#completely facetious
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shoolis · 28 days ago
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It’s been a while
Since I could
Eat a big sandwich
And it’s been a while
I’m really hungry
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atimeofbeing · 5 months ago
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Gotta admit, it's weird to finish what feels like the best show ever made and then its just you and your 5 mutuals talking about it. What do you MEAN you didn't all sob over the final episode of Jeongnyeon yesterday? What do you mean that you can think of literally anything else?
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Vale on his rivalry with Sete [from an interview post phillip island 2004; autotranslated from spanish; source: as dot com]
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rebelontherocks · 1 year ago
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i think what a lot of people need to understand about dune is that frank herbert watched lawrence of arabia which is a movie based on the real life account of a real man who fought alongside arab tribes and peoples in a revolt against the ottoman empire. It's also a scathing takedown of the white saviour, just a clinical excision of why exactly there's no such thing. It paints a vivid picture of british imperialism and why 'good men' working from within said empire can do fuck all to help liberate anyone. it's also a really heartbreaking gay love story, and it gave the world one of the greatest romantic heroes in Sherif Ali.
Frank Herbert saw all that and decided, but what if it was homophobic instead, and there was desert cocaine and worms, and the white saviour had superpowers as a result of eugenics.
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boypussydilf · 2 years ago
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so funny when people will be like “i wish there was more fan content about what simon went through trying to survive in the post apocalypse and take care of marceline while losing his mind” i know this really great story about that actually it’s called marcy’s super secret scrapbook by olivia olson,
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why-bless-your-heart · 1 year ago
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Actually you can never consider yourself saved, hope this helps.
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morphogenetic · 4 months ago
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was trying to explain the rpftourney nonsense to someone I know irl (not a friend but shes some flavor of sapphic so we Vibe More yknow) and said "do you know what real person shipping is" out loud. and after I explained the tumblr poll thing she was like (while pointing at me) i like your shoelaces. humiliating
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chickenisamazing · 6 months ago
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I feel like more and more lately whenever people around me talk about "being a girl" I just cannot relate. Idk if it's just me or if it's everyone else
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dracolizardlars · 10 months ago
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I think vets should offer spay/neuter surgery for humans. Probably get it done much more efficiently than doctors, and would do it without having to be convinced that you absolutely definitely do not ever want children and will never want children, or needing a "medical reason" to do it
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viktoriakomova · 2 years ago
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Also… (I am guilty of this too, both ends of it, I won’t pretend im not! but) when fans say stuff like “ROBBED OF A 10” on a routine that got like a 9.925 but didn’t have any errors so clear you could see them from outer space, and other fans jump in and point out like 3-4 valid deductions (leg seps, soft knees, bad alignment on leaps, sloppy footwork, etc). That’s like…….. kind of the point tbh ? 😭
I mean if you can identify those errors in a routine that scored that high, the judges can too. And if you want to go through all the routines in a rotation at that level of detail, I can guarantee you’ll find them in like 80% of the others too at least, on top of the indisputable landing deductions and clear form breaks many of them got. If you want to point out the minor deductions as a counter argument that’s logically totally valid, but also like….. if that’s the case, if that’s the standard you’re judging them against, then practically none of these routines should be breaking 9.8 lmao. Not to put words in other people’s mouths but to me all of those “xyz was lowballed/robbed of a 10” are subtextually arguing that if this routine got a 9.925, and someone else did a carbon copy of it in the same rotation but had a small step on a landing and the same minor form deductions, and they get a 9.90 from the same judge too, then what the hell is that?
And if we are all silently acknowledging that the scoring operates under a practically unwritten set of rules and standards in regular practice, not tied to anything written in the code and seemingly agreed upon by consensus as to what deductions judges will pretend don’t exist and/or don’t need to be taken even if they do, then what the fuck are we doing ?
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shoolis · 1 year ago
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Father’s Delicious Meals
Father’s Delicious Meals: Room for Seconds?
Father’s Delicious Meals: Thirds, Please!
Father’s Delicious Meals: A Fourth Meal Feast!
Father’s Delicious Meals: Breakfast is Served!
Father’s Delicious Meals: Bake Sale!
Father’s Delicious Meals: School Lunch Served!
Father’s Delicious Meals: A Wake to Die For!
