#considering im so familiar with the game its not like its going to be a drag to set up for

[picopepin]

Im going to do a rune level 1 run :D

[yesimwriting]

you write art and patrick so well im literally foaming at the mouth for more

yes yes everyone pls ask me about my boyfriends that are also boyfriends to each other 🩷 (i have two extra drafts for them already)

----

breath in. the pad of your thumb presses into the side of the ball. you give yourself a beat to feel the weight of it, to embrace the familiar feeling of felt against your palm. breath out.

you bounce the ball once. breath in. you squeeze the ball, knuckles briefly straining beneath your skin before letting it hit the concrete again. breath out.

finally, you raise the arm holding your racket. every joint in your body is locked into place. there's a science to a sharp serve. the ball will land where you will it to.

you release the ball, arm stretching forward. a total follow through. the ball hits the center of your racket. the force of your hit propels the ball through the air until it hits the center of the other side of the court.

ugh. the night before your qualifying match and suddenly the precise serve you spent years perfecting loses its edge. what happened to the serve that media outlets have been calling 'the ultimate point guaranteer'? why is today the day that you can only manage a perfectly average serve?

you groan, letting the disappointment's weight settle against your chest. you suck. with a sigh, you start walking towards the extra tennis balls you left near the net. your dad is so never going to get over you not qualifying for the us open.

"there she is." the voice surprises you enough to force you to still. patrick...and a few steps behind him, his doubles partner, art. "the princess of modern tennis."

you turn your head enough to glare in patrick's direction. he's referencing a title some journalist used in one article that your dad decided would be perfect for marketing materials. "don't."

normally, you like seeing patrick and art more than you can justify. you don't know if you can consider yourself their friend, it's not like you guys see each other outside of coincidental run ins at tennis events. the three of you have been to more and more of the same tournaments these days. they're familiar in a way that settles you, like the feel of tennis ball in your hand.

you try to tap into that usual warmth, but you can't quite get there. it's not their fault you're frustrated.

art gives you a look that feels like an apology. he walks forward, opening the gate to the fence and stepping onto the court. "i told him not to."

you bend down to pick up a spare ball. "i appreciate the effort."

"what?" patrick follows art onto the court. "it's on billboards."

he's seen your billboard? you don't know why you feel the need to dwell on that. you weren't the biggest fan of having a picture of yourself blown up and pasted everywhere, especially with a caption that makes potential losses extra embarrassing, but you've never been truly self conscious about it. now, you're trying to picture it in your mind, trying to remember the details of your expression, the way your hair was styled, what you were wearing.

you let go of the ball in your hand, bouncing it against the ground so that you have something to look at. "it was a charity thing."

"i know." you let yourself glance up at patrick. he's closer than you thought he'd be. you catch the ball before releasing it again. "for the youth outreach program thing, right?" before you can answer, he extends an arm, catching the ball before you can reach it. "you looked cute in it."

art looks at you again, something a little more distinct than apology behind his eyes. he reaches for the tennis ball still in patrick's hand. "patrick."

he twists his arm away before his friend can steal the ball from him. art follows him, leaning forward and grabbing his arm. "what?" their play fight grows in physicality, with each of them pushing and pulling at the other. you'd worry about the game losing its lightheartedness if both of them weren't smiling. "you stared at it for more than five minutes before getting out of the car."

"really?"

art freezes, his hand squeezing the only part of the ball patrick's left exposed. "it was a good billboard, you look pretty--looked pretty." the implication of his correction hits him a second too late. "not that you don't look pretty now, you always look pretty, but you looked really--" he cuts himself off with a sharp breath, "but that wasn't the point, you also looked like a strong role model for underprivileged young women."

the compliments paired with his uncertainty make it difficult not to melt. you beam at him. "thank you, art." you adjust your hold on your racket, both hands resting on the grip. "i think you're pretty, too."

he smiles, head briefly angling itself downwards. art manages to steal the tennis ball from his friend. you can't tell if he pulled it out of patrick's grasp or if patrick chose to let go.

"you know what the best thing to do is the night before a big match?" patrick's question feel rhetorical until you look at him. he's watching you like he's waiting for something.

despite knowing what you should be doing, you also know that you're incapable of not playing along. "what?"

"doing anything that keeps you from getting in your head." you stand a little straighter, chin angling itself a fraction of an inch upwards. as nice as the local doubles duo is, advice offered from other tennis players comes with its own sort of tension. saying that you know best implies that you see yourself as the best. "that's what's wrong with your serve."

your eyebrows briefly pinch together. "you think i'm in my head?"

he takes a slight step forward, body angling itself to make the distance between you feel even smaller than it truly is. "i think your serve is technically perfect." patrick takes a moment to press his lips together. "but you're tense."

patrick's going about this the nice way. he's focusing on what you're doing right. you technique is objectively precise, your dad made sure of that. he's coached you since you were old enough to securely hold a racket for a reason. but tennis isn't just routine and muscle memory.

there's an art to the sport, and you know the difference it makes when you're playing. you can feel when your heart is in it, and right now, all you can think about is that your retired tennis champion dad watching you in the stands.

the feeling of something warm on your shoulder pulls you out of your train of thought. you blink. patrick's hand is on your shoulder. "you need to relax."

"i'm..." it's instinct to argue, to insist that you're fine and that you'll push through, but something tells you that that'd be pointless. he'd know. "i'll work it out."

his fingers briefly press into your shoulder, the squeeze assuring and gentle. "that's your problem--work." you look at him skeptically. "you're overworking yourself, and it's putting you in your head."

art angles himself a little closer. he extends an arm, placing his fingers on the edge of your racket. "that's why you're supposed to rest the night before a match."

the thought of not being in motion isn't appealing. if anything, you feel like you have too much energy in your system. but objectively, you know they're generally right.

art gently tugs on your racket. "you should come hang out with us."

"yeah," patrick agrees with a slight hum, "you're in the hotel down the street, right?"

okay--you know the right answer. your dad would be mad if he found out you snuck out the night before a match to practice, but if he found out you ended up in a hotel room with some guys--he'd die and then come back to life just to kill you.

"um..." your eyes briefly fall to your racket. "yeah, i am." okay, you need to think of an excuse that doesn't make you sound like a little kid with a curfew. you twist your wrist slightly, a halfhearted attempt to free your racket. "but it's kind of late...and i have to be up early tomorrow."

art pulls on your tennis racket again. there's nothing overly forceful about it, but it's enough to make you look at him. "yeah, but you were going to stay out here for a awhile, right?"

"and it's good to take your mind off of things." patrick tacks on his point. "i mean--we always do something fun before our matches."

patrick stretches out an arm, the back of his hand softly hitting art's shoulder. "yeah, yeah, we do."

you press the nail of your thumb against the side of your racket's handle. "really?" you're mumbling to yourself more than anything else, "something fun."

it's risky. if anything goes wrong, you'll never hear the end of it. and if you mess up tomorrow because you're tired or distracted, you're not sure you'll be able to forgive yourself. you've already taken some risks tonight. you should quit while you're ahead.

then again, you like being around them, and they're in the same hotel as you. it can't be that bad of an idea.

you let out a reluctant sigh before finally looking up. you glance between them, too aware that it's too late for you. "okay," you breathe out, "i guess going up for a little bit can't hurt."

patrick grins. "can't hurt at all."

art lets go of your racket before taking a few steps forward. he stops once he's at your side before throwing an arm around your shoulder. "you know us." art's hand settles over patrick's. "we'd never do anything to hurt you."

warmth crawls up your chest. you're comfortable with them--maybe too comfortable. "yeah," you hum in an attempt to dismiss the feelings bubbling in your chest, "let's just go."

——

im thinking of writing a part 2 to this so if you’d be interested in that and/or would want to be tagged pls lmk :)

[nochukoo97]

we can’t be friends (wait for your love) - teaser

pairing: childhoodfriend!jk x childhoodfriend!oc

summary: you and jungkook have been friends since birth, and as you both grow into teenagers, you can’t help but have some sorr of longing feeling towards him. but after a turn of events, you move away from your home town, growing apart from the boy you onced were close to. almost a decade later when you decide to move back, there’s someone familiar yet unfamiliar waiting for your arrival… was this the universe giving you a sign about him?

warnings/tags: story starts off when the both of them are children, but most of the plot is when they are adults :)), eventual: kissing, an emotional rollercoaster 🥲, they’re stuck in a ‘what are we’ moment, playing a waiting game of who confesses first, a little bit of angst, smut, but fluff too hehe

a/n: IM BACK 🥲 after being in writers block sighhh but i am back hehehe hope u r excited for this!! anyways this is just an intro for the actual fic, its more of what happened before the present which will be in the main part hehehe

TAGLIST OPEN!!

