#completely forgot this info so i had to find out where it was from. it's from the stellaworth preorder cd jfc

[dmmdconfessions]

[Image text: To this day, I think the most random piece of information provided by side content is Noiz's (ALLEGEDLY… I refuse to accept it.) favourite food besides pizza and pasta being plum-filled pork loin. Like okay…? I guess…? The German name for it is long as hell too, I do not blame the Allmates for not understanding a thing + Usagimodoki speaking German was hilarious.]

[almadelsur]

💋 The Secrets One Keeps

summary: You're in love with jj but he's with kie, so in moments of pure desperation you often find yourself turning to the person he hates the most...rafe

warnings: some good old angsty pining, very very slight smut if you squint, fem!reader, one or two uses of y/n, plz let me know if I missed anything

a/n: SHE'S BACKKKK, so I've decided to completely reformat and re-post this fic with a few tweaks and editing considering i first wrote this like 3 years ago, and yes for those of you who have been asking, I fully intend to finallly continue this fic....more info on that later ;)

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・

JJ’s eyes change the moment Kiara steps into any room. Immediately his presence is ripped away from your immediate atmosphere, popping the little bubble you'd spent all afternoon crafting as he sprung up to greet the olive-skinned enigma that captured his affections.

“Kie!�� The joy in his tone was incomparable to anything he’d directed at anybody else. Nothing could draw out such happiness from the blonde. You hated that about her.

In an attempt at self-defense, your brain shut itself off. Shielding you from processing the scene in front of you, your emotions ran cold like cement pouring down and across your neurons. It was the only way you could survive such a beating to your heart.

You figured that by distancing yourself mentally, you wouldn’t have to raise suspicion and distance yourself physically. In reality, you knew the real reasoning was your inability to stay away from JJ but the facade helped you cope.

“Hey J” she embraced him and his body relaxed around her as if she was the only source of his happiness. The only way he’d find alleviation from what he perceived as a shitty life being through her. “Sorry I’m late my parents had me running like crazy at the wreck today.”

Scattered greetings filled the air from the rest of the pogues, yet you could only focus on the way his eyes fixated on her like she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

“Here come sit baby” he offered her the seat he had just previously been place holding. What you thought had been quality time with your best friend, presented itself to you now as momentary attention to pass the time until his actual desire arrived.

Settling herself down and offering you a wide smile, her shoulder bumped against yours gently as a sign of acknowledgment.

“Hey dude” she directed at you, but you didn’t reply. You just couldn’t bring yourself to pretend. Not today anyway. Instead, you offered her a small smile, it was minimal but it was the best you could do under the circumstances.

“Yo" A crumpled tissue paper flew at your head, jj attempting to refocus your attention on him, "didn’t you say you were gonna get some water or something?” He spoke up, the scheme evident in his tone.

“um yeah I guess” You lifted yourself up and took a few steps before jj used the opportunity to slump himself down where you had been sat and sprawled his arms across his girlfriend’s shoulders.

“snooze ya loose sucker” he joked as he turned to Kiara to start up some mindless conversation. Leaving you behind in the dust.

Your teeth gritted as you focused on making your way to the kitchen hoping the distance from the scene unfolding would lift the iron grip on your heart.

You made the fatal mistake of glancing back and you were met with the image of jj nuzzling up to kiara in a picturesque display of love. The lump building at the base of your throat indicated that it was your time to get the hell out of there before you broke down in front of everyone. 

“Shit guys, y’know what I just realized I gotta go” You spoke quickly, your tone matching your pace as you rushed to the exit of the chateau. 

“You’re still coming to the party later though right?” John B asked, not tearing his eyes away from the screen in front of him. 

“Mhm yeah sure” you opened the door ready to depart. 

“Shit I forgot about that! Me and jj are gonna be late, we got dinner at the wreck tonight.” kiara added as you stepped out, unable to control the escape of a rogue tear.

“Date night babyyyy” You heard JJ cheer before you slammed the door behind you. 

“Is Y/N okay? She seemed a bit off.” Kie nudged JJ as she questioned. 

JJ furrowed his eyebrows momentarily. Glancing out the window, he saw you jog away from the house, and a brief flash of worry flashed through his mind. As quick as it came, it dissipated. He shook his head figuring that if there had been something wrong, he’d have been the first to know. 

“Nah she’s okay don't worry.” he offered to kie.

Boy was he mistaken. 

——————————————————————

“Fuuuck me” you moaned out, sinking into him one last time. You were hot, sweaty, and heaving as you pulled him out of you.

“I thought I just did” Rafe taunted leaning back to lie down, arms crossed behind his head causing his taut abdomen to flex.

You scrambled off the bed, picking up your garments and shoving them back on your body forcefully.

“What, no pillow talk?” He tried again.

“Rafe..” you trailed off. Whenever you’d finish fucking, you’d struggle to even look at him. The self-hatred flooded your body as soon as the orgasm poured out.

“Hey you called me” he eyed you intently but you knew he didn’t actually care. To rafe cameron everything was just a game. At this point it was pretty much common knowledge. “In fact” he moved closer to you so that he could speak directly into your ear “It’s always you that calls me.”

“Don’t be a dick” you stood up and eyed your heels contemplating whether you could face the walk back in them. “You know it makes me feel like shit.” It might have sounded brutal but that’s how things were with rafe.

“Yeah, it’s like you punctuate your orgasms with self-hate.”

“I'm a pogue, rafe.” You argued back as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“So? Kooks and pogues can fuck you know.” You couldn’t comprehend why you were even having this conversation. Why now, why tonight.

“Yeah maybe, not you though.” You didn’t want to tell him the reason explicitly.

“I fuck pogues.”

“You fuck anyone.” The words came out almost instantly and without thinking, yet rafe took no offense.

“Exactly so what’s the issue?”

“The issue is, rafe.” You paused trying to find the words without actually having to say the words. “The issue is that if my friends found out they’d hate me, probably more than I already hate myself.”

He just chuckled, the look in his eyes changing as he figured you out.

“What's funny?” You challenged.

“You don’t have to bullshit me princess.” He looked up at you with a devilish glint in his eye. “You just don’t want jj knowing about your little escapades huh?” Bingo.

“He’s with Kiara.” You shrugged him off.

“Uh huh, you like him but you can’t have him.” Every word he spoke striking a nerve deep within you. “So you’re fucking me to fuck him over.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” You grabbed your heels and shoved them on, wincing as you buckled them up.

“Don’t I?” He threw his joggers on lazily as he stood, the level dynamics changing significantly. The older boy towered over you. “Where are they tonight?”

“Back at John B’s, we had a little get-together.” You crossed your arms. More often than not you usually called rafe after a few drinks left you feeling lonely. “Sorry, your invite must have gotten lost in the mail.” You attempted to jab at him with sarcasm yet he clearly held the upper hand with his line of questioning. 

“So all of them are there now?” He stepped towards you.

“Mhm,” You lied.

“Even jj?” Moving closer until your neck was craned upwards to meet his eyes.

Taking your silence as an answer, he reached up and ran his palms across your upper arms, prompting you to uncross them.

“He was uh- him and kie should be getting there soon” You mumbled.

“So would i be wrong in guessing, that might have prompted your call then?” You let yourself be guided by his movements leaning your neck further back as his hand trailed up to your jawbone.

“rafe…” you called out insignificantly.

He leaned in and pressed his lips against your neck, right over where he could feel your pulse, and pressed down.

You couldn’t help the gasp that left your mouth. Because as much as your heart belonged to jj, rafe was just so fucking good at raising your temperature.

“Round two?” He mumbled against your neck.

“Yeah..” you attempted yet it came out as a whisper. He grabbed you swiftly and lifted you, moving you across the room and throwing you down onto his bed, crawling on top of you in a predatory manner as he did so. As your back hit the bed, the ringing of your phone brought you back from the haze he had you under. 

“Wait rafe stop stop” you pushed him off and grabbed the screeching mobile, pressing it up to your ear. “Hello?”

“Dude, where are you?” The sound of jj’s voice came through over the pumping sound of music and party chatter. “Me and Kie just got back and John B says no one’s seen you for like over an hour.”

“Oh I’m uh, I had to go do something for my mom” The lie pouring out of your mouth caused rafe to chuckle which was of course met by a slap from you signaling for him to be quiet.

“Oh well, when are you getting back? I have to tell you about this date. You’re gonna be so proud of me I actually think I’m ready to tell Kie I love her” you screwed your eyes shut as he spoke.

“Yeah I- you know what I can’t make it back my mom needs me to stay and help out but uh I’ll see you tomorrow or something.” You hung up before he could even reply, throwing your phone down uncaring of its state.

“What’s wrong? They getting hitched?” Rafe spoke up from behind you.

You turned to Rafe, the fire in your veins pushing your arms to grab him, roughly pulling him back onto you.

“Just shut up and fuck me rafe.”

And fuck you he did.

——————————————————————

The next morning you woke up to the sight of rafe’s bare back. Not much of a cuddler, you figured.

Quietly you pushed the covers off and began to dress yourself back up. As you got to your shoes you sighed and shook your head, as if there was any way in hell you were going to walk home in heels. You scooped up your shoes and your now-cracked phone shaking your head, slightly ashamed at your outburst.

Without even a second glance at the sleeping body you were leaving behind, you made your way over to the door. As you turned the knob and stepped out to leave, a husky voice spoke up.

“I’ll keep my ringer on for you babe.”

You rolled your eyes looking back at him, “Fuck you rafe.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m counting on.” He didn’t even open his eyes as he answered, instead just rustling around in the bed and turning to the other side, once again facing his back to you.

You scoffed as you exited. Your internal rant clouded your vision, body on autopilot with an excellent self-navigation of the Cameron house from the countless times you’d made this exit.

“Y/N?” The gentle voice wiped your thoughts clean as the shock stilled you dead in your tracks, slowly turning to come face to face with none other than Sarah.

“Sarah” you drawled out. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s my house?” Her head was cocked to the side, equally shocked to see you.

“No I just mean- I thought you were spending the night at John B’s.” You forced the small talk, avoiding the topic of why you were here, sneaking out at 8 in the morning.

“He had to work today, did you spend the night here?” She glanced up at the door of rafe’s bedroom.

“Umm-“ There had only been two other instances where you had been at a complete loss for words. The day jj told you he and Kiara were dating, the morning after your first sexual encounter with rafe, and now this.

“Are you sleeping with my brother?!” She whisper-shouted, eyes wide as the realization hit her. Busted.

“No?”

“Oh my god!” She grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you to her room, slamming the door as soon as you were both inside. “How long has this been going on?!” Her tone was loud and her hands wild as she interrogated you.

“Just a little under a year.” You sat on her bed and looked at your lap as you spoke. Reminiscent of a child being scolded.

“A year?! Oh my god!” She repeated. “Who knows about this?!”

With that, you looked up at her desperately. “No one. No one knows so please don’t tell them.” You didn’t have to name names for her to know who you were referring to.

“Are you two like” she paused “together?” She scrunched her nose up, disgusted at the thought of her bully of an older brother dating anyone.

“No god no. It’s just sex” you were just as uncomfortable as Sarah was, having to tell her about boning her older brother.

“Disgusting.” She turned away from you with her arms crossed, looking out the window.

“Look I’m not proud of it okay? Just-“ You sighed “Just please don’t tell anyone” pleading again.

Sarah let out a long sigh and uncrossed her arms. She walked over to you and joined you on the bed, her eyes showing concern mixed with something you couldn’t quite place your finger on.

“I thought you were into jj” she spoke softly, there it was. Pity.

“Yeah well, jj is with kie and instead of sitting around wallowing in self-pity, I decided to do something about it.” As the words left your mouth, you realized how weak the explanation was.

“So you just use rafe to bang the jj out of you.”

“It’s not like Rafe cares, if anything he’s also using me.” You tried to reason.

“I don’t doubt that. But I mean, that’s- It’s not healthy, you’ll never move on if you don’t actually process your emotio-“

“Look Sarah, I don’t need to do any of that shit okay? What I have here works, when I fu- when I’m with rafe, I don’t think about jj.” Tears began to swell in your eyes “Sleeping with rafe helps me forget about everything, even if it’s only for a little while he uh- he makes me feel good.” To an extent, there was truth behind your words, while you and rafe fucked the rest of the world went away. It was only after, that the crippling self-hatred hit you along with the return of your immense feelings for jj. 

Sarah shuffled over and threw her arm around you. “That’s not good for you, it’s just momentary. It’s easy and it's a cycle, you’re never going to get better going down this path. Especially not with rafe.”

“Rafe he’s- he’s not that bad.”

“Yes he is. But i bet it gives you satisfaction fucking him knowing jj hates him. Feels like revenge right?” She’d always been so perceptive your Sarah, you hated how she could see right through you.

Tears ran down your cheek silently. “You’re not gonna tell anyone right?” You sniffled.

She gave you one of those classic salt-of-the-earth Sarah Cameron smiles, the kinda smile that would light up any room she walked into. “Takin' it to the grave babe.”

A loud beeping caused both your heads to whip towards the window. “Shit, I completely forgot I was supposed to go on the HMS with pope and jj, we were gonna chill there until John B and Kie finished work.” She rose to her feet and extended an arm towards you. “Wanna come? Or we could drop you home if you’re not up for it.”

With a sigh you took her hand and pulled yourself up, walking beside her as you mentally prepped yourself to face the blonde you desperately pined for.

“Well rise and shine campers.” jj yelled out of the window of the drivers seat.

“Y/N! Where you been dude? you totally bailed last night.” Pope was next to speak as you and Sarah filed into the Twinkie. As JJ began to drive you avoided any form of eye contact in his general direction.

“I had to go help my mom out, blackout at mine again.” You didn’t even look at pope either, instead focusing your attention on the blur of trees and houses pacing by the window as JJ sped down the winding roads.

“Isn’t that what you were wearing last night?” pope, observant as always, pointed out.

“Uh yeah, I didn’t really get any time to change cause…”

“I called her last night when I got home, I was so drunk I don’t think I was ready to stop the party.” Sarah covered for you.

“Yeah I wrapped up helping my mom out and then this one calls me talkin bout a sleepover or something so I didn’t exactly have much time to change.” 

Thankfully pope had lost interest as soon as he had asked the question, otherwise, your overcompensating ass would have been caught out straight away. You always had to add to the lie until you felt like you had sold it completely.

Keeping your eyes trained on the outside meant that jj’s frown directed at you through the windscreen mirror went completely undetected. He always knew whenever there was something up with you and right there and then he knew something definitely was.

“Hey, you okay?” He didn’t need to address you explicitly for you to know he was talking to you.

“Yeah just tired.” You shrugged him off in an attempt to distance yourself from him yet again.

He knew you were lying but he didn’t understand why, you never lied to each other. Apart from John B, the pair of you were closer to each other than with anybody else in the group. You’d been best friends since kindergarten, and since then you’d sworn 3 things to each other.

1- You’d always share your snacks.

2-You’d always be best friends even if you argued.