Father’s Delicious Meals: Generations
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isan0rt · 1 year ago
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This post makes me want to tear my fucking hair out every time I see it. I feel like an old fogey but are you fucking kidding me?? THIS is WHY the reading comprehension on this site is piss poor. TWENTY FIVE THOUSAND people apparently relate to "I don't look up unfamiliar words in the dictionary the first time I encounter them, I just guess at what they mean, and then continue just guessing at what it means and if it makes sense going forward'? Without having any sense that that's...a problem?? That that's not actually comprehension of the sentence?? I read books constantly as a kid (many of them old-timey!) and yet have literally never had the problem described in the op because I owned a goddamn dictionary and I looked unfamiliar words up in it.
Like, I understand this is not the fault of The Kids and the schools have been teaching kids to """"""read""""" (read: guess what the sentence means with no real comprehension) like Predictive AI for decades now but like. I'm just floored reading the notes in here that "haha yeah I just know it makes sense I don't know what it means" is an acceptable state of affairs for people who consider themselves well read. If you don't know what it means you're not actually understanding the sentence!! You are acting as a human chatGPT.
You understand why that's bad, right?? You understand why this causes fights on this site and the wider internet, why people attack you because they didn't comprehend a post you made?? When people are just guessing at reading and at what words mean?? Words mean things!! You can't guess the meaning of unfamiliar words and expect to understand the meaning of a complex work!! You don't need to be able to drop the dictionary definition by memory but you need to be able to at least paraphrase or rephrase what the word means.
Dictionary.com is free. You have access to the internet if you're on Tumblr. I still look up unfamiliar words now the first time I encounter them, every time, on the spot, with my magic internet device grafted to my hand at all times. If someone tells me I'm misusing a word I also look it up, on the spot, and correct myself going forward if I'm actually wrong about the meaning.
I'm not also misinterpreting the meaning of the post here, or at least the way it's being taken, because I went through the tags and it's full of people saying specifically that they don't know what a variety of common words actually mean and have never been inclined to actually find out and they think this is a relatable joke instead of a catastrophic failure of our education system.
Anyway if this is you it's not your fault but please bookmark dictionary.com and also take a listen to the podcast Sold a Story to find out how you have been completely fucked by Marie Clay and by Big Reading Recovery.
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heart-buzz · 2 years ago
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absolutely love being with a guy a full foot taller than me
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astrummorte-m · 1 year ago
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"Hustlers shootin' eight ball, throwin' darts at the wall, Feelin' damn near ten feet tall, here she comes, lord help us all Ol' T.W.'s girlfriend done slapped him out his chair Poor ole boy, it ain't his fault, it's so hard not to stare~"
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"--at that honky tonk badonkadonk~"
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heelix1r · 4 months ago
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𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 I NEED YOU SO MUCH IT HURTS … 🎥
𖤐ᝰ.ᐟ𖦹₊⊹ if they have to give up their sense of pride and lay everything on the line to show you how much they need you, then so be it.
bela is typing . . . HELLO SORRY FOR MY RANDOM BREAK FINALS SUCKS !!! wanted this needed this very much yes pls enjoy this with me 😼 i probably should do word counts too but i don’t use other media to write ,,,, SORRY JUNGWON’S IS A LIL ANGSTY
ot7 x gn!reader | drabble | romance/drama | no established au
masterlist | guidelines | requests OPEN !
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. ° ༘ 💋�� 🎸 ₊˚ෆ [ LEE HEESEUNG ]
“y/n, stop.” you never turned around as heeseung kept calling out to you. you didn’t want to. turning around meant facing him again, and you didn’t know if you were capable of it.
“y/n, stop!” you walked faster, but heeseung’s legs were faster than yours. a brisk walk turned into a jog, until you broke out into a sprint, your vision blurred as you realized you’d never be able to outrun him. this proved to be true—before you knew it, a pair of arms had enveloped you with a strong force, the momentum barreling the two of you to the ground. you hit the grass with a thump.
“just go away,” you murmured, trying to avert your gaze from him. as you scrambled to your feet, you felt a tug at your legs. reluctantly, you looked downwards. the sight before you made your breath hitch in your throat.
heeseung laid himself bare for you as he got on his knees, grasping at you as if he was begging for his life.
he was begging for you.
you felt paralyzed as he looked up at you, pathetic and desperate. “just listen to me,” he pleaded, all discretions gone. his inhibitions had finally thrown out the window as he threw himself at your feet.
