#challenges we face in life
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Challenges In Life
In our path of life, we seek ease, A gentle breeze to carry us with grace, But challenges arrive, like storms that seize, And push us into paths we can’t embrace. Oh, how we wish for roads without a thorn, Where petals line the way, without a care, Yet struggles come, like shadows that are born, To teach us how to rise, to learn, to dare. In moments when the world feels like a weight, When…
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#Challenges#challenges we face in life#facing challenges and growing#growth comes through uncomfortalbe times#thorns on the road#troubles in life
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When you spend 20 years attempting to bring down the child slavery, murdering, human trafficking exploitation ring that stole your childhood, murdered your friends, and killed countless innocents only to have them rebrand as 'Noble Freedom Fighters™' off-screen.
#rip zevran's crusade against the crows >:(#when people said they wanted to be crows they didn't want devs to make the faction nice so we won't feel bad or conflicted about it#people wanted to be conflicted! they wanted to see the faction in all its glitz and glamour - then see what it hid beneath all the mystique#choose to play as a crow that loves the life/hates it/is undecided/etc...#but i'm sorry i forgot that this game doesn't want to do 'role play' options my bad#i will not stand for this zevran erasure!!!#yes i've seen the codex entry that goes on about 'other crows are joining zevran' blah blah#have the antivan crows faced with a threat that challenged their outlook on why they fight#have the talons be the one to sell out antiva! in exchange for allowing their business to resume (have it be a sneaky reveal!!!)#their work has purpose and order to it so the antaam might agree! they're like 'babys first ben-hassrath!'#have Crows look around at their own home - see the vendor they bought fruit from disappear or the smiling old lady now cowed by grief#then have them decide to DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT#have a schism! have Zevran take in Crows who are unhappy - have them realize how shit the organization is!#boom! somewhat-noble freedom fighters! (they're doing their best okay)#or they can be 'idealists' from the get-go - thanks cursed AMA thread#my art <3#dragon age#datv critical#datv spoilers#dragon age the veilguard#zevran arainai
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been watching a lot of hermitcraft recently and am happy to report that i am hopelessly endeared by these little goobers 💕 they’re like bugs to me
close ups under the cut!
gonna be real this was absolutely just me taking the opportunity to get my grubby lil mitts all up in their character designs lol i heart interpreting mc skins
#my post#my art#hermitcraft#hermitcraft fanart#oh boy here we go#zedaph#tangotek#bdoubleo100#bdubs#rendog#falsesymmetry#stressmonster101#iskall85#cubfan135#goodtimeswithscar#WHY are there so MANYYY (<- is the one who drew that many)#anyways i love them they’re so…………#also just for the record i have Peaked with that lil ouppy rendog just LOOK AT HIMMM#i will never draw anything better than that he’s literally perfect#don’t. don’t worry about how long it took to draw one tiny thing it definitely wasn’t embarrassingly long struggling with dog legs#i’m also really proud of horsegirl bdubs giving his horf a big ol ‘MWAH!’ but that’s just because that one’s real cute :)#but yeah this was just a lil somethin somethin i poked at whenever i was in a Mood and needed something to draw forrr however many months#i tried challenging myself to draw hermits i probably wouldn’t much otherwise :)#it was fun i love designing my interpretations of various skins#it was really funny tho how i was fighting for my LIFE drawing zed and meanwhile ren and stress turned out perfect first try#was that purely on me for giving him wool and a terrible angle to draw a face at?#……..yeah probably but STILL#but i’m really pleased with how he turned out so 100% worth it babyyy#anyways posting this so i’ll stop poking at it i’ve gone ‘okay it’s Officially Done’ like 5 times now lol i need to leave it alone#POSTING THIS AGAIN BECAUSE I FORGOT TO TURN ON A LAYER AND DIDN’T NOTICEEE IF YOU SAW THE OG POST NO YOU DIDN’T