 3- You would never ever lie or keep secrets from each other.

Of course, as the both of you grew older the rules became more and more lax. The snack sharing was limited only to when you felt nice enough and sometimes you’d go for days without making up if you had argued particularly badly. Having kept two friendship-breaking secrets from him, the childhood rules seemed pretty insignificant by now.

“Mhm,” he responded, flickering his eyes between you and the road. “Are we taking you home to change first?”

“Yeah, I don’t know if I’ll join you guys afterward though.” You chewed down on your nail anxiously as the tension from being in the same space as jj paired with the guilt from having fucked rafe prior, suffocated you.

JJ made a face as he focused on the road, something was wrong with you and he’d be dammed if he wasn’t going to put his everything into finding out what that was.

[too-much-tma-stuff]

I Want Better For You (part 3.5)

part 1 | Masterpost | Part 3

Tim sat on the edge of his bed in Titan’s Tower, his mind going like a hamster on a wheel, a mile a minute and getting nowhere. In his hands he held the note left for him by Red Hood! It was a serious security breach that he had gotten in here at all. Obviously Tim knew he was smart, he had been Robin before Tim after all, you couldn’t do that job without being smart as hell and strong as heck. But he had upgraded the security himself when he joined the team, no one should have been able to get into the tower, let alone into his room to leave the note.

At least it wasn’t a bad note? In fact it was… nice, it was a kind offer. They had to know that if he did this he would spy, he wouldn’t even be able to help it because he’d always had a detective's mind, yet still they offered. 

Of course there was always a possibility that it was a trap of some type but Tim really didn’t think it was. Jason had proved he could get into the Tower, if he wanted Tim dead or kidnapped he could have just done it.

He should talk to his team about this, he should talk to Bruce about this, but for the moment he just held the note. Robin had always been his hero, sure it was Dick he’d first recognized because of the Flying Grayson connection, but Jason had been His Robin. Tim had idolized Jason, and been completely devastated when he died. Ya he had become Robin to help Bruce, but it was to memorialize Jason as well.

He knew that Jason wasn’t the same as he’d been before his death, but… while he was dead Tim had gotten used to thinking of him like a brother. A part of him desperately wanted to take this note at face value, to forget all about the violence, and the crimes, and just take the olive branch and bond with his childhood hero. But he was going to be smart about this.

He was going to go, of course he was, but he needed to put safety measures in place and some sort of plan. Though he probably still wasn’t going to tell B about it, he was overprotective and would grill Tim for any bit of information he managed to gleen, and if he wanted any real info he would have to do a long con. Best he could do right now would be to have Superboy listen in, set up a code word, and have Impulse ready for an extraction if needed then… well he’d tell Batman when he needed to.

------------

It took about a week to talk Superboy into letting him go but it wasn’t exactly hard to set up as minimal of plans as he had, including wearing a hidden wire to record whatever happened. As long as it worked, Tim had heard tech had a habit of messing up around Hyena if he didn’t want them working. 

He didn’t bother thinking of an excuse, he didn’t think he needed one. Wanting to get to know them would be enough, especially if he was going to rely on them for anything in the future. 

So, feeling tense and keeping to the shadows he entered Crime Alley on a slow night with his friends behind him, figuratively speaking. He moved a bit deeper in, grappling up to the roof of a building, feeling a little lost and listless. He did know vaguely where to find these two, but Crime Alley wasn’t a small place, and now that he was in their territory he didn’t know where to go, it’s not like they knew where Hood and Hyena lived, or their base of operations. 

It seemed like he didn’t need to though, because while he was standing on the roof thinking he saw someone coming, leaping from one building to the other with reckless abandon. They weren’t even using a grapple as they free ran and made jumps Tim was pretty sure should have been impossible. Tim knew who it was before they were close enough to see detail because Hood still used a grapple, the only one who acted like that was Hyena.

Sure enough Hood’s lover skidded to a halt across the roof in front of Tim, grinning to the point he could see it a little past the muzzle he wore. He didn’t have any weapons out, not that that meant anything, half the time Hyena forgot to use the clawed brass knuckles he carried and fought with bare hands. Tim was tense, ready to fight or flee but Hyena was not, he seemed relaxed and didn’t approach, keeping his hands visible. 

“Hey there little birdy, what can I do for ya?” Hyena asked, he didn’t have a Gotham accent but it was a little hard to tell where exactly it was from.

“I got Red Hood’s note. I just wanted to talk, introduce myself properly and meet you before I decide to take you up on any of the offers.” Tim said honestly.

“Of course!” Hyena agreed, pulling his phone out of a hidden pocket on the inside of his cropped jacket. “I’ll text Hood, ask him to pick up some food for us and we can have a little rooftop picnic and chat for a bit. How’s that sound?”

“Sounds good,” Tim said, not sure why he was surprised by the offer.

“Any requests? The lifestyle sure builds up an appetite huh? And I certainly hope you’re still growing,” Hyena teased, cackling at Tim’s expression of indignation. Hyena wasn’t that much taller than him!

“Coffee,” He requested, finally relaxing a little.

“Hmm,” Hyena sounded judgmental as he tapped at his phone. “Fine, it’s your bone density that’s at stake not mine.” He pressed send, waited a moment and his phone dinged with a reply. “Great, he’ll be on his way soon, with picking up food he’ll probably be about a half hour,” Hyena said, pocketing his phone again and flopping down, as if the rooftop was a soft bed. “I know it’s probably Hood you really came to see but is there anything I can tell you in the meantime? Let’s stick to small talk though huh? I know how you bats and birds are, but I also know you’re wearing a wire, and I’m not interested in spilling my guts.” 

“Alright, ya that’s fair. Hood mentioned in the note that you know a lot about astronomy?” Tim mentioned, finally sitting down with his legs crossed as well.

“Oh ya, I was totally obsessed with it for most of my life, I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid and learned everything I could about space and engineering,” Hyena confirmed casually.

“This is a long way from being an astronaut,” Tim pointed out.

“Ya, well, things don’t always go the way you plan you know? Sometimes you get kidnapped by mad scientists and experimented on to the point you go a little around the bend,” Hyena snickered. Tim wasn’t sure if he was being serious, or self referential, or not.

“Riiight, well, what are your favourite space facts then?” Tim asked, just to pass the time really. Hyena brightened immediately and was happy to start sharing a bunch of random facts. 

It ended up in a back and forth of fun facts, aerospace vs chemistry and both of them could go shot for shot when it came to engineering. Tim realized, a bit belatedly, that Hyena is way smarter than Tim had given him credit for. That was disconcerting but… if they ended up getting alone Tim thought he could have a lot of fun tinkering with him.

“Incoming,” Hood broke into their conversation, warning them before he landed on the roof so he wouldn’t startle them. “Hey there Timmy,” He said as he walked over to crouch next to Danny, handing him a few bags of batburger and a tray of drinks before taking off his helmet. He was wearing a domino underneath it but it wasn’t like Tim didn’t already know his identity. “Got your coffee, I bet if you took off that domino your eye bags would be nearly as dark as the mask. Never enough time to sleep between school, social life, and nightlife.” Jason said, taking the tray of drinks back from Hyena, who promptly started digging through the bag with his now free hands, and handed the coffee cup to Tim.

“If you drop out of school to play hero I will personally kick your ass,” Jason said pointing at Tim warningly. 

“Uhhh,” Tim sounded, shifting a little awkwardly because he couldn’t deny he had already thought about dropping out. He looked down and took a sip of the coffee, which wasn’t great, but hey. “Why do you care?”

“Neither Hyena or I got to finish school because we died before graduation,” Hood said simply, which was a punch in the gut, and new information about Hyena. “I want better for you.” 

Tim didn’t know how to respond to that.

Hyena finished rummaging through the bag with a little yip of delight and started distributing the food, handing Hood a bag and taking a box of chicken wings, a burger, and some fries for himself before handing off the rest to Tim. “Looks like Hood didn’t know what you wanted and bought half the store, whatever you don’t eat I’ll finish,” Hyena joked as Tim took the bag. “Shit I forgot my sauces,” Hyena grumbled, staring at his nuggets with a little pinch between his brows. 

“What sauce are you looking for?” Tim asked, looking through the bag.

“Sweet and sour,” Hyena said brightly and Tim found the sauce and tossed it to Hyena, who hummed happily and took off his mask to eat. He was completely barefaced now and Tim couldn’t help but stare a little just because of how casual he was being about this. “What?” Hyena asked, catching Tim staring. 

“Hey I know he’s cute but he’s taken,” Hood joked, slinging an arm around Hyena’s shoulders who cackled and leaned back against Jason.

“No!” Tim said, cursing his fair skin for showing his blush, not because Hood was right of course, he was just embarrassed! “I mean, that’s not what I was thinking, I’m just surprised you took off your mask,” He told Hyena.

“It’s not like you haven’t seen it before I’m sure. I’m sure you and the bats have already figured out my ‘civilian identity’ or whatever. It’s not like I have anything to protect really, I only have the mask and the outfit because I like the aesthetic.” Hyena said, gesturing down at himself. 

“Fair enough I guess…” Tim said before looking back at Hood. “How did you get into Titan’s Tower?”

“Trade secrets Timmy, I’d rather talk about you. How’s school? You got a girlfriend or boyfriend?” Jason asked with a shit eating grin as Tim sputtered indignantly and then took a big bite of his burger to avoid having to answer such an invasive question! Especially with Superboy definitely listening in.

[pandalorian36]

Spencer reid x (gn)reader

A late night working ends with the both of you falling asleep on the couch where the rest of the team find you the following morning.

Word count: 885 Warnings: none

I stifle another yawn stretching out in the chair "Do we have any more coffee?" Spencer jerks upright a sheet of paper stuck to his cheek "What?" I chuckle leaning over and removing it "Maybe we should take a break?" he nods and stands stretching pushing hair out of his face "How is it one already?" I shrug and spin around in my chair before standing "Everyone else went home at ten? I thought it had only been an hour."

He grins "Although time does appear to pass faster when you are working." I hold up a hand "Hold up brains. It is far too late...early for that. As much as I love you and your info dumps now is not the time." he chuckles "Sorry."

We make our way to the small kitchen finding clean cups and coffee. A weight drapes over my shoulders as arms snake around my waist "What happened to being professional in the workplace?" he mumbles something into my neck that sounds like "Alone."

I turn around wrapping my arms around him sighing happily "We could go home." he sighs "I want to get this done." I nod "I know so do I." he smiles pressing a gentle kiss to my forehead then my lips, I melt into his touch cupping his cheek gently "We should get back to work." he sighs kissing my cheek "Okay." grabbing the two cups of coffee in one hand and my hand in the other we make our way back to the office sitting on the sofa and dragging some of the files closer.

We spend another hour working getting almost everything complete when I decide I want to be more comfortable so bring my feet up onto the sofa leaning my head on Spencer’s shoulder. I manage another page before I can no longer fight the heaviness of my eyes. I am vaguely aware of the files falling to the ground Spencer’s head leaning against mine.

3rd person narrator

Penelope, Emily, and Derek are the first to arrive the next morning. Penelope looks over at the conference room confused "Did you guys leave the light on?"

"Y/N and Reid where going to stay late. They probably just forgot." Hotch and Rossi walk over sighing "Conference room. We've got work to do." They all make their way over Derek and Emily freezing in the doorway grinning broadly. "Oh my god."

Y/N has their head in Spencer’s lap while Spencer has an arm draped over their waist head sliding down the sofa slightly the both of them fast asleep a pile of files on the floor where they have slipped out of their hands. Garcia is quick to snap a photo while laughing "That is adorable."

Hotch clears his throat loudly startling the two sleeping agents "Good morning." Y/N scrambles to their feet "We fell asleep." Rossi chuckles "We can see that."

Reid stands up brushing fingers through his hair while Morgan laughs ruffling it up more "Bit of a bird’s nest there pretty boy." Reid swats his hand away the others taking seats around the table. Hotch has the barest smile visible on his face "So you where productive last night?"

You grin grabbing the files of the floor "Actually yes. Where's it gone?" Spencer sorts through the remaining files on the table finding the one you are looking for "Here."

"Thank you." Garcia starts giggling though quickly stops at the questioning looks from her superiors "Sorry sir." Spencer and you talk through your work while Garcia continues to grin at her computer. Rossi smiles "I suppose we shouldn't be shocked the two of you completed three days of work in a single evening."

Once we have finished going over the files Hotch takes over summarising and organising, but it doesn't take too long. Morgan grins at something Garcia shows him "You two sure looked cozy on the sofa." Spencer blushes scratching the back of his head "I think I need some coffee."

"Pump your breaks pretty boy. I think you and Y/N have something to share with the group." I feel my eyes widen as I recall going to get coffee, we forgot about the cameras. Emily and JJ grin moving around the table to view Penelope’s laptop while Spencer buries his face in his hands in attempt to hide the blush while you remain frozen in place "I knew it." Emily groans "Damn." Morgan holds out his hand "Cough up."

Rossi and Hotch both look equally confused while Spencer is now resembling a tomato. I sigh "Well the cats already out the bag. Yes, we are dating. He asked me first. It’s been nine months."

"Nine months!" Garcia whoops "I win." Hotch shakes his head slightly at the group’s antics "Just keep things professional in the workplace." If possible, Spencer turns a deeper shade of red sputtering slightly while Morgan grins broadly "I think this the first time we've seen you at a loss for words."

I stand making my way to Spencer’s side he takes my hand in his squeezing it gently. While Emily sighs "It is so obvious how did we miss it." The others start pestering us with questions, but I am glad they know. We are a family, a strange family definitely but a family none the less.