(this is the introduction, the main part is coming soon :)))

MASTERLIST

23 July 2007

You’re currently wedged between two bookshelves in the living room of your house, eyes trained on the words in your book, giggling to yourself when the plot takes a funny turn. Meanwhile in the background, Jungkook and your brother Taehyung, both a year older than you, the two ten year old boys play fighting in your parents backyard, their game was way too rough for you to even watch, you decided.

That’s always the way it’s been since you were young, Jungkook’s mum dropping him off at your parents place as he spent time with your brother, mostly roughhousing like they are now, and you, at nine years old, simply tucking yourself in another fairytale, which to you seemed like a much better way to past time.

You never truly spent a lot of time with the two of them when Jungkook would come over, besides the once-in-a-while moments where your parents would make you guys bond a little through board games or card games which the two elder boys would never take seriously, the games always ending in them either throwing the board game pieces at each other or stacking the cards into a pyramid.

When it came to school, you tried your best to stay away from bumping into your brother at school, but you’d always end up being teased in front of your friends by him and Jungkook, making fun of your two pigtails or your very glittery pink bag you had just gotten as a birthday gift, but you were used to it anyways, having grown up with a brother.

12 August 2011

Four years go by and now you’re finally completing your last year in middle school, Jungkook and your brother having moved on to high school, and as expected, they end up attending the same school, as they have done their whole life.

But since four years ago, a lot has changed. You’ve grown much closer to Jungkook, having gone on quite a few trips with his family, and you could even consider him a close friend. Most importantly, he’d grown from being a kid to a teenager, even though he was only a year older than you, the 14 year old boy suddenly became someone you always wanted to hang out with. To you, you saw him as someone cool. Instead of teasing you along with your brother, he now would defend you from your brother’s teasing, treat you to ice cream on the weekends and even teach you the video games he played with your brother.

“And then he let me get as many toppings as I wanted,” You tell your friends, clicking the buttons on your phone to show them the picture of your ice cream, filled to the brim with all sorts of toppings because Jungkook said you could.

“You’re so lucky, I wish I had a boyfriend like that,” Jiyeon sighs, pouting her lips as she sulks.

Your face turns red, tip of your ears warm as you quickly deny, “He isn’t my boyfriend! Just a friend… In fact he was my brother’s friend first,” No, you couldn’t even begin to try and imagine Jungkook as someone more than your friend!

“Well, but you should definitely confess to him on valentine’s day, it’s in like six months,” Yuji twirls her hair, nudging your leg slightly as she giggled.

To the three of you, as 13 year old girls, having a valentine was a big deal, especially since the whole idea of a crush and all was new to you guys as teenage girls.

“No! I don’t have feelings for him! He’s just nice to me I guess,” You frown at Yuji, just because she confessed to her crush and now apparently has a boyfriend, doesn’t mean you need to do it too, you decided.

You didn’t have a crush on Jungkook right?

You push away the thought quickly, this whole topic was so taboo to you, it made you feel squirmy thinking about it. No, you didn’t have any sort of feelings towards the older boy, never.

-

So that day when you arrived back at home, spotting Jungkook and Taehyung sitting at the table and doing their homework, you decide to take a seat away from the certain boy.

“Huh? Why are you sitting all the way there? Come back here,” Jungkook hums, pulling out his earphones in bewilderment, you had always sat next to him whilst the three of you would do homework together after school, nudging him here and there to ask for help with a math problem.

“I- okay,” You scooch towards the chair next to him, dragging your books along the table as you avoid eye contact. Your cheeks heating up again as you remember your conversation with your friends in school earlier, it made you feel all tingly inside, but why were you being so weird in front of him?

“You’ve been staring at that math problem for ages, need help?”

You jump up in surprise at Jungkook’s voice , letting out a small yelp as your brother snickers at you from across the table, you kick his shin in response, sending his hands flailing to the injury, mumbling some cuss word you don’t understand.

“Yeah,” You only muster out a whisper, handing over your pencil to the boy, who finds your behaviour a little off but nonetheless, doesn’t comment on it.

And while he explains the solution and working to find the value of X, you can only notice his eyes, his nose, the mole under his lips, the scar on his cheek from when he fought with your brother years ago, his lips.

And then you for yourself to snap out of your daydream when his eyes lock with yours in confusion as to why you’re staring at him instead of your workbook.

03 January 2012

But then five months later, opportunity for valentine’s day didn’t even come for you anyways, as you pack your bags to move miles away from the place you once called home, since your father had been posted to a new country for his work.

The whole idea of leaving your life behind and all the people you’ve ever known since young was such an overwhelming feeling that you didn’t even think once about your feelings for Jungkook anymore, or maybe you did once, but it didn’t matter.

So when you tugged your luggage and watch your brother sadly hug his best friend goodbye at the airport, reality struck, you wouldn’t ever get a chance to even properly assess your feelings for Jungkook anyways, so you simply wave him goodbye, not looking back so you don’t think further than a goodbye.

He did make sure to exchange his Instagram and Facebook with you, promising you and your brother to keep in touch, which you agreed to. Maybe there was a part of you that wanted to cling onto the idea of him, but you didn’t let yourself believe that anyways.

[verdantlights]

Thoughts/Analysis Part 2 (but its coherent)

OKay so i slept (finally) after staying up since wednesday morning and only getting roughly 5 hours of sleep in total?? until I finally managed to get decent hours of sleep last night. anyways. i am still not normal in the slightest over round 7 but i have many more thoughts, am a lot more coherent, and have had it swimming in my head for a while.

TW for mentions of drug use. I'm gonna start with Luka. I've stated in the edit I made of the original post as well as in a few reblogs, but Luka is a victim. A lot of people are Luka haters, and that's valid! I am also, to an extent, a Luka hater.... even if I have a thing for blonde twinks with issues. But his character is also incredibly interesting. If you are familiar with Honkai: Star Rail, then you might understand what I'm saying when I think Luka is a combination of both Sunday AND Robin. He has the trapped bird in a cage mentality from Robin with the need for order and control mentality from Sunday. Order and control referring to winning being the only thing keeping his sanity in check.

Luka, as a human pet, is aware that he is playing a losing game. He needs to win, but he knows that winning Season 50 is not the end. He may have won against Till, but now the segyein are going to put him against Hyuna, considering Hyuna and Mizi were referred to as special guests. The way he looked at Hyuna in that last scene was part of him realizing this. It's the face you pull when you realize something horrible, but you need to keep face/keep your composure.

Their ear pieces are similar to their collars in that they show the emotions of the wearer. We can clearly see Till's earpiece glowing red the entire time (up until Mizi appears), and Luka's is constantly glowing green. Luka was seen in hysterics pretty much the entire time like the one frame where he's holding in his laughter.

Luka was drugged on something that makes him euphoric and lose his sense of control, like weed or cocaine. He found fucking with Till to be the funniest thing ever, but it's not normal for Luka to be so outwardly expressive of his elation. We know he enjoyed fucking with Mizi, even if it let to getting his ass beat, but even then, he wasn't as expressive then as he was with Till. That leads me to believe that he has something in his system to heighten his emotional output as well as some sort of adrenaline drug like what Till was most likely given.

What bugs me is that they don't show us what color his earpiece is as he looks at Hyuna. We see Till's earpiece turn green at Mizi, but does Luka's stay green as he looks at Hyuna? I feel it was orange, but that's just me.

Luka now knows what's about to happen, which is also why Hyuna tries to stop Mizi. Hyuna knew the whole time that if they were to save Till, they'd be walking straight into the trap. Mizi's heart is too kind and she's desperate to save Till.

Thankfully, what Hyuna had gone there for originally seems to be completed. Whatever files she was downloading was complete before she went after Mizi, and I think that's where were gonna see Issac and Dewey again. I think she might've been uploading those files to them so that they can take the lead from there. This leads me to my prediction for the next episode. (ill get to till last, hes my little meow meow and im not normal about him)

I don't think Blink Gone is done. I believe there is a part two to the Finals, and that round 7 wasn't even the final round. I've already stated that the most likely thing to happen next is Luka v Hyuna, but then I also talked about Issac and Dewey.

Hyuna could have gotten her hands on high profile data regarding Alien Stage. She sends the data to Dewssac, and they shut down the stage from the inside, allowing the resistance to come in and do a massive sweep, hopefully before either Hyuna, Luka, or Mizi dies.

Now, as for Mizi. We know Mizi is the main character, and there are people who are saying Till's death boosts her hero arc. Now there are two ways I see this happening, either:

Vivinos keeps up their streak of tragedy and kills off everyone, leaving Mizi isolated entirely.

Or someone (dewssac, hyuna, mizi, maybe even luka) pull through and live to save more people.

If it's the first one, Till is dead dead. If the second, Till has a chance at being alive.

