#come all ye people let me talk about my beautiful brain goblins

[siderods]

Great! Great News!

You hear it here first, folks! you can now once again ask me for my scalding hot takes on Thomas the tanken-danken, or thoughts on real railroad stuff!

Also, feel free to ask about things like Misty Island: Thunderstruck, or any of the other insane people that live inside my head.

Who knows, depending on how it's written you may even get an in-character response! ;]

Have a good one!

[therealmintedmango]

Cerberus - Part One

Summary: ...”An eerie shadowy figure looms across the way making my murderous blood run cold. It looks smaller than a bear so the thought of running into a bloodthirsty wild animal leaves my mind. It looks not like a wild boar or cat. Wait. There appears to be not just one figure looming across the meadow but two. My eyes widen. The figures don't move but they both stand like humans would upon two legs. But they are bigger… Much larger now that I squint across at these two unknown figures. My stomach drops as I feel like a low growl is produced by the looming, unwavering figures… with… glowing amber eyes?...”

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

Genre: Werewolf/ Shifter AU; Medieval AU; Strangers-To-Lovers AU; Heavy Angst; Soulmate AU; Eventual romance/ smut

Beta Read By: @justanothergirlfromeurope​ Thank you so much my darling for helping me with this! You are wonderful! Thank you! 💖

Rating: NC 18+, Explicit 

Words: 5,379 

Pairings: (Eventually) ot7 BTS x Human Female Reader 

Warnings: Dark themes; Possible Yandere Vibes in the future; Death; Gore; Murder/ Killing; Implied Incest (nothing happens - I promise); Mentions of being naked/ being seen naked; I think that’s it.

It’s late July in the afternoon, the hot sun baking boils on exposed skin if you are a brave enough soul to show any flesh. The cicadas cry, the large winged beasts screaming into the scorching air, sounding like terrible, angry monsters. My giggles cut through the loud droning of the winged beetles, pleased to my core I even let out an unladylike snort, shoulders shaking as Seungkwan tells the group of us a joke. I sit with a few of my brothers - the princes of the land in which father rules - in the shade of the maple when the laughing ceases as a shadow blocks the sun from roasting us further. The younger crowd of my brothers and I look up to see it is men from the king’s court, walking over to our shady spot in the garden, solemn features, shiny hats, and a loyalty to my father is the only thing they share. 

They say that mother has passed.

My brother Minghao gets up and asks where the older kin of boys are. The advisors tell him as he barks at us to stay here. The castle, they say. Infection, they say. Seokmin gasps, the bright smile like mother’s downturned at the news. Seungkwan’s joyful attitude dies. Vernon covers his face with his hands, a sob ripping from his throat. Youngest of my thirteen brothers, Chan, clings to me suddenly, tears welling in his large brown orbs as I hold him steadfast. 

The food sitting in my stomach feels rotten and cursed all of a sudden. All the sound dies from my ears, my mouth hangs open as the breath escapes me. 

Infection they say? How could they say such a thing? She was never ill, I think as people are running in and out of the castle, screaming and crying—something I wish I could do at this moment. I flinch, hearing my most vicious brother - Soonyoung - bellow a sound I wasn’t aware he was able to produce. 

I feel the same, but only in my heart for my lips cannot utter even a simple, single whisper. 

I was never close with mother even being the only daughter she had out of the fourteen children she created over the years with father when she was fertile - the only job a woman of nobility has in these times. And when she is finished having many children she is to still retain her youthful appearance which she did easily. 

They said that she gave her children a little piece of herself when she birthed us all. Chan has her sparkling eyes, Seokmin her smile, Junhui has her high cheekbones, Soonyoung has her unbreakable spirit, Minghao has her sharp tongue, Jeonghan has her cunning brain, Jihoon has her feisty attitude, Mingyu has her ability to be understanding and kind in the midst of her fire and passion, Seungkwan retains her strange sense of humor, Wonwoo got her cool intelligence, Vernon got her uncanny skill to be so young but so strong at the same time, Seungcheol has her unyielding stride, and Joshua her wit. And they say that I am a twin of my mother physically: her hair, her body type, her smile, eyes, her wide hips, sharp shoulders, feet, hands, legs, and even my fingernails. 

I only wish I had her spirit and fire my brothers bear, but perhaps they took it all before I was created in her belly? They say that children suck precious things out of you. Did I take everything else from her? Was my guilt eating me alive? 

My father, the king of this land, kept her locked away most of the time in the high tower of the west portion of the castle. I don’t know much about father but I know he is easily jealous. He wants the best whatever that may be: the most children, the best cloaks, the best military, the cleanest streets, the shiniest coins, the happiest peasants, the most beautiful queen in all of the land. Father hated when mother would talk to anyone that wasn’t close kin at dinner time or when we went to the market when she would merely look at the fruit seller man. She would be gone for days, no trace of her for a week or so, emerging with tired eyes, brushing the stray hairs from my face as she smiled sadly at me. Little did I know there was no fruit seller in the cobblestone market either. 

Still, my heart aches for a mother I had and hardly ever knew. 

The sound of the boisterous cicadas fills my ears, hearing returning to normal as brothers Jeonghan and Joshua come to collect us shortly after that, faces made of what looks like stone. 

-

It has been many moons since mother has passed. The air that was once ripe with colors and sounds is quieter now. It’s cool, my peacoat and shawl wrapped around me when I roam the garden in the afternoon with a different brother each day. It’s almost time for a harvest moon which comes in a week, Wonwoo told me on our walk yesterday. The demons and goblins of the underworld are said to have sprung up from the dirt and mud during these times. We sent mother away on a burning ship out to sea so I can’t help but wonder if mother is in the sky, the ground, or the sea still. 

My brother Soonyoung and I walk quietly together, the brown leaves crunching under our boots. It is a rare time when his voice is still. I know he is pondering what to say to me. 

What can one say to me? 

I love them deeply though, their touch and affection they still bring to me after each day. Sun up to sun down they coddle me. They have always coddled me, even the elder ones who are fit and strong and ready to be wed treat me as if I am a babe. I used to hate feeling like this, like I am small and unimportant, a babe who needs protecting. The only daughter the king has ever had. One of fourteen. I am no one to my father, to his people. But to my brothers now I see, I am their youngest sister. Something they only have one of. They cling tighter to me emotionally and physically now that mother is no longer here. 

I will take this feeling and hold onto it. I am important to them for that is why they treat me this way. 

The sound of horse hooves clattering up the path behind startles me. Soonyoung shields me, pulling me into his warm chest. I am comforted and protected. 

“Prince Soonyoung, Princess.” The captain speaks monotone. They do not call my name for I am a woman. Even of nobility and the pride of my brothers, I have no name besides my title.  

The captain’s lips move. I have no idea if what I heard was true. Soonyoung snarls and tells them that it's preposterous and evil and to shoo before he cuts them with his blade attached to his hip. They turn on their stallions and leave, a fog rolling into the garden as I feel hot and confused. 

Did I hear them correctly? 

They say that father wants to marry me.

They say that he will never be able to find a bride as beautiful and as perfect as my mother. They said that I will wed at sunset tomorrow. 

It is my turn to be made of stone as I fall into darkness. My breath is gone, a warm exhale hits the cool air, leaving my lips in a wisp before I pass out in my middle brother’s strong arms. 

-

When I awaken, my eldest brother, Prince Seungcheol, is heard pleading with my father in the political hall. His usually calm voice echoes against the rock of the building, the fire crackling in his basins as my thirteen brothers all object to me being my father's next bride. His brows are kit, furrowed as his lips speak my thoughts for me while father watches with mild amusement, seated at his holy throne. 

“She is not ready to be wed! She has not even bled yet!” He remarks, flinging his hands out to his sides. Little do they know, I have, I have just kept it a secret, becoming a woman is nobody's business but my own. “She is your daughter! Think, father! Think! How the kingdom will hate you for that! It is vile!” His voice cracks, tears swim in his brown eyes as my brothers shake their heads in agreement. 

Yes. How vile indeed, I think watching them all silently behind a pillar from above the hall. 

Father gets up with a wretched smile stretched upon his lips. I take a few steps forward, uncloaking myself from the secrets of the darkness in my nightgown a maid must have dressed me in, looking over the stone railing. “She is our littlest sister! Our only sister! She deserves to be married for love and only love-“

SLAP. 

I gasp as my stomach pits into itself. My brothers flinch. 

“How dare you talk like this to me, Seungcheol!” Father spits, anger flashing in his eyes like the fire in the torch basins. “She is a woman. She has no rights no matter who and what she is. She belongs to me.” 

“How dare you treat Y/N like an object and not like your daughter!” Soonyoung snarls, mothers fire lit inside of him like the hot sun. He is brilliant and strong like a tiger who burns through the forest in his powerful wake. 

Father raises his hand striking Soonyoung across his cheek with a sound that echoes in the corners of the hall. Something falls from his hands, though its clanking sound is covered up from the shouts that follow. 

“How dare you thirteen boys!” Father is shouting, my feet are moving on their own, rushing down the stairs to my brothers. “All of you are utterly worthless!” He shouts as Mingyu, the tallest brother, rage ablaze on his face as he moves toward the king, arms raised as he acts like he is about to slap father. 

Please, don’t! Is what I want to say, but I cannot. 

“Guards!” My father shouts into the hall as they come running in at his command. “Flog them all hundred lashes each!” He smiles a wicked smile as I run up to the scene with the ones carrying swords and pointed sticks. “And if they make a sound give them ten more!”

My brothers are being beaten and detained and my heart is breaking into fragile glass as the noise and blood coming from their mouths is too much to bear.

I do the only thing I can do. 

It is my turn to protect my brothers. 

Please mother, give me all your strength to stand up to this vile, evil man who surely killed you for the sport of it. My gut twists thinking of the peril I may face rising to the challenge that is our father. 

“Stop!” I say, my voice shaking as the next few seconds feel like hours and the eyes of all the men in the hall are on me. I walk toward my weathered and old looking father as he smirks a devilish grin down at me ascending the steps to his throne. 

“Father please, I beg you: I will marry you and do whatever you say, as long as you let them go now.” My voice does not shake now. My voice is calm and steady. Mother’s spirit fills me at this moment as I speak up to my father. Before this, I have not spoken to him before this for what feels like eons until now. 

“No!” Several of my brothers yell as I stand in false confidence, inhaling the iron from the red liquid that fills the hall. “No! No! No!” They shout as I stand in front of the man that doesn’t see me as a daughter. I am an object to him, whether I like it or not. 

He smiles, stroking his wiry, grey beard as he sits back on his golden chair, cloaks draped over his shoulders pool and spill over the seat behind him. 

“Whatever you say?” Father quips and I nod, hands balling into fists onto my sides, nails that are not mine dig into skin that is also not mine. “Then strip.”

My eyes grow wide, my lips part in shock, my blood which is mine boils, white-hot and merciless trapped in this skin that should belong to my mother. 

“Father, please!” Jeonghan, my father’s son and second eldest, pleads now. “Be reasonable!”

“She said anything, boys.” My father, the ugly worm that he is, states calmly. 

“Should a virgin be seen like this before she is wed?” Joshua makes a good point while father rips his pupils away from me as Jihoon, smart bugger that he is, recites the article of the kingdom where it is unlawful for a virgin to be seen in such a state before she is made another man’s woman. 

Father scoffs as he says, “Flog them two hundred times if they don’t like-“

“No.” I say, holding my ground, brushing hair out of my face. All eyes on me again as Chan starts crying. “I will do what you wish.” 

“Then do it!” Father shouts, banging his fist on the arm of the golden seat as he gets up. “Do it now and if anyone makes a noise: I will behead you.” 

I do it. I find the buttons on my yellow nightgown, my hands do not shake or waver as I shake the comfortable garment from my shoulders. My slip is the only thing that covers me now. My brothers close their eyes, look away, Chan choking on his sobs but the only thing I can hear is the roar of the crackling of fire. I step out of my nightgown, walking up to my father's throne. I see it. Glinting in the torch light. A stray blade lies upon the steps close to the devil king that is my flesh and blood. 

Praise the gods for the viscous middle brother I have. 

I step out of my white slip now, distracting the men who have their wicked eyes set upon me, hungry wolves ready to take any meat they can. I hold my father’s gaze as it travels down my body, making sure he does not look upon what my right hand is doing. 

I have it. I move quickly, the spirit of my mother now fully alive inside of the body that is said not to be mine. 

But now it’s mine. 

I am not a disrespectful child nor have I lashed out against my parents ever. I followed the rules without exception, never spoke out of turn and always let my older brothers go first for treats and presents. Always. I am a slave to my family and the system that I was born into. The ugly demons and snaggle-toothed goblins are really alive and well during this time as my brothers have said. The scent of strong ale hits my nose the closer I get. Maybe the beings of the underworld have possessed him? I am looking for a way out, a way to logically justify the way father is. But no. I know the real answer. 

This man is evil. Has always been evil. And he needs to be stopped. 

I am not a killer. But I am sick of the mistreatment of my family. I know my father killed my mother. There was no infection. None. 

Like a crazy witch with eyes burning like white-hot coals, whose blood is singeing to be set free, I plunge the pointed blade into my father’s throat. 

Blood spurts from his neck, squirting against my bare flesh, his eyes roll back as he gurgles profanity, my body blazing as my whole existence is overcome with the desire to end this cycle of corrupt injustice. 

“Run!” Vernon shouts as the guards descend in my direction. I drop the blade in haste, my brothers scream for me to run away as the guards scream mutiny. 

And I do. 

—

-Somewhere deep within the neighboring wood...-

“I’m hungry.” A clear tenor tone sounds off in the dark wood, a small chuckle leaving his lips as he resumes a human form in all his naked glory. Hoseok’s lithe body full of sweat glistens under the moonlight as he reaches for his purple cloaks under the large tree in the middle of the bog they just finished running around in. 

“Me as well, brother.” A deep bass vibrates off the trunks of the thick trees, his wolf form morphing into his handsome, tan body. 

“Taehyung, Hoseok.” A soft voice wafts through the air. “We aren’t to feast before the full moon.” The eldest quips, melting from his shiny fur, shaking his dark locks free from his collar as he dresses under the almost pregnant moon. 

“I can’t wait.” The second eldest grunts as he comes into the torch light that was burning on the stump next to their favorite tree. “The air is ripe with so much wildlife tonight.” He wets the edges of his lips, the thought of fresh, pink, juicy flesh at the forefront of his mind as well as his brothers.

“Where are Jungkook and Jimin?” Namjoon growls as he quickly morphs into his tall self, sweaty skin glistening under the light from the mother moon. Their run through the dense wood was very fruitful in the sense that they let loose and got a lot of pent up energy out of their bodies.

“Weren’t they behind you, Yoongi?” Seokjin questions as he scoops up the younger one’s clothes in his arms, signaling Taehyung and Namjoon to take the torch light. Yoongi shakes his white hair back and forth with a solemn grunt. “Very well,” Seokjin nods, twitching his nostrils in the air. “Hoseok, you have the loudest howl. Will you please call for the troublemakers?” 

The man with the hair as bright as cherry pie chuckles right before he sucks in a large breath. The third eldest bellows a howl that will be heard throughout the wood surely. 

They wait with bated breath for two of the younger brothers to respond. The wind whips around them carrying the smell of fallen, rotting leaves, thick moisture in the atmosphere, and the odor of something unfamiliar in the air. They all exchange looks in the torches' soft, orange glow. Something doesn’t feel right. 

The five brothers start to become uneasy. Taehyung shifts on his feet. Yoongi wets the edges of his lips more. Namjoon shifts his eyes between his brothers, swallowing uncomfortably. Hoseok frowns, kicking a few leaves in the dirt as he waits for the brothers to return his call. 

After another moment or two, the second eldest bristles, anger flashing in his amber orbs. “I swear if those wild banshees from the Twicelands have set another trap for us in our forest-“

The white-haired brother is cut off by the sudden cry of both of his brothers they were in search of, coming east off the dense bog.

“Come quickly!” Jimin yelps, his higher pitch ringing around the wood. “Come see brothers!” 

Meanwhile, Jungkook only utters one word that has the brothers taking off like bats out of the deep trenches of hell. “Mate!”

—

My skin is on fire, my fingertips numb, and my feet hurt as I run naked from the castle into the blackness of the night. 

I escaped through the kitchens, not a sane soul awake at this hour so I quietly slipped through the cracks. I hear more yelling and shouting but I cannot slow down. The blood of my father drips down my naked body, making me feel like a painted warrior. 

A shout is heard from the stable. The men on my father’s court call my name but it is not a happy sound. It is a sound of lies, of deceit, of pain they want to inflict upon me. I shudder when I hear Soonyoung scream a throaty battle cry into the evening air, on his way to find these men and rip them limb from limb surely. 

Under the almost full, pregnant moon, a blood bath is occurring in the usually peaceful castle.

I trip on an exposed root from a tree beyond the stables. When I gather myself, pushing up off the ground, I see a bed sheet hanging from a line out to dry and I snatch it from the air. I tie it, tugging it around myself loosely, giving my legs room to carry me off into the thick wood that lines the backside of the castle. 

Dread and fear taint my senses as I pad along the brush barefoot, trying to maintain a quietness even though I am running. The fallen leaves crunch underfoot, the earth cold. My naked body starts to shiver, the adrenaline of my actions wilting away as I fly through branches and bushes. I have no clue where I am headed, the pale moonlight guiding me. Wherever I see on my path I go next. 

