#cannot believe this was me trying to be CONCISE you could write a whole book of meta analysis about her character alone.

[meteortrails]

saw someone somewhere say ‘idk what the story in cass becoming Batman would be’ and literally since that day I’ve thought about it. NON FUCKING STOP. I’m on an amusement park ride where the operator has not only refused to let me off but wholesale left the fucking building. bc fundamentally, Cass becoming Batman is a culmination of her choosing her own ideals and beliefs and rejecting those she was raised with, and it is also Cass learning new dimensions and strengths within herself. it’s both a logical next step and a transformation of what it means to be Batman, what Cass is capable of as a hero, what Cass is capable of as a PERSON.

to tackle this from one angle to begin with: to be Batman is to be the lynchpin of Gotham’s vigilante and crime scene. to be Batman is to be the sun around which everything else orbits, the gravity well that distorts everyone else’s behavior. you are responsible for both Gotham as whole, and wrangling/keeping tabs on/assembling all the personalities therein. Cass is someone who is so fiercely independent that I think this could become a really fun point of conflict in her Batman run! she’s only ever been a member of the team or an independent agent, she’s never been RUNNING HERD on everyone else.

how does her relationship with Barbara and her siblings change as a result of these shifting roles? how does she grow into these new responsibilities?? these are things that take her out of her reliable comfort zone of martial ability and explore the way her strengths translate into different arenas; her ability to read body language is something that will both serve her well and trip her up as she learns the shape of her new role (think that one episode of Wayne family adventures - you can see what people are feeling, that doesn’t mean you know how best to react to it). this all also allows a reinforcement of a fundamental truth: Cass’s strength and value both as a person and as Batman has so little to do with her physical capabilities and everything to do with her strength of conviction and commitment to doing good.

now, building off of that and also coming in from a different angle: as Cass becomes Batman, her relationship not only with her siblings will change, but with the roles that they inhabit. she’s an adult who is discovering new depths of what she is capable of and prepared to be responsible for - how does this shape her relationship with the mantle of Robin? it’s something that could be a really interesting later plot point, is her finding that connection that Bruce did to the children of Gotham, and finding her feet as a mentor and a guardian to the next generation. show me Cass rediscovering the ways in which her guardians failed her through her attempts to do right by those she has tasked herself to take care of. show me Cass trying to set these new generations free of the cycles of violence that have defined her life, even as she herself struggles to even find self worth outside of them.

and to look at that from yet another angle, there is an incredibly poignant story here about Cass finding herself as she takes on the symbol that she chose and makes it her own. she rejected the ideals she was raised with because she realized that she, as a person, values human life above all else. she choose the symbol of the bat because it reflected those ideals, and in doing so she chose Bruce as her father, and his family and ideals as the ones she will let hold sway in her life. her becoming Batman would be a commitment to that choice and to her core values, and I think any storyline worth it’s salt would at least on some level be about Cass seeing and learning to believe that the traits she values so much in Batman are things that are intrinsic to who she is as a person. she doesn’t need to contort herself to fit other’s expectations of what Batman should do or act like or look like or be good at, she just needs to be her, because Cass already is and was always going to be an embodiment of exactly what the Bat symbolizes. she doesn’t need to sacrifice herself to be perfect! she just needs to be herself!!! that’s valuable enough all on its own!!!!!

and if all of that wasn’t enough to convince you on its own, any story about Cass acting as a bat is a continuation of the idea that like. everyone who has ever been even a little bit important to you has shaped you, whether you liked them and wanted them to or not. and you’ll never truly escape that influence, but that doesn’t mean you’re a slave to it either. so many people have tried to twist Cass to their agendas, but none of them can ever change or touch who she is as a person. once you acknowledge the impact someone has had on you, you also have the power to respond to and determine the shape of that impact, and Cass is such a beautiful example of that! David Cain and lady shiva may have raised her and shaped her, but she’s her own person, and she gets to decide what of that influence she takes with her going forward bc at the end of the day she’s the master of her own life!! how is that not some of the coolest shit you’ve EVER HEARD.

anyways. in conclusion. there’s all KINDS of story folded into the idea of Cass becoming Batman, she’s so fucking amazing. can someone please let me off the carnival ride now.

[gunkreads]

I did end up finishing Baptism of Fire this week. I kinda... don't have much to say about it (future gunk here: don't believe his lies). I've gotten to the point with the Witcher series where it's very reliant on reader buy-in. I'd almost say this is a natural consequence of the concept of "a series", but this feels different.

The following phrasing tends toward the negative a lot. That tone doesn't reflect my feelings on the book; I liked it quite a bit. I just think the negative tone kind of illustrates my point better. Also I'm kind of a hater so it's my natural writing voice.

I think a lot of book series tend to evolve and come into their own, so to speak, as they progress (that feels inane to even say). The Witcher is, on the surface, no different--it really does continue to move along the tracks it sets for itself in the short stories and earlier books. It starts to add curves and bumps to those tracks, though, in that it starts to feel like the author (slash translator, for me) is kind of side-eyeing you for a reaction to any given story beat, then seeing that it didn't make you quit reading and tweaking the gears behind the curtain a little.

It's like it's a subtle satire of the concept of reader investment. Instead of using buy-in as a tool to facilitate progressively moving toward a unique ideal of the author's, as I find most stories do, it seems to use buy-in as a go-ahead to redefine that "unique ideal". This is a bad explanation. I'm trying really hard to put it into words. It's not that the series is wishy-washy or disrespectful of your time--it's both clear and concise--but it definitely seems like it's constantly asking you to reassess its structure from top to bottom.

If I had to really reach for a solid explanation, I'd say this is best represented by the traveling sequences. In Baptism of Fire, the story that Geralt lives is completely stagnant in relation to his goals as a person. He's trying to find Ciri. He makes, and I cannot stress this enough, literally zero progress. He's just fuckin' walkin' places. He makes some friends, loses some friends, makes more friends, finds the ones he lost... etc. The parts of the book focused on him are about assessing who he is as a character and how his goals are misaligned with the methods he believes he has to use to achieve them--namely, that he can't find Ciri alone. He has to go through like a hundred revelations and a couple quasi-apotheoses before actually getting the guts to ask his incredibly loyal friends and companions for help. It's almost funny, and it's a very fun example of how deep emotional change could happen in an old and very, very, deeply sad guy, but it necessarily takes a long fucking time!

This constant feeling of stumbling forward on a treadmill really leaves me feeling like Sapkowski & translator are asking me to put the book down and write an essay about Geralt's character. Which I guess I'm doing, so... Andrzej, one point for you, I fucking guess.

For real though, this book series feels like it's toeing the line of what can be called "pretension". Is it pretentious to insert tone into your book that makes the reader feel like they're being asked to deeply analyze a character? I'd say yeah, it probably is, and I love that shit, but... there is a lot to say about Geralt! He's not devoid of meaning! He just doesn't have THAT much meat to him.

I can still wholeheartedly recommend the Witcher books to anyone who loves gritty low fantasy--it's pretty close to being a paragon of the genre--and I do think Baptism of Fire was probably the most fun book in the series so far, but I really wanted to talk about this weird feeling I had the whole time while reading it.

I also might be hallucinating.

[hotchley]

sadness

Right, my laptop is at 12% and I need to cross-post to ao3 and go to sleep because I have one more mock tomorrow, so I’ll try and keep this one short.

My post earlier sparked this. I am now writing a series called “he blinks” which explores how Hotch feels each of the eight core emotions (and probably love, because I am nothing if not a sucker for Hotch and Haley.) Anyways... sadness is first. But it’s more like grief? So... it’s set after 100, and yeah :) There’s no dialogue, and I think this counts as introspection, but I don’t know...

I had more to say, but I can’t remember so... onwards! It’s relatively short, 1272 words, so I hope it’s okay. I’ve not touched most of my WIPs since whenever I last uploaded a fic, and it’s more just me rambling so yeah.. go with it

Trigger Warnings: death, grief, the slightest implication of child abuse (please let me know if I’ve missed anything, but I think this is it)

read on ao3!

Aaron Hotchner’s sadness is quiet.

That’s what Haley’s death teaches the BAU.

Penelope’s sadness is happiness that seems too loud, too much, too forced and perfect to be anything but a terrible attempt at masking something negative. 

JJ’s sadness is socially acceptable: she cries, she accepts the comfort, and then she stitches herself back together before anyone can wonder why one sentence wasn’t able to fix her.

Derek’s sadness is a fierce protectiveness over the people he loves most, because they are the thing that keeps him going and remind him of all the reasons to try his best to cope and move on and deal.

Spencer’s is an unusual thing, that is somehow vulnerable and closed-off in the same moment. He will shed his tears openly, sometimes not even realising that is what he is doing, but he recoils at the slightest glimmer of support.

Emily’s is hidden behind stupid jokes that can’t even raise the corners of her mouth and stories from a childhood that she still can’t quite wrap her head around serve as a coping mechanism, because if she cannot go back to that blissful ignorance then she will remind herself it exists.

Dave’s is an explosive thing that showcases itself as anger and a closed office door. The team always knows when he’s sad. He won’t accept comfort from anyone in the moment, but an unspoken apology is given to everyone in the form of a meal when he’s thinking rationally.

But Aaron’s sadness is quiet and unsuspecting.

The team had never realised that. They’d never been allowed to. 

When Dave recruited him to the team, he was too busy keeping him alive to realise how quiet Aaron could be. 

When Derek joined, Aaron was too busy with keeping him in check and making sure he was safe. 

And when Reid, Garcia and JJ joined, only a few months between each of them, Hotch had been forced to take the reins from Gideon and would not let anyone see him break.

Emily accused him of not being human enough, despite remembering the boy that had worked for her mother and hadn’t quite learnt how to hide the flinch that was reflexive with every slam of a door, and who wore his heart on his sleeve without even realising, so she never saw him break. Until Foyet.

His sadness crept up on them.

They would go hours, sometimes even days, convinced that he was fine. That he was coping, and moving forward, and okay. It was stupid and wishful thinking, they knew that, but they also believed that Hotch was perfect and invincible. 

Reid thought he never blinked. JJ still remembers how he never seemed to lose it.

They would assume he was fine.

And then he wouldn’t smile at something. Or he would, but it would be a shadow of his usual joy and childish excitement. Or it wouldn’t quite reach his eyes, which would remain just as hollow and unfocused and dull as the day of the funeral. Or it would seem to cause him pain to even try.

He would suddenly shove his hands in his pockets. As though he could still feel the blood of Foyet, mixed with his own because Foyet was not and never had been weak, tainting it, despite all the care Derek applied when he wiped them clean. As though he was still in that house, terrified his son would hate him for taking his mother away. As though he couldn’t look at them without seeing the monster he had always known he would eventually become.

Or his voice would soften, just a little too much. His tone would change completely, and the person he was talking to would feel like a child going to the one person that always made them feel safe and seeing someone that could only try to be that good instead. His words would become quieter. Less concise. More calculated. Like he was walking the line between control and destruction.

There would be hesitation. Hotch’s confidence was often a facade, but it was a facade so strong that it even convinced profilers. Morgan had hated it when he first joined, scared his new boss was going to be someone that would stand up and play devil's advocate, but then he had realised the truth: he was just scared of being undermined. Reid had admired it then, and he admired it now. 

He would hesitate, and it would remind them of everything he had lost. He would hesitate with his gun, and Morgan would panic because they had lost Gideon to the job, they couldn’t lose him too. He would hesitate with his pen, and Reid would frown, because Hotch’s reports were used for the trainees as perfect examples, and every word that he wrote himself was modelled after the reports from Hotch he had read after starting.

He would hesitate to touch his son and JJ would weep inside because she knew what it was like to be a child and to have a parent that wasn’t quite whole, knowing that there was nothing you could do to fix the situation because you weren’t the person they wanted.

There would be a slight clearing of his throat before he addressed the team about a case involving mothers, women, children, blondes. He would turn away, and one hand would quickly and furiously wipe at his eyes, before he turned back and acted like he was made of steel.

They would all see him reach for his phone on the harder cases, then freeze and place his hand elsewhere like his pocket was burning him. Dave, Derek, and even JJ would try and mention it, but Aaron always acted like he had no idea what they were talking about. Spencer and Penelope can’t even try and ask how he is before he starts distracting them with some random knowledge about their interests.

Neither genius is oblivious to what he was trying to do. They pretend to be for his sake.

Aaron’s sadness is not the explosion of grief the shows and movies had taught them to prepare for. It is not the beautiful road to healing the poems had caused them to hope for. It is not the simple and painless, cured by a single sleep event the books always make it out to be.

Aaron’s sadness is tired eyes, dark circles, shaking hands. It is sobs stifled at the most random and unplanned time. It is blank stares during conversations and it is slight smiles that expose his brain as being a million miles away. It is the sight of his left hand with a tan line where the ring had been removed two years ago.

It is the team, the family that wants nothing more to fix everything and make him better, having no idea what they are meant to do to help the man that has always held them and cradled them and protected them. It is them feeling like they have made a mistake with every unanswered text. It is the bitter acceptance that all they can do is hold him together until he is ready to take the first step.

It is Aaron Hotchner, not even knowing what he needs anymore and being too afraid to ask for words of assurance and love. It is Aaron Hotchner wearing his wedding ring to feel like a piece of Haley is still real and alive. It is Aaron Hotchner feeling lost and angry and numb and bitter and relieved all at once.

It is all of this. And yet somehow, it is still quiet.

[sophrosinn]

the (un)lucky ones

story description:

“the story’s great, but I think it would be better if the story ended like this”

Affronted at the audacity of the comment, she furiously replies, “then write your own story, asshole!”

word count: 2,048

a/n: happiest solar anniversary to one of my best girls @vanaera! thank you for being the bestest friend a girl could ever ask for. this short story, which is loosely based irl, serves as my gift to you. i hope you’ll like it! 

shout-out to @senfleurs for being the best gal and helping me out with this. she even stepped up and edited this omg, and i cannot stress how much I’m thankful, lol especially she made sure that I get to finish this on time

—

3.

In retrospect, she knows better than to let some dumb comment, especially from someone on the Internet, rile her up this much. Even her followers tell her as much: it’s unwarranted, insensitive even. One of her followers, hippopopo tries to take it a step further, justifying by saying, verbatim: It’s her story anyway!!! So only she knows how the story should end best, okay! 😤😠💢

(in actuality, she has qualms about that, mostly because she had read some books which she thought didn’t end well. but that would take time to unpack and this story isn’t about that, no. she’s flattered at the support, nonetheless.)

And yet, there she is at 8 in the morning, her fingers furiously gliding across her keyboard as she writes a spite-filled story in response. Oftentimes, her muse for writing comes from movies she watched with her family, or from songs she heard on Korean dramas, or those meet-cute scenarios she gushed about with her best friends. This time, however, spite’s her main gal.

She finishes at 10. Later at 4 in the afternoon, she posts it. About an hour later, she doesn’t even try to contain the smirk lighting up her face when a familiar notification pops up.

—

1.

The story starts with an inconspicuous like from a user named agust-d five months ago. Back then, she thought nothing of it. A day later, agust-d comments on a story from her drabble series. Since then, every day without fail, agust-d leaves a small token of their appreciation for her works; brief, concise comments such as, “nice job on the flower descriptions,” or “i liked it.” 

Belatedly, she wonders if agust-d is a person of few words, because why else would they leave comments with only six words or less, even on her works with over 30k words? Don’t get her wrong, of course she’s eternally grateful for all the support she receives from her affectionate dears. But sometimes, especially on days her self-confidence plummets and she’s in need of reassurance, she ponders if all her efforts are for naught. (of course not, never, she gently reminds herself.)

And each day, she resists the growing urge to reply: don’t you have anything more to say!!! (but alas, she isn’t a rude person—unless provoked—she can’t so she settles with letting her mind wander.)

Three months of this and she finally caves in. With her interest piqued, she browses through agust-d’s posts. After two hours, she learns that agust-d goes by suga online. Coincidentally, Suga is a male student at the same university she’s currently attending. For a moment, she briefly considers a possibility—what are the chances that they’ve met, have fallen into step alongside each other, have passed by him in the large hallways, or have shared her table with him at the library during exam season? The possibility of knowing someone without actually knowing them? 