There are many reasons why Till is most likely alive, and as a hopeful feeler... I also am clinging onto the more hopeful ending (the second option). Not just because "Haha guys I need Till to be alive, he's my bias" but also because seeing Mizi completely isolated and forced to fake a smile and perform would absolutely fucking destroy me and I don't think I'd ever be the same after that, honestly. Like that genuinely scares me.

There's the narrative of ALNST and vivimeng's beautiful storytelling. That is my number one hopeful reasoning for Till being alive. If Till dies here, it would be utterly nonsensical and it would ruin the narrative. It would completely void all of Ivan's character, for starters. I was just talking about this with @rockwgooglyeyes and Vant (idt they wanna be tagged here), but Ivan's character is static. He is not dynamic or fluid, but he is extraordinarily complex which makes up for it. He never really had an arc of his own unless you count what happened in his past during/before being bought by Unsha. His death is meant to haunt the narrative, meant to haunt Till. So why would he die, only for Till to die a few hours later? It would completely ruin what he was meant for and it would be so unsatisfying and bitter.

However, there's also the thematics of ALNST. Rock called out @pwippy for this already, but I'm gonna call them out too because fuck you plip (/j i love you plipster). Rock put it really well in these two excerpts I took from his post:

"Alien Stage is a universe full of suffering and pain for humans, forced to perform until they literally die on stage, all for the entertainment of the audience. It's not even meant as a way of exerting control or oppressing them, though it serves that purpose, because why would the seygein bother to oppress something that can't even fight back? Why go to the trouble of controlling something that is just a pet, whose cries are the fuel for a new age?"

Once again mentioning the Hunger Games because I genuinely can't help myself I love THG way too much, but that's the key difference between ALNST and THG: the human pets aren't being forced to do this because of a past rebellion and are being punished by the oppressing government... They're being thrown into this for fun. Full credit to @alien-til-i-stage who said this as a joke, but it is really fucking real, but the segyein bringing their human pets to watch ALNST in the audience are like people bringing dogs to a dog fight in real life. And that, I fear, puts into perspective as to just how much of a pet the humans are to the segyein. They are only there for entertainment. The resistance is mostly a thorn in their side as of right now (dewey and issac better change that next episode or istg) and killing these humans is simply just fun for them. They know humans can be hostile, just like dogs, but they tame them and make them docile and obedient, only to make them kill each other in the end, even if it's through a singing competition rather than an all out teeth and claws brawl. (except for round 5, that doesnt count)

"In this world of pain and suffering, perhaps death is a mercy. If Till is truly dead, then he no longer a tool for his oppressors, he is free of their control. For Ivan and Sua both of their deaths were mercies to them- Ivan was able to die for the one he loved, as was Sua, and neither of them were forced to live in a world without their beloved."

(thank you rock i love you pookie snookie)

He also mentions that it's not in character for Till to die, which I completely agree with. Till's persona is that of someone who wants to win, but not in the same way Luka needs to win. Till wants to win to live and survive with those he loves, he wants to win to beat the system, but considering how dystopian of a world this is, as much as he wants to win and save Mizi, he craves death as a freedom.

That out of the way, another thing that @junebluues actually got me to think about was this:

The bomb has Till's eyes and is crying as it knows it's going to die (assuming it's a sentient alien like Freddie). And the comparison here honestly opened my eyes a little bit and got me thinking.

Was Till a catalyst? Because that was a smoke bomb. I ended up thinking about it for a minute and came up with three possibilities where Till is a bomb/smoke bomb:

Mizi is using Till to hide her feelings

Till is the bomb that sets off a chain of events

Till is used to hide/cover up the real plan for either the segyein or for the resistance

I don't think it's the first one, I feel like it'd be closer to the other two, but any three of those could work. Because Mizi's feelings of despair over her situation can be hidden behind the hope as she reached out for Till. But as the smoke clears (Till dies) she remembers that it was, in fact, a bomb.

EDIT: Also, the lyric that plays during the smoke bomb scene is "No, don't look back now" which also kinda leads me to believe that Till is the start of a chain/domino effect. Once you knock the first domino, you can't go back.

I think someone somewhere had also talked about Till being forced to be used as a catalyst/bait again considering how well it worked here. There's a good chance Urak might have supplied the drugs to Till and also paid out or WAS paid out by another person to use Till as bait. Urak wouldn't want his pet that he is grossly possessive over to die that easily without every ounce of use being wrung out of him,,, something something Till being a Trojan Horse of sorts (thanks rock for that one, too).

EDIT: I also remembered that during the sequence in the song where the audience is singing the chorus and we see Ivan on the screens, is when Till looks like he's about to pass out. What gets me here is the fact that it is quite literally a chorus of vultures. The audience singing the chorus with images of Ivan surrounding him and seeing Luka mimic Ivan made Till realize that he was surrounded and that's when he started losing hope. It's why his reaction to Mizi is so prominent, because it's like she was there to save him from the vultures. The audience singing is my favorite and also least favorite part of the video/song because the feeling of being surrounded and cornered with everyone against you and their voices echoing in your head... really does it for me. I really want to animate this sequence from up close in Till's POV.

Anyways the 4th reason i had for the bomb theory was that Till is smoking hot (sorry). okay im done now i think,,,,,, i might actually come back with more because i think i forgot something... but i cant remember..... i forgor.....

other tags: @shakingparadigm @aakaneeee @ivanttakethis @k9punkout @crustyfloor @apriciticreveries @bluemoonscape @tsukacchako @nottoonedin @paperstarry

side note that i genuinely put more effort into my analyses than i have ever put into any school essay ever

edit: FUCK I WAS SUPPOSED TO ANALYZE THE LYRICS AGAIN GOD DAMNIT i dont feel like doing that anymore ill just do it later maybe

[purinfelix]

hi!! I really love your work! I was wondering if you could do one where Gavi and the reader hate each other, but one day the reader had nobody to turn to so for some reason she found comfort with Gavi if that makes sense

i don't want to talk about anything ₊˚⊹ - pablo gavi

pairing: (academic rival) gavi x reader w/c: 1.5k a/n: ANON i love this idea and im sorry its been sitting in my inbox for so long - i decided to sort of involve it with the academic rivals fic i wrote, since it made sense to me, hope u don't mind! <3

No matter how many times you blinked, the words of your essay refused to stay still on the laptop in front of you, the feeling of your eyes growing tired only adding to your frustration. According to the irritatingly loud clock on the wall, you had been at the university library for almost five hours now, on top of an entire day of lectures and tutorials. Your head ached, and your mouth was dry ever since you had run out of water an hour ago but had been too engrossed in studying to go get more, and every time you closed your eyes you considered falling asleep right there and then. You hadn't even gone insane before, but you were pretty sure this was as close as you were going to get.

Forcing yourself to stand up you tried your best not to dwell on how unprepared you felt for your upcoming finals, or how many assignments you still had to finish. Even with how tired you were, your brain still managed enough energy to stress you out, even as you definitively shut the textbooks you had brought with you. You were more than aware of how childish this was, having thought you'd outgrown your ridiculous study methods years ago. But something about your recent dip in grade, how frustrated and helpless it made you feel, had spurred you into a frenzy you were too far into to stop. You couldn't recall the last spare hour you hadn't spent studying or the last conversation you had that hadn't been about exams.

Slinging your bag over your shoulder you reluctantly left the desk that had been your home for the majority of the evening. After a struggle, you managed to get the library doors open and were immediately. met with the miserably biting cold of the late winter night - the thought of the long trek back to your dorm room acting as salt in the wound. Your hands are already freezing as they dart into your jacket pocket in search of your phone, and you flick it on to check for any response to the many, many texts you had sent to your friends. Most of them were invited to study with you or questions about lectures, but all you were met with was a pathetically empty inbox, the reflection of your own tired face once it switched off, and the stinging realisation of just how isolated you had become, and how lonely you felt. Perhaps it was this, or the howling wind whipping around you, that caused tears to prick up in your eyes as you bit your lip painfully hard to stop them from falling.

You're overcome with a sudden desperation to get back to your dorm as quickly as possible before anyone can see you crying like an idiot. The added barrier of your own fatigue makes this difficult though, and the immense cold doesn't help. Before you know it though you're already halfway there, passing by the campus football court which is still brightly lit and lively despite how late it's getting - a fact you curse as you make out a familiar figure, and the single last person you want to see right now.

Gavi seems to spot you too and even though you hand your head to prevent any more tears, you can hear his loud footsteps as he leaves his friends and game to jog up to you. He calls out your name and the smug tone in his voice is enough for you to will your legs to move faster. When you don't stop, you hear him pause before running up to match your pace.

"Long day at the library, huh?" he jeers, walking beside you and clearly not taking any notice to the fact that you're not in the mood to entertain his ego. Usually, you would've jumped at the opportunity to flex your work ethic in his lazy face but not now, not with how you're feeling. All you wish is for him to leave you alone before he sees you crying and it gives him another thing to make fun of you for - but just as this entire day has turned out, your wishes are far from granted.