My feet slip on the slick ground under my feet. I trip over my heel several times, mud and dirt covering my palms as I right myself. I must not look like a princess, so disgusting, covered in blood and unkept in this feeble, white bed sheet. 

I have to press on, I remind myself.

My breathing is ragged as I climb through long, pointed branches and under low shrubs. I stop for a second to catch my breath as I glance at the almost completely blackened forest. The nightlife of the dark wood whispering around me: bats screeching overhead, crickets that haven’t died out sing into the cold night air, even a pack of wolves howl out into the throes of the velvet evening. 

I suck in a cool gust of air, ready to trek along the unknown path once more. 

Wisps of my breath leave my lips as the cold night air stings my lungs. It feels as though I have been running for ages, the torch light not visible through the thickness of the tall trees. Have I run far enough? I think as I come to a little clearing in the wood, a meadow of soft, lush clover encompasses the land. 

An eerie shadowy figure looms across the way making my murderous blood run cold. It looks smaller than a bear so the thought of running into a bloodthirsty wild animal leaves my mind. It looks not like a wild boar or cat. Wait. There appears to be not just one figure looming across the meadow but two. My eyes widen. The figures don't move but they both stand like humans would upon two legs. But they are bigger… Much larger now that I squint across at these two unknown figures. My stomach drops as I feel like a low growl is produced by the looming, unwavering figures… with… glowing amber eyes?

 A wind whips through the meadow quickly, breezing from behind me, whipping my hair and the bedsheet about like a flag on a pike. 

I hear the sound of horses and I gasp, covering my mouth with the noise I just made. I shake my head, snapping out of my trance of looking to the almost human like figures. 

Have they found me? Have the guards and the men of my father’s court located me? My brothers were surely fighting, right? I pray none of my kin have lost their lives because of me. Or are they not men from my father’s castle? Would they hurt me? Torture me? Deflower me?

I shudder. 

I turn to run east, looking over my shoulder to the figures that have disappeared in the trees. A fog sweeping through the thicket, blocking my vision. It was probably a trick of my scared mind, I remind myself. 

Another thought chills me to the bone as I feel the exposed skin of my legs and arms slice under the thorn bush I accidentally stumble into, making more noise than necessary. I squeak in pain. The more I try and pry myself of the spikes, the more I become entangled inside of the nasty, winding plant. I want to call for help but I don’t want to alert whatever is coming near me. 

It is almost the harvest moon. The line between realms is blurred meaning creatures that normally I think exist in fairy tales are real at this time of year. Could it be a wandering herd of ghouls? A pack of wild demons coming to devour my flesh clean off my bone? My body shakes with uncertainty as I paw about the dirt. 

Ever since I was a little girl, my brothers have warned me about the wood. I should never go in alone. I should always bring someone. I should always have a weapon or a horse or something to protect me. Monsters are said to lurk in the bog that the wood surrounds in a thick sea of lush brush and vegetation. 

An owl hoots overhead as the sound grows thicker, heavier. The footfalls inching closer and closer by the second. The wolf’s howl sounds off again, this time the cries from the beast desperate - the noise much too close for comfort. 

No, I think as I freeze with a bone-chilling noise that vibrates off the trees around me. Not just one lone wolf howl. There are two very distinct animal noises that echo off the earth I lie bound to. One softer and longer. The other a little nasally and short - more like a bark than a howl. 

I should have run to the market, I think, body shaking from the cold and acute fear that plagues my mind. I should have tried to hide with a peasant or two until this treacherous act blew over or married a nobleman’s family in a neighboring town. Mentally I chastise myself as the thunderous noise draws closer and closer. Why am I so rash?

My heart hurts, it clenches in around itself as I look up into the shimmering moon hanging low in the sky. In a bed of thorns I lie, blood from wounds of my own and from my father still flows down my body, exhaustion overtakes me finally. I’m entangled, suffocating in the sharp spikes that pierce my body, choking me from the freedom I so desire. I can’t move my muscles, my body tense and sore, my feet blistered and cold. I’m weary. A tear rolls out of my eye and falls onto my dirty cheek as I snap my orbs tightly closed, the horses almost upon me, I think as I hiccup a sob. 

All of a sudden, the boisterous noise of what sounded like a hundred horses pounding toward me, stops. I suck in a breath and prepare for the worst. An eye for an eye, right? So they should slit my throat like I did to father.

It is my turn to die. 

“Little bird,” a soft, steady tenor of a voice purrs out above me that I don’t recognize. My eyes fly open, revealing a glowing torch light and a few handsome faces I cannot place hanging around me. “It seems you’ve flown far from your nest.” He simpers, flames dancing off his puffy lips as he gently brushes a stray hair away from my unkempt face. He shows no disgust, only empathy as he gazes upon me trapped in this tangle of wild thicket. 

I flinch as the long thorn branches I have ensnared myself in are being removed from my shivering body. The other boys, I’m unsure of how many surround me, take extreme caution, trying not to harm me as they pull the plants off of me. 

“Are you from Royaume des Diamants (Kingdom of Diamonds)?” His puffy, pink lips utter quietly in the night. I stare at his sculpted face, admiring his accent as I feel like the terrors of the darkness are melting away with his soft speech. I say nothing but look up into the rich eyes that seem to glow a golden-amber shade in the torch light. They bewitch me and I am in awe. “Little bird?” His perfect brows twist into an expression of concern and I take a moment to glance away from his otherworldly face and to his other features for a second. 

Dressed in rich purple with gold medals hanging from his broad shoulders, I can tell he was from a family of prestige. His lips are giant and lush but they are not out of place on his pale face. He appears to be a prince from those fairy tales I’ve heard so much about from the stories my brothers have told me since I was a babe. His dark hair envelopes his face, curling just at the ends, making him look far younger than I am sure he is. They finish uncovering me from the thorns and all gaze upon me covered in blood, dirt, sweat - looking positively disheveled - the farthest thing from a princess. 

“Hyung,” a deep bass speaks from behind the broad shouldered noble-man, “she’s shivering.” A tan boy with thick eyebrows observes above me. His velvety voice makes my cold body feel warm with the way his timbre seems to echo off the wood of the trees around me. 

“I know you are probably frightened and it looks like you have been through a lot…” The prince-like man holds an arm out for me to take. “...and even though your lips don’t speak, I do not wish for you to freeze out here in the wood.” The boys surrounding me shake their heads in agreement with the handsome one speaking. “Will you come with us, little bird?” 

I don’t want to die and I don’t want to die out here in the cold night. Even if they want to hurt me or worse, I don’t want to die frozen to death in the thicket. Somehow, I don’t think they are bad men, but my threshold of trust was high due to the internal struggle I faced with my family. Still, I feel oddly comforted by the seven who are mostly quiet above me. 

As I go to speak - to tell them ‘yes’, opening my lips slowly, nothing comes out. Not a peep or a squeak I can utter. The boys share looks of confusion at my lack of acknowledgment. My orbs flit from one handsome face to the next. Are they all princes wearing the same cloaks of purple and gold? I register you all, I swear I think in my mess of a mind. My body is too exhausted, not being able to do anything but nod once. 

That’s all they needed to collect me it seems.

“Come, little bird.” The soft voice purrs again as I am being propped up gingerly, carefully by one of the boys around me. I lull my head against his warm body, a blanket or a cloak (I haven’t a clue which) was placed upon my dirty body. This boy is strong, not struggling to hold me up in the slightest I think as my eyelids flutter. I look up to him. He has long, black-as-night curly hair that falls around his neck, smiling tenderly down at me, his nose is long and rounded at the tip, a little mole under his lip catching my eyes that flutter more and more with every breath I take. Sleep was overtaking my body now that I know I am safe. “We will take you to a place where you will not suffer any longer.” 

And with that affirmation, I nestle closer in the arms of the strong, young boy, believing the prince-like voice that hums a sweet lullaby. I yawn while he continues stroking my matted, tangled hair as I fall fast asleep against this stranger's chest.

I miss the seven smiles and nods, drinking me in with their sparkling amber gazes.

---------

PART TWO 

[intothecocoverse]

Apologies to Andrew Garfield

Today marks the first week of No Way Home’s release so let’s celebrate it by showing you all how stupid I was by trusting my brain. Andrew, I know you will never read this but yolo. I AM SO SORRY.

If you didn’t have the chance to watch the movie yet, go away people, GO AWAY AND PLEASE WATCH IT ! Thank you ღ

.

.

I always thought I saw The Amazing Spider-Man. Always. I talked about Andrew as Spidey to my Twitter fam and friends, I UWUed when my friends used gifs of Andrew as Peter Parker, I always said “Tobey IS TOBEY, Andrew was super cool and Tom is nice too !” (No Offense to Tom Holland, he plays a good Spider-Man but his movies... Let’s just say I can’t wait for the future hum), I recognised Andrew’s Spidey suit right away when he came on screen in NWH. So yes, I really thought I watched TASM. I knew I didn’t watch the second one because me stupid and me back then didn’t like the way Electro was (I think.. I can’t remember now, I don’t trust my brain anymore) but that’s another story. But then, after watching NWH for the second time I decided to finish my Spider-Man Marathon started last month.... I only rewatched the first movie before last Wednesday. Yes, I know, I suck but to be honest I dislike my job a lot and all I wanna do when I come home is taking a nap. SO. I rewatched the second one then the third one (Why only the first and third ones are on Netflix Ireland ? Why ??? ANYHOO) and then on Saturday, I started to watch The Amazing Spider-Man and what was my surprise when I realized that I MIGHT HAVE NEVER WATCHED IT BEFORE ???! Some scenes were familiars but everything felt new at the same time. I mean, when you watch a movie of a character you like you always remember things right ? Like I have printed on my brain the scene when Green Goblin tries to kill Peter and in the end, kills accidentally himself. But here, nothing. Norman killing himself might not be a good example because maybe I was traumatized as a kid by it haha

In 2012, I was 16 when the movie was released, I came back to live with my mom in July and she is the one I always bring (brought...) to see superheroe movies... So why, back then, I didn’t go to the cinema with her and watch it ? I seriously thought I did ! Teenage me would have moved mountains for you, Andrew but mostly would have been very aroused because damn boy you’re fine as hell in those movies (and in general) but then again, that’s another story.

I don’t know if it’s because I saw too many footage of the movie which made me think that I watched it (just like I saw Gwen died but didn’t see the full scene until last Sunday - THE NOISE HER BODY MAKES HURTS MY HEART-) or knowing you as an actor before the movie came out did a trick on my mind. But yup, in the end, if my memory doesn’t play me again, I can say that I watched The Amazing Spider-Man for the first time last week despite saying that you were an Amazing Spider-Man (pun not intented) for years. I mean, this just shows how a great job you did because despite apparently not seeing the movies I thought you played Peter so well. However this makes me sad because I really thought I did and maybe by not seeing it before I didn’t support you as much I as could/should and this is why I am sorry. (Re ???)Watching it for the first time last week and seeing The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (the movie is called “The Amazing Spider-Man : The destiny of a hero” in French and I think that’s beautiful) made me realised that you are my favourite Spider-Man. And thinking that you never had a third movie probably because of the MCU makes me very sad. While watching the second opus, I could see that they had plans for your Peter and I read some articles which prove that as well. I know it might be too late or maybe you don’t want to or whatever reason you have but I really hope that we will be able to see you again as Peter Parker/Spider-Man in the future.... In The Amazing Spider-Man 3.

You deserve it. Your portray of Peter deserves it. The fans deserve it. 

(This post turned into a letter to Andrew, sorry not sorry)

I love the way you played Peter. The physicality you gave to him. AND THE HUMOUR. Oh God, I’m still not over the knife joke (If I had watched it before, I would have remembered this joke, right ??? RIGHT ???). No one could have said those jokes like you did. And Smart Peter. Oh yes. Yup, that’s my jam. And sad Peter. Broke my heart. Well, my mom just texted me that it seems that we watched it. I sent her a picture of Tobey to check if she didn’t mix up the two haha But if I didn’t watch the first one it would explain why I didn’t watch the second one... In the end, I still don’t know.

ANYWAY. I am sorry. I am sorry to my friends and acquaintances who shared their love for Andrew’s Peter and who taught me things, I am sorry to Sony for not giving them my money (ok my mom’s money) but mostly I am sorry to Andrew Garfield because we can see in No Way Home how happy he was to be back. How despite not playing this character for years he’s still got Peter in his system. It shows as well, how a good actor he is but this discussion is for another time. As I said earlier, I would have fought for you. Now, this letter is kinda it. If you’re in, let’s do a third movie Sony ! Tom’s Venom is not from Tom’s Peter universe or Tobey’s so... I mean...

To end this very long post which will interest absolutely no one :

I am just very thankful that I live during this time; three Peters meeting each other and just talking (and saving the universe). I’m taking this WAY too seriously but I grew up with Spider-Man, like a lot of you and failing at this made me disappointed in myself a bit.

To whoever read this until the end, sorry if there is any grammar or orthographic mistake, I can speak three languages but still suck at them three. I will now go to sleep because it’s 1am here, hoping that one day I’ll become a professional actor and say this boring story to the man himself. And maybe he will give me some tips about physicality, I know I talked about it already but I SWEAR comparing to other actors, he’s damn good at what he’s doing. Hope you all enjoyed No Way Home. A lot of rumors are spreading these days... Hopefully some will be true.

Take care people and Andrew, SORRY AGAIN !

P.S. : TASM 2 might not be perfect but calling it the worst Spider-Man movie ?? WHEN THERE IS THE FREAKING ITSY BITSY SONG ??? HOW DARE YOU PEOPLE ??? ALSO GWEN BEING LIKE “IT’S MY CHOICE” YES YES YES (rip TT)

P.S. 2 : I’m gonna regret posting this, it’s all messy because 3600 thoughts came into my head at the same time while I was writing it. I’ll forget about it when I’ll see No Way Home in IMAX this Friday, merry Christmas Eve to me. (Wish my mom was there)

[heeytwelve]

"That’s practically my type”

I remember someone really smart in internet was debating that Draco Malfoy has 100% chance to be Harry Potter’s boyfriend, cause he is, in fact his type. And if we look at Harry’s girlfriends, we kinda see the pattern (quidditch, outspoken, bravery, and have I mention quidditch? ).

But anyway, this post not about those, this post about how Chosen One of Carry On universe has his type too and why Agatha wasn’t just mistake of adolescence and how he changes his views on Baz when he become actively infatuated with him.

“I’ve wanted her since the first time I saw her—walking across the Great Lawn, her long pale hair rippling in the wind. I remember seeing her and thinking that** I’d never seen anything so beautiful.** And that if you were that beautiful, that graceful, nothing could ever really touch you. It would be like being a lion or a unicorn. Nobody could really touch you, because you wouldn’t even be on the same plane as everyone else. Even sitting next to Agatha makes you feel sort of untouchable. Exalted. It’s like sitting in the sun. So imagine how it feels to date her—like you’re carrying that light around with you all the time.

Let’s elaborate. He doesn’t fall in love with her - because of her academic success or because her parents rich or because she’s kind and caring. The type of attraction that works for Simon is so called - aesthetic attraction, attraction to beauty. 

And before you blame him for being shallow, I say, having strong preference for beauty is quite common among the artistic people, who grew up in desperate poverty, in small provinces, poor houses where beauty is rarity (for instance, famous ballet dancer Rudolph Nureyev was obsessed with beauty and collected a huge amount of beautiful things, because his poor childhood traumatised him). And, contrary to popular belief, Simon might have artistic tendencies, he sees beauty even dark creatures (goblins, *cough-cough* vampires), movements, colours and music.

Beauty for Simon is not a static thing to watch and enjoy the view, it’s not something he just want to own, it’s a force. Beauty protects him, it makes him untouchable, like nothing from of his previous (poor and mundane) life can touch him anymore, because he carrying the light, darkness will never reach him again. Agatha is not only his future, but also his shield. But - maybe it’s the same thing? Having future all sorted kinda shielding you from whatever you bump into.

He always mention her appearance whenever he talks about her - her clothes, her skin (”sparkles like she’s fairy”), her hair (multiple comparison with sun, light and halo). And when he decides to ignore the fact, that she quite possible betrayed him, it’s not only because he fear uncertain future but:

“She’s beautiful. And I want her. I want everything to be fine.”

Beauty as an attraction, beauty as a shield. Beauty is stability.

Now, before we talk about what all of this has to do with Baz, let’s bring up this quote:

“Like when I used to dream about becoming a footballer someday—or that my parents, my real parents, were going to come back for me.… My dad would be a footballer. And my mum would be some posh model type. ...

But we always missed you, Simon,” they’d say. “We’ve been looking for you.” And then they’d take me away to live in their mansion.”

I know, you probably roll your eyes now, like it’s stereotypical thing for poor kid in care to dream of, but isn’t that interesting, that Simon practically give us description of his future boyfriend and girlfriend as his dream parents? Now, don’t get me wrong, there is now perversion here, it’s just people he dreams to be with. People who potentially get him out of this awful reality and of course he will imagine them as the best people he can imagine - hence attraction to exactly those people. Now, we already know, that Agatha is beautiful as a model and she’s posh -Simon dwells how she good with regattas, polo matches, galas and he’s not posh enough for it. And right there, in next sentence, he mentions the only person who’s fit this interior - Baz. And let’s not forget about this:

“Baz walked into our room, much taller than me—and posher than everyone.”

