#can i say this is 4.5 knives?

[callmeagardengnome]

✗ blood in the clouds ✗ | KIM HONGJOONG

pairings ✃ mafia leader! hongjoong x flight attendant! fem! reader

genre ✃ mafia au, non-idol au, SLOW BURNN

synopsis ✃

it’s finally your last day as a flight attendant. you wanted nothing more than to laze on your couch and watch netflix - just to find out that one of your passengers blew out the brains of your pilot with a gun.

in which hongjoong hijacks a plane that his rival’s daughter is on.

w.c ✃ 10.5k (yes im a yapper im sorry)

c.w ✃ dark themes, vivid descriptions of gore, guns and knives, kiss scene but no smut, use of the nickname ‘brat’, ‘pretty’ and ONE TIME - ‘princess’, your dad’s a dick oops, vulgar language, reader is smart

author’s note: this is the first oneshot of my mafia series! yes it is long but i promise you that it does eat and that you’ll enjoy it. remember to reblog and comment if you enjoyed, any and all feedback helps!

not proofread!

masterlist

white clouds drifted by the airplane window as the sky turned from a soft blue to a deep orange.

it would’ve been a pretty sight if it weren’t for the gun to your head.

you’d called in sick or put in your two weeks notice earlier if this was how your last day of being a flight attendant would end - but apparently, life hates you too much to let you catch a break.

HOUR 1 OF 7 - TAKEOFF

‘god- i can’t take this anymore,’ you thought to yourself. you hated waiting, despised it actually. 

after today, no more jet lag, rushed goodbyes or missing celebrations. you can finally unpack that suitcase for good, find someplace quiet and actually live in it. the thought alone was enough to keep you excited, but something bothered you at the back of your mind.

this trip didn’t feel right.

it wasn’t the plane itself, but your passengers? only 2 showed up in a plane that could seat at least 50 people. 

not that you were complaining. fewer passengers meant less work - which was a good thing. 

but the uneasiness you felt kept rising in your chest, no matter the times you tried to push it down. 

‘just 6 more hours,’ you thought. ‘then this will all be behind me.’

HOUR 2 OF 7 - MEALTIME

meal service started like any other: boring. 

after handing out the trays, you pushed the trolley back to its place and returned with beverages. you plastered on your most professional smile as you walked over to your passengers. “would you like a drink?”

the man with sunglasses turned to you lazily, his eyes shifting from the trolley to your face. “what do you have?”

you sighed, quietly but deeply. you had that stupid list engraved into your mind by now. “water, coffee, tea, coke, spri-” 

“-do you have alcohol?” he cut you off. 

your eye twitched. this dickhead.

first of all, he interrupted you. and secondly, you didn’t mention the alcohol on purpose. it was stored at the back of the plane and you did not have the energy to drag it out. 

“uh hongjoong- i mean, boss-“ the guy next to him whispered hurriedly. “i don’t think that’s a good idea-“

“-i think it is,” hongjoong interrupted before turning back to you. “where’s the menu?”

you gave him a forced smile as you pushed the alcohol menu towards him. he took his time with it, flipping through the pages slowly before finally saying, “two shots of whiskey.”

“sure thing,” you snatched the menu back. with a swift turn, you fetched the whiskey and the glasses, returning back to his seat.

you poured and placed the two shots on his tray table. he took the glass and drank it in one go, setting it back down with a thud. 

hongjoong then turned his head towards you, eyebrows raised. “what?”

you blinked. ‘what’? just ‘what’? where's the ‘thank you’? 

you were losing your mind.

“nothing,” you muttered through clenched teeth, moving away before he could ask for anything else.

grade A asshole.

HOUR 4.5 OF 7 - POINT OF NO RETURN

the shitty in-flight wifi was a joke as always. why did you even try?

with an annoyed sigh, you shoved your phone into your back pocket when suddenly-

static.

its piercing sound followed by faint garbled voices on the intercom startled you. you frowned as the sound continued, getting louder and more distorted.

with a groan, you stood up, straightening your uniform. ‘what are they doing?’ you thought as you walked towards the cockpit.

but when you passed by the first-class cabin, you paused. the seats were empty. both passengers were gone. ‘weird…’

things only got weirder as you approached the unlocked cockpit door. 

concerned, you pushed it open.

the smell hit you first - a metallic tang that twisted your stomach.

then your eyes caught up.

blood splattered the walls and windows in chaotic streaks, dripping down to the controls and the carpeted floor. the pilot and co-pilot laid in a gruesome pile to the side, the jagged holes in their skulls grotesque. 

a guy sat at the controls, steering the plane as though he wasn’t surrounded by horrors. 

grade A asshole- no, hongjoong, sat cross-legged on the floor, his sunglasses shattered at his feet. a gun rested in his hand and his lips curled into a smirk as he watched you enter.

“you’ve got to be kidding me..” you breathed out. 

pieces of brain and organ matter clung to the control panel as a simple blinking green light above that indicated that everything was, somehow, still functioning.

hongjoong tilted his head, amused. the gun shifted to point at what you now noticed was the crumpled bodies  of your pilots, their faces mangled in unrecognisable masses of flesh and bone.

“these your friends?”

you shook your head as you stepped back, wiping your sweaty hands on your uniform. hongjoong seemed to enjoy your reaction, his grin widening into something sickening. 

he smirked. “don’t worry, i won’t spoil that pretty face of yours.”

you coughed at the wretched smell as the crimson-stained carpet squelched beneath your heels, your mind begging you to leave.

“well-” you said, turning to the door. “i’m sure you don’t need me here, i’ll just-”

an audible click cut you off.

you froze.

slowly, you turned back to see a gun aimed directly at you.

“leaving so soon?” he raised an eyebrow. “let’s talk.”

HOUR 5 OF 7 - SKYDIVING DOESN’T SEEM TOO BAD

hongjoong dragged you to the first-class section to ‘talk’. it was the first time you’ve ever sat there and to be completely honest, this was not how you imagined yourself ‘enjoying’ it.

well, not like it mattered. you had other issues - like handcuffs locking you to the chair.

he stood infront of you, one hand gripping the gun while the other held a file. “‘____’, am i right?” he asked. 

you nodded slowly. “..that’s me.”

“3.6 GPA in university..” he muttered. “flunked out of med school during your first year..”

..how the hell did he get that information?

“you ended up as a flight attendant because your father owns the airline.”

“..yeah,” you reluctantly admitted, your stomach churning. “uh- was the med school part necessary?”

hongjoong ignored you, flipping to the next page. you watched his eyebrows shoot up as his eyes narrowed. “how close are you with your father?”

you blinked, confused by the weird question. “i mean- he’s my dad,” you replied. “but i haven’t seen him in years.”

“hm,” the sound came from him. hongjoong studied you for a moment longer before he spoke again, but this time, his voice was cold.

“do you know what he’s been doing during those years?”

your brows furrowed. “no, i-”

“killing. my. men.”

you didn’t even have time to process his words because he leaned forward when he said them, the gun uncomfortably close to your face. 

you swallowed the lump in your throat. “...are you sure you have the right person?”

his smirk widened into something eerie. “i have a gun pointed to you, don’t i?”

your pulse quickened. you couldn’t decide which was worse: the possibility that he was telling the truth or the fact that he was clearly enjoying your reaction.

“i always wanted to get back at that pig..” he held the gun up to the bottom of your chin, forcing you to meet his eyes. “and look at how kind the world is- blessing me with his daughter.”

you struggled to breathe, to think. the handcuffs dug into your wrist as you unconsciously tried to break out of them, a clink against the metal arm of the chair.

your voice trembled. “..what do you want from me?”

hongjoong didn’t answer immediately. instead, he leaned in even closer, so close that you could feel your foreheads touching.

“what i want,” he said slowly, eyes locked onto yours. “is for your dad to suffer.”

HOUR 6 OF 7 - SURPRISINGLY ALIVE

the stuffiness of the plane did little to calm your nerves. you sat quietly in the seat, staring at the shattered remains of your phone on the floor.

hongjoong snatched it from your hands a few minutes ago, grumbling about how ‘you don’t need devices’. great. just great. 

the sound of the cockpit door creaking open drew your attention. the other guy - or ‘pilot’, stepped out, adjusting the cuffs of his sleeves. “boss.”

hongjoong raised an eyebrow. “what?”

the ‘pilot’ moved closer to hongjoong, lowering his voice. “air traffic control was notified of our path,” he said quietly. “they know something’s off with the plane, but i have no idea how.”

hongjoong’s eyes darkened as he processed the information. then, he glared at you, like he was accusing you.

you scoffed. “you shot my phone, how would i even contact anyone?”

for a moment, the two of you locked eyes and you swear that you could see him debating whether to believe you.

the ‘pilot’ cleared his throat. “what should we expect?” he asked nervously.

hongjoong leaned back in his seat, running a hand through his hair. “the police.”

HOUR 7 OF 7 - SHIT IS GETTING REAL

“what the hell…” you whispered to yourself as you peered out of the window.

SWAT teams and federal agents stood in rows, their weapons pointed directly at the plane. flashing lights of red and blue lit up the empty airport. 

you turned away from the window, watching hongjoong pull out a burner phone from his jacket. his fingers typed something out before he suddenly snapped the phone in half, tossing the remains on the floor. 

“…who are you?” you asked quietly.

he raised an eyebrow. “you don’t need to know, pretty.”

your survival instincts told you to move, to do something. but the second you tried to stand, hongjoong shoved you back down. 

“stay seated until we land,” he said before tilting his head. “isn’t that your job?”

you rolled your eyes, gripping the armrests as you tried to calm yourself down and steady your breathing. 

but that was when you heard it - gunshots. 

“they’re shooting us?” you panicked, flinching with each sound. 

no answer.

“hey-“ you tried again, but was cut off by the tires hitting the terrain. 

the landing was rough - harsher than anything you’ve experienced as a flight attendant. the plane rattled like never before.

your chest tightened when it rolled over something particularly large. “what was that?” your voice cracked. 

no answer. 

when the plane finally came to a halt, you barely had time to catch your breath when hongjoong moved. in a blink, he uncuffed you from the chair, only to secure the handcuffs on your wrists once more. 

he brought you to your feet, pulling you so close that you could feel his breath against your ear. “don’t do anything stupid,” he hissed. 

the cockpit door opened and the ‘pilot’ appeared. he quickly unlocked the emergency exit and you saw the makeshift ramp that had been attached to the side of the plane. 

a van rested just outside of it, hongjoong dragging you towards the vehicle. you descended the ramp, the cool air hitting your face as you looked around. 

but that was when you saw it. 

blood. 

on the wheels of the plane, the dark colour leaving a fresh trail on the ground.  

“did you..” you gulped, your voice barely above a whisper. “did you run over them?”

hongjoong glanced at you. “i didn’t,” he shrugged. “the plane did.”

you stopped in your tracks, your feet stuck rooted to the ground as you stared at him in horror. how could he say that like it was no big deal? just who was this man?

“move,” hongjoong ordered. but when you didn’t, he clicked his tongue, rolling his eyes. “god- you’re such a brat.”

before you knew it, you were shoved into the back of the van. the ‘pilot’ closed the door with a loud slam and sat in the driver’s seat while hongjoong took the passenger’s seat up front. 

you met hongjoong’s eyes through the rearview mirror. his glare was sharp, acting as a warning to keep your mouth shut. you didn’t need to be told twice.

the van drove forward and you caught glimpses of city lights in the distance, slowly growing closer. civilisation - maybe you could get help. 

but against your mind’s wishes, you felt your eyelids getting heavy - and you did something that no one should ever do when they’re in a car with armed strangers.

you fell asleep.

HOUR 14 OF 7 - HIP HIP HOORAY YOU’RE NOT DEAD

you heard a voice whine. “why can’t we kill her?” 

“do you want boss to kill us?” you heard another reply.

your eyes fluttered open. your head felt heavy as the room came into focus, your stomach twisting. 

the space was dingy, poorly lit by a bulb hanging from the ceiling and an unnecessarily tall lamp on the ground. the walls were stained and the air stunk of blood.

you tried to move, only to feel tight ropes against your wrists and ankles. you were tied to a chair.

“i can’t believe we have to babysit the pig’s daughter,” a man with a knife groaned.

“calm down, wooyoung,” the other one sighed.

“calm down?!” wooyoung exclaimed. “yeosang got to fly a plane! how is that fair?”

“he has a license,” the second man rolled his eyes. 

“it’s still a plane, jongho-”

“shut up,” jongho interrupted. “the girl’s awake.”

both men turned their heads to look at you, the sudden attention sending a shiver down your spine. wooyoung’s grin stretched across his face as he got to his feet, jongho following behind.

“aw look who’s finally awake,” wooyoung approached, his voice childish. “you slept like a baby- and we didn’t even drug you!”

your heartbeat quickened as he leaned in close, his grin widening as he studied your face.

“i read your file,” he began. “you’re smart…” wooyoung paused, his eyes inspecting you and your ridiculous uniform. “and hot.”

your throat tightened, but you forced yourself to respond. “thank you-?”

“-what’s your favourite feature about yourself?” he asked, twirling the knife in his hands.

“uh-” your mind scrambled for an answer as he got nearer, the knife glinting. “i- my eyes?”

“your eyes,” wooyoung repeated, the grin stuck to his face. “good choice.”

he brought the knife closer, the cold steel trailing down the side of your face. you flinched as the blade hovered near your eye, your breath hitching.

“you’re going to answer all our questions,” he stated, almost in a sing-songy way. “and if you dont-”

he tilted the knife, now directly above your eyeball. “-i’ll dig those lovely pearls out of your sockets.”

your chest tightened, terror paralyzing you from head to toe. you couldn’t even breathe, every cell in your body pleading you to stay still.

“hey-” jongho tapped wooyoung on the shoulder, whispering. “uh.. boss said we can’t scratch her..”

“are you serious?” wooyoung scoffed. “then what’s the point?”

jongho bit the inside of his cheek, avoiding eye contact with his friend.

wooyoung groaned, throwing the knife to the ground with a strength that made it bend. “fuck this- torture isn’t even fun anymore.”

he stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

silence was in the air until jongho cleared his throat awkwardly. he turned to face you. “uh..” he hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“change of plans.”

HOUR 15 OF 7 - DAY DRINKING IS FUN

you never imagined yourself in a hideout, drinking vodka with one of your captors - yet here you were. 

the whole thing felt absurd: a shaky barstool beneath you and a scuffed counter separating you and jongho. he poured you a shot he claimed was ‘very expensive’, before proceeding to chug most of the vodka from the bottle in a long gulp. 

your legs were untied now, though your wrists were still bound, the rope loose enough for your hands to rest infront of you. “what are we waiting for?” you asked. “hongjoong?”

jongho froze, his eyes snapping to yours. “don’t say his name,” he whisper-shouted.

you raised your tied wrists in apology. “okay.. what should i call him?”

“call him boss.. or mr kim.. or anything that isn’t his first name,” jongho said, his words rushed. 

you nodded slowly, looking at the man infront of you with mild concern. he looked even more scared than you did. 

then suddenly, the door slammed open. 

both you and jongho flinched, watching two figures stumble in. 

the first was a tall man - storming into the room. the second was him, hongjoong, clutching his side in pain.

“mingi- boss!” jongho panicked instantly as he ran to help the injured man. “holy- you’re hurt!”

“the pig called for backup,” mingi sighed heavily. 

you blinked, stunned as the sound of hongjoong coughing violently brought your attention back to the injured man. 

blood seeped through his fingers, staining his sleeves and skin. you don’t know what took over you, but you pushed yourself off of the barstool and rushed towards him. 

“what do you think you’re doing?” mingi stepped infront of hongjooong, his hand resting on his gun protectively. 

you glared at him. “do you want your boss to bleed out?”

mingi studied you. after what felt like ages, he exhaled sharply and stepped aside. “fine,” he muttered, keeping a hand on his weapon. 

you knelt next to hongjoong, trying to make him face you as you grabbed his arm. though, he snatched himself away from you quickly. 

you rolled your eyes. “i’m trying to help you. let me see it.”

hongjoong’s eyes pierced your soul. you could see the cogs in his head turning on whether he could trust you. 

a few moments passed before he finally faced you with a sigh, revealing a large gash on the side of his stomach - a wound created by knife. 

“i need water.” 

jongho blinked, clearly thrown off. “what?”

“to clean his wound..?” you explained. “get me water. now.”

jongho hesitated before snatching a bottle of water from a mini fridge. he pushed it to you, the little amount of liquid sloshing inside. “you should stay still for this,” you said before slowly pouring the water over the wound. 

crap- a gash this big needed a stitch. 

“untie me,” you said, holding your wrists up to your captors. 

jongho glanced at his boss worriedly for permission. hongjoong gave a small nod and jongho quickly pulled out a small knife to cut the rope. 

once free, you quickly looked around for something to stitch his wound with. when nothing looked remotely useful, your eyes dropped to your uniform - a skirt with a yarn trim. it wasn’t ideal, but it would have to do.

you began to unravel the yarn from the hem.

“what are you doing?” mingi asked, frowning.

“stitching him,” you sighed as your fingers worked hurriedly. “or do you want him to get an infection?”

hongjoong let out a groan, shifting uncomfortably. “just hurry.”

you finished unravelling it, but now you needed a needle. your hand instinctively reached up to your hair - pulling out a small bobby pin. it was definitely not as sharp as a needle, but you’re sure that hongjoong can handle his pain.

“shit- i need to sterilise this,” you muttered, mostly to yourself.

“vodka,” jongho said instantly, grabbing the bottle and handing it to you.

you poured the small amount over the pin, letting it drip onto the floor. then, threading the yarn through the makeshift needle, you glanced at hongjoong.

“this will hurt,” you warned.

he looked at you with clenched teeth. “i don’t care.”

you placed a hand on his side to steady him, feeling the tension in his muscles as he tried to not flinch. carefully, you began to stitch the gash, each pull making him wince. 

when the stitching was complete, you tied the yarn and tore it off with your teeth - but the wound was still bleeding slightly.

you glanced down at your sleeves. without hesitation, you tore a strip of fabric free. you used it to dab away the excess blood, then folded the remaining fabric to wrap it around his side. 

“that should work. for now,” you sat back as you wiped your forehead with your arm.

“...you know how to treat people?” hongjoong asked, wincing slightly. 

you nodded slowly. “yeah.. i know the basics.”

“hm,” he tilted his head. “you’re more useful than i thought.”

you blinked. was a good thing or a bad thing?

“wooyoung,” he yelled out. 

a loud crash was heard in another room, followed by the muffled sounds of frantic movements. within seconds, wooyoung appeared in the doorway. 

“yes, boss?” wooyoung said out of breath, brushing off his shirt as he looked around the room. 

hongjoong didn’t respond immediately. instead, he looked you up and down, his lips twitching into what seemed like a smirk. “get her some actual clothes. we have an event to catch.”

HOUR 17 OF 7 - WORDS TALK BUT GUNS TALK LOUDER

“woah..” your eyes took in the building before you. glittering lights and an impressive exterior that was way more extravagant than anything you imagined hongjoong to be involved in.

he parked the car, the engine coming to a stop. before you could say anything, hongjoong stepped out of the car, closing the door shut. you scrambled to follow him, your heels clicking against the pavement as you caught up.

the two of you approached the man stationed at the door - a bouncer with a pen and clipboard.

without warning, hongjoong’s hand snaked around your waist, pulling you snugly against his side. you flinched at the sudden contact, but with how tight his grip was, there was no room for protests.

“ah, mr kim,” the bouncer greeted. “you made it.”

hongjoong offered a brief, fake smile before dropping it immediately. “let us in.”

“hold on now,” the bouncer said, flipping through the papers on the clipboard. “we can’t let her inside.”

hongjoong’s brows furrowed. “why?”

“new policy,” the man sighed, pretending to sound disappointed. “no more plus-ones.”

hongjoong rolled his eyes, not bothering to respond. instead, he reached into his blazer, about to pull out a-

“nevermind!” the bouncer’s face turned pale. he stepped aside with a nervous laugh. “you’re all set- enjoy the night.”

the interior was breathtaking - chandeliers hung from high ceilings and round tables were scattered across the venue, draped in pristine white table cloths. 

“don’t eat or drink anything here.”

you blinked, nodding slowly at hongjoong’s words. “okay.. but why-”

“-and if you really want to stay alive,” he interrupted, his lips brushing your ear. “don't leave my sight.”

his voice sent a chill down your spine. “okay,” you mumbled as he brought you further into the room.

he led you to a seating area - though it looked more like a conversation pit, where an old man sat waiting. 

hongjoong released his grip on you to sit across the man, gesturing for you to follow. you hesitated briefly before settling next to him.

“mr kim,” the old man greeted gruffly. his eyes shifted to you, studying your face. “i see you brought someone.”

hongjoong gave a nod, glancing at you. “introduce yourself, brat.”

“oh uh-” you put out your hand reluctantly, forcing a polite smile. “i’m ‘____’.”

the old man’s eyes narrowed before they widened in realisation. “her father-“

“-i’m glad you noticed,” hongjoong cut in. he slowly reached into his blazer again, but this time, he actually pulled out his pistol. 

your eyes widened as he aimed it to your waist, the cold metal brushing your side. “wha-“

“w-what are you doing?” the old man’s face drained of colour, panic flashing in his eyes. 

hongjoong tilted his head. “let’s negotiate.”

“mr kim-“ the old man began, his voice cracking. “as his friend, you do understand that i have to tell him she’s here.”

“do it,” hongjoong shrugged, leaning back. his arm returned to your waist, pulling you to him as he tapped the gun against your side. 

“let’s see if he values his money more than his own daughter.”

HOUR 18 OF 7 - LIFE ISN’T FAIR

a loud crash echoed through the venue, making you jump. the sound of heavy footsteps grew violent with every second.

hongjoong’s hand tightened around your waist as he stood, dragging you up with him. “move.”

“wait-!” the old man called after you, but hongjoong didn’t stop.

his grip on you was firm, the barrel of his gun pressing against your stomach. you tripped over your feet, struggling to keep up his pace.

“where are you taking me?” you panicked as you glanced over your shoulder at the armed men closing in.

“to your father, princess,” he sneered, his voice mockingly sweet. 

“mr kim! stop right there!” 

you froze, whipping your head around. standing at the far end of the room, infront of a small army of armed men, was your father. 

“let go of my daughter,” your father ordered. he pointed a gun directly at hongjoong, his men following suit. 

your eyes glanced around the room - seeing guests cowering against the walls, some injured and others dead.

“i’m not giving up the brat until i get what i want,” hongjoong demanded.

“what you want is an impossible amount of money!” your father yelled, his grip on his gun tightening.

“impossible?” hongjoong’s eyes widened with craze. “you have more than $500 million tied to your name! did you think i’ll forget who you killed to get here?”

your blood ran cold. “dad.. you killed people?” you asked, your voice trembling as you looked at him.

for a split second, your father’s eyes softened, though that quickly disappeared with a scoff.

“if i didn’t, you wouldn’t have a roof over your head,” your father spat. “you were too stubborn to do anything after you dropped med school.”

the world seemed to tilt, your father’s words more piercing than any bullet. “but i didn’t-”

“-you did,” your father interrupted you. “i spent all that money bribing them just for you to fuck up.”

your heart sank as tears welled in your eyes. hongjoong noticed your reaction, his grip on the gun loosening slightly. 

“i’d appreciate it if you didn’t make my hostage cry,” he said. “do you really want those to be your last words to her?”

“shut up,” your father snarled, his finger close to the trigger. “i’ll say what i want. she’s too stupid to argue back anyway.”

the tears you held back spilled over and all you could hear was your dad shouting, “get her!”

HOUR 18.5 OF 7 - THEY WANT YOU SOO BAD

gunshots were heard in every direction, completely deafening. 

the pungent smell of gunpowder burned your nose as you stumbled, your legs barely holding you up. hongjoong shoved you to the ground, his hand against your back. 

“stay down,” he ordered you, raising his gun and firing without hesitation.

you flinched with every shot, watching in horror as armed men fell one by one with his aim. the world felt like it was spinning too fast and you could barely keep up.

suddenly, a hand grabbed your arm.

“stop moving!” your father yelled, his grip painful as he dragged you towards the exit.

“no!” you choked out, your heels digging into the floor in an attempt to resist. panic ran through your veins as your eyes darted around desperately.

your eyes landed on a fallen gun near your feet. you quickly snatched it, hands trembling as you tried to point it towards him.

“don’t make me do this!” you cried.

your father didn’t stop and without thinking-

-you pulled the trigger.

a bang was heard, followed by his rough scream as he collapsed to the floor, clutching his bleeding thigh.

“oh my god,” you whispered, the gun slipping from your hands as tears flowed uncontrollably down your cheeks. you sank to the floor, staring at the blood pouring out of him.

“you bitch!” he shouted in pain.

out of the corner of your eye, you caught hongjoong watching you, something strange flashing across his face. was that.. surprise? pride? maybe he was impressed?

hongjoong fired a shot at an armed man without looking, moving to you quickly. 

“didn’t think you had it in you, pretty,” he looked over his shoulder. “but we need to leave.”

he led you to a small janitor’s closet near the exit. the narrow space smelled of bleach, but at least it was quiet.

hongjoong shut the door behind you and dusted off his blazer. without a word, his dark eyes inspected you, checking your shoulders and arms.

you stood motionless, too shocked to stop him as he gently tilted your chin up, his thumb wiping away the mascara-stained tears from your cheeks.

“nothing broken,” he muttered, more to himself than to you. “no scars either..”

he pulled out a burner phone, typing something quickly.

“i- i just shot my dad,” your shoulders shook as new tears welled up in your eyes.

hongjoong glanced up from the phone, meeting your eyes. “..are you bragging?” he asked bluntly.

“what? he’s my dad-”

“-and he’s a dick,” hongjoong cut you off. “you might share blood, but that man clearly hates you.”

you hiccuped, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand. “...am i going to hell?”

hongjoong scoffed. “come on-“ he began, but stopped himself when he looked at you and the tears spilling from your eyes. “you didn’t kill him… you’re fine.” 

you opened your mouth to protest but he silenced you as he continued typing. “and even if you did,” he added. “you’re doing the world a favour.”

he smashed the burner phone onto the ground, discarding the pieces. he reloaded his pistol before turning back to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders as he led you through bodies and debris.

outside, a black van waited by the curb. hongjoong pushed you inside before climbing in after you, slamming the door shut behind him.

“drive,” he ordered.

as the street lights went past you, you slumped in your seat, completely exhausted. “where are we going?” you asked softly.

hongjoong studied you for a moment, watching your eyelids go heavy. “...go to sleep, brat.”

DAY 2 - OH HONEY I'M HOME

you woke up with a jolt. you sat up from the couch you laid down on, completely disoriented. your eyes darted around the dimly lit room. the hideout. 

relief and fear spread within you. you were safe - for now.

just then, a knock from the doorway made you jump. “didn’t mean to scare you,” a man said, leaning against the frame. “boss wanted me to check on you.”

you blinked. “i- okay,” you coughed to clear your throat, wincing at how dry it felt.

“i’ll let him know you’re awake.”

and with that, he disappeared down the hall, leaving you alone once more.

though that didn’t last long. moments later, hongjoong entered. he carried a stool over, setting it down across from you before sitting. 

“how long did i sleep?” you asked hoarsely.

“a day,” he replied with a shrug.

your eyes widened. it was only then you noticed your attire - a baggy t-shirt replacing the outfit you were wearing before.

“who changed me?” you blurted out, heat rising to your cheeks.

“i did,” hongjoong answered. he noticed your flustered expression, tilting his head. “what?”

“did you-” you cleared your throat. “did you see anything?”

“i’m not a pervert,” he scoffed. “if it makes you feel better, you were changed in the dark.”

you fell into an awkward, heavy silence as you sat across each other. for the first time, there was no danger, no gunfire or anyone yelling out orders. just silence.

“your dad..” hongjoong began, speaking up. “wants you dead.”

“...what?”

he held up a cassette tape, tossing it onto the table between you, your hands trembling as you picked it up. hongjoong then brought out a cassette tape player, allowing you to hear your father’s voice.

‘mr kim, we’ve had our ups and downs, but i’m sure that we can agree on one thing - that bitch who shot my thigh is a liability. an idiot that made it this far because of me. she’s no longer my responsibility or family, so expect to find her head on a stick when you turn your back. have fun.’

“what the fuck..” you whispered shakily as it came to an end. 

“to be honest, your only purpose was to be a hostage.” hongjoong’s fingers drummed the edge of the stool. “and now that he doesn’t want you.. you’re useless-”

the world around you crumbled, his words making you feel worse. 

“-to him.”

your eyes widened, looking at him in confusion.

“you’re smart,” he shrugged. “and you stitched me.”

you blinked. “…where are you going with this?” 

“i want you to be an addition to my team,” he replied.

“do i have to kill people?” you blurted out. “or steal, or-”

“no,” hongjoong raised a hand to cut you off. “all you’ll be doing is treating my injured men. quite the opposite of killing.”

you frowned, furrowing your eyebrows. “why would you trust me with that?”

“because,” he said, leaning forward. “you have nowhere else to go.”

“that’s not true-”

“really?” hongjoong smirked. “do you know how many businesses your dad owns?”

you shook your head.

“more than 80% in the country,” his eyes sparkled with something dark. “now that you’ve shot him, you’ve burnt every bridge he’s built for you.”

your jaw dropped. “but-”

“no job, no family, nowhere to live either since he owns most of the real estate here.”

you stared at him, struggling to process his words.

“here’s my offer,” hongjoong continued. “you get a decent amount of money, a place to live and protection...”

“...just to treat people?” you asked in disbelief.

he nodded. 

you bit your lip, staring at the floor as you picked at your nails. how could your dad do this to you? abandoning you just like that? and now he wanted you dead? you could feel yourself getting angry just thinking about him.

after a long moment, you lifted your head, meeting his gaze. “deal.” 

MONTH 1 - FAMILY BONDING 

that evening, you sat on the floor with san, wooyoung and yeosang, eating a batch of cheap instant noodles. it was a little awkward - mostly because you just joined, but you were silently appreciating their efforts to make small talk with you. 

suddenly, a loud bang was heard through the hideout. the three men jumped up immediately, pulling guns and knives from who knows where. 

“back entrance?” wooyoung asked as he sharpened his knives. 

your heart raced as you watched the three of them shift into combat mode - and you caught yourself lagging behind. you hurriedly stood up and grabbed the medical kit you kept close. 

“stay here,” san said firmly. 

you shook your head. “if someone’s injured, i’m coming.”

the three of them shared a look before yeosang gave you a reluctant nod. “…just stay behind us. we’ll get in trouble if you get hurt.”

they moved swiftly and silently through the narrow halls of the hideout, weapons in hand. you trailed closely, your heart pounding as you gripped the medical kit tightly. 

when you reached the back entrance, san motioned you to stay back while they checked the door. 

the signs of forced entry were obvious - the lock was broken and scuff marks lined the floor. 

wooyoung scoffed, speaking under his breath. “stupid piglets.”

yeosang sighed. “looks like they took a few weapons and left.”

“are they testing us?” san asked, inspecting a footprint on the ground. 

before anyone could respond, the door slammed open making all of you jump. you turned to see mingi, his chest heaving as he leaned against the door frame. 

“meeting. now.”

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

the hideout’s ‘meeting room’ was more of a cramped closet with mismatched chairs and a comically large table in the middle. hongjoong paced at the end of the room, his jaw clenched. 

“we can’t stay here any longer,” he began. “it’s only a matter of time before they come back in full force.”

hongjoong stopped pacing and crossed his arms. “we need to move back to our old apartments. they’re scattered enough to keep us hidden until we figure out our next move.”

you shifted uncomfortably. 

hongjoong noticed this. “what?” he asked, his sharp eyes landing on you. 

“i uh-“ you hesitated. “i don’t have a home..” you said sheepishly. 

hongjoong raised an eyebrow. 

“my dad owns the house,” you admitted. “and that’s not really an option anymore.”

“right,” hongjoong sighed, running a hand through his hair. “shit..”

“alright, who has space?” he clapped, glancing around the room. 

everyone exchanged uneasy looks. 

“we don’t,” yeosang said, gesturing to himself, san, wooyoung and jongho. “the four of us are already crammed into one place.”

“same here,” yunho spoke up. “mingi and i barely fit in ours.”

hongjoong turned to seonghwa, his face hopeful. 

“no,” seonghwa said without hesitation. 

a heavy sigh escaped hongjoong as he pinched the bridge of his nose. he leaned against the table, deep in thought. 

minutes stretched into what felt like hours before hongjoong finally spoke up. “you’re coming with me,” he said, looking directly at you. 

your eyes widened in surprise. “..what?”

“you’re staying at my place.”

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

the car sped down the (somewhat) empty highway, the faint smell of vanilla from the air freshener mixing with the lingering scent of old fast food. 

you gripped the edge of your seat as the streetlights ran by the window in a blur. “are we in a rush?” you nervously glanced at hongjoong. 

“no,” he replied flatly. 

there was a black car beside you that had been keeping pace for the past few minutes - and just as you shifted in your seat, it suddenly swerved infront of your car and slammed the brakes. 

“what the-” you barely managed to say before the impact. the car jolted violently as it hit the one ahead, the sound of metal crunching loud. 

hongjoong let out a low string of curses under his breath. his face was weirdly calm as he unbuckled his seatbelt, stepping out of the car without a word. 

“wait-” you scrambled to undo your own seatbelt. 

from your seat, you saw him approaching the car. the moment he glanced inside, his eyes widened. he reached for his gun and pulled the trigger instantly. 

the loud gunshot made you flinch and your stomach twisted as you saw the slumped figure in the driver’s seat, blood splattered across the windshield. 

your heart pounded as you stumbled out of the car, rushing towards him. “why did you do that?!”

hongjoong turned to you, his jaw clenched. “it was a piglet.”

“wha-“ your eyes drifted to the body, a shiver going down your spine as you saw the bullet hole clean through the skull. 

hongjoong, completely unfazed, went back to the car. you stared at the lifeless body for a moment longer before hurriedly following him. 

once you were back inside, you swallowed the lump in your throat, attempting to break the suffocating silence. “….how did you know he was a piglet?”

hongjoong didn’t respond immediately. his fingers flexed against the steering wheel as he glanced at you. 

“they have a bullet tattoo..” he said finally, pulling down his collar to point to his collarbone. “..right here.”

you blinked. “oh.”

“if you ever come across one,” he continued. “kill them on sight.”

your eyes widened, your throat tightening. “what about the police?”

he fell silent for a second, his eyes fixed on the road. then, a faint smirk crossed his face. “you don’t need to worry about them.”

his answer left you unsettled, but before you could question him further, the apartment building came into view. it was modern - standing tall with the city skyline. 

hongjoong smoothly pulled into the parking lot. the abruptness of the stop sent you forward, but his hand shot out instinctively, pressing against you to keep you steady. 

“sorry,” he muttered, his voice soft - though he didn’t look at you as he retracted his arm. 

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

some might describe hongjoong’s apartment as ‘minimalistic’, but to you, it’s just an excuse for a grown man to avoid decorating. 

the walls were devoid of any art or family photos, the kitchen was spotless - though it was definitely untouched with how there was almost no food in the fridge. and from what you saw, the only source of entertainment was a lone TV. 

“do you..” you began, looking around the bare space. “do you even live here?”

hongjoong ignored your comment and walked towards the big couch and began to pull it into a makeshift bed. the springs creaked slightly as he unfolded it. “this is where you’ll be sleeping,” he said, dusting himself off. 

“cool.”

“don’t complain-“ he stopped himself mid-sentence and narrowed his eyes when he realised what you said. “wait, you’re okay with this?”

you blinked. “…yeah?”

“hm,” he said, slightly surprised. he looked you up and down before turning to the long hallway. “get some rest, we’re getting you a phone tomorrow.”

MONTH 2 - LIVE LAUGH LOVE GUNS

you should’ve known it wouldn’t be long before the piglets attacked you again. 

hongjoong sent you on a simple supply run - nothing unusual. but as you stood in the small pharmacy, you felt the air shift when the cashier’s demeanour turned cold. 

it all happened so fast. 

the moment you saw the gun aimed at your chest, your eyes fell to the faint outline of a bullet tattoo peeking out from his collarbone. great. 

your breath hitched as your body moved on impulse. you barely avoided the first shot as you ducked behind the display rack. 

the pharmacy was strangely empty, no one else to intervene. your heart pounded as the sounds of footsteps and gunshots echoed. 

fumbling with your phone, you dialed every number you could think of. yet, no one answered. 

your hands trembled as you typed hongjoong’s number, your last resort. 

he picked up after one ring. 

“this better be important, brat,” he grumbled, groggy like he just woke up. 

“i need help-” you semi-yelled as you narrowly dodged another shot, darting behind the counter. “i’m getting attacked-”

“-send your location,” hongjoong interrupted. “i’m on my way.”

the line went dead before you could respond. 

you sent your location and shoved the phone back into your pocket. the cashier reloaded the gun, his footsteps growing louder. and just as you moved, he charged. 

he grabbed you, trying to pin you down. you barely managed to fight back, until you made an educated attack - kicking him in the groin. 

he groaned, stumbling back. you took the opportunity to snatch the gun from his hands. 

you pointed it at him, your hands shaking. “stay back,” your voice cracked. 

the man scoffed. “over my dead body,” he lunged at you again. 

your finger moved instinctively, pulling the trigger. 

once. 

twice. 

again and again and again. 

the sound of gunfire rang in your ears, the recoil sending waves through your arms. you didn’t stop until you heard a clicking noise that meant that the gun was empty. 

when you opened your eyes, he was no longer standing. 

you looked down, the cashier laying sprawled on the ground, the concrete dark with blood. bullet holes littered his body, evidence of your frantic shots. 

you dropped to your knees, your chest heaving. you reached out to check his pulse. nothing.

you just took someone’s life. 

your eyes fell to your hands, bloody and shaking. from young, you always wanted to save lives - not take them. tears fell from your eyes, blurring your vision. 

the door slammed open. 

hongjoong stood in the doorway. he took in the body on the floor and your frozen form in a single glance. he sighed, stepping in. 

“come on, let’s go,” he crouched to grab your arm. 

you couldn’t move, your eyes fixed on the lifeless body. 

“hey,” his fingers gripped your jaw, tilting your face to meet his. his eyes were intense, his touch warm against your cold skin. “we need to leave before more show up. you don’t want to kill anyone else, do you?”

you shook your head quickly. 

he pulled you to your feet, wrapping his arm around yours as he guided you to his car. the ride back was silent as you stared out of the window. 

and before you knew it, you were back at his apartment. 

you hesitated at the door, unable to bring yourself to step inside. 

hongjoong sighed, grabbing your wrist as he tugged you in. he tossed his gun and his keys in the kitchen counter before turning to you. 

“go take a long shower. i’ll be in the living room.”

you nodded, moving to the bathroom in a daze. 

the water was scalding as it hit your skin. no amount of soap or scrubbing would ever make you feel clean from the bloodied-stains. every part of your body felt foreign - even your puffy eyes and lips.

once you were done, you dressed in the softest clothes you had, hoping that it would provide you with some form of comfort (it didn’t).

the pull-out couch was prepared with brand-new pillows and fluffy blankets when you returned to the living room. hongjoong sat on the edge, gesturing for you to sit. you sank down beside him. 

the silence stretched on until it became unbearable. 

you spoke up, your voice barely audible. “…i killed someone.”

“you did,” he nodded. “good job.”

your head snapped up, your eyes wide. “i killed someone.”

“and so have i,” hongjoong leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. “does that bother you?”

“i…”

he leaned back. “it should. the first time always does.”

“i don’t think i can do this,” you breathed out shakily. “i don’t want to hurt people..”

the two of you locked eyes for what felt like ages. you could see hongjoong’s adam's apple bob up and down, his jaw tightening slightly. “no one wants to hurt people,” he replied softly. 

you blinked. 

“i shouldn’t have sent you out alone, especially with your dad targeting you,” he sighed. “that’s on me.”

“but-”

“-though i do have to say, this made me realise how.. unprepared you are,” he continued.

your eyebrows furrowed. 

“if you want to survive, you need to know how to defend yourself,” he drummed his fingers against the couch. “...you’re off supply runs. from now on, you’re training with the others.”

you stared at him. “what?”

“the rest have some ‘schedule’ for training. i’m sure you can join without any problems.”

you hesitated. the thought of the blood, the body, the gun in your hands made you nauseous. the idea of training scared you. 

he noticed this, his eyes softening slightly. “you won’t be a killer, just someone capable of self-defense.”

you swallowed the lump in your throat. finally, you nodded, your voice small. “okay.”

MONTH 3 - LET’S GO GAMBLING!

the casino was glitzy and loud with copyright-free music, its neon lights casting eerie shadows on the dark streets outside. 

“you three, cover left. you two, check the vault. the rest of you will stay near the exit,” hongjoong ordered.

you waited for your assignment, expecting to be grouped with someone. instead, hongjoong said, “you’re with me.”

you sighed. “alright.”

you followed hongjoong to the right side of the casino, the sounds of laughter and clinking glasses filling the space. he moved silently, keeping his gun concealed but ready. you tried to mimic his focus, clutching the knife wooyoung lent you earlier.

the first sign of trouble came when the alarms blared.

armed men swarmed into the casino. piglets.

hongjoong moved first, taking them down in a single shot. you ducked behind a pillar, your heart pounding.

the fight moved fast. hongjoong was precise - he wasn’t even touchable, killing the men easily.

but that was when you saw it before he did: a piglet creeping up behind him, raising and aiming the gun to his head.

“boss!”

without hesitation, you hurled wooyoung’s knife to the piglet.

the knife pierced and plunged into his neck, causing the man to fall, his gun clattering to the ground. 

hongjoong whipped his head around with wide eyes, shooting the man infront of him before spinning to kill the piglet you just hit.

the silence that followed was deafening.

hongjoong’s breathing was heavy as he lowered his weapon. he dusted his clothes off, looking at you with an unreadable expression.

he gulped, finally speaking up. “...good job, pretty.” 

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

slowly, everyone regrouped in the corner, collapsing onto the floor in a circle. bottles of water were passed around as everyone caught their breaths.

for a while, no one spoke, the only sounds being an occasional groan.

“hey,” wooyoung hiccuped, breaking the silence as he turned to you. “give me my knife back.”

you looked at him awkwardly before handing him his completely bloody and dented knife - basically ruined.

“what the hell!” he exclaimed. “that was one of my favourites!”

you shrugged. “you shouldn’t have given it to me then.”

“i didn’t know you were actually gonna use it,” wooyoung complained. “i thought you would just watch.”

“you’re such a dick,” you rolled your eyes.

wooyoung leaned in closer - his voice annoyingly sweet. “aw, don’t be mad, sweetheart. i’ll get you a better knife- one that won’t bend in your delicate fucking hands.”

“shut up,” you groaned, shoving him lightly as the others chuckled.

hongjoong leaned against the wall, his arm crossed over his chest. his eyes shifted from wooyoung to you. 

his chest tightened in a now-familiar way: you’re fitting in too well.

it wasn’t jealousy - at least, that’s what he told himself. it was about control. your presence was a distraction he didn’t account for. but the others took you in so easily, which was technically a good thing, right?

and yet...

why did his stomach twist every time one of them smiled at you?

hongjoong blinked, realising how his leg was bouncing restlessly. he forced himself to stop, sighing deeply.

“you good, boss?” yunho asked.

hongjoong paused. “...i’m fine.”

yunho raised an eyebrow but didn’t question it, turning away.

hongjoong’s eyes returned to you. you were leaning a little too close to yeosang now, laughing at some joke wooyoung said - sending a strange pang through his chest.

why did this bother him so much?

you weren’t doing anything wrong. you were building trust, meshing with the group - just like he expected.

but this wasn’t about the group, was it?

he frowned, thinking. you stitched him right after he kidnapped you, you saved him from getting shot even though you were definitely not ready to fight.

what has he ever done for you?

introduced you to a world of crime? to a world of killing, stealing and hatred? accidentally ruined the relationship between you and your dad?

hongjoong closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose.

shit.

���⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

without bothering to change, you sank into the pull-out couch - exhaustion pulling you to it like gravity.

you heard hongjoong locking the door behind him, the soft click sounding loud in the quiet apartment. his footsteps shuffled toward the kitchen, the sounds of cabinets opening and closing reaching your ears. you were way too tired to look.

you didn’t realise you drifted off until you were awoken by something heavy on your body.

your eyes fluttered open groggily. for a moment, you thought you were dreaming. hongjoong was in the middle of draping a large blanket on you.

“what are you doing?” you mumbled, your voice thick with sleep.

his eyes darted to yours briefly. “nothing.”

you frowned, shifting to sit up - but he placed a hand on your shoulder, pressing you gently back down. “sleep.”

you let out a quiet sigh. “shouldn’t you be sleeping?” you muttered.

he paused, his jaw tensing. “....tomorrow onwards, you’re training with me.”

you stared at him, stunned. before you could even say anything, he turned and walked away without a word.

…did your boss just tuck you in?

MONTH 3.5 -  PUNCH, KICK, SNARE

“again,” hongjoong said, slightly out of breath. 

the living room felt smaller than usual with the two of you moving around. the coffee table and couch was pushed aside, leaving just enough space to practice your punches without tripping over the furniture. he claimed training here would teach you how to ‘fight in tight quarters’.

he sighed. “your moves are sloppy.”

you groaned, shaking your aching wrists. “i’m trying.”

“that’s not enough when someone’s aiming a gun at your head,” he replied, stepping back and raising hands. “your punches are too weak and your balance is all over the place. reset your stance.”

you rolled your eyes but obeyed, repositioning your feet. it wasn’t the first time you’ve heard those words from him.

hongjoong moved closer, tapping your wrist. “keep your guard up. always.”

you threw another punch, but it barely made his hands move. he lowered them, sighing. “that’s not going to hurt anyone-“

“-i’m doing my best, okay?” you snapped. “i’m not a fast learner.”

his eyes softened for a moment before narrowing again. “that’s not an excuse when your life is on the line.”

you tsked. he was right of course, but that didn’t make it easier to hear.

“again.”

you tried once more, throwing a combination of punches that he blocked with ease. when you attempted a kick, you stumbled, nearly losing your footing.

he caught you instinctively, his hands steadying you.

“watch your balance,” he said automatically, going on a tangent on how training is important and blahblahblah. 

you tried to focus on your surroundings, on the words he was saying, but it was hard to ignore the proximity between you. the smell of his cologne mixed with the faint smell of sweat in the room. his touch wasn’t rough or aggressive like you’d expect - it was gentle.

your eyes drifted to his face, catching the faint scars along his cheekbones and jawline. were those always there? or was this the first time you really noticed?

his brows furrowed, likely in frustration at your lack of response, but the concern in his eyes snapped you back into reality, making you realise that you were staring the whole time.

“i don’t think i’m cut out for this,” the words spilled out before you could stop them.

hongjoong paused, his lips parting slightly - he wasn’t  expecting you to say that. for a moment, he was silent. he then leaned in, his eyes piercing. 

“you don’t get to quit.”

the intensity of his voice made you forget about the aches in your muscles and the sweat dripping down your back. his words weren’t angry - they were commanding. 

“why do you even care?” you whispered, barely audible.

his grip on your arms loosened slightly, his eyes searching yours for what felt like eternity. then out of nowhere, he stepped back, clearing his throat as he avoided your gaze. “take five,” he mumbled, walking to the kitchen.

MONTH 5 - BLOOD, BLOOD AND MORE BLOOD

the office building looked ordinary. if you didn’t know any better, you’d think it was just another corporate HQ. but you knew better.

and so did hongjoong.

you held up the new knife wooyoung gave you, one that wasn’t as pretty as the last. it was finally the day you ambushed your dad, the man that’s been wanting you dead for months.

you looked up to face hongjoong. “i don’t want to see it,” you said suddenly.

he raised an eyebrow. “see what?”

“when you kill him. my dad,” you clarified, your throat tightening. “i’m.. okay with it, but i don’t want to see it.”

his eyes studied you. after a moment, he nodded. “make sure to stay close to me,” he said before turning to the building.

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

the group slipped into the building through the side. hongjoong led the way, gripping his pistol tightly as you stayed close behind him.

“elevators are too risky,” hongjoong looked back at the group. “we’ll take the stairs.”

the group nodded, their weapons drawn as they moved quietly through the halls. the fluorescent lights did nothing to mask the sinister aura that was buried in the walls.

when you reached the stairwell, the sound of footsteps echoing above sent everyone into high alert.

the first shot rang out.

gunfire filled the stairwell. the air was thick with smoke and gunfire. you pressed yourself against the wall, trying to avoid all of the attacks happening around you. you tried to go in to fight but-

-someone grabbed you.

you struggled, twisting out of their grasp. but before you could scream, a hand clamped over your mouth, dragging you away. “stay still.”

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

the stench forced your eyes open - a horrid mix of stale cigar smoke and alcohol. the office was dimly lit and your father crouched infront of you, his face smug as he cornered you.

“you think you’re better than me, don’t you?” he sneered.

you glared at him, your heart pounding. “fuck off.”

a bitter laugh escaped his lips. “you’ve gotten worse since you joined that boy,” he spat. “should i cut off your tongue? unhinge your jaw? or maybe i’ll be basic and shoot you.”

“you’re insane,” your stomach twisted. “it’s hard to believe we’re related, especially with how ugly you are.”

“you-”

before he could finish, you jammed wooyoung’s knife into his other thigh, dragging it down to create a large gash. he let out a guttural scream, stumbling into a desk as blood gushed out of his thigh like a fountain.

you moved quickly, scrambling out of the corner, but two piglets grabbed you before you could get far.

“stupid bitch,” your father hissed, forcing himself up as he took out the knife in his thigh, looking directly at you. “you’re going to regret that.”

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

as hongjoong shot another piglet with his pistol, he looked around the haze, searching for a certain someone. “where’s ‘____’?” he asked.

the group stayed silent.

“shit- we don’t know,” wooyoung said nervously.

hongjoong’s face darkened - and without hesitation, he grabbed a nearby piglet by the collar, slamming him against the wall. “where’s your boss?” he snarled.

the piglet squirmed. “i- i have a family!”

hongjoong’s grip on his collar tightened, his eyes widening scarily. “then bring me to him.”

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

“your mother should’ve gotten the abortion,” your father said before settling down infront of you, the bloody knife close to your face.

“i’m surprised that a woman like her fucked you,” you breathed out shakily as the blade hit your skin. 

“shut up-“

the door burst open as the knife grazed your skin. hongjoong stepped in, his gun raised. “let go of her,” he ordered.

the piglets hesitated, glancing between your father and hongjoong. your father’s hand didn’t move, a scar forming on your face. 

“you want her that badly?” your father asked mockingly. “you’re becoming soft.”

hongjoong didn’t answer. instead, he moved faster than you thought was possible, shooting the two piglets that held you with ease.

the bodies hit the ground - causing your father to shove you harshly against the wall. pain shot through your body as you heard something crack.

hongjoong froze, his pistol trained on your dad. 

“stay back,” your father warned, hovering the blade near your temple.

hongjoong’s jaw clenched. he dropped his gun slightly, making your father relax.

but then hongjoong lunged.

the fight was brutal, all punches and grunts. you slumped against the wall, your cheek bleeding uncontrollably as every part of your body ached.

after what felt like ages, hongjoong finally gained the upper hand, pinning your dad down as he pointed the gun to his head. but then his eyes landed on yours, wide and terrified - making him freeze.

“shit,” he cursed under his breath, lowering the gun. he turned and rushed to you, pulling you into his arms.

your father tried to crawl away, but hongjoong didn’t let him go far. with you in his embrace, he covered your eyes and ears tightly as the sound of a singular gunshot echoed in the room.

you clung to him, your tears soaking into his shirt. his hand cradled the back of your head, his touch soft. “it’s over,” he whispered as you sobbed.

you shook your head against his chest, the salt in your tears stinging the cut on your cheek. “i almost died.”

“i know,” he said softly. “but i wouldn’t let that happen.”

his words settled over you like a warm blanket. you pulled back slightly, your eyes searching his face. you could feel the heat of his body as he kept you close.

hongjoong shifted, his hands moving to your shoulders as he looked at you carefully. his thumb brushed over your scar, wiping away the trail of blood on your face.

“you’re shaking,” his eyebrows furrowed. “you need to breathe.”

“i’m trying.”

he reached for a nearby chair and pulled it over, guiding you to sit. hongjoong crouched infront of you, your hands trembling in his.

“you’re safe,” his eyes locked onto yours. “i’ve got you.”

something inside you cracked at his words - and tears spilled once more. hongjoong didn’t say anything, but his presence was enough. he stayed crouched infront of you, letting you take all the time you needed.

when you finally looked up, there was something unspoken in his eyes - a mix of guilt and relief that made your heart ache. “...thank you,” you whispered.

his lips parted like he wanted to say something, but the words never came. instead, he nodded slowly, his grip on your hands tightening for a moment before letting go.

at that moment, you leaned forward, closing the small distance between you. your lips brushed against his, just enough to make his entire body stiffen.

for a second, you thought you made a mistake. his hands paused midair and his breathing hitched.

but then, he moved. to you. 

his hands cupped your face gently, pulling you closer into a kiss. it was slow at first, but when you gripped his shirt tightly - the feelings he’d been keeping were let loose.

his lips pressed against yours with urgency. his fingers tangled in your hair, holding you like you might disappear if he let go. 

you responded instinctively. your hands found his neck, his jaw - brushing over them softly in a way that made him groan. “fuck- you’re so pretty.”

the world around you spun in swirls of blood, smoke and cologne, overwhelming you in a way that made you lose your breath.

hongjoong broke away for a moment, panting slightly. his lips curled into a smirk, before he kissed you again, softer this time but no less intense. it was grounding, reassuring and impossibly warm.

when the two of you pulled back, his thumb traced your scar. “this..” he began quietly. “..this isn’t what i expected tonight.”

you let out a soft, shaky laugh. “me neither.”

he pecked your forehead as he stood up, his legs slightly wobbly from the kiss. hongjoong held out a hand, helping you to your feet. “...let’s go home.”

series taglist - @hanoishere @scuzmunkie @sinfullygay @arusio @midnightrebel1028 @neemaxx @seungminsrighthand @arilevenatz @ateezswonderland @beabatiny @lemirabitur @sunnyhokyu @frzzenfrxg @cylovesmg @txtsoobean @seonghwasslytherin @sundaybossanova @sweetinsaniiity @cybrnaya @choisanchwego @mrskill2

BONUS SCENE - MINE

the apartment was quiet as you laid on the pull-out couch, staring at the ceiling. sleep wasn’t coming - your mind was too busy replacing the events earlier.

the memory of hongjoong’s arms around you stayed, along with the feeling of his lips on yours. how could a man as dangerous as him bring you such comfort?

a soft knock against the wall broke the silence.

you sat up slowly, seeing hongjoong standing in the hallway. his hair was slightly damp and he wore a loose black hoodie, the sleeves pushed up to his elbows. he hesitated before walking to you, his movements weirdly awkward.

“...you okay?” you asked the nervous man.

he shrugged, trying to play it off as he sat next to you. “i’m fine. you?”

“i’ve been better.”

there was a pause as the two of you stared at each other, the silence heavy. finally, he cleared his throat, shifting uncomfortably.

“i’ve been thinking..” hongjoong trailed off.

“uh-oh.”

“i-it’s not a bad thing-” he said hurriedly. “it’s just that.. tonight made me think about a lot of things.”

you tilted your head, confused.

his voice softened as he continued. “but this isn’t just about tonight. it’s about.. everything. i don’t want you to feel.. unsafe all the time.”

“i don’t,” you said instantly, but you’re not sure how much you believed yourself.

he leaned back slightly, reaching into his hoodie pocket. when his hand reappeared, it was holding a pistol - his pistol.

“take this,” he held it out to you.

you blinked, staring at the weapon. “what? why?”

“because it’s mine,” he replied simply leaving no room for argument. “and now, it’s ours.”

you hesitated, your hand hovering over the gun. “i.. i barely know how to use this.”

“then i’ll teach you.”

you looked up at him, searching his face for answers. “...why are you giving this to me?”

you noticed the way his eyes darted down as you looked at him, his fingers tightening around the pistol as he pushed it to you. 

“because,” hongjoong began quietly. “i trust you.”

your fingers paused before finally closing around the gun. the cold metal felt deadly in your grasp, but the way his eyes lit up made your heart swell.

“you trust me..?” you asked softly, a faint smile on your face. “hongjoong..”

his usual composure faltered as you said his name, a blush dusting his face. he swallowed the lump in his throat, gathering himself. “you’re not just a part of the group,” he said. “you’re more than that. to me.”

your eyebrows shot up, completely stunned. “...i don’t know what to say.”

“say yes.”

you blinked. “yes to what?”

“to being mine,” hongjoong’s hands fidgeted slightly.

your heart raced as you heard his words. a wide smile spread across your face as you realised what he was really asking.

“are you..” you paused. “are you asking me to be your girlfriend?”

his breath got caught in his throat as he nodded. “yeah.”

the man that was the literal leader of an entire gang, was sitting nervous infront of you. it was a funny sight to see, but you brought yourself back to reality, answering his question.

“yes.”

a wave of relief washed over his face as he let out the breath he seemed to be holding. he reached out, his fingers brushing yours briefly as he leaned closer. “wanna sleep in my bed tonight?”

deleted scenes

other fics

[lonleyhumanbeing]

Random Mechanisms moments I love:

I refuse to listen to DotM so this is incomplete, and terribly formatted.

"Wasn't it the aristocratic one with all the knives?" "Ah yes, the Marquis de AlltheKnives,"

Ashes has a lot of gold on board, 'for tax purposes'.

Jonny "I got a prescription of 1/2 an ounce of lead to be injected directly into the brain. AND IT WASN'T A PRESCRIPTION FOR ME!" *bang* d'Ville.

The first time we canonically meet Jonny he commits patricide, murder, and arson.

The card taps in One Eyed Jack scratch my brain so well.

The fact that Oedipus is called a motherfucker. Multiple times.

Guinevere's verse in Blood and Whisky being faster, because she is the fastest draw.

Seriously I’ve listened to the song 50+ times and I still get so happy thinking about the faster tempo.

“We’re not pure of heart but we’re sure of aim,”. These three I swear.

All the Suits turning up in pinstripes.

The entirety of Gunpowder Tim vs. the Moon Kaiser. It's getting its own post, and I have listened to it 27 times since 12/03. That's 270 minutes, or 4.5 hours.

The dwarf Dopey just being General Tuco DOPED up on drugs.

The Toy Solider.

The fact that, even for a moment, love won in the end of High Noon Over Camelot.

How creepy Holder of the Grail is.

The Riddle of the Sphinx’s answer is man. The riddle of the sphinx virus was also man, taking the life force for themselves.

10 caliber= X-caliber= Excalibur.

The sellguns on Fort Galfridian are the same as freelances in medieval times.

Baldur was killed by Missle Two.

“Any window with a hammer can be an emergency exit”

Tim and Brian during the tea party in Alice.

The entirety of Alice, actually. I feel like it’s a hidden gem.

Lost in the Cosmos :(

In Drunk Space Pirate, Jonny calling himself first mate is the best way to show his character growth.

Ivy died in a library fire. Her last name is Alexandria. As in the Library of Alexandria. Which burned down.

Marius “mom says hi” von Raum in the UDAD live version of Favored Son.

Orpheus being called a borderline child in UDAD live show, but in the fiction he’s like 27.

Jonny playing the drums in the UDAD live show during Sirens. Very flamboyantly/pissily.

[axelsagewrites]

Daemon Targaryen*Gala

Sugar Baby Series Part 5 finale

Part one - Part two - Part Three - Part 4.5 - Part Four

Pairings: Daemon x f!reader

Summary: The reader finally has to face the whole Targaryen family at their gala and Otto is far from happy

Warnings: drinking, drunk Rhaneys, Drunk Otto, grabbing, threats, brief fight but nothing graphic

Word count: 5655 (i kno but its the finale i had to)

Masterlist Here

“She’s fucking your uncle for money bro,” Cregan’s words made Aemond’s eye go wide. Aemond sat stunned, looking between you, Cregan, and Jace who just shrugged. “And she’s going to your family reunion so if you could refrain from knives- “

“Cregan!” Sara hush whispered, jabbing her brother with her elbow.

Aemond paused for a moment before turning to look at you, “Are you really Daemon’s sugar baby?” He asked, the words sounding like sick in his mouth.

You gave an awkward smile, glancing at Jace for reassurance, “Kinda yeah, I mean yes I am,” you stuttered out, eyes falling to the floor.

You heard Aemond’s sigh and looked up to see him relaxing back into the booth, “Well then. Make sure he pays you double for the gala,” Aemond said before swallowing his drink in one go, “And bring a flask,”

Aemond wasn’t exactly comfortable with the fact his uncle was paying his friend for their company, struggling to believe sex wasn’t a part of the deal, but with a couple drinks he soon came around. The next morning all five of you woke up spread across Jace and Cregan’s flat. Jace and Sara somehow managed to stumble to his bedroom while Cregan lay in the bathroom, head hanging over the toilet as he slept.

You meanwhile woke up on the couch with a pounding headache and no clue how you got here.  The one thing you knew for sure was that the bacon smell was not Cregan’s doing and didn’t smell burnt so it couldn’t have been Jace. When you stumbled through to the kitchen you tried to conceal your surprise when you saw a fresh face Aemond cooking up a professional level breakfast.

“Dude, you drank more than me,” you mumbled as you took a seat at the kitchen table.

Aemond scoffed but you saw the smile at the edge of his lips as he handed you a plate of eggs and bacon, “Not my fault you all cant handle a few rounds,”

“You made us do tequila shots. 3 fucking shots,” you reminded him as you dug into the breakfast.

You looked up when Jace walked in clutching his head and heading for a glass of water for his Advil. “To be fair the first shots were Sara’s fault. I think she ands Cregan are dead in the bathroom,” he said, gulping down the water as if he was in the Sahara desert. Jace paused for a moment, looking up at his uncle then back to the bacon, “I knew I always liked you,”

Aemond scoffed yet again before handing Jace a plate and the two boys joined you at the table. Meanwhile you replied to daemons texts asking if you had made it home safe last night. “Texting Daemon?” Jace asked, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

“I’m eating,” Aemond groaned in disgust as you finished off your text with a smirk before sitting the phone down. “Now onto more pressing issues,” even Jace looked confused at Aemond’s sudden seriousness, “We have to train you. For the gala,” Aemond rolled his eyes at yours and Jaces loud groans and protests, “Trust me, you want my help,”

“Why?” You groaned, desperate to just enjoy the greasy food that somehow was making this hang over bearable. “How hard can it be to wear a dress and smile?” The look Jace and Aemond shared made a pit grow in your stomach.  “That is what Galas are right?”

Jace sat down his fork, glancing at Aemond before looking back at you, “Maybe you do need our help,”

Being hung over was bad enough but being hungover and going through Aemond Targaryen’s Class and Etiquette masterclass made you never wanna drink again. You did everything from learn which fork to yet with, how to shake hands, who to approach and what to say, who liked who and most importantly who hated who.

“And remember no matter what,” Aemond said as you walked up and down the living room with a book on your head, “Never be left alone with my mother. Fake a heart attack if you have to,”

“Is she the one who made you learn all this crap?” You asked as sara sniggered at your pathetic attempts to balance the book on your head.

“She was worse,” Aemond chuckled, “Way worse actually one time she made Aegon walk barefooted in the snow- “Aemond paused when he saw you stop walking and Jace and Sara staring at him like someone had shot him, “Never mind, just trust me. Avoid her,”

“Noted,” you said sceptically as you continued your newly learned prissy walk, “Do you think she’ll recognise me?”

Jace and Aemond shared a concerned look before Aemond cleared his throat, “She um remembers you yeah,” he didn’t go on till you death glared him, “She kinda well she wouldn’t let my dad say his order to you at the restaurant cause she thought you looked like a well,” he paused until the silence was more awkward than him just spitting it out, “A gold digger?”

Sara cackled while Jace face palmed while you stood open mouth and shocked. “I’m not-well I know it could seem- she-I’m not a gold digger!” You finally spat out. “Am I a gold digger?” You asked, looking between all your friends.

“The politically correct term is sugar baby,” Sara chirped, her hangover sadly gone.

“Oh my god,” you whispered, realising the horrible truth, “What if she finds out?!”

Aemond sat up, his elbows resting on his knees as he stared you down, “She cannot find out,” he said sternly, “Don’t worry. We’ll cover for you. We will survive this,” he said, somehow making it sound more like a war than it already was.

When you finally managed to escape Aemond’s class you only had time to run home, change, and head right back out to meet Daemon for lunch. Daemon was already sat at the table when you walked in, standing up he saw you, “You look stunning doll,” Daemon said, kissing your cheek before pulling out your chair, “Hungover?” He questioned with a slight smirk as he took his own chair.

You chuckled a bit as you glanced over the menu, “Nah I’m fine now. Your nephew helped with that,” you said as the waiter approached, and you both ordered.

After ordering daemon looked back at you, “Which nephew love? Should I be concerned?”

You snorted a little at his comment, “Jealous?” You asked before shaking your head, “Well Jace was there but it was mostly Aemond,”

“Aemond,” Daemon said, eyes wandering to the side as he thought, “Is that the eyepatch one or the syphilis one?”

“Aegon had syphilis?” You asked shocked, leaning forward wide eyed, “But yes Aemond has an eyepatch,”

“So why were you having a family reunion without me doll?” He asked. As you explained the rigorous etiquette you had just been taught the waiter brought the food over and Daemon hung off your every word. As you finished your story, finally able to dive into the amazing looking food, daemon nodded silently, “So he warned you about the gala?”

“He made it sound worse than world war three,”

Daemon chuckled at your description as he mulled it over, “That’s the Aemond I remember alright. You’ll be fine doll just stick to my side or my nephews if I get pulled away by someone but if you see my alone with a Baratheon for more than five minutes you’re obligated to swoop in and save me,”

“Mr Targaryen your doctors on the phone you’re having a heart attack right now,” you said, putting on your best posh accent making Daemon snigger. “There is something I need to ask though,” you said as you pushed the food around your plate with your fork.

Daemon raised an eyebrow as you avoided his gaze, “Everything okay love?”

“Yeah, it’s just um,” you said before finally looking up, “How am I supposed to say I know you? Aemond got worried about people finding out and yeah what’s like the plan?” You asked.

Daemon paused for a moment, sipping on his coffee before nodding, “Well I rsvp’d for a plus one so you’re my date and if anyone keeps prying i’ll tell them to fuck off,” you couldn’t help but laugh at his attitude but part of you knew it would not take much to push daemon into doing exactly that, “If anyone asks we’ll just say I met you at your work and we hit it off. Assuming you’re okay with pretending to be my girlfriend,”

You knew the idea of being Daemons girlfriend wasn’t supposed to fill your stomach with butterflies or make you want to lean over and kiss him. You were his sugar baby, someone he paid to like him, but you couldn’t help the feeling. “I suppose I can make it work,” you said with a shy smile before taking a drink to try concealing your fluster.

It didn’t go unnoticed however and daemon smiled quietly to himself as he watched your antics. Gods, he thought to himself, is it wrong he didn’t want it to be pretend? He kept his thoughts to himself as lunch continued.

“So where should I ask the driver to drop you off today?” Daemon asked as he helped you put your coat on to leave.

“I was kinda hoping I could stay at yours again tonight? I’ve gotta go in to work early tomorrow and your place is closer,” you said as you took Daemons hand without second thought as you began to walk out the restaurant.

Daemon laughed as he took your hand in his, his thumb stroking over your skin as it always did, “Of course doll. Though you don’t need the excuses love,” he smirked when he saw your head dip, a faint blush spreading over your face as he helped you into the car.

With every passing day you got slightly more nervous about the Gala on Friday. The whole of the Targaryen corporation got a half day because of the event but luckily you didn’t work Fridays so could spend the whole day worrying. Daemon unfortunately had to go into the office to sort some last-minute Gala financing out but said you were welcome to get ready at his house and even agreed to let Jace and Aemond over as well.

Jace and Aemond weren’t shocked by the extravagant house in the slightest, but Sara walked in, and her jaw hit the ground. “What the hell?” She gasped as she walked in, having decided she was more than welcome to come as well to do your makeup. “Why can’t I get a sugar daddy?”

“Hey!” Jace protested, his arm defensively going over her shoulder, “Give me a few years alright im still in uni,”

Sara scoffed as she pushed Jaces arm off to explore the house. Now it was time for business, “Where’s your dress?” Aemond asked, forgetting to say hello as he searched his uncle’s house.

You unzipped the dress bag revealing the dark purple satin evening dress that Daemon had made to your exact size. “Ta da,” you said, turning the dress to show the group.

“That’ll do,” Aemond said, nodding his head approvingly as he took the dress out the bag, “Now for makeup- “

“i’ve got that bit covered Aem’s,” Sara said as she flung her arm over Aemond’s shoulder, pinching his cheek. The two had grown a love hate relationship since Aemond took time off where Sara was her usual bubbly self and Aemond pretended to hate it. “Oh my god I forgot how gorgeous this dress is,” she gushed as she reached for the dress, “Hey!” Sara protested as Aemond snatched it away.

Aemond rolled his eyes as he slipped it back in the protective bag, “Not a chance. I don’t know where your hands have been. Now let’s get this show on the road,”

“Princess diaries style,” Jace grinned causing everyone to look at him, head tilted, “Sara made me watch it,” he mumbled.

“Bitch please you made me watch it,” Sara said before grabbing your shoulders and leading you to sit down, “Now let me at this face. I have work to do,”

Daemon had given you his credit card to get everything you needed for the Gala; makeup, shoes, jewellery, whatever you needed to complete the look. Sara took great pride in picking out the makeup with you and now began to slather it on your face with Aemond watching over her shoulder to keep it tasteful. You were thankful Jace was there to mediate.

She ended up giving you a soft purple eye look with a little bit of smoke and glitter, a more natural face and just gloss for lips. “Perfect,”

“Hot,”

“Looking good babes,” Jace cheered from the other end of the couch from where he was playing wordle on his phone.

Sara stood up with a gleeful smile, “My work here is done,” she said, clasping her hands together. You didn’t even question how Aemond knew how to do hair as he began to curl and pin it in place.

Jace and Aemond eventually went to get in their tuxes themselves and now all you had to do was get dressed. As you were heading upstairs for Sara to help you into the dress you heard Daemon getting home. “I’m home doll,” his voice called out across the entrance.

“Omg he calls you doll?” Sara whispered, grabbing your arm tightly.

“I’m just getting changed Daemon. Jace and Aemond are downstairs,” you called back as Sara dragged you to the bedroom, squealing at the sight.

The dress fit like a glove and the material was so soft it felt like ice water on a hot day. Sara made sure your hair was sitting perfect, shoes and jewellery was on, and makeup was perfect before you walked down. She was determined to give you your ‘teen movie’ moment as she called it.

When you walked down the stairs, seeing Daemon sitting on the couch with Jace and Aemond waiting for you, you almost felt nervous for some reason. At that exact moment that you contemplated turning back Daemons head turned to face you. You watched as his jaw went slack, his eyes scanning up your body as he stood from the couch.

He walked from the couch to the stairs silently, meeting you at the bottom and taking your hand softly into his, “Beautiful,” he murmured before holding your hand up and making you give him a slow spin, “Absolutely gorgeous love,” he said, pulling you in for a brief kiss while Sara awed and Jace gagged.

“Thanks doll,” you said, rolling your eyes to disguise you blush, “Are you gonna get ready?”

“Give me five minutes doll. Just gotta change,” he said as he finally let you go, moving past you to head up the stairs before pausing, “Sara, right?” He asked, taking her hand to shake softly.

“Yeah,” she said, her eyes wide as Daemon almost smirked before walking up the stairs. “Wow,” she mouthed to you as she walked down the stairs.

“Babe!” Jace whined at his girlfriend’s actions. The teasing and bantering didn’t stop until you saw Daemon reappearing at the top of the staircase. Unlike Jace who chose a plain black tuxedo and Aemond’s white one Daemon had opted for a dark purple tux to match yours with a lavender shirt underneath. Jaw dropping was an understatement. “You clean up nice,” you grinned, moving to stand beside daemon.

“Thank you love,” he said, his arm moving to wrap around yours before kissing the top of your head. Daemon smiled at you for a moment before turning to the nephews, “Called the cars. One to drop you home,” he said pointing to sara who looked like she may swoon at any second. Lucky for her Jace decided to spare her the war that was the Targaryen gala. “One for you both,” he nodded towards the boys before turning to you with a light smile, “Then one for us,”

You could melt under his gaze despite Jaces ews and Aemond’s eyerolls. For a moment you weren’t even worried about the gala. You just wanted to enjoy the moment as you all shared a glass of wine before the cars came. Sara was practically bouncing as she got into the car, hers being the first to show. Daemon sent Jace and Aemond in the next one, wanting to savour the last few moments alone with you. “Promise you won’t hate me if I show myself up tonight?” You joked as Aemond and Jace left.

“Nothing could make me hate you doll,” Daemon said, kissing your lips softly before pausing, “I got you something,” he finally said as he pulled a small box out of his pocket.

You gasped when he opened the box to reveal the most beautiful ring you had ever seen, “This is too much,” you said as you studied the ring.

“I could give you the world and it still wouldn’t be enough,” Daemon said as he took the ring out of the box, slipping onto your finger as he kept his eyes on yours. You couldn’t look away from those lilac eyes, even when the car honked outside you didn’t want to walk away. “c’mon love we’ll be late,” Daemon said softly as he took your hand in his.

“Okay,” you said, grabbing your purse and readying yourself. “Let’s do this,”

Despite all the prep you hadn’t expected all the flashing cameras or the lilac carpet, something you wondered if Daemon had suggested as you stood beside your date to pose for the cameras. Daemon work his signature sexy smirk as his arm slinked around your waist, resting on your hip, before you were ushered off the carpet to finally get inside of the gala.

Inside was thankfully less hectic but there was still a lot of hustle and bustle as people waited for the gala to usher them in. Servers passed out strange hors d'oeuvre you’d never heard the name of and, thankfully for you, champagne and wine. You gladly accepted a glass, almost drinking it in one go to steady your nerves. Daemons arm was locked protectively around you the whole time.

You glanced over to where Aemond looked like he was being sharply questioned by his mother, Jace standing a few feet away trying not to laugh. He gave you a slight nod when he noticed you looking. At least there were some friendly faces you supposed.

When the doors were finally opened you were ushered into a large hall with circle tables covered in red table clothes. Daemon guided you through the mess of tables and people to your seat. Apparently, the table assignments had been a lengthy process that he and his brother studied together while organising the affair. You were sat at a table with Daemon on one side and Jace on the other.

You smiled as Jace sat down and did your best to act natural when Rhaenyra, Lucerys, and Harwin strong arrived at the table. As they took their seats Jace began to whisper to you how his aunt tried to have Harwin banned from the affair but once they found out they were engaged nothing could be done.

“Who’s your friend sweetie?” Rhaenyra asked as she scooted her chair in before looking up and tilting her head, “Do I know you from somewhere?”

“She’s friends with Sara mum,” Jace said, blushing at the mention of his girlfriend which only made Luke start to make fun of his older brother.

Rhaenyra scolded Luke but before anything else could be said a loud microphone static rang across the room. “Is it on now?” Viserys voice was supposed to be a whisper but you and Jace sniggered as it rang across the room. “Okay good, good. Well, I would like to welcome…” Daemon had warned you about his brothers’ lengthy speeches at these things however you tried to listen but all you really heard was fundraiser, food, champagne, and eat. And eat you would.

You almost moaned as you bit into the food, something Daemon couldn’t help but chuckle at. Even though part of you knew Rhaenyra had recognised you, you were grateful for her discretion. The whole meal was surprisingly painless, even enjoyable, as Rhaenyra told you embarrassing stories about Jace, and daemon and daemon finally seemed to let loose around his family. During dinner they began to pace out donation slips for everyone to fill out. When you tried to peak at Daemons donation slip, he quickly pulled it away with a grin, telling you not to be so nosey.

When the dinner was over you were all ushered to the bar while they rearranged the tables, but you didn’t complain when you learned it was an open bar. You were stood beside Jace at the bar sipping your drink, your buzz already going, as daemon wandered off with Rhaenyra to talk to a client.

Jace waved at someone behind you and when you turned you felt your stomach churn. “Hi grampa, granny,” Jace said as he gave Rhaenys a hug and Coryls a firm handshake with a pointed but goofy look.

“Your grips improving son and look who it is,” he said turning to you, his arms opening, “Jace I see you’ve stolen my best employee,”

You blushed as you tried to avoid Rhaenys confused look, “Uh no she’s just my friend grampa. My girlfriend couldn’t make it,” Jace explained, “She’s uncle daemons date,”

Coryls let out a loud chuckle at that one, “Oh Daemon what’s he like,” Coryls said shaking his head, “I’d say you better make him happy but im sure you do sweetheart,” he tried to joke when his wife exclaimed.

“I know you!” She said, almost staggering as she pointed at you, “You used to work for me, at the Den. Oh sweetie how have you been?” She gushed, throwing her arms around you. You gave your boss a wide eyed look as he attempted to pry his drunk wife from you, “You know I know I should say this but,” she said, looking around as if someone was spying on her, “I’m so glad someone finally yelled at that awful witch,” she whispered in the loud way all drunk people do.

“Sorry bout that,” you said but you couldn’t help but laugh at her state as Coryls pulled him back to his side.

“No don’t be,” she said, holding your arms, “I would’ve done it years ago but someone,” she said giving her husband a dirty look, “said I wasn’t allowed,”

“Okay sweetie,” Coryls said as he brought Rhaenys properly into his grip, “Lets go find you some hors d’oeuvre, okay? Sorry about this,” he said turning back to you.

“I don’t know what you’re on about boss,” you grinned.

“That a girl,” he said before steering his wife off in search for food to sober her up.

You turned back to Jace, wide eyed as he sniggered at the interaction. “Well, that was fun,” before you could do anything else everyone began to shuffle back into the hall which had now pushed all the tables around the edges to create more of a dance floor. Viserys gave yet another speech before the music began.

While it wasn’t the music you and Jace would usually dance to he still insisted on dragging you out onto the floor. You and Jace were easily the youngest pair dancing. Aemond had taught you many of the dances he had been forced to learn in childhood, so it was surprisingly painless as you danced the Dornish Waltz.

As you danced however you could feel daemons eyes on you and when you looked you couldn’t help but smile at the way he watched you. However, there were another pair of eyes on you as you danced, and those ones were less forgiving.

When the dance ended daemon gave a slow clap as he approached you, taking your hand into his, “i’ve got her from here,” Daemon said, nodding for Jace to leave as another song began. The next song was dance of the dragons and it was easily your favourite one you had learned despite you being out of breath by the end, “You did perfect doll,” Daemon praised, giving you a brief kiss. However that much of a kiss seemed to be considered PDA by the way people looked at you.

For the rest of the night, you went between talking to and dancing with Jace, Daemon, and even Aemond who reluctantly gave you a dance. Aegon had asked for one, but Aemond had unceremoniously told him to fuck off making him retreat like a kicked puppy. Aemond also made sure to introduce you to a very sweet but very shy Heleana. You could feel ottos and Alicent’s death stares on you, especially when you danced with either of her children, but it was too busy for her to do anything about.

After much dancing and even more drinking, you found yourself sweaty and out of breath at the side of the dance floor. Daemon was off talking with Coryls while you hung out with Aemond when a girl, a very cute girl you mentally noted, approached Aemond with a warm hug that made his pale cheeks tinge red. Apparently it was one of his sisters’ friends she went to boarding school with. When Aly asked Aemond for a dance you practically answered yes for him, pushing him to show off his moves.

You meanwhile were buzzed, alone, and far too warm so you decided to step out for a few moments for some fresh air. Luckily for you just outside the door to the banquet hall was a balcony over facing the city that some people used to smoke but you used for some cool crisp air. The two men who were on there smoking left not long after you walked out leaving you alone to enjoy the noise of the city.

That was until you heard the glass door to the balcony open again. “I wondered if it was really you,” Ottos cold voice made you spin round on your heels leaving you face to face with the man who tormented you at the restaurant for months with his petty orders, “Im shocked you’re brave enough to show your face,”

“I should be going,” you muttered, trying to move past him but Otto blocked the door making you sigh, “Look I’m sorry about before but can I just get past- “

“You really think sorry will cut it? After you embarrassed me in front of my daughter,” he said, taking a few steps closer making you back up. All you could do was hope someone would walk past or to sneak past, but each move you made he copied, “Then now this. You show up to my family’s fundraiser uninvited looking like a tart,”

“I’m here with Daemon,” you practically spat out the words as you tried to push past. “He’ll be looking for me,”

Otto rolled his eyes, “Please that mans always drunk off his arse. Don’t act like I don’t know what you are,”

Your eyes narrowed at the man, stepping closer to him, “And what’s that?” You asked, smelling the whisky reeking from his breath.

“Just some whore,” before you could think you felt his cheek against your palm as a loud slap rang through the air. Your eyes widened, realising what you’d done as Otto roughly grabbed your wrist, “Don’t think we all can’t tell,”

“Father,” you heard the harsh whisper of Alicent’s voice before you saw her snake through the door, closing it quietly behind her, “What are you doing?” She hissed.

“Don’t you recognise her?” Otto asked, finally letting your wrist go and shoving you away.

Alicent tried to pull her father to the side, but he kept pushing her off, “Dad we’re in public,” she tried to reason with him as he continued his tyred.

As the two struggled you tried to rush away but as you reached for the door handle you saw daemon storming over to the balcony. “Why are you defending that gold digger?” Otto said as Daemon opened the door.

“What did you call her?” Daemon practically growled at Otto who finally moved on from Alicent to Daemon. You glanced over at Alicent, her face briefly contorted into some kind of sadness before she covered it again with a hard-line smile. “Go on say it again Hightower,” Daemon spat as he pushed at Ottos shoulders.

“She,” Otto said, pointing past Daemon, his finger wagging straight at you, “Is a gold digging whore,” he said the words slowly as if he was talking to a child, “And you-“ he said jabbing a finger into daemons chest, “are embarrassing the company by parading around some prostitute,”

Before you or Alicent could do anything, a loud cracking sound came from Ottos face as Daemons fist crashed down on the drunk. Otto stumbled back and part of you wondered whether Daemon was about to throw him from the balcony. Thankfully the doors were thrown open yet again but this time by the eldest Targaryen and two security men.

“What the hell are you two doing?” Viserys yelled, as much as an old man can, as you and Alicent backed into a corner, Alicent putting herself in front of you and for a moment you wondered if she cared. “Care to explain Daemon?” He said gesturing at his brother like a mad man.

“He was calling my date a prostitute,” Daemon said, his voice low and eerily calm. As he spoke you thought of a plan, silently but quickly switching the ring daemon had given you earlier from your right middle finger to your left ring finger.

Viserys paused for a moment, looking between you and Otto, “Brother you can’t understand how one might think- “

“I’m not a prostitute!” You said, finally speaking up for yourself and pushing past Alicent. “Or a gold digger or anything else,” you said as you put on your best indignant voice as you moved to stand by daemon, taking his right hand in your left, squeezing it quickly. Daemon glanced down, pausing for a moment when he saw the ring had switched.

Viserys paused, stammering for words, as a security guard checked out Otto and another tried to comfort Alicent, but she just pushed him off. Finally, Daemon looked up, raising your hand in his so that Viserys could see the ring, “She’s my fiancé you twat,” his spitting like venom but still the word fiancé sounded so nice off his tongue. “I was going to announce it tonight, but Hightower over here cornered her on a balcony to call her a slut,”

Otto tried to stutter for an answer but finally Viserys piped up, “She’s your-how long have you even known her, Daemon?”

“Two years,” he lied.

Before Viserys could keep questioning you continued the lie, “He came into the café I worked at before the Dragons Den and asked for my number,”

“We’ve been dating since,” Daemon said, expertly bouncing off your own lies. “I proposed last week and thought id share the good news with my brother but apparently not,” Daemon said, his face screwing up and for a moment you thought he should take up a career in acting.

“That’s the ring he proposed with?” Alicent asked indignantly, smelling a lie but unable to prove it.

You rolled your eyes before answering, “This is a temporary one, the real ones at the jewellers,”

“I bought the wrong size Alicent, hardly worth your father threatening my fiancé,” Daemon said as his arm linked around your waist.

Viserys sighed as he got in between his brother and wife, holding his hands up for peace, “Okay okay enough. Daemon I’m sorry we didn’t know. Otto- “Otto tried to pipe up, but Viserys raised a hand to silence him, “Is deeply sorry. Aren’t you otto?” Viserys shot him a nasty glare till otto reluctantly nodded. “And I’m sorry (Y/N),” Viserys said turning to look at you finally while you did your best to seem like you were bursting from excitement from getting away with the lie.

“I think its best if we leave,” Daemon said, holding his head high, “I trust you will deal with Otto on Monday considering this is a company event,” he said with a pointed look to his older brother.

“Yes of course,” Viserys said as he walked you and Daemon inside, leading down to the exit, “And I am happy for you brother. You two make quite the pair,”

Daemons eyes fell on you as he smirked, “I agree,” he said before bidding his brother goodbye. You tried to be nice with Viserys who looked exhausted from the whole interaction.

As Daemon reached into his pocket for his phone to call a car you stopped him, “Lets just walk,” you told him. Daemon squinted at you for a moment before finally nodding in agreement, taking you by the arm, “I know a 24/7 dinner we can try. It doesn’t have the same level of caviar,” you said in your best posh voice making daemon chuckle as you walked into the cool evening air, “but its good food,”

“Whatever you want love,” daemon said, kissing the top of your head as you walked.

As you walked you thought for a moment, your mind going back to the ring, “Daemon?” You said and he hummed in response, “If you wanted to propose, for real, I wouldn’t be totally opposed,”

Daemon glanced down at you, a smile playing on his lips, “I wouldn’t mind if you said yes,” he said before his eyes flickered away. His arm tightened around your waist, grinning as he did, “i’ll order the flower petals,”

Taglist: @clairacassidy @valeskafics @starkleila @delicious-xx @pet1t3 @skyesayshi @urmomsgirlfriend1 @dark-night-sky-99 @lantsovheiress@themotherofblood @avalyaaa @simbaaas-stuff @lunampacheco

[ash-and-books]

Rating: 4.5/5

Book Blurb:

Knives Out gets a holiday rom-com twist in this rivals-to-lovers romance-mystery from New York Times bestselling author Ally Carter.

The bridge is out. The phones are down. And the most famous mystery writer in the world just disappeared out of a locked room two days before Christmas.

Meet Maggie Chase and Ethan Wyatt:

She’s the new Queen of the Cozy Mystery.

He’s Mr. Big-time Thriller Guy.

She hates his guts.

He thinks her name is Marcie (no matter how many times she’s told him otherwise.)

But when they both accept a cryptic invitation to attend a Christmas house party at the English estate of a reclusive fan, neither is expecting their host to be the most powerful author in the world: Eleanor Ashley, the Duchess of Death herself.

That night, the weather turns, and the next morning Eleanor is gone.

She vanished from a locked room, and Maggie has to wonder: Is Eleanor in danger? Or is it all some kind of test? Is Ethan the competition? Or is he the only person in that snowbound mansion she can trust?

As the snow gets deeper and the stakes get higher, every clue will bring Maggie and Ethan closer to the truth—and each other. Because, this Christmas, these two rivals are going to have to become allies (and maybe more) if they have any hope of saving Eleanor.

Assuming they don’t kill each other first.

Review:

Knives out meets holiday murder mystery romance... need I say more? Maggie Chase is a writer who is known as the Queen of Cozy Mystery meanwhile her nemesis is Ethan Wyatt, the king of Thriller Books. Maggie and Ethan have famously not gotten along, he's actually never gotten her name write in all the years he's known her and no matter how many times she's told him. Yet when they both accept a mysterious invitation to attend an exclusive Christmas party at the English estate of a reclusive fan.... neither of them expected that said fan was none other than the most powerful author in the world: Eleanor Ashley herself. However as the party goes on their host disappears... and then murder is afoot. Now Ethan and Maggie have to solve the mystery and that also means finding a way to work together... and confronting their feelings for one another. Maggie might be the queen of cozy mystery but she's about to realize the greatest mystery of all is her relationship with Ethan and what she thought was a bad relationship was completely wrong. Can they solve the mystery before it's too late and they end up dead too? This was such a cute holiday mystery romance read and I had so much fun with it. Ethan and Maggie were really cute, Ethan was especially adorable as a love interest. I loved that we do get his POV and get to see his meetcute with Maggie. It's a cute romance and the mystery was fun. It definitely is an adorable holiday read that I'd recommend!

Release Date: September 24,2024

Publication/Blog: Ash and Books (ash-and-books.tumblr.com)

*Thanks Netgalley and Avon and Harper Voyager | Avon for sending me an arc in exchange for an honest reviewe*

[movies-i-watched-this-week]

week 1 (9.01 - 15.01)

hello and welcome to the blog, this experience will be my experiment as well as documentation for myself of movies i had watched or rewatched

since most of the movies will have rating and brief review, im hoping you'll find a motion picture that interests you as well

- District 9 , 4.5/5

this week was a sci-fi mood, and district 9 is a one of a kind classic in its category. this movie can be described as a subversive expectations for an alien sci-fi movie and feels unique with its takes. a masterpiece of its kind with wonderful acting

- Snowpiercer , 4/5

dystopian sci-fi, with a very interesting concept to it (in result of ice age, humanity is forced to shelter in a never stopping train). the sgi isn't perfect and it does look like the indie movie at times, but i cant say i did not enjoy its imaginative (tiny) world and diverse characters, which the movie isn't afraid to kill no warning ahead.

- Puss in Boots: The Last Wish , 4.5/5

animation adventure comedy, had to rewatch it for the second time after watching a phone cinema recording two weeks ago for the animation of course. but also because this movie is a pleasure to experience, the story flows perfectly and no character (despite being a lot of them) is left behind in development. im happy for dreamworks to release such unique in their style movies lately.

- The Road , 4.5/5

post-apocalyptic drama, i felt like this movie is targeted towards a specific niche, if you arent interested in post-apocalyptic world building, you will find this movie boring. and since i love that stuff, this movie won me over, and not only with the genre but also with its two wonderful main characters (father and son). a melancholic, peaceful masterpiece.

- Tarzan , 4.5/5

hmhm, i only now watched this wonderful animated classic for the first time. watch it if you never did

-Tangled , 5/5

rewatched it for 30th time, and the first time in english. sometimes when i watch a movie i begin to think how did the writers think of such plot or this or that, and i just can never figure out how one Wrote Tangled, as funny as that sounds. simply a classic must-watch.

- Velma , 2/5

ye, tv series, cartoons, shows count. in time of writing this, the series has only 2 episodes and i cant say i liked them, but probably didnt dislike them as much as everyone else. its.. fine? i wouldnt recommend it but i found some really funny lines and jokes so its not 1 out of 5. and to the criticism that this show is a disgrace to the scooby doo legacy, as a scooby doo cartoons fan i did not have that feeling at all. although true, it shouldve had its own original characters since some of the jokes built for the characters come out awkward

also since its the first post it will break the rules a little and mention all the movies i watched since the beginning of 2023 that i highly recommend:

- Funny Pages (!!!)

- Glass Onion

- Knives Out

- Entergalactic (!!!)

- Cyberpunk: Edgerunners

- Guillermo Del Toro's Pinocchio

- Aftersun (!!!)

bye

[truckreincarnation]

Confession Pt. 2 || Theophania || Trial 4.5 || Re: Avery, Manami

No! No, goddammit! There Avery was, thwarting her plans. She'd hurt them once again, not unlike only a few short hours prior. That brief moment of peace shared between them in Avery's room. That look of anguish on their face. There it was again, with their words only acting as more and more knives to the chest with each one.

Avery had refused to promise her one thing. They'd said they would protect her no matter what. Should've figured that also meant from herself.

Theophania's hope was that everyone would be too angry to find the holes in her story, but Avery intercepted before anyone but Bian could say a word. She clenched her jaw so tightly it hurt, her teeth grinding together.

Why would you have used the thing you know I love to murder someone on purpose?

Those words stung more than anything. She wondered how Avery would react if she said yes. If they would yell at her, scream at her, just like she deserved. It would be easy.

But she just couldn't do that. She couldn't lie to them. And she certainly couldn't cause them pain, even if it meant she'd get her due punishment. Losing Avery was the least she could do to repent, but watching that look of pain on their face... She didn't know whether it was the selfishness of wanting to keep them, or the fact she just loved them too much to see them in pain. Either way, they told her to finally be honest.

She opened her mouth to respond, but then Manami chimed in.

Do you hate us that much?

How could she even answer that? All of the words she'd pushed down started bubbling to the surface. All the things she'd hidden, tried to get over. Now was hardly the time to hash it all out, but like the bomb that went off at the Gate, she was threatening to explode.

"...I hate you... That's right, I hate you!" The words tumbled out, somewhere between a snarl and a sob. Tears pooled in her eyes. "I hate all of you people so damn much! I hate that you were so quick to abandon Meili in favor of her unrepentant killer! I hate that you all pick and choose your morals based on how much you like a person! I hate how untrustworthy you all, how I've sacrificed my own power because I thought it was better! Because I thought I had to! Become a healer to boost everyone else's strength, you can rely on them to protect you! Except I can't because you've all proven time and time again that I can't trust any of you to do that right thing or have my back! So now I'm weak and pathetic and vulnerable and scared. I promised myself I wouldn't help any of you anymore! I would put myself first! So why...s-so why...I hate you all so much, so why did I still try to save Frank anyway?"

She couldn't control the wretched sobs that escaped her. The way her body shook and shivered from the exertion of it all. Ever since this trial began, she'd been holding everything back. The pain, the guilt, the emotion. It was all too much. But everything needed to come out.

"...And I hate that the one thing I can rely on you all to do, to yell, and scream, and insult, and accuse...you didn't do. I h-hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate...th-that you won't just punish me already, like I deserve. Because I'm a filthy killer."

She had truly never felt more repulsive. She hid her face in her hands as she continued to cry. She hadn't given any answers, not really. Avery wanted the truth. She had to pull it together long enough to. She had to. She had to. If she couldn't do this one thing for the one remaining person she cared about left, then what worth was she?

"...Purify..." Success. She only had one charge of this. She wanted to save it for Avery later, before her execution, so she could Purify their pain away. So they wouldn't have to struggle when she marched to her death.

The overwhelming emotional distress faded away into a distant hum, enough that she could pull herself together. She tugged her hands away from her face, tear streaks and makeup smears covering it.

"...I built the bomb and placed it by the Gate. Then I backed up as much as I was able while still being able to see it, and I used the slingshot to sling the knockout bomb at the larger one. That's what detonated it." She stared down solemnly at her feet. "...No one else was supposed to be there. I studied days in advance, memorizing the patrol patterns of Cap, but I didn't calculate anyone else coming out there into my plans. I didn't even see or hear Frank and Luz. If I had...I never would have detonated that bomb. Putting myself at risk...that's one thing, but I wouldn't do that to anyone else. I should've studied the barrier first. I should've done a test, like Avery said. But I was reckless and desperate. I hate this place. I thought...I thought if there was a big enough explosion..." She couldn't even finish. It didn't matter. There was no point making excuses. "...I only saw Frank after the explosion, and it was only because he was moving. I didn't even know Luz was with him. My head was in a haze, but I thought...this was my fault, he shouldn't die because of it, so I sent my Phoenix Blossom over to him, but...he refused it. For Luz. I didn't know... I didn't know..."

At least, if she'd been conscious a little longer, if she'd just seen Luz there...maybe she could've at least saved one of the victims of her negligence.

[almostcorporeal]

On Radiohead

I listened to the entire Radiohead discography yesterday because I figured it was about time I gave them a proper second chance and I want to flesh out my Rate Your Music.

Here are my thoughts on each album (:

Pablo Honey - Rating: 1.5/5 The fact that I even have to discuss this album pisses me off. I Do Not Like Pablo Honey is the most succinct way I can put how I feel about this album. It wants to be Nevermind era Nirvana so bad in the first half and then it just loses the plot in the second half. The only song I like on this album, it's opening track "You", I only like because it sounds like a typical wannabe Nirvana grunge song. "Creep" is terrible and the whole band is right to hate it. "Anyone Can Play Guitar" except Radiohead, I guess. Favorite tracks: You

The Bends - Rating: 2.5/5 I can see how this is a clear improvement from the atrocities committed on their debut album, but I still think it falls short of being. meaningful, I guess? However, it does have one of my favorite Radiohead tracks on it ("My Iron Lung". Why is that guitar so fuckin DIRTY I love it) so I will give it that. I feel it closes out strong with "Street Spirit (Fade Out)", but otherwise for the most part the album is largely just more forgettable grunge. Favorite tracks: Fake Plastic Tress, My Iron Lung, Street Spirit (Fade Out)

OK Computer - Rating: 4/5 I can see why this is largely regarded as one of, if not the (according to Rate Your Music lmfao), best albums of all time. However, it feels a bit too mechanical for my taste. The experimentalism that I'm looking for when it comes to Radiohead and their preceding reputation is there, but it feels unnatural and manufactured to me. Which I suppose fits with the album's name. Still fantastic, just not the vibe I'm particularly looking for. Favorite tracks: Karma Police, Lucky

Kid A - Rating: 4.5/5 God, I could gush about this album for a while. This is the album that makes me make a goofy "I Finally Get Radiohead" YouTube video. I've never been the biggest Radiohead fan, but this album really took my breath away. It's lonely, it's cold, it's desolate and bittersweet, full of ghosts. Favorite tracks: Everything In Its Right Place, How To Disappear Completely, Treefingers, Idioteque

Amnesiac - Rating: 3.5/5 I was told that Amnesiac is basically a compilation of stuff Thom didn't think fit with Kid A, and while I agree with that decision to separate the albums, I disagree with the seemingly pervasive fan belief that Amnesiac is bad because of it. It's a bit disjointed I suppose, but considering the source material, I don't think it detracts from the overall mood or enjoyment of the album. Imo Amnesiac is nearly as good as Kid A, which tracks cuz they're cut from the same cloth. Favorite tracks: Packt Like Sardines In A Crushd Tin Box, Knives Out

Hail To The Thief - Rating: 4/5 This album is definitely leaning more into the electronic experimentation I really enjoyed on Kid A from Radiohead. It sounds very Autechre inspired, it makes me feel like Thom sat in on one too many Warp Records recording sessions and was like "Yeah I can do that too." and God DAMN can he. Supposedly the political messaging behind the lyrics leaves more to be desired but honestly Thom could say nearly anything over this instrumentation and I'd be fine with it. Favorite tracks: Myxomatosis, Scatterbrain, A Wolf at the Door

In Rainbows - Rating: 3.5/5 I had really high hopes for In Rainbows, especially seeing as many of the Radiohead fans around me really enjoy it. However, it ended up just leaving me wanting. It felt more like it was right on the edge of greatness like I did with OK Computer than as if it had achieved what it set out for like I felt with Kid A. Ultimately, I still really like the vibe of this overall album and it's tied with OK Computer as my second favorite Radiohead album. Favorite tracks: 15 Step, Nude, House of Cards

The King of Limbs - Rating: 3/5 I really didn't feel very strongly about this album. For the most part it felt forgettable and middle of the road to me except for Bloom. I loved how the percussion in Bloom sounds like it's falling down the stairs on an alien planet with the synth in the background. I wish I had more to say about this album but I think I'll give it more time and return to it at a later date and reassess. Favorite tracks: Bloom, Feral

A Moon Shaped Pool - Rating: 3/5 I'll just come right out and say it - something about this album scratches my brain really nice. It feels haunting but hopeful at the same time. Also very lonely. I think it's representative of Radiohead's overall sound. It feels much slower than I'm used to from their previous albums but I appreciate Thom showing us all that he can slow down and still put out good music. I'm interested in seeing how their sound evolves from here and I hope this isn't the last we hear from Radiohead. Favorite tracks: Burn The Witch, Daydreaming, Ful Stop

All in all I had a great time listening to this discography and I'm glad I did so I can form my own opinion on "one of the greatest bands of all time". I learned I like Radiohead a lot more than I previously believed in the course of all of this.

Lastly, I leave you with 2 things:

Listen to Autechre, it's what Thom Yorke would want

Radiohead should make a funk album

[galemasters]

So, the Version 4.5 Special Program didn't have any hints that Chiori was a ninja, although they were unusually secretive about the events of her Story Quest. Chiori's Character Teaser is a different story.

On the surface, the video is about Chiori dealing with a snotty customer. There are a couple of things that are worth noting.

For one, in the flashback, Chiori was chided by her mentor for keeping a Tenryou Commission official waiting. Chiori gives her mentor the excuse that he was last in line, but her mentor disowns her regardless.

This has absolutely nothing to do with Chiori being a ninja at all. So, what gives?

While the video implies that this has something to do with tailoring by starting with the snotty customer demanding that Chiori tailor his suit, they never say what the official is there for, what Chiori is supposed to be doing, or what she is being mentored in.

This could be to avoid unnecessary details. If it turns out that Chiori is just a tailor, I will accept that.

But as soon as the video establishes how repelling this customer is by having him shout that his business meeting is more important than a wedding, what does Chiori do?

Throw shears like a knife.

Twice. With pinpoint accuracy. She damages his suit without leaving a scratch on his body.

Chiori being trained in self-defense so she can deal with unruly customers as an outsider in Fontaine makes sense, but that level of skill with throwing knives is improbable.

She then threatens to murder this man with a real knife. The conversation she has with Chevreuse afterwards implies that this is routine for her and she didn't actually intend to kill him, but that doesn't make it any less brutal.

This comes across less like a teaser for a tailor and more like one for a retired assassin.

Theory: Chiori was a member of the Shuumatsuban

Genshin isn't a game which shies away from having playable characters that are just guys, in spite of the ludonarrative dissonance involved. You have people who have blatantly never been anywhere near a battlefield mowing down hilichurls in droves. This is what makes Chiori interesting.

Chiori is a fashion designer who is also a stone cold badass. Her cynicism and world-weary demeanor suggest someone who has experienced hardship, and she's more than capable enough to physically throw troublemakers out of her boutique. Meanwhile, Charlotte has been tied up and thrown into the lake by a gang of criminals before. There's no need for Chiori to be so tough. Xavier did suggest that being a foreigner has made life hard for Chiori in Fontaine, but then again, we don't know why exactly she left Inazuma in the first place. Maybe it's because she had a Vision around the time of the Vision Hunt Decree... Or maybe she was a spy who was nearly outed and had to skip town to avoid implicating the Kamisato Clan.

I mean, think about it. While Chiori did claim that she doesn't moonlight as anything if the player took the chance to ask her in the Roses and Muskets event, that's exactly what a spy is supposed to say. Not only that, she was speaking in the present tense. Technically, it's true, and you were to look into her activity in Fontaine that's exactly what you'd find. But that says nothing about what she was before she came to Fontaine.

Chiori has all the skills a spy needs. She's capable of saying one thing while meaning another, she has a sharp wit, and more importantly, she gathers intelligence for the Special Security and Surveilance Patrol. Not only that, designing costumes is a part of spy work. Chiori's work on the Two Musketeers film demonstrated some skill in making disguises, in addition to designing fashionable clothing, as she identified correctly that Chevreuse would have a much easier time acting as an innocent older sibling than Ayato. While she does know the Inazuman tailor Ogura Mio personally, this could be because she needed someone to teach her to make costumes.

You might say that it doesn't make a whole lot of sense for Chiori to be childhood friends with Ayaka, given how professional the Shuumatsuban is. Sayu is very much an outlier. In reality, part of the reason why Chiori was likely a ninja is because it's even more unlikely that a member of Inazuma's artisan class would be childhood friends with Ayaka. Ayaka lacked friends because of her social class, which made it difficult to connect to others her own age. Ayaka mentions in her Story Quest that when she exited her estate, she was accompanied by family and staff. This makes it unlikely that Chiori would even have the chance to strike up a conversation with her. If she was part of the staff, that explains how she got to meet Ayaka and Ayato.

[besanii]

“you don’t love me anymore?” for wangxian from the angst print list please ❤️❤️ (bc i love to hurt myself 😭😭)

Lan Zhan, I know you can hear me, so I’m just going to say it, alright?

You’ll probably be upset with me when you wake up and realise what I’ve done, but I’m going to do it anyway. You gave your life to save the world, so it’s only fair that someone should do the same for you.

Don’t worry about me. All members of the Phoenix Tribe will go through nirvana at least once in our lives and are reborn again. I’m just going through it a little earlier than expected, that’s all. 

He finds him dancing across the lake, surrounded by giggling water spirits, his long hair fluttering behind him as he leaps and twirls, his bare feet barely grazing the surface of the water. The lotus blossoms in the lake sing in response, pink and red petals unfurling as he passes, the soft glow of their spiritual essence hovering in the air like fireflies to greet him. There’s a soft, faraway smile on his face as he greets them with a bow, before he’s gone again in a flurry of silk.

His heart thuds painfully in recognition and he’s stepping out onto the pier before he can stop himself. 

At the first creak beneath his feet, all motion over the lake comes to a halt. It leaves him suddenly self-conscious as the young man pauses in mid-turn and looks at him curiously over his shoulder. 

“Wei Ying,” he breathes, frozen where he stands. “You’re back.”

Other immortals have always talked reverently about the Crown Prince of the Phoenix Tribe and his beautiful eyes, an enchantingly dark, silvery grey with starlight in their depths. Once upon a time, he had been held in those eyes above all others and they had shone for him and him alone. Now they hold no recognition whatsoever.

The realisation is like a lightning strike through the heart, shattering the world beneath his feet.

“Shangshen,” Wei Wuxian says with a polite bow, his fingertips clasped in front of his chest. “What can I do for you?”

“Wei Ying,” he says, horror creeping into his veins and into his throat, strangling his voice as he speaks. “Do you know who I am?”

Wei Wuxian’s head tilts to the side, confused.

“Of course I do,” he replies as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “You’re Lan Wangji, the God of War.”

There was a time when Wei Wuxian would greet him with a beaming smile and boisterous laughter and throw himself into his arms without hesitation. The Wei Wuxian he remembers would have gleefully wormed his way to his side and batted his eyelashes at him until he acquiesced and showed him the affection he demanded. He searches for an inkling, a ghost of that Wei Wuxian now, only to be met with polite indifference.

It punches the air from his lungs until he’s shaking; he clenches his fists to stop himself from reaching out and grabbing hold of Wei Wuxian.

“Is there something wrong, Shangshen?” Wei Wuxian asks. Lan Wangji exhales.

“Do you not remember me?” he asks, already afraid of the answer. “Do you not remember...us?”

Wei Wuxian covers his mouth with a hand and laughs and for a moment, Lan Wangji’s heart soars with hope. Maybe this is a game and Wei Wuxian is only testing him—

“Us?” Wei Wuxian laughs again, but there is confusion in his eyes. “What do you mean? Have we met before?”

When he had woken up from his slumber after three hundred years, the fragments of his soul finally pieced together again and his heart beating to an unfamiliar rhythm in his chest, it was to the news that Wei Wuxian was gone. That he had exchanged his heart and all fifty thousand years of his cultivation for Lan Wangji’s resurrection.

The news had come, two hundred years later: the Crown Prince has returned, and Lan Wangji was out the door in an instant. Wei Wuxian is a phoenix, and phoenixes can be reborn. Wei Wuxian had come back to him at last.

That tiny shred of hope plummets back into the pit of his stomach and crumbles into dust. Wei Wuxian’s mother had warned him this may happen and his brother had cautioned him against hope, but he had not heeded their advice.

“Wei Ying,” he says numbly. “Wei Ying...I’m your husband.”

He waits with bated breath for any sign of recognition or recollection, but the confusion does not lessen in the slightest. Instead, a frown appears on Wei Wuxian’s face and he takes half a step back, suddenly wary.

“Husband?” he echoes. “Shangshen, you must be mistaken. I’ve never been married, so how can I have a husband?”

“Lan Zhan! We’re married now, so you can’t run from me anymore!”

Fondness bubbles up in his chest as he feels a pair of arms wind around his; he looks down to see Wei Wuxian beaming up at him, his dark grey eyes sparkling with mischief. He looks breathtaking in red.

There is no deception in his eyes, no amusement, no teasing; no matter how hard Lan Wangji tries, he cannot find a trace of his husband in Wei Wuxian. Still, he has to try. Wei Wuxian did not give up on him even in death, he refuses to give up on him in life.

“We were married five hundred years ago,” he tells him desperately. “It was arranged between the Nine Heavens and the Phoenix Tribe. Everyone thought we were being forced into it, but it was a love match.”

He remembers the whispers, the pitying looks they had received at the ceremony. The poor Phoenix prince, forced to marry a God almost twice his age when he could have his pick of any immortal in all the realms. He knew their age difference was larger than most and that marrying him would ruin Wei Wuxian’s chances of ever making a better match after his soul returns to the universe, but Wei Wuxian had only laughed and said it was none of their business who they chose to love.

The Wei Wuxian before him now only looks uncomfortable.

“I’m sorry,” he says. “A-Niang tells me I went through nirvana five hundred years ago and have only just woken up from the rebirthing sleep. I have no memories of my previous life.”

There is guilt in his eyes when he looks at Lan Wangji and his voice when he next speaks is kind, almost pitying. It stings more than incredulity.

“I don’t doubt we loved each other in my previous life,” he says. “But regardless of my feelings then, I do not wish to tie you to a marriage when my feelings are no longer what they once were.”

Lan Wangji feels the ground crumbling, piece by piece, around him as the words sink in; his legs buckle beneath him, sending him stumbling backward a step before he can catch himself. Still standing over the lake, Wei Wuxian’s body jerks forward as if to come to his aid. His fists flex repeatedly by his side but he does not move or speak further.

“You—” the words scrape his throat raw. “You don’t love me anymore?”

Wei Wuxian inhales sharply at the brittleness of his voice. His grey eyes are wide with shock and uncertainty as he stares at Lan Wangji; his lips part without a sound, the ghost of a tremor passing through them.

“I-I don’t—” he looks away quickly, lips pressed together in a thin line. “I’m sorry. I know you said we’re married—if you wish to divorce, I am willing to bear that responsibility—”

Lan Wangji gasps at the sudden, searing pain that erupts in his chest; he brings a hand up to press against it, feeling the way it races erratically beneath his hands, threatening to tear itself apart. Wei Wuxian turns back to him, horrified, reaching out to help, but Lan Wangji halts him with an outstretched hand.

“I-I’m sorry,” Wei Wuxian stammers again as he struggles to hold himself back. “Is there—are you alright?”

Lan Wangji takes several deep breaths, focusing his spirit inward to stabilise himself; the pain gradually subsides, leaving him weak and aching.

“Our marriage was decreed by both the Nine Heavens and the Phoenix Tribe,” he says heavily. “Everyone knows you are my husband, and I yours. A divorce would have lasting consequences for both realms. It is not so simple.”

“Oh,” Wei Wuxian says, gnawing on his bottom lip. “I guess—”

“If that is your wish, however,” Lan Wangji continues, staring at him with a hollow, wrung-out expression. “If that is truly your wish, I will do everything in my power to grant you your freedom.”

He straightens, clasps his fingers before him, and bows low at the waist. It is too formal a bow for a High God to give to an immortal half his age—he hears Wei Wuxian’s startled gasp, but pays it no mind. He is not bowing to just anyone. He is bowing to the man who sacrificed himself, the entirety of his existence, for him; the man who had done it all out of love for him. He is bowing to his husband, to whom he owes a debt too great to repay. The least he can do now is to set him free.

And then, before Wei Wuxian can recover from his shock to respond, he turns on his heel and leaves.

Lan Zhan, I’m giving you my heart, so you better take good care of it, alright?

If...if I survive this, if I am reborn again...A-Niang says I won’t remember anything about this life, so...this Wei Wuxian—the one who fell in love with you at first sight, the one who married you and willingly carved out his own heart to save you—this Wei Wuxian will die, and another one will take my place.

If you fall in love with him after I’m gone, I think I’ll be jealous. So please...promise me. Promise me that no matter how much you love him, you’ll save some of that love for me.

Goodbye, Lan Zhan. I love you.

Notes:

shangshen (上神) - High God

I guess you can consider this in the same verse as this previous prompt? Maybe? I don’t know where it fits exactly, but it’s Phoenix!WWX and Dragon/God of War!LWJ as well.

// buy me a ko-fi //

[weheartchrisevans]

Chris Evans on 'Lightyear,' playing bad guys and being 'a romantic person': 'I love love, who doesn't?'

Finally, Chris Evans gets to play an iconic hero that doesn’t involve working out.

That’s why it was so nice hitting a recording studio rather than a gym for his role as Buzz Lightyear in the animated sci-fi adventure “Lightyear” (in theaters Friday). “Pixar literally does the heavy lifting for this one,” quips Evans, whose buff and star-spangled Captain America won over Marvel fandom’s hearts and minds.

The "Toy Story" spinoff is an origin story for the beloved space ranger, with Evans voicing the role popularized by Tim Allen. In “Lightyear,” Buzz and his fellow intergalactic travelers get stuck on a planet millions of light years from Earth and have to fight a robot army led by the evil emperor Zurg.

Evans, 41, didn’t stray too far from his predecessor for inspiration.

“The reason we're doing this movie is because Tim Allen made such an iconic impact,” Evans says. “Not only would you be a fool to not take his interpretation because it worked so well, but the truth is this character is in fact the human version of that toy, so there does need to be overlap in terms of their cadence and nature."

“Lightyear” director Angus MacLane says he didn’t want to cast an Allen impressionist or even a “superheroic type” for Buzz but instead someone who had “a commanding presence that also is able to be funny without being goofy.” The filmmaker found that watching Evans in Bong Joon-ho’s dystopian film “Snowpiercer,” “where you really could see the range of what Chris could do.”

It took a while, however, for Evans to find the right voice-acting mojo. “At the beginning, I almost felt like a deer in the headlights,” he recalls. “I would just be so still. You're so focused on your voice, it almost would rest every other part of my body. But with every passing session, you find a little more comfort and before you know it, you are incorporating your physicality and that would inform the deliveries.”

After almost a decade of playing Cap, Evans is switching up his “creative appetite” and playing some antagonists for a change. He played the shady, sweater-clad Ransom in Rian Johnson’s 2019 murder mystery “Knives Out” and in the upcoming Netflix spy film “The Gray Man” (in theaters July 15, streaming July 22), Evans stars as psychopathic rogue secret agent Lloyd Hansen, who's hunting down a former CIA colleague played by Ryan Gosling. (In the movie, Gosling’s character mocks his foe’s “trash 'stache.” Evans’ key to growing it? “Luckily, I just had to sit and wait.”)

Evans enjoys exploring “a frame of mind that's so dissimilar from my own. It's easy when you're playing someone like Captain America to understand why he feels compelled to do what's right. You certainly can relate to the desire to be good.”

In contrast, “someone like Lloyd has such a unique perspective on the world,” he adds, “and it manifests in such a dark way, but to him it's completely normal. It's a fun chess game to try and get inside a role like that.”

After co-starring with Ana de Armas in “Knives Out” and “The Gray Man,” she and Evans reunite for next year’s Apple TV+ film “Ghosted,” which Evans describes as “a little throwback” to '80s and '90s action adventures like “Romancing the Stone."

“It's the type of movies that I love that I don't think get made enough,” says Evans, who got a kick out of mixing romance and comedy. “Most characters you channel through your own experience and I consider myself a romantic person. I love love, who doesn't? It's nice to have that take a center role in a piece of material as opposed to saving the world.”

An Instagram photo of his “fluffy” hairdo for the role snagged 4.5 million likes, proof of Evans’ exceeding popularity and penchant to go viral at any time. “Most of my career, I'm just standing on the shoulders of giants already. So if that type of interest in my hair is the downstream impact of the artistry of other people, I'll take it,” he says. However, Evans admits that he’s not as into the leading-man gig as he is group efforts these days.

“Playing a supporting role is the dream career. It's my favorite thing,” says Evans, whose upcoming films include “Red One” with Dwayne Johnson and “Project Artemis” opposite longtime “Avengers” partner Scarlett Johansson. “Being No. 1 on the call sheet, it can be a strange burden. Letting me be like three or four or five is the sweet spot. Plus the role is usually a little more fun anyway.”

[bansheeoftheforest]

Y'all better stop updating the syndicate au while in gone, my wifi is out because the cable frickin melted and it wont he repaired until hopefully Friday, so until then 🔫 /lh

-

1: The Society being more than tall enough to do leaps of faith off of

2: Listening to Jacob ride carriages, I have decided he loves horses. He and Jekyll are horse boyfriends and after the events of the game + tgs they run away and start a horse farm together <3

3: Having not yet heard anything contradictory. Jacob gives animals names like "Sweetroll" or "Birdy"

4: I HAVE MET THE ROTH, he is wonderful and I love he. Blighter Jekyll would 100% be in the plays when he had the free time because hey! They cant tell him he's avoiding doing work for the gang when Maxwell Roth is Right There and encouraging it. (To clarify, normal theater shows and plays, not like the one he made for Jacob :p)

OOOOOOOOH WHAT IF. They meet while at and escaping the last show. I have no clue how itd go about but it seems very fun and I love the thought of them wearing masquerade clothes n masks,

also, Jacob 🤝 Jekyll, being very likely to have a fear of fire after their respective series' fires

4.5, (just any blighter Jekyll): ALSO we dont have to worry about the blighters caring when Jekyll leaves because they tend to change sides rather easily when the twins conquer their section. So I doubt many Blighters are loyal, and I doubt Jekyll is in a high enough position in the gang to be worth caring about. The only reason he stays in is because of his brothers. Hey do you think the gang would keep the Jekyll brothers' death a secret from him? So he doesn't leave? ALSO ALSO, I saw some asks and I really dont think Jekyll would ever be a templar, the templars are loyal to their cause, and they know full well Jekyll doesn't want to be there, his brothers may be templars but it's far more reasonable hed be a blighter, the templars would never put someone who hated them in their midst. (He would look good in a templar outfit though)

5: Ghost + Syndicate crossover au because by golly I hit /alot/ of people with carriages in this game /j

---

Game update: The more I play this game the more I want to call Jacob a himbo

The /governor of the bank/ is named twopenny

I have "beat" the game, aka killed Crawford and unlocked the queen Victoria quests

I have so far unlocked 32 throwing knife capacity for Evie because gosh I adore throwing knives

You cannot stop us Darlene 🔫 (Either way, you just have to wait another day! Hopefully it will be back soon!! <3)

--

1. Imagine Jacob teaching Henry to do leap of faiths on the roof, a Lodger walks up and just manages to see the tail end of what they think is someone trying to encourage Henry to take suicide. They watch as both of them fall and the Lodger scream and runs to the edge... Only to hear laughter and see Henry and that guy poking out a haybale. That would be fun and also a very easy way to get a heart attack <3

--

2. Ehehehehe yes!! That's why I love Jacob so much bc Evie just... Insults the horses, or isn't as sweet to them so Jacob my beloved. Jacob and Henry retiring and starting a horse farm together and they get to be happy and take picnics in the forest on horseback and the events of the Jack The Ripper DLC never happens <3 3. He definitely would name all animals he owns smt really sweet. He probably would silently nickname any and all of the animals in the Society and refuse to call them by their names once he actually learns them <3<3

--

4. Jekyll and Roth being pals until Jekyll realizes how fucked up Roth is, deliberately deciding to take a few steps back but still using Roth as an excuse to get out of Blighter work and also be the star of plays. Roth would gush on about how his eyes are set on Jacob and Henry would first think he was planning to kill him but then he realizes that Roth is just very gay for the enemy.

OOH I HAVE BEEN DAYDREAMING ABOUT THAT SO HARD. Ok mainly it was them already knowing each other but Henry is too busy saving the others so he gets caught and trapped inside the building. Jacob sees him almost passing out from all the smoke and saves him. But I can also imagine Jacob trying to escape and seeing Henry getting caught by burning ceiling beams after having helped everyone else escape so Jacob carries him and ziplines over the debris and until they get to the door... Henry realizing that this is the Jacob Maxwell was working with (or if they met before when Jacob was in the theater, he realizes why Maxwell fell for him) Mmm... Traumatic meet cute <3 I think Jacob has a canonical fear of fire after that, but either way, gimme the two of them both having nightmares about fire and spending late nights cuddled up in blankets comforting each other <3

--

4.5 I honestly would not put it past them to try to hide it from him but if it was he who killed them, they wouldn't be able to keep it a secret very well... That would certainly be fun to imagine <3

True but blighters are more... The actual gang, ya know? Like they are the fighters and street ruffians and stuff and Henry certainly would not be the same kind of fighting guy like Blighters and Rooks, so I'm mostly just saying Templar because it would fit his role and position better, even if he doesn't want to be. Being a templar also seems to be a bit of an inherited role as well, smt that gets passed down from family and stuff (like, say, if you take a look at the Kenway family and if I remember correctly from them) so it probably would not be impossible that Henry would be forced into being a templar. Maybe not a real templar like his brothers but certainly somewhere between Blighter and Templar. I don't know, I just say templar bc I can imagine Henry in that role better, y'know? XD Or maybe he and Roth would share the title as the leader of the Blighters... Oooohh... That would be fun <3

--

5. I used to deliberately run over street lights and stuff when streaming the game to my friend and she thought I was really weird. To be fair it's fun to run things and people over and I wanted the achievement <3

---

Jacob is a Himbo. He really is. Don't worry about it. Himbo Jacob my beloved <3 (wait if Morcant is a Herbo (not bimbo) does that mean Henry has a type--)

Y'know how much I laughed when I realized that? That was fun XD

I still need to get around to the Victoria quests bc so far I have only finished Darwin's, Dickens', and Duleep Singh's memories so! We are both blind with this <3.

---

Mmm... Au route potential. Perhaps someone who wanted to join the Society but got rejected bc he was actually evil? Maybe Henry has his role until the Twins recruit him?

??? Where??? I think you can actually open most locked doors or find a way inside somehow!! What quest was it?? I have only one golden chest i couldn't unlock bc I skipped most of them and took them later and that's the one in the WW1 memories so I think you can get it somehow?

[scarlettaagni]

Halkrath works on his prosthetics/has Dhi’rauta come over when no one is home (which usually happens when the mothers go out to watch Lo’bane or Missy train)

so once he’s done and Dhi’rauta attaches the parts to him the first thing he’s gonna do is put on a different mask and armor, and run over to the arena Missy is training in, then crash the party by shooting plasma at her and act like a silent stranger out to kill her so he gets to finally spar his daughter for the first time and Missy is definitely going to fight like she wants to kill him (also Halkrath has to try very hard not to fight Vosandi who definitely jumps in even though she doesn’t wear armor daily and is unarmed, because he just wants 1v1 with Missy)

he knows how much she likes her knives so he brings a pair for a knife fight,  taking stabs to his prostheses like a champ and exhibiting not immediately noticeable extra strength in them compared to his real arm and leg

as she whittles down his weapons, first taking out his plasmacaster (with which he intentionally misses her), his energy flechette (ditto), then he reveals the plasma cannon he built in his fake arm (ditto)

when whoever has the upper hand pins the other (when they’ve fought long enough to satisfy him/before shit becomes Irreversible™️), he unmasks himself and immediately lightens up like “....SURPRISE !!!!”

Dhi’rauta runs up out of breath like 5 minutes later going “I TRIED TO STOP HIM... THAT LEG MAKES HIM TOO FAST”

everyone is elated Halkrath’s got sweet new kicks but Dhi’rauta and Vosandi are pissed he fucked them up JUST after putting them on, for thinking this was in any way shape or form a good idea that wouldn’t kill anybody involved, for apparently trying to kill Missy, and also manhandling Vosandi

he’s just kinda embarrassed about it as if he just bought a hot rod car he didn’t need and not just fight his daughter with deadly force, cause his defenses in order are: 1) gotta test them out [sheepish shrug] and they can be fixed i’ll be the one fixing them, 2) never fought with my daughter before and i really wanted her to give it her all, 3) I was holding back the entire time, she wouldn’t have killed me... NOT SAYING SHE COULDN’T HAVE, SHE IS VERY GOOD but basically neither of us were in danger and we could’ve taken each other out at the same time if we had, 3.5) I revealed myself before a final blow was struck, 4) darling it was supposed to be just me and her i didn’t want you caught in the crossfire, it was safer on the sidelines with Lo’bane and the other girlfriends and 4.5) the two of you together the entire time would have killed me

Lo’bane, local 60 year old (basically like 14) is just like “you could have just pretended to be a stranger and walk in challenging her”

his 360 (36) year old father is like “.... well that was plan B, but if I said something you all would have recognized my voice”

“that was PLAN B?”

“plan A was more fun and spontaneous, and it felt like a good idea at the time”

“WELL IT NEVER WAS”

Missy is busy processing everything, probably mad about being shot at and still experiencing the anger of a stranger attacking her and not answering her and manhandling her mom, absolutely overjoyed her father is back on his feet and she just went head-to-head with him for the first time EVER and kind of whooped him, also he can SHOOT PLASMA BOLTS OUT OF HIS HAND

Dhi’rauta disapproves immensely of the arm cannon but Halkrath is the one building/fixing it so she can’t do a thing about it

[juuls]

Pharmacist/Me = 1 🏆 Doctor/Nursing Staff = 0

Thank you in advance for reading this rant. I’ve been really frustrated and just needed to get this off my chest, and today at least I had a wonderful knight in a white lab coat. 🩺❤️‍🩹🥽🥼💪🏻

Content warnings and squicky squicks: (further down there is) an image of a medical vial with a clipped image of a more benign part of a syringe, health conditions (endometriosis, fibromyalgia), menstrual cycles and associated terms such as bleeding and other things, lack of empathy in my specific healthcare system, hysterectomies, pain, swearing and losing patience. Most important warning: self-administered syringes and injection discussions of legal medications (Depo-Provera) approved of by professionals and properly researched. P.S. this may sound rather Karen-like but I would never do this to someone’s face. Online ranting and acknowledging where I could do better is not the same as screaming in public for bossy requests or comps, etc. Ew.

Another ‘warning’… pharmacists being kick-ass allies and giving a damn about their patients.

I’m really annoyed because (and I know healthcare and scheduling is a clusterfuck right now, but…) for over a month now I’ve been trying to get an appointment in person to get this injectable medication that is, yes, birth control, but is also used for endometriosis in my case. And I have severe endometriosis (exacerbated severely by fibromyalgia, siiiiigh) to the point I bleed enough and lose so much I have to go to the hospital when my care is not properly preventative… like in this case, and the pain is unbelievably severe also to the point I’ve spent time in the hospital, including my 11th Christmas Eve and Day. I started this injectable medication at 13 because it was the only thing that came close to helping reduce my endometrial tissue. Even a hysterectomy wouldn’t help as much, unless they decided to go the super invasive route and remove all the organs (or parts of them) that had become ‘infected’ by the tissue. Again, tissue where it’s not supposed to be, and it causes extreme pain as the tissue tries to flush out of my body each period, even if it’s attached to, like, my pancreas. Just no. That does not work at all. No. That is not fun.

SO. I’m 31, nearing 32, and the doctor’s office knows this. I’ve had the same doctor since I was 10. Been on this medication nearly non-stop for just shy of two decades (with appropriate precautions such as bone density tests) because of the absolute severity of the pain and my inability to function when it hits… which can be months at a time of non-stop bleeding and morning sickness-level nausea and vomiting, migraines and the occasional complete inability to move—in other words, it’s debilitating.

My doctor (even the nurses, as it’s in large print at the top of my file in the system) knows all about this. They’re supposed to call me if I’m overdue by a certain margin (I get they’re busy but months and months???). But my doc’s also a bit of an airhead (albeit a smart one when he focuses) and takes forever to reply to anything on time, even when it’s a severe issue, but not severe enough to go to the hospital. But it’s gotten to the point where the nurses say to go to the ER and then the ER nurses and doctors there get SUPER pissed off (AT ME AND SOMEHOW NOT AT MY DOCTOR/NURSES AND THEIR ORDERS) at the ‘waste of time’, and it’s just a clusterfuck.

Oh yeah, and that ER visit while I was overdue for my injection? Internal intestinal bleeding along with a lovely, even if small, perforation in my fucking uterus from the growth of endometrial tissue. I MEAN COME ON — WHAT IN THE HELL. Totally preventable if they fit me in when I called literally over a month ago.

But I will not change my doctor (the other docs at the practice know what is going on and have offered to take me on, but they don’t have the experience with myself and my conditions or the history, but they can do little else because of professional conduct—it’s between myself and my doc) because he is the only one who treats me with humanity and understands fibromyalgia, endometriosis, pre-MS and pre-RhA/PsA, endo-related IBS, (ulcerative) colitis, and other neurological conditions with any degree of empathy. (See, I told you I’m a mess!) There is no way I’m switching offices in the perpetual shortage of doctors in Canada moving elsewhere for m o n e y (plus Covid-19 being a teen hooligan and constantly coming back to wreck more goddamn shit, including everyone’s sanity, then setting things on fire like the real hooligans in my village have been doing this summer — I mean… what in the hell!?!?), so with all that in mind I actually thank my lucky stars. So I put up with a lot of this shit because he treats me, besides him being an airhead, like an actual human being deserving of compassion and care and quality of life despite my severe disabilities and pain. So.

I’m usually treated really well (even if they often think I’m a nuisance for daring to be severely chronically ill/in pain all the time) so I try to be patient and good and understanding when I can.

But his STAFF (I know they’re busy and I’ve been patient but they’ve been so awful honestly to the point I cried hard enough my dad noticed my red eyes and frustration-tear fracks on my face)! And the doc himself’s inability to reply to notes on time even when urgent and when he knows the circumstances (I admit I am a bit of a hard patient so I can understand if he just kinda ignores me sometimes, honestly). But in this case I was THREE DAMN MONTHS LATE for my injection and they’ve always called in the past when I was coming due if it looked like I hadn’t scheduled an injection, so that I was all on time and squared away and didn’t risk severe pain and damage to my already-fucked hormonal system (learning I couldn’t have kids was absolutely heartbreaking, let me tell you, but even a hysterectomy in that case would solve nothing — this is by far the easiest option, especially considering how my fibromyalgia would fuck with my post-surgery recovery and leave me with lasting pain for years if not decades; sigh).

Anyway. So. After some ridiculous levels of back and forth and some truly remarkable levels of lack of compassion (she kept giving me the exact same, word for word response in a bored tone UGH) considering the severe pain I was in (I was told, in front of OTHER PATIENTS AND STAFF, that I could just wait until I talk to the doctor myself at my next phone appointment and then schedule my injection for my next MONTHLY followup — 4.5 months overdue at that point, it would’ve been — because, and I quote, ‘am used to dealing with pain because of my fibromyalgia and years of dealing with it and other conditions’ which they named in front of others!!!!!!!! what. the. fuck. But I kept my cool because I know all these people, my mom taught their kids music, they’re a fixture of the community, etc. and I refuse to be a Karen…. At least externally.

But here comes the nice part that makes me love our new (okay, he’s been here like 5 years but still, in a small town that’s pretty new lmao) pharmacist that much more. Rasik was aware of my frustration with the doctor and nurses and was even the one who brought to my attention that, at the time, I was 2 months late for my injection and he was a bit concerned since he’s privy to how much pain I exist in without throwing in one or more knives directly into my womb, ovaries, tummy, hips, and other areas my endometrial tissue has taken root. He’s such a sweetheart and he really does care for his patients— the work he does with my father’s diabetes (the tricky one where you’re not obese) management is above and beyond the call of a pharmacist and I will forever be grateful for that alone, never mind how he cares for me.

So I went in today to pick up another medication, after yet another frustrating stop-over at the nurses’ desks, and he suggested I ask for my injectable medication (it’s Depo-Provera, by the way) and the syringe plus the two tips necessary — I’m actually familiar with this since I had to learn epinephrine injections from an early age (not Epipen) and how to give testosterone daily to my ex-husband (sorry not sorry, dude, but congrats on your first kid *grouchy thumbs up*). But yeah! Legally he’s not allowed to suggest I give it to myself, but he was getting super fed up with the nurses and doctors dragging their feet and ‘being assholes with little empathy’ in his own words, so I took the hint and requested my vial plus syringe, as well as the drawing and injection gauge needles…. which he gleefully filled for me, and I reiterated that it was ‘fully my idea, not yours, Rasik, because everyone knows I’m dumb and would never think it’s you if something happened’ (I’m not dumb and I’ve given injections to others many times looool).

Long story short: HERE’S TO PHARMACISTS AROUND THE WORLD, BEING AMAZING AND CARING FOR THEIR PATIENTS AND ‘BENDING BUT NOT REALLY BENDING’ THE RULES TO MAKE SURE THEIR CLIENTS ARE CARED FOR PROPERLY. They are amazing and deserve every last bit of your courtesy, especially when they pull double duty every. single. day. because of Covid and their subsequent boosters. (i.e. boosters in the form of humans who are fucking stupid if they have no medical reason not to get the vaccine… I mean JFC.)

Rasik? You are amazing and I am 100% going to find you some Indian-Canadian (or North Indian; I believe that’s where he’s from originally) treats or desserts or make some myself after slyly asking his assistant what he leans toward liking.

Be kind to one another, yeah, but… my goodness: be kind to those who can truly make a difference in your health, sanity, and even life or death.

Pharmacists, volunteers, and frontline health workers: the true heroes of these times.

Thank you so much. So very much.

💜💙🇨🇦👨🏽‍⚕️❤️‍🩹🙏🏻

P.S. … now I just gotta stab myself intramuscularly after making sure there’s no air bubbles and etc., and swap out to the proper gauge needle (different, smaller, to draw from the vial, larger to inject so that it goes in more quickly and, oddly enough, hurts less haha). I don’t think air bubbles are as much of an issue as when injecting intravenously (ummm I have a doctor uncle and grandma nurse and nurse friends, so shush 😆). But I’ve done this for others and animals so I should be good! :)

I’m a smart enough cookie even if I’ve lost a few nibble-size pieces around the edges. 😉😘 buahaha

Cheers to my pharmacist!!!! You are amazing and I can’t wait for the pain and months and months of bleeding to settle down.

Remind me again why humans are the only mammals (animals?) with monthly fluxes? UGH wtf ever. 🙃

[ob-seth-ed]

Seth Route: Part 4 + Normal Check

*DISCLAIMER: All translations are pulled and translated from the JP app using EverTranslator and Google Translate, along with a variety of other translation sources. Translations may be modified to fit better phrasing and comprehension in English, as well as using context clues. Some information may be translated incorrectly.*

4.1

Seth came closer to MC and told her she doesn’t need to train and she should forget the story she had overheard in the hallway, reminding her that he’d tell her anything she wanted to know about and she doesn’t have to do dangerous things like that, because he’s her protector. They both fall silent and she thinks about what Seth told her and about what she had heard, even if it wasn’t the full story.

She squared herself up and told him that she may be a girl and need to be protected, but she can’t just look at the dangers ahead of them and leave them alone. Seth is surprised by her response and she adds that she had made a promise with Ray and she’s prepared to do what she can for both him and for Cradle. Seth gives her a bitter smile and tells her that she is a strong woman. Seth holds onto her arm and when MC meets his eyes, she finds that he is looking at her rather coldly. He tells her if she won’t listen to his words, then she should listen with her body.

4.2

Seth wraps an arm around MC and lifts her up, putting her on his bed. MC is confused over what Seth’s thinking or what he’s planning on doing. The bed creaks as Seth gets on his knees on the bed, pinning her hands by either side of her head. He smiles down at her and asks her if she’s not able to move. She says his name and his expression changes to one she’s unfamiliar with. He comments that Alice has a power that nobody else has, but even she is helpless under the strength of a man. He entwines his fingers with hers and tells her that he won’t allow a weak girl to the battlefield. That this isn’t her fight to fight. He smiles softly and says that her power shouldn’t be used for war and asks if she doesn’t want to live peacefully. MC realizes that this is Seth’s way of trying to protect her. MC opens her mouth to give her response.

4.3

MC tries to keep herself as calm as possible as she forms her response, trapped under Seth on his bed. She tells him that she can’t just wait and be protected, that if she has the ability to help, she will do anything to do so. She tells him that she knows that what he says is also true and she cuts off as she gets emotional, closing her eyes and thinking that she just wants to do her best. Seth sighs and mutters that women are truly strong. She opens her eyes and Seth watches her in silence.

He smiles bitterly and says that he thought she would be scared to be in a position like this. MC trails off after saying his name and Seth brings his face closer and out of her view as he presses his lips to her neck with a warm sigh. The kiss was not sweet for long, a sharp pain causing her to cry out. Her hands pinned by his pushed her down harder against the bed. She thinks to herself on why Seth would bite her and he pulls away with a light comment on her reaction. She asks what Seth did and he said that he marked her. When she asked why, he said that it was a seal to protect her from wolves. He moves off her and looks satisfied. He tells her that she can train but to remember that he will be her one and only knight, touching the spot he left on her neck. 

4.4

Stunned by what just happened, MC leaves Seth’s room. She thinks about how Seth definitely isn’t sister-like in her mind anymore. Every time he touched her, it was a reminder of how he was a man. Seth talks about how all men are wolves, but wouldn’t that also make him a wolf? MC blushes to herself as she thinks about the bite he’d given her and wonders what that was all about, covering the mark with her hand. She thinks that she will look in the mirror later to see the damage done but her name is called from down the hallway.

Ray and Sirius are there and ask her what she’s doing. She’s reminded that she had just been eavesdropping over their conversation before the incident with Seth and that they must be done talking now. They came closer and she decided that if they asked her if she’d heard them talking, she would confess, but instead they asked her why she was holding her neck. She removes her hand and tries to come up with an excuse.

It looks like my neck. [+4, +4]* 

It’s an insect bite.

It’s nothing.

[MC says that it looks like she’d been bit and she fake laughs as Ray stares at it.] Ray expresses that he’s not sure about that and her eyes tear up as they both look at her and their eyes widen in response as they realized what it really was.

Cut to the Magic Tower. Amon drops the black knight from his chessboard to the floor. He asks why the capture of Alice failed. Dalim apologizes and says that the Black Army is strengthening their defences in their war preparations. He tells Amon they should wait until the war starts in five days so they can capture Alice easily among the ruckus. Amon grumbles about them being too slow and says that they would go with their alternate plan then. He raises Dalim’s head from where he was knelt by his side. He looks at the chess piece on the floor and says that it’s time to use their discarded pieces.

4.5

Seth sits on his bed alone after MC left. Seth speaks the name of his sister** faintly and puts his hand over his left shoulder and sighs deeply.

26 days remain until the full moon.

The next morning, MC goes to the dining room, blushing and looking at the ground as she walks. She thinks about how Seth said the mark was a seal to protect her from wolves and thinks there’s no way it could be anything like that. Ray and Sirius had already seen it the night before and she picked clothes she’d purchased with Seth that first day that would cover her neck and styled her hair down to cover it as well. She didn’t want to have rumors spread about her around the barracks.

She entered the room with a sigh and was brightly greeted by Seth. He came up to her and asked why she had such a scary expression first thing in the morning. She says that he knows full well why and he let out a giggle. She doesn’t say anything because she doesn’t want to be overheard by the others in the room and he told her that he has a good idea on how she can cover her neck. He pulled something from the chair nearby and wrapped it around her neck.

4.Normal

Seth wrapped something warm and white around her neck. He says that it’s his fox, Mimo. MC is shocked that it’s an animal and she looks at her shoulder. The fox lifted it’s head to look at her in return. Seth pet the fox’s tail and said that Mimo’s specialty is disguising itself and that he often wears Mimo around his neck at parties. Mimo nodded and hid his head under his tail again. MC comments how when he hides his face, he really does look like an accessory. Seth says that he’ll have Mimo hide the mark on her neck for the whole day.

She is a bit unsure about this plan, since it seems to have her sticking out even more, as some of the other soldiers in the room are staring at her. Seth speaks loudly and says that Alice looks really cute, but he won’t hesitate to show his knives up close and personal to anyone who gives her too much attention. The men quickly look away. MC feels a bit sorry for the men, as that was a rather violent image.

With Mimo around her neck, MC bumps into Luka in the hallway after breakfast. He asks MC if she’s already been to the training grounds. She says that she had been there with Seth before. Ray had given her permission to train her nullifying powers. MC asks Luka what he knows about Seth. Luka says that he doesn’t really think anyone knows much about Seth. MC asks him how long he’d known Seth. After some thought, Luka says that Seth joined the Black Army four years prior. Luka says that if she has any other questions, she should ask Seth herself.

At the training grounds, Seth and Fenrir are there waiting for her. Fenrir asked if she was prepared for training, sporting a grin and pulling his gun out.

------

*(A/N: I took the phrase through four translators and this is the best I can come up with at this time. Original phrase: 首がこ つたみたいで)

**(A/N: Seth’s sister’s name is “ノヂシャ.” When searching this word, it comes up as the name of the plant Valerianella locusta, which has many different common names including corn salad, lamb’s lettuce, field salad, and rapunzel. We believe that the English team may go with the name Rapunzel, both for the recognizable English name and the fairy tale reference. We will be referring to her as Rapunzel going forward with the translations.)

[tigerlilyhasablog]

What I’ve Been Watching

Hello everyone! If you read my comeback post, you know that I promised a round-up of  the movies I’ve seen so far in 2020. This post has taken WAYYYY too long for me to get around to writing, but now I’m self-isolating and have plenty of time on my hands, so hopefully I should be writing more! So let’s get into it. Before I talk about films from this year, I’ve got to sneak in my thoughts about my absolute FAVORITE film of 2019…

Knives Out – 5/5

I cannot tell you how much I love this movie. I’ve seen it three times in the theater since it came out! I knew that I wanted to see it the moment that I saw the trailer, and I had heard good things about it, but I was worried that it wouldn’t live up to the hype. Turns out I had nothing to worry about. Everything about this movie is just so. Damn. Good. The characters, the storytelling, the aesthetic setting and costume design… perfection, perfection, perfection. The cast, of course, is incredible. This movie is just so much FUN, and I’m obsessed. If you haven’t seen it already, GO SEE KNIVES OUT GODDAMMIT!!!

Now for 2020…

Richard Jewell – 4/5

I went back and forth on whether to give this a 3.5 or a 4, because its been a minute since I watched it, and honestly, I had kind of forgotten about it. Upon reflection, I’ve decided that is because of how many really good films I’ve seen so far this year, not because Richard Jewell is a forgettable movie. I really enjoyed it at the time… it has just gotten overshadowed by things I’ve watched since. The performances are great; Paul Walter Hauser was not someone I was super familiar with before this film, but he seriously impressed me as the titular character. It is just a very solid film about an important story that I really should have known more about since it happened in my home state.🤷‍♀️

Just Mercy – 4/5

Oh boy, bring some tissues for this one. What can I say, this is just a really good movie: its a well-told story of a real-life issue, its hard-hitting and tear-jerking af, the performances are great (Michael B Jordan, man🙌🏻), its just super solid all around. If you don’t cry your eyes out watching this, then sorry, you have no heart.

1917 – 4.5/5

Whoa. Okay, this is an absolute must-see. Holy shit, this movie is something else. As you have probably heard, this movie is shot and edited in a way that makes it look like it was one long take. Not only is this seriously impressive, but it is also effective as hell. There is never a break from the intensity of the film, and you will be on the edge of your seat every second (I’ve seen it twice, and I was completely on edge the entire time even during the second watch.) That’s not the only thing that makes ‘1917’ super impactful, though. The actors are fantastic… I was really impressed by George MacKay. This movie really doesn’t hold back; it is an honest, horrific, emotional depiction of war, and wow, it really isn’t like any war movie I’ve ever seen before.

Like A Boss – 3/5

Okay, time for a drastic change of tone from the last few movies! Not gonna lie, I went into this movie with basically no expectations, as I had heard nothing good about it. But you know, I liked it better than I thought I would. It was funnier than I expected, though not all the jokes hit, and it was overall incredibly silly. But it’s also a fairly sweet story about female friendship. I went to see it with one of my own female friends, we had the theater to ourselves, we laughed at all the stupid parts and we had a good time. So yeah, I didn’t hate it.😅

Dolittle – 3/5

This movie was… weird. Not necessarily a bad weird, but like, really, really bizarre. It’s hard to explain exactly why without giving plot points as examples, but I’ll tell you that there were numerous times throughout the movie where I turned to my sister and said “what the fuck??” I think that there were some drugs involved in the making of this film. On the plus side, I kinda enjoyed it. There were some parts that were genuinely funny, and overall it was something fun to watch with my younger siblings. My 12-year-old brother loved it, and that’s the real test, isn’t it?

The Gentlemen – 4.5/5

Ok, this movie was fucking GOOD. Not gonna lie, when I first saw the poster and trailer for this film, my first thoughts were, god, do we really need another cool-guy crime comedy with an almost entirely white male cast? The answer is no, no we don’t. But damn, if this isn’t a great movie anyway. It surpassed my expectations in every way… I loved it. The humor is not going to be for everyone; it is very British and often extremely crude, but I fucking cried laughing, it was hilarious. The laughs alone were enough for me to like this movie, but there is more to it than that. The plot is engaging, and although I’ve heard some people complain it was slow or too hard to follow, I liked it and enjoyed the story-telling elements. I also found myself caring way more about the characters than I thought I would. Oh, and there are some gorgeous cinematic elements to it as well. Overall, great movie. I guess I need to go and educate myself on some other Guy Ritchie films.

Birds of Prey – 4/5

So, I’ve given this a 4, but this is another one that I debated giving a 3.5. I had wanted to see it again before I reviewed, but the coronavirus screwed that plan up. I decided to round up, however, because my overall feeling about this movie is that I enjoyed it. It isn’t perfect… There were some odd plot decisions, and some so-so action, but you know, I liked it. It’s just FUN. The characters are all bad-ass, the music is on point, it’s funny, it’s colorful, it’s just really enjoyable. The cast are all great, and I thought Ewan McGregor made a great villain. Also, in amongst the mediocre action there were some really great scenes (small spoiler: I’m obsessed with Harley breaking people’s legs.) Like I said, I feel like I need to watch it again to really decide how I feel about it, but overall it’s a thumbs up from me.

The Photograph – 3/5

Huh, this movie was an odd one. I really wanted to like it, and I mean, I didn’t dislike it, but I just wasn’t feeling it, you know? I confess, romance is not really my genre (I like a good rom com, but just straight up romance? Meh), but I just found myself completely uninterested in the main couple. If you haven’t seen this movie, the plot is split between the relationship between Michael and Mae (LaKeith Stanfield and Issa Rae), and flashbacks to the 80s that focus on the relationship between Mae’s mother, Christina (Chante Adams,) and a man named Isaac (Y’lan Noel.) When it came to Michael and Mae, I just did not care at all whether or not they ended up together. I didn’t give a shit about their relationship throughout the entire movie. I liked their characters individually, but together I just wasn’t feeling the chemistry. Now, with the other couple, Sara and Isaac, I actually cared a lot more. I looked forward to the parts that would focus on them, and was annoyed when the film would jump forward to the present day again. I dunno, I mean, I didn’t hate it. It was funny in places and moving (to an extent) in others. The storyline outside of the romance was alright. I just didn’t love it.

Parasite – 4.5/5

Ok, usually I only do reviews for films I see in the theater, but I had to make an exception for this… I had some friends came over and we watched it from my couch, but only because nowhere nearby was showing it. If you haven’t heard of Parasite, you’ve probably been living under a rock. After it scooped up 4 Oscars, everyone was talking about it, and rightly so. Honestly I’m not gonna give it a proper review, because you just. Need. To. Watch. It. Basically, the first half is genuinely really funny, and then it slowly gets darker and darker, and holy fuck, I did NOT see that ending coming. The story, the acting, the symbolism, the cinematography, the setting… All fucking amazing. Watch Parasite, people. Just do it.

[knivestothroats]

Part 5

Based on content it could be part 4.5 because it’s more of Luke’s pov during his/Ace’s captivity, but for the sake of simplicity... 5.

Masterlist of previous parts

THE GOOD/BAD STUFF depending on who you ask: Mind control, captivity, knives, blood, denied medical help, stitching up own wounds. 

~

As much Luke hated being left alone, it was always worse when his captors came back.

Or maybe, his captor and his follow captive. He wasn’t sure. Maybe it was just a food chain, and he was at the bottom. Sometimes it seemed like their roles depended on the day.

Often, he was left with Ace. He spent most of that time trying to figure out which they were that day; prisoner and warden, or two trapped captives.  

Ace would speak when spoken to, but they weren’t much for conversation. Luke found that if he asked for things – simple things – Ace would usually comply. Ice for bruises on his face, an extra portion of food here and there. The cot, however, was off limits.

Luke was trying to get a clear picture of how Ace operated. What things were standing orders, where he could find loopholes, the limits of Ace’s own thoughts and reason. How to convince Ace to do something. Maybe, one day, how to hold a conversation with them. He started to think of it as befriending the prison guard.

And then Miranda would come back, and he would be invisible again. Miranda certainly didn’t acknowledge him, and he couldn’t risk talking to Ace with her around.

One day, Miranda brought Ace another gift. Not a human, this time, but a switchblade. She tossed it carelessly to Ace, who caught it easily. Miranda stalked off again, leaving Ace with their toys.

“Here. Have fun. Don’t hurt yourself,” was all she said.

Ace opened the blade and turned it over in their hands. Luke thought he could see a hint of a smile on their face. They got off the bed and knelt down next to Luke on the floor.

“Give me your arm,” Ace said.

“No!” Luke protested, shying away. “Why?”

“So I can test the knife,” Ace said. “Switchblades are usually stabbing knives, but I want to see how it does on slicing.”

That was probably the longest sentence Luke had ever heard Ace speak.

“Can’t you test it some other way?” Luke asked.

“Mm. Miranda told me not to hurt myself.”

“But… I’m your toy, right?” Luke hated himself for saying it, but he saw an angle and he had to try it. “You – you have to take care of your toys if you… if you want them to last. If you want to keep them.”

He hoped, desperately, that Ace wanted to keep him.

Ace looked like they were thinking as hard as they were physically capable of. He expected smoke to start coming out of their ears.

“Why don’t… you… uh, try it on the mattress?” Luke suggested.

Ace got up and walked over to the cot. They pulled back the blanket, sighed, and then plunged the blade down into the center of the mattress.

“I already knew it was built for stabbing,” Ace said as they pulled the knife back out. They turned around and sat on the edge of the bed. They looked over the blade again. “Actually, you’re supposed to stab up when using a switchblade.”

“You, uh, use switchblades much?” Luke asked.

Ace shook their head, and then pressed their hand to their temple, as if they were getting a headache.

They looked sad.

Fuck, they actually looked sad.

“Is there, like, an apple or something in the kitchen?” Luke asked. “You could try slicing on that.”

Ace perked up immediately and left in search of fruit. Luke breathed out a heavy sigh and uncurled himself from his defensive position.

He felt like he had made progress. Perhaps discovered a trick he could pull out again later if he needed to.

What he had done, really, was make an impact.

--

Luke was sneaking food from the kitchen when he heard the door open.

Shit. He had hoped to have more time before Miranda and Ace got back. Convincing Ace not to test out a knife on him was one thing, but there’s no way he could work around a direct order from Miranda to punish him. He dashed back into the common area in a desperate attempt to simply not be caught in the kitchen.

No one was paying attention to him.

Ace had their hands clasped over one eye. Blood was streaming down from under their palms, through their fingers.

“I shouldn’t even keep you around if you’re going to make careless mistakes like that,” Miranda was yelling. “You are supposed to be a skilled fighter. You’re not supposed to slip up. You’re not supposed to get hurt.”

She didn’t say it out of concern. She said it in a way that meant, you aren’t supposed to lose.

“Move your hands,” Miranda ordered. “Let me look at it.”

Ace, grimacing, lowered their hands. Blood was smeared all over the side of their face, but gash was clearly defined, running from Ace’s forehead down onto their cheek. Luke’s stomach churned when he saw it.

“Open your eye,” Miranda commanded.

Ace did their best to comply, blinking rapidly as blood began to seep in.

“Hmm. Your eye itself is intact. You are lucky,” she said. “You’d be useless to me with a blind side like that.”

Today, Luke decided, we both captives.

“I can heal this,” Miranda said. “Do you want me to heal it?”

“Yes,” Ace said, voice thick with the tears they were trying to hold back. Luke wouldn’t be surprised if that had been an order from Miranda. Stop your incessant crying.

“Too bad,” Miranda snapped. “I want this to be a lesson. Wait here.”

Ace stood and waited, arms at their sides, until Miranda returned with an embroidery kit. She thrust it toward Ace, who took it obediently with bloodied hands.

“Go to the bathroom. Clean yourself up. And then sew it shut.”

Miranda turned and stormed out. Ace stood in place for a moment, looking with their one good eye at the kit in their red, trembling hands. A long needle and thick embroidery floss. They walked to the bathroom without a word.

Luke, ignored by all, returned to his familiar spot on the floor. He could see the open bathroom door down the hall, and he could hear shuddered gasps of pain as Ace did what they were told.

Luke pressed his back against the wall and pulled his knees to his chest.

Today, they were both captives.

[continues here]