#can't wait to be even more goofy and silly next year

[fayoftheforest]

I posted 2,276 times in 2022

That's 715 more posts than 2021!

97 posts created (4%)

2,179 posts reblogged (96%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@croissants-andcoffee

@plugnuts

@jmax523

@whatdoessunshinetastelike

@fishtish

I tagged 1,260 of my posts in 2022

Only 45% of my posts had no tags

#south park - 57 posts

#ask - 43 posts

#fave - 27 posts

#ask game - 17 posts

#birthfay 🎂 - 14 posts

#sp kyle - 12 posts

#sp k2 - 11 posts

#writing - 10 posts

#headcanons - 10 posts

#south park fic - 10 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#also just realised the blurb i pasted here was from an old draft where the soulmate tag was on their arm not their chest 😳how embarrassing

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

man, it kind of bums me out how the majority of the time that kyle's jewishness is a focal point in fan content, it's for a negative reason. if kyle's contemplating the fact that he's jewish, it's because he's being bullied or harassed, because he's feeling insecure about his appearance or self worth, because he's feeling lonely and isolated, because he's having a crisis of faith, etc etc. these are all totally valid themes and character arcs to explore, of course! i think many jews like myself may be able to relate to these themes, thanks to living in a society where antisemitism and other shitty behaviour runs rampant. but i think we're really missing a golden opportunity to explore the complex and compelling positives of being jewish. where's his love for his community? where's his excitement for an upcoming holiday? where's the comfort he might take from prayers? where's his curiosity or knowledge about his family history? where's his passion for debating interpretations of the torah? these are also valid, relatable and in-character directions you could take things!

i know that this trend is probably heavily influenced by the presence of this pattern in the show itself, but it's still a bit sad. or maybe gentiles (non-jews) shy away from celebrating his jewishness because they don't feel confident in commenting on a religious experience that they've never had. to those people, I would ask, why is it you feel comfortable speculating on the hardships of being jewish, but not the joys?

that isn't to say that you're not allowed to write about the former if you're not jewish, of course! regardless of religious background, anyone can empathise with his struggles because, at the end of the day, we're all human, and it's our humanity that unites us. but i'd encourage you to push yourself out of your comfort zone, do a little research and have some fun celebrating and supporting his jewishness once and awhile :)

109 notes - Posted October 30, 2022

#4

today I am thinking about... fat tweek! and fat butters! and fat wendy and heidi! maybe throw a lil fat kyle in there too! I'm sick and tired of fatness being equated with immorality when it comes to south park (and the world in general tbh) and it makes me sad that so many people seem afraid of portraying any of the non-cartman characters as plus-sized. 'fat' is a neutral descriptor and not a dirty word, and displaying body diversity amongst the cast is not only realistic, but a wonderful and beautiful thing! so anyway reblog this and put in the tags which character(s) you've always headcanoned to be fat or not skinny :)

113 notes - Posted August 21, 2022

#3

STOP RIGHT THERE 🔫 THIS IS A STICK-UP 🔫 NOBODY SCROLLS ON UNTIL THEYVE WATCHED @roostertuftart 'S GLORIOUS VIDEO THEN REBLOGGED IT 🔫

142 notes - Posted August 29, 2022

#2

I'M ABSOLUTELY BLOODY LOSING IT OVER THESE VINTAGE SOUTH PARK MUGS I FOUND ONLINE

THE CAPTIONS. THEIR EXPRESSIONS. THE FACT THAT STAN IS KNOWN AS "THE CUTE ONE"?? LIKE?? IS HE?? WACK :D ANYWAY SHOULD I BUY THESE YES/NO

256 notes - Posted November 16, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

fucking obsessed with this meme that came up on my pinterest feed

what IS up with gay eople liking south park???

1,222 notes - Posted November 15, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[queenpiranhadon]

what are your thoughts on katsuki's reaction when he finds out his partner has the same spice tolerance as him...

A/N: Oh, anon don't worry I have MORE than just thoughts... I actually love this prompt so I'm gonna write it a little differently than usual :) Here's the masterlist!

Warning(s): Cursing, reader likes spicy food, second or third year-ish, fluff, pre-established relationship, standard partner nicknames are used - dummy, babe, baby, etc, reader is gn but is written with f!reader in mind, double dates but it's just silly goofy

Pairing(s): Bakugou Katsuki x Reader, Mina Ashido x Ejiro Kirishima

•─────•°•❀•°•──── ᴡᴀꜱᴀʙɪ ─────•°•☁︎•°•────•

So from your wording, Bakugou finds out about your spice preferences at some point during your relationship, instead of before, which I don't think is as plausible because of his insane perception skills (he probably knows more about you than even you do before you guys even start dating- my man is a closeted nerd and you can't convince me otherwise). But if he did find out while you two were dating, the outcome would be hilarious.

Let's say you're in the UA dorms, whether you're in the hero course on not, you're just chilling in the kitchen waiting for your boyfriend to meet you downstairs. Class 1-A loves you a ton, and even though they tease you and Bakugou a lot, you both end up having a lot of Netflix and chill dates in the common room since the TV there has a shit ton of streaming services.

You put down your phone, sighing, and decide to be a little more productive instead- making your way to the common room to pick out a movie. It was tradition, between you, Katsuki, Kirishima and Mina to watch movies together every now and then as a double date- something Katsuki was adverse to but you knew he secretly enjoyed the chaos that ensued whenever the four of you were together- also realizing that if they weren't in his line of sight, they'd probably end up blowing up the dorms by accident anyways. He'd only said this once though, face turning bright red as you teasingly called him a mother hen.

Mina and Kirishima had started dating a few months ago (you and Katsuki had celebrated your 1 year anniversary two weeks prior to it ) and being the friend group you were, who could pass up an opportunity?. Kirishima and Katsuki very best friends, as were you and Mina, so it was a no-brainer that the four of you would have regular get togethers like this in the first place. You thought it was nice, seeing Katsuki interact with his friends as he relaxed, even if only a little, around his close friends.

You settle yourself down in the plush couch across from the TV screen, and feel the cushions dip as a new weight is added, seeing Mina Ashido plopping down next to you.

"Movie night!" she cheers, and she nudges you with her shoulder. "Some day we gotta ditch the boys and get through a movie marathon together- I swear Eji has the worst taste in movies, if I have to watch another Star Wa-"

"Hey! My taste isn't that bad!" Kirishima whines, coming up behind the both of you with Katsuki in tow. "Plus you keep asking to watch those K-dramas that get your mascara running."

Mina raises an eyebrow. "Eji, you cry more than I do during those."

Katsuki sighs and raises his hand in an attempt for peace. "Oi, shut yer mouths and go grab the pillows and blankets. Y/N and I will order food and pick out the movie."

Mina groans but relents, looking at you pleadingly. "Please chose a good movie - no ‘to be continued’s PLEASE"."

You snort, remembering how one time Kirishima had chosen Captain America: The Winter Soldier, which prompted the four of you to binge the entire MCU on a day without classes.

Scrolling through movies, you decide to choose a classic- the Matrix, something action packed enough to keep Kirishima (and Katsuki's) attention, and something with enough romance to keep Mina hooked.

As you navigate through the countless streaming services, Katsuki's voice pops up behind you.

"Oi, babe what do ya want to eat? Got some rolls dipped in wasabi for myself...I already know Shitty Hair's gonna ask for some chicken wings- an I got some tacos for Pinky cause I know she was whinin about cravin Mexican food earlier..."" He trails off, embarrassed when you grin knowingly in his direction.

You decide to be merciful though, shrugging and returning back to the TV. "I know very well that you're going to order from three different places just so all of us get what we want so I'll just share with you." you smile, and Bakugou's heart thumps softly from your thoughtfulness.

"Tch- whatever dummy. What do ya want in them- I know my rolls are pretty fuckin spicy - avocado, shrimp, cr-" He asks, but you cut his off with a bewildered look.

"What? Why wouldn't I get it with wasabi??" You ask dumbfounded. "That's like 85% of the flavor - plus it's kinda boring without it." you say, and your boyfriend's jaw drops open- as if you'd told him you were pregnant of something.

"Marry me."

You want to burst out in giggles, but stop when you see the deadass look on his face.

"Kats-"

"Jesus Christ baby, of all the shit ya hide from me, ya hide the most important one?!" He asks incredulously and that's when you start laughing.

"If ya told me this shit sooner I would've asked yer ass out the moment I met ya."

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Chapter 20 pt. 2- I Do

Summary: It's wedding time, baby.

Word Count: 17.4K (.....I'm so sorry)

Warnings: SMUT (18+) unprotected p in v sex, vaginal fingering, praise kink, marriage kink, big, fat, nasty, unspeakable breeding kink (holy SHIT you guys, I really went balls to the wall on this one, I fear), kind of semi-public sex (you already know these horndogs are going at it again), More getting caught (Steve is causing his own problems at this point), wedding things!!, family dynamics, mentions of death/grief, lots of emotions, alcohol/drinking, so many feelings (grab the tissues, friends), Javi being adorable with kids, Javi being so in LOVE it HURTS?!? So much joy and happiness because Javi deserves the world and more

A/N: HELLO. Part 2 is finally finished *insert Spongebob narrator voice* 4 years later 🫠 Omg y'all, thank you SO much for bearing with me as I finish this, it has been a labor of love like no other, but I am so excited to finally share our favorite couple's special day and finally GET THESE TWO MARRIED 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I would very much be lying if I said I didn't cry multiple times writing this chapter 🥺 I can't believe these two are actually getting married- words can't express how thankful I am for everyone who's wanted to stick around and read my silly little story to see these two make it to their wedding day- your support and kind words mean more to me than you will ever know 💛 Poorly beta'd bc I'm the worst, also, I've seen that sometimes people have issues reblogging things with comments that are this long (my apologies), but comments and reblogs make me wanna cry and throw up with joy, so it means a lot to me if you're able to leave a comment if it won't let you reblog with one!!!

Series Masterlist Next Chapter Previous Chapter

Never had you been so anxious to walk in a straight line. 

Because truth be told, that was all you needed to do to walk down the aisle- walk in a straight line. 

But when that straight line meant the walk to finally get to marry your future husband, to take his last name, to start the beginning of your forever together, not to mention kissing him in front of all your closest family and friends, you couldn’t help but feel the butterflies in your stomach swirling in anticipation as you waited for your ceremony to start. 

“You okay, Hermosa?” Javi asked, his thumb gently stroking your hand that he had been holding since the moment he saw you, almost as if he was refusing to let go. You looked up at him, big brown puppy dog eyes staring down at you with a goofy grin that hadn’t left his face, the sight of his handsome, broad frame easing your racing heart enough to help you remember that when you walked down that aisle in a few short minutes, he was the only thing that mattered. 

“I’m perfect.” You smiled, pressing up on your toes just enough to peck his lips quickly before someone in the wedding party needed to barrate you both again about saving your kissing until after you were finally married. “I don’t think I’ve ever had this many people staring all at me at once. Knowing my luck, I’m gonna trip and fall over this dress before I can even make it to you. Or better yet, with my dumbass decision to have David and Charlie walk me down the aisle, I’ll be lucky if they don’t push me to the ground first.” 

“Well, even if you did fall, you would still be the most beautiful woman on the face of this Earth. My clumsy, grass-stained wife.” Javi snickered, giving you a little nudge as you rolled your eyes, giving him a playful shove back. 

“Pendejo. You have both of our vows books, right? You promise you haven’t peeked?” 

“Yup, both right here in my pocket.” Javi smiled, patting his tux by his chest. “Promise I haven’t read it. Although for my sake I probably should have, because if I can’t even make it through seeing you in your dress, then these vows are gonna make me a fuckin’ goner.” 

“Bold of you to assume I had nice things to say about you in there.” You teased, raising your eyebrow as you smirked at him, making Javi shake his head as he laughed. 

“Alright everyone, it’s 3:00, it’s time to get this show on the road! Make sure you’re in order like we practiced, that you take your time walking down to the music, girls, please do not throw petals at each other, and make sure you all- Javi, where are you? You’re supposed to be at the front of this line, sir.” Connie sassed, proving to you that she really was the perfect person for the task of making sure that things ran smoothly today, bossing the group around like the captain of a well organized ship. 

“Sorry, I’m coming,” Javi replied sheepishly. “I love you, Osita.” Sliding the hand that was entangled with yours around your waist, Javi pulled you in for a kiss, much more obviously than he probably should have, considering the shit the two of you were about to get being literal minutes away from getting married. 

“Javier! Get you A-S-S up here! Kiss her all you want once you say I do!” Connie shouted, rolling her eyes at the two of you, Javi pulling away in defense with his hands raised, trying to prove his innocence. 

“Oh, I know what that one spells, Mrs. Murphy! That one spells-” 

“Javi? Please?” Connie asked again, quickly trying her best to cut off your niece, Olivia, before she could finish the rest of her thought in front of everyone else, making the group giggle at her matter of factness. 

“Okay, okay, I’m here!” Javi pleaded, making his way to the front of the procession, taking his place next to his dad as Connie did one more check through of everyone’s spot in line before giving the music an all clear to start playing. 

As you stood at the end of the line, you peeked up to see Javi turned around staring back at you with that same stupid smile on his face, completely enamored and awestruck by you, already convincing you that you were going to turn into a puddle before you could even make it down the aisle. 

But as you went to re-adjust your bouquet in your grasp, you quickly realized there were not one, but two things missing from your procession line, now about to start walking down the aisle. 

Your brothers. 

Despite having seen them only seconds ago, as you quickly whipped your head around, they were now nowhere to be found. 

“Charlie? David? Where the fuck did you go?” You whisper shouted, frantically looking around for any sight of them.

Suddenly, you heard a rustling from one of the bushes around the corner from where you had been lined up and waiting, followed by the all too familiar voices of your brothers up to no good. 

“Just finish it you dingus, I already drank the first half!” 

“Why the fuck did we leave this out here? It’s fucking warm. You got the better half, that’s not fair!” 

“It was warm when I drank it too, dumbwad. Just finish it, we gotta fucking go, hurry up!” 

As you peered behind the bush, you saw your brothers wiping their mouth with the back of their hands as the tossed a can of Miller Lite to the ground, freezing in fear as they saw your menacing and disappointed glare staring back at them. 

“What the fuck do you two think you’re doing?!” 

“It was David’s idea!” Charlie responded, pointing at his brother. 

“Charlie didn’t say no!” David responded back, now pointing at him. “You didn’t expect us to get through this sober, did you? You’re the one who asked us to marry you, so I don’t know what to tell ya, Cubby. Plus, we wanted to pour one out for Patrick since he’s the luckiest bastard out of all of us and doesn’t have to worry about fucking up marrying his little sister.” 

“God, you two are idiots. Well that thing you agreed to do is happening as we speak so can we go do that, please?” You sighed, trying your best not to laugh at your brother’s antics, knowing that you really should have expected nothing less from the pair after you and Javi had asked them to officiate your wedding, considering neither of you had wanted anything religious, and wanted someone who knew you to be the ones to do it. 

“Okay, okay!” They replied, one rushing to each side of you and hooking their arm around yours as you made your way back to your spot at the end of the processional line that had now begun to move forward. 

“Where were you 3 dumbbells? The ceremony is starting!” Your dad gruffed, trying his best to restrain from slapping each of you upside the head. 

“Cubby wanted a beer.” David replied, shrugging his shoulders, keeping his head facing forward, trying his best not to laugh. 

“Honey, seriously?!” Your mom scolded, looking at you with disgust. 

“I did not! I was trying to find these two idiots!” You groaned, eying your brothers as they shook you back and forth between them in their grasp. “I hate you both, I hope you know that.” 

“We love you too, Cubby.” Charlie smirked, knowing that for as much as you said it, there wasn’t a bone in your body that could hate your brothers. For as dumb and annoying as they were, there would never be another moment you would take for granted with them, knowing all too well that life was much too short to do anything but cherish your time together, wishing you had more time to spend with the brother who couldn’t be here with you today. 

Before you could respond, your thought was interrupted by the voice of the DJ through the speakers set up outside, your heart steadily beginning to pound at the reality that everything you had been waiting for was all about to become real. 

“Alright, ladies and gentlemen if you could please find your seats, we’re about to get started with our ceremony! Thank you so much, folks!” As his voice echoed through the speakers, a hush began to fall over the crowd of your friends and family that had gathered here, now anxiously alongside you for the ceremony to begin. 

A few seconds passed before you could hear the music beginning to play, the familiar melody of “Everywhere” by Fleetwood Mac ringing through the speakers- an easily unanimous pick for a song to walk down the aisle to for you and Javi, remembering the first night you had spent together in your apartment, making midnight mac n’ cheese and already falling head over heels in love with each other. 

As the beat began to pick up, your heart started to race, peaking over the backs of everyone’s heads to watch all 5 of your flower girls begin to skip down the aisle, throwing petals every which way around them as they moved.

You couldn’t help but laugh as all their little personalities shone through as they made their way to the altar- Olivia Murphy, being the oldest, most definitely was taking her role the most seriously, holding her baby sister in one hand and carefully sprinkling flowers evenly in front of her. Your niece, Olivia, was second in line to live up to her role, although, being the little ham she was, threw in the occasional twirl in the middle of the aisle to get people to look at her, along with her little waves to the crowd. The rest of the girls, Brianna, Abby and Madison, well, you were just happy that they made it down the aisle, thankful that their older sisters were at least on the lookout enough to keep them from running through the rows of your guests or dumping the entire bucket of flowers on themselves (you had learned your lesson from your rehearsal dinner that Brianna needed about half as less flowers as the others).

Your face lit up watching the girls, your heart filling with joy with the “awhs” and laughter from the crowd at their theatrics as they met at the altar with an impressively semi-rehearsed curtsy, followed by promptly running out of the spotlight and over to Connie who was waiting for them. 

Now that the flower girls had finished making their way down, the processional line began to shift forward once again, this time, leaving Javi and his dad to walk down together, Javi insisting that even though his mom would have been the one to walk him down if she was here, that wanted Chucho to be there in her place instead. 

“Ready, Mijo?” Chucho grinned, giving Javi a little nudge. “Am I going to have to keep you from sprinting down the aisle, or do you think you can manage walking?” 

