#characters that feel undeserving of love with characters who love them like its breathing have my entire heart

[aeroblossom]

arlecchino becoming enamored with furina and sending her daily letters asking to meet post archon quest at her home with cakes and flowers attached and neuvillette mailing her money every month for groceries, luxuries, sending over books and plays and operas he thinks she will like, trying to make her come to the palais anyhow versus furina who believes herself to be undeserving of love and thinking they only do it all out of pity and guilt

[dawnoftime22]

make it okay.

| W.M -> N.R

Undeserving of a Love Like Yours, Chapter 6

Chapter Warnings: Some subjects that you can kind of count as sensitive? Not getting enough sleep, Overthinking, Mental exhaustion, cheating, sad wanda and...I think, that's it. (please tell me if I'm missing any!)

Summary: With having finished a breakup with a cheating brunette, you go to visit Kate in New York, needing a best friend to keep you company in these trying times of yours.

Series Summary: When you're stuck in a complete hole of confusion and hurt with the one you thought you loved most, a certain redhead finds her way into your life.

Word Count: 5.1k

Category: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Angst

A/N: I'm veeeeery tired. very. need a hug. past few days was just :( also this chapter is mostly just kate giving comfort. sorry if I wrote her in a way thats off from her? I rarely write her character, but it was definitely fun, along with lucky. enjoy :]

Series Playlist

| Started on 05/03/2024, 3:49 PM |

| Finished on 18/03/2034, 6:53 PM |

Masterlist | Series Masterlist | N.R Masterlist

<- Chapter 5 Chapter 7 ->

"Having a soft and kind heart is a dangerous way of staying alive, sure. But I don't understand being cold and cruel when most of the world already is."

|——————————— ➳ ———————————|

After getting off the phone with Kate, you clicked on your seatbelt and put the car on drive, off to get out the side road. Before you do, you took one last look at the café and the flower shop. All that time spent, and for what, exactly?

You sigh. The wheel turns with your hand and you continue on driving, starting your journey to the airport. It wasn't a perfect day. Well, obviously, but the weather isn't perfect either. The sun shone down on you, burning up everything in its view outside while you pulled down the sun visor and turned the ac up.

It's hard not to get lost in thought as you made your way to the airport, your mind walking back to every memory, and every question you have unanswered. Is this how you're always gonna feel? Maybe so. Maybe not. But what were you supposed to do about it?

Nearly every scenery of this town that once had your heart beating of affection now doesn't even make it pulse at all. It stings, even dead, like the flower that was around it, grew thorns. You take a deep breath, trying to focus on the road.

Being in the love blackout already had you overthinking every little thing and wondering what exactly you've done wrong for Wanda to act so different, but it wasn't really you. It was her. Though, even with finding out about the new information, it didn't make things better. Of course, only worse.

Was it something you didn't do? Was it something you did? Or perhaps just a simple fall out of love. You should've known. Should've seen the signs. You didn't even want to think about it, but you can't help it. Did she leave her house in the middle of the night only for you to welcome her home? Did she gift someone else something while you got her flowers? Was she kissing another's lips while you sat there in the corner of the café, waiting for her?

You hear your phone making noise with notifications, one after another. You know it's Wanda, and your fingers twitch to reach out and grab it, but you don't pick up. Instead, you quickly put your hand out to silence your phone. If you didn't, or if you took any action that was opposite of that, you'd have turned the car around already.

You notice your vision getting blurry with tears, but you blink them away, needing to focus on the road ahead. You sigh when you stop at a red light, having time to wipe your eyes with your hands. The frustration only fueled your way forwards.

Getting drunk on New Year's Day, that was all just a ruse. Who knows if that wine was even hers that she bought. Maybe it was given by another. You would rest your head on your steering wheel by now in utter exhaustion and willingness to surrender to the unavoiding pit of pure darkness if you didn't have to keep your eyes on the road.

Another thought that distracted you from everything, was if you should call Carol. She'd probably wonder where you've gone and worry. But you decided you'll call her later.

An hour or two passes by and eventually the wheels of your car rolls up to the front entrance of the airport, the scattered crowds of people carrying luggages and trolleys making it a stark contrast from crowds outside of the airport.

Your eyes don't linger for too long, but your ears undeniably catch the PA announcer speaking, although New York was only mentioned once and it wasn't your flight. You continue on driving, getting through the many other cars sitting at the pickup site to go down to the basement, where the parking lot is.

It was packed, but not entirely. Passing by, you see shiny fresh cars, normal looking cars, and old dusty abandoned ones left by someone for some type of reason. You hoped your car doesn't end up like that, but you had no reason to let it sit in a parking lot for years. Soon, you found a small empty corner to slot your car into, easily going in.

The engine shuts down with the touch of your fingers and you get out, grabbing your bags and going over to the two-door entrance where the elevator was. Some people were there, but you try your best to simply stand and wait. Lucky you went in right as the elevator was about to arrive to the floor.

The airport lights were bright and blinding when the elevator doors open, making you squint your eyes and blink, but also remembering to step out and go over to the register section, grabbing your ticket.

Seeing as you got here early, your flight wasn't until an hour later, so you decide to roam the airport to get some breakfast first. Outside held plenty of restaurants and cafés though, so you went there.

You grabbed some breakfast from a café that caught your eyes, and sat down at the bench outside. It was pretty empty here, since most people were either at the entrance or the other side of the airport-- there, holding the more popular restaurants.

You were just about to grab your meal and take a bite after getting some liquid in your body when you feel a drop of water land on the skin of your hand.

Confused, your eyebrows furrowed as you look closer at it, the water rolling down your hand when you tilted it. You looked around to find nothing. Then the skies started to grow darker, the sun getting covered up by the clouds.

The rain came pouring down quickly after building up, making everyone else scramble to the entrance of the airport, it having a roof.

Meanwhile, a stranger somewhere at the parking lots was just stepping out their car when the rain came down. They go back in urgently, but only to grab an umbrella.

You were standing up from the bench and covering your head with your arms, about to do the same as most of the other people were doing. Running to shelter. Then, suddenly the raindrops on you stop.

Feeling the rain disappear, you slowly put down your arms and see a redhead beside you, holding an umbrella above the two of you to shield from the rain.

She didn't look at you for long, having turned her head to the airport entrance. Not wanting to get left behind, although you were sure you won't considering she had put the umbrella over you, you still quickly walk with her.

"Thank you," you say, chuckling a little as the coolness of the airport hits you combined with the rain drops on you, sending a shiver down your spine. You shove your hands in your pockets as she closes the umbrella.

"Of course." She said gently, her voice husky as she nods. Afterwards, nothing much happened. She had walked away, nearly in a hurry with her eyes focused on the big flight screen in the middle of the airport, but it wasn't entirely obvious unless you were staring closely at her. You guessed she was either late for her flight or was just trying to get to her area fast. A kind encounter with a stranger...at least there's one good thing for today.

You check the screen yourself, and your eyes searched for your own journey. When you didn't find it, you searched more panickly, until you restart from the top and it pops up. But it wasn't in its original place. Then, you go off to the side and see a bright red text gleaming with the word, 'DELAYED'.

Great. Now you have to wait longer. A bad thing right after the good thing. You sigh, but make your way to the sitting area anyway, going through security with ease.

Once you've gone to the section your plane would arrive...in a few hours. You sat down, sliding your phone out from your pocket and pulling up your direct messages with Kate, telling her you'll be late because of your flight.

After an hour passed of you being bored, scrolling on your phone and opening an app only to close it, mixed with overthinking while resting your head on your folded arms, a message finally pops up, and your fingers quickly tap on it.

Kate replied back with some film recommendations and videos of Lucky doing tricks and getting excited at the mention of your name, making you smile.

You guessed she was driving when you messaged her, but you didn't mind it, and watch the things she sent you.

It keeps you occupied for a long while, up until you forgot about time, but the sound of your plane arriving quickly reminded you.

You look up to the large windows at the side that showed the huge parking area of the airplanes. There were small cars along with someone holding red sticks to direct the plane.

Many eyes in the large room was watching everything go by, the vehicle holding all the passenger luggages, the people from that flight getting out. You guessed they were clearing it out and starting to clean up.

The other eyes in the room weren't even looking at all, focused on their phones, laptops, or simply their eyelids were closed in sleep. Most of them had probably been in an airport plenty of times to not be mesmerized by the movements and sound. Or doing work...or is simply tired.

You had enough time to finish up your movie before your plane was ready to board, making you gather your things and stand up, having finished your breakfast hours ago.

It didn't take much time to get in, easily going through the little portable hallway connected to the plane and letting the attendant check your ticket.

After finding your seat, you store your things in the compartment above, then settle down, buckling in the seatbelt. The seat beside you was empty up until a few minutes later, someone sitting in it. They did the same movements as you, but rather than watching the view out the window, they bring out a book, placing it in their lap as the plane started moving, having made sure everyone settled down and was seated.

You put on some music on your earphones and got ready for the journey ahead. It was only two hours to New York from where you were, but still you hoped it'll feel short. Maybe you'll get some sleep on the way.

|——————————— ➳ ———————————|

The plane soon landed once more, the turbulance actually smoother than most of the other ones you've gone through. The person beside you on the other hand, put the book they were reading down and grabbed onto their armchair.

You didn't pay much attention to it, more mesmerized by the tall buildings you can already see in the distance. You've been here plenty of times before to visit Kate, but the view was still stunning.

After the plane settled in its parking spot completely, you unbuckle your seatbelt and get up, just as everyone else, grabbing your bag and walking out.

A text to Kate was sent of your arrival. The walk felt longer than the flight as you made your way through security and up to the pickup site, where she was already waiting, your eyes quickly catching the familiar sight of the car and license plate.

You load the empty trunk of the car with your bags, then walk back to the front. The door opens with the pull of your hand, inside revealing the raven haired girl looking over to you with a gentle smile as you went in.

"Hey," She greeted, her voice soft and lightly pitched as she started moving the car out the side, both to get you two home and let the other cars pick someone else up.

"Hi. Sorry for being late," You say as you set your handheld bag down, buckling in your seatbelt as Kate's eyes flicker to you for a moment before focusing on the road again.

"Don't worry. It was pouring here." She goes to make a turn, getting out of the airport area and into the main road.

"I'm just glad you're safe," She says. A smile tugs up on the corners of your lips, your heart warming. Kate was always a caring, lighthearted and comforting person. No wonder you've been feeling so low...other than for obvious reasons. Calls and messages are never enough to capture the blanket feeling of being beside someone like that.

On the way, Kate asks a few questions and jokes here and there, catching up with you. There was a conversation needed to be talked about for sure, but she knows to save it for later, when you get more comfortable.

The rest of the journey to Kate's place was quiet, the silence only filled with the humming of the car and the music she put on. Your eyes watch the modern city buildings pass by. The sidewalks and roads were shining with the sheen of water, the rain having met it earlier.

It was only 4 pm, but you had a sort of sleepiness creeping up on you, perhaps from the mental, emotional and physical exhaustion mixed together. Kate notices, seeing how your eyes were too relaxed to count as just being calm. But she doesn't say anything, knowing you still wouldn't be able to fall asleep.

The car comes to a stop, making you snap out of being zoned out. Kate was gathering her things and turning off the engine of the car, moving to get out. Then you realize you had arrived at her apartment.

Your eyes go over the building as you got out the car, slamming the door closed...accidentally. Your eyes widen slightly and you grimace, looking at Kate, who had her mouth open in an O shape.

"Someone's really angry," she jokes, grabbing a plastic bag from the backseat. You gave a tight-lipped smile and went to the back of the car.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to," you quickly spew out your apology. The first hour you were with your best friend again, and you slam her car door. You grabbed your bags that were safely sitting in the trunk as she made her way to you.

"It's alright," she laughs, stepping in front of you while you slung your backpack over your shoulder. She held out a pack of dog treats to you while her other hand still held the plastic bag of groceries.

"Here." She puts out her hand further when you didn't take it, thinking you hadn't noticed. Then you look down and see what it is, your eyebrows furrowing in thought within your dazed mind.

You gasp when you realize it. "I get to feed Lucky?" You ask, your face brightening as you look back up at her. She nods, a smile on her face. You quietly cheer as she made her way to her apartment, her keys rattling in her hand as you followed behind her.

The door opens with a click, and instantly, you hear the sounds of a gentle bark and running coming from Lucky, having arrived at the front door quickly to meet the two of you.

"Hey, buddy." Kate holds the door with her body, leaning down slightly to card her fingers through Lucky's fur.

"Look. Look, it's Y/N." She points to you, making the golden dog run to you, jumping as he went. You smile and kneel down, greeting him as he started licking your face. Kate watches the excitement of Lucky from the door, a fond gaze on the two of you.

"Okay, okay. I've missed you, too. Let's get inside now," you manage to say in between laughs, standing up. You went in with Lucky staring up at the pack of treats in your hand, lightly pawing at it with his tongue sticking out his mouth.

"Wait, I need to put my stuff down first." You pull back the pack of dog treats away from him while Kate closes the door. You can see the impatience he tried to cover with a look of calmness, but you know he would jump on you if he needed to get the treats.

You kick off your shoes and set down your bags in the bedroom you usually sit in whenever you visit Kate, Lucky following you around and circling playfully around you at times.

"He's really missed you," Kate says with a laugh, putting her grocery bag on the kitchen counter to unload and store the contents into her fridge and cabinets.

"I can see that," you say quietly, focused on opening the bags and putting food in his food bowl. Before setting it down on the floor though, you hand feed him a treat, patting his head with your other hand gently as he instantly ate it.

"As much as I would love to play around with him though, I should probably go change and shower." You say, having set down Lucky's food bowl, giving him one last longing pat and standing back up.

"Do you wanna watch a movie when you're done?" Kate asks, turning to look at you as she got done storing everything.

"Yeah...I probably need it anyway. You can choose." You say with a nod, and Kate watches you go to your bedroom, off to get yourself cleaned up, unpack, and unwind. She knew exactly what you were saying, and her heart ached just a little at the mere thought of your troubled mind.

You close the door behind you, taking a deep breath in once you were inside, letting it out as a heavy sigh after, walking to your bags to slide the zipper open.

Everything seemed to hit you all at once, your shoulders feeling heavy as it moves along with your hand to grab your clothes. You go to the bathroom, fatigue within your movements as you close the door, pull off your clothes, and turn on the shower.

The warm water running down your skin welcomes you, letting you relax a bit and your muscles letting go of its tensions. The steam filling up a bit of your breathing from the shower makes your body feel comforted, the barely noticeable movement of it going to everything that was glass in the bathroom, fogging it up.

A gentle yawn leaves your mouth, finally feeling the exhaustion take you over. But you still had some energy within you, so you willed yourself to clean yourself up and wash your hair, then turning off the shower once you were done.

You dry yourself off, then put on your clothes. When you were about to go walk out the bathroom though, you had a thought and turn on the sink for a quick second, splashing your face with cold water before drying your face with your towel once more. Now you were a little more awake.

You get out of the bathroom, parts of your hair dripping slightly. Since you already had your clothes on, you decide to unpack everything else, storing your shirts and pants in the closet.

Your eyes flicker to the bed, and the urge to fall into it was strong, but you hold yourself back. If you went into bed by now, you knew you probably wouldn't be able to get up anytime soon.

Once you've dealt with unpacking, you put your bags off somewhere in a corner of the room and move to the door, getting out the bedroom. Out in the living room, you see Kate, already sat down on the couch with a movie set up on the tv. She notices you and looks up.

"Hey. I made us some fries and nuggets." She gestures her hand towards the plates of fries and nuggets accompanied with sauce, making the smallest smile cross your face.

You sit down next to her, grabbing a few and taking a bite, the crunch sounding out as she looked at you eating, resisting a smile when you hummed in delight.

You shift your position on the couch, getting comfortable while Lucky jumped up, laying beside you, only to then move to lay on both of your lap and Kate's, but his head was on your side, making her shake her head at her dog's antics.

Your eyes focus on the screen when Kate hits play, one of your hands patting Lucky's head and traveling down to his body fur while the other one grabs the chicken nuggets and fries.

Kate gently pokes your shoulder multiple times, making you turn to look at her. She had fries in between her teeth and mouth, sauce sitting on the end of it for extra effect of blood, looking like a vampire's fangs. Instantly, you giggle, to which turn to laughs when one of the fries fell, leaving only one in her mouth.

She laughs herself, and quickly go to retrieve the fallen french fry. Although, right as her fingers held it, Lucky had moved and turned to her side, chomping on the fry. Kate grabs the fry in her mouth, eating that before he could try to steal it from her too.

"Hey! That's not yours." She exclaimed, but Lucky only looked at her innocently, licking her face for a moment, probably asking for more. She laughed, but gently push him away, needing to see the tv too.

"You're lucky you're cute." She shakes her head when Lucky had stopped, and settled down in your laps again.

"He's not just Pizza Dog anymore." You start, and she turns her head to look at you, the both of you having something in your heads.

