#commissions as I can because my savings is still not enough for a new one. 😬😬😬

[screwpinecaprice]

Frolicking among the flowers I think.

I feel like I already drew this before so hoping I didn't!

[sanctus-ingenium]

we need to talk about Inprnt.com

Following a really good post with more screenshots and evidence by @dynasoar5 i'm going to talk about my own experiences with @inprnt and why I am about to put my shop on indefinite hiatus from Monday the 14th of August.

First of all I'll say that since starting my print shop last year it has been a significant help to me financially - I was able to not worry about affording car insurance or motor tax (together commonly over a thousand euro) when I bought my first car, for example. I am immeasurably grateful to anyone who chose to buy one and I treasure all the pictures I've been sent of my prints hanging up on people's walls. Right now they are displayed in a real (if small) art exhibition in my home town.

(top right print is not from inprnt though)

They're great prints. Never had any complaints about them. But here's what's going on behind the scenes.

Earlier this year, around March or April, Inprnt sales started increasing in regularity. I'd made as much as $600 a week during previous sales when I made proper promo posts here, but with this increase in regularity, I felt that I couldn't make promo posts every single week. And then one day, I'm not sure when tbh, the sale just never ended. It just didn't stop having that "Ending soon! 15% off your order" banner at the top of the site. Right now it says "Final Hours: $5 Worldwide shipping and save up to 35% off your order!" and not even for a second do I believe in this final hours bullshit. It's been 'final hours' for weeks now. Months, even.

Why is this a problem? Well, how tf am I meant to make a promo post for a sale that is always "ending soon!!" and then never ends. One week it'll say "this weekend only!!" and then when the weekend is over, the sale banner just changes its wording and the sale doesn't end. I can't promo this, it makes me look like a liar and a skeevy salesman by association! It makes the site look like it's 1 week from crashing and burning, and the site owners are just scrabbling to suck as much money from artists as possible before they drown.

And they are sucking money from us. To peel back the curtain, Inprnt money can only be transferred to my paypal account 30 days after the sale is made, just in case the order is cancelled and refunded. This means I used to make one withdrawal every couple of months, when there was enough build-up of money to make it worthwhile. It also forbids withdrawing any sum under $50 btw. I would make a withdrawal request and then, after a 10 business day wait, it would reach my Paypal account.

Not anymore! The past few withdrawals have taken over a month to complete. They are straight up keeping my earnings from me for longer the agreed period. This was my last fulfilled withdrawal:

Note the date.

Almost two months.

And here is the latest withdrawal request that still has not been fulfilled.

It's coming up on 1 month and if the pattern continues, it could literally be November or December by the time I fully clear all sales.

So what's going to happen to my print shop? Because my art is currently being exhibited with a QR code linking to the shop, I can't close the shop this week. Instead I will close it on Monday the 14th of August, next week. That means that on the 14th of September, I can withdraw all of the remaining money without having any left over. My account balance will go to 0 and stay there. Although I'll de-list my prints I will leave my account there, because at the end of the day I don't want to leave Inprnt. It still offers the best artist margins and as I'm now unemployed after graduating, the additional support is such a load off my mind. So this is a chance to wait and see - if they improve their services, I'll happily re-open.

It's a big deal to me because selling prints is sort of my ideal life as an artist. I never had the attention span or self-discipline for commission work and I found that it left me creatively stagnant. I always want to try new things, new concepts and ideas, and being able to think "yeah, people will like this as a print" while I experiment is honestly very reassuring. And I know that in going on hiatus, it'll break a lot of "buy a print" links in my circulating posts. Oh well lmao. If you want to buy a print right now - go ahead, it might be your last opportunity. Another way to support me would be to check out my ko-fi for once-off donations or some nice sketchbooks/comics/book samples you can buy, or subscribing to my Patreon.

As of right now, Inprnt owes me $381 (the unfulfilled request submitted above for $186.60 and my current standing balance of $194.80 which takes 30 days from each transaction to clear).

[thelordfool]

Help me regain my freedom

I am *this close* to being able to afford a down payment on a car. Problem is, I can't save up for that down payment when I have the previous loan still to pay off:

Read more below for the story.

Please consider donating to a disabled queer's p*ypal, v*nmo, c*shapp, and also consider commissioning me for custom paintings (more examples here and here), character art, and more! Prices can be discussed in DM, as I'm kind of flyin by the seat of my pants right now, ignore the commission prices posted on any of the linked posts.

$0/$1500

My car got totaled a few months ago and the payment from the total loss wasn't enough to pay off the rest of the loan. I can roll an old loan into a new one, yes, but the problem with that is I am unable to save up for a new down payment. That $317.64 is just under what I get paid *in a month*. I also am enrolled in debt consolidation so I can get my credit cards paid off, which is another $200 a month. I'm living quite below my means, been taking a bus to work, but I live in a household that is incredibly abusive. i do literally all of the chores, get gaslit, misgendered, and am taking care of my roommate's children because he doesn't want to bother. getting a new car will mean I won't have to rely on using his (which literally has mold growing in it because he doesn't clean it or anything up after himself or his kids) to get to work and social functions. It would also mean I could get a second job to help supplement my hours.

[open-sketchbook]

my girlfriend is asking for where she can find your written works, she really likes the one post you made about your mindstate wandering w/r/t making porn stories and she'd love to support you & read your stories

Sure!

I write my (public) fiction on the website Sufficient Velocity, a sci-fi forum. Most of them are in the form of 'quests', interactive stories; my day job is an independent tabletop roleplaying game designer, so the two things go hand in hand.

I unfortunately am both very busy and kind of a mess mentally, so fiction gets picked up and dropped a lot, and I write less than ever these days due to the shambles that my life has become.

For my quests, the stuff I'm proudest of is...

Castles of Steel, a longrunning (though currently on hiatus) story set in an alternate world much like our own, but with radically different gender politics. It's about the first woman in the navy of a country a lot like 1910s Imperial Japan, and more generally about how state power and imperialism entangles itself with and recoups social progress.

A Splinter in your Mind, a retelling of the Matrix with new characters and reimagined twists and worldbuilding. It makes the trans subtext into trans dommetext, and I feel its some of my cleverest writing.

Suffer Not, and especially its sequel The Witch Lives. Suffer Not is a Warhammer 40,000 fic about an Inquisitor who abuses her powers to actually make people's lives better, and is the story of her slowly realizing it is not enough. The Witch Lives takes place ten years later, following the grown up psyker the Inquisitor adopted, and focuses much more on faith, history, and the little people.

The Spider-Liv Trilogy started as a silly and honestly kind of bad extreme-divergence spiderman AU, but its sequel The Amazing Arachne is, I think, genuinely really good, because it's about what happens when a superhero gets hurt and then doesn't get better.

I've managed to properly publish two pieces of writing, as in you can get them in book form, and I'm still really proud of both.

Whispers from the Deep is an adaptation of the quest that defined the setting of my roleplaying game Flying Circus. It's about a young woman who steals a plane and runs away from her abuser with her boyfriend, and then has to take up life as an aerial mercenary in a 1920s-themed post-apocalyptic fantasy world. Also, she's a fish person and her village is a Cthulhu cult!

Lieutenant Fusilier in the Farthest Reaches is a pastiche of the Richard Sharpe books by Bernard Cornwell, moving the setting from the Napoleonic Wars to a bizarre future world where sentient, cheerfully productive robots were invented in the early 19th century and promptly took all the jobs, elevating all of humanity to the gentry and then to the stars. It's about a redcoated robot soldier who uses her immortality to save up and buy a commission in the Army of Great Britain and Beyond, a position normally occupied exclusively by humans, and then facing the fallout of her decision and the life choices leading to it as her first deployment spirals out of control. It's also, sorta, a parody of Star Trek; the Galactic Concert is a mechanized, Regency-themed Federation, and the back half of the book is basically about how the problems of a world cannot be solved by an away team of well-meaning people with stun pistols.

[noxi3xe]

Unfortunate turn of events

AFAB reader x Pantalone - NSFW (Minors DNI) Synopsys: You're in a tough spot and have terrible luck with finding jobs. Whatever might happen once you apply for a job at the Northland bank?

Warnings: Smut, Porn /w plot, public sex, hair pulling, overall just a quick smut scene w some plot

Words: 3.5K

Author's note:

This is also posted on AO3 HERE!!

this is a quick fic I wrote while bored, the *smut* scene is short and awkward so I apologize, but still enjoy!!

Minors dni!!

｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ

»I— I'll fix it.. I swear!«

I beg and plead as the shop owner shoves me out the door. I was a good employee, I really was, I always tried my best and always put my everything into every shift. I slump down against the door and begin to sob. This job was barely enough to cover for monthly food rations.. and aside from food I needed to fix up my house and save up for new clothes. I was going to even look for a second job to cover all of my expenses but now I don't have anything! I do not even know what triggered that immediate reaction, I mean, firing me on the spot? After breaking a simple vase that the shop manager bought just a week ago? From what I overheard it wasn't even expensive!

I stand up slowly and make my way back home, head hung low in defeat. I wasn't sure what to do now, I mean.. I've got to find a job, sure, but that was harder done than said nowadays, especially at this time of the year. Snezhnaya was a cold country all year round but winters were especially harsh. I wonder how I'd survive this year, I mean my roof is busted, my water supply is running low due to my pipes freezing up thanks to my broken heating system and not to mention that one of my windows cracked. With no heating, cracked windows and a part missing roof my house was as cold as the outside and I was barely surviving. I wasn't sure what to do till I saw freshly hung posters in the town square as I passed.

'Looking for hire.'

They said, and I stepped closer, considering the idea without even checking for the publisher. I'm glad I did because my eyes almost jumped out of my skull. It would've been a death sentence to join the Fatui and there's no way I'd even consider taking up this job offer, even if my life depends on it. The Northland bank is looking for hire? Yeah no thanks..

I stumble along and head home, hugging myself tightly, already missing my warm.. well.. as warm as it can get, blanket.

________

I stare at the dry piece of bread and the already lukewarm coffee set before me on the table. Everyday is getting harder and I don't know if I'll have enough money to buy food for next week. I lean forward and rest my head into my palms, sighing loudly. I don't know what else to do, I cannot find a job and donations from doing community service aren't enough. It's getting colder each day and I have a feeling I'll freeze if I don't get my house fixed up. That's when I decide that enough is enough and stand up, grabbing my coat.

I step out into the cold and begin to venture downtown, ready to start my search. I couldn't continue on like this knowing I'll eventually starve without a stable income. I knew I'd have to get up and start looking this morning when I found another window cracked.

—

I shuffle through the thick snow, snow slowly falling from the sky. It's a beautiful sight, the sun rising behind the parting clouds coloring the sky a bright gray-orange-blue-ish color. It was barely 6:30 in the morning and I was already threading through the city, heading towards the commission's guild, knowing I could make a quick buck or two there. Then I'd head towards the community board in the city center at around 9 to check for any new posters. The idea was great and It worked out perfectly.. to a degree.

I stopped by The adventurers guild like I said I would, greeting Katheryne and wishing her a wonderful morning. I accepted two out of three commissions offered to me, seeing as the third involved fighting some Hilichurls and I wasn't very skilled with weapons. I barely used my Pryo vision and even that was when I needed a source of heat, having no other use for the darn thing. The other two commissions were the delivery type. Ivanka, a widow living on the outskirts of the city required a fresh batch of groceries delivered and Jasmine, a local florist required some fresh soil that needed to be picked up from the dock and delivered to her straight. The commissions didn't take long and I was done very quickly, before the clock even struck 9.

I made my way back towards the Adventurer's guild, waving towards Katheryne from a far.

»I'm back!«

I exclaim excitedly. Katheryne offers me a bright smile, opening her mouth to speak.

»Thank you for completing Today's commissions. Here is your reward.«

I grab the pouch she holds out to me and flinch due to it's weight.

»A-Ah! Thank you!«

I grin and straighten a little then look around. People were beginning to wake up, go about their day and open up shops. I turn back to Katheryne and stare at her for a second then ask.

»Do you know if anybody's offering jobs of any kind for a little income?«

She thinks for a second then nods, giving me a reassuring smile.

