#changst

[cookiekat-blogz]

Changst canon

PSA:

if you write any Chase angst please label it changst from now on🙏

#1 cus deer mom said so

#2 it has been seconded and adopted and I third it so yes

[bloomyeu]

unfortunately waiting for us will be out saturday ! i started school this week nd have been so busy :[

changst might be put on hold but i’m not sure yet, depends how bad my work load gets and how busy i am on the weekends

sorry tho, i do have a life outside of tumblr so this blog isn’t rlly a priority but a way for me to express my thoughts and silly daydreams :]

but i hope u guys have enjoyed the fics this week 💓 i appreciate all the kind words 🐰

[dual-fantasy]

never apologise for sending chase angst ever. changst makes me think of chang from community but it fits. also you're so real this is incredible.

he has fainted a few times but he always hid them because that's lame and uncool of him. he has no idea how to take care of himself like at all, so he pushes himself way too far and ends up making his illness worse, which he then works through, which then gets worse, and keeps spiralling. noone at the beach house cares enough to try and help him because it helps make their content, so he never saw in issue with it.

I think chef is the first to notice that he's kinda fucking himself up by powering through his sickness, and once he brings it up everyone realises how sick he is. you're so real he cannot take care of himself to save his life (literally)

[evermorethecrow]

Chuuya angst Chuuyangst Changst

just some panels from one of my chuuya animatics

<3

[quiets-cradle]

pirate's legacy is an incredible song don't get me wrong but i have been cackling under my blankets reading the live chat go 'changst' and 'chipression' for its entire duration

[senseless-septic-shambles]

Miles To Go Before I Sleep - Chapter Ten.

Summary: Jackieboy Man has been missing for so long even he is losing hope of ever finding his way home. Henrik Schneeplestien is struggling to cope after the events that left Jack in a coma. Chase Brody is trying to piece his life together after it crumbled around him. Marvin is feeling separated from his family. Jameson Jackson is fighting his own demons. And Jack is sleeping through it all. Ev̡ęr͝ythi̸n͏g is go̡i͞ng̢ acc̕ord͏i̶ng ţo̕ ̡p͞la̡n͠.͞ ҉

Links: Under the ‘Miles to Go Before I Sleep’ heading on my page, or search the ‘#Miles to go before I sleep’ tag

Warnings: Nothing really.

A/N: Brief Hiatus is over, but I’m still figuring out how my life looks at University, so updates may be a little spotty until I figure out when a better time to post is and figure out a routine. Love you all, thank you for sticking with me! Betas are @dinadinu @xtracheesy,@a-septic-writer-of-art and  @softgreysweaters . Dina also drew the banner.

An annoying buzz in his ear woke him. Marvin groaned, trying to pull himself out of his dream fogged sleep. He rolled over in an effort to block out the sound, but it persisted.

Pushing himself up on one elbow, hair falling in his eyes, he woke up enough to realise it was his phone. With a groan, he reached out to grab it, answering and dropping his head back onto the pillow.

“Mmm?” he said as a greeting.

“Marvin, right? It’s Jacob from Rickety Stool.” Marvin groaned again, closing his eyes. Rickety Stool was Chase’s favourite bar, and this wasn’t the first time Marvin had received a call from its owner. Chase had a knack for getting into trouble.

“Is it Chase?” he muttered, his voice still thick with sleep.

“I’m afraid so. He’s causing quite a disturbance, and you did say to call you before I called the police.”

“Yeah,” Marvin said. He groaned once more, very tempted to leave Chase be and let him face the consequences. A night in jail might do him good.

But he couldn’t do that - if Chase was out drinking again it meant that things had clearly not gone well with Stacy. And she could use an overnight jail trip to push for full custody of the kids.

So he let out a long sigh and nodded slowly.

“I’ll be there as soon as I can,” he said reluctantly.

“Thank you, sir,” Jacob said, and Marvin grunted, hanging up. He didn’t move for a long moment, wishing he could drift back into sleep. He was exhausted - using that much magic at once had sucked all his energy.

With effort, he pushed himself up, adjusting his mask into a more comfortable position. He hadn’t even bothered taking it off earlier, he had been too tired. Running a hand through his hair, he managed to escape from the call of his blankets.

A commotion was forming in the corner of the bar when Marvin stepped through the door. He could make out Jacob - a tall, dominating figure - standing near them, clearly trying to keep the peace, but he could tell it was about to get out of hand.

He quickly crossed the space, joining the edge of the crowd. Peering through the heads, he saw, with slight disappointment, but not surprise, that Chase was standing in the middle, eyes blazing. He looked ready to fight - and he looked very drunk.