"You know, I did notice you've been slacking a little lately. Even I found the last quiz pretty easy and I could tell you struggled with it."

You scoff loudly at his words but don't offer a response in fear of him being able to tell something's off from the quiver you're bound to have. A small part of you does question why he's been paying so much attention to you lately but has little time to when you feel him reach out to grab your hand, suddenly jerking you back and stopping you in your tracks.

Finally, you crane your neck up without thinking and lock eyes with his, and you hear the next comment he was preparing catch in his throat. It happens so quickly that you almost don't notice it, but his smug expression softens immediately and you can almost make out the concern in his eyes once he sees your tear-stricken face. The contrast from the teasing way he normally looks at you is so stark it almost stops the flow of tears from your eyes, and you almost wish it had because now you're standing here sniffling like an idiot, and he's standing there watching you.

"Hey…" he mumbles, and the pity in his voice is enough to make you want to run away, even as he drops your hand. Still, you can tell he's not enjoying the awkward situation any more than you are but is trying his best.

"I'm fine," you blurt out instinctively, messily wiping the stream of tears from your cheeks before laughing - at what you're not entirely sure, but you're desperate for an opportunity to lighten the mood.

"You don't look it," he sounds so mature that it almost takes you aback.

You hang your head, half in shame and half so that you don't have to look into his eyes when you lie. "I'm just really tired."

It's almost irritating how sudden his movements can be and how easily they can catch you off guard, but his athleticism has never blended itself to subtlety. Still, it's hard not to be shocked when he pulls you once more and before you realise it you're enveloped in his arms, pulled flush against his chest. His body still radiates heat from the exercise he was just doing, a fact that you find comfort in. Before you can stop yourself, you're already sinking into his touch, its catharsis being exactly what you needed, but hadn't realised. You wrap your arms back around him and close your eyes as you rest your head against his chest. The rhythm of his heart is bold and quick as you listen to it, and you chalk this up to the exercise as well - an excuse you're not lucky enough to have for your own quickening heart.

He's the first to break the silence. "You're the smartest person I know, you know." He says it barely above a whisper, and he seems to be confessing more to the night sky than to you.

If you had just a little more pride in yourself, you might've met this with one of your usual jabs. Strangely enough though, all signs of the competitive nature you reserve for him have gone missing. Maybe it's because of your surprise that he seems to know exactly what you need to hear, but you're sure it's more because of how tired you are.

"Thank you," is all you can quietly muster up, but given how earnestly it comes out, you hope it'll be enough.

"I don't mean to stress you out, not just now but all the time. I'm sorry for that," he sighs, and you can tell without seeing his face that he really means it.

"It's alright, I appreciate it," you laugh softly, before adding, "sometimes."

He squeezes you a little harder and standing there in his arms, despite how mind-numbingly strange the situation is, you allow yourself to forget about some things for a bit. Forget about how late it is, about all the work you still have to do, about how you're not meant to like him at all, how you're hoping no one you know sees the two of you right now. For just a minute, the two of you share a world you had only gotten teasing glimpses of during your heated conversations in hallways, your quick comparisons after grades get released or quippy comebacks. Only now, not a single word needs to pass between you two - the sound of his beating heart and the strange sense of comfort that falls over you being all you need.

[after-witch]

Look I just got engaged and Im here to feed my own delusions SO (also I love your writing sm!!!)

"What on earth are you doing crashing my wedding like this?" - to Hisoka.

notes: yandere, blood, non-graphic violence

--

You're grateful for the fact that he showed up in your modest little bridal suite prior to the ceremony, rather than storming into the chapel as you were saying your vows.

He leans against the closed door--he locked it, too, you noticed--and gives you a familiar look of appraisal. There's pleasure in his eyes but something else, too. Something that is a little too reminiscent of the corner edge on a playing card.

"I'm stopping you from making a dumb mistake. You really think you're getting married to some low-tier nobody? Especially without my say-so?"

Your fist clenches in the delicate skirt of your gown until you remember how fragile it is--it belonged to your soon-to-be-spouse's grandmother--and you force your fingers to relax, smoothing out the antique lace.

"Why wouldn't I? We're in love."

Hisoka doesn't say anything for a moment.

Then he throws his head back and laughs until tears form in his eyes. They smudge his eyeliner.

"You might love them, darling, but I'm afraid the sentiment isn't quite returned. At least, not all that strongly. Certainly not strong enough for a wedding."

He wants you to ask. You don't want to ask.

But you do, anyway, because that's the game you've played with Hisoka for years. And he knows you always cave in.

"What do you mean?"

Hisoka pushes himself away from the door and approaches you. You know better than to run; the sticky memory of Bungee Gum crawls traitorously over your skin.

He doesn't stop until he's invading your space, until you've got nowhere to go unless you climb on top of the vanity behind you and use it as a seat.

"You do look pretty," he murmurs, leering down at you. "Are you wearing something nice underneath, for the honeymoon?" He leans in closer, a hand going to the fabric of your dress. "Can I check?"

You grimace and consider jabbing him with an eyeliner pencil left on the table behind you. It's not worth it--you might get some on your dress. You settle for smacking his hand away, and he lets you, pouting his lips at the pretend hurt.

"Hisoka. Answer my question."

Hisoka gives you one more appreciative glance before he grins.

"Ah! That. My dear, they began running the very moment I killed the priest at the alter. Didn't even try to help the old man." He grinned and ran a finger through his hair; a card appeared in his fingers and he flipped it back and forth. "I generously told them I was going for you next, and you know what they did?"

"Shut up!" You press your hands over your ears, but it doesn't blot out his words--the thought of the dead priest bleeding out--it doesn't blot out Hisoka.

"They ran out of the church and didn't even look back."

It's your wedding day and your priest is dead and the love of your life left you to die.

"Someone," you force out, voice croaking, mind scrambling for purchase on some bit of hope. "Someone else will come for me." Your mind frantically races over the guest list. Your future father-in-law, he would surely come running up the stairs. Or your uncle and your cousins. Or your friends. One of the other priests at the church, who would do anything to save an innocent like you.

"Oh, sweetness." Hisoka's voice is thick with honey.

He leans in close and brushes the flat end of the card against your cheek. There's something warm and wet on it, and a metallic tinge forces its way into your nostrils.

"What makes you think anyone is still alive down there?"

[thewertsearch]

GG: i think you are projecting your own attitude on to others […] GG: rose just sent me a code for a crystal ball, shes my friend and is basically the best! […] CA: its probably a trap i wwouldnt trust her CA: she is a cunnin and treacherous sort trust me i knoww her type GG: wait do you have a thing for her too??? GG: did she reject you or something?

Annihilate him, Jade. This would be a good time to unleash that rage you've been cultivating.

CA: all of her FRAUDULENT MAGICS cannot come close to posin threat to my mastery ovver the TRUEST SCIENCES CA: an wwith my empiricists wwand i servve as the righteous hope that wwill incinerate delusion and the deluded alike

This dude's on some Methods of Rationality type shit.

I'm not sure why Eridan is on a crusade against magic. He's been insisting it was fake since his original introduction page, and it's pretty clear he has some sort of complex about it. Is there some unseen history here that we're not yet privy to?

GG: wow what are you talking about CA: so really you should be honored to inherit my old callin CA: both my armaments and my feud

To be fair to Eridan, he is accomplishing something useful here, even if it's by accident. Jade needs to get that rifle in her pen-pal's hands in order to fulfil the Endgame Bunny's time loop.

Recalling Eridan’s introduction reminds me that this is one of the most powerful riflekind weapons in existence. This should imply that top-tier weapons cost tens of millions of grist...

...but we just saw a weapon that costs much, much more.

Maybe the Proton Cannon has the same damage as the Crosshairs, but it also has an incredibly broken non-combat use.

GG: i have seen this before […] GG: i am very sure its the same rifle included with johns present […] CA: probably a cheap imitation of the original […] GG: i did not provide the weapons! GG: my penpal did […] GG: we worked on it together but he supplied the bunnys weapons GG: im pretty sure hes from the future! CA: wwhy GG: because he said hes my grandson

Really?

I suppose being raised by a Sburb veteran would explain why he uses terms like 'boonbuck' in casual speech - but almost nothing else makes sense when viewed through this lens.

If Pen-Pal is Jade's grandson, then he should be from decades in the future - presumably long after the game has ended. This doesn't sound like a problem, until you remember some of the references he made.

As much as it pains me to admit it, the Earth is probably gone for good - which means that any descendants of our Players will be raised somewhere else. Why would someone presumably raised in a completely different universe be so familiar with Earth's culture?

