#cbs the amazing race

[strawberrysapphocake]

[residueofsomething]

Special: 2024 TV/Film Watchlist

Inspired by all the ranking videos and awards shows about putting different types of media into categories, I have started my own media watchlist for this year. Disclaimer: this is purely my skewed opinion with no credible professional education in media. This is also temporary for the time being, because my opinion like yours will change and change. That is why I am only listing media that was…

[willowmosby]

In general I am for long (20-24 episodes) seasons of television instead of short seasons. But also there is too much. Like I have too many choices.

Do I rewatch all of Buffy the vampire and it's spin off Angel. Or black sails or how I met your mother or Phineas and Ferb.

Do I finally catch up on law and order SVU or criminal minds?

Do I actually get around to finishing person of interest or lost or the dragon prince?

Do I watch Homicide:life on the streets, or west wing or nobody wants this or English teacher?

None of that is even considering reality tv like survivor or the amazing race or longform YouTube videos

Life is long but streaming services are expensive and decision paralysis has really got me down

[jtl-fics]

I feel like in the miracle season of the amazing race Aaron would absolutely be so bitter that Andrew has a perfect memory and he doesn't. Any time there is a memory challenge the foxes work together against Andrew and Neil to even the playing field

The Foxes are all gunning for Neil and Andrew once the Ravens are out of the Race. Neil and Andrew have all the benefits. Phil likes them, their combined abilities make them a threat, and they won the first leg by like 8 hours which was......... INFURIATING.

1. Bragging rights

2. Everyone bet on themselves as the winner

3. Bragging rights

4. For Aaron and Katelyn they want the money

5. Have I mentioned the bragging rights? All of them just want to say "Wow, we beat you when you had practice before. Hm." They all want to say it so bad.

[mermaidsirennikita]

I saw your ranking of Kresley Cole's IAD women. Do you have a favorite male character?

Yeah, I have a few. I mean, it's cliche to say this because he's like... an obvious fan favorite... But if I was really being honest, Lothaire is likely my favorite. I mean, I think he's the most developed character in the series (and once Nix gets her book, God willing, maybe she'll junior or exceed him). But he's also just so funny, and so insane, and unfortunately, very hot. How can I not love a dude who, when his pseudo-girlfriend (at the time) gets mad at him for mercilessly beheading a bunch of shifters, says it's "not like I'm going around cockslapping gnomes"? How can you expect me to not love someone who describes skull-fucking randoms as his "mischievous youth"???

And while I do think his romance is INCREDIBLE and part of why I love Lothaire is that he loves Ellie so much and I also love Ellie so much... I mean. He's one of the best parts of Dreams of a Dark Warrior, an UNDERRATED CLASSIC. He gets tortured by Declan Chase and talks about how long it took someone to cut his dick off with whip lashes once, because it's sooooo big (and since regenerated). He kicks Thad off a cliff and then Thad becomes HIS ONLY FRIEND LMAO. He wears a Panama hat??? Like Stede in that episode of Our Flag Means Death??? He blackmails Declan Chase, a man who hates all monsters, into letting him tap his blood on demand and GETS A BONER WHILE DOING IT (bi Lothaire confirmed). Regin screams to Declan about how Lothaire drinking Declan's blood means he now has Declan's memories of Declan and Regin fucking, and he walks up like "Oh nO WORRIES, I have already WATCHED YOU TWO FUCK A MILLION TIMES IN REAL LIFE LIKE A CREEP". The entire WEIRD boy's club scene where Lothaire gives Declan advice about negging Regin into forgiving him and everyone goes "Oh shit, that's great advice actually" and iT WORKS.

(And then later he gives Trehan advice about Bettina... and it works. And he gives Munro advice about Kereny... and it works. The point is that Lothaire can not do his own relationship to save his life which is why he literally lets his lungs explode in order to win Ellie's favor back, he doesn't even know how to get Ellie to forgive him without near-death.)

But I mean. There are so many heroes I love in that series, just like I love so many heroines. Like I said, I haven't given an IAD book less than 4 stars. They really work for me.