"French Fry Dog," you say simultaneously, the sound of your voices mixing together along with your soft laughs afterwards. Lucky only tilts his head, confused of the sudden sounds from the two of you.

You focus back on the movie, getting invested in the story. The nuggets and fries were slowly going down to an empty plate, counted as snacks for the movie, but still filling up your stomach. The day had transitioned into nighttime now, time going by quickly.

When Lucky moved to settle beside Kate instead, probably needing a new position just as you did, you move to lay down, your head on the armrest and your arm dangling off the couch. At some times of the movie, you space out, your mind occupied with thoughts.

Kate's eyes were completely on the tv, comfortable and fully focused on the story. Your eyes flicker over to her for a split second before returning to the screen, your teeth sinking into your bottom lip.

"Kate?" You whisper, barely even within the sound volume of a breath. She hums and looks over to you, your body seeming weak against the couch. Lucky was now sleeping beside her.

"What if it doesn't get better?" Your eyes travel down to the floor, not meeting her eyes. Her eyebrows furrow at the suddenness of your sentence, and she sits up more properly.

Having felt the change in your demeanor, Kate quickly pauses the movie, putting all her attention on you. "Don't say that," She counters in a gentle tone.

"You'll get through it. You always have," She says, her voice a soothing sound through the night air. The crickets make noise in the background, having replaced the sounds of the movie now that it was paused.

"Do you think it was me?" You whisper, sitting up because your cheek was starting to get sore from resting against the armrest. You fiddle with your fingers and look at her as Kate quickly shakes her head.

"No. You've stayed through it with her in the worst of times and the best." She takes in how you fiddled with your fingers, a hint to your dark mind. A small gentle, although bit of a sad smile goes over her face as she thought of the softness of your heart.

"Everyone has their mistakes but after all this time I've known you, I think you have been so brave and just...such an amazing person." She says, knowing the many gestures of gifts and time and reassurances you've done before, both to strangers and people you know.

"The point is..." She takes a breath, trying to find the right words to say. She wanted to tread carefully, not wanting to accidentally say something wrong. You watch as she thinks, her words sinking into your mind.

"Don't blame yourself," She finally says, looking directly into your eyes to make sure you heard her completely and isn't lost in your head as she said it.

"The love was there, but you reached the end of it," she points out, unfaltering in her honesty, but her voice was gentle. The truth was, it was doomed from the start. You had it in the back of your head all the time. But there seemed to be such a high chance of it coming out alive from the beginning. Yet, all that was a simple trick your minds put on.

"But why did she...do that?" You ask hesitantly, your heart pained with cracks. You knew people did the things they wanted to, with a reason or not. But this was different. Kate purses her lips, a sigh leaving her mouth.

"Honestly, I'm not who you should be asking..." Kate says with a soft chuckle, a tinge of the sound having a nervous tone, but she needed to help you get out than dig yourself deeper.

"But maybe she didn't want to hurt you," She says with a gentle shrug. Her mind worried it was a bad thing to put out, but she sees your shoulders slumping in defeat.

"...But it did anyway." You sigh. It'll always hurt. Whether you'd like to admit it or not, no matter the ways its done in. She had nothing to say to that.

The two of you sit in quiet silence for a minute, needing the break to think. Lucky shifted slightly in his sleep, and Kate gently puts her fingers through his fur before looking at you once more, seeing your gaze lost in a haze of your thoughts.

"Now, come here." She lets go of Lucky and slowly pushes herself off the couch with her hands, standing up and turning to you. You raise your eyebrows at her, curious of her next moves.

"You're desperately in need of...a teddy bear hug!" She gently tugs on your arm, pulling you up to stand.

"Aw, no!" You joked with a chuckle as you get pulled into her embrace, her arms squeezing you tightly as if you were simply a plushie.

You hug her back though, relishing in the tight yet comforting embrace of her arms. Your body relaxed, feeling the weight on your shoulders slowly disappearing just slightly.

"Thank you." You say under your breath, pulling away from her. She slides her hands into her pockets, giving you a reassuring smile.

"It's what I'm here for." She said quietly with a nod, her eyes traveling over to the clock. Her mind jumps to the memory where you seemed sleepy, right in the car earlier.

"You should get some rest. Have you slept at all ever since you went to the airport?" She asks, nudging your shoulder with her knuckles. A faint thought of you in your worst times went through her mind just for a moment.

"No...but--" You look over to the tv screen, seeing you had just a quarter left to finish of the movie.

"Go," Kate says gently yet slightly sternly in a whisper, cutting you off. Lucky was already sleeping. She was still energized, but she could go to sleep at any time at the moment. Kate was just more concerned about you, hating to see you avoid taking care of yourself.

You look at her for a moment longer, your eyes flicking over to Lucky to think it over before giving in, your head moving in a gentle nod.

She gives you an encouraging smile, letting you go to your bedroom. As you did so, she started cleaning up, getting the plates from earlier and putting them in the sink. When she hears your bedroom door close, was when she could have her heart get just a tad lighter.

You make your way to your bed and turn the dim lights on, falling into bed easily. A sigh leaves your mouth, and you wanted to spill out your feelings, but all that was more on your mind was sleep.

The mattress was soft, and you wanted to sink into it, yet still, your head falls asleep after minutes of tossing and turning while the night delved deeper into a form of comfort.

|——————————— ᗢ ———————————|

Wanda, on the other hand, hasn't been sleeping at all. She kept thinking over the memories of the past few months. It was like a contest of who can act like they can care less. At first. Then, she saw your efforts and got guilty, wanting to isolate herself instead.

The day you were waiting at the café. She was going to actually have lunch with you. But the person she was with had convinced her to stay. Her heart screamed no, but her mind was far from it. She was already falling out of love with you, so what could it hurt?

It seemed like the right thing at the time for her, and it was easier for her to put the blame on herself than making you overthink about the smallest things and make yourself the villain instead. She didn't want to hurt you. Your heart was the softest she's seen. But she only ended up hurting you further. It was a situation that only had loss.

Then, the birthday was an actual mistake.

She thought it'd be nice to get a day off to herself...and with another, hoping you'll still believe that she was at work, although the both of you had doubted it by that point already. But she actually forgot.

Your past, she knows. How many people you've drifted off from and never really got one to stay or even stayed yourself. Then you met her, who was struggling to believe how anyone could love her. And you decided to stay. For once, you poured your whole heart into it because you promised yourself not to run anymore. For once, she had someone in her life that truly cared for her.

And she did that.

Her legs curl further into her body, the bed being colder than the nights before. Was this what you felt whenever you slept alone and she was off doing whatever?

Her chest caves in and her heart gives up, the walls whispering back to her of her quiet cries.

end of chapter 6. <3

Series Masterlist <- Chapter 5 Chapter 7 ->

----------------

taglist <3 - join here! :]

@ludasgf @lovelyy-moonlight @red1culous @justanotherteenpoet @fxckmiup @dmenby3100 @natashasilverfox @wandsmxmff @tia-thesimp @marvelwomen-simp @may-z3 @natsbiggestfan1 @fawnedolly @animealways

[devieuls]

The way of love pt.I

Neteyam Sully x Tayrangi Fem Reader (Na'vi)

Warning of the Serie: MDNI. Dom Neteyam x Fem Reader; SMUT; ANGST; FLUFF; Dirty Talk; Fangs; Bites; Blood; Spit; Power Play; Jealousy and Possessiveness; Foreplay; violence; Swearing; Teasing; Unprotected Sex; Enemies (because of you, Neteyam treats you well). Aged characters: Neteyam 19 y.o / You 18 y.o SERIE

Synopsis: After a great loss happened in your family, you are forced to take a role that before did not belong to you, following a path that you will feel like your only in time. Just when you thought you were finally overcoming the loss, your clan shows up with those you blame for the great offense received. You are the daughter of the first Olo'eykte of all clans and are about to take your mother’s place to lead the Tayrangi clan, but first you must follow Neteyam (the eldest son of the man you detest with all your heart) To train him, despite your contempt for the Sullys and everything about them, you inevitably bond with the boy, unknowingly falling in love with him.

CHAPTER WARNING: Just free hate for Neteyam from you.

Lenght : 2.1k

Notes: This series will be one of my biggest BOP or FLOP, it’s a long time I wanted to write about Neteyam because... GOSH, BUT YOU HAVE SEEN HIM?! BTW. All characters will keep the age difference but will be aged eg: Neteyam 19 y.o; Lo'ak 18 y.o etc…

" y/n te Skxumew Ikeyni'ite" is your surname, means Y/n surname daughter of Ikeyni

NA'VI WORDS: PARULTSYIP: Children. KARYU: Teacher. VRRTEP: Demon. IRAYO: Thank you. OARE: Moon. 'ITE: Daughter

PART: 1 ; 2 ; 3 ; 4 ; 5 ; 6 ; 7 ; 8 ; 9 ; 10

· · ─────── · 𖥸 · ─────── · ·

The first time the Sullys visited the Tayrangi clan, you were suspicious. You weren’t a big fan of Toruk Makto, there were rumors about him, rumors that you didn’t like him and that you were looking down on the Omatikaya family. Unlike your mother, the Olo'eykte Ikeyni, one of the few women to be clan leaders and Tsahik at the same time, you did not believe that you should be on the side of a man from another world. It also bothered you that the Sullys left their eldest son to be trained by your father, who, ironically, loved to teach young people the art of hunting.

You rolled your eyes as the girls of your clan looked at the son of Toruk Makto as if he were a living legend, a god among Na'vi, to you he was simply a na'vi with demon blood. You still remembered how your clan had offered shelter to the fleeing or homeless na'vi because of the war brought above all by the father of that Omatikayan. You growled slightly as the boy walked over to you, then turned around and walked away from him, taking a seat next to your parents, checking out the Sullys.

"My daughter. The future Olo'eykte of the Tayrangi Clan and healer of the village. She will be the guide of your son Neteyam, showing him the arts of this clan and our way." Your mother’s words stabbed you in the back, and you looked at her like it might change her mind, which it didn’t. You looked at your father, Tsentey, who, though he looked back, made you think he agreed with your mother.

You took a deep breath and walked away, trying to stay calm. You hated the idea of being the leader of that half-demon, but you couldn’t help but disobeying would put you in a position where the clan would look down on you and in Eywa’s eyes you would be undeserving to be Olo'eykte.

When evening came, your parents returned to your house and looked at you slightly disappointed.

"Ma 'ite… I know it's not something that brings joy to your heart, but it is your duty as next Olo'eykte" said your father, placing a hand on your shoulder, smiling gently, while your mother looked hard at you.

"There is no time for whims. This is the will of Eywa. An Olo'eykte is already weaker than an Olo'eyktan man. If you do not help the future Olo'eyktan of Omatikaya, someone else will and you will be just a Na'vi with a lower title" Your mother said, approaching you. " Ma 'ite. You are strong. You can do it and when the day comes, you will lead this clan, show them who you are" continued and then lifted your face from your chin. "You're a warrior. Remember who you are y/n te Skxumew Ikeyni'ite. You'll be the second Olo'eykte of all Pandora and everyone will know your name. More than Toruk Makto. But you have to make sacrifices, put pride aside. You have a goal Ma Oare" Your mother put her forehead on yours and you both closed your eyes, then nodded.

"I will." You said with conviction to see your mother smile, she was right. This was just one of the trials to reach your place in the clan.

The night passed quickly and the next day you were ready to face that demon blood, you just had to train him and then after a few months send him back to his house, to the Omatikaya. Your mother encouraged you when she saw you awake as you walked past the tree house, then headed to where Neteyam was staying, finding him already outside.

"Follow me." You hissed, then walked through the village to get out and into the woods. " What weapon can you use?" You continued without turning around to see where Neteyam was.

"Knives and Bows." He replied by keeping the pace "However I am-"

You stopped him, you stopped yourself, and then you turned around and looked him in the eye.

"I know who you are. Neteyam te Suli Tsyeyk'itan" You said to then observe it. " Bows and knives? Your arms are weak" You said approaching him, touching his arm. " Your chest tight, but you have a good posture." The boy watched you turn around and talk about him. "Do you have an Ikran?" You look him in the eye when you talk to him.

"Yes, I have one." His voice was still, as if the words you used didn’t hurt him at all.

"Can you swim?"

"Pretty good" Neteyam looked at you enchanted, smiling slightly

"Tsk. You’re like a parultsyìp. I have to teach you everything." You said sighing and then continued walking until you got to the cliff that provided a wonderful view of the sea.

"The Tayrangi clan is famous for being skilled riders of Ikran, the best. We interpret the wind, understand the sea and respect the great predators and the Ikran. You have to learn to fight with more weapons, to swim, to understand the wind and the animals that surround us" You said and then sit on the cliff, breathing in the fresh air.

"I’m here for this… what’s your name?" Neteyam’s voice was sweet as he sat next to you.

"You’re not here to make friends or get to know me. Call me Karyu." Your detached and disinterested voice made Neteyam smile, who already found you interesting.

"Karyu? So you won’t tell me your name?" he said, slightly laughing.

"Not relevant for training. Now silence. Listen to the wind"

That day you taught Neteyam the basics of understanding the wind, explaining in detail how to use this to fly better, to understand when it will start to rain or other natural events. The boy, different from what you thought, listened to you interested, asking questions and coming to understand what you were explaining. You couldn’t deny it.

"For today we are finished, tomorrow we will start with the proper guidance of the Ikran, the Omatikaya use strange methods to approach the banshees" You said, Going from the cliff and stretching you.

"Did I do well?" he asked curiously, as he stood up.

"Discreetly, you are not completely Skxawng." You shrugged, indifferent. " These are things that our children learn after a week. Half a day is something"

"Something? Does that mean I can now know your name?"

"No. Why do you care so much?" your voice was sore.

"Just curiosity" Neteyam smiled and approached you

"Hmm… if you can get back to the village before the eclipse, I’ll tell you my name. Good luck" You said, and then you went into the forest, going home alone, about an hour before the eclipse, it was impossible for her to return in time, not knowing the way back. You prayed that a Palulukan would tear him to pieces, not to have him back but you could not wish this on a son of Eywa, after all even a Palulukan deserved a better meal.

Some of your companions gathered to wait for Neteyam after hearing about that little challenge, you smiled satisfied when the eclipse came and Neteyam was not back yet. " What if he’s dead?" " Maybe he found a Palulukan." "Or he got lost" Voices like this filled the air, you shrugged and turned to leave. At that moment you heard the girls cheering and shouting the name of Neteyam happy, seeing him unharmed.

You turned and looked him in the eye, after all he still lost the challenge, so the victory belonged to you. Neteyam came up with a flower.

"There’s already been an eclipse. You lost, so I don't-" You stopped when Neteyam put the flower behind your ear, smiling at seeing you with it in your hair.

"I would have won, but I saw this Sun Lily and it reminded me of your eyes, so I looked for the most beautiful, wasting time" He said smiling, shrugging. " I’ll discover your name one day, ma Karyu"

You observed him without saying anything, you did not expect such a thing. He had preferred to lose the challenge to pick a flower to give you and did not seem upset by this, indeed, he smiled carelessly. You did not understand at that moment why your heart accelerated the beat, or why you did not immediately remove the flower, or why now you looked at it without disgust or repugnance. You recovered from your thoughts when you heard some girls being jealous of you for that little gesture made by Prince Omatikaya. You clenched your jaw and looked at him.

"You still lost." you said with the little coolness you had left.

"I did, but does it matter?" He replied promptly, and then continued, "It was worth it, the flower suits you very well."

You bit the inside of your cheek and then you turned around and left "See you tomorrow." You said dryly before saying goodbye and going home.

"She’s beautiful, isn’t she?" Neteyam said to some of the clan’s boys.

"Bro, shs's the type of na'vi who eats you alive." one of the guys laughed.

"I know, and I like it." Neteyam concluded

You reported to your mother and she immediately noticed the flower in your hair.

"It’s very nice, where did you get it?" she asked, placing the flower in your hair.

"Just a stupid gift." You confessed before you took it off and left it in your mother’s hand, going to a more secluded place on one of the tree branches.

"skxawng. just a vrrtep skxawng." You said to yourself while leaning your body against the tree. " Ma Eywa, please, Great mother, make sure he learns quickly and walks away." You asked as you watched the starry sky. " Give me a sign to bear him, because he’s a vrrtep," you said before you heard a woodsprite landing on the same ear where Neteyam’s flower used to be and then seeing it not far under the tree where you were sitting. You felt mocked, Eywa today was having fun putting everything against you, otherwise you won’t explain these coincidences.

The coup de grâce came when the branch broke, dropping you into Neteyam’s arms. If you could confirm that, Eywa was trying to make you do all these things. You sighed annoyed, crossing your arms when Neteyam looked at you to see if you were okay.

"Are you hurt? Is everything okay?" he asked concerned, checking you and clutching you accidentally.