[moon-thething]

Heyy, how about a platonic garent+ child! Reader headcanons? Reader sees her as a mother figure and lieks clinging to her, have a nice day yo

Hello anon :) I'm a bit confused by your request, I don't know if you ment to type in garnet or not

But since I don't want to leave you hanging I'll write headcanons for garnet, and if you ment someone else, you can send in another request:)

So sorry for the inconvenience

But, to give some background info

Reader is 5 - 7 years old and doesn't have a mom 👍

Romantic or platonic?: Platonic/romantic

Readers gender: gender neutral

Type: Fluff

Hope you enjoy this :)

–––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––

You two met at the beach, no questions asked

You were just burying your dad in the sand, giggling happily as your dad slowly regretted his life choices

While the gems were not so far away. Amethyst was joking around with Steven while Pearl was desperately trying to find napkins in her bag, and Garnet was just chilling

When Pearl had finally found the napkins she quickly pulled them out if her bag and held them up proudly, but a strong ghust of wind blew the napkins away. Garnet just stood up and went to collect the napkins without another word

While your younger self was looking at your sand masterpiece, you suddenly had the bright idea to run around the beach to find seashells, and so you did

While you ran not that far away from where your dad was, not having enough braincells to look for seashells near the sea, a flying napkin decided to hit your face

You fell down on your butt and pulled the napkin off of your face. And you were shocked to see a woman standing in front of you

She just waved with an awkward smile as you stared at her in awe. You then giggled and stood up as you grabbed her hand and jumped up and down

Garnet looked at you with a confused expression but started to laugh along with you

Then the two of you decided to have a little chat and you explained that you needed seashells to fancy up your dad, or your dad's head

Garnet was more than happy to help you find seashells and so she took you near the sea. Every time a wave would arrive she would lift you up in the air as if you were flying and you would giggle

By the time you collected a good amount of seashells you completely forgot why you collected them in the first place. That is untill you heard your dad's cry's of help

You turned around to see a pelican standing hear him as he just screamed in fear. You giggled and ran towards him, waving goodbye to Garnet as she waved back

And from that point on, every time you'd see Garnet, either it be at the center or at the beach you would run to her nd hug her leg and Garnet was more than happy to hug you back

While the gems, Steven and your dad were all looking at you two with confused expressions although your dad was more panicked, they eventually got used to it

It wasn't any more than a slight interaction, that is untill your dad recognized Steven from somewhere and realized that he was friends with his dad (for the sake of the plot)

And when your dad did realize, you were with Garnet practically every second of the day. And you've gotta say, you do share some amazing memories with her

(I'm only giving one example)

Y/n sat on the couch, rocking back and forth as they impatiently waited for Garnet to return

Footsteps could be heard approaching the living room as Y/n looked towards the door, eventually seeing Garnet walk in with her hands behind her back

Y/n jumped up and down as they stared at Garnet. Garnet smiled warmly as she removed her hands from her back to see her holding three colouring books and a pack of crayon's

Y/n squealed in excitement as they towards her and hugged her leg

"Thank you so much mom!" They yelled, Garnet's heart practically melted t hearing the word 'mom' as she resisted the urge to cry then and there. She suqeazed everything into one hand as she picked you up with her now free one

"No problem." She smiled, kissing their forehead as Y/n let out fits of giggles. They then slowly started to walk towards the kitchen, colouring for the rest of the evening

Good memories indeed. Garnet totally doesn't replay them in her mind half of the time, no she doesn't yes she does

Garnet probably cried when she saw you slowly growing up, not being used to such 'fast growth' since Steven stayed the same

[loonylooly]

at this point i'm wondering what sarah is thinking when writing her love interests, like ok it's clear she finds them hot but like....are they good people

Rhys:

UTM lap dance shenanigans

throwing Feyre into danger constantly (Weaver, destroying cauldron, getting the book from Adriata, etc etc)

Still not doing jack shit about wing clippings in Illyria?? Emerie is right there, Rhysand, go enforce your damn laws

Insulting his wife's sister constantly

Almost killed his wife's sister cause she dared give her important medical information

Locked Lucien (MY BOY!!) in the house of wind

Locked Nesta in the house of wind

Didn't give Mor any warning that time he made her face her abusers and she cried i think (ngl i forgot most of it)

Ignoring Hewn City even tho...Kier is like the only bad guy we've seen from there?? Surely there's decent people in Hewn City, don't gotta make everyone suffer

Nesta windhaven kidnapping intervention so she stops spending Rhys' money (if it was really about her own sake, they would've put a stop to it much earlier)

Seemingly alienates everyone in Feyre's life that could and would stand up to Rhys for Feyre's sake. Lucien? Nah, shoo. Nesta? Nah, shoo. Weird thought but Tarquin? Yeah, makes her steal his book.

And last but DEFINITELY not least; demon baby wife death

HE COULD'VE TOLD FEYRE... OR ATLEAST NOT THREATENED TO KILL HER SISTER FOR TELLING HER WHEN HE HOULD'VE TOLD HER IN THE FIRST PLACE??

THERE'S PROBABLY MORE BUT MOVING ON

Cassian:

Barely ever stands up for Nesta in the IC

Aids in kidnapping Nesta to Windhaven so she stops spending whysand's money

Laughs at Nesta when she falls down the stairs

Aids in punishing Nesta for daring to tell Feyre important medical info

Constantly going agaisnt Nesta's wishes and trying to "save her" when she doesn't want him to

That one time Azriel asked Nesta if Cass had pushed her down the stairs...Like are we gonna ignore that?? Personally I'd have a quarter life crisis if my closest friend, who is like my sibling and has known me most of our lives, seriously entertained the idea that i would physically assault the girl I like

general aggressiveness all of ACOSF

aids in bulldozing Nesta's apartment

Rowan goddamn Whitehorn (Who I've yet to see people bashing him somehow,,, HoF rowan was like if ACOSF cassian had a horrific murder baby

Left his pregnant mate alone during a war cause he wanted to prove himself....like..idk man if i had the choice between war and taking care of my pregnant wife i'd pick the wife (did he know she was pregnant? i've kind of forgotten by now)

Rowan's kid would've been hundreds of years older than Aelin.....just think abt that

Literally everything he did to Aelin during training in HoF

Their argument where he PUNCHED HER IN THE FACE

Threatened to whip Aelin...I repeat....Threatened to whip Aelin, an ex-slave....

Told Aelin it'd be better if she died 10 years ago (unprovoked?? bitch you met her like 2 weeks ago just cause she's getting on your nerves doesn't mean you gotta wish DEATH upon her)

Literally was relieved to find out she was only 19 because if she was a few years older she could've been THE CHILD OF HIS BEST FRIEND.

No issue with marrying the cousin of his best friend's child....Imagine if he hadn't met Aelin first.. If he'd met Aedion first, Aelin would've always been the relative of his friend's son to him

FOR THE RECORD i hate all of the SJM age gaps but rowan and aelin's specifically irks me because Aelin LITERALLY CALLS HIM OLD throughout the WHOLE SERIES

Literally tells Aelin he doesn't care about what she's been through and that she is nothing to him after she confronts him for leaving her

Puts Luca in danger by sticking him on to a frozen lake with a monster inside where he'll DIE if Aelin can't save him

Funnily enough, some of the only seemingly decent person guys in SJM 1. Are completely forgotten about in the books or 2. SJM had to make them violently unlikeable

Like we've got:

Tarquin, seemed like a pretty good guy, rightfully pissed that the IC stole his family heirloom, shows up like twice in the books (LET HIM COME BACK SARAH I LOVE HIM)

Tamlin, was pretty decent in book 1, was made violently unlikeable in book 2 onwards

Chaol, very strong morals, generally a good person, loves his wife, made violently unlikeable and boring in late CoM, HoF, and QoS (ToD is one of my favorite books in the series, will praise ToD till the day I die, my boy EARNED his own book)

Aedion, seemed like a good person, strong morals, spent years trading his dignity for the sake of Terrasen, loved his cousin above all else, made violently unlikable in KoA (even tho I think he was justified in being angry about it, i'd be SO pissed)

Sartaq, good guy, strong morals, Nesryn's chapters were some of my favorites in ToD, Sartaq is one of my favorite SJM love interests, i'll never forgive author lady for forgetting about him in KoA (tho i guess she forgot about everyone from ToD? Yrene and Chaol are the only important ones, she barely even mentions Nesryn even though Nesryn's BEEN an integral part of the gang since QoS, giving her the Suki from ATLA treatment)

[curio-queries]

SMERALDO GARDEN MARCHING BAND

My thoughts prior to the release of MUSE. I've avoided pretty much all reactions and analysis posts until I finished this so I have no clue if anyone else has come up with better words to describe some of these concepts but here's my take on it. I wanted to get this out prior to MUSE so that I can see how my view evolves with further context but here's where I am now.

Initial Reaction:

I'd actually had a few issues that night so I wasn't in the best headspace to take in a new song but I did listen to it on Spotify first and then watched the mv twice, once without subs and once with. (And yes, I know it's technically not called an mv...deal with it lol)

Anyways, I definitely wasn't immediately sold on it - which is expected from me, it's EXCEEDINGLY rare that I like any song on first listen but SGMB only took a couple of runthroughs before I was on board. One thing that helped me reframe it in my mind and with my previous expectations is to remember the first part of Jimin's self-proclaimed attributes: Cutie, sexy, lovely. SGMB leans very solidly into the cutie aspect, a little near the lovely side but far deeper into Cutie than anything we've seen in his solo releases. (RememberCute was an answer in the seossword puzzle). That got me thinking about where the rest of his songs would be in comparison and here's the placement I've landed on. Some of these have changed over the past few days but I'm curious where y'all disagree with my placements.

Good old Serendipity, a perfect balance of the three in my opinion. All of FACE is firmly in the Sexy section with Like Crazy leaning more evenly into Lovely. Lie is also right there with LC but more closely on the border. My beloved Promise and Letter holding down the Lovely section with CTT straying closer to Cutie. If you forgot about the cutie circle though, SGMB would have seems like it was complete out of the expected range. I am curious if we'll ever get something that's a mix of cutie and sexy, I can't comprehend what that would be like but I wouldn't put it past our JM to find a way!

Theories?

So, how do I think I did with all of my theories? Let's go through them one by one:

Open Locker Meaning: nothing to prove/disprove this yet. There were an awful lot of references to Serendipity in the mv though, so maybe that's the tie-in? I don't know, this one was a streeeeeetch in any case.

Sound Effects Interlude: we know we're getting an interlude but we'll have to wait for MUSE and any behind info to learn if it's sound effects that Jimin recorded himself like Dive.

Rooms Going from Dark to Light: Yes! I mean we knew it was going to be a lighter album than FACE but I think the word BRIGHT is all over SGMB. And I think this technique in both of those videos was trying to highlight that for us.

SGMB as an Actual Band: Yes! Definitely right here too! I'm going to talk about this more below because I think this is actually a very important part of this song.

The Emoji Poll from the Insta Chat: Yes! I think some people are still trying to make the argument that each option is supposed to represent different songs on muse. And while the others may lean more into any of these specifically, SGMB definitely has elements of all of them as well

An Actual Band?

So, like I mentioned in the theory above, I had the thought that SGMB could be portrayed as a fictional band itself, very similar to what MCR did with the Black Parade. And since Jimin decided to use this as the song's title; as well as make it the pre-release track, I think this is an important topic to delve into.

First, this allows Jimin a perspective shift to share with us his career outside the lens of BTS. Not because he NEEDS or WANTS to separate himself from them but he has had his own journey as an artist that may differ from his experiences from the perspective of a BTS member. Obviously BTS is completely woven through this journey and he gives us an acknowledgement of that with the line about 12 June and the handsign.

(Sidenote, whenever I see any of them do that now, I instantly think of that moment in Jimin's pixid ep where he said they don't anymore...I think we may have been misled...) 😝

Second, the frame of SGMB from a band's perspective also puts the song firmly in the categorization of 'work' rather than 'personal'. With FACE being such a deeply personal projectregarding his very deep human experiences, i love that he'svery upfront with us about MUSE being a work project. I've said this before, and it's one of my absolute favorite things about Jimin's music: he crafts it so that we can easily adapt it to our own interpretations. There's a lot of loving and beautiful imagery in the lines of this song that can have special meaning in all levels of relationships; platonic or not. But his delivery if this message to us, is professional. This is reinforced by the suits Jimin has worn in all of the material released so far. He's following a work dress code. (If you happen to see this post within a week of release, we have a poll regarding Jimin's suits on @bts-polls )

ME + US = MUSE

I just want to touch on this briefly here as I expect there'll be more once the album releases but there are some hints already. Like I discussed in my FACE post, Jimin has again come up with some key words to weave through the project. In FACE, it was several sentences but MUSE seems to be focusing on the following:

ME: Jimin himself

US: Jimin's view on his audience

MUSE: His awareness of us and how that effects his creations and manner of artistry.

SGMB and CTT are both bursting with these references and viewpoints. But I honestly don't think of SGMB as a traditional 'fan song'. I have another post where I talk about the different kinds of fan songs. Like I said above, SGMB details Jimin's experience as an artist and how his audience plays into that process. Not like CTT that's literally a diary of our journey with him. Maybe an extremely nuanced take but SGMB just doesn't feel like it belongs in the same 'fan song' categorization that CTT does.

The End for Now

Does anyone know anything about that little hand-wave Jimin does during the bow at the end? He repeats it. Is just an additional flourish that he's added in himself? I've never seen anyone do that during bows after a performance so I'm wondering if it's a cultural/industry thing.

What do y'all think? I'd love to hear your thoughts! If any of you have made posts about SGMB, I'll try to read them now but rumblr is not very forgiving if you miss something in the timeline. I'm very happy for you to share links to your posts in the comments!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for being mad that my girlfriend broke up with me?

So I (23 M) got with my ex (23 F) about 5 months ago— we met through a college program, and really hit it off! It was just friends at first but I pretty quickly caught feelings, because she was just so down to Earth with me I really felt like I could spend forever with her. I wasn’t gonna say anything yet, because I felt like we hadn’t really known each other for that long. But then, some stuff happened in my city (don’t worry we’re fine), and thanks to that we didnt meet up for a good while. I ended up finding out she went to the next city over to escape a bunch of riots (I don’t blame her) so I drove out to make sure she was okay. Which she was!

I took her back home after telling her about what she missed— she was originally going to go to her parents house, but with some convincing on my end she agreed to go back. After such a long couple of days, I realized she always made me feel safe and comforted in ways no one else could. So I confessed to her, which she accepted, and we started dating! It was really nice, and super romantic. I felt like I found the perfect person and I thought she did the same.

But less than a month or so into the relationship, she completely turned on me! Getting mad about how I moved on from the previously mentioned from the crazy stuff happening in my city, yelling about her living in my house now, and not wanting to date anymore. It was like she completely forgot our friendship and relationship all. And I tried helping her get back to where she was, and sometimes she’d wake up like her anger had never happened, but after a few days it wouldn’t stick and I’ve given up on trying to make her remember anything. At first she was sort of OK with dating but it quickly turned into a on-again, off-again thingy.

She constantly complains about things— she complains mostly about my hobbies (I’m really into gardening and botany, which she says is “weird”, and I don’t know what she means by that…?), and she also complains about our neighbor, who I’m on really good terms with (apparently my ex and my neighbor (41 F) had bad blood in the past, but I had no clue!!!) In fact, she complains about my other friends (23 F and 22 NB), saying that the former is a “self-absorbed prick” and the latter got “brainwashed” by me after we became friendly. I feel like I can’t spend time with my ex around my other friends anymore or even mention them because of how vocal her anger is.

She claims to have constant nightmares and blames them on our negative relationship, and I was getting really fed up with it because she just lashes out in anger instead of talking ANYTHING out with me. We got into an argument recently, and because I was so angry I had told her that I didn’t like her now and I wished she went back to how she was when we first started dating. She was really hurt, and I didn’t mean to hurt her that way, but she ran off before I could apologize. It’s been days and she still hasn’t come home, but she texted me and told me we’re through (if it wasn’t clear enough). I’m pretty frustrated she has just been lashing out at everything and not communicating with me. It makes me feel shitty and I don’t get why she acts like this.

I’m afraid I’m being a dick for being mad she left without ever talking things out, but I wish she gave us a proper chance! So AITA??

What are these acronyms?

[alwayswritewithcoffee]

How do you think it would have changed or affected the course of Castle and Beckett's relationship if Beckett at the end of the pilot, thinking it would be a one-time thing and they would never see each other again, had agreed to go on a date with Castle, they had slept together and then Castle would have started following her?

Wow, so I suck. This has been in my inbox for a long time and I either never got the notification, or I looked at it and thought I'd answer later and forgot. But it's (over a year) later!!! So here we go. The short answer is: it'd be messy as hell. I think she spends all of season one incensed that a guy she slept with as a one-time thing is following her around like a puppy, while Castle keeps trying (and failing) to convince her to engage in a repeat performance. Sorenson's appearance — and Beckett being completely enamored with him — is enough for Castle to get the message, and I think he chills out. But I also think they don't have a close enough relationship for him to poke at her mother's murder as early as he does in the show. In my mind, he finds out the details when they get the Dick Coonan case. He's been shadowing her for long enough that there's a begrudging (on Beckett's part) partnership and a burgeoning friendship. Castle's like 30% in love with her already and doesn't hesitate to pay the fee for info on the killer, and he's there to prop her up and help her through it when it all goes to hell. So by the time the serial killer case arrives and Kate's apartment blows up, there's a legit friendship. Enough so that when she moves in with him, Castle gets that repeat performance and it stirs up his hope that there could be something more. There isn't, of course. Demming appears and she latches onto him as a distraction from the awkwardness and regrets of letting her guard down with Castle. He goes to the Hamptons for the same reason and in the fall, he doesn't come back. He has no intention of coming back, and he's in and out of the precinct throughout his relationship with Gina. He does shadow Beckett sometimes, but mostly does book promo stuff and keeps his head down. I don't think they grow closer as they do in season three. He's hurt, and she keeps him at arm's length, but they do have moments where the possibility of more is right there — in LA when Royce dies, after Jerry Tyson assaults Castle and Ryan — and when Beckett is shot, Castle thinks 'God, I could love you' but he doesn't say it. He dives in front of the bullet, and he begs her not to die, but there's no deathbed confession. When she shoves him away to recover he works the case with the boys but accepts that, once again, she's telling him she doesn't want or need him like he wants/needs her. Coming back to the precinct, it's her olive branch that breaks the stalemate. Like Castle, there are feelings there, but not the depth that they are in the show. But she convinces him to come back and work full time, and that year is the one where they REALLY become friends and partners. Kate pieces her life back together, occasionally shares some of it with him after her therapy sessions, and when he asks her not to throw her life away -- she listens. She doesn't nearly fall off a roof, she goes to Alexis' graduation and holds Castle's hand while he cries at his daughter's speech. They have their movie marathon night and he invites her to the Hamptons for a week in July, which Kate accepts. But there's still the deal that Castle cut with Smith after her shooting. Beckett is still digging into her mother's murder when she has time, but she's also spending time outside work in and out of Castle's loft, getting to know Martha and Alexis. They dance around the possibility of dating for a few months, but when Tyson tries to kill Castle they throw caution to the wind and just go for it. So when they stumble upon the info that helps them ID William Bracken (remember, no rooftop fight. No file recovery in this universe), Castle is forced to tell Beckett about the deal he cut for her safety. She's apocalyptic with rage, breaks up with him, and throws him out of her apartment and the precinct. She still confronts Bracken, but this time it is because she's been offered a job in D.C. and wants to do it without his shadow hanging over her.

A couple of years go by. Alexis takes a job at a nonprofit in D.C., and Castle bumps into Beckett at a random coffee shop. He's stopped writing Nikki Heat books, she's rising through the ranks in the AG office, and they talk. It's awkward. There's hurt and feelings on both sides, but they don't reconcile. He goes back to NYC. She goes back to work. A few years later, William Bracken's presidential run ends when he's arrested by one of the most promising members of the Secret Service. Beckett isn't on Bracken's detail, but her security clearance and tenacity, as well as a ton of connections in law enforcement, have helped her build the case. She arrests him for her mother's murder and fends off offers from dozens of companies and agencies to take a job at the training academy. A few weeks after the arrest, she gets a note in the mail. It's Castle, congratulating her on solving her mother's murder and saying he will be in D.C. for a book signing for his latest novel -- a political thriller. He invites her to dinner but understands if she doesn't want to see him. She agonizes over what to do in the week that follows but, ultimately, Kate finds that the sting of betrayal has evaporated. When she thinks of Castle, it's mostly the months when he made her so happy. So she puts on her favorite dress, curls her hair, and meets him in front of the restaurant at 7:30 sharp. And they talk for hours over delicious food, a bottle of wine, and cups of coffee. When the restaurant apologetically kicks them out, Castle offers to walk her back to her place and quips that it's not unlike the first time they had dinner together. But this time, Kate invites him inside. This time, it sticks. They get married a year or so later, two weeks before Kate's 40th birthday and four months before she's tapped to run for the US House of Representatives.

[xxlady-lunaxx]

Finally! | {KokuZan}

Theme: Fluff

Note: Ngl the picture is so cute >w<

(pt. 2 is here)

Muzan ordered the Uppermoons to him at an unusual time—close to dawn. They all bowed to him once they were all there, and he turned with a triumphant look on his face—something they'd never seen before. And it shocked them, of course. 

But then he held something up. A blue spider lily. THE blue spider lily.

A collective round of gasps filled the room, including from Nakime who hadn't known about this yet. 

Muzan's eyes sparkled. "I have gotten it, finally. The blue spider lily."

All of the Uppermoons completely forgot their formality and began speaking all at once, staring up at it in wonder. 

"Where did you find it??" Daki said, gazing up at it with curiosity.

"Have you seen if it works yet?" Gyokko added.

"Will we be able to use it??" Hantengu asked, trembling. 

"When did you find it?" Douma said. 

Akaza crossed his arms. "How did you get it? Will we find more?"

Kokushibo stayed mostly quiet though his eyes stayed on the blue flower. 

Muzan cleared his throat, silencing all of them. "I have not tried it yet. I do have more. And I'm going to have one of you to test it, to try it out." 

All of them waited with bated breath. Who was going to have the honor to use it first?"

"Kokushibo." Muzan looked down at the Uppermoon from his stand on the platform—he prefered to be standing above them. 

Everyone turned to Upper 1, who stood silently, shocked—though no one could tell. Then he said, slowly, "When is this happening?"

"We will go now," Muzan informed him. "I have already gotten things ready."

Kokushibo nodded and waited as Muzan dismissed the other Uppermoons, telling them that they will be updated when they need to be.

Then, the demon lord turned to Nakime and said, "Bring us to my office." 

Kokushibo found himself in a room with some sorts of experiments going on on a desk. He saw the other blue spider lilies Muzan had acquired and inspected them closely. 

Then Muzan said, "Alright. You must eat this flower."

"Is that all?"

"Yes."

(too lazy to try and think of smth more fancy.. sorry..)

Kokushibo went to pick up one of the other flowers but Muzan handed him the one he'd shown to the Uppermoons. "Have this one since I've already got it here."

"Alright." Kokushibo eyed it carefully then brought it up to his mouth. At the last second he hesitated and said, "How are we to test it? Am I supposed to go in the sun? What if it doesn't work?"

Muzan waved him off. "We will put only part of your body in the sun. Like, cut off your arm and put it there. We have to be cautious."

Kokushibo nodded. "Okay." He carefully put the flower in his mouth and sort of stood there with the stem protruding from the opening of his lips as if it was a lolipop.

Muzan sighed. "Just, uh, chew it and swallow like it is some regular food you're eating."

"Mmkkaf," Kokushibo mumbled. ("Okay")

He chewed for a moment, not used to this weird consisitency (how to spell..) and then swallowed. "Now what?"

"We'll wait because it will probably need to, maybe, be absorbed into your blood and body, right? You should rest." Muzan took his arm and led him to a room with only a futon in the middle. "Sleep now and we'll see how it is tomorrow."

~~~

(this is so friking short it's only at 500 words-)

When Kokushibo woke up, Muzan was sitting next to him, seeming to be asleep. The Uppermoon sat up and glanced at his Master. Was he asleep?

"Ehm.. Master?" Kokushibo whispered.

Muzan didn't answer. He was probably asleep.

Kokushibo lifted Muzan carefully and placed him on the bed. He draped the blanket over him then stood and walked back to the office. He looked around and saw a book open on the desk. It was information on the blue spider lily, it seemed.

Apparently it only grew in the sun—which explained why none of them had found it—and that the species was extremely rare. Besides that, a little info on how to grow it but nothing else that seemed interesting to Kokushibo. (i think yk why I wrote that)

As he flipped through the pages of the book, someone walked over next to him. Muzan glanced at the book then said, dismissevely, "We're going to test the blue spider lily today when the sun comes out. I think it's midnight right now."

"Alright," Kokushibo responded, his eyes on the book. "Did you sleep okay?"

"I should be asking you that. Anyways, were you the one who put me in the bed-" Muzan asked.

"You looked tired."

He shrugged. "I got bored of waiting."

"Why didn't you go out?"

"When you first fell asleep it was daylight. And I fell asleep around sundown. Dusk." 

"Ah, alright." Kokushibo looked up. "Well, should we go and eat first before dawn?"

Muzan nodded. "Yes. And you will need to have energy to regenerate—though I don't doubt your ability to without energy anyways."

Kokushibo nodded. "Of course."

~~~

Muzan and Kokushibo stood at the very edge where the sunlight fell. It was midday and they were going to test the blue spider lily now. 

Kokushibo held out his arm and cut it off in one swift motion. Then he kept it away from what he'd cut off so it would regenerate a new one. Muzan took the part of his arm he'd cut off and tossed into the sun.

They waited a beat, watching for any sort of disintigration. 

Nothing happened.

They glanced at each other, shocked.

Kokushibo cut off another part of his body and put it in the sun. Again, it sat there unmoving, only bleeding. 

A smile slowly started to form on Muzan's face. "It worked," he whispered. "It works!! Finally!"

In all his excitement, he hugged Kokushibo tightly. He quickly let go, apologetic, then said, "Try going in the sun fully now!!"

Kokushibo nodded. He was nervous, of course, but seeing how it hadn't done anything yet and how excited Muzan was.. he had to.

So slowly, but surely, he stepped into the sun. The light warmed his body and face and he stood there, shock filling his features. His instincts didn't say run away. He was still alive. He was here and alive. He was in the sun and alive and.. 

Kokushibo turned to Muzan and smiled. "It worked," he said. "It worked."

Muzan looked giddy. "We must tell the Uppermoons. I have gotten enough spider lilies for all of us. We'll start right now."

Kokushibo went back into the shade and held Muzan's arm as they were teleported back to the Infinity Fortress.

Nakime, who had been as interested and anticipated as the rest of them, said, "Well?"

She saw their smiling faces and realized that it had gone well. She gave them a relieved smile then brough the rest of the Uppermoons. 

"It has worked," Muzan informed them. "He can go in the sun! I have blue spider lilies for all of you! We have finally achieved what we had never had before." He grinned. "We can go in the sun."

{Word count: 1205}

Lame ending tbh

anyways..

ALSO HELP I WAS GOING TO DO SMTH MORE LIKE THE PICTURE I PUT UP THERE BUT ENDED UP DOING IT COMPLETLEY DIFFERENT

AHAHHAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[w0w0zella]

um hello!!! im gonna be making a. bugbo murderstuck au Masterpost of sorts! I guess! ill format it like a q&a but im making up some of these questions myself. So lets get into it :3

this is a really long post! b careful :3

"what is murderstuck?" murderstuck is a Bugbo AU that made/am making (complicated wip status lol)! its a story that takes place a month and a bit after the events of familiar foe. Very long story short, gerbo ends up getting killed (on accident), joe then kills bugbo (On purpose) and joe seeks out thomas flyswatter for help. i have a post here that goes more into the story if you'd like to see it! vvv https://www.tumblr.com/w0w0zella/728157783124574208/ill-post-these-together-awawy-from-the-rest-of-the?source=share 

currently it is a well defined plot line that i and a couple other people have made art for,, and a work in progress fanfiction!

"why is it called "murderstuck"?"

murderstuck is actually (Believe it or not lol) a Homestuck thing! murderstuck is a specific part in act 5 act 2 of homestuck where one character kills someone and then someone else kills THEM, so i was like  Fuck yeah that makes total sense for this au. In all honesty, i just called it that cuz i needed a name to jump back to in discord for easy finding and it. Stuck i guess GIGGLES lol.

i am currently.  Semi looking for new name suggestions! so if anyone has any ideas !!!   Tell me !! Please !! I have No idea!! ((by the way, because murderstuck is already technically a thing, you need to tag murderstuck posts with #bugbo murderstuck or #bugbo murderstuck au or else it will be drowned out by all the homestuck art :3

(question by geluga on discord) "where did joe get his cleaver ? is it the same way he just happened to have an axe in episode 2 or is it from something else?"

yeah no i didnt really think out him having a meat cleaver lol. lets say thaat. umm. He got it becuase he was preparing bugbo a Yummy Meal (Steak is his Favourite or some  shit idk) !!!

i do NOT rmember why i gave him a meat cleaver aswell. If you want a Good answer, the reason i gave him a meat cleaver and not his Trusty Axe is because his axe would have been far too dull and bulky to slit bugbos throat. if you want the TRUE answer Its because i forgot he had an axe at all and thought the meat cleaver would look cool

(question by onyx on discord) "did gj feel bad after The thing or did he feel like totally justified"

AMAZING QUESTION !!!! Gradient Joe feels EXTREME remorse. of course when he looks back on it he knows why he did it, but if we're being completely honest; bugbo was immobilized. he did not need to kill bugbo. if he had killed him while bugbo was choking him, that would be a different story. but he killed him while he was backed up into a tree, immobilized and begging for his life.

he feels extremely bad ! Very extremely bad!

(question from ANON in my ASK BOX) "DUDE I LOVE YOUR AU SM RAUGHHHHH also question uhh where is hoppo in the au? we havent really heard about her"

So. During the events of this au. she is. away. like she usually is. Dont really know where! Shopping at grocery market. back at war. lost at sea. you decide. (More info on hoppo in the next question

(question by kets on discord) "uuhhmmmm what is the absolute WORST ending this au could have realistically?????????? like if it didn't end whene thomas was ocmforting joe idk :3333333"

OKAY i coudl see this one of a couple ways. First way is, bugbo wins. bugbo succeeds in choking joe to death, And now he is alone (til hoppo gets back) i said this one first cuz its probably not the worst possible thing, but i think it would be pretty terrible!

second worst would be if Joe waited for hoppo to come back instead of going to thomas for help. In my humble opinion, i think that hoppo is very stubborn and VERY loyal. so. (to me at least) it stands to reason that if hoppo came back, she would side with bugbo VERY hard. she would probably fucking hate joes guts, and that would be the worst  thing for him after everything he already went through. Maybe they would Fight too idk…

Very first worst would be if joe just straight up killed himself after killing bugbo. I could see this as a thing he contemplated, but if he actually went through with it?  Oh my god Fucking imagine. all of there corpses there for hoppo to find when she comes back. Thomas rotting away in his lair without anyone to talk to (and without knowledge of bugbos death) for years? Devastating.

other notable endings include Joe OR bugbo Killing themselves directly after gerbos death, hoppo ending up killing joe out of anger when she comes back, Or (In a silly alternate universe that We made on Disc Ord…) bugbo comes BACK to life and DRAGS himself to go kill joe HIMSELF!!!!!!

(question by DEMO on DISCORD) "is gradient joe book smart or money smart" i am going to kill myself and its your fault i think. never speak to me again (Joke)

NOTABLE INFORMATION:

as stated before, you need to tag murderstuck posts with #bugbo murderstuck or #bugbo murderstuck au or else it will be drowned out by Homestuck stuff !! i want to see all of your art and things!! Thank you!!

you are ONE HUNDRED PERCENT WELCOMED AND ENCOURAGED to make stuff surrounding this au! Please Please Show It To Me!!!

if you are drawing During Fight or. During Murdering bugbo or joe, here are some things to note! - bugbo attempts to choke joe to death during a part in the fight, and he almost succeds! This causes Permanent scarring on gradient joes neck, and scratch marks all over bugbos arms from joe clawing at them!!!

- joe ends the fight with his shirt partially open and his tie missing!

- joe breaks bugbos right leg! there is a noticable gash on his inner right knee!

- joe kills bugbo by slitting his throat with a meat cleaver!- after joe is done, he drags bugbos body over to where gerbo died! (he was crushed by the fallen Stone Structure!)

thank you all so much for the love and support with this au It means so much to me. thank you from the botom of my hart.  IF YOU HAVE ANY COOL IDEAS, MORE QUESTIONS, OR ANYTHING ELSE YOU WANNA SHOW/TELL ME, MY MESSAGES AND ASK BOX ARE ALWAYS OPEN!!!!!!

[violueta]

who else ready to YAP! hihi i go by a ton of aliases and forgot which one i applied with my bad but im mika and im here with jangmi, a brand new muse that i cant wait to develop with u all :D just drop a like and i'll send u a dm to get plotting :3 (my about section for her is coming soon..a lil busy atm T^T)

just some ooc info before i go on a massive ramble about her, im currently a full time student dealing with end of semester assignment rush and exams so excuse me if replies are sporadic..if i ever take over 24 hours please just bump me or something... im also really new to tumblr so..excuse any mistakes :3

sry 4 this i wrote it out n im too lazy to proofread

BACKGROUND

lee jangmi, born 3003 to a middle class family, being her parent's little girl who got spoiled beyond belief. the amount of stress her parents went through to have her made them treasure her greatly, always making sure she was always happy.

family life was good! family life was happy! until both her parents lost their jobs due to sizing down, leaving the family with a complete lack of income. her father found a job rather quickly but it paid significantly less than what they originally had and they were still relying on one income so things were a bit tight. jangmi was blissfully unaware of this fact at the bright young age of one, her parents always putting on their happiest faces to their daughter and still going out of their way to give her a wonderful childhood. with the help of her maternal grandmother, jangmi was raised in the most loving household a girl could ask for.

however, this lack of money was catching up as her mother fell behind in terms of systems, her father needing added packages and upgrades to work but not being able to afford any for his wife. this meant that her family had fallen to a socioeconomic status that terrascape paid less care to. one day jangmi's mother dropped her off at her grandmother's so that she could spend the day trying to find a job, as she had been doing for around three years at this point. that night, her mother never picked her up and her father called up, wondering if she was with jangmi.

she was not.

after a week or so, jangmi's father had accepted that his wife was gone. unable to deal with life without the woman he loved and a daughter that was constantly distressed with the lack of her mother, he gave jangmi to her grandmother and disconnected from terra to search for his wife, knowing she might've left him but she would've never left jangmi.

so from the age of four, jangmi was raised by her grandparents and their elderly neighbours and they raised her just as she was used to, loving and a little bit spoiled. being raised in such a good for environment, the girl is quite unaware of the bad side of the world; she thinks that terra truly is paradise where everyone is always happy and thriving, simply because that's how she and the people she's aurrounded herself with have done in life.

well, she tries to think that way at least. having her parents leave with the only explaination of 'they went on an adventure!' even at the age of 20 has her craving to know more, has her wanting to figure out what happened with her parents. once she hit her teens and started actively staying awake at night, she discovered a glitch in which the entire server just frozen in time? she's never actively done anything during this hour as the idea of fucking up something scares her greatly but, she's always blamed that glitch on the reason why her parents are gone.

for now she prefers living in ignorant bliss, treating terra the way that terrascape wants her to, as a modern day garden of eden which, it kind of is considring how lucky she's been in life. maybe her ignorance is just to avoid losing her lifestyle of living upper middle class, knowing the place is a lot darker than she puts on. even after bae gyuok, she chooses to ignore this massive event, acting as if nothing has happened in the first place. (although, in her own time she's trying to figure things out but, she isn't getting very far)

PERSONALITY

she's soft spoken and gentle, often just going along with the crowd and trying her best to fit in as she would rather die than ever be seen as different. she puts herself out as confident yet not cocky, extroverted but not loud; a perfect personality that will have people love her, just as she's always been loved by those around her. though her gentle nature and willingness to go along with people is natural, she's hardly the social creature she seems to be, preferring a night in with her grandparents and their dog watching old movies. she lacks her own perception of self as a consequence for trying so hard to fit in and she sometimes gets jealous of others who are more willing to be themselves, arguing with people who disagree with her out of sadness, not anger. she can let herself get carried away when spurred on and can be quite reactive at times, a reason why she surrounds herself with people so similar to her; she can keep her image.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

u see i kinda suck at these? i like coming up with plots with specific characters in mind BUTT!! here's some vague ideas.

friends, ex-crushes, aquaintances, neighbours, all that stuff. maybe someone who she finally expresses her worries to? like late night talks about terra and how theyre realising the system seems a lil..Off..

IDK! im okay with anything :D just (as i said before) give this a like or send a dm to me first if ur in the mood to plot with her! i can use dc if it's easier :3

[ramenremm]

FREDYA- MY FIRST CREEPYPASTA!!! AND OC FROM CREEPYPASTA FANDOM

Info:

This is my first Creepypasta and Anything related to creepypastas like this.

I know it came out a little embarrassing and silly, but I really wanted to start somewhere!!!

I'll insert more information later and hope to get better with each work

Keep in mind that English is not my first language

Love also yes Nina and Jane Is here because i thought it will be funny

ONE SHOT

The sound of a vicious cough followed by a dozen more sounds filled with pain and discomfort was something that had been standard every day for a dozen months. A standard to which I should have been accustomed, and yet my face expressed nothing but worry. My body lay inert on a small bed with blue sheets. The sun slowly appearing in the sky reminded me that I should get up soon, as the alarm clock lying on the bedside table often failed to do so. My mind was foggy from little sleep and dark thoughts. Things should have started to improve, and it didn't look like it.                        Another sharp attack of coughing coming from the next room made me rise to sit down. With dark eyes of distaste, I ran a quick glance over the floor of the room, where piles of various clothes and garbage were piled up. I was supposed to clean it up last night, but I was so tired from school activities that I completely forgot about it. Again.       

The only place where there were no scattered clothes was the mirror standing near the bed.       

I marked in my head to do it today, or at least try to, because otherwise my mother would do it, and that's the last thing I'd want.              I had a guilty conscience when she had to get out of bed unnecessarily, let alone clean up my mess. Speaking of my mother, Harper, it was from her bedroom that the sounds indicating ill health were coming. It had persisted for far too long, and despite trying various things, nothing seemed to work. That's what was causing me to get up and go to the small bathroom connected to the bedroom, and I felt like I wasn't fully in the world with my mind. Constant visits to doctors, specialists, anyone who fit the general description in any way did not work one bit. No diagnosis, no cure. No one knew exactly what was wrong with my mother, and they referred people to other people in the hope that they would get lucky there. They didn't get lucky. 

Looking in the mirror hanging over the sink at first, I didn't pay attention to my reflection only to a small piece of paper attached to the top. Today we had an appointment with another doctor, supposedly the best in his profession.                             

I had to write things down and leave them that way, because with the ubiquitous clutter in the room it was hard to find a scrap of space where it would stand out. I could still use my phone if only it wasn't perpetually discharged or lost. I myself was beginning to be a wreck of a person through worry. Shifting my gaze, I finally met my reflection, the bags under my eyes were the first thing to be noticed on my pale face, right after the already rather large faded scar on my cheek. Maybe I should be thankful that something else was distracting me from it? I cringed at the mere mention of the appearance of this addition to my skin.                                         

Going forward, however, it was no better, my black hair from lack of sleep and poor attention to my own health looked as if it was going to fall out at the slightest pull. Deep in my heart I hoped that this was not a true comparison, but only my imagination, but I was afraid to check myself. The answer came on its own, as there were already a dozen black hairs on the sink.         

Thanks to brushing my teeth, the flowing water from the tap drowned out the sounds of coughing at least for a while, but it seemed to me that I had heard them so often that they had already etched themselves in my memory enough to be heard anywhere anyway. Regardless of the noise.  Personal hygiene is the only thing I haven't neglected in my life since the nightmare began, constantly visiting various hospitals, offices and clinics forced me to keep my person clean, this didn't apply, however, to the even larger pile of clothes lying on the white bathroom tiles. I forgot to do the laundry. I was supposed to put them in the washing machine three days ago, however, I forgot about it again. Now I was sure that all my clothes were in that place, as opposed to on the floor of the bedroom, where their condition was no better.                                      I sighed to myself and crouched down to start searching through everything that was there hoping to find something that didn't smell so bad. The different colored clothes had all sorts of stains or just an unpleasant smell to the point that I started to feel frustrated. I felt like throwing it all away and crying, but in the end a plain red short-sleeved shirt and a pair of jeans that still seemed decent fell into my hands, it was better than nothing.

I changed my clothes quickly although a bit haphazardly, as I had to mend my pants a few times, but walking out of the bathroom back to my room I could say that I was ready for another day full of excitement.                                                             

Before I could even leave, I headed to my desk where lay scattered books and pages torn from notebooks. I could have sworn I was supposed to do something for school since there were so many pieces of paper, my memory, however, was not inclined to make my task any easier. I'll get another bad grade. If this keeps up, I'm going to have trouble passing this year, just what we needed.                       

I wiped my face trying to pull myself together somehow. We can always try to talk to the teachers! Not that my own mother's ill health was something I'd want to use for such things, but letting them know things weren't going well might at least give me a little more time. 

It's worth catching on to anything so much as to not upset her even more now. 

With this quickly concocted plan, I threw the books that seemed appropriate into my black backpack, which, by the way, also looked like it needed a decent wash, and later also included my phone charger and cosmetics. It was fortunate that here Sydney schools gave the option of using electricity. Water and toilet paper were hard to come by in the school bathrooms, so it was good that they gave us at least that much.                        Zipping up I looked this time at the cork board that hung in front of my desk, it was filled with unnecessary information. Along with the schedule of additional ceramics classes, I didn't need it at the moment, I mean, I didn't have time for it, someday I might come back to it. There's always time right?     

I put on my backpack and reached for my phone, which, as it turned out, still had a few percent in it, amazing.                                                                           

I might even be able to listen to some music before it goes out completely. With that thought in mind, I also reached for the white headphones on the cable and slipped both items into my pants pocket. Walking out of the room was sometimes a challenge along the lines of try not to trip, but I managed to do it without incident this time.                          I closed the dark wood door with a quiet clatter, giving myself some time before walking over to the other door. I knocked on it gently, and only after that did I open it and look inside.

- Did you sleep a bit?- I asked, looking deep into a room that was more dark than mine. My mother never liked to open the curtains from her window too much, it made the atmosphere even more unpleasant, but she could not be persuaded to do otherwise. My mother was already sitting on the edge of her bed and was visibly trying to stop herself from coughing by holding a cloth to her mouth, her hands shaking gently from the effort it was costing her. I felt my heart squeeze even more. Seeing her in such a state hurt.                                                         

For a while she couldn't even answer me, because every time she tried, she had to struggle again to catch her breath. With each such attack I was afraid that she would eventually break her ribs. 

-A little- she replied by waving her hand, thus dismissing the subject. If I had slept more than an hour myself, I might have believed her. Why else is she trying to deceive me after such a long time? 

-I'll be back around two in the afternoon. The last two lessons are substitutions at the library, I don't have to be at them. I'll come and we'll go to Dr. Wills.- I presented her with the plan for the day as we did every day. Sometimes I hated this school so much, it just took time away from me and us. 

- I can go alone, you don't have to always go with me- She muttered quietly, and I barely stopped myself from rolling my eyes. We had gone over this a large number of times, too. She didn't want to worry me, but she also knew that I would be even more worried if I didn't hear what the doctors had to say. And she continued trying to convince me. To no avail.

-Remember not to eat breakfast, because you need to be fasting so they can do possible tests. And check if we are sure we have all the documents- I said firmly, and for the last few seconds I watched her face looking at me in pain. Not because of my words or behavior, but because this is not how this situation should be. We were supposed to choose my studies and dorms together, not doctors still fearing for the worst 

-Two o'clock in the afternoon.- I repeated and walked away from the door to start going down to the first floor of the house. 

The gray walls on which hung white frames with photos of the two of us seemed even more overwhelming, which is ironic, because despite such colors earlier it seemed more lively here. The wooden staircase was even darker and duller, which was rare before through the constant obsession to clean that my mother had. Everything was more matte in my eyes. The living room, with its black couch, seemed dark through the drawn curtains and the TV turned off. I looked at it with sadness, for a long time, but I couldn't spend grieving for the soul of this house that had been taken away, or more like forcibly snatched away, because the hands on the small clock hanging on the living room wall were approaching dangerously fast the time at which I would already be late, even though I was specifically leaving early so I could walk to school. I could have taken the bus and had more time, sure, I just didn't see myself sitting around kids of all ages most of whom had too much energy for such an early hour. It was too overwhelming and settling, especially when trying to sort out my thoughts, in which there was also the same chaos.                                       

Reaching for the red sneakers, I could see how worn out they already were. The old version of my mom would have already chastised me for this, after all, I have so many other shoes, I don't need to walk around in the same ones all the time. As for now, Mom, you are not here in this condition, forgive me, I will wear these shoes again. Until you recover.       

Shoelaces tangled in my fingers, which annoyed me terribly, but I finally managed to open the door and go outside after this struggle.                                 

I closed the door quietly behind me and looked around. It was still early, so there weren't so many people on the streets yet, although some were also already leaving for work. 

The sky was pleasantly bright colors, after all, it was May, soon to be summer vacation. You could feel it in the air, it was also one of the reasons why walking was better than riding the bus. The cobblestones I walked on still had traces of chalk drawings on them in places. Kids did it all the time and some of the artwork was even cute, so other, I don't know if drawing a big dick in the middle of the sidewalk has any deeper meaning, but whatever your soul tells you. This road was so familiar to me that I didn't even need to look where exactly I had to go, I stared into the space in front of me trying to dig as much hope as possible out of the depths of myself for today. With each failed visit there was less and less of it, but it was still there. If you looked hard enough. Through this reverie I remembered about my phone only after a few minutes of walking, so I reached for both the phone and the headphones, and the black case with various stickers immediately greeted me, making me feel embarrassed. Who else decorates their cases like this?                                               

Firing up the device, I didn't expect it to keep going from the moment I picked it up on stand up, but it worked. It looked like it was on its last breaths, but it worked. 

Not wanting to test its endurance any longer, I clicked the green icon of the music listening app and went to my liked songs. I selected the first better song, which, as it turned out, was a Ms by alt-J. I can't remember the last time I listened to them. After turning up the volume enough that I could barely hear my own footsteps, I put my phone back in my pocket. If the music suddenly stops, I'll know it's disconnected for amen.                                  The longer I thought about today the more I began to ponder one question. Would I rather it turn out to be some kind of dangerous disease, or that nothing would turn out and we would live like this forever. Both answers made the future seem terribly cold and sad. Ignorance kills, but what can you say about getting news with a death sentence? In my opinion, the scales were very even between the two options. 

If I could, I would have taken it, and so I can only worry. It was killing me more and more. 

I don't even know when the song switched to meet me in the woods from lord huron. 

As I walked past one of the houses I saw a young woman with a baby in a stroller just out for a walk, Riley, had recently moved in here, and we often passed each other on our morning walks. My mother liked her terribly and always offered to help with her daughter, because being a young mother was not easy.  But she was lucky because her daughter Tiffany was a adorable baby. She rarely cried, in fact I don't know if I ever saw her cry. She probably took after her mother, the woman was always smiling too.

I don't know if I envy them more or hate them for what they have. Not that I can hate an innocent child, but the very image of them that I see. I quickened my step with my head lowered so that I didn't have to greet her. The bitter feeling inside was enough for this morning. Funnily enough, despite my fear of being late, I was a moment ahead of schedule. Less than ten minutes, however, it's always ten minutes to myself.                                   

The black gate of the school was already wide open, and through the open door of the school you could see people walking down the hallway going about their lives. A large part of these people were from the student club, probably hanging holiday decorations on the walls.                                         

With a quick mental countdown to three, I pulled off my headphones and reached for my phone to turn off the music, but the device's screen was already completely black. At least I now had a purpose than just sitting in a corner and waiting for the bell to ring. 

Passing between people was relatively easy when they were busy hanging up tacky posters promoting the selection of any of the summer activities. I didn't believe anyone was coming to most of them on their own.                                                                               

The school itself was quite large, with several classrooms and a reception area downstairs in addition to a locker room and lockers for the students, and display cases lined up against one wall showing all sorts of awards and diplomas won for our school. Most were probably bought at a pawn shop when no one was looking, I'm not judging, do what you can to have students. The dark staircase leading up was the second floor and then the second floor. I currently stopped at the first, because that's where I was supposed to have my first class for today, and the classroom where everyone should gather soon was open. My bench was next to the windows more or less in the middle, but I sat completely at the back, there were outlets there. A few minutes is nothing if I want to charge my phone, but it is likely that Matt, the person sitting here just happened not to be coming to the first lesson, which would be a salvation in this case. Plugging in the cable, I stared at the screen for a while in anticipation until the familiar icon appeared and it began to turn back on. A few more people came into the classroom, only out of the corner of my eye did I see a familiar face approaching where I was sitting. 

- I told you to buy a powerbank- Jane Richardson said with a small smile on her face while pulling my backpack from the chair next to me. We weren't particularly close, but it was always good to have someone to talk to in this place. Her dark brown hair was up in a loose ponytail, and her blue eyes expressed too much excitement for so early in the day. 

- I didn't have time for this, I'm still busy- I muttered leaning my head against my hand, but still looked in her direction. She was wearing a black T-shirt with the print of some band and jeans, nothing out of the ordinary, although it wouldn't surprise me if she came in something strange. I don't mean that in a bad way, it's just her style of being. 

- That's why I offered to buy it for you recently, and you refused- she reminded me of our conversation that took place probably a week ago. I hoped she would forget about it.  

- I will do it soon, so far stealing electricity from the school is quite convenient for me- I said with feigned confidence in my own words. Sometimes I was a little surprised that these sockets still work, it's probably a matter of time. Where do they actually get electricity here if some classrooms are not even lit? Does the director choose for himself what he wants to light at any given time? That would make an interesting conspiracy theory... I thought to myself for a moment drifting away from her words.

- Ugh, probably Nina has again found something related to fairing or some other crap- I was snapped out of my reverie by Jane's exasperated words, and it took me a moment, through a small amount of sleep, to even grasp what she was talking about. Nina Hopkins, an even more energetic girl who read too much about paranormal things, crimes and murderers, I didn't have TOO MUCH negative feelings for her, but I had to admit that she could annoy with her chirping about, for example, how someone quartered someone and ate them. 

- Does she have to announce to everyone what she has read?- I asked rhetorically trying to avoid eye contact with the girl we were talking about. Every time she turned her head vigorously it was her black hair and red streak that flew all around. It was impossible to ignore her completely.

- A better question is why she has to practically shout while telling these silly things-  replied Jane with a sigh, which was a mistake, because she did it too loudly, thus attracting Nina's attention.  Not five seconds passed, and she started approaching our bench. Her mouth opened before she was even completely beside us. 

- Hi Jane, Hi Daphne!- She called out turning the chair in the bench in front of us so she could sit facing us. 

- Hi nina- We said together resignedly, which did not discourage the girl, because she immediately started waving her phone with a purple case in front of our faces. I was very impressed that the poor thing had not yet flown out of it and hit the floor. 

- Look what I read! I thought nothing would interest me anymore, but yet I found it- She threw it excitedly, shoving Jane's phone to read what was displayed on the screen herself. Willing or not, I leaned closer to her to read it too, since I would find out what all the fuss was about anyway. Jane exchanged a glance with me before she started reading aloud something that turned out to be some kind of blog post? I couldn't see exactly, but that's what it looked like.

- I didn't know exactly what I was addressing until the letters F R E D Y A were marked on the quia tab, my friend was delighted that we had finally gotten through to her, it was what she wanted. They then began to negotiate, She needed the help of her powers to become prettier. Fredya wanted to become a physical figure in return. We were young, we didn't know what exactly she wanted, so X agreed. The transaction came to a close, nothing happened then after the conversation ended. No things similar to those scary stories about demons. It was completely as if nothing had happened. I came to the conclusion that she was mocking me and moving the marker herself to add some fear to the whole situation. We dispersed to our homes and everything quieted down for a few days. Blah blah blah, the last time I saw her it didn't look like her. Her eyes were all white and blood was pouring from her mouth, she was choking on it. I don't know where she is now, she's missing and no one has ever seen her again.Jane read, cringing at how poorly the story was written. It was immediately obvious that it was some kind of Creepypasta or something like that. 

- How exactly is this different from the millions of other scary stories you've made us read?- I asked, watching Jane pull out a water bottle as reading it finished her off.         Nina looked even more delighted by it all. 

- The fact that people were actually able to contact her! There are articles and videos!- She responded by snatching the phone out of Jane's hand to show the said evidence. I forgot not to ask about such things.

- It's just a story, just because ghost hunters on the internet made up that they contacted that whole Fredya thing, it doesn't mean that it really happened- Jane spoke up looking at Nina like a child who believes in the Bloody Mary myth. I felt the same way, I had already heard so many stories from her mouth that it was getting boring. 

- It's not about ghost hunters, the girl really disappeared after trying to summon her- She defended her opinion fiercely by showing us the phone again, this time with a real article in which they wrote about the disappearance of a young girl after playing at contacting a demon named Fredya. The disappearance was real, the circumstances didn't have to be. 

- Nina. A real person went missing, the fact that she was playing with something like this has no connection to it, it's possible that some psychopath is holding her, and you're making proof of the existence of demons. Grow up.- Jane reprimanded her, annoyed by her behavior and how she approached it. 

- If you already want to walk and talk about all this, then ask everyone if they have not seen her. - She added looking at her with squinted eyes. Her words caused Nina to fall silent and get up to walk away from us. 

- You might not have been so sharp- I muttered as I watched her return to her seat. Jane was right, but she could have done things differently.Especially since Nina now looked like a kicked dog.

- Someone needs to talk some sense into her- She just replied and shrugged her shoulders. I didn't even know what to say anymore and fortunately the bell saved me from that. Now most of the class was already inside and sat down in their seats. No one rebuked the seats where Jane and I were sitting together.                                                      The teacher appeared as soon as the last person entered. You could see from her face a tiredness similar to the one we all felt, this meant another almost slow lesson. We only learned history in theory.                                    Teacher started the lesson by reading something from the textbook, and I rested my head against my hand starting to drive my eyes around the classroom to stay awake. Daily insufficient sleep got me just at such moments, but I couldn't afford to sleep in class, because after the last time, the teachers would start asking if I was okay, and I didn't need their worries, at least not yet. When I start failing seriously, I'll think about it then.

My gaze finally fell back on Nina, who was sitting quietly and writing something down in her notebook. I stared at her for a little longer than I should have. Something in my brain whispered again a few sentences from the article she had read to us.   There is no point in typing this and reading it, please give me something else to occupy my time.....

I barely held back a sigh when I turned my phone on again. Being careful not to disturb the teacher, I started searching for something more about "Fredya" maybe it was her funny name that made it so memorable. I felt surprised to see a lot more information containing this strange name.    Okay, reading it was much more interesting than the story. 

"Fredya is a demon who preys on people's greed. All who turn to her are those who have too little or want more. They ask for many favors and she grants them, while taking away even more. Every wish has consequences depending on what you wish for."

I read my mind while trying not to roll my eyes. Totally sounded like a creepypasta created by a bored teenager. 

"There are many ways to contact her, some more effective, some less. The most popular method is to use a quia board, but you have to be careful when doing so. Just because a demon introduces itself by some name or confirms its identity, it further does not mean that you are talking to it personally." 

What kind of idiots would be so desperate to use a quia board to help them in their lives. You are asking for more problems yourself.

"Fredya's summoning ritual was written down by an unknown person, several people confirmed its authenticity, however, this is left for everyone to judge for themselves. All you need to perform the summoning is something sharp, a mirror and a dark room.

Execution: We lock ourselves in a dark room together with the mirror, we need to make sure we are alone, otherwise the energy may be disturbed. We sit in front of the mirror, preferably as close as possible. We take a sharp tool that we will use for the most important point. We need our blood, the place where it is taken is an important element during what we want to ask for. The more help we need, the more serious the place of collection should be.                              For example, if you need help with your love, the wrist is enough. We then smear the blood on the mirror where our eyes are reflected. During this process, we say the words given below. 

Within a minute you should get an answer.

-

ሁሉን ቻይ ፍሬዲያ፣ ለእርዳታዎ በመለመን አነጋግርዎታለሁ። ያለኝን ሁሉ እሰጥሃለሁ። ኃይልህን አበድረኝ፤ በምላሹ ራሴን ሁሉ እሰጣችኋለሁ። ቃሎቼን አድምጡ -. 

I felt like my brain stopped working after reading this. It's been a long time since I read something so kitschy. It was so stupid that I turned off my phone and started listening to what the teacher was saying. Jane glared at me over hearing me put my phone back on the bench, but I just nodded so she wouldn't pay attention. It was so irrational that I had it in my head all day. In every lesson, whenever my mind started to get bored it went back to those words. That is, he did it at times when I happened to be awake. Even while eating a stupid sandwich bought with money scavenged from the bottom of my backpack, I couldn't focus on anything else. I read a few more articles, most of which were similar to the one in which there was a recipe for recall, that is stupid. 

I don't even know when the lessons passed so quickly, this is one of the few such days.

- Are you coming to my place? We could do this paper together- Jane said as we walked out of the school building along with many other people who randomly pushed us. 

- I would like to, but I have to go home, I'm going to a meeting with my mother- I replied sighing at the fact that I had to refuse. Working for literature lessons was always an ordeal, however, was one of the last points of my worries. The first was a doctor's appointment for which I was about to be late. 

- Again? Good luck, call me if you change your mind. See you- She called out to me before she disappeared with the others walking toward the parking lot where some of the parents were waiting. I didn't even have time to answer her, but I knew she wouldn't hold it against me. It was time to get back to listening to music. 

Without waiting long I immediately sped up my stride and quickly found myself on the road home holding my headphones in one hand and my phone in the other.                        Trying to avoid others walking in the same direction, I started texting my mother asking if she was ready to go out. I didn't get a reply right away like I usually do, but I wasn't worried about it somehow, she was surely getting ready or trying to catch her breath after a coughing attack, so I shifted my attention to finding some song.                         

The cold air hit my face making me shiver. I hated this kind of weather, the sun seemingly still shining, yet it was so terribly cold. At least it was some way to wash away any residual fatigue. 

I didn't have to try to keep my eyes open as hard as I would have expected, for my attention was caught by a rather large gathering of people on the street between the houses in my neighborhood. The fact that there was also an ambulance standing between them didn't help to curb the anxiety which immediately made me feel as if a stone had dropped in my stomach. 

I knew what was going on, even though I begged in my mind that it was a mistake.

A brisk walk turned into a run when I started running straight toward my house where there seemed to be the most heads turned. 

- Daphne!- called out Riley trying to stop me from running too close. She didn't make it. Before anyone could stop me I found myself standing in front of my house, the door of which was wide open, and an ambulance was standing not far away. I was in such shock that I didn't know until the end what I was looking at.                                                             

Through the open door it was possible to see the three paramedics leaning over my mother lying on the ground. Her eyes were closed and her lips were slightly parted. My eyes widened at this sight, I felt all the air escape from me. 

- Mom- I said expecting her to look in my direction or do anything. She didn't respond. 

- Daphne, don't look at it- Riley turned to me again, this time coming over to block my view of my mother's resuscitation. I was so blown away by what I saw that I couldn't even break free from her grasp. 

I was unable to put together a single thought in my head, and the words that came out of my mouth were unintelligible gibberish. 

- Please make way for us- Commanded one of the paramedics quickly exiting the house towards the ambulance, leaving my mother with the other men who exchanged glances with each other, thus ceasing their vigorous actions. 

- No- I choked out, realizing that they were no longer trying to save her, they were letting her lie with her eyes closed and such a calm face she had not had in a long time. 

- No, what happened- I repeated falling harder into the arms of the woman, who herself was shocked by what she was seeing. My headphones fell to the ground, now completely forgotten.

- Shh, don't look, don't look- she said pressing my head against her shoulder, but this did not help the feeling of grief filling my heart. It all happened so suddenly and fast, I was not able to process it.  

- I have to go with him- I said, watching as the rescuer who had gone to the card earlier was now returning with a stretcher to take the My mother's body. 

- You can't, your Aunt Margaret will arrive soon, she will take care of you. I called her- Riley answered me, but it did not reach me. I struggled with her to raise my head and look once again towards the house, ideally to see how they carried her on the gurney. Her body was so.... Strange. She was not shaken by any coughing attacks, she allowed herself to be touched. 

Why didn't she say anything, didn't even look in my direction? 

I don't even know when my knees gave in under me. If it weren't for the fact that Riley's arms were holding me, I would have definitely felt concrete. 

- please disperse, really- Repeated one of the rescuers walking ahead, I also felt then how I was pushed aside to make way for them. Her face was so pale when they moved her next to me, I wanted to reach out my hand towards her, but I couldn't move, I felt like I was frozen. 

- I have to go with her- I repeated in amok, but got the same reaction.

- Margaret will be here soon, let's go home.- She whispered raising her hand to stroke my head, then I finally broke out of her grasp. The people watched the ambulance door close and then turned their gaze toward me, as if anticipating some kind of reaction. I saw in their faces grief, sympathy, everything one could feel when looking at a child who had just lost his mother. 

- Daphne?- said Riley looking at me worriedly. I opened my mouth, but no words came out of it. 

I couldn't stand the feelings and their stares. With a shaky step I walked towards my empty house and without waiting for anyone else to react I slammed the door behind me locking it as I always did when I returned. My gaze immediately fell on the floor where just a moment ago my mother was lying. Nearby lay her phone. It was switched off. How had this happened? It was bad this morning, but it always was. She should be here, we should be leaving now to see a doctor. 

Why was it so quiet here? 

She had to be here somewhere, it didn't happen. 

Barely taking breaths, I started walking to the living room, my backpack fell from my shoulders and fell somewhere on the floor, I didn't pay attention to it, just like the fact that I was still holding my phone in the steel grip of my left hand. I had no control over my body. My eyes scanned the space of the room looking for signs that she would be here somewhere soon. Everything was just as I had left it that morning, no signs of this bad situation. 

- this can't be happening- I whispered and tears finally began to flow from my eyes. Only then did I feel what it meant to really suffocate. All the air from my lungs was taken away in such a brutal way that a piercing pain went through my chest. 

- Daphne? Please let me in, you shouldn't be alone- called out Riley knocking on the front door, but her voice was distant to me. I didn't even fully understand what she said. 

- That's not true- I said to myself staring at the floor before I started hitting my head with my hands. The sobs continued to shake my body barely allowing me to stand up straight. 

- That's not true!- I shouted this time and threw the phone somewhere further away from me, but soon my hands were filled with my hair, which I began to pull. 

- She is alive- I continued to scream unable to calm down.

- Daphne!- Riley continued to prefer knocking harder on the door. The loud sounds brought me back to reality a little, but they didn't help bring me under control. 

My gaze swept quickly across the room once more before stopping on the phone. With a quick step I found myself at the device which was lying on the ground next to a small table. The screen had a few cracks, but when I turned it on it was working flawlessly. 

Through my tears I could barely see what I was doing, that didn't stop me. All I had in my mind was this stupid empty name and the desire to be with my mother.

After making sure everything worked, I took a quick step toward the kitchen. I knew exactly what I was going there for, the top drawer in one of the cabinets. That's where the cutlery and all the knives were. By my vigorously pulling the drawer handle, the metal shook loudly in the room. I pulled out the largest blade we had in the house. 

- Daphne, please don't do anything stupid!- shouted Riley in the background below as I started walking toward my room. It was the only room in the house that had a large mirror. 

Running up the stairs with one hand, I started going back to the article I had read just a few hours ago. I didn't care how silly it looked, all I felt was pain in my heart. I knew that normally I wouldn't be able to do anything.

My room was crowded by everything I hadn't cleaned, in front of the mirror, however, there were only a few scattered clothes. 

Throwing my phone and knife on the ground, I walked over to the window to close the curtains, but leaving enough room for the room to still be lit. 

I felt like I wasn't myself, as if everything that was happening was in my head. 

As soon as the room was darker I sank to my knees in front of the mirror. I couldn't catch a single normal breath even though my sobbing had calmed down enough for me to utter words. 

Looking at myself in the mirror, I didn't even recognize myself. I looked like a wreck of a human being, as if I was no longer human myself. My face was all red and wet with tears. 

Reaching for the phone once again I read everything although it was hard because of the blurry words on the screen.  

- That's it, you'll be with me- I said to myself without waiting a moment longer just putting the phone down, and grabbing my shirt to pull it over my head. The white bra was reflected in the mirror along with my skin which was not yet scarred by any wounds.  The knife was back in my hand, this time held firmly and securely. I knew I had to do it, so taking a breath I raised the knife and pressed the blade against the skin just above my heart. It was not going to be a deep wound, just enough for blood to appear. Without thinking about it for long I made a quick movement that made me take a loud breath. The adrenaline overflowing through me relieved most of the pain, but not completely. I felt the burning rosiness all over my skin, followed by the sensation of blood flowing slowly down the wound. Only then did I let go of the knife to collect as much of the blood as possible on my fingers.               

With my other hand, I turned the phone back on and scrolled to the last moment. That is, the words. It took an eternity to copy the text into the translator and see how it was spoken, enough to make the blood flow even more from the wound.

Feeling so much grief and injustice, my mouth opened before my brain had time to encourage me to stop. 

- ሁሉን ቻይ ፍሬዲያ፣ ለእርዳታዎ በመለመን አነጋግርዎታለሁ። ያለኝን ሁሉ እሰጥሃለሁ። ኃይልህን አበድረኝ፤ በምላሹ ራሴን ሁሉ እሰጣችኋለሁ። ቃሎቼን አድምጡ - I said in a trembling voice sure I was reading something wrong, and my fingers began to smear on the mirror, blurring my eyes with blood.

- Please kill as many people as you need, but bring her back to life- I added mindlessly looking at my figure. The silence falling after the last word was deafening and frustrating. Almost as if I were not in my room, but in solitary confinement. My throat tightened by the renewed urge to cry. 

- I want her back, I just want to see her- I whispered rubbing my face, accidentally smearing the remaining blood on my cheeks. 

The throbbing wound forced me to look in the mirror again, I don't even know when the blood slowed down and I didn't look at the wound after lifting my gaze. I couldn't when instead of my reflection I saw a black figure. Only then did it occur to me what I had actually done. 

- oh my god- I screamed, taking a step back, but still looking at something that should have been my reflection. My heart did not have a moment's peace, it was again beating as fast as before. 

- this is not possible- I muttered watching as something looking like a black mist disappeared more and more, showing my figure, as if nothing had happened. After a second, my reflection seemed completely normal, until I looked into my own eyes. I thought I was hallucinating because of everything that was happening when I looked at my face. My eyebrows furrowed and my head tilted slightly, checking to see if the reflection was really mine. 

It seemed that everything was ok, everything except my eyes. In the reflection, they were completely white. There were no irises in them. It must have been my imagination. 

Still filled with anxiety, I moved back to the front, slowly returning to the same spot as just before, perfectly in front of the mirror. 

The empty eyes that were supposed to be mine seemed to invade my soul, creating a pressure in me that I had never felt.

- What the fuck- I muttered moving even closer against everything my brain was telling me. The closer I got to my reflection the more it seemed to me that it wasn't me. 

Only when I was only a few inches from the glass did I realize how much of a mistake my grief had driven me into. 

My reflection tilted its head to the side with a mocking smile on its face and everything that happened next was too fast for me to react. 

My reflection's hands came out of the mirror and grabbed my hair, pulling my head hard against the mirror, hitting it and shattering it. 

The shattering glass being so close wounded my face and almost robbed me of my sight. 

Despite the blood now flowing in waves, I pushed myself away with my residual strength from the shards of glass and the now empty frame of the mirror. 

- no, no, no- I repeated trying to get up despite my shaking legs to run out of that room, but as soon as I rose to my feet, I felt my stomach clench so hard that I threw up the second breakfast I had eaten at school. In addition to the disgusting mixture, blood also flowed from my mouth. It was so sudden and powerful that it shook my whole body. I looked at it in horror and the sobbing now resembled a lament. 

- please don't- I screamed trying to reach the door, through my hand then such a tremendous pain passed as if someone had just broken it. I screamed falling to my knees and pressed it to my chest. 

- this can't be happening! What the fuck!- I shouted into the emptiness of my room. I did not get an answer. 

I only felt the pain from my hand being replaced by a headache that was like drilling a hole in my skull. I couldn't do anything but scream and try to free myself from this state while still curled up on the floor. 

- STOP IT- I screamed writhing from the ever-present pain I felt as if fire was burning my muscles, my head was filled with pressure and my mouth was filled with blood that I had to spit out to keep from choking. 

I don't know when my vision began to blur until the ability to see disappeared. I couldn't get rid of the feeling of losing connection with my body, as if I was being ripped away, all combined with endless suffering. 

The whole thing lasted maybe a few minutes until it quieted down completely. Everything. All the pain. All the blood flowing, the nausea. All that was left was nothingness. 

Through the fact that there were no longer any distractions, I could feel the fact that I could not move my own body. At all. 

Despite the desire to move my hands, or at least my head, I couldn't do it. It was as if I was in a conscious dream, paralyzed. 

I tried to say something, to call out to someone again in the silence of the house, my mouth remained closed. What was different was my eyes. I felt them open, without my control. 

My fingers began to move, I no longer felt the pain that previously radiated in my right hand. 

My whole body acted as if it didn't feel pain. It seemed as if my head was looking around before my body began to slowly rise. I couldn't do anything about it, I couldn't interfere. 

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 

I was just an observer.

- Thank you for letting me in. I will fulfill your words.- I heard a voice that once belonged to me, now sounding much more hollow. 

Immediately after that, I felt another strange sensation, and an image of what was happening to my body was revealed before my eyes. 

This thing... It really turned me into just an observer. 

- Let me out!- I screamed, watching in horror as someone controlling my body reached for one of my shirts lying on the floor. In the shards of glass I could see "my" reflection. My skin had lost its natural appearance, it looked almost gray, and my eyes were empty. Zero irises. White space alone. 

Blood was still everywhere, running down my face and chest. 

- You wanted this. You made it happen. I'll bring your mother.- replied the figure pretending to be me acting as if it owned my body. These words crushed me. 

- I take it back! It was a mistake!- I shouted trying unsuccessfully to regain control. "I" reached another time towards the floor, this time for a knife lying under other shards of glass. My mother would not want this, would not want me to bring her back by force. Why did I do that? 

- Too late.- That's all that came out of "my" mouth before my body started heading toward the stairs. I tried to fight with all my might, but it was no use. My figure easily passed through the living room without even looking at anything other than the exit door from behind which I could hear someone's conversation. If I had control of my heart it would have stopped at that moment. 

My neighbor Riley and Aunt Margaret. 

- Don't hurt them!-I shouted into the darkness I was after. "I" reached for the lock and opened it, then doing the same with the door. 

They immediately turned their gaze in our direction with worry. 

The other neighbors had already returned to their homes, but they were definitely watching. I wanted to warn them, tell them to run away, my voice was nothing. 

- Daphne! Honey I'm so sorry- Said Margaret coming up to "me" to pull me into a hug, when she came closer, however, she looked into my eyes, saw them, along with blood.

It was a moment when she suddenly leaned over feeling a piercing pain in her abdomen. 

- I'm fine- replied the figure claiming to be me and grabbed Margaret's arm to hold her down. 

- STOP! - I shouted wanting to close my eyes and not look at it, but SHE, forced me to watch the scene. 

- Daphne- Muttered Margaret at which THAT shook its head. 

- no, I don't think it's her- replied her icy voice, and then grabbed the knife dragging it up her abdomen, creating an extensive wound from which blood flowed. Margaret was unable to get out any words through the pain and blood flowing out of her mouth. 

Riley looking on stood as if frozen in place. Tears were streaming down her cheeks.

I wanted her to run away, to tell someone about it, to go back to her daughter, she was unable to. 

Before she could force herself to move it was the figure already at her side. 

- You can't tell the police about the wrong person- muttered the monster, and plunged the knife into the side of Riley's neck, piercing her arteries. 

- Why-is the only thing I could repeat after seeing this. I couldn't even cry, because I had no way to cry.

The monster in charge of my body only smiled 

- I return your mother to you.- she said dropping the knife on the ground next to the bodies of the women. 

All I could do was watch as my body began to walk away from the place that was my home, toward the next house. 

All I could do was watch. 

Pay for my greed.

[hearttohaato]

Encanto OC Event Week 2

Part 1: Tomás Herrera & The Madrigals

For this week about OC relationships, this'll be a perfect opportunity for me to introduce a couple background OCs that I wasn't able to last week. In order to prevent an insane amount of clogging I've decided to split the info into multiple posts, starting with the Madrigals' relationship with my favorite Just Some Guy: Tomás Herrera!

Tomás, like many other villagers within the Encanto, has lived his life understanding that the Madrigals were special people with incredible abilities. He's grown up respecting them as such, but eventually he'll come to find himself being taken in as one of their own and adopting their name - and their legacy. But though Tomás is happy to marry the love of his life and join her family, doing so comes with some difficulty adjusting to the new environment: he's gone from a household of four, to three, to two, to over a dozen. Everything gets so busy and bustling so quickly, and initially it's a little hard to keep up; for the first few years under Casita's roof, Tomás feels decidedly "un-ceptional" and like an outsider who is a Madrigal in name only. But as years go by and he gets more comfortable with all the new activity, responsibilities, and magic, he'll come to accept himself as being where he belongs just as the rest of the family already has.

In regards to Camilo Madrigal:

Tomás and three of his good friends (Santiago Torres, Cristián Vargas, and Rafael Molina) bond with Camilo as they and the rest of the town help to rebuild Casita after the events of the movie. Camilo had his own friends his age, of course, but there was something special to him about being taken in by a patch of older boys and being considered one of their own. He's simply Little Brother Shaped!

Though all four of them have their own dynamics with Camilo, Tomás and Camilo grow very close despite their seemingly conflicting personalities. Camilo aims to help Tomás loosen up and come out of his shell in ways he likely wouldn't attempt to do on his own, and in return Tomás offers Camilo stable and level-headed advice that is a welcome change in perspective from the kind he gets at home.

Of course they can get on each other's nerves, namely when Tomás won't budge or when Camilo's joking goes too far. But all in all they're a bulletproof duo, where Camilo gets the older brother he never had and Tomás gets to be the older brother he should have had.

Art by LintuShadow.Art (left)

In regards to Luisa Madrigal:

The experiences Tomás had growing up alongside Luisa Madrigal weren't unique nor exclusive only to him. He's hardly the first or only villager she's extended her hands to over the years - but from mundane favors to quite literally saving his life, everything Luisa has ever done for Tomás has meant the world to him, even if to her they were simply her duties as a Madrigal.

But despite what he may have believed, Tomás hadn't been completely invisible to Luisa. She knew him well enough as someone she grew up and went to school with, and though she was indeed doing what she needed to, she never really forgot any time she helped him (or anyone else). If anything, he was a friend to her!

What really sealed Tomás's fate was a moment he witnessed something he wasn't meant to, one that helped him recognize that someone as unremarkable as him and someone as special as her actually could have something in common: the mindset that one's own feelings could be ignored when there were more important things to worry about. From there admiration blossomed ruthlessly into a hopeless crush, and though it took him a while to be able to pull it off, he relayed his feelings to her through a simple gift: a hand carved wooden dove for her 20th birthday.

As a couple they compliment each other nicely, though in a different way than Tomás's friendship with Camilo. They are each other's pillar; his emotional stability allows him to support her in her time of need, whereas he feels safe and at ease when she's around. Luisa can very well take care of herself, this she and everyone else knows... but sometimes it's nice to sit back and let herself be treated like a princess, something Tomás is always more than happy to oblige. There's little room for arguments or disagreements between them, provided they don't try to out-martyr each other - sometimes it is necessary for one to wring true feelings and thoughts out of the other like they're pulling teeth. But they can't hide from each other, and over time it becomes much easier for them to be open and accept that maybe their feelings do matter when someone is willing to listen.

He is her osito. She is his paloma. he's so in love with her it makes him look stupid

Art by mushroomflood (left)

In regards to the other Madrigals:

Bulletpoints to make things go a little more quickly--

Julieta, as his future mother-in-law, is the closest thing Tomás has had to a mom since his own's passing. He's bashful around her for a while, even moreso when he gets the greenlight to start calling her Ma. He comes to enjoy helping her in the kitchen periodically, as he already has cooking experience from living with his father.

He wants to make a good impression on Agustín very much, despite how remarkably easy it is to get on the man's good side - all Tomás really had to do was promise to take care of his daughter and Agustín was sold. Tomás would like Agustín to teach him how to play piano but he doesn't know how to ask.

Mirabel, by virtue of hanging out with Camilo a lot, ends up getting close to Tomás as well. Tomás doesn't know how he ended up with not one but two teenage ducklings following him around but he's not mad about it. When Tomás and Luisa become engaged, Mirabel gifts him with an embroidered vest that he wears all the way up until the wedding.

The only problem Tomás has in regards to Antonio is that he's terrified of wild animals. Antonio himself is a perfectly sweet kid and Tomás is kind to him when he wants to socialize, but he'll be a little on edge if Parce decides to tag along. It likely takes years for him to get used to having the denizens of the jungle waltzing around the house, but he comes to trust Antonio to keep a handle on them.

Alma intimidates the hell out of him, especially since he's in a very Agustín-like position of probably not being her first choice to wed one of her grandchildren. But he'll prove himself to her in how devoted he is not only to Luisa but to Camilo as well, and eventually earn her blessing (to which he's both grateful and relieved).

Similarly, Isabela is a little tough on him at first and is the one to give him the third degree when she finds out he's involved with her baby sister. She recognizes he's kind of a marshmallow soon enough though and eases up on him after that. There's a cordial mutual fascination between the two and their skillsets, given Isa's ability to conjure trees and Tomás's ability to turn those trees into something new.

Tomás and Dolores are shaking hands over being exasperated by their goofy little brother Camilo, but beyond that their lowkey personalities mesh quite well. Oddly enough, between Dolores's Gift and Tomás's natural observational skills, the two tend to have enough information between them to quietly discuss goings-on around town.

Pepa and Félix are a little more removed from Tomás due to him being a cool color family addition, but as housemates there's still interactions to be had. Félix's extroversion brings a lot of energy Tomás doesn't always know what to do with and Pepa's storms take some time to adjust to, but all three of them readily agree on how much they care about Camilo and that's all that's really needed to keep the harmony.

Bruno keeps to himself more often than not and Tomás wholeheartedly understands. That said, once Tomás gets a good read on how Bruno operates and how best to approach him, they're able to have a rather polite rapport. The rats skeeve Tomás out a little but they're no big deal compared to things like jaguars and anacondas, thus Tomás can be convinced (by Mirabel and/or Camilo) to offer his talents and build little sets for Bruno's telenovelas.

Mariano is in the same boat as being a mundane marrying into a very non-mundane family, and with the added history of being casual friends beforehand Tomás ends up gravitating towards him as they adjust to their new lives as Madrigals. They, along with Camilo, end up becoming more or less the second generation parallels to the Madriguys that came before them - Tomás's Agustín to Mariano's Félix to Camilo's Bruno.

Art by cringecanto

Part 2 will be coming shortly! Then, as I'm fairly certain it's already technically Week 3, the post for that week's prompt will follow sometime soon after.

@encanto-extended-edition

[eventinelysplayground]

New Experiments

This story is the third one from my WIP Poll a while back just two left now! I'm not 100% on this fic but I'm overall happy enough with it. This one is a bit different as it focuses more on Emma with a side character that we haven't seen in English yet but she's been in several fan translated events and I wanted to expand on Emma's relationships with people outside of the princes. The only info needed is that Yuel is an apothecary/pharmacist who becomes Emma's teacher after she moved to Jade. I don't know the fandom overlap here but Yuel gave off major Matsu from Sekirei vibes whenever I would read events she's in so that along with the translations was my guide for her. There will be a sequel to this in the future just I wanted to do them as two seperate fics. Yuel and Emma conduct an experiment which leads to both of them being excited for different reasons. WC approx 1379. CW: mentions of pregnancy. Also thank you to the ancient Egyptians for their knowledge which made this story possible.

“Now this plant is quite interesting! It has strong implications as a replacement for some harder to find ones with minimal effect on efficacy which would open up so many possibilities. Oh, but do be careful when handling it as it's thorns are extremely sharp and.. Emma?”

Emma was having a lesson with Yuel on some of the new plants being cultivated at the palace, or at least she was supposed to be having one. All her mind could seem to focus on was the scents.

“Emma!”

Emma's head reflexively moved back as Yuel snapped her fingers in Emma's face.

“Yuel, I'm so so sorry!”

“What's gotten into you Emma? Normally you're a model student but lately it's been hard to get your attention.”

“I know and I'm sorry it's just…”

“Just what?”

“The plants.”

“The plants?”

Emma watched as Yuel looked around at the various plants she had brought out for today's lesson.

“Is one of the new ones bothering you?”

“It’s not just the new ones, it's all of them.”

“All of them? Are you sure?”

“Yes! All these plants and flowers, and the wet soil ugh.”

Emma dropped her head onto the desk in frustration and let out a long sigh.

“I don't know why but any strong scent lately bothers me, I can't even stand the smell of roses anymore!”

Emma looked up at Yuel to see her staring down at her with her arms crossed over her chest and a sneaky smile on her face.

“Let's forget about these for today, I have something else I want your help with.”

“What?”

Emma was yanked from her chair as Yuel pulled her up and started practically rushing out of the room and down the hallway.”

“Wait Yuel, where are we going?”

“First I need to stop by the palace infirmary and pick up what I need for my experiment then we're going to my quarters.”

“What experiment? Can we even do an experiment in your quarters? Yuel? Yuel!?”

Now it was Emma who found herself being ignored, apparently forgotten in Yuels enthusiasm. Just as they reached the infirmary Yuel came to a sudden stop.

“Actually it's probably better if you wait here for me Emma. I'll be right back, don't go anywhere!”

Emma watched as Yuel hurried off into the infirmary. She hadn't been waiting very long when she heard a familiar voice call out to her.

“Emma?”

“Prince Keith!”

“What are you doing outside the infirmary, did you get hurt? Are you alright?”

Emma waited as Keith walked towards her looking concerned.

“It's sweet of you to worry about me but I'm fine.”

“Are you certain? I know you said as much this morning but you really have seemed unwell lately.”

“I'm certain. I'm just waiting for Yuel she said she wanted to-”

“Talk to the physicians about an order that I completely forgot about! It's all sorted now though so if you'll excuse us your Highness but we need to get back to the lesson, come along Emma.”

“Oh okay, I'll see you later Emma.”

“Yes of course!”

Emma once again found herself being dragged along behind a quickly moving Yuel. Once they were safely away from the infirmary Emma spoke up.

“Just what exactly is this experiment if you aren't telling Prince Keith about it?”

“You'll see soon, my quarters aren't far and I promise to explain everything then.”

Those were the events of five days ago and they kept playing over and over in Emma's mind making it hard for her to concentrate on anything else. She had gotten up early and was now just about sprinting through the palace hallways on her way to her teachers quarters. It wasn't easy keeping a secret from Keith and she hated to make him worry about her still but it was best to wait. She reached Yuels door and had barely knocked when it flung open and Yuels arm shot out grabbing her and pulling her inside.

“I was going to go and get you if you hadn't shown up soon.”

Yuel enveloped Emma in an almost smothering hug.

“Come take a look.”

Yuel gestured towards the workbench set up in a corner of her room. Emma let out a breath she wasn't aware she was holding and slowly walked towards it. On top were three dishes containing some seeds, the seeds in the first dish still looked dormant but the seeds in the other two had begun to sprout. It had worked, it had really worked! Emma was hit with waves of emotion and she clasped her trembling hands over her mouth in shock.

“Oh Emma!”

Yuel placed her hands on Emma's shoulders from behind keeping her steady on her feet.

“I…it really worked.”

Emma's voice had been trembling at first but now she was laughing as she looked between Yuel and the seeds.

“We didn't make any mistakes? Everything was how it needed to be for it to be accurate?”

“What kind of questions are those!? We did every step perfectly Emma, our control seeds are responding as they should and our two test seeds are doing just what I told you they would.”

“So then-”

Yuels loud laughter cut off Emma's question.

“Yes Emma I can say with almost eighty percent accuracy that you are with child. You'll still need to wait a month or two for the palace physicians to be able to confirm it physically but that's more just precautionary really.”

Emma was shocked, though not as shocked as she had been when Yuel first explained the experiment to her.

“These are grain seeds but under the right circumstances and environment they have a very special purpose, they can be used to tell if a woman is with child.”

Yuel was staring at Emma with a serious but soft look on her face.

“What, me?”

“Well it's certainly not me!”

“But…what makes you-”

“The aversion to scents. It's not an entirely common symptom but it happens and usually quite early on. These seeds will be able to tell us with an almost eighty percent accuracy.”

Emma sat there blinking at Yuel while still trying to process what she was hearing.

“I've never heard of there being a way to confirm it so early other than well…”

“Most Jadeans are aware of it but the seeds are incredibly finicky so we don't export them. If even one thing is off, the temperature, moisture in the air, exposure to light…any of them can affect the accuracy and render the results invalid so it can only be done by specially trained apothecaries or physicians. Only two of us in the palace have the training required but this is an excellent opportunity to teach you how as well.”

“What if I make a mistake?”

“Don't worry about that. Alongside the one you do we'll have a control as well as one I perform myself, also nothing will be said to anyone outside the royal family or head physician for a while. Although the test is incredibly accurate when done properly there have still been inaccurate or inconclusive results so nothing is announced publicly until the physician's final physical confirmation.”

Emma was pulled out of her reverie by an excited and quickly talking Yuel.

“This is such wonderful news! A new little prince or princess and so many new experiments and formulas to try out, I can hardly wait!”

Emma felt Yuels hands release her shoulders and watched her almost jump up and down with joy.

“New formulas for what?”

“Well first we have to figure out something for your sense of smell. Then if you have trouble keeping down food, something to help with that. A compound to make sure you're getting an adequate amount of nutrients, maybe something to help you sleep later on. You'll definitely need something to help with aching muscles and a new cream to help minimize the stretch marks. That's probably going to be the most difficult one, I mean you're so tiny compared to his Highness…”

Emma sat down in a chair smiling and listening to Yuels obvious enthusiasm then slowly ran a hand over her stomach. She almost couldn't believe the news and was overcome with joy at the thought of the, hopefully small, baby to come.

[angelpuns]

Since u want it Ranting anon will do their thing (Btw I use any pronouns so dw about gendered terms :D) and rant! So I'm gonna talk about executive dysfunction because that an be useful to know for pretty much anyone! So executive dysfunction is the way your brain works, specifically the executive functions lol, don't work the way they should. The three main things that are kinda "messed up" in a sense are your cognitive flexibility (ability to go from one task to the next,) your inhibition control (ability to control what you do, say and thing,) and your working memory (your ability to remember things regarding a task your doing for the duration of the time your doing that task, like short-term memory)

So the cognitive flexibility thing is the most noticed one because it makes it hard to do things like taking care of yourself or actually completing a task. The best way I've seen it described was by this one person on tiktok who compared it to trying to touch a stove or climb down from a tree, even if logically you know its safe something in you just won't let you do it. It's like that but for simple things, it tends to stunt your ability to gain habits because something that you could do easily one day all of sudden you can't bring yourself to do today while you have a voice in the back of your head telling you that it's easy and that your pathetic for not doing it. The reality is that it isn't easy, you could have everything set up for you, all you had to do was push a button but because you were already stuck on one task you can't switch over to hitting that button. It's not you deciding to not do something, it's your brain not letting you actually do that thing.

That also ties into the inhibition control, your brain might let you do one thing super easy, or actually make you do that thing but it wont let you do something else, it's not something you can control in the slightest because it's literally just how your brain works. You aren't being lazy, it's honest to god hard for you to actually start doing that thing. Once you actually start its the easiest thing ever, it's just actually switching to starting that task that feels impossible (again, cognitive flexibility).

The working memory thing is actually working on a task, maybe you were going to write an essay but you got distracted reading and spend 12 hours on that and then had to rush your essay but you also forgot to turn it in because you were thinking about what you were reading. Another thing connected to that is actually starting a task, it can be hard to start it when you can't imagine the end product, that's because if you don't have something in your memory that you can follow, something you've done before so you have something to re-stash into that working memory category you can't really figure out how to do and we repeat back to cognitive flexibility (at least that's what I've noticed with myself, if I don't have knowledge on how to do something, a format to follow, I can't do it.) There are a lot of examples for all of these and these are sort of just what I've figured out myself, I may not have explained it the best so I suggest doing your own research if this is a topic that interests you!

I got all my information, for the most part, from the Cleveland Clinic website, I will share more when I figure out how to put what I mean into words, hope this helps with any struggles if you were confused about something and found this related to you <3 There is a lot more to executive dysfunction but this is already very long and I will get into that another time! >:3 (Btw, again, this might not be 100% accurate so again if you really want to, do your own research but I will share what I find once I have more info!)

OOOOOOH INTERESTING!!!!!!

I am downloading all of this into my brain thank you! The working memory thing is so relatable, I literally have done the Sims 4 thing where I walk into a room ( while thinking of something else) and then forget what I was doing and then i go back and remember and then I forget again and it's like the longest memory loop ever.