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gaytotaldrama · 1 year

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duncney week day 4 (a day late): first 'i love you'

an unsent letter from C to D, years after the end of the show.

duncney song of the day: 'i've got your number,' elbow

also on my ao3!

Dear Dunc

To whom it may conce

For the idiot with the green mohawk

Duncan,

I don't go to therapy, but Bridgette does, and she told me about this exercise her therapist set her where you write down everything you want to say to someone in a letter and then you don't send it. Therapy would take up way too much of my time, yet here I am on my bed, writing to you of all people.

It's been years since we last saw each other, or even spoke - since they carted you off the island and tossed you into some disgusting cell. I'm sure you're already aware, but destroying Chris's house was a really stupid idea. I understand that you were trying to prove your "villain status" or whatever, but all I could think about watching you leave was DJ and his rabbit. It made me feel sick, seeing what happened to you. Gwen and I pretended to be happy about it, but I don't think either of us were at all.

I know she called once or twice, while you were in there. I know Geoff and DJ came to visit you. I know Bridgette sent you little care baskets through the mail.

I know I never did any of those things. It all hurt so much, still. And even when it didn't, I never figured out what I would say to you.

But now, I have an idea. More or less.

However angry I was with you after you and Gwen kissed, it didn't mean I wanted to see you thrown in prison. I know I can be petty and vengeful at my lowest moments, but I always imagined you'd be eliminated in some humiliating spectacle. You'd go home. And we'd never have to see each other again, unless Owen ever decided to throw that reunion bash he was talking about.

And then when that bash happened, you were locked up again for violating your parole. And you weren't there.

I thought about filling these pages with all the reasons you were awful to me, every nitpick and tiny detail that made me hate your guts. But it's not like I was the perfect girlfriend, either. And, Duncan, we were just kids. None of us knew what we were doing, what it was we even wanted. Chris knew that and he used it against us every which way, exploiting us on international television.

I don't know if I really forgive you yet. I guess I'd have to see you in person to know. I've spent most of my time post-Total Drama working to forgive myself. Which has worked. Somewhat, at least.

Geoff says you're in Seattle. He says you're working as a tattoo artist. He says you go to AA meetings every week at the recreational center. That's good. That's really good, Duncan.

I work. Sanford, Sanford & Patel - started as a secretary, but I've clawed my way up a bit since then. Helped win some major cases. Hopefully it won't be long before they're adding a Reyes up on that sign.

Bridgette, Geoff, and I have game night every Wednesday evening. We take turns cooking dinner. Sometimes Bridgette slides me a CBD gummy to help me fall asleep at night. I jog, in the mornings. When I can, I go to the gym. Every now and then, I pick up Geoff's guitar and strum it a little. I still remember when you taught me my first bar chord. I couldn't make a sound on the B minor then, but I've gotten better, now. I've really gotten better.

I have a cat. This little precocious furball that Bridgette brought back from the shelter. She likes to claw at my nice leather desk chair and she doesn't like strangers at all; I adore her. Her name is Scruffy.

Every couple of months, I fly out to visit Gwen in Vancouver. They showed me the inky moon you put on their collarbone - I think it's beautiful. We go and get coffee together, catch up. She's got an art exhibition down in Bellingham in the fall - I plan to go, but I don't know if you'll be there. I don't know if I want you to be or not.

I've had a few boyfriends, but none of them could keep up with me. One time, Gwen and I got drunk and slept together. I'm not sure why I'm telling you this, but it was kind of good. Which is kind of funny. To me, at least.

Oh, and Geoff and Bridgette are engaged. Which I guess you already knew. It only just happened, so there are no real plans yet, you know those two. Never once made a list in their lives. But I guess if you're not at Gwen's show, we'll see each other at the wedding.

Would you talk to me? If we met again, would you even talk to me? I like to think I'd talk to you. But it's a hell of a lot easier to say it in writing than it is to do it in person.

Would you miss me?

I've missed you. I know people say you never stay with your high school sweetheart, but look at G and B, case in point. We didn't stay together, but sometimes I imagine what it would have been like if we had. Where we'd be right now.

Damn it, ok, I'm just going to say it: I love you. We never got around to telling that to each other while we were dating, but I think it's always been true, since all the way back in season one. I love you, Duncan Russo. It's totally humiliating, but I do. I still really, really do.

And I wish you were

Maybe if I

And I guess there's nothing to be done about that. Over a decade, and I'm still hung up on the boy who I kissed in the back of the Killer Bass cabin, right after puking my guts out. There's only so many people who would kiss someone with vomit breath, but you did. You didn't care. I mean, it was totally disgusting, but you kissed me back. I'll always remember the way you kissed me back.

Just...I just hope you're ok, ok? Or if not, then that you're something close to it. That show screwed every single one of us over, some more than others. The shit Chris did to us was messed up, and if I could go back and time and withdraw my audition tape, I would.

But then I guess I'd never have met you. And I don't know if that would be better or worse for me in the long run.

Thank God you'll never see this letter.

Love,

Courtney

#duncney week 2023 #duncney #td fanfiction #my writing

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bacchicly · 6 months

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A TURNING POINT

AKA Chapter 3 - Mountain Air (originally posted on Fanfic.net in 2021)

OR read on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54640615/chapters/138581950

Summary: What really happened after Luke and Penelope gave Phil is his puppy!

NOTE: Thank you to everyone who reads this and especially those who leave comments! This chapter has mixed POVs and is set just after 13x07. It is just lots of lots of connection and lovely fluff...nothing particularly smutty for those who are here for mostly that. Don't worry more will come. Hope you enjoy!

Neither Penelope nor Luke have stopped smiling since they left a very happy but tired Phil and a happy but even sleepier Lou.

