#carrot processing lines

[allroundvp]

There are four different carrot processing lines you can choose from at Allround. Each of these lines can be customized to meet your requirements and to perfectly suit your production facility. With us, you are ensured of high-end equipment that meets your requirements in terms of processing speed, capacity, and more.

[darlingofdots]

the vast majority of fanworks are bad, and that's fine, actually. they are bad for the same reason that the average number of legs for a human person to have is less than two: statistics. like with all endeavours and especially creative ones, most people who write fanfiction or draw art of their favourite characters are bad at it. if you line up all the crochet projects in the world, most of them will be, well, bad. some are bad because they're the first thing a person ever made, or the second or third or tenth, and this kind of thing takes practice. others are bad because the person who made them is just not very good at it. maybe they just learned how to make granny squares and they're perfectly happy to never expand or improve on that. most people who dance or bake or garden or braid hair are not amazing at it! and you'd never go to your kid's dance recital or eat your friend's homemade carrot cake and expect the same experience as you'd have at a professional ballet performance or award-winning bakery. And that's if we assume there is an objective measure of Good Art, which there isn't! Some art is just "bad" because you don't like it!

I think though that specifically with fanfiction, we sometimes forget that when we read a book or watch a movie, dozens of people have looked at it and given feedback and made changes and done quality control before the final product reaches our shelves or screens, and that's not counting the original writer's learning process and past experience. A published book is not anyone's first crochet project, even if it is their debut novel. But with fanfiction, the barrier to entry is so low (on purpose! this is a good thing!) that we do get to see a lot of wonky granny squares, and on sites like AO3 they're sitting on the same shelf as the hand-made silk lace wedding dress and you can't always tell just by looking at it which is which. The consequence of this is that we encounter fic that we think is unpolished, has bad punctuation, is out of character, and we are tempted to think "well, this is awful! how dare this person put this wonky granny square on the same shelf as the lace wedding dress!" But that's not how fandom is supposed to work! That wonky granny square is somebody who is really excited about this TV show they just watched and they are reaching out into the void to share their excitement with you. To scoff at them for not making a lace wedding dress is really, really rude. Even if they did make a lace wedding dress, maybe it's just really not your style, or you think they should have used a different pattern, and it's still their wedding dress. You don't have to wear the dress and you don't have to read the fic.

We all know that there is some fanfic out there that is incredible. I think it's important to talk about that! But the vast majority of people who post their writing online are just sharing their little hobby projects that they make for fun and I also think it's important to remember that.

[headspace-hotel]

you know how people say "cats domesticated themselves?" I find this statement irksome because as i've been studying plants and particularly weeds, a theory has slowly been forming in my head about domestication that makes a lot more sense than other theories.

Basically, I think everything domesticated itself. Or rather, domestication involves adaptation and active participation on both sides.

Evidence for this is found in studying weed and crop plants—truth be told, most weeds are or were also crops.

Amaranthus, the genus that gives us the most costly USA agricultural weeds? All edible and healthy, and several members of the genus are domesticated. They were staple crops for Mesoamerican empires.

Kudzu, the vine so aggressive in the USA it turns trees into looming kudzu monoliths? It's been bred and cultivated by humans since the Neolithic in its native range, in China it was one of the main sources of fiber for cloth for MILLENNIA to the point that the Zhou dynasty had a whole government office of kudzu affairs. Kudzu roots are edible and they can be as tall as a human and weighing over 200 pounds, you can make them into flour, make noodles out of the flour, you can process them down into a starch and use it just like potato or tapioca starch and make all sorts of sauces and confections and stuff out of it. In Japan it was used for clothes too, if you see pictures of clothes worn by a samurai that's probably kudzu! It has loads of unresearched phytochemicals that probably have medicinal use, it's good for making paper, a researcher even made a biodegradable alternative to plastic out of it

Yellow Nutsedge is a food crop, Purslane is a food crop, at least some species of morning-glories are food crops, crabgrass is a food crop, Nettles are food AND fiber, Milkweed is food and fiber too, Broadleaf Plantain is food and medicinal, Dandelion is food and medicinal AND great companion plant (they used to sell them in seed catalogues around the 1890's or so!) and have y'all ever seen queen-anne's-lace along the side of the road? THATS CARROTS. That's the wild ancestor of carrots! (ofc don't eat anything you aren't 1000% sure you can identify)

Simply put. A weed is a plant that has co-evolved with humans. And most of them are Like That because they co-evolved with us. And honestly I reckon that many plants were domesticated in the first place because they liked to grow in disturbed environments near human settlements and agricultural fields.

Now thinking about this in terms of animals...when our domestic species were first domesticated, there weren't fences, there wasn't "inside" or any controlled environment to bring animals into, and if you tried to overpower or coerce any of those species, they would 100% just kill you. It makes a lot more sense if the humans were just following herds around, and it gradually developed into protecting those herds from predators and tending to them more intentionally until we were kind of just part of the herds ourselves.

a lot of people are familiar with Biblical stories and metaphors about shepherds...it's clear those guys were basically living with sheep 24/7. They were assimilated to the sheep lifestyle.

this theory kinda suggests that we've lost the ability to domesticate new animal species to some extent because domestication has never really involved removing an animal from its natural environment. Feeding wild animals and trying to socialize them to humans isn't in line with the mutualistic nature of domestication because it's trying to change the animal to our whims, and usually decreases the fitness of the animal rather than increases it. And domestication probably takes a long long time to reach the level where an animal can be a "pet" instead of a more distant form of domestication where the association is not as close.

EXCEPT. Animals that adapt to our environment are prime candidates for domestication. This actually checks out because rats and mice are some of the most recently domesticated animals, iirc. Basically, pest animals are the most likely to be domesticated because they've already started evolving into a relationship with us. Just like weeds.

An interesting side note is how both animals and plants can de-domesticate and become "weeds/pests" again. Like "weedy rice" is becoming a problem in some crops where rice has evolved into a weed. And with animals, there's pigeons who were domesticated by us and now their habitat is cities because they co-evolved with us.