Other standout heroes for me would be like... Garreth MacRieve who I think is probably one of the best boyfriends? Of the series? Like, does he hunt Lucia across the world for a year while she's desperately trying to evade him? Sure. Does he sorta try to seduce her into breaking her supernatural vow of chastity? Yes, he does. Does e not care about her god-given mission at all because women shouldn't have to have jobs? Yeah, and maybe HE WAS RIGHT. But he's also soooo sexy, and sooooo wolfy and sooooo loyal and sooooo romantic. The butterfly he named after her! Garreth SMELLING Lucia masturbating and having a freakout because he's in a cage and she's upstairs and SHE SHOULD NOT HAVE TO GET HERSELF OFF NO SHE IS PRINCESS! Him holding his werewolfitude back as long as possible until he's like "fuck it I can't deal" and runs howling through the jungle for her??? The ENTIRE VALKYRIE PLOT OF "OH WE'LL JUST HAVE LUCIA FEEL PAIN ON PURPOSE SO THE WOLF GUY COMES TO SAVE HER"??? "She was born to be found by me"??? "Werewolves are natural investigators" lOL I CAN'T. Child-free by choice, but would have Garreth MacRieve's 7 werewolf children.

Conrad Wroth, who I think is just like.... a ragged open wound of insanity and romantic longing and pent up sexual energy... Like, Conrad has one of theeee hottest biting scenes in the series, imo. And also, just the sad hilarity of him swearing his chastity to a cult of vampire hunters, then getting forcibly turned into a vampire by his brothers and doomed to centuries of virginity??? And then he does meet his Bride and she's a GHOST??? *Curb Your Enthusiasm theme plays*

Rydstrom Woede is.... really hot... I love a morally upright man driven to horrible crimes. The minute Rydstrom THE GOOD BROTHER showed up in Cade's book, shirtless, tired, scratches all over his chest, with a woman screaming in the background like "HELP!!!" while he goes "don't. ask." I was gone. Then he turned out to be a legit DADDY who's into spanking and punishing Sabine and he feels gross and weird about it? Please. Theeeeen his first real smile in his own book is when she flips him off? PLEEEEEEEASE.

And of course, Uilleam "Will" MacRieve, "MacRieve", The MacRieve, of the novel titled MacRieve. I mean, listen, he's hot. He has such rough animalistic sex CONSISTENTLY that they call him Bucket List. But he's soooo sad. And don't get me wrong, he does some fucked up shit and I won't deny it. But his backstory. Made me cry lol. His entire journey. Made me cry. Him on his knees crying into Chloe's stomach because he wants to be better and heal for her but he can't??? Made me cry. His journey isn't for everyone, but I found it gorgeous. And also, did I laugh so much when they were like "well MacRieve, your woman needs sex healing, and we can't trust you to do it, so I don't know man maybe she needs to be double-teamed by some incubi" and he literally flinched because his inner werewolf instinct went SCREAMING at him??? Yes I did. He had no thoughts for like a solid five minutes. Just static.

... so those are my top 5... I also very much love all the other Wroth brothers (my 1D), Lachlain MacRieve (crazy werewolf king turned "Mature Dad Friend"), Bowen MacRieve (the original fuckboy/BEAST FAMILIAR), Trehan Daciano ("babe look I got you this bag of... severed heads... oh.... that wasn't...... the request..."), Rune Darklight (cue the TWO STANDING OVATIONS HE GOT FROM BITCHES HE'D FUCKED LMAO), and uh......... Declan Chase (..... I won't be defending this choice). And THAD, even though Thad isn't a hero. YET!

[reclusivedouche]

CBS reality tv is really getting in the way of me actually starting my post-finale riverdale rewatch

[unlimitedsupplies]

tv networks: see because of the writer's strike we've had to change our fall line-up so big brother runs for two extra weeks and amazing race episodes are going to be 90 minutes long :( :(

me: wow what a delightful reward for supporting strikers i see genuinely no downsides

[photo-roulette-wheel]

The Amazing Race All stars 2014

[leoleofitz]

Never so deeply understood the word 'flabbergasted' as when a 25 year old martian man told me he's never heard of the TV show Survivor . Like. !!???!

[manleycollins]

CBS Amazing Race

Congratulations Greg and John for winning the CBS Amazing Race. My first time seeing African-Americans win.

[1ts-a-fuck1ng-st1ck]

me watching the amazing race 5: WHY GO ON THE AMAZING RACE WHEN YOU COULD OF WENT TO THERAPY

[strawberrysapphocake]

“Holiday Surprise”—please, Julie. I’m so tired. Please, just let me rest /j.

[delicatebarness]

cry baby | chapter twenty

Summary: The aftermath of CB & Peter's weekend away.

Warning: Mean Bucky is back.

