#can you tell that i used different brushes for the colouring than i normally do

[limoncats]

blood warning

posting the Eostrahime drawings from this post here

bloody version under cut

[donutdrawsthings]

Do you have any art tips?

I've given it a lot of thought, and here are what my art tips are!

Enjoy yourself! this is a hobby, after all! I've found that drawing from emotion makes it easier to enjoy the art making process, and that emotion can literally be ANY emotion. Sadness, Joy, Rage, Desire,,, they are all great motivators to start drawing and when you're so full of emotion, you might find yourself feeling relieved after a drawing session!

Get Inspired and REPLICATE!

The way I learned how to draw most things is by looking closely at my favourite shows/movies and picking apart what I like about them so much! Make fanart! Redraw one of your favourite scenes! Care very little about what others will think and focus purely on enjoying yourself! Oh and also tracing is a perfectly fine thing to do too. That's a way to train steadying your hand with certain curves!

No art style? no problem!

An art style is really just a word for the way you draw. You've ALREADY got a style! It doesn't need to be eccentric looking to be unique. That being said, you'll find your art style developing naturally as you get more inspired and learn to draw certain things through fanart. What people will look at as Iconically You is really just a big compilation of all the things YOU love and got inspired by, and that's nothing to be ashamed of. It's normal and how it works in professional mediums like film making, too!

Focus on your own progress I see a lot of beginner artists beating themselves up over not yet being able to draw what they envision, and for that my biggest tip is to not see your latest drawing as your last. It's healthy to analyse what you do and don't like about what you've just drawn, but be kind to yourself about it. instead of telling yourself "I can't draw [thing]", try telling yourself "I don't like how I drew [thing], because of [reason]. Next time I'll try it differently". That next time can be immediately after, but don't underestimate the power of a good nap either! Not worrying about it and sleeping on it will get you closer to where you want to go, rather than getting more and more upset with yourself!

Art is knowledge, study it! Being ABLE to draw doesn't make you 21st century Da Vinci, knowing HOW THINGS LOOK and HOW TO MAKE IT are where the real power lies! Look around and really study how things are. The glow from a lit jack-o-lantern, the colour of the fluffy mold that starts growing on it, the way paint starts to chip off the wooden porch, the colours of the sky at any time of day... Look at all of it and ask yourself, how would I go about drawing that? How many layers would I use or what brush do I need? What colour is that on the digital colour wheel of my art programme? And then once you get your gear and draw you can re-evaluate again what you've made and ask yourself if you captured what you saw the way you want it or if you'd do something differently next time!

Don't listen to online content creators Now you might start looking at me funny, because that'd just contradict everything you just read LMAO, but I still think it's an important thing to say. Online there are a lot of artists who tell you to NEVER EVER do something because if you DO draw this way your art is BAD and you're doing it WRONG. However, I believe it's impossible to do art "wrong", because art by its very nature is purely subjective. A point I see in a lot of tutorials is to NEVER EVER shade with black. And while I don't shade with pure black either, shading with black doesn't make your art impossible to love... Invader Zim is an example of that!

As you can see, Invader Zim has an extremely unique style that's loved by many, yet it does feature a shading technique a lot of people say you shouldn't ever do... It is, subjective! And part of the style!

Anyways, sorry this got so long! I hope it was of any help or what you were looking for :'oD

[littencloud9]

hi, sending you more cuz i can <3

if you want to attempt jouzai..... jouzai + past crimes

and/or

kunichuuzai + ocean

HELLO!!! jouzai are so bad for each other i love it. hope i did your sillies justice bc WHAT is going on with them

—

Out of all the crimes Jouno has committed throughout his life, Dazai is the worst of them all.

A crime list taller than he is, an ex-Port Mafia Executive (sure, he isn’t anymore, but the fact that he escaped and lived to tell the tale speaks a thousand words), and devious intent that rivals Jouno himself. He is an amalgamation of the worst traits Jouno offers, and falling for him is like falling back into habits he had long swore out of.

It’s like facing a mirror of his younger self, hollow and wandering, searching for something to fill the void.

Despite his title, Jouno is not justice reincarnated. His friends, loyal and fearsome and kind, are better suited for that title. They don’t feel that spark of pleasure when listening to someone’s agonised screams. They weren’t stuck in a cruel and heartless criminal organisation before joining the Hunting Dogs like he was.

They aren’t pressing Dazai Osamu against the wall of their house, fingers wrapped around his wrists, lips inches apart.

Jouno is hyperaware of the distance between them. Normally, being so close to someone is utterly unbearable. A dust’s natural response to being disturbed is to disperse, after all, and Jouno’s body reacts no differently.

But with Dazai under his skin, No Longer Human taking its effect, he doesn’t feel that prickle of discomfort anymore. Instead, Jouno wants to bring him closer than ever.

“You’re taking awfully long, Jouno-san,” Dazai whispers. His breath fans over his lips. Jouno wants more. “I’m starting to think you just wanted to arrest me all over again.”

“I do,” Jouno replies, gripping Dazai’s wrists tighter. The way his fingers encircle his bones, as if to mimic a pair of handcuffs, only serves to prove his point further.

“Well? Go on then. Bring justice to the world, dog.”

Their lips crash together as Jouno hisses at him to shut up. He presses closer, leaving no gap for air between their bodies.

Justice, Jouno thinks. Is this what salvation feels like?

—

kunichuuzai!!! i love them so much. have some ✨ Pondering ✨

—

Kunikida despises the colour blue.

It doesn’t matter what shade it is. Perwinkle blue, navy, cerulean… They all remind him of that wretched case, one where he had to confront what it means to be idealistic—what it means to be himself.

It’s difficult to admit, but seeing a blue scarf still makes him tense up, even when he knows it can’t hurt him.

Though, recently, Kunikida finds that blue might not be such a horrible colour anymore.

He watches Dazai chase Chuuya around the edge of the shore, a water gun in his hands. Chuuya screeches bloody murder, kicking up waves and waves of water and splashing it towards Dazai in an attempt to throw him off. The sun shines down on them, not too hot, but just a gentle glow that lights up their silhouettes.

Under the sparkling sun, the ocean glitters. Kunikida sits under the umbrella he’s set up for himself, his eyes following his partners with every step they take.

They’re beautiful.

His finger brushes against something in the sand. When he looks down, he sees the button Dazai always wears on his tie. He picks it up, rubbing the surface with the fabric of his tank top.

The button gleams a sweet shade of turquoise.

He stares at it, eyes softening. This shade of blue is nice. It reminds him of warm showers and slow dancing in the rain and tight hugs after a long day. When he holds it in his hands like this, he can still feel the heavy thump of a heartbeat, strong and comforting.

“Kunikida!”

Kunikida looks up, gasping when a flurry of red whizzes towards him. Chuuya crashes into him with enough strength to knock him over, and Kunikida falls onto his back with a grunt.

“Oi! That’s cheating!” Dazai whines from afar. “You can’t use gravity to run away!”

Dazai still has his feet in the water, waving his arms around dramatically as he complains. Chuuya ignores him, pushing themself up on their arms, grinning down at Kunikida.

“Thanks for catching me,” they say. Their hair drips with seawater, landing onto Kunikida’s cheeks with a quiet splat.

He looks up at Chuuya, staring into their eyes. Full of life and power and adoration, and so, so blue. Kunikida gets lost in that sapphire gaze, drowning as if he was looking into a whirlpool instead of the ocean.

“Chuuya!” Dazai yells, finally breaking Kunikida out of his stupor. “Stop flirting with Kunikida-kun!”

“Hah?!” Chuuya’s cheeks flush, but they leap up, dashing back towards him. Kunikida watches them go and bodyslam into Dazai, sending them both tumbling with a splash.