“Y’spilt m’drink,” Chase growled, glaring up at another man. The man was much larger than Marvin’s younger brother and was backed by two other equally large figures.

“Yeah, well, maybe you should have thought about that before barging into our business,” one of the growled, stepping forward and shoving Chase in the chest. He stumbled back, swaying wildly.

Marvin held his breath, praying that he wouldn’t do anything stupid. But Chase was Chase, and anger flashed in his eyes and he snatched up the bottle beside him on the bar. He swayed slightly, paused, then flung the bottle in the general direction of the man who had pushed him.

Given his intoxicated state, Marvin wasn’t too surprised when it missed entirely and shattered on the head of one of the bystanders. For a frozen moment, no one reacted. Then, the victim of Chase’s bad aim let out a loud cry and shoved himself forward.

“Alright then! Is this how it’s going to be?” he demanded.

“Okay, okay, settled down!” Jacob tried desperately, raising his hands and trying to push between the angry crowd and Chase.

“This punk needs to be taught a lesson,” one of the men growled, glaring at Chase. Chase glared right back, snatching up an abandoned shot and downing it.

“Well take it outside then,” Jacob said shortly. “I don’t need any more mess in here.”

“M’not goin’ anywhere,” Chase slurred.

“You sure about that?”

Marvin groaned softly, knowing he would have to intervene soon before Chase got hurt. Despite the temptation to let him get a bit of a beating in the hopes that it would teach him a lesson, Marvin knew he couldn’t let that happen to his younger brother. So, he pushed his way to Chase’s side.

“M’rvin!” Chase called as he caught sight of him. “What’re you doin’ ‘ere?”

“I’m taking you home,” Marvin said shortly, grabbing his shoulder.

“In a moment,” the man Chase had hit with the bottle said sharply, one had pressed to a large cut from the glass of the bottle. “We gotta teach him a lesson first.”

“As much as that is tempting to allow, I’m afraid I can’t do that,” Marvin said, his voice dark. He was too tired to use much magic and he hoped that he wouldn’t have to try too hard to get them to let him go with Chase.

“I don’t think so. If you wanna join him in his beating, I won’t stop you though.”

Marvin sighed softly, letting his eyes glow slightly. He held himself up to his full height, trying to seem as intimidating as possible, eyes glowing, magic making his cloak flow softly. The men stepped back slowly, muttering uncertainly to each other.

“I suggest you let us go,” Marvin growled.

For a moment, he was afraid they would keep persisting. He wasn’t sure what he would do then - he certainly didn’t have the energy to take on four fully grown men and look after Chase.

But too his immense relief, they backed down, the crowd - sensing a fight wouldn’t actually break out - stepping back as well.

Marvin wasted no time, keeping a firm hold on Chase’s arm and all but dragging him out of the building.

“I don’ wanna go, Marv,” Chase complained, trying to pull away.

“You need to come home and sober up,” Marvin snapped. He was tired, he was frustrated and he was angry at Chase. Even as drunk as he was, Chase seemed to sense that and didn’t fight as they made their way to the car.

They were quiet for a long while, Marvin focusing on not crashing in his anger, Chase thankfully noticing the atmosphere of the vehicle. But about five minutes away from the bar, a low whining filled the silence, and Mavin glanced at Chase to see his shoulder shaking.

He sighed softly, knowing what that meant. It meant Chase was in a clingy, needy drunk mood now. He wasn’t sure that was any better than angry drunk Chase.

“I take it things didn’t go well with Stacy?” he asked - anything better than that horrible noise. But it was clearly the wrong thing to say - Chase’s sobs got louder and more pitiful.

“Damnit Chase - I swear I will drop you off on the side of the road if you don’t shut up!”

“Sh - she’s not l-letting me s-see the ki-ids anymore,” he whined, wiping his eyes and looking up. He suddenly gagged and Marvin cursed, slamming the window down.

“Outside!” he snapped, and to his relief, Chase turned and hurled the contents of his stomach out the window - not into his car. He knew from experience that was not a smell that left quickly.

They fell into an uneasy silence for the rest of the drive, Chase occasionally sobbing or hiccuping. Marvin drove perhaps a little too violently, but he was angry and wanted to go back to bed.

Chase leaned on him heavily as Marvin unlocked the door and stepped inside, muttering occasionally. Once inside, Marvin made a beeline for Chase’s room.

“Straight to bed and you can sleep it off,” he said sharply, lowering Chase onto the bed.

“I wanna see Jackie,” Chase muttered.

“Well Jackie doesn’t want to see you like this.”

“You’re being meeaaan he’s my brooother.”

“Jackie needs his rest, alright? If Henrik says it’s okay you can see him tomorrow.” Marvin sighed, pressing clutching the bridge of his nose through his mask. “Damnit Chase, you have to stop drinking like this.”

“Stacy’s fault. She’s being meeaaan.”

“Stacy saying you can’t see the kids is no reason to get wasted at…” he glanced at the clock, muttering a curse. “Chase it’s 4pm.”

“An ‘m not tired! You’re a meany!”

“You need to stop! Alright Chase!” Marvin snapped. He was sick of it. He was sick of picking his brother up, he was sick of seeing him in such a state.

“Stacy’s being mean!” Chase snapped back.

“Stacy’s not in control of your actions!” Marvin shot back. “You are an adult Chase - start acting like it.”

“Why should I listen to you?”

“Because I’m your brother and I hate seeing you like this. Listen to me, Chase -”

“No one likes you though!” Chase shouted.

Marvin flinched. He couldn’t help it - Chase’s words cut too deep. He tried not to let it show, but Chase clearly picked up on the impact that had on him. He stumbled to his feet, swaying, and glared at his older brother.

“No one likes you cause you’re not a favourite. An - an the community never cared about you and Jack didn’t even give you a name so you’re just a big meany!” He shoved at Marvin’s chest, stumbling slightly. 

Marvin spun around abruptly, not meeting Chase’s eyes.

“I’m leaving,” he said shortly, storming out of the room. He didn’t hear Chase’s response as he slammed the door behind him.

He almost made it to his room before Henrik cut him off.

“Marvin - there you are. We must have a talk about Jac-”

“Piss off, Schneeplestein!” Marvin snarled, not in the mood to talk. He tried to ignore the way Schneep recoiled away from him, the bright flash of fear that shone in his eyes as he shied away from Marvin. He didn’t care and slammed the door behind him, leaning against it.

He let out a shaky breath, ripping his mask off his face and flinging it across the room, suddenly not wanting the prison across his face. Sinking down the door, he angrily wiped tears away from his eyes. Crying was foolish - he knew that what Chase said was true. And he knew that Chase didn’t mean it - he wasn’t in his right mind.

But Chase’s words had echoed what he had been thinking for the past few weeks.  Chase’s words spoke too clearly that his secret thoughts were true. He wasn’t liked. The others didn’t care for him.

A flicker of light caught his attention and he looked up to see his computer flash to life. Frowning, he stepped forward slowly, unsure why it had turned on. A message flashed across the screen, a familiar note.

“Fe͟ȩl̵ìng d͜ow̛n, ̨ki͢t̸ k͡a̴t̛?̷”

For a long moment, he just stared at the screen, hesitating. Then, slowly, he sank into the seat. He knew he shouldn’t - he knew who was sending the messages, he knew this was dangerous. But somehow, he couldn’t stop himself. 

Who else was there to talk to? 

Tag list: 

@watermelonsinmyattic  @cute-anxious-kitten @asunachinadoll @aesthetic-ego @iris-the-asparagus @plutoandpolaris @vity-dream @fangirlintrovert @viostormcaller @squishygamermama @theblackphoebe @anqshusxx

[glqwberries]

Oh fuck off connor

here’s a little teaser. it sucks i know but bear with me. 

Isn’t it funny how quickly everything can go to shit? One second he’s getting married to the woman of his dreams. He’s waking up next to her, watching the soft sunlight drip on her face. He’s having a kid with her, he’s happy. He has a beautiful wife, with a beautiful kid on the way. His new job, which was blogging, was starting to gain some attention. Nothing could get in his way.

Not everything lasts forever, he supposes. Especially if he, of all people, actually thought things were going well.

It started when his daughter was born.

Chase had never felt such love for one person before, and when he saw his little girl for the first time, he cried for the first time in a while. All that stress that he had was drifting away, it was insignificant because his daughter was in his arms. He kissed his exhausted wife on the nose, careful with the baby. He was still crying softly.

Too bad it wasn’t going to be the last time he cries over his kid.  

[aaaaaarchive]

Nike ACG Changste.

[katskip]

Finally finished 💙🏔 my tribute to the tallest of the seven summits in the northern hemisphere

The North Face: Everest & Changste (9/19/19) and Denali (10/13/19), acrylic on canvas board

[manjomejun]

chad angst, or as I like to call it, changst,

[senseless-septic-shambles]

COOOOONNNEER why must you hurt the boy!!!

52 or 140(?) for the angst prompt thing if ya' want

Prompts: 52. “Why are you doing this to yourself?” 140. “I deserve to rot.”