»Well I believe the Northland bank is still searching! Best of luck if you do choose to give it a try!«

I freeze and look around. The Northland bank? Still? It's been a week and the spot hasn't been filled yet? There's no way I'd even get the job if no other has been able to in the past week! Still I believe there's no other choice I have.. Katheryne would've mentioned it if there were any other job offers available but I doubt there is since she hasn't mentioned anything. I slowly make my way towards the plaza hoping and praying to the Tsaritsa and any Celestial force that might hear my prayers to bless me with a job that is NOT working at the Northland bank.

I round the corner, passing by the local bakery and spot a younger girl standing by the notice board, either taking something off or nailing a poster to the board, I wasn't sure. I approach her slowly before making my presence known as to not startle her.

»Hey! Morning..«

I say and she turns around to look at me then offers me a friendly smile.

»Mornin'«

I now stand next to her and look over at the board confirming my suspicions. She indeed was taking a poster off, the one for the local flower shop. I tried applying for a simple cashier job there but I was too late and the place was taken before I could even ask about the offer. I sigh, spotting the last job poster on the board and my heartbeat speeds up a bit. I groan and the lady looks over at me, worriedly.

»You alright, ma'am?«

She asks and I nod, apologizing.

»Indeed, I apologize, I'm just having terrible luck looking for a job.«

She hums, nodding.

»Good luck, hey the Northland bank seems to still have an open spot? Considered checking it out?«

»I have but I doubt it's smart to get involved with the Fatui..«

»That is true.. well best of luck!«

She wishes me a good day and I return the kind words, watching her disappear around the block. I stare at the board. Town info, news reports, missing person posters, the board was filled with crap like that yet no job offers. I snatch the Northland bank poster, ripping it off and turn towards home, deciding that perhaps this was my last chance. I'll put on my best clothes and warmest smile and hope for the best.

_____

I stand before the large doors, shuddering at the thought that if luck's on my side today there might just be a chance I'd have to pass them every day. I take a moment to collect myself then slowly push the pine doors open, taking my first step inside. The warmth hits me in the face immediately and I stop for a moment, taking in the warm air and sweet smell. The Bank smells like a bakery would and it isn't as loud as one would think. People are speaking in hushed tones and keeping to themselves, not one dares to speak up. The place is clean, and I mean clean. Even the plants look perfect!

I step up to the front desk and the secretary looks up from the papers, giving me a warm smile.

»Good afternoon! How may I help you?«

She asks in a tone so cheery I didn't think was possible.  I look around for a brief moment then back to her, forcing myself to return the gesture.

»I heard you were offering a job?«

Her cheery facade drops and she stares at me, dumbfounded. I wasn't sure whether she was about to laugh seeing as somebody like me was definitely not fit to work in a bank, or because I was ballsy enough to actually show up to the bank without hesitation and ask about the job? I mean the poster was up for a long while therefore I'm guessing nobody realllllyyy wanted to even think about taking up the offer.

»M-Ma'am?«

I stutter and freeze up when she suddenly snaps out of whatever trance she was in and her warm smile returns.

»A-Apologies..! Come with me!«

She doesn't ask for my information, for even my name nor what the job would be other than working behind a desk! She just asks me to follow after her and seeing as I hold no authority over her I do not really have the right to stop her and ask her pointless questions that have a chance of getting answered even after I follow her.

We make our way up a looped staircase onto the first floor which is connected to a balcony that overlooks the bank. Every millimeter of the bank walls is covered in golden and wooden details, gems and crystals of different kinds. Even the floor looks expensive and neatly polished. I heard that the maids get paid quite a lot and they don't have to deal with customers or any of the Fatui officials therefore I wonder how much I will get paid for doing both! I could salivate at the thought of how well I'll fix up my little house with the hard earned money but I decided to push those thoughts away seeing as there's a chance I'll jinx myself and not get the job if I think about it too hard. I focus my attention back onto the bank worker and offer her a soft smile as she opens the glass double doors for me, the ones we stopped in front of after leading me down a maze of hallways.

»One of our employers should be in right now, they'll take it over from here. Best of luck, Comrade!«

She says and turns on her heel, leaving me alone. I take a deep breath before creaking the door open slowly, dipping one foot inside the room then following with my whole body and finally the other foot. I now stand inside the room my attention immediately falling onto the circular desk in the middle of the room. Behind it sit three ladies, all facing away from each other, a slim pillar extending outward towards the ceiling stands in the very middle. Their desk looks awfully messy and they seem to be in a rush. I step over and greet the black haired one, offering her a smile although I do not get one in return.

»Make it quick please, I'm busy.«

She chews on a piece of gum rather loudly, clicking the pen impatiently. I stutter but step closer, placing my ID onto the table.

»[Last name][Name], [Age], I saw you guys were looking for a secretary and was wondering whether there was any chance it was still open. I'll be honest I have no work experience in this field and don't really know what the job of a secretary involves... b-but I learn very quickly...!«

She stares at me and sighs, shaking her head. Her demeanor went from annoyed to tired in an instant and she didn't seem so hostile anymore.

»No experience you say? Ughh... erm.. well this job requires a lot of running around and a good memory s—«

I cut her off immediately, scrambling to catch my words. She shoots me a glance but doesn't stop me.

»That's no problem, really.. ! O-Oh and I remember things quickly!«

She nods, signalling that she indeed was listening as she writes something down.

»Well you'll have to wait because we were ju—«

Just as she was about to finish speaking she gets interrupted for the second time, this time not daring to look a bit annoyed. Through one of the hallways enters..

The Regator

The doors opened by Fatui Skrimishers as they escort him into the room and he sets eyes on one of the desk workers, unfortunately exactly the one I was speaking to.

»You!«

One of the Skrimishers calls out and she yelps.

»M-Me..?«

The Skrimisher walks over, slapping a pile of reports onto her table.

»Go make a copy for each and every one of these separately, now!«

The Regator stares at us intently and she looks up at him, then at me and finally at the Skrimisher.

»But.. M-My Lord.. I was tending to this young lady, she's here for an interview..!«

His smile twists into a large grin upon hearing those words and he finally speaks, his voice silky smooth.

»Wonderful, I'll take over from here.«

He purrs and I freeze. Take over? I'll get interviewed by The Regator himself? This is a joke..

I step back towards the desk and stare at the man who takes a step closer, eyes narrowing.

»Chop, chop! I don't have all day.«

He says, his tone changing immediately. He moves past us towards the back of the room where stands an impressive set of double doors which leads to another hallway. The Regator looks over his shoulder and I jump, realizing I have to follow and not just stare! We enter another expensively decorated room which seemed to serve as a waiting room. At the very far right wall stood yet another set of doors. I wonder how many this place even has. The Skrimishers open the door for the 9th and he steps inside. I hesitate for a second but just for a second as the next moment I am standing inside of the office, doors closed behind me. I was shoved inside and didn't really have a choice.

»Well then? I sure don't have all day. Come on, sit.«

His demeanor changed immediately, his smile gone and his eyes cold, staring daggers through my form. I approach slowly and pull the cushioned chair out, cringing at the sound it makes as it scrapes against the floor. I cautiously sit down and The Regator leans back, pulling out a blank form from one of his drawers.

»Let's make this quick. I'll need a full name and age, address, previous work experience..«

He continues on but I don't really listen to him, more than what not staring at the blank form. Would my picture go there? Why do they need so much information? What would happen if I just refused and got out of here. He snaps me out of my thoughts as he clears his throat.

»Are you still with me?«

He's becoming irritated.

»My apologies, My Lord.«

»Ah so you can speak after all.«

He grins, sliding me the sheet.

»Make sure to be quick, we'll have to interview you properly.«

I nod and swallow nervously as I rake my eyes over the sheet of paper. He holds out a pen, his long slender fingers adorned with all kinds of rings and jewels. He smiles, although his smile unlike the other employees' wasn't warm and welcoming, more like threatening. I return the smile awkwardly as I take the pen, focusing back on the paper. There wasn't much to fill out except for personal information. Why would my work place need my address? My previous one sure as hell did not, so why now? Well perhaps it was to mail me the check, but still I can collect it at work!

»[Name]..«

He mumbles as he watches me write my name down. I look up immediately and he grins, waving me off.

»Is there a problem, M-My Lord..?«

»Oh don't you worry your pretty head off, nothing's wrong, continue on.«

I hum and skip through the attention notice, then finish the task I was given. I lay the pen down and look back up. He's focused on the sheet rather intently. He reaches forward, sliding it over the desk and I freeze. Oh right, he actually has to read this. His eyes scan the page and he frowns. Oh no..

»Antique shop manager? That's unfortunate.«

»I— Is there a problem...?«

»I don't think your past work experience matches what we are looking for. Quite unfortunate I must say.«

He sighs and stands up and my heart drops. Wait.. so I didn't get it? But..!

»W—Wa— My Lord! I seriously need this job I..«

I cannot believe I'm begging for a job I was at first hesitant to even apply for but at this point it is my last chance, the only means of survival.

»Oh really? Do tell me why this position should be granted to exactly you over every other person twice as experienced as you.«

As experienced as me? For fucks sake it's just some numbers! I grit my teeth and look at him, knowing I'd regret my words immediately.

»What every other person? As far as I've noticed I'm the only one applying for this job, no other was in line behind me!«

His smile falls and I freeze yet again.

»Oh?«

»I— W—«

He slams his hands onto the table and stands up, I gulp.

»You've got guts to bark out against a harbinger, I'll give you that.«

I melt into my chair as I watch him round the table, staring down at my form.

»Not only you decide to go against my word and my beliefs you as well try to demand things from me?«

»I—«

»So tell me, Gem. Why should a job as highly paying as this go to somebody lowly like you?«

»M-My Lord..«

He scoffs and stops before me, leaning against the desk just two or so feet away from me. I look up and he grins widely for what feels like the 100th time, knowing I'm afraid and won't even think about acting out again.

»W-Well.. a tree fell and some windows cracked.. I— I have been barely s-surviving...I—«

I stare at my feet, fumbling with my hands. I know there's no chance of redemption now but all I can do is pray. He hums, grabbing my face and I flinch, staring up at him in disbelief. The cold metal of his rings digs into my face and I grimace at the feeling.

»I have an idea how we could fix this mishap..«

I try to pull away but he grabs at his belt and I think I've got just the Idea.

___

He pulls at my hair, bringing my head back as I gasp for air. Tears run freely down my cheeks as I choke on his precum and my own saliva, barely catching a breath before he brings my head back down, stuffing my mouth.

»Yo-You know— haah..«

He bites at his lips before pulling my head off again.

»I usually don't do this but.. celestia.. I couldn't help myself..«

I sob as he brings me up by my collar, chasing my mouth with his own. He groans as our lips connect, moving together furiously, melting into each other. A string of saliva connects us as he pulls away, the scene is absolutely filthy.

»The way you looked up at me.. dear Tsaritsa.. haa—«

He groans as I trace my hand up his length and attempt sink back to my knees to finish what I've started but he stops me, gripping my arm before I could. I look up at him again and he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. Suddenly I'm flipped around and over his desk as he grips my hair, forcing me forward. I gasp as he grips my hips, leaning over my body.

»You know... I'm tempted to sign you up as my personal assistant right about now. You'd like that, wouldn't you?«

He says as he slowly slides pulls my pants down, slapping my ass.

»I asked you a question.«

He grips my throat and shoves me further into the table and I cry out. His cold rings making me shiver.

»Y-Yes! I would love to—«

He slaps me again, this time harder before pulling my undergarments off with such force I swear to everything I own I could have heard a rip. I can hear the grin on his face as he speaks again, fingers tracing my opening.

»I'm sure of it..«

He slides his fingers inside my heat, curling them upwards and I jolt, sobbing into my hand.

»We'll have to train you then, you said you were a fast learner? Did I hear that right?«

I simply nod but he frowns, not that I could see it, of course. He removes his fingers with a whine from my side and smacks my ass again, hard enough to leave a mark.

»I expect a proper answer whenever I ask you a question.«

»Y-Yes! Ye—ees My Lord!«

He grins again, rubbing the spot he just struck.

»Wonderful, don't you worry I'll call off my next meeting then we'll have plenty of time!« ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ

Written by DottoreEnjoyer69 on AO3

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for refusing to help my friend out financially after they got a new dog even though they need financial help often and are currently in debt?

Everyone is this story is mid to late 20s.