His heart jumps unsteadily as he holds the button tighter in his palm.

Maybe blue can be a stunning colour sometimes.

[54625]

Five do you have any cloud tips? you are very good at them and i am struggling. (specifically rain clouds if you are able, but i'll take normal clouds too)

Hopefully this doesn't end up too long-winded, but here is MY general process on how to paint clouds. This is not guaranteed to work for everyone, it's just a walkthrough of how I see it.

On the (semi) realistic side of things

There are some general rules of thumb when creating the form of a cloud. With your average cloud, you can split it up quite easily into large shapes and layers, which you then simply detail a little to form the fluffiness.

This is a very simple and classic example of a cloud. I kept the basic outline of the cloud rounded, formed with essentially a bunch of intersecting circles. I made the layers slightly different colours to get across a sense of depth; don't forget that clouds exist in a 3d space and aren't just a flat shape. When adding in the highlights, I made sure to shape them. If you look a little closer you'll see that pretty much all of them make little "C" shapes, continuing to establish the roundness of the cloud. (I do this for traditional painting too; making sure that my paintbrush always goes in round, circular strokes to blend the paint into that shape.)

Now let's look at rainclouds. Same principle, a couple differences. Firstly, and most importantly; most of the time, when it is raining or storming, the entire sky is clouded, no blue visible. You can usually get away with portraying this by simply replacing the blue sky in the background with grey, but don't forget to introduce a little variation/shape to show that it's not flat.

Secondly, one thing I love to do with clouds like these is this sort of "negative highlight" thing. As you can see at the peaks of the cloud it actually gets darker, and the cracks or creases between the layers are the lightest parts. This gets across the look that the cloud is being lit from behind rather than the side, which makes a lot more sense for clouds like these.

On the stylised side of things

Clouds in real life come in tonnes of different shapes, sizes, and colours. Because of this, clouds can look like pretty much anything; you can and should use this to your advantage in your art.

Clouds are the perfect subject matter for stylisation, in my opinion, as they do not have to look realistic at all in order to get across their intended effect, and because their real life counterparts vary so vastly.

When drawing clouds in a stylised way, I find there are two main principles to remember:

1. Prioritise colour.

and

2. Contextualise.

It is pretty easy, despite the lack of detail, to understand what these colours are meant to represent. You can get a lot across by simply using very strong and well selected colours, and this is true for all aspects of art, not just clouds. The white and blue makes you think of bright clouds on a sunny day, the orange and pink is so famously associated with sunsets, and the dark greys remind you of storms and rain. Even without much form, good colour choices will still help you tell what you are looking at.

This is where "contextualising" comes into play. Your clouds will immediately become much more recognisable as clouds as soon as you give them a good context (with colours that match the atmosphere) to stand behind. You put them above a landscape or behind a building or above a character and it becomes obvious as being the sky. Adding a context frees you and really allows you to fuck around with styles and shapes to your heart's content, while still keeping the intention clear.

With this in mind, you can stylise in whatever ways you so wish, and play around with shapes and movement and brushes. (And hopefully be a little more creative than these examples 😅)

I hope this was at least a little bit helpful! I look forward to seeing what you have made/ will make.

[rainbowlarentsblog]

I still remember the longing and thirsty looks across the stage, the grazing of the hands, the brushing of the thighs, the craving for that contact that makes you feel like you exist, like you actually make sense, despite the image of you people have in their heads.

I cannot unsee all of that, it is not much the use of colours, the shirts they wear or the lyrics change. It is what I recognise gave me life when I was closeted and couldn’t be open in my love with my partner who was there, next to me, within easy reach.

I can also see this denial as out of place, at an odd moment, looking very much planned but honestly creating more issues for him compared to the ones they thought it may have resolved. There is a reason why H avoids these types of questions and why he just keeps concentrating on his career and ignoring the rest.

If it is just part of the job, why giving it so much thought- I have got many ideas about it, but maybe this is not the time and the place to spell them out.

Someone told me that they probably broke up and he is tired to hear stories about them. I could argue with that, coz if I had ended it with my partner I wouldn’t want to keep bringing our relationship up.

Also as a denial it was very much similar to others he has done in the past and it comes quite late - let’s be honest, as he mentioned, anything he says won’t make much of a difference at this stage. It may piss some veteran larries off and some members the community, but there will be new ones taking their place, some of them possibly more focussed on the theories because less disillusioned than a Larrie who has been a fan for a while.

They are definitely at a different stage in their relationship, they are more mature, more disingenuous and possibly more at ease with their sexuality. As a result they possibly need us less, we could be seen as a hindrance- but in my head and in my heart it doesn’t cancel the reason why I got here in the first place.

I know that they still needs support in their closet and I may be not vocal in theorising if they are still together or if they will come out - and at the end of the day it is their life and they don’t owe us anything- but I will keep enjoying their music, supporting them as artists and be here for them as members of my community, independently from their relationships.

I am truly not perfect though, so if I hide in the corner to lick my wounds and look for the strength to go again, I am sure it is perfectly normal. And I would like to see some kindness on the sm - different people may deal with situations like this in different ways, so let’s not judge or shame someone just because they didn’t react as you would have.

Don’t tell them how they should feel, what they should do, because what is right and works for you doesn’t mean that is right and would work equally effectively for someone else.

[squircatlies]

Today is the day I unleash my Mr. Bonzo fanart upon this webbed site.

This post is relatively safe up until the cut.

Is the *tips fedora* meme over a decade old? Yes. Do I care? No, absolutely not.

~

Now this is where I recommend "getting off" this post to anyone bothered by graphic depictions of body horror, blood, violence, or Mr. Bonzo (monster, not mascot like above).

I know the first image is silly, but I cannot stress enough how serious I am when I say:

Proceed at your own risk.

Now that you have chosen to continue, I have arranged the images in order of least to most vile and disturbing (though that might be slightly subjective on my part).

Remember that you can click off this post at any time.

Final warning: split tongue Bonzo.

I tried channeling Julia Drawfee with the lineart a little bit. Didn't feel like shading that one, so it's a bit flat.

Where did I lose my colours? Plot twist: the first image in this post is actually the last I've made, so technically I gained the colours. I wanted it to have more of a cheery vibe, unlike the ones under the cut, which I wanted to be kinda dreary and I feel like adding too much colour can mess that up.

Alright, I'll address the tongue. Remember how his head splits in tmagp 12? Yeah, it's a nod to that and also I asked myself "how do I make his design worse than it already is?" and that's the only answer I could come up with. I debated adding stitches connesting the two halves of the tongue but couldn't figure out how, so you're welcome. It will be present in all the upcoming drawings as well.

~

The next one is bloody, but it's not that much worse than the previous one overall.

I was playing with filters after I was done with this piece, because I felt like it lacked something, but didn't know what. Really liked this one, I think it's some sort of a gradient map. It pixelised the image and adjusted the colours a bit, it also really made the blood pop out, though it covered up some of the details.

Why did he lose his hat? It's stupid and hard to draw.

You may have noticed the artstyle change a little, the previous images having neat lineart and little to no shading. That's because I am using different tools, sketchy and soft brushes, that allow me to experiment with lighting and textures more (plus the aforementioned filter altering the image even further).

~

Alright, I feel like this last image deserves a separate warning. It references episode 12 (spoiler ahead), specifically the moment before the bartender loses a hand, though it's not entirely accurate. It's rendered in more detail than any of the previous images, so keep that in mind before scrolling down.

Basically it's pov: Bonzo licks your hand.

I feel like I could've made his tongue bigger in this one, it seems kinda small compared to his mouth. I really like how the skin on his face ended up looking. It took a lot of work.

The spit makes it look weirdly sexual, doesn't it? Listen, that was not my intention, but I'm not erasing it. I set out to make the worst thing I could and, though not without cost, I have achieved it.

