#cleaning prussia

[local-hyena]

Hetalia is my favorite anime ever. It as also a very weird anime that has quite  abad reputation. I watched the entre thing in three weeks (6 seasons of 12 to 24 episodes) in january 2021, then wat hed the movie in february. The 7th season was rekeased in April that year.

The story is... inexplicable. In fact, it doesn't really have a story at all. Hetalia is a parody anime, excepts is parodies History. The characters are human versions of countries. Each episode is 5 minuts long, add to that the opening and ending, they are extremly short. Every episode consist of a couple of skits. As I said, it is a parody anime that bases itself on History, so it somehow has an educative scope. For example, it made me learn that Lithuania was unified in 1236.

Now how could I talk about Hetalia without talking about its humor ? It is... absurd. Nonsensical. The only thing you think about when watching this anime is "what the sweet fuck is that ?". It's the kind of anime you either obsessively love or hate with a burning passion. I am in the first category.

Another point worth mentionning : the difference between the japanese version and the english dub. It's affected by what I call the "Ghost Stories Syndrome". In case you don't know what Ghost Stories is, it's an anime about teenagers chasing ghosts in their school. The japanese version is perfectly normal, but the english dub it... well, it's quite parodic. Lots of jokes, improv... the most famous clip is one in which a girl brought her dead bunny back to life or something and tells its ghost "it could have never worked between us ! Not because you're a rabbit... but because you're black !" This one : https://youtu.be/RINHjxsPOEg?si=jtWIBZkkWZtzE7U-. See what I mean ? Well, it's the same with Hetalia, excepts that the original material is already unhinged. I watched the japanese version, but watched enough of the english dub clips to admire how insane the english voice actors were.

Hetalia started as a webcomic, then there was the manga, the anime, the movie and musicals. There are also at least two official games, a bunch of albums and various proeminent fan-creations (HetaOni, Auf Wiedersehen Sweetheart, Gutters, The Danish Slaughterhouse, 23.5)

Now, would I recommend this anime ? No. Don't watch it. It's hell in there. Most fans will tell you that they hate this show and it's for a reason : it traps you. Once you're in, you can't get out. They say there is a thin line between crazy and genius, and I am convinced that Himaruya Hidekaz himelf is that line. But that's my thing, I like crazy stuff :]

[floralcrematorium]

wait, wait, wait, wait, wAIT

IS CLEANING PRUSSIA WHERE THIS IMAGE ORIGINATES FROM??

HUH????? I'VE HAD THIS IMAGE IN MY CAMERA ROLL FOR 7 YEARS.

7 YEARS.

i'm assuming cleaning prussia used some of hima's drawings, but what chapter did this come out of??? where is it from?????

[kamizuya]

Hetalia Doodles for a crack fanfic "Cleaning Mr. Prussia - Russia Route".

Fanfic Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/58632388

[miikoissant]

Why is Prussia here

[eisenrosen]

No I’m not done spamming my creations.

[where-is-my-beheading-ceremony]

Brainrot is real and it's name is Pruliet

[lemondropkaity]

Why are clothes so hard?

[fluffywhump]

Got bored at work and started adding songs to a new playlist

[the-heaminator]

Currentky listening to a german lullaby at 1 40 in the morning and it is giving me so many Belichmidt brother thoughts.

Said lullaby

[clearmindwindowcleaning]

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[gmb-gutter-solution]

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[goldammerchen]

(cleaning mister prussia... 2010)

april fools + april fools (2011 + 2007)

[504py]

Yandere Prussia Relationship Headcanons

Gender neutral, no use of Y/N, NSFW, murder, kidnapping mention, stalking, long post ahead!

we're SO BACK JOE. i apologize in advance if i write him strangely 😭😭🙏 but here it is! come get y'all juice!! slowly coming back to hetalia, so my inbox is once again open!!! hope y'all like it!

┊͙✧˖*°࿐

How the relationship started...

Gilbert is a very competitive man, and he can't help but be attracted by challenges, even if those challenges are ones that he himself proposes and the other party is completely unaware. This is what has unfortunately happened between you two, and it all started when you rejected his advances towards you.

I apologize for saying this, but I feel that Gilbert is a bit of a "nice guy". He saw you initially as just some pretty person he could fool around and flirt with, but you, obviously, saw right through his act, and said something that stuck with him.

"Are you normally this pathetic?"

He's taken aback, and his red irises shake a little.

Of course, he's used to insults being flung his way, what with how he acts, but a shot to how cool he perceives himself to be would stick.