There’s two interesting thing you notice when you will read Simon’s view for Baz. Simon never hesitates to use bold colours to describe how good Baz is. He never even doubts it, and Simon is not in submissive mode by any means. It’s just with Agatha - he sees the beauty and he admires it. But because Baz is evil, a threat (and potentially because he convinced that he’s heterosexual) AND Simon can’t just go in “I want him” mode, like he did with Agatha.  There’s a big quote above about how Simon met Agatha and here’s one about how Simon met Baz:

“and Baz was walking towards me. Looking so cool. Like he was coming my way because he wanted to, not because there was a mystical magnet in his gut.”

Though, it is looks, Simon talks about, I want to emphasise, that while Simon is not in active infatuation phase with Baz, he still unleashes his other attraction type, attraction to power/strength. Here and in quote below he indicates one of Baz biggest powers - ability to look unfazed and perfect no matter what. Power of composure.

“but he looked fine to me—not a hair out of place. Typical.”

Back to father being footballer. One might wonder, why violinist and person so into academic success went to be the lead player in sports team? All popular movies tell us that you either this (nerd) or that (jock), and Baz suddenly both. Because he’s perfect. And because he has his personality and vampire personality. One might also wonder, had Baz overheard Simon’s obsession about being footballer/football in general before deciding to enrol to the team and collect all trophies... Anyway. Baz as footballer:

“He’s the same on the field as he is everywhere else. Strong. Graceful. Fucking ruthless.”

If you ask me, this is where Simon shows a bit his infatuation. Yes, attraction to strength, even ruthlessness (Simon is a fighter, he does appreciate good fighter too). But graceful - is about beauty. You see, I think, maybe because Simon carries traditional values he kinda does that thing: women’s modus operandi is beauty, men’s - strength, ruthlessness. Same with his parents - mum is model, father is fighter footballer. That’s ok.  BUT when he starts to consider (even at the back of his mind) Baz as a romantic partner (it’s all starts when he sees that Baz is not a monster, that he’s a boy), he starts to notice his beauty more, than strength.

“He floats out over the moat and lands on the other side. It’s the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen.”

Infamous jeans scene, where Simon talking about Baz’ clothes (like he did w/Agatha) and literally checking out his arse:

“they do look like really expensive jeans. Dark. And snug from his waist to his ankles without looking tight.”

He starts to watch him aesthetically:

“I put my hand on his chest. I don’t have to step any closer to reach him. ... Baz swallows and licks his grey-pink lower lip. .. “he throws one of his pillows into my face. (It smells like him.)

“I’m watching him read—I swear he sucks on his fangs when he’s thinking.

The culmination of this development comes with “vampire club scene”:

““Every one of them must be so jealous of him. He’s everything they are, plus magic. Plus he looks the part, like he was born to be some sort of dark king.”

“Those vampires were in awe of you,” I say. “They wanted to put a crown on your head.

He has the skills AND he is royally beautiful. And Simon projecting his feelings to those night club vampires. The longer they in relationships, the more Simon dwelling on Baz beauty, just to show you this development, I’ll quote WS for a moment:

“I’ll be damned if he doesn’t look half glamourous. Like a boy Marilyn Monroe.… My brain gets kind of stuck on “boy Marilyn Monroe” for a while.”

...

“Baz casts his eyes down and smiles—girlishly, I would have said, but on him it’s not girlish. It’s, I don’t know, vulnerable.”

To elaborate, Marilyn Monroe is depiction of feminine beauty in popular culture and description of Baz as a bit feminine is something that would never happen in the beginning of “Carry On” setting. Of course, Baz opened up more to Simon (and this is important), but also Simon willing to see, no, he actually quite hungrily looking for this beauty. He is attracted to this kind of beauty AND I think, might be cause of his somewhat traditional views, he automatically looking for this in Baz, when he considering him as a partner. 

BUT. Again as in WS - Baz being powerful and strong AND that being attractive (and arousing) to Simon is not going anywhere.  So Simon’s type qualities - strength and beauty. (Not smartness and kindness, sorry Penny) though he does appreciate it.  And lastly, let’s go back to Agatha. We talked about her beauty, but she’s also an athlete. A competitive one. 

“I smile again and jump up off the bed, grabbing a pair of jeans and a purple sweatshirt that says WATFORD LACROSSE. (Agatha plays.)”

This sweatshirt Simon will proudly wear even in WS (Baz haven’t confiscated them yet :D ) - and if you think about it, it’s the way to show admiration too. And don’t forget the horse sports, she’s even more into sports than Baz (Baz would spend his summer practicing languages and violin - I believe his main passion, and football is just to unwind and fuck w/Simon, while Agatha would harvest prizes or skills in competitions). OK, no, he does play tennis :D So yes - as absolutely legit Simon’s type - Agatha do has these two qualities. They both do. Though not exactly in same proportions. Agatha radiates beauty, feminine beauty, you don’t have to watch closely to see it, it punches you in a face. But Baz is more powerful, as with Agatha, you don’t have to search for his power, it’s just there. And maybe this shift in quality proportions is what Simon needs at the end. But he certainly needs both. And let me finish this lenthy dwelling off with Baz quote, where he accidentally compares himself tells us this qualities proportions in Agatha:

“Wellbelove isn’t very powerful, but she’s gorgeous.”

There is interesting awareness between these two, but I will have a mercy and talk about it later.

[mapleandgingeroatmeal]

CR2E76-Refjorged

HOLY SHIT THIS EPISODE HAD EVERYTHING. WHERE DO I EVEN START?? This is gonna be a long one for sure.

The spontaneous Mead Pong game was so fun. I love how they all just went for that, and Caleb getting a perfect shot only when nobody was watching? Priceless.

They haven’t really done a heist w/ Caduceus. have they? Unless you count boarding that one ship, but I don’t think you can since that wasn’t a stealth thing. It’s weird, but that detail felt like almost a mark of how far the Nein have come already

I’m sure people have written a lot about this (I’d love meta recs if anyone has ‘em), but that makes me think about what may have changed about the m9′s path if Molly had stayed alive. Clay has been such a huge force in pushing the nein to do good in the world, and although he has plenty of his own issues, I think the fact that he believes in everyone’s ability to be good people has really had a huge impact. This may be a Hot Take, maybe I’ll regret this cause idk what Molly fans are like, but I really don’t think the group would have made nearly as much moral and emotional progress w out Caduceus. They would probably be at least a lot closer to crossing over that line into Bad People.

THE BREAD. This is another famous joke that I new existed, but had no context or knowledge for. I was so excited when I heard it come up! Caleb and polymorph is such a delightful combo. The dumb brain really lets him escape his misery I think, and he had such a gleeful face and relaxed posture for that whole scene.

“Last time we did this, you put a sword to my throat”. Whatta callback! Despite how much everything has changed, Fjord and Caleb still have this interesting intensity to their relationship. The moment when they start a mysterious blood ritual and Caleb’s accent confrontation come to mind. I hope we get more in the future about how these two interact in a more casual setting, tbh, because at this point I have a hard time pinning down their dynamic. The trust is definitely there now, and all the Nein obviously love each other, but in many ways it feels almost delicate? Like in the scene from this ep, I think both of them probably reflect on that day thinking they were in the right, even if they’ve moved on. Interesting stuff!

The reactions when Nott murdered that guard were so priceless. Little moments like that are kinda sobering reminders of how broken she is. Since probably the moment that Veth killed that Goblin leader with a vile of acid, she’s led a life that seems to have been very much kill-or-be-killed. Empire people aren’t taught to see Goblins as much more than kill-on-sight monsters, and in a self-defense situation Nott is so small that she would really have only one chance before getting overpowered. It’s upsetting and definitely bad, but I think it makes a lot of sense that her first instinct when panicked is to go for the throat.

Caduceus is truly such a dummy and I love him for it. The man knows two things: Death and People. Nothing else. Strategy? Never heard of her. High-stakes stealth mission with an important decision to make? “it’s always nice to see my friends :)”. 

Whats in the book they stole! We didn’t find out for the entire episode if I’m not mistaken! Caleb just gave to Fjord with some cryptic comments! Wtf kind of book isn’t useful/ interesting to Caleb? This is going to drive me insane.

The pack-rat elf lady wearing Reani’s crown finally was v sweet. She was a character that Matt seemed to hint at a lot of depth for. I wonder if we’ll ever get back to Uthadorn? I’d like to see her again

The dusts are also a bunch of npcs that I kinda wish we’d gotten more time with! The way that Matt had the whole family and their personalities mapped out makes me feel like there was a lot that didn’t get explored there. Clay has a tendency to minimize his own priorities and as much as it’s a neat character choice, I wish it didn’t mean that we see less of the neat stuff around his arc!

Fjord’s dream sequence had me tearing up. Matt’s writing is just so emotionally intelligent and deep. The specification that the Wild Mother can ease the pain but the wound will always be there? That hit me so goddamn hard. I love this character. 

If I think too much about what this sword-collecting arc means for Fjord I’m gonna start crying again. Here’s a guy that grew up unloved, with nobody that ever cared enough to give him anything. He was so recently convinced that the Nein only cared about him while he was useful. And what happens once he looses all utility to the group? They give him magic weapons, and circle around to protect him, and face down a fucking ancient white dragon, all just to get him a gift from the Wild Mother. What does that feel like to a man who’s never ever had a family before? Can he even really recognize the kind of devotion the m9 just displayed? I hope once he has a quiet moment he can do some reflection and appreciate how much he is just unconditionally supported now. I want him to understand that he is loved.

Beau and Reani! I did remember right! They are adorable and everyone’s reaction at the table was priceless. That moment had a neat meta-level feel to it w/ the addition of Mica as a guest character. I could tell she was feeling out if this was a role-play boundary or not, just like Reani was feeling out if Beau was interested. Beau going in for the kiss out of nowhere was also Marisha signaling “yes please bang my hot gay monk”. A perfect ending for a wonderful character!

Jester and Caduceus almost judgy convo was actually fascinating to me, because it kinda highlighted one of my favorite things about Beau in that she breaks the norms arounf sexualy agency that you usually see with female charecters. She’s an action movie protag, casually banging hot ladies and hiring sex workers, and she’s celebrated for it like you would celebrate that behavior in james bond! I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a female character that does that before.

I could talk about Caleb and Nott’s conversation here for fucking hours, and I think I’m gonna actually do a whole separate post about it so this doesn’t get too long. Why is every interaction they have just the most poignant beautiful incredible moment ever committed to film?  What did the world do to deserve this? Nothing. We do not deserve them. 

Fjord getting his powers back and celebrating and the callback to Nott turning into a tiny Fjord and Eldritch Blaaaaaaayyyst returning and being wrapped up in seaweed and awkwardly objectified by Jester and Caduceus big goofy grin and all of it was such a joyful, hopeful note to end on! More than ever the Nein are feeling like a family, with all the wonderful messy things that entails, and I couldn’t be happier about it. I’m going to go watch Nott and Caleb and cry again.

[fandomsfeelsandfanfics]

Strangers/// Draco Malfoy x Reader

SUMMARY: Two losts souls meet late at night at a bar then they find each other and find themselves on the shores of a secluded beach.

WORD COUNT: 2k

WARNING(S): a little angst if you squint, kinda steamy but it’s not smut i swear, drinking, swimming in their undies lol

A/N: this may be one of the best things i’ve ever written but I can’t tell. 

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

   He sat two seats down from you on the bar. He seemed to be alone and you figured he liked it that way. You tried to leave him alone, you really did. But there was just something so compelling about him. 

   Your eyes kept trailing over to him. He had his eyes trained on the half empty glass in front of him. His fingers trailed around the rim as he seemed to let his mind wander. You couldn’t help but notice his slightly disheveled hair and the stubble that was growing on his chin. He wore an expensive watch and unwrinkled buttonup shirt but otherwise seemed completely unkept.

   At some point, he noticed you staring at him and his eyes swept over to you. His cold blue eyes bore into yours. His eyebrows drew up slightly in question. 

   You turned away quickly, pretending that you weren’t staring but you had been caught very obviously. You could feel his eyes on you as you pretended to focus very intently at a spot on the bar in front of you. 

   “Would you like to join me?” You finally looked back at him. He stared at you expectantly, waiting for your response.

   You smiled at his offer. “No thank you, I’m fine.” 

   You watched as he turned to look at the row of drinks in front of him. “I’ve seen you watching me all night,” he said casually. “I just figured...” He let the rest of his sentence trail off and instead concluded it with a shrug. He looked back over at you with his head tilted. 

   And there it was again. Something about you wanted to get to know him. You’d never seen anyone that looked quite like him with his pale complexion and bright blue eyes that drew you in. Then there was that accent. He clearly wasn’t from around here. 

   “So,” he asked. He had this playful glint in his eyes. Finally, you let your curiousity get the best of you. 

   You rose from your seat and came down the bar toward him. He watched you walk toward him, carefully eyeing your every movement. When you finally took the seat next to him, your eyes met his for a moment. 

   He cleared his throat and brought his glass back up to his mouth, finishing it off. He turned to you and said, “can I get you anything to drink?” 

   “No thank you.” He shrugged as if to say ‘suit yourself’. 

   His arm went up, motioning the for the bartender. His sleeve was pulled up to his elbows and as soon as his arm came up you noticed the mark that was there. A faded image of a skull with a snake portruding out of it. 

  You’d heard about that mark before and about the wizards who had it. But you’d never met anyone with it in person. You were expecting some big scary wizard but were met with him, who was nothing but gentleness underneath that boyish charm.

  When the goblin from behind the counter finally walked over to him he ordered a Firewhiskey. You both sat in silence, watching him pour the drink. Once the goblin was finished he pushed it across the bar to him and walked off to the next customer.

  He grabbed the glass and took a sip before setting it back down and looking at you. “I’m Draco.”

  He held out his hand and you took it, immediately noticing how soft his hand felt against yours. “(Y/N).” You let your hand fall from his and laid it gently in your lap. “You’re a long way from home, Draco.”

  That was the understatement of the year. A British wizard all the way in Berkeley, California. He was thousands and thousands of miles from home.

  He shrugged nonchalantly. “I suppose, I am.” He took another sip of his drink and you saw his face twist up slightly as it stung the back of his throat.

  “Are you waiting on anyone,” he asked curiously, setting his drink back down on the bar.

  You shook your head. “Are you?”

  “Nope.”

  “Then I suppose I’ll just have to keep you company, hmm?” You nudged him in the shoulder playfully. He smiled into his cup as he finished off his drink.

  “I suppose you will.”

-

   When Draco saw you earlier that night, he thought you were absolutely gorgeous. He thought maybe, just maybe he’d be able to take you home that night. But it seemed to be turning into much more than that. Small talk turned into deeper conversation and then it was two in the morning and the bar was kicking the two of you out on the streets. And now Draco was letting you lead him wherever the hell you wanted.

   You pulled Draco by his hand through a thick brush of woods. “Where the hell are you taking me,” he chuckled behind you.

  You didn’t reply, which he was partially glad you didn’t. Something about the unknown of the situation made him all that more willing to follow. Even if you were leading him into his untimely death, well, he thinks he’d let you. He thought he’d let you lead him to the ends of the Earth if that’s what you wanted.

  After walking a few more feet, you rounded a tree and he realized exactly where you were taking him. With a gasp he stood on the white sand looking out toward the ocean.

 You let go of his hand and turned to look at him with an excited smile.

  “Where are we,” he asked. His eyes swept across the sand, moving carefully along every curve and dip in the Earth. His eyes landed on the spot where the waves met the sand and as a wave came in with a crash, he let out a small breath.

  “Private beach.”

  His eyebrows lowered and he took a step toward you. “And how exactly do you find a place like?”

  You gave him a smirk. “By knowing the right people.” You wiggled your eyebrows playfully. Draco took another step toward you but you backed away from him. You turned toward the ocean and began taking off your shoes. Once they were off you took off toward the shoreline.

  Draco watched you run toward the ocean, his eyes widening slightly as you pulled your dress over your head. You let an exhilarated yell as you felt the cold wind sweep across your torso.

  When you turned around to meet his eye, Draco was nearly breathless. He could feel his heart beating an unsteady rhythem in his chest as his eyes roamed across your skin. His eyes came back up to your face quickly as he tried to swallow the lump in his throat.

  You cupped your hands around your mouth to amplify your voice and shouted, “Come on.”

  He didn’t need to be told twice. Immediately at the sound of your voice, Draco was running toward you, kicking up sand behind him. He tugged off his shoes in a hurry and struggled to hop out of his pants.

  He ran clumsily through the sand barely able to keep upright with the mix of alcohol and adrenaline running through his system. He watched the water lap at your heels and then your ankles as you ventured backwards into the sea.

  His fingers hurriedly undid the buttons on his shirt just enough that he could pull it over his head. He came barreling toward you, barely even noticing how cold the water was. It was up to his waist by the time he got to you and swept you up into his arms.

  You giggled as you wrapped your arms around his neck. His lips came crashing against yours like the waves crashing into the shore.

  You breathed him in, taking everything, anything he would give you. Your lips moved together effortlessly as he pressed his body against yours.

  Draco broke away, looking at you in the moonlight that barely illuminated the two of you. You were both shrouded in darkness, completely alone. For a moment, Draco entertained the thought that you two were the only people left on the planet.

  What a lovely idea that was.

  A wave came in, splashing you both on the side of the face. You laughed shrilly and Draco spun you in the water. He’d never seen anyone this beautiful.

  He’d never seen anyone like this. Never really taken the time to look at anyone the way he looked at you. Watching you smile under the moonlight as water droplets run down your cheek and hair clung to your shoulder.