Word Count: 1039

Spotify Playlist | Support: Ko-FI

Series Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

A/N: I'm so sorry this one took so long to come out and it's only a short one. OH ALSO, we have @scraftsku35 to thank for this one because they changed the characters fated while we were discussing this chapter. - Please feel free to leave feedback or let me know where and how you want the story to continue, this is just as much yours as it is mine. - B

Tags: @buckys0whore | @thezombieprostitute | @lanabuckybarnes | @mishkatelwarriorgoddess | @softieekayy | @noonespecial90 | @hello-therree | @randomawesomeperson102 | @whoreforbarnes | @thejutvtsupport | @somnorvos | @cjand10 | @plasticbottleholder | @birdenthusiastez4

Everything: @hallecarey1 | @pattiemac1 | @uhmellamoanna | @scraftsku35 | @ozwriterchick

You sat with Natasha and Wanda on your couch that following Monday evening. Steve and Sam were engaged in a playful debate across the room as Bucky quietly observed, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips while Alpine snuggled into him. 

After a few moments, Wanda exchanged a mischievous glance with Natasha as she stood before disappearing into the kitchen. Your eyes widened as she returned with a cake, reading the word “Virgin” written on black icing with a red prohibited symbol across it. The room fell silent as she walked over to you, handing you the cake, a sly grin spread across her face. 

“Congratulations, CB!” Natasha exclaimed, her eyes sparkling with mischief. 

Your face turned as crimson as the icing as you took the cake. You glanced around the room. “What is this?” you asked, swallowing the lump in your throat.

“Well, after we heard about your little weekend with Peter,” Wanda chimed in, her laughter infectious. “We thought you might appreciate a bit of humor, it’s just a little joke.” 

Sam burst into laughter, nearly doubling over as he made his way over you. “Oh man, this is too good!” he laughed, wiping tears from his eyes as he took the cake from your hands. “You guys went all out, huh?” 

Suddenly, a bitter laugh was let out over by Bucky. “Peter? The so-called gentleman? Oh, he’s always such a nice guy…” Sarcasm dripped from his voice as a smirk mashed over his face. “Bet the twink only got two pumps in.” 

A surge of defiance coursed through you as you decided to go along with the charade. “Actually, Bucky, Peter was amazing,” you said, you tried to keep your voice steady as your heart raced. “Not that it’s any of your business.” 

Steve’s face darkened, his haw tensed as his eyes blazed with barely controlled anger. He didn’t say anything but his protective instinct was evident. The furious look on his face spoke volumes. 

Bucky’s smirk faltered before he made another sarcastic comment. “Well, I’m glad you had your fairy tale moment,” he muttered, standing up and wandering over to the kitchen. 

“Oh, it was magical…” you trailed off, “I just, I couldn’t take it all… if you know what I mean.” 

His smirk returned, though it was colder this time and his eyes darkened. “Sure, we all know Peter’s got that ‘magic touch’.” Opening the fridge, he rummaged through its contents searching for another beer. His eyes landed on a six-pack of canned cherry cola, pulling it out, he turned to face you. 

“Cans?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “You hate it canned. What’s it doing in your fridge?” 

A pang of guilt dawned over you, knowing Peter had bought it for you without knowing you only liked it from glass bottles. “Peter bought me it,” you replied nonchalantly. “It was a nice gesture.” 

His grip tightened on the can, and his knuckles whitened. “Of course he did,” he muttered, putting the cola back and grabbing his beer. 

Natasha and Wanda exchanged glances, and their joking demeanor shifted to one of concern as they noticed the growing tension in the apartment. Sam, still chuckled to himself at the dining table while stuffing his face with the cake. Steve, remained silent, his jaw clenched and his eyes fixed on you– A storm brewing behind them. 

As Bucky returned to the living room, he took a long swig of beer before flopping back on the couch. “You know,” he began, his tone laced with sarcasm, “if Peter is so great, maybe he should’ve bought the right cola.” 

Anger surged through you as Bucky continued with his jabs. “At least Peter tries to be nice,” you snapped back. “What‘s the matter? Are you only a ‘two-pump’ kinda guy? It’s okay if you are, I’m sure Leah doesn’t mind.” 

His smirk turned icy. “Yeah right, I always get my girl to finish.” 

An unexpected pang of pain cut deeply into your heart at the use of ‘my girl’. Scoffing you were determined to maintain your facade. “Only once?” you questioned. “Not that it’s a competition, James, but Peter got me to finish three times…” 

The tension thickened in the room, his smirk wavered as he tightened his jaw. Steve’s silence was deafening. Standing, his presence commanded the room, and its attention. 

“That’s enough!” Steve’s voice cut through the room, booming with a sharp edge, simmering with restrained rage. “Come on, Bucky, we’ve got to go.” His expression left no room for debate as he looked over at Bucky. 

