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lucky-clover-gazette · 6 months ago

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captive prince book 1 highlights & annotations

chapter 3

indented text is from the book. some quotes have commentary, some do not. some comments are serious, and some are definitely not. most of them will only make sense to people who have read the series. and, like, there are spoilers. so please read the books first if you're interested!

also: part of the reason i'm doing such a close reading is to study cs pacat's style, especially in terms of how she does romance and erotica. there are "craft notes" that might seem weird, like i'm being redundant or restating something rather than analyzing, but those are things that i want to remember/take away from the writing!

i'm going to tag these longer posts with "sam reads capri" in case anyone wants to read them all at once.

this is a google doc i wrote with overall content warnings for the captive prince series. it's not perfect, but i do think it's important to include.

The Regent keeps him around. No idea how the Prince got him in the ring, but that one would do anything to piss off his uncle.

context: laurent wanted damen to lose—we know this because of the drugging. but i suppose that annoying the regent with govart's loss was a consolation prize? and he would have been... equally annoyed, if govart won? laurent cannot possibly think that the regent cares about govart's well-being, but maybe govart is a reflection of his authority. honestly, not too sure about this one.

craft note: “piss off” is a great anachronism here

Laurent might talk like he’d been raised on the floor of a brothel, but he had a Veretian courtier’s mind, used to deception and double dealing.

maybe try to make it sound like less of a compliment

‘I wouldn’t have thought of that. He has a mind for details.’ ‘Yes, I’m learning that,’ said Damen.

Maybe he just wanted another chance to fight something. Preferably an insufferable yellow-haired princeling.

‘Today, in the baths, you will serve.’ ‘Serve?’ said Damen.

he is technically serving cunt. a cunt named laurent

Laurent reclined against the tiled wall, settling his shoulders flat against it.

laurent lean #2

Laurent rearranged himself against the wall into a position that looked even more indolently comfortable than the one before.

laurent lean #3. also, this line is very funny

Those sweet blue eyes gazed at him.

normal reaction to an implied death threat

'Your little speech about fair play fooled me about as much as your show of obedience.'

context: laurent can’t conceive of damen being a decent person without an ulterior motive. given the fact that he's spent the past seven years in the regent's court, i can't really blame him

For Laurent was all of a piece: his body had the same impossible grace as his face. He was lighter built than Damen, but his body wasn’t boyish. Instead, he possessed the beautifully proportioned musculature of a young man on the new cusp of adulthood, made for athletics, or statuary.

damen has no idea how much it would probably mean to laurent to be seen as definitively non-boyish

The water was hot when it pulsed up from the ground, and hot when he poured it from the silver pitcher. The air was hot. He was conscious of it. He was conscious of the rise and fall of his chest, of his breathing, of more than that.

craft note: awareness of non-sexual physical sensation (heat, breathing, etc.) helps to build up tension. also, the repetition here is neat.

He remembered that in Akielos he had been washed by a slave with yellow hair. Her colouring had matched Laurent’s so closely they might have been twinned. She had been far less disagreeable.

damen likes blondes mention #3. another favorable comparison towards laurent, although he does get points off for being a bitch

‘Don’t be presumptuous,’ said Laurent, coldly. ‘Too late, sweetheart,’ said Damen. Laurent turned, and with calm precision unleashed a backhanded blow that had easily enough force to bloody a mouth, but Damen had had quite enough of being hit, and he caught Laurent’s wrist before the blow connected.

the girls are fightingggggg

craft note: i really like “damen had had quite enough of being hit.” it’s a massive understatement, which for damen’s characterization and the book’s sense of humor works perfectly.

He felt the tension hit Laurent’s body, though the tone didn’t change overmuch from its usual drawl. ‘But my voice has broken. That was the only prerequisite, wasn’t it?’ Damen released his grip, as though burned. A moment later, the blow he had thwarted landed, harder than he could have imagined, smashing across his mouth. ‘Get him out of here,’ said Laurent.

the amount of times i had to re-read this conversation and previous dialogue, to understand what the hell was going on between the lines...

context: damen previously made a flippant comment about not assaulting people whose voices haven’t dropped. it was meant as a dig towards the court of vere, which enables csa.

laurent wants an excuse to torture and/or kill damen while his uncle is away—knows that the court would see this retribution as justifiable if damen were to attempt an assault of the veretian prince.

laurent brings damen to the baths in order to essentially make his case for his revenge. he needs to create circumstances in which retribution is justified, and since sex = power to laurent—just another strategy—he sees a way to make that happen by teasing damen. he does not expect to feel anything while enacting this plan, as he is very used to dissociating during these kinds of situations.

laurent: “don’t be presumptuous” = “stop assuming we’re going to have sex, even though it was my plan to put us both in this intentionally erotic situation. i’m more uncomfortable than i thought i would be with this and i’m deflecting.”

damen: “too late, sweetheart” = “i am smug about the fact that this is making you uncomfortable. also, you’re hot, and i might as well enjoy the view.”

laurent: “but my voice is broken, that was the only prerequisite” = “by your own joking admission, i now have every reason to assume you’re going to assault me—and your obvious arousal does not help your case.”

damen, who has absolutely no intention to sexually assault laurent, is shocked by this and pulls away.

He had resisted the provocation to violence exactly because he had known he would end up suffering consequences. And now here he was, for no better reason than that Laurent, possessing a pleasing shape, had left off talking just long enough for Damen’s body to forget his disposition.

i love the implication that laurent is only attractive as long as he isn’t talking. damen is great at backhanded insults too!

‘I should have done this to you the day you arrived,’ said Laurent. ‘It’s exactly what you deserve.’

context: damen is not just some random akielion to laurent. laurent knows that he is damianos, and that damianos killed auguste, leading to seven years of abuse, sexual assault, and isolation for laurent within the regent's court. what he does here—having damen flogged to near-death—is still bad, but at least there’s more depth to the badness than damen or a first-time reader would understand.

from damen's pov, and for a first-time reader, this entire situation is sadistic and impersonal. but with full awareness of laurent's perspective, i can understand that it is essentially cathartic revenge. losing auguste to damen's blade forced laurent to experience the kind of trauma that changes a person forever. the person he has become is a reflection of that trauma, and damen is the ultimate scapegoat.

also, flogging is not exactly cruel or unusual punishment in this world—in fact, damen mentions that he's done it himself to akielion soldiers. it's notable that instances of damen's subtle hypocrisy appear in these earlier chapters: the flogging, parallels between kastor's rule and the regency, and akielion slavery. pacat is methodically building a house of cards with damen's unreliable narration from the start.

(when i call damen an unreliable narrator, it's not because i think he's a bad person or protagonist. he's an unreliable narrator in the same way that holden caulfield is an unreliable narrator: heartbreakingly earnest, ignorant due to inexperience, and within the ethos of the novel, ultimately Good.)

‘You are cold-blooded and honourless. What held back someone like you?’ It was the wrong thing to say. ‘I’m not sure,’ said Laurent, in a detached voice. ‘I was curious what kind of man you were. I see we have stopped too early. Again.’

this first book really is just the two of them playing a high-stakes game of “are you a good person” chicken

‘I was on the field at Marlas,’ said Laurent. As the words penetrated, Damen felt the world reshape itself around him. ‘They wouldn’t let me near the front. I never had the chance to face him. I used to wonder what I’d say to him if I did. What I’d do. How dare any one of you speak the word honour? I know your kind. A Veretian who treats honourably with an Akielon will be gutted with his own sword. It’s your countryman who taught me that. You can thank him for the lesson.’ ‘Thank who?’ Damen pushed the words out, somehow, past the pain, but he knew. He knew. ‘Damianos, the dead Prince of Akielos,’ said Laurent. ‘The man who killed my brother.’

i went into the context for this already, but i do just think it's insane that laurent is both torturing and gaslighting the person who ruined his life. like, remember the guy from the princess bride? "my name is inigo montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die." laurent is essentially doing the same thing with damen here—cathartic and premeditated revenge killing, karma's a bitch, an eye for an eye—but instead he's like "my name is laurent of vere, you were present in the battle where someone else murdered my brother (i know that you know you actually did it), prepare to be tortured and possibly killed based on my own unpredictable and sadistic whims. whore."

#capri #sam reads capri #captive prince #laurent of vere #damen of akielos #lamen #kinda

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gingergofastboatsmojito · 7 months ago

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Season 3 Predictions (?) Part II

Critics, teamwork, awards (?)

If interested, please check Part I right HERE.

I will stay away from Sydcarmy for a whole minute here, guys. But later on I will get into to it, because... why not?

In terms of The Bear, I think the key is gonna be in the critics.

That's why Storer made sure to wipe out the 1st S3 teaser that came out, where Fak and his brother called Carmy in and showed him the wall full of critics’ pics. It was a HUGE tell and Storer doesn't like to show all his cards at once. He's into breadcrumbs.

So, the critics → Some are under pseudonyms, like Sue Chan and Chris Black. Some others are not, like Julian Black.

That article above also mentions that this season of the Bear could be about positioning for the top — perhaps even for its own James Beard Awards. No mention of a Michelin Star, which I think very well could be the show's grand finale, in S4, if they don't get it this season that is, which let's face it, would be far more realistic. Although there's this little voice in my head that thinks that if Storer made a point outta mentioning that when Ever opened it won Best Restaurant in the World and got 3 stars THE SAME YEAR, that's foreshadowing Storer style right there, so The Bear might follow Ever's steps (Chef Terry's steps). I don't listen to the voices in my head that often though. I will make up my mind about that one once I watch S3. 📌 Putting a pin on it for now.

So back to the critics, they are real food critics IRL, Storer doesn't fuck around. That's no coincidence, he could have easily come up with original fictional characters, but he didn't. Now, there's a chance that because that scene got leaked, he will cut it out and it will die in the Editing room. But we all saw it already, so it doesn't matter. If you haven't seen it yet, here it is:

Source ↑ : @portraitofariel (thanks!)

Carmy and those guys on the wall go way back. They also made him who he is. Carmy knows them all, Carmy owned them in the past. He obviously didn't get to where he was: "Most excellent CDC at the most excellent restaurant in the entire United States of America" without owning their asses. But the price he paid for that was "too high", that's why when Syd said they were going to get a star he was not amused. Nothing new here, moving on.

Here's where the rock & roll really begins, Storer's style:

Some say that Sydney's character is inspired by the James Beard Award Nominee Mariya Moore-Russell (there's the M word again).

Mariya is from Chicago and was the first black woman to be awarded a Michelin star in 2019, when Storer was working on The Bear's script.

So clearly, those critics will play a pivotal role in all those awards and reviews that pave the way for those accolades.

[We are now entering Sydcarmy territory] Let's not forget that this is not really about The Bear or the awards for Carmy, it's about what he told Syd under the table:

And on the table:

So IMO is pretty safe to say that Sydney will follow Mariya's steps and be at the very least a JB award semifinalist, or will actually take the price and thus match Carmy. Now, that star, well... IF, and I can't emphasize this enough IF The Bear doesn't get its 1st star during its 1st year of tenure (back to the aforementioned Ever's foreshadowing), then that's because Storer will keep that ace up his sleeve for the series finale (S4), that is being shot as we speak. I'm not putting any money on a 5th season ever happening, but I don't think I ever wanted to be more wrong in my entire life. * fingers crossed *

My point is: S3 will be all about getting those awards, slaying the critics, and paying whatever price has to be paid to make that happen.

According to THR the 3 main characters that will carry the weight of the whole season on their shoulders are Carmy - Sydney & Richie, naturally our dynamic duo in the BOH and Cousin in the FOH. And according to FX's description of S3→ their bonds will be put to the test. I'm guessing Syd and Carmy will at some point be at each other's throats, well past the point of the "sorry" sign. This makes total sense because Sugar will be more focused on her baby and struggle to balance The Bear and her cub. (also, mending her relationship with her own mother). And also because Syd, Carmy & Cousin are the 3 characters that “love taking care of people”. Carmy makes Sprite for preggos, Syd makes omelettes for preggos and Richie loves taking care of his daughter whose his only soft spot. All of it was breadcrumbed in S2. Sugar doesn’t count on this one because basically she’s such a sweetheart that mothers everything that moves, it’s not a special trait of hers.

I also think Clairmy will not survive even if at some point they get back together, Carmy is gonna be in a relationship with his old Psycho self, and therefore he won't have any capacity to be in a romantic relationship with anyone else. The only exception, I hope, could be Sydney, because she will be on the exact same journey, which Storer foreshadowed on 02x02:

So, let's go! I'm sooooo ready for this!

#sydcarmy #the bear #the bear fx #the bear hulu #syd x carmen #carmy berzatto #carmy x sydney #sydney adamu #the bear season 3 #the bear s3 #gingerpovs #the bear meta

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thejakeformerlyknownasprince · 2 years ago

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I saw something in your review for, I think it was book 54, where you said that you’ve previously compared Cassie to an anti-Susan Pevensie. Where was the post where you made that comparison?

Not on this blog! It was actually a conference presentation I did 10+ years ago. I can summarize what I remember from that paper.

Becoming an adult is a process that's almost uniformly positive for boys becoming men, but a lot more fraught for girls becoming women. Men often have more status than boys; women often have less status than girls. Boys are lauded for developing (hetero)sexuality; girls are both pressured to and derogated for developing any sexuality. Man-ness is a sign of strength; many signals of woman-ness are also those of weakness or immorality.

Point 1 means that a fair percent of coming-of-age stories, including SF classics, struggle with girls' coming of age. Wendy (Peter Pan) resists growing up just as much as her male costars, but ultimately acts as an adult-ifying force on the Lost Boys. Lyra (His Dark Materials) becomes an adult through becoming sexual, even as her male friend Will becomes an adult through becoming independent. Same goes for Bev (It) — her male friends become adults through facing their fears; she becomes an adult through sex. So on.

Susan Pevensie (The Last Battle) is the example of this problem that's received far and away the most attention. Everyone from J.K. Rowling to Lev Grossman to Margaret Atwood has specifically called out the line where Susan's brother implies that her interest in "lipstick and nylons" has to do with her denial of Narnia. This criticism ignores the leadership roles Susan takes on in Narnia books 2 - 4, fighting in battles and leading diplomatic missions. But I do agree that "feminine adulthood = no more adventures" is an awful thing to convey to kids.

There are a bunch of attempted "fixes" of this moment, from the ham-fisted (Philip Pullman) to the nuanced (Tamora Pierce) to the blandly inoffensive (Neil Gaiman). [I’ll skip most of this part of the paper.]

And then there's Animorphs, and Cassie. I have no idea if K.A. Applegate or her ghosts were influenced by Narnia — I haven't found any direct commentary — but what I love about Cassie's story is that it's almost the same as Susan's, but framed in a different (feminist) way. Both are female heroes who enter an adventure story, wrap up the adventure, and take on adult identities. Both get one last call to action (Tirian using Susan's horn, Jake telling Cassie that Ax is missing) and both refuse that finalmost call, in the process refusing an early and glorious death in battle. Only the two arcs are framed completely differently.