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Bump in the Night & Nevertober Day 23: Restless Spirits & Devil/Angel
#6#Bump in the Night#Bump in the Night 2024#Nevertober24#Nevermore#Nevermore Webtoon#Webtoon#The Book of Life#HIIIIII#wow I did good today not posting like 0.5 seconds before the day ends#And I made some cool pieces!!#For BITN I drew Manolo from Book of Life! First time drawing him and he came out cool#Whole movie is his spirit being restless#I love the music in that movie too#Si Puedes Perdonar mi amor#Y Te Amo y Más es muy bueno#The animation is cool and story is interesting#Xibalba y La Muerte dios mio I love them so much. La Muerte especially love her design and her voice hhggn#And then for Nevertober I drew them dressed uppppp#The song lyrics are from Angel by River Styx#Very top tier song.. I imagine Lenore and Annabel sing it like near the end of 42#Like Annabel tells her she’s leaving and then Lenore’s like “… can we sing one more song together?”#And it also helps bc the song’s like all on piano so Lenore plays it and hhhgnggn lesbians#The song’s in my Nevermore playlist on Spotify if you wanna find it and also see my giant collection of songs for this webtoon#But yeah this came out cute!! I love both their faces like cutie patooties#So glad the angel wings covered Annabel’s hair bc I didn’t feel like drawing that today#Uh yeah fun arts!! See you here tomorrow for all 3 art challenges
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I know most ppl rlly like gremlin-Moon who’s always picking on and messing with Y/N (BuT LiKE iN aN EnDEaRiNG WaY) but I grew up with three older brothers. Anyway I personally would love to hit gremlin-Moon with a bat
#doodles#sketches#fnaf moon x y/n#fnaf moon x reader#gremlin moon#I don mind the occasional joke but if all of ur humor is based on belittling or mocking me I can and will go Cain on ur ass#‘OOoOhH BuT He’SJuST MeSsINg ArOuND’ yeah and I can put him in the ground. bitch#‘awww but it’s a sign of his affection!!!!’ also gives very BoYs WiLL bE bOYs vibes and I want to fucking hit someone#Babbit vs stupid mf moon challenge. I win by default bc of pure feral rage and years worth of stifled violence#I’m in a mood today sorry#Babbit lore#aka small things abt my life#I’m the youngest of four and hav three older brothers!#yes it sucked. yes we did get along 80% of the time#anyway if u ever wonder why I’m so paranoid abt ppl mocking me to my face or behind my back abt my interests. now u know#hits face on floor repeatedly#silly fluff#silly bullshit#bones of a rabbit fnaf#bones of a rabbit
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"It is too easy to dismiss [Leonor of Navarre] as an overambitious schemer who would do anything to obtain a crown, shedding the blood of her own siblings and her subjects in order to attain the throne. However, a deeper investigation of her long lieutenancy and ephemeral reign shows a woman who fought tenaciously to preserve her place but also worked tirelessly to administer a realm which was crippled by internal conflict and the center of the political schemes of France, Aragon, and Castile. She tried to broker peace, fight off those who opposed her, repair the wounds caused by conflict, protect the sovereignty of the realm, and keep the wheels of governance turning. Leonor was not always successful in achieving all of these aims but given the background of conflict and the lack of cooperation she received from all of her family members, bar her loyal husband, it is a huge achievement that she survived to wear the crown at all. Many writers have argued that Leonor deserved the troubled lieutenancy, personal tragedies, an ephemeral reign, and a blackened reputation, basing their assumption that she committed a crime that cannot be [conclusively] proven. However, a more fitting description of her would be that of a resolute ruler who successfully overcame a multitude of challenges in order to survive in a difficult political landscape and gain a hard-fought throne.”
