#can't turn off the autism

[fedorahead]

skip this post if you value your sanity

i cropped this poorly: these are screenshots

There is a difference between spilling your guts dramatically describing your internal process online and outright replying to someone who has said "i don't know you" with a description of what you now want to do out of social awkwardness and if you can't tell the difference and want to shame people online, the only end result you're gonna get is making someone who was admitting a vulnerability in a healthy way (specifically, by *not* inflicting it on someone setting a boundary but by discussing it in a social forum as a hypothetical) feel less safe to explore the mechanisms of their unhealthy responses where they can get external feedback.

also, "i don't know you", at least where i come from, is an incredibly rude phrase and anyone who says it has already breached the social contract and switched the conversation to hostility. idk where y'all live where that isn't the case, but it absolutely is in many places and an anxious response to the phrase is natural. it roughly translates to "i don't know who you think you are, but you are so far below me that i am shocked at your audacity to interact with me".

i know this is a website full of kids and teens who are still learning how shit works but man, y'all gotta be kinder. people come on here to get away from the nastiness of real life and other social networks.

you wanna talk manipulative behaviours, maybe we should go into how people love to weaponize culturally loaded phrases like "i don't know you" against people with social anxiety (or other neurodivergent people who process social situations differently and are often bullied in this way) and then pretend that it's just boundary setting and that the anxious person is the unhealthy one for picking up on the passive aggressive hostility 🙃

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

something i've been thinking about:

Wally is set up as a sort of "main character" by the whrp. he's said in the site's description of the show to have introduced the main theme/lesson of the day's episode, and then the rest of the neighbors join him on his escapades. but then we have our first glimpses of everyone's actual dynamics and characters through the audios and you look at Wally and its like

first of all, thats an npc. second, nearly everybody else has severe main character syndrome

but its fascinating how Wally is just kind of... There. he doesnt talk much. he doesnt contribute beyond a couple of lines. its more like he joins the others on their shenanigans. he fades into the background. he's off to the side while everyone else holds conversations & leads the moment

Wally, despite being described as Thee character, is borderline background.

& whats even more interesting, within his individual secret audio files and interactions - he's almost chatty. not only that but the way he talks is more confident and faster paced. he's taking initiative. he can be kinda pushy. when talking to the qa/whrp/Us, he acts more like the character his descriptions portray. he acts more like a person instead of a puppet waiting for his next cue

I cant tell if - when around the neighbors - his tepid milk behavior is a purposeful act or if he's masking. and if he's masking, is it deliberate or involuntary? and in regards to both, why is he acting so different? It could be tied to what he's trying to accomplish. if he's trying to "restore" Welcome Home, it would make sense for him to act as he does around the neighbors - he wouldnt want to clue them in that he knows so much more than he's letting on, would he?

but then that begs another train of thought - what if he isn't acting or masking? if there is a time discrepancy between Wally's interactions with the qa/whrp/Us & the more 'official' audios, that could explain the difference in behavior. we could be getting glimpses into "future" (read: current) Wally, who's had much more time to figure himself out since we can safely assume he started out as a blank slate. we could be seeing a more experienced Wally than the one seen with his friends.

of course that line of thinking loses some merit when considering the 14 "bug" audios. or it could lend to it... if we're seeing a more experienced Wally but his friends are only seeing what he allows them to. it's still him, just... a carefully curated version.

in general it could really tie into the themes of identity and change and being other, to me. when you're so different - or you feel so different - that you can't bring yourself to be your most authentic you around your friends. when you feel like you have to hold back and be who you think they expect you to be, or what would be most palatable. most normal. will they accept you as you really are? there's always the fear and terror that the people you consider closest to you won't. or when you're so scared of change that you'll shove down & lock away parts of yourself so that you can keep things as you are. because once they know you've changed, so will they. and really, do you want to even accept that you've changed? what if that's what scares you most of all - that you're different, you've metamorphosized, you can't go back to the way things were because you yourself are no longer the person you were before. there is no reversing this no matter how much you try or pretend

[mobblespsycho100]

kabru as a pwnpd headcanon is genuinely so iconic that man rlly is odysseus' hubristic tendencies made manifest tbh . . .