[vaaaaaiolet]

You take it upon yourself to spice up your husband's work lunches at Rebecca's encouragement, and Leon nearly dies in the process. Is Hello Kitty really a killer? Leon, for one, is convinced she's up to no good.

f / m, you're married to older leon!, crack treated seriously, fluff, slice of life, the dso is just one big happy family because i said so, bento boxes and happy ending but maybe not for chris (i still love my peanut buster king)

word count: 1.4k // read on ao3

a/n: inspired by rrcherrypie's hello kitty bento box video that i watched religiously as a kid. this entire fic is a shitpost tbh LMAO this is my government mandated apology for a story where no one goes anywhere <3 go check it out if you haven't yet!

Ever since his cop days, Leon’s learned that you can’t trust anyone whose hands aren’t in plain sight and well, Hello Kitty’s emblazoned face staring up at him from the kitchen counter doesn’t exactly have hands. Or arms.

Leon scrunches his nose at her and opts to wrap his own arms around your waist instead.

“Doll.”

“Hm?” 

Leon lines the side of your neck with kisses as carrot coins and cucumber slices fall serenely away at your knife. 

“Whatcha doin’?” he prods.

You neatly sweep the vegetables into the Hello Kitty bento box and give your attention-hungry husband a kiss to tide him over, but it’s not quite enough to satiate. Octopus sausages stare back at him with pointy sesame seed eyes, and Leon grows more unsettled by the minute.

He’s done playing nice; gives your hip a pinch. “Come on, you’re killing me here. What’s with all the arts and crafts?”

“Now, before you say anything,” your voice is soft and placating and giving him all the more reason to worry, "‘Becca came by to visit me the other day and said she really liked what I made you for lunch last week.”

“So this is for her?” Leon breathes a sigh of relief. He was starting to thin-

“No, this is for you, silly!”

And you laugh like it’s funny.

“I thought I should start putting in some more effort into your food. You’re away for work so often, and I don’t get to make you nice things as much as I want to.”

Leon chokes a little and looks back down at Hello Kitty’s gleaming metal face. “This is…what I’m taking to work?”

Your face falls. “What, you don’t like it?”

“No, doll, it looks delicious but…you really didn’t have to go all out. Your sandwiches are just fine. I don’t wanna give you the trouble, y’know?” 

“No trouble at all, baby,” you practically sing the words as you twirl to add your knife to a precarious tower of dishes in the sink, “you just say the word, and I can make you bento boxes every week.”

Every week?

You cup a soapy palm to Leon’s cheek as his gaze descends into a thousand-yard stare to rival Hello Kitty’s. “I think your friends might even be excited about your lunch now!”

Oh, absolutely. Chris was going to have a field day.

Chris completely loses his shit as predicted.

“Oh, Leon, it’s adorable,” Rebecca chimes in hopefully as Chris coughs into his fist, “you should have seen how excited she was when I gave her the box!”

The frustrated ceramic click of Leon’s teeth is somehow audible over Chris’ uncivilized howling. “So this was your idea?”

She gives him a sheepish chuckle.

“Rebecca, I thought we were friends,” he pleads as he picks up his metal fork. The team hovers over Leon’s shoulders like vultures to eye what his wife’s made him for lunch. 

To your credit, it’s a mealtime Michelangelo. There are Sanrio-themed rice balls of both the brown and white variety, vegetables neatly cut and festooned with animal picks, a beautifully folded omelet, and the ever omniscient octopus sausages. Hello Kitty’s metal face guards the entire hoard like a gargoyle. It’s enough to make Leon lose his lunch, but he’d have to have some first to cough it up.

He gives the octopus a tentative poke.

“Seriously, Leon, just man up and eat the damn thing.” Jill takes no nonsense as usual, plucking a carrot from the bed of lettuce and tossing it into her mouth. “Chris is just salty he’s having his fifth protein shake lunch of the week.”

“Am not!”

“Are too!”

It’s never quiet with those two around, but Rebecca gives him an encouraging smile as he gives the octopus a chew. It’s not bad, really. It’s just something about eating something with ey-

Rapid alarm beeps in the main compound snap the team’s attention away from the bento box affair and towards the map in the middle. Rebecca shoots off in her rolling chair to pull up what’s alerting the alarm system, and Hunnigan’s business voice projects into Leon’s earpiece.

“I hope you’ve had a satisfying lunch.” 

He wonders if Hunnigan ever eats as he shoves his bento box into the breast pocket of his leather jacket. 

She, however, is unconcerned. “You’re going to need the energy for the incident we’ve just gotten wind of downtown.”

The situation was supposed to be minor. There were rumors of King Tut’s Curse swirling amongst the museum staff after a rare shipment of Egyptian artifacts, but nobody had taken anything seriously until a janitor walked into the storage room and came back out more dead than alive. Things escalated after the infected janitor wandered into the World War II exhibit and bit the cleaning team there. The staff was horrified, the media was unhelpfully broadcasting the entire thing on live TV, and the DSO had blessedly quieted the whole thing down on that end before directing the case to Leon’s team as a classic T-virus takedown operation.

Easy as pie. Except the undead cleaning crew had gotten ahold of loaded World War II guns, you know, for historical accuracy. 

It’s a cinch for the most part to evacuate the visitors from the museum. Leon ushers terrified middle schoolers out of the exhibits as fast as he can while the rest of his team rounds up the infected, and it’s a routine sweep. He just feels bad for the kiddos.

“But what about the gift sho- AHH!! ” Leon whirls around to see an Infected point a knife bayonet into a terrified sixth-grader’s face. The zombie’s finger pulls back the trigger almost cinematically, and Leon’s not stupid. He’s going to be too late.

The gun fires.

It fires a round directly into his left shoulder as he shoves the kid to safety.

Leon collapses on the ground after shooting the zombie’s head to bits, but his shoulder aches something fierce. Oh God, not again, this time he hasn’t even got Ada to patch him up. He gingerly presses two fingers to the wound and pulls them away to inspect the warm spill of blood, but surprisingly, his fingers come away clean. 

Jill comes running up as he stumbles to his feet. The last of the Infected have been wiped out, she explains frantically, pulling out a roll of gauze, and everything’s secure, but suddenly she stops to peer at his spotless bullet wound.

So it’s not just him. There was definitely a shot, and his shoulder definitely hurts like a bitch. 

But where was the bullet?

You’re chewing your nails down to the quick when Leon walks into the living room later that evening. The quiet shuffle of his shoes falling onto the stand prompts you to smother in him a warm, bakery-scented hug and take him by surprise, but he squeezes you back as much as his shoulder allows.

You sniffle into his leather-clad chest. “I’m so sorry, baby, I just- I saw the news before they stopped the broadcast and I can’t believe they sent you to deal with the riot!”