With one last glare toward you, Bucky stood, draining his beer before resting the empty bottle on the coffee table. Too consumed with his own emotions, he missed the quiet meow in protest from Alpine. 

Steve didn’t say a word as he opened the apartment door, his eyes burnt with anger. 

The room was left in an awkward silence, the laughter and teasing from earlier now a distant memory. Clearing her throat, Natasha spoke up trying to lighten the mood. “So, Peter was that good, huh?”

“I wouldn’t know, I couldn’t go through with it,” you admitted quietly, the lie weighing heavily on your chest. 

Wanda’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Wait, what? What do you mean?” she asked, concern tinged in her voice.

You sighed. “I didn’t sleep with Peter,” you confessed, your gaze dropped to Alpine as she brushed her head against your leg. “I pretended I did because Bucky was annoying me, but…” You trailed off, unsure of how to explain the mess. 

Natasha’s expression softened as she reached over to squeeze your hand, reassuringly. “It’s okay,” she said gently, “he was being a jerk.” 

“Hey Wands, where’s this cake from?” Sam’s voice was muffled but cheerful, he startled you as you thought he left with your brother and Bucky. “I want some for the next time I get–” 

He paused mid-sentence, noticing the absence of Steve and Bucky. He hastily swallowed the cake in his mouth, his head turned toward where the two had previously been sat. Frosting remained around his lips. “Wait, where’d Steve and Buck go?” 

Suppressing a sigh, Natasha and Wanda exchanged a look, realizing Sam had missed the entire drama. 

---

Series Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

[milaeth]

୨୧┊𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒. ( lando norris )

ꖛ ─ you’re reading part one ∿ part two ( coming soon )

✧.* pairings ─ lando norris x fem! football player! reader

✧.* genre ─ social media au ⨾ fluff

✧.* summary ─ in which you're a football player and after winning the champions league with your team, a secret admirer named "L" sends you flowers. everyone thinks it's your friend Lance, but what if it's someone else? perhaps someone who’s also a formula one driver and is known for being a big fan of yours...

✧.* face claim ─ jana fernández (she’s obv around the same age as lando in this)

✧.* warnings ─ none

✧.* mily’s thoughts ─ so sorry for the wait, i had to take a little break, but i’m back now! btw i’ve had this in my drafts for literal months, but i finally decided to post it so enjoy :)

yourusername

liked by lance_stroll, fcbfemeni and 753,965 others

yourusername We rocked the semi finals, now it’s time for the actual one! We can do this!!🔥

tagged: @/fcbfemeni @/wchampionsleague

view all 375 comments . . .

user1604 massive win! some sick tackles made by you today, wow. so proud of you guys🔵🔴

user693 LETS GOOOO

lance_stroll So proud of you💙❤️

yourusername Thank you Lance❤️

user4635 y’all seeing this???

user8476 the hearts…🤭

user4316 BARCELONA 🔛🔝

user1036 mother is mothering‼️

landonorris Congratulations, you guys were amazing!👏

liked by yourusername

user5837 YOU GUYS WILL ROCK THE FINAL

fcbfemeni best cb in laliga🔥🔵🔴

yourusername best club💙❤️

user3835 devoured and left no crumbs

user8547 who is that girl and why are lance and lando always in her likes and comments??

user9527 girl bffr💀

user1584 “that girl” is Y/n mf L/n.

user5264 @user8547 That is Y/n L/n! She plays for Barcelona’s women's team. She and Lance have been friends for quite a while and I guess he introduced her to the other drivers at some point because a lot of them follow her. She's been to a few races and sometimes still attends them when she's not playing for Barcelona! :)

2 May 2023

landonorris just added to their story . . .

liked by mclaren, fcbfemeni and 97,537 others

private replies to this story . . .

maxfewtrell Off to go see the love of your life play?👀

landonorris Shut up mate

maxfewtrell You didn’t deny it👀

landonorris Dude she doesn’t even know I exist

maxfewtrell Of course she knows you exist. She’s friends with Lance and therefore knows you from the grid.

landonorris Yeah okay but that’s about it. The first and only time we talked in person was in 2020 so she probably forgot about my existence.

maxfewtrell Well then change that😉

yourusername

liked by alexiaputellas, wchampionsleague and 1,846,053 others

yourusername This feels unreal🏆🔵🔴

tagged: @/fcbfemeni @/wchampionsleague

show top comments . . .