(that’s the funny thing about the online world, she supposes. you may know all that matters about someone: their likes, dislikes, kinks, fears, and horrid taste in music, absolutely everything except that one thing that matters the most: their names.)

Suga, she eventually learns, is not a man of few words. In truth, he’s got a few words too many to say about a diverse range of controversial topics. In his words, his passion burns bright and clear, but for her, he doesn’t shine any brighter than when he talks about music. It shows in his blog, which consists of a myriad of album reviews across different genres (fascinating, she notes, their music interests align as well).

Occasionally, he posts his renditions of some popular rap music, and as sporadic as this happens, she admits that his covers are her favorite part of his blog. And naturally, she refuses to acknowledge that it has everything to do with her fascination with deep, raspy voices, which, (un)fortunately for her, Suga undoubtedly has.

After some serious debating with herself, she decides to not follow him back. But she makes sure to check his profile every other day for no real reason, really, her soul wallowing in denial. In her defense, when did anyone need a reason to stalk someone?

And so, it begins, her fascination with this stranger on the other side of the screen. Never in her whole life did she imagine herself harboring a (teeny-tiny, infinitesimal) crush towards someone on the Internet. Certainly, she knows there’s always a one-in-a-thousand chance that it happens in real life, it’s just that out of all the 7 billion people in the world, she wasn’t expecting herself to be the (un)lucky one.

—

2.

The fateful day begins like any other. She wakes up to a brand new day, at 7 am, and like clockwork, she begins to stretch atop her pink yoga mat. Halfway through her workout, her phone pings with a new notification. Immediately, her phone screen lights up: agust-d has left a comment on your work!

Her traitorous heart skips a beat in the utmost display of betrayal. It’s Suga!

Ever since she scrolled through his blog two months ago, she has been exchanging messages with Suga. Her covert mission to surreptitiously listen to his song covers ends miserably when she accidentally double-clicks on a post he made two years ago. A string of expletives followed as she stared agonizingly at the post. She attempts to remove her blunder, but soon accepts defeat as it doesn’t even take a full minute until she receives a message notification from Suga. The internal debate resumes as her finger clumsily hovers on the computer mouse and she hesitantly clicks. From thereon, the rest, as they say, is history.

She ends up following his account the day after.

Although, if she were being truthful, all they’ve been sending back and forth are pleasantries. Suga seems hellbent on keeping the conversations polite and distant. She doesn’t understand, it’s not like she’s flirting with him! All she just wants is a compelling conversation with someone (because the Lord knows how much she needs an intellectual to talk to; and suga seems like an intellectual, if his posts are anything to go by).

She unlocks her phone and throws herself onto her bed. Normally, her lips quirk up automatically in response to seeing his name pop on her notifications, but it is not the case for this time. Instead, a frown mars her forehead as she reads his comment.

agust-d: the story’s great, but I think it would be better if the story ended like this

For a moment, she can’t believe her eyes. She blinks a few more times in the hope that her eyes were just playing tricks on her. Nada, it remains the same. 

If there’s one thing to know about her, it’s that she meticulously plans out every detail in her stories. She even spends weeks to outline a draft, and even then, it must be decent enough before she puts it in writing. Publishing her works online, for all the world to see, still intimidates her even after all this time. Not knowing how people will respond to her works frightens her, but what is life without a little fear?

In addition, she’s receptive to constructive criticisms, but criticisms that come from those she looks up to? It’s a bitter pill to swallow sometimes. Suga—he’s become one of those people, and seeing his comment really hurt. She turns her phone off and does her chores for the time being. The moment she logs back in, she is taken aback by the multitude of comments expressing the same sentiment. 

bubbleboy: “Yeah, I agree, I think it would be best if the story ended in this manner.” 

She can’t help but feel the bubble of anger gradually rising. Another even started with, 

orange-gloss: “No offense, but the ending being suggested by others is kinda good.” 

The audacity and the entitlement in this comment! Asking her to not be offended when it is within her right to take offense is absolutely laughable. Furthermore, who are you to even tell me how I should react? 

When she reaches the 20th comment, she explodes. The next two hours find her furiously typing out a decent response disguised as a story, albeit with passive-aggressiveness, addressed to all of the comments, but primarily to the one left by Suga. She talks to the rude commenters with the sweet addition of a phrasing 101 lesson. In her contained rage, she ends with the note: remember, it doesn’t hurt to be nice, and if you have qualms about how I ended my own story, do me and yourself a favor and write your own story!

She makes up her mind to take some time off her blog for a while. But after a familiar notification pops up at 5 PM, she resists the urge to run away and instead, opts to open the messages he sent.

agust-d: i’ll admit, the way I said it was rude

agust-d: but I stand with what I said

agust-d: you should consider the possibility as well

seen

(In hindsight, she realizes that, for once, Suga’s comment surpasses 25 words.)

—

4. 

After the whole debacle with the barrage of rude comments and her consequent outburst, everything has never been the same. Understandably, some of her fans have left since then, but the majority stayed with her and for that, she’s eternally grateful. Although she still publishes her stories and interacts with her followers, a certain emptiness fills her at times. 

A part of her thinks it has a lot to do with Suga, who she doesn’t talk to anymore. She… doesn’t know how to respond to him after her outburst. In a span of a moment, she manages to both defend her honor and drag agust-d through the mud, which was never her intention to begin with. Okay, well, maybe just a little bit. But she’s hurt, so it only makes sense to retaliate.

If only she could easily strike back in her current situation. 

Unbeknownst to her, someone with the handle void-mayo tags her on a malicious post the night before, calling her out for being fake. Apparently, she’s a ‘copycat writer wanna-be with no real ideas of her own.’

She only discovers it when her followers start sending her messages of reassurance and appreciation. Of course, she checks the post at once, reading carefully and taking in everything that was written. (Shit, at least I have a better username, she muses). And not for the first time, she feels hurt, uneasy, and anxious at the same time. Void-mayo is already an established writer, with years of exposure under her belt and a large army of rabid fans at her disposal. Meanwhile, she’s just started her writing blog. And although she’s diligent, thorough, and ensures that each of her stories has its own personality and flavor, most of void-mayo’s fans wouldn’t care. She can’t risk losing her credibility over a baseless accusation such as this! 

And with that, she feels anger bubbling from the pit of her stomach. She doesn’t get the purpose behind the destructive post. She gets humiliated, her reputation tarnished, and worse just because she had written a similar scene with an ice cream . It certainly doesn’t help that others are quick to join in calling her names and ‘cancelling her’ without even bothering to check the facts. 

And as she contemplates on how to proceed with such a delicate situation, her dashboard refreshes. At the top, she notices that agust-d reblogs void-mayo’s post with the addition of his response and for once, the word count exceeds 100.

—

5. 

In a roundabout way of saying sorry and expressing her gratitude, she proceeds to write the ending Suga requested. And illuminated by the dim light of her laptop screen, she can begrudgingly admit that he does have a point; his version of the ending does make sense.

—

fin.

—

omake

agust-d: so am i forgiven yet?

you: i don’t know

you: maybe you’ll have to make it up to me

you: and get me some coffee first?

you: 😉

—

a/n pt. 2: happiest birthday to you again! i’m so grateful to have met you in this lifetime. truly, like you’re the best. even if your internet connection’s always shitty, you always find ways to join our chats and discord parties. just thank you, for all the countless laughs that i’ve had with (and because of) you, for the counsel with my writing, and for the stories and advice you’ve willingly shared with us. here’s to our three years of friendship and counting! i love you so much! enjoy this day and stay safe! 

p.s. keep rocking and keep writing! we’ll always be here with you! muah! ❤️❤️❤️

p.p.s. hihi 🦆🍄

[homosexualcolombus]

christopher loses his marbles (or why i’ve decided to start blogging)

even though prodonktivity is a social construct, my irls on social media seem to be obssessed with it, so i found myself subscribing to this mythical school of thought because the hive mind is real for dumb bitches like me who are unable to think for themselves. since then, i wasn't able to do something without me questioning myself whether it's actually productive or not. which is annoying, because really, who the fuck cares?

and anyway, what constitutes an activity as productive? what exactly are the parameters of "productivity" and how the hell do you quantify that shit?

i had so many questions.

i have this much needed break from being in the academe and yet here i am figuring out how to spend my time in a way that would be deemed acceptable to the capitalistic zombie society who's wired to do nothing but work, work, work. by no means am i being held at gunpoint to actually *BE* productive, i've just been a tiny bit brainwashed, but in the end it is still my prerogative to participate. the onus is on me to deal with how to go about it.

so why blogging? one might ask, and the answer is incredibly simple: i like to write... even though the process is an incredibly stressful, aggravating, and frustrating experience. be it that i may have read too many books during my adolescent years and had no one to tell me writing is not as therapeutic as i thought it would be, then maybe i wouldn't have considered doing this today. however, i have been putting my foot on the gas pedal of this writing thing for too long that i have honestly no idea how to stop it without it ending in a fatal crash. years and years worth of works ranging from cringy softboy poems to fanfics of heterosexual korean boybands whose sole career focus is to capitalize on queerbaiting naive, innocent pubescent teens prove that fact. i AM in this for the long haul.

yes, i could have chosen to churn out another 20k words worth of abo smut of kim junmyeon and oh sehun but what exactly does that achieve? (except deposit more material for depraved faggots like me's spank banks?) i would like to believe i could contribute something more important to society than writing about suho getting rawdogged in some department store fitting room because he conveniently "forgot" to take his heat suppressants. i would like to think i'm better than that (i am NOT, but a boy can dream).

but as i sat down to write what i hoped would be a movement-inspiring blog post, my brain immediately went blank. dumb and dumber refused to cooperate. as much as i would have loved for this blog to be filled with revolutionary political thinkpieces, dumb and dumber's outcries of needing a space to be unapologetically stupid was too enticing.  twitter is all well and good a platform for the same purpose but of course, i am a hag who cannot keep things concise.

so here we are.

if at any point in reading do u feel like an old hag is rambling at you, you're right and that is absolutely valid. despite my initial intentions of what these blogs are supposed to be, in the process of writing i have discovered the nirvana that is the catharsis of letting my thoughts stream freely onto the page. contrary to what i used to believe, writing is indeed therapeutic! hallelujah, i have finally seen the light. no more ass-clenching nights spent trying so hard to write junmyeon being knotted by 8 different men and pumped full of cum as descriptively as possible. AND it gets better because i even get to post these useless stuff under the guise of being productive because the "collective" thinks blogging is acceptable!

let's be real, not many people will read my blogs, and the few that will, will certainly have those that cannot fully comprehend the whole mess. for the most part, these will be enshrined in vague, unclicked "new blog" instagram story posts, facebook statuses, and tweets that serve to solidify my status as an upstanding, productive member of our society. each post will be my "fuck you" to all the karens who say "fake it till you make it" after peer pressuring you by subtly flexing everything they've achieved during the quarantine. you can all suck my fat productive cock.

[bjnurse]

I have generalized anxiety, so, any ideas for take care of myself?

Hello Sweet Anon! 💕 If we’re going to talk about this, then we’re going to do it right! 💕

Content Warning: Mental Health 

Firstly: I am not a mental health professional. Any advice I give is from my own experience. I cannot promise that what works for me is going to work for you because we are different individuals. But I hope that what I talk about here will help you or help inspire your own path. 

Secondly: Please Please PLEASE if you are in need, go seek professional help. Talk to your school counselor, or nurse. Talk to Human Resources at work. Talk to your doctor. These people can direct you to getting proper help. And most importantly YOU DO NOT NEED TO STRUGGLE WITH THIS ALONE. Also, Mental Health issues can be considered an emergency - go to an emergency room if it gets to that point.

Thirdly: This takes work and time. Mental Health and Self Love are both a constant practice. Try a few different things and see what works for you. Don’t give up! Some days are going to be good and some days are going to be bad. This is just how we work as human beings. The bad days don’t mean you fail or have taken a step back. Keep moving forward and remember to be kind to yourself. 

💕 YOU ARE WORTH THE WORK!!! 💕

I have generalized anxiety and social anxiety. I occasionally get intrusive thoughts and depersonalization. [This is all on and off. I don’t have all of these at the same time.] I was struggling with paranoia when my anxiety it got really bad. That’s when I finally decided to seek professional help. That was the best decision I ever made. Therapy gives you the tools to deal with or work on your anxiety. It is up to you to do the work. I’ll say this again - you are worth every second of it. 

If you can, build a support group. Talking about what you’re experiencing can be helpful. And they can help keep you accountable. (This does not replace speaking to a professional.) Talk to friends or family who will support you. 

Anxiety is a fight or flight response. Our brain is firing saying something is wrong- time to run or time to fight. When you’re in this moment, take a step back and analyze where you are. You’re most likely in a safe place, not in danger for your life. (If you’re in actual danger, get out of there!) I was given a worksheet from my therapist to fill out at these moments. You write out the following: 1. Situation- what is actually happening, what are you doing? 2. Emotions and Body Reactions- What are you experiencing? 3. Anxious thoughts- what’s going through your mind? 4. Coping- What can you do moving forward? This is a process. You will start to see a pattern with your anxiety. And you will be able to find triggers that you will be able to avoid. [A whole other topic worth going into at some point, but believe it or not, I’m trying to be concise.] Taylor a process to handle your anxiety. You have to figure out the cause before you can figure out what to do about it. [We can also talk about mindfulness which I could write a book on!]

I find journaling extremely useful! When my mind is racing and running in circles I write down my thoughts. My brain is trying hard to work on something. I will write down everything I think, every fear or worry. Then I look at it. What am I really worried about? Is this something that can realistically happen? Is this something that my brain just made up? I try to take the threat out of my anxiety.

I highly highly suggest meditation! As you practice it and learn to do it, you will be able to calm your mind and your body when anxiety flares up. There’s youtube videos on guided meditations and even apps like Headspace. 

I had to basically stop looking at anxiety as something that I fight against. There is no winning in this battle. Anxiety is a companion riding shotgun in my car of life. Sometimes it’s asleep. Sometimes it has its feet up on the dash and sing really loudly. I just have to figure out what works for me to get it to shut the fuck up so I can drive. 

[fortheheavenssake]

PG MM Anon Interpretation Collection- 10

65: Sept. 20

💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻PG INTERPRETATION OF MM ANON🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜

💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻THANK YOU MM ANON HAVE AN AWESOME WEEKEND 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜

MM Anon

MM ANON … it’s a bird’ it’s a private plane ‘ it’s an Archificial!!!!!…… Canada why?…… three weddings and a numeral …… an unnecessary company …… not buying the lying ……” Rome , Bloody Rome!!”…………” one makes ones bed Philip”…… tabloids ‘ mud sticks, it’s official!!…… hated ‘ not rated …… This spotty leopard is def!! …… “ To boldly go……… “

it’s a bird’ it’s a private plane ‘ it’s an Archificial!!!!!

It’s Superman!!! Was the original third part. The ever elusive doll baby with magic powers to change size, hair colour, eyes, eyelashes etc etc all while wearing a Christening gown🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂 Again MM ANON are you confirming this? Private planes have been used because as we all know, there is no baby in her care, it’s always been a doll, and/or actors getting on/off private planes and or going to their local. For some reason EJ and ED are lying! Allegedly.

Canada why?

Canada Dry🤣🤣🤣😂😂MM ANON are you teasing me because l didn’t know that rare song🤣🤣😂😂? Seriously, l wonder if this is about Cameron Ortis and enquiring why Canada’s issue occurred and who was given what information.

three weddings and a numeral

Movie Three Weddings and a Funeral. Interestingly the write Richard Curtis is working with Catherine DOC , a new mental health initiative. It was in the paper the other day, if l recall there was a suicide he experienced, sibling? I cannot recall exactly. So Three weddings and a numeral. Let’s review what a numeral is, its a figure, symbol, or group of these denoting a number. MM ANON are you affirming something for us? Oh pretty please!!

