#charlie's random prizes

[welcome-to-roomba-fazbender]

Random Christmas Prize Time! 6

“Damn getting real close to christmas now! i hope i get plenty of shoes to eat ha jokes on you i’ll be stealing your shoes after santa gets done delivering gifts”

“First person to send me the code *wow* Thru an ask will win a baby walrus with a rude hat! this post will be updated once the winner appears!”

“the winner will be @’d and their prize will be added to the post as well”

congratulations to @cameraclown06 ((for some reason tumblr won’t let me @ you but okay then))

[diordeer]

౨ৎ HOW YOU GET THE GIRL PT.2

“remind me how it used to be, pictures in frames of kisses on cheeks… and say you want me” - taylor swift (smau)

contains: charlie bushnell x fem!reader (part 1 here)

description: i just watched an edward scissorhands ballet and its made me reminiscent of my dance days… why did angsty teen me quit!!

Liked by iamcharliebushnell, dior.n.goodjohn and others

yn.ln last little photo dump, with taylor stealing my phone and taking a selfie which is something i never thought would happen?!

tagged iamcharliebushnell, taylorswift

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user1 charlies been REAL quiet since the comment

↳ user2 I dont think its awkward between them bc otherwise she wouldnt be posting them together

dior.n.goodjohn imagine having THE TAYLOR SWIFT hijack ur phone

↳ yn.ln ikr like i mean she can keep it if she wants idm 🤷‍♀️

user3 me trying to figure out if the post is from the mv or behind the scenes

↳ user4 yeeah like it IS a scene but from a phone camera… and they r pretty close

user13 HE WANTS U FOR WORSE OR FOR BETTER!!!!

user5 well, she isnt fighting the dating allegations is she

↳ user6 why would she have to?

taylorswift 😘😘😘

user7 R THEY TOGETHER??!!

↳ user8 i dont think so, just rly close

user9 why is it the end of the photo dumps 😃

↳ user10 probs bc thats all the photos she has from it 🙄

user11 ok NOW get her cast on percy jackson

user12 they better be dating or im going to kms

Direct Messages:

You: Heyy charlie, what was that comment about that walker sent?

Charlie: Ohh did u see that?

You: Yeah sorryyyy!

Charlie: No dont be sorry, it was just walker yk? he goes on about random stuff to annoy people a bit

Yn: So.. its not true?

Charlie: I think it was just a joke 😄

Yn: Oh okayy! Sorry! Are we still on for the weekend then? Maybe we can chat ab it

Charlie: Of course!!!! … whats there to talk about tho?

Liked by taylorswift, iamcharliebushnell and others

yn.ln we in fact had A LOT to talk about

tagged iamcharliebushnell

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user5 why do i feel like we missed a chapter

dior.n.goodjohn if i had to sit through one more session of you two yearning for eachover i might have gone crazy

↳ user6 why can i envision this perfectly

user1 talk about, or kiss about?

↳ yn.ln WOWOWOW

user2 HE GOT THE GIRL!!

walker.scobell i take full credit for this

↳ user4 everyone say thank u to walker!

↳ user3 thank u walker 🙏

↳ iamcharliebushnell thank you walker

↳ yn.ln aint no way charlie, u were in so much denial about his comment its embarassing

↳ iamcharliebushnell 😣😣😣

leahsavajeffries FINALLY!!!

user7 OMGOMGOMG

taylorswift i feel like im a matchmaker rn

↳ yn.ln you are, and a very good one at that

user8 ON VALENTINES DAY TOO? SOMEONE GRAB ME A GUN RN

user9 jokes aside her hairband is super cute

↳ yn.ln its my prized possession, i will wear it any chance i get

Liked by taylorswift, dior.n.goodjohn and others

yn.ln omgomg, still in awe that our how you get the girl music video won an AWARD?! It was all u taylor boo 🩷🩷

tagged iamcharliebushnell, taylorswift

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user1 THE OUTFITS? THE HAIR? THEY ALL ATE SO HARD THERES NOT EVEN A KITCHEN ANYMORE

taylorswift all ME?! u ARE how u get the girl

↳ yn.ln STOP THIS MADNESS

↳ iamcharliebushnell what about mee?? 😣

↳ yn.ln oh! 😄 well ur a guy so…

↳ user3 me he heee

↳ user4 yns so real

sabrinacarpenter ahh congrats!! So well deserved!! 🎉🎉

user2 i cant believe this is real, yn, taylor, and charlie ?!?!

dior.n.goodjohn I WAS ROOTING FOR U!!

↳ iamcharliebushnell I WOULD HOPE SO?!

user5 charlie got the girl and got the award !

↳ user6 that was so cringey

user7 yn and taylor are my new fav duo

gracieabrams YESS!! WELL DONE 🥳🥳

taglist: @highfidelities @lostinhisworld @lizziesfirstwife @auttumnsayshi @silkenthusiasts @taygrls @kidkrowk @kanojous @niktwazny303 @m00ng4z3r

[sciencebecameouraddiction]

my lucifer headcanons

note: these are just my own head canons. things i’ve noticed, how i write lucifer, what plays into why i write luce the way i do… etc. purely my own opinion.

- i think michael was very fond of his brother

- when the time came though to listen to dad and fulfill his duty or be a brother to lucifer michael chose duty

- the betrayal is still a sore spot for lucifer

- during lucifer’s “youth” he was curious, always dreaming up incredible creations… it was why he was dads favorite.

- he made the star fish, “because the sea deserves its own stars!” and he also made the duck. the ducks first iteration was quite a bit larger… lucifer and god compromised on a smaller duck. (more like god bribed lucifer.)

- he watched adam be made…. so he was always fond of him and lilith… until he fell in love with lilith…

- he didn’t realize it was love

- but michael knew and michael was scared. so he would draw lucifer away from the garden every chance he got

- lucifer was very naive when he was cast down to hell. he knew so much, he had been alive for so long, but there was so much life experience he didn’t have.

- the first few years in hell were horrible…

- he had hope at first

- maybe it all wouldn’t be so bad

- it was really bad. like really bad. the people who came down to hell were unspeakable devils

- (this is based off a fic i read and i can’t find it, if this rings any bells pls let me know the fic name) but lucifer is continuously appalled and distraught by the atrocities committed in his name.

- it’s one of the reasons he so powerful. he has the angelic power but also the power from those who worship him and make sacrifices for him

he really hates it. a lot. makes him feel no better than the worse overlord (cough alastor cough)

- charlie has no idea and she’ll never know if he can help it

- lucifer smells like apples and vanilla musk, a hint of cinnamon and something floral or citrusy.

- the floral or citrus changes depending on his mood

- he has a huge library. he actually pops up to earth with Asmodeous sometimes and takes books.

- he saved the whole Library of Alexandria’s books before it burned down

- he’s great friends with all the sins

- arguably closest with Beelzebub and Asmodeous

- he loves claw machines. the lights, the sounds, the prize winning???? he’s so fucking happy

- he actually wears glasses to read. he doesn’t need them but he says they make him look smarter.

- is actually a pretty good leader, is not nearly as forgiving as charlie is, but he’s not inherently cruel

- his third favorite color is pink

- his first and second are yellow and red, obviously

- he has expensive ass, maximalist taste.

- he doesn’t use tech because he knows what vox does to said tech.

- he’s always wanted a dog

- he’s very touchy. shows love physically. is only this way if he likes you though

- he has nightmares almost every night

- coffee addict

- because after not sleeping he wakes up looking like death warmed over

- and that’s if he didn’t forget to eat the past few days except for random snacks and didn’t do a 48 hour blitz of staying up working on ducks or the bit of kingdom shit he does.

- he has a handful of servants who he trusts and they are the only one in the house. there’s no team. nothing like that. he keeps it very close

- this was after someone who was a servant tried to throw an angelic dagger at his head because really they wanted to kill him and thought working for him would get them close enough.

- he homeschooled charlie. he knows a lot of stuff and even knew the guy who created calculus!

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

inspired by @alastcrs's chaggie comic, a sequel of sorts XD

Vaggie: "Sweetie, tell me you didn't give Sir Pentious dating advice."

Charlie: "No? I didn't?"

Vaggie: "Then babe what did you do?"

Charlie: "I just showed you off a little~"

Vaggie: (groaning) "The picture thing? The, have you seen my girlfriend joke? Again?"

Charlie: "Yep! Why?"

Vaggie: "We have to go save Pentious from Cherri Bomb."

Charlie: "Why would we need to- oh no. Oh, noooo-"

Vaggie: "Oh fucking yes."

-elsewhere and in danger-

Sir Pentious: (at random sinner) "Have you sssseen Miss Cherri Bomb~? Ssshe-"

Cherri Bomb: "DUDE WHATE THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?"

Sir Pentious: "-ah, I am, apprecsssiating you-?"

Cherri Bomb: "BY HELPING THE BOUNTRY HUNTERS FIND ME???"

Sir Pentious: "What- no! No I only, I wassss merely-"

Cherri Bomb: "THAT'S MY WANTED POSTER, DICK HEAD!"

Sir Pentious: "Well. Ah. Yesss."

Cherri Bomb: "GIVE IT HERE SO I CAN BURN IT"

Sir Pentious: (clutching wanted poster to chest) "Pleassse Cherri, noooo! It issssss, the only quality photo of you that I possessss-!"

Cherri Bomb: "Then just ASK me for another one like a normal person! Or stalk me like a normal creep! ANYTHING THAT DOESN'T END WITH WITH ME STUFFED AND MOUNTED ON SOME OVERLORD'S FUCKING WALL!!! Like, fuck- do you KNOW how much important shit I've blown up???"

Sir Pentious: "Oh yessss! You are very accomplissshed!" (beaming) "The weaponsss casssche last from year was essspecssially beautiful! All thossse, ssssecondary explosionssss...~"

Cherri Bomb: "YOU'RE gonna be a secondary explosion if you don't hand that poster over Right Now."

Sir Pentious: "Erm, before I do ssso... might I humbly requessst a replasscement photo of-"

Cherri Bomb: "No." (lights fuse) "Let go or go sky high with it."

Sir Pentious: "AH-!"

Charlie: (running) "Pen!" (skids to stop and grabs vaggie) "Holy shit that's a bomb- PEN JUST LET IT GO!!!"

Vaggie: "Pentious drop and take cover! It's not worth it!"

Sir Pentious: "But- sssshe ISSS worth-"

Cherri Bomb: "Bye bitch." (tosses bomb) (Runs)

Sir Pentious: "Ah, ssh-"

KABLOOMY

Vaggie: "...."

Charlie: "......"

Vaggie: "...we're gonna add self-worth sessions and healthy relationship boundary workshops to the hotel activities list, yeah?"

Charlie: "Oh yes. Definitely."

(splat) (splatter) (Splotch)

Charlie: "After, um, after Pen's collected himself a bit."

Vaggie: "Yeah... Maybe hold back on the 'i love my girlfriend' jokes around him too?"

Charlie: "....I'll." (pained grimace) "Try."

Vaggie: "All I ask, babe." (smooches her cheek) "C'mon. Let's gather up our snake man and head home."

Charlie: (sighs) "It would've worked if he'd just had a better picture-"

Vaggie: "Charlie."

Charlie: "They're cute together! He's all over her- it's adorable!"

Vaggie: "He's all over the street right now."

Charlie: "She used one of her better bombs on him this time." (picks up an arm and part of pentious's tail) "That has to mean something, right??"

Vaggie: "More work for us."

Charlie: "Hmm~ I bet you they kiss before the next extermination~"

Vaggie: "Sweetie." (grabs other arm and the torso) "If they kiss before one of them DIES I'll count it as your win."

Charlie: "No other time limit?"

Vaggie: "None."

Charlie: "And the prize if I win...?"

Vaggie: "Extra kisses. And I'll join your Cherri x Pentious group chat."

Charlie: "DEAL!"

Vaggie & Charlie: (shake pentious's hands over it)

-one kiss and death later-

>user (SpearOfSappho) has joined group BOMBSIRWAY FOREVR!!!

SpearOfSappho: hey

cute'n'cuddlycapricorn: ;-;

SpearOfSappho: charlie im so sorry

SpearOfSappho: would the extra kisses help?

cute'n'cuddlycapricorn: ! THEY KISSED AND NO ONE EVEN TOOK ANY PICS OF IT!!!!

SpearOfSappho: oh

cute'n'cuddlycapricorn: ANGEL x DEMON EMEMIES TO FRIENDS TO LOVERS SLOW BURN STAR CROSSED ROMANCE 100k LETS FUCKING GOOOOO!!!!!!!!

[realshadow01-blog]

*Pop* just like a candy apple! {Platonic Radioapple!}

Introduction

|| Hello! I just wanted to say hello again as I've been gone for almost two years, I think. :3 I wanted to start writing again, for some reason, and it's 2:43am. I am not sure if I would post this or not, depends if I feel like it.||

|| Sorry for the absence, and if any characters are ooc (out of character) too! I have watched all of season 1 - but I can't capture the characters personalities that well. And sorry if my grammar or wording is bad, I don't know that much English as I thought. ||

|| This is a tickle drabble/short fan fiction post, and I don't expect any - but I will be taking requests for drabbles and headcannons! ||

>> || Summary for introduction: I do not know much English, I haven't captured the characters that well, this is a tickle-based, short fan fiction and I'm sorry for my (almost) two year absence. And, I am taking requests for drabbles and headcannons (no art or fics :<) || <<

|| Warnings (I guess!): Tickles, Swearing ||

---

So, the Demon is back again! Back again with a new sense of humor and a new ruthless torturing method. The Radio Demon is back! He's returned, what does it mean for a certain rival? Or a few?~ The future will decide...~

It was a surprisingly quiet day in the Hazbin Hotel. Everyone was either out celebrating or having a full day in bed after they defeated the Angels. People were bummed out, injured and flat-out exhausted.

Lucifer decided to stay at the Hotel for a while, or at least visit often, and he was watching TV in the common room as he held his most prized rubber duck. Charlie was out with Vaggie, Angel and Husk were out too and pretty much the only people in the hotel were Niffty, Alastor and Lucifer.

Alastor was nowhere to be found, I mean, where would you expect an unpredictable being like him to be?

Nifty was off cleaning.

You already heard about Lucifer.

That changed when Alastor's shadow crawled around the floors of the hotel, until he emerged from thin air. His grin was as sinister and menacing as always, although something was off. It looked slightly strained. He was preciously annoyed by another Overlord, but we won't get into that, but it could be why... He then went to go find Lucifer, for some reason.

Lucifer was throwing his rubber duck against the wall and catching it like a ball, abandoning the television so all it became was simple background noise. He continued to throw the rubber duck until it hit Alastor in the face.

“Oops....” Lucifer giggled mockingly, not in the slightest sorry, but decided to apologize anyway to make matters better for him, if they were becoming bad. Although, Alastor, in return, grabbed the rubber duck and crushed it in his bare hand, sensing Lucifer's infuriated pity, despite Lucifer showing no emotion whatsoever. “Was that necessary, Alastor?”

“No,” Alastor's grin grew as he threw the shriveled rubber duck aside, his radio filter still as strong as ever, “but I wanted to. Doesn't that seem fair?~”

Lucifer groaned, annoyed. “What kind of shitty question is that!?”

“A reasonable question that needs answering.”

“Well, I won't fuckin’ answer!”

“...”

“As you wish.” Alastor's grin grew, but still looked a little strained.

Lucifer, funny enough, saw his strained grin and smirked.

“Is the demon cracking at something?~ Are you pissy about your wound from Adam?~” Lucifer retorted, giggling, which absolutely broke Alastor's patience and before either of them knew it, Alastor had thrown himself at Lucifer and pinned him to the floor, scribbling his claws into Lucifer's sensitive, tender sides, earning a surprised squeal and a string of squeaky laughter. “EEK!!~ FUHUHUHUCK!!- ALAHAHASTOR!!??”

Alastor had just smirked, moving his hands to random spots to keep the short king occupied, sneakily slithering his tendrils to Lucifer and restraining him swiftly as the tips of the tendrils restraining him tickled into the crooks of his wings - the 'wings pits' if you will. No matter what they're called, they sent Lucifer into hysteria.

Lucifer's screaming, wheezing and frantic laughter could be heard basically throughout the whole of Hell from how loud it was. Alastor only had the slightest issues with that, so he closed some doors to prevent people from coming in, if they did try. “ALAHAHAHASTOR- WHEHEHEN IHI CAHAHATCH YOUHUHU ALAHAHASTOR!!- GAHAHAHA!!?”

That wasn't the worst of it, oh boy...

The main reason the phrase “Lucifer's screaming, wheezing and frantic laughter could be heard basically throughout the whole of Hell” was used because it was the truth. Not only was his laughter loud, but Alastor had been devilish enough to broadcast his laughter live! :)

“Go on, Lucifer,” *Alastor smiled menacingly, voice hushed, “Make the microphone pop like a candy apple...~” He teased, leaving him to face the torture and humiliation for a bit.

---

hope this was good!! sorry if it was short, i was pondering over a draft from a year ago and I haven't written a fan fiction in a hot minute >.<

{This MIGHT have some more parts!!!}

[blakenation1]

Dead Poets Society @ an orientation?!?!

I have my college orientation tomorrow and I'm so nervous it's not even funny. So! To cope I am thinking "What would the Dead Poets Society do?" Under the cut 🤔

Cameron is trying to be as productive as he can. He's going to every tent, asking every question that comes to mind, scheduling meetings with advisors that he probably doesn't even need, he's making as many friends as he can. Taking orientation serious AF.

Knox is so nervous bless his heart. He shows up to orientation prepared though. I can see him now (if it's a college orientation) with his little like casual outfit on, backpack on with whatever he will need in it, distressed look on his face, hands gripping his backpack straps like his backpack is gonna grow legs and run away. HELP HIM!!! He ends up having a good time and making a lot of friends though.

Neil is excited, literally calm down bby. He shows up and is talking to anyone and everyone. "Hey! I like your scarf! You know- I had this friend one time and he had this scarf-" literally him. I need Neil to come up to me and strike up a conversation with me at orientation. Please I'm so scared.

Charlie is having a blast, social anxiety is scared of him (and Neil, obvi). Probably flirting with some folks, I get it Charlie, lots of college folks are very pretty. Honestly, a lot like Neil. Running around making friends, getting to know campus life and all that jazz. Falls asleep during presentations been there done that.

Meeks is LOVING the campus landmarks, "oh look theres the [insert mascot here] statue. Did you know in 1932-" literally knows all kinds of random facts about whatever university he's going to. Talks it up big time with other people in his major study. "yeah back in school me and my friend made this radio and-" blah blah blah lots of smarty pants language. Im my mind, Pitts and Meeks ended up going to the same school i wish and they'd have lots of fun together. Eating lunch together, pointing out fun little things, "oh look at that funny looking car!" etc.

Pitts is nervous when he first gets there, but he ends up loosening up and maybe even trying a few new things. If they had games or something, I know he would really enjoy that. "Meeks, look! They're having a scavenger hunt, I'm gonna go win >:)" Yay for Pittsie, he had a lot of fun and maybe even brought home some prizes or something.

Todd is very nervous, maybe ready to go home, feeling overstimulated. I get it Todd, I get it. Why I'm bringing fidgets tomorrow so I have something to keep my hands busy. Anyway, Todd, majoring in English, ends up chatting with the poetry club, and maybe even a few new clubs, seeing what's around. After talking casually with a few other people in his major, I can see him feeling a lot better, and becoming more lively, now that he knows a few people.

Yay for Dead Poets Society!! Surviving orientation!! This is so niche but I feel less nervous I reckon!!

[radiaurapple]

Lucid Dreams of New Orleans: Chapter 12

CHAPTER SUMMARY: IN WHICH Alastor finally learns the truth.

FIC SUMMARY: Lucifer has always kept his distance from sinners. It’s what keeps him (relatively) sane — if he gets too close, he is haunted by visions of the tragic mortal lives that landed them in Hell. But in his new life at the Hotel, it is more difficult than ever to stay away — and when it comes to light that his daughter’s insufferable facilities manager is gravely wounded, it falls to Lucifer to deliver his soul from Death. In so doing, he falls headfirst into the sins, past lives, and heartbreaks of the one human whose contradictions he is powerless to resist.

it's saturday so it's new chapter time!!! I went outside of my comfort zone for the art this time (with mixed results) but i really wanted to capture this moment this chapter!! ALSO we have a teeny lil discord server now for brain rot related to the fic so feel free to join in!

[AO3 LINK]

Chapter preview below!

Humanity has conceived of many delightful inventions over the eons. Lucifer could spend ages listing his favorites: the printing press, engines, soda, aqueducts, cereal with little prizes inside. But of all the surprises over the years, he’s pretty sure nothing tops electricity. 

The manipulation of electromagnetic fields has always been second-nature to Lucifer — he just never got the point. He was fine with living in a Hell lit by flames. Then humans discovered electricity, and Lucifer was blown away by all the potential they saw in it. Their little contraptions won Lucifer over immediately; over the years, he’s created hundreds of generators to support Hell’s burgeoning electrical grid. 

Which is to say that making a generator for the hotel is second-nature to him, even though he’s exhausted and the work involves a bunch of fiddly little parts. He’s only been at it for an hour and he’s already made good progress, working half in the hotel and half in the palace workshop, thanks to the portal he’s opened in the center of both rooms. He leaves it open so he’ll be able to hear if Alastor or Charlie come by while he’s in the palace, or if something implodes while he’s in the hotel — a very real possibility as he’s currently got the vacuum pump depressurizing the generator’s antimatter chamber. 

He gets up from his workbench in the hotel, trips on an empty wire roll, and stumbles through the portal into his workshop in search of motor oil. All of Lucifer’s creation stuff is piled at random on the floor-to-ceiling shelves that line the far wall of his workshop; he unfolds his wings and flits up to rifle through the bottles on the top shelf. 

“Lucifer?” 

It’s Alastor. 

“In here,” Lucifer says.

Alastor pokes his head through the portal just as Lucifer sticks his hand in something slippery and mysterious — he jerks his hand back and an assortment of solvents topple off the shelf and splatter on the floor. Alastor laughs; Lucifer scowls over his shoulder. “Not a word.” 

“What an utter mess,” Alastor says pleasantly. 

“Right,” Lucifer says dryly. He flaps his wings and alights on a table in front of Alastor. “Do you need something?” 

Alastor steps through the portal with a mug in his hands. He isn’t smiling — is this how it’s going to be from now on? Has Alastor decided he no longer needs to smile when they’re alone?

“I’ve brought more coffee,” Alastor says. “Though I’m not sure you should accept it in your present state.” He glances pointedly at Lucifer’s hand. 

Lucifer glances down — his fingers are dripping something thick and blue onto the tile floor. He groans and magicks the stuff away.

Alastor holds out the mug. “It’s a wonder you’re able to accomplish anything amidst such chaos.”

Lucifer takes the coffee and glances around at his workshop — at the overflowing shelves, the pile of random lithium-ion batteries in the corner, the charred remains of an exploded rollercoaster car for Lu Lu World which he’d never bothered to clean up. How long has it been since anyone visited the palace? Has it really been a couple … hundred years? 

“Hah — I get by somehow,” Lucifer says. 

Alastor steps around the table, studying the machinery around the edges of the room. He pauses at the narrow unmade bed tucked in the corner. Lucifer’s face heats — he’d forgotten about the ducky quilt. 

“Do you spend most of your time here?” 

“Um,” Lucifer says. “I sleep down here, yeah. I’m usually making stuff when I’m at home. This is where I work on the big stuff. Engines and … whatever. I have a smaller workshop upstairs where I make the, uh — the ducks.”

“May I see it?” 

“You want the tour?” 

“If you please,” Alastor says.

“Uh, okay — sure. I can do that. Yep.” He crosses the room and opens the door to the hall. “Right this way.” 

Lucifer heads for the entry hall. Alastor follows; their footsteps echo on the tile. The main hallway is lined with red doors, most of which have been shut for years. The palace is larger than the hotel, but for as long as Lucifer has lived alone, he’s used only a small fraction of its rooms. 

“Where do these doors lead?” Alastor says. 

“Oh — nowhere,” Lucifer says. “Just rooms that haven’t been used in a long time.” He points at the closed doors. “That one used to be Charlie’s playroom — on the right here was the music room. This was Lilith’s office. And this was Charlie’s classroom, back when she had a tutor.”

They step out into the entry hall. On their right, a wide marble staircase leads to the second and third floors; Lucifer leads Alastor past it, through the wide archway beside the stairs. 

“This is the kitchen,” he says. “I’ve got a bunch of snacks from Earth in the pantry, if there’s anything you want to try — I put a spell on the whole room to keep food from going bad.” 

Lucifer sits on one of the barstools at the kitchen island and watches Alastor peruse his collection of sugar cereals as though it were a shelf in a library. 

“Which cereal is your favorite?” 

“Hoo boy — that’s a tricky question. Um — I’ve definitely got a soft spot for — see that blue box on your right there? That’s Cotton Candy Crunch.” 

Alastor pulls the box off the shelf and regards it with a raised eyebrow.

“Yes! That one. It’s so good — but they discontinued it a couple of years back.” 

Alastor opens the box, pours a couple of pieces into his hand, and pops one into his mouth.

“Hm,” he says. 

“Yeah, they’re, uh — they’re pretty sweet.” Lucifer hops down off the barstool and slides the cereal from Alastor’s hand into his own — their hands brush together, and Lucifer’s kitchen becomes Alastor’s, in the yellow house. There’s a pile of dishes in the sink, a layer of dust over Alastor’s mother’s cast-iron pan. This memory is near the end of Alastor’s life, when he lived alone. 

Lucifer glances up and meets Alastor’s hazel eyes. Alastor is older than usual; orange evening light filters through the kitchen window and catches in the strands of gray in Alastor’s curls, glints off the copper frames of his round eyeglasses. Lucifer struggles to place this memory among the hundreds of evenings at the end of Alastor’s life in which he came home to an empty house, made a sandwich, smoked on the porch, and then went to sleep. 

Lucifer studies the faint lines that were just beginning to appear at the corners of Alastor’s eyes in his early thirties. What might Alastor have looked like, if he’d had the chance to grow old? Lucifer’s body might as well be carved from stone; it has never aged, never changed, apart from the switch flipped when he fell — but he knows enough of human souls to envy the terms of their existence, where time is precious and the world is always in motion. Alastor’s thirty-one year human life had passed, for Lucifer, in the blink of an eye; the time had meant nothing to him, and so he had slept it away in complete isolation, wandering the palace halls and watching rubber ducks fill up its empty corners.

Alastor is still studying Lucifer with that intensity that always makes Lucifer feel utterly transparent. Some corner of Lucifer’s mind prickles with the urge to turn away, to crack a joke, to make a passable attempt at hiding the jumble of emotions playing out across his face — but Lucifer can’t move — he is transfixed by the way the sunlight catches in Alastor’s eyelashes, like paint in a paintbrush.

“Um,” Lucifer says.

The memory dissolves; they are back in the palace kitchen. Lucifer remembers the cereal in his hand and pours it into his mouth — no point in letting perfectly good Cotton Candy Crunch go to waste. 

[cryingatships]

Royalty au KimKenta keeps plaguing my waking moments but I don't have any time to write an actual fic, so here's some random thoughts-

Tony's an asshole king who has a legitimate son Kenta (along with multiple illegitimate ones), who is supposed to be the crown prince, but turned out to be an omega and is hence struck out from the line of succession.

Tony plans on holding a tournament beckoning all the brave and worthy from his kingdom (and also from other kingdoms) to duel for the Prince's hand, hoping to secure himself a powerful warrior or a wealthy noble house as an ally. This is partly because he's aware that the peasant of his kingdom will protest soon and maybe even overturn his rule, unless he has some strong/filthy rich friends to repel the attack, and partly cause he's an evil evil man who would not hesitate to auction his son off just to get rid of him from the line of succession safely.

He plans to make Way his next successor, but also considers Babe, his two illegitimate sons, and encourages them to compete in politics, duels etc except Way and Babe grew up together as unfavoured illegitimate children in a backwater caste far, far away from the royal palace and is thus very good friends who would rather help e/o out of Tony's wrath than fight for the throne.

Also Way is in love with the leader of the rebel peasants Pete and is not too eager for the throne anyway, and Babe would rather ride off as an adventurer into the horizon with a puppy-like, loyal page he met into the palace called Charlie. (Way is a lil jealous that Charlie becomes closer to Babe and takes his place as Babe's closest confidant, but he's busy planning Tony's downfall with Pete to pay it much mind.)

Anyway, as the tournament is arranged, knights and nobles rush in from diff corners of the kingdom, eager for the hand of omega who used to be the crown prince and was set to be the next king. Knights also come from far-away lands, and with them comes Kim, a very average and inconspicuous beta in his brown horse and the lack of finely crafted details in his armour.

In the opening day of the tournament, Tony greets the competing knights and nobles from a high podium, with three sons at his side, basically showing off his two strong successors—one enigma and one alpha, both his special powers—and the prize of the tournament, the 'beautiful' omega prince Kenta.

Kenta has the most frightening scowl, mastered from years of experience in attending council meetings with wily old coots from the nobility, as he hears Tony's words. He knows he has none of the so-called 'lovely omegan qualities' of docility, soft words and gentleness, and he certainly had not stayed cloistered inside the walls of the palace all his life like a proper little omega. He knows it, Tony knows it, and everyone in or below the podium knows it, but the all keep quiet and smile cause there are wayy too many benefits in winning the hand of the sole omega prince of the royal family.

As Tony is going on and on in his speech about the kingdom's fertile lands and it's military strength (and taking not a world about the starving population and the discontent brewing underneath), Kenta meets the eyes of an unassuming knight standing at the very back of the crowd—Kim. He feels a zap through his mind, the world stops, they both get lost in e/o's eyes etc etc, but then Tony's speech is over and the tournament is set to begin.

Kenta and Kim's eyes hardly stray from e/o and even Babe and Way makes note of Kenta's sudden strangeness, even though Kenta is mostly quiet all the time.

Kim wins through the initial rounds of the tournament, rising from an unknown little knight from the wilderness to one of the favourites to win the prince's hand. (Yes, there are bets going on about who's gonna be the prince's groom, you think Tony will let go of such a lucrative source of income?).

Kenta does not get to attend every single day of the competition because Tony is busy which means Babe and Way are also busy, extra busy in fact, but he makes sure to know the results of each day's duels well. He used to be the crown prince, he's got connections.

Kenta also gets flowers and an intricately curved dagger that looks like an heirloom and a few trinkets that look handmade and some delicacies that he has never seen before (and he was the crown prince with access to every delicacy in the kingdom) in his windowsill every day, but his rooms are on the second floor of the palace's most well guarded section so that def makes him raise his brows.

While all this is happening, while strolling in the palace gardens one day, Kenta comes across Way and Babe talking together behind a particularly high hedge in one of the less well-kept, semi-abandoned parts of the garden. This also makes him raise his brows, because while he knew Way and Babe grew up in the same palace, he (and everyone else) were under the impression that they were never close, and after coming back to the palace they have been separates even more by Tony's ploys and essentially turned into enemies fighting for the throne.

So why were they huddled so close together?

Way and Babe also see him and Babe grit his teeth and pull out the dagger strapped to his waist, which in turn makes Kenta grip the dagger hidden inside his clothes, the one he got on his windowsill, since Tony had confusticated all his weapons after his came out as omega under the guise of omegas needing to be soft and gentle and helpless. (the truth is that Tony was afraid Kenta will harm his face and bring down his value in the marriage market, or try to kill himself outright.) Kenta knows he has accidentally stumbled onto some secret between the two would-be crown princes, and would now be killed to keep his silence. He's ready to fight to death and take someone, or both, down with him. (he sort of also hates Way and Babe for taking away his position and his secure life, even though deep in his heart he knows that Tony's the real culprit.)

But Way holds Babe's waist and stops him and to Kenta's surprise, Prince Babe, well knows for his brash, aggressive, I-listen-to-no-one-not-even-the-king personality, listens and relents.

Way calls him closer, and then holds a knife to Kenta's throat saying that since Kenta has chanced upon their secret he will now know it all, and threatens Kenta to keep his silence because their plan will succeed, even if they need to die for it, and that he has the resources and the will to drag Kenta along to hell with him if Kenta spills it out.

Then they tell Kenta. Mostly Way tells him, while Babe glowers at him in silence. Apparently, Way is in cahoots with the peasant leader Pete (Kenta does not miss the stars in Way's eyes as he speaks the name. He meets Babe's eyes and they both know what it means and swiftly look away, knowing better than to bring it up), and the peasant rebels are all ready to kill Tony and are much, much more powerful than Kenta had ever known even with his extensive information network within the kingdom. Pete is also a son of a

Way: You were not supposed to know but as your step brothers it's our duty to keep you safe, so we told you everything. Hope this gives you enough time to make your own plans and escape with your little suitor, brother. Now stay quiet abt this or I swear upon heavens I WILL kill you, brothers or not. Kenta: Wait suitor?? Babe: You think we don't know that someone keeps putting courting gifts on your windowsill? We may be new here in the palace, but we got networks, y'know. Kenta: *panicking tho he tells himself it's cause he doesn't want an innocent man to die and not because he likes the person leaving them or anything* Then.... Tony...??? Babe: What, you think that incompetent fool knows anything other than to raise taxes, hear flattery, and get a new mistress every season? Kenta: ....Then who is it? Way: *winking* that's for us to know and you to find out.

I have MUCH THOUGHTS still, maybe i'll write them in another post sometime

[cherry-pop-elf]

I hope this ask finds you well. I wanted to request some headcannons you may have about Bill Weasley? They could be like general hc about him or relationship hc, whatever you like.

Oh hell yeah-! My favorite mentally unstable boy! I love Bill so much. There is so much untapped potential with him. Kisses for you anon. On your little sunglasses head-! 💋

Some Random Bill Weasley 🧡 Headcanons

He was into curse breaking before he even had a wand. There was even a case where Arthur came home with a cursed watch someone snuck into his pocket, and Bill was able to de curse it. No wand needed. He was meant for greatness from then on

The reason Ginny doesn’t have any real long turn damage from the diary, besides ya know trauma, was because of Bill. Given his history of curse breaking, and 100% defiantly dealing with a Horcrux before, he was able to make sure she was able to recover to the best of his abilities. Helps that Ginny is a fighter all the same

His patronus used to be that of a lion, but after the werewolf attack it became that of a wolf.

He has a wand with a Horned Serpent Horn core. It’s perfect for a curse breaker. To help them sense danger when they can’t see or feel it themselves

The only reason he has long hair was he convinced Molly that he grew it out to help Ginny not feel ‘girly’ for having long hair. Charlie hates him for stealing his plans

He moved back to working at Gringotts after the war. As to be closer to George, given Fred’s passing. The goblins welcomed him with open arms, and give him scheduled time off for when the full moon comes around

Given he is a curse breaker, it literally sucks the life out of you. So he is rather pale and slender. It also means mental health is extremely important, so he has a lot of vacations. Along with is the family therapist. As if he wasn’t being the eldest

He works a side hobby with trying to find a cure, some kind of new medication, for Werewolfism. Since he himself did not suffer its extreme effects, he figured due to being a curse breaker, he figured a break through. That if you treat the wound quickly, as if a typical curse, it can be stopped

He is a leading advocate for werewolf equality, and uses his curse breaking title to hold weight in what he does and says. Hermione is proud, and Lupin is as well

He is also 100% part of Abigail’s Pack

And might have possibly slept with her dad at some point shushhhhh

Gerald Grey x Bill Weasley Art When?

He 100% is now super into pet play because of the incident, btw. Whoopsies!

Fleur sure isn’t complaining

He’s now called the “family dog” and he has bitten people so that didn’t help

Anyone that pisses him off he has bitten and made comments about how he ‘licked your stuff’ to scare them. You play stupid games you get stupid prizes. The goblins love him so you are out of luck

Speaking of them, it’s actually canon he was taken in as a curse breaker after Hogwarts. Meaning he’s probs one of the youngest curse breakers ever at being 17-18. So the goblins 100% are a bunch of old men with their ginger kid. Fuck with him? You have to deal with a bunch of angry goblins. Leave their adopted ginger alone!

[the0retically]

JRWI What If: Intergalactic Gameshow:

That was a wild ride and I adored it so so much here are my thoughts :)

- This is just friends being unhinged and playing D&D I adore this

- GRIZZ JUST CANONIZED CONNOR DYING TO THE RATS?????

- CHIP IS HERE AND A BABY???? AND 200 FEET TALL??

- “Her face shows disgust ‘Gillion I hate babies’” ICONIC LETS GO ASTER

- BABY JAY FERIN?????? JAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- This is utter insanity I love it

- God Gill is having Such a bad day he just cannot get out of this situation with baby Chip and baby Jay

- “IS THIS THE FAVOR NIKLAUS? IS THIS THE FAVOR?????” GILLION PLEASE

- I love the bit about Jesus and Vyncent sharing the whole story of the Bible

- Vyncent being able to see the others health bar??? That’s so cool what the heck

- Aster giving so much lore because Mythborne didn’t continue is so so fun

- :((((((( this trio is so sweet, I love them, they’re like the perfect group for this, they’re so fun

- They’re just unhinged

- MORE APPEAR EVERY TIME GILL GETS CAUGHT????

- :((( I miss the pretzel noises

- WAIT WHY ARE THEY JUST PLAYING CHESS??

- God I love aster and gill they’re friendship is so nice

- PRETZEL GOT A NAT 20 TO BEAT ASTER AT CHESS!!!!

- GILL WITH SANCTUARY IS SO GOOD!!! HES JUST THROWING RANDOM THINGS OUTSIDE NOW??

- Asters crying noooooooo it’s ok girl!! Chess isn’t everyone’s strong suit!

- I love the bit of Charlie lowering his volume and yelling to create the image of his characters doing chaos in the background

- Oh?? Charlie why do you want just a little bit left?? HAHHA HOLY SHIT HES BLASTING THE ROOMBAS INTO THE GOLD COUNTER

- ???? An mvp??

- “What’s squid game?” “It’s an undersea thing”

- Wait they’re talking about the voice and if it’s recognizable to any of them and Aster asking Gill if he knows any bastards that would do this and Gill giving a thought and saying Chip and Bizly just smiling, IS IT CHIP??

- “Actual psychopath interactions” yeah that sums up aster and gill

- OH?? People from their backstory’s in the audience!

- “How many chips in the audience? Just one” “ok didn’t know what type of hell this was”

- “Is Connor in the audience?” “No he’s dead, you can see his bofa shirt under the pile of rats staring at you” “I set the audience on fire”

- “…..the wet thorny people?? I’m still working on a team name” ok gill

- “We’re all banging and Aster” please??

- Oh these questions are starting out Rough

- Gillion just believing he’s in hell is actually so sad, he’s just Given up

- “Aster, do you wish you had more screen time?” “In this??” “In general” OH MY GOD????? BIZLY

- ASTER AND GILL TRYING TO PERSUADE BY ACTING CUTE PLEASE??

- I miss Aster :( she’s amazing Mythborne come back pleaseeee

- He’s just putting the roomba in the briefcase??? GILL PLEASE

- “‘I love big prizes’ and she slams big” ASTER, god they’re probably building a monster to fight and Aster is building a big fast dumb and ugly?? creature

- “Oh my god did we just create Jesus Christ??” VYNCENT PLEASE

- LETS GO ASTER!! THAT TRANSFORMATION IS SO COOL

- “Up next will be this creature” “oh no!” Charlie has such bad luck with this

- Aster is cracked she’s so cool

- :((((((( I miss Gillion :((((

- Gill and Vyncent debating the trolly problem mid fight is So them I love it

- 16 out of 40??????? Vyncent oh no

- HOLD PERSON LETS GOOOOOO ASTER

- The flavor of all of their attacks is amazing

- The JRWI theme coming in for this team attack is PERFECT!!!!! I love this podcast so much :)

- The glitching…….bebo what’s that about

- :(( “see you in 5” they’re not seeing each other again but I love their friendship so much

- This goodbye is gonna make me cry??? I love it so much, it’s just so sweet, that trio is amazing and I love how immediately they were friends with each other

- “Thanks for playing” BIZLY IM GONNA CRY

- This was so sweet and amazing

- VYNCENT :(((((( AND TIDE IS HELPING WITH HIS HOMEWORK

- this was so so so sweet

- every pc in the campaigns is the epitome of “do you think we’re friends in every universe?” “I’d like to think so” because they are, they’re always going to be friends no matter what universe they’re in and who they are

- PLEASE MORE WHAT IFS WITH A MISMATCHED PARTY THIS WAS AMAZING!! :)!!!!

[welcome-to-roomba-fazbender]

Random Christmas Prize Time! 5

“... to be honest i don’t even want this thing if no one claims this prize i’ll just throw it away i hate this shirt with every fiber of my being”

“First person to send me the code *SLIVER* Thru an ask will win a t-shirt this post will be updated once the winner appears!”

“the winner will be @’d and their prize will be added to the post as well”

congratulations??? to @davidthephoneguy​ you’ve won todays prize ... i wouldn’t be happy about this it smells like fish and curdled strawberry milk but here’s your prize!

[icarus-star]

this is so random BUT i feel like charlie defo has like a stuffed animal that he CANNOT sleep without at all , n' he'd defo be the type to give it a name n' everything like it's his no.1 prized possession. it just came to my head and i thought I'd like give you something to boost ur obsession pooks :3

(have this random happy cat :3)

this!!!!!!

i rlly feel like it would b a lil whale plushie or some animal like that! maybe a kiwi bird? whale or bird probably :3

it's definitely something that belonged to him when he was a kid, he never let go of it then n he doesn't let go of it now

(a happy cat for u 🫶)

[ashwilliamscumslut]

honey buns

Walking to the store was Dennis'  favorite part of the week. He knew he was gonna get some good food and get to see the hot  babes while walking there. It was heaven for him. “HURRY UP U IDIOT” Power shouted at  him she was always hungry and would always steal from the store whenever we went but Aki would always pay for the stuff she stole and the damage she did. Aki was tired but knew he had to do this trip or else he would wake up with bite marks from power “I swear to god power you better not steal, bite, or destroy anything or anybody this time.” Aki groaned. “I've done no such thing! Dennis did it all tis true!” power said as she ran for the supermarket.  Once they got inside Dennis and power ran off, it was a perfect day for them to come to the supermarket that had just restocked with all their favorites. As Dennis was walking through an aisle grabbing snacks he heard a voice talking to him, he turned around and looked everywhere but he couldn’t see where the source was coming from “Is that you god?” he asked, amazed.   “Yes tis I god! Dennis, I have an important job for you to do. You'll get rewarded greatly for it !” said the voice. Dennis was thinking of all the possibilities of rewards he could get. He didn't care what he had to do, he just wanted his prize “YES WHAT IS IT GOD? I’LL DO ANYTHING ”  He shouted.  A sudden pause followed by the sound of someone swatting someone else away “I need you to throw  blazing hot honey buns at the homeless people outside!!” God said “but why? They're just sitting there.”. A couple seconds passed “But you’re wrong!! They’re not normal homeless people, they're the homeless person devil quick before it hurts the people in the store!!” Dennis knew what he had to do, he had to protect all the hot babes from the homeless person devil. He grabbed 30 honey buns and heated them up for 30 minutes, holding them he walked out of the store and stared at the homeless person sitting there. “Homeless person devil!! Your time is up!!!” he shouted “My name is Charlie actually” the homeless person said. “I DON’T CARE WHAT A DEVIL'S NAME IS  BE GONE U DUMB DEVIL !!” Dennis shouted as he threw all 30 honey buns at him. He stood there proud watching the devil scream in pain as their skin melted off. Suddenly Aki came out yelling at power “GOD DAMNIT WHY DO YOU ALWAYS DO THIS NOW LOOK WHAT U MADE HIM DO”  “tis wasn't me it was god! I swear!” “I SAW YOU TALKING TO HIM FROM BEHIND THE SHELF DON’T LIE” “I think you forgot your meds Aki I wasn’t near him” .

Dennis stood there realizing his mistake, don’t trust a random voice you heard especially if you’re with power.

[ichigo777666]

Stasis: Bone Totem

Oh spoilers ahoy for one of the plot points

I freaking love Calaban! For an AI, its certainly gives no shits! Calaban doesn't care what its creators want it to do - it's doing what IT wants to do. And I love Calaban for that.

From text logs we can see that Calaban has repeated violated orders/restrictions/rules and hasn't cared at all.

From a message from one of the workstations there's a message from the corp:

"The Nexus was plagued by the presence of one of the Nine who showed contempt for the rules". That's Calaban. So they "offere Numen a chance to repent and reform its ways" hence they shipped Calaban off to the undersea labs to do work. But Calaban wasn't ready to change and kept on occurring violations, so....

From Callan's PDA. They didn't know what to do with Calaban - the Numen are after all supposed to be sacred untouchable things so they couldn't just kill/erase it. So they abandoned Calaban at the bottom of the ocean. Yeah, not smart. Even Callan knew better than to make it mad.

"Would risk pissing that thing off". Yeah, that's a bad decision. Piss of a super advanced highly intelligent AI who gives no shits . Obviously this is a way to ensure that Calaban hates you and the company.

We can also conclude that Calaban was trapped for 10+ years. We can infer at least the 10 years from another PDA log this one from Barton.

Given this Alpha was decom. 10 years before Barton arrived so Calaban's been rotting for at least that long. No wonder the STEM Charlie finds it in is rotting/decaying so badly. Given the time, its obvious that Calaban had to wait for that long to get a signal out likely due to interference from the other parts of the lab. We see that Yellow Leaf sent in a few people into the MULE and yet not one seemed to even know Calaban existed. If they had know, it would have been a priority. So my assumption is as stated: the signals from the other MULE labs caused Calaban to be unable to send out a signal from the weakened ALPHA labs. Only once everyone else was dead (or changed) did Calaban's attempts work.

And Calaban's first act was to turn on Cayne that abandoned him and seek help from Yellow Leaf to the points its ready to betray all of the secrets it knows about Cayne. Calaban's flat out ready to tell Mac, a total stranger who clearly wasn't in on the whole rescue plan, the truth about the Nexus until Mac refuses so it's clearly lost any restraints on telling its secrets.

And, on a side note here, this occurred to me on my 2nd playthrough. Those random cutscenes that seem to look through cameras as certain points in the story - that's Calaban. That's Calaban accessing the cameras to track the progress and judge the worthiness of the rescuers by Yellow Leaf. Until Charlie reaches ALPHA Calaban doesn't have the signal strength to interact with them, so it watches through the cameras and computers as they run around the labs.

Given this history Calaban's request for Charlie to integrate it makes perfect sense. It was a prized Cayne AI but they abandoned it at the bottom of the sea when they saw how independent Calaban was. Now these strangers come up saying they'll help and Calaban doesn't trust them at all - so it insists on the integration. That way they CAN'T leave Calaban behind again.

Why Charlie? Well the obvious is that she's the one who's working with Yellow Leaf but she's also the smartest choice. Calaban can't merge with Moses (Moses dies if you try), likely due to Moses having his own STEM already and having two is too much for the smart bear body; also Moses is a machine so if worst comes to worst and someone has to e sacrificed, it'd likely be Moses as the only non-living part of the party. That leaves Mac and Charlie. Mac is very protective of Charlie, more so than Charlie is of him. When he finds out that Charlie's behind all of this, he's genuinely angry and then upset but that doesn't stay long. If Calaban has been watching all along (as I suspect) then he's seen Mac and Charlie this whole time and seen how Mac is doing everything for her. When they descended on the first bell and the room flooded, Mac held the door open for Charlie to let her escape concerned with her safety over his own. Every time Charlie's in danger or taking risks, Mac responds with concern...which is not what Charlie responds with when Mac does risky things aside from her momentary panic following that flood escape. Calaban has calculated all of this and probably has already predicted that, if push comes to shove and only one surviving is possible, that Mac would give up his life for Charlie. So Charlie is Calaban's best bet at surviving.

Calaban is the only truly transparent character in the party; what you see if what you get. Everyone else is bogged down with issues.

-Mac is struggling both financially and mentally. He's lost the house and possibly his permit and wondering how long it'll be before he's got nothing left. He's burred his grief over Hope, refusing to talk about her unless necessary, and replaced it with anger towards Moses (and towards himself as well even if he doesn't accept that).

-Moses, even though he's a computer/AI, is struggling with guilt and self doubt. Moses knows he's part of the reason Hope is gone (even though Hope herself chose to follow after Moses) and he's partially accepted that but his programming as the smart bear and Hope's best friend is his programming - he mentions it constantly even though he knows Hope is gone. Moses is depressed, if he can be depressed, and struggling with the feelings of loss and failure. And Mac's anger and rage at him isn't helping.

-Charlie is drowning in her grief still. Although she's gotten good at burring it, she's emotionally unstable. Given the phone call flashback with Mac, it's likely that Charlie was there on the beach that day and ultimately got to witness part of Hope's death. She doesn't blame Moses - she blames HERSELF. While Mac & Moses both blame Moses, Charlie blames herself and she internalizes it, putting on a brave front when she's crumbling on the inside. Her desire to have Hope back, to 'fix' her life is all consuming. She's ready to do anything for it and risk everything, which is how she winds up making the deal that starts the game.

-And Faran. Faran is interesting. Before his infection, he seemed a bit cantankerous - he didn't like the stuffed dog to the point where he chose to make his feelings known and have himself moved away from that. His desire to explore and find out what was down the well despite knowing there would be risks led to his situation. When he's confronted with the truth of what he is, he lashes out in anger and it takes Moses talking to him to get him to give anything. Faran starts helping to see if Moses is right, out of curiosity at first, and slowly becomes more invested as time passes, desperately trying to fix things. Faran was the first real infection case due to his pride and carelessness. The reports say that there's an arrowhead/spearhead lodged in his head - he was obviously ambushed by the natives. This likely wouldn't have been possible if a whole group had gone down but it was just Faran. If Faran hadn't gone alone the whole infection starting wouldn't have happened and the entirety of the fate of the crew might have taken a different path.

-And then there's Calaban. Calaban who comes off as snooty / demeaning / argumentative and more. But Calaban is also an AI, not a human with emotions. It has a goal - to escape and everything it decides is to reach that goal. It makes no attachments and cares not for emotions or trivial things. It makes decisions based on numbers and odds not emotions. A human wouldn't have willingly exposed Charlie to the Veles but because it was the best route, Calaban took it, not caring if it caused her pain. Calaban read and calculated everyone perfectly knowing Mac would come and save Charlie and thus itself. Even after being attached to Charlie for so long, Calaban still only refers to her as 'the female'. Calaban is still just itself; purely logical. Is it any wonder why it put iself in charge when the party consists of three damaged individuals (four if we count Faran) making poor choices?

....and on a personal hilarious side note, it reduces me to giggles to think of an AU where Calaban can see all the screw-ups and deaths happening like when the characters "get stuck" trying to solve simple puzzles or when they "accidentally" kill themselves over and over and just internally suffering because SHIT these people are IDIOTS and yet they're its only hope for survival so double shit! Which is why Calaban gets so wordy after meeting up with them cause dang it, now your stupidity will kill me so it basically holds your hand at points like the characters are pathetic lost children.

[peligin-eyed]

Oolong, lapsang souchong, rooibos? ( - the-insouciant-scientist)

(I’ve got doubles of a couple prompts, so I’ll answer half here and half later)

Oolong: How does your OC decorate their space?

Ambrose loves luxury, shiny things, and he’s a bit of a hoarder collector. His decor style is pretty maximalist and the only reason his space isn’t overly cluttered is because he employs a very organized housekeeper. There are a lot of bookshelves, some filled with books and some filled with random trinkets and treasures. He has a nice china cabinet for his T8 item collection (also holding some of his husband’s more valuable stolen prizes). In between the shelves, he’s hung up artwork he bought from various artist friends. There’s also a framed collection of newspaper clippings featuring him or his accomplishments. He likes velvet upholstery, imported rugs, and silk sheets and curtains.

Emery is more concerned with functionality than decoration. Their wife handles most of the decor for their London home, though they have a little study where they have a couple shelves to display their collection of ships-in-bottles and some of their hunting trophies mounted on the wall. The Vake head is positioned so that it is directly above their head when they’re sitting at the desk, staring at anyone sitting across from them. In their shipboard cabin, they have maps and notes tacked up all over the walls, weapons and supplies half-in and half-out of a big sea chest, and extra blankets draped on the bed.

Robin doesn’t like to put too much stuff up on the walls, just in case they need to leave in a hurry. They keep a handful of meaningful notes, photos, and letters in a leather wrap under their pillow. If they put up anything, it’s drawings they get from the urchins they sometimes spend time with. If glow-in-the-dark stars existed in flondon, though, they’d put those on the ceiling above their bed. When choosing stuff like furniture, they like sturdy pieces with soft fabrics and warm colors.

Lapsang Souchong: If your OC was a scented candle, what would they smell like?

Ambrose: black currant, absinthe, vanilla

Emery: sea breeze, leather, musk

Robin: spiced honey, cinnamon, smoky amber

Henry: teakwood, petrichor, lavender

Liam: bergamot, sandalwood, moss

Charlie: caramel, coffee, sweet tobacco

Rooibos: What kind of lighting does your OC prefer? Dim, bright, moody, secret fourth thing?

Ambrose enjoys some nice mood lighting- strategically placed candles, tinted lampshades, lightweight cloth tossed over a lamp. He’ll keep it bright enough to see easily when he’s working/writing/reading, though. He’d love those color changing lights or, like, lava lamps.

Emery doesn’t have strong lighting preferences, they’ll make do with whatever the environment provides. Left to their own devices, they keep it moderately bright.

Robin definitely prefers dimmer light or even darkness. They feel uncomfortable and exposed when it’s too bright. Parabola is an exception though, they actually love the glow of the cosmogone sun.

Tea asks

[foodfightnovelization]

Websites, Web Videos and Production Stills

Alright, so before the end of the novelization I want to just take a minute to talk about the various Foodfight! websites from over the years. From about 2001-2005, foodfight.com was simply a brief Flash animation of the movie's logo, with a second animation saying "When good food...goes BAD!" Not much to talk about, right?

However, in around 2006 the website was updated into, well, an actual website! You can still check it out here via the Internet Archive: https://web.archive.org/web/20060901184349/http://www.foodfight.com/FF-flash.html

This is honestly pretty cool- we get a brief summary of the plot, a bunch of character bios that explain things about Dex, Dan and the other Ikes that are NEVER made clear in the movie itself -for instance, did you know the cereal Dex is the mascot for actually contains a free toy of him in every box? If that was a real cereal (and they WERE planning to make it one when this movie was something of a big deal) I would've loved that, I miss cereal prizes so dearly. These character bios also show concept art from an earlier version of the movie- art that again, looks far more visually appealing than the movie we ended up with. How is it basically everything about Foodfight! except the movie itself is actually pretty cool?

The website even opens with a genuinely impressive animation of the grocery store transforming into Marketropolis- I can't really show it here because it's animated, but if you follow the link you'll see it and it looks AWESOME- it really makes you think "yeah, supermarkets DO kinda look like cities!", right? Also, on the Production page we see the character model for a large, ugly Brand X soldier who we never see in the finished film. Is this the fabled Brand X Mashed Potato Man? (Almost definitely yes, there's nobody else this could be)

Well, he looks absolutely HORRIFYING, but it's good to know what this character would've looked like had he not been replaced by the Brand X Lunchlady. On the Partners page as well, we see one of the companies the studio is working with is Random House, who published the novelization we've been analyzing for the past twenty-something blog posts. So far, this is the only evidence I've found of the novelization's existence outside of the copy of it I own, so it's good to see it get some acknowledgement. There's not much else to talk about with this website, so now let's move onto the next- that's right, there was ANOTHER website.

So as you may or may not know, Foodfight was initially released in theaters in 2012 in the UK and Ireland- it makes no sense at all to release it there, as British people aren't going to be familiar with characters like Charlie The Tuna or Twinkie the Kid, but apparently this was part of a contractual obligation the studio HAD to fulfill of giving it a theatrical release SOMEWHERE. As it happens, I actually grew up in England (I live in Canada now, however) and this theatrical release was where my obsession with Foodfight began. Back in 2012, I saw a poster for this movie outside a theater in London- it had Charlie Tuna, Twinkie The Kid and the Vlasic Stork on it, but I didn't recognize any of them because I was an 11 year old British child with no knowledge of Twinkies or tuna mascots. I DID however see Dex Dogtective up on the poster, and I was instantly enamoured because he looked like Indiana Jones, and I LOVED Indiana Jones back then. I begged to go see it, but was given a harsh and firm "no". Now 11 years later, I'm writing the most comprehensive blog about the movie to ever have existed. Life is funny like that sometimes, right? But that's not what we're here to talk about- when the movie was released in the UK and Ireland, there was a website coinciding with this release- foodfightmovie.co.uk.

This was also saved via the Web Archive, unfortunately however only the Introduction page of the site was saved. The picture above (and a button below that says "ENTER") is basically all that's left of this site, so whatever else was on there is long gone...right?

Well, not quite! In late 2012, this Youtube video was uploaded entitled "Foodfight vox pop". It shows the audience reaction after a theater screening in the UK, comprised mainly of very young children saying they liked the movie whilst holding various Foodfight plush toys. I can't find a source for this video ANYWHERE on the internet, so it's my theory this video was originally made for the "foodfightmovie.co.uk" website before it was lost to time. I don't have any definitive proof of that, but it doesn't make sense for this video to have come from anywhere else.

Now, I just have one last thing to share! These are production stills dated from sometime in 2007 that I found while scouring the web for more juicy tidbits about Foodfight! These stills mostly look similar to what we see in the final movie- however Lieutenant X, Sunshine, and Maximilius's character designs look far higher quality than what we see in the actual movie. The design of the ketchup tanks is slightly different as well, and Sunshine appears in a grassy meadow that looks vastly different from the one we see in the finished film. These aren't a huge deal, but based on the character designs and models we see here, we can say DEFINITIVELY that the version of the movie we know and...tolerate today was in development in 2007. Besides that, I wanted to share EVERYTHING I know about Foodfight on this blog, even the minor things that'd otherwise be uninteresting.

I really hope you enjoyed these- I didn't want to just talk about the novelization on this blog, I wanted to share the wider world of Foodfight! as well, from storyboards to concept art to long-lost videogames, and I hope by reading these you learned something you didn't already know. We have two more chapters to go before we reach the end of the novelization, so I say let's snap crackle and pop our way through to the end!