Word count: 385

Trigger warnings: implied self harm and drinking, attempted suicide

Notes: ouch

Chase sat on the floor of his bedroom, empty whiskey bottle by his side. He stared dully at his arms, littered with marks, old and new. He didn’t care what happened to himself at this point, no one even cared about him anyway. Not his brothers, not his kids, not stacy, not even his so called fans. The little voice in his head was telling him to finally do it, finally do what he had been trying to do. He stood up and walked to his bedside table, grabbing the gun, checking for bullets. He opened the chamber to find there was only one left, that was enough. He turned the gun in his hand, thinking if this is really what he wanted to do. He lifted the gun to his head, wrapping his finger around the trigger and…

Knock knock knock.

It came from the door.

“Go away,“ Chase croaked.

The door opened. Obviously one of his brothers didn’t care about his damn privacy.

“Chase, Henrik told me to… What are you doing?” Marvin said, a worried tone in his voice.

“What I’ve been working up the courage to do for a year,” He said coldly.

“Chase… come here..” Marvin whispered.

Chase reluctantly walked over to his brother, looking at the floor as he walked. He stopped a few feet in front of his brother, still looking down.

Marvin hugged him tightly, his hand running through Chase’s hair. Chase didn’t return the hug, not really wanting physical contact at that moment. After a minute or two, Marvin pulled away, taking the gun out of Chase’s hand and tossing it to the side. Chase’s eyes followed the gun to where it went. He told himself he’d have to retrieve that later.

Marvin held his brother’s hands, looking down.

“Why are you doing this to yourself, Chase?” He asked.

No response.

“Chase.. Please answer me.. I care about you..”

“No you don’t…” Chase mumbled. No one cared about him. The fact that his brother wasn’t freaking out that he was trying this said something about how his brother felt anyway.

Chase shook free of Marvin’s grip, turning away from his brother and walking to his bed, just sitting down.

“Please leave me… I deserve rot.” Chase said, looking back up at Marvin, tears in his eyes.

[cookiekat-blogz]

cinderella boy episode 31

quick thing I wanted to point out,

buddy stuttered when saying "fine. I don't need this" (basically I don't care) so he clearly did. Yet when chase said "You're just as bad as them" he clenched his first. He was clearly upset and offended by this comment suggesting that he disagrees and believes that they are worse or sees them in a bad light since he doesn't want to be compared to them.

Chase acted out of anger when he said it, but that doesn't change how he basically said "You deserve you're trauma or whatever you're being put through cus ur a mean person >:c" We can tell this seriously offended buddy and caused him to doubt everything chase said before (about helping him and whatnot) even more. He already doubted chase because of how he declined his offer and moved his hand. Our mans got some serious wall up for sure. Chase's reaction to buddy using him just made it worse.

Buddy was upset at chase and clearly offended. Yet he didn't want to hurt him (but swinging a spear around is bound to hurt SOMEONE buddy, lets be fr) This shows that either buddy doesn't think much(/j), did it out of anger so much so that he couldn't and didn't predict chase getting hurt, or he expected chase to not get hurt. We can tell this by when he was all "N-No I didn't mean that I just- I wasnt- I-I thought that... that you wou-"

here, I'll fill in (what I assumed based on context) what he was going to say:

"No I didn't mean that I just was angry/wanted to scare you" (idk but he prob couldn't say it cus he's bad at feelings and all. its clear he didn't (at first) intend on hurting chase so he prob did this out of anger to scare chase into taking it back(???)

"I wasn't trying to hurt you" (he was purpousfully missing right until he well, ...didn't? we can tell he's good with spears too, knowing the right time and way to attack since he got the fish -- even though storybook things are easier.)

"I thought that you would've dodged" (Maybe he expected chase to do what he's been doing this whole time and doge again? Or maybe he expected him to use his wonderful ballet skills?)

despite all of this they were both in the wrong, bad chase, you can't say that to people! and bad buddy, don't swing literal murder weapons around and at your crush if you DON'T want to hurt them, no matter how angry you are! >:c

[bloomyeu]

Give me your TMI

pairing: bang chan x female reader

summary: as your friendship slowly turns into something more, you dont know what to do

word count: 2k

warnings: angst but what else did u expect

a/n: i didnt rlly know how to end this one ahaha

series masterlist masterlist | requests

Your apartment has always been a sanctuary, a place where you and chan can escape from the harsh realities of your lives.

It's a cozy, intimate space filled with personal touches—a shelf packed with your favorite books, a few plants thriving in the soft light by the window, and a well-worn couch where the two of you have spent countless evenings together. Your cat, mimi, a fluffy ball of fur, lazily sprawls across the armrest, occasionally flicking her tail.

This place has become a second home for Chan, a silent witness to the unspoken bond between you.