You could argue that he picked up his love of Earth movies from one of the surviving Earthlings, such as adult John - although that raises its own issues, because PP talks to John like he's never met him before. Maybe he died young, and passed his love of movies to PP posthumously - but as you can see, we're really having to stretch things to make this make sense.

Plus, there's an even bigger problem - namely, his 1920s 'accent'. None of the surviving Earthlings have it, and it's not like he just developed it spontaneously. If he was raised by Jade or her child, why does he talk like her grandfather would?

See, I'm still sure that PP is connected directly to Grandpa, and may well be the man himself - which means either PP is lying, or there's something more complicated going on here.

We don't know anything about Grandpa's life after he fled the Crocker household. If he was somehow raised by an adult, post-Sburb Jade, then he could consider her his grandmother, while still talking and acting like the Grandpa Harley we know. Plus, it would explain why he acts like he's from the past, but knows about the future. He already has a history of time travelling - maybe he's been doing it since he was a kid.

Similar to my old theory about Spades Slick, this one is a little too convoluted to be 100% true - but still I think there's something to this idea. Being raised by Jade would neatly explain where he got the bunny's weapons...

Ugh, I don't know! This Pen-Pal really is the biggest curveball this comic has thrown at me. I need to think it over some more.

[phneltwrites]

Writing tag game!

thank u @tencrimes for the tag 💚

1.How many works do you have on AO3?

159. haha

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

1359725 (ok actually an aside about this. im pretty consistent it's about 250k a year give or take)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Right now just YR and adjacent

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

all of these are mdzs fics for wangxian

Love is More Than Telling Me You Want It: my structural inequality, yin imbalance cultivation magnum opus. 99k because I deleted 300 words so it wouldn't hit over 100. It's the first omegaverse fic I wrote and that was a learning curve and nothing I ever write will be this popular again and that's fine. Also an amazing moment in being like i have communicated my intent!!! when a lovely commenter was like hey are you familiar with this feminist theory of the abject and i waslike MY DUDE I AM LITERALLY BUILDING ON THAT YESSSS. anyway nerd moment

Yeah I Know How You Like It: telepathy sex. yes i did write this sort of out of spite because so many people were like haha lan wangji horny jail and then i was lke have you CONSIDERED that the false dichotomy between honourable and shameful desire is what caused lwj to initially reject wwx and live in a state of internal conflict and internalised hatred and only when he was able to be like no i want him and i love him and i respect him and i want to do these things to him was he able to actually love wwx and be loved in return. also. it's hot.

your persuasions: yeah big dick fic with all the programming jokes

the earthquake in the room: toast fic! what a... experience posting this fic was. anyway uni au engineer/literature student romance

wild for your skin: cnc pwp. glad it found its people

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! Barring some unforeseen circumstance. I know a lot of people don't and there's no one right way but it's important to me to try, i write fic because we're all in the space together and commenting and responding to comments is how I stitch the fabric of fandom

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't think I write angsty endings as a rule... also trying to answer these I keep going through my ao3 like i wrote that??? i have no memory of this place

maybe my Eleanor/Tahani from The Good Place fic which ends with them together (yay) but the situation is that they are still struggling with the loss of Chidi's memories and his love and also that they haven't fixed the afterlife.

NO WAIT it's the John Wick fic I wrote about Helen because it ends with her deciding she'll help John Wick get out of the life (I made her chief Operator in this fic) but WE know as readers that she dies later.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

mmm maybe my yr post-s3 fluff fic where they picnic by the lake and are full of joy and happiness

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I get so much more love on my fic than anything else. And a lot of people who were brave and wrote their first comments which can be super intimidating.

9. Do you write smut?

yeah :) i like to write holistic life fic

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

yes! I also write fusions. My craziest crossover was a Princess Bride one where I took Inigo and Fezzik across a bunch of fandoms including Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries and Pacific Rim

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Had them reposted on wattpad but no one's claimed them to be theirs as far as i know

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! oh hm looks like there's no easy way to see which ones have translations...

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, twice! One beach volleyball pwp (the one time the beach volleyball was literal and not a metaphor) and one Leverage fic. Both experiences were totally different because the pwp we wrote together on voice chat, so that was simultaneous writing and the Leverage fic was done async, by drafting sections and then rewriting them and reorganising them.

yes, that's right. smut written on voice chat.

14. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

My avatar/pacific rim fusion... I love that fic, love the worldbuilding, lost my fandom love right before the last chunk of plot and haven't gone back. I dream of it though. They were finally gonna drift together.

15. What are your writing strengths?

I think my writing strengths are extended metaphors, smut, and. yeah i guess that's the set. Wait. Worldbuilding. i dunno. i don't think i have strengths...

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

My sentences are really short and that can make the writing choppy.

I'm also working on my pacing I like a fic that clips along but right now my fic can feel like being strapped to the top of a high speed train and I'd like a bit more breathe in there, but I'm not really sure how

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

this is such an odd question like sure? if it's fun? ok actually i DO have thoughts on this if the characters are already speaking that language and then words are sprinkled in I think that breaks immersion but also. do what you want. I do that myself with pet names sometimes. like sure i studied some philosophy of translation stuff but fundamentally i don't care i am here to make macrame.

18. First fandom you wrote for?

Leverage! The first fic i wrote is up on ao3 "The Offside Trap Job"

19. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I think it's falling til 4 a.m. which is my 90s Seattle radio host/barista wangxian au. I had a really specific vibe of longing and disconnect that I wanted to capture and I think I did. Also I did a lot of 90s research and got told it felt right so that felt nice. idk it's a really personal one despite it not being about my life. But sometimes you're far from the people that used to be your people but you can listen to them talking and it's the thinnest of lifelines.

tagging @in-amor-veritas @grounded-parasocial @gulliblelemon @malinowaj @caramelpenguin @bigalockwood @enjoythesilentworld

[crushedsweets]

can you tell us more about what Ben's life was like before his death?? (family, friends, and so on)(and what happened to them after his death bc oh sweet sweet angst)

ben was my gateway into creepypasta and i am living for your content of him (and your cp content in general) 😭🙏🏻

i havent thought TOO deeply about this actually!! so im gonna just spout what i HAVE thought about and see what i can build while im here!

as per usual, everything is in my AU; Creeped! info in my pinned if curious. CW in this post for murder, suicide, violence, the usual

ok. from the get-go i knew ben was gonna be an only child living in the suburbs. his parents would be pretty average folks, maybe his dad is a plumber and his mom is a secretary at a dentists office . . . he's a little spoiled, considering he's an only child. doesnt do chores, always getting electronics for holidays, most of his meals are made for him. i imagine his grandparents spoil him even more, as he's their only grandkid - something about him screams no cousins either... HES GOT NOBODYYY

i specifically imagine him living in a neighborhood like this. but with tons of toys hanging out on the lawn from when he was young and his parents are too lazy/busy to toss them. all rotting under the sun cuz hes stuck inside on his games

i imagine i has a small circle of friends at school... the type to go ride bikes after school to the corner store, buy hella soda and snacks, then ride home to go play video games.

he's def a bit dorky/geeky and doesnt have a lot of friends, just hangs around at school trading pokemon cards and failing his math tests and eating cheetos.

i think ben wouldve been 'just' missing for a while, but i think that his parents would have lost their minds. organized massive search parties, gone door to door with photos of ben pleading with everyone.

its fucked up but. im thinking. bens mom knocks on the door of the man who killed ben. the man is weird, a recluse, visibly uncomfortable the second he sees her face - she's been all over the news begging for ben to come home, after all. and theres a stench, and everything about this house is just Off and dirty and gross, and the entry way has a pile of boots and slippers and sandals just sitting around - all belonging to the man - but she notices a pair of awfully familiar sneakers.

i think it would be upsetting if she saw the shoes that she bought for ben, began to stammer, the man noticed, and he goes to attack her. she screams and freaks out and barely manages to get away, the man is freaking out and gets in his truck and goes to drive off, huge police-chase ensues, and the cops raid his house. i think the man would shoot himself before the cops could get him, something that would destroy bens family to no end.

while going through his house for evidence, theyd find ben's rotting corpse in the tub - dressed up in the link gear - alongside the majoras mask catridge. and theyd begin to find other remains around the house, all belonging to missing blonde teens around the county/state.

i think its obvious the sort of turmoil and strain this would have on his family(parents+grandparents), but it would be really tough on his friends too. theyre all freshmen in highschool and there would be a ton of rumors, distasteful jokes, etc at Ben's expense - partially from his own friends not knowing how to cope, partially from strangers.

and i dont think ben would be able to witness any of this grief as its happening. OBVIOUSLY he's dead, but his spirit is trapped in the same majoras mask cartridge that ends up getting stuck in evidence.