"You can let me go. I’m fine." You answered a little sour.

"A thank you is welcome, Princess Tayrangi," Neteyam laughed, and then left you standing on the ground, watching you.

"Irayo…" you whispered quietly, turning your head to the side

"I don’t understand, can you repeat?" he said smiling

"what a skxawng…" you whispered softly. " I said Irayo." This time you said fast

"I still don’t understand, I really think you’ll have to repeat it," Neteyam laughed a little.

"Are you- Irayo." You said it out loud so he’d get it in his head, and then he’d snort right after.

"You are even more beautiful when you get angry, you know?" he said spontaneously, leaning against the tree, admiring your beauty.

You swirled your eyes, restraining yourself from splitting his nasal septum or something, but for the umpteenth time Eywa sent a signal, a woodsprite on Neteyam’s shoulder. You looked up and laughed frustrated.

"Listen carefully, I don’t know why my path is intertwined with yours. I don’t want to put up with you any more than I have to. This means that if you see me falling from a tree, let me fall, if you find flowers that remind you of me, leave them where they are, if you see me for the village avoid me" You said pointing your finger at Neteyam’s chest. "The only thing keeping me from completely avoiding you is my title and my parents. You’d be meal for Palulukan if it were up to me."

Neteyam opened his mouth to speak but you stopped him. "Don’t answer, it’s already decided. Learn quickly, I want you out of this village and away from me or my people. I don’t know why my parents sympathize with your family, but I don’t agree with them. Now, if you understand that you have to stay as far away from me as possible, nod."

The boy nodded, smiling amused, watching you get nervous.

"Good. See you tomorrow Neteyam." You said saying goodbye a second time to go home.

At that moment, all you wanted was for Neteyam to disappear, him and his manners, and take away that beautiful smile and those golden eyes. Fuck, no. You don’t have to think about it. You hate him, you hate his family, you must hate him… Do you hate him?

[devflamme]

ok. wtf was that episode. lemme breathe for a second. i took so many screenshots. i have so many things to say. my knee hurts so bad and this happens all the time i watch a new episode. i think its my anxiety acting up

agatha all along spoilers below 🫵

so, first things first. i think im gonna do probably 3 posts. i have TOO MANY SCREENSHOTS and ANNOTATIONS, and i want to talk about every single one of them. ALSO, i did most of my annotations while watching the brazilian dub of the show (after watching the original three times) so some lines may be a little different from the original.

- the way jen and lilia were just gossiping about alice when she was right beside them just broke me into laughter, actually. theyre so weird.

- even though im a firm believer of the "agatha never went down the road" theory, this screenshot speaks louder than my beliefs. agatha went down and was the only one who survived. she probably didnt even help that much during the trials and just let everyone die like the "undeserving witches" they probably were in her eyes. still wanna know if agatha sees everyone in her current coven (created by pure pressure) as deserving of their power. her pep talk to jen in the third episode spoke lots to me.

- i love the way that jen and agatha fight ALL the time and that makes them very siblings coded to me (i dont have anything against shipping them, its just not my cup of tea) and also the way that she talks to lilia - its gentler than she does normally. she is softening up, little by little, and i love that. i know that most people do like agatha more as a villain/grey character, but i would love to see more soft moments of her, just like in this episode.

- goober. just wanted to say that

- this sequence right here just made me BREAK into a cackle. rio giving agatha a flower, calling her "my lady" while agatha just wanted to rip her head off and give it for scratchy to eat. theyre so cute! i want what they have!

- The Goobers. this episode was SO made for me, the biggest agatha&teen connoisseur out there. the way that teen followed agatha because he recognized rio and noticed how uncomfortable and angry agatha was in that moment. even though he was a little annoying, calling rio CHARISMATIC in front of AGATHA, he was still gentle, knowing that their relationship was, well, fucked up. love him a lot.

- found family but they all fucking hate each other. but they also love teen. god i could spend hours talking about them.

- another thing. the Ballad and the Road have a different order. "gather witches, fire, water, earth and air". in my head, the trials are: water as the first, fire as the second, air as the third, earth as the fourth. this makes sense because:

jen's trial was the water trial, the first. alice's trial was the fire trial, the second. lilia's trial is the air trial, the third. but the fourth trial is teen's (if im not wrong), so it does not make too much sense if his trial is earth-themed. even so im dropping this here. feel free to correct me in the replies 🫡

and now i have to make another post because i can't put any more pics. shit

[licorice-tea]

Loving and Letting Go

Pairing: Vinsmoke Sanji x reader

Content: Angst, hurt/comfort, eventually fluff, a little bit of platonic Zosan <3

Word Count: 1.6k

A/N: FIRST REQUEST YAY! tysm to the anon who requested this, i loved writing this! hopefully it fits what you wanted! and ugh i tried to write it so it’s clear that sanji is genuinely in love for the reader, so much so that he’s willing to grow and change for them. he’s just so sweet, one of my fave characters for sure! oh also the title is from a song by Pham Viphurit! enjoy <3

Sanji loves you, so so so much. More than he could ever put into words, or cards and gifts of perfectly delicious meals and fruity drinks, or even hugs and kisses every time the two of you cross paths. But he still tries to convey the extent of his feelings for you, though it will never be enough in his humble opinion.

You, on the other hand, hold the complete opposite opinion. Yes, Sanji is sweet and loving and a great boyfriend, but sometimes he just does too much. Like, when he gives you presents out of the blue; you enjoyed the gifts at first, but overtime you started to feel bad for him spending all of his extra money on you. Then there were the things he’d say to you; you could be doing the most mundane of tasks, or be sick and rotting in bed, and Sanji would still address you as “my goddess.” Simply put, you feel undeserving of the amount of attention he gives you, and it makes you nervous.

Today, like everyday since the two of you became official (and quite a while before that), you wake up in his arms. Though Sanji wakes up much earlier than you in order to prepare breakfast and coffees and teas for the crew, he always makes time to come back and wake you up. And you know, as soon as you shuffle or allow your breathing to become uneven, that he’ll know you’re awake. So you try to fall back asleep in hopes he’ll just go and let you wake up alone. At least then your performance wont have to start until breakfast.

Unfortunately, Sanji just knows you too well. He notices the gentle flutter of your lashes and how your breathing had quickened, if only for a moment. Some people might consider this a luxury; to have such an attentive partner who knows you better than you know yourself. And you did too, at one point.

“Mon amour,” he whispers, “are you awake? I brought you a cup of coffee, and breakfast is ready in the kitchen.”

Sanji’s breath is warm on the back of your neck, but he places a kiss there and suddenly it’s burning hot. He’s so insatiable, smothering you in displays of affection first thing in the morning.

You really can’t take it anymore, and so you gently remove the arm that lays across you. “Go away, Sanji.” It comes off harsher than intended, but the buildup of stress from his constant admiration has reached its peak.

“…Are you ok? Are you sick?”

You sigh, still not turning to face him. “I’m fine, I just… you need to let me be.”

“Angel, have I done something? I’ll make it up to you, I swear, name what you want-“

“I want you to go away.”

Sanji holds his breath for a moment. You’re wounding him with your words, which you should feel bad for, but he’s literally giving you a headache. He doesn’t understand that even you, usually so accepting and reciprocating of all his love, have limits and require space.

He retracts his arms from around you and slips out of the bed, making sure to fix the comforter after. Sanji’s hand lingers on the door knob for a moment before he finally turns it. And while you let out a relieved, but shaky exhale, he tries to hold back tears on the other side of the door.

The tension between you two is palatable as ever. Not that there isn’t always some sort of tension, because there is, but usually it’s more… passionate. Or romantic, at the very least. But for the first time, the rest of the crew can tell that you and Sanji seem to be in the middle of some sort of lovers quarrel. He watches you from a distance and attempts to approach you several times throughout the course of the day, and every time you find some way to make yourself busy.

Even Zoro, in all his obliviousness, notices how little you two are interacting. “Hey, shitty cook.”

“Piss off, Zoro. I’m not in the mood for your stupidity.”

“Trouble in paradise?”

“Excuse me?”

“Ya know, with you and y/n. She’s avoiding you, so… What’d you do?”

“I DIDN’T-“ Sanji catches himself yelling, and takes a deep breath. “I don’t know. She just told me to leave her alone, and I’m respecting her wishes.”

“Huh. Well, alright then.”

Zoro doesn’t speak further, but Sanji can tell he has something to say since he’s still sitting at the kitchen island instead of taking his sake to enjoy on the deck. “What? Just spit it out already, asshole.”

He shrugs. “You’re probably suffocating her with all your… love-y shit.”

“Suffocating? No, no I treat her the way she deserves to be treated. Y/n is my goddess, my night and day, she is the queen of my heart and-“

“You see what I mean? Y/n is great or whatever, but she’s a human. She’s one of our crewmates, for fucks sake, and you worship the ground she walks on instead of treating her like one.”

“Because I love her.”

“She knows you love her, idiot.”

“… Hm. You think so?”

“It’s pretty fucking obvious.”

Sanji scoffs. “Whatever.”

He walks out of the kitchen with his hands in his pockets, but mind elsewhere. Perhaps Zoro… is right? Even that doesn’t sound possible, but… Sanji could understand how you might, on occasion, feel a little smothered. But even if you did, he thought you enjoyed it! You always welcomed his lips on yours or his hands around you, and you often would giggle and accept his compliments, returning them with your own. So when did you start to feel fed up with him? Had he not paid you enough attention, too caught up in worshipping you as the (surprisingly emotionally intelligent) swordsman had said? And most importantly, was it too late now to repair the damage?

Sanji finds you in the aquarium bar, finally, after searching the upper deck and checking your room and your study below deck. The door is open, so he knocks against the frame. You turn away from the tank to look at him with eyes wide open.

“Can we talk?”

You nod silently, and scoot over in the booth seat assuming that he would want to sit by you. But to your (pleasant?) surprise, Sanji takes a seat in a chair on the other side of the table.

“Mon- ahem, y/n. I’ve come to understand that maybe… Maybe you’ve felt smothered by me, recently. Is that true?”

You’re surprised that he recognizes why you’re upset. “Mhm. A little.”

“Can you tell me more, my love? I want to fix this, to fix my behavior.”

“…You’re perfect, Sanji. And I love you so much, it’s just… It makes me anxious when you’re always so- so extreme, you know?”

“What do you mean?” Which, he already knows; the gifts, the constant PDA, being around you 24/7…

You sigh. “You know what I mean, Sanji…”

“Yes, I do, but I don’t want it to be true. I don’t want you to feel bad because of me.” He thinks.

“You’re always hovering over me, and as much as I love being around you, too, it’s just too much. I need space, sometimes, and I’m only human but you treat me like… Like I’m somehow different or better than the others, and that… I don’t know, it makes me feel bad about myself.”

“I never want you to feel that way-“

“But you do. I feel guilty and nervous and- and..” you sniffle. Oh god, you’re crying. “I love you, but sometimes it’s too much.”

Sanji feels tears pricking the in the corners of his eyes, too. Was there really such a thing as too much affection? Clearly, if he had just made you cry from all of it.

“Y/n… I- I’m so sorry, I never meant to overwhelm you.”

You respond with an equally soft tone. “I know. It’s ok.”

He shakes his head and reaches an arm across the table, but second guessed the action and retracts his hand. “It’s not. I shouldn’t have ever done anything to make you uncomfortable in the first place.

You reach out this time, putting one hand over both of his. He glances up at you. “You didn’t know.”

“Still….”

“In the future, maybe… Maybe try to do a little less, if that makes sense?”

Sanji nods, and reaches out again; this time to wipe the tears from your cheeks. “I just love you so much, y/n.”

“I love you too.”

While cradling your face in one hand, he continues. “I’ll give you more space from now on, if that’s what will make you feel better.”

“I think it will.”

And it does. In the coming days, Sanji keeps the PDA to a minimum, and even makes a point to call you by your name more often than he addresses you as “my goddess.” It makes you feel more seen, and definitely more comfortable.

You still want him to hold you most nights. It’s hard to fall asleep without his arms around you after so long getting used to the feeling of him; his love, his protection, his dedication and his breath. And of course, Sanji still indulges you. The great, passionate love he has for you hasn’t gone away- it never will- but the way he shows you affection are more so on your terms now.

Besides: what greater way could there be to show you his love, than by doing everything in his power to make you happy?

[evolutionsbedingt]

WIP Wednesday

The He Xuan ascended after all fic (I really should come up with a better title than that) took a turn for the angstier and I decided to inflict the pain on you for this lovely WIP Wednesday! <3

Previous parts

★★★

He Xuan breathed a sigh of relief when Ling Wen concluded the meeting and yelped when he looked up to find Hua Cheng sitting right next to his desk, cheek leaned on his fist and his eyes fixed on He Xuan. Immediately he felt tense again and busied himself with putting his desk back into order. 

“So He-dafang saw Dianxia two hundred years ago,” Hua Cheng remarked, studiously calm voice offset by the glint of anger in his eye. 

He Xuan realised that he was back to wearing his true form and he wished he could feel that it was a show of trust. Instead, it felt more like a warning, a reminder what Hua Cheng was capable of if He Xuan should dare to upset him. 

“Why did you not tell me about a cultivator who didn’t age visiting your shrines?” Hua Cheng asked, his fingers tapping impatiently on He Xuan’s desk and leaving small, charred pits behind. 

He Xuan stood from his seat, dropping to his knees before Hua Cheng, and pressed his forehead to the ground. “This unskilled scribe deserves to die for keeping Tanhua-jun from his beloved for two more centuries. I should not have failed to recognise him or his immortality. Tanhua-jun must punish me severely.”

The biting tip of Eming came to rest against the juncture of He Xuan’s throat and shoulder, dragging up slowly and forcing his head along. Warm blood trickled in its path and He Xuan could tell that the resentment of that blade was lapping it up. He understood with some horror that Eming at least considered him to be an enemy of Hua Cheng’s now. His heart froze from the inside out and cracked, indubitably about to shatter if it were to encounter another blow.

It took more courage than usual to meet Hua Cheng’s eye and when he did, there was a red glow to it that only appeared when Hua Cheng was truly incensed. 

“Tell me, did you hide it purposefully so you could keep me to yourself? After all, it’s only through my support that word of your cult spread throughout the plains and beyond.” He leaned in, Eming digging dangerously into the soft underside of He Xuan’s jaw. “Or did you want to keep him to yourself? Do you think you’re better than me? Taizi Dianxia would never choose rubbish like us. You may be a god, but your hands are just as stained by sin as mine.”

He Xuan knew Hua Cheng. He knew the deep-seated fear of being a monster, of being detestable and undeserving of love. He knew that it must be Hua Cheng’s fear driving him to say these things and yet his heart shattered under the onslaught. His apology had meant nothing to Hua Cheng and he’d lost centuries of trust, simply because he’d failed to realise that the white-clothed cultivator was special. He Xuan wanted to cry, but his body refused to let him seek that relief. It was something that hadn’t happened since he was freed from Water Manor and He Xuan recognised it for what it was: a sign that he too had lost his trust in Hua Cheng now. 

Closing his eyes, He Xuan said, “This unskilled scribe would not dare to interfere with fate like that and his failure to do what was asked of him is unforgivable. Tanhua-jun’s happiness is most important to him.” Calling forth the arrays protecting his house from unwanted visitors, He Xuan raised a trembling hand to pluck four characters out of the array. It felt like he was ripping out his own veins, the power in them pulsing like a heartbeat as they dissipated, and when he opened his eyes, Hua Cheng was nowhere to be seen. 

The next thing He Xuan did was to change his private communication array password and then he sent his cats hunting for the butterflies the array may not have been able to excise while he took down the distance-shortening array to Paradise Manor in the pantry. 

He hesitated over the black butterfly that still fluttered around with Hua Cheng’s flock and finally couldn’t bring himself to destroy it. He closed his mind to it though and, summoning his blade, He Xuan descended into the mortal realm without so much as a word of goodbye to Xie Lian. 

Wrapping the scabbard of his blade in rags and dampening talismans, he followed the mountain road he’d landed on and did not allow his thoughts to stray anywhere other than the vibrant nature and harmonious bird calls surrounding him. He slept under the stars, his mind shut to any connection the heaven may try to make to him, and when he rose in the morning he decided to wander for… a while. His methods may not be orthodox, but cultivators were always needed and people in need were rarely picky about where the help came from.

