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ahgasegotarmy116 · 1 year ago

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He Doesn't Deserve You | A Jeon Jungkook Series | Chapter One

Summary: Life didn't turn out the way you wanted. You got the guy, and the job but everything else you had ever wanted has been crumbling around you. Pairing: Noona reader x Jeon Jungkook (She's 28 and he's 22) Word Count: 2.1k~ Warnings: yändere, manipulation, domestic violence, self harm, cheating, explicit language, hints at smut, angst, idk what else lol a/n: Ahh thank you so much for all of the love so far on the intro and even all the notes on the masterlist hehe. I'm really loving the direction this story is going in so I hope you guys will too! And thanks again to @kkusadmirer for the request!

Opening my laptop I pull up the most recent edit I had done on the next chapter I was working on.

I'm a writer, not an incredibly famous one but a writer nonetheless. I make enough to get by and I'm able to work from home so that's all I ever really wanted. Just a silly girl, writing her silly stories, living her silly life.

But unfortunately things don't always turn out the way you want them to.

I thought I had it all, perfect grades and a perfect boyfriend with a loving family and a bright bright future. Now looking back at it all and seeing all of the stuff in the background that I somehow missed just makes me feel foolish.

How could I not notice Taehyung wondering eye? Why did I not listen to what my friends used to say about him? Why did I leave all of my friends behind for him?

Being so wrapped up and so in love with him I didn't even notice the fact that my family was falling apart. My mom cheated on my dad and I never knew until they told me they were getting a divorce.

While my brother was struggling in high school while being around all of their screaming and fighting and finally got committed to a mental institution when he had a psychotic break.

I never knew anything about that. It's not like I didn't care, but I just never really reached out or gave them enough time to reach out to me.

I was always like 'Oh Tae just got home I have to go' or 'Tae is expecting me so I need to get going'. My world has revolved around him for so long that my family and friends feel like strangers.

How could I have been so stupid and neglected them, all for one guy?

The one that I wanted to build a future with and promised to do the same with me. Now here I am, 24 with student loans up to my neck and a sorry excuse for a marriage with a husband that is never home.

I don't know what I managed to do in my past life that ended up royally fucking me up in this one but I'm sorry. Why couldn't I have done better so I would be saved from having my spirit broken and my heart ripped to shreds.

The only positive thing is that this has given me is the inspiration to come up with an even more fucked up series of books that has been my only source of income for the past few years.

Years, wow.

Thinking about how much time has passed and how things went to shit so quickly helped me continue down this downward spiral and I don't know how to make it stop. Although the sound of keys jingling outside the front door is my rude awakening, my brain knowing I need to be conscious of what may happen next.

I quickly wipe off the tears that I didn't even realized had started to fall and clear my throat. Moments later I'm met with the sight of Taehyung walking in wearing the same shirt I had seen him in yesterday but sports a brand new hickey near the collar, just barely noticeable but he makes no effort to hide it.

"Y/n" I hear him call out, breaking me out of my train of thought. "Yes?" I question, hating that I've been caught off guard even though I was staring right at him. "I asked if we have anything to eat" he says, making his way over to the refrigerator, now going to see if he can answer his own question before I'm even given another second to speak up.

"Um yeah I think there's some left over pizza from last night" I say and get up to walk towards him. "So how was work yesterday?" I ask tentatively, still not sure what kind of mood he's in. "Exhausting but it is what it is I guess" he says while stuffing his face full of a cold slice of pepperoni pizza.

I turn to walk away while nodding my head, not bothering to ask anything else since it seems from his vague answers that he's not in the mood to talk.

"Hey" he says, gently grabbing my wrist with the hand that wasn't occupied with the pizza, leaving me frozen in place. I know better than to walk away from him. Even if he's not mad at the moment doesn't mean that he won't be in the next.

"Where are you running off to?" he asks pulling me close by that same wrist. Still doing so carefully but pressing on the bruises that he had left there from the last fight we had.

He sees my slight look of discomfort and how my vision is trained on the wrist he's still holding and rolls up my sleeve, taking a quick look and seeing the evidence of his past transgressions.

"It left a mark huh?" he says examining the spot further and then bringing it up to his face where he places a few featherlight kisses on it, making a flash of heat run through my system when he looks back up at me with those eyes.

Those bedroom eyes that never fail to put me in a trance. He lifts his hand up towards my face and I flinch not knowing what to expect and see him stopping for a second, surprised by my reaction.

"Don't be afraid baby, it's just me" he says and keeps going, hooking his finger on the collar of my turtleneck to pull it to the side, no doubt searching for other marks.

"There's marks here too. I guess it's a good thing you stay home. Don't want to have to make up excuses for those now would you?" he says tapping under my chin twice, a slight lilt in his tone, enjoying my clear discomfort in showing them to someone, even if it's the person that's caused them.

"What did you do today baby?" he asks, letting go of me and going back to grab a few other things out of the fridge to complete his meal. "Oh you know, just some writing" I say, trailing off and giving him the same answer that I've given him time and time again.

"You almost done with it?" he questions, only really asking so he knows when my next big payday will be.

I shake my head "No, not yet. I think I'm only about halfway though" I say, giving simple answers to his simple questions. "Well you better get it out soon. I bet your readers are dying to know what happens next" he says giving me a quick wink before taking everything he has in his hands and carrying it over to the couch.

"Do you think you could grab me a beer?" he asks, but I know it's more of a courtesy than anything phrasing it like I actually had an option. I respond with a quiet yeah and bring it over to him, placing it on the coffee table.

"Thanks babe" he says and grabs a ahold of my hand and angles his head up, clearly asking for a kiss to which I oblige. Again something I don't really have an option in doing. "I missed you" he says and rubs his nose against mine cutely, or at least it used to be cute. Now it just makes me sad thinking of all of those times when we were happy.

"Are you gonna watch the game with me?" this time giving me something that I actually have a choice in. "I think I've got some more writing I'd like to do" I say and he nods his head not even bothering to look at me or give me a verbal sign of acknowledgment before turning on said game and slumping back into the couch to watch.

I walk over to my desk that happens to unfortunately be in the living room so I'm forced to grab my headphones to drown out the sound so I can hopefully get another chapter or two in before I call it a night.

~~~~~~

"Baby" I hear him call for me through my headphones after some time, that's something that I've had to fine tune. Making sure I can hear him when he talks to me no matter what so it's one less thing I have to worry about him getting upset about.

I pull out my headphones and turn my attention towards him, half expecting him to ask me to get him a beer. "Yes?" I reply, waiting to see what he needs. "Come here" he says holding his hand out to me and spreading his legs, showing me where he wants me.

I get up and walk towards him, straddling him once I get close enough and putting my arms around his neck. "Hi" he says in a deep voice sending a shockwave through my nervous system. "Hi" I respond quietly, intimidated at the thought of what he might do next. "How was the game?" I ask tentatively, hoping for my own sake that there was a favorable result.

"We won" he says, mindlessly tracing his hands up and down my curves. "How's your book?" he asks leaning into my neck, placing kisses over the bruises he had noticed from before. "

It's going" I whisper, starting to feel breathless from his warm breath fanning the sensitive parts of my skin. "Ready for a break?" he asks, question laced with a mischievous tone. I hum in acknowledgment, tilting my head to the side so he can have his fun.