“heeseung—”
“please,” he begged, bowing his head. “i need you more than anyone else i’ve ever needed in my life. i didn’t get it before, but now i do.”
he looked up at you then, his shoulders slumped, his palms facing upward on his lap. “y/n… i love you. you don’t understand how badly i need you.”
he was in complete submission of you. the thought of lee heeseung at your mercy was a thought beyond comprehension.
“get up, heeseung,” you pleaded, not wanting to maintain eye contact. you tried to push him away, at least trying to pull him up from his knees, but he wouldn’t budge.
“stop calling me that,” he cried, shaking his head. he was groveling now. “baby, please. i need you. i’ll do anything to show you. i promise, i’ll spend the rest of my life proving it to you.” his eyes were tear-stricken. “please.”
you gave him a good look, the way he threw himself at your feet as if he knew nothing better. you were silent, completely still. he was a mess at your feet, and even if you wanted to say something, you couldn’t. you were at a loss for words. this was too much to take in all at once.
“let me prove it,” he begged, staring up at you like it was all he knew how to do. “give me the chance to show you how much i need you, how i’ll put everything into showing you that i need you here with me.”
. ° ༘ 💋⋆ 🎸 ₊˚ෆ [ PARK JONGSEONG ]
“what is it going to take for me to prove it to you?” jay yelled at you from across the way. “what do i have to do, huh? what do you need from me to show you that i’m serious?”
“just forget it, jay.” you gritted your teeth and turned away from him, your back facing away. “just go.”
“no. no!” his voice was clear. “i’m not going anywhere! i’m going to stay here, and i’m going to make you listen to me! i’m being serious about this!” he reached out to you, grabbing your shoulder with one hand and spinning you back towards him in one fell swoop.
you narrowed your eyes at him. “so you’re serious now, huh?” you asked facetiously. your tone held traces of mockery. “don’t make me laugh.”
“yes,” he agreed without letting you interject. “yes, i am serious. i will do anything and everything to prove this to you—right here, right now.”
“sure you will. just what could you possibly—jay? jay?” you stumbled over your words as he reached out to grab your wrist, giving you no room to fight back as he firmly placed your palm over his heart. you were frozen in place as he approached you then, breaking the distance between the two of you. “what are you—”
“do you feel that?” he interrupted you, his voice desperate, whiny. “do you feel me?”
you did. his heart beat was racing, more than you’d like to admit. the longer he stared at you, the faster it seemed to go. but no matter how fast it beat, he continued to stare at you, conveying his desperation the only way he knew how. “this is what you do to me,” he breathed out, gripping your wrist tighter. “keep it there. you drive me crazy. i need this. i need you.” when he realized you weren’t going anywhere, his facial expression softened. “i love you,” he whispered.
he had you stunned. he saw the way your jaw fell slightly ajar, and he took the opportunity to come even closer to you. his chest was inches apart from yours. “i’ll do anything to prove it,” he pleaded. “if this isn’t enough, i’ll do something that is. y/n, this is the most serious i’ve ever been in a long time. if it’s anything you can believe from me, it’s this.”
“jay, you can’t be serious,” you whispered.
he looked at you, the determination and desperation in his face clear. “yes, i am.”
. ° ༘ 💋⋆ 🎸 ₊˚ෆ [ SIM JAEYUN ]
“why do you keep doing this to me?” jake called out to you, his voice wild with frustration. “stop pushing me away! stop doing this!”
“just leave me alone,” you screamed back at him. but no matter how far you moved, he followed suit. “i don’t want you here. leave me alone.”
“you’re lying to yourself and you know it!” he argued, now beating your pace with a jog. before long, he caught up to your pace, taking your hands within his own. “y/n, i don’t understand. help me understand. i’m right here, for you. don’t you get it?”
“can you just let go?” you thrashed in his grip, trying to throw his hands from yours, but to no avail. “i told you, i don’t want you here, you don’t need to follow me, you don’t need to do anything of this. just leave already!”
“no!” he yelled in retaliation, his eyes widened with panic. “do you not get it? do you really not understand?”
“no,” you spat at him, “i don’t.”
then, in one swift motion, jake had his hands gripped to your hips, almost slamming your body against his. you yelped at the close proximity, but his eyes never wavered from yours.
“y/n,” he whispered, his voice breathy. “i’m yours.”
you didn’t answer, his shock confession processing in your mind. noticing the way you slowly loosened your tense body, jake pressed his forehead to yours. “i am yours,” he repeated, his words pronounced. “undeniably, i belong to you. you are all i think about, you are in my dreams, you haunt me, and i invite it. i want all of it. i want all of you.”
“jake…” your attempts to escape his hold were futile—but you weren’t really trying your best, anyway. your voice faded as he traced your bottom lip with his thumb.
“i don’t care if you’ve got some baggage,” he continued, desperation creeping into his voice. “i don’t care if you have demons to fight, i want you. you, your baggage, your demons, i’ll fight them all for you if i have to. i’ll prove it to you. i’ll do anything for you. you say jump, i say how high.”
you swallowed a lump in your throat, completely in submission to his embrace, and he explored your expression, your eyes, your face.
“do you get it now?” he asks, his voice softer. “i love you.”
. ° ༘ 💋⋆ 🎸 ₊˚ෆ [ PARK SUNGHOON ]
“y/n, don’t make me do this!” sunghoon’s fading voice amidst the crowd was your only solace in your attempt to distance yourself from him. “please! just come back!”
“go to hell, sunghoon,” you spat at him, hearing the way people jostled and chastised him for rudely tossing them aside to reach you. but you didn’t turn to witness it for yourself. “i don’t want you here.”
“no,” he yelled at you, across the distance, amidst the people. he knew he couldn’t reach you. there were far too many people in this rush hour, and he’d lose the energy to push against them to make it to you. “i’m not going anywhere, i’m going to follow you until you turn around and let me say my piece!”
“what is there to say?” you asked, venom in your tone. “you don’t like saying anything, so don’t make me laugh.”
he grimaced at your words, because he knew you were right. but that had to change. right now, or else he was going to lose his chance forever.
“i have plenty to say, y/n,” he urged, pushing against yet another wave of unsuspecting strangers, all of whom shot him dirty glares. but he didn’t care—not in this moment. the way people thought of him didn’t matter, when losing you was in the balance.
“yeah, right.” you laughed, but there was no humor. you continued to storm away.
“i love you!”
his words made you stop in your tracks. despite every nerve in your body telling you this was a bad idea, you turned around, facing him from across the crowd.
“what?” you asked him.
“i need you,” he cried out. as more strangers realized what he was doing, they stepped to the side to give him some space to squeeze his way towards you. “i said it. i know i’m not the best with words, that a lot of the time i’m lacking, but if this is what it takes for you to understand, i’ll say it a thousand—no, a million times over.”
at last, amidst the active crowd, he grab your wrist and pulled you closer to him.
“do you need me to say it again?” he asked, searching your eyes for the answer. “because i can. i will. as many times as it takes. in front of all these people.”
he cups your face gently. “i’ll tell the world if i have to, if that’s what it takes for you to believe me.”
. ° ༘ 💋⋆ 🎸 ₊˚ෆ [ KIM SUNOO ]
“seriously, if you aren’t going to actually tell me what you’re trying to say, then stop making me think you’re going to.”
you huffed at sunoo, who had stumbled over his words once more. he scrunched his face in frustration, playing with his fingers as he followed you while you were walking away.
“hold on,” he cried, the frustration visible on his face. “please—just give me a second. i… i just don’t know what to say.”
“you’ve been saying that for months, sunoo. months.” you shook your head in disbelief at his words. “you keep stringing me along, wanting to tell me things, then you chicken out, and then you act like it never happened when i ask you about it. i don’t want to feel stupid anymore, because this isn’t fair.” you sped up your walking face, almost causing him to trip when he tried to keep up.
“i know, and i’ve been really mean for that,” he admitted, the anguish clear on his face. “but really, y/n, if we can just stop and you can just listen to me, i promise i’ll find the right words for you—”
“i’ve been trying to listen to you this whole time,” you snapped at him. “you’re the one who just won’t talk.”
“i’m going to!” he exclaimed, taking a deep breath as he quickened his pace. “please, just stop!”