[tiredphilosophist]

my roman empire

⟡ my roman empire is zhongli and childe.

i would like to think it's not all about mora for zhongli. he's a lonely, old man who has lived for several millennia, losing his one love many years ago to the vicious grasp of a war. he yearns to fall softly into the palms of mortal ethos; he wants to love again, reminisce again. he wants to experience the beautiful thing it is to live and to die. ⟡ then, ajax surprisingly and suddenly comes into his life. characterised by a cocky and silly attitude, childe's wit and charm pulls zhongli's attention in a whirlwind of unexpected feelings. he suddenly finds himself indulged within this little bundle of mischief and life- and god, it makes him feel alive. he relishes within childe's irresistible bright spirits and insatiable courage and grit. it was like bathing in sunlight after an age of dull, quiet times. ⋆｡𖦹° tartaglia, on the other hand; you'd assume he gets a little annoyed at zhongli's horrible spending habits and tantalising stories, whipping out his wallet every time they went shopping together at the markets. although, his countless tales and overflowing knowledge amused him greatly. (and seeing zhongli's eyes light up at the smallest of trinkets, from an average cor lapis to a new feather pen; it made it all worth it.) ⟡ in all honesty though, childe really did enjoy it. he loved to sit with his cheek in his palm, listening to zhongli ramble on about countless old legends and memories, the history of his nation, his poetic craft of stringing liyue's history into a painting within one's head... the food growing cold upon the table- but oh, who cares? zhongli looked so peaceful and happy whenever he talked about the past, his eyes glazed over in this pretty reminiscence- even if his dinner had barely been touched. besides, it's not like childe couldn't afford to purchase all the hot meals in the world to keep the time passing... ⟡ with his brutal past behind him, zhongli felt that childe's cocky personality was just a front. when they were alone, he would notice childe gazing longingly at the flowered fields and toppled mountains of liyue, its bubbling brooks and ponds, dappled within spots of hazy, afternoon light. "this peacefulness," he would say quietly to zhongli, who would walk beside him. "it reminds me of home; schneznaya." zhongli would smile then, and reach out to hold his hand. he understood the pains of homesickness; for a time and place that no longer was. ⋆｡𖦹° ⟡ tartaglia, misunderstood from birth and thrown into the brutalities of the abyss by mistake; he had always felt like the only real thing that fed his insatiable hunger for bloodshed and victory was fighting. more and more fighting, and killing, and battles, and war. although, there lied a real war within his heart and mind; one where he felt conflicted between peace and ignorance. he often wondered if continuing this tiring life of chasing that high that could only be fulfilled with a fiesty battle and a few wounds was worth it- wondered if he really did simply have no other worth, but to be an asset of war, loyal to the tsaritsa. but he found that zhongli changed this; his unbridled knowledge, his effortless patience and wisdom and timeless company... he found himself letting go around the man; feeling so at ease and safe, too. like he could finally stop fighting, even if for a moment. maybe there really was something more to live for. ⋆｡𖦹° tl;dr: childe and zhongli is that one trope where one feels they are too hard to love or undeserving of love, but the other loves them as easily as it is to breathe. i'll let you decide who is who...! thanks for reading if you did. this is my first post; i have no idea how tumblr works, but i wanna use this platform as a place to dump all my silly headcannons and stories of my favourite silly goofy ficitional characters. ⟢

[sky-fire-forever]

So. A lot of people think those of us who dislike Izzy's death just hate character deaths or tragedy or whatever. I am here to say that that is ABSOLUTELY not the case. Not for me

I fucking love tragedy. I am a known tragedy enjoyer. I love it when my favorite characters die and I get to be sad about it. I have loved tragedy since I was a child. A Series of Unfortunate Events was one of my all time favorite book series. I love it when important characters die and the story makes you sad about it!

I am going to use a comparison here that I haven't seen anyone else use

So, for a long time, my favorite television show ever was BBC's Merlin. It's a silly comedy with dramatic elements, but it is first and foremost a comedy. Just like Our Flag Means Death. It's ridiculously goofy and silly and 99% of the time, the characters are just joking around and things that would kill people in real life are brushed off as jokes. It's fun!

And spoiler alert for a show that ended like a decade ago:

Characters die in Merlin! Despite it being a comedy at its core, really important characters die. Characters we like die and so do villains, be them sympathetic or otherwise. A lot of characters we grow to know and love die and they die tragically.

But I fucking LOVE Merlin and it's still one of my favorite shows ever. Because whenever a character dies in Merlin, their death is FELT. They get deaths worthy of their characters. You feel the loss and the show takes time to stop being a comedy for a moment to let the audience and the characters mourn.

We see Merlin cry over Lancelot, burdened by the grief of knowing he sacrificed himself for him. We see Gwen grieve the deaths of both her father and her brother. We even get to watch people grieve over Uther, a villain who has gotten in the way of so much, because the narrative acknowledges he was a person who people loved despite his cruel actions.

All of this in a show where the main characters call each other "clotpole" and where Arthur doesn't notice levitating keys right above his head! It's a comedy! A silly, silly show. But death still MATTERS when it happens and I actually adore the character deaths in this show! Even when it's my favorite characters!

Izzy doesn't get the respect the characters in Merlin did when he dies. It's glossed over, rushed through. Even at his funeral, no one seems genuinely sad. There is no time to slow down and watch anyone actually process his death because we have to hurry on to Pete and Lucius getting married.

I do think the show being cut is to blame for this. With more time, we might have had more room to breathe, to grieve. We could have time to process and to let the characters process

But we don't get that and it's a shame! It's a shame that Izzy's death feels so pointless and undeserving and meaningless! It's a shame we get no time to process his death! It's a shame the characters barely react to his death outside of the scene in which he dies! It's genuinely such a shame that Izzy's death leaves me feeling hollow instead of sad. If I felt sad, I'd like Izzy's death a lot more. But I'm not sad. I'm just so disappointed that that's how it played out

I wish I could feel sad over Izzy's death because I genuinely enjoy feeling sad over characters. But I'm not.

[softjunk01]

The Akarikage:

Chapter 1 - Listen to the Wind

CHAPTER SUMMARY: Character introduction of Namikaze Naruto. Trigger Warning: Violence and blood

Tension rolled off from Namikaze Naruto’s shoulders once the applause filled the halls of the Jōryoku Elementary School gymnasium (the temporary auditorium for the current event) as he, his classmates, and the rest of the graduating classes, made their way outside in an orderly fashion. Homeroom teachers followed them behind.

            Finally. The end of the ceremony. And the final curtain to their elementary days.

            With every step, excitement flowed over the anxiety Naruto was holding onto for a while now, and an unexpected feeling of pride swelled within his chest, coursing its way through his system.

            But of course, he was proud; he was walking down the aisle with his friends and classmates, diplomas in hand. He was sharing this important milestone with everyone while the rest looked up at them with smiles and nods of encouragement. This was their moment; their last leg to the finish line; until the next race. Junior high, here I come, ‘ttebayo!

            The applause continued. And Naruto had never felt this way before. He didn’t feel short, or left behind, or undeserving. He didn’t feel like an outcast in desperate need to stand out. He was equal with all of his classmates. For the moment, at least.

For right now, everyone’s attention was on them. On him. Which was a first for him, really.

Recognition. It was… riveting; and almost too good to be true to last, so he soaked it all up and welcomed the foreign feeling before it was gone.

            Naruto passed by a few schoolmates, those in the lower grades who smiled and waved at him with those same bittersweet gazes he and his friends had been receiving since graduation practices began. A few parents of his friends and Itachi-nīchan—his best friend’s older brother—acknowledged him. And even Ichiraku’s shop owner, Teuchi-occhan, who had been a long-time friend, was here. Naruto grinned back at all of them—so much so, that his eyes were closing.

            In his exhilarated state, he didn’t realize he stopped in his tracks, until one of his friends, Nara Shikamaru, who was behind him, gave his shoulder a light shove. “Come on,” his voice was dragging, “you’re holding up the line.”

            With a small grunt, Naruto slanted him a look of annoyance and moved along, his mood dampening a bit. That guy had been complaining for hours, way before they received their diplomas, it was exhausting. And they were seated next to each other. The whole time (and half of their elementary years together in class).

            Outside, the air of midmorning spring greeted Naruto with a warm embrace, a last send-off to the next stage of his life. Because this was it, he knew—his childhood was coming to an end. It was as if the wind itself was quietly congratulating him, accompanied by the yellow rays of sunlight beaming down on him and everyone else. It was contagious.

            He breathed in and smiled up at the sky. Tōchan, Kāchan, I made it. 

            In his heart, Naruto believed his late parents were watching somewhere above. He could feel them, sometimes. He might not have known who they were, but he knew they loved him. And he was going to make them proud. Just wait and see.

            His body felt light, his entire being unexplainably bursting with energy, even when they just finished a four-hour graduation ceremony with boring songs and speeches.

            He looked around for his friends.

            As usual, the sight of them with their families triggered the loneliness in him. There would be a twinge in his chest every time he saw them interact with one another, happiness on their faces. He longed for people he could call home. And he wanted parents he could brag and complain about. He was used to this, though. Being left out on most things. On the upside, he made a lot of friends, which helped a lot. But still.

            When Naruto scanned the crowd once again to find more of those friends, he caught sight of someone familiar to him. He was smiling again before he called out to them. “Occhan!”

            Teuchi turned his head. His features relaxed and beamed in recognition as Naruto ran to his side. “Naruto! There you are.” He let out a small chuckle. “I was afraid you went straight home.”

            “You came!” Naruto exclaimed, still smiling. He had mentioned the graduation ceremony in passing the other day when he was eating ramen at the old man’s shop, Ichiraku’s, and now found himself wondering if the latter actually remembered that. He was even dressed for the occasion.

            “I had to,” Teuchi sighed in reflection, straightening his black coat. “I thought about it a lot last night and decided to come after all. I couldn’t miss the chance of seeing you walk up that stage to get your diploma.”

            A small blush appeared on Naruto’s cheeks from his admission. He scratched the back of his head, because how was he supposed to respond to that? It was… an affectionate gesture, as far as he was concerned, and Naruto wasn’t used to receiving that.

            “You did well up there, kid,” Teuchi told him, erasing the haze of memories. “And all your friends, too. Omedeto,” he congratulated. “You’re going to junior high school now.”

            Naruto straightened and bowed a little. “Arigatō.” He raised his head and looked up at Teuchi, asking, “But what about the shop?” He couldn’t imagine leaving it to those two apprentices of his, Matsu and Nishi. They were rookies and, well, they were a little bit clumsy, but dedicated.

            “Oh, don’t worry about that for now,” Teuchi brushed off with a hand. “I can open up later.” So, he doesn’t trust those two, after all, Naruto thought with a sweat drop. “Say,” he continued, crossing his arms in thought, “why don’t you bring your sensei later and I’ll whip you a few batches for free. How’s that sound?”

            Naruto’s ears perked up at the tempting suggestion, making him stand in attention. “Really? For free?”

            Teuchi nodded with a kind smile. “Yep. Consider it your graduation gift from me. Besides,” his expression softened, “you’re one of our most loyal customers, so you’re no stranger.”

            “That’s awesome, ‘ttebayo!” Naruto couldn’t help the little jump he made, his free hand forming an excited fist. Then, he started muttering to himself. “Maybe I can ask for extra pork and beef and a boiled egg.” He paused. “Or two.” He snickered, too enthusiastic to contain himself. “Oh boy! I can’t wait!”

            After a few more exchanged words, a teacher took their photo and they parted ways. Teuchi had a lot of acquaintances around, and he wanted to greet them before leaving.

            He was just about to run off and go to his friends and congratulate them, when something tingled on the back of his neck. Gooseflesh prickled his skin.

            Someone is watching —his instinct told him.

            This didn’t immediately register when Naruto turned around and glanced about the crowd.

            The wind changed. A cold breeze swept by, ruffling his blonde hair, parting one side of his dark blue coat and blowing against his necktie. What is this… bad feeling?

            All of the graduate students, along with their parents and guardians mingled in the open courtyard, greeting one another and sharing congratulations (almost everyone was wearing dark blue, as decided for the color code weeks ago for the graduates and the clothes they were to wear and match with—suit and tie for the boys and hakama and a jacket for the girls). Naruto spotted some of his friends—Sakura and Ino were laughing together while their parents talk; Lee was having—another—tearful moment with his father, a tight grip on his diploma; and Shikamaru (yawning) and Chōji (frowning and rubbing his rumbling stomach) were standing side by side while they waited on their parents, who were also busy conversing.

            No one stood out. Nobody was looking at Naruto.

            He lifted his gaze to the school building beyond the courtyard. Out of habit, he turned to the window of his classroom first. His back straightened and his eyebrows knitted slightly.

            Over there. 

            That unsettling feeling in his gut surfaced in full force. Somebody was in there. Naruto had no explanation for it, he just knew.

            The longer he stared up at the window, the more anxious he felt.

            Before Naruto could do anything about it, someone pounced on him from behind and grabbed his shoulder, giving him a rough shove before putting an arm around his neck. He, in turn, yelped in surprise and almost jumped out of his skin.

            “Yo!”

            Great. It was his friend, Inuzuka Kiba. “What’s with the glum face, Naruto? We just graduated. Have you forgotten to eat your ramen this morning?” he taunted. The bastard.

            Naruto scowled at the brown-haired boy. “Kiba, you jerk! You almost gave me a heart attack, ‘ttebayo!”  

            Kiba only gave him a grin that showed his white teeth and laughed. “Come on, let’s go. The auditorium’s all cleared. We can go back in now,” he said and proceeded to drag Naruto by the neck with his arm.

            “Ah, o-oi! Wait! Just hold on!” Naruto tried to get away—careful not to drop his diploma—but was only pulled forward. “Oi, Kiba!” His whine and protests were ignored and drowned out by the increase of voices chatting noisily as they re-entered the auditorium.

            He gave the school building one last glance and decided to let his curiosity go. Besides, that bad feeling dissipated the moment Kiba appeared. Must have been his imagination again or something. He had been wrong before.

 “Who is it?” asked Sakura from behind the door after Naruto rang the doorbell. He was carrying a plastic of sweet dango in his hand that he bought earlier.

            After eating at Ichiraku’s with his sensei, Umino Iruka, where they exchanged stories from their time as teacher and student (and Naruto had seven bowls of ramen), Naruto decided to buy some dango and swing by Sakura’s before he went over to Sasuke’s. The food stall around the corner of Ichiraku’s street was Sakura’s favorite because they made their sauce with the right amount of sweetness that she liked. This became a habit of his whenever he eats at Ichiruaku’s.

            There was a click before the door opened, and right there stood Haruno Sakura. She immediately grimaced and covered her nose with a hand. “Ah, Naruto. You smell like beef.”

            Naruto made a gleeful noise through his wide grin. “I just got back from Ichiraku’s. Occhan gave me ramen for free. So, how’s it going, dattebayo?”

            He was ushered in by Sakura who closed the door behind him. He took off his shoes.

            Sakura put her hands on her hips, making her appear more mature as she tried to scold him. “Don’t tell me you went overboard again and ate more than three bowls. That isn’t healthy, you know.”

            Giving her a carefree smile, Naruto discarded the idea. “Don’t worry about it.” He handed over the plastic of dango. “Here you go. I bought some on the way.”

            Sakura looked taken a back for a bit before finally accepting the sweets. He was rewarded with a smile. “Thank you, Naruto.”

            Naruto couldn’t help but blush—he always did.

            Since their first semester together on the first grade, Naruto had such a huge crush on the pinkette. He didn’t remember exactly when it happened, but one morning, he woke up and found himself completely smitten over Haruno Sakura.

            With her long pink hair and bright green eyes, even her seemingly wide forehead that others taunted her about, she looked like a deity walking among mere humans like him. She was so beautiful and cute and compassionate. Even after she learned… everything about him and the others, she didn’t get scared and run away like he expected her to. No. In fact, she would constantly remind him to be careful, just because she didn’t want him to get in trouble with his guardians.

            How could Naruto not like her?

            He once tried asking her out on a date—last year, maybe?—but she had refused. Whenever he would show her his affections, she would ignore them and tell him to buzz off. She had told him on numerous occasions that she didn’t feel that way about him and that he should give up. That time, he ignored her.

            Yes, he was relentless, but so was their friend, Rokku Rī, and Naruto wouldn’t let the athletic maniac win no matter what.

            “Seriously.” Sakura huffed. Naruto heard her footsteps following him on his way to their kitchen. He had been here plenty of times in the past that he was comfortable enough to walk around on his own. “One of these days, an ambulance is going to come get you for kidney or heart failure, so don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

            “Haaai.” He paused and looked around and noticed food ingredients scattered about on the table and countertops. “So, um… a-are you making dinner?” He hoped his question didn’t sound discouraging—even though half of his mind was whispering for him to do so—he just couldn’t help but feel bad.

            To Naruto, Sakura was already perfect. She was the prettiest and the smartest of them all!

            But he had to realize sooner or later that she wasn’t an actual deity walking among them and that she couldn’t cook to save her life.

            There was this one time when they were hanging out and others decided to bring food. Sakura being Sakura, brought her own homemade dish to the gathering and it was terrible. Immediately, they all spat out whatever it was she created. Chōji was an exception—he was, instead, vomiting his internal organs out (since as usual, the muncher overdid it and took a mouthful of that concoction).

            Sakura placed the plastic of dango on the kitchen table next to a chopping board with diced vegetables on them. “Kāchan went out to buy more potatoes and soy sauce. She just asked me to prepare the ingredients.”

