#cause it's not my home anymore
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and no matter what
i know i'll never be able to go back
#nostalgia#homesick#i just miss my home is all#and i can never go back#cause it's not my home anymore#billy joel#13 going on 30#garden state
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doing random sketches while having vinesauce's playthrough of mother 3 in the bg :]
decided to add color to this one in particular cuz I had nothing better to do
#I don't have it in me to play through the game myself cause some of it be hitting a *bit* too close to home but I like watching others play#mother 3#lucas mother 3#claus mother 3#earthbound#mother series#tw blood#with the bajillion filters and junk it doesn't look like it anymore but yk just to be safe ig#idr the name of it rn but I based it off that one painting of a king cradling his dying son in his arms after accidentally killing him#idk I just thought it was fitting lol#my art shit
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Broke: Smash the world's shell.
Woke: Burn through the VHS tape; Escape the narrative!
#nanami kiryuu#revolutionary girl utena#rgu#my art#when you go to leave the panopticon and it starts raining....#yellow rain jacket its intentionally giving horror protagonist#realistically speaking she would have many suitcases carried by her henchboys but that simply didnt fit the mood i was going for#lyrics from Yours & Mine by Lucy Dacus#marching away and you've got nothing to say?#We've got a long way to go#before we get home#cause this ain't my home anymore#post-canon
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Literally like the one good thing abt reading abt celebrities is sometimes they just have such interesting bizarre lives it's just fun to read about AND it's A+ character/writing insp tbh
#i cant say i like him anymore but im always thinking abt danny eIfmans life story bc its just. Bizarre#like. spends college savings on going to east africa. busking there. goes back home and joins the circus.#leaves circus. joins his BROTHERS circus. we have photos of him just being a clown. etc etc#etc etc#oh my god WHO'S THAT REALLY OLD DUDE WHO PLAYED LIEK GANDALF#im forgetting his name but hes also SO WEIRD. was in world war 2.told lotr director nuh uh people die like *THIS* not this#i know cause ive seen it. with my Eyes.#t
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As promised, here is me dressed as Caul. Yes, in my bathroom.
I have a few more things, but I am hiding them under the cut because 👉👈
First is me with my 7 feet cardboard Caul. Second is, believe it or not, also part of the final result (it’s the blue stuff. I put it in there with some multiple effect). Third is the backside of the bow (very proud of that) and last is just something silly I made cause tbh Caul was probably my trans awakening (I do not use tiktok btw)
#also so funny how i did this fun line art makeup to kinda resemble my style since the bow is in my style and then you can barely see it on—#—on the final result#welp#worse even cause i practiced that makeup like 4 times before i did any of this#still happy with the result even though i was struggling to get good pictures at first#oh yeah the bow is also barely visible (crying)#also watch me take this down again after a few months#ALSO made this whole post yesterday while i was still feeling good about this and scheduled it for today in case i’d feel like shit today—#—and wouldn’t want to post it anymore ✌️#caul bentham#mphfpc#mphfpc cosplay#miss peregrines home for peculiar children#library of souls#the conference of the birds#hollow city#a map of days#the desolations of devil’s acre
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During christmas i finally got myself a new wacom and it is actually a cintiq!!
AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH
I am so privileged to have one (i study animation and only have one year of school left so I needed one that 1. Worked 2. Was one that is for professionals)
But! I am still going to draw the rest of the comic with mouse as well (thats how ive done most of it) so the style doesnt change. I think it has charm in it
Might do some of the sketches with it tho since it is PAINFUL with a mouse. We shall see
#i would die and/or kill for this cintiq i am so stressed with having something so fancy#it is soooo niceeeeee q___q#shoutout to my dad and stepmom who got it they really didnt have to#i will never travel with it it lives in my home now#my old wacom wouldnt draw anymore so it was mouse time#when I say mouse i dont mean mouse. I mean the. Fucking. Flat thing you slide with ur finger. That. I use that.#jumalanpelko was really the only thing i could make because my best friend lasso tool#for months. it was painful i yearned to draw#WAIT I CAN MOVE THE TAGS BY PRESSING THEM LONGER???#I JUST HAVE TO PRESS?????#IVE BEEN DRAGGING THEM ON MY PHONE AND THEY JUST JUMPED AROUND#YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING#WAIT NO IT DOESNT FUCKING WORK I HAD TO COME AND FINISH THIS POST ON COMPUTER CAUSE THE TAGS KEPT JUMPING AROUND#WHY DID THEY MAKE IT SO HARD TO USE#jumalanpelko update
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my bug leader that i finally made a ref sheet for :P
#they/them pls#this is basically just me if i was a bug trainer and a little more feral#this character is entirely just born from my desire to wear cool flowy skirts while not being perceived as feminine#spent all this time drawing an armaldo to add to their team as well but then realized since it’s not in the galar dex there’d probably be#some kinda rule against using it in league fights#cause rose is Like That#their team in hoenn (they still have the mons but they just chill at home dont rly battle anymore)#is sceptile flygon sableye mightyena armaldo and masquerain#masquerain is the only one who reguarly still battles#and they train w the others#all the names are off of names of these mons that ive actually had and used#and butterfree is actually a gigantamax butterfree i have in shield#that bug trainer art i did over the summer is them!!#they always wear some kind of fun bug themed skirt/sash#my art#pokemon#bug type#bugs#pokemon art#pokemon swsh#butterfree#golisopod#galvantula#masquerain#pokemon oras#pokemon sword and shield#gym leader#pokemon trainer
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I apologize for my absence on this blog! I've been doodling and drawing but it's been for a new fixation of mine that I wasn't comfortable posting on here due to the game being a mature rated horror game. I've made a side blog that's 18+ for it tho I don't plan to share that here for obvious reasons!
ANYWAY, all that to say! I'm around! Do plan to post any art on here that's relevant and stuff. Just wasn't really motivated to draw for any other interests rn.
#text post#just rambling#personal update I suppose#it didnt feel good to post such a fixation on a blog thats been age friendly#made me more comfortable to make a new space for it but thats caused me to be a little more active there since its my current fixation lmao#anywho! Im still around! I just cant seen to force myself to draw welcome home anymore...nor anything else
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I think we as a fandom forget how silly Benson is. The way he talks to Randy as they drive around? His inflections and physicality when he speaks? Benson is just a sweet little boy full of repressed trauma trying to bury his darkness with loud redirection. He walked the outer world with vigilant observation and silliness and kept his darkness to himself.
#the passenger#the passenger 2023#benson the passenger#idk about y'all but i knew lots of people in hs like this#am i projecting a little? maybe#but did y'all not know someone who was the class clown with a shitty home life?#did y'all not know that theatre kid with amazing ideas who never had anything else to say?#'cause the rest couldn't be spoken#yeah he's probs a bit manic after killing 3 people#but the stark contrast between the triple homicide and sheppard#he's so silly before#hes just a sad depressed little boy stayin silly to stay alive until he just cant anymore#benson my beloved#i think about him a normal amount
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#also. now worried ill not deal well with like. being on the train and on the bus on a book event and on a concert in the next few days#cause thats famously crowded places and i am doing So bad im taking taxi from and to work to avoid being on crowded busses lol#idk what tf is going on rly#im mostly stressed out and filled with dread at home knowing i have work that day or the next day#and somewhat better after i arrive at work??#idk. but also ive lost weight and am losing hair lol and its def stress induced cause my blood test results are perfect#i have a psych appointment in a week where i could ask to get sent on a sick leave and its soon now so#im starting to feel a lot of guilt and shame around this idea#but like. cant handle this anymore#and my boss is awful my work schedule is so bad i cant have hobbies or meet friends its just bad bad bad
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OG Choi Han they could never make me hate you cause if some random rich boy was yelling at me and telling me my family deserved to die like a day after it happened and all I wanted was to know how I could get help I’d beat him up too
This plus the added fact that the Harris Village people were the first people to take Choi Han in and take care of him after years and years in the dark forest. Like he’s obviously not going to be mentally stable after all that, and he was so young when everything happened to him like I cannot blame him at all. I don’t think I can ever hate OG Choi Han like ever, he’s flawed, he has problems, but I love him dearly. He deserves the world. This kid who had to fight for his life, was taken away from his family, and in the process had to give up parts of his own humanity to survive, and like went to war two years later, they could never make me hate u OG Choi Han…
Like yeah violence is bad I guess but OG Cale had it coming(saying this as an OG Cale fan, I love him, but he was mean as hell when he was younger!)
If I’m honest, I think they were both in the wrong to an extent. Like OG Cale shouldn’t have said all that no matter the circumstances, and OG Choi Han shouldn’t have beaten him up so much. But u say mean shit and you get hit, that is how it will work when you’re talking to the guy who just saw his entire village get murdered like idkkkk man
I understand where OG Cale was coming from, but he had many issues and while he wasn’t an awful person, he was capable of doing bad things because of his own internalized pain and emotions that he never got to properly process because of his emotionally distant childhood and relationship with his father who should have been there for him more when he was younger.
Okay speaking of his childhood, Deruth isn’t the WORST father in the world but there are a lot of things he could have done better. I think a lot of Deruth’s flaws come from his fear of failure and messing up. He’s scared of doing the wrong thing, and so he sticks to doing what he knows and using what he knows best. That’s why he uses his money, that’s why gift giving is his way of showing affection, he knows that it is one thing he cannot mess up.
The problem is that money and gifts is NOT what OG Cale needed. I think what that guy needed the most was a parent who wasn’t afraid to talk to him, to ask him questions. Not to say that Deruth gave up on OG Cale, but I think in a way he gave up on OG Cale by giving up on himself. Deruth didn’t trust himself to have the capabilities to talk to OG Cale, which is why he never did. It’s because that Deruth was scared, and didn’t trust himself, that he could never face OG Cale
If Deruth was able to trust himself a little more, and pull himself together, I don’t think OG Cale would have turned out the way he did. As a kid, he probably thought the only way he could help his family without relying on anyone(no doubt this whole ‘I have to do it myself’ thing came from the fact that he couldn’t rely on his father when his mom died, and instead was acting as a pillar of support for his father when it should have been the other way around) was to sabotage himself, the only heir. If he was shown to be unfit to be heir, then everyone else would have no choice but to direct their hatred towards him instead of his family.
If Deruth had talked to his son at least ONCE when he was a kid, asking him why he was upset or why he did the things he did, I think OG Cale would have told him. Why? Because he’s a kid!! A kid will obviously want to rely on his father, if he just had one sign telling him that he didn’t have to do it alone I’m 90% sure OG Cale would have said something.
Basically, while Deruth isn’t the worst father, he’s not really a great father either. I think he does do his best, but he has issues with communication lol
OG Cale and OG Choi Han are both complex characters and had their own reasons to behave the way they did. The thing is with people is that they’re complicated and have layers, so the situation with them would have layers behind it as well with multiple co-existing truths and stuff
#guys I’m a big fan of Choi Han#and I get sad when people bring up this scene and all the blame is on him#like okay he was wrong but if YOU saw your entire family dead and some random rich boy started yelling abt how their lives were worthless#you’d be mad too no?#like his feelinsg were totally justified cause OG Cale was REALLY mean in that scene#‘their lives are worth less than the bottle in my hand’ OHHHHH OKAY OG CALE THATS ENOUGH THATS ENOUGHHHH#I love OG Cale but u have to admit he wasn’t very nice when he was younger#like the statements ‘he had his reasons’ ‘being trash was an act’ ‘he wasn’t a bad person’ ‘but he did say bad things’ can co exist#yes being trash was an act but he is ALSO capable of saying mean things and things that are wrong#LIKE TELLING THE GUY WHO JUST GOT HIS FAMILY MURDERED THAT THEIR LIVES WERE WORTHLESS#HE WAS NOT INNOCENT FOR THAT#Younger OG Cale is not a black and white character#and neither is older OG Cale but this post isn’t abt him#okay I’m gonna bring up someone who isn’t from TCF#but take Eunyung Baek from no home as an example okay#eunyung did bad things and was a bad person because of his childhood right#the reasons to being a bad person do not take away the bad things he did#but just cause he did bad things and was capable of them did not mean he could not change#I love OG Cale a LOT and I just think that his character has a lot behind it#Older OG Cale is obviously very different from his younger self#years and years of war and tragedy have matured him and like he’s not the same person he was anymore#okay back to Choi Han I love that guy I will defend him with my life#beating up people is wrong yeah but with the circumstances I’d say OG Cale had it coming#like okay it would be different if it was unprovoked but it was very much provoked#I swear I love OG Cale I just think he was very wrong for that#not to say he can’t change or isn’t capable of change he definitely is#idk I guess my point is that OG Cale was wrong but he changed as a person#and OG Choi Han was wrong for beating him up so much but it wasn’t unjustifiable#tcf#lcf
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Trunks doesn't eat as much as he should; being so use to coming from a timeline where they not only had to ration food during the Androids reign of terror but food also became more scarce during the Goku Black arc. He's become use to eating smaller portions or even expired food due to this — it been hard to break that habit now that food is readily available and he doesn't have to worry about it.
#Out Of Ki | {OOC}#Believing In Something Bigger Than Yourself | About the Muse {Future!Trunks}#THIS HAS BEEN RATTLING AROUND IN MY HEAD FOR A WHILE NOW--#I finally managed to finish Future!Trunk's HC banner so I can finally post his HCs#But yeah; those unaware F!Trunks (along with F!Saiyo and F!Gohan) currently lives in the main timeline#His future does not exist anymore; it got erased permanently#And has been adjusting to his new home slooowly...he still got some habits to break#This is one of them; he doesn't really indulge his Saiyan Appetite as much as he should#Mainly cause he still thinks he needs to 'ration' his food and such#So; he sometimes forgets to eat or holds off eating till he's starving at times...not always but sometimes
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you know what? it's 2025 and I'm not gonna let the anxiety win
#mk.op#where's that comic of the girl who just kinda like#kept on doing her work while her demon was harassing her cause that's gonna be me i swear#i'm also not gonna continue to let myself wallow in the 'it's all my fault i'm sorry' mindset either cause like#what purpose does it serve?#i've never done it in a self-victimizing way (on purpose to my knowledge at least) cause i never want to be manipulative#and i hope people know me well enough by now to know that yeah i am truly sorry for my mistakes but that doesn't make it better#just shows that maybe i'm not a total piece of shit by not caring about my faults but what good does that do if i keep faulting?#it doesn't allow for truth growth from those mistakes and god i've made so many#this is what happens when i'm trapped in my room lol#i probably could have either gone to work today or worked from home#i'm going back tomorrow and i'm not gonna let my fear of it rule me anymore
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Aight I've heard the whole "the normal amount of pain is zero" thing but like how much pain is the normal amount after relatively strenuous and/or unusual activity? Like when you're doing stuff you wouldn't necessarily normally do and you're not used to it? By that I mean being on your feet for four to five hours lol I have no idea how people work eight-hour shifts at my job
#bambi's rambling#tbh its not too bad as long as i can keep moving because then its not as painful as standing#but after a while it gets *bad*#i started doing some exercises for planar fasciitis but that only helps it not hurt for the entire rest of the day anymore after i get home#it doesnt stop it from hurting during my shift#idk maybe i'm overthinking this and its just a normal amount of pain for working on your feet?#btw when I say 'strenuous and unusual activity' I mean for me#I wasn't on my feet nearly as much before I got this job a few months ago#i'm just mildly curious if the foot/knee pain from standing is normal or if it'll go way eventually lol#i mean there's a good chance i'm just overreacting about this anyway i feel like it cant be that serious yknow?#nobody acts like its weird when i tell them so its gotta be some level of normal at least#maybe its just cause i only work three days of the week and thats not enough to get used to it or something idk#i'm only at this job for a couple more weeks so its not a big deal tbh it wont be much longer
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Just dropping this here
This was for a class at school where we had to do a redesign of a game and I chose The Werewolves of Millers Hollow (I found out there IS an English version). Some characters aren’t included cause they wouldn’t have fit the roles
#had to post this over my ipad cause i guess tumblr isn‘t letting me post on my phone—#—anymore after i already tried to post this but it said there was no connection :))))#OH NOW AFTER I WENT ALL THE WAY TO MY IPAD IT’S LETTING ME POST AGAIN UH HUH SURE#mphfpc#art#my art#caul bentham#percival murnau#jacob portman#noor pradesh#horace somnusson#enoch o connor#olive abroholos elephanta#claire densmore#nim#esmeralda avocet#mother dust#harold fraker king#velya greenshank#pt#joel-and-peter#horatio#sharon#frankie#myron bentham#alma lefay peregrine#miss peregrines home for peculiar children
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Today is my Birthday!!!
And my gift to myself is a re-draw of my Favorite Wally picture!!!
I honestly just had so so so much FUN with this!
I LOOOOOVE lineart!!
Please actually take my Lineart, it looks like a coloring page!
I'm actually so so proud of this QwQ
#uwaaaaaaaaa!!!#like sleeping Prince Charming!!!#Prince Darling....#wally darling#welcome home#whps#wally welcome home#i'm going to see the barbie movie today!!#i cant do much else on account of my broken bones lmaoo#i WOULD break a bone right before my birthday#but i am going to have a very nice day today! cause im gonna play games with my sister yippee!!!!#i had way too much fun with that icing#fun fact i must have started over on this like 5-6 times because i was struggling!! with how i wanted to do this!#sometimes u just gotta wing it!!#hes so so so cuuute HELP#i tried to get the og wally on a cake ON my birthday cake but apparently they don't Do that anymore??? like the printed image i mean#im nervous about posting this so early but then i get to reblog it later!#and i do art for me ya know!#gotta go! its breakfast time!!#jazzart
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