“you’re so confusing, sunoo.” your voice twinged with hurt. “why would i believe you now?”
“because now i have the words to tell you that i love you!”
you stopped walking. as if time moved in slow motion, you turned, only to see sunoo bowing deeply for you. his eyes were squeezed tight, his hands were shaking. your breath was caught in your throat.
“what?” you asked, barely a whisper.
sunoo slowly looked up to you, and your eyes widened as you noticed his had begun to well up with tears. “i’m sorry,” he cried, approaching you and grasping your wrist. you didn’t move away from him. “every time i thought i had the confidence to tell you, i’d get scared you’d say no. that i would do something to mess everything up. and then i’d lose you.”
“and then i realized that by not telling you, i’d lose you even faster.” he gently squeezed his hand against yours. “and now, i’m realizing now that i’d rather tell you how i feel and make myself look stupid, no matter how i have to say it, than to lose you from my own cowardice.”
you couldn’t believe your ears. “sunoo…”
“i won’t be a coward, not anymore.” he swallows a nervous lump growing in his throat, shaking away any lingering anxiety he had left. “i adore you too much to ever hide away from you again.”
. ° ༘ 💋⋆ 🎸 ₊˚ෆ [ YANG JUNGWON ]
“y/n, you need to understand!” jungwon was desperately trying to get you to listen to him, but you were too busy grabbing your things, your contempt for him loud and clear. “this is necessary, what i’m doing is for us! can you please look at me? i’m really trying!”
“i’m trying, jungwon,” you hissed at him, throwing shirts into your bag without bothering to sort them out. “i really have tried to. but i feel alone. and i’ve tried to talk to you so many times, but no matter what, that’s the only thing i ever hear from you. that it’s necessary and that it’s for us.” you’re nearly in tears thinking about it, but you don’t want to look at him. “but what about me? i don’t know what your bigger picture is, because you’re always so focused on working towards something necessary, when all i’ve ever wanted is just the present time.”
your words ring deathly in jungwon’s ears, and his body feels crushed with the weight of it all. he’s rendered speechless, as you finish packing your things. you take his silence as him giving up, and you feel a pang of hurt in your chest, that he didn’t try any harder.
no matter. you were on your way out, anyway.
without another word, you slung your bag over your shoulder, your eyes glued to the floor as you made your way to the front door.
to your surprise, you heard jungwon’s feet scrambling past you, and by the time you reach the door, he’s already there, his back pressed towards it, keeping it close. he kept himself there to keep you from leaving. you saw the way the color escaped his face, begging you to reconsider your choices.
“y/n, please, don’t do this. just let me make things right with you.” jungwon planted his feet in a way that kept him rigid against the door, but the desperation on his face told you that if you really wanted to, you could push him aside. “i was so focused on the bigger picture i didn’t realize i should’ve focused on the special details in front of me.” he reached out to you, “i see that, and i don’t want to ever make that mistake again. i didn’t mean to hurt you, i’m so sorry. please, y/n, let me make this right.”
you gritted your teeth, trying to keep your composure. but jungwon’s sincerity was something you couldn’t ignore. “jungwon, why now? why does it have to be now?”
“i…” his voice falters. “i don’t… i don’t want to give you a stupid reason. or a lame excuse. i just… i thought i was doing the best thing for you. but the best thing was always to just appreciate having you here with me.”
when you don’t respond, he slumps to his knees in front of you. before you know it, he’s bowing for you to the floor, his hands curled into tight fists. he’s shaking.
“y/n,” he begs again, “please, i know i was too in my head to realize how much you needed me. but i need you. everything i’ve been doing is because i love you. and i’ll do anything to reassure you, to make sure that you never have to doubt me ever again.” his voice is muffled against the floor, but his words are crystal clear to you.
you dropped your bag and knelt beside him, nudging him. “stop bowing,” you murmured, your lips pressed together. “just get up. please.”
he peers at you, slowly getting up from his bowing position. without warning, he envelops his arms around you. “please believe me,” he whispers, “i’ve never been so sure about anything in my life. i need you here, with me. and i’ll be here for you, i promise.”