            Naruto was internally relieved to hear that. Last year, the girl attempted to cook another dish and forced a select few unfortunate souls in her group of friends to try them. One of those poor souls being Naruto.

            He pushed away the unpleasant memory and sat down on one of the wooden chairs. Sakura did the same, and they began to talk about the earlier events from the graduation ceremony while they eat their sweet dango. They exchanged random stories about their childhood together, stories that brought out nostalgia and a bittersweet feeling about a phase of their lives coming to an end. Before Naruto could voice out his inner feelings about those, Sakura started to rant about Ino. Something about her taking a picture with Sasuke alone.

            Ino Yamanaka was one of their childhood friends, and Sakura’s best friend… and rival. If it wasn’t a contest at school or a recitation in class, it was often about Sasuke. Naruto wanted to snort.

            Uchiha Sasuke was his best friend…and rival. Their dual relationship depended on the situation, and right now, it was definitely the latter.

            To Naruto, Sasuke was a nuisance when it came to his affections for Sakura, since he was the very reason why she barely gave Naruto the time of day. The worst part was the jerk would disregard Sakura’s feelings and would even be rude to her at times. He wasn’t even trying and yet, he was winning. 

            “Do you want to stay for dinner?” asked Sakura after they ran out of stories and rants (for today). “We have gyoza. My mom is making a feast tonight, so I doubt the three of us can eat them all.”

            Naruto gobbled up his last dango before replying. “I can’t. Itachi-nīchan asked me to stay over their house tonight, ‘ttebayo.”

            “Ah. All right, then.” Sakura smiled. “Say hi to him for me, then. And tell Sasuke I said congratulations again.” Her last sentence came with a blush.

            Naruto inwardly groaned. Sasuke again. Itachi-nïchan was Sasuke’s older and much cooler brother. As much as Naruto wanted to spend more time with Sakura, he couldn’t bail on the Uchiha brothers. Plus, Itachi was an amazing cook.

            Not that Sakura’s mom wasn’t a great cook, he’d never ever say that—she’d kill him.

            Once Sakura threw away the empty containers, she led Naruto to the front door where Naruto had put on his shoes.

            He stepped outside, his feet getting ready to run, before looking back to say goodbye. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Sakura-chan! I still need to feed Neko-chan!” And then he dashed down the stairs.

            “Thanks again for the dango! And don’t stay out too late! It’s about to get dark!”

            “Yeah, yeah! Later!” He waved a hand behind and took off.

            He didn’t really worry that much about the sun setting; if anything happened, he could find a way to escape. But it was normal for someone like Sakura to be more cautious. It was a common knowledge that it wasn’t very safe outside when it got dark in the city of Konoha.

            Ever since he was little, Naruto would always hear from commoners and his guardians to never go outside after daylight hours. They said that when night fell, malevolent yūrei and yōkai alike would come into the city, stealing souls and assaulting any unsuspecting bystander wandering in between shadows. They were the reason for the unexplainable deaths, the mystifying occurrences, and sudden disappearances all over Konoha.

            All of it were rumors and folktales to some, of course, but Naruto wholeheartedly believed them. He was a victim of circumstance, too, after all. And he could tell that everyone believed them, too, despite their outside opinions. Even the most skeptical ones.

            The society they lived in was dangerous, but Naruto and the rest in their community learned how to adapt and live with it. Not that he was happy about their circumstances. He found them unfair.

            Naruto continued to run around the second street and was just starting to criticize the failing system and their unmotivated pursuit for justice when he tripped. Well, almost.

            Before his body could hit the ground, he made a swift move and directed his body, headfirst, upwards and off the ground. Naruto backflipped in mid-air and stayed afloat while he caught his breath.

            “Phew! That was a close one, ‘ttebayo!”

            So, he could levitate. It was what separated him from “normal” people or as others would call them, ningen. And yes, it wasn’t as flashy as the others, or as impressive. Or so they liked to believe, anyways. Naruto could do a lot with his “floating” ability. He could sneak in and out of buildings without using the stairs. He could reach things without a ladder. And he could never trip or fall. Most of all, it made for awesome scary pranks.

            “Dammit,” Naruto groaned. The sun was setting on the horizon. “I really need to get going!” He floated back down to the ground and sprinted all the way to his apartment.

The keychain made a lot of noise as Naruto struggled to find the right key. It irritatingly looked the same with his bedroom and bathroom keys. He really should label them from now on (the girls had been nagging him to do so for months now).

            Naruto felt instant relief once the key fit into the keyhole. He turned the doorknob and entered the apartment. Now all he had to do was prepare the food for Neko-chan and he was out of here.

            Kicking off his shoes, Naruto noticed two extra pairs on the floor. Huh? He hurriedly walked into the living room and almost had a heart attack when he found the mayor of Konoha sitting there. And next to him was his grandson and Naruto’s friend, Sarutobi Konohamaru.

            There was a knot of anxiety in Naruto’s stomach at the sight of them in his apartment. What are they doing here? And how did they get in?!

            Of course! The old man had his own key! He forgot about that.

            “Took you long enough, Nīchan!” Konohamaru chuckled. He had that look that said “You’re in biiig trouble!” and Naruto felt like smacking the him in the face and wipe it away. 

            Naruto had known Konohamaru since he was an infant. After all, the kid’s parents were his guardians. So Konohamaru grew up treating Naruto like an older brother. Naruto also treated him like a younger brother and taught him everything he knew. From pranks to ramen and how to talk his way out of a troublesome situation. And like how annoying little brothers could be, the brat had his own moments. Right now, was one of them. 

            “I was at Sakura-chan’s house… dattebayo.” Naruto glanced at the old man. Even if he had a spare key, Sarutobi-ojīchan wouldn’t just come inside his apartment without him around and without reason. Plus, this was the first time he dropped by. Well, Naruto himself moved in just a few months ago, but still.

            The mayor was frowning. That wasn’t good. Then he stood up, his hands behind his back. “I apologize for coming in without your permission. But I haven’t been checking in on you for a while, and Konohamaru was very persistent.” The little rascal quietly snickered beside him. “I also wanted to confirm something my associate told me.” Naruto gulped. Dammit. What had he done this time? “But we’ll get to that later. For now, I want to congratulate you on graduating. Omedeto.”

            Still frazzled, Naruto blinked and nodded. “Thanks. Uh… do you want some tea, Ojīchan?”

            The mayor cracked a smile. “Yes, that would be nice.”

Naruto placed a steaming mug of hot black tea on the table. He sat down on the floor right across the old man. Konohamaru took over his task on feeding Neko-chan, who finally came by.

            Sarutobi Hiruzen had been mayor for over thirty years now. He had done so much for the city and the entire Hī region, gaining the public’s trust overtime. It also seemed like no one wanted to replace him and it didn’t look like he would retire soon, despite his old age. He just turned sixty-nine last February and the entire city practically celebrated it with him (there were a lot of free stuff and special discount offers from numerous stores and stalls). You wouldn’t hear anyone bad-mouthing the mayor. Naruto did agree that he was kind and generous with a sincere heart.

            But still, those things didn’t stop him from being an old stick-in-the-mud.

            To Naruto, he was just a grandpa he often saw and hung out with on special occasions, who often gave gifts and unnecessary lectures.

            Tonight, he wasn’t sure which one he was getting.

            Sarutobi-ojīchan took a sip from the mug and let out a contented sigh. He put the mug back down the table once more. Well, finally. “I suppose this is a good time as any.” Taking a rectangular brown box from beside him on the couch, he pushed it towards Naruto’s direction. “Here. Consider it a gift.”

            “Thank you.” Naruto picked up the box and opened it. He blinked.

            The gift was an old-fashioned… knife? Or maybe a dagger? (It reminded Naruto of those vintage items from the antique shop at the central district.) It was dull and rusty and looked so used.

            Naruto made a face behind the opened box. What was he supposed to do with this?  At least it’s not another boring lecture.

            “It belonged to your father.”

            His expression changed. “. . . Tōchan?” He took another glance at the knife, this time with meaning. But he didn’t touch it. Not yet.

            “I believe that will keep you safe,” Sarutobi-ojīchan continued as he drank his tea.

            “Safe?” Naruto looked up at him. “From what?”

            Sarutobi-ojīchan closed his eyes for a moment before putting down his cup and standing up. He wandered over to the glass doors. “Danger and untimely death surround us all. I use the word ‘untimely’ because in most unfortunate events, it is so. Do you know, Naruto-kun? That every other day, someone from this city goes missing. Most of the time, they aren’t found alive… if they are to be found in the first place. Which isn’t always the case.”

            Naruto looked to the side, saddened by the state of their hometown. And to make it worse, this was the norm in Konoha. People either went missing or were found dead—killed even. This wasn’t news to anyone in their community. In fact, Naruto knew a few of those who disappeared. “I know. I had a classmate who’s still missing, ‘ttebayo.” They weren’t close and they’d only been classmates for two years, and still, everyone in their class had been affected by it.

            “Hm, yes. If I remember correctly, the boy’s name is Kimura Yosuke. His parents divorced a year later. And six months ago, the mother committed suicide.”

            Naruto’s eyes widened in shock. “Suicide?”

            “I’m afraid so.”

            Naruto was still in shock. Last time he heard, Yosuke’s mother was still looking for her son. She must have finally given up. Dammit.

            “Just like I told you—death and danger surround us all. They lurk around our land and hover. The shadows of evil slip out from underground and the dark crevices of building walls. Hiding in all the corners; in all the dark alleys and abandoned places. And as a result, people commit unspeakable, irrational crimes, which we are notorious for.” Sarutobi-ojīchan paused for a moment, then continued with his speech. “That’s why it would be a disastrous if others were able to identify people like us.”

            “What do you mean?”

            “Naruto-kun. Our people have always known about our existence. They’ve seen their fair share of extraordinary things they can’t explain. Some of them are not even phased by it anymore. Nevertheless, people like us, are perceived as threats to our community.”

            Naruto frowned. “But we’re not all bad. Don’t you think it’s unfair, old man?” Why would people criticize them so harshly and so quickly? There are people like him who could do no harm with their ability.

            “Are you expecting them to be open-minded? Our nature and abilities have proven to be far too dangerous. They’re certainly not going to take chances on someone who has the power to inflict harm on them. We cause more harm than good. Despite the usual supernatural encounters, people are still afraid.” The mayor looked him in the eye. “Don’t underestimate a person who is afraid.”

            Naruto looked at the knife again. What if someone saw him earlier when he floated in mid-air? How would they have reacted? He was always told to keep his otherworldly abilities hidden, but he never stopped to think about the reality of consequences if he was ever found out. Now he was able to.

            “An associate of mine saw you floating in town and pranking people earlier this week.” Sarutobi-ojīchan mentioned. “You’re masquerading a ghost samurai now, eh?”

            The mood suddenly changed, and Naruto felt his heart quickening as it always did whenever he was caught. He tried to deflect the conversation. “Y-you were spying on me, dattebayo?!” His eyebrows twitched.  So he’s giving me a lecture after all.

            Sarutobi-ojīchan could only shake his head and close his eyes. “It might already be too late for you.” He started to walk away.

            “Ehh!” Naruto panicked. Hurriedly, he got up to his feet. “What do you mean by that, ‘ttebayo? That sounds really scary coming from you!” The mayor was headed for the genkan. “Hey, hold on! Jīchan!”

            Sarutobi-ojīchan paused his steps but didn’t turn around. “Just be on your guard, Naruto-kun.”

At the genkan, Konohamaru was putting on his shoes. Neko-chan had already left. “Hey, Naruto-nīchan, don’t forget our dinner tomorrow, kore. Kāchan and Tōchan wanted me to remind you every time we see each other, because they know you’ll forget.” He giggled in taunt towards Naruto.

            Naruto gave the little brat a tiny glare, his eyebrows twitching again. “I won’t, ‘ttebayo.” He held the door open for him. Sarutobi-ojīchan was already waiting outside with his white and green suit-clad bodyguards.

            Once the door was closed, Naruto let out a sigh of relief. He went over the round table in his small living room to pick up the box that contained his late father’s knife. The longer he stared at the item, the more curious he got. He closed the lid and moved to his bedroom, so he could put it away. There was no use on thinking about it now, he would just have to save the questions for some other time.

            Upon entering his room, Naruto’s gaze landed on the clock.

            Dammit!         

            It was already late!

            Hastily, Naruto dumped the precious box of memento inside his cabinet beneath his clothes. He would put it in his hiding place tomorrow. He needed to hurry now!

            He picked out clothes from the neat pile inside the cabinet and dumped them into his backpack, went to the bathroom and grabbed his toothbrush to take with him as well.

            Itachi-nīchan must be home by now. Naruto just hoped he wasn’t finished cooking.

            He ran around the apartment, discarding cups and plates on the sink and reminding himself to wash them tomorrow. He took his backpack and wore his shoes at the genkan, then hurried outside before running back in—“Dammit! My keys!”—and going out again once he grabbed hold of the keys. After making sure the door was locked, Naruto dashed down the stairs.

            He went over to his orange bike, put on his helmet, unlocked the tiny padlock and got on.

            Naruto was practically running on the pedals as he headed out into the streets. The night breeze felt cold and crisp against his face, blowing his messy golden blonde hair and roving through his scalp. It wasn’t long before he reached the main road. There weren’t too many cars or pedestrians on the area, so it was quiet. The lamp posts were the only source of light along the way, including the headlight on Naruto’s bike. He could still see and pay enough attention on the road.

            As Naruto geared up to go faster, he tightened his grip on the handle bars when his ears picked up a noise—a deep, harsh-sounding growl. Although…

            It didn’t sound like it came from an animal.

            Grabbing the brakes, Naruto turned his front wheel the other way. The sudden motion resulted with him skidding his tires to a stop on the asphalt with his foot.

            He took off his helmet and turned up his hearing, focusing on the sound he just heard.

            The growl from earlier was now mixed with short, irritable grunts and…  mumbling curses.

            It was a man. He sounded angry. But there was more.

            Naruto stood up from his bike. He took it with him towards the sidewalk and left it leaning against the lamp post. He hung his helmet on one of the handlebars before following the man’s voice.

            Something felt off. His gut immediately reacted the moment he heard that noise.  It was twisting inside of him in all the wrong ways. Any rational person would’ve walked away. But Naruto had always been different. He couldn’t ignore this one. It just wasn’t in his nature. And unlike earlier at school, no one was around to hold him back.

            In front of him, he could see a narrow alleyway. It was dark, but he could see it clearly. There were stacks of crates and boxes along the dim path.

            The noises the man was making were accompanied by a steady rhythm of slices in the air.

            Naruto stiffened. This guy…!

            Every cell in his body was showing him signs to turn around, grab his bike and sped the hell away from there. The alleyway wasn’t inviting. The cold wind was whispering to his skin to go back.

            But again, it wasn’t in his nature. He had to see.

            With a gulp, Naruto stepped into the alleyway.

            The angry grunts and slices continued. 

            He crouched behind one of the crates, looked over, and then…

            His eyes widened. Shit! 

            There was blood. All over—that was the first thing he saw.

            The second was a woman. Sprawled on the ground, eyes wide open, and her sandy blonde tresses stained with blood. There was so much blood that her whole torso was red; he almost mistook it as the color of her blouse.

            And lastly, above the woman was the man Naruto heard earlier. He had a knife in his hand, and with apparent determination, was stabbing the poor woman across her chest and stomach over and over. Naruto couldn’t see his face since he had his back turned to him.

            He had seen a corpse before. More than once. But it wasn’t like this. He was witnessing a person committing murder firsthand for the first time. The scene was so gruesome, Naruto felt a tremor in his body. His jaw slackened and he was pretty sure he hadn’t blinked once since he walked in.

            He swallowed hard. This guy is bad news!

            Then, the mayor’s words came back to haunt him: “Death and danger surround us all.”

            He should run. No, he should call the police. Or get Itachi. Unfortunately, the shock and fear were preventing him to think smart—he usually could when it came to situations where he needed to escape or run.

            Still not taking his eyes off the scene in front of him, Naruto stood up. He took a step back. He knew he needed to be quiet, but he was having a little difficulty controlling his legs, and his heart was beating too damn loud.

            Unlike the woman. Her own heart was no longer beating. She wasn’t breathing. She was dead.

            Something wasn’t right. Naruto felt it the moment he walked over earlier. Something was seriously wrong with this guy. Something sinister and dark. He didn’t look like he wanted to stop stabbing her. He was so angry.

            Naruto took another step backwards, and to his horror, his hand accidentally brushed against one of the boxes behind.

            Crap! His head whirled around and saw a few had been knocked down.

            Shadow loomed over him and he stiffened. Instinctively, he snapped his head back.

            He stopped breathing.

            He could see his face now.

            The man was on his feet, glaring him down with his blood-covered face. His hand tightened the grip on the hilt of the bloodstained knife beside him. “Why did you let me see you, kid?”