Instead of Peter complaining that Susan has "lost Narnia," Jake tells Cassie she's "a one-woman army" who is "doing what you need to do and were born to do. Part of what we won was freedom for the Hork-Bajir... your job is to protect it" (#54). He and Cassie discuss that she now has the difficult task of living to maintain the legacy that Rachel and Jara and Arbron died for. Cassie isn't punished by not dying gloriously; she's just taking on a different heroic role that comes with no glory at all.

It's also notable that adult Cassie has become more fashion-conscious ("pestered by Patagonia" for endorsements) and more romantic with Ronnie than she was with Jake. But the fashion thing is neutral and bittersweet because Rachel's not there to tease her, while the romance is a sign she's healthy and adult now. It's the boys who run back toward adventure who are portrayed as wrong (Ax getting his crew killed, Marco's false shallowness, Jake and Tobias's implied suicidality). The girl brave and adaptive enough to become a woman is portrayed in a positive light. Similar story to Susan, but with a very different frame. And in many ways more effectively feminist than having Cassie take on the masculine "glory through death in battle" role would be.

There are a bunch of moments where Animorphs pulls similar framing tricks. "Tom joined the Sharing for a simple, silly reason: a pretty girl" (#6) would, in a majority of 20th century SF stories, have been phrased as the girl having seduced him; Applegate instead keeps the agency where it belongs through showing that it's silly to join a cult over a crush. Rachel responds to a boy in her class cat-calling her with "Of course I look good... I almost always do" (#32). When he calls her "stuck-up", she says "That's right, I am. Now you know the difference between good looks and a good personality." She's not denying her beauty or the work she puts into it; she's owning it and also not letting a boy own it.

In conclusion: Animorphs is great.

#animorphs #science fiction #speculative fiction #women in science fiction #cassie animorphs #susan pevensie #femininity #sexism #misogyny #animorphs spoilers #chronicles of narnia #tropes #c.s. lewis #k.a. applegate #feminism #in retrospect this is the paper that simultaneously let me go back to enjoying The Chronicles of Narnia #*and* ruined my ability to enjoy His Dark Materials #ya win some ya lose some

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theangryjikooker · 5 months ago

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Hello, TAJ! I remember quite a few months back you talked about the marketability of the members in the US market and how the majority are not desirable for investors to pursue. (I might be flavoring the sentence since I couldn't find the original post.)

Has Chapter 2 shaped up like you expected after that post? Do you think each remains the same in investor's eyes? *Outside of JK, is there any member you see as a far second?

*Not a JK stan.

Are you trying to get me in trouble? 😀 Lmao, kidding.

I recall that post, and to clarify, the question of marketability–specifically about Jungkook–was conveyed by execs through passive conversation, one not even brought up by the CEO of my company. I merely relayed that information, and some solos got their feelings hurt and lashed out.

I can't speak for other companies, but the label I work under is a host to Grammy-winning artists, and the CEO doesn't care about BTS that much from what I've been able to glean (not because they haven't won a Grammy; I merely bring up the distinction because the execs here have reaped rewards through the artists they already have signed). His stance on BTS is actually quite similar to others in his position when it comes to this influx of Kpop artists in the western space (i.e., a mocked trend but understanding it's profitable enough to exploit). The prevailing sentiment is that BGs/GGs don't have longevity; at some point, it's inevitable that they'll choose to prioritize individual career paths. They may maintain group activities in the background, but it's not as practical as investing in the individual who has the perceived mass appeal** and has that "western" flavor. TL;DR they want another Bieber, but that's the long game.

**Before some of you get your underpants wadded up, of course all the members have mass appeal. But stop conflating what you think is mass appeal with the definition that corporate has of mass appeal.**

Regarding BGs/GGs not lasting, that's where I do see where they're coming from. Yet, this is the first time we've seen a group of this magnitude smash records left and right; they might be the first BG to persist even past their so-called golden years. Labels can't talk about history that's still to be made.

Ch. 2 did turn out as much as I expected, personally speaking, but I'm not entirely convinced I saw all the members' (sans Jin) true potential outside of YG and NJ, primarily because of the time constraints. The only reason I think YG and NJ nailed what they meant to accomplish is because they're basically veterans at what they do, whereas the others just got a taste of what they could do with their own creations.

I will say, controversially, that I was mildly disappointed by the maknae line's output. Save for a few songs from TH, JK, and JM's respective albums, I wasn't a huge fan of what they delivered, but that's more a matter of personal taste. This isn't a commentary on how well they did because they all did well, but I was fervently for the hyung line's albums by the end of it.

But as far as what I heard in professional spaces? JK and YG's names came up often enough when JK was doing promotions and while YG was touring, but only for those already keeping tabs on them. My company was not one of them. JK is still, however, the one many people are eyeballing (e.g., some artists under our label have expressed an interest in collaborating with him, or so I've heard).

For me, I can think of a member who could pique execs' interest, but to be very frank, what I have to say about it would anger people. It would only anger people because the context does poke at things people are intensely sensitive to. People have proven on this website that they're not mature enough for that discussion, so I'm not going to dive into that. Aside from him, it'd be HS for me.

I do think a few of the members could catch any exec's attention for that idealized Bieber phenom they want, but having worked here for a while now, I can tell you that they would probably need to lean into things a bit that would mask, if not strip, them of what made them so special.** (My friend works for RCA, and we talk about what's happening with Lisa all the time).

**They're all special, yes, and they always will be. That's not what I mean. It's hard to explain the nuance of this if you aren't already exposed to what it is I'm talking about.**

Anyway, I think this sums it up. I won't/can't get any more specific. You should take all of this with a grain of salt; to you, this is merely opinion and hearsay.

#TAJ asks #curious anon #bts #industry talk

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heretic-altias · 1 year ago

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FFXIVWrite Day 11 - Once Bitten, Twice Shy

This is a prompt that legit would have worked for ANY character of mine, but Akku had the last prompt and i've spent a good portion this month attacking Altais's trauma with a stick, so you get a nice look at Kito's personal brand of drk trauma.

Don’t know my characters? Here’s a basic breakdown to help you out!

Kito’s mind was far too empty these days. He had grown used to Twintania’s constant presence, her constant commentary. But crossing the rift between worlds had spread the connection too thin, and all he could sense of her if he strained was a vague awareness of her soul confirming she was still alive.

Normally when his thoughts ran off on an unreasonable track, she was there to shut it down. But here, his thoughts were free to do as they pleased.

He swung his greatsword at a striking dummy, hoping the physical exercise would work well enough. But the battle at Holminster Switch still weighed on him.

They had won, sure. Even now he stood under the result of his efforts, the stars twinkling above for the first time in a century. But Kito knew he had not fought his best. It had been harder than any battle he’d fought in a long time. And he knew exactly why.

It was the same reason his self doubt was allowed to run this far. He relied on Twintania, perhaps a little too much. Her strength meant he never had to tap into the full extent of his own.

Which was a good thing. For him and people around him. A dark knight’s power was a terrifying thing. Kito knew that all too well.

The destruction of Bozja had left him alone, with no home or even purpose. He had been studying botany, but what was a man to do when the place he’d lived and studied and intended to remain was just gone? Perhaps that was why the soul crystal had called to him.

The large sword he now carried had hung over the fireplace of his childhood home for as long as he could remember. When he’d asked his father about it once, the Hrothgar who had raised him had simply laughed and said it was a relic of his failures.

Yet somehow against all odds, when Kito had stumbled through the ruins looking for anything at all, the sword had survived. To this day he wasn’t sure how. Maybe some property of the soul crystal embedded in its pommel had prevented its destruction. In his pain and his grief that crystal had called to him.

To control a dark knight’s power, one had to have a strong understanding of themselves. The ability to wield their emotions and not be wielded by them. A young man having just witnessed the destruction of his entire life and the loss of his entire family did not have that strength. He had spent years hunting imperial soldiers in a haze before coming to his senses.

He could not afford to slip that far again.

Twintania had told him countless times she could tell he was holding back. His aether was unusual, blessed by light yet aspected towards darkness. It made him exceptionally powerful at what he did. If he chose to be that powerful anyway. But he couldn’t. Maybe he had only battled enemies, but he hadn’t been in control of his actions. There was a very real chance it could end up pointed at innocents if he wasn’t careful.

He was supposed to be a hero after all. A hero did not give in to their darkness. Even here, where darkness was hailed as a savior he knew better than to believe otherwise.

Yet his battle against the first lightwarden told him he needed that power. They would only get stronger and smarter as the crusade against them continued. He needed to do the same.

He had to stop being afraid. He’d gotten away with it for this long with Twintania’s help, but here he was alone. Eventually, he would have to face his own darkness.

In his frustration, he lopped the head clean off the striking dummy. That was enough for him to decide to stop and head to bed. He had not broken past his fear tonight. And he doubted a striking dummy would ever be enough to cause him to do so. This would be a matter decided in a moment of life or death. That’s when he would know if he could do it.

And hopefully he could. Because this world needed darkness more than anything.

#ffxiv #final fantasy xiv #ffxivwrite2023

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dear-ao3 · 3 months ago

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back with more!

-so back to 2016 Briefly. i need you all to know that nico did Bonkers shit to win. this was pre driver weight minimum restrictions so to get weight off the car (so he could go faster) he took the paint off his helmet (it was previously yellow because he and lewis had yellow helmets when they karted together or something), he cut his socks, he took parts off his seat, he stopped cycling to loose muscle in his legs, he stopped sleeping with his wife to focus better and No he should Not have done this but its important to know that he Did and that was why he Stopped because he knew racing lewis was quite literally killing him and he couldnt keep at it

-and like willd shit happened that season too. notably they crashed into eachother in Barcelona and toto aparently made them pay for the damages. they had an insane teammate rivalry. one of the most insane.

-yes he is the only one to beat lewis at his peak in equal machinery

-so anyway he announces his retirement at the 2016 prize giving ceremony which was like less than a week after the championship was won

-prior to that he and lewis did a press conference together at the last race in abu dhabi and by all accounts theyre like not really getting along too well at this point and lewis spends like a whole several minutes praising nico being like yeah whatever happens happens in the race and ive loved racing with him as a teammate like we dreamed about this as kids im proud of him hes come so far blah blah blah and nicos like. in tears next to him (remember lewis didnt know that if nico won he was retiring) and nico says something about how the only thing he could manage to eat that week was fucking kellogg frosties which was the stupid cereal the two of them used to eat and yeah you all see how insane this is anyway i could go on but i will Not

-so nico retires after his first and only win to everyones surprise, lewis goes on to win 4 (or 5 depending on who you ask) consecutive titles

-nico fucks off and does his own thing for awhile, as i said hes married and he has two girls and he also has a youtube channel that he used after he left racing to pretty much like praise the shit out of lewis hamilton and his driving and whatever else

-he also returns to the paddock as a part time commentator for sky sports. which is very interesting because its pretty obvious every time that he is there that he hates pretty much everyone on the commentary team and has no regard for rules and just says whatever the fuck he wants. its pretty clear he doesnt do it for money (he has more than enough of that) but doe sit cause he actually like racing and cars and all that (its really interesting to hear him speak about the cars cause he actually knows how to explain things well)

-this is sort of a disaster sometimes but its an interesting disaster. because on top of everything nico is fucking Smart. im pretty sure (and again none of this is fact checked) that he got into some top engineering college and decided to race instead. like the things he knows about racing and cars is wild. so the normal commentators will say something and nico will be like no. incorrect. wrong. see what he did there? he lost 2 tenths on that corner. his brake balance was off. his engine mode needs adjusting. they need more downforce. or whatever. and he will be Right.

-he also just. says things. like again, theres really only so much you can reveal that is public knowledge. last weekend Alone when he was commentating on a practice session he was like hehe yeah so i have an offer in my email right now to buy part of alpine (a team which has repeatedly denied that they are Not for sale btw) and i could buy it but its too much of a disaster so im not interested. oh how much is it? why should i tell you??? oh i will anyway its a billion euros! for example.

-and then he will also call people the hell out. presently hes waging absolute war against mclaren because they refuse to distinguish a number 1 and number 2 driver and thats exactly the hot water mess that nico found himself in at mercedes with lewis (tho. as i have said. lando and oscar are NOT comparable to brocedes. no one ever was and no one ever will be again the circumstances were too insane)

-so yeah. he shows up in a cunty weird and kind of ugly outfit (usually consisting of several different shades of white), takes a picture in front of a team or a person or makes a prediction that curses someone (unless its lewis lewis is immune to the curse), says bonkers shit, prasies lewis hamilton live on air and then leaves

-and yeah he still praises the hell out of lewis and talks about how incredible of a driver he is and this and that and knows literally his driving style inside out and backwards (the clips of him commentating on lewis laps are insane) but despite this lewis will not talk about him, will not even mention him, will actually go out of his way to not mention him (for the Record i am obligated to put here that i dont think lewis owes nico anything at all whatsoever and i am not saying that he does, but this is a post about nico not lewis) meanwhile nicos like has anyone talked about lewis recently? has anyone pulled out an insane career stat of his that is slightly obscure? cause i will and ill do it right now

-and they live in the same apartment building in monaco but apparently dont speak to eachother because of how awful the teammate thing was but every now and then nico will drop some insane piece of lore that has everyone going hold on wait fucking What (like that lewis gets his kids presents at christmas)

-but yeah other than that hes like busy being a girl dad and posting on his favorite social media platform (LinkedIn) (yes i am serious) and spends a lot of time advocating for the environment and figuring out how to make f1 and cars better for the planet and all that and yes he also had a terrible botox era that we wont talk about but yeah overall. insane man. absolutely insane. no ones ever done it like him and no one ever will again.

photos for context:

nico and lewis gokarting

nico at williams in his peak britney era:

the nico lewis first podium that kills everyone:

nico at mercedes:

some fuck ass mercedes pr:

nico serving cunt at the paddock this year:

and if youre really enthralled, this highlight reel from his youtube

youtube

hey wait im also new to f1 but i saw the other ask and i was curious abt what you meant when you said no one will ever do it like nico rosberg?? also retiring after your first championship win is insane lmao what a power move

nico rosberg is just. he’s insane. he’s cunty. he’s wonderful. he possesses sass and audacity unlike any other. we unfortunately do not have time to get into his whole story (my lunch break is only so long) but here’s some highlights:

-technically he’s a nepo baby. his dad, keke rosberg, won the world championship in 1982 and they remain one of the Few father son duos to both win a world championship (don’t ask me who the others are idk but i know they exist)

-he and lewis hamilton met when they were kids in the late 90s sometime and were gokarting teammates at some point in i think the early 2000s? (not fact checking i don’t have the time rn) and they were Besties. they’ve talked about this before, mostly in older interviews, but the gist is that both of them were outcasts from the other karting kid in opposite ways (nico was the son of a champion and rich and lewis was from nothing and pretty much the only poc most of the time) and that drew them together and they were Menaces according to legend. everything was a competition and they trashed hotel rooms and ate pizza and ice cream and kellogg frosties and went to greece and dreamed of being in f1 together

-nico signed with williams in 2006. his teammate was mark webber. and nico had long flowing blonde hair (this is important). he crashed at one race and mark webber said “britney’s in the wall” cementing the nickname britney, like britney spears. jenson button (another driver) said later on that they called nico britney because he was “very pretty” (do with that what you will)

-he was just. insane. cunty. constantly looked like a european bond villain. wore god awful shoes. whole bit. once he stayed in his car when it got craned off the track cause he didn’t want his hair to get wet. which is insane cause he’s wearing a helmet it would have gotten equally as not wet had he gotten out.

-anyway, lewis made it to f1 in 2007 and they had their first podium together i think that year (?) and it’s cute and fun and oh boy you’re not ready for what these two have coming

-lewis won the championship in 2008 (but he almost won in 2007, his rookie year) at mclaren.

-nico went to mercedes when they recentered the grid in 2010. his teammate was michael schumacher, who was fresh out of retirement. (yes the michael schumacher, 7x world champion). michael fucked with nico endlessly according to legend, including making him piss in a bucket pre race because he would hog the bathroom until the last possible second. nico still out preformed him most of the time, and the car was mid as hell.

-michael retired part 2 at the end of 2012. and who replaced him but lewis hamilton

-so the two of them were teammates again. the cards were absolute Stacked against them. because yes they were besties yes they’d known eachother forever but the first person you’re judged against is your teammate. and you’re trying to beat your teammate. and lewis already had a championship. nico wanted a championship.

-2013 was relatively chill. the car was kinda mid. they did well but not fantastic and did some fuck ass pr (highly reccomend looking those videos up)

-2014 they had a car that could win. and they started fighting eachother for wins. they played all kinds of mind games against eachother and withheld stats and nico ran illegal engine modes (supposedly) and lewis said they were no longer friends after nico supposedly wrecked his monaco qualifying one year but they claimed they still supported eachother and were friends off track. lewis won in 2014 and in 2015. but nico was right behind him and he wanted to win a championship, he didn’t want to be a number 2 driver

-so in 2016 nico did some insane shit. he stopped sleeping with his wife so that he could get better sleep or something, he did weird things to cut weight, he basically did everything and then some to win. and then he did. he won the championship and then at the prize giving ceremony announced he was retiring. he didn’t tell lewis this.

more after i get off work :)

#not a complete list By Far but still #about gets the basics #one day ill write a whole essay about him but that day is not today #not a tag #from saph #f1 #nico rosberg #Youtube

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absolutelyfizzing · 3 years ago

Text

unwanted feelings

james potter x reader

description - You'd had a crush on James Potter for years and when he kisses Lily Evans in front of you, you are heart broken. Later you find that he didn't actually feel as you expected and he explains himself.

warnings - some angst, unsure reader, fem pronouns, self doubt, negative self talk, not eating for a day cause reader is avoiding someone

word count - 2800

A/N - so this one isn't my best work by far but i wrote it so looks like its getting posted. i don't know why all of my reader inserts lately are so fem and sort of bubbly, i guess it's sort of what i'm aiming for for myself right now but i'm sorry if it maybe isn't coming off as relatable.

MASTERLIST

Your throat tightened in anxiety as you watched James zoom around the pitch. He was reckless when he was playing quidditch and it was one of the things that made him great at the game and an excellent captain. It was also the thing that nearly gave you a heart attack every time you watched him play. You went to every one of his games and you always wore something of his with his colors when you were in the stands. You were stood up on your seat and a slightly bored looking Remus sat to your right, reading from a book you didn't recognize. You'd thought that Sirius playing would be enough to keep him interested but sports was just not something he enjoyed watching. You were usually that way as well but whenever James was playing, suddenly you were the most intent spectator in the stands.

You were more worried than you should have been. More worried than what was appropriate for a friend to be. That's what you were, friends. That had been reinforced many times by the shaggy haired boy and you tried desperately to get it through your head before you embarrassed yourself one of these days. Sometimes though, you just couldn't help it.

Really you might have thought he reciprocated if you didn't know any better. You often got comments on what an attractive couple you guys were but each time it was quickly corrected by James. Normally along the lines of 'Oh god no, we are just friends. Purely platonic' , sometimes followed by a shudder or a gag even. It upset you every time to no end but you played along. You rarely, if ever, contributed to the shooting down of any feelings but that was never noticed by the man you had feelings for.

You'd had a crush on him since you were probably in your second year and now you were coming to the middle of your seventh. There were a million times that you almost said something but every time there was a reminder that you were not the one he had eyes for. It usually took the shape of disgust at the thought of dating you or commentary as he pined over the Evans girl who you felt you could never compete with. How could you when she was just perfect. You saw her to the left of you as she stood in the stands as well and your hands shook with insecurity before looking back toward the game. Your heart raced nearly as quickly as James did around the pitch and you prayed that the snitch would be caught soon so that you could get rid of the stress surrounding you. You felt a hand on your right shoulder and you looked over to find Remus had stood and was looking at you caringly.

"Are you alright, Y/N?" He asked softly and you tried your very best to soften your gaze and calm your stance so you appeared less concerned with someone that you shouldn't have that much interest in in the first place.

"Of course I am. When am I not?" You smiled before looking out at the pitch.

"When youre watching the guy you're in love with play a dangerous game that you don't like." He stated simply in response to the question you meant to be rhetorical and your eyes widened.

"I don't know what youre talking about." You nearly whispered and Remus smiled.

"I'm not gonna tell anyone Y/N but its not exactly subtle. It probably doesn't help that I know the look on your face because it's how I feel too watching Sirius play." He was still smirking but your anxiety was far from eased.

"Oh god, does he know?" You asked scaredly, terrified that the answer would be yes and you would have to stop spending time with him.

"Shockingly, no." You sighed out in relief but Remus continued. "You should tell him though or else he might end up moving on."

"What do you mean? There's nothing for him to move on from. Everyone knows he's in love with Evans and he has made it pretty clear that he is opposed to being anything more than a friendly relationship with me." You choked out, struggling with the words leaving your lips but knowing them to be true.

"I mean he has a minor crush on Evans but it's nothing compared to the annoyingly huge crush he has on you. He's probably just overcompensating for the fact that he's insecure and doesn't want you to reject him."

"Why are you telling me this?" You asked sincerely. You were friends with Remus as you were with the rest of the marauders but it was nothing compared to the friendship they held within their group. You knew Remus was more loyal to James than to you so you couldn't understand why, if it was true, Remus would be telling you at all.

"Because he is trying desperately to move on seeing as he is under the impression that you aren't into him and I'd hate to see him throw something away that could be really good for him." Remus smiled gently and you looked at him gratefully.

"I really appreciate you telling me and all but I just don't think I can believe you. I can't even count how many times he has made a big show of not liking me. I love him too much to ruin what we have and I know that if I confessed and it went bad that I would lose him all together. I would rather have him in my life in a way that hurts than not have him in it at all." You stated sadly and Remus sighed but nodded in understanding.

"I get it but just know that I'm being honest and pretty soon he is going to give up on it. I just want to see you both happy but if its too big of a leap, I understand. That's exactly the excuse he tells the rest of us too."

Suddenly cheers erupted from the stands, cutting your conversation with Remus off as everyone ran to rush the pitch. The snitch had been caught and gryffindor won. You were excited for James but you were also a little terrified to walk onto the pitch to see him with the now conflicted thoughts running through your head. Your thoughts were stopped by the image in front of you which was causing the whole crowd to cheer. James had pulled Lily Evans into a kiss in his excitement and your heart stopped. You felt nausea rise in your throat and Remus caught your eye with a sympathetic look. You didn't look at him for longer than a second and you ran off the pitch with tears streaming down your face. You found your way up to your dorm, pushing yourself to get there quickly before the common room filled with students celebrating their victory. James was always one to love attention so he would be getting crazy after the game which he did just about every time they won.

When you made it to your bed, you hurried under the covers, throwing the shirt you were wearing which belonged to James onto the floor. You felt your heart clench at the despair you felt. You wanted to be upset at Remus for getting your hopes up but you knew he was sincere in his want to help. Still you felt that you would probably not be able to face James in the weeks to come. Maybe, given a little time, you could be around him and not be upset at the world for taking away your chance with him. As you laid in your bed, you stared at the ceiling. You felt tears streaming down your face and you grew angry at yourself. He didn't owe you anything, he wasn't into you. That wasn't his fault and it was so unfair of you to expect anything more from him when your feelings were not his responsibility.

You weren't sure how long you laid there but you could hear the party start and end in the common room. It must have been late. Sleep wouldnt come though, you could just feel your heart continue to break and you were stuck in a loop of self pity. You made the decision that the following days would be spent away from James if you could at all help it. That was probably what he wanted anyway and it was the only way that you would get over the pain you were feeling. At some point your roomates entered your dorm and sleep overtook you for a few restless hours.

When you woke up, the sun was barely on the rise. You hurried up and got dressed and ready. You were planning on getting to breakfast early to avoid running into any of the marauders. You found your plans were not going how you wanted when you entered the great hall to find a head of red hair next to a mop of black. Your throat tightened and you quickly moved to turn and head out of the great hall. You heard a familiar voice call your name but you rushed out before you could give it too much thought. You knew that if you let him try to convince you, you would end up having a very upsetting breakfast with your best friend and his new lover. You would rather avoid breakfast.

Throughout the day, avoiding James was proving to be harder than you had thought it would be. You had many of your classes with him and you even sat next to him in a few. He was insistently trying to get you to open up about why you were suddenly so closed off to him but you remained shut off, reassuring him that nothing was wrong and you were just a little tired from the game the day before. You avoided lunch for the same reason as you had avoided breakfast and you felt yourself starting to get a bit lightheaded. Your afternoon was spent avoiding James but soon he was preoccupied with Lily anyway.

You were hid in a corner of the library when a cough alerted you of someone's presence. You looked up to find the very eyes you hadn't wanted to see.

You pushed it down with a gulp and smiled a bit at him, trying desperately to keep the tears at bay but they were growing harder to hold back after keeping everything pent up all day. It probably didn't help that you were hungry and therefor a bit more emotional. You could feel the tears sitting in your eyes, waiting for something to go wrong so they had an excuse to escape you.

"I don't know what I did wrong." He mumbled while looking at the floor in front of you and you took a deep breath.

"There's nothing wrong James, I promise. It's just been a long day." You smiled and your heart picked up speed.

"Since when did we lie to each other?" He questioned and your heart stopped. You were left unsure how to respond.

"Since the truth would cause more damage than good." You spoke honestly. At this he looked up at you and your eyes met. A tear left you and James immediately moved to comfort you but you tried to move away, standing quickly to evade him. You regretted it as spots filled your vision, the lack of food catching up to you. You know that you turned a bit green for a moment because James looked slightly scared.

"Y/N I dont know whats wrong but you look like you should be getting to the hospital wing. You don't look well."

Before you could answer you felt your vision blacken and your legs give out before your consciousness left you completely.

When you woke up, you knew you were in the hospital wing. It smelled sterile and the bed was stiff underneath you. When you started to wake madam pomfrey came to check on you.

"You can't go around with an empty stomach like that again, do you hear me?" She scolded, though her eyes were soft. You nodded solemnly. "I was alerted that you hadn't been to the great hall to eat all day, you have to know that isn't good for you. I'm gonna have a prefect watch out for you the next couple days to make sure you're eating at meal times. Understood?" She asked again and once more you nodded before leaning back and sighing. You looked at your surroundings and were surprised to see the black haired boy next to your bed fast asleep. Your heart took off again and you felt trapped by your environment. As anxiety swirled around in your chest, James had woken up a bit.

"You're awake." James sighed, laced with relief. You still wouldn't make eye contact with him. You felt the bed dip as he sat on it and you looked up to watch him put his head in his hands as he leaned over. You felt guilt fill your chest more than it already had from hating that you felt any claim over the man in front of you. You knew you were in the wrong and the last thing you wanted was to cause him any pain. "Remus talked to me." He almost whispered.

At that moment, you wished you could have apparated to anywhere else in the world. You looked back down at your lap and tears were once again brought to your eyes. You felt betrayal that Remus would reveal your feelings to James.

"I'm sorry." You apologized and you fiddled with your fingers.

"Why are you the one apologizing, I'm the one whos behaved poorly." He assures and you shake your head.

"That's not fair to yourself. You're allowed to want to be with whomever you want and my feelings should have no effect on that. You've made it clear for years that you weren't interested in me and it is my fault that I couldn't take a hint. I'm so sorry." You gushed out and tears started to fall from your eyes. You felt James get up from your bed and you prepared him to leave but instead you felt arms wrap around you and a kiss came to your head.

"Y/N I have had feelings for you for years. I was just always too scared for myself to even consider that you might feel the same." He whispered out but you felt only a different kind of pain. Even though he had now admitted his feelings, he was still dating Lily. Not you. Almost as if he could hear your thoughts he spoke quietly. "I broke it off with Evans." You pulled away immediately.

"What? Why would you do that?" You asked quickly and before he had a chance to answer you feared the worst. "Oh god is it because of me? James please dont let my feelings have any bearing on who you want to date, I can't stand the thought of being the reason you broke up. Even if we do have feelings for each other, you deserve a chance with Lily if that's what you want."

"It was mutual, actually. She understood that I had feelings for you and she said she had a crush on someone else. It just seemed like I had kissed her a bit rashly on the quidditch pitch and we agreed that we shouldn't have gotten together in the first place. It was only a day anyway." He reassured as he explained himself and you calmed a bit.

"So what does this mean." You got out, almost inaudibly.

"It means that, if you'll have me, I'd like to take you out on a date." He stated as if it were the simplest thing in the world and you almost couldn't believe your ears. Before you were even thinking you were nodding quickly, causing spots to once again fill your vision and James grabbed your shoulders to stabilize you before you both laughed. He pulled you by your shoulders toward him and he caught your lips in a kiss that somehow expressed all of the years of repressed feelings. When he pulled away he smiled at you and sat back on your bed. He spent the rest of the day with you in the hospital wing talking about all of the places he was going to take you in the coming weeks.

#harry potter imagine #harry potter x reader #hp imagine #hp x reader #the marauders #marauders imagine #marauders x reader #marauders era #james potter #james potter x reader #james potter imagine #james potter fluff #harry potter fluff #james potter angst #hp angst #hp fluff

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batsplat · 22 days ago

Note

OOH do you have any old motogp forum recs?? I would love to see what fans were saying in like the early 2000s, but I have no idea where to look

lemme check my bookmarks... r1-forum I've gone through a fair bit, threads dating back to early 2004. motogpforum goes back to early 2005. motorsportsforum picks up late 2006-ish, that one I've gone through in its entirety for the early alien era. motorradonline24 is admittedly in german but has the BIG selling point that it goes all the way back to 2001. apriliaforum also goes pretty far back but it takes a little longer for discussion of actual racing to get going. there's definitely more I've checked out - I might make a proper list at some point, but just to start you off

the thing about these forums is that it's undoubtedly interesting and useful to get some context of fan opinions (good mix of actual nuance/worthwhile discussion and just slagging off a bunch of riders)... but if anything they're even more precious as a record of actual *news* that has otherwise been scrubbed from the internet. there's a lot of drama and controversies and anecdotes that only exist on these forums

which... tbh there's been quite a few that I haven't included in my posts just because I'm not entirely sure they quite pass the burden of proof requirements. but man, so many of them are so interesting. it's a tricky balance. just as an example - one particularly nasty thing casey allegedly said about jorge that IF TRUE does feel like it would add something to my understanding of casey. but the article only exists on forum pages... still, it made it to three different forums I can find and is written in the usual tone of the author, so I feel fairly confident the original article existed. but then again, the article itself is just an anecdotal conversation relayed by one bloke. on the other hand, this is a reputable enough commentator you wouldn't expect to COMPLETELY make it up - and funnily enough I have even found a photo of him talking to casey that specific weekend. on the other other hand, it's a colourful anecdote that might have been exaggerated for effect. then again, I can kinda see casey saying it - not least because casey confirmed in his autobiography years later that he was pissed off at jorge that specific weekend. but it does feel like the sort of thing that should have caused a controversy... like if jorge saw what casey allegedly said you'd expect there to be nuclear winter, and there's no further trace of it. hm

so what do you do with that kind of thing, share it or not? the further you go back with this stuff the worse it gets, where I keep finding - plus am being sent - increasingly wild quotes from early noughties motogp. at least most of those are from news sites, some of them of dubious quality, but generally you'd really like to find at least one other source backing up the quotes. which often you won't get!! so yeah, it's all interesting context and gossip, but as ever I'd advise being wary of the specific stories. even the funny ones. especially the funny one

anyway, all that being said. this ask was sent in relation to a post about laguna 2008, so I'm going to take this excuse to actually share some discussion of laguna 2008

so. taking u through the fan chat of the weekend from one specific forum with select commentary... here's the thread starter

reminder that dani was injured at the sachsenring and would eventually opt against racing (effectively ending his title bid, but michelin was useless anyway that weekend)

relatively good reason to believe in english-speaker (and in particular american) overperformance at the track. obviously hayden won there the first two years, edwards even beat valentino to second in 2005 which has got to be the only time that year he finished ahead of vale. often more familiar with the track, or it just suits their riding style better. and ofc vermeulen did bag a distant third. still. valentino in the trenches if people thing edwards will beat him icl

have to say. the idea of the 125/250 riders going down that corkscrew fills me with a visceral sense of horror

'marco' btw as in marco melandri, in the middle of his ducati season from hell

dovi super popular in 2008 fyi, darling of the posters. everyone was obsessed with his rookie season

plenty of solid foreshadowing happening here you have to say

it is very motogp rider behaviour, and also very valentino behaviour, to look at the corkscrew, go 'hm i don't think this is even safe to WALK down', and then fucking hurl yourself at the other guy into that very same corner as you're both travelling at horrifying speeds on a motorcycle. going tentatively through that bit of the track during practise and then in the race he's making his bike go bounce bounce like a trampoline

wow!

*stares at camera*

still nasty work to say this, he repeated it in several interviews I think

okay, no forum posts during the race itself so now we skip to the post-race discussion

which is what the tone from a lot of posters was like

narrator: casey had not calmed down

(if you watch the podium ceremony and see some of the photos without context, you WOULD think they're having a laff. it's just that they're having a laff while casey is telling valentino that he's lost respect for him and valentino is delighted)

two australians on the podium btw

jorge highside cameo

a lot of people were whinging about a lot of 800cc races being boring because a lot of them were. you can copy and paste much of what people are saying about racing these days, if you want to get an idea of the tone

casey fan writes in

again. cannot be stressed enough how casey very much had not calmed down. but that's the fun thing about that rivalry, like they will ALWAYS have a tonal mismatch between their face-to-face interactions and whatever out of pocket things are being said in the press. casey also really big on the pissed off smile which helps

'not even sure that the riders even touched at any point' is. pushing it

yeah the no handshake thing really didn't get a positive response (casey did ofc eventually shake valentino's hand on the podium)

is it really a clean battle if you think someone will fall off

don't want to say that it's a lost cause because casey DID get smarter about this stuff, but ducati certainly aren't doing shit

so much of laguna and its legacy is about both of them threatening each other lol, please allow him

again, podium chat categorically not a friendly conversation. otherwise qualified casey defence

likewise

thought this was interesting in terms of discussion of actual rules - valentino said a few years ago the move wouldn't be allowed anymore and he thinks that's a good thing

“It needs rules,” he said. .”Because the situation with the overtaking manoeuvers and everything is much more extreme now than it was in Laguna Seca in 2008. The routes have changed a lot, now there is no more grass next to the slope, but the green stripe. “That was done for safety. Because if you catch the grass at that speed, you'll fly away. The asphalt, on the other hand, is less dangerous. In my opinion, however, you have to make a rule and say that you shouldn't touch the green at all - see it as if there were still grass there. “At the level we have reached today, which is extreme in many respects, everyone goes over the curbs and is all green if you don't have a clear rule. I think that's the right thing to do.”

but yeah tbh... I know casey disagrees but I feel like the move WAS probably fine by standards of back then

some more rules chat

and more

"will be hearing big footsteps every time he is in front"

and here we are then. not much that's groundbreaking, but I do find it interesting!! this is a pretty pro-casey audience... most of these forums were generally pretty positive about him. english language speakers were way more hostile towards dani and later jorge for various reasons - you'll also find at least some distaste for valentino in these spaces alongside the usual adulation. so that's the yardstick... this is probably close to as casey-friendly as discussion of the race got among the wider fanbase. it was always going to be a tough sell to air his grievances about this race until a few years had passed. the general reaction was that the racing had been hard but fine, an extremely welcome contrast to the general quality of racing at the time. and almost nobody thought casey should have reacted as he did in parc fermé. interesting contrast with jerez 2005 actually (though admittedly sete not particularly popular in most forums) - sete was low key seen as having a more legitimate grievance than casey. anyway, obviously this blog's stance is that sportsmanship is overrated, but that's how you end up getting the poor bloke apologising in brno

#i did recently find an actual clip of an actual interview valentino did qatar 2004 that i could verify with my very own eyes #which was very exciting. but that kind of thing is winning the lottery of motogp archival research. just won't happen every day #//#brr brr #batsplat responds #heretic tag #the rider for whomst fan perceptions have done a most radical 180 is definitely dani. pretty widely hated back in the day #admittedly that'll be exaggerated in english forum threads - presumably lots of americans there who obviously loathed him #is quite funny seeing casey write about the us fans' pure love for racing like buddy u do know they're just booing someone else right??

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viktoriakomova · 2 years ago

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and think about 10+ years ago when “influencing” wasn’t even a thing. Nastia and Shawn are lucky that they were successful enough individually (ie notable enough as Olympic champions without the “team” designation tacked onto it and thus individually marketable for years afterward as 2 of the Team USA [overall, all sports] stars) and had that elite status as stars in a Team USA marquee sport already 1 year before the Olympics so they could be in all the huge commercial spots in the lead up to 2008. AND that they struck a lucky spot temporally where they made a big enough splash to be remembered well enough in the mid-2010s to have a big social media following.

ASAC (smartly!) saved her eligibility for NCAA, did a season at Brown (an ivy league which I guaran-fucking-tee you she wouldn’t have been admitted to if she werent an athlete), didn’t like it and came back to elite, made the olympics in 2008, didn’t win an individual medal in beijing, took a break and came back to elite after a years break, returned to the elite level and won an individual world title. then a year later got hurt, recovered and competed at olympic trials in 2012, and didn’t even make alternate. her status as an Olympian has gotten her the commentary gig with ESPN that she has now, regardless of merit (in the sense that someone as good as her or even better wouldn’t have been hired if they were on the US national team and werent an Olympian. even a world championship gold isn’t worth as much as having been to the Olympics). don’t @ me

it’s like your 3 career paths are a) commentator/sports media, if you’re charismatic and savvy enough; b) influencer, if you’re popular and hot pretty enough; or c) a coach (no matter what level).

And I don’t mean to shit on coaching as a profession. The point I’m trying to make is that the options are so limited as far as career paths go, especially when you have no college degree. Until 2 (!!!) years ago, gymnasts weren’t even allowed to compete in NCAA and capitalize off their popularity at the same time. I hope the NIL rules change this whole dynamic, even a little. But… where does that leave the ones who came before them?

Think about Vanessa Atler ffs. She did a big Reeses commercial and a few minor endorsements riding the post-1996 wave of gymnastics popularity in the US, and despite her tremendous talent and likeability ended up not making the Olympics in 2000 at all. It’s been 22 years, she’s a regular adult who is a mom and is working as a coach (last I checked), and has come a long way in terms of unpacking all that happened before she was a fully independent adult, but not 100% of it, I’m sure she’d say if you asked her.

And these are just the big name elites. Think about the ratio of the number girls whose names we all know, the stars of elite or even the cream of the L10 crop, to the number of gymnasts who fell short but experienced the same treatment, made the same sacrifices, and have the same literal and figurative scars. They’ve all suffered this way, to some extent, and for what?

Also (this is NOT me calling her or anyone dumb lemme be clear) the educational neglect that’s practically encouraged by elite gymnastics as a subculture is absolutely conducive to this. Especially the ones who don’t end up doing NCAA. You’re churning out dozens of undereducated young adults, with awful social skills vis-à-vis their normie peers, who are intense and one-track-minded and have no practical work force skills or reasonably “hirable” credentials, and you’ve encouraged them to make gymnastics their one and only medium of identity and self expression, and one day they aren’t gymnasts anymore and they have to get a big girl job and navigate the adult world and that’s like figuratively driving them off a cliff into the ocean below at 100mph. It’s a miracle that ANY of them managed to become relatively well adjusted adults honestly...

#even the ones who did ncaa and graduated with a bachelors. they know they’re well behind their peers. the gulf in edu preparation is obvious #imagine what that does to ur self esteem. knowing u were a phenom in gym then coping with being below the median academically #bc u were homeschooled from fucking 3rd grade until u ‘graduated’ high school bc u maybe possibly couldve been an olympian #there are 5 and 3 alternates every 4 years [asterisk tokyo] and how many hundreds try and fail to be one of those 8?

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bokunoheroanalysisforthefuture · 3 years ago

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Last chapter of this volume! Can’t believe we’re already through four volumes, and we’re not even done with the second full arc yet. I mean, later arcs are gonna be even longer, but like. Yeah.

[No. 35 - Battle On, Challengers!]

We move on to the next match - Kaminari versus Shiozaki! I’m actually kind of marveled that they were able to thaw out that entire glacier in any sort of timely manner. That’s quirks for you!

Present Mic announces Shiozaki as class 1b’s assassin, and also reveals that he apparently either doesn’t know the full quote for ‘every rose has its thorns’ or started to say it, only to realize she didn’t have roses and scrambled to compensate. Kaminari, meanwhile, gets announced as a ‘sparking, killing boy.’ Really kind of morbid on this round, huh?

Shiozaki turns around to object to Present Mic’s descriptor as an ‘assassin’, stating that she’s merely come this far seeking victory. Present Mic apologises, and Kaminari just kind of watches while admiring her. He takes notes of her eyes, and then thinks about how strong she is. He then sort of counters his previous admiration of strength by asking himself if he really has to hit someone so pretty with a full discharge, then concludes his ‘battle plan’ by determining that he’ll ask her out once all this is over.

Present Mic starts the match while Shiozaki is still focused on talking to Mic - which means she’s facing away from Kaminari. Which is kind of a dick move on Mic’s part, but eh, I guess ‘heroes have to be ready for anything,’ yarda yarda etcetera.

Kaminari asks Shiozaki if she wants to grab something to eat when they’re done there, and that he’s happy to console her if she wants. She turns to stare at him in confusion, just in time to see him charging up his whole body with his quirk. Kaminari makes a quip about this match probably being over in an instant - and then we cut to the immediate aftermath, where Present Mic comments on how it’s already over while Kaminari wheys out in the grasp of Shiozaki’s vines. Shiozaki was both able to create a shield against the electricity and yank Kaminari into the air and away from her, thus causing him to short-circuit.

One on patrol, Mount Lady comments on Shiozaki being a promising one, and another plant user. Kamui Woods amits he wishes he could’ve seen her up close, but that they need to get back to work.

Back in the stadium, Midnight announces Shiozaki moving on to the second round. Shiozaki is relieved to have no wasted the opportunity bestowed upon her, and the narrative finally gives us an informational blurb on her quirk.

...A strange ending note there, but sure. Some of the crowd - or possibly Izuku? Since he’s sinking into a muttering fest right after - comments on the ‘match’ and the participants. Shiozaki’s ability to use her quirk is something else, between building walls, binding enemies… Kaminari’s quirk was no use against her. She countered him well. He might’ve had a chance if he could maneuver better, but he panicked and short-circuited after one attack.

Ochako hears muttering besides her and is a bit alarmed, looking over to see Izuku in the middle of an analysis fugue. Izuku mutters about thinking Kaminari’s quirk would be stronger, but Shiozaki got fourth in the entrance exam, and she’s the real deal. The vine moves are similar to Kamui Wood’s binding attacks, and binding types are always strong, to the point where you almost never see someone break out. It’s pretty much impossible to dodge all the vine attacks, so the only counter is to rip them apart with brute strength - ah, but to prevent that, they tend to go for the hands first.

(...and I just NOW realized that this specific commentary about binding-type quirks and the counter being brute strength is literally something that comes into play when Best Jeanist binds Gigantomachia with those steel cables during the Jakku arc. Holy shit, I don’t think Hori intended it, but what a callback. Or it’s just good worldbuilding, which would also be neat!)

Ochako eventually cuts into Izuku’s muttering - startling him in the process - by commenting on how his match just ended, but he’s already thinking ahead strategy-wise. Izuku denies it, saying that it’s just a hobby of his, and that they finally have a chance to see the quirks of people outside their class in action. He then eagerly shows her his open notebook, stating that he has everything she’d need to know about class A in there - even her ‘zero gravity’.

Me, staring down the people who have the class unaware of the contents of Izuku’s notebooks when writing suspected traitor fics:

Anyways! Ochako is kind of impressed despite herself, stating that she thought Izuku was amazing from the day they met, but this sports festival has brought him to a whole other level. Izuku is confused by the complement, but there’s no time to ask, since Present Mic is announcing the participants of the next battle: Tenya versus Hatsume.

Some of the students are chattering about how the match is going to go, with one asking what is that - which seems to be referring to the support items Tenya is wearing? Midnight comments on it as well, noting that they’re forbidden for hero course students, and that a special request has to be put in for those things beforehand. Tenya admits he forgot, seeing as Aoyama was wearing that belt of his. Midnight reminds him that Aoyama applied for an exception.

Tenya apologies, stating that he’d been touched by Hatsuma’s sense of sportsmanship. Although she’s a member of the support course, she came to him and said that if they’re to be seen as equals, then they should fight on equal footing. She gave those items to him; her earnest spirit… he could never look down on it. That was his thinking.

Midnight apparently is now all for this, calling Tenya naive. Mic says that it’s good enough for him, and Aizawa says that if both parties are fine with it, he supposes it can be allowed… right? Izuku, up in the stands, is looking concerned, wondering if Hatsume is really the type to offer that. Hatsume, of course, is chuckling as she flips down a microphone right as the match starts.

Mei immediately starts going into her spiel, commenting on Tenya’s speed - much to the confusion of both Mic and Tenya. She then points out how Tenya’s legs should feel lighter than usual, and that that’s what one can expect with her custom leg parts, which keep up with their user’s speed! However, dodging is no problem for her with her hydraulic attachment bars! Which she deploys just before Tenya reaches her, causing him to trip over one of the bars and flail.

Mei checks for where the support companies were seated, her quirk zeroing in on the faces she’s looking for - which, to her pleasure, are eating her words up.

Tenya catches himself and spins on his heels, wondering what she’s going. Hatsume complements it, noting how her auto-balancer makes those sorts of tight movements possible. Meanwhile, up in the announcement booth, Mic and Aizawa are both so put out, with Aizawa facepalming and calling her a born saleswoman.

The game of tag, along with a completely play-by-play sales pitch, goes on for another ten minutes. Eventually, however, Hatsume steps over the line, sweating but proud of managing to get through everything she wants to show off. Midnight states that Tenya’s moving on to the second round, while Tenya is just in despair at the deception.

Ah, the face of someone with zero shame. Hatsume gives a completely insincere apology for using Tenya, which Tenya replies to by stating his extreme dislike of her.

Izuku is also a bit dismayed as he notes that Tenya is just too serious, so it wasn’t hard for her to get him to play her game, and that at least she’s honest about her under-handed methods to get what she wants. Ochako herself is looking a bit down as she gets up, quietly noting to Izuku that she should get to the prep room. Izuku notes that she left her still-full drink behind, glancing back to her in concern as she walks away.

As other matches run in the background, we shift over to prep room two, which Tenya is just entering. Ochako, already waiting in there, tells him good which, which startles him out of his funk as he recognizes her. Of course, the first thing he notes is her furrowed brows, which Ochako admits is probably from her being a bit nervous, and how it’s probably showing on her face. Tenya remembers her match is against Katsuki, and Ochako admits that she’s really scared. But, seeing Tenya out there, she…

Well, before she can finish her thought, Izuku bursts into the room. Ochako is confused, since he should be out there watching the other matches. Tenya to the side asks about the story behind the support girl. Izuku ignores the latter, telling Ochako that another two matches are already over, and now Kirishima and some class 1b guy are duking it out. Mina managed to damage Aoyama’s belt, he panicked, and she knocked him out with an uppercut to the chin. Then Tokoyami won his match in a flash - he didn’t give Momo the time to use the objects she made… he’s one of the strongest guys here in a one-on-one. Ochako realizes this means her match is up soon, her heart pounding in her chest.

Tenya can’t imagine that Katsuki would give it his explosive all against a female opponent, but Izuku cuts in, staring very firmly that Katsuki will. Everyone is competing here with the dream of becoming number one. No one’s holding back - Katsuki least of all. However, Ochako’s already helped Izuku so much, so he thought he might return the favor…

He really just stores his notebooks anywhere he can. What a legend. He offers the notebook, stating that Ochako needs a counter-strategy against Katsuki - one that uses her quirk. He came up with it on the fly, but it might work! Tenya is relief, stating how fortunate Ochako is. Ochako thanks Izuku, but says that it’s okay. Both Izuku and Tenya are startled by the reply.

Ochako states how amazing Izuku is, and how he does amazing stuff all the time. During the cavalry battle, she thought the easiest strategy woul be to team up with friends. But when she thinks about it, she was just putting her faith in Izuku. That’s why Tenya said ‘I challenge you’ and all that, which left her feeling a little embarrassed about herself.

She pushes herself to her feet, moving past them to get to her match as she says thanks, but no thanks. Everyone here is fighting for their futures, so doesn’t that make them all rivals? That’s why she’ll see him in the finals!

Ochako, sweetie…

Kirishima and Tetsutetsu knock each other out at the same time. Present Mic comments on the mirror image quirk matchup, and how the winner is… neither! They have a tie, since both are down. Midnight clarifies that in the event of a tie, they’ll determine the winner after the two recover, probably with an arm wrestling match or the like. The crowds comment on how they’re equal in strength, and how that was great though. They kind of hotbloodedness would be a great morale boost, and how they’re desirable as sidekicks.

Shouto watches on as the final two contestants of the first round enter the arena. Tsuyu states her worries about the match, and Jirou addson how she doesn’t want to watch it. Izuku quietly hopes for Ochako to do her best.

And so the final match is announced: Ochako versus Katsuki.

And with that, volume four is done! I’ll be getting up the character sheet first, and then digging into the bonus material. Hopefully y’all enjoy!

#chapter 35 #sports festival arc #readthrough #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #midoriya izuku #Iida Tenya #uraraka ochako #kayama nemuri #aizawa shouta #yamada hizashi #Hatsume Mei #Kaminari Denki #shiozaki ibara #not related to this post or anything #but happy birthday tenya #what a good bean #he gets so betrayed in this chapter

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absynthe--minded · 4 years ago

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Beren, the Nauglamír, and Editorial Oversight

this is gonna be a long one, guys.

so one of the things that makes Christopher Tolkien’s contributions to the greater legacy of the Tolkien Legendarium so complex is that he, as the posthumous editor of his father’s works, essentially was able to declare what is or isn’t “canon” in a way that no amount of scholarship (fannish or professional) will be able to truly successfully challenge. it’s his vision of Arda that was published as the Silmarillion, and his interpretations of the Professor’s works that have come to act as the standard and the baseline. after all, the Silm’s been traditionally published and translated into many languages; it’s far more accessible than out-of-print/print-on-demand copies of the History, and reading it doesn’t require you to slog through pages and pages of commentary or to have a good solid understanding of what the story is so you can follow along with lists of bullet points outlining events timeline-style.

of course, Chris also made mistakes, and those mistakes became enshrined in canon just as surely as anything else. I and many others have discussed the Gil-galad problem (namely, that Gil-galad’s parentage is oblique and strange at best and downright contradictory at worst, and Christopher’s choice to make him Fingon’s son was an admitted error) but it’s not the only case of a decision later proving to be the wrong one.

with that background, let’s talk about Beren.

Beren and Lúthien are in an unusual position in the Legendarium as a whole. Not only are they the sole author-insert characters, they’re also uniquely positioned as moral compasses - every other person in the Silm is morally ambiguous to some degree, or does bad or questionable things; not so with these two. If Beren or Lúthien does something, it’s explicitly the right thing to do, and this is confirmed by the narrative. If someone else opposes them, that is the wrong course of action. They’re not merely protagonists who make a lot of good choices, they’re good people, and the things they do are right because of their moral fiber and nobility. Of the active agents who are developed to any great degree, they’re the least complex and the most clear-cut, and the narrative itself treats them differently from other characters, validating them and framing them as the sort of spotless heroes that are in short supply in this Age.

This characterization runs headlong into the actions Beren takes in early drafts of the story and in the published Silm, where after dwarves kill Thingol and sack Menegroth, Beren (with the help of some allies, usually either Green-elves or Ents) ambushes them and duels the Lord of Nogrod for possession of the Nauglamír, a necklace originally owned by Finrod in Nargothrond that Húrin brought to Doriath after his release from Angband. Thingol commissioned dwarven artisans to alter the piece and create a setting in it for the Silmaril that Beren and Lúthien had won for him from Morgoth, and there was a dispute about payment that escalated to violence and ended in his death at dwarvish hands. The battle, later called the Battle of the Thousand Caves, was more or less a victory for dwarvish forces, as they escaped both with the Nauglamír and several other treasures from Menegroth and they defeated Sindarin forces that set out to stop them.

In most versions of the story, Melian sends Mablung to Ossiriand to warn Beren and Lúthien of what’s happened, and essentially asks them to do something to stop the retreating dwarvish forces from reaching Nogrod, where they came from. Beren does this, killing the Lord of Nogrod himself and taking the Nauglamír and the Silmaril home to Lúthien, who then gives it to Dior, who takes it back to Doriath when he takes the throne there. This is the version of the tale that’s in the published Silmarillion, and the one that’s consistent throughout the earlier drafts that Tolkien himself wrote.

But it’s not the only version that exists.

In The War of the Jewels, which compiles versions of the story written late in Tolkien’s life, we find The Tale of Years. This is not a cohesive narrative, instead functioning (like many of the writings that make up the bulk of the History of Middle-Earth) rather like a series of bullet points mentioning and summarizing key events. It progresses chronologically, giving a sense of passing time and organization to the First Age, and it has this to say about the Nauglamír and the battle at Sarn Athrad:

“The Dwarves of Belegost and Nogrod invade Doriath. King Elu Thingol is slain and his realm ended. Melian escapes and carries away the Nauglamír and the Silmaril, and brings them to Beren and Lúthien. She then forsook Middle-earth and returned to Valinor.

Curufin and Celegorm, hearing of the sack of Menegroth, ambushed the Dwarves at the Fords of Ascar as they sought to carry off the Dragon-gold to the mountains. The Dwarves were defeated with great loss, but they cast the gold into the river, which was therefore after named Rathlóriel. Great was the anger of the sons of Fëanor to discover that the Silmaril was not with the Dwarves; but they dared not to assail Lúthien. Dior goes to Doriath and endeavours to recover the realm of Thingol.”

(This quote is taken from the latest and typed version of the Tale of Years, an earlier handwritten version exists that is shorter but includes the same relevant details.)

Christopher Tolkien elected not to use this version of events, instead choosing to maintain the earlier tale where Beren had an active role; he was never truly satisfied with this, or with the Ruin of Doriath as a whole. In the commentary to the Tale of Years he wrote that “It seemed at that time that there were elements inherent in the story of the Ruin of Doriath as it stood that were radically incompatible with ‘The Silmarillion’ as projected, and that there was here an inescapable choice: either to abandon that conception, or else to alter the story. I think now that this was a mistaken view, and that the undoubted difficulties could have been, and should have been, surmounted without so far overstepping the bounds of the editorial function.” We have, for a second time, an admission of error, though unlike the Gil-galad question there is not a specific choice singled out as a flaw.

Why am I talking about this? Well, simply, I think that the version of the story where Celegorm and Curufin attack the Dwarvish host is the one that makes the most sense, and I’m here to make my case for its adoption as fanon. I’m not trying to take a purely scholarly view - I can’t prove that Tolkien’s true vision was for this version of the text, and of course it’s only in the one draft - but as a fandom we’ve reached the consensus before that specific versions of the story are preferred, even when they only appear in a single draft (Amrod’s death at Losgar stands out as the best example).

So here’s my argument.

1. Beren is not a violent man, and having him act as a murderer is out of character.

This one is pretty simple - Beren is an outlaw fighting against Sauron, a defender of his family’s land, a nobleman in his own right, and a vegetarian who is keenly aware of what it is to be hunted and pursued. The man we’re introduced to in the other versions of the story is not someone who would answer violence with violence unless there was no other choice, and in fact he becomes less violent as the story goes on. Putting him in a position where he’s acting militarily against the Dwarves introduces elements to his character that simply don’t exist before this story. It’s inconsistent, and it also ends his life on a strange, sour note - he’s not an uncomplicated hero anymore, he’s also got blood on his hands.

2. Beren is one of the moral compasses of the Silmarillion, and having him be the one to spearhead the ambush of the Dwarves frames that act of violence in a very troubling light.

Like I said above, Beren and Lúthien are good people who do good things, and those things are good because of who’s doing them. If Beren kills the Dwarves and the Lord of Nogrod, that act becomes justifiable, and perhaps even the right thing to do, simply due to the fact that one of the two true heroes of the First Age is doing it. The narrative never frames this as a downfall or a moral event horizon for Beren, either - he made the correct decision and the consequences that come afterward aren’t things that can be blamed on him. But wholesale slaughter, even slaughter of people who do bad things, is not something Tolkien ever condones or paints in a truly positive light, so it makes more sense for it to come at the hands of people who aren’t solely positive forces. It’s thematically in line with what Tolkien does through the rest of the text, and it feels more like Arda, at least to me. I think an argument could be made that Tolkien realized that making Celegorm and Curufin the responsible party would achieve this end, and that’s why this version exists in the first place, but there’s no proof of it.

3. The Laiquendi are nonviolent, and it makes no sense for them to be involved in this fight. The Ents being involved at all is somewhat nonsensical based on what we know of them in The Lord of the Rings.

Another simple one - we don’t know much about the Laiquendi, but we know they’re not really keen on warfare or on any undue violence, so having them be Beren’s backup is a weird divergence from their presentation in the rest of the Legendarium. And the Ents are pretty universally depicted as uninvested in the wars of the incarnates, only taking action against Saruman when it becomes apparent they have no other choice - why should they care about Thingol’s death, or care enough to murder dwarves?

4. Melian’s actions make far more sense in a version of the story where she doesn’t merely abandon Doriath once she realizes Thingol is dead.

If Menegroth is already sacked, and she cannot hold the realm together on her own as its Queen without really fucking shit up with reality-warping shadow magic, her choice to abandon it after delivering the Silmaril safely to her daughter and warning her that Dior will be needed soon is far less irresponsible.

5. Celegorm and Curufin ambushing the dwarves makes more sense than any other alternative.

Of course Celegorm and Curufin were actively watching Doriath for any sign of weakness. Of course they noticed the dwarves leaving with stolen treasures, and heard rumors that Thingol was dead and his killers had the Silmaril. Given the choice of following Melian (if they even were aware of Melian’s departure) and following dwarves, of course they picked the dwarves. Their ambush and attack and slaughter is consistent with their past behavior, as is their refusal to attack Lúthien because they were scared as fuck of her.

What’s more, this also explains the Fëanorians’ refusal to attack Doriath immediately after the dwarves do - they were unsure of whether or not Lúthien was in Menegroth and ruling as its queen or acting in some capacity as Dior’s defender. Celegorm in particular isn’t the type to hesitate - he’s impulsive, and rash, and rushes into bad decisions without considering their consequences, it’s even in his name. But they waited for years, giving Dior time to marry and have children of his own, and then even sent letters rather than attack directly - and yes, some of this might have been Maedhros’s influence, or an attempt by all of them to stave off the Oath, but it’s also plausible that they were trying to figure out whether or not they’d have to take on the same woman who made fools of them before.

I, at least, think this version of the story makes the most sense, and I’ll be adopting it into my personal canon. I obviously think it’s worth advocating for on a larger scale, and I hope I’ve made a good argument for its widespread adoption.

#silmarillion meta #silmarillion #tolkien #absynthe's meta #beren and luthien

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nautiscarader · 4 years ago

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2020 in animation - recap

So, 2020.

Yeah, I have to say I’m not entirely satisfied. Would not recommend, 1 star.

But I would be willing to bump it to 1.5, if only because of one factor: the animation.

Because I have to say, this was the best animated end of the world so far! And if there was something that kept our spirits up, it was the cartoon industry!

Just like last year, I should preface this by saying that this is highly subjective selection. Even when one is confined to their Hobbit holes for better part of the year because of *waves hands* everything around,

day still only has 24 hours, so I have missed a few shows. (I should also apologise for omitting a few major ones last year, like Milo Murphy’s Law S2, Ducktales, or She-Ra. This is why I started keeping a track this year). I’m sure I will catch up with those I missed this year some time in the future, but for now, let’s see what this year has gifted us with.

And right from the start, January opens the race with very interesting propositions. We were still riding on an incredibly high wave from last year, with Infinity Train season 2.

This one focused on Tulip’s mirror, and pushed the season towards a much darker and complex story, diving deep into one’s personal journey and identity. There were tears, math, deer, and cops being murdered. Brutally.

t was followed by two newcomers: The Owl House and first season of Kipo and The Age of the Wonderbeast. Both of them would dominate first half of the year, with The Owl House’s traditional, week-to-week airings, and Kipo's seasons appearing in June and October.

The Owl House, a strong contender in "What will be the Next Gravity Falls?" contest, invited us to a world full of magic, mystery, elongated owl demons and some dark secrets. It has also created a milestone for Disney, introducing an LGBT couple with characters of bisexual Luz Noceda and lesbian Amity Blight. Their Grom dance has risen to the top of my animates scenes, polling very closely to the unforgettable Kataango.

On the other hand, Kipo has taken us to the post-apocalyptic world filled with mutant animals, revealing that despite the end of the world, our old vices and animosities have survived in underground burrows, and we have infected the overworld of giant doggos and suit-wearing frogs with them.

Kipo did not pull any punches regarding commentary about our society, at the same time giving us hope in the form of the main protagonist, who was able to spread friendship and understanding amongst the mutes, as well as the humans that had to survive. And in the world that we have found ourselves in, it was a pretty darn good lesson.

February would bring end to two seasons of airing cartoons, Big Hero Six season 2 and Miraculous season 3, as well as another newcomer that won the hearts of fans: Glitch Techs, with its "second" season arriving in August. And while in my opinion he show wasn't as good as the other two new titles, I am clearly in minority, as the show about Ghostbuters-like team of game console technicians gained huge popularity... though not enough to keep the show afloat. As of writing this, it is currently in limbo, which is a shame, as the second set of 10 episodes finally added some much needed ongoing story.

in March, another show from last year ended - Steven Universe Future. As we have expected, it tackled slightly more mature themes, showing how much Steven needed that therapy we have wished him, telling an important tale of finding one's worth and one's self. its ending might not have been as explosive as those of the original show, or the movie, but it left Steven’s story as open as an open road, and deep in our hearts, we all knew it would look like this.

March was also the time when majority of western world caught the coronavirus, and that caused quite a turmoil with the movie and animation industry. One of the first victim of changed schedule was Disney's Onward, which was released on-line on Disney+ quickly after its theatrical release.

I have mixed feelings towards “Onward”. For such interesting promise, I think it made a few questionable and down right boring turns, though the unorthodox message at the end of it was its strongest point, and it was one I haven’t seen in a while, so it was worth watching just for that.

April was relatively quiet (aside from more end of the world stuff); brought us third season of Ducktales that spread throughout the year, while May gave us final, fifth season of She-Ra and the Princesses of Power.

To my eternal shame, I missed on this show when it premiered, and due to the lockdown, I binge-watched the previous four right in time for powerful and explosive season 5. And even though Catra and Adora finally gave us exactly what we needed, some fans felt slightly unsatisfied, calling for a movie, like the Steven Universe one to be made. And I’d be all for it, the rest of universe needs saving from the Horde! Also, cats in space - hilarious.

May also revealed a new player on the streaming field: HBO Max, who surprised us with new Looney Tunes Cartoons, much more in the spirit of the legendary originals than the often-criticised Looney Tunes Show from 2011-2014. And in my opinion, it did; one could feel the same fluidity in animation, dedication to slapstick, and synchronisation with music than in the very first cartoons with Bugs and Daffy.

HBO Max would, however, return in June with first of series of Adventure Time original movies called "Distant Lands". The first centred around BMO, with second one - Obsidian giving us a glimpse into Bonnibel and Marceline's lives.

Distant Lands allowed people to revisit the odd, odd world of Ooo and learn about its colourful inhabitants, taking turns to seeing their past and the future, an, as usual, showing us that post-apocalyptic world can teach us valuable and meaningful lessons.

Just in time for full lockdown in our burrows, aforementioned Kipo season 2 premiered in June, together with another cartoon movie, this time featuring We Bare Bears. While their movie wasn't anything to write songs about, it was exactly like the show, providing some wholesome content right when we needed it.

And just in case you needed more wholesome adventures, Craig of the Creek's second season ended, and its third season began, reminding us of HOW COOL LIFE WAS WHEN OUTERNET WASN’T SCARY AND WE COULD STILL WALK OUTSIDE FOR FUN AND NOT TO HUNT TOILET PAPER.

Just like last year, July was not dogs' days, but frogs'. Amphibia season 2 started raining on our heads, but unlike last year, its schedule wasn't a daily one, spreading the episodes throughout the Summer and early Autumn, with its second part arriving in February of 2021. There were more roadtrips, more mysteries and MORE MARCY.

August was equally strong: aforementioned Glitch Techs "season 2" premiered, offering better and more plot-heavy episodes than the first ten episodes. Unfortunately, the show's future is unclear; the uneven divide of plot between the seasons probably contributed to the show not being renewed. 10 new episodes apparently are written, but await in sleep mode, until Nickelodeon remembers about it.

HBO MAX picked up Infinity Train for its third season, after being derailed by Cartoon Network. And if you thought that killing a mirror cop was shocking... then this season has pushed the limit of what can be shown in modern children's cartoon to a frightening degree. The schedule was once again, weirder, with first five episodes airing on the day of the premiere, ending with a cliffhanger (literally) that only contributed to the shock factor and made us wait anxiously for its conclusion. It was bold, it was dark, it was memorable.

And just like Glitch Techs, Infinity Train waits on a side track, unsure if it will be picked up, or will it be abandoned and left as a canvas for graffiti artists.

However, to end the Summer, a truly amazing TV movie has arrived on Disney Plus, where we came back to good, old Danville and could witness Candace against the universe. The new Phineas and Ferb movie brought back the glorious memories of this fantastic show, with the same humour, writing, abundance of catchy songs and a surprisingly deep moral.

In September we have seen the start of Big Hero 6 season 3 and a odd change of format. Instead of standalone 22-minute episodes, the show now consists of two 11-minute segments. In opinion of many, this weakened the stories, forcing them to be more comedy-oriented, and shortening the potential emotional drama. Still, it gave us funny, short stories, but they did clash with the two previous season, not to mention the movie.

However, if that wasn't up to your taste, Ducktales season 3 also started airing, and continued its first part up until December with more action- and plot-driven episodes, including the Darkwing Duck crossover, serving as a pilot of the spin-off.

Later in December fans have learned that Season 3 will be its last, which broke the hearts of many duck fans; however, it seems that the season has been written as the last one in mind, and the news of the ending was known to the creators, which gives us hope for a kick-ass finale somewhere in 2021.

Miraculous New York, telling arguably one of the most mature storylines, opened the "Heroez" world to some new characters and new opportunities, with two more specials, taking place in Shanghai and Brazil, meant to air somewhere next year. AND I DO HOPE WE WILL SEE MORE LOCAL FOOD VENDOR SUPERHEROES LIKE HOT DOG DAN.

October was the month of two season 3's: Carmen Sandiego and Kipo. In case of Carmen, as it is usual with Netflix, the "season" was only a half-one, with just a handful standalone episodes, and just a dash of more ongoing plot.

For Kipo, however, season 3 was the end, and what a glorious one it was. Fans were saddened to learn of it, but Kipo was always imagined as a 3-part story, and it showed. The finale proved more than satisfying ending to the plot, elevating Kipo to one of the smartest cartoon characters we should all try to aspire to.

In November, Distant Lands: Obsidian aired, focusing on everyone’s favourite candy/vampire couple, and the long and complicated love between Bonnibel and Marceline. And as usual, it showed us that relationships are not always as straightforward as we would like them to be, but with enough music and teamwork, no enemy is big enough.

For the next new show, I’ve waited with the most amount of excitement and anxiety. Because while I was completely fine with other reboots and re-imaginings to take creative takes, new Animaniacs, (airing on Hulu) had to be perfect and had to be the lightning that struck twice.

And sadly... it wasn’t. It was still good, but some people criticised (incorrectly imho) the amount of political topics, while I mourned almost total cast-ration of additional characters, aside from Pinky and the Brain. This truly weakened the possibilities it could have had. It was still very good, but you can feel that some of the original charm was lost, due to these odd, odd limitations.

December brought us a new original Apple TV movie, Wolfwalkers. A beautifully animated folk tale of friendship and social divides, and how short-sight can cause the collapse of both arguing sides, reminding me very much of the intelligence and heart of original “How to Train Your Dragon”.

We’ve had to wait two years for the return of arguably one of the most wholesome shows out there: Hilda. Second season dived into deeper mysteries that permeate the rich and colourful troll-ridden land, we saw the return of some familiar characters, and introduced a whole new storyline, that ended with a surprising cliffhanger. Still as wholesome, but now with a tiny bit of Police incompetence. Also Twig, lots of Twig.

Just like Onward, Pixar’s highly anticipated Soul aired on Disney+, telling a very mature story about finding one’s purpose in life, what that purpose actually means, and whether it exists at all. Beautifully animated, with fantastic soundtrack, it was a stunning tribute to creativity, and it never dumbed down its profound, open message about following your dream.

And just if you thought that Soul was going to be 2020′s last note (pun very much intended), right before the year ended, DC Super Hero Girls concluded its first season on a rather anti-climactic two-parter. That being said, the season, running from March of last year, was packed with short, bite-sized, funny stories, taking interesting spins on existing comic book characters. For a comic book noob like me, it was perfectly fine, and I can’t wait for the second season next year.

And so, we have reached the series finale of humanity.

2020 ends in just under a day. What will 2021 bring us? I do not know, and if the animated shows of this year have taught me anything, is that the future is an always open book, full of worries and challenges, but also opportunities and possibilities.

...

And in reality I was too lazy to check any news sites about upcoming projects.

#infinity train #glitch techs #amphibia #kipo and the age of wonderbeasts #animaniacs #carmen sandiego #hilda #DuckTales #big hero 6 #distant lands #dc super hero girls #Miraculous Ladybug #spop #The Owl House

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kjack89 · 3 years ago

Text

An Agreement Between Gentlemen (Chapter 13/14)

When this Author picked up the mantle left behind by the previous Lady Whistledown, it was with the intention of bringing a little levity to the otherwise long and sometimes dull proceedings that encompass the season, and to provide some color commentary that pokes fun at those otherwise generally unwilling to make light of themselves.

To that end, this Author has remarked upon and highlighted the general scandals that accompany this season as every season, the kind that serve to provide some drama to otherwise dull lives, but risk very little in terms of lasting damage.

This Author has never intended for this to cause actual harm, and as such, owes an apology to the Marquess of Enjolras and Mr. Grantaire. This Author does not dabble in morals, or legality; the sole concern of this column has been amusement, and the ruin of two gentlemen otherwise described by most who have met them as good men is something this Author cannot and will not be a part of any longer. While this Author cannot overstate that there was no prior knowledge of the truth behind the Marquess’s marriage, nonetheless the extra attention shone on it by and through this paper has brought harm, and for that, this Author is truly sorry.

While no promises can be made in regards to accidentally reporting similar in the future, this Author will certainly make every attempt to better vet sources before publishing rumor and innuendo. And the promise this Author does make is that the only additional mention of the Marquess of Enjolras or Mr. Grantaire in this paper will be for happy tidings, with best hopes for whatever they may face in the future. LADY WHISTLEDOWN’S SOCIETY PAPERS, 6 JUNE 1831

The summons did not arrive with the usual fanfare, so much so that Enjolras almost missed them entirely.

No gilded envelope hand stamped with the King’s own seal, no scarlet-clad guard from the palace delivering it. Just a small, plain parchment envelope instructing Enjolras to attend to His Majesty the King the following day.

In truth, he very nearly almost missed it entirely, since Porter, who normally would have brought him such things, was confined to bed for the immediate future as he recovered – and the surgeon had been quite strict in his instructions. But Grantaire, far less used to having the number of servants Enjolras did, had seen it sitting on the table in the foyer and brought it into the dining room with him when he came in for breakfast.

“This is good news,” he told Grantaire after scanning through the note, though Grantaire didn’t look convinced.

“To be summoned in front of those with the power to strip you of your titles and lands and throw you in the Tower for the rest of your days, unless they decide to chop off your head instead?”

Enjolras rolled his eyes. “Better a meeting with the King and Queen than the constable,” he pointed out. “Besides, there’s a limit to what they can do, and if they’re intervening now, it will serve to prevent the worst from happening.” He stood to leave the breakfast table before pausing and bending to kiss the top of Grantaire’s head. “In any case, the usual death in this situation would be by hanging, not beheading.”

“Because that’s so comforting a thought,” Grantaire said sourly.

“It should be.”

Grantaire stared at him. “The thought of you being hanged instead of beheaded?”

Enjolras gave him a look. “No, that the King wants to meet with me. I’m not fool enough to think my death by anything other than old age would bring you any comfort.”

Grantaire pretended to consider it. “Going out in a blaze of glory as you attempt to bring the whole damned system to its knees might.”

“Only if you are by my side as proof that I have won you over in the end.”

Grantaire’s expression softened for a moment. “I would die by your side in an instant, but I don’t think that’s proof of anything.” He kissed Enjolras before returning to the subject at hand. “In any case, why should the King wanting to meet with you bring me any comfort whatsoever?”

“Because it means the Crown wants this handled quickly and quietly,” Enjolras said. “Meaning very likely no public trial, and almost certainly no public execution.”

“That would be more comforting without the qualifiers ‘very likely’ and ‘almost certainly’.”

Enjolras sighed. “There is very little in life that is absolutely certain besides death and taxes.”

Grantaire smirked. “And as I have heard you rail about numerous times, the certainty of taxes is not always applied evenly.”

“Do you know, that may be the most romantic thing you have ever said to me,” Enjolras said, grinning at him.

“Oh, hush,” Grantaire said, but he was laughing, and seemed, for the moment at least, to forget his concerns about Enjolras’s impending appointment with the Crown.

They resurfaced in full force the following day as Enjolras adjusted his cravat while waiting for the carriage to pull around. “How do I look?” he asked, and Grantaire cast a baleful eye at him.

“Dressed well enough for a meeting with the King and Queen, and not at all like you’re headed to imprisonment or worse.”

Enjolras managed not to roll his eyes, mostly because he did not think it would help the situation. “Luckily for both us, I highly doubt the latter options will come to pass.”

But Grantaire didn’t smile, just reaching out to take Enjolras’s hand. “Just come back to me,” he whispered.

“I have every intention of doing so,” Enjolras told him, his voice low.

Grantaire sighed. “You know I’m going to be a nervous wreck until you do,” he said. “Just like I am every time you’re in danger, even if normally you’re the idiot who’s put yourself there.”

Enjolras half-smiled. “Arguably I’ve put myself in this danger as well.”

Grantaire gave him a look. “We’ve had this argument before,” he said evenly.

“Yes, and I still refuse to cast any blame on you.”

Grantaire just shook his head. “An argument we’ll have to continue another time, it seems.”

Now Enjolras managed a real smile. “Yes, and all the more reason for me to return. You know I hate to leave a fight unfinished.”

“No, you hate to leave a fight unwon,” Grantaire said pointedly, but for the first time all morning, he looked a little less miserable, and Enjolras took that as a small win in and of itself.

“Are they not one and the same?” he asked innocently, leaning in to kiss Grantaire, who stopped him, his face falling again.

“Enjolras—” he started, and Enjolras frowned.

“What?”

Grantaire searched his expression for a moment before blurting, “I have never once wished you to be less than who you are, and I do not wish it now. The man I love does not back down from a challenge, and his tongue is sharper than any sword.” He paused as if choosing his next words carefully. “But I beg of you, tread lightly. I will not love you less for holding back if it means you survive to fight another day.”

Enjolras did kiss him then, a slow, heated kiss that said hopefully everything he couldn’t bring himself. “I cannot promise my mouth will not get me in trouble. But I do promise I will not deliberately seek it out.” Grantaire made a face and Enjolras gave him a pointed look. “It’s as good a promise as you will get from me.”

“I know.”

“And yet you don’t seem satisfied.”

Grantaire sighed. “I will be satisfied when you are home with me again.”

“And with luck, that will be before you know it,” Enjolras told him bracingly, so convincingly that he almost believed it himself, enough to get him out the door and into the carriage before finally allowing himself to feel the nerves he’d been trying to swallow all morning.

What he had told Grantaire was the truth: this meeting almost certainly meant no real punishment was in store for him.

But he had very little idea of what was in store for him. And that worried him most of all.

----------

Enjolras slowly closed the door behind him, unsurprised when Grantaire immediately appeared from the drawing room, a glass of whiskey in hand, which, judging by the glassiness of his eyes, wasn’t the first he’d had. “Are you ruined?” he asked.

“Define ruined,” Enjolras said, a little grimly.

Grantaire scowled. “Perhaps now is not the time to be glib.”

Enjolras just shook his head as he crossed to him, dropping a kiss on his lips and grabbing the glass of whiskey from his hand, downing it in one gulp. “I wasn’t,” he rasped, handing the glass back to Grantaire and making his way into the drawing room. “The fact is that there is a limit to the punishment I can receive, barring criminal conviction and without an Act of Parliament.” He collapsed onto the couch, reaching up automatically to loosen his cravat. “The Crown has taken what actions it can, which is to say, I am no longer the Viscount of Digne.”

He delivered the words solemnly, but Grantaire just blinked in response. “I did not realize that you were.”

“It is a customary title bestowed upon the current Marquess of Enjolras, with some associated lands,” Enjolras said with a shrug. “Both will be given to more deserving peers, I’m sure.” He hesitated before adding, “Also, none of our issue will be eligible to inherit my title or any lands, save for that which I own outright.”

Grantaire stared blankly at him. “Any of our issue?” he repeated. “As in children?”

Enjolras made a face. “Well, technically my issue. I don’t think the Crown cares so much about yours.” He cleared his throat. “But if I were to remarry and sire children, none of those children would inherit.”

Grantaire raised both eyebrows. “And what are the chances of that?”

“Absolutely none,” Enjolras said, barking a dry laugh. “The King has also told me that my services to his Court will no longer be necessary, meaning my various ceremonial duties will doled out to others and my power at Court, so to speak, is diminished. Beyond that, I retain my title of Marquess and associated lands and riches, which means I will lead a very comfortable life.” He reached out for Grantaire’s hand, lacing their fingers together before raising his hand to his lips to kiss his knuckles. “With you at my side, and without having to hide. So to answer your question, no, I don’t consider that ruin. I consider that a gift.”

Grantaire looked relieved, but he still hesitated. “Even though I will be almost certainly landless and penniless?” he asked, and when Enjolras just frowned at him, he sighed and elaborated, “I doubt highly my father will continue to grant me my allowance and use of the houses when he receives Le Cabuc’s letter.”

Enjolras squeezed his hand. “The Enjolras purse has sustained this family for generations. There’s more than enough left to take care of the man I love.”

Grantaire searched his expression for a moment. “Yet you don’t seem completely satisfied. What else did the King say?”

“Well—”

Before Enjolras could elaborate further, someone cleared her throat from the doorway, and they both turned to look at Enjolras’s mother, who looked unusually somber. “Am I interrupting?”

On instinct alone, Enjolras started to pull his hand away from Grantaire’s, but Grantaire held tight, squaring his shoulders as he met Enjolras’s mother’s expression coolly. “As a matter of fact, you are. Your son and I are having a private conversation.”

He turned back to Enjolras, who tried not to laugh at the look on his mother’s face. But to his surprise, his mother did not immediately snap some dismissive rebuttal, instead inclining her head slightly. “And you have my apologies for intruding, especially at this trying time. But I need to speak to my son, alone, especially in light of his recent visit to the palace.”

Enjolras wasn’t surprised that she had somehow heard about his summons. “Whatever you have to say, you can say in front of me,” Grantaire said firmly. “Your son and I are sharing our lives, and that includes dealing with whatever family affairs you’ve brought with you.” He again turned to look at her. “And need I remind you, your part in our deception has not yet been revealed, but I will be more than happy to tell anyone and everyone who will listen what drove your son to the desperation of a fake marriage in the first place. I doubt highly your friends among the nobility will be impressed by what they learn.”

Enjolras’s mother’s lips pursed, but again, Enjolras was completely thrown by her response. “Thank you,” she said simply, and Grantaire’s cold expression slipped as he glanced over at Enjolras, who just shrugged. “I can see that you are protective of my son, and while I may not appreciate your tone, I do appreciate knowing that my son has found someone who loves him as...vigorously as you clearly do.”

Grantaire’s eyes narrowed, but Enjolras cleared his throat. “It’s fine,” he told Grantaire, squeezing his hand once more. “I trust her enough to have a conversation with her, and I can fight my own battles as needed.”

“Are you certain?” Grantaire asked in an undertone, eyeing Enjolras’s mother warily. “I believe you can fight your own battles, but it’s her I don’t trust…”

Enjolras rolled his eyes affectionately. “I have managed this long,” he assured him.

“Fine.” Grantaire stood, but before leaving, he bent and kissed Enjolras, a long, slow kiss that Enjolras was fairly certain was for his mother’s benefit more than his own.

Not that he minded, since getting to kiss Grantaire and enrage his mother in the same blow was as close to perfection as Enjolras was likely to see in his lifetime.

Then Grantaire straightened again and winked at Enjolras before finally leaving, sidling past his mother with little more than a second glance. For her part, his mother looked mostly impassive at the display she had just witnessed, and she finally fully entered the room, perching imperiously on the armchair. “I suppose it’s too much to hope for tea,” she said with a sniff.

Enjolras barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes again. “You might have heard that my butler was attacked,” he said sourly. “I’m sorry if him being laid up recovering from being shot is inconvenient to you.”

“I did hear about Porter, yes, but that’s not to what I was referring,” she said. “Have the servants started fleeing en masse?”

“None have yet offered their resignations, if that’s what you mean,” Enjolras said.

“Of course it’s what I mean,” she snapped. “This is a tainted household now – I doubt most will want to stay. Especially as they’ve no way to ingratiate themselves with whomever the next Marquess will be.” Her lips pursed again. “Do you even know which distant relative is your heir, now that you will almost certainly never sire children of your own?”

Enjolras shrugged unconcernedly. “A third cousin, isn’t it? Lives somewhere out in the west, if memory serves.”

Her eyebrows knit together. “I’m surprised you know that.”

“You once told me all about him when I threatened to abdicate after Father died,” Enjolras said mildly. “You seemed to think it would convince me to think otherwise.”

“Clearly it did.”

Enjolras laughed dryly. “I hate to tell you, Mother, but that actually played a very small part in my decision.”

She scowled. “Perhaps you should have abdicated back then. It may have made for an easier transition for all involved.”

“Perhaps so,” Enjolras said honestly, as it wasn’t the first time the thought had crossed his mind. “But we are well past that point now.”

“In more ways than one.” She paused, giving him a searching look. “I don’t suppose there’s any point in trying to convince you to reconsider.”

Enjolras shook his head. “None.”

His mother nodded, her expression unreadable. “Then that’s the end of it.”

Enjolras hesitated, before saying, as casually as he could manage, “You seem…decidedly less surprised by this whole situation than I would expect.”

“What precisely is there to be surprised about?” she asked.

There were any number of things that Enjolras had expected her to be either shocked or scandalized by, let alone surprised, but the look on her face stopped him. “You mean…you knew?”

“That you were…otherwise inclined?” she provided delicately. “Of course I knew. A mother always knows.” Her expression twisted. “Though I rather hoped you would grow out of it, or at least do the sensible thing and marry a woman while seeking your amusement elsewhere.”

Enjolras shook his head slowly. “I’m not certain I see that as the sensible thing.”

She considered it for a moment before shrugging. “Perhaps not,” she said. “But more sensible than being stripped of your lands and titles.”

“Not all my lands, or all my titles,” Enjolras told her. “The Viscount of Digne is the only major one.”

She made a face. “No real loss there, the bishop in that area rules it with an iron fist and will probably be glad to see the backside of our family.”

Enjolras trusted her to know more about it than he did or frankly cared to. “And there’s a few minor lands that will be redistributed but for the most part, Grantaire and I have made it out unscathed.”

Again his mother made a face. “I don’t know that I would go that far—”

“I imagine you wouldn’t,” Enjolras muttered.

“—But all things considered, it could have been much worse.”

On that, at least, she was correct. “And I’m certain you’ll be glad to know that your own holdings will not be affected, nor your allowance,” he told her. “And Grantaire is letting you keep the dowry.”

That seemed to surprise her. “That is...generous of him,” she allowed, before frowning at her son. “But you speak as if all you think I care about is money.”

Enjolras just arched an eyebrow. “You have given me little evidence to suggest otherwise.”

“Caring about the well-being of my only son isn’t evidence enough?”

He managed not to roll his eyes, but just barely. “Faux sincerity isn’t your strong suit, Mother,” he informed her. “If you wish to convince me, you’ll have to try a different tack.”

To his surprise, she laughed lightly. “Maybe I will, when all the dust has settled,” she said, standing and brushing invisible dust from her skirt before telling him, “I will be leaving the city for the near future, and possibly even the country for a bit. I need my friends and allies at court to think that I was not party to this.”

“You weren’t,” Enjolras said, his brow furrowed. “And you are certainly at liberty to tell anyone you need to as such.”

“I have, and I will,” she said. “But I will also not outwardly condemn you the way they would wish, and that to some is enough to make them think otherwise.”

For the first time in what Enjolras was certain was his entire life, he was speechless. He had frankly expected her to do exactly that in order to maintain her social standing. “You could,” he blurted, ignoring the raised eyebrow she gave him. “Condemn us, I mean. I would not hold it against you if you did.”

“You and I both know that you absolutely would,” she said dryly. “But more than that, you are my son. For all your faults and all our disagreements, public and otherwise, that has never changed. And it will not change now.”

Enjolras was again taken aback by what she said. “Thank you,” he managed, before adding, a little wryly, “I think.”

A small smile crossed her face. “You’re welcome, I think. And now I should leave you to the start of your new life.”

She turned to head to the door, clearly deeming her role in this complete for the time being, but Enjolras stopped her, his curiosity getting the better of him. “What do you think of Grantaire?” he asked. “Now that you know what he is to me.”

She looked back at him, surprised. “You have never sought my approval before.”

“And I’m not seeking it now,” Enjolras said. “Just curious what you think.”

She nodded slowly. “He is not who I would have chosen for you,” she said after a long moment. “But then again, this life is not what I would have chosen for you.”

It was no more than what Enjolras had expected, but before he could say anything, she continued, “I know what you think of me, that you think me cold, and vain, and cruel. And there is certainly more than a little truth to that.” He looked up at her sharply, surprised by this most of all. “I know I shall always play the role of villain in your story. But despite what you may think, I have only ever wanted you to be happy.” She hesitated. “And it makes me terribly sad to know you have chosen a path where the world very well may never let you be happy.”

Enjolras just shook his head slowly. “The difference between you and I, Mother, is that I have never needed the approval of the world to be happy.” He gave her a sharp smile. “Hang what anyone else thinks. So long as I have Grantaire, we will make our own happiness.”

She returned his smile. “I do not doubt that you will. As I said before, you two make quite the pair, and whatever else you may think, I am glad that you two found each other.”

With that, she left, and Enjolras sat where he was for a long moment, digesting everything that had transpired. This had been a day of surprises, from his meeting with the King and Queen to now his conversation with his mother, and he shook his head slowly before standing to go find Grantaire.

He found him in the library, sitting sideways in an oversized armchair, his legs draped over the arm of the chair as he skimmed through a book with seemingly little interest. He brightened when he saw Enjolras come in, tipping his head up automatically for a kiss. “Is she gone?” he asked as Enjolras settled onto the sofa across from him.

“For now, yes.”

Grantaire’s eyes narrowed. “But not forever?”

Enjolras shook his head. “No, I’m afraid not even this scandal was enough to be rid of her forever. But I am...strangely not as bothered by that thought as I once would have been.”

Grantaire blinked. “Did she hit you on the head while she was in there with you?”

“Something like that, anyway,” Enjolras said with a laugh. “But enough about my mother. Where were we?”

He eyed Grantaire appreciatively, mentally trying to determine the mechanics of what they could do with him in that position, and Grantaire scowled. “Certainly not doing that,” he informed him, sitting upright. “You were finishing telling me about your audience with the King and Queen.”

“Oh. Right.” Enjolras shrugged and looked away. “Well, the Archbishop is apparently pushing for us to be excommunicated.”

Grantaire snorted. “Does that mean I no longer have to go to church?” he asked idly.

Enjolras rolled his eyes. “Well, among other things. But there’s an issue.”

“What’s that?”

“We could be imprisoned if we’re excommunicated, for a start.”

Grantaire just arched an eyebrow. “Just as we could be imprisoned for sodomy?”

Enjolras made a face. “The Crown has no intention of pursuing those charges,” he said. “But getting excommunicated could lend credence to future attempts at levying those charges, at likely the least opportune time.”

Grantaire considered it for a moment. “Well. We’ve faced worse prospects.”

Enjolras frowned. “You seem remarkably blasé about the prospect of excommunication, considering how concerned you’ve been about the possibility of imprisonment or worse for the other charges.”

“Mostly because you don’t seem particularly worried about it, and I imagine if this were an actual threat, you’d be somewhat less calm,” Grantaire said evenly. “Besides, I had several glasses of whiskey while you were out so it will take quite a bit for me to get riled at this point.”

“You didn’t seem to have any difficulty getting riled at my mother,” Enjolras pointed out.