  He’d never wanted to know someone as bad as he wanted to know you. He wanted to unravel every inch of your soul and explore every fold of your brain. No matter how long it took. No matter what it took. He’d do it, if only you’d let him.

  He looked into your eyes. You weren’t laughing anymore, you were staring back at him just as intensely. He didn’t want to ask, not really, because a part of him was afraid of the answer.

  But his eyes still silently implored: would you let me? Would you let me know you?

  You leaned back into him, pressing your lips against his. An unspoken but indefinite yes.

-

  Hours later, you and Draco laid in the sand as the sun came over the horizon. He gave you his shirt when you started to shiver. Then the two of you just laid there. His back pressed against your chest and his arm thrown lazily around your waist.

  You traced the outline of the snake on his forearm and he watched your finger trail across it.

  “Will you tell me about it,” you asked quietly.

  Draco thought about it for a moment. He knew you’d ask eventually, he just hoped it wouldn’t be this early. He didn’t want you to know that side of him, not yet. It might scare you off.

  You looked over your shoulder at him, waiting for his response. He bit his lip before finally saying, “Yeah, I’ll tell you.”

  You turned your body over so that you were face to face and prepared for the story.

  He took a deep breath and began. “When I was younger there was a war. There were things I thought I understood...things I thought I knew. My family was on the wrong side of things but I didn’t know that at the time so I just followed along and I did what a good son does.” He paused for a moment looking over at his mark.

  “It doesn’t go away, you know. I’ve tried spells, I’ve tried potions, I’ve tried everything but it doesn’t go away. I thought I could get away from everything...from myself if I got out of England. But that...follows you. A constant reminder of what a piece of shit you are.”

  “Draco…” He averted his eyes suddenly because he couldn’t bear looking at you in that moment. You placed your hand gently on his jaw and guided his face back toward you.

  “People aren’t just collections of their mistakes.” He chuckled bitterly. “I’m serious. Humans are made of all this love and compassion and too many wonderful things to reduce themselves to their mistakes.”

  You leaned closer to him, looking him directly in the eyes. “You are not your mistakes.” You could see this disconnect in his eyes like he wanted to believe you but just couldn’t. Maybe he didn’t believe you this time but you’d tell him as many times as it took.

  You rested your head against his chest with a sigh. Draco’s arms wrapped around you tighter, almost afraid to let go.

[sullyoonas]

Hi!!! *waves* I'm curious what your top dramas were this year! I feel like I didn't watch enough of them this year, hahaha, and I want to catch more before the year's over. Could you please can share your full list OR top 10 rec's? whichever you'd like. thank u!! :)

*waves back* HELLOOOOOOO, (I just woke up, sorry if I'm answering a little late)

I love this question, let me list out my top ten this year (some didn't come out this year though, basically the ones I watched these year and loved)

Be Melodramatic/Melo is my Nature : I never shutup about that drama, I'm not recommending it because doyoung's brother was there xD (funniest thing is I didn't know doyoung and gongmyung were related until very recently, I've been watching kdramas since 2015). I feel like Be Melodramatic is a must watch for everyone, because you know kdramas these days are very repetitive but this one? No absolutely not. There's the right amount of humour, representation of powerful platonic bonds, GIRL POWER??? YESSS, talk of mental health, and most importantly the realistic-ness of life. It's a must watch, and easily my favourite of all kdramas I watched the last five years.

Hotel Del Luna: (my thoughts will get shorter from now because like I said, I just woke up 😭) I'll just say, if any drama as IU in it, you watch it. It was wonderful, a hotel for people who passed away??? YES.

Search WWW: Initially I struggled a lot with this drama because dramas that deal with office work, hurts my brain. But when I kept watching it, I actually had to cry a lot. Another kdrama that emphasizes the importance of feminism and platonic bonds!!! There's also romance!!

Touch your heart: I loved Goblin when I first watched it, so imagine my surprise when I got to know that the second lead couple had a whole drama of their own??? (You don't have to watch goblin to watch touch your heart, they are not related at all). This one was the right amount of sweetness and romance! Cute

The World Of The Married: Ah this, I'll just say, just when you think maybe things won't get any worse, it does. (This one kept me watching it for hours straight it was SO GOOD)

A Piece of Your Mind: Makesure you have loads of tissues for this one. It's heartbreakingly beautiful, the kind that makes you heart ache throughout the whole series.

It's Okay Not to Be Okay: I really truly love this drama with every fibre of my being, yes I'm sure you saw the hype for it, the hype is VERY valid. Pls watch.

Prison Playbook: A renowned baseball pitcher ends up in jail for something he did (which I won't say, just know he did well🤷🏽‍♀️) It's pure chaos and every episode has an important message.

Extracurricular: you know what? Just watch it. The suffering is still clear on my mind 😭

Moment of 18: High school drama but such a sweet storyline! You'll like it hopefully

There were more but I need to freshen up and currently these are all my brain remembers. I hope this helped!!! 💓💓💓

And I'll share my full list when the year ends, hopefully I'll end up watching a few more by then.

[kpophours]

a very necessary guide to SF9

so. let’s talk about these underrated kings. be prepared for rambling. I just love them too much. my favorite boys, 10/10 would recommend stanning them.

some basic information

9 members (5 vocals, 4 rappers, 9 dancers and 9 visuals just stating the facts)

SF9 stands for Sensational Feeling 9

debuted on October 5, 2016 with Fanfare (still a BOP)

currently under FNC Entertainment and actually their first male dance group

their official fandom name is Fantasy (such a good name, honestly) and the official color is Fantasia Hologram (aka the  p r e t t i e s t).

debuted after winning a survival show called Dance or Band (they participated as the dance team; the band team debuted as Honeyst in 2017)

7 mini albums so far with RPM being their latest comeback 

... now onto the members (buckle up)!

Youngbin

Kim Youngbin, born on November 23, 1993

LeaderBin aka the Dad™

very charismatic, be prepared for some really intense eye contact (two words: stage presence)

rapper (highest rapping voice out of the four of them)

D A N C E R (a former 1MILLION dance studio trainee), so he‘s obviously 1/3 of sf9′s extremely talented dance line

also 1/3 of hyung line

cutest eye-smile (so soft) + cutest giggle™

rocked his red hair and looks amazing with slightly curled hair (do not fight me on this)

is tattooed (very  p r e t t y)

threatens everyone’s bias at least once

gives amazing (and unnecessary long) pep talks together with Jaeyoon (just let the other boys sleep, please)

gazes so, so fondly at all his members in pretty much every video (no, I will NOT cry)

Jaeyoon is his roommate and secret wife.

Inseong

Kim Inseong, born on July 12, 1993

the oldest (not mentally) aka the Grandpa™

main vocal (those HIGH NOTES, damn). extremely steady voice.

unique beauty. looks a bit like a desert fox (according to himself and everyone with a pair of functioning eyes).

1/3 of extra line (see and hear three loud idiots in all their videos? yep, that’s him ft. Jaeyoon and Dawon)

also 2/3 of hyung line

v e r y intelligent and educated (holds a degree in Journalism and Communication) but also stupid

owner of an extremely cute smile 

t h i g h s  i am not weak or biased at all

SF9’s designated English speaker (used to live in London for a year)

amazing winking-ability, 10/10 will leave you weak-kneed

King of Lies. he’ll probably never pass a lie detector test. but it’s okay we still love him.

is left-handed and really good at drawing

married to Jaeyoon (it‘s complicated).

Jaeyoon

Lee Jaeyoon, born on August 9, 1994

3/3 of hyung line

honey voice (aka OST King)

d i m p l e s.

blindingly white teeth. the most beautiful smile (canines!).

very proud of his hips and butt (as he should be).

his actual name is Ethan

likes to work out and is  f i t (he ended all Fantasies during rpm promotions, so thanks for that)

King of girl group dances and in charge of sexy (Zumba) dances

a  fuc ki ng  tease (again, rip all Fantasies during the UNIXERSE rpm stage)

2/3 of extra line (shares one brain cell with Inseong and Dawon. they don’t use it very often.)

had a pink undercut during the Mamma Mia era and probably made people cry with his outstanding beauty. again, i’m not biased at all

seems a bit shy and quiet at first. don’t be fooled. he is loud and will come for you.

married to both Inseong and Youngbin.

Dawon

Lee Sanghyuk, born on July 24, 1995

oh boy... such a bundle of utter chaos.

e x t r a (3/3 of extra line and probably their President™)

hear something loud and annoying in the background? it’s probably (most definitely) Dawon (helped by the other 2/3 of extra line)

a unique and beautiful voice (he needs more lines or else I’ll throw hands) - rapping, singing, screaming, he can do it all.

a fucking tease 2.0 (seriously, he and Jaeyoon need to be stopped)

Bruce Lee impressions on point

has tattoos

such a meme-face but also so handsome, like H O W

looks amazing and so soft with curly hair must protect

had so many different hair styles during their Mamma Mia promotions, rip his hair (and rip to all new Fantasies trying to keep track lol)

actually very soft. cried when Inseong surprised them during their UNIXERSE concert (which our Grandpa couldn’t participate in due to an injury)

likes to bully Taeyang.

Zuho

Baek Juho, born on July 4, 1996

Mr. Deep Ass Voice™

“my nose is my swag“

such a good dancer, definitely underappreciated. 

looks intimidating at first, but is actually the softest (d u a l i t y)

the best cat dad (Huru has yet to accept his undying love for him though)

composes/produces own songs (@FNC: please, I’m b e g g i n g you to finally put Champagne on an album) and writes lyrics for a lot of sf9′s songs

didn‘t participate in most of their Enough promotions due to his (still ongoing) back problems (#FNCletZuhoRestChallenge2019)

a dork and meme and honestly just so, so cute and lovable

social butterfly (seriously, he‘s friends with literally e v e r y idol out there)

composed a (love) letter to Fantasy while driving a car with Hwiyoung, Taeyang and Dawon sleeping in the passenger and backseat yes I cried

a scaredy cat (ran away and left his members behind when he got scared by a staff member during their Trip with Fantasy)

Rowoon

Kim Seokwoo, born on August 7, 1996

yes he‘s a Tree™. is made up of 90% unnecessary long legs.

main vocal 2.0

1/2 of actor line

very handsome, I know (but he‘s so much more than just his good looks)

a devoted mom of 8

loves all Chanis and not-Chanis equally

almost had a mental breakdown because he managed to hit Chani’s face with a football which resulted in his precious maknae getting a nosebleed

always hugging and kissing and generally just smothering all members with his endless love and affection (especially Chani)

(t) h o t  and knows it (very shy with fanboys though)

has literally only one selfie angle he uses rigorously  

his One True Talent™ is staring sexily into the camera and doing nothing else because yes, he’s just that handsome

tries to be funny and fails most of the time, but he‘s cute so it’s okay.

Taeyang

Yoo Taeyang, born on February 28, 1997

undercover main vocal (has almost as many lines as Inseong and Rowoon)

best dancer, period. his entire body is probably made out of water. such. fluid. moves. - 2/3 of dance line, often in charge of choreographies.

also 1/3 of maknae line

speaks in ᵀᴵᴺʸ ᶠᴼᴺᵀ 

the literal Sun™, his smile has healing properties.

has great hair and pushes it back a lot during his dance moves

a flower boy (literally. wanted to become a florist before debuting as an idol)

looks a bit like Lee Dongwook aka The Reaper from Goblin

you think he‘s soft? uh, sure, yeah. but is also s a v a g e (the personification of that then perish meme)

has a... unique way of drying his hair (ask Dawon, he‘ll show you. even if you don’t want him to, Dawon will show you)

gets bullied by Dawon. bullies him back. very spot-on impressions of Mr. Extraness (as seen on their Weekly Idol episode)

soulmates and married to Hwiyoung, I don’t make the rules.

Hwiyoung

Kim Youngkyun, born May 11, 1999

rapper and Mr. Charismatic™

yes he is that guy from their Now or Never mv 

looks bad-ass but is a certified baby boy (2/3 of maknae line)

cute without trying and is actually a cat

has literally the best gummy smile which he used to hide behind his hands (but his hyungs encouraged him so much and now he smiles openly, I am not crying, you are)

grew up so suddenly and had long hair out of nowhere and left everyone sh o ok (should definitely be in a shampoo commercial)

composes songs. put one on SoundCloud just very recently. writes lyrics for a lot of sf9′s songs.

cried during their survival show when he got scolded for continuing to mess up the choreography and had to be hugged by Youngbin (who really is the best dad™)

King of the Cleopatra game thanks to his dolphin screams should probably be part of vocal line

pretended to not recognize his soulmate and roommate aka Taeyang when he had to guess his members from their hands while wearing a blindfold. Taeyang will probably never recover from this betrayal and is most definitely still whining about it.

Chani

Kang Chanhee, born on January 17, 2000

deep ass voice 2.0

d a n c e r (his little solo dance in Now or Never will forever be superior), 3/3 of dance line

Evil Maknae™ (3/3 of maknae line)

2/2 of actor line (yes he‘s that boy from Sky Castle)

speaks fluent duck

Taemin‘s Nº fanboy (literally knows his blood type, like... wow okay)

can‘t remember any of the members birthdays (he actually thought Youngbin was born in August when his birthday is literally in the middle of Winter. Leaderbin was hurt).

always looks like a smol bean, but everyone else is just ridiculously tall

had bright orange hair once only for about one second though lol

constantly smothered with love and hugs from Rowoon and pretends to hates it

has all his hyungs wrapped around his finger and knows it (they‘re all whipped for him, especially when he’s doing aegyo)

has a lot of hair aka (my favorite) coconut head (#freehisforehead2019)

looks expressionless and tired 24/7 (a whole mood and true gen z)

some videos to watch

all of their mv’s of course

literally every comeback stage

the suit versions of Now or Never and RPM

the ghost prank/horror version of Now or Never (I cried laughing) 

this really cute Dingo Music version of Enough 

basically all their dance practices, but especially K.O. (we all know they should have gone viral with that choreography)

their adorable pajama version of Different

them performing RPM on a treadmill (Chani is a mood™ and Inseong’s grandpa waddle is so cute)

these stunning acoustic versions of their songs brought to you by 2/3 of extra line + The Tree™

their kcon New York 2019 performance (+ their cover of Love Shot)

their reality show Trip with Fantasy 

them dancing to O Sole Mio ft. Ostriches

their episodes on Weekly Idol and Idol Room

their girl group cover dance battle on Weekly Idol (ft. Cross Gene)

Rowoon and Inseong on Masked Singer

Dawon on Weekly Idol as part of the Masked Idol segment

the Now or Never choreography ft. dance line and the 1MILLION dance crew

them covering BTS’ Boy in Luv + EXO’s Call Me Baby

the Idol Dance Cover Challenge of Love Shot (ft. Astro, The Boyz and CIX)

this interview (I mean, that title alone... lol)

those are just a few of my favorite videos - there’s so much more content out there, so you’ll definitely never starve, lol.

I could literally ramble on about these nine incredible men for hours on end. 

But this will be the end of my guide (it’s long enough already, lol).

Stan SF9 for (clear skin and good grades) nine hard-working and so, so talented individuals with amazing voices, incredible dance moves, outstanding visuals, chaotic energies and a lot of meme-worthiness.

You won’t regret it, I promise.

(Don’t worry, Rowoon(’s face) is okay).

[masterlist] | [requests] 

[trixcuomo]

The Kaja-Cola Flava Girls Reunite

((Welcome to my very fangirl headcanon for Trixany and my femme alts. Something cute, needlessly complex, and over-the-top for you to enjoy <3...))

Daily Mail Org: Zug zug folks, here we have it! Hot off the presses... the Kaja-Cola’s premier girl-band that helped spread the message of this exceptional Goblin party drink beyond Kezan, beyond Goblin lands, and tear into new world markets... And I mean literally, last week. They almost danced a man to death on the Stormwind tram in order to sell him Kaja-Cola... They’re back! In The Daily Mail Org studio today, we have all six of the original Flava Girls. Well, not so original--the newest addition, lucky lady number seven, is a beautiful Nightborne goddess.

Arcana Mama: Haha--yes, Arcana Mama. That would be me.

Daily Mail Org: Wow, she even has a sweet speaking voice.

Flava Girls: *all giggle and cheer*

Daily Mail Org: This is amazing. Your old fans, especially the Trixany Cuomo fangirls and fanboys out there, have to be thrilled. Today, the Flava Girls are officially no longer a throw-back.

Trixany: That sounds a little insulting, you know. We’re just grown--we’re all full-grown ladies! *laughs* We know what we want and we’re not taking any prisoners this time. Right, ladies?

Flava Girls: *wild cheers, wolf-whistle*

Daily Mail Org: Oh, of course! That’s what I meant. And Trixany has been the lead singer. It’s her successful parody career that ignited the spark for the Flava Girls to come back, am I right? You wanna talk about that, Trixany?

Trixany: Well, it’s no secret that the band sort of went its own way when I broke out. I wanted to go solo, see what I could do. But the girls were always there for me, we kept in touch...

Daily Mail Org: Uh, really? You destroyed their careers single-handed and we’re supposed to believe you were having wine-and-cheese nights, holding hands, crying on each other’s shoulders?

Mega Meghan Mango: *husky Tauren voice* Spiritually, we were always connected. Even when we weren’t talking to each other, we were attuned to what was going on in each other’s lives. The band wouldn’t be here today if I didn’t get on the scrying orb one time and tell Trixany, “Look. I can see what that rivalry with Haris Pilton is doing to you. I can see it crushing your soul, Trix. This isn’t you.”

Trixany: Oh my gods, she’s so right. I can’t believe I forgot about that! Now I remember, that was Meghan and Jojo, right? Where’s Mojo Jojo? Why are you sitting way back there, girl? Come on, scoot up so they can see you.

From left to right: Mojo Jojo (Troll), Shuga Slam (Orc), Fiesta LimeTrixany (Blood Elf), Cocoa Crush (Goblin), Mega Meghan Mango (Tauren).

Mojo Jojo: *chill Troll voice* Ya, ya, mon. Dat was me and Meghan. I asked miss Trixany-mon, ‘What joo gonna do about dat nasty richmon Haris? Dis needs to stop right hea, right now.”

Trixany: And Jojo, you said something about a loa... By the Sunwell, I can’t remember that part exactly, it was good too--

Org Daily Mail: Did Mojo Jojo try to sign you up with Bwonsamdi, Trixany? That sounds more like a career-ending move to me.

Mojo Jojo: *cackles wildly*

Trixany: That’s not at all what she did--

Mojo Jojo: No, no. I tol’ her that she betta make a bargain with Kimbul quick so the tiga loa can tear dat witch up for spreadin’ dose rumors.

Arcana Mama: Oh my word... No she didn’t!

Shuga Slam: *orcish accent* Yes, she did. She did it for the Horde!

Trixany: Hahaha...

Cocoa Crush: *goblin siprano* Yeah, that’s totally something Trix would do anyway on her own. If not Kimbul, then she would have paid the Goblin mob or something--

Trixany: Oh my Garrosh--Don’t say that out loud!

Org Daily Mail: Wait, did she? What’s that sly smile, Trixany?

Trixany: Okay, so I did sign on with Kimbul for a while during BFA--um, didn’t everyone?--and maybe Haris Pilton’s career did tank for a while. But was it a coincidence? You decide. Remember when she fell off the stage during that Consortium fashion show last spring? *shrugs* I don’t know if I believe in the loa stuff. As a Blood Elf, I guess it’s probably against my brand--

Mojo Jojo: Ya, I don’ tink you should claim dat.

Trixany: ...But at least now Haris does. She’s a devout believer in Kimbul. I hear she’s sworn never to go to Zuldazar, for fear of him.

Org Daily Mail: ...Ouch. But Trix, can you finish up the story for us? What happened to make you go to the Kaja-Cola Company and get the band back together?

Cocoa Crush: No, I should tell this part. Trixany wasn’t actually thea.

Trixany: *frowns, but tries not to say anything*

Org Daily Mail: What’s this? More sibling drama!

Cocoa Crush: I told the Kaja-Cola Company that people need thoughtless entertainment these days. Tha kinda fluffy, pathetic, ‘I’m dancing in a tube-top, look at me’ stuff that only my big step-sista Trixany could provide. And they agreed with me. Let’s not lie, I’m the brains hea. The fourth war was hard on everyone, and it was about the only way the company could get people to start drinking Kaja-Cola again.

Trixany: ...Yes.

Org Daily Mail: Trixany? Is that all you have to say?

Trixany: Legally, yes. That’s how it happened. Except for that tube-top jab my sis squeezed in there--

Coca Crush: After you drunk butt-dialed the Kaja-Cola Company for the last time, you betta be lucky I’m still even speakin’ to ya. I’m always cleaning up my step-sister’s drama. Ironic, too. They were getting ready to call Horde Records and have them drop her butt!

Shuga Slam: Ouch. Sounds like it’s always lok’tar ogar at the Cuomo house.

Trixany: Grr...

Cocoa Crush: But! I also saved my step-sista’s career. And now I’m officially the underwriter, so I’ll get the song credits I was supposed to be getting this whole time.

Cocoa Crush (Troll), Arcana Mama (Nightborne), Fiesta Lime Trixany (Blood Elf), Shuga Slam (Orc), Mega Meghan Mango (Tauren)

Black Cherry Dahlia: *smokey Forsaken voice* Nobody has asked about me yet. Or why I’m always getting cut off in all the publicity photos!

*girls screaming, then the male Orc interviewing starts yelling too*

Shuga Slam: Actually, why am I screaming? Me and my fangs get cut off on the other side of the photo if it’s not spooky Dahli getting cropped out.

Cocoa Crush: Eh, blame the KCC. They mix it up dependin’ on tha demographic they’re selling Kaja-Cola to.

Org Daily Mail: Blood and thunder! Black Cherry Dahlia? You’re a damned scary dame. I’m even impressed! How’d you even get into the studio? You weren’t here before? I could swear it--

Black Cherry Dahlia: I’m more than ready to spread Kaja-Cola products through Forsaken lands like the mighty Plague we all know and love.

Meghan Mega Mango: Do we... Does anyone love the Plague? Officially?

Mojo Jojo: You gotta take dat kinda stuff up with Bwonsamdi, dat not be in my contract, Undead-mon.

Shuga Slam: I’m not commenting, either. I’m Frostwolf Clan by birth, and I don’t need that kind of drama following me around on the Orc social media streams. If Eitrigg or Thrall unfriends me, I’m dead. Black Cherry, will you tone it down! It was bad enough when Sylvanas burned that tree. Don’t go burning our careers down! Again!

Org Daily Mail: One last thing. My producer is telling me now that you all have secret identities when you’re not out saving the world with your music. Care to go into detail?

Trixany: Other way around. We’re already strong fighters for the Horde. Saving lives, our lands, our people--that’s a daily thing. Our real names--I guess except for mine I suppose--those are the secret. But everyone knows our stage names.

Org Daily Mail: That doesn’t make any sense. Here ya go, while we try to figure this one out... We’re going to play some more Flava Girls footage in the background for the people streaming at home on their scrying orbs.

Trixany: Yes it does so make sense! It’s like... Jem and the Holograms but it’s flipped around. They were a band but nobody knew they were actually running around helping people, right?

Cocoa Crush: I told Trixany not to bingewatch that Jem show while she was drinkin’. *sigh*

Org Daily Mail: I’m pretty sure it’s the exact same thing, NOT flipped. You’re musicians, but you also have secret identities for when you’re fighting your enemies. This whole time, I never called any of you by your real names.

Trixany: Anyway, come see us perform. And if any of you fans out there recognize one of us in real life too, please don’t out us! We need to keep our true stage identities secret in order to play the happy, sassy music that we do.

Org Daily Mail: I’m still confused.

Arcana Mama: Yes, I think Trixany just really wants the ‘magical girl’ element as part of our aesthetic. It’s okay.

Trixany: There are wants and needs, Arcana. ‘Magical girl’ is a need for me.

Org Daily Mail: Alright! Well, thanks for coming into the studio, ladies. We look forward to seeing your heavily synchronized dances and auto-tuned voices wherever the Horde needs joy. Can you sing a little something for us before you go? Or, does that need to go through rehearsals and a pre-recorded lip-synching session first?

Black Cherry Dahlia: We’d better do it. This grimy Orc has been insulting us the entire time, ladies. I think he needs correcting. *cracks knuckles, neck super loudly*

Flava girls: *Trixany counts out a beat first, then they all hold hands and harmonize* Nobody loves Azeroth better I'mma stick with Malfurion forever Nobody gonna take Azzy higher That's why you're my Shan'dooo Only Malfy appreciates her Forget Tyrande--my archdruid baby! Nobody ever healed Azeroth this way No Shan'don't. He's my Shan'dooo!**

Org Daily Mail: LOKTAR!! Wow, that’s... all kinds of meta and complicated, yet LIT! It’s even cross-faction. I love it!! Tyrande won’t--but hey! Let’s hear it for the Kaja-Cola Flava Girls, everybody!

*The girls stand, still holding hands, and they curtsey beautifully. Then tall Meghan suddenly picks up a squealing Trixany. The other girls cheer and shake Kaja-Cola bottles. They spray a rainbow of tropical soda on everything*

All the Flava Girls: Arcana Mama (Nightborne), Mojo Jojo (Troll), Cocoa Crush (Goblin), Fiesta Lime Trixany (Blood Elf), Mega Meghan Mango (Tauren), Shuga Slam (Orc), Black Cherry Dahlia (Forsaken)

((**Parody song is Shan’dooo by Trixany @trixcuomo​))

[nxrthborn]

Peter's Positivity Post: Time to tag some beautiful babes that make my heart nut

@jerevinans : Because this bean always sends me asks that I reblog and makes me feel wanted and loved and it’s just so awesome to have this awesome mun around <3 you fr make me happy and I am super glad our muses have a thing and that we are mutuals you are so talented bby!

@chevalier-de-la-fleurs : my bean, my baby, my heart! This bean right here has stuck with me through a lot! Through all my Hiatus’, me having deleted my blog and then followed me again when I came back <3 that is honestly just... wtf I can’t even begin to explain how sweet and awesome that is <3 also for including me in things and just being so kind and gentle! I honestly would not trade you for anything because I cherish you and you are one of my best friends <3

@exilekniight : BO MY BEAN look Bo you are gr8 and I adore Jorah and Pytre and I just adore you as well. You make me laugh so hard cause you are funny as shit and such a sweet lil babe. Thank you for being a friend and I love hearing from you even if I’m lame and don’t really message people first but just know I think about you constantly and ilysm and I just ugh <3

@donahontes : My heart and soul right here, I love Sansa and I love you! Thanks for being such a pure soul and being so sweet to me seriously you make my hear BIG nut <3 I love the interactions we’ve had because Pytre and Sansa have become one of my otp’s and I just *chef kiss* MAGNIFICO. 

@jxime-lxnnister : yOU ARE SUCH A SWEET BBY AND I LOVE AND ADORE YOUR JAIME AND SO DOES PYTRE. You are such a good soul and I’m so happy we’ve gotten the chance to interact, Pytre loves Jaime and would protect him with his life <3 you’re such a talented writer and I just gotta say you are wonderful and thank you for being you <3

@lastxdragon : MY QUEEN MY LOVE MY BABY THIS SWEET AMAZING MUN RIGHT HERE IS JUST AHHHHH. You as well have been here for me through a lot! You were there through my Hiatus’ and you are still here now even after I deleted and came back that’s some real fuckin love right there! Pytre and I adore your Dany and we are so thankful that you are a part of our life and that you’ve made our tumblr experience one of a kind <3

@scndor : We have yet to truly interact with each other but look I appreciate you so heckin much, you’re just a pure and gentle being and I am so happy that you are here in my life at this very moment <3 you are always welcome to toss Sandor at my lil assassin boi and give us all the interactions! 

@alordnamedsnow : HOO YAAAS YOU you are just mmm *chefs kiss* BRILLIANT we have yet to truly interact but your Jon is one heckin awesome Jon and we are so excited to interact with you <3 I appreciate you and all the gentleness you offer to everyone in this community and it’s honestly just the sweetest thing ever plz never stop being you <3

@darysofsuvion : WOWZERS boooi do I love you, honestly one of the most kindest muns I know I literally can’t get over how wholesome and kind this lil bean is right here. Thank you for being you because Pytre and I love it! You’ve made my tumblr experience a lot better and I appreciate you every day <3

@blackasniight : a good bean a soft bean a truly sweet bean <3 you and I also have yet to interact but just know I am watching from afar and admiring how incredible and lovely you are <3 also your Jon? Wonderful! Magnificent! Lovely! You are so hecking great and you too make my heart big nut!

@hefzyisback : Such a well thought out OC and an lovely mun <3 honestly just go give this beautiful specimen a follow if you  don’t already! The mun is so kind and honestly listens to my sad lil rants (it was like once but still it made my heart big nut) seriously though I love this bean with all my heart amazing 11/10 would recommend.

@heldtoflames : My cancer twin! Is also one hell of a cool bean <3 can’t wait to see where our thread takes our tragic bois and I hope there are plenty more threads to come in the future! You are a sweet person and I’m glad we follow each other you too make my heart big big nut and I am so thankful for you <3 

@xdraecarys : Gosh I just mmm yes <3 a bean a soft bean (’: literally just the kindest soul ever and you should probs follow them if you don’t already we STAN OKAY?? Seriously though you are amazing and lovely and you defo shouldn’t let others get you down because you are one hell of an awesome person and your Dany??? *chefs kiss* MAGNIFICO

@thecomplication : PYTRE LOVES HIS MUM AND I LOVE YOU, seriously though you are one of my best friends on this site and I am so happy you are in this community! You bring so much love and happiness here that I just can’t help but stan you! Also you’ve come in clutch when I needed to know how long it would take to get to Bear Island from Essos and that was the nicest thing ever because it took a lot of math to figure out <3 11/10 would recommend 

@serbriennecftarth : You as well were someone who stuck by me through a ton of shit! Through all my Hiatus’ and me deleting then returning and you’re still here with me <3 You too are one of my closest and best friends on this blog and I truly would not trade you for anyone or anything <3 Your grasp of Brienne is so on point that I just want to say you are an amazing Brienne and an amazing writer <3 thank you for sticking with me through everything.

@killthebxy : Fil my man listen here pal you followed me through some shit as well and you’ve always been so nice to me. You stayed with me through my Hiatus’ as well and refollowed me when I came back <3  I consider you to be a best friend and I love you with all my heart. You’ve shown me nothing but kindness and I seriously thank you so much for that <3 Fil you make my heart nut with so much love

@zcldrizes : Artie! Artie listen bby you make my heart big nut okay?? You talked me through some tough shit a while back and for that I am honestly grateful. Seriously though you are so sweet and welcoming of others and it truly is amazing <3 I was so surprised when you followed me on my old Pytre blog when I first brought this boi to life and when I deleted and came back you again followed me <3 I too consider you as a best friend and I thank you for being one <3

@ascruelascunning : MY BEAN YOU MADE ME FEEL WELCOMED WHEN I FELT LIKE I WASN’T. Seriously though you are so nice and I love Pytre and Rams already our lil partners in crime <3 I thank you for being a friend and also interacting with me even though I am slow and have a pea sized goblin brain (’: thank you bby for being awesome and following me and just being so pure <3 

[ilikethemwings]

Kristen ( @branchlikeatree ) and Erin rewatch Legend, a really bad, 1985 fantasy movie with Tom Cruise

•the way he eats the cookie and looks up at her— he is a nasty boy (“I know someone sweeter” sir)

•why is he just...holding a fox? Like a live fox

• “Jack, now teach me rabbit like you promised” what???

• he sounds so prepubescent

• K: “he’s tryin to gag her!” Me: “It’s a blindfold you genius”

• “why does he live in the woods like where are your parents”

• K: “his ponytail is like a mid-evolution Pokémon between a rat tail and a full on ponytail”

• Me: “She has good teeth” K: “well yeah she’s a princess, she has dental”

• the pacing

• Me: “he’s a homeschooled boy that’s what he is”

• goblins, about unicorns: “look! Ugly one horned mules!”

• K: “The Unicorn is like ‘b*tch I’m not a sparrow, I’m a unicorn’”

• what’s with the excessive close-ups

• K: “are you sure that’s magic stirring?” Me: *points at unicorn* she’s... horny”

• K: “I’m not saying it’s her fault. But.”

• K: “Jack is she really worth it?” Me: “he doesn’t know any better, he’s homeschooled”

• Kristen: “God I hope those are goats”

• K: “what is he wearing under there Erin” Me: “he’s got spanx. It’s a leotard. It’s undies.”

• *goblins break into room* K: *to the tune of the Backstreet Boys* “everyboooodyyy” me: yeaaaahhh

• K: “how have they not found her?” Me: “they’re goblin do you think they have two brain cells?”

• the goblins just. Rhyme.

• K: “you better hurry. Tim Curry doesn’t wait.”

• “here be forest child, and don’t know the Gump?” K: “it’s the forest Gump”

• K: “me and Gump know what’s going on!”

• me: “did they just have a really low pants budget” K: “no they thought forest? Leaves?”

• *Gump pulls out a violin* K: “you’re my pretty little gumpway girl”

• me: “let’s get turnt with the forest spirits”

• K: “this is Narnia!”

• K: “do you think the unicorns are metaphors for Tom and Lily” me: “....maybe”

• there’s a lot that we have to assume, like, filling in the fact that Tom is currently communicating with a unicorn

• me: “I could see him playing Joseph” K: “oh don’t encourage him”

• me: “they give him armor but they don’t give him pants”

• he is just. COVERED in glitter.

• pig goblin: “why not turn everything into garbage?!” K: “is that actually me?”

• goblin: “shit!” Me: *gasps* he just said ‘shit’!

• goblin: “she’s just a female! She has no power!” Lord of Darkness: “she has the power of creation. Get the mare!” Me: “it isn’t a mare! I saw its horse penis.”

• K: “what in the name of Microsoft PowerPoint was that transition”

• K: “all they gotta do is go for his legs” me, imitating that Captain America vine: “because his shield is the size of a dinnerplate, and he’s an idiot”

• me: “is that me?” Meg, a monster from the swamp, looking at Tom/Jack: “you, come to Meg, juicy boy” K: “it is you!”

• K: “I feel like I’m watching a scene from the Hobbit” me: “yeah but like worse, it’s like the animated Hobbit” K: “it’s like a live action adaptation of the animated Hobbit”

• me: “oh he’s an Elf. But not like a hot Elf.” K: “more like the Keebler cookie Elf”

• Oona, the sprite: “I’ll do what you want if you kiss me” K: “why are you so obsessed with me?” Me: “because he has great hair”

• THE PACING

• “I’m just waiting for Tim Curry and the horrible v-neck dress”

• Lord of Darkness: “I will take her” his father, apparently: “no! You must WOO her!”