lance_stroll I’m literally so proud of you. We have to celebrate this, love you💙

yourusername Thank you so much, can’t wait to see you again💙

user836 @lance_stroll confess to her already🙄🙄

user638 i ship them so hard

landonorris This was the first football game I watched live and the atmosphere was amazing. Great win💙❤️

yourusername Our games always have an amazing atmosphere, it’s really worth it

landonorris I could tell! Today’s game won’t be the last one I’ll see live

yourusername I hope so :)

user9526 AYO WHAT IS GOING ON

9 May 2023

yourusername just added to their story . . .

liked by lance_stroll, landonorris and 352,942 others

11 May 2023

∿ taglist ─ @ay7ton @ch3rryknots @fdl305 @chrysanthemonza @remuslupinsbtch @kissesandmartinis @hevburn @noncannonships @quadrisl @dhhdhsiavdhaj @godessstela @hectorr-19 @layazul @bambispostsblog @ferrariloverr @xxenia14 @sigistarkstrom @asparklysoul @dinodumbass @tpwkstiles @our-love-world @sainzluvrr @ophcelia @mcmuppet ( here’s my taglist if you want to get tagged in my future work )

don’t forget to like, comment & reblog (it’s very much appreciated <3).

© milaeth | 2023

[anhed-nia]

R.O.T.O.R. -- AGAIN!

Even ripoffs can be beautiful.

I am writing about R.O.T.O.R., neither for the first time nor the last, because something new strikes me about this startling movie every time I see it. Its amazing premise, which amply rips off THE TERMINATOR and JUDGE DREDD (but not ROBOCOP, oddly, which began shooting after R.O.T.OR., also in Dallas) provides fertile ground for all sorts of useful interpretation. This time I was most struck by the fact that R.O.T.O.R. is all about jobs and going to work.

The story concerns "police scientist" Captain Coldyron (cold-iron) who has invented the Robotic Officer Tactical Operations Research/Reserve, a T-800 type of android made out of a "self-teaching alloy" that can kick anybody's ass. Coldyron resigns in a huff when his boss conspires with local politicians to rush the lawbot to market, and the project races forward dysfunctionally until R.O.T.O.R. inevitably busts lose and starts killing people for minor mischief. Coldyron hooks up with the robot's coauthor Dr. Steel (female bodybuilder Jayne Smith who is like something out of Crying Freeman, which I mean as the highest compliment) to hunt their creation down and destroy it.

Coldyron is played by Richard Gesswein, who was also created in a lab.

That might sound pretty action-packed, but in execution R.O.T.O.R. is heavily focused on the drudgery of daily life. Enormous amounts of time are spent walking through parking lots, traversing the atria of hotels, finding parking, being seated in restaurants, and most of all, spending hours and hours at work, making countless phone calls. You have never seen so many people on the phone in a movie in your entire life. There's work phones, home phones, payphones, and even CB radios. At times it feels as if you may never see more than one person on the same set again. On the phones, people say things to each other that have already been said earlier in the movie if not earlier in the same scene, if not earlier in the same monologue. In the scene where Coldyron learns that R.O.T.O.R. has gone rogue, he delivers this incredible screed during one of THREE calls that he makes in a row:

"Its last program was prime directive... Prime directive to our ROTOR unit is judge and execute. It stops felons, judges the crime, and executes sentence. Justice served, COD. You call the Senator and you tell him ROTOR walked through a busload of nuns to get to a jaywalker, with malice towards no one. It won't stop. It wasn't ready. Its brain functions are incomplete. It can't think twice, can't reason, can't change its prime directive. It's like a chainsaw set on frappe..."

It begins to feel as if he will never stop reiterating whatever he (and others) just said, and this is not the only such example.

Most of these calls, like all of the activity in the movie, are focused on jobs. Coldyron calls his girlfriend first thing in the morning to tell her that he is getting ready for work, and to ask her if she is also getting ready to go to work at her own job. He promises that "if you're a good girl and go to work" then he will grill steaks at her house later. When he goes out to buy charcoal for the reward steaks he stumbles upon two creeps robbing the store and trying to take a hostage--a woman who stops the crime with several karate kicks, to whom he says "Hey lady, you want a job?" Meanwhile at the police robot lab, a scientist slaves away while complaining about the impossible new R.O.T.O.R. deadline as the comic relief security bot whines, sighs, and says "One of these days I'm gonna quit this job!" (Later on he actually does) Once R.O.T.O.R. has escaped we meet the Linda Hamilton of this movie (Margaret Trigg), who is having a vicious fight in the car with her fiance because she wants to get a job; the fiance wants to forgo the "barbaric ritual" of the wedding and just be automatically married to a woman who will not embarrass him by getting a job. Finally he concedes, "Elope with me tonight and I'll help you get a job after the honeymoon," but it's too late for all that because he's speeding and about to get killed by R.O.T.O.R.

For extra job-related realism there is workplace harassment in the form of a guy who tries to fuck his colleague by describing ancient execution methods and who calls her a white supremacist for turning him down (he says he's Native American, she says he's not, I don't know the right answer because this is the actor's only credit--and actually he's uncredited for the role, though he is acknowledged for composing the movie's primitive synth soundtrack which I kind of enjoy). It's also worth mentioning that the comedy droid is a real robot with a job, according to iMDB (sadly there is not a wealth of info on this movie):

"Willard the Robot is played by APD2, a robot purchased in 1986 by the police department of the Town of Addison, a northern suburb of Dallas, for $17,750 (approximately $41,000 in 2018 dollars). APD2/Willard performed public relations duties and was tapped to lead the Christmas parade in Addison that year. His contributions to actual law enforcement and his subsequent whereabouts are unknown. "As quoted from 'theoldrobots' website; 'Officer Willi from 1985 - This 21st Century Robotics robot was operated by remote control, showed videos about public safety, and was used in teaching important safety topics such as stranger awareness, traffic safety, and much more..'"

Coldyron is actually a very good prototype of the modern tech mogul who has way too much time on his hands and whose existence is mainly composed of heroic fantasies about himself, whether he is molding the future face of law enforcement, or dicking around on his enormous ranch where he lamely practices his lasso technique on tree stumps before blowing them up with dynamite. At the office he demands "hydrogenated wheat germ and dessicated liver" which boosts his handball game, and I thought, jesus christ I think I've worked for this guy. Coldyron is *I think* the hero of this movie but I'm never sure how much you're really supposed to like him; when his girlfriend sends him out for charcoal so he can cook her reward steaks, he goes to a mini mart and just starts looking for trouble, harassing minorities and flashing his gun. It's like, this is the reason there are loitering laws, but naturally they don't apply when you're a rich cop.

Someone please make these stickers!

The best way to understand R.O.T.O.R. is through the knowledge that director and co-writer Cullen Blaine worked on a variety of popular cartoon shows during what they call "the dark age of animation". First of all, there are scenes in this movie whose aesthetic, humor, and internal logic only begin to make sense if you imagine them taking place in an episode of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles--and actually much if not all of the dialog was dubbed by a whole other cast due to problems with getting the stars back for ADR, creating a whole other layer of literal cartoonishness. But the period in which Cullen Blaine created R.O.T.O.R. and designed many children's shows was dominated by what's called "limited animation" which I almost don't even have to describe. It's all in the name, the goal was to do things as cheaply as possible while turning out dozens of episodes per season. Part of the problem was, as with all things, Ronald Reagan, whose deregulation activities defanged measures to make sure children's programming was not just a steady stream of hard sell marketing. Under Reagan, the requirement for some portion of programs to be educational became so easy to meet and manipulate that animation studios were compelled to crank out zillions of Trojan horse toy ads with glib moral declarations tacked on. (I think I understand this correctly, I'm sure @bogleech has better material on the subject) Animators are a historically abused lot with a sad history of failed strikes, and I'm just extrapolating here, but I bet it's reasonable to guess that R.O.T.O.R. reflects the filmmaker's experiences in the grueling cartoon mines. The brutal sacrifice of quality to speed, the hostile work environments, and the endless, redundant calls and meetings, all smack of a script by someone who has had a very bad job.

"We've all got plenty of time to figure out what this means to each one of us," Coldyron sagely concludes at the end of his misadventure. Obviously I am still working on what it means to me, since this is the fourth or fifth time I've seen this movie and (at least?) the second time I'm writing about it. I will say that while the film I have just described sounds intolerably boring--I mean, a whole movie about rat race drudgery with the fewest and least convincing action sequences ever--but believe me, it is not boring. R.O.T.O.R. is constantly surprising and fascinating, with weirdly vivid imagery and pages and pages of the strangest dialog you will hear anywhere. Just watch the movie and let it shock you. You'll have plenty of time to figure out what it means to you later.

[wonderful-magician]

My rewrite of starlight express except it's just a detailed song list

Disclaimer: this is just for fun! And also some mentions of the race 4 crash and the stuff surrounding it. Along with characters like greaseball and Electra in not so pretty lights. Though I believe they both improve as people and are good people after the show!

You can completely ignore this post! If I sound a bit negative at all just know that starlight express is literally my favorite thing in the world right now and I would give every character a smooch on the forehead.

Basically I have my dream song list that has no rules. No time constraints just fully compliant to my AU. Mostly inspired by Broadway, the Vegas pre-recorded races, 2015 Bochum and original London. All horribly mashed together with glitter glue. (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠) Except instead of just showing off my dream song list. I'm also going to explain how each song played out in a setting that one could call a movie or tv show. I was originally going to draw every song but that's simply an exhausting sounding idea when I've already started a project for drawing every character.. anyway, to my ranting!

No control sequence

My Starlight express doesn't take place in a child's imagination. Instead of a full control sequence. We just get AI control announcing the national race!

Rolling stock

Rolling stock takes place early in the morning. Rusty wakes up early to watch the diesels get pumped and ready in the early hours. As rusty still has some time before he needs to grab the coaches for the busy day. And he somberly watches the big strong diesels.. greaseball is mostly hidden by the shadows but looks absolutely awesome! Featuring his great shades even though it's dark out.

Call me rusty/new intro song

Rusty no longer gets mocked immediately by the diesels. Instead rusty skates off to wake up and grab the coaches. The disgruntled and unprepared coaches whine and warn rusty about the day as they know his plans to race. Call me rusty is a great intro song for rusty and it wouldn't mind the original being used. Though truly I feel like rusty just deserves a good I want song that's more clear about his desire to win the races to prove the power of steam! ( His wish is to win! Not get pearl. )

Lotta locomotion

The introduction for the girls. They sing a lotta locomotion while rusty pulls them to the main yard but keeps taking detours. Trying to show off his skills yet the girls keep mentioning that he's simply not a popular engine nor is he very attractive to most train standards. Though pearl is silent and somber whenever it's brought up ( she likes him )

Shortened he whistled at me, new lyrics

Once they reach the yard. Rusty rushes off to get the freight and leaves the coaches in the main yard alone. Pearl gets in an argument with Buffy and Ashley. As she defends rusty from their criticism. And Dinah just shakes her head. Pearl sings an improved solo about her desire for an engine to whistle at her. ( Implying it's rusty. )

Freight

Pearls solo is suddenly interrupted by a loud horn. As the freight train is pulled in by rusty. The girls mock the freight trucks and the trucks mock the coaches. Though they have a friendly relationship even if they mock each other. Insert the introductionsss. Once freight ends. They start to rally for the noon race.

National engines

Standard national introductions. Not much to say.

AC/DC

Electra and the components show up fashionably late for the races. Electra is introduced as powerful and show stopping like always. A superstar that wasn't even expected to appear. Electra's hypnotizing powers are shown more clearly. As he magnetizes and influences pearl. And she's amazed by him. To Rusty's distaste.

Pumping Iron

Electra is suddenly interrupted by greaseball. Who had been watching from afar since the nationals. greaseball attracts Dinah and pearl, all the components, and CB and flat-top. Greaseball is shown to be the leader of the diesels and the strongest in the yard.

Coda freight

Electra and greaseball start to tussle as they are both strong engines desiring attention and leadership. And they challenge each other to the race. Rusty interrupts them and they mock him. Before they start the march.

Pearl you're honored

Everybody needs a partner. Pearl is invited by Electra ( purse.. ) to race. Pearl originally refuses but purse gets Electra himself to make an appearance. And his magnetism begins.

rewrite of make up my heart

The song is remade to be both a pearl solo. And somewhat a gag song. For pearl is shown having a dilemma. Wanting to race with rusty but she is being hypnotized to race with Electra slowly as the song continues. Everytime she turns to face the two boys they are behaving. And Electra looks favorable, rusty looks rather lame. But when she turns- Electra is mocking rusty and pushing him around with purse. The other components come out and pearl decides to race with Electra. Rusty is heartbroken.

Race 1

There's me

Dinah is upset with greaseball cheating during race 1. ( Not realizing that CB was the main one actively cheating for GB. She's just mad that GB hit a national. ) she cries and takes a break from GB. And is comforted by CB who is upset to see his closest friend crying. The song is more comedy focused. Putting emphasis on the silly ways CB tries to help Dinah. Which cheers her up.

Poppas blues

CB helps Dinah back to the coaches. And we follow him and rusty return to the main yard. Where poppa has appeared to endorse rusty for wanting to race. And sings his song while the freight dance. By the end of it. He realizes that rusty is upset. And finds out that rusty is super upset and hurt from being mocked and left. Poppa decides to race in Rusty's place ( to Rusty's dismay. ) and races with Belle the sleeping car...