I have a friend in America who is on social benefits. So I know they don't have a lot of money. I'm also not rich but I earn minimum wage in my country and can afford to pitch in a little sometimes which I don't mind doing generally. I'm also not a big spender at all and I'm able to save up something every month.

In the past I've helped them with buying groceries and even gave them some so they could buy a laptop for art commissions and some games. I don't mind doing that at all. When their old dog got sick I helped out as well. Since I figure some people are going to want to know, in the last 5 years I have given maybe about 2000 dollars.

They got a new dog after the old one passed, which I get. A dog can be a good companion. I did find it a little irresponsible to get a new puppy when they at the time needed several hundred dollars for rent. I told them it might be better to wait until they where no longer in debt with their landlord before getting a new dog. They told me they understood my concern but they got the puppy for free from a friend so it would not be a big deal and they would be able to feed the puppy.

I did tell them puppies can get sick and end up costing a lot more than anticipated but they told me they were willing to take that risk and I decided to not push any further. I had given my opinion and there is not much else I can do. I did tell them not to count on my help financially especially since I had some things of my own that needed fixing and they told me they understood and not to worry.

But then a few weeks later the puppy ate their medicinal weed, which for some reason was within reach of a puppy, and had to get it's stomach pumped and stay overnight at the vet clinic for a few nights.

They came to me and asked if I could help out with the bill and how they would pay me back in part. The bill was over 4000 dollars. I told them sorry but no I can't. First of all, I don't even have that much, I'd have to take out a loan. Second, I warned them this could happen and that I would not be able to help out financially. They seemed a little pissed at that but I just thought it was because of the stress of the situation. They said they would try and get the funds elsewhere and asked me to share it around, which I did.

Unfortunately they didn't manage to get enough to pay the vet and ended up having to give the puppy to a shelter. It's a cute and calm pup so I have no doubt it will be adopted out quickly but it's still sad and I do feel for my friend. But now I'm being blamed for it. I've been getting several angry messages from mutual friends about how I'm the reason my friend lost their emotional support and how I'm the reason they are having a breakdown and suicidal thoughts.

I feel really badly for my friend but I also don't think it's fair to put the blame on me. The reaction from my online friend group makes me feel like I'm missing something that does make me the asshole.

[catladyoftheyr]

Too Sweet Ch. 4

Ch: (1) (2) (3) (5)

Harvey x Gn reader

Summary: you stumble upon Harvey leaving Caroline’s dance aerobics class and startle him. He accidentally drops his dumbbells on your foot and has to patch you up <3

Word count: 1.6

A/n: vhs because in my heart stardew is set in the 90s. Also he can lift you because his dance aerobics class is WORKING OKAY lmaooo I just thought it was cute 🥰

You woke up groggy, regretting the decision to pack light when you moved to the Valley. You missed your coffee maker. You desperately wanted to roll over, to pull the sheets back over your head and sleep for just 5 more minutes. But you knew yourself well enough that 5 minutes would turn into 20. You had animals to feed and crops to tend to. You dragged yourself out of bed and rubbed the sleep from your eyes before sliding your feet into your work shoes. Getting dressed could wait, you decided.

The summer air was muggy and you knew that sooner rather than later your clothes would start to stick and your hair would start to frizz. You let the animals out to graze and deftly avoided stepping on any chickens while you made your way over to the new barn you'd commissioned from Robin. A small calf poked her head out of the barn door and mooed. “Good morning to you too, Daisy.” You gave her a gentle pet on the head and she nuzzled back affectionately.

The barn and the calf had drained the last of your money. You’d have to sell directly to Pierre today if you wanted cash to buy any more seeds. You dressed for the day and headed back outside to assess what you could sell. You’d managed to craft some rudimentary sprinklers after finding a book full of blueprints your grandfather had left behind. It saved watering time, but you still had to harvest everything manually. You arranged a large basket full of everything you could part with before heading into town.

The bell on the door rang as you walked into the general store. Pierre greeted you as you set the large basket on the counter. “You’re selling today?”

“I need more seeds and tomorrow’s Wednesday.” It wasn’t technically a lie. You just omitted the fact that you were flat broke as well.

“Well I’m happy to help out. It’ll be great to have some fresh from the farm produce to offer.” Pierre took his time examining the goods you’d brought, carefully placing each item on the counter and punching numbers into his calculator. You made idle chit chat as the women from Caroline’s dance aerobics class began to file out into the store. You told Marnie that the calf was settling in just fine, thanked Robin again for her hard work on your barn. Emily told you what she was getting Gus for his birthday and overheard Jodi ask Caroline what she should make for dinner. You heard Pierre announce your total and you exchanged most of your meager earnings for seeds, pocketing the rest. You were turning to leave when you saw one more person enter the store from the house. Was that…. Harvey?

You rubbed your eyes thinking you might have made a mistake, but this town was small and that was definitely the local doctor standing there. He held a pair of small dumbbells, and you noticed sweatbands on his wrists and forehead. He wore a pair of small shorts and a t-shirt boasting what you assumed was his alma mater. You walked over to say hello and tapped him playfully on the shoulder. Harvey spun around, seemingly frightened by the unexpected touch. He dropped the dumbbells in surprise and you felt them land directly on your foot. You swore and jumped back, hopping on your good foot.

“I’m so sorry!” You both shouted in unison, apologizing to the other for different things. “I didn’t mean to startle you-“

“Your foot!”

“I think it’s okay really. I should head home.”

“You should let me examine it. The clinic is next door.” Harvey’s face displayed genuine concern, and you were secretly worried that your foot was broken. You relented, hoping the injury wasn’t going to impact your farm work. You turned around to head outside and winced as soon as you put pressure on the bad foot. You inhaled sharply and tried to find a way to walk. Harvey took notice of your efforts and wrapped one arm around your waist while draping one of yours across his shoulders. “Let me help you.”

You’d never been this close. You felt your face flush and hoped he wouldn’t notice. The act of chivalry seemed to come so naturally to him. You made your way to the clinic slowly, relishing the feeling of his arm on your waist. Harvey helped you through the doors of the clinic, allowing you to sit down on a bench in his waiting room. “Thank you” you whispered as you adjusted your positioning.

“It’s the least I could do. I can’t apologize enough for what happened. Now let’s take a look.” Harvey was especially gentle as he knelt in front of you; He unlaced your shoes, sliding off the sock of the injured foot. He pursed his lips as he examined you.

“I’m sorry I startled you. I just wasn’t expecting to see you today; at least not in Caroline’s group.”

“You need to stop apologizing.” Harvey fell silent for a moment, contemplating his next words. “I joined as a way to try and stay active. I’m not as young as I once was; it’s getting harder to stay In shape.” His face had a hint of flush to it as he spoke. You wouldn’t dream of saying it, but you found it incredibly endearing. You also couldn’t help but let your eyes wander. Harvey typically wore slacks and blazers. You trailed your vision down the lines of his arms and imagined running your fingers over the veins. His legs had a considerable amount of hair and you traced it as it disappeared under the hem of his shorts. His physique reminded you of someone’s dad, you could picture him wearing socks and sandals and denim shorts while he stood behind a grill.

“I think it’s nice that you’re making the decision to do what’s healthy. And all the women in that group are really nice. Caroline gives me some tea leaves from the bushes in her sunroom. You picked good friends.”

“Thank you. Can you promise me you won’t tell anyone else, though? Word spreads fast in small towns. I’m not ready for everyone to know about this.” His face flushed deeper, a clear shade of red now.

“I promise.” You extended your arm toward him and stuck out the pinky on your hand. “I pinky swear it.” Harvey chuckled and smiled at you before hooking his own pinky in yours and shaking hands.

Turning his focus back to your door he frowned as he felt around it gently. Even the soft touches hurt and you hissed quietly when he hit an especially sore spot. He prompted you through rotations and flexes before rising to his feet. “The good news is it’s not broken. But it’s bruised pretty badly. The swelling should go down significantly in a couple hours and you should be able to work on it tomorrow. But you need to stay off it for the rest of the day if you want it to heal. I’ll wrap it for you in a second, but you should probably ice and elevate it as well.”

The doctor disappeared behind the doors and you heard the sounds of drawers and cupboards opening and closing. You sighed and shook your head while you tried to stop the montage of scenes from today from replaying in your mind. Images of Harvey in athletic shorts, his smile as he linked pinkies, how his hands felt on you, and the look on his face when he saw you in Pierre’s swirled around your brain. Your daydreams were interrupted when Harvey emerged holding materials to wrap your foot. He worked deftly, the years of experience showing as he wrapped the fabric around you in record time. He let out a small sigh as he finished.

“You’re all set. However as your doctor I am strongly recommending that you don’t try to walk home on that foot yet. You could delay your recovery and risk further damage. Now as your friend, I’m proposing that you can come upstairs and watch a movie to stay off your feet.”

“I don’t think I can climb the stairs…”

“Leave it to me” Harvey leaned forward and swept you into his arms in one smooth motion, holding you bridal style. You gasped as your legs dangled in the air and giggled as he began to ascend the stairs carrying you. You leaned in closer, seizing the opportunity to press yourself against his chest. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he finagled the door to his apartment open. You breathed in deeply through your nose, trying to hold onto his scent before he set you down on his couch. He pulled his coffee table closer to the couch to allow you to rest and elevate your foot.

The doctor strode to a shelf near the tv that held an extensive collection of VHS tapes. He hummed as he browsed through the titles before selecting one. He popped the tape into the VCR. He settled onto the couch next to you, close enough that you could feel the fabric of his t-shirt against your arm. The movie was in black and white, definitely a classic. “I put in The Zuzu City Express. It’s one of my favorites” Harvey explained almost sheepishly. You hadn’t picked him as a film buff.

You tried to focus on the film, but the truth is you were exhausted from the stressful day. Harvey’s arm was draped across the back of the couch. You let your head fall onto his shoulder. He made no effort to move you, no indication that the action was unwanted. You relaxed and a yawn escaped. Your eyelids grew heavier as you tried harder to pay attention to the movie. Harvey’s arm moved to rest across the back of your neck, his hand falling on your shoulder as you drifted off.

[reikunrei]

feeling incredibly averse to posting this but i'm just gonna drop my kofi link here in case anyone wants to help me get out of my increasingly shitty situation living with my parents

more info below ig

after having given my parents nearly $100k over the last four years, i'd love to be able to actually leave. my future job situation is still up in the air (i've submitted for about a dozen positions and the only one i've heard back from and interviewed for hasn't gotten back to me yet), and i haven't been able to build up any savings because, again, i was (and still am) helping my family afford rent and bills, and probably the taxes my parents are behind on, but if i think about that, i'll get too angry. no joke, i've given my family, at the bare minimum, 85% of my income over the last 4 years. the rest of it has gone toward medical stuff and, now, my car

at this point, with the combo of my mom refusing to lower her standards and my dad's seeming refusal to hunt for a new full time job, i don't see how they won't continue to bleed me dry. my dad even has a bad habit of taking money out of my old savings account that he's a joint owner on or whatever from when i got it set up when i was 16, even when i stopped actively putting money in it, so now any time it gets its automated $1 transfer from my checking account, he'll just take that $1 without consulting me. i'm not exaggerating, even if it has $1-2 in it, it'll be gone within a week

i've even put off starting on testosterone because of this. i wanted to start it like 3 years ago, but kept putting it off because of money issues and wanting to save as much as possible. i got really close to actually starting it this year, but because of how messy everything is, i put it off again bc having one more thing on my plate, especially when my parents are already weird about me being trans, was not something i wanted to deal with

not to mention, we're still currently not living under a lease in our house that we're, as far as i'm aware, still tens of thousands of dollars behind in rent on (again, my dad refuses to disclose our financial position honestly with any of us) and it's developed many, many issues bc the landlord, even before we were behind on rent, is shit and refuses to actually fix anything. and my dad loves to just ignore things unless we beg him to do something

i'd love to be on my own (in the, much more affordable, midwest) by the end of summer. i by no means want to rely on donations and i have other avenues i'm working with to make money (i still have my current full time job, but i'm going through my old belongings and selling a lot online), but i'll take any help i can get atp because i'm truly at my wits end. i'd start doing art commissions again if i could, but doing that from 2020-2022, partially on top of my full time job, absolutely wrecked my right hand and i'm still in enough pain that i can't make it a regular activity

idk how much else there is to say. there's more i could say but... i don't really wanna air all my dirty laundry here. i'm miserable in so many ways and it's just become increasingly clear that my dad expects me to constantly cover his ass. my younger brother gives money too, but he manages to go on big cross-country and overseas trips with friends, so i think i've been stuck with the burden of giving the most money. there's so many more things going on in the world rn and everyone is stretched thin so i don't expect much, or anything, but. idk. might as well throw it out there, right?

i’ve also since taken down the gfm i set up last year when we got our first eviction notice bc, while we still need the money, i don’t feel right keeping it up for multiple reasons, including “i don’t want to give any of that money to my family” and it feels too… serious to keep it up when i could just throw out my kofi instead

i just want to make sure i have some sort of safety net to catch me if i move before anything job-wise is finalized. i need to be able to afford a place to live for at least a month so i can job-search while physically being in the area i wanna move to, which would ultimately make it easier for me to find a job at all. i'm working on being more firm with giving less money so i can actually have the means to move and be safe and comfortable, but... that never lasts long in this house

anyway. that's it, i guess. thanks for reading

[fillinforlater]

It’s that time of the year again. What are some of your favorite smuts released in 2023?