As the pair began walking down to the melodic beat of the song, Javi couldn’t help but laugh at his dad’s comment, because as much as he wanted to tease him right back, he knew damn well he was so excited that he would have run to the altar if it meant he got to marry you even a minute quicker. 

“Javier?” Chucho asked, looking up at his son with tears in his eyes as the pair moved down the parted pathway between the crowd of guests. 

“Yeah, Pops?” 

“Estoy orgulloso de ti, mijo. Tu mama y yo. (I am so proud of you, son. Me and your mother.) We are so happy that you have found your media naranja (other half). Nosotros te amamos. (We love you so much.)” 

As Javi and Chucho reached the end of the aisle, Javi wrapped his arms around his dad, pulling him close as Chucho patted him on the back, pulling away to look at his son, tears now in both of their eyes, thinking about how far they had come to end up where they were in this very moment, thanking whatever greater power that had finally brought them and Lucia the peace they all desperately deserved. 

Javier Pena knew he was worthy of the love and happiness that his parents had longed for. He had finally proved to himself and his parents he really was the good man that he had hoped to be. 

“I love you, Pops. Thank you for everything.” Javi whispered to his dad, trying to fight back any more tears from falling down his cheeks. 

“Te amo mucho, Javier. (I love you so much, Javier). Thank you for finally realizing that who you are is enough. Now, stop crying over your old man and save some tears for your wife.” Chucho laughed quietly, giving his son another pat on the back with a soft smile wrinkling his cheeks. 

“Yeah, I don’t think you’re gonna have to worry about that.” Javi chuckled, shaking his head at the tearful mess he already was, giving his father one last hug before Chucho took his seat next to Connie and the flower girls at the front of the crowd. 

Steve was the next to make his way to the altar, Javi laughing at his friend’s goofy strut to greet him at the end of the aisle. Steve held out his hand to shake Javi’s before quickly pulling Javi in for another hug with pats to the back much harder than his fathers. 

“Listen, man. I ain’t good at this sentimental shit, but uh- I’m really fuckin’ happy for you, Javi. I know I give you shit, but you’re one of the good ones. She’s a lucky girl. And I hope you know you’re sure as hell one lucky son of a bitch. Love you, man.” 

“Love you too, Murph. Believe me, I know.” Javi grinned, giving Steve a slap on his shoulder laughing to himself as his friend sat down next to his wife and the girls, never imagining himself standing at the altar, happily waiting to get married while his former partner cheered him on, surrounded by his gaggle of giggly daughters. 

Feeling worlds away from Javi, your heart began to beat faster and faster, realizing that you were now only one pair away from making your trek down the aisle as your mom and dad walked down next, arm in arm. 

In classic mom fashion, your mother squeezed Javi so hard as she greeted him, that you were convinced that she was going to pop an eyeball out one of his sockets, thankful that your dad was there to reel her in enough to keep from suffocating him in her hug. 

“Javi. We love you so much. Thank you for making our daughter so happy. We’re so grateful she found you.” 

“Thank you. I love you both, too. Believe me, I’m just as grateful that she found me. Thanks for making me feel like a part of your family.” Javi replied to your mom, catching his breath through his smile after the death grip your mom had wrapped him in before looking over at your dad, extending his hand to meet his already outstretched one. 

“Jav, you’re a good man. I’m a guy of few words, but we couldn’t be happier for you both. Take care of her, okay?” 

“I will. I promise.” 

With a silent handshake and a nod, Javi and your dad had said all they’d needed to know that they couldn’t be more thankful for the love and support the other had brought you in the times that you had needed it most. 

As your parents made their way to their seats, standing at the opposite end of the aisle with your brothers at your side, the realization really hit you- You were the last one that needed to meet Javi. 

“You ready, Cubby?” Charlie asked, giving you a grin as he smiled down at you, interlocking your arm with his as David did the same on the other side. 

“Yeah, I’m ready. Hey, uh- I just, I just wanted to say, I-I love you guys.” 

“Gross.” David teased, scrunching his face in disgust, pretending to barf over his shoulder as you and Charlie laughed, shaking your head at your brother. “We love you too, dude.” 

With one final giggle and deep breath, you took your first step into view where everyone could see you, watching the guests rise to their feet in anticipation of your arrival, awestruck stares and smiles filling the crowd as you began to walk. 

Even though you had seen each other minutes ago, as you started to make your way down the aisle, smiling at Javi, the two of you couldn’t help but break into tears once again, laughing through your sobs that Javi broke before you did, trying to wipe his wet cheeks with the back of his hand while he watched you walk towards him. 

And even though every pair of eyes were on you, the only eyes you needed to see were Javi’s- The sweet, soft brown eyes that you had fallen so deeply in love with from the moment you had locked eyes with them all that time ago. They were the eyes of the first person who had ever truly seen you for who you were, inside and out, and you couldn’t be more thankful that when you looked at him, you saw your forever. When you looked at Javier Pena, you knew you were home. 

It almost felt as if time was standing still, that even in a crowd full of people, no one else existed besides the two of you. No one else mattered, and nothing else mattered- the only thing that mattered for you was Javi waiting for you at the end of the aisle, and you? You were going to finally be his wife. 

“You two are so in love, it’s fucking sick.” David whispered in your ear, helping to ease your tears as you burst into more laughter, rolling your eyes at your brother. 

“Oh shut up, asshole.” 

As you, David and Charlie finally made your way to Javi, waiting for you in a mess of happy smiles and loving tears, you had to use everything in you to keep from jumping onto him like a koala and kiss him all over his stupidly handsome face, resorting to reaching out to grab his hand instead, interlocking it with yours and giving it the tightest squeeze you could. 

“Hey, Mr. Peña. Long time, no see.” You whispered into Javi’s ear, giving him a quick peck on the cheek before took his other hand in yours, the two of you facing each other in front of your friends and family as David and Charlie took their place behind you, pulling out their notes that they had prepared, clearing their throats as they began to address the crowd. 

“Alright everyone, I uh- I guess we’re gettin’ this show on the road.” Speaking out into the crowd, Charlie began to flip to the right page of his script that you were relieved to see he had written out, your guests beginning to silence and bringing their attention to you and Javi. 

“Hi everyone, for those of you who don’t know us, we are the bride’s brothers, and we have the honor of our sister and our new brother-in-law being stupid enough to let us be in charge of marrying them today. Not to worry, 20 dollars and one course on the internet later, David and I are both legally ordained, so not to fear you two, this will all be legit, and hopefully not too embarrassing.” Charlie laughed, also eliciting giggles and eye rolls from you and Javi, as well as the crowd. 

“Well, we are gathered here today, because these two idiots have fallen so head over heels for each other, it's almost sickening. We’ve had the privilege of knowing our sister for the entirety of our lives. When we found out as kids that our mom was having another baby, and that it was going to be a girl, my brothers and I were disappointed, to say the least. We didn’t want a sister to ruin the bond that we had, and honestly, for a long time while my mom was pregnant, we went through a long baby boycott, and were convinced if we protested long enough, and hard enough, she would eventually turn into a boy, and everything would be fine.” David grimaced, shrugging his shoulders at you as you nodded in agreement, having heard this story from your brothers and parents plenty of times before. 

“And while at first, we weren’t really sure what to do with a sister, considering we didn’t even realize it was an option to pee sitting down until she came around,” Charlie snickered, making the crowd laugh again, aside from your mom, who was rolling her eyes so hard, they probably had made it to the back of her head, “Our sister ended up being one of the best things that could have ever happened to us.” 

Breaking your eye contact with Javi, you paused to look over at your brother, a genuine smile on his face, raising his eyebrows and shrugging as if to say I’m just as surprised that I’m saying this out loud as you. 

“Growing up with our sister has taught us a lot of things- Don’t challenge her to anything you don’t wanna lose at, because she’ll find a way to beat you, and thoroughly kick your ass while she does it, she’s got more brain cells that myself, Charlie, and our late brother Patrick did put together, she’s tougher than most guys I know, and she’s one of the biggest hearted people I’ve ever met.” Looking back at Javi, you could see his face beaming with joy, giving your hand a squeeze, agreeing with everything your brothers had to say, and how all of those traits had made him fall so madly in love with you. 

“So, like brothers do, we never assumed that there would never be anyone good enough, let alone even cool enough for our badass sister. And also like brothers do, we let her go through her fair share of duds and gave her shit, but when this guy came around,” Charlie smiled, pointing at Javi, “we knew that he was something special.” 

“Javi,” David joined in pointing, giving him a playful smirk, “Don’t think you were getting out of this so easy. When we first heard that our sister had made her way down to the middle of nowhere Texas and had started seeing you, our first reaction was instant disapproval, because if you lived in south Texas, you probably knew jackshit about hockey, and that was a no go for us.” 

“But,” Charlie interjected, “After talking to our sister more on the phone, not only was she starting to turn into the happy, energetic self we hadn’t seen in so long, we also learned after talking to her that you not only had been willing to watch hockey with her, but had began to openly express your disdain for the Detroit Red Wings, which made us change our opinions on you very quickly.” 

You and Javi looked at your brothers, rolling your eyes in laughter as they shrugged at you, the roar of cackles from the crowd making you grin, feeling the love from your brothers, friends and family swell in your chest, holding Javi’s hands even tighter, gazing up at him with an awestruck smile. 

“No in all seriousness, Jav. We couldn’t be happier that you not only have become a part of our sister’s life, but our family’s life, too. For those of you who don’t know, we um- we, uh-,” David gulped, taking a deep breath, trying to hold back the tears welling in his eyes, “our other brother, Patrick, um, passed away last year, and it uh, it was really hard on all of us, especially our sister. Javi, man, I don’t think you’ll ever understand how thankful we are that you love our sister so unconditionally. Better yet, that you love our family of idiots so unconditionally, because truth be told, we are not an easy bunch to love. While obviously, you can’t ever replace Patrick, I just, I hope you know that we’re so glad to have you as a brother, and that Patrick really would have loved you, man. He would be so happy that you’re the one our sister gets to spend the rest of her life with.” 

For what felt like the 117th time today, you found yourself in absolute tears, feeling the wetness streaming down your cheeks as you looked down at the #2 patch sewn on the bottom corner of your veil in a beautiful mixture of sadness and joy before looking up to see not a dry eye in front of you, both your brothers and Javi misty eyed and sniffling. Breaking his grasp from yours, Javi stepped towards your brothers, wrapping his arms around both of them to pull them into a long, tight hug, Charlie and David reciprocating as their arms patted his back. 

“Thank you guys.” Javi whispered, choking back his tears as he pulled away to look at your brothers, all of you wiping your wet faces with your hands to try and compose yourselves to carry on with the ceremony. 

“Damn, okay, well, sorry about that, folks, was not expecting that.” Charlie and David laughed, trying to shake off their unusually sappy sentiment, looking out at the crowd to see not a dry eye in the house. “Well um, well that’s enough of us yapping at you guys, why don’t we turn it over to the people you’re actually here for, and then you can cry even more because these two idiots decided to write their own vows, so good luck.” 

Staring up at Javi, you could feel your heart begin to race wildly, your hands nearly trembling as you reached out towards Javi to take the little notebook where you had written down your vows, feeling a little more at ease as you saw that Javi’s hands were just as shaky as yours, the two of you overflowing with anxious anticipation. 

It had been no question to either of you that you had wanted to write your own vows to one another. While it seemed to be that everyone else you knew had seemed to avoid writing their own vows because they weren’t sure what to say, or that it was too hard to think of things, you and Javi seemed to find yourselves having the opposite problem, feeling like there was too much to fit in a few short minutes, and that your vows were going to end up being the length of a college lecture. 

There had been a part of you that had worried you would be nervous to read what you had to say to Javi in front of all your friends and family, but as you stood there, smiling up at his beautiful, handsome face, you couldn’t be more excited to share all of the things you had written to tell your husband just how much you loved him.  

But as the two of you stood face to face, your vows in each of your hands, your stomach dropped in shock, realizing that neither of you was making the first move to start talking. Because for all the planning and preparing that you had done for everything else, the both of you had completely forgotten to pick who was going to read their vows first. 

“We never picked who was gonna go first.” You whispered to Javi, your voice filling with nerves every second you stood in front of your guests, neither one of you saying anything. 

“Oh fuck, you’re right. What do you wanna do? Do you wanna go? Do you want me to go?” Javi asked, his face mirroring yours in surprise, now frantically looking back and forth between you, his vows, and all of your guests. 

You weren’t sure if it was the teacher in you, or the fact that you were so flustered that you couldn’t think of anything else, but before you knew it, you were tucking your vows under your arm, holding one hand out in front of you flat and the other in a fist, signifying to Javi that your best solution to your current predicament was playing rock, paper, scissors. 

“Best 2 out of 3?” You shrugged, grimacing at Javi as you tried not to burst into laughter, Javi shaking his head and snickering, raising an eyebrow at you. 

“You’re ridiculous, I hope you know that. Do you wanna go after ‘rock’ or say ‘shoot’, then go?” Javi asked, loud enough for your guests to catch on to what was happening, giggles and laughter coming from the crowd. 

“What kind of psychopath doesn’t say ‘shoot’ first? Javier Peña, are you telling me that we need to call off this wedding right now because you don’t say ‘shoot’ before playing rock, paper, scissors? Because I will.” 

Everyone around you was now in full blown hysterics, including Javi, giving you the sassiest look he could muster through his laughter, holding his hands out to mirror yours. 

“So ‘for better or for worse’ doesn’t apply to rock, paper, scissors, apparently?” He teased, smirking at you with a subtle wink as he bit down on his lip. 

“Not if you’re gonna play like that it won’t.”  

“Pendejo.” 

“You love me.” 

“I really fucking do.” 

Giggling as you gestured at your outstretched fist, you began to countdown from your “rock, paper, scissors, adding an extra emphasis on ‘shoot’ as you held out rock and Javi held out scissors. With another laugh, the two of you started again, this time, you with paper and Javi with rock, smirking as you crossed your arms over your chest at Javi, the rest of your guests laughing right along with you. 

“Winner, winner, chicken dinner, Javier Peña. You’re stuck going second.” 

“Go for it, you dork.” 

As the laughter from the crowd settled, you opened your vows book, taking a deep breath as you stared up at Javi, who, despite your silliness, still had tears beginning to well in his puppy dog brown eyes before you could even say your first word. You took one last gulp of confidence, wondering how in the world you were supposed to make it through even a sentence through your speech without falling apart. 

“I never used to believe in fate. People would always tell me that ‘some things are just meant to be!’ or ‘it was just fate it happened like that!’ and no matter how hard I tried to believe, fate just never made sense to me. Well, that was until about a year ago, when fate decided to bump right into me when I least expected it.” You could feel your voice already beginning to shake, huffing in a quick sniffle before continuing on. 

“As fate may have it, I quite literally bumped into you when you were forced to come give a presentation to a group of rowdy 8 and 9 year olds. Thank god fate also was on my side that day- that I actually looked halfway presentable and wasn’t covered in spilled chocolate milk, glue, or the snot of whatever kid had sneezed a little too close to me that morning.” That one had the better part of the crowd letting out a laugh alongside Javi, easing your stress and tension about your speech while you carried on, reading the notes jotted in your booklet. 

“When I first came to Laredo, I wasn’t really quite sure what I was looking for. After my brother died and decided I needed to be as far away from Chicago as possible, there wasn’t ever really a doubt in my mind that here was the only place I really wanted to be. I spent the better half of my middle school and high school vacations here, visiting my best friend who had moved away. To me, Laredo was always a place that brought me such peace and comfort. I’m not really sure why, but there was always something about being here for those few weeks every year that made it feel like home, even when home was halfway across the country. But what I didn’t realize, was that in my attempt to find a new home for myself, I began to learn that home wasn’t a physical location, or a place you could travel to. After meeting you, Javier Peña, I found out that home was wherever I was with you.” 

Taking a shaky breath, you looked up from your vows to see sweet Javi, covering his mouth, as if he was trying to trap his tears to keep from completely breaking down at your words, his reaction only making you cry harder, trying your best to re-compose yourself before speaking again. 

“I spent so long wondering if I would ever find someone who would ever make me feel the way that you do- to love me for all of my flaws, to make me feel important, and even laugh at all of my stupid jokes that probably don’t deserve to be laughed at, but you love me enough to do it anyways. Now that’s true love.” You smirked, raising your eyebrow at Javi, making the two of you snicker between your tears. “You make me feel like the only person in the world whenever I’m with you. The only person who knows me better than I know myself. You are truly one of the most thoughtful and caring people that I have ever met. And while I could list off a million adjectives to describe all of the reasons I fell in love with you- smart, brave, determined, handsome- just to name a few, out of all of those reasons, the one that made me fall for you the most was your big heart. And while I know you’ll never believe me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to get you to see the same amazing man I fall more and more in love with every single day.”

At this point, there was not a dry eye in the crowd, watching how emotional you and Javi were as you tried to choke your way through the rest of your vows. 

“I will never know what I did to deserve you in my life, but promise that I will spend the rest of it letting you know how forever thankful I will always be that out of all the people in the world you could have chosen to bump into, that it was me. I am so excited that the rest of my life, all of the moments, big, small, and everything in between, will all be moments spent with you. That every moment will be spent with my best friend. I never would have thought that a little bit of fate would have become my forever, but I’ll always be so grateful that it is. I love you so much, Javier Peña. Thanks for being the reason I finally believe in fate.” 

Wiping away the wetness streaming down your cheeks, you could barely even look at Javi, who was an absolute blubbering mess, laughing through your tears almost to keep you from completely melting into a puddle. 

Reaching out to grab him, you took Javi’s hand in yours, squeezing it reassuringly as you took your other hand up to wipe the tears streaming down his cheeks, the both of you smiling as you looked into each other's eyes.

“And that’s why I wanted to go first. Good luck.” You chuckled, making Javi shake his head as he laughed along with you, taking another deep breath before flipping open his own vows, wondering how in the world he was ever going to make it through speaking, considering how easily he had fallen apart just listening to you. 

“Jesus Christ, well I don’t know how I’m really supposed to follow that.” Javi sighed, the crowd giggling at his remark as he opened up to his first page, staring at his words for a moment before looking back up at you, his deep, chocolate, puppy dog eyes melting you just as quickly as the first time that you locked eyes with him. 

“I’ve uh- I’ve never really been great speeches. When I sat down to write this, I wasn’t really sure where to start. I had no idea how I was supposed to fit all of the things that I wanted to say into all of this.” Javi huffed with a little shrug, gesturing to his notebook. 

“So I um- I figured if there’s anywhere I should start, it should probably be at the beginning. My mom was an elementary school teacher, so growing up, I spent a lot of time at Alma Pierce Elementary School. I swear, I knew that place like the back of my hand. But um, after my mom got sick and passed away, I really never thought I’d ever have a reason to back. Until one day last year, I was told to pack up my stuff to go give a presentation at a local elementary school, which turned out to be none other than Alma Pierce. My mom always used to say “La vida es graciosa, no lo crees?” (Life is funny, isn’t it?), and I never quite understood why. But as I walked back into the place where I had spent so much of my life just out of chance, I swear I could hear her laughing at me, saying “Te lo dije.” (I told you so).” 

You could hear everyone who had had the privilege of knowing Lucia letting out a soft laugh, thinking of all of the times they must have heard her say that all too familiar phrase throughout their time knowing her. 

“I had gotten to a point in my life that I had kind of just accepted that maybe this kind of life wasn’t in the cards for me. I wasn’t gonna get married or have a family, and as much as it hurt, I had learned to be okay with it. The last thing I would have thought would have happened to me after leaving the presentation I had to give that day was that I was already head over heels in love with the most beautiful woman I had ever seen in my entire life, but la vida es graciosa, no le crees?” 

Giving you a little smirk, Javi could help but let a smile slowly spread between his cheeks as he looked at you, gazing up at him in complete and utter adoration, your goofy grin mirroring his. 

“Never in a million years would I have thought that I would have been standing here today, getting married to you. If you would have told me that I got to marry the most beautiful, amazing, kind, and stubbornly independent woman on the face of this earth, I would have laughed in your face. I honestly still feel like I need to pinch myself to prove that this is even real. But I guess that even if this is all a dream, I don’t ever want to wake up. Being loved by you has changed me in a way that I will never be able to thank you enough for. Being loved by you has made me a better man than I ever believed that I could be. A better man than I ever thought I deserved to be. A man who has learned to love and believe in love in ways I didn’t think I was capable of. I will never be able to thank you enough for letting me into your life and loving me for who I am, and for wanting to spend the rest of it with me.” 

Now, it was your turn to morph into an inconsolable mess, reaching out to grab Javi’s hand again, silently reassuring him that you were equally as grateful for the fact that Javi had let you into his life, too. 

“And no matter how tough, or challenging, or funny life gets, I know it can never really be that bad, because I’ll always have you by my side through it all. I think my mamá would be so proud to know I finally understand what she was trying to say all those years about life being so funny. Because it seems like life has a funny way of giving you everything you’ve ever wanted. Te amo, Osita. Gracias por ser mi todo. (I love you, Osita. Thank you for being my everything).” 

Without even thinking, you threw your arms around Javi’s shoulders wrapping him in a long, tight hug, sobbing into his jacket in a fit of happy tears, Javi hugging you right back, squeezing around your waist, gently cradling the back of your head in the warmth of your embrace. 

“Well shit… Alright, well I’m not sure if you guys are allowed to do that, but after those vows, I think we can let it slide.” David joked, trying to quickly wipe his eyes, nudging Charlie to do the same to try and pull themselves together to make sure they could finish out the rest of the ceremony. 

“Fuck, sorry.” Javi whispered, reluctantly pulling away from you, everyone in the crowd following your brothers’ suite, smiling as they brushed away the wetness welling in their own eyes from listening to your vows. 

“Well, I’d ask if anyone needs to object before we continue, but I think it’s pretty darn clear that these two idiots love each other more than life itself, so I’m just gonna skip that part.” Charlie joked, making you and Javi smirk in agreement. “Alright Miss Olivia, it’s your time to shine, do you have the rings?” He asked, your niece’s face lighting up in excitement as she nodded her head frantically, shooting up out of her seat to dash towards the two of you, carefully holding the ring box like a newborn baby bird in her hands. 

Daintily, she passed the box off to her dad before scampering over to both you and Javi, wrapping her arms around your waists to pull you close in a hug, smiling up at each of you with her toothy, goofy grin. 

“I love you Auntie Bear and Uncle Javi.” Olivia beamed, giggling in pure bliss and joy before skipping back to her seat among the guests, the both of your hearts bursting at the seams with the chores of “awhhhhs” coming from the crowd for your adorable niece. 

“Someone’s trying to get an extra slice of cake tonight huh, Miss Olivia?” David teased, your guests erupting with laughter at her not so innocent shrug to her Uncle’s question, knowing damn well she was just as much of a ham as you. “I trusted the six year old to carry these, can I trust you two not to drop them, or do you need to cry some more first?” 

“Oh shut up, David.” You sighed, rolling your eyes at your brother as you and Javi each took the rings to give one another, carefully holding the shiny gold bands in your hands, counting down the moments until you finally got to say “I do”. 

“Alright, ladies first, so I guess that means you, Cubby. You ready?” 

“I don’t think I’ve ever been more ready for anything, you dingus, get this show on the road.” 

“Alright, here goes nothin’. This is the part I actually had to practice, so God forbid I mess this one up huh? Do you,” David giggled, saying your real name instead of the nicknames you had lovingly bestowed upon you for as long as you could remember, “Take Javi to be your husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, as long as you both shall live?” 

“I do.” 

Carefully slipping the gold band onto Javi’s finger, you could feel your heart bursting in anticipation, biting down on your lip to try and contain your excitement, slowly pulling your hand away to let your brothers finish the second half of the exchange. 

“And do you, Javier Peña, take our sister,” Charlie and David snickered again, having to say your full name for a second time, “to be your wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, as long as you both shall live?” 

“I do.” 

Gently grabbing your palm and gliding the glistening ring onto your finger, Javi rubbed his thumb over the pair of bands nestled together, forever making a home on your hand, his eyes welling at the sight of the sign that you would always be his. 

Intertwining your fingers together and hands clasped in front of you, you and Javi were radiating with joy, anxiously staring back and forth between each other and your brothers for them to finally say those magic words you had been waiting to hear since the moment you had met all that time ago. 

“Well ladies and gentleman… by the power vested in us, the internet and the state of Texas, it’s our honor to introduce to you the new Mr. and Mrs. Peña.” Charlie grinned at you, trying not to burst into laughter at the near panicked look on your faces, not having heard the next set of words you were more than dying to hear. 

“Well go on, you lovebirds, kiss already!” David snickered, shrugging at the pair of you with a grin on his face. 

Before he could barely finish his sentence, Javi’s hands were cupping your face, palms cradling your jaw as he brought his mouth to yours, fireworks exploding in your stomach at the electric intensity of his kiss, so soft and tender, yet so desperate and needy, like it was the first time his lips had ever met yours, and that he never, ever wanted to let them go. 

Your hands shot up to grab his face too, a smile creeping across your mouth with your lips still pressed to his as Javi dipped you down, sliding his hand down the small of your back to hold you before pulling you back up, his lips still locked on yours like glue. 

In that moment, it seemed like time stood still, that nothing else in the world existed besides the two of you- nothing else mattered besides the fact that you were here, kissing the man that you loved more than anything in the world. 

The man that you finally got to call your husband. 

Over the cheers, whistling, and hollering from your friends and family, the both of you were finally snapped back to reality as David gave you a little nudge and a look that screamed “gross, save it for the honeymoon.” 

Reluctantly breaking from your kiss, you grabbed Javi’s hand in yours, holding your fists in the air and cheering in excitement right alongside your guests before heading back up the aisle, your cheeks hurting from how hard they were smiling. So lost in your excitement, you turned your head as you felt Javi stop, tugging you back to the middle of the aisle, smirking as he pulled you close to his chest, whispering in your ear. 

“Not so fast, Mrs. Peña. C’mere.” Grabbing your face and wrapping his arm around your waist, Javi was kissing you again, swinging you down in another dip that had you erupting in giggles and your guests cheering even louder, Javi’s smooth moves soliciting a loud “OW OW” most definitely from Steve. 

“God, I love you.” You smirked as Javi pulled you back up to stand before the two of you were nearly skipping down the rest of the aisle in bliss, racing to the back of the crowd where you had entered the ceremony, turning the corner behind the house where no one could see you, not even bothering to look over your shoulder to see who’d followed you before your lips were crashing into each others again. 

This one was nowhere near as tame as the kisses you had just shared moments ago- this kiss was a tangled mess of tongues and teeth, Javi’s hands creeping dangerously close to the curve of your ass as you tugged at the lapels of his suit jacket, your mouths moving in a messy dance as you whispered muffled and muted words between your kisses. 

“Fuck, my beautiful wife. God, I’m so fucking lucky. I love you so much.” 

“I love you so much too, Javi, I’m so-” 

“Jesus Christ, it’s been 30 seconds and y’all can’t keep your hands to yourselves? C’mon, now. Y’all gotta whole week and a half to do this without having to subject the rest of us to it, Mr. and Mrs. Peña.” Steve laughed, making the both of you gasp as he slapped Javi on the back, immediately making your cheeks flush pink in embarrassment and Javi groan in annoyance at his best man’s timely (or untimely) disruption. 

“Steve, c’mon like you didn’t have your hands all over me after we got married.” Connie sighed, now smacking the back of her own husband’s head, making him wince in pain. “Congratulations, you two. We’re so happy for you.” 

“Thanks, Connie.” You and Javi smiled, Javi still keeping his hand wrapped around your waist as the rest of your wedding party started making their way back up the aisle to greet you, too.

“Also having gotten married before, you’re gonna thank me later as I make you go find your brothers to sign your marriage license somewhere that has a little peace and quiet before you get none the rest of the night. Why don’t you guys head inside and I’ll cover for you for a little, okay?” 

“You’re the best, Connie, thanks.” Javi grinned, pulling you away towards the house, quietly sneaking in through the front door to wait for your brothers, Javi looking both ways around the seemingly empty house before pulling you close again. 

“Javi, Charlie and David are gonna be in here any minute, and they’re gonna give us just as much shit as Steve, if not more.” You giggled, gazing up into Javi’s eyes, still awestruck and giddy. 

“I know. Just one more kiss, mi esposa (my wife).” Javi smirked, tilting his head down to press his lips to yours, his thumb tracing soft circles on your cheek as the rest of his fingers cradled your jaw, tilting your eyes up towards him. “Fuck, you’re finally my wife. I don’t think I’ll ever get over that.” 

“Good thing we have the rest of our lives to get used to it, huh?” 

People weren’t kidding when they said that your wedding would be a blur- From the moment the ceremony ended, it felt like everything was moving in fast and slow motion at the same time, being pulled in every direction to talk with family members, take pictures, and make sure that things were running smoothly. As much as you and Javi were both trying to soak in every moment of your special day together, it was safe to say the two of you were feeling a little overwhelmed by the time you had gotten to dinner, and couldn’t have been more thankful to have a moment to finally sit down. 

More importantly, you were so glad that you had gotten to the point where you had a drink, some delicious food in your stomach, and the best part of the night ahead of you- dancing. 

The sun was beginning to set on the horizon of the Peña ranch as dinner was coming to a close, the clanging of forks and knives against dinner plates slowly shifting to chatter and conversation that was filling the space of the white tent that had been propped up in the backyard for your reception. 

You weren’t really sure what to expect when you had decided on a backyard wedding, but with the absolutely stunning work your mom, Connie, sister in law, and Javi’s aunt’s had put together for you, they had made a white tent feel like something out of a fairytale. String lights and greenery were strung across above you, long tables decorated in candles and beautiful garlands of eucalypts, sprinkled white and pink roses from Lucia’s garden, along with cute, colorful vintage cups that the women had collected or thrifted for your guests to use. Everything about your setup felt magical, and with the sun sinking and fading into dusk, the glow and twinkles of the lights illuminating your space only made it feel that much more incredible. 

As the two of you sat at your head table, bellies full and hearts happy, feeling a little tipsy from the extra strong margaritas Javi’s cousin seemed to be making, you were a little worried as what looked like a more than just tipsy Steve approached you, slapping a stack of index cards in front of you. 

“Listen… I’m like the perfect level of drunk to give this best man speech. Any less drunk and I’ll be too fuckin’ nervous to do it, and any more drunk I’m not gonna be able to remember what I’m supposed to say. Y’all good to keep this movin’ so you can do your first dance and then we can get this party started?” 

“Jesus Christ, Murph…” Javi sighed, laughing at his friend, now sassily crossing his arms over his chest at Javi. “This speech better be good.” 

“It’s good, and Connie approved, so you know I won’t say any dumb shit. Well, not if we don’t start soon and I keep drinking more.” Steve paused, letting out a low burp, rubbing his stomach and grimacing at the two of you, snorting at him. 

“Take it away, Shakespeare.” You smiled, gesturing your arm out to the dance floor in front of the guests sitting at their tables, chatting away. You couldn’t help but laugh as Steve confidently made his way to the front of the crowd, Connie silently mouthing “I’m so sorry”  from across the room, pointing at her husband, now ready to take the stage. 

“Hey y’all,” Steve started, bellowing his voice loud enough to catch everyone’s attention, making them pause their chit chat and focus their attention on him. “I’m Steve Murphy. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Javi’s best man. Normally it’s customary for a guy like me to come up and say a few words about the bride and groom, so lucky for y’all, I’m your guy tonight. You’re welcome, Jav.” 

The crowd laughed as Javi sighed, rolling his eyes at Steve and shaking in his head in fear of what was to come, sliding your hand over to rest on his thigh, giving your now husband a little squeeze of reassurance to have some faith in his friend. 

“I have had the pleasure of knowing Javi for a long time now. It’s been, what, 17 years now, Jav?” Steve asked, turning back to look for confirmation. 

“It’s been too long.” Javi replied, shaking his head, his witty response only making your friends and family laugh more. 

“Whatever, you grumpy old bastard. Anyways, I first met Javi when I found out that I would be his partner down in Colombia working for the DEA. Not gonna lie, when I first met him, while I’ve never admitted this until now, I was pretty intimidated by the guy. He was cool, smart, respected, even though his jeans were way too fuckin’ tight.” Steve teased, winking at Javi, making you snicker from the few pictures you had seen from back in the day when Javi was in Colombia, knowing exactly what Steve meant. 

“I’ll spare you all the details of our time down there, but through all of our trials and tribulations, despite our differences and disagreements, the one thing I always admired about Javi is that he really cared about what he did. No matter what, he always cared about trying to do the right thing for the people he cared most about. Now, believe me, if you would have asked me all those years ago if I would have ever pictured Javi here today, gettin’ married, buildin’ a house and talkin’ about startin’ a family? Well shit, I prolly woulda told you that you were bat shit crazy. But, if there’s anyone in the world who deserves every ounce of all that domestic, lovely dovey bliss, it’s this man right here.” Steve smiled softly, pointing back to Javi who couldn’t help but let his heart fill with warmth at the sentiment from his friend, your hand rubbing up and down Javi’s leg, his grasping over yours to hold it tight. 

“Javi, I know you’ll never believe me when I tell you this, but I’m real proud of ya, man. And I hope you know how goddamn lucky you are that this beautiful woman has agreed to spend the rest of her life with your grumpy ass. Speaking of which…” Steve smirked, turing back to look at you with a goofy grin, making you raise an eyebrow at whatever stupid comment was bound to come out of his mouth. 

“Mrs. Peña. I never thought I’d live to see the day Javi was so in love. When he called me a few weeks after the two of you first met, and was all jazzed and excited to tell me about this beautiful girl he had started datin’ and how happy he was, I just about damn near fell down. He never said it on that phone call, but I knew that this sorry shit was absolutely head over heels in love with you.” 

That comment had you giggling at Javi’s blushing face, his cheeks turning pink at Steve’s story, even though he knew damn well it was the truth. 

“I couldn’t think of anyone who would be more perfect for Javi if I tried. When I first met you and saw how sickeningly cute y’all were together, God’s honest truth, my first question I asked Javi was when he was plannin’ on buyin’ a ring. Glad to see that sometimes he’ll take my advice. Sweetheart, I can’t thank you enough for being so good to my best friend right there. I hope he knows how lucky he is to have someone like you.” 

Grabbing your hand, Javi interlocked his fingers with your underneath the table, softly smiling at you and gently nodding his head in agreement. 

“I also need to thank you that he’s finally got someone else to worry about him instead of me. One less thing off my back. No offense, Jav. Alright, well, y’all have probably heard enough of me yappin’, and y’all are anything like me, you’re ready for more drinkin’ and dancin’. To Mr. and Mrs. Peña-” Steve paused, grabbing the nearest drink he could find and raising it up in the air, prompting the rest of your guests to do the same. “Wishin’ you two lovebirds a lifetime of happiness. I love you guys. Cheers!” 

Over the applause and cheerful shouting, Steve rushed his way back over to the two of you, slotting himself in between your seats so his head poked out between yours, wrapping his arms around both your shoulders and pulling you in for a hug. 

“Nice work, Murph.” Javi smiled, patting Steve on the back, laughing to himself at how genuinely thoughtful Steve’s speech had turned out to be. 

“Thanks, Steve. Your speech was really great. How much did Connie have to edit out?” You snickered, looking back between him and Javi. 

“... Let’s just say I left out the part about y’all horny bastards needin’ to be better about lockin’ your doors when other people are around.” Steve chuckled, shaking both of you in his grap, You and Javi’s eyes sheepishly darting to the ground in embarrassment. 

“Fuck off, Murph.” 

“Love you too, Jav.” 

With one last pat on the back for each of you, before you could say anything else, Steve was already halfway across the tent back to the bar to congratulate himself for getting through his speech without any major slip ups or major scoldings from Connie after he returned back to his table. 

“Thank God for Connie.” You grimaced, laughing at Javi whose face was buried in his palm, shaking his head at his friend, wondering why he would expect any less from him. “...He’s not wrong, though.” 

“I’m triple checking that I lock all the doors later so I don’t give him any more reasons to be right…” Javi sighed, giving you a little nudge while the hand that had been holding yours suddenly let go, resting on your thigh over your dress, giving it a long squeeze, making your heart race in anticipation, his eyes locking with yours, telling you everything you needed to know.  

Some way, some how, Javi was going to find a way to fuck you before the night was done. 

“Javi…” You whispered, heat creeping through your cheeks, trying your best to keep from blushing as you locked eyes with him, his devilish grin and lust pooling in the dark brown of his eyes entrancing you in a way that had butterflies swirling in your core and ache rapidly beginning to grow between your legs. 

“Si, Mi esposa?” (Yes, my wife?), Javi smirked back, running his hand further up your thigh and closer to your core as his other hand came up to cup your face, thumb tracing back and forth across your skin, toying just enough to tug at the corner of your lip. 

While you had gotten a little bit of alone time with Javi today, the way that the both of you had been absolutely insatiable for each other after seeing each other in your wedding attire, let alone the fact that you were now actually married? You and Javi were both dying to try and find a second to yourselves without interruption, especially from Steve. 

So caught up in awe of each other, you and Javi hadn’t even noticed your DJ, standing next to your table, quietly clearing his throat to try and get your attention. 

“Hey, uh- Mr. and Mrs. Peña?” He interjected, loud enough to finally snap you and Javi out of the horny stare down you had entered, “Are um- are you two ready for the first dance?” 

“Oh, um- yeah, y-yeah, sorry about that.” Javi grumbled, the two of you quickly trying to snap out of the thick heat of sexual tension that had been growing between you, both readjusting yourselves in your seats as you looked up sheepishly at the DJ,  “Sorry, what did you say?” 

“I asked if you two were ready to do your first dance? If you um, if you need some more time I can-” 

“No, we’re okay, thanks.” You grimaced, trying to keep from giggling and blushing as you looked over at Javi and then back at your DJ. “You ready to dance, Mr. Peña?” 

“Never been more ready, Mrs. Peña.” Javi replied, grabbing your hand as the two of you stood up, out of your seats walking to the edge of the dance floor while your DJ headed back to his booth. 

“Hello everyone! We’re going to get ready to start our first dance with the newlyweds, so if you could please direct your attention to the dance floor, we’re about to get started!” 

Before you could even take a step out onto the floor, the cheering and clinking of knives against glasses was erupting amongst the crowd, Javi happily taking the opportunity to grab you by the waist and pull you in for a long, deep kiss, making you giggle against his lips still pressed to yours as he dipped you down, before pulling you back against his chest. 

“Show off.” You snickered, raising an eyebrow at him as he finally pulled away from your kiss, staring down at you with a goofy grin. 

“Better get used to it, Mrs. Peña. I’ve got the whole rest of our lives to keep showing you off.” Javi smirked, shooting you a wink before tugging you out into the center of the dance floor, patiently waiting for your song to start as you draped one arm around his neck, Javi snaked his hand around your waist, and the pair of your other hands joined clasped at your side. 

It was then that the melodic violin entrance to “At Last” by Etta James began to play, Javi smiling down softly at your agreed upon choice for your first dance song after lots of debate and discussion the past few months. 

At last 

My love has come along

My lonely days are over

And life is like a song

As the music began to play, you and Javi began to sway back and forth to the syrupy symphony of the song, your heart bursting and stomach filling with the same butterflies it had the first time you had met Javi all those months ago. 

“I’m glad we picked this one.” Javi smiled, the two of you circling your way around the dance floor, eyes locked on each other.  

“Me too. It always makes me think of making breakfast with you on the weekend and all the little moments I love with you.” You grinned back, letting go of Javi’s hand to drape both arms over his shoulder and around his neck. 

“It makes me think of spilling that entire bowl of pancake batter all over Bear and then having to chase him around the house to get him in the tub.” Javi sighed, rolling his eyes as he laughed to himself, tightening his grip around your waist to pull you closer. 

I found a dream that I could speak to

A dream that I can call my own 

I found a thrill to press my cheek to

A thrill that I have never known 

“Me too. God, who would have thought that a year ago we’d be having our first dance at our wedding talking about spilling pancake batter all over our dog.” You giggled, leaning to rest your head against Javi’s chest. 

“I did.” 

Looking up at Javi, you could feel your cheeks warming, staring at his big brown eyes welling with tears, trying your best to now hold back the wetness pooling under your lashes. 

“Osita, I swear, from the moment I saw you smile at me, I knew that you were the only woman in the world I ever wanted. I knew you were the one I wanted my forever with. I’ll never get over the fact that I’m the luckiest man alive. I love you so fucking much.” Javi choked back, letting one of his hands slide up your face, gently cupping your cheek as he tilted his head in for a soft kiss on your lips before pulling away for another one on your forehead. 

You smiled, you smiled 

Oh and then the spell was cast

And here we are in Heaven 

As the song began to slow, the sweet melody winding down to its close, Javi lifted up his arm to let you twirl beneath him before spinning you back into his chest and wrapping his arm around your waist to catch you as he dipped you down again, your mouths meeting in a long, tender kiss, electricity sparking between your lips and butterflies swirling in your stomach. 

For you are mine 

At last 

“I love you too, Javier Peña.” 

Over the applause of your guests, you could hear an obnoxiously loud “OW OW” from the crowd, coming from a now even more intoxicated Steve, making you and Javi laugh at his reaction, swiftly followed by Connie’s sharp jab to his ribs to get him to settle down. 

“Alright ladies and gents,” The DJ spoke over the rumble of voices at the dinner tables, “Let’s have one more big round of applause for our newlyweds!” 

As the crowd began to clap again, and Steve, threatened by another blow to his side, cheering at an appropriate volume, the DJ spoke again with the announcement you had been patiently waiting for since the ceremony finished. 

“Alright everyone, with our first dance done, it’s time for the best part of the night, the dance floor is officially open! Let’s party!” 

As the blaring intro to “Jump Around” began to blast to your speakers, your friends and family rushed to the dance floor, you let out a squeal of surprise as Javi snatched you up around your middle, lifting you up to spin you around in a fit of giggles. 

“Vamos a bilar, mi esposa.”  (Let’s dance, wife) 

The rest of the night was the best kind of celebration that you could have asked for- the joy of being surrounded by your friends and family, dancing the night away to your favorite songs, and drinking one too many margaritas with your husband was everything you could have asked for and more on your wedding night. 

It was no shock to you that your family had no problem making absolute fools of themselves out on the dance floor, happily (and drunkenly) flailing along to every single song, although your brothers’ and Steve’s enthusiastic sing-along to “Baby Got Back” was impressive, to say the least. 

And while you and Javi had expected your family to act a fool, what neither of you had expected was how excited Chucho was to bust out dance moves of his own, taking everyone by surprise as he joined all your co-workers and Javi’s co-workers (who had quickly become best friends on the dance floor), to shake his way through “Wannabe” by the Spice Girls, leaving you in hysterics, and Javi in stunned embarrassment at his dad’s antics. 

As the evening began to creep later and later into the hours of the night, a very sleepy Olivia approached you and Javi on the dance floor, gently tugging at your dress and his pants for attention with puppy dog eyes plastered on her face that almost gave Javi’s a run for his money. 

“Auntie Bear and Uncle Javi, can I pick a song? Pleaseeeeeee?” Olivia begged, pouting her bottom lip at the two of you, absolutely melting your hearts in an instant. 

“Of course, mi amor.” Javi smiled, caving immediately as he crouched down to her level, her face lighting up in delight at her uncle’s response, coming close to whisper in his ear. 

If you couldn’t have already been more in love with your husband, watching him listen intently to what your niece had to say, nodding in agreement before scoping her up to rest on his hip, you were practically in a puddle now. 

“Me and Miss Olivia are gonna go make a song request.” 

“But Auntie Bear, you have to let me dance with Uncle Javi first, okay?” Olivia quickly added, very adamantly. 

“Of course, lil Miss. Have fun, you two.” You smirked as Javi and Olivia made their way over to the DJ, watching Olivia’s face light up instantly as the DJ agreed to her request, Javi carrying Olivia out to the middle of the dance floor and setting her down on the ground as the end of the song slowly began to fade into your niece’s song choice. 

With her love for the movie, you shouldn’t have been surprised at all that her pick was “Can You Feel the Love Tonight” from the Lion King Soundtrack, but even though you weren’t shocked at her choice, there was nothing that going to be able to prepare you for the gut wrenching cuteness that was your now husband, dancing with your niece. 

It had already gotten to the point in the night that Javi’s suit jacket and tie were long gone, 3 buttons undone and sleeves rolled up to his forearms, and the once neat curls of his dark hair now messily sweeping his forehead from your night of dancing, and if the sight of just how goddamn handsome Javi looked, on top of the fact he was now officially your husband, paired with the sight of him slow dancing to the Lion King with Olivia? 

Your ovaries were just about shot to hell. 

As the song played and Javi and Oliva spun around the dance floor in a fit of smiles and giggles, you couldn’t help but wish with every bone in your body that it was your daughter that Javi was dancing with, nearly falling to your knees the thought of making him a dad, on top of being your husband. And if that wasn’t enough, the two of you were finally married, and that meant half of your bargain to start trying for kids was complete- and with the other half being your house finally finishing with construction which was almost close to being done as well, you were so close to start trying for a baby of your own, you could almost taste it. 

And that? That drove you crazy enough to feel like you were going to combust. 

So stuck in your daydream, you didn’t even notice Olivia running up to you, now tugging at your dress again, letting out a little sleepy yawn as she tried to get your attention. 

“Okay Auntie Bear, you can dance with Uncle Javi now. Thanks for letting me pick a song.” Olivia smiled as you sunk down to meet her, wrapping her in a hug. 

“Of course, Olivia. Thank you for being the best flower girl today. I love you, cutie patootie. Alright, I’m gonna go dance with Uncle Javi now, okay?” 

“I love you too, Auntie Bear. I think Uncle Javi misses you, he wouldn’t stop looking at you the whole time we were dancing. I think he wants to kiss you again, but that’s gross. Yuck.” Oliva grimaced, making you giggle as she stuck out her tongue before watching her scamper away back to her sisters and the Murphy girls to dance some more. 

As you turned back, bracing yourself to stand back up, you were greeted with Javi’s large palm held out in front of you, pulling you up to greet his handsome grin while you looked up at him. 

“I’ve been told I have permission to come dance with you now.” 

“It did take some persuading, I told her I’d save an extra piece of cake for her if she let me go dance with you.” Javi chuckled, pulling you back out onto the dance floor, slowly swaying back and forth to the beat. 

“Watching you two out there is dangerous.” You smirked, raising an eyebrow at Javi as he cocked his head in confusion. 

“What do you mean, hermosa?” 

“I mean,” You paused, standing up a little bit taller, throwing one arm over Javi’s shoulder, running your hand through the hairs at the nape of his neck to whisper in his ear, “Watching the two of you made me think about how much I wanna make you a dad. And now that we’re married and the house is almost done, we actually get to start trying soon.” 

It took everything in Javi not to let out an audible moan, letting out a gulp and scrunching his eyes shut for a moment to try and maintain his composure at what you had just said to him, his grip around your waist immediately tightening and eyes darkening as he opened them, staring down at you, absolutely awestruck. 

“Fuck me.” He muttered to himself, almost shaking his head in disbelief that after all of the time you had spent talking about wanting kids and nights you’ve had wishing there hadn’t been any birth control to keep you from having them were now an almost tangible reality, “Is that what you want, mi esposa? My wife wants me to give her a baby?” 

Javi’s voice rasped in your ear, sending shivers down your spine, your stomach flipping in arousal at the hot breath of his words against your skin, knowing what had started as a sweet and simple moment of Javi dancing with Olivia had quickly shifted into a desperate want, no, need, for him to give you what you were asking for. 

As the music slowly faded into the next song, bodies shuffling and dancing to the more upbeat tune that had followed Olivia’s choice, the both of your figures stood frozen on the dance floor in a silent exchange of racing hearts and yearning glances before Javi took your hand in his. 

“Follow me.” 

In an instant, Javi was tugging you across the dance floor, the two of you dodging and weaving your way through your guests with polite smiles and happy waves, doing everything you could to try and sneak away as discreetly as possible in hopes that everyone would be too preoccupied (or too drunk) to realize that you were gone. 

But at this point, you really didn’t care whether anyone noticed if you were gone or not. Truth be told, the only thing you cared about was finally getting to fuck your husband. 

Finally making it through the worst of the maze of people, you and Javi had made your way to the back porch, quietly peeking your heads through the door, checking to make sure the coast was clear before hastily slipping inside, gently shutting the door behind you before sneaking down the hall to Javi’s room, thanking whatever higher power had let the two of you get to his bedroom in peace. 

From the moment Javi had shut the door behind him, you were all over each other in an instant, hands roaming across each other’s bodies as you stumbled until the back of your legs hit the mattress, flopping down onto the bed, Javi’s body caging yours in his frame. Your lips crashed together in a hungry clash, tongues, teeth and moans melting together between your mouths as Javi hiked up the skirt of your dress, running his hands along your thighs, squeezing the soft flesh in his firm grasp before his fingers crept towards your aching core, ghosting over the white, lacy fabric covering your cunt, already soaking with arousal. 

“Fuck, you’re so wet, hermosa. My wife’s pretty little pussy all wet for me, huh?” Javi rasped, the pads of his fingers pressing more pressure over your covered clit, making you whimper in delight. 

“It’s all yours, Javi. Yours forever, baby.” You moaned, your breath hitching in the back of your throat as Javi’s fingers dipped under the waistband of your underwear, collecting the slick pooling around your folds before plunging his two fingers inside your heat and thumbing at your sensitive bundle of nerves, pure bliss running through your veins at his touch. 

Your response had Javi practically growling, a low groan rumbling in his chest as he looked down to see the golden and diamond bands glistening on your finger, awestruck at the beautifully blissed out mess you were already becoming as his fingers curled, prodding at the spongy spot inside you that he knew drove you wild. 

“You’re so fucking perfect, Osita. My beautiful wife. Fuck- I can’t believe your mine. I love you so fucking much.” Javi groaned, his words muffled between the hot, wet kisses he kept planting on your lips, feeling your cunt beginning to clench around his digits. 

“I l-love- fuck- I love you too, Javi.” You whimpered, the all too familiar tingle at the base of your spine beginning to build as Javi’s fingers pulsed in and out of your heat and thumb circled your throbbing clit, knowing with how worked up you were and how good he felt, it wouldn’t take much more before you were coming undone around his hand. 

“I know you’re close, baby. Let go, hermosa. Cum for me so I can fuck my wife and show her how much I love her.” 

“F-Fuckfuckfuck Javi. Don’t stop, baby, don’t s-sto-ahhhhhhhhh.” 

With his thumb circling faster and harder around your sensitive bundle of nerves, and fingers plunging in and out of your weeping hole, it wasn’t long before you could feel that all too familiar tingle spreading throughout your body, your orgasm flooding through every inch of you as you came around his fingers, soaking his hand. 

“That’s it, Osita. That’s my good girl. My good wife.” Javi groaned, making you whimper as he withdrew his fingers from your dripping heat, admiring the slick and shiny mess you had made around his fingers, entranced by the way your arousal had coated his wedding band as he brought his hand to his mouth, sucking his fingers clean before beginning to work at his belt. “You taste so fucking sweet, baby.” 

You sat back up, looking over your heaving chest to see Javi shuffling his pants and boxers down his thighs, leaving them to pool around his ankles, revealing his cock, already so painfully hard and weeping with precum from his tip. Reaching down to run his fingers through your folds again, he collected your slick on his hand before rubbing it up and down his length, stroking himself to line up with your entrance. 

“F-fuck, let me feel you baby, p-please.” You whined, reaching up to grab fistfuls of Javi’s shirt, tugging him down to kiss you and lay his body on top of yours. 

“Jesus fucking Christ…” Javi moaned, slowly filling you up with his cock inch by inch until he had bottomed out against your cervix, letting you adjust to the fullness as he relished in the wet and warmth of your pussy gripping around him like a vice. 

“M-move, Javi, please, baby.” The sweet sting and stretch of Javi’s length inside you already wanting to make your eyes roll to the back of your head. 

Javi began to languidly thrust himself in and out of your heat, dragging his cock almost painfully slowly against your velvety walls, cursing under his breath at the feeling of his balls beginning to tighten in his stomach, knowing there was no way he was going to be able to last as long as he would have wanted to in the moment. 

“Javiiiii” You whined, your arms wrapping around back, nails pressing into his shoulders as his cock hit the spot inside you that lit you ablaze. His hand snaked between your bodies, reaching down to rub your clit, still slow, taking his time with each graze of his fingertips as his pace held deep and steady. Every thrust in and out of his hips had you wrecked as he filled you so fully and intensely, moaning his name over and over while he grasped the meat of your thighs, pressing your knees against your chest to stretch you open even further.  

“God you’re so beautiful. My beautiful fucking wife. Gonna be such a beautiful mom for our kids.” Javi grunted, this thrusts becoming faster and sloppier as he let the reality of his marriage and actual attempts to start trying for a family burn a hole in the forefront of his mind, igniting something even feral within him, knowing he was one step closer to finally giving you and him what you both wanted more than anything. 

For Javi to get you pregnant.

The last sentence made your breath hitch in the back of your throat, whimpering at the notion that because you were finally married, there wasn’t much stopping you from tossing out your birth control tomorrow and trying to get pregnant by the end of the month. 

“J-Javi-” You whined, trying to form any sort of coherent thought as your brain short circuited from the pure bliss and heart racing thoughts running through your brain. 

“What, Osita?”  

“I-I want you- oh shit- to fuck a baby into me, Javi. I wanna throw out the rest of my birth control- I don’t care if the house- Jesus- isn’t finished. I wanna stop taking it tomorrow. I w-want you to- fuck- fill me up and get me pregnant.” 

You could practically feel the weight of Javi’s jaw dropping to the floor, eyes bulging out of his skull, and heart beating out of his chest, so shocked, he stopped himself mid thrust, just to make sure he had heard you correctly. 

“Osita- baby, are you- holy fuck- baby, are you serious?” 

You nodded your head frantically, grabbing the collar of his shirt to pull him in for an electric kiss before leaning back to whisper in his ear, your voice sultry and low. 

“I need my husband to fuck a baby into me. Please. Fuck a baby into me, Javi.” 

If Javi didn’t have his arms already braced on the bed, there’s no way in hell he wouldn’t have fallen over in pure delight at your request, his stomach now churning with the wildest mix of excitement, lust and pride, spreading up through his chest and across his face, the brown of his eyes darkening and awestruck smile widening. 

“You want me to fuck a baby into you, Hermosa?” Javi asked, almost rhetorically, a devilish grin spreading between his cheeks as he began to pound into you again, not even giving you a chance to respond, knowing damn well what your answer was.  

If his thrusts weren’t already frantically rushed and sloppy, they most definitely were now, Javi practically on the brink of his own high just from the thought of getting to fuck you, knowing there was a real, true chance of getting you pregnant, trying to fight with everything in him to keep from busting right then, needing to make sure that you came again before he did. 

The lewd noises of your moans, wetness of Javi’s cock sliding in and out of you, and his hips snapping against yours coated the walls of the room, the both of you having no regard for anyone who may have been close enough to hear you, so caught up in the moment, that at this point, you couldn’t have cared less if anyone caught the both of you. 

“Answer me, baby. Mierda- You want me to fuck a baby into you, huh? Want me to fucking fill you up and get you pregnant? Show everyone you’re mine with our baby growing inside you?” Javi grunted through gritted teeth, pounding into your g-spot with blinding force, frantically circling your clit as he felt your cunt begin to clench tighter and tighter around his cock, knowing you just needed a little bit more before he had you coming undone. 

“Y-yes- fuckfuckfuck- I need you to, Javi, p-please baby, please, please, pleaaahhhhhhh-” 

Just like that, you could feel yourself gushing around Javi’s cock as you came, your orgasm hitting you like a tidal wave, crashing through every inch of your body, euphoria flooding through your veins, screaming his name while he fucked you through your high, desperately chasing his own. 

“I’ll give it to you baby, I- fuck me- I’ll give you everything you want. I’ll give you as many babies as you want. I’ll give you a family, I’ll give you my heart, my soul, my everything, my- oh fuck!” 

Javi’s hips stuttered, forcing a low groan to rumble in his throat as he came, the hot ropes of his spend coating your walls, making sure to milk himself of every last drop inside you, still pulsing and thrusting inside you, ensuring that nothing went to waste. 

Slumping his body on top of yours, your chests rose and fell in sync, trying your best to catch your breaths as you came down from your highs, your mouths meeting in a sloppy kiss to try and ground  you back to reality. 

“Holy fuck…” You whispered through your labored pants, laughing to yourself from the pure bliss of what had just happened, staring up at Javi with a radiant grin, brushing the sweat-dampened curls from his forehead. 

Javi hissed as he carefully pulled out, leaning back enough to see the smile on your face, gently cupping your cheek as he looked down at you with a goofy grin of his own. 

“Osita… Were you being- baby, were you serious about what you said?” 

“Jav, I don’t think I’ve ever been more serious about anything in my entire life. Is-is that okay with you?” You asked, biting down on your lip. 

“Is that okay with me?” He asked, almost mockingly, chucking to himself as he shook his head in disbelief, “We can really throw it away tomorrow?” 

“Yup.” 

“And you won’t bring it with you on the honeymoon?” 

“Nope.” You replied, popping the “p” at the end of the word. 

“And there’s- holy fuck- there’s a chance you could actually get pregnant soon?” Javi asked, his face glowing brighter and brighter with each question he asked. 

“Mmmhhmmm. Well, I mean, it might not happen right away but- Ahhhh Javi!” You giggled as your husband aggressively peppered ticklish kisses across your entire face, making you squeal and squirm in delight. 

“Fuck, I love you so much. Thank you.” Javi smiled, tears welling in his eyes as he looked down at you. 

“Jav, baby, don’t cry! Why are you crying, you dork?” 

“You’ve given me everything I’ve ever wanted. You married me, we’re gonna have a family, it’s just- fuck, I promise, that I wanna spend the rest of my life until the day I die showing you how thankful I am that you chose me. That you gave me all the things I stopped thinking I deserved. I love you so much, it fucking hurts, Osita. Thank you for choosing me.” 

Sitting up, you threw your arms around Javi, pulling him close to you in the tightest hug you could muster, stroking the hair at the nape of his neck, feeling the weight of his body melt into yours, your bodies intertangled as one. 

“Javi, you’re the only one it ever could be. Te amo más de lo que las palabras pueden expresar. (I love you more than words can say).” 

“Hey! Lovebirds! Are y’all in here?” 

Over the music and chatter of the party outside, you and Javi had been completely oblivious to the all too familiar southern twang of Steve’s voice behind the bedroom door, gently knocking from the outside after being sent on a mission to find where in the world the two of you had been for nearly a half hour. 

“Hello? Mr. and Mrs. Peña?” Steve rapped again, getting nothing in response but silence. Steve shrugged, drunk enough to have no fear to pound on the door repeatedly until the two of you showed up, now reaching down at the doorknob and giving it a jiggle. 

Steve was shocked to find that he could turn the handle, writing off the fact that they two of you would be in a room with an unlocked door after the 10 pounds of shit he had given Javi, and with his inhibitions severely lowered, he had  no problem cranking the knob and pushing the bedroom door wide open. 

“Hello? Earth to Javi and Mrs. Peña, are y’all in here or not because I- Oh Jesus Christ!” Steve shrieked, opening up the door to see you and Javi, your dress still hoisted up to your waist, and Javi’s bare ass completely on display, making the both of you scream just as loud in surprise at your unwanted visitor. 

“Murphy! Get the fuck out!” Javi snarled, quickly scrambling to try and pull your dress back down and his pants back up. 

“Jesus Fuckin’ Christ!” Steve yelled, immediately bringing his hand to his face to cover up his eyes, trying to drunkenly stumble as quickly as he could back out of the room, but, because of his intoxicated state and self-imposed lack of vision, Steve found himself colliding head first with the wall, knocking himself to the ground before crawling across the floor like a frazzled toddler, kicking the door closed behind him. 

For as devastatingly embarrassed as you were by the whole debacle, you couldn’t help but cackle at the impeccable comedic timing of the whole thing, snickering to yourself as Javi finished buckling back up his pants and helping you up to stand before storming to the door, opening it to find Steve still sprawled on the floor in an a hysteric fit. 

“Are you fucking serious, Murph?” Javi growled, completely unamused. 

“God, I shoulda kept my bit that Connie cut in my speech. Y’all do know that doors have locks, right? Might be helpful if y’all learned how to use ‘em. Just food for thought.” Steve giggled, watching both of your faces grow beet red in embarrassment and at a loss for words. 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Javi asked, pinching the arch of his nose between his fingers, shaking his head in frustration, looking down the hallway to make sure that Steve was the only presence you needed to worry about. 

“I’m tryin’ to save your asses before someone else worse than me walks in on the two of you gettin’ it on. Y’all do realize you’ve been gone for almost 45 minutes right? Being the- oh shit-” Steve paused, letting out a giant burp,” ‘cuse me, being the good Best Man I am, I decided to try and find you two idiots before people started askin’ too many questions. So, you’re welcome.” Steve grunted, pushing himself up to stand, cocking his head at the both of, hands on his hips, trying to prove his point. “Also, do you two anything else besides fuc-” 

“Steve! Jesus Christ, will you shut the fuck up!” Javi groaned, staring down at the floor, taking a deep breath to compose himself before he decided to kick Steve right back down to the ground again. 

“...It’s really been 45 minutes?” You grimaced, looking back between Steve and Javi, shrugging at your husband that any longer, your mom would have been on a search party for you, and it would have been your whole family at Javi’s bedroom door instead of just Steve. 

“Yeah, and I’m the first to come lookin’ after ya, so again, you’re welcome. Jesus, Javi, you can really last for 45 fuckin minutes? How the-” 

“Murphy!” 

“Sorry…” 

“Fuck me….” 

“Think you and your wife already took care of that one…” Steve muttered under his breath, trying not to laugh.

“I swear to God, Steve…” 

“Okay, I’m done! I’m done! Swear!” Steve held up his hands in defense, taking a step back away from Javi.   

“Will you please just give us a minute, Murph?” Javi sighed, running his hand through his hair, trying with every bone in his body to keep his patience with his drunken friend. 

“Fine, fine, fine. 1 minute. I’m counting. Use your time wisely and appropriately, you sickos.” Steve snickered, disappearing down the hallway, only to peek his head back out around the corner. “And Jav?”

“What, Murph?” 

“Your fly’s undone.”

As you and Javi sheepishly made your way back out to the backyard, you couldn't have been more relieved to see that at this point, anyone still left at your reception was far too drunk to care that you had been missing, seeing that almost all of your guests were out on the dance floor, partying away without a care in the world, or any inkling of what you and Javi had been up to. 

“Longer than a minute, but beggars can’t be choosers I guess.” Steve chuckled, creeping up behind you with two drinks in hand, passing them both off to you and Javi. “Here. Figured I owe ya a drink. These are on me.” 

“We paid for the bar, Murph.” 

“Alright, well I guess these ones are on you, Grumpy Pants.”  Steve grumbled mockingly, holding up his hands in defense, trying not to stumble over his own two feet as he made his way back to the dance floor. 

“Remind me again why I picked him to be my best man?” Javi laughed, taking a sip of his drink, the both of you snickering as you watched Steve whip out some questionable dance moves to “Don’t Stop Me Now” by Queen blaring in the background and Connie shake her head at her husband. 

“Because you love him. Don’t get me wrong, he’s an idiot, but he’s a good guy.” You smiled, giving Javi a little nudge, resting your head on his shoulder as you looked out at the dance floor. “Hey-” You paused, holding up your glass and raising it to Javi’s. “Cheers.” 

“Cheers to what, Osita?” Javi asked, wrapping his arm around you, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead as he brought his glass next to yours. 

“Cheers to us. I love you so much, Javier Peña, it makes me sick. Sicker than all this tequila is gonna make me tomorrow after I keep drinking it the rest of the night.” 

The two of you snorted, goofily clinking your glasses and taking a hefty sip of your drinks as you looked out on the dance floor, your hearts overflowing with love and joy to know that you were surrounded by all of the people in the world you cared about most, even the ones that couldn’t be physically with you, to celebrate the biggest day of your life and the start of your new forever. 

“Cheers, Hermosa. I love you so goddamn much. Maybe the hangover will help distract the nerves on the flight tomorrow.” Javi smirked, taking another sip of his drink as he shook you playfully in his grasp, your faces both lighting up as you remembered that tomorrow, you be in the Bahamas for the next 10 days, where the only thing you needed to worry about was where you wanted to lay on the beach, what drink you wanted in your hand, and now, seeing how quickly Javi could get you pregnant. 

“Oh shut up.” You sighed, giving Javi a little slap to the chest before taking another sip of your drink, looking up at Javi with heavy lashes, batting your eyes at him. “You just have to remind me that I have to do some unpacking before we leave tomorrow.” 

“Unpacking?” Javi asked, tilting his head in confusion at you, the gears in his brain turning as you bit down on your lip, raising your eyebrow at him, waiting for him to piece together your clue. “Oh. Oh.” 

Javi’s eyes went wide as he remembered what you meant, heart racing in anticipation, never imagining before today that he would have been so excited to actively throw away birth control to try and have a kid.

“Can we throw it away tonight?” Javi pleaded, his puppy dog eyes in full effect. 

“I’m not sure what difference tonight and tomorrow morning is gonna make, but sure. Happy wedding present.” You giggled, pressing up onto your tiptoes to plant a long, hot kiss. 

“Best fucking gift I could ask for besides the fact I finally get to call you my wife.” 

As the end of the song slowly faded out, “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back)” began to play next in the background, your face lighting up in excitement and Javi’s eyes rolling, hearing the song that had been most likely the biggest controversy of your entire wedding planning process now bumping through the speakers, followed by the cheers and hollers of your guests. 

“I told you people would want to hear this song.” You said smugly, crossing your arms over your chest, popping your hip at Javi as you sassed him, making him shake his head at your theatrics. 

“It doesn’t stop it from being a stupidly annoying song.” 

“A stupidly annoying song that people love. A stupidly annoying song that your wife loves.” You teased. “Whaddya say, Peña, can you stand this unbearably stupid song to go dance with me? 

“I’d dance to this song with you a million times if it means I get to dance with you.” 

Grabbing Javi by the hand, you tugged him out to the dance floor in a fit of giggles and smiles, jumping along and dancing to the beat song after song the rest of the night with your friends, family and husband. 

You couldn't help but catch yourself stopping now and again to smile to yourself to take everything in, feeling like you needed to pinch yourself to make sure this was all really real. Just over a year ago, your life felt like it had hit an all time low. You had moved halfway across the country to try and run from your pain, desperate to find any way to bring yourself any ounce of peace in your ocean of hurt. It felt like fate had forsaken you for the worst, kicking you while you were down, and leaving destruction in its wake. 

But never in a million years would you have believed that fate would have sent you with a one way ticket to Laredo, Texas, and that trip would bring so much more than just the glimmer of hope you longed for. It had brought you peace, comfort, the acceptance you weren’t sure you would have ever allowed yourself to feel. Laredo had brought you everything you never expected, and all of the things you never thought you deserved. 

It brought you Javi- the man who single handedly changed your life for the better, loving you unconditionally for every part of your being and piecing back together the parts of your heart you had left broken.

It brought you the man you now got to call your husband. 

Fate and life have funny ways of working together to bring you the things you need the most when you least expect them. And today, as you got to marry the love of your life and your very best friend, you knew you’d be forever thankful that fate stepped in when you needed it most. 

La vida es graciosa, no lo crees? (Life is funny, isn’t it?)

@chaotic-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @messinadresa @milly-louise @jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled @pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @nastiasnow @vee-bees-blog @hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @mandoisapunk @msmorningstaarr @amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @picketniffler @burningnerdchild @copperhalfcent @theoraekenslover @bloodyinspirationaldemon @vee-bees-blog @amyispxnk @samgirl4life @pigeonmama @pedr0swh0r3 @survivingandenduring

[tokoyamisstuff]

Halloween with the Hellsing Characters

Inspired by an Anon ask. Can be read both romantic and platonic. No warnings.

Featuring: Anderson, Alucard, Walter, The Captain, Seras (+ Pip), Integra

Anderson:

Sorry, but this man is an absolute killjoy about every non-christian holiday. However in the end he's a big softie and can't deny you or the children any wish. Will fold like a lawn chair eventually.

Even then he'll complain. A lot. It's heretic to celebrate this, it promotes gluttony that, blah blah blah...

Man will get a heart attack seeing his sweet lil' babies dressed up as vampires and the likes, it's hilarious just observing him tryna keep his cool for their sake. You'll coerce him into going as Frankenstein but he refuses to acknowledge the similarities.

He definetly has a sweet tooth and can be bribed into having a good time though, especially after he discovers his bayonetts are working neatly for cutting pumpkins.

Alucard:

This is one silly, goofy man and you can't tell me otherwise. You think this is below him? Nah, he'll take any chance of entertainment he can get. There's nothing off limits or too cringe for him.

I mean hello?! It's the only time of the year he can literally be himself and people will think it's just a decent costume or special effects. Probably shows up headless or turns into a bat, shows people his 'puppies' or whatever.

Will absolutely overdo it, though. Terrifies the local children (and adults alike), the police will probably get involved at some point and Integra has to bail you guys out.

Ordinary events like these actually help him feel a little more human again, so he can't wait until next year.

Walter:

Not a fan of anything that had been introduced by the US, including this tradition. It wasn't part of his childhood either so he's not really eager to committ. Yet in the ends he loves to serve, especially people he's fond of, and he's very adaptable too.

Would like a more classy and mature approach, like going to some kind of masquerade. Could also see him hosting his own gathering.

There's literally nothing he can't do himself, from selfmade treats to a puppet show using his wires. Would absolutely love to do a partner-costume with you and can sew anything you want!

The Captain:

In all honesty this man would rather just spend the evening in peace and silence at home with you.

Is very passive about basically anything, but that means you can do whatever you want to him and he won't complain. Dress him up as something cute, chances are high he'll secretly love it. Doesn't even try to be scary, he just is.

Mostly just quietly looms in the background but he really is happy, he could watch you do stuff you like forever.

Seras and Pip:

They're the most hyped about it like?? omg yess thank you for asking

Wants to do it all: making sweets, decorating, trick or treat, visit a haunted house, go to a party. They have a whole childhood to make up for.

They're definetly pranksters and will wreak havoc in the entire neighbourhood. Act like Pip is some kind of glove puppet, use Seras' powers to entertain the children or make it rain candy, etc...

Despite being a literal median herself Seras is still soo jittery, will jump and scream at anything really. The fact that Pip tries to scare her doesn't make it any better. They're mostly giggling and chanting, though.

Integra:

To be honest it's been a while since this woman has actually enjoyed herself. It'll take a while to convince her but then she'll spare no expenses to assure the best experience ever. Private jet to all the best places it is.

No costume for her, she's intimidating enough. Gets in trouble for carrying real weapons too.

A lil' paranoid, always expecting the worst like an enemy to hide amongst the crowd. What better moment for a monster to strike would there be than during Halloween?

Calls it childish and unnecesssary a lot, but damn did she have fun (will rather drop dead than admit it).

[squoxle]

✏ TNAIT: Pilot l.at fanfic

➢ pairing: none | wc: 400 | cw: profanity, jokes of death | plot: intro

Not to sound like an overdramatic, hormonal teenager, but my life is so over.

Everything was perfect. I had my friends, my prestige, and my parents' respect. I was on the path to obtaining my degree and enjoying every minute of my college years. But since the beginning of this stupid semester, it has been one thing after another.

Initially, I spent hours studying my ass off, but outside of that I never had time for anything else...

Wake up. Study. Practice. Go home. Study some more. Go to sleep.

Fucking Groundhog Day...every day...

So to keep me sane, I started to do whatever I wanted and my coursework was put on the back burner. Sure, I've been able to actually hang out with my friends, but my grades look like shit.

And midterm reports will be uploaded today. My parents are gonna fucking bury me alive.

Introducing the small friend group that will likely attend my funeral.

[ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ɪɴᴛʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴛɪᴏɴ]

ɴᴀᴍᴇ: Abigail Amelia Grant (or just Abby)

ᴀɢᴇ: 19...until August

ᴀᴘᴘᴇᴀʀᴀɴᴄᴇ: Beautiful, blonde, perfect body

ᴘᴇʀꜱᴏɴᴀʟɪᴛʏ: Sometimes toxic, mostly sweet, lowkey in love with Jake -- a.k.a. your number 1 best friend

ꜱᴛᴀᴛᴜꜱ: Horny...

[ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ɪɴᴛʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴛɪᴏɴ]

ɴᴀᴍᴇ: Xoey (can't remember her middle name) García

ᴀɢᴇ: 20

ᴀᴘᴘᴇᴀʀᴀɴᴄᴇ: Long chocolate brown hair with bleached bangs, big brown eyes with a mole directly under the right one

ᴘᴇʀꜱᴏɴᴀʟɪᴛʏ: Fiesty, can come off as bitchy, but that's just the way she is -- she also had a threesome with Jake.

ꜱᴛᴀᴛᴜꜱ: I honestly don't know...she's kinda hard to read.

[ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ɪɴᴛʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴛɪᴏɴ]

ɴᴀᴍᴇ: Nova Diamond Moore

ᴀɢᴇ: 18

ᴀᴘᴘᴇᴀʀᴀɴᴄᴇ: Curly hair, face like a baby (also her nickname), and thick in the humblest way

ᴘᴇʀꜱᴏɴᴀʟɪᴛʏ: Sweet as hell and usually pretty silly, until it's time to be serious of course

ꜱᴛᴀᴛᴜꜱ: Hungry -- she asked if we could go out for ice cream later...too bad I have a family dinner to attend.

[ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ɪɴᴛʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴛɪᴏɴ]

ɴᴀᴍᴇ: Janice Fatima Jones (sometimes we call her JJ)

ᴀɢᴇ: 21

ᴀᴘᴘᴇᴀʀᴀɴᴄᴇ: Shoulder-length wavy black hair, can't really distinguish her ethnicity...but I know her dad is white

ᴘᴇʀꜱᴏɴᴀʟɪᴛʏ: Can be uncomfortably formal at times, but she's usually pretty chill. Don't expect to find her at a party though, her dad is kinda the dean of this university.

ꜱᴛᴀᴛᴜꜱ: Neutral -- that's what she said when I asked lol

[ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ɪɴᴛʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴛɪᴏɴ]

ɴᴀᴍᴇ: Sim Jaeyun (we just call him Jake)

ᴀɢᴇ: 21 until November

ᴀᴘᴘᴇᴀʀᴀɴᴄᴇ: Cute, sexy puppy -- Abby's words, not mine.

ᴘᴇʀꜱᴏɴᴀʟɪᴛʏ: Goofy, sweet, and UGH! I can't even say it -- Abby's words, not mine.

ꜱᴛᴀᴛᴜꜱ: Missing me -- Abby's words, not mine.

Well...hopefully whatever happens tonight doesn't actually end my life...

(I know it's a day early, but I couldn't wait any longer :\)

Thanks for reading this little intro to my series. [Series Masterlist]

Click this link to go to my main masterlist and stay tuned for the next episodes.

CURRENT TAGLIST: @chlorinecake @addictedtohobi @nikisdubblchococake @laylasbunbunny @urfavberry @antonitty @billiondollarworth @meowbini

[cyborgpuppyofficial]

so why do you like Scourge the Hedgehog? What got you interested in him?

Yo my first ask!!!! Thank you so much for asking me a question, and to anybody else, I'll always be happy to respond to questions you may have about me or my oc's. Anyways, this is gonna be kinda long. ^^'

Long Explanation: So I've always liked Scourge design wise, ever since I was pretty little. Maybe about seven was when I saw him for the first time? I used to mistake him for Manic, but eventually learned the difference. When I learnt he was an Evil Counterpart of Sonic, I was hooked on him. I've always been a fan of AU's, and the concept has been something I loved to write for a very long time. Since I was young, I didn't understand his character, and wrote him in a dumb way when I was younger. Usually as a generic bad boy antagonist in Sonic High School AU's and stuff...

Later on during 2019, I was bored and decided to read more of the Archie Comics. That's when I learnt his backstory, and I became HOOKED on his universe, and the other Anti Counterparts. I began doing research, and I ended up starting a Gacha Life Shorts Show called The Misadventures Of Moebius on Tik Tok. It's still currently going, and I genuinely have fun writing it. It's mostly just me expanding on Anti Mobius, since the Archie Comics came to an end, and we never got to see many things from the universe. Many of the early episodes are inaccurate to my thoughts on most of the characters nowadays, and how they act. But to be fair, it's my first ever series, and I was only about 12 when I began making it for the first time. And at that point, I didn't even finish reading Archie like a dummy. I basically wanted to make silly shorts with some goofy characters I liked.

AUGH SO CRINGE AUGHHH. TmT

I appreciate his cool design, and the many writing opportunities he holds. It's easy to see Scourge as all evil, and write him as a cool villain. This is because of his cocky and rebellious demeanor. But it's also just as easy to see him as a misunderstood and not all evil character, which is how I personally see him. I think the idea of him and his father would've been cool to see more of, since obviously Scourge's home life effected the way he turned out growing up. And that if he's with the right people, he could've been just like Sonic! Kind of like an inverse on what he says to Sonic during one of their battles. In other people's AU's he's still a bad guy, but in my own I redeemed him. The nuanced way that people can see his character is a reason why I love him so much!

Plus, I like how he isn't super crazy like other Archie Sonic Villain's. Sometimes he's just kind of a dickbag, and I always enjoy someone who can be threatening, but also silly. I don't love everything about his character of course, he has some things that I try to forget about with his writing. But that's basically the case for every single character I like from anything ever. XD

I love this little shit so much. XD

TLDR:I've liked the green goober for a while now, but only since 2019 have I been more public about my love for this dummy. I love the idea of his universe, I like the many paths writers can take his character, and I just think his personality is really fun.

If you're interested, bellow is a work in progress on my Headcannon/AU Scourge that I use in my TMOM Episodes and videos! I hope to draw him, and the other cannon cast more often. And maybe interacting with my Anti Counterparts I made, or original characters from his universe I've built up for five years now. But I'm starting out by just making him a ref page. My next post will hopefully be him, or my next video. ^w^

I'm making this design for a video! And also just for fun! I can't wait to share the final with ya'll! X3

[daydreamgoddess14]

So Long... As You Love Me?

Ted Lasso / Rebecca Welton

No. 14 - When Rebecca falls hard and tells him (or Ted figures it out a different way), Ted doesn't want to ruin their friendship. Rebecca suffers, Ted maintains he's not in love until there's a moment.

A 3.11/2 retelling - Rebecca does have a truthbomb but Ted is still reeling from his mom’s visit - should he stay or should he go?

~~~~~~

"Do you know what time it is?" Rebecca asked confidently. 

"Uh, 9:30. Or half nine as you folks say over here for some goofy-ass reason." 

"Mm-hmm. That's just to annoy Americans." She admitted. 

"Ah.Yeah." 

"No, this is that time of year when I come down here and reveal something to you." 

"Oh, snap! That's right. Okay. Well, here we go. Uh, you know what? Maybe I should guess this year. No, no, no, that's silly. Yeah. No, you just go ahead and tell me. Go on, let 'er rip." Ted pretended to brace himself. 

"I… shit. I knew I shouldn't have listened to Sassy."

"What's Sassy Smurf got to do with your truthbomb, boss?"

"Girl talk. She told me why she really turned you down when you asked her out. She said it was because you liked me, which I told her was absurd of course, but then she got it into her head that I like you which I again, told her was ridiculous but… well…" Rebecca had near paced a hole in the floor, "I think she's right. No. No, I know she's right. I like you, Ted. I love you, actually… That's it. That's my truthbomb."

"Well holy smokes, boss. That's uh, that's pretty unexpected."

"Yes, indeed. Surprise!" She waved her jazz hands with a self-conscious smile.

"I guess I actually have one for you too, boss… I'm gonna go home at the end of the season."

"For a holiday? Because the end of the season is next week, Ted?"

"For good."

"Oh." She breathed, and then remembered her own yet to be acknowledged truthbomb, "Oh ." Shame and anxiety washed over her, she felt exposed and unmoored. She fumbled for the door, brushing past him.

"Wait, we should talk about what you said?" He tried to stop her, 

"No no. No need, Ted. No need at all. Fully umm… respect your decision. You have my total support." She stuttered numbly, barely registering her own words. 

"Boss… it ain't that I don't -, I mean, I don't want you to think that I don't have feelings for you. Heck in another world, Rebecca I would never have waited this long. I'm sorry, I just -, I can't. I can't do this right now." The rejection took Rebecca's breath away. She'd sensed it was coming in his change of subject, but to hear his resignation at the same time? To be rejected as a friend as well as a life partner? The thought of not having him in her life at all hurt like no pain she'd experienced before. More than the pain caused by her father, by Rupert. None of it compared to the intensity of the pain of losing her soulmate. The love of her life that she'd waited so long for. Who didn't feel the same way. It was too much. The fences go back under construction, higher and stronger than ever before and Rebecca protects herself, she puts on her game face.

"Totally agree, Ted. No idea what I was thinking. Just being silly old Rebecca. I'll just go and get on with the day." She pushed past him and through the locker room without even glancing at Will. 

 

They spend the remainder of the week in a not-quite-talking limbo. Deliberately keeping each other at arms length - Ted unable to move past his mother's declaration that Henry needs him, and Rebecca unwilling to discuss both her own truthbomb, and the impact of Ted's. Preparations for the final game go on as planned, the team also dealing with the stress of losing Ted and Beard regardless of the final results on Sunday. Uncertainty reigns on Nelson Road. It sets Rebecca on edge and unnerves her in a way she hasn't felt since she spent every waking hour treading on eggshells around Rupert. She feels the same trepidation. It eats into her sleeping pattern, her appetite and her day to day conduct. She stays late at night and arrives early in the morning. She avoids Higgins and Keeley's desperation to discuss Ted's departure and buries her head fully in the sandy soil underneath the beautifully maintained Nelson Road pitch. In her periphery, she can see that Ted battles his own demons. She can see that he's struggling with his decision to leave, torn between Henry in Kansas and his found family in Richmond. The team alternate between teasing him for leaving them, and actively berating him for it, their emotions uncontrolled and overwhelming. For those who don't have families locally with them, or even in the same country, he's a father figure - the closest thing they have to a parent. They're still so young really. The week progresses and Rebecca moves from replacement discussions to considering selling the club. Although the rejection by Ted burns, she quickly realises that she'd still follow him anywhere if he'd only say the word. But he won't. He can't, and she can't force his hand - she would never take a father away from his son. Following lunch with her mother, she tries one last attempt. Goes to the mattresses as they say. Offers of obscene amounts of money, schools for Henry, anything she can think of to sway him. She doesn't speak again of her love though. It's too much, if she starts she's afraid she'll never stop. She keeps it strictly professional, if that's what he wants, that's what he'll get. 

 

The morning of the match dawns. They're literally an hour from taking to the pitch when Roy asks to join the Diamond Dogs. The words ring in Ted's ears, 

" Change isn't about trying to be perfect."

"Perfection sucks. Perfect is boring."

"Oi, what the fuck is up with you? And don't say it's the leaving blues, you've been weird all week." Roy asked Ted. 

"Rebecca's in love with me." All eyes turn to him. 

"What. The. Fuck?" Roy recovers first. 

"How long did you sit on that little nugget?" Trent asked. 

"And you didn't tell moi?" Beard looks visibly hurt.

"She told me last week, she told me and my only response was to tell her I was leaving."

"Ouch,"

"Brutal,"

"You're a twat. You really are, an incredible person like that tells you she loves you and you tell her you've booked a flight home?" Roy is first to Rebecca's defence. 

"I've seen you do dumb shit, Ted, but that really takes top prize, man." 

"How did she take it?" Nate asked. 

"About as well as you'd expect," he admits, sadly. "I think I might be an idiot?" There are hefty nods of agreement all round. "I think I might not want to leave?"

"Oh thank god!" Nate breathes. 

"It's not too late to back out, buddy." Beard reassures him. 

"What about Henry?"

"Speaking from personal experience, I know my daughter is far happier and more settled now that I'm honest and open about who I am. Living a lie will only cause pain for everyone involved." 

"Thanks Trent, I appreciate your honesty. Rebecca offered to help me relocate Henry and Michelle if that's what I wanted. I turned her down."

"Sounds like you need to have a talk to Michelle and figure out how to move forward as a family unit rather than a married couple. You just accepted the terms of the divorce because it was easier than the pain of dealing with it. Time to put on your big boy pants, Coach." Beard told him. 

"We need to deal with this match first, fellas. Let's go. Dogs dismissed."

 

The match is hard work. With fraught emotions, the Greyhounds are down 2 - 0 at halftime. Rebecca slipped into the locker room during Ted's talk. 

"We don't wanna know the future. No, no, we wanna be here right now. And look, I-I know we're down a couple goals. But I'm telling you, man, if y'all play hard, play smart, play together and just, you know... Just do what y'all do, and we'll go out with the peace of mind knowing we did our best. Right? That we tried. Yeah?" The players murmur arpund him. 

"All right. Anybody else have something to say?" 

"Coach?"

"Yeah, Sam, what you got?" The young man stood and retrieved a small piece of yellow paper from behind his Nigeria team photo. Jamie was right behind him, taking a piece out from the book he'd supposedly thrown away.  Isaac's was battered - kept in the band of his captain's armband, the whole team stood and added their contribution, some embracing each other as they did so. From the doorway beside Trent, Rebecca watched with tears in her eyes. With a shrug of acknowledgement, the team set to work assembling the jigsaw. They stood back slightly puzzled as they appeared to find one piece missing.

"Ahem." Rebecca cleared her throat. From her bag, she pulled out a little green army figure, 

"Oh!" Jamie grinned, tucked between the plasticky legs was a scrap of yellow paper. Rebecca freed it and added it to the missing space. 

"And there it is. Number four. Yeah? All right, let's bring it in." Rebecca stepped forward, tucked in between Isaac and Colin, the Captain giving her hand a little squeeze as she added it to the pile. "I know folks like to say, "There's no place like home." That's true, you know. Man, there ain't a whole lot of places like AFC Richmond either. Captain?" Rebecca felt Isaac shudder beside her, 

"Richmond on three. One, two, three…" "Richmond!" The team shouted in unison. They dispersed and filtered out in small groups. As the crowd cleared, Ted caught Rebecca's eye. She gave him a sad smile and followed Jamie out. He's still left dumbstruck as Beard hustles him back out to the dugout. Seeing her with a piece of the sign, tucked in the legs of her little green soldier figurine no less, it was like he'd been struck by lightning. He's still a little dazed out on the pitch. By the time Isaac is stepping up to take a penalty, he knows . It's an awakening - he suddenly sees and feels everything as it should be. You can hear a pin drop in the stadium but from high in the stands, he hears one clear roar for the Richmond captain. 

"C'mon Isaaaaaaaaaaac!!" She bellows. He tries to imagine what other gaffers, coaches and owners might think of a total novice stepping up to take his first penalty at such a crucial moment in such a crucial game, but Rebecca shows nothing but love and support for her boys - as usual. His heart bursts. There's no place like home - it's true. And he knows where his home is. He hears it in her voice. The rest of the game is, admittedly, a bit of a blur. It's only when they're 2 - 2 and looking for one final piece of magic that he drags himself back into the game. With some obscure gesticulating to Jamie and Sam, they come up with a plan. Sam's goal is beautiful and even over the sound of 70,000 people, he's certain he can still hear Rebecca. When the final whistle blows, the crowd pour onto the pitch. The result is in from Manchester - they've taken the league, but no one seems to care. He pushes through the crowd, accepting handshakes and shoulder grabs on the way up the steps. Up and up into the nosebleeds, all the way to the owner's box where Rebecca is flanked by Keeley and Sassy.

"We didn't win the whole fucking thing, boss. I'm so sorry." She shakes her head, tears streaming down her cheeks, 

"It's OK, Ted. This is perfect, this is enough."

"No, it ain't. I made you a promise. If it's OK with you, I'd like to rescind my resignation? I need a do-over next year. I made a promise to the woman I love, and I can't let her down." Keeley gasps beside her, the cameras have picked up on Ted and though it's without sound, the images are being broadcast on live TV. She drops back down into her seat as Leslie pulls Ted up and over the little wall that separates the box from the main grandstand. Ted thanks Sassy with a little nod as she moves to let him take her seat. "I'm sorry, Becca. I'm so sorry it took me so long to figure it out. There's no place like home, right? This is my home. It's you, it's always been you." On the pitch, the team are still huddling together, but they're looking to the big screens. Rebecca can only nod as she drags Ted closer and presses her face into the crook of his neck. When she finally pulls away, the team and remaining crowd are hushed - waiting, just waiting… he cups her cheek and she smiles, the camera capturing her serene smile as Ted finally leans in to kiss her. Nelson Road is rapture.

 

FIN.

[otakween]

Digimon Data Squad (Savers) - Episode 40

Woohoo! 40 episodes 🥳 I see the light at the end of the tunnel now.

Once again, this episode was boring in the first half and then got exciting towards the end. I just kinda zone out during the battle sequences and this was mostly that.

Also, I unfortunately was spoiled for the reveal of Yggdrasil's identity by MAL, but I'm not mad cuz I probably should have figured that one out myself 😅

Notes:

Craniummon totally looks like he was inspired by Skeletor from He-Man crossed with Zurg from Toy Story. I like his cool Q-tip sword

(Are those pig tails?)

Gotsumon is back for comic relief reasons. Honestly, most of the scenes with him weren't that funny but I liked his voice. (I noticed he used the uber polite "watakushi" pronoun)

I laughed like an 8 year old when Masaru confused the Japanese word for "den" with "butt." I think what sold the joke was everyone's understated reaction and correcting him.

There doesn't seem to be any acknowledgment in this version of Digimon that digimon were created by humans. Like the digimon want humans dead and kinda see them as like colonizers or something, but surely "digital monsters" would not even exist if not for humans, the inventors of computers? I'm not saying digimon can't be against their own maker, but it feels like they're acting like the whole digital world is completely organic and unrelated to humans or something. Like, can we get an origins lore dump for the Savers AU please?

Why does Masaru's dad have a robot voice filter in the dub? I guess they wanted him to sound more ~digital~

Wait so...Masaru's dad was Yggdrasil all along? There wasn't a Yggdrasil before he showed up? What about Yggdrasil in the X-Evolution movie? I need answers!

Masaru punching a sword was pretty silly (the fact that it worked so well was even sillier).

Very fun seeing all the royal knights finally assemble. It's kinda like Frontier DLC or something haha. UlforceVeedramon is a new one. I like the colors and the cape but the head design is underwhelming.

I like how we get exactly one (1) memory between little Masaru and his dad before the reveal. That felt kinda weak. I guess they didn't do a lot of planning ahead when writing this show because they could have built this up better with more flashbacks in previous episodes. Betrayals are less devastating when you barely know someone. All that being said, the memory was pretty adorable and so was baby!Masaru's high pitched voice.

Masaru's dad is wearing a weird full body leotard thing. Looks goofy as heck.

What in the deus ex machina was that final scene!? A pretty crazy looking digimon saved them, but it kind of went by too quick for me to absorb the design. I'll wait til next episode to get into it. The out of nowhere of it all was unintentionally funny though.

[prismuffin]

hi there! i hope youre doing alright,, happy late new years‼️ i just found your blog and i think your pretty cool :)

can i request an ethan hunt x male!reader where the reader is also an agent?

— reader has loved ethan and worked with him for a really long time,, watched his relationships come and go

— reader’s feelings are pretty obvious to the rest of the team but ethan hasnt shown any interest so reader hasnt made any moves

— until the reader almost dies on a mission and ethan realizes he actually loves reader back

shdghsgdgd you can change it up ofc, it’s just an idea that’s been stuck in my head for a bit 💀👍

A/n: YESSSS MORE M:I REQUESTSSSS

Can't Lose You

Ethan Hunt x agent!male!reader

( summary: Your near death experience made Ethan realize he can’t live without you )

warnings?: swearing, injury, blood, guns, shooting, typical M:I violence

!-!more under the cut!-!

You jolted as you felt a hand hit your back, hearing a chuckle escape from the culprit. “Jumpy Y/n?” You sighed and turned, seeing Ethan Hunt, one of your best friends. You've worked with him for years, watched as he's met many women and even seeing him get engaged. It hurt to watch seeing as you'd gained feelings for him right before the announcement but you pushed your silly feelings aside to support your long time friend. Speaking of said friend, you sighed, giving Ethan a playful glare, “you just caught me by surprise, I thought everyone had already left.” You said, turning back around to zip up the duffle bag filled with supplies for the upcoming mission. “They did, we’re all waiting on you ya know.” Ethan crossed his arms as you slung the bag over your shoulder. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to delay us, I just had to grab some extra equipment Benji requested.” You shrugged, and looked at Ethan. Your eyes searched over his face, admiring him like you always did. He was just so handsome it was hard not to stare sometimes. Ethan’s eyes squinted for a moment as he noticed you lost in thought and you quickly moved on before he could question you. “Anyways I have it all now,” you pat the duffle that hung by your hip, “so let’s not take any longer yeah?” Ethan nodded and the both of you left to regroup with the team.

"I've got eyes on the target." Benji's voice rang through your ears. "Where." Ethan's voice cut in, it always caught you off guard how serious this goofy man became when on missions, it's a little scary to see him in this element but you can't get enough of it. At least you know he's taking this seriously. "Uhh he's closest to Y/n, guy with the gray jacket and orange hat." Your eyes scanned the subway station you were currently in until you caught sight of someone with that description. You started walking through the sea of people towards the bright orange cap. "Y/n, I'm on my way." You nodded before realizing he couldn't exactly see you, "alright." You tailed the man quietly, hoping not to catch his eye while watching him though life just didn't seem to wanna work out for you today. He'd suddenly stopped which confused you, walking to a nearby bench, you leaned against it and waited for his next move. "Targets stopped...he looks like he's texting somebody but I don't wanna get too close." You said before hearing straight static as a reply. "Guys?" You lifted yourself to a standing position as your target had started to move again.

You pressed a button on your comms to restart them, hoping it was just a problem on your end. Suddenly, your target shot forward in a sprint, scaring some civilians in the station. You wasted no time running after the guy, "Hostiles moving! And quick! If you guys can hear me he's heading towards the east wing!" You slightly yelled as you chased him, turning every corner he does. He left the station and made a turn to an abandoned building across the street. Eventually the chase declined when you both hit a staircase, you pulled out a gun and yelled for him to stop. When he obviously didn't you fired a shot, but missed, and the guy kept running.

The chase ended with you both on a rooftop, you tackled him just as he broke through the door of the roof. A floor fight ensued as he tried to force you off of him, scratches and punches flew from both parties and eventually he’d landed a clean hit to your jaw. The impact made you disoriented long enough for him to roll you off of him. The sound of your gun flinging off of your body had caught his attention and your eyes grew as you realized where he was looking. He dove for the weapon and you grabbed his leg making him fall last minute, though he was still closer to the gun than you’ll ever be. He huffed as he grabbed it, aiming it down towards you and you jumped forward in a last effort to get the weapon away from him.

BANG!

Ethan breathed heavily as he ran through the train station. The east wing, that’s where Benji had last seen you running to before the cams went dark, only a few moments after comms did. He knew something was wrong when all he heard was static. He cursed under his breath as he turned a corner that only lead outside. There was this staircase or a dead end so he’d assumed you’d run outside. “C’mon Y/n…where are you..” “Ethan?!” Benji’s voice cut in his ear, it genuinely startled him but he was quick to refocus. “Benji??” “Ethan! Thank god! What happened? Y/n’s comms went dark and soon after I told you their location so did cams! The hell is going on?!” “Someone must have hacked our system.” He heard Benji sigh and mumble something about this being because Y/n grabbed the wrong transmitter. “Benji? Are your camera working again?” “Uhh yeah, they’re back up why?” “I need you to locate Y/n for me, I think he left the station but his comms are still offline.” He spoke quickly as the thought of actually losing you to a mission entered his mind. "Uhh yeah gimme a second." Ethan's eyes scanned the surroundings as he waited for Benji but the usually patient man was being tested. "Benji!" "I'm looking! Hold on geez there's like a hundred cameras in this city, this is practically impossi- oh shit- Ethan! To your right!! He's on the roof!" Ethan immediately took off in said direction as Benji continued to talk. "He looks unconscious...oh god..." "Benji, search for the target see if he got far." Benji stuttered out an ok as Ethan launched himself up the stairs. Benji said you were unconscious? His heart was beating rapidly in his chest as he bursted through the door of the roof, quickly seeing your body on the ground.

He slid to your side and watched as you groaned. You were alive, good. "Y/n? Y/n what happened." You coughed and that's when he noticed the blood that was pouring out of your upper chest. A bullet wound sat near your shoulder blade, you were attempting to put pressure on it with one of your hands. Ethan ripped the bottom of your shirt, a small apology escaping his lips as he moved your hands out of the way to put pressure on the wound himself. "Hey...you're gonna be alright ok?" He winced as he heard your jagged breathing. "Ethan I can't find our target anywhere." "It's fine! I'm calling off the mission, Y/n's hurt, call for extraction." "Copy, calling for extraction." You coughed, blood spilling from your lips as you struggled to breath. Darkness filled your vision as you began to lose consciousness. "Y/n, keep your eyes open ok? Help's on the way." You felt Ethans hand rest on your face, your own blood smeared on you, though in this moment you could care less. You smiled, staring at Ethan "So pretty.." "Y/n? Hey Y/n! No! Keep your eyes open don't you dare close them! Y/n!"

Beep!

..

Beep!

..

Beep!

..

You felt heavy. The beeping of some sort of machine was the only thing tying you to consciousness. You could open your eyes, but they felt too heavy. Take things slow- you reminded yourself as you breathe, it was easier than before but the pain was still there.

"Ethan..."

A voice! Finally something else to focus on other than that incessant beeping. "...almost lost him.." You heard someone mumble, they were closer than the other voice. You recognized it, it was Ethan's, but the others was deeper, Luther maybe? You heard some shuffling before anyone spoke again.

"You care about him."

"Of course."

A beat of silence followed. "He cares about you too...more than you know." Ethan didn't seem to wanna respond to that one, only a sigh fell from one of their mouths though you weren't sure who's. A sniffle was heard next, "Ethan..." "It's like it's all coming down on me." "What is?" "Everything...it's like I opened my eyes for the first time Luther." So your hunch was correct, it was Luther and Ethan. "I always knew I cared for him a little more than others but I thought it was just because I knew him for longer...but I think it's more than that Luther." He inhaled sharply, "I think...I think I'm in love with him." You couldn't believe what you were hearing. The thought of Ethan sitting by your side for however long you've been knocked out was enough to get your heart beating faster, which you'd heard. Your heart monitor picked up, startling both boys as the consistent sound suddenly changed. "Shit is he alright?" "Go get a doctor Luther!" You heard footsteps exit the room quickly, the booming sound of them getting quieter and quieter the farther he got. "C'mon Y/n, the doctor said you should be stable what's going on.." You heard Ethan mutter.

You felt like you were fighting an invisible force that was attempting to keep you down, you needed to wake up, to tell him you felt the same. Years and years of feelings that you pushed aside were coming out, your heart monitor beeped rapidly and your leg twitched. Ethan noticed it, immediately focusing on the area before it clicked for him. "Y/n are you trying to-? C'mon you got this, you can wake up." Validation from him was always what you were looking for even if it was in the slightest of ways. You puffed out a breath of air, your eyes clenching tightly before you released them. They fluttered open but immediately shut again, the light in the room was too much for you. A shadow blocked your vision, dimming the light from your eyelids. A breathy laugh could be heard from Ethan as you tried to open your eyes again. Instead of blinding hospital lights you were met with Ethan's face, his head being backlit by the ceiling lights. "Hey..." You croaked out, your throat felt dry and your voice sounded course. Ethan laughed, a smile on his lips and tears in his eyes, "Hey...you're awake." You nodded and he placed a hand on your cheek, staring into your half-lidded eyes. You smiled and leaned into his touch but your smile dropped soon after. "Did you,,,mean what you said?" You spoke slowly, looking away from the male above you and towards the chair he must have been previously sat in. "What? When?" "Just a minute ago...I think,,,I think you were with Luther.." You looked at Ethan again, noticing the small amount of blush that happened to find it's way to his face. You were sure it'd be much clearer if his face wasn't so dimmed because of the lights. "You heard that?" He breathed out quickly, his eyebrows raising in surprise. You nodded, feeling his fingers twitch on your cheek. "Oh." That was all that had left his mouth and you took a moment to breathe before speaking once more. "I feel the same ya know...I have for a while but I-" You cut yourself off, deciding to spare yourself the embarrassment.

"Can I kiss you?" Your eyebrows shot so far up and you swear you physically jumped. "WHat?" Your voice cracked and Ethan chuckled, "too forward?" He asked and you stuttered for a second before deciding to stop completely. "Uhm, no...I mean, I wouldn't mind if you..." You trailed off, your heart monitor picking up speed, which Ethan noticed. "Yes. You can." Ethan waisted no time moving in closer to you, though he stopped right before your lips collided, you were guessing it was just in case you wanted to stop him but lord knows you don't want him to. After a beat of silence and waiting, he did in fact place his lips on yours, it was delicate at first, like he didn't wanna accidentally hurt you but it soon turned more passionate. Both of you exhaled hard as Ethan readjusted himself so that one knee was leaning on your hospital bed. You lifted one of your hands and tangled it into his hair, giving it a small tug and seeing how it made him kiss you even harder. You heard the door open but neither of you seemed to want this moment to end enough to look up.

"Ethan I got the- oh!" Luther practically gasped, seeing Ethan hunched over your hospital bed, one knee leaning on it for more stability. A smirk found it's way to his face, his arms crossing as he took in the sight before him. He mouthed a 'wow' and shook his head, he should've seen this coming. "Mr. Hunt!" A doctor had yelled and Ethan finally seemed to realize others were in the room. He pulled away from the kiss, still staring in your eyes. He gave you a sheepish smile and shrugged right before he was pulled away from you. Your eyes shut as the hospital lights flooded your senses.

Ethan walked over to Luther, watching with a smile as the doctors did a routine check to make sure everything was alright. "So...what was all of that?" Luther asked, turning towards Ethan, who was still staring at you. He shrugged, "It was...everything.."

----!----

Thanks for reading! Have a great day/night!!

My requests are CLOSED but you can still send me messages to see if I'm close to opening them again!

See my DIRECTORY for upcoming fics!

Masterlist

[thesinglesjukebox]

(G)I-DLE - "QUEENCARD"

Time to find out once and for all -- like, for real this time -- who hates fun!

6.29

Kayla Beardslee: Dumb bitches assemble (affectionate). "Queencard" is kind of embarrassing to defend (you're going to bat for the boob and booty hot song? really?), but if you listen to it enough, it becomes impossible to deny that it's also kind of a banger. It would be a different matter if the production and topline weren't pulling their weight, but that bassline rips, and those line-to-line handoffs between all five members in the first verse get me every time. It also helps that this song comes from by far the best album (G)I-DLE has ever put out: when "Queencard" is placed next to the beautiful, dreamy B-side "Paradise" or the sinister-sexy "Lucid," its goofiness seems less like actual vapidity and more like Soyeon intentionally fucking around because she knows it's good to have a little fun and gas yourself up sometimes. Like, look me in the eyes and tell me it's not high performance art to release "Tomboy" and "Queencard" (and "Nxde"!) within a year of one another. I can get on board with a bit of silliness in exchange for the album I've been waiting for (G)I-DLE to make since I first discovered them -- which, as it happens, was when the Jukebox covered "Uh Oh" back in 2019. What a lovely and emotionally nuanced full-circle moment. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go back to twerking on the runway. [8]

Crystal Leww: MY BOOB AND BUTT IS HOT MY BOOB AND BUTT IS HOT MY BOOB AND BUTT IS HOT MY BOOB AND BUTT IS HOT MY BOOB AND BUTT IS HOT [8]

Katherine St Asaph: Vintage Fergie. [3]

Harlan Talib Ockey: Ridiculous. [7]

Tara Hillegeist: As an object lesson in one of pop music's golden rules -- "unfuckwithable production can save unforgivable lyrics every time" -- "Queencard" ticks all the bases. Embarrassing lines like "twerking on the runway" and "sexy like Kim Kardashian" that not even Meghan Trainor could've written with a straight face completely fail to dent that supple bassline and synth-bleep driven stomp of a beat. There isn't a single word of this song worth dignifying with a sincere analysis; there isn't a single word of this song that matters while the squelched-alarm bubble and squeak of a melody and irrepressible line delivery are still making the brain jiggle like so much excited jelly under their sonic assault. This is a missive from the same school of thought that produced "Song 2": a heady slab of music so thoroughly stupid yet sneeringly self-confident about it, hearing it excites the listener enough to mistake it for the work of a frustrated genius, instead. I cannot take its message seriously without taking insult. I can't stop pressing repeat. [7]

Will Adams: So many delightfully dumb lines, it's hard to choose a favorite. I wish the music had been equally as silly, as opposed to whatever Jonas Brothers purgatory it currently exists in. [5]

Alfred Soto: Elements from Pussycat Dolls and Meghan Trainor drift and fade with the attention span. [4]

Daniel Montesinos-Donaghy: This quintet's energy is infectious enough to take "Queencard" (great title) to the finish line, but there's no getting past the backing track. Envision every Black Friday/post-Christmas/commercial on TV, strip the jaunty musical beds from their flatscreen-deal context, then paste them one after the other. I'm sorry, but GO TO PRISON!!! [2]

Nortey Dowuona: Pop rock as an aesthetic is actually a good thing to be pilfering from. It's not novel or boundary pushing in the slightest, but after the last decade of everything stealing from rap -- the structures, the adlibs, the flows, the kicks, snares, hi-hats and percussion, the poses, the clothing -- and miserably failing to even slightly capture the same lightning strike... maybe don't be bothered to try. I've been listening to What Had Happened Was with Questlove, and at each turn I grow more frustrated by the fact that neither he nor Black Thought ever cottoned on to the giant possibilities of being an actual band, only producing musical phrases to be looped in the least interactive or vivid way. And this song, which is a solid approximation of 2005 pop rock and 2011 piss-take raps, just frustrates me cuz it feels like Jeon So-yeon, the group's Questlove, has the same problem; being able to make poppy Shafiq Husayn records and settling for Max Martin throwaways. [5]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: How long has it been since we've had an honest-to-god hook song? You could blame it on shifting musical trends, but ever since K-pop made it big in the West, lyrics have had to start making sense. This means we've been deprived of the joy that comes with wonky English. The lyrics are especially camp on "Queencard," but it goes beyond that: it's the total surrendering of a topline to phrasing and rhythm. Case in point: "My boob and booty" has syllabic parallels with "I'm top" and "twerking." There's also a slick maneuvering between English and Korean here, with (G)I-DLE selecting the words that sound best -- "ppoppo" is way more fun than "kiss," and "I'm cute" can be delivered with more sass than the same phrase in Korean. "Queencard" may not be a term the average American knows, but it doesn't matter: it's the sort of nonsense word that you can repeat incessantly, much like we all did with "gee" 14 years ago. To top it off, (G)I-DLE actually sound like they're enjoying themselves instead of delivering a Serious Message. We may never get a song like this again. [7]

David Moore: There's boob and booty and twerking in this one, sure, but the most exhilarating part of the whole thing is when the phrase "I'm a queencard" in the chorus devolves into uncanny syllables, like Jell-O starting to go runny in the sun, in a way doesn't just tell you what a queencard is, but really points to it -- this is a queencard. I'm reminded that K-pop isn't just multilingual, but often meta-lingual in the way that so much (all?) good pop is, refusing to let words get by as mere signifiers and forcing us to reckon with words at the phonemic, molecular level. How wild is it that the entire basis of our civilization is built on these funky noises we make with our mouths and tongues and lungs and noses and throats? I think that's neat. [8]

Kat Stevens: I worry that she's going to lose a lot of money at poker. [6]

Michael Hong: Look, Soyeon's English lyrics are often questionable, and it doesn't help that each member seems to drop syllables. She's exaggerated her "rapping" voice to be sharper and more piercing, and the lyric "look so cool, look so sexy like Kim Kardashian (uh) / look so cute, look so pretty like Ariana" fits awkwardly in the meter and is a bit reductive of each (but also your bad if you expected a nuanced feminist take from the group that brought you "Nxde"). And the entire thing is just a Valley Girl rip of "Song 2" by Blur. And yet, 4 + 4 is still: [8]

Brad Shoup: The pre-chorus is really interesting, how it teeters on the rim of Meghan Trainor maltshop-pop without ever falling in. It's a nice break from the spy-theme slink that dominates this. [5]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: Referencing Ariana Grande directly feels like giving away the game -- this is some real Dangerous Woman shit, a maximalist pop barrage that seems to operate on the principle that if you make enough baffling aesthetic and lyrical decisions it'll loop back to sense eventually. Joke's on me -- they're right! This sounds like how I imagine getting shot out of a T-shirt cannon would feel. [7]

Michelle Myers: Shuhua is a queencard. Soyeon is squeak-rapping like she's HyunA's daughter. Minnie is hosting a blue champagne party and doing her best Debbie Harry impression. Miyeon hard carries the pre-chorus. Yuqi is jamming the phrase "sexy like Kim Kardashian" into five syllables. She's top. She's twerking on the runway. [8]

Anna Katrina Lockwood: "I'm twerking on the runway" has got to be in the top five greatest stunt English lines in K-pop history. (G)I-DLE have always had oodles of talent and charisma, but "Queencard," like last year's "Tomboy," has the confidence of maturity and a rare sense of unfettered enjoyment. Nobody's had such a good time in a music video since GD and TOP went to the club. Speaking of YG party songs, of course this is reminiscent of that format---though as others have pointed out, it lacks the true YG party chorus to close. There are a few better precedents in Cube's own history, which are combined effectively with a vaguely punk rock sound and a sensitive handful of blog house references. Part of the magic has to be the judicious editing Soyeon has applied here -- "Queencard" is a blisteringly tight 2:41, far from the bloat often befalling her earlier compositions. It's fun, you can shout along to it, there's a funny little dance, there are at least three melodies I've had stuck in my head--it's some good fucking K-pop. [9]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]

[formulatrash]

Do you think George really could have got third? He was angry about it but Mercedes looked too slow. Idk whether to believe the upgrades worked

hmmm, well. "idk whether to believe the upgrades worked" will be roughly where the team is, too, tbh. Monaco is a terrible circuit to assess anything on, since it's nothing like any other F1 circuit and clearly things like the straight line speed and DRS advantage deficit aren't going to get any kind of airing on a track that small.

for what it's worth, I thought Merc looked quite strong in Monaco, especially given neither George or Lewis is especially good round there. it was George's one shocker in F2 (he qualified 3 billionth and crashed both races) and he's only ever been alright-ish in F1. Lewis has won a surprisingly low number of times there for the number of times he's won anywhere else which, in the case of Lewis, is like saying "hey, guy's probably only like third-best ever at this circuit" but like, not one of his best by his own, uniquely high, standards.

that said this was obviously a silly and goofy year of Monaco with a lot of on-track overtaking. moving forward more than one place in Monaco is always a bit of an achievement and although some of Merc's progression was Carlos slipping back, clearly they weren't hopeless in any of the conditions.

compare that to, say, AlphaTauri and McLaren where Yuki was miles ahead of Lando for most of the race and then completely lost control of the car in the wet, you can easily see the diference between Merc and a midfield team for overall stability and race execution. or if you look at Ferrari, whose car was tricky in the dry and borderline undrivable in the wet or intermediate conditions, Mercedes certainly seem to have taken a step ahead of them.

was third nailed on if George hadn't done that particular goof? idk, he might have done a different goof. it's easy in the heat of the post-race, pre-debrief media sessions to fixate on the sliding doors moment where you saw something slip away and I'm not going to pretend I'm booting up ATLAS to run the data on whether Esteban could have caught and passed him otherwise. especially since that's only data; what if Esteban had also goofed?

at the end of the day, even in Formula 1 racing is done on track. George, as it happens, could not get third because that isn't how the race played out and you can't do a flashback IRL - just like McLaren's call to pit Lando was an obvious sign there was a huge storm cloud incoming because hindsight really do be like that.

on the plus side for Mercedes fans, Barcelona is the track that teams love testing upgrades on so the team got them out for that. clearly, as you can see by the various patchwork carbon fibre pieces involved in the photos, there was a bit of rushing to do this and smaller teams like McL are still waiting for theirs for three races. getting the upgrades to Barcelona, even without the Imola data, is a big win for Merc and I'd expect to see at least a clear direction in terms of what they're doing and how they're developing for the rest of the season and next year from this point on.

[inkofamethyst]

August 3, 2023

Now that I will be attending a school without regular free performing arts events from what I can tell (crying, screaming, throwing up), I'm going to need to budget for seeing performances. I can't just waltz into a free opera now because the tickets cost like seventy dollars, even through my uni's ""subsidized"" ticket page (wait I just checked the official venue website and they offer much cheaper student tickets lol). My mom gave me a budget template that I'm going to try to use for the next few months. I'm considering eventually coding a version of it in Notion, but that might make it harder to have a backup if I ever decide to drop Notion.

hhhhhhh I mean at least I'll get Adobe for free for a few more years (I am not good at using Adobe and find the learning curve incredibly steep but I do like getting expensive things for free).

Not to sound like a millennial, but adulting does suck. Like actually. For example. I love the idea of insurance. Finding an insurance provider though sounds like the most boring thing ever. And that's not even the worst of it. I have to find a primary care provider. And potentially a therapist. And (good) therapy ain't cheap. I liked it when I was cosplaying as an adult right down the road from home.

I went to see Barbie today!!!! I really enjoyed it :D It was super goofy, super silly, and then it did get rather serious and heartfelt. I also wore the peachy-pink dress I had nearly finished a few months ago (adding ties in the back to make the waist a wee more fitted was really the main fix), and the first person I spoke to while wearing it told me how cute they thought it was and of course I had to excitedly tell them that I'd finished it that morning. I mean I felt cute beforehand but that put me over the top fr. It's not perfect by any means, but I made it, it's mine, and from far enough away it's really super cute! Definitely a make I'll be taking with me despite the fact that the fabric wrinkles like that's its full time job. So goes rayon, I guess. Anyway it was really fun walking into the theater surrounded by other women and girls who were also wearing pink. As someone who doesn't wear pink ever, it felt weirdly empowering. Maybe because we were united in obnoxious femininity, and that togetherness was strength, of a sort. Well, whatever I was feeling and whyever I was feeling it, I dig it.

Today I'm thankful that my grad school orientation is online lol. Part of me was hoping for an in-person multi-day undergrad-like orientation event, but I suppose I don't really need that. I know, generally, how school works, and this one can't be all that much different. Besides, there's more flexibility this way.

[bugcatcherwill]

"Hylia have mercy on mayor Reede" or don't. Link kill him now /silly

I am SIFTING through a MASSIVE HEAP of Link lore. SNiffing around this entire chapter like a dohggg. I LOVE IT I'm stuffing it all into my little goblin sack and running off

FuUCK seeing Hateno in both physical and metaphorical shambles is so disheartening,,,, it was such a cozy place and then the lab shenaniganing went down and everything went to SHITE.,,,,,,,,,,,, side eyeing Reede with the fury of a thousand suns

mf better be glad Link didn't wait for the main four to come back before he went off !!!!1 I can't see him bringing Zayl for obvious reasons but it's so funny to imagine Reede opening his door to the worlds most righteously infuriated twink [which is already terrifying] and three monsters fully fucking prepared to start pummeling this middle aged man. I'VE MADE UP scenarios in my BRAIN before this chapter where Link fucking goes to Hateno with Rezek's invisible ass behind it and when Reede tries to make a run for it Wizzrobe Jumpscare. I don't think they'd hurt him [too bad] BUT THAT'S PART OF THE APPEAL,,, it's the same thing like what Khini felt when Sledge looked at him and it was so wild to him because it was a monster looking at him with fully comprehensible human emotion I fucking love when instead of hurting someone the monsters just give them the most harrowingly disappointed look and leave them be because it can't be helped and it's HAUNTING. It's late and I'm incomprehensible rn but IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. FUCXKE

plus if you consider the whole wizzrobes are usually goofy looking and all that. realizing that a wizzrobe specifically is unhappy BECAUSE OF YOU would be HAUNTING. YOU KNWO

anyways obligatory end note this chapter fucked I CNAT WAITE FUCKEVERYTHING

YEAAAAA especially showing Hateno's declining state it's like

I love small town rot. I love when something bad happens in an otherwise connected and homely town because it's such a good deconstruction of that veil. The veil of "polite, but not nice", and their idea of a "civilized settlement".

It especially hits hard as someone who grew up and lives in the American Midwest. So many smaller towns are self-described as "homey" and "cozy" and "full of wonderful people!" but so many times it's that polite-but-not-nice facade.

Because once an outsider comes along that's far from any of their established norms, you see their true colors. And it's not pretty.

Hell, you even see this in our suburbs, too. ESPECIALLY in the 'burbs, actually.

They always hated Purah's lab, and her seclusion, and her ties to the Sheikah. They were really just looking for an excuse. They also hated monsters, so the years of the community festering their distaste for that house on the hill led to the obvious conclusion.

But now that the veil has been sufficiently torn off, all of Hateno is seeing each other for how they saw themselves. If they were so eager to join in and torch a house to ground, then everyone else around them would do the same if the town found some dirt on them, right? Projection and paranoia are a dangerous combination.

....oh yeah, back to the chapter...

BUT YEAH CATHARSIS IS DEFINITELY COMING FOR THE MONSTERS

I mostly wanted Link to go back to Hateno on his own because I thought it'd be great for his own solo-development and story. Allow him a bit more spotlight and show some of his past (oops all ANGST).

But also because a big theme I'm going with the Hateno return arc is "you shouldn't need to see the consequences to know what you did was wrong"

Rezek jumpscaring Reede would be fucking hilarious tho lkjhdsafkjhlfdsa

But also godddddd I still don't know how I'd make Zayl react once it goes back to Hateno for whatever reason. I've RARELY shown it as actually mad so I gotta make sure the first time it gets upset enough to be visibly angry will be worth it,,,

BUT YEAH NEXT CHAPTER'S GONNA BE REAL GOOD I HOPE AUUUUUGH

[casspurrjoybell-27]

In a Heartbeat - Chapter 48 - Part 3

*Warning - Adult Content*

Vince

"What brings you two here?"

Simon nudged Xavier, looking at him expectantly.

Xavier pouted before giving me an indifferent look.

"I'm still mad but..." he huffed but Simon nudged his arm again.

Xavier stalled before mumbling...

"I don't know how long I'll still be mad but... but I lied."

I blinked, waiting for an explanation.

I could tell he was nervous, with the way he gnawed on his bottom lip, the way he crossed his legs together whenever he felt uneasy.

"You're still my brother," he elaborated.

"And you... you didn't know, so... so..." Simon squeezed Xavier's hand at his side, looking at him patiently.

Xavier gulped before saying softly.

"So, I don't hate you."

It was like an invisible weight lifting off both of our shoulders.

It was a relief to hear that and it appears to be the same in his case.

Xavier was never one for holding grudges and it didn't dawn on me how torn up he'd be about this.

"Thanks," I muttered, not even sure if that was appropriate.

He pouted before looking at me with one of his goofy faces.

"You're still annoying and you still drive me crazy and I'm still mad and don't think that I'm going to do all of your silly tasks anymore."

"I know," I said.

"I got you."

Next to him, Simon was smiling at the interaction, almost lost in thought before blinking out of it.

He cleared his throat.

"There was something else we came here for, actually."

"Right," my brother seemed to remember.

"I think it'd be nice to join us, to see mom."

"Mom?" I frowned.

"Xavier told me you hadn't seen her in a while," Simon explained.

"We thought it'd be nice to see her together."

In actuality, I hadn't seen her in years.

Xavier had been the one to visit her often and ever since she was considered hospice, I never saw it in me to visit her.

The last time I had seen her was Goddess knows how long and we didn't particularly end on a good note.

"I don't know about that."

"She misses you," Xavier said firmly.

I scoffed.

"I doubt that."

Simon looked at me with a sad gleam in his eyes.

"She's your mother."

"Look, I don't know," I shrugged.

"I don't think..."

"Vince," Xavier pursed his lips.

"Please. She's deteriorating fast. I don't know how long she'll last. I can't keep making excuses as to why you haven't visited."

Xavier was always attached to mom growing up, more than me and Michael combined.

After all, he wasn't forced into training like we were.

Of course, he learned the basics but he spent most days doing normal kid things with mom.

Even after all these years, I was certain he was mom's favorite.

Knowing she was dying was obviously a heavy subject that I knew Xavier struggled with but honestly, I don't think she really cared about Michael and me, especially after what I had done and with the way our last argument ended.

"And Michael?"

I frowned.

I had already gotten my dose of speaking to him today, I didn't want to have to deal with him and our mother in the same room.

"Did you invite him too?"

"He's already visited her. She wants to see you," Xavier explained.

Simon squeezed my wrist in his hand, looking at me with doe-like eyes.

"Please."

Damn, seeing those pleading eyes stirred up this weird feeling.

Even my wolf was begging to listen to him in the back of my mind.

"Fine," I told them.

"I'll go."

[sungtaro]

hi hi I'm the aspiring teume anon from earlier 🐇 hmm honestly I've just seen them around for so long and they seem so goofy (aka my fave thing abt groups) so I can't help but wanting to know them more.

I do think I have a few songs of them saved that I sometime listen to. lemme check- oh rightt I love darari and jikjin but that's basic of me and I do have boy as well that I listen to occasionally that I also like!

and ofc the thing that help me the most to get into a group is them just catching my eyes 👀👀 but yeah im not sure yet. usually I can guess my bias pretty fast just from looking at them but I'm not sure bc they're all cute 🥺 but maybe (definitely not for sure yes actually it is) hyunsuk and yoshi caught my eye a lil more (I remember esp when watching performance vids a few times).

hhhh who knew I have sm to say abt them, I would love to hear what/who u love most and also like if u have any recommendations like ur fave songs or vids of them (not necessarily what u think I'd like but what u like, I think for me seeing someone love their ults makes me fall hard for them too)

Sorry this turned out so long I was rambling. Hope u have a good day/night!🩷🩷

yaaay this is so exciting 🫶🏻 jikjin and darari are so valid i rly think that comeback got a lot of people's attention bc it was so strong! hyunsuk and yoshi are such a pair, i feel like if you bias one you kind of end up biasing the other 😂 they're both really soft and sweet but yoshi is also lowkey playful / an unexpected menace haha. this will be long so i'll put my ramblings under the cut 🤩

there is sooo much i love about trejo but i think a major thing is that i actually love their entire discography, like i do not think they have a single bad song. i'm mainly a b-side enthusiast (u, volkno, come to me, darari rock remix, be with me ...) but my favorite title has always been 'i love you' which is what initially got me into them; i saw the music video and it felt like it was tailored to my tastes with the bright colors, aesthetic sets and the more refreshing concept, they just looked like they were having so much fun. after that, it was over for me lol i watched everything i could get my hands on, including all of treasure map, which i always recommend to new teumes if you have time to just watch from the beginning because you really get to know them and see how much their relationships grow over time. but if i had to recommend just a couple episodes my favorite of all time is 30-31 it is PEAK treasure silly chaos. sadly, we did lose 2 members this last year but mashiho and yedam are back on instagram and working on their own projects so we're all just waiting to see what they'll do next, and supporting the group as a 10 piece!

i love that the members who are interested in it have opportunities to be part of the writing and production; and ones who aren't ready for that at the official album level still get chances to practice on their own. y/g may give me a headache 99% of the time but it's clear that they foster their idols as artists and i really appreciate that. asahi especially does a lot w this, he's behind 'orange' and 'thank you' ; and rap line also does quite a bit of writing, i rly think volkno is some of their absolute best work and you can hear how much influence they pull from iconic artists. treasure in particular is also first and foremost a performance team - so the focus was to have a balanced lineup that can really put on a show. hands down this group is top of 4th gen performancewise, their stage presence and command is INSANE especially given that they had a pandemic debut. i highly recommend checking out any of their end of year show stages if you haven't - even their early ones - but particularly 2022 mama , & their GDA performance is of all the songs you have saved !

as for my favorite members, i think everyone knows jaehyuk has my heart but actually my first treasure ult is jihoon 💖 i could talk about them for a zillion years so i won't go on that rant in this response lol but i do love all the members and i think what i really like about large groups (and why i keep ending up stanning them lol) is that you get to see a lot of different relationship dynamics, it's i think a lot harder to fake a 'we're all best friends' narrative in a big group and i appreciate that because i don't buy that all (or even most) groups are all best friends lol it's not realistic. i'd rather see a group that works well as a team and treasure is definitely that, they see themselves that way and you can tell by how they treat each other and work together that there's a ton of love and respect and yes, a lot of real friendships there. and they ARE goofy hehe. anyways ... i think that's a good start LOL i hope it is i really just kind of went into rant mode so i hope i didn't bore you and that you might find some helpful stuff in here 🥰

[ratilyn]

I'm so goddamn lucky. I had all 4 wisdom teeth removed on Friday night and my boyfriend spent the entire day cooking chicken soup for me and he went shopping to grab me all the soft foods I like and he made jelly for me and has been doing everything for me. When I came back from the surgery he brought me into our room after reading all the information that I was given and he had made the bed all nice and put my stuffed toys on our bed all cute like (yes, I'm nearly 21 and I have so many stuffed toys, I'm healing my inner child shuddup) and he even bought me a new one that I had my eye on. I know I sound so silly and goofy (I'm on very hard pain killers so I'm gonna blame it on that) but my god I've never had anyone do anything like that for me before. We've been together for two years next month and I can't wait to celebrate all we've been through together. I'm so lucky to have this man in my life, I couldn't be more in love (: