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imfinereallyy · 2 years ago

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Eddie grew up as a creature of the night. It was to no one’s surprise really. The day was exhausting but the night was always full of this chaotic energy that he loved. The night was mysterious and other, the wonders of it still unexplored.

Eddie felt one with the night. He made friends with the moon and the stars. And although there were times that would pass where he could not see them, where there was nothing but the inky abyss, he knew they were still there. Hidden but never gone.

It started when he was young, his love of night. Eddie thought it had probably started when he was just a boy. Dumped his Uncle Wayne’s doorstep. He had been terrified, whisked away by a father on the run just as dusk brushed against the horizon. They had made it to Wayne’s trailer precisely as the evening settled into its peak. Eddie’s father hadn’t even bothered knocking. Just left Eddie on the porch with one backpack and a buzzed head. And Eddie waited there for a moment, looked up at the sky and thought it wasn’t that lonely with stars out.

His wondering mind was interrupted by Wayne pulling the door open and yanking Eddie inside no questions asked. The night was when Wayne had given Eddie a home.

As the years past, his fascination with night only grew stronger. It helped bring people closer to him. Eddie interpreted the night into campaigns, songs and even advice for the kids (lots of night metaphors for failed dating lives). He got most of his work done at this time. His mind coming alive and bursting with ideas. Wayne’s schedule was at night too. So when he worked, Eddie shared odd meals with his old man. And when Wayne was off, his brain like Eddie’s ran with the schedule of the moon.

The night also helped Eddie learn to be okay with being alone. Late night drives. Walks in the woods. Stargazing from a picnic bench. All things he had learned to enjoy his own company while doing.

It wasn’t that he didn’t like they day per say, or the sun. It’s just that Eddie had found the day boring. There was no wonder, no lust, no mystery. There was no appeal. The world was too bright, too open. There was no exploring and there was no comfort. Just exposure.

Then Eddie met Steve Harrington officially. Well, officially for the first time after everything. After the High School bullshit. After the wild adventures of the (please god never again) Upside down. When Eddie met Steve officially, in his hospital room, he is baffled to find him awake at 6 am, with a smile on his face.

And all Steve said was, “Glad you made it to actually see another sunrise.”

Like it was nothing. Like at of all the things that had blown Eddie’s mind the past week, or even more specifically out of all the things Eddie had learned about Steve Harrington, the thing that absolutely floored Eddie was the fact the Steve Harrington was a morning person.

It shouldn’t had bothered him so much. It wasn’t like he had been planning on become friends with the guy. But then he did, and Eddie couldn’t help but spiral.

Because no one should like the day as much as Steve did. Sure, Eddie was most definitely being a hypocrite. Like he had proclaimed himself as the goblin king of night once (although very drunk on Nancy’s whiskey), and Eddie prided himself on being a freak and accepting of everyone. So it was probably unfair of him to judge but this was excessive.

The day was everywhere when it came to Steve. He woke up early. He laid out in the backyard against the pavement. Steve would ask Eddie to go chase dawn with him on an early morning drive. It was in Steve’s wardrobe for Christ sake. That yellow sweater haunted his dreams, and Steve looked so good in it, and Eddie can’t help but stare—

The day was everywhere when it came to Steve Harrington.

And Eddie was damn fool who fell in love with him.

Eddie had fallen for the unattainable. The straight boy. His best friend. The guy who picked him up from a bad date in Indie no questions asked. The guy who shared a bed with him after plenty of nightmares. The guy who listened. The guy who cared.

The King and the Freak. The day to his night. The absolutely, infuriatingly opposite of what Eddie is allowed to like, allowed to have.

It had gotten so bad, that Eddie, when he couldn’t sleep and Steve wasn’t around, found himself whispering to the night about him. Told it how although Steve and the night didn’t meet very often, Eddie was certain it would love him anyway.

Eddie knew Steve was just as baffled by Eddie’s love of the darkness.He had asked once how he could stand it.

“Don’t the nightmares make you hate it? The lack of sleep alone makes me hate it, and that’s not even when I remember what the upside down looked like. No light, only hazy red darkness? Not for me man. Never again.” Steve had said while they passed a joint.

“I don’t know man, it’s not the nights fault really. Like it doesn’t matter the time of day, I still get nightmares. It’s not the night’s fault the Upside Down exists, and what it looks like. I guess I feel a solidarity with the night now. Even more than I did before. Something being blamed for simply being there. A scapegoat.” Eddie leaned into Steve’s side as he sunk further into the couch. He kinda feared he had said the word night too much in his speech.

Steve stared at Eddie for a moment, something of understanding passed on his face. “Actually, that kind of makes sense. I kinda expected you to talk in weird metaphors to explain it—“

“I still got stars wars analogy up my sleeve.”

Steve pushed on and ignored Eddie, “—but I get it. Like the night, you’re a reminder to people of the bad things that happen even if you’re just there, just existing…It’s complicated, and beautiful and very weird. Just like you”

Eddie didn’t hold back the smile when he said “Steve Harrington, are you calling me beautiful?”

“Yes I am.”

They stared at each other for awhile, no words spoken. It should had unsettled Eddie, or even spark useless hope in him. It didn’t though.

It just made him feel content. Good. Home.

He never felt the need to explain the night to Steve again.

Weeks later, Eddie learned why the day was good too. It was another night spent in Steve’s bed when the nightmares built up for days, with no end in sight. For once Eddie had woken up first. Steve’s head on Eddie’s bare chest. Eddie’s fingers combed through his soft hair, and he hummed softly to nothing but the dawn. The sunrise had started to slowly peak into Steve’s room. Because of course, even the day started towards Steve.

Steve’s eyes had fluttered open unhurriedly. Then he tilted his head up towards Eddie and did something that changed him forever.

Eddie expected him to freak out. For Steve to push him away in horror. To scream, and hit Eddie even. They had shared a bed before but it had never been that intimate. And Eddie knew his face wasn’t hiding any of his feelings either. Eddie, like the night, was only a mystery to those who didn’t know what to look for. And Steve always knew what to look for.

Steve did none of that though. Instead, Steve reached up slowly, brushed his lips across Eddie’s cheek and said, “Good morning, darling.”

Eddie felt his whole body stop and revive back to life in that instant. He died and became a new person. And then Steve, Steve took it even further when he laid back down on Eddie’s chest, without breaking eye contact, and beamed up at him.

Eddie now understands why Steve loved the day. It was because Steve loved the sun. And when Steve smiles at him, Eddie can’t help but think that Steve was the sun. And how Eddie loved the sun too.

Eddie couldn’t be stopped from kissing him in that movement.

Eddie kissed Steve like the morning. Slow, warm, and just as meaningful. There was no rush. It was waking up in comfort. Eddie had always imagined that if he ever got to kiss Steve it would be as chaotic and harsh as the night.

Eddie couldn’t find it in himself to want it in any other way in that moment. It made Eddie ache. It was sincere. It was sweet. It was devout.

Eddie leaned back to take a breath as he said, “Good morning, sunshine.”

———

this is my first stab at writing something eddie centric, so sorry if it’s rough, but it did come straight from the heart. I had fun writing it (as usual at 2 am, which is really in line with this narrative i now realize). It was fun to kinda project my own feelings do the day v night debate. I’m a night owl, and I love all things that come with it. But there is something so comforting about daylight and the warmth of the sun. <3

send me something to write next. :)

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angelynmoon · 1 year ago

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Eldritch Steve

Part 11

Eddie stared at Wayne, Wayne stared back, for several long moments neither one blinked but Eddie was human and so eventually he had to.

"Arg, remind me not to get into staring contests with Eldritch beings!" Eddie yelled as he rubbed his watery eyes.

"You never once won a staring contest with me boy, no reason to start now." Wayne said with a shrug, "You want coffee, Steve?"

"You're not mad at me for telling Eddie?" Steve asked, nervously.

"Surprised it took so long." Wayne handed Steve a mug, all of them had been replaced with the new two bedroom trailer.

Steve also knew that several soldiers had gone missing when they insulted Eddie in Wayne's presence, Steve had claimed he'd overheard them talking so he'd eaten them, which had the confronting soldiers cringing back and Owens blanching and making a quick escape.

"It wasn't my secret to tell, but he needs to know what being Mated to one of us means." Steve said, holding his mug in both hands.

"He is right here." Eddie reinserted himself into the conversation, "And I know what I'm getting into, Steve told me about spawning."

Wayne looked at Eddie and then at Steve, "How much did you tell him about spawning?"

Steve blushed, "As much as I know."

Wayne stared at him and then sighed, "Settle in, the both of you, we've got a long night ahead."

Because Wayne knew just how much about Spawning Steve knew or more exactly how little he knew. Spawning alone was different than Spawning with a Mate, and with the species difference, well, there were reasons that Wayne had yet to Spawn himself, and it wasn't just Eddie appearing on his doorstep.