I tried splattering Bonzo in blood, but it wasn't really working for me and it covered up a lot of the detail I liked, so I just put it in the background.

The human hand is drawn from reference, which I found by googling "hand reaching out away from the viewer". And let me tell you: google is shit at looking for drawing references, but I figured it was just going to be a sketch to explore an idea, so I didn't bother trying to get a better one. And then I fixated on it for a couple hours, you know, like a normal person.

I literally (and I mean no exaggeration) dusted off my drawing tablet after a few months of no use to spend the entire weekend, after tmagp 12 came out, glued to the screen making those images, except for the b'onzo one, which I made this evening.

Just to clarify: I drew all of those by myself. No filthy AI image generation is allowed in this house. I am capable of committing far greater sins than an artificial intelligence ever will.

The only thing left here is to extend my sincere congratulations/condolences to whoever got this far. It's up to you to either think you're brave or realise that you're foolish for doing so, but be comforted by the fact that at least you didn't make this post, which I cannot say for myself.

[cerealforkart]

I made myself these little dress up dolls because everyone’s getting changed all the time, here’s the first batch, outfits pre-episode 13

Design notes under the cut

[part 2] [part 3]

Lincoln

* I would first of all like to thank Lincoln for being shaped like a model (long boy) and thus very easy to dress up

* I forgot that Link needed to tear off his sleeves to make Normal a diaper in lesson 14, so in lesson 11 he grabs a sweater when I assume he goes home between escaping the FBI and returning to school

* Lincoln is so comically tall the Teeny costume (which I just moved from Normal to Link and edited to match Link’s pose) only reaches his knees. It actually looked so stupid that I had to edit it to make the Teeny costume slightly longer in the legs

* Link has two roombas in his room, he’s a clean boy, he isn’t walking around Taylor’s house in his bare feet, he doesn’t trust like that, it’s sock time

Scary

* I actually originally planned for Scary to have more piercings, but I forgot to add them in lesson 1. Let’s just say her mom won’t let her go crazy on the piercings, from what we’ve heard in rad facts (wouldn’t let her get a tongue piercing or learn guitar) that sounds in character

* I wanted to do the Shit Garden logo on Scary’s shirt like one of those metal bands that only people who like metal can actually read, but I only have so much time and patience

* I want so badly to play with Scary’s hair more, but I haven’t really had the chance, I hope there will be more excuses to give her different styles in the future, I like the braided bun for fancy occasions a lot

* Big T-shirt and shorts are peak pyjamas, love it for her. Also, you don’t need to know how long I spent trying to come up with something for her shirt to say

Normal

* Don’t tell anyone but I kind of miss drawing Teeny’s big stupid head every day, it was easy comedy

* I did actually draw a Jimmy Buffet design on the shirt before scribbling over it, you can barely see if you look closely

* I don’t actually have anything to say about Normal’s dance outfit so I guess I’ll just take this opportunity to talk about my Normal design in general. He was the one it took me the longest to land on and I’m still unsure if I’m happy with him, I want his hair to be long enough to just sorta hang and be greasy, but not so long that it will get in his face too much and I still consistently fail on it

* Not much to say about his sleepover fit either. Froggy :)

Taylor

* I had originally planned for everyone to be wearing their bracelets on their left wrists but in episode 8 it’s mentioned that Taylor is wearing his on his right, at that point I think I had only drawn Taylor’s bracelet once so it was easier to just change his and let him be a special boy (also, they keep the bracelets on post-FBI because Taylor never really has an opportunity to take it off and the others wear theirs in solidarity)

*After Lesson 10, Taylor swaps out the crest of friendship from Digimon to wear his dad’s ring of swapping as a necklace, he tends to grab at it when his dad or the topic of betrayal comes up

* I hate Taylor for his dance fit. No longer my favourite son

* Not really a design note but I watched the Sailor Moon dub in three parts on youtube with my little sister huddled around our home computer after school, we’re real OGs

Hermie

* I finally decided to add the Joker makeup to my Hermie design, I found a powdery sorta brush to use for it so now he’s a true clown. Good for him I guess

* You may notice that I’ve tweaked my Hermie design and his colour scheme just a little bit. This is because white Hermie is dead and you know what? Good for him. I also made his hair a little wavier for Scam, you’ll start seeing the updated Hermie design (as if you can tell there’s a difference other than the very slight change in hairstyle) in lesson 16, because I drew the lesson 15 pages before episode 23 came out and I wasn’t going to go back and change them

* Stupid Joker tie. Hate it

* No sleepover fit for Hermie. Tragic. They need to have another sleepover and include him

[sphylor]

Sphyyyyy please tell me all the things about Robins 😊

okay okay okay SO. european robins are these little guys: (pics my own you can find better ones online though)

more under the cut :3

they are so silly and sweet and theyre my favourite. this one ive actually sorta become friends with! robins in the uk are pretty curious when it comes to humans (in mainland europe they and other songbirds used to be hunted and trapped so theyre a lot more afraid of humans but robins were never hunted in the uk). if you're digging in the garden they will sit nearby and watch for any worms you unearth. also just in general they like to watch humans and are generally unfazed if they spot you watching them too. there have been so many cases of people befriending robins. i remember watching a news segment on an old lady who had a robin who would fly into her home and they would sit and watch the telly together HFHSH.

theyre also extremely territorial though when it comes to other robins and sometimes just other birds in general (i saw my robin friend chase away a pair of bluetits the other week fjndnc) so the average lifespan of a robin is around 13 months as most dont survive their first year due to territorial disputes. however if they do survive beyond that then they have been known to live up to 19 years old!! which is pretty impressive for such a small bird. but to give you an idea of how territorial they are they have been known to try and fight their own reflections and even red feather dusters!!

also speaking of the colour red they have the nickname "robin red-breast" which may seem strange considering that their breast is actually orange. the reason for this is because when they were named we just didnt have a word for the colour orange until the 16th century. this is also one of the reasons why they are so heavily related to christmas as well! during the victorian times sending christmas cards became a tradition and the posties would wear big red coats to keep them warm and so they earned the nickname of "robin" or "redbreast" and so artists started depicting robins on postcards to represent the people who delivered them! also robins dont tend to migrate from the uk during the winter and we even get more who migrate over from Scandinavia during this time of year so you see them a lot and their bright orange feathers are easy to spot. theres also some myths surrounding robins and the story of the birth of christ. one of them says there was a fire in the stable and the robin flapped its wings over it to put it out but the flames turned its breast orange in the process and Mary blessed all robins to henceforth have a orange breast because of this.

they are normally one of the first birds you hear in the morning and the last ones you hear in the evening as they start singing around half an hour before sunrise and stop around half an hour after sunset. they have a different song in the warmer months to that of the one in the colder months. their winter song sounds lot more... mournful and sorrowful? you really have to listen to them both and compare them to understand the difference.

they will rarely ever nest in a manmade bird box and even if they do its one that has a wide square opening rather than the small circular hole most birdboxes have. but even then they still prefer to nest in natural areas close to the ground and out of the way. their nests are normally cup shaped and made out of dead grass moss and leaves rather than twigs and they line them with hair (tip for people who own cats or dogs or other animals with a lot of hair that you have to brush: leave out the hair in like an empty bird feeder so that birds can use them to make their nests!!)

and finally I'll leave you with a video i recorded of one singing back in september. you'll see that multiple times it looks down at me and sees im there but its unbothered and doesnt fly away

:3

[verawhisk]

my drawing process (thank you @pepper-ika!)

i draw and colour for a long long time. i don't do the traditional sketch + lineart + colour -- sketches are hard to line, they're kind of time-consuming and usually they end up better than the lineart, so i just draw like normal and clean it up before colouring. i start at the head and end at around the feet, kinda like a person showering (lol). here i'm using your typical pencil brush you can find in any standard art program.

a tip i got from another artist was to colour using a thick, opaque pen brush that varies a lot in width. it saves a Lot of time. before they showed me that, i made the mistake of using a soft, painterly brush to colour my art. it hurt my wrist because i had to press really hard to get flat colour -- when all that time i could have just been using a pen brush! also, i start with soft colours because they're nicer to look at.

