#chapter and ending up alone and depressed and now it's happening again' LIKE EXCUSE ME | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lightandheatao3 · 1 year ago

Text

The Bunker - Criminal Minds

Chapter 4: The Question

Summary: Spencer Reid wakes up in a locked bunker to find half the current BAU and two of its departed members unconscious on the floor. The old team is back together but the reunion is not what any of them would have wished for. An Unsub from their past has decided it's time they all stop keeping secrets, even if it means exposing them by force.

Hotch and Derek have been pulled back into a world they tried to escape. Emily, Rossi, and JJ are doing their best to keep it together. Spencer is falling apart.

AKA a found family is reunited and forced to go through the most nightmarish version of family therapy imaginable.

Set months after the end of Criminal Minds: Evolution. Evolution referenced, but not necessary to understand the story.

Chapter Summary: Tensions rise as time in the bunker drags on.

Read chapter 4 on AO3 or under the cut. All comments and reblogs are extremely appreciated <3

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

“Come on man, get up.”

“What’s the point?” whined Spencer.

“The point is that muscles start to atrophy after 3 days of inactivity, and you have been holed up on that disgusting mattress for… what… like a week and half now? Longer than you should’ve been,” said Derek.

Spencer groaned. “I’ve been a bit sick, if you haven’t noticed.”

“Which is why we’ve left you alone, but you’re so goddamn shaky and thin you’re starting to resemble a chihuahua. You need to keep active, or you will just get sicker. That’s true for all of us,” he insisted.

“Come on, it’s simple calisthenics. No worse than you had to do at the academy,” said Emily, entirely too chipper.

“I hated doing it back then, too,” he said. “I would really rather never move again, thanks.”

“Of course you want to sleep all day,” said Derek. “It’s called clinical depression, Reid. It’s what happens when you replace your brain’s ability to self-regulate pleasure with heroin. You’re gonna be all fucked up for a while, but you’ll level out eventually. And you know what’s proven to be one of the most effective treatments for depression? Exercise! So get your ass up,” he ordered, nudging the mattress with his foot.

“Okay, okay, I get it. Just don’t complain when I pass out after 5 minutes,” he said, dragging himself up.

The last thing he wanted was to be roped into an extended conversation about the questionable state of his mental health.

“I’ll consider it 5 minutes well spent,” Derek said, reaching a hand down to help him to his feet.

Emily corralled them all into two lines while JJ placed herself at the front of the room, ready to lead the workout.

“Frankly, I’m with you, kid,” Rossi whispered, looking pointedly unhappy about the whole situation.

“Shut it,” said Emily.

Hotch smirked. “Pick your battles, boys.”

“Just you wait until it’s my turn to run the class tomorrow,” said Derek, positioned feet shoulder width apart and ready to go in the front line with Emily. “You’ll be begging to go back to this moment”

Rossi and Spencer both whinged, but they shaped up and did their best to mirror JJ’s movements when she called them to attention.

Spencer did not pass out, but he did make it almost precisely 5 minutes before having to very rapidly excuse himself to go throw up. After a few retches, he collapsed back onto the floor of the tiny en-suit, half curled around the toilet.

Rossi ducked his head in. “You doing alight? Need some help?”

“Just… just let me lie here for a minute.”

“Are you sure you don’t need me to stay with you?” he persisted.

“Get back in here, Rossi!” ordered Emily.

With a swear that was barely concealed under his breath, he left Spencer to languish on the floor.

A few minutes later he hauled himself out and retook his place in the group. Nobody said anything, but Derek had an annoyingly self satisfied smile. He only made it through another few exercises before he had to stop in earnest, but, as loathed as he was to admit it, he felt a tiny bit better. Emotionally, if not physically.

Emily, JJ and Derek all sat by him. Rossi had first dibs on the bathroom to wash his clothes and Hotch… well, he was sitting cross legged on the far side of the room meditating.

Spencer didn’t know if he was actually meditating, or if he just wanted to be left alone.

He’d warmed up to them all since they had been in the bunker. In fact he was almost warmer and friendlier than he had been when they were all still close. Or, maybe not friendlier, but gentle somehow, in a way Spencer had never seen him be with anyone but Jack and Beth before.

Still, he kept a distance from them. Even when they were talking, he could feel the invisible wall.

Not that Spencer was judging. He had plenty of his own walls.

“I know you feel like garbage, Spence, but you’re doing a lot better,” said JJ, looking pleased.

“Better than what?” he scoffed.

“Better than when you were pumping your veins full of dope every day,” suggested Derek, lying on the floor in front of where Spencer and the girls were siting, clasping his hands behind his head casually and putting his feet up against the wall.

Spencer narrowed his eyes, a flash of irritation at the lackadaisical attitude. “That’s an interesting philosophical debate. Do you really think I’d be worse off high in my apartment than soberly held captive by an Unsub?”

Derek tapped his foot thoughtfully. “I think, and correct me if I’m wrong here boy genius, those are not the only two options in the world.”

“Please, Morgan, if we make it out of here alive will you teach me how to be as virtuous as you?” he said sarcastically.

“Enough, both of you,” said Emily when Derek leaned his head up to argue back. “Spencer, stop scratching, you’re going to get an infection.”

He looked at her quizzically for a split second before realizing what she meant. He had been scratching at his arms without even noticing. He stopped, slinging them both over his knees instead.

The most recent track marks were scabbed over and the extra sensory sensitivity after withdrawal was making them itch like crazy.

It’s funny how quickly he’d gotten used to them seeing him like this. He was still in his singlet and pajama pants most of the time, the long sleeve shirt functioning more as a pillow than an item of clothing these days.

The others were the same, with everyone comfortably sitting around in their underwear when waiting for their clothes to dry. They’d all spent enough time in hotel rooms together over the years not to be precious about that sort of thing.

None of them even balked at the track marks anymore. They’d gotten used to them. He didn’t know how he felt about that.

He’d always hated having to hide and having them be so delicate about the subject of his addiction, but now they were infuriatingly direct. Far from walking on eggshells, they were stomping as brashly as they pleased. Especially Derek.

It was really starting to piss him off.

That might have been because literally everything was pissing him off since detoxing.

He tried not to feel too bad about it. He wasn’t the only one who’d been a bit snippy. The complete absence of privacy and personal space wasn’t doing any of them any favors.

“Can I ask you something?” asked JJ, catching his eye.

He sighed. “I’m not going to like this, am I?”

“Probably not,” she admitted.

A beat. “You can ask.”

She looked him up and down. Emily was glancing between them, and Derek had cracked an eye open.

“What happened two years ago?” she asked gently. “Why did you start using again?”

He was surprised it took them this long. He’d been waiting for them to interrogate him on the subject since the second that goddamn note was read out.

This wasn’t a conversation he wanted to have. It wasn’t one he knew how to have.

“Nothing happened,” he said softly.

“I don’t believe that.”

“Addicts relapse, JJ. An estimated 88% of all heroin addicts relapse within 1 to 3 years of quitting. I know you all think I’m different somehow, like I’m supposed to be smarter than that. That’s not how it works.”

He didn’t mean to sound harsh, but even he could hear the bite in his voice by the end. There was a little part of him that resented them for even being surprised at his relapse, as if there was something about him that precluded him from that kind of indignity. It was misdirected and he knew it.

“That’s not what I’m saying,” said JJ defensively. “If you don’t want to talk about it just say so.”

Before he could apologize to her, Derek chimed in with, “It’s what I’m saying.” He sat up. “You’re right, Reid, you are supposed to be smarter than this.”

“Thanks, Morgan. Invite me to the ceremony when they give you a Nobel prize for fixing the opioid epidemic.”

Derek folded his arms and continued as if Spencer hadn’t said anything. “You didn’t choose to be an addict, but you did choose to do it alone. If you hadn’t cut yourself off from all of us when you relapsed, we would have helped you. You chose to keep pretending everything was fine while it spiraled out of control. Every time we talked, every time you visited, I asked you what was happening in your life, and you chose to lie. For someone so goddamn smart, you've been making a lot of incredibly stupid choices.”

Hotch had opened his eyes and Rossi had re-emerged from the bathroom still holding a soapy, wet shirt in his hands.

Spencer and Derek had both stood up and Spencer wasn’t even sure when they’d done it.

Emily didn’t intervene this time. Apparently, they were doing this.

“You’re right, I didn’t ask for your help and I don’t want it now!” He took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. Through gritted teeth he said, “I am grateful to you all for getting me through withdrawal and I am sorry I put you through that. Can’t that be enough for now? We clearly have bigger problems than this.”

“No.”

“No?” he said indignantly.

“No. Why won't you talk about this? What could you possibly have to say that’s worse than what we already know?” Derek demanded, volume rising with every word.

“I don't want to talk about it because I know what you want me to say! You want me to tell you that if we get out of here I’m going to get treatment and go to meetings and pinkie promise I’ll never use narcotics again,” Spencer said, matching his volume and emphasizing the words with a wave of his hand.

“The only thing I want is for you to tell me the fucking truth!”

“No, you don’t!”

“Yes, I do! I don’t care how bleak it is, just for one fucking second be honest about what you want!”

“The truth is I don’t want to do this!” shouted Spencer. “If I had heroin, I would shoot up right now, right here in this fucking room while you watched. Are you happy? Is that what you wanted to hear? I don’t want to be fixed!”

“Why not?” yelled Derek.

They stared at each other, both breathing heavily. Spencer had been staring directly into his eyes for far longer than he would normally be able, fueled by adrenaline.

He caught glimpse of something behind the anger that in another circumstance he might have missed.

Helplessness.

Oh.

Derek wasn’t mad.

He was terrified.

The realization hit him like a physical blow.

Spencer stared at him, opening his mouth but not finding any words.

“Why don’t you want us to help? Why don’t you want to be fixed? What the hell happened to you?” pleaded the closest thing he’d ever had to a brother. “What’s your plan when we get out of here? You wanna go be a junkie, dead in a year? You had 15 years clean, man. Why are you doing this?”

His eyes burned, moisture pooling in the corners. Why? Why was he doing this?

What answer could ever satisfy them?

The air between them filled with poisonous silence.

Out of the silence came a voice, too small for him to make out the words. Derek held his gaze, fighting tears of his own, but asked to someone to the side, “What did you say?”

“It wasn’t 15 years,” said JJ, louder this time.

Another shiver of panic worked its way down Spencer’s spine.

“What are you talking about?” demanded Derek.

“He said ‘times.’ When we first got the note. He said we weren’t there the other times he went through withdrawal. Plural.”

Fuck. Why could he never just say the right thing?

Derek squared off, lifting a hand to wipe under his eyes. “JJ’s right, isn’t she.” He wasn’t shouting anymore. When Spencer didn't answer, he took it as all the confirmation he needed. “Was it after prison?”

He shot a brief look off at the others, silently urging them to step in and save him.

JJ wouldn’t look at him. She looked small. He never wanted to do this to her.

Hotch was eyeing him like he was trying to solve the puzzle of what bits of Spencer Reid had been irreparably broken in his absence. Prison had certainly done some damage that couldn’t be undone.

He looked back at Derek. “No. That was… It was hard, but no.”

“So, when?” he asked, cocking his head, waiting for Spencer to give him something concrete to fight about.

He looked back at JJ, who still wouldn’t meet his eye.

She already knew.

“Oh no,” said Emily softly, putting it together. “It was after I faked my death to hide from Doyle.”

He was torn between Derek and JJ, and all the other people in this room who his deficiencies kept hurting.

Their fight after it was revealed that JJ knew Emily was alive had almost destroyed their friendship. In retrospect, he understood she was doing the best she could with horrible circumstances, trying to protect Emily.

He also knew, equally certain, that he would have told her. If the situations were reversed and she came to his door, crying, grieving, on the verge of a breakdown, he would have told her.

She knew it, too.

He was aware that she still held tightly onto that guilt. He regretted so badly the way he’d treated her when he first found out. He never wanted to tell her this. Never.

He turned away from Derek, who was still staring at him like he’d ripped his heart out of his chest.

“JJ, please talk to me.”

He stepped forward, putting his hands on her arms. She looked up at him, red eyed and exhausted.

“You told me you didn’t use. You only thought about it,” she said, sounding numb. “I believed you. Except… I think I just wanted to believe you.”

“I’m sorry.” He pulled her into a hug. She held onto him tightly. “You did the right thing back then. My actions weren’t your fault.”

The moment was over as quickly and horribly as it began when the chamber on the door banged.

Of course this interruption couldn't have come minutes earlier when he desperately needed it.

A gloved hand reached in to deposit a brown paper bag.

Derek was slow to react, not running to the door in his usual effort to ingratiate himself to their captor through one sided conversation.

When nobody moved, the interrupted outbreak of truth and consequences weighing them down too heavily, Hotch stepped towards the door.

He moved slowly, deliberately, as if one muscle twitching out of place would set off a bomb. Spencer wasn’t sure where he thought the explosion might be coming from.

When Hotch opened the chamber and extracted the brown paper bag, he stared at it. Not moving, just staring down at the thing he was holding, presumably filled with more fruit. Nobody else moved. Nobody spoke.

In one swift and vicious action, Hotch flung the bag across the room!

Fruit scattered over the concrete in a colorful arc. An overripe peach splattered on the far wall.

They all flinched at the sudden act, but before anyone could talk, Hotch had rounded on the camera in the roof with its infuriating, endlessly blinking red light.

He spoke low, dangerous. “When we get out of here, and we will, I’m going to kill you myself. Forget life in prison, I will put you down like a fucking dog.”

Spencer sucked in a sharp breath, not realizing he’d been holding it. JJ was gripping his arm tight enough to cut off circulation. He let her. The room was cavernous, quiet, oppressive.

Hotch clenched and unclenched his fists. Emily stepped forward, mouth open, a hand outstretched towards his shoulder but not bold enough to actually touch him, yet he pulled away from her as if she had.

“I’m fine,” he snapped. He took in a ragged breath, scrubbing his hands over his face, then lowered them. This time, calmer: “I’m fine.”

He looked around the room at the scattered fruit. With another deep breath, he bent down and started gathering it up. Emily stepped forward to help him.

Spencer, JJ, and Derek exchanged looks. Spencer knew they would not be dropping the subject forever, but for now they settled on an agitated, embarrassed truce. Well, Spencer was embarrassed. Derek might just have been agitated.

Had he really said, out loud, that he would shoot up in front of them if he had to? He was almost certain he would actually follow through with that given the choice. There's almost nothing he wouldn't do to get high at this point. Withdrawal and being stuck in the bunker had only made his cravings stronger.

He had certainly not intended to tell them that, though.

The three of them broke away, moving to help Hotch and Emily. JJ grabbed the paper bag for them to consolidate the food, while Derek moved to clean the peach that was dripping down the wall.

As Hotch dropped his handful of citrus and apples into the bag JJ was holding, he paused. The rest of the room paused too, waiting to see what he would do.

“It was my call to keep everyone in the dark about Prentiss. It was cruel to put that on you.” He looked around at the rest of them. “It was cruel to all of you.”

“You did what you thought was right,” said Spencer. He locked eyes with JJ. “Both of you did.”

Hotch eyed him off, picking him apart in a way that made Spencer want to bury his face in his hands like a little kid, desperate not to be seen. He resisted the urge.

“You still don’t believe it was the right call,” said Hotch eventually, a statement not a question.

Spencer frowned. “No,” he said honestly. “But I know you believed it. That’s enough for me.”

Hotch shook his head. Clearly, it wasn’t enough for him.

Emily looked between all of them, grey hair falling oddly prettily over her shoulders as she swiveled her head. “I mean, if we want to play the blame game, it’s really my fault for keeping you all in the dark about Doyle,” she pointed out. “Or Doyle’s fault for creating the whole mess. We can go even deeper. In a round about way, it’s really my mother’s fault I got into intelligence in the first place. We can all blame my mother! Trust me, it’s one of my favorite pastimes. It’s cathartic. Go ahead,” she encouraged.

Derek laughed. Even JJ cracked a smile.

“I really dislike your mother, so this is compelling,” deadpanned Hotch.

Emily chuckled. “Yeah, she hates you too buddy.” To the room at large she said, “I know we’re all going a bit crazy in here, but everything we’re feeling has to be secondary to the ultimate goal of getting out. I’ve been thinking about that, and-”

“Emily,” said Rossi, wet, half-washed shirt sitting discarded on the floor, forming a puddle.

Spencer hadn't even registered that he hadn't spoken or helped with the cleanup, caught up in the interpersonal drama as he was.

Emily looked at Rossi quizzically.

Spencer’s blood ran cold. It was crumpled from having been tossed across the room with the rest of the bag’s contents.

Rossi held a folded piece of paper in his hand. With it, a photograph, the edge of which was just sticking out between the folds. He offered it to Emily. “Sorry,” he said sympathetically. “Looks like you’re up.”

#criminal minds #criminal minds evolution #criminal minds fandom #criminal minds fic #spencer reid angst #emily prentiss #derek morgan #aaron hotchner #bau team #bau team as family #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid #spencer reid fic

24 notes · View notes

ash5monster01 · 1 year ago

Text

Goes On Chapter Eleven

Pairing: Charlie Dalton x OC!FemReader

Warnings: 18+, depression, mentions of suicide, heavy topics, eventual smut, slow burn romance, fluff, gender themes/stereotypes.

Summary: Against his best efforts Charlie has to start at a new preparatory school after the tragic events that took place at Welton. The very events that led to the loss of his best friend and getting expelled in the first place. He has no plans to make friends let alone get close to anyone ever again. That is until he meets Evelyn and her interesting group of friends. No matter how hard he tries to push them away he finds it to be impossible. So he caves and in the end learns that life can still be enjoyable even if it feels like everyone is against you.

word count: 2.8k

Ten ←→ Twelve

Masterlist

Ridge Academy, NY

2/20/60

When Evelyn wakes up the next morning the smile on her face is still wide. She had never really known what this feeling would be like. That feeling you get when you like someone and they just so happen to like you back. It made you feel brand new, refreshed, hopeful. Which may explain why getting up so early on a Saturday hadn’t bothered her like it normally would. Instead she turns off her alarm on the first ring and makes her way to the showers with that beaming grin.

It’s not long until she’s dressed in a simple floral dress, thankful they weren’t required school uniforms on the weekend. When she adds a little more makeup than normal she excuses it as feeling experimental but honestly she just wanted Charlie to look at her with those eyes that he always does. The eyes that make her squirm in her seat while she feels every nerve ending go off in her body. In fact she’s glad him finally kissing her last night didn’t entirely short circuit her brain.

“You’re forgetting something” Violet grins behind her in the reflection of the mirror and Evelyn furrows her eyebrows as she looks back at her.

“What?” she questions, eyebrows pulled together tightly. She inspects her face quickly, worried she had messed something up or missed and Violet just laughs.

“If you’re gonna put all that effort into your makeup you might as well cover up that neck” Violet says, hand reaching to tip her neck up and reveal the dark red mark right above her throat. Evelyn gasps in an instant, eyes now trained on the spot that is very visibly now that she’s paying attention. Her stomach drops at the idea of other students seeing it as they roam the halls today.

“Shit” she mutters, hands fumbling through the makeup on her desk in search of anything that could possibly cover it up. Violet quickly sets a hand on her own, stopping the girl from stressing too much.

“Calm down and let me help” Violet tells her, grabbing her own chair and pulling it next to hers. Evelyn tries to calm as the girl gets to work, hands grabbing the makeup and focusing her attention to the mark.

“How do you know what to do?” Evelyn asks after a beat, her heart rate now at a normal and soft thump. Violet just giggles at the question as she glances up from her neck and into her eyes.

“When Marty and I first got together he would always leave marks on accident, I got pretty good at covering them up and now I just make sure he leaves them where others can’t see” she says, suggestion in her tone and eyebrows raised which makes Evelyn laugh loudly at the notion.

“It was my first real kiss” Evelyn whispers, recalling the two other times she had barely pecked a boy and felt nothing but regret in her stomach. Instead she kissed a boy hard and good and in return the butterflies hadn’t left her stomach yet.

“He’s good for you and I’m pretty sure you’re good for him too. Hell, he would barely talk to us when he started, and now I can’t get rid of the guy” Violet teases and Evelyn laughs again, admiring the black hair that cascades down her friends back as she works on fixing her neck up.

“I’m just so nervous, I don’t really know what this means for us. I wasn’t even really planning on kissing him but he just showed up at the door and I couldn’t help myself” Evelyn says, softly shaking her head and using the brunette curls falling forward to hide her face. Violet just smiles, leaning back as she checks over her work.

“It means he likes you, and you like him. Don’t let the pressure of others and their expectations ruin what you guys already got. Just cherish it and the rest will happen on its own” she tells her, recalling all the times people had judged her and Marty for getting together so young. At least they had stayed together the whole time, a testament that each of those people were wrong.

“And if he doesn’t want to date me?” Evelyn voices her worries and Violet just gives her a soft smile, knowing how long her best friend waited to feel this way about someone, to stop feeling broken because she couldn’t have crushes like other girls.

“He does, but if not he’s an idiot and I’ll kill him” Violet deadpans and Evelyn is laughing again, heart easing due to her best friends words and the she’s wrapping the raven haired girl into a hug.

“Thanks V” she tells her honestly and Violet hugs right back, enjoying the time alone they have together within this dorm. “Now, how does my neck look?” Evelyn asks pulling back and lifting her chin for Violet to investigate.

“As good as it’s gonna get” she tells her, knowing no makeup in the world was ever that successful at covering any mark left by a silly lovestruck boy. Evelyn turns to the mirror to find it much better than before but the shadow of it still there. Accepting her fate she stands and joins the girl.

“Let’s get breakfast then” she tells her and the girls are off in search of their friends and Saturday morning pancakes which was the only good reason for getting up so early on a Saturday around here. Plus Evelyn wanted to get a head start on planning the spring sport fundraisers before she had a meeting that more than likely only Charlie would show up too.

The closer the pair got to the dining hall the more nervous Evelyn became. She wasn’t used to being nervous like this but for the first time in her life she was going to face a boy she liked and not only liked but had kissed just last night. Her cheeks were already burning red just thinking about it and Violet just shook her head as the two walked through the lunch line and headed for their table that held all of their friends.

“Morning” Marty beamed as the two girls joined them. Evelyn felt her heart drop as she realized Charlie wasn’t there. Nate saw the disappointed look in her eyes and felt jealousy twist in his gut as she moved to sit beside him.

“Heard you got caught sneaking to Marty’s room last night” Laurie teases, eyes twinkling with amusement as she looks at Nate who had told them about how him and Charlie had spotted the girl.

“Better the boys than Mr. Holly” Violet said with a shrug, taking a bite of pancake and grinning around the fork.

“Seems like everyone had a bit of fun last night” Laurie grins, eyes landing on Evelyn. The thing about Laurie is she notices everything, observes everyone and everything around her. The evident disappointment, red cheeks, and half visible hickey on the girls neck were all immediately noticed by the blonde girl. Her awareness is what made her the queen of drama at Ridge.

“What?” Evelyn gapes, getting more nervous as everyone at the table begins to stare at her. Laurie just smiles, leaning against Marty to reach for the girl across the table, manicured nails turning her chin upwards and as the bruise is revealed to everyone Marty snorts, coughing around his food.

“Holy shit, Ev’s got a hickey” he says and the girl quickly shushes him, pulling away from the blonde girl who settles back into her seat across from her. Nate’s stomach drops, the sight of the small bruise pointing out Charlie did much more than kiss the girl. His girl even. Yet he had to save face, he had told himself he would get over this. He just didn’t think it would be this hard.

“Stop, it’s nothing. Especially since he couldn’t bother to show up this morning” Evelyn grumbles, eyes dropping to her plate so they can’t see her utter disappointment and Nate suddenly feels guilty. He wakes up Charlie every Saturday but today he didn’t because he was jealous.

“Evelyn I’m sure it’s not you” Violet starts but the group is cut off as the chestnut haired boy clambers into the seat beside the girl, hair a disarray and black t-shirt wrinkled against his skin. The very shirt he slept in and didn’t bother to change since he was in such a rush.

“Shit, what time is it?” He asks quickly, shoving his tray onto the table and the group laughs while Evelyn beams a bright smile at the boy beside her. As Charlie glances amongst the table he spots Evelyn’s soft smile and returns one back.

“It’s nine, there’s still a half hour of breakfast” she tells him and he smiles at how gorgeous she looks. He loved weekends when he could see the girl in her regular clothes. It gave him a better image of what life would be like with her outside of this school. That is if he got to keep her.

“Hi” he tells her, a little breathless and eyes shining into her own like they always did. The very look Evelyn had been hoping for as she got ready this morning. Then much to Evelyn and everyone else’s surprise Charlie leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to her cheek before turning to his food.

“You forget to set your alarm?” Marty asks, laughing lightly at the boys disheveled appearance. Charlie sends him a glare before glancing over Evelyn’s head to look at Nate.

“Nate usually wakes me but I guess this morning he forgot” and with everyone’s eyes on him Nate not only feels guilty for giving Evelyn doubts about Charlie but guilty because he knows everyone at this very table knew he had done it on purpose.

“My bad man, I just forgot” he says and doesn’t even convince himself before turning back to his own plate of food that he had barely touched due to the fact his stomach was in knots all morning

“So, this is like officially a thing?” Laurie asked, pointing between both Charlie and Evelyn. Instead of responding Evelyn thinks about what Violet had said and looks to Charlie to see if there is any regret written on his face.

“I guess so” Charlie just tells her before flashing Evelyn a smile and continuing to eat his food. Evelyn can’t help the wide smile that crosses her face as she drops her head to look at her food. The rest of the table share knowing looks but this time no one offers Nate a remorseful smile because his own jealousy would be the thing to ruin his friendship with Evelyn, not telling her his feelings.

After finishing breakfast and being harassed for the hickey on Evelyn’s neck the group is quick to move on to the rest of their day. Retreating to study halls, clubs, sports, and group projects. Charlie promises Evelyn he’ll meet her soon for planning committee, needing a shower and change of clothes before he went about the rest of his day. That’s how he finds himself walking back to his dorm with Nate by his side.

“Look man, I know you’re upset but that was a dick move” Charlie tells him as he pushes through the dorm door and Nate drops his head.

“I know” he mutters, watching as Charlie collects his towel and a change of clothes so he can head to the showers. Nate had been too busy letting his emotions control him he nearly forgot he finally had a friend, the kind he always wanted.

“I know this whole thing isn’t ideal, I’d hate it if I were in your shoes too. You have to remember we’re friends though and you were the one who decided to let her go” Charlie tells him, tossing the towel over his shoulder. Nate groans, hating himself even more for deciding to let her go.

“I know man, I don’t know what to tell you though. It’s not like I just fell out of love with her over night okay. I need time to process and when things happen like you biting her neck I struggle” Nate tells him, sitting on his bed and running his hands through his hair. H hated that he never committed and he knew he was being a child but this was just how it was now.

“Nate, I’m not a fucking vampire. Also I obviously know that but if you love her you have to let her be happy and I like to think I make her happy. Plus she makes me really fucking happy, for the first time in months, even when I thought I never would be again. So please, be a friend” Charlie pleads and Nate is reminded of the truth that Charlie had shared with him not so long ago. A sentiment that he was just a guy trying to figure things out and his intentions weren’t to be mean.

“Okay” Nate agrees even though agreeing officially confirmed he would never leave the friend zone no matter how badly he wanted to. Charlie nods once he realizes Nate has agreed and then starts for the door.

“I’ll see you later” he tells him before going off and getting the shower he should’ve had this morning.

It’s not long until he’s finally refreshed and on his way to meet Evelyn. The excitement of seeing her alone has him nearly buzzing as he laps the hallways in search of the girl. Coming upon the study room used for planning committee he shoves through the door without a second thought. He watches as the girl looks up from her alphabetized and color coded planning binder and offers him a grin.

“Clean now, are you?” She teases and he rolls his eyes before moving to the chair beside her.

“Fresh as a daisy, want to smell?” He asks her, moving to nudge his face near her own and she giggles as his slightly damp hair brushes against her cheek.

“I trust you” she squeals, shoving him away and he grins, searching her features and taking all of her in now in the daylight.

“I can’t stop thinking about last night” he tells her and Evelyn blushes lightly, eyes glancing away under his stare and Charlie just smiles, hand reaching to tuck some hair behind her ear.

“We have to plan the fundraiser” she tells him, hands still gripping the binder that Charlie swears is her lifeline but he just chuckles and ducks in close, lips capturing her own. The hum of contentment that leaves her mouth tells him that she actually doesn’t mind one bit.

“We can plan later, I want to make up for all the time I haven’t been able to kiss you” he mutters against her lips and the words wrap around Evelyn’s heart and she wishes to tie it with a bow and keep them there forever.

“Such a sap” she mutters back before reaching to run her fingers through his damp hair. Charlie smiles against her lips, kissing her deeply due to the action. When his lips start to trail down to her neck again she’s too lost in his touch.

“For the first time I’m so glad no one ever shows up to meetings for my club” Evelyn says, a little breathless and lips swollen from him. Charlie laughs, hot breath fanning across her neck and Evelyn laughs from the ticklish feeling and pulls away.

“Hey, get back here” Charlie pouts, arms snaking around her waist and Evelyn shakes her head as he pulls her flush against him.

“No, no more hickeys. I don’t want to get caught again” she tells him and Charlie laughs, hugging her close and Evelyn hugs right back.

“Sorry, I just can’t get enough of you” he tells her and Evelyn smiles, pressing a soft kiss to his nose and admiring his chocolate eyes.

“Yeah, same” she tells him with a grin and Charlie kisses the corner of it, thankful to finally have her all to himself. Not hold back every time he wants to kiss her for being so damn adorable.

“In that case, do you want to join me on a date tonight?” He asks and Evelyn blushes, thinking of how she was never one of those girls who was able to go to the small cafe on campus and go on dates. The small restaurant a hot spot for Saturday night dates with the heart throb boys.

“I’d like that” she tells him and Charlie smiles and presses his lips to hers again.

“Good, then maybe after I’ll sneak into your room again”

Taglist: @octaviasdread @eden-punk @linmichea1 @pursuedbyamemoryy @mynameisjxlia

Comment if you want to be added to the taglist :))

26 notes · View notes

meetmyothersouls · 2 years ago

Note

Holding my breath until back to you 5 comes out, sorry not sorry 💅🤪

I hope you’re still alive 😂

Back To You

Jonah Hauer-King x first person reader

Warnings: memory loss, angst and tension, hang over

Chapter 5

“Are you okay? Are you going to be sick again?” Jonah asks, dropping his towel he was using to dry his hair. The towel around his waist is held in place as he rushes over to me. He kneels down beside the bed and I slide away from him.

“I…did we…?”

His eyebrows furrow in confusion just before his eyes widen in realization. “What? Oh no, no. No of course not.”

I look down at the oversized t-shirt I’m wearing. Then back up at Jonah.

“I had Haven clean you up and dress you for bed,” Jonah sighs. He gets back up and walks into the massive walk in closet. I hear him rummaging around and he comes back out in a plain black t-shirt and a pair of tight boxer shorts. I’m still slightly nauseous and my head is pounding from the apparent headache I’m going to be suffering from todays, but I’m not oblivious to the package he’s sporting underneath those boxers. I try my best to avoid eye contact. “Y/n?”

“Hm?”

“Did you hear anything I just said?”

“No sorry, I was thinking of…something else. What did you say?”

“I said, I didn’t even kiss you back last night even though I desperately wanted to, because you were drunk. Do you really think-”

“Oh god!” I interrupt him and he looks back up at me in shock. “I thought I dreamed that!” I get out of bed and stumble to the door. I’m trying to escape both Jonah and the embarrassment of being rejected by him, but he’s trailing behind me. I hear his footsteps tapping a few stairs behind me as I clamber down the staircase.

“Y/n, slow down. You’re going to fall!”

“Please just leave me alone, Jonah!”

“No!”

“Why!?”

“Because you’re my wife, and I will never leave you alone!”

“Did we sleep together?” I turn around suddenly as Jonah runs into me. My face is inches away from his freshly washed body and his prefect pressed t-shirt. He smells like a very expensive body wash, something that would named Amazon Rain or Mountain Mist. I don’t make eye contact with him, instead I’m staring at his chest like an idiot, because I can’t bring myself to look at someone like him in the eye.

“What?” His accent is thick when he’s confused.

“You were showering in my room. I just assumed that-”

“Actually it’s our room, Y/n. And no we didn’t. As I was trying to say before you stormed out of our room, I didn’t even kiss you. I didn’t undress your or clean you up like I wanted to. Your sister did. I used that shower because other other bathroom was occupied. Now if you’ll excuse me I need to finish packing.”

My anger subsides and I feel both stupid and depressed. Why did this have to happen to me? How, out of everyone in this fucking city, was it be that ended up losing the last 4 years of their life? Did he say he was packing? I feel even worse that I’ve now driven the one man who was supposed to love me away. I’m crying now and I can’t help the shaking in my voice.

“Are…are you leaving me?”

Jonah turns around from his walk back to the stair case and it seems the annoyance I caused from my outburst has melted away from him as well. His face has softened and his eyes study me. “Of course not,” Jonah says softly. I let him pull me into a hug because I need it. Jonah holds me against his body tightly in what I would call ‘the perfect hug’. My face is tucked in just under his collar bone and I breathe in his scent again. Jonah’s hands rub my back and I lean into his touch. I can’t help it. If someone were to walk in they’d definitely assume we were a couple, this feels like much more than a friendly embrace. I feel Jonah press his nose into my hair. I can’t tell if he’s inhaling or sighing. Maybe he’s taking in my scent like I am his. “Whether you like it or not, you’re stuck with me for at least a month.” He presses a kiss into my hair. “Hopefully much more.”

I unwrap my arms from Jonah’s waist and look up at him. He’s looking down at me. He licks his lips and my stomach flips. I want to kiss him. I have the overwhelming urge to feel his lips against mine again. I don’t even remember how they felt because I was too drunk to retain the memory. “Where are you going?” I ask in an attempt to push the thought away.

“Just a short trip.”

“Where to?” The idea of Jonah going on a trip seems strange to me, especially if he has the idea of ‘winning me back’ within a the month.

“I’d uh…I’d rather not say.”

“Why not?”

“Because, I just..I don’t-”

“Oooh are you seeing another woman? That’d make this whole thing a lot easier,” I joke.

Jonah groans and rolls his eyes before trudging back up the stairs. I trail after him. I was joking but it’s clear I struck a nerve. He’s going back into my room and he’s already inside the closet again before I’ve made it all the way up the stairs. Curse his long legs. He’s got a duffel bag on my bed and he’s throwing clothes haphazardly into the bag, not even folding them. His jaw is clenched and I have to admit he looks quite sexy irritated.

“Jonah, I was just kidding.”

“It’s not funny, y/n.”

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said it. Look, this whole thing is still…weird for me. I don’t know how to joke with your or even talk with you. I’m still learning, Jonah. You’re going to have to give me some time.”

“We don’t have that much time, y/n.”

“So then why are you going in a trip? Must be pretty fucking important if you’re leaving while you’re on borrowed time.”

Jonah throws a shirt into the bag and stares at me. He’s studying me, and again I feel like I’m missing a giant piece of myself. A piece of a puzzle that he’s got but won’t quiet fit into place. Jonah sighs and sits on the bed, his head in his hands. “I need to go on this trip, Y/n. I debated whether or not I should go and I really think it would be good for me.”

I make an effort to soften my voice. I sit next to him on the bed. “Can you tell me where it is? Where you’ll be? You know…in case I need you.”

He swallows hard when I say ‘need you’ but I pretend not to notice. His hair is still damp and he’s got the faintest five o’clock shadow. I think about how it would feel to lay him back on this bed, crawl on top of him and kiss him slowly. God damn it.

“I’m going to a cabin up north.”

“What for? Is it special?”

“Well, it’s where we spent our honeymoon. I guess I’ll just tell you. This weekend is our five year anniversary. I was going to take you there as a surprise but then…the accident happened and you know the rest.”

He won’t look at me. He’s picking at his thumbnail and all I want to do is grab his face and kiss him. He clearly loved me and our life together so much. I don’t think I’ve ever been given a gift as thoughtful as that. “Jonah,” is all I can manage to say.

He sniffles once and clears his throat. “Yeah, so I think it’d be good for me to go, you know?”

“Alone? Jonah you can’t go alone. Let me go with you. It might be good for my memory and such.”

“I didn’t think you’d want to.”

“Are you kidding? I’m not letting you go alone.”

Jonah’s POV:

I’ve been put through a ringer of emotions today, but I think we’re making progress. Y/n seemed upset at the thought of me leaving her, which at least gives me the feeling that she likes me at least a little bit. A step in the right direction of nothing else. She also looked at me just like she did when she used to pounce on me with kisses. She didn’t kiss me but the look alone had my heart racing.