The two of you have always had a connection that others noticed but never fully understood. There’s a familiarity between you that goes beyond friendship—inside jokes, shared glances, and the comfort of each other’s presence. Yet, despite the closeness, neither of you has ever put a label on what you have. It’s a delicate balance, one you both seem content to maintain, even as the lines blur between friendship and something more. The lack of labels has kept things simple, or so you tell yourself, but, the ambiguity has become harder to ignore.

Lately, you’ve noticed a change in Chan. He’s still around, but there’s a distance in the way he interacts with you—a hesitation in his words, a slight pullback when your hands brush. The long conversations that once flowed effortlessly now feel stilted, as if he’s holding something back. You can’t pinpoint when it started, but it’s there, gnawing at you in quiet moments.

as you sit on the couch, your cat purring softly beside you, the silence between you feels heavy. Chan is here, but his mind seems elsewhere, lost in thoughts he’s not sharing. It’s unlike him, and the uncertainty gnaws at you. You’ve always valued the openness between you, the way you could talk about anything and everything. But now, something feels different, and the realization stings more than you expected.

You take a deep breath, steeling yourself. “Channie,” you start, your voice cutting through the quiet, “is everything okay? You’ve been… different lately.”

He glances at you, surprised, but quickly looks away, his expression guarded. “What do you mean?” he asks, his tone carefully neutral, as if he’s bracing himself for what’s coming next.

“You’ve been distant,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady. “I don’t know, it feels like you’re pulling away from me.”

For a moment, he doesn’t respond, his eyes fixed on the floor. When he finally speaks, his voice is low, almost hesitant. “I’m just… dealing with some stuff. It’s not you.”

But you’re not convinced. The way he’s avoiding your gaze, the way his shoulders are tense—it all tells a different story. And suddenly, you realize that whatever he’s dealing with, it’s something he’s not ready to share with you.

And that hurts.

—

As seasons pass, the distance between you and Chan only grows more pronounced. What was once a subtle shift in his demeanor now becomes a chasm that feels impossible to bridge. He’s still around, but his presence seems to be a mere shadow of what it once was. You see him less often, and when he does come over, it’s with an air of detachment that leaves you feeling isolated and confused.

The small, everyday moments that used to be filled with laughter and warmth are now marked by an awkward silence. Conversations that used to flow effortlessly now stumble, interrupted by long pauses where neither of you knows what to say. When Chan does speak, his responses are clipped and terse, as though he’s going through the motions but not really engaging. You notice how he avoids eye contact, his gaze often drifting to the corners of the room or his phone, anything to escape the weight of your shared space.

The more he withdraws, the more you find yourself overthinking every interaction, searching for clues as to why he’s pulling away. You replay conversations in your mind, trying to pinpoint where things might have gone wrong. Was it something you said? Something you did? You want to ask, but every time you try to approach the topic, Chan’s demeanor makes it clear that he’s not open to discussing it. His evasiveness only fuels your anxiety, making you feel more like an outsider in a relationship you thought you understood.

channie!!!! imy :[ mimi misses u 2 come over for dinner?

sure only for mimi tho hehe

hoping to have a more relaxed setting where you can talk things through. You prepare his favorite meal, setting the table with care, trying to create an atmosphere that feels intimate and comfortable. When he arrives, however, he seems distracted and distant. His greeting is brief, and he quickly retreats to the couch, petting mimi while he scrolls on phone. his posture stiff and closed off.

You try to make conversation, asking about his day and sharing anecdotes from yours, but he responds with short, disinterested answers. As you sit across from him at the table, a sense of frustration wells up inside you. You’ve put in the effort to create a space where he could feel at ease, but it’s clear that he’s not fully present.

Finally, you can’t hold back any longer. 

“Channie, we really need to talk,” you say, your voice trembling slightly. “I don’t understand what’s happening between us. It feels like you’re pulling away more and more, and it’s hurting.”

He looks at you, his expression unreadable. “I told you, it’s not you. I’m just going through some stuff, and I need some time to figure it out.”

You feel a pang of frustration. “But I’m right here. I want to support you, but it’s hard when you’re shutting me out. I feel like I’m losing you, and I don’t even know why.”

Chan’s face softens, but his eyes remain distant. “It’s not about losing me,” he says quietly. “It’s about me needing to deal with things on my own. I’m afraid that if I let you in, it’ll make everything worse.”

The admission stings, and you can’t help but feel a mix of sadness and anger. “So you think pushing me away is going to solve anything? All it’s doing is making me feel like I don’t matter. Like I dont matter. Do you not trust me?”

Chan’s shoulders slump, and he runs a hand through his hair, looking torn. “I didn’t mean for it to come across that way. It’s just… hard for me to open up. I’ve always been this way, and it’s not easy to change.”

