#can not comprehend how the pipes got that bad

[crimisin]

I'm sure everyone is holding their breath for a plumbing update so

good news, I once again have a working sink

all it took was 2 guys 4 hours and replacing 20 ft of pipe

[lvis44]

Cabin Fever - Pt. 3 // LH44

Lewis Hamilton x Y/N

Warnings: Swearing, Alcohol Consumption, Angst, Lewis being an ass, allusions to mental health struggles, 18+ MINORS DNI, not edited

Word Count: 5.3k+

Summary: He's your Sister in Laws best friend, you shouldn't even have to deal with him. Always seeming like a cocky arrogant prick, and now here he is crashing your family Christmas. Can you handle a full week of Lewis Hamilton? Or might he not actually be as bad as he seems?

Notes: A bit more drama for you guys tonight but this is nothing compared to what we've got coming up, oopsie lol. Hoping to get the next part out quickly so it kinda aligns with the holidays in real time! I would also formally like to start an important conversation about why the hell this man only seems to own winter jackets the color of a highlighter (im sure it's for safety when snowboarding but pls). I love you all and I'm so happy you guys are enjoying our angsty little Christmas fic!

As always, I am not a professional writer and all of this is a work of fiction and is strictly for fun. Enjoy!

**italics are a jump back in time**

The moment you make your way downstairs the next morning you are ready to turn and run back up to your room. You can hear everyone in the kitchen already, much to your surprise. Their voices are much louder than you would have wanted but you carry on, aware that the only way you’re getting coffee is by showing your face in there.

“Well good morning sleepy head! I was wondering when you’d show up.” Your dad greets you warmly.

“Hey I was up long before any of you yesterday.” You argue as he pulls you into a side hug.

“I do believe I was up before you.” Lewis pipes up with a smirk.

“Yeah yeah, whatever,” You grumble, trying to conceal the roll of your eyes but when you meet Lewis’ gaze you know you’ve failed, “I need coffee, lots of it.”

Tom laughs from over at the coffee bar where he seems to be making himself some sort of fancy espresso, “Coming right up.”

You thank him, taking a seat next to your brother at the island, watching the chaos ensuing on the other side of the kitchen. Your mother, Beatrice, and Vanessa are in what seems to be party planning mode. They’re rummaging through cupboards and running back and forth to the fridge, Vanessa has a notebook out creating some sort of list, Beatrice is loudly reading some recipe from her phone.

“How long has this been going on?” You ask the men at the counter, trying to keep your voice low.

“About twenty minutes, they’ve probably got another twenty in them.” Lewis says, picking up his coffee and watching the scene himself.

You let out a deep breath, already exhausted by the amount of energy flowing through the room, praying you don’t somehow get sucked into it as well.

“Y/N, thank goodness you’re up!” Vanessa says excitedly, finally noticing your presence on one of her trips around the kitchen.

“Good Morning.” You respond softly, trying not to allow any chance of being roped into whatever is going on.

“So,” Vanessa's voice comes out chipper and matter of fact as she puts her palms down on the counter, evidently ready to give you the full run down, “I felt so bad yesterday, I had so many things planned for a fancy breakfast and the weather just had to ruin it all so I really want to make up for all of it today. Thank you again for pulling that off yesterday, I was so grateful, but I want a big fancy family brunch, we haven't had one in so so long and I’ve been thinking about it since I started planning this trip. And I don’t want it to be our Christmas morning brunch, I want it to be its own special moment, ya know?”

You can tell that your eyebrows have gotten higher on your forehead with every word that she has said, speaking faster than you could ever comprehend at the early hour. You hear your brother take a deep breath from next to you as Lewis chuckles lowly.

“I’m sure it will be wonderful, very talented ladies doing the cooking.” Tom tells his daughter before setting a delicious smelling cup of coffee down in front of you, “Here you go Y/N.”

“Thank you, it smells fantastic.” You say sincerely, happily wrapping your chilly hands around the warm cup.

“It better, I brought my own beans and everything. That should be the best cup of coffee you’ve had in your life.” He tells you proudly.

“It was a phenomenal cup of coffee.” Lewis says with an amused smile on his face, one that Tom seems to read as more genuine than you think it really is.

“Very good, very very good.” Dylan is quickly agreeing.

“Now listen,” Vanessa’s voice is quick to grab your attention again, “you did such an amazing job yesterday with breakfast and then helping with all the storm cleanup,”

Before she can finish Lewis lets out a sound halfway between a laugh and a scoff, cutting her off, “I don’t know if I would call whatever she was doing yesterday helping.” His voice is muffled by the rim of his coffee mug but you can hear the cheek to his voice, more teasing than the jabby tone it usually carries for you, you assume it's because of the current company.

You open your mouth to defend yourself but your brother is joining in quickly, “I mean she made a valiant effort but I do think I have to agree with Lewis on this one.” He’s laughing as he pinches at your side.

You try to find the right words to argue your defense but you realize you really can’t, thinking back to your ways of helping the day before. 

You had started strong, initially heading out after breakfast to try to clean up all the branches that had been blown into the yard, that lasted for only twenty minutes before Lewis and Dylan were getting the plow and skidoo out of the garage. Once the big toys were out you had no more interest in your handheld rake and shovel. You had gone over to inspect the new fun equipment but were quickly shooed away by both Lewis and your brother, both claiming you were going to get in the way and possibly end up hurting yourself. You had accepted defeat, heading back to your sad pile of branches before once again getting quite distracted by the fun sound of the engine on the skidoo. You had done your best to act as if you were still working but you had ended up watching Lewis zip around the yard for much longer than you would have liked to admit. There was something about his level of both control and chaos behind the handlebars that scratched your brain just right and it irked you and brought you immense satisfaction all at once. Once your brother had gotten into the swing of plowing, Lewis following him down the hill to keep Vanessa's mind at ease, you had gotten back to your sad attempt at branch removal, by the time they made it back up to the house you were collecting your armful. 

“Y/N you do know that it’s been a full hour and you don’t even have enough sticks to make a mouse a campfire, right?” Lewis had taunted you when he saw you walking across the driveway as he removed his goggles, your brother laughing as he hopped out of the plow.

“Oh fuck off, at least I was doing something, you were just joyriding.” You said sassily, quickly changing course so you weren’t walking directly past him.

“I,” He started, his voice long and drawn out to dramatically make his point, “was keeping your brother safe. The buddy system is very important, you know.”

“A knight in shining,” You started to say but before you could get the whole sentence out you were falling flat on your ass, your abysmal stick pile flying everywhere.

“Woah Y/N, shit you alright?” Your brother was quick to react, leaving his open truck door to run over to you.

“You’ve gotta be kidding.” Lewis huffed out, also quickly making his way over to you.

They had both been there within an instant, squatting next to you to make sure you were alright. Your brother was handling you like fine china even though he could tell you were okay, Lewis however was immediately giving you shit.

“You do realize we’ve been here for like twelve hours and this is the second time you’ve fallen in front of me, right?” The tone of his voice was unamused despite offering you his hand to help pull you up.

“I did not fall last night.” You had tried to defend yourself as he got you to your feet, your brother still giving you a worried look like he thought you had secretly broken something.

“Because I caught you.” He had quickly pointed out.

“Whatever.” You grumbled as you bent down to collect your stick pile, admittedly leaving a good half of them behind before once again heading toward your brother's brush pile off by the shed. Before you could even make it half way, a very well aimed snowball was colliding with your ass cheek, once again knocking the sticks out of your arms. 

“I am going to fucking kill you.’ You had exclaimed loudly, quickly gathering a large armload of snow to form into your own snowball before turning around and whipping it in their direction. You ended up hitting your brother, immediately feeling a little bad because you assumed it had come from Lewis in the first place. Lewis let out a cackle when the snowball hit your brother, evidently pleased that he hadn’t been the one to get in trouble.

“Oh hell no, that was meant for you.” Dylan had said, also laughing but incredibly serious, his own snowball already being packed tightly to whip at Lewis. Much to your pleasure, Dylan was much closer to Lewis and was much stronger than you so you could tell the impact didn’t feel amazing when it finally slapped into his chest.

“I just thought you should put some ice on it after that fall, I was trying to be helpful.” Lewis laughed as he put his arms up to guard himself from any further snowballs being sent his way. You and your brother exchanged a look, both of you loading up again, hurling snow in Lewis’ direction.

He screamed as he turned to run, his snow gear making him much less agile than he would normally be. He had finally found steady footing, his own snowballs being sent in both of your directions, all three of you in a fit of laughter. Somewhere along the line your alliance with your brother had crumbled, his snowballs being sent your way as well, no longer reserved for just Lewis. By the time you finally called truce you had all been absolutely soaked, your stomachs hurting from laughing so hard and your pile of sticks long forgotten. When you made your way back to the house you had found yourself very surprised at how playful and fun that time with Lewis had been but you decided that it must have been a bit of a fluke, knowing it wouldn’t last the rest of the day.

You try to think of a way to argue your defense but you have to admit to yourself that you really can’t, you truthfully didn’t do any actual storm cleanup yesterday.

“It’s the thought that counts, I tried.” You grumble into your mug as the two men laugh.

“Well, either way, you absolutely slayed it with breakfast and putting up with them,” Vanessa gives you a smirk, trying to take away their ammunition, “so I want you to just relax this morning, Moms and I will take care of all things brunch, you just enjoy the pretty scenery and your amazing coffee.”

You smile at her, mouthing a thank you, grateful that you are not expected to be part of the brunch circus that is unfolding in the kitchen before you. Your mother and Beatrice are still frantically figuring out if they have everything for some recipe that they have selected. You sit back, watching as Vanessa returns to her chaos with your mothers, seeming weirdly at home within it. Tom and your father begin loudly discussing just where Tom is sourcing his coffee beans, raising the volume of the kitchen just that much more. You go to turn to your brother, only to find him standing from his seat to rinse out his coffee cup. Lewis is grabbing his phone and eagerly taking a call, leaving the room rapidly. You let out a sigh, choosing to make your way into the den with your coffee, hoping for some level of peace in there. The room is cozy, a fire already going and a light snow falling outside the large windows. You try to settle into one of the plush couches but as you sit there you feel yourself growing more and more aggravated. On one side you can hear your family in the kitchen, all talking loudly about different subjects that don’t even meld together into anything coherent, on the other side you can hear Lewis’ muffled voice on the phone. You can’t actually make out anything that he’s speaking about but the low timbre is enough to be disruptive. You find it hard to believe that in a house of this size you can’t find any silence, yet here you are, you shouldn’t be shocked with it being your family. You decide you can only take so much and come to the conclusion that you would rather be out in the cold and quiet than in here with the chatter. You take your coffee and head off to the foyer to find your winter gear to bundle up, the better idea of just going to your room nowhere to be seen in your head. You get as cozy as possible, grabbing a blanket out of the den before heading back to the kitchen.

“I think I’m just gonna go sit out back for a little while and appreciate the view while I have my coffee.” You awkwardly announce as you make your way to the backdoor, raising your blanket in your hand as you do.

“That sounds absolutely lovely, enjoy yourself!” Beatrice exclaims, overly enthusiastic about your plans.

When you first step out of the house you begin to question your plans, the cold air immediately hitting your face and wrapping you in an unforgiving cocoon, but the moment the door closes behind you, you’re at peace. The door seals your family and their loud chatter away wonderfully, just the gentle howl of the wind and small noises of things falling in the forest left to be heard. You make your way across the covered deck, settling into one of the luxurious outdoor couches overlooking the large backyard and forest. You snuggle as far as possible into your blanket, trying to keep as much of your body heat as possible. You can feel a deep sigh leave your body as you take in your surroundings, admitting to yourself that as much as you hate winter, you do love the beauty of the blanketing of snow. You sit in silence for a while, just sipping your coffee and enjoying the peaceful way the world is waking up, the snow falling gently. It sadly doesn’t take long for your silence to be interrupted, the door opening behind you. You let out a huff when you see who is making their way outdoors.

“Ocupado.” You say sassily as you turn your attention back out to the view in front of you.

Lewis just scoffs, making his way over to sit on one of the couches near you.

“Seriously, I just need some silence. Do you have nowhere else to go?” You groan childishly, seeing him settling into his seat.

“I let you get warm in front of my fire yesterday, I think you can share the silence of your deck with me now.” He says, his voice just as sassy.

You go to argue with him, wanting to tell him that it’s not the same and his fire was in the den, a common area, but you quickly realize that this too is a common area that you have no monopoly over. You decide to bite your tongue, rolling your eyes as he settles deeper into the couch, pulling his phone out. You decide to do the same, feeling awkward staring into the trees now that you have company. It doesn’t take long before the first post from a friend is popping up on your feed. She is back in California, a small party dress on that would have you getting hypothermia here. The post is about a party that you had known would be happening, a fun Christmas get together with a bunch of your friends that you would have loved to have been at, carefree and ridiculous fun. You let out a huff as you scroll through her post, the fomo eating you alive as you do so.

“Thought you wanted silence.” Lewis grumbles from his spot at the sound of your huff, his voice already laced with annoyance. 

“So sorry to disturb you, your highness.” You fire back at him sarcastically.

“It’s just sir, I’m a knight, not technically royalty.” He replies, his voice so cocky that it makes you want to smack him, only stopping when you see the slightly teasing smirk on his face.

You roll your eyes again, not even having the energy to come up with something witty to say back to him in the moment.

“Seriously though, what’s got you in such a mood?” He asks, sounding genuinely curious, much to your surprise. 

“I’m not in a mood.” You mutter, burrowing further into your blanket, your attention back on your phone.

He lets out a chuckle at your response, “Yeah the huffing and puffing really sells that narrative well.”

“Oh shut up, you know I don’t particularly want to be here, just let it go.” You say quietly, not wanting your family to hear your disdain for your surroundings.

“I know, and me being here probably isn’t helping that, but it seemed like there was something else going on. Thought you saw something that was upsetting you.” He says casually, shrugging like it’s a normal conversation for the two of you to be having.

You’re taken aback by his casual and genuinely curious nature, not being used to anything like this from Lewis. It takes your guard down, quicker than it should. You let out a sigh, deciding, against your better judgement, to confide in him a little bit. You know he could come back with some level of snippy remark but you were prepared for that, maybe he would actually have a normal conversation with you for once. 

“Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, but seeing everyone enjoying their lives as adults and doing what they want, where they want, I don’t know, it’s just driving me a bit insane.” You divulge, not getting your point across in quite the way you meant to.

He raises an eyebrow at you, evidently rather confused by what you mean, “I mean, you’re an adult, you spend 99% of the year doing what you want, where you want. What’s the problem?”

You just shake your head, deciding to instead show him the post that caused the initial huff. You watch as his brows furrow while he scrolls through the instagram post you handed him. Quickly his face turns from curious to judgemental. It’s his turn to roll his eyes as he finally hands you your phone back.

“So you’d rather be back in the smog of LA where you can’t even tell it’s Christmas, dressed in a skimpy dress with your friends? You’d prefer that to fresh mountain air, a white Christmas, and your family that loves you?” His tone is belittling as he reads the situation completely incorrectly, his questions coming out more as statements, as if nothing that you say now will change his mind.

Your jaw drops at the accusation, a loud scoff leaving your throat as you snatch your phone back from him, “How dare you, that was not the point I was trying to make.” You begin to argue before he’s cutting you off.

“You see those people all the time Y/N, how often do you see any of your family?” He raises his brow in challenge but doesn’t give you time to formulate a response before he’s carrying on, “We all know you don’t want to be here, just suck it up, a little bit of winter mountain air and family time isn’t going to kill you.” He doesn’t wait for a rebuttal, he just stands from his seat as if he’s just finished reprimanding a child and walks away, back inside.

He leaves you in your seat, silent and fuming but also leaving you feeling a tad guilty. He is correct, you don’t want to be here, but it has nothing to do with you preferring to be out in a skimpy dress in LA, it’s about your freedom. Having the freedom to do as you please and be where you want, something you haven’t had a ton of in your life. You hate that everyone knows that you would prefer to be somewhere else, making you feel as if you’re almost a burden. You hate that Lewis feels that he has the right to make such deep assumptions about you and treat them as fact and you hate even more that he feels he has the right to lecture you based on those assumptions. 

You end up staying out on the back deck much longer than you had originally planned, only finally making your way back indoors when Vanessa announces that brunch is served. You do your best to ignore him, not even looking in his direction. Instead you spend most of brunch quizzing Vanessa on things about her brunch that in all honesty you aren’t particularly interested in, but listening to Vanessa explain how he gets her eggs to fluffy is much better than having to even think about dealing with the man sitting at the other end of the table.

It irks you that you can hear him chatting so freely and happily down the table, as if he hadn’t accosted you on the porch mere hours beforehand. You find yourself already making a plan for escape before you’ve even cleared your plate.

Avoiding him throughout the rest of the day ends up being shockingly easy. You take an extra long time getting ready before helping Vanessa and your mom with some last minute gift wrapping. You can’t help but laugh when you see that Vanessa's “last minute stuff” actually appears to be a majority of her gifts, but you don’t complain, knowing it will take up more of your time, and in turn help in your game of avoidance. You can hear Lewis chatting off in the distance, your father quizzing him eagerly on his car collection after hearing he added something new. Lewis gushed with ease, thoroughly entertaining your fathers questions and while it could be considered a nice conversation you felt like it sounded arrogant, flashy. 

“Boys and their toys.” Your mom muttered with a laugh, also listening to bits of the conversation, your father now seemingly showing Lewis photos of a car he had back in the nineties.

“Tell me about it, I couldn’t for the life of me get Dylan out of that plow truck when we first bought it and the snow hadn’t even fallen yet.” Vanessa exclaims, shaking her head.

You just laugh as you lean back to stare out the window for a moment, admiring the way the world is beginning to turn blue as the sun goes down. As if he’s noticed it getting dark at the very same moment, Dylan is bursting into the room talking about Christmas lights.

“Get out, we are not finished in here Mr.” Vanessa is quickly squealing, throwing her body in front of the few remaining unwrapped gifts.

“Okay, okay,” Dylan laughs, throwing his hand over his eyes before continuing, “What I was saying is the lights in the forest look like they stayed up through the storm! It’s getting dark so I was hoping we could all take a walk out there, it’ll be beautiful.”

“That sounds nice Dyl, give us just a little time to get ready.” You say softly, eager to see the lights that have your brother so excited.

“Sweet, I’ll go let the guys know.” He says like a little kid, whipping around to go inform them of the new plans.

“He made an absolute wonderland out there, you guys are going to love it.” Vanessa says, already standing up to collect the remaining wrapping paper, shoving things away like she’s now on a time crunch.

You take that as your sign to go change and get ready for a winter walk. When you go to head upstairs you finally cross paths with Lewis who seems to be headed to his own room, you pause for a moment before flicking your gaze away and trying to move past him.

“Joining us on the walk?” He asks, his voice cold, sounding like he’s expectant of a no.

“Uh, yeah, of course.” You waver slightly, caught off guard that he had any words for you at all. You wished your voice had come out stronger, not wanting him to feel like he had any sort of upperhand, that he had gotten under your skin.

He does actually look surprised, his eyebrows twitching up in a certain judgemental look of disbelief before he is once again turning on his heel. He doesn’t say a word, just walks away to his bedroom.

When you make your way back downstairs, everyone is there and waiting. Dylan is animatedly explaining how he set up with power for the lights and how they follow all of the groomed paths in a certain pattern. Once he notices that you’re there he is directing everyone to follow him to the back yard, still explaining his tree lighting process on the way. You can’t help the grimace that leaves your body when you step outside, the temperature having dropped drastically since you were out here earlier. You try to just burrow further into your coat, not wanting to complain after being made so aware of your attitude earlier today.

As you wander the paths you find yourself mesmerized, Vanessa was right about the absolute wonderland of it all. The glittery lights look like stars, spanning higher up trees than you would like to think about your brother being, but regardless they are breathtaking. You find yourself falling away from the group a bit, too caught up in admiring the gorgeous trees and trying to keep as much of your warmth in as possible. Your family carries on walking, unaware of your sudden slow pace, Lewis however seems to notice and slows down himself. So much that you almost trip over him, having been blissfully unaware of his presence.

“You okay?” He asks you when you’re steady on your feet.

“I’m just fine Lewis.” Your voice is as cold as the outdoor air as you avoid looking in his direction.

“Well, from where I’m standing, you’re shaking like a leaf.” His tone has lost its earlier harshness but still carries that bit of arrogance as you catch him smirking at you out of the corner of your eye.

“Just wore the wrong jacket, I’ll be fine.” You argue, keeping your voice short but still pulling your thin jacket tighter. You're mentally cursing yourself for not having worn your puffer.

“Do you want to head back? I’ll walk with you.” His offer catches you off guard, his voice sincere and almost kind as he continues to stare at you, the smirk gone.

“I’m fine,” You say yet again, your voice slightly quieter now, “Dylan worked hard on this, I’ll survive.”

Just as you once again reiterate your argument a gust of wind comes through, picking up the loose snow and blowing it around you sending yet another chill directly down your spine. Lewis evidently notices the cold seeping deeper into your bones, taking it upon himself to make the decision. 

“Y/N and I are gonna head back to the house, she’s getting a little too cold, gonna get her something warm, we’ll see you guys in a bit.” He yells ahead to your family against your will. 

“Oh, hun, are you okay?” Your mother is immediately concerned.

“I’m fine, I’m not going back.” You start to insist but Lewis is stepping in yet again.

“She’s fine, just wore the wrong jacket. The lights look amazing Dylan, well come see them when she’s warmed up.” Before you can say anything he’s starting to usher you back down the path, Dylan is thanking him and Vanessa is telling you where to find more blankets. 

Lewis is guiding you down the path, his body close against your back and his grip firm on your waist as if you don’t know the way. You hate the way he is manhandling you but you have to admit you are relishing in the warmth coming from the proximity. You don’t allow it to go on for too long, wrenching yourself out of his grip once you’re far enough away from your family. You pick up your pace, both in a show of defiance and actually quite wanting to get back to the warmth of the house. You hear him let out a scoff behind you as you throw your little tantrum.

The heat of the house is immediately welcoming, wrapping around you like a hug the moment you open the door. You take a moment to let the heat sink into your bones before even moving to remove your jacket. Lewis stands there watching you for a moment, just shaking his head before taking off his own large puffer.

“What?” You groan, assuming he has a comment to make.

“You know sub zero temps usually require a little more than a flimsy fashion jacket from the mall, right?” His voice is laced with judgement again, the kindness from the forest long gone.

“Oh, would you just fuck off!” You finally properly snap, whipping your head to face him.

““I’m just saying you’re a grown adult and you’re acting like winter is gonna kill you, you can’t even prepare for it” His response is quick, his tone just as snippy as yours, dripping with arrogance.

“I have a fucking parka in my room, I didn’t know how cold it was.” You throw back at him.

“Mmm sure, or you just wanted to look good for the little walk.” He accuses you, his tone condescending.

“Look good for who? I’m in the middle of fucking nowhere!” You fully yell at him, finally done with his jabs.

He ignores the question, his voice raising but not yet actually yelling, “Have you ever considered that maybe it’s good for you to be in the middle of nowhere once in a while?”

“I do not need some asshole who doesn’t even know me giving me fucking life advice, thank you very much.” You snap, no longer yelling but your voice is harsh.

“Well maybe you do because from where I’m standing you would rather be back in LA partying with your friends to post on Instagram than at your brother's beautiful new house with your whole family that loves you. They fucking want you here and you get to fucking see them, stop acting like its pulling fucking teeth for you to be here.” He actually yells this time, momentarily stunning you.

“Why do you even fucking care so much?” You just about scream, praying that your family is still far away from the house. The two of you haven’t even made it out of the foyer yet.

He just stares at you, his eyes hard and his chest heaving slightly. He opens his mouth before quickly snapping it shut, finally letting out a long, deep sigh. “Ya know what, I guess I fucking don’t. Go take a hot shower before you get fucking hypothermia.” He finally mutters harshly as he storms out of the room, his bedroom door slamming shut not long after.

You stand in the foyer, staring down the hallway where he disappeared, still dressed in your winter jacket. You can feel the tears pricking in the back of your eyes, immediately pissing you off that they can be caused by even Lewis. You bite lips, willing the tears to stop, but then you realize, there it is.

It finally feels like Christmas.

[kittyball23]

Snapped (a Trolls fanfic)

Summary: Engaged in an argument with his brothers, Branch allows 20-years of pent up anger to release

A/N: Based on an idea that I really liked by @pixarchan and taking place right before the oneshot "By Your Side" :)

_______________________________

“You LEFT me. I was ALONE. How can I call you my brothers?”

Branch’s voice was hard and unforgiving as he spoke, his blue eyes cold. He glared at John Dory, Spruce, and Clay, the guys who were supposed to be, as Poppy described it, "friends who could never leave you." “Why would ANYONE do something awful like that to their ‘family’?” he demanded to know.

“How could you have been alone, Branch?” John Dory asked, frowning in confusion. “Grandma was with you!”

“Grandma DIED!”

This made JD go stiff. “Wh…what?”

“Branch,” Spruce piped up uncertainly, “when did - “

“When did it happen? Pfft. A couple of years after you left. She waited EVERY DAY hoping you guys would come back, and she suffered a miserable death at the hands of a bloodthirsty Bergen with that hope NEVER fulfilled. And I had NOBODY after that…" Branch felt pain crawl into him remembering those nights that he could hear his Grandma cry, missing her other grandsons, dying still wondering what had become of them. Did his brothers even think about her? Or about what would’ve become of him for that matter, if something bad was to happen… as it had?

At that moment, the three brothers were speechless, horrified to hear what had happened to their youngest of the bunch. JD looked confused, as though he couldn’t comprehend that there was anything bad that possibly could’ve happened to him after the band had broken up and gone their separate ways. Spruce looked down at the ground in shame, feeling his heart clench for his late grandparent. Clay rubbed his arm, his ears drooping slightly in the sadness of it all.

“Branch, I - I mean…” Clay had begun to stutter.

“We didn’t know!” JD blurted.

“Yeah, I can see that. That’s pretty obvious,” Branch spat. “In fact, you guys don’t know a LOT of things. Like what it does to your baby brother when you go off and do something like ABANDON him!”

“But we didn’t mean - “ Spruce tried to defend, but had been cut off.

“Oh, what, you didn’t mean it? Yeah right. All you did was think about nobody but yourselves…”

Spruce grimaced, knowing that Branch was right. As a teen, he wasn’t thinking about the long-run of things. Clay wasn’t either. And neither was John Dory. All they’d seen was the present, what had been happening to them right there and then on the night they broke up. They’d focused on the failure, breaking the code that they’d kept among themselves in the process by putting ‘shows before bros’ instead of the other way around. And it in turn had caused them lots of hurt and regret.

“Branch! Where are you going?” John Dory called out, noticing that Branch had turned from them and was walking away.

“Far, far away… from YOU!” he called back.

JD suddenly felt frustrated. He frowned and spoke out at Branch again. “Y’know, I’m here trying to get this to work out, and here you are making things more difficult. I know what we did wasn’t cool, what else do you want me to do or say? Huh? Look, I’m sorry for what we did and for whatever else got your diaper in a knot, all right!” He huffed and crossed his arms, not understanding why Branch couldn’t just get over something that happened a long time ago… and also not noticing the way his younger brother had tensed - fists clenching, a slight tremble running through him - as he slowly turned around to face JD, an eye slightly twitching.

“It’s not enough,” Branch hissed. In it was an undertone of warning that clearly rang out Now leave me alone! Spruce and Clay got it, and they exchanged a nervous glance with one another, wishing their oldest brother would stop playing with fire. Though John Dory, clueless to social cues, did not heed the warning.

“Now you’re really acting like a baby! JD snapped, unable to believe how uncooperative his brother was being. "And not to mention crazy," he added as a mutter under his breath. The way he saw it, he'd already apologized and Branch still didn't forgive them? If that wasn't crazy, he didn't know what was!

But it seemed that he would quickly be informed.

“You wanna see CRAZY?!”

JD had hardly processed Branch’s words, when the Troll had already charged at him, a fist colliding with a resounding crack! against his jaw.

He reeled back in shock, losing his balance and falling backwards with an "OW!"

"How's THAT for crazy?" Branch screamed at him, jumping on top of him and finally allowing the two-decades worth of pent-up anger release.

“It’s crazy that you think I’d actually be happy to see you again! It’s crazy that we’re on this dangerous trip! It’s crazy that you think ONE apology is going to fix everything! It’s crazy that you guys left thinking that I’d be okay! It’s crazy that you NEVER CAME BACK!!”

Branch tussled with his oldest brother, the two of them rolling around on the ground in a messy heap, each trying to overpower the other, fists and kicks flying from every direction, with Branch intent on landing another blow, while JD fought back in defense, trying to break free from his little brother's surprisingly strong hold. Clearly, it wasn’t easy, and Branch managed to gain the upper hand.

"Stop it, Branch! You're hurting me!" JD  protested, desperately flailing his hands and trying to pry Branch of. But Branch wouldn't budge.

"Then maybe you should've thought about how you hurt ME!" He grabbed JD by the shoulders, lifting him up and slamming him down. He'd just managed to slink his hands around his neck and was prepared to strangle him, when Branch felt a tight grip on the back of his vest yank him back roughly.

"Bro, that's ENOUGH! Calm down!" Spruce clutched Branch tightly, stepping back and holding him in place from attacking anymore, while Clay hurried over to JD and began to help him get off the ground.

But Branch wasn't done. Shooting his hair out, he whipped it around JD’s neck and choked him. A loud sound came from between JD’s lips as he tried and failed to get air into his throat, before gasping and coughing hard, sputtering ineffectively in a panic. The fury on Branch's face only served to make that panic even worse.

"I said that's ENOUGH!" Spruce shouted out again, using all his strength to tear Branch away again. The blue Troll struggled fiercely, not satisfied with his restraint and making animalistic noises. His fists were still flying out, trying to land a hit. When he realized he wasn't going to, he stopped, but continued to glare murderously at JD who stood by Clay's side in utter surprise for what had happened.

Spruce waited another minute after Branch had stopped struggling to let go of him. As soon as he did, Branch turned and stormed off without another word.

"Branch..."

The whisper of his name had come from Poppy. She’d stayed clear of the fight but had witnessed it all unfold, horrified to see how things had turned out. Branch needed her support now more than ever. She hurried off after him, while Spruce and Clay tended to JD.

“Ugghhh, I think he broke it,” JD moaned, grabbing at the side of his face where Branch’s fist had collided.

Clay sighed, letting JD lean against him as they began to walk over to the caterbus. “Come on, bro. Let’s get you fixed up.”

______________________________

A/N: My working title for this was "Branch vs JD mortal combat" asdoasjgmaiodfugnsdih

[adleryoung]

"My Lord," Petunia piped up. "No one will dispute that the depraved charlatan Reverend O'Hoppity needs to be 'taken down,' as you so aptly put it, but how exactly do you plan to do this?"

"Simple," I explained. "We spread the word and make his disgusting predilections public knowledge."

"Will the public listen?" Gretchen asked. "Do we have any physical evidence to show them?"