As Eddie's adult he had a duty to prepare him, as the last Adult of his kind he had a duty to Steve too.

For all that Steve had killed their race he was, in fact, still considered a child of their race, not much older than those kids he'd claimed as his, if Wayne wasn't slightly afraid of Steve killing him like he'd killed all the others, he'd forbid them to even think of Spawning, but Steve was dangerous, though he did not appear so and Wayne doubted Eddie's affection for him would protect him for long if he stood in Steve's way.

So, Wayne would prepare them.

Because Spawn only appeared as eggs when one parent was involved, the embryo forming inside the parent and forming the protective shell on it's journey to the outside world.

Spawn that had two parent were born live and hungry, if Steve and Eddie Spawned they would need meat, raw and the fresher the better, ready for when their babies clawed their way into the world.

Eddie would have to distract them with the meat so Steve could heal, otherwise they might feast on his flesh, they ate their own for strength, afterall.

And Wayne would not be allowed near once Steve was expecting, Steve's instincts would see him as a threat to him and the eventual young, and Wayne couldn't say he wouldn't be tempted to eat the possibly runts, it wouldn't be the first time he'd eaten the newly born, he'd eaten several of his Spawnmates when he'd clawed his way out of his birth parent and his secondary parent hadn't been quick enough to fill his belly.

Wayne didn't remember Steve's Spawning parents, it was likely they'd abandoned him early on, expecting him to die quickly, some Spawning parents would eat their defective ones but others felt the need to let the other creatures have a taste of them. It was a testament to Steve's strength that he'd survived so long on his own.

Their race wasn't kind, not even to their young.

But maybe, Wayne thought as he looked at a waiting Steve and a trying to escape Eddie, he could change that, or at least Steve and Eddie could.

A/n: like I said Ao3 is down and well, I still have nothing better to do, so enjoy.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/48500452?view_full_work=true

Ao3 is back, so here's the link, I didend up calling it From the Rot, for now at least, thank you for all you suggestions though. <3

@addelyin @merricatty @lesbiabrobin @apuckishwit @0o-mushroom-o0 @starlight-archer @darkwitchoferie @just-a-tiny-void @swimmingbirdrunningrock @intergalactic-president-awesome @vampireinthesun @goodolefashionedloverboi @adhdsummer @purpleanimeoverart @space-invading-pigeon @lilaclilyroses @nohomoyesbi @plantzzsandpencilzzs @korixae @subversivecynic @flusteredcas @persnicketysquares @freddykicksasses @little-trash-ghost @cupcakesnwhiskey @cats-ate-all-of-my-pasta @planetsoda @paintsplatteredandimperfect @irregular-child @daydreamsandcrashingwaves @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring @steddieassheg0es

#steddie #eldritch monster steve #upside down creature steve #mpreg mention #wayne is the real mvp here #the birds and the bees talk #mentioned cannibalism #mentioned child abandonment #infantcide of sorts #culture building #if i can't read fic i will write it instead #ao3 is down #part 11 #From the Rot

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marietheran · 3 months ago

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reading AITAs to do with abortion is so painful because the question will be "Am I in the wrong for pressuring my 16yo daughter to get an abortion?" and the answers will all be "No, of course no one can expect you not to burden the girl with this for the rest of her life because you feel her child will be a burden on you" and "Tell her horror stories about pregnancy and being a single mother; that'll frighten her into compliance 😊💖😚"

#this is without even mentioning the Child in question #but let's be real all of them are pro aborts who would ridicule anyone suggesting they take it into account #... also that one post where someone was asking aita for abandoning my gf cause she wouldn't have an abortion #and the answers were 'yta for not being sterilised but since the child is there it's her responsibility'#if it wasn't a year old post I'd have had some choice Victorian words to say to that man #You my sir are the very example of an adominable cad and I wouldn't wish you on your girlfriend because you are clearly not worth anyone's #trust but also the barest decency you clearly don't possess would OBLIGE you to financially support the poor woman #for the rest of your miserable unworthy life #but it's a year old post so I'm ranting into the void here #therese rambles #pro life

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blu3cl0v3rs · 1 year ago

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Summary: Morro and Wu fly back home.

Warnings: Sobbing, unreliable narrator(?)

Prompt: Day 5 - Fly | "Time to go home"

Extra: Generic "what if Morro lived in the season 5 finale" AU. This oneshot is Morro and Wu's flight back to the Bounty, so they finally talk about their feelings. I hope you enjoy this!

"You can only save those who want to be saved. Goodbye, Sensei," Morro said with a bittersweet smile.

"Ugh!"—he shoved the Realm Crystal, the thing he worked so hard for, into his mentor's hands.

Then he let go.

He felt himself sinking, being dragged down to his watery death by her.

He heard the water lapping below him, threatening to swallow him whole, to consume him, to dissolve his ghostly body into nothing.

Until he heard a fleshy ripping noise. The muffled sound of The Preeminent screaming echoed from beneath him, and suddenly he wasn't sinking. He wasn't being held in a deathly grasp by his mistress. He wasn't being condemned to his oceanic end.

No, instead he sat atop an off-white scaly beast, with the sound of wings flapping in his spectral ears.

"Maybe you don't want to be saved, but this is not where your story ends, Morro," a voice, Wu's voice, uttered from behind. Morro whipped around, and there he was.

His sensei. His teacher. He… saved Morro.

"…why?"

"I should have stopped you from leaving the first time. I will not watch you leave again."

Oh.

Morro did not need to breathe. Ghosts do not have the ability to breathe.

So why did his throat hurt, like he's gasping for air while being choked?

Why did his eyes sting from tears his ghostly body cannot make?

Why did it hurt just a little bit more when Wu, his sensei, his father, hugged him despite Morro not being able to feel it?

Why did he feel the urge to wail, like a little child? Like he did when Mama didn't come back.

Muddled sounds of flapping wings and rushing winds broke him from his thoughts. Wu's dragon was soaring through the open sky, clouds distant and seemingly untouchable.

"You seem calmer now, my son."

Morro realized he was leaning against his master, and jerkily moved away. Wu shifted the reins in his hands.

Wait- "The Realm Crystal! Where is it?" Morro panicked. Did he knock it out of his hands? Oh The Preeminent was gonna-

Oh right. The Preeminent did try to kill him.

"It is safe. I dropped it off with the Ninja, so they could bring back Lloyd."

The wind elemental sighed in relief.

"I can't stay with you," Morro blurted.

"I don't see why you can't," Wu responded, his voice dripping in apathy.

"I- wha- I am a horrible person! I just tried to curse this realm! I-I possessed Lloyd, I tried to kill your Ninja, I have no redeeming qualities, I don't-..." he exhaled frustratedly, "I don't deserve your pity. I don't deserve this."

A beat of silence. Morro looked off in the endless blue of the sky.

"Well that's not right."

Morro was baffled. His sensei had obviously gone mad.

"Morro, you are my son. Adopted or not, you deserve my love, and I have failed you."

"You never failed me, I failed you. I should've lived up to your expectations-"

"But I did." Wu tilted his head back, as if the sky would tell him what to say next. "You don't need to be the best, you never did. I would've loved you either way, Morro. You're my son, you always will be. I should've made that clear. You do not need to be anyone or anything other than yourself for me to love you."

The feeling came back. Morro felt his lip quiver as he poorly restrained his feelings. He said nothing.

"I-I… I just wanted you to… be proud of me." His throat tightened more. "I thought that… if I was as great as you saw me, you would."

"And I should've shown I was. I was always proud of you, my son."

"...even now? I tried to ruin everything."

"Even now. Although I am quite disappointed you have used your training to destroy instead of protect, you are my son. And, I know you can do better."

Morro buried himself back into his father's shoulder. He sobbed, although tearless, as his father, his father, silently comforted him.

"Time to go home."

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spookytastemakercolor · 2 years ago

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CANNIBAL DAD

Dad! Bob x Baby/Kid/teen! Reader

Yes I have become a part of the Bob simps, BUT THIS IS NOT A FANFIC! No, THIS is Mista' Bob Velseb as a dad! Cause who doesn't want him as a dad? I know you heathens like me want him as a DA-, Ahem. Sorry for that. Anyway onto the post and enjoy! As a FYI some things may not be cannon.

Warning: Cannibalism, gore, mention of murder/killing, Abandonment, Cursing, Mentions of being drunk, Mention of trying to feed off of Bob (Don't.), Used as bait, knifes, bones, kid behavior but more unhinged

BOB VELSED

To say the least you're mother never even wanted you after getting drunk and sleeping with a notorious cannibal killer that was loose after he tried killing her one night.