The conversation dwindles, leaving an uncomfortable silence between you. The warmth of the dinner you prepared feels cold now, and the evening that was meant to bring you closer only highlights the growing distance between you. You both sit in silence, the emotional gap between you widening, leaving you to grapple with the painful realization that the connection you once shared is now shrouded in uncertainty.

—

Without Chan, your days are filled with a profound sense of confusion and heartbreak. His admissions had left you reeling, struggling to reconcile the man you thought you knew with the one who now seems so distant. You find yourself replaying his words over and over in your mind, trying to make sense of his fear and his withdrawal. The more you think about it, the more you realize how deep his insecurities run, and how they’ve come to shape the dynamics between you.

The apartment, once a save space for the two of you, now feels like a reminder of what’s slipping away. The warmth and comfort you once associated with these four walls are overshadowed by the empty spaces left by Chan’s absence. Every corner of the apartment seems to whisper memories of better times, and it only amplifies the silence that has settled between you.

Chan’s absence becomes a constant, painful presence in your daily life. He still reaches out occasionally, but his messages are brief and lack the warmth that once characterized your conversations. 

When he does come over, it’s clear that he’s not fully engaged, almost like he doesnt want to be there. He’s physically there but emotionally distant, and the brief interactions you have are tinged with a sadness that neither of you can quite articulate.

You try to give him the space he’s asked for, but it’s hard not to feel hurt by his growing distance. The silence between you grows more pronounced, filled with unspoken words and unresolved feelings. Every attempt to bridge the gap feels like it only widens it further. You’ve always been able to talk to Chan about anything, but now even the simplest conversations feel strained and awkward.

In your quiet moments alone, you grapple with your own feelings of rejection and sadness. You understand that Chan’s fear of vulnerability is driving his behavior, but it doesn’t make the pain any easier to bear. You miss the easy closeness you once shared, and the emotional chasm that has opened between you feels impossible to cross.

You’re left in a painful limbo, uncertain of how to move forward. You want to support Chan and be there for him, but the constant silence and emotional distance are taking a toll on you. The weight of the situation is heavy, and as each day passes, you find yourself searching for a way to bridge the gap between you, hoping that somehow, amidst the silence, you can find a path to understanding and healing.

—

hey ynnie we shld talk ur place?

channie hii yea we shld sure wtv works for u

The decision to confront Chan one last time feels both necessary and heartbreaking. When he arrives, the familiarity of his presence contrasts sharply with the emotional distance that now separates you. The apartment feels both intimate and alien, a space that no longer holds the same comfort it once did.

You sit together on the couch, the air heavy with the weight of unspoken words. Your cat, mimi, sensing the shift in atmosphere, retreats to a corner, adding to the sense of somber quiet. You look at Chan, your heart aching with the realization of what’s become of your relationship.

“Chan,” you begin, your voice trembling with emotion, “I think we need to acknowledge whats going on ya know, this obviously is about us, you can't really about it now.”

Chan’s eyes meet yours, a mixture of sadness and resignation in his gaze. “I know,” he replies softly. “I’ve been avoiding this conversation, I'm sorry, but we both knew that it was never going to work.”

There’s a pause as both of you grapple with the weight of the moment. The connection that once drew you together—your shared curiosity and mutual affection—now seems like a distant memory. What was once a source of closeness has become a barrier, as your emotional needs and fears have diverged.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said,” Chan continues, his voice filled with regret. “You know with my job and all, I just cant handle a relationship. Besides you're moving for school in the fall, how would it even work out?”

You nod, tears welling in your eyes. “I know channie, trust me I do. But we should have tried. Whenever I try talking to you, you just shut me out. Do you not care?” 

Chan’s expression mirrors your own sorrow. “It’s not about that. You know that. We were two lonely people who found each other, nothing more, nothing less.”

The conversation is a painful acknowledgment of the truth that both of you have been avoiding. 

Despite the depth of your feelings and the history you share, the realization that he didnt want to be with you hurts. The barriers that have emerged—his fear of vulnerability and your struggle to connect—are too significant to overcome at this point.

As the sun sets, you both just sit there, the silence between you two marking the end. There are no grand gestures or promises of reconciliation, only the quiet understanding that its over.

Chan leaves the apartment, and you watch him go, feeling a profound sense of loss. The space that once held the warmth of your connection now feels hollow, marked by the absence of the person who once meant so much. You’re left with the echoes of what was and the uncertainty of what the future holds.

In the quiet solitude that follows, you maybe regret not telling him sooner, heck maybe even meeting him. 