I’m making dinner when Haven comes into the kitchen with Jorge. They’re laughing about something. Good.

“Where’s y/n?” Haven asks.

“She’s upstairs packing.”

“Couldn’t take one more second of your sorry ass, I assume?” Jorge sneers.

I can’t help but smile. “Actually the opposite, we’re going up north together.”

Haven looks horrified so I elaborate. “It’s the cabin we spent our honeymoon in. It’s our five year anniversary this weekend and I was going to go alone, but now y/n wants to go.”

“Do you think that’s a good idea?” Haven asks.

“What did you do to convince her to go? Did you cry like a little bitch?” Jorge adds. Haven smacks his shoulder and Jorge dramatically rubs it.

“I’m not going to tell her not to come, I’m trying to get her back, Haven, this is the perfect opportunity.”

“Well…maybe I should come too? It’ll be good for y/n to have someone she can come to if she’s feeling overstimulated or if she has a panic attack.”

Just as Haven finishes her sentence, y/n is coming down the stairs. She’s actually smiling and it’s the best thing I’ve seen in weeks.

“What are you guys talking about?”

“How much did Jonah pay you to go on a holiday with him?”

“What?” Y/n laughs. “No I want to go.”

“Well maybe I should come to?” Haven asks y/n. I’m silently praying she says no.

“Yeah! That’d be fun! Jorge should come to.”

I try not to groan out loud. Hopefully I can still make some progress with y/n.

Tags: @danielabetancourth @luna2034 @wandamaximoffbae @twinkledinkleg-blog @anonyymoouussssss @nonsensical-nonsence @paramorelvrr @thedonswife13 @miniemonie2001 1 @jonahhauer-kingg

✨ let me know if you want to be a part of my

Jonah tag list or if I forgot you please let me know!✨

#Jonah hauer king #Jonah hauer-king #jonah hauer king x reader #jonah hauer king gifs #jonah hauer king imagine #jonah hauer king x y/n #jonah hauer king fan fiction #back to you #my writing

78 notes · View notes

cupoftaae · 2 years ago

Text

Forever And A Day (KTH x READER) series ♡ we always end up like this (chapter 8)

Summary: your lifelong friend is forced to face his true feelings for you once he breaks the number one rule of becoming friends with benefits: dont fall in love. He knows he loves you, but you on the other hand need more convincing of the most important thing: the right decision.

Genre: fwb. Roommates, friends to idiots to lovers, fluff, angst, smut, the whole 9 yards tbh.

Pairing: taehyung x female!reader

rating: 18+ (minors dni!!!)

word count- 5k !!

Chapter warnings- swearing, mentions of fights, emotional abuse, manipulation, relationship drama, confused feelings, mentions of depression, kind of a sad chapter, lots of deep emotions. oh and also smut. (guys you arent ready) - also excuse any spelling errors.

enjoy :)

You didnt end up falling asleep until around 4am that night, Taehyung stayed up with you the entire time, making sure you were okay.

"its okay, lets just stay in bed" he hushed when you protested something about getting up and ready for the day.

"I want to shower" you sat up and looked over at him, dark circles under his eys, he looked....rough.

"then shower" he finally sat up as well, his face turning to you when his eyes shot wide. "oh"

Tilting your head, you looked back at him, "what?"

"you have a bruise" he gestured to his own jaw while looking at yours. your hand flew to cup your cheek, hiding it. "yeah I figured I would probably have a mark. Good thing for makeup, right?" you joke and pull the covers back, feet meeting the cold floor.

"you know we still have to talk about everything, right?"

You tensed up and turned on the ball of your heel to face him. "yeah....just give me a few, okay?"

he nodded, taking a breath as you scurried into the bathroom, door shutting loudly.

He wasn't mad at you, he was upset in the same sense you were upset at him for hitting kaito. However, when something bothers Taehyung, it bothers him deeply and fully. It was something you observed from a young age, the complete mental shutdown whenever something didn't go right for him, or there was a situation that made him upset in anyway. You cant remember the last time he has been like this.

After your shower, the aroma of bacon infiltrated your nose, leading your footsteps out to the kitchen. "what are you doing?" you asked quietly, wet hair dripping onto the tile below you.

"Im making breakfast?" he made an obvious gesture to the stove and fridge, making you roll your eyes. His attention was on the lavender camisole you changed into, as well as the fact you had used your makeup to hide last nights evidence.

"why do you have a tone with me" you leaned against the counter and crossed your arms. "I dont" he shrugged

"youre being snippy"

he laughed and turned back to the food, throwing some onto a plate with fruit and shoving it your way.

you took the plate and met his eyes with your own. "thanks. why are you moody?" you quickly pressured once again

"are you serious?" he whipped around to you

"what?"

"have you completely forgotten what has happened in the past 24 hours? or do you want me to catch you up?" he scoffed

"im fully aware" you glared at the boy

"then why are you acting like I dont have a reason to be upset?"

"you dont-" you paused, setting down the plate of food and looking at it. You allowed yourself to take a breath before looking out the window. The shitty weather captivated the shitty aura of the kitchen. "lets just eat breakfast then talk"

he looked at you before slowly turning back to his food, you returning to your room and shutting the door.

Now you were alone with your own thoughts to gather before having to face the situation. It wasnt that you were afraid to talk to taehyung. It would never be that, no. It was you were afraid to be honest with yourself.

You so desperately wanted to just bathe in what felt like love, what felt like a chance at a happy easy-going relationship. You wanted it so, so badly.

So badly- that you told everyone things were good when they werent. You knew this ship would sink soon enough, but not like this, not like that. You thought the bliss would at least last a little longer. Now you sat like an open exposed wound for everyone to examine and tell you how to fix it, when you already knew the problem wasn't fixable.

stitches couldn't hold together what you felt.

Once you both silently took your collective times apart in seperate rooms, you agreed to sit in the living room. The rain pattering onto the glass quietly as his record player was faintly heard in the other bedroom created a semi-comfy environment to be in.

"So..." Taehyung sat on the floor, in front of the tiny table, watching you cross your legs to sit on the opposite side of him, body scrunched up defensively.

You chewed your lip and looked at your hands, avoiding contact with the boy in front of you. "I'm sorry, for everything" you quickly decide on ripping the bandaid off as soon as possible, his eyes flicker to yours.

"I lied about so much and, its not fair to you. Youve been my best friend for so long and I dont like keeping secrets, theres been a strain between us for quite a bit now, and I dont know what to do"

He nodded as you spoke calmly, part of him elated and relieved that he didn't have to pry you open to the conversation.

"Kaito was an asshole, he is an asshole. I don't even know what it was that I saw in him."

"I would assume...that it wasnt the first time he had done something like this, put his hands on you, that it?" tae added in

You sighed and finally looked up to him, shrugging helplessly. There it was, your heart on the table in front of you both, you mine as well be honest because theres no going back anymore.

"theres been a few times. not to that extent but yeah"

He exhaled and ran his hand over his face, "why didnt you tell someone?"

"I couldnt" your voice was shaky now, eyes trailing to your wrist that still had marks on it from just a few weeks ago. It was embarrassing.

"what do you mean you couldnt? you just sat and fucking suffered?" his voice was a bit louder, hands now gripping his arms as they crossed over his chest.

"Its not that easy, taehyung! fuck, I, I just couldnt come out and tell everyone that I was going through that, and then be questioned why I stayed, and then further have to fucking explain that im incapable of feeling loved without someone loving me romantically." you wipe a tear, slight anger and frustration evident. "that shit is fucking humiliating" you shook your head.

He swallowed harshly and looked at you, scrambling of something to say.

"you dont get how hard it is to be in college, and having all your friends hookup and shit....I dont want that, I never wanted that. I cant, I attach myself too easily and-"

"that wasnt love, y/n"

"what?"

"you said you needed someone to love you romantically in order to feel genuinely loved? That man never loved you" he spat, knowing it sounded harsh but hoping his point came across in the directed manor. It was obvious; any person who could hurt their so called significant other with no regret is not someone worth the label of loving. You knew that.

"i was lying to myself"

"and everyone around you, too" he sighed, folding his arms out in front of himself.

"im sorry" you breathe, watching as he looked around softly.

"I wish you hadnt kept it a secret for so long, y/n, I know that you wanted everyone to see this fake image of what you wanted to be perceived as, but you know...its okay for things to not go as we plan, right?"

you shrug

"we are young, and frankly, we are stupid. Do I think I should have hit Kaito last night? no, it was wrong of me. Do I think he deserved it? yes, but thats not the point, the point is that sometimes you have to forgive yourself and accept yourself."

"what do you mean?"

"you have to learn to accept yourself for how you are, stop trying to create some fake fucking image for the rest of the world. who cares? You have so much going for you, who gives a shit if you dont have a perfect relationship? there are many people we know who are probably doing much worse" he chuckled lightly, making you nod.

"just be easier on yourself, I would never judge you. Faking shit is not worth getting hurt over." he added on, emotion and sadness now showing through his voice.

You nod once more, eyes filling up again, "okay"

He stood to his feet and walked over to sit beside you, using the opportunity to pull you into his warm embrace, sighing contently when you returned the hug.

"you have to just...let some things go." he whispered, "nothing has to be perfect" his hand gently rubbed your back. "sometimes what we want isn't what we get"

you sniffled and hid your face in his neck, pulling back to look into his eyes. "and what is it that you want?"

He smiled softly as he examined your face, so much thought in your head as your hands fidgeted. you

"you to be happy" he emphasized, squeezing your palm

"I want you to be happy too, taehyung. I should have never dragged you into this shit."

"Im happy when you are, and hey, we cant change whats happened. we need to just...move forward and hope for the best"

You quickly hugged him again, face tight against his chest as his head rested atop yours.

"Do you ever miss Gwangju?" you asked

Tae smiled and got lost in thought for a minute, "yeah...yeah I do" he whispered.

"we should have never moved here, Busan is nothing but trouble" you giggle softly, a sound that lifts weight off of taehyungs chest.

"we had good times there, huh?"

"I miss it so much, I miss everything about it."

"like what?" he asked gently, hand playing with your hair.

"Just how we would always be at eachothers houses, eating home made meals and biking through the streets. Just living normally, just being kids" you sigh, leaning into him

"we still can do all those things now, here, at the apartment" he spoke up quietly. You two are used to spending time close together, but schedules have been clashing, creating a difficult distance between you both.

"we cant" you chuckle breathily, pulling away and wiping your nose with a tissue.

"why not?" he pouted, a slight, hopeful smile on his lips.

You gave him a knowing glare, pressing your back against the couch as your hands fell into your lap. "well....isnt it obvious?"

"No, guess not" he tilted his head, genuinely confused.

"I think....over the summer..." you trailed off, eyes lost in some random object across the room as the boy next to you tried to catch on. "I think we made some mistakes"

"oh" he looked down, immediately understanding what was coming.

"and we never have spoke about it, and I think we should" you turn your body to him.

"I dont think thats necessary" he shook his head, bouncing his knee.

"you told me to be honest with you"

"I told you to be honest with yourself" he clarified, scoffing slighting.

He never wanted to fully confront the whole issue you both fell into almost a year ago, it was something that just happened. You both agreed to sleep together for a little while, it was mutual, nothing more nothing less. He had a hard enough time getting over his feelings and hopes he had for you, and he isnt ready to have this conversation. Not here, and not now.

"what if this is being honest with myself?" you spoke calmly, making his head lift up to you.

"what are you talking about?"

You looked at him and back down at your hands, "I dont know why we did all that, I dont know why we agreed to sleep together. Youve always been my best friend and I worry if I maybe ruined something-"

"no, no, you didnt." he stopped you quickly, "we both decided to do it, it was very much mutual. please dont think like that"

"but everything has been so off between us since then...." you pick at the fabric of the carpet.

"Yeah, I agree, but I dont think it has anything to do with that stuff"

"I do"

He looked at you and chewed on the inside of his cheek, feeling cornered.

"It wasnt like what we did was exactly bad, we had fun, we made rules, set boundaries, we jus- I mean, do you regret it that much?" he murmured quickly.

you stared at him for a moment, watching his chest rise with anticipation for your next words.

"I dont regret it at all...thats the problem" you quietly admit

Taehyung looks up, unsure if he heard you right. "im-im sorry?"

You shake your head, "I don't regret any of it, tae. I feel like we approached it, all of it, wrongly. I messed up a lot of things for myself, I cant seem to look at you the same anymore." you add.

Taehyungs heart was in his stomach, he pinched his thumb to make sure he wasnt having some dream. "so, you mean that..you dont regret doing what we did?"

"do you?" you counter.

"absolutely not" he exhaled.

you both looked at eachother quietly for what felt like forever.

"I feel like ive already embarrassed myself enough today but i'll just add to it I suppose" you start, taking his hand and looking at it. "when I say I miss the old us, it means I miss the time before I pretty much set myself up to fail....I guess I developed some feelings for you, which is entirely cliche, i know, but Ive been programming myself to get over it because I know that you and I wouldnt work" you admit

His eyes widen quickly, not sure what to do other than laugh, which makes you confused.

"what?" you semi-smile as he stands and catches his breath

"y/n...oh y/n" he kneels down to you, "if only you knew" he sighed

"knew what?" you panicked

"Ive felt the same way about you for the past few months and its been fucking eating me alive!!!" he openly speaks, making your eyebrows rise.

"you have no clue how hard its been to see you with Kaito, wishing it was me. you have no clue what its been like to live with you and see you look like that every day, its painful!" he laughs, feeling free in finally admitting what has been eating him alive for so long.

You find yourself breaking out into a smile, small giggles as your stomach flipped at his words. You wouldnt have pictured this happening, but here you were.

"I dont care if I look like a fool right now, you just.... you just made everything so much easier" he took a breath, smiling like crazy

"did I?" you smile widely, feeling elated that the outcome to this wasnt an embarrassing one.

"how could you ever think we wouldnt work?" he asked, holding your hands as he spoke more quietly now

you shrug, "I just didnt think you saw me that way"

"ah...." he sighed, "we should have known, we arent hookup people." he joked, making you laugh as you started at each other.

"I didnt think it was gonna be this simple...." you giggle, squeezing his hand, still shocked at how easy the coming clean was.

"we are fucking idiots" he smiles before pulling you closer

"yeah, we are" you whisper before pushing your lips to his suddenly, pulling back to see his reaction.

He blushed, pulling you back down to him and returning the kiss once more. It wasnt rushed, it was sweet, slow and meaningful.

Once you pulled back to catch your breath, you cupped his face lovingly, feeling like right now, there is nothing more you could possibly do to make yourself happier. "you know we will still have to further discuss this whole thing, yeah?" you whisper, thumb grazing his cheek.

"I know, I know." his hand falls on top of yours, "I want you to know that I care about you and Im serious about this, but I also dont want to rush things..."

"same here" you add

"but as of right now...I really wanna kiss you again." he spoke, making you laugh as the blood rushed up to your face. "do it all you want" you breathe out, returning his lips to yours as you moved yourselves up onto the couch, your legs coming around to straddle him.

He nearly choked, pulling away to wrap his hands on your waist. "maybe we should move to a more comfy spot?" he chuckled

you looked around before realizing you were about to bang it out with your friend on the living room couch. "yeah, okay, bedroom?" you stood, grabbing his hand as you both ran into the hall, escaping into your room like 2 horny teenagers in love.

It was ironic, actually. The first few times you two had sex, it felt mature, it felt like there was more to it, but it wasn't genuine. After today, things felt like they didn't need to be as put together, it was okay to just be....

The bed dipped as you crawled onto it, turning over to lay on your back as you watching Taehyung join you, his figure hanging over yours. "whats so funny?" you smile, hands climbing up his arms, wrapping around his neck as you pulled him closer.

"nothing" he chuckled, lips moving from your jaw to your neck, making you gasp quietly. "just...think its funny how we always end up back here"

Your hand was tangled in his hair, "mhm...like I said, we are idiots" you smile, closing your eyes blissfully as his tongue swipes down to your clavicle. "dont tease, I think we both have waited long enough"

"okay, okay" he winked at you jokingly before gently moving his hands to your tank top, lifting it carefully. You sat up slightly, wrapping an arm around to unclip your bra and toss it to the side.

There was no shyness with him when it came to being naked, it was the feeling of comfort, like you know he would never judge you or your body, and he never did.

"mmm" he hummed against your neck, lips kissing down to your breasts as his tongue slid across your nipple. "ah-" your head gently fell against the pillows behind you, biting your lip to try to contain any noises that attempted to escape.

"youre okay with this, yeah?" he looked up a bit to catch your expression, making sure you were alright.

"yes, im okay with it" you smiled and watched as the boy carefully returned to pressing his lips against your chest, gently sucking the skin on the side of your breast so he would leave a mark.

The arousal between your legs was hidden under your shorts, thighs rubbing together beneath him as you tried your best to just let go and not be so tense.

"can we take these off?" he looked back at you, fingers lightly holding onto the hem of your shorts.

"I personally find it unfair that Im naked and you still have all of this on" you gestured to his hoodie and sweatpants, making him laugh. Usually when you two were in this position, there was very little talking, and very little time spent on taking clothes off. Taehyung wanted it to be different right now though, he wanted to take all the time in the world, there was no rush here.

You sat up and pulled down your shorts, kicking them off from around your feet before directly moving to take off Taehyungs hoodie, placing it somewhere off the bed. His lips attached to yours, pushing you back into the bed. Something about kissing Taehyung was just different, you couldnt put a reason as to why, exactly, it just was. The comfort that was felt, the way he was messy but also passionate as his tongue danced against yours.

His long fingers delicately ran across your chest, making its way ever so lightly down your stomach, and to your thigh, causing you to shiver a bit. "Youre so beautiful" he whispered, teeth grazing your ear lobe as his words spilled into your system.

He would beat himself up if he ruined this, if he hurt you, if he made you feel like you were anything less than what you had become; treating you as if your skin was nothing more than the thinnest glass. He didnt want to just compliment you, he wanted you to feel how much he has yearned for this, for you to understand his regret in not being 'a man' and openly expressing his feelings within the first go around. For someone who knew your body almost as well as his own, he was so worried about breaking it.

His index finger hooked into the hem of your underwear, beginning to lightly pull them down your legs. The exposure felt familiar, it wasn't nerve wracking for you. The man above you was one you trusted with your body more than anyone.

"taehyung" you breathed out, slightly parting both of your thighs apart, the feeling of his breathing against your skin as he slowly kissed down to your navel, stopping right before your center.

He took one last look up at you, perhaps it was a moment of pride, or an ego boost over, but seeing how red your face had become even in the dimly lit room gave him a sense of accomplishment- and he wasn't even rightfully touching you yet.

Once his tongue pressed flatly against your core, your hand shakily flew to grab onto his hair. If you hadnt been so aroused in the bliss, you would have opened your eyes and looked down at the boy sitting between your thighs. You woke up this morning with a sore jaw, headache, and a bone to pick, now here you were getting eaten out in your bedroom with the boy who put you in this position in the first place.

"mmmh" you used your other hand to press over your lips, knowing that if you were too loud, your neighbors might have a few words to share with you. His tongue continued to poke at your clit slowly, a little too slowly. His arm came up to press down one of your thighs, keeping your entrance open for his access.

"youre soaked, holy shit" he laughed softly, moving back and wiping your wetness off of his jaw as he began to use two of his fingers to trace along your vagina. "baby, please" you whispered, hand trailing down to find his hand, locking it into your own.

You gasped at the sudden intrusion of his long fingers, pushing deep into your cunt and retracting slowly, only to repeat over and over again. You couldnt tell if you were blushing at just the simple action, or the lewd sounds filling the room, either way you were left breathless and squirming under his touch.

"this okay?" he smiled, still feeling his chest tighten at the given fact you called him 'baby'.

"yea- oh my god..." you arch your back slightly when he presses his tongue back to your neglected clit, kitty licking it just barley.

"ride my fingers, cmon baby" he egged you on, unable to help the smirk stuck on his face as he searched around for that one spot.

You had to admit, you were surprised at Taehyungs dialogue- he was never one to speak during sex in general, despite the occasional pet name. It shocked you, but at the same time only turned you on more.

Your hips rocked gently against his hand as he added a 3rd finger, making you whine loudly. "I feel so full, fu-fuck" you clenched around his digits, catching his smug face as he watched you fall apart.

The ends of his fingers curled perfectly, making you moan aloud, hand slapping over your mouth once more as you tried to shut your thighs. He seemed proud of himself for being able to find your g-spot, recognizing your behaviors and hardening his actions even more.

"Taehyung, please," you plead, rocking your hips as a faint layer of sweat builds up on the creases of your legs. "cmon baby, cum for me, its okay just let go" he spoke so gently, in such a tone that didnt match the situation playing out in front of him.

His fingers continued to prod at your sweet spot before he returned his tongue to your bundle of nerves, watching your chest rise and fall frantically. "im right here" he whispered- and that was just what you needed to come apart.

"ohhh" you clenched around him once more, arching your back as your vision went white, you could have sworn you went blind for a moment. "you okay?" he asked, pulling his fingers out and crawling back up to you, kissing your forehead. Your eyes flutter open to see him, complete admiration in your face as you take him in. "yeah...yeah im okay...that was-"

"good?" he giggled shyly, his behavior completely switching from what it once was just a mere few seconds ago.

"yeah.." you sighed, smiling. You felt like you were on cloud 9, but you still wanted more. You, somewhere deep down, feared this was a dream, and he would leave if you stopped.

Your hands ran down the front of his chest and down his stomach, biting your lip as you looked back at him, noses touching a bit as he leaned to kiss you once more.

It started as slow kisses, but the eagerness you had for eachother quickly took over. Your hands led to the hem of his sweatpants as you untied them, his mouth attacking your neck roughly, panting.

"baby-" you whimpered, trying to push him back so you could take off his pants easier. He smiled at you and leaned back, untying them himself as he moved and slid them off along with his boxers.

You watched as his erection sprung out, eyes immediately drawn to the red tip leaking with pre-cum. You had to admit, you almost moaned just looking at it.

He caught your gaze as his hand began to stroke himself a few times, moving back above you. He blushed and tried to return to hiding his face as he kissed your jaw. "dont be shy now, its too late to be hiding" you teased, hands wrapping around him and gently grazing his back, pulling him down.

"you want this?" he asked once more, eyes looking into yours.

"I do, do you?"

"of course" he nodded, kissing you once more before bringing his dick to your center, sliding his tip up and down your folds slowly, making you lift your hips up in search of more friction.

You hid your face against his shoulder as he pressed himself into you, eyes checking and making sure you were okay while doing so. Once he bottomed out, he moved both of his forearms on either side of you, face against yours as he pressed his lips all over your face, peppering you in kisses. "are you okay, angel?"

You squeezed your eyes together until he was all the way in, it obviously wasn't your first time, but it definitely had been a long enough period of time since the last time you have had sex, so the feeling was a bit abnormal. You exhaled and opened your eyes faintly, "yeah im okay" you pressed your lips to his, feeling more comfortable as he made sure you felt okay enough before moving. "you can move now" you pushed his hair out of his face and cupped his cheeks, looking into his eyes as he began to move his hips, slowly pulling out only to push back in.

The first few strokes were not that pleasurable, so you wiggled your butt to allow him to access deeper into you, shifting the placement. He groaned quietly as he pushed back in, hands now gripping your hips.

"ahh, fuck" you whispered, pushing your head back into the pillow as you began to feel more pleasure between your legs, his dick reaching spots his or your fingers never could. "feel good?" he asked, fighting back his own moan as you clenched around him so deliciously, he had to go slow or he would cum right there and then.

"so fucking good" you grazed your hand down the side of his face as you whined, your arousal speaking for you as the wet sound became more audible the faster he pumped into you. "missed this, missed you" you admit, eyes squeezing shut once more

"missed you so fucking much" he groaned, crashing his lips against yours as he lifted himself carefully. "More please" you whisper shyly, feeling a tightness in your stomach that yearned to be released.

He sat back and gently gripped your thighs, spreading them further apart s you were exposed entirely. He took in your fucked out state before beginning to thrust into you once more, this time with a quickened pace.

He mumbled your name as he threw his head back, skin slapping against yours as your moans filled the room. "yes, yes" you encouraged him, bucking your hips up to meet him in between each time he pushed further into you.

He urged you to lift your hips as he put a pillow under your lower back, something he always did to ensure he reached your g-spot.

You gasped and clutched the blanket, whimpering as he continued to thrust into you. "right there!"

The headboard of your bed was clashing against the wall, creating a loud sound. You tried to reach over to hold it but couldnt, "tae, the neighbors, fuck, its too lou- oh!" you could barley finish a sentance, his dick fucking you just right as you felt yourself becoming dumb at his actions.

"I dont care, let them hear" he spoke forcefully, hands squeezing into your thighs as he held them up. "let them know how good you feel"

You clenched upon hearing his words, for someone who never did dirty talk, he sure fucking knew what to say.

You whined and gripped your chest as he pulled out, once again gliding his tip down your folds and to your clit. "so fucking perfect for me, baby" he whispered, pushing back in and making you moan louder at his sudden action.

"tell me-" Taehyung began, setting a pace as he thrusted into you, "did her ever touch you like this? did he ever make you feel this good?" he groaned, eyes trailing down your sweaty body squirming beneath him.

Your face grew red as you shook your head frantically, "no- no he didnt" you admit, whimpering as you began to feel a build up.

"good" he leaned forward, his dick angling just right as he got close to your face, "dont ever let anyone touch you like this" he warned, his possessiveness something entirely new to you.

"mhm, n-never" you manage to spit, nails digging into his shoulders and back. "baby im so close" you cried, sneaking a hand down to between your bodies, fingers rubbing at your clit as his mouth reached down to your breast, tongue prodding at your hardened nipple.

"me too" he breathed out, lifting your thigh higher as he fucked into you more, "fuck im gonna cum, where do you want it?" he exhaled

Your hands gripped him harder, barley managing to speak, "i-inside" you whimper, feeling your orgasm suddenly wash over you the same time his did. Your mouth fell open softly as you arched into the bed. You werent sure how loud you both were, but you knew that it was probably one of the best orgasms of your life.

"so good for me, y/n, always so fucking good" he gently pulled out, watching his semen spill out of you and onto the bedsheets. You pulled him back up to lay on top of you, the room silent, filled with heavy breathing. your hands delicately played with his hair, eyes shutting as his head rested on your chest.

You both werent sure how exactly this happened, or if it even should have happened, but it was something to worry about later. All of these months, harboring feelings and keeping secrets- it didnt mean anything anymore. You felt safe, comforted here with taehyung, and as you both silently spoke and praised eachother before drifting off to sleep, you hope he did too.

a/n- WELL THEN.

taglist-

@turnthepageandbeburnt @taebangtanbabe @borahaexoxo @lelefoodlover @tan-veee

76 notes · View notes

spinningwebsandtales · 2 years ago

Text

The Shape of You Pt. 7

Michael Myers X FemReader

Rating: T+

Warnings: Panic attacks, reader is struggling with anxiety and depression, reader gets sick from not taking care of herself

Word Count: 6.1k

Pt 1 Pt 2 Pt 3 Pt 4 Pt 5 Pt 6

Taglist: @the-marshals-wife @msghostface @izumima @cavern-creature@101killer @scooby-the-soviet-soldier

(A/N:) Hello lovely readers! I am SO SO SO sorry it took me so long to get this chapter out! I struggled with this chapter. I know where I’m going with this story and we’re making headway to the end but this one I had to figure out where I wanted this chapter to go and I had to take my time to come up with the ideas. It took me a month before an idea popped in my head but I still struggled with getting it wrote. Plus life happens! I hope to get the next chapter out a lot sooner and again I’m so sorry to all my readers that have been waiting so patiently! Until next time happy reading! ~Countess

Weeks passed by after the incident at work and everything seemed to go back to normal, except for you. The world kept turning and time kept moving but you found yourself stuck in that one horrifying moment. You hid the turmoil well at work and tried to keep it from Michael, but he knew something was wrong. You were retreating more times than opening up to him. If he touched you without you seeing, your immediate reaction was to flinch away. Afterwords you hid the fact that you flinched by giving him a fake smile, shrugging it off with some excuse. You rearranged everything in your office to face towards the door, so you could see everyone who came and went. You didn’t seek out male coworkers now and sent Julie to take care of things now, instead of going yourself. You hated to do your work best friend that way but you just couldn’t bring yourself to be alone with anyone yet, especially men though they never did anything to you.

You felt silly and worthless as you jumped at shadows, worried about somebody following you, and the worst was the nightmares. You hadn’t had a good nights sleep in so long and it was beginning to show as the bags under your eyes grew darker. Michael worried about you severely as he tried his best to comfort you in whatever way you needed. It broke his heart every time you shied away or just a simple touch made you jerk and cower. He was beginning to grow livid as the days passed by, not towards you but towards the man that had brought this misery upon you. He had finally gotten you to open up to him after he screwed up only to have another problem to build a wall between you two. It had become an unspoken agreement as Michael made sure you could see it was him before he made any contact. He started to ask you before giving you hugs and he stopped kissing you suddenly. When you woke him up by thrashing around because of another nightmare, it was his presence alone that could calm you down. Michael wouldn’t go back to sleep after the really bad attacks, wanting to watch out for you and give you any comfort you needed. He also started giving you his shirt before you both laid down for bed. He knew his scent could calm you through any storms that arose and it had become an unspoken agreement. Before you hit the pillow he was stripping his shirt off and handing it to you. You always wordlessly took it from him before tugging it over your head. You always melted immediately at the warmth of the fabric and his familiar smell penetrating your senses. Knowing he was close and he still loved you made you fall into a dreamless slumber quickly. Though those bad nights still did come and you sweat and squirm before jolting awake.

You never thought a man could ruin your life and the safety you had always felt so easily, but here you are fearful and paranoid daily. You always felt eyes upon you and his harsh grasp, his cruel words bouncing around in your mind like a run away bouncy ball. The sea of your mind was in constant turmoil and it was taking everything Michael had to penetrate the violent waves. It broke his heart when he had come into your extra room to watch you work, your mind deep in thought. You had screamed shrilly when you noticed he was looking over your shoulder and the work you had been so focused on ruined. You had to start again and he felt so guilty, he was beginning to wonder if he was good enough for you at all. He didn’t want to voice these fears to you, cause he knew as soon as the words left his lips you would feel responsible for making him feel that way. When in actuality it was neither of your faults. It was one man who didn’t have the common decency to take the word no for an answer and attack what couldn’t be his. Michael still had a rage deep inside that made him want to abandon this life he had come to care for so much. Deep down the beast wanted to rampage, to bring his own version of justice to the man who had brought this upon you. But he couldn’t leave you at this moment. You needed him now more than ever and he didn’t care how long it took or how much he had to work, he was going to get you through this. You would heal in time and become the woman he had grown to adore. Not that he didn’t love you now as you were, but he couldn’t take seeing you broken.

It pained him greatly and he wanted you to come back and see how good of a life you lived with him. Michael wouldn’t be here in this moment if it hadn’t been for you, to take that risky chance. To look beyond the monster he had been painted to be and see that deep down there was a man that needed help. You were the light in his storm and you brought a difference out of him that even he didn’t believe existed. He had been poked, prodded, brainwashed in to thinking that he wasn’t worth anything. But you saw that diamond lying within the coal and you nurtured it and made it shine brighter than it ever had. Now it was Michael’s turn to step in and bring your shine back. You were tarnished with fear and no amount of pushing and forcing would bring that special shine back. He had to learn something he never had, patience and preserver through his frustrations. You needed him now, more than he needed you and there was no way he was going to abandon you. He would take one step at a time and be there until once again you were more than ready to step out again and be the person you usually are.

The weekend came again and you let yourself sleep in. Michael’s side was empty and long cold when you woke up and it made your heart sink. But the feel of his shirt against your skin brought back a little warmth. He was taking such good care of you, you couldn’t help but feel guilty that you were neglecting him and his needs. This whole thing had never been about him nursing you. You had wanted to show him that the world and people weren’t so bad, to show him that he was more than what everyone said he was and you were beginning to succeed, but now you were the one backtracking. You were the one messed up and now Michael had a good example that of course the human race basically sucked at times. Especially the one human that brought this all on. You shivered diving deeper in the blankets as you couldn’t help but feel that this whole ordeal was far from over. You had tried to be brave and show everyone that what had happened, didn’t you bother like you wanted it to. But that was far from the truth as you found yourself sinking in the depths of fear. Enough that you had nightmares, you found it hard to be at work alone in your office, and just the contact Michael longed for had you stiffening in panic.

Michael had gotten good at knowing when panic attacks were starting to set in and he made sure he was distant enough to keep you comfortable but still made sure his presence was around. You looked up at the ceiling, wanting to stay in bed all day but you knew you couldn’t neglect the day. You felt the need to be at least a little productive. You had been wanting to work on your recent project that laid abandoned in amongst your art supplies. You took a deep breath, bracing yourself for whatever the day would hold. Michael was being really quiet, most likely letting you sleep as long as you could and it warmed your heart. You began to seek him out as you wanted to see him. Guilt still nagged at your being as you felt fine being the one to initiate contact with him, but your mind wouldn’t let you be okay with him being the one to initiate anything. Despite the fear and worries you did feel anger towards Ian for ruining everything. Life had been so perfect as your home life had become everything you could have hoped it would be. Then one horrible moment in life and everything shattered. Your hands shook as you looked for Michael.

He’d been busy this morning as you noticed the laundry you did last night was folded, the TV already on but turned down low so it wouldn’t disturb you, and the smells of something cooking wafting from the kitchen. You found Michael there, standing at the stove with a spatula in hand. It was funny to you how he could stand so still without humming or moving, though it probably hadn’t been so funny to others that he had preyed upon. The thought made you shiver but that was a time long ago. Though you had seen The Shape personally most recently you still couldn’t help but feel safe in your own home. Well you used to and despite the new anxiety that had taken control you still felt like your home was your haven. It was getting harder to leave and while your boss understood that you were having to work some things out after everything that happened, you couldn’t take the time off you needed. The office was so understaffed and with no new applications coming in, you completely understood that they needed you. Though you knew you were making mistakes you normally wouldn’t and were having a hard time concentrating. It felt good to be needed though and that your job was safe as long as you kept showing up to work. You breathed deeply, trying to gear yourself up to face another day when Michael turned around. He had heard you walking down the hallway but in true fashion he remained focused on the task at hand. He also didn’t want to go searching for you as he was worried it would make you feel uncomfortable.

He had been trying to get in the habit of letting you come find him, as it made you more at ease. He missed being able to pull you in for hugs and he really missed kissing you like he used to. That was the hardest part for him as he had been denied any form of human comfort for years. It set his teeth on edge, but for you he would take it. He had to as there was no choice. His heart sunk seeing you standing in the doorway, his shirt rumpled from sleep and your hair sticking up. Normally he would find it adorable and would take his emotions out on you. But the only reason it saddened him was he could see the bags under your eyes, your skin was pale, your eyes normally bright and cheerful were lack luster, and you never stood with the confidence you used to have.

“Morning,” you mumbled giving him a wobbly smile.

Michael nodded back, he had gone back a little into his old ways so he didn’t talk as often. While you had started not to talk much at all you still talked more than he did. It was awkward trying to make conversation now as you forced yourself to talk. You didn’t want either of you to back slide but it was becoming difficult the more time passed and you made no progress. Wordlessly you sat at the table, waiting for the silence to break or maybe the sudden urge to talk would come. Michael finished up cooking, scooping scrambled eggs onto the two plates he removed from the cabinet. Still without a sound he set your plate before you, before taking a seat at the other end of the table. Your lip wobbled as you fought the urge to cry. Nothing seemed appetizing anymore and you barely cooked now. Michael had stepped up making simple things he had learned from you, but it felt like you were taking advantage of him. Since you weren’t feeding him and whatever he cooked you barely touched. You scooped up a small bite, still fighting the urge to burst into tears, before chewing slowly. It felt like chalk in your mouth and the flavors that were normally there were no where to be found. Michael didn’t try to speak, wanting you to focus more on eating. He was worrying more and more about you as more weight fell off you. Ever since he had met you, he knew you had a healthy appetite and he didn’t want that to go away. Before, food was nothing to him, until you had shared your meals with him and then he realized how much you could connect with someone over one simple dish. Now he watched you chew and swallow like he had placed gravel in front of you. It didn’t take long until you were pushing the plate away and standing up from the table.

“I’m not that hungry,” you choked fighting back tears. “I think I’ll go lay down a little longer I don’t feel so good.”

Michael just nodded and a few tears slipped free from your barricade. You fled quickly not wanting him to see you cry or break down once again.

You shut the door quickly and flung yourself into the pillows where your sobs were muffled and began to soak your tears. You were sick of feeling this way, sick of being such a bother to him, and sick of not being able to pick yourself up. Your world was crumbling and no matter how many times you tried to piece it back together it just fell back apart. You were lost, trying to find your way. But it felt like being lost in a darkened woods with no light and you couldn’t even begin to see the stars because the trees keep blocking everything. It didn’t take long until you fell back into a fitful sleep, exhaustion dragging you under but you still couldn’t rest. Your mind a constant battlefield that wouldn’t leave even during the peaceful moments of the night. You whimpered and cried as nightmares continued to plague your unconsciousness. Michael had quietly checked on you at one point in the afternoon, but you had yet to wake up and he didn’t want to bother you. His fear of making you feel worse keeping him from even trying to talk or soothe you. You sweated profusely as you tossed and turned.

You woke once more and could see that it was night time, you spent all your day trying to sleep and nothing else. Michael’s side wasn’t occupied as he never came to bed. The clock was reading midnight and he didn’t stay up late much anymore. You should feel hungry, you should feel rested but you felt none of those things. Quietly getting up you went to go find Michael to see him sleeping on the couch. It shouldn’t bother you as much as it did, because he could sleep wherever he wanted, but you couldn’t help but feel like it was your fault that he didn’t feel comfortable enough around you to sleep in the same bed like you both had been. Defeated you went back to bed to cry more as the bed now felt too big, too lonely, and too cold. You longed for the heat of Michael’s body against yours and the comforting pressure of his arms wrapped around you. But those were gone as your mind could no longer take comfort from those things. It always felt like Ian trapping you against your will, that he was trying to take advantage of you once more. So you cried and wallowed in the pit of despair you had created until once more you fell into restless slumber.

Your dreams haunted you as you felt hands grasping you tightly. The pressure leaving bruises in your skin as they held you down. You couldn’t see for the darkness beginning to swallow you as the hands pulled you down. You couldn’t escape no matter how hard you tried. You could feel your skin become clammy and everything felt hot. You tried to scream but your throat was raw and your tongue so dry. You had no energy and you could barely move your head as the black continued to swallow you. Your chest heaved, the panic becoming too much. You tried to suck in air to calm yourself and fight off your attackers holding you down but it was still all in vain.

You jolted awake thrashing violently as the terror still had a tight grip on you. Tears were soaked in the pillows and you could see a shadow above you. You tried screaming like in your dream, but your mouth was so dry and you couldn’t get enough air to scream. Hands had you pinned to the bed keeping you from lashing out and you refused to calm down at all.

“It’s me,” Michael’s voice penetrated the darkness and you immediately calmed though you were still stiff. Everything felt hot, his shirt you wore soaked with sweat, and your vision hazy.

“What’s wrong with me,” you cried out holding onto the drenched blankets beneath you.

“You’re sick,” Michael replied. “You have a fever and I can’t get it to go down.”

While Michael didn’t know much about nursing someone back to health, he couldn’t just stand on the sidelines while you suffered more. Your lack of eating, sleeping, and the tumult emotions had brought your system down enough that your immune system can’t keep up with the demand your body needs.

“What can I do,” he asked while finally letting you go. Once his hands were off, you couldn’t help but realize how weak you actually were. All this had finally caught up with you and you were suffering more.

“There’s medicine in the bathroom cabinet,” you panted. “And I need a wet rag for my forehead. Something cool and fever reducer will bring my fever down. Michael I’m so sorry I’m being such a burden.”

“Quiet you’re not a burden but we have to get you better,” he chanced it and kissed your forehead. You flinched but stayed still, letting his love and care surround you. “Go back to sleep and I’ll get everything you need.”

Closing your eyes you watched Michael’s retreating back before drifting back into the darkness. Michael raided the cabinets trying to find everything you could possibly need. He only found one packet of medicine that was a fever reducer, but there was only one left and no other boxes remained. He even checked the other cabinets just to be sure, only to come up empty. You were in no shape to leave the house so he knew it was going to be up to him to go out and get whatever you needed. Wetting a rag and making it back into the bedroom, he placed the cool cloth on your fevered skin before going to get a glass of water. He jostled you gently waking you back up, your eyes were glazed over and your breathing was still shallow and quick. You swallowed the pill he offered without question before going back to sleep. Michael watched you for a moment stroking the sweat soaked hair from your cheeks until he felt comfortable to leave you alone.

He didn’t know how going into town was going to go for him. Yeah on his nightly excursions on Halloween he had been wearing a mask, but the authorities would know exactly what he looked like. It made him anxious, but it made him feel worse when he thought of you laying in bed with no medicine in the house to help you through this sickness you were facing. Michael resolved himself, he couldn’t just let you go through this on your own. You had brought him from his darkness and it was time for him to return the favor. Even if things never went back to they were beforehand, he would still love you no matter what. Grabbing a baseball cap and some sunglasses Michael dressed similar to how you would, when you left the house to run errands in Haddonfield. Dressed in jeans and a simple shirt he hid his features as best he could with the hat tipped low and sunglasses to hide his eyes. He was nervous as he didn’t want to be caught and leave you alone with no one to look after you. He also had to contend with your nosy neighbors who had the tendency to pry in your life. Several times while he lived with you he had to hide during the visits and them coming by to question you why you weren’t leaving your home as often. You just gave them vague answers, trying to keep yourself from lying right out, but most of the time you just had to anyway as they continued to pry.

Michael sucked in a deep breath, opening the door and checking the surroundings. He hadn’t been out since he came here, that was the one thing you didn’t want him to do at all, in fear of watching them take him away. And he heeded those rules as he didn’t want to drag you down with him as his accomplice. With no person in sight he quickly made his way to the car before anyone could get a good look. He started up your car and backed out of the driveway. He had learned to drive from watching the doctors as they transported him back and forth and it didn’t take much for him to get good at driving. Traffic wasn’t bad for a early Sunday morning, he hoped that the city wasn’t stirring just yet. He wanted to make it back home quickly before the streets were packed with shoppers or families looking to enjoy some family time in town. The drug store came into view and Michael parked the car, getting out, and locking the door. He pulled the cap down more as he was getting more nervous the longer he was outside. He wished for the cover of nightfall but with the drugstore being family owned, they didn’t stay open all the time. He was fortunate that they were open on a Sunday anyway. The lady behind the counter greeted him, before doing a double take at his massive build and shadowy features. She suddenly got nervous as he stepped to the counter, his shadow overtaking her and most of the small counter.

“M-may I help you,” the older woman stuttered. She didn’t know what it was about her customer but the fear was shaking her to the core.

“My girlfriend is sick,” Michael answered in a low voice. “I don’t know what medicines will help her the most. Can you help me?”

“O-of course,” she answered before leaving the safety of her counter.

Michael listened intently as she lead him to the cold medicine aisle. He became overwhelmed at all the options and different medicines for all sorts of ailments. He explained carefully all your symptoms to the woman as she began to grab everything you could possibly need. Soon Michael had his arms full of fever reducers, cold compresses, and melatonin to help you sleep. As she rang him up, the lady was still giving advice that could help in any possible way. Michael fought back the chuckle that the woman who had been terrified of him when he walked in, was suddenly very comfortable. She wouldn’t be feeling the same way about him if she knew he was The Shape of Haddonfield. The Michael Myers was standing right before her in her own store and she had no idea. Michael felt odd as he experienced another different source of normalcy as he was trying to do anything he could for you. With hat still tucked low and sunglasses on his face he thanked her quickly and left. Going back to the car he tossed the bag into the passenger seat and headed to his next stop.

While he really wanted to go back home, instead of pushing his luck, the lady had suggested different soups and fluids for you to drink. Michael didn’t go completely into detail on why you had gotten sick, he did explain the bare minimum on your lack of nutrition here lately. So instead of home, his next stop would have to be the local grocery store. This was where Michael’s nervousness exploded as it was much more busy than the little drug store he had just visited. Cars filled the parking lot and people of all shapes and sizes walked to and from the building. While his nightly terrors had been done with a mask on, there was people who knew his face. Specifically the local law enforcement and a few other people. Tugging his cap down lower, Michael left the safety of the car. Like they could sense his foul deeds, the populace of Haddonfield that were grocery shopping steered clear of the large man who made his way to the grocery store entrance. The sight of all the aisles overwhelmed Michael for a moment, along with the large amount of people swarming the checkout counters and different sections. If he couldn’t face his unease for you, he had no right to help or ask you to face yours for him.

Sucking in a deep breath, he grabbed a hand held basket and started his search for the few things he needed. So far he had only ran into one person and they quickly apologized before racing away to safety. Michael was more careful as the made his way through every aisle until he finally found one thing he had been searching for. Before he could escape to go find the other items a couple older ladies stopped him to see if he would reach something on the top shelf for them. After hesitating and unsure if he should speak, Michael merely nodded and grabbed what they asked for. After thanking him and cooing over the ‘nice and tall young gentleman’ Michael quickly retreated. You were worth it and he would do this all over again, but if he didn’t get out of here soon and get back to your side he was going to lose it. He had come much too far to let himself be caught trying to buy soup and juice in a grocery store. Michael couldn’t help but chuckle quietly at the thought of the headline in the newspaper. ‘The Shape Caught Grocery Shopping.’ The thought of your tears at him being taken away made Michael sober quickly and he finished the last errand quickly.

His knuckles were white as he gripped the steering wheel hard. He needed to check on you and get the supplies inside, so he could buckle down and get you back on your feet. You needed to eat, you definitely needed to sleep, and you really needed these medicines rustling around in the paper bag. Home was not too far away and Michael could tell more people were stirring in the neighborhood. It was going to make getting inside more difficult than when he left that morning. He hoped you were still asleep, blissfully unaware that he had left and gone out into town. He could just imagine your reaction when he finally told you. Which you would probably figure out pretty quickly as you kept up with whatever was in the cabinets in both the kitchen and bathroom. The only reason you had ran out of medicine is it wasn’t that time of year that you normally got sick. Michael didn’t mind going and getting whatever you needed, he enjoyed getting out to an extent but he didn’t want to worry you and make you feel even worse. Pulling in he didn’t see your closest neighbors around yet.

He knew they had to be awake but he wanted to make it inside before someone could walk out and see him going into the house. Grabbing everything quickly for one trip, Michael pulled the keys from the ignition and walked quickly to the door. He didn’t want to run as it would only bring attention, he was never much of a runner anyway. He opened the door dropping the bags on the floor and closing the door quickly upon any curious eyes that would become suspicious. He even stood there for a minute watching out the top glass on the door, to make sure nobody left their homes to investigate the strange man that just entered your home. He knew that several people at work knew you were dating, but you kept the bigger details from them. Only giving them bits and pieces to satisfy their curiosities.

“Michael,” your hoarse voice called. “Michael.”

He ran up the stairs to see that you were still asleep though you were calling out to him in your feverish dream. Sweat still coated your forehead, as your temperature was staying the same. Michael recalled everything the woman at the drugstore said so before he woke you, he began to get everything around. But before he left he placed a cooling compress on your forehead to replace the now hot washrag he had placed before leaving.

Filling a glass full of ice and water and another one with cold juice, Michael grabbed several pill boxes off the table and brought them back into your room. With the compress now pulling some of the heat away, you were sleeping more restfully, it made Michael hate to wake you up. Lack of sleep hadn’t helped with your body as it was one of the main reasons you wound up in this situation. You needed more medicine though to help you kick this illness and get better faster. Michael gently gripped your shoulder, shaking you and calling out to you.

You felt yourself drowning in darkness, the feeling of somebody dragging you down further and further away from the light. You felt severe aches and chills as the hands gripped you tighter. Then you were burning as you struggled to breathe. You tried screaming out, to call for Michael but silence only came out. You began to panic, until a hand grasped your wrist in the dark depths, pulling you quickly towards you light you were struggling so hard to get to. Suddenly you burst forth out of the suffocating black.

You woke up with a gasp and the first thing you could see, when your eyes finally focused was Michael. His gaze was full of concern which only made his grip tighten further. Everything you could remember started rushing back to you and your dream suddenly made since. You shivered violently, the fever leaving you cold that no amount of blankets could take away.

“Michael,” relief flooded you when he cupped your cheek. His hand felt scorching but also so good at the same time. You nuzzled deeper into his touch and it made him smile. He nodded before holding up the different pill boxes and the cup of water he had gotten for you. You took the medicine but you couldn’t remember having these types of medicines in your cabinet.

“Where did you get the medicine,” you finally asked after taking a big drink of juice. Now that you thought about it you didn’t have any juice either. You searched his face, only for him to look away. Chills took over your body and it wasn’t because of the fever.

“Michael?!” You coughed and he offered you more water. You took the drink but you weren’t letting this go. Those few seconds gave him time to gather up the courage to finally tell you.

“I went out to the store,” he finally replied. Michael didn’t think it was possible for you to pale further, but you did. The thought of him out on his own, especially on a weekend day when everyone and anyone could be out and about on the town. You understood that he did it all for you and it made you feel a little guilty that you had gotten sick. It had made him leave the safety of your home, all because you weren’t taking care of yourself. Michael could tell that you were starting on the downhill slope of blaming yourself for him leaving. Though it was his choice and he was sitting before you perfectly safe and sound.

“Stop blaming yourself,” he cupped your cheeks forcing you to look up at him into the eyes. “It’s not your fault. None of it. Not me having to go out and getting the things you need, you getting sick, or what happened at work. You didn’t ask for it and you didn’t bring anything down on yourself. You have to stop blaming yourself (Y/N) and start healing.”

You melted while still shaking with tears streaming down your cheeks, “I feel like it’s all my fault.”

“It’s not,” Michael said vehemently. “Stop letting the guilt tear you down, it’s time to let yourself heal.”

“Do I deserve to heal,” you sobbed.

Michael chuckled, taking you into his arms and holding you tightly. He wished greatly that he could take this burden from you and make the man who brought this upon you pay dearly, “You deserve it more than anyone else. You said that I was worth having a life and healing. If I’m worth that, then you’re a thousand times worth being happy again.”

As soon as he said those words, you felt relief overtake your body and all the exhaustion made you feel faint.

“Thank you Michael,” you mumbled. He kissed your forehead, laying you back down in the bed and covering you back up.

“Don’t thank me,” he said kissing you again, this time on the cheek. “Just focus on getting better.”

“I will,” you yawned, the medicine taking affect. Michael stayed by your side until you had drifted back off into a deep restful sleep.

You had thought that the feeling of being watched all the time, even at home was just you being paranoid. You had never been a suspicious person but a lot had things had changed in your life. What you didn’t know was that your feelings were right. Ian had it all before you ripped everything from him. He couldn’t let you get away with it, especially when he was going to make your life everything you could ever want. So he followed you, everywhere. He waited for you to leave work, the grocery store he kept his distance but remained close to see what you were getting, and then he followed you home.

There he spent most of his time as he took note of everything. Ian noticed that you didn’t have much of a social life as he saw that as soon as you got home you rarely left. You also kept all the curtains closed and he rarely got to see even a shadow inside. He didn’t give up, staying there haunting you and stalking you. Then his perseverance paid off as the weekend came along and Sunday he saw someone leaving your home that wasn’t you. A large man went to your car a hat pulled down low and sunglasses. Ian sucked in a breath as he noticed a scar peeking out from under the sunglasses. Michael Myers had once again disappeared without a trace months ago and the cops couldn’t find him anywhere. Your life had suddenly changed and you had become more secretive and drawn from him and your fellow employees. Now he could see, that you had found someone and brought him into your home. And that one man was Michael Myers. The Shape of Haddonfield and Ian knew he wasn’t going to let this chance slip him by as he was going to make you pay. He would take from you exactly what you took from him. He would make you wish that you never had denied him that fateful day.

#Michael Myers X Reader #Michael Myers / Reader #Michael Myers #Halloween #Michael Myers Fanfic #Halloween Fanfic #Female Reader Insert #Not My Gif #My Writing

24 notes · View notes

makeste · 4 years ago

Note

I like Bakuguo but his attitude is starting to really piss me off. He's talking about Daku as if he's just ~crazy~ and as if he isn't partly to blame for Deku's toxic self-worth issues. It's infuriating to watch. If Bakuguo doesn’t admit out loud and in front of his friends that his bullying of Deku played a part in Deku's current destructive state and if he doesn’t verbally apologize and reaffirm Deku's worth then I can no longer like Bakuguo's character or Hori's writing.

tbh I don't really know why this is the discourse of choice for people all of a sudden, but this is already the second ask I've gotten about it, so I might as well address it lol.

I think fandom is conflating fanon!Deku and canon!Deku here again. fanon Deku is of course much more sensitive and woobified and has much shakier self-esteem. fanon Deku is the one that turns evil in so many AUs because of Kacchan's bullying. fanon Deku is the one that actually jumps off the roof in so many fics, as opposed to fishing his notebook back out of the pond a few minutes later grumbling about how Kacchan needs to think before he speaks or else he could land himself in serious shit one day if god forbid anyone actually does take his cruel words to heart.

and just to clarify before I get any further, I am not saying this to excuse Kacchan's actions in any way, because what he did was still completely terrible and unacceptable and WAY over the line, and what's more he knew it, too. the bullying was still shitty and horrible and awful, and definitely impacted Deku and made him miserable. I fully acknowledge that, and that Kacchan has a lot of atoning to do for it. this is not a "Kacchan did nothing wrong" post.

but that being said, I don't think canon Deku's reckless self-sacrificing nature actually has anything to do with the bullying. I think they're two completely separate things. canon Deku actually has pretty decent self-esteem in spite of everything Kacchan did to him. canon Deku doesn't think he is useless. canon Deku had a wholeass fight with Kacchan less than 10 chapters into the series in which he explicitly spelled it out for Kacchan that he had a lot of worth, and was going to prove it to him. canon Deku was persistent in wanting to become a hero and hoping and believing that he could find some way in spite of being quirkless. canon Deku never let go of that dream even when no one else supported it. I don't think he would have even given up on it after being told no by All Might, tbh -- we just never got to see how it would have played out because of everything that happened with the sludge monster shortly afterward. but he's not the type to ever give up on something that easily, and we've seen that. canon Deku never thought he was useless, but rather wanted to prove to everyone else that he wasn't.

the drive that Deku has to save and protect others even at the expense of his own safety is something entirely separate from that. he doesn't break his body for others simply because he has no self-esteem and thinks that his own life isn't important. he does it because he can't stand the thought of someone else getting hurt, and knowing that he could have done something to prevent it. it's as simple as that. like, Spider-Man has the whole "with great power comes great responsibility" thing, right? and he doesn't have low self-esteem; he simply believes that if he has the ability to help someone else, then he has a responsibility to help them. it's a personal creed. and Deku is based on Spider-Man. his philosophy is based on that philosophy, which was one of Horikoshi's core influences and is one of the core creeds in superhero fiction.

Deku is self-destructive not because he doesn't value himself, but because he is literally physically incapable of standing back and doing nothing if he knows that he can do something. he's the type of person who sees a car speeding towards someone and leaps in to push them out of the way. NOT because he wants to get himself fucking pancaked by a speeding car, but simply because he can't sit back and watch the other person get hurt without taking action. his body moves before he can think. and that's where the whole "doesn't take himself into account" thing comes in -- the fact that his thought process simply stops at "get them out of the way of the car", and never extends beyond that to "hey, and maybe I should try to find a way to do this that doesn't involve me getting hit in their place." to him, that's simply less important than the first priority, which is getting the other person out of the way.

and regarding that last part, while that may seem like a self-worth issue if he's prioritizing everyone else above himself, I think what it actually is just selflessness taken to extremes. like for instance, when a parent sacrifices themselves to save their child, them placing the child's life above their own isn't necessarily because they don't see themselves as having value. rather, it's that they love the child so much that they place their well-being even above their own. and that's what Deku is like as well. except that in his case he cares about EVERYONE, and so is willing to sacrifice himself for anyone. and that selflessness is his defining character trait, and simultaneously the most admirable and the most terrifying thing about him. it's both his greatest strength and his greatest weakness, which I think is fascinating to explore.

but anyway, so that's also why we never really see anyone thoroughly chewing him out for this behavior either. because the thing is, it is admirable how selfless he is. it's just that there's also a reason why most people are at least a little bit selfish. and that's because too much selflessness will ultimately and inevitably wind up getting you killed. at some point you either have to learn when to put the oxygen mask on yourself first, or else find yourself a loyal group of friends (or classmates) to watch your back, and make sure that mask gets on you when you need it. and maybe help you land the plane too while they're at it.

anyway so that was a lot of rambling, but basically it all boils down to three things:

when Deku berates himself for being useless (for instance at the end of the War arc), he's doing it out of frustration for not being able to push the others out of the way of the metaphorical car. that's the kind of uselessness he can't stand. the sitting-back-and-doing-nothing uselessness.

Kacchan's bullying was terrible, and it might have indeed played a part in Deku's choice of the word "useless" as a way of berating himself in these instances, but he is not the one who gave Deku this mindset of taking himself out of the equation. that's something that was already inherent to Deku from day one. (but that said, Kacchan has a lot of things to apologize to Deku for anyway, so if he wants to add this to the list I certainly won't stop him. he gets mad about Deku's suicidal attitude because it worries him, but that doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't feel responsible for it. people underestimated his feelings of atonement before 284/285, and I think they're still underestimating him now.)

and lastly, one last important note, which is that Deku's current "saving" mindset isn't wrong, just as Kacchan's "winning" mindset was not wrong either. the lesson to be learned here is NOT that being selfless and wanting to save other people is bad. rather, it's the fact that he's trying to do it alone that's got him all fucked up right now. basically when you think about it, selflessness is really just selfishness on someone else's behalf. which means that in order for Deku to be saved, it isn't necessary for him to change his outlook or his selfless attitude, even if it is pretty crazy lol. rather, all he really needs is a good group of friends who are willing to act selfishly on his behalf in return. protecting each other through mutual selflessness lol. teamwork as self-preservation. hence why the U.A. kids are here now.

anyway so yeah, I think that's everything. sorry this got so long and out of control lol. this is just a very specific nuanced thing that's hard for me to express, but which I feel is very important when it comes to Deku's character. Kacchan didn't unleash Depressed Nomad Deku on the world (or at least not in this respect). but that being said, he and the others will hopefully be the ones to nudge him back on the right course again.

#bnha 319 #midoriya izuku #bakugou katsuki #bnha meta #deku meta #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #asks #anon asks #long post

428 notes · View notes

what-yadoking-likes · 2 years ago

Note

Henlo how are you?

Are there any games besides Payday that you're really into? I've been pretty hyper fixated on Terraria recently. Idk I just really want an excuse to talk about Terraria with someone but like no one here plays it as far as I know and I have this pent up excited Terraria energy I just wanna unleash on someone but I don't want to confuse or burden anyone so I'm just in the corner alone with my Terraria hyper fixation. Sorry if that's too much I just wanted to ask you something but couldn't think of anything cool.

Actually I did have a good question (maybe idk). Are you proud of how you're doing with The Cell? Like are you satisfied with the direction it's going and how the plot is unfolding or do you just feel like it's not right or it could be better? Also completely unrelated but Jacket just coming in and cock blocking Wolf and Hoxton is fucking hilarious

Uh idk how to end this so I'm just gonna put an emoji here 🫠

Hi-iiiiiii

I have personally never played Terraria. My partner has played in the past & occasionally goes back to it, gets obsessed for a few days & then the cycle repeats itself all over again.

Games other than Payday I am obsessed with HMMM. Well... I often find myself going back to Left 4 Dead 2 (which isn't surprising considering it was inspo for Payday : The Heist). There's something weirdly comforting about it?

Recently I've been playing Pokemon Scarlet alongside my partner who plays Violet. We did our best to ignore news of new 'mons & spoilers & so far I have enjoyed the game! Pokemon came out when we were in primary school, so it's nostalgic for us to play, but we've also been playing the games together since we got together some 13 years ago, so it's kinda like a couples activity we do now, I guess.

I have a lot of time & love for Final Fantasy, too. FFIX & FFX are amongst some of my favourite games of all-time, but because of their nature (huge-ass games with sidequests that send the in-game clock into the hundreds of hours), they're not something I dip into all the time - but I do re-play them often, & even have tattoos referencing both games.

NOW ONTO THE CELL OH HO HO.

This is how I had imagined the Cell going all along, pretty much. I didn't always know how they would get to the exact position Wolf and Hoxton are in right now, but I knew that I wanted it to be an examination of Hoxton post-breakout, because when I first started playing Payday 2 (immediately after blasting through Payday: the Heist & loving it), I was disappointed that the development/story seemed to be told more through blocks of text accessible in menus & live-action films rather than in the game itself. Don't get me wrong, I love the live-action stuff and the opportunity to have written information on hand, but I felt a bit... disappointed... with how the breakout was this huge cinematic thing, and then the revenge happened, and then... Hoxton is back to his old self again? I didn't buy it. There would be more to it than that. Speaking as someone with anxiety, depression & PTSD... there's always more to it than that.

My original intention was to have the main focus be on Hoxton and his PTSD/anxiety/trauma from being left behind and replaced. As I started writing I quickly realised I was actually more comfortable writing from Wolf's POV. This inevitably meant I ended up focusing on his traumas too, but I'm not displeased with how it turned out that way.

I guess... when I first started writing it, I didn't think I would still be writing it so many months later. I knew it would be multi-chapter but I had no idea it would become as big as it has in terms of the word count.

Originally I wanted a way to take one of my favourite fanfic guilty pleasures tropes - 'but there was only one bed!' - and find a way to make it believable. We all love a good power-cut/thunderstorm situation - I've written them myself - but I wanted to challenge myself to write it in a more... plausible way?

I guesssss I also didn't intend on having Dallas be a prick... but he turned out that way.

If the focus is more on the 'am I proud' of the Cell, well... I have lost confidence in myself a bit recently. In the beginning I got a lot of comments which were really lovely & went into detail about what people liked or found funny, & now there are less of those & part of me wonders whether the readers are happy with the direction its going. That's... been a tough thought to deal with ngl, because I did really think I was telling a good story and telling it well, & now there's a lot more uncertainty & insecurity about it for me. But I need to hold steady and get the whole thing done so I can move on to something else because... it's been a long time.

Also lol Jacket. I originally wanted him to catch them in the previous chapter (before the rimjob scene), but figured it would be a bit awkward to have them get caught, then immediately getting back into it like 'OH WELL LOL', so I switched the order a bit instead.

#Yado replies #Yado answers #Yado drinks #Yado is slightly hungover #Thanks for the Ask!#This was a long-ass reply #The Cell #video games

2 notes · View notes

mackeydoodledoo · 4 years ago

Text

I Only Swim Free: Chapter 5

Pairing: Bela Dimitrescu x (Fem!)Reader

Summary: You’ve done swimming all your life. You’ve gotten to your dream college on a scholarship for your outstanding freestyle technique back in high school. Relationships never crossed your mind however, that was before you met your swim team captain: Bela Dimitrescu.

Warning: Broken Heart, Depression, But it gets fluffier when you read more into this chapter, ends in SMUT

A/N: This chapter about to get SPICY

“Busted and Blue” - Gorillaz

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Word got out [rather quickly] that Bela’s now ex-boyfriend had been cheating on her. Since Bela went to look for you during the fraternity house party.. It was also because of how he was seeing you and her always so in close proximity to each other. Although he feels guilty for what he’s done, he’s been trying to reach back out to Bela to tell her how sorry he is and that he’ll be a better guy for her.

Lousy excuse really..

“To be honest I’ve heard lousier excuses from my own past exes,” You sigh, looking down at your textbook, writing down some notes for a class you missed because Bela didn’t want to be left alone, even if it was in your own apartment

“I was right about him,” Daniela called it

“What do you want a cookie?” Cassandra jokingly asks

“Yes,” Daniela says, giving her sister the ‘puppy dog eyes’

“Go nuts,” You say, pulling out a cookie you bought from the student center

Daniela happily takes the cookie and immediately bites into it.

“You have to unwrap the plastic first dumbass,” Cassandra sighs, deciding to go up into her room

You took Bela back to her house however, she immediately locks herself in her room. Her mother or her sisters check on her, despite her wanting your company the most. You had been trying to focus on your school work but at the same time trying to be there for Bela as much as you could was already a clashing combo to work with. Luckily, your teammates and her two sisters had been there for her too when you weren’t able to.

“Hey thanks Dani for offering to look after her tonight, I owe you one,” You sigh

“No worries, I knew her boyfriend was nothing but trouble,” She sighs, “But-but you- she’s taken a real liking to you though.”

Well, we did kiss in her car after that one fraternity house party she dragged me to, she continuously stays at my place. Not that I’m complaining though..

“Really?” You ask, slightly blushing, “Well, I wouldn’t want that on our minds right now. Thanks again!”

You heard that Dean Dimitrescu had been close to going at his throat for hurting her daughter. However, she also knew it would look bad on her part; taking her personal anger out on a student was not the best idea.

“I’m angered just as you are Dean,” You sigh, scribbling into your notebook, breaking the lead in the mechanical pencil

Scribbling into your notebook was one way you were able to take out your frustrations.

“We trusted him,” She growls, pacing in her kitchen, “But, I do highly appreciate you being there for my daughter, is there anything I can do to repay you my dear?”

“Nope,” You sigh, “I don’t want to be given one of those special treatments, even if I am helping one of your daughters.”

I would want you to accept me as Bela’s new Lover. Please and Thank you Dean...

“Well, you’re welcome here,” She slightly smiles, “And please, when it’s after classes, you may refer to me as Ma’am, My Lady or Alcina. Alcina is my first name.”

Very fitting for an elegant lady such as yourself Ma’am.

“Yes Ma’am,” You say, “I’m going to get dinner, Do you and your daughters want anything?”

“I’m sure my girls will text you, I will make due with what we have in this fridge my dear. Thank you for the offer,” Alcina smiles

She tips her hat as you make her leave. You casually salute three fingers to her as you were about to do the same hat tip, just minus the hat. You send out a text in the Dimi-Daughters groupchat Daniela had made for the four of you. Almost immediately Bela and Daniela text you with whatever food they wanted, Cassandra being the last one.

As soon as you and Bela show up to practice the next day, you were excused from classes as Donna had given the email out to all professors regarding State Finals, Donna has you all gathered at the poolside.

“I have the results of the semi finals roster,” She announces, “And... We are going to the State Final championship!”

You and your team cheer and congratulate each other.

“Okay okay girls calm down,” Donna calms her children, “This doesn’t mean we won’t win, so tonight we will prepare for it, this Saturday.”

In an instant all of the girls began giving their all into swim practice. You on the other hand, were just going through the motions. Not sure how to handle the sudden pressure.

“Didn’t I tell you that we all pull through this together or we lose?” Donna asks, coming up to you

“Yes coach,” You say, sighing

“You’re going to do fine, an excellent rookie like yourself should be proud you get to do this your first year,” She smiles

“True,” You sigh, beginning to shake off your nerves

“Now get your ass into the water y/l/n!” Donna yells encouragingly

After coach’s announcement you finally took a shower after skipping them to beeline it to your apartment for Bela. You turn around once you hear the shower curtain open behind you. you wipe your eyes and see Bela stepping into the shower with you.

“Hey you,” You smile, giving her a hug

“Hey yourself,” She smiles, putting her arms on your shoulders, “Quite the show at practice today..”

“Says you, even after what happened you still managed to get your shit together and nail practice,” You smile

You snake your hands on her hips as the both of you begin washing each other from the chlorine gathered from today’s practice. Even after giving each other a shower, the both of you just settled in each others’ embrace as the hot shower began wasting away.

“You remember when we first met in the locker room?” Bela asks, slipping on the hoodie you gave her

“How could I forget?” You smile, slipping on some shorts

“You were looking at my ass through the mirror weren’t you?” Bela asks, smirking

You almost drop your brush as your chees go red and begin heating up. You slightly look up from the mirror and see her slowly walking towards you. Like a predator stalking its prey.

“Did you... Enjoy it?�� Bela flirts, turning you around and pushing you against the sink

“Well-I-uhmmm-ummm,” You stutter, trying to find the words

“You did didn’t you?” She smirks, putting her hands on your stomach

You felt yourself tense up when her palms touched your bare skin. You could feel them slowly running up your stomach and begin feeling the tips of her fingers go under your sports bra.

“Bela! Y/n! Hurry it up I’m going to lock the swimming area soon!” Calls Donna from the entrance to the locker room

The both of you snicker as Bela drags her fingers away from your bare skin; you almost growl when her hands moved away from your skin. Bela practically moved into your place when she got the news. Thankfully her exes fraternity brothers kicked removed him from the fraternity house and helped her with her things when she decided to live with you.

You and Bela had finally settled a day where you’d take her out to her favorite restaurant, as a make-up for not being able to see her very often.

“Yeah, midterms are such a pain,” You sigh into your phone, “But, I’ll make sure you get tomorrow night with me okay?”

Bela decided to stay with her family for the next couple days as she’s been cooped up in your place for so long, not that she was complaining, she missed being around her family.

“Thanks for the ride y/n,” Bela sighs in relief, “I miss you.”

“I miss you too,” You blush, “Hey, we’ll see each other at practice later okay?”

“Yeah,” She sighs, “I gotta go, mother is calling for me. I love you.”

“Love you too,” You smile through the phone

Wait... She added I into the “love you”....

You didn’t say it back, no matter, you’d tell her how you’d feel about her tomorrow night. Even though you haven’t been able to see her, the both of you were able to be on the phone with each other every night before the both of you would go to bed before your classes in the morning. State finals were upon the swim team before finals. So you’ve also been working your butt off for the missed time you’ve had to sit out because of your calf injury from the first meet.

“Hey you,” Bela smiles as she picks up the phone

“Hey,” you smile, “How you been?”

“Doing a lot better,” Bela smiles, “If you hadn’t hooked me up for that one therapy session, I would have still been sulking.”

“I wouldn’t want that happening to you,” You sigh, “Hey, it’d be better off if you stay at home for tonight. Have an exam tomorrow morning and I have. To. Study!”

“Okay,” Bela sighs, slightly pouting

“Hey,” You say, gently, “We still have dinner tomorrow night. No pouting until before then. Okay?”

She sighs, but shakes it off, “Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

The next evening, You and Bela settled that you would be driving. Once you reach the Dimitrescu estate, you decide to get out of your car and walk up to the front door and knock on it. Cassandra is the one to greet you.

“Bela’s finishing up y/n,” She says, “Nice getup by the way.”

“Thanks Cass,” You sigh, adjusting your shirt

You wait around awkwardly but you see Dean Dimitrescu sipping on wine in the kitchen.

“Will you do me one big favor y/n?” She calls from the kitchen

“Of course My lady,” You say, turning to her

“Prove to me on why you’re worthy of my daughter,” She says calmly

“Yes ma’am,” You smile

“Mother I’ll be fine,” Bela calls from the stairs

You look up and your eyes widen. Bela is wearing a wine red lace dress; the lace drapes behind her legs. You were a sucker for lace. You were a sucker for Bela Dimitrescu. Seeing Bela Dimitrescu IN lace is a whole show.

“Wow...” you say breathlessly as she takes your hand in hers

“Don’t have too much fun now lovebirds,” Daniela teases the both of you

“Shut your mouth Dani,” Bela sighs as she drags you out the door

“Your family is something Bels,” You smile

You open the passenger seat for Bela and she smiles at you as she gets in. Just as you shut her door, you were going to open yours when you see Bela reaching over to open the door for you as best as she could.

“Why thank you my lady,” You smile, getting into your driver’s seat

As you pull into the restaurant that Bela had made reservations for, you’re again in awe.

“Are you sure you’re fine with paying?” You ask

“You’ve done enough for me. Both taking care of me when I was heartbroken, setting me up for therapy, teaching me freestyle.. The lost goes on,” Bela smiles, “It’s my turn to treat you.”

You couldn’t argue with that. Bela takes your arm as the both of you walk into the restaurant and basically see class. Something you don’t have however, you managed to find your ‘go-to’ nice outfit and a suit jacket at a nearby thrift store.

“Did I tell you how fine you look?” Bela whispers right into your ear

You felt a shiver crawl down your spine as she asks you.

“No,” You finally say, “Did I tell you though that you look absolutely beautiful?”

Bela blushes as she leads you to a two-person table away from the rest of the patrons.

“Mother made arrangements for us so no need to worry about money,” Bela smirks as she sips water from a fancy glass, “I can easily tell you’ve never been in a fancy restaurant before.”

“Parents could never afford it,” You say, “So, it was the cheap diners. But hey, nothing wrong with diner food every now and then.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” Bela adds

After the restaurant date, the both of you reach your apartment by midnight and you allow Bela to enter your apartment first. However, just as you closed the door, she turns to you.

“What is it?” You ask her

She says nothing as she walks up to you and cups your face in her hands. She doesn’t crash her lips onto yours, giving you the chance to pull away if you so chose to. However, your lips gently mold right onto Bela’s. She lets out a high-pitched gasp as you bring her body closer to your, both of your forms fitting perfectly against each other like puzzle pieces. Your hands trail upward to find the zipper to her dress and slowly remove it, teasing her. She helps you slip her out of the dress. She turns her body towards you, revealing a black lace lingerie set.

“Oh? So you’re wearing these for me? Was this all apart of your little plan Bela Dimitrescu?” You ask, slowly walking towards her

“Whatever do you mean,” She bites back

“You know what I mean,” You coil your arm around her waist, “Any pretty kitty like yourself should be punished for tempting me.”

In one quick motion you pick her up into your arms and place her onto your bed as you settle your hips between her thighs. You dip your head down and begin kissing her along the crook of her neck. You smirk in her neck when you hear her let out a small whimper as the tip of your tongue ran gently along her neckline.

“Hmmm sweet music,” You whisper

You lift her up for her to straddle her in your lap. You give her another kiss on the lips before laying gentle kisses along her breasts. Bela guides one of your hands to cup one of her breasts and you oblige. However, your thumb rolls over her nipple, making it hard. You hear Bela let out a strangled moan. Strangled; your mouth was latched onto her throat.

“More,” Bela breathes out

You reach around her back and with a flick of your fingers, her bra unlatches. She lets it fall off her arms and she discards it somewhere onto the floor.

“What-what do you think?” She asks, blushing

She tries to hide her flushes cheeks and turns her head away from you. You gently run your fingers along her cheek to have her look at you.

“I think, you are so fucking beautiful my love,” You say

Bela sees the moonlight reflection coming off your eyes and she drops her head down for her lips to meet yours. The kiss was at first soft and gentle however, once you gained yourself, you began losing your self control and turned the kiss to be more intense. Bela lets out a muffled gasp as she felt the pillow at the back of her head. You pull yourself away for a moment to strip off your shirt. Bela knew you were fit because of swimming. She never thought she’d be getting up close and personal with you.

“You’re beautiful,” You whisper against her ear

You kiss and lick your way down until you stopped above her bare chest. You look up at her with pleading eyes.

‘let me’ your eyes pleaded

She runs her fingers through your hair and pushes your face into her breast. You leech onto her nipple and gently make circles around it. She arches her back, forcing your tongue to gently lick the tip of her nipple.

“Y/n!” She gasps

While you run the flat surface of your tongue along the surface of her nipple. Your hand snakes up to her other breast and you squeeze it. Then, gently squeeze her nipple.

“Ah!” She screams

Your mouth switches onto the other breast to give the same gentle treatment.

“Y/n...” She says breathlessly

Your fingers trace her curves as you continue your exploration of her body down to her dripping hot center.

“Are you already wet for me?” You ask, once you arrive to her panties

She nods, “You already made me excited...”

You lowly chuckle as your fingers hook around the thin lining of her panties, lifting them. She lifts her hips to help you fully remove them from her body. You, again discard them somewhere onto the floor. Your hands gently run along her thighs to hoist them over your shoulders.

“Hmm, so you were,” You smile

Bela felt you gently breathing against her wet, dripping center, making her squirm a little bit.

“If you’re just going to keep teasing me ju-”

You drag your tongue along her pulsating lips and you insert your tongue into her, making her let out many small whimpers. Her fingers run along into your hair and you feel her pulling against you. She bucks her hips to feel more of your tongue. Your arm reaches around her hip and you press your palm down, keeping her from moving her hips along with your tongue.

“Babyyyyy I need more,” She whines

You pull your tongue out from inside her and give a small kiss on her clit before crawling up to meet her face. You give her a long, lingering kiss for her to taste herself on you.

“You’ll get more kitten you need to be patient,” You chuckle, “But, damn you taste so good.”

“Give it to me now,” She growls

You hook her leg over your shoulder, so that your arm is under her thigh.

“What-what are you- AH!” Bela chokes

She felt your finger insert itself into her.

“How does that feel baby?” You ask, looking down at her

“It feels so good,” Bela moans

“Good girl,” You coo

You slide your finger in and out of her slowly, hearing her let out little breathless whimpers was music to your ears. You stop for one moment to add another finger when you slid them back in. Bela again arches her back to feel more of your fingers. Your pace began going faster and faster.

“Y/n... I’m-I’m gonna-”

Before you let Bela climax, you force your fingers out of her and hook both of her legs around your hips. You jerk your hips forward to feel her wetness against yours. You let out a growl whilst she lets out a small whimper. You lean down towards her face as you continue grinding on her.

“Oh god baby,” You growl, picking up your grinding pace

Bela swings her arm around your shoulder and the other around your hips and begins clawing at your back.

“I’m so close y/n,” She whispers in your ear, “Faster.”

You let out frustrated grunts as you stop for a moment.

“Why-why did you s-stop?” She asks, panting

“I want to look at you,” You smile

However, you don’t really give Bela time to process anything before you jerk your hips again, making her lean her head back into the pillow.

“Together-together y/n,” Bela requests, “I want to cum with you..”

You smirks as you could feel yourself reaching your climax as well. You cup her face into your hands as you begin letting out pants and slight whimpers.

“Bela...” You whisper her name into her ear, breathlessly

You could feel her nails sink deeper into your back. You didn’t really feel any pain towards her nails. You only felt her clit against yours.

“Bela... Bela... Bela!” You growl as you come undone

Bela holds onto you for dear life as the both of you slowly come down from your high. Everything was blurry in your vision however, Bela was clear as day. You smile as you lean down to kiss her. Once morning hit, you rub your eyes however, Bela’s arm drags your arm back down across her bare waist.

“Morning baby,” You smile, kissing the back of her head

She stretches her arms as she turns her body so that she’s facing you, “Morning.”

She gives you a good morning kiss and lays in your embrace.

“Hmmm,” Bela hums

“What?” You ask

“Are you sure you haven’t had sex with a woman?” She asks, smiling

“I’m sure love,” You say, “Why?”

“Those fingers... That tongue of yours.. Worked.. Wonders.. On me,” She says, seductively

Your cheeks flush a faint red as she laughs with a low tone. You let go of her and pull the covers over your head in an attempt to prevent her from seeing you blushing however, she follows you under the covers.

“Oh? Is my girlfriend blushing now?” She smirks

“Enough already,” You groan, pulling the sheets to separate the both of you

Bela yanks on the covers and lets out an enticing giggle as she gets up to straddle you. You sit up to snake your arms around her bare midsection.

“Iubita mea,” Bela says

“Hmmm is that.. Romanian?” You ask, blushing while smiling at the same time

“Maybe,” She teases as she drops her head down to kiss you again

It was an early Saturday morning and you weren’t up for it. But, Bela agreed to drive the both of you there.

“You excited?” Bela asks

“As excited as I’ll ever be,” You sigh, “I just hope there’s no last minute events...”

“Coach gave us the whole events roster,” Bela explains, “Rest assured those are the events that are in there, we’ll be doing.”

You smile in relief, “Good, because I think I would permanently damage my calf if I ever did another 1500 meter freestyle event...”

“You’ll be fine,” Bela reassures you

The Arena was a little ways out of hometown but nothing surprising for State Finals. Your team gets there about the same time you do, and follow whomever your guide was for the day. She shows you to the locker rooms, where all of you get changed into your uniform swimsuits and make any last second preparations for the final meet of the season.

“Dimitresu University Women’s swim and dive, you ready?” Your guide comes back into the locker room

Chapter 6

#bela dimitrescu #bela dimitrescu x reader #bela is my wife #cassandra dimitrescu #daniela dimitrescu #alcina dimitrescu #resident evil village #female reader

126 notes · View notes

sunaswife · 5 years ago

Text

Summary: It’s been five years since you’ve seen your ex, Rin. He’s still not over you and you’re not over him. When he finds out you have children he thought he didn’t have a chance. Then he finds out they’re his? All of a sudden you’re teaching Suna how to be a single dad.

🔪: THIS CHAPTER WILL CONTAIN AN ATTEMPTED SUICIDE SCENE PLEASE BE ADVISED IF YOU CHOOSE TO NOT READ THEN SKIP THE ITALICS AND START READING AGAIN WITH THE REGULAR FONT

Warnings: Fluff, angst I guess, drama, and cuteness twin overload

Previously Up Next Masterlist

Chapter Ten

“Don’t worry I will save the princess and the queen!” Rini yelled with a paper towel sword. “Rawr!!!” Rin sat on his knees and flared his arms. “Oh no save us!” Akira yelled and you both stayed huddled on the couch. “I’m going to eat the princess and the queen.” Rin growled and attack Rini. Rini fell on his back and Rin began tickling his son.

Rini immediately began laughing and thrashing around under his dad and you were trying to tell them to be careful so Rini wouldn’t pee on himself. “See mom, boys are useless.” Akira muttered and stood up on the couch. Before you can scold her she hopped on Rin’s back and began pulling his hair. “Bad dragon don’t tickle the knight!” She huffed and began smack. “Oww, what the fuck—“ Rin hissed and gripped Akiras shoulders. He flipped her and made her land on her back (gently) and began tickling her as well.

Akira’s laugh filled the living room and Rini was trying to catch his breath. “Mom save us!” Akira yelled. “Jesus Christ.” You sighed and did exactly what Akira did. You wrapped your arms around his neck and your chest rubbed his back. He froze and Akira caught her breath. She lifted her legs and with her feet pushed him back and Rin lost his balance. You fell back and Rin landed right on top of you. “Ow..” you mumbled and rubbed your head. “I’m sorry.” Rin groaned and turned, his face rested right between your breasts. He slowly lifted himself and he looked at your chest. He looked up at your face and saw the embarrassment. “Holy shit I’m sorry!” He said and immediately pulled away.

“It’s okay. Sorry for landing on your back.” You muttered and he held out his hand, you grabbed it and he pulled you up. “Mommy and daddy sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” Your kids sang and you scowled. “Come on, time for bed.” You immediately said and they began to whine. “No cuz then daddy’s gonna leave.” Akira whined. “No arguing. It’s late and momma and I need to have a talk.” He said and carried them both.

He walked them to their room and began tucking them in. They kept protesting that they didn’t want him to leave but he said that he had to and it was final. He was going to come back and see them anyways.

A crying fest began and it took almost an hour for them to calm down and eventually they knocked out due to exhaustion. Finally you and Rin sighed and closed the door to their room. “I can’t believe you did that for five years already.” Rin said and rubbed his shoulder. “I need to see a chiropractor.” You muttered, “me too.” He replied. You made your way to the kitchen and took out a wine cooler, “want one?” You asked, he nodded and you tossed it and he caught it.

“I’m gonna need like four of these.” You said and Rin snorted. “You bet.” He sighed and you both got comfortable on the couch. “Where do i start?” Rin hummed. “Post breakup...?” You suggested and he nodded. “Once upon a time—“ he started and you nudged him with your foot. “I’m your ex not your kid.” You said and he chuckled.

“Alright. So it started when—“

“Sweetie please talk to us..” Rintarou’s mother knocked on her sons door. “I’m fine.” Rin spat out. “Just leave me alone.” He said as he held the pig plush in his arms. “Rintarou I’m worried. Please.” His mother begged. “What do you want me to say?!” He raised his voice causing his mother’s eyes to widened.

He’s never ever raised his voice at her. “The girl that I love left me. How am I supposed to feel?! I don’t have anyone anymore!” He cried. “Sweetie she’s your first love, of course it’ll hurt but—“ “She’s my only love! Don’t you get it! I don’t want to be with anyone but her. She was my rock, she was there when nobody else was. She supported me and inspired me to be better and now she’s gone.” He sobbed and squeeze the pig plush.

He saw the photo of you and him smiling by his bed and his chest tightened. “You fucking idiot!” He yelled at himself. He threw the plush and grabbed his wallet from his desk. He opened the door and his mom was standing there looking at her son in shock.

“Rintarou—you’re out. Are you hungr—“ “I’ll be back in a few days.” He told her. “Wait what? Why—Rintarou I know you’re heartbroken but you’ll find someone who will truly love you and appreciate—“ “Don’t you get it you old hag?! She loved me and appreciated me! But I ruined it! I ruined everything!” He neared his mom causing her to take a step back.

His eyes widened and he saw the fear in his own mother’s eyes. “Mom I—“

Slap

“I’m sick and tired of you being stupid! She’s gone. She doesn’t want you. Just move on. It won’t be easy but you’ll get over her eventually.” She told her son and he wiped his face with his sleeve. “I’m going to Miyagi and I’m going to find her.” He had decided, “With what money Rintarou? That’s a day long trip.” His mother asked.

He looked at her and she shook her head, “I’m not giving you money to see your little ex girlfriend just for you to come back even more depressed.” She told him and he rolled his eyes and slammed his bedroom door.

His mother sighed.

That night she got into a fight with her husband. “Rintarou is severely depressed and he’s having mood swings over some girl!” She hissed and his dad sighed. “My love, he’ll get over her eventually. He just needs his space—“ Rintarou’s parents were both interrupted by banging on their front door. They looked at eachother confused and his dad went to answer.

When he opened the door he was met with the gray haired twin. “Osamu hi..what brings you here—“ “Where is Rin?” He immediately asked and pushed through them. “What do you mean, he’s in his room.” Rin’s father said. “Excuse me.” Osamu quickly panted as he ran up the stairs. It was incredible disrespectful to barge in unannounced and without taking off your shoes but he wanted to make sure that his best friend was okay.

He found Rin’s door and tried the door knob. “Leave me alone!” Rin’s voice cracked as he tried to open the new pain meds his mother bought. “Rin listen to me, open the door. Please.” Osamu begged. “Osamu whats the meaning of this?” Rin’s father automatically asked. “Rin open the door.” Osamu repeated. Everyone else was muted from his mind his watery eyes and shaking hand made it hard for him to open the pill bottle.

He didn’t answer and Osamu’s heart stopped. He took a few steps back, then rammed his shoulder in the door. Rin flinched and turned to see his door slightly cracked. Osamu winced at the pain and he stepped back once more instead of his shoulder he lifted his leg to kick and he tried breaking it once more.

“Fuck Fuck Fuck.” Suna muttered as he kept his struggle. Finally the pill bottle cap unscrewed and his eyes widened. He held the pills in his palm and he put his head back to swallow. Even if he chokes trying to swallow the dry pills it doesn’t matter. He grabbed his water bottle, the one you put stickers all over and he drank as much as his throat could take.

It hurt swallowing down those pills, his throat burned and it felt like he was being cut from the inside. From the corner of his eye the door bursted open and came in Osamu with Suna’s poor weeping mother being held by her husband, his father. “Are you a fucking idiot?!” The gray haired twin screamed and immediately pulled Suna to his side. “Call 119 NOW!” Osamu yelled. “Leave me alone Samu—“ “Like hell I will! What would Y/N think if she find out you did this?!” He yelled. Tears filled his eyes and he could barley see his best friend. Rin stayed quiet and his gaze shifted passed Osamu’s shoulder.

“Y/N...what are you doing here?” Suna whispered and Osamu saw Suna’s eyes next to him. “What do you mean I’m stupid? I just feel so lonely... I said I was sorry. But you didn’t want to listen.” Suna began to cry once more and Osamu hugged him. “It’s gonna be okay. Please stay with me Rin.”

“Oh my god.” You cried, “I’m so sorry.” You apologized. “Hey hey it’s okay. I’m fine now.” Suna smiled softly and held you in his arms. “You could have been dead because of me.” You smacked his chest. Even in tears You looked so beautiful.

“In all honesty it was my fault to begin with. I shouldn’t have played with your heart. And when you left, it broke my heart. And I desperately wanted to get it back. I guess it showed how much I loved you.”

“How much I still love you.” He said softly.

“Rin you’re insane.” You wiped your eyes. “And what happened after?” You asked. “Well I had a dream about you and you seemed disappointed in the actions and state I was in. So I decided to try to be better than I was before. So that eventually you can take me back. I don’t know if you noticed but I’m a bit more social.” He joked and your heart swelled.

“In all honesty you were my motivation out of my depression. Sometimes I still get episodes and it sucks but I’ve been fine for a while now.” He admitted. “So you literally did a 180 just for..me?” You hiccuped. “Yeah. I love you. Always have and always will.” He looked into your eyes hopefully.

“Do you want to move in?” You asked and his eyes widened. “You want me to move in?” He asked. “Well how else are we gonna raise two kids? Our schedules are always changing. It makes sense to just live together.” You said and he nodded.

“Does that mean we can like share a room and cuddle like last night?”

“No.”

🔪: I know this was a lot but I wanted it to end a little positively

🏷: @therealwalmartjesus @differentballooncollection @aaesuki @atsunflower @dope-squish @prettysetterboiss @june-phantom @tomo-uwu @austriasmariazelle @xrnia @katsulia @aprettyfruit @shut-your-eyes-kiss-me-goodbye @tvbiio @sun-daddy-yoriichi @kamenoyaki @ppangiiroo @loeyprivvv @kmskj92 @lovinnoya @sarahvvictoria @tris-does-stuff @mokkeguts @sunaluvr6969 @bara-rose-would @sempiternal-amour @volleybloop @leykyuu @bokutoichigo @stfucanunot @iloveanime691 @tpwkatsumu @ohrintarou @shoutosimp @mqrinqcele @bokutosdivineass @anngelllla @toworuu @hidden-otaku-stuff @seijohiselite @caxsthetic @aquariarose @hhwanggu @bakuhoetoedoroki @yoozuku @osamus-onigiri @akaashi-todorki @donica95 @kakaokenma @airheadpillar

#haikyuu suna #suna rintarou fluff #suna rintarō #suna x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #miya atsumu #miya osamu #Akira and Rini #your everything #Inarizaki

269 notes · View notes

captainsimagines · 4 years ago

Text

To Topple A Giant || Finale

Summary: You had made it your mission to destroy even the smallest evils. When the opportunity arises to finally take down your own family after years of gaining their trust, you reach for it. And so does Steve, the man who represents a symbol of everything you hate.

Pairing(s): Steve Rogers x Reader || Avengers x Reader

Part 10 of 10 ~ Mini-Series

Warnings in this Chapter: strong language; slight reference to past sexual abuse; fluff

Word Count: 6,700+

Author’s Note: Guys... the finale! I’m crying actual tears lmao. Thank you for reading my words. It means the world.

The New Compound, July 2025, 7:09pm

The extra hour of sunlight this time of year was the easiest excuse to use for lounging on the roof to watch the sun set slowly. The compound no longer touches the clouds, but it still provides a rich view of the landscape across. There is no blowing of horns or shouts of the road hecklers; it’s a simple hour of solace to rest your chin against your arms, eat your snacks, and watch the sky change colors until nothing remains but the possibility of counting the stars.

“Hey… can I sit here?”

Your heart does a little jump at the sound of his voice. Traitor, you want to say to the pesky organ, but remain quiet as Steve wanders over to stand by you. He’s close enough that you can feel the warmth radiating from his body.

“Do what you will, Captain.” It’s simple enough of a response, you figure. You look down at the granola bar in your hand, turning it over a few times before rolling your eyes at the silly gesture. “Granola bar?”

He nods, watching as you snap it in half, and grabs the piece. “Thanks.”

You eat in cooperative silence. You take small bites, saving the granola bar so you have something to focus on during the length of time Steve decides to stay up here. He seems to be doing the same. “So what brings you out here? Another depressive episode?”

“I happen to have the perfect amount of depressive episodes, thank you very much.”

You snort, “Ditto.”

He takes a small bite and rolls the granola over his tongue. “No, I uh… I actually came out here to watch the sunset.”

“That’s sweet.” You shrug and admit your reason to him without a second thought. “I came out here to be sad, so.”

“Thor’s visit isn’t doing you any good?”

Thor is genuinely looking better. He’s started braiding his hair again, exercising with the help of Quill and Bruce, and participating in conversation without being addressed first. Seeing him makes you happy, but there’s still a glint in his eyes that reminds you of the lowest point of his life. And his lowest point was also yours. Sometimes you just want to forget. “He looks better. Healthier, got some light back in his eyes. It’s just whenever we look at each other we think of the same thing, I guess.”

Steve hums low and his shoulder brushes yours. “Loki.”

“It’s good to reminisce and all but I’ve got my limits,” you say.

“What was the special connection between you and Loki anyway?”

You grin at such an innocent question. Steve had never been close to Loki, didn’t really like him much, but he tolerated the God wandering about. You figure he genuinely wants to know. “I met him a little bit before I was assaulted. Everyone in the compound had their suspicions but no one asked. It was like they were avoiding me but also trying to help, I don’t really know. It was a weird time. And Loki, after we caught that dragon thing and really, really properly met, just straight up asked me why I was so distant all of a sudden.” Your chest warms at the memory. “I told him. And you know what the first thing he said to me was?”

Steve shakes his head a little and his eyes follow the tilt of your mouth. “‘What a cunt’.”

He startles himself into a laugh, the rough word not expected. You continue, “It was the first time I laughed in four months.”

Steve follows your gaze out to the sunset. He suddenly feels guilty, out of the loop, sad. You had only mentioned your assault to him once when you discovered Tony’s afterlife gifts, and he never brought it up again. “I’m sorry I didn’t notice you were-”

“Bucky had just moved into the tower and all of your attention was on him. I don’t blame you for not seeing me.”

It’s true, but Steve doesn’t forgive himself. He’s had two years to check up on you and because of his own selfish choice, he’s let you slip from his fingers. A question bubbles from the back of his mind — one that he doesn’t think twice about finally asking. If he does, he won’t ask. “Do you miss… me?”

“That’s a stupid question.”

“Sam put the idea in my head and—”

You sigh, “Steve, it’s the fact that he had to put the idea in your head. I can lie and say I’ve been all fine and dandy, or I can tell the truth and say I’ve been all fine and dandy. Take your pick.”

Steve stares at you for a long moment, mouth parting around invisible words. You’re staring at the sunset, avoiding his gaze but aware of his eyes on you, and he misses you. He truly, terribly, misses you. He decides he’s got nothing more to lose — he’s already lost you. “Well, I miss you. Do with that what you will.”

The two of you sit in silence for a few minutes: wind in your ears, legs shifting when too much weight has been applied, tiny sniffs of the nose. You don’t really know what to do with that information. Steve misses you. And you miss him. But he doesn’t deserve to know that. There’s been no apology from him, just things he’ll do to appease Sam.

At the three minute mark, you groan quietly and turn to him. “Are you seriously still going to watch the sunset up here?”

Steve smirks and watches you from his peripheral. He really has missed being on the receiving end of your various tones of voices. “I have been told that I’m impossible to get rid of, so yeah.”

His company isn’t all that bad.

Present Day, 2025, 9:07am

Perhaps there were good things that came from being locked up for over two weeks, alone. Last time you were locked up with the team and there was absolutely no special treatment after that. Now you’re resisting the urge to burst out laughing as Steve piles on the seventh massive pancake on your plate; or rolling your eyes as Sam keeps asking if you want more maple syrup — ‘What flavor? We’ve got six!’ — and Peter’s drowning Bucky with questions about who he encountered at the wedding.

“Is it the same as Netflix Narcos?”

“No,” you say bluntly.

“Is the Amazon series legit? Like, did Omar really kill the DEA agent?”

“No.”

“Is Omar as evil as they say?”

“No.”

“Damn,” Peter groans, piling a forkful of pancakes into his mouth. “Nothing’s as exciting as it seems, huh?”

Everyone looks to him, then to each other.

Steve clears his throat, “I was literally shot.”

Mouth full, you follow. “And I was abused for years.”

“And I had to deal with them while with HYDRA,” Bucky says with his mouth full too.

“Man, they shot at me. That counts,” Sam adds.

“And I finally got to use the shield. While being shot at,” Scott says.

You interject, “Technically I was being shot at.”

Even with such a cloud of violence, with gruesome memories — memories that would just be shoveled into the pile of things that no one is ever going to talk about again — you all begin laughing. Poor Peter missed out on a lot, but he can put two and two together. He knows this is his only chance to ask before you all lock it away and call it just another mission. It doesn’t hurt to humor him.

And even though you won’t mention it to any one else unless they ask — this wasn’t just another mission for you or Steve. Things have changed and the both of you know it. The aches within your chest are no longer negative or a bother, but instead are blooming flowers that have laid dormant for years. You’ve been plucking petals for as long as the two of you can remember, and it’s about damn time you both end up on the same page.

Everything has been quiet. Sure, there are bounties on everyone’s head but when is there not? You’ve pissed off more cartel leaders and gang leaders and political enemies than you can count on two hands, so this enemy territory is not all that foreign. You recognize the high trees, the gray skies, the mud beneath your boots. But you’ve got friends on your team that know how to climb those trees; friends on your team that know how to move the clouds and make the sky the talk; friends on your team that would hump through mud and snow watching your six.

You can’t believe you even thought about leaving after the mission in the first place. This is where you belong, where all of you belong, because you’re the only ones with good hearts who qualify for the job.

As breakfast winds down, Steve takes the opportunity to sprinkle in moments of long-awaited public displays of affection. When you go to refill your orange juice, he sneaks a kiss on your cheek. When you go to wash your plate, he makes sure Peter is looking the other way before patting your ass. And when you’re the one to envelope his slim waist from behind, he melts in your combined warmth.

“So, about our date,” Steve inquires, cheeks turning pink but voice unwavering. He looks brand new, refreshed, and there’s a shine in his eyes that you haven’t seen since forever. You can’t remember the last time you have, but you figure it must have been back when the world hadn’t yet swallowed him whole. Now, he’s burning bright with the youth his soul has missed.

You jump up and down, “Ooo, exciting!”

Steve takes you by the waist, swinging you in every direction. It’s uncoordinated, messy, and not exactly dancing but it’s pure. “Chinese? Pizza? Just fries?”

“¿Por qué no los tres?” Pursing your lips, you wait for his answer.

“That can be arranged.”

You gasp dramatically, “You’re spoiling me.”

“Well I have two years to make up for it.”

That startles a laugh from deep inside your chest. “That’s gonna be our inside joke now, huh? Two of the worst years of our lives and we’re joking about it.”

He blushes along with you. “I think that describes our relationship perfectly.”

“Our relationship…” Your voice comes out like a melodic whisper and Steve feels it in his bones.

He grins down at you but before he can respond, someone enters the common room rather cautiously.

“Oh, now what the hell are you doing here?” Steve demands, pushing you to stand behind him. The gesture is nice, but completely unnecessary. Friday would have alerted the team if someone entered the grounds armed.

Agent Kavert raises his hands, “Relax. I’m not here to arrest you or anything.”

Steve tries to move his shoulders in a way where Agent Kavert can’t see your head. But you maneuver around him, somehow ending up peeking your head through Steve’s underarm. “If I know the law, and I think I do, you can’t really arrest someone in their own house anyway, right?” You pat Steve repeatedly on his side. “Right?”

Before Steve can respond, Agent Kavert speaks. With Steve guarding you, it seems the only thing Agent Kavert wants to do is get in and get out as fast as he can. “I just came to apologize. Ballistics came back and the evidence does show that you didn’t kill Ernesto Vega. It was Ramirez’s issued gun.”

Yeah, you think. The gun Seda stole.

“Oh, what a breath of relief! I almost forgot I was there.”

He sighs and his lips pull into a small smile. “You’re not gonna tell me where Ramirez is, huh?”

Steve takes this as his cue to leave you two alone, but not before squeezing your hand on his way out. He nods over to Peter, who’s still crouching in the kitchen, unseen by Kavert. Peter gives him an enthusiastic thumbs up, happy to spy for his Captain. But you know he’s really asking Peter to take care of you while he’s gone.

You let out a heavy sigh. Omar has been wanted for years for another murder he didn’t even commit. And now, he’s wanted for another. He may be a giant with morals, but even he can’t escape the gruesome reality that plagues the wicked.

“I don’t even know where he is. If you came looking for answers—”

“No, I just… Everything’s been so fucked up since half the universe came back. And the possibility of an Avenger being bad, having played us for years — I think it just scared a lot of people.” Agent Kavert actually looks sincere. He adjusts his footing and chuckles a little under his breath. There’s a fine line creasing his forehead, but it isn’t formed from stress. He’s smiling, an honest look, and his eyebrows pull inward. “And Shakespeare? Really?”

Rolling your eyes, you shrug and lean back against the counter. “When half the world disappears and takes your family and friends with it, there’s really not much else to do.”

And besides, Loki was really into Shakespeare.

You continue, deciding at the last second to throw Agent Kavert a bone about your past. “Shield didn’t know but Nick Fury did. So did Pierce. And when Shield fell, Fury just hid it even more.” You give him a half smile. “We weren’t helping the cartel. We were slowly taking it apart.”

Agent Kavert nods, thinking it over. “The deal Jackeline made with us was pretty simple. She’d tell us all the inside secrets that she knew and in exchange, no charges against her and none so serious for you.”

Your shoulders slump and you shoot him a blank stare. “Was it really that simple? Like, I could have just used her as my one free call?”

“Joke all you want. You should have called us when Shield fell. The double agent thing was risky and everyone needs help taking down a giant like that.”

“I did have help. Involving more people was never planned.”

“He was just as much our mission as he was yours.”

Agent Kavert, as sorry as he looks, still doesn’t seem to get it. But that’s fine, you think. Not everyone can. And you’re not in the mood to argue anymore. “No… he wasn’t.”

He seems to read your mind because he simply accepts your answer. “I really am sorry for accusing you. And for the government arresting you alone and letting the white man go free.”

A tiny snort tickles your nostrils. Agent Kavert is white, and it’s even more amusing considering he’s being serious. “Thanks… I guess.”

He turns to leave, seemingly normal, until he spins on his heel and claps his hands. “Oh! And by the way — don’t leave the country. The charges of conspiracy and murder have all been dropped. But there’s evidence of drug smuggling. So, you’re on house arrest.”

Your eyes widen and you reply with a sarcastic yell. “Thanks!” He turns to leave again. “You’re fucking with me, right?”

He glances over his shoulder, “Could not have let you just get away with it. Some of that smuggling was under no order from Shield at all.”

“You know I can easily disable that ugly ass ankle bracelet you’re about to give me?”

He chuckles low, and finally waves goodbye. “Goodbye, Agent Y/LN.”

You stand dumbfounded, slightly annoyed, but you figure it’s better than actual jail time. Peter rises from his hiding spot and walks over to you, blowing air from his mouth. “Friend of yours?”

You whip around to point a finger, scream and laugh mixing into one. “No friend!”

Peter finally hears that accent Steve can’t stop talking about.

It’s a tiny portrait, sealed in a tiny frame and hidden in a tiny room. The frame is black with professional wooden carvings that make the sides look like perfectly detailed tree trunks. It’s in between the portrait of Tony and Natasha’s bracelet. Tony wears the same AC/DC shirt Steve has somehow stolen and claimed as his own. He’s got this sarcastic grin, some type of wrench in one hand while his other rests on his hip. He stands in his lab, glasses pushed up onto his head and black soot smudged on his cheek. You think Peter snapped the photo back in 2017.

But the middle portrait is your favorite. It’s the only photo he ever allowed to be taken of him. Brushing your index finger against the glass, you trace the small outlines of Loki’s jawline, to his thin pink lips, to the bulb of his nose, to the waves of his hair. He sits caught off guard, book in his hand and in regular human clothing. He shoots a rather annoyed but joyful look over his shoulder as the camera was shoved in his face. You know for sure Wanda took that photo.

“You’re not dead,” you say as you study the blue of his frozen eyes. A God doesn’t die, you remember him saying. Loki was wrong about a lot of things, but you pray he wasn’t wrong about this. There’s a small part of you that wants to speak the same words to Tony and Natasha, but there’s only so many times the world’s axis can shift for a miracle. You tap the glass, sighing a breath of acceptance, and finally let go. “Whenever you’re ready.”

Smiling up at the ceiling, you think you’re right about this one.

It’s quiet. The only sounds are the mild ripping of wrapping paper and small ‘thank you’s’ from the team. Everyone got each other something — granted, everyone got something small for everyone. No matter how much Tony joked about still splurging on Christmas shopping, his promises weren’t exactly kept. He’s gotten everyone things they actually need or wanted. Steve, a new drawing pad; Natasha, a bright pink knit sweater; Rhodey, a new watch; Bruce, a pair of sunglasses; Nebula, a dark blue knitted sweater that she immediately presses against her cheek, eyes focused on the ground as she savors the soft brush; you, the full collection of Shakespeare's plays and sonnets. And he finally presents the baby’s crib to Pepper, constructed three weeks after she originally asked him to.

“I know how much you like to reenact A Midsummer Night’s Dream in your room,” Tony grins at you. Biting your bottom lip, you throw yourself at him and hug him tight. He returns the hug with just as much strength, if not more.

As the night goes on and midnight rings, your small group exchanges tight-lipped merry Christmas’s and happy holidays. Natasha retires to her room, a distant look in her eyes as she says goodnight. No one knows where Clint is.

Steve nudges your elbow with his once the room empties. He holds out a box with festive wrapping — snowmen with carrots for noses and a variety of pebbled smiles. “From me and Okoye.”

“You got me a gift?”

Steve’s brow furrows as he nods like it’s obvious. “Of course. You’re my friend.”

“Well, now I feel inadequate,” you laugh. It comes out wet and it’s then that you realize you’re tearing up. “I promise to reenact Midsummer for you, okay?”

Steve chuckles, “You got it.”

You unwrap it slowly, half wondering why Steve and Okoye teamed up to get you a present. You. Your stomach churns an innocent whirl.

It’s a long sleeved vest… or sweater. You can’t really tell until you pull it from the box. It’s intricately designed and it takes a moment for you to finally see it, to finally understand, and the moment you do you exhale a wracked breath.

It’s not Wakandan fashion. It’s threaded with the colors and swirls of a place you haven’t called home in years. It has red flowers down the vest portion and multicolored rows down the sleeves and back. It’s made from a thick fabric that’s rarely used this century. Vintage — home.

“Steve…”

Steve clears his throat, “Now, I only did the flower parts. Okoye found it unfinished in… um…”

And there, where tags from brands would usually be, is a small threaded engraving.

‘From Bucky, To our muñeca.’

“He didn’t get to finish it so I thought I would — you know, help? — so it’s really from Buck. Probably an apology for not letting you visit him in Wakanda.”

Steve tries to push out a laugh at his poor joke, but you can see how he’s faltering. You reach up and wrap your arms around his neck, dragging him down so his knees bend, and pour as much nonverbal thank you’s into the hug. He hesitates at first, arms floating awkwardly, until he swallows his fear and wraps his arms around your waist. He holds you to him tightly and breathes in the sweet scent of your vanilla shampoo.

“Thank you.” Your voice is small, but Steve regards the delivery as powerful.

You wear it once, that Christmas night, enveloped in its warmth as you slept. In the morning, you hang it in the back of your closet.

A knock on your bedroom door sounds through your headphones. Bucky peeks his head in, “Is now a bad time?”

Sitting up, you pull the headphones from your ears. “Nope. Just thinking about how I’ve lived several years in the span of one week.”

Bucky lugs in a sports bag in one hand and a manila file in the other. He places them at the edge of your bed and proceeds to bounce in the available space near you. “Yeah, that can be annoying.”

You attempt to shove him away as he tries to steal your blanket. “Did you need anything?”

“Yeah.” He lets you take it, and simply turns on his side to face you. “What’s gonna happen between you and Steve?”

It’s an innocent question, but you know Bucky well enough to notice when he’s stressed. Steve probably told him to mind his business. “We’re good.”

He inspects your face with squinted eyes, “I know what you’re thinking so cut that shit out. This isn’t one of those missions where the feelings will just go away.”

“Funny thing is, I believe you,” you admit, watching as his face does something unexpected. His smile drops suddenly, like he didn’t expect you to agree with him, and then it’s immediately back full force.

“Peggy and Steve - right person, wrong time. You and Loki - right person, wrong time. You and Steve, all those years ago — right person, wrong time.” A weird thing happens: you agree with him again. “But now, after everything — right person, right time.”

“It’s just weird feeling like it’ll actually work.”

“That makes us seem like we’re all broken, doll. We’re not.”

You turn so you’re facing him; two mismatched parentheses. “We’re just tired.”

“We’re just tired,” Bucky agrees, smiling. “I’m not saying don’t look over your shoulder whenever you feel like it. Hell, I still look over mine.”

Snorting, you roll closer to hug him. He pulls you into his chest. “You give amazing pep talks.”

“Yeah, I don’t know why they gave that trophy to Steve.” Bucky shares the intimate moment for as long as it takes before the blanket starts overheating. He groans as he sits up to retrieve the things he brought with him. “By the way, our mutual friend sends one last warm regards.”

Bucky throws the sports bag onto your lap. “What’s this?”

“Your shit.”

You don’t even want to ask him how he packed your things without your knowledge. “Kicking me out, Barnes?”

“Clothes, toothbrush, shampoo and conditioner, pads, the quilt I just finished knitting thank you very much,” Bucky lists and hands you the file. “Maribel found him.”

“Ramirez?”

“Your dad.”

You snap your head up to look at him. Bucky expects to see anger, hurt, maybe even betrayal. He was prepared for it. But you just look confused, lost for words, maybe even scared. “Goes by Richard these days. Lives with his wife in Wisconsin, no kids, keeps to himself.”

You flip through the files, holding your breath. The file is small, Richard’s information only covering the first page, the rest just drabble. He seems relatively normal, looks normal even; normal job, normal credit score, normal upbringing. It doesn’t even seem real. You close the file and set it aside. “So you are sending me away?”

Bucky smirks, “It’s a suggestion. But I took the liberty of doing the hard part for you.”

“Yeah, because packing my lady products is the climax of this story.”

It didn’t go unnoticed that Bucky called Richard your ‘dad’. Everyone either referred to Ernesto as ‘your father’ or by his name. Steve had said ‘dad’ a few times before he met him, then he never said it again. Hell, even you did sometimes.

It’s a sweet distinction and you’re certain Bucky said it on purpose. Bucky takes your hands in his, “It’s been a long time coming. But at least we can both say that the people who hurt us can’t hurt us any longer.”

You can. You really can.

Bucky’s already packed Steve’s shit as well. Steve’s just shoving extra socks into his bag when someone knocks on the door. He expects Bucky or Sam, final words of encouragement, but it’s Scott. And he’s standing there grinning like a mad man.

“So, what’s the verdict, Rogers? You going after her or not?”

Steve huffs a laugh, “Think you already know the answer to that, Lang.”

Scott closes the door behind him and leans back against it. He shoves his hands in his sweater pockets, “Not that it should matter, shut me up if I cross any line, but everyone supports this.”

“Weirdly, I think it does matter. We’ve had you guys picking sides for two years. Selfishly. Like we were having a fucking civil war after everything.”

“Yeah, well.”

Steve huffs a laugh. It’s always going to surprise him just how comfortable Scott is around him now. Not afraid to tease him or call him out on something he doesn’t agree with. It’s refreshing.

“I’m not giving up on her, Scott. Not again.”

Scott nods. Perhaps breaking the mission ethic code wasn’t a bad thing after all, Scott thinks. He gives Steve a proud smile, genuine. “Then I hereby declare our hanging conversation officially closed.”

Steve wanders from his bedroom, to the conference room, to the main living room without an end destination in mind, seeming to just follow his quick feet as they lead him around the halls of the compound. He’s proud of himself, really, because he truly believes he’s learned to swallow his pride, has opened himself up to the possibility of being happy, and accepted that the world has changed and will continue to alter whether he likes it or not. He was, is, and will always be a man out of time — he’ll never fit but goddamn does he feel settled. He hasn’t felt this sane since before the war — which one? — so he relishes in the feeling for a few calm seconds.

He feels tears well-up on his water line and feels the pressure in his temples. He’s at a crossroads — both proud of himself for finally choosing the path he wants and relieved that this week, this mission he has dreaded for almost ten years, is over. He doesn’t know if he should sleep for a month or occupy his time with other things awaiting repair. A build up of five years, grief and loss and happiness all weirdly mixed into one pot, and Steve simply hasn’t noticed the improper portions of each ingredient.

It’s too much.

He thinks about his mental health. Shot to Hell, he jokes with himself. He’s already got the virtual therapy appointments scheduled. He figures he’ll get better with time and if Steve knows one thing for sure, it’s that he’s got a whole lot of that.

He thinks about Sam and Bucky and Scott — his three best friends that have gone to the ends of the Earth and back for him, and who would proudly do it all over again. He thinks about their kind words, their gentle touch, their devotion that Steve still sometimes feels he doesn’t deserve.

And he thinks about you. To anyone else, this was written in the damn stars. No, there wasn’t anything extremely obvious in the first few years. You were friends. Friends that grew to consider each other teammates. Teammates that drew a drop of blood while fighting on opposite sides. Teammates that recognized the true endgame, teammates that helped each other escape, teammates that went silent for two years. Two years of no contact, no signal of survival. Then again, teammates who stood by as their world crumbled around them. Teammates who grew to be friends again, leaning on free shoulders and seeking help through happy conversations and long nights. Friends that brought the world together again, only to rip each other from their own. Friends into the most bizarre of enemies. And enemies back to teammates.

Steve wipes a hand down his face as he fixes the strap over his shoulder. The common room is empty — he likes it this way. That means everyone is either napping, getting food, visiting friends or family, simply living life. The silence is therapeutic.

His eyes fall on a crooked picture frame near the television. He tries to ignore it, almost to the door and ready for another road trip, but he steps back. Then forward, then back again. He groans in frustration of himself and moves to turn the frame back in place, holding it for a few seconds until it stays. But as he lets go, it tilts once more. He tries again — it tilts back.

He pulls the frame from the hook and turns it over. He rightly freezes, the presence of a small pink paper airplane taped near the edge knocking the wind from his constricting lungs. He pulls it off, careful to not tear the delicate post-it.

He never found it. Natasha probably placed it behind this very picture frame in the other compound for him to find. Surely the explosion should have destroyed it — but it didn’t. It’s right here, perfectly intact, just a smudge of dirt on one of its wings. The frame hadn’t been damaged either. It’s real.

He holds the thin piece of paper like it’s the most precious thing in the world.

Steve turns it over between his fingers a few more times, before he carefully folds it back in half and puts it in his wallet. “You’ve got some nerve, Nat. But I hear ya.”

Steve decides to write you back. He hides the letter in that sweater he knows you don’t wear anymore, in the far back of your closet, and marvels at the intricate stitching while he can. He poured his heart out, even if it’s not guaranteed you’ll ever see it.

‘Yes, I found your letter. I found it when I was looking for perfume in your suitcase. The tape was loose and I violated your privacy. I’m truly sorry for that.

But I felt compelled to write you back, in case the reverse happened and I died instead of you. I didn’t write it then, when you were drying your hair in front of that impossibly small mirror you so weirdly called ‘a stupid little bitch’. And you looked so beautiful. But I’m writing it now and maybe I’ll share it with you in person when we’re both ready.

When the world turned to dust, I held on to you. I know exactly why. Natasha bugged me about it also, teasing me whenever I would glance at you too long, or give you the last remaining Oreos I was planning on eating, or whenever I would leave your room in the mornings after a nightmare. She knew nothing was happening between us, but she had this smile whenever she caught me. Like she was happy I was comforting you, and in turn seeking comfort for myself.

You remember how her smile would tilt up more on the left side?

There isn’t a proper way to truly apologize for hurting you. But I will spend the rest of my life trying to make up for it. You at least deserve that.

I returned a different man. And I think that was for the better.

Yes, I wanted the quiet life. I still think I do. And I think you know this — you have always seen right through me.

I now know what Natasha saw. You irritate me, you damn near make me want to choke myself out, but I care for you. We hold each other up, and I’m always rooting for you, and I’m always by your side. No matter how annoying and smart-mouthed you may be.

You’re my best friend — I hope I’m one of yours.

Steve.’

There’s no one currently in the compound who really knows how to change the battery in your car. Bucky tries, does a rather good job too, but he claims he’s winging it and that you should call a mechanic just in case. He leaves you there with two random batteries on the ground, hood of your car open, and without any idea of what to do next. So you chill and wait for the mechanic you hope isn’t going to jack up the price just because he knows who you are.

But he doesn’t seem fazed by you at all — or at the fact he just had to drive through countless checkpoints and security checks just to get on Avengers property. He changes the battery and changes the oil, hooking you up with as many upgrades he can. He even offers to wash it until you thank him repeatedly and that Really, really, you don’t have to do that. Thank you so much!

“Quite a garage you got here.”

There are unfinished projects and random wires falling from the ceiling and enough tools to supply five garages. It’s messy, but it was Tony’s. You accept the compliment and see him out.

“Eh, make sure those windshield wipers work. I hear it’s gonna rain tomorrow.”

You thank him again. The clouds to the west are gray, getting darker as the expanse stretches, but from where you’re standing everything’s blue. You figure the mechanic was right: it’s gonna rain, and it’s gonna rain hard.

The mechanic did good, all things considered. You never thought your old, beat-up Honda could look a few years younger. You flick one of the wipers lightly, testing its strength. It holds, as does the other, but when you go to lift it up it stops halfway. Without wanting to break it, you don’t force it. There’s something blocking the switch.

You grab it before it can accidentally fall into a deep slot; the figurehead of a man, curly hair and beard that matches Steve’s, who also has a prominent and strong nose. You turn the coin over a few times before looking around the garage, down the street, at the remote area where the mechanic has just left. Standing there, mouth agape, you wonder just how in the world you missed the mechanic placing it there.

You were lacking in the spy department nowadays. Oops.

You know you’re not going to find Ramirez. But him giving this back to you? It was his way of saying he’s alright and that he owes you many thanks.

You pocket the coin and accept the fact you just got bested.

It should take a few hours before you hit the first motel. Wisconsin isn’t that far, but you do have to pass through about hundred “middle of nowhere’s”. You pull out of the garage and check your mirrors — completely unaware of the super soldier running full speed to the passenger door. Steve carefully throws it open, somewhat aware of his strength, and lands into the seat beside you.

You hit the brakes hard. “Oh my! Rogers!”

Steve sucks in a few heavy breaths, like he literally ran across the compound to make it. “What? I startle you?”

“What are you doing here?”

“What are you doing? Aren’t you on house arrest?”

You squint at him, “Touche.” Putting the car in park, you turn your whole body to face him. “Answer my question.”

“Thought you were just gonna leave without saying goodbye?” Steve asks, expression much more teasing than serious.

“I’ll be gone for three days tops,” you say, waving your hand in the air. Steve smiles at you, seemingly waiting for you to speak again. You roll your eyes, “You’re coming with me, aren’t you?”

Steve lifts up the small duffel bag you hadn’t seen when he first got into the car. He throws it into the backseat and smiles lovingly at you. “I’ve been told that I’m impossible to get rid of, so yeah.”

“Rhodey said that the ankle bracelet they gave me wasn’t a trusted model. Easy to break off, like they did it on purpose.” You lean toward him, holding your chin up with the palm of your hand. “Should be able to drive free for a few weeks before they suspect anything.”

“Already booked us a cabin for Thanksgiving.”

“What makes you think that I even want you to accompany me on this road trip? Did you like the first one?”

Steve clears his throat and mimes like he’s writing on paper. The next words out of his mouth make your legs turn cold. “No matter how annoying and smart-mouthed you may be, there’s nowhere in the world I’d rather be than here, there, and everywhere with you.”

You blink multiple times, as if that would fix your ears. “...You. Fucking. Didn’t.” Steve reaches over to try and hug you. “No, don’t.” He squeezes harder, smooshing your face in his chest. “Steeeeve!”

“It fell out of your suitcase during the mission and I just… looked,” Steve reasons. He allows you to escape his grip.

“You just looked?”

Steve sighs. He really does look guilty. He pushes a strand of your hair behind your ear, letting his fingers tickle your skin. “I’m sorry I read it. I’ll get out of this car for real if you want me to.”

You arch an eyebrow, “You’re a little shit, but I’m not mad. No one understands privacy these days.”

Steve smiles wide enough for his dimples to pop and his eyes to crinkle. “I’d follow you anywhere, doll.”

“Anywhere?”

“Just name it.”

Humming low, you lean forward. He follows your direction like you’re a lighthouse beaming with light, capturing your lips with his in a sweet kiss. He hooks a large hand behind your head to press you to him harder. You smell like that vanilla scented shampoo he loves so much and feels his heart constrict with a pleasant pulse.

You pull back for air and smile against Steve’s soft lips.

“Well, I’m headed for the middle of buttfuck Wisconsin—”

“Just drive!”

Bursts of laughter fill the car until you’re past the checkpoints and well onto the long roads. The clouds continue to turn darker but they’re inviting, alluring, and it’s not insane that both of you desire thunderstorms because they remind you of family.

Steve watches you from the passenger seat, memorizing the contours and edges of your profile. The roots in his heart begin spreading again; the meat of his heart filling with a soothing promise that his time on earth is no longer rootless. He’s dug his feet in, he’s watered all he’s needed to water, and he feels it spreading within him like newly blossomed flowers in the spring. He has a sudden urge to take out his drawing pad to immortalize the way your mouth tilts higher up on the right side when you smile, to record it forever.

But he’ll remember it. He’ll remember well into this timeline, several years down the road, and even when he’s resting in his grave. So he leans his head back against the seat and chooses to watch the curves of every expression you grace him with. He immortalizes the sound of your voice, the taps of your fingers against the steering wheel, and the accented way you say his name.

There’s a long drive ahead, but he’s excited for it. He’s excited for you. Steve promises himself that he’ll ask you a million questions, and give you a million answers, and share a million more stories.

Right now, he just needs to sleep.

THE END.

Taglist: @dumb-ass-3 @justab-eautifulmess @supraveng @mycosmicparadise @missnighttigress

#captainsimagines #Steve Rogers #steve rogers fanfic #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers x reader #reader x steve rogers #avengers fanfic #avengers x reader #marvel fanfiction #chapter ten #to topple a giant #to topple a giant finale #avengers mob fanfic #by Moni

26 notes · View notes

thran-duils · 4 years ago

Text

Lost in Zero Gravity (P.16)

Title: Lost In Zero Gravity (Part Sixteen) Summary: Fem!Reader x Mob Boss!Tony Stark x Mob Boss!Steve Rogers. Reader is a call girl who runs high end parties. She catches the attention of Tony Stark who invites her back to his room with his friend. She might have performed too well because she becomes their new favorite play toy and they don’t like to share. Words: 4,759 Warnings (for the fic in entirety): Smut, prostitution, infidelity, angst, domestic violence, stalking, possessive behavior, drug use Author’s Note: Shit is popping off, bye. Also, drug use in this chapter from Steve again. Just a bit harder than weed this time.

Part Fifteen || Part Seventeen || Masterpost (mobile) || Fanfic masterpost

The trip back from your grandparent’s was depressing. But again, rules and following them, to buy you some freedom in the future. You were playing the long game even if it meant some short-term uncomfortableness.

You had not opened your gifts before you left and you did not dare bring any of them with you, not knowing what they were. You would have been mortified to open a sex toy or something in front of your family from Tony or Steve. When you got home, you threw your suitcase down, changed into comfortable pajamas, and set to work opening them. It was the 26th but you were still alone, Tony and Steve keeping the weekend at home since Christmas had landed on Saturday.

Some of the gifts seemed more for them than you. Dresses and lingerie you were sure you would be asked to wear. Not to be ungrateful, the dresses were not cheap in the slightest, and they were pretty. You collected the gift cards happily.

There were thoughtful ones though. Steve had gotten you some new wireless headphones better equipped for movement. So, he had been listening when you complained that you wanted ones that stayed in your ears better when you were working out. Tony had bought your favorite Dior perfume, no doubt noticing you were getting low.

You sent them a text thanking them before popping some popcorn and getting onto the couch to snuggle with Luna. You had been able to go home and see your family and come back to your warm apartment. Christmas had actually gone better than you had expected.

<><><>

Steve stepped in Tony’s office on Tuesday, and said, “I didn’t feel like sending someone for food. I want to go out. Wanna join me?”

Tony looked up from the hologram he was working with and shrugged. “I’ll come with, but I brought lunch, so I won’t be eating with you,” Tony said, pointing down at the glass Tupperware.

Steve asked slowly, “You ‘brought’ lunch?” Tony nodded, taking a bite. “Since when do you bring lunch?”

“Y/N made it. She always makes herself food and sometimes I want it and today happened to be one of those days, so I took some,” Tony explained, his attention fixated back on the hologram.

Steve hovered in the doorway for a moment before sighing, “Well, I don’t want to be the only one eating at the table, so maybe I should just go by myself. You look busy anyway.” Tony nodding in half acknowledgment, engrossed in the problem in front of him. “I’ll leave you to it then.”

<><><>

You saw Steve had texted you as you got ready to go out the door to go to the building’s gym.

Don’t eat and if you have, then get ready anyway. I wanna go out to lunch.

I haven’t eaten. What time?

I’m heading over now.

Well, that ruined going to the gym. You tossed your headphones back on the kitchen table as you walked by. He had texted again.

Wear that cocktail dress I got you for Christmas.

Steve was waiting for you downstairs in his BMW forty minutes later. He had taken longer than you expected him too and you would not have rushed with your hair and makeup otherwise. When you opened the door, you found a bouquet of roses on the seat. You picked them up and got in, closing the door.

“For me?” you asked, surprised, smiling at him.

“Course,” Steve answered, shooting you a smile in return.

“What’s the occasion?”

Steve shrugged, “We’re going out to lunch. Why not treat it like a date and give you a gift? You deserve it.”

Taking a deep inhale, you savored the sweet scent of them.

“Seatbelt, dove,” he reminded.

“Right,” you laughed, putting the flowers down in your lap and grabbing your seatbelt and putting it on.

“That dress looks fantastic, by the way. Hugs you in all the right places. You’re gonna be the hottest woman in the restaurant,” Steve told you before pulling away from the curb.

<><><>

“Well, that’s very New Years of you,” Tony said, as you turned the camera to show him in the mirror. You had called him at the party, wanting to get his approval before you left the apartment with Terrence. “Completely sparkling.”

“Thought it was appropriate,” you told him.

“You were right,” Tony replied. “You look lovely.”

“I am all ready. I can come now.” Tony was quiet and you asked after a few moments, “Tony?”

It was still a few more seconds before he said, “Alright, well, you are a bit early, but you can mingle around here at the party, can’t you? Without getting yourself into trouble with any sordid men?”

You asked, “Why would I do that?”

“I don’t think you would, I was just teasing.”

“No, I mean, why do I have to mingle alone?”

Tony cleared his throat on the other end of the FaceTime call. “That’s the plan. You come to the hotel, we’ve got the room ready, and then we will meet you in the room.” You said nothing, staring at him expectantly. He sighed now seeing you were not going to relent on the issue, “Wives are here.”

You scoffed quietly, “They’re going to be there? You didn’t tell me that!”

“Well, I didn’t think there was going to be a need to because you were supposed to come close to midnight and just go up to the room. Not 10:00 and want to come to the party.”

“What is the point of a New Year’s party at a hotel if I’m not at the party?” You saw Tony was going to say something and cut in before he could roughly, “She’s gonna see me!”

Tony knew exactly who she was.

“She might,” Tony admitted, sounding uncomfortable.

You shook your head, “I’m not comfortable with that. I don’t want to be there. You can’t ask me to be there.”

“Y/N—”

“Please don’t make me,” you pleaded. “Can’t you guys just come back here? I don’t want to run into her anywhere in the hotel. The hall, the lobby, the party. Can’t you understand that?” Tony ground his teeth and you pressed, “Please. Just come back here. I’ll be ready for you whenever you come home.”

You saw the look in his eyes at the term ‘home’. You closed your mouth, thinking you had pressed your luck by insinuating that this was home for him. It was a buzzed slip up. Shit.

Finally, Tony broke the tension and said, “Yeah, I’ll tell Steve we will just go back to the apartment. It’s not a big deal.”

Relief flooded through you that you had not insulted him.

“Okay, I’ll be here. Promise.”

“I know you will be.” He hung up.

<><><>

Alessia and Cecile excused themselves to go to the restroom, leaving Tony and Steve standing in the ballroom. Steve pointed his attention at Tony, “Saw Y/N called. What did she want?”

“She got ready early and wanted to come early,” Tony said, swirling his whiskey around in his glass.

“Early? Is she here already then? Are Terrence and Daryl with her? Oscar and William were supposed to take over for them so they could go celebrate,” Steve asked.

“No,” Tony told him, shaking his head. “She’s not coming at all.”

Steve faced Tony fully now, agitated, and demanded, “What? We had a room set up here.”

“She didn’t want to come.”

Steve stared at him flabbergasted and sputtered, “And?”

“She said she wasn’t comfortable. And you know, I could see why,” Tony said shrugging, taking a drink. “She didn’t want Alessia to see her. Didn’t want to risk running into her. Still bad blood there, understandably.”

“Tony—” Steve started impatiently.

“We can just go back to the apartment afterward, Steve. It’s not a big deal. What is she going to do there other than hang out and drink?”

“Tony, we agreed she was coming here.”

“Like I said, I made an executive decision and I’m sorry I didn’t consult you first. But I honestly didn’t feel like arguing with her about it.”

“Right. You didn’t feel like arguing. You just didn’t want to upset her,” Steve said annoyed. Tony looked indignant by his response, but Steve pressed on, leaning in, “I have Cecile here and I was gonna sneak out of the room to go to another room here. What am I gonna do if she texts me asking where I’m at? I know you don’t have to worry about that because Alessia is just going to go home without you but fuck, think about what I need to do, huh?”

“She’ll know what happened. Do you think she’s stupid? And Y/N is 15 minutes away in good traffic.”

“Well, the traffic is not good is it, Tony?” Steve retorted sourly. “It’s New Years!”

“Steve, it’ll be fine. Here, they’re coming back,” Tony said the last part out of the corner of his mouth spotting Cecile and Alessia returning from the bathroom.

Steve snapped, “I’m gonna go enjoy some more of that blow I just indulged in and I’ll just… deal.”

He walked off before the women got back and Cecile asked, “Where’s he off to?”

“Grabbing some finger food or something, I don’t know,” Tony said, his arm coming around Alessia’s waist. She did not react, letting him rest his hand at her hip. He held his bourbon out to her and asked, “Fancy a drink?”

“It is New Years,” Alessia said, taking it from him and taking a drink.

<><><>

Terrence’s phone buzzed and he pulled it out looking at it. “Oh, they’re here. Downstairs. Wondering where we all are.”

“I’m still enjoying the night air,” you said, reclined on one of the chairs on the rooftop terrace.

You had your legs crossed, a drink in hand. You were not toasted but you were feeling good. The three of you had gone to the roof to watch the fireworks around the city. There was a good enough view in all directions, and it had not been disappointing.

Daryl took another drag on his joint and held it out to Terrence who took it gratefully. “We should go back inside.”

“Or they could come up here and join us,” you told them.

“We aren’t even supposed to be up here.”

“Who is going to stop us?” you muttered, your eyes drawn to the fireworks again. Someone must have paid a lot of money for this show. It had been going on since midnight off and on.

Terrence snorted and said, “Well, I for one would like to go to bed. Not to sleep though. And the clubs are still open, so I can go find someone to take home.”

“That sounds like a good idea,” Daryl agreed, pointing at him.

Rolling your eyes, you brought your glass up to your lips and finished it off. “God, fine. I won’t get in the way of you getting laid any longer.”

You stood up, snatching the bottle of rum off the table and began walking towards the door. Daryl and Terrence followed you back inside, closing the rooftop door behind the group of you.

Walking into the apartment, you found Steve and Tony sitting on the couches, Steve hunched over the table, doing a line. You rose your brows, never having seen him snort coke before, only smoke weed. You turned away from the scene and walked over to the kitchen to grab yourself some more mixer.

“We are heading out. Going to the clubs,” Terrence told Tony and Steve. “There’s gotta be someone desperate enough to go home with Daryl.”

“Fuck off,” Daryl said in response, while Tony snorted at the comment.

The pair of them made their leave as you made yourself another drink. “Tony, I know it’s not your thing, but do you want rum?”

“I am more than okay,” Tony responded from the couch. “Thank you though.”

You heard footsteps and Steve’s voice sounded, “Where are your shoes?”

“In my closet. I didn’t want to wear them,” you told him, turning around. “I didn’t leave them on the roof if that’s what you were worried about.”

Steve smirked at that, his pupils blown wide. He looked ravenously at you and you took a long drink, knowing you were probably in for a good fuck. It had been months since you found yourself in between them and now that they were both here, it was inevitable.

He reached out, touching at the fabric of your dress. “This is nice. Too bad I’m only seeing it for such a short while before we take it off you.”

“Do you want a picture?”

Steve chuckled at that, but his eyes flashed. He did not like the attitude. His hand came up to wrap around your neck. “I think you know what I want.”

Tony had stood up from the couch, stretching. He tossed his suit jacket on the back of the couch and your eyes slid back to Steve whose fingers flexed in, letting you know it was going to be a good fuck but at a price. He was definitely not going to be gentle; that was not the Steve you were getting tonight. A small part of you felt relief knowing Tony was here hopefully to keep him more in check. You finished your drink completely before turning around.

“Can you help me unzip?” you asked him.

Steve’s hands came to your zipper, pulling it down. Feeling the dress fall loose, you began walking towards the hall to go down to the bedroom. You let it fall as you walked, kicking it off to the side of the hall before you shoved your underwear down, letting them fall as well and leaving them outside the bedroom.

“It’s like a sexy Hansel and Gretel bread trail,” Steve joked, coming into the bedroom, Tony following.

You smiled sensually over your shoulder at him before crawling onto the bed and lying back on the center of the bed, legs tucked up.

Steve was busy undressing, as Tony advanced to the bed, unbuttoning his shirt. He tossed it aside as he came up to the edge of your bed. He reached out, grasping your ankles, and yanked you across the bed towards him.

“First thing I’m gonna eat in the New Year,” he winked. You giggled at that and he crawled onto the bed, pulling you even closer.

He spread your legs apart and wasted no time burying his face. You bucked against his tongue slightly, his beard tickling you. Tony’s fingers dug into the front of your thighs, his tongue slipping in and out of your channel before flicking up and sucking. A high-pitched whine left you, which only encouraged him further.

The bed dipped with Steve’s weight as he crawled up next to you. He was on his side, his dick jutting towards you. He grasped the back of your neck, pulling you closer. His cock pressed passed your lips into your warm mouth. He exhaled shakily feeling your tongue swirl around him. You were holding yourself as steady as you could with Tony was lapping, sucking at your bud. You groaned, adding to the sensation for Steve. His fingers flexed tighter on your throat and he gave a particularly rough thrust. You choked and tried to pull away, but he held tight, giving another rough thrust, his cock brushing the back of your throat. Your hands came up to push at his stomach, but he slapped at them, pressing back further now, holding himself there. You gagged before he pulled away.

He resumed a steady pace, but his hand was tight around your throat, holding you in place. You breathed through your nose, trying to not choke again and keep your lungs filled. It was proving more and more difficult the more Tony worked you up. It was coming on quick, and you were rolling your hips towards him. He increased his speed and a strangled moan fell from you. Shaking, you came, Tony eagerly tasting and not wasting a drop. You relaxed despite the burning in your chest against the bed as Steve slowed, noticing you had orgasmed.

“Got you good and ready,” Tony growled, wiping at his mouth as he pulled away.

“Oh, let me,” Steve husked, pulling away from you.

Steve winked at you as he moved down the bed as you breathed raggedly, trying to fill your lungs again.

Tony moved away to give Steve the floor at your pussy and Steve took his place. Steve filled you all too easily with how wet you were from Tony’s skill and your orgasm. His thrusts were rough, your breasts bouncing with the movements. Steve leaned forward, hiking your hips up to hit at a new angle as he kissed and sucked at your breasts, nipping up to your neck. He pressed his forehead to yours and pulled you closer for a kiss. He was savage, sucking in your bottom lip and biting. You whimpered and he did it again.

“Good girl,” he praised as you gasped, your pussy clenching against him hitting your core. “Gonna fuck you so goddamn good.”

You nodded, trying to be the good girl he wanted, and he kissed you again, dominating, before pulling away and resuming his brutal pace. You were focused on him, not wanting to look away. He was getting close, not a surprise considering how he had used your mouth.

Steve’s groan of release was dripping with arousal as you felt warmth spurting; he was buried deep. Leaning forward again, he gave you another kiss, pressing in roughly.

Pulling away, he let you drop. Tony who had been walking around the room, keeping himself ready at the sight of Steve fucking you replaced him. Tony entered; his weight pressed down on you. You keened, feeling full of him as he settled, holding you in place. His kisses were deep, his tongue slipping into your mouth as he cradled you close.

Coming up for air, you turned your head to let Tony kiss at your neck and shoulder as he started a steady thrusting up into you. Your fingers dug into his upper back, your legs flexing in and out on his thighs with his movements, watching his face as he relished in you. He was all passion, intimate, cradling you.

<><><>

The table was long, and Tony and Steve found chairs next to each other, their two guys standing behind them. They both hated these quarterly meetings with other business and mob bosses close on the east coast. Sometimes international bosses joined if they were in town and they knew damn well who they were going to see, which only made them even more on edge about being in the room. Tony was prepared with his nano tech in case things went sideways as always; a shield really to prevent anyone from starting anything.

Tony and Steve refrained from looking at each other, instead keeping their faces void of any emotion seeing Laurie sit down across from them, choosing that seat on purpose.

Laurie was snide when he asked, “Fancy seeing the two of you here.”

“Yeah, what a fucking surprise,” Tony retorted. “A planned meeting we were all expected to come to and we see each other.”

“How I miss your humor, Stark.”

“Glad to hear you like at least one thing about me.”

Laurie chuckled and then asked, “How is your prostitute?”

Tony’s jaw ticked at the word, but he managed to respond curtly, “Fine. Thank you for asking.”

The corner of Laurie’s lips up ticked. “But she was out with Rogers. I was asking him.”

Coolly, Steve responded, “I think Tony answered well enough for me.”

Laurie looked between the two of them as people kept filing into the room and finding their own seats. An amused smile came across his lips. “That must be a thing to share. But less messy, yes? I understand that.”

He must have assumed that Steve had taken Y/N out without telling Tony and he had been hoping to stir something up between them. A reason he had asked in English so Steve would hear rather than in French to just address Tony.

“It would be more comfortable for me if you weren’t so obsessed with my sex life,” Steve drawled, meeting his eyes.

Laurie snorted, “It is not your sex life I am ‘obsessed’ with, Rogers. I am obsessed with you messing with my market.”

“Don’t take that up with me. Take that up with your customers.”

“You are causing my customers to turn away! You need to keep your fucking bullshit here. Do not get involved in my country! You think you can run everything just because you are American!”

“Maybe you should do your job better,” Steve retorted coldly.

Face hardening, Laurie started to lean across the table, but Tony stood up, interrupting. “Alright. Everyone’s here.”

Laurie reluctantly settled back in his seat, his eyes boring into Steve across the table, who only returned a fiery look.

<><><>

“Christ, I need some relief,” Steve muttered, rubbing at his eyes as they walked out of the building after the meeting. The two of them had waited until everyone else was gone before leaving the room.

Their car was waiting in the alley for them, and they walked towards it.

Tony was busy on his phone and said, “Well, if you mean Y/N, that’s going to take a while.”

“Why?”

“They’re out doing errands. Picking up prescriptions and grocery shopping.”

Steve’s demeanor changed at the mention of that, and he snapped, “I’ll pick up her prescription. Tell them not to worry about that.”

Tony’s face screwed up in confusion, “Why?”

“Because Tony, I can do it. Just tell her to let me do it,” Steve said tightly as they reached the car.

“Well, she already did it, Steve. They’ve left the pharmacy. They’re grocery shopping now.”

Steve rested his hand on the side of the car, taking a deep breath. Exhaling sharply, he sighed annoyed. “Fuck… fine.” He muttered, “Fucking all I needed.”

He opened the door to get in aggressively, and Tony stopped him with, “What’s going on?”

“What do you mean?” Steve asked, stilling, shooting Tony a hard look over the roof of the car.

“You seem very stressed about that.”

“I’m stressed about this goddamn meeting and Laurie trying to start shit.”

“Yeah, but you almost lost your shit when I mentioned this.” Steve said nothing, his hand still on the door. Tony cocked his head and said, “I can read you like a book.”

Their guys had not gotten into the car yet, ready to defend the two bosses if need be from outside threats.

Tony was staring at him still and Steve said, “I just… I can handle the prescriptions.”

“Why? What are you keeping from me?”

Steve’s tongue ran along the bottom of his mouth, staring at Tony. “It doesn’t matter.”

“No. It matters if you are keeping something from me. Remember how pissed you were about me not telling you about Laurie?”

Losing it at him not dropping it, Steve exclaimed, “Fine, Tony! I’m giving her placebos!”

Tony stepped back from the car, closing the door. Steve hung his head, exhaling deeply at the admission. Tony demanded, “Placebos for what? Her birth control?”

Not looking up, Steve answered tightly, “Yes.”

“Are you kidding me, Steve?” Tony exclaimed, flabbergasted.

“Stop it, Tony,” Steve said weakly, shaking his head.

Tony scoffed loudly, “No. Tell me. Are you fucking kidding me, Steve?”

Their guys were waiting there uncomfortably, watching Tony walked around the back of the car to come to Steve’s side to be close. Steve straightened up, slamming his door closed too when Tony got close.

“What the fuck?” Tony shouted, throwing his hands out. His veins in his temple were pulsing. “For how fucking long?” Steve said nothing and Tony demanded again, “How long, Steve?”

“Not long, chill out. It’s been a month.”

Tony balked at that, “A month? Steve, do you realize how much we have been fucking her unprotected?”

“Yeah, that’s kind of the point of the placebos, Tony. To get her pregnant.”

“What… why…” Tony sputtered before shouting again, “What the fuck were you thinking?”

“What the fuck are you thinking?”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“I’m not the one falling in love with her! That’s you!” Steve shouted at him, getting in his face now. Tony said nothing, staring at him, fury etched in his features. “She’s a whore, Tony. A toy for us. Something to spoil so she spreads her legs for us. That’s all. I mean, at least isn’t that what you told me to think of her as when I was getting too close? Seems like you’re not following your own advice! ‘Don’t let your marriage shit leak into this’. You’re failing miserably. I’ll be surprised if you last the year without completely moving in with her and taking her up as your new wife.”

“Watch it, Steve,” Tony returned dangerously.

“Oh, I have been watching! You give her too much power! And you know how that’s gonna end up? Just like how Alessia is! Just like how Cecile is to me! You have to keep a firm grip on their will. We both fucked that up with our wives. Especially me! And look where I am! Not knowing if my inheritance is going towards my own damn kid or some fucking second rate fuckhead. And I will not be making that mistake again. No, Y/N stays right beneath my thumb! I would advise you to take a step back and evaluate and make sure you do the fucking same so you don’t end up having yet another bitch tugging on your strings and holding you hostage! So what if I’m using her for this? It’s not like she’s not going to be taken care of!”

Tony looked murderous and he spat, “Steve, for all you fucking know, I could have gotten her pregnant! And you didn’t even tell me! Jesus CHRIST!”

Steve threw his hand up and gave a scornful laugh, “Yeah, sure, it might be yours. But I would much rather give my inheritance to your kid than some fucking low life masseuses kid!”

Tony’s hand came to his face, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he tried to control his anger. It took him a few minutes, turning around and taking a couple steps away from Steve.

When he turned back, his voice was eerily calm as he said, “Don’t come to the apartment.”

“Excuse me?” Steve asked, his pupils pinned, anger etched in his features, taking a step towards Tony.

“You heard me,” Tony growled.

“You think you can stop me?”

“I don’t want to have to stop you, Steve,” Tony grated. “I want you to do the right thing.”

“’The right thing’?” Steve said and then laughed.

“You’re not dealing with this right. Whatever emotional turmoil you’re going through with Cecile,” Tony said. “Don’t come to the apartment for a while. You—”

“No, you’re becoming possessive!” Steve shouted, closing the space, and getting in Tony’s face. Tony did not flinch much to their guys shock who had taken a half step forward to intervene. “I insulted your little, darling slut. And you’re upset about it!”

“Shut your mouth,” Tony said in warning.

“What? You don’t like hearing that? Hearing how you’ve become pussy-whipped? You got yourself wrapped up tight in that cunt! She bats her perfect, little doe eyes, pouts, and you do whatever she asks. And she’s had a lot of time to weave herself into you since you’re fucking living there already basically!”

Tony shook his head, turning around.

“Oh, right, just walk off instead of talking about it! And I know where you’re going! You’re gonna go to her and act wounded, and she’ll lick your wounds.”

Steve stopped hearing whirring and it took him a split second to realize Tony had tapped his reactor and the suit was building itself.

“I’m not going to tell you a third time, Steve,” Tony said from inside the suit. “Take the car and go home.” Steve laughed, malice in it. But Tony pressed on firmly, ignoring him, “You are gonna get your head on straight. If you have any respect for me at all. Or for her, for that matter.”

Without another word, he shot up into the air, leaving Steve on the ground in the alley.

~~~

Forever tags: @coconutqueen21 @undecidedsworld

Fic tags: @icant-hangout-imdrumming @oceaniamaddness @multifandom-superlover @imsonick @holl2712 @here4thefanfics @agustdowney @fanofalltheficsx @buttercandy16

#tony stark x reader #steve rogers x reader #dark!tony stark #dark!steve rogers #dark marvel fic #dark marvel #dark tony stark #dark steve rogers #my shit

102 notes · View notes

icequeenbae · 4 years ago

Text

Desert Flower (m) Ch. 3 | BBH

Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader x Baëkhyun

Characters: EXO and X-EXO (not all of them mentioned)

EXO vs X-EXO dynamics, complicated relationships, angsty, action, smut (as usual)

Warnings: sorta mingling with your ex’s ‘evil twin’, mentions of blood/ violence (nothing too graphic… I suppose), Y/N gets teary a lot(?), explicit content, rough sex, unprotected sex

Word Count: ~13.5k (full), ~4.5k (Chapter 3)

Summary: Baekhyun, your beloved boyfriend of three years, suddenly breaks up with you and disappears from the city in an attempt to protect you. But leaving you alone and clueless means trouble will surely find you. For it is easy to spot a flower in the desert.

Masterlist >> One >> Two (m) >> Three (m) >> Four (fin)

Author’s Note: Heyy! How’re you guys doing so far?^^ Sooo, this chapter is the longest of all since the story begins to unfold here! The next one is the finale already, and it’s going to be pretty epic, dare I say;) Let me know what kind of plot twists you’re anticipating! 💥

Tags: @blahblahblah-boo @baeklightsx @wooya1224 @baekklove

Chapter 3. The little birdie told me

For an entire week after you first had sex, you’d stayed away. You felt guilty and foolish for letting that happen. Was he a rebound? Was it even acceptable that you did it with your ex-boyfriend’s twin? Could you live with yourself, knowing what he tasted like, or how his voice became gruff as he really got into it? And, worst of all, you wanted to experience that again. You were virtually ashamed to recall the night you’d spent with him, his roughness that left bruises (not entirely unpleasant), his bossiness that made you come out of your own shell to take what you wanted, what you needed, from him. Thinking back to the way you slammed yourself onto his thighs, or how he then folded you in half and made you come, or the name-calling… It was unbearable because despite believing that you’d made a shameless mistake, you wanted to make it all over again. You wanted to feel his prickly touch on your skin, and his prurient eyes not missing a single curve of your body. You wanted to be pushed by him, and you couldn’t understand the nature of any of those desires. Was it because you’d developed feelings for him? Or because he offered you such a pleasant way of self-destruction?

In his hands, you fell apart and reassembled. Not entirely the same, but then how could you be? The person who broke you had left for good, taking pieces of your puzzle with him. It seemed like a better option than to stay depressed and waiting to be fixed, ending up never achieving completeness.

Baëkhyun wasn’t a perfect fit for you, nor was he someone to heal your pain with the tenderness of his own heart. But only with him, you felt these strong emotions again. Only with him your heart was not aching but fluttering again, excited by the dangerous smirk he was wearing, and the predatory eyes that promised to devour you in the most delectable ways possible.

You stayed away, contemplating your decision and the rationale for it. The questions in your head seemed never-ending. Were you subconsciously trying to get back at Baekhyun? Were you replacing him? Or maybe you were just this quick in finding someone else to hand your still-broken heart over to? Baëkhyun did not seem like the guy who’d want it. He was kind of a bad guy, if you could even be the judge of that. Yet he had never actually hurt you, and he did not like to see you upset, even when it was over someone else.

Or because it was over someone else.

And although you didn’t consider him to be boyfriend material, you decided to give it a try. Not at all expecting it to be a relationship – you weren’t ready for a new one anyway. Still, you wanted to continue this unusual arrangement. Or so you’d been telling yourself when you texted him to come over after a week of radio silence.

As easy as it was for you to grow attached to him as your strange relationship quickly progressed, it should have been a warning sign. Baëkhyun kept asking you about the boys, the time you spent with Baekhyun at their base, and the stuff they’d told you about. And it wasn’t like you just spilled all the secrets – he usually asked about completely random stuff that seemed quite harmless to reveal.

But he was also a strategist. And you had no idea how powerful his mind was.

***

You laid your head on Baëkhyun’s chest, still hot and sweaty after the hours spent roughing up the bed. He stayed with you this time, arm wrapped around your waist intimately.

‘I didn’t expect you to be a natural,’ he hummed out of nowhere.

‘Hm?’ You turned slightly in his hold.

‘You’re getting pretty good at going after what you want. Will suit you well, being a little bad, birdie.’

‘Birdie?’ He met your curious eyes and chuckled, pressing you closer into his side.

‘Ain’t it accurate? You’re like a baby bird that I’m teaching how to fly.’ He stared for a moment. ‘You shouldn’t be down because of anyone anymore. I’d take personal offense if you are,’ he accentuated.

The uninvited warmth seeped into you, and you nuzzled his neck in a fit of affection.

‘Maybe you have to teach me more,’ you teased. ‘Scratch that. Teach me more.’

‘Now you’re just greedy,’ he sneered. ‘But I don’t mind.’

He allowed you to place a few kisses onto the side of his neck, before catching your hand, tracing his V-line down.

‘As much as I enjoy wrecking you, I don’t think you can take any more today.’

‘Aw, worried about me?’ You mocked, biting onto his collarbone playfully.

He squeezed your ass cheek in response.

‘Don’t test me. If you like a little more pain, it can be arranged. But not like this. It’s not what you truly want.’

‘How do you know that it’s not,’ you whined, as he patted your ass.

‘I know you, birdie. And I have a feeling that you’ve learned more about yourself in the last month than in the years prior. Care to give me some credit?’ His icy blue eyes gleamed in the dim lighting.

‘I really wanna blow you right now,’ you deadpanned. Baëkhyun was so, so alluring with that sexy hoarse laugh of his.

‘Wake me up with it tomorrow. If you want it that much.’

But the morning of slow lustful awakening didn’t come – instead, you awoke in an empty bed, alone. Brushing your teeth and washing up quickly, you headed to the kitchen to find your lover... And froze on the spot as soon as you caught bits of the hushed conversation.

‘I’m aware it’s been weeks but building trust takes time, you know? She’s already told me so much-’ Baëkhyun stopped mid-sentence, supposedly interrupted, and sighed. ‘Don’t. I’ll bring her in myself. Yes, I got it, Suhø. I’ll drag her in if I have to.’

You felt anxiety rise at his words, cold sweat breaking. Was he- talking about you? Or was he ‘building trust’ with some other girl? No, that was bound to be you. And who was he conversing with?

Everything was unclear, but your intuition had you tiptoeing back and walking from the bathroom to the kitchen a little louder this time. He finished his call as soon as you entered the kitchen.

‘Hey,’ he beamed at you as if the previous conversation did not take place.

‘Morning,’ you forced a little smile. ‘Were you talking to someone?’

‘Just now? Yeah,’ you feigned curiosity and wrapped your arms around his waist to avoid raising suspicion with your weird behavior or the slight nervous tremor in your hands. ‘Actually, I wanted to take you out today. You can meet some of my friends.’

‘Today?’ He nodded and you blinked, trying to come up with an excuse and fast. ‘Where?’

‘You’ll see. It’s not exactly in the city, so don’t dress all fancy,’ his hand settled on the small of your back.

It was clear now that earlier he had been talking to someone about bringing you in. And having your trust, which, obviously, was his goal from the very beginning. You realized that you needed to slip out carefully.

‘Um, about that… My friend from uni just called. She woke me up, actually. Asked to meet up today, and I already said yes, so…’ You trailed off.

‘Can’t you reschedule? We really should go tonight, while everyone’s in the neighborhood.’

‘Oh,’ you chewed on your lip. ‘She’s going through a rough time, so I have to meet her today. Sorry,’ you added, acting guilty.

He frowned, deep in thought.

‘Can we go after?’ He suggested. ‘I can pick you up in the evening.’

Biting your tongue, you weighed your options carefully. You did not want to alert him as to your attempt to shake him off your tail.

‘Yeah. Sure,’ you forced a smile on your face. ‘I’ll text you when I head back home for a change of clothes, and then we can go.’

‘Perfect,’ he smiled again, before pecking your lips. ‘I’ll head out for a few hours then,’ you nodded, walking him to the door.

Before Baëkhyun opened it, he turned around, catching you by surprise, and kissed you properly. The way he rarely kissed you outside your sex marathons. Deeply, full of… some kind of emotion? You couldn’t really grasp it, but your mind blanked out for a few seconds and you responded. Whimpering into his demanding mouth as his arms hugged you tightly to his body, you felt so tiny and defenseless, almost needy for his protection. But that was a deceiving sentiment.

‘Stay safe, little birdie,’ he whispered into your lips. ‘I’ll be waiting for your message. Don’t make me wait too long.’

‘Okay,’ you promised, and he finally walked out.

Closing the door, you let out a shaky sigh.

You were fucked.

At first, you almost had a panic attack, breath growing shallow and erratic. Having no idea what to do or how to get yourself out of this, you grabbed your phone and dialed the only number you could think of in this situation.

‘Please, Baekhyun,’ you whispered. ‘I’m so scared-’

But he was unavailable again.

Almost sobbing at the automatic answer, you dropped the phone and looked around. There was no one to help you, so you had to save yourself now. Wiping the tears, you grabbed your backpack and started shoving the most important items in it. Your documents, phone, wallet. A change of clothes. A pepper spray you found on your roommate’s shelf, which, you supposed, would be useless against someone like Baëkhyun. But did you have any other option? You had no powers and you would definitely not stand a chance against him in combat. Baekhyun used to train you a little, but you couldn’t even touch him in sparring unless he let you.

It was apparent that your only option was to run. So you did.

You jumped into the first cab you could get and asked the driver to head to the railway station. Making a mistake of not looking at him, you got onto your phone to try and figure out where to go from there. You didn’t notice that the car wasn’t even going in the right direction – not until it was taking a sharp turn right, off the main road, and onto the vacant plot of land, shielded from the road by a line of trees.

‘Excuse me, where are we going?’ You asked, looking around in confusion, finally paying attention.

‘I think we should take the quicker means of transportation, don’t you, Y/N?’ You saw a pair of oddly colored eyes in the mirror, and then the driver turned to face you.

‘J- Jongin?’ You gasped. ‘What’s wrong with your-’

‘It’s Kāi, darling,’ he chuckled, reaching for your arm.

Operating on instinct, you dodged his hand and attempted to open the door. It was locked.

‘Tsk. I thought we’d do it the nice way. Hyung asked me, after all,’ he tutted. ‘But I don’t think you’re willing to work with me here,’ he gritted that last part, suddenly pouncing at you through the space between the driver’s and passenger’s seats.

You screamed and struggled, and then…

It was a blur.

Like movie scenes, your surroundings were changing around you rapidly, too fast for you to catch anything. It may have lasted a split second, but made you so dizzy that you shut your eyes to battle it. When you finally opened them again, your vision was still foggy – the entire surroundings spinning. Kāi let go of your arm, allowing you to stumble forward and barely get a hold of a vertical surface before releasing the contents of your stomach onto the ground.

‘I told you to be gentle with her. She’s not used to teleporting.’ Unmistakably, it was Baëkhyun’s voice.

‘I brought her here in one piece. See arms or legs missing? No? That’s about as gentle as I get.’ The taller one rolled his eyes.

Baëkhyun approached you, a frown on his face, and helped get your hair out of your face despite your weak protests.

‘Let’s get you inside,’ he said, holding you up by the shoulders when your insides were finally done doing flips.

‘Don’t touch me,’ you coughed, pressing your side into the wall to get away from the physical contact.

‘Y/N, please. Just do as you’re told if you don’t want to be hurt.’ You looked up at him, angry at yourself for being this dumb, but also upset because your trust was again broken.

And even though you kept telling yourself that you and Baëkhyun only had ‘a casual thing’ going on, it did hurt. It hurt like a motherfucker, because you were used by a person you... fell in love with. You didn’t understand much of their plan yet, but something told you that it was all meant to hurt another person you loved.

Your feelings had always clouded your judgment. And now you’d gotten yourself into a completely lose-lose situation.

‘Don’t look at me like that,’ Baëkhyun pursed his lips. ‘You shouldn’t have tried to run away.’

‘Right. Bad little birdie for thinking of self-preservation and for once seeing someone for what he is,’ you mocked frustratedly.

‘I’m truly wondering how you restrain yourself from slapping her.’ You heard Kāi muse from behind Baëkhyun. ‘Maybe you should head in, and I’ll teach her how to cooperate, hyung.’

‘Let’s go,’ the blonde one grabbed your wrist and nodded to his crude green-haired companion. ‘Lead the way.’

You had no choice but to allow him to drag you into the building. Only then you noticed that it was somewhere you’d been before – the base previously utilized by Baekhyun and the boys. Before they abandoned it, of course. It looked different and foreign now, the hallways long and dark as you were taken to the bigger room with a round table, where the others were waiting.

At that point you saw their faces, struck by the similarities all of them bore to the squad you used to know. Your head was spinning again.

‘H- how? Who are you?’ You managed, taking in the unfamiliar variations of familiar faces.

‘So, I take it he didn’t educate her on the clones?’ Chanyeol, or at least someone who looked like him, sneered.

‘What clones? I thought-’

You were interrupted by Baëkhyun, who cleared his throat and announced.

‘She’s here, let’s begin.’

‘Don’t act like we’re not the ones who had to wait while you played with your target,’ someone scoffed from the farther side of the table.

‘Shut up, Chën.’ The silvery-white head shot a glare in his direction, eyes going from grayish blue to a darker shade. ‘Suhø,’ he turned to the red-haired man.

‘Well, well,’ he got up from his chair. ‘If it isn’t the Y/N. To be honest, you should thank Baëkhyun for having so much patience – our first idea was to kidnap and torture you for intel.’

Your eyes flicked back to Baëkhyun’s profile, but he didn’t spare you a glance.

‘Oh, I see you’re still looking for comfort in a familiar face. That’s not part of the plan. Baëkhyun, step out.’

The strategist’s head turned at the leader’s words.

‘What?’

‘Get out of the room. I don’t need her to think she has someone to count on here.’

‘But-’

‘I told you we’re not going to kill her, only use her.’ You swallowed, realizing your heart was beating somewhere in your throat at this announcement.

‘Suhø,’ he pressed again.

‘You shouldn’t be so fond of your little toy, you know,’ Chën piped up, cracking his knuckles theatrically.

‘Just lay a finger on her,’ Baëkhyun growled in response, rays of red light escaping from his now tight fists.

‘Yah, we don’t have time for your bullshit,’ Suhø interrupted their bickering. ‘The sooner you get out, the sooner we’re done with her.’

Baëkhyun pursed his lips and gave him a curt nod. Not meeting your despairing eyes, he left you in the room. Alone. With these monsters.

‘Fucking finally,’ Kāi clapped excitedly. ‘Let’s get this show on the road!’

‘Sit her down in that chair,’ someone said and you were pushed down forcefully.

The men started rearranging the room, moving laptops and phones and other stuff closer to you.

‘Hold her down, Sehūn,’ the leader ordered, then gave a nod to Chën.

You barely managed to sit still as he approached, even your knees shaking with panic.

‘What do you want from me?!’ You blurted.

‘Nothing much. We simply need your voice,’ Suhø shrugged and looked at another one of his accomplices. ‘Whenever you’re ready, Xiümin.’

Swallowing hard, you took in his words. You were the bait. To lure out the EXOs, perhaps? Or simply… Baekhyun?

Your heart faltered.

No, no, no. This was a trap, you should’ve known all along. Nevertheless, you allowed them to fool you, giving these men the leverage they needed. You weren’t going to make a sound! Anything to keep the boys away from trouble. Your mind was made up.

‘I have the line. But you have to catch his attention quickly, he’ll hang up fast if you don’t.’

‘No problem,’ the leader affirmed.

Xiümin nodded and used the keyboard to type something into a weird interface. Then turned the speaker on.

A ring sounded, then another one. You prayed that no answer would come, but after the third ring, the call was taken. For a long second, there was silence.

‘If you hang up, Y/N is going to die,’ Suhø began.

You blinked, feeling the angry tears form again, as you pursed your lips to keep your pitiful sobs in.

‘Talk,’ the speaker responded in what you realized was Minseok’s voice.

‘We have her now. At your old base. Come by sunrise if you want her alive,’ Suhø was concise in his demands. Minseok was silent for a few moments.

‘Why should we believe you? Let her talk if she’s there.’

Everyone turned to you, and you kept chewing on your lip.

‘You heard him.’ The leader referred to you, but you shook your head.

A brutal hand landed a slap across your face and then grabbed you by the hair.

‘Use your voice,’ it was Chën.

You only looked down at the greyish floor, not even blinking when you tasted blood.

‘Y/N, if you are really there, please say something,’ you jolted at the voice.

It was him. It was Baekhyun.

Breathing accelerating and heart racing, you couldn’t help the tears anymore. Wanting to scream and beg for him to come back for you, you kept shaking your head and refusing to make a sound.

‘I guess she’s not willing to make it easy on herself. Chën,’ Suhø tilted his head slightly, and you felt hands on you.

Sehūn had you in a headlock now, and Chën grabbed onto your arm with a cruel chuckle, jerking it so violently that you could not contain a wild yell. They let go of you, and you wailed, grabbing onto your numb lifeless limb in horror. You had never broken any bones, so you had no idea if he dislocated it, or fractured it, or worse. The pain was so immense that you couldn’t even register your name being called from the speaker.

‘By sunrise,’ Suhø reminded before they finished the call.

At that very moment, the door flew open.

‘What the fuck?!’ You heard Baëkhyun roar.

Red sparks fell around you as Chën was blasted away from you by a red ball of light.

His eyes were completely black, with red sparks – like those you witnessed attacking your abuser just now – floating angrily in there.

‘Stop this circus!’ Suhø raised his voice as Chën got up, something resembling little bolts of lightning appearing and disappearing around his forearms. ‘Stand down, the both of you. She was being stubborn, and we had to extract a reaction quickly. Your little human will be fine,’ he huffed, as if this was a normal course of action.

‘I’m taking her now,’ Baëkhyun answered firmly, stepping towards you.

‘Not so fast. She is to stay here until they arrive. As leverage.’ Suhø cleared his throat when their strategist wanted to protest. ‘You can keep watch over her yourself, in your room, or we can throw her in the dungeon downstairs and the boys will.’

‘She’ll stay with me,’ he gritted, helping you up gently not to disturb your hurting arm and walking you out of the room.

As soon as the door behind you slammed shut, he gathered you into his arms to carry you to the next destination. You didn’t try to resist, legs too wobbly to walk anyways, so you just cradled your arm and sniffled, at first not even noticing the room he took you in was quite familiar, as Baekhyun used to stay in it.

Baekhyun.

You sobbed, replaying his voice in your mind. The way he said your name, and how he pushed for you to let him know if you were there, if you were in danger… The stinging in your chest reignited because now he was going to walk right into this ambush because of you. Beginning to cry even harder, you forgot about your damaged arm, and the hurt, and the person who sat you down on the bed and kneeled in front of you.

‘It shouldn’t have been like this, Y/N. They wouldn’t have hurt you-’ He began, touching your hand.

‘Stop it!’ You slapped him in the face angrily. ‘You played with my feelings all this time, and now you’re just using me to hurt people I care about. Do you expect me to believe that you meant no harm? I hate you, Baëkhyun!’

‘I’m sorry,’ he muttered before raising his voice too. ‘But you shouldn’t have been stubborn! Why didn’t you just speak up?’

‘You really don’t understand?’ You asked in awe of his question. ‘You would if you ever loved anyone.’

‘So,’ he looked down at your lap, nudging his cheek with his tongue. ‘Is it Baekhyun? It’s because you still… love him?’

‘Why does it matter? I’m sure you guys, whoever you are, didn’t invite them here to have tea. What are you planning to do with them anyway? Is it about the Red?’

His eyes shot up to yours.

‘You know about the Red Force? He’s seriously dumb – telling you about them and leaving the clone part out!’

‘Yeah, and you’re so smart. Fooled a clueless girl with your great strategizing, well-fucking-done!’ Your words had plenty of bite, and Baëkhyun reacted.

‘Damn right! The only thing I didn’t do well to keep you safe is leaving your stubborn ass in the room with my crew, and it’s still so much better than the initial plan the Red had for you! I’ve kept you alive this long, haven’t I?’ He snapped at you, and you scoffed.

‘The only thing you didn’t- My arm was nearly ripped off, and it hurts like a motherfucker!’

‘Oh, does it now?’ He mocked, and you noticed how his fingers pressed onto certain spots of your arm, easing the pain significantly. ‘Chën could’ve done so much worse to you, Y/N. But this time he just used his knowledge of pressure points responsible for acute pain. And some of his power to shock you through them.’

He removed his fingers and you felt the pain subside, becoming almost irrelevant and foggy.

‘What- So it’s fine? My arm is fine?’ You asked, rubbing it in shock.

‘You’re fine,’ he breathed out, looking away.

For a while, you just sat like that, in complete silence.

‘Baëkhyun,’ you called, voice hoarse from all the crying. ‘Are you- going to kill them?’

He sucked his lower lip into his mouth, thinking your question over.

‘I don’t know. The plan is to capture and hand them over to the Red. There’s no telling what they’ll do to them this time.’

‘Shit,’ you swore, hiding your face in your palms. ‘This is all my fault.’

‘It isn’t. We were on their tail for a while, you just became our bargaining chip.’

Huffing, you hit the mattress with an open palm in a fit of annoyance.

‘Had I not trusted you so stupidly, this wouldn’t have happened!’

‘Oh, birdie,’ he tilted his head to the side, as if talking to a capricious child. ‘The way we met… sparked my interest. And when it was discovered that you used to be… his girlfriend,’ he paused. ‘Suhø wasn’t kidding – the Red suggested that we torture you. But I came up with a different plan, because I-,’ he looked away as if he struggled to continue. ‘I didn’t want them to hurt you.’

The way he stuttered drew your attention. But you weren’t willing to let him in again. Not about to make the same mistake twice. Instead, you kept questioning him.

‘Did you find ways to contact them through me, too?’

Baëkhyun nodded, and you gave him an expectant look. He sighed and elaborated.

‘The strawberry necklace. You told me it was from someone important to you, so I assumed it was Baekhyun, especially since he likes the damn thing. Checked it out when you were asleep because I know what I would’ve done.’

You were still confused as to what he meant.

‘He was tracking you live, so we managed to hack into it and trace the line back to a burner phone. We could not access the location without establishing a direct connection, but we got the number.’

‘I just gave you this one,’ you chuckled bitterly, and his blue eyes dropped to your knees again. ‘And now we’re freaking doomed.’

He shook his head to this. ‘I don’t know what will happen tomorrow, but I promise I’ll keep you safe.’

‘You think that’s what I want?! When the person I love gets murdered or worse, all thanks to-’

‘Stop saying that!’ He raised his voice again, hitting the mattress with a fist, red sparks flying everywhere without hurting you. ‘Why do you love him all that much? Didn’t he leave you?’

‘He’s walking into a trap to save me. And he’s a strategist like you, he clearly knows the odds. Are you really asking me why?’

Baëkhyun stared at you, chest heaving, and nostrils flared. It seemed like he wanted to argue, tell you that you were wrong. But instead, he looked away. His voice sounded hollow when he spoke again, eyes a dim shade of blue.

‘Get some rest. Tomorrow’s gonna be a tough day.’

Lying in bed wide awake most of the night, you prayed for a miracle that would somehow save your EXO boys.

>> Chapter 4 [fin]

A/N: Meet X-EXO ✨ So... What do you think of Baёk at this point? Is he a bad guy or worse? Is Y/N going to make it? Just one chapter left, we’re almost there!! Let’s hope that EXO show up on time yes I'm evil

#baekhyun smut #byun baekhyun smut #exowritersnet #baekhyun x reader #baekhyun x you #icequeenbae fics #Desert Flower #exo smut #baekhyun #x exo #baekbaёk #baekhyun scenario

113 notes · View notes

dreamii-yume · 4 years ago

Text

New Episode Update Let’s GOO!!!

Warning : This is just Yume having a mental breakdown, seriously. This episode update was WHACK.

~ MAJOR SPOILERS FOR 68-75 ~

I know we ain’t participating and all but the game reminding you that there’s 10 minutes left to prepare is seriously bad for my heart.

Aah, shiet. Vil is still hurt.

He still has small wounds and scratches that he hid make up. Daddy, I’m worried.

Apparently, yeah, I’m not the only one cause my homeboy, Epel just asked to switch the center role with Vil. THE CONFIDENCE.

Aw, he’s worried about him falling over during stage (And make the performance look bad) Come on, Epel just be honest-

...He finally became the ideal poisoned apple that Vil wanted, huh?

Vil being proud a mom.

But the queen inside him is STRONG.

He’ll embrace the villain in him, OUR QUEEN CAN STILL GO. INJURED, WHO?

...AAND he proceeds to roast Epel again lol Typical Vil.

I love how Epel just accepted a nickname like “Doku Ringo-chan” lol It’s so cute, senior-junior relationship goals right there.

HERE WE GO.

Everyone is actually really confident hahaha

I really wish Deuce’s mom, Ace’s brother, Jamil’s sister, and Vil’s dad were here in person to watch.

HECK I WANT KALIM’S WHOLE FAMILY HERE WHY NOT

T-THEY’RE REALLY LETTING US HEAR THE FULL SONG.

IS THAT JAMIL RAPPING.

Look at Jamil’s solo SD dancing. LOOK AT IT.

I really fucking love Vil’s singing voice aaa

HIS VOICE IS SO GOOD.

Album when disney.

Is Vil okay.

...aight im hearing some high quality panting here

...dont mind me listening to it a bit too much...

...they’re going to be great reference for some spicy- leave me alone

Vil panting is making me feel SOMETHING.

ANYWAY. THE CROWD IS A MOOD.

IS VIL OKAY.

Unmei no megami is giving me idia ptsd here.

Heartslabyul Senpais are watching their kids, looking all proud *sniff

Oh god, after playing Obey Me, it just occurred to me how similar Cater and Asmodeus’ voices are...

Watch these Senpai dorks act like Ace and Deuce’s second family. Trey being the dad, Riddle being the mom, and Cater being the supportive big bro. It’s so beautiful.

Riddle’s voice is a lot more softer now, I just realized...It’s so soothing...

God i miss u too octavinelle never change

Yeah, why tf did Floyd not audition for this

Bro, can you imagine Nobuhiko Okamoto in the squad as well??? IMAGINE-

Of course, he wasn’t in the mood back then. Of course. Why did i even ask.

IMAGINE FLOYD BEING IN VDC NEXT YEAR.

Omg i miss u too octavinelle never change

Azul’s gonna overblot again with Floyd’s marketing skills lol

Jade coming in like welp i guess thats that. Too bad, huh Azul?

GOD i miss u too octavinelle never change

SAVANA BITCHES HI

I wonder if these mfs knew that Vil just overblotted and malmal was the one who fixed the stage lol

oooh Leona’s sus about something he a sharp boi

Speak up my guy—

still so weird leona taking his job seriously

Malleus looking happier seeing this performance rather than Lilia’s lol

I miss the simpery in Sebek

Silver’s not in the verge of falling into a coma for once wow

Chenya’s so cute.

AND WE’RE BACK TO CUTE HEIGH HO TEAM

fcking shotacons man...im not one to talk

Aw, they didn’t show Neige performance...

The simping in the crowd is a MASSIVE mood.

WHO WINS TELL ME

These night raven fuckers better vote for us and not pull a “oh shie my hand slipped lololol” i swear to god- im gonna throw hands

*me holding my phone and pretending to vote as well

Suspense music intensifies be like-

HAAA

BOIS, ITS ONE VOTE DIFFERENCE WHO IS IT AAAA

WHAT.

HOW DARE- HOW!? HOW DID WE LOSE!?

WE LOST BY ONE VOTE!?

EVERYONE’S SO SHOCKED LOL

vil pls dont overblot again-

Noooo grim’s tuna cans-

WE REALLY LOST TO A LEGIT KIDS SONG.

These children do not have the right to be this cute. I wanna take Timmy, Toby, and Shelpie home.

I swear to god one of these dwarves sounds like Cheka lol Is it Toby?

EPEEELLLL DONT CRRYYYY

KALIMMMM DONT CRRYYYY

KALIM HAVING THE AUDACITY TO SOUNDING LIKE A BIG BROTHER AND THEN CRYING HIS OWN RIGHT AFTER LOLOLOL

I HATE THIS EPISODE YALL MADE MY TWO BOIS CRY IM FIGHTING THIS EPISODE. BURN THIS.

This background music too though im deeeeddd

KALIM IM SO SORRY FOR MAKING A SINFIC ABOUT YOU PLS DONT CRY-

Jamil impressed about Vil being “calm” and Vil just going “h e h. you dont even know.”

....ha...

Monsieur Rook. WHAT did you say.

ROOK VOTED FOR ROYAL SWORD. Are you kidding me. You snek how could you- i loved you

WHAT DID I SAY- Ya’ll night raven fuckers shall not slip by their fingers when voting rook.

Vil is in the brink of passing out aaaaa

I have never heard Ace this pissed before whoa- lol he sounds like Deuce in his delinquent mode

Aw...Rook felt that Neige’s performance carries a stronger bond than theirs :’( it’s hard to put the blame on him when he’s saying all these stuff

It’s just like what they said in the past episodes that it’s really hard voting for your own team when you know the opposing team is better.

Aww...He just wanted Vil to believe in himself more...Rook is such a best man. Im crying-

Oh noooo is Vil gonna cry too nooo- daddy turned to baby really quick SOMEONE GIVE HIM AN EMERGENCY HUG

Well- at least...at least the 100 year record of not being able to win is still going, yeah? Um...bad joke? Sorry, i’ll see myself out-

NEIGE NOT NOW AND YOUR VII-KUN BULLSHIT- we’re having a moment here

Neige is such sweetheart but aaaahh— This makes it worse, we can’t even hate him aaa—

OMG JUST WHEN I THOUGHT THINGS COULDN’T- AAAAA

MONSIEUR ROOK. YOU’RE A FAN OF NEIGE!?

MOTHERFUCKER just got exposed by Neige himself lol

Going to Neige’s shake hand events, sending him letters, buying all his merch and shie- HE’S A FULL BLOWN NEIGE STAN

WTF YOU SNEK GET OUT OF THIS SCHOOL-

OOOOHHH THAT FUCKING ALBUM- HIS “LIFE’S WORK” or whatever bullshit IS FULL OF NEIGE

...actually- my japanese is lacking- im not sure lol what is a ブロマイド??? Lol I feel like a clown.

Rook is sweating profusely LOL

...what do you have to say for yourself, monsieur rook.

Wait- huh is that-

IS HE GONNA CRY-

WHY IS EVERYONE CRYING!??!?!?!

HE’S SILENTLY CRYING AS HE INTRODUCED HIMSELF TO NEIGE WHAT. THE. FUCK IS THIS EPISODE.

Neige fanclub??? Eternal Snow??? What kind of creepy-ass- OH, HE EVEN HAS A MEMBERSHIP NUMBER TOO-

Props to Neige with his :) expression unfaltering.

I’m- I’m speechless.

Vil is just looking down at Rook in disappointment like- “you’re more pathetic than I am”

Queen just went “I think you need this handkerchief more than I do now” THAT’S RIGHT. REPENT MOTHERFUCKER.

Rook crying is cursed.

But damn, I’m kinda liking this new relationship this bitchy relationship they have

Neige just dragged everyone’s ass back on stage and his snow white energy just said “LETS ALL BE FRIENDS AND SING”

NEIGE IS FUCKING GREAT- HE REALLY DID GOT THESE BITCHES TO SING HEIGH HO LOL

ACE’S RELUCTANT SINGING AND DEUCE LOOKING LIKE HE’S HAVING FUN

KALIM IS SUCH A MOOD, SINGING EVEN WITHOUT KNOWING THE LYRICS AND JAMIL JUST HAVING THAT “i want to die” ENERGY

AIGHT. ROOK IS HAVING WAY TOO MUCH FUN AND EPEL IS TRYING HIS BEST. HE’S SO CUTE-

OMG NEIGE AND VIL HAVING SUCH GOOD HARMONY—

YAHOO Y A H O O TANOSHIINDA~~

YA’LL SURE ABOUT GIVING ME THIS BLESSED MOMENT??

What a somewhat happy ending, even though Rook just backstabbed us I’m crying Beauté 100 points!!!

LOL Vil realizing he’s having fun singing with Neige- “SOMEONE JUST END ME RIGHT NOW-“ The desperation in his voice-

I love how Neige’s yahoo yahoo is messing with everyone’s head, even Vil wants to pass out lol

haha Crowley is so depressed lol

WHA- WHO-

HEADMASTER OF ROYAL SWORD!?

He looks like your typical grandpa- and his outfit looks like that one mickey mouse wizard outfit but blue—

Old man just went “we won lol” just to piss Crowley off I like this guy’s energy already-

Crowley being most likely as old as this guy—

ooohh this man just sensed something in this stage- Leona did too, didn’t he???

* Damn. Crowley talking so fast sounds like he’s making a load of bullshit lol

Anyway, I’m just glad that it’s not mickey mouse who’s the headmaster— I would’ve lost my shit.

We’re back in our dorms and I forgot that the squad doesn’t live with us anymore. It’s suddenly so lonely now...

Grim is getting the yahoo yahoo ptsd too lol it’s too goddamn catchy

oooohh shiet- mickey is calling us again

YES we finally got a good picture of this motherfucker

It seems like nothing is disrupting our communication this time, so MC thought to call Grim but—

Grim is not here.

Uuhhh...Grim? Where you’ve gone??? We’re getting flashbacks of the first parts of the game.

We went out to find Grim and HE’S CHOMPING ON ANOTHER BLACK STONE ON THE STAGE-

GRIM SPIT THAT OUT YOU LOOK TERRIFYING

AAAAAHH GRIM HAS GONE FERAL— He’s attacking US

Is this because we didn’t win his tuna canss nooo

NoOO SWEET BABY COME BACK.

Legit I’m sad, please baby don’t overblot like this...

He learned a new move though- SCRATCH

Ooh— We’re seeing some Ignihyde scenes here~

P U H I H I

Idia getting a lot of emails from bigshot companies whoa—

THAT OLYMPUS—?! EXCUSE ME??? Ortho what- Are we finally getting that Hercules episode—

Damn getting a hot chance in olympus only to put them down the recycling bin oof— Idia why edit : Yume was informed that olympus is kind of a company that sponsored VDC sorry she was mind-fucked at this moment and the ability to understand proper Japanese just went whoosh lol Thanks to @starshiningsirius for pointing it out for Yume~ ♥︎ HONESTLY YUME’S JUST GONNA WAIT FOR ACTUAL PROFESSIONAL TRANSLATORS AT THIS POINT LOL Don’t trust me for important situation too much lol

Aaaahh...We’re getting this shut-in out of his room in the next episode, are we?

And that concludes the whole Pomefiore Episode! JESUS CHRIST 75 CHAPTERS ALL IN ALL!? How long is the Ignihyde chapter going to be, huh!?

This was a really, really fun episode lol I’d consider this a fan service episode actually cause of all the things we get to experience— The singing, dancing, and the new songs, THE DRAMA. (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

But then, the plot thickens, no? What’s going to happen to Grim? In the Ignihyde episode? And those reoccurring memories of us? And our relationship with Tsunotarou lol ALSO WE NEVER REALLY DID FIND OUT WHAT ROOK’S UNIQUE MAGIC IS. DISNEY EXPLAIN—

Thanks for reading this shitpost of Yume losing her shiet lol See you all in the Ignihyde Episode~ ❤

#twisted wonderland #spoilers #episode 5 #Talk with Yume

143 notes · View notes

king-paimon · 4 years ago

Text

HnK Post Chapter 95 Thoughts: 3 Months later...

Hi guys…. I’m so sorry for being away for so long and delaying this post. I can’t believe March is already almost over. This year is going by way too quickly, but honestly, is that really a surprise? I was working on this post back in January and was planning on posting it then, but life has been more busy than usual for me. I still feel really bad for promising to post this and not being able to keep it. But here it is now! I don’t know how many people will see it since the Houseki no Kuni tags have been pretty quiet, but you know what? I’m kind of glad I didn’t post this post right away because I wanted to properly talk about my feeling about the chapter, the series, and Ms. Haruko Ichikawa herself, and doing that when I was still emotionally charged wouldn’t have done this post justice. And though I don’t think my thoughts overall has changed too much, I’d still like to share my thoughts, if you are interested in hearing them.

This will be another really, really long post, so be prepared! I’m definitely going to be doing a lot of edits on this one so please bare with me if anything doesn’t make sense. Please let me know if anything I said is too confusing.

Anywhoo~ here it goes:

My view of the story at this point

I had to go over my last post to see if any of my original opinions had changed and, well, for the most part, not too much. Most of the gripes I have with the story is still about the same, particularly the remaining gems becoming lunarian and the many implications that comes with it, though I would say some of my anger has subsided. I’m still bothered by it, though. I understand why the story would go in this direction and why the characters, especially Euclase, would choose to make this drastic decision to change themselves, since that was they ultimately wanted: to no longer live in fear of being destroyed and live peacefully, even if it means changing what they all were. It’s still bothers me a lot, mainly because I can relate this to similar real life events of people erasing their cultural and even racial identity as a means of survival in a different and so-called “better” society. I remember in one of my very first posts in the fandom, I stated how uncomfortable it made me that the first moon gems were totally fine assimilating into Moon society and were wanting to completely change themselves to fit in this society, even if it meant removing what made them who they were. For characters who didn’t like their original identity like Cairngorm (or Welegato but I’m not calling them that), or felt stunted in their original society like Dia, and found solace in Moon society, I can see how this transition as a liberating thing…but only to an extent. The thought of literally going to the extremes of changing yourself inside and out, erasing all traces of what made you “you”, while also destroying all old meaningful relationships in the process, to live in a place you were conditioned to be believe is the better option for you…It hits a little too close to home.

I’m talking about cultural assimilation and cultural destruction, where racial and cultural minorities sometimes go through drastic measures in order to assimilate into the “better” society, even if it means completely erasing their original identities physically and mentally. I’m not saying all forms of assimilation is inherently bad and I’m not saying that you must stick with your cultural upbringing for it’s a part of your identity; that is a toxic view and it’s especially bad if you experienced terrible things because of that upbringing. I’m trying to talk about the extreme cases of assimilation when these individuals are essentially convinced to go through extreme measures to fit in to the “better” society because their old identity was “bad”, and by completely changing themselves, from their appearance to even their name, then they can finally be happy in the so-called “better” society. I’ve heard of people going through such lengths and it’s heartbreaking. It’s very cultish and that’s how I viewed the transition of the gems becoming Lunarians, with everyone accepting the change with seemingly no issue and especially after Aechmea literally gave Cairngorm that new name. It would have been one thing if Cairn picked that name themselves, but it was all Aechmea. The lustrous don’t exist anymore and everyone is ok with it. The gem society that we knew, at this point of time, is gone now. It was far from perfect but the fact that it’s gone is sad and disturbing to me.

My view of the key characters of the chapter

Now that I stated how I feel about the gems essentially being erased, the next question is how do I feel about these characters themselves?

Conflicted. Very, very conflicted, and even a bit disappointed and upset, especially with certain characters more than others. But surprisingly, even after seeing how the turn of events turned out for all of them while Phos is stuck on Earth alone… I don’t hate them. Yeah. After everything that has happened, I currently don’t hate the gems… For now, anyways. It all depends on what happens next.

But the one character that I feel the most conflicted with is Adamant, especially after his interaction with Aechmea. Part of me is confused by Adamant’s and Aechmea’s seemingly friendly interaction because of Adamant’s past actions and words, for they don’t seem to belong to someone who would be on friendly terms with someone who they were actively resisting against before. I’m talking about all of the times that Adamant would fight off the Lunarians but also that moment in Chapter 85:

(Chapter 85, Pages 10-11)

After seeing things like this, I just find it odd how Adamant’s interactions with Aechmea are so friendly now. And with the horrifying implication that everything that had happened was planned between them, which also doesn’t make sense, I’m not sure what to think. Maybe Adamant’s changed attitude relates to him being free of his burdens and physical body? This could explain the change in attitude, but it still feels… off. Maybe I’m looking too much into this. I don’t want to hold hope that when he and the other gems were transformed that Aechmea somehow manipulated their memories to make them more compliant, even though it was made clear that memories were going to be lost in the process. Maybe this will be explained more in the next chapter, but I won’t hold my breath for that either. To me, this just made me feel weird about Adamant because remember, I was both sad and relieved when he disintegrated in the previous chapter because I really liked his character. Now though, I’m not so sure. I still don’t hate him or any of the other gems, but I’m definitely on the fence with him more so than the others. I certainly don’t hate Euclase like many other fans; I didn’t agree with their past actions (or rather lack of actions), but like with Phos and other characters, they did what they felt was right given what they knew. Still not excusing it, but I understand why. As for Antarcticite... I’m not sure, honestly. Though I’m glad at least they brought up Phos, I can’t help but feel that their main priority is still Adamant. Out of recently changed characters, Antarcticite is the main character I have the most positive opinion on, but again, that can easily change within the next chapter.

So yeah, I still have mixed feeling about all that has happened that led to this point in the story, and I do have a more negative view of some of them. But regardless of that, I can’t bring myself to downright hate any of the characters. Disappointed with their decisions is one thing, but to hate them with every fiber of my being? No. I don’t think I can. At least for now. The same goes to the Lunarians, too. Hell, even though I’ve said before that I hated Aechmea for how he manipulated Phos and the other gems for personal gain, once again, I don’t think I downright hate him either (though I still want something bad to happen to him.) Aechmea is such an intriguing antagonist that I love to despise.

My view of Haruko Ichikawa at this point

Since the release of chapter 95, I’ve seen a lot of fans post their criticisms of Haruko Ichikawa herself regarding how she’s writing the story and her treatment of the characters. Someone even commented on my chapter post about how they don’t view her story as ‘amazing’ anymore because of her cruel treatment of Phos and the depressing turns in the story. Even popular commentors like @rinboz posted their criticism about what Ms. Ichikawa is doing with her story. As for me, I can agree with some of the comments made to an extent. Some of the choices Ms. Ichikawa made in the story has had me question her a few times; like the mentioned interaction between Aechmea and Adamant as well as the extremely predatorial relationship between Achmea and Cairngorm. I still think that chapter 95 was extremely rushed, especially going through the previous events that were stretched out into nearly 10 chapters. There are many other smaller issues that I personally have when it comes to how Ms. Ichikawa writes her story and characters, but I think the biggest criticism I’ve seen that I agree with is the concern about the current direction of the story. And at this point, the story can only go in so many directions and most of them are leading to anything but a genuinely happy ending for Phos. And it’s pretty depressing that Ms. Ichikawa has some of us pleading for Phos to die so they don’t suffer anymore. I can’t think of any other story that has me wanting the main character to die, not because I hate, but because I don’t want them to be mistreated anymore. This story is nothing but hopelessness.

But you know what’s crazy? I kind of like that.

Maybe Ms. Ichikawa has made me a glutton for tragic stories, or because I’ve been starving for a unique story, but I kind of like that this story hasn’t gone in the predictable, happy route for everything Phos has gone through. If this story were written by someone else, I can picture Phos somehow regaining their appearance and memories, be surrounded by the people who truly cared about them and their enemies dead, and pretty much having the picture-perfect happy ending with no form of problems whatsoever as an award for everything that Phos previously sacrificed. Yeah, this is the ending I’m sure fans want in some shape or form and to a degree, I do too. But to be honest, I’m kind of glad that’s not the story that we’re getting, at least right now. In a weird way, it’s sort of refreshing to have a main character who doesn’t always win in the end, especially after all of the things the character sacrificed.

And I also how the story and it’s characters can be so simple and complexed at the same time, like in her anthology series. To me, this makes Ms. Ichikawa stand out from the many mangaka I’ve followed throughout the years. And because of that, part of me hopes she knows what she’s doing and has something extreme planned for the story’s future.

Now, I don’t want to shoot myself in the foot for still thinking highly of Ms. Ichikawa’s writing; there are still things that I think could have been handled differently, like the mentioned pacing and story details. But for now, those gripes are not too irritating for me and I’m not quite ready to downright say that her story is bad...YET. I want to reserve my final opinion of Ms. Ichikawa as a writer until the end of the series, whenever that will be, because despite how the story has progressed for last several chapters, I’m still enjoying writing. I just hope that when the series does come to an end that Ms. Ichikawa gives us a satisfying end. When it comes to ending a series, how an author does so can really affect how fans view the series and the author, and I think this will be the case for this story, though I’m sure there will be criticism regardless of what kind of end Ms. Ichikawa creates. For me, while I do care about whether Phos and the other characters get the endings they deserve, I just hope it will be told well. I’ve seen too many times really good series ending terribly because the creator didn’t know how to end a series properly. I sincerely hope that won’t be the case with Ms. Ichikawa.

From this point forward

I remember seeing a lot of readers who are upset with how the story has progressed thus far, with some even saying that they were going to drop the series because of how depressing it is. I think everyone who felt this way has every right to feel that way; it’s completely understandable. Houseki no Kuni is definitely not a story for everyone, and it can take an emotional toll on you. I know it certainly affected me that way, and I can’t think of many other series that has done that. It’s been a long since I’ve been so invested in a series and despite the many emotional rollercoasters I’ve felt during parts of the story, I don’t think I will ever say that I regret picking this series up. And despite my mixed feeling about the latest chapter, I want to continue to stick with it. Even if the story continues to spiral in a never-ending pit of despair, I still want to stick with it until it ends. And you know, I think even if this series does have a somber, heartbreaking ending, I think I’d still view the story as overall amazing and I’d still be glad I got into it when I did...Unless Ms. Ichikawa gives us an abrupt, unsatisfying ending. Then that opinion goes out the window.

Until the next chapter comes out...

Other than being busy, I admit that I’m glad to be taking a break from Houseki no Kuni. Despite my many praises, it still takes a lot out of me and I definitely needed that break. And though I personally don’t mind waiting a bit longer, I can’t wait for it to back. I sincerely hope that Ms. Ichikawa doing alright, especially after all of the chaos happening for the past year, and that she enjoys her time away from the series. I hope she’s staying healthy in body and mind, and I’ll wait with bated breath for the next chapter of this story.

Besides this post, I actually had a few post ideas that I want to work on, but because of my schedule, those will have to wait a while. I wanted to make another story prediction post because even though they are sometimes wrong, they are fun to do. I think I’ll wait until the next chapter to come out to make that one. The other post I’ve been somewhat working on is a bit different from my usual post; it’s somewhat of a character analysis/reflection and it’s on a controversial character that while many justifiably hate, I personally can’t. (Can you guess who that is? I’m sure you can!) Because of how many people hate this character, I was not sure if I wanted to write it. But you know what, I’m going to do it anyways. When that post will be done? I have no clue, but this will be an interesting writing exercise for me and I can’t wait share why I don’t hate this character the way many other fans do.

The end!

Well, that’s the end of this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I will likely go over this again at some point but it’s getting really late and I need to get some sleep. I hope everyone is doing well and keeping themselves busy during this series hiatus. Maybe unwind by reading/watching a new series. There are some interesting ones that came out last year and this year. I personally stated watching Wonder Egg Priority. It’s really good but deals with a lot of heavy subject matters, so be warned. I’vve also watched lighter stuff like Lupin the Third (I love this franchise so much) and some of the new shows on Netflix. I would like to see some more stuff but I don’t know what to look for. If you have any recommendations, please feel free to leave a comment.

Until next time, I hope everyone has a pleasant week 😊

#houseki no kuni #land of the lustrous #hnk spoilers #lotl spoilers #hnk #lotl #hnk thoughts #hnk phosphophyllite #hnk chapter 95 #hnk adamant #hnk aechmea #haruko ichikawa #long post #personal opinion #personal thoughts #hnk phos #hnk meta #hnk manga spoilers #hnk spoiler

64 notes · View notes

babymetaldoll · 4 years ago

Text

Danger Days - Chapter seven: "This mess we are in"

Word count: 12,7K

Summary: Matthew is worried after the incident Joey had with a fan. The drummer gets drunk celebrating Frank's birthday. In fact, everybody but Gerard is drunk, and they end up in a strip club. Joey makes a few bad decisions she regrets in the morning.

Warnings: Alcohol consumption, bad decisions. Cursing.

A/N: Missing Gubler? don't worry, he'll be very present in the next chapter. Meanwhile, read how these kids keep making a mess they are gonna regret pretty soon.

Also, all of this is fiction and the gif ain't mine. Love you!

Masterlist

- "We are not going out!"- Ray was emphatic and looked like an angry father as he stood in front of Joey, who kept frowning, very upset.

- "But Ray!!"- the drummer whined- "It's gonna be Frank's birthday!! We have to party!!"

- "No!"

Toro was serious. He stood in the middle of Joey's room, arm-crossed on his chest. She was dressed and ready to go, pouting.

- "Joey, there is no way I'm letting you leave the hotel in this country ever again!"

- "The country has nothing to do with what happened!"- there was a knock on the door, and she walked over to answer- "You already posted against the attack, Gerard made a speech, nothing is gonna happen to me!"

- "Hello Bug!!"- Frank walked in with Mikey and Gerard- "I heard you were ready to party!"- Ray sighed and covered his face with both hands.

- "Finally! my people are here!!"- Joey shouted, excited.

- "Yeah!! We brought pizza, beer, and video games. Let's do this!!"- Frank said, and Joey knit her brows immediately.

- "You have to be kidding me!"

- "Nope! It's gonna be my fucking party, and we are doing the fuck I want to do"- Frank said, smiling.

- "Fuck..."- Joey sighed and sat on her bed- "I got all pretty for nothing."

- "Not true. You are gonna look as hot as fuck in all the pictures we are gonna post of this lovely evening"- Iero chuckled at his own words.

- "Don't you fucking dare posting anything!"

Ray started the preach the minute Joey's cell phone rang, and the girl locked herself in the bathroom to have some privacy.

- "Akumu, I miss you"- she whispered and sat in the bathtub and stared at her boyfriend's face on the cell phone screen.

- "How are you? What the fuck happened?"- and he looked honestly worried and upset.

- "What?"

- "What the fuck happened today?? Why didn't you tell me a fan smashed a bottle against your head?!"- the drummer sighed and closed her eyes

- "'Cos I didn't want you to get worried."

- "Well, too bad 'cos I found out on Twitter, and I am fucking worried!"- Joey sighed, staring at him, and pouted- "Don't give me that all innocent look 'cos I am mad! How couldn't you fucking tell me, Joey?! This is serious!"

- "I am ok, Akumu. Nothing bad happened."

- "This is all Frank's fault!!"- Matthew was honestly upset. He kept walking around the set, hitting walls. and making his best not to yell at his girlfriend- "I wanna break that fucker's face!"

- "Please don't say that. He was just trying to help,"- Joey whispered but didn't have another excuse for her friend.

- "Well, he is an asshole..."- Gubler looked at Joey on the screen and sighed- "What if something worse would have happened?"

- "But it didn't"

- "Joey, I mean it, what if something awful happened to you on tour and I am not there with you..."- he paused 'cos a knot in his throat didn't let him say another word.

- "Matthew... I am ok, I am going to be ok. It was just a psycho fan. There are bodyguards around us the whole time. I am not walking around alone. And most important of all, I am not going to hide just 'cos a few teenagers hate me for touring with this band."

- "Joey, please don't be the tough girl I know you are this time. This is serious."

She sighed and stared at Matthew. Sometimes Joey felt he was more sensitive than she was. He wasn't afraid to feel, and she was scared to feel weak.

Joey's cell beeped as she and her boyfriend kept staring at each other in silence, both of them feeling like shit for being apart.

- "What is it?"

- "Mom is calling... I bet she knows too."

- "Call me later?"

- "Ok..."

- "I love you, Yami. I don't want anything bad ever to happen to you."

- "I love you too, Akumu... I'll call you in a few minutes, ok?"

- "Are you ok?"- Gerard asked his brother as he watched him drink a can of beer in less than two minutes.

- "Yeah, why?"

- "'Cos you look sad? Weird? Depressed?"

- "No, I'm ok. Have you talked to Lynz?"

- "Yeah, earlier today"

- "How is she?"

- "Good, she has a lot of work, but that's good 'cos she is busy"- Gerard didn't get why his brother was asking so much about his wife- "Are you sure you..."

- "Yeah, dude! I'm ok! I'm fine"- Mikey looked around and frowned- "Where's Bug?"

- "In the bathroom talking with Gubler"- Frank said as he walked to the door, and James walked in with more booze- "Yeah! Party time! excellent"

Iero was excited. A big part of him wanted to be back home with his wife and kids, but after the shitty day they had had, he felt like he could use a chill party with his friends to ease his mind from the deep guilt he was feeling.

Frank felt like the shit, to be honest. Before and after the show, he locked in his room alone and basically cursed himself for being such an asshole. He stared at the picture he took with Joey for a long time and felt he had been too selfish. He got carried away by the moment and his urges to kiss her, and everything ended up being a fucking disaster. The worst part of the whole mess: he fucking loved the picture. He would frame it if he could.

- "Iceland!"- Iero sort of yelled and hugged Joey as soon as she walked out the bathroom, making her chuckle surprised.

- "Jersey! are you drunk already?"

- "No, I'm just happy to see you! Now let's get drunk!"- the girl smiled and nodded- "Everything ok?"

- "Yeah, I was just talking with Matthew and my mom, and then with Matthew again. They saw the whole deal on the internet and were pretty scared... and Gubler hates you now"- Frank fake smiled at that, praying Joey didn't notice- "I'm just kidding!"- she quickly added and hugged Frank for a second- "He is just worried sick about everything."

- "We are all worried, but nothing bad will happen to you again"- Iero smiled, and Joey nodded, walking away from him.

To be honest, Frank didn't give a shit if Matthew hated him. He wasn't a fan of the actor either at that point. He followed Joey with his eyes across the room until he found Gerard looking at him with a frown. Iero smiled and nodded. Gerard did the same.

It wasn't even midnight yet, and Mikey was drunk. Seriously drunk. He sat next to Joey on the floor and rested his head on her shoulder.

- "Are you ready to sleep?"- she whispered and moved her head on his.

- "Nope."

- "Are you gonna puke?"

- "Not yet."

- "I always forget you are the most functional intoxicated person I have ever met,"- and Mikey chuckled.

- "I love you, Bug,"- the girl smiled and sighed. It made her happy to know she had a friend on him.

- "Thank you, bróðir, I love you too. I'm glad I met you"- she made a pause and turned to him- "But if you puke on me, I'll kill you"- and Mikey burst out laughing.

- "Got it."

- "Joey, you are up!"- Frank said and handed her the joystick- "Dude, come on! You can't be that drunk just yet! I'm still halfway there!"

- "Then you should catch up!"- Mikey answered with barely opened eyes.

- "It's on bitch!"- Frank laughed and walked to grab another beer. Joey chuckled and walked closer to the tv, to bump into her opponent: Gerard.

- "Hey"- she smiled and sat next to him- "What are we playing now?"

- "Mario Kart."

- "Ok, ready to lose?"

- "I don't know, are you?"- Joey turned to him and found his eyes on her, making her heart skip a beat.

- "Eat dirty, Gerard Way"- she answered and pressed start.

Gerard was chuckling nonstop as Joey groaned, frustrated. He was winning, and she hated it. Although, she knew she was having a good time. The rest of the guys were talking and drinking, so no one really paid attention to them.

- "And suck it!!"- he shouted, winning another race.

- "No way, José! You are fucking cheating!"- Joey argued immediately- "I want revenge! I need revenge!!"

- "Fine by me"- the singer smiled and watched how the girl started another race.

- "Hey, Gerard"- she said after a few minutes of playing.

- "Yeah?"

- "This is the first time we do something together in days... actually, this is the first time you talk to me in days... is everything ok?"

- "Yeah, why?"

Gerard pretended to be surprised. He was thankful they had to be looking at the screen, 'cos it kept him from staring at her eyes and melt. Joey was thinking the very same thing.

- "After the day you found me crying, you basically ignored me."

- "I didn't! I've been tired, that's all."

- "Is that it?"

- "Yes, of course. "Liar liar pants on fire."

- "Good,"- Joey made a pause and just spit out- "I thought maybe you were mad or uncomfortable with me after that nap."

- "No! of course not!"

Gerard was blushing and his deepest desire at that moment was to run away from that conversation. He felt like he had to lie about every single thing he had to tell that woman.

- "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

- "You didn't"

- "And if..."- Gerard paused the game and turned to her. He even sighed as his eyes locked in hers.

- "Joey, it's not a problem. I really enjoyed our time together that night, it was very special to me"- and suddenly he realized he wasn't lying, and it was a mistake- "I mean, we didn't start with the right foot and the fact we were able to talk and have a moment together made me very happy 'cos... it meant we were... leaving all that bullshit behind."

Joey nodded and sighed. They kept staring at each other, and Gerard had to literally fight the instinct of leaning over to kiss her. Until it got weird.

- "Can you please unpause the game so I can fucking kick your lousy ass??"- she said, waking from the trance and making her best to look cool after all whole time staring at him.

- "Burn!!"- Mikey yelled and sat next to Joey at the end of the bed.

That party was wild. By two in the morning, everybody was trashed, and Frank was drunk as a skunk. He kept walking around the room, holding a beer, wearing the dragon onesie Joey had gotten him as a birthday present. Why? She didn't have a reason. She just wanted to see if he would wear it. And he loved it.

- "Bug!! My phone!!"- Mikey shouted and looked at the girl, who stood at the other side of the room, laughing with Ray and James.

- "No!"- she replied and frowned as Mikey stumbled over, wasted.

- "I need it!"

- "No, you don't!"

- "I have to call my mom"- he begged with closed eyes in a big pout.

- "No, you can't call you "mom" this drunk"- the girl said with air quotes- "I told you I was gonna stop you."

- "You also said you were gonna get drunk with me."

- "Dude, I am drunk! You are intoxicated. There is a bunch of booze in between, but I'm not sober, and that's the point."

- "Bug, that made no sense"- Ray said, laughing, also pretty drunk.

- "Shit!"- and she giggled.

- "Now, the phone!!"- Mikey demanded, again.

- "No! I'm not gonna give it to you!"- Joey argued and felt Mikey wrapping his arms around her, searching for the phone in her pockets- "Dude! I don't even have it with me!"

- "Where is it?"

- "Why is Mikey not allowed to use his phone?"- Frank asked with glassy drunken eyes.

- "'Cos he is wasted"- Joey simply explained as the youngest Way kept searching around for his phone- "You are not gonna find it bróðir!! gefast upp!! (give up!)."

- "Don't go all drunk and Icelandic at the same time!"- Frank argued and wrapped an arm around Joey's waist, laughing along with her.

- "þú ert sætur! (You are cute!)"- the girl chuckled and kissed Frank's cheek.

Gerard was burning in anger, sipping his diet coke at the other side of the room, staring at the scene, thinking of a way to stop it all. Being jealous of Frank hadn't happened before, and he didn't know how to deal with it 'cos he was his fucking best friend.

- "You are a lovely drunk. Now, what the fuck did you say?"

- "Happy birthday"- she lied and stuck out her tongue- "Mikey!!"- and she turned around and let Frankie go- "You are never gonna find it!"

- "But I wanna call her!!"- he shouted, starting to lose it.

- "Why?"

- "'Cos I love her"- he whispered and felt Joey hugging him.

- "Come on, bróðir. You shouldn't do this... you know what's gonna happen."

Mikey broke into tears, and everybody was lost 'cos none of them knew what had happened.

- "Mikey, are you ok?"- Gerard asked and walked to his brother, honestly worried

- "I'm getting a divorce"- he simply confessed- "And I didn't want you to know."

The whole bunch of friends stayed quiet. Joey hugged Mikey again and felt him sobbing on her shoulder.

- "Dude, I'm so sorry"- Ray walked over and rubbed on his friend's back, as pretty much everybody in the room walked to hug him.

- "And you are not calling her,"- Joey added, and the whole bunch agreed with her- "You and I made an agreement when we were sober, and I am going to respect it."

- "Bug is right, dude"- Ray sat down next to Mikey and wrapped an arm around his shoulder in support- "You are going to regret everything you say to her in the morning."

- "You know what we should do?"- Joey kind of yelled- "We have to go to the Red Light District! Right now! I am gonna buy you a lap dance, my dear brother!!"

The girl's eyes shone as soon as she delivered that line, and no one in the band said a thing until...

- "Fuck yeah!!"- Frank yelled- "It's my birthday, and we are doing this!!"

- "We are not leaving the hotel this drunk"- Ray quickly said, being a bummer.

- "Can you stop being a dad just for tonight?"- Joey asked and pinched his cheeks- "Please! I can buy you a lap dance too."

- "Can you give me a lapdance, Bug?"- Frank asked, and Gerard clenched his fist.

Way had been in silence the whole time, surprised by his brother's news and not getting what was going on with that drunk bunch of people.

- "I'm just asking 'cos you are offering a lot, and I could help you save some money"- Joey hit Frank's arm and didn't even answer. Instead, she looked at Ray again and pouted.

- "Please, dad! Let me get a stripper to my friend"- and Toro chuckled.

- "Fine, let's do this, just 'cos I don't wanna be a bummer."

- "But I don't want a stripper"- Mikey argued- "I just wanna call my wife and tell her I love her!"

- "Mikey, you are getting tits on your face. You are not calling that bitch! Come on!"- Joey grabbed his hand and forced him to stand up- "I know I got this hot for a reason tonight!"

James was the first one to avoid the plan and returned to his room. The same about their tour manager, though he gently got them a van to take them from and to the bar and tickets to get into the best strip club in the Red Light District.

Gerard was only coming along 'cos he was worried about his brother and Joey. And about the fact Frankie sat next to her in the van, wrapping an arm around her waist, again. She smiled and rested her head on his shoulder for a part of the trip, and Gerard couldn't do anything to stop it. He only knew he felt he had to rescue Joey from his friend. And make his best not to punch him in the process.

Gerard hadn't felt this jealous in years. Years. He didn't even remember if he had ever felt like that about his wife. Probably he had... but he couldn't recall it, 'cos this blind jealousy had taken over all his brain.

Joey was on fire that night. She was pretty drunk and mostly very worried about Mikey. He was her buddy and best friend in the band, and she wanted him to feel a little bit better. He had always been the nicest with her, aside from Ray. She wondered suddenly what nice thing she could do for Ray, but it was Mikey's moment that day.

They walked into the BonTon Stripclub Club Amsterdam, Joey singing Careless Whisper followed by the band. They were all pretty shy about going to a strip club. None of them would have ever thought about doing such a thing... well, not in a long while at least.

- "Come on, kids!"- she chuckled and thrust Mikey in.- "Let's get more booze and a lap dance for my buddy!"

- "Was she always this..."- but Gerard couldn't finish the sentence.

- "Fun? Drunk? Hot? Yeah, she has always been that"- Frank said, wasted, and followed the girl inside, grabbing her by the waist and walking to the bar.

But that time, Gerard didn't just stare. He quickly moved along and grabbed Joey's hand. Ray frowned and nodded. He totally got what was going on right away, and he knew how childish any dispute between Iero and Way could be. They were both like kids when they wanted the same thing, in this case, Joey's attention.

- "Hey... are you ok?"- Toro asked Mikey as he stood still, looking around in shock.

- "How did we end up here?"

- "Joey is gonna buy you a lap dance."

- "Right..."

- "Come on, buddy."

The band sat at the private VIP area, 'cos Ray (being the dad in every situation, even when drunk) thought it was better to catch the least attention as possible. Joey argued no one was going to pay attention to them in a strip club but gave up arguing when she got a champagne bottle in her hands and got to pick a girl for Mikey.

- "It's my birthday!"- Frank said and smiled in the sexiest way he could, considering how drunk he was.

- "Do you want a girl on your lap, too?"- Joey asked and grabbed another ten euros from her pocket- "Let me get a hot one!"

Frank chuckled, he didn't want one, but it was fun looking at the girl all hyperventilated.

- "Fuck! What if she makes out with a stripper? Shit! she totally should make out with a stripper! I wanna see her doing that!"- and now Frank couldn't get the idea from his head.

- "Ok, can we settle on being here for an hour and then going back to the hotel?"- Gerard tried to convince the bunch, but no one listened. Joey arrived with another girl, placed the money on her bra, and sat with the guys to enjoy the dance.

- "Mikey, Natasha was just telling me she thinks you are hot,"- Joey lied, 'cos the girl's name wasn't even Natasha, and she didn't speak English, but no one cared actually.

- "Really?"- "Natasha" kept dancing on Mikey's leg as he looked at her hypnotized. Joey chuckled, thinking at least for a while her friend wasn't going to think about the shitty wife who dumped him. She knew a stripper wasn't the solution to his problems, but it wasn't going to hurt under the circumstances.

Ray looked at Gerard and chuckled. For being the one who wanted to go home an hour ago, he seemed to be having a good time. Way sipped his diet coke and laughed as Joey and Mikey danced for them to a Loveage song. The girl kept putting bills on the edge of Mikey's pants as Frank spanked him.

- "Best birthday ever!"- he shouted- "Can we do this every year?"

- "You don't get to celebrate your birthday in Amsterdam every year, Jersey!"- Joey laughed and sat next to him to catch her breath- "Fuck, I'm tired"- she closed her eyes for a second, and the room started spinning- "Oh fuck! I'm wasted."

- "We should go back, then"- Gerard quickly said, staring at her with a worried gaze. It was apparent she had drunk way too much, and he still felt the urge to carry her in his arms and put her in a safe place, probably in his bed, to take care of her on his own.

- "Not until Mikey gets one last dance!"- Joey rang a bell, and Ray closed his eyes.

Honestly, Ray never thought Joey could be like that when she got drunk. Then again, you never really know anybody until you are locked with them on tour for weeks, not having many more people to talk with.

A stripper walked into the room, and Joey pointed at Mikey. But the woman walked to her instead and held her hand. Frank clapped like a maniac as Joey and the stripper started dancing together. Gerard wanted to stop the whole thing, and at the same time, he felt like staring at the show, hiding the boner in his pants. It was a hot scene. It was way too hot. He had material to jerk off for an entire month.

The stripper ran her hands over Joey's body as the girl chuckled nervously but actually enjoying her time. She knew it was harmless, and she was with her buddies... and Gerard. She was drunk, and for some weird reason, she wanted him to want her. She wanted him to think she was sexy.

- "I'm not gonna do anything about it, but if I fancy him, it's only fair that he fancies me as well"- she thought, drunk. And so, she slowly moved even closer to the stripper and smiled, staring into her eyes. The woman smiled back and slowly ran her tongue on her lips, landed her hands on Joey's waist, moving her closer to her and kissing her.

- "Holy shit!!"- Frank Iero yelled, jumping on his chair. Mikey widened his eyes, not believing what he was seeing, as Joey and the stripper kissed once more, with more passion, a little dirtier than the first, before giggling and splitting. Frank clapped. It was the only thing he could do with his hands in public at the moment. Ray did his best not to make eye contact with Joey, who blushed and sat down, looking at Gerard. She was a little embarrassed, a little aroused, and mostly wondering if Gerard Way wanted her at the moment. The answer was yes, but she had no idea how badly.

The stripper finished, and the whole gang stayed in silence. Joey chuckled again as Frank burst out laughing.

- "I thought the onesie was the perfect present, but that show was priceless. You, my friend, are the fucking best"- and Joey giggled.

- "Guys are so simple, a girl just gotta kiss a girl to get some attention"- she mumbled and yawned.

- "Bug, are you ok?"- Mikey asked and sat next to her- "Bug?"

- "I think she is falling asleep"- Gerard said and moved his brother away from her- "Let's take her back to the hotel."

- "Ok, I'm gonna pay"- Ray stood up, but Joey raised her arm and chuckled.

- "Dad, it's all covered."

- "What Bug?"- he leaned closer and moved the hair carefully from her face.

- "I owed you"- she smiled, and Ray sighed- "I told you I was gonna get you something with my first paycheck... I got you hoes!! Best drummer ever, right?"- the whole band nodded and smiled.

- "Best drummer ever, Iceland"- Frank stood up with her and kissed her temple- "Now let's get you to bed."

Gerard grabbed her jacket and made sure there was nothing else left when they left the room. They all walked to the door, doing their very best to look sober... of course, except for Gerard, who was, as always, the only one sober.

Raymond Toro carried Joey in his arms, bridal style, when they got off the van. Gerard was helping his brother Mikey walking, along with Frank, who was doing his best to look sober than he was.

- "Best fucking birthday ever!"- he chuckled in the elevator- "Thank you, guys."

- "We love you, Frankie"- Mikey whispered and tapped on his back- "Remember that when I throw up on you in a couple of minutes."

- "No one is going to throw up in the elevator. Come on, let's get Joey in bed,"- Ray argued immediately.

- "I'll puke in her bathroom"- Mikey nodded in agreement with his own words.

Gerard checked on her things until he found the key to her room, and everybody walked in. Mikey rushed into the bathroom and locked himself in there. Ray walked to the bed and carefully dropped Joey on it. Gerard took off her shoes and hesitated for a second if he should take anything else off. But he didn't.

- "Dude, we really trashed her room,"- Ray said and looked around. Frank was drinking a can of beer that was left on a table- "Really?"

- "I'm not even so..."- Frank didn't finish talking and gagged. He had to rush to the bathroom and fight for a place to puke.

- "This got wild"- Ray chuckled and started cleaning. He was wasted, but he still acted like the responsible one. Gerard didn't answer. He sat next to Joey and looked at her in silence.

- "Dude, stop that"- Ray argued right away.

- "What? I'm not doing anything"- Gerard tried to act cool, but it was too late.

- "I'm drunk, but I got it, you have a cr..."

- "Shh!"- Gee commanded his friend to stay quiet, and Toro chuckled.

- "So it's true."

- "I don't! I'm just worried about what happened today with the fan and how bad I acted when we met her... I just feel like I owe her being extra nice."

- "Sure, dude"- Ray laid on a couch and yawned- "Just remember I met you a million years ago, and you can't fool me that easily."

- "I am not fooling you, just... stop talking or even thinking about this."

- "Fine."

Ray yawned again and closed his eyes for a second. Gerard turned to Joey again to make sure she was asleep, suddenly he panicked, thinking she might have heard that conversation. But she didn't.

- "Ok, I feel better"- Mikey said, stumbling over the bed and lying next to Joey.

- "What the fuck are you doing?"- Gerard nearly yelled.

- "I'm crashing with Bug here 'cos I don't wanna sleep alone"- he kicked off his shoes and closed his eyes.

- "Dude, you can't sleep with her!"- Gerard wanted to do that, but he couldn't, so he wasn't going to let anyone sleep with her either.

- "Shut up, you are not mom"- Mikey argued, cuddled with Joey, and fell asleep a second later. Gerard was furious, staring at the scene. His little brother was spooning Joey, and he couldn't do anything about it.

- "Ray, help me take Mikey back to his room"- he said and turned to his friend: he was snoring on the couch- "You have to be fucking kidding me, Ray! Come one! Let's take Mikey to his room"- Gerard shook Toro's arm.

- "He's already asleep there. Let him rest"- he mumbled and took off his shoes.

- "Really? Are you doing this too?"- Ray didn't even answer- "Fucking shit!!"

Gerard was about to yell and force everybody out when he heard Frank retching in the bathroom. Way walked over and opened the door. Iero has kneeled next to the toilet, flushing.

- "Are you ok?"

- "Yeah! Best birthday ever"- Frank smiled and repeated- "We hadn't had this fun in a long time, everything has been so serious lately... it felt good to just... be stupid for a while"- Gerard knew Frank wasn't just talking about the band- "And that chick, man! She knows how to party"- Way smiled and nodded.

- "Come on, let's get you to your room"- Frank nodded, and both of them walked out of the bathroom.

- "And where's everybody?"

- "Crashing here apparently"- Frank looked at Ray on the couch and at Mikey on the bed.

- "Oh, man! I wanted to crash here!"

- "Well, you are not!"

- "Why not?"- Frank whined, almost pouting.

- "There is no room to crash here!"

- "There is room right there!"- Frank laughed and walked to Joey's bed, but Gerard grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

- "You are not getting there!"

- "Oh, come on! Mikey is there!"

- "Can you shut the fuck up?!"- Joey grunted, her eyes still closed- "If there's room somewhere in this bed, get in there, stay quiet and make sure Mikey won't puke on me."

She moved to a side and hugged her pillow.

Neither Gerard of Frank said a thing. They just kicked off their shoes and crawled into bed. That was the fucking moment the two of them had been waiting for. In a way, at least.

Mikey cursed as soon as he woke up. He felt someone had hit him in the head with a stone. He opened his eyes and stayed still in shock: Joey was sleeping next to him. And so he panicked immediately.

- "What the fuck did I do?! No! no! No! I didn't fuck my best friend! Please! Somebody tell me I didn't fuck my best friend!"

He looked down and noticed he was fully dressed and that his brother was sleeping next to him. He was drunk, but he would never fuck his own brother. So for a second or two, Mikey felt better.

That until he remembered why he had gotten so drunk and his chest ached. He was getting a divorce. His wife had confessed she had been cheating for months now. She said she didn't love him anymore. He felt like he wanted to die. Not in an emotional way, but physically and painfully.

Tears fell from his eyes, but he didn't want to cry in the middle of the room surrounded by his friends. So Mikey slowly stood up and looked for his shoes.

- "Thank you, Bug"- he whispered and looked at the girl snoring before leaving the room quietly.

Gerard opened his eyes and contained his breathing for a second. Joey was sleeping next to him. It took him a minute or two to gather all the pieces of the night before. He stared at her making his best not to move. His heart was racing. He knew none of what he felt was right. He loved his wife very much. He had to stay away from Joey. But at the same time, damn it! He wanted to kiss her.

- "I don't wanna think about this anymore. Just five more days and this leg of the tour will be over, and I won't see her for a month..."- he slowly moved his hand closer to her but didn't dare to touch her. She could wake up, and he would be busted.

Joey started waking up slowly but refused to open her eyes. Her head hurt, and her mouth was dry. Hangover hit her as soon as she stopped dreaming. What happened the night before? It was Frank's birthday, they got wasted in her room... Mikey was in terrible shape... she forced them to go to a strip...

- "Fuck!"- she wide opened her eyes and sat on the bed as soon as she remembered she had taken her friends to a strip club, paid for lap dances to pretty much everybody, and even made out with one of the strippers.

But it didn't get better when she opened her eyes, 'cos first thing she noticed was Gerard and Frank with her on the bed, jumping with her yell, waking up pretty scared.

- "Oh shit! What the fuck are you doing here?"- she wide opened her eyes in shock

- "What? Oh... hey, Bug"- Frank opened his eyes and smiled- "We crashed your room 'cos we were too drunk to move."

Iero simply answered and laid back, to keep on sleeping. Joey looked at him and Ray on the couch, waving and literally falling asleep again a second later.

- "Are you ok?"- Gerard whispered and made her chill immediately. Gerard Way was sleeping with her on her bed. What the fuck?

- "My head is killing me"- the girl laid back and turned to him- "Fjandinn! (Damn!)"- she covered her face with both hands and wished to be sucked by the earth as soon as the memories kept hitting her- "Did I..."

- "Yeah, you kissed a stripper..."- Gerard whispered and smiled. Joey's cheeks were burning as she kept her eyes closed and covered herself with a blanket

- "Fuck, I'm so sorry, I never get so drunk and stupid and... I just..."

- "Nah, it's ok"- he whispered, making sure neither Ray nor Frank would wake up- "I mean, it was a fun night..."- he added, in a hopeless attempt to make the girl feel a little better.

- "Yeah, it was... but shit, I feel I made a fool out of myself"

- "Don't worry... you didn't"- Gerard made a pause and stared at her in deep silence for a moment- "It was... very... "it was so fucking hot! the way kissed that girl, I got a hard-on for so long, I almost locked myself in the bathroom of the bar to jerk off like a manic" very nice of you to try to cheer Mikey up."

- "He was so sad... he has been so fucking sad for so long..."

- "So you knew the whole thing?"- Joey stayed still and looked into the hazel eyes next to her. She could lie... but what for? Mikey had told everybody everything already.

- "Yeah... we've... he trusted me with his problems, and I've been trying to cheer him up ever since"- she made a pause and watched how Gerard's face was calmed and sweet. It was hard to concentrate if he was there staring at her- "Ég elska augun þín (I love your eyes)."

- "What?"- Gerard whispered, confused.

- "I... "Stupid!! It's a good thing you are rambling in Icelandic and not in English!" nothing, I'm just cursing 'cos my head is killing me."

- "Do you want to sleep some more?"- she nodded and took a look at her wristwatch.

- "It's too early to be awake"- he nodded and looked at her smile, scared to ask what he was about to.

- "Do you want me to go?"- he murmured and fought the instinct of moving closer to her.

- "No..."- she whispered immediately, not even thinking- "You can stay."

They looked at each other for a few seconds felt like minutes, though. Until Joey moved slowly on the bed and grabbed a blanket

- "Are you cold?"- Gerard asked and moved the blanket closer to her

- "Thank you"- he covered her with it and automatically wrapped his arms around her protectively, snuggling with her.

- "Goodnight, Gerard."

- "Goodnight, Joey."

When Frank woke up, he had to take a minute to remember where he was and what had happened the night before. He heard Ray's snores from somewhere in the room with him and rolled in the bed to see Joey and Gerard sleeping next to him.

- "What the fuck happened?"

Iero nearly grunted, staring at the scene. He remembered Mikey drunk puking, Joey kissing a girl, and... that was it. But none of that actually mattered that much, considering how pissed he was staring at Joey in Gerard's arms. She looked cozy and calmed, and... she could look even better in his arms. Why was she in Gerard's anyway?

Frank stared at her for a few seconds and then started coughing. Fake cough, noisy cough. Stridently enough to wake everybody up in a minute.

- "Are you dying?"- Joey asked, opening her eyes and staring at him, honestly concerned

- "I hope so, 'cos I feel like dying"- she smiled at him still in Gerard's arms. He was the big spoon in the hug, so Joey never saw his face when he woke up with her in his arms. Only Frank noticed that glance in his eyes. But refused to think his friend had a crush on the girl he was crushed on. They were both married men. They couldn't even think of being crush on her. It was just some silly thing, nothing to worry about.

- "Happy birthday, Jersey"- she whispered and smiled at her friend.

- "Thank you Iceland, I had a lot of fun last night."

- "It's still your birthday"- the girl added- "We can still do fun shit."

- "Stop trying to make fun shit"- Ray argued and walked from the couch to the bed, laying at it, next to Joey and Frank- "You are too young, and we are all old men who need to rest and eat soup."

The girl chuckled at his words and raised her hand, reaching Ray's wavy hair.

- "Move closer, old man, let me pet you"- she argued, and Ray chuckled.

- "We are not old men"- Gerard whispered and refused to take his arms from around Joey's waist, even though Ray and Frank could see him, and everybody knew it was weird.

- "You are the only one who's not hungover, man"- Frank smiled, watching how Joey was now braiding Ray's hair- "And yet last night you were the one who kept repeating we had to go back to the hotel."

- "'Cos you were all too drunk, especially you"- he said and shook Joey's arm sweetly.

- "Sorry, Gerard. I won't get that drunk and irresponsible again."

- "So you won't kiss strippers anymore?"- Frank asked, and Ray burst out laughing. Joey quickly grabbed a pillow and covered her head with it, forcing Gerard to remove his arms from around her.

- "I am never drinking again!"- the girl sentenced and stood up a few minutes later- "Now if you gentlemen excuse me, I am going to take a long shower. Then, I hunt this whole hotel for coffee... dad, when do we leave?"

- "After lunch, my dear, promiscuous, and slightly lesbian daughter"- Ray joked, and Joey grunted, walking to the bathroom and locking the door behind her back.

- "Get out of my room!!"- she yelled before starting the shower. Frank and Gerard sighed as Ray pulled them out of bed.

- "Come on! You heard her! Let's go!"

Joey took the longest shower. Well, Gerard's was longer 'cos he was jerking off. Just as Frank... not in the same shower. But it's not the point. Joey stood under the hot water for a good fifteen minutes 'cos she actually felt bad. She had flirted with Frank and with Gerard. She didn't know if they had noticed it, but she had, in fact, been a flirt with the two of them while being seriously drunk.

Besides, she slept with Mikey, Gerard, and Frank on the same bed. That wasn't better either. They were her friends, but they just met a few weeks before. She couldn't just act like that! They were all married. And besides, they were technically her employers.

Everything about the night before was wrong except for the part where they cheered Mikey up. Mikey worried Joey the most, and he and Ray were the only ones she wanted to talk to that day.

After her shower, Joey got into her sports outfit and hit the gym. She wasn't into it for beauty, but because she had to keep and work on her upper body strength for drumming. Besides, working out kept her mind from rambling into random thoughts, like Gerard's arms around her body. Damn, that felt good, which made it something very, very bad.

Gerard knocked on Mikey's room and waited, looking down at his shoes until his little brother showed up. Neither of them said a thing. Mikey walked back to his bed, and Gerard closed the door behind his back.

- "If you are coming here with the whole "Why didn't you tell me?" speech, I'm not in the mood for giving you stupid explanations."

- "I just wanted to bring you coffee"- Gee whispered and handed Mikey a cup.

- "Thanks."

- "How's the hangover?"

- "It's lovely, I am dying"- Mikey chuckled and closed his eyes for a moment. The tv was on, though neither of them paid any attention to it. Gerard sat next to his brother on the bed, and they stared at the screen for a while.

- "Frank is dying too."

- "The little rat was on fire last night... shit, how's Bug?"- Mikey asked, honestly concerned- "I'm gonna text her, her head gotta hurt like shit, hangover and hit with a bottle..."

- "She was fine. She kicked us out of the room and got into the shower."

- "Did she remember the whole stripper thing?"- Mikey snorted at his own words as she texted Joey.

- "Yeah, she was pretty embarrassed."

- "Dude, your boner was epic!"- Gerard looked at his brother and frowned, disgusted and busted.

- "What the fuck, man?!"

- "You looked so fucking funny trying to be the cool one"- Mikey was now laughing. Making fun of his brother was always something that made him feel better- "And hiding your woody with a jacket, adorable!"

- "Fucker!"- Gerard smacked his brother's head, but Mikey kept laughing.

- "You were at a strip club with two girls making out. You weren't the only one!"

- "Stop!!"

- "It's awkward to think about it because we were all hard at the same time, which is pretty much like watching porn together, and that's disturbing!"

- "Stop it!"

- "Never!! I'm the annoying little brother you had a hard-on with last night!!"- Mikey was laughing, and Gerard was disgusted- "Shit! That didn't come out quite right."

- "You think??!"

Gerard smacked him again, and they stayed quiet for another while. Mikey sighed and looked at the tv for another while. It was some random local show he couldn't even understand. But it was better than thinking.

- "Thanks for the coffee"- he whispered, and Gerard nodded

- "Any time you want..."- the silence continued for a while until Mikey turned to his brother and tried to explain.

- "I didn't want to tell you 'cos I didn't want to talk about it. I didn't even want to think about it, 'cos it made it real, and I kept trying to pretend it was all in my head"- he made a pause and rearranged the words in his head- "I told Bug 'cos I didn't know her, she was there, I was drunk... I trusted her, and she was understanding with the whole "we are not analyzing this shit" deal. We just talked about random shit the whole time, and whenever I felt bad, I'd told her, and she would come up with something to do to ease my mind."

- "She is a good friend"

- "The best..."

- "I'm sorry I was jealous you were spending too much time with her"- Gerard was honest. However, he meant he didn't know his brother needed to hang out with her so badly, and he was just jealous Mikey had her attention the whole time.

- "Anyway... I still don't wanna talk about it."

- "That's cool."

- "So, let's pretend none of that happens or even exists."

- "Deal"- Gerard wrapped an arm around Mikey and rested his head on his shoulder- "Wanna go get something to eat?"

- "Not really"

- "Too bad I'm forcing you 'cos I don't wanna eat alone."

- "Fuck you."

- "I'm your annoying older brother. Deal with it."

Frank wiped off the tears as he stared at his daughters on the screen of his phone. They were so beautiful, sleeping in their little cribs. Jamia smiled and whispered happy birthday for the hundredth time to her husband.

- "I miss you so fucking much"- he said and sighed.

- "Just a few more days and you'll be changing diapers"- she answered with a big smile- "I'm happy you had a big celebration last night."

- "Yeah, it turned into a "let's cheer Mikey up" kind of thing pretty quickly, though."

- "I can't believe she cheated."

- "Me neither... I wanna kill her. He doesn't deserve this."

- "At least he has you there."

- "Yeah, Joey was so drunk she dragged us into a strip club and bought Mikey so many lap dances"- Jamia stayed still thinking what she had just heard- "Sorry, I mean, nothing happened."

- "Frank, calm down. I just never imagined she would be like that."

- "Neither did we... but she... Mikey had only told her about it, and I guess she was desperate to get him happy somehow."

- "That's nice"- and Jamia meant it- "What happened with her head?"

- "She is pretty hungover."

- "I mean, with the hit she got from that fan, Frank."

- "Sorry"- he smiled and watched his wife's face- "She is ok, she was very calmed, Ray was a dad."

- "Shocking!"

- "Yeah"- Frank chuckled- "Her boyfriend hates me, though."

- "Frank, what you did was so fucking stupid, and I feel you still don't get it! I should hate you for making that hot guy mad at you! Now we are never gonna be his friends... and I wanted to spend the holidays with him in California, where it's hot, and he can walk around without a shirt!"

- "Jamia Iero!!"- and she chuckled.

- "Sorry, I got carried away."

- "Yeah, you did."

- "Happy birthday, Frank."

- "Thank you."

- "You are the only hot guy I wanna see without a shirt"- he blushed and smiled.

- "'Cos I've got amazing tattoos?"

- "Yeah, that too."

Ray and Joey were having lunch together in the hotel. The two of them were eating, sunglasses on, and drinking coffee with their food. That's how bad it was.

- "Please stop me next time you see me with a drink."

- "Ditto"- he quickly answered ad smiled- "You seemed to be having a lot of fun, though."

- "I was."

- "I never imagined you were that wild when drunk"- and Joey laughed a little. Her head didn't let her make or listen to loud noises.

- "Well, I'm not wild... I just... sometimes..."- she made a pause and blushed. The truth was simple: he never really partied that much. She didn't have a lot of friends to party like that. Tucker was the only one, actually. And they never saw each other.

- "Is everything ok?"

- "Yeah, just don't tell Matthew about the stripper"- and Ray nodded, laughing.

- "Deal... the whole strip club thing or just the kiss?"

- "The whole deal, especially the kiss, I don't know if he is going to like that."

- "Why not? It was hot"- Joey raised an eyebrow and stared at her friend- "Sorry, it was..."

- "I mean, Matthew has this thing where he keeps trying to treat me like a little porcelain doll or a fragile princess. And that's so not me. If he knows what I did, I just feel that he will think less of me or something."

Ray looked at Joey and noticed how honest and vulnerable she was. For the first time since they met, Ray saw her winding down her shield.

- "Come on, Bug. It's not like you killed someone."

- "I know..."

- "You should tell him because it's a good party story, and he is gonna think it's awesome. Besides, Gubler looks like a nice guy who loves you very much,"- she nodded in silence and sipped her coffee.

- "He is the sweetest guy I've ever been with."

- "See?"

- "I just don't wanna disappoint him"- Toro landed a hand on her, and she smiled- "This is when you say, "If he hurts you, I'm gonna kill him" or something dad like"- he chuckled and nodded

- "You know that's how I feel"- he smiled and stayed in silence for a second- "And you are grounded for being such a party animal"- he added in a very paternal tone of voice.

- "But dad!! All the guys were drinking!"

- "I don't care what the other kids did! You are grounded, and tonight we are staying at the hotel watching horror movies"- she smiled and nodded.

- "Best plan ever, dad."

The ride to Paris was very quiet. Everybody was still tired from the night before, so they all basically just slept the whole trip. Now Joey was avoiding Gerard and also Frank. She decided to keep a safe and professional distance from the two of them. Joey still felt awkward about everything that had happened the night before.

- "I'll see you guys tomorrow"- the drummer smiled as they got the keys to their rooms. Gerard smiled and waved. She cut him the tiniest smile on earth and turned to the rest of the guys.

- "It's still my birthday Iceland, we should eat something and maybe go out and see the city, what do you say?"- he shook her arm with a huge grin- "Where is the party girl from last night?"

- "She stayed in Amsterdam, sorry"- she answered- "Go and have fun, I just need to do nothing for a night"- Joey grabbed her bags and walked to the elevator.

- "Everything ok with her?"- Gerard asked, watching her walk away. He felt her distance, and it bothered him. After waking up with her in his arms, he just wanted to keep her close.

- "Yeah, she is ok"- Ray nodded and grabbed his bag- "Wanna get room service and watch a movie? Halloween special?"- the whole gang stayed in silence- "Fine, I'll be eating and watching some Halloween classics alone."

Joey lied about not wanting to do anything or about being tired. She just didn't want to be with Gerard or Frank. Mostly Gerard. So she locked in her room and talked with Matthew for a long while instead.

- "I can't believe I'm not spending Halloween with you."

Joey pouted as she looked at Matthew, sitting on his couch, wearing the dorky Halloween sweater she had gotten for him, eating candies. She was wearing the dorky Halloween sweater he had gotten for her, eating candies as well.

- "Yami, when we are together, every night is Halloween"- he whispered and smiled.

- "That's the cutest thing ever!"- she blushed, and he giggled- "What are you doing tonight?"

- "The guys are gonna come to watch some terror classics with me."

- "I was going to do the same with Ray"- she smiled, and so did he.

- "So, did Mikey overcome his hungover?"

- "Yeah, he is a champ, we watched a few movies on the bus on our way over, and I'm guessing he is in his room right now."

- "And the rest of the guys?"

- "I think they were all pretty sick today... we kind of went real wild last night."

- "How wild?"- Gubler raised an eyebrow and looked at Joey. The girl sighed and bit his lips.

- "I might have gotten drunk."

- "And?"- Matthew wasn't enjoying the course of the conversation.

- "And I... decided to... cheer Mikey up."

- "How?"

- "I took him and the guys to a strip club and paid lap danced for everybody."

Joey just spit it. She had to say it. She wasn't going to be able to keep it from her boyfriend that much longer anyway.

- "If he is going to be mad at that... then maybe he is not as cool as I thought,"- she said to herself as she stared at his face, as a grin appeared on his lips.

- "What?! a strip club?! I can't believe it"- and Matthew Gray Gubler burst out laughing- "You are so amazing!!"

- "Do you really think so?"- Matthew was still laughing, and Joey was in shock.

- "Yes, Yami! That's pretty cool"- the sigh sighed, relieved, and kept her eyes on Gubler.

- "I also kissed a stripper... a little bit."

- "Wow!"- Matthew almost choke on the candy corn he was eating.

- "She kissed me actually, I didn't do anything or asked for anything.... she kissed me, and I laughed and... that's it..."- Joey closed her eyes and stayed very still.

- "You had a wild night without me, young girl!"- Matthew stared at the screen, trying his best to stay serious- "Is there any chance someone had footage of that moment?"

- "No"- Joey pouted and opened an eye to see how Matthew was taking her confession. He was still smiling- "You are not mad at me?"

- "'Cos you kissed a stripper? No, Joey. It's a bit upsetting I missed it, but I am not mad at you,"- she smiled and blushed.

- "I can kiss a stripper when I come home so you can watch"- Matthew laughed and grabbed his phone, kissing the screen.

- "I just want your kisses, Joey."

- "I'm a good kisser"- the girl joked, chuckling.

- "Yes, you are. That stripper is a fortunate woman"- there was a pause in the call. Matthew had to get something out of his system- "Can you please promise me you will not put yourself at risk again, please?"

- "With my wild party lifestyle? I swear I am not drinking again after last night!"- Joey chuckled, but Matthew Gray was serious.

- "I mean, with the fan and your head."

- "Akumu, you know I can take care of myself."

- "Yes, I do... but..."- and this was something that frustrated him the most- "I want to be there to protect you if you are in danger."

- "I am not in danger."

- "You are away, and I love you. If anything happens to you, I would never forgive myself for being so far."

- "Matthew Gray, I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself. And if something bad happens to me, it would never be your fault, 'cos your work is not taking care of me like a little princess. Your job as my boyfriend is to love me and support me the way I love you and support you."

That frustrated Matthew, 'cos he loved her and he wanted to protect her. He knew life had been hard on her. He knew why she could be so rational and independent. He just wished she could ever let him take care of her the way he wanted to.

- "Promise you'll come home safe"- he whispered, and she nodded

- "That I can do, 'cos I have too many kisses to give you, Akumu."

Ray walked to his room and laid in bed, talked with his wife, and ordered dinner. He was still pretty tired from the night before.

- "Dad? Movies?"- he read the text and smiled

- "Thought you were tired"

- "You promised"

- "Come over."

- "Everything ok, Bug?"- he asked when the two of them sat on his bed and picked a classic movie for the night: Halloween, the 1978 original.

- "Yeah, why?"

- "I don't know. You look off."

- "I'm hungover dude, this is the best you are getting tonight"- he nodded and grabbed a bunch of the candies Joey had brought. She was loaded with sugar for the night. Tons of Halloween candies, her only way to be close to Matthew that night. That, and the sweater.

The two of them laid down and watched the movie in silence. Ray wrapped an arm around her, and Joey rested her head on his shoulder. Neither of them overanalyzed it. It just felt nice and friendly.

- "Dude, there is something I've been longing to ask you for a long while"- she said, not moving her eyes from the screen.

- "Shoot"

- "How do you keep your hair so good?"- Ray chuckled and messed with her hair- "No! Don't destroy the best I could do with my hair today!"- she giggled and grabbed her phone after feeling the hum of a text- "Mikey wants to hang out, can he come?"

- "Are you asking me for permission to bring a friend over?"- Ray asked and closed his eyes- "Shit, I am your dad."

- "Yes, embrace it"- Joey grinned and cuddled back with him- "And thank you for that, I don't let guys take care of me"

Her conversation earlier with Matthew was still spinning around her head. She let her boyfriend take care of her, but maybe Gubler couldn't see it... she had softened a lot being with him in the last six months. Perhaps it wasn't evident for everybody, but it was for her.

- "Wait! Are you sure you are indeed letting me taking care of you?"- Toro's eyes widened, surprised at that confession.

- "Yeah! Since I signed that contract"- Joey made a pause and made her best to explain- "I kept thinking about what we talked about earlier... you give the protector friend I never had vibe 'cos..." - Ray held her hand and rubbed it with his.

- "'Cos?"

- "'Cos I'm not really good with friends, I usually push people away."

- "You haven't done that with me."

- "I know. That's weird... you give a long-lost best friend feeling like Mikey gives me the older brother sensation."

- "You feel like a little sister- she smiled and stood up to answer the door- "But I don't think you push people away."

- "I do... that's what I've been told at least."

Mikey smiled at the other side of the door and raised his arm, showing a paper bag.

- "I've got candies."

- "Awesome! Come in."

- "You are not pushing me away, Bug!"- Ray finished the conversation and smiled- "Hey dude."

- "What are you talking about?"

- "Joey says she pushes people away"- Toro sum up as Joey laid back next to him, and they cuddled again.

- "You are doomed. You are not pushing me anywhere"- Mikey added, kicked off his shoes and laid next to her, holding her hand- "You are fucking stuck with a Mikey Way now."

Joey chuckled and sighed

- "Guess I'll have to learn how to deal with that."

Gerard was staring at the ceiling, mortified. He had talked with his wife already, he was definitely not hungry, and he just wanted to knock on Joey's door and ask her if everything was ok. She hasn't talked to him since that morning, and it honestly felt she was ignoring him. That wasn't normal. No one ignored him.

- "You are not going!"- he said to himself in his head as soon as he stood up from the bed- "No! No way!"- he grabbed the key to his room and put on his shoes- "Fucking stop!! Aren't you listening to me?!"- his brain kept yelling, but his body was still moving.

- "Hello! This is Gerard Way from room 1305, can you tell me which is Maria Sveinbjörndottir's room, please? Yes, she is part of my crew."

He waited in line for a second, and to his happiness, Joey had a room on his floor, just two doors down. It was heaven to Gerard. He took a deep breath and walked over. He planned to ask if there was something wrong, smile, and go back to his room. That was it. That was everything. He just wanted to make sure everything was ok. Nothing else.

He knocked and waited. Nothing. Again. He waited a little longer, 'cos maybe Joey was asleep. Or in the shower... or something. But nothing. Slightly worried and mostly scared she could be with Frank, Gerard texted Mikey, just in case he was with her, 'cos he knew they were closer.

- "At Ray's, 1002"- Mikey texted back and stared at the screen again.

- "Why is there always a sex scene in every horror movie ever?"- Joey asked and kept chewing fun-sized snickers, or like Mikey kept calling them: Frank-sized.

- "I guess it's the guide of who's dying next"- Ray answered and grabbed some candies, too- "If you think about it, half of the fun in horror movies is figuring out who will die."

- "You are right..."

- "And it also helps to set the mood when you are watching a horror movie with a date"- the girl turned to Mikey, and he smiled guiltily- "If she is scared and she hugs you, you win proximity, but when a couple is banging on the screen, you win the chance to start rubbing her and getting the idea of having sex into her head."

- "You are disgusting"- Joey quickly argued and heard a knock on the door- "Please tell me that's a pizza. I would kill for a pizza right now."

- "Damn it, Bug!"- Ray argued as Mikey stood up to get the door- "Now I want pizza too!"

- "Hey dude"- Gerard stared at his brother and took a peek inside the room- "What are you doing?"

- "Watching movies"- the youngest Way walked around and headed back to the bed. Gerard closed the door and followed him, only to feel his heart aching. Joey was cuddled with Ray. His arm was around her. Her head was on his shoulder. Gerard wanted to hit him.

- "Hey... I didn't know you were busy"- Way whispered and stared at the scene. Joey looked at him, and her eyes just lock into his. Gerard didn't stop looking at her either. He felt betrayed. Or worst, he felt maybe their time together wasn't really that special, 'cos she would cuddle with everybody in the band, 'cos they were her friends and she wasn't making a big deal out of it like he was.

- "We are watching horror movies, wanna join us?"- Ray asked and smiled. He immediately noticed what was going on in Gerard's head and realized he would have to talk with his friend. He felt he was too crushed on Joey for his own good.

- "No... I just wanted to..."- Gerard wouldn't stop staring at Joey in Ray's arms. It just hurt too much.

- "Come on"- she whispered and moved from Toro's side- "There is room for one more. Besides, Ray is failing in his poor attempt to make me feel secure."

- "Dude!!"- Ray argued and softly elbowed her.

- "Auch!! You hurt me!!"- Joey exaggerated and rolled in the bed. Gerard smiled, though he was still feeling pretty jealous.

- "I'm gonna get that pizza"- Ray picked up the phone and dialed. Joey tapped on the bed and invited Gerard.

- "We've got Halloween candies"- she said, smiling. The drummer wanted to keep a distance from him, but watching him was making it too hard. He sat next to her and looked at the bag.

- "We ate most of the Snickers, but there are still some m&m's and Life Savers"- she whispered and felt Mikey's arm coming from behind her trying to reach the candies.

- "Bug ate all the good ones"- he argued.

- "Bróðir þegiðu!! (brother, shut up!)"- the girl quickly answered and slapped Mikey's hand coming out of the bag.

- "How many of these have you ate?"- Gerard asked and frowned- "You seemed to be a little sugar-rushed."

- "Maybe... could be... but it's Halloween, Gerard, it's the day I am allowed to do this, you can't judge me, you can only join me."

Joey raised an eyebrow making her best to look sexy. She shouldn't have, but she meant it as a joke. Not really. She just wanted to lie to herself. Just like the night before in the strip club, she wanted him to want her. Gerard grabbed an m&m and opened it. Joey turned to the screen and laid back in the bed to watch the movie. The oldest Way did the same and sat next to Mikey, 'cos it was wiser to stay away from the girl he wanted to make out with.

- "Where's Frank?"- Joey asked after a while

- "Out with James and Worm"- Mikey answered- "Now shut up and let me watch the movie."

- "Sorry"- the girl chuckled and opened another Snicker's bar. She wanted to be away from Gerard. But his body was a magnet too intense to resist.

After Halloween, they watched Bran Stocker's Dracula. Ate pizza and had a relaxed evening. It was all good until Joey decided it was time to go to bed. She yawned and stood up. She had managed to stay between Ray and Mikey the whole time, successfully avoiding being close to Gerard. She was actually proud of herself.

- "Ok kids, I'm going to bed"- she announced and grabbed her shoes, standing up- "It's not time to make a change, just relax, take it easy"- she sang, and Mikey threw her a pillow

- "I hate that song."

- "Me too! But shit is right there everything time I say goodbye. I don't know why my brain makes that fucking connection every fucking single time"

- "I'm going to bed too"- Gerard said, and Ray raised an eyebrow- "It's late, and we have a busy day tomorrow, full of interviews."

- "Yeah, we have to meet at the lobby tomorrow at nine, ready to leave"- Ray announced- "We start with a radio show at ten-thirty."

- "Oh fuck!"- Mikey whined immediately, and Joey grinned.

- "And while you do that, I'll hit the gym and relax"- she said and stuck out her tongue to her friend.

- "Shut up! No one likes a showoff."

- "No one likes a bad loser"- she added and jumped.

- "Ok, Bug, you really need to calm down. You had too much sugar"- Ray laughed, staring at her.

- "Fuck, you are right, I'm not gonna sleep in a long while... maybe I can make a marathon of scary movies... The Exorcist was in the pay-per-view, I'll watch it all alone and fucking traumatize myself" - the girl jumped on her spot and chuckled.

- "Ok, come on, let's go"- Mikey grabbed her arm and started walking to the door- "Bye, Ray."

- "Bye kids"

- "Thanks for taking care of me, dad!"- Joey smiled at him and waved.

- "Anytime you want, kiddo."

Gerard, Mikey, and Joey walked into the elevator. The girl pressed the 13th button and Mikey the 12th.

- "Which one?"- he asked, looking at his older brother.

- "I'm in the 13th too"- he answered with a short smile and avoided looking at Joey, which was pretty good for her, 'cos her cheeks were burning red.

- "Fuck! Fuck! Just say goodnight and lock yourself in your room, just say goodnight, and that's it!"- the elevator's door opened, and the girl smiled at Mikey.

- "Good night, bróðir"

- "Good night, Bug. I'll text you tomorrow"- Gerard smiled at his brother and tapped on his back- "Good night, dude."

- "See you in the morning"- he walked to the hallway with Joey and heard the door closing behind them.

- "I'm going this way"- the girl whispered and hoped Gerard was going the other way

- "Me too"- they walked in silence for a few seconds, it felt awkward, and the two of them knew it- "Joey, listen, I wanted to talk to you about something"- he just said it.

- "This is my room"- she announced, hoping to manage to get away from him.

- "Do you mind if I come in for a second?"- his words surprised him. He didn't think when he asked that. Joey didn't really have a reason to say no. She didn't want to say no. And so she nodded and opened the door.

- "Come in."

Her body shook at the realization they were alone in her room. Completely alone, just the two of them. That had only happened once before, and this time, somehow, it felt dangerous.

- "What is it?"- Joey asked and walked around the room, taking off her shoes and making her best to avoid eye contact.

- "I just... had the feeling you were mad at me over something."

- "Why would you feel that?"- she asked, pretending to be surprised. She wasn't mad at him. She was mad at herself for being such a flirt.

- "'Cos you avoided me the whole day"- he simply answered.

- "That's not true. I've been hungover most of the day, sleeping on the bus."

That was a lie. She watched tv with Mikey the whole trip, though they slept most of the time.

- "It felt like you were mad at me"- he said and kept looking at her, knowing she was avoiding his eyes.

- "You got it all wrong"- she simply answered and smiled, opening her bag and looking for a pajama- "Why would I be mad at you?"

- "I don't know..."- Gerard stayed quiet and walked around the room- "I know we didn't start with the right foot, and sometimes I feel like I'm still walking on eggshells when it comes to you"- he simply confessed. Joey raised his eyes to meet him.

- "Sometimes I feel the same about you. Until we talked about it, I actually felt you were avoiding me after we fell asleep together."

Joey made a pause and regretted landing her eyes on his. There it was, the magnet pushing her closer to him. He stood in front of her, feeling the same.

- "Maybe we are overthinking everything"- he whispered, and Joey nodded

- "Maybe we are."

- "So... friends?"- he reached out his hands to her and bit his lips- "You don't wanna be her friend, you really want to fuck her brains off, and you know it, don't you, Gerard Way?"

- "Friends"- Joey shook his hands and smiled- "I don't know why I've got the feeling this shit will never work out well."

They kept shaking their hands in silence for a while, longer than it should have been. They just stared and smiled at each other, lost in thoughts.

- "So..."- Joey finally whispered- "How are the crowds here in France?"- she asked the most random question ever, just to talk about something.

- "They are wild. It's fun playing here."

- "Great"

- "Never been to France?"

- "Never been to Europe, except Iceland"- Gee smiled and kept looking at her, still standing right in front of each other. He was fighting the urge to touch her. But it was too dangerous. The attraction he felt for her might actually cause him not to be able to stop once he began.

- "Maybe we can push the schedule to show you around, at least the Eiffel Tower"- the girl smiled and nodded.

- "That would be awesome"- and silence again, staring at each other was probably the only thing they couldn't stop doing when together.

- "And... are you gonna watch The Exorcist?"

- "Yeah, I'm not sleepy. Ray was right, I am in a sugar rush... and the worst part is, I still have some candy left, and I'm considering the idea of finishing them today"- Gerard smiled and watched how Joey took another bag of candies from her backpack.

- "Girl! Where did you get so many sweets?!"

- "Gub and I made matching candy bags for Halloween,"- she answered with a big smile- "And Mikey got me some more. I might have an addiction problem."

- "I bet you do"- Gerard stared at her with a smile and asked without thinking of his words- "Would you like some company to watch the movie?"- the girl wide opened her eyes and took a deep breath- "Don't feel pushed or something like that"- Gerard quickly added when he noticed her reaction- "I just... I'm not sleepy, and the idea of eating more candies was pretty tempting"- she giggled nervously and nodded.

- "Sure, let's watch the movie together, but you better be braver than Ray. He kept jumping with every scene.2

Gerard smiled and agreed. The two of them knew it was a bad, terribly dangerous idea. But still, it was what the two of them wanted.

They sat on the bed staring at the screen in silence for a good twenty minutes. They ate candies, they watched the movie, they were behaving great. But Gerard knew it was all bullshit. He needed to move closer and wrap his arms around her. It was totally harmless, though. Just a hug, not kissing, no nothing. Just holding her close, like the other day at the bus, or just like the night before. That had felt too good. He needed more of that.

- "I'm gonna get under the covers"- the girl announced and shivered- "I'm fucking freezing."

- "Sure"- Gerard stood up and moved the blankets, watching her getting under them.

- "Are you cold?"- she asked, and he nodded- "You can come too"- and so he did.

- "I could come, that's a fact"- he mentally slapped himself for thinking that.

- "What the fuck is your problem?! You got him in your bed! Underneath the fucking blankets! Do you have any kind of idea of the signals you are sending him?"- Joey was freaking out as she felt Gerard's warm body next to her- "I just hope he doesn't think I wanna make out with him or whatever... I mean, no, why should he anyway? I can do this with Mikey or with Ray, and I would never worry they could come with that idea... well, that's 'cos they are my friends, and I don't wanna fuck them the way I wanna fuck Gerard. Oh shit, Joey, you are fucking sick. Did you know that?"

Joey covered her face and jumped when a possessed Linda Blair kept stabbing her vagina with a crucifix. Gerard chuckled and felt how she instinctively moved to him and looked for protection. She did it so normally; she didn't even think about it. That part of the movie had always made her jump.

- "Come on"- Gee wrapped an arm around her and fondled her arm sweetly- "It's just a movie."

- "I know, but that's too upsetting to be true"- she covered her eyes again and hid her face on Gerard's neck.

- "It's ok, sugar"- he whispered and landed a small soft peck on her head.

His heart stopped for a second. He called Joey a pet name and kissed her. He hadn't. He shouldn't. He needed to undo it. Joey stayed still and made what anyone under those circumstances would do: she ignored the kiss and the pet name, sat down, and kept watching the movie.

- "I hate pet names, I hate cute nicknames, and yet, that one was heart-melting. Gerard Way fucking called me sugar..."- Joey sighed and made her best to focus on the exorcism taking place on the screen. It was very hard, though, considering all she could think of was Gerard's arm around her.

The movie ended, and neither of them moved. Joey was hoping Gerard was asleep, so he would stay with her the whole night and cuddle. Gerard felt the same. Exactly the same. The girl slowly moved from his chest and looked at him. His perfect nose, his thin lips. It was too tempting to have him there.

He blinked a few times and cut her a short smile. She rubbed her eyes and sighed.

- "Thank you for watching the movie with me Gerard, it was worse than I remembered"- he kept the smile on his lips as he rubbed his hand against his arm, still hugging her.

- "I'm glad I could help."

- "Best friend ever"- she whispered to remind herself she had to keep that distance.

Gerard fake grinned and stared at her. She was so close, he could simply just lean in a little and kiss her. It was so simple. She was right there. She stayed still, her eyes locked in his. She was never going to be his friend, and she knew it. That was an impossible friendship, no matter how much she'd try.

- "I have to sleep"- she whispered, but neither of them moved.

- "Me too"- they just stared at each other in silence. Neither wanted to move, but both knew it had to happen.

- "Thank you for hanging out with me"- Joey added, and Gerard nodded

- "My pleasure"- and pleasure was in Gerard's mind the whole time.

The girl slowly sat down and yawned. Gerard looked at her and smiled, then put on his shoes and stood up.

- "See you tomorrow, Joey."

- "Bye, Gerard."

taglist @all-tings-diego @worryd0ll

Do you wanna talk about this story, or be added to the taglist? send me a message here

#gerard way #matthew gray gubler #mgg #my chemical romance #babymetaldoll writes #mikey way #frank iero #ray toro #mcr fanfic #mgg fanfic

20 notes · View notes