After the big reveal at Phil's physical therapy appointment, and once it was established that Lou was going to ride home with Phil in his usual pre-arranged taxi, they had made a quick plan to rendez-vous at Phil's place. Luke and Pen had then spent a more than just a few hours helping Phil set up his house as a doggie paradise. While Luke installed a doggie door to the backyard and made sure there was no way the puppy could escape the small yard by mending the fence in a couple places, Penelope and Phil got to work finding the perfect places for the about a million things that they had brought in from Luke's truck.

There was enough food for Lou's first week (similar to Roxy's diet but modified for Lou's puppiness), organic dog biscuits, food and water bowls, a slightly sparkly but still butch doggie placemat, a crate for home, a travel carrier, a grooming kit, two different pooper scooper contraptions, a rainbow of differently patterned poop bags, several themed leash / collar sets, doggie booties for rain and different ones for winter, a doggie raincoat, a doggie winter coat, three doggie sweaters in progressively bigger sizes, one doggie Christmas stocking, no less than five different doggie beds, and at least one of one of every type of doggie toy available at the local pet store.

Luke and Penny had basically conducted a raid of the establishment earlier that day before picking up Lou as arranged with a local breeder. The two FBI agents had been like kids in a candy store - laughing and joking - eventually each were pushing an overflowing cart. Penelope swears she saw Luke skip a few times... and the result was that Lou may be the most recent winner of "dog with the most things" award. The eyes of the lady at the checkout had been as big as saucers as she rang up the giant bill; which was then paid for by Luke with a laugh and flourish of his charge card.

The last thing they presented to Phil was a gift certificate for puppy obedience lessons and another equivalent to three doggie spa sessions with a local groomer. Penelope had, of course, checked that both businesses would be fully accessible to Phil whether he was in a wheelchair or not. As they left, Luke promised to drop in tomorrow to see how man and puppy were doing - while Penelope programmed her cell number into Phil's phone and demanded to be texted doggie photos DAILY.

Luke places his hand on Penelope's lower back as she boosts herself into the passenger seat of his truck. Not only could he not seem to stop touching her today - a palm to her lower back, his fingers on her elbow as he guided her to the truck as she carried Lou, an arm slung over her shoulder as they stood watching Phil get to know his new buddy - he knew he couldn't remember a better day. He was so glad he had gone against his first instinct to do it all himself - even when his first Google search for a puppy came up snake eyes - and had instead asked the BAU's resident tech genius and all around expert in pet things to help him. Together they had been able to find the perfect puppy for his best friend. Plus, on top of the joy of finally feeling like he had done something good for his best friend, doing it with her made the whole experience extra incredible.

As Luke jumped into his side of the car, he looked over at the beaming blond and felt his heart beat a bit harder. He really didn't want the day to end. So as he is backing out of Phil's driveway he asks...

"Hey, I'm starving - do you want to go grab something to eat before I drop you home?"

"um...I should probably get home...I need to feed Sergio...and um turn in."

"We don't have to work tomorrow - or at least hopefully - let me say thank you for all your help today. If you want we can stop by your place first and feed Sergio... and..." he glanced at the dashboard clock "..in fact, um it's later than I thought it would be...Roxy's due home in less than an hour...how about we feed Sergio - then pick up some food and go back to my place? Pretty please? With sugar on top?" He reaches over and squeezes her knee over her skirt "You can choose what we order...I just really don't want today to end."

"I get to choose what we order? And we stop in to check on Sergio? And I get to see your sweet girl?"

"Scouts honour, Chica."

"Oh alright. You've caught me in a weak moment."

She puts both of her hands over the one he's put on her knee. His insides do a giant somersault.

He can't help but glance at her quickly as he asks:

"Yeah?

She nods and grins.

"Yeah."

He flips his hand on her knee over so he's holding her hand.

"Yeah?!"

She's laughing and nodding now. She intertwines her fingers with his.

"Yeah!"

He squeezes her hand and smiles at her quickly.

"Cool. We'll eat."

She's squeezes back and smiles and nods some more.

"Yeah!"

They both look straight ahead grinning ear to ear.

After a few minutes she turns her head cheekily...

"Alvez?

"Yeah?"

"I'm still never going to stop giving you crap."

They laugh and hold hands all the way to her place.

Sergio is on the top of his new super glam cat tree. It's clear from the fur all over it that it is a well used and loved addition to the apartment. He opens one eye when he hears "Ok we've got 15 minutes to devote to Sergio then we gotta split if we're going to be back in time to meet Roxy's sitter!" from down the hall outside the apartment "So no dillydallying Ms Garcia!" then there's a much more feminine and familiar "I bet I am faster than you! Race you to the door!" then a deep "You're on!" followed by a squealed "Wait! Alrighty Mr. Super Special Agent...1,2,3..." then a low-ish kinda squealy "Hey!" then a high breathy giggly "Go!" and then the sound of running heeled-footsteps and Penelope's screaming laugh in the hall... .

Now Sergio picks up that the deep human voice is also laughing and there are more footsteps - no heels - "Tickling is cheating! Oh no you don't! I'm going to get you Penelope Garcia!" It sounds like she's being chased down the hall but in way that Sergio might describe as kitten-ish since she sounds to be enjoying it.

Next thing Sergio knows, there is a thump against the door and her laughter gets more and more wild and breathless "Stop it! I need to find my key!" more giggling and then "Stop! Stop!" "Ok, Chica but no more cheating in foot races!" then a triumphant "Found it!" and the key can be heard in the lock.

Humans! Sergio stretches but stays on his perch so that he can be ready for whatever mayhem Penelope has brought home. Although it had better include dinner and an ear scratch or he'll have to think up some suitable revenge.

The two humans practically fall into the apartment when the door opens. His Penelope, of course, addresses him right away as is proper and crosses to reach up and scratch his head. Sergio notes that the man is the one who delivered his current throne - so he supposes he's allowed to stay for at least a few moments.

"Hey Sergio! Good day, little man? Scritch then dinner?"