So that’s what Hunnigan fed the press this time. Practical as always.

“I can’t believe I made you go to work with that stupid lunch,” you carry on, gasping as you spot the bandage peeking through his jacket, “you didn’t like it and you could have died, I’m never-”

“I’m alright, no biggie.” Leon kisses the top of your head, taking you by the arms and sitting you down next to him on the couch. You furiously wipe a tear off your face.

“It’s not alright, I’m never making you anything you don’t like ever again. That bento box is bad juju. I’m telling Rebecca never to buy anything from that shop from now on.”

Okay, so you finally admit the box is creepy. Leon bites back a laugh. 

“Woah, doll, not so fast. You think it’s the box’s fault I got hurt?”

“What else would it be? Today’s the first time you take it to work, and then you get shot on a regular patrol.” You frown as he pulls the Hello Kitty bento out from inside his jacket. “You brought that thing home?”

He chuckles. “Take a look at it. I’ve got you to thank for saving my life.”

You squint at the tin and realize with a startle that a bullet round is lodged smack dab in the middle of Hello Kitty’s yellow nose. Like a goddamn bullseye.

The lunchbox had taken the brunt of the hit, leaving Leon unscathed.

“Incredible.” you breathe out. 

And he’s inclined to agree.

“So, doll,” Leon grins, “got any leftovers for tomorrow? Chris is a really big fan of the octopus things.”

psst, find more of my work here!

comments and reblogs are very much appreciated <3 take care and i love you!

[gotholdladywithadhd]

Unpopular opinion, probably.

So I've read many metas, and thought a lot about it and have come to my own personal conclusion about the final 15.

I'm taking it at face value.

Because it was the most human Crowley and Aziraphale have probably ever been and I think that is at least part of the point. Love makes people stupid and they are navigating a very human thing in very unhuman circumstances, and it's hard enough to do as a human in human circumstances!

I think Aziraphale believed the Metatron about Crowley bc he was expecting the worst when TM mentioned Crowley but instead got the one thing he wanted most (him and Crowley together and safe, not Crowley being an angel. ) Crowley was absolutely the carrot here. (and no I do not think Crowley would have been safe or happy, but that's besides the point.) I can't tell you how many times I've believed patently ridiculous things because I wanted to believe them so badly even though if I was looking at the same situation objectively from an outside POV I would see how ridiculous it was, so I totally get it. This isn't to say I think Azi had a real choice to go to Heaven or not and I think he did understand that as well, but I get the temptation the Metatron threw out to him, I really do.

As for Aziraphale literally saying all the wrong things to try and get Crowley to come with him? Um yeah been there done that too, the nerves take over, the brain shuts off, the mouth goes into autopilot pulling stuff out its ass, and "WITAF did I just say?" happens.

Crowley not taking any of it well and only hearing what he expected to hear (I'm not good enough for you bc I'm a demon and you only really want me if I can be an angel) *and* also being more able to see through heavens bullshit bc he has lived it, and can see it from the outside, *and* all whilst being the most honest and vulnerable he has ever been with Aziraphale in 6,000 plus years (or in fact possibly to anyone, ever. the closest before this admitting he was lonely to Azi during the Job minisode,) *then* hearing what he took to be the same Heaven will save us line from Azi was enough to trigger a massive bout of RSD and a broken heart. Everything was supposed to "vavoom and sorted! " and instead the stupid awning broke and everything went wrong. I think I've said it before that at this point Crowley can't hear anything over the sound of his heart breaking into a million pieces.

That's a whole lot to pack into the brief moments before Azi has to leave with the Metatron (who let's be honest was rushing him before he could change his mind) esp when neither of them are used to discussing their relationship openly. They didn't have time to think, to ask questions, to share information, (like hey guess what really happened to Gabriel?) Crowley tried to communicate as much as he could about his feelings with the kiss but Azi didn't have the time to properly process all that and said the wrong thing again and Crowley was rejected (he thought) again and it all just went so very wrong. You can't fix a 6,000 year relationship in 15 minutes, you just can't no matter what the story books say.

It's about two people wanting the same thing but not being able to get it (yet) because of circumstances and personalities. All of S2 was about them seeming to be closer than ever (and in many ways they were) but really they were opposed at almost every turn. (in RL not the minisodes, those actually showed them working together and coming out okay mostly, if you don't count wee Morag or Crowley getting dragged to hell) The way they both handled the Gabriel situation, how they both worked to solve the mystery, even how they tried to make Nina and Maggie fall in love were all either done alone, or in opposite ways. I've said it before and I'll say it again, as it was pointed out right in ep1, their exactlies aren't the same and until they are, they aren't going to be able to be together. The one time they did work together in the season, they produced a 25 lazuri miracle. That is the point of the final 15, and the whole season 2 in my opinion.

They'll get there in the end though!

[cameronspecial]

Dad!drew and readers kid wants a sibling, so drew and reader have THE conversation

Can We Really Do It?

Pairing: Dad!Drew Starkey x Reader

Warnings: Suggestion of Sex at The End

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 0.6K

Masterlist

Anything Megan wants, she gets. There are boundaries, of course; however, if it is within his power and she is being good, Drew makes it his mission to buy it for her. Today, the little girl comes home from daycare wanting something that her parents can’t just pick up on a run to the store. “Mommy, I want a baby brother,” Megan announces nonchalantly, focusing her attention on eating her snack. The hand drying off a glass freezes, “Why do you ask, Baby?” Megan shrugs and stares at the carrot in her hand. “Stephanie has one and she gets to play with him at home all the time, so I want one too. Can we go to the store tomorrow to get one? I have been a good girl,” she suggests. Y/N sighs and sets the glass on the drying rack, “Unfortunately, Baby, Mommy and Daddy can’t just go to the store and get one. I will have to talk about it with Daddy and if we decide to get one, then it could be a while until we get one.” When her daughter doesn’t reply right away, she knows that Megan has already moved on from the conversation. “Okay, can we play outside after snack?” Megan innocently asks, kicking her legs while she eats the vegetable. 