His white brows crease his previously smirking face, before snapping back.

"Well fuck you too!"

Gilbert wouldn't have any contact with you following this interaction for a long while, and while he tries to forget you and erase you from his memory, you and your words have been laser-burnt into the creases of his brain. You and your damned smile when you look at anyone other than him, the softer tone your voice takes when you talk to other people, versus how your voice seems to have been drained of all enthusiasm and feels like it's a knife dripping with venom when Gilbert talks to you. Why didn't he deserve that nice treatment, too? Was he not even deserving of a small smile from you? He wants you to like him, too. He wants to be the person you like the most; to be the best.

Which resulted in him showing up at your door one evening with flowers and your favorite takeout.

Why does he know your address and why does he know your favorite food and flowers, you ask? Don't worry about it (He was obsessively stalking your social media during the month he was gone).

Gilbert apologizes to you, he sounds sincere, and like the oh-so kind person you are, or maybe you just wanted the food and flowers, you let him into your home.

Expectations...

Gilbert is a very insecure man. His only expectation is for you to look at only him and to love him only. Perhaps he wants you to love him the same way he loves you, obsessively, but he does like the challenge.

He feels like, maybe, if he can fully prove himself to you one day and have your validation, only then can he truly see himself as worthy, as the best for you.

He would have a lot of tunnel vision when it comes to you. To Gilbert, the rest of the world doesn't matter, because you are his whole world. He does tend to look pretty stupid because of it sometimes, but he couldn't care less.

You want him to cook and clean around the house? He'll do it.

You want him to change up his style even if he doesn't really like it? Of course he will!

You want him to carry all the bags while you're out shopping? In a heartbeat. Plus, he gets to show off his strength too. He'd carry you too if you allowed it.

Even if he tries his best not to come off as cocky, he really does like showing off. Being with you has sort of domesticated him, so he'd be a lot more shy about making a show of himself.

I think he'd act like this irregardless on if you accepted him as your boyfriend or not, if anything, I think he'd be even more of a doormat if you refuse to accept him.

He'd get crazier and crazier with his attempts to prove himself to you, such as buying extravagant gifts, doing anything and everything under the sun and moon for you, hell, he'd even legally change his name if you didn't like it.

If you still don't accept him despite everything he's done, I think he'd snap and just take you. He'll keep you with him so you won't run away and he can have as many attempts as it takes to prove himself to you.

But I imagine you'd cave from the guilt and persistence, and eventually accept him. At which, he'd literally scream from relief and happiness and swing you around, before realizing how rough he's being with you and hurriedly putting you back down and apologizing.

Yet he still has that wide toothy grin the whole time, and he keeps petting your hair and holding your face in his hands adoringly. It feels that, from that moment on, there would never be a moment where he'd be unhappy ever again, and he'd never allow you to be unhappy either as long as he's around.

It is genuinely very hard to make this Gilbert upset, because there are very few things that do...

Punishments...

Gilbert really hates it when you express any sort of affection towards anyone or anything other than him.

Yes, anything. He gets jealous if you show too much affection over his dogs or fawn over them too much. I'm seriously saying this, I think he'd later show up with a collar around his neck, crawling on the ground and rubbing his head against your thigh like a mutt. This could either come off as comedic or attractive depending on you, but either is a win in Gilbert's book, since at least he's got your attention now.

If you have any personal toys of your own, he'd get kinda emotional and ask you to throw them away, then ask what they do that he can't. In some time (and by that I mean later that night, maybe even right away), he'd prove that he can provide you with so much more pleasure and relief than those toys ever could.

Probably even to a fault, he'd keep overstimulating you and forcing orgasms till he was satisfied, till he believed that it was drilled into your brain that only he could do these sorts of things to you. And, also, that if you make him jealous like this again, it'll be another one of these long, torturous, sweaty nights...

I guess these aren't really punishments to a lot of people, because in my book only one thing could make him so genuinely upset that he'd be anything other than doting towards you, and that would be flirting with someone else. He'd try to deny it, but then he'd be inconsolable and crying for weeks, having nights where he'd be begging you to say that it never happened, or that the other person meant nothing to you.

"They r-really mean nothing to you? You mean it, babe?"

Then an idea pops into Gilbert's head, one that makes his heart rate pick up and his pupils dilate.

He kisses you, says that he loves you, says goodnight, then he'd be eerily... calm for the next few days. Usually he'd be more skittish and closed-off following whatever you did, but now he's acting like nothing ever happened.

Until one day, he shows up with that other person, bound and gagged, and a gun.