-Elena Woodacre, "Leonor of Navarre: The Price of Ambition", Queenship, Gender and Reputation in the Medieval and Early Modern West, 1060-1600 (Edited by Zita Eva Rohr and Lisa Benz)
#historicwomendaily#leonor of navarre#15th century#Navarrese history#my post#I mean...the crime can't be explicitly 'proven' but Leonor DID have the means motive and opportunity; she had the most to gain;#the timing was incredibly convenient for her; and most contemporaries believed she was responsible.#She *did* ultimately act against her brother [Carlos] and sister [Blanca]#Though of course the fact remains that:#1) The final responsibility lies with Juan the Faithless: he was the King; the one in power; and the one who rejected Navarre's succession#Blanca herself - while criticizing Leonor and Gaston - placed the ultimate blame on their father as her 'principal...destructor'#All three siblings were reacting to an unconventional disruption in the system caused by Juan & their actions should be judged accordingly.#2) I am hesitant to believe accusations of 'poison' as a cause of murder given how that was commonly used to slander controversial women#and given how it contributed to the dichotomy of Blanca as a tragic beautiful heroine and Leonor as her scheming ambitious sister#3) Even if Leonor DID commit the crime (imo she was at the very least complicit in it) she is still worthy of a reassessment.#I don't think it's fair for it to define her entire identity#Because it certainly did not define her life - she lived for decades before and would live for decades after#It was on the whole one of the many series of obstacles and challenges she had to face before she succeeded in ascending the throne.#The fact that she died so soon after IS ironic but it is in equal parts tragic. And we don't know what Leonor herself felt about it:#Did she think it was a hollow victory? Or did she feel nothing but satisfaction that she died as the Queen of Navarre? We'll never know.#Whatever the case: given her circumstances the fact that she survived to wear the crown itself was an achievement#It's funny because Woodacre parallels Leonor to Richard III in terms of 'blackened' reputations for 'unproven' (...sure) crimes#(thankfully she admits Richard has been long-rehabilitated; what she doesn't bring herself to admit is that he's now over-glorified)#But I don't think this parallel works at all for the exact reasons she uses to try and reassess Leonor#Namely: Richard was the one in power. He was the King. The ultimate blame for what happened to his nephews was his own.#and moreover: Richard's actions against the Princes DID define his reign and were exactly what provoked opposition to his rule.#Any so-called 'rehabilitation' that doesn't recognize and emphasize this is worthless#also if we want to get specific: the Princes were literal children who did nothing and were deposed in times of peace.#Carlos and Blanca were adults with agency and armies and Leonor's actions against them took place in the middle of a civil war#So ultimately I think Leonor's case is fundamentally very different and I don't think her comparison holds well at all
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I've decided to try to do another monthly challenge! This time it’s “photo studies but I’m not allowed to use the eyedropper tool to pick the colours” which I came up with because backgrounds and colours are still intimidating and I would like them not to be so much. X)
Figured I would go with landscapes for the first batch, and probably building or interiors for the second, and then maybe portraits? We’ll see!
Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
(1 hour each, references from pexels.com, putting some comparisons under the readmore if you want to see how well I did with the colour matching)
:>
#mydrawings#studies#landscape#background#it's the first time i'm not picking colours off the ref and honestly i think it's helping?? since i have to Actually Look at the colours#the urge to just eyedrop the reference does come back every once in a while but i managed X)#doing landscape studies is somewhat relaxing because i can focus on colours and it's okay if the shapes aren't completely accurate#but i expect it'll be harder if i go with portraits since it's much more obvious when face proportions are off#but that's what makes it a challenge isn't it!#or i could go with still life or food... hm...#well we'll get there when we get there#August drawing challenge
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living up to the villain sidestep name (thinking of a Third puppet)
#gideon shut the hell up challenge#on one hand. never in a million years would we let fawn have THREE puppets that we just alternate between#esp when eden and yaz are both canon and cannot be erased or replaced#HOWEVER. on the other hand. fawn w mirror puppet....?#fawn who is so caught up on The Good Old Days? finding a mirror of back then? having a visual reminder of when they were Good?#hiding in plain sight. despite everything it's still you (positive). despite everything it's still you (negative).#bonus evil points for 'hey ric why are u dating the girl version of fawn? that's so fucked up' and#'hey daniel and chen why don't u like this non-evil (aka not corrupted) version of fawn as much? that's so fucked up'#pov u are fawn becker abt 2 blame the corpse ur piloting for choosing a life of evil except that it's your face and choices and fate#oh right fate motive. there's smth there abt the fate of being doomed to be puppeted (regardless of if it's Them or just a lookalike) but#anyway we're not gonna do it but if we Were going to do it we'd specifically give them a name meaning hunter/huntress. just for the comedy#@ me think more abt how fawn considers themselves corrupted bc of how they're bad now tyyy
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i think owning a waffle maker would save me
#- lorii rambles#you have one waffle house waffle for the first time since earlier this year and suddenly your live changes#ive been craving a pancake and waffle house is literally right down the road from me now and and :(#No Pancake so waffle was the next best option I Suppose#but anyways i really want a waffle maker now i truly wholeheartedly believe it would fix the problems in my life#the regrets i have? the challenges i face?#waffle maker.#thinking of the undeniable fact of how we are born to love and inevitability grieve what we once loved?#oh that’s right … i have a waffle maker#who cares#on another note i adore having a tumblr#where else can i just talk to myself like this and not Exactly have it be publicly posted but also very publicly posted?#nowhere . nowhere on the internet is a still functioning website that is comparable to tumblr
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Twenty Day Challenge - Day Nine
Type: Fluff Piece Timeline: Free-Floating Location: Fin's Apartment
Fin hummed as the song played through their earbuds, drowning out all else. Rain pattered outside, but they couldn't hear it. All they could hear was the echoing voice of the singer. They were laid out on the floor- head tilted slightly to look at Prism. They could only imagine cat ears atop their own head, perked as far as they could be while they reached out to offer Prism a hand.
"So cute..." They murmured. Prism sniffed their fingers for a few moments- before slowly pushing her head forward, allowing them to pet her. They couldn't resist a soft smile at the tabby's behavior. Fin couldn't even hear their own voice- they could barely feel the echo in their throat under the thrumming of the beat. But- that was how they liked it. Incapable of hearing anything but that which they chose....
They sat upright when their phone suddenly went off- a small 'A TEXT MESSAGE IS HERE!' erupting in their ears.
[Tree Man 🌲] [Do you want me to pick up anything for dinner?]
They went pale. Fin jumped to their feet, phone forgotten as they dashed to the kitchen- only to discover the bubbling pan of black sludge (how had it become sludge?!) on the stove. It wasn't belching black fumes- how was anyone's guess- but it was definitely not a steaming pot of soup. They flinched.
[Self] [Uh...yeah. ≧ ﹏ ≦]
They sent it off, before turning off the unit. What the hell were they supposed to do with this...?! They pulled the pan off of the unit. Fin winced as the metal smacked against the countertop. Some of the 'soup' (could it even be called that) bounced and jiggled with the movement- but more in a manner resembling pudding than actual soup.
[Tree Man 🌲] [....did you burn something again?]
Now that... Fin didn't want to answer. But they'd already given it away in how they texted, so what was the point?
[Self] [....yes. I was going to make you some soup for when you got here....]
They took a photo of the mess and sent it.
[Self] [....but uh....I'd rather not feed you literal poison. >︿<I was gonna make it,...n' I spaced...]
[Tree Man 🌲] [Don't worry about it. However, I think that pan's done for...how do you feel about the vending machine outside your apartment building?]
Fin nearly sank to the floor. They exhaled, a sheepish smile on their face even as they fired off one final text- before moving to try to deal with the toxic disaster they'd accidentally created.
[Self] [I'd love that...just let me know when you're here. Dinner's on me, pretty man.]
Maybe it could be used in interrogations of villains....the thought made them chuckle silently.
[]
"...yeesh..." He'd be lying if he said that pan didn't look...questionable. He'd already bought a small container of milk chocolate as a surprise for Fin, and had been wondering about taking them to dinner at some point later that week...but the pot of what may have once been food accelerated those plans.
He made his way through the crowds, easily heading for Fin's place. He had the route between his apartment and their's memorized, each step sliding by almost unnoticed. His eyes flicked over the vending machine as he passed it by- one in a long row of them, each with differing options. Yagi exhaled as he took to the stairs- climbing five long floors before finally arriving at Fin's.
He stepped up to the door- ready to rap his knuckles against the wood when the door suddenly opened. He blinked- looking down at the disheveled mess below him.
"....you look like shit, Fin." It was a valid statement- one that had Fin chuckling as they shrugged their shoulders. There were bits and pieces of black gunk on their shirt, and their hair was far more wild than while they were at work- their clothes were dotted with water spots, and they held the offending pan- now somewhat emptied of black sludge- in one hand.
Yeah, they looked pretty bad.
"I noticed, love." They waved their free hand. "Don't worry, I ain't gonna try t' hug ya or anythin', not lookin' like this." They pulled away from the door, allowing Yagi to step inside. "I'll put on a change of clothes...I don't think th' pan's salvageable, so I was aboutta go chuck it in the community trash."
"...why were you trying to make soup in a pan, to begin with?..." Yagi could tell he'd hit something when Fin went stock-still for a few moments, before glancing down to the destroyed kitchen utensil. "...nevermind." He reached- easily managing to snag the pan from Fin's hands. The inside was full of a charred mass- which seemed to have adhered itself to the metallic surface. There were noticeable scrapes along the edges of the pan (presumably, from Fin trying to use a sponge on a nonstick surface).