As you sit alone in the apartment, the reality of parting ways sinks in, and you begin the process of moving forward, carrying with you the bittersweet memories of what once was.

fin.

series masterlist masterlist | requests

[dual-fantasy]

first love / late spring is the chase song ever. lately hes been crying like a tall child. please hurry leave him he cant breathe please don't say you love him. one word from you(emma) and he would jump right off this ledge hes on. tell him dont so he can crawl back in. he was so young when he behaved 25 yet now hes found hes grown into a tall child. humpty is a chemma song. he broke what emma gave him but she kept giving more. they make me physically ill oh my god theres nothing left for you is also a chase(could be chemma post breakup depending on how you interpret the use of you in it) but in a really specific way you just have to understand last words of a shooting star is a chemma at their absolute worst song but, again, in a really specific way you just have to understand. chase learnt from movies how love ought to be geyser is a chase song in a season 1 chemma way. no explanation it just is In Conclusion chaseis mitskipilled. all the way. every song in one way or another (additional thing. with more people jumping on the Changst Wagon im gonna start signing off with 🪦🐕 grave dog!!!!!! from the og changst poster under td takes)

chase is mitskipilled in the most severe way ever. he retired from sad and has a new career in business (his yt channel). the land is inhospitable and so is he.

first love / late spring is so real. it's his self destructive properties and the isolation he puts himself through. the assumption he makes that people are going to ignore him so he doesn't care about it to begin with (he cares so deeply though)

humpty is literally SO REAL like that's perfect. it's one of my personal fav mitski songs and it's just so good for them. he's too frail for her to touch. it goes both ways depending on how you interpret it im soooo normal about this

there's nothing left for you is imo him having to come to terms with leaving the beach house and in general having to abandon his self destruction. he has to leave in order to improve but he finds it difficult even though he knows that there's nothing left for him because it's all he ever knew. and I think the sweethearts door is Bowie because I can do whatever I want

I get last words of a shooting star and geyser but in a way I can't put into words without sounding insane. you're real they've very accurate but it's just that people have to get it I can't explain.

toung tied by free throw is chemma breakup but from chase's toxic abandonment issues perspective. at least in my opinion. did she forget she'd said forever when he asked her how long she would stay? and I the dog/the body by sleater-kinney is chase. trust me it's so good.

and grave dog is literally so cute!!!! more people on the changst wagon is awesome :) I'll tag your posts with 🪦🐕 from now on so they're easy to find

[crystalninjaphoenix]

Chase angst is called “Changst”

[tauriatalksmonkeys]

does anyone want to read about charlie’s gay awakening?

no? 

well thank goodness there’s a readmore here... 

so this is actually a really personal story for me that i’m writing to cope~ it doesn’t have a title but i’ve been calling it changst in my folders bc. i can, i guess.

this takes place in canonverse and charlie would be about 16 here.

Charlie glared at her phone, face half smooshed into her pillow.

NessIsBest >>so >>guess what

Charlie didn’t want to respond. She really, really didn’t. But she couldn’t leave Vanessa hanging. Nessie was one of her oldest friends. They had been through some tough times together. She couldn’t just leave her hanging.

But oh, did she want to.

Because she knew, she just knew that this was about Ness’s new boy. Ness fell in love faster than anyone that Charlie had ever met, and this boy had captured her heart worse than anyone else. It drove Charlie crazy, because she didn’t like this guy. She would almost even go as far to say that she hated him. (It didn’t matter that they had never met.)

Her love for Ness won out over her hatred for Mystery Guy.

ChimChar >>what?

NessIsBest >>we went out for dinner today >>and he paid for my food >>and then we went and played with kittens at the animal shelter >>and he walked me home >>am I crazy or did it seem like a date???

ChimChar >>I mean kinda, I guess?

NessIsBest >>I mean >>I know he’s not ready right now >>but like >>ugh >>I dunno >>he just… >>sometimes I feel like he’s into me too >>I swear to you he was flirting with me all day >>AND >>we started talking again about moving in together after high school? >>like he knows what assholes my parents are >>and he wants to help me get away from them >>and he was talking about adopting an animal together >>and I just. >>I dunno >>I feel like maybe there could be something >>If I just gave him a little longer >>like lately I swear I’m at his house more often than I am mine >>just watching him play video games >>or horsing around on the couch

Charlie’s stomach felt tight as she read the messages. She bit her lip. She wanted to shove her phone under the mattress so she didn’t have to look at it anymore.

All she could think was—I would move in with you. I would help you get away from your parents. Remember when you used to be at mine all the time?

But she kept those thoughts in. There wasn’t any point in spilling them into the chatlog. Ness would be like, “yes of course I know, but you don’t really wanna be too far from your dad.” And then she’d be back to talking about The Guy again.

He wasn’t even that attractive. Charlie scowled at her phone, scrolling up to the last pic Ness had sent of him. Charlie didn’t see it—Ness called him cute, but to Charlie he just looked… like a boy. No different from all the other boys in their grade.

It wasn’t like she had a problem with guys. She’d found a few celebrities cute, here and there. But they just weren’t… that attractive, to her. She didn’t see how Ness could look at this one and be like, “I want to kiss him.” Or even, “I want to have sex with him.” Which she’d talked about. In enough detail that Charlie wanted to bleach her brain.

But she hadn’t said anything then, either.

She scrolled back down to current messages.

ChimChar >>I don’t think it’s stupid to keep hoping >>but… I dunno Ness >>I don’t think moving in together is a good idea

NessIsBest >>I dunno >>I think we could make it work >>I mean the worst part would be not getting a break from each other, right? >>but if we were both working and hanging out with our friends it wouldn’t be too bad >>it’s not like I have anyone else to move in with >>he’s the only one of my friends that want’s OFF of Shuggazoom >>like I mean I know you do >>but you still want to come back >>i… don’t.

ChimChar >>I guess that’s fair

It wasn’t. It wasn’t fair at all. But it was what Charlie had to say, wasn’t it? To be a good friend. To keep having Ness around for the foreseeable future. To have her around until it all blew over.

There was a part of her—a very small part—that kind of wished they could just skip to the part where Ness came crying to Charlie after the guy stopped leading her on and finally let her down. Like he should have from the beginning. It made Charlie feel like a bad friend, though, to wish her best friend that kind of heartbreak.

She shoved her whole face in the pillow this time. She wanted to scream.

Her phone blipped again. Charlie was half tempted to pretend she had fallen asleep, but… she checked the message anyway.

And found herself relaxing (and hating herself for it) when she saw it wasn’t Ness. It was another friend of hers.

Rina-Beana >>yo what up char >>ur up awful late >>hope ur not frying your brain in the books again

ChimChar >>pff no >>just talking to Ness

Rina-Beana >>guy still leading her on?

ChimChar >>yeah

Rina-Beana >>u doin’ okay?

ChimChar >>yeah, why wouldn’t I be?

Rina-Beana >>u got really quiet at lunch when she brought up guy >>ur. not a quiet person, char

ChimChar >>I resent that

Rina-Beana >>char

ChimChar >>its nothing >>really

Rina-Beana >>look I may not have known you as long as vanessa but >>I still know you >>and this isn’t nothing

ChimChar >>I dunno how to really put it into words >>I guess I just… >>I dunno >>I’m protective of Ness >>and when she starts flirting with these guys it just >>bothers me??? >>because they’re not good enough for her >>to me >>and I always… I dunno >>I just feel pushed to the wayside lately >>I guess >>we don’t talk the way we used to but >>she’s always sending me screenshots of where she’s talking to him and I just >>I guess I’m jealous >>and I don’t understand why >>because I know that I’m her best friend >>and I know that I’m still going to be here regardless of what happens with the guy >>I just. >>it sucks.

Charlie rolled onto her back and threw her arm over her eyes. She hated spilling her guts more than anything—but Rina would know what to do, maybe. She was a year older than Charlie. She’d be graduating this year, and headed off to pilot’s school. A year probably didn’t make that much of a difference in wisdom, but Charlie would take what she could get. It wasn’t like she could talk to her dad about this.

Well, she probably could, but he wouldn’t really know what to do. He was better at coming up with advice when she and one of her friends had had a fight or something. He wouldn’t understand why she was so jealous.

Not that Charlie understood why she was jealous.

Her phone pinged, and she raised it up again.

Rina-Beana >>char… >>have you ever considered that you might be in love with Ness?

Charlie stared at her phone.

ChimChar >>what.

Rina-Beana >>look, I could be entirely off the mark >>but I remember when I first realized I was gay >>it was because I was constantly jealous of my best friend’s boyfriends >>I was constantly putting myself in their shoes >>comparing how I would treat her to them >>and just. always angry at them for not treating her right. >>it got to the point where I could barely stand to be around her, or them, because I was just constantly upset that she didn’t see me >>maybe im totally of the mark and that’s not what’s going on here >>but it just… I dunno >>it felt similar

Was Charlie in love with Ness?

She could feel her heart racing at the thought. It didn’t feel wrong, but… it wasn’t a label Charlie had stuck on it before. And it felt… strange.

ChimChar >>i >>i guess i’ve never thought of it before >>i mean. >>maybe

She needed to let it sit for a bit. Keep trying it on. But there was a part of her, deep down, that she could feel saying yes. That’s what this is.

She needed the rest of her to feel it first.

Rina-Beana >>take ur time  >>it’s not always something you figure out in a split second >>and if you have questions >>im here.