• they literally replaced 90% of people’s sweat with glitter

• me: “is she stupid?” K: “yeah she is” me: “she seems stupid” K: “I mean she got wooed by Jack eating a cookie” me: “I mean I did too but”

• K: “I tell you what I don’t like that creepy-ass baby”

• K: “I feel like I’m watching the opening scene of Black Swan”

• the VNECK is BELOW HER NAVEL

• K: “oh shit here come dat boi!”

• K: “his ears are placed where a cow’s would be” also K: “Damn you Tim Curry and your great voice” me: “his horns are...too phallic”

• K: “I feel like I’m watching the French version of Beauty and the Beast” me: “ew”

• K, repeating a line from earlier: “squawk squawk no more talk”

• K: “does Tom Cruise do his own stunts?” Me: “probably at this point. He was 23, he was probably pretty bendy”

• K: “this is like a poorly planned D&D campaign-“ me: “absolutely” K: “-like there’s a main goal but the DM hasn’t given a direct way to get to it”

• K: “....there’s just something....” me: “are you horny for Tim Curry” K, defensively: “there’s just something, appealing! About the way that he’s acting!”

• me: “this movie has made me...tired”

• Lord of Darkness: “in the beginning, there was nothing” K: “this must be one of those new translations”

• THE! PACING!

• me, every time they call the unicorn a girl/she/mare: “it’s a boy!”

• Lord of Darkness: “the birth of the new world awaits your stroke” me and K: “igghhhh”

• me: “he’s just boyish” K: “juicy boyish” me: “He has boyish charms” K: “juicy boyish charms”

• me: “the problem is that his teeth aren’t centered AND his nose is crooked” K: “and yet with the disproportions of his face he still looks good” me: “I do think he is not ugly”

• K: “wait did he just go back for it? I thought it was a flashback” me: “no they definitely used the same footage”

• Princess Lily is not relatable

• me, a little too smitten: “oh she gives him the ring, that’s cute!” K: “wait is she just gonna leave him there?” Me: “I think she’s breaking up with”

• Jack: “will you sing for me?” K, imitating that clip from the Office: “no! God! Please! No!”

•K: “so in conclusion, this was all Lily’s fault”

• Me, confirming both horses are male while K “aw”s: “yes, Kristen, they’re gay unicorns”

•we continue to confirm how bad this movie was, even though we knew this when we watched it freshman year

•closing thoughts:

-K: “I guess all I can say is... squawk squawk no more talk”

-me: “I just.... wish they had given him pants”

[eliamatrell]

jaga! your taste is frequently and consistently sublime! would you happen to have any media recommendations to share? could be literature, films, poems, tv shows, etc. 💞💗💕

oh mita, thank you! 💕this is such a lovely message to find in my inbox during this hellish heatwave. this list is quite incoherent - it’s so hard to find right words when your brain is melting and for that reason my english might be quite terrible at times - but! these are a few of my favourite things:

and then there were none, alias grace and the terror are great examples of acclaimed novels turned into equally good tv shows. imo the miniseries format is a superior option when it comes to adapting literature - there’s enough time to cover every important point, yet it doesn’t slog. also - there’s some terrific acting. 

i love horror, but only good horror - the kind that serves as a social commentary and doesn’t rely on gore, jumpscares and violence. there’s also my unfortunate catholic upbringing that makes me scared of anything with religious undertones (like the exorcist. or rosemary’s baby). despite being a bit of a snob who’s wary of mainstream writers, i adore stephen king’s works and his enormous impact on western cultural landscape. he shaped and influenced so many great creators and goodness - i can’t help but admire his imagination. i lovelovelove castle rock - it’s uncanny, connected to most of king’s novels and utterly engrossing. i’m hooked.

speaking of mister king - the shining (1980) is a masterpiece and it (2017) is one of my favourite movies ever. i was talking about this to my friend the other day, but i can’t bring myself to care about anything if it’s absolutely grim and hopeless. i need some light and hope, even if it’s just a spark. there is this great quote by sir terry pratchett (here’s the full essay): ‘The morality of fantasy and horror is, by and large, the strict morality of the fairy tale. The vampire is slain, the alien is blown out of the airlock, the evil Dark Lord is vanquished and, perhaps at some loss, the Good triumph – not because they are better armed, but because Providence is on their side. Let there be goblin hordes, let there be terrible environmental threats, let there be giant mutated slugs if you really must, but let there also be Hope. It may be a grim, thin hope, an Arthurian sword at sunset, but let us know that we do not live in vain.’ - that’s what i love about dark stories. there are always characters that are simply good, characters we can trust, characters that guide us and reveal all those monsters and terrible things, all while holding our hand and protecting us. stephen king, just like all great writers, is well aware of that, and it-the-movie (i hate this title! it’s so vague that i always have to specify what i’m talking about) is a great example of this trope.

i have this personal quest of watching every movie directed by alfred hitchcock. psycho (1960) was the first entry on my list and oh goodness. how i loved it. 

i love anglophone poets, but at the end of the day, i keep coming back to polish poetry. it’s sad. it’s mostly sad. we were conquered, invaded, wiped off the map, controlled by foreign empires, and it’s all reflected in our literature. still, there is this ever-present stubbornness - we’re still here. we’ll always be here. tadeusz różewicz was one of our greatest writers. his poems are about surviving and re-learning how to live after. they make me cry every single time. here are three of my favourite ones (i am twenty-four / led to slaughter / i survived). also, zbigniew herbert. report from the besieged city was written about poland (after the failed uprising of august 1944, hitler personally ordered that the entire city of warsaw be razed to the ground) but god. it’s very universal. now when i read it i tend to think of aleppo, of damascus, of mosul. warsaw rose from the ashes - i can only hope so will these cities.

and wisława szymborska, always wisława szymborska. photograph from september 11 is one of my favourite pieces written by her - the last lines are phenomenal. also - cassandra, lot’s wife, on death, without exaggeration.

speaking of ‘on death, without exaggeration’ - the good place is one of the best pieces of media about afterlife ever created. it’s bittersweet, so smart, and heartwarming. its portrayal of what’s beyond the veil is very familiar, very human. god, i love it. i can’t recommend it enough. also - moral philosophy has never been so cool.

c.s. lewis is mostly known for the narnia series, but his true magnum opus is ‘till we have faces’ - a retelling of the classical myth of eros and psyche. gosh, what a beautiful and melancholic book. it’s about possessive love, about bonds between the mortals and their gods, about families, about lovers, about the sacred and the profane. this goodreads review captures my feelings perfectly.

my fondness for joan baez is well-documented and baptism: a journey through our time is my favourite album of hers. it’s mostly works of various poets - spoken and sung by baez. i especially adore ‘the magic wood’ (written by henry treece). it’s so haunting! also, it reminds me of this one short story by stephen king (yes, i know!) - the man in the black suit.

recently i’ve finished reading the collection of fairytales composed by angela carter. it was very diverse and simply Great. i’m also taking ‘the bloody chamber’ on holiday with me. i’ve already started it and oh goodness. ooooh goodness. (“The girl burst out laughing; she knew she was nobody’s meat.” - i mean!!!)

when it comes to fairytales written by contemporary authors - emily carroll’s graphic novel ‘through the woods’ is one of the best examples of this genre. i’m not a fan of Edgy Fairytales, but these are definitely not edgy - they’re refined, bloody and gothic. also: ’It came from the woods. Most strange things do.’ is one of my favourite quotes.

in this household we stan and support everything inspired by eastern european folklore. please, do read uprooted. and also spinning silver. i might be a little bit biased, but still - it’s just very well-written and imaginative. 

‘east of the sun, west of the moon’ illustrated by p.j. lynch will always be my favourite version. here are some samples: one, two, three, four.

i’m not too fond of ya as a genre, but. but. the cruel prince was incredibly good - much better than its title (although there was a prince. and he was indeed cruel!) and description would suggest. it’s a perfect summer read and it features faerie, a lot of bickering, some slashed throats and also good ol’ schemes and court machinations.

i love musicals. a lot of them - the good, the bad, the mediocre. i just really like people singing, you know. however, ‘natasha, pierre & the great comet of 1812′ is… god, it’s a lot. it’s about love, about war, about depression and loneliness, about honour, about healing - but first and foremost about humanity. please, do watch this performance (and then listen to the whole cast recording). goodness, what a wonderful show.

to be quite honest, this is only a fraction of my recs, but i didn’t want for this post to be too overwhelming. once again - thank you so much for asking! 💝

[orangekingfisher]

okay no i need to talk about this otherwise the goblin in my brain won't shut the fuck up

let's take a look at fuori dall'hype. great album. amazing lyrics. cool

Antartide is the first character we meet. i'll say right away this is an aroace anthem. yeah you read that right.

he never describes her appearance, just her vibe/aura, the way she thinks, her emotions. a bit of her past and her present. the song starts like this:

"a undici anni, quand'eri piccola / aspettavi una lettera da hogwarts / per dimostrare a tutti i tuoi compagni che eri tu quella diversa da loro"

"at eleven, when you were young, you waited for a hogwarts letter to demonstrate to all your classmates that you were the different one"

translated badly but idc

we have already an understanding of someone who'd rather be weird and special than fit in. the letter, however, won't arrive and "the sweetest girl cried bitter tears". she's gotten older now but she still seems to wait for it, to have a confirmation that yes, she's actually different. she steals grapes when no one's looking, she draws rainbows, she is quirky. she wants to move out but she never does (is she scared? spoiled?) and you relate with her because you're lame and listening to indie music. moving on

in the chorus we find out that she doesn't like meeting new people and that's why she's called Antartide:

"provano a rompere il ghiaccio con te / ahi ahi ahi / non sanno che tu sei l'antartide"

"they try to break ice with you, they don't know you're antartica"

she's probably someone who needs her own time to meet people, or she needs to be the one going forward.

and then we have THIS:

"quando le amiche parlavano di sesso / ergevi muri e ti mancava l'aria, ehi / qualcuna di loro poi rimase incinta e invece tu / sempre in cinta muraria"

"when friends talked about sex, you built walls and ran out of air; some of them then became pregnant and you, on the other hand, always behind walls"

Antartide is ace and sex repulsed. this is part of her, this is who she is, and yet it's not demonised or talked about like it's wrong. it's just... her. and she's more than that too: she's nerdy ("JD's heart and Kelso's mind"), she listens to Gigi D'Agostino and Strawinsky, she likes the rain.

now described like this it's a bit shit, but in 4mins Zanotti gave me a better description of someone than in most songs (and even some books really)

not convinced? fair. next up it's Lake Washington Boulevard, which describes the two protagonists in four lyrics:

"lui era figlio dei ritardi del treno / che fecero conoscer mamma e papà / lei era bella come il cielo più nero / cercava il senso della vita nei bar"

"he was the son of the train delays, that let mom and dad meet; she was as beautiful as the darkest night, she looked for the meaning of life in bars"

andddd that's it. you really don't need any more words. isn't that incredible?

okay now let's play a game. here are some lyrics from Nonono (just so you know the lyrics are divided between "dreaming description" and "awake description". make of that what you will). try and guess what's the relationship between the singer and this new character:

(dreaming)

"leggevi piccoli brividi / e bevevi un caffè con me [...] ci siamo messi a ridere / della paura di morire, della voglia di partire, della gioia di vivere / e ti leggevo la mano / e la imparavo a memoria / e se ho fortuna ti giuro che un giorno ti porto nei libri di storia"

"you read spooky stories / and drank a coffee with me [...] we laughed / at the fear of dying, at the desire to leave, at the joy of living / and I read your hand / and I learned it by heart / and if I'm lucky I swear to you that one day I'll take you into the history books"

okay. it's kinda clear they're close, right?

(chorus)

"spettinata e resti qua / perché la più grande libertà / è quella che ti tiene in catene / e i pugni in faccia che mi dai / li conservo nell'anima / accanto a tutti i "ti voglio bene""

"[you are] unkempt and you stay here / because the greatest freedom / is the one that keeps you in chains / and the punches in the face that you give me / I keep them in my soul / next to all the "I love you"s*"

*it's actually a platonic way of saying ily

uh-oh. so they're not dating, huh?

(awake)

"quando il telefono non ha squillato / io l'ho capito che eri te / hai detto: "impara a vivevere da solo!" / ma solo ci sapevo stare / la mia solitudine era un mondo magico che io ti volevo mostrare / che bello quando balli con quegli occhi gelidi / mi piaci se ti muovi come fanno i lemuri / sono l'ultimo dei tuoi pensieri e tu mi eviti / ma gli ultimi saranno i primi come Steven Bradbury / tu sei la sfida finale di Takeshi's Castle / io ci provo a capirti e non capisco un cazzo / guarda che notte / c'è la luna piena / e dici: "ti amo solo perché mi fai pena""

"I knew it was you when the phone didn't ring / you said, "Learn to live alone!" / but I knew how to stay alone / my loneliness was a magical world that I wanted to show you / you're so beautiful when you dance with those cold eyes / I like when you move it move it / I am the last one of your thoughts and you avoid me / but the last will be the first like Steven Bradbury / you are the final challenge of Takeshi's Castle / I try to understand you and I don't understand shit / look at the night / there is a full moon / and you say "I love you* only because I pity you""

*actual romantic ily

first of all great lyrics second of all YIKES

soooo. did you get it? look at the chorus again. think about it for a second.......

yep, they're friends with benefits. how cool huh? he never said that, yet it's clear. and it's a song, may i remind you! not a piece of literature. 4mins and the chorus is repeated too.

i could talk about them more, believe me. but this is just a little bit of what he can do. and i haven't even talked about the stories he tells in their songs!!! ah!!!!!

please listen to pinguini tattici nucleari. thank u

if i had a fraction of the skill that zanotti has for describing people all my problems would be solved methinks

[wizardsnwookies]

DFD022218 - Stories by the Fire

Raven quietly bussed the empty dishes in front of one of her regulars, Talmuld the carpenter and was thanked with the traditional nod. The inn was filled with the usual suspects tonight, with no indication it would be unlike any other. She brushed a lock of her ebony hair out of her faced and contemplated again cutting it short. Back in her adventuring days she would keep it no longer than below her ears, chopping it hap haphazardly with her dirk if it got too long. These days there weren’t much cause for worry regarding a goblin grabbing hold of her locks and pulling her head back to slit her throat, it helped keep her neck warm, but damned if it wasn’t a nuisance.

The banging of the door as it slammed back against the wall broke into her thoughts, the cold wind blew in from the night and flakes of snow wafted in onto the floor. Heavy boots tracked it in even further. She’d have to mop that up. She looked at the clock that never kept that well a time, but it was enough to estimate. Everyone who was going to show was either here or came and went. Travelers. Her spirit lifted at the thought of full coin purses and she turned to greet them warmly, her smile was immediately wiped clean off her face when she saw who was among the newcomers.

“What is this a temple? This is a place of revelry and warmth!!” Baldric twirled off his coat and handed it to the nearest table to hang up for him, kicking the snow from his heels and already identifying the easy pickings in the crowd. “Come, pull up your chairs and I will tell you of our treacherous journey to your lovely town!”

Surtur rolled his eyes and relieved a confused young woman of Baldric’s coat, tossing it outside into the snow. “Long story short, he was hit by a kobold’s sling and cried!”

Baldric ignored the shot and sat on top of one of the tables, leaning in towards the crowd that had quickly become drawn to his energy. “Why, it’s so cold out there you’d freeze your beard off!”

“NO, not my beard!” A drunkard gasped.

“YES! Why look at me. When we began this journey I had a magnificent beard, but now...” Baldric rubbed his bare chin for effect. “Smooth as a baby’s arse!!” Baldric bellowed with laughter, slapping his knee. Laughter tended to be infections, even if it was disingenuous. Sure enough, the sleepy crowd followed in turn, perking up from their tankards.

Surtur and Siggrun hung their furs up on the rack and founds seats at the bar, trying their best to ignore the commotion beginning to grow around them. Raven moved towards them with baleful eyes cast in the bard’s direction.

“Food and drink, if you please.” Surtur set down his flail in the chair next to him as if it were his precious son.

“Of course.” Raven coldly poured two pints and shoved them towards the pair of dwarves. Her sour mood only to get worse.

“-for days now, with nothing but the packs on our back. Our feet have become bloodied and blistered, our bellies filled with nought but dried beef well past it’s due, our whetskins so dry we wring from them nought but the oil used to tan them...” Baldric was laying it on thick now, but damned him if it didn’t work.

“Raven! Get this man food and drink by Gods! On me!”

“Why sir, I am astounded and humbled by your generosity. If I may repay you for such kindness,” Baldric removed the look from behind him and shot a wink in Raven’s direction.

“Ugh...what are you doing traveling with him?” She scribbled the order down on a scrap of paper and slammed it down on the window behind her leading into the kitchen.

“Hoping to make a man out of him.” Surtur wiped the ale from his whiskers. Curious, it tasted somewhat sweeter than common ale, more like mead than anything else really.

“Good luck with that. Some free advice? That one’s bad news.”

“Aye, we’re well aware lassie.” Siggrun folded his arms on the counter and pulled a face. “Unfortunately we’re stuck with ‘em for the time being. Eh, but mebbe we get lucky and the mountain will put him out of our misery.”

“Not Death Frost?” She slid two bowls of steaming yak stew in front of them, the color drained from her rosy cheeks.

“Aye, that be the one.”

“Let me guess, Lord Umber?”