"...maybe...let me help next time, Hazelnut." He felt sorry for the pan. "How often did you use this pan?..."
"Uh...this was one of my first tries at it, actually." Oh God. He glanced down to the pan, then to his small soulmate.
Note to self: keep an eye on them if they ever tried to cook at his place. Otherwise, he might have to replace what little cookware he owned...!
Though, it might be fun to teach them how to cook without obliterating any unfortunate pan or pot they came across... He wondered for a brief moment if their real Quirk was the destruction of kitchen supplies.
"I'll...go get changed." They pointed towards their closet, before quietly scampering towards it and kidnapping a few clothes...and then moving to hide in the bathroom. Yagi sighed, shaking his head.
While the thought that Fin wanted to surprise him warmed his heart...
He really didn't feel like being poisoned, today.
#Through the night/I face the fears for those who couldn’t fight || Writings#When you’re close to breakin’/Let me be your haven tonight || Cracked Facades#Writer's Yearly Challenge || 2024#Together we run/Til we see the morning light || Queue#//that moment when the SO cannot cook to save their damn life-
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hm. i think i am going to stop going to counseling. he does not understand me. he pathologizes things that are not pathological.
#purrs#the premises of counseling / therapy are that you need to have boundaries and be self sufficient and fully healed. FUCK THAT! relationships#are not transactions. we are allowed to need each other. we are allowed to blur lines. we are human and messy. our thoughts and feelings ar#PRECIOUS. im not letting go of my thoughts they mean EVERYTHING to me they are the key to the WORLD. im not letting go of redacted why on#EARTH would i stop redacteding to redacted that is HELPFUL for me. i don’t CARE about the roots. who the fuck is it hurting????? NO ONE!!!!#the way he flat out told me he agrees with my mom. bitch im done forever. im done literaly forever. i don’t know how to tell him but im don#forever. maybe it’s just my id which is what he said to me LMFAO and like maybe i just don’t like being uncomfortable or facing hard truths#but i don’t fucking think it’s TRUE!!!!!!!!!! yeah i need to grow yeah i have unhealthy behaviors. but i don’t need to let go of the whole#THING bc of some arbitrary transactional concept of what relationships are supposed to be / mean. ive NEVER had a counselor try to uproot t#the whole damn thing like omg what is WRONG with you. i#im paying this man $25 a week to UNDERSTAND me and not ONCE have i felt understood by him. counselors can disagree with me but i literally#never feel like he is on my side. he’s adhering to conventional ideas about what parents are supposed to be and friends are supposed to be#and work is supposed to be etc etc. and so patronizingly said just enjoy being 23 you don’t wanna waste your 20s! FUCK YOU. i will not#regret anything even if it’s unusual. FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!#and also i know he probably watches back thru the recordings and has like his supervisor and professors watch them too which means that#there is a whole team of scientists + my family studying me in a lab and thinking im insane and finding ways to tell me. but fucking bold o#him to assume he can give me any meaningful valuable insight when he is actively checking his laptop / phone during our sessions and rarely#if eve gives me a chance to drive MY OWN CONVERSATION THAT IM PAYING FOR and is so phony abt being on the recording. like Omg. maybe im jus#grown out of it. it fucking SUCKS bc i actually have things i am not normal about and really need help with and i can’t actually get help f#from ppl whose job it is to fucking help me bc they think im not normal about things i PROMISEEEE i am normal about. and the way i effectiv#effectively told him that and he responded that he can’t take that credibly bc there’s no action behind it BY WHICH HE MEANS I HAVENT#STOPPED REDACTEDING TO ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT REDACTED IN MY WHOLE LIFE? THAT I HAVENT DECIDED IM DONE LEARNING SND GROWING AND CUT IT#OFF?????? DO YOU FUCKING HEAR YOURSELF. INSANE. the ANTITHESIS of human. we are MEANT TO BE CONNECTED. FUCK!!!!!!!!!#delete later#my old counselors challenged me and disagreed with me b it i never felt like they flat out were unwilling to meet me where i am and#compromise with me. is that not what counselors are supposed to do???? or have i just had bad counselors until now??? because im NORMAL. i#swear to fucking god. im normal. im literally normal and it is not doing ANYONE harm. what is wrong with you. GOD
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finally getting paid by centrelink on halloween..... so as a late birthday gift, I bought myself bullshit jobs by david graeber like I've been meaning to for months..... or really the last year.... to quell the utter bitterness and numbness i felt all through my cadetship last year; and also during my job searching since late march this year.