Monday of Appreciation: Part 104

Hello everyone, Smite here!

2023 is coming to a close and it's been quite the year, a mixture of "this is a bridge year for greater things to come" and "WE LIVIN' NOW MF!" What is a bit different this year is that the highs weren't as high and the lows weren't as low compared to previous years---maybe that is just me getting older, maybe it's hindsight. Either way, I'm good and this year was good.

But some things are more than just good. I'm of course talking about these writers and their stories that I have featured today. All of them deserve special mention, but I want to focus on two of them specifically.

In a year of great, fantastic and already legendary fics, these two stand out.

Without further ado, let's dive into the final MoA of this year:

-1-

@fanfiction4sooya: Can't Save You Now ft. Chaewon, Kazuha, Sakura

I- I- I just read the damn tags and new I one day had to give this a shot. ff4sooya has crazy ideas, futa galore, different dynamics and kinks, which is SO MY THING. This has Mommy and Daddy involved in an absurd (and absurdly hot) threesome that I couldn't take my eyes off.

Now I definitely need to read more and you should too because I bet there are a bunch of Masterpieces in that long Masterlist!

-2-

@iznsfw: Drunken ft. Olivia Hye

Is it really a Monday of Appreciation post without IZ?

Seriously, what this genius is able to cook up in a commission or in the currently ongoing (HYPE) IZ DAYS OF CHRISTMAS is absolutely incredible. We have long stories with in depth characters and love drama that ends not only smuttily but sweetly. Who the fuck needs books, when you can just binge IZ?

With "Drunken", they have once again hit it out of the FUCKIING park. There is never enough Daddy kink fics, yes, but mine seem like nonsensical cringe porn compared to this beauty of a piece. I love how it plays with my heart, no I'm not crying---okay, now that is hot.

Let me change that: there is three very fucking special stories today!

(I think this might even be better than Levi's Hyeju, wtf)

-3-

@cataboliac: Enkindle ft. Wendy

Firstly: I LOVE YOU CATA, BIG QT!

Secondly: "Enkindle" feels a bit like coming home, like a day in Paradise, like the one person that shines so bright in your life that you don't want it to go. And you know, that is the great thing: this might be Cata's final fic, the farewell, but not only is his life gonna be great and he'll be super happy - we also get to read this again and again, and I'm sure I will one day.

Thank you, Cata, for hanging around!

Thirdly: I'M GONNA KISS YOU, CATA!

-4-

@writerpeach: Delectation ft. Wonyoung, Yujin

1.000 Notes, and it's still not enough for what is my pick for fic of the year (FOTY? FOOTY? There is a scene like that, yep). IZ*ONE truly never dies, but it is IVE and these absolute super stars, bomb shells with flawless faces and different, yet irresistible bodies that have us in a frenzy.

Talking about frenzy, all those 30,699 words are a frenzy. I thought Peach would set it up with a long and painful tease that has us edging the entire time BUT NOPE this has so much fucking smut, so many lines of neediness and horniness, it is impossible to finish in one try or two tries or... I dunno, seven-hundred tries?

It's detailed, it's straight forward, it's sex from every fucking angle, I can never get tired of this. I will go so far and say this is Peach's magnum opus, the GOAT fic by the GOAT writer. At least for that day, I can say this without a doubt.

Peach, you are crazy and thank you for that <3

#PeachPavedTheWay #AnnyeongzForDaddy

[negans-lucille-tblr]

Go Easy | Sam Winchester Oneshot

Summary: Sam’s hiding a part of himself from his new, inexperienced girlfriend, but maybe he doesn’t have to. 

Rating: 18+ (Smut)

Tags: teasing, flirting, mentions of virginity, mentions of liking younger women, angst, mentions of BDSM, Dom/sub vibes, mild BDSM, bondage, fingering, p in v

WC: ± 2.8K A/Ns: This was commissioned by someone who would like to remain anonymous! Hope you like it!

Sam Winchester Masterlist

“So, how did you two meet again?” 

There’s a sparkle in Dean’s green eyes that Sam knows only too well means that Dean hasn’t forgotten at all, and he’s only asking the question for one reason; to tease the living fuck out of him. 

“Urm, at the college library,” Y/N replies softly, clearing her throat and offering his brother a polite smile as she reaches for her glass of wine. 

“Of course you did,” Dean chuckles, “so you’re one of these brainy young professors too?” 

“Urr…” Y/N glances nervously at him, and Sam knows it’s his turn to step in and save her. 

“No, actually, Y/N is a student,” Sam needlessly reminds his brother, unashamedly. 

The smirk instantly curls over Dean’s lips as he chuckles, shaking his head. “A student, Sammy? You’ve been working there for two months and you’re already sleeping with the students, why am I not surprised?” 

Sam’s brow instantly pulls into a frown as he shakes his head. “No, it’s not like that, De,” he protests, looking over to see Y/N is also confused by Dean’s comment. 

“What does he mean?” she asks, blinking at him. 

“Nothing,” Sam insists. “He’s just being an ass.” 

Dean continues to chuckle, reaching for his beer and taking a long swig before swallowing hard and licking his lips. “Listen, we can just address the elephant in the room, okay?” he grins, looking between them. 

“Dean, no,” Sam warns, hoping his brother will realise he is barking up the wrong tree completely right now and will back off. 

“Oh c’mon, Sammy, we shared a bedroom wall long enough for me to know what you’re into. You’re hardly shy about it. And we’re all adults here… at least…” his eyes land back on Y/N, and Sam’s jaw clenches. 

“Jesus, Dean, she’s more than legal,” Sam grunts, wishing his legs were just a few inches longer so he could kick his brother under the table. 

“Relax, I’m teasing you both,” Dean laughs easily, lounging back in his chair with his beer in hand. 

Sam glares over at his older brother for a moment, before looking across at Y/N to make sure she’s okay. She seems a little flustered, but before he can reach out to take her hand in hopes of relaxing her a little, she rises to her feet and softly excuses herself. Sam watches her leave, heading towards the bathroom, and then turns his attentions back to his brother. 

“Seriously, dude?” he huffs. “Now she probably thinks I’m some pervert.” 

“Well, from what I’ve heard–” 

“Dean, I’m serious,” Sam interrupts. 

“Oh, c’mon Sammy, you’re not exactly quiet about your… tastes,” Dean argues, smirking slightly. “I’m just saying that she’s exactly the kind of girl I thought you’d date.” 

“It’s not like that, De,” Sam protests, “not with her.” 

Dean cocks an eyebrow as if he doesn’t believe him. “So you’re telling me you’re not dating a younger woman who’s all quiet and reserved because she’s exactly the kind of girl who obeys your every command?” he mocks. 

“She’s not like that,” Sam continues to argue, and he thinks maybe Dean is finally believing him, because a small frown pulls on his brow.

“Wait… really? This isn’t one of your… kinky things?” 

“No, Dean,” Sam scoffs, still amused by Dean’s naivety even after all this time. Sam’s tried on more than one occasion to educate his brother on the lifestyle, but Dean couldn’t be further from Sam when it comes to things like this. “We’re actually dating, she’s actually my girlfriend,” he explains. “My very inexperienced girlfriend you’ve probably completely freaked out, so thanks for that.” 

“Inexperienced?” Dean blinks, but then another cheeky smile lights up his face. “Sammy, you dirty dog!” 

“Dean–” 

“Well, in my defense, dude, you don’t date much.” 

“You didn’t think it was weird I’d asked you to meet her?” Sam questions. 

“I don’t know what happens between you and these girls,” Dean protests, shrugging. He’s quiet for a moment, but then he seems to get a little more serious, playing with his beer bottle. “So, is she open to what you like, or…”

Sam can tell that it’s a genuine question, so he doesn’t roll his eyes or complain, instead he takes a deep breath and decides to answer honestly. “I doubt it, we’ve never talked about it.” 

“So you’d pack it all in for her?” he asks next. “Do you like her enough to do that?”

“Yeah, I think I would,” Sam nods honestly. 

“Well then, I’m sorry dude, didn’t mean to freak her out.” 

Sam looks towards the door leading down the hallway towards the bathroom and takes a deep breath. “I’m sure she’s fine,” he tells his brother, realising he’s only trying to convince himself more than Dean. 

Y/N has been even more quiet than usual as they clean up after dinner. With Dean now gone, Sam was hoping she’d be a little more confident, like he’d noticed her becoming in the recent weeks, but she doesn’t say much as she clears away plates and carries them out into the kitchen, placing them alongside the sink. He watches her begin to run the hot tap, filling the sink up with warm, soapy water, and leans in the doorway just observing for a moment or two, wondering how he’s going to approach this. 

“Hey, let me do that, it’s my place,” he protests, walking up behind her and wrapping his arms around her middle. 

“It’s fine,” she insists softly. Sam places a soft kiss to the back of her head, and he watches as her movements slow and she clears her throat. “Sam, what did your brother mean when he said he’s not surprised that I’m a student?” 

“Nothing,” Sam half lies. “He was just being an older brother and trying to embarrass me.” 

“So you’ve not been with other students?” she checks, turning herself around and stepping out of his embrace to face him. 

“No, not since I was a student myself,” he tells her honestly this time. 

“Students your own age?” she asks next, almost challengingly. 

“Pretty much,” he nods. “Y/N, I’m not into young girls or anything,” he laughs awkwardly. “There’s not even ten years between us, it’s not about that for me. Look… can we just forget the whole dinner, please?” he pleads, already exasperated. 

She’s been spooked enough for one night, she doesn’t need to hear all about Sam’s twisted, kinky fetishes too. He’s kept those a secret for a reason. He didn’t know it when he first started dating her, but Y/N had been a virgin before they met, and he could still count on one hand how many times they’ve had sex. If he was ever going to show her that side of him, it wouldn’t be now. 

“So you’re not into young virgin girls?” she asks bluntly, blinking at him. 

“No, absolutely not,” Sam protests immediately, the very implication making his skin crawl. “Firstly, I didn’t even know you were a virgin when we met. Secondly, you’re twenty two, you’re not even a teenager anymore–” 

“Okay,” Y/N interrupts. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to accuse you of being a perv or anything, I just… when Dean said he knows what you’re into…” 

“He didn’t mean that,” Sam tries to explain. 

“Then what did he mean?” she presses, blinking at him again. 

Sam sighs heavily, not sure he can answer that honestly if he wants to keep her in the dark about his fantasies and desires. 

“Is it bad? Is that why you won’t tell me?” she implores. 

“No, it’s not bad,” he argues weakly, shaking his head. “I just don’t wanna freak you out, I know you’re new to all this.” 

“Maybe physically, but one of the perks to being late in the game means I’ve done a lot of research,” Y/N admits coyly. “So I’m not as naive as you think.” Sam’s eyebrows rise at her implication. “Just tell me, Sam, please?” she begs softly, a lot more seriously than before. 

Sam huffs a breath and licks his lips for a second, gathering his thoughts. 

“Usually, I like a certain… dynamic in the bedroom,” he tries to explain briefly. “But, I would never expect that from you, so I’ve never brought it up. I’m fine with the way things are between us,” he rushes to add for reassurance. 

“What kind of dynamic?” Y/N asks, seeming to ignore the second half of his comment. 

