#Remus Lupin drabble
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anyone who thinks james potter wouldnât become the most doting boyfriend during his girlfriendâs period- armed with snacks, chocolates, movie marathons, hot water bag, playlist ready, forehead kisses, soft blankets, massages, enough compliments to outshine shakespeare, and declaration of war against cramps- clearly doesnât understand him
#james potter#marauders era#moony#padfoot#sirius black#remus lupin#the marauders#jily#jegulus#jegulily#wolfstar#dorlene#rosekiller#dead gay wizards#sirius x reader#james x reader#james potter x reader#james potter imagine#james potter smut#james fleamont potter#james potter drabble#sirius black imagine#sirius black x reader#sirius black smut#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin smut#the marauders era#prongsfoot
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You give yourself a haircut before your date with Remus, his reaction doesnât disappoint in the slightest wc: 609
âClose your eyes Remmy!â You announce as you hear the front door open. Your heels click clack against the tiles as you hustle to the living room.
Youâve just finished styling your hair and getting ready for yours and Remusâ date and youâve done something you think heâs going to love.
You love it, so youâre pretty sure heâs going to as well.
âWhat did you do?â Thereâs amusement in his voice as you step into the living room and find his hand over his eyes and his other one holding a bouquet of the yearâs first tulips.
âThank you for the flowers,â you lean up and kiss his lips, sticky gloss coating his as you pull back but all Remus does is rub his lips to father with a smile.
âPresumptuous, it could very well be for the woman I sweet talked into the table overlooking the pier.â
You hit his chest softly with a scoff. âMaybe I shouldnât show you.â
Remus coos, wrapping his arm around your waist as his lips coast your neck. It makes your skin heat at how aware he is of you even with his eyes covered.
âPlease show me baby,â his words are practically branded into your skin and you sigh.
âMove your hand,â you say softly, leaning back as he does so he can see you fully.
Remus groans when his eyes focus, hands appreciative when they reach to the ends of your hair.
âMy love,â thereâs a bit of husk to his voice that you werenât expecting but as he twists a curl around his finger and gives you another once over you canât help but feel a bit bashful. âYou cut it!â You nod, nibbling on your lip as Remus gives you his full attention. âYou look so good.â
You smile- beam is a better word- under his compliment, even more so when his fingers tickle the base of your neck.
âWould I mess it up if I ran my hands through it?â
You shake your head, curls sticking to the dewy setting spray youâd used.
âThatâs kind of the point of it. To look a bit like bed head.â
Remus groans again, setting the flowers down and sinking both his hands into your hair and pulling you closer for a kiss.
Remus kisses you like heâs been thirsty all day and youâre a drink of cold water.
Just before he pulls away, he nibbles on your bottom lip and sighs all pleased.
âYouâre gonna send me into cardiac arrest, dove.â
He sounds all breathless and it makes your heart hammer even harder against your chest.
âIâm not trying to.â
Remus laughs, pecking your lips again before stepping back to take in your entire outfit.
Youâre in a deep wine purple dress, the skirt of it falling to mid-shin. The bodice is snug to your curves with a square neckline that makes you look even more beautiful. Youâre also wearing the necklace Remus had gotten you as an anniversary gifts a few years ago- rose quartz on a dainty chain that sits just along your collarbones.
Remus didnât notice it before but you smell amazing too- like caramel, honey and milk.
âYouâre definitely trying too, dove.â
You giggle bashfully, even more so when he reaches back for the flowers and hands them to you.
âThank you, Remmy.â You give him another kiss, glad that youâd just done liner and gloss because heâd look a mess if youâd worn your lipstick- not that Remus would mind all that much.
âCan I take a photo? Iâm due a new lock screen.â
Youâre a few minutes late for the reservation but Remus has his new lock screen photo and a few kisses beneath his shirt as well.
#remuslupin#remus lupin#remus lupin oneshot#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin x black reader#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x yn#remus lupin x y/n
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Gentleman | R.L.
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summary: remus lupin is the perfect gentleman.
pairing: remus lupin x fem!reader
includes: fluff, you and sirius are practically siblings, rem defending his girlfriend, someone gets pushed off a boat
a/n: all my inspo literally comes from the music i listen to đ
James had invited the entire group down to the lake for the summer because it was the last summer before the last year of Hogwarts. He thought it should be memorable, and everyone loved the idea. His parents allowed him to borrow the lake house and boat, but only if everyone's parents were okay with it. Of course, your parents trusted you with your friends. The only rule was to stay in separate rooms from your boyfriend. Oopsies.
As the Pottersâ boat slowed to a calm stop, the summer wind continued to blow through the air, the clouds nonexistent in the blue sky. The sun shimmered across the lake water and the radio played the top hits of the month, the sound drowning from the talking of the boatâs riders.
When Sirius had enough of all the chitchat, he quickly shed himself of his top and jumped into the lake water, splashing Marlene who was trying to tan on the boats end. She cursed him out and threatened to pull the ladder away when he splashed her again.
Witnessing the entire interaction, you hid a laugh behind a smile and left the girls to sit beside Remus who was sitting underneath the shade of the boat. You tucked your legs underneath your lap and leaned your chin on his shoulder. On instinct, his calloused hand found the space underneath your calf and gently squeezed even when talking to James. You admired his face glowing in the sun for a beat, eyes following the scars that were left behind from bad nights before he finally turned and met your loving eyes.
âHey.â You murmur and grin when you felt him press a soft kiss to your lips. âSirius just went into the water." He hummed and kissed you again, making you hum and separate once more. "You don't want to join him?â
âAnd leave you here all by yourself? What type of man do you think I am?â He thumbed your leg and felt for the rushing blood, ensuring there was a pule and that you were in fact real. It was a habit he was quick to have learned because of a full moon incident a year ago.
You shrug and rest your cheek on his shoulder instead, watching the gulls fly by and circle the food James was grilling. As he tried fighting them off with tongs, Lily and Dorcas began to draw sunscreen images on Marlene's back, not bothering to cover up their giggles.
âYou donât want to join the girls?â Remus tilted his head and scanned your side profile, following the contour of your face. He memorized every single bump and crease, gingerly tucking a piece of loose hair behind your ear when you looked back over at him.
You raise a brow at his guilty smile and analyze his mannerism, rubbing the one bit of sunscreen into his cheek. "What?"
âYou just wanna stay in the shade with me, don't you, dovey?" He brought his hand up and gently cupped your cheek, pulling you close enough so he could press a kiss to your temple.
âOf course, wherever you are, I follow.â You grin as a blush creeps up your neck, not realizing Sirius had gotten out of the water and rolled his eyes at how affectionate the both of you were being.
âYou two are so gross." He covered his eyes before shaking his head like the dog he was â ridding himself of all the water he brought up with him.
You groaned when you got hit with the water, glaring at the long-haired boy. He stuck his tongue out at you which you retaliated with your middle finger. You swore that Sirius had a secret hatred for you since you began dating Remus over a year ago.
Sirius gasped at your gesture and put a hand on his chest, returning the finger. Remus rolled his eyes at the both of you and gave you a pointed look, making you cover it with your hand.
"Prongs, do something! The lady won't go down without a fight!" SIrius complained and popped a soda can out of the cooler, leaning against the railing of the boat.
âMate, I donât know what you want me to do.â James threw him a confused look and reached inside the cooler to hand Lily her own can. "Besides, I can't do much here."
âYou could toss her over board." Sirius muttered loud enough for you to whip your head toward him and glare.
"You were being mean first!" You move to stand only to be pulled back down into your seat. From the corner of your eye, you saw Remus pursing his lips in thought, making you sigh. "Remâ"
âSit.â He practically commanded, rolling his eyes once more when you crossed your arms and legs in annoyance. But when you noticed his quick wink, you realize what he was going to do.
You smiled slyly toward Sirius when he met your eyes again. The poor unsuspecting bloke. Sirius gave you an annoyed look and went to say something â probably insulting all women â when Remus pulled him aside.
Assuming Remus was going to hangout with him instead of you, Sirius stuck his tongue out before yelping in surprise as Remus pushed him off the boat. Your eyes widened with a smile, stretching your neck to see where Sirius was flailing. The three girls burst out into laughter at the predicament and quickly moved away from all the splashing water, grabbing a polaroid to take a picture before he could get out. James just shook his head in disbelief, clasping his arm around Siriusâ and helping him up.
Remus tossed a towel in Sirius' direction before sitting beside you again, kissing the side of your head like nothing happened. You gave him cheeky smile and laced your hand with his.
âWhat a gentleman.â You chide before letting out a noise of surprise at the feeling of his lips on yours, dropping your hand to lay flat on his chest.
âSome gentleman you are.â Sirius muttered as he dried himself off. When he realized Remus was staring back at him with an unimpressed look, he took a huge step back behind James and quickly apologized. âKidding, Iâm kidding.â
You send him another death glare before staring up at Remus with soft eyes as he thumbed your palm, a small smile taking over your face. "You know we're probably going to get pranked anytime soon, right?"
"As long as I spend quality time with you, I think I'll be fine. Besides, he won't try anything too bad." Remus tilted your head up with his index finger. "I'm a gentleman anyway."
©lqveharrington - all rights reserved. do not copy, translate or share my work on other media platforms
#augustâs works đ«§#augustâs ts works đȘ©#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin hc#remus lupin fic#remus lupin headcanon#remus lupin fanfiction#remus x reader#remus lupin#remus lupin x reader#remus x you#remus lupin x you#remus lupin angst#remus lupin oneshot#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin x self insert#remus lupin x y/n#remus x y/n#the marauders#marauders x reader#x reader#harry potter#harry potter x reader#hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry#hogwarts x reader
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remus one shot where he canât stop blushing around the reader because he has a huge crush on her and sirius and james are like dude please ask her out already?? đ
cw: the trials and tribulations of a restaurant job, semi-confident reader (or at least she can withstand Sirius' flirting, which I couldn't), James and Sirius' shameless wingmanning
shy!Remus x fem!reader ⥠1.1k words
The cafe is crammed. Youâve almost tripped over two kids already whose parents let them run loose, you did let a glass slip from your tray when a customer stuck his leg out into the walkway without looking, and youâve quickly reached the conclusion that today was definitely the wrong day to break in your new work shoes. Youâre on your last straw at only ten in the morning, but your pasted-on smile becomes twice as genuine when you see a table of your favorite regulars.Â
âHi,â you say warmly, clicking your pen and readying it above your pad. âHow are we doing today?âÂ
Youâre greeted with two dazzling grins from one side of the booth and a shyer smile from the other.Â
âY/n,â says Sirius, in his suave, flirtatious way (youâve learned not to take it personally), âyouâre looking stunning.âÂ
You know your hair is suffering from the weather outside and thereâs orange juice down the front of your apron, but you smile at him anyway. âThank you, so are you.âÂ
âHowâs your morning going?â James asks. These boys are never ones to skip over pleasantries to get to their meal, and while with other tables you might try to hurry them along, you never mind in this case. Today especially, you welcome the break.Â
âOh, itâs going,â you try to joke, looking pointedly down at your orange juice stain. âCould be worse.âÂ
He makes a face. âYikes.âÂ
âItâs fine,â you say breezily. âWhat can I get you?âÂ
You look to James, because really heâs the only one you ever need to ask. The other two are fairly consistent, but James seems inclined to try something new every time he comes in.Â
He doesnât disappoint now, locking eyes with you seriously over the top of his menu. âHow is your butterfly lemonade? Noâactually, what is your butterfly lemonade?â
âItâsâŠâ You bite your lip, thinking. Sirius snickers, and when you look he seems to be sharing in some joke with Remusâ, whose cheeks have gone a tad pink. âIâm not sure, honestly, but itâs sweet. I think youâd like it.âÂ
âThat, then.â James slaps down his menu decisively.Â
âRight.â You write it down. âAnd then, a caramel latte and a tea?â You look to Sirius and Remus for confirmation.Â
The former shoots you a grin you take as a yes, while the latter nods and says quietly, âThank you.âÂ
âNo problem.â You soften your smile for Remus. You adore all of these boys, but you have a bit of a tender spot for him. Remus is by far the quietest of his friends, though really just as friendly when he does talk. Itâs terribly endearing.Â
You click your pen again. âOkay, back soon!âÂ
The boysâ table remains a bright spot in your morning for as long as theyâre there. Their antics youâre rather used toâthe flirting, and the pranks, and the teasing way both James and Sirius poke at Remus while his blush worsens and worsensâbut it surprises a laugh out of you when you joke that youâll have to spit in Remusâ food if he orders the brioche (which infamously holds up the kitchen every time) and Sirius snorts doubt heâd mind before yelping and jumping in his seat. By the time youâre bringing them their ticket, the cafe has reached its late morning lull and your day is remarkably brighter than it started off.Â
You seem to be interrupting some sort of debate when you approach their table, Remus leaning forward to whisper across the booth before he catches sight of you and sits back. The tops of his cheekbones are tinged pink. Sirius, on the other hand, is grinning wickedly, whereas James looks mostly exasperated.Â
âThank you,â James says kindly, taking the ticket from you. Remus starts rifling through his pockets for cash, but Sirius only looks at you as though sizing you up.Â
âY/n,â he starts to say, ignoring how Remusâ eyes narrow in his direction, âare you seeing anyone at the moment?âÂ
You feel your eyebrows lift. âNot currently, no.âÂ
âBut why not?â He affects a look of puzzled contemplation, propping his chin on his hand. âYouâre a pretty girl. Are you not looking to date?âÂ
You shrug, fighting the urge to cross your arms defensively. Itâs not that youâve never gotten these sorts of personal questions from customers before, but you werenât expecting them from this table; you thought you knew better than to take Siriusâ flirting seriously. âNothing has come up lately, I guess.âÂ
âDo you fancy men?â
âSirius,â Remus hisses. âLeave her alone.âÂ
âWhat?â Sirius spreads his hands, guileless. âNone of us would care if you didnât, lovelyâwell, some might care, but no one would hold it against youââ He yelps for the second time today, this time shooting a glare at his friend across the booth. âAnyway, you donât have to say if you arenât comfortable.âÂ
Youâre laughing a bit now, half nervously. âNo, thatâs okay. I do, yeah.âÂ
âInteresting.â James sets down the ticket. It seems you have his full attention now. âAnd what do you think of our Remus?âÂ
Remus makes a horrified sputtering sound, and you turn to find him looking at James in betrayal. Heâs pink to the tips of his ears.Â
You canât help a small smile as you catch on. âI think he seems very sweet.âÂ
âMm, well spotted.â James nods, tenting his hands like a man at a business meeting.Â
âYes, very good taste,â Sirius agrees.Â
âHeâs a dateable bloke, no?â James asks you. He jolts in his seat a little, but doesnât yelp like Sirius had. Remus appears caught between wanting to hide his face in his hands and wanting to burn his friends to cinders with his gaze. Heâll be lucky, you think amusedly, if he doesnât burn himself up first. The hue of his blush is only getting deeper.Â
âHe is,â you agree. You look at Remus again. This time, he meets your eyes, his look softening.Â
âIâm so sorry,â he says miserably.Â
Your grin spreads. âNo, donât be.âÂ
âSo would you like to date him?â James furthers.Â
Remus does put his head in his hands now, letting out a muffled groan. âJames.âÂ
âWhat? Clearly you arenât going to do it yourself, and I am sick of trying to eat my breakfast whilst you moon overââ He jumps in his seat again, and goes quiet, reaching down to rub at his leg. You tuck your lips in to hide a smile.Â
âIâm just going to take this,â you say, reaching for the customer copy of their receipt. You bend over, scrawling your number down on the signature line. âAnd if anyone has more questions for me later, they can give me a ring. Okay?âÂ
You look at Remus. He looks nauseous and stop-sign red, but he manages to give you a small smile. âAlright,â he says, tentatively.
âPerfect. Bye, boys.â You shoot them a wave as you go to your next table. You hope Remus sees how your smile is really only for him.
#remus lupin#shy!remus lupin#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x fem!reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x self insert#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fic#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin scenario#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin oneshot#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#the marauders#hp marauders#marauders era#marauders x reader
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đ°đąđ„đŠđđ§đ đŹđđ«đđđ
part one | chapter listÂ
You find yourself drawn into Remusâ life after an awful night you canât remember. He does his best to hold onto you. [10k]
cw: heavy themes, implied sexual assault of the reader [with no graphic scenes but itâs a continuous theme, so please be careful when reading], pregnancy, eventual friends to lovers, friendships, hurt/comfort, james makes a lot of soup, found family
đŠč
The pharmacy on Wilmand Street is always deathly quiet. The boy behind the counter reads and occasionally picks up the phone to put it back down, his hair in his eyes, a waxiness to his pale skin that never fails to perturb.Â
Your shoes creak over the hardwood floor. Heâs noticed your entry, signalled by a golden bell above the door and your muffled panting, but he hasnât looked up.Â
Your eyes slide past pads, nighttime, ultra-long panty liners, searching with a poorly restrained desperation for something in particular.Â
The phone rings âdark-haired boy picks it up and puts it back down again as you recalled, silencing the ring. You watch him from over your shoulder and he looks up from his book to stare.Â
âPregnancy tests?â you ask.
His expression doesnât change as he pulls a drawer open behind the desk with a metallic clink. âWhat kind?âÂ
âThe most reliable. Please.âÂ
He gives a nod, black curl bobbing under his chin. He grabs a blue card box and places it on the counter. âSixteen fifty.âÂ
You open your purse before youâve reached him, extracting the change exactly and tipping it next to his book. âThank you.âÂ
âAre you alright?âÂ
Your heart squeezes in your chest like a tightening fist. âWhy?âÂ
âI have to ask. Iâm a mandated reporter.âÂ
âIâm not a child.âÂ
He levels your look with his own. âYou donât have to answer. Iâm only asking because you look upset. Are you alright?âÂ
You donât think youâve ever heard him say more than three words at a time. His voice is reminiscent of someone elseâs, half-remembered. You want to ask him, then. The questions youâve had since it happened. Why does it hurt so badly, still? But the boy, while seemingly well-intentioned, isnât one you trust to care nor keep it to himself.Â
âFine,â you reply, pressing the blue-boxed test into your pocket, pulling the hood of your coat up to brace against the December rain. Youâre fine.Â
The door opens before you can get to it, another lovely dark-haired boy letting himself inside. His stare is blank as the one at the deskâs is, but you smile on instinct and he smiles back warmly after a moment, holding the door for you to leave.Â
âOkay, Reg?â you hear him ask as you pass.