Belle the sleeping car

Belle is shown sleeping and poppa wakes her up. She sings her song. ( Rusty has some less than stellar words to say. Even though she's implied to be his adoptive mother of sorts. ) And she goes off with poppa to race.

Crazy and engine of love tidbit

Rusty approaches pearl again. Begging her to race with him instead so that poppa and Belle don't race. She calls him crazy and the song starts. As he tries to court her back ( with a lil bit of engine of love. ) She gets close to saying yes but is pulled away by the other coaches.

Starlight express

Rusty, defeated after being rejected and mocked so much during the day. Sings starlight express as the day ends. And he falls asleep knowing the next day will have the next race. ( And he's worried about poppa, and pearl. )

Race 2

The OLC rap/silver dollar

After poppa Is injured from the race but places first place. They debate if rusty can replace him in the lineup. As they debate. The grand prize is revealed. ( And the people who want it most. Are hinted. ) Rusty couples up with CB, who supports his ability to race throughout the rap.

Rewritten pearl twirl

Greaseball and Electra get in a tussle. GB bonks Electra on the head and his magnetism ceases. Pearl gets mad at Electra and moves to go to rusty. Before she's stopped by greaseball. He flirts with her and she's receptive ( who wouldn't be. ) Dinah is heartbroken by greaseball but he claims it's just some fun and it'll only be for the race. And pearl doesn't say anything to Dinah

Uncoupled

Dinah sings a sadder version of uncoupled. ( I hate it when she's treated like comedy relief! ) as she's upset that she feels betrayed by her boyfriend and her best friend. And she sings of her feelings of low worth.

Girls rolling stock

Ashley and buffy come over to comfort Dinah after they see her crying. They're both mad that greaseball treated her in such a way. ( It's also implied that Buffy and Ashley are a couple. ) and they mention some boundaries that need to be set. Before cheering her up with a song.

Dinah you're honored

Purse collects Dinah to race with Electra. ( Who was still upset about losing pearl ) And she doesn't put up a fight.

wide smile

CB is shown alone. Before he's trailing GB. And speaking to Electra through his radio. Before assuring greaseball that he's still working with him. Before skating off to Electra. And sharing his plans to crash Rusty and steal the silver dollar to Electra. Electra is shocked and allured by the plan. And trusts CB even as CB sings of his crimes. The components are distrustful of CB.

Race 3

Right place right time

The Rockies come in to explain to rusty that the system is broken. And that he'll never win because the rich and the popular control who wins and who loses. and rusty simply has no chance in ever winning against somebody like Electra or greaseball. As rusty is still reeling from being injured and betrayed by CB.

Starlight sequence

Rusty is defeated after the Rockies finish their song. And he sits down in pain from his injuries and his mental exhaustion. He screams for the starlight express and is visited by them. They inform him that he doesn't need help. and simply needs to believe in himself and do what he needs to. As the tides are in his favor.

Dustin/Dinah's disco

Dustin also had seen the starlight express. And is found by rusty. The two confide in each other for being mocked by the others. And they partner up for the last race. / Dinah rejects and yells at Electra for being a jerk. And a whiny brat. Electra is hurt ( despite it being deserved as he won't stop talking about getting second place. And deserving to get first. ) couples with CB. ( To the components dismay )

Race 4

One rock and roll too many

After the horrific crash that occurred during race 4. CB, Electra and greaseball are utterly miserable. Nearly shutting down as their bodies are wired together somewhat and broken. CB is the weakest. But they sing their song in sadness. And the silver dollar is yanked from CB after he passed out.

Only he snippit

Back to pearl. Pearl is shown singing a few lyrics from only he as she is alone. And reflecting over what happened during the races and before.

Only you

The duet between Rusty and Pearl. Pearl declares she will try her best to not let others stop her from staying with rusty. And rusty declares he'll protect her. Smooch smooch ( I LOVE THEM )

Ending dialogue

Poppa is stern with CB. And gives the silver dollar to rusty. The components are harsh to their master and teach him a few words. And Dinah makes up with GB. Saying they need to set each other's boundaries more. But she still loves him ( and he still loves her. Smooch. ) and he apologizes for cheating and messing around.

Light at the end of the tunnel

Honestly this song gives me major during the credits so just imagine a bumping credits scroll lmao. Even better? One of those 2010 animated movie dancing credits shdhdbdb

OKKK IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS ASK ME I LOVE TALKING (⁠θ⁠‿⁠θ⁠) this was fun to write. I REALLY LOVE TALKING I might make more posts like this but I'm unsure