#can attest that it works

[1yyyyyy1]

Tips & tricks on how to stop giving a fuck about other people, specifically their feelings and chimpout reactions, if you're sensitive to that stuff?

This is a complex topic. You can become sensitive to people's reactions for quite a few reasons, ranging from mild workplace disagreements to severe trauma. The most effective approach will depend on the cause. As such, I will always advise to consult a qualified professional if it is possible. The following is what found helpful in my own introspection and what I personally find important to understand about mental health.

Do you have these moments in your life where, long after a conflict subsided, you replay an event in your head wishing you had retorted with something clever? Do you find yourself thinking how stupid you are for being bothered by something this petty? Is your immediate decision to shut your eyes tight and wish for it to go away? Don't. Stop in your tracks and finish your line of thought. A disturbance like that is not petty. In situations where retaliation is not an option for a variety of reasons, be it the danger of calling out your superior, or simply because the opportunity is long gone, people tend to not only opt out of confrontation, they opt out of experiencing the related emotional feedback as well. How often do you feel that your anger is useless? That the situation is simply too dire to be resolved with a simple display of emotion, and that expressing your displeasure would be a waste of time? Anger is an indication that something is wrong, and it is useless for as long as you devalue yourself and your own biological processes. The reaction you wish you had had has not gone anywhere, you are simply suppressing it over and over again, just like you did during the incident. Recalling it in an untimely manner is what the brain does in an attempt to process the event in earnest.

The solution comes down to the following psychological phenomenon: it does not matter to your brain whether the person you are referring to is real or imaginary, it treats them all the same. If it is not safe for you to confront the person, do it retrospectively and it will have a similar effect relieving emotional tension. The same principle applies to situations where it is dangerous for you to express your disdain outright: dealing with an abusive ex-boyfriend, your parents threatening to evict you should you make a fuss. You can see me refer to an imaginary person in this post as to avoid a spat and let off steam all the same. I have had women confide me in the fact that they talk to themselves in private, and it is crucial to recognize what this process functionally is. Do not deny yourself this on the premise that it is stupid or bizarre. Whenever you catch yourself slipping into an unpleasant memory, take a step back and play out the event as if it were real. Defend yourself to the best of your ability and don't mince words. I assure you, you will not only feel better, you will no longer be haunted by the incident soon after the exercise is over.

If I were you, I would ask myself this: Why do I care? Why do I care about people's feelings? Why do I feel like I have to take them into consideration?

Many a thing with insecurities are an inverse trauma response. It is easier to assume that you breaking down means you are unfit for the job, and not that your supervisor is a bully. It would require reflecting on the circumstances that led up to the moment: financial instability, fear of losing the job, a potentially triggered flashback; that in itself is traumatic. The best thing you can do is not make an enemy of yourself. Few a person has your best interest in mind. Now is not the time to be insecure.

I do not care about people’s opinions and feelings because their input is of limited value to me. Living by this world’s principles has never worked for me, it is stupid to assume that it will now. A common concern I have seen women express over consistently making a harsher judgement is that they will end up not having enough self-awareness not to go overboard, and that they will needlessly hurt the people around them and themselves in the process. The truth is that people who are malignant behaviorally do not ask themselves these questions, and they certainly do not consider themselves being at fault a possibility. With a smidge of awareness, you are good to go.

[jadequarze]

Reunion 🖤💜

[gay-jesus-probably]

Okay so I have a lot of thoughts about the whole thing of the Gerudo being a race of entirely women, with the only exception being one man born every hundred years, and that man automatically being their king. Now this worldbuilding comes from Ocarina of Time, and there's obviously a metric fuckton of unfortunate implications there, because it was 1998. And it seems that Tears of the Kingdom is sticking with the lore of Gerudo men being extremely rare and becoming the King of their people, which once again has a metric fuckton of unfortunate implications because it's 2023 and Nintendo has somehow gotten even worse about this shit.

But let's set aside the whole... everything, and look at this from just the in-universe perspective. How does it work? I mean, it's pretty clear that there is no overlap between the kings; the old ones are normally long gone by the time a new one is born, but the Gerudo manage to take care of themselves during the hangtime. So they must have an established system of government and leadership that doesn't involve a king, and somehow that system is set up in a way that does a smooth transfer of power once a new king is born and old enough to take the throne. But why bother always declaring a random guy to be your King when you already have a perfectly functional system in place?

I mean again, the whole thing has a lot of sexist implications, but we're not looking at this from a real world context, we're examining it in-universe. And we could just go the lazy route and say that their king is in charge just because he's the only man, but I don't like that. I mean come on, the Gerudo are a race of entirely women, and most of their outside problems come from Hylian men being creepy about it. They are entirely a matriarchy; there is literally no reason for their culture to have an inherent respect for men, even if the man in question is one of them. And they're desert people; they live in an extremely harsh and dangerous landscape, if they don't have their shit together, they will die. By sheer necessity, their culture needs to put a lot of value in being practical, because if they're stupid about things, people die. They really can't afford to have a shitty leader take over, and just letting some guy take the wheel doesn't really fit with the way their culture must otherwise work.

So again, why the fuck do they bother having a King?

I think it's mainly just a ceremonial position. Yes, if the guy is a good leader he'll be in charge, but if he isn't good at being a King or isn't interested in the job... fuck it, they've already got a functional government system that's been leading their people the whole time, why fix what isn't broken? The title of Gerudo King isn't about leadership or power. I think it's more about belonging. Because the Gerudo are a culture where every single one of them can be defined in the same way... and there is exactly one exception once a century. Men are considered to be inherently outsiders at the best of times, and more often they're enemies. A man born into this culture is a natural outsider; he is completely unique, and that means he doesn't really fit into his community. And well... when someone is fundamentally different from the rest of their community, they tend to be ostracized.

So I think that's why the position of Gerudo King exists. It isn't about them needing or even wanting a man to lead them. The title of King doesn't need to involve any leadership at all. It's about giving the man born every century a place in their society. It's a way of saying yes, you are one of us, you are a Gerudo, you belong here, you are wanted and you are loved.

The Gerudo know that every hundred years, one of their children will be fundamentally different from all of his peers. And so their society is built to ensure that a child who is completely different from them will still be loved and accepted. He will always have a place in their society. He doesn't need to earn their love, he has it just for existing. These are his people.

The title of Gerudo King isn't an inherent position of authority. It's a promise of acceptance.

[liesmyth]

@diehellasrache omg I forgot about that book. I hope you enjoy it!

[umblrspectrum]

i dont even have anything to draw in celebration that was just awesome as hell

[oceans-swim]

i need to post about the star wars/transformers parallels but not just in the sci fi media with multitudes of adaptations that center around space war way more in the "we were brothers once" "once" and

[theinvisiblemenace]

"Thank God you're home, Jack." "I would've come to you at once, Flora, but for this."

Flora Cranley & Jack Griffin, The Invisible Man (1933)

[dainesanddaffodils]

Good day my friends on this Halloween I offer you all some tender wol/estinien smut

Post-EW, minor reference to Pandaemonium | Rated E | 2,985 words

https://archiveofourown.org/works/60209821

[fallenclan]

oh! oh! i know how to do edit the save files! okay so first go into the saves folder, just called "saves", and scroll until you see a folder titled "Fallen". there'll be a bunch of files in it, ignore most of them except the one called "clan_cats"- this is where the cats are held! you can do a bunch of things here but most of them aren't relevant to getting lee into the clan- do CTRL + F to do a search function (if that doesnt work youre on a different type of computer than i am and i have no clue. sorry! D:), then just type in Lee.

there you'll see Lee, he'll have a bunch of words and stuff IGNORE THAT and change a couple things for him to join the clan:

"status": "loner" to "status": "warrior" (or elder, whichever you want, just keep it in the commas). this part is near the top, just like 5 lines down

line directly below status is "backstory"- i dont actually know what his backstory would be listed as but it doesnt matter bc you're changing it to "loner1" (keep it in the commas)

scroll like ALL the way down until you see the next character section, that'll be visible by the }, } bit- then look like 5 lines above that until you see "outside": true, set that to false instead (no commas for this bit)

and that should be it! if it doesnt work or you need more clarification D: sorry D: but hopefully its fine and then WHAM. lee has joined the clan (it wont have an event blurb about him joining btw) (it thinks he's been part of the clan like forever) (but thats fine probs) !!! - 🪶

PS: 5 bird facts please >:D

oh shit it worked. well. i guess Lee is joining the clan now

[carruni]

@loverdude i like pup a normal amount

[brinkle-brackle]

about time I threw some of my good omens art into the online ring, have a marvelous mister fell I doodled at work yesterday :D

[kewpidity]

kewpie do you know what yumeship is??

according to this handy glossary my friend mae has put together here:

夢女子/yumejoshi (dream girl): 1. noun a Japanese-originated term for a female or fem-aligned person who ships herself in a dedicated, romantic relationship with a fictional character. The male/masc-aligned term is 'yumedanshi' (dream boy). Note: Western-based communities have also developed the neutral term 'yumejin,' although a more accurate pronunciation is 'yumebito' or 'yumehito' (dream person). A neutral catchall for anyone who engages in the practice is 夢/'yume'. Other terms include 'ドリーマー’ (dreamer) and 夢者 (musha).

so kinda like selfship in the west, but with an emphasis on it being treated like a serious committed relationship specifically (i know thats not Only in the yume side of things, but this term seems to mean it Specifically)

[bibliophilea]

What do you mean, "this isn't safe"?

For @princessfanonanona Prompt: PR180 - "What do you mean this isn't safe, I'm already dead" ao3 | ffn This year, for @phicphight 2024, I am doing poems! This has all but the rhyme scheme of a villanelle; but the structure is there! I hope you enjoy!

What do you mean, "this isn't safe"? If I don't deal with this, I'm already dead.

And you've done way worse! And all to protect me! What do you mean, "this isn't safe"?

It can't be worse than what I've done— Worse than the day I died. I'm already dead.

And you'd do the same. After all, it's your plan. What do you mean, "this isn't safe"?

This would kill you—but not me. Why? Isn't it obvious? I'm already dead.

So let me do this. And no more tears for me. What do you mean, "this isn't safe"? I'm already dead.

[foreignswaggersession]

minor controversial opinion? - i don't like how the consensus opinion appears to be that grace is the bad sibling because she made a homophobic remark in episode 4. frankly, she had every right to be mean to louis in that moment. if you're my last living brother and you fail to respond to me for several years, miss every major family event, only show up sporadically at night without explanation, during which time you leave my newborn child on the ground (!!!), break the door down, and scare my other children (!!!), then it's crickets for more years and when you finally show up, it's at our mother's wake, with a young girl you picked up off the street, and you tell me you're raising her with the white guy you ran a brothel with for several years, the same white guy who crashed our last family funeral, and now you bring said white guy to our black family wake (also a racist white mob attacked the black community just happened a few years ago, if you recall, beloved brother), yes i'm gonna come at you sideways! i'm going to question whether a former brothel owner who neglects his own nieces and nephews can raise a black teenage girl with a white man who also frequents brothels please be serious. and i'm calling that white man you brought slurs. be fucking forreal!

louis doesn't get to claim victimhood in his relationship with grace b/c she was mean to him (after being the strongest ally he had left) and then made a tombstone for him when he obviously was not aging but had cut ties with the family (louis did the abandoning!). louis's primary way of demonstrating love is being present (walking paul to church every day, staying with lestat despite everything, following claudia to europe, staying with armand despite everything), and he failed to be present for grace. louis could have made an honest effort to maintain a relationship with grace without harming her. he could have come up with an explanation for his nightly visits that also explained his eyes changing color (the whole de pointe du lac family seems very chill about the supernatural). he could have at least stayed in constant communication over the phone or mail. but he didn't. and he must accept the consequences.

[watchful-crown]

it really hasn't taken long for me to become entirely enraptured by malevolent, I just finished ep6 and I'm. so normal

[celerydays]

Hiiii just wanted to say hope you’re doing well!

Haha, I'm just kidding! I am actually doing a lot better nowadays– thank you so much for sending this message to check in 🥹 I really hope that you're doing well too! 💕

I admit February was really hard for a variety of reasons, but I have my partner to thank for pulling me through because he very heavily advocated for me to just to step back for a bit, get offline, and to give myself a small daily period of rest/distraction by chipping away at our backlog of shows we've been meaning to watch 😂

As a result I've spent the last month effectively sobbing over My Hero Academia lolll 🫣 On top of that, I've been trying to fit in some of my other hobbies like journaling and tarot into my daily routines again~

Mixing in some new fictional blorbos and spreading out my attention to other activities that have been known to ~spark joy~ for me in the past has really helped to alleviate the difficulties that popped up from the last couple of months! 🥰 and as an added bonus, it shuts up my brain for a few blissful hours everyday lmao 💗