Madam alleged annulled 1st marriage, divorced second and PH was the golden door number three, let’s make a deal, who remembers that game show? Does numeral represent a part of the law which denotes annulment and was it done legally? We know the divorce was legal because TE has remarried or is engaged. Oh my stars, are we getting affirmation?l have said awhile now why did PH hold the book when he was ‘signing’ the register after the wedding ceremony, he held the book so the camera couldn’t see it. Oh this clue has me buzzing! I know it’s can’t be III. Roman numeral three for three weddings they have attended as a married couple, the horrible blue and white dress, Princess Eugenie and Jack B and now MN?

an unnecessary company

Is this the Sussex Foundation? They could have worked as a team with the Cambridges but her jealousy and craving of $$$$$££££££££€€€€€ far supersedes any philanthropic or truly real humanitarianism.

not buying the lying

No one is believing anything she says or does except sugars and celebrities who share management or SS PR.

” Rome , Bloody Rome!!”

Again PP, disgust continues to rile his anger. Raging at yet another trip, how many flights is this now in six weeks or so? If they are all true it must be close to ten. He is a strong man, served his country for decade upon decade, to see this madam, l cannot imagine his blood pressure!

” one makes ones bed Philip”

HMTQ and PP , or maybe LG, the phrase you made your bed, now lie on it. This means your life choices have consequences and you have to deal with them The speaking if first person here, in a manner, leads me to believe this is HMTQ talking to her husband and the incredible burden of a booty call turning into this horrendous mess and PH playing his role, in his due to HMTQ, his grandmother is him having to deal with his poor choice. We still love and pray for him, as do his family. It must be desperately hard to watch him , but it will all be worth it, once justice is served, and make no mistake, it may not be tomorrow or next week, it will come! My word for madam, she will not understand this but Ask not for whom the bell tolls, for it tolls for the.

tabloids ‘ mud sticks, it’s official!!

Monster Meghan nanny tells all, TMZ shows fake photos of pub visit days and days after it allegedly happened, the pub owners denied they were there, the meta data on the photo said it was taken September 17,2019. More and more in the tabloids both paper and online tabloids, the truth is coming out and people are believing it more and more thus the term the mud sticks. MM ANON, the other riddle you used ‘ stick and stones’may break my bones, but names will never hurt me. I added the rest, after the part she mentioned. So in this case, the ‘names’ which in fact is truth are most definitely hurting her already bad reputation. Way to go SS!! You’re really earning your $$$$£££££€€€€! NOT !😂😂😂😂🤣

hated ‘ not rated

If one goes by social media et al, she doesn’t rate as a royal, but oh my the level of absolute disgust, anger, has built into hatred. Rightfully so, she blew in, rather flew in on her 🧹, paid backers. Manipulated a marriage, a ‘fauxmegnancy’, wastage of money on an epic scale, disrespecting the British and Commonwealth every step of the way. Trying to Americanize the Royal family and the biggest of all is the complete vile disrespect to HMTQ. To me, all the misdeeds, ? maybe illegal, those are all left for LG to manage. The thing of HMTQ at this stage of her Reign and her life, to be so utterly disrespected, repeatedly is utter gall. Yet another major reason she is hated so much by so many!

This spotty leopard is def!!

Def Leopard…awesome band and takes me back to hockey games music and after parties. She is def, not physically def,but tone def in an abstract meaning. She doesn’t accept any opinion except her own. Any questions she immediately cries troll, racist, hater, a plethora of descriptors. I still cannot believe all the time twitter was going last night either in Italy or as leaving to go there. Who cares if l or others misread the riddle. I am not embarrassed to acknowledge l misread something! Hey this is for fun, if it angers or irritates someone, perhaps reset this or take a break. In saying that, l work very hard in processing what the options are that a clue may mean and then writing it, in a manner that is as clear and concise as l can do.

“ To boldly go……… “.

To boldly go where no man, since changed to no one , has gone before, from the opening of Star Trek episodes. So madam has boldly gone to Rome sans archficial, and the Africa trip is pending shortly. Wonder why the journalists flight to Capetown has been cancelled?? She sees herself as the worlds answer to anything and l am sure she will display her narcissistic brilliantly while there. Oh this is going to be fun to watch!

As an aside, the HMS PRINCE OF WALES was taken out of drydock in Forsyth, Scotland. Some interiors are still being constructed. This is a massive beast of a sea faring ship. Check it out!

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦

Wow! How do you do this dear PG! You take so little and turn out a masterpiece! So impressive, thank you so much! As always, greatly appreciated! Thank you!😃💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Ask Skippy submission

Sep 20th, 2019

————————

66: sept. 21

💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻THANK YOU MM ANON🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜

MM Anon

skippyv20

MM ANON …The wedding r/deception … the bigger picture …… easy does it! but do it…… weasel words …… not an option …… a collection of miss-fits…… heads or tails?……… home alone 7…… A sensible emptiness …… “don’t forget to wind the clock”……… no public appearances …… a good WHO-done

The wedding r/deception

So, this variety of people gather for big wedding number two in less than five years for the same bride,,different groom. It looked like a political conference with the level of security and who was there. Why did they attend, as far as l know the paper said they weren’t part of the evening prepared, l didn’t see them there in the photos from that evening. They were at the wedding, why? If you’re all close friends why not go to the fun bit and socialize, have a few drinks and a dance. I’ll tell you why BECAUSE THEYRE NOT A COUPLE THATS TOGETHER, it’s a charade. There must have been some reason they went, especially l enjoyed the cheeky photo of Harry where he SOUGHT out the camera and grinned. That told this girl all l need to know. Something was up, and we may never know what the agenda was but something was up!

the bigger picture

When one says look at the bigger picture here, it means take a step back from your situation, look at pros, cons, what you have invested into the issue and make the best decision that way. Here l think it’s literal, look at the whole picture, who was at that we’d and why. I have no answers but l think that’s one option.

I also think this is PH, going to the wedding was one small part of his time with mm, MM ANON is telling us don’t yippity yap about who was wrong or right about them going to the wedding or not. I admit it freely, l completely misread the clue about the wedding. Am l still lived?🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂💜💜💜💜💜 l hope so😊. Seriously now, look at the big picture who set him up, what’s happened since then and so forth. I feel we need to continue to brain storm and put forth opinions here, this is fascinating and sometimes what we have talked about is in the paper the next day and l think wow! So let’s keep our eye on the prize and on the bigger picture!

easy does it! but do it

Slow progress in extraction from this sordid tale. Many many things have changed and been revealed l he is back to being called PH in the media no more DUKE🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂. There is so much negative PR it’s incredible and SS has only made things worse. So easy do it with the extraction but DO IT ! HMTQ and LG have this. The thing l fear presently is that speech she is going to give shortly after landing.

weasel words

Weasel words are words or statements that are intentionally ambiguous or misleading AKA word salad. That’s how she speaks, gobble de gook , just all kind awesome kind, yet kind but also awesomely kind, but kind of awesome, yet kindly kind. You get it, you know it. As l said , my massive fear is that first speech with the domestic murder rate off the charts, she goes in there yammering like that, there is serious damage that she could do. This is no joke, l worry about this. She on the other hand thinks she’s so awesomely kind that her speeches save the world and just her presence there will make things all better especially if she uses a darker bronzer!

not an option

Giving up is not an option. There were years invested into planning this and years have been invested into investigations. This must be allowed to play on as long as it needs to. They cannot afford to not pull out and follow every piece of yarn they unravel, this is too internationally important to just give up now. The general public is angry both at home and the a Commonwealth, its an incredible game being played but we have God , HMTQ and LG and PW and PH on ours! Let’s remember to keep them in prayer 🙏🏻💜🙏🏻.

a collection of miss-fits

Well l could say the stolen name SmartSets was a collection of things that fit a very select few and a bag, that cost more than the clothes that the fit on was terrible. The trousers she woke had a big bit of extra fabric right in the front lower area yikes! I do think, the almost inbred crew that was at that Italian wedding was a bunch of misfits. I am not judging but my reading tells me, her first marriage took place in Venice and was a massive affair, that marriage didn’t last three yearsish. Here we have a massive affair in Rome, l don’t get this flaunting of wealth. I just do not get it. The guest list, why are the Kushners, be it Jared or Josh always at any event? The connections in that guest list that was posted in the paper again reminded me of a genealogical family tree. This all so bizarre. Has she grafted her way into money as well? They keep saying she’s a fashion designer, l keep myself pretty in the know of stuff like that because it interesting to me. Before mm, l had NEVER heard of mn and her stupid white shirt. That’s her big contribution to fashion a white shirt? Okay then…..moving swiftly along…….

heads or tails?

Flip a coin, choose a side, you win or lose the bet.

home alone 7

Home Alone aaaaahhhhh Kevin!!! Love it, the sequels not the same. Is this now, the trio to Italy, the 7th time archficial has left left alone by his ‘parents’. Well yes l sure Nannyficial has things all in hand, in fact maybe they will Nannyficial to take care of Archficial in SA??

A sensible emptiness

Emptiness can mean a human condition is a sense of generalized boredom, social alienation and apathy, which means a

lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern.

Sensible can be a statement or course of action chosen bearing in mind wisdom and prudence, and is likely to be of benefit. It can also be something that is practical and functional rather than decorative. Well we know mm is not the latter definition of sensible. So sensible emptiness, PH has made a life changing, mane lives actually, decision that night at soho, and here we are today. I truly believe this description of sensible emptiness could apply to him, HMTQ, those who live both, their families and all of us who are loyal to the Crown and love our royals. We know justice has to be brought to bare or is it bear, you know what l mean. So these feelings we talk about with our 💜🐼💜 and we share here are normal. We need to pray for justice seekers and truth seekers in all forms, they are doing Gods work.

“don’t forget to wind the clock”

Old clocks need winding to keep them running. To wind somebody up means to get them excited in a good or bad way. I think this means quite literal don’t forget to take care of yourself, PH, sleep, exercise, eat well, check your emotions with those you love, do what you need to do to stay fit (and oh is he fit,😁) so as the clock needs to be wound to function well, these things are essential to him being able to function well.

no public appearances

Amw will stay MIA, this is stupid ridiculous, but the lie has to continue. There has to be a reason and we must pray for PH , HMTQ and LG. Especially PH, he will have to maintain his composure. How they are going to keep this lie going l don’t know but l read they are taking 12 staff, that is NOT counting RPOS!!

a good WHO-done it.

This clue has a double meaning. It can mean a really good storyline in a book or film or tv really, that doesn’t tell us straight away who the criminal is but lays clues to figure it out….kinda like your riddles MM ANON. WHO is the World Health Organization. I don’t know if anybody noted the article l put on my blog last night or read it in the paper/saw or heard it on the news, this is a run on sentence for the ages, my goodness! There has been a spate of relationship homicide in SA, with 30 women being murdered in the last month alone. There has been a dramatic rise in statistics of violence. The WHO commenting means this is a severe issue needing addressing! With great dread do l await madams first speech shortly after they land, where she will speak on the topic of violence against women. This is a very dangerous decision with a lot of potential blowback!

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦

Wow! Amazing….so appreciate this dear PG! Things are getting interesting now! Thank you so much!😃💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

———————

67: Sept. 22

💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻THANK YOU MM ANON🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜

I have had a massive increase in my sciatic pain, that’s been building since flu last week, today was brutal. But better now so l thought l would give the riddle a go. Please continue praying for me, l really am in need of it. Lots of love and gratitude 💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻PG🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜

MM Anon

MM ANON … Azurelee Drive…… “ we are interested” … … between 6 and 10……🎼 California scheming 🎼……((wedding gems…… “ SA ‘just a fuc#@g nuisance”…… “£uck the press, we can do anything I want”…… “ I don’t lie, I embellish”))……” is on our watch list “……… “HEADS ‘ I win”…… a draconian solution … “when The devil drives”. 🎼 “over and over and over again my friend”🎼………(🤫🤫🤭💎💎💎💎👩🏽‍💻👷🏿‍♂️👷🏿‍♂️👷🏿‍♂️👷🏿‍♂️ when in Rome!!!!)

Azurelee Drive

Azure is the bluest of blues it is a gorgeous colour. As l suspected, Azurelee Drive is in Malibu, another clue to reenforce her long term plan is Malibu. Are there any prisons with an ocean view in Malibu? Maybe someone could let me know if there are, l am serious!

“ we are interested”

Again with the first person royal”we”. HMTQ is very interested in what’s going on. I think we are nearing some sort of climax with this trip. I have said this before, l trustmyngut, l have a very strong feeling something is going to happen. Perhaps the reason they flew to the wedding for such a short time, hardly worth it, was for her to use someone else’s computer to engage in a blood diamond deal? Again does she not get she is being monitored? Obviously not!

between 6 and 10

7, 8, 9, are between 6 and 10 literally. But l think this is the amount of time they spent at the wedding. They weren’t part of the party the night before, the next day wedding breakfast or the second night party the night after the wedding. Wow besties eh? Isn’t it awesome to have such great best friends?🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂

🎼 California scheming 🎼

This is a play on the song California dreaming, MM ANON has used this before, so it’s reenforcing for her plan to live there after all this is over. Yes perhaps in a dark cement building! Her plan, get all the $$$$€€€££££££ she can, set up her blog again and divorce rebuilding her life in Malibu was the last place l read was the mansion search. She is scheming her way into the marriage, during the ,arriage, out of the marriage and after the marriage

((wedding gems…… “ SA ‘just a fuc#@g nuisance”…… “£uck the press, we can do anything I want”…… “ I don’t lie, I embellish”))

Gems has an obvious meaning, which is also involved in this riddle.Gems can also be snippets like best song on an album etc. These are the gems of conversration/comments she made the night of the wedding. She really is stupid, has no filter and no judgement whatsoever!

” is on our watch list “

Of course, with the international security issues at , her past involvement with many, many individuals of dubious character during her yachting decades, and the current work LG has been doing l am certain she is on a watch list. Here l assume everyone knows what a watch list is, a person, or persons, group, or items requiring close surveillance, most usually for legal or political reasons.

“HEADS ‘ I win”

We had heads or tails yesterday. HEADS all caps, what’s the meaning? Who has HEADS and is the winner? I found one definition but nothing in all caps, heads a shouted warning that something is falling from above one’s head.

a draconian solution

We had a case, few years ago where l live, they wanted to build a casino in part of a local pub. Our city had a by-law preventing gambling and alcohol on sale in the same establishment. I can still see AND hear the owner when he was interviewed on the news about how Draconian our laws were. The definition of draconian is of laws or their application) excessively harsh and severe. I might add old law not updated. Many many places have old laws in the books that are never used anymore but still would be enforceable because they still exist as binding law. So LG and his team may have found just such a law or set of laws that they believe fit this situation and can be utilized to the benefit of the Crown. Oh please, please pretty please, let this be so!!

“when The devil drives”.

There is a novel by Scottish write Chris Brookmyre, with this same title. A dual plot, one a Shakespearean play being performed outdoors and a sniper kills someone, second plot a terminally ill woman wants to find her missing sister. The first is obvious, we don’t want that but security will be very tight on the tour l am certain. The second plot, are we being told there is a sister that is missing and still being searched out? Or is this nothing to do with the novel and the obvious meaning, once you’re riding with the devil nothing good and only reviled happens. I am inclined to think maybe a bit of both.

🎼 “over and over and over again my friend”🎼

This song has been performed and covered by many. The endless ways one tried to do things to be loved and keep someone happy. This is PH over and over and over,he is publicly acting this out, the loving supportive husband and “anything Meghan wants Meghan gets”. He has done such a great job and this has resulted in him taking lots and lots of media heat!

(🤫🤫🤭💎💎💎💎👩🏽‍💻👷🏿‍♂️👷🏿‍♂️👷🏿‍♂️👷🏿‍♂️ when in Rome!!!!)

Blood diamonds! We have had this in a previous riddle. Shhh, diamond, laptop, four workers with hard hats of colour. Did she order, or pick up her diamonds??. Or sell some??? I suspected from an earlier riddle blood diamonds were on the table for her, here l have confirmation . I am thinking with the use of laptop she communicated the deal and will pick up in Africa. Oh kids, this is getting good. HANDCUFFS CLANG CLANG,

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦

Fantastic PG! Things are heating up it seems! Thank you, we so appreciate all the work you put into this….especially on your days! ThNk you🙏🏻❤️❤️❤️

Ask Skippy submission

12 notes

Sep 22nd, 2019

———————-

68: sept.28

💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻THANK YOU MM ANON🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜

IT IS SOOOOOO GOOD TO BE BACK!!

MM Anon

MM ANON …… a slippery halo… … AFRICANT …… 🎼” you must have been a beautiful …” 🎼……… faux mother… no British archificial …… a crowd of booooos await……” so’ she Hates the bloody Brits”…… PB will destroy her thunder …… “ Malibu-hoo welcome “…… a $6 million drive in …… an uninterested Africa … PR pays for local hysteria … a white black imposter … well paid unimpressed mothers feel used …… “beef it up for Pakistan”

a slippery halo

The Halo Trust, the anti landlmine charity that a Princess Diana was such a part of and still thrives today because of her work . I remember 1997 , the land mine on the news, her walking, seems like yesterday. This is a double entebdré by our dear MM ANON. Harry has been slaughtered by the media for being a spoilt petulant entitled man. The halo or crown of the Prince 🤴 is slippery now in public opinion. LET’S PRAY FOR OUR HARRY🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

AFRICANT

Can or can’t, the version of cannot. Nothing has been good, happy, meaningful about her presence on this holiday, it’s not a royal tour. Just wonder what other stunts she is going to pull, because we are going to get another video of amw with oh happy day in the background music. By the way, is she paying royalty rights for using that music , the performers? Catherine cannot and does not put a foot wrong. This one cannot even put a hair right!

… 🎼” you must have been a beautiful

You must have been a beautiful baby, you must have a beautiful child! Singing as l type, great old song. Drive all the girls wild, l think is one line. He sure is a cutie, that’s for sure!

faux mother

As below, she doesn’t possess an ounce of mothering instinct. She can’t because that takes away from attention on her. This is exactly why amw was not at the play date.

no British archificial

So is he born in SA? Not royal, less than that not even British. Good God this woman is moronically stupid! Makes sense that he was in SA, that’s why the dolls have been in use, Christening photo, photoshopped, first photo that was barred by the palace from being used after June, can’t recall exact date. She picked this child up while in SA so she could throw him up in the air, climb up steps in five inch heels to copy Catherine , show off a real baby, who didn’t respond to her at all except when she dug her hands into him and he involuntarily winced. THIS US MADNESS PEOPLE!! This poor child, now his face is forever plastered. In one photo, l thought l noticed a strong resemblance to papa TM!

a crowd of booooos await

Oh Kuwait, l am rubbing my hands together, wait until the return to the UK! NOW the gloves are off, she will be booed and booed, good luck to her on any engagement or public appearance. Boo boo boo are coming. People are beyond furious in the UK and Commonwealth!

” so’ she Hates the bloody Brits”

This is PP, piping in his comments l oh Sir, l feel so bad for you having this to deal with. HMTQ needs your love and sumore than ever! Steady on Sir, steady on!

PB will destroy her thunder

I am so happy for Princess Beatrice and Edo, their engagement photos both the colour ones that Eugenie took, and the black and white ones, l cannot recall the photographers name just now. I was soooooo happy to see the news and what a payback for her stealing the thunder meaning spoiling someone’s excitement, on Eugenie and Jack’s wedding day by wearing that huge coat to stir attention to possibility of her being pregnant. Who knew how that fauxmegnancy would turn into such a mess. As does everything with her!

“ Malibu-hoo welcome “

Will she be welcomed with hoos or boos in Malibu when she just leaves once she has her nest padded, or so she thinks. I don’t see her living the high life in a mansion. She might check into hotel California but she may never leave. Justice is coming! The IRS will want it share of the 250K as well as all she has purloined. The US , l believe is the only country in the world where no matter where you live you still pay taxes on EVERYTHING!!!

a $6 million drive in

Ha ha, reminds me of summertime, movies st the drive-in, l think the place she will eventually live will be mouth many tens of millions, have the best security and the best staff. It will also require wearing of an orange jumpsuit or its equivalent!!

an uninterested Africa …

As l have written below, NOBODY CARES ABOUT HER, People are struggling to get by. SA has had water problems for years! Droughts, poverty, the sky high murder rate and domestic abuse, she isn’t even in the radar of importance.

PR pays for local hysteria

The ‘crowds’ on the tree stump she stood🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂 the great Plato sharing infinite words of wisdom and insight. The video with DT was privately arranged, paid for. People have been bussed in as paid extras so it appears she has people who adore her. I saw an interview with three regular women walk-in down the street, he asked if they knew of a big event, they looked at each other , nothing. He said royal, then they came out with Harry but not a one of them knew her name. Ooooooo the sting!The burn! I hope she saw that!

a white black imposter

Blackface used to be a thing decades ago, Al Jolson, in the first talking picture/movie made it famous, well it already was actually. White people putting black on their faces and pretending to be black to perform or at parties etc. Here we have the screamer of racist, troll, racist troll, her two twitters that l follow are.CcccRrrrraaaazzzzyyyy. She talks to herself, to Sam, sometimes tweeting from both alternately. She of the racist card, has spent her life identifying as Caucasian, her immense use of bronzer gets worse day by day, except it seems to me on this ‘tour’ her makeup is less, her clothes are dishevelled, she looks a mess. She is trying to pass as black so it’s fits her narrative right Sister?!? Passing, years ago meant someone of colour who appeared Caucasian could appear or pass as being white and avoid the racism. She disgusts me 🐍.

well paid unimpressed mothers feel used

These women who allegedly paid 50K to have a half hour ‘lunch’ with her, made to sit on the floor, which culturally is soooooooo inappropriate given that is done when grieving or in mourning. God please bring the Justice and remove her from this family right into a nice colour of orange, she seems to like jumpers or whatever they are called in the UK, that one piece thing she wore, so orange to match her bronzer which she has amazingly used so much less of, in the photos l have seen.

“beef it up for Pakistan”

To beef something up, is to make it stronger, better more secure. The Cambridges are heading off for a Royal tour, let me say that again, A ROYAL TOUR😁 to Pakistan. Security issues have been in discussions and this trips itinerary will be not be as publicized due to those issues. Now it is sounding like, by this clue, that they have had to increase the already planned security measures. There is always the possibility the risk is too great and things would have to be cancelled. That would be a disaster in relationship building but safety first! Remember Harry is #1 on the Taliban hit list and that risk is by extension a factor.

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦

Fantastic! Thank you PG! You are right on your game! So appreciate this!🙏🏻💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Ask Skippy submission

Sep 28th, 2019

————————-

69: Sept. 28

Is this a new thing MM ANON. Two riddles in one Day?🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂

💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻THANK YOU MM ANON, ITS SO AWESOME TBE BACK DOING THESE🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜

MM Anon

skippyv20

MM ANON …… second son walks alone … bonfires of PR. …… a great rip off … another archificial field trip… a home run …… a lot of backlash back home …… sugar coated photos……… “is it time to go it alone “…… “THE TAPE HAS BEEN SOLD” …… “ for posterity old thing”…… burying it with the rest. ……… 🎼 “ riders on the storm” 🎼

second son walks alone

Our Harry, walks alone, many in the public have been so critical of him, they can’t see the truth or haven’t taken the time to inform themselves. He is our Harry, l don’t care what anyone says, he is a man literally physically fading away, he’s so thin, dishevelled, being with her, l cannot imagine. To me, he deserves a medal for serving to HMTQ ! He has been and will remain in my prayers. Literally speaking he was walking alone in that minefield, or former minefield. What a metaphor for his life eh? 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

bonfires of PR.

I remember being in Scotland 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 for Bonfire 🔥 night as we called it or Guy Fawkes day . Old history about Scottish rebellion and a bomb being placed in parliament etc etc look it up, its interesting. Anyhow it’s still great fun in Scotland 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 every November. So MM ANON is using bonfires to describe the PR , basically it’s all explosive!

a great rip off

The fee she is charging especially that lunch just using people for maximum cash value. I am positive she has other side deals going on. I recall that last riddle l dud days ago with the clue being diamonds, workers in safety coloured vests, men of colour, a woman at a laptop. You remember it, lead me to think she is sourcing blood diamonds for resale. Everything with her is a rip of, all a grift, capsule collection, using people even a baby for her personal gain!

another archificial field trip

Oh as l said in the other riddle, we are going to see another privately filmed, ore arranged appearance of amw, l bet she is being paid for these appearances. I just hope his socks fit this time and may a pair of shoes, a blanket, a toy/stuffier and a bib or rag for drool.

a home run

Baseball, America’s game. Home run, hit the ball out into the stands, run all the bases until the final base which is called home base and you’ve made a home run. But MM ANON you sly lady🤣🤣🤣, you are not talking baseball. She is going to do a runner and head home! Be gone, be gone, go face the IRS🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂🤣

a lot of backlash back home

Oh my oh my, showing him publicly live in the flesh for the first time in SA and not in the U.K. has lit a match under a huge pile of 🧨 dynamite. She is and has been playing with fire. People are FURIOUS and they already hate her! I cannot wait to hear the boos. I think the English politeness is gone, as MM ANON has said in other riddle, she has made her bed or beds🤣🤣🤣, she must lay in it. But the sad thing is she doesn’t give a whit of care or respect for HMTQ, the BRF nor the public of the U.K. or the Commonwealth!

sugar coated photos

Oh the sugars have literal gone crazier seeing archficial , like Pinocchio is now a real boy, not rubber anymore but flesh and blood. No seeing what’s so obvious, no relationship, the child doesn’t know her, climbing those steps in stilettos , holding him, unsafely, then roughly, tossing him in the air, the look of concern on DT daughter she even put her own arms up lest amw get dropped. Oh heavens how tacky were those cookies, sweets with words written on them, banana-gate2.0!

“is it time to go it alone “

Is the her or him going it alone? I doubt at this point, if Harry ended it, there would still be screams of racism. I think she is padding her nest in SA and planning her post-divorce life. Good luck with that project Rachel!

“THE TAPE HAS BEEN SOLD”

The infamous tossed salad tape sold at last. All uppercase. I am certain either the BRF has it, or a good friend of the BRF has secured it for them and they have it!! Who hoo !! Happy day! 😂😂😂😂😂just reminded me of her abuse of that beautiful song Oh Happy Day. I really wish she took those words to heart, the second line is when Jesus washed my sins away. I want no soul condemned but she has to choose.

“ for posterity old thing”

Again our PP, speaking, saving the video and dossier perhaps for posterity. When you save something for posterity, it means you hold onto it, keep it safe because you never know when you might need it!

burying it with the rest.

Wondering did the BRF buy the video, and just keeping that and all the other things in her dossier burying it in the secret files. I highly doubt they will reveal too much species publicly. The marriage will dissolve as a natural course, she can’t adjust etc etc. The BRF and PH. Publicly have done everything and then some to welcome her, they are spotless in this!

🎼 “ riders on the storm” 🎼

The Doors, classic album. He died in Paris and is buried there, it’s a place to visit for many fans.This is a classic song but dark in lyrics. Speaks of home one is born into poor ie dog no bone, don’t want lyric infringement so l adjusted that. Speaks of a killer , a family dying in a car crash. Speaking in the chorus that a woman needs to love and support her man. Put these all together at , pardon the pun, but they are a perfect storm for describing what’s Harrys life has been and is. Lost his mum is a car crash, his wife born into grifting family allegedly. Certainly getting no love and support from her. Today, well yesterday now, but seeing him sitting where she sat, with the now woman who was the girl she comforted, him all alone by the tree, didn’t you just want to take him in your arms and comfort him? Tears now……

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦

Thank you dear PG! I am in awe! You are brilliant! A very rough day for Harry I am sure….🙏🏻💜💜💜

Ask Skippy submission

Sep 28th, 2019

————————

70: Sept. 29

💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻THANK YOU SO MUCH DEAR MM ANON, I KNOW YOUR TISK IN DOING THIS FOR US, TO SEEK THE TRUTH AND GET IT OUT IN THE OORN🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜

Did l ever tell you all, l do the riddles from bottom to top? I don’t know why, l used to look at the Sears catalogue from the back too, l still look at magazines back to front. A fun wacky PG fact!🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂

MM Anon

skippyv20

MM ANON …… Cape Town closure ……bells and whistles farewell … on returning, a tour… an unpopular reluctance …… disinformation …… the fence that won’t mend…… club class flying isolation …… Heathrow paps…… no rest for the wicked …… “Hello Boys”…… “He needs a parade”…… “ not another bloody investigation” …… now D&G not H&M. …… cosmetic records!!!! O,no

… Cape Town closure

They officially closed the Cape atone part of the tour and flew out September 29,2019. I was going to say today but l know this is a worldwide blog so l thought l would put that in there. The itinerary has them leaving from Johannesburg, and returning to London. I am sure most of Cape Town citizens had no idea they were there, if they did, no one cared really.

bells and whistles farewell

This whole entire holiday has been just bizarre, her behaviour, a real live baby, was that baby really a boy or just presented as such. We all know the baby shower was for a girl baby, the BRF/LG so so so clever!!! Turned things around that it was a boy baby, that video of them showing amw to a few selected UK and US/CBS reporters was bizarre, at Windsor Castle. She looked so nervous, and PH said they grow so much in two weeks, the glare she gave him!! You know it, you all saw it! Will there be a whiz bang goodie doo? I think likely, paid, bussed in, waving goodbye. I have visions now of O showing up!

on returning, a tour

Oh my goodness, is SS already planning a return trip, as she has been showered with love and praise by thousands and thousands , the crowds have been massive and amazing , kind, amazingly kind, and kind of amazing! NOT!!! I hope you got my attempt at using her favourite words and l tried her amazing kind of word salad, so kind and amazing of me to be so amazingly kind!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂

an unpopular reluctance

Reluctance means unwillingness or disinclination to do something. She is unwilling in any way shape or form to put celebrity aside and take on her proper duchess role. But this makes sense because there was never supposed to be a wedding let alone a baby. Using the word unpopular putting it mildly.

I do think this may refer to PA and his reluctance or downright refusal to be part of the F.B.I. requests for an interview with him regarding his friendship with JE, GM. and other things like VRG allegations. I do not know how long his refusal can go on.

disinformation

PR PR PR PR constant disinformation. One might use the word lies!! It’s been sickening to see and read in the papers. It has Albee’s thus wth her and it will forever be. Oh l just had to let out a big sigh because it’s so sad, and the baby ring used, disinformation about his age, everything about him is one huge example. There is nothing worse than using a child. Scripture says “Suffer the children to come unto Me, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven “ the exact is

Matthew 19:14 King James Version (KJV)

14 But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven..

the fence that won’t mend…

Mending fences has an obvious meaning, fix a broken fence. However it can be used as a metaphor, fixing a brook relationship for example. I think this is what MM ANON is referring to. Madam, initially when she came on the scene was ‘a breath of fresh air’, marvellously inclusive and welcomed into the U.K. and Commonwealth, and into the ‘family she never had’. Many , including PW had grave concerns. It didn’t take very long for the bloom quickly began to fade. There is ABSOLUTELY NO CHANCE IN A MILLENIA INFINITY! that her relationship with the British public, most members of the BRF, the Commonwealth and many around the world , can ever be mended. It has been irrevocably broken. Complete disregard and blatant disrespect for HMTQ! And a laundry list of grifting, disgusting behaviour, plus her complicated filthy past. No mending of this fence is even wanted, never mind attempted. GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦

club class flying isolation

The return flight, again commercial l am sure, back to London should be interesting. She and her team, will again be prattling on about how successful and awesome the tour is, IF BY THE WAY, she and her smuggled alleged living diamond , amw, if she wants baby in London, or just leave is SA. and carry on with dollies. My sentence structure is horrendous but IF BY THE WAY, l meant IF she can get through customs. Do babies need passports, Royal Allegedly babies? Was he sleeping on arrival and she got archficial through that way. I don’t know how, strict customs are with royalty.

On the flight, Harry will be alone, not involved in anything because it’s all about a madam. I noted today how sloppy he looked catching that flight in t shirt and jeans, wrinkled, he has been wearing those ratty brown suede shoes the entire time. He suited up well though earlier and l an certain when he means the High Commissioner he will hopefully be dressed for it. I keep repeating myself, but his looks and behaviour are SCREAMING FOR HELP, HE HAS COMBAT FATIGUE! I am so worried, he’s wasting away, remember the interview when he was in uniform and something urgent was happening, he took off his mic and ran to see what needed doing? Remebhow fit and muscular he was? Look now, dishevelled clothes, those brown shoes😩, looks like he cannot sleep etc etc etc. I know l keep repeating myself but please LG, l know he is getting help behind the scenes, but our Harry is at such risk now, in his depression, l do worry greatly for him!!🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Heathrow paps

Oh my my my my my!!!! The media and paparazzi will be waiting at Heathrow, if that’s where they land, they might be cheeky and land at Gatwick or elsewhere. The media when they return and subsequently is going to be scathing!!!!! Again read her twitters, petal is in SA talk about the Sussexes non-stop but denies being her, petal calls her baby bubs has done for quite sometime. In SA, big reveal, amw nickname is Bubba ☺️☺️☺️🤣🤣🤣. We are not talking about Einstein here! It would be funny if it weren’t so dangerous!

no rest for the wicked

She had all her private things planned during this holiday. Yet she still manages centre stage by foisting herself via IMessage or Skype l think to be with the classroom where PH was in Malawi. All about CAMFED campaign for female education . She just cannot let him go, except when he could have really needed love and support, in Angola, the mine field, him sitting all alone by the tree named after his mum. Oh self seeking narcissistic behaviour, she lives a Master Class of it.

“Hello Boys”

I can’t remember the name of the film, it might be Hello Boys actually! It’s fantastic Bette Midler at her finest, set further war, WWII, she goes on tour to entertain the troops, she would appear on stage all gussied up looking gorgeous and sing for them, she is amazing. Great film! I wonder MM ANON are you relating madams behaviour to the character in the film?? Going on tour and putting on a show!!! I might be way off but that’s a great film!

“He needs a parade”

Support and love for Harry! Agree wholeheartedly! Yes he made a bad choice of bootycall that was his choice,who of us is without sin and can cast the first stone? This was all pre-planned, they would have kept at it, until it worked. I think he needs medals of the highest order for service to the Crown, HMTQ, his granny. He needs away time, months of privacy, therapy, perhaps medication, he ,Ishtar we’ll be on anti-depressants already! HE NEEDS PRAYER🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻. This is evil at work, it’s a nefarious web planned, he was shared in it.

“ not another bloody investigation”

What now? What’s the next thing? Well PA is in a spot of trouble, putting it mildly. He has hired a new PR guy, Jason Stein, former Amber Rudd’s bulldog, lost his job when she quit recently! The paper says he is a ‘master of the dark arts’! The same was said about SS. What are the ‘dark arts’ these PR people use??? Anyhow, there are more accusers , resulting further Epstein investigations in America. The F.B.I. are more insistent upon an interview. The palace statement and PA years ago when this first came up, were emphatic he had NO sexual contact or interaction with VRG. They are not commenting today, read the article in the Daily Mail, if you’re inclined. They are saying, royalty is not an issue, years ago it was swept away. Since the #metoo movement the world has changed. Many many famous men have been charged, Bill Cosby, many famous American media personalities, actors, Weinstein, . This week l was chuffed to hear Wexner been charged in connection with Epstein! If you don’t know Les Wexner, look him up. He’s an American billionaire, one of his many businesses is Victoria’s Secret! Buy from them, you give money to an alleged sexual predator! I am not recalling just now his other businesses, but very very wealthy men have been and are being brought to justice. PA is in serious trouble. The ,ore he refuses to cooperate and scream he’s royalty, he is dragging out the inevitable. Poor poor HMTQ, l just feel so bad for her!

now D&G not H&M

Baby Archie wore H&M to meet DT, which was subsequently marched and appeared officially on H&M advert and website l think website. Now baby Archie will appear wearing D&G. Dolce and Gabbana highend designer Italian clothes. This woman never fails to put a foot wrong. I don’t know if Archie was wearing it while she carried him to catch the plane to Johannesburg , the photos again captured through a clear glass walled corridor. Did anyone else think the ‘baby’ she was carrying looked a lot smaller than amw who met DT? Or was it just me? I would love a side by side photo. Maybe l am totally off.

cosmetic records!!!! O,no.

I am not sure if these two clues go together but this is how they appeared to moi. Are there records surfacing or in possession of the BRF and LG’s team of investigators that show the extent of work she has had done, especially since coming onto the scene with PH? We know something was up at U.S. Open, she had that invisible medical tape over her nose 👃🏻, yes l purposely use that colour of nose! We all have seen her nose appears to be collapsing, those darn hobbies can show up in real physical manifestations ie wide eyed , dilated pupils, agitation, hyperness, just read the twitters feeds that will show you bizarre behaviour, also noted the times tweets are sent!

As far as O, no…..PH is/ has reportedly been working with an O on mental health programs for a fruit tv channel. I have no idea where things are st with that. Is she going to come back on the scene in Africa. I know she has sponsored a school there, where there had to be some firings of l think the administrator , look it up!! I have visions now of her showing up for a surprise appearance with madam. Oh gracious, make it stop! PLEASE😩😩😩😩😫😖😖😖

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦

Thank you so much dear PG! Seems much coming….Seeing your humour and wonderful personality shining through….is wonderful, you are BACK! Thank God for our Dear PG!🙏🏻💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜. Sept. 29, 2019

[willow-salix]

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Mistakes Novice Writers Make - Day 5 Writing and Prose

Hi guys, and welcome back to our last day of common mistakes that novice writers make. Today we’re gonna talk about general writing mistakes and problems with prose.

The biggest thing that novice writers are guilty of is trying too hard. They might feel like their plain, everyday way of talking and writing isn’t good enough, isn’t clever enough or isn’t literary enough.

And so, they will try to be something they are not. This almost always shows to the reader and makes the writer look like an amateur.

A lack of clear and concise prose will turn off all but the hardiest of readers. Writing styles, much like language evolve over time. The days of big words and flouncy, poetic prose went out with Dickens. And while it’s nice to go back and read them sometimes, they are very much of their time and not to most modern tastes.

That’s not to say there is anything wrong with this style of writing, it has its place and can still be used today if it’s done right, but it’s a skill that takes practice and more practice to get it right. Often if you are writing a book in the style of someone else, you can market it as such and that’s fine, your readers will know exactly what they are buying, but for a modern, contemporary novel, it doesn’t work at all.

Not matching your writing style to the type of book you are writing. For example, if you have a rather old-fashioned style, with very proper sentence construction and a love of bigger words, you might be better suited to a historical novel where it will work better. Older writers who attended school in a different era tend to find this works for them. An historical novel doesn’t have to be set hundreds of years ago, it just has to be a time that is not now. So, if you grew up in the 60’s, were taught in those times and still have those kind of speech patterns to your writing, then maybe think about doing a novel set during that time period, where your langue and style will be able to flow and work to its full potential.

If you have a more modern style, then set your novel in modern times that reflect it. it would really jar with your readers if you used modern langue in a novel set in the 1940’s for example.

On the subject of historicals, let me add in a little warning about another problem that was brought up by another writer is asked about common mistakes. And that is lack of research.

Armature writers often get too caught up in the story and have an overly romanticised view of the time period they are writing about.

I’m a member of a few active writing forums and one observation someone made was how they were having to re-write almost all of their novel because their editor had said they had overly romantic, TV drama style descriptions. And because of this they had now learnt that the streets of 1850’s New Orleans would have been covered in horse shit as well as human waste, people would be pissing on the street without a care in the world, it was filthy, it stank and was not really a nice place to be.

Trying to write a book when all you know about the area or time period has come from Movies or TV shows will scream novice and showcase your lac of effort. Research is your friend.

This doesn’t just mean in the physical descriptions of the area itself, but includes the dialogue they would have used, the accents and slang words they would have used, the legal system of the time, how the country worked, and basically researching all aspects of the book, not just the obvious.

Another prose problem would be making your writing overly complex, again this is related to the type of book that you are writing.

Going into massive details about how a computer works and how they are built is fine if you are writing an article for a computer magazine, but not in a novel or gods forbid, a short story. Readers will have a hard time following it and will likely skip ahead or give up on the story entirely. It’s the same with science or physics, keep things as basic as you can while still giving the information that is needed. Don’t treat your reader like they are stupid and need to be spoon fed the ABC, but also keep the large, complicated scientific explanations in their place such as magazines, academic journals and dissertations.

Choppy prose is another example of amateurish writing. Choppy prose can make your writing feel disjoined, like it lacks flow (because it does) and construction.

While this will work in small does, for an action scene or a scary scene, too much will make it feel like a race, exhausting your reader and making it harder to read.

There are a number of culprits that result in choppy prose, the most common two being fragmented or run on style sentences.

Run on writing is when two or more scene points are joined without proper conjunction- like the use of and, but, or type of words- or without punctuation. It has an almost hurried pace and that isn’t always the pace you are trying to create. For example:

“Mona arrived at the bank only 3 minutes late she ran up the steps she banged on the door screamed at the people still inside she had to get inside to talk to them.”

Fragmented writing seems incomplete, lacking a real purpose, flow or structure. It can make the writer look uneducated, it can read in a really confusing way and give an image you don’t want. For example:

“Mona gave up and stopped. Cried. What would happen now? Ruined. All was ruined. She sat down on the steps. Because her legs gave out. maybe someone would help her? The next bank. Take pity on her.”

That was actually hard for me to write, because it goes against almost everything I know as a writer. But you’d be surprise how often I see it while beta reading, in online stories or in independently published books.

See how badly those examples read? But don’t despair, because both can be fixed with a little practice and work. Separate your run-on sentences with correct clauses, or into sentences of their own, adding more details when needed. Smooth out your fragmented writing with proper punctuation and build them into full sentences.

Here is an example of how to fix some of the structural problems.

“Mona missed the bank by 3 minutes, finding the doors locked. Desperate, she banged on the door, calling to the people inside to let her in. She needed to talk to them, to fix it. they ignored her, deaf to her yells. Giving up she stopped, bursting into tears as the reality of the situation hit home. Ruined, it was all ruined.

Her legs felt wobbly, incapable of holding her up and she sat down heavily on the steps before she fell down. Maybe someone else would help her, maybe another bank would take pity on her? she couldn’t give up now.”

That flows so much better, it explains the situation in brief detail and shows her mood, but also her determination to keep trying.

Check your word choices. Nothing screams amateur more than writing the wrong word or spelling.

Here is a brief example of this, I’ll give you a moment to read it. (show purple picture.)

Using the wrong word choice can make you look uneducated, like you are trying too hard and using words you don’t understand in an effort to look clever. When in fact it has the opposite effect.

If you are using a word that has more than one meaning, check its definition, check the spelling and make sure you are using it in the correct way. For example: bare and bear One, spelt BARE- means that something is naked, not covered, to bare all, or to be bare, something that is basic, the bare essential, without decoration or fancy features. Bear spelt BEAR has more than one meaning, it means a bear as in the animal that lives in the woods and likes to steal picnic baskets, other meanings include not being able to bear something, its unbearable, I cannot bear it. you can also bear something, as in, he was bearing a tray of snacks.

The same goes for any words that you do not use or hear in everyday conversation, check them, because you can quite easily misunderstand the meaning of a word or misspell it to turn it into something it shouldn’t be. If you are wanting to use a word that you have never checked before, check it. A thirty second google could be the difference between looking educated or stupid.

So many people think they know the meaning of a word only to confuse it with another that sounds very similar, for example, Synonym buns, and cinnamon buns. Most definitely not the same thing, and yes, I’ve seen this one on the internet, it’s a real thing.

Another thing to always check is a common saying. By that I mean when someone thinks they know what a common saying is, but they actually misheard it themselves and now just keep saying it wrong. One example I’ve seen of this is someone that wished everyone could just “barry the hatchet” I don’t know who barry is or why he’s a hatchet or what they are trying to do with him.

All of these little slip ups are sure fire ways of making yourself look bad when they turn up in your writing work.

If I read a comment or post by someone that uses the wrong words while trying to look clever, usually when someone is ranting or trying to make an offensive point, I will notice it, I can’t help it. and much as I would love to say that I don’t judge them, lets be real here, I do. I do judge, because I believe in education, and in continuing to educate yourself, to better yourself, for as long as you have left on this planet. By not looking up the correct words, using tools like spell check or even bothering to use the right spelling for a word, well that’s often just laziness in my eyes. Harsh but true. I can’t take someone seriously if they are trying to make a point when they write like that. And if I saw that in a novel, it would likely make me stop reading. If you want to be taken seriously with your writing you have to start taking it seriously yourself, and that means lots of time and effort.

Bad use of punctuation, or the complete lack of it, is also something that many will judge you on. It can also throw off the whole rhythm and flow of your writing. I’m not going to go deep into this as I’m planning to do a video on this subject. But what I will say now as a quick tip is to either read your work out loud or better yet, get a reading app to do it for you if you have trouble with knowing how punctuation works within your work. The difference between a full stop and a comma is huge, but many treat them as the same thing, almost interchangeable, but the misuse of them will change the whole structure of your sentence.

Repetitive words are another thing that novice writers may do. Now I’m not saying that you need to pull a Joey and use a thesaurus for every word you use, but you can mix it up a bit.

If you are describing something and you will need to make a point more than once, try to find a different descriptive word to use. I have a personal rule of never using the same descriptive word twice for the same thing in the same paragraph.

Obviously, there are exceptions to this rule, some things you can’t branch out on without looking like you are trying too hard.

A book is a book, sure technically you could say novel, opus, tome, volume, paper back etc, they all mean the same thing, but it would get pretty ridiculous if you used them all. In this case I would describe the book itself, “A paperback romance sat on the bedside table,” and then just refer to it as the book after that. “She picked up the book, studying the cover,” “she flicked through the book, starting to read at random,” “She threw the book at his head.” That is an example of keeping things simple.

When not to use repetitive words would be when describing something important, like a baby. You could use new-born, the baby, his son, her child, the infant, etc.

Picture the scene, there had just been a traumatic birth and now the baby is safely here and it’s the aftermath or even during the birth itself, just saying the baby all the time would become boring and repetitive.

If something is important it needs to be kept at the forefront of the action and that means that it needs more than one descriptive word.

Another example of this would be action words or ‘doing’ words if you prefer to call them that.

Here’s an example of one descriptive word getting overused and boring. “The crystals were placed in a circle, their pattern very specific, with a candle placed in the centre. Next, she took out a shell and placed that in the west of the circle, then came an incense cone which she placed in the east.”

Placed, placed, placed all the same descriptive word. Other words could and probably should be used to keep the writing feeling fresh.

“The crystals were arranged in a circle, their pattern looking to be very specific, a candle was then placed in the centre (our first and only placed) next she took out a shall, laying it carefully in the west of the circle and an incense cone in the east.”

Different words make the writing more interesting.

Another problem which I will just touch on as I did a bit about this in one of the previous videos and I plan on doing a more in-depth talk on them in the future, is POV, i.e. 1st, 2nd or 3rd person writing. Books are almost always in either 1st or 3rd person POV, 2nd is mostly ignored and unused, personally I hate that point of view.

Most novice writers fall into writing 1st person because they find it easier to relate to the character and to tell the story, but this can come with problems. It can be harder to create a more complex storyline as you are limited as to what information you can give and what you can show to the reader due to how much you character will actually know, see and experience.

You will often end up in the realm of telling instead of showing as a way of explaining, which isn’t that great.

Another problem can be lack of character voice as you might not have had time to develop your authors voice and style, therefore all your characters run the risk of sounding the same.

Lastly your characters can come off as whining, self-centred and a bit dumb as it’s all too easy to fall into the trap of too much information feeding.

As always everything with writing is takes time and practice. Read lots of tips, keep watching videos like this and keep writing.

Upcoming videos include dialogue, exploring the various POV’s in depth, how to edit your work and more talk on romance novels.

Until then, blessed be and happy writing.

[sortingoutayoungcontrarian]

I recently typed the name Christopher Hitchens into the search bar on WordPress and was very disappointed with the top result. This result was an ignorant evaluation of who Christopher was as well an evaluation of his book “god is not Great. The author of this “evaluation” was clearly a fundamental Christian along with those who commented on the post thus far… Obviously, they hated Christopher and did their best to discredit everything about the man. I could not help but be a contrarian. I shall copy and paste the exchange below. I shall update per reply.

Me:

Hmm I wonder if you would find Hitchens’ points valid if they were made by a compilation of ancient misogynistic people who believed that genocide, dispossession of land, slavery, polyamorous incest, virgin-child-sacrifice-scapegoating, and baby genitalia mutilation was acceptable (all of these acts adamantly encouraged even), and then translated by a committee of megalomaniacs lead by a man who boiled his wife in a bathtub… All of whom believed the universe revolved around them in every sense the phrase entails and murdered those who said differently whilst claiming absolute morality. The reason why atheists do not mind that Hitchens may or may not have plagiarized is that they value what is true and don’t care how they get that truth. Christians, however, claim the bible to be the inerrant word of god despite its countless plagiarisms and contradictions.

If you could respond to those points which Hitchens made rather than the one he obviously did not care about (the validity of Jesus), then maybe your thoughts of critique would hold more water, maybe even have an atheist flicker with doubt . To be quiet honest, I have a very hard time believing you actually read any book by Hitchens’, due to the fact that his main focus was not to refute the overall accuracy of the bible but rather reveal the overall hypocrisy. You chose to give a general evaluation of a man by highlighting an argument he argued carelessly because there was no need at all to even argue it. Or maybe you were just scared to touch on the points he made that would open the eyes of any free thinking rational mind to see the lie they have succumbed to.

His response:

Your first paragraph has a large number of mischaracterizations similar to what is typical of Hitchens. You seem to have learned him well. Unfortunately, upon close examination, it is sophistry through and through, nothing but a hollow shell of an argument. In but one point: Flatly, circumcision is not mutilation, and to phrase it like you have is not making an argument, but merely using hollow emotional rhetoric. I gave cold explanation of a point, and you respond with emotionalism. This is typical of modern atheism, which Hitchens exemplifies. It always amazes me that atheists deal so much in emotionalism. Personally I prefer reason and logic.

Concerning what I have stated, I backed my claims. For example, see the first link in the post above. As to the Canaanites, I have responded to that as well.

Also please take note of my comment policy.

Me:

Thank you, I am proud to have learned Hitchens! I simply could not do nothing about such an inaccurate “evaluation” of a great man. As to baby genitalia mutilation, I was not making an argument but stating the fact of the matter, a beautiful baby is born and on the eighth day take a blade to its genitalia. There is nothing fallacious about that claim. If it is a semantical issue, the greek translation for “mutilate” is from a compound of kata and temno (to cut); a cutting down (off), i.e. Mutilation (ironically) — concision. The greek word used in the bible for mutilation is “katatomé” which translates– to cut. While circumcision is “peritomē” which translates — to cut around. Look for yourself, please. Studying in-depth interlinear commentaries in greek after graduating seminary school is what drove me away from the hypocrisy that is the church. I am not an atheist, as you assumed in your lazily mistaken attempt of ad hominem, but I merely saw the bible for what it was; a perfect business plan to enslave the people in a time where theocracy reigned. What sane person would not respond with emotionalism over this? If you apply James 2:24 to the role christianity has played throughout the narrative of history you will never again be amazed by the emotionalism that apparently surprises you in atheists however. It causes good people to do bad things, when one takes the focus off themselves and the box they locked themselves in due to fear of losing after-life insurance the bigger picture reveals itself. It is a lame excuse for wars birthed from an ancient inherited trait of tribalism.

You back your claims with a text you cannot prove. As to the Canaanites, I am always amazed by how christians separate real-life and their pretend world of faith as if in admittance to it not being real; Freudian slip esque. Like a child does when playing cops and robbers and their mom calls them inside for dinner and they have to break character in order to reply, “coming mom”. For example, I was stepping outside the realm of the bible and into empirical accounts in history books. who said I was talking about genocide mentioned in the bible only? I never brought up the Canaanites, you were mistakenly assuming (again) atop your omniscience tower. I was referring to, as Hitchens was, the rules for dispossession of land and the slavery of the previous land owners outlined in Leviticus 25, specifically verses 44-46. A lame excuse for justifying lust of what their neighbor has. Leviticus is the same book that outlines the pagan tradition of sacrificing life, (e)scapegoating responsibility. Chapter 25 in Leviticus was most cited chapter in the bible within memoirs of protestants during the establishing of the USA… and people wonder why black lives matter is heading a postmodernist movement.

You still avoided addressing the topic of (1) incest, (2) misogyny (which, unfortunately for all the women of the bible, in this context implies polygamy allowed for the man alone), and (3) The irrevocable evil, with a recorded historical background that goes back thousands of years before the bible linked to ancient savage polytheistic religions : scapegoating responsibility of sins through child sacrifice.

These were the main points of Hitchens, yes? I don’t think one could give a fair “General Evaluation of Christopher Hitchens” without addressing his main points. It seems as if you are trying to hide the reader from the points made by a man who had won countless debates with the leading apologists of all the major religions. A man who is now dead and unable to defend himself… If you could respond to those claims rather than attempting to define who I am or what I believe in then your critiques would be much more (logically/reasonably) respectable. I do apologize if I crossed a line defined in your comment policy. If you would prefer to reply privately I would still appreciate hearing your defense. Whether your audience hears you out or not is not upon my conscious. I would hope they follow you in order to hear the truth rather than feed confirmation bias. I have many issues with your past posts as well that I could refute using the bible, if you are interested. I am honestly just curious and value discussions from those that have come to opposing conclusion.

His Response:

As my comment policy states, this is not a discussion board and we do no go down endless rabbit trails here. Humoring you briefly is all I will do.

–You pointed out correctly that the Greek terms for cut around and cut off are two distinct terms. In no sense is circumcision mutilation. You agree the claim is incorrect. –As for horrible things like incest, the Bible accurately portrays history but does not condone these practices. It forbids incest and shows the folly of marrying many wives, for all who do so are shown to inherit the problems these practices create. –As to the Bible’s treatment of women, any claim that the Bible has a low view of women is completely false. –Child sacrifice was practiced by the Canaanites, which is one reason God commanded they be wiped out. Israel did what you and Hitchens seem to want them to do, which is not actually kill all the Canaanites. As I explained, this resulted in Israel starting these practices, which God stopped by sending Babylon to take Israel into captivity. Please portray the whole account or stop criticizing.

I did indeed deal with Hitchens in a fair manner. All signs point to Hitchens copying from earlier atheist writings, then not even doing the research to check out whether the claims were true. He spent the rest of his life traveling around repeating these claims with bluster, yet they are completely, entirely, totally untrue. His claims about virgin birth myths are completely false. Hitchens did not even do a magazine grade level of research on these items, yet repeated them for years.

The claims in this post stand.

Per my comment policy, we will stop here.

... And then he disabled the comments...

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[sxmhlaiocht]

Why I love the Lord of the Rings (Part 1 - Books)

Anyone who knows me knows that I'm obsessed with the Lord of the Rings ('Obsessed' is probably putting it mildly - I'd drop everything to live the life of a hobbit), however I don't think I've ever properly gone into detail about why I love it.

I'll get the obvious bits out of the way first:

Elves are super cool.

Nazgûl are super terrifying and cool.

Second breakfast.  

Elvish is mega cool.

Legolas.

Gandalf is an other-wordly sort of cool.

This may consist of 2 blog posts, one for the books and one for the movies - Cause I've an awful lot to say about both of them and it'd be really long if I tried to contain all my feelings to one blog post. So I'll start with the books.

I read the Lord of the Rings when I was about 7/8 - My dad gave it to me as a challenge to read. Possibly the worst decision he ever made because it took me about a year and I spent most of that time asking him what different words meant. It's an extremely wordy book. Tolkien's style of writing is phenomenally indepth and a good portion of the book is dedicated towards world-building. So, whilst I read it and enjoyed the parts of it that I understood it wasn't until I went back later on in life and re-read it that I really came to love Middle-Earth.

I cannot praise Tolkien enough for the dedication and sheer craft that went into the writing of that book and the writing of all the books surrounding it. He didn't just write a fantasy novel, he built a whole world consisting of different languages, races, and histories. Tolkien called it 'secondary creation' or 'sub creation'. It's this idea that the writer is creating a world that has its own internal consistency and a complete life of its own. He believed that the tales should have several dimensions: geography, characters, languages, timeline, and that they all should be interdependent. The scenery set should be capable of sustaining the events/characters that interact with it and thus, as a result, it adds an element of realism to the story that draws the reader in and has them invested whole-heartedly in Middle-Earth.

The Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the lore. One thing I love is that he spent his whole life building this universe - He didn't go off and decide to develop a new one and write a whole different story. He was constantly building on to what he'd already written and developing the world all by himself, filling books with lore and history (The Silmarillion, Unfinished Tales, Beren and Luthien - To name a few). He created languages, he wrote songs and poems specific to different races, he developed histories for all the races - The amount of dedication to the world is incredible and it's probably one of the main reasons I love LOTR so much. You can see the imagination and work that went into it and you're never lost for something to read because he wrote so much.

Another thing I love is the language. Tolkien knew the impact that language can have and he used it to his advantage. He was an expert in the history of English and the language of the Rohirrim (Rohirric) is based on old English. He created two separate but related Elvish languages and gave them a history. Fred Hoyt is a linguistics researcher who teaches Elvish (What a hero) and he said that "They are invented languages but they are completely logical and they're linguistically sound," which I think is a great way to put it. These languages are made up but when you hear/read them they seem completely real. They make sense.

I'm starting to lose the run of myself so I'm gonna try be more concise and finish this up. There's so much I could praise such as the characters, the development of the story, the symbolism, the myths - But I won't. I'm trying to just pinpoint the biggest reasons that I get so emotional about a book.

I love stories with an underdog in it. I love stories that don't hold faith in the little guy (Shoutout to my main man Steve Rogers) which then get turned on their head and are proved completely wrong.

Hobbits <3

“And here he was, a little halfling from the Shire, a simple hobbit of the quiet countryside, expected to find a way where the great ones could not go, or dared not go. It was an evil fate.”

Frodo and Sam manage to trek their way across Middle-Earth, without help for the majority of it, and pull off something that no-one really thought they'd manage. Even Gandalf, their biggest fan, was a bit shocked when he realised they were still alive. I just love it. I love that it was the unassuming hobbits that saved Middle-Earth and all they wanted to do after that was go home to live out their days in peace. They didn't want glory, they didn't want fame, they just wanted to help. I feel like Samwise Gamgee needs the biggest shoutout here though because if it was me I probably would've left Frodo somewhere around Weathertop.

[workingontruth]

Pardon the Interruption

I’m going through Timothy Keller’s incredible book, King’s Cross, ...again. Some feel as though …

…okay, gotta stop here. And this is yet another illustration that this blog is utterly unprofessional and seemingly haphazard, random, unfocused – call it what you may.

Feel…I just did it. I used the word FEEL where it doesn’t belong. I know it’s a current and surely temporary replacement for the word “think” …or “believe.” Still, it’s tough on me. In a time when what we “feel” drives us as a culture…it’s tough to accept how we use it as replacement for “think.” It’s nearly as frequently misused as the word “like” …completely out of context itself–not intended to mean “similar to” or “am fond of” at all, but merely as a filler–an extracurricular word purposed to make sure there are no pauses in our stories and verbal exchanges...it merely buys time in our speech while our wondering mind thinks - because pauses or momentary silence is deadly, lest the listener begin speaking and interrupt. By the way, do runon sentences bother you? If so, I’ll apologize now ... this is a “processing” blog, and one not concerned with literary style or grammatical sterility. ;) 

Our culture is a nervous wreck, and the way we speak is an indicator of this reality. And, worse yet, even as I rebel against such indicators of our wrongheaded culture, I just began this entry using it as replacement for the more intended word “think.” Oh…sigh. 

Which leads me to accept the fact that much of my writing isn’t good – in other words, I would never write as I do today as I used to write for academic papers or for a writing or literature project at the university. I use way to much creative license now in my writing. It’s awful from an academic perspective. But I no longer care. I don’t write for grades. I’m 53 years old. I just write what I’m thinking…what’s on my heart. And it’s why I’ll, doubtless, frustrate everyone reading these entries – if anyone does. But it’s okay. I’ll just keep lamenting what I lament and breaking the rules I choose to break because I’m comfortable in doing so. But my opinions…well, they’re just that – my opinions. So is it really wrong that we use the word “feel” instead of “think?” Not really. I just see it as another way the enemy of our soul invites us to walk by emotion and not truth.

Okay now that I’ve addressed this, I can move on. I’m ill. But at least I know it.

Keller’s book…working through it again. As I listened (this is how I primarily get through my books – thanks Audible) …some think if you merely listen to a book’s audio version, you’re cheating (I may as well get this off my chest as well). They believe it doesn’t even qualify as having read the book. I plainly disagree. As my youngest son, Isaac, knows, reading can be a slow, drudgerous (I know that’s not a word – just made it up…chill) chore for some of us. Perhaps I should still be on Ritalin as I was for a short time as a kid. Perhaps I just have a slow brain and cannot clinically process efficiently enough while reading. Perhaps the way I read out loud to myself in my brain is such a liability that reading takes too much effort and is more trouble than it’s worth most of the time. Whatever the reason(s), more of me is engaged when I initially listen to a book. Then, when something I hear is especially thought-provoking or emotionally/spiritually (I don’t know which) impacting, I buy the hard copy of the book. It’s just what I do – how I best learn, listen, …hear, actually.

So…as I listened again to King’s Cross while enroute to Springfield, MO with my University of Indianapolis men’s & women’s basketball teams, … see, this is precisely why I cannot let myself write like this–except for this one entry where, for whatever reason, I’m giving myself utter permission. Not only is it the needless detail that continually comes to mind, but challenging also is my need to revisit the emotional and experiential genesis of the thoughts about which I’m writing/trying to communicate–without which I cannot put onto the page anything that has a chance to make people think, …ponder. And surely, giving myself this permission to write the way I think is going to mean the importance of the thoughts for this entry (which I’m sensing are SUPER important), are going to be lost.

So…as I again listened to Keller’s book (which is as good are reading, mind you), somewhere in the midst of the pages between chapters 5 and 7, something of a “Complete Gospel” came to mind which outlines how we really become and then should live anew in Christ.

For years, I would have said the intention of the Gospel is to bring us into a restored and right relationship with God–to save us from sin’s ultimate consequence, and enable us to gain heaven as his adopted children.

All true.

…okay, because of the importance of what I’m sensing I’m about to write, I have to do it. I have to end this entry–though preserve it for reasons in which maybe only I may rest. And who cares anyway–likely very few will ever read this blog. So, Lord, because this whole exercise may be for you and me alone, I’m going to end, yet preserve, this entry. And we’ll pick this up again in such a way that I’ll do my normal and continual editing so as to really try to make what I’m thinking discernable.

And that’s another thing …words …words are so important. There are right words and there are sufficient words. I don’t like sufficient words. That’s laziness. If one is trying to communicate something, it’s important to use right words–or at least to struggle to use right words. The easier word to use at the end of the last paragraph would’ve been understandable. But, to me, understandable is more a surface word of apprehension. It’s more of a “cerebral only” word. Well…actually, not entirely true...because to understand something is to really grasp its intent–to an experiential level. One can hear something or read something and accept it. But to embrace it’s message, there must be a personal apprehension of its message. It’s like the difference between hearing and listening. Are you with me? Hearing is merely a surface deep “taking in.” But when one is truly listening, empathy and relatability comes onto the scene. If you understand something, it has already become, to some degree, something apprehended with more than the sense of a mental acquisition. So, understandable wouldn’t have actually been a bad word to use. But because today we don’t really know the English language very well, and we throw words around like week-old leftovers, I find myself compelled to use words that make us slow down and think. That’s my hope anyway–if it were possible.

So, this is why I paused above and then used the more penetrating word, discernable. When you discern something, it has entered into your own experience. If you have discerned something, it has made its way into your active processor. It’s what happens when you are reckoning upon something – pondering it thoughtfully–for the Christian, prayerfully.

Furthermore, the challenge is that many have told me I’m too verbose. Not only too verbose, but also too old-English. I use words that may cause people to have to slow down when they read. And that if I want to communicate today, I have to be simple, short, …enabling the reader to easily (carelessly in my mind) slip from sentence to sentence, paragraph to paragraph, and chapter to chapter without struggling to ask, “What is he trying to say here?” I guess if that were the case, and that it’s the only way to communicate today, I’d say, “What’s the point?” If the reader doesn’t take the time to pause, ponder, think about what the writing is really trying to communicate that might more deeply cause consideration before God, then I don’t care to write–it’s just a huge waste of time. So, while I do try to edit down my thoughts and keep them relatively concise (you have no idea), I have no interest in touching ten thousand people with nothing. I’d rather touch deeply, ten people…or maybe 12. 😉 The Holy Spirit will take what is written and use it as He purposes – but we must be loyal to his call for our ponderances…not distracted by the world’s valuation of things.

All that said, and I could go on for some time longer but will refrain, this entry has met its goal, I suppose. What comes next is much too important to belittle with this entry’s silliness. I’m really interested in sorting out the following, which came to me while traveling westward down I-44 toward Springfield, MO a few days ago…

This outline represents the full Gospel:

Surrender me. Fill me. Command me. Fuel me.

Sadly, I believe, many of us see the Gospel as a half dose of the second, two-word phrase. We’re anxious for the Lord Jesus to forgive us (only one part of “fill me”), but we don’t get most of the Gospel. And I’m anxious to get into it.

[cassie1604]

Dreena Collins

For the first Author Interview of 2020, it gives me great pleasure to introduce you to one of my fellow Jersey Writers Social Group members. Her writing a CV is an impressive one, and since 2016, her name has appeared on Long and Shortlists for an eye-watering list of competitions. Flash 500, Reflex, Retreat West, Eyelands, Fish Publications, Wells Festival of Literature, Mslexia Annual Short Story Competition and The Bridport Prize. The creme de la creme of writing competitions, who have recognised the writing talent of Dreena Collins.

Dreena Collins captivating her audience at the 2019 Jersey Festival of Words with her engaging wit and passion for creative writing.

In September last year, Dreena entertained a packed Maria Richie Room at the Jersey Arts Centre, during the 2019 Jersey Festival of Words captivating us all with her engaging wit, and her passion for creative writing.

During 2019, Dreena self-published three volumes of her excellent short stories and flash fiction, The Blue Hour, The Day I Nearly Drowned and, most recently Bird Wing. The Amazon reviews alone are glowing.

Tessa:  I can imagine you being an avid reader as a child.  What children’s books hooked you in and have stuck in your mind over the years?

Dreena:  From quite a young age, I was captivated by novels. I remember reading Ballet Shoes (Noel Streatfeild), and marvelling at how hefty the book was, thinking I couldn’t possibly ever finish it! Within a few years, I had also read and fallen in love with The Secret Garden and The Hobbit. There was a lot of escapism in my reading, and I romanticised the locations, picturing myself in archaic or fantastical clothing, in unusual settings.

In secondary school, I moved on to Steinbeck (via Judy Blume, naturally!) and eventually in my later teenage years, I loved the classics, especially Jane Austen. So, all in all, quite a diverse mix, really!

I work in education, and at heart, I’m an English teacher. I firmly believe in the power of reading to change people’s lives and provide them with opportunities. Being able to read gives you access to learning, but also to a whole world of pleasure and imagination, so I am a great advocate for adults reading to children and for encouraging people to find something that appeals to them. I’m sure there’s a book out there for everyone.

Tessa: My first literary success was winning a Blue Peter Badge for writing poetry, aged seven, but my passion for writing took a serious hold when I was about eleven. At what age did you decide you wanted to write?

Dreena: I’ve always loved writing. At the age of five, I wrote a short rhyme for the school’s Harvest Festival (which I could still recite, but I’m too embarrassed to share here!).

At primary school, I also wrote some tediously long ‘short’ stories. At that time, it was most definitely quantity over quality. That urge to write stayed with me during secondary school, and for GCSE English, we were given coursework options that were often either empathetic writing or analysis. I chose empathetic every time, writing from a character’s point of view, and in the end, I had to produce an additional piece as I wasn’t allowed to submit anything but creative work.

I also studied creative writing as an optional module at University, taught by Patricia Duncker, who went on, herself to win McKitterick Prize and the Dillions First Fiction Award for her novels.  I admit my writing was patchy and sporadic in the period between University and 2018. It’s only in the last two years that I have settled into it in a structured and disciplined way.

Tessa: I am someone who finds writing a flash fiction a challenge.  I believe you have mastered the art; as your self-published collections of short stories are a testament to. I believe that having the ability to write flash fiction helps a writer get to the heart of what they want to say. What first drew you into writing flash fiction?

Dreena: It actually started when I realised that my stories were often on the long side. I produced several stories and started looking to enter them in competitions or as submissions, and often they were over the specified word count. This gave me pause to reflect on whether my stories could be ‘tighter’, and I started to deliberately challenge myself to edit ruthlessly, and to be as concise as possible. Now I enjoy the challenge and have found that it makes me not only more precise in my writing, but actually more experimental.

Flash Fiction lends itself to breaking the rules, playing with form, tone and structure as its akin to poetry in some ways. Plus, you can’t be too formal or stick to the rules when you are slashing words here and there.

Tessa: Many of the stories that appear in your books have been both short and long-listed in competitions. How long did it take you to compile each collection of short stories?

Dreena: I don’t write every single day, though most days I do, and either way I do something towards my writing on a daily basis – planning, sorting out my files, editing, or social media updates. I do often write though, several times a week, and I can produce a short story every week to ten days, or one, two or even three flash fictions in a week. Not every piece is usable, of course.

For my first collection, The Blue Hour, it took me around eight months to have enough usable work, but by the time it was launched, I already had several stories for book two, as I had carried on writing during the whole (mind-boggling!) publication process. I was ready for book two after around four months but decided to wait. I have published around six months apart in each case.

Tessa:  I am thinking about self-publishing my first novel, and was wondering what, as a self-published author, you believe is the best way to market your books?

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Dreena: I am an absolute convert for social media. Before my writing journey, I had a Facebook profile that I used to keep in touch with friends and a defunct Twitter account I had never used. Now I am active on Twitter, have a Facebook Author Page and an Instagram account. I have found enormous support in the writing communities on Instagram and Twitter, and have had fabulous feedback and encouragement from many other ‘indie’ writers around the world that I have never met. Something I would have been cynical and suspicious of in the past, and you do have to be careful, but these days I try to share the support, and encourage others, too.  Conversely, face to face is impactful as well: I’ve had a book launch event, a book signing and given a talk and these have all led to contacts and sales.

I have also found that, in the main, people are inordinately supportive and helpful. I have reached out to people I have only interacted with online, or to long-lost friends, and they have all said yes when I have asked them to help as beta readers, or to write reviews, etc. I would say, use any contacts you have – however tenuous and don’t be too shy. Most people are nice and will help.

Tessa: I understand you are currently writing your first novel. As your writing has been described by an Amazon reviewer as ‘all human behaviour is here‘, I cannot wait to get to know your characters. Can you give us a flavour of what your book will be about?

Dreena: My novel is a mystery, bordering on a psychological thriller, from the point of view of a middle-aged woman, trying to unpick the circumstances of her grown daughter’s death, abroad. I feel there’s a lack of literature with female protagonists in their late forties, fifties, early sixties. We have seen lots of stories from the point of view of young women, and more recently, several elderly protagonists. It seems bizarre not to have more in between, given women of this age are often avid readers.  I’m also planning to build on my experience of writing flash by incorporating a series of short flashbacks, dotted throughout the book, from the point of view of the daughter, giving the reader glimpses of what (may have) happened.

Tessa: As we all appreciate, fitting in your writing around work and family is not always easy.  How many writing hours do you manage to squeeze into your week?

Dreena: It varies greatly depending on my schedule. On average, across the week, I probably write for about ten hours in total, but that excludes all the things I do outside of the formal process of writing up. It’s surprising how much admin there is to do and how much prep for social media. Social media, making images/ quotes using apps, posters, emailing people, researching competitions etc. is all very time consuming but, bizarrely, I enjoy all of that, too.

I plan a lot in my head before I put pen to paper – I plot ideas in the shower or the car, while making dinner etc. – and I will have a list of words or phrases on my phone that I can draw on once I start, as I am constantly noting down things I hear, or think of. I am not a detailed plotter in the strictest sense, as I don’t produce lots of mind maps and character sketches, but I generally know what I am going to say before I begin writing. That means I can get a piece done in a few hours, without much need for revision afterwards. I am unusual in that I edit as I go, and only really need one quick revision for line edits and typos the next day.

Sometimes I have those rare, precious moments were a flash fiction comes to me almost whole, and I will write it up on my phone in bed or during a break, and it will pour out of me and need very little editing. I am completely immersed then, and can’t type fast enough. Those moments are truly magical.

Keep up to date with Dreena’s writing via her Social Media platforms

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

AUTHOR INTERVIEW: Dreena Collins – Stories for the Modern World For the first Author Interview of 2020, it gives me great pleasure to introduce you to one of my fellow Jersey Writers Social Group members.

[lonbergwrites]

Reader, Come Home - a review

I recently took to Goodreads with something of a rant about a book I just finished called - Reader, Come Home - by Maryanne Wolf.

I do not recommend this book.

I actually disliked it so much in fact – thought it was so biased and self-righteously written – that I was driven to create a special “not-recommended” tab for my bookshelf on Goodreads.

I try to give authors a lot of room. I am trying to write myself - as you knowing coming to this website - and I know how difficult and personal it is. But this book is something else. Something that deserves to not be read. Something that deserves to go away. As of today, I’ve read 90 book so far in 2019. There are 216 total books on my Goodreads profile listed as read or currently reading. Of all of these books, I’ve only deemed 6 to be “not-recommended.” That means that after going over all the books I’ve read since 2014 when I started keeping track, I could only come up with six that really had no redeeming value. Let me put this into more perspective: I didn’t even include Left Behind on this list. That is a truly terrible book – it is terribly written, has terrible plotting and characterization, and utilizes and promotes terrible theology. It is the book I use to make fun of bad books. In fact, I think a lot of it is bad for a person to read because of both the dread and the self-righteousness it inspires in its target market, the “true believers” of the Evangelical far right.

All of that said, that book did give me an insight into a former friend I grew up with, and without it, I would have far less empathy (and actual sympathy) for people of this persuasion. So even Left Behind has its merits in the right context, and isn’t on this list. That’s saying something. I dislike Reader, Come Home that much.

I’m going to start my actual review with “letter four” (her book is divided up into eight ‘letters’ she is writing to ‘dear reader’) from the middle of this book. Letter four is truly, deeply bad. This author’s elitism cannot be excused. It all started earlier as she constantly addresses the reader with “we, the expert readers” know/believe/trust/expect/etc. I understand ingratiating yourself with your audience, but this author’s judgmental tone was a lot to take, especially when it came over and over again in quick progression. She presents the fact that people – on average – now read about 100k words a day. Let that sink in. That’s a good-sized novel a day! That number is way up, she says, and is in fact more than people have ever read before. But she also argues that it is a bad thing because all of that readings doesn’t come in huge, dense passages that you have to spend hours decoding. She doesn’t concede the fact that your average person has never read that way from today through time in memoriam. The very fact that people are reading that much means that people are more literate than ever, even if it isn’t deep reading. There are stats out there today that say that the average person consumes more information on a single day than an educated person from the middle ages consumed in a year. It is such a culturally biased idea to think that the average person, who is indeed reading more than at any time in history, is going to be worse because the top 1% of readers might be reading somewhat less complicated materials. She has no idea what an average reader is, clearly, as she panders to her “expert readers.” She does (what she herself calls) an unscientific study of three best-selling novels from today, and three from a century ago – all of which are on her bookshelf at home. She says she doesn’t know about how to evaluate them, and shouldn’t draw conclusions, and then after skimming them draws the conclusion that new novels have shorter sentences and less hard-to-understand thoughts and phrases, and that is bad. She also neglects to say anything about what “best seller” constitutes sales- and readership-wise, and who could read/afford books in those disparate time periods. Once again, she is only considering the very most literate of people from 100 years ago, and comparing them to your average reader today. Here is a passage from the book that she believes exemplifies good writing: “Italo Calvino wrote about this a single, unalterable sentence: ‘For the prose writer, success consists in felicity of verbal expression, which every so often may result from a quick flash of inspiration, but as a rule involves a patient search for the mos juste for the sentence in which every word is unalterable, the most effective marriage of sound and concepts, concise, concentrated, and memorable.’” Let’s be clear on something here: this sentence isn’t concise. It isn’t concentrated. It isn’t memorable. It is written in such a way as to be dense for denseness’s sake. It actually disproves her point about “good” writing and in fact exemplifies some of the problems with older writing in the minds of the modern reader: it is dry, boring, and purposefully confusing. She has a long passage where she talks about her (former) favorite novel – a dry, byzantine Pulitzer prize winner from decades ago, where long passages are nothing more than meditations of monks as they continually ascend and descend stairs. She chastises herself for not liking it – not being able to read it in fact – in a (once again unscientific and yet conclusion-rich) study of her own making decades after she read it for the first time. She said she didn’t have the patience for it because of all the screen reading she does. Well, maybe. But maybe it was also a favorite book because of the prestige it held at the time for a student trying to get a terminal degree and justify her reading to herself. Also: reading tastes change with the times and some things don’t age well. But it was her fault for no longer having the patience… to me, this whole pursuit seemed distasteful as well as elitist. She seems to be trying to grapple with her own elitism in the following passage: ‘Some of you, no doubt, will think that I protest too much, and that only the elite parts of any population will miss the shelves of older books and poems that pass out of favor with clockwork regularity age after age, generation after generation. But it the very opposite of elitism that propels my worries. I write this book and conduct my research today only because of the dedication of my parents and of a few deeply committed teachers from The School Sisters of Notre Dame in a two room eight grade school house gave me a reason as a child to read the great literature of the past. Only those books prepared me not to leave the coal miners and farmers in my tiny Midwestern town, but to understand each of those still dear people, and the world outside of El Dorado, Illinois in whole new ways.’ First off, you were right, only the elite parts of society will care. Full stop. Second, if you have to point out you are not elitist and do so by saying you’re the very opposite, I would suggest you go back and really think about your motives, because more often than not, the lady *doth* protest too much. You cite your non-elitism by talking about a small school presumably with a low teacher to student ratio, dedicated teachers, literate parents (who were professionals), and the expectation of leaving everything behind for a better life in a better place. You say that only by reading were you able to understand the “still dear people” (who couldn’t possibly understand their town without reading Ulysses) you so smarmily smirk at in the rearview mirror. Gross. She says that kids these days are lacking a knowledge base. *Her* references are not being internalized anymore, and that makes her worry about her kids (who can code, but don’t know the literary references she expects in order to be considered educated by herself and the people who educated her). She says that “teachers” [citation needed] are mad because students don’t want to learn old books anymore (as if most students ever did). “Professors” are mad that their old popular classes can’t be taught anymore for lack of demand (boo-hoo, they have to work more and create a vital education experience for which they are being paid). My take on all of this is that in today’s world kids speak up and want interesting things to learn and aren’t automatons like the author’s generation was often expected to be. But probably the most ridiculous part of this letter is when she castigates herself for not writing perfectly in every office communication and every personal letter she writes. She castigates herself for not reading all the things like the New Yorker (which ‘actually matter’ in her own words) and instead reading journals and summations and noting things that she should probably read more thoroughly later, but probably won’t. She castigates herself for reading more now to be informed than immersed. Because unless it is hard to understand you can gain no value from it, I guess. I feel like this letter is just a letter in self-hate that she’s stapled onto the backs on those less-educated than she. OK Boomer. Letter Seven I find especially dubious as she cites a disproven study saying that children of poor or minority backgrounds hear far fewer words growing up. In fact it has been shown that this study is biased. Poor and minority parents keep quiet with a researcher sitting in their living room because they are afraid of being judged and having the researcher report something to CPS. Rich and white parents speak more verbosely in order to show off and prove themselves to the academics. If you take the researcher out of the home and install cameras/microphones, all of these differences disappear. This is institutional racism showing up in the original study. She is furthering institutional racism by citing this study. This is a recent book, and with this author using a biased and disproven study in her work makes me question anything else she has to say on the matter. Letter Eight is all politics and opinion. She talks about how (deep) reading is necessary to be a good citizen. She states, ‘We conflate information with knowledge, knowledge with wisdom with resulting diminution of all three.’ Good line. And I don’t disagree. She also says that we need to reeducate all citizens to process information vigorously across all media. Here in lies another thing that I don’t think she understands about herself, her motivations, and her writing. This obviously Boomer author (who in letter six was condemning a “Millennial mother” for being worried about reading to her kid, and not instinctively knowing what to do, but coming to her for help – I guess shame on you?) doesn’t realize that it isn’t the child’s fault that democracy is crumbling and people don’t have attention spans anymore. Boomers don’t seem able to handle TV (Fox News), let alone the internet (Breitbart). They were the ones always complaining about how those mediums would rot your brain, and now they are the ones who are destroying democracy and believing every conspiracy theory. I truly believe it takes a generation or two to understand what to do with new technology – and teach the kids a generation or two later – in order to deal with “new” technology. She is so hopped up on this because she and her generation are often unable to make the jump successfully. And like any Boomer, she says that, ‘this is our generation’s hinge moment.’ Whose, now? Who is this book meant for? It is meant for the (I’d argue) overly-educated, self-righteous, non-reflective, panicking, ageing generation of people on the out, who do not understand the world anymore and are terrified and yet still narcissistically myopic. And believe that everything they’ve done and experienced is the only possible way to live life. And they damn will enforce it exactly like that on every generation to come. Ever. Her pièce de résistance in bad thinking is her final thoughts on how to fix democracy. She says that we need to ‘recognize and acknowledge the capacity for reflective reasoning in those that disagree with us.’ This may sound great to her Boomer ears, but the problem with the opposition is some people are being purposefully ignorant and rely on the a priori rational of hard core right wing religion. It is counter to being a deep reader to argue that “everybody has a point that is valid.” It is apologist nonsense and shouldn’t be tolerated. It is the reason that we are in this mess. It is a failing of an older generation, not today’s children. Stop projecting this on to today’s children. She closes: ‘Readers are guardians’ - good readers like us, of course… so much self-aggrandizing bull. Good readers - good reading - is obviously important. But claiming that your skill will be society’s saving grace is oh so trite and pathetic. Her take away on how to lead a good reading life: Festina Lente, or hurry slowly. Well I will leave you instead with my own latin expression you could take a note of: quiquid Latine dictum sit altum videtur.

There are a lot of books and articles (sorry if that isn’t deep enough reading for you) that contain anything of merit that this book might hold. But a lot of them come without the judgement, elitism, baggage, and extremely boring summary of how the brain reads (it is good, dense stuff I’m sure she loves – it is an instant sleep-inducer for the rest of us). Dear Reader, stay away.

~BPL

[afoolsingenuity]

Five Reasons To… Read The City of Brass

The City of Brass (The Daevabad Trilogy #1) – S.A. Chakraborty

Published: 8th March 2018 (UK) Source: Book box/Edelweiss Genre: Fantasy, Historical, Young Adult My Rating:

Step into The City of Brass, the spellbinding debut from S. A. Chakraborty—an imaginative alchemy of The Golem and the Jinni, The Grace of Kings, and One Thousand and One Nights, in which the future of a magical Middle Eastern kingdom rests in the hands of a clever and defiant young con artist with miraculous healing gifts Nahri has never believed in magic. Certainly, she has power; on the streets of 18th century Cairo, she’s a con woman of unsurpassed talent. But she knows better than anyone that the trade she uses to get by—palm readings, zars, healings—are all tricks, sleights of hand, learned skills; a means to the delightful end of swindling Ottoman nobles.

But when Nahri accidentally summons an equally sly, darkly mysterious djinn warrior to her side during one of her cons, she’s forced to accept that the magical world she thought only existed in childhood stories is real. For the warrior tells her a new tale: across hot, windswept sands teeming with creatures of fire, and rivers where the mythical marid sleep; past ruins of once-magnificent human metropolises, and mountains where the circling hawks are not what they seem, lies Daevabad, the legendary city of brass?a city to which Nahri is irrevocably bound.

In that city, behind gilded brass walls laced with enchantments, behind the six gates of the six djinn tribes, old resentments are simmering. And when Nahri decides to enter this world, she learns that true power is fierce and brutal. That magic cannot shield her from the dangerous web of court politics. That even the cleverest of schemes can have deadly consequences.

After all, there is a reason they say be careful what you wish for . . .

I can probably think of more than five reasons to read The City of Brass but I will attempt to be concise and give you the best reasons for reading this utterly amazing book, even if it does involve convincing you folks to read the first book in yet another series. Actually, I’ll probably just try not flail too much and actually write coherent sentences because this was me after finishing:

Complex and Interesting Characters

The characters in this book were the best. Nahri was this amazing con artist. She could sense illness in people and she also conned the rich out of their money to fuel her pursuit of moving to be able to pursue being a doctor. Despite her abilities and their unknown origin, she didn’t believe in magic until a djinn (daeva) arrives in her life and she discovers there is an entire city of djinn called Daevabad. I loved how Nahri may have discovered a world of magic, demons and djinn but she never loses who she is and wants to be. Sure, she takes moments to question what she wants but she is still her own person and tries to avoid being swept away.

Then there is Dara, the mysterious djinn Nahri summons who has a dark past he mostly can’t remember and the bits which he does don’t always shine himself in the best light. He remembers a different world to the one he arrives in and although he wasn’t always a good person I did love him and the connection he built with Nahri. He was the man who introduced her to this other world and the two built a bond from that and helped one another grow.

There was also Prince Ali, one of the sons of the current ruler of Daevabad. I didn’t always love his actions or agree with his opinions but he did add a whole other element to the story. I won’t reveal the reasons why but Dara and Ali didn’t get along or agree on all things. They were on opposite sides of things and I sided much more with Dara on this but Ali wasn’t all bad. He was blunt and interesting and he was a good friend to Nahri even if he was far too blind to the faults of those closest to him.

Amazing World Building

The world Nahri and all of the characters inhabit is such an interesting one. Seeing how the world of the djinn overlapped with the human world was so cool. And then there was the city of Daevabad, that entire city was so interesting. It genuinely felt like a real place. I could visualise that city and the people living in it. It was fully fleshed and so interesting. You can tell that research went into studying the historical period the book is set and also in learning about the cultures which influenced those of the djinn. It wasn’t just one culture but multiple ones which influenced the different types of djinn. I thought it was a highlight of the book how real the world the characters inhabited was.

Family Mystery

Nahri had no knowledge of her own family. She didn’t question her origins too much on the streets of Cairo as she had to spend far more time concentrating on surviving and passing under the radar of the authorities as not all she did was strictly legal. It meant that as time went on and she learnt more about her possible past (and Dara’s past) the more intrigued I was and I just know that this will get explored in the next book (which I totally want in my hands now… I cannot be wishing away the year though). I think the mystery of both her origins and those of Dara led me to get sucked in as you see small hints of the past but there is so much more to be explored as the series progresses.

Djinn! (Or Daeva if You’re That Kind Of Guy)

This was such an original take on djinn. I haven’t read a lot of books featuring djinn anyway, but this one was so unique. The djinn and their society were so interesting. It was so similar to human society anyway which is logical but it was also unique. Each type of djinn had their own culture and each was so individually defined by both appearance but also their beliefs. Their abilities weren’t just chalked up as being magic but instead, there were abilities which folks tended to and then the half djinn, shafits, who were treated as lesser beings. Some of the mixed blood people also possessed abilities and I would be very interested to see why some did and some didn’t. There was the daeva (who took on the original name of the djinn) who were fire-based djinn and there were a large variety of others. The different djinn tribes actually lead on to the next point.

An Interesting Take On Racism and Religion And Class Which We Can All Relate To

One of the elements I liked most about this book is that it showed the mirroring of certain elements of the human world in that of the djinn. As soon as we were introduced to the world of the djinn through the eyes of Ali and then later Nahri it was obvious to me that there was discrimination against the shafts with the view that full-blooded djinn as being superior to those of the half blood shafit. It was similar to the pureblood superiority seen in Harry Potter but in City of Brass it goes beyond that with those in the different djinn tribes having their own rivalries.

The corruption seen in the ruling class of the djinn also meant viewing full blooded djinn as superior to those of the half blood shafits. They also had the view that the Daeva tribe were backward as they had their own religion whilst the rest of the djinn had a new different religion which was adopted and these divisions split the focus of the djinn and weakened them allowing corruption to spread.

I have to say, whilst the divisions in djinn society weren’t always comfortable to read because it made me so angry but it is one thing I love about fantasy reads. Even with its historical setting it was brilliant at highlighting the ingrained biases which occur in society and fantasy is an excellent way of achieving this. It was brilliant!

Have you read this and if so what are your reasons for others to read (if you loved it as much as I did)? And what’s your favourite fantasy read of late?

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[makeitwithmike]

5 Powerful Writing Books For Mastering The Art of Web Copywriting

By Jini Maxin

Words sell your wares online… it’s true! Even if you load your website with images and rely on a high-res Instagram account, you still need well-written captions and concise CTAs.

Create a website minus any copy and see what happens. I bet Google spiders won’t crawl your pages. Your website won’t rank well in SERPs. And traffic won’t come your way.

Here’s why: because Google recognizes words and not images. Words are the true currency of the web.

But of course you need to string pearls and not potatoes together to create compelling content for your online wares. Whether it be it your product descriptions, website text, marketing eblasts, blog posts or newsletters, believe me when I say that every word you use has a definite role to play when it comes to your conversion rate.

If your words don’t mean a thing to users, it would defeat the very purpose of coming up with a good product or service in the first place, right?

But given that there are over 1,000,000,000 websites in the world competing for attention, it’s intimidating even trying to write well, let alone actually doing it. Here are five powerful books that will help you get on the right track.

1. ‘Web Copy That Sells’ by Maria Veloso

Do you think web copywriting and print copywriting are the same thing?

If, yes, then you are wrong my friend.

And you don’t have to just take my word for it. Read Web Copy That Sells by Mario Veloso and all your doubts will be allayed.

For me, this book was an eye-opener. As a fan of fictional books, I would go to great lengths to make sure my business blog posts sounded like one of the authors I was currently stuck on… be it J.K. Rowling, Stephen King, Clive Cussler, Kathy Reichs or Cecelia Ahern.

But then, Mario Veloso’s book came to my attention and I thought, what am I doing?! Sense, finally, struck.

Principles of print shouldn’t be applied to the web; the book made this point loud and clear. Your web copy is intended for one purpose: to make sales, not to win some Man Booker or Pulitzer Prize. You’ve still got to craft the copy but it should be fairly concise and to-the-point.

Bottom line: Cut the clutter. Inject some emotion.

That said, don’t stop reading fictional stuff. Do not, I repeat, do not stop reading fictional stuff. Because it gets your emotional juices flowing. And sometimes, you can derive some amazing concepts out of it. Check out my previous post here, which was heavily influenced by the Harry Potter series.

Key takeaways:

Write advertorial copy – no direct selling messages, please.

Use plain and simple words that will appeal to your target audience.

Keep the content scannable for people who read on smartphones or tablets.

Focus on bite-sized chunks and avoid corporate speak.

Use text boxes while introducing stories, testimonials and case studies.

Employ the cliffhanger principle to make people click to another page.

This is the ultimate book in web copywriting, in my opinion. It really gets you thinking about how to write perfect web copy and the psychology behind it. It teaches you how to mathematically calculate the selling ability of your website and trains you to write copy that gets readers salivating for your product or service.

2. ‘On Writing Well’ by William Zinsser

If you are planning to read only one book on writing this year, then this should be the book. I simply cannot stress enough how much this classic text on writing can help you improve your writing style. It’s practically a bible for those who love words.

When I came across it, I was super desperate to make my technical copy sound… well… super technical.

On Writing Well helped me figure out how and since then, honestly speaking, my writing has changed for the better.

It helps you focus enough on using short words, shorter sentences and shorter paragraphs. It teaches you that just because you’re writing technical copy, there’s no need to overstuff it with technical jargon that makes no sense to the general population (i.e., non-technical folks).

This is important because the majority of online readers include non-technical folks as well, and it’s equally important for them to figure what all the fuss is all about, especially if you are looking for more ‘likes’ and ‘shares’ for your post on social media.

Furthermore, the writing principles included in this book are generic in nature and thus can be applied to all domains of writing.

Key takeaways:

If any technical expert says your piece is ‘dumb’, that’s their problem, not yours. Strengthen your piece with your own experience and be sincere. Your best credential is yourself.

Think small. Decide what corner of your subject you’re going to bite off and be content to cover it and stop.

Express your opinions. Use ‘I’ wherever you can.

Find more about this book: The 30th Anniversary Edition On Writing Well by William Zinsser

3. ‘On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft’ by Stephen King

The lover of night and the macabre, Stephen King, has no fewer than 66 non-fiction books to his name. On Writing: 10th Anniversary Edition: A Memoir of the Craft is his one non-fiction offering and it’s insanely popular. Writers everywhere use it as a resource to read, think and act upon.

It’s part memoir, part craft of writing. It details King’s early years in the company of a single mother who encouraged him to write his own original stuff; his constant tug-of-war with his insecurities; his experience working in a laundry while writing his popular novel Carrie; and writing 2,000 words every damn day.

There’s a complete chapter on King’s writing ‘toolbox’ as well. However, the most important takeaway is his attitude to writing; which can be explained thus: “you must not come lightly to the blank page.”

Simply put, writing is hard work. Be prepared to put in the hours.

Key takeaway:

“One of the really bad things you can do to your writing is to dress up the vocabulary, looking for long words because you’re maybe a little ashamed of your short ones.”

4. ‘Syntax and Sin’ by Constance Hale

“One pearl is better than a whole necklace of potatoes.” That’s the opening line of Syntax and Sin and it had me hooked from the get-go – that’s why I used it in the start of this post.

The author, Constance Hale, aptly describes empty words as ‘potatoes’ and rich words as ‘pearls’. In her opinion, only a few words are fit to be strung into a sentence and it’s the job of the writer to identify them and pull them together – word by word.

The book partly deals with grammar rules, and partly with tips on how to produce ‘sinfully’ good prose. And, if you suffer from the misconceived notion that grammar books are dry and stuffy, rest assured that Syntax and Sin is nothing of the sort.

It’s one of the hippest grammar books I’ve ever read. The writing is out of this world, and the grammar lessons are extraordinary. It makes you want to write. It’s so inspirational.

Some of the examples of how to write the ‘perfect lead’ literally give you awestruck moments thanks to Hale’s straightforward approach and matter-of-fact tone.

If you are hoping to make the lead sentence of your blog posts stop the reader dead in their tracks, read this book.

Key takeaway:

“One pearl is better than a whole necklace of potatoes.”

5. ‘Penguin Guide To Punctuation’ by R.L. Trask

Do you know exactly when to use the capital letter ‘P’ for President and small letter ‘p’ for president? Do you know about the four types of commas? Or do you worry that your web copy is riddled with tiny errors that could cost you credibility?

If so, then you need to go order the Penguin Guide to Punctuation. The book literally proves that big things come in small packages. All 156 pages in length, it sheds light on the proper usage of colons, semi-colons, apostrophes, quotation marks, italics, boldface and much more in an easily digestible way.

This book is actually the only reference tool you need for grammar and punctuation.

Key takeaways:

Differences in American usage and British usage are very precise, and very important.

As a general rule, never use an apostrophe in writing plural forms. It is absolutely wrong to write pizza’s, video’s, fine wine’s, cream tea’s, and mountain bike’s.

Conclusion

Whether it’s one of them or all of them, the books above are of indispensable value to aspiring or indeed seasoned copywriters. Two other books, On Writing Life by Annie Dilliard and The War of Art by Steven Pressfield, are also great resources and well worth a read, especially the latter one.

Now, it’s your turn. Tell me, which writing books have inspired you to come up with better web copy, and other marketing communications?

I would love to hear what has helped you shoot up your dull sales.

Guest Author: Jini Maxin is a senior writer at OpenXcell – a top Mobile App Development Company. She has a masters degree in journalism and mass communications and is a frequent contributor to several top online publications and websites. Her favorite pastimes include reading books (both fiction and nonfiction) and being introspective. Get in touch with her on Linkedin and Twitter.

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