Sergio meows assent, so she gives one last round of ear scritches and then heads to the kitchen. Sergio, for his part, starts to make his way down the tree - pausing to sharpen his claws a bit on one of the posts and then again to let the man stroke him a couple times.

"See how much Sergio loves his tree you got him? I still don't know how I will ever thank you enough, Luke!"

"Penelope - first of all you have given Roxy like a billion things and second of all even of you had never done anything nice for me or Roxy ever before today - which we both know is not the case - I'm pretty sure you've paid your debt today!"

"Today was wonderful. I should be thanking you for letting me a part of it! Who knew giving puppies to good homes would be my jam?"

"Survey says...ding ding ding ding..In number one place for "Penelope's Jams", that was our number one answer, folks!"

"Oh shush."

But their eyes catch and they are both smiling again at each other for a long moment.

Luke is the first to break the moment and asks:

"So...can I do anything to help? Do you need to change or grab anything before we go out again? We've got..." he looks at his watch "exactly 7 minutes until we should be back on the road."

"Um if you could refresh Sergio's water - I'll just run and make sure his box is tidy and maybe I'll just throw on something a bit cozier? We're just going to hang out eat and maybe watch some TV or um something right?"

"That was what I was thinking."

He's got that look that she'd begun to think of as his heart-eyes again...but she doesn't want to think too hard about it. Today has been too special - so she smiles and spins off to make sure Sergio has nice clean litter. She doesn't have much time - so she can't freak out or fret too much about finding the perfect outfit. She wants to be comfy and sure a bit cute...but also she doesn't want it too look too much like she's trying...honestly she has no idea exactly what is happening between the two of them - which would normally freak her out - but for some reason it's not. She quickly settles on a nice lacy copper and teal underwear and bra set...trying not to think about why that pair appeals to her in this moment - then a favourite pair of pink polka dot fleece pants and a lilac t-shirt with a wide neck that shows her bra strap. The front has a line drawing of a winking cat and coppery purple curly letters shouting out "Cats are better than people - but you're alright". She puts on a comfy but cute pair of runners - they will probably take Roxy for a walk - does a lightning quick hair accessory and glasses change - both frames and hair bow are coppery and teal and sort of steampunk inspired but not over the top - and gives herself a quick once over in the mirror - perfect. At the last minute, she bites her lip and then makes a decision. She grabs a little wooden box from the drawer of her bedside table.

She's back out in the living room in 6 minutes and 30 seconds flat.

"Ta da!"

She does a little pirouette, grabs her purse and slips the box in quickly, then chooses a coat, bends over to give a quick but loving goodbye pat to Sergio, and then, as she heads for the door, calls over her shoulder to a staring Luke Alvez with a wink:

"Whatcha waiting for, Newbie? We don't want to be late! To the truck! No dillydallying now, Mr. Alvez."

The evening was pretty much the definition of awesome perfectness. They arrived at Luke's house just moments before Roxy and her sitter, ate an amazing meal ordered from an amazing Thai place she loved - and Luke even ordered all vegetarian without her even needing to remind him that she didn't eat meat. They had all then taken a walk around the neighbourhood and when the three of them got back - man, dog, and woman - sat together and watched a new movie none of them had seen yet. The movie was definitely what Spencer would call a film not a movie - and turned out to be as engaging, thought provoking, and even funny and sweet as the previews had promised. During the movie - ahem film - she had rested her head on his shoulder and put a hand on his thigh. He had put his arm around her shoulders - his fingers drawing circles on her upper shoulder just under where the neckline crosses her arm.

As the credits roll, Luke marvels at how in this moment everything felt very - what could describe it... adult and comfortable seemed to be in the right ballpark. What was it about her that made him feel so particular about words? It had felt like they were a couple today - an old married couple who forgot their cues and got annoyed and forgave small transgressions and touched and smiled and laughed and worked together as a team. He was still very aware of her and how sexy she was - how part of him was having a total body freak out party just because she was in the room ...not to mention he was touching her. He was still very aware of how much he wanted to do things with her - but another part of him felt a different type of joy that left him at peace and whole. There had been hints of this before between them - but nothing compared to what he was feeling now. So what was next? What to do with all of this?

He didn't know but for some reason he also wasn't in a hurry to solve the riddle. He was ok with letting things be. That didn't mean what he was feeling wasn't intense or even a bit scary - but it did mean he was willing to trust this strange new in-between.

Penelope was having similar thoughts. The fact that her mind felt calm and clear in this moment - comfortable rather than anxious was novel and gently addictive. She too was aware of his body and strength and her fierce attraction to him that stemmed from the realm of physical but was coloured with many more layers. Today had been momentous - she had known for awhile that Luke was a truly remarkable - respectable - man, but today she had seen that it went even deeper. Oh, she knew neither of them were perfect, but somehow they made a very good team. They seemed to balance each other and bring out the best qualities they each had to offer. She was in awe of this man for what he brought to the world: the battles he had faced and the heart that he was still willing to open. She knew it was love she was feeling - but she wasn't quite sure yet what type of love. After all didn't she love every single member of her BAU Family and Luke was part of that.

One thing she knew was that there wasn't the panicky showy insecurity that often ran through her with potential romantic partners...the feeling that she usually took as evidence she was interested in someone. That feeling had raced through her when she first met this man - this man she was comfortably and without fear sitting beside - it was those feelings that had caused her to fight or scurry away whenever he was near.

No, that near-panic-easily-confused-as-lust-or-love-or-anger-or-danger was no longer what she felt around this man...but she wasn't sure what it meant - except she knew it was somehow sacred and precious. So what to do? What would adult Penelope do now?

Finally the last of the credits have run and the screen goes to black. They sit there for another few minutes not moving or speaking. Just being with each other and their thoughts. Penelope surprises even herself when she looks up at him - pulling back slightly so she can see his eyes - and speaks quietly and confidently but in a voice that is still true sparkly blue Penelope:

"I did a thing."

To be continued...

