#can you tell zeke is one of my favorites

[jeanbie]

Omg hi I don’t know if you take nsfw requests but I was wondering about aot’s favorite positions🥺 your writing is so so good!!

honestly.....i thought this was hard !!! i can't see any of them being overly picky on positions or even having all time favs; over the eras of aot, they all change so much it's actually hard to say...so i tried my best to think semi-objectively :3 absolutely feel free to disagree with ANY of these, everyone has diff interpretations (and i love all of em)

warnings: fem!reader (sorry), sexual content ofc, if u want the girl vers lemme know :D

AOT BOYS & FAV POSITIONS ★ masterlist.

MISSIONARY

“you look so fucking pretty right now—” is the only thing they can think of saying as they bow their chest over yours, watching your face twist as their cock sinks deeper into your cunt. one of your legs is wrapped firmly around their waist or hanging up over their shoulder; this way, they can watch you writhe and whimper whilst also watching the way you suck them up nicely, the way your body tenses and flinches with every thrust they give...

— jean, zeke, niccolo

RIDING

there is no greater joy than leaning back and watching you do your thing. their hands are on your waist, smoothing around your hips and stomach in an effort to distract themselves from simply filling you up and going wild — they love to watch you sinking down on them, your back arched and breasts rising with every rise and fall. they meet your hips by raising their own, finding pleasure in watching your face pull into contorted shapes, hearing the moans and whimpers from your mouth. from down here, they like the control they can have, and on occasion, the submission of doing whatever you tell them to

— levi, armin, porco

BENT OVER

if they can bend you over it, they can fuck you on it. tables, beds, tree trunks, fences, desks, sinks — it’s like they’re trying to fuck you on every possible or available surface they can find. they just love to see the sight of your ass tilted up, hips pressing into a hard surface, legs spread in a desperate attempt to stay upright, all while they drive themselves into you however fast or hard they want to. they can be as gentle or as rough as they want to be; running their hands up your back and between your shoulder blades, or smacking your ass and pulling your hair — everything about fucking you from behind is perfect for them, and by the sounds of things, perfect for you

— eren, floch

[bonus] s4!eren loves to fuck you over a sink or a vanity, anywhere he can pull you back by your hair and make you watch in the mirror. his eyes never leave yours through the glass, his lips whispering the dirtiest things he can possibly think of just to get you to cum around him, to watch yourself unravel in his hands

RIDING THEIR FACE

they are a seat. that’s all they are, all they ever want to be — a seat for their perfect partner. they could spend hours with their tongue up your cunt, hands pressed into your ass or hips as you ride the features on their face. they would happily die of suffocation down here, just as long as you were happy and they got to taste their favourite thing in the world

— connie, onyankopon

GIVING THEM A BLOWJOB

every position is good with their partner, but absolutely nothing beats you on your knees between their legs, their cock in your mouth. a hand in your hair, on your cheek or the back of your neck, they love to watch you take care of them, especially after a particularly long and otherwise bad day. whether it’s simply between their legs as they sit, or as they lie down before bed — or under a desk when there are other people around, nothing will ever top the feeling of your mouth running itself up their dick, or how warm and wet it feels as you take them. 

— ERWIN, bertolt

REVERSE COWGIRL

“comfy, darlin?” with their hands on your hips, they love to help you sink down onto them, using your hips as handles to bring you up and down at whatever pace they fancy. they just love the sight of your face turning back to him with a pleasured look, the muscles in your back tensing whenever he hits that perfect spot up your pussy. seeing you looking like this makes him feel so proud — you’re taking him like its no problem, your ass bouncing on his stomach, toes curling as you set your hands on his legs for balance. he’ll let you take control until you tire, and then the fun can really begin

— reiner, kenny (help)

[jeankirsteinsgrlfrnd]

could you pls do one for aot boys x friends with benefits reader

aot boys as fwb

18+ MDNI

eren is so hard to be friends with benefits. you walk a very fine line between being fuck buddies and being in a relationship. he has no shame about it because he does love you. he just likes fucking you more. the thought of you as his secret is something so special to him.

armin is the sweetest boy to be friends with benefits with. although, he’s not very good at it. he seems to ignore the ‘friend’ part. he brings you flowers occasionally and you have to keep reminding him you’re not together, you’re just screwing around. he says he knows but you think he’s delusional.

fucking connie is easy. being friends with connie is easy. he worships the ground you walk on, doing whatever you want him to do to you. he’s ruthless, though. fucking you wherever, whenever. ‘because that’s what friends do, right?’

jean is complex. your relationship, already complex, is made ten times more difficult because of him. he fucks you like it’s nothing but he stays up late on the phone with you. he tells you you’re nothing to him but a girl to sleep with, but he invites you over to comfort him when he’s upset. he’s hot and cold. it drives you insane.

reiner doesn’t really text you that much but you’re not quite sure he understands the concept of fwb. when you’re together, he likes to do a lot of talking. you’re always telling him to shut up and just touch you. he gets embarrassed every time even though he agreed to this.

bertholdt is so gentle with you and you wish he wasn’t. you want him to completely violate you but he just can’t bring himself to do it. he says it’s because he respects you too much but you tell him the whole point of FWB is there’s no respect. it’s just filth.

levi was the one who proposed the idea of FWB to you because he wouldn’t date you. you think it’s better this way. you’re not sure you could date him but you can definitely fuck him. downside is, he shows up to your place randomly. but you’ll never say no to him.

erwin is absolutely vile. he doesn’t care about anything. he doesn’t keep you two a secret. he lets everybody know he’s available but he also tells everyone that he’s fucking you. he has no shame. you’re his favorite, even though you’re just friends.

zeke’s…kinda needy? he’s always texting you. you think it’s endearing but honestly, you wish you two would just get together. you do everything a couple does. it’s stupid calling it fwb because you’re both in love with each other. being the idiots you are, you ignore your feelings and just have sex all the time.

porco is a fuck-boy, through and through. he has multiple fwbs. you aren’t special to him and that’s what makes it exciting. he treats you like a whore and it’s exactly what you were looking for.

jean girlies, come read my fanfiction !!

[scumbagjaeger]

omg! I love the college major one! if you're still okay with requests, how would the guys be as a study partner ?

STUDYING WITH THE SNK MEN

starring: Eren, Jean, Armin, Connie, Porco, Reiner, Levi, Zeke

rating: mostly sfw! 18+

notes: Omg thank you!!! I'm always open for requests I'm just really slow with them lol. Since I was a history/english major, most of my homework in college was papers so I kind of framed these with them helping with a paper! I also love the idea of them pining for you a touch so some of these might be more geared around that, instead of an established relationship, but I think they're pretty versatile anyway haha. Enjoy!!(:

college majors

EREN:

It's rare for him to be seen actually doing school work

So when he sends you a text inviting you to do homework together, that's exactly what he's going to do, simple enough

He's probably extremely behind in like four classes oops

Eren prefers to study in the evenings, probably after hours in the library? So there's like no one there besides the other people way behind in their classes lol

I love basketball player Eren, so he's either wearing the same big hoodie and sweats that he wore during the day, or a clean shirt and shorts, wet hair from the post-practice showers, and maybe even his gym bag

If you have plans to meet in the usual spot, he'll have your favorite energy drink waiting for you when you get there

He'd probably be super nice to study with

After practice he's extremely chill, calm, asking about your day and what not while you pull out your laptop and papers

If you ask he'll tell you about how his practice went and what he's been up to, he's tired from a long day of school and what not but he's super comfortable around you, so it's just a nice vibe

He's a good listener, remembers the names of the professors you like and the guy you hate in your class

Once you're actually really to start studying he's extremely quiet, he lets you work in peace

Honestly the sounds of his keyboard is probably so comforting? The man is good with his fingers what can I say

You might catch him sneaking glances (or full on staring) at you here and there, bright green eyes poking up from behind his laptop screen

Lowkey he's looking for any reason to talk to you again

The second you acknowledge his gaze he'll start up a small conversation again

If you need his help he'll do the thing where he leans over you a touch

He definitely saw the pink on your ears when he did it the first time and now he will never not find an excuse to be that close to you lmaooo

If you're writing a paper, he'll read it after you're done and give you feedback, but he's not good at giving it??

"Yeah, seems good to me," or "I don't get this part", he doesn't really know how to explain it or provide specific advice about how to strengthen the analysis of your evidence lol sorry

Afterwards he might put a hand on your arm and ask "So... got any plans tonight?"

Lol it's like 1am but if you're down he might take you to get ice cream, or back to his place if you want to hang out there. If not he'll offer to drive you back to your apartment, he doesn't want you walking around late at night alone :)

JEAN:

He probably sucks to study with lmao so sorry

It's just hard to get him to stop talking and actually get work done?

Your conversations start to dwindle as you begin typing on your laptop and he just changes the topic

In his defense, you guys probably find time to study together either in between your classes or immediately after, so he's just kind of distracted with everything going on

He'll invite you to do homework together and he literally thinks it means work on your essay together and like write it together

And you'll have to explain that you can do your own paper while he studies and he's like "OH okay then"

But he'll offer to help you with it anyway, which would be really nice!!