“Urm… me in charge… in control… y’know, pain for pleasure kind of thing,” he admits, feeling his cheeks heating up at his admission. Normally he’s a lot more sure of  himself, oozing confidence as he explains exactly how he expects it to go down between him and the girl he’s about to fuck. But Y/N is different, and he doesn’t want her running for the hills because of this. 

“So BDSM stuff?” she clarifies, biting her bottom lip. 

“Yeah, that stuff,” he nods. “So are you freaked out?” he asks, unable to stop himself. 

Y/N doesn’t answer at first, she just stares at him and swallows hard, and Sam’s pretty sure she’s about to break up with him, leave and never come back. But what actually happens takes him off guard, as his eyes follow her as she drops to her knees at his feet and settles into a kneeling position, looking up at him through her lashes. 

“What… What are you doing?” he stammers out, afraid that maybe she feels like she has to do this for him. 

“Something like this?” she checks. 

“You don’t have to–” 

“You don’t think I don’t know exactly what you want… Sir?” she asks softly, a tiny smirk beginning to spread over her lips. 

Instantly Sam’s cock begins to harden behind his jeans. It’s been a while since he’s seen a girl on her knees at his feet, and while he hears people call him Sir a lot thanks to his job, it feels so different hearing it come from her lips in that tone. 

“A-are you sure?” Sam checks sincerely for a moment. 

She doesn’t reply to begin with, she just reaches out, softly running her hand up his leg, over his thigh and towards the now obvious bulge in his pants. 

“Like I said, I’ve done my research, I know what I like the look of,” she explains, her hand now cupping his cock through the denim, making Sam’s head a little foggier. “I wanna know if it’s as good as it looks, I want you to teach me,” she purrs, blinking at him seductively. “Just go easy on me?” 

Sam reaches forward, cupping the side of her face. “I’ve got you, baby girl,” he confirms, feeling her lean into his touch. “I’ll guide you through it.” 

Your POV

Holy fuck. 

Sam’s teeth drag down your throat, his large hands finally releasing your wrists above your head, smoothing down your arms. 

“Leave them there,” he growls against your skin, his hands now finding your breasts, fondling them for a moment or two before reaching around your waist, pulling you closer to him. You moan, arching your back into him, your hands finding his long hair so you can card your fingers through it. “I said, leave them there,” Sam growls, instantly pinning your hands above your head once more. “Don’t make me tie them up.” 

Just the very thought of him tying you to the bed, making you completely at his mercy makes your insides flutter with even more arousal that pools between your bare legs. 

“Please do,” you find yourself gasping, your brain foggy with arousal and desperation. 

“You’d like that, hm?” he smirks, leaning back to look at you. “You’d like me tying you up, using you however I want?” You instantly nod, desperate for just that. “Use your words, baby girl… always use your words with me,” he commands. 

“Y-yes I want that,” you confirm verbally. 

“Sir,” he adds for you. 

“Sir,” you also add, breathlessly. You’d always liked the idea of calling a guy Sir in the bedroom, but you never thought it would be this much of a turn on.

You watch him climb off of you, now standing at the foot of his bed as he reaches down for his jeans on the floor, and without taking his eyes off of you, he grabs the belt still in the loops and pulls it free. The sight is near enough orgasmic as you once again arch your back and moan, desperate for some attention between your legs. 

Sam uses the tail of his belt to trail up your body, leaving goosebumps in its wake as you squirm underneath him. 

“Maybe one day we can use this for something a little more entertaining,” he ponders, a wicked smirk curling over his lips. “But for now, we can make good use of it in other ways.” 

You feel him wrap the leather around both your wrists, and with only a few tugs, you find yourself bound to the headboard, unable to move your hands very far; unable to touch him anymore. And suddenly, you want nothing more. His cock is hard and practically dripping with precum on your thigh, and you want to wrap your hand around it, to give him some relief. But he seems unfazed by the lack of attention it’s receiving, instead focused on your body, and the way it’s writhing underneath him. 

His hazel eyes scan over what feels like every single inch, and he hums in appreciation, his hands beginning to ghost over your skin. When his touch begins to trail lower than your belly button, you find your legs widening as if to encourage him between them. He seems to oblige without any further teasing, which you’re grateful for, because you’re not sure how much longer you can take this. Your head feels like it’s going to explode. Being at someone’s mercy is so much better than it had been in your head all those times you’d gotten yourself off to the fantasy, or touched yourself to those videos you used to be so ashamed about liking. 

“Someone’s wet,” he notes, a smug grin on his lips at the fact. “You’re enjoying this aren’t you?” 

You nod desperately, bucking your hips against his fingers, feeling him rub your clit as you begin to moan. 

“Yes, Sir,” you rush to confirm, just about mustering enough sanity to remember to use your words like he’d commanded. 

“If you like this, wait until I train you to be the perfect little slut for me,” he growls, and you gasp for air as his fingers push inside you with his words, your head spinning with the mixture of the sensation and the very thought of his words. “This body is perfect, and it’s all mine, isn’t it?” he asks, his eyes landing on yours. 

“All yours, Sir,” you confirm, breathlessly. “Please… please fuck me,” you find yourself begging, unable to take much more. You just want to feel him inside you; it’s a feeling you’ve grown to love, and you only wish you’d have met him sooner. 

“That’s not how you beg,” Sam growls, curling his fingers and making you cry out in pleasure. “Ask nicely, or I won’t fuck you at all.” 

“Please, Sir. Please will you fuck me? I need you to fuck me, please.” 

“That’s better,” Sam hums, removing his fingers and stroking his cock, slicking it with your juices from his fingers. “Such a good girl, I can tell you’re going to do so well,” he praises. 

He leans over you, teasing the tip of his cock through your arousal, softly pressing against your opening as he chuckles at your desperation. You buck your hips in hopes that he’ll slide deeper, but he holds back, smirking almost evilly down at you, clearly relishing in just what he’s driven you to. 

“Please, Sir,” you beg one last time, barely audible through your gasps for breath. 

Sam leans down, bringing his mouth close to your ear, his cock still only just inside you. “I love the way that sounds on your lips,” he breathes out, his cock throbbing as if to prove his point. “I can’t wait to show you exactly how I like it.” And just the thought of this getting even better, has you on the edge.

[tgmsunmontue]

Online & Anonymous 1/16

Hangster. Explicit. (2.5k chapter) Years before they meet in person Bradley and Jake strike up a friends-with-benefits relationship online. And then something more like an actual relationship.

A predominantly epistolary fic set in a world where papers were pulled and events of TGM will take place and DADT exists until it is repealed at the end of 2011.

The website they begin chatting on is called 'Jake', which was a site that existed back in the early 2000s. (It was too good an opportunity to miss).

Odd year = Bradely's POV and Even year = Jake's POV

>>Bradley chatting (bold and italics)

>>Jake chatting (italics)

Many thanks to @celandinebergerac, @phisworld14, @redfurrycat and @nevergettingoverit for being my sounding boards as I hashed this out.

2005 – Bradley

                Bradley refuses to be grateful about his years at college. Going the ROTC route has meant he’s likely had a wider exposure to certain elements than if he’d gone to USNA but he still doesn’t understand why Pete pulled his papers, or why Tom let him, but they’re his past now. He has a new family, his fellow classmates and the online message boards he found when he was exploring. He’s got them in his corner no matter where he goes in the world now, his own private little cheering squad. Of course he’s been lonely in the holidays, but he’s made do. Usually working to earn money to see him through the next semester.

                One thing he has saved and scrimped for is a laptop. A personal laptop that he can use to keep in touch with his friends he made online and at college. Yes he could of course use the communal computer labs, and he will need to do that to actually get closer to the WiFi signal, however he doesn’t have to use a communal machine, which makes him more comfortable considering what he often uses his machine for. He’s aware of what he says and does could be used against him, but he’s aware now that he could do something else with his life if he had to. Not that he wants to, but he will if he has to.

                And it’s all been worth it. He’s made it, he’s at flight school, is a commissioned officer in the US Navy and now he just needs to be the best. He knows he’s good, flight school is highly competitive and the fact that he’s here is enough of a confidence boost that he’s actually good enough, no matter what Pete or Tom think. That it didn’t take anyone’s name to get him here. He settles into the orientation session, listening intently, taking notes, and looking around at the rest of the class. He recognizes a few faces, but most are simply a haze, although he knows that will change soon enough. A break comes and the woman beside him turns to him.

                “Hi, Natasha Trace.”

                “Bradley Bradshaw, nice to meet you.”

                “Is that actually your name?”

                “Yep,” Bradley sighs, resigned to going through the whole thing with another group of people.

                “Ouch. My condolences.”

                Bradley laughs, pretty sure he’s going to like her.

2006 – Jake

                Jake stares at the name of the site and he’s pretty sure he could use Jake as his username, and no one would believe that it’s actually his name. And he’s not actually going to use his whole first name, he remembers a few details about staying safe online. He creates an account, his hands shaking a little because he’s not ever gone looking for anything like this before, not online. Not where he might get found out.

>>Okay, if that’s the year of your birth you need to change your username. That’s not a smart thing to put on here.

                Jake stares at the message, then at his username. It needed to be eight characters or less and something he’d remember. Of course he’d gone with his initials and the year he was born. Of course that maybe wasn’t the smartest thing in the world in hindsight, but he’s new to this. What this PeteF14 thinks he knows isn’t much, because he’s fucking using a first name and the name of a fighter jet. It couldn’t be more obvious. Well, maybe he’s just a fan of fighter jets?

>>What’s wrong with JAS1986?

>>And you’re using your first name, that’s not smart either.

>>Pete is definitely not my first name. It’s not even part of my name. I hate the name Pete.

>>Oh my god, why did I use the name Pete?

>>I don’t know, you tell me.

>>Just someone from my past I’d rather forget. How about you call me Nick instead? Actually.

>>PeteF14 has changed their username to NickNick

>>Again not your name huh?

>>Nope. But it is a family name somewhere in the line of my ancestors.

                Jake snorts, because that could be father, uncle, grandparents. Hell, it could even be part of a last name, which he guesses is actually pretty smart as names go, for it to be something so generic.

>>You need to make a new username though. There are some dodgy people online.

>>But not you right?

>>I can be plenty dodgy if the circumstances require it, but just doing my civic duty. Change your username kid.

                Fucking fine. He doesn’t want to be kept calling kid by strangers on the internet. This isn’t why he signed up to this account.

>>JAS1986 has changed their username to JASTexas

>>No! Don’t put where you’re from. Or where you live. Fucking hell. Is this your first time or something?

>>Yes, if you must know.

>>What would you suggest? Considering your name was something you apparently hated and is now NickNick, which is ridiculous by the way, double-barrel names like that sound stupid.

>>This isn’t why I signed up to this site. And Texas is a fucking huge state, and even if I did still live there, it’s not where I live now.

>>Sorry. How about TJASX, or 00Austin, JASUSA maybe?

>>You suck at coming up with usernames.

>> JASTexas has changed their username to 00JASTYX

>>Hmm. Yeah. Better.

>>So glad to have your approval.

>>I can’t tell if you’re being a dick, or if you actually want my approval. Because I do like that you listened to me. If that’s something you’re into.

>>I don’t know what I’m into. First time remember?

>>First time online right?

>>No. Not just online.

                He pushes the laptop away from himself, suddenly mortified that he’s admitted that to someone. Not that it matters, not that he just can’t outright lie about it, and he shouldn’t care so much, but… well. He does. He doesn’t like not knowing, not having that life experience. Not that he can just go out and get it, hence… this.

>>You ever slept with a guy?

>>Yep. I got the whole college experience under my belt.

>>I’m jealous. None of that where I went. And not really easy now either.

>>You ever had cybersex? I can tell you what to do to yourself. Might get you off.

                Jake’s pretty sure there isn’t any might about it, is already getting hard just thinking about it, just having this tenuous connection with someone, anyone, that might in fact be like him. Fuck. He has no idea if this Pete-hating Nick guy is even a guy, or how old he is, or even where he is in the world. It’s all sorts of freeing actually, this level of anonymity that despite the fact that Nick knows he considers Texas home and is born in 1986 there is nothing else about him that can be used to identify him.

>>No, but I am very open to new experiences. You want to tell me what to do huh?

>>No, I think this time I want to tell you what I want to do to you.