[penofwildfire]

Y'know I'm pretty sure obsessively thinking about a lego cartoon all day every day for over a decade to the point that it's a key part of your entire personality and one of the first things people know about you is just. Not a very allistic thing to do. Y'know? You understand me?

[trash-and-trash-accessories]

I'm from the Southeastern United States (kind of, my lore is complicated) and living in Appalachia. One thing I've notice living here is that people who were raised in Leftist/Liberal and/or Northerner households are actually MORE sexist towards the Southern Women than the locals who were raised in more traditional Southern families. The Northern/Liberal-raised people respect women in an abstract way. They have immense respect for the strong, direct, pragmatic women in their own lives and families. But they do not respect what I would call Southern Ladies. Not at all. They think Southern ladies are incredibly stupid, have nothing to contribute, and they simply do not respect them. And those are the majority of women around here.

And I have found this disconnect to be a cultural difference. Southern women tend to speak in a very indirect way and are taught to do that. They would never say "You're doing it wrong, you idiot" they would say "The last guy did it different" and describe how the last man did it. They wouldn't say "This is the solution to your problem moron" they would say "Well sweetie, my daddy had a similar problem and he did x thing." They assign their own knowledge and opinion to a third party instead of claiming to know things or be experts. This is a linguistic norm that came about because of the extreme sexism of the society Southern women were living in, but now it's so codified in their language and norms that southern men understand this language and when a woman says "my daddy did it a different way" he knows that she is telling him he's doing it wrong and perhaps even calling him stupid. But she's maintaining social norms while doing so, and usually these women also say these things privately, and politely so as to spare his feelings. Though not always. Many Southern women ARE very assertive. It's just different than it is in other regions.

So these men who were raised by liberals and leftists and northerners who didn't grow up with these linguistic norms hear the Southern women speaking this way, they hear them say things like "I'm confused, is it supposed to look like that?" and they take their words at face value, and assume those women are stupid. They take corrections from polite Southern women as statements of ignorance and stupidity. A woman is correcting them, but they take away that she doesn't understand how it works and is stupid. I see this happen all the time.

Southern men will hear, "Sweetie is it supposed to look like that?" as as a correction, as "it's not supposed to look like that you did it wrong." Whereas the people not raised with these traditional norms will assume she genuinely doesn't know.

Since I was raised with this soft, indirect linguistic style and have generally always been regarded as a woman, I have and sometimes still do experience this firsthand. And the consensus among Southern women about this phenomenon is that these men are extremely stupid. If a man doesn't understand these secret linguistic codes they regard him as an idiot and begin treating him with immense disrespect.

I try to explain this to my liberal Northern friends and they say things like "why doesn't she just say that then" or "She should be more direct then" but You came into HER culture. People go to, say, Japan and try their best to navigate cultural norms that differ from their own but they simply refuse to do it when coming to Appalachia and the South. Even though the culture here is very different and distinct. She IS being direct with you, in the context of her culture. You simply don't understand it and assign ignorance and stupidity to her in a way that you likely would not as readily assign to a man. (though I do see this happen to men too, to a lesser extent, because of this same indirect and polite communication style)

[quatregats]

Having a real "*freeze frame**record scratch* oh hey it's me you might be wondering how I ended up here" kind of moment rn

[thesaltyace]

Spouse will indeed be required to testify at the trial. 🤦

[fagdykevash]

i'm glad there's a turn off reblogs feature now bc it gives ppl control over their posts etc etc but i also kinda wish it wasn't there bc i need to document posts i think abt with the #on my mind tag. for organizational purposes (<- ocd)

[fantasy-costco]

I think it's so funny when Data gets possessed in next Gen cause every time it happens the thing possessing him is completely able to emote/move fluidly/etc. But they're still running on datas operating system because they're still just in datas body. Which means that data SHOULD logically be able to do all those things, but he still just. Doesn't.

To be clear this isn't 'did data actually have emotions the whole time?' because that's an entirely different question (he did). It's 'datas body and operating system was fully capable of moving fluidly with convincing facial expressions and data explicitly chose not to do that for some reason'

[unpredictablestuff]

Because calling Kool-Aid a soft drink has understandably upset a lot of people, a quick search for their ads from the 1980s turned this up:

[neotibicen-linnei]

autism question, does anyone else feel overcome with rage as soon as they're able to stop masking or is that just me

[theheelerhouse]

Autistic Littles!

Hello there! This post is for caregivers who care for littles who are autistic. Here's some ways to help with meltdowns or times when autism is being meaner than usual! (All from my personal experience as someone with autism! Not everyone is the same!)

First, let's start with some of the possible warning signs of a meltdown! 1. Sensory Issues worse than usual -> Textures may be described as "wrong" or "bad" -> Things may be perceived as louder than they actually are -> Things may be perceived as brighter than they actually are -> Room feels like it's closing in around you 2. May become more irritable -> May be more prone to snapping or having an attitude -> Could possibly be described as more "stubborn" 3. Trouble communicating -> Being non-verbal for a prolonged amount of time -> Trouble expressing feelings or emotions -> Could also speak faster than usual or slower than usual -> Saying things like "I don't know what's wrong" or "I can't figure out what's happening" 4. Difficulty taking care of self -> Forgetting to eat/not wanting to -> Not sleeping as they normally would -> Not having the motivation or energy to do basic tasks 5. Isolation -> This is a big warning sign! -> Not wanting to go out/leave the house/leave their room -> Struggling when they do leave their space 6. Increase in stimming (whether super noticeable stims, or more passive ones) -> Hand flapping, rocking, mouth popping, hair fidgeting, fidgeting with hands, etc These are some of the possible warning signs, but everyone is different. Now, here's some ways you can help a little experiencing this.

~Be patient and understanding. Autism can be scary outside of littlespace, but it can be scarier when little. Try not to get angry or frustrated. ~Avoid yelling or any other loud noises ~Don't force them to talk or communicate. Sometimes it's better to just have someone there ~Listen if they do try and communicate their needs. ~Going along with the one above, but don't feel hurt or like you did something wrong if they ask to be left alone or tell you they need space. Sometimes having someone around is too much and they might just need to process their emotions on their own. ~Communicate on ways to help once the meltdown seems to subside ~Remember that everyone is different. What you've seen work for someone might not work for someone else. It varies (which is why communication is good) ~Try to give suggestions if sensory issues is something that's a main struggle ("Try changing into comfy clothes" "Try a different blanket" "Turn off the TV?" "Turn off the lights?") Just trying to figure out what helps and what doesn't ~Offer a distraction if that's what they need (Ask about hyperfixations, even if you already know the answers to the questions. One of the good ones for me that always seems to come up is dinosaurs <3)

Remember: It's okay if something you do doesn't help. That's how you learn and you know not to do that thing next time. It's okay <3 You're doing great

[arcadian-vampire]

How to not be anxious about upcoming therapy appt: Start a project relating to your special interest, so you end up glancing at the clock feeling more annoyed than anything else

[fastbrain]

Positive emotions can appear as though I have high energy levels, so part of why I suppress them is that I don't want anyone to assume I have space for a higher mental load.

Infuriating when I'm exhausted but my mask doesn't look like it.

Op turned off reblogs so here’s the post as a pic. And here’s the link to the thread: https://href.li/?https://twitter.com/the_tweedy/status/1600287106072735744

[leebrontide]

Here's a funny little story about disability accommodation.

So I'm a bit deaf. Like...I have a prescription for a hearing aide but don't own one kind of a bit deaf. And I used to work at this noisy ass addiction treatment clinic. So even in my office I relied a lot on lipreading.

So one day I'm working with this client, and she's getting more and more upset and shut down, no matter how I try to steer us onto a calm, relaxed subject of conversation. And I can't figure out why the conversation has gone so far south.

And then I realize I am sitting at a buckwild angle in my chair, leaning waaaay over to the side. I'm almost falling off this chair. I look like a total goober.

And then I realize I'm doing that because I'm trying to lipread this client, who keeps turning further and further down and away from me. I probably would have noticed sooner but lipreading is actually kind of hard and I was focusing on noticing her upset rather than my body language.

And then it clicks.

She thinks I'm leaning like this because I am being a passive-aggressive asshole who is trying to force/shame her into making eye contact with me. I'd known this client enough to know she hates eye contact- possibly autism, possibly anxiety. Always possible it's both or something else.

I sit up straight and say. "Oh! Hey, I don't give a shit about eye contact, I'm trying to read your lips so I can understand what you're saying to me."

Instant vibe change. She relaxes, and sits upright comfortably in her chair, looking about a foot to the left of my head, so I can see her face clearly but she doesn't have to either fake or evade unwanted eye contact.

From then on things go a lot smoother, and we can get some good work done.

One side benefit from normalizing accommodations and reducing barriers to them is that it allows for low-stress conversations about what everybody needs in order to fully participate in an interaction. If I hadn't named the need I was trying to meet, she wouldn't have realized she could have her need met as well.

[hfjonewiki]

a non-comprehensive list of my favorite brian koch cheese credit card answers

pickle wishes he never met taco

nickel needs balloon way more than he realizes

salt needs pepper way more than she realizes

if taco had the chance to do it all again differently, she would

fan's favorite game would be lego star wars

apple still has her pony from santa, which she named "dino brawler". this is presumably the toy she was holding in episode 16

knife tried harder to be good at video games than he lets on

suitcase is still a little annoyed with oj for eliminating her for no reason in episode 7

oj and bomb are on better terms now, but will never be best friends again

he sees soap and microphone having a more sibling-like relationship, since their voice actresses are sisters (judging by the 20+ private replies, someone had some opinions on this one)

mephone 3gs didn't know his crew very well. when he watched them die, he was surprised by how much he felt

pickle genuinely made taco laugh a few times during season one

evil paper liked playing checkers (this implies that this is a trait exclusive to him that paper himself does not share)

mephone x would probably use he/him pronouns, but cobs doesn't put that much thought or humanity into the mephones anymore

mephone4 wanted to impress cobs for a long time, but meeting 3gs recontextualized a lot of his negative feelings

if mephone4 wasn't hosting inanimate insanity, he would probably be a lost media archivist

taco doesn't have nearly enough hobbies. brian thinks that's part of the problem

nickel sees himself as more worthless than most would assume

mephone4 and oj's relationship is "honestly not great"

under the guise of "scheming", taco and mic would sometimes just hang out together when there wasn't anything game-related to do

trophy struggles to do push-ups

despite being an outdated medium, cobs still sends out discs with nothing but propaganda material on them

despite not sharing much screentime together, brian thinks knife and pickle are the best ii yaoi

yin-yang likes being in cars. yin will drive, and yang will pick the music

soap would play splatoon, since all of the messes are just virtual

mephone4 is iffy on physical contact due to his past experiences with cobs

salt genuinely thought her and oj were in a relationship

just like mephone4, mephone4s' favorite food is cookies

cobs doesn't see himself as evil, he's just giving the people what they want. "not what they think they want. what they ACTUALLY want."

if silver spoon and candle are occupying the same space, people will leave because they can't take seeing how silver acts when he's around her

for a long time, baseball was the only person nickel respected

if mephone5 could live an everyday life, he would be a public menace. (destroying property, going up the down escalator)

taco actually enjoys the taste of lemon

while characters like fan weren't originally written with the intent of being on the autism spectrum, he lines right up with it

on a scale of 1-10, the amount that mepad misses toilet is "off the charts"

toilet wanted to impress mephone4 like a son would want to impress a father. "the cycle repeats a bit."

lightbulb and paintbrush take turns feeding baxter, but paintbrush usually ends up doing it because lightbulb isn't particular enough about what she considers "food"

mepad's favorite colors are black and white. "very mesmerizing."

walkie talkie (and presumably other invitational characters) didn't attend the hotel oj party

knife doesn't need to work out. he's just naturally like that

when someone asked if fantube was canon, brian answered "what more do they have to do?!"

springy hasn't had their own cereal in a long time

microphone and taco have both never been closer to someone else than they were with each other

silver and candle are a bit more distant now, but they both agree it's for the best

when the eliminated contestants were still being kept in the hotel oj closet, mepad would "unfeelingly" deliver and check in on them at mephone's request