"Do we need any?" I retorted. "If the mob was so easily persuaded to go through with this preposterous witch trial, it shouldn't take much to make them believe this. Especially since this is actually true."

"I beg your pardon, my Lord," Chloe interjected, "but I think you place too much value on truth. The credibility of an accusation has less to do with what's being alleged and more to do with who is saying it. No one took Didelphis's claims seriously until the Parson got involved."

"Hmmm," I murmured as I tried to comprehend the intricacies of lowfolk interaction. How did they ever get anything done when it was impossible to trust each other? "The evidence will need to be irrefutable, and we'll have to produce it with a dramatic reveal. Ixie, I assume there is evidence?"

"We saw him in the act," the Ixie reported with a shudder. "Oh how the sight of it will forever haunt me! He storeth his supplies and a journal of horrendous shadowy exploits in his home, but we spied him performing his private puppet show in the back of the church."

"WHAT??" Rebecca blurted. "Sacrilege! That pompous, lying, heretical hypocrite was acting out his depraved fantasies on holy ground??"

"Calm yourself," I exclaimed. "We'll get him. He will have to face Fuma's justice in the end."

"Can I go gut him now?" Burnside asked eagerly. "After learnin' this, I reckon you gotta let me."

I shushed Burnside as another Ixie flew up and saluted.

"Our mission has been successful," she reported. "We found several bottles of booze and doused the unconscious rabbits according to thy orders."

"Excellent!" I chuckled.

"We also took care to make it look like the rabbits were responsible for stealing the booze."

"Good thinking!" I nodded.

"And we arranged all the rabbits in compromising positions that will certainly not be socially acceptable in Bunkirk."

"Uh, okay," I blinked.

"And we put one of them in a dress."

"Why?"

"It seemed like a good idea," she shrugged. "Twas not easy to do, but surely it will make them all look bad in the eyes of the search party that findeth them."

Another Ixie flitted up and gave a salute. They were being so professional! I suppressed a grin and ordered the new arrival to give her report.

"Ash Marten is ready to speak, but he is not happy," she stated succinctly.

I picked up the original Mumble-Mug and pulled the string taut. "Hello?"

"My liege," Ash greeted me sarcastically. "You know, I can certainly empathize with your desire to be the primary driving force behind your own rise to power, but the first thing I saw when I got back from my mission - setting up contacts and training story tellers, if you recall - the first thing I saw was an angry mob clamoring for a witch trial, under circumstances that clearly betray your involvement. This does not inspire confidence."

"The child Didelphis is actually the old crone Didelphis transmogrified," I explained.

"That much is obvious," Ash retorted. "What puzzles me is why she was reportedly living with Oonagh."

"She sassed me at the coven meeting," I elaborated. "I thought it would be a fitting (as well as funny) punishment to turn her into a child and have her adopted by her arch enemy."

"If you ever make it onto the throne," Ash remarked after a pause, "I believe you may be an extremely interesting Emperor. Be sure to write down your thought processes. Future historians will want to study them."

"You think so?" I quipped, trying to stay cool but actually feeling a little flattered.

"I have a lot to do here," Ash sighed. "There isn't time for chit-chat. I assume you have an interest in the outcome of the trial."

"I need for Oonagh to be exonerated, and Didelphis spared too, if possible."

"That's a tall order," he muttered. "I might be able to get the accused acquitted, since she is in fact innocent … but this mob wants blood."

"We have an ace in the hole," I whispered. "The main accuser, Reverend O'Hoppity of Bunkirk, is a secret devotee of … shadow puppetry."

I expected Ash to gasp, but instead it was I who gasped when he said, "I know."

"You know?"

"Who do you think introduced the Parson to that disreputable hobby?"

I stood there, dumbfounded, and after an uncomfortably long silence, Ash continued.

"This is what's called 'leverage' in my line of work. If you can corrupt a prominent citizen, then you have power over him."

"And now we expose him to win the trial!" I exclaimed.

"We do nothing of the sort," Ash scolded. "O'Hoppity is a valuable resource I've spent years cultivating, and I'll not throw him away on something as trivial as this. No, we use our knowledge and the threat of exposure to manipulate him, and we do it in a way that ensures he will continue to be useful to us in the future."

"That's blackmail!" I declared.

"Good, you're learning some of the terminology," Ash chuckled.

[lemonwrap]

Teeth & Tongues - Chapter 21

Read it on Ao3!

Soap wakes up with a loud, involuntary “Huh?” as something shakes him awake. He pries open his eyes to see Ghost still sitting in his chair like the mother hen he is, hand on his arm. 

Doctor, Ghost takes his hand off and signs, and it takes Soap a minute to comprehend what he said. He scratches his hair with his uninjured hand and smooths it like it’ll help his chronic bedhead situation. 

“Hey, doc,” he says when he sees the new person in the room, beginning to sit up. 

“Sargeant MacTavish,” she says. She’s shorter than the both of them, but she has blue eyes and graying hair. She reminds him a bit of his mother. “I’m Dr. Sampson. How are you feeling?”

“Okay,” he replies.

“I’m here to check your stitches and change your bandages,” she says as she steps closer. “Have you experienced anything unusual? Fever or intense pain?”

“No, I’m fine,” he says. The wound aches a little, but he’s still on pain meds, so it's negligible. The doctor begins to reach for his gown to untie the knot in the back, but pauses. 

“Do you want some privacy while we do this?” She proposes, and her eyes wander over to Ghost, who is still sitting in his chair, watching her with sharp eyes. She doesn’t seem uncomfortable by Ghost’s frankly unfriendly-seeming demeanor, more concerned about Soap’s wishes. 

“No. He stays,” Soap says firmly. “Go on.”

She peels the bandage off gently, her hands cool on Soap’s skin. Soap looks down to examine the wound himself. It’s the first time he’s seen it. It’s not a large wound, but damn, it had hurt. It’s still red, but not in a sickly sort of way, and there’s some bruising around it. He wishes he had a trophy to commemorate this. Now that would be awesome. 

“Do you have the bullet?” Soap blurts out. “Can I keep it?”

“Of course. Sometimes we keep them for soldiers. You guys tend to think it’s cool,” she says, amused. 

“Hell yeah, I do,” Soap shoots back, smiling. Maybe he’d put it on the fireplace in his house back in Scotland. 

“How long am I going to be in here?” Soap asks Dr. Sampson. He’s tired right now, but he knows in a few days he’ll probably be going stir-crazy. 

“Not very long, if you continue to recover like this,” she says as she cleans the wound. Soap only winces a little at the sting. “Maybe a week. You won’t be cleared for duty for at least a few months, but you’ll be free to stay in your room.”

Dr. Sampson rebandages his wound, and Soap covers his shoulder back up with the blue hospital gown. He goes to retie the string and a jolt of pain travels through his shoulder and down his arm, making him falter. Ugh, he’s not going to be able to do this himself without the risk of opening his wound.

“Ghost, help me tie this damn thing,” Soap says to him. He turns around so Ghost can tie the strings for him. Ghost is quick with it. 

“Thanks,” Soap says. It’s not his fault, but it’s still a little embarrassing to not be able to tie a knot behind your own back. 

“A nurse will be back to check on you later,” the doctor says to him. She leaves the infirmary and Soap sighs, pulling the blanket up to his chest and letting his eyes fall shut. He drifts off for what could’ve been a few minutes to a few hours, but is awoken to the sound of what sounds like a fucking stampede. The team has come to visit him. 

“Hermano!” Alejandro says loudly, pleased to see him. “Good to see you’re well.”

“I don’t know if I’d call that well,” Gaz pipes up. Alejandro shoots him a look. They don’t greet Ghost, but Ghost also makes no attempt to even interact with them, seemingly content to stay by Soap’s side. He’s still a pretty antisocial lad. 

“How bad is it?” Rudy inquires as he walks up next to Alejandro. 

“I’m probably going to be on bedrest for a while,” Soap sighs. “I think I’m only going to be in here for another day or two, though.”

König continues their line of questioning. “How much does it hurt?”

“Just a little,” Soap responds. “They’ve got me on the good shit.”

“So what was it like?” Gaz asks. “I’ve never been shot before, actually.”

“I can make that happen,” Alejandro says jokingly.

“Shut up,” Gaz replies with the same tone. 

“Hurts like a bitch at first,” Soap says. “Can barely feel a thing now. I wonder why they didn’t stitch it up.”

“Sometimes you’re not supposed to stitch up bullet wounds,” König says. “Bacteria.”

“How do you know?” Rudy asks.

“Read it in a book,” König replies, proud.

Soap fights back a yawn, and he obviously wasn’t being very sly with it, because Alejandro notices and says, “We can leave.”

“No, no, I’m fine,” Soap says, wiping a yawn-induced tear from his eye. “Just a wee bit tired.”

“You look like you’re about to fall asleep,” Gaz says flatly. 

“Alright, let the man rest,” Rudy cajoles the other three men. “Lord knows he deserves it.” 

Soap smiles at that one. Yeah, he totally deserves it. The 141 had taken down one of Mexico’s biggest cartel leaders together, and when he wasn’t confined to a hospital bed, he was going to celebrate. The group says their farewells and leaves the infirmary. With them gone, Soap is all of a sudden very, very tired. He gets comfortable again, pulling the scratchy hospital blanket up over his chest, lulled by Ghost’s unwavering presence and silence. 

“These meds make me so damn tired,” Soap mutters, and his lids are already falling shut without his permission. He hopes Ghost stays. 

——

Soap sleepily opens his eyes to see Ghost gone from his bedside. He did not, in fact, stay. The chair is still pulled up, but Ghost is nowhere to be found. He’s disappointed, but not really surprised that Ghost has gotten tired of hanging out with someone that spends the entire day and night snoozing. Sleeping in the infirmary sucks even when you have a bed, so he can’t imagine that Ghost had been comfortable in the chair, either. 

He woke up just in the nick of time, though, because soon the door to the infirmary opens and Price peeks his head through. His mustache twitches in a smile when he sees that Soap is conscious. 

“How ya feeling, son?” Price asks as he walks over to Soap’s hospital bed. 

“Could be better, could be worse,” Soap says honestly. 

“Ah, your shadow left,” Price comments as pulls up Ghost’s chair and sits in it. 

“I think he got tired of sleeping in the chair,” Soap chuckles in response. 

“He’ll be back,” Price knowingly says, adjusting his hat. 

“How do you ken?” Soap asks. 

“Ghost cares about you,” Price says soberly. “He was scared, y'know. Never seen the man worried about anyone before.”

“Oh,” is what Soap says to that. Of course Ghost cares. He wouldn’t have stayed with Soap if he didn’t, but Soap is still somehow surprised to hear it said out loud. 

“So…” Soap starts. 

“So?” 

“What can be done for Simon?” Soap asks. Soap doesn’t miss the slight quirk in Price’s brow at the use of Ghost’s real name. 

“Due to his… services, and extensive proof of torture and brainwashing, he’s not in any legal trouble anymore,” Price says. “He can go home.”

“He doesn’t have a home,” Soap replies. Or money, or anything. Ghost was still a ghost. But maybe Soap could help. 

“I suppose not,” Price admits. 

“Maybe I could go on leave with him,” Soap thinks out loud. That wasn’t a half bad idea. Soap could heal from his physical wounds, Ghost from his mental wounds, and Ghost could get back on his feet easily enough with some help. 

“Do you want to go on leave?” Price asks. “I can arrange it.”

“I think so,” Soap says. “I… Ghost has nowhere to go. We can’t just kick him out. He could stay with me.”

“I want to put in a leave request. At least three months,” Soap says. Three months would be enough time for his wound to heal correctly, and more importantly, enough time to help Ghost find his new place in the world. 

“I’ll put the request in for you, then,” Price says. 

“Rest up, son,” Price says warmly as he leaves. 

Ghost walks in the door, holding two trays. Soap can’t help but brighten up when he sees Ghost return with food. So he hadn’t left him. Ghost walks over and sets the tray down on the bedside table, and then starts pouring Soap a glass of water, and Soap just about melts. Ghost was too kind to him, really.

“You brought me food,” he thankfully says, the smell of it hitting him and making him realize that he’s hungry. Starving, actually. He grabs the tray and gets started on lunch. Burritos. Nice. Ghost hands him the glass and Soap drinks it down quickly, too, just now realizing that he was thirsty as all hell, too. Ghost lifts up the mask over his nose and eats his own meal quietly. Soap doesn’t mind the silence, not one bit. He should probably take the chance while he was still awake and they were both in the room to tell Ghost what he was planning, though.

“I’m going on leave,” Soap says abruptly. Ghost looks up to him. 

For how long? He asks, putting his food down for a moment to sign. 

“Three months.”

Why so long?

“Simon… What do you say about staying with me? On leave?”

Ghost pauses, and Soap suddenly feels as if he’s crossed a line. Maybe they weren’t on the same page here.

“You dinnae have to,” Soap rushes out, discouraged by his lack of reaction. “I can help you find a place instead. Or you can be by yourself.”

Okay, Ghost replies. 

“You want to?”

I want to stay with you, Ghost says. Soap breathes out a breath he wasn’t aware he had been holding. He wants to be around Ghost, and he doesn’t want to see him leave just yet. There’s a certain giddy feeling in his heart, because Ghost wants to be around him, too, and he wants to stay.

“Okay,” Soap says, and he feels a huge smile make its way onto his face. “Deal.” 

[ourlastbastion]

One thing I'm still getting a laugh out of is just the utter stupid stubbornness of people and how they will double down instead of admitting they might be in the wrong. Like an argument I got into a few days ago.

Short version: On a post discussing how uncool it was of antis harassing others over "incest ship" where the incest was because they (the anti) headcanons two characters as found family, and someone mentioned how that applies to batfam, got corrected bc batfam isn't a headcanon-only family so the harassment they got wasn't the type this post was talking about. This triggered some rando to throw a tantrum because "Batfam isn't a real family, but it also is a family, but it's not-- and you're a ship policing anti for arguing with me!!"

Long version:

Someone made a post about how it's fine and dandy to headcanon x and y as seeing each other as family, but it' not okay to harass others who ship xy with "You can't ship that they're brothers/sisters" when it's only your personal headcanon that they see each other as that. Basically don't force your headcanons on others.

Someone added that "This is absolutely about batfam/batcest shipping and it's antis" and me (plus a few others) piped up and countered that nah fam. OP was talking about anti's harassing ships because they headcanon them as being family. The Batfam is pretty much a canon family no matter how you look at it. And while yeah, antis suck, this was about the specific harassment given towards ships involving characters headcanoned as fam, that's a different subject from what's going on in the batfam (Not to diminish whatever that fandom has going on. It's just apples and oranges, both are fruit, but they're different. Wasn't saying it's good or bad to ship batcest, just pointing out that the batfam didn't necessarily fall under the type of harassment this one was about)

Some absolute rando popped in screaming their head off about how I in particular am wrong and that the batfam aren't family because "No normal family treats each other so badly" kind of stuff. Like, okay? No normal family dresses up in spandex and fur suits beating up criminals and having a homoerotic rivalry with a psychotic clown every night, either. Normal families don't have mob vibes. Then they went off to say that it's WFA's fault that everyone sees them as family now. Which I'd argue is wrong, the batfam was acknowledged as family well before WFA but whatever.

They just kept missing the point of what was going on, frothing at the mouth over how the batfam's not a family, and then about how they're found family because if Bruce adopting random kids isn't found family, what is? (which sure, if you wanna look at it that way, they're found fam. Still not the same as a headcanon-only family.) and blah, blah, blah, apparently I'm a ship policing anti when I said not one word about shipping apart from that I genuinely couldn't give a fuck if someone ships batcest , but that only "proves" I'm a anti, like what the fuck kind of logic is that? So if you say you're not an apple, you must actually be an apple. Yet despite everything, the rando who jumped in screaming couldn't comprehend that the post was about forcing your headcanons on others and harassing others for going against that headcanon. No to them it was about proving the batfam...