i think he'd eventually go back to watch all the interviews, news recordings, etc that he can find. and i think he'd try to pretend it doesnt bug him. he's so beyond shitty with his emotions, even as a human - super quick to make a joke out of everything, laugh it all off, in fear of being a 'pussy' or being vulnerable or getting made fun of. cuz he was the type to make fun of other boys for the same stuff. so yk. but the outlet he'd use for his emotions would be hurting people. tormenting, 'trolling', cyberbullying, haunting people all around the nation and driving them to murder, suicide, other things. generally being Evil and thinking its all just a joke. he cant take anything serious

i dont think he'd talk about his family to the creeps. and looking at him, nobody has a damn clue who he is or why he's like That. but he'd accidentally let his last name slip in a random convo, someone would be nosy enough to google it, and the news would quickly spread around the creeps and proxies who know him. not that theyd try and address it or something, but it would 100% leave everyone a little bit like. Oh. That's really sad. esp cuz they all thought he was just an annoying little asshole

[rontra]

tell me more about these OCs. What’s their deal. How’s life where they live. Do they have games on their phones

the 4 dipshits i drew yesterday are from one of the oldest oc settings ive got (they were minted from the forge of stupid fuckheads in the year of our lord 2011) (and i'm very mean to them<3)

so because it's so old a lot of my followers will recognize them or even be familiar with previous iterations of their story/lore... there's been like. 3 discreet incarnations of it by now. and 3.0 needs some serious aid so this might be 4.0 now. so basically things people know may or may not be canon anymore. i just go in there and sift thru the entrails like fnaf mangle when im bored its my toys

but basically they live in chess world. and they all hate it. and life is bad. because of the Forever War. we should put a stop to that. but the Powers That Be are very picky about the steps that need to be taken to End the Forever War so that part sucks too. also because its chess world everybody has a lil rank and title and has to go perish on the battlefield or whatever

yesterday''s posts,

these two assholes are flang (blonde) and kaitlin (has games on her phone). they're part of the group of 4 main characters with kaitlin serving as the "guy everyone gives exposition to" vehicle, because she just got here, because it's also an isekai (surprise!). so she owns a phone and has games on it but she can't use it anymore because there's no phone service in Chess World. sad!

her rank is king (she/her king W), which means she has a lot of responsibilities in a lot of areas--none of which she wants or really signed up for, but her fun new wife (the black queen) just kinda recruited her into it. in the setting, king/queen are primarily military titles, then government positions; it is not necessary to be royalty "by blood", hence these unruly (albeit rare since there can only be one of each at a time) pawn-to-queen and pawn-to-king promotions happening on the board. she also has a cursed sword that is surprisingly unrelated to all of that but it has magic powers

flang (they/she) is From chess world and has grown up in alabaster. her mother is a doctor so she is too. her rank is pawn. she has a lot of issues and almost all of them are because alabaster sucks ass to live in if you're even like 1% outside of what alabaster considers Proper. it's a "reasonably stable and reasonably safe" kingdom to live and work in, but that safety and stability is always conditional; it's only stable and safe if you're born 100% conforming to it or discard your existing self to assimilate into it. this has made flang a very precious kind of insane that hurts them and everybody around them all of the time. but it can be repaired by defecting from the country, scaring their family, getting a fun haircut, almost succumbing to a fever, and finally the tender touch of a lesbian who has games on her phone

the other two people in the Main 4 are aster (kaitlin's wife, queen) and erin (the other queen) and are NOT the people i drew yesterday (BDHJBGS)

this is aster and erin 👇

you can tell because they have the look of 2 people who have been ruining each other for like a decade now and arent gonna stop until they change or die

aster (she/they) is trying to kill the white king for Revenge Reasons and ending the forever war is just like a cool side effect for her. she's the one who got kaitlin into all of this mess which is complicated because on the one hand, she got kaitlin into all of this mess and is trying to strongarm her into doing things she absolutely doesn't want to do (like killing people). on the other hand though, being roped into all of this mess did pretty directly save kaitlin's life in the first place and somehow loops back around to improving her mental health in the long run. so who's to say whether big murder plots that only you like and want are bad to do or not

erin (she/her) is normal about that freak^ but is in a very bad position because aster getting kaitlin on the board and starting their big dumb plan is a very clear signal to erin that aster has already won, long before anyone else thinks that. erin doesn't really gaf about the white king but she has other things she cares about and is willing to die to protect. to erin, aster's victory means she's on borrowed time and it won't be long before aster will go Through Her to get what they want. there's a confrontation on the horizon where erin fully believes one of them will kill the other one. but also they're like in love. but also erin has way better gfs available. you understand

the two other bitches i drew yesterday are NOT in the main 4 theyre just some other freaks . this is zarni (short hair) and fal (blonde) 👇

faolan (she/her) is the white queen's bishop which means she's the piece closest to the queen--basically shes erin's right hand arm man. she's erin everything. her confidant. her best friend. her silly rabbit. (is that what erin calls her?) no.

fal WANTS to be all of those things and has a weird crush on the queen but erin never lets anybody in and that includes fal. but basically faolan is the bitch who's always in it for Rank And Power and has climbed as high as she can and is still vying for erin's personal approval and acknowledgement because nothing's ever enough for her. she sucks to hang out with and almost dies very badly but zarni has her back

zarni (she/her) isnt actually from either kingdom she's with the unrelated third party pirate faction that mostly keeps to itself and has its own squabbles and drama that doesn't really have anything to do with the Forever War. an outlaw... a GRIMINAL... she met faolan way back when fal was much lower rank than she is now. fal was escorting her to the capital to receive basically a slap on the wrist for doing crimes in alabaster territory and they kinda hit it off in a weird way. right now zarni is technically like. fal's hired muscle. her right hand arm man (henchman edition). but for zarni it mostly doubles as a convenient way to have free passage into and within alabaster, for her own sidequest reasons. she ends up saving fal's stupid life because unfortunately they care about each other now and it's embarrassing for everyone. but maybe it'll distract faolan from looking at erin just long enough for her to realize she needs a big strong woman to carry her off into the sunset and build her a cottage where she can fucking retire already. or something. one can dream

anyway that's the people i drew yesterday (and the 2 in the middle that i didnt even draw but i would feel neglectful if i didnt mention). ssorry for the long post i just love talking about my ocs and these ones are 13 years old so talking about them comes Very Easily To Me MDJBSBJGS

i skimped on details just to get thru the tl;dr basics but i hope it was at least entertaining (and if anyone has more questions after this i dont mind i know i skipped a lot HDHBJG)

to me this is an oc setting entirely populated by stupid assholes who are constantly ruining at least 1 other character's life in some way. and that's how they all save each other. and that's beautiful. godbless our beautiful gay chess soldiers

[freakenomenon]

Hi friend :] I want to understand Ellen as a character better and you seem to have a good grasp on her, so could I ask about your ideas for her? No pressure though either !

YOURE ASKING ME ABOUT MY IDEAS FOR ELLEN?? IVE WAITED YEARS FOR SOMEONE TO ASK ME ABOUT MY IDEAS FOR ELLEN!!! /REF .. AGAIN

OKAY to start off. the biggest thing i noticed about her in particular that is pointed out better in the manual than it is displayed in the game is the fact she would rather run away or ignore a problem than actually deal with it and heal. and if you combine this with the fact she usually reacts to ( and CONFUSES ) her own fear with anger. or hostility.

stating herself that she hates crying because she knows she doesnt feel "sad" ,, she just wants to kicks someones ass. which is probably a trauma response. considering she grew up in a rather unsafe neighborhood, which resulted in the death of her brother and cousin. IM JUST RESTATING CANON HERE BUT MY POINT IS.

i feel like if in the game they reeled in the part of her character that is very clearly avoidant, distant and even frequently disassociative. they'd have. a character.

alongside the fact that it's implied she very clearly cannot grasp the concept of not being able to handle something. she's overcome almost everything in her life, but the moment she can't understand another humans feelings. or why another human would treat her the way. most of the people in her life have.

she's more familiar with algorithms than people after all. not to mention that nimdok ( ugh. ) says that ellen is honest to the point of being offensive. first of all fucking. Jesus autistic much. secondly this could also be due to her isolating herself and feeling more at home with her work and electronics than she is with people. a computer is easily fixable if she ends up fucking something up.

its not like you can remove a rom chip on a person and reprogram it to not feel insulted if you tell them they look like they have a dirty microwave. that is probably an oversimplification of my thoughts on that part, but you get the point.

now. to. just. get this part of her character out of the way. just. warning for mentions of rape , miscarriages and other nasty things ahead.

i am not saying that in the situation where someone were to rewrite the game. you have to completely remove the aspect of her being a victim of rape. i simply just think it could've been approached in a better way. as I've stated many times. personally i don't even know where to start with rewriting this aspect of her character??? the most i have is replacing the maintenance man with someone she might have known. just to add more to what I have. maybe a boss or coworker she was close with who exploited their position above her both in the workplace and within the more obvious racial bias of society at the time. using it against her as an excuse to break her boundaries, break down her defenses, and eventually take advantage of her. something like that. just so it has more of an impact on her as a whole, and make her relationship with intimacy and relationships with humans , platonic or not. more strained. having to scratch and fight with the core of her being that wants. and deserves proper intimacy and general care. to keep herself safe. to prevent herself from being violated like that again. her vulnerability is what caused her to end up in that spot. she cant let that happen again. she cant be a hopeless victim again. not again.

yknow because thats how trauma works. it actually effects the victims life in ways other than just ending up with fucked up trigger and a fucked up phobia. wow.

now to the other part of this. I'm. going to be so honest. I would just scrap the miscarriage stuff and the existence of eddie as a whole.

it's so meaningless and minuscule in her character that i bet my pinky toe that half the fandom would look at you like you just said something TED levels of crazy if you brought it up without further grueling context.

.. that's. actually all I've got for now if you trim off me just asking to further establish aspects of her character that i think are interesting. if you've got any questions ill be more than happy to answer! <3

[woahrarepairsagemare]

I'm sad and angry

_

Getting to know what is probably your best friend , just in a different flavor , different font , different personality , different everything , is weird .

Sabre didn't know what he expected when he chose to talk to Rainbow here , the lie he passed off was lame as hell , but maybe the rogue of the blackhole dimension believed it because he wanted a friend .

Being alone in a universe like this can take a toll on you .

Strolling with him through the fields of this weird worm hole was oddly calming . He was polite but oddly distant and strangle uncanny and Sabre had a sinking feeling that he wasn't talking to the opposite of the actual rainbow , since he probably was in front of the real rainbow .

After making another one of his silly jokes and causing Rainbow to giggle uncannily , Sabre stopped with Rainbow at a cliff overlooking a kingdom whixh looked all too familiar , but he made sure to not comment on it . Who knows what could cause this unstable entity to go insane .

' Haha , you're so funny .. I think I like you , I think I'll let you not suffer ! '

It was hard to not feel chills go down his spine ad he heard Rainbow say that so casually . A burning question did appear in his head though after hearing those words and bounced around in it , annoying the hell out of Sabre .

'Is something wrong friend ? '

Sabre heard Rainbow's enquiry and he was torn between venting out his feelings and just shaking his head , smiling and pretending he was fine . This was his best friend , so why was he still not speaking ?

Or was it his best friend .. ?

Well , if it truly was him , it would be worth a shot .

Here goes everything .

' Hey .. quick question . '

Sabre almost winced as Rainbow turned his head to him like an owl would , blinking those uncanny eyes at him . He avoided eye contact as Rainbow curiously tilted his head to the side as if he were listening .

' I'm all ears . '

' .... why are you not imprisoning me and torturing me ? Don't villains do that - ?! '

He blurted out and immediately wished he hadn't .

_

Rainbow stared at Sabre , blinking uncannily at him as he asked . Wow , if there had been any other villain in his place they would've blasted Sabre's head off . It was almost humorous ..

No .

It was humorous .

Rainbow chuckled unsettlingly before patting Sabre's shoulder in a way that was oddly comfortable , much to Sabre' s dismay .

'Im not a tyrannical villain , why would I do that ? '

Rainbow took note of the way Sabre relaxed upon hearing that . His expressions sorted slightly but still looked vaguely un-steve-like as he continued to talk to Sabre . He tilted his head back to its position as Sabre continued .

'It's just that .. people who - are like villains just go and capture people they like to use them if you know what I mean bro ?? And you seem like a villain .. '

Rainbow knew he should've been mad at sabre but he wasnt , the game they were playing was odd . Pretending to not know the man he considered a brother was not exactly alright with him either ..

But he persisted .

He laughed and shook his head

' chicken steve ( nice alias Sabre , but it kinda sounds stupid ) , I'm petty , not down right evil . '

He sighed before sitting down on the tufts of grass and patting a spot beside him as if inviting Sabre to chat .

" I like you , you're my friend . I would love to have you be my side kick , but i can't be selfish chicken steve . You have a family that's waiting for you , and if not , you have a number of endless possibilities , friends , pets , and whatever to look forward to . By keeping you by my side , I'd be stripping you of your wings . You can't make a bird fly if you trim its wings . '

He chided softly ,before patting sabre on the shoulder .

' Im not a rogue enemy sabre , I'm your friend and I will be . Everyone can be a friend and everyone can be a foe , and even then I'll remain as unselfish as possible . I'm just a petty rogue upto no good . '

...

Since when did this rainbow realize that he was actually called sabre ?

[the-chessboard-is-personal]

i am so normal about PET team hermitcraft10

sO NORMAL

like i KNOW the symbolism is fake and im just incapable of letting go of Do2 as a concept

but whAT IF

you THINK about it

Tango created Do2, Etho won it, and Pearl figured out the secret message. Those are. Special things i thgink

and those three specifically are a group in s10.

and it's obviously because they're friends with each other and just normal reasons !!

but. consider THIS

The Creator, the Winner and the Queen

Surprise Fanfic attack!

Season 9 didn't really... end.

Well, it did, but small pieces of it were still lingering. Clinging to the future in what tiny, subtle ways they could.

Mumbo's title cards were, somehow, one of the things they were latched onto the most. But after a while of living on — or even just Watching the server, you'd know to expect him to be... unorthodox.

<Mumbo walked into the danger zone due to Llama>

But there were other things. There always was. For one, there was Demise. The last little pieces of not only Season 6, but also the Life series, although Grian would deny that if ever asked. It was only fair to give the new guys something they were used to, to adjust them to the new experience.

But there was something else as well.

The postal service was another one of those pieces of the past. Or, at least, its founders were. They never talked about it, the style of the build never reflected it, but as anyone familiar with the server's antics would know, when you create an entity that's true nature is beyond comprehension even to yourself, it follows you.

Tango knew. He knew the other two knew. He knew they knew he knew. Or, at least, he thought they knew.

With the way the postal office was built, wandering its cozy halls on occasion felt like traversing a maze. All three of them knew this. They each thought they were the only one who knew there was a why.

Of course Tango knew. He knew everything about that beast, the presence that had made itself known in the Citadel, that which he himself created, and yet somehow also didn't. He knew it all. Or, at least, that's what he told everyone last season. What he told himself.

Etho knew. He knew the familiarity of what the building made him feel. He knew whenever he held a piece of gold, hesitating just a moment to feel the memories come a little closer. But he only ever allowed himself that moment. It was a gold block, not a trophy.

Pearl knew. She was the one to figure it out, after all. The message wasn't important back then, when that word, that name, had a real owner. But she had to have known why she, ever so subtly, could never stop thinking about that name as she opened the door to the office.

If any of them slept in there, they dreamt of ice and fire, those two distinct roars they knew so well, of ghostly laughs and those tolling bells. It was a chaos they all knew too well. Of running through halls like power running through a circuit like the strange aura running through the River.

They had been here before. They had been to this building they'd never seen and she'd just built, the house was new but the home felt ancient. And they were happy. They were haunted by something that wouldn't ever let go of the server fully, and they welcomed it.

Pearl gave a soft laugh whenever she was walking alone in the building and saw the movement of horns from the edge of her vision, or mistook a satchel on a shelf for a golden crown adorned with eight spikes and four claws. Etho gave a smug but friendly smile, unseen to all but the one it was intended for when he thought he heard the distant whistle of a note block, or the soft clatter of a key from a dropper. Tango was comforted by the darkening of the air, a presence that was ominous but a few months ago now felt more like a reassurance that a friend hadn't left, like a hand placed softly on an uncertain shoulder.

They all knew it was intentional. Fate spun by a place that had played games with them as much as they had with it, yet it brought them together to show its compassion, or perhaps, its gratitude.

[vikkirosko]

i did read the rules for requests, but im still not sure if this is a 'do-able' request but im gunna shoot my shot and ask any way? So, primitively, i'm sorry if this is weird and convoluted maybe. I know Sollux is dead before the human players get to the meteor, but for the sake of this, can we assume its an AU where Gamzee doesn't snap? I wanted to get something done for a GN reader who shows up with their players and is just immediately overwhelmed with the amount of people around now after spending so much time alone and ends up just gravitating towards Sollux because he isn't loud or boisterous and isn't constantly going out of his way trying to fill quadrants with everyone in sight (i know he has more than everyone else, but he isnt *actively* doing it) and its just more comfortable to be around him than the other humans and trolls and just kinda watches him do his stuff. They're pretty quiet until they've got a question about his code or something going on in the background they don't have context for, so they aren't actually super annoying, but have accidentally made him their emotional support alien xD QvQ I just really like the idea of chilling sitting beside him and pretending existence isn't as doomed as it is.