like is my job or having a job actually worth anything???? am I ever gonna find anything I'm truly passionate about and interested in, to make into a career at all??? is every single fucking job that I apply for a fucking useless soul-sucking role with no real purpose??? why did the putdown in that cadetship job that "you're just back office admin staff, aren't you???? you're useless. where is my housing worker and what use are you telling me that I can't reach them????" hurt so fucking much as if I just wasn't supposed to be there???? (besides the point that that was how my boss basically and the rest of the team really treated me anyway.... which fucking sucked).... just I fucking hate working. and this book is good so far.
#life#about me#shut up ilona#ilona's work dilemmas#ilona's work thoughts#ilona's jobhunting thoughts and woes#also half heard back from the local metal manufacturer that i 'casually interviewed' for lasf friday#...well on seek and it's said thaf my app is unlikely to progress#and tbf i dont mind#bc when i asked 'what challenges does this team face?'#the lady interviewing was like 'well everyday is different and we make it through. if we have a tough client....#....i'd just coach you through it to get over it and on with your tasks#and i felt a bit off with that response tbh
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...
#it's not that I don't want discourse on the issue but I don't feel like putting this where it can be easily reblogged#because I don't have the energy for that#but my most despised of church teachers our regular Sunday School teacher said more stupid things this morning#and I mentioned them to Mom and Dad (hearty agreement from Mom and agreement but observance of line of reasoning from Dad)#but I'm still irritated#we had a prayer request/praise about a friend of a friend of one of the congregation#who was all set to so on some short-term missions trip to Africa when his chronically ill wife was hospitalized with heart issues#life-threatening heart issues that have almost claimed her once or twice before#and she's lying there in the hospital facing surgeries and danger the day before this man's plane is set to leave#and she tells him to go to Africa#I'm not irritated about that as such--it's their relationship they can make their own decisions#but when the teacher asserted THIS WAS GOOD AND RIGHT#that's when I started seeing red my guys#this man. this buffoon. went so far as to say it would have been the right call even if the wife had died#to which I say screw that#are we told to forsake father and mother and brother and all for Christ? do we understand that there will be decisions where we must choose#Christ or comfort and safety? was Abraham's faith challenged up to his own son? yes#but never not once ever in the Bible (that I am aware of and hence invitation to discourse) is a man told to forsake his WIFE#not when they are both living in accordance to God's will and have a godly and healthy relationship#and ESPECIALLY not for the sake of a non-emergency short-term friggin missions trip#ONE FLESH PEOPLE#CLEAVE UNTO HIS WIFE AND THEY TWO SHALL BE ONE FLESH#this idiot said 'because life is temporal and there's heaven' THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU STOP LIVING#this life and its relationships are still VITAL and HOLY and SACRED#it's different for single people and Paul himself acknowledges this repeatedly#does 1 Cor 7 mean nothing?!?#flabbergasted I tell you
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I am so high I love you dabs I love you big bong rips I love you huge heavy bong I love you only having 20 dollars to my name and no plans but getting high and ignoring it I love you oh no I’m thinking about it
#I want to take an ice cold shower and scream and smoke a whole pack of cigarettes and lock myself in a closet for 72 hours in the dark with#no distractions to figure out what I actually want to do with the rest of my life and to face every bad thought I have and struggle to#ignore even years later like ugh I just need to be at the bottom of the ocean floating sinking alive dead in between for like a month and#then pull me back up and either I’ll be normal or I’ll be so fucked up they just put me back in there#like either way I am vibing at the bottom of the ocean (I have been desperately imaging a sensory deprivation tank all day)#(put me in a fucking sensory deprivation tank until something in my fucking brain rewires and I get worse or better than I am now this#inbetween stage is fucking killing me like what do you mean I’m not a horrible person but also what do you mean I struggle every day but I’m#normal but I have things about me other people don’t and alienate me to the point of near total isolation but also this is just how humans#are and I need to take meds and actively struggle to fit into a perfect little box of what a person should be like god damn I am so tired of#getting better and worse and better and worse and better and worse and better and worse