            He should’ve listened to the wind after all.

Chapter is available here: AO3, Fanfiction and Wattpad.

[remmammie]

Hello! I've been dying for your inbox to open again! I love your writing style ; w;! May I ask for Riku falling in love with a princess of heart from a moon theme kingdom who seems out of his reach? Sorry if its confusing ; w;

Oh, thank you so much!!! Little cutie, I was so excited to write this, I adore lunar aesthetics, especially in conjunction with more graceful characters like Riku. He's such an interesting character to write for! I hope you enjoy this!

(Though the term "Princess" obviously implies a female-coded reader, it's the only gendered term used. Approach that how you will, lovelies!)

Riku x Princess of Heart!Reader HCs

It’s likely that, after the first few times the Princesses of Heart were targeted, you became one of the new Seven Princesses of Heart. Through some sort of magical means, you were put into contact with the other princess, an elder of which introduced you to the responsibilities of a Princess of Heart.

In a kingdom that’s naturally so dark, illuminated solely by the moon, your heart, and your people’s radiance, it’s only natural that darkness would strike one day or another. As a Princess of Heart, it was your responsibility to reach out to those who could help you and your people: Keyblade wielders. The concept was pretty foreign to you being a kingdom so far out from the rest of the worlds, but so were the Heartless themselves and, frankly, you and your kingdom were afraid.

Of course, knowing how efficient the Keyblade wielders were, you weren’t surprised by how quickly one arrived and by how eager he seemed to help. What you were surprised by was how close to your age the Keyblade Master was. Riku was just as shocked. Sure, he had known other Princesses of Heart to be quite young: Kairi, Alice, Snow White, etc. but seeing someone his age leading an entire kingdom and trying their best to bravely face the darkness…that was new.

He was sent to your kingdom for a reason, though, and had to fight off the Heartless, protect your people, and seal the Keyhole first before he could gawk about you any longer. Your bravery in the face of darkness astounds him and leaves him completely in awe. You’re out in the field with him, using healing magic to heal him and to rescue your people. This is such a new, frightening experience for you - how are you not terrified?

The truth is that hiding your fear is tiring and, quickly after the Keyhole is sealed and the Heartless have disappeared, you retreat back into your place of residence beneath the moonlight. Riku is hesitant to leave so soon (though you can’t recognise why,) so you invite him to spend some time beneath the eternal night of your world with you.

He makes a very conscious effort not to touch you or even breathe the same air as you, to bare his Keyblade in front of you or be cold. At first, he thought it was only your title and your prestige that stopped him from being more liberal than he is. Then, when the fighting was over and he saw you cast in pale white moonlight, Riku realised he had fallen hard. 

If anything, he tries to stray even further from you when he realises. He knows you’re not fragile so he’s not afraid of hurting or breaking you…but he feels as if he’s not worthy to be in your presence. Where he backed down and cowered before darkness before, you immediately stood up to protect your people; where he felt the world had betrayed him, you embraced the love and trust of your people; where he felt intimidated by such a person, you felt free to compliment his fighting prowess and talent with the Keyblade.

Your grace leaves him flustered and, without recognising it, you’ve been chipping away at this wall he's incredibly hastily and shoddily built around his heart. Riku is in denial, yet you can already tell he’s fallen for you by the redness on his face revealed by the moonlight and the twitching of his nervous hands when you take them in your own.

He might tell you he’s undeserving of a princess, especially one of Heart, but need you remind Riku that he’s a Keyblade Master? If anything, he’s out of your league! You both laugh and, though Riku still ends up feeling a twinge of insecurity sometimes when he glances over at your conjoined hands, he’s proud to have your number in his Gummiphone when he heads back to the worlds he’s more familiar with. Maybe he’ll take you to Destiny Islands one day and you can share a special fruit. Or maybe you have a special romantic tradition from your own world you can share with him?

[aminiatureworld]

Deserving

Characters: Childe, gn!reader

Word Count: 1,651

Warnings: None

Premise: Even those who don’t regret their choices can doubt their worth.

In which Childe feels undeserving.

Author’s Note: Since I’m no longer dying you get a proper length fic. I realized halfway through I didn’t write anything for Diluc’s birthday, but blatant Childe favoritism comes first!

He’d never expected to be in a relationship, expected to spend his entire life serving the Tsaritsa and her purposes, dying for the salvation of Snezhnaya. He had no need for romance, no need for any of those connections that humans did. He’d given that all up the day he’d stepped into the Abyss, and for a long time he’d managed to make it seem like it didn’t matter to him, even to himself. And then he’d met you.

You were the greatest source of Childe’s happiness, offering him a sort of sanctuary, without any attempt to do so. You didn’t treat him as a lesser being, as the automaton he’d turned into; nor would you accept his superiority, determined to be his equal in every way. It was refreshing, to have a relationship unfettered by bureaucracy or by prejudice. But it was also frightening, and the small voice inside Childe that whispered he was no more than a monster was quick to remind him how undeserving he was of your love.

Not that Childe didn’t think that already, that he didn’t feel that emptiness inside of him where had once stood his hope, his innocence, the piece of his humanity that could still believe in a good ending. Sometimes it seemed even his empathy had been sacrificed, and now he had little left of himself. All these feelings had only grown, given encouragement the more time he spent with you, the more time he realized how much was truly missing from himself. And though he tried to ignore these feelings, knowing they weren’t your burden to bear, knowing that he could never change what had happened, he still knew they were there.

 “Are you okay?”

You tugged at the end of Childe’s sleeve, eyes filled with concern. It was a lovely day, right between the beginning of spring and the end of winter. It was colder than it had been the past few days, and you’d taken the lowered temperature as an opportunity to steal Childe’s scarf. The tails flapped about around you, and for a moment Childe’s eyes followed the movement as he attempted to come up with something to say.

“I’m perfectly fine my dear. Simply a little tired.”

“A long day at work?”

“A long week. The servants of the Tsaritsa never sleep, as you know firsthand.” Childe smirked, ruffling your hair. The movement seemed to distract you, and as you batted at his hands, grumbling as usual about his work, the Harbinger wondered if it wasn’t dishonest of him to lie about such a thing.

 “I’m sorry I have to go again.” Childe smiled apologetically, checking his belt to make sure his wax and extra bow strings were there.

“It’s alright.” You smiled, leaning over to give Childe a quick peck on the cheek.

Childe smiled back, before leaning down to kiss you properly. He wondered if you could feel all the love he held towards you, if his lips could convey his regret not just in words. He wondered if one day these fleeting kisses would be enough to sate the distance between the two of you each time he left.

“I’ll write to you as soon as I find a mailbox.” He said, withdrawing slightly, hand still grazing your hip.

“I’ll try to reply.”

“Try?”

“No promises.” You teased.

“The audacity! Honestly, how do I ever put up with you?”

“Because you love me?”

“Yes.” Childe pressed one last kiss to your forehead. “Because I love you.”

If only my love were enough to keep us united, he added in his mind, too apprehensive to let those words be released into the air.

 My dear,

How very boring things are without you. Honestly, sometimes I wonder if I’m not working in a glorified daycare, my subordinates more uncontrollable with every passing day. One must wonder if it’s even worth it to whip them into shape, for they make poor sparring partners. If you were here you’d knock every single one of them on the ground, before they could even wonder what an adventurer was doing in a Fatui camp. Maybe I’ll invite you next time, we’ll make it happen.

Childe couldn’t express truly the solace he found in writing to you. It was easier to write sometimes than talk, and it was easier to send his words out to you than rely on the memories of what had already happened. More than that it was the one thing that reminded him of his outside existence, of his world beyond the camp grounds and the men and women who dragged their feet around him, no wish to fight in them, only the wish to get a few hours more sleep. It was a depressing existence, if Childe were honest with himself. It’d become even more depressing, now that he missed you.

He set down his pen for a moment, sighing at the ink which was now frozen in its jar. Where were you now? Were you happy? Did you miss him? Did you resent the fact that he was gone? Three weeks was nothing to a member of the Fatui, how long had Childe been in Liyue before he met you, and yet now those weeks seemed interminable. And if it seemed so to him, he who was used to the isolation, then what would it be like for you?

The Harbinger sighed. Placing a blank sheet on top of his letter he stood up. He never got that much time to write letters. Maybe that was why they weren’t really any good. But you didn’t mind. Didn’t you?

 It was dark when he stepped off the ship and onto the docks of Liyue. Night had fallen, and the lanterns were lit, casting a familiar glow on the city which Childe had come to appreciate so much. Taking a pocket watch out of his pack he checked the time, cursing when he realized how truly late it was. Hurrying up the ramp he didn’t bother to look behind at the subordinates who were also plodding towards the city. If they got lost it was their fault.

The door opened silently, something that made the Harbinger breathe out a sigh of relief. Hopefully he wouldn’t wake you up. Setting down his things he smiled slightly to himself. It’d certainly be a surprise, you waking up to him next to you. Hopefully you’d forgive him for not waking you at 4 in the morning. Walking slowly down the hall, hoping that the occasional creaks weren’t audible, Childe slid open the door to the bedroom you shared.

The first thing he noticed was the chill of the room, something that surprised him. The next thing he noticed was the door to the balcony open. The third thing was you, leaning against the railing, gaze pointed towards the inky sky, expression somewhat distant. He didn’t move for a moment, taking in this small moment of intimacy. You looked beautiful, face glowing slightly from the distant lanternlight, expression serene, a soft smile playing at the edges of your mouth. And yet there was something opaque in your eyes, something that Childe couldn’t quite touch upon. It shook him out of his thoughts, and caused him to call out softly to you.

“I’m home.”

You started for a moment, spinning around to meet the Harbinger’s gaze. For a moment you were still, but then a sort of cry left your lips, as you barreled into Childe’s chest. He just as soon wrapped his arms around you, sighing softly, for the moment feeling nothing but pure bliss, pure love.

“You’re home.”

“I am.”

“I’ve missed you so much.” You drew back, expression ecstatic.

“I’ve missed you too.”

For a moment Childe hesitated, not wanting to break this moment, not wanting to go down that path of doubt, of fear and uncertainty. Yet he was tired, and slightly emotional. If he regretted it later so be it, he had to ask the question that burned in the back of his mind, the question that had once more reappeared upon seeing your expression.

“Am I worth waiting for?”

“Oh Ajax.” your reaction was immediate as you wrapped your arms once more around him, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek. “Always, you’re always worth waiting for.”

“But I’m away for so long. And when I’m here I’m still bound to my duties as a Harbinger. Nor can I shed that part of me when I’m not doing my job. I cannot get back those pieces of me that would make me a better lover, a better person. What if I’m just not worth it?”

“Don’t talk like that!” You let out a small sigh, that opaque expression once more visible in your eyes. “I wish you wouldn’t talk like that. You aren’t missing anything, you aren’t worth any less than me or any other person. You’re loyalties might be… unconventional –”

“You mean wrong to most?”

“I mean unconventional. And yes even wrong. There may be parts of your work I hate, things I wish you wouldn’t do or have to do. But I don’t wish for you to change. You. Childe. Ajax. You are who you are, and that is the person I’ve fallen in love with. It’s a choice I made, and I don’t question it, don’t regret it. So neither should you.”

“Are you sure?” Childe knew he was probably being annoying, but he didn’t care. Neither did you, it seemed, for you simply shook you head, an exasperated expression on your face.

“Yes. I will always be sure.”

Childe nodded, feeling as if a weight had been lifted from off his back. Suddenly he was aware of how very tired he was. Stifling a yawn he smiled once more.

“It’s late. We should go to sleep.”

“Yes,” you smiled, closing the balcony door and sliding the curtains closed, “we should.”

[storiesforallfandoms]

first show ~ aaron tveit

word count: 1756

request?: yes!

“I'll take anything Aaron Tveit. (There are not enough fics out there lol)”

description: after years of practice and studying, she gets casted in her first big broadway show, and finds herself falling for her leading man

pairing: aaron tveit x female!reader

warnings: swearing

masterlist (one, two)

I gasped as the costume person pulled out the beautiful black dress I was meant to wear for our run through of Come What May. I couldn’t get over how beautiful my costumes were. I almost felt like I was undeserving of them. I was fresh out of college and already cast in my first big Broadway musical. If this was a dream, I didn’t want to ever wake up.

“You don’t have long to get dressed,” the costume person reminded me. “The dress rehearsal for Come What May is in 10. Although I’d love to see you staring at all your costumes in amazement.”

“I’ll do that after dress rehearsal,” I joked.

I took the black dress and quickly changed into it, longing to look at myself in the mirror but knowing I had no time. With my hair and makeup already finished, I rushed to the stage. Luckily, I wasn’t the only one running a bit late as my co-star was yet to arrive once I took my place.

“There’s our Satine!” the director proclaimed as I stood on stage. “Welcome to the stage, dear. How do you feel?”

“Nervous,” I admitted. “But I look damn good for a nervous girl.”

The director chuckled. “Our Christian should be here soon.”

“He’s here!”

I tried not to seem as starstruck as I felt at the sound of my co-star’s voice. Aaron joined me on stage, dressed in his Christian costume. I had to try my best not to fangirl over him. He was basically Broadway royalty, and I was acting with him in my first show! I had to remind myself how to breathe.

I smiled slightly at him. “Nice to meet you. I’m (Y/N).”

“Nice to meet you, too, (Y/N). I’m Aaron.”

I had to stop myself from responded with I know as I shook his hand.

“While I’d love for you two to get to know one another, I’d like to run Come What May first,” the director told us. “It’s one of the biggest songs in the musical, and the one with the most chemistry. So, we need to nail this song before we can nail the entire musical.”

Aaron and I nodded and took our places for the song. The band started playing the song and I felt my nerves growing. I tried to focus just on Aaron, but that made me even more nervous.

“Never knew I could feel like this Like I’ve never seen the sky before Want to vanish inside your kiss Every day I love you more and more”

No shock that his voice sounded perfect. I already knew this, I had seen the show on its opening night years before. But it was different to hear the voice up close, too have him singing directly to me. It made my heart flutter and I almost forgot my cues.

“Come what may Come what may I will love you until my dying day”

For a moment I feared my voice wouldn’t work, but when I opened my mouth the words came out effortlessly.

“Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace”

I tried not to break character as pride swelled within me at the look on Aaron’s face. I could only describe it as a look of astonishment, as if my voice shocked him, and that made me so proud.

My heart spiked as Aaron took my hands and we sang together

“Storm clouds my gather And stars may collide But I love you (I love you) Until the end of time”

The music swelled as we reached the end of the song, our voices mixing together perfectly as we held the last line. I looked into Aaron’s perfectly blue eyes, glad that the song had ended because he had taken my breath away.

I had forgotten all about the small audience of crew members and our director until he spoke. “That was great! But can we take it from that last chorus and can you guys end the song with the kiss?”

“O-Oh,” I stuttered, still trying to recover from the song. “Y-You want to do the kiss now?”

“It’s better to get the first one out of the way now to get past any initial awkwardness.”

“Are you okay with that?” Aaron asked me, concern on his face.

I nodded. “Yeah. He has a point, we will be kissing almost every night. We should get used to it now.”

The director motioned to the band and they began playing from the last chorus again.

“Come what may Come what may I will love you until my dying day”

I looked into Aaron’s eyes, the only thing keeping me calm in that moment. One of his hands reached up to gently cup my face, bringing me closer to him. The distance between us was small, but it felt like I was waiting for his lips to touch mine forever.

When they finally did, it felt as though something had exploded inside of me. My whole body felt warm and fuzzy, and my stomach felt like it was full of butterflies. I couldn’t stop myself from putting a hand behind his neck, wanting to keep his lips on mine for a long time.

We were forced to pull away when the director began to clap, completely taking us out of the moment.

“That’s what I’m talking about!” he exclaimed. “That was brilliant! See? Now there’ll be no awkwardness when we run that scene from now on.”

I wouldn’t say that, I thought, glancing over at Aaron. I wondered if he had felt what I did, or if it was just another stage kiss for him. If he felt the latter, it would definitely be very awkward for me.

“Okay, you two take five and then (Y/N), I want you ready for your entrance medley.”

The crew continued on about their work while the director turned his attention to his assistant and began talking about the technical stuff having to do with the show. Aaron and I awkwardly stood on stage together for a moment, unsure of what to do next.

“I guess I should go get ready for my entrance rehearsal,” I said, trying my best to look at Aaron. How the hell did two actors who weren’t already in relationships kiss on stage and not fall in love?

“I’ll walk you to your dressing room,” Aaron offered. “We can get to know one another.”

I smiled at this and the two of us exited the stage together.

“So,” Aaron started, “there’s a rumor on the streets that this is your first ever show.”

I nodded. “Yeah, it is. I’m actually not long out of college. I graduated maybe a month ago? Top of my classes because I was always an overachiever, and most of my teacher’s favorites. Actually, it was one of my teachers that got me this audition. She knows the director and when it was announced that Karen Olivo was leaving the show, she urged me to audition.”