Siggrun and Surtur exchanged looks.

“You’re not the first he’s sent up that mountain, not the first dwarf either. About five years back, name of Winston. I tried to warn him that the pass was haunted but he wouldn’t hear anything of it. No one’s seen him since.” Raven felt a chill run up her spine. In her days of blood and glory she never stood down from anything that lay in front of her, but even thinking of that mountain...

“Hey, you pansy ass bastard, get over here, we’re talking business!” Surtur leaned over his shoulder and made sure to shout loud enough for the whole inn to hear. The look Baldric shot him could curdle goat’s milk.

“Please, do excuse me. I’m afraid I’m the brains of this operation, can’t do a thing without me.” Another boisterous laugh left his lips but was cut short the instant he was out of earshot. “What the HELL are you doing?? I was working that crowd!”

“And they weep for their loss I’m sure.” Siggrun shoved him into the counter, knocking the wind out of his chest before continuing. “Funny you should mention Winston, I ‘ad a friend of mine head up this way looking for ‘im. Human by the name of Norquist, ring any bells?”

Raven shook her head. “No, and we don’t get many visitors around here.”

Siggrun frowned and took a solemn pull from his tankard, such news didn’t bode well. “Well, you were saying something about a pass?”

“Yeah, leads you straight up the mountain.” Raven cast her eyes over to the wall, as if looking through it and out into the snow, towards the dark shadow that loomed over the entire town. “Word is it’s cursed, so it’s still not something I’d recommend doing, but considering the alternative.”

“The alternative being?” Baldric slouched over, he was already bored.

“Scaling the mountain yourself, which is a death sentence. But in your case, be my guest.” She stared daggers at him. This one had been a thorn in her side before. Strolling into town with nothing to his name, coming into her inn, fleecing her customers, and walking out with everything he could carry.

The bard smiled, a thought slithering its way through his lizard brain. He wondered, did she hate him enough to not be worth the attempt? The payoff, on the other hand, was quite tempting. What the hell, let’s give it a go.

“I’d listen to her my friends, she may look like just another beautiful young maiden behind a bar. Don’t let that fool you. Why, in her day she was a thing of legends. I have sung songs of her achievements that have left the crowd in nothing short of awe.”

Wow. Did he actually think that would work on her, Raven thought? Did he think her simple? The bastard. She looked at the other two for some kind of sympathy or shared disgust in this little wart. These two dwarfs seemed decent enough men. Sturdy. Brave... I wonder?

Raven looked around her at the inn that sometimes seemed like it was falling down around her. Talmuld was a miracle worker with a hammer, but even he could only repair something so far before it needed fresh wood. Up here, that tended to get expensive in the quantities she would need it. New stairs, roof patching, doors, stools, table tops...we’re talking a lot of gold. The kind of gold an adventurer would pull in...

“Alright, you want me to go with you? Fine.”

Baldric smiled, got her!

“On one condition,” she jabbed a finger into his chest and dug in. “You pay these people back everything by paying their way tonight.”

Surtur chuckled, he liked this one! Meanwhile, Siggrun was busy admiring the well toned muscles hidden by her simple tunic. The way they bulged out of the fabric when she poked the bard in the chest told him she was no stranger to wielding a sword. There would be no objections from him.

“Fine.” Baldric surprised them all, gently taking her finger and moving it away form his chest he turned and bellowed into the crowd, arms raised high above his head. “Everyone!! Next round is on me!!!”

A deafening cheer rang out into the inn, tankards were raised in a toast to this delightful young man. Sour old men that Raven had yet to see smile at all this evening walked up and slapped him on the shoulder, eager to receive their next drink. Raven squinted her eyes, this, she was not expecting. Baldric spun back around and returned her confusion with a smile that was dripping with self satisfaction and pulled a small shift of paper from inside his tunic and handing it to the barmaid.

“You’ll want to pack your heavy coat. It’s bound to get cold up there.”

Raven examined the piece of paper and she cursed to herself. It was a expense slip, all to be charged in  the name of Lord Umber.

---

“Hey...whazzin this pie?” Surtur’s speech slurred as he struggled to maintain balance on the stool, eventually he gave up and leaned against the bar top. He gestured with his fork to the half eaten slab of warm fruit pie in front of him. It was all the Inn served, and he had had more than his share of it.

“Frostberries.” Raven smiled, taking the opportunity to slide his tankard away, hiding it under the counter. “It’s about the only thing that grows up here, so we use it for everything we can. Even the ale.”

“I thought it tassssssted sweet.”

“Come on now lad, I think you’ve had enough.” An armored arm wrapped itself around Surtur’s shoulder and pulled him to the ground, making sure he stood nice and sturdy on his own two feet. Siggrun tossed a purse of coins behind him to Raven. “I’ll see him to bed. Now get yourself some sleep, we’re off early in the mornin’.”

The two dwarves slowly made their way upstairs, stopping every few steps to make sure Surtur didn’t fall or worse, wretch all over the priest holding him up. In the corner of the inn, Baldric smiled and watched them dissappear at the top of the stairs and waited until he heard two doors close solidly. Separate rooms, thank the Gods.

They had been traveling together for some time now, and aside from the night at Lord Umber’s manor they had been sharing a tent the entire time. Two dwarves and a human, three sets of armor, Surtur’s ungodly large flail, and their packs, all crammed into a humid tent bathing in the scent of three individuals who were covered in callouses, scars, and had not bathed in days. Baldric was aching for a soft bed, and more pleasant company.

Looking around he was dismayed to find he was the last one awake, all of Wolfshead’s residents were warm in their beds now as far as he can tell...that is, all except himself and Raven, whom he suspected would awaken him with a knife in the back considering her past attitudes.

Although...perhaps not. He had managed to get her to come along hadn’t he? Besides, imagining a warm soft body smelling of ale and flowers was far too tempting. He could at the very least give it the old college try. Who knows, he might get lucky.

“So, Raven.” He poured every ounce of charm he had on reserve into his voice. The look he gave her was not promising towards his odds of success. “Seeing as we’re going to be spending a lot more time together, I was just wondering...

“Well, it’s awfully cold out there tonight, and you know what they say about body heat being the best way to keep warm.” He slipped his hand across the counter and rested it gently on hers. For a moment he braced himself, expecting a knife to come crashing down, sacrificing her own hand just to spite him.

“You know what Baldric, I think you’re right.” Raven cooed sweetly.

“I am?”

“Absolutely.” She leaned forward before pulling away, showing off her assets as she made her way into the kitchen. “Just let me get a few things.”

Wow, thought Baldric. I honestly didn’t think that would work. He smiled to himself noting to never again doubt his abilities. His self congratulatory mood was broken however by the emergence of a massive orc pulling off a stained chef’s apron.

“I hear you like body warmth.” Baldric’s eyes watered at the foul breath that leaked from a mouth of half rotten teeth. The orc’s hygiene habits made the dwaves seem like primed and proper. His massive chest was as if chiseled from stone and covered in a forest of hair. Scars littered his skin, the areas that weren’t covered in warts and sores that is. From beneath his arms an acrid stench combined with the breath and made the bard light headed. That cramped tent, suddenly seemed far more appealing.

Behind the orc Raven leaned against the jamb of the door leading into the kitchen, a triumphant smile plastered on her face. Touche, Raven, Baldric though. Well played indeed, but I’ll be damned if I let you think you’ve won. Otherwise, the journey up that mountain would be doubly insufferable.

Baldric straightened an composed himself, holding his chin high he turned and headed for the stairs. “Well, looks like I’m the little spoon then.”

---

Gor, prayed Siggrun, give me strength so that I may continue the work of the Bloodyhand. Your servants fought this evil once before, if it not be finished, I will bring their work to a close in your glorious name.

Ice cold winds pelted his skin, melting for the briefest of moments before freezing in his beard. He could feel the cold pressure of the snow through his furs as they trudged through the drifts of the covered pass. This was only the beginning, they had a long ways yet to go. He had strength enough for now, but he knew only Gor would ultimately decide his fate. He only wished that his god was kind enough to let him die a beautiful death, with a weapon in his hand, and blood upon his face. A warriors death, as all deaths should be.

On their second day of hiking, the town below appeared as it could be held in his palm, but still the mountain loomed ahead of them. He looked back at the Bard, struggling to keep up as was expected. Raven took the rear, bless her. She knew Baldric’s pride would not allow him to be the last in line. As long as she kept pace behind him, Baldric would keep moving and they would keep to their time.

“Hold up, we’ve got something up ahead.” Surtur held up a fist allowing Siggrun to catch up and peer through the flurries. Dusk was falling, so he was forced to squint to catch the rest but a warm campfire was easily spotted just outside a cluster of trees.

“What is it? We making camp?” Raven shoved the lagging Bard forward, not a bead of sweat on her brow.

“Someone is. A tanner maybe, or a fur trapper from the looks of it.” Siggrun motioned to the camp before them. They could smell it from here, the fresh gore of hide hanging from the trees. Wolf pelt, fox, even a bear. Bones and antlers littered the red puddles of melted snow, and the naked corpses of animals heaped to one side gathering snow.

“Old Zeke.” Raven wrinkled her nose as the stench, her voice lowering to just above a whisper. “Best be careful from her on out. He’s a bit...off, but long as we don’t upset him we should be fine.”

The group pressed forward slowly, more details coming into view and the foul odor coming more and more pervasive. On each hanging skin, were names, scrawled with a trembling hand and written in blood. These names it seemed, were being copied onto wooden plaques, delicately carved. Each one resting in various stages of completion below their corresponding skin. Just as they were about to hail the resident within the crude shack, a massive figure pushed back the heavy skins and stepped out into the snow.

The man was massive, standing nearly two heads taller than Baldric. The cold eyes that stared back at his visitors showed his years, years that had not at all been kind or easy. Blood covered him head to toe, dried flecks of red stained his long grey beard. For a moment there was only the dull clatter of the wooden bowl and spoon tucked under his arm as he examined the group before a weary grin curled from his lips.

“Well now, been a long time since I’ve had visitors up these parts. Raven, keeping them lads at bay down at the inn?”

“Best I can.” Raven forced a slight smile, but her stance was tense Siggrun noticed, ready for anything. A warrior’s stance. He was liking this woman more and more. “How you keeping up here?”

“Oh, I manage.” An old chuckle fell out of him and Zeke groaned as he lowered himself down onto a hunk of tree pulled up to the fire. Wrinkled hands, seemingly not bothered by the frigid temperatures reached out and stirred a bubbling pot of stew within a small camp cauldron. “Supper just about came on, you’re welcome to it if you like. Warm you up ‘fore your way back.”

“‘Way back?’“ The bard shifted in his place and sucked his teeth. Siggrun noticed it as a nervous tell, he was uncomfortable. For once, the warpriest couldn’t blame him.

“Afraid I can’t let you got much further than here.”

“Why not?” Surtur shot a careful look Siggrun’s way, a part of the unspoken communication they had perfected through their journeys. A careful look in his direction betrayed a slight tightening of his grip upon the flail heaved over his shoulder.

“It’s cursed land.” Stew slopped and steamed into Zeke’s bowl. Not once did he look up from it. His voice steady, very matter of fact.

“I ain’t afraid. I’ll punish whatever’s up there.” Siggrun finally spoke up, pulling aside his furs to flash the sigil of Gor emblazoned upon his armor. Only then did Zeke’s eyes lift from his dinner, they paused briefly on the sigil, then stared into Siggrun’s eyes with a burning intensity that sent a shock through his system.

“If you ain’t afraid, you ought to be. I’ll say it again, I ain’t letting you up that mountain.

“Ask Raven, she’ll tell you what the people in Wolfshead think of me. Think me simple, maybe even mad. Now don’t go fibbing little lady, I know it’s true.” Zeke held up a hand to stop Raven’s feeble attempts at protesting. He closed his eyes, setting his bowl into the snow and leaned forward on his knees.

“Fact is, I know more of the truth than most down there do about this mountain. Those that do, they’re content to keep quiet of the fact, try and forget. That’s fine, I understand. Some things are just too much for folk to bare. Sometimes the only way to keep on is to forget. Some days I wish I could, but the fact is, someone has to remember, for them.” Zeke motioned to the names carved on the plagues, painted in blood on hanging skins above them.

“I seen them graves the cult dug for them. Little more than holes in the ground really. Tossed them aside like rotten vegetables from the cellar. So many bodies, can’t hope to remember them all. They kept good records though, if’n I hadn’t lost my nerve I’d have made a copy of them while I was up there.”

Surtur sat down across the old man warming himself by the fire and grabbing his own bowl from his pack. “Maybe you can tell us where to find it. We could bring it back-”

“Ain’t you been listening?” Zeke snapped, almost moving to a stand. Siggrun felt his muscles tense instinctively, beside him he watched Raven’s hand reach for the hilt of her sword, Baldric was conveniently absent. Surtur put a hand up, shaking his head, the signal to hold.

“I told you, that place is cursed. You don’t bring nothing down from off that mountain or you’ll bring it with you, and you ain’t going up there anyhow. What you want up there anyways?” The old man’s eyes narrowed, staring through each and every one of them.

“Gold, obviously. What other reason is there?” Finally showing himself, Baldric was immediately met with Raven’s elbow in his gut. But it was too late, Zeke had heard him and replied with by spitting on the ground.

“What good is gold if you’re dead?”

“I’m looking for someone who went missing not a few days ago.” Siggrun stepped forward and returned Zeke’s stare unflinchingly. “He went looking for a mutual friend who was sent up that mountain on a quest and never came back.”

For a moment, Zeke’s eyes softened, his muscles relaxed some, and he almost appeared to sink back into the stump, deflating as he let out a long sigh. “He like family?”

“Aye.”

Everything was quiet, the only sound the crackling of the fire and soft flutter of snow falling from weighted branches. “It’s getting dark. Eat up, you can share my shack for the night if you wish.” He offered nothing else and ignoring his half-eaten dinner in the snow beside him, Zeke stood and retreated to his tent.

The group looked at each other, neither of them sure of what had happened, or what to expect from the morning. Eventually, cold and hunger forced them to comply and fill their bellies with a hunters stew of water, blood, and tough hunks of meat. Upon entering the shack they found the old man already asleep in a pile of furs in the corner, and when they awakened the next morning, he was gone.

[munchix-home-cooking]

RP Log: Munchix and Rayena go hiking

@rayenaray :D

Munchix Bogbelly - After a day's worth of rest, Munchix is ready to tackle ‘the big hike.’ In preparation, he’s already asked around about how best to hike up to Yanxia’s hidden tree, to which he was mostly met with looks of confusion. But a few have vaguely directed him eastward, and so, that’s where he’ll go!

Munchix Bogbelly waves to Rayena. “Ready to head out?”

Rayena Corsano raised a brow. "Yes, but, are we sure this tree is even here? A lot of people you asked seemed confused, where did you even hear about this thing?"

Munchix Bogbelly pats Rayena on the shoulder in an attempt to dispel any anxieties she rightfully had about his tree hunt. “Rumors of rumors of rumors, heard first in drinkinghouses in Kugane. But do not fret! I’m sure there’s some inkling of truth in all this.”

Rayena Corsano made a small smirk. "Alright, well, I am ready and have food packed if we get hungry once we're at the tree." she nodded with a beaming smile.

Munchix Bogbelly: “Ah, a tastymost idea! I’ve also packed a few snacks for the road, so hunger should not be a problem.” He momentarily places his backpack on the ground and opens it, revealing an array of neatly packaged bento boxes and wrapped foods. Basically a buffet worth of food. Munchix smiles back as he hefts the cargo back up, and begins marching towards the mountains in the east.

Rayena Corsano beamed at all the bento boxes before making a nod and following him close behind, watching for anything to sneak up on them again.

Munchix Bogbelly confidently walks at a steady pace, absolutely masking the fact that he’s pretty much just wandering up the hill without a clue in the world of where he’s going. But the weather’s nice, and the two find themselves higher up, with a view of the landscape below. Munchix whistles as he looks down. “Hope you’re not scared of heights.”

Rayena Corsano looks around as she easily climbs the hill before pausing to look down below. "No, not really. I am just hoping we don't run into anything and we're on the right path."

Munchix Bogbelly: “At this height, I figure the worst we can run into are birds. Hm, and maybe unidentified flying objects?” He takes a moment to pause, and then continues, banishing the thought from his head. “Anyway, being up here reminds me of home.”

Rayena Corsano smiled warmly. "I can easily toss my chakrams at any birds that come for us. So, where is home for you? Home for me would be Limsa." she nodded.

Munchix Bogbelly conjures up an image of Rayena, tossing deadly chakrams at the local fauna. It’s both comforting and amusing. “Ah, good ole’ Limsa! That’s my home /away/ from home. Have you been to the Bismarck?” He pulls himself up higher, grabbing an exposed tree root to steady his climb. “But ah, yeah. I’m from Dravania. It’s not the easiest place to visit on a whim.”

Rayena Corsano grinned and nodded. "Of course, many, many times, even in my childhood. My favourite thing there was the lobster rolls. Delicious." she beamed. "I don't think I've been to Dravania, I don't venture in that area very often..."

Munchix Bogbelly: “Ooh, yes! The lobster rolls are delicious, muchly. Maybe I cooked you something? I trained there for awhile. Still training, even.” He looks around to find his bearings, then continues hiking. “It’s not exactly what uplanders call, a civilized place. Used to, but not in recent times. Nowadays, it’s mostly inhabited by rough adventurers, goblins, and leftover Sharlayan machina. Which is fun for some?” A curious glance is given to Rayena. Maybe she was the scholarly type?