———

As Y/N returns to her bedroom from the adjoining bathroom, Drew starts taking off the decorative pillows his wife insists on keeping. She joins him at the head of the bed and fluffs their pillows. “So…” she begins, eyes remaining on her task. “Meg asked me about getting a baby brother.” He pauses his actions, getting into bed beside her. “And do we know why she is asking for one?” he pries. She snuggles into his side, “Because Stephanie has one and Meg wants someone to play with.” Drew nods along with her explanation. “I see. I mean… We always talked about wanting more kids. The question was always when,” he reminds her. She leans her head back to rest against the headboard, “We did, but is two years too early? I mean, we always said we would wait until she starts school to start trying.” “That is true. You and your sister have a two-year age gap and you guys turned out fine,” he says. 

“We aren’t my parents though, so it is more so what we are ready for. I love Megan. But sometimes she can be a lot and if we have another kid, we would need to deal with both.”

“Yeah, we would. I’ll be honest. I think that we can do it. We are great parents and we have so much love to give. Maybe another kid would be good for us. However, having a baby affects you physically, so if you aren’t ready to go through that again, then I am perfectly happy to wait.”

Her heart squeezes at his consideration of her needs. Being pregnant was hard, yet the reward of getting to be a parent made it worth it so the pregnancy wasn’t her issue. “I’m fine with the pregnancy. It’s just… Can we really do it?” she thinks out loud, tracing the skin on his forearm. His lips find her temple, “I mean… Can we physically have sex to have a baby? I’m going to say yes considering we did it last night without the baby-making part.” She gives him a shove at his joke. “Be serious. Do you think we can do it?” she chuckles. His smile turns to a straight line, “I do. And in the instant that we think that we can’t, we will have each other to rely on.” She takes a second to process what he is saying and makes her decision. “Okay, let’s do this.”

Taglist: @winterrrnight @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @wickedlovely121 @thepatriarchykeychain @drewsmusee @starkowswife @maybankslover @forstarkey @loving-and-dreaming @magicalyoura

[hannibals-favourite-meal]

.⋆｡Make Him Better Looking｡⋆.

Sam Winchester x plus size reader

Truth serum plus hidden feelings and a major amount of lust for your best friend is bound to end well

Warnings: truth serum, reader is hornee, implied smut, size kink, Sam is taller than the reader, explicit thoughts, mutual pining, mentions of a hunt

WC: 1.1k

Minors DNI

Library- @hannibals-favourite-meal-library

Falling in love with Sam had been easy- not only was he stupidly handsome with those big hazel puppy dog eyes and a killer body, but he was kind and he was smart. He loved with his whole soul and would do anything for anyone, even after all the shit he had been through. 

What hadn’t been easy, however, was just how horny you got every time you even thought of the giant hunter let alone be around him. If he was tracing lines in a book to keep his place, you thought about what his fingers would feel like inside of you. If he was working out, you wondered if he would make those same noises in bed. And worst of all was when he was talking animatedly about something, his entire body came alive with passion and excitement. His eyes sparkled and his smile was always huge. And yet all you could think about was having his face between your thick thighs, talking into your cunt as he feasted. 

Needless to say, you had absolutely destroyed your scant collection of toys and taken more cold showers than warm. Eventually, you had to reach your breaking point.

It had been a witch hunt in Arkansas that went slightly wrong. People all around town were suddenly compelled to tell everyone around them their darkest secrets, ruining their lives in the process. It was a pretty simple cut and dry witch who had some vendetta against liars so she was forcing everyone to tell the truth. You and Jody picked up the hunt as some kind of demented girl’s trip and it mostly went off without a hitch. At least until the witch got you with a truth spell right before the sheriff dropped her.

You had arrived back home with your mouth practically sewn shut in an attempt to keep yourself from telling the boys your innermost thoughts until the spell wore off (which Jody assured you that it would be a couple days at most). Claire and Alex already had their fun asking you questions that you could no longer lie in response to, leading to them learning why there’s a bottle of deluded bleach and air freshener in the back of the Impala and the ‘no tequila after midnight’ rule. 

Dean quickly discovered your ailment after you bluntly told him that his new orange flannel and grown out hair made him look like an oversized carrot, and he was determined to break you. But unfortunately for him, you were a hell of a lot smarter than him and could find ways to easily distract him.

You and Dean sat across from each other at the library table, eyes locked to each other as you both desperately tried not to blink. A game born out of desperation not to reveal your darkest secrets and childish rivalry but with a month’s worth of laundry on the line, the game was a matter of life or death. Your eyes burned as you struggled to keep them open but you refused to back down now, especially when Dean’s face had begun to turn red with the strain, you knew he was close to breaking.

Then, disaster struck. Right as his eyelids began to twitch with the need to blink, Sam walked into the library wearing a tight white shirt and grey sweatpants and obviously not wearing briefs. Immediately your mouth went dry as your concentration was broken. You didn’t even hear Dean cheer that he won, you just kept looking at his  brother who was now browsing the many shelves for something to read.

Dean rubbed at his eyes while glancing at his younger brother before sarcastically remarking. “Looking good Sammy.” Sam responded with a scoff, returning to his search and letting you get a glimpse of his perky backside.

The words tumbled from your lips before you could stop them, spilling out of your dirty mind like an unstoppable river. “Goddamn, how about you bring that perfect ass over here and I’ll tell you how I can make you look even better.” Everyone froze, including you, and then you opened your mouth again. “You’d look hotter with me sitting on your face.”

Silence settled over the bunker, your veins filled with dread. “Oh god please ignore that I said that- well actually, I don’t want you to ignore it. I really do want to sit on your face but right now I really want to throw myself off a cliff. So I think I’m gonna go do that. Have a nice life boys.” You went to slip from your chair but suddenly your wide hips were pinned to the edge of the table but two huge hands.

Sam loomed over you, his eyes dark with lust as he smirked down at you. “Now why would you go and do that when we could test your little theory.” Your breath caught in your throat. He dipped down, bringing his face to yours until you were close enough to feel his breath on your lips. 

“I-“ You stammered. Wetness pooled between your thighs as he stepped even closer, pressing his hardening cock to your soft body. 

“Oh what is it baby? Can’t speak anymore? Don’t worry, you won’t be able to stop making sounds when my mouth is on your cunt.” He growled into your ear.

Neither you nor Sam noticed when Dean sprung to his feet and ran off into the depths of the bunker to escape the very obvious tension on the brink of exploding between you. Your fingers tentatively curled into his shirt, making his smile grow. “That’s a good girl, now how about you go to my room and get undressed. I wanna see if you get even more beautiful when you’re on top of me.” 

——————

Sam had always found you incredibly intoxicating but even more so now. You were dead asleep on his chest, your breaths even as you slumbered on. Sam took pride in your exhaustion considering he was the cause. He gently stroked the soft skin of your hip, tracing over the texture of your stretch marks delicately as to not wake you. 

You sighed in your sleep, nuzzling closer to his bare chest. He kissed the top of your head and with a great amount of care, slipped from your hold. You stirred only for a moment before settling once more. He dressed quietly and slipped out of his room.

The smell of freshly brewed coffee wafted from the kitchen drawing him in like a siren. “Morning.” He muttered as he wandered in, shooting his brother a glance. Dean nodded at him from his place at the small table, drinking his coffee silently.

As Sam poured two mugs of the bitter drink, he spoke again. “She was right, you know.” Dean hummed and looked up at him curiously. “I do look better when she sits on my face.”

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[monarch-of-weird-girlboy-nation]

Jason Grace hcs, but they're sad

Had to wear one of those dog cone things as a little kid, mainly to really shame him

Wasn't allowed to go past the pomeranian line as a kid bc he was considered a living weapon

Cannot process receiving affection because why are they doing this what is their hidden agenda

Has an allergy (methinks carrots) but he doesn't realise it because food is food and inherent to survive and food is a privilege and why would you waste it

Also requested if he could maybe please sorry for wasting your time but maybe please please be evaluated for needing glasses? And got laughed at

Asked if he would ever go to new Rome University, and got laughed at again

Didn't really have a proper bed as a kid so just kinda slept wherever at the start and got in trouble because you aren't allowed to sleep there that's against the rules

Anyways

@euryvices @freddie-77-ao3 @seulgishaku @somewhereincairparavel @jasongraceenthusiast

[seireiteihellbutterfly]

Bleach Headcanons: Skincare

Who’s the skincare expert and who uses just soap and water?

Jushiro Ukitake:

He doesn’t believe in flashy skincare, thinking it needs to be convenient, gentle and affordable. Think of brands like Cerave, Cetaphil, and La Roche Posay. He’ll probably have a trusted cleanser he’s been using for years (centuries?), a reliable serum, maybe retinoid based (gotta use something anti-aging at this stage) and a good, hydrating moisturizer (illness makes his skin dry and he hates looking that way). 

Byakuya Kuchiki:

Can and will only buy the best of the best. A skincare snob. Even if there’s an amazing drugstore brand, he refuses to use it. SK II, Tatcha, and La Mer are all you’ll find in his bathroom cabinet. Of course he follows the 7 step Korean skincare routine. Cleanse twice, toner, essence, serum, moisturizer eye cream. Adds a sunscreen if he plans on going out. He will not compromise his routine for anything, so be prepared to wait for him as he goes through this process everyday, twice.

Renji Abarai:

He’ll pretend like he doesn’t do any skincare but he has his little stash of items he uses for self-indulgence. He enjoys wearing face masks (thanks to Rukia), which he applies after using a cleanser that’s trending, like from Tula or Drunk Elephant. The man somehow has balanced skin so he’ll use an everyday moisturizer like the Clinique Moisture Surge. 

Kensei Muguruma:

He uses his body wash as face wash, and whatever body moisturizer he has on hand he uses on his face too. What’s the point after all? It’s skin. As long as it’s clean and not cracking, there isn’t a problem. 

Mayuri Kurotsuchi:

He creates his own skincare but it’s kind of questionable. He claims his skin can tolerate quite a lot, so his skincare always has heavy amounts of acids in it; glycolic acid, salicylic acid, ascorbic acid. Top this off with a heavy dosage retinol. Does it work? We may never know from all the makeup he uses on his face. At least he removes all of it before sleeping (?). 

Kisuke Urahara:

He also makes his own concoctions, but in a much less dramatic way than Mayuri. Grows his own ingredients, like oranges for vitamin C, mint for salicylic acid, and carrots for retinol. Think of his products like a  clean, organic skincare line that he wouldn’t sell to anyone unless he’s happy with it himself. He rarely buys commercially available products but the one thing he will spend his money on is sheet masks, they’re convenient and he honestly finds them tedious to make on his own.

Shinji Hirako:

He may not show it, but this man is very self conscious about his appearance. He has a mix of both popular and indie skin care brands. Think Belif, Youth to the People and Drunk Elephant. He probably regularly cleanses and uses a moisturizer, maybe something with vitamin C in it, since he can’t have people seeing the dark circles under his eyes.

Ichigo Kurosaki:

Essence? Toner? Serums? Isn’t a cleanser just soap? Give him some bar soap and a CeraVe moisturizer. He doesn’t have time to figure this shit out. There’s people that need to be saved and stuff. 

Rose Otoribashi:

Yes, he knows the difference between a toner and an essence. He also thinks essences are a gimmick. Give him a balancing cleanser for his oily skin, and a toner with some salicylic acid in it to further help the oil. Add a vitamin C serum and a lightweight moisturizer and he’s ready to rock. 

[thoughtportal]

homemade vegan vegetable stock cubes

What could you do with leftover vegetables scraps at the end of the week? Make stock cubes! You can use any sort of leftover vegetables to make your own all natural stock cubes! The process is super straightforward and you can make enough to store and use for months.

Ingredients 🥦🥕🍠🟨

1kg Assorted leftover vegetables (carrot peels,celery, broccoli stems ,cauliflower leaves,soft veg ,onion, leeks, mushrooms, etc.)

4 x cloves of garlic

1 teaspoon of salt

1 teaspoon of nutritional yeast

Herbs & spices

Salt & pepper

Olive oil Instructions 🥣

Gather your leftover vegetables and make sure they are clean and edible.

Chop the vegetables into smaller pieces

Sauté them with 2 tbsp of olive oil until

They release all the flavours and most of the water has evaporated

Let the veg cool for a bit

In a blender add the cooked vegetables , garlic,spices and herbs salt & black pepper.

Blend the mixture until it becomes a smooth puree.

Line a flat, shallow pan with parchment paper. Pour the vegetable puree onto the pan and smooth it out evenly.

Place the pan in the freezer and let it freeze until it’s solid.

Remove the frozen vegetable puree from the pan and cut it into cubes.

(Optional )Wrap each cube in parchment paper or place them in an airtight container. Store the wrapped cubes in the freezer .