“Looks like it worked out in your favor.”

“Yeah, somehow,” I said with a slight laugh. “I’m sure there were dozens of better, more experienced girls who auditioned. My teacher must’ve slipped the director a bribe or something to get me this role.”

“Or, and hear me out on this one, you were actually that good and got the role on your own.”

I shook my head. “No way. That’s nearly impossible.”

“Nearly being the keyword. Newbies gotta start somehow or else Broadway shows would never have a cast.”

“Yeah, but most newbies start as a part of the ensemble or the company, then make their way to very minor character, then less than minor character, and then, if they’re lucky, they become main characters. It’s not as easy as auditioning fresh out of school and getting the role right away.”

Aaron shrugged. “I don’t know, I think it’s that easy for some people. You have a fantastic voice, definitely a voice worth of a Satine and not just an ensemble girl.”

I smiled up at Aaron. “I appreciate the compliment, and the confidence you have in me. I hope I don’t let any of you guys down.”

“I don’t think you will. I think you’re going to be amazing. You’ll probably steal the show from me.”

I laughed at this. There was absolutely no way that I, a newbie, could possibly steal the show from a Broadway vet like Aaron Tveit.

I was sad when we reached my dressing room, although I knew it wasn’t that far of a walk from the stage. I wanted to talk to Aaron for longer, to have more time alone with him. But we were trying to prepare a show, and that meant that eventually I had to give up my time with him in order to rehearse.

Both of us paused outside of my dressing room. It was almost like we were waiting for the other to leave first. I glanced at the clock in my dressing room and sighed upon seeing the time.

“I have about two more minutes to get into my costume for my entrance medley and to get back to the stage. So, I guess this is where we say goodbye.”

“Well, only for now. I’ll be in the audience watching you absolutely destroy that medley, and then we have basically the entire play together that we have to rehearse,” he told me. “But, if you’re not too tired after rehearsal, I’d love to maybe go out and grab a drink with you. If you’d be interested in doing that, that is.”

Now was when my voice stopped working. I could barley believe that this was actually happening. Too many amazing things going on the one time, I was sure I was dreaming. I had to slip my hands behind my back to pinch myself, and I had to suppress a yelp as I realized I was very much awake.

“Yeah,” I finally managed. “I’d love to.”

Aaron’s smile was as wide as a child on Christmas morning. “Okay! Well, I won’t distract you any longer. Break a leg out there.”

I watched after him as he went back in the direction of the stage before hurrying into my dressing room to prepare for my next scene. The entire time I had a smile on my face so wide that my cheeks were starting to hurt.

I guess dreams really do come true.

[byooregard]

hanahaki :)

im giggling manically right now olivier spacecitytraffic anyways

uhh idk how id grade this cause lets be real im answering this ask because i have a whole unmade powerpoint prepared about this particular fanfic trope.

i think i'm gonna go with like.... a D? most times if i hear the au i'd be turned off but i have read enough subversions of it and ways that it's done well that if i heard good things about the fic i'd read it.

Now for a) my reasoning for why i don't like hanahaki aus in their purest forms (again subversions/different ways they do them can make them better) and b) how i'd personally write a hanahaki au. this is going under a cut because it's a bit long and i tend to talk a lot

Okay so as for why I don't like them, most can be pretty summed up in 'oh lord the amatonormativity'

so hanahaki aus often revolve around the idea that the person with the disease is in love with someone who doesn't love them back, and that that person loving them back will cure the disease. I feel like the idea that whether or not you love someone romantically could be life or death for them is kind of uncomfortable on its own, and it makes me especially uncomfortable as an arospec person.

On that note, the idea tends to put a lot of value on romantic relationships over platonic ones. I don't mind if romance is the center of a romance story, that's fine, what I do mind is when someone can be surrounded by the love of their friends but still dying from the lack of romantic love from one person.

outside of the amatonormativity, i also find that hanahaki aus can have some problems when it comes to wrapping up. (this is the part where i expose myself as someone who looks at the plot structure of fanfics. if this is what makes you unfollow me I'll be neither mad nor surprised). Most times I've seen it, the cure for the disease is either the love becoming requited, or the person removing the flowers in some way that often accompanies them loosing their romantic feelings for the object of their unrequited affection.

My problems with the first of those is the whole coercion thing, and also that it feels a bit too easy, like this person was dying and them bam love requited, they’re fine! The second one’s problems are that depending on how it’s worked, it can feel too easy or not worth it, and will usually be overall unsatisfying. If you go the direction where the person with the disease only looses romantic feelings, and is able to get them back, it often feels kind of like ‘why did they not do this in the first place’. you have to justify really well why the character cares more about their romantic feelings for one person than their life (and i’m not saying that you can’t do that, just that it’s a bit hard), otherwise the whole premise feels like needless angst. with the second option where the person looses all feelings for that person, and might not be able to get them back sets up a situation that you really can’t get out of.

my last gripe with hanahaki aus is very much personal preference and it’s that the ones i’ve seen don’t lean nearly enough into the body horror. I used to not read these aus at all because of how some of them i’d read made the whole sickness thing all delicate and beautiful, and i personally can’t ever view sickness and disease that way.

ANYWAYS, now that i’m done complaining about this trope, here’s how i’d fix it, because i do think the base idea has a lot of potential, and there are a lot of parts i do like. (Cw for hanahaki au typical body horror)

number one, i’m taking out the whole unrequited romantic love thing, in my world, you can get the hanahaki disease from general feelings or beliefs that you’re unloved or undeserving of love (romantic or otherwise) from the people around you.

number two is the biggest change i’m making to the general idea of the au itself: the part of the disease that actually kills you is the roots and vines of the flowers wrapping around your lungs and cutting off your airways, rather than the coughing up of flowers itself.

coughing up flowers is actually a good sign-- whenever you’re feeling the love of people around you, or learning to accept their love, the flowers start to loose their hold on you and the only way to get them out is to cough them up. Healing from the disease is a long process of learning to be loved and slowly getting all the flowers out of your lungs, and it’s often more obviously and immediately painful than just letting the disease run its course. The thing about loneliness, just like the disease, is that while it can be more comfortable in the quiet, that quiet is slowly suffocating you.

there’s no real way to know if you’ve been totally cured of the disease, and you have to be constantly vigilant to make sure the roots don’t start growing back as you fall into old patterns, but if you’re lucky, and if you work at it, one day you’ll wake up and realize that it’s been a long time since you’ve had to cough up flowers, and you can breathe just fine.

so... yeah! it was originally an idea just to change the way the cure for hanahaki works so that it can feel worth it while still feeling achievable in the story, but it also morphed into a lot of feelings about like the non linear process of healing and etc etc. there you have it! please send me more asks so i can ramble about fanfic tropes please its my favorite thing ever

[nagito-kissmaeda]

A Lapse in Judgement

CHAPTER ONE: A Dangerous Present CHAPTER TWO: A Past Forgotten CHAPTER THREE: A Foreshadowing CHAPTER FOUR: One Possible Conclusion CHAPTER FIVE: Untethered

Komaeda Nagito x Ultimate Empath!Reader : NSFW Summary : Codependency is the kind of thing that will get someone like you killed, but now that you've tasted him you aren't sure you could go without. You should be smarter than this.

AKA: Ultimate Empath reader gets nasty with Komaeda. Even though she knows it's a really bad idea.

Contains: she/her pronouns, penetrative sex, blow jobs, referenced canon character death

read on AO3 

Being an ultimate empath is not easy, and it never has been. Your whole life you have tried to distance yourself from other people, because your talent means it is far too easy for you to grow attached to them. To feel that you are them.

Now that you are trapped in a killing game it is even harder. Staying detached now of all times, is incredibly important. 

But you failed. 

Komaeda’s jutting hip bones dig into your thighs, his skin, usually so pale you can almost see right though, is flushed pink. His swollen lips move frantically as he mutters, pleads, begs. Self deprecation, words of adoration. Separated only by desperate whimpers for more. He looks angelic writhing beneath you, with his eyes squeezed shut and the rapid rise and fall of his bare chest. He whimpers, and his hips stutter up to meet yours. Almost like he is ashamed to do it. You cup his face in your hand, cooing softly at him.

A few strands of thin white hair are plastered to his forehead with sweat, you brush them away and tuck them behind his ear. His eyes snap open at the touch of your fingers, and you feel him. He is desperate, he is needy, he is honoured, he is unworthy. You slow the grind of your hips on the crotch of his jeans, placing a hand on his chest to feel his heart. It beats fast, like a hummingbird stuck behind his ribs. His skin is pulled taut across his bones, when you meet his eyes again, he feels disgusting. 

“Hah…” he mutters, high and breathless, “that you would touch someone as filthy as me like this…” 

You cut him off. Pressing your forehead to his, “Shh. Nagito, I know.” 

He laughs again, it’s shaky and weak, “of course! An ultimate empath like yourself, you know everything! I should have known better.” 

You kiss him firmly, one of your hands digging into the halo of white hair on the pillow. Trying to ignore the strands that come away in your fingers. He talks about you so highly, an ultimate empath like yourself, you should be the one who knows better. Komaeda is unstable. His feelings are so strong, so passionate you can’t help but sink into them. If you were too close when he finally tipped off the edge, you might just find yourself jumping after him. Despite the smarter part of yourself screaming at you to remember everything he has already done, you shove your tongue into his mouth and moan as his dances with yours. 

Your hands slip down his torso, feeling the warmth of his skin under your fingers. You suck in a breath as your fingers drop over the edge of his rib cage and down to the valley of his stomach. He is thinner than he looks in his clothes, did anyone else know? Could anyone else tell just how sick he was? 

“Your hands must be...haa...getting so dirty...tou-touching me” Komaeda mumbles into your mouth. The words taste like poison. 

You open your eyes and stare into his. He feels guilty, he feels undeserving. Underneath that, there is a glimmer. A hope that despite all, you may still accept him. Your eyes are welling up, you are too deep inside him. How is he not crying all the time?

“You are the only person my hands want to touch, Nagito.” you whisper, licking up the shell of his ear.

As much as you want to know how he feels. To know if your words had helped. It would be too much for you right now, so you close your eyes and fumble with the button on his jeans. He wriggles beneath you as it pops open, and sucks in a breath and you slide down the zipper. 

His cock is as delicate as the rest of him. Thin and pale, tip flushed pink. Your hand shakes as you reach out to grip it, a moan that almost sounds like an apology reverberates from Komaeda’s throat. His skin is soft. 

“Wha-What are you? Wh- hng!” 

He is reduced to a babbling mess when you give him a cursory pump. You watch him carefully, for a sign or a word, anything to indicate that he wants you to stop. His eyes are closed and his mouth is open, drool slowly making its way down his chin. 

You moisten your lips, and then lick a stripe up the side of his cock. 

Komaeda cries out, sitting up and gripping your shoulders. You realise, that this is the first time he has touched you. His eyes are wide, his teeth are bared. He is shocked, he is aroused, but most of all he is afraid. Waiting for the other foot to drop, for you to pull away and laugh, like this was all just a big joke. You feel his heart beating in your chest.

“I...I...I’ll ruin you.” He breathes, “You are going to let my filth ruin your perfect mouth?”

“If my mouth is to be ruined.” You whisper, lips barely brushing the tip of his cock, “I’d like you to do it.”

You can’t resist. You meet his eyes again. His arousal crashes with yours, and you feel your cunt throb. It is hard to look into his eyes with the tsunami of emotions overtaking you, but you do it for him. His misty green eyes look at you desperately, his perfect pink lips hang open as his breath heaves. He looks like a dream, you wish he could get inside your heart like you could his. That he could know that it isn’t fake, not with him.

He falls backward in a full body shudder when you take him into your mouth. Whining, writhing. His hands are buried back in the sheets of your bed, purple and floral. They match the ones you had at home. How strange. You have to press a hand down firm on Komaeda’s belly to stop him from stuttering his cock deeper down your throat. His hips wriggle and grind, but he’s whimpering and apologising like he has no control over it.

“It’s so warm.” He babbles, breath heaving, “Trash like me should never...hahhh...can’t stay still…”

You smile around him. Bringing your head back up to circle his head with your tongue. He loses himself, one of his hands tangles in your hair. 

“I shouldn’t be touching you. I shouldn’t.” 

You release him from your mouth with a pop. Leaving the hand in your hair, and bring his other to your bare chest. Komaeda stops breathing. His eyes are wide, blinking up at where his hand rests on your breast. You grip your hand over his, and force him to squeeze.

“I want you to touch me. Ruin me.” You shuffle further up his body, straddling him again, “we are equals, Nagito. Especially here.”

With his jeans and underwear hanging down around his thighs, the only thing separating you from his cock are your panties. As much as you want to take things slowly, as much as you want to take a moment to enjoy something that you should never do again. You find yourself grinding your clit down on his cock. Komaeda chokes on a moan, the hand on your breast reflexively tightening. He gasps, shocked at the feeling of your soft flesh beneath his hand. He is looking up at you now, but it is impossible to know how he is feeling because his eyes are glued to your breasts. Watching them sway as you grind back and forth. He whines.

You want to feel this way forever, you want to listen to his needy little sounds for the rest of your life. Three people didn’t die yesterday, everything is fine. Komaeda is underneath you, you are in control. Mikan didn’t look you in the eye during the trial, you hadn’t felt the thrill. You hadn’t felt the thrill of despair rushing up your spine. It hadn’t felt familiar. Everything was-

“Stop.” Komaeda mutteres, sitting up and gripping your shoulders, “Hey. Stop” 

You freeze. He is worried about you, and you aren’t sure why until he brushes a tear from your cheek. 

“I’m fine.” 

His brows draw together, and for a moment, he permits himself to touch you. His spindly fingers curl into your hair and rub soft circles on the back of your head, all the while he is just staring at you. Opening himself up like a book for you to read. 

He is blessed

He is happy

He is worried

He is-

He feels- 

Oh. 

Oh no. 

His smile is soft. His eyes are gentle. Even without your talent, you could tell that his face says I love you.

It is always hard to distinguish between your own feelings and someone else’s. they all swirl and combine inside of you, like someone has stuck them in a blender. It’s impossible to tell where Komaeda’s love ends and your feelings begin. 

“Better?” He asks

You nod

He smiles wide, “good. It must be hard sharing the emotions of everyone all the time, but just think of the hope it will lead to! All the good things you will be able to do!” 

You know he is trying to pay you a compliment. But you know the words, you’re so much better than me. Are lurking underneath. He’s right, it is hard not being able to tell which are your feelings and which are not. That you can never be fully sure that the throbbing in your heart is real or fabricated. What you can tell, is that it's much harder being him. 

So you kiss him. The tracks from tears running down your cheeks just starting to dry. 

His mouth tastes like danger, but his lips are gentle. He is a walking contradiction. Your teeth catch his bottom lip and his blood tastes syrupy sweet. He moans so gently into your mouth and you swallow the sound, it is only for you. Codependency is the kind of thing that will get someone like you killed, but now that you've tasted him you aren't sure you could go without. You should be smarter than this. 

His eyes are hooded when you finally pull your lips from his. His hair tangled and fucked in a way that only your fingers could manage, his lips a perfect shade of red that only you could make them. Two hearts are racing in your chest, beating in time. 

“It feels like I know you.”

He blinks, “you do know me.”

“No I-” it feels like you know him from before, from another life, another time. It’s crazy. You’re being crazy. All you can do is laugh to yourself and cup his cheek, “don't worry about it.” 

He opens his mouth to say something, but then thinks better of it. You can tell that he is confused and even a little concerned, but you just laugh. 

“Nagito. I'm fine.”

His head tilts. The motion so sweet that your heart clenches, “you don't need anything?” 

Your lips curl up in a smile as you lean in closer and whisper, “just you.” 

He swallows, you catch his Adam's apple bobbing in this throat. His arousal is back, and so is yours. You push him back gently so his head is rested on the pillows again, the moonlight hitting his thin hair in a way that makes it shimmer. You push your panties to the side.

You didn’t think to bring a condom. How unlucky, you muse, lips pulling into a tight smile. Though Komaeda’s luck has not run out yet, because during a killing game, safe sex is the last thing on your mind. 

His head flings backward as you engulf him. His pretty voice cracking and his spindly fingers gripping the sheets. The moonlight from the window crosses his skin and he is glowing. You still, getting a feel for just how deep his cock reaches inside. Afraid to move and break the perfect picture before you. One of Komaeda’s hands lifts up to hide his face, and he laughs.

“I-I’m in…” his breath rattles in his throat, “I’m inside of you...hah...you’ve let me taint even your insides.” 

You can’t help it, you grin down at him.

“Go on then.” You say, rocking your hips in a way that makes his breath catch, “Take me. Ruin me for anyone else.” 

At your words. His fingers dig tight into your thighs, and his colliding emotions read as an internal battle. A war between his self deprecation, and his desire to just fuck you. 