Rayena Corsano beamed, clasping her hands together. "You'll make me lobster rolls? Well, I won't turn that down." she nodded. "I mostly stick to the cities nowadays, I don't venture much further. What sort of things do you do there?" she smiled.

Munchix Bogbelly is just. Given life at Rayena’s reaction. Cooking for others really was core to what brought Munchix joy. “Duly noted! When we’re in an area with lobsters to roll!” He thinks a bit about Dravania, that wild area that not many passed through, even in its heyday.

Munchix Bogbelly: “My gobfamily would mostly pass from area to area, scavenging any old bobblebits and ekking a living off the land. Wasn’t until I left for Limsa that seeing non-goblins became the norm, rather than the exception. Everyone is...so tall!”

Rayena Corsano smirked. "Well, everyone is tall except for us, female au ra, lalafell and possibly female midlanders, I got used to it rather quickly." she nodded.

Munchix Bogbelly: “You’re a decent height. Though yeah, the first time I saw a lalafell I nearly blew a gasket. Thought I was hallucinating, even!” He laughs at the memory. “In Limsa though...truly, it’s like walking among giantfolk. Roegadyn are simply too tall!”

Rayena Corsano nodded and smirked. "Yes, a lot of Roe there, especially the sea wolves and more so if you're with the Maelstrom or the yellow jackets, have to crane your neck so back just to look at 'em in the face." she giggled.

Munchix Bogbelly bends down to examine the ground. A couple of delicate pink flower petals float on the surface of a puddle. Hm, a sign that they were walking in the right direction? Only time would tell. He gets back up and continues. “Sometimes I just give up. Stare directly in their chest while we talk, neck hurts too much looking up.”

Rayena Corsano smiled. "I always try and look at everyone in the eyes or make it seem like I am by looking at their nose or lips." she then looked towards the ground as he bent down, making a soft audible gasp. "Is that a pink flower petal? I-is this really real after all?" she looked a little surprised.

Munchix Bogbelly groans, like a kitten thoroughly chastised. “I know, I know. But I’ve spent the better half of my life looking down, that I think my head just isn’t used to looking up anymore! All excuses on my part...” He looks onwards, searching for a trail of petals to follow. “Aha, yes, Rayena! And we’re hot on the tree’s trail. Shouldn’t be far now.”

Rayena Corsano smiled. "Well, you can always practice and if your neck gets sore just give an excuse that you need to leave." she beamed, than clasped her hands together. "Oh, I am starting to feel excited! I can't wait to see it." she said, then grinned.

Munchix Bogbelly: “Practice? Like this?” Munchix begins to look up and down, still walking all the same. It’s not exactly conducive to maintaining one’s balance, and a second later he trips on a stray stone. He totters frightfully close to the edge of the cliff.

Rayena Corsano gasped. "Munchix!" she said, moving quickly after him to pull him away from the edge of the cliff. "I don't mean while you're walking, more if you're standing still or sitting." she giggled softly.

Munchix Bogbelly is, thankfully, reined back in by Rayena. He would nod, but his neck is tired from all that practice. “Ach, got it. I might’ve sprained something there...” Munchix massages his shoulder, and then gives it a few good twists. Probably still fine!

Rayena Corsano looked at him with a concerned look. "Should we head back? I could make you a warm compress for your neck, ease the tension." she nodded, giving him a warm smile. "Or..." she said, placing a hand on the back of his neck, he'd feel a soothing warm sensation as she used healing magic on his neck.

Random! Rayena Corsano rolls a 316.

Munchix Bogbelly - The healing magic was somewhat effective, but given that it was meant to treat a shoulder sprain and not a life threatening injury, even somewhat goes the distance. Perhaps it’s the altitude interfering with the magic? Either way, Munchix gives a nod of thanks to Rayena, and feels a little more energized. “Oh, you didn’t have to! But thanks, muchly.”

Rayena Corsano frowned. "Hmm, which it had done more." she said, clenching her hands then spreading her fingers. "I suppose the warm compress will help then. Are you well to move forward?" she asked, smiling softly.

Munchix Bogbelly ‘s tail quivers, then fluffs up. He looks to the right. “I get the feeling we’re very close to our destination, so I’ll be fine to hike up this last part. Though I’ll certainly take that compress when we get there!” He gives her a thumbs up, and then follows the path the petals have laid out for them.

Munchix Bogbelly - After spending several bells climbing, the mountain finally caves in, revealing freshwater and islands of blossoming trees. Munchix nearly faints from excitement.

Rayena Corsano follows close behind, huffing before sitting down once they stop. "Wow, this is real. It's beautiful." she smiled warmly.

Munchix Bogbelly finally recovers from the initial shock, and wobbles down the slope. It’s more than he expected (and in some ways, he expected nothing, so this is infinitely more!). “This is...it’s wonderful! Gobsmacking picturesque!” At the lake’s edge, he cups some of the water and splashes it onto his face, cool droplets refreshing after so much climbing.

Rayena Corsano remains seated as he cools off with the water, slowing her breathing down to a better stance. "Well, this is really nice, you can probably swim and drink the water here." she smiled warmly.

Munchix Bogbelly: “Oh, I’ve heard all manner of stories about mysterious watering holes, of brain eating leeches and vile critters.” He dips his feet into the water and lets out an audible sigh. “....I don’t know why I brought that up. T-this water is probably safe! Scare myself, eh?!”

Rayena Corsano frowned. "Sounds like a story of why my ex was scared of drinking water but, pretty sure this is fine." she smiled warmly. "We can probably just relax here for a few bells."

Munchix Bogbelly dries himself off and takes a seat by Rayena. The air here was certainly crisp. There was something cooly serene about the place - the sound of water, of wind, and the silence in between. He smiles. “Relaxing sounds good.”

Rayena Corsano smiled warmly at him before pulling out a couple sandwiches from her bags and a bottle each of lemonade, handing him a sandwich and a bottle of lemonade. "Well, I say we deserve something to eat after that hike." she grinned.

Munchix Bogbelly takes the food offering in hand. “Ooh, how homey! What’s in it?” He raises the sandwich in particular.

Rayena Corsano beamed. "Slice dodo, some peppers, lettuce, and mayo. The lemonade was also made at home." she nodded.

Munchix Bogbelly: “There’s something about home cooking that’s hard to replicate in fine dining. I think it’s all the love that goes in it.” He scarfs the sandwich down and leans back, satisfied. “I brought some things too! Dried persimmon slices from Namai, and bento boxes...That’s if you’re still hungry. I have at least ten lunches packed, hah!”

Rayena Corsano grinned. "I mean, I can usually always eat." she said, taking a bite of her sandwich. "What's in the bento boxes?" she smiled.

Munchix Bogbelly pulls out one that’s wrapped in a red patterned cloth, and opens it. Inside are two half sausages (fried such that the meat curls up like a tiny octopus) a breaded pork cutlet, an egg omelette, and a salad all served alongside a bed of rice. Each different type of food is carefully in its own little cup, and overall the presentation swings far towards the cute end. “They’ve all got different things. Here.” He hands it to Rayena.

Rayena Corsano looked at the bento box and gasped. "It's so cute!" she beamed, placing down her sandwich and taking one of the boxes and starts to eat it. "Maybe I need to learn how to make this. I am not very good at Eastern food but, fish dishes and baked things, I am pretty good at." she giggled.

Munchix Bogbelly: “Being cute seems to be a big gobbin’ part of bento. I’m still learning myself, but I could teach you what I’ve figured out so far.” He reaches into his bag and grabs a bento for himself, enjoying it alongside Rayena’s lemonade.

Munchix Bogbelly sips the drink wistfully, and slowly shuts his eyes. Sure, there were things he had to get to. Like gathering samples from the trees, and determining whether its petals had any culinary potential. But for now, it was enough to relax under the sun with a friend and good food at his side. It was enough.

[doomedandstoned]

BAILEY’S CHOICE

Youngblood Supercult guitarist Bailey Gonzales shares her 10 favorite albums of Autumn.

Photo by Johnny Hubbard at Doomed & Stoned Fest

First off, let me preface by saying that this list is just a fraction of what I would include on a good, solid Autumn playlist, but everything must end at some point. Most of these you’ve probably heard, some you may not be familiar with, and others perhaps long forgotten and thus need a good revisiting. So here goes:

1. Crosby, Stills, Nash, & Young – Déjà vu

This has been in my catalog since I first started smoking weed in the fall of my freshman year of high school and learned to enjoy the hazy, beautiful strains of intricate harmonies that permeate CSNY’s iconic brand of folk-blues rock. Their albums were always on rotation in my house when I was growing up, but until I started to fully understand its cosmic, layered beauty, Déjà vu fell more or less into the “lame music my parents listen to” category for me. Now it’s a staple, especially as the weather starts to cool and the leaves start to turn, and I’m thrown into some kind of sepia-tinged yearning for the past. Funny how things change. This album holds some of the group’s most acclaimed work; I can’t point out a single track I’d skip over.

2. Graveyard – Graveyard

Graveyard by Graveyard

Speaking of high school—I grew up in a very small town in Southeast Kansas, and when MySpace made its debut (yes, MySpace), I found a page for this indie label called Tee Pee Records that absolutely dictated what I would listen to take the edge of my Black Sabbath cravings—this is where I was ultimately introduced to stoner rock and all of the branches of the retro heavy metal genre—and one of them that always stuck with me as I worshipped this label’s releases thereafter was Graveyard’s self-titled album. There are so many great tracks on this album, with “Thin Line” being an absolute favorite and even an echoing of one of my darkest autumn remembrances (won’t delve into it, but the subject matter will lead you where you need to go). Fantastic, timeless album.

3. Jonathan Snipes & William Hutson – Room 237

Room 237 (2012) is a funny little documentary. I love it, despite the fact that this film lays out conspiracies about Stanley Kubrick’s version of The Shining that range from absolutely Kubrickesque crazy-but-plausible to totally ludicrous, leaping-to-judgement scenarios and breakdowns related to the hidden puzzles within the original adaptation. But, we are talking about music here: this album plays like Stranger Things meets Goblin meets John Carpenter. There is nothing necessarily special about it, but in trying to find an OST that would fit neatly within this list, this fella kind of jumped out to me. Not everybody enjoys soundtracks, and while I could listen to creepy, ambient synth all day long, every day, Room 237 seems like it could entrance any listener, especially with standout tracks like “To Keep From Falling Off” to “Universal Weak Male” and even with the closing track, “Dies Irae” which plays off the original theme from The Shining.

4. Trouble – Trouble

It blows my mind that this album was released in 1990. Everything about it screams, “I WANT TO MAKE YOUR EARS BLEED: ‘70s METAL STLYE.” It’s like a lost and very angry Sir Lord Baltimore album was found in someone’s murky basement and sold in a musty, long forgotten record shop. The kind of place where you might hear whispers of dark legends. Somewhere that may be evocative, in legend, of the kind of place that Mayhem’s late singer, Dead, slit his wrists, throat, and blew his brains out and everyone commenced for this orgiastic blood feast of mourning to say, uh, “let’s take a photo of his dead body and slap it on a bootleg album cover and make necklaces out of his skull...” It’s not that harsh, but there’s definitely something spooky, dark, and forbidden about it. You may ask yourself, if you’re just hearing this album for the first time: “Why don’t they play some of these tracks on the radio?” Well, my child...do you really want to know?

5. The Steepwater Band – Revelation Sunday

This collection of hot tunes from The Steepwater Band is, apart from 2011’s Clava, one of our band’s road staples. We often don’t agree on much when that road cagey feeling hits or when disagreements happen, which incidentally is why things tend to work well with us, but The Steepwater Band, Mount Carmel, and Gary Clark Junior are all things we can come to terms with through the van’s trebly stock speakers. Maybe it’s the bluesiness. Very moody folk-blues rock tunes, with a touch of whiskey-fueled country, is what these guys exhibit in songs like “Slow Train Drag,” “Dance Me A Number,” and “Steel Sky.” A plus material, in my book, and good for the road on a cold night’s ramble.

6. Black Sabbath – Never Say Die!

Can people stop it with the “I’m tired of Black Sabbath” comments??? You know they are the reason we’re all here, and whether you like to admit it or not, you dig a good Sabbath tune either once in a while or every day. Doctor’s orders. Now I don’t think that a playlist is complete without a Black Sabbath album, but autumn seems the appropriate time for their fumbling, but strong conclusion — 1978’s Never Say Die!   And I really don’t care that I know I’m in the minority for loving this album. To me, while it’s their most strained Ozzy-era album (I won’t even touch 13, so don’t ask), it’s full of premonitions of things to come, including a full out jazz brawl in “Breakout” that reminds me of the mean streets in Dirty Harry, and songs that might make the bravest of our genre cry, like “Junior’s Eyes.” “Shock Wave” goes through the typical rough and tumble changes that Black Sabbath fans learn to embrace, but it comes in wave after wave after wave. Hell, even the title track is nearly full-out punk rock. If you’ve avoided this album, please—give it a spin. Even if it’s only to hear Bill Ward sing. It’s the album I fell into when I joined my first band in the fall of 2008 and what pushed me into the direction of branching out to things I’d long avoided. I literally shit my pants every time the first synth breakdown in “Johnny Blade” comes over the speakers, and I think you should, too.

7. Madonna – Madonna

Speaking of shit you probably don’t wanna read…who out of us has given Madonna’s 1983 debut a spin? Anyone? Bueller? Yeah, I didn’t think so. For you folks who can appreciate this one, I applaud you for admitting it. It’s not a sin to listen to Madonna (tell that one to the Vatican), but unless she’s been covertly transformed into Lana Del Rey or someone else on the darker and more modern side of the pop spectrum, you’d be hard pressed to find an admitted fan in our heavy underground group. And you know what? I don’t give a single fuck (yes, I learned that language from M herself). She’s a goddess, an icon, a killer songwriter—if you don’t believe me, tell that to the $400 million she has neatly tucked away—and dammit, she taught me to give a little less of a fuck in times where I don’t have too many to spare. This is another reason my parents are badass. Who in the world would buy their kid the “Like A Virgin” album only if their 11-year-old can ask for it by name without getting too embarrassed at the thought of saying “virgin” out loud to the Camelot Music clerk? Yeah, that’s right. Anyway, listen to this. Just do it...Madonna would.

8. The Midnight Ghost Train – Buffalo

Buffalo by The Midnight Ghost Train

I met Steve Moss at a show in Topeka in late 2009 at a dive bar where the drummer from my first band was singing in his new group. We did the obligatory thing and then, holy shit—this band starts playing and glasses start clinking and I swear to god I thought the whole damn place was going to cave in. They play a bunch of tunes and I’m so fully entranced it’s stupid. After the show, I went up to their singer/guitarist and said, “Um, that was really fucking awesome. I loved how you slipped “Hand of Doom into the middle of one of your songs.” Bam. We were instant buds. I couldn’t believe that they had come out of Topeka, Kansas. Later, while they were prepping to record 2012’s Buffalo, we had a very memorable fall jam session and some shows together, and EVERY. DAMNED. TIME. I felt like there was just something insanely special happening. Buffalo proved to be an instant classic, and even though The Midnight Ghost Train boys seem to always be on tour, I visit with my old pal Steve from time to time when he’s around, and nothing can erase those crazy, almost LSD-like imprinted memories of our house shows together. Hell, we reunited again just last month in another Topeka dive bar. I still have almost 3 hours’ worth of an interview I need to write that documents Steve’s early life up until the recording of Cold Was The Ground. The circle goes round and round. And I sure as hell can’t shake that sound.

9. Creedence Clearwater Revival – Green River

I don’t know what everyone else thinks about when they hear the track “Green River” from Creedence Clearwater Revival, but I think of Gary Ridgeway. I know that’s way far off, but I can’t help it. I also think about the album cover, and how many people still try to copy it, unintentionally. And I think about Stephen King. If you’ve read a few of his novels, you know from some of his passages, he’s a total CCR freak. I’ll give him a pass for mentioning Springsteen so much just because he’s a damn genius. But I bet the casual listener has never heard the song “Sinister Purpose” on the radio airwaves. It sounds like it belongs on a damn Leaf Hound album or something. Thank god for small favors. This is the epitome of southern blues rock. All you Lynyrd Skynyrd fans can fight me (although I won’t knock them), but CCR has earned their grimy, yet rightful spot as the Bayou’s most raw and creepy rock group. And way down in the fall, there’s always a bad moon rising.

10. Buffalo – Dead Forever...

Man, I was going to write up a few more albums, but this is the end of the line, folks. Australia’s Buffalo caps it off with their 1972 album, Dead Forever...   I can see this piece being released today, and that’s why I’m so glad everyone in this community puts out music that can rival little-known bands like Buffalo. I have a sweet spot for this group. Nobody will ever be able to answer why this killer band could never receive any airplay, and that question still lingers as absolute over processed shit continues to infiltrate the airwaves and real emotion can’t shine through. One of the promotional stickers for this record was, “Play this album LOUD.” Seen that before? Is history repeating itself in belittling our efforts to get out there and WARP THE FUCK out of people’s minds? I guess so. But we can fix that. Put the needle on some Buffalo, don your battle jacket, and work on getting some fuzz into some onlooker’s ears. Listen carefully, and don’t let the Buffalo situation happen to us all.

Hear Bailey's 'Autumn Vibes' Playlist on Spotify

Photo by Johnny Hubbard

The Great American Death Rattle by Youngblood Supercult