Now you have your homemade vegan vegetable stock cubes in a convenient frozen form to enhance the flavor of your recipes whenever needed. Just take out a cube or two from the freezer for your cooking!

{watch}

[allroundvp]

Allround Vegetable Processing offers a superior range of sorting, grading, washing, polishing, brushing, weighing, bagging, and material handling lines. Next to that, you can count on us for storage equipment and loading and unloading lines for multiple vegetables.

[amuseoffyre]

Have had a couple of days and a rewatch and some mulling to put together my thoughts:

The good:

the writing - I've talked at length about the use of metaphor, symbolism, allegory and the like to add meat and substance to the narrative

the continuity tied in to S1 and the foreshadowing coming full circle, plus running themes continuing

the music is flawless throughout - both the soundtrack with songs and the original score and the way old motifs are used to add parallels and depth to scenes

the acting across the board has been staggeringly good. Especially for Taika, Rhys and Con. I can see why so many reviews had been raving about it.

the bits of set-up for S3 that have been planted if/when they get it

new characters who are an absolute delight

Family Trauma the TV show - intense to watch but cathartic af

Badass ladies and the soft boys who love them

Auntie.

The bad:

too much story and not enough time to tell it

sacrificing a lot of crew-related stuff - I know this is primarily the Ed and Stede story, but we're told that Olu was always talking about Zheng, but we never even got a single line of it. Buttons' disappearance gets one sus line. We gloss over the probation and why Ed is back in his leathers literally the next day. Again, I know, time constraints, but it does feel weaker for it.

speedrunning so much that it's taken several rewatches to catch everything that's going on - yes, it can work as a narrative device, but not all the time

still not over Zheng falling for Ricky's gift. Do not trust the aristocratic white dude, especially not when you've been blackmailing him. And I know there's some logical sense to her being so used to being able to manipulate desperate people on the fringes with both carrot and stick, but it feels like severe underestimation on her part about how ruthless and cruel and petty Ricky could be. He's not like the pirates - he has the power and privilege and it feels like she ignored that.

whatever that Teal Oranges pivot was so Jim could have a girlfriend, especially since they didn't have time/space to actually develop the Olu/Zheng and Jim/Archie stuff. Archie was barely a scrape of characterisation because of time constraints.

The ... Forbs Boding

Izzy - it falls under the typical archetype of Loss of a Role Model especially given all Ed's dad issues, which I thought we were beyond, but then it also fits with the running motif of the show of change, death and rebirth. We've had confirmation of the existence of a place between life and death plus a character who was beaten to death coming back from it and a seawitch turning up at the grave. I can see why it was done as it has been foreshadowed since "the only retirement we get is death" but after all his growth in S2, having Ricky be the one to get the jump on him is... hm. I feel like they had him and Ricky talking and Ricky causing his death for a reason. Feels like there's set-up for S3 planted and ready. My Forbs, they are A-Boding. ffs, they Obi-Wanned him right after he did a speech about "our spirit will last beyond your whole fucking empire". Strike me down and I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine vibes.

The way trauma is/isn't being dealt with - I feel like there's stuff there that is set up for S3 as well, because we've seen how Stede is still bottling all his stuff and hasn't dealt with any of it, while Ed has done some processing and started to make peace with himself over it. Stede still has his mental lockbox and while he tries to pretend it isn't there, it still informs so many of his decisions.

All the Star Wars vibes - I've always been convinced this was the Empire Strikes Back season and now, they have all the pieces in play for the Return of the Jedi arc: Stede and Ed are together and recovering but will have a role to play, Izzy is in carbonite with a seawitch control panel, their allies are out there getting pieces in place, and the Imperial figurehead villain who showed up in S2 is still out there and convinced he holds all the power. And I just realised that this means that if they use Hornigold, he's the equivalent of Boba Fett - Bounty Hunter for the Empire XD

On the whole, I am content with it and am already having thoughts about the potential for S3, but I find it incredibly frustrating knowing how much more it could have been with the budget/time they wanted and didn't get.

[clavissionary-position]

Ikeprinces Ranked By Birthday Candle Extinguishing Skills

*A baseline of 34 candles is used

1. CHEVALIER

You came here today hoping to see Chevalier blow out 34 candles with a single huff of his laugh. You leave here today after seeing Chevalier chuck his sword at an intruding Clavis, where the mere act of drawing said-sword produced a blade of wind so supreme that not only the candles on his cake but all candles in a 10-room radius were decimated down to their quivering wicks.

2. LUKE

You would think Luke would have no problem. He’s a Big Fuccin Lad with Big Fuccin Lungs. And you'd be right, except he gets bored during the process of you lighting 34 candles and decides he'd much rather get to work on devouring you first. Your make-out sesh lasts up until you see the still-burning near-stub shape of 34 candles out of the corner of your eye. At which point Luke does the whole snuffing-a-flame-out-with-one's-fingers thing except it's 34 candles versus his gigantic fist.

3. JIN

You’ve set the cake down in front of him; he’s distracting you with playful acts of misplaced hands and roaming lips; you're both chatting, laughing, and somewhere amidst that revelry he leans over and takes all 34 spirited flames out with little more than a casual exhale. The candles are in the way now, and you two happily work them off the cake before putting the dessert to more stimulating use.

4. SARIEL

Your unwavering faith in him in the face of this celebratory sea of fire is enough to marshal the air in his lungs out through his bewitching, decadently puckered lips. Not that the candles wouldn't have already voluntarily noped off the cake in perfect rank-and-file regardless of your presence, but you being here today makes Sariel lean into mischief. (Candle POV: OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY—*cut off by static*)

5. YVES

He trips while carrying the cake and the candles put themselves out. That's what the preliminary report written by an anti-Obsidian palace minister says, anyway. In reality, Yves strategically and deftly rearranges the candles before you light them. The new formation is much easier to take down with minimal exertion. The most touching moment is not when he takes out all the candles at once, but when he sits back, satisfied, chest puffed out while his eyes are wide with disbelief that he’s actually able to get something right.

6. RIO

Rio can do anything he sets his mind to if you set his mind onto it first. When you surprise him with the cake, he clearly reads the expectation in your glittering gaze. He knows you don’t care if he can take out all the candles in one go or not, but he still has his pride. He pulls his chair closer to the cake before giving you that charming, blue sky of a smile and holding both your hands under the table. At the end of a simple countdown that he gives himself, he wipes all the flames across the board so spectacularly that you feel as though you’ve witnessed a magic trick.

7. LICHT

He blows out 33 but the final candle refuses to yield. Palms on either side of the cake now, Licht leans in, his brow set into a stern line. He draws a deep breath while eyeing you to make sure you're a safe distance away. You don’t see him exchange that fleeting, somber glance with Nokto. It is the hidden conversation of wombmates: if something happens to Licht, Nokto is to look after you. After making peace with his fate, Licht squares his shoulders, zeroes in on the remaining candle, and puckers his lips...

8. NOKTO

He blows out more than half, presumably exhausting his skills, before spontaneously refusing to extinguish the rest unless you do him a favor in return. Apparently this favor has nothing to do with giving him a kiss or letting him get handsy with you because he’s already doing that as he presents the deal. Stripping? You two were naked to begin with. So what is it then? When you ask Nokto to elaborate, he pins you to the bed and asks if you’ll replace the candles with carrots because that would make things a whole lot easier for him. You follow-up with the perfectly valid point of “blowing out burning carrots means you’re rescuing them.” A point which Nokto begrudgingly accepts before quickly blowing out the rest of the candles so he can bury himself inside you.

9. LEON

34 candles is no problem for him, but he would much rather intentionally draw the process out and extinguish only a handful at a time. Poor Leon, he's having suuuuch a tough time of it. You’ll help out, won't you? Sit on his lap while you work together? This cake business is really digging into his private time with you. Wouldn’t it be better to just leave it for now and… He grins at your insistence, suddenly walking off, but coming back behind you and surprising you so astoundingly that your yelp extinguishes the rest of the candles before being cut off by a whirlwind kiss.

10. KEITH

He is absolutely determined not to let his alter switch in for this. If he can't do something as simple as blow out 34 birthday candles then what hope does he have of looking かっこいい in your eyes? After several minutes of tense discussion, both Keiths arrive at an agreement to let Shy Keith have 50 attempts to get it right before Wicked Keith steps in to save the birthday. Of course you’re fully aware that the only reason such a ridiculous margin would be offered is if a certain someone had no intention of interfering in the first place. Nevertheless it takes Shy Keith 49 tries to get every single candle in one go, just as he’s always dreamed. Like a tiny supernova in the darkness of the greenhouse. Before a couple of nearby plants catch fire.

11. SILVIO

He blows all 34 candles out in one flashy exhale, and all 34 candles instantly revive in one sassy flicker. He glares at you, then, as if you and the candles and Rio are conspiring together. But the truth is he's just embarrassed and mad at himself for looking like such a loser in front of you. Carlo gets ordered to produce a second cake with more agreeable candles. You snap at Silvio about wasting a perfectly good cake. You try not to be grumpy about it for the duration of the party, but it’s hard to stay mad when the first cake reappears in your shared bedroom later with a very different fate in store for it… "Dammit, do I gotta spell it out!? I'm sayin' I need you to blow the damn candles out for me first!"

12. GILBERT

He could resort to a simple stage trick to avoid exerting himself at all if he so wanted, but instead he refuses to engage with the candles altogether in favor of casually threatening you to do it for him. When you childishly complain that his birthday wish won’t come true like this, he gently cups your face and assures you that your wish is more than enough to count for his (while also being conducive to the world’s continued existence).

13. CLAVIS

It’s like a music box. Or a self-playing piano. Each syllable of his infamous laughter triggers a subset of the candles to go out. When all is said and done, you push the birthday hellcat aside to investigate, but to your surprise, the candles are totally legita… no they’re not. And why do they smell like that!? Clavis wraps an arm around your waist to give you a tour of how his miraculous candles work… and how edible they are, down to the wick. He gets last-place for using his own materials but first-place for showmanship and inventing edible flammable non-toxic candles in the medieval age.

[fibretwo]

.˚⊹. ࣪ Things To Understand To Reduce Binging 𓉸 ࣪⊹˚.

(Apologies if my english is shit, first language is german)

Wsg gang, so my post about what to do after a binge people seemed to like, so i want to share with you some stuff that helped me stop binging!

I’m no expert on this topic, but i’m a few hours off being 6 days binge free and the last binge i had was literally eating dinner so i guess i can still give some tips! Anyway, here we go :3

So, to start off, processed foods are supposed to be addictive, most of my favourite binge foods are counted as “highly processed foods” which means they have “formulations of ingredients, mostly of exclusive industrial use, typically created by a series of industrial techniques and processes.”

This means these foods are made in labs and genetically modified to satisfy you and make you want more. Understanding this can help you understand why it can be important to refuse these foods, as eating them will make you want more down the line, or even in the moment. See, if you are eating an addictive food, chances are you won’t want to stay away from it, which is why portion control can be tough when you want more of these addictive foods.

Now, i do want to say it is definitely somewhat hypocritical saying you shouldn’t eat artificial foods. I, much like most people on edblr, am a sucker for sugar free sodas with artificial sweeteners. However, binging on processed foods means it just leaves you wanting more.

Secondly, food is designed to taste good. For example, carrots were mostly purple in colour, and tasted starchy (or that’s what my science teacher said chat, i just know they were purple). Overtime, they’ve been genetically modified to appear to the taste buds, which yeah, it worked. However, some of the best foods for you will never taste as good as a chocolate bar or a bowl of microwaved noodles. That’s because food is a necessity to keep you alive, not something to satisfy cravings and fuel your senses. My brother told me he saw a tiktok that said something along the lines of “the human body can go three days without water, however the human body can go up to a month without food, yet we still have to eat every few hours or so.” — thus proving that food is an addiction.

I hope this helped. I’m working on a list of stuff i do to avoid binging. If you feel a binge urge coming on, you can always reach out to me if you feel it will help. Drink water, stay hydrated and take care of yourselves to the best of what you’re comfortable with. You are enough <3

Rock on 🤘

- luv from Maverick <3

[velvetcloxds]

HSHDHS YES and I can imagine just having dinner trying to comfort Derek touching his arm or something and he flinches so hard trying not to elicit a good reaction cuz Chris is watching😭

MONIQUE OHMYGOD I NEED A DEREK VERSION OF CRAZY STUPID LOVE NOW SJFHDH like it’s one of my favorite rom coms ever and it’s fitting perfectly right about now😭😭 and that pose with Der omg!!

CRAZY STUPID LOVE | D.H.

word count: 1k

warnings: age gap, dbf!derek, argent!reader, "I met you while trying to kill you for being a werewolf but then you helped me get a girl to help me get over my wife and now you're dating my daughter" vibes, fem!reader

Derek wore his fancy jacket, his "this is serious" jacket, his "today you're a gentleman jacket"- how was he to know he'd need more than his jacket and his perfect meet-the-family lines to win over his best friend to let him continue dating his daughter? Dinner was awkward to say the very least, neither your dad nor Derek had acknowledged where they knew each other from before meeting tonight, the night of your birthday dinner, but it was clear there was history there and no one was going to say something first so no one was yet to say anything at all.

Your dad was slicing at his steak in a way that made the whole act seem a little personal, his eyes on Derek's every move as the werewolf tried not to react to you slipping your hand onto his knee like you always did, it was one of his favorite little gestures which is why you were a little surprised when he didn't slip his hand onto yours right away, taking a big gulp from his wine glass in the process

"You two are pretty cozy," your dad noted and you were grateful for Allison's presence next to you to share in a questioning stare because does no one remember you coming home from at least a hundred dates talking about just how amazing Derek was? "What's it been like a week or two?"

"Dad, we've been dating for a few months now," you breathed, not even thinking as you scooped the crunchy carrots from your plate into Derek's, smiling your usual sweet smile and silently asking him to get rid of them for you. "I'd say it would be a little weird if we weren't cozy," you scoffed, thumb brushing over Derek's as you leaned into his side, extremely confused when it made him take in a loud breath of air. You didn't want it to be too obvious when you gave him a little look to ask what was wrong, but it wouldn't have mattered because the man wasn't even looking at you to begin with.

"So, Derek, have you two thought any more about moving in together?" Allison had no idea the terror her question would cause both Derek and your dad looking at her with complete horror as she took another bite of the bread Derek made. "What?" you were curious too, finally being able to meet your boyfriend's gaze and having no idea why he would be so surprised by the question when you talked about it just the previous day.

"Are you okay?" Your question was quiet really, only for his ears but it drew your dad's attention still, the echo of his knife hitting the plate enough to steal your focus. "Are you okay?" you reprised your question to the man opposite of you.

"You're dating my daughter," he wasn't looking at you, eyes burning right into the side of Derek's head before he snapped to meet his gaze, explanation already on his tongue. "You're dating my daughter," he repeated and boy were you lost but by the looks of it you'd be caught up real soon. "You want to move in with my daughter? You?" he had stood up now, plate clinking against the table in the process, glass almost tipping were it not for Derek being fast enough to catch it. "The man who taught me the best way to get a woman to sleep with me wants to move in with my daughter?" Allison swallowed a gasp. You weren't sure who to question first but your dad was moving before you had time to think it through.

"Dad!" you didn't even hesitate before jumping up and moving in front of Derek, stopping the man with your hands firmly on his chest and your face blocking his gaze before he could get close enough to Derek's chair. "Let's take a breath."

"Look, Chris, I can explain."

"Maybe not this second, babe," your tongue slipped, you didn't even realize you'd thrown the petname in there but your dad sure did and it did little to aid your case, even less when Derek stood up behind you, hand falling to your waist out of pure habit as you pushed back a little to stop your dad from moving. "You're the guy he's been playing wingman to?" a little angered nod was all you got in reply. ''And, Der, you're the floozy playboy that's been giving him dating advice?" You couldn't hide your amusement even if you tried your hardest.

"Yes, but this was before I met you and heaven knows not even my best tips worked on her so trust me when I say, Chris, this is different," With his voice back he was brave, very smooth when he took hold of your elbow and guided you behind him. "Look if you want to punch me then I'll give you one free shot but then best believe I'm taking a shot of my own, old man."

"Don't tempt me," your dad was less brave now, narrowed eyes shifting between you and his so-called friend with enough disapproval to write a novel but all he offered was a grunt of defeat. "It goes without saying that I do not even slightly approve of this."

"I don't blame you," your hands gripped his biceps as Derek spoke, you gave a little squeeze to his arms before you peeked your head over his shoulder. "You need time, I get it, we need to talk things out but eventually you'll see that this is different."

"Very," you noted, chin on his shoulder as you nodded, and were it another time anyone would be able to recognize just how cute the gesture was. "He talks a big game, Dad, but he's actually a big uncool softie," you teased and you were happy when Derek smiled, even happier when your dad gave a soft scoff.

"Careful, now," Derek warned and it was entirely not his intent to rub anything in Chris' face but he couldn't even stop himself from pulling you around and into his side, smiling lightly as you looked up at him. "I have a reputation to protect."

"Oh, mister womanizer, how could I forget?" you laughed and stole a glance over the table to where Allison was starting to clean up the dirty dishes. "Why don't you take your brooding self over to the kitchen to help my sister with the dishes and I'll try and convince my dad not to try and murder you again before dessert, " you had no doubt the idea was still very much lingering in his head.

"Yes ma'am," and Chris had to be blind not to notice just how happy you were, just how alarmingly different the little moment between you was to anything he'd seen from Derek before but it would take a hell of a lot more to convince him not to take him out in his sleep.

"So, you had any luck with his advice yet?" It was far too soon to joke about it but you'd not be his daughter if you didn't at least try.

"I need a drink."

[lakesbian]

THAT WAS GREAT I LOVE YOU HELEN. personally i think there could have been way more helen in it because it felt brief but im hoping there will be more helen later also. cannot believe helen/mary is real like i dreamed. also awwww 😭 helen being confused about how she can like lillian even though she doesn't want to kill lillian and it being clarified through lillian bringing her a cake that's even More satisfying than murder...literally cake is one of her biological imperatives!!! helen is such a sweetieheart i love her . the casual body horror is so good her thought processes are so good. it's interesting how her emotions seem to be even further developed from when we last saw her...she's growing into herself. also the obvious set-up of the lambs being given the Perfect reason to terribly terribly desire to bring sy and jamie back is like alright i see how we're doing this lmao. that'll work.

oh yeah and oh my god the "i like squished things" from helen after lillian says her carrot cake got squished. Literally my favorite helen line ever. It's just so perfectly uncanny and utterly fantastic in context. i think we should get one helen interlude every arc because of how perfect she is. okay now time to go find out what arc 11 is all about....nervousexcited i hope it doesn't fuck anything up because im Invested right now