#cant believe they arent more popular they are so cute

[civetside]

i feel the same way about overwatch now too man, im an og fan and while playing is still a fun experience blizzard is so fucked as a company i dont want to promote or monetize their game. anyway weird side tangent what IS a civet

FRFR it's actually so sad, i really tried not to let it effect the way i enjoy the actually well made universe and characters but i can only do so much before i break lmao

but anyways thanks for asking!! civets are my favorite animal! african civets specifically, they are so beautiful and cute, what lil guys, love them, so underrated

[makowo]

if youre still doing the ship thing, three ship opinions: kamuegi, sakuaoi, and kaede/shuichi

KAMUEGI LOVE OF MY LIFE <3 they have so fucking much to them i cant believe they arent more popular. they're total opposites in their actions and beliefs and personalities, yet hold so much in common, as both ultimate hopes saddled with the weight of the world, and as victims of the talent system, particularly in its belittlement of anyone which supposedly lacks one. similar roots yet they stand on opposite sides. if there's anyone that can understand each other, it's them.

sakuraoi is cute! awesome lesbian moments that could easily destroy anyone. i think they're awesome but im not one to actively seek content of them

sucks! bad!! i get the comparisons to naegiri but tbh, kaimaki takes the place of "naegiri but bad" in my book for many reasons, including the fact that shuichi could not be in the place of kyoko or makoto in this dynamic. i really just think kaede deserves much better than shuichi.

[panthershuri]

I want someone else's take on this (feel free to ignore) but why do you think gwen is white and not like black or latina or sumn bc they said we can't have black spidey but now we have miles and even mj isn't white in mcu (zendaya)...why do you think they still kept gwen white in itsv/atsv? I spoke ab it w a friend and we agreed they just don't wanna see a black power couple on the big screen lmao 💀 like even w zendaya she still got paired with Tom Holland and obviously miles is supposed to end up w spider gwen probably...like couldn't they find a universe where she's black?? Like all them spidey mfs in the spider society and not ONE colored gwen?? I find it hard to believe honestly 😪

that’s interesting i didnt think about that. the way i see it like peter parker is always gonna be white and/or jewish but other spider ppl can be anything because they arent peter. i think gwen operates on the same rules so shes always going to be white. and also remember mcu mj is not mary-jane shes a whole different character named michelle who happens to go by mj. and ned is result of them stealing ganke from miles story and putting him in the role of ned from the comics. characters like peter gwen and mj are always gonna be white. miles is the result of asking what if spider man was black and the backlash that would come with that. (cant just make peter parker black. can have more than one spidey tho.)

i might be the only fan with this opinion but i didnt really mind or care that miles had a crush on gwen because it was clearly established in the first movie and also this movie was for kids. that being said i hated it after we learned that gwen betrayed him so awfully like if they try to repair that relationship theyre wrong and dumb im swinging like WTF. (side note peter b also doesnt deserve forgiveness either)

that being said he was feeling spider byte and they would be cute together. if i engaged in spiderverse fanfic id be partial to them. i also hope her appearance in this movie makes ppl more interested in her character. also in the comics miles has black love interests. he even has a version of black cat! maybe they didnt wanna see a black couple but also ghost spider or spider gwen was a more popular character than miles love interests unfortunately.

[minilpark]

“I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself.” G.I. Jane.

Hangman head canon - reader special forces? If he can have an exciting job, why can’t she?

alright forgive me for my limited knowledge on special forces, i didn't write specifics on it because i don't want it to be inaccurate but hangman gets the point

honestly you of all people shouldve known not get involved with men in the military

i mean hell you know how it is with your job yourself

away from home, basically living on whatever base you've been transferred to, making friends with your coworkers, only to eventually lose them on some mission...

life in special forces was tough and yet, you still stuck around

despite the hardships, you found it exciting and there's nothing better than actually enjoying your job right?

sometimes though, you wished that you could settle down with someone

but you believed it would happen in the distant future

oh how you were so wrong

you eventually found yourself stationed at a base in miramar for the time being

during downtime, a couple friends of yours dragged you down to a bar in the area because you need to "let loose and relax once in a while y/n"

the hard deck as it's called

as soon as you walked in you knew what would go down

apparently it's a popular bar for the navy as you could see most of the patrons in uniform

you and your friends ordered a couple drinks and sat at the bar just having random conversations

until one of your buddies nudged your shoulder and whispered "hey, cute guy at 4 o'clock has been eyeing you since you walked in"

you smirked a bit and took a swig of beer mumbling back about how you knew because you could feel the stare

you decided to play a little with him and look just over your shoulder to make eye contact

he raised an eyebrow at you and smirks back

eventually he makes his way over to you at the bar

"hey there, sweetheart. how bout i buy you a drink?"

you chuckle a little and look over at him "i dont even know your first name lieutenant seresin"

at this point he's intrigued

"name's jake, but people call me hangman"

and this is how it started

honestly you never really planned on falling for him, but after a couple hookups it was inevitable

eventually you explained the reason why you were there to him and he kinda took that as a shock

however, before you both could have an actual talk about your feelings for each other, you were assigned on a mission

you let jake know that you had to leave later that night, 0100 hours

despite you two not even dating, hangman lost his cool

"i don't know if i can do this anymore"

"do what jake?"

"don't play stupid, this, relationship we have with each other"

"woah seresin we arent even-"

"thats the point im trying to make y/n! i dont think i can handle the thought of waiting for you to come back or not before i can tell you how i feel!"

you just take a step back trying to process whats going on

"you know what, youre such a fucking hypocrite lieutenant."

before he can even open his mouth to respond, you cut him off

"how is it fair that you can go on whatever fucking mission youre assigned to and expect me to wait here for you worried if you'll even come back or not, but i can't do the same?! i love you but do you think its fair for you to have your dream fucking job and i can't?"

now he's at a loss of words

"if you can't handle my job, then yeah maybe we aren't right for each other."

as youre on your way out the door, jake wordlessly grabs your hand and pulls you into a tight hug

he whispers quietly about how hes sorry he made you feel this way but he cant stand to let you walk out of his life completely

"so where do that leave us then?"

"well, i guess that means you're stuck with me as i am with you. you did say you were in love with me, don't think i didn't notice"

you roll your eyes and point out "i recall you saying first you had feelings for me, seresin."

"aw just shut up-" and he seals the deal with the sweetest kiss

eventually things get more heated before you get ready to leave

and as youre walking out the door you glance behind you and jake is standing there

"i'll see you when i get back okay? love you"

and he smiles while watching you drive off to base whispering an "i love you too" back

[baeshijima]

Discovered your streamer au and sjjdjejw im in love with it its so cute and wholesome but i see albedo getting so much love what abt the others cmon

Like i cant believe there arent more characters like streamer!Scaramouche would be like those streamers who are really pro gamers but rage and hurl toxic insults a lot when frustrated but thats the reason why they are so popular. Then he gets in genshin starts insulting everyone (condescending) and… insult his fav character (endearing).

Streamer!Kaeya does a lot of voice acting in games and also has trolled as the voice of characters he voices in game and hes a kinda decent gamer. He has too many simps lmao. Flirts a lot but only gives the lovesick look to his fav character in genshin. Def hits up with their voice actor early on and thats why mihoyo gave them the wedding skins :pppp Mains his own characters (and fav character cus shipp) when he can cus its funny.

Diluc occasionally gets dragged into Kaeya’s streams and he gets super annoyed oof cus its nothing to do with him like bruh stop hes got his own shit to do. I see Diluc would be in the food/drinks part of twitch cus he is a bartender and mixes drinks. Can see him also being a food/drink connoisseur esp wine. Doesnt ever get into gaming lol cant do shit but u bet he gets into genshin only because he fell head over heels in love with fav character (and happened on kaeya’s streams too uwu). Blushy boi emotes then happens a lot lmao. Def gets teased by Kaeya (and gifted a body pillow. Actually now Im wondering abt all streamers getting body pillows of fav character dijdjejd)

Streamer!Aether and Lumine who both are gamer twins lmao with Aether the completionist, taking his time type and loves lore while Lumine the speedrunner, really skilled with gaming and does op shit. (Since in-game its canon that when the twins fight tgt Lumine is more aggressive and Aether is more defensive) Aether is one of those who makes complete walkthroughs of any games while Lumine has too many funny/insane pog compilations. Both main same fav character but use them different which has them arguing who uses them better which devolves to whos the better match lmao. Def one up each other when it comes to getting fav character in their banners hehe.

Streamer!Kazuha being those polite and wholesome traveler that explores places from all over the world. I can see him bringing attention to each local specialities by praising them and streaming it live. Sometimes streams games, particularly indie ones, he particularly enjoys whenever he has the wifi/connection available. Also a lore person and I can see him maining a fav character because of their personality and complex bg. Hes just soft for them sjdjdjjds

Streamer!Heizhou who games as well tho its mostly either puzzle/strategy heavy games or games with lots of interesting lore and mystery or both :3 Usually does incredibly out of the box yet genius tactics or solving that has ppl meme abt him being 100000iq. Also somehow accurately guesses the plot/answer most of the time. I can see him loving all the puzzle/riddles gameplay and lore in genshin. THEORYCRAFTER AS WELL. Another one who would be into fav character for personality and lore. Also is it weird that i see him potentially being like game theory channel?

Streamer bennett feels bad lmao I can see him being like a young boy streamer playing many games but whos well known for insanely bad luck. We talking like gacha games being utter crap experience, getting the weirdest af glitches that no one else gets, talks abt his encounters in life that make everyone go wow thats very very unlucky. Might be seen as annoying to some but his audiences find him endearing and support him :((( awww. His fav character is likely his emotional support character. (I add bennett here because hes one of the ones I really like and feel like he needs more love. Platonically of course)

Ok yea these are my ideas feel free to add on or disagree with any of them cus your post literally inspired me ajjdjdjjdjxjds sad I cant ask this as my alt blog trashcanfills my fandom blog cus tumblr sucks :/ but ah well

take it. take the series, the au and my money /lh

NO BUT I AGREE 10000000% ON UR HCS !!!!! PLS AETHER WOULD BE THE ONE TO GIVE CHARACTER BUILD GUIDS AND LUMINE DOING SOLO BOSS SPEEDRUNS OR SMTH 😭AND HEIZOU WOULD GO ON SUCH LONG TANGENTS ABOUT WHY HIS THEORY IS CORRECT AND DEBUNK EVERY OTHER THEORY 😭😭 bennett would just be made into a meme where if someone has bad gacha luck, they would mention how they pulled a bannett :((

kazuha the indie gamer so true !!! he would be so supportive of the smaller creators and promote their games so well his community already get the game once they see the title before he even plays 😩 scaramouche also gets made into memes like in .exe vids when they show a funny moment/low numbers and then hes just there. raging. screaming. flipping a table.

VA KAEYA SO TRUE SO TRUEEEE if he has voiced a playable character, he would create a separate party for him and character!reader with the team called “lovers shalala” aND YES !!! DILUC WOULD BE THE KING OF THE FOOD AND DRINK CATEGORY !! ngl its mainly bc he makes jabs at alcoholics while promoting the benefits of fruit juice and how its “like drinking without getting drunk”. blushy diluc emotes so true so true *bangs fist on table*

[imagines-mha]

◇ Haikyuu on Tinder ◇

Daichi: so BORING. His pictures are all from the same awkward selfie angle and no matter what you ask him he gives you dull answers. “What are you up to?” “just sitting here : ) what about you?”

Suga: only goes on tinder when he needs validation cus he knows hes hot but in NO WAY is he ready to commit yet and he understands noone on tinder ever really is so he never feels guilty for it

Noya: uses the picture of him with the fish 🤢. Flirts like his life depends on it, but that doesnt mean hes good. “Woah you’re real???”. if you give him a chance his true personality rlly does come thru

Tanaka: makes parties his only personality trait. Always “on it” as he says, but like,,, what does tht mean get a hobby. Also hits you with the “holy shit you’re gorgeous , how come ive never seen you before? ;))” good for validation

Ennoshita: HES SO BAD AT FLIRTING. He’ll hit you up like “hi : )” and then proceed to have the dryest convo youve ever had in your life. Tells you nothing about himself and doesnt even try to save it when it falls flat

Tsukishima: definitely puts smth like “dont text me if you cant handle my complex mind and sarcastic humour” and definitely gaslights you.

Yamaguchi: he gets WAY TOO SHY and makes noya and tanaka do it all for him. Never really uses it unless he’s having a breakdown about his love life

Yachi: she uses it for validation like suga only refuses to admit that she does. Super popular on it cus of how cute she dresses but shes too nervous to text anyone back

Kuroo: spends all his time talking to milfs and loses every inch of his dignity when someone asks to see his tinder profile

Kenma: nekoma tried to pay him to make tinder once and he refused, saying he would never sink that low. he actually downloaded it once and deleted it 15 minutes after incase anyone he knew found it

Lev: asks you if you have snapchat immediately. It’s a trap. He’ll definitely spam you every single day with “how are you today” “what are you doing rn”. Its sweet at first but when you wake up one morning with 54 unread messages from a tinder dude, you know its time to block

Oikawa: gets it when his girlfriend breaks up with him solely to prove to himself he’s loveable but nothing works out because he NEVER messages back.

Iwa- gets it when hes bored and he’s GORGEOUS but talks about the gym way too muh in his bio like we get it you work out find another personality trait. Also can’t flirt

Makki: his bios been “taking a year off to live my life to the fullest and figure out my next big move” for 5 years straight

Kunimi- mattsun and makki set up a tinder for him as a joke and tried to make it as dark and emo as possible. “Welcome to my twisted mine” Hes surprisingly more popular on it than both of them combined

Futakuchi: hes so BEAUTIFUL and everyone swipes for him. Unfortunately he knows he’s so beautiful and swipes for literally noone because he doesnt believe anyones good enough for him

Bokuto: yeah hes a sweetiepie the second you message him. Seems so pure and honest and HE ISSS. “heyheyhey how are you doing wanna see a picture of a cat i saw today???” SO MUCH ENERGY IN HIS TEXTS and hes so funny too. mwah!!! ✨���

Akaashi: his bio is “my friends made me make this” but all his pictures point to the evidence that actually, he himself made it, because noone puts that much effort into a bio they didnt want sorry babie

Konoha: pretends he’s a judge on americas next top model and everyone on tinder are the candidates. Never actually talks to people

Ushijima: he has one tinder picture and its just a zoomed up picture half of his face. His bio just says “hello” because he doesnt know wtf hes doing. shiratorizawa’s favourite inside joke

Tendou: definitely has it ironically. All of his pictures are so cryptically edited to the point of no return. “Looking for a queen to send all my memes to”

Semi: he KNOWS how to work tinder. Pictures of his guitar, vinyls, aesthetic pics of him taken at night, the smoothest bio in the game. Only uses it to spread his music. Definitely a pretentious musician but one that EVERYONE wants to hear

Goshiki: “text me first im shy” um what x

Kita: he’s so normal and honestly way too good for tinder. A horrible flirt, really, but its endearing how much he tries. Texts only one person at a time and has trust in everyone so immediately assumes they arent texting anyone else either

Atsumu: “MSBY black jackals 🤩 Wasting no time on anything but the grind 💪🏻 dont swipe if you cant keep up 😤” probably banned for life

Osamu: sends “you up?” texts ALL THE DAMN TIME LIKE OSAMU ITS 6PM OFC IM UP

Suna- hes CLEARLY here to fuck- no more no less. It aint no dating app to him and if you misinterpret all his mixed signals hes definitely gonna make you feel like a desperate idiot and ghost you. Will ruin ur self esteem.

Terushima: the tinder fuckboy. You just KNOW he has tinder and uses it religiously, and honestly- youve probably hooked up before cus he knows how to flirt good

[nctzenluvies]

HIS PARTY

𝖏𝖊𝖔𝖓𝖌 𝖏𝖆𝖊𝖍𝖞𝖚𝖓 𝖝 𝖋. 𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗

𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖉𝖘 : 1.7k

𝖒𝖆𝖐𝖎𝖓𝖌 𝖔𝖚𝖙 , 𝖈𝖚𝖗𝖘𝖎𝖓𝖌 , 𝖉𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖐𝖎𝖓𝖌 , 𝖜𝖊𝖊𝖉 , 𝖘𝖒𝖚𝖙 , 𝖉𝖊𝖌𝖗𝖆𝖉𝖎𝖓𝖌 , 𝖗𝖆𝖜 𝖘𝖊𝖝

~~~~~~~~~~

you were walking outside of the school and of course, it was a friday, meaning everyone was getting their invites to the popular kids "frat party". all you knew about the parties, is that they consisted of drinking, weed, and apparently drugs too. you genuinely didnt expect for anyone invite you.

"hey, y/n!" someone said behind you.

"hi?"

"remember? its me, cay!"

"oh yeah! hi! whats up?"

"well, i got permission to invite some people to this weekends party, and we had a few extra slots so, i thought to invite you!"

"oh? sure, i can go.. but when is it?"

"tomorrow night, i can text you the address, your number is still the same right?"

"yeah, it is. thanks so much!"

"of course, do you need a ride?"

"no thanks, ill have my friend drop me off."

cay walked away and went to the back of the school as you got into the bus and sat next to one of your friends, that happened to also be invited to tomorrows party.

after about 10 minutes, the bus had finally made it to you and your friends neighborhood. you got off the bus, said your goodbyes to your friend and walked home. once you got home, you went up to your room and unpacked your things.

"dude, i cant believe we both got invited to that tomorrow." your friend said on the phone.

"i know! should we make outfits?"

"uh.. yess?!"

the two of you made outfits and got opinions from one another. your friend had to hang up because their mom called them, so you just decided to make a list of stuff you needed to bring.

"gum... chapstick, tissues? do i need that?"

you threw what you could pack now into your bag, and got pajamas to go take a shower.

you took a quick shower, and went down to your kitchen to make food. you made something simple with what you had in your fridge. after eating, you watched netflix for an hour or two, then went to your room to sleep.

~~~~~

𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓅.. 𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓅.. 𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓅..

your alarm went off, it was 10 in the morning. you got up, and got ready in a comfy outfit for the day. you had planned to spend a few hours with your cousins at the mall, then go home and get ready for the party.

your cousin picked you up, you guys went do the mall, got coffees, ate food, and shopped around for 3 hours.

your friend was at a store nearby, so she went to come pick you up.

"hey! did you have fun?" she asked.

"yeah, i got a bunch of stuff haha."

"thats good! you could use something for tonight!"

"true, is that what youre wearing tonight?"

"no, i just went to the shop to get groceries, so of course not."

"thats what i thought."

you two blasted music on the way back to her house. you got there, helped he put the groceries away, and walked back to your house. you just chilled for about an hour before getting ready.

you hopped out of the shower, and called your friend.

"hey, y/n. whats up?" cay answered.

"nothing, i just wanted to ask if there was a specific timing we needed to be there?"

"nope, you just have to be there by nine."

"oh alright. see ya!"

you dried you hair, and got a cute dress your cousin had bought you at the mall. you were packing a bag and your best friend called you.

"hey y/bsf/n, why you callin me?"

"nothing, i just wanted to let you know im leaving soon. so get your bag ready."

"will do."

you finished packing, got a water bottle, went to the bathroom, and walked out to see y/bsf/n waiting in her car out-front of your house.

"hey bitch! get in, lets go!"

the two of you headed out, screaming about each others outfits.

you pulled into a huge driveway leading up to a mansion. of course, the popular kids cars were pulling in as you parked.

"oh hey y/n!" cay said behind you.

"hey!"

"well, welcome i guess? let me show you around."

he showed you around his friends house, as someone caught your eye.

you pointed towards some really cute guy in the corner, "hey cay, who is that?"

"oh him? thats jaehyun, hes one of my best friends."

"ok, thanks."

"no problem.

you and your friend walked away to get a drink from the bar they had.

"girllll you have good eyes." your friend teased.

"what do you mean?"

"that jaehyun dude was cute."

"i know right."

"you should go talk to him! your hot, hes hot, perfect relationship!"

"fine, i will. be right back."

"ok, ill be over here!"

you walked over to the boy you had been looking at for a bit and said hi.

"hey, thought i just let you know i think your hot." you winked, walking away.

he twirled you back around, "well, i would say those feelings are mutual then."

"oh? show me then."

"with pleasure."

he pulled you upstairs to a room somewhere in the back of the house, and locked the door behind him.

it was dark in the room, so you couldnt exactly see him, but when he turned the lights up, he was already completely naked. he had the best abs youd seen in a while. man did you get the worst butterflies. he got on top of you, and tore your clothes.

"your a little slut, arent you."

"maybe."

he snickered, kissing your jawline, going down to your stomach. he threw your legs to the side, kissing the inside of your thighs. he threw your legs on his shoulder, giving you kitten licks, teasing you. jaehyun let go of your legs to say something.

"i never got your name, sweetheart."

"y/n."

"y/n?"

"yup."

"cute."

he continued his teasing, but gave you zero warning that he was going to actually eat you out.

"jaehyun!"

"mhm?" he said, sending a wave of vibrations through your body, causing you to almost moan.

after a bit, he let go of your pussy, "moan loader baby." so of course, you did. the more noise you made, the more he smirked probably thinking you couldnt feel it. at some point he started using his tongue way more aggressively, so you grabbed his head pushing him deeper in your folds.

he suddenly let go, looking straight in your eyes.

"you cant cum yet. your turn."

he got to the side of the bed, pulled you closer to him, and shoved his dick straight in your mouth. beside gagging at first, you did your job perfectly by how he was reacting.

he pushed you down away from him, and got back on top of you.

"youre going to listen to daddy, right?"

you nodded.

"you will stay completely silent until i say so."

he lined his cock up with your core and slammed straight in you, filling you up. he immediately went in and out of you, leading to you making a bunch of noise. he put a hand around your neck to shut you up.

"you stay quiet, remember?"

you nodded, trying your best to stay quiet. there was a bunch of people coming up the stairs, probably looking for jaehyun.

"jaehyun?" one of his friends yelled from the end of the hallway.

what sounded like two people came up to the door, stopped and listened. you held your breath, but jaehyun on the other hand just continued.

"oh shit, hes blowing someones back out."

"yeah, already? the party just started. i wonder who it is." your friend cay said.

"dude. lets go ask around and see who were missing."

"yeah."

𝑜𝒽 𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓉 , you thought to yourself. jay was going to figure out that your were being gut-fucked by his best friend, let alone, one of the most popular people in the building.

luckily as soon as your best friend heard people we're asking around, she texted you saying she'd be at the back of the house so she wouldn't get found out.

"oh shit!" you screamed.

the two of you reached your highs about the same time. all you felt was this warm liquid filling you up like crazy. he pulled out, picked you up and brought you to the bathroom. luckily he had brought you to bedroom that had a bathroom.

he cleaned you up first, cleaned himself up, and got you both dressed. jaehyun dragged you out of the bedroom, telling you to go to the back of the house after seeing your phone text message.

you ran down stairs, out the front door and saw your friend right on the side of the house.

"hey!" she yelled

"hi."

"so, how was it?"

"good, hes so hot oh my god."

"well, look who it is."

"hello, im jaehyun, y/n's new boyfriend."

you looked at him, confused.

"wait, wait, we never agreed to that." you sighed.

"we did now."

"ok, ill leave you guys alone, good bye." your friend ran back into the house.

"jaehyun, really?"

"what."

"ive known you for like fifteen minutes."

"a good fifteen minutes." he winked.

"jaehyun!"

you turned around to see cay yelling for jaehyun.

"hi?"

"im going to go over there." you whispered, pointing to the fence of the property.

"well, who was it?"

"who was what?"

"ya know, the chick you had in the room." cay said.

"oh, that? her." he pointed to you, causing you to look up.

"fucking seriously? ive been friends with her for a while and she never has hooked up with someone like you man."

"well i guess you can say hook up if you want."

"huh?"

jaehyun signaled you to come back over.

he wrapped his hand around your waist, "this is my girlfriend."

"uh, what? im so confused. havent you known each other for like 30 minutes?"

"yeah, but shes hot."

"alright, ive never seen that happen."

cay walked away, leaving the two of you to walk in together. you and jaehyun just drank all night, and went back to your house, eating and watching movies.

𝔞/𝔫: 𝔦 𝔨𝔫𝔬𝔴 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔰 𝔰𝔲𝔠𝔨𝔰 𝔞𝔰𝔰 𝔦𝔪 𝔟𝔬𝔯𝔢𝔡 𝔰𝔬 𝔦 𝔴𝔯𝔬𝔱𝔢 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔰 :)

[nikrangdan]

cafeworker!ni-ki

pairing: cafeworker!ni-ki x female reader

genre: fluff, comedy

description: the cashier at the new coffee shop was so adorable you just couldn’t resist visiting just for him

**did not proofread

————

contrary to popular belief, you were NOT a social person

whenever you were around friends and family, you were always the loudest person there

like SHUT UP Y/N!!!!!!

anyways although you were loud, people still enjoyed being around you because you had such a sweet soul and interesting humor

everyone close to you knew that you hated talking to people you didnt know

but to all the strangers? no

they would think you were an outgoing ready-to-meet-new-people extrovert

which was so, so wrong

but ALAS, you had to talk strangers almost everyday living in 2020

(well lets pretend we arent in the middle of a pandemic right now)

moving on......

so you were in high school at the downfall of your existence

you used to have so many friends when you were younger ..now you only have like 3

and those three were always busy (busy making up excuses thats for sure) so you never really hung out with them outside of school

and on one fine evening after school you decided to visit the new cafe 5 minutes from your house

u were really excited because all the cafes were 15 minutes from your house so now u could just walk to this one if u wanted to !!!

but yeah it was in the middle of a small plaza that had cute buildings

you pulled up to the parking lot and was just about to get out the car when u remembered..

u have to talk to the cashier :/

who’s a stranger! even more ://

it was always so weird to you.. whenever you went out you always had someone else order for you because you just hated talking to strangers

you just felt uncomfortable and you couldnt help it

its not like you have never ordered for yourself but you would always prefer not to

and now that you think about it

this is the first time you have gone out by yourself

you did text one of your friends beforehand but they said they “had homework to do”

LIES!!!!

but you really wanted to try the coffee so you just ran with it

time to face your fears!

you opened the glass door to reveal a cute looking cafe, like the ones you’d see in movies

you loved it already

glancing to the cashier you’d have to be talking to—

hold on

you had to do a double take because WOAH.....

the cashier...

he....

wow..

you have never seen a boy like that in your life

you stood there for like 3 seconds before coming to your senses and standing infront of the menu

that was infrONT OF HIM

“hi, what can i get for you?”

HIS VOICE OH MY GOD..!?!?!

“oh um.. can i get a second to .. look..?”

“yeah of course,” he gestured to the menu on the wall above him

hes so nice u almost cried

your eyes shakily traveled up to the chalkboard menu and u began to ‘read’ the options

its like u could feel his eyes on u WTF!!!!

um um um *internally keyboard smashes*

you couldnt even think

the words on the menu were like gibberish

the ONE time u go out by yourself

this had to happen.. of course! someone had it out for you, you were sure of it >:(

picking a random drink you gave him your order

“uh can i have an iced caramel macchiato?”

ITS LIKE YOU CANT SAY A SENTENCE WITHOUT UH OR UM

u cant help but think hes judging you

he looks like that while u are standing there in old sweatpants your dads tshirt

“sure, what size?” he looks into your eyes after putting your order into the machine

god you felt your heart stop

his Eyes..... theyre so beautiful

“oh um regular” you attempted to give a small smile

hopefully it looked like one

“okay that’ll be $5.12.”

you dug out some cash from your bag and handed it to him

he gave u your change and gave u a small smile

“your drink will be out in a minute”

AAAAA

he went :)

he is so CUTE.....?!?!

he looked around your age too

sigh... you knew he was way out of your league though

you were gushing over him but he probably thought you were just another boring customer

while waiting u sat at one of the 2 person tables on your phone

and u IMMEDIATELY went to text your groupchat

‘GUYS’

‘AT THE CAFE NEAR MY HOUSE’

‘CUTEST BOY IVE EVER SEEN EVER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE’

‘WTF IM GONNA CRY HOW DOES HE EXIST’

‘WAIT BRB HE S COMIBBG’

you tried to quickly put your phone down without looking suspicious when you saw him walking towards you with a drink in his hand

“here you go, enjoy” he said before swiftly making his way back to the counter and talking to the other worker there

wow... hes so mesmerizing

you’d steal glances at him every now and then while taking sips of your drink

you were sitting there for like 20 minutes before you noticed you finished your drink

you totally forgot you came here to see how good their coffee was

it was good by the way

sadly it was your time to leave

taking one last glance at him, you threw away your empty cup and walked out the door

wow

u cant believe you got to witness the most beautiful human being ever

in your small town?? crazy

you were sitting in your car just thinking

WAIT

U DIDNT EVEN KNOW HIS NAME!

you mentally punched yourself but then you started laughing

what does knowing his name even matter, its not like u were ever going to talk to him anyway

LOL

*sad emoji*

but the coffee was good so you definitely planned to go back

and not just because of the cute boy

...unless....

*time skip*

the next day you went there was a week later at the same time in hopes that he was working the same shift

AND HE WAS!!!!

score! 1 for y/n, 0 for umm... any other person who had a crush on him too i guess

the cafe didnt have too many people since it was fairly new and also in a small part of the city

so when you went in, you were the only one there along with the two workers

“welcome, what would you like to order?”

NOT THIS AGAIN

he looked even cuter today

his messy blond hair almost covered his eyes

you shouldve forced your friend to come with you this time

you ordered the same thing as last time but this time he asked for your name

hmmm

“um y/n” you answered

your heart was always beating 2 times as fast whenever you had to talk to him

he wrote it down on the cup and after you paid, you went to sit down at the same spot as last time

looking at him is literally the highlight of your day

the same thing happened as last time, he came over and gave you your drink without giving u a second glance

>:((((

boooo look at me cute boy

nonetheless u continued going to the cafe at the same time as much as u could which was like three times a week

literally over a month later and u dont think anythings going to happen

u punch yourself for thinking the boy would somehow find interest in you

hes still indifferent to you which isn’t surprising since you’ve never made any kind of move

ever

but

he should know u by now

hopefully..

*time skip again*

it was a saturday

at this point you’ve basically given up on having a crush on him and now since its become a routine u just say you go for the coffee

not really paying attention to your surroundings you dont notice that the boy at the cash register isnt the normal one you see almost everyday

“hey, what would you like to order?”

woah WHAT

you look up from your bag to notice a boy that was definitely not the one that normally stood infront of it at this time

and you also noticed something on this new cashier

a name tag

how come your old little crush didnt have one????

this new boys name was ‘jay’ and he was fairly cute too

looking around the corner at the other worker u noticed he has a name tag too

you recognized him because he was always working when the cute boy was at the cash register

his name was ‘heeseung’

after taking in these new additions you answered to jay

“oh um.. can i ge-,”

“she gets an iced caramel macchiato. her name is y/n”

??!<_|#%[>~€\£~

you whipped your head around so fast to see who said that behind you

was it who you thought it was ??!??!

YES IT WAS!!!!

OH MYGOD

ITS HIM

you widened your eyes at the boy who wasnt wearing his normal black and white uniform

instead he was wearing black ripped jeans and a gray hoodie

wow....... and u thought he couldnt look any better

BUT OMG?? HE REMEMBERS U

“oh wow ni-ki, you know her?” the boy named jay asked him

“uh yeah.. shes a regular” he said before walking to stand next to you

NI-KI

HIS NAME IS NI-KI OHMHGOD

u thought his name fit him perfectly its so CUTE

“are you gonna get something too?”

this whole time you were silent because.. what is going on

your heart was being SO fast you thought that everyone could hear it

“yup, can i get the same thing? also im paying for both of us”

WHAT??/):)/$;##\%|

ur eyes widened even more it looked like they were gonna pop out of its sockets

u unconsciously leaned towards the boy next you and kind of put your hands up

“w-what?? oh um no, you dont have to do that” you nervously said to him as he looked down at you

he kind of had a smile on his face

“i want to.”

there is no way this is happening

“oiiii ni-ki” jay chuckled while punching in numbers on the cash register

“ill have both of your drinks out soon, you two kids have fun!” jay said before turning around to face heeseung

WHAT??!!??!

your jaw almost dropped from shock

millions of thoughts ran through your brain and you couldnt even process anything

u cant believe this was happening

it was like a wattpad story or something.. is this how u meet ur soulmate

your thoughts were interrupted by a hand on your back momentarily and u look to see ni-ki shyly grinning and gesturing u towards a table

no way...

you awkwardly follow him to a 2 person table next to wall and sit down

you literally could not hear anything except for the pounding of your heart

“uh sorry about that...” he rubbed his neck and sheepishly smiled

“im ni-ki by the way”

“y/n...” u felt so awkward u wanted to cry

“agh, im really sorry if that was weird.. i just didnt know how to ask you out.....” he trailed off

*passes out*

IM JOKING

Ok but u felt ur heart stop bc NO WAY

“wait what??” u ask, ur eyes bigger than the moon

“um yeah... haha i took the day off today to try to talk to you.. sorry if that was weird..”

HE WAS SO AWKWARD JUST LIKE YOU IT WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER

“no its okay!! im glad actually...”

“really? so is it okay if we hang out?” he asked excitedly

u did not think u could handle HOW CUTE THIS BOY WAS O M G...

“of course! sorry if im kind of awkward though” you gave a small smile

“its okay, i think i am too”

you two began talking about the cafe and where you went to school

turns out even though you two lived in the same town (literally 5 minutes away from eachother) u went to different schools for some reason

u talked for like 2 minutes before jay walked up with your drinks

“hows it going guys?”

“its doing good bro, now go away..” ni-ki lightly shoved jay and laughed

you giggled at the sight

jay looked offended and came right back

“that is not how you talk to your elders ni-ki! y/n do you see this?!” he scoffed

ni-ki just rolled his eyes and turned back to you

“do not ignore me young man!” jay joked

“oh y/n, ive heard all about you from ni-ki over here by the way.”

ni-ki’s eyes got so big you almost got worried

he turned around so fast and gave jay one of those ‘i swear if you say anything ur dead meat’ looks

jay obviously did not care

“hes always like ‘y/n this y/n that’ blah blah im glad he finally got the balls to ask you out because im honestly sick of hearing it!” jay laughed

u were blushing so hard

NI-KI LIKED U????

this felt like a dream

ni-ki pushed jay away so hard and turned back with red cheeks

awe

but yeah that was the beginning of the cutest relationship ever

u and ni-ki were so cute together <333

you’d always visit him during ur free time

it took like 2 months before u two made it official tho

and he was the sweetest boyfriend ever

[hello-yue-here]

Yuetara, zukka, and maiko

yuetara

ship

1) its not one of my main ships. i dont rlly read fanfic for them but if i see a cute fanart of them ill enjoy it and i think i first started shipping it because of good fanarts for them.

2) i like yuetara because of how similar they are. theyre both women from the water tribe. they both understand the misogyny that they have faced. and they both said f sexism im gonna be a strong woman. i also love the tui and la parallel. moon spirit and ocean spirit parallel COME ON. YUE IS THE MOON. KATARA IS THE MOST POWERFUL WATERBENDER. THEY ARE THE OCEAN AND THE MOON. the push and pull they could give eachother. that dynamic ftw.

3) i guess if i didnt like something about this ship would be the fact that if i read a fic or see a fanart w yuetara then than means in that particular au i wont get any yuekka and yuekka is probably my second favorite ship. but then again if i get yuetara than i could get a plethora of other sokka ships to go with it so my sadness disappears in like two seconds. gosh shipping is hard sometimes until you remember ‘hey i have like fifty different universes in my head. all ur ships can coexist in ur brain olivia’ other than that i really see no downsides to this ship. maybe i wish it had more content. maybe if it had more content id ship it a lot more but its not one of the more popular ships so the content is kinda few n far between on my feed.

zukka:

SHIPPP

1) my boys. my babies. my loves. i watched this show for the first time when it came out on netflix and when it ended i really didnt ship anything other than kataang. i came onto tumblr to find fun atla content and one of the very first things i saw under the atla tag was zukka content. i was like oh? whats this? zukka? interesting... i was intrigued so i found a list of fic recs and i fell in love with the ship. the rest is history. its probably my number one ship because it was my very first ship here and im nostalgic

2) oh boy there is so much i like about this ship. i relate to a shit ton of characters in atla. but sokka and zuko may be the ones i relate to most. i relate to sokka because i tend to feel second best a lot to my friends. i try to stay positive but things rarely go the way i plan or hope for them too and while im happy for my friends and their achievements i oftentimes find myself thinking why cant that be me? and i see this a lot in sokka especially in sokkas master. i dont feel special a lot and idk seeing sokka feel the same way and then realizing he is special kinda helped me realize that im special too. on the flipside i relate to zuko because i have wild anger issues and difficulty dealing w my emotions a lot as well. i get broody and short tempered and insecure very often and i tend to push people away and i refuse to ask for help (the amount of teachers and adults and therapists who have told me its okay to ask for help ur not any weaker because of it is astounding. do i listen to them? .....im working on it.) and i saw a shit ton of this in zuko. book one and two zuko rarely asks for help as seen in the blue spirit and zuko alone and he pushes away uncle so many times and even when the gaang iffers to help him in i think its the chase he tells them to leave. when he finally has his redemption and joins the gaang and lets them kinda become a better person i was so happy. i want that for myself yk. seeing him finally win the agni kai and overcome his family that always told him he was nothing was such a win. my sister and i get along but when we were children we were very much like zuko and azula. it was extremely competitive all the time and there was so much toxicity and sibling drama to a concerning extent. we get along great now which im very happy about but yeah their sibling relationship hit a lil too on the nose for me. seeing as i relate to these character so much and want them ti be happy i want to live vicariously through them so seeing them together is amazing for me to project into them. i love projecting onto fictional characters and with them i can project onto BOTH so its a winwin. plus so many zukka fics are so well written and heartwarming and heartbreaking and emotional and fluffy anf UGH the talent here us astounding.

3) what do i not like about the ship? again the list is long. oops. mainly the toxic shippers. there are so many toxic zukka stans that sometimes make it hard for me to enjoy this ship but hey! thats what the block button is for:) i despise how often people infantilize zuko and completely ruin his character for the sake of making him a soft weak lil boy who needs protecting. thats just not zuko for me. and ive seen many many accounts even state that this kind of portrayal of zuko is rooted in racist stereotypes about asian men (now i am white so i personally have never experiences racism but i feel the need to bring that up because it is wrong and attention needs to be brought to it because a lot of poc fans have criticised this) and the same for sokka. some ppl rlly skew his character and make him a big strong brute and hypermasculine and once again poc fans have said that this take is rooted in racist stereotypes. again! these are just my opinions! this is my favorite ship! but i think its important to acknowledge some of the bad parts of our ships as well and be critical where criticism is needed :))

maiko

ship

1) I LOVE MAIKO. “i dont hate you” “i dont hate you too” BRUH. my little heart just burst into flames. im sorry guys but maiko is so cute. they hate everything except eachother. BRUH that is one of the cutest tropes. i shipped them the moment i saw them together onscreen and i was so happy when zukos face lit up in the finale when mai came back.

2) “i hate everything but i have a soft spot for you” TAKE MY MONEY I AM A SUCKER FOR THIS. they are so cute together. like zuko is rarely happy in a majority of atla but mai makes him happy and i- 🥺🥺 HE DESERVES IT. and mai is always so supportive of him. when hes stressing out about the war meeting she tries her best to comfort him. and zuko cares about her too. he may not be the best at showing it but oh my god hes TRYING HIS BEST. i think its a very accurate portrayal of teenage relationships because they arent perfect and they do fight but like,, every teenage relationship does that. and even after everything and how he left her in the fire nation she still had his back at boiling rock. she still risked her life against azula to save his butt.

3) the thing i hate about maiko isnt even about maiko. its about antis who think mai is toxic and that zuko deserves better. that has got to be the worst take ive ever heard. they had a fight in ember island. that is NORMAL. they are teenagers. they are not perfect. but underneath all the rough edges and things they need to work out they still care about eachother so freaking much. i genuinelt believe that neither of them would do anything to intentionally hurt the other and i think thats what matters the most. if anything mai is the best girlfriend in the entire world because zuko fucked up like,, quite a few times. he got rlly jealous and dumped her thru a letter and ppl always say that mai was toxic for being mad at him for those two things. umm she had every right to be mad at him for both of those. and while zuko is allowed to feel his emotions and be angry sometimes as well sometimes he needs to think things thru and realize that hey maybe some if this jealousy is unfounded. BUT EVEN THEN. HE RESPECTED HER FEELINGS AND DIDNT TOUCH HER WHEN SHE SAID DONT TOUCH ME. HE RESPECTED HER. so i hate toxic maiko takes because they are literally so wrong in my opinion.

again all of these are just my opinions!! feel free to agree or disagree but please be respectful!! i will respect whatever u think as well because this is all just for fun :)

[seerofmike]

i feel like a huge portion of kpop fans are gay fetishists attracted to the idea of quote unquote feminine men and thats why theres so much bullshit

YES okay. okay let me rant for a minute. let me preface this by saying i am NOT a kpop shipper at ALL. this is going to be long so i’ll put it under a’ ‘read more’ because i’ve been holding it in for TWO FUCKING YEARS BABY!

being mlm in boygroup kpop fandom is literally so exhausting. 99% of the people who ship real life human men from boygroups are fetishists and i will tell u why

obviously we all know of a ship in a fandom where the characters' personalities are twisted to fit the heteronormative view of "top" and "bottom" --one character is hypermasculine (top) and the other one is feminine (bottom). there are typical traits associated with both. the ‘top’ is scary or mean or angry or serious while the ‘bottom’ is emotional or bubbly or shy. while this is egregious, at least its fictional characters. their personalities can be simplified or exaggerated and it doesnt cause any real life harm.

im going to define what i think of as a fetishist: a non-mlm person who overly sexualizes gay men/men they think are gay/gay ships, and forces them into heteronormative roles for their own pleasure. its not even limited to cishet women. plenty of non-mlm lgbt people do this too and its like disheartening. so anyways

enter the kpop fandom

i may be incredibly biased here because one of the most affected members [of bts] is my favorite kpop boy, but oh god is the ‘personality change/simplification’ thing AWFUL here. i do not go out of my way to find fanart or see fanfic threads, but being in the bts fandom, u will inevitably see it and i REALLY wish i didnt

so anyways. my favorite boy ever is hoseok. he is sweet and hardworking and very passionate about dance and he can be serious when needed, but ultimately he tries to be very lighthearted and will consistently laugh or make jokes or do something funny when the other members feel uncomfortable or awkward (mostly during english-speaking interviews). he kisses the members on the cheek a lot/hugs them a lot/cuddles them a lot [this is important for later okay]

of course, theres a lot more to him because he is a multi-faceted real life human being, and i don’t know him personally, but that’s a general idea of what he’s like, okay?

SHIPPERS will have you think differently. some video got popular on youtube ""proving"" that hoseok is a sadist (which is just clips of him jokingly playfighting with the younger members), and the video depicts him as secretly mean and serious, and shippers will use that to say "hoseok is a total top!" and then most fanart or imagines or fanfic threads you see are top!hoseok, using this imagined 'hoseok is a sadistic dom' narrative to fuel their fiction, because SOMEONE has to be the top, so they twist him into this hypermasculine mean person (and probably feminize the 'bottom' of their ship but more on that later)

EXCEPT it is not just fiction. this narrative bleeds into REAL LIFE. you have new armys who dont know anything about the shipping scene, and yet somehow the narrative of hoseok being a secretly mean, sadistic person has already made its way into them. in real life, hoseok likes rainbows and wearing nail stickers and putting glitter in his hair. yet people in the fandom will say shit like "hoseok hates femininity" "hoseok would never wear [thing] because he's a dom"

sometimes on twitter you have ppl like me who say uh actually you guys are really weird and this is fetishy and in real life hoseok is very nice and not sadistic at all, you will UNDOUBTEDLY get comments like "omg hoseok isnt cute/nice when will yall learn he’s secretly like [x] and [x]". you could post a video of hoseok with a puppy titled "wow cute" and u will get like 2 clowns in ur comments going 'hoseok isnt CUTE hes a sadist’ . i wish i was joking but i am not. they will do this for EVERY action hoseok does. he cannot blink without people twisting it into a sexual thing

[also, side note: its funny that, since hoseok is one of the least popular members and therefore one of the least shipped members, he is often the odd man out among pairings, and is assigned 'the straight one' by default, and 9 times out of 10 people who assign him 'the straight one' do all this 'dom daddy hoseok' shit.

which just goes to show that this is indeed a matter of heteronormativity.]

so anyways arguably the most popular ship with hoseok is with yoongi, sope. this absolutely happens to other ships probably but im just using them as an example because i see it the most, being a hobi stan

yoongi is very calm and thoughtful and kind and sometimes appears to be cold/having a bad attitude but its just because of the way he speaks, which is very bluntly. again hes a multi faceted real human and i do not know him personally but thats generally what hes like.

god the fandom. treats him SO BAD. so horribly. he's shorter than hoseok. he's shorter than hoseok and people will exaggerate that literal 1 inch height difference so bad and people will turn his whole personality into shy and blushy and In Love With Hoseok, so in love with hoseok that ‘he gets sad’ when hoseok doesn’t kiss him/hug him/or whatever and IT BLEEDS INTO REAL LIFE.

ANY time hoseok or yoongi do ANYTHING together at ALL, people will ALWAYS push the narrative that hoseok, being the mean sadist he is, is 'hurting' yoongi for not returning his undying love or whatever. hoseok did a vlive where he made bracelets for all the members and he considered putting a cat charm on yoongi's but ultimately decided not to because he was having difficulty and oh my GOD sope stans twisted it into 'hoseok HATES yoongi, yoongi would have been so happy, he would have worn that all the time, hoseok isnt affectionate he hates being close with other people after all :(' which is LITERALLY not true because hoseok gives all his homies good night kisses but okay! whatever fits your narrative!

PEOPLE ACTUALLY HATE HOSEOK BECAUSE OF THIS. BECAUSE OF A SHIP. BECAUSE OF THE MANUFACTURED NARRATIVE PUSHED ONTO HIM BY FETISHISTS SO HE COULD FIT INTO THEIR HETERONORMATIVE ‘TOP’ ROLE. not to be all wahh wahh hoseok is one of the least popular members BUT THIS IS LITERALLY A CONTRIBUTING FACTOR.

everyone """headcanons""" hoseok to be a top so they will make him a MEAN HYPERMASCULINE person. everyone """headcanons""" yoongi as a bottom so they will make him a SOFT UWU HYPERFEMININE person. shippers are literally pigeonholing the two of them into fujoshi-esque roles for jack-off material.

anyways this all boils down to: gay fetishists will do anything, ANYTHING, to twist characters or real life fucking people to fit their heteronormative view of top and bottom. top=mean and masculine, bottom=soft and feminine. hoseok is a real life human being. yoongi is a real life human being. they both have real life human personalities, and yet shippers twist their personalities into the opposite to fit their narrative, to the point where nonshippers will genuinely view the two of them as something theyre not.

you have tons of armys that theorize that hoseok's happiness is just a mask he puts on to hide a cruel nature. on twitter. on youtube. in fanart and fanfiction. you have tons of armys that truly believe that, despite literally all the evidence, believe he hates being cute, he hates being happy, he hates the members, and hes secretly a dom daddy fuckboy who wants to bend yoongi over a table. hes a real life human being and fetishists doing their fetish thing has real life consequences.

the same is true for bottom!hoseok stans: they overexaggerate his more cutesy personality traits and he does have a 'feminine' figure i.e. he has a rly small waist but they will overexaggerate that as well and give him huge hips and its disgusting but dom!hoseok is far more frequent with far more devastating consequences so i used that as an example but they’re both bad.

people who """"headcanon"""" [like actually headcanon/firmly believe and not just joking or lighthearted] that members are gay will force these types of roles onto the members. if someone genuinely believes that like, yoongi is gay/bi/whatever, and then try to force this subby soft uwu persona onto him, they have no respect for gay people. they dont. gay people are simply objects for their fantasies. their view of gay people is so one-dimensional and so driven by fetishists’ ideas that its actually disheartening.

and god bitches will deadass be homophobic yet still ship real ass human idols. not just for bts specifically but all boygroup fandoms. sometimes when you search up an idol's name, [idol] gay will be trending--whether it be because of people saying "im gay for him" or whatever, and a LOT of cishet people will try 'clearing' the searches because being gay is bad or something. people normally ‘clear’ the searches if something like [idol fat] or [idol ugly] are trending, which im telling you so you know the context that people only clear the searches when bad things are happening.

[never forget that time 'jungkook gay' was trending and bitches were like "lets clear the searches!" but their pinned tweet said some shit like "sub jungkook x dom jimin coffee shop smut au thread 🌈". bitches also be like i cant be homophobic i ship taekook]

and hoseok and yoongi arent the only ones affected ! we could get into why namjoon and jin (another popular ship) are often assigned 'dad' and 'mom' respectively, or the fact that gay fetishists not only twist members' personalities to fit their ship narrative, but will also force tropes onto them i.e. taehyung/jungkook shippers who will literally demonize jimin and call him a slut or say that he's trying to 'get in the way of' of taekook or 'steal' taehyung/jungkook but thats a whole DIFFERENT rant baby! racism/asian fetishism is also definitely a present factor in all of this but this focus was primarily on gay fetishism and heteronormativity.

oh my god i could also get into the severe transphobia/trans fetishism in this fandom too but this post is already long enough as it is

tl dr: gay fetishists will fetishize real life people and it has actual real life effects and we should ban straight women from shipping mlm

[rqs902]

.

a lin ran feature :’) i respect hes self-aware about his need to be more than cute to succeed. lin ran has always given me a vibe that hes very serious and tough on himself. he looks soft but has high demands and seems very determined to get what he wants.

im not worried about li hao bc hes surrounded by a bunch of kids who can teach him how to dance LOL not just lin ran but like jin fan and tianci too

what is this pole and could they not move it LOL

lol so jin fan and tianci did a flippy trick and we just gonna pretend like it didnt happen lol okay 

ugh so jin fan kinda got to do more dancing than other stages but i was still hoping itd be more!!! but man lin ran is really killing with his stage presence here

leave it to ycw to speak loudly and vocally about his friends being injured so people recognize their suffering

LOL lin ran’s sassy “im not stupid!!” but yea the third stage was really rough for him, so im glad he was able to recover 

LOL lin ran again casually threatening the production team to be like “please edit this stage well” “please don’t cut our segment short” LOL 

lol yea im not surprised at this point that li hao won even tho it shouldve been lin ran. youku is def making these rankings up. lol gjm did you even look at lin ran’s facial expressions???? lol making up excuses for youku wat

lin mo praising lin ran and giving him encouragement like a true bro bc he knows how hard lin ran worked for this stage. i wonder if he designed the stage rigging

AY I RESPECT OSCAR. hes a good kid and someone whos willing to speak his mind to address problems, thats awesome. they need someone to do that. he’s direct with the problems but also directly follows by complimenting them and saying how great they could be if they pulled through LOL hes still a kid so hes trying not to offend them but i respect his courage, warmth and dependability. 

LOL XUE EN DESTROYED FRANKLIN HAHAHAHAHAHHA and he goes all cutesy after like he has no idea the power he holds LOL but im glad they showed some footage of xue en also teaching the other kids dance. cto skills whooo 

ycw still bringing up shiwei? hes either very caught up in his feelings still (which is probably not a good thing at this point) or hes just a really dedicated friend... or youku is just purposefully using shiwei’s elimination for dramatic effect. 

im surprised they didnt highlight cxh more bc youku seems to like him, and conversely they gave xzx a ton of time for his stage and let xzx win. 

XUE EN IS SO HANDSOME 

okay i just needed to get that out of my system

but also im kinda glad syh is in this group bc hes the only one who i will not laugh at when singing this song. ycw and oscar talking about drinks and whiskey??? yall are babies?? also this song does NOT match this dance well at all. i see why they didnt like it when they previewed it LOL also i see now why i saw an edit on twitter of this dance over “retreat” from qcyn bc that song actually FIT the tie pulling move.. versus this im just like ??? seems so out of place?? 

also their voices all sound weird :\ maybe its just too high of a register for ycw and cxh? or maybe theyre just not very good at singing....? lol 

giving xue en the only multi colored tie? THEY KNEW. 

im just happy that the party group was able to make their stage so well that other kids were regretting not choosing them bc ycw was really struggling to get people to join him...

LOL CSP BEING SILLY TO ZHAN YU THIS IS THE FRIENDSHIP I NEED

LOL XZX AND LIN MO are adorable together 

im glad that they spent time to say zhaohao has improved, i feel like hes gotten zero recognition so far. i feel like ycw winning is the only win i am willing to believe so far. (couldve been xue en too tho) 

A FEATURE ON XIKAN’S FRIENDSHIP WITH LUO ZHENG omggggggggggggggg luo zheng the sweetest ge, leaving all the good things for xikan whatt ugh but luo zheng is like literally going actor route so sad that he still wants to be on stage but has no opportunities. im grateful theyre still so close that xikan starts crying just thinking about him 

xikan being involved in the stage design and costuming and all makes me think of lin ran but also makes me think of cai xukun. cxk always gets so involved in every little detail to seek perfection

interesting that they focused it all on zry and lxk........ but at least highlighted xikan’s fun side

lol they purposefully cut in fan yu screaming zry’s name and ycw yelling cyc.... 

but also tbh xikan’s voice was not very strong during his high note and i know hes giving 110% into his dancing so im guessing he doesnt have much air left at that point but i was kinda disappointed it couldve been better. BUT he still did a good job. i thought the part where they ripped off his jacket couldve been more impactful? but it felt like it was just randomly in the middle of the rap break and he doesnt sing again until much later so it was like why did you change clothes there? 

tbh this song isnt that exciting? so im surprised that they wanted it that badly? 

i saw spoilers that fan yu was gonna be there and its adorable and i love their friendship but lol zuo ye being like i shouldve asked all my gege’s to come.... lol aka they know its kinda unfair for fan yu to be winning votes for zry

im grateful all the trainees are supportive of xikan and they purposefully showed a bunch of popular kids cheering for xikan

gosh that injury on his nose, you know hes put too much energy and is too invested into his dance part when he rips his own face like that :\ 

i saw spoilers that renyu would win and someone did the math that it makes zero sense for their group’s score to be that low, but i didnt expect their score to be THAT low.... goodness wtf thats definitely rigged, i see why people were mad. 

renyu winning is either entirely rigged bc youku wants him to debut or people are really just voting for him bc fan yu was there and that’s not fair either. i love renyu (and his friendship with fan yu) but there’s no way renyu actually won that many votes on a stage where he didnt really show his vocals that much and he messed up his dancing and he was surrounded by kids who danced much better and wouldve made him look not great. this makes zero sense. and the fact that ycw is the only winner that made sense is probably bc youku was like well we cant make it too obvious that its all a joke. but really, its all a joke. 

yes i love that renyu worked hard and stayed up all night but can we talk about how xikan does that for every stage? and renyu’s just now started to do so. renyu just came into this competition less prepared, so his improvement is easier to see. 

i still think if youku wants to debut renyu, theyll kick out lin ran from top 7, but can we talk about how lin ran put in all the effort to design and perfect his stage? how he teaches others to dance and pushes his group mates to shine as a leader and how he has truly one of the most memorable and formidable stage presences on this whole show? people say the debuting group will need renyu’s voice but how can you really say that renyu fits and is prepared and deserves to debut more than lin ran? 

renyu is adorable and talented but let’s be real, as a vocalist, hes not like you zhangjing, hes not like zhao lei, hes not like zhao pinlin, hes not proven that he really fits to be a main vocal in a boy band. youku cannot force us into believing that he can fit that role without any evidence to prove his worth. its like theyre trying to jam someone into that role and its like renyu’s their closest bet, but even tho he still doesnt quite fit, theyre just gonna shove him in anyway. this is what happens when you only give attention to people who are dancers and dont give actual attention to people who are actually boy band main vocal material.... /COUGH ZHAN YU or even cui shaopeng?? 

how can you possibly believe that renyu got 173 but their average was 134? none of xikan’s groups numbers make sense: 

how did shengen suddenly drop so much? youku has been touting him this whole time into the top 10. shouldnt more of xikan’s fans voted for xuyu? bc he literally begged during the last elim for xuyu to make it this far. xuyu wasnt even dead last in the elim ranking but here he gets last place by like 15 votes??? when everyone else’s vote difference is like half of that at max? 

you expect me to believe lin ran only got 127 after he literally descended from the ceiling as an angel? that doesnt attract attention? how are both zuo ye and hu wenxuan so low? wenxuan was literally center and had bright pink hair, and in a song style that suited him, you cant tell me he didnt shine on this stage. xikan tied with xzx???? beneath a kou cong and su xunlun tie??? no way 

theres one week left and youku’s getting desperate to make it look like whatever they’re going to make happen will be a natural result, that this competition is up in the air and no one is safe, but it just seems very questionable to me. 

sooo does this mean there arent gonna be elims before the finals or what, we just dont see them announce who gets to perform? im assuming not all 32 kids will take part? and theres not gonna be a mentor collab stage? it wouldve been cool to see han yu and cheng xiao with the kids. there were 3 stages between the first and second elimination but no third elim and no mentor stage? its a mad rush to the end, honestly. 

oh well, we still love these CHILDREN 

ps: if youve been following my rants, i honestly feel like i have had a really positive impression of zheng renyu from the start and i really do like him. he makes really good songs and his voice is very nice and his friendships are pure and his attitude is commendable. 凄美地 and 當帷幕落下 and 後來的我們 are some of my favorite favorite songs to listen to from this entire show, like probably 3 of my top 5, and a good deal of that is because of renyu and his voice. but im just trying to be realistic and renyu is not in my ideal debuting boy band. 

[rocknrollpourlavie]

Ill be 28 in a month. 28 is such a random age, like your not too old but not too young. You've been through alot possibly but youre still young enough to really really remember being a teenager which for me royally sucked and youre still young enough to be hopeful about how your life will really turn out because your life doesnt really start till your 30 flirty and thriving right? Thats what you'll believe if watch to many tv shows and movies. I cannot believe its been 10 years since I graduated high school, I mean that means absolutely nothing to me and shouldnt to you either, its literally just 10 years since youve been told you have to have a pass to roam the hallways. Ive thought alot about whether I would even attend my high school reunion, but now with the way everything is I dont imagine they'll even have one this year, maybe they'll send us all a postcard with a zoom link and we can see our old classmates with their husbands and babies in their houses, but I imagine many of them are like me, no husband, no boyfriend, no official house in my name, no baby, no wrinkles maybe my eyes look more tired than they did 10 years ago due to all the "living" ive done, y'know, the late nights/early mornings, the sleeping in till 1pm for 2 years straight, the staying out till 3 am dead sober but high on life, just taking midnight strolls in Paris and back to a balcony view of the eiffel tower and the tearing up of the sidewalks on the lower east side, and my poor camera shutters have done so much work they must be exhausted and the running up the steps to the Plaza at 2 am after drinks at bemmelmans bar and the leisurely 2 am jaunts from 919 1st ave N to the feeling of the breeze on beach drive near the harbor, after a few hours of laughs and hugs with random strangers and close aquaintances. Its starting to show on my face like a badge of honor. I feel honored, to have accomplished so much and absolutely nothing at all. I was pretty popular in high school. I sat in the back of the class with the popular kids and still said hello to the scene kids in the hallways. I didnt really start going to shows till I was 16, but with my belief system that I've been holding tight to since I was 13 maybe before then too, it was a difficult balance of having lots of Aquaintances and lots of crushes and saying hi and being said hi to by to 10-12 different people on the way to class every morning but at the same time having to distance myself from others socially. Punks arent such a bad influence when they're contained in a theater where the bouncers will kick you out for smoking and moshing to violently and throwing beer bottles at the band but then I went to real warehouse shows, noise shows, punk bands, one man shows, cute guysin bands are like finding a needle in a haystack here, and yeah those shows were always good vibes, nothing evil ever happened, I think the heat in florida keeps people too calm and warm inside and out, to do those things. But then again there are florida men and women out there. Too anyone who actually read this I love you and I cant write anymore cause Im exhausted good kgnt

[artificialqueens]

Our Very Own Love Story, Ch 2 (Branjie) - Rewritethoughts

hi guys<3! I hope you like the second chapter, feel free to tell me what you think about it in the comments <3

you can check more of my work on AO3!

Vanessa is one of the people who still believe in fairytales and happy endings, yes, she got heartbroken few times but at the end of the day she knew she was going to find her soulmate one way or another and she is a Libra after all, so stubborn and they never give up.

So in the morning when her friend Monet came to her studio while she was working on a new design for one of the most popular entertainers on Hollywood these days where they have been working together for months now, at first she wanted to kick her out for distracting her but then Monet got to her point

“Vanjie, you know my new girlfriend Nina right?” she asked as if Monet doesn’t mention her name every two seconds.

“Yeah bitch you mention her even on your sleep” I told her placing a pin on the mannequin “First thing, fuck you, second thing I met her best friend Brooke Lynn a couple of weeks ago and I have been seeing her a lot, I told Nina that she is hundred percent your style and then we got an idea of a blind date, so what do you think about going out tonight cause I already said yes.”

“I don’t know Monet, last time I promised myself I would be more careful in relationships and I just started doing designs and shit for celebrities now, I don’t want to risk breaking my heart for no bitch.” Vanessa’s last relationship ended with her girlfriend cheating on her after she moved to Los Angeles where her ex-girlfriend used to live and three months after she packed her things and moved back with her mother. Vanessa promised herself to be more careful and not fall in love with the first woman who shows her affection.

“ I swear bitch Brooke Lynn is not like all the other hoes you used to date, she is your type and I wouldn’t even mention her if I wasn’t sure you would like her.”

“You don’t even know my type hoe.” Vanessa said still working on her garment as she speaks as Monet laughed at her “Well she is white, blonde, cold and powerful as fuck that when she walks to the room everyone stays quiet and I know how much you like powerful bitches-” Monet stopped for a minute then she looked at Vanessa’s eyes and she said “And I’m pretty sure she will let you call her mommy too, you know ”

Vanessa’s face flushed as she turned bright red thanking god that her employees arent around “I don’t know what you mean.” she said looking anywhere but her friend’s eye.

“We used to live together and the apartment had thin walls, had to listen to you screaming mommy that I started calling my mother by her first name” she said laughing “Just go out tonight have fun and if you don’t like her so be it she won’t have an amazing sexy designer with a stupid pussycat tattoo all over her tits ”

“Hey! I love that tattoo for your information” Vanessa said acting as she was offended but they both know that Vanessa actually hates her tattoo.

“Miss Mateo your client is here ” yvie, her assistant told her “Ew, saying miss Mateo sounds wrong, whatever hoe the Hollywood sexy star is waiting outside.” Vanessa laughed telling her to let her in laughing at her childhood friend who became her biggest supporter during her start and that’s why Vanessa wanted to start a clothing line the first one she asked to help was her knowing she won’t give two shits on telling her the truth about her designs, even if she thought they were ugly.

Later that night she made her way to her apartment getting dressed in her favorite color, Red. As a good luck charm, even though she always promised herself not to get her hopes up but Vanessa loved being in a relationship where she knows there is someone waiting for her to call, cuddle and be herself with.

The moment she saw Brooke Lynn’s face she felt like she looked familiar. But she couldn’t hide the fact that Brooke Lynn was the prettiest thing she ever saw. She was tall very tall and dressed in a sexy high waisted white pantsuit that looked like it was from Gucci’s last collection and a baby blue top that showed all her back. Telling from her looks Vanessa could figure out that Brooke is extremely confident and that she looked like a million bucks.

“So Brooke Lynn tell me about yourself,” she asked her not just to keep the conversation going but she was really interested in the blonde woman.

“What do you want to know?” Vanessa noticed that whenever Brooke was nervous she would hold the golden necklace and then she noticed the letter ‘K’ and she cants help herself but wonder who is k, is she an ex? Or a current girlfriend, Vanessa couldn’t stop herself from as she asked Brooke

“What does K stand for?” she noticed Brooke looking confused as she tried to explain herself without sounding like a freak “Your necklace I mean I noticed a ‘’K’ letter on that pretty neck of yours ” Brooke held her necklace again as Vanessa swore she saw her eyes shining for a moment, at this moment she was thinking of ways to kill Monet for setting her up with someone who is in a relationship, but Vanessa was shocked to hear what came out of the blondie’s mouth.

“Oh that. It stands for Kimberly my daughter’s name” Brooke explained to her touching the necklace on her neck

Vanessa didn’t know why she was so happy to hear that “Oh, I have a son too! His name is Riley and he is the cutest dog ever-” Brooke couldn’t help but laugh “Vanessa, Kim is a real human ” She started to wonder if Brooke was married before or she used to be straight and the one thing that she knew for sure is that she was interested in Brooke more than she was ever interested in a first date.

She started to think about a baby girl that looked like Brooke Lynn walking around with blonde hair and cute chubby cheeks as she asked “how old is she? She must be real cute like her mommy”

“I adopted her at age 14 she is 20 now and I wish we look like each other but she doesn’t look anything like me ” at this moment Vanessa knew for sure that she was head over heels crushing on her, when Monet was telling her about Brooke she thought she was a cold-hearted human and now Her whole point of view changed

——

Later on that night they were at Vanessa’s doorsteps when Brooke asked Vanessa if she could kiss her, and Vanessa like her heart would stop from how excited she was to feel Brooke soft lips on top of hers.

Their kiss was perfect that if they were in a movie that would be winning best on-screen kiss, she felt firework all over her body as she grabbed Brooke neck to pull her closer while Brooke grabbed her hips pinning her to the wall as she couldn’t help but whimper as her back hit the wall.

While they were heavily making out Brookes phone started ringing and they broke the kiss for a moment Brooke putting it on silence as they were about to start making out again, a man was opening the door to get inside the apartment building “Vanjie do you want me to keep the door open ?” the man asked

“Yes, thank you brain ” he smiled to her as he left the door half-open while he left them alone

“Why did he call you Vanjie?”

“Everyone calls me Vanjie,” Vanessa said as she interviewed her hands with Brooke “That was an amazing night Brooke.”

“ I think I want to see you again Vanessa Mateo,” Brooke said as she looked deep into her eyes where she swore her heart stopped for a second.

“ I think I’d like that miss Brooke Lynn I don’t know your last name yet” Brooke chuckled as she said

“Hytes”

“Hmm, Brooke Lynn Hytes ” Vanessa kissing her one last time before she entered her building.

“WAIT” she heard Brooke’s voice before closing the door “ I don’t have your number,” she said handing Vanessa her phone to write it down, she wrote her number and handed the blondie her phone back

“text me soon mamí,” Vanessa said kissing her earlobe as she closed the door.

—–

When Brooke entered her the house she went straight to her daughter’s room “Hey sweetie” she bent down kissing her forehead as Kim made some space for her to set down next to her “How was your day?”

“Well I went to rehearsals with plastique to get ready for the show then I went to a dress fitting for the outfit you choose for me and then I and Nina went shopping, what about you I thought you were gonna be there ”

“ I had a date,” Brooke told her while blushing yet she thanked God that she had a lot of makeup on her face that it didn’t show her red cheeks

“You mean you had sex with a girl you will never call back”

“We didn’t have sex and I will see her again soon” Kim stopped watching whatever show she had on Netflix and turned to look at her

“Wait, Brooke are you serious? Like you want to go on a second date with her?”

“Yes sweetie I really think I like her,” she said looking at her daughter who jumped to hug her.

“ I’m so fucking happy for you to Brooke I could cry right now ”

“Oh bitch don’t you dare cry on me I swear to god even if you are 20 I’ll kick your ass ” she kissed her daughter a goodnight kiss as she left too her room clicked on Vanessa’s number as she texted her

Brooke: Monday night? After work, I can pick you up from work if you want.

Vanessa: Sounds great mamí

[backtobasicbellas]

If you’re accepting, an AU of Zadison I would love to see: zadison in harry potter, where madison’s a slytherin and zoe’s the hufflepuff or gryffindor she knows she shouldn’t hit on out of rivalry but divination says they’re meant to be :D Your fics on AO3 about them were FANTASTIC, by the way! Thank you for those.

who’s to fight it? (it’s your future)

words: 3,017

(this truly got longer than i expected but…here it is! also check out madison and zoe’s hogwarts moodboards i made)

When Professor Day pairs her students up for her activity of the day, Madison is pleasantly surprised when she finds herself working with Gryffindor Zoe Benson.

Madison wasn’t really listening to any of Professor Day’s lecture, but she’s pretty sure it has something to do with killing a plant and then reviving it or something dumb like that. Either way, Zoe’s smart and was probably hanging onto their professor’s every instruction.

She adjusts her silver and green tie as Zoe approaches.

“Were you even listening at all?” Zoe lightly teases.

Madison rolls her eyes. “We’ll be fine.”

She and Zoe aren’t friends - Madison would really rather not call a Gryffindor a friend - but they’re friendly enough towards each other. Madison has a reputation of being a bitch, which she proudly encourages and lives up to, but Zoe has never once seemed afraid of her or judgemental of her.

Of course, Zoe isn’t excused from Madison’s jabs, but she always takes them in stride, either rolling her eyes or shrugging it off. Madison kind of admires that, really.

Actually, Madison’s always thought Zoe’s cute. She’s kind of hot too, like when she’s kind of pissed or when she wears that proud smirk when someone tries to correct her in class only for them to be incorrect and Zoe to be completely right and follow through with an execution of whatever spell they’re learning.

However, Madison would be caught dead before she ever hit on a Gryffindor. She’s a Slytherin for crying out loud; she can’t go around fraternizing with the likes of Zoe just because she’s cute and Madison’s bored.

(And yes, it might be because Madison is a little competitive and their two houses have a rivalry that runs deep.

So what?)

“Are you going to get us started or should I just do it all myself?”

Madison quirks an eyebrow at Zoe’s slight hint of sass, clearly impressed. Zoe only looks at her expectantly, so after a moment Madison lets out a scoff.

“Fine,” she says before she’s waving her hand over the plant and murmuring a few words in latin.

The plant wilts on command, looking very much dead, and Madison turns to Zoe with a smirk.

“See? Easy.”

Zoe simply rolls her eyes at Madison, now placing her hand over the plant and reciting a few different words in latin.

Madison can’t help but be slightly entranced; Zoe recites spells with such conviction and focus. She turns her head when Zoe finishes, watching as the plant comes back to life effortlessly, like it’s been meant to do that all along.

“Miss Montgomery, Miss Benson,” Professor Day says with a smile. “Excellent execution.”

Zoe beams. “Thank you, Professor.”

Madison snorts when Professor Day passes. “See? I told you.”

Zoe rolls her eyes and laughs, and Madison tries not to be so affected by the pure sound.

And Madison wants to add something else, something that she knows can get Zoe’s cheeks to match the red on her own tie, but she stops herself.

She can’t do that, not with Zoe.

//

Madison knows she’s a powerful witch.

She’s known it for as long as she can remember, both of her parents coming from a magical line of wizards and witches tracing all the way back as far as Madison’s concerned.

However, the one thing she doesn’t seem to be mastering any time soon is divination. She just kind of thinks it’s ridiculous, who even needs divination  that seriously anyway? Madison’s a firm believer of creating your own future - or whatever bullshit people spew out these days.

This particular frustration, however, comes to her in divination class because Madison sucks at every kind of divination. What’s even more annoying though is she sits next to Nan, a Ravenclaw who somehow knows things most people don’t, and she’s really fucking good at this.

“It’s not hard,” Nan shrugs when they study Tessomancy.

Madison’s gaze snaps up from her stupid tea leaves to glare at her classmate.

“We get it bitch, you’re some prophet or some shit,” she sneers.

Nan is unbothered by her jab though, and goes back to her tea leaves. Madison peers at her own just to see nothing more than soggy tea leaves that should probably be thrown out.

Madison is honestly ready to give up on the class - who cares if Professor Goode borderline fails her, really it’s just stupid divination - when they get around to crystal gazing.

“You want me to look at this dumb crystal ball and see my future?” Madison scoffs. “This class is so dumb.”

Professor Goode gives Madison a look. “Will you just try it, Madison? Nan will help you.”

Nan smiles at her, but Madison only rolls her eyes and lets out another scoff. Professor Goode sighs and moves on to another set of students, clearly just as exasperated with Madison as the girl is with her class.

And it takes some push and pull from both of them, but Madison finally gives in, relaxing completely and the fog finally decides to change.

What she sees confuses her and intrigues her all at the same time, and when Nan asks what she sees, she’s back to her normal self.

“None of your goddamn business.”

(She thinks about it the rest of the day, the rest of the week.)

//

Madison refuses to talk to anyone - especially Nan, who somehow looks like she knows exactly what Madison saw - about what she saw in that stupid crystal ball.

She doesn’t tell anyone because it’s stupid and dumb, and how accurate is this shit anyway?

Yet it feels like she can’t escape it, no matter how hard she tries because she’s in the library - thank you Professor Goode for being an ultimate pain in the ass - when she sees none other than Gryffindor Zoe Benson.

It wouldn’t be such a problem seeing Zoe - besides the fact, you know, most Gryffindors are the biggest pain her ass - but when she sees the brunette she’s immediately brought back to divination and what she saw and really, she’s still trying to wrap her mind around it.

That stupid crystal ball made one thing very clear: she and Zoe are supposed to end up together.

Madison almost scoffs out loud in the library when the thought appears in her mind again because just look at Zoe. She’s got her nose buried in a book and looks actually pleased to be spending an afternoon in the library of all places reading a book. Her eyes are lit up with wonder and she’s so lost in her reading and - okay, she actually looks kind of cute like this.

But the point is, how the fuck is Madison even supposed to end up with someone like Zoe Benson?

Zoe’s, like, a complete nerd even if she is friends with Mallory, who’s one of those popular Quidditch players. And more importantly Zoe’s a Gryffindor. Madison knows better than to date someone like that; she’s a goddamn Slytherin for crying out loud.

//

Zoe Benson is starting to pop up everywhere.

They’re in the same year so seeing each other around isn’t much of a surprise, but Madison swears the universe is out to get her.

She feels like everywhere she turns, Zoe is somehow also in the same place at the same time. Madison’s passed her in the hallways between classes and to and from meals more times than she can count. When she has to go to the library, Zoe is in there either by herself or with a friend or two studying or reading.

(Which, Madison will admit sometimes she plans her trips because she knows a certain Gryffindor will be in there.

Sue her.)

It’s getting ridiculous actually, how all she can think about is Zoe and her dumb smile and how smart she is and how she doesn’t take anyone’s shit and -

God dammit, Madison. Get a grip.

“You’re thinking too loud.”

Madison whips her head to look at Nan. The girl is writing her notes in her notebook, not even bothering to meet Madison’s gaze.

“What are you talking about?”

“If this is about whatever you saw when were crystal-gazing, it’s obviously going to happen,” Nan states in a matter-of-fact tone as she finishes writing the last of her sentence before dipping her quill into the ink while Madison gapes at her. “So you might as well stop fighting it.”

It’s now that Madison wonders if it’s even possible for the likes of wizards and witches to be clairvoyant because she’s pretty sure Nan is. It’s like she’s in Madison’s head.

“I didn’t see anything,” she snaps, trying to brush off the conversation as she turns her attention back to her half-written notes. “And even if I did, I wouldn’t care. This shit is stupid.”

Nan simply says, “I think we both know I’m right.”

A scoff drops from Madison’s lips as she turns and looks at Nan again, expecting the smaller girl to at least elaborate. When Nan doesn’t, Madison rolls her eyes and grabs her quill pen from the ink bottle, trying to block out all and any thoughts of the crystal ball and Zoe Benson.

//

When Madison walks into Professor Goode’s classroom well after classes have finished, she’s greeted by a slightly confused look.

“Miss Montgomery,” she greets with slight confusion, but a smile nonetheless. “What can I do for you?”

“I was wondering if I could practice my crystal-gazing,” Madison tells her a little too simply. “Nan has been trying to work with me outside of class, but, you know, kind of hard to actually practice without a crystal ball.”

Professor Goode is surprised by her answer, but she lights up at the prospect of Madison actually putting in effort to succeed in her class. The Slytherin resists the urge to roll her eyes at the expression.

“Of course,” Professor Goode nods, standing from her chair and making her way to the back of the classroom.

Madison follows her slowly, arms crossed and fingers tapping against her robe.

Professor Goode retrieves one of her crystal balls and hands it over to Madison.

“You can use it in here,” she informs the young witch. “Just make sure you put it back after.”

Madison offers the tiniest of smiles. “Thank you, Professor.”

Professor Goode gives her one last nod before she returns to her desk in the front of the classroom.

Madison slips into the first row of desks she sees and places the crystal ball in front of her. She exhales slowly, letting herself relax before she focuses her attention on the crystal ball before her. It takes a few moments, but the fog is beginning to clear.

The first scene she sees is herself and Zoe in an empty corridor, this Madison pulling Zoe by her collar and kissing her senseless. She watches as Zoe giggles against Madison’s lips and Madison smiles against her lips.

The next scene must be a few years later, Madison guesses they might even be graduated from Hogwarts by then, but they walk down a street, holding hands. This Madison looks happy and her eyes shine when they look at this older Zoe, who is pulling her along and into a bookstore.

The following scene brings Madison to what looks like a flat. She recognizes herself and Zoe, a few years older than they were in the last scene. Zoe is curled up on the couch reading a book. Older Madison enters the scene, wearing an oversized sweater and probably not much else, and she walks behind the couch before she’s leaning over to wrap her arms around Zoe’s shoulders from behind.

Zoe shifts back comfortably against her, and Madison lets out a content sigh before she’s leaving kisses all over Zoe until Zoe cannot focus on her book anymore. Zoe tugs Madison over the couch with a yelp from the blonde, and they’re laughing and kissing and saying “I love you.” This Madison is wearing a ring.

The final scene Madison sees is much farther in the future. She and Zoe are white-haired and old and everything Madison somewhat dreads about aging, but they are in a kitchen where Zoe cooks dinner and Madison is perched at the counter watching. Zoe lets Madison taste whatever she has cooking and Madison beams at her before Zoe is kissing her sweetly. This Madison’s eyes are full of love and appreciation and something Madison has always been longing for.

When the fog fully returns, Madison blinks a few times before pulling herself away from the crystal ball. She’s quiet after, mulling over the scenes she’s seen again and the thoughts running through her mind.

She returns the crystal ball and quietly thanks Professor Goode before walks out, trying to truly process what she’s known for weeks.

She and Zoe are meant to be.

//

It’s the weekend trip into Hogsmeade and Madison decides at the last minute to go. The weather is nice outside; it’s evident by the sheer increase of people on the train this time around and how excited they are once they arrive, practically flying out of the train as soon as the doors open.

Madison takes her time and strolls around; it reminds her often of when she was much younger and her parents would talk of taking a trip to Hogsmeade back during their days at Hogwarts, telling Madison that she’d long for her weekend trips there.

She’s passing by Honeydukes when she recognizes a certain brunette wandering the street by herself. For a moment, Madison hesitates. She chews her bottom lip, almost stopping in her tracks.

The rivalry inside of her won’t just quit it - this much she knows - but she thinks about what her future’s supposed to be like. She reminds herself how the Madison she’d seen in the crystal ball had everything that she’s felt like she’s missing and has been longing for.

She quickens her pace, falling into step with the other girl.

“What, did all your friends ditch you?”

Zoe looks at Madison and shakes her head, a smile appearing on her features. “Hello to you too, Madison.”

Madison gives her an amused look. “Let me guess, you told them you were going to Tomes and Scrolls and they  all decided they have better things to do.”

“And what’s wrong with Tomes and Scrolls?” Zoe asks, mildly offended.

“God Benson, you’re such a nerd,” Madison tells her.

“Some of us actually enjoy learning, you know.”

Madison smirks. “I know; you’re kind of hot when you’re all concentrated in the library.”

Initially, Zoe’s cheeks flush. She ducks her head, attempting to let her face hide the way she’s been affected by Madison’s words. Madison resists lighting up at the reaction.

“I…Are you spying on me in the library, Montgomery?”

Madison shrugs, tossing her hair behind her shoulder. “I know how to appreciate a view when I see one, that’s all.”

She notices how Zoe bites her lip, but not before a smile starts to spread. Her cheeks are still flushed, and she’s left somewhat stuttering because Madison is completely catching her by surprise.

Madison knows she’s got Zoe right where she wants her.

“Come on nerd,” she says suddenly, beginning to walk ahead of Zoe.

“Where are we going?”

“Did you not want to go to Tomes and Scrolls?”

Zoe frowns. “You just…”

Madison rolls her eyes, reaching out and pulling Zoe’s hand to tug her forward. “Let’s go before I change my mind.”

Zoe looks from their hands to Madison’s expectant expression. She manages a nod, letting Madison hold her hand until the blonde lets go.

And Madison may complain about books and how boring it is the whole time, but she sure has fun making Zoe blush and stutter with every other comment.

//

“Madison, I’m trying to study,” Zoe huffs. “You should be too, you know.”

“I’m tired of studying,” Madison tells her. “Can’t we like, do anything else?”

“And what would you like to do?”

Madison’s eyes light up, she smirks.

Right where she wants her, yet again.

“I could think of a few things I’d do to you.”

Zoe blushes furiously, Madison’s name coming off as a hiss on her lips before she’s turning back to her books and pointedly not looking at the blonde.

Madison grins wide, leaning back in her chair comfortably.

//

Hogsmeade becomes a regular activity for Madison and Zoe, as in going together.

This time when they go, Madison slips her hand into Zoe’s like it’s the most natural thing in the world. There’s slight surprise on Zoe’s face, but she doesn’t say a word.

Madison holds her hand for basically the whole trip, with exceptions of entering stores and eventually the pub.

Zoe doesn’t mind, she likes when Madison intertwines their fingers, how someone who outwardly seems so cold feels so warm in her grasp. She doesn’t pull away even when Madison has her flushed and stuttering, like always.

(And sure, maybe Zoe’s friends raise their eyebrows, and she owes them an explanation later.

But Madison’s threatening look is enough for them to mind their own business for now.)

//

Madison swears she’s waiting for Zoe to finally make a move.

She is, but Zoe is just so adorably cautious, so afraid for pulling the trigger and going in.

So Madison gives in.

Zoe is in the middle of explanation some spell or another to Madison when Madison tugs the front of her sweater and pulls her in. Their lips meet and it’s clear Zoe wasn’t expecting this at all, but she melts when Madison kisses her and it’s enough for Madison to know this is exactly where she needs to be.

“Oh,” Zoe says when Madison pulls away.

She looks dazed and utterly adorable and it’s hard enough for Madison not to pin her up against the wall immediately.

“What?” Madison asks playfully, an amused expression on her face. “You didn’t think I was flirting with you just for fun now, did you?”

It makes Zoe laugh before she replies, “You’re such a smart ass” and pulls Madison in for another kiss.

[the-kipsabian]

Please do this at your convenience but like. Can you put me together a playlist of what you consider to be Danny's best vocals? Or his best work in general? Nsp, starbomb, skyhill? I just want a good starting place

dude, honestly tho? i would be absolutely honored to do this

k so aaaAAAA lets start with. skyhill i guess since thats the first one on the line? (technically i think northern hues is the first band he was in that published stuff but i havent listened to it myself so i dont knoooow anything about it other than what i just read from a comment on a youtube video and that is that it definitely sounds like the kind of music dan would have made in his stoner days which probably was true lol)

skyhill has a lot of really good chill songs tho? i personally really love ‘the city as you walk’ and ‘black & white’ the most i think - both are like lyrically really nice to listen to and the chorus especially in black & white is just hnggg. its so good tbh. but really any skyhill songs are good! they arents. as advanced vocally as his later stuff obviously, since this band is like. 12 years old at this point at least but its nice chill stuff with honestly really nice but simple lyrics if you want some good stuff to listen to as a break from all the dick jokes and whatnots that nsp and starbomb have to offer tho!

starbomb is honestly a bit more difficult tho cause its like. much more arin-heavy with the raps and such? but! lets not have that fool us cause there are still plenty of quality songs with pretty vocals by dan tho! ..also hahaa i think its needless to say but hey heres a heavy nsfw warning for these songs

‘mega marital problems’ is a personal favorite, mostly cause dan does like. three different voices in this one? and its hilarious. also if you listen in the chorus parts, you can hear the layered singing he does and its honestly just so good mmmm

‘crasher-vania’ i feel like im gonna betray myself if i dont put this on the list for multiple reasons. 1. its EASILY the most popular song on the album. 2. its freaking fantastic, with the story and the lyrics. 3. the chorus, again? (as dan most often did the chorus work on the first album!) it sounds beautiful and especially in the second chorus, you can hear him emoting it out with the lyrics. 4. the background music. if you stop to listen to it, its honestly so good? like, its very simple, yes, but it works and it just sounds awesome. always brings a smile on my face to listen to those tasty keyboard jams ~

im gonna add ‘regretroid’ here too, as its a personal favorite too. but also his voice. goes so high? and it sounds nice?? also this song is just banging with a female feature vocalist! which is real nice!!

as for the second starbomb album! im separating it a little cause woo the boys honestly improve a lot between the albums (which is crazy cause theres only like. a year? year and a half at max? between these two albums so i cant even think how good the third one is gonna sound with five years between albums and how good current nsp sounds lol)

‘smash!’ i gotta mention cause its like. the single song from the album i feel like? also cause mark is in it! and they all sound rad and yeah it doesnt have exactly too much singing but what it has sounds. so freaking good tho mmmmm i lov

‘glass joe’s title fight’ is a must on this tho cause like. this is the one starbomb song thats so much more sing than rap heavy and hngggg its so good

‘god of no more’ okay but. dans vocals in this are gorgeous. and its a super fun song too. so its a win-win

and as a personal favorite, im just gonna throw ‘robots in need of disguise’ here cause i love this song. no other reason really lol

and thennnnn we arrive to the glory that is ninja sex party! i could be a little shit and just say to listen to all lol, but im gonna try to pick things here and there among my favorites! trying to also go by album order with these ~ also nsfw warning for this but idk what you expect with a band called ninja sex party tho

‘nsp theme song’ i mean. come on. you gotta start somewhere so lets go with this lol. and its hilarious (and kinda cute but maybe thats just me lol) and the lyrics are just. well what you’d expect with the name of the song. its very simple vocal-wise, but other than that, grade a stuff tho

‘dinosaur laser fight’ is just a classic, so here you go. its wonderful and weird and animated by arin so aaaaaa!

..also i wanna add ‘objects of desire’ here cause this song is like. lyrical genius tbh. its fucking weird but its also like a ballad so theres some nice vocal stuff here too so yay. thingssssss

‘unicorn wizard’ i honestly wouldnt be true to myself if i didnt add my FIRST nsp song to this list, the one that got me listening to these fools cause mmm. this song is ridiculous and but also lyrics? are so good?? idk how that combo works out but it does and its beautiful. also dannys vocals in the chorus are mmmmm. so solid

‘fyi i wanna f your a’ im not even ashamed to say this is one of my faves tbh. its just. the glorious kind of weird and this is like one of my favorite examples of how well these nerds write lyrics tho? also such a hard song to learn the lyrics tho, but its so worth it, trust me lol. aLSO DAN HARMONIES IN THE SECOND PART GIVE ME SO MUCH LIFE HOLY SHIT

‘let’s get this terrible party started’ gets a special mention cause of the badass jams tbh. also the lyric ‘its a ninja sex party party’ gets me every fucking time. even after five years of listening to this song lol

oooof attitude city is so hard to pick just few songs from tho aaaa. but, as ive done about three from every album so far, lets try that with this one too. tho honestly just. listen to the entirety of attitude city its so good mmm. but. lets start with what i personally feel is the most underrated song on the album, ‘peppermint creams’. i dont think i need to say more than holy shit the emotions tho? especially in the chorus cause mmm. my heart

‘attitude city’ gets here too tho cause like. im personally very nostalgic for this song as it was the first real hype i had for the album so yeah. also its honestly just a really good song. also the video. includes dancing. and we all should know how i feel about dan dancing so mmmMMM im biased as shit i admit it

‘cookies!’ i wanna put this here cause it shows the how stupidly versatile these nerds are with their songs, cause this is badass and silly cute at the same time and hngg. also visually? demon!dan is way too much of a guilty pleasure. judge me all you want i donT CARE

..also i just gotta mention ‘samurai abstinence patrol’ cause of the vocal work. and just cause this song was in progress for four years before this final form and its beautiful honestly. also ‘danny french kissed a girl like he was the king of versailles’ will never get old to me gosh

I SWEAR IM DONE WITH ATTITUDE CITY AFTER THIS but also ‘6969′ is a must to mention. its an eight and half minute song but its just. amazing at everything. beautiful jams and awesome vocals. its gorgeous tbh, a masterpiece

‘cool patrol’. first of all cause apparently i “traumatized” one of my friends by making him watch the video to this and yeah. this is vocally one of my absolute favorites from them tho, dan sounds amazing in both styles, and its just. so positive and cute and aaaaa. its just such an uplifting song i love it

‘danny don’t you know’ cause this one made my cry the first few times i listened to it and its just. so relatable. also fucking beautiful vocals tho and yes the lyrics are personal which makes it even more emotional song. hnggg i love this so much tho cause it just. goes from kind of a ballad to a more of a rock song and its amazing. development similar to the story its telling

‘first date’ i mean. i gotta put my current fave song of theirs here, right? RIGHT? personally i love this cause its just a positive song, in a way i guess, but it stays true to the original nsp style and the lyrics are just perfect for their song about dating tbh. especially with how it just keeps getting gradually weirder and weirder. its just perfection hnggg i love this song. so much. god its so good (honestly tho if you give me a lyric like ‘i’ll take you back to your place and we’ll craft the perfect alibi’ idk how you expect me, a thriller writer, not to absolutely love this song to hell and back)

‘courtship of the mermaid’ idk how you expect me to make a list without this. the emotions in the vocals of this song are beautiful and its, again, hilariously absurd. as a mermaid princess i highly approve of this song

‘mansion party’ its so sad there will probably never be a video of this song cause they want to film it in an actual mansion and so far they havent mentioned that they got a chance to do that so mmmm. cause this song is so fucking banging it deserves a video honestly. the chorus is like. one of the few things in this world that makes me wanna dance. and also theres so many genius lyrics in this that its just pure gold all the way through tbh (also how do you smoke champagne? asking for a friend)

one more i swear, but the whole cool patrol album is so good hngg. but! ‘smooth talkin’’! in all of its absurdity is a must to listen to. its just what the title says, about how smooth danny is with talking to ladies. im not gonna explain more just. it goes as well as you’d expect at this point

..this is already super long but hey did you know we are still missing the two cover albums tho??

‘everybody wants to rule the world’ this one makes me wanna cry every single time. its so nice and emotional and just. a+ vocals. its just beautiful

‘subdivisions’ idk what it is really with this song but these lyrics just fit together with dan’s voice so well its just. hnggg so gorgeous? i mean it might be cause its a rush song but also yeah. its so good

‘africa’ i mean i already told you, but his vocals are so nice in this and they fit into the style of the song so well. plus africa is a beautiful song to begin with so its a win-win really

‘pour some sugar on me’ cause oh boy my pal isnt this song just banging mmmmmmMMMMM

and for the finale! ‘heat of the moment’! like. everything about this song is just really good okay? the vocals and especially the music itself is like mmm i love it?? also the cowbell. idk what it is with that in this song, but it just. it sounds so good with dan’s vocals and aaaaa

..have i rambled enough? is this a good list?? literally just mmm anything from any of these bands is a good listen, these are just mostly my personal faves or what i feel like would be the best representations of what they are about!

[drferox]

20 Questions with Dr Ferox #18

Finally sat down to work through 20 more questions. I know I’d been a bit behind for a while, but here comes a flurry of questions and comments. As usual I’ve tried to tag people that were brave enough to put their names on the questions, but if you were Anonymous you’ll have to look through manually.

@tenacious-brii said: Hi! I was wondering if you might have heard of the Orthopedic Foundation for Animals, and if you have, what you think of them. My understanding is they're working to implement a higher breeding standard to prevent inbreeding / continuation of genetic diseases and disorders (like hip dysplasia for example) It sounds like a worthy goal but maybe I am being hopelessly optimistic, lol. As for tax; Which pokemon would be your main companion? Thank you for all that you do!!

The OFA would love to implement higher standards for breeding dogs, but they can't actually enforce anything. All they can do is collect the data and make recommendations. They have some super interesting data on the frequency of hip and elbow dysplasia in dogs, but there are a few potential flaws.

Number one is that it's not compulsory for breeders to disclose their hip and elbow results. If they screen a dog with bad hips, for example, and simply choose not to send those results in, then the recorded 'breed average' will be 'better' than reality.

I do have a soft spot for Ivysaur.

savageborn said:  I met a pure bred St Bernard at work for the first time today (i work part time as a vet assistant at a small local clinic) and. I was taken aback. They're so big. I've never seen one in person before and im still just amazed. I wanted to share. He was very sweet just. So Big.

Yes, they are indeed very big. Super fun as puppies though, when at even their early puppy vaccination they're dwarfing adult dogs in the waiting room.

Anonymous said: Up until relatively recently (the 1980s!), it was widely accepted that human newborns didn't feel pain. I'm not surprised if that idea hasn't persisted when it comes to mice.

Gosh humans can be stubborn, self-centred and lacking in empathy, can't they? That was probably believed to make themselves feel a whole lot better about circumcision.

agender-fordmustang said: As a vet assistant, I find egg + meat chicken production to be very interesting, despite my disgust for birds who are bred so large they cant get up out of their own excreta. What's your favorite thing which you thought you'd hate?

I don't think I really expected to hate anything, I find most of biology genuinely fascinating. I find turkey semen collection a bit weird, but there's not much on the animal side I really hate.

Humans and the things we do are complicated. I wasn't really all that fond of humans when I started out, but have come to like a larger percentage of them over time.

Anonymous said: In regards to getting accepted to vet school, would you say grades were very important? Like would an A vs a B in a class make it or break it? Also do they look at extracurriculars as much as everyone tells me haha. Everyone loves to tell me how competitive vet school is and I've just started my undergrad education so I'm trying to evaluate my priorities! Thank you so much and thank you for running such a wonderful blog! <3

When I went through, and please remember it was over a decade ago when I was applying, they looked at your academic achievements first, and extracurriculars second, but if you didn't have any extracurricular experience with the veterinary industry you weren't looked on as favourably as if you did. By the interview stage, the professors had already more or less decided who they wanted as students, the interviews just sealed the deal and maybe bumped you higher or lower on the list.

Anonymous said: I have a condition where I have random and uncontrollable nose bleeds, at least once a day and lasting anywhere from a minute to an hour. I would like to have a job with animals or in the medical field but I am afraid my nose bleeds will be in excusable in a medical environment. Can someone like me work as a vet or other medical personal or am I better off finding something else?

To be honest, I'm not entirely sure how to answer this. There are definitely medical, infectious and sanitary concerns with having unpredictable nosebleeds. I'm not even sure how you're managing outside of a clinical setting, and I'm sorry I can't be more help.

Anonymous said: hello! i recently got a kitten to accompany the cat i already have (they get along wonderfully!) I was wondering though, we feed our cat purina kibble and have been feeding the kitten canned fancy feast- im planning on incorporating more wet food into the older cat's diet because i know cats get a majority of hydration from their food. anyway i know that the brands we feed them arent ideal, but we dont have a lot of money for otherwise. do you have any advice on better brands perhaps?

Cats are perfectly capable of drinking water, but I don't give people food recommendations. That's a slippery slope that I wont go down.

bettsplendens said: Am I right in thinking that "meat by-products" in the context of cat food probably means organ meat and miscellaneous scraps rather than anything actually ominous?

More or less. It can include any part of the animal that isn't profitable to market as a labelled something for human consumption. So while it might include lots of organs, it's less likely to include hearts, liver and tripe, which can be sold separately, and may also include things like neck and cheek meat is those cuts are not popular locally, or just edges of things that nobody wanted.

Anonymous said: Why do dogs have really short hiccup attacks? Are they hiding hiccup curing secrets from us?!

Dogs can have longer hiccup attacks, but their diets are usually more regular and they're less likely to be overfed than we are. They usually grow out of hiccups in puppyhood.

Anonymous said: How about when I worked at a pet store, I had to dissuade a man who wanted a remote shock collar for his wife's 3lb Yorkie. The smallest collar we carried was rated for 10lbs minimum. He said they'd go out to check on their cattle, and the dog would jump out of his arms and race towards the cows. He said he was concerned a cow would hurt her, and he just needed "something that would drop 'er." I suggested a leash. He said, "Nah, she don't like leashes."

Humans are capable of astounding levels of foolishness.

Anonymous said: Our dog recently had to have a large patch shaved on her side due to a wound. She is double-coated, and I've always heard you shouldn't shave a double-coated dog because the coat won't grow back the same. Is this true? Obviously it's better that it was shaved or the vet wouldn't have done it, but I want to make sure this won't affect her ability to be in the sun in the future and all that jazz. (btw we love our vet to bits, but she can be a bit hard to reach for simple questions)

It will grow back eventually (assuming no endocrinopathies affecting the fur), but the guard hairs will take longer to grow back and look like they did before shaving. It's only a part of the dog that's been shaved, so unlikely to be an issue.

Anonymous: What sorts of things do vet assistants do on the job? (I'm trying to figure out if being a vet assistant is something I actually want to do or if I just think that I want to do it because I like animals) Also question tax, what's your favorite kind of flower? Thanks!

Considering Vet Assistant is not a regulated term here, it might be anything from a layperson with no training just doing what a vet instructs them to do, to being basically a vet nurse. I do not work with vet assistants, I work with trained vet nurses, so you will get a better answer asking someone who actually works under that title.

Anonymous said: Not sure if this has been asked already but one of my cat's tails vibrates and shakes. She does it all the time. I'm not necessarily concerned, but is this normal in cats?

It can be if the cat is highly stimulated or agitated.

Anonymous said: A short story for you: ever since he was little my cat has done the claw kneading thing to my hair and dribbles while doing it. It's so weird but now it's just normal to me. I assume it's just his quirk it's cute

A lot of cats will salivate while purring and kneading. It's probably a reflex left over from kittenhood, when they would knead their mother while suckling.

Anonymous said: I'm worried about my dog's bite since he is a show dog. So far he has the normal scissor bite but it seems like it's turning to a level bite. He has reached his adult height and is a bit over 1 year old. Are the jaws supposed to grow anymore?

Probably not but it might depends on breed and I can neither see nor examine your dog, and you are anonymous.

Anonymous said: question tax: for some reason i imagine that cattle really love you!? like just licking your face and trying to lay in your lap. i just get that vibe!! question: so my dog is missing a few molars for some reason. our vet says it isn't a problem and he eats perfectly well. it's got me thinking about the dogs that have missing teeth and end up with their tongues hanging out of their mouths. what causes that? my pup doesn't do it but there's a pretty obvious gap.

Dogs that are missing canine teeth often have tongues that deviate and pop out. It's more common in brachycephalic dogs, which have long tongues relative to their face anyway.

I miss cows.

Anonymous said: I work at a pet store and frequently have to deal with people who own wheezing pugs thinking "oh he just makes that sound when he's happy", do you have any advice for convincing them that their dog isn't healthy and needs to see a vet? Question tax: came for the vet stories, stayed for the vet stories, your blog is fantastic!

I tend to say something along the lines of how something might be common and been present for a long time, but that doesn't mean it's healthy. Or that something might have been normalised but that doesn't make it normal.

prepackagedsoul said:I've had two German Shepherds (so I've spent some time at the vet, like you said a lot went wrong with them but i did do everything possible to fix it) and for now I've switched over to cats and, holy shit? Like they're so hardy and long lasting my grandmother has a cat that is 20 years old. She also owns one of her kittens, and he's nineteen. They're both still pretty active too, so I guess I'll bury this cat when I'm forty if all goes well.

Cats are great. They want to live, they heal well, they're tough little buggers.

aquila-audax said: Steering away from vet medicine but still within the wonderful realm of the life sciences, do you have a favourite species/group of plants?

I am partial to foxgloves. Partly for their appearance, but also because I like foxy things and they're poisonous in a cool way.

vantastrophe said: Any fantasy authors you really enjoy? Looking for more books to read, I really like Neil Gaiman but that's the only author so far ? hope you're having a great week!

Terry Pratchett is my #1, forever and always.