"G-Gil, what is thi-"

"They mean nothing to you, right?"

"Y-Yes, but-"

Then the gun fires, and it happens so quickly that you can barely process it.

This is only a hypothetical scenario, if you were ever to do something like that. It'd be really easy for Gilbert to slip into a psychosis and believe he was doing the right thing by murdering someone.

If anything, he sees it as another means of proving himself.

"There's no one else who would kill for you like I could."

All in all, he isn't easy to anger, but unfortunately I can't say the same thing about him and murder...

Rewards...

Luckily, as long as you're fully loyal to him, all you'd have is a boyfriend who is doting to a total fault.

As long as you've got a good tolerance for cringe, being with Gilbert should be relatively stress-free.

Gilbert's love languages are words of affirmation and physical touch. You could imagine what the two combined would be... Yeah, he's got a huge praise kink.

But as for ways he shows his love towards you, it's definitely acts of service and gift giving. He lilkes gloating a lot, and that's especially true when it comes to the two of you.

He enjoys showing you off. He likes buying gaudy things for you and himself– a huge fan of matching outfits– and taking you out on flashy dates. If you're comfortable with being posted on his social media, best believe he'd be spamming his with you ALL the time. Even if you're not being physically being shown, he'd write about you in his tweets, captions, and stories constantly.

"CHECK OUT THIS EPIC BAG I GOT FOR MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!"

And around twenty-eight people respond like "Didn't you just get them one the other day??"

If you're one to hop between interests and hobbies a lot, or just have any hyperfixations in general, best believe Gilbert will be fueling them LOL.

Gilbert can be really overbearing with his affections, but to him it's just because you deserve it so much. Only the best for the best, right?

He can't help it either, the most rewarding thing he's ever felt is that feeling he gets after he gives you a gift or does something for you. You get this adorable look on your face, smiling at him like he was the stars in the sky and singing out the sweetest compliments and thanks. It's all so worth it.

Normally I'd delve into what Gilbert would love to receive from his partner in return, but in all seriousness, I really do think all he wants is praise and your sole affection.

Like Alfred in my last headcanon post, Gilbert is really noisy, but I think he'd willingly make an effort to change that for you. Not because you asked for it or anything, but just cause, this way, he can appreciate all the tiny little things about you even more.

He realized this, when, one day, he noticed you frown a little before you smile. He wonders why he's never noticed this, and he realizes it's because he closes his eyes right when he starts to laugh. He starts to wonder what other little details about you he's missing out on, so he watches you more carefully in that effort.

Inadvertently, this has made him more calm and quiet since he's so concentrated on you. He likes it, though.

I think, what punctuates Gilbert's character here, is his willingness to change and bend for love's sake.

He does say he loves you very often, to the point of it being annoying sometimes, but he sincerely does mean it. He doesn't say it as just fluff.

However, you'll feel it most with the way he looks at you.

"You have a mole on your back. Did you know that, babe?"

┊͙✧˖*°࿐

(art used is mine, so please do show it some love on my blog as well! thinking of starting a taglist?)

[eisenrosen]

Remind me to expand on my Gilbert OCD headcanons when I awaken from my sickness induced coma [dies badly]

[enlitment]

-> Shout-out to prev's tags. Prev gets it!

Thank you, La Révolution française, for providing us with plenty of Robesmoulins sexual tension for my edit.

[atom-writings]

HAIII could you write the heta men of your choice with a gn s/o who acts like a cat?? (rubbing their head in their arm while cuddling, BITING (affectionate), knocking shit over to get attention, and most catlike of all LAYING ON/CUDDLING THEM RIGHT WHEN THEY NEED TO GET UP)

hetalia romano, prussia, canada, russia, england, and america with a catlike s/o

1.1k words ~ gender neutral headcanons

tw: a couple suggestive implications, but thats it!

a/n: people who let me do guys of my choice i am hopelessly in love with you. thank you.

Romano

Romano is such a cat boyfriend, so good luck with that. Absolutely nothing is getting down in your household, I guess.

He finds your catlike affection cute for a bit, but it's definitely not his favourite. He'll happily cuddle whenever you want, just don't bite him! it's weird...

But he'd love how you always lay on him when he needs to do something. He didn't want to do it anyway. Now he has an adorable excuse!

When you push things off counters, he just doesn't care. Sure, he'll give you attention, but only briefly. His house is a mess, a broken glass is nothing new. Plus, he does the exact thing to you all the time.

Basically, he's fine with it. Would prefer a more... mature S/O, but internally he knows he's just as bad as you when it comes to that. Maybe that's why you get along so well!

Prussia

Gilbert will never let anyone know this... but he's secretly a cat person. His massive dog army would make you think differently, but trust me on this (;

He'd just think you're SO cute! It doesn't even register to him that what you're doing is weird. He's just like, “Oh, you're headbutting me? I'll headbutt you back.”

His intense touch starved-ness makes your clingy and cuddly nature a perfect fit for what he wants.

Knocking stuff off counters would also work crazy well on him. As soon as you do that, he's running over and desperately cleaning everything up. You've got his full attention. First, he'll ask if you're ok, and then he'll get pissed. He promises to “punish” you later too...

(By “punishment,” he means he's gonna make you watch his terrible nerd shows.)

If you tried laying on him to get him to stay, he's just pushing you off. If he's in a particularly affectionate mood, he'll stay for a few more moments, but generally, you're just gonna end up on the floor. He's got stuff to do!

Canada

Matthew just... really doesn't know how to handle your affection. He hasn't had any romantic partners in a long time, so his only real reference for modern love is TV shows. And... they definitely don't act like cats in those. Are you weird, or is he?

He'll be super awkwardly accepting of it. Ok, you're curled up in his lap... so he pets your hair, right? When he wakes up to you laid flat over his body like a blanket, he just... doesn't know what to do. Where does he put his hand? Does he push you off?

Eventually, he'll get it. Then he's gonna go full cat owner mode. Constantly checking in with you, making sure you're always entertained, and cuddling you constantly.

He doesn't appreciate you breaking things to get his attention though... like, he's always willing to give it to you! No questions asked! You don't have to go to such drastic measures to get a hug.

If you flop on his lap when he's about to get up, he's just gonna accept his fate. You'll get no protests from him. Just... let him know when you're done, k?

Russia

Ivan doesn't even question anything you do. He just finds your cat-like behaviours super cute! It just makes him want to indulge you more.

Whenever you force him to continue cuddling, he just laughs and concedes. He's never had such a clingy S/O, and it makes him want to protect you even more.

However, this kind of thing does make him infantilize you even more. But on the bright side, expect him to buy you lots of cute clothes and build pillow forts for you two often (He might buy you a collar too ;)

He really doesn't mind you biting him. Once he knows you're alright with it, he'll probably bite you back! It's a weird point of pride for him to be covered in your little teeth marks.

Surprisingly, he also doesn't mind you breaking things to get his attention! He finds it... oddly romantic. Like, oh, you care about me enough to cause damage to things? Wow, you're so dedicated! (He has... problems.)

Basically, a S/O that acts like a cat would be great. He's such a dog boyfriend anyway.

England

Arthur doesn't see this as “acting like a cat” as much as he sees it as “immaturity.” Surprisingly, unlike how he feels normally about childish S/O, your behaviour could really grow on him. Of course, he'll always huff and sigh when you rub yourself against his arm anyway, but still!

He WILL get very annoyed by you sitting on his lap while he's busy though. Like, if he's just reading, whatever. But if you interrupt him when he's about to do something, he's just forcing you off his lap and walking away.

Also, do NOT break his glasses. Pissing him off like that will only make him ignore you more. Besides, if you wanted a super attentive partner, you really shouldn't go for Arthur anyway.

But despite all that, he really adores your habit of biting him. As long as it's not too painful, he does get a kick out of it, weirdly. When he bites you, it's always in a more... sensual way, but he adores how you do it so affectionately.

Basically, yeah, he thinks you're cute. But it's easy for you to get on his nerves if you act like that.

America

Alfred... doesn't really mind. But he thinks it's more entertaining than cute. He definitely realizes what you're doing early on in the relationship, and loves to tease you about it.

But... he also can't help the urge to take care of you because of it. He makes sure to always leave cute little snacks in your bag in case of emergency, and he NEVER misses a call from you. He gets a little paranoid about you getting taken advantage of because of how immature you can be.

You can bite him. He probably wouldn't even notice you did so.

However you show affection, he'll reciprocate. He's not much into the headbutting thing himself, he's a lot more uh... traditional? But he loves it when you do it!

He has to resist squeezing your cheeks every day that he wakes up next to you. It keeps getting harder.

You pushing stuff off every surface doesn't make him mad per se, but he definitely doesn't enjoy that habit. (Specifically, he would buy a bell that means you want attention. It's much cuter that way, and also you aren't breaking his things.)

In conclusion: it would be a very sweet relationship (: