#car battery box hill

[mraprilfools]

Word Count: 5.1k

Rating: M Pairing: Queer-Platonic Alastor/Vox

CW/TW: Canon-typical violence

Summary: Alastor and Vox decide to go see a new play outside town! They pick up some company along the way. Full story under the cut

“The entertainment district has many fine theaters overflowing with talent. Men and women of all ages putting their hearts and souls into these pitiful distractions. All meant to keep the lowly and miserable from realizing how worthless their lives truly are. But the finest of all lies outside our dear corner of hell and upon the lofty hills of The Upper District! If one is to see art, one ought to not settle for fine or passable! But the divine-- don’t you think?” An intermingling of thick static spoke each word as grandly as if on broadcast in that instant. A golden crescent smile shone even in the darkness of the moving car, matching with the menacing red of his eyes.

Competing with Vox’s natural luminosity, the sphere of their luminous influence melted into a gentle violet. Always pushing and pulling; meeting together in a violet horizon. One claw was settled on the wheel, and the boxy frame of Vox’s remained facing forward so all Alastor could see was the smooth matte surface. The car crawled to a stop in one of the more isolated corners of the city.

Exhaustion marked Vox’s expression-- he had always given into Alastor’s demands however lofty. But when you passed by twenty different theaters because he had to see Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde performed by a certain troupe it felt exhausting. But who was he kidding? He always acquiesced.

“And that’s why we got to take the car tonight. It’s a thirty-minute walk otherwise. Look, it’s just a quick stop to give Rosie her candied hearts and we’ll head straight there.” Vox’s claw turned upward as he spoke, only looking at the man he was speaking to when the engine shut off. “Besides, if I let my baby sit in the garage for too long the battery will die.”

Parking space in Cannibal Town was always left wanting. They had to settle for a small lot behind a small shopping strip that mainly was used to load and unload products. These isolated corners always had a way of bringing out the sinners driven insane by their immortality. And these roads were always filled with cannibals. Hungry for the meals sitting inside a tin and glass box. Thankfully, Alastor’s fearsome presence would usually scare them off, which made him the car babysitter tonight. Much to his chagrin.

“It’s a lovely night! Not a single cloud in the sky, the evening’s a beautiful shade of scarlet, and the temperature is positively mild. Your rust-- vehicle’s weak battery is truly none of my concern.”

As tempting as it was to disparage the tin coffin he was dragged into, this car was the first thing Vox scrimped and saved and fawned over. The memory of how excited he was to show it to Alastor first. And their first drive was still one of his fondest memories. Especially the slaughter after! So Alastor couldn’t disparage it-- completely. Not that Vox wasn’t waiting for it with squinted distrustful eyes.

For his audacity, Alastor reached out and poked one of Vox’s antennae. A directed radio signal cut and disturbed the display on his head. Starting first with his voice cutting out. “AL-GAAh-- Kkzrrrzshhhhhhhh----”, Then graduating to a multi-colored block that had written in large letters: No Signal. At one point Vox had altered the display to say, ‘Fuck you Alastor’ but that only made him more inclined to see it so Vox quickly changed that back.

Hands returned to his lap, Alastor waited with a smile like the cat who caught the canary. He had to look his most smug when Vox regained himself. Clamped cyan teeth greeted him with a swirling in Vox’s red eye. The old picture was so cute when he was upset, it inspired laughter in the radio demon. A laughter that extinguished the building rage in the other man. “Ugh, you’re in one of your moods aren’t you.” Vox sighed.

“You only have yourself to blame dear Picture-box. Whenever I get in this car you know how I get.” Alastor leaned forward, pushing himself deliberately into Vox’s personal space.

“Yeah! Because I can’t get you to get in it unless I promise to tear a man open for you like a Christmas present! We’ll miss the opening act if we take any more detours you know. Anyway, I’ll be only a few minutes, watch the car for me.” Vox shoved open the car door, smacking away a cannibal who got a little too close in the process. Bright blue electricity crackled from his iron claws as a warning to the hungry children of the night. Wherever the pale blue glow reached, they shied away from; retreating to the safety of the shadows. A couple of cold clicks for his fingers emphasized what exactly these cannibals were dealing with if they got too close. A blaring noise from his screens scared them out of their wits, scampering into the unknown.

The door closed behind Vox with a thud, and he took a brief detour to grab the red box sitting in the back.

Alastor sat back and enjoyed the show, even if sitting alone in a dark car was never his favorite. He hated any dark cramped space, hence his dislike for the vehicle. Doubly so left alone in it. The man’s luminous presence was the only reason he could stomach it at all! So once Vox was out of sight, he opened the other door and stepped outside. The crickets were noisy tonight, one could almost hear them over the low hiss of the cannibal children. Alastor’s signal buzzed with delight, he was a man who appreciated the natural beauty of hell.

“Happy Birthday Rosie! I’m sorry it’s a little late. Alastor wanted to make them personally, so it took us a while to… organically source them. You know how he loves to over-sample.” Vox put on his best smile for Rosie as he handed her the box. Already changed into her evening clothes, she only kept half the door cracked open when she answered it. When she recognized who it was, all caution was thrown to the wind. She cracked it wide open in invitation, the hollows of her eyes wide in excitement.

“Vox! How GOOD to see you dear! And this is from the both of you?!” Into her waiting hands, Vox slipped the box. She wasted little time to undo the beautiful red silk ribbon, peeking at the sweets inside.

“Of course, nothing but the best for our favorite lady.” Charm came easy for the TV anchor, and doubly so when he was telling the truth. Rosie was no stranger to it, but it didn’t make it any less charming through the years. One may even say his consistency made it all the more flattering.

“Where’s Alastor?” Rosie leaned to the side, hoping to spy on the other Overlord. Not a fuzzy red ear in sight.

“He’s watching the car. We’re going to see the new Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde play in the Upper District. It’s a long walk so I barely convinced him to get into a car with me. Your cannibals don’t like it… much.”

Rosie giggled, the hollows of her eyes upturning in genuine mirth. “Oh, they just want to chew on the tires a little dear! If you feed them a bone they’ll leave you alone.”

“I’ll remember that for next time… I guess even Cannibals get hangry.” Felt awful like the same way Vox calmed down Alastor from his bad moods. Throw him a sinner or two and he was as sweet as a kitten-- As Mimzy likes to put it.

“Oh absolutely! Nothing quite like a cannibal getting hangry either. We’ll try to take bites right out of you!” Rosie flipped her hand, punctuating the statement with a laugh. “But don’t let me keep you, you two have a lovely night alright? Tell Alastor I said hello!”

Vox forced a laugh, thankful for the distance between the two at the moment. One would think his unique mechanical biology would dissuade them but-- it only made them damn more curious. Vox preferred to stay intact, repairs were expensive! “You have a night as lovely as you are, Rosie!”

The door snuffed out the pale yellow light, submerging Vox in darkness. More keen having once been blinded. A few cannibals in the bushes stared at him with their dark hollowed eyes. Vox conjured another burst of electricity crackling at his palm to dissuade them.

Beyond all expectations, Vox was happy to see that Alastor was still in the seat, waiting for him. Still wearing that familiar Cheshire grin that he swore grew whenever their eyes first met. It always gave Vox the sneaking suspicion he was up to something; but when wasn’t he?

The car shook with the added weight when Vox stepped inside, sticking the key right into the ignition. “Rosie says hello. Thanks for watching the car for me Al.” The engine whined before it roared to life. Sending gentle vibrations throughout the entire vehicle.

“Not a problem! You know, as long as you show you’re not scared of them they’ll leave you alone. They’re only looking for an easy meal-- and you look hardly appetizing. No offense.” A total fabrication. Alastor had been tempted more than once to sink his teeth into that firm flesh, wondering if it tasted any different from other sinners. But he could never justify testing his theory in case it scared the little overlord off.

“None taken.” Vox pinched the rear-view mirror, adjusting it to look out the back. His hand froze when he found there was a black silhouette in the back seat of his BMW. Vox squinted, then immediately swiveled his head to cast light on the figure in the back. An elk sinner sat there with their head hanging low. A dark liquid dripped all over his nice pleather seats, dripping onto the floor. Vox didn’t need much imagination to guess what.

“Is that a dead body in the back seat?”

“To be fair darling, you left me alone,” Alastor stated, looking over his nails. “Don’t worry. He’s still alive, for now.”

The artificial glow of Vox’s monitor revealed more of the figure. Their chest was moving, but only barely. There were signs of claws raking all over the body but it was shock that had knocked him unconscious if Vox had to guess. He wasn’t in danger of dying in his back seat, for now. Only torn open just enough to bleed. All over his car. No plastic liner or anything. Vox rapped his claws against the wheel, counting to ten to silence the scream building in him. Screaming only ever made Alastor wall him off completely. When he found his cool, Vox forced a smile as he met Alastor’s eyes. Speaking through clenched teeth.

“And why is there a bleeding all over my back seat?”

Alastor cocked his head to the side, large fluffy ears bouncing with the movement. Deliberately done, Alastor was well aware of how weak Vox was to them. A faint light blue blush crawled over Vox’s screen, making the white freckles on the screen more prominent. The wobble of his lips danced as teeth flashed in and out of view. A smack of a fist against the car wheel sounded his defeat. What soft muttering protests he could muster came out unintelligible.

“You know the cost of getting me in your car, Vox. A corpse would hardly be proper! You deserve them when they’re still squirming and thrashing.”

“But-- I keep plastic liners in the trunk! You could have at least put one down! I’ll never get all that blood out!” All the wiggling of those fuzzy ears couldn’t have stopped Vox from raising his voice plaintively there.

Alastor pressed a finger against Vox’s mouth, hushing him with a click of his tongue. “Tut tut, my dear! Let’s not fight in front of Steve.”

Vox immediately bat the hand away. “You named it Steve?! Why him anyway? Did he crop dust you or something?”

The deer wrinkled his nose in disgust, offended by even the insinuation. “Oh-- no. He wouldn’t be intact if that were the case dear. I saw him trying to make off with some undergarments from a lady's clothesline. Hardly befitting a gentleman, wouldn’t you agree?”

Vox’s mouth hung open- then shut. Then the box head turned and smacked against the car wheel.

BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

The media overlord’s whole body rose and fell with his heavy sigh. “Sometimes I feel like the reason I fell to hell was because I was destined to meet you.”

“Quite the romantic sentiment-- I’m afraid you’ll need to do better than that if you wish to have a chance, my dear. I am not so easily wooed.”

Vox raised his head, shooting him a deadpan look. “Destined to meet you, so you could torment me for the rest of my Lucifer damned afterlife.”

Alastor’s signal chirped, the ends of the Radio Demon’s lips curling with delight at an equal measure to Vox’s despair. “I dearly hope so.”

It was pathetic that a single comment inspired a blush so furious Vox’s whole screen became smothered in white. Inelegant sputtering answered him with Vox immediately tearing his attention back to the road. Focusing instead on getting back on the road so they could attend that damn play. Once they passed Cannibal Town and through the busy Entertainment streets, Neon signs flashed as they passed by. Panoramas of violence, depravity, poverty, and all the typical miseries of hell sped by. Their beloved Pentagram City.

“So, the man in the back seat. You want me to kill him too? What do you even get out of that anyway? I thought you preferred to get your own hands bloody.” Vox shifted his gaze at a lull stuck behind traffic. The sight of his partner’s face was awash in the city lights, contrasted by the deep shadows. It was a rare moment to see Alastor pensive, lost in his thoughts that put him so off guard that he shared with Vox one of those rare unguarded smiles.

It was always the little things like that-- that made Alastor’s capricious moods and constant teasing all worth it. A gentle words or a smile that was for him alone and his heart would squeeze with the most delightful bittersweet pain.

“It’s good for you my dear! You cannot rely on my reputation forever you know! The big fish will come to nibble at your empire sooner rather than later. If you cannot strike fear into the hearts of the laymen, they’ll see you as easy picking. If my business takes me elsewhere for a week, what would you do?”

“You already do disappear for weeks on end! And I’ve done fine.” Vox muttered. It always jabbed at his pride when he was underestimated, well aware of the fact that he was still living in the Radio Demon’s shadow.

Vox’s fists squeezed against the leather wrap of the wheel. Cyan pupils stared hard at the road as the spiraling thoughts of his self-worth encroached at the corners of his mind. The gentle touch of Alastor’s hand on his shoulder returned him to Hell, banishing them before they could do real harm.

“True. I keep forgetting how quickly you’ve blossomed. Feels like only yesterday since I found you shaking like a kitten after I devoured… what was his name? It was something hideous.” The recollection came with a dainty tap on his chin.

Vox clicked his tongue. “Don’t remember either. Guy was an asshole though! Hiked my rent for the third month in a row! Landlords. Figures they’d all end up here.” Capitalism was great! When it wasn’t keeping the go-getters like him down! But climbing a Sisyphean hill where the rent hiked faster than he could make money was a stark reminder of where Vox was.

“In any case! ANY normal person would be terrified! You don’t exactly have the best table-side manners when you hunt. I had nightmares for weeks where I heard nothing but you chewing on that guy's bones.” Vox shuddered at the memory. Years later? He’d become so used to it that he slept soundly without losing a wink of sleep these days. It was crazy how hell had you desensitized to everything. What remained of his humanity slipped by the day if anything was left.

The blare of a horn behind them impatiently urged Vox to drive faster. A suggestion he paid no heed to, driving even slower in a deliberate attempt to piss the driver off further. The wailing of the horn sped by as the driver slipped into the other lane, flashing the finger at him even as raced past. For all his impatience, he almost ended up slamming into another car. The wild swerving had him hit a bloody corpse on the road. Spiraling until the car flipped and crashed taking under it a few sinners happening to take a walk.

Vox and Alastor both broke out into dry laughter, with Alastor pointing at one of the mangled bodies thrown over the pavement. When lost in schadenfreude, Alastor lost what elegance he normally possessed with his eyes going cross-eyed. The particularly gorey way the brains splattered over the pavement was a visual delight for the sadistic deer.

All the laughter had the misfortune of waking the poor victim still bleeding all over Vox’s nice car seat. “Where the hell am I…?”

Alastor’s head turned ninety degrees, greeting the sinner with his dazzling luminous smile. His good mood had warped his appearance into something terrifying. Eyes now the shape of dials frantically swinging like a haywire pendulum. “Good morning!”

“HOLY FUCK!” The elk kicked back, sliding against the seat trying to put even an inch more between him and the genuine terror staring at him. As if Vox only remembered to, he hit the button locking the doors and the window. The click sent a shiver of dread through the cowering sinner. “What do you two plan to do with me?! What do you want? Money? I have money! You can have all of it! Just-- let me go!”

Alastor laughed, cracking his neck twice, extending it past the seats. Vox kept his eyes on the road, not wanting to end up like that idiot from earlier. Not that he particularly wanted to see the disturbing creepy fuck his partner could be at times.

“Don’t scare him so bad he shits himself Alastor. Or I’m making you clean it.”

A discordant signal answered Vox, souring the unhinged glee he felt from having a new toy to torment. The neck snapped back into place as he turned his head back forward. “You would be incapable of making me do anything dear. But I do know how much you adore this… bucket of bolts. In any case, I’m holding you to your end of the deal one way or another.”

Vox rolled his technicolor pupils. “We might miss the opening act. Will you be O.K with that?”

A buzz filled the air. One that the elk tried to interrupt. “Um-- excuse me. I’d… love an answer. Is this about something other than money? Drugs? Or are you… Jenna’s boyfriend? Is that what this is about?!”

Alastor kept ignoring the elk, leaning to the side with his elbow against the car door. “Even if I must miss the opening act! And I will have you know now, if you give me a half-assed performance I will pull somebody from the audience and make you try again. And again. Until you get it right. So-- best get it done right the first time Vox.”

“Of course not. When have I ever half-assed anything around you?”

Unbeknownst to Vox, Alastor watched Vox’s expressions with the reflection on the front car window. The emotive little picture box was always such a wonder, a marvel if you will. So honest around him that it was impossible to want to push all his buttons. So, he did!

“That Charleston last week didn’t feel like you gave it your all.”

“Um-- guys? Hello?!” The elk tried to get their attention by poking at Vox’s shoulder. It provoked the simultaneous reaction of both Alastor and Vox. Electrical cord and eldritch tentacle reached out in unison seizing his arm. “AIIEEEE! PLEASE STOP! LET ME GO! Fuck! FUCK FUCK FUCK! I’m sorry! Whatever I did, please I’ll do anything!”

Vox fought for control, whipping the sinner to smack against the back of his seat. “What?! I have been practicing that dance for weeks! I wore out my brand new fucking shoes because you said you’d kill me if I embarrassed you!”

“Vox. What did I tell you? Not in front of Steve. You know arguing in front of the children is terrible for their development.” Alastor tut-tutted a second time, even wiggling his leftmost ear when Vox bothered to turn his head. The incensed expression faltered immediately with his face losing all its color.

“Is your name even Steve?!” Vox spoke through the filter, only now noticing that his cords had become tangled with Alastor’s tentacles. The unfortunate sinner had tears streaming down his face. His poor luck to be in a car with a man who was only excited by his tears and the other who couldn’t be more indifferent. If anything he found the wailing more annoying.

“NO! My name is Kyle! W-will you please let me go?”

“KYLE will be fine, Al. Wait-- your name is Kyle?” Vox paused, blanching. “Ew, I’m glad I’m killing you now. Fuck any guy whose name is Kyle.”

A gloved hand hid the golden crescent on Alastor’s face, shoulders trembling from hidden laughter. The elk pinned his ears back, losing all the color in his face as fear turned the blood in his veins into ice. “Why?!”

Grown tired of it all, Alastor leaned back and gave the man the answer he craved. If only so he could stop hearing the same monotonous syllable. “It’s quite simple my friend. You happened to offend me when I was bored, now you’re my entertainment for the evening. You can try to run, and I’ll kill you instead. But it’ll be far slower than Vox. He doesn’t seem to have a love of the art like I do.”

“I don’t think anyone enjoys making people suffer half as much as you do Alastor. Besides, I can’t be horrible at it if you keep making me do it.” Much to Vox’s chagrin. “All it means to me is an extra trip to the dry cleaners.”

The slow roll of the car as they turned into a parking lot was the sinner’s signal to try and escape. Kyle yanked on the door handle, flipping it uselessly. The noisy clattering was music to the sadistic buck, watching Kyle with delight. “HELP! PLEASE SOMEBODY! ANYBODY?! THESE TWO ARE FUCKING INSANE!”

Kyle slammed his elbows into the window, yelping as the numbing shock ran through his arm. Twice, thrice he tried to smash his elbow through driven by adrenaline. Without a word Vox stepped out of the car, strolling over to Alastor’s side. He opened the door, offering his hand as if for a lady.

Alastor took the offered claw, stepping out from the car with eyes glittering wildly with anticipation. Ruby's irises flickered between Vox’s luminous screen and the sinner beating his fists against the glass walls screaming for help. A few of the theater go-ers would rubberneck, curiosity getting the best of them but… nobody was coming to save them. The sight of the two familiar overlords would dissuade all but the most foolish heroic souls. And hell had no place for heroes.

People were already filing into the theater. Spotlights danced, banishing the darkness of night around it. The stage title ‘Jekyll and Hyde’ was prominently written in lights. Vox sighed, looking at the distant glamour of the stage waiting for them. He hesitated by the car door. “Hey, Al.”

“Hm?” The hum was accentuated with an especially thick static filter. Alastor knew that look, Vox was having one of his moods now.

“Was there ever a Dr. Jekyll in you?” The question caught Alastor off guard. He balanced on his cane, tucking one leg over the other. While the programs Vox put out may be shallow and trite, he understood the beauty of these plays. One more reason he made an exception for this man’s company. So he was always happy to have these discussions with him as much as he hated to reveal anything of himself.

“If there was, he was consumed by Hyde long, long ago. So long ago… that I thought the man himself entirely erased once.”

“Thought?” Vox hung on that word. Of course, he would be at least that perceptive. Alastor leaned forward, deciding to throw him a bone.

“Traces… of him have been returning to me these days. He will never reclaim this body of mine, but I do enjoy what it is he awakens.”

Vox finally opened the door. The elk shoved past him, immediately breaking out into a run the moment he saw his chance. Unfortunately, he didn’t get far. This wasn’t Vox’s first rodeo, nor would it be his last. Cords had whipped out in anticipation, winding around his ankle and tripping him. Vox didn’t even look at the sinner, nor pay attention to his cries as he was dragged toward him. The conversation at hand was far more interesting to him at the moment.

The elk’s nails dug at the concrete, tearing up his nails and fingers in the process. The bleating and kicking of his legs only made him look all the more pathetic, invoking a hunger in Alastor. Unaware of his growing hunger, the antlers on his head warped into gnarled branches.

It took all the self-control Alastor could muster to not devour the elk then and there. Running always invoked the predator’s instinct in him.

“Always talking in riddles… I’m surprised. I would think you would have hated anything like a Jekyll in you. I’ve never seen anyone so happy with who they are.” Vox continued speaking as he fulfilled his end of the bargain as if this was all a familiar routine and nothing more. One man butchered in exchange for Alastor taking a car ride.

The first cut was always the most beautiful, in Alastor’s opinion. Each movement was mechanical and emotionless. Vox’s expression neutral even while his claws slashed across the elk's throat in a chillingly mechanical and ruthless motion. He didn't even get a chance to scream. With such confidence in movement, you knew he'd done it hundreds of times before.

Blood sprayed over Vox’s screen, his clothes, dripping down his claws. The inhuman face had not an ounce of pity or euphoria while he butchered a man like he was skinning a rabbit. A chilling contrast to the joy it inspired in Alastor. So similar to one another; yet in some contradiction they were each other's foil.

Alastor had watched plenty of men kill others, he’d murdered countless more. But there was a beauty in Alastor’s eyes to the surgical way Vox’s claws tore through clothes and flesh. Knew the exact place to stick his hand to grab the large intestine and yank it free. The way his claws tore through bone, muscle, sinew, and fat sent a thrilling shiver from head to toe.

But the best part was the almost bored way he looked at Alastor as if asking him if he was satisfied yet. It made his heart pound. He didn’t care how the blood came down his screen in rivulets, collecting at the gaps at the bottom and streaming down the corners. How inhuman and demonic he looked. Pure poetry.

Only Vox could take a kill from him, and bring him more excitement than if he had dealt the blow himself! But he would never admit to the way his heart was clamoring with excitement at these very moments. This was the remnant of Jekyll, no doubt. There was otherwise no other proof that his dead shriveled heart still beat in his chest.

“And what about you my fine fellow? Was there once a Dr. Jekyll for you?” Alastor was always impressed with how he could continue to speak indifferently, even when he felt anything but. An invaluable tool for an Overlord.

Vox shifted his gaze. “What makes you think I’m Hyde right now?” After mangling the corpse to Alastor’s satisfaction, it dropped from his hands with a dull wet thud. Splashing in the pool of blood it left behind. With bloody claws Vox popped open the trunk of his car, throwing off his jacket to fish out a clean one.

It wasn’t his first rodeo.

Black had been traded for burgundy, a good trade as far as Alastor was concerned. Red suited Vox much better. Though he wished Vox could wait a little longer to wipe his claws and face clean. But one could hardly attend a show fresh out of a blood bath. That was better saved for dances.

Vox’s expression turned pensive. “For as long as I can remember, I was always a burden. A selfish brat who only ever cared for himself. If there’s no Jekyll, there’s no Hyde, right? I was… simply born shitty.” It wasn’t self-deprecation a man spoke because he wanted to be reassured. And he’d be asking the wrong man for it anyway.

It was a personal truth, spoken robotically as if one might talk about the weather. But Alastor could tell, in the way his hands hesitated for half a second. This was a piece of himself that he wanted to share with Alastor, as foolish as it was. “So, I spent my entire life convincing everyone I was a Jekyll instead. Became damn good at it too, even convinced myself. Sometimes.”

The trunk boomed as it shut closed. A new jacket was thrown over to cover the bloody sweater beneath. The only hint that he had torn a man open was the little blood splatter lingering on his bow tie. A small touch that Alastor would not dare to rob himself of the pleasure of speaking up.

“But that’s why I’m glad I found you.” Emotion returned to Vox’s voice, gentle and hopeful.

Vox’s cyan teeth were stained in blood as he flashed Alastor a toothy smile that took up half his screen. The very same that became his favorite since the first time he laid eyes on it. Full of those beautiful sharkish teeth that could tear a limb clean off drenched in the blood of a sinner. More beautiful than ever.

“I feel no need to hide my true nature when I’m with you.”

[robobee]

good morning i'm going to nerd out about my location choices in my silly henrydeclan fic because I know a lot of you aren't into games BUT i think the references are fun. note that none of these pictures are mine cause i dont have my game on me atm.

heclan land in a snowed-in backyard. that's a reference to the jacksonville, wyoming sections of the last of us (part 2). there's a snowstorm, too, so the environment is very dreary and foreboding. the interiors are about as decomposed as you'd expect.

(declan's mobile phone battery is at 7%, and goes to 6 as he uses it. that's a giggle to the FNAF style of "survive a week" gameplay)

once they come out on the other side, the weather is markedly different. it's still a/the same suburban area, but now things are looking a lot like the Hillcrest section in TLOU 2, overgrown and humid.

henry mentions that they keep looping back to the other side when they try to take a route that isnt directly down the street. that's because there IS nowhere to go: it's the classic video game thing of inaccessible areas being blocked by a stack of boxes that really SHOULD be jumpable. good old disguised invisible walls.

there's also a mess of cars blocking the path up the street, up to where henry has to specifically aim for inFecTeD breaking through the barriers of cars at the end of the chapter ^

now for the Ominous Looming Structure. henry misidentifies it at first, before amending himself as they get closer. the 'wall', so to speak, "pops in". that's a term referring to when assets just appear/load in out of nowhere as you're looking at them. a well-optimised game will try to avoid this, since it shows a lack of polish + breaks the immersion. if there's a lot of pop-in, it shows either the device running the game or the game itself is flawed severely.

the structure itself takes from silent hill (2 i think, but mostly the vibe of all the games). it's gross brick that's distinctly fleshy and grimy.

the "creepy hallway" is such a cemented trope in horror media that i could say anything from resident evil, to P.T., to the shining and still get the point across. specifically, though, i was referencing the evil within 2 (the right image is from a dark pictures game, you get what i mean when i say its a distinct trope)

they reach what seems to be a regular wall, before declan presses the pattern in a specific way that causes it to swing into another hall. henry does not notice this because he's trying not to have a panic attack. however this puzzle situation is a nod to the OG resident evil, which also has similar décor.

i didn't have a specific reference in mind for the locked door, but i was definitely thinking of some outlast vibes, like so

carrying on from that we are just fully in silent hill territory. just, bona fide nasty. places which look like they'll give you 4 never before seen strains of tetanus.

and we've about caught up to what's written out now! i didn't go too deep into the monsters/lore here, but a specific i want clear is that the whole place is a leyline-induced amalgamation of horror games, with a distinct fondness for the medium. things don't work cohesively, but that's kind of the point: it's a bunch of different properties stitched together.

of the two, henry canonically "watches video game walkthroughs," and declan is declan; so only one of them really has the background to even be able to recognise the patterns in what's going on. also, henry watches these games but he doesn't PLAY these games. he doesn't have that adrenaline/fear frame of reference either.

below i mention some thoughts about the arms used too. thank you for coming on this fun little journey with me! xx

obligatory mention that i barely know anything about g*ns ive never seen a pistol up close unless while getting mugged. BUT since we're going with a shooter game feel, i'll mention my choices for both of them.

i wanted henry to be a stealth/range build to declan's melee/close-range build.

henry uses a revolver with a long barrel and a very shiny finish. Declan uses a double action pistol, smaller for better concealed carry, and matte. probably a glock because i think GLOCK is the funniest word to say since it reminds me of chickens. his is a 9mm i THINK (i did the research but i forgot it so i WANT to say smth with 35, but i dont think that's right), so he's able to acquire ammo easier.

if i was held at gunpoint (lol) to pick a gun for henry, i'd go with a Korth because he would love to spend an obscene amount of money on things. accuracy over speed is the contrast between them: given declan's greywaren insanity i do NOT believe that man is a careful shooter.

if i DIDN'T have to be bound to like, relative realism, I would say Henry has a Mauser c96. it's a very funky looking ww2 era pistol that was very popular in China for a while and the base for Leon Kennedy's Red9 from the resident evil game. EYE think henry is exactly the type of person to have played re4 age 7 and decide to base his personality off of leon. side by sides of both below:

[dangersam]

Hey everyone, it's time for another game update!

But first I just wanted to say a big thanks to all of you for playing the game and sharing your creations. It's great to see so many new players joining the community, it really helps motivate me to keep trying to make the game better!

OK, on to the update.

Soap Box Challenge

See how fast you can get down the hill under gravity alone, no motors allowed. This new scenario gives you an idea of the kind of "mini games" possible with Lua scripting, but it still barely scratches the surface really, hopefully we can push the boundaries of this more in the future. Anyway, check it out and let me know what you think.

New Parts

Continuous servo motors, more crown, rack, & worm gear sizes, more "hole & plate" connectors, and round ended beams.

Part Behaviours

Separate servo forward & reverse angles, flip pulley belts, link displays to multiple parts, etc.

Here's a quick look at some of these changes:

Release notes:-

New Soap Box Challenge scenario.

New parts:-

Small and medium continuous servo motors.

24T and 40T Hi & Lo crown gears.

x3 rack gear.

x1 worm gear.

More "1-Hole Plate" and "2-Hole Plate" resizable connectors.

Rounded and half rounded resizable beams.

Part behaviour improvements:-

Servo motor part behaviour now has separately tweakable forward and reverse angles.

Servo and stepper motor part behaviours now have an "angular speed" data channel.

Pulley part behaviour now has an option to flip belt routing.

Displays can now be linked to multiple other parts.

Motor, battery, and rotor parts can now attach to each other, and to other parts in a more consistent way.

Changed plate on "plate axle" connector part to be circular.

Tweaked material strength of all wheels.

Added buttons to UI screens to open containing folder in Windows Explorer.

Added player "free flight movement mode" setting to allow for moving horizontally rather than along the view direction.

Added settings to the controls options screen for disabling each of the manipulators.

Improved crosshair.

Added Hungarian translations to currently localised strings, thanks to BlueGoldFlag.

Bug fixes.

Upgraded to Unity 2021.3.33.

[coutelier]

Thing in the Woods

Excerpt from Irongate:

Kaya was tired. Too tired to spend the rest of the night dealing with Angela, and she was sure Sayuri would find some other girl to have fun with. For Kaya she was heading back to Greenback to rest as she had done for the last several nights. She was tired a lot lately.

She’d seen the lightning, felt the thunder, droplets starting to fall as she set the seat in Greenback as far back as she could to settle as much as she could. To her left were lightless mostly empty warehouses, and to her right an inky valley, trees atop the most distant hills swaying as if performing a dance to their god, the only sound the pitter-patter of rain. Until the scream. Kaya was used to hearing screams; if not Angela’s singing, then usually it was drunks shouting and brawling. But this was more anguished, desperate, and cut off so abruptly. And it was close.

It was no warmer in the car than out there, where Kaya flitted her gaze for anything out of the ordinary. Streetlights - shouldn’t at least some streetlights have been on? Only now did she notice the complete lack of any power in the neighborhood. And shoes - behind a ‘to let’ sign hammered into turf there was definitely a foot poking. Could someone have fallen? She couldn’t really see from where, but hugging herself for warmth she stepped out of Greenback to where the injured person was laying.

“Hey?” Kaya cooed, the raindrops splashing on her, her denim outfit quickly getting heavy, “are you okay?” She craned her neck to see around the sign. The man looked like he was sleeping, or lying on his back staring up at the sky. Both things were impossible. Kaya stepped back, skin paling as something rose in her throat - the man was really, really not okay, although at least he was past worrying about it. Kaya couldn’t remember running back to Greenback or for how long she sat frozen at the wheel. She looked straight ahead into the murky night but all she saw were those eyes, or rather the ichor oozing holes where eyes should have been. It was certainly a while before she could form any more coherent thought than ‘shit’.

Call someone. Who? Dibbles? That made sense. But the phone… she was she’d charged it, yet all she saw was her own white and red reflection. Pressing it harder didn’t transfer any energy into the device. It was dead - don’t think the word dead! Did she have a spare battery? Maybe… she was going to need her flashlight from the glove box to search all the shoeboxes in the car with her, but that was… taking a power nap as well. Great.

Another thought - it hadn’t been that long between hearing the scream and finding the man, which meant the eye-gouger could still be… perhaps the best thing to do was just to stay very still.

The rain grew heavier, beating down more rapidly. Kaya had been alert after the scream, but now her eyes were wide taking in everything. The rain obscured a lot, but also revealed something she might not have seen. In her mirror she saw up in the branches behind her an outline begin to form. It became like a melting ice sculpture of a man crouching in, completely still, until it opened its eyes and looked back at her.

Staying still was a dumb idea. Now was definitely, definitely time to go. But Greenback seemed asleep - she kept turning the key in the ignition again and again but just nothing. Between turns she kept glancing in the mirror to see what that thing was doing. For the first three turns it was just looking, then on the fourth it vanished. Kaya searched for it while turning the key a fifth time, and then it was at her window. It had dropped whatever cloak it had been hiding with so now she could see it was a gray-brown androgynous humanoid covered in chitinous armor. The armor had a texture like tree back, leaf-like ears protruding either side of the mouthless helm. It scrutinized her then reached down getting one hand under Greenback’s door, then flipped the entire vehicle over.

Kaya braced herself as best she could as the world spun before her, her own shoeboxes flying and hitting her from all directions. She gritted and waited until with a jolt gravity was firmly beneath her again. She had rolled down the hill and come to rest on another part of the road that winded down. What’s more, Greenback’s nose was facing down the slope - this was good. Both she and the car were battered, but now she could release the handbrake, Greenback slowly trundling forward as she kept trying to start the engine. Just one spark - that was all that was needed. But then a dull metallic thud drew her eyes from the ignition to those of the creature now kneeling on the hood.

It pulled its arm back, about to punch through the windshield, when Greenback finally awoke with a roar. Kaya screeched in triumph, slamming him into reverse, the creature falling backwards, somersaulting in mid-air to land on its feet. But now it was in the middle of the road in Kaya’s sights and she was way past shock and terror now. Now she was just pissed off.

Greenback’s tires squealed, rubber burning before he was launched at the target. The creature in its armor showed no emotion, but was fast, leaping over the car like an acrobat leaping over a charging bull.

Now she was moving Kaya kept her foot down not caring where she was going - just away. After a moment she noticed the roadsigns telling her that she was heading out into open country. That likely wasn’t the smartest thing - she should be heading into town where there were people. Before Kaya could turn them around another thud and the roof crumpled slightly as Greenback shook - Kaya suspected they had picked up a passenger. A suspicion confirmed when a blade punched threw the roof narrowly missing her.

Trees and fences kept kept whizzing by, Greenback’s tires screeching as he swerved side to side, Kaya doing her best to keep him on the road while avoiding the creature’s blade; if she couldn’t shake it off it would soon get her but the damn thing held on tight. With a heavy heart Kaya saw only one way out, patting Greenback’s dashboard while making sure her seatbelt was done up. “Forgive me buddy,” she said. If she couldn’t shake the thing, she was going to crush it.

White striped whizzed by. Just as the blade came down again Kaya spun the wheel, Greenback squealing as he fell on his side, white hot sparks from the tarmac as he slid then flipped and rolled, smashed glass and agonized twisting metal as he bounced off the road through. That was when Kaya passed out.

When she came around the world was upside down. It was cool. The rain had stopped. There were a couple of cows grazing on the far side of the field, completely unbothered by what was going on where she was. Kaya’s head was ringing. Blood rushing to it likely didn’t help. She pushed open the door and unbuckled herself, falling onto the broken glass and junk scattered below adding more to the cuts and scrapes. As she was trying to wriggle out she yelped, hand recoiling from something warm and very sharp - the creature’s blade. At least a piece of it seemed to have broken off. Also seemed a good idea to take it, so after putting on some gloves she carefully slipped it into her jacket.

Once outside she grunted, bones and muscles creaking and aching as she forced herself to her feet. Greenback however wasn’t getting back up anytime soon. If there was a way to get him she would, but the fact was he wasn’t supposed to have been on the road in the first. He was a reject, like her, and once the cops found him he’d be impounded and likely scrapped. Wasn’t a lot Kaya could do about that - she had to get away from here. She patted him, thanked him for his service, then staggered toward the road while loosening her shoulders. With the blades nearly touching she froze; of course the monster was behind her.

Gritting her jaw Kaya spun about, fist and red pony tails flying. The creature swatted her arm aside and kicked, Kaya doubling over with a whoomph. It kicked like a horse, sending her sprawling into the wet glass, its twisted limbs popping back into place as it advanced on her. Kaya rolled to her belly, trying to crawl away only to be lifted to her knees by one of her tails. The creature stepped around to the front of her; it had no face to emote with, but it nevertheless seemed confident she was under its control and was taking its time to finish her.

But Kaya struck, wedging the blade she’d found into a gap between the plates covering the creature’s upper and lower arms. At least it must have felt pain as it let her go, staggering back. Spurred on Kaya launched her shoulder into its torsos, tackling the creature and screaming as she stabbed again and again at any gap she could find in the armor. Kaya had to find a way to kill it before it remembered its strength. The eye - go for the eye!

It let out a harrowing howl as the blade slid through the socket into, presumably, its brain. Then it was still. Kaya rolled off it to lie on her back, panting, aching. The wet grass was cool and refreshing, but she couldn’t stay. Something else must heard the howl. Best she wasn’t here when they came to investigate.

[whumpster-fire]

Some people in the notes aren't getting it so:

The idea as described in the OP is a perpetual motion machine and doesn't work because no conversion of energy is 100% efficient. Batteries, motors, and wires all "waste" some of the energy you put into them, so any "run a thing off itself" system will still lose energy, not to mention the energy losses a car naturally has to overcome from actually driving, e.g. rolling resistance of tires, aerodynamic drag, any power needed to run AC/heating, headlights, windshield wipers, etc. It doesn't work for the same reason that if you plug a light bulb into a solar panel and put it in a box lined with mirrors you can't get infinite light, or why we can't make wind turbines generate power on days with no wind by just pointing a giant electric fan at them.

The basic concept of "Use energy from the car's motion to recharge the batteries" is regenerative braking. This is a known, proven technology THAT IS ALREADY STANDARD IN THE CHEVY VOLT AND MOST OTHER ELECTRIC CARS, and it doesn't need an extra generator because electric motors are already capable of acting as generators if you put mechanical power into them.

Regenerative braking is not perpetual motion, but it can make an electric vehicle significantly more efficient in conditions where it's starting or stopping repeatedly or going up and down hills where it needs to control its speed on the downhill sections by braking, because every time you stop the vehicle or descend a hill it gives you back a decent percentage of the energy you used to accelerate / to climb the hill, whereas a combustion-powered vehicle, even one that's using engine braking, is getting back approximately 0%. Even if it's powering the alternator from the car's motion, that'll give "free" power for the next time the engine's started or running the electronics but it can't use the generated electricity to get itself back up to speed after stopping at a traffic light. It doesn't work just cruising at constant speed: if you had one motor applying power and another trying to do regen braking simultaneously you'd just end up wasting energy.

You actually can supply all the energy a vehicle needs with regenerative braking, but only in the very specific use case of transporting heavy cargo down a hill, offloading it, and driving back up empty and much lighter. This isn't much use for cars, but it is a thing for some heavy mine/quarry haul trucks. This is still not a perpetual motion machine: it's using the gravitational potential energy of thousands of tons of rock and ore at the top of a mountain as an external energy source.

[reddocsailor]

01 Down the rabbit hole - The Begin of a journey I

By Docsailor 2023

Here is me, somewhere in the middle of nowhere. My car broke down, no life sign around, no cell phone coverage, lovely that’s how I liked it.

I am leaning to my car, staring at the sun, which is dropping slowly behind the hills.

My hand moves through my ginger hair which is cascading down my back in a wavy style. I am sighing out load "What a fuck!!". Yeah, not lady like but who cares anyway.

I finished my business trip a couple of hours ago and had some time off. This time I wanted to spent cruising around, get in contact with the country, people….

So nobody would miss me for a couple of weeks "Great". "Yeah spare your holiday of a whole year and take it in a row" I am speaking out load. "Not as planned you…" holding on " Why I am yelling nobody around…"

I am kicking the tyre " Autsch", luckily I switched my heels to the sneakers, but it still hurts.

"Come on you are an engineer, you can fix a car" I inhale deeply trying to calm myself down. My hands brush down my lovely Scottish skirt, I like the texture of it. I am looking down on myself.

My white blouse, still my black bra on, give my C Cup breasts a lovely shape and then my Scottish skirt in which I jumped after the business was done. I like to travel with it.

I begin to smile "Yeah I am looking like a schoolgirl, besides that I am forty…"

Anyway let’s have a look at this bloody rental car. "What does this message say "Error in electrical drive unit"

Damm I am a mechanical engineer. Ok what does my electrical engineer say about drive units "Sometimes they need to reset" Honestly why I have taken a hybrid. " Oh yes be bold, be brave try something new…." Ok I have checked the manual which says call the service, which is quite of tricky when you are in the middle of nowhere. So reset the drive unit, I could kill the connection to the battery, let’s give it a shot. I open up the engine cover, great has this car some tools a wrench would be lovely. So, I go to the trunk throwing my stuff to the back seats, no, no tool box…. Hold on my Leatherman, … In my backpack for hiking… is it a good idea, give it a shot. So, unfold the pliers. Grab the nut and give it a turn…" Arrrrggghh God Damm it that hurts…"I look at my right hand, its bleeding, I slipped an smashed my hand at the engine. "Told you"

So I make myself a bandage on my hand and sit down on the open trunk.

Frustrated I grab myself something to eat from my hiking backpack.

"So here I am, in this bloody hill forest in the middle of nowhere…. No cell phone coverage … broken down car and a scratched hand because of foolishness….." yelling out loud of frustration.

Ok I have my hiking stuff with me, so here is the plan, leave the car, leave a message and then do some miles. So I switch my cloth from casual to hiking. My spandex purple hiking leggings, my hiking shirt and my jacket, and on my hiking shoes. Message left check, car locked check and off I go.

I am humming to myself " And I would walk 500 miles…" as I start my walk down the road.

The sun is dropping down and then I hear it in the far distance a roaring of a high-powered car. There in the distance a red car, the roaring increases.

"Great in the middle of nowhere a single women and the only car is probably a muscle car. Well you wanted to get in touch….. " Sighing

It is indeed a muscle car, Ford Mustang. As it comes closer it slows down and halts right next to me. The side windows opens. "Hi Dear, your car broke down 3,5miles " a friendly women at my age with a colourful hair job asks me.

"Yeah kind off you know Hybrids…" me responding.

"You should not trust the new stuff, luckily I find your car and you, I am Catherine shall I give you a lift to my place, until we find a somebody to fix it".

"That would be lovely. I am Angelique “.

"Angelique what a lovely name. Drop your stuff in the trunk and tug yourself in" I move my backpack in the trunk and then I slide myself into the passenger seat.

“A 5-point belt?”

"You know I like speeding."

"Sure, you do with a car like this."

"You need a hand?"

"No thanks." and then she accelerates like the Devil is chasing her.

"Woaw "

"Yeah I like the vibrations and of course the speeding"

"That’s for sure…"

And we are speeding down the road….

The sun starts to disappear behind the horizon. And we start to chat.

"You are not from here, aren´t you Angelique?"

"No, I had been on a business trip and now I have some days off."

"What are you doing for business?"

"Well I am engineer and have done a Factory Acceptance Test on one of our suppliers the last weeks."

"So you have been long away from home"

"Yeah, kind off"

"Nobody missing you back at home."

“It is complicated. That why I wanted to travel a bit. Until the car broke down”.

“Luckily I find you first, you could be a sweet target”

"Hold on, no I am not a prey I can be pretty bad ass"

"A prey, that is an interesting saying" Catherine is giving me a strange look, mustering me.

"Luckily I have picked you up, and as a female engineer who is running factory acceptance tests I bet you have your abilities to earn your ranks." she is smiling at me.

I look back at her, started scanning her. Well she is probably my age, but her hair style is probably not typical for her age. It starts jet black, starting straight her neck down, getting purple and wavy and the ends fire orange. That’s a hairstyle. She is shorter than me, she got a fitting cleavage to her frame. A cleavage I would like to have. Then I see for the first time she is wearing a corset, leather? Yeah, leather her skirt is shiny leather, of course black stockings and she is driving in heels, very high heels. She is recognizing that I scan her.

"Why is prey wrong to say, what should I say a target? Anyway, what is your business, Catherine." Trying to disguise my scan.

"Oh, you like to change topics. I am the CFO of our family business" With a harsh turn she is leaving the main road down in the forest.

"So, you are probably coming or heading to a party, I assume."

"A party, no my Dear, it is not my vanilla style I usually wear at office and luckily I can leave the vanilla style for a little bit thanks to Home Office" She breaks quite harsh.

"There we are, welcome to my place".

I have seen a lot of places, but this my jaw drops down.

"Your place,……and that of a…"

"Yeah, my place…"

" That is a mansion, no hold on how… big"

"Come in the weather is going to change" The trunk opens automatically. I am still turning my head slowly from left to right. "And you living her with…."

"Alone, come on the weather" she rushes me.

I realize the wind had freshened up quite a bit and dark clouds are moving over the hills.

I grab my backpack and follow her. She opens the door, and I am standing in a hall. Two stairs a leading upward in 2 wings, in the centre there is a doorway which leads further into the house.

"Yeah Daddy had paid very well for this" I mumble to myself.

"Come on before you get lost and find something you might like." I nearly stumble forward as I pass the big C which is been laid in the floor.

"Might like…?" puzzled response. But the clicking of the heels might over tune my words. I have to pay my respect to Cathrine speed on her 10" heels, I would not be able to walk that fast in heels.

"So who is Mr. Cathrine? "

"There is none, I life her by myself, but I have guests if I want. Or I take up a prey" Cathrine turns around and give me a smirking smile "Sorry I like your saying"

"Prey? Just because I mentioned it in the car"

"You offer me a picture, which I somehow like."

"I offered a picture? Honestly."

"I am not vanilla in my house" she cuts me off.

"House, it is more a mansion, residence or something but definitely not a house. Vanila?"

"Dear lets get you sorted. Please be my guest until we manage something with your car" she had stopped right in front a door. With an elegant move she opens the door behind her back with her right arm and steps backwards in gesturing to follow her.

"Make yourself comfortable, shall I pick you in 45min to have dinner together"

"Wow, thank you for your hospitality, you are really generous. I know it is Friday and to be honest it is in the middle of nowhere her, so thank you."

"With pleasure my dear, maybe I will ask for an compensation, maybe, depending on which side of the coin I am." giving me a friendly smile and turns on her heels.

"I will also change in something more appealing."

"Appealing is there a dress code for the dinner?"

"It´s dinner dear, there is always a dress code"

"So no yoga pants than, for being comfortable?”

"Do what you like my dear" as she moves elegant around a corner. The clicking of her heels still echoing.

I through my backpack on a chair. Sighing out loud. "What a day, what a day. So let’s get a shower then and then find something suitable for the dinner".

[aawestautomotive]

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[bookmychardhamyatra]

Advice on Packing and Preparing for the Char Dham Yatra Package Tour

Kedarnath, Badrinath, Gangotri, and Yamunotri, are the four Chardham shrines of Devbhoomi, and they are all situated at elevations of more than 3,000 meters above the level of the sea. Pack plenty of warm winter apparel, including coats, sweaters, thermal underwear, socks, and mufflers. Even though the day may appear nice, after the sun sets, it becomes quite windy and chilly. Additionally, the weather at the high elevations of the Garhwal Himalayas for the Char Dham Yatra Package Tour is unforeseeable. Therefore, you need to carry things to handle the situation.

Things to Carry on Your Char Dham Yatra to Combat Weather

The pilgrims will be warm and comfortable if they carry a windcheater, which is the best method to combat the chilly air and stinging wind.

It may rain at any time along the whole Chardham Yatra path due to the highly unpredictable environment. It is highly recommended that pilgrims bring raincoats and umbrellas with them on their journey.

The pilgrims ought to bring an additional pair of stockings and water-resistant footwear for the yatra for further protection.

The pilgrims should also bring hats, a pair of sunglasses, and sunblock, among other necessities. Particularly in these high-altitude areas, the pilgrims require complete shielding from the sun's harsh rays.

People should always remember to bring mufflers and monkey hats to protect their heads from the chilly winds that regularly sweep across the hills throughout the summer.

Stay Physically Active Before Char Dham Yatra

High-altitude terrain presents a number of difficulties that people must be properly equipped to handle. The pilgrims must be in good physical shape because the site is nearly 3,000 meters above sea level. Before starting their trip, yatris need to sufficiently prepare for the treks; this may be done by engaging in a 20-minute daily training routine. You ought to include walking, running, and racing in your preparation for the trek.

The Chardham pilgrimage requires good physical condition, mostly because of the temples' difficult terrain. Both pilgrims traveling by helicopter and by car should do this.

Things to Carry for Medical Emergency

Bring a medical box with all of the necessary medications for the trip, such as pain relievers, anti-diarrhea, and anti-fever drugs.

No matter how well you get ready, the Chardham Yatra may be extremely mentally and physically taxing. To reenergize yourself, pack chocolate, energy bars, almonds, and other dry fruits.

If you want to explore the Dhams, make sure to carry a bottle of water.

Things Should Be Avoided

Elder people, babies, and pregnant women must not visit the Chardham Yatra.

Sarees should not be worn throughout the yatra, as the clothing may make walking difficult and unpleasant. To make your trip comfortable, make sure to bring a salwar kameez or a set of track pants with a pair of sneakers.

Some Must-Haves to Carry and Follow

You should also carry flashlights, torches with rechargeable batteries, and a power bank device.

Every Yatri is required to register. This is done to keep track of the number of pilgrims and ensure their safety. This is a required process that may be completed online or in person in some locations, including Rishikesh.

Yatris are required to have a copy of their immunization record and a negative COVID-19 RTPCR test that is no more than two to three days old as a safeguard.

Conclusion With this blog, we hope, you get all the information regarding your Luxury Chardham Yatra Package tour so that you can experience Char Dham Yatra effortlessly.

[memynissanandi]

Nissan Navara Bakkie Is The Perfect Blend Of Business And Pleasure

While age may be catching up with fans of authentic hardcore trucks, it does not mean they could no longer enjoy long drives. There’s the versatile bakkie that possesses long-travel off-road suspension that smoothens any ride — the Nissan Navara.

So whether they’re off to an out-of-town business trip or simply want to scratch their adventure itch across challenging terrains, the Nissan Navara is a reliable choice for those who require a vehicle for both work and play. Take a look at everything you get for the Nissan Navara price - you’ll see it’s well worth it.

Its multi-functionality does not stop there. The Nissan Navara boasts features that make it the perfect business partner for someone who wants a versatile workhorse. With its fully boxed ladder frame — unlike some three-sided frames — the Nissan Navara would not twist over uneven terrain. The aforementioned 5-link rear suspension also provides a comfortable ride, even to those seated at the back. Thrive with full power in every performance with a 2.5-litre turbo diesel engine that boasts up to 141.683 kilowatts and 450 Nm of torque, paired to a 7-speed automatic transmission.

On top of the specs is its 1-ton payload capacity, Nissan Navara is a hulk of mobility that does not bend on an adventure. Its Utili-Track™ Cargo System has two channels running the length of the pick-up bed, plus four heavy-duty cleats that let you position stable tie-down points practically anywhere. Its new integrated bumper step, meanwhile, gives you easy access.

Those calling shotgun will be delighted with Zero Gravity front seats, inspired by the weightless posture of astronauts in space. The front seats provide generous support to help reduce fatigue. People in the back will also experience a smoother ride, thanks to the rear seats with comfortable springs and high-bumping urethane foam pads. All in all, the quieter cabin makes those long drives feel short.

The Nissan Navara also has convenient amenities and cutting-edge technology for better comfort and confidence in driving. A case in point is the 20.32 cm Advanced Touch screen Display Audio, a capacitive screen comparable to the sizes of other display audios of top pick-up trucks. It offers a more heightened usability of Nissan Intelligent Mobility features so that users can see and do more.

Entrepreneurs and professionals-on-the go will also enjoy seamless connectivity with Apple Car Play for iPhone users and Android Auto for Android phone users. Drivers can even customize the 20.32 cm Advanced Touch screen Display Audio, as easily as tweaking their tablets. Losing battery for your gadgets? The Nissan Navara got you covered with a state-of-the-art USB port for rapid charging.

Make no mistake, this brute also carries intelligence on the road. The Navara’s Nissan Intelligent Mobility (NIM) features that include the Intelligent Around View Monitor. On rough terrain, the Intelligent Around View Monitor becomes your personal spotter. With a designated off-road mode that activates at slow speeds in 4 LO, it gives you a clear view of the surrounding terrain. This helps you see exactly where to drive your front wheels.

Other Nissan technology includes Rear Cross Traffic Alert, Lane Departure Warning, Blind spot warning, Intelligent Forward Collision Warning, Intelligent Emergency Braking, Off-Road Monito, Hill Descendent Control, and Hill Start Assist. Trust the tech and feel free to climb, crawl, and conquer with the Nissan Navara.

While the Nissan Navara may give you a sense of heart-pounding action, you do not have to worry about skyrocketing prices of repairs. Be protected longer from unexpected fixes with Nissan Navara’s 5-year or 150,000 kilometre-warranty.

So start a brave new ride. Hit the beach. Climb a mountain. Cross a rocky stream. Intersecting the demands of business and pleasure, the Nissan Navara is a versatile pick-up truck that will give you a good mix of rugged capability, comfort, and modern technology

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Article sourced from: http://www.cnnphilippines.com/

[2023cars]

What Variant of Kushaq is Good to Buy?

The Skoda Kushaq features an opulent design, plush comfort, and performance that pushes you to new heights, and available with PPS Skoda Dealer Hyderabad. Drive this mid-sized SUV through its trip as we discuss why it offers the best value on the Indian market. Based on the customized MQB A0 IN platform, the Kushaq was the first Skoda vehicle to be introduced in India as part of the India 2.0 program.

The Skoda Kushaq comes in options of 1.5-liter and 1.0-liter turbocharge gasoline engines. A 6-speed manual is available for both engines. The smaller engine gets a 6-speed torque converter automatic while the bigger engine incorporates a 7-speed dual-clutch automatic transmission. Skoda Kushaq offers three variants as Active, Ambition, and Style. Based on the highest-end Style version, the Monte Carlo edition was created.

With a 1.5 litre TSI engine that meets the highest standards for driving enjoyment and dynamics, it stands out among models in its class. One of the important characteristics is the DSG transmission, which is often referred to as a multi-collision braking system or an electronic brake force distribution system.

Its measurements are 4225 mm in length, 1,760 mm in width, 1,612 mm in height, and 2651 mm for the wheelbase.

Different Variants of Skoda Kushaq

PPS Skoda Dealers Hyderabad provides the Skoda Kushaq in 16 different variants. The Skoda Kushaq Monte Carlo DSG is the Skoda Kushaq Best Variant, whereas the base model of Kushaq is the 1.0 TSI Active (1.5 TSI). It comes in five appealing colours: Tornado Red, Candy White, Brilliant Silver, Carbon Steel, and Honey Orange.

Features of the Skoda Kushaq

A 10-inch touchscreen infotainment system with Apple CarPlay, an electric sunroof, Android Auto, wireless charging, a two-spoke steering wheel, cruise control, ventilated front seats, ambient lighting, and a cooled glove box are available in the Skoda Kushaq. As the segment leader with the longest wheelbase, it offers the most space for the occupants. Skoda Kushaq takes care of the safety of the driver and passengers as the first priority.

It offers important accessories including front and rear head restraints that can be adjusted in height, 16-inch alloy wheels, a three-point seatbelt, two outer three-point seatbelts, a centre lap belt in the back, an ISOFIX, a door open indicator. Additionally, the top "Style" trim level has side and curtain airbags that deploy in an emergency. In this section, you should look at the tyre pressure monitor and the hill start assistance.

A four years/1,000,000 km warranty is included with it, and it can be extended up to six years/1,50,000 km. Additionally, Skoda provides a six-year corrosion warranty, a three-year paint warranty, a two-year battery warranty, a two-year components warranty, and extended roadside assistance packages for up to nine years. Get additional discounts and services from Authorized Skoda Dealers Hyderabad.

Is Skoda Kushaq value for money?

Most individuals have a question when buying a car, especially when choosing a certain model. As long as you acquire the desired variant, there is no reason not to drive home this beauty. With the TSI turbo petrol engines, the optimum driving comfort enables the driver seat to roll out effortlessly. The beautiful appearance of this SUV model with a contemporary design is deserving when compared to the Skoda Kushaq Vs Creta or its other rivals, such as the Kia Seltos.

During any accident, the multi-collision brake helps to avoid more collisions. This car in the segment that is worth buying is promoted by these essential attributes when comparing Kushaq Ambition Vs Style. The feature-rich interior exudes elegance that matches the exterior's appearance. Six speakers, a 7-inch touchscreen, height-adjustable headrests for all seats, armrests on the centre console and all doors, and a 2-spoke steering wheel with height and length adjustments are included in all base variants of this contemporary vehicle. Additional features are available in the mid and top variants.

Does Skoda Kushaq Ambition have sunroof?

No. The Skoda Kushaq Ambition lacks a sunroof. Speaking about the Skoda Kushaq Variants Comparision, the sunroof option is available in selected models of Skoda Kushaq - Monte Carlo 1.5L TSI DSG, Style 1.5L TSI DSG Anniversary Style 1.5L TSI DSG (6 Airbags),  Monte Carlo 1.5L TSI MT, Monte Carlo 1.0 TSI AT, Style 1.5L TSI DSG, Style 1.5L TSI MT, Style 1.5L TSI MT Anniversary, Style 1.0L TSI AT Anniversary, Style 1.0L TSI AT (6 Airbags), Monte Carlo 1.0L TSI MT, Style 1.0L TSI AT, Style 1.0L TSI MT, and Style 1.0L TSI MT Anniversary.

Is Skoda Kushaq good for long drive?

The Kushaq offers a smooth ride and protects its occupants from any road jolts thanks to its well-designed wheels and excellent suspension. Because of the power and torque, you can let loose the beast on the highway. The car handles amazingly well and keeps its poise at lower speeds on city streets as well. Three people can be placed in the rear with the utmost comfort thanks to the generous legroom between the back seat and the front seat.

Is Skoda maintenance costly?

Skoda automobiles have a history of having high maintenance costs. But over the last few years, things have altered. Significant improvements have been made to the upkeep of the service centres. They now have fairly open billing practices, and you can check the cost of parts on the Skoda website. They also have an app that makes it easy to schedule service appointments.

Conclusion

Skoda Kushaq is without a doubt the top pick in the mid-size SUV sector when considering features and cost. Nobody can avoid buying this model in this market sector because of its exceptional quality and riding pleasure. The best advice is to schedule a test drive at the PPS Skoda Showroom Hyderabad for a real-world, superior experience and also to find Skoda Kushaq Variant On Road Price. Simple, intelligent selections like the Skoda Kushaq don't require much consideration when making a buying decision, but the desired variation must be carefully chosen. Select the Monte Carlo version if it best suits your needs now.

[walkshade]

i had a dream last night that my family went on a vacation but not to anywhere specific. i think it was france at once point. i tried to let a pigeon out of my room and it was too much of a cat to fly away. my little sister was in california but also on the trip with us. i gave away a cereal box full of skittles to my older sibling but not before taking out the prize in the box, which was a battery powered radio. you could speak into it, and when my little sister tried to speak into it she forgot to tune it into a station. my dad drove us into somewhere rural. it was a valley that had a big patch of pebbles and the edges were smoking and steaming. i suggested it was sulfur gas, my dad said maybe and drove us through anyways. i noticed hot tar and the car slipped over the gravel trying to get up a hill. i thought it was lucky we had a radio to get help.

[all-things-fic]

Somewhere Only We Know

A/N - Hello, you lovely lot! Hope you are all keeping well in these utterly shit Covid times. Who would’ve thought that we would still be here in December?! Please see my offering for @goldenbluesuit​‘s Christmas Fic Challenge. Hope I’ve done a bit of justice with this piece.

I can remember Katie texting me telling me about the challenge, and I’ll admit I was given first dibs and now I’m absolutely shitting myself because I’ve seen all the brillaint entries so far and I’m not sure I really cut the mustard with this piece but I’m proud of myself for being able to put a solid 70% of this together in just one day (that one day being today).

Anyway, I hope you enjoy! Katie has done a brilliant job and I know how grateful she is towards anyone who has joined the challenge or supported by reading/sharing etc.... I need to stop rambling... Okay, thank you for sticking with me as always and happy reading! .x

***

The last thing you remembered actually reading in the group chat was “make sure you have your wellies”. You were glad that you remembered that part at the very least.

Winds whipped around you as you buried your face further into your cream roll neck cable knit jumper, all but hidden underneath your tobacco borg teddy coat that someone had already likened to Macklemore.

Nothing like being back home with your closest and oldest friends.

Mud squelched under your feet as you walked in line with two of your oldest girl friends, eyes looking over the four males in front of you as they led the way over the grassy hills.

There had been zero planning on what today’s events would bring. It was quite clear that the seven of you just wanted to be reunited with the country air and wind bitten cheeks.

It was nice. How simple it was. On the surface at the very least. That was until you zoned in on the little things. 

Like his laugh. The same laugh that always carried somehow and it seemed like the wind was making it that much more prominent than usual today.

There was no denying, he had this glow about him. Even from the back of him. You felt silly for thinking it, but it was true. It was in the way he held himself as he attacked the grassy hills with his feet clad wellies and brown trousers.

Life had changed a lot in over a decade. Christ, had it been that long? You’d all gone from baby teenagers to fully fledged adults. The age range of your friendship differing slightly, the odd person here and there slightly older than a couple of people in the group.

Nonetheless, many of the experiences had been the same. The big job offers, and the even bigger promotions. The heartbreaks, regardless of their prominence or lack of, had been the felt the same. The flirtation between some of you sparked probably a bit more so now with a finesse that didn’t have you rolling your eyes but rather leaning into it. 

Four out of seven of you were single. Jack and Jonny were virtually married off, however neither of them were with their partners this year with both deciding to spend Christmas at home and New Years with their significant others. Alice was still loved up and going strong with her fella, as was Grace who you hadn’t heard a peep from as she constantly checked her phone to see when the person she was besotted with finally arrived up North thanks to West Midlands Trains pulling into Crewe. 

So that left Will, you and Harry. Harry who had  quite publicly made it known that he was single. Well, according to your Mum he had, in several interviews. Including the one that she had described as an ‘incredibly relaxing watch and nice background noise to my Sunday evening brew and ironing session’. 

That was a strange one for you, his honesty. In earlier years of friendship, he always seemed quite aloof. Like he was keeping his options open. Guarded in a way that frustrated at least 75% of the friendship group, in the nicest way possible. You knew that was a contradiction but any annoyance came from a good place. 

You remembered one night in 2014 when he wouldn’t quite give you a straight answer over tequila shots whether he was shagging someone or not. You also remember the way he’d been pulled away from you tactfully by Alice that night when she sensed how you were about to blow up at his lackadaisical attitude. 

The same had been felt in 2016. Not so much in 2018, but you weren’t single then so maybe you just didn’t care. 

2019 was significantly different though.

See the thing was, you knew him now. Like, knew knew him. 

Some would think it was a lapse of judgment, a reading that you would agree upon given what had happened two days prior if ever prodded about it publicly.

Others would vehemently disagree. Stating how long any sort of energy between the two of you had been bubbling for a number of years. 

Looking back you couldn’t even understand why you’d attended his show. You lived in Camden and it made sense, but that’s where the sense stopped. Even the ways he had reached out had been one of the most random messages you’d received from him

There was no context, just a simple ‘I’m playing the Electric Ballroom and there’s tickets waiting for you if you want ‘em.’

And the thing was, you loved that venue. The grungy-ness of it all. The way you had stuck to the floor while trying to dance along to the likes of The Hives and Kings of Leon when seeing them playing there, basking in your sweaty happiness. 

But the stickiness of the floor and sweatiness of the room didn’t compare to the stickiness and sweatiness you later found yourself partaking in as Harry took you from behind over the side of his couch. 

A shiver rolled through you at the thought, one that you would blame on the December bitter chill because it was a secret. One that neither of you had mentioned since it happened on Thursday night, or to be technically correct the early hours of Friday morning. 

He’d been good. Of course he had been.

He had that way about him that night that pulled you under a false sense of endeared security. From his dimpled smile to gleaming eyes. He was happy. 

And the way he had shone as he found you on the balcony had warmed you like nothing you had known in the longest time.

It caused you to forget about the worry that had laden you limbs as you turned up at 9.13pm to the wooden doors of the building, wondering how many songs he was in to the set as you convinced yourself he would start at 9.00pm.

As you’d been ushered over to a clear box window and uttered your name to a dorky looking man wearing a tracksuit pull over and watched him handover a white envelope through the circle hatch. 

You stood in the dark, next to two much younger girls who enjoyed the way his glances lingered over at their side. Eyes had found Gemma in the opposite corner of the balcony, her dancing and singing with some recognisable faces mainly more so because you had seen them on social media.

You, however, kept yourself to yourself. Until you were anchored in the tightest hug from Gemma that you had ever felt from her and swayed from side to side as she made it known how pleased she was to see you once the concert was over. 

That familiarity had been nice. The vibrancy of nostalgia consuming you in your entirety. 

Watching him work a room when he finally entered the after party was a sight to behold, in his navy blue pinstripe suit and yellow ‘I’m gonna die lonely’ t-shirt. 

He wasn’t. Gonna die lonely, that is. 

He glided so smoothly from one person to the next, spilling a drink down himself in the process you’d seen (and later felt when your hand clung to the fabric of his t-shirt as you kissed), making time for everyone in his own unique way.

Big eyes followed you over Gemma’s shoulder when he had finally found himself within your circle and hugged his sister once more that evening. They were hard to read but also openly filled with a glimmer of hope as he dropped his gaze to see what you were wearing.

And when he approached you, he hugged you in a way that managed to pull you into the darkened corner of the dingy space. Spinning your body to keep your face concealed from any prying eyes. 

He revealed to you how he didn’t think you were going to turn up, scanning you with his gaze as he spoke. You did the same, a bit taken aback by just how attractive you were finding him. He had always been handsome but the aura he gave off, made your fingers itch to have him closer to you. 

Words ran away from you that night as he begged and pleaded with you to tell him what your favourite song had been. Based on first impressions, which the show has been, then Canyon Moon and Watermelon Sugar had smothered you and given you no other option but to pick them.

If he were to ask you now you’d probably say To Be So Lonely, thanks to the drive home being longer than originally thought and said album being your choice of road trip music. 

Forget Driving Home For Christmas, nothing slapped more than one of your closest friends admitting to being an arrogant son of a bitch. 

After your chat, he mingled some more but Harry was always tactile and that night had been no different. He veered conversations with people you had never seen before to take place by the zone that you all occupied.

He actively kept his back against yours, allowing the faintest of touches and brushing of arms - sometimes hands too if he dropped them down heavily enough with his arms as he spoke - to entice and create a spark. 

You were kept late enough to miss the last tube. Battery dangerously low on your phone that you didn’t know if a transaction with Uber would be worth a try. 

Jumping into the same car as him had been easy. His soft and tired eyes findings yours in the cab as he leant his head back against the headrest in the back seat and let his lips tip upwards in an expression of tenderness that had you melting in your seat. 

“‘S been a while since we’ve both been a bit pissed in the back of a taxi,” he mused, pushing his fallen locks out of his eyes to ensure his view of you wasn’t obscured. “Come an’ cuddle me like you used to do when we went out a’ home and were worse for wear.”

Falling into his side was almost second nature, eyes closing as you let your forehead rest against his jawline and let his worn in cologne fill you senses and scatter your judgment.

You don’t even remember how you ended up kissing that night. A mixture of confessions about missing each other and praise of how good you both were in your own ways. The sound of his whispered, “are you coming home wi’me?” against your lips an offer too good for you to refuse as you sat pressed into his side and half in his lap. 

The giggles that night, around dramatic shushes as you tripped and shuffled from the car to his front door were almost haunting in your memory as he tried to chastise you around spluttered laughter about being respectful of his neighbours. 

Getting the key in the lock proved unchallenging -  one of the better analogies aligned to your memories and latter sexual endeavours - as you slipped into the house. He enjoyed watching the way you walked ahead of him into his home, not realising how much he needed that visual of seeing how well you fit in. 

While time seemed to slow in that moment, movements desperately sought the opposite. Hands gripped and clawed like their lives depended upon it. 

Looking back now, both he and you wished it hadn’t happened the way it did. Skirt lifted and over the side of his couch. Teeth clashing and hips knocking.

It had been every inch a drunken fumble. A first meeting slightly cheapened but wanted nonetheless. Only made even cheaper by the hush-hush concealing of it ever occurring. 

But a secret it was and a secret it would remain. 

And oh how you wished you had a pillow you could press you face into right now and scream, this time for an entirely different reason. Unlike that night. 

“Not seen a sign of any deer yet, mate,” you heard a voice break you out of your indulgence of recollecting past events. Harry was the worst at wanting to get a reaction. 

“Christ, have a bit of patience would yer?”

You smiled at the bickering, just like it always was as the River Dane could be heard in the distance somewhere as you walked. If you listened really close, that is. 

Lifting your eyes, your smile lingered as you watched Harry spin his body around and let his hands get lost in the massive pockets of his parka. He walked backwards holding your gaze softly with his eyes twinkling before he gently rolled them at the overreaction and impatience of your friends.

He seemed pleased that you’d enjoyed his teasing as you once again hid you smile into your jumper. 

You’d be alright.

***

You heard giggles and screams ahead of you as your friends stumbled in the dark and messed about as you got closer to the viaduct. This place or the people didn’t change, and at times while it filled you with a warm nostalgia, it could be heavily jarring.

A soft and lazy smile pulled at your lips as you felt his heavy forearm lightly tug you closer to him, his lips finding your hair. And then there was Harry. 

“Think we should go this way m’self,” Harry mumbled, the nudge of his hips against yours had you stumbling slightly in your heels away from the direction of your friends and somewhere completely different. 

“And why’s that?” You turned your face slightly, cheeks warm and flushed thanks to the mixture of alcoholic beverages; eyes glazed as they lifted up to look at him. 

“Cause you never would’ve let me when I was sixteen,” he admitted. 

“You didn’t ask.”

“‘M askin’ now.” 

With slow blinking eyes, you looked at his own unfocused vision. A soft shine to his skin, hair blowing gently against his forehead. The softest of smiles tilted at your lips.  

“On yer go,” he nudged you forward, this time more so with his crotch and his hands, which wrapped around your hips to help steer you. Harry was met with only a small amount of resistance from you as you split off from your friends and turned in the different direction. 

You bit back your laugh, dropping your head slightly as you felt your heels started to sink into the grass as you walked. Harry was level with you when you sunk down noticing the way you legs slightly gave way, a soft chuckle omitting from his throat as he asked, “You alrigh’?”

“I’m sinking in these bloody things,” you grumbled, pulling your heel from the grass and trying to place the sole of your shoe onto the ground beneath you first. 

“So much for no’ being able to take the country out o’ the girl. London’s changed yer, swear it.”

Shaking your head, you cut your eyes to give him a harsh stare for his wind up. His amused expression lit a fire in you like no other. He really wasn’t one to talk though, was he? 

“Gi’me your hand ‘ere,” he held his out to you, quickly cupping it when you handed it over and pulled it under his bent elbow. “Remind me again who’s idea this was, eh?”

He didn’t need reminding, he had been one of the keen instigators for the whole jaunt down Twemlow Viaduct. It usually was him, or Jack. The two of them often reminiscing on times they had both raided their parents' alcohol cupboards and managed to sneak out with some dusty bottle that held a liquor that tasted out of date and stale, and if not that then, cheap. 

“‘S still fucking freezing down ‘ere, in’it?” He asked, lifting his left hand up to his mouth and blowing against it to try and get some feeling back into his fingers.

“We’re so close to the river, I don’t know why you’d expect anything different?”

“Is this why everyone was always so insistent on necking anything with over 11% alcohol in it when we came down ‘ere as kids?”

“Probably,” you softly laughed. 

“‘S a bit different now though innit?”

“Oh, I’m not so sure,” you started to correct him, shrugging your hand out from under his elbow and reaching for your bag. Quickly fumbling with the clasp, you lifted up the quilted flap and managed to pull out the stainless steel hip flask.

Harry cackled a harsh laugh, his eyes crinkling as he slowly let his laughter die down and softly let his joy wash over his features. “Impressive. Gone all proper on me.”

“You know I haven’t,” you held his eyes watching as he nervously cupped at the back of his neck for a short while, a gentle bite down of his bottom lip, as you quickly uncapped the item and held it out to him. He looked like he needed the courage.  You continued, “We’re just a bit more refined, that and we earn a good living. Some more than others, and by some I mean you.” 

He held his hand up towards you with an amused grin at your comment. “You first, ‘s yours after all.” 

Lifting the item and knocking back your head, you swallowed the whiskey with a small grimace, before offering it to Harry once more. This time he accepted, his right hand making light work of taking the item from your hands and sipping at the contents.

His face wasn’t as contorted as your’s when he swallowed, a fan of the chosen beverage if needs must. “‘S the proper stuff, tha’ is,” he commented with a quick lick of his lips before continuing, “Come a long way from sneaking the bottles of dusty Blossom Hill from the back of the cupboard.”

“Don’t know about that,” you smiled, taking the item and pushing it back into your bag. “I’d still drink if, if it were on offer.”

“‘M sure Mum’s got a bottle or two going at home?”

“Is that your way of asking me to go home with you?” You paused. “Again.”

Harry remained silent at your words. Both you and he knew it was going to happen. A mixture of sparks and lovelorn, lingering glances was enough to make anyone both want to give up, while also giving a burning confidence usually unknown. 

Neither of you expected it would be you who started the conversation, however. 

“It is, ‘f it’s gonna work. ‘M not sure I could wait any longer t’be’onest wi’yer.“

Laughing, you reached up to push at his shoulder. He always knew exactly what to say, but no way was he going to make a laughing stock of the whole thing. “Oh, give over,” you spoke, harshly swallowing when he kept your hand against the thick cable knit black jumper he had on. “You’ve made it this far, thus far just fine.” 

“‘M not playin’,” he whispered, hand gently curling around your own and lifting it up to press against his face. His cheeks were warm underneath the cooler hands, despite the cold night whipping around you both and your mind quickly wondered if he was just as embarrassed for his lack of acknowledgment as you had been. “Homes nice, you’re nicer.”

“I thought we weren’t going to talk about it,” you let your soft voice get taken by the wind.

“An’ what gave you tha’ impression?”

He did. He gave you that impression. By not mentioning it. By treating you how he always did.

“You.”

“Me?” Harry responded, indignantly, blowing out a sigh that had his cheeks puffing out underneath your hand. “‘M not doing a very good job then am I? I can’t keep m’eyes off o’you. ‘S not my fault you don’t bloody notice ‘em.”

But you had noticed them. 

His eyes, gaze following your every move, near enough. Stupid little touches. Glances of approval. Not just now, but from years before. 

Treating you how he always did.

Oh, treating you how he always did.

Bringing your eyes back to his figure, you saw the way his gaze darted and nervousness dragged at his features. A frown began to set itself between his eyebrows from worry. 

“Changes everything.”

Running his tongue along his teeth, Harry pursed his lips. “Everythin’ has changed, changed a long time ago an’all.” 

You dropped your hand down, it now massaging against the back of his neck and shoulder as you felt the tension of his body radiating through his clothes. Under the dim moonlight and the odd spotlight that had been added to the viaduct with each passing year for safety, Harry exhumed everything anyone would want in a boyfriend. He was soft, and so bloody gorgeous. Not just because he was personification of an almost six foot tall string of handsomeness, but his character did the talking for him.

He knocked the door before he walked into a room, for example. Who really did that kind of thing anymore? 

But you could also still see the heartbreak that lingered, albeit not as strong as it once was, it was still there. And that was problematic and scary. To be on the receiving end of it. Not that you would hold it against him, because you had been him at one point too. At many points in fact. 

When the two of you had shagged, because let’s face it that is exactly what it had been, while a sense of familiarity in the person was prevalent it was definitely overruled by the desire to just hit a euphoric high that if hit right could not be topped. 

Familiar overruled in other aspects, and it wasn’t to be brushed away. But was familiarity a mask that would slip sooner rather than later? Was it the start and the end?

The both of you experienced similarities in your life that could not be matched by the friends in your friendship group. London had chewed you up and spat you out, ruthlessly so. While rewarding you with long hours but fat pay cheques, careers that catapulted you to new heights and enabled you to see parts of the world that two country kids (which in one way you were) could never have imagined. 

Sure Harry’s had been on a much, much larger scale - you would not ever deny that - but you no longer fit in. 

And neither did he. 

This was a place that only the two of you knew. A place where you watched those around you fall in love and have the time to do so. A place where your friend's happiness was created a lot easier than it wasn’t and allowed a sense of success to weave its way in, through the most unexpected of happenings.

Not a place where you found happiness in your work because there was less of a space for happiness to blossom elsewhere. Not really. Not like you; both of you. 

Understanding was vital. 

This had been a place you knew like the back of your hand. A place that had you feeling the earth beneath your feet, fresh air in your lungs and had at times made it so you found yourself sitting by a river and finding yourself feeling complete. 

Yet looking over at the almost 26 year old, that just wasn’t the case anymore. 

And for once you didn’t feel alone. 

The sound of the odd piece of cobbled pavement underneath Harry shoes, buried beneath overgrown grass and plants, broke you from your thoughts, as you watched him kick at the ground and scuff his shoes.

He sighed, head tilted back before he knocked it to the side and caught your eyes. A small scoffed laugh left his lips as he shook his head and dropped his gaze to his feet.

“‘S it fucked?”

You hummed, a small frown lacing your features.

“Fucked it, haven’t I? Fuckin’- idiot-“ he breathed out a noise as he clenched his teeth, one that wasn’t quite a growl but enough to let you know he was agitated. Only strengthened by how tight his jaw became. 

Before you could even think, the back of your hand gently brushed against the pulsing hinge of his jaw. Muscles taut as you tried to soothe him in a way that your mind was screaming was far too intimate.

You didn’t want him having any internal battle about right and wrong. Not when you had both taken the same steps to get here. 

“Thought it was just meant as a one time thing,” you admitted. “Like you needed it, and I needed it. Was what it needed to be at the time. Bit rough, bit sloppy-“

You cringed are the use of the word. Wanting the ground to swallow you in a weird fashion. You should be able to talk open and honestly with someone who you had known longer than hadn’t. 

“Rough?“ Harry swallowed audibly, his face fallen. “That’s not-“ 

His eyes held an emotion similar to sorrow at the mention of the word. “That’s not the impression I wanted to give you.” 

“We were both drunk, it happens.” 

“Not with me it doesn’t. Not when it’s me, wanting to be wi’you.”

“I mean I was into it if that helps anything?” 

“Were yer?”

You looked at him from the corner of your vision, watching his lips try to fight a smile as you rolled yours into your mouth to not give yourself away. You knew what you were trying to do by speaking those words aloud but you wished you hadn’t. Awkward breathy laughs were shared by the two of you as you held his eyes. 

“Was I?”

You hummed in agreement to answer his question, letting your smile dance along your lips now and watching as Harry’s dimples started to show. His expression was youthful, slightly smug. 

“Good t’know.”

***

Finishing saying your goodbyes to your friends and ignoring their suggestive expression because ‘Harry was stopping as an extra pair of hands’, you shut the heavy wooden door and reached up to close the deadbolt lock at the top. Shortly after, you let your feet drop as you stopped standing on your tiptoes and pressed your forehead against the door. 

The silence of the pub was always a strange one to you. A place that was usually thriving, whether it was just your friends, or your parents friends. When the lights were turned out, it was actually quite a lonely place. Regardless of growing up around this sort of industry your entire life and having parents as publicans nothing was more depressing than an empty bar, lifeless and nothing like it was intended.

A suggested lock-in from Jack, who managed to interrupt both yours and Harry’s conversation earlier had not been a bad shout after all. You knew it meant that you would have to deal with the fallout with it being Christmas Eve, but it wasn’t very often that you found yourself in the setting. 

Turning to move from the door, you almost jumped out of your skin when you heard the opening of a familiar Lily Allen song start to play over the speakers. 

Harry emerged from the corner of the pub that housed the jukebox, slowly rubbing his hands together before he wordlessly picked up the scattered pint glasses that had remained on one of the tables that had been missed by the staff on the evening shift. His eyes glanced over at you, as you stood with a hand to your chest.

This wicked smile and gleam washed over his face as he paused his movement. “Did I scare yer?”

“Do you not think it’s a bit loud?”

He wrinkled his nose at you, a soft shake of his head no, to answer your question. 

“‘S your fave innit?” He asked, head nudging to where the jukebox was now hidden.

With a small smile you nodded, “Prefer the Keane version in all honesty.”

“Don’t have it in the bloody jukebox though, d’yer? Can’t like it that much.”

Your smile deepened at his exclaim and how prominent his accent sounded as he spoke, the small clink of the glasses he was holding only heard if you really zoned in. 

“Where d’yer want these?” He asked, holding up the five pint glasses he had collected. “Behind t’bar?”

Humming, you nodded and watched as he weaved his way through the tables to you. You frowned as he got closer, not understanding why he hadn’t bypassed you completely.

Once he was close enough to you, you watched as he reached for what you knew to be your own glass of wine that was almost finished. 

“Fancy the rest of this or can it go too?”

Looking at him and down to the glass, you gently wrapped your hand around it and brought the lip to your mouth. You knocked the item back quickly, swallowing the rest of your wine, before handing over the now empty glass back to Harry.

“Good girl,” he joked, light laughter lacing each word. “Sit yourself down.”

Wearing an amused and quizzical expression, you let yourself sink down into the wooden chair. Resting your chin on your hand, you spun slightly in your seat to keep your eyes on Harry as he placed the glasses down and lifted the hatch so he could step behind the bar. 

With your free hand, you started to tap the worn beer coaster labelled with the Cheshire Brewhouse logo against the table. Part of you hated how Harry had a knack for anything, including knowing his way around a bar. 

He busied himself with collating the glasses once more as you let your eyes take in the surroundings you had known, loved and even grown out of. 

Your parent’s pub was cosy and friendly. A truly 

classic and quintessential British village pub, featuring open fires, bookcases found in the very far corner or the jukebox in the other, lots of old oak and a really pleasant garden with benches for the summat and heaters for the winter. You know the kind that had its regulars that had kids who had seen each other grow up.

The bar was the centre of the pubs house, with an extensive array of whiskies amongst many other delights. A nice range of local ales and a well-balanced, great quality list of wines on offer designed (which you would be taste testing if the service hadn’t decided to take a break) to complement the food menus designed daily by a team of chefs who all have a passion for great cooking using fresh, seasonal and local ingredients.

It looked as Christmassy as Christmas could get, with a real tree which was locally sourced from one of the many surrounding farms and traditionally decorated with golds and reds. Twinkly lights shone, not only on the trees but as part of the garland that was hung above the bar each year, much to the annoyance of your Dad and the delight of your Mum.

Slowly dragging your eyes back to the bar, you watched Harry as he poured you another glass of white wine and started to recap the bottle. He must’ve felt your eyes on him, his gaze meeting yours almost immediately. 

“Service is a bit slow,” you jibed, once you knew he was with you. “Going to ruin the reputation of a fine establishment.”

His chuckle was breathy in response, but warmed you through as he turned his back and pushed his tumbler glass up against the device at the bottom of the Glenfiddich distilled malt whiskey, not once but twice going for a double. 

“Helping yourself to the stock now, as well.” 

“‘M sure your Dad won’t mind,” he responded, twisting his body back around to reach for your own glass and place it onto a tray that sat along the bar top. “In fact he’d probably make a comment about how it’d put hairs on m’chest.”

You laughed, unrestrained, knowing just how right he had been with that comment. 

Over the otherside of the room, Harry smiled and shushed you as he walked closer, easily holding the tray with your drinks upon it. “Being a bit loud,” he taunted as he slid the tray down to the oak table.

“Oh, now you’re concerned about the noise.”

With his hand against the back of the chair which was currently housing your outstretched legs, you felt him start to wobble the seat to give you a warning. 

“Hang on,” you said, “Plenty of other chairs.”

“This one’s mine,” he responded.

Wanting to roll your eyes but deciding not to, you let your legs drop down and gave the seat back to Harry. Once he was comfortable and he’d taken your drink off the tray, he gestured with his right hand.

Not entirely focused, he had to do the ‘come hither’ motion a couple of times before you finally cottoned on. He was willing to let you put your legs on his lap instead, while he may have taken the seat it didn’t mean he wanted to take away your comfort.

No sooner had your legs been raised to rest against his tan washed velvet corduroy trousers, was he fiddling with the buckle of your stiletto sandals.

“Got mud everywhere,” you commented, wiggling your toes that were painted a festive red and inspecting the little dots of dirt that were splattered against your skin, as Harry dropped the first shoe to the floor and quickly worked on the second. “Dread to think what they smell like.”

“Smell alrigh’ from ‘ere,” he mused, smirk faint but glaring obvious in his tone of voice as he threw a quick and mischievous glance at you. As you elongated your foot against his thighs, the tips of your toes were just about able to press into his thick jumper to try and jab at him for his comment. 

Before you were able to put any sort of force behind your action, Harry’s hand clamped down around the top of your foot causing your eyes to snap up away from his hand and up to his eyes.

There he sat watching you, top two teeth pressed into his bottom lip keep his smile at bay. Releasing his lips slowly, his whispered threat left his throat, “I will tickle.”

You tried to fidget away but to no avail. With a whined laugh, you frowned as Harry goaded you by slowly raising his eyebrows. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Try me.”

You had tried him. 

Truth be told you wanted to again.

If he wanted to.

Reaching for your wine, you took a hefty sip and let the silence swallow you both. Harry, who kept his hand on your foot and his fingers dancing gently against the top, let his head fall back awkwardly against the hardwood. His head dropped to the side taking in his surroundings and their familiarity. 

“Do you ever get tired of coming back?” 

You hummed, sure you had misheard due to the way the blood was rushing around your ears. He turned to look at you, all double chin and puffy cheeks.

“Of everything being the same, but different?”

His whispers captivated you, hushed confessions not quite meant for anyone else but his own mind yet spilling from him with such an ease that he did nothing to fight them. 

“I’ll admit, I come home for other people. Not for me.”

“People?”

“Mum, Dad,” you paused. “You.”

His smile deepened. His chin knocking down to his chest, his eyes looking up at you from underneath his curling hair from being caught in the moist winter evening just hours before.

“You can stop looking at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like you did three nights ago.”

Harry breathed in deeply, his nostrils flaring and his chest expanding. A lick of his lips, before his mouth dropped to sit slightly agape. 

“What if I don’t wan’to? What if I want t’look at yer like this all the time?”

You found yourself unable to respond, nose burying itself into your wine glass as you pressed your lips against the cool outside to try and hide your burning smile. 

His lips curled lightly, before he breathed a laugh once and gently shook your foot with his hand. “Eh? Come ‘ere-“

“Harry,” you breathed.

“C’mon, c’mere. ‘S room for more than just your feet.”

If it wasn’t for the creak of your chair as you slowly started to push yourself out of it, you wouldn’t have consciously been aware of how you were making your way to him. 

His body relaxed, somehow managing to become closer to horizontal than sitting upright in his seat, as he peered as you walking the short distance over to him. 

With his legs widened, he pressed his face into your side now that you were close enough. His nose inhaled the familiar scent of your perfume which was only faint now due to the other senses and scents it had mixed with throughout the evening.

Rolling his face out of your body, he knocked his head back and pressed his chin where his face had been. The face you showed him was worn with worry, an expression he did not want to meet.

“‘S wrong?”

His ask was lazy. Not wanting to dig deep and know. What if he didn’t like what he found? 

“We know how this is going to end.”

“Do we?” He prodded. His eyes moved over your features quickly before they partly disappeared to him, thanks to your curtain of hair which slowly fell down.

His hand reached up, desperately brushing it away and cupping at the back of your head as best as he could while he remained seated. 

“How’s that? Tell me.”

“Same, but different.” 

You knew you shouldn’t use his words, not in a way that could be considered against him, but they - in the most ambiguous of ways - described everything perfectly. 

“Not if I have my way.” 

His words were almost lost against your stomach as he pressed his face against you once more and wrapped his hands around you; sweaty, nervous palms pressing to the backs of your thighs. 

“Same, but better.”

Harry guided you down to his lap, his lips somehow managing to remain pressed into stomach, or your chest, or your clavicle, as your face became level with his. 

“Different, but better.” 

He kissed against your cheek slowly, nose nudging at your skin as he willed for you to relax against him. “I don’t know how you like it, like this,” he whispered in confession. “Show me?”

A puff of air left your lips as you turned to look at him with hooded eyes. His mouth was closer to yours than you originally thought, corners of lips brushing as you slightly pulled away. 

When your lips met, it was in the softest of pecks that trembled under your nerves. Both sets of eyes looking back at each other as you innocently engaged. 

If you were to take your eyes away from him in any way, you would notice those fluffy curls of his falling over his forehead and the lightest dusting of red blush making itself known against his cheeks and the tops of his ears.

He felt like a school boy, lost and clumsy. The kid who was once again flicking paper at you in science class just so he could pull a face at you over something your teacher was saying to get you to laugh. 

Mouths hovering over each other, your breathing mixed, as Harry nodded to you slightly. You pressed your lips to his once more, feeling the way he gradually opened up to you, warmed and softened underneath the puckering of your mouth against his. 

His hands, that slightly trembled, smoothed over your hips trying to pull your body so that it was more so flush against his. You moaned softly, your hands running over his jumper covered shoulders, fingers digging and pulling at the material just below the nape of his neck. 

The chair beneath you moved lightly against the floor, not quite a scrape but a dull drag. Neither of you broke the kiss, but his hands against you allowed fingers to dig in to hold you steady to him so if you were to fall from where you were sitting, he still had you. 

His lips slowed, moving to press against your cheeks again as he panted and his warmth breath bounced off your skin. “Think I got it,” he heaved. 

“Do you?”

Harry hummed his ‘yea’, before pressing his lips so tenderly to your chin and the underside of your jaw. He felt how you swallowed heavily, throat dry from the way your mouth hung open and your neck further exposed itself as you lolled your head back. 

You were falling further and further back, finding it hard to stay upright as he devoured you and made you weaker with each pulling kiss. His groans were needy, muffled and making your ache. While yours were silent and making his desperate to pull something from you. To build is confidence in that he was doing something right, you liked it this way too. 

Hands fumbled and dragged upwards at your skirt, faintly aware now how it was similar - if not the same one - to the garment you wore to his show. 

“Gonna take this off properly,” he mumbled, feeling the way your hips moved slightly from his hands to roll over him. 

“You don’t have to-“

“No?” 

Your voices were rushed as you spoke to each other, barely audible but loud enough all the same. His head was knocked back slightly as you hovered over him and you found yourself admiring his blissed out face even only in the lead up.

This was a sight that you hadn’t received last time, and if you had your way it was one you were going to greedily enjoy in all its glory.

Like watching the way his eyes closed and he softly grinned, the left side of his teeth started to show as the one side of his face reacted first while your hands blindly moved to lift up his jumper and the white tee he had on underneath, to allow you to find the button of his corduroys.

“What ya doing?”

“Nothing,” you mused. 

He pulled a face, the kind that down turned his lips, eyebrows raised and head slightly tilted to the side. The kind that had you smiling. 

“Not trying to get m’trousers around m’ankles for a second time within a week then?”

You giggled. “No.”

“Please do.”

A low moan left you as you pressed your forehead to his jaw and dropped your eyes. Your hands slowly started to pull at the brass button and pop it open before seeking out the zip thanks to his desperate plea, encouraging you to continue. 

Hands quickly sought out the waistband of the trousers and gently pulled at the item. From the way that you were sat, you knew there was no way you were doing to make them budge.

“Stand up fo’ me,” he mumbled, quickly helping you get off his lap so that he could make light work of his clothing and pull down his trousers and underwear. 

His bare bum made easy contact with the cushion leather beneath him, eyes carefully watching you as your hands moved to underneath your skirt. 

The fabric of your underwear slipped so easily down your legs, his eyes just about caught the sight of them as they pooled against your ankles and you kicked them away. 

Legs pressed together, you slowly untucked the v-necked blouse you had chosen and pulled it over your head. Wearing nothing but a fancy black bra, and a tight little skirt you hastily snatched for your wine and took a hefty gulp.

You could feel his eyes on you, a gruff groan catching in the back of his throat and when you finally turned your eyes from where they had been looking down at your heaving chest and how great this bra made your boobs look, causing him to move his hand down to start playing with himself. 

His name left your lips in a breathy gasp, causing you to look up quite surprised at the find of his right hand gently tugging at his hard length.

“Keepin’ me waitin’,” he groaned, his left hand sloppily reached for the back of the collar of his jumper and tee, pulling the item roughly over his head.

“Fuck sake,” he mumbled under his breath, agitated that he was unable to get both items of in one go.

“Smooth.”

Harry stared up at you with a playful squint, before he gently fell back and moved the chair as he did so, the dull scrape heard once more. 

And if you didn’t know he was flushed before, when you first kissed, you were definitely aware now. His eyes were blown out and hungry as they devoured you. Hair wildly haphazard before he let go of himself with a soft slap of his skin and harshly pushed his fingers through it.

“‘S it still a couple of quid for a strip of three,” his words brought you back to him. This smugness radiated off of him as he groaned and leaned forward to push his trousers down all of the way. Over his vans and socked feet, before he toed them off as well be harshly pulled at his white sport socks. 

You didn’t even need for him to explain what he meant, staying silent as you watched his hands tug at his corduroys from the floor and retrieve his wallet. As his fingers moved around to find a couple of quid, the jangle of the coins was taunting. 

One leg crossed over the other, you swayed and found yourself blushing when he looked up at you once he’d managed to find enough money and then some. With his wallet thrown on the table, he stood proudly from the seat and closed the short gap between your both.

Leaning forward he easily took your lips with his own before pulling away. With his face still close to yours he whispered, “Promise not to look at my arse.”

He didn’t hang around long enough for your reply, instead turning away and brazenly giving you all the time you would ever need to admire him, his fantastic bum and his hairy legs before he opted for a jog-walk type of thing, suddenly conscious that he was absolutely walking around naked from the waist down in a pub owned by your parents. 

While you waited you took a quick pull from his whiskey, needing the heftier burn for Dutch courage. Nervousness returned when you heard the endings of what you believed to be Harry whistling. 

“Machine ate all m’fuckin’ change,” he grumbled, regardless of the twinkle in his eye at the strip of overpriced condoms he had managed to score from the men’s bathroom. “‘S Durex. Business must be booming, your Dad’s definitely gone up in the world.” 

“Please don’t talk about my Dad.”

He smiled brightly before he reached for your face with one hand and pulled you towards him mumbling his ‘sorry’s’ against your lips as he gave you several kisses in quick succession. 

His other arm loosely wrapped around your back and pulled you with him as he walked backwards and slowly lowered himself back onto his previous seat. The chair creaked as you joined him, slipping into his lap and feeling the way he was smiling now.

Pulling away from your kiss, he quickly tore away one of the condoms allowing the others to fall without much care to the floor. Teeth took a hold of the foil-like packaging and he tore it not so elegantly with his eagerness.

With his cock nestled in the crease of his own thigh now, the heat radiating from it matched your own agonising yearning. Scooting back to give him space, you heard him groan as he gently rolled the condom down onto himself. Eyes looking up just in time to see him knocking his head back and breathing deeply through nose. The foil-like packaging was back in between his teeth once more as his hands were otherwise preoccupied.

Slowly your hand reached up to take it from his mouth, feeling some playful resistance as Harry continued to hold it in his teeth. His eyes were open and boyishly sincere, as you tugged at the item and he finally released it when you lightly laughed. 

“Gi’me a kiss.”

Obliging him, you leant forward and slotted your mouths together a lot easier than you had done at the start of the night. A heat built easily between the two of you, as Harry gave you his tongue and you felt the flex of his jaw under your hand as he worked your mouths together.

He was eager, his hands tightening on your waist before he growled when he understood he had to grab handfuls of skirt before he could cup your backside. But when his skin met yours and you ground down onto his lap, the groan that left him was the most animalistic sound imaginable. 

The frown your face fell into showed your desire to whimper, as he kept you atop him and marvelled in the way you writhed, both from satisfaction and keenness at the pressure of his cock against you. 

“Can I have you again?” He asked, the startings of sweaty hair being pushed off your face. His eyes peered at you, searching for his answer as you seemed to be able to do nothing but pant and look back at him yearningly. “Are you letting me?”

You dragged your fingers down his t-shirt covered torso and lifted it slightly just to see the quiver of his stomach as pulled you onto him once more. 

“Like this?” you voiced, meekly.

“‘F this is what you like then, yea’”, he breathed into your mouth, hands shifting your pliant body. “Is this what you want?”

You wordlessly nod, mouth falling open in a breathy gasp when he managed to move you so he sat so enticingly at your entrance. He was teasing both yourself and him, wanting to keep you both on the edge. 

Harry blinked a few times as he looked at you, and you revelled in the way he couldn’t seem to concentrate. His hands held your flesh tightly, fingertips dipping into the skin of your bum cheeks as he gently guided you down.

An unattractive and dull, quite strangled noise, left your throat as you let your forehead fall against his temple. Eyes falling down you see the cups of your bra fall slack, you felt his hands softly gliding over your shoulder blades and shoulders. 

He rid you of your bra, hands moving to your chest to squeeze your breasts. His jaw fell slack when you found yourself sitting snugly on his lap - on him - settled and already feeling spent.

This was so different compared to the last time; if not overwhelming so because of the way you both appeared to be so present. Each movement of your hips, and the way they rolled and grinded and dragged felt too much. So much so that you had become nothing more than a mess of short, quick breathing and blushing, sweaty cheeks. 

Slack-jaw, you were unable to find it in you to return Harry’s kisses, and his joyful, breathy chuckle seemed to lead you to believe he was fine with it. In fact he was happy to keep going as you were. 

Your movements were frantic, and despite the build up, not entirely driven by lust either. Harry continued to encourage you to move as you were; slow, grinding motions on his lap that caused the filthiest of groans and dirtiest of laughs from the two of you. Laughter that was only made stronger as the chair that held you both started to creak too. 

You couldn’t do much about it though other than to breathe into each other’s mouth, and rock your hips together with more fervour each time. 

“Yea’,” he breathed against your lips, left hand at the back of your head holding you to him, while his right rested just above your bum. “‘S better. That’s better.”

It was better. Better than last time. Better than anything before. 

And while it hadn’t been frantic before, it was now as your legs that were hanging down either side of the chair started to tremble and your toes started to dig into the worn carpet beneath them. Hips knocking and your clit dragging heavenly against his public bone, you grasped his name as you buried your face into his neck and dug your nails into his nape.

Harry hissed his approval which fell to a groan as your nails pushed up into his hair and lightly pulled as you sought leverage. There were so many things you were learning this time around and his penchant for liking his hair pulled from time to time, was one of those things. 

“God, ‘m gonna come soon,” he admitted, gruntly as he forced your hips down as he anchored his legs and widened his seating position. “Are you close?”

“Yeah,” you whined. “Yes. Like this-“

And as you pressed your face to his once more, he was everywhere. Soft but hard, loving but commanding. Smelled like clean washing detergent but of country air. Inviting and alluring, allowing you your lingering kisses between grounding breaths that became staccato in unison with the movement of your hips. 

You aren’t ashamed of the whines that escaped your throat as you squeezed down on his cock, praised by indecipherable works that left Harry but were nothing more to you than lips moving against your rough and dry ones. Word that made the burning feeling of your pending orgasm spread through your entire body, warming you and setting you alight.

It was long and deep, with your toes curling into the carpet they were pressed against now. Barely able to catch your breath, sucking in harshly and shaking. 

And when you came to, thoroughly exhausted, you noticed that he was waiting for your say so. That he could let go and enjoy the pleasure brought about by your shared labour. 

“Coming-“ was all the warning that you got and was enough to encourage you to watch him as he came, his face completely void of anything other than pure pleasure. Wrinkles and frowns fade, his mouth falling open with his pink lips glinting prettily under the dim Christmas lights around you.

His forehead gleamed with sweat as he wrapped his arms around you tightly and his hips bucked up one, two and three times for good measure. “Fuck me,” he heaved gruffly.

You were suddenly desperate to feel his lips on yours despite the way you both continued to fight to get your breath back, but settled for resting them against the skin of his cheek, which was hot to the touch. 

When you felt Harry start to go soft, you reluctantly pulled away and let him slip out of you. He wasn’t so keen to let you get too far, holding you just that bit higher than before with his hand cupping gently but firmly at your hip. “Where’d you think you’re going,” he hummed, eyes still closed as he continued to heavily inhale and exhale. 

You softly smiled, taking in his soft face and responded by nuzzling close to him again. 

Nowhere. Somewhere. Anywhere with him.

A place where only the two of you knew, like the back of your hand. The same way you knew each other. Now and possibly forever.

[imagine-sterek]

This is me submitting me a prompt for Christmas-in-July event:

5 times Derek was on the recieving end of a miracle and one time he saw who was the one responsible for them. (Hint: It’s Stiles).

1.

After the Hale fire, Derek and Laura had to stay in Beacon Hills while the police investigated. They stayed at the run down motel on the outskirts of town. Derek was still young and dreaded the thought of Christmas without his family. But when he wakes up on Christmas Day, Laura suggests they go for a walk to take their mind off of it. When they open the door to their motel room, there's a small Christmas tree set up outside their room with a few presents underneath it. Derek thinks Laura did it but she says she didn't, and when they look closer, the stickers/labels on the presents say they're from their parents.

2.

Laura dropped out of school and picked up two jobs to pay rent so she and Derek had somewhere to live and so she could pay for her brother's education, but money's tight and sometimes she doesn't have enough money to buy food. When Laura and Derek get home that afternoon, there bags of groceries on their porch.

3.

Derek has a necklace that his father gave him when he was younger. He treasures it more than anything, but one day he has to make the heart-breaking decision to pawn it in order to help his sister pay for food and rent. That evening, the doorbell rings but when Derek opens the door, no one's there--just a small box. Derek brings it inside and opens the box to find the necklace.

4.

Every Christmas, Derek throws a Christmas lunch for the disadvantaged, disabled, or homeless and vulnerable people of the community. Every year, he dresses up as Santa and hands out presents to those who come. Usually he has enough presents to give to 50 or 60 people because that's the most that have shown up in the past (and any left over presents go to children in the hospital or to charities), but this year there were over a hundred people. Derek starts to worry when Cora tells him to come out the back. Derek follows her and finds a (literal) sleigh of presents, more than enough for everyone. There's a note that just says 'Merry Christmas'.

5.

Derek adopted a rescue dog, but on Christmas Eve, his dog went missing. He and his sisters searched for hours with no luck. Christmas morning, Derek hasn't slept. He gets a call from the vet even though they're closed saying someone found his dog and had brought him in to make sure he was okay. Derek hurries to the vet. His dog is freezing cold and wrapped in blankets, but that's not going to stop the pup from leaping into his arms.

---

1.

Derek's flight got in late and it was pitch black by the time he started driving home. He wanted to surprise his sisters for Christmas. All of a sudden, his ca breaks down. He's in the middle of nowhere on quiet roads where the last car he passed was over an hour ago. He pulls out his phone but he has no signal and low battery. There's no one to ask for help. Derek lets out a frustrated sigh and puts his head on the steering wheel. "If there is such things as Christmas miracles, I need one right now.”

All of a sudden, a bright light pierces the darkness.

A car drives up from behind him and slows down, pulling over to the side of the road. The driver gets out and walks over to Derek. "You okay?"

"Car's dead," Derek tells him.

"I'll give you a lift," the stranger offers.

Derek knows all about stranger danger, but there's something about the young man that puts him at ease and makes him feel like he can trust him.

Derek gets out of his car, locking it behind him as he follows the stranger over to his Jeep.

"I'm Derek," he introduces himself.

"I know," the young man says as he opens the driver's side door.

The car light illuminates his face and Derek realises who he is.

Stiles.

[apiratewhopines]

This one is a gift for @teamhook because she is one of the most generous people I’ve ever met.

Thanks to @jrob64 for giving me advice on artwork and to ultraluckycatnd for reading over this chapter

Midnight

Chapter 1 — The Prince

Summary: In which our heroine meets cute

Chapter 1 of 7 on AO3

“But don’t forget folks,

That’s what you get folks

For makin’ whoopee”

-Makin’ Whoopee, Eddie Cantor

Emma Swan had been in some tight spots, but she’d never been in a run out of gas on a deserted highway with a dying cell phone battery and a stomach as empty as her bank account kind of situation before. In truth, she blamed this unfortunate situation on the same person she blamed all the misfortunes of her adulthood. Neal Cassidy.

There was a time a few short months ago she would have done anything for the man responsible for her current circumstances. Neal had been too good to be true. A real Prince Charming, down to the supposed trust fund and a smile that made her believe in happy endings.

She’d been a sucker. She heard one was born every minute, she just never thought her time would come. After all, one of the few things she learned in the foster system was how to spot bullshit from a mile away. But he looked at her with his soulful eyes and whispered promises in his smoky voice and she fell for it. More than once, actually, and all she had to show for the wasted years was a voicemail box full of collection calls and a wolf at the door.

Because Neal Cassidy didn’t just leave her. He stole her identity, maxed out her credit cards, and took out half a dozen loans in her name. Then he proceeded to use the money to wine and dine a wide assortment of women, the sheer number of which would make Casanova blush. All the while professing his undying love and spending his days eating all her food and watching television from his favorite seat on the couch.

Seriously, you could still see the faint outline of his backside on the cushion.

As countless victims of his schemes started showing up at her door looking for the man who made them feel alive while killing them one dollar at a time, she listened to tears and rants and misery with ill-disguised impatience. How had she become the counselor to the trail of broken girls he left in his wake? When was it going to be her turn to moan and groan and swear she’d never love again?

Well, she did get around to the swearing to never love again part. Some mistakes don’t bear repeating.

The final straw happened two months ago. Neal had disappeared after their final fight. His righteous indignation at being called on his crap and inability to find a plausible excuse for the stack of overdue bills and statements she found stuffed in the back of his gym bag made it difficult to share the same space. She wanted him gone even as her hands itched to touch him one more time.

Unfortunately, leaving her drowning in debt with the knowledge he cheated on her for the majority of their relationship wasn’t enough for him. He decided to do some collateral damage on his way out of town.

He did the unforgivable. He went after Granny.

His target was meant to wound her. While he lied and schemed the entire time they were together, she had been an open book for the first time in her life so he knew Granny was the sole connection she formed as a foster. Her brief stay with the woman before she aged out of the system was a time of peace and healing. Granny was responsible for helping her get on her feet and the two maintained a friendship years later.

Emma received the frantic call from Ruby explaining her grandmother had been tricked into giving Neal a blank check so he could do her grocery run. Hours later, she received a notification from her bank saying her checking account had been wiped out. At that point, the tenuous control Emma had on her emotions disappeared. She sat on the kitchen floor of the apartment she was about to lose, staring at empty walls that still echoed with his laughter in her weaker moments, and she broke into a million pieces.

So it was no wonder she vowed to have her vengeance. To do anything and everything to make him pay. Luckily, since he skipped out on a court date, catching him would also get her paid.

Tracking him had taken more time than she liked to admit. She was good; even penniless and running out of options, she recognized her worth and knew she possessed hard to find skill sets. But she had a sinking sensation that he might be better.

Now she was stranded on the side of the road with nothing except her most uncomfortable shoes to keep her company. But damn did they make her legs look good and with everything else in her life collapsing around her, somehow that seemed important.

Squaring her shoulders, she climbed out of the car and pondered her next course of action. She was unfamiliar with the state road connecting the two small towns on the Maine coast, so she had no idea what the odds were that a good samaritan would happen along. She had just enough juice in her battery and lettuce in her account to call for an Uber to take her to the seedy nightclub where Neal was last seen. Or she could walk the rest of the way in her mile-high heels knowing she never looked better, even though she would probably not be able to move the next day without a significant amount of pain.

What she would do if she found him or where she would stay if she didn’t weren’t questions she was ready to entertain.

Sighing, she pulled out her phone and with a huff of frustration opened her app. Pleading with whatever powers that be to let her last long enough to see herself through to the other side of this, she leaned against her beaten down yellow Bug and waited for the black sedan to show.

Of course, her phone died immediately after she booked her ride, finally giving up the ghost even though she didn’t get a chance to see the name or license plate of her hired car. Getting more anxious by the minute, she paced along the shoulder, careful to keep on the pavement since the ground was soft from recent rain. After what seemed like forever, but had probably not been more than half an hour, the headlights of a lone car crested a nearby hill.

“About time,” she muttered. To make sure the driver knew she was not pleased with the delay or the prodding pace he maintained despite the fact the sky seemed ready to open at any moment, she moved out into the middle of the lane and placed her hand on her hips. Pride kept her from squinting even though the bright high beams made her eyes water as the car approached.

Slowing from a crawl to a stop, the driver put the car in park and jumped out. It was dark and the man was dressed all in black, but as he moved around to the front of the car, she got the impression of blue eyes and a stubble-covered jaw that could probably cut glass. Great, just what she needed. A sexy Uber driver.

“Alright there, love?”

With a British accent. He probably smelled like bacon, too.

“What took you so long? I’ve been waiting all night.”

Moving closer, he smiled with a hint of confusion. “Had I known you were waiting for me, I would have been along sooner. Tell me, do you always accost strange men in the dead of night on empty roads?”

“Only when I’m paying them to take me where I need to go,” she grumbled, walking toward the back door on the passenger side. She pulled it open as he protested, and glared at him over the top of the car.

“Love, I think there may be a bit of a mix-up—“

“It’s fine. I won’t give you a bad rating for being late as long as you don’t talk to me. I’ve been driving for hours to get here and I need to think.”

She heard him sigh and saw the flash of his teeth as he smiled at her again. “Very well. Would you like me to get your bags?”

“You’d have to go to a pawn shop in Boston to accomplish that,” she joked, dropping into the leather seat and noticing for the first time the expensive luxury of her rented carriage. She supposed if she was going to spend her last dime on a ride, she could have done far worse.

She resisted the urge to use the low ambient lighting of the dashboard to get a better look at her temporary chauffeur. The glimpse she got outside was more than enough to know she needed to keep her distance. It didn’t stop her from feeling the weight of his stare as he peeked over his shoulder while clicking on his seatbelt. Out of the corner of her eye, she could have sworn she saw his tongue flicker slowly over his bottom lip before he turned his attention back to the road.

“Nice dress. Where are we heading this fine night, Miss…?”

“You’re really terrible at this. Is it your first time being a driver for hire?”

“What gave it away, love? It’s quite an unexpected development that came about just this evening. But you know what they say, you never forget your first.”

It was everything she could do not to laugh. She had a feeling it would only encourage him and if she was heading into battle, she needed her wits about her. “The Snakehole Lounge.”

“At the risk of sounding cliche, why would a nice girl like you want to go to a place like that?”

“I’m not a nice girl,” Emma informed him without a hint of irony or bravado. “And your rating is going down with each syllable out of your mouth.”

“Tough lass,” he murmured. “But do yourself a favor. Stay away from the Snake Juice.”

Little did he know that even if she wanted to have a drink, and boy did she ever, she used the last of her meager funds to get to this backwater place and she wasn’t sure where her next meal would come from. “I’ll do my best.”

The rest of the ride passed in silence. She spent the time looking out the window at the trees flying by and trying to ignore how every time she looked away, her eyes caught his in the rearview mirror.

Honestly, it was probably a good thing they were the only people for miles around or he would have gotten them both killed.

Less than fifteen minutes later, he pulled to the curb in front of a shabby nightclub. Even the multitude of neon lights flashing “Girls! Girls! Girls!” and “Half-Price Beer Buckets” did little to enliven the dingy exterior. They didn’t bother with a bouncer, probably because no one actually wanted to get in.

Before she could say anything, her driver was out of the car and rounding his way to her door. She didn’t have a chance to object as he opened it and looked at her with avid curiosity. She had to admit she was impressed he didn’t give into it and ask any questions.

“Since we’re out of the car, am I allowed to speak again?”

Perhaps she had been too hasty in her internal praise. “Thanks for the ride. I hope your next passengers are more chatty since that’s what you’re into...overall, a solid three stars.”

“Three stars? I’d be surprised, but I had a feeling you were warming up to me between the baleful stares and eye-rolling.”

Gifting him with another of the said eye rolls, she adjusted the hem of her skirt to show a little more leg and walked away. She knew if she stayed a second longer she would give in to the almost magnetic pull of him and say something foolish like, ‘What’s your name?’

—

The inside of the establishment was every bit as horrible as the outside. The low lighting obscured the grime and wear that would be glaringly obvious otherwise. She wasn’t surprised. It seemed like the kind of place Neal would gravitate to since he was a dirty little rat.

Music heavy with bass pumped out a rhythm entirely too fast for the energy of the place. The few patrons who persevered this far into the night looked anemic as tired dancers did their best to act like they wanted to be there. Pulling her ID from the scrap of a bra she wore under her dress, she flashed it at the lone employee who manned the entrance and the bar. He gave it a cursory glance and turned back to his phone.

Snapping her fingers under his nose to get his attention, she pulled out a grainy photo of her quarry from the same location and asked, “Have you seen this man recently?”

“I’ve never seen anyone. Ever.” The man grumbled, not interested in the slightest. She wondered if he would stop her if she walked behind the counter and helped herself to a drink. She was leaning toward no and tempted to try.

“Tell you what buddy, take a good look at this picture. Then look me in the eye and tell me you haven’t seen him and we’ll end the night without any trouble.”

Something in her tone must have penetrated his disillusionment and he gazed at her with more interest than he’d probably shown anything in years. She waited as he glanced at the photo for a few seconds. “No, sorry. If he’s been here, it wasn’t during any of my shifts. Is he your husband or something?”

“He’s something alright,” she muttered. Defeated, she turned around without another word. She used the last of her resources to fund a wild goose chase, but at least it got her into town. Only thing left to do was find a park or quiet bench somewhere safe to sleep for a few hours and then she would tackle whatever came next. It wouldn’t be the first time she roughed it, although she had never attempted it in formal wear before.

Pushing the door open with unnecessary force, she immediately froze. Her three star driver was waiting at the curb as if it wasn’t the middle of the night and she hadn’t given him the brush off.

“Fancy meeting you here.”

“Yes, especially since I’m pretty sure our business is done,” she replied, walking past him and wishing the man could be a tiny bit less handsome. Now that the streetlights of the small town were there to illuminate their interactions, she couldn’t deny he was ridiculously attractive and exactly her type, complete with a black leather jacket and messy hair begging to be pulled. And, heaven help her, he was determined to extend their acquaintance apparently.

“It’s just good sense, love. I figured you’d be in need of transportation again, so why waste the gas to leave when I’d have to turn around after you called for your next ride.” He matched his stride to hers as she did her best to increase her pace.

Sighing, she stopped at the corner and looked at him. “Listen, I could tell you my phone is dead and I need to make a few more stops, that I’d pay you when you drop me off at my place at the end of the night, but it would be a lie. I’m chasing down a bounty. I need the money to pay for a ride and I need a ride to make the money. A smart man like you can see the problem. Now, if you’ll excuse me…”

She turned away again but felt him leap into action behind her. He moved to cut off her escape and said, “Double or nothing.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Double or nothing, sweetheart. I take you to wherever you need to go tonight and when you collect your fee, you pay me double whatever the normal fare is for jaunts like these.”

“What if I don’t find him?”

“That’s where the nothing comes in, lass. A smart woman like you can see the benefit of such an arrangement.”

She studied him, hoping to find some ulterior motive in his seemingly selfless offer, but all she saw in his expression was an earnestness bordering on being painful and a thirst for adventure barely contained. Perhaps this was how he got his kicks in an isolated town. He propositioned strangers and gambled on fate. “No strings? No funny business?”

“This whole business is funny, but I’ll behave myself if you will. We’ll have much less satisfaction that way, but I’ll do my best to rally my spirits and overcome my disappointment.”

With a rueful shake of her head, she stuck out her hand and introduced herself. “I guess we’re doing this. I’m Emma Swan.”

“Killian Jones, driver extraordinaire and captain of this fine vessel, at your service. Where’s our next stop?”

“I need to go to every seedy bar and filthy dive in the area so you tell me, Captain.”

—

She wasn’t sure what it said about her newfound companion that he was able to rattle off several places in a matter of seconds, but as the night stretched on and the miles racked up, she found she rather liked her tour guide. Which was probably a good thing since at this rate, she would be splitting the bounty fifty-fifty with him. Who knew the twin cities of Storybrooke and Misthaven had so many sleazy places to hang out?

“I’m afraid we’ve reached the end of the line, Swan. Are you sure he’s in the area, because every traveler worth his salt makes a point to stop by Moe’s Tavern while visiting our fair city.”

“I can see why. The thrift-store ambience is delightful and the watered down drinks are to die for,” she murmured as she rested against the side of his car. She was tired and weak from hunger and as much as she wanted to curl up in the back seat and sleep, she was scared she’d get used to the comfort he was offering and do something she might regret later.

She was trying to figure out how to cut and run without seeming ungrateful when her stomach growled loudly.

In a playful tone belaying the concern in his eyes, he asked, “Was that your stomach? Bloody hell, am I in danger? Are you going to try to eat me to satisfy the beast within?”

Feeling a blush color her face, she avoided his gaze as she said, “Sorry, I...um, I skipped dinner.” And breakfast and lunch for that matter.

Taking up a position next to her, he nudged her with his shoulder. “Tell the truth, when was the last time you ate something, lass?”

“Hmm, what day is it again?”

“As I suspected. Come on, I know just the spot.” Pushing off from the car, he gently moved her and opened the door to the backseat.

She wanted to fight, to tell him she could take care of herself. She would have too, if she had any energy at all. Meeting his eyes for the first time, she joked, “You lost a gamble, Captain. That doesn’t mean you have to feed it.”

“I consider it an act of self-preservation. I figured you for a man-eater the first moment I laid eyes on you, but I’m afraid you might prove me right in unexpected ways if we don’t get some food in you soon.”

“As long as eyes are all you plan on laying on me, I accept your gracious offer,” she replied with a narrowed stare. Before Neal, she trusted her instincts. She would have insisted they were infallible, but he had shaken her confidence. She couldn’t risk being wrong about Killian Jones of the electric eyes and perpetual helpfulness.

“No strings. No funny business, Swan. Those are the rules. Get in, your chariot and dinner awaits.”

He stood a few feet from her, urging her into the car and she wasn’t sure what drove her to say it, but before she could change her mind, the words were out. “I’d rather ride in the front this time if that’s okay with you.”

His smile could have melted metal, tempted angels to fall, and inspired devils to repent. It was probably lack of rest and food causing her stomach to do flip flops. Or at least that was what she was going to tell herself.

“Your heart’s desire, Swan. I promise that’s all I want you to have…” He closed the back door with a firm finality that echoed through the night and somehow felt momentous in the thick air of summer. When he opened the passenger door, the light seemed warmer and it bathed him in softness and shadows. He waited patiently as if he knew something had shifted between them and he didn’t want any sudden movements to break the odd spell.

Then her stomach growled again, angry at the promise of food being delayed while she gawked at the man who was determined to rescue her in every imaginable way.

“And dinner, of course.”

“Of course,” she whispered, taking care not to make contact with his body as she slid into the seat. She was glad the door was already closed when she left out a huff of air. Good thing she had sworn off love or she may be in some danger.

@teamhook @kmomof4 @jrob64 @stahlop @motherkatereloyshipper @xarandomdreamx @xsajx @klynn-stormz

[songofsaraneth]

an incomplete list of the Bullshit ive gone through this year (2021 only), for personal edification:

I am in grad school trying to do research as well as TA a lab class during a global pandemic

My car is broken into in late February outside of my apartment. $1700+ of my backpacking/camping gear and personal items were stolen from it. Ironically they did not find the $20 cash I had. 

Car battery begins mysterious dying if left overnight and have to call for rescue from AAA 4 separate times over the course of March. I suspect it is related to being broken into but can’t prove it without a mechanic’s diagnostics.

First mechanic I bring my car to does nothing for the entire MONTH they have it, except break my air conditioning of all things. I live in a desert. It is now 90º every day. At one point they call me to say they can’t get the back doors to open. I walk 2 miles back to them from campus and demonstrate how the automatic doors work on a 2005 minivan. I begin to have regrets about my mechanic choice but the sunk fallacy cost keeps me there for several weeks.

Mid march I also wake up one day to severe jaw pain/a weird “loose” feeling, like my mouth is slanting sideways. It is midterms and I do not have time for this, so I take a lot of ibuprofen and eat soup for a week. After 3 days I shove pillows and blankets around my face one night to keep my jaw aligned and when I wake up the next morning it is severely tight instead of loose, and I have to carefully stretch it open whenever I leave my mouth closed for more than an hour. I guess I just have TMJ now.

At this point I am walking everywhere until bike supplies arrive to fix my flat tire since the bike store is too far away to walk to; including walking back and forth to campus since I can only bring 2-4 out of 8 students into the lab spaces at a time and so effectively have to run each weekly lab 2-4 times per week; as well as going back and forth for greenhouse experiment monitoring/helping undergrads on our NASA contest project

Early April I go to the dentist for a crown on one of my back molars, which I must pay for out of pocket because my new dental insurance purchased when I moved last September has a 1-year waiting period and so will not cover it ($1200). Stretching my jaw open so far for the procedure reignites my new TMJ back to high pain levels.

While still waiting on car in mid-April I have a severe averse reaction to the second dose of the Covid19 vaccine, resulting in painful ulceration of all the soft tissues in my body (mouth, stomach, genitals). It is a very bad time for 3 days and I book an urgent care appointment for the first time ever.

Urgent Care nurse-practitioner does not believe me when I describe what’s happening, and misdiagnoses me with herpes.

I am still biking everywhere but now I’m extra mad and in pain about it so take car back from mechanic so I can get groceries etc. I make an appointment with the dealership but it will be a week until they can take it. In the meanwhile I have to drive it every 8 hours so it won’t die which means getting up at 2am to drive it for 20 minutes in the middle of the night so it will still turn on in the morning. 

I have a terrible reaction to the numbing cream given to me for the painful open sores over my body, because of a lifelong mint sensitivity, resulting in an even greater amount of pain

The dealership can fix my car over the following week but its $1800 and now insurance isn’t sure they want to cover it after all

Herpes test comes back negative and nurse apologizes profusely and recommends a non-mint OTC numbing cream alternative that works (yay) and a numbing spray that does not work because it turned out to use an alcohol based propellant which should not be combined with open wounds esp on the genitals (ouch ouch ouch). I try to tell the nurse why I was right about my diagnosis and she was wrong but she still believes it was a latent virus of some other variety and and not an immune response alone, despite the published case studies I have brought to back me up. I decide I have bigger hills I need to die on right now and stop arguing. Sores persist into May but eventually do go down and numbing cream keeps me moderately functioning.

Car is fixed and I can drive again but it takes 2 hours of crying on the phone to my insurance company for them to agree to cover the cost of repair

I make a primary care appointment for the first time in years so I can have a doctor in this state if something like this happens to me again, in June I do intake/bloodwork/set up appointments to check out some other issues ive been having

Grad school finals happen which i wont get into but Yeah. Finals stress triggers another outbreak of canker sores, but mostly clustered in my mouth and only 2 on my vulva rather than 8-12. I eat only soup for another week. 

I get a referral to the local mental health clinic and call about setting up an appointment for an ADHD evaluation. They tell me to download and send in some paperwork and they will call when they have available appointments

I am supposed to be doing all my labwork over the summer but the committee member I need escapes my clutches and we don’t manage to set up a meeting to plan it out/for him to explain the protocols until late June

Bloodwork shows I am critically low in vitamin b12 and low in D, which may explain some of why I am so tired all the time

Ultrasound shows a 1.8cm mass in the adnexa near my left ovary. There are several options for what it can be (folicular cyst, other kind of cyst, tumor, ectopic pregnancy i nearly laugh at my Dr and reassure her the last one is not possible if nothing else). It may go away on its own or it may not. Follow up scan in 2 months

I remember I was supposed to email forms to the mental health clinic and finally send those in mid July. It seems cruel to make me be the one to remember this considering I am calling about a formal ADHD diagnosis.

I also finally pin everyone relating to my labwork down and have a follow up meeting + make a list of what we need to order, but the staff who place orders are on vacation and when they get back several reagents are backordered

I have my follow-up ultrasound. The tech takes lots of photos which indicates the mass is still present, but I won’t know any details until my next PCP appointment when they send over the analysis to her in mid-August

Beginning of August the reagents I need for the first steps of the process arrive exactly 1 day before I leave town for a wedding and the lab manager is about to leave town for the entire next week

After the wedding, severe thunderstorms and tornados trap me in Chicago for 4 extra days. I spend a lot of time at the airport or on my way between the airport and my parents house. A facebook friend gets video of the funnel clouds which at least gives me something to sadly email my advisor and committee members when I have to join our planning meeting from my gate at O’Hare

I lose my drivers license at the security checkpoint on my last trip through the airport and don’t realize until I am boarding the plane because of course that is happening to me now

On the shuttle from El Paso back to Las Cruces after this ordeal the driver stops and picks up a box labeled HUMAN BLOOD and puts it in the trunk and i am too tired to care anymore

I stay up all night making the world’s most pitiful r graphs for my meeting the next morning and everyone takes pity on me and does not call out how useless they are

I spend the weekend trying to motivate myself to actually go into the lab and start my procedures, and fail to leave my apartment. This reminds me it has now been a month (Aug 15th) since I sent in my paperwork and the mental health clinic has still not called me back about up an appointment

I get overwhelmed with Everything and make this list

So that’s where I’m at at the moment. And this doesn’t even include anything from 2020 thats just been continuous like, y’know, a global pandemic and having a bad breakup of a 4 year relationship and moving to a new city where I know no one for grad school etc. I feel like I’m falling apart/unable to do all the shit I need to right now but you know what? Actually its been a really bad time and maybe falling apart a little is justified ;_;