He'll read the paper once to get a feel for it, almost scans through it which makes it seem intimidating but he's just a fast reader lol

He'll explain the paper back to you???? Like he'll tell you what he's got out of the paper, your thesis and your main points; if there's any general comments or miscommunications you guys can sort that out there, he helps you frame your paper better

Then he'll help you fine tune each paragraph and make sure the evidence and analysis is solid! He's probably the best with helping you with your papers because he's super supportive and patient

When you pause to ask for his input he'll smile and give you a nudge, "Hey, you've got this. I know it's tough but you're smart, you already know the content! (Y/N), you've got this, I believe in you"

And then he gets really pink in the face "Uh, yeah. So. Onto the next paragraph?"

Sometimes you will need to tell him to focus on his own work lol

Jean with glasses. That's it

If he's writing his own paper or reading one for class they're low on his nose

Looks like a model reading, holding the book in hold hand and barely dropping his gaze down to look at it

Writing notes that are indecipherable with his other hand lol

Jean reads aloud because it helps him focus and it's really cute okay

If you're stressed or you guys are in a public/busy setting he won't! He doesn't want to be distracting

But if he's comfortable with you you might hear him whispering quietly to himself

If you offer, he'll give you some context and ask you for your input about something he's stuck on!

Remembers when your papers are due and will ask you how you did on them a week or two later!

If you're frustrated about your grade or another upcoming paper he might send you a text before your weekly study session: "change of plans. wanna catch a movie in the park? they're playing a good one :)"

ARMIN:

Armin with the double major???

He has you studying together a couple times a week AT LEAST

I bet he holds 'tutoring sessions' where he invites a bunch of friends together to study and get help from him because he can whip out a 12 page paper in two hours tops

But Connie and Ymir derail these sessions

If you guys are studying alone together he's extremely helpful

He'd love to call them private sessions with you though lowkey?? I bet if y'all were together he'd even try and roleplay some sort of tutor thing, lil freak

Studying with you is a TOP priority. This man will cancel a doctor's appointment to study with you

He'll rent you out a study room in the library!!

Armin can actually pull strings with the librarians to reserve a room last minute, if you really need one!

Study rooms are nice because they have those big whiteboards to use and he'll fill one side with "(Y/N)'S PAPER" and have you go through everything about your paper

Title, intro, thesis, paragraph topics, evidence, analysis, conclusion...

Even if you have an outline already lol he just likes to write on the whiteboard, it makes him feel important

If you're dong a worksheet or something he'll also use the whiteboard for that!

Good luck if you're writing a paper about something he's knowledgeable on?? If it's history he can literally pull evidence (like a book, author, quote and page number) out of thin air for you to use

But he might try and take over your paper oops

"(Y/N), I totally get what you're saying about Hegel's religious theories serving as a metaphor for Germany's idealized and romanticized view on their newly formed state, causing the reign of the Third Reich during the 20th century, but would you agree that this idea extends BEYOND Hegel, and in fact combines the martyrdom of the empire and their warmongering tendencies to that thought?? Just an idea :)"

He's probably the smoothest when it comes to inviting you to do something after you study

He knows your favorite coffee shop is right next to the library, or he knows of a mini golf park that's half off for students

He writes down your exam dates and paper due dates in his calendar so he can remind you and ask you how you feel afterwards!

Before a big exam he'll surprise you with something like a gift card to your favorite coffee place or a flower omg I love him

IMMEDIATELY after your class ends, your phone goes off" "How'd the exam go!! Wanna tell me about it over lunch? :)"

CONNIE:

Sorry to any business majors but all my business friends had the easiest homework ever??

Like one of them had to redesign a monopoly board for their MIDTERM, so studying with Connie is probably more like arts and crafts lmao He’ll ask you to study with him when he notices you’ve been especially stressed or down

Connie’s got a real good skill at reading people I bet but he doesn’t show it?

He’ll check in occasionally but it can also be overwhelming when someone’s constantly looming over you while you’re stressed so he doesn’t do that!

But right in the heat of your semester, you’ve got like five different papers and projects due and you get a text from Connie saying he’s on his way to your apartment with food and a project

He makes some dumb excuse about needing to borrow some tape or something

He brings your favorite takeout and lightly forces you to eat it, put your books down and think about something else for ten minutes!

He points out that you’ll do your best work when you’re healthy and gives you a look

You guys probably study in silence for a bit before he finally breaks the tension

"So... stressed much?"

He'll let you rant to him about all of your classes, about your parents pressuring you, about how you're scared you're pushing away your friends by closing yourself off but you NEED to, everything

You'll feel him at your side, his hand rubbing your back gently

"(Y/N), you're like the smartest person I know. You don't have to prove anything to anyone about that. You're friends all know that exams are hectic, so you don't need to worry about us! I just worry about you when you stop taking care of yourself, (Y/N). So... let me take care of you, yeah? We'll get through this."

All-nighters aren't probably the healthiest thing, but Connie makes them fun and you guys are able to get through them without two pots of coffee

He let's you explain everything about your projects and he'll play devil's advocate a little bit during your essay, just asking you simple questions that you should answer in your paper. "--But why is that important?" and "--What about any opposing arguments?"

If you're memorizing terms for a quiz, he's making it a game, rewarding you with chocolate chips or something dumb whenever you ace your flashcards

Honestly he'd end up learning all of your terms too? I think a good way to learn something is to explain it to someone else (or just talk through it at least), so as you go through your terms and their definitions he is slowly starting to memorize them? He may not seem like the most studious person but he's definitely a quick learner

He also forces you to take breaks when you're starting to get overwhelmed though, which is also how you guys do his projects lol. "Why don't you put down your laptop and give yourself some space from your essay. Help me color in this poster and then we can look at your paper with fresh eyes, yeah?"

By the time your paper is done and your terms are all memorized, it's 4am and the sun is starting to peek through the tree line, and only then do you start to feel the weight of your overnight study session. Connie does too, and he nods towards your bedroom where you both collapse onto your mattress

"Don't go to class today," "What?" "C'mon, you need to sleep, you've got all your projects done, your paper is perfect, you need to sleep." and as he's pulling you towards him, rubbing your back, who are you to decline that offer?

Porco:

I feel like Porco is also very down-to-business, like Eren

Which can be extremely nice? He's very disciplined, so studying with him is perfect when you procrastinate too much and NEED to get your shit done

He probably gives you shit for procrastinating lol, sorry he just doesn't understand how you could do that to yourself?

He's an extremely busy guy, to the point where homework is probably fun for him, because it's the only thing he can really control (compared to his soccer practice and work schedule, that has set times)

Like he can get homework in class and then get it done immediately after, while the content is still fresh in his mind, and then his afternoon is free

So if you ask him to study with you sometime he might look at you a little funny because he doesn't really need to study that often?

But he's also a gentleman so he'll agree, inviting you over to his place sometime after soccer practice

He might save some homework to do in the evening with you, or he'll just sit there with a blank word document across from you because all of his homework is done LMAOO

But let's be real he'd never pass up a chance to spend some alone time with you

Love Porco to pieces but he's probably a bit dense when it comes to talking to people one on one?? Like people he's interested in

"Yeah, all the boys are playing COD right now and they want me to join but I said I had to study with you ://"

But then when you tell him that he can go play if he's done with his homework he's like "no shut up, stupid. I want to help you"

He'd lowkey be such a parent-type friend when it comes to studying at his apartment, like he has a dinky little platter of like vegetables out because it's good brain food, what a dork

You can convince him to order a pizza if you end up needing to stay later, and he orders your favorite toppings without you having to tell you what they are

"When Sasha and Niccolo hosted that make-your-own pizza thing two months ago, that's what you put on your pizza so I just figured that's what you liked I don't know"

When you ask him how much you owe him he just rolls his eyes. "Shut up and get back to writing your paper, dummy"

At one point he asks you how many pages your essay needs to be he is shocked??? He thought it was like a three page paper, so when you tell him it needs to be a minimum of twenty four pages he dies a little bit

"People have to write papers that long???" He might even call the pizza place back and order a dessert, paying the delivery charge and tipping a driver again just because he really had no idea that's why you were so stressed

You can definitely get him to take your mind off of studying by asking him about something relating to soccer or his family and he does not realize that you're doing it to get your mind off of your work, he's just happy to talk to you lol

Reiner:

He'd probably be similar to Porco in that he gets most of his homework done like right after class, it just makes more sense to him to do it that way

Like the content is fresh in his mind and then he doesn't have to worry about it

If it's a paper or something he just goes to the library immediately after class and gets lost in his research and then a couple hours later he leaves with at least half of it done, does the rest the next day

But I'm sure he still gets super stressed out about all his work

So when you ask him to study with you he's totally down, he could always review his notes for the 18th time!

When Reiner does need to study he cram studies in the most unhealthy way?? I bet he had a really healthy and disciplined way of studying in high school, but something about college and his anxiety just caused all of that academic discipline to go out the window

He could have a paper due in two months and if he puts it off for a day he starts to beat himself up over it :(

Still a good student obviously!! Just doesn't take care of himself as kindly as he should

When you guys study together it's different, because he'd hate to encourage you to treat yourself the same way he treats himself

You guys go and get lunch together before you study and he pays (duh), and he even suggests that you guys go on a walk or something before actually settling down to study

Maybe you talk about the work you need to done to plan what you need to get done today, what you can afford to put off until the next day, etc

Or maybe you talk about something else entirely, just about how nice the weather is! You both end up feeling refreshed and ready to get started once you make your way to the library

Since he's going to school for education he's probably extremely helpful when it comes to memorizing your terms and concepts

He'll make flash cards for the both of you with your respective content and you guys take turns quizzing each other

Unrelated but I bet he has decent handwriting?? But when he makes the flashcards for you both he makes sure it's all super neat and perfect, gets weirdly paranoid about misspelling a word or his handwriting looking bad, causing you to misspell a word on your exam day??

"Reiner, trust me, you're already helping me so much, I appreciate all you do for me!"

His face just goes bright red and he nods, unable to speak so he just goes back to making more flashcards

He'll print out your essay once you're done with it, paying the $0.94 per page charge for each draft, so he can highlight and annotate it for you

You explain to him that he can just edit it on his laptop but he refuses, he thinks he will do a better job editing with the hard copy in hand

Will 100% take you to get ice cream again once you guys are done studying, to recap how you did, whether you got done the stuff that you set out to, and plan another study date hangout

Levi:

I feel like Levi would be really intense when it comes to studying?

Like he just looks extremely focused in on his work, so it might seem like he's angry when you invite him to study with you in the library

But he insists that you go to his apartment instead. The library is going to be full of students trying to get their work done, and he can even cook for you afterwards, if you'd like

He writes down his apartment address and you agree to meet there at 3 o'clock sharp

When you get to his apartment there's classical music playing, he already has his laptop on with like four open books next to him so he can work on his literature paper

If you're also working on an English paper he has dozens of anthologies for you to borrow, if you're looking for a specific one he'll go to his bedroom (where he has a massive bookshelf) and will pull it out for you

"Bartleby the Scrivener? By Melville, yes? Hm, I think I have that in my seventh edition, let me--" and without waiting for response he's gone, and then he's back moments later with a massive text in his hand. He'll flip to it in the anthology and he'll set it on the table for you, "here, I've even annotated my copy"

Actually if you ask him to help you write your paper he would also be really helpful?? Very direct with it, but as long as you know that going into it, it's fine lol

I love the idea of him being a graduate student who teaches an undergrad/Intro to English Studies course, so he's extremely comfortable with helping you with your papers, even if they're not about English!

In group settings he can be really intense, and even though he's still extremely direct one-on-one, he is patient with you, and understanding as you explain what confuses you about your assignment

If you are going into this study session hoping for it to be a date of some sort, prepare to be disappointed because this man keeps his academics and his love life separate lol

Until he hears your stomach grumble!!

The second he does, he shuts his laptop and makes his way towards the kitchen to start dinner

"You can't do your best work on an empty stomach, and the noise will be distracting anyway," lmaoo

If you offer to help out he'll take it, maybe suggesting you prepare the vegetables while he makes the pasta sauce

He might brush a hand against the small of your back to signal you of his presence while reaching over to grab something next to you?? Like a spice or something

While you cook together, he'll ask you how your day was, he might even offer to pour you a glass of wine, so long as it doesn't spoil your appetite

He might smack your hand away from snacking on the vegetables you cook, but will also accept if you try and feed him one-- "to see if it's seasoned properly"!!

Levi would think about the taste for a second, humming with approval before turning back to focus on his entrée with a tinge of pink dusting his cheeks.

He will keep up this flirty energy all throughout dinner, but the second the dishes are washed and put away, he is opening up his laptop and going back to work, straight faced as ever oops

Zeke:

So cocky?? For no reason?? Someone put this man in a time out

"So you need my help, hm? I guess I can take a peek at your paper."

Even if you just ask to study with him, he's going to assume you need his help

Which can be nice if you're stubborn or have a hard time asking for help (like me lol)

He's extremely observant, so the moment you begin to reread a paragraph to see how to improve it, he's at your side. "Okay, what's the problem here"

He can tell by the way you furrow your brows, or the way you begin to read aloud quietly to yourself!! The man doesn't even understand why he's so lasered-in on you, he's basically studying you while you study lmao

I will always headcanon him as being a coach for a little league baseball team in his hometown, and he does most of his own homework on the train ride there and back

So when you ask him to study with you he's usually not doing much himself anyway, just there to help you out

Maybe he'll bring some papers to grad from the class he's TA'ing for, because he wants to show off a little bit hahahah

He'll even invite you to the classroom that he TA's in, because he knows that it's going to be empty by the time you finish your last class

Similar to Reiner, he'd prefer to edit your paper with a hard copy so he can 'grade it' with the rest of his undergrad essays, but he'll send you to the printer down the hall with his credit card, might even tell you to pick out something from the vending machine for yourself (they say chivalry is dead)

He's also extremely thorough though when editing your paper, gets so quiet that it's almost scary, but he's super encouraging and helpful with all of his notes, even just rewriting things for you in red ink in the margins

After he's finished he'll go through his revisions with you so that you understand why his rewrite of your thesis is stronger, more concise, so that in the future you know how to do it yourself

Not that he doesn't love to help you! But he wants you to learn the stuff

Honestly if he's helping you learn terms or remember concepts he is also using a whiteboard like Armin lol

I think Zeke would want to be a surgeon or oncologist to follow in his dad's footsteps, but I think he'd have a real gift for teaching and should go into that instead, he could teach one of his little league kiddos medical terminology and have them pass a test he's that good at teaching people

Talks with his hands a lot while he's explaining concepts to you, circles phrases and draws arrows connecting them to other ideas, basically acts as if he's a professor giving a lecture to you lol but it's okay because he looks hot doing it xoxo

He won't say much once you nail your practice term quiz or show him your final draft of your paper, just nod and give a little "hm, not bad, (Y/L/N)"

But deep down I think he'd be going crazy because Zeke loves an intelligent and competent partner?? I mean don't get me wrong he'd probably like someone less intelligent than him so he can a) feel better about himself and b) manipulate them without them knowing, but he'd be kind of speechless once he's aware of your intelligence and his heart is racing a little bit?? He doesn't realize he's experiencing feelings for the first time hahaha

For that reason, once you are done studying he is like "okay bye" and he is gone in like two seconds UNLESS you start up a conversation with him about little league, then you may be able to convince him to walk you back to your apartment (who's being manipulated now, Zeke)

AHH I'm so sorry this took so long!!! I hope you liked them!! My next set of headcanons is going to be some meet-cute scenarios that I think would lead to your relationship with the guys respectively, so this was tough!! I was torn between it being an established relationship or them kind of crushing on you/a study date-not-date type of thing?? But I really hope you liked them and I appreciate your patience with me :)

[jrob64]

A Love/Hate Relationship - a CS modern AU one-shot

I wrote this story because I was in need of fluff, humor and hurt/comfort after the painful experience of losing two dogs in less than a year. Zeke, who was in my story Sowing Seeds of Trust, died of cancer last June. Two months later, we adopted Winston, who was the main character in Pet for Rent. Somehow, he swallowed part of a brush (while he wasn't at home) which perforated his intestines and caused internal bleeding. He died May 23. Writing my favorite trope for my favorite couple is therapeutic for me as I deal with my heartbreak.

Many thanks to @kmomof4 and @hookedmom.

Summary: Killian Jones' neighbor, Emma Swan, has hated him since the first day they met. When she finds out he came down with the flu and attempts to nurse him back to health, he's more than a little confused.

Rating: T

Words: 2582

Also posted to ffn and Ao3

Story is under the cut

*********

Killian Jones buried his face in a pillow and pulled it up over his head in an attempt to stop the incessant pounding. After several painful moments, he realized the noise wasn’t in his head, but was coming from the front door of his apartment.

Groaning, he tossed back the covers and swung his legs over the side of the bed, sitting with his head in his hands for a short while. When he finally got to his feet, he swayed dizzily and stumbled into the door frame, leaning against it to try to regain his balance.

He eventually made his way across the living room, unlocked the deadbolt and threw the door open. “What?” he demanded loudly, regretting it immediately when a sharp pain shot behind his eyes. He squeezed them shut before even registering who was on the other side of the door.

“Jones, how many times do I have to tell you to…Wow! You look like hell.”

Killian cracked his eyes open enough to see his neighbor from across the hall, Emma Swan. Infuriating to the highest degree and just as beautiful, she was the last person he wanted to see while he was in his current state. The two of them had a love/hate relationship…minus the love.

They had gotten off on the wrong foot when he moved in a little over a year ago. Unaware that she was a police officer who worked the night shift, he woke her up shouting orders at the movers. Emma Swan was not a morning person, especially after working an eight hour shift on the streets of Boston, and she informed him of it in no uncertain terms.

After that day, every interaction between them was filled with tension and snarkiness. Killian wished they could go back to when they met and start over again, because he knew she was basing her hatred of him on that first impression. In all honesty, he was quite intrigued by the fierce blonde and would like to know if there was a sweet or funny side of her she kept hidden very deep inside. Very, very deep.

Now she was here, standing at his door, scrutinizing him like a bug squashed on the bottom of her shoe. “Hangover?” she smirked.

He sighed. “I have the flu, Swan. It’s been going around at the office and I wasn’t lucky enough to avoid it. Now, if you’re done yelling at me, is there something I can help you with? If not, I’d really like to go back to bed.”

She took a step forward and unexpectedly pressed her palm to his forehead, then both hands to his unshaven cheeks. “You’ve got a fever.”

“Usually accompanies the flu. Now if you’ll…”

“Do you have medicine?”

“No, I…”

“Have you eaten? Are you drinking plenty of fluids?”

“I haven’t…”

“How long have you had it? Have you seen a doctor?”

Killian rested his pounding head against the door. “Must you use your interrogation techniques on me? I haven’t committed a crime, you know.”

“I’m trying to help,” she said, clearly offended.

“I could use less help and more sleep,” he grumbled.

“Yes, good,” she said, pushing past him into his apartment. “Go back to bed and I’ll get you something to drink. Do you want water, juice or…”

“More questions, Swan? Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

“All you have to drink is water, Dr. Pepper Zero and beer?” she asked, peering into his refrigerator. Closing it, she straightened up and began opening cupboards. “Do you have tea bags? British people like to drink tea, don’t they?”

He knew it would hurt his head to roll his eyes, so he simply threw up his hands and trudged off to his bedroom. Behind him, he could hear Emma celebrating the fact that she’d located the tea bags.

He had just gotten back to sleep, when he was shaken awake. “What now?” he growled, flopping onto his back.

“I made some tea and found Advil in your medicine cabinet. You need to drink something and get these pills in you.”

He raised his head and blinked up at her blearily. “You went through my medicine cabinet?”

“Yeah. Did you know condoms have an expiration date? The ones you have in there expired almost two years ago. Better not use them, because they’re likely to break.”

“Ugh,” he groaned, letting his head drop back down on his pillow. “Please just let me die.”

“You aren’t gonna die from the flu, Jones.”

“I meant from embarrassment,” he muttered under his breath.

“Sit up,” she commanded, sliding her arm under his pillow and pushing until he did as he was told.

First, she handed him a bottle of water. After glaring at her for several seconds, he finally took it, then swiped the two pills she held in her other palm. He popped them into his mouth and downed them with the water.

“Happy now?” he asked.

“Deliriously,” she quipped. “Now drink your tea.”

He accepted the mug she offered him and held it to his lips. Cautiously taking a sip, he grimaced and spit it back into the cup. “Did you heat the water at all? It’s barely warm! And how bloody much sugar did you put in it?”

“Well, I didn’t want you to burn your mouth,” she explained haughtily. “And I put in the same amount of sugar as I put in my coffee. Four spoonfuls.”

“Four?” he questioned. “Are you trying to kill me, or just give me diabetes?”

“You’re not a very good patient, Jones. You could at least be grateful that I’m helping you.”

“If you recall, I didn’t ask for your help.”

She ignored him, fluffing his pillow and pushing at his chest to get him to lay back down. “I found a can of chicken noodle soup in your cupboard. I’m going to heat it up.”

“Don’t add any sugar to it,” he groused, as she walked out of the bedroom, taking the tepid cup of tea with her.

“I heard that,” she threw over her shoulder.

“Of course she heard that, but didn’t hear when I told her to leave me alone,” he mumbled into his pillow. He tossed and turned, knowing that if he went to sleep, the maddening woman would just wake him up again.

Sure enough, she was back at his bedside within ten minutes, carefully carrying a plate containing a steaming bowl of soup and a small stack of saltine crackers. He sat up before she could order him to, and took the plate from her.

“You didn’t add anything to this, did you?” he asked.

“Nope, I just heated it up,” she assured him.

He dipped the spoon into the soup, blew on it and put it in his mouth, then promptly choked and sputtered. “Bloody hell, Swan! Didn’t you add any water to this?”

“Why would I add water?” she asked, a confused frown forming on her face.

“Because Campbell’s soup is condensed. It’s too salty this way. Adding extra water dilutes it enough that it tastes like soup is supposed to taste, rather than tasting like…like the ocean. Haven’t you ever made soup from a can before?”

“Sure,” she said, crossing her arms across her chest petulantly. “I make Progresso soup all the time, but I never add water to it.”

“Progresso soup isn’t condensed. This is.” He took the stack of crackers, then thrust the plate back towards her. “I’ll just eat these, thanks very much. Now that you’ve tended to me, you can leave me in peace.”

“Are you sure you’re gonna be okay?” she asked.

Was that concern he saw on her face? Surely not. Emma Swan would never be concerned about him. It would be more realistic if she were to try to poison him. Perhaps he should have been more careful eating and drinking what she gave him.

Shaking his head slightly to try to clear those thoughts, he said gruffly, “Yes, I’m sure. It’s not like you really helped anyway.”

This time, he thought he saw a flash of hurt cross her face, before she turned and left the room. Soon he heard the front door close.

He couldn’t have really seen Emma Swan look concerned and hurt, could he? Great. Now he was going to have to add hallucinations to his list of symptoms.

He ate the crackers, then lay down and turned onto his side, tugging the blanket up around his shoulders. He was achy and feverish, but it was the guilt over how he treated his apparently well-meaning neighbor that kept him from falling asleep.

*********

Three days later, after his fever had been broken for twenty-four hours, Killian went back to work. Upon returning home at the end of the day and getting his keys out to unlock his apartment, the door across the hall opened and Emma stepped out.

“Oh, hey Jones. Looks like you recovered, no thanks to me.”

Killian rubbed his finger behind his ear. “I owe you an apology, Swan. I was rude and should have never said what I did.”

She shrugged nonchalantly. “It’s no big deal. I guess I’ll never be a Florence Nightingale.” Turning on her heel, she muttered, “See ya around.”

“Swan…Emma, wait,” he called out, hurrying after her.

She turned around. “What?” she huffed.

“I, uh, I truly am sorry. It was very kind of you to try to help me, but…”

“But what?”

“But why did you do that? I mean, given the fact you hate me…”

“I don’t hate you,” she interrupted.

“Really? You could have fooled me.”

Emma stuck her hands in the back pockets of her jeans and looked down at the floor for several long moments. When she finally looked up, he was shocked to see the vulnerability on her face.

“Look… I’m not good with…people,” she said softly. “And I’m also not good at admitting when I’m wrong.”

She paused and he waited patiently, wondering where she was going with this.

“None of the people I know would be concerned enough to check on me if I called in sick to work. You’ve lived here long enough for me to realize that…that you don’t seem to have anyone like that, either. I never see anyone coming or going on a regular basis - besides the pizza delivery guy, but I don’t think he counts.”

Killian chuckled dryly. “You’re very observant, Swan.” He paused for a moment, debating whether he should open up to her as she was to him. “And you’re also correct,” he added finally. “I moved here from England when I was transferred for my job, and I don’t have any close friends yet.”

She nodded. “I figured it was something like that. The day you moved in, I was…well, to put it bluntly, I was a bitch. And, as I said, I’m not good at apologizing, so I just let things go on being…uncomfortable. When I saw that you were sick the other day, I thought it was my chance to make things better between us, but I screwed that up, too. I just…I guess I wanted to let you know that you didn’t have to be alone while you were suffering - that there was someone who cared. I…I’m sorry I made things worse.”

“You didn’t make things worse,” he assured her. “I appreciate the effort. Actually, if you think about it, it was really quite comical.”

She scoffed. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“And they do say laughter is the best medicine, so your failed attempts at helping are probably what cured me so quickly.”

Seeing the grin on his face, the corners of her own mouth turned up a bit. “You’re an idiot, Jones.”

He took a step closer. “How about if we start over, Emma? It would be nice to have a friend living across the hall.”

She eyed him, chewing her lip in contemplation. Then she held her hand out to him. “Hi, I’m Emma Swan. Welcome to the neighborhood.”

He reached forward to give her hand a firm shake. “Killian Jones. Pleasure to meet you, Miss Swan.”

She smiled and he was amazed at how it transformed her already lovely face. They stood awkwardly for several moments, until Killian said, “Well, I should let you go. Were you on your way to work?”

“Oh, uh, no. I was just going to get something to eat.”

He rubbed his hand along his jaw, dropping his eyes as he asked, “Would you, um…would you like some company?” Looking back up, he saw her eyes widen and hurried to add, “Just as a friend. As you well know, I don’t have much to eat in my apartment.”

She snorted out a laugh. “You still have more than I do at my place.” Turning away from him once again, she said, “If you’re sure, you’re welcome to join me. I was just gonna go to the diner around the corner. Tonight’s special is grilled cheese and onion rings.”

“Ah, greasy diner food,” he said, beginning to follow her. “You do know if you keep eating that stuff, your arteries are going to be filled with sludge.”

She chose to ignore him as she started down the stairs. “They have the best hot chocolate, too.”

“How much sugar do you add to it?” he grinned.

She glared at him over her shoulder. “No sugar, just cinnamon.”

“Cinnamon in hot chocolate? Sounds…interesting.”

She stopped on the landing and turned to look at him. “If you’re gonna make fun of my preferences for food and drink, you’re uninvited.”

Holding his hands up in mock surrender, he said, “I meant no offense, Swan. Perhaps I’ll even give your…unique concoction a try.”

That meal led to another, and many more. Soon they added regular coffee dates. Gradually, at Killian’s urging, Emma tried and eventually acquired a taste for black coffee, no sugar. Even more gradually, at Emma’s urging, Killian acquired a taste for greasy diner food.

Six weeks after Emma’s attempt to nurse Killian back to health, they went on their first official date. Killian was very happy to discover that Emma Swan did indeed have both a sweet and funny side. They realized they had many things in common, as they talked during their dinner at one of Boston’s most renowned restaurants, then walked along the waterfront.

At the conclusion of the date, they shared a kiss outside her apartment door, which opened both of their eyes to the fact that there was a significant spark of attraction between them. As they continued to date, the spark ignited into a blazing flame. (They made sure to replace the expired condoms in Killian’s medicine cabinet, once it was obvious they were going to put them to use.)

They became each other’s ‘person’ - someone to laugh with, cry with, share everything with, and nurse back to health when the need arose. By the following winter, when the flu made its way through Killian’s office once again, he had his own live-in nurse, whose skills were much improved from the previous year.

By that time, they still had a love/hate relationship…but now, it was minus the hate.

*********

A couple of fun notes:

-Colin was drinking a Dr. Pepper Zero during the Meet & Greet I went to at GalaxyCon in Columbus last year.

-At another con several years ago, Jen admitted she never drank black coffee until Colin got her hooked on it. (No pun intended!)

*********

Thank you for reading.

Tagging:

@qualitycoffeethings @grimmswan @cs-rylie @wyntereyez @kmomof4 @hookedmom @ultraluckycatnd @paradiselady19 @xarandomdreamx @motherkatereloyshipper @lfh1226-linda

@pawshapedheart @vampcoffeegyrl23 @tiganasummertree @bluewildcatfanatic @eleveneitherway @elfiola @kday426

@julieenchanted-swans @gingerchangeling @andiirivera @djlbg @jonesfandomfanatic @snowbellewells @anmylica @booksteaandtoomuchtv @cocohook38 @ilovemesomekillianjones

@zaharadessert @lyssapup27 @undercaffinatednightmare @winterbaby89 @jennjenn615 @xsajx @jackieorioncat @teamhook @soniccat @jarienn972 @softkilly @kymbersmith-90 @apiratewhopines

@hollyethecurious @laianely @resident-of-storybrooke @exhaustedpirate @caught-in-the-filter @stahlop @veryverynotgoodwrites @darkshadow7 @fleurdepetite @whimsicallyenchantedrose @earanemith @superchocovian @idristardis @captainswan-kellie @beckettj

[theepisceswriter]

Dominating/ Pegging AOT men pt. 1 (Reiner & Zeke)

A/N: another request from my stoned thot anon, blessing us all with their request ideas. WE FUCKING MEN IN THE ASS ALL 2023!!!

TW: mommy kink for Reiner, Power bottom meanie Zeke, and your usual freaky shit, 18+

REINER

Bye, why wouldn't the king of mommy kink allow you to dom and peg him!?!?!? If anything, HE'S the one who introduced the idea of you being something like a dominatrix for him and you were more than happy to comply. It fits the natural dynamic of your relationship too well.

The very first night the two of you incorporated it in the bedroom he was a moaning pink flustered mess underneath you and you were so wet that the strap kept shifting out of place. From then on the two of you knew it was going to be a staple in the bedroom.

He thoroughly enjoys allowing you to have access to him in such a vulnerable way and how good you make him feel.

"Thank you so much mommy for fucking me so good, you make me feel so good", "No one else could ever make me feel as good as you do, mommy. No one.", "You fuck and treat me so well, I can't wait until it's my turn to put my cock in you and make you feel just as good."

He looks absolutely angelic during all this nasty dirty talk; eyes doe and slightly teary, cheeks rosy and tear-stained, and gazing up at you with nothing but pure adoration.

You two indulge in all types of gadgets and positions to keep things spicy and not boring. Both of you guys' favorite position is missionary. There's something about you being able to see Reiner's face contort with pleasure while you're deep into him and stroking his cock that stirs up something feral in you. And he enjoys watching you just as much.

This man's stamina is like a horse's. As soon as you're done fucking him and making sure he reaches his climax, he's on you like bees on honey. He wastes no time in pounding you with his cock even if he was satisfied from the night already, your pleasure is equally as important to him and he won't stop until he's sure that you're just as satisfied as him. Even if he is tired.

His favorite way to thank you is by letting you sit on his face and use his tongue as you please. He'll lift you on his face right after you're done fucking him, it's his favorite to wiggle his tongue through the straps of the strap-on and find your sweet swollen clit to suck on like a pacifier.

Best believe the aftercare is A1 too. The best pillow talk and cuddling sessions to exist in history.

ZEKE

Zeke won’t let you full-on peg him, but I can see him being into less intense butt stuff like rimming or even letting you put a finger or two up there for added sensation but that's as far as that goes for him.

BUT, He does like giving you control in the bedroom every now and then because it's amusing to him that you think you can even do that.

P O W E R BOTTOM THROUGH AND TRUE. This man is a verbal sadistic

"You really think you can fuck me better than I can fuck you", "So cute seeing those dainty fingers try and work my hole when you can barely get them to wrap around my cock", "I could flip you over right now and have you under me faster than you can get a moan out."

Nights when he allows you to take control always end up being the most frustrating ones because he's cocky as hell and doesn't shut up. His comebacks are too quick and witty for you to think of faster ones as a baby dom, but you're getting there. All this egging on and torment is really just to turn you into his perfect dom. He wants you to mean it when you tell him to shut up and make you cum 3 times in a row or he won't come at all. It's your aggressiveness and frustration with him that really turns him on.

The more comfortable you two get with this arrangement the more you find out how crazy humiliation makes him. One night you said something along the lines of, "No wonder you won't let me peg you; this pathetic hole couldn't take a fake cock even if it wanted to." THE MAN WAS TOO STUNNED TO SPEAK BUT WHEW ! I don't think he even knew that he enjoyed humiliation that much and you knew he loved it from the way his cheeks turned the same color as the tip of his cock and not to mention the precum that was flowing down his shaft like a river.

Your rim jobs have a tranquilizing effect on him and he requests one almost every time he gets oral from you. Feeling the hot warm muscle that is your tongue poke and prod at the most sensitive and fleshy part of his body leaves him gripping the edge of the bed until his knuckles turn white.

It's your favorite sight; Him with his mouth slightly agape, chest vibrating with groans, and his t-shirt slightly pushed up farther on his abdomen revealing the muted gold happy trail leading to his dick. And you being the demon that you are, of course you add in a handjob that has him shooting strings of cum on his stomach when he reaches his climax.

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

Hi Josi 😊 For the Top 5 BL: Best Hug and / or Most Beloved Sidecouples ✨

Uuhhhh, two in one! Maxine, thank you for this ask ❤

I love a good hug. Seeing those feels like I get a hug (and sometimes it makes me feel really single). There are the hugs that you can feel through your screen, some of them you just want to look away, because this moment belongs only to the couple on screen, they are just so intimate and there are so ones where one wants to crawl into the other one and I am here for this kind of hug. This desperate need for each others closeness.

The start makes the oldest one on this list:

My School President

Their hugs just felt so good! I loved giffing those moments. They needed the other one physical close, they felt peace in those hugs and it was their way to show how much they cared for each other. I loved every single one of those hugs!

I just realised the next ones are all just some really desperate hugs... and I love them! I have a thing for them...

Kiseki: Dear To Me

This hug felt so good. Finally they were reunited again. Finally they could hold each other again. And damn this was such a beautiful hug! They hugged with their whole body and soul. Imagine holding the love of your life finally in your arms again after years of spending apart. I love it!

Tokyo In April Is...

There is no space for anything else between them. Kazuma made sure of that. He neeeded Ren to feel this hug, and for himself to feel this closeness again. Both are in love with each other, even though they couldn't tell each other yet, but for us viewers it was cristal clear. This hug alone made it clear for us. I love this hug so much!

Pit Babe

Yes Babe, cry because you're so happy to have Charlie back in your arms! Beautiful. I needed this, he needed this and Charlie needed this too! We all needed this! And I love Pavel's facial expressions in this moment.

I Feel You Linger I The Air

The most desperate hug after the most saddest fuck this year! Such a beautiful scene! They knew they didn't have much time left and just made love. They wanted and needed to feel every inch of each other, and it felt so intimate, I had the urge to look away and let them have this time alone in closeness and happiness and desperation.

And now after these beautiful scenes we go on to my favorite side couples 2023. I love a good side couple I can concentrate on and forget about the main couple 😅

The first couple is one of the most precious ones of this year. We knew them and we knew they had incredibly chemistry and could act really nice, but nevertheless they blew us away:

Heart and LiMing from Moonlight Chicken

Their story was so wholesome and important. Their journey was so good. LiMing's struggles with his mum and his uncle, the money and the fact that he wanted to see the world were so ordinary and felt so real it was so good. And Heart's problems with his parents and the urge to be more independent and to be seen felt so sad and Gemini was so good. Oh I love these two and their stories!

Next we have a show I didn't like that much, but I was in love with the side couple. They were the only reason why I kept up with this show.

Zeke and Fifth from My Story

They had an extreme intense chemistry. I loved them on screen and their journey to finally become a couple. I was hyped for their own show and was so let down. I couldn't watch it. It was too much cringe for me, but this is just personal preference. In My Story I adored them and this scene especially.

Next is the couple, that has the most entries in all of my Top 5s this year:

AiDi and ChenYi from Kiseki: Dear To Me

I love them. They stole the show and my heart. Their dynamic is so adorable after they finally become a thing. In the beginning I was a little put off. I didn't understand their relationship, but within a few episodes this changed I was rooting for them so much! I was so happy when ChenYi finally understood his feelings for AiDi and AiDi finally got what he wanted desperatley for years!

I don't know if the next one counts... The show has three couples and I guess one was the main couple. Well, I cared more about the other ones.

Love Class 2

Maru and Minwoo had the softest kiss this year in my opinion and Sungmin and Joohyuk had this lap-situation and everything else that came after. I really enjoyed their stories and their characters. The main couple was just not that interesting for me. But because of the side couples (or the other main couples) I enjoyed this series so much!

I close this list with a couple, that is a little bit problematic for me. I don't like the series that much, mostly because of the main couple and the bad writing for them. But the writing for this side couple was so much worse!

Jaab and Jane from Step By Step

I was so pissed with their ending! What was that? There was no real conclusion and I still don't know if they are happy together now. They had this huge cheating plot (and I like those tropes, but only with a good solution in the end) and before they could work on that Jane was never seen again. This was so sturpid, I was so angry. I wanted them to have their own stupid happily ever after, but no, we have some creepy stalker like behavior and some mystery... no thank you, but besides that I liked them so much and I wanted so much more of them!

Ask me Top 5 BL Anything from 2023

[unordinary-diary]

Ooh can we hear about the band au for the Unordinary ask game?

oh yes this is one of my favorites!

Band AU

Okay so for this one I actually have stuff written down for it already. Copy/pasted from my notes is their roles in the band:

Arlo: Manager and synth player

Blyke: Drummer

Isen: songwriter, PR guy, and assorted behind-the-scenes tasks

John: backup singer & bassist 

Remi: electric guitar player

Seraphina: Lead singer

Arlo as the manager mostly because I can’t see him not taking the leadership role, and synth player because my brother and I thought piano fit his vibes but we swapped it when we decided it was a rock band. Isen’s behind the scenes because I imagine him staying out of the spotlight. John is on bass mostly because bass strings are really hard to break, and therefore really dramatic to have him break one in the heat of whatever dramatic climax moment there is.

I also wrote a little mock ao3 summary for the au:

Rei’s band was selected to participate in an upscale, annual music event, with a chance to win a lot of money. It’s a tournament style competition for which they have a year to prepare X amount of songs. Not only do they have the chance to win money, but it’s an incredible opportunity to get their names out there, and winning could even make their whole career. Unfortunately, Rei dies before the competition, leaving the rest of the band grief-stricken. Arlo steps up as the manager, and Remi as the singer.

“I can’t do it,” said Remi.

“What?” Arlo asked.

“I’m telling you while there’s still time. I can’t sing and play at the same time with out screwing up one or the other. We have to find another singer.”

Or: Seraphina and John audition for a band.

I also wrote out the start of a plot outline but it’s in word vomit format so I’m not posting it like that. Something that definitely happens though is that Zeke and his cronies are also competing, and they play dirty and try to sabotage our main characters. Also they definitely play a tribute song for Rei.

This one is… probably the most developed au I have? Ive got a vague plot, even. Really this only exists because I thought their abilities could make really cool effects for a concert.

[totaldrama-showdowns]

Unused Submissions for the Favorite Rivalry Showdown!

justin and trent

please im so tired of seeing fluffy ship art of them THEY DO NOT LIKE EACH OTHER

justin literally got him eliminated i cant imagine they had a good relationship after action

"one time justin threw a tambourine at me and that kinda hurt >:|"

THE GUITAR SNATCH AND GLARE IN CELEBRITY MANHUNT

you know they had the nastiest most jawdropping arguments in the recording room during drama brothers recording sessions

uhh yeah they hate each other they should get to fight to the death as a treat

Alejandro and duncan

they're perfect

Scax

is this a rivalry? idk

Dave vs Leonard

IT'S ME! I DON'T BELIEVE IN YOU! NOW PICK UP THE PIG!

Lindsay vs Courtney

it was brief but it was enjoyable

Izzy and Justin

They're sooo funny, especially cause they're exes

Julia vs Priya

I don’t actually think this is the best one I’m just putting it here because we need more reboot characters in this bracket

Whatever Lindsay and Beth had with Heather after Island

you go girls

Geoff and Trent

hockey bros vs birds

why do they get beat up by birds so frequently

Dawn and Scott

Ok sure they lasted for two scenes but THEY COULD'VE BEEN SUCH GOOD RIVALS MAN

Julia vs Every Other TD '23 Blonde

Nominating this because I think it's funny

Julia and Caleb

I don’t actually gaf about them but i like when julia hit him with a frying pan or something

the roti writers and gen 2 female characters

they did them so dirty :(

bowie vs straight people

he's seen enough

chris vs blaineley

divorced enemies sweep

lightning vs cameron

it was ooc but it kinda slayed

Chris and Sierra

The New York episode. Please Chris should've been a hater the whole season and Sierra wouldn't notice it would be funny. See my vision

Ezekiel Vs Death

I just know Death keeps snapping those bony fingers any time Ezekiel escapes death

Emma and Julia

white on white violence

Terry and Chref

We saw that tweet

Mal and Julia

Mal plays the game really well and Julia's getting insecure. But I have faith Julia will triumph

Marmaduke and Garfield

I love tti

Me vs Blaineley

We are currently fighting over who gets 2 date Kelly (I'm winning)

larry v chef

chef’s gotta defend his man what can I say

Everyone (- Priya) Vs Caleb

He literally has no friends.

priya's personality versus the writers

season 2. need I say more?

Heather Vs Blaineley

I cannot tell you how funny it is that Blaineley turned up to the TD jumbo jet and chose violence against a girl half her age

Ezekiel and Chris

demolish that monster zeke

Sky vs Dave

He tried to kill her I think this counts as a rivalry at least a little bit

Damien vs Millie

Yeah! The finish line!

Duncney

toxic yaoi

Noah anf Harold

autism on autism violence and we love that

do alejandro and noah count,,, if not im voting leshawna and heather

brainrot says so

jasmine and shawn

just being a hater here, they were much more tolerable (but still crappy) when she hated him over them being a couple

dramarama ella and dramarama max

why couldnt this be their dynamic in the canon show

Damien & Julia

WE WERE ROBBED OF THEM!!!!

MK vs the bear

They literally fought in a duel together

Geoff/Bridgette and blaineley

Ma'am that's a child. Leave him by

Mal Vs Duncan

They suck I hope they get in so they're elimination fodder so someone else can go forward easily.

alejandro puppet and heather

1984

Wayne and me

I hate you little white boy! Get a job

[babsvibes]

Bob’s Burgers fic recs: Winter Edition!

By no means is this a complete list, so if you have recommendations for fics about the holidays or general snowy stories then feel free to throw them in the replies!

12 Days of Bob-Mas: Collection of roudise, boblin, zekina and family fluff oneshots by @theangrypomeranian and @littleredruns

Welcome, all, to the 12 days of Bob-mas! For 12 days until Christmas, you can enjoy a healthy dose of romance and/or Belcher family bonding!

Forget-Me-Nots and Marigolds: Collection of tinimmy oneshots by @eroticfriendfictions

Chapter 6: Snowball. A collection of one shots centered around older Tina and Jimmy Jr. after they start living together.

Hung by the Kimchi with Care: Zekina, Gene & drag queens, louigan, and boblin oneshot by @babsvibes

How the future Belcher kids spend their Christmas Eve, each perfect in their own way. Prompts: sick fic, Christmas in drag, and the perfect present.

it always leads you to my hometown: Tinimmy oneshot rated M by @jimmypesto

Over the years, Tina and Jimmy Jr. reunite when he returns to Seymour's Bay for Christmas.

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Graphing All the Way: Sustina two shot by @sailoreuterpe

Tina and Susmita have been dating for a while and Tina feels ready to give a special gift. Will she have the courage?

K5 Noshing - Linda Belcher: Linda-centric Hanukkah drabble by aimmyarrowshigh

Noshing. You know that bakery downtown that has a photo of Linda labeled, 'DO NOT FEED'?

leave the Christmas lights up ‘til january: Boblin, zekina, Gene/Alex, platonic Susmita and Tina, and family fluff oneshots by @jimmypesto

A collection of Christmassy ficlets about The Belchers and company.

Shiver: Louigan oneshot by @percysburgers

"How many times did I tell you to get your engine checked?” aged up louigan stranded in the middle of nowhere au

Snowed In: Zekina oneshot by eightlightminutes

A snow storm leaves Tina home alone with her least-favorite person. Can Tina put aside the rage she feels for Zeke in the spirit of Christmas?

The Santa Trap: Belcher family fluff oneshot by crumblingwalls

BURGER OF THE DAY Happy Hollandaise with Canadian bacon

The Ugly Christmas Sweater Swap: Boblin and family fluff oneshot by wonderminterplus

The Belchers have a ugly Christmas sweater swap.

[multifandoms27-blog]

Reiner Braun Relationship HC's 2

• ───────────────── •

Content: Post-Marley Reiner Braun x GN! Reader

Warnings: Simpage (from me), mentions of kidnapping, mentions of Marco, Zeke. Also slight suggestiveness at the end, but nothing explicit.

Notes: No S4 spoilers, even though this takes place in Marley. Anime watchers can read this 👍

• ───────────────── •

Okay so, a lot of this is going to be based off an rp between me and a friend you know who you are but I feel it's close enough to his character in S4, so bare with me

Reiner took you with him to Marley by force so now you're kinda stuck with him

If you can forgive him after the whole Marco/traitor thing, I would then this will be no problem for you

He's super serious in government meetings and anything pertaining to Titans and Paradis, but when with you he's anything but

Sometimes he needs to be held and told he's okay, sometimes he wants to take you out for a walk, sometimes he just needs your presence with him but don't talk to him...it depends

I feel like he would tell you what's going on within the government and what's happened over at Paradis, even though he's not supposed to and you both could be killed for it

He only does that so you're in the loop and are safe. Although, since you'd be from Paradis, I doubt the government wouldn't make good use of you.

Reiner would do anything to make sure they wouldn't send you back over to Paradis, or make you fight again. Obviously this can only extend so far, unless you gain the favor of Zeke. But that's a discussion for another day.

Reiner would still like some PDA, or just being semi clingy in general, as you're one of his only lights of happiness. But he wants the PDA to be restricted to hand holding in front of Gabi and the others.

He's going to lean on you a lot more in Marley than he ever did in Paradis, and it might be a little overwhelming, maybe annoying, but he's a broken man and is just trying to make you happy while also trying to be happy himself.

He can get jealous pretty easily - he's always worried about losing you. So when he sees you with Zeke once you've gained his favor, he's going to start comparing himself and the older man. He's going to lash out at you and Zeke for it, but will really only beg for forgiveness from you. Please show him the wonderful ways of communicating problems.

When you're alone and you grab his tits chest, he might give you a confused look before letting you continue to mess with him. He doesn't understand your fixation with his chest, but if it makes you happy, they're all yours.

Reiner please give me a chance I beg of you

• ───────────────── •

Here is my Masterlist in case you want to request, or look for more of your favorite character!

[cars-allthedifferentcars2]

Tinimmy week Day One: Party/Drunk @tinimmyweek

Day One: Party/Drunk

Drunk: Tina has her own apartment in this story, Tina and Jimmy Jr are older, 18 years old.) Tina sat on the couch watching her favorite TV show, The Equestranauts. As she got up to heat more popcorn, she heard a knock on the door. "Who could that be?" she thought to herself. She walked to the door and peeked through the peep hole. "Hello? who's there?" she saw a tiny preview of ginger hair peeking out. Tina opened the door seeing Jimmy Jr laid out on the carpet. Tina, "Jimmy Jr? What the hell are you doing on my carpet?"Jimmy Jr, "The chicken is roasting downtown."Tina, "What chicken? There ain't chicken toasting or roasting!"Jimmy Jr, "Can I have a chicken now"Tina *yelling*, "Jimmy Jr, for the thousandth time, I'm not roasting an chicken! There's some steak strips left if you randomly came here to barge down my fridge!" Jimmy Jr got up off the carpet but almost fell. Tina held him up and brought him inside and placed him on the couch.Tina smelled liquor, ''YOU'RE DRUNK!" Jimmy Jr, "no I'm not. Am I?" Tina, "YES!"Jimmy Jr, "DON'T YELL AT ME, DINA!""Tina, "YOU ARE DRUNK, YOU LITERALLY JUST CALLED ME DINA, I'M TINA!"Jimmy Jr, "that's what I said, Dina!"Tina, *facepalms* "oh god. how did you even reach my apartment if you're like this?" Jimmy Jr, "I don't even know."Tina, "Listen once you wear off the drunk ness go home!" Jimmy Jr, "No and I ain't drunk!"Tina, "Yes you are. You can stay here until the drunk ness wears off,  but then you gotta go home!"Jimmy Jr, "No! I wanna stay here! I want that roasted chicken!"Tina, "JIMMY JR, ENOUGH WITH THE ROASTED CHICKEN!" Jimmy Jr falls on his stomach and snores. Tina just sits him up on her couch and covers him with a blanket. Tina as she opens the microwave of popped popcorn, in her mind, "he's lucky he's cute."

In the morning, Jimmy Jr woke up all groggy. He looked around and noticed Tina cooking pancakes. "Tina." Tina turned around and said, "Morning, Jimmy Jr."

"how did I get in your apartment?" He asked still sleepy. Tina chuckled. "Figured you can tell me, you were drunk and I found you on my carpet. "

Jimmy Jr, "oh god, I'm so sorry, I think Zeke kept giving me shots and I don't think we're supposed to be drinking at this age."

Tina, "damn right, now come on, let's have breakfast, you can wash off that remaining liquor with orange juice."

(i tried)

[saplingheaven]

gebby's rp hub

pronouns: she/her

birth year: 2004 (so that I don't have to keep editing this every year)

time zone: pacific (gmt-8)

rules that apply to all of my blogs:

no ooc hate (that's honestly just common sense tbh)

ic anon hate is situational, but generally you should set it up with me first, like agreeing ooc that our characters are enemies or something

no nsfw

pretty much any type of rp blog is allowed to interact. as far as pokeblogging goes, this includes and encourages eebydeebies, sapient pokemon, legendaries, fallers, hybrids, etc.

don't drag me into any ooc drama /srs

I need tone tags. also, please at least try to sound interested in my ideas and such, bc otherwise I'll be fully convinced that I'm boring and not worth anyone's time.

I'm gebby on discord, but please tell me here before trying to add me there bc I'll probably panic if I see an unfamiliar request pop up on discord 💀

don't nitpick at my hc-heavy intepretations of canon characters. ik they're canon-divergent, and I honestly couldn't care less. aside from people who are picky about post length standards (my absolute longest posts are typically between one and two paragraphs), perfectionists about canon accuracy are my least favorite roleplayers

when you send me ask games, always include the question itself in your ask, bc I won't be able to look back at the original post every time

info about the canon that most of my pokeirl blogs are in:

other important notes:

all of my sideblogs' pinned intro posts will have lots of tags just so that people can find them. every subsequent post after that will only have a few tags.

if I reblog any rp calls (ask games, "reblog if you want interactions from me" posts, etc.), it'll be on here and apply to all my sideblogs

I don't interact with "reblog if you support xyz" posts or talk about politics (that anti-elon musk post was an exception)

pokeblog list under the cut

@vxran (faller from a non-pokemon game)

@mayetaya (still not entirely sure what she is yet. she might end up being a faller?)

@no-ones-pokeblog (faller)

@verityandzeke (pokehumans)

@teamsocialism (joke evil team run by verity and zeke)

@her-name-is-teri (crossover au faller)

@cg-johnson (crossover au faller)

@ultra-spacey (pokehuman)

@ubcore (sleeby? pokehuman?? idk what I'd classify him as)

@sylvxtte (pokehuman)

@flying-type-artist (spiderverse au faller)

@students-of-ruin (pokehumans)

@nikowa (pokehuman)

@futuristicheroine (eebydeeby)

@mailcarriercore

@god-is-a-retail-employee (pokehuman)

@joshuastherapydesk (another faller from a non-pokemon game)

@gcsharp (fankid)

@ms-calla (faller from hisui)

@suz1e-and-su2ie (pokehumans)

@julie-dalton-nico-calico (fallers from a book)

@cptmarquez

[ye4gerism]

THE PARADIS MIRROR MAGAZINE ISSUE #2

the new episode of the bachelorette just gets crazier (HUMAN RIGHTS VIOLATIONS???) ! let’s hear from some of the contestants!

EXCLUSIVES WITH THE BOYS (questions submitted by the viewers!)

“where do u see urself in 5 years?”

ARMIN ARLERT: i’m a magazine editor, so i’m hoping that one day i can have some sort of leadership role. only if my boss thinks it’s my time in five years!

EREN YEAGER: i’m hoping i can be a senior partner at my law firm within 5 years! it won’t be easy and it’s probably impossible but what an achievement that would be!

“what do they think of taylor swift/what's their favorite taylor swift song? (it tells you a lot about a man💀)”

ONYANKOPON: taylor swift? i’m not too fond of her. i hope that doesn’t get me kicked off the show.

JEAN KIRSTEIN: i’m not a big swiftie…i’m not a swiftie but her song ‘cardigan’ makes me think of my first high school love. obviously i’ve grown from that relationship but that break up was so hard and those lyrics match us so well. coming back and ending things. so, fuck you, taylor swift.

“how do you feel about marriage and kids?”

REINER BRAUN: i’m already raising a niece. luckily, i got to skip the baby stage but raising kids is already hard as is. i don’t mind having more though. it’s a learning experience. as for marriage…when you know, you know. maybe i will meet my wife on the bachelorette.

CONNIE SPRINGER: marriage has to happen. it’s been apart of my parents’ plan before i was born! all jokes aside, i’d like to get married, which is why i’m on the show! i have 2 siblings who are much younger than me, so i feel like a dad already. kids are cute, so i wouldn’t mind having some!

“Is Eren a hoe ?”

EREN YEAGER: i feel like i’m being targeted????

A LITTLE BIRDIE TOLD ME…: dirt on the cast

“Zeke has a monkey plushy he sleeps with at night”

If I were hit with human rights violation accusations, I’d hug onto my plushy too! Let’s let’s hope the accusations are just a joke. I don’t think they allow plushies in prison!

“Eren is uninterested”

I think have to disagree with this one. I don’t know why but I feel it in my soul that Eren wants y/n real bad.

“Jean has an STD and a bunch of bumps on his d*ck”

HELLO??? The last bachelorette dropped her pants once on the show. Let’s hope y/n is safe about it and that this isn’t true. Would hate to watch that go down. 😬

“eren and armin hooked up last night.”

Would this count as cheating? I mean, be who you are but remember what you’re on the show for.

“I think Zeke is trying to get y/n to pick eren”

After last week’s episode, it’s starting to look like it. And Eren got the best date too! No weird parenting game, no lack of care during a date. Mf went to DISNEY!!! Favoritism much??🤔

only two episodes in and the bach is taking quite a turn! until next time!

hey again! i’ll take a few more votes and responses before closing the poll and posting the chapter. i will try and get on my zoom again!😭 all my school stuff is starting up again and i’m much more dedicated to that.

i do want to address the poll! in regards to the questions, i’m looking for these answers:

not these:

the majority of the bachelorette is reader based. you write the stories! just wanted to address it bc i think we all got a little confused 😭

anyways, here’s the poll! if you already answered the written answer questions, feel free to skip (just let me know in the poll!). until next time :3

taglist: @katestrophes @taylarxse @invisible-mori @tanakaslastbraincell @mrsharuchiyo @parkerluvsu @conniesbbymama @444ctrl @gabbadabbad00 @cvberidiot @maliagurl @greeniegreengreen @teanica @illgrrl @asymetricstar @llovesero @haitainiwhore3 @durag_tanaka @crazychaoticizzy

[vante1920pm]

hi zeke!!! how are you? :D YOU ASK FOR ROTXO AND TSIREYA REQJESTS !! I DELIVER !! can I get some general rotxo & tsireya relationship headcanons? ( separate:D) reader is super affectionate ! loves cuddles and basically praises their names to the heavens!! I love rotxo and tsireya so much :[ oh yes and to answer ur question on what my pronouns were, I go by any pronouns:D thank u for asking !! :D -maggie!!

──;; 𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐒𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐘𝐀 ★☆

★ 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲: I love this !!! I will do a separate post for Rotxo !! :))

◎ | avatar masterlist

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

☆ 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: tsireya/gn!reader

☆ 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: fluffy fluff, ooc, not proof read, move lo'ak it's my turn, being in love with tsireya

confession ──

- You confessed to her on a seashore, watching the sunset together.

It was something you often did as friends. A routine you both held on for months.

- You made her a flower bouquet.

She loved it when you handed them her before you confessed. You picked her favorite ones. She was delighted that you remembered that, although she just mentioned them once.

- You just told her straight up about your feelings.

She wasn't surprised, you two had something going on but never talked about it. She knew that this moment would come and she couldn't be happier about it.

dating ──

- Gives you small kisses when you see each other.

You're a hunter, so you're kind of busy, just like her. It's not rare for you to meet, you see each other every day, but she still misses you when you're gone.

So, when she sees you again, she runs up to you and gives you small pecks all over your face. It makes you overjoyed, since you never felt like that before.

You, of course, give her even more love and affection back.

- Holds your hand when you sleep.

Tsireya loves to hold your hand while sleeping, it makes her feel save, knowing, that you're right next to her.

It's even better that you're more affectionate than her. You hold her in your arms, whispering compliments and praises, because she's literally perfect in your eyes. One of your hands never leaving hers.

You tell her you wish to marry her someday, to hold her like that every night and day. It makes her feel desired and loved.

- Finding small creatures together and acting like you're their parents.

She thinks it's so cute and her smile makes you want to do anything for her. She's so great, fr.

When you're alone, sitting on the sand and one of these creatures walks up to you, you always tell them about Tsireya. About your love for her and the way her eyes look like diamonds in the moonlight.

© 2022, vante1920pm

[theangrypomeranian]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Spread the self-love ❤

I'm sorry this is so late orz life has been pretty crazy this past week lol.

Baby Steps

Summary:

After going through a terrible break up, Tina is left trying to pick up the broken pieces of her heart and life. Luckily, Zeke is there to help her with his tried and true method: touch therapy (literally). Through many trials and tribulations, they slowly learn how to grow and move on...together. A story of healing, friendship, and falling in love.

i doubt anyone is surprised by this choice lol. this fic is my pride and joy, i worked on it for a year and kept up a consistent update schedule for it. it's a story that is very near and dear to my heart and helped me start to heal my inner teenager.

2. i hate accidents (except when we went from friends to this)

Summary:

Best friends Louise and Rudy get married for tax purposes. No, really, that's totally it, honest. No way are any actual feelings gonna form. No way... ...unless...?

the fic i wrote for Roudise week 2023. this story was SO MUCH FUN to write omg. the whole premise started as a joke between my beta reader Red and I about these two getting married for taxes and the prompts for the week were announced i knew i had to use the idea. it was a huge hit with the Roudise side of the fandom and i'm so glad that they all loved it so much.

3. Safe and Sound

Summary:

When Tina Belcher is reaped for the Hunger Games, she's sure that her life is over. But when Zeke Tisdale volunteers as the male tribute and promises to protect her in the arena, she realizes that she might have a chance of surviving this...if she can avoid falling for him.

the Hunger Games AU i wrote for Zekina week 2023. as most of my followers probably know by now, i freaking LOVE the Hunger Games series, both the movies and the books (though I lean a lil more towards the books lol). the prompts for the week immediately made me think of it, and since i'd already had the first 2k or so words typed out already i figured why not finish it for the week? it was also written as the week went on because it was a last minute decision lol.

4. Long Way Home

Summary:

After Zeke leaves for three months to work for a logging company in Alaska, Tina receives a call telling her that he passed away in an avalanche. Devastated but determined to stay strong for her loved ones, she must learn how to live without the one that got away. ...or does she? Because unknown to all, Zeke survived - and he is fighting with the Last Frontier to get back home.

my current WIP. this one started as a weird ass dream i had about my otp and i told Red about it, then she proceeded to pitch a reworking of it for a fic and i was instantly in love with the concept. it's very niche so i don't blame anyone for giving it a pass, but i love it and that's all that matters. and for the fifth rec i'm putting down two because i genuinely cannot choose between them (and since when do i ever follows the rules for these kinds of asks XD):

Meet Me in the Afterglow

Summary:

Three months after she's peer pressured into breaking up with Henry, Susmita gets a call that her grandmother has died. Henry offers to take her home for the funeral and she quickly realizes that she's made a huge mistake. Can she sort through her feelings and win back her man? Or is it too late for them?

i LOVE this fic. normally i hate break up fics but i worked very hard on this one and did SO MUCH RESEARCH for it. overall i think i did really good with it and i'm always thrilled when someone reads it.

you better leave (it's not safe in here)

Summary:

Tina lives an idealistic life in the small community of Victory. Every day is the same, structured, secure. All of her neighbors know and like her, and her husband Jordan is a quiet unassuming man who works hard so that she can stay home and be a good housewife. Life is good and peaceful. However, sometimes she can't help but feel as if she doesn't belong there, and her nightly dreams of a tall and handsome man with an accent make her question if her marriage is really as happy as she's been led to believe. But then strange things start to happen and Tina starts to wonder if something more sinister is going on in Victory...

the Don't Worry Darling AU that no one asked for lmao. i was so let down by the movie but still loved the concept, so i decided to use it for a fic and loved the end result. just like with LWH, this one is very niche so i understand why it's not more popular. but i really love this fic and hope that one day it gets the recognition it deserves.

[karizard-ao3]

One of my favorite things about Eren is that he actually went on and asked his older brother, who he’s not close to, for girl advice. Also this wasn’t 15 year old impulsive Eren, he was 19 (!). And in the middle of a war and discussing a genocidal plan. And in true Eren fashion, he tries to disguise his intentions and keep cool and collected, while Zeke immediately sees through his act and just tells him Mikasa likes him. The concept of Eren being so desperate for Mikasa that he actually turns to Zeke out of all people to ask for dating advice never fails to send me. Can you just imagine how this scene plays out in a modern au?

Eren is such a dork. I can just see him bringing up Mikasa constantly while they're plotting because he's got her permanently on the brain. Zeke's like, "We're going to need to fight our way out in this contingency," and Eren is like, "Mikasa Ackerman is soooo good at fighting. That wouldn't even be a problem for her."

In a modern au, I think we're looking at Grisha being originally from Germany and moving to the US for his work (and let's say this is the cause of his divorce from Dina), so Zeke is in Germany and Eren hasn't had much of a chance to get to know him. However, Zeke very much wants the chance to be the big brother he always dreamed he could be. When Eren drops out of college to mope around at home in his childhood bedroom, Carla and Grisha decide to send him off to see his older brother and see if a change of scenery will help get him out of his slump.

Eren's trying to act like a cool tough guy but he is, in fact, just exposing himself as a down bad loser who can't get over his best friend who, when he tried to get her to confess her feelings before he left on his trip, froze and said he was family because she didn't know what he was after.

Zeke, luckily, eats it up. Big brothers help with girl problems and so that is what he will do! And, it's clear from Eren's endless ramblings that she likes him, too!

I could totally see Zeke stealing Eren's phone and texting Mikasa for him in secret. Like, he grabs it while Eren is in the shower and really quickly sends off, "I miss you so much. I wish you were here. I would take you on a hiking date," then just doesn't tell Eren about it so when Mikasa texts back, "I miss you, too. When are you coming home? We can go for a hike together here..." Eren sees her message, sees the message from himself that he does not remember sending, and starts to wonder if he's going crazy. But, like, Mikasa seems down for a hiking date, so........ is there really an issue?

Meanwhile, Zeke is sitting there, schemer that he is, tapping his fingers together and smiling smugly to himself because it's all coming together and if he plays his cards right maybe he can be Eren's best man at their wedding (he can't. The honor goes to Armin. Zeke doesn't even get invited except as an afterthought because Eren is happy to go on pretending he's an only child.)