~~~~~~

"I'm gonna head out but I'll be back later" Taehyung says while getting dressed with me still laying there with only a sheet to cover my body. "You're leaving?" I question, knowing he just said that but hoping he'll give me some sort of explanation.

"The guys wanted to meet up for a couple of drinks to talk about the game. Get some rest okay? I'll be back in a few hours" he says planting a soft kiss on my lips and one on my forehead.

I nod as he pulls the comforter over me as well, starting to already to drift off to sleep. "Stay safe" I mumble and flip over to the other side to try and get more comfortable.

He looks down at me for a second and chuckles at my fucked out and sleepy state before walking out of our bedroom and soon I'm left with the sound of him closing and locking the door behind him.

Although this night was bittersweet I'm thankful that it ended up like this. He's not a selfish lover when it comes to sex so I'm always left sleepy and satisfied except for the times that he's more rough, rough is putting it lightly so I guess I should say when he's more violent.

I hate thinking about those nights and I refuse to let those dark thoughts cloud this physical euphoric feeling I have but I can't help but worry about what he might actually be going out to do.

Would having a drink with the guys really make him want to leave his naked and freshly fucked wife alone in his bed? I just don't get it. If he's already been with me tonight could there be a possibility that he would wake up in another woman's bed and leave me waking up alone again tomorrow?

There's no use worrying about it though. It's not like it hasn't happened before, but why do I always let it get to me? Yes he's my husband but our marriage isn't like other ones in anyway shape or form. I'm here when he wants or needs me and that's it. I'm not allowed to want or need him because I'm just left disappointed every single time.

He doesn't love me, he just loves what I can give him and I need to come to terms with that. But it's nights like these where he's gentle and whispers sweet nothings in my ear that make me second guess things.

Maybe he's changed? Maybe he's realized what actually matters? And maybe I'm just getting my hopes up. I can't keep lying to myself but I don't know what else to do. I feel alone most days but these little glimmers of hope are what keep me holding on and unfortunately that's all I have left.

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mrghostrat · 1 year ago

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hello sir!!! first of all, i need you to know i am Obsessed with the streamer au it lives in my brain 24/7!!! (if u saw me binge-liking every single post in the tag no u didnt) i love having continuously updating fics to read so ive been eating up every single chapter so far rahhh i love it sm!!! also hello ur art is absolutely gorgeous ur amazing <3

second of all, i had this thought in my brain and i needed to share... what if like . over the years aziraphale and crowley have developed this game of just...playing very silly and innocuous pranks on each other (they start keeping score for best pranks and bicker over points every time). then one time, when aziraphale manages to convince crowley to do a baking stream with him, crowley just fuckin Slams His Fist in the bowl of ingredients like ha :) got u and aziraphale is just #smilingthruthepain

(naturally i had to draw it too please accept this as my offer to this perfect au. also yes i am a firm believer in the silly apron agenda!!!)

hi there! this is everything to me!

#im foaming at the mouth excuse me #aziraphale has to walk away when crowley starts chanting 'are you close'#ineffable streamers #good omens #ineffable husbands #gomens #also im holding your head in my arms im cradling u #ask a rat

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wildemaven · 9 months ago

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fall apart, again : chapter four | joel miller

pairing: joel miller x ofc!genevieve word count: 3156 content warning: 18+ blog; heavy angst, child loss, talk of death, talking about Sarah, heavy emotions, grief, fluff, vague talk about being with other people while married (but neither know the other was alive/nocheating), reader has a name but has zero descriptive features, reader is wearing some of Joel's clothes, no age given but is within a couple of years of Joel, if l've missed anything please let me know notes: oh look what I managed to whip up! Joel was on the brain and I was thinking of these two so I just let things flow- needed a break from Dave I guess. Big thank you to @gnpwdrnwhiskey for her continued support and help as I worked through this— love you!! This writer supports Palestine and does not share or support the views of tlou creator. series masterlist | previous | next

Contentment blooms somewhere deep within you. It fills in every fractured part of you that’s been lost and forgotten for so long. It brings a sense of peace, a feeling that you’ve searched for through bleak and uncertain times.

There’s a twinge of guilt that starts to prick at you, shame at how quickly familiarity has settled in. Less than 24 hours ago, your life had shattered on that hillside. Leaving you broken and left to figure out how to move forward with little hope of ever finding placidity of any sort. Only to seemingly be put back together after stepping foot into this new place, reacquainted with your old life. For it to be ripped apart again.

You decide to focus on the stillness that bleeds through the morning air. Focus on how sleep came with ease as you settled into bed, far easier than it should have— has been for years. Focus on the way the sunlight catches the tiny dust particles that have been floating in front of the bedroom window for the last hour, each one on its own lofty path. Focus on the warmth that radiates from Joel as he still sleeps soundly next to you. His body instinctively found yours in the night— after all this time, he still fit perfectly against you.

Joel. Your Joel. Alive and here with you.

Your mind tries to replay every detail that has led you to this conclusion, replaying that reunion over and over. A happenstance of pure luck that you’re here, laying in the arms of your husband.

A second chance? But why? Even as you will yourself to revel in the beauty of reconnecting with Joel, your heart still fights to grieve— Steve… Sarah.

“Whatcha dream about?” A question you haven’t heard in two decades, Joel’s voice low and laced with sleep as his lips brush over that little spot behind your ear.

It transports you back to a time where mornings together were sacred and unhurried. The sun barely pours through the opening in the curtains, still enough darkness to remain entangled and unbothered by the day's menacing agenda. Joel’s warm body spooning you from behind, his leg anchored between yours, a heavy arm securing you to him.

Whatcha dream about? Was his good morning-love you-how did you sleep? He’d listen intently as you spoke about the wild imagery that filled your mind through the night. Whether it was a silly little blip of a dream or some drawn out story that had you dissecting its meaning far longer than your mornings allowed, Joel was fully invested. Humming along as he absorbed the details, only interrupting in the form of feather light kisses he strategically placed on the little spot behind your ear, the crook of your neck and slope of your shoulder.

In turn, you always asked him the same. What dreams graced Joel Miller's brilliant mind? And he always responded the same, I don’t need to dream when I have you.

“About that one summer, I think Sarah was 8, maybe 9. We decided to have that barbecue, and invited all the neighbors over.” Joel’s nose gently slides over your ear, his forehead resting against the side of your head. “Sarah was in heaven with that slip n slide she begged us to get once the heat finally hit. We had to beg all the kids to take a break so we could fill them up with hotdogs and chips— then they were right back at it again. I remember a few of them cried when their parents told them it was time to leave, but Sarah being so sweet told them they could come back again the following weekend.”

Joel’s arm tightens around you as you talk, soaking in the memory he so vividly remembers. Sitting together on the blanket you had laid out on the lawn, tucked into his side as you both sipped on ice tea while you watched Sarah and the remaining few neighborhood kids, hyped up on soda and popsicles, splashing down the plastic water slide until the sun finally dipped below the back fencing.

“That was the same weekend Tommy thought he was invincible. Made it a whole two slides before he was hollerin’ like a baby and I was drivin’ his dumbass to the urgent care.” You can feel Joel grinning as he recalls his own recollection of that day, little puffs of air hitting your neck followed by a singular kiss— his lips hesitate briefly, lingering just enough to not make you uneasy, but enough to convey the love he still holds for you.

“Yeah— I can’t remember if it was the blonde or the redhead he was trying to impress that time. He got her number either way,” you add on. Joel’s light hearted laugh doesn’t go unnoticed, you smile at the sound as a single tear plunges into existence, rolling down your cheek and falling to the cotton pillowcase below.

Tommy.

“Tommy—“ You gasp, your stomach drops at the notion of Joel losing his brother. Turning in his arms so you're facing him, Joel’s eyes fluttering open at the sensation of you lightly brushing over his patches of grey whiskers . “Tommy. I— he’s…”

“He’s alive.” Joel’s expression is soft as he says it, his heavy lids lifting to take all of you in, grateful that this wasn’t some ruthless dream his mind was torturing him with.

“What— Tommy’s alive? Where is he?”

“Here. He’s kind of in charge— always wanted make a name for himself somehow. Him and Maria actually put this whole place together.” His heart nearly gives out seeing your face light up.

Joel takes advantage of the proximity, really taking in every detail of you in this morning light. He’s not surprised how even as the world shifted into darkness, you still managed to emerge into this season of life so gracefully. Noting how so much of you has changed, in gradual ways he wishes he could have witnessed first hand, but you’re still you— even more beautiful than he remembered.

“Maria— She’s Tommy’s wife?” You ask, softly laughing as your mind begins to connect the dots to when she had mentioned you would be staying in her brother in law's house and elated Tommy had found himself such a strong woman to settle down with.

“Yeah. Maria invited us over for dinner— whenever you feel up to it.

“Mmhmm. Yeah, I’d like that.”

You watch your fingers trace over Joel’s golden skin, still soft but slightly matured with age. Their curiosity produces tiny goosebumps as you reacquaint yourself with each tiny freckle and ridges of his chest.

Joel’s own fingers dance over the hem of the shirt you're wearing. There’s hesitation at first, bloodshed and sacrifice embedded into every creased line, every rigid callus he’s collected. The weight of them is too rough and repulsive to share with you. But you don’t notice the way they’re marked with flaws gained through surviving and enduring. His progress becomes less reluctant as he soothes over the sliver of exposed skin on your hip, resisting his own temptation actively burning through him.

“Did you and Tommy come here together?”

“We went to find you, but the hospital was empty by the time we got there— just assumed, you not bein’ there meant that you were…” Dead. “We left Texas, eventually made our way up north to the Boston QZ— taken in by Tess and her crew— had us smuggling. Tommy being Tommy, was fed up with it, you know how he gets. So he left, joined the Fireflies before finding Maria and settling here.”

It’s condensed. Leaving out how the obscure nature of this world had hardened him into a depleted shell of a man. He knows it will eat away at him, keeping it from you. Though for the time being, it’s a burden he’s willing to carry.

“We kept in touch for some years after through the radio but then he stopped contactin’ me. Tess n’ I decide to go find him— how we got the girl.”

“Ellie?” You pull your head back and settle onto your pillow, watching as Joel’s face morphs through a multitude of emotions as he speaks.

“Yeah, Ellie. After Tess— she was bit— I had to save who I could and keep movin’. We finally made it here, Ellie and I. She’s a spitfire that girl. I was such an asshole to her too, but she never gave up on me— think she saved me more than she realizes.”

“Ellie mentioned her yesterday, Tess. You two were— partners?”

“We— she and I were— we—“ Joel finds it hard at this moment to put an exact label on what they were, especially when explaining it to you, his wife.

It’s evident Joel harbors the same guilt as you. The two of you navigating a new life apart, your hearts seeking refuge in this destroyed world. You can see it, the shame slowly stitching its way into Joel’s features. How it pains him to verbalize it to you. To admit to something that in a different setting, your old life with him, would rip you apart.

“Joel, it’s fine— whatever you both meant to each other. We were apart, not knowing the other was alive. You don’t have to explain anything to me.” You pause briefly. You let your own words sink in. Steve still heavily in your peripheral thoughts.

This is your chance to start over, to be happy— do that for me?

Steve’s last moments with you, a premonition of sorts. This is your starting over. Here. Back together with Joel. A man you’ve held in your heart during the darkest of times for so long.

“There was— I wasn’t alone either.” Joel's quiet but lends you his full attention, giving you the impression you don’t need to explain or justify anything either. “He was bit right before we got here.”

“I’m sorry.”

There’s a lull in the conversation. The room is quiet as you both bask in each other’s touch. The inevitable of what’s been left unsaid hanging over you both like an ominous cloud of dread. Joel is already preparing himself for what you’re expecting to hear. Your heart prepares itself for the inevitable of what you want to know.

You swallow the lump that’s settled in your throat. “Was she here— did Sarah come here with you?” Your fingers stilling over a familiar scar on his shoulder that you’ve traced over a hundred times in the past.

“Eve— we don’t have to talk about this today.” Not really sure if it’s for your benefit or his— perhaps both.

“Joel— please.” Your voice cracks ever so slightly, lifting your gaze to his, tears already burning your lash line.

He falters. Considering the caliber at which you have lost already, his heart begins to construct walls. Solid and impervious to the reality that’s haunted him for so long. Locking it away as he always does, suppressing the pain over and over. But as you look at him with your eyes glossed over, ignoring the subject isn’t an option anymore. Not with you. Not with the woman who gave him his purpose, his life— his babygirl.

“No. She didn’t.” He releases a heavy sigh. “She— it was the first night of the outbreak—“ His voice trails off when he sees you’ve figured out the rest, nodding as your own tears silently overflow.

Joel’s breath hitches. Reliving the incident through your eyes has what is left of his heart shattering against his chest.

Fail her. Again and again.

You feel it in your bones. A hurt so deep it feels unbearable. Beyond any capacity you think you can handle. It splinters and forks out, penetrating every layer of your being.

Joel wraps his arm around you, seeking a closeness he’s longed for in your arms.

You cling to him desperately. Trembling as your hearts fuse together, reinforcing a love that’s managed to withstand lost time. Picking up where you both left off— 21 years ago.

It’s some hours later. Tears dried and breathing settled. The heat radiating from the window warms the bedroom a few degrees above the morning chill.

Shuffling coming from downstairs wakes Joel. Pots and pans clanging about, alerts Joel that Ellie’s grudge against him was short lived, for now at least, especially since it seems as though hunger has struck. He knows he’ll have to face her sooner than later, snuff out any remaining teenage rage still actively smoldering.

A glimmer of light refracts off the window pane, collecting in the tiny diamond nestled in the center of the ring on your left hand that’s resting on his chest.

It draws him in. Like a moth to a lit flame, mesmerized by the sight, needing to consume its beauty wholly. His fingers fidget with the dainty gold band, again struck by how you still felt compelled to hold true to the vows you both shared, evident in the way you're still wearing it.

Joel’s contemplation of the ring pulls you from the edge of sleep. The stammering of his heart, wavering somewhere between a nervousness or exultant leveled rhythm, is the first sound you audibly recognize as your eyes take in the rest of the room.

“You’re still wearing it.” Joel's voice rumbles through his rib cage against the walls of his chest.