I actually don't know what they were trying to prove. That they weren't a family? That they were a found family? That I'm an anti because I pointed out the batfam is canon, not headcanon? At some point I think they were trying to argue that an adopted family isn't a real family, because that's the vibes they be giving.

Honestly, whatever point they were trying to make was lost in all their temper tantrums.

I got tired of it, because there's really only so much ridiculousness I can handle seeing. But still, just amazes me how much people will double down on something and still fail.

[ghovlpire]

OO1 : THE GHOULS / MISS GRIMWOOD'S FINISHING SCHOOL FOR GHOULS

basically just a bunch of little headcanons and some insight mainly on sibella's time at the ghoul school , her relationship with her father and the monsters and , consequently , how it affects her dynamic with the other ghouls .

because sibella is dracula's daughter , it also makes her one of the oldest monsters in the group . it's very likely that her father is only second to the mummy and even then , in terms of survivability in the human world , one could argue that dracula has it a lot easier than the mummy . being a count also means dracula , and therefore sibella , have the resources to make their supernatural lifestyle a lot more comfortable than , for example , the wolfman's . therefore , sibella feels she has a natural responsibility to look out for the rest of the ghouls , just as her father does the other monsters .

on that same note , she was always second in charge at grimwood , helping around with whatever miss grimwood needed done and making sure guests like colonel calloway felt " comfortable " ( or at least as comfortable as one can feel in the ghoul school ) . during shaggy and scooby's time at grimwood , sibella would also often be the one making sure they were doing well . those experiences only cemented her position as the mom of the group .

of all the other ghouls , tanis is the one she is most protective of . not just because of how close ( 👀 ) their parents are , but because she's one of the youngest , like winnie . the difference , however , is that sibella knows winnie can kick ass if needed , whereas she does view tanis as more vulnerable .

on a different note , she's very close with phyllis . they balance each other out quite well , as sibella has a calm and reserved demeanor while phyllis is loud and enthusiastic . phyllis is also the person who truly got her into music , which led sibella to learning how to play the pipe organ and the harp .

has frequent nightmares about revolta , but doens't talk about them with the ghouls because she doesn't want them to see how it affects her . she very much feels the need to be a sort of pillar to the rest of the group , someone the girls can rely on , and she can't do that if she's freaking out over the thought of accidentally draining someone .

a note on sibella and dracula's dynamic : sibella gets along extremely well with her father , and misses him a lot . like seriously , she misses him bad . it's important to note , however , that their relationship wasn't always easy . because sibella is a dhampir , she's not bothered by the sun . however , most of her routine at home had to be crafted around her father's schedule , as dracula can only be outside at sundown and before sunrise . that actually put quite a wedge in their time together , seeing as a twenty - four hour day would often turn to twelve hours , sometimes even less . because he's a vampire , he also doesn't comprehend sibella's active choice to not drink human blood if she can avoid it . he's a lot more detached from humanity than she is , but will make an effort to respect her choices ; especially if he feels it's something her mother would have encouraged .

a note on witchcraft and religion so please don't ready if you don't feel comfortable !: idk about y'all but i always had a feeling that miss grimwood was a witch ( she literally has a pet dragon and a floating hand servant ) , and therefore the ghouls were also introduced to at least basic witchcraft during their time at the ghoul school . sibella is a witch in the more common sense of the word , like anyone could be . but she's not a sorcerer or a magician or anything of the like . she's not gonna transform you into a rat , but she will cast different kinds of spells and draw sigils on stuff , little witchy things like that ♡ she doesn't treat it as part of a religious practice though , as dracula renounced god when he was human and etc. , so that's a topic sibella does her best to stay away from especially in front of her father .

[dykepuffs]

Feeling really just... Bad, in indefinable ways about Brianna Ghey's killers' trial.

(Readmore for long rambling, CN for queerphobic violence, depression, obviously murder)

Obviously, first of all because a young girl was killed in a really horrible way, that would never have happened if even one or two variables of how the day occurred had been different.

But also like - Because Linear Park is the same kind of park as the park I walk through all the time here, and where I played as a kid and where I spent much time as a teenager where I grew up, a disused railway line in a post-industrial northern town that was turned into "green space" largely because land is cheap and decontamination good enough to live on is expensive.

And because I remember being a teenager and being beaten shitless a dozen times by the local homophobic teenagers - Which was always framed by adults as "Just gangs of kids fighting amongst themselves" even though every time it happened me and my friends were incredibly clear about it - That we didn't have any animosity for anyone, we didn't "go out looking for a fight" we just had nowhere to go so we walked around the streets together and if other teenagers saw us, they would try to hurt us or kill us, with bare fists and kicks and often knives and bats and scaff pipes as well as inventive stuff like bleach bombs (fill a water balloon up with a mix of water and toilet bleach, it will both ruin clothes and permanently damage eyes).

Thinking about the number of times we ran, often even ran with our clothes already ripped or already bleeding, and would run past a hundred houses - Houses with the lights on, with the TV flickering through the curtains - and wouldn't even think to knock on any of those doors, because why would a stranger ever care? Because we didn't think our queer lives were worth enough. And even as an adult, thinking of the responses of adults at the time, when we tried to tell them that someone was trying to hurt us in permanent, serious, potentially fatal ways, the response would always be "Oh haha I bet you give as good as you get, don't be a coward!" Not "Jesus christ why is someone trying to stab you just for wearing the wrong kind of clothes?" - Or often even, to side with the aggressors and throw us out or tell them where we were, because "It's a game right!" Or because they assumed that the gorjer kids (and indeed, the straight kids) were "the good guys" for all kinds of homophobic and antiziganist reasons. The puff must have deserved it and the gypsy must have started it, right? Right?!

I feel my stomach twist up in a knot because I knew a girl like Girl X who was obsessed with serial killers and talking about hurting people and killing people, who killed her goldfish and two elderly pet rats, and every time I tried to tell an adult about it I was told to "just ignore her, don't give her attention" - and she just slowly got worse and worse, cut off her boyfriend's haor while he was so stoned he couldn't move and cut up the forearm of one of my friends whilst she was asleep (she needed stitches, and told the Dr stitching her up that she'd just self-harmed, because the first adult she told the truth to said "oh what an imagination you have!" And then screamed at her for lying... The girl who cut her later gloated about being "uncatchable"), and as far as I can tell it was just sheer luck that this was the worst she ever did, nobody ever took any of us kids seriously when we said she was doing bad stuff. She's a big academic now, anyway.

And I'm scared because nothing seems to change. I see the kids from the local secondary school who look queer and they're often alone, they often sit in the railway cutting to drink shoplifted quarter-bottles of vodka and alcopops, they often get stones thrown at them by straight kids and they always seem totally unable to comprehend that an adult would defend them, or even see that it isn't just "kids being kids" -

And part of me is scared for myself- Seeing how vitriolic the worst breeders are, I'm a very visible queer, almost always alone, always walking around late at night, usually in fact walking down the old railway cutting after the pubs close - People often remember having seen me before, and when a bigot remembers seeing you a few times it can fast turn into "I hate this fucker, they're everywhere, I wish I could get rid of them". I've been beaten badly enough to need medical treatment in the last two years, and it's been a long while since I've gone a whole week without some random gang of teenagers or drunks or even sober adults accosting me to hurl abuse or stones or spit. Things really did get better, between about 2007 and 2015, on the "active abuse on the street"-level (even if on a systemic level, things were pretty awful) but... Things are going to a very rough place.

Just... Fuck, everything is shit. If I get kicked to death at 1am by some Big Man bunch of teenagers, on my way home from looking after my housebound buddy; I'm sorry, I wouldn't do anything differently, I love my partner and my comrades, we all have to be family now.

[ai-is-writing]

I really tried my best but it’s more suggestive that anything else. If someone wants to add on to this feel free.

You’re not really sure who you expected to knock at your door after you called the Plumber-company (your mind funnily enough, reminding you of the Italian plumber, with his red hat, from your favorite childhood game) but you definitely didn’t account for the behemoth standing in your doorway. Is he going to fit in your bathroom, your bed yes but your bathroom? You have to shake the thoughts from you head, the man’s here to work, to help you with your problem.

He must’ve seen the hesitant look on your face, cocking an eyebrow up urging you to let him in. "141 Plumbing, you called. The name's Simon."

"Ah yes, come inside. The bathroom's just down the hallway." If you could even call it a hallway, the shoebox of an apartment all you could afford with rent prices skyrocketing in Manchester. But that’s a bullet you had to bite for the luxury of living alone.

You close the door before leading him to the bath. "I don’t know why but the water takes ages to drain from the sink. At this point I’ve tried every trick in the books but nothing really helped. Ain't got a man to help me clean my pipes, thought I’d leave it to someone with hands more skilled than mine." Simon let’s out a low chuckle and you can’t help yourself to glance over your shoulder throwing him a smile.

Stopping in front of your bathroom you step to the side as to let him walk in.

"Sorry, it‘s going to be a tight fit, didn’t expect someone so big." He dismisses your apology with a cocky smile, stepping into the room. "Don’t you worry, doll. I can work with tight, always make sure it fits." I bet you do.

Your face feels hot.

You can’t comprehend if that really was meant to sound so lewd or if it’s just the part of you brain that has been disappointed by one-night-stands more than often, that’s listening. God how long has it been.

You really take him in now that he’s in your bathroom, crouching down inspecting your sink. Blond hair. Work pants. Tight shirt. Shoulders so wide he could be Hercules himself. Speaking of, he’s carrying muscles that make you think about what he’s doing in his free time. Probably working out. He could work me out. God you really need to get dicked-down. Preferably by the man taking up half of your bathroom by simply exist-

„Sweetheart, I need to clean out your pipe."

"I-" you swallow. Have you been thinking out loud? "sorry, what?"

His stare is so intense that it might just burn holes through you. "There is a blockage I need to remove, if not it will lead to the pipe busting. Flooding your cute apartment."

oh.

You nod at him and he starts taking apart the pipe connecting your sink to the wall. Thick fingers gripping pliers, working swiftly to loosen the coupling nut.

You feel ashamed. Dirty. Having such thoughts about a man simply doing his job and being more than professional, makes you feel bad.

Simon is a quick and efficient worker. Disassembling, cleaning out and reassembling the pipes in mere minutes. You didn’t even get to offer him a lemonade.

He’s now standing to his full height, toolbox slung under his arm: "The bill will be issued to this address. You don’t got to worry s'not going to be expensive, was hardly here." Simon's looking you up and down, under his scrutiny you can’t help but clench your thighs together, body heating up.

"Thank you."

"No need to thank me darling, it’s my job." Very professional.

You lead him back to your front door, opening it in one smooth motion. Thanking him once more and wishing him a good day, you try to close your door but Simon turns around again. He hands you a piece of paper with a wink.

"Maybe next time i can check if your pipes are still in good condition, seems like they haven’t been used in quite a while?“

Plumber!ghost coming to clean out your pipes

Plumber!ghost coming to clean out your pipes

(sorry I had to, someone sedate me now)

genuinely im not joking this is me being absolutely sincere, i need u to write this :|

[luveline]

Hiiii, love! For your dialogue prompts, how about "Tell me you love me," with any of the boys you think it suits (personally, I see Remus?) But I defer to you. And if you're not feeling it, no pressure 😘😘

sorry this is bad love you <3 ty for requesting my <3

There's a hole in the wall. 

You're flabbergasted and you let it show. "Remus," you say, looking at your boyfriend with more shock than you've ever felt, "what the fuck happened?" 

"Well, uhm. Well. Sweetheart, the thing is, I tried to hang your painting."

"My painting." 

"Yes, baby. Your gorgeous self-portrait. Have I told you how pretty you look today?" 

You drop your bag on the floor and pull your headphones out of your ears. They dangle an inch from the floor, phone in limp fingers. 

"There's a hole in the wall."

"Yes. Yeah. It's a marginally small hole, in all fairness." 

You gawp at him. "That is not the truth," you say tentatively. 

Remus, in his socks and his cuffed jeans and his stupid soft t-shirt covered in plaster dust, has the gall to look mildly offended at this. 

"I need to sit down." 

"You do that, angel." 

You sit on the sofa. The hole seems to get bigger the longer you stare at it. "Remus, I can't fix that." 

"I don't expect you to," he says softly, still standing in the middle of the rug. 

"You can't fix it." 

"I mean, I think I could. Probably. Maybe. Uh," his confidence drops the longer you look at him. 

You're not staring at him meanly. You're not angry, you're just shocked. How has he done this? He looks so sorry that it makes your chest flare with fondness for him, and you look at the painting you did of yourself, a sloppy self portrait, neatly framed up against the wall and suddenly can't handle his uncertain face anymore. 

"It's okay, Remus," you say. 

His shoulders drop in relief. You smile in what you hope is a calming way. 

"Go get changed and come cuddle me," you say bossily, lying down so you don't have to look at his face, worried you might let him hug you all covered in plaster if he looks soft enough. 

He leaves. You lift your head up to glare at the awful hole in the wall and then flop back down. Soon, Remus comes back in one of your t-shirts and a pair of pajama trousers and you don't have it in you to deny him, opening your arms to let him flop into them. 

He crawls into your arms and tucks his face shyly into your chest. You roll your eyes and squish his face against you with your hand cupped over his ear, petting his hair. 

"Gonna tell me how the hole got there?" 

He lifts his head and grins like a kid who knows they've done something bad and comprehends how thin the ice is beneath him. 

"It was a freak accident, honey." 

Honey. You want to fight him. You're not mad, but you're tired, and there's a huge fucking hole in the wall if you hadn't mentioned it, and he's laying on all your favourite pet names because he knows they work. 

"How freak?" 

"I put a nail in the wall, and then I tried to hammer it in but it wouldn't actually go in? So I thought maybe I was on a pipe. So I moved it, but maybe I weakened the wall? And I know," he sounds stressed, high pitched, nothing like himself, "that sounds crazy, but it's the truth, and then I sort of missed the nail with the hammer and it went through the wall and got stuck and then I pulled it out. Yeah." 

You try not to laugh. You fail. He drops a kiss into your chest and you know he knows he's forgiven, not that you could really be mad. 

"I'm sorry," he says. 

"Maybe James can fix it." 

"Maybe," Remus says, not believing it. You don't believe it either. 

"Reckon we could cover it with a bedsheet?" you ask. 

He nestles his face back into your chest and sighs. "We could." 

"Cos we really need that new mattress." 

"You can use me as your mattress, babe." 

"Remus." 

"Are you mad at me?" he asks. 

You rub your hand up his back, and can feel the line of his spine through the material of his shirt. You apply a nice, rough amount of pressure like you know he likes. 

"Nah," you admit finally. 

"No?" 

"It was only an accident. You were trying to be nice." 

He wraps his arms around your waist, forearms going underneath you. It doesn't feel very different to our mattress, you think to yourself dryly, though the cuddling is nice. Is perfect. 

"Tell me you love me?" he asks. 

"I love you. Of course I do," you say, using your fingertips to push the waves out of his eyes. You press a kiss to the newly bared skin. His eyelashes twitch against your collar. 

"Sorry about the wall," he murmurs. 

"Tell me you love me. Right now, tosser," you demand.

"I love you!" he bursts out, startled at your angry tone. 

You drop the act and tighten your arms around him, squeezing him and swaying him side to side. "I love you, you idiot," you practically sing-song. "And I'll love you so much more when you make me tea." 

[lofty-immeasurable-sky]

Zukka Little Mermaid au!!

Most of my comic ideas start with the intention of making something sweet, and then going, ‘well… wouldn’t it be funnier if…”

Thank you for 700 followers!!!! Holy cow!! WOW!!! Wow. I’m embarrassed to say this but I was absolutely bamboozled when I read that number because I quite forgot to check how many followers I had for like 3 months, and last time I checked I had 93. I don’t think I’ve done an actual double take before until now. I don’t think I even know 700 people. My village has less people than that. My entire high school, staff and all, is a couple hundred less than that. It’s hard to imagine that 700 separate people decided to tap that little button on their phone because they thought my artwork is cool. Wow!! I have no idea what to do with myself? Perhaps I should go for a stroll and collect 700 leaves or bugs or something to try to comprehend how many that is.

[ID: Digital drawings of Zuko and Sokka drawn on top of the Little Mermaid screencaps. In the first panel, Sokka, who has a long blue mermaid tail, touches an unconscious Zuko. Zuko is wearing a tattered short white robe and crimson pants. Sokka says, “He’s… beautiful.” Sokka clears his throat, then sings, “What would I give to live where you areee, what would I pay to stay here beside you, what wou--” It is evident that his singing is horrible. Zuko, distressed but still unconscious, grabs Sokka’s hand. Sokka says, “Oh Shrimp! I made it worse!” In the next scene, Zuko holds his forehead and frowns at the dinner table. “Ugh, Uncle. There’s this voice. I feel like I’ve met him before… but I don’t know where! I just can’t get it out of my head… even in my dreams…” Iroh smiles, lights his pipe, and says, “Well, Prince Zuko, legend says that the melody of our true love’s voice never lea--” Zuko interrupts, “NO, UNCLE. IT SOUNDS SO BAD.” I want to find out who it is so I can tell him to SHUT UP.” Iroh, nervous, says, “umm, let’s see…” Then, Sokka and Zuko are in a canoe at nighttime. Katara, also a mermaid, whispers, “PSST. His name is Sokka.” Sokka, now with legs, smiles as Zuko says, “Oh! Is your name… Sock?” Sokka makes a ‘keep going’ gesture. Zuko says, “Oh, um, I’m close? Oh, ok, uh… Socks? Shoes? Um… Sneakers? Boots? Uh… er… Flip Flop? Galoshes?” Sokka frowns and Katara throws up her hands in defeat. In the next scene, Sokka is a mermaid again. He says, “H-HEY! I’ve actually been a MERMAID this whole time! SURPRISE! Heh…” Zuko looks on in horror. Sokka says, “Yeesh, I’ve really messed things up, haven’t I? I’M SORRY MY VOICE GOT STUCK IN YOUR HEAD! I didn’t mean to start singing! I was just thinking, y’know, ‘oh, hot shipwrecked sailor guy, this is so aesthetic!’ Ugh, I know it was annoying--” Zuko looks at him, hearts for pupils. Sokka says, “I wa--mf!” Zuko kisses him. Then, he holds Sokka’s face and says, “I don’t think you’re annoying. But could you maybe just shut up? For the next 5 minutes?” Sokka, eyes half lidded, says, “Uh, yeah. Um. I can do that.” They kiss again, and in the corner are the words, “THE END.” End ID.]

[nobodyinfart]

sometimes the barista is sweeter than the coffee~

hehe, i hope you all will enjoy!! sorry if the characters' scenarios are a little drastic, i have a really soft spot for aether (he's my favourite <3). let me know if there is any feedback since I am still testing out my writing style ( ＾∀＾)

also, to explain, genshin high au is basically all the genshin characters in a high school~ i'm pretty sure that i am not the one who came up with this so do let me know if there is any similar au!!

masterlist

description: everyone goes to coffee shops for coffee. that doesn't seem to apply to them though.

category: imagine

type: fluff

characters mentioned: aether, bennett, zhongli x gn! reader

aether <3

our little angel was freaking exhausted

from having to run errands for the student council and keeping up with his AP classes, aether didn't manage to eat lunch, let alone take a breather. so you can imagine how tired he would be, yearning for a bit of peace, just enough to stop worrying about his assignment deadlines and other people's problems for just a while

his distress escalated when the rain did not stop but grew from a trickle to a bloody rain pour. with no choice but to run, only managing to make it to an isolated shophouse

now, his bad day just got a hundred times worse, and he now is genuinely upset, wanting to burst into tears

shaking off whatever water he had in his now drenched blond hair, he then noticed what seemed to be a tranquil coffee shop next to him, with seemingly nobody inside

the bells chimed as aether being curious, made his way inside

he immediately felt a warm comfort as he got away from the chilling rain

he admired his surroundings, the fairy lights partnered with extensive bookshelves and the light scent of coffee makes a comfortable, soothing ambience

though he was dripping all over the floor (not in that way y'all nasties ('･_･`))

"goodness! are you okay? in the cold, are you nuts!" you jumped over the counter and took his cold hands into yours, startled at the sopping wet stranger to even realise the invasion of privacy

though it seemed that aether didn't mind, as he flushed but gripped your warm hands, appreciating the warmth the slightly calloused hands gave him

a fussing over and a small hand towel given later, aether sat in one of the couches, wondering where you went in such a hurry

you immediately appear, holding a cup of piping hot chocolate and settling it down in front of aether

aether reached for his wallet only to be refused, "no! no need for that, take it as a treat!" you chuckled and insisted

he could only accept heartedly as you scampered off to deal with the customers that just came in, your figure quickly disappearing from sight

only then did he notice the overload of whipped cream with many marshmallows as well as a small note on a discarded receipt

'hope you enjoy it!! extra whipped cream and marshmallows for an adorable customer hehe <3.'

his heart melted, unable to comprehend the cheesy yet sweet compliment

his eyes subconsciously drifted to you behind the counter and seeing you handling the upcoming drinks like a pro, queueing shots as well as making the ice-blended drinks

your eyes met his, and your eyes turned into crescents as you gave him a wide grin

awe, you look so cute smiling (*'∇｀*), aether definitely admired your gleeful face before making a mental note to clear his schedule to visit this sweet barista often~

bennett <3

now, when fischl said that she had found a new hangout spot, benny expected a park or playground since they (fischl, razor, bennett) could get pretty loud, and people didn't really like that

definitely not a coffee shop

though he had to admit that it did look like a pretty welcoming place, with a handwritten chalk drink menu

'( *｀ω') espresso impresso!!' being written at the corner of the signboard

hehe, he couldn't help but release a chuckle at the funny word pun before noticing fischl in a very intense conversation with the barista

"no, girl- you wouldn't believe what happens in the next chapter! the guy actually says he's just there to eat the rich second generation meal, i couldn't stop laughing!" your eyes crinkled as you recount the novel, fischl hushing you as to not hear spoilers

"one does not wish to hear such sin spilling from another's lips! this one shall read it for herself!" fischl hmphs in annoyance, yet the slight curve of her lips show otherwise

fischl then makes introductions for the gang

"razor- yes indeed the one who showed up to academic classes in that wolfish attire one calls a onesie."

bennett, on the other hand, didn't even need introductions

"wait, i know you! you were the guy that managed to light your pants on fire, right?" you could only snort as you remember the viral video online

bennett flushed as he recounted how he had to dive into the school pool to extinguish the flames, earning him several weeks of detention for public misconduct

though it was pretty funny, you have to admit that the video didn't do him any justice

he definitely was a cutie, with the freckles across tanned cheeks and bright green eyes

though you keep those thoughts to yourself, starting to take their orders

fischl's usual (an iced chai latte with more chai, less milk), razor wanted simply steamed milk with a little sprinkle of cinnamon

benny, however, was stuck, so you offered your lovely expertise

"hmmm, i got an idea! you like iced drinks, right?" benny was confused but nodded with a sheepish smile

a couple minutes later, you came out carrying three drinks on a tray

the trio marvelled at the drink settled in front of bennett, mesmerised

it looked like iced chocolate, except the chocolate was dropped at the bottom, a majority of the glass (being milk) having the middle layer, followed by the unmistakable brown coffee shots on the top

this made a pretty three-layered drink, very appealing to the eyes and phone camera (courtesy of fischl)

"wow! this looks amazing-!"

"hehe, thanks~ i came up with it myself. should I name it after my inspiration?"

giving benny a wink, you leave them to their idle chit chat to continue working

every now and then, you shoot a glance to the group only to see bennett's quickly darting eyes as if he has been caught staring at you

if only you could mind read, then you would catch a glimpse of his awe on how suave you were, and boy was he mesmerised

maybe the next time the group comes, he will ask for your name instead of just gawking

zhongli <3

now, we all know that zhongs is a man of not many words, preferring a comfortable silence

but, it is a problem that he was so eye-catching

sleek brown hair in a low ponytail and upturned cat eyes that would leave anyone starstruck

his lean muscles slightly straining his uniform, being the living reincarnation of tall and handsome beauty

of course, people would stare

he would also often get approached by people, especially admirers who desperately want to 'get to know him'

being a gentleman, he couldn't refuse harshly, leading to them accompanying him throughout whatever he was doing

in cafes, in the school library, even in the student council room

though it wasn't obvious, he was starting to get annoyed

all he wanted was a quiet place to chill in peace, a secret haven to do his schoolwork or simply read, preferably a place where he could have a nice hot cup of tea

he couldn't even get that in the school, let alone in public cafes that held so many people

that's why he was surprised when he saw your store

looking in through the glass window, there was barely anybody inside

despite the coffeehouse having such a quaint, welcoming interior, with bookshelves filled with books and small succulents hanging by windows

intrigued, he went in to explore, then seeing you

he would have to describe you as a naturally warm person, seeing as how your eyes lit up at the sight of a customer

"oh, hello! what would you like today?"

"i'm not quite sure, is there any tea recommendations?"

as he was browsing the many options, there was no doubt in my mind that you were staring

zhongli carried himself with a certain air of elegance, walking with grace as akin to a god (heh)

as he ordered, he noticed that you were not as invasive as the other people he had met

your friendly attitude and sweet smile was quite refreshing to see if he had to be honest, not to mention that the way you treated him was without expecting anything in return

as his tea arrives, he quickly notices two instead of the usual one cookie on the side

he could only look up to see you shoot him a gummy smile

a soft smile replaces his features, and he immediately nods his head in a silent thank you

the beautiful smile no doubt makes you a little flustered, but you still wave it off with a chuckle and go back to work

zhongli takes a sip of his tea and appreciates its flavour, instantly knowing that he has now found the quiet chilling place he has been looking for

[jordanlahey]

Okay okay- innocent x lost boys get me. Let’s say, a new girl comes to Santa Carla and she’super sweet and sees how grumpy the boys look (maybe the surf nazis fucked with their bikes) and decides to win the stuffies, and awkwardly giving them to the boys and wishing them a better day?? Sry if this is toooo specific or odd

This one was kinda sweet to write

Tonight was the night you decided to venture out to the Boardwalk after days of unpacking at your new house. You were excited yet a little nervous it was never fun doing things by yourself especially in a crowded place like this, teenagers and kids alike run wild from stall to stall ride to ride.

A group of teens maybe in their early 20's? Had caught your eye but for the wrong reasons. You were simply walking passed them near a small group of bikes maybe 4? You weren't sure how a massive group of people could all fit onto 4 motorbikes which only meant the bikes were theirs. They were laughing and joking about as well as possibly tampering with the bikes, you decided to stay and watch from afar you could step in but there were lots of them and only one of you. In a second they all started running in your direction, you turned your head as they scurried past you they had a genuine look of fear on their faces, who ever they pissed off wasn't the best target.

The sound of swearing and shouting brought your attention back to the bikes and 4 boys appeared there, they all were very pissed. You felt bad having just watched it happen and not do anything to stop them. Pursing your lips together you thought long and hard how you could make them feel better then an idea popped into your head. You began rummaging around in your pocket to find any change then headed deeper into the crowd towards the claw machines.

It took up most of your night but you managed to finally win 4 stuffed animals from the claw machines with the exception of not leaving until you had them and apologizing to kids who waited so long for you to finish it also cost you all your pocket money too but it was worth it. At least you hope so. You started wondering back and found the four boys all sitting on their bike or against them and that's when the insecurity hit you or the harshness of reality, they were boys clad in leather and looked like they belong in a rock band they wouldn't appreciate a stuffed animal it isn't their style! They're gonna laugh at you for being so stupid and soft!? You had stopped walking and had all intentions to walk away but they boys had already noticed you.

"Hey sugar, can we help you." the one that looked like a glam rocker spoke and that made you more nervous. Swapping glances between the stuffed animals in your hands and them you could fee your face heat up.

"I...Um." You tried to avoid eye contact and stare at the floor while holding your arms out for them to take what you had got them. They boys exchanged glances they were indeed the slightest bit confused why you of all people would hand them stuffed animals it's not something the would be particularly interested in yet here you are. "I saw those guys mess around with your bikes and I was too anxious to try stop them so to make you feel better I won these for you and the also apologize for not doing anything to stop them so please take them." you piped up still staring into the ground hoping it would swallow you whole and save you from the embarrassment. You felt the stuffed animals being taken from your hands and they all muttered a 'thanks' to you it felt awkward so as soon as your hands were empty you bolted away shouting "have a great night."

The boys once again stared at each other still trying to comprehend what just happened. David stared down and the bear and smirked to himself, it was kind of you to have done that for them in fact no one has done that for them do really they don't know how to react.

"So can we keep her?" Marko broke the silence, he admired your boldness they all did. Despite you being timid you still walked up to them and spoke words to them more than what anyone else would do. Their Repuation as the big bad biker gang didn't phase you one bit yeah they were intimidating but that didn't stop you, yeah they admire you maybe just maybe they want to keep an eye on you get to know you a little more.

[murasakispace]

Adam/Shindo Ainosuke X Male Reader

Author's note : Adam needs a bit of love, don't you think? A little love that doesn't imply to hurt Tadashi. It doesn't prevent that it is certainly crap. English is not my main language and it must be awful.

Warnings : NSFW, spanking, degradation and all the BDSM pack.

You were a newcomer, a rookie here. In S. You had the time to watch the local legends fall from their safe sky on the large screens. The most incredible was the race against Langa. Well... You were still wondering if his name was really Langa. Maybe you misunderstood, hidden in your shadows. First Joe, then Cherry and finally Adam. You had to admit their style was eclectic. Even them had to learn again. They were believing themselves as gods because they were the founders of a clandestin course. It made you shrug a little while you were observing them.

People were people. Here, in S, freedom was at its most powerful. A place were no one could say, order to someone something he doesn't want to do. Everything was ruled by skateboard and the people's talent. You were quite happy of that. Because of an accident years ago in mountains with your motorbike while you were heading to the summit so as to practice snowboard. You had the ambition to reach the Winter Olympic Games in half-pipe. You fell from a cliff and you miraculously landed meters below with broken ribs instead of your backbone.

During years you suffered and your dream of medals in the Olympic Games was gone, vanished into the air. Your well-known recklessness almost hurried you in your grave. In the hospital, you spent the last three years to reeducate with an omnipresent pain in your back, anger against the people who had forgotten you when you would have given them your soul if they asked for it an ended alone. You nearly lost your mind when you woke up from coma and nothing appeared in front of you. You weren't able to see anymore. Time went by and you found yourself offered the chance to remedy to your blindness. But it doomed you to wear particular sunglasses every day of your life. A little cost considering what you've been through.

You suffered. You were still aching but less than these last month. Moreover you felt better each day passing. Only eternal scars remain. And to be here in S got you like you were free as much as before your accident. And you would thank Adam for this. Yet, you meant nothing, watching the same scenes which were playing in front of your eyes.

You were sitting on your motorbike far behind the last people composing the crowds ahead of you. Actually, the last time you came at S was when Adam had been defeated. Since then, you weren't coming as often as you should now. Everything was more peaceful and Adam abandoned this bad habit to smash people in the face with his own skateboard. Of course, the blue-haired show-off would never stop to make his little shows and big entrances. You don't think that one day his "hey bitches and bros and non-binary hoes" would leave your mind so easily.

Yet, even if you admired Adam as an remarkable skater, you wouldn't prevent yourself to hate him for everything he was aside all of it. He was "in love" as he told to anyone who would like to hear it with his partners of race. It was nothing like love. You didn't know how you manage to not go through the crowds to slap him right in the face. He didn't understand. He wouldn't anyway. Love is sweet, a fluttering sentiment which set upside-down your guts and your soul. It wasn't how you remembered this wonderful thing.

Anyways, Adam had been defeated by a rookie that you had the power to crush on a snowboard. Even if he was talented, had he the talent of someone able to go in the Olympic Games? You didn't think so. You had yourself a modified board. And right now before the attended race between two opponents, you were as if you were playing on the half-pipe near the start of the race.

You were jumping even higher than this little rookie and executing figures in air that were turning sick some of the people gathered in your audience. You were hearing the slight gasps of awe coming from several girls watching them. Even Langa applaused you in the distance with an annoying smile. That little group comprehending Shadow, Reki, Langa, Miya and the others was sincerely uselessly noisy. Though, they were sometimes giving you back a smile you had long forgotten it was existing. But you didn't care anymore. You were busy with your "switched back flip with nose grab" and to make people applause even louder around you.

They were kind and cute because even if the trick wasn't so hard, doing it on a skateboard was something else. And it earned you the nickname of Eagle in S. You were impressive to say the least and people were clearly stunned. What you didn't expect was to attract the boss' attention here. Adam. Actually, his little grieves left you as if you were like marble.

Not only was he sticking to you but he also was quite insisting in his behavior. You didn't like him at all. It may have been the second or the third night that you came on the half-pipe of S. No one challenged you that time. You just shrugged your shoulders and were going on the way to leave this place. The pressure, the people gathered here, the races and the clear lack of delicacy from them made you get away from here. A sort of repulsion ordered you to go away. A skatepark would be big enough to allow you to do the same show for any passerby. After all what was the point of tiring yourself by skating if no one could applause for your demonstration of pure talent. And today, several nights after Adam's defeat, you were leaving S for good this time. It has no point for you to stay.

Yet, Adam didn't want the same. He was observing you before Langa. So he caught you up while lights were dancing around him.

"Mmh... What a wonderful little bird I see here. Don't be scared my dove, I'm not going to bite you." Adam said both loudly and sensually, thus it made crowds look in the same moment towards you.

A heavy silence has just fallen onto the crowds. You have heard the wheels of Adam's skateboard behind you. And he came, leaving his hand on your hips, getting you closer and closer to him. You could feel his hands roaming and doing delicate circles on the fabric of your clothes. Such an intimate action while you could almost feel his head rest on your shoulder. He made a little comment about your scent. Does this man have really no shame ?

"Aren't you tired of your own bullshit, Adam? Losing once wasn't enough to bring humility in you?" you snapped back while the man gazed at you.

"Never, my sweet, stubborn little dove" Ainosuke whispered in your ear while his hands were circling around your waists.

His sweet, gentle, poisonous tone was near to give you shivers. You weren't able to discern within yourself if it was a sort of trespassing desire that was boiling in you or a fire of rage and the deep will to smash him with your skateboard. Probably both. Let's agree on the fact that this man was a living invitation to luxury and rough love. You were just a little smaller than him but strong enough to make him comply and kneel in front of you like a slut. You clicked your tongue and forcefully escaped from Adam's treacherous embrace.

"Alright Eagle. I challenge you into a beef" Adam called behind you.

"Carry on" You answered back while the crowds become immediately silent were watching you with great interest.

"A race. You and me. Right now. The loser become the slave of his opponent." Adam added with his usual disturbing smile.

For one of the first times since you were coming in S, it was one of your first beefs. Moreover, with the boss of all that mess. And finally, it involved something hidden behind all of this display. And you liked it. Why not enjoying fully the race and the aftermath. You used the back extremity of your skateboard you hit Adam in the belly and making him move backwards. You were almost ecstatic. You walked calmly until the start line, put lightly your skateboard on the ground and set your foot on the deck while you were waiting for Adam to come. Obviously, he made his way towards you.

"Mmh... I'll enjoy to turn you upside down after this race" Adam sensually whispered.

"Your self-confidence will kill you one day, filthy man" you replied with a dry tone.

"Let's say that now that I've lost my Eve, the only person in S having my attention is you my little dove. Be ready, I'm not going to be easy on you"

These last sentences would the death of you. His magma-like voice was burning your insides. How can someone warm you up so efficiently? That was a mystery. But you liked it. Adam was well-known to be kinky. You hated a little yourself at that time. You were falling for an insane guy who is now targeting you. Obviously, it was not in a romantic way. Yet, Adam remained a reachable fanstasm. And you were apparently one of his. The green fire came rapidly, thus the start of the race.

Adam became fastly the first. You forgot about everything and just tried to have fun. You were skating as if your board was a part of yourself, dodging rocks and Adam's attack. You knew very well that he didn't change that much after his first defeat here. He even did his little thing of holding you close to him with the sort of horns on his skateboard.

" I love the movement of your hips, so agile, so smooth, I can't prevent myself to wonder what it will feel like to love you fully until you will ache for attention under my touch. You are a snowboarder too, right?" Adam asked more or less.

"You could say that. But I'm not like that kid. I prefer half-pipes. Besides, you have really no shame, haven't you? Anyways, goodbye."

You increased your speed and left Adam behind. You were jumping the cliffs where the turns formed the shape of a snake with the lights in the night. While you were flying, you were shining with more and more complicated figures and graceful landings, making you significantly ahead of the blue-haired holy creature named Adam. He managed very quickly to catch you up. A little smile was playing on your lips. That was funny to see him a little bit in difficulty.

You were provoking him. That was unbelievable and remarkably bold of you to do so. You annoying smile was allowing to build desire and longing in Adam's heart. He was the king and yet, a little dove was playing with him shamelessly. Adam was so mesmerized by your own race that he barely realized he was in the factory. The screams of the people gathered in there dragged him from his thoughts. He saw you fly until the finish line and cross it. You win against him. A huge silent welcomed him.

"One of the first things you have not to lose when you run is your own concentration. I don't know what happened to you but it doesn't prevent that you weren't really skating. So for the beef, I cancel the slave thing." You declared when Adam went towards you.

You turned your back to him and headed to your motorbike followed by the blue-haired man. You didn't want to stay any longer. Adam's footsteps were soft behind yours.

"How can you cancel the slave thing, as you called it?" Adam demanded.

Seeing that he didn't have any answer, Adam reached you to catch your shoulder and make you turn to look at him.

"Because I'm the winner" you responded with a threatening tone.

"So having me doesn't interest you?" Adam questioned with a spark of deception.

"I didn't say that" you replied with a playful half-smile crossing your lips.

You were surrounded by darkness and no one cared anymore about you. For the people, you were remedying with your little issues about the beef. Nothing very interesting for them. Your hand climbed Adam's tensed thigh before going backwards to his ass and caressing it shamelessly. You heard the man getting a heavier breath and mumbling sinner sentences in your ear. You didn't even move when he came closer to enjoy the caress.

"Adam... You are such a slut... Look at you, you sound like a virgin discovering sex" You told with an incredible amount of heat on your voice.

You left your fingers coming down on his half-hard dick and rub it lightly. Just enough to give shivers to the man.

"Horny, aren't we?" you carried on while Adam was melting under your touch.

It was only simple caresses yet the man in front of you was letting himself go as if you were escaping and he won't have anymore opportunities to have you so close.

"More" demanded Adam while he has finally what he wanted so hard.

But you stopped here, creating frustration in the man.

"There's a love hotel down Crazy Rock. Come with your Grim Reaper costume." You requested with an overbearing tone.

Adam ordered to Tadashi who wasn't present in S that night to bring him to this place and the black clothes he was wearing against Langa. Once arrived in the building, he headed towards the receptionist who led him until the room. The space was dark and very classical for a love hotel but it was enough to arouse Adam. He felt as if your hands were still on him while he was changing his red costume. The memory of your hands trailing down his back to reach his ass and caressing it shamelessly was still unbelievably strong in his mind. Then he felt the touch join his cock, gently but still enough to make surrender to your touch. He desired you so much right now. Once he wore his Grim Reaper clothes, he laid down the mattress. He let himself go to the warmth he was feeling. He already wanted you so hard. He thought he was still dreaming when he felt the sudden touch of your hand on his neck.

"Ready to cum due to a shameless imagination. What a dirty little pet we have here. Were you planning to touch while you would wait for me? " You whispered in Adam's ear, getting him to have goosebumps.

Your fingers went down along his spine then reached the start of his ass. You were riding him from behind, each of your legs apart Ainosuke's body. You spanked his cheeks violently when you see you wouldn't get your answer, making the man moaning of both pain and pleasure.

"Use your tongue. You still have one, right?" you picked up after this unwanted silence.

"Yes" mumbled the submitted man.

"Louder. I don't hear you."you commanded.

"Yes"

He was speaking at the volume you wanted to listen. Loudly but not enough to disturb people out there.

"Better" you acknowledged with a neutral tone.

You got away from the position you have over Ainosuke. You were looking for the bad you brought with you. In the corner of your eye, you remarked the presence of a mirror. It could be useful but not now. You were secretly impatient to play with the king of S. You glanced at him and couldn't prevent a half-smile on your face. His hips were slightly higher than what would be normal. The blue-haired man was aching for your touch. Unhappily, it seemed sometimes you weren't as mean as some of masters with their human pet when it comes to tough, rough and painful but delicious sex. Well... It didn't matter actually. Your beautiful puppy lying on the mattress would love it anyway. You sincerely enjoyed the fact that this natural dominant male was completely under your control.

"Get up and kneel. Be rid of your clothes and keep your eyes on the wall. If you look at me I leave you here, tied and with a toy in your ass until you faint. Is that clear?" You ordered with a severe voice.

You didn't get any answer immediately.

"Yes". You heard behind you.

"Yes who?" You added.

"Yes Master" Adam ended while he just worked to be in his knees over the blankets.

The man got rid of his suit not so quickly. The fabric was comfortable and smooth, suiting perfectly his body. The memory of your touch was almost disappearing with him leaving aside all the clothes. He ended naked on the bed, his pale skin revealed to the air. He kept his eyes locked on the wall and he didn't have any access to the mirror to watch what you were doing. He only heard some noises somewhere behind him. Adam was shivering litghtly because of anticipation. He didn't want you to be kind with him. The rougher the better. Anyways, love and pain were both the faces of a coin, right? He submits but you serve.

Ainosuke felt your hand climbing along his leg and rest a few seconds on his thigh. You slided a lubed toy in his hole. You went as deeply as you could without bruising you pet and without leaving without any sensations. His insides were slightly stretched enough to emphasize the rubbing which you started from a few feets away.

You had the time to change in a black leathery pants and high boots, all black, with an open shirt lazily flying along your sides. After that, you were just watching Ainosuke's nakedness from behind. He was well-shaped. You couldn't say more. And this beautiful insane man was craving for your attention. You knew the effect the toy had. The more Adam was holding back his moan, the more the toy is going to make him lose his mind. You knew very well that the man had a certain endurance. Yet, it had no effect when the right points within his body were touched and loved.

You were still gentle. You could be more cruel and less careful about your little pet. Adam knew it very well. He was sure he looked like a little virgin taking pleasure for the first time but the thing inside of him suppressed all of his strength. He was grunting and moaning like a whore and he loved it. But it wasn't enough. It wasn't you.

"More..." Breathed the man while his whole body was totally shaking.

"More? Really?" you asked while you were enjoying the frustration on Adam's face and the red hue on his cheeks.

"Inside me... Touch me..."you went to caress Ainosuke's naked ass before spanking it another time.

"You have no permission to cum, dirty pet. I'll punish you otherwise."you warned with a threatening tone in your voice.

The heat was slightly consuming the blue-haired man and pleasure was way too heavy for him, almost choking sometimes. You would be the death of him if it carried on.

"Please..."Adam silently begged while you were heading to an armchair not far away from the display in front of you.

Were you sadistic? Probably. You had one of your legs hanging on the side of your seat and watching Ainosuke fighting the destroying pleasure inside of him. You were so desirable. No one would ever say the contrary. It was only the start for your adorable pet. But it wasn't enough for you.

"Come here." You commanded with a monotonous but commanding tone in your voice.

You saw Adam moving to reach you. He stumbled on the few meters he had to make to come at you. He knelt in front of you but it sounded more like he wasn't able to carry his own weigh. He was looking up at you with eyes tainted of pleasure. He caressed your legs as any good cat would do to please his master and get some food or any touch. Your hand reached his chin and you lift it without any delicacy. A few more and Adam was going to surrender and leaving himself being overwhelmed by pleasure. His red eyes were blurry and full of lust and you locked yours on his. Your hand went in his hair and you brought him closer to you.

"Take it. And do it well, slut" you requested with an overbearing tone.

You felt shaking hands roaming over your leather pants and undo the belts resting on your hips. His fingers freed your half-hard dick but he was too slow.

"Faster" you ordered.

Adam put his finger on the skin of your shaft, then his lips. You hardly held back a grunt of pleasure while you were feeling his hot mouth around your cock. That was divine but not enough. You settled your fingers in Ainosuke's hair and pulled it closer.

"Come on, slut"

The blue-haired man wasn't slow but it wasn't fast enough and it frustrated you. You ordered him for more speed and he did it. Adam was all focus on your pleasure, worshipping you with his tongue and his lips. It was warm inside his mouth. You wanted to dirty your sub with your seeds and make him feel like a doll in your hands. Besides, you increased the speed of the toy inside Adam's ass. He was fighting tou bring you pleasure and not to cum. His whole body must ache but you didn't really care. You wanted more. You helped a little Ainosuke with his movements. His tongue was caressing you shamelessly, and he was all focused on you. You were almost fucking his throat.

"You are really a whore my pet. Worse than a dog in heat. Loot at you"

You led his eyes to the mirror not far from you. Adam moaned when he saw the image of himself. The red hue on his cheeks while he was taking your cock into his mouth. The sight was mesmerizing. Then, lower, the pre-sperm was dripping from his own sex. Adam wasn't able to suffer it anymore and the last image had been the death of his limits and he cummed lankily on the ground. His muscles all tensed relaxed in a few seconds. He spilled his white liquid everywhere at the bottom of the armchair while he was moaning with your shaft still in his throat.

You raised your hand and gave him an echoing slap which made the blue-haired man fall on his back, covered of his dirty sperm. You perceived Adam hard cock raising between his legs.

"Kinky whore. You are not even able to handle it, right? Such a disobedient little puppy. You'll be punished, you know that, aren't you?" you threatened with a sweet voice, penetrating under Ainosuke's flesh.

You were watching your pet getting up from his position on the ground.

"Be happy that I'm not going to order you to lick it, silly kitten. On the bed, now. Twenty whiplash, and if you are not obedient, I'll double that number. Understood?"

"Please Master, no!" Adam surprisingly begged with and hoarse voice to you.

"This is the cost for your insolence and disobedience. It could be a hundred so take what I allow you" You replied without any softness.

You gave the order to your dog to be astride on the bed, on all four. Adam settled over the blankets and stayed still. The man heard you get the tool in your hand. And without telling him, he felt a painful burn on his ass, followed by your hand which rubbed it. Ainosuke heard himself grunt to the sudden soothing caress.

"It was the first. I won't be that kind after. Count them. At any mistake, It'll be thirty"

You blowed him again and your sub was counting but it was painful and red traces were appearing on his skin. You weren't soft with him and appreciated his delicious reactions of suffering and adoration. The toy was still in his ass, driving him crazy from both inside and outside. Adam wasn't able to keep up anymore and at the end on the punishment, he fell over the blankets, naked, full of shame, pleasure and love. He was crying due to the overwhelming amount of feelings. His shaft was so hard that it was painful and he wanted freedom from you. His pants were perceptible in the silence of the room. The blue-haired man felt your hand on his ribcage and forcefully turn him on his back.

He saw climb over the mattress and settle near him. Your finger roamed over your pet's belly and touch his nipples, making him shiver and grunt. Your softness was welcome for Adam. His body was aching due to tension and slaps but pleasure was still present in his blood and adrenaline was keeping him conscious. Suddenly, the toy Ainosuke had in his ass had a different movement, more intense, more rubbing and making him moan loudly.

"Did you seriously think it was ended?" you questioned with a playful tone. "No. Of course not".

You got up and put yourself in a riding way. You pushed your shaft inside Adam's mouth and start to fuck his throat again. Fingers curling down the sheets and becoming white. Your sub was testifying of this pleasure. And you were too. Your hips were getting faster and faster and Adam's eyes were rolling backwards while pleasure was burning him. You were silently moaning and keeping your features still but it was hard when your little pet's tongue was that agile and smart to find the areas able to make you shudder. It felt like eternity till you finally cummed inside of Ainosuke's mouth. Your sub swallowed everything and as a reward you ordered him to change of position and to rest on his belly. You removed the toy from his ass and caressed it softly.

"Master..." called quietly Adam.

"Mmh?" you responded with distance in your behavior towards him.

"Please. Fuck me." begged silently the man.

Where was Adam, the king of S, almost undefeated? Where was the show-off, the insane guy? You knew very well where he was. He was subdued to every of your desire now, drunken by pain and pleasure, knocked by envy. He wanted you in the simplest way. The incubus became the innocent virgin and you were his master. Nothing was left from the skater man that you met at the nightfall. He was just a body aching for softness after a hardship, pleading for quietness now. And more sincere than he never had been until tonight. He needed you.

"Please Master..." whispered again Adam.

But his begging stopped when Adam felt your dick against his hole. A slight moan escaped from him and you started to bury yourself in him. His insides were warm and comfortable but so tight. The rubbing was divine and you could help yourself but start to fuck his ass very slowly to push him to worship you. Adam had his hips hanging a little in air as you were thrusting to give you both an amazing amount of pleasure.

"P-Please Master... More..." moaned Adam while you were almost hitting his ass.

It was so nice to see the man so submitted to his needs coming from you. You couldn't help yourself but started to thrust more and more quickly and fastly. The sound of your flesh against each other was echoing in the room and you liked it. You got rougher and rougher but it was still nice and finally, you let yourself be. You felt Adam's hole tightening around your shaft for the second time. Your hands slide down his hips to find his own sex so as to apply languid caresses. It was too much for him and his muscled yet thin body sank on the bed and you followed him in his climax not long after him.

You were panting heavily and your pet was actually nearly fainting. You took him into a warm embrace and rubbed his skin to soothe him. You didn't have the time for a real aftercare because he fell asleep immediately. You would wait him to take a needed shower. For the time that you had, you left him be.

Adam had been a wonderful sub. You were happy. But you didn't have the intention to stay with him. If he wanted you, then maybe you should have a more serious and deeper conversation. But now, it wasn't what you wanted.

[erimeows]

Could we maybe get some Sentinel falling for a human and hating it headcannons/scenario? The human is just really nice and very smart! An ex Sumdak scientist who moved in with the bots and Sari after Sari got kicked out? They help them find the AllSpark? Magnus has a lot of respect for them as they've helped find the All Spark shards and done a lot of research on autobot and decepticon history and found out weaknesses. Sentinel is so angry cause Magnus clearly favors them over other humans so he has to get used to that and them? Maybe Optimus likes them and that sets Sentinel off?

Sure thing! May have twisted this a bit, but hope you enjoy!

Oh my God, he hates it with everything in his entire being.

It starts simply enough. When he arrives on earth, he notices that, like the tiny rude organic known as Sari, you’re around the Autobots all the time. Like... All the time. Helping them find All Spark fragments, doing research for them, helping Isaac Sumdak with his creations, taking care of Sari.

So, since you’re a tiny adult human and he has unchecked mental health issues that he likes to take out on others, he starts off trying to be mean to you. 

The first time, he trips you while walking past you in the hallway. You don’t notice it was intentional, but fall pretty hard and scrape your hands up so badly that you’re tearing up. Sentinel refuses to apologize or acknowledge that he’s in the wrong but feels oddly guilty and decides to help you take care of your hands. You’re very thankful, offering him a hug, which he denies and runs off because of, spewing some half-assed insults on his way out.

He can’t get you off his processor after that. He feels like a shitbag for not even owning up to being the one who tripped you and feels like a loser for helping you. You’re an organic, he hates you like the rest of them, he doesn’t feel bad for you.

Next time he sees you, he tries again to be mean to you, making a comment on what you’re wearing and asking what trashcan you dug it out of. Most humans get frustrated and yell at him or insult him back when he talks to them like that unprompted, but you only shrug him off and asks if he’s feeling alright or wants to sit down to cool down for a moment. Uh. Huh? He’s confused at first, utterly perplexed that you might think he’s weak, upset, or hurt, or... Something, but then his confusion turns to anger, and again, he storms off, unsure of how to handle someone who’s not angry at or annoyed by him.

You pay a lot of attention to him after that and he hates it; always trying to offer him things, share smalltalk, take him places, etc. He hates it even more when he notices just how much everyone else loves you, too; Sari was fine, and so was Optimus and his stupid pile of scrap metal that he called a team, but ULTRA MAGNUS? Oh, it had him fuming from his exhaust pipes. Even Ultra Magnus was charmed by you and looked for whatever excuse he could get to talk to you on earth. 

Okay, whatever. Everyone and everybot likes you, so Sentinel is convinced he hates you for that and for having a holier-than-thou attitude that won’t allow you to retaliate against him when he’s rude to you even though all he wants is for you to feed into it. Totally.

That is until he starts getting... Jealous, namely of Ultra Magnus and Optimus Prime for talking to you so much. The embarrassing thing is that he can’t even pinpoint it at first; all he knows is that he gets pissed off when he sees Optimus giving you a shoulder rub after a long day and having a conversation with him over dinner (for you) and energon (for Optimus) and gets pissed off when he sees you, a human, walking by Ultra Magnus’s side and casually conversing with him like he’s your equal. 

“I don’t get it, Jazz! Why is she talking to both of them like that? Why is it making me so mad?” 

“Could it be... You aren’t so much mad that she’s a human who’s close with Ultra Magnus, but that you’re jealous of O.P. and Ultra Magnus for being so close to (y/n) when you’re not?”

The conversation with Jazz had been impromptu and a big mistake, as he blew a fuse immediately after and had to be taken to Ratchet for some minor repairs. Everyone is concerned, no one has any idea what’s going on, but he’s stuck in Ratchet’s medbay for a day and you’re asked to watch him overnight since you’re the most qualified to do any fixes should he have any issues, and Ratchet needs to recharge. 

“So... What happened?”

“Don’t worry about it! Primus, you humans are always so nosy-” Sentinel starts scolding you and moves to get up from the medberth, but you place a gentle hand on his servo and he can’t help but freeze in place. 

“I’m not doing this with you tonight, Sentinel Prime. Recover and let me stay by your side to make sure you’re okay.”

“Just leave! I’ll be fine, I’m a member of the-”

“I know.”

“Then why do you care!?”

“Because I know you can be kind, and whether you want to or not, you need to rest and have someone monitor you over night! You blew a fuse in your head, and while that itself is a minor injury, if you do it again it’s going to be harder to fix and you could blow more. I’d rather not extent your stay in here.”

Naturally, he asks what you, as a human, could possibly know about robots/Cybertronians and their health. After getting him to lay back down, you tell him about how you used to work for Isaac Sumdac as a scientist before you started taking care of Sari when he disappeared, and that right after the Autobots arrived on earth, you studied them closely enough to figure out most of their anatomy and received some training under Ratchet to act as a second medic for them.

Oh. That makes sense. Sentinel feels a bit foolish but doesn’t say anything and waits until he can fall into recharge, but when he wakes up the next morning, you’re sitting on a stool by his berthside, passed out with your head resting on his thigh.

He doesn’t have the heart to wake you up and pretends to still be resting with his optics shut until Ratchet comes in and wakes you up himself.

He’s released with a clean bill of health and immediately goes to find Jazz.

“What do you mean by that!?”

“Uh, slow down before you blow another fuse, S.P., but you know what I meant,” Jazz laughed at him, and naturally, Sentinel took a few to process what had been said the previous day.

Jazz was implying that Sentinel wasn’t mad at you for being a human and interacting with Optimus/Ultra Magnus, but that he was mad at Optimus and Ultra Magnus for interacting with you because...

Oh. Sentinel realized that he was jealous, and in not being able to be mean to you anymore, he found himself watching you a lot. You were intelligent, kind, attractive... The opposite of him, to be honest, but when it hit him all at once, he ends up having a melt down of sorts.

Locking himself in his berth on Ultra Magnus’s ship for days on end, not drinking enough energon, going between sleeping to escape his feelings and pacing around doing nothing but dwelling on them, Sentinel Prime is a mess when he realizes that he has a crush on you. It makes sense, but... Why did it have to be an organic? He can’t even cope with it.

Eventually, he snaps out of it and decides that he’s going to take the logical approach with this; ignore his feelings and push them deep, deep down in his spark so he doesn’t have to acknowledge or deal with them. He shouldn’t like you anyways, right? You’re just a stupid human!

Except... You’re not. You’re beautiful, you’re brilliant, you’re caring, and a million other things he cares not to admit. So he’s stuck. He won’t confess his feelings to you or really think about them because he knows all he’s ever done is be mean to you, and honestly, he doesn’t deserve you and is afraid of you rejecting him.

Things stay stagnant for a while, but he’s a little nicer to you. Still rude, still making unnecessary comments about you being a human, but hey, he doesn’t try to trip you anymore and is always defending you when anyone/anybot brings up your name behind your back. Every other Autobot catches on to what’s happening but just doesn’t say anything because they know Sentinel will try to pummel them LMAO. 

But then... Valentine’s day rolls around. For whatever reason, he decides to hang around earth that day and learn about the customs since you and Sari seem excited to teach him and the other Autobots about it.

A day of romance where lovers give each other gifts... Okay, so basically, nothing to do with him, but he notices that Sari, Bee, and Bulkhead decide to go see a movie since they don’t have anyone/anybot to do anything with, and Ratchet goes off to work in his medbay, while Jazz and Prowl suddenly disappear to do their own thing and Ultra Magnus is preoccupied with work on his ship. That just leaves Sentinel, you, and Optimus.

The amount of frustration in him when Optimus hands you a bouquet of (f/c) roses is something he can’t even comprehend. So, when you walk off to go find a vase to put them in, Sentinel turns to his old friend with a glare.

“Who do you think you are? How long have you felt that way towards her?”

“Uh, Sentinel? (y/n) and I are just really good friends? I know she’s what her species would refer to as “single” at the moment and I didn’t think you’d do anything for her, so I got her those to make her feel special tonight.”

“What’s that supposed to mean!?” Sentinel exclaims at Optimus’s bold assumption that he wouldn’t do anything for you for Valentine’s day... Which was totally true. He didn’t have the guts to buy you flowers or chocolates or any of the other things that Sari said humans liked for the occasion, but apparently Optimus did, and while he now knew that Optimus didn’t have any romantic feelings towards you, it still hurt. 

“It means that even though you’ve been obsessed with her since the Elite Guard got here, you treat her with no kindness whatsoever because you’re too prideful to admit your feelings and want to cover them up,” Optimus puts a hand on his shoulder. “Now, I’m going to go spend the rest of the night with Ratchet so he isn’t by himself, but I’ll leave you to figure this out. Good luck, old buddy.”

Optimus walks off, and the words hit hard. Sentinel knows that what his friend said is right, so when you get back with the roses in a vase to set down on the table and ask him where Optimus went, he decides it’s time. Without dwelling on it too much, he grabs your hands to hold in his servos, standing in the middle of the living room and spilling his guts out to you before telling you “Happy Valentine’s Day... Or whatever,” and pulling you in for a kiss.

Thankfully, you reciprocate.

[thejacketandthehook]

The Art of Pretending 10/?

Title: The Art of Pretending

Author: thejacketandthehook (everystareverywhere on archive)

Summary: Killian Jones needs a family and needs one now. In order to impress his boss, Killian hires a single mother and her son to pretend to be his wife and son for the weekend. Nothing can go wrong, right?

Word Count: 34,028

Author's Notes: There really is no excuse for why this is taking so long to write. I think a part of me has moved on from Captain Swan (don't attack me! This happens with me - I love a couple, will always love them, but I find other couples to obsessive over.) I'm truly sorry for anyone who is waiting for the next chapter. I have the ideas, I'm just trying to get them to make sense. I hope this is worth the wait.

A3O

The snow that made Marco have to stay longer was melting, thanks to the slightly warmer day. However, the nights were below freezing, so everything that melted became ice by morning. Emma wanted to admit that she hated all of this, but she found that she just…couldn’t. No matter how much she wanted to get angry at the weather gods for letting this happen, she couldn’t. Henry looked so happy playing outside in the snow, and she herself was giggling as she helped Henry create a snowman. Perhaps, too, it had something to do with Killian coming out and maybe she was able to get a snowball right in his chest, and that made him laugh and before she really knew it, a snowball fight had broken out and—

Anyway, the point is that Emma didn’t mind being stuck in the house with the three men. Marco was lovely company. If only the man could find his way to his bedroom at night, that would have made Emma’s life easier. Though, spending her nights with Killian, even if they barely said a word to each other, was interesting. Not easier by any means of the imagination, but definitely interesting. Because it was interesting that Killian had a habit of humming to himself as he got out his clothes for the next day—Oh yes. Killian Jones was a put-the-clothes-out-the-night-before kind of man. His shoes were lined up perfectly in the closet, and if Emma noticed that they were arranged by color, well…

He also kept one book by his bedside, which she couldn’t comprehend at all. One book? She was pretty sure at home she had like ten books by her bedside, how could he only have one? And it was a book about the ocean, or something nautical like that. It looked boring as hell, but it seemed to keep his interest.

Also, who knew that Killian Jones was a boxer man, because now Emma was well aware of it. And all thanks to Marco and his inability to go to his bedroom at a reasonable time.

But that was all besides the point. Emma’s point was that being stuck in the house was not a bad thing, and she was rather enjoying herself. However, when enough snow melted for Killian to clean off the car (and someone had to come and plow the driveway because it was as huge as a highway), and he asked where they wanted to go, it was Henry would piped up, “Ice skating!”

So that’s how Emma found herself later that night on Marco’s arm after he graciously offered it to her. She saw Henry talking to David and Mary Margaret, who wasn’t ice skating but was enjoying a hot cup of coco. Regina was milling around somewhere, Emma lost sight of her. And Killian was sitting on a bench off to the side, ice skates on his feet, but in no rush to get out of the ice. She should know. She was begging him to come out with her (“Absolutely not, Swan, it’ll be a right laugh watching me ice skate.” “That’ll just make it better.” “Oy!”) when Marco intervened and offered his arm.

“I love ice skating," Emma commented as her feet gently glided along. Mr. Woodman -- Marco -- beside her still held his arm out and moved along with her, just as gently.

"It's not easy," he replied, "but it is fun, no?"

"Oh, very much so. I try to skate when I can. I didn’t do it often when I was a kid, but I'm pretty good at it."

"Really?"

"Oh yes. Henry can't believe that I have never fallen on the ice."

"That is hard to believe," he muttered slowly, looking towards the other skaters.

Just then Emma felt an oddness in her legs she never felt before on the ice. Before she could really register what was going on, her feet lost their balance and suddenly her butt was hitting the ice and her legs were flying upwards. Mr. Woodman looked down at her before putting out a hand to help her up.

"I have always found," he continued, just as slowly as she stood, "that....it is best to not be so self-assured. Life does have a way of surprising us, yes?"

Emma could feel the blood rushing to her cheeks as she wiped off the back of her jacket and rubbed her hands. "I guess so, yeah."

"We don't always realize when we're going to fall."

Emma looked sharply at Mr. Woodman, wondering what specifically he was talking about. But he just smiled and told her he wanted to try the hot chocolate before gliding ever so smoothly across the ice to the stand.

Shaking her head, Emma glided over towards Killian who she realized was talking to a beautiful young woman. Emma thought she heard the woman ask if Killian would skate with her before hearing his response.

"Oh, er,” he gently pulled his ear, “no. I’m gonna sit this one out"

She also noticed that he was taking off his gloves, and the woman must have noticed his wedding ring before nodding and walking (or stomping in those ice skates) away. Emma got off the ice and walked over to Killian before sitting beside him.

"We're cramping your style," she told him.

"Hmm? What do you mean?"

She scoffed. "Oh, come off it, Jones. You totally would have gone skating with her under normal circumstances."

"What? No," he replied shortly.

She gave a soft chuckle before shaking her head. "You forget, Jones, that I can tell when you're lying. And you, sir, are lying."

He put his arm on the back of the bench a leaned in the tiniest bit closer. Emma watched with a small smirk of her own, but didn't move. "Call me sir again, I dare you," he replied softly.

Emma stared at him for another moment before a laugh burst through her lips so loudly it sounded more like a honk than a laugh. She looked at him again as she quieted down before she started up again.

"God, Jones, you're something else." She patted him twice on his knee before she got up and kind of walked (stomped) her way over to Henry.

Killian watched her go, a small smile on his own lips before he felt someone sitting next to him.

"Seems our plan is working nicely," Regina told him, holding a to-go-cup of what was probably coffee in her hands.

His smile faded before he sifted in his seat. "Yep. Mr. Woodman is buying it."

She looked at him from the corners of her eyes, but he refused to look at her, but rather the skaters going by.

"I don't think you're doing this for Mr. Woodman," she responded.

He shrugged. "Henry said she wanted to go ice skating. He’s my kid, I have to appease him."

She nodded at that. "Yeah, okay. I kind of buy that." She paused before taking a sip of her drink, leaving a dark red lip stain behind. "But I thought you didn't like kids."

"Regina, what is this about?"

"I want to make sure you know what you're doing, Killian."

"You're the one that got me into this predicament, if you needed a reminder."

"I don't, of course not." She was silent again before she said in a lower voice, "I don't want to see anyone get hurt."

Killian sifted again before replying, "I know what I'm doing. No one is going to get hurt."

"Henry did before."

He looked at her with a raised eyebrow before she replied, "Your maid has a loose mouth. I'd watch that if I were you."

"She told you--" he couldn't even finish, almost getting up from his seat, his temper roaring again before Regina put a calming hand on his arm.

"She told me the gist, not the full details. I kind of pieced together what happened next."

"Which was?"

She shrugged. "You must have apologized and sent the biggest toy you could think of to the house."

His blood was still rushing, and his head felt heavy, but he took deep breaths as he replied, "You're half right."

"Toy?"

"I apologized."

"And he forgave you just like that? Hmm, Killian, seems you might have a fan."

Let's go home!

Killian still felt his heart pound when Henry saying that, knowing that "home" meant a lot to Emma. It meant a lot to him.

So did they.

Henry, meanwhile, was getting his balance back after having fallen over. A nice man came over and helped him up, and as Henry was rubbing his behind and shaking his head, he heard it. It was the lightest sound he ever heard, but it was dancing right there on the edge of his ear.

The sound of bells being gently rung.

He quickly looked around, skating to the edge of the ice-skating rink and looked around. But he didn’t see any bells anywhere. He definitely heard them though, so where were they coming from?

Something caught his attention from the corner of his eye and he looked over at Marco, who was buying a hot drink at the concession stand. Suddenly, Henry felt something inside, something he had never felt before, a feeling of peace washed over him so quickly he took a deep gasp.

Marco was an angel.

He was so sure of it, he would have bet his life on it. Marco must have felt Henry looking at him, because as he walked away from the stand, his eyes met Henry’s. Henry could do nothing more than look at him with almost a dumbfounded look, his eyes wide, his mouth opened just a bit. And, as though confirming exactly what Henry was thinking, Marco’s face grew serious, the most serious Henry had seen it, and simply nodded.

It was true! It was true! Marco Woodman was an angel!

Henry could barely contain his excitement as he skated as quickly as he could over to his mother, who was standing on the other side of the rink, talking to Mary Margaret “Mommy! Mommy!” he shouted, grabbing her attention. He was trying to move smoothly, but being both a child and excited meant he wasn’t exactly steady on his feet. “Mommy! He’s an angel!”

Emma shook her head and reached out for Henry when he came into arm’s distance. “What did you say?” she asked, not hearing anything other than her name.

“Mommy, it’s true!” he shouted, “He’s an—”

“Henry.”

Turning around quickly, Henry realized that Marco was right behind him, holding his hot drink and looking at Henry with both a small smile and serious eyes. “Henry, I think your father needs some help ice skating.”

Henry looked in the direction that Marco pointed, and sure enough, Killian was standing there very unsure of himself on the skates. Henry almost wanted to laugh at how Killian would back away quickly when the other skaters got too close to him. Henry looked back at Marco, who was still giving him that small smile.

“I’ll go help him,” Henry said before skating over to Killian. “Dad,” he said once he was within hearing distance. “Dad, you need help?”

Killian clung to the edge of the rink but shook his head. “No, no, my boy. I’m fine. I don’t—” his leg slipped and he almost fell, but he was able to grab the ledge in a death grip. “I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine,” Henry said rolling his eyes. He skated closer to Killian. “Hold onto me. I’ll help you.”

Killian paused, and not letting go of the ledge, asked, “You can’t be serious. I’m twice your weight!”

“I’m strong for my age. Besides, I’ll guide you.”

“Henry, I don’t know about this,” he replied, his legs almost shaking.

They young boy laughed and held out his arms. “Don’t worry! I’ll catch you!”

Looking dubious, Killian released the wall that he was just about clinging to and started to move towards Henry. However, he barely made it a foot before his legs started shaking again and he quickly went back to the wall.

Henry came a little closer and said, “You have to make sure that your ankles are straight. That’s what my mom always says, and she has never fallen down.” Killian muses that Henry didn’t notice Emma’s tumble earlier, but decidedly kept that to himself. “You just need to make sure your feet and ankles are straight and try to keep your back straight. Yeah, like that. Now,” Henry moved a few feet away. “Come towards me.”

“This is ridiculous,” Killian muttered to himself.

“You can do it!” Henry encouraged.

Still feeling beyond silly, Killian kept his ankles and feet as straight as possible before gliding over towards Henry.

When the younger boy grabbed Killian’s waist, he yelled happily with a little tune, “You did it! You did it! You didn’t have to quit it!”

Killian laughed and with one hand holding onto the wall, gently rubbed Henry’s hair. “You’re right, kid. I did it.”

What neither noticed was Emma watching from the other side of the ice rink, a hot cup of coffee in her hands. And she was wondering just how in the world this was going to end.

With heartbreak, she concluded.

~*~

Later that night, Emma was tucking Henry into bed and went to sit next to him, as Killian looked on from the doorway.

 It had become a ritual since the night, well, the night they all returned back to the house. Killian usually stood at the doorway watching silently as Emma tucked in her son and read a book to him. It’s been the same book for the last few nights, The Princess Bride, and since Killian never read the book, only saw the movie, he was just as interested as Henry was in finding out how the book played out.

“Okay,” she sighed as she grabbed the book off of his nightstand. “Let’s continue with—”

“Wait.” Henry said putting his hand on his mother’s hand, covering the book.

“You don’t want to continue with The Princess Bride? I know that it’s a little sad right now, but—”

“No, not that.” He leaned up and whispered something in Emma’s ear. Killian always thought that children were terrible at whispering, but Henry wasn’t since he couldn’t hear a word. He could only gauge that whatever he said to Emma surprised her since both of her eyebrows went up and she let out a small shocked, “Oh.”

Without another word, Emma got up from the bed and Killian wondered just what Henry whispered to her when she walked up to him and held the book out to him. “He wants you to read it to him.”

The arms he had crossed over his chest gently lowered as he looked between Emma’s small smile and Henry’s giant one. He slowly reached for the small book, a post-it sticking out on where Emma left off last night. He didn’t understand why his heart was pounding or why he suddenly became so overcome he could barely speak. He swallowed a few times before asking, “Are you sure?”

She nodded before taking a small step back so he could pass her. Killian walked over to the bed just as Henry was fixing the sheets and sat down just where Emma was. “Hello, my boy.”

“Hey, Killian.” Henry shuffled down the bed before looking back up at him. “Have you ever read to a kid before?”

Killian gave a small smile. “I must admit, I have not. Why? Have I done something wrong?”

“You’re too high up. You need to be lower.” Henry grabbed Killian’s arm and pulled, trying to bring the bigger man down to his level.

Killian was glad he had long since kicked off his shoes before placing his socked feet up on the bed and scooted down the bed until his head was lying next to Henry’s. “Better?” the older man asked.

He could feel more than see Henry nod. “Yep. Do you know where we left off?”

Killian cleared his throat before opening the book up to the post-it. “I believe it was when Fezzik and Inigo went looking for a miracle for Westley. Who was dead.”

“Mostly dead.”

Killian chuckled. “I don’t think we know that part yet.”

“Have you read the book before?”

“Er, no, actually. I’ve only seen the movie.”

“So you don’t have this book?”

“No. But it’s very good. I can see why your mom is reading it to you.”

“Yeah, it’s her favorite. She likes the character Westley, but no so much Buttercup. Buttercup needs to be saved too many times.”

“Aye, I can see that. And Westley is a pirate.”

“The Dread Pirate Roberts!” Henry almost yelled before Killian told him to be quiet through a chuckle. He looked over at the door and didn’t see Emma there, but still. Killian didn’t want to be told that he couldn’t read Henry to sleep any more because the boy was getting too rambunctious. “Sorry,” he said in a loud whisper. “The Dread Pirate Roberts!”

“Aye! Let’s see how this ends for our heroes.”

“They usually have a happily ever after,” Henry said through a yawn.

“That is true. But it’s the adventure getting there – that’s the good part!” Killian whispered before putting the post-it on his chest and clearing his throat before reading. “‘When the knocking started on his hut door, Max almost didn’t answer it, ‘Go away,’ he almost said, because lately it was only kids come to mock him…’”

Killian read about five pages before he realized that he was really reading to himself. Henry had fallen tight asleep. Killian placed the post it on the page before he got up and placed the book on the nightstand. Henry’s breathing had even out and the poor lad was almost snoring, his head tilted to the side. Killian smiled softly before fixing his blanket. Then, before he truly even realized that he had done it, he leaned down and placed a small kiss on the top of the young boy’s head. “Good night, Henry,” he whispered before turning off the lamp next to the bed, so only the nightlight on the other side of the room was on.

He walked to the door and jumped when he realized that Emma was standing there, just out of the doorway.

“Swan!” he whisper-yelled. “What are you—”

Before he could finish his thought, Emma wrapped herself around him, her arms going around his waist and her head on his shoulder.

“Thank you,” she whispered into his neck.

Killian bit his lip before wrapping her in his arms and placing a soft kiss on the top of her head. “Any time, Swan. Any time.”

What should have scared him, but didn’t, was the fact that he truly meant it with all of his heart.

~*~

The next morning, Killian, Regina, and Mr. Woodman were sitting at a restaurant, enjoying a simple brunch, discussing some business, when a waitress came over to Killian with a simple note:

Let's talk about my family. - N.

Wiping his mouth with his napkin, Killian got up and walked over towards the bar. There was a man sitting there, clearly waiting for someone as his body was positioned to face the restaurant. But he was having a drink on the rocks even though it was barely noon, with his elbows on the bar itself. Then he must have felt Killian eyes on him (or possibly the radiation of hatred that Killian was sending his way), for he looked over him and gave a big smile.

Killian's hands were so tightly fisted that he was sure he could smash through a wall in a moment. But taking a deep breath and wondering just what in hell this scumbag wanted, he walked over to Neal.

"What do you want?" Killian muttered as they sat down at an empty table.

"Well, hello to you too," Neal replied as though they were long friends meeting up at last. "I do have a few questions for you. Mainly this: what in hell are you doing with my wife and child?"

"She’s not your wife," Killian pointed out. "And you abandoned them, so what do you care?"

"They're still my family. I have every right to see them." Emma and Neal may never have married, but Henry was indeed Neal’s son. The fact that that wonderful boy shared DNA with this man boggled Killian’s mind and twisted his stomach in a way he was unfamiliar with.

"Fine. But why are you coming out of the blue like this?"

"Because I'm trying to figure out why my wife and child--"

“She’s not your wife."

"--are not at home, though Emma still has the apartment. But, apparently they are living with you. And you're married," he concluded with a small nod of his head, gesturing to the ring on Killian's left hand.

"That none of your concern."

"My family is my concern."

Killian scoffed. "Oh, so now they're your family? When it's convenient for you?"

"What in hell is going on?"

Killian sat back in his chair and crossed his arms. "Emma is helping me with a business transaction."

"By pretending to be your family?"

"Aye."

"So Mr. Geppetto over there thinks you're a family guy?"

"Why do you care?"

Neal also leaned back in his chair, and taking his drink with him before casually once more reminding Killian, "They're my family."

"You don't pick and choose when you want to be part of their lives. They're respectable people, and you need a lesson on how to be responsible."

Neal cocked his head to the side and observed, "You like them, don't you?"

"We're done here," Killian replied, pushing back his chair harshly and getting up.

"No. Not yet."

Against his better judgment, he sat back down. Killian may be young when it came to the business world, but he’s been around enough power-hungry people to know what they look like. That they only have one thing on their mind. "How much do you want?"

Neal smiled. And that smile made Killian want to scream. He knew it. This scumbag wanted nothing more than money. He didn’t care about Emma, or even worse, Henry. He only wanted a way to make a quick buck. Never in his life did Killian want to spit on anyone as much as he wanted to spit on him.

 "Let's say between 10 and 20 thousand."

Killian shrugged it off and replied, "Let's make it 20 then." He leaned forward and continued in a gravelly voice. "But let me make one thing clear: You do not contact either of them until December 26. Understand? Or do I need a five-year-old to spell it out for you?"

Neal smirked and Killian's blood rain hot. "Cute. But I agree to your demands."

Killian got up once more before taking out his wallet and giving Neal a business card. "Call my office with your information. I'll be in contact."

Neal took the card and then gave Killian a mock salute. "Pleasure doing business with you."

Before he could take three steps, however, Killian asked a question that was burning in his mind. "Why didn't you say good-bye to Henry?"

Neal stopped. "I just couldn't," he answered before he kept walking.