Grantaire smiled grimly. “That was a more immediate danger.”

Enjolras shook his head. “Well, you’re not wrong about this not being an actual threat, I suppose. The Monarchy has little desire to create a public spectacle via excommunication and as the Head of the Church, I imagine that’s the end of the matter.”

Grantaire nodded slowly. “Does that mean you’re actually going to tell me what’s wrong?”

“Excommunication isn’t enough?” Enjolras asked, mostly rhetorically, and when Grantaire just gave him a look, he sighed. “Fine… I need to get word to Combeferre and Courfeyrac. We have much to discuss ahead of our next meeting.”

“Are you purposefully avoiding the question, or…?”

“I promise I am not,” Enjolras said, his voice low. “But they need to know, because this concerns all of us.” He paused, trying to figure out how to word what he needed to tell both Grantaire and his closest lieutenants. “I was...as surprised as any that the King did not wish to pursue any additional punitive matters. As a whole, the punishment dealt to me is mild, to say the least. And what troubles me is the reason he gave for why.”

Grantaire frowned. “He gave you a reason?”

Enjolras barked a dry, humorless laugh. “Oh, he gave me many. Most were mere platitudes, that out of respect for the service of my father, he would take no additional measures, etcetera, but he also alluded to his hope that our...situation would not inconvenience my political work.” He cleared his throat before adding sardonically, “That he hoped our allies would not abandon us with my public declaration of depravity.”

“And you suspect he actually hopes the opposite,” Grantaire said slowly.

Enjolras nodded. “I’m not going to pretend that my political sympathies are or have ever been well-received at court, and I think most were content to look the other way and pretend that the protests and political actions were the fun side project of an otherwise bored noble. Something I would grow out of in time. But now…”

He trailed off, and Grantaire’s expression turned grim. “Now they might not be so content to look the other way.”

“No,” Enjolras agreed. “And if I or any of our number were to get arrested—”

“Arrested again, you mean,” Grantaire said with the hint of a smile that Enjolras did not return.

“—My position is no longer enough to stave off any significant consequences.”

Grantaire went very still. “Meaning what?”

“Meaning I may not be ruined. We may not be ruined. But Les Amis may be.”

----------

In lieu of coming over to Enjolras’s to discuss the situation, Combeferre suggested via return message that they call a special meeting of Les Amis. “That seems unusual,” Grantaire murmured, his brow furrowed as he read over the brief message. “Why would they not just come here?”

Enjolras shrugged. “Perhaps they don’t want to be seen entering a den of sin,” he said, more blithely than he remotely felt.

“Jest all you wish, but you cannot pretend the thought hasn’t entered your mind,” Grantaire said. “Not that I believe any of our friends will turn on us entirely, but they are all trying to make marriages of their own, and to be tainted by association…”

He trailed off, and Enjolras just shook his head. “That is their prerogative, and I will not hold it against any man to abide by his conscience.”

“Or by the prospect of increasing his purse?” Grantaire asked sourly.

Enjolras shrugged again. “If that is truly their reasoning, I doubt highly we would be associates for much longer in any case.”

Still, it was with an unusual amount of trepidation that they approached the Musain, and Enjolras hesitated before instructing his driver to drop them off at the back of the building by the worker’s entrance. “I do not doubt they would still receive us at the front entrance,” he told Grantaire. “I am, after all, still a marquess and a certain amount of respect must be paid. But I would rather not put them in that position all the same.”

Grantaire managed a wan smile. “You need not explain yourself to me,” he said. “I understand as well as any that the situation is complicated.”

Enjolras glanced at him. “Speaking of,” he said carefully, “have you heard yet from your father?”

“No.” Grantaire’s tone was clipped as he avoided meeting Enjolras’s eyes, looking out the carriage window instead. “I have not heard from him one way or another, so I have no indication if he has yet received Le Cabuc’s letter.”

“Could Le Cabuc have been bluffing?”

Grantaire shrugged. “Anything’s possible, but I doubt it,” he said. “He always did prefer my father to me.” He hesitated before adding, “I thought I might make a preemptive trip back to the house and gather some belongings. Just some personal effects, and things from my mother and sister that I would rather not lose to my father’s whims.”

Enjolras nodded slowly. “That is probably not a terrible idea.” He hesitated before asking, “Do you wish for me to accompany you?”

“I suspect that would cause more problems than it’s worth,” Grantaire said. “If I go by myself, I can hopefully slip in and out mostly unnoticed.”

Enjolras had expected that answer, but he couldn’t pretend that it didn’t sting, just a little. “Of course.”

Something of what he was feeling must’ve shown on his face, but Grantaire’s expression softened as he added, “Which doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t love for you to return with me, or that I won’t miss you dreadfully while I’m gone.”

“But this is the reality of the life we’ve chosen,” Enjolras said heavily. “Going in the servants’ entrance to avoid being seen. Travelling incognito to not cause a scene. Less visitors or invitations to visit because people won’t wish to be associated with us.”

Grantaire eyed him warily. “I feel as though you are trying to make a point.”

Enjolras shrugged. “Just that I do not care about any of those things. But I would understand if you did, and if the reality of our life together does not align with what you may otherwise have expected.”

To his surprise, Grantaire laughed. “How many times must you and I have this conversation?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I wish that you had chosen a better life for yourself than one stuck with me, who was always titleless and is about to be in short order landless and penniless to boot, just as you wish I had chosen a better life for myself,” Grantaire said, a little impatiently. “But you and I both know that the best choice, the only choice, is each other and whatever accompanies that.”

Enjolras laughed as well, feeling a little relieved that they were on the same page in terms of what mattered. “You’re right.”

“I usually am,” Grantaire said smugly before reaching for Enjolras’s hand and lacing their fingers together. Une vie et un amour, remember?”

“Fidelitas usque ad mortem,” Enjolras said, his voice low, and Grantaire smiled.

“And I still aim to be.”

Together, they stepped down from the carriage and made their way into the Musain through the backdoor. The workers they passed barely gave them second glances, though Enjolras assumed that was likely because they recognized them as frequent patrons, and knew better than to stop or question them.

But despite arriving almost a half hour before the meeting Combeferre had called was set to begin, when they reached the backroom, they could hear the buzz of voices through the closed door. Grantaire gave him a startled look. “Has the meeting already begun?”

“It certainly appears that way,” Enjolras said, feeling inexplicably nervous as he stared at the closed door, straining to hear what was being said beyond it.

“Did Combeferre not say that it would start at 9?”

Enjolras nodded. “He did, but…” He trailed off, not willing to vocalize his doubts. Instead, he squared his shoulders and opened the door, walking in with Grantaire at his side. Combeferre and Courfeyrac stood at the front of the room, the rest of their number assembled, all looking unusually somber, and all conversation stalled as soon as they looked back at Enjolras. “Forgive the interruption,” Enjolras said coolly, closing the door behind him. “I did not realize the hour of our meeting had changed.”

“It didn’t,” Combeferre said, his expression impassive. “But there was certain business we felt we should attend to before your arrival.”

“What sort of business?” Grantaire asked with a frown.

Combeferre did not seem deterred by his tone. “The business of determining if your continued membership amongst our association is beneficial or a detriment, mostly.”

“I see,” Enjolras said, his heart sinking in his chest. “Well, don’t let us impede your discussion.”

“We have nothing left to discuss,” Courfeyrac interjected. “All that remains is to vote.”

Grantaire reached out and took Enjolras’s hand, lacing their fingers together firmly. Combeferre cleared his throat. “All those in favor of expelling Enjolras and Grantaire from our number due to their sexual deviance and the threat that it poses to Les Amis and our efforts?”

Not a single hand rose in the air, and Grantaire squeezed Enjolras’s hand.

“And all those opposed?”

As one, all of their friends raised their hands before standing and applauding. Joly and Bossuet were positively beaming, Courfeyrac wolf-whistled, and Combeferre stepped forward to embrace Enjolras. “There was never any doubt which way the vote would go,” he told Enjolras, “but I knew you would not be satisfied if there was no vote at all.”

“Besides, if we start exiling people for buggery, there are more than a few of us who would be in trouble,” Courfeyrac said cheerfully as he embraced Enjolras as well.

“Hear, hear,” Bahorel chortled.

Joly took Bossuet’s hand and squeezed it. “Grantaire helped us avoid a scandal of our own, and we owe him our loyalty,” he said. “Besides which, I swore to go through fire for you, and I would not forsake that oath lightly.”

“Thank you, my friends,” Enjolras said quietly, his chest tight with emotion.

Grantaire squeezed his hand once more before leaning in and whispering in his ear, “It appears I am not the only one who understands the meaning of loyalty until death.” Enjolras wordlessly squeezed his hand in return and Grantaire smiled at him before asking Courfeyrac, “But one of our number is missing, is he not? Where is your erstwhile roommate this evening?”

“Oh, he has found the girl he was looking for,” Courfeyrac said airily. “It turns out your little announcement was good for more than one thing – she was the one who swooned in his arms!”

Much laughter greeted that announcement and Enjolras shook his head. “Leave it to Marius…” he started before trailing off, glancing around the room at the smiling faces of each of his friends, all those whom he loved most in this world. “Thank you all,” he said softly. “I know this will not be easy, but I appreciate your continued faith and love.”

“Our goal has always been to fight against oppressive powers in whatever form,” Combeferre told him. “And condemning men based on consensual acts in their bed chamber would be playing into that oppression.”

“Just promise us one thing,” Bossuet interjected.

Enjolras raised both eyebrows. “What’s what?”

“No funny business,” Bossuet said, mock-sternly. “No suddenly agreeing with everything the other says just because it’s your lover saying it.”

Again everyone laughed and Enjolras shook his head good-naturedly. “I don’t think we’re in much danger of that.”

“After all,” Grantaire added slyly, “what I love far more than him agreeing with me is that delightful shade of red he gets when he so vehemently disagrees with me. Who am I to give that up now?”

“In truth,” Enjolras said when the laughter again died down, “we aim to keep things as much the same as we can.”

“And we’ll be relying on you lot to keep it that way,” Grantaire said.

“There’s one other promise we would ask,” Feuilly said, glancing around. “Or at least, that I would ask.”

Enjolras’s smile faded, just slightly, at Feuilly’s far more serious tone. “If it is in our power to grant it, we will.”

“No more lies.” There were a few murmurs of agreement that Feuilly waited to die down before continuing, “There is not a man among us who does not understand the reason for your deception, but we in this room are brothers, and we deserve the truth no matter what consequence it may bring.”

Grantaire took Enjolras’s hand once more and squeezed it before affirming, “No more lies. We owe not just you the truth from here on out, but each other as well. And it’s the very least that we can give in return for your generosity and personal sacrifices.”

“In that case, let us open the wine and get the celebration started,” Jehan called, standing up on his chair to be seen. “To Enjolras and Grantaire!”

“To Enjolras and Grantaire!” everyone repeated, whatever glasses they had in hand, and Enjolras rolled his eyes with obvious affection before leaning in and kissing Grantaire as everyone cheered.

Grantaire was grinning as he pulled away, and that sight alone was enough to make everything they had endured and everything that they had left to endure absolutely worth it in Enjolras’s opinion. But before he could say anything to that effect to Grantaire, Joly and Bossuet grabbed Grantaire by both arms, tugging him away. “You owe us more than mere truth,” Joly said, with an almost evil grin. “You owe us details.”

“Exactly,” Bossuet said, wearing a matching smile. “And we want to hear all about your first time bedding Enjolras.”

“We promised the truth, not all the gory details,” Grantaire protested, making a pleading face at Enjolras, who just laughed.

Before he could rescue him, Combeferre pulled him aside. “I wanted a moment, if it is not too much of an imposition.”

Enjolras clapped him on the shoulder. “For you, my friend, never. Especially as I believe I owe you especially an apology for our deceit.”

Combeferre shook his head. “I understand it more now,” he said. “And honestly, I’m surprised I did not put the pieces together earlier.”

“Grantaire said he was always a little obvious, even if I never noticed either,” Enjolras said good-naturedly.

But Combeferre just shook his head. “Grantaire may have been, but it’s you I should have noticed.”

“Me?”

Combeferre shrugged. “Looking back on it, all the clues were there, least of all how you allowed Grantaire to stay, not just for meetings, but well into the night when you were ostensibly working, a privilege bestowed on no one else. And I cannot help but think that if I had noticed sooner, we would have had more time to plan, to minimize the fallout.”

Enjolras just shook his head. “My friend, you could have told me until you were blue in the face that I was completely and obviously in love with Grantaire, and I would never have believed you,” he said. “It was something I needed to figure out with him.” He made a face. “Though you are right that I should have told you sooner, before we made our announcement, so that plans could have been made in advance, and for that, I do owe you an apology.”

“One that I readily accept,” Combeferre told him. “And the only recompense I ask from you is the answer to this: are you happy?”

“Yes,” Enjolras said, without even needing to consider it. “More so than I thought was possible, or at least probable.”

Combeferre gave him a wide, genuine smile. “Then the rest we will deal with when or if the time comes.”

Again, Enjolras’s chest felt tight with emotion, with the weight of how much his friends cared for him and Grantaire. “I truly do not know how to thank you, how to thank everyone, for what you have given Grantaire and myself.”

“There is no need to thank us,” Combeferre said. “Especially since you have given us something equally precious.”

“What do you mean?”

“You are free,” Combeferre said simply. “And that gives the rest of us hope.”

----------

Enjolras let out a sigh of relief mingled with happiness as he sat down in the waiting carriage. Grantaire clambered in after him, and sat down on the bench next to him instead of sitting across from him. “That went well.”

“That went far better than well,” Enjolras said.

Grantaire glanced sideways at him. “Surely you did not expect Combeferre or Courfeyrac to abandon you, or honestly any of our friends.”

Enjolras just shrugged. “In truth, I did not know what to expect.” He nudged Grantaire gently. “Thank you, by the way.”

“Whatever for?”

“For making my life complete,” Enjolras said honestly. “And so completely happy.”

Grantaire smiled at him, his eyes shining even in the dim light of the carriage, but he promptly ruined the moment by asking, “How much wine did you drink?”

Enjolras rolled his eyes. “I had half a glass at best,” he protested. “Not nearly enough to undermine my sincerity. Nor my conviction that somehow, against all odds and, frankly, against our own efforts to the contrary, everything for us is turning out better than I ever could have imagined, let alone hoped.”

Grantaire rested his head against Enjolras’s shoulder. “We have been extraordinarily lucky,” he murmured.

“We have been,” Enjolras agreed, squeezing Grantaire’s hand. “We have our friends, and we have each other. Whatever else comes our way, so long as we still have that, we will be fine.”

“More than fine,” Grantaire corrected, raising Enjolras’s hand to his lips to kiss his knuckles. “Our future will be happy. Of that, I am as certain as anything.”

“Being in love really has changed you if you suddenly start espousing convictions,” Enjolras teased.

But Grantaire just smiled at him. “It’s changed us both.”

“For the better?” Enjolras asked.

Grantaire kissed him, a gentle, sweet kiss that was a promise of more to come. “For the best.”

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