“Hmm?” Your sleep addled mind absorbing and deciphering to its best ability.

He lifts your hand, thumb running over your most treasured possession. Your fingers splay out above where you both still lay in Joel’s bed, cotton sheets kicked away, neither of you willing to let go of the other.

“Yeah— kept me going when I didn’t have any reason to.”

The watch still wrapped around his wrist doesn’t go unnoticed. Its face no longer resembles the pristine condition it once had. The arms frozen in place. A time forever displayed as such. The cause of its destruction is not of importance right now— another time.

“Wait— I have something.” It’s all you say before you extract yourself from Joel’s arms. “My bag.”

Joel sits up alongside you, pointing to the corner of the room. Your tattered leather bag slumped on the floor next to the wooden dresser.

Your tired legs carry you to your belongings on the other side of the room. The floorboards cool beneath your feet during the short distance it takes to grab the bag and haul it back to the bed where Joel rests propped against the headboard. The mattress dips as you climb back in, reclaiming the space next to him.

Joel watches as you sift through the opening, in search of something hidden within the bag’s contents, in a spot only known to you.

A small smile breaks across your face the second your fingers clasp around the small item.

“I made it back to the house after some time— had to see if I could find you. It was sitting in its usual spot in our bedroom. It’s been with me ever since.”

Your fingers slowly unfurl, revealing a simple gold band resting in your palm. “I believe this belongs to you.”

Everything stills as you watch Joel take in the sight of his wedding. Find it hard to discern what he’s feeling at this moment. His relaxed features now clouded by sadness and confusion, causing you to second guess your intentions for wanting him to have it back at this time.

“It’s okay if you don’t want it right now— or ever. I know this is all still a lot to take in for both of us. So I understand if you don’t. I just—“

“No— No, Eve. I do. I definitely do want it.”

It fits back where it was intended to be with ease. The metal intense the second it makes contact with your skin, Joel’s large hands cradling your face as he delivers a gentle kiss of gratitude to you.

“Thank you. For keeping it safe for me.” He says softly against your smile. “Forever mine.”

“Forever yours.”

Joel’s moving about, pulling clothes from over stuffed drawers, dressing himself for the day. You're occupied on the edge of the bed, unpacking the remaining items from your bag in preparation to find permanence in this space Joel calls home. He’d mentioned the idea of you living here with him, giving you the option of taking his room for yourself while he camped out in the living room, which you turned down immediately. You had just gotten him back, and you wanted it to stay that way. So you agreed to stay permanently in his room, under the condition that he would be in it too.

The bed shifts when Joel sits next to you, groaning as he leans down to pull on and lace up his scuffed work boots.

“What all you got in there?” Joel’s focus oscillates between you and his hands working at his worn laces, watching you empty 21 years worth of life that’s been crammed into the small space.

“Pad of paper, a few books, some maps, some first aid equipment, a change of clothes that desperately needs to be cleaned.” He listens to you intently, the bag deflating as you pull each item, inspecting it then strategically organizing them on the bed for the time being, glancing over when you hear Joel chuckling as you rattle off one thing after the next. “Some other random things I’ve collected over the years.”

Everything accounted for, you toss your bag to the side. It hits the floor with a muffled thud in front of Joel’s boots. You miss the small folded paper that slips onto the patterned rug that lays beneath the bed.

“This somethin’ of importance?” Joel asks, hold the paper between two fingers.

“Not sure. Might just be some trash.” Taking it from him, promptly unfolding it for further consideration.

It’s a letter. Not one of your own, although it’s directly addressed to you. Your eyes flit over every word. Then once more. And then again. Picking up on key words each read through.

Eve… Genevieve… Jackson… Radio… Joel… Bit… I’ll be waiting for your letter… I love you…

“What is it?” Joel’s hand settles on your thigh, your silence slowly becoming worrisome as you stare at the paper, its edges crinkled in your grip.

“Joel— what’s your job here?” Your voice cracks in the air.

“Patrol mainly. Took over the radio sometime ago. Help out here and there— wherever I can. Why?” His thumb strokes over your leg, a subtle mixture of coaxing and grounding, equally preparing himself for whatever it is that you’ve just happened upon.

Each droplet hits the paper with a sharp plunk.

Plunk. Plunk. Plunk.

The words blurring, squeezing your eyes shut tightly, releasing the tears all at once.

Plunk. Plunk. Plunk.

“Eve— what is it?”

“You helped guide Steve and I here—“

#joel miller #joel miller x you #joel miller x original character #joel miller x ofc #pedro pascal #fall apart again series #Joel x Genevieve #wildemaven writes #pedrostories #tlou au

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exactlycleverpirate · 11 months ago

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Rafayel's Birthday Card Thoughts

Spoilers under the cut.

So, I feel like we get some useful information thanks to the existence of this photo.

To summarize, Rafayel had a Lemurian art teacher when he was a kid that had collected various surface world items as inspiration for painting, including this photo. Rafayel wasn't satisfied with the photo, and wanted to see the surface world himself. His teacher ratted him out to his parents, and he got grounded. But when they let him out for his birthday, he snuck away towards the surface, just far enough to put his hand above the surface of the water.

I feel like this confirms a few things on timing for me. The photo is described as being slightly old. Photos have only been around since the 1800s, and this photo doesn't sound like it is that old. More like the kind of old that childhood photos would be to an adult. I think this confirms that Rafayel lived in Lemuria underwater as a child with other Lemurians sometime in the last 20 or so years. So I think he really is about 24 in this life.

This also confirms my thoughts that the events of Louis' tale in Anecdote 3 about the slaughter of the Lemurians is recent history, i.e. current Rafayel's childhood. They were in hiding from humans, and Rafayel at least (possibly other Lemurian children as well) was not allowed to go to the surface world, which we already know Rafayel ignored on multiple occasions (See Nightly Stroll and Whalefall Lament).

This is also the second time we have seen Rafayel call Lemurian adults liars. He had thought his family that gave him the Whale Call in Whalefall Lament were liars (he was wrong, the Whale Call worked as they said). He also says his teacher was a liar for saying Lemurians couldn't survive on land, citing himself as an example of a Lemurian surviving on land. So he has some resentfulness/distrust of the older generation of Lemurians.

As a child, he desperately wanted to escape his Lemurian home for the surface world. Now he lives on the surface, but his home has been destroyed, and he can never go back. And probably most of those adults he fought with/resented are now dead, including his parents.

I also think this all makes it more likely that the pinky promise memory we see in chapter 7 happened in this life, instead of a previous one.

On a silly note:

"Wish I could be part of your woooorld!"

#love and deepspace #rafayel love and deepspace #love and deepspace rafayel #rafayel #l&ds rafayel #lnd rafayel

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genericpuff · 11 months ago

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I dont think snailords is literally going to end the series in 20 episodes. I think he is plotting the rest of the season and has the option to extend it 10 or 20 episodes.

That's not what he implies in his post, though, at all. The wording is very clear:

He's not saying "I have the ending for Death : Rescheduled planned out but I have this one mini arc I want to do before it", he's literally saying "the comic is ending whether you like it or not, but if you give me $1k I'll make sure it's 20 weeks from now instead of 10." He doesn't say he's plotting out the end which is however far from now, he just goes straight into "I'm gonna end the comic in either 10 episodes or 20". And then of course even goes to say "decide whether you want 20 more weeks with Kissae and Kreyul, or 10 more weeks to say goodbye". If he didn't want to give his readers the impression that that meant it was ending within that time range... then why phrase it like that? It doesn't help either that his phrasing is supported by his updates, where he says shit like:

(Also I couldn't find them but there are other screenshots out there of him saying shit like "thanks for showing you love the series" in a way that's frankly rude af because it's basically like he's asking for money for his readers to 'prove' they love him and his work, and that wouldn't be the first time he's done that either.)

If he is saying what you're suggesting, then he's not being clear about it at all because the language is very seriously implying that it's going to be ending when it returns. Which I'd hope it isn't considering what other readers are pointing out that the story has basically just gotten going and I'd hate for this to turn into another Freaking Romance situation, but I don't know how else we're supposed to read "

And, as I mentioned in my post about it, why on earth even contemplate putting in this mini arc that he's asking for $1k as a deciding factor over if he doesn't even have it written? He says he's way more confident just writing the finale arc as is, so why drag it out with an arc he's not completely confident in?

And of course, there's the urgency. If Death : Rescheduled isn't entering its ending arc after it returns from midseason hiatus - if it still has potentially years of storytelling left - then why now? Why suddenly ask your readers to buy $1k worth of merch in 24 hours or less to help you make a decision... if the actual consequences of that decision won't be made apparent for ages?

And at the end of the day, even if it's a possibility he meant what you're suggesting, that doesn't make it any less scammy to hold the comic's potential ending for ransom? Speaking as a comic writer myself of the last 10+ years, getting money from the audience in this kind of way has never ever been a deciding factor in how I write my work. Sure, things like stretch goals and Patreon milestone rewards are a thing, offering bonus chapters or NSFW art or just additional goodies if you hit a financial goal or if people sign into a certain tier, all that makes sense, but if what you're offering is worded specifically to make your audience panic - not saying "hey , you guys get an extra bonus 10 episodes if I hit this goal by this date" but rather "hey, you guys won't get AS MANY episodes if you don't pay me $1k in 24 hours or less" - and ultimately gets your readers an extra 10-15 episodes of an arc you're not even confident in writing ... the fuck is that, even? Just write the story you want to write, why do you gotta make your audience freak over not getting as much comic as they might want only to twist it into "surprise, it was for charity!" in the end?

The whole thing is silly and yeah, I'm calling it for what it is - a scam - because it's not the first time Snailords has taken advantage of his audience and played on their emotions and need for short-term gratification all for his own financial benefit. It's not even the first time he's tanked his own comic from rushing the ending simply because he was done playing with it. So at this point I wouldn't be surprised if the comic does come back and proceeds to spend 10-15 episodes waffling on a directionless mini arc before rushing into a 10 episode finale.

That said, that's all my two cents on it, you don't have to agree with me. I really don't feel like I'm misinterpreting his words but maybe someone else could enlighten me if there's something I'm missing here; that said, considering even his own readers were calling him out on this and that he never actually made efforts to clarify what could be poor language, I don't think I'm an outlier and I don't think there's even any misinterpretation happening. Maybe he'll prove me wrong, but I've yet to see this guy do anything to prove that he's capable of doing the right thing. And frankly, even if what you suggested turns out to be true and the comic goes on for a long while before actually hitting that $1k-funded mini arc (and again, I kinda hope it does just so we don't end up with a repeat of what happened with Freaking Romance) it doesn't make any of this feel less gross IMO.

#snailords #webtoon critical

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thegamingcatmom · 1 month ago

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Hi :B Yk what was I thinking? Of how MC would be freezing her tits off in Alaska and how she'd spend her days in the house wrapped in a blanket 24/7 (bonus points if they are at the point that shes totes into the sisters so she can use THEIR blankets so it has their scents) and cuddling by the fireplace while watching smth silly on TV ignoring the chaos happening in the kitchen as Momma bear Carmen tries to teach one of the sisters how to make hot chocolate for the cold hooman. ❤️❤️

Mkay bye 🫣

Hellaw <3

Funny you mention cold, considering about...65,8(ish)% of Chapter 4 consists of MC complaining about/trying to come to terms with the fact she´s been dragged to the fucking North Pole, lol. (At least as far as she´s concerned.)

Listen, all I´m saying is-

Fur.

From the animals she hunted herself, of course.

Mostly bears.

Draped over her bed.

You were buried beneath them, sleeping without a care in the world.

Something deep within her, something primal, purred at the sight.

Especially considering you were butt naked.

Her doing, of course.

One of your legs was peeking out - tempting her, mocking her.

Her eyes were locked onto it.

She was struggling.

Struggling to keep herself from running her fingers along the smooth expanse of skin.

It was ridiculous, considering she just had you.

More than once.

It was ridiculous that it still felt forbidden.

Probably because it was.

...Technically.

Crackling noises filled the room.

The fireplace roared, bathing the room in a soft, amber glow.

Making the view so much more tantalizing.

...Fuck it.

Unable to resist any longer, her hand reached out, the tips of her fingers just about to make contact-

You let out a soft snore before your leg - regrettably - disappeared beneath layers of thick, brown fur.

Probably for the better.

Her sister would be returning soon.

She would have to shower.

So would you.

Had to change the sheets too.

Spray something that would cover up the last bit of evidence.

Regrettably.

But needed.

Her room reeked of it.

She loved it.

She loved-

Right.

I have no idea what just happened, to be frank.

I am but an instrument to my mind´s whims.

I also realize this turned out a lot less wholesome than you were probs hoping/expecting??

I´m sorry.

(Not really.)

Hot Chocolate is awesome though. ♨️🍫

Thanks for your ask! 💋

#tumblr asks #twilight #the twilight saga #the denalis #denali coven #denali sisters #tanya denali #kate denali #irina denali #at SOME point in The Bumpy Road Home probs #formerly The Sisters

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lizardperson · 1 month ago

Text

lizardwriting wrapped 2024

because this whole thing deserves a little yearly review too...

after not writing anything for the public in sooo many years, i actually wrote quite a lot this year. only had to overcome the initial feeling of "cringe omg i can't post that 😬", and now have lost all shame and am enjoying myself immensely, subjecting the world to my bullshit. i think i actually improved quite a bit over the whole year.

AO3 STATS [link]

28 works 48,102 words total 18x ocworld: 17 short bits + 5 chapters Dark Lights, Shine Loud 7x fallout: 6 of those Courier Mika including 20 oneshot chapters Come All Sufferers (#fnv au) 2x star trek disco

---

SPOTLIGHT some points stolen from this list

.characters i thought most about: mika - light of my life, bane of my existence. the ultimate blorbo from my brain, bouncing around in there 24/7. she's terrible and i love her so much. (#mika tag) gabriel - grew SO MUCH this year, mostly thanks to the silly little fallout au. i have a lot of thoughts but not enough words. i love him so much. (#gabriel tag) special mention: fiona - what started out as daria's nameless dead backstorywife somehow turned into an actual character that has been living in my brain now extensively. little miss tortured poet. i love her. (#fiona tag)

.favorite title And there are days like this, too because it's the perfect throwback to the kinda-first part 4261 days. and i wasn't even the one who came up with it, that was @voidthing special mention: The Hills Have Eyebots. because it's just funny.

.favorite opening line

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Mika cursed when her can of energy drink let out the familiar hiss of danger. Despite her best efforts and a few quick sips, she still managed to spill some of it on herself and the couch. Great, another point for Nic's long list of things to be pissed about. As if the general mood in this apartment hadn't been shitty enough those last few weeks. Oh well, let her bitch then. [Dark Lights, Shine Loud]

is it my best line? nah, far from it. is it the perfect introduction to Mika? hell yea - cursing, consuming caffeine, and making a mess. what more do you need to know lmao. i just really like that one, still. the whole first chapter, actually.

.favorite piece of dialogue

"You didn't answer my question - you think we're doing the right thing here?" "Yes." There was not a bit of doubt in his voice. "You believe in our stupid plan?" "I believe in you." [Doing The Right Thing]

just sums up the whole fallout au and their dynamic so well, and also *clutches chest*

special shoutout to the close second, the "I'm not a lesbian" bit in In Whiskey Veritas

and another special shoutout to the last bit of Left My Heart In The Sierra Madre because. T_T

.favorite ending line

Falling in love with her best friend was such a bad idea, July thought, and yet she didn't know how not to. [Viola sororia]

it's so sappy. but 🥺🥺🥺

close second for a completely different vibe:

Freud would probably have something to say about distracting yourself from your shitty mother by sleeping with a woman roughly that same age. Good thing Freud was dead. [Mommy issues]

.favorite text overall 4261 days i still think this is the best thing i've written. for someone who does not have particularly much experience with grief in general, i really really like writing a lot about it somehow...

---

OUTLOOK 2025

the big multi chapter thingies are very far up my to do list, but yknow how it is with adhd brains - ohhh lets do that quick short text first, and that one, and that one *procrastinates the big ones*

BUT that is the plan:

. finally getting some more chapters into Dark Lights, Shine Loud. there are a bunch lying around as first drafts, but they still need some work. soonTM

. continuing the way-too-ambition plotheavy heistthing What Happens In Reno, Stays In Reno after those first few intro chapters. this requires an extensive brainstorming session to get the actual plot hammered together.

. the shiny new wip that i am itching for (because shiny and new), because it's gonna be a bit different in various ways so that makes it excitingTM

....and of course just continuing to write, overall. gonna keep my #fff streak up.

---

SPECIAL THANKS

@voidthing for basically being my secret co-author. always improves the quality by SO MUCH and is the bestest anyway 💕💕💕

the whole @flashfictionfridayofficial community - turns out a regular thing is really good to get a habit going, and also y'all are so nice and cool and just 💕💕💕

everybody who reads my stuff of course :D yes, i mostly write for myself, but of course it's always awesome if someone else likes my bullshit 🙏

#lizardwriting #lizardwrapped

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tavyliasin · 22 days ago

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2024 Writing Retrospect

Tagged by @jellymellydraws so I'll give it a go!

What's been your biggest learning point this past year? There are very few things I can't/won't write if I put my mind to it, I just need to find the right angle - I've found a lot of joy in writing crackships, one shots, and rare pairings. I do adore my longer stories, but digging in to new dynamics never fails to be exciting and I'd like to lean on that some more~

How has your writing developed this past year? I think I'm a lot more confident in writing, particularly kink, and I'm easing my way out of some bad habits like sentences that are far too long or being too vague when my mind wants to skip through the most exciting parts~

Bad writing habits? Hmmm I'm going to have to throw in getting distracted, not finishing WIPs, and definitely the impatience to post. I know works are better with a beta read, but that means waiting and editing and re-reading instead of just slamming it down, throwing the links into every corner of the internet, and running away in fear and horror that nobody wants what I just put out. Ah, there's another bad habit - the lack of confidence in finished works. I don't like looking at my stats, but I cherish every single individual comment and kudos like my entire creative career depends on it.

Favorite thing you wrote? Gods that's a tough one. I adore all of my works, and I wrote so much this year. It might be between the Raphael/Haarlep prequel pieces, and possibly Emperor x Volo "A Legend, Alive" which was a real experiment when I started it and it just developed so much depth and feeling as I took it entirely seriously~

Biggest win? Getting over 500k words published on AO3, over 100 works, and also finishing the 24 chapter speedwritten epic that was the Volo Kinkmas Challenge. Most of which barely a dozen people have even opened judging by the hit counts, but I shouldn't expect people to actively want to read 24 chapters of Volo smut without me begging them and yelling "hear me out, it's actually really good" about a thousand times a minute. (Seriously though I am proud of finishing it and I think I did a damn good job too, allowing myself that pride)

Goals for the new year? Write. The. Original. Novel. I did barely anything on it last year... I would also like to finish all 3 of my longfics, they've been going on too long without concluding, then I'll feel more free in starting new things or indulging in silly premise one shots~

Your favorite words of the year, aka the words you check each chapter for, making sure you didn't repeat them 788 times? "As". You can pry "as" from my cold dead hands, I need it, it works, I will use it plenty~ Otherwise I really just keep checking word repetition constantly. If I'm going over a piece and worry I've said a word too many times I will do a quick ctrl+F to highlight uses and see if I'm good or not. I prefer several paragraphs before a word repeats and open my thesaurus tab often~

What are you excited for in the new year? Creative events, finishing the other Zine pieces I've signed up for, and the release of Fan Zines I've been a part of - really excited to share those pieces with you all when they are released~

Tagging in - with no pressure, only if you'd like to - @morb-untamed @laserlope @khapikat222 @ineadhyn @redroomroaving

#writing fiction #writing ask game #writer's retrospective #q and a #fanfiction writing

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blackyote · 17 days ago

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Belated 2024 ao3 wrapped (that I actually typed up a couple days ago).

How many words have you written this year?

61,554! Over twice as many as I wrote in 2022, holy cow! (I don't have the tally for 2023.)

2. How many works did you publish this year?

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

Might be recency bias, but I want to say "Forget Me Not." It was a real labor of love for me to write that long of a one-shot, and I'm happy with it start to finish :)

4. What work of yours has the most hits?

"and we'll have a spring wedding" with 7,240 hits. I'm a bit surprised because I thought it would be "Seeing Ghosts."

5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

"Forget Me Not" got so many really really sweet comments from people who say they loved it T.T I didn't expect that kind of response.

6. Favorite title you used

"Ice Ice Baby" is so silly I have to love it. That's also the fic that took the longest for me to name lol

7. If you use song lyrics, which artist's songs did you pull from the most?

Only used three song lyrics and they were each from a different artist.

8. Pairing you wrote the most for this year?

Lulawlu

9. Favorite pairing you wrote for this year?

Also lulawlu. Hyperfixation go brrr.

10. What work was the quickest to write?

Hmm either "To Be Free" or "Have a Heart," which I think I wrote the bulk of in a sitting.

11. What work took you the longest to write?

"Ice Ice Baby" took me over two months which is a long time for me.

12. How many WIP's do you have in your docs for next year?

I have notes for Match My Freak and notes for my daemon AU.

13. What's your longest work of the year?

"Match My Freak" is at 12,771 words so far.

14. What's your shortest work of the year?

"To Be Free" at 810 words.

15. What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

"Match My Freak" because it will hopefully have another two or three chapters.

16. What's your most common "Additional Tags" tag?

Idk I don't think there was a ton of overlap.

17. Your favorite character to write this year?

Law. Love me a wet cat.

18. The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?

Luffy was tricky at first but I'm more comfortable writing him now. I wrote Doflamingo in one (1) scene and was sweatin' cuz I didn't want him to feel ooc.

19. What's one pairing you want to explore next year?

Idk really, we'll see where inspo takes me!

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most?

Naturally, I reread chunks of "Forget Me Not" and "Ice Ice Baby" just cuz of their length and how long it took to complete them.

21. How many kudos in total did you get this year?

Obviously I'm tallying these a little late but, including January thus far, 6,446 kudos :)

22. Which work has the most comments?

"Match My Freak" has 55 comment threads (multi-chapter privilege).

23. Did you do any collaborative works this year?

A number of my fics were based on pre-existing art, but I'm not sure that counts? "Forget Me Not" was a collab, though, because @sen-ya did art for the piece while I was writing it.

24. Did you write any gifts this year?

No, but there are a few I probably should've marked as gifts if I'd been thinking about it :x

25. Did you receive any gifts this year?

Second Wheel by disco_girl on my birthday :)

26. What's your most common category?

G then T

27. What do you listen to while writing?

(copy and pasting this answer) I can't really listen to music while writing. It's too distracting for me. But I like writing at coffee shops and stuff where there's background chatter.

28. Favorite work you wrote this year?

"Forget Me Not" but I really like "Hats Off" too!

29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

I didn't sit with this question long but I like this bit from "Seeing Ghosts":

Sanji was used to watching his step this early in the morning, before the sun rose and properly dried the planks still slick with condensation, but even the black leg couldn’t get it right every time. On the fourth step, the heel of his dress shoe slips from underneath him, sliding past the edge and hitting air. Arms flailing, he tries to catch his balance, but the overcorrection makes his other foot lose purchase beneath him—he’s going down. He prepares to catch himself with the palm of a hand, expecting at worst a bruised tailbone, but before he lands, Sanji feels a violent tug at his collar. Someone’s grabbing his suit jacket from behind.

And this from "It Takes a Village":

He slipped out, feeling proud of his work. And just in time, too, as Law returned to the Polar Tang just minutes later. The sun had brought some color back to his face, but he still looked tired and vacant, discussing logistics only briefly with Bepo before making his way down the corridor.

When he opened the door to his room, Law stopped dead in his tracks, taking a second to recognize the bright, tidily done space as the sad mess he had left behind. It didn't even smell the same: spice and citrus and clean linens met his nose when he breathed. He scanned his room once, twice, noting the books all in their place, the cleared floor, the meticulously made bed. In a daze, he drifted to his desk and sat in front of the meal left for him.

The love he felt for his brothers—the love they evidently felt for him—washed over him like a hug.

He hid his face and cried.

30. Biggest surprise while writing this year?

Finding out that I CAN write longer fics, even if it doesn't always come easily to me. Also, all the wonderful people I've met in the One Piece fandom!

#ao3 wrapped #my writing

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313i · 5 months ago

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i did the blorbo bingo with edling :3

ramble / explanations for my writing under cut!

for ling:

most fandom takes are incorrect: maybe it’s just me but ive seen a decent amount of people make ling out to be a pervert or just reduce him to a stupid silly character. ling yao is NOT A PERVERT! WHERE DID YOU GET THAT FROM! he would never even do HALF OF THE THINGS YOU GUYS ARE TALKING ABOUT!!!!!!!!!! and he is so far from just being a funny guy that makes the audience laugh. his motives and character as a whole are so incredibly strong and i’ve never been so fascinated with a character like ling yao. please give him more attention.

that also goes hand in hand w/ stop putting them in situations!!: he would not be looking up girls skirts or something 🙁 be kind to him i think he deserves the world also. the cast of fma consists of a bunch of 14-16 year olds who traveled across the world to fulfill what they feel is their destiny but they end up on a journey of pain and suffering instead. they are children they should be playing roblox and minecraft and brain rotting like me ……….. i need a 500 chapter fic of ling being happy and joyous and eating all the wonderful meat in amestris.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE NOT ENOUGH CANON / UNDERRATED: as much as i love greedling and understand the combo … i wish ling got more screentime alone separate from greed. he is really such an interesting and unique character with a banging design and sometimes i feel greed robbed him of his iconic features (his yellow jacket & sword) and people just forget that greedling exists because ling was strong enough to withstand the homunculus in his system + LING IS THE BODY!!! he is serving that facecard and body 24/7 because that’s all ling yao!!! i still do really like greedling because they have a lot of room for interaction but i feel like ling yao is one of the characters who is often forgotten when it comes to merch n whatnot. he’s not as much of a main character as ed of course but he is just forgotten!! he is really such a cool character i wish there was more of him everywhere

there’s probably a deep seated reason why i love him: yes. because he is me and i am him (not really). i just project onto him and he is just me at this point! i will forever be such a huge ling yao fan the first time i watched fmab i instantly got attached to him i am so happy he is alive. i hope being the king of the yao clan is treating him well though he didn’t look to happy in that one photo of him as emperor….. it’s a tough job so i get it man! i hope he explodes

for edling:

pretty privilege: they are both pretty. brotherhood art style is a bit inconsistent at times i feel but their designs are both so gorgeous (their colors complement one another!). and also the bloodhell episode. ling yao fighting envy with his cool sword and handsome face…. ed somehow still looking pretty despite all the traveling and fighting. they are pretty!!!

projection had entered the chat: well, yes! who doesn’t project onto their faves??? :p

don’t typically discuss irl because of fandom: more and more people nowadays seem to forget fma franchise as a whole 🙁 it makes me so sad because this series is so fire and i wish it would keep its popularity but it obviously makes sense that more relevant shows and animes will overtake its light. i’m also afraid most people don’t like edling (edling nation consists of like 10 people) so i just don’t really talk about fma irl at all! no one here has a Fullmetal heart..

everything else is just me wanting to bite them (lovingly) and stuff them in my pocket and hold them in the palm of my hands to show them off to the world. i do not actually want to plot their demise and i am not actively doing so. i would put them in a wood chipper in a loving manner

for ed:

has done nothing wrong: he’s innocent, your honor… everything he’s ever done has been for his family. he’s committed a huge taboo in the alchemy world by trying human transmutation but him and al just wanted their moms back. they were TOO YOUNG TO BE ORPHANS AND HAVE TO GROW UP WITHOUT THEIR MOTHERS LOVE! he ended up becoming a dog for the military but he had to do what he had to do to get closer to that philosopher stone… in 03 he did end up taking some lives too i think. he’s only 15 and never intended to Actually murder someone. seeing him after the greed scene is so incredibly heartbreaking. 03 and cos are such horrific renditions of fma (in a good way) and it makes me so sad to think that’s how he ended up??? he had so much hope as a little kid and was so full of life but by 18 he’s stranded from the last bit of family he knew and is left a depressed alcoholic who keeps losing people. edward elric has done nothing wrong..

there’s probably a deep seated reason why i love him: even from the outside HE IS SUCH A COOL CHARACTER. a character who canonical has prosthetic limbs is already so cool. knowing the story behind those limbs and his brother is so 🙁☹️☹️… his iconic red jacket!!! his LEATHER PANTS WITH HIS PLATFORM BOOTS? his striking gold eyes and bright blonde hair? how he wears his stupid pocket watch…. his dumbass belt… i love edward elric’s flamboyant style so much i’ve never seen a more bi-coded character ever. i love everything about his design and his personality is unlike most shonen anime protags and that adds to his charm. he is hot-headed and will bite your head off if you comment on his height or call him pipsqueak but he is still such a sharp and intelligent young man .. He is literally an Alchemy God…. he is so capable even at such a young age and carries himself so well because if i were him i would be breaking down crying every step of the way! he is dedicated and loyal to his cause of finding the philosophers stone to return their bodies back to normal and doesn’t even hinder once throughout the journey. he loves his brother dearly and it makes me so joyous to see a strong sibling relationship in this genre that isn’t Weird. Edward Elric is a fire character thank you for listening to my TedTalk

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stellar-constellations · 2 months ago

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Wattpad removed my “Heart on the Market” story because it “violated their guidelines.” Okay, but it was literally just a bit of murder, not even gory? IT HAD PLOT? I dunno, am I desensitized or something? The story has only been up for 24 hours and it got automatically deleted because of Wattpad’s guidelines. My “Star Patient” series was literally worse with more gore and disturbing elements, so why did this one get flagged?

I read the guidelines for Wattpad and it looks like my story didn’t go against any of their rules.

I put the story on mature audiences? Is there something I’m missing? Whatever it is, I’m appealing because I feel there’s something wrong. I’ve read far worse on Wattpad so I don’t understand…

I’m re-uploading the series when I wake up tomorrow and I’m sending an appeal to Wattpad.

Oh, and happy Thanksgiving y’all!

Edit: Guess who fixed it! I added a small introduction page as the first chapter. I think Wattpad automatically scans first chapters and if it sees something it doesn’t like, it flags and takes the story down. Since I did an introduction page, my story hasn’t been taken down! Silly Wattpad and their silly system.

#stellar constellations #send help #wattpad #andrew graves x reader #tcoaal andrew #andrew tcoaal #andy and leyley #the coffin of andy and leyley

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mari-lair · 2 years ago

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It’s wild when I see people say Aoi is written only to be Akane’s love interest, cause Akane never hid that he is her boy.

He goes the extra mile just for a hint of her attention and had given the classic childhood friend heroine speech of "I’ll love my crush even if they never look my way."

It's framed as a joke but he is genuinely happy as long as Aoi exist, he can enjoy his life and look forward to all his days no matter how shitty they are (Teru bullies him, the clock keepers work him dry, he gets rejected constantly, and so on,) as long as Aoi is alive and happy.

He is ridiculously easy to please when it comes to Aoi.

And while Aoi does loves Akane, visibly being affected by him: As seen by her possessive attitude, her wish to be closer to him, and the way his hard work influenced her, she doesn’t try or want her world to revolve around him.

Yes, she will cry and crumble if he doesn’t like her because she cares deeply, their relationship is a solid part of her character, but she has plenty of hobbies and plans without him, most of her problems are caused by herself or society's views and expectations of her, she wouldn’t do what Akane asks of her or change for him, not unless he is asking for something she also wants for herself.

Let’s compare how they talk about each other for a bit.

The only time Aoi talks about her feelings for Akane is in chapter 84, which is very far into the manga.

And this exposition shows her envious and insecure side, how she admires kindness and wishes she was as lovable: It shows a conflict that says as much about Aoi’s character as it does about Akane’s character.

Meanwhile, Akane consistently talks about her, and most of his expositions don’t offer any substance to his character, other than “he is in love”.

The only exposition that says as much about himself as it does about Aoi is the one in chapter 24, which shows he stalks her, and Aoi encourages it, since she trusts him, and unfortunately, she have been in need of constant protection from a young age:

Even when Akane explicitly says he’ll talk about himself.

He doesn’t.

He proceeds to spend the whole chapter talking about Aoi.

The only thing he says about himself in that entire rant is “I hate that part of you”, which he later admits was a lie, something that he used to have her stay and listen.

He isn’t just her boy, he has a life outside her, a very busy life.

As Aoi put it, “He works hard and is dutiful.” which mostly translates to ‘helpful and trust worthy’, so he is constantly seen giving other characters advise that works or making them snap out of their bullshit: He is the reliable one.

His classmates respect him , Teru trusts his judgement, and hell even Kou, who barely interacted with Akane had called him and not a close friend like Nene, when he felt powerless and needed help.

But no matter how seriously he may take his duties or want to help people, Akane has decided he was born to love and protect Aoi.

That’s his priority, always.

His only long term goals involve Aoi, he devoted all his heart and soul to her.

If she wanted Akane to change his style to clothes he would never wear on his own, or make him get into new hobbies, or tell him to score lower than her, he would do it right away: He is comfortable being her boy, he’ll throw his pride away with no hesitation for her and do anything to make her happy to an extreme even most ‘heroines’ I see wouldn’t cross.

The one thing Aoi made VERY clear despite never saying out loud is “Keep your eyes on me. Don’t flirt with anyone else.” and that’s a wish that Akane took to heart, to the point that he is the only character that stays ‘loyal’ to his love interest even on silly extra events, like the ‘kiss day’ arts.

Everyone else send a kiss, no matter if they have a love interest or not, since is just a fun little bonus.

Akane only starts to touch her when he is confident Aoi likes him too: When he assumes she wants him, before that he always kept a certain distance, understanding he ain’t entitled to shit just because they are childhood friends.

Akane is far from perfect, he can be selfish and self centered, his approach to help usually tactless, but at his core, he always seek to do what Aoi wants, no questions asked.

His devotion is extreme to the point of being unhealthy, but he isn’t lying or trying to please Aoi here: As long as she is alive, and enjoying life, he will be delighted doing any of the things she wants. Her best hairstyle in his eyes is always the one she chose to style, the best clothes are always the ones she wants to wear.

There is nothing he likes more than her. Or to make her happy.

Even what Akane loves to do the most, which is to gush about Aoi nonstop until he looks batshit insane, is something that she had encouraged and never complained, no matter how much it escalated, so he was convinced she loved the attention.

Once she is honest and admits she doesn’t like it, he immediately tries to drop it.

He still has an ‘I was born to love you’ mentally, he just stop putting on a show, or trying to make her heart flutter. Most of his displays of worry, affection, or ‘ill protect you’ became either quiet or casual.

...Still.

He can’t help but show his love loudly from time to time, he is cringe at heart, truly hopeless, but he is trying his best.

In short: Aoi is in desperate need for more character focus, but the one determined to make their life revolve around their love interest is clearly Akane.

#while everyone wait for the chapter to be translated here is a post to pass the time #akane aoi #aoi akane #aoikane #tbhk #toilet bound hanako kun #and yes i wrote this because of bad takes i saw on twitter #but also cause i'll take any excuse to talk about them #jibaku shounen hanako kun #jshk #tumblr i love you pls show it in the tags #character analysis

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