#criminal minds #luke alvez #penelope garcia #garvez #Mountain Air

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4spooniesupport · 5 months

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Hey guys I'm asking for good vibes, prayers, etc

I recently found my sister who I haven't seen in like 25 years (she was a foster kid) and she told me she has stomach cancer. She has 3-6 months to live. But today she is starting a new / last ditch effort treatment called carT cell therapy.

I really hope this slows or even stops her cancer. I love my sister so much and have missed her so much.

#i hate cancer #sisters #family #spoonie #chronic illness #chronically ill #chronic disease #terminally ill #tw death #anxeity

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hypocratic · 1 year

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@vitalphenomena for mack.

The most essential electronic feature in the Baltimore State Hospital that Frederick employs (aside from his office's espresso machine or the automized locks installed in every door thick enough to contain one) is the site-wide thermostat. Therapy rooms are kept at a cool sixty-two degrees fahrenheit; it is harder to lie convincingly when one is physically uncomfortable, however minimal or subliminal. Effectiveness is consistent regardless of a patient's awareness of such tactics: the cold will not dissipate whether one notices it or not. (Behavior, notably, is much the same.) In fact, registering it or its purpose only serves to amplify its presence.

Exactly an hour before private sessions within a patient's room, the silver vent in the corner of the ceiling hisses to life like a long, metal reptile coiled (in sharp, forty-five degree angles) in the rafters.

Many rooms fill with this sluggish-chill—a cold, constricted blue—throughout the day. Often, patients or staff shiver when Frederick passes them in the hallway; a simple conditioned response the uncritical misattribute to fear. An assumption, however, he makes no effort to undo.

The astute quietly conspire, voices so low the cameras present in nearly every room and hall can't detect any chatter. They talk at medical carts (staff) or through toilet plumbing (patients) or all together in the common rooms; a group can predict which branch of the facility Frederick will visit that day solely by recording room temperatures.

He's storming the halls, he hears an officer whisper as he passes through administration. Cute. An impotent hurricane with a limp, a nurse replies. He'll reassign her shift to the noncompliant quarters.

Frederick is never cold. His two piece suits keep him well insulated during the hour-long sessions. Today, he chose a wool jacket and pants. Thick, coarse fabric; stiff but remarkably pliable; a beautifully dyed brown plaid with a pocket square tucked in the hidden breast pocket stitched into the satin lining of his jacket, there in the event that his face or neck show any signs of perspiration; the sensation of warm abundance is an experience allotted to him alone of which he makes no effort to hide amongst patients—and some staff.

This will be his first formal session with Miss Mackenzie Knight. She has been temporarily assigned to the high security women's hall as she undergoes evaluation. After two days, she was approved by the attending psychologist for private interactions. He'll wait no longer than that. Of course, in this section, there's no true privacy. Cushioned walls separate each cell, but thin, horizontal bars—wide enough for voices and for arms—display each patient to the hallway and whatever figures may be loitering therein. There are no individual vents here since every room is, in a sense, conjoined. But the single vent is on. Frederick feels it at the nape of his neck, on the slim area of exposed skin between his weekly-cut hair and starched, blue collar as he enters the hallway. That chill wind hissing out like an invisible snake tongue.

Frederick carries with him nothing. Mackenzie has no backlog of hospital records for him to refer to. No written reports were found in the wreckage. Not hers, or anyone's. It would seem either the cult had no interest in writing physical or mental reports, no interest in physical or mental resources, or the records were burned along with everything else on the compound. A query, among many, Frederick mentally makes note of.

He does not peer into the other cells as he walks by. His attention is pointedly, consciously set forward. He walks with a casual, strained poise, shoulders sharp, their movement smooth then lurching with the new integration of a cane. Refusal to acknowledge a patient or their actions is the most efficient way to diffuse misbehavior and promote compliance. Like ignoring a toddler's tantrum. Some thrash against the bars, some yell. He reacts to none of it. Mackenzie's cell is last. Not unplanned: it is the closest to the hallway camera. But an annoying distance nonetheless.

A foldout chair is already set out, heralding Frederick's arrival. He steps behind it, into view, and fixes his gaze on his own hands as they wrap around the top of the backrest; he leans forward, relieving weight from his concave abdomen. Once situated, his gaze flicks up (his eyes large, weighty—pinning) then his head rises to meet hers, seeing her in-person for the first time (he had watched a few initial assessments on the camera feed in the comfort of his office during his lunch break; he found her to be remarkably rational for a girl who attempted to, and largely succeeded in, killing her entire family only a few weeks ago).

She is sitting on her bed. She looks approachable. She looks ordinary. Comfortable. Like a college student in her freshman dorm room. Frederick smiles, a flash of intrigue and excitement he does not conceal. "Hello, Miss Knight. Or, would you prefer Mackenzie? I apologize for the enforced uniform. An institution such as this shares more than a few characteristics with cults." The air conditioner kicks onto a heavier setting; louder, churning. His gaze momentarily drifts towards the noise, then back to her. Smiling, because he is able to indulge his own machinations under the guise of cordiality: "Are you comfortable?"

#ic #vitalphenomena #vitalphenomena: mack.#vitalphenomena. 001 #i feel so so sooo rusty writing wise. thanks for humoring me #you don't have to match length. you can reply with two lines if you want. truly. i'm trying to feel him out is all. stretch those limbs.#this takes place at some time around s2 jsyk

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sumitsingh12 · 1 year

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Week of April 10-16,2023

1. Structural biology 2 lectures - discussed 32 point groups- next space groups, structure factors and phase problem to be discussed in the upcoming week.

2. No meetings on CART cell therapy and glycan modeling with Naren, Ravi and Mohammed- should catch up in the upcoming week..

3. Birth of Baby boy of Anita bhabhi- 2nd child after 20 years..

4. Middle down analysis workflow (EAD) method to be tested with SCIEX team - May 15

5. Email & Abstract sent to Meiyappan for metabolic conference in south Korea (July 2023) ; invitation recieved for 4th human glycome project meeting in Croatia (June 2023).

6. Brijendra and Aryaman working on using Mechanistic models for developing ML models for glycosylation with few datasets.

7. Reading "how to read a book".

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briamichellewrites · 5 days

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2009: Water therapy. Bria had her engagement ring by the poolside. She used a pool noodle to keep her head above the surface. The band found it amusing that she was chasing Brad around the water. They noticed how good he looked in swim shorts! His body was naturally tall, thin, and muscular. He exercised regularly to care for his body. Yes, he still smoked. It grossed her out when he returned inside after a cigarette. He was trying to cut back due to the health consequences.

He was also eager to do it for her. She swam quickly, but he was faster. The dogs were peering through the door. Kate pawed at the glass as she barked. Dave turned to look at them. They wanted to come in, but Bria was afraid they would fall into the water and drown.

It was a valid concern. French bulldogs were poor swimmers due to their body shape. If the cats fell in by accident, they would have a better chance of survival. They could reach the edge by swimming with their paws. Nonetheless, they were unwilling to take the risk. After not getting their way, the dogs continued to grumble. The humans would not let them swim!

How could they have been so mean? Dave put her engagement ring in his pocket to keep it safe. He told her what he was doing. Awesome! They shared a laugh. After a while, she became tired. Brad sat her on the lift, which returned her to the side. Mike and Bradford assisted her in transferring to her wheelchair. Mike and Dave used her money to buy a water-resistant lift and wheelchair. It was ideal for showering her off after she had used the pool.

Cancer cells continued to grow over the months. They were doing everything possible to keep them from spreading. She continued to update her website with the help of Mike and Dave. They asked for prayers and good wishes for her. Dave prayed privately for her to beat cancer. He could not bring himself to bury her. Not after he buried his mother. He was furious with the disease! It just was not fair!

It had been a year since the shooting, and he was still dealing with it. He was diagnosed with a mild case of PTSD and given medication. Mike was his biggest cheerleader and supporter. He still has flashbacks and nightmares. Whenever he heard gunshots on television or in movies, he reminded himself that he was safe. He and Mike were in the grocery store parking lot when they heard what sounded like gunshots. Bang, Bang, Bang. He jumped right out of his skin. His heart rate increased as he searched for the gunman.

Mike talked to him calmly and instructed him to take deep breaths. He needed a few minutes to calm himself down. He assured him that he was safe.

“Yeah. What the hell was that?”

"A vehicle backfired."

"Oh, thank God! I am okay."

He responded with a nod. "You are safe." I am right here. Take your time."

He was ready to go inside after only a few minutes. Mike praised him and expressed his pride in him. It was just one of the many reasons why he married him! Mike was sympathetic to his situation and did not pass judgment on him. Rather, he offered him encouragement and support. When they entered, a police officer asked if he was all right. She had noticed him in the parking lot. Yes, he explained that his PTSD caused him to have a panic attack.

She understood and inquired about his military background. He was not a veteran. He was just in a bad situation. She advised him to take it easy. He said he would before thanking her. They proceeded to grab a shopping cart. Dave followed him around, reading from the list they created. A woman jokingly inquired about who was doing the shopping.

Dave replied jokingly, "I am."

Mike let out a laugh. They waited for her to say something homophobic. It happened before.

She thought they made a lovely couple. They expressed gratitude to her. He had to admit. Mike was absolutely adorable. They continued walking around the store. It all seemed so mundane and routine. They enjoyed it because it was only the two of them. They had planned another date night together. Perhaps they will go golfing or something. They went out for dinner to celebrate their first wedding anniversary.

They gave each other gifts. Donna and Muto wanted them to take a vacation somewhere. Even if it was just a quick weekend getaway. They would assist with Bria. Spending time with her helped to take their minds off of Jason. He lived in a sober living facility and went to work with a sober companion.

The companion rendered himself invisible. He participated in meetings and other required events. Jason knew that this was his last chance to prove himself. Muto made it clear that they were no longer willing to pay for rehab. The next time he relapsed, they would call the cops and have him arrested for drug possession. They were getting older and did not have the time or money to assist him anymore.

They also refused to let him into their home if he relapsed. He was welcome to come over whenever he wanted. As long as he stayed sober. It was entirely up to him. Mike was in agreement. They were finished paying for his treatment. It was not up to their parents to do that. He was an adult, and he had to deal with the consequences. Even if it meant ending up in jail. They would not allow him to be around Bria if he was drunk or using drugs. That was to ensure her safety. Her cancer had given her plenty to worry about.

"That was fucking amazing," Bria said.

Bradford asked, "How are you feeling?"

"I am tired, but it feels good to have accomplished something."

“Good. "How frequently do you do water therapy?"

"Almost every day. We stretch out my legs while I bathe, and we are starting to swim once a week to help my muscles."

He lifted and extended one of her legs before repeating with the other. Was that painful? No, it felt good. He and Rob were in a committed relationship, while she was engaged. He developed feelings for her over time. He wanted just one kiss, but he restrained himself. No, he would not do that to Rob. He loved him. When the band returned, she excused herself to rest.

Brad brought her upstairs. He gently placed her on the bed and covered her with a blanket. As he lay down beside her, she pulled it up to her chin. He gave her a kiss on the forehead. She was the most attractive woman. Each time he looked at her, he was reminded of this.

They were both terrified she would not make it. She was the only person he wanted to spend his life with. He felt her brush away his tears, which he did not know were falling. He laughed and wiped them away. For the first time, he expressed his fear of losing her. He cried without feeling ashamed or embarrassed. Not in front of her. He felt safe and relaxed. She listened to his words and wiped away his tears. He thanked her. She told him how much she loved him. He, too, loved her.

@zoeykaytesmom @feelingsofaithless @alina-dixon

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jellyjamoh · 3 months

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07.05.2024

This one's from last year's International Book Fair held at SMEX Convention. There are like thousands of books there, and the crowd was unbelievable lol. The moment I stepped inside the hall, I was swept off my feet. Totally mesmerized by the huge collection of readings.

I jumped right into healthcare-related stalls because I really wanted to purchase the neurology pre-test guide.

It was so expensive (although given that all med books are pricey) and was out of my budget. It honestly felt like I wouldn't be able to go home with a healthcare book on my cart.

To my surprise, a cozy and tiny stall has this Pulmo-related reading.

I think they also sell UST merch stuff and it was just so random that it took my attention all of a sudden.

This serves as a guide for radiologists, students, practitioners, and alike. Twas written by Jose S.L. Valencia, MD, an Assistant Professor of Radiology in the Faculty of Medicine and Surgery of the University of Santo Tomas, and a hospital consultant in radiology at the same University.

If I'd give it a star rating, it would be 5/5. It was precise, and well-written. I actually bought it just so I could have an idea about my Premed course (Respiratory Therapy lol got no choice, it's the closest/most related book that I can get).

I was trying to understand what kind of world am I getting myself into.

I'd recommend it to dorks out there. Not too complicated to digest. Realization after reading it. Pulmo isn't so boring after all. Maybe it wasn't bad that I took RT. lol just because I was into the surgery side of Nursing.

The most interesting case for me was Lung Metastases from Choriocarcinoma. Choriocarcinoma is a germ cell tumour containing syncytiotrophoblastic cells and secreting human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG) hormone. Gestational choriocarcinoma originating in gonads frequently metastasizes to the lungs, but primary choriocarcinoma originating in the lung is a very rare entity.

I do not need to explain any further why it is appealing to me lol. I mean come on. I haven't heard anything like this before. I actually like the elevated diaphragm too. :>

Thank God after searching the whole place I got to purchase a few readings and many cute colorful pens too. I hope I could still make book reviews some other time. <3

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piyushrotomac · 3 months

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Rotational Molding for the Medical Industry: Life-Saving Applications & Innovative Designs

When you think of rotational molding (rotomolding), playground equipment or storage tanks might come to mind. However, this versatile manufacturing process is making significant strides in the medical industry, revolutionizing the production of life-saving equipment and innovative devices. Let’s delve into how roto molding is transforming healthcare and explore some of its most impactful applications.

Why Rotomolding for Medical Devices?

Rotomolding offers several unique advantages that make it well-suited for medical applications:

Seamless Construction: Rotomolded parts are one-piece, eliminating weak points and seams where bacteria could accumulate. This is crucial for maintaining hygiene and sterility in medical settings.

Biocompatibility: Materials like medical-grade polyethylene and polypropylene are commonly used in rotomolding, ensuring compatibility with the human body and minimizing the risk of allergic reactions or complications.

Design Flexibility: Rotomolding allows for the creation of complex geometries with intricate details, undercuts, and internal cavities. This opens up a world of possibilities for custom medical device designs that can be tailored to specific needs.

Durability and Impact Resistance: Rotomolded parts are known for their toughness and ability to withstand impact, making them ideal for demanding medical environments.

Cost-Effectiveness: Compared to other manufacturing processes like injection molding, rotomolding often offers lower tooling costs, especially for low- to medium-volume production runs.

Life-Saving Applications

Rotomolding plays a vital role in the production of a wide range of medical devices and equipment, including:

MRI Machine Housings: Rotomolded housings provide a lightweight, durable, and radiolucent enclosure for MRI scanners.

Incubators and Infant Warmers: Rotomolding enables the creation of seamless, easily cleaned incubators that provide a safe and controlled environment for newborns.

Rehabilitation Equipment: Rotomolded parts are used in therapy balls, balance boards, and other rehabilitation aids due to their durability and impact resistance.

Prosthetic Limbs: Custom-designed prosthetic limbs can be produced using rotomolding, offering a comfortable and lightweight solution for patients.

Medical Carts and Storage Containers: Rotomolded carts and containers are widely used in hospitals for transporting and storing medical supplies, equipment, and specimens.

Diagnostic Equipment: Rotomolding is used to create housings and components for various diagnostic devices, such as ultrasound machines and X-ray equipment.

Biomedical Research Equipment: Rotomolded tanks and containers are used in laboratories for a variety of research applications, including cell culture and drug development.

Innovative Designs

Rotomolding’s design flexibility allows for the creation of innovative medical devices that were previously impossible or impractical to manufacture. Some examples include:

Custom-Fit Orthopedic Braces and Supports: Rotomolding enables the production of personalized braces that conform to the unique contours of a patient’s body, providing optimal support and comfort.

Portable Medical Shelters: Lightweight, rotomolded shelters can be rapidly deployed in disaster areas or remote locations to provide medical care.

3D-Printed Rotomolded Parts: The combination of 3D printing and rotomolding allows for the creation of highly complex and customized medical devices with unprecedented precision.

The Future of Rotational Molding in Medicine

As the medical industry continues to evolve, so too will the applications of rotational molding. With advancements in materials, technology, and design, we can expect to see even more innovative and life-saving devices emerging from this versatile manufacturing process.

From improving patient care to enhancing medical research, roto molding is poised to play an increasingly important role in shaping the future of healthcare. As a leader in rotational molding solutions, Piyush Rotomac is committed to working with medical device manufacturers to bring their innovative ideas to life and improve the lives of patients worldwide.

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neosciencehub · 3 months

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Innovations & Challenges in CAR T-Cell Therapy

Innovations & Challenges in CAR T-Cell Therapy @neosciencehub @SmartLabTech2 #neosciencehub #smartlabtech #IndiaBiopharmaLeadersConclave #hyderabad #biopharma #biosimilars #innovations #challenges #CARTcellTherapy #biologics #NSH

The 4th Edition of the India Biopharma Leaders Conclave, held at Le Meridien, Hyderabad, illuminated the burgeoning field of CAR T-cell therapy during a compelling panel discussion titled “Recent Advances & Future Prospective of CART T Cell Therapy.” Exploring the theme “New Horizons in Biopharma, Biosimilars, & Biologics”, the session of panel discussion guided the discourse through the latest…

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#featured #India Biopharma Leaders Conclave #sciencenews

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coherentmarketinsights · 3 months

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Innovations in Infectious Disease Therapeutics Field

Innovations in Infectious Disease Therapeutics Field New Developments in Antiviral Drug Discovery Viruses are constantly evolving and finding new ways to evade our immune systems and existing treatments. This makes developing effective antiviral drugs an ongoing challenge. Researchers are making progress, however, with several new and promising antiviral agents in development. One area of focus is on developing pan-antiviral drugs that can target different types of viruses. These broad-spectrum antivirals hold potential as treatments for viruses with no approved therapies as well as emerging viruses. Several candidates are being evaluated that block viral fusion or entry into host cells. These include EIDD-2801, which is in clinical trials for influenza. EIDD-2801 works by inhibiting RNA replication of influenza and many other respiratory viruses. Other pan-antiviral approaches involve activating innate immune defenses. RVX-208 is a small molecule that enhances the cellular antiviral response mediated by RIG-I-like receptors (RLRs). In animal studies, RVX-208 showed protection against a variety of viruses including influenza, Ebola and Marburg. It could serve as a contingency treatment for outbreaks of unknown viruses. Toll-like receptor agonists also activate innate immunity and may have broad antiviral potential. New Infectious Disease Therapeutics Target Hepatitis C and HIV Hepatitis C virus (HCV) infection can now be cured in over 95% of cases with all-oral direct-acting antiviral regimens. Second-generation pangenotypic regimens that work against all major HCV genotypes are revolutionizing treatment. However, challenges remain including how to increase access to care and develop affordable therapies for developing countries where HCV remains largely untreated. Researchers are also working on preventative HCV vaccines, which could help curb future infections. The HIV/AIDS pandemic has been transformed by combination antiretroviral therapy (cART). However, a cure remains elusive and lifelong treatment is still required. Investigational strategies to achieve a functional cure include "kick and kill" approaches using latency-reversing agents plus immunotherapy. Gene therapy techniques are also being explored as a potential cure by delivering genetic modifications like the 'London patient' case or using CRISPR/Cas9 to disrupt HIV DNA. Additional research aims to develop long-acting injectable or implantable forms of cART to improve adherence. New Antimicrobials Target Drug-Resistant Infectious Disease Therapeutics The resistance crisis presents grave threats as common infections again become difficult or impossible to treat. This is driving intensive efforts to discover new classes of antibiotics. Unfortunately, only a few new drugs have reached the market in recent years. Many programs focus on screening natural sources for novel chemical scaffolds with antimicrobial activity. Actinomycetes (bacteria found in soil) have historically produced the majority of antibiotics in clinical use and continue to offer new possibilities. Another strategy is re-engineering existing antibiotic scaffolds to potentially regain or enhance activity against resistant pathogens. In addition to bacteria, drug-resistant fungal infections pose an increasing threat in immunosuppressed patients. Only three major classes of antifungals are available clinically with limited options for difficult-to-treat invasive candidiasis and aspergillosis. New triazole, echinocandin, and alkylamino fungicidal compounds are under development to expand the arsenal. Alternative approaches include phage therapy - using viruses that infect bacteria (bacteriophages) as living antimicrobial drugs. Phages have shown promise treating multi-drug resistant infections when antibiotics fail. However, more research is needed to optimize this approach for clinical use. Nanoparticle formulations can also potentially enhance the potency and delivery of existing and experimental antibiotics.

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xtruss · 6 months

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HIV Cure Nearer With Way To 'Shock And Kill' Latent Virus

— Published March 27, 2024 | Newsweek

A Stock iIlustration Shows the Human Immunodeficiency Virus. Researchers May Have Found a Way to Remove Latent HIV From Cells, According to a New Study. IStock/Getty Images Plus

We might be a step closer to curing HIV, as researchers have developed a way to knock out a version of the virus lurking in the body.

Using something called an HIV-like particle (HLP)—which are dead HIV particles containing HIV proteins that trigger an immune response in a patient—may help treat the disease, scientists from the University of Western Ontario's Schulich School of Medicine and Dentistry and the U.K.'s University of Bristol reveal in a paper in the journal Emerging Microbes & Infections.

HLP was found to be 100 times more effective at treating the virus in people living with chronic HIV while on combined antiretroviral therapy (cART) than other candidate HIV cure therapeutics.

HIV, or human immunodeficiency virus, attacks the immune system, specifically targeting CD4 cells, which are crucial for helping the body fight infections and diseases. Without treatment, HIV can progress to the more advanced stage called AIDS, which can lead to death in only a few years.

More than 1.2 million people across the U.S. have HIV, with over 30,000 new cases diagnosed every year. There is no cure for HIV, but several treatments are available that can allow patients to live a long life.

HIV is treated primarily with cART, which is a combination of medications designed to suppress the replication of HIV in the body. This therapy works by targeting different stages of the HIV life cycle, preventing the virus from multiplying and reducing its levels in the bloodstream.

The goal of cART is to reduce the viral load (the amount of HIV in the blood) to undetectable levels, allowing the immune system to recover and preventing the progression of HIV to AIDS. However, cART doesn't completely eliminate the virus from the body, and the virus creates a "latent reservoir" where it hides within the cells of the body, lying dormant.

According to the new paper, HLP can help to purge cells of this latent HIV, making it a major step forward in treating and curing the infection.

"The development of this HIV cure was ten years in the making but with strong support from our collaborators in the US, Canada and Uganda, we have observed a striking ability of HLP to drive out the last remnants of HIV-1, which we hope will provide an affordable cure for all," said Eric Arts, the Canada research chair in HIV pathogenesis and viral control at the Schulich school, in a statement.

"To live HIV-free is a goal for the 39 million infected. It is also the priority of the UN and WHO to end the HIV pandemic by 2030," he added.

HLP, a deactivated version of HIV, contains various proteins that make it recognizable to the body as the virus, triggering an immune response. But it doesn't contain any of the structures that make the virus harmful and immunocompromising. HLP can therefore trigger the immune system to go hunting after HIV viruses remaining in the body, including the latent viruses hidden inside the immune cells. This allows the body to "shock and kill" the hidden viruses, the researchers said in the paper.

The researchers used blood samples from 32 patients with chronic HIV from the U.S., Uganda and Canada who had been on stable cART for a median of approximately 13 years. They found that HLP was able to specifically target just the immune cells containing a latent HIV reservoir, removing the virus from the cells.

"Over time, the virus grows more diverse within a single individual that is not on treatment which makes it more difficult to target," co-author Ryan Ho, a master's student at the Schulich school, said in the statement. "This formulation we've crafted covers the theoretical diversity so it can reach the HIV-1 in all those people living with HIV."

This is an extremely exciting discovery for HIV researchers, as it could be combined with cART and one day lead to the total elimination of HIV from the bodies of patients.

Minh Ha Ngo, the paper's lead author and a postdoctoral scholar at the Schulich school, said in the statement: "One concern expressed among people living with HIV for years is that continued use of cART could lead to the virus becoming unreachable and unable to be eliminated.

"The results of this study, by contrast, demonstrate that combining HLP with cART is still able to trigger the latent reservoir, even in chronic cases. If these dormant latent reservoirs can be awakened, then they can be eliminated from the body," Ngo said.

Additionally, HLP appeared to work on all variants of HIV from around the planet, indicating that it could be successful at treating even mutated versions of the virus.

"Owing to its high mutation rate, HIV exhibits remarkable genetic diversity, resulting in different viral subtypes, some of which predominate in particular regions of the globe," said Jamie Mann, a senior lecturer in vaccinology and immunotherapy at the University of Bristol's Veterinary School, in the statement.

"We were excited to see preliminary evidence that our HLP cure therapy reverses latency irrespective of the subtype of the individual's infection. Whilst this needs to be explored further, it hints at the global applicability of our approach," Mann said.

The researchers hope to test this HLP treatment across a larger cohort of people around the world to determine if it is an effective treatment strategy for those with both chronic and acute HIV.

— Jess Thomson is a Newsweek Science Reporter based in London UK 🇬🇧

#HIV #Health & Medicine 💊#Virus 🦠#Treatment #Infectious Diseases 🦠#HIV/AIDs #Disease 🦠#AIDS #HIV Cure #Shock & Kill | Latent Virus 🦠#Newsweek

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shawntillitt · 9 months

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PCRF Funding Supports Research to Reduce Childhood Cancer

The Pediatric Cancer Research Foundation (PCRF) is dedicated to eradicating childhood cancer by accelerating scientific breakthroughs that lead to cures. Since its inception in 1982, PCRF has continuously worked toward its mission of ensuring that no child succumbs to cancer.

PCRF focuses on funding revolutionary research aimed at developing less toxic cancer treatment regimens. The foundation strives to empower researchers across the nation whose innovative ideas hold the potential to revolutionize pediatric cancer care. Having invested over $58 million in pediatric cancer research, PCRF has significantly contributed to transformative advances in cancer treatment.

By providing crucial early-stage funding, PCRF enables researchers to prove their concepts, laying a foundation for larger grants and federal funding. This approach has propelled the cultivation of a new generation of researchers, reshaping the landscape of pediatric cancer treatment and diagnosis.

The foundation efficiently channels donated funds into impactful research endeavors within a year of receipt. Following a stringent evaluation by a panel of independent scientists and subject-matter experts, it allocates donations to pioneering projects with the potential to bring about significant breakthroughs. Grant awards are finalized and distributed to researchers during the initial quarter of the subsequent year.

Although the research grant process is straightforward, the research journey itself is complex. From the point of discovery to realizing FDA-approved treatments, scientific achievements can take from several months to decades to benefit patients. Within a rigorous research process, increased funding enables the simultaneous testing of numerous innovative concepts, with the primary aim of expediting the transition of discoveries from the laboratory to enhanced patient care. Every donation directly works toward cures and promising futures for children.

Donations made to PCRF have been pivotal in the organization’s ability to fund remarkable progress. This funding has been directly used to support research on pioneering treatments for various types of childhood cancers.

One notable milestone is the pivotal role PCRF-funded research played in curing advanced mature B cell non-Hodgkin lymphoma in children and adolescents. Through innovative therapies, toxic exposure and treatment periods have been reduced. More efficient treatment strategies enable young patients to lead healthier lives and spend less time in hospitals while undergoing therapy.

PCRF's allocation of funding for research on CART cell infusion facilitated groundbreaking treatment approaches. The development of T cells paired with genetic engineering led to the first-in-human protocol targeting leukemia. This revolutionary work paved the way for state of the art therapies harnessing the body’s immune system, driving advances in immuno-oncology.

Funding from PCRF has demonstrated the potential of immunotherapy in treating osteosarcoma, a form of bone cancer that initially develops in the cells that produce bones. This research offers hope for patients who previously had limited treatment options.

PCRF funding has also enabled diagnostic tests for JMML, an uncommon type of childhood leukemia that involves the movement of cancerous cells into tissues like the skin, lungs, and intestines. New diagnostic tests predict the likelihood of positive responses to intensive treatments and optimize patient outcomes in a disease with historically low survival rates.

PCRF's relentless pursuit of innovative breakthroughs has also contributed significantly to advances in acute myeloid leukemia (AML) treatments. Research supported by PCRF has led to the development of newer and more effective drugs, offering promising avenues to combat AML by targeting the overproduction of specific proteins.

#Shawn Tillitt

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