2. i do colourful midtones like redness in the skin or maybe a blue five o clock shadow if they have one. from this point onward, i use a flat square-ish brush combined with a painterly smudger and a soft airbrush.

i read somewhere that you should apply perfume on the moistest parts of your body so i kind of use that same idea when drawing redness. usually i do it where skin meets skin: folded arms, a crunched back, closed hands, and that place where the thighs touch the buttcheeks, lolol. and of course: the nose, lips, and ears. it makes the skin look real and warm and lively!

3. i lay down my shadows and lights, usually in that order. and at this point, i'm throwing extra shadow on wrinkles, fat, bumps, lumps, etc. a body without rolls is like an angel without wings!

also i smudge like CRAZY here. just like how it's impossible to have "too much gravy" on your chicken, it's impossible to have "too much blending" when you're drawing skin. blend that ish.

when it comes to the colour of the shadows, i always make shadows the base colour but darker and more saturated, and i move the hue a little to the left (for example: orange goes to red, green goes to yellow, purple goes to blue). i do that with, like, every colour. i can't tell if it's lazy or not but at this point i'm too scared to ask.

4. finally i make some minor adjustments like liquifying to fix lopsided eyes or oversized heads/hands. when i was in high school, my art teacher would say "great, but watch the size of the feet, hands, and neck," lolol. he was right ofc. when i go "hm... that looks a little weird," i have to trust that gut feeling because when i do fix it, it ends up looking way better. here is a horrifying gif illustrating that.

AHH!!!

alternatively you could do a messy line and color, then do a whole paintover like i did here. this is awesome for details because you dont have to go back and change the lineart - you just paint over and add whatever you want and redraw the line to fit it.

i dont really use the different layer modes that much. in this one i used a gradient map of the drawing as an overlay. idk if that really does anything major but it does create a new range of colors to play with. i also used a multiply layer to cast a big shadow over the card (layer 8) because it has this tiiiny little pattern that would be a pain in the butt to draw shadows over. everything else is pretty standard.

(and no i dont name my layers... yes i will be changing my name and moving countries)

another thing worth noting: i use airbrushing A LOT. i remember reading somewhere that using airbrushes is like. a cardinal sin. it’s not, man. it’s great. airbrushes and smudging are dope and i use them all the time.

i hope you found this helpful! have a great weekend <3

[pokemon-ash-aus]

Heyyo! Hope this ask reaches you well nwn. I have a couple hundred questions about ur art style and storytelling methods if you don’t mind :3

Most important one: How do you draw Mewtwo fingers so well 😭😭😭😭

Also, what program(s) do you use? Canvas size for different projects? What brush settings? And how do you sketch, line and colour? Which step is your favourite? How long do you normally take from piece to piece?

How do you come up with your different AUs? Any particular inspirations? What tips would you give someone just starting out a comic on tumblr?

And uhh any general tips on getting around tumblr? Blogs you really like?

Sorry for all these questions, really big fan if you can’t tell :’D I actually really love the pride art piece you did~

So i tried answering this before and it doesnt post so uhhhhh heres to hoping it works?

1. I base Mewtwo's paws as hands, worked without the rounded digits first then moved to rounded digits so... Take that as you will?

2. I use Clip Studio Art and Procreate! Mostly, anyways XD i also sometimes default back to Paint tool Sai, or Fire Alpaca if i want a different brand lol.

3. I vary in size for different projects. My animations are different than my sketches, my sketches are different from my completed art and my completed art is different for my comics! It also helps my brain not get tired XD

4. I tend to favor my lineart and rendering! Though both of them take equally long times, i render less But i love it more.

5. Depends on the project. I can typically churn out colored pieces in like an hour or so! Sketches are faster.

6. A lot of them are inspirations of something else. Shiny AU was just cause i liked Shiny Pokemon. But Dead AU was based off Danny Phantom and Mimikyu au was a "What if" scenario of the dead au!

7. Oop, Danny Phantom for the Dead AU. Legendary Mew was based off the whole Chosen one BS XD False Twins was slightly based off of TC but was actually based off another AU where Ash and Mewtwo were sorta close friends.

8. Tagging is your best friend~ don't be afraid to interact with other blogs. If someone is being mean, just block em and move on!

9. Getting around Tumblr? I'd say reblog, follow peeps, go to your favorite fandoms/tags! You'll get mutuals in no time!

10. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh a lot of peeps but i dont wanna bother then with tags XD so nontagged peeps!

Phlurri

XxTC-96xX

MewtwoAndMe

Bluesues

DistortionMewtwo

Mewtales/Mewdump

Penumbra

Loupy Mongoose

Ask-Mirage-Twos

TazerPones/MegaMew and Crew

The Mew Crew

And a few more but i cant remember tumblr names djdbdb

And thank you! I have one more peice i want to finish before i forget- its a peice i didnt get to do last year XD

[tic-toc-clock77]

Continuation of the Toby story, this time from Clockwork/Natalie's perspective! (Yes, there's going to be Ticciwork in this story)

September 27th 2013, 1:07 a.m.

"Natalie, what the hell are you doing?" Asks the young blond man, tied to a chair in his living room by his ex-girlfriend, Natalie Ouellette. Natalie laughs in response, her brown hair falling over her green eye. Her other eye, with the pocket watch shoved into it, ticks slowly. She's not even sure how it still works.

"You know, Chris. I really tried to be normal, to be a functioning member of society but that's not for me, I've discovered." She giggles maniacally, playing with her steak knife in one hand, the stitches she'd sewed into her cheeks turn up when she smiles.

"You know, I noticed that-" A sudden crash through the window behind her reveals someone she's never seen before. "The fuck?" She whips around to face the intruder. On the floor, a young boy, looking the same age as herself, brushes himself off as he stands.

The boy is pale with brown hair, his sweater a lighter shade of the same colour. "You're Natalie Outlette?" He asks her. She raises an eyebrow but nods slowly. "Great, I'm Toby. The Slenderman sent m-m-" Toby's words stifle. "Sorry, tourettes." He clears his throat. "The Slenderman sent me here to take you back to him." Natalie blinks, dumbfounded.

Clearly this guy is crazy, she thinks to herself. "I'm sorta doing something." She points with her knife toward Chris. "Oh, he gave me permission to kill anyone who gets in the way of bringing you so I'll help with that." The boy says, grabbing one hatchet off the floor from where he fell.

"I'll explain as we do this." Toby grabs a piece of cloth off the table and shoves it into Chris's mouth. "So, Slenderman is real." He says first, judging where to slice first. "The Slenderman finds a bunch of people, like you and me to kill for him and bring the bodies to him so he can continue to house us and stuff." He says, smashing his hatchet down on Chris's hand, cutting it off. Natalie listens, in disbelief, fully thinking some crazy guy just made his way into the house. To be fair she had just done the same, breaking into her ex-boyfriend's house.

"We kill for him? Whoever we want to?" She asks, cutting into Chris's other hand. "No. He assigns us people to kill and others to go on those missions with." He tells her. Natalie judges this silently. "Can I say no?" Toby shakes his head. "I mean, you can live outside the base but not outside the forest. Regardless, you have to be either a slasher or a proxy." He informs.

"Is there a difference?" She asks. Toby nods, "Slashers and Proxies do the same things generally but Proxies are just better at their jobs and they get to mentor new slashers." He informs her. Chris sits in between the two, screaming in muffled pain while they continue to speak causally. His hand is finally chopped off by Natalie and falls to the floor.

"So, Slender sent me after you so I could mentor your skills." He says, looking over Chris's tortured state in the chair. "You're gonna mentor me?" She asks, standing up again to run her knife along Chris's neck before making a large slit, slowly.

Toby watches from the floor as blood seeps from Chris's neck, effectively ending his life. His head falls limp, as does the rest of his body. He stands beside Natalie. "Got any garbage bags?" Toby asks.

Natalie, having packed Chris's body away and cleaned off the blood, throws the body bag through the window. The bag lands with a thud onto the ground, Toby picks it up and throws it over his shoulder. Natalie rushes down the stairs and then leaves out of the door.

"You're not gonna run away?" Toby asks her as they begin to walk toward the forest. "I have nowhere else to go." She sighs, "Even if that whole thing you told me sounds incredibly fake, it's better than prison for these murders." She pokes the garbage bag.

Toby walks slowly to meet Natalie's pace, the moon shines brightly but the two sneak around in the dark of the forest. Toby, having been a proxy for the last 3 months, is able to carry the bag without blood dripping from it.

They return to the main cabin or 'the base'. He leads her down the long hallway to the Slenderman's room. He knocks then enters. Natalie stares at the large creature. She stays silent to judge and listen.

Toby leaves after a moment, allowing Natalie to spend time alone with the creature. "Clockwork." He says, facing toward her, "That is the name you go by?" He asks and she nods. "Do you know why I have asked you to be here?" Natalie shakes her head. "You show promise. Much promise. I believe you will be a good asset to me." He places a hand down on his desk. "Now, as much as that is true, you are reckless and frankly, rather unhinged. That must be stopped. Which is why I'm going to recruit you on missions with Toby for the time being." He explains, hands flat on the desk.

"As my mentor?" Slender nods to her question. "Your room will be on the second floor, feel free to design it how you wish. You are free to go." She leaves at that mention. Having exited, she jumps when Toby's hand lands on her shoulder, "Come with me." He says, leading her up the stairs of the cabin toward her room.

[wanderingchocolateeclair]

Neon Souls - Soulbonds

Okidoki, this is the last info post before I get to the main plot, I swear /lh

Soulbonds!! Yes, they're the same as Soulmates, but I just like to use a different term that was made up in-universe.

(But also bc I didn't actually mean for this to be a soulmate au at first and didn't really connect the whole soulbond thing to being soulmates until someone pointed it out lol)

(But I am not complaining kjdfghd-)

Anyway, so, a large majority of people are born with "defects" (remember that though these people are still people, they are treated like robots and non-human junk)

These defects can range from missing or faulty senses, emotions, feelings, or even limbs and organs being missing or faulty.

While certain defects will be fixed medically-missing limbs/organs usually-with some requiring "fixing" by AFO, some of these just cannot be fixed medically.

These defects will be fixed when a person meets and establishes their soulbond.

A very rare portion of people are born "perfect" with no defects whatsoever, and this usually means that they do not have a soulbond, though that does not at all mean they are incapable of being with someone!!

Usually, these "perfect" folk are immediately chosen by AFO for Special Experimentation, to try and perfect the formula even further and turn them into pawns for his schemes.

It is either that or he decides to "Gift" them to the Skyracing commission to take care of. (Hawks....was one of these Gifts)

A bond can between more than two people, and yes, this could end with someone looking like a walking rainbow.

A bond also does not have to be romantic, platonic soulbonds are very common (and QPRs <3333)

Everyone has their own soul colour, yes?

And each Soulbond has its own colour.

This colour will be different to the people's individual colours, and usually will be either a mix of the colours or a separate colour linking them both.

(Like how edgejeanist are red and blue respectively, but their bond colour is purple)

This colour is very important.

If you remember from my other post, injuries received on a marking will show up as the person-who-did-it's colour.

If the mark/injury/scar is received from an established soulbond, it will be the bond colour instead!

This can also affect the way an injury bleeds, as the blood can appear a mix of the injured person's colour and the soulbond colour.

A Soulbond is established through a moment of heightened emotion and physical contact between some of their markings.

This can be something like a sweet emotional confession, heartbreak, anger between two fighting rivals, or......another form of...intimate.....action-

The place where they were touching markings will now show their new bond colour after this moment and will last for about a day or two. This is how they can tell a bond has been established.

Now, whenever their soulbond makes contact with one of their markings, a mark will be left in their bond colour.

This coloured mark can last from a minute up to a day or so, depending on the intensity of the touch.

(This means like, a brush of the hand will not last as long as a slap across the face- or- the contact from a heavily intimate moment.)

Fixed Defects Will Become The Colour Of Their Soulmates Markings.

So for instance, I'll use Jeanist and Edgeshot as examples:

They both have one defective eye that shows up grey and awful looking- as soon as they are bonded, Jeanist's eye turns red and gathers a normal appearance, and Edge's turns blue!

Things like missing senses will show up as internal markings, and feelings will connect to the eyes and heart.

If a soulbond dies/gets turned into a soulless, the place that was their colour will turn to a grey version of their bond colour.

A painful reminder.

There is a Bond Percentage, that determines how perfectly the two souls fit together and how in sync they are, etc.

A low % does not mean that they aren't fit for each other, or that they are a bad coupling- It just means that their souls/defects/everything doesn't line up perfectly and that's perfectly normal :)

The average % is about 65% to 70%.

A "100% True Bond", as it is called, is so rare there have only ever been a few Bonds known with it, and it is often brushed off as not real or impossibly high standards-

(A 100% True Bond is a bond that means that they are literal other halves to each other, complete each other and are so in sync that they can actually utilise special abilities unique to their bond! -> no one knows that yet though)

(A very high bond can also tap into certain special abilities, but just not to the extent of a 100% True Bond)

(can you guess which two little gays just so happen to have a 100% true bond???)

All for One doesn't care for soulbonds and brushes it off as a trivial little thing that came with the formula and couldn't ever really do any harm or affect anything.

He openly mentions this.

He does not know that a very strong Soulbond is what's going to be the end of him....

Okay, so here's this!!! I may have missed some stuff, I do apologise if I have-

Feel free to send in any asks if you want me to elaborate on any of this!!

[sankta-starkova]

BURN IT DOWN

026; LAST NIGHT

previous chapter | next chapter | masterlist

summary: the one where harlow kaz realised that the world was going to end but she decided to try and save it with the people that she cared about, no matter what it takes

wordcount: 1.2k

Harlow looked at one of the only pictures that she had with Cassian. It was a picture of the two of them on the base, wide smiles on both of their faces.

She picked it up with a shaky breath, her thumb brushing over both of their faces as she thought about how simple that moment was.

There was a part of her that wished that she could go back to a time where the world wasn't ending in front of them and they didn't have to risk their lives for the rebellion.

But there had never been a time where she was not doinf something for the rebellion, where she was not being put down by the empire.

When she felt two hands wrap around her waist, she leaned back into his chest, feeling him against her.

"That's my favourite picture of you," he said and at this angle, he could rest his chin against the top of her head, "You just look so happy,"

She placed it back down, spinning around in his touch so that his hands were resting on her hips, "And I don't normally?" She asked teasingly and he smiled.

It was nice that he was able to smile when the world was falling apart at their feet. She could stare at his smile forever.

"No, it's just nice to be able to capture your smile forever," he said.

Cassian sighed as he looked at her, eyes trading the sharp curves of her face, the deep colour of her skin, the soft look in her eyes as she looked at him.

Her smile turned into a frown as she felt his stare on her. She could tell that he was ready to give everything he had for this mission and that worried her.

"Don't look at me like that," Harlow said, shaking her head.

"Like what?" He asked, thumb brushing against the bare skin on her waist from where her shirt had ridden up.

She sighed, looking at him, "Like we're not coming home," she said.

He noticed what he meant, a hand coming up to brush against her cheek, "We're not going to die," he said but she knew him well enough to hear the worry in his voice.

She reached up, placing her hand on top of his. She leant over, pressing a kiss against his wrist.

"We should retire after this, run away and live on a planet where the empire can never hurt us," he said.

She loved the idea of it just being the two of them forever in a little beach house, knowing that they were going to live to a ripe old age. But with the rebellion, that was never guaranteed.

She shook her head, "You know we would never be able to escape, not until the empire is gone," she explained.

Cassian sighed because he knew it was true. He knew that until the empire was gone them they could never have any peace.

There was a solemn silence that fell over them as neither spoke because neither knew what to say. This could be the end for them and she didn't wand it to be.

"Tonight I don't want to think about it," she said, pulling away from him but keeping her hand in his.

Harlow had gone through every bad thing that anyone could ever go through. She had lost everyone that she had ever lost and all she had left was him.

Cassian loved her more than anything else and she loved him too. They had the same horrors in their pasts and the same drive for the rebellion, even if they showed it in different ways.

"Okay, I won't even mention it," he said, looking into her eyes again. Even though she couldn't shake the feeling that he knew they would die whenever he looked at her, she cherished each moment.

"You won't?" She questioned, eyes wide as she looked at him.

"No, tonight, I'm making it all about you?" He said and with the grip he had on her wrist, pulled her back so she was pressed against his chest again.

He had a smirk on his face and she knew exactly what he wanted to do, to forget that anybody else in the world existed except for each other.

"Come on baby, I've been neglecting you with this big mission," He said, two fingers coming under her chin to pull her face up so she would look at him.

As he looked at the flustered expression on her face, it reminded him of the first time they had ever done something like this, the first time that his hands had explored her body.

She smirked at him once the initial shock wore off, one hand coming up to his chest to push him back against the bed.

He looked up at her and for the first time in the night, he wasn't looking at her like it was the last time, he was looking at her with complete and utterly lust.

So as she crawled up into his body as he laid on the bed and as she pressed a heated kiss to his lips, she was able to say everything that she was too afraid to say.

Too afraid to tell him that without him, she would have nobody and that without him, she would not know what to do with herself.

They weren't co-dependant or clingy. They could go weeks without seeing one another and then just jump back into what they had.

She took a shaky breath as she pulled away from their heated kiss, his teeth pulling on her bottom teeth, "Tell me what you want baby," he said, hand running over her flesh.

Harlow sighed, "Never let me go," She said and he nodded, pulling her flush against his body and not letting her go for the rest of the night.

Harlow was more ready than ever for the mission and she knew that whatever was going to happen was going to happen and there was no way to stop it.

As they stood in the ship, ready to sneak away and betray the rebellion, she knew that this could be the last mission that any of them went on.

Harlow looked out at the prepared faces of everyone there who knew that there may be no way back.

"May the force be with us," she said, looking out at the crowd.

They all nodded their heads and she looked at all of them. They were people she knew, old friends and new and they were all sacrificing their lives for the rebellion.

She walked up the ladder as the shuttle door closed, leaning over Bodhi's shoulder as they prepared to leave.

"Cargo shuttle, what's going on out there?" A rebellion voice said over the intercoms.

"Yes, yes we are," Bodhi stuttered, looking back at Cassian and Jyn who also stood in the cockpit.

"That's an impounded imperial ship. What's your call sign," They asked, nobody knowing what to say.

Bodhi looked around confused, "Rogue one," he said, nodding his head.

They heard a scoff come from the other side of the line, "Rogue one? There is no Rogue one," he said.

"There is now," Bodhi said as he pulls the lever, flying off into the distance and away from the rebellion.

There was a silence as they jump into hyperspace to get to Scarif because everyone knew that they may have just spent their last night on earth.

[robo-milky]

5. What type of canon character and/or OC do you think has good design? (And why?)

6.  What type of brushes do you usually use? :3c

5. What type of canon character and/or OC do you think has a good design? (And why?)

I don’t know if there’s a specific type of characters I like— but it’s all about the artstyle for me, but if I had to choose, maybe characters with hats? Berets, caps, etc— Generally speaking, I think hats or any kind of loud hair accessory gives a more distinct silhouette to characters.

This might depend heavily on the style, but I personally think a what makes a good character design is if you can either tell them apart by the silhouette OR if you stripped them of all clothes and shaved them bald (maybe even remove make up too). I prefer the latter because with how I see characters, they’re more than the way they happen to style their hair usually— I like to draw characters in outfits they wouldn’t normally wear— or try out different hairdos, so I like it when a character’s recognizability is innate.

((These are just my ideals— this is all about personal preference.))

6. What type of brushes do you usually use?

These three are my holy grail.

I’ve been using the yogurt series since my first day of using CSP— it’s so nice for colouring with soft and hard edges, I like the second one because of the way it can dramatically taper from thin to thick depending on pen pressure, and I like the third because it’s like a more solid version of the first pen.

I mainly use yogurt oil for colouring (it’s usually the only brush I use to colour), the second for line art, and the third for sketching/less serious works.

If I’m not using CSP, I’d go for whatever hard brush that can layer and blend.

If I’m talking traditionally painting, I believe in flat brush supremacy. It can go super thin and super wide— we stan a versatile queen. *Thin tipped brushes are cool, but I hate how unstable it is— maybe I’m just bad with brush control.*

Ask Game

[bozo-boy]

a retrospective of my art of 2022

i love that you can tell what i’m hyperfixating on judging by the art. more detailed explanations below the cut!

january

i started off 2022 with a redraw of a piece from april of 2021. for christmas of last year, i got an ipad and apple pencil, so this was largely me exploring procreate and the feel of a new way of drawing. there’s a lot about this one that i still like, particular chat noirs cute lil face, but there’s so much i would do differently now that i’m more comfortable with the medium.

february

i was still finding my footing with this one. i was really into fnaf, and naturally, monty. the shine on the ass was using one of the in-app stamp brushes, which was quite fun to play with. honestly, going back, i would just add more depth and complexity to this one. i stand by the bones of this one.

march

this one was done so i could have a fancy new pfp. to be completely honest, i’m not a fan of this one. it’s a redraw of a screenshot from the show itself, and even at the time i was unsatisfied with how this turned out. in retrospect, i would’ve started the sketch small and then scaled it up so it would look a bit more,, normal. i find my art comes out much better when i start small.

april

this drawing is for a worldbuilding project i like to work on when i’m not obsessed with anything else at the time. in this world, there’s a city with a whole festival for phoenixes, and a legend involving a raven falling in love with the sun, but i won’t get into that right now. if i’m remembering correctly, one of my references for this one was a swallow. i still like the way the sun shines through the feathers and the more painterly style. i still stand by this one 100%.

may

oh boy may. this was when my apple pencil broke, and lined up with me getting into sonic, after watching the movie. one of my friends sent me a picrew, birthing this little nameless character. i’m still quite happy with this one, i think i got the style really good while still making it a little bit my own. my short lived sonic hyperfixation is still visible in the way i draw eyes while sketching, which i think it pretty neat. i wonder if, had my apple pencil not broken, i would’ve gotten more into the franchise.

june

AHHHHHH. sorry, this is from when i got back into a set of my ocs, affectionately dubbed “the sin boyz”. they’re all based on the seven deadly sins, and this is asmodeus, embodiment of lust. he’s definitely the most fun to draw because of him being quite high energy, and i’d love to come back to these characters once again. i don’t have much to say about the drawing itself, other than still liking how cartoony it is.

july

i’m not entirely sure what sparked this, but i got really back into the arcana, a game which i’ve been into for years now. this little fella is my character for the game, named zephyr! this piece is actually based on a sketch from i think a few months earlier. i still like this one, with his cute little face. i adore how his eyes turned out, and i’d love to try returning to that style, even just to experiment.

august

this is actually a reference photo for zephyr, but i wanted to fully render it to try to demonstrate some of the fabric textures. i still adore just about everything about this, aside from how his face turned out. i’ve always struggled a little with placing eyebrows too close to the hairline, dating back to my art from when i was like,, 12, where the eyebrows would actually float above the head. aside from that, i still love this.

september

when i made this, i was actually rereading lucio’s route (i’m obsessed with it in a train-wreck way) and found the imagery of the player investigating his abandoned room super compelling. the background from this is actually from the game itself, which is something i had never done before. i even slightly edited the background the reflect some of his magical light! this one is much less colourful and saturated than my other stuff, and i have mixed feelings about it. still though, i’m proud of it, and i think this style of lighting is reflected in what i make today, even if the colours are out of my comfort zone.

october

this is probably one of my favourite pieces of ghost fanart i’ve made. the lighting is a little unpolished in relation to the smoke, but i couldn’t care less cause i just think it looks so freaking cool. i was directly inspired by mummy dust, both in the vision in my head when he growls “duuuuustl, but also in the green stage lighting when it’s performed on stage. i love how swirly the smoke looks, and even now, i’m obsessed with drawing characters lit from below. it’s one of my favourite things i’ve ever made.

november

so uh,, i was a very passionate voter in the american music awards, and the news of ghosts win was so wonderful. i, like many others, was and still am obsessed with the outfit tobias forge wore, and found it super inspiring. i was really worried about this one, cause i basically never draw real people and really wanted it to actually look like him while still being my art style, and i think i did pretty good. this was also new for me because it has two light sources! this presented a really fun challenge and i’m still so proud of this, aside from the lighting on the glass part of the award itself. also, three.

december

i got a new apple pencil for christmas! i immediately had to make something with it and the wonderful pressure sensitivity. i was mostly just playing around with this one, and doing back i’d change a few things, even if it’s only from a few days ago. nonetheless, i had a lot of fun here and really like the colours.

summary

oh boy i sure did draw this year! i think i’ve improved a lot, specifically in shading and rendering. i went outside of my comfort zone a lot with lighting, like things with multiple light sources and coloured light. next year, i wanna go outside of my comfort zone in different ways, particularly with things like backgrounds and character interactions. if you’ve read this far, i hope you enjoyed my self-analysis, and i hope 2023 brings you joy!

[teddyniffler]

Chapter 4

Day 4 and they finally let him out.

The door opened and Adam’s eyes flicked up towards the door, this morning was different to the last few, the person wasn’t carrying his breakfast on a tray “Would you like to come for breakfast Adam?” Adam blinked. He heard that correct, right? The past days had not been fun. His mouth had felt dry all the time. He couldn’t follow conversation very well whenever somebody came in to ask him questions. Workers had spoken to him, but he couldn’t remember his own replies. Slowly Adam stood. He didn’t put his shoes on, he just walked in his bare feet. To the bathroom. Adam leaned onto the sink as he brushed his teeth. The man watching him stayed in the corner of the room. Adam looked at himself in the mirror. His pupils looked so large. His eyes had dark shadows and if his hair had been worse before, now after 3 days of not brushing it, it was like a wild animal. And Adam didn’t care. He didn’t really feel anything anymore. He left the room with the man and was walked to a table and Adam sat down. “What would you like?” The nurse asked Adam “Anything solid” Adam said, his eyes unfocused on a spot on the table. He just stared at the pattern on the table, feeling so disconnected.

A plate of bacon sandwiches were placed down in front of him. He lifted his arms and ate. His left arm may have ached, but Adam didn’t seem to notice. Nor did he notice he was making a mess as half the bacon fell out of his slack grip. It was like floating. The other young people were looking at him, some whispered in their groups and looked over at him. Some avoided him completely, and Adam didn’t even notice. Everything was floaty, dreamy. He had counselling that morning. Doctor Theos found Adam still sitting at the table, even after breakfast had ended. Adam was watching everybody walking past, taking none of it in. He had a weird look on his face, almost smiling.

“Good morning Adam. It’s good to see you back on your feet” The doctor said brightly “Yeah” Adam replied, still smiling at nothing. His words were slower than normal “You have a counselling session with me. Shall we go to the room?” Adam carried on looking into space, then slowly got up, almost tripping over the lightweight stool he was sitting on. “Careful. Do you have your footing?” Adam walked behind the doctor. Everything looked bright. The colours seemed to pop, throwing his thoughts. The TV was making noise. He wanted to just sit and not be bothered by anybody. Or sleep. Sleep sounded good. “Would you like a drink? I can get you some orange juice if you’d like” “Yeah, thanks” Adam sat in the armchair between the small table between him and the doctor. It was a deep chair, soft. He put his feet up and placed his head on his knees while the doctor left the room for a moment. He was gone maybe two minutes before returning. Adam lifted his head back up “Feeling ok?” The doctor asked Adam Adam nodded “So the first thing I want to talk about is your little outburst the other day. Did you feel in anyway threatened by the guard? Did you feel triggered by something?” Adam listened to the doctor speak. He drank some of the juice and tried to stifle a yawn. The doctor had stopped talking “What did you say again?” Adam asked. The man repeated himself.

“I don’t know-“ Adam was having a hard time keeping up. His brain was so foggy. “Did you get enough rest while you were in your room?” “Um?” Adam rubbed his eyes. He sat forward. Tried to listen. “The side effects can be strong, you will tell us if they become too much for you” The man was speaking to Adam, but Adam couldn’t make out words “I’m sorry, can you say that again?”

“I said, Adam, do you miss Michael?” Adam mouthed the words ‘Michael’ his head titled down for a second, before lifting back up “I bet it must have been an awful shock to you when Castiel threw fire at the both of you” “Um mm..” Adam took another drink. Orange juice trickled down his chin “Is there something in this?” Adam mumbled “I feel ...” “How did it feel when the angels hurt you?” “How’d you ..think” Adam dropped the plastic cup on the floor. Orange soaking the carpet. He felt so drunk

“Tell me Adam. Sam. Do you hate Sam for throwing you into hell. He didn’t need to throw you in there. It was just meant to be him. Just him and Lucifer” “Sam?” Adam leaned back in the seat to steady himself, the room was swaying “Sam’s my brother. But he threw me into hell. He pushed me” “Then he left you didn’t he?” The doctor prompted, making notes in his book. “He did, he let the devil out, but not me and Michael” “And his friend set you on fire” The doctor pushed “He did” Adam nodded. His mouth open. “It hurt us” Doctor Theos leaned forward. His face was lined, as Adam watched, it went smooth and youthful. He looked like…somebody Adam knew. Blue eyes. Curly brown hair.

“It’s you…” Adam blinked hard. His eyes were so heavy “Tell me Adam, was it nice to hear Sam’s screams in the cage. When Lucifer hurt him, did his screams bring you pleasure?” Chuck smiled more. His eyes alive with malice. He looked hungry. Feral. “Do you want him to suffer?” Chuck whispered. “Do you want them all to suffer? I’m making them suffer Adam, does that make you happy?”

Adam giggled. He was nodding his head over and over. Chuck leaned in closer. His blue eyes inches from Adam’s “You loved hearing Sam scream as it meant you weren’t alone in being hurt. Michael hurt you didn’t he, didn’t he Adam?” “Yeah” Adam giggled. Tears running down his face. He kept giggling. Doctor Theos jotted some notes down. “Adam, I’m going to recommend we change your medication. I’m concerned you are showing signs of mania. I want you to have quite time this afternoon, you can go back to group therapy tomorrow.” Adam kept on giggling “I could hear it bubbling, his skin, it bubbled. The devil BBQed him alive and I watched.” Doctor Theos put down his book “I will have somebody escort you to your room.” Adam was still giggling as he left the room.

There had been three pills to take last night. Adam lifted himself from his bed, dragged himself to his feet. Everything was a blur. His teeth had been brushed, but he didn’t remember brushing them. He remembered eating, but not getting food. He was curled up on the sofa, his eyes on the TV but nothing was going to his brain. He didn’t remember how he got there. ‘Police last night arrested a man and a woman in their mid-30’s on suspicion of criminal damage linked to St Peter's Basilica’ The report showed the church, the news reporter came back on. Adam didn’t react. He didn’t move. He didn’t acknowledge anything. “- Thinking about Adam’s treatment plan” There was a voice. Adam knew who it was. It was Doctor Smiley. He was always smiling. Adam didn’t like his smile. Adam peered over the edge of the sofa. It took a lot of work. He felt exhausted just looking up. There he was, speaking to one of the many identical workers here. Did they all need to wear the same clothes? Adam allowed himself to fall back down. Landing on the soft arms of the sofa. He looked back at the TV “- Medication may not be successful in the long term-“ Adam yawed. “- Going to get a second opinion on neurosurgery-“ Adam frowned. That didn’t sound fun. “- Sometimes destroying the troubling brain tissue is for the best –“ Adam listened. Something from med school came into his head. Had he done a paper once before on neurosurgery in the past? “- Leucotomy. It’s for the best. I will get the plans approved at once-“

Adam jumped up. Doctor Theos was standing over him. “I will cut the bad tissue out. You may lose a lot of your personality; You will be an empty shell and you perhaps won’t be able to speak. There is a high chance you will lose all bodily functions and be a vegetable, but at least you won’t be seeing that evil God everywhere and saying such ridiculous claims”

Adam’s throat felt like it was closing. He went all hot and his heart beat faster. Tears dropped from his eyes. “You can’t! Im not insane, Im not! I’m telling you the truth” More tears trickled down his face. He started shaking. “We’ll place two large prongs into your eyes, just above the eyeball and push them into your brain. We’ll move them around a little, maybe send you a little electric current up there and it will all be over with. It won’t even hurt that much. When it passes through your eyes they may be only minor discomfort”

“No. No. NO!” Adam screamed. His sleepy state lifting in seconds. He knew in this moment it was fight or die. He couldn’t let them do this to him. He threw himself over the sofa and landed on Doctor Theos “YOU CAN’T! Please. Please” Adam was gasping for air. His chest felt so tight “You can’t” He choked out.

“Ok..Ok, I’m sorry dude ok?” Said the kid he had pinned under him Adam’s mouth opened in shock. He let go. Still sitting on the guy. A second later he was dragged off him. His arms pulled behind him again. He was lifted to his feet. Adam turned his head to look back. There was a boy standing where Doctor Theos was only seconds before “I only asked if it was ok to change the channel” The boy said to another Orderly. Adam was taken back to his room, the door clicking shut behind him. Adam continued to just stand there, his heart pounding. He slowly sank down the wall and sat there, bringing his legs up, hugging himself. What was going on? What was happening to him?

Adam sat there, and sat. He waited. Hours passed and then his door opened The doctor came in “What’s happening to me?” Adam asked, before the doctor could speak. Doctor Theos looked at Adam before speaking “You are very sick Adam, but as I said, its not a life sentence. With the right medication and time, we can make you better again” Adam swallowed “Did you really say you would do that? That you would damage my brain?” Doctor Theos looked surprised for a second, before opening the door again “I would never say that, nor would we ever dream to carry out any treatment as a Lobotomy. Adam, this place is a friendly and safe place. We don’t drill into our patients’ heads. Will you come talk with me please. I feel you may be spiralling into a dark place and I wish to help you.” Adam stood up and followed him. He rubbed his face, his tears had tried on his face and made it sore. The sitting area was rather quite, everybody had gone to their rooms. They walked into the counselling room. “Take a seat Adam. Let us have a talk. Can you explain what happened today please?” Adam tried to think, but his memories were so cloudy “I can’t really remember. I- I got up and I had breakfast and I think I watched TV all day, but I can’t remember, then I heard you saying you were gonna stick these things in my eyes and into my brain… You were right over me and I freaked out and then- Then there was some guy. I didn’t mean to attack him” Doctor Theos nodded. “This is a sign your delusions and hallucinations are getting worse. This is what your father told us when he brought you to us. You see things and believe they are real. You believe things happen to you when you are very safe. For week you have believed an evil God is trying to hunt you down and kill you. You even believed I was that God just yesterday in this room. You have believed you have half brothers who are serial killers and you will join them out in the world killing things. You believed you had an angel as a friend. I think all of that was a cry for help. You may have guessed now Adam, that you are very unwell. You can see now that, right?”

Adam nodded, tears running down his face and landing on his hands. He lifted his hand and rubbed, but the tears kept falling. “None of it was real… was it? Michael? He-he was never really here, was he? I don’t have brothers.. I’m really crazy, aren’t I?” Doctor Theos nodded. “Sometimes the truth can really hurt, but I’m here for you Adam. How about we get you back to your room. It’s medication time” Adam nodded, all the fight had left him. He felt empty. Hopeless. Walking back through the large room, Adam tried to take it all in. He was crazy after all. Everything he knew wasn’t real. It was just a trick his brain was playing on him. Adam took his pills without fuss and laid down on his bed. His sobs reached the doctor. Doctor Theos locked Adam’s door by swiping his card through the reader. He walked down the hall and back into the large room. He closed the door behind him and smiled.

He laughed. His hair turned brown and curly as Chuck resumed his true form “Ah man! That was fun!” The room shone bright as Chuck flew out of the empty warehouse he was holding Adam in, a slight bit of altering Adam’s mind was making him believe he was seeing the insides of a medical facility. Complete with a bunch of crazy kids Chuck had thrown in for fun. Acting as a doctor was fun and Chuck wanted entertainment. He flew up into Heaven. Landing in the throne room he lifted his head up high, white light shining down on the room. The Angels gathered in there fell to the ground in seconds. “Father” “Holy, is the Lord of hosts” “Father” “Praise Him, all His angels; Praise Him, all His hosts”

Chuck walked past the praising angels with totally disregard. They were nothing but robotic to him. Unable of a single independent thought among them. He marched down the hall, passing angels bowing to him as he passed, he passed into another hall before arriving at the cells. He looked into the first cell. Sitting with his wings wrapped around his body sat Michael. His head was bleeding. Blood has dried in his hair sticking some of it together. His skin was still rather red from the burns his father inflicted upon him. He was bleeding over his eyebrow. He lifted his face as he sensed his father looming over him. He was fully prepared for more pain, but it didn’t seem like he was going to get any today. His father looked gleeful.

“Adam doesn’t even believe in you now, yet you still won’t give up on him. You’re pathetic Michael. There was a time when you would do anything I asked. You were the good son. Now you’ve fallen just like your brother. Adam is going to rot and you will too. Give up hope already, you’re not getting out”

Chuck turned and walked away, he left the room and Michael tucked his head back into his wings, allowing them to enclose him once more. Once the wings were firmly over him. Michael opened his palms. Inside his hands was a tiny white light. A little part of Adam’s soul that came out when Chuck pulled Michael out. A part of Adam. Michael would never succumb to his father, not as long as he held Adam.