or if she thinks she’s hallucinating in her last moments. “No one will miss me.”

“Somehow I doubt that’s true,” Geto murmurs. He lifts her left wrist to his mouth, gently stopping the flow of blood and lapping up the excess before doing the same to her right wrist. “If you still want to go through with this when you wake, I’ll help you do it,” he tells her as he lifts her easily in his arms. “But it won’t be painful like this. You won’t be alone, and I’ll make sure you don’t feel the regret and loneliness and sadness you feel now.”

He cradles her close, reassured by the rise and fall of her chest - proof that she is still breathing, still alive. 

“I promise.”

Chapter Navigation 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17

Chapter Two: Coming Soon

(If you'd like to be added to a tag list for this or any of my other fics, please let me know.)

[nimonabigbang]

The Discontent of Truth | Rated Mature

Written by Nev | @yrrtyrrtwhenihrrthrrt

Illustrated by Em | @em-k-lee | BlueSky: em-k-lee | Instagram: em_k_lee

As far as anyone knew, Ballister's salmon-haired sidekick was taken out in the merciless monster attack along with countless others. The only survivors to know of Nimona's connection to the creature were Ballister and Ambrosius, but only Ballister was aware of one crucial detail- Nimona wasn't dead. He wanted to tell Ambrosius, really, he did, but how could he? Ambrosius was ripped apart, terrified, traumatized, how could he frighten him with such information? Two years after the attack, Ballister accepts that in the interest of maintaining an honest, trustworthy relationship, the truth must be shared, no matter how much pain and misunderstanding he knows it will cause. But, while the cuts have closed, Ambrosius is far from healed from his fight with Nimona when he, unsuspecting, is confronted with this information by the only man he thought he could trust.

Content warnings and tags below the cut:

Rating: Mature

Archive Warning: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Category: M/M

Fandom: Nimona (Webcomic)

Relationships: Ballister Blackheart | Ballister Boldheart/Ambrosius Goldenloin, Ballister Blackheart | Ballister Boldheart & Nimona, Ambrosius Goldenloin & Nimona

Characters: Ambrosius Goldenloin, Ballister Blackheart | Ballister Boldheart, Nimona (Nimona)

Additional Tags: suggestive content, graphic depictions of injuries, Suicidal Ideation, Past/Referenced Suicide Attempt, Implied/Referenced Sex, Post-Canon, POV Ambrosius Goldenloin, POV Alternating, mostly ambrosius though, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Ambrosius Goldenloin Needs a Hug, Ballister Blackheart | Ballister Boldheart Needs a Hug, Arguing, Flashbacks, Nightmares, Psychological Trauma, Canon Compliant, Unreliable Narrator, Nimona Big Bang 2024 (Nimona)

Words: 10,630

Chapters: 2/2

[mostlyihyperfixate]

WrightWorth Fic Recs II: Legal Boogaloo

I've had some upper respiratory goop for eleven days and I woke up with a pounding migraine, so it's time for this month's fic recs while I wait for my medication to kick in!

I'm sure most of you guys have already read this stuff, so I'm not, like, doing this because I think I'm gonna introduce anything special. I just like to gush a lil' about stuff that makes me happy.

As always, feel free to offer me recs yourself in some capacity!

The Things We Agree to Believe are True by actual_goblin

Rating: Teen Content Warning for amnesia, angst, blood, and implied/referenced suicide Status: Finished

Recommended to me by @starsarestaringatyou.

Someone really said, "Well, if one character with amnesia is good, what if they both had amnesia?" And I love every minute of it. I sat down and read this entire thing in one fell swoop. I could not stop. It's weird, but completely internally consistent, so everything is very easy to follow. I've lost track of the number of times I've reread this. I'm afraid if I say more, I'll spoil things. It's very, very sweet, and if amnesia fics interest you even a little, I highly recommend this one!

This man is not your boyfriend by its_ok_inside

Rating: Teen Content Warning for amnesia Status: Finished

Also recommended to me by @starsarestaringatyou.

A very cute amnesia one shot. This one is a bit unusual in that there's no angst! So if that's what keeps you from this sort of story, I recommend this one. There's just a bit of pining on Miles' end, and the rest is two bros chillin' in a legal office one foot apart because they're definitely gay. It's very fluffy, and I reread this one a lot, too, when I want a quick hit of cuteness.

Legal Partners by Miggy

Rating: Teen Content Warning for miscommunication Status: Finished

This one is a little rom-com-esque, but the characters themselves (especially Ema) are well aware of that. This is the story that first allowed me to think of Klavier as having some depth. It is the level I hold all semi-seriously written Klaviers to now. There's a little bit of Klavier/Ema and Klavier/Apollo in here (both ships I like, and I hardly ever get to see the former), but ultimately Klavier ends up with something he needs more than a romantic relationship, and I love this fic for that. Everybody gets enough attention that their inclusion in the story doesn't feel obligatory. There's also the added bonus of a well-written case for Apollo and Klavier to handle throughout the story!

It Would Feel So Good To Make You Mine by hi_its_ellis and lowbatteryhealth

Rating: Teen Status: Finished

Just randomly picked something from my list last Saturday and wound up reading this throughout the day. Reread it again sometime this week. It's cute. There's established Fran/Maya and Athena/Junie as well, if you're into either of those ships. Words cannot express how wonderfully adorable this entire thing is. If you want something that's got enough conflict to keep you reading without there being any real upsetting tension or angst at all, this for you. There's no big miscommunication; just Miles and Phoenix driving everyone around them crazy with their unique brand of stubborn idiocy.

How to Court A Fool in Under Three Months by snowyrunes

Rating: Teen Content Warning for miscommunication Status: Finished

Pure, 100% rom-com goodness. This has everything you would expect out of a rom-com movie, and it's written spectacularly well. There's some established background Fran/Maya. I love seeing Fran successfully interact with kiddos, so her relationship with Trucy in this especially makes me happy--not to mention I prefer my Frans to like Phoenix in some capacity, and that's here, too. I admit that I haven't been able to get very far into the (unfinished) sequel due to the sheer amount of second-hand embarrassment I feel, but I highly recommend the first story for sure!

Pride & Prejudice & Turnabout by paintedkneecaps

Rating: Teen Status: In Progress Content Warning for Pride and Prejudice AU

On the sliding scale of cynical to sunshine Phoenix, this is firmly at the sunshine end. If you are very, very particular about how people work with Pride and Prejudice and that time period (like, to the point where you can't stand the Kiera Knightly movie, for example), this is not going to be the story for you. It's, as the author puts it, a "vibes only" AU, which I think is really a strength in this case. I've read too many "AU"s that are just slapping Ace Attorney characters names over the originals. This has a lot of thought put into the characters, and the quotes from the original work feel like friendly little winks instead of being awkwardly shoved in. I look forward to every Thursday when I get another dose of this!

[futuremrscameron]

❀˖°bahamian!reader❀˖°

content warnings: suicidal ideation, (accidental) shooting, symptoms of mental illness, sexual content, implied/referenced violence, major spoilers for outer banks s1-3

[steddieunderdogfics]

Crossroads by Penny00Dreadful

@penny00dreadful

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

6,537 words, 1/1 chapters

Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Reincarnation, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Character Death, but it's a reincarnation au so they come back!, Angst with a Happy Ending, Funerals, funeral homes, Discussions of death, Neo-Paganism, Wicca, witch burnings, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington Are Best Friends, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Pansexual Eddie Munson, Religious Content, Sickness, Blasphemy, Requited Love, Hurt Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Needs a Hug, Protective Steve Harrington, Soft Eddie Munson, War, Blood and Injury, Violence, Hurt/Comfort, Queer Eddie Munson

Summary:

Steve has loved Eddie for centuries. For millennia. In every lifetime Steve remembers. And in every lifetime Eddie doesn't. OR The reincarnation fic where Steve drags himself through millennia just for one more chance to be by Eddie's side.

Thanks for the rec! This recommendation is apart of our Writer's Wednesday! All of the recs today are written by @penny00dreadful . Want to nominate an author? Fill out this form!

You can submit fic recs to our asks or the submission box!

[wangxianficfinder]

Canon Divergence pt.2 (general) (pt.1)

~*~

The Scarlet Lotus by rainbowninja167 (M, 137k, WangXian, Marriage of Convenience, Secret Identity, Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Canon-Typical Violence, canon-typical war crimes, Yunmeng Bros, the mortifying ordeal of getting seduced by your own husband, nonlinear chronology we die like cql, just kidding nobody dies in this fic, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Miscommunication)

stay, fury, your wrist wrapped in silk by spookykingdomstarlight (E, 228k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, YLLZ LWJ, LWJ loses his golden core, yiling wei sect, Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst, Major Character Injury, Injury Recovery, Temporary Character Death, War Crimes, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Revenge, temporary impotence, growing intimacy)

I Know How Those in Exile Feed on Dreams of Hope by rabbit_habits, saltedpin (E, 474k, WangXian, NieLan, XuanLi, ChengQing, Canon Divergence, Slow Burn, Canon-Typical Violence, Presumed Dead, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Political Marriages, Ensemble Cast, minor non-canonical character death, 3zun | Venerated Triad Dynamics, the dynamics are 'UST', Canonical Character Death)

Hand in Hand Together (All Your Life) by sami (T, 41k, WZL/JC, WangXian, Queerplatonic relationship, Implied future MingLi, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Healing, Slow Burn)

The Dreams of Youth by sami (E, 85k, WangXian, YZY/TLJ, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, Fix-It, Family, Not Lan Sect Friendly, Bad Dads, good dads, JFM's A+ parenting, Qingheng-Jun's F- Existence, Childhood Friends to Lovers, Sort Of, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Some People Live/Not Everyone Dies, Canonical Character Death)

An Elegant Solution by giraffeter (E, 205k, niewangxian, canon divergence, arranged marriage, friends to lovers, fix-it, everyone lives au, courtship, polyamory, smut)

🧡 Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 742k, WangXian, WIP, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Feelings Realization, Getting Together, Sexual Tension, Supportive LQR, Light Angst, Internalized Homophobia, Period-Typical Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, WWX learns about his parents, First Dates, First Kiss, First Time, LWJ is confused, Then he is 100 percent on board, Kink Discovery, Kink Exploration, Bisexual WWX, Dual Cultivation, Slow Burn, Fix-It of Sorts, Not JFM friendly, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff and Angst, Blood and Gore, Supportive LXC, Protective LXC, Canon Divergence, Inventor WWX, Eventual Smut, Possessive LWJ, Genius WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Scheming NHS, Cultivation Discussion Conferences, Pre-Sunshot Campaign, Minor Character Death, NHS gets himself a beard (not the facial kind), POV WWX, Fluff and Smut, Burning of the Cloud Recesses)

🔒Instead by apathyinreverie (T, 27k, wangxian, fix-it, darker gusu lan, manipulative elders, but in a good way?, golden core transfer fix-it of sorts, not Jiang friendly, or anyone friendly, except wangxian, cultivation world critical, fluff, sunshot, politics, courting rituals, genius WWX, no demonic cultivation, talismans, possessive LWJ, protective LWJ, WIP)

no step had trodden black by Stratisphyre (T, 32k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Madam Lan lives, Past Rape, Golden Core Reveal, Hurt/Comfort, References to Attempted Suicide and Suicidal Thoughts, Canon-Typical Violence)

to hell and back for you by blumeraki (G, 5k, WangXian, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Universe, Protective WWX, Protective LWJ, Everything Hurts, Implied/Referenced Torture, Hurt WWX, Hurt LWJ, Branding Iron, Whipping, discipline whip, jc saves the day, Canon Divergence)

these colours fade for you only by doodlebutt (T, 36k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Everybody Lives, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, ...eventually, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, bed sharing, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Sunshot Campaign)

🔒 Blossoming flowers in a full moon - 花好月圆 by ThisIsWhereTheMagicHappens (T, 64k, wangxian, canon divergence, happy ending, fix-it of sorts, wangxian cuddle to immortarility)

🔒🧡 rain falls and soaks into the earth series by RoseThorne (T, 53k, WangXian, WIP, Near Death Experience, Attempt Drowning, Madam Yu Bashing, Recovery, No war AU)

Ties series by WithBroomBefore (M, 15k, NMJ/WQ, wangxian, canon divergence, fix-it, not everyone dies au, family feels, no golden core transfer, sect leader JYL, canon typical violence, sick fic, trans NMJ, sunshot campaign, WQ pov, happy ending)

🧡 Company by WithBroomBefore (T, 29k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Pre-Relationship, Getting Together, POV LWJ, Fix-It, Pre-Canon, at least to start, WWX goes to Cloud Recesses, But Not In The Usual Way, fear of character death, Everybody Lives, Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, Light Angst, good teacher LQR, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, brief discussion of past minor character suicide, Kitten, Not YZY Friendly)

The Devil That You Forgot by pottedplnt (Not Rated, 20k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, BAMF WWX, YLLZ WWX, Rogue Cultivator WWX, WWX Isn't Adopted by the Jiāngs, Angst, Sentient Burial Mounds, Demonic Cultivation, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Angst with a Happy Ending, Sunshot Campaign, Chronic Pain, JFM and YZY Bashing, Bad Parent YZY, Jiāng Family Bashing)

To Ride A Stygian Tiger by Madyamisam for Duochanfan (M, 111k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Time travel, Angst with a happy ending, BAMF WWX, Dark LWJ, Slow burn, Family Feels, Misunderstandings)

Those Who Defy by qurbat (G, 31k, wangxian, LWJ & LSZ & WWX, canon divergence, found family, everyone who matter lives au, justice for wen remnants, WIP)

Cultivating immortality by KizuKatana (E, 231k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Mutual Pining, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, unreliable narrator, Found Family, First Time, novel canon relationship dynamics)

🧡 a paper friend by soft_wanning (G, 4k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Fluff, Paperman!WWX, Identity Porn, Meet-Cute, Different First Meeting)

❤️ By Any Other Name by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 31k, Wangxian, Canon Divergence, Crossdressing, Misunderstandings, Identity Porn, Identity reveal)

Heart of the Beast by WaitForTheSnitch (E, 386k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Protective NMJ & NHS, Soft NMJ, Pining LWJ)

A Good Placement by madwriter223 (T, 12k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, What if YZY had been the one to find WWX AU, Emotional Manipulation, Lies, Street Child WWX, Fluff and Angst, OOC but YZY is doing that on purpose, Found Family, itty bitty Wangxian, Bittersweet Ending)

Until The End by abCEE (M, 365k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, war changes people resulting to OOC, no Pining, Established Relationship, wangxian are married and have a son, Mpreg, Good Uncle LQR, a little grey LWJ, a bit of JC bashing from LWJ, BAMF JYL, 16 years of yearning, mainly CQL verse but has scenes from the novel as well, LSZ is WangXian's Child, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Canonical Character Death -WWX, Canon Rewrite, Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts)

🔒❤️ shades of grey by cl410 (M, 58k, nielan, wangxian, Hurt/Comfort, Accidental Sibling Acquisition, Single Dad NMJ, NHS & WWX Friendship, Fluff, Humor, Happy Ending, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Protective NMJ, Some angst, Blood and Injury, Kidnapping, Protective Siblings, Found Family)

🔒Dear Fellow Traveler by Netrixie (Not Rated, 13k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alive WWX parents, immortal BSSR and family being rogue cultivators together, meet cute, travel partners falling in love, Flirting, Yearning, Sharing a Bed, Fluff, Sweet, good parental figures only, Pre-Relationship, Getting Together)

🧡 close your eyes, feel my heartbeat by ThatDesiGirl (T, 11k, WangXian, blind!WWX, Angst with a Happy Ending, Rewriting Canon, not a fix-it but a what-if, Golden Core Transfer)

🧡 Resplendence by FrozenMarVel (E, 166k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, CS Lives, Different first meeting, Fluff, Crossdressing, Love at first sight, Fix-it of sorts)

🔒Wújī by FairyTaleDreams (M, 55k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, WCZ & CS Lives, Rouge cultivator WWX)

you can have the best of me, baby by stiltonbasket (Not Rated, 12k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Pre-Relationship, Dual Cultivation, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Sunshot Campaign, Getting Together, a-yuan is wangxian's baby, Happy Ending)

There are (no) (un)written rules by Winxhelina (T, 33k, WangXian, Humor, Canon-Typical Violence, madam yu is madam yu, Misunderstandings, Angst and Humor, Mutual Pining)

You don't have to go home (there's a long way to go) by AmiraAlzilu (M, 28k, WIP, WangXian, XuanLi, not Jiang friendly, Jiāng Family Bashing, Fluff and Angst, Family Feels, WWX Has a Family, Getting to Know Each Other, Getting Together, BAMF WWX, Self-Reflection, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Fix-It)

🔒 the thread may stretch or tangle but it will never break by RoseThorne (E, 91k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Soulmates, Self-Esteem Issues, Fix-It, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, PTSD, Handfasting, Panic Attacks, Getting Together, First Time, Aftercare, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, /Referenced Torture, Scars, Chronic Pain, Golden Core Reveal, First Time, Switching, sex-related injury, LWJ Stays at the Burial Mounds, LSZ is a Wèi, Good Sibling JC, Dissociation, Burial Mounds Settlement Days)

[redfoxwritesstuff]

Another Day in Paradise- Chapter 1

Pairing: Eventually Alastor x OFC, later- Alastor x ofc x Lucifer Rated: E for eventual smut Content warnings: It's Hazbin Hotel- this feels redundant. Sex, eventual smut, referenced implied suicide to be discussed in more detail later, drugs, drinking, poor coping, toxic behavior, controlling behavior, cannibalism, idk, it's fucking Hazbin Hotel, if it's worth a content warning it's probably going to come up at some point?

AN: Coping with mental heal spirals with new fandom crack? Fuck yes we are. Did I think I was over simping for cartoons at 33? Also fuck yes, but here we are. Idk how long this will be but hey, it'll get finished eventually if there's interest in it. I'm playing some with the timeline, starting off prior to season 1 and we're running through it.

Chapter 2

Summery: Amber hated her life but she smiled and took what it gave her. She had tried to be a good Christian wife. She tried to give the to God everything he was due. She tried to be devoted enough. She tried to survive the cult she was raised in. She tried until the day she couldn't try anymore and then, she had hoped to never have to try again.

Instead of an eternal sleep as her punishment for not trying hard enough, she woke in the very place she had been taught was a lie fed by false Christians- Hell. With her body changed, her resilience gone and no way to get her feet under her in her new afterlife, she pulled herself up the hill to the newly renamed Hazbin Hotel, tail between her legs and without anything to offer in exchange for mercy and charity.

Could the safety of the hotel provide her what she needs to finally blossom? And what, if anything, could she blossom into? And why is Alastor interested? And what role could she fill for the King of Hell himself?

~~~~~~~~~~<3~~~~~~~~~~<3

Amber opened her eyes, which was something she shouldn’t be able to do. It was supposed to be over. Everything was supposed to be over. It was supposed to have ended. So why was she still alive? 

Sounds flooded her ears as she regained her faculties. That was another thing she was never supposed to do again. Yelling, screaming, explosions, engines and the simple sounds of city life which made no sense. She didn’t live in a city, she lived in bum fuck rural ass no where and more pressingly, she was dead. Or she should have been. 

That was something she had personal seen to, for fucks sake. 

“Good, you’re awake.” A voice that was soft as velvet spoke from a distance. The voice sounded like bells, musicale. 

“Where am I?” She pushed herself up against the wall. 

The room she was in looked to be abandoned, a thick layer of dust covered the ground and trash had gathered in the corners. There was an open exterior door, giving way to what looked like a busy street and the source of the trash. Next to her was a golden office door that looked like it hadn’t been opened in years. Another wall housed a closing elevator door. 

It was from the elevator that the voice seemed to come. 

“For your sins, you’ve been sentenced to an afterlife in hell. Sorry, that sucks.” 

“What?” 

~~~~~<3

That was how her first day in hell went. She had woken up, dumped on a dirty old office floor with a tank top and cargo pants that didn’t belong to her. She didn’t even have shoes on her feet. 

It took less than a month for her to end up exhausted in front of the hotel that promised to rehabilitate sinners. Amber didn’t know if she wanted to ascend to heaven but she did know she wasn’t going to survive on the streets of Pentagram City for much longer. 

She was weak. she was tired. Her body was starved. In her short time in hell she had learned that she like many of her fellow residents, didn’t have fuck all for powers and no way to defend herself. Unlike many of the others however, she struggled to find the fight to gain a foothold. 

After spending a lifetime being told to be smaller, meeker, and weaker, she simply had no bite to her. No one wanted to hire a girl who was too timid to keep their shop from being robbed. No one would rent a flat to a girl who couldn’t manage the income to afford food, let alone the rent. 

Sleeping on the streets, on benches and in whatever alley she could find provided little rest. More often than not she’d wake with a start, hands on her. When she was lucky, they’d just take what little things she had managed to acquire. Other things it was her body itself they wanted. 

Those that bothered her were so much like her though, weak. Powerless. Timid. Easy to frighten. She easy target for them when she was asleep but as soon as she woke, like cockroaches they would scatter. It was better to not sleep.

Refocusing on the present, she took a deep breath and tried to gather the courage she needed. Her heart was in her throat as she stood at the door. 

In life, you didn’t knock on hotel doors and wait to be let in. It was weird. This was weird. She had almost convinced herself to walk back down the hill when the door opened. 

“Hello~” The tall woman swept the door open with such cheer and energy, attention focusing on Amber in a instant. “Are you here for a chance at redemption?” 

“I don’t know.” Amber answered reflexively, honestly. She had heard tell of how kind the Princess of Hell was but being faced with the first ounce of kindness in her afterlife left her speechless and feeling the urge to run just as much as she would have if faced with aggression. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come.”

The Princess watched her as she turns to leave and though Amber couldn’t explain it, it was like a switch flipped in the tall woman. The kindness and warmth remained but it subdued as she took in Amber’s appearance. 

The Princess’s eyes took stock of the girl in front of her. She was wearing much the same clothes she would have arrived in hell in, if not the very same- it was near standard issue. The girl outside the hotel looked simply rough, hair dirty and tangled. 

“Are you alright?” Amber flinched as the Princess reached out, snagging her fingers. Amber jerked away from the contact on reflex, sure she was going to be hurt. 

“I don’t- I’m not- redemption isn’t for me.” She settled as she backed away a few more steps.”

“You’re new, aren’t you?” Stepping outside of the hotel, the Princess allowed the door to close behind her before she continued. Amber didn’t know it at the time but she was seeing something few had gotten the chance to see- Princess Charlotte caring for one of her people, not Charlie the over energetic dreamer. 

“I’m Charlie. It looks like you’ve had a rough start to your life here. I’m sorry for that. Mom used to have staff that greeted new sinners, helped them find their feet but Dad- He’s fallen away from that. It makes for a rough landing, I bet. Why don’t you come in?” 

~~~~~<3

The princess of hell was in possession of a bleeding heart that made her eager to collect the stray fox regardless of her weak protests at the door.

The reality was, Amber didn’t have the strength to offer much protest at all, though she did try. Trusting in theory was a lot less scary than trusting in reality, she discovered as the Princess dragged her inside the hotel. There were eyes on her as she walked, head down and shoulders slumped but Amber didn’t dare face them. Bitter tears stung at her eyes.

Charlie led her through the halls and to a room to call her own. It was a modest room, though mainly at Amber’s insistence. She had no money to pay for her stay, no hope for redemption and nothing to offer. She wouldn’t take a nice room that they could give to someone better deserving.

“Stay as long as you want. All I ask in return is that you help or participate, even if you don’t think anything will come of it.” Charlie said, as she stood just inside the room. 

“Why?” Amber hated that her eyes stung with emotion she didn’t want to name. “Why are you letting me stay?”

“Because you came for help and this place; it’s about helping people. Clean up, take some time for yourself and when you’re ready, come down. We have dinner at six, if you want you’re welcome to join. You’re safe here.” 

~~~~~<3

Amber didn’t have anything to store in her room. It wasn’t like she could unpack to kill time. She’d have to make do with what she had been ever so generously provided, and she would, without complaint. 

The bed called to her. She was so tired. The call of the shower, of being clean was stronger though. She wouldn’t dirty the bed with the mess that was her clothes, hair and body. 

Dragging herself to the bathroom, she stripped and started washing out her clothes in the bathtub. Dirt, blood and god knows what else dislodged from the fabric while she did the best she could to clean it. It was disgusting.

It was humiliating but she reminded herself that this wasn’t the first time she had washed her laundry in a bathtub. It wasn’t as uncommon as it should have been in her living life. It wasn’t like she had another option, anyway. She didn’t have any other clothes.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when there was a knock at her room door. “Hold on!” Amber called, searching for something to cover herself with. 

“It’s me again.” Charlie’s voice came through the door, “Can I come in?” 

Amber wrapped a towel around her and left the soaked clothes in the bottom of the tub where they made a dirty puddle of water as she made her way to the door. Opening it, she peeked out at the tall woman. 

“I brought you a change of clothes.” She said, passing the bundle to Amber. “They’re some of my girlfriend’s old stuff, she doesn’t really wear them anymore and she’s shorter than me so they’ll fit you better than anything I have. I hope that’s okay?” 

“Why?” Amber could feel the way her ears sagged, nearly flat against the crown of her head. 

“It’s okay.” Charlie smiled down at the little fox demon, so beaten down by the world she was sentenced into. How could someone so meek and timid manage enough sin to end up down here? “I want to help you.”

Amber nodded, shoulders sagging as she tried to will the burning from her eyes. 

“What’s your name?” Charlie asked as she rested her hand on a bare shoulder, softly rubbing while she watched the girl try to hold herself together. 

“Amber.” Her voice was hardly more than a whimper.

“Do you want a hug, Amber?” 

Amber nodded weakly and stepped into the Princess of Hell’s embrace. Charlie’s arms wrapped around her and held her tight. Amber nuzzled her head under Charlie’s chin as the tall woman stroked her hand down the waves of red hair. 

At first, Amber didn’t realize she was crying. She hadn’t had a chance to grieve until now, the life she had lived and all that she had lost. When death encroached on her, she had thought it was over and she could rest. 

Sobs ripped through her chest as she clung to Charlie’s jacket, trusting the towel to stay in place where it was tucked into itself. Amber grieved for the life she had lived and the sins she had committed. She cried for the bodies she saw ripped apart in the streets over the last few weeks. Her shoulders shook with the power of her grief until the tears finally tapered off, soothed away by the soft weight of the Princess’ hand running down the length of her hair. 

“Go get yourself a hot shower, okay? Throw out those ‘welcome to hell’ issued spawn clothes. I don’t know how long you’ve been here but you can start your life over. You can have happy days in hell.” Charlie spoke softly, glancing down the hall and locking eyes with her worried girlfriend before returning her attention to the small girl in her arms. Amber hadn’t realized she never let the woman in, instead stepping out in just a towel. 

“Okay.” Amber sniffled before forcing a smile that felt as weak as it was forced. “I’m sorry for crying on you. So much for everyone being tough in hell.” 

“It’s okay. It’s hell, not everyone’s big bad and tough but everyone is broken.” Charlie smiled down at her and couldn’t resist resting her hand on Amber’s head, fingers stretching between the soft ears. 

~~~~~<3

Soaked clothes were left to drain in the sink while Amber sat in the tub under the burning spray of hot water. Pain, lovely sweet pain she could control filled her senses as she continued to grieve. She had thought she had run out of tears in the Princess’ arms but she had found a new well to tap when the hot water hit her skin. 

Eventually, the tears stopped and she pulled herself off the floor. Mechanically she used the complementary soaps to wash her body. Washing her hair was a struggle, she accidentally sent water and suds into her ears more than once. It wasn’t a great experience but it did manage to shake her out of her sadness and replace it with indignant annoyance. 

“How the fuck do I do this?!” Amber grumbled to herself, pinching an ear between her fingers and pulling it painfully down, trying to block the water from entering the stupid tall ear while trying to rinse suds from the fur and hair around it. 

It took a her a moment to decide what was the proper thing to wash a tail with, a debate that felt surreal. Did you wash a fur covered body part with shampoo or a body wash bar? Dogs were washed with shampoos, she decided, so that was what she would use but God above, she’s never felt so uncertain on how to clean her body in her life. 

It felt weird to her still, to touch her tail. The changes her body had undergone upon her death were strange but easy enough to forget about as long as she didn’t touch them or look at them too long. She could pretend her nails were just freshly manicured for Halloween into claws. While running, hiding and scavenging, it was easy to not see herself and forget about the new form of her body. 

This was the first time she had a chance to come to terms with the changes. It was also the first the she had no choice but to acknowledge them. Still, it was weird. 

In a way, she was thankful all in all. She’d seen imps that look more like monsters and people that looked like massive bugs. She’d seen ogres and people that looked more beast than man. There were people with more than two arms or legs, only one eye or far more than two eyes. Things walked the streets covered in scales and fur and yet she looked oh so similar to what she had in life. 

Why was that? Why did she seem to look so human? Amber wasn’t sure there was a rhyme or reason to anything in hell. 

She squeezed the water out of her tail after wringing out her hair. This was the most she had handled her tail since realizing it existed. Thick dark red fur ran down the length until it gave way to white at the tip. The fucking thing could hold a lot of water in all that fur, that was for sure. When it was wet, it was heavy and uncomfortable.

Wrapping herself in a towel and stepping out of the tub, she prepared to properly face her reflection for the first time. Glimpses in mirrors, glass and puddles had been the most she had braved looking until now. 

There wasn’t a reason to put herself through that stress while trying to survive in a world of monsters. She’d seen people stabbed to death and some man with a dog’s head step over the still warm body as if it was nothing. 

Now she was safe. Or at least, Charlie said she was and it seemed like she could be trusted. What a world Amber had woken up in, where she drags herself to the devil’s daughter’s hotel for charity. And gets it! 

A giggle at the thought threatened to spill from her throat. It was misplaced, a reaction to stress and anxiety. Wiping off the steam from the mirror as the giggle died down, she took a deep breath and faced herself. 

In life, her skin had been olive and kissed by the sun. Now she looked washed out, pale as a corpse. That was a common skin tone, she had noticed in the last few weeks. Everyone looked pale as the dead if their skin wasn’t covered in fur, even those with darker skin tones were washed out and ashen.

Curly brown hair had been replaced by bright red waves. The eyes that looked back at her should have been rich chocolate brown and instead they were inhumanly green. That wasn’t the only inhuman feature about her. Her face was more angular and her teeth sharp points in her mouth. 

On top of her head sat tall red ears, tipped with black. She watched as they twitched, seeming to communicate her curiosity. It reminded her of how the husky she had as a child would express himself with his ears, always flicking and flattening to tell his mood. It wasn’t something she was very good at controlling but she found she could intentionally move them. 

It was weird. Lifting the hair at the side of her head, she looked at where her ears should have been. It wasn’t just that the ears were missing, the hairline was shifted, going to her neck in a smooth curve rather than dipping back around where the ear would have been. 

Weird. This was so fucking weird. 

She was just thankful looking at herself in the mirror didn’t add much to her trauma or make herself vomit. It was more of a curiosity than anything. The woman looking back at her was so much like herself and yet in every way, wrong. 

She had no bra but thankfully her new body didn’t come equipped with a particularly sizable bust. She would have liked the support and security of a bra for the normalcy the feeling would have provided but beggars and all that shit. The shirt was long and thin, a pretty basic tee shirt that was almost a dress, reaching to her upper thighs.

That was good because Amber didn’t know if these clothes were to keep or to be returned. She tried stuffing her tail in the pants but decided quickly that it didn’t work. There wasn’t a way to fold it up so the pants could rest where they should have. 

It was painful to try. 

The pants were very much like leggings and she rolled the top down so it rest low on her hips. 

“Welcome back to the 2000s,” Amber mumbled to herself as she looked at how dangerously low the pants sat. This allowed the pants to sit so that her tail could hang out overtop. 

It wasn’t comfortable but if she stuck her tail out a good bit but it worked.