>>You can touch yourself however you like.

>>Trust me, you can just read. Multi-tasking takes a while to figure out.

                Jake snorts, but Nick probably, no, definitely, has more experience than Jake in all things sex-related and if all he has to do is read words on his screen then he can manage that. Although he’s going to practice, wants to be able to jerk off and type at the same time, get good at doing it one-handed. Wants to be able to reciprocate in the future.

>>Your first time, I’d kiss you, slowly and softly to start with, and I’d hold your body close, because I want to feel it against mine, solid and warm. I’d slip a hand between our bodies, run my fingers up the length of your cock, feel how warm it is, how heavy… 

>>God I love the feeling of a cock in my hand, knowing how much pleasure it can bring.

>>We’re still fully clothed, I want to enjoy undressing you. I’m not touching your cock to get you hard, more giving you a promise of what’s to come.

                Jake’s mouth is dry, his entire body tingles at the images and ideas this is creating. These words are meant for him, and him alone and he runs his fingers down his body in a ghosting imitation of what it might feel like to finally have someone else’s hands on him. This is exactly what he was looking for when he made the account, something real but also not too risky. A little risky though, but it’s not heading out to the nearest gay bar.

>>I’m pulling your shirt out of your pants, getting my hands onto your skin, just touching for a little before I go back and undo the buttons and push your shirt off your shoulders.

                Jake groans, part of him impressed that his guy has somehow picked exactly what kind of shirt Jake is wearing, and he pulls it off, along with his singlet top, lets his hand stroke over his skin and is a little surprised at the responding shiver his body makes. He likes this even more than he thought he would. He shoves off his pants, not wanting to wait until Nick tells him he’s taking them off.

>>You’re enjoying it, enjoying my hands on you, warm fingers just tracing over your skin, making you feel desirable. I’m still kissing you, still pretty softly, I don’t want to spook you, not this first time. I run my hand down your body again and I find your cock. It’s gotten harder, pressing against the front of your pants and I can feel how thick you are. I want a closer look. A taste.

>>I kiss down your neck, along your jaw, suck at your nipples a little until I’m on my knees in front of you.

                Jake groans, imagines some guy wanting to do this with him, to him, for him. He reaches for his lube, glad he doesn’t have to try and type, squeezes a little out, he doesn’t like it too slick, grips his cock and strokes, tries to imagine what a hot mouth would feel like sucking him down.

>>I know it will be warm, I’ll inhale through my nose, learning what you smell like. I’ll exhale through my mouth, pressing it to your cock so you feel the warmth of my breath through your pants around your most sensitive skin.

>>I undo the button of your pants, carefully lower the zipper, and then pull them down, tugging your underwear down carefully as well. Then I can finally taste, get my tongue on you, let my fingers dig into the muscles of your thighs and bring you closer to me.

>>I am not in any type of rush, I love giving blowjobs, gets me off, having a guy trust me this much. Just let my face rest there and breathe for a few seconds before I lick up your length, one of my hands coming to fondle your balls. Some guys love having their balls sucked, I wonder whether you will?

                Jake bites his lip, his hand stroking harder and faster, wonders when he’ll get to find out, god he wants to find out. If this is how good the written word is he really wants to find someone he can try these things with in-person. He might have to wait a couple of years still, but fuck it’ll be worth it. God it better be worth it.

>>I lick at the head of your cock, place a light kiss and then I lick and purse my lips, making a warm slippery heat for you to press into and then I suck you into my mouth and all you can feel is sudden tight heat around your cock. I’ve moved my hand to the bottom of the shaft, stroking you there but I’m sucking the head and top half of your cock with the sole intent that I want you to come in my mouth.

                Jake whines, his hips jerking as he imagines coming in someone’s mouth, having someone wanting him to come in their mouth. For it to be sexy rather than dirty or forbidden. That idea, that he will one day get to be sexy, that he will have someone that is his, that wants to be with him, is what has him coming, his breath coming in rough pants, loud in the quiet of his room, all the tenseness in his muscles suddenly turning into hot liquid as he comes and he groans.

>>I reach for one of your hands, get you to run your hand through my hair, encourage you to pull a little as I suck you harder and faster. I want to make you noisy, want to hear your pleasure when you come. Want you to come.

                Jake quickly wipes himself clean, the tissues by his head there pretty much there solely for this purpose and he wants to go and wash his hands before typing but he types one thing before sprinting to the little bathroom and washing his hands as quickly as possible before running back to his bed and laptop.

>>Wow.

>>Mmm. I’ll take that as a compliment.

>>I hope that was an okay first time.

>>You know where to find me if you want to.

                Jake shivers, re-reads the words, because first time implies there will be more and he can only imagine the things he might get to share.

>>Thanks.

>>That was really something.

>>Was good. Amazing.

>>I enjoyed it.

>>A lot.

                Oh god, he’s babbling through the internet and the guy is probably laughing at him.

>>Good. I’m glad. Can’t vouch for your first time in real life, but at least you can always hit me up if you find the real thing lacking.

>>Actually the real thing can take some practice and experience to get right, so don’t just go with the first guy who shows interest okay? Learn from my mistakes at least.

>>Your first time wasn’t good?

>>Nope. Got better of course. Eventually. But I had years at college to figure things out. Now I’m not at college, but I’m still figuring things out. Young yet though. Got time. Not as young as you though.

>>Haha. I’m legal.

>>Yeah well, I’ll have to take your word for that.

                He signs off, feeling a little awkward and he wonders how awkward it would be if it was face-to-face. Yeah, he’s really not ready for that yet.

                The awkwardness fades though, and he chats with Nick almost weekly. They definitely get better at the sex talk, and Jake becomes adept at one-handed typing. They also talk about other stuff, and Jake can feel like he can ask him anything, be open with his worries about his career, without going into detail about what that career is exactly. Nick is non-judgemental, answers all his sex questions and when he goes looking to verify some of the answers he finds that the information he’s getting is solid. Correct. It makes him trust him. Probably more than is wise, but he doesn’t share any further information that could identify him. The risks are too high and Nick hasn’t offered up anything either.

                Then Nick says he’s going to be online less regularly, maybe not online at all, potentially for five to seven months and Jake is surprised at how disappointed he feels. Somehow, with the sex and the talking and the fact that he’s been able to be so open with Nick about being gay makes Nick feel like his best friend. He has other friends, but none of them know he’s gay. He’s far too scared to tell them.

                Maybe one day.

2007 - Bradley - Chapter 2

[semper-draca]

There's something so depressing about being an artist on tumblr these days that I'm finding hard to articulate. Years ago, shitty one-hour sketches I posted would at least get double digits in the notes. These days, I can post commissions that took over fifty hours and get 5 notes at most. Blah blah do art for yourself, sure, but the important part is -

I Rarely Get Commissions Anymore.

Where I used to have to limit how many comms I could accept at once because I'd get that many requests, now I'm lucky to get two when I open up coms again. People don't reblog the art I do for myself, so no one finds my commission info that way. People don't reblog the art I do for commissions, so no one finds my commission info that way. People don't reblog commissions posts. A couple likes will get tossed at it from people who don't actually reach out in interest, so it doesn't circulate and it's just me reblogging it into the void, desperately hoping for some modicum of cash. I feel like people don't understand these days how little money most artists are bringing in, and the anxiety that comes with drastically declining circulation of art on websites like tumblr. Right now, for example, I'm desperate to earn as much money as I can during the summer because what I earn this summer? Has to last me rent for seven months straight to help offset the inevitable drain of all the savings I have. Normally some of that would come from art - nowadays, I can't rely on getting even a single commission.

I think this anxiety and this real material concern is what is behind all those "please for the love of god reblog art/posts you like" posts that people love to get angry about. If you haven't been here for years, it can be hard to see the ways in which this vanishing reblog culture has severely hit artists and forced many away from this platform. I don't want to leave tumblr or stop posting my art here, but good god is it depressing to see this site, and I cannot stress this enough, almost COMPLETELY VANISH as a revenue stream. I don't know what the solution to this culture shift is, but I do know that it's causing this site to deteriorate and forcing artists to move elsewhere and invest less effort on tumblr because it no longer makes any financial sense. I know that everyone is tired of hearing this, and fair enough, because there are plenty of other artists with louder voices than mine saying similar things, but please, if you like some art, consider reblogging it. Even if you have no interest in ever commissioning that artist. Others might see it and be interested, and that's how most new clients are made. Artists have rent on the line.

anyway, if you've made it to the end of this rant and haven't blocked me for it lmao, I still have commissions open

[satancopilotsmytardis]

Welcome to the Drabble-A-Thon!

What is it?

From September 6th to September 15th, I will be offering 1,000-word drabble commissions for $5 through Ko-Fi!

Why is this a thing?

My job pushed back my start date by a month and a half, and I've noticed that my 3-year-old phone's screen is starting to burn out (my last phone lasted 5 years and I am incredibly salty about this). I want to take the week I'm off to try and get some outside work to start saving up to replace it and stay ahead on bills despite the delay. 

How does it work?

If you make a donation of $5 on Ko-Fi, and give a 1-2 sentence description of your drabble idea in the donation note, I will write a 1,000 word* story! The story will be posted publicly on Ko-Fi, and cross-posted to Tumblr as well**. These will be done on a first-come first-serve basis, and I will keep a post on Ko-Fi and Tumblr updated on what number submission I am on. Because I don't know how many prompts will be given, I can't give a firm estimate on when the pieces will be delivered, so the queue will be the best way to see when your request is being worked on! 

*The finished drabble will be a minimum of 1,000 words, if I go over by a bit, that is on me, and just a fun bonus for you! 

**Ko-fi has strict guidelines for NSFW material, and anything rated "Explicit" will only be able to be posted to Tumblr. If you would like a PDF copy as well, please provide an email address to send it to in your message!

Are there any rules I should know about?

First and foremost, please make sure that you read my general commission guide which can be found here. Keep in mind I do not write Sub!/Bottom!Tomura or Dom!/Top!Dabi. If you have a question about your concept that is not answered by the guidelines, please feel free to DM me on Tumblr before donating! 

In addition, please note that 1k isn't a lot of words, so try to keep concepts simple enough to be executed within that amount of story! 

These drabbles also cannot be add-ons to other existing stories. For example, no drabble prompt can be for a story set after the end of Changing Currents, or an exploration of Dabi's time on the streets before Tomura adopted him in A Cat by Any Other Name. These are for stand-alone pieces in order to keep things simple and not conflict with the canon of my existing works! 

Can I donate more than $5 to get a longer story?

No. This is a drabble-a-thon! While you are welcome to donate however much you would like, every $5 only gets one 1k word story. If you would like to donate $10, then you are welcome to put two drabble prompts in your donation note which will then both enter the queue and be posted! Every multiple of 5 is eligible for a new prompt! 

If you would still like a longer story from me, then you can always DM me about setting up a full commission! 

I want to participate, but I want to remain anonymous/I want to be tagged by a name other than the name used for the donation.

No problem! If you want to remain anonymous, simply put your name as "Anonymous" in for your name/nickname, and you can then type your prompt in the message box. You can send this message privately, and only I should be able to read your prompt! 

If you want to be tagged by your Tumblr username, then you can also add that in your message and I will tag you appropriately when your prompt is posted! 

I want to participate but I don't have any idea what to ask for!

Coming up with story prompts can be hard! You can send in 1-2 sentences of your idea, or you can simply send in a kind of AU, a rating, or a kink (or a few of them 👀), and let me take it from there! If you really, really can't think of anything at all, then just send in "Free Style", and I'll come up with something to fill the drabble! This is meant to be fun, please don't feel any pressure!

I want to participate, but I don't have any money!

That's absolutely okay! Please do not feel any pressure to participate! Money is tight for a lot of people right now and your needs, safety, and comfort come first! 

My question wasn't answered here! 

Please feel free to DM me or send an ask on Tumblr! I'll do my best to answer! 

Thank you so much to anyone who chooses to participate! I can't wait to see what stories we're able to bring to life! 

[gwenaelle-art]

Hey, I don't like being in this position of begging but I am desperate. For the last 5 years I have been living with physical, mental, verbal and financial abuse from the family I live with. I've been doing my absolute best to get through it all in the hopes of seeing my girlfriends happy and living a peaceful life with some modicum of control for myself. My entire life is trapped inside one single bedroom, one of my girlfriends has been subjected to this same treatment which only makes me feel all the worse with it being my family at fault. Transphobic behaviour also prevents my ability to seek HRT and the financial manipulation only makes everything else all the harder.

My mother manipulates police and housing officials to nullify every legal action I take against this behaviour, I don't understand how but it is apparently possible. She has been lying to the landlord to make them believe she still lives here and because she earns a good wage, it makes rent here all the higher. She refuses to shift utility bills into my (or anybody who lives here) name and so the bills go without government grants and cannot be negotiated without her direct input. We're looking at having our utilities cut within the next 30 days as a result of this.

I have been forced to take in housemates I do not agree with. I have had several stitches from physical abuse, my lip was punctured by my tooth, my nose has been broken and several black eyes. My right shoulder has been damaged and scans show the socket is starting to wear down and nerves are being harmed by the dislocation. I have had several teeth broken and the dental work has been very extensive from this.

These housemates raid my room for whatever they want any time I am out. Cutlery, clothes, electronics, food, drinks, money, furniture, dishes, etc etc.. the list goes on for much too long. To make matters only worse, whenever these housemates *do* pay part of the rent, they only pay 1/2 of what is due.

My housemates aren't listed as tenants of the house but any action I take to my advantage on that, is nullified either by claims that there is not enough proof they live here or my mother getting it ignored. The damage they and their pets have caused to this house is extensive and with only myself and my girlfriend as present tenants, we are losing credit with our housing agency, we may never be able to find a house through them again and they are considering removing us at this time but there is no clear timeline on that.

Police responses to all of these events have been abysmal and I don't have anywhere else to turn than to just get away as fast as I can. I lack the ability to make enough money on my own to outpace the bills and rent but I want to open a savings pool that I will not touch until I can move away.

The plan right now is to keep any money I make extra aside as solely a moving out fund that I will not touch unless it is to go toward a new home. I will move out of this house and since my mother will not remove her name from the, now overdue bills, it will not be my problem. I will be entirely leaving my family behind, restraining orders will be involved and I will finally have the agency over my life I need.

Anyway, all of this is just for me to say, I have a donation pool available through Ko-fi and I do commissions too, so feel free to grab one if you want too. A few examples of my own work are below

https://ko-fi.com/gwenaellemun/goal?g=0

[assaily]

Hi, it's been a while. I'm here to feed the fandom with some fic snippets. I've been having some of the worst creative block of my life this last year but I've made it another rotation around the sun today so I thought I would share what I have been working on.

Working title: Something Delicate Something (still working on it obvs) Colloquial title: Buffalo Wild Wings Main themes: Vulnerability and accepting help

This is from the silly little wing-fic I occasionally tease about. Wings are a rare genetic mutation that only occurs in a small percentage of the population, so Klaus is the only other one besides Five who has wings. People aren't born with wings, but grow them during adolescence. Five is about to grow his but he's the only one that knows that, but his siblings may or not suspect something. When he grew them in the apocalypse, they emerged with one weak, broken, and useless (because he was starving and alone). They were a burden on him his whole life, a point of weakness. The Commission removes them when they picked him up, a cultural taboo that Five is convinced was a necessary procedure. He's afraid to tell his brothers about his wings, afraid to share that vulnerability with them.

Takes place about a year and half to two years after they save the world and return to a timeline much like their original. Five has a large mental break before this part of the story that spurs his brothers into taking better care of him. Five doesn't know how to feel about being taken care of like that.

Klaus did think he was an angel, going so far as to exclaim it loudly for the whole house to hear when he offered the half-cream-half-coffee. He was nearly done molting now, most of his flight feathers coming back in at once, but he was sleeping for periods of twelve hours or more.

Klaus complained about how exhausted he was and how badly the poor things itched. Five patiently brushed oils into the new feathers and carefully picked the loose ones coming out. Klaus had the misfortune of both having large wings and having a molt that happened in one big collapse. It meant a mess.

So while his brother sat in the nest of blankets, pillows, and feathers in his room sipping his cream, Five acquired a broom and started the great clean-up task. Approximately twenty-eight minutes after Five woke him up, Klaus started his stereo, playing something with a gentle piano at a medium volume so it filtered out into the hallways for Five.

It’s easy to work to, and Five lost himself into a rhythm of sweeping and piling the dark tawny feathers together. The sun was peeking in through the windows when Klaus came out to take his empty cup downstairs for a refill. He came back up fifteen minutes later with two mugs and Diego with a much larger broom in company.

“Back up has arrived,” Klaus said cheerily, trading Five the refilled mug for his broom. “Go sit down or something, me n’ Diego can finish this.”

Five only relinquished the broom because Klaus wordlessly threatened to keep the coffee hostage until he did. “I can finish,” he groused, taking a sip and getting instantly distracted. Klaus had been getting very good with a french press lately, and Five was coming to appreciate it. Based on the twinkle in his brother’s eyes as he watched Five drink his coffee, Klaus knew just how good at it he was getting. 

“Go, shoo, we got this. You’ve done enough.”

Five turned his attention to Diego, standing silently by watching the two of them interact like an onlooker at the zoo. “How’d you get roped up into this?”

Diego shrugged, failing to smother a smirk. “Klaus was telling me what a good doting brother you’ve been lately, and we both decided you needed to take a break.”

Five squinted at him, suspicion stirred by the smirk. “Taking care of this idiot,” he jabbed a thumb at Klaus. “Is probably the least stressful thing I’ve ever done in my life.”

“Aww, thanks,” Klaus said sincerely from where he’d started tidying up Five’s already made piles. 

“Still,” Diego said, something false about his casually friendly smile, but Five still wasn’t good enough with faces to identify the issue. He sidled up to him, switching the broom from one hand to the other. “It’s so nice of you to help.”

Klaus glanced back at them and straightened with a jolt, Diego’s name forming around his lips. Five sensed more than saw Diego’s palm coming to slap him on the back, and abruptly he understood what the ploy was.

Five would have preferred to save his coffee, but the rage that bubbled up from the pit of his stomach chose vengeance instead. The mug likely broke, spilling really good coffee all across the hallway, but the only one who got to see it was Klaus. Diego ended up being dropped from the second story into an open dumpster two blocks over– it was the closest open dumpster Five knew about, and would force him to walk back covered in trash. Five himself landed on a fire escape just long enough to make sure he hadn’t accidentally hurt Diego, before popping back to his room.

It was silly to be so mad about it, about practically nothing at all, but his hands still shook as he tore into his wardrobe for clean clothes and a towel. A hot bath would help him feel better, the steam would ease the headache drilling into the back of his skull and down his spine. Then he would take a nap, and if anyone had an ounce of self-preservation, he would remain undisturbed.

Of course, none of his brothers had self-preservation, or brain cells. Except maybe Viktor, but he and his lonely brain cell were woefully absent. Klaus was waiting for him in his room when he returned from his bath. He was glad he had the foresight to put a shirt on, but he’d really had hope for that nap.

“What do you want?”

“What, you’re up in my grill for a week and now you want nothing to do with me?”

“I wasn’t ‘up in your grill’. If you didn’t want me to help, you could have told me to go away. In fact you did, so I filled my schedule, I have shit to do, get out.”

“Okay, grumpy, jeez,” Klaus put his hands up, jumping up off the bed when Five came at him, threatening to use his damp towel as a weapon. “Is your back okay?”

“It’s fine,” he snapped.

“Really, cause Diego was gone for like half an hour, and he came back smelling like a dumpster, so I’m just wondering if he hurt you or something because that was really dramatic–”

“Get. Out.” He punctuated his point by snapping the towel loudly.

“Okayeeee!” Klaus yelped, leaping toward the door with an obscene cackle born of hysterical fear. Complete lack of self-preservation. If Five ever made that much noise while in danger, he would have been dead a hundred times over.

Five slammed the door shut behind him, closing his eyes and listening to his brother hover outside for about forty seconds before leaving. When Klaus finally shuffled away, Five let go the breath he was holding, scrubbing at his face.

He hadn’t slept much last night, or most nights. Less so lately with his back beginning to hurt so much. If Diego had touched him, the gig might have been up, he wasn’t sure he would have been able to hide his reaction. The uncontrollable rage was just a side effect of all the hormones his body was releasing, but he was also usually an asshole, so he didn’t think his siblings would notice the difference.

“Dramatic,” he echoed to himself. Sending Diego two blocks over and into a dumpster was a little dramatic, but the other option was the pond in the park a mile and half west of the academy. It seemed like an unnecessarily large expenditure of power to send him all that way, so Diego got the shorter, dryer walk. So really, Five wasn’t as dramatic as he could have been.

And if Klaus really saw that as just an innocent pat on the back, he was lying to himself and to Five. Diego was checking for lumps, or at least a reaction if he hit him hard enough. The lumps weren’t in yet but his back was already showing signs of the blood bruising, and was getting tender to all hell.

He’d done this all before, he knew what to expect, and this time would be a hell of a lot easier because of it. He didn’t need them losing their goddamn minds and crawling down his throat because Mom wasn’t here anymore and couldn’t take care of him like she would have Klaus. Five didn’t need to burden them with it either. He survived the first time, and he would again.

He made sure his door was locked before he went back to his bed and collapsed onto his stomach. He was still warm from his bath, and the last few days had been long and sleepless. He dozed off quickly, but didn’t sleep for long, carved awake as the infant growths under his skin pushed and shifted at his shoulder blades from beneath.

-

Diego was in the kitchen again when Five went down for food hours later. Luther was there too, but his gaze didn’t zero in on Five the second he appeared like Diego’s did.

“Oh look it’s the asshole who dropped me in a dumpster for offering to help.”

“Why are you still here? Don’t you have a job or something?”

“It’s my day off. Not that you would know, freeloader.”

“Child labor laws, idiot. I couldn’t get a job even if I wanted to.” Besides, he’d been pawning off some of the antiques their father had laying around so he wasn’t relying on his siblings’ wallets for luxury purchases. He mostly sold stuff out of the attic so he was sure none of them had noticed anything missing yet.

“Okay, look I just want to eat dinner in peace, please,” Luther interrupted. “Five, there’s a container for you in the fridge, I didn’t know when you’d be down for it so I stuck it in there, but it should still be hot.”

Five’s stomach growled at him at the prospect of food, smoothly digressing off the brewing spat with Diego. He turned to dig in the fridge, finding a plastic container with his name on it in Luther’s neat handwriting. If it wasn’t labeled, Klaus would eat it. He was surprisingly respectful of labeled containers, however, so Luther had gotten very anal about making sure everything of Five’s was labeled. It forced him to eat it or give it away, which then alerted one of them to the fact that he hadn’t eaten it.

A convenient monitoring system for his brothers, a pain in the ass for Five. Though, and he would never admit it, sometimes he would pop down to the kitchen whenever everyone managed to be out of the house but him, and root through his labeled containers like a raccoon with his favorite garbage. 

Five pried the lid off his container, broccoli beef with white rice. Fried foods grossed him out more than he would have liked to admit, but the only one that actually cared was Klaus, who thought it was sacrilege, but then helped himself to all of Five’s portions of the fried take-out Luther always brought home. Luther cottoned on quick and made sure to order him the white rice.

While he worked for the Commission, Five had to be careful what he ate because his stomach couldn’t handle much after so many decades living off expired canned food and whatever he could grow. That was less of a problem now, he could even drink straight milk and oil if he wanted and his young, stout little body would digest it without so much as an ounce of indigestion. No, it was the fact that Five had gone so long without salt and basic spices, that even the beef gravy mixed with the plain rice was still intensely salty to him. Oily fried foods had a taste to them that Five struggled to stomach, instincts still telling him it would make him sick.

Besides, Five could afford the luxury of being picky these days, so he would be.

“Fork,” Luther said, even as Five started throwing pieces of broccoli into his mouth with his fingers. 

Diego snorted, shaking his head before tucking back into his noodle dish. He didn’t seem inclined to keep fighting, so Five sat down at the table opposite both of them after he got himself a fork from the drawer. 

Luther waited until they were all at least halfway through their meals before he started with a casual, “So, Five, it’s been ten days since you’ve last left the house.”

Five glared at him over his dinner. So much for eating peacefully.

“You know what that means,” Diego chimed in, looking a bit too smug at Five’s instant discomfort.

“I have library books that need to be returned anyway,” he said with a heavy sigh.

“I was actually hoping we could go somewhere besides the library.”

Five frowned down at his rice, pushing it around with his fork. His stomach had instantly gone up in knots, and he wished Luther hadn’t done this over dinner. It was hard enough to eat as it was. “What do you have in mind?”

“Well, it’s been over a year since you’ve been to the doctor–”

“I would need an appointment, wouldn’t I? Don’t have one as far as I know.”

Luther puffed his cheeks out and inclined his head forward and to the side like he was ashamed of something. “I didn’t want to alarm you and have you spend the whole week overthinking it.”

A numbing buzz started in the tips of his fingers and began crawling through his palms and up his arms. “You made one,” he said faintly, feeling the blood drain from his face.

Diego grimaced, eyes darting between him and Luther. “It’s alright Five, we’ll both go with you. Klaus, too if you want.”

He swallowed thickly, the room around him narrowing down to pinprick sounds and details. The buzzing of the lamps, the tick and churn of the dishwasher, the faucet that no one had gotten around to tightening up, drip drip dripping into the sink below. His brothers, just across the table from him and miles and miles away, each breath they took like thunder in his ears.

“No one has to go, just tell me where it is.”

“I have to go. I’m your legal guardian, remember?” Luther said softly.

“I’m not going.”

“Five–”

“I’m not going.” And he refused to listen to whatever reasoning they had. He wasn’t dealing with it, not right now. He sent them both one final glare each before he blinked back upstairs.

He knew he would only have a few minutes before someone was at his door, Luther rarely backed down that easily when it came to getting Five out of the house, and there was no doubt in Five’s mind that Diego had been there as backup. He stepped toward the window and reappeared on the fire escape, then again on the roof.

He wasn’t thinking about his blinks, following line of sight so he didn’t have to do so much calculation, landing his final jump in the greenhouse on the roof. The setting sun shone through the opaque walls and cast his world in a gentle peachy orange. The smell of soil and dust was familiar and warm, and allowed him to take the deep breath his lungs desperately needed.

“The fucking doctor,” he spat. “They want me to go to the doctor? Now of all fucking times!” He rolled his shoulders without thinking, flaring pain from between his shoulder blades and down his spine. There was no way, the doctor would see the bruising, would no doubt want to examine his back–

He wrapped his arms around himself, pulling his clothes tight over his spine. “No,” he told the universe, the green house, his brothers downstairs that couldn’t hear him, and the theoretical doctor he’d never met. “Absolutly not, you’re not going to touch me, not without losing some fingers; go fuck yourselves. You can go fuck yourselves!”

-

He hid in the greenhouse until well after dark. When he finally went back to his room, his door was left wide open from where Luther had no doubt come barging in looking for him. His room otherwise dark and empty, or so he thought. He closed his door before he heard the rustle of feathers on his bed, scowling into the darkness

“I didn’t yell at you earlier about it, but you’re gonna get feathers on my bed.”

The lamp at his bedside popped on, Klaus stretched out across the mattress like a cat. “I heard you didn’t want to go to the doctor.”

Five scowled all the harder. “Don’t need it, you can’t make me, I’m not going.”

“Why not?”

“I’m not going to have a stranger poking and prodding me and asking me if Luther has given me the sex talk yet.”

Klaus let out a surprised wheeze of a laugh. “No, alright, that’s fair. You didn’t object this badly last time, was it really that bad?”

It really hadn’t been. The doctors who thought he was an actual thirteen year old treated him with a hell of a lot more respect than any doctor he had had the misfortune of dealing with when he worked for the Commission. “Yes,” he answered anyway.

Klaus raised an eyebrow, seeing right through him. “No, tell me what’s really going on, Five.”

[kaybreezy3000]

Dumped in a new world with no powers and abandoned by his family, Five quickly found himself in a very bad place both mentally and physically.

Piece by piece, Five tried to push away his pain and erase the proof of what had been done to him. He survived like he always did, but there's a fine line between surviving and living, and living is hardly what he could say he’d been doing with his new life.

Not until years later did Five see that nothing he had done could fix what had been broken inside of him. For that to happen, it would take another fateful rainy night and another shocking encounter that would completely turn his world upside down.

~This the first chapter (1600 words) of the full story that was originally posted on A03 6-16/2023 but was just reposted on there today to honor pride month, and because of edits done to make it fit more with what we know about the real season 4. Even if this is not your normal pairing, please give it a chance. Out of all the things I have written, this story is my favorite. You might love Five even more after reading it. ❤️_see AO3 link at bottom to read the rest.

~This one starts out very dark, so please heed the tags. It gets worse before it gets better but it's all for a reason so hang in there.

Some of the Tags (see A03 for full list): Rated M or E, attempted rape/non con, PTSD, trans female character, angst, first-time, finding yourself, revenge, unexpected romance, sub/dom, sexually explicit content/adult themes, sexual humor, overcoming tragedy. seeing yourself and others with openness and love, Five’s time travel fix-it optional finale to the show. -There are warnings on chapters so you can skip bad parts

Chapter One: Prologue

The Morning After

The heavy rains had stopped hours ago, and the sun was rising in a rosy ball of brilliance on the horizon. Five squinted against its rays as he nervously scanned his surroundings while he limped from the motel lobby, across the parking lot to his room. Due to the very early hour, there were very few people out, but he still couldn’t bring himself to let his guard down until he was out of harm’s way.

An old woman sitting on a bench in front of one of the other rooms was watching him, but she was harmless. Five could tell that she was only looking because he was too young to rent a hotel room. He was a kid, without an adult, and he was wearing an expensive three-piece suit and that wasn’t something you’d normally see in this kind of neighborhood.

She was clearly concerned, and thankfully she hadn’t been the only one to look at him in that way in the last eight hours.

Even though it had happened, Five still couldn’t wrap his head around the kindness a near stranger had shown him when his own family had deserted him. If not for the man Five had met earlier at an all-night diner, there was no saying where he’d be, or what else bad might have happened to him.

Five took one more look around him to make sure nobody was about to jump him, then he stuck his key in the door and entered the musty room.

His eyes scanned the beat-up furniture, the stained carpet, and ugly geometric patterned bedding laid out on the sagging mattress. It reminded him of the rooms The Commission put him up in.

As odd as it was, at that moment, Five wished he could go back to the simplicity of those unpleasant days.

Eat, sleep, kill people, and survive long enough to get back to save his family. That was all he had to do, and he was fine.

Now he wasn’t sure what would become of him, and he was not fine.

After checking the main area and the attached bathroom to make sure no one was hiding in there, he rushed back to the door to deadbolt the lock and fasten both security chains.

Five’s back slid down the wall behind him as his plastic bag full of cheap clothing from the drugstore slipped from his hand.

Unable to fight it anymore, he folded in on himself in a crumpled heap. He buried his head in his hands, his fingers digging into his aching skull as if he could force the pain away.

Everything hurt despite the over-the-counter pain meds he had taken, but the thing bothering him the most was the warped way he was seeing himself.

Everything inside him felt wrong.

Five’s chest began to tighten, and his heartbeat started to pound in his ears. It felt like the whole thing was hitting him all at once, assaulting him all over again.

He broke out in a cold sweat followed by hair raising goosebumps.

To his horror, he could feel the prickling sensation of hands touching him in ways they shouldn’t be.

Suffocating heat waves suddenly ripped through him. His skin felt like it was on fire and he wished so badly he could crawl out of it and his extreme shame.

As if on cue, somewhere outside sirens wailed.

To add to all this, Five could see bare and battered flesh, and those frightened eyes looking out through metal bars that were meant to detain an animal not a human. Those eyes were wordlessly asking him for help.

That person had been bound so tightly and was in such bad condition that Five could hardly believe they were alive still. The sight of someone so young like that in that place was so wrong, just like what had just been done to him.

Five wasn’t doing well before seeing that caged boy, and after finding him, Five’s shocked state only got worse.

He could hear the blaring sound of the law getting closer and he had to go.

He didn’t even attempt to break the boy free. He had heard everything that happened to him and he'd seen him, but he evidently chose not to reveal any of that to the police. 

That stranger had protected him.

With gut-wrenching guilt overwhelming him, for about the millionth time in the last twelve hours, Five couldn’t catch his breath.

On the floor of his motel room, Five's voice came out so weak. “I didn’t have a choice,” he whimpered, pleading with that boy he had let down to forgive him even though he was all alone. 

He shut his eyes again. That sorrowful face was gone but the unwelcome hands were back.

“Please, no. Not this. Anything but this,” Five begged, in a fruitless effort to stop his own mind from tormenting him.

Soon he was bombarded with ghosts of laughter mixed in with a steady song of his own desperate cries. 

As strong as Five’s mental fortitude had been all his years, at that point, he couldn’t shake his hallucinations or silence the voices, no matter how hard he squeezed his eyes closed or pressed his hands over his ears.

Five could feel himself being physically crushed all over again as he was mercilessly held down.

“Stop,” he breathed over and over, trying to force the hands away, but all that resulted was a broken man in a boy’s broken body falling apart in the shadows of a rent by the hour motel room.

When Five's mental breakdown finally subsided enough for him to somewhat function again, he pulled his stolen pistol free from where he still had it tucked in the back of his dress pants. As he bound his arms around his thin legs, he gripped the weapon tightly in his shaking hands, like it could protect him from the blind panic that was threatening to pull him under.

Five's dark hair spilled over his boney knees as he rested his forehead on them. Silent tears ran like a river down his cheeks.

He kept telling himself that things could have been worse. The mystery person he had left behind didn’t know who he was, and they would never see each other again. That boy was still alive thanks to him and if he hadn’t come along, they probably wouldn’t be.

At least Five could say that.

As if by some miracle, now he had a very fragile feeling of safety thanks to the money in his pocket and the motel room to hide in. Letting those somewhat positive facts sink in started to help slow his breathing, but soon Five began to beat himself up for screwing up so badly to begin with.

“Just knock it off! You may look like a child, but you really are a worthless fuckwit if you can't pull yourself together enough to stop acting like one. You are fucked up. What else is new!” he babbled, having a conversation with himself that mirrored many he’d had over his life while in times of skirting the edge of madness.

It took Five awhile to stop his internal beratement, and to stem his flow of burning tears, but he did. He was on the verge of mental and physical collapse, but he forced himself to get up. Driven by inborn stubbornness and venomous hatred, he tried to focus on the very odd conversation he had in the diner with the older stranger that had become his unlikely savior.

With somewhat of a plan forming in his head, one that involved going back to the diner the next night to meet up with his new acquaintance, Five’s motions were unfocused and zombie-like as he stumbled to the bathroom and started looking over his many injuries.

Angry red lines and purple bruises painted his thighs. As bad as he looked, there was no forgetting that every inch of flesh on that boy he saw tied up in that cage looked so much worse.

Trying not to lose it again, Five began to clean his wounds with supplies he purchased at the pharmacy. Then he showered, scrubbing his pale skin until it was an angry cherry red, but he couldn’t stop because the longer he abused his own flesh, the more a new form of numbness settled inside of him, acting like a buffer to drown out his sickening levels of shame.

Redressed in simple black sweats, a white t-shirt, and a zip-up sweatshirt, Five set about taking care of the pile of his dirty clothes on the floor. With repulsive thoughts coming back, he quickly tossed the underwear he had been wearing in the garbage. Then he washed his dress shirt in the sink and did his best to freshen his suit by hanging it up.

In a basket on the small dresser, he found a comb, a toothbrush and toothpaste, and even a travel sewing kit. Almost too tired to see straight, he yanked the snarls out of his hair and brushed his teeth. Lastly, he sat down on the hard bed and restitched the metal clip inside his fitted pants so that it would stay latched, and his pants wouldn't fall down. Then he added a top button to replace the one that was torn off when his pants were forcefully yanked down. 

Piece by piece, Five had tried to erase the proof of what had been done to him, but not until years later did he fully gather that nothing he had done then, or in the years to come, was ever going to be enough to fix what had been broken inside of him. For that to happen, it would take another fateful rainy night and another shocking encounter that would completely turn his world upside down.

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To read on, hit link: 'No More the Victim'

This one is a great piece of art, but Not mine...still, so perfectly dark and sad and perfect for this first chapter, so when it was sent to me to go with the story, I had to include it.

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