Even your own cheeks turn pink in that moment, feeling just how desperate he is.

“C’mon, baby.” 

When he hears you call him baby, his fingers dig in tighter. So tight it almost hurts. 

“Don't beat yourself up like this, please.” 

He surprises you when he speaks, “you...you're-” he swallows, “-you’re so wet.” 

His hands are shaking, and you feel the teensiest buck of his hips. His eyes meet yours, he is amazed, he is dumbfounded, he is over the fucking moon.

“I did this to you…” he licks his lips, “and you let me” 

His hands move from your thighs to your hips, digging into your soft flesh as he lets out a strangled moan. The sound of resolution. Followed by a desperate thrust deep inside you, to say you moaned would be an understatement. You howled. Generally you would make sure to keep quiet, with the other cabins all within earshot, but for some reason (an impossibility you cannot comprehend) your joining feels comforting. Like seeing an old friend in a new town, or tasting a childhood dish later in life. Komaeda feels like coming home.

He thrusts again and you fall forward, planting your palms on either side of his head. His eyes are scrunched shut, the cutest furrow between his brows. Something in his expression twists, his smile becomes wild and the pads of his fingers are replaced with nails digging into you. It hurts, but you just moan louder. Encouraging him, you really need to stop encouraging him. One day Komaeda is going to go fucking supernova and you’re going with him. You can’t tell the future but it feels like an inevitability, like it has already happened and will happen again. 

Even under the blanket of night, the island’s tropical heat never ceases. A bead of sweat makes its way down your spine, a kiss to Komaeda’s shoulder tastes like salt. The single bed creaks and groans as he grinds up into you, mouth hung open as he laughs and moans. You sit up, freeing a hand to slip down to your clit and your breath hitches at the feeling. Komaeda’s eyes snap open at the sound, and he follows your arm down to where you are touching yourself. Then down further. You feel him throb when he gets a good look at the spot where he enters you. His eyes are wide, his hands on your hips shake. 

Then he thrusts up again, slower and deeper. Transfixed at the way he disappears inside you. You circle your clit, faster and looser, hips stuttering every time he bottoms out inside. Your head lolls back as you moan again, grabbing one of his hands and intertwining your fingers together. 

“I’m going to come soon.” You force out, rolling your hips forward again. 

Komaeda hisses air in through his teeth and you notice his thrusts are getting sloppy, “m-me too…”

You smile, there’s one last thing you want from him, “look at me.” 

His eyes meet yours and you can feel a moment of panic, a cacophony of trash trash trash screaming behind his eyes. You press a hand to his cheek. 

“Just let go.” You whisper, “I’m right here.” 

He takes a deep breath and just pounds you. The coil in your belly is growing tighter and tighter, his hips pumping faster and faster. His eyes are squeezed shut and he’s biting his lip so hard that it bleeds. He’s a vision, he should be hung up in the fucking louvre.

Then with a strangled moan, his eyes snap open and you come. Both of you, and you can feel it all.

It’s like a snap of tension. A rope untied. The highest note in your favourite song. 

And he loves you 

He loves you loves you loves you

You slump forward, limp from the exertion. Komaeda is panting quietly and one of his hands slowly reaches around your shoulders. Even after all that, he is still hesitant to touch you. You kiss his temple, and then-

DING DONG BING BONG

Your eyes snap open. It’s still too dark for that to be the morning announcement, and that can only mean- 

Komaeda stiffens below you, thinking the same thing when Monokuma makes the second worst announcement he possibly could.

“e-HEM! Hey suckers, don’t get your panties in a twist no one is dead. Just thought I would do the polite thing and let you all know that the Ultimate Lucky Student and the Ultimate Empath just GOT IT ON!” 

“fucking hell…” you muttered, but the bear wasn’t done.

“AND AND AND AND! They didn’t even practice safe sex!!!! I must have failed you as a teacher. So! Tomorrow morning I’ll be giving the class a demonstration! So maybe the next two rowdy kids will be a little more responsible! Anyway sweet dreams!”

[fanfictionwritingoddity]

𝙎𝙪𝙣 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙈𝙤𝙤𝙣

 ( 𝙽𝚎𝚓𝚒 𝙷𝚢𝚞𝚞𝚐𝚊 𝚡 𝙵𝚎𝚖!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 )

Neji Hyuuga was always so traditional. You supposed it was a trait deriving from being a part of one of the great ninja clans. Even when you met him at the tender age of thirteen, his behavior had been nothing short of disciplined. Back then you thought he was an uptight asshole who needed to be knocked down a few notches. You were sure he knew this, but still, the ever stoic until snarky boy had made no comment on it.

After a year of your team and Guy’s team collaborating, you began to learn more about Neji. His character developed in your mind from that of a stuck-up jackass to... someone else. Lonely, filled with a longing to be free, with a pinch of anger. Your mind had swirled and twisted, attempting to make sense of the boy who grew on you so quickly. 

Trapped. Neji was trapped. Sealed into a fate he had no choice in from birth. He was lonely. Friends had never come easy, but he wasn’t even sure if there was a point in making them. Cracks began to form in his perfectly crafted persona, inklings of emotion you thought you would never find leaking through.

He reminded you of the moon. So adored and appreciated by all of the stars around him but still so, so alone. The Hyuuga had a unique glow, one of a kind in its nature, coveted and abused. Like the moon, Neji was jealous of those who could so easily find partnership in their surroundings. 

So, you released those petty pent up feelings. You had been kind to him in the past year, sure, but there was always the underlying aggression that you had done your best to suppress. The next two years spent within the presence of your fellow ninja were different. You began to understand everything about him. The things that made Neji tick, the traits he had inherited, and his formation as a person. 

To him, you were the sun. A girl with an ethereal shine that flowed through every fiber of her being. Shining on each and every person you interacted with, Neji felt undeserving of such a privilege. The boy felt that your kindness and tolerance was better wasted on some other pitiful case, his having been closed since his first breath in this world.

He knew that you had started off hating him. Most people did. Everyone who ever laid eyes on the brown haired male passed judgement before he could even meet their gaze. Carefully creating his character the way that he did was a double-edged sword. On one hand, it allowed him the solitude he forced himself to crave. On the other, it pushed away any chance at finding companionship.

Except for you.

You had given him another chance. As if you had x-ray vision, you had been able to see right through Neji’s terrible excuse for a defense. And instead of laughing, instead of continuing to feel any sort of disdain for him, you gave him a clean slate. Your change in behavior coaxed the Hyuuga to begin to open up. Like a flower just beginning to bloom, petal by petal and word by word, you learned more of the boy who was oh so traditional.

And you fell. Hard.

You couldn’t help yourself. Neji’s words had a way of inching themselves into your heart and settling, comfortably making their home there. His rare words of support and gentle encouragement tattooed themselves in your mind, leaving a trail of butterflies in their wake. Sixteen now, these feelings were becoming much more prominent in your life, affecting your day to day tasks when paired up with Neji. You hoped he didn’t notice, but the realization that he most likely did was daunting in nature.

Of course Neji noticed.

How could he not? Your face heated and heart sped up whenever he was close to you, your knees just slightly beginning to shake and your eyes straining to look anywhere but him. For some odd reason, your adoration towards him made him feel... happy? Unused to these emotions himself, he had done much research on what could have caused them to arise.

Neji Hyuuga was in love with you.

Your existence brought color to a world that he had sworn would always be grayscale in tone. The boy had learned more about himself from you than he could’ve ever hoped to learn anywhere else. He learned that his favorite color was the shade of your hair and his favorite sound was the chime of your giggle. The weather he loved most was when it was slightly breezy but warm, because you always seemed to enjoy those days more than others.

It was a breezy summer night when he had chosen to confess the feelings that had been eating away at him for a year. Now that he thought about it, Neji was sure they had been there before, but only recently had he given them a name.

You had been invited out to the field by Neji, assuming it was for some late night training. A gentle breeze tickled the tree leaves, touching your cheek softly as it danced by. Crickets chirped their greetings and conversations, fireflies beginning to blink in the distance. The moon was full tonight, you observed. Not a cloud was in sight, and the stars had just began to peek their way through the twilight blanketing the sky.

Warmth blossomed in your chest as you remembered the days when the two of you would train all evening, only to pass out in the tall grass under the landscape of the night. You thought for a moment, wondering if you had understood how enamored you were with the Hyuuga at that point in time. Gravel crunched under your feet as you approached the field.

It seemed Neji had arrived first. His white, lavender tinted orbs were trained on the sky above. Taking a second to stare at the man, you swore if you squinted you could see the outline of the boy he used to be, so closed off and silent. Sensing you, Neji tilted his head your direction and traced his gaze to your face.

You waved, a smile on your lips as you made your way over to him. The long grass tickled your legs, wrapping around them as if to try and halt you in your pursuit. Small dots of black flashed in the undergrowth as crickets leapt away from your steps.

“The moon is beautiful tonight.”

Carefully chosen words left your mouth, eyes trained on the glowing orb. Neji didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to. You knew by the way he followed your gaze and by the slight upturn of his lips that he agreed. For a moment, everything was tranquil and quiet. The sky reveled in your undivided attention, twinkling and shining with all of its might.

“Y/N, what exactly are we?”

Blinking in surprise, blood began to rush to your cheeks. Bravery was necessary for your answer, and it took a bit to muster it all up. You turned to the man beside you, heart speeding in your chest as you responded.

“What.. do you want us to be?”

Neji seemed taken aback by your question, as if he had expected for you to be the one with the answer. Red crept to the tips of his ears and his cheeks. His throat suddenly felt dry, parched by the heat of confrontation of years of feelings.

“I would like to court you. I.. I mean. I would like.. for you.. to be my girlfriend.”

His answer was awkward, eyes glancing to the side as they swept over everything except your face. You knew he was trying, and your stomach twisted with butterflies. The confession was everything you had hoped for and more. You wished the young girl that had been so off-put by the Hyuuga’s presence could see you now, nearly combusting over his feelings.

“I would like that. A lot.”

With those words, you moved forward, pressing a kiss against Neji’s lips. He kissed back instantly, as if your moves had been premeditated. It felt like fire and ice had clashed, but instead of creating destruction, something new and amazing had been made. The kiss was sloppy, inexperienced and filled with unknown passion and feelings, but it was perfect.

And it was yours.

[solaris-writing]

Title: In the Lanterns Glow

Character: Xiao

Word Count: 1,501

A/N: Listen to “Cosmic Love” by Florence and the Machine (it’s a lovely song). This is also my first real post, so be kind!

The lanterns engulfed the harbor, hundreds upon hundreds of little golden stars lighting up the indigo sky. Liyue had faithfully performed the tradition for centuries. Longer than I was alive (or remembered at least) or as long as Paimon could remember. The townspeople flooded the squares and the docks, lighting more lanterns to release into the sky. Some had crowded upon boats and ships to let off their own. Food stalls had been set up, games for the children to play and alcohol for the adults.

I didn’t take part in the festivities though. I felt like I would be invading some kind of ancient ritual. Even then, I was leaving for Mondstadt in the morning. Jean had a few things she wanted to go over in order for me to become a full Knight of Favonius, not just an honorary one. After the whole incident with Dvalin and Barbatos, it wasn’t the first time that the idea had come up. Even Kaeya had campaigned for it.

So I stood above the harbor, sitting on one of the hills overlooking the city. For the first time in a long time, I was at peace. Not fighting hilichurls, not on the road for my next commission, or searching for work at the Adventurers’ Guild.

Paimon had fluttered away, searching for a food stall that had grilled chicken and mushrooms (she heard a townsfolk raving about it earlier and she just had to try it out). So I was left alone.

I saw a flash of aqua, a short burst of color in the night. Several yards ahead of me stood Liyue’s Adeptus. He looked over his city, weapon at his side. Xiao almost looked mournful, amber eyes alight with a burning melancholy.

“Xiao?” I gently called out, jumping down from my post to join him. He didn’t respond, but I knew he was paying attention.

We descended into a peaceful, relaxed silence as the lanterns continued to float into the endless horizon. Even though the opening act was over, more lanterns were being lit and the party had just begun.

“I’ve seen this sight many times.” He mumbled, “Yet, it still amazes me.”

It felt strange sometimes. I was standing next to an ancient being. A being that had seen so much bloodshed and battle. A being that had seen the seasons change time and time over, seen the generations pass by and celestial creatures wither into nothingness. It made me feel so small and yet so significant.

When I first met Xiao, he didn’t speak a word to me. I barely got a nod. Now, he felt comfortable enough to let me stand by him and watch the lanterns.

I feel like being immortal is the greatest curse of all.

Yet, I felt special. He could have been anywhere else in Teyvat at that moment, yet he chose to spend it with me in Liyue, watching the celebrations.

“I’ve never seen these before. It makes Mondstant look bland.” I said, eyes flitting about over the festivities. “I wouldn’t mind seeing this again.” The red of the buildings was turned blood red and the golden of the streetlights was nearly blinding. It was much different than the stone and wooden buildings that predominated in Mondstat.

“Speaking of Mondstat, Paimon and I are heading back tomorrow morning. First thing. The Acting Master wants to have a meeting with me. I have no business here anymore.” I said, fiddling with my hands just to give me something to do.

I felt the change in his demeanor. It was a small and subtle one, but I knew it was there.

“Ah.” That was all he said, but I knew he wanted to say more.

“You don’t have to hold your tongue around me.” I explained, turning to glance at him.

“I’m not, mortal.”

That stung as if he just struck me. He hadn’t called me mortal in a while. He did when he first met me, when he was still scared and thought that I would just be another human passing by in his eons of life. He never thought that I would stick around for long. His tone of voice was much different than his previous. He had returned back to his cold, distant personality when we first met.

Gods.

He was right though. I was just a mortal, while he was something that my mind couldn’t even comprehend.

Xiao was brash and careless and selfish and had a superiority complex that had built for thousands of years. He was rude and prideful and needed to get knocked down a few pegs, even if he was an Adeptus and a Yaksha. But he was also surprisingly kind, protective, and made it his eternal life’s mission to deliver justice and guard those who could not protect themselves. To protect Liyue.

He was hauntingly beautiful.

And I loved him for it.

And that’s why I had to leave.

Mondstat was the furthest place from him, as far as I could go in terms of civilization. I’d become a Knight of Favonius and continue working up north with the rest of them. I’d have to leave behind the handsome man that I had come to admire. I’d pick up the pieces of myself and move on. That was best for the both of us.

I sighed deeply, fingers clenching around my satchel like a lifeline as I turned to leave. I needed to find Paimon anyway. It would give me something to think about other than my breaking heart.

“Don’t leave,” I heard a soft plea, his voice raspy and croaky and wet with tears. I looked over, heart clenching with a pain much greater than any physical wound I’d had before.

Even tearful and yearning, Xiao still looked like a dream. His amber eyes were brimming with tears, cheeks a little flushed with pink, and a quavering voice. He stared up at me, tears threatening to brim over his lids and onto his cheeks made of porcelain. This man called himself a monster, an animal that was undeserving of love and didn’t know how to love. This man had killed and destroyed and ruined. Yet he turned into a puddle in my hands.

“Please don’t leave me too.”

I couldn’t take it anymore and I lurched forward when the first tears came down. I wiped them away as quickly as I could, hands moving over his face as if I couldn’t find a place to put them. He reached up to touch them, like he was surprised at his own tears and my willingness.

Xiao’s eyes were red now as I pulled him into my chest. “I won’t go. I won’t.”

I felt the first signs of a sob building in his throat, so I held him closer. Tighter.

Holding his head to my chest, I enveloped him in a crushing hug that I hoped conveyed all that I felt. I was overflowing with emotion. It was burning a hole in the middle of my chest and if I spoke, I felt as if they were going to pour out of my mouth like water. That I wouldn’t be able to stop it.

Gods, this man was going to be the death of me.

“I won’t. I’ll never leave. Never.” I cooed, sighing as he curled up to me.

“I love you.”

All I could hear was my pulse in my ears. My heart wanted to leap from its cavity. My hands shook and I felt like my entire body was just going to drift away. I didn’t know how long it had been since he said those three words, but I was shocked out of my reverie. It all came flooding back to me, like I had been jerked out of a restful sleep.

Xiao had gone still, breathing uneasily against my shoulder.

“I love you too.” I murmured, “Oh my gods, Xiao, I love you too.”

It was all out in the open now.

Never in my wildest dreams that I thought that I would be standing here with him, covering his blushing face with milk and honey kisses. I even managed to get a little giggle out of him. At least it's a start.

So I stood over Liyue, lit up with the love from its citizens and the lanterns’ glow. Watching the children run in the streets and the adults celebrate their freedom and their guardians. My heart was full, my mind was at peace, and my arms were occupied by holding my still sniffling Adeptus.

All those weeks of pining, now that I look back on it as I glance at the silver ring on my hand, was all worth it. As long as I was with my man made of memories.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Footnotes:

So, that was a trip, but there is it.