and I’m miserable and I’m happy and I’m sobbing and#I know a month from now I’ll be depressed again or I’ll be the best I’ve ever been and it’s so fucking horrible to be in the middle stage#where I actually have to step up and admit shit is wrong and face it like why can’t I just lay in bed forever until I become the bed and not#like get a job and have a future. ugh. depression is so fucked esp bc most things in my life are normal I guess or like easier than my#friends like we all have seperate challenges but I’m the only one still living off their parents (ha. parent. forgot for a second.) and the#only thing wrong with my life is the mental health issues but I won’t step up and deal with it bc I feel like I’ve been depressed for so#long I like fucked up the foundational shit and like I know it’s fine but also I feel so behind and I feel like I’ll be behind and unhappy#forever even when im happy I know the next depressive episode is right around the corner and I give up again. ugh. I hate knowing that’s#what’s wrong with me but still not having the energy to step up and fix it. im so pathetic I want to cry. my brain is me but my brain is#destroying my life. anyways. im high and now im sad and have dry mouth. I think im gonna drink ice water and change into shorts+lay in bed)
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patched up and good to go
#the three things you dont ask: a man's salary a woman's weight#and fenrir why his brother has a broken nose and what happened to vasili's face#oc stuff#royaltines#a scandalous guy. you dont just fall in love with the guy youre protecting#now he needs an entirely new bodyguard bc youre obviously compromised#vasili takes a jab at dusko like oh youre leftovers protecting that piece of shit and dusko is like well at least im not sleeping with him#at least i still have my JOB as a BODYGUARD like we were RAISED no matter i had to switch who im guarding#theyve mettled at tourneys before and theyre fairly equal though vasili has lost more often#mainly bc he has kids and a husband and isnt just dedicating his whole life to training like a certain someone#the fights take foreeeever tho theyre too equal so when vasili decides to challenge dusko everyone groans#so sometimes his husband just says babe dont fight this time and hes a bit mad but okay#'i dont want you to get hurt' he says but he just doesnt want to watch him and his rival smack each other around for 45 minutes
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Don't skip please,
It's urgent !!
Help Us survive the devastating GazaWar
✅ Verified campaign – please check vetteing section below 🔍
My husband Mohanad and I both worked as administrators at the Palace of Justice in Gaza.
We got engaged just two months before the war,
bought an apartment, and began dreaming of a new life together. But the war changed everything. Our workplace and apartment were destroyed, and we lost our jobs. Despite it all, we chose to move forward and got married in the middle of the war, with no wedding ceremony—just a simple union that symbolized resilience amid the devastation.
We’ve been displaced multiple times, each time facing a new eviction order and starting over again. We were forced to leave everything behind and flee with only a few belongings. The displacement was devastating, as we had to leave behind the life we built and the dreams we held for our future.
Today, we live in a small home in Al-Nuseirat, struggling to cover basic needs like food, water, and alternative electricity, facing monthly expenses we can hardly bear. Recently, a new eviction notice was issued for our area, and we don’t know what lies ahead. We’re searching for online work and have skills we can utilize, but finding opportunities has been very challenging under these conditions.
After renting the apartment in Nuseirat, we thought we had found a safe haven from the horrors of war. But on the night of 3-11-2024, explosions erupted nearby, and we never imagined one would hit our apartment. Suddenly, a missile struck; walls shook, parts collapsed, and windows shattered, leaving the room we had just been in destroyed.
We miraculously survived, but the place that once felt like a refuge had become a scene of chaos and destruction. With heavy hearts, we gathered what little remained and moved on once again, hoping to find shelter far from this endless devastation.
Vetted by Butterfly project, Number (#1184) on this list
Vetted by @gazavetters, Number (#42) on this list
Vetted by @90-ghost in this post
Vetted by association in this post
To donate:
Any support would be a new source of hope for us.
Mohanad & farah
Update
On 28-11-2024, our home was shelled for the second time and struck by an artillery shell. We were trying to rebuild our lives amidst all the challenges, but today, our home has turned into rubble once again. 🥺🥺 The dream of safety is fading, and the suffering continues to grow. We need your support to stand on our feet again 💔💔
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