âClose the door,â Reg says. âYouâre letting in the cold.âÂ
â
Itâs even colder the next time you go. You throw on another hoodie and wrap a scarf tightly around your neck, face ducked, nose tickled by flyaway fibres. The walk to Wilmand Street takes seventeen long minutes where your hands hurt, then shake, chapped by hateful winds.Â
The pharmacyâs newspapered window comes into view. A poster for the local pub leaks ink on the outside, wet by the rain, its font blooming like fungus across purple paper. Live music event: December 31st.Â
The dark-haired boy ïżœïżœïżœReg?â is behind the counter again. The first one. Are you alright? boy. He looks twenty so or near that, but thereâs something wilfully young about the skin under his eyes, despite a more haggard pinch to his brow. You were hoping it would be the second one, or the sandy-haired boy who mans the till in the very early mornings. He has a more natural smile than the other two. Perhaps not more authentic, but quicker to perk up when you slink in for whatever before work, Mondays and Fridays if heâs there.Â
Reg doesnât lift his head. You push yourself toward the back of the pharmacy. Itâs a small shop slotted between two others, one wall touched from the next in thirty seconds should you walk it. It makes pretending youâre there for other things useless and embarrassing, but you do it anyway. Another test wonât change what you wanted the test to say, but you canât take one single test and trust it was right.Â
âReliable?â Reg asks when you finally approach.Â
âYeah. And the five strip box, too, if you have it.âÂ
Reg takes them from the drawer and adds their prices seemingly in his head. âEighteen eighty-nine.âÂ
You pass him a twenty pound note and wait for your change, not bothered that he counts it slowly, or that he puts it down flat on the counter away from your outstretched hand. âThanks,â you murmur.Â
He noticeably bites his tongue.Â
âI want to be sure, is all,â you say.Â
âIf you go to the doctorâs, they do it for free. And it has a ninety nine percent rate of accuracy.âÂ
You hold the tests to your stomach. âIâm not⊠really sure what Iâd want them to tell me, right now.âÂ
âTheyâd tell you the truth, at least.â Reg seems to decide this line of conversation isnât one he wants to continue, and he lets his mouth flatten into a thin, white line. You get the sense though that he isnât done talking, and are rewarded for your patience with an inkling of an almost-smile. âPlease know that Iâm bound by duty of care while I work here, so if you are concerned about something, I can listen and offer advice. And if you donât want to tell me private information, my uncle is the acting pharmacist, and he is more strictly bound by patient confidentiality law.â He looks you in the eye. âYouâre only as alone as you allow yourself to be.âÂ
âWho says that?â you ask, poked by the way he lays it out.Â
Reg doesnât like your question and doesnât answer. He picks up his book, murmuring, âI hope they give you the result you want.âÂ
A different dark-haired boy is standing outside of the pharmacy when you leave. With a nice nose, eyes like a puppy, heâs handsome but hidden behind black frames. He stands from his car where heâd been leaning when the door swings out, sits back again when he realises youâre not who heâs looking for. âSorry, lovely,â he says, pulling at a loosely-knotted tie. âI thought you were someone else.âÂ
âSorry,â you say back, holding the tests to your chest.Â
Your hand covers the boxes. His eyes flicker down to them regardless. You wait for disdain or embarrassment but see neither. Really, the only thing this new boy wears is pleasantness.Â
âDonât stay out too long, will you?â he asks, smiling genially, âYouâll freeze.âÂ
âIâmââ You clear your throat, caught off guard to have a stranger care about you so openly. No reluctance to his well wishes, and no strings. âSorryâ Iâm going home now. I wonât stay out.âÂ
âGood, shortcake. Have a good night.âÂ
You should say you too. The wind chases you back to your flat, where you head for the bathroom, and, despite living alone, lock the door.Â
â
You take your pregnancy test and sit on the floor, too weak-legged to stand at the sink, waiting for two pink lines.Â
Sure enough. Control, result. One solid pink line, and one much lighter. It doesnât matter âa positive is a positive, no matter how weak. The strip tests say the same thing.Â
In TV and movies, people always paint the test as the ultimate moment. As though the result is the result, and that everything after is fixed, but the result now is only a signifier for another decision to be made: will you keep your baby, or foetus? Do you feel as though it is a baby, or a foetus, or both? Is it welcome, or a foreign object? There is no right or wrong answer, only how you feel.Â
The migraine you get then is debilitating. Like toothache in every tooth, pain behind your eyes half-psychosomatic, half physiological stress. Youâre not sure how long youâre in the bathroom holding your forehead, but itâs dark when you manage to stand again, and the tests have only gotten more obviously positive. You throw them all in the bin.Â
â
The third day you go back to Wilmand Street pharmacy, the desk is manned by your unfamiliar, smiling boy. He looks up when the door opens, his eyes browned honey set in a face that recently saw the sun, but not too much of it. Kissed by it. His cheeks are pinked. He must be the first person whoâs worked here to bother turning on the heating.Â
âMorning,â he says.
âMorning,â you say back. Voice croaky, you remember to be polite. âYou okay?âÂ
âIâm great, lovely, thank you. How are you?â He gives a nod toward the street. âItâs so cold out, are you gonna be warm enough in your jumper?âÂ
You find yourself struck as you were the day before, so startled by genuine kindness that you can hardly work your mouth. âIâm okay. Iâm going right back home after this.âÂ
âAw, good.âÂ
You nod. What are you here for today? Not another test. You arenât stupid enough to believe a third round will give you a different verdict, but youâd felt an urgent need to move.Â
You grab a rounded basket from near the door and make your way to the haircare. Thereâs a handful of shampoos to choose from. You take the usual. Beneath them are baby shampoos and soaps. On a whim you pick one up, the words Tear and fragrance free stuck like a bad swallow at the back of your throat.Â
Babies need so many things. At the supermarket they have these great walls of baby food and itâs expensive enough to take your eye out every time. A quarter of an hours wage for every organic, soft meal, and sure, they donât need organic, vegetables are organic intrinsically, whatever, but if you donât buy organic pre-made meals you have to make the baby food yourself, how long does that take? You put the baby shampoo down and turn to the conditioners.Â
Unhappy, you scour them for nothing and turn on the spot. Why is Dr. Black never here? How are you supposed to ask him your questions if he doesnât show up to work?Â
Youâll have to ask the brown-haired boy. Nice eyes, nice smile. He probably wonât judge you, at least not out loud.Â
He stands up from his rickety chair, soft leather seat worn and creaking as he pushes it away. âYeah?â he asks.Â
âDo you have to do that patient-confidentiality thing?âÂ
He smiles rather gently. âI do. A condition of my employment is to protect patient information. Legally, I canât share private or sensitive information about you to anyone else in the world, unless I believe youâre in proper danger.â He holds his hands behind his back. âIs there something you wanted to ask me?âÂ
Wind roars outside. Your eyes start to the door.Â
âThereâs a private room in the back,â he adds.Â
âI donât want to waste your time.âÂ
âItâs not wasted. Even if I werenât legally obligated to keep whatever secrets you may have, Iâm worried you look a bit poorly.â
He speaks oddly. Or not odd, but different to any of the other men youâve met. Itâs friendly, and yet somehow heâs quiet, too. His interest feels real, so you cross the room to the desk and put your basket on your shoes.Â
You try to find a way to say it. âI know youâre not a doctor.âÂ
âNo, Iâm an apprentice pharmacist.âÂ
âRight. I know I should go to the doctor, and not you.âÂ
âThat depends. Weâre here to help. Doesnât matter if you should go somewhere, you can ask me first.âÂ
You struggle. He waits. His hands lay steady on the edge of the desk, his face nearly blank besides a hint of warmth. Â
âIs it alright if itâs a question about, um, sex?âÂ
He nods emphatically. âOf course thatâs alright. I canât promise Iâll know the answer, but youâre welcome to ask me anything and I can always get back to you if youâre not willing to ask someone else.â His smile turns wry. âI know itâs uncomfortable, but itâs only sex. I donât mind.âÂ
âI justâŠâ You hold your hands together. âI wanted to know, if pain after⊠if itâs supposed to hurt so much after.âÂ
His wry smile is quickly subdued, though he remains friendly looking. âIt depends,â he says, measured, âon a few things. You probably know that the first time you have sex can be painful because of the initial perforation of the hymen, but usually sex isnât supposed to be painful at all.âÂ
âAt all.âÂ
âNo. If sex hurts, itâs likely from a lack of preparation, bruising of the cervix, or it could be a condition called vaginismus. Thatâs where your muscles tighten suddenly when you attempt penetration. Having sex with vaginismus can be extremely painful.âÂ
Something on his chest catches the light. A name tag.Â
He follows your gaze. âOh,â he says. âIâm Remus. Sorry, it mightâve been nicer for you to know that before I started talking.âÂ
Remus⊠You shake your head at him. âUm⊠Remus⊠Well, Iâm not really sure what happened.âÂ
âRight.âÂ
âI wasnâtââ Your heart jumps before you can confess, horrible secret stuck to the roof of your mouth.Â
âIâm sorry,â he says, âare you sure you donât want to go sit down in the quiet room with me? I can make you a cup of tea.âÂ
âI canât have caffeine.âÂ
âI have night time tea. Is that alright?âÂ
âThe shop?âÂ
âItâs okay, Iâll ask Sirius to come down. You really arenât doing anything wrong.âÂ
âI feel like I shouldn't ask you.âÂ
âThatâs a consequence of our great British society,â he says, lightly teasing as he lifts the counter to come from behind it and presses a small red button on an intercom box by the inside door. Itâs an attempt to make you feel better, and it nearly works. âYou feel embarrassed about something you have no reason to feel embarrassed of. Everybody has sex, and everybody has bad sex, sometimes, and needs advice.âÂ
The intercom crackles before you can speak. âMoony?â a voice asks.Â
âSirius, I have someone who needs to talk to me. Youâll have to come on the till for a bit.âÂ
âKay. Down now.âÂ
Remus smiles. âThatâs about as obliging as he gets.âÂ
âSirius, is he theâ is he the one who reads?âÂ
âNot often. Youâre thinking of Regulus, his brother.âÂ
Regulus, of course. âThey look so similar.âÂ
âThey do.â He gestures for you to stand beside him as the inside door swings open, unveiling one of those dark-haired brotherâs, the taller of the two.Â
âOh, hi,â Sirius says, wet hair on his shoulders, his t-shirt sodden at the front like heâd swept it back, âokay? Thereâs biscuits in the left cupboard, Moons.âÂ
Remus, Moons, Moony, holds the door back and lets you inside.Â
The walk to the quiet room is strange. Sitting down at the table with him as he passes you a box of biscuits, kettle boiling, he doesnât put you on ends, but it doesnât feel good. You slip your hand under your t-shirt where he canât see and feel the hot stretch of your stomach for something that isnât there.Â
âSo,â he says, grimacing, âIâm going to ask you some precursory questions. You donât have to answer any of them if you donât want to.âÂ
âOkay.âÂ
âAre you in any active danger?âÂ
You shake your head slowly. âNone.âÂ
âIs someone close to you hurting you?âÂ
âNo.âÂ
âAre you alright?âÂ
You twist your hands together tightly. âI donât think so.âÂ
âNo?â He slips his chair closer to your own. âAre you hurt now?âÂ
You look down at your lap. This is awful. This is why you didnât want to go to see your doctor. âI donât know. Iâm not hurt, but it does hurt. I move and it feels like something sharp is digging into me.âÂ
âI see.â He frowns. âThis can happen sometimes with penetration. Itâs like I said before, if your body isnât, you know, prepared? If you arenât using lubrication, if you arenât relaxed, it can be as simple as friction having hurt you, but itâs possible youâve got cervical bruising, or an issue with your pelvic floor. It could be that you have a UTI. If we go through a couple of questions together I might be able to suggest a solution, but I have to tell you to see your doctor if you can. Alright? Pain after sex can be normal, but it doesnât have to be. When we go back out, Iâll give you some paracetamol as well.âÂ
He looks as though he might have something else to say, but he stops when you open your mouth. âI donât know what happened.âÂ
Remus frowns again. âRight.âÂ
The cellophane on the biscuits is shining under the light.Â
âI donât really know what to do.âÂ
âItâs a stabbing pain?â His frown gets impossibly deeper. âI have some ibuprofen. Off the record, you can have some of that with your tea. Here.â He procures a blister pack from his pocket and hands it to you, jumping up for the kettle, carrying it back to your mugs to set with the pint of milk. âIt will probably go away soon, lovely, I would try not to worry, but itâs good to keep an eye on it too, and to book with the doctors if it gets worse. There are so many things that can go wrong in the body, but weâre also such good self-healers, itâs hard to know what to do.âÂ
âItâs⊠something else, too.âÂ
âYeah?âÂ
âI was wondering if the pain is maybe because IâŠâÂ
Your face goes hot as coal embers, a furious sweat on the back of your neck. Remus doesnât prod. He pours water into your mug until itâs a little over half full, the tea bag at the bottom staining it sepia.Â
âI think Iâm pregnant,â you say, not sure why it hurts to say so much.Â
âRight.â
âDo you think it hurts because of that?âÂ
Remus bites his lip as he pours his own mug of tea. Heâs looking at you as he puts the kettle down. âNo, I wouldnât think so, but itâs not an impossibility. How pregnant were you thinking?âÂ
âIt was two weeks ago, so⊠so however long it takes to get pregnant.â
He looks alarmed, then. âLovely, that was the last time you had sex?âÂ
âYeah.â
âAnd it still hurts now?âÂ
âOnly sometimes,â you say nervously.Â
He ignores his steaming tea. âRight. Well, I think I need to advise you to make an emergency appointment today. I can make it with you. You shouldnât still be hurting after two weeks, pregnant or not. Ectopic pregnancies donât tend to hurt until further along, soâŠâ Remus slows, looking at you with that too-kind frown, brown eyes darker back here behind the fog curls of his tea.
You feel caught on something.Â
âI wasnât awake,â you say quietly. âJust woke up hurting. I guessed what happened, ân now Iâm pregnant. It could only have been...â You shrug it off, even as heat blooms behind your eyes, nose already hot and sniffly.Â
âYou were assaulted.âÂ
âYeah, I guess so.âÂ
Remus seems to freeze up. âIâm sorry.â He takes a few seconds, and then he meets your eyes. âI canât imagine how scary that must have been, and how scary it still is.âÂ
Your eyes line with tears. âI mean, itâs less scary now.â First tear tips forward as your voice falls to pieces. âI just donât know what to do. Every day Iâve come here this week Iâve tried to ask about it, because I saw that poster, if Iâm hurt then I canâ then I can come to the pharmacy, but Iâm not hurt, Iâm fine now.âÂ
âOh,â he says gently, pushing his chair over a little to bring himself closer, his hand coming to rest on your hunched shoulder, âeven if you werenât in any pain at all, youâre more than welcome to come here and speak to us, to me. This residual pain, I imagine you mustâve been quite injured when it happened. You didnât have any help at all?âÂ
âI didnât think thereâs anything they could do.âÂ
âThatâs okay, itâs not your fault,â he says, rubbing your shoulder kindly. âI just want to know as much of the details as you feel alright giving me, so we can move forward in the best way possible.â His hand slides across your back, nearly hugging. âIâm sorry. Really. And Iâm sorry for talking so much about âbad sexâ, I didnât realise what you were telling me.âÂ
âIâm sorry for telling you.âÂ
âWhat?â he asks, a soft incredulity to him, âYou have nothing to be sorry for. You can tell as many or as few people as you like, but Iâm extremely glad to be told, because no one should ever have to face this sort of thing alone, should they?â He rubs your back when you nod, again when you sniffle. âAlright. Itâs alright. Youâre okay.âÂ
You donât cry as much as you worry you might under a soft touch. The memory of waking up paralyses you for a bit, that confusion, the pain, the bruise across your neck. All of it makes you feel sick, but Remus shushes you under his breath, not to really shush you, but to calm you down.Â
âIâm okay,â you say, shamed.Â
âTry and drink some of this tea. Can I leave you alone for a minute?âÂ
âOh, uhâ yeah, of course. Iâm fine.âÂ
His hand lingers between your shoulders. âJust for a minute, Iâm going to find some bits for youââ
âI donât need anythingââ
âNo, no, itâs okay, itâs just stuff I have to give you, and some things you might need.â Remusâ hand traces carefully to the front of your shoulder. He meets your eyes, nothing but compassion in the line of his mouth. âOkay?â
You say okay. Remus uses the door you came in through to head back out onto the pharmacyâs shop floor, letting it shut quietly behind him. You press your hand to your teeth.Â
â
To Remusâ credit, he apologises for both pamphlets. Abortion Explained. What to expect when youâre expecting. âFor you to know your options,â heâd said. âWhatever you decide, itâs your decision.âÂ
He canât know youâll spend a week pouring over them all, that youâll worry at the corner of the STD clinic card, or that youâll shove the RapeCrisis one down the side of your bed, desperate to throw it out, but terrified youâll need it, too.Â
And some of the stuff he gives you. You donât even know what to do with it. Painkillers, lavender oil, discreet pads for incontinence. Youâd tried to pay and heâd touched the back of your hand without explanation. âNo, itâs okay,â heâd said. Nothing else.Â
You spend days again wrapped in your own nausea, until Thursday evening, when you make your way to Community Support.Â
You honestly werenât considering it when Remus first gave you the card, but he said his friend worked there, âMy best friend, James,â he corrected, âand his wife, Lily, too. She talks to people about all kinds of things. I just wonder if you might feel happier talking about it with a woman.âÂ
Which was a nice sentiment, and possibly true, though Remus had been the first person you told. To be met with his sympathy in such a boundless capacity made it easier. Made you think, Maybe Iâm not stupid for hating that it happened.Â
âIâm here every Monday, Thursday, Saturday and Sunday,â heâd said when you made up a lie about needing to leave, scared of overstaying, âseven âtil three, but you can ask for me if you ever want to. Sirius usually knows where I am.âÂ
And you had wanted to, but you knew you couldnât. Being so desperately alone that you craved the comfort of a strangerâs hand is fine, but it didnât feel okay to hold him hostage like that. Of course he feels sorry for you, of course he wants to make you feel better, how heartless would he look otherwise?
Youâd chide yourself for thinking cynically about someone whoâd only ever been nice if it would make a difference. Lonely, wrecked, you end up at the Community Support Group at the local leisure centre, wavering behind the swing doors.Â
A face appears on the other side of the door. Deep skin, eyes like cherry pits and lips painted a cheery red, a woman smiles at you and pulls it open.Â
âHi! Are you here for the support group?âÂ
âUhâ Yehââ You swallow roughly. âYes. Is that here?âÂ
âThatâs here.â She puts a thumb through the belt loop on her jeans. âWhy donât you come inside?âÂ
You take a tentative step.
âIâm Mary,â she says.Â
âI donât have to sign anything, right?â you ask.Â
Mary leads you into the room without stopping. âThis is off the books only. Do you want some tea or coffee?âÂ
âI canât have caffeine.âÂ
âDecaf?âÂ
âCan I have water?âÂ
Mary has a good smile. Like she knows you, like youâre already friends. She cups your shoulder and guides you to the refreshment table, an impressive splendor of coffee, tea, individually wrapped biscuits, and sandwiches. Thereâs a box of protein bars with a handwritten red felt note that says: Take me home if you want to!Â
âArenât hungry are you?â Mary asks.Â
âNot really.âÂ
She ducks down at the table and pushes aside tablecloth to grab a crate of water from underneath.
âYou havenât been here before, then?â Mary asks as she stands. âI remember most faces, I donât think Iâve seen you here.âÂ
âNo, Iâve never⊠um, someone at the pharmacy told me I can come,â you say tightly.Â
âOh, you can! Of course you can. I wondered if you were new, thatâs all.â She presses a bottle of water into your hands. You look down at her fingers, confused at their odd texture, your neck snapping up once you realise what youâre doing.
Mary has scars all over her hands, her wrists, and youâd been gawking at them by mistake. âSorry,â you mumble.Â
âFor what? Do you want me to stay? Or would you rather be by yourself?âÂ
âWe donât sit in a circle, do we?âÂ
Mary laughs lightly. âNo, no circle yet, you can leave if you donât wanna stay for the group talking therapy. For the first hour people just say hello to one another. There are a ton of counsellors here, okay? Iâm just gonna wander, but if you want to talk to me, come and find me, yeah?âÂ
âOkay, thanks. Thank you.âÂ
âYouâre welcome, hun.â She smiles at you, a little softer than before. âYou can sit down if it makes you feel less awkward, but be warned, the sofas are Jamesâ territory. He loves to talk.âÂ
Donât wanna get stuck with James, you think. Though really, youâre here to talk. Or to turn around and go home with a pocket full of protein bars.Â
The community room is an emptied dance hall thatâs been made nice. There are big boards of fliers, of last yearâs trampolining club, and another of the Community Support Christmas club, whatever that had been. It looked busier then than it does tonight âthere are a ton of sunny looking counsellors dotted around the room and talking in triangles, half as many people like you.Â
Someone random catches your eyes and you fluster, making your way to the terracotta sofas in the corner of the room on impulse. A man sits with an arm across his eyes, glasses on his chest, looking so sorrily tired for a second that you forget youâd come looking for help of your own.Â
âAre you okay?â you ask, stilted. Jamesâ territory, and youâd walked straight in.Â
The man sits up starkly. He looks right at you, but you donât recognise him until he puts on his glasses. Itâs one of those pharmacy men.Â
No, itâs not, youâd just seen him outside.Â
âHello,â he says, sliding his glasses up a strong-bridged nose. âIâm okay, Iâm just resting my eyes,â âhe laughsâ âyou alright?â You nod. âYeah? Here for the support club? Or the sandwiches?âÂ
âIââ Will you stammer every time someone asks you about it? âOne of theâ the pharmacy, one of the pharmacists told me to come.âÂ
âThatâs good,â he says earnestly. âI like those guys. Did you want a sandwich or something? I mustâve made a hundred. My hand still aches from the butter knife.âÂ
âIâm okay.âÂ
âOkay. Well, did you want to sit down? I promise I wonât hold you hostage or anything.âÂ
What am I doing? you think miserably, taking a seat in the sofa adjacent to his.Â
He crosses one leg over the other. âPlease donât look so upset. I swear I genuinely wonât make you talk. Iâm just here for the biscuits and lovely Lily, I promise. And lovelier Remusââ He laughs to himself.Â
âYouâre James?â you ask.Â
âThe last time I checked.â
âRemusâ he mentioned youâd be here. I forgot.âÂ
James only smiles. âHeâs brilliant, isnât he?â he asks, wriggling in his seat to procure one of those biscuit packets from his back pocket.Â
âHe said that I might like talking to Lily.âÂ
It feels weird calling her by her first name without knowing her, but James agrees, âIâll introduce you when she gets here, if thatâs what you want.âÂ
âI just⊠I donât know.âÂ
âSheâs just as nice as Remus is. Remus was nice to you, wasnât he?âÂ
You nod and look down at your clenched hands. âYeah. He was nice to me.âÂ
âThatâs good.âÂ
A tepid silence pervades for a moment.Â
âDo you want a biscuit or something? Or we have noodles and soup and stuff in the storage room, Iâm happy to make you something warm if you want that.âÂ
âYou guys are like a restaurant,â you say, still not willing to look at him.Â
âItâs nice to have options.âÂ
You nod hurriedly, sick to your stomach all over again. Options. Decisions.Â
Somewhere in the room, they turn on a radio. Shoes squeak on the waxed floor, a boy laughs like heâs being tickled. It was a mistake to come tonight. You desperately want someone to hug you and you know itâs too much to ask for, staggering to your feet with a headrush to be blinked back.Â
âYou okay?â James asks.
âYeah. Um, whereâs the toilet?âÂ
âBack out of the double doors, theyâre right in front of you, okay? Straight in front and then to the left, you canât miss them.âÂ
âOkay.â
âWait, Y/N?â he says.Â
You shoot him a look that betrays your surprise.Â
âSorry, Remus told me to keep a look out for you. I just wanted to say, I know this is different, and itâs weird, I get that, and I have no idea why youâre here tonight, but I promised Remus I wouldnât upset you, and I think I already have.â
âHe didnât tell you why Iâm here?âÂ
âOf course not.â James blows a breath that makes his hair fly away from his face in a wave. âItâs none of my business why youâre here. My job is to make sandwiches. I mean, some people come here just for the sandwiches or the warm room, and thatâs fine.âÂ
âThe sandwiches are that good?â you ask.Â
âTheyâre great. We donât fuck around, I use the real salted butter in the foil wrappings and the thick bread and everything. Proper ham, not the wafer thin stuff. And thereâs veggie bacon too, if you donât eat meat. I donât know, could you please just let me feed you something? Remus wonât forgive me if you came here and you didnât even eat.âÂ
âI think youâre using Remus as a ploy,â you say quietly.Â
âI am! So letâs go have a sandwich or a biscuit or something.â He waves his biscuits at you. âTheyâre Borderâs. Butterscotch Borderâs, you literally canât ask for better.âÂ
Just try. Be brave for a bit. âI like the uhâ the lemon ones.âÂ
James shoots up onto his feet, grinning. âAmazing taste. Letâs go find you some.âÂ
â
James takes you to the refreshment table. He finds you lemon drizzle biscuits, two packets, and he pushes two more into your hands with the command to take them home. He offers to make you dinner again when Lily arrives in a tizzy, with a chubby baby on her hip.Â
Harry, she says. Just turned three. Scandalised everyone at home, Lilyâs sister kicked her out, disaster. Harry, though, is beautiful. James and Lily are beautiful, and happy. James takes Harry into his arms the moment he sees him murmuring about his boy, and the sensation of guilt under your skin grows worse than ever.Â
How are you liking group? Lily asks. Would you come back next week? Thatâs great! Iâm so glad to hear it.Â
â
Youâre walking through Wilmand Street to the corner shop a few days later when you see him. Brown hair wet with snow, ashing a cigarette into the brick wall by the library. Remus cringes as he does it, blowing smoke from the side of his mouth in a call, âY/N!â he says, âHey, lovely, how are you? Sorry about the smoke,â he adds. âI was hoping Iâd see you this week.âÂ
âYeah?âÂ
âI wondered how you were doing.âÂ
âWell, donât worry about me, Iâm okay. IâŠâ You cringe, pulling a hand down your sore chest. âI owe you an apology. Iâm sorry for the other day, for dumping that stuff on you, you donât even know me and I told you such a horrible thing and made you worry, and your friends were so nice to me at the community group and I just didnât say thanks or anything. Iâm genuinely ashamed of myself.â You smile a weird smile, clunky, attempting to brush everything away like it didnât mean anything, silly little you. âAll the time.âÂ
Remusâ expression goes odd, a wall you canât read, left searching his winter jacket for clues as to how heâs feeling. âI donât think you have anything to be ashamed of,â he says, finally and simply.Â
âIt was rude of me.âÂ
âI have some experience with feeling ashamed for the things other people have done,â he says, flakes of snow kissing his shoulders, a white dot coming to rest and melt on his cheek. âI understand why youâre feeling this way, and itâs expected, but⊠How do I put this?âÂ
You watch his eyes. Remus struggles to say anything more. Itâs the first time youâve ever seen a flicker of insecurity on him. He always seems calmly settled, as though heâs thought about the world and found what it is he was looking for in it a long time ago.Â
âJust because we think something doesnât make it true,â he says, hiding his hands in his coat pockets. âYou might feel like it was wrong to tell me, but it wasnât, and you might think you were rude to my friends, but you werenât. They didnât have a single bad word to say about you. Not that either of them tend to say anything disparaging about anyone,â he adds as an afterthought.Â
âI wish I didnât tell you, is all.âÂ
âIâm sorry. I can go on as though you didnât, if thatâs what you want, whatever you want.âÂ
You look down at your chest, nodding. âOkay.âÂ
Which isnât a yes or no to his suggestion, but he doesnât pull you up on it. âOkay. Are you going to the pharmacy?âÂ
âIâ no. But I did hope to ask you something.â He nods, as if to say, Go on. âItâs about the sex clinic.âÂ
âWhat about it?âÂ
âI donât really know what it is.âÂ
Remus looks around the street and then up and down your arms. The jumper youâre wearing is thin, your teeth aching to chatter, and heâs noticed it already. âDo you want to have this conversation over tea, lovely?â he asks.Â
âDecaf?âÂ
âYes, and biscuits, if youâre interested.âÂ
You follow Remus up the marginally steep hill that makes up Wilmand Street and enter the pharmacy behind him. Itâs wooden front and newspaper clippings give way to the starker insides, where you find Sirius sitting at the front desk. Or rather, sitting on it, corded telephone held between his ear and his shoulder. âOh, heâs just come in, but he has company. Yeah, he said.â Sirius presses the phone to his shoulder to give you both a small but earnest smile. âHey, youâve been snowed on. Turn the heating up before you catch your death.âÂ
âItâs been caught,â Remus says with a wave. âWeâre going to sit in the kitchen. Tell Reg not to interrupt us.âÂ
Your mouth falls open, but Sirius only salutes his âfriend? coworker? âJames says heâs giving the phone a sloppy one for you.âÂ
âLovely.â Remus laughs brightly, his hand slipping behind your shoulder. âAlright?â he asks.Â
You give a nod and continue following him past the inside door to the kitchen youâd sat in before. Remus flicks the kettle on and sits down, forcing you to take his cue and sit opposite of him.Â
âMuch warmer in here,â he mumbles, stripping out of his coat. âAlright. What did you want to ask me about the sex clinic?âÂ
âUm⊠I donât know. How do I go there?âÂ
âWeâll make an appointment. Itâs not far from the leisure centre, so you can walk, or I can book you a taxi, give you a lift. We'll work something out.â
âAnd they⊠wonât mind that Iâ that I donât really know what Iâm doing?âÂ
You almost miss the dissatisfied noise he makes over the rising sound of the kettle. âThey wonât mind.âÂ
âDo I have to tell them what happened?âÂ
âNo. I mean, I assume itâs better if they have a clearer picture of the circumstances, but then again, youâre entitled to your privacy. You could just say youâre concerned about your intimate health.âÂ
âBut theyâll ask questions.âÂ
âYeah, they will. I know you donât want to answer them, and thatâs okay. You donât have to answer them. Doctorâs, pharmacists, we just ask about stuff because we have to, but thereâs no law that says you have to answer.âÂ
Now youâve had time to think about things beyond the aching and the angry horror, a new fear has curdled. âWhat if he gave me something?â you say under your breath.Â
âThen we can get you whatever medicine it is that you need and we can work toward you feeling better again.â His head tips as the kettle clicks. âDid you still want tea?âÂ
âYes, please.âÂ
Remus makes you each a cup of decaf tea, bringing sugar and milk to the table for you to add yourself.Â
âWe can go now, if you want to.âÂ
âTo the clinic?â you ask.Â
Remus nods slowly. âMm-hm. Itâs an emergency.âÂ
âYouâd come with me?â you ask, not breathless, but almost.Â
âIf youâre okay with it and you want me to, Iâll come with you. It might not be so scary. Or I can ask Lily to take you.âÂ
Itâs not Remusâ fault that the person who assaulted you was a man like he is, but it does sound less intimidating to go with a girl. Youâre not sure why. Itâs not like he hasnât been kind since the minute you asked him about confidentiality or that he deserves your distrust, but even sitting in this room with him now talking about the clinic has made you uncomfortable again. âWould she mind?âÂ
âLily would love to take you. I know that sounds strange. She wouldnât love that you need to go, but she wouldnât want you to go alone if youâre worried about it.âÂ
âAnd sheâll go now?âÂ
Remus pushes your mug toward you. âYou have some tea and I'll go and ask James if sheâs around.â
âI donât want to be a burden.âÂ
âYouâre not,â he says. âThereâs biscuits in the cupboard, lovely. If you want some, you can help yourself.âÂ
Things donât pass that day in much detail after that. When Remus returns ten minutes later, youâve finished your tea, and Lily is with him. She was on her way here already. Sheâd be happy to take you to the clinic.Â
So you go, and you get checked out, and you submit to their tests and their invasive, well-intentioned questions. Lily takes you to a cafe afterward and buys you a pastry you canât do more than poke. She takes you home. You feel guilty for not saying thank you in the car, but you can barely speak. A few days later you get a phone call with your results. You take a course of medications. You cry yourself to sleep three days in a row, because, as theyâd tested for STDs, they tested for something else, and theyâd told you what youâd already known.Â
Youâre as pregnant as your home tests said you are. Despite everything, you feel an emotion you hate, and you push it down again.Â
â
The door to your flat shakes with a sharp knock.Â
You startle and stand, not sure what youâd been thinking, a hole burned into the floor at your feet. Youâre in no state to answer the door, wet hair dripping a river down your back and your pajamas old. Thereâs nothing for it.Â
You take the handle into your hand and squeeze.Â
Dark-haired Regulus is standing in the hallway. You let the door close just an inch between you.Â
âRegulus,â you say, unsure if surprise will help or hinder you.Â
âHello.âÂ
âHow can IâŠâÂ
âRemus asked me to check in on you.âÂ
Youâre not sure you like what heâs saying. âHow do you know where I live?âÂ
âRemus didnât ask me to come to your flat, if thatâs what youâre asking.âÂ
âNo, itâs not. Iâm confused that you know where I live when I didnât tell you.âÂ
He holds a deft hand up in surrender. âI live across the street, Iâve seen you come into the building, and your last name is on the postbox downstairs. Iâm not doing anything illegal.âÂ
Just weird, then.Â
âRemus asked me to keep an eye out for you,â he says, âbut you havenât been to the pharmacy, naturally.â
âSo your solution was to come to my house?âÂ
âI donât think thereâs any need to get twitchy.âÂ
But there is. There is. He might not know what it is, and you might find thinking about it feels like a serrated blade end squeezed in your fist, but there is a need. You donât want him to be here. It doesnât matter that heâs small and skinny and has a sweet nose. This is your place to be by yourself, and to have nobody know where you are. This is the locked door.Â
He has the sense to soften his bravado. âSorry. Iâve made you uncomfortable.âÂ
You try to relax your shoulders. Your ribs ache with the tension. âPlease,â you say gently, âtell Remus that Iâm alright. Thank you for worrying about me.â
Regulus looks to the stairwell leading to the foyer. âHeâs going to Community Support tonight if you want to tell him yourself. I am, too.â He doesnât look at you again. âSee you later,â he says to the stairs.Â
 â
You go to Community Support despite yourself.