. ° ༘ 💋⋆ 🎸 ₊˚ෆ [ NISHIMURA RIKI ]
“you can stop pretending now,” you whispered, a clear hurt in your voice. “i’m sorry.”
riki was in a state of distress as he realized you had interpreted his words the wrong way. as you turned to move away, he grasped your wrist to prevent you from going any further. “y/n,” he breathed, shaking his head furiously. “no, you didn’t let me finish, you’re getting it all wrong.”
he was surprised at the speed you removed yourself from his hold. you were already walking away, and the farther you walked, the tighter riki’s chest constricted. he took a deep breath, realizing what it meant to chase you down. what this would mean for him.
but as he watched you fade into the distance, he cursed to himself. you were here, now. leaving, because of him.
it didn’t take him long to find his resolve. he chased you down, sprinting to catch up to you in a matter of moments.
you heard him sprinting, but you had to fight the urge to turn around to look. you didn’t know how much more you could take of this—
until he yelled out your name.
“y/n!” he called out, his breathing increased, his face flush from a mix of working up a sweat and something deeper. as you heard your name, your resolve weakened, and you turned to face him.
only for you to nearly be plowed over by riki’s forceful embrace. having to almost screech himself to a halt, he caught himself by wrapping his arms around you, nearly causing the both of you to topple over.
your face was pressed against his chest, but he wouldn’t waver. “riki, let go,” you called out to him, but he shook his head.
“i’m sick of this,” he whispered, “i’m sick and tired of running away. i’m done with this. i’m done with pretending.”
“what are you—”
one hand snaked around your waist, the other reaching forward to cup your cheek. “i need you,” he said, his voice no longer quiet. a proclamation of the truth he had been hiding from the world—no, himself—for too long. “more than i’ve ever needed anyone in my life.”
you were put in a stunned silence. riki only held you tighter, the facade of his indifference slowly slipping through the cracks. his eyebrows creased, his lip slightly quivering. “if it’s anything you’ll ever believe from me, let it be this.” he searched your eyes, to see if you harbored any doubt, any challenge to his words. “i’ve fallen so deeply in love with you, it’s suffocated me whole. and i… i’ve tried fighting it, i really have. but i can’t do that anymore, when it hurts me, and it hurts you.”
his thumb caresses your cheek. “i’ve been a fool,” he confesses, “but let me be your fool. i’ll learn, and i’ll be better. for you—for us. and i swear, i’ll make you the happiest you’ve ever been.”
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2024 © heelix1r.
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sunderwight · 4 months ago
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I think that Jayce is a bit of social chameleon actually, like he tends to "match" the vibe of whoever he is hanging out with, and that's part of the reason why every time he's with Vi things go completely haywire (part of the reason, some of it just seems to be like cosmic bad luck or something).
Because Vi is extremely direct and tries to kind of brute force stuff like a lot, and Jayce going along with that equals things like both of them trying to punch/smash shit until it's better. Vi is someone who views every problem as a nail and Jayce is like "well I guess I do have a big hammer" and it goes poorly.
But it's not just Vi! Jayce does this with basically everyone. I mean he disagrees with people, he's not facetious or a doormat or any kind of yesman. He just also kind of goes, oh, I guess we're doing X now? And then does his own thing in the tone/style of X.
Like when he's spending a lot of time around Heimerdinger, he's a lot more cautious, methodical, but also he lets his idealism run more of the show. He's very cognizant of risk, because Heimerdinger centers risk as his chief concern when he talks with Jayce about his research.
Whereas when he's spending most of his time with Viktor, the priority is innovation. Coming up new ways of utilizing and interpreting their research and data. Testing the limits of what it can do and then figuring out how to take it even further. Caution takes a definitive backseat to the countless possible applications of hextech.
Then when he's with Mel, he gets more image-conscious. How's his research going to be perceived? What will the legacy of it be? He focuses more on his role as a councilor and a social figure, less on his priorities as an inventor, because Mel's focus on hextech is its social clout and what it means for the city, and Jayce starts reflecting that (whereas his initial spiel about bringing magic to the masses seemed more of a "people in general" sense rather than a "Piltover specifically and maybe even exclusively" one).
Anyway I guess what I'm getting at is that whoever Jayce is with, he will try and match their freak. Which is why it's probably a good thing that he was on opposite ends of the narrative from Jinx, but also is contributing factor to why he and Viktor together nearly destroyed the world.
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