I don't see any problem here

♊️ Sollux Captor ♦️human gn!Reader headcanons Peace and quiet 🐝

Starting the game with your friends, you expected anything, but not that there would be even more of you. There were five of you when you started, and then there were even more of you, because you joined a group of trolls, and now you just couldn't stand being in the midst of all this chaos. You lived alone almost all your life, and only your guardian periodically appeared in your house, and now you were among a large number of people and it was too hard for you emotionally. That's why you turned your attention to Sollux

He was the calmest of all those who were there, even Dave, whom you used to consider the calmest of your acquaintances, now made a lot of noise when communicating with Karkat. Sollux preferred peace and quiet, and you hoped that he would not mind spending time with you. Sollux didn't expect you to start spending time with him, but you made a lot less noise than your friends, so he didn't mind you sitting with him

You and Sollux were sitting quietly together. You didn't bother him with unnecessary conversations and he was really comfortable with your company, and you were comfortable with him, while the others continued to make noise and cause you stress. But gradually the relationship between you became more and more friendly when you started asking him about the code that he wrote, or asked about what your friends were doing when you didn't understand at all what exactly they were doing. Your questions didn't annoy him, because you didn't ask him very often about something and it wasn't difficult for him to answer your questions, especially when it came to what he himself was interested in

You didn't fully understand why yourself, but you were more comfortable with him, an unfamiliar alien, than with your friends whom you had known for a long time. But you continued to communicate with Sollux, becoming a friend with him that you could trust. You didn't understand the specifics of troll relationships, but you didn't need to. You were friends who were comfortable around each other

Your friends sometimes joked that Sollux was your emotional support alien, but neither of you cared much. He felt comfortable around you, he knew that you wouldn't bother talking to him when he didn't want to talk, and you felt more comfortable in silence when you were spending time with Sollux. He really was for you the very emotional stability that you needed when the world your familiar world was bursting at the seams

[stuffzwithazz]

little hu analysis time!

i love hu, she’s grown on me a lot since pt2 dropped ehehe heh i’d like to make a formal apology to her for thinking she was the culprit for a year

this is just an analysis about hu’s secret/secret quote because i’m a freshman sem 1 psychology major and i like this stuff ^^

spoilers for drdt obviously ^^

tw for suicide

as a quick recap: hu’s secret is “you were quite the hopeless child. dying once wasn’t enough, so you attempted suicide 3 times” and her secret quote is “i want to pay for what i did. but i still want to live” (something like that)

i’ll start w the secret quote bc it’s the simpler one^^

by “pay for what i did” i think she means laying up her life as comeuppance for her actions, whatever they might be. now im not sure if by attempted, it’s failed attempts or hu wanting to but chickening out at the last minute. either way my point stands

now onto the secret!! this is a bit of assumption and i could just be looking into it wayyy too much but ykw? its fun!

there’s one specific phrase i’d like to look at: “*dying once wasn’t enough*, so you attempted suicide 3 times”

if the wording is meant to be very specific, then this raises a question. those question being; what does she mean by “dying once”?

for this next part: spoilers for both corpse factory (the game) and the silent patient (a book by alex michaelides)

i’ll explain it in brief terms w/out any spoilers after those sections dw!! i just like using examples for things

CORPSE FACTORY SPOILERS:

near the end, noriko talks about aoi’s childhood and how aoi is under the impression that noriko’s childhood was better (it wasn’t but i digress) noriko mentions aoi said something like “my dad killed me, but i killed him, so it’s okay.” ignoring the last bit, what does aoi mean by “killed me?”

aoi’s dad was quite the violent and both verbally and physically abusive guy. there are things that people can say that are equivalent or even worse than being stabbed or shot upfront, like things such as

(tw for verbal abuse(?) i actually dk how to categorize these im sorry)

“i wish you were never born” or “i wish you died instead of ____!!”

these things hurt like hell, and in some cases you feel like it would have been better to literally be murdered

SILENT PATIENT SPOILERS

near the end of the book, alicia recounts the experience she had growing up with her dad and how one day, he killed her. sound familiar? it’s a similar story to what happened with aoi. then, when alicia writes in her diary about what theo did 5 years ago, she brings up this specific thing: theo had made gabriel choose between himself or alicia post finding out gabriel was having an affair w kathy. gabriel chose his own life over alicia’s, therefore proving he did cheat and shattering alicia’s hopes that gabriel really did love her. in her mind, it felt like being killed. again. in her words, “the dead doesn’t speak. gabriel has sentenced me to death.” hearing that the man who she loved for so long was going behind her back and would choose his life over her’s, when she knew she would value his is worse than being just brutally killed.

(SPOILERS OVER!!)

being said something so hurtful it feels like a stab in the stomach is a similar feeling that i think is the reasoning for the specific words of “dying once wasn’t enough”

im admittedly a bit sad that hu’s secret wasn’t talked about whatsoever during the trial, especially considering its subject matter, but it’s what she wanted so it’s okay

again, all of this is purely speculation on my part, and o could just be looking into the wording a bit too much…

ok analysis over!! lmk what you think ^^

[spiteful-studios]

PLEASE- I just wanted to get some love from these two boiz- and all I got was a target on mah bootiful forehead-

HOW DARE YOU-

I'm just kidding, what is the lore of this? What made you target our foreheads? 😊

if it makes you feel any better, i happen to be the CEO of having a massive dome so you're in great company—

anyways explanation under the cut !!

the reason we decided to go with something as innocuous as your forehead to pick on you for is for a.) inclusivity and b.) time appropriate discrimination. its important to remember that the game takes place in the seventies in the united states. the social environment for the school would be a lot different than the social environment that we would see in a more modern high school; namely, one of the things we discussed pretty early on in our discussion of worldbuilding for our dating sim was how we were going to tackle the discrimination that one would probably experience in a high school at this time. i know we do have some players who may not be as familiar with united states politics around this time, but the civil rights act, which banned segregation in public spaces, was passed in the mid-sixties ( be nice to me its been like ten years since ive studied american history ) so depending on when we think glass hearts takes place in the seventies, we might be fresh off segregation. and there are other factors to consider, such as how racism looks in southern states versus northern states and how that would translate to an academic setting, nevermind the sexism you may face if you're afab or visibly queer. so that brought the question: do we ignore period appropriate discrimination?

if i can get personal for a second— im bipoc and i love the sixties and seventies for their aesthetic, the vernacular, it just so happens that i really like it. but im someone who grew up with a lot of discrimination around videogames. its frustrating, for example, to play a game with an all-white cast where the self-insert main character is a little petite white girl when i am, in fact, a plus-sized black woman. Or playing games in which the only people of color i see are complete stereotypes rather than actual characters. i was pretty upfront with my partner that i didnt want to us to create a game that isolated people of color the way that i felt isolated growing up. so, blatantly putting anything discriminatory against anyone was not on the table for either of us. it would have been period appropriate, sure, but it wouldnt have been a fun experience no matter what avenue we went down with it. but i also felt like it was . . . weird not to have any reference to the discriminatory nature of a school environment at that time ?? i kind of struggle to put it into words necessarily, but it feels reductive to just not include anything about the discriminatory nature of schools at that time for people in vulnerable populations ?? like, for example, homophobia is not so insignificant that i can just write it out of a time period and we are none the wiser. while i would love to live in a world where homophobia doesnt exist it is just unrealistic, and writing around it diminishes opportunities to show characters growing from prejudice views, or explain struggles that some audiences ( like myself and my partner, for example ) can really resonate with. so that brings us back to the main question: how do we write discrimination without actively discriminating against anyone ??

the forehead bit.

it was kind of a joke that meg and i spitballed when we were in the early phases of writing the script ( specifically lou tenant making that forehead joke early in the game. the way meg read that out had me dying laughing when we were in the early stages ) that just stuck, but it really worked out to accomplish what we were trying to accomplish !! because the forehead bit is annoying. we can write it in ways that make it easy to play it off for laughs and make it something that we can all giggle about, but the constant repetition gives this impression that certain characters are judging you off a character that the main character cannot control or change, or that they're poking fun of a feature that is unique to you. if you want to read into it in a more serious light like meg and i are more prone to do with the media that we consume, then the forehead joke can be seen as a microaggression and expanded upon. but for people who are not interested in that, they can just laugh, groan, or roll their eyes and move on with the story. its also such a specific insult that there's minimal risk of retraumatizing anyone with that comment, and it still harkens back to the microaggressions you may face based on your sexuality, ethnicity, race, etc. we didnt want to isolate any particular audience by making anything more specific than that— anyone can have a big forehead regardless of gender, sexuality, ethnicity, etc.

so, in short because i rambled a lot in this response, it basically serves as environmental storytelling to write discrimination without writing discrimination. whether we were successful is entirely at the digression of the audience; i just know that meg and i have been trying to make a game that we would enjoy playing, and that was what we decided would be the most effective avenue to tackle that issue.