âCan you forgive me for not flirting with you?âÂ
You surprise the urge to flinch hard, turning to the voice with a half-smile. Sirius is standing beside you suddenly, your faces reflected in the plexiglass covered notice board just outside of the community hall. âWhat?â you ask.Â
âI donât mean to be offensive. I havenât flirted because I thought Remus might have his eye on you, and I donât want you to think itâs because youâre not beautiful.âÂ
You have to turn to see him to realise heâs teasing you now to be friendly. âIâd be offended if you did flirt with me,â you say.Â
âMarvellous, then I wonât.â
âRemus doesnât have his eye on me, though. Heâs just been giving me pharmaceutical advice, I suppose.âÂ
âOh, I see. I thought maybe youâd⊠Well, never mind. Forget I said anything.â
Heâs handsome enough that youâd be shocked if he actually did flirt with you, clear-skinned as his brother, but with a warmer smile, almost mischievous, like he knows something you donât know and heâll tell you for the right price. His shoulders are slim, his biceps particularly solid as he crosses his arms over his chest. He notices you noticing and gives a flex, to your laughter. âLike what you see?â he asks.Â
âSorry.âÂ
âWeâre on the rugby team, you know.â
âYou and Remus?âÂ
âAs if, Remus doesnât like sports. Heâs more of a walker. James and I are the sportsmen.âÂ
Sirius didnât strike you as somebody who plays anything either, but itâs not polite to say.Â
âWell, arenât you coming inside?â he asks. âWe could use a face like yours in there tonight. Beautiful girls are great for overall morale.âÂ
You shake your head. âDonât think so.âÂ
âYou came all the way here. You could at least come in for a bit of cake or something.âÂ
âCommunity support or community kitchen?â you mumble.Â
âEverybody gets hungry. The best part of being in a community is making sure nobody goes hungry for long, right?âÂ
You give him a sideways look. Somehow, someway, youâve become acquainted with a circle of philanthropists. Normal people arenât so generous. Youâre too tired to be this kind.Â
âWhat kind do you have?âÂ
âCarrot, red velvet, Victoria sponge, and plain chocolate, I think. Maybe a bit of walnut sponge if Marlene hasnât mauled the whole thing.âÂ
Youâre not sure you can stomach it, just heâs looking at you so nicely that you want to go in with him. âOkay.âÂ
âOkay?â he asks.Â
âYeah.âÂ
Sirius slips a hand behind your back, letting it hover an inch from your skin as he shepherds you through the double doors and into the main hall. Itâs far more crowded than it had been on your first visit, a small circle of people already in chairs talking a ways from the crowded food table, pilfered, more sandwiches in hands than hands to hold them, and enough brewed coffee to scent the air. James is immediately noticeable crouching at the table, having pulled a crate of juice boxes from beneath it, laughing about something someone is saying to him âsomething Remus is saying, the tallest man in the room and somehow completely non-imposing, his voice more colour than sound as he talks.Â
It must just be because Remus is attentive. Must be the memory of his nice hand on your shoulder, squeezing, that makes you pay special attention to his shaking. âIs he laughing?â you ask.Â
Sirius tunes in quickly. âYeah. Heâs done that since we were kids. He can laugh like normal, but when something really has him itâs like he canât get the sound out.â He chuckles himself. âIdiots. Come on, letâs get you your slice of cake.âÂ
You canât help staring at Remus as Sirius takes you over to him and James. James is so happy to see you he almost loses his glasses.Â
âYouâre back! I thought my shitty impersonation of a counsellor mightâve scared you off. Donât want some soup, do you?âÂ
âDonât say yes out of pity,â Sirius says. âNobody ever wants James to make them soup.âÂ
âYou like my soup.âÂ
âI like Effieâs soup. She makes the best bowl of lemon chicken Iâve ever tasted, and you make a mediocre imitation of her recipe, which is as good as it gets while Iâm away.âÂ
âEffieâs my mother,â James explains, clambering to his feet with the crate of small bottles of juice held to his chest. âEuphemia. And she does make the best lemon chicken soup, but mines just fine! And anyways, tonight I made winter vegetable because all the Christmas veg was 8p and I have a fuckton. Itâs delicious. I cut the swede up so thin it melts in your mouth, I got fresh thyme from the garden, little bit of spinach, all of it cooked in a metric ton of butter.âÂ
Remus snorts softly. He meets your eyes, which has you smiling on automatic. âJames is a bit of a soup addict.âÂ
âIââ You feel hungry for the first time in weeks. âIâd quite like to, uh, try some. If you really donât mind.âÂ
James glows, shoving the case of juice onto the refreshment table next to the hot water towers. âYes. How about toasties, lovely, dâyou want a cheese toastie with it? Youâll love it.â He doesnât wait for an answer. âAnyone else while Iâm warming it?âÂ
Remus meets your eyes again, like youâre sharing a secret. âIâll have a bowl, Jamie.âÂ
âYes.âÂ
âAlright,â Sirius acquiesces, âand me. And Reg will, too, wherever heâs gone off too. But he wonât have cheeseââ
âJust toast, I know.âÂ
James gets a look on him like heâs found the secrets of the universe. âIâll make a garlic butter cheese toastie for all of you. Mm?âÂ
Sirius waves him away.Â
Sirius grabs you a slice of cake even as you mumble about the soup and how itâs dessert before dinner. Doesnât matter, he murmurs back, not worried about why youâve gone shy, I promised you a slice.
You take an apple juice and follow him to a table. Remus comes with you. He looks sunnier today than the last time you saw him despite ever-cloudy weather. Maybe heâs just a bit golden. Steady, he sits at the table across from you with Sirius taking a seat perpendicular, the three of you three sides to a square, nothing to look at besides your hand squeezed around the handle of a plastic fork.Â
âIâm sorry about Regulus,â Remus says. âI didnât mean for him to visit you at home. He told me you werenât thrilled about it, and I canât blame you.âÂ
âIâm sorry too,â Sirius says, wrinkling his nose. âI have no clue why he did that.âÂ
âAnd Regulus would be sorry, he just has a hard time realising when heâs overstepped.â
You nod at the table. âItâs okay. I mean, it did make me uncomfortable, and Iâ wasnât super polite to him. I just wasnât expecting him to be at the door, thatâs all. And he said sorry, actually. So itâs forgiven.âÂ
âOh.â Sirius perches his hand in his head. âThatâs unlike him. He doesnât tend to be sorry.âÂ
âNeither do you,â Remus says.Â
âItâs a family trait.âÂ
âCan I save this for after soup?â you ask, shuffling your plate to the side. Itâll be easier to eat your cake when everyone else is eating as well.Â
âCourse you can,â Sirius says, leaning back in his seat. âBut if you donât eat it, Iâll assume you donât like me. Iâm sensitive like that.âÂ
Remus rolls his eyes, again gifting you with a great feeling, as though youâre in on a secret with him. Heâs wearing an aviator jacket that looks incredibly soft, worn but not tattered, sherpa insides flattened but clean. The sleeves warp as he crosses his arms in front of him on the table and leans forward, conspirator.Â
âSo, how was your morning? Besides Regulusâ unwelcome intrusion,â he says, almost drawling as Sirius does when he gets that playful look in his eye.Â
Youâre not sure how to handle these boys. But you want to try. Youâre sick of having nobody, of being nobody, even if itâs a little discomfiting sometimes to be with them. âMy morning was fine. Tries to get through all my washing but itâs a mountain, so I left it and had a long shower instead.â
âHow long is long?â Remus asks.Â
âToo long.âÂ
âLike Remusâ, then. Iâm a one and done man, wash and go.â Sirius peels forward, âAnd Remus takes hours. Uses all the hot water.âÂ
âYou live together?â you ask.Â
âWe did for a bit, didnât we?â Sirius says.Â
âSix very long years,â Remus says. âBut I have a flat, and Sirius lives on Wilmand Street now, thank god.âÂ
âThank god indeed,â Sirius says, ânow I can actually wash my hair on a semi-regular basis.âÂ
âCan you?â Remus asks.Â
âWhat are you implying?âÂ
âOnly that your hair seems distinctly unwashed lately, donât worry.âÂ
âHeâs showing off âcos youâre here,â Sirius says, smiling despite the accusation as he takes a hand through his hair and pushes it back from his face. âI wash plenty.âÂ
âDo you? I was almost hoping youâd stopped. Maybe that would explain the weird thing you have going on right here.â Remus scratches his upper lip.Â
âFuck off, you just donât like a scratchy kissââ
Remus laughs suddenly. After a moment, it tapers into silence, though his shoulders still shake, and you can hear his laughter in his voice when he says, âThat charming thatch of stubble would be the last of my worries if I wanted to kiss you, Sirius.âÂ
âWhatâs top of the list then?âÂ
âThe smell, obviously. Iâm getting top notes of wet dog and a headier dampnessââ
âYou sick bastard,â Sirius says, sounding absolutely delighted at his friend's insult.Â
âYou just need a good wash, is all.âÂ
You donât mean to, but you laugh. Giggle, really, entertained by them and shocked a little by the way they snip and snap at each other. You pitch forward, face angled down, eyes tempted to shut completely. Sick bastard, you think, laughing still.Â
It only makes you laugh more when Sirius nudges you. âHey, thought we were getting somewhere,â he murmurs.Â
You giggle some more. âSorry,â you squeeze out eventually.Â
âDonât be. He can take a hit. Even if heâs sensitive,â Remus says.
Sirius sniffs. âIâm not that sensitive. Canât make a joke anymore without being entirely misrepresented.âÂ
âÂ
Jamesâ soup becomes a staple for you over the next couple of days. Community Support is a daily occurrence, though some nights are more popular than others. The weekends are busiest, Friday and Saturday night, but Wednesdays have an uptick you arenât expecting, sitting at one of the plastic tables with another cup or winter veg soup and a garlic buttered toastie. You blow on melty cheese as James brings the hot plate out to the refreshment table, making it easier to serve the many who want it. Heâs gleeful, promising that theyâre gonna love it, and then tacking on an amendment that anyone who doesnât like it is more than welcome to something else from the kitchen.Â
With payday for most at midnight Friday, or some time after, itâs the hump of the week that hits hardest. You donât come for the soup, but some people do, and they canât be blamed for it; stretching money out isnât easy.Â
Your stomach clenches. Your spoon wobbles in your hand.Â
From across the room, Remus sends you a warm smile, a kid in his arms and another at his thigh, chattering away as their mam takes a well-deserved breather by the terracotta sofas.Â
The next day is the same. James makes soup and ham sandwiches, ham off the bone, made it himself, and you pick at the crusts at a plastic table. Sirius keeps you company for a bit, and then Remus rags on him until he leaves. Theyâre both too smiley to believe any animosity.Â
On Friday, James isnât there.Â
âHarryâs poorly.âÂ
âI thought he mightâve had a day off.âÂ
âHe and Lily like the group too much for days off.â Remus scratches a hand through his hair. Itâs the most boyish thing heâs ever done in front of you. âAre you liking it here? You havenât missed a day all week.âÂ
âJames makes a good soup.âÂ
âHe left plenty, if you want it.âÂ
Youâre not sure you can stomach it. You give a small shake of your head. âWill Harry be okay?âÂ
âFine. He gets ear infections, James used to get them too, even when we were teenagers. Heâs on antibiotics already, itâs just the crying thatâs the worst. Makes him sick.â Remus smiles sympathetically. âMakes James sick, too. But theyâll be okay.âÂ
âThatâs good. Itâs too quiet here when James isnât around.âÂ
The hall is practically silent. There are a few people milling around on the sofas and another handful drinking tea by the refreshment table. Mary is patting a crying woman with pink hair on the back. A two year old sits at her feet, staring up at her sullenly.Â
âI could go turn on the radio.âÂ
You perch your chin in your palm, elbow on the table. Tired today. âThatâs okay. Itâs nice.â Quiet, but not lonely.Â
âYou feeling okay?â he asks.Â
âYeah.â You fight the urge to let your eyes shutter closed. âIâm okay. You okay?âÂ
âIâm great. Iâm really glad youâve been coming. I know you donât stay for group therapy, and you donât have to, but⊠I donât know, I think itâs just good to be around people.âÂ
You feel like he meant to say a particular but dodged it at the last second. He hesitated.Â
He said he wouldnât bring it up if you didnât want him to, but maybe you do, just so you know it was real, and bad. It was awful, wasnât it?Â
âI donât like being alone,â you confess, scratching the back of your neck. âFor a whileâŠâ You scratch scratch scratch, sounds of your nails over skin, then let your hand drop with a thump against your thigh. âI wanted to be alone. But now when Iâm home by myself I feel awful.âÂ
âItâs normal to want company.âÂ
âEven after what happened?âÂ
âEspecially after what happened. I think the stereotype is that people⊠experience something bad, and that they retreat into themselves, and thatâs based on a real process of emotions,â âhe talks quietly but surely, without a lick of condescensionâ âand a real sort of phenomena. Everybody needs time to lick their wounds, to put it heavily. But it makes sense that youâd seek out company when youâve just had a really, really horrible thing happen.âÂ
You did retreat into yourself at first. Wasting days away in bed without an appetite, crying yourself sick and to sleep, hating yourself and the world and him, because it hurt so badly. But then you didnât get your period when you were expecting it and it was like holding the times of a fork to a plug socket, a nasty shock flaring through your entire body from the tips of your fingers. And now you have decisions to make and a life to live after, itâs happening now, quickly. You arenât feeling any better than you were that morning when you first woke up and realised youâd been attacked without fully knowing, but time is moving forward regardless. You donât know why you crave other people, but you do. You like seeing Remus every night, even if he only talks to you once or twice. You like eating Jamesâ home cooked food, like watching Sirius and Regulus bicker as they lean against one another, and you like seeing Lily press her nose to her babyâs. You wonder what that feels like. How soft is a small nose? What does it feel like to hold the person you made out of love and a little bit of every part of you in two hands?Â
Youâre still so lonely itâs palpable. There are moments throughout the day where you canât face it head on, but the support group is genuinely helping, if itâs just to spend an hour outside of your head.Â
Lonely, and with nobody to confide in.Â
Remus watches you think for a while. Heâs waiting patiently for you to speak again.Â
âCan I tell you something stupid?â you ask softly.Â
âSure.âÂ
âDonât laugh at me.âÂ
âI doubt I could.âÂ
You let out a deep sigh. Heâs all browns tonight in his old jacket. Brown hair, brown eyes, brown jacket. âI was thinking about keeping the baby. I donât know if youâd consider it a baby right now,â you murmur, staring at the corner of his mouth, âbut I think I want it to be one. And I canât stop thinking that itâs a bad idea.âÂ
âItâs your decision,â Remus says. When you sigh, he looks chastened, and you hadnât wanted it to be a chastening. He clears his throat. âYou already know that, donât you?â Not expecting an answer, he leans back in his chair and levels you with a smile more friendly than you deserve. âKeep your baby if you want to, lovely. The point ofâ Well, of having the choice, is being allowed to choose yes, to choose to keep your baby, even if itâs a bad idea. Or looks like one.â
âI know, butâŠâÂ
But itâs a bad idea. But it happened because somebody hurt you. But youâre completely alone.
âIâm not upsetting you, am I?â he asks.Â
âNo, youâre not. Youâve been really nice to me,â you mumble, letting your aching eyes close as you lean into your hand. âItâs not you.âÂ
Remus settles for a few seconds. âCan I put my arm around you?â he asks finally.Â
âOkay.âÂ
So he does. His voice drops to match your own, his elbow right between your ribs as his thumb skirts across the top of your shoulder, âIâm sorry I canât fix it for you, I wish I could tell you what to do thatâs going to make you the happiest. I canât, though.â
âI know.âÂ
He rubs your shoulder. âI know you know.âÂ
Thereâs a lot to think about. You arenât pregnant by a miracle. Something bad happened to you, and the choice is yours now to take, and no one would blame you for wanting to forget the whole thing. At least, nobody here at the support group would. Itâs not like you havenât thought about it; lately, itâs the only thing on your mind. But the guilt of wanting it wonât go away.Â
âSorry you have to do this again,â you mumble.Â
âWhat, give you a hug?â Remusâ voice turns softer. It feels less like the kind words of a stranger and more like a friend. âI donât mind it.âÂ
You try to stop feeling guilty. The most you can be right now is looked after, at least for a while, for as long as Remus will hold your shoulders.Â
âItâs not your fault,â Remus says. âYou know that, too, Iâm guessing. What happened to you wasnât your fault.âÂ
Youâre not so sure. Itâs a different guilt to look at in whatever light finds you when it happens. âI know,â you say, half a lie.Â
âAnd I know you have no reason to trust us with something so huge, but weâre here for you. Thatâs the whole point of the group.âÂ
You sigh heavily. âI know,â you say under your breath. Youâre just not sure itâs going to be enough.
đŠč
hi thanks for reading the first part! this is a heavy one but itâs also a fic Iâve wanted to write for a long time, or rewrite <\3 some of you may have read my first go at this years ago and Iâm hoping to tie in some of the old stuff but itâs also its own story hopefully, itâs shaping up well!Â
https://rapecrisis.org.uk rape crisis UK â they have a support line! and many many articles
information about rape crisis https://247sexualabusesupport.org.uk/faqs/
#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x fem!reader#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#marauders era#remus x reader#remus x you#marauders#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin blurb#marauders x reader#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fanfiction#the marauders
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would you be up to do bff remus with no boundaries?? i think that would be an interesting dynamic
maybe like after a full moon and she just like fully gives him a shower, or something where heâs just completely naked and the boys are so confused at whatâs happening
"Arm up, Rem," You hum, but your fingers pry at his pale, scarred skin before he can even begin moving a muscle.
You lift his bicep away from his side, bringing the lathered loofa in your hand to swipe through the curve of his armpit. Suds slide down his sides and you hear him hiss as they mingle with his still-healing cuts and scrapes, but there's nothing to be done except cleaning them before they can be dressed.
"Easy, easy," You rub a hand over his back in a soothing circle that carefully avoids his injuries, "Just gotta get 'em clean, then we can dress them. You can sleep on your stomach, that'll help the ones on your back. How'd you even get scratches on your back?"
"It's all the ladies I occupy my time with," Remus drawls, but his pain is evident in the weakness of his voice, "Women love werewolves."
When you don't answer, leaving an purposefully awkward silence behind that swirls with the steam from the shower, Remus sighs, "Got all scratched up from the tree branches out there."
You drag the loofa from his side to his back, carefully ghosting over the caked dirt around his wounds. His knuckles turn white as he clenches his fists, but when he tries drawing one into his mouth to bite at it you take it in your own free hand.
"No biting. That's reserved for your better half."
"Are you talking about Sirius, or the wolf? Sirius bites me," Remus grumbles, and- speak of the devil, there's feet pounding obnoxiously up the stairs and towards the dorms.
"Moony, we've got all the chocolate we could carry," Sirius informs him, and there's the sound of wrapped goods being piled on Remus's comforter before James and Sirius step into the doorway of the bathroom.
James lets out an 'ooh' and turns away with a grimace when he sees you kneeled beside Remus's naked form beneath the spray of water, but Sirius stands stock-still, frozen by some mix of intrigue and horror.
"Uh, are we interrupting something?"
"Just a bath," You smile kindly at them, scrubbing gently at Remus's neck, "He has trouble getting his back sometimes."
"Sometimes- have you two done this before?"
"After every moon." You nod helpfully when Remus merely ducks his head to rest between his knees, "You two are usually either asleep or trying to get grass out of your pelts."
There's something green in Sirius's hair that proves the two were unsuccessful this time around.
"Oh. I'm sorry, Moony, I didn't know you had a caregiver," Sirius snickers, "Does she help you put your panties on too?"
"Don't let him get to you, dove," Remus murmurs, his eyes slipping shut as the warm water seeps into his skin and heals an ancient ache in his bones, "He's just mad he'll never get to take yours off. They're a real pretty pattern, y'know," Remus glances up at Sirius with the ghost of a smirk on his face, muffled by pain but persistent all the same, "Shame she's not interested in showing 'em to you."
"You've seen her panties, mate?" James cuts in, peering over Sirius's shoulder, "What are you two?"
"Friends," You shrug, "But it's stuffy in here at night, and my sleeping pants get too warm."
"You're telling me all the times you two have slept over in here all snuggled up in his bed, that you've not had any pants on?"
"Well I don't make it a habit to strip in his bed," You scoff, scrubbing at a particularly stubborn grass stain on the pale plane of his hip, "But I can promise you that my pants are never gonna be on your floor, either one of you."
"Oh please, we wouldn't dream of stealing Moony's girl," Sirius claps James on the shoulder, "But whaddya think about that, mate? Strippin' down to cuddle in bed together? They seem to think it's a friendly endeavor."
"I typically only ditch my pants for Lily, Padfoot," James informs Sirius with a sympathetic smile, "But I'll ask her if I can bring my dog to her dorm tomorrow night. You can sleep at our feet."
Sirius begins valiantly arguing for a spot higher up on the bed, every dog's hardest battle to fight, but you're no longer interested in their antics or the noise they're producing. You reach out your foot to kick at the door, and it swings shut with a satisfying click.
"Thanks, love." Remus groans, his face squished between his knees, "They were givin' me a headache."
"They always give you a headache," You dig your thumbs into a tense spot on his back and he twitches beneath you with a hum of appreciation, "We should get a flat together without them. They can be the feral deer and dog that live outside our cottage."
"We'll have to call animal control" Remus grins wryly against the rounded bend of his knee as you lean forwards to wash beneath his thighs, "How strong are their strongest tranquilizer darts?"
#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin scenario#remus lupin oneshot#remus lupin one-shot#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin dialogue#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin headcanons#remus lupin headcanon#remus lupin hc#remus lupin hcs#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fic#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x you
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day 11 - medical kink/doctor x patient [r.lupin]
remus lupin x fem!reader
content warnings; dub/con, innocence, abuse of power (remus), so many pet names, vaginal fingering, p in v, basically âhysteriaâ, very unrealistic loss of virginity (next to no pain mentions, remus doesnât go slow etc), r thinks sheâs been wetting herself slightly but sheâs just horny and wet lol, age gap (r is 18, remusâ age is undisclosed but heâs a licensed doctor)
notes; (unintentionally) the longest fic iâve even written by far, oh my god my thumbs hurt. all likes, comments and reblogs much appreciated. as always mdni
part 2
kinktober/flufftober masterlist
âââââ
youâd been guided into the empty room at the doctors office by the bored receptionist, her muttering something about the doctor joining you soon, and to take a seat.
it had been a few minutes since then, you were sat carefully on one of the patients chairs, grasping nervously at the cross hanging between your breasts. the ticking of the clock only amplified your nerves, leg bouncing as you stared at the door, imaging all the ways this appointment could go wrong.
you jumped when the door opened, doctor lupin walked in, smiling widely as he shut and locked the door behind him.
âhello, itâs lovely to see you again, y/n,â he sat down at his chair, not taking his eyes off of you.
you nodded along, not trusting your voice just yet, nails now digging into your bare thighs, skirt shifting higher up your legs.
ânow, i was told that youâd been having some female problems, could you tell me more about that?â
avoiding eye contact, you chewed on you lip before attempting to explain your embarrassing situation, âi- um, iâve been having some- some weird feelings, yâknow uh, down there,â you mumbled.
âokay, how long has this been going on for, hm?â
âa few weeks, maybe. itâs- itâs on and off though, not all the time,â what you refused to mention, was that whenever you were experiencing these feelings, was when you were thinking about your hot new doctor.
âyeah? so around the time that i saw you last? why didnât you mention anything then, sweetheart? it seems to be bothering you an awful lot,â
oh my gosh, this was the most mortifying moment of your life. how on earth were you supposed to tell him that the weird sensations only started happening since you met him.
youâd had to change doctors after you moved house, still living at home with your parents, and had met dr lupin for a standard checkup. youâd instantly become a stuttering mess- much like you were now- at how attractive he was.
you werenât sure how to answer his question, cheeks flaming, and almost sighed in relief when he clearly pitied you enough to ask something different.
âdo you think you could describe what the weird feelings are like, honey? are they painful?â he asks, face twisted in concern.
âno they donât hurt, itâs like- tingly, i think. feels throbby and uncomfortable. it um-,â you shifted in your seat, eyes locked on your mary-jane clad feet.
âitâs okay, take your time,â
âit makes me pee a little, i keep having to change my- my underwear,â you eyes began to sting in humiliation, knowing that if your parents found out that youâd been wetting yourself at the age of 18, theyâd never speak to you again.
âsh, sh thereâs nothing to be embarrassed about. are you sure itâs pee? or is it thicker, maybe a clearish-white?â
âyeah, itâs just like that, and itâs sticky too,â
âi think i know the problem, y/n. itâs easily treated, but youâll need regular treatments with me to keep it contained, okay?â he wheeled his chair closer to his desk, typing something in his computer, nodding when you meekly said okay.
you were beyond relieved that you were going to be okay, that you wouldnât have to confess your sins to the priest and your parents, that you could be cured by your nice doctor.
âalright, i need you to fully undress, get into this gown and lay down on the bed for me, then we can start the first session,â he gave you no room for arguments, handing you a pale blue hospital gown and turning back to his computer.
you shuffled over to the bed, slowly undressing and blanching at the thought of him seeing you borderline naked. your family were very christian and at a young age you had promised to never ruin yourself, especially not before marriage. youâd never been allowed any boyfriends growing up, always heavily punished if youâd been caught even looking at a boy for too long.
youâd since learnt your lesson, only having girl friends, steering clear of anyone outside of the church and keeping your head down in public. the idea that dr lupin would be seeing you down there, was enough to bring you close to tears.
you peered over your shoulder periodically, nervous that heâd turn around and catch a peep of your bare skin.
slipping into the gown, you climbed onto the bed, laying back as you called out to him that you were ready.
you watched dr lupin set up, snapping on his gloves and sanitising various terrifying looking equipment on his metal table.
âjust need you to pop your feet in the stirrups, lovely girl,â
you carefully did as he said, legs spread wide and feeling oh so vulnerable, but terribly scared of disappointing him. you hated it, but a small part of you was loving the way his hands gripped your ankles when he strapped you in, murmuring reassurances about it being for everyoneâs safety, thumb stroking along your delicate skin.
eventually, he stood between your legs, blue gloved hands hovering above your private parts, âis it okay if i start? iâll need to touch you.â
you nodded your consent, breath hitching as he made contact with your very inner thigh, fingertips sliding closer to where the problem originated, his eyes never leaving the area.
âare you having those feelings now? youâre all wet, love,â
a tear finally slipped free, cooling your burning cheeks as you turned your head away, shame consuming you.
âoh baby, itâs okay, iâm gonna help you, you want me to make you feel better?â
you nodded, finally looking up at him with salty tears glittering in your pretty eyes, wanting nothing more than this horrible feeling to go away. you wanted dr lupin to make you all better.
his digits glide over your pussy, your warm slick coating them. you whimper when he hits your sensitive clit, legs twitching in response. the taste of iron coated your tongue, biting down as a pathetic effort to try and keep quiet, mindful of other patients in the waiting room just down the hall.
he slowly started circling it, free hand going to press at your throbbing hole, âfuck, you really arenât very well, are you poppet? sâalright, i have just the thing to make you feel good again, itâll fix you right up,â
you cried out when a finger entered you, tight walls spasming around the foreign object. sobbing and shaking, so overcome with pleasure with him working you up to your fast approaching orgasm. you let out a sharp gasp, confused as to what was happening to your body. you were losing control of your movements, and you began to worry that you were being possessed by a demon.
those thoughts were cleared from your mind when you came with a squeal, thighs closing around his hands in an effort to get the overwhelming pleasure to stop. you were astounded that something medical could feel so amazing, or even that it was possible to feel like this at all. you felt very lucky that you had such a good doctor, even if he made you feel flustered.
already, the feeling deep in your belly was starting to be satiated, but you really hoped that there would be more treatment today, as it still lingered and you desperately needed to feel that bliss again.
when he pulled his fingers away, he could see the white substance ringed around them, arousal fluid still connecting your heat to him in strings. his erection was pulsing against his trousers, dampening the fabric there as he tried to hold back from corrupting you too much.
oh well, too late now.
he whispered praises to you, rubbing your thighs and smearing your cum all over them as he tried to calm you down, smiling softly when you reopened your eyes.
âthat was intense, huh? you did so well for me, just need one more from you, then youâre all done for today. i know, itâs a lot, but itâs really important that we fully complete the treatment, especially seeing as you shook so much,â
you nodded hazily, head much too clouded in pleasure to be able to take in what he was saying. youâd never felt that good in your life, and you supposed that it was a good thing that youâd gone to the doctors first instead of the priest, feeling much better already.
still so caught up in your mind, you didnât pay any attention to what dr lupin was doing, not noticing him snapping off his gloves before unbuckling his belt and pulling out his reddened cock.
âthis piece of equipment is really gonna make a lot of difference in your recovery,â he said, rubbing his tip along your puffy entrance, groaning quietly when it caught, slipping inside slightly.
you moaned loudly when he finally pushed in, eyes rolling to the back of your head at the mixture of pleasure and pain.
dr lupin had to hold still for a moment, trying to hold back from giving you a creampie already at the sight of your virgin blood staining his cock, pearly white and crimson mixing to create a rosy pink that coated him.
checking that you were doing okay, he pulled out until only his tip was left inside of you. fingers grasping at your waist, hard enough that he knew it would leave plum coloured bruising, remus gave you no warning before he began to pound into you, letting out guttural groans as your back arched off the bed.
the clinical paper ripped beneath you, his hips slapping against you, the two of you moaned, fully giving up on staying quiet, getting lost in the feel of each other.
his rough hands grabbed at your ass, tugging you towards him with each thrust, sweat collecting along his hairline. his eyes switched between looking at your face and your pussy, tears still spilling over with a heated face, pussy covered in your shared fluids, throbbing around him.
feeling your high building up again, he held back his own, wanting to finally release together, he lifted a hand off of your ass, circling steadily over your little button to push you over the edge.
the band coiling inside of you finally snapped, and you whimpered as you squirmed around, body shaking uncontrollably. your nails dug into the sides of the bed, trying to hold on as he worked you through your orgasm, groaning out as he too let go.
you felt his hot cum spurting inside of you, moaning at the new feeling, praying internally that this would never end. your previously arched back fell down as your orgasm ended, aftershocks still wracking your body. you were happy that he had gotten to feel this good too, even if you didnât understand what that fluid was, or why heâd felt pleasure as well.
breathless, his body involuntarily folded itself over in exhaustion, slumping down onto yours. he tried to catch his breath, feeling your chest expand and collapse underneath his face, heart beating wildly.
he slid he cock out of you, and you were just about lucid enough to notice this time that the piece of equipment was attached to his body. you thought it was quite handy to have something so useful joined onto him, wondering if that was a part of the training to become a doctor.
hot cum poured out of your abused hole, trailing down onto the ripped up clinical paper, soaking the already damp material. remus pulled it out from under you, binning it before grabbing a couple of baby wipes from a nearby drawer.
âgood girl, did amazing for me, baby. yâmight just be my best patient,â
he wiped you down, soothing you when you jolted from the cold feeling of the wipes, unstrapping your ankles, then guiding you into slowly standing and redressing, turning away when necessary but occasionally peering over his shoulder to catch glimpses of your pretty body.
âi think weâll book you in for another session, letâs say two days from now? is 6:00pm alright with you?â he asked when you were ready to leave.
you quickly agreed, already excited for the next appointment. he helped you out to the car park where your parents were already waiting for you, ignoring the dirty look the receptionist gave the two of you, patiently holding you up as you stumbled along, before subtly patting at your bum, telling you that he canât wait to see you again.
part 2
#remus lupin#remus lupin x reader smut#remus lupin smut#smut#remus lupin x reader#remus smut#remus#remus x reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin fic#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin drabble#kinktober#kinktober 24#kinktober 2024#marauders#marauders era#marauders smut#harry potter#harry potter universe#my works#my work#oh my god
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did my heart love till now?
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remus lupin x fem!reader | sheâs a hopeless romantic who loves halloween. he loves her. or at least he very, very, strongly likes her in a way heâs never liked anyone else. enough to wear matching costumes
upcoming content: fluff! mentions of alcohol. lmk if you think i missed anything
authors note: i hope you like this! romeo & juliet is my favorite play and the 1996 film is my favorite movie! and remus is my favorite boy :â)!
word count: 2k
masterlist
remus had been staring at himself in the mirror for so long his reflection was starting to blur, like a watercolor painting made up of the soft brown of his hair, his pale complexion, and shining silver. he felt like a fool. âa lovesick fool,â james would say, but in this moment, he just felt like a fool. period.
âhey moony, have you decided what youâre going to be for halloween yet?â sirius asked as soon as he and james barged into their shared apartment. remus tore his gaze from his book at the sound of his best friendâs unnatural sounding greeting, loud and jilted as if heâd been practicing it.
ââŠno, wh-â
âwell look no further!â james very enthusiastically exclaimed, pulling a brown bag out from behind his back which promptly fell to the ground, the contents now hanging between him and sirius. it was a knights armor. metal shoulder pads atop a slinky silver long sleeve top with chains resting across the chest.
âwhat the fuck is that?â
âyour halloween costume!â james said as if it were obvious.
remus could do nothing but look at his two friends, who he cared for very deeply, as if they were right idiots.
âdonât you get it?â sirius asked, âitâs romeo!â
remus then felt his face red, heat rising to his cheeks all the way to his ears and he knew he couldnât play dumb to get out of this.
last week at dinner you had said that you were planning on dressing as juliet for halloween. âfrom the movie of course!â
âisnât that part of a couples costume?â marlene asked, âare you bringing a mystery man with you to my party?â
at that, remus tensed, his shoulders instinctively rising to his ears and his heart quickened waiting for your response. he hung out with you pretty much every day, youâre tight knit friend group always sharing at least one meal together. he felt like he would know if you had a boyfriend, but he was still feeling queasy waiting for your answer.
âno mystery men with me! i guess it could be a coupleâs costume, but itâs so pretty, i donât mind doing it solo.â
remus felt his body relax and continued to pick at his food, stealing glances at you whenever he could, missing the mischievous looks being traded between james and sirius.
âi am not wearing that,â remus said resolutely.
âwhy not? girls love this stuff!â sirius responded, tossing the costume on remusâ lap. he refused to touch it, as if any sign that he openly had feelings for you would somehow come back to bite him in the ass. it rested on his legs like an anchor.
âyou want me to surprise her with a matching costume? thatâs pathetic.â
âitâs sweet!â james stressed.
âyeah, and sheâs always so heart eyed over that gooey romance shit, you show up in this and sheâll be begging for it!â
siriusâ crude comments was met with a smack in the head from james and an unimpressed stare from remus.
âremus, iâm telling you, this is a perfect idea! sheâs single and dressing as one half of the greatest couples in history, if you show up as the other half, oh itâll be like straight out of the pictures!â james swooned. remus felt his heart soften at his overdramatic friend, who he knew was just trying to help him be happy, but his nerves overpowered any convincing.
âyou do know they both die at the end, right? kill themselves, even. not sure thatâs a message i want to send.â remus muttered, standing up from the couch to go to his room, tired of his friendâs antics.
âyouâll never get a date by just staring at her, mate!â james called out, âand sheâs well fit, too! youâre time is running out and you know it!â sirius added as remus walked down the hall, the metal costume in tow, only to be shoved in his closet.
but as halloween inched closer and his feelings for you only grew stronger, james and siriusâ words echoed in his head. he could never get the thought of your soft voice and sweet smile out of his mind, he liked you. so much.
you were always the one who kept listening to him when whatever he was saying was drowned out by the group. always spoke to him in dulcet tones, especially when you felt he had a headache. you were smart and funny and kind, not to mention beautiful. beautiful in a way that reminded him of the princesses and angels he would read about in books when he was a child. soft and warm, a glow seemingly always emanating from your figure.
remus would be content with just looking at you for the rest of his life, he thinks (deep down in the back of his brain, terrified of the strength of his own feelings) but it would be nice to do it without the feat of getting caught by your stare, or his friends taking the mick out of him afterwards.
so here he stood, his torso slightly weighed down by the heavy detailing, but it fit him well nonetheless. it was almost time for them to leave for marleneâs and remus could hear his friends in the living room. he had to make a decision soon.
âyâcoming, moony?â james asked through the door.
remus took a deep breath, biting off a square of chocolate. he could do this. it was halloween! youâre supposed to be in a costume. and the film was popular enough, he figured, that he could play it off as a coincidence if things went south.
ââŠyeah, iâm coming.â he stepped out the door and walked down the hall, rolling his eyes at jamesâ loud gasp.
âoh my god youâre wearing it!â james practically screeched.
âdonât make me change my mind.â
âoh remus, youâre so handsome!â sirius teased in a high pitched voice, âplease be my romeo!â
âfor it is the east, and juliet is the sun!â james recited.
âthatâs it, iâm changing!â remus exclaimed, only to be dragged back by his waist and walked out the door.
remus was hit by the noise of the party as soon as marlene swung the door open. her eyes trailed down jamesâ superhero outfit, sirius dressed as patrick bateman, and then remus, her face exploding in an open mouth smile. âreeeeemussss!!!!â she squealed, clearly already on her way to drunk, âyouâre such a sweetheart!â she cooed, remusâ cheeks reddening more than he thought possible.
âisnât he just? now let us in marls, itâs fucking freezing out here!â sirius said, and with a pat on the back, he and james were emerged in the crowd.
âshe isnât here yet, remus, but oh my god sheâs going to love it,â
as the night went on remus had practically glued himself to marleneâs increasingly wasted side all night, no sign of james or sirius (who he would bet money are upstairs with dates, or each other), and more importantly no sign of you. he was feeling more foolish by the minute, the metal top growing uncomfortable against his sweaty skin.
disappointed was pooling in his stomach as marlene was nodding off on his shoulder, or so he thought, but he was brought out of his thoughts when a loud yelp escaped her. âyouâre here! finally!â
marlene jumped up and stumbled over to a vision in white. flowing silk draped over your body, delicate, feathered wings pinned to your back. excess fabric tied around your waist, framing you beautifully. stunningly. remus felt like he was having an out of body experience, watching himself stand frozen in the middle of the living room, mouth slightly agape, willing himself to do anything other than stare.
âREEEEMUS LOOK! LOOK WHO IT IS!â marlene shout-whispered, shoving you towards him.
you felt your breath escape you at the sight. remus, tall and sweet, looking down at you, his tussled hair dancing across his forehead and his long fingers reached up to brush it out of his eyes, hand trembling. you werenât fully convinced you werenât dreaming.
âshe, sheâs pretty out of it,â he spoke softly, referring to marlene who was now dancing with a lamp.
ây-you look, i-i really like your costume, obviouslyâ you murmured, fiddling with your hands, resisting the urge to run your hand down his sculpted cheeks.
ever since you met him, you believed remus was one of the most beautiful people youâve ever seen. and then once you got to know him, got to experience first hand his limitless kindness, his witty remarks that always put the boys teasing to shame, and his rare barking laugh that only comes out when he finds something really funny (you elicited it from him once and have spent forever chasing that high).
all your friends said he had a thing for you. that he was always staring at you with soft, hooded eyes, move his plans around for you whenever you asked to study together, rest his jacket on the seat next to him so it would appear taken so no one else would sit down it it until you came.
but you were both famously mild-mannered, shy to a fault, and your feelings never rose to the surface, but the same couldnât be said for right now.
âoh, thank you,â remus responded, âi thought it would be nice if we could match.â
a giggle escaped you at that and you looked down, unable to meet his eye, you both wearing twin smiles.
absolutely thrilled with your reaction, remus bent his body in half, tilting his head up to catch your gaze, eyes filled with hope, âwhatâd yâthink?â
âi think you look very dashing, rem, i didnât know you were a shakespeare fan.â
âhmm, not so much,â with a deep breath he let out, âiâm a fan of you, thoughâ
the neon lights flashing over you both contributed to the bubble you found yourselves in. the rowdy guests nothing but white noise as you felt your heart pound against your chest over the soft spoken boy.
âreally?â it slipped out. deep seeded insecurity worming itâs way to the forefront as you were positively overwhelmed with confronting your feelings⊠and that who you had them for.
remusâ heart splintered a little at your warbling ask, âyesâ he let out, easy as breathing, âof course.â he placed a large hand on your shoulder, his thumb dancing on the edge of your collarbone.
âiâm a fan of you, too. more than anyone else,â you whispered with a step closer, your white ballet flats lightly knocking against the tips of his black boots, the space between you dwindling.
âarenât i lucky,â remus murmured wistfully, âto have an angel say that about meâ
with that you couldnât take it anymore and pressed your lips to his, immediately getting lost in the sparks. unsure of what to do with your arms, you awkwardly placed them on remusâ forearms, as if you were holding him still in place. he smiled against your lips, the breath escaping from his chuckle dancing across your face as he lightly dragged your hands up his chest to rest on his shoulders.
you melted as he pulled you in, you gasped as he ran his tongue against your bottom lip, you chased after his lips when he pulled away with a stuttering breath. âyâhave to give me a minute angel, or mâheartâs going to give out,â
you giggled, knowing exactly how he felt as he tucked his face into your neck.
âoi oi, câmon lupin! what did i tell ya! i knew you could do it!â sirius shouted from across the room, thrusting his cup in the air in congratulations.
âoh christ,â remus muttered, his annoyance dissipating with your laugh.
âyou are a lover, moony! borrow *hic* cupid's wings and soar with *hic* them above common ground!â james, although very drunk and hiccuping, recited.
all remus could do was roll his eyes, he had everything he wanted right in front of him. after he was done kissing you until the sun came up (and a little bit more after that), he could figure out when the fuck james seemingly memorized romeo and juliet.
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#remus lupin#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x fem!reader#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin fic#remus lupin fanfiction#loveyouprongs#Marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders era#marauders fandom
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⟠Best Remus Lupin Fics on Tumblr â
> Fluff <
Period Pains
I'm Your Boyfriend
Skin
Shy!Remus
Whimsical
âł [ @moonstruckme ]
Little Family
Full Moon Drabble
âł [ @wasteddmoondust ]
It's Blue the Feeling I've got
âł [ @jamespottersdaisy ]
Drunk
Sunshine!Reader
âł [ @luveline ]
Kiss
Whipped
âł [ @bruisedboys ]
Shy!Reader ~ [ @daenysx ]
Lazy Sunday Morning ~ [ @gtgbabie0 ]
No Boundaries ~ [ @ddejavvu ]
Sore ~ [ @ellecdc ]
Missed Hints ~ [ @empress-simps ]
Scars ~ [ @crimsntwlip ]
Kisses as Payment ~ [ @diwatopia ]
Lunar Possession ~ [ @jasmines-library ]
Anxious!Reader ~ [ @madwcman ]
Drabble ~ [ @contrarinshiit ]
Annoying Serenading ~ [ @shiftermia ]
Infatuated ~ [ @fourmoony ]
Touch Starved ~ [ @gtgbabie0 ]
Introduction to the Son ~ [ @starzqzi ]
Never His ~ [ @weasleykisses ]
> Hurt/Comfort <
It's Nice to Have a Friend
Sweet Nothing
âł [ @jamespottersdaisy ]
Migraine ~ [ @moonstruckme ]
Blue Moon ~ [ @ellecdc ]
Unconditionally ~ [ @sarahisslytherin ]
Snappy ~ [ @luveline ]
#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin headcanon#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin fic#possessive remus lupin#remus lupin baby blurb#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin fan fiction#remus lupin hurt/comfort#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin scenario#remus lupin x f!reader#remus lupin x fem!reader#remus lupin x self insert#remus lupin x whimsical!reader#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x yn#remus lupin x you#remus x you#remus lupin oneshot
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can u do a remus x reader where they are best friends and remus has been in love with reader forever, and reader is kind of a player because she also loves remus but didnt know that the feeling was reciprocated
i did a bit of a different take on this, hope you enjoy it babe
Words: 4.8k
Warnings: suggestive references and themes (talk of shagging, etc.), drinking and partying in hogwarts, fem!reader, use of y/n, sirius' pov for half then your pov (with all the mental tirades that includes), partier!reader more so than player, you have snogged james and mary (in the past), platonic!sirius but borderline fwb at one point, platonic!wolfstar, pining!remus, secretly pining!reader, no slutshaming, background jegulily, confessions, happy ending ofc
a blurb about everyone's reaction
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Sirius was in a bit of a difficult situation.
On the one hand, he had a beautiful girl all but crawling into his lap in the middle of an admittedly good party and he knew she would be a hell of a great time.
On the other hand, he was absolutely certain that his best friend was in love with her, despite his many denials, and he was not sure if she herself knew yet.
She had to, right? You had to know that Remus was in love with you with how he had been making puppy eyes at you more or less since first year. The two of you were the best of friends and went everywhere together â it was simply impossible that you had not had a conversation or two about it. But then again, Sirius and Remus were also the best of friends and he had not heard so much as a squeak about any such conversation taking place, let alone him admitting his feelings.
Could you truly be so oblivious? You had to know, and are choosing to live your life as you wanted regardless, as is your right. Would Sirius be an arse if he rejected your current casual advances because of Remus? If he was, would he be an arse for telling you about Remus' feelings or for dictating how a woman conducts herself based on the feelings of a man?
Sirius was way too drunk to be thinking any of these thoughts.
Yet, immediate action was required in order to handle the situation at hand. You and Sirius had been sitting beside one another for a while now, your leg thrown over in between his thighs, his arm wrapped securely around your shoulders, your hand on his chest. The music was absolutely blaring, the alcohol was flowing freely through your bodies, making the places where you touch that much hotter, in all semblances of the word. Sirius knew that if he was to tilt his head down to look at you, your lips would surely smash together.
It was not uncommon for you to shag some lucky bastard at these parties. You were carefree and fun in that way that made you fit seamlessly into your group of friends when Remus introduced you. It was never serious or deep on either front, Sirius knew as much â you and Mary had an arrangement of mutual fun going on for a while and you had even snogged James once before he got with Regulus and Lily.
Sirius participated equally as enthusiastically and the two of you were good friends, so really, it made sense that you ended up in this situation at last.
Still, sirens were flaring in his head screaming "BAD FRIEND, BAD FRIEND" the longer he sat with you like this. Because whenever you did find someone to hook up with at a party, you always left Remus' side to do so, as you were otherwise attached at the hip. And Sirius was the one left to watch him struggle to keep his face from crumbling every time. He was also always the one to poke the bear â or the wolf, if you please â by confronting Remus about his feelings for you constantly, both in a playful and serious manner.
As the designated campaigner for "Remus get your shit together and kiss her yourself", he should not be making that more difficult for his best mate.
He also should not get involved in whatever delicate situation you two had going on, but when his eyes flicked across the room, terrified to make eye contact with Remus wherever he was, determination grew in his chest. Something had to be done.
"Are you good, Siri?" you asked from beside him, words slurred just enough for him to know you were tipsy but not so much that he was concerned.
He took a deep breath. "Actually. Can we talk? Alone?"
Your body grew a bit tense against his, enough that he knew you understood this was not some scheme to get you alone. "Sure," you said wearily, already detangling your body from his.
The two of you got up and hastily made for the portrait hole. Sirius hoped that the cool stone walls outside would help him sober up enough to be able to communicate effectively.
His heart sank just a little bit when he caught sight of familiar tawny hair leaning against the wall by the exit. He knew all too well how this looked. Remus' eyes lit up when they landed on you, his mouth opening to make some sort of greeting when the words died on his tongue at the sight of a guilty Sirius trailing behind you.
You seemed nonplussed. "Oh, hi Rem," you said brightly, almost giggling around your words from the alcohol. You stepped off your path for a second to press a kiss to his cheek, smiling softly at him. "You having fun?"
Remus' face seemed strained, but he kept his smile up, even if just for you. "Yes, dovey. Are you?"
You nodded and squeezed his hand before taking a few steps back and away from him. "Very much so. We're just heading out for a quick chat."
He looked quickly between you and Sirius, never quite meeting his eyes, and Sirius felt as if he was being incriminated just by standing there with his hair slightly tousled from you playing with it. The hurt he could see play across his best mate's face was exactly the type of thing he was hoping to avoid by the awkward conversation he was about to have.
Remus' smile grew more thin-lipped than before as his gaze settled somewhere on your cheek. "Great. Have fun."
You just nodded once more before turning on your heel and making a beeline for the door, seemingly unaware of what just transpired between the three of you. Sirius stalled for a moment, wondering if he should say something, but decided against it in case Remus tried to stop him once he realised what the chat actually will be about.
It didn't much matter, though, because Remus stalked off without ever meeting his eyes.
With a heavy sigh, Sirius hurried over to the door to the common room that you were holding open from the outside, smiling back at him. You truly were such a lovely girl, and he hoped to Merlin he was not fucking anything up for you right now.
Stepping through the portrait, he let the Fat Lady slam shut behind him, cringing at the sudden silence that enveloped the two of you. Though, the air was as much of a welcome reprieve as he had expected it to be, and he breathed in a huge chunk of it to steal his nerves.
"Listen, Sirius, if things got too touchy in there then I'm sorâ" you tried to begin, but he all but threw his hands up between you in a display of innocence.
"No, no, dollface, don't you worry about that one bit," he laughed out nervously. "I was very much enjoying myself. I just realisedâ fuck how do I say this?"
He tried to think clearly and find a way to communicate what he knew in his heart to be true.
"No swearing in my halls!" The shrill voice he knew to belong to the portrait that had tortured him for seven years sounded behind him.
"Sorry, ma'am," he said rather petulantly and held out his hand for you to take so that he could lead you down the hall and away from her. He also hoped you read it as the display of well-meaning and friendship that it was.
You accepted his hand gracefully and his heart did calm down just the slightest from it.
The two of you hurried down the hallway, feeling every bit the teenagers that you were, settling down in a corner just far enough away for privacy. The cool stone did marvels for his overheating, and Sirius took full advantage of it by leaning his head back against them.
"What did you realise?" you asked then.
"Huh?" he answered, admittedly quite dumbly.
You had the decency to laugh at him instead of mock him. "Earlier. You said I didn't do anything wrong, but that you realised something."
Sirius heaved a deep breath. "Right, right," he murmured before clearing his throat. Was he overstepping? Possibly. Would he be ripping the bandaid off anyway? Absolutely. "See, I was having fun earlier and saw it as what it was â just two friends having fun, yeah? But I fear not everyone feels the same."
"I swear to Godrick, if you accuse me of having feelings for you, Black, I will chuck you off the Astronomy Tower," you said through a laugh.
"I'm thankfully not that conceited, babe. But it wasn't you I was referring to."
You looked at him as if to say who, then?
"I thinkâ or no, I actually know for certain, even if the stupid sod won't admit it. Erm, okay, so. Wow, how do I explain that? He's my best mate, you know, and Iâ"
"Sirius, you are making no sense right now."
"Remus is in love with you."
You had opened your mouth to volley back, clearly expecting him to still be stumbling over his words, but now it was just left hanging open as you stared at him, baffled. The two of you sat in silence for much longer than Sirius could have expected, or perhaps that was just his nerves dragging out the moment. You seemed to be fighting for breath.
"Excuse me, what?!" you breathed out, voice increasing in crescendo throughout your sentence. The what ricocheted down the hall; Sirius grimaced.
"So, you didn't know," he surmises, having answered his mental tirade from earlier. "I honestly don't know how you haven't seen it, that boy has literally been mooning for you for years. I'm surprised we haven't had to keep the actual Moony from tracking you down and wagging his tail at you once a month."
Your face told him that this was not a time for jokes, yet somehow you still laughed at that. Sirius realised with horror that your laugh sounded rather wet and saw you aggressively wiping at your face, as if you were about to start crying. "I'm so confused," you whispered.
Sirius sat there rather dumbly, unsure how to make it any more clear. "I don't know what to tell you, babe. He has feelings for you, always has. I don't blame you if you don't return them and I'm sure neither will he â but, yeah no, I figured you should know. And while I totally respect you shagging whoever you want, I just don't think he could handle it if it were me. So I have to back out."
Miraculously you nodded in understanding, despite his ramblings. Your movements were slow, as if you were trying to let his words settle in your bones, processing years of misinterpreting in a matter of seconds.
Sirius wanted to help. "I've tried to get him to tell you himself, but he hasn't even admitted it out loud yet."
That seemed to snap your attention back to him, a fierce look growing rapidly in your eyes. "He hasn't told you? Then how do you know?!" You waved your hands between the two of you to emphasise his point.
Not quite what he expected, Sirius found himself scrambling for words. "Everyone knows! It's literally written all over his face whenever you're near!"
"I've been looking at that same face a lot and I haven't seen that?" you question then, wielding your argument as if you were about to disagree with him.
"Y/N. Baby." Sirius tried to articulate his words clearly. "Remus has feelings for you. I swear on my life. You don't have to do anything with that information, I just had to tell you."
You narrowed your eyes at him, seemingly scrutinising every inch of his face. "If this is a prank, you're dead, Black."
"It's not a prank. I swear on Effie and Monty Potter, the absolute angels they are." He held his hands over his heart for emphasis.
"You could be wrong."
"I'm not though."
You hummed in consideration, still not letting him out from the hold of your inspecting eyes. "I have to go find out." You said it as if it was plain and simple, and before Sirius knew it, you were standing above him.
"What?" he said, again dumbly. He should never drink again.
"Thank you, Siri, I'll see you later," you called as you were already moving down the hallway at an impressive speed, given you had been shocked still mere seconds ago.
Sirius remained sitting on the floor letting his head drop back against the stone and his eyes fall shut. He has either taken one for the team or massively fucked up â the best part is that he still had no idea which one it would be.
This was bound to be an eventful evening.
âââ ââ
âŸâ
â âââ
Your heart was resounding through your entire body and you could barely feel the tips of your fingers â not at all because of the alcohol, you were actually quite certain you had more or less sobered up by now.
No, it was because Remus loved you. Remus Lupin, the best friend you could ask for, the unrequited, unattainable love of your life, for some unidentified reason loved you.
According to Sirius, at least.
Merlin, how you would skin him alive, should he be wrong.
The party had picked up its pace in the few minutes you and Sirius spent outside in the hallway. Someone had conjured up a light fog to roll around on the floor, allegedly to help with the atmosphere but no doubt it was really because the floor was becoming too filthy to look at directly. Warm bodies pressed into each other everywhere and there was a smell of sweat and drinks that on another day might have been enticing. Right now, you only had one focus.
"Where's Remus?" Your words were rushed as you latched onto the nearest arm you could find, grinning brightly when the familiar face of James came into view.
"Hiya, love," he greeted merrily, his other arm wrapped protectively around Lily. "What's up?"
"Remus. Where is he?" you repeated, albeit a bit more abashedly as you saw Lily glance at James sideways.
"Oh," James said and furrowed his brows, as if he was thinking. Then, he turned his head down to look at Lily who was already regarding him. "Where do we think Moony is, darling?"
Lily shifted her gaze between the two of you while biting her lip. She seemed to be making a quick appraisal. "I believe he headed up to the dorm early. Something about feeling tired?"
Nothing got past Lily, and you could tell from her somewhat smug yet concerned expression that she knew something you did not. Or, perhaps you did.
You let out a quick breath. "Oh." You couldn't help the slight guilt that settled in your stomach â even though you still couldn't know for certain that it was because of you. "I'll go find him, then."
"Are you sure?" Lily asked. "He might want to just sleep it off."
Sleep it off?
You nodded, confidence in your choice growing with every second. "I'm sure, yeah, but thanks Lils."
There was not a speck of judgement in her eyes, though her smile remained apprehensive. "I mean, he always wants to be with you, so it should be fine." She winked at you and suddenly your stomach was dropping because did everyone but you know?
Well, perhaps not James because he looked between you and Lily, entertained confusion written all over his face. "Okay, then. Great? See ya later, yeah?"
You squeezed both of their forearms in thanks before stepping backwards away from them, almost knocking into two people on the way. God, this place was packed. You threw some general sound of agreement that hopefully sounded as warm as you intended it before all but running towards the stairs to the boys' dormitory. On the way, you swear you almost lost your life twice, tripping over feet that grew invisible in the fog.
By the time your steps landed on the stairs, you were able to squeeze into the stone wall and quickly run up while avoiding those hanging over the railing. Truly hazardous, these Gryffindors.
The trek down the hall to the dorm Remus had shared with his friends for all seven years of your friendship was as practiced as it was easy. Yet, as your mind was replaying your conversations with Sirius and Lily over and over at record speed, it felt like it stretched on for miles, your own road to Calvary.
Your fingers acted off of instinct as they reached up to quietly rap on the door with two knuckles.
"Sod off," you heard Remus' muffled voice call through the door. You couldn't help the small smile that spread across your face.
You cracked the door open just enough to poke your head through and catch sight of him sprawled out on his bed, face down. Your smile widened. "Me too?"
It was as if his body was a push poppet that suddenly had its strings drawn taut again â his spine straightened and his head whipped around to look at you wide-eyed. He clearly had not expected you. He made some sounds that could probably classify as guffawing before he snapped his mouth shut to sit up and collect himself. The whole process was barely a few seconds, but the syrupy effect on time from the hallway seemed to have joined you into his dorm. Relief washed through your body when he smiled at you, even if it seemed somewhat strained.
"Of course not dove, sorry."
You slipped the rest of your body in through the door and shut it quietly behind you. The silence in this dorm had never felt so complete before.
In your rush to get to him, you hadn't once thought to think of what to say to him. How could you ever possibly breach the topic? It seemed like he could sense your hesitation because he sat more comfortably on the edge of his bed, wool sock-clad feet planted firmly against the floor. He had an inquisitive yet somewhat nervous look on his face.
He beat you to it. "You alright? Shouldn't you be out there, having fun?"
You couldn't help reading some judgement in that, knowing what you now maybe know. "What's that supposed to mean?" you asked, not quite able to hide the potential hurt in your voice.
Remus could pick up on your every mood and his eyes widened comically and he raised his hand as if he was about to talk to a scared wild animal. "Nothing! No, not like that, I just meant â it's a party. You love parties. Did someone hurt you?" His voice grew small by the end of his sentence. You feared someone was referring to Sirius, the only reason he could imagine you leaving a gathering to go be alone with him. You hated the idea.
There were probably a hundred better ways to go about this, but your mind felt muddy with the overwhelming feelings, your earlier drinks and the damn fog that somehow had made its way into your lungs. And you just could not believe any of it.
You were not proud of what you said next.
"Remus, are you in love with me?"
If it had been quiet before, there were no words for the shift in atmosphere after that question. It was like you were alone in a black hole, just the two of you.
Remus' head actually reared back from shock, both from your suddenness and the question itself. His pretty mouth hung slightly open, bottom lip making a slight jerky movement you could only describe as quivering.
"Iâ what?" He let out, it was somewhere between a gasp and an exclamation.
You took a few steps closer, so that you were standing in front of him, feeling the sudden need to be near, to hear, to know. "Sirius told me."
Remus jerked up too, suddenly standing within arm reach. His eyes were fluttering and his mouth opening and closing in a way that almost confirmed it on its own. "Y/N, Iâ"
"Remus." You interrupted quietly, sensing his continued shock and oncoming fib. "Don't lie, please."
"I'm so sorry," he whispered then, eyes growing glossy as they flicked all over your face. "Iâ I'm sorry."
Your eyebrows furrowed as you took in his pained expression. "I don't understand?" you said weakly. Why was he apologising? "Remus, are you in love with me?"
He shut his eyes and turned his head to the side. Your fears were confirmed when he brought up a hand to wipe at the part of his face you couldn't see. "Please," he begged. "Don't."
Don't make me say it.
You have to.
"Remus." Your tone matched his despairing one â his name was your plea.
He turned his head back to you and met your eyes head on with his own red-rimmed ones. A slow sigh was let out through his nose, the sound of defeat, giving in to you as he always did.
Gods, he always did.
"I'm in love with you," he whispered then. Clearly, without any hint at insecurity or deceit.
You took one small step closer, bringing your trembling fingers up to lightly ghost over his cheeks â not quite holding his face, but almost, millimetres apart. You were sure you looked half-crazed as you stood there in silent shock, studying his face in a flurry.
There was no contempt in his face at your stupor. Just guilt and sorrow.
"Why?" you breathed out.
"I'm sorry," was all he offered, once more.
"No, no, don't say that," you insisted, voice suddenly growing stronger. More certain. Your hands made proper contact with his cheeks, and you could feel him deflate beneath your touch. "Please don't be sorry."
At last some confusion drifted into his eyes as he regarded you. "Don't tell me not to apologise; that just makes me want to apologise for apologising." There was light humour in his tone, a smidge of hope. Hope that you wouldn't believe him awful for falling in love with you.
He was in love with you.
You laughed then, not just at his poor attempt at a joke but at the situation, at the prospect.
"You love me?" There was no hiding the absolute awe in your voice.
The guilt was still there, but it made room for softness as he gave you the smallest, saddest smile. "Of course, dove."
You breathed a sigh of relief and leaned forward to kiss his smile into a happy one.
Remusâ body immediately stiffened beneath your touch, shock radiating through him. Then, beautifully, you felt him soften once more beneath you, felt his eyelashes brush your cheeks as his eyes fluttered shut, felt him blow the air from his lungs through his nose in a long sigh, breath warm and inviting against you. Slowly, you parted your lips and brought his between yours, deepening the kiss. Unlike your movements earlier, there was no urgency, there was just him in your hands, him against your lips, his tongue against yours.
You let one of your hands travel to the nape of his neck where you played with his shorter strands of hair, breaking the kiss to lean your forehead against his. Your eyes remained closed as you soaked up up the moment, but you could feel his own burn through your skin. Could hear him guffawing again. A smile settled permanently onto your lips.
âYou love me?â you repeated, knowing the answer, but wanting to feel the words on your tongue once more, mixing with him.
He nodded fervently against you, jostling your head slightly to which you let out a soft giggle.
âYouâ Iââ he began, cutting himself off. âDo youâŠ?â he trailed off, unable to finish his sentence.
âI love you,â you whispered, in awe at getting to say the words aloud in this context. âIâm so in love with you, sweet boy.â
His body disconnected from yours briefly, forcing you to open your eyes and support your own weight, as he leaned back to stare at you incredulously, confused, shocked. His eyebrows were furrowed almost as if he were mad, but you knew in your heart that he was not.
âIâ no, that makes no sense,â he whispered almost to himself, shaking his head as he tried to process your words. You fought not to laugh at that â because it would seem like you were laughing at him and that was not nice. You would have more than enough time to be not nice later, for now he needed your patience. âYou? Love me?â
You nodded with a smile. His body was still close to yours and you took the opportunity to wrap your arms around his waist, interlocking your fingers at the small of his back.
There was so much emotion and vulnerability swimming in his eyes, you would almost feel bad if you werenât so unbelievably happy.
âI never thought you could have feelings for me,â you confessed breathlessly, grinning wickedly despite the pain you were sharing. âHere Iâve been, running around thinking the greatest love I had ever felt was wholly unreciprocated.â
This only seemed to confuse him further, though he was relaxing beneath your touch. âYou⊠This whole time?â
âI suppose so,â you mused. âI only realised two years ago, though.â
Remus let out a groan and a laugh at the same time and then â thanks to any and every god â he leaned his forehead on your shoulder, burying his face in you. âI cannot believe Iâve been torturing myself and youâve been⊠in love with me too. This whole time.â
You dared to kiss the side of his head from where he was leaning against you and tightened your hold on him. Something you had done a thousand times over as his friend, yet this sent entirely new sparks through you.
As if he just thought of something, he lifted his head suddenly to furrow his brows at you. âWhy would you ever think I couldn't love you?â
You tilted your head at him. âHow many times have you not brushed Sirius off when he makes jokes about us? Or said you would never want to be in a relationship? I thought you might view me as a sister by now.â Despite your teasing, residue hurt still clung to your words.
The grimace was instant and Remus shook his head as if that is the worst thing he has ever heard. âGods, no, I sure do hope not.âÂ
You both laughed quietly, carefully. His hands were slow as they went up to hold your jaw, fingers brushing the side of your neck in reverence. âIâm sorry I made you think that, dovey.â
âDonât be. Then I have to be sorry for snogging our friends in front of you.â
Remus flushed slightly at your words, but the awed affection plastered all over his every feature did not waver. âI donât want you to be,â he murmured while still caressing you carefully. âI just⊠I just want you. Will you be mine, dovey?â
Your face inched closer and closer to his, your grins growing mirrored against each other. âI am yours,â you whispered against his lips before closing the distance once more.
The most heavenly kisses you ever shared would be those with your lovely Remus.
âââ ââ
âŸâ
â âââ
âOi! Pads!â
Sirius flinched with his whole body, looking over his shoulder with a sheepish smile to face his inevitable death in the form of one Remus Lupin. He had been waiting for it all night as he partied with James, and had managed to get halfway through his second game of butterbeer pong before it was time for his execution.
Reaching out for Jamesâ hand, he shook it firmly and matter-of-factly. âLovely knowing you mate, take good care of my brother, yeah?â
James seemed entirely nonchalant to the whole ordeal, shaking his hand in return. âYeah, sure, safe travels Padfoot.â
Sirius then turned to Remus who was descending the stairs from the dormitory, holding his hands up in defence. âOkay, hear me outââ he begins but he was cut off.
He was cut off by a hug.Â
Remus borderline slams into him, locking his arms over his shoulders and dragging him close to his chest. Awkwardly, Sirius returns the favour, patting him on the back and making what the fuck eyes at Mary over Remusâ shoulder.
âYouâre a meddling bloody bastard,â Remus said into his ear.Â
Here we go.
âBut thank you.â
Oh. Oh.
He reared his head back so that he could see Remus and the shy yet pleased smile he wore, and Siriusâ whole face split into a painful, beaming smile. âIt worked?â he asked giddily, jostling Remus where he was still trapped in the hug.
âYeah, yeah,â Remus mumbled, though his grin grew.
The victorious, screeching holler Sirius let out was so loud it could be heard down to the dungeons.
#remus lupin#remus john lupin#remus#remus lupin fic#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin hurt/comfort#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#remus x reader#remus x you#remus x y/n#remus fic#remus fanfic#remus imagine#remus fluff#remus hurt/comfort#bsf!sirius#platonic!wolfstar#marauders#marauders era#marauders era fic#marauders era reader insert#marauders era self-insert#marauders x reader#marauders x you#marauders x y/n
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behind every hot girl there is unhealthy, slightly concerning, spiritual connection to harry potterâs dead parents dead friend group
#james potter#marauders era#moony#padfoot#sirius black#remus lupin#the marauders#lily evans#marlene mckinnon#mary macdonald#jily#wolfstar#dead gay wizards#the marauders era#james x reader#sirius x reader#james potter x reader#james potter imagine#james potter smut#james potter drabble#sirius black imagine#sirius black x reader#sirius black smut#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin drabble#dorlene#rosekiller#slytherin skittles#jegulily
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Oh oh what about soft!dom remus and reader whoâs upset over a conversation with her family and doesnât know how to let it go and he helps distract/regulate her???
Not sure if this is soft!dom, but he definitely helps reader relax and work through it mentally
âYouâre stewing dovey.â Remus murmurs as he reaches for you on the settee.
Heâs got a plate in one hand, bread pudding youâd been asking for all weekend and some fruit on the side.
âIâm sorry, itâs just, theyâre so mean and itâs fine when they do it. But when I stick up for myself suddenly Iâm a raging bitch.â
Remus shakes his head, kissing your temple as you start to get angry all over again. âYouâre not a bitch. Theyâre just close minded.â
He placed the plate in your lap and you sigh, leaning your head on his shoulder. âI just get so pissed because why itâs okay for them but Iâm a pariah when I do it? Iâm not immune to bad moods, I just donât take it out on everyone.â
Remus knows from Sirius that family relationships are tough. Siriusâ situation was different but he can see similarities between yours and his.
Your family, mainly your siblings, expect you to be this perfect golden child and you can never make a mistake and it weighs on you.
Itâs why Remus and you only see your mum when you visit and your sister sometimes. Your brothers are another story.
âAnd youâre better for that dovey. Youâre not a pariah, youâre allowed all of your feelings even if they try to make you feel bad. You wonât get censorship here.â Remus nudges your knee with his. âCâmon, eat before it goes cold.â
You take a bite and your shoulders drop a little- Remus is a wizard at bread pudding. Itâs somehow never sopping wet on the bottom. Itâs a comfort food of yours and after today it was necessary.
Remus chooses his words carefully while you eat.
âI know you care what they think of you, but I think sometimes they need the reality check you just gave them. They canât walk all over you and expect it not to get tiring.â
You nod, âI just, I donât want to be a bad person.â
Remus smiles at that. âYou could never be a bad person dove.â
You roll your eyes as you offer him the last bite. âYouâre biased, and youâre supposed to think highly of me.â
Remus speaks around the bite, âI am biased, but we both know Iâm not going to let you be a bad person if I thought thatâs what you were becoming.â
Itâs true. Remus has stopped many spirals and many mean rants the moment they got deprecating.
âSo youâd tell me?â
Remus kisses your temple, âIf I ever got a feeling that you were being a bad person Iâd tell you.â You seem content at that. Remus holds you closer to his chest. âFor the record, I thought you couldâve stood to be a tiny bit more stern on the phone, but Iâm proud of you for standing up for yourself.â
You smile as you tip your head back to his chest to look up at him. âAh, I had help learning how to do that.â
Remus rubs your chest at the admission. âWhoever they are, they seem very smart.â Thereâs a cheeky smile on his face, but mostly he really is proud of you for standing up for yourself.
âYou would think so.â
#remuslupin#remus lupin oneshot#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin fic#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin#remus lupin x black reader#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x yn#remus lupin x y/n
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Double Surprise | R.L.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/6b504152a72630011cb4028f3da6136d/977be8a0159042de-d4/s540x810/a4bfedeff84cb88670cabafc9c61b50fac3e418c.jpg)
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summary: The Marauders and Lily come over for Christmas Dinner but you and Remus have a little surprise for them all.
pairing: remus lupin x fem!reader
includes: mentions of sex, talks of pregnancy, drinking, sirius and reader acting like siblings, overall just fluff
a/n: this idea came to me randomly đ€·ââïž (and itâs not even Christmas time yet??)
Ever since you fell for Remus all those years ago, you knew he was the one you wanted to be with forever. He did as well. You went from talking, to dating, to engaged, and the latest: married. And every single time you fell harder and harder for him.
So it was no surprise that you wanted a child with him. A mini version of your love right beside you. After a long conversation with a worried Remus, you both decided it was time. You were able to soothe his thoughts about the full moon and a baby at the same time which you knew was his greatest worry. He didnât want to accidentally turn you nor the baby into what he was.
With many nights of trying â although both of you could argue that some of those nights were much more passionate than others â you were finally pregnant with his child. There was no other way to tell your friends about the news except over Christmas dinner, of course.
âHow do I look?â You bit the tip of your thumbnail in anticipation, looking at yourself through the mirror hung in the hallway. âPresentable enough?â
It wasnât like you were scared to tell them⊠Actually, you were beyond terrified to tell them, especially Lily. She was practically a sister to you at Hogwarts and you always told her everything that happened in your life. And having a baby was the most important news of all.
âGorgeous as always, dovey.â Remus murmured as he carefully wrapped his arms around you with his hand placed on your stomach, cradling the growing fetus.
You werenât showing at all. You were barely two months, but you knew he meant it as a comforting gesture. You tilted your head to look at him properly and smiled when he placed a gentle kiss to your lips.
You parted and bit your lip softly, smiling even harder as you looked between his eyes. âWhat was that for?â
âJust admiring the one I love.â He nudged his nose with yours and kissed you once more.
The moment was sweet enough to give you a cavity, but the rapid knocking from your front door caused the both of you to snap out of it. You lean your head on his shoulder and shut your eyes for a second, letting yourself stay in comfort for a little longer.
Finally â after more aggressive knowing from the door â you sigh and press a loving kiss to his lips. âGet the door, please? I need to check on dinner.â
âYou just donât want get cold.â Remus patted your hip as you sent him a cheeky smile.
âYou know me so well.â You blow him an air kiss as you sauntered into the warmth of the kitchen.
But even from the kitchen you could hear the shouts of the people at the door, which amused you beyond all doubt. Sirius â of course â was the loudest voice you could make out. His shouting loud enough for the neighbors to hear over the thickening snow.
âMoony, let us in! Itâs freezing!â Sirius shouted as he pounded on the door with his fist, teeth chattering.
The next voice you heard was James. And it was no surprise to you that he used his wifeâs name to get Remus to open the door faster.
âYou donât want Evans to freeze, do you?â
Finally, you heard Lilyâs voice through the thick door. âItâs Potter now, but we all know Iâm still your favorite, Rem!â
You snickered when you finally heard the door unlock and feet stumbling into the warmth of your house. The clunking of boots and your coat rack filled the air as you pulled the food out of the oven.
âOh, thank Godric.â Sirius immediately collapsed onto the arm chair, propping his feet up toward the fire place. âI couldnât feel any of my bloody fingers.â
Lily hastily placed her coat into Jamesâ hand before directing her attention to the Welsh man beside her. âRemus, I love you, but I love your wife so much more.â
At that, you perked up and rushed into the living room, colliding with Lily and crushing her in a tight hug. âItâs my favorite Potter!â
âHeyââ
âSays you, Mrs. Lupin.â Lily kissed both your cheek and held you in front of herself to get a better look at your figure.
Thankfully, you wore a comfy sweater that covered your barely showing bump. Lily rubbed your arms, smiling so bright it challenged the sunâs rays. You tuck strands of hair behind your ears, face radiating pure joy.
âHow did we both get so lucky?â You return her smile and lead her into the kitchen with questions trailing after. âHow are you?â
James looked at Sirius and Remus in disbelief, still surprised that the girls left them faster than the speed of light. Remus shrugged and still had a lovesick look on his face.
âYeah, Iâm not doing that.â James propped his coat and Lilyâs on the rack and snapped his fingers in front of Remus, sighing when he glared at him.
âAre you sure?â Sirius wiggled his eyebrows and nudged Remus with his elbow. âIt could be fun.â
âYou two are so weird.â Remus rolled his eyes and left them to set up the dining table, shaking his head when he heard the two of them bickering as they followed him.
âYouâre part of this friend group!â
As the smell of Christmas dinner filled the house â along with chatter from all of you â it was finally time to reveal your surprise to the group. They were merely talking amongst themselves as they ate dinner, oblivious to the glances you kept sparing to your husband.
You were still anxious about how the reveal would go down. Noticing this, Remus brought your hand up and kissed the back of it with a look a reassurance. Now you knew you had to tell them.
âMm, you know the Longbottoms? They have a child on the way.â Lily drank from her iced tea as she told you the latest gossip she heard since the last time she saw you.
âReally? It seems like everyone we know is.â Sirius swirled his wine around before downing it all in one go.
You grimaced at him, masking your face when he made eye contact with you.
He glanced around at the table and gave you and Lily confused looks, refilling his wine in the process. âHang on now, how come you,â He pointed a finger toward your figure. âAnd you,â He then pointed at Lily. âArenât drinking wine? Christmas is the best time to drink some.â
âSaving it for the in-laws.â You waved a hand around and did your best not to project nervousness. âBesides, Remus isnât drinking either.â
Sirius stuck his tongue out at you then quickly retreated when you sent him a dirty glare. He was about to protest when Remus interrupted. Remus knew that you two fought like siblings and it wasnât needed today.
âSpeaking of giftsâŠâ Remus squeezed your hand and grabbed your attention once more. âDovey got you guys early gifts.â
You nod slowly and clear your throat, letting excitement take over when you saw Lily light up. âWeâre going over to his parentsâ house for Christmas and I really want to see your reaction to this present. Itâs one that canât that long.â
As you stood up to find the presents for them, Remus guided them over to the living room right in front of the Christmas tree. The three of them sat across the carpet like children on Christmas morning. You handed them their gifts and took a seat next to Remus, his arm naturally moving across your shoulder.
Before Sirius could even tear into his gift, you stuck your hands out to stop him. He frowned and crossed his arms, almost like he was a child.
âSiriusâ I want you all to open them at the same time.â You swiftly spoke and fiddled with Remusâ fingers instead, effectively calming yourself down.
All together, the three of them opened their gifts and suddenly, gasps filled the air. Lily and Jamesâ mouths were gaping and you couldnât tell if it was good or bad sign.
âWhat do you guys think?â You bit the inside of your cheek and leaned your head in Remusâ shoulder, trying to defuse the nervousness creeping up your body.
Sirius huffed and spun the picture a thousand times without looking at the other gift inside. âI canât tell what it is⊠Whatâs written on it?â
âYouâre kidding.â James looked between you and Remus before down to your stomach, running his fingers through his hair.
âReally? Youâre being so serious right now?â Lily twisted the ends of her tissue paper in excitement, ready to jump all around the room.
âHey, waitââ Sirius tried to intervene, still clueless to what the photo was supposed to be portraying.
âCongratulations! The odds of this happening is pretty slim.â James stood and clapped Remusâ back, giving you both happy looks.
Your face twisted in confusion as you looked up at James, Lily trailing right behind. âWhat do you mean?â
âMe too.â Lily placed a delicate hand on her stomach, making you gasp in return.
âReally?â Your eyes shined brightly, grasping her hands in yours.
âYeah, just found out a couple of weeks ago.â She shrugged and watched James and Remus converse about the new fatherhood they would embark together.
âCongratulations, Lils!â You giddily exclaimed and pulled her into another soul crushing hug.
Lily laughed in enjoyment. Not only was she happy you were pregnant, but she was overjoyed by the fact you were pregnant as the same time as her. Although you were ahead by a little.
âWhat is happening?â Sirius whined, throw the paper onto the ground before looking inside the gift once more. Once he found the onesie that said he was going to be an uncle, everything clicked into place. âOhhâŠâ
âYou poor thing.â Remus rolled his eyes before meeting your happy eyes.
You radiated pure joy because of today and he swore that this memory would be etched into his mind forever. No matter what happened, he knew you always had someone to talk to about anything. He pulled your waist and kissed the top of your head, knowing damn well your face was red.
âIâm so happy for you, dovey.â He murmured softly and rubbed your stomach. âI love you more everyday.â
You look up and smile back, âI love you too, Rem.â
©lqveharrington - all rights reserved. do not copy, translate or share my work on other media platforms
#augustâs works đ«§#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin imagine#remus x reader#remus lupin hc#remus lupin angst#remus lupin oneshot#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin fic#remus lupin headcanon#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin#remus x you#remus lupin x self insert#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x you#remus lupin hurt/comfort#remus lupin my beloved#remus lupin blurb#andrew garfield#andrew garfield x reader#andrew garfield x you#hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry#hogwarts houses#harry potter x reader#hogwarts fanfiction
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remus x his girl with sleepy girl syndrome.
at a friendly gathering and she is trying SO hard to stay awake.
love u and ur work pls take care of urself
Thank you angel!
Remus Lupin x fem!reader ⥠516 words
Remus watches you from the corner of his eye. Youâre drooping, elbow propped on the table and chin propped on your hand, watching James and Sirius tell a story through half-lidded eyes. Remus leans over to speak to you at a murmur.Â
âWant to go home?âÂ
He immediately regrets phrasing it that way. You sit up straighter and look at him with forced attentiveness. âNo,â you say, lips tilting upward for his benefit. âIâm having fun.âÂ
Remus doesnât think youâre lying, but enjoyment and exhaustion arenât mutually exclusive. Dinner has gone on longer than either of you expected, dusk turning to true darkness and streetlamps flickering on outside the pub. He thinks youâre probably barely keeping yourself awake.Â
âWe could go, though,â he suggests gently. âIâm starting to feel ready for bed, too.â
âLetâs stay a while longer,â you say, though you loop your arm through his, leaning against his side. âI want to hear the rest of the story.âÂ
That last part is said just a bit more intentionally. Remus follows your gaze down the table to James, whose attention has caught on you. He doesnât seem to know whatâs passing between you and Remus, is too far away to have heard your small conversation, but he smiles anyway at your last words.Â
Itâs a lucky thing that his gaze wanders from you as he gets deeper into the story again. Soon your head dips until itâs resting on Remusâ shoulder. He keeps still, only wrapping one arm around your waist to hold you tucked up against his side. Your eyelids droop and then shut.Â
Remus strokes slow lines over your ribs with his thumb as James and Sirius wrap up their story. The length is somehow unaffected by how fast they tell it, voices overlapping and obscure details added between bouts of laughter, but eventually itâs done. Lily smiles into her drink, watching you.Â
Cute, she mouths to Remus.Â
He gives her a smile in return that says he knows.Â
âSweetheart.â He kisses your hair. âLetâs go, yeah? Letâs go home.âÂ
âMm?â You come awake with a remarkable job of acting, pretending as if youâve never been asleep at all. âNo, Iâm good.âÂ
Remus grins down at you. He reaches for your coat. âYou made it to the end of the story. I think thatâs enough for tonight.âÂ
âI did?â Your brow furrows, and Remus realizes you really hadnât known youâd been sleeping at all. âOh, shit. Mâsorry.âÂ
âNothing to be sorry for,â he laughs, standing and encouraging you along with him by your elbow. âI think weâre just ready to get some sleep. Here, dove.âÂ
He helps you into your coat, the both of you saying goodbye to your friends before leaving the warmth of the pub for the cool night. You attach yourself to Remusâ side instantly, arm wound through his.Â
âThink youâll be able to make the walk home?â he asks, only half teasing but wholly fond.Â
Your reply is less jocular. âYeah, I think so. Might lean on you if you donât mind, though.â
Remus tuts, kissing your head. âI never mind.â
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hiiii if youâre still looking for remus centered requests, i rly liked your best friend steve giving reader a hickey and couldnât help but think of Remus too! like him helping a shy reader not feel insecure about being the âinexperiencedâ one of their friend group⊠by giving her some experience đđ? love ya lots!
love u thank u for requesting<3
âRemus gives you your first kiss, and then a little more than that. You know, between friends. fem, 1.2k
âWill anyone kiss me tonight, or shall I go unkissed, like some leper?âÂ
You laugh at Siriusâ drama. âItâs not so terrible,â you say, coming up the hallway behind him and James, your face bitten by the cold.Â
âI know, my lovely little blueberry muffin,â Sirius croons, leaning back and prodding at your cheeks, the smell of cider stuck to him like a cloud, âhow you remain unkissed is a mystery to me. Shall we fix that now?âÂ
Sirius is your friend, he doesnât poke fun, but you flush nervously at his question. James grabs Sirius by the shoulders and yanks him away from you toward the kitchen, âStop teasing!âÂ
âIâm not teasing! I would love to kiss you, sweetheart, just as soon as I can figure out which one of you is the real one,â Sirius says.Â
Remus laughs and closes the front door, the last one in. He wraps his hand around your shoulders. âHeâd be so lucky,â he says loudly, sending a sulking, pouting Sirius in the opposite direction, James on his tail in giggles promising to feed him some unbuttered toast if he doesnât chill out.Â
Remusâ arm falls behind your back. âWhy does he act like that? Four drinks and heâs in love with everyone. He gets so urgent.âÂ
You confess slowly, âI canât say I blame him. Sometimes⊠I wish someone would kiss me quite urgently, and I donât even need to get drunk.â
âYou do?âÂ
âJust because Iâve never had one doesnât mean I donât want one,â you say, âitâs really weird being the only one who doesnâtâ who isnât dating anyone.â You fluster at your confession, worried itâs too much to share, even while his thumb rubs affectionately into your shoulder.Â
âIâm not dating anyone,â Remus says.Â
âNo, but, going for hookups and stuffââ
You falter as he laughs. âYou want one night stands?âÂ
âNo,â you say honestly, âbut still. Youâve all done that stuff and Iâm like, a twenty something loser.âÂ
âYou listen to Sirius too much. You have an entire life to find someone to kiss you.âÂ
âI sort of want it now, though,â you say meekly.Â
Remus laughs again, his arm wrapping tightly behind your back. Youâve both had a drink too, not tipsy like Sirius but the buzz of it perhaps the cause of your loosened tongue, and his easy touching, his teasing. He smiles down at you kindly, âYou want a kiss, is that it?â he asks, âSirius has upset you and a kiss will make it better?âÂ
You find you love the feeling of his chest pressed to yours, âI donât know. It would be nice to have one just so he can stop talking about it.âÂ
He pulls you right into him and angles his face against yours like heâs going to kiss you, his laughing a soft warmth on the tip of your nose. âYou want it right now?â he asks, his hand rubbing sweetly into your back. Layers of fabric feel useless; itâs like heâs caressing naked skin.Â
âYou canât kiss me,â you say.Â
âWhy not?âÂ
âWeâre friends.âÂ
âWhatâs a good kiss between friends?â Heâs following your eyes, he knows all your tones, Remus wouldnât play with you like this if he thought it wasnât what you wanted.
âI wonât know how to do it,â you warn in a whisper, your reluctance clearly fading. Â
âWell, youâre very pretty, so any bad kissing cancels out.âÂ
You bend into him as his arm pulls you up, your noses nearly touching, closing your eyes as he leans in.Â
âYou sure?â he asks.Â
âMm,â you hum, though he doesnât kiss you until you nod.Â
Your noses press together most of all, the strongest sensation, but then thereâs heat as his lips part so slightly and press into yours. He kisses upward and you have the sense to keep pressing down, letting his soft kisses move you with him, like an ebbing wave. You take an instinctive step back and he pauses, until you attempt to kiss him again and prompt him into movement âhe takes the lead. His hands grasp at your back like youâre water slipping through his fingers, letting a sound of pleasure filter from his lips into yours.Â
Itâs so peculiar. Itâs like fireworks, like all the books and movies say, but itâs more. Itâs so warm, and his lips are soft even as his kissing turns rougher, as he tilts his head to the side and his lips come apart against yours. Your hand climbs hesitantly against his side, then up, then stuck at the place just above his ribs.Â
âTouch me,â he says gently, breaking the kiss as your breath comes fast, âwrap your arm around me, itâs alright.âÂ
âAm I hopeless?â you ask, placing your arm behind his shoulder and tipping back to see his face.Â
He shakes his head, frowning, why is he frowning? âHopeless?â he repeats. His hand comes up to your face, and thatâs almost as bad as the kiss, the heat of his palm on your face and his thumb stroking over the slope of your cheek. He uses that movement to turn your head, and when he ducks in for another kiss, he murmurs, âNo, I wouldnât say hopeless,â the end of it lost on your lips.Â
This kiss is rougher again. Your heart beats so loudly you can hear the thump of it in your ears as your eyes close and you attempt to fit a hundred wanted kisses into one. He just squeezes you close and returns your enthusiasm, until you canât breathe, forced to hang your head over his shoulder as you pant for air.Â
Remus kisses your neck. Itâs a shock: you squirm at the sensation but let your head fall to the side as he does it again, not nearly as insistent as his lips had been on yours but something unsaid in the trail of his nose as it runs back up your neck and he kisses the skin below your ear. He slows, and slows, until heâs pulling away to stare at you.Â
You lift yourself up, nonplussed. âI didnât know it felt like that.âÂ
Remus shifts his hand from the side of your neck to the front, wiping at the marks of his kissing with his thumb where it wets your skin. âIt doesnât always.â He smiles at you with just a hint of smugness in his eyes. âI donât suppose you want to know what a love bite feels like?âÂ
âOi!â James calls from the kitchen. âWhat are you two doing?âÂ
You pull apart slowly from one another. You think he mightâve forgotten where you were, as did you.Â
James catches the fall of Remusâ hand where it had been on your cheek and squints suspiciously. âWhat are you guys doing? I made toast.âÂ
You canât look at him. Remus saves the day. âWeâre looking for her earring.âÂ
âYou wonât find it with the lights off.â He glares again with suspicion before turning back to the kitchen. âI didnât even know she wore earrings,â he mutters.Â
Remus gives you a sideways look. âMaybe I can show you what it feels like after?â he suggests, voice measured.Â
âBetween friends?â you ask.Â
âNo.â He puts his hand to the small of your back and gives you a gentle nudge down the hallway. âNot between friends.âÂ
#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x fem!reader#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#marauders era#remus x reader#remus x you#marauders#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin blurb#marauders x reader#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fanfiction#the marauders
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hi lovie! just had a thought of remus not being able to prepare the reader for him and going âdeep breath, babyâ cause this man has massive cock and thatâs it
this post is 18+, minors dni.
"It's gonna hurt," Remus hums, low and sweet as he presses a kiss to your flushed cheek. It's hot with lust and exhilaration, and he noses at the other one while your stomach clenches in anticipation.
"I can take it," You vow, and you really mean it, even if Remus is convinced it'll take time. You've seen him before, and he's impressive to say the least, but you're aching and wet, and there's nothing you want more than to feel Remus's thick cock slip into your eager cunt.
"Relax," He warns you, keeping his face pressed to yours, breathing in tandem with you and brushing his lips against your nose from proximity alone, "Relax, dove, y'hear me?"
"I'm relaxed," You promise, forcing your muscles to un-tense themselves. You feel the head of his cock prod at your slit, although it doesn't offer much resistance until his full circumference breaches your hole. All at once it's too thick, too big, too much, and you tense up again, thighs and stomach and hands all clenched as you gasp in a breath of air.
"Breathe, sweetheart, breathe," Remus coaches, stopping in his tracks, "Deep breath, baby, you're alright. We'll go slow."
"No, I can take it," You repeat, less confident this time, and nearly breathless, "Remus, I- I can take it."
"I know y'can," He croons, pressing another sticky warm kiss to your face, tucked between your nose and your cheek, "Just be patient, sweet thing. You can have it all, I promise. Just wanna make sure I'm not gonna rip you t'pieces, love."
#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin scenario#remus lupin oneshot#remus lupin one-shot#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin dialogue#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin headcanons#remus lupin headcanon#remus lupin hc#remus lupin hcs#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fic#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x you#remus lupin smut
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