Bob found out he had a kid when she just left you at the front door of his hideout in the winter with a simple note saying, " Here's your kid, I don't give a shit if you eat them or not but I'm not keeping them. " ( She didn't live long after that)

Definitely didn't know WTF to do once he got you inside (Man was not prepared). He stood in his living room holding you for about a hour debating whether to eat you or not.

Once you started to try and grab his sweater he decided to keep you and raise you, even if he was on the run or not you are his little ball of sunshine!

He sat on his slightly disheveled couch for about a hour trying to think of what to do. Sure he'd had one night stands before getting caught but THIS! This wasn't something he would have ever expected to happen as he looked down to the small infant wrapped in his sweater to keep them from the winter cold. He had just got back from killing that cursed woman who left you out in the cold but now he had no idea what to do, he was stuck between eating you or not.

Finally he decided to just eat you and as he went for his knife something snatched his 2nd sweater, he froze as his head slowly looked down at the small hands closed down on it as if asking to be held up closer to him. Slowly but surely he lifted you up and held you with one arm as his claw like hand went to grab your hands, you gave small coo's and babbles as you played with his fingers. He knew then and there he wouldn't let the world take you away from him.

Robbed a convenient store 5 hours after he realized he needs to get you food and supplies when you tried latching onto him. (Headlines were fucking CHAOTIC with the pictures and tape!)

Definitely experienced with some baby care knowledge. I will die on this hill.

Since he's on the run the house isn't in the BEST conditions. . . . . But he makes due with what he has and knows he can keep you warm through the winter!

He doesn't know how to handle you crying so he usually keeps a victim alive for help until eventually killing and cooking them. Can't have anyone see him be a softy

You're toys and chew toys consistent of bones, anything he steals off victims, his horns (Yes. He gives you the horns.) Any and all clothes, blankets, and victim hand's (Don't question how it stays fresh. . . .)

The girl kept screaming for bob to let her go as he made his way to his hideout, he was slightly running since he had gone out pretty far in the woods and was worried you had hurt yourself. He opened the door and could hear the little screams of his ball of sunshine, " I-Is that a baby? Oh god please don't hur- " " Quiet! Now I need ya' help and your gonna' help me or else I take ya' eyes and SHOVE 'em down your throat! "

Bob dragged her closer to the screaming as they entered and saw a little baracade of blankets with you in the middle screaming and crying. He let go of the girl and gently picked you up while turning to the girl slightly panicked " They been cryin' for 6 hours now and I can't find what's wrong, Now help me so they can stop! " she made her way towards you and held you close as they started to try and calm you down, which proved difficult from bob death staring them.

Slowly but surely you calmed down and looked up at the girl " Th-There we go, just tired aren't you? " she slowly rocked you back and forth to sleep as bob loosened up before taking you back and mimicking her movement while talking to you. She slowly made her way out of the door and bolted for the front door ' Finally! Freedo- ' it was short lived as they were yanked back by their hair and had their mouth covered " Now where do you think yer' goin'? I can't have you living after what you saw. . . . " she screamed, but being muffled, as bob dragged her to the basement.

As you grow older into the time frame of crawling or walking he had to start buildin' baracades!

Man saw you crawling for the first time and was starstruck! Until he noticed his knife hanging a LITTLE too close to the edge. Baracade numbro 1!

Now seeing as you are the child of a man who most definitely has ties to a certain cult and is definitely non-human in some way can he REALLY be surprised the first time you crawled on the ceiling and were over him while he tried to sleep?

Yeeeaaahhhh wall crawling? Be glad you haven't been stabbed or accidentally thrown when you fall off at random points

In total there are 13 baracades and 5 wall crawling stoppers (He got proper baby proofing materials later down the road, don't worry)

Ontop of the wall crawling is the, and in order of how he found out about them, Glowing eyes, Locking your jaw on anything that's flesh (R.I.P finger's from the chew toy) sounds like a demon escaping everytime you cry, demonic animal noises, and then finally you having surprisingly sharp teeth!

Bob held a camera as he set it up while setting you across the room " Ok, Come to papa! " you looked at him dumbfounded for a minute before starting to attempt to make your way towards him " That's it! Ya' can do it! " finally you started to crawling and his eyes got star's in them " There you go! Come on! " you were about half way before the lights went out and both your eyes started to glow " Oh shi- " before he could finish he heard you on the walls making those demonic noises that stuck in his nightmares " SHI-SHOOT! WHERE'D I PUT THE NET!!!! " he grabbed the little net bed as he tried finding you on the wall's.

" (N/N) WHERE ARE YA'! COME OUT FOR PAPA! " he went for the kitchen first until he heard you crawling on the ground in the living room then on a wall again, he went from room to room with you one step ahead of him until finally he decided to return on the power and look for you. " There now I can- " he covered his ears at the screech you let out from your guys room

' NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo!!!! ' he slammed open the door expecting to find blood from you getting his knife but instead found a broken bone and slightly chipped tooth. He let out a sigh of relief before cradling you and trying to calm you down ' I really gotta' get 'em some soft chew toys. . . . '

When you got to the stage of being able to speak and stand he is the type of man to try and make you say Dada but instead you say Mama. Also becomes VERY protective and cautious once you start walking.

Around this time he'll try to hunt more since when you were a baby he couldn't leave you alone so he was limited to hunt around him instead of far out. Also will refuse to take you with him no matter how big of puppy dog eyes you give him.

Never excluded sneaking out and following him when he didn't take you!

It was 8:00 and bob had finished getting his hair slicked back and painting his face, you were put to bed and should be asleep by now. He had been hungry for about 4 weeks now but can you really blame him? He had to take care of his little ray of sunshine that's you! " * Sigh * Finally, I can go out and get me some meat. Don't need to worry about littl' (Y/N) tryin ta' come along eitha' " He made his way out the front door not noticing two glowing eyes watching on the ceiling or hearing the little demonic giggle that came out of you while following after Bob.

------Time skip------

Bob pinned his victim onto the wall while digging his knife as far as he could into their abdomen while letting out a holler of laughter. " HAHAHA HAHAHA!!!!!! Oh how I've MISSED this! " he pulled the knife out as the victim sprayed blood from his mouth onto his clawed hand, they dropped limp as Bob released them to the ground before pressing his knee down into the wound while placing his knife into their neck. " Did you know- "

" MAMA! "

" W-Wha- " before the victim had more of a chance to speak bob squeezed their throat to make them pass out before turning to their littl' sunshine who ran up to him while making grabby hands " Mama mama!!!! Up up! " he picked you up with a big and slightly concerned smile, " Now how did you get here littl' lamb! " he could be mad another time. Rn, he just needs to take you home and bring the body with him " Mama, can I help? " bob was caught off guard but slowly he gave you a soft smile " Of course ya' can, just help papa with the body. " " MAMA! " he would have to find a way to break you out of the ' mama ' thing eventually, all that mattered at the moment was getting home and avoiding the approaching police.

He tries and take you out with him on peaceful walks and sometimes hunting since you will also most likely pick up cannibalism from bob and have his more sadistic traits, but you can cover them well like him too.

Since you now talk and walk he of course brings you little trinkets and gives you you're own room if you want one! If you don't he will build shelves from already broken ones or steal one for all your little gifts and finds. ( Has a secret compartment in his sweater where he keeps your drawings for himself 🤭)

He let's you keep whatever you want from a hunt and if you want something from a store he'll make sure to dress you up and wear a disguise so you can go shopping.

He also tries his best to pick up on sewing and knitting for you and himself. He remembered how much you loved watching people make things but never brought it up because you were so shy about it, so he surprised you with a semi wearable scarf! Since then he's been trying to do more but still needs practice.

You were waiting at the door for bob to show up again, you sadly couldn't got hunting with him but he promised to bring you back something special! Slowly you were loosing the battle of sleep until the door opened " Mama! " you never let him live the name down as you tried to jump up on him " Hey! How'd my little hell spawn hold up da' fort? " you straighten up while saluting to him " Guarded and secure! I even caught you a present! " you ran off to bring your gift over as bob set the multiple bags down on the fixed dinning table.

As you came back bob was slightly shocked to see the heavily bleeding and unconscious person you dragged along with you " I saw them in the woods lining the house and they tried to break in! " bob let a smile adorn his face, on that didn't look so crazy and forced, before picking you up and spinning you around as you giggled " Hahah! That's my girl/boy! " he set you down in a chair before pushing the bags towards you " Now you remember how I was gonna give you something special? Weeelllll I noticed you eyein' a few things in the store that you didn't grab sooooo- "

He didn't finish before you tore into the bags and started making excited demonic animal noises " Mama! Thank you! " you lunge to bob as he caught you and returned the hug " Anythin' for you my littl' sunshine. Now, how about I start dinner'? " " Yay! Dinner! "

Getting about 5-8 years old he allows you to venture out on your own but not to far to where he can't find you, but still you get to explore none the less. Of course you bring back things you find to bob which he cherishes with his life and makes sure to get you something back.

Buuuttttt your also a little rebel so you usually decide to go a LITTLE farther than allowed without him knowing.

This is also how you come across skid and pump one of the days you get lost and Bob's loosing his shit trying to find you and telling himself you're alright

Of course you make friends with the two and when you tell bob he is in a bit of a crossroad considering he tried EATING them last Halloween, But their your friends and he'll accept it eventually!

Are they allowed at the house? HELL NO! (Still sneak 'em in tho)

When he has a re encounter with the four people from last year because you were waving goodbye at the edge of the woods and he popped up to scold you for going out so far until seeing the four across the street. Cue awkward silence

Bob saw you waving towards the sidewalk across the forest and came up behind you with a worried but angry look " (Y/N) (M/N) Velseb. What are you doing out here? " " Mama! I was waving goodbye to my friends! " Bob turned to the sidewalk and froze as he saw the two familiar pumpkin and skeleton kid with two concerned parents. " Mama, can they come over for a play date PLEEEAASSSEEEEE!!!!!!!! " bob looked down at you with the biggest puppy dog eyes he could have imagined and felt his heart tighten as he looked back and forth between you and the others, finally he let out a sigh while looking at you " Fine. They can come but ONLY if you agree to tell me when to expect guest. Got it? " " Mhm Mhm! I got it! "

bob let out a tired sigh as you turned to tell skid and pump they could go over before happily climbing up to sit on his shoulders as you headed back leaving two very confused Lila and jaune behind with skid and pump feeling excited to have a new friend.

Now as I said, rebellious kid. Meaning you have gone into town which results in you getting both almost kidnapped by frank and having some very scary encounters with others.

Roy is a perfect example! Your first interaction was scary as shit for all of them cause you decide to pull the same did you know your old man pulled on them! Doesn't help you also have a Southern accent like him with a more deranged smile. Safe to say he don't wanna try shit with you

Other interactions that were tense at first are Frank, had tried bribing skid and pump with candy and you pulled off a head tilt with a smile which sent him driving, Dexter, you had met him when bob grounded you and he tried coming in through the front door, the cult, they had no clue of any ties between you and bob so they thought it was a good idea to try kidnapping you! Fucking. Not. Never came back to the house, and finally! Jack and john, you can use your imagination 🙃

Now of course once Jack and John find out you two are blood related (after you went to the police station because you lost bob on one of your hunts) they use you as bait every chance they get! Doesn't work out well though 🙂

You were currently sitting in a cell scared out of your mind and making the most eardrum bursting screeching anyone can imagine as you try to clue bob where you are. " Jesus! How the hell did that phsyco get laid and have this thing birthed! " John complained as you stopped and threw one of the pieces of the destroyed cell bed at him, he quickly ducked as you start giggling uncontrollably " That's not important! What is is that he shows up to try and get them out so we can catch him. " you started to actually loose your breath as you finally looked at the two with tears in your eyes while speaking " You can't catch mama! He's just gonna escape! "

You stopped laughing as the power went out and your eyes glowed as you started jumping up and down " Mama's here mama's here! " both men drew their guns as the turned on their flashlights trying to find him " Jack, get to the breaker box and turn on the- " before John could continue he was thrown across the room as Jack turned his gun and flashlight towards him, and oh BOY was bob pissed. He was in his signature costume drenched in blood and guts from what the flashlight showed.

" Did you know? " his voice was strained as his glowing eyes turned to jack before he was being held up by a claw around his throat " That you neva' fuck with a man who would do anythin' for his KID. " he blocked off more of Jack's airway before feeling a bullet got through his chest and hit Jack in the leg " MAMA! " you panicked slightly as you watch bob drop Jack and face towards the cowering John while smiling more pissed than ever " I'm alright sunshine! Just close yer' eyes and ears for me, well be home soon. " you followed his instructions as he lunged at John more determined than every to rip him piece by piece for putting you in a cell and trying to use you as bait.

This next section is for girl things, I'll do one for the boys but girls gotta be done first so I can get it out of the way

You have now entered teen years (11-18, sorry if you disagree) and guess what? You now have a period! Yaaaaayyyyyyyy........ Yeah god have mercy on anyone who hears the screams of demonic pain in the woods or enters the woods.

Bob has no experience whatsoever ever dealing with this subject so he is going to probably be the equivalent of a new dad panicking that his wife/girlfriend went into labor.

Tell him exactly what you need or this man will pop back up at the house with a human sacrifice ready for you to consume if it means he's safe from your wrath.

Be thankful he never dropped his sewing and knitting hobby cause you getting custom shit if it's certified help material

Bob had been pacing back and forth as he tried to think of how to help you as you were currently curled into a ball on his bed with blood all over your legs. He knew this day would come but he didn't think like this! Slowly you started to groan again as bob heard the slight clicks in it " Ok bob, what do you remember your ma' telling you and how ta' handle it. " he perked up when he thought he heard meat painfully came out of your mouth " Ok, I'll be back sunshine. Just stay tight and I'll bring ya' somethin' to help. " he exited the house now on a mission.

------Time skip------

You had been waiting for bob for about a hour now, the pain wasn't there anymore so you found it easy to shower and go about trying to stop the blood from getting everywhere. " I wonder why dad's taking so long..... " you chuckled slightly as you remember how you'd always say " mama " instead, just then the door opened with bob having a giant bag in his mouth while dragging a body behind him. He set the bag down before placing, who you recognize as a cashier, on the table.

" Ok I got whatever I could possibly think of before the police arrived and took me to a cell. " bob started pulling out all sorts of materials to help you before turning to look at you to see you facing the body " Dad, why did you bring a cashier? I thought we had enough meat? " he picked up the cashier before turning to you with a smile " For a offering so you don't kill me of course! " you almost laughed before composing yourself and looking at bob " Dad I don't need a sacrifice! Why in the world would you think I need a sacrifice???? " he scratched the back of his neck as you face palmed yourself not believing what was happening right now. " It's the thought that counts dad " you gave bob a hug as he hugged you back before turning to the now conscious cashier and punching them unconscious.

Hormones is 100% something he can't help you with even if he tried, but he's 100% gonna be your gossip buddy and do runway modeling for you if you pick up a habit of designing clothes or do things to help in anything you pick up (I can't help but imagine him striking a pose with duck lips as you laugh your ass off at his attempt at looking hot in a dress you made)

Having " The Talk " has got to be the only other time you've seen him visibly have to take more mental breaks than when he told you about cursing. Man was praying you'd stay little forever

He makes sure you drink your setting boundaries and respecting people who respect you juice 👏! (If you a Top he's gonna give you the finest gentleman juices in👏the👏world👏!)

One thing that's a constant he tells you is that no matter who or what you want to date he's gonna be happy as long as you are, so long as they pass his test! Also tells you if you do a secret relationship you better make it worth keeping it from your old man! And if they do something to hurt you or they weren't worth it YOU will be able to get all the revenge you want!

He really is just that dad who may not know anything about what happens when a girl matures but will happily try his best ever thought he knows absolutely nothing. Just don't bring up people drama cause you both gonna go and kill that person for dinner.

Bob heard the house door slam and saw you running up the stairs mumbling nope under your breath on repeat and red faced. He set down his book and glasses as he made his way up to your room that he gave you once you become 11, hearing you pacing and panicking made him slightly jog up and knock on your door as softly as he could. " Littl' lamb? Are you alright? Ya' ran up the stairs and were kinda' red. " " I-I'm fine dad! Nothing's wrong! " Bob was about to say alright but then something struck him like a hammer as he realized what was going on ' Right, she probably has a crush or her hormones must be going crazy. ' he opened the door as you stopped pacing and looked at him with some slight panic but tried to play cool as you smiled at him

" (F/N). I think it's time I talked to you about something. " you visibly tense as you sit on your bed while bob sits to your right " What do you need to talk about? " bob could see how tense you were before letting out a sigh and placing his hand on your shoulder " Listen kid, I know it might be hard now with all ya' hormones and feelings going haywire right now but, no matter what I'll always give ya' the same love I give ya' now. "

It was confusing to understand what bob was saying but you guessed you got it " Thanks dad? " that's when bob put on a smile before getting serious " But just so you know, if anyone hurts ya' or don't pass my test I ain't hesitatin' to kill 'em. And make a secret relationship' worth it! " finally you got what he was saying before and start laughing while bob tried to stay composed " I mean it! And make sure to get me some grandkids! " you laughed harder as bob slowly joined in.

Finally you both calm down and you give bob a hug as he wrapped his arms around you " Thanks dad. . . " " Anytime sweety'. "

Ok now that I've ran out of ideas for the girls it time for the boyz!!!!!!

First and foremost he is 10000% more prepared for this than anything for a daughter, I mean he had to go through this as well!

Boners and stuff of that nature is the easiest talk he's ever had to talk to you about. Man probably will give you the secret holy grail of how to hide a boner in any type of pants in this world

He still has the sewing and knitting hobby and I see him just crafting shit every teen boy would need to survive teen years. (ESPECIALLY if you get achne!)

He also gotta show you the groom my friends 🤌

It was around 10:00 and bob was on the verge of passing out from watching Kitchen Nightmares

(Fight me but he definitely watches it)

Until the scream of his son woke him up and had him running upstairs. He slammed open your rooms door as he searched around to find you sitting with the blanket over your head " (M/N)! Is everythin' alright!?!?!?!? " He made his way towards you and tried pulling down the blanket but you retracted and pulled it further on " Yup! Just a nightmare! " now bob knew this to be a lie so he had to think for a minute until remembering how old you were now.

" Son, pull the blanket off yer' face. It can't be as bad as some of the victums' I've seen. " Slowly but surely you pulled the blanket down to your shoulders as bob sighed with a slight smile on his face making his way towards you " Son I know you probably already know what's happenin' and I know this is probably scary but it's not as bad as it could be! " knowing how embarrassing but comforting this would be he pulled out a photo and handed it to you. " No way. Is that- " " Yup! That's my' freshman year picture. . . . " It showed a much younger bob with much longer hair than what he has now, slightly skinnier but still chubby body, and OMG he had a punk phase.

(YUP!, I feel like starting shit and just like with Kitchen Nightmares you can fight me because I'll die on these hills!)

But the one thing that had you in shock was to achne that lightly went all over his face " Go on, get it out yer' system! " and get it out of your system you did. When you finally calmed down as bob re-took his very much embarrassing high school photo, you look up at bob as you sideways hug with a smile on your face " Thanks dad, you really are the best dad someone could ask for. " Bob smiled as he hugged you back to the best of his abilities " Anytime. Now I gotta show ya' some tricks I learned for groomin'! "

Now, same rules apply with hormones. He may be able to give advice but he's not going to be fully there. Also applies with the interests, he will play basketball like he's 19 again until his leg gives out and your now trying to get him in the house so you can have him sleep like he's 80.

" The Talk " was so weird for you because he was bringing shit up that you ain't never fucking image goes with puberty. He just got no filter between what is happening simplified and what's happening with too much detail!

You getting your respect women juice and your gonna get your beat anybody's ass if they disrespectful juice! Man raising a gentleman! (If your a bottom he's gonna make sure your a power bottom, Mama don't raise someone who don't say what they want)

Dating rules and secret relationship rules still apply along with the revenge. This man is VERY supportive

He's all and all better at handling a boy than he is at handling a girl because this man is one of the most unprepared people possible for a daughter than you can ever imagine.

Bob had set down some plates as he made his way up to your room knowing you would have sneaked into the window to avoid him, but can you blame him? He's gotta worry when you have a temper that's almost got you and sometimes him caught (But he's proud). Getting to your door he heard you throwing things around the room while talking to yourself. He knocked as loud as he could which caused the room to go silent. " (M/N)! I'm coming in the room! " " Dad NO! "

Bob opened the door to a absolute mess, everything was thrown about or some destroyed as you stood in the middle gripping at your hair " (M/N)! WHAT'S WRONG!?!?!? " Bob ran to you, grabbing your shoulders and turning you towards him. You froze and went stiff as you started to well up tears " N-Nothing I just- I- " bob wrapped you in a tight hug as he tried to calm you down while you cried, calming down bob looked at you again and asked what was wrong. Letting out a sigh you looked away from him " I. . . . . I got a crush...... "

Bob got a smile on his face as he let you go and put his hands on his hips " Well who's the lucky gal'! " You rubbed your arm feeling nervous as bob looked confused, then he slightly went wide eyed as he let out a sigh putting his hand on your shoulder " Son. Listen. " you tensed up expecting the worst " I don't care who ya' love or what ya' love. Your still my kid. I'll be there for ya' no matter what. Just know if they dare hurt ya' anyway possible or don't fly with me I'm killing 'em. "

You smile as he hugged you, slowly returning the hug and looking up at him " Thanks dad...... " " Of course, just get me some grandbabies! " you laughed while going red as bob joined in with you before letting you go " Now, tell me about the boy who got my littl' devil's heart! "

Now gender neutral teenage stuff because I've got what needed to be divided slightly (Of course it's gonna be short so I can end my misery because my fingers hurting)

Kidnapping and going out hunting is going to be the most common things to happen.

Bob doesn't always go to your rescue every time though cause you handle yourself pretty well sometimes, RIP Jack and John's goddamn wallets from the hospital trips 💀

You honestly just get alot more freedom than expected but he still worries so you always gotta keep him updated every 6 hours

Bringing anybody home you like so he can meet them or a photo is a MUST. Don't want them getting accidentally killed!!!! Although it might sometimes be on purpose......

I imagine him starting to get you to be more social and him also trying as well while also being in disguise (I realized I forgot to mention this but bob will age just not as quick as you think he will)

You both walked down the park path making jokes and enjoying some quality time before night, since bob or you both would leave on your own seperate hunts. Sitting on a nearby bench bob gave you a tired lazy smile as he tried to catch his breath " I told you the hoodie was a bad idea. Besides nobody's here! " you opened your arms to make a point as bob let out a breathy laugh " I know kid, but I ain't as yong' as I used to be. I'm almost 100 you know? " you rolled your eyes at Bob's over exaggeration before sitting next to him " Lies. You look like your in your 60's. "

" Oh really? " bob looked at you before narrowing his eyes " How old do ya' think I was when you were a kid? " you crossed your arms as you looked at him " 34 " bob gave you a smile before leaning back on the bench " Wrong kid, 61. " you sprang up from your spot and got in front of him " WHAT!?!?!? How are you just now getting streaks of gray in your hair!?!?!? "

Bob let out a short laugh before looking back up at you " Have ya' ever wondered why ya' can do what you can do? " " Yes but I ju- " then it clicked " You were a cult member!?!?!?!? " bob stood back up again before giving you a smile and walking into the woods " It's almost night. We betta' head back. " you stood in stunned silence before quickly running up to bob sputtering on your words " HOW CAN YOU BRUSH THIS OFF!?!?!?!? "

Now to the faithful day somebody steals his baby's heart! Aka the day he becomes the most hardest man to please when you try dating someone.

Partners are a VERY hard thing to come across when you are the daughter of a notorious killer and killer yourself, plus the police and everything doesn't help either.

So saying you ACTUALLY found someone who isn't trying to collect some sort of bounty or apart of the cult he is V E R Y on guard. The first interaction feels like a stand off in the wild west between the two.

Now of course he'll want to know how you met up, so for your sake and theirs lie. Say you met in the park or somewhere instead of the truth which is you saw them on a killing spree and they saw you.

Staying for dinner is like a spin the wheel for how you will compromise dinner with bob. Human meat is DEFINITELY off the table so finding a substitute is key to them actually staying.

Overall this man ain't gonna chill until he's certain they can be trusted

The air in the room was heavy and felt like a snake, almost ready to tear out the poor boy/girl next to you who had a all cheery look. Bob sat across from you two and was silently death glaring them while you tried to think of a way to defuse the situation " Dad, this is (R/N). There my Boyfriend/Girlfriend. " bob looked at you briefly before looking back at the boy/girl next to you " So, (R/N). How did ya' meet my daughter/son/kid? " he was trying to scare the kid in hopes he'd give bob a reason to gut them on the living room floor.

" Oh! I had met them one night when taking a stroll around the park, they were alone and I was curious so I introduced myself and the rest is good memories. " you could hear the imaginary hammer hit one nail into a coffin with their name on it as you decide to quickly chime in to stop another one being hammered " It was after I left to hang out with Skid and Pump! It was beautiful outside and I didn't want to head home just yet. We hanged out for a while until I headed back and we just kept meeting up there. " That's when Bob's eyes got a sadistic look before he started rapid firing questions at your boyfriend/girlfriend.

" How often would they stay at your house? "

" Sometimes for 2 day's. "

THUMP. 2 nails

" How did ya' know where to meet up? "

" They would text me when and where before 6. "

" How did ya' already know where we live? "

" I've been inside before "

4. Bod started going for his knife.

" Do you know what we do for a livin'? "

" I've been told "

5. You kept your hand stead on your own knife.

" Do ya' know who I am? "

" Bob velseb. Wanted serial killer and cannibal. "

6. Bob started drooling as he prepared to stab him.

" And tell me young' man/woman. Where exactly do ya' work? "

" The butcher shop right by your old restaurant! "

Bob smiled and looked towards you " They can stay fer' dinner! " you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding as you hugged bob with a goofy smile before turning around and saying " Welcome to the family! "

FINALLY!!!!!!! FUCKING. FINISHED. This has been in my drafts since 2022 and I have poured way too much energy into this that I'm about to cry in joy for finishing.

Anyway I hope you enjoy this read and that it isn't disappointing for how long this has taken me. Request are open and pinned with all my rules and such if you want to request something. BYE!!!!!

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pizzaboat · 7 months ago

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Gwendolyn is such an ass mother. She's gotta be one of the worst Disney mom's. Almost if not equally as harmful as Odalia

And maybe that wasn't the intention with Gwen, and characterising moments would've existed if the show was longer

But man is toh good at introducing characters as utter assholes when you think about it for more than 2 seconds and then redeeming them five minutes later

I hate that character god. I could go on about how awful she is

#like wtf is wrong with that woman. you think for more than 2 seconds and you realise she abandons everyone in her life to cure Eda. and the #cures are just poisen. knives and crystals.#and she isn't actually there for the real things happening to her kids that she can help with #what do you mean you haven't been seeing your eldest child and that she considers a year visit worth being jealous over and #“regular” wtf #your youngest was nearly publically excecuted and you show up weeks after to mention it in passing?#I'm convinced she can't do feelings and emotional stuff and can only “provide physically”#and that's why she chases the cure as she feels shes failing as a mother #and she is!#shes awful!#eda clawthorne #lilith clawthorne #gwendolyn clawthorne

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the-axolotl-skellie · 5 months ago

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The man who played God.

Rewritten backstory! TDLR is Lune and Sol were supposed to be Vessels for these two gods to possess and save monsters. But Lune didn't come out right. Uhh TW for implied CSA, and child abandonment!

I purposefully also based Gasters skull off Papyrus, to more so show why Lune is afraid of Papyri. They... let's say Lune say Gaster without his mask alot.

The year was 20XX, underground, and a man named WD Gaster had a dream. To honour the God's that created monster kind, with a vessel worthy of their immortality. To hope they would come as ANGELs and save monster kind.

The man created two SOULS. One he created after painting of the Goddess in her mortal form, the Axolotl—That symbolized her healing and MERCY.

The other, after the warrior of the God, the Phoenix. Symbolizing strength and DETERMINATION.

As the two souls were created—One came out so... Perfect. The perfect vessel for the God that gifted the sun. The perfect skeleton that took resemblance of Gaster himself, he dubbed that one, Sol.

The other, which would've been named Lune, came out weak and unfinished. The thing wasn't a perfect vessel, a perfect sacrifice, it was a mistake. He wouldn't even talk to it.

So while Sol was shown off, pranced around, and treated as highly as the crown by monsters, beloved.

He never did say a word about Lune. No, no that one, would remain in a small cell in his laboratory, on the lowest level. He would use it to relieve his stresses, he had no wife after all and it was useless otherwise.

And eventually. The God did come, though not thr Goddess. But one was more than enough to free monster kind, breaking thr barrier.

Leaving Lune alone in the lab.

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awildweirdo101 · 1 month ago

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Just a little vent.

TW // CHILD ABUSE

So, with most people, if they have problems at all with any of their parents it's usually the father they have problems with, right? Well, why doesn't anyone talk about how mothers can be bad parents too? I mean, I'm talking speaking from personal experience, I myself have mommy issues. I have experienced things that I don't even remember. For example, here's a list of things my mother has done (I'm only mentioning the stuff that I know, and since I don't know all of what she did to my brother, I'm only going to list the stuff that I know she did to me. Alright? Alright.):

• Kidnapping me then leaving me naked on the driveway as an infant

• Failing to pay any amount of child support throughout my entire life

• Only wanting to be in contact with me once I turned 10 years old

• Not paying for my education like she promised

• Not responding to any messages about school payments

I'll probably add more later if I can think of anything or if she does something else.

#tw child abuse #tw childhood trauma #tw child neglect #tw mommy issues #tw parental issues #tw parental abuse #tw parental neglect #tw parental abandonment #tw abuse #tw vent #tw personal vent #personal vent #personal experience #trauma #tw trauma #tw neglect #tw mention of nudity #sorry for the tags #sorry for the vent

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bespectacled-bookwyrm · 1 month ago

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Whumptober 2024 - 14

Summary: Father would be back soon. He had promised, after all. And father never breaks a promise.

#Whumptober2024 #No.14 #Left for Dead #Pokemon #Fanfic #Mentioned injuries #Implied/referenced child abuse #N Harmonia #Colress #Grimsley #falsepretensesshipping #The Abandoned King AU

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louk419 · 5 months ago

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Would it surprise you to know that Richard Armitage has played the role of father or father figure no less than 21 times? Happy Father's Day to all who celebrate. 💙

#richard armitage #fathersday #June 16 2024 #honorable mentions to father figures Thorin Chop Daniel Jasko #sorry but Guy abandoned his child in the forest #this list makes no distinction between “good” and “bad”#obviously some would never win FotY awards

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ribesrubrum · 8 months ago

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under the mask of pride (fear rises as a guide)

//so i feel...honestly, a little guilty for how little i've been around as of late, especially since things are picking up drama-wise. irl debuffs aplenty will do that to you. but i wanted to get some writing out to kind of describe Carmine's mental state, so. here we are.

//fair warning: this fic is technically kind of offscreen rp in that it's at least canon that ren and carmine talked like this, though i'd greatly prefer it not be spread as a rumor or leak or something. but it also does talk about some heavy topics; namely very heavy self loathing, some mention of parental abandonment and abuse (heehoo headcanoning carmine's parents/why she's like this), mentions of bullying, self harm in the form of hair pulling/trichotillomania, and uh. ...look i'm not gonna beat around the bush, i don't wanna edgelord, i wanna treat this with respect but i also don't wanna sugarcoat it, this gets about as close to implying carmine was about to take drastic measures to alleviate her suffering as i'm comfortable with getting. the less implicit version of this warning will be in the tags. please uncollapse the tags before reading. dead dove: do not eat is in full effect here.

//this is going to be pretty heavy, and also stupid long. feel free to click if you're okay with handling that.

Carmine's listlessness has only grown as the days have worn on, she's finding. It doesn't help that her knuckles are still raw from punching her wall a day prior--she's thankful it seems like the wall fix went off without a hitch, and all she got was a rather stern talking to about making noise so late at night before the teacher that spoke with her went off. Cardigan's been sticking close to her side since Leavanny elected to stay near Kieran at least for a time, but even now, she feels pathetic for it.

Pathetic that she can't help her brother. Pathetic that she can't help her girlfriend, who simply wants to make sure that the whole club that they built together and maintained isn't destroyed because of Drayton's boneheaded move. If Carmine looked deep within herself, she'd be looking at Kiki's actions too, that he allowed this, that he's possibly setting himself up to lose everything. That Drayton's encouraging it, and she's been more on edge than ever and ready to tear someone apart for it. If she doesn't wind up punching him out when all is said and done, she's going to be very surprised.

Cardigan trills a bit from beside her, and she looks down to the flower-less Lilligant, pausing a bit as she looks down. She recognizes that trill, and knows that she's probably being concerning right now. Emotional regulation is still something that Carmine struggles with, even now, knowing that she can't and she shouldn't scream her feelings out to try and get people to understand, that yelling doesn't help, that you have to see other's perspectives. Even if sometimes, they trounce all over your own. Carmine looks down to Cardigan, giving the Lilligant a tired smile.

"...Sorry, Cardi. I know I'm probably not making your job very easy." It's soft in a way Carmine never usually is. In a way that Carmine never allows herself to be--she's all bravado and arrogance because for years, that's what kept her safe. That's what kept her and her brother safe, even if it clipped his wings and made everyone around her hesitant to approach either of them. It was safety, the thorns and briars that she metaphorically planted around herself, letting them spread where she walked and lashing them out at anyone who would even for a second think of hurting her. It was safety, it was lonely, but it was home.

...It's no wonder she likes grass types so much. The Lilligant's gaze only seems to get sadder when she says that much, gentle, leafy hands going to take one of her own as Cardigan stares up at her, as if trying to communicate something with those amber eyes that almost seem pleading. Carmine's hand trembles a bit, because once again she doesn't understand, she can't understand, why can't she--

Carmine hears footsteps, and immediately, her guard is up. She's immediately ready to go on the attack, in case anyone saw her, in case she has to defend being out for a walk in the Canyon Biome with her therapy Pokemon, something she's already received plenty of jabs about--but no. There's a familiar mop of blue hair, and that silly, dorky looking Orthworm is following them and waving with them, as Terry and Mio seem to take over where they left off. Ren's an idiot, in the bluntest of terms, but there's a sense of safety that comes with them. That they can see her, at her worst and most cruel, and laugh and let it slide off their back so easily. Because they were her age once. Her gender once, even, though that's largely irrelevant. They always seem so certain and keep their spirits so high, even if she's the only one they've trusted with some of their worries. And Carmine in turn, has trusted Ren with some of hers.

...They're about as disconnected from this entire situation as they can be, even though they met during that trip. It's as Carmine is contemplating going up to them and being a bother and just turning heel and walking away that the choice is made for her, as they turn around, start walking and see her--

"Oh! Miss Carmine, hey!"

She could walk away. She could just tell them to piss off and lash out, and destroy one of the few unconnected relationships she has with this entire mess, one of the few things that's genuinely hers. She could recede inside herself, lock herself away like she did after she reached her breaking point, when she nearly...

"Hey, Ren. Finally getting your nose out of those cameras?"

The barb is light, half-hearted at best, and could probably make someone deeply passionate a little upset at being teased. And yet Ren takes it in stride, laughing easily as they walk up, Lulu going to Cardigan and just kind of talking with the Lilligant for a moment. "You know it, girlie! Arc, all of these worms are doin' so well, they ain't overwhelmin' the environment nor gettin' overwhelmed themselves--everything's so perfect right now, it's really amazing! Ohh, I gotta tell you about some of the babies, they're just--"

For a brief moment, Carmine thinks she can just get away with Ren going on a hyperfixation ramble and forgetting her own worries in favor of focusing on the things her rival has accomplished. Because it is quite the accomplishment, even if Carmine's definitely harped on them for trying to downplay it before. But their gaze goes to Cardigan and Lulu, falling quickly and their words fading off as Carmine looks, and now everyone looks concerned.

Carmine's posture tightens as she realizes she can't get away with this so easily. She feels their gaze dart back to her, and she's already sure her expression is stormy, and...

"...I think that's enough about me." Fuck. Their voice has softened considerably, and she knows she's done for. "Miss Carmine, are you--"

"I'm fine, Ren." It comes out too sharp, too defensive, and there's a brief moment where she's hoping Ren will just walk away at that. She's shaking, she knows she is, and her gaze averts a bit only to feel not just Cardigan, but Lulu--that stupid, brainless worm--take her hands, wrapping them both in leaves and tendrils, and it feels disgusting and bitter and she wants to run and hide, she wants to tear her hands away--

"...Miss Carmine." Ren's voice sounds so soft, so...sad for a moment, and there's a pause as more footsteps can be heard--Carmine doesn't even bother to flinch, but she feels a tug on both of her hands as she opens her eyes, seeing Ren nod at both Pokemon before looking to her with a smile that's both soft and sad.

"Come on, Miss Carmine. Let's go somewhere else to talk, okay?"

---------------------------------------------

The trip back to her room is arduous, even though it barely takes more than fifteen minutes. Every agonizing second feels like a walk of shame, but she realizes something along the way. It's only so long because Ren knows their way around here like the back of their hand now; they know where people aren't, because they aren't some social butterfly who likes to help in every club. They take her through an easy but arduous path that leaves her alone in her head, and it takes a couple of second after Ren's stopped for her to stop too.

"...You must have a lot on yer mind to be makin' mistakes like this, Miss Carmine." Ren's voice is soft, non-judgemental, and they don't even flinch when she turns back to face them with something of a severe expression. It's the kind of care and kindness she doesn't deserve, she's sure, but as she unlocks the door to her room and ushers Ren and their Pokemon inside, it's something she finds herself internally thankful for.

Carmine's room is a mess, perhaps moreso than usual. Stress eating will do that, bags of chips and other sweet and savory alike strewn about. Cardigan doesn't even seem surprised, but Lulu, bless his stupid little soul, seems taken aback by it as he draws himself inside. She hears Ren's footsteps as they close the door behind them, a small sound escaping them as they walk in front of Carmine.

"You want some help cleanin' off that bed of yours?" Carmine looks over at her messy, disheveled bed, and it's many snacks and wrappers as well. It's an absolute Tepigsty, more than she'd ever allow anyone to see. She feels herself listlessly nod her head as she looks over to Ren, who's concern hasn't dampened even an inch as they move to help in an instant. She's thankful she's got a vacuum and that it's early enough in the afternoon that nobody's likely around the dorms; Cardigan and Lulu both assist as well as they help clear it off, at least enough to let Carmine sit down on it once they're all done.

Cardigan hops on the bed with Carmine as she sits down, and Lulu rests his head near Ren's feet as he gets himself comfortable on the floor, and Ren looks to her, finally broaching the topic, "Ya look like you got a lot on yer mind, Miss Carmine. You sure everything's okay?"

It takes Carmine a lot longer than she'd like to respond. Cardigan gently takes hold of one of Carmine's hands, gently petting it with her own leafy appendage. The eventual response she settles on is a bitter laugh.

"...I don't know." It comes out so soft and uncertain, it feels like she's a different person entirely when she says it. "I thought everything was fine. I thought...I don't know, I thought that everything would be okay. I really let myself believe that now that I made up with my brother, that everything would go back to some sort of normal, but..."

Carmine's voice pitches higher and higher with every word, and she finds herself shaking a bit. She can't even look at her rival right now, how pathetic can she even get?

"Oh, Carmine..." There's not even that weirdly respectful 'Miss' at the beginning of her name, and a part of her hates that, that she's being seen as sympathetic for even a moment when she doesn't deserve it, she doesn't deserve this, if she'd just trusted Kiki-- "Nothin' is ever that easy, but I remember how relieved ya were when Kiki actually bothered to respond."

"Yeah." Carmine confirms that much, listlessly, but a ghost of a smile traces her face. "...It really filled me with hope, for a second. That maybe things could go back to some sort of normal, that I could really see Kiki for all he is. It wanted to be seen and come into it's own, and I...I didn't know how to do that, but..."

"...But you wanted to try." Ren's words softly intervene. Carmine nods shortly after.

"I wanted to try. I still do. But it's...that big fight happened, and now everything's just...it feels like we're right back where we started."

Carmine's voice breaks a little bit, and try as she might to rein it in, it's harder to get back on track. At this point, she feels, she might as well just give up.

"...I don't know what to do."

Carmine's gaze stays down, because she can't look at Ren, she can't, she just can't. But Ren's words; soft, steady words, a contrast to the cold steel they loved so dearly, pour out none the less.

"...It's a tough position to be in, Carmine. Ya got your brother and it's undyin' need to win on one side, and ya got Miss Amarys tryin' her damnedest to hold everyone together on the other, yeah?"

"Yeah. And it's like--I don't want to destroy the relationship I have with my brother. I want to rebuild it, to let it come into it's own. But I...my beloved is right, even if I worry about saying it. She tries so hard to uphold the rules of the club, of this school, and these--these jerks keep sending her horrible, disgusting things for it. And for what?"

A quiet settles over the room, and she's sure Ren expects her to elaborate, but she doesn't. Not even she knows what, and she's sure Ren gets it by the time they speak up next.

"...I ain't gonna go makin' any assumptions, but...I don't even think I know the answer to that, Carmine."

It's soft, when Ren admits it. Sad, even. She can only imagine what their face is doing right now, and it gets Carmine to laugh a bit. Bitterly, wretchedly.

"Neither do--neither do I, Ren. And do you know how much that kills me?"

Carmine's voice pitch rises, and she feels her free hand drawing into her hair, Cardigan's trills of concern becoming more apparent as she tries to hop over and dislodge it--

"I love Kiki! I love Amarys! I love them both more than life itself and I--if I say anything at all, I'm going to hurt one of them. Both of them, even, maybe, whether I intend it or not! And the little Mandibuzzes on here, flying around and trying to hurt everyone in this school, they'll be on it in an instant, they'll--they'll hurt them both, they'll turn them both against each other, and I--if I do anything, they already know it's my fault from the start, that all of this is, that I was stupid and boneheaded and lied to my brother because I was scared it could've gotten hurt--"

"Miss Carmine."

"--and I told Juliana to lie, yes, I got so worried that Kiki would just get so excited and that Ogerpon could've hurt or done something worse to it, but then my grandfather told me to keep my mouth shut about helping Ogerpon and I--I didn't--"

"Miss Carmine."

"--And then it--it stole her mask, and I've never been more angry in my life at it, and it just--it keeps stomping on others feelings, and it won't believe anyone, and I don't know what I can actually do--"

"Miss Carmine, please--!"

"WHAT?! WHAT DO YOU WANT?!"

Carmine's shriek practically causes her to lunge at her friend, the firm tone in that moment making her see someone else. Wide yellow eyes fiercely stare at bright blue ones, as Ren startles a bit at the ferocity in her tone. The quiet over the room is tense and uneasy, and Ren already sees a few strands got torn out because of it. They take a gentle breath in as realization hits Carmine, but she's still for a moment. Still as Cardigan trills with concern, as Lulu looks up with even more concern on his dopey little face, though he looks ready to hold Carmine back more than anything.

Ren's surprisingly quick on the uptake, at least, and they speak up again before Carmine can.

"Isn't that somethin' you should be askin' of yourself?"

Ren's words are confusing, and the confusion must be apparent on her face as they reach her ears. Ren gently breathes, and continues, "I mean it. You've been talkin' this entire time about Kiki this, Amarys that, and I ain't gonna disparage you for that. Sure puts any rumors of ya bein' self centered to bed, not that I believed 'em anyway. But..."

"What is it that ya want, at the end of it all? Isn't that a question that's come up even once for ya...?"

Carmine can't even believe what she's hearing.

"Why does that matter? I've taken what I wanted for years, I--"

"Okay, you hold on a second here." Ren's words are still soft, but there's a firmness to them now that cuts through her words like butter. "When did that stop bein' a question you asked yerself?"

"It doesn't matter--"

"It absolutely does matter? Girl, yer gettin' tugged in two different directions and ya sound like yer long past the end of yer rope."

"Why does it matter when I've been nothing but a selfish bitch this entire time?!"

And that startles Ren enough to actually get them to stop for a second, completely taken aback. Carmine's gaze goes downward, and she's shaking, horribly.

"Those anons were right, okay?! I ruined Kiki's one good friendship because I'm a bonehead, I'm a failure of a girlfriend who can't even help the girl I love so much with her anger and problems other than just being there like a useless cardboard cutout, I deserve this, all of it, even all of the hateful words and it would've just been so much easier if I had--"

Something stops Carmine in her tracks from speaking. Multiple of them, really. Cardigan's hands, for starters, wrapped firmly around one of her own hands; two of Lulu's tendrils wrap around the other, and even Carmine has to admit that she's surprised by how little an Orthworm's head seems to weigh as he rests his head on one of her legs with concern.

The final thing, that she didn't even hear, is Ren getting up and putting a firm, supportive hand on her shoulder, tiny as said hand is. When she actually gets a look at their face, they look like they're about to cry, and for a brief moment she wonders if she's just gone and ruined another friendship.

"Don't--don't you dare talk about yerself like that again, you hear me?"

Oh. That's not what she expected at all; Ren's voice practically trembles as they say that, and it hits something in her. Carmine's eyes well up with tears of her own, and she can practically hear herself sniffling.

"...I'm sorry, Ren." Her voice is so soft, so delicate, so fragile in the moment that she wonders if it's her own. "I'm...I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm..."

"I know you are." Ren's voice softens from that point on, and their grip becomes a little easier. A little more slack, but still there. "When did ya stop seein' yerself as someone not worth considerin' the feelin's of, girl...?"

"...I don't know. It was...before that. Maybe when Amarys and Kiki fought that one time. I--I don't know." Carmine's voice is shaky as she struggles to keep herself together, and she feels Cardigan shift and pull her arm into a hug, and the tears start pouring down at that. She can't stop them, even if she's not a sobbing wreck with no dignity. Yet, at least. "...I don't want to lose anything else."

That gets a pause from Ren, who does their best to calm themself down. "Anything else...?"

"...My parents are divorced. My dad was...he was awful. Just a screaming, bumbling oaf who went from job to job while my mom stayed home and took care of us. Though she was...she was way more focused on Kiki..."

Ren listens carefully, nodding their head as Carmine continues.

"I haven't seen either of them in...years. We usually live with our grandparents, when we're not here. Last time I saw my mom, we got into an argument. I asked her why she stopped caring for me. Why she just...tried to leave me with him--"

"...She what?"

Carmine spares a quick glance at Ren's face, when they say that--practically seething with an anger they don't usually express. "...Yeah. She--she said she could only handle one of us, and that I was Dad's favorite, so..."

"Girl." Ren's doing their best to keep their tone level, but the anger doesn't leave. Hell, if anything, it mixes with the sheer unholy audacity of what they heard, leaving them flabberghasted-- "What the fuck is wrong with your mom?"

Carmine laughs, and while it sounds bitter, there's almost some mirth to it. "Yeah. Like I said. We got into an argument last time I talked to her. I told her I wanted an apology for her trying to abandon me, before Dad went and ran away. I...haven't spoken to her since."

"Carmine...what the fuck, that's so..."

A silence hangs over the room as Ren trails off, but Carmine breaks the silence after a few moments.

"...Between this, and the rest of the shit I dealt with at school...I...I didn't want Kiki to turn out like me." Carmine sniffles, tears still coming unbidden. "I thought you had to be tough and mean to make it, but I just...I wanted Kiki to grow up happy. I wanted it to have a better life than me. I was this bitter, mean girl, but I thought I could at least make it so my little brother--it'd have a chance at growing up to be a gentle hearted little dork who had something happy in it's life. But all I did...it all just amounted to...to..."

There's a few seconds more of sniffling before the dam finally breaks, and Carmine just starts to sob without an end. She's pretty sure her makeup is running down her face, if it hasn't been already; she finally just breaks, her tears pouring and pouring down as she sobs wretchedly and loudly, her hands finally being relinquished so she can try, in vain, to wipe those tears off. But still they come; the pain of so much more than a simple inciting incident, but still mostly that.

Ren uses their own free hand to wipe away the tears falling from their own eyes, as they just let her for a bit.

"...I want to stop hurting." Carmine speaks up, and Ren starts for a moment as they listen. "I want to stop feeling like the evil person that everyone thinks I am. But what if I'm just born evil, and there's no changing that...?"

"That's--" Ren speaks up, briefly, but Carmine speaks again and they let her get it out of her system.

"I want to make things better. I want to just know if it's all my fault, I want to know if I'm just--if I'm justified, in being unable to forgive Kiki for some of the stuff it did." Carmine sniffles again, wretched sobs still escaping her. "...I want to be able to be happy again, without feeling like I'm walking on eggshells. I want to make my girlfriend's pain go away--I want to make Kiki's pain go away, and fuck, maybe even Atlas' and some of the others. I want the world to just stop for a bit, at least so I can stop aching like this. I...I think I just want, more than anything, for someone to tell me I've suffered enough for this, or at the very least, that I just haven't grown up to become a little clone of Dad."

"...Is that so much to ask?"

The question is soft, full of despair, but it at least feels...somewhat good, to try and dislodge some of the thorns in her. It's painful and it feels dizzying, but Ren's hand remains steady, even if their own tears come down hard.

"...You're a teenager. A teenager shouldn't--you shouldn't ever have to ask that kind of shit of yourself." Ren's words are soft, with an empathy forged in the same shit they went through. Just without a depressive spiral and a shut-in phase. "You deserve to be happy, Carmine. You made a dumb, boneheaded mistake, but that doesn't mean you're evil. And it sure as fuck don't mean that you've gone and become your Dad."

Carmine pauses a bit, her sobs coming slower as she tries to listen.

"None of that shit yer askin' about, none of it's too much. But how's anyone else gonna be happy--how can ya share happiness with others if ya ain't gettin' happiness for yerself, y'know?"

"Because ya do deserve it. Whether ya want to admit it or not. Yer not evil, yer not your dad, you're literally a confused sixteen year old girl who should've never been made to feel like that."

It's shocking to hear, really. All of it is. Ren says it with so much conviction that Carmine almost believes it.

"...I don't want to talk anymore. I...I think I just want to...cry..."

"...Cry as much as you need, girl. I'll be here as long as you need."

"Don't--don't tell anyone about this, Ren. Please. Everyone has enough to worry about, and I...I don't want to put more on them. Please, I already feel bad enough burdening you..."

Ren manages something of a soft, warm chuckle at that. "...No worries, girl. What we talked about is stayin' in here, I swear on my life."

"...Thank you, Ren."

Carmine cries herself out eventually; by the time she's done, the two of them have shifted from the bed to the floor, bringing Carmine's mattress down to floor level so they could distract themselves until Carmine fell asleep. It's no easy fix, listening to a friend, but...if it makes the burden lighter, then Ren has no problem with it.

They were in a similar place many years ago with no one to help them, after all. It's the least they can do.

#carmine talks #pokemon irl #pkmn irl #pokeblogging #rotomblr #long post #pokeirl fanfic #drama stakes pokereality #cw suicidal ideation #cw self harm #cw abusive parents #cw emotional abuse #cw bullying #cw mention of attempted child abandonment #cw child abandonment #ask to tag #//that SHOULD encompass everything #//but if i have missed anything at all. please let me know and i will tag #//this is a long and very difficult ride i worked very hard on

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