#camilla is not a princess with a girl-king

[barnbridges]

the real castle/tsh discourse in my head is always, is it camilla or marion who is a stand in for constance

[liesmyth]

the locked tomb holiday exchange rec list

Behold! The good, the magnificent, the sad! The filth and the angst and the feelings! The weird shit that would make TazMuir proud! 💀🎉✨☠️🔥🎊

Here are some favourites from a skim of works posted for @tlt-holiday-exchange, both art and fic. They are MANY and they are JUICY. Find the entire collection HERE, and keep an eye on for authors reveal coming soon!

ART FILLS

A Beautiful Fairy Tale. Wake tells little Bomb a bedtime story but she can't mention a princess without talking about guillotines. Rated T.

Dubious Curiosity. Nona is curious. Nona loves everyone. And Nona wants Cam. (Camilla/Nona) Rated M.

Fingers In Her Mouth. Camilla Hect misses the Warden. Maybe he can lend a helping hand… even in death. (Camilla/hand!Palamedes) Rated M.

just guys being bros. Camilla/Gideon. Gideon touches a boob! A very happy new year to awkward butch lesbians everywhere. Rated T.

Pyrrha Dve Appreciation. Pyrrha & Nona, soft hugs! Rated G.

Stealing Breath. Camilla/Gideon butch-off make-out session. Rated G.

To Shreds, You Say? Pyrrha/Mercymorn/Wake fucking nasty. Rated E.

FIC FILLS

a buried and a burning flame. Coronabeth fucks Gideon's corpse. Rated E.

For all intents and purposes the corpse of the Ninth’s cavalier is a bad lay. That’s all fine, though.

a grave, deep and narrow. Camilla/Palamedes, GtN AU, Character Death, Tape Recorder Conversation Redux. Podfic included! Rated T

Only Lyctors were meant to leave the First House alive. Ianthe insists on bringing Coronabeth; Judith dies of her injuries. Camilla is stranded alone at Canaan House — alone, except for the persistent hallucinations of her necromancer.

affix. Coronabeth/Harrow, humiliation kink, improper use of bones, dom!Harrow, GtN era. rated E.

Cytherea doesn't go to Canaan House AU - Corona overconfidently approaches Harrow in the hopes of exchanging lab keys. Harrow humbles her quickly.

AITA for telling my dad I didn't like my birthday party? Gideon & John, In-Universe Social Media, Character study, Rated T.

I (20F) told my dad (45?M) that I wanted a cool birthday party, but he threw me a terrible birthday party instead. Am I really the asshole for telling him I didn't like it?

and kings shall come out of thy loins. Gideon/Ianthe, crack treated seriously, body horor, SNAKES. Rated M.

Ianthe saves God from the stoma and the River and all she has to show for it are these fucking snubes.

come, dearest heart. Lyctor Palamedes AU, HtN era. Camilla/Palamedes, Pyrrha/Palamedes, Pyrrha/Camilla/Palamedes. Rated E.

In Canaan House, Palamedes Sextus unwillingly ascends to Lyctorhood to put an end to Cytherea the First's rampage. He's left heartbroken, grieving, and terribly, terribly lonely.

Don't Care If You Think I'm Dumb (I Don't Care At All). Gideon/Ianthe, Gideon as Kiriona, Unwholesome Tower Princes Bonding ft. bad sex and retail therapy. Rated E.

The newly christened Kiriona Gaia is not having a good time on the Mithraeum. At least she has Ianthe there to make her worse.

Follow Your Dreams, Never Let Them Die. Gideon/Harrow, Pokemon trainers AU! Rated T.

On her Pokemon Journey, Gideon Nav approaches the mysterious Drearburh City Gym - but something feels oddly familiar.

Gaia's Natural Market. modern AU, retail hell, Harrow/Gideon, Harrow/Ianthe, Gideon/Ianthe. Rated T

RING-A-DING-DING, the Holiday's are here! And nothing says "Give!" like the bounty of the Mother Herself, so come on by to GAIA's Natural Market! Treat your family to a home-cooked meal with only the PUREST of ingredients - all Produce Organic, all Products non-GMO, and all Smiles Authentic and free of Toxins!

Good Girl. Coronabeth/Ianthe, puppyplay, muzzles, rated E.

Coronabeth is Ianthe's big dicked bimbo puppy. Ianthe's into it.

Goodnight, New Rho. Camilla & Nona. Domestic Fluff, Missing Scene. Rated G.

Nona gets a bedtime story. Camilla reminisces about growing up with an older sister. They both sleep well, despite a notable lack of dogs.

In the Empire of the Deeps. Gideon/Nona/Ianthe, Gideon/Ianthe, Pirate AU, monsterfucking-adjacent, Nona is an eldritch sea creature. Rated E.

A chance encounter on the beach. Ianthe is manipulative, Kiriona is sad, and Nona is not as innocent as she seems. Sometimes, you might yearn for one person and meet another one. Sometimes, you have to take what you can get.

just like normal. Ianthe/Coronabeth, Cytherea is also there. Penis in vagina sex, Exhibitionism, Squirting. Rated E.

Ianthe gives herself a cock, and Corona is increasingly bewildered that she hasn’t been allowed to sit on it yet.

language of its own. Camilla/Palamedes. Worldbuilding, idiots to lovers, pre-canon. Rated T.

Camilla Hect has to do an erotic poetry final.

Masochism Tango. Porn with feelings, knifeplay, vivisection, lyctor-typical everything. Rated E.

Two occasions in which Pyrrha Dve had the pleasure of being under Cytherea's knife, and Mercymorn had the pleasure of Pyrrha Dve.

METHODS OF SUBDUCTION. Judith/Cornabeth, Judith & Varun. Planetary science rizz. Rated M.

Varun the Eater teaches Judith Deuteros how to flirt.

midnight mass. Mercymorn/Cristabel, pre-canon, Character Study. Rated T.

A lifetime before the resurrection and two decades before the apocalypse, a novice nun and a third-year medical student discuss goodness, passion, and salvation at midnight on Christmas morning.

motherhood. Mercymorn uses flesh magic on Wake. Hate sex ensues. Body horror, motherhood as violence, canon compliant. Rated E.

“I will kill you,” you say, with all the placid fervor of a religious convert. When you’re on the edge of real violence, you lose that tense little furrow in your brow—it’s beautiful, really. “Please give me a reason.”

My Love Overflows. Corona/Ianthe, Strap-on, Dirty talk, Impact Play, Hair Pulling, Bladder control. Rated E.

The one in which Corona pisses all over herself at Ianthe's whims.

name and rank. Judith/Coronabeth, Judith & Varun. Judith's failwoman swag! Rated T.

As Judith lies dying, she has nothing but time. Varun the Eater uses it to teach her how to flirt with the Princess. Don’t worry. Varun has got this!

New Rule. Mercymorn/Pyrrha, Ranch AU, stablehand Pyrrha, boss/employee relationship. Rated E.

Never hire stablehands who are too handsome and capable for their own good.

no shade in the shadow of the cross. Cytherea/Mercymorn, angst, fisting, two pillow princesses NOT making it work! Rated E.

Cytherea and Mercymorn have an ill-timed tryst.

per my last email. Camilla/Palamedes. Academia, banter. On peer review and multitasking. Rated M.

“Warden,” she said patiently, “you want me so badly it’s making you stupid."

RISKING OUR LIVES FOR UNIVERSITY HOLE???? 🤯😳 University AU, Team 69. The hole is a basement to be clear! Rated T.

The difficult part of visiting the local haunted house for a feature in the university magazine is not actually the visiting; it’s the writing about it afterwards.

So Messed Up. Ianthe/Coronabeth. Puppy play, collars & leashes, tail plug. Rated E.

Ianthe using her flesh magic to give Corona a big cock for petplay because she loves the idea of her sister being a big dicked bimbo puppy girl who just wants to rut into her.

The Great Gamete Gambit. Camilla & Palamedes, Pre-canon, worldbuilding, sixth house reproductive practices. Rated G.

Palamedes and Camilla have an important package to send, but there's been a heist in the gamete repository! Can the 15-year-old Master Warden and his cavalier crack the case?

The Sextus Scandal. Camilla/Palamedes, Epistolary, Pre-Canon Divergence. Rated E.

Transcripts and documents relating to the disciplinary hearing and subsequent resignation of Master Warden Palamedes Sextus.

Ways to Be Perfect. Babs/Colum Asht, GtN era, Rated M.

When Naberius first glanced across the supper table at Colum Asht, he didn’t immediately get the impression that he was liked.

The end!

Thank you for making it this far. If you enjoyed any of these works, or anything else in the collection, please drop a comment to make our creators feel appreciated <3

[post creators reveal exchange wrap post]

[inconspicious-random-thoughts]

They are Sinners, Not Heartless

What I love about Hazbin Hotel is the relationships we see. Either romantic, friendly to found family.

The show is about sinners going about their day in Hell. By all means, the worst of mankind, all converge in a singler area of depriverity. It easy to walk into to show expecting characters to be cutthroat, out for themselves and just be heartless to everyone.

But because a person has committed sins, doesn't mean the soul lack the greater qualities of mankind. That the soul can be a fairly decent person but wasn't virtuous enough to pass divine judgment. Or that a soul can commit heinous acts but can still have a heart.

It's interesting to watch the worst of mankind and watch them have some character growth. Or at least, witness the worst being grown to care about others.

Well start with Lucifer, the literlay king of Hell. The devil. But look how proud and adoring his daughter.

The sin of Pride, proud of his daughter.

Then you have the princess of Hell, who cares too much for everyone

two people who found love in Hell.

Then you have Sir Pentious who seem to have genuine feelings for Cherri and not driven by lust. Sacrificing himself to try to protect her and his friends.

He loves his minions

You have a group of sinners, one of them being a former overlord, who grew to care about each other and became a family. Trying to support and protect each other. Even Cherri who not in the main gang, risked her own life and safety to help Angel.

look at Husk spreading his wings to shield the other two.

Then you have the overlords, who are lead to believe are the worst of the sinners if they were able to use and kill other sinners others to climb there way to the top.

I love Camilla.

Seriously how is no one talking about Camilla including Zestial that she'll keep him safe and protected.

You have the disrespecting little shits of the Vees even forming their own family. I originally thought they were only tolerating each other for business but then they regularly hang out and support each other and their interest.

I hate how cute they are! Were suppose to not love them...they are antagonist!

Then you have Alastor, the overlord who sins are most heinous that he feels no remorse for and in fact, is given pleasure from. Arguably meant to be the worst sinner we witness living in Hell so far. But then We see, that even the worst Sinner is shown to have heart.

girl dad supporting his adoptive girl in the sidelines.

They are so cute together

Best platonic soulmates

I just love how some of these characters are meant to be the most deplorable beings but still have hearts. That they stand by their love ones to protect and support. It brings me so much joy and heartwarming to watch.

[thebadboyfanclub]

An Eye For An Eye (Daemon x Reader)

I would suggest to listen to “shameless” by camilla cabello and then switch to “skyfall” by Adele to really get the vibe I’m going for. Enjoy!

The words of the house Tully were clear as sky “Family. Duty. Honour” one must serve their family for the good of all, to bring honour and uphold the peace. Those words fall heavy upon a young girls shoulders, when Daemon first laid eyes on (y/n) he was astonished, her long reddish hair that was a staple at the Tully family glistened under the sun while her eyes shined with ambition and hope, such a pleasant sight it was to see her up on her horse trotting around, she reminded him of everything that was good in this world.

(Y/n) had noticed how the prince kindly offered his arm every time they walked, how he would always compliment something about her that he seemed to notice on that particular morrow. (Y/n) secretly prayed every night that prince Daemon would ask for her hand, she had come to court with her father to find a lord husband, she had come of age and was time that she completed her duty.

“I am to marry the lady (y/n) Tully”

King Viserys announced as he smiled fondly at the girl. She wished that the ground would split beneath her feet and swallow her whole, her gaze shifted to prince Daemon whom looked equally shattered by the news, they had spend so much time together, he had been her rock for all those days and king Viserys had only accompanied her couple of times, how could he be interested in her? Daemon wanted to flip the table upside down swoop (y/n) of her feet, get her on his dragon and fly away to live together forever.

“What delightful news, what an honour this is for you my dear daughter”

Her father felt invincible, his daughter was to be queen of the seven kingdoms, she had exceeded his expectations and would bring the house Tully to such high rank. (Y/n) wanted to burst into tears, alas she covered it with a subtle smile as she stared at the floor, excusing her despair with shyness, everyone was delighted for (y/n), except her.

-

“What seems to trouble you, your grace?”

She scoffed at the sound of those words, it was never her wish to become queen, king Viserys was a good man but old and had no type of connection with her. Her wedding night was supposed to be the happiest day of her life, now there’s she was out in the gardens with her lord husband passed out from Dornish wine, what a mess her life had come to be.

“Don’t patronise me”

“I am not, you should be happy”

“you should be as well, you got to marry the future heir princess Rhaenyra”

“Rhaenyra is a wonderful match on paper, kind, passionate, strong”

“If you came here to torture me feel free to leave”

Daemon puffed out a breath, as (y/n) stood in her night gown in the grass with her back turned to him he could not help but curse himself, he should have declared his love to her faster, now both of them doomed in marriages with people they liked but did not love.

As he placed his hands on her forearms her flesh felt like the finest silk, his touch brought goosebumps down her spine while inhaling a sharp breath, she slowly turned to look at him, her eyes were puffy and her nose was red, he despised seeing her like this, yet his lustful gaze could not help but fall down her exposed neckline, her flesh was teasing him.

As Daemon leaned in his nose touched hers, their breaths became shallow as their relished the intimacy between them, they could feel each others hearts pound in their chest. He went down even further to place a few kisses down her neck and stop to place the last on on her collarbone, earning a low moan from (y/n) as she closed her eyes and almost melted down.

Daemons left hand slid down to her waist and gripped her to come closer to him, if anyone were to see them they would die before the sun had risen, yet they stood close to one another unable to find the strength to pull away.

“I do not want Rhaenyra, I need you”

“Please Daemon don’t make this harder than it already is, we must honour our wedlock”

“What is honour compared to a woman’s love?”

“I-I”

“Should leave?”

“Yes”

She breathed, although he words said one thing her body came even closer to him while her grip tightened, Daemon smirked since he understood that (y/n) wanted to stay, he could see it in her eyes that she wouldn’t move an inch away from him.

“Then go”

Daemon remarked but (y/n) shut him up with a deep kiss, Daemon was caught off guard yet he responded positively, call it wine courage or just a moment of weakness Daemon craved her touch and passion, her kiss soft and warm and her touch eager, she was clinging on to him as a way to forget of her awful destiny.

He made her his that night, with her back against the wall at a corner of the garden, to see her desperately try to contain her groans as she dug her nails to his skin, she had to admit it felt liberating to allow herself to do what she pleased, the passion led her to a dangerous path that (y/n) had chosen and would not go back now.

Her kisses were intoxicating to him, her naked form was his heaven as he drove to roads unknown to the young bride, a bite of the forbidden fruit was his new shame that was perfectly mixed with a taste of divinity, the sounds she made were music to his ears as he held her close, sweating and panting as they hugged one another for a little while longer, savouring the moment.

She ran to her room after, with her nightgown almost torn to pieces as she held it together for her privates parts to no be exposed, what has she done?

That night she cut a small part of her inner thing to bleed on the bed, her lord husband was to drunk to remember and everyone would believe their marriage had been consummated. The next morrow when the maids came to collect the sheets and word spread Daemon smiled in triumph, their little secret was safe.

-

Daemon had stayed close to her, well as much as he possibly could. Sneaking out at the hour of the wolf to meet her in secret pathways, to steal a moment with (y/n), they had promised countless times that it was the last time, none of them could stay away for long, the rope of destiny tightened around them compelling them to run to each others arms, to lay together and feel each others naked bodies against their, the fire that burned them took over and soon jealousy creeped in which could be very confusing especially when they were both wed.

(Y/n) still remembered when Rhaenyra announced her pregnancy a month after her, the harsh slap on the face Daemon had gotten once he met with her underground.

“How could you? You promised me!”

“(Y/n) get a hold of yourself, you knew that this would happen”

“A month after my pregnancy? You are cruel Daemon”

“I am cruel? I have to sit here and watch my brother claim my child as his”

(Y/n) had broken down in his arms in her delirium she repeated her apologies as Daemon kept her tucked away in his arms to soothe her. Her belly had grown round and he couldn’t help but tear up as he saw the love of his life cry in his arms, the Gods had planned a barbaric game for them.

Her beddings with her lord husband were awful, still if you asked the king he would say how his lady wife was full of fire and how he thought the whole castle would hear her moans.

What Viserys didn’t know was that (y/n) closed her eyes tightly and imagined Daemon was at his place, that she was once again at the young princes chambers and was touched and kissed by the silver haired prince.

He had tried to be there for the birth of his children, the excuse was “to support his brother”, he could still vividly recall the birth of his first son, as the brothers paced outside the room while they could hear (y/n)s screams of agony. Daemon could not contain himself when he heard the cries of his babe, he burst into the room to find the maester holding a bloody baby with his brother right behind him.

“Congratulations your grace you have a son”

Viserys, relieved by the news for the arrival of his heir had ran to take a look at the babe while Daemon went to (y/n)s side, the poor girl had buried herself in the pillows and had closed her eyes from tiredness.

“How are you?”

“I did it”

“You did it dear”

They had 4 children together, first was Baelon, second came another boy Aelor, the third was once again a healthy boy Aemond and last was a girl saera. Daemon had been close to the children, closer than king Viserys had been, he loved his children but they were from his second marriage, none of them could heal the wound of losing his greatest love.

(y/n) had been a wonderful wife she took care of their children and cared for her husband as he grew to be weakened by the illness, no one dared to question (y/n)s loyalty to her lord husband.

Rhaenyra despised the bond (y/n) and Daemon had, she had no proof of adultery still she did not appreciate how tender Daemon was with her fathers wife, Rhaenyra had noticed how Daemon gawked at (y/n), he never did that with her, especially when their children played together and one might get hurt by playing a tad too rough, it didn’t matter who’s fault was it Daemon would always side with (y/n)s kids, it brought constant fight and arguments between Daemon and Rhaenyra.

This night was no different, Daemon had left his shared chamber with Rhaenyra after an argument and had ran to the arms of his lover. (y/n) had just returned to her chamber by a knight that pleaded for the queen to follow him, (y/n) clearly disheveled did not have time to change out of her nightgown and ran wherever the knight went only to find her child Aemond with the maester who was stitching up his eye.

“What is the meaning of this!? Who did this to you my love?”

She kneeled in front of her son who was squirming under the maester from the pain, Aemond could not focus on his mother but held her hand tightly for comfort and strength.

“It will heal, right maester?”

“The eye is gone but the flesh will heal”

(Y/n) lost it at that sentence, someone had taken her sons eye and no one dared to speak up about it. (Y/n) rose to her feet while still holding her sons hand as tight as she could.

“I demand to know who did this”

“It was Viserys mother”

Aemond whispered. (Y/n)s eyes focused on the boy with the bloody nose, Rhaenyra placed herself in front of her son in order to protect him from the queens gaze that was full of fury.

“Aemond had raised a rock at my son, he was forced to defend himself”

“Aemond, listen to me my love. What happened?”

A moment of silence fell as (y/n) questioned her son, Aemond was always a quiet boy, he mostly kept to himself due to the torment he got from Rhaenyras son due to the fact that he did not have a dragon yet, (y/n) knew her son was destined to become a dragon rider still the boys confidence seemed to slowly wither away, this behaviour was unlike him.

“He called us bastards mother”

Her older son Aelor spoke up, he was there when the fight happened, Aelor and Aemond were playing with Aelors dragon running around the beast careless when Rhaenyras sons started to tease Aemond. Aelor stood up for his brother when Rhaenyras oldest son Aegon called them bastards.

Aemond was always his mothers son, at the accusation he got a rock and wanted to throw it at his nephews, push came to shove and Viserys pulled out his blade and cut Aemonds eye out.

“You little pig”

(Y/n) was known to have a temper, at the vile word something in her brain ticked, the same blade that was used on her son laid on the stand next to her, probably taken from the boy by force. Now (y/n) had gotten a hold of it and ran towards the boy, Rhaenyra caught (y/n)s hand that held the knige preventing her from harming her son as (y/n) let out a roar that almost shook the ground beneath them.

Chaos erupted as the guards did not know who to protect, the queen or the heir, orders yelled at one another as the women stood in the middle fighting for the upper hand, a mother was fighting a mother.

“Over my dead body”

“Your low life son cause harm to my child, it’s better to cut the weed by the root and that root would be you”

(Y/n) had gone mad, as she held the blade high and aimed it at Rhaenyra to harm her, (y/n)s instinct to protect her children had managed to take over her brain and reside to cruelty Daemons hand was the one that grasped it before she struck the princess, he was the only one that dared to approach the scene and prevent (y/n) from doing something she might regret.

“(Y/n), release the dagger”

“No”

(Y/n) responded as tears ran down her cheeks. Her life was crumbling before her as her love affair was slowly coming up to the light of truth, this put the life of her children to danger and she was the one to blame, she had to act before anything worst happened and if that meant to kill the princess and sacrifice her own life then so be it.

“(Y/n) this will not bring Aemonds eye back”

“An eye for an eye”

(Y/n) was at the point of no return, as she growled the threat Rhaenyra feared this was a fight that would end her. Daemon could not risk this any longer, if (y/n) hurts anyone she would be punished severely.

Daemon went to pull (y/n) by her waist making the blade nick Rhaenyra by the sudden shove causing Rhaenyras arm to bleed.

Daemon held (y/n) as she moved around ferociously to free herself from him and throwing the knife away, she pulled at his hands that prevented her from getting at Rhaenyra.

“Let me go Daemon!”

Daemon did not budge under (y/n)s erratic manner, he patiently waited for the queen to tire herself out which was inevitable, (y/n) slowly collapsed to the floor with Daemon breaking her fall as she broke down to sobs, if anyone were to describe the scene the queen looked like an animal protecting her cub, such a sad yet empowering scene, (y/n) would go to extreme lengths to protect her children from anyone even if that meant to go against the princess.

Daemon still held her as (y/n) cried, one reason was because he feared anger would soon swoop in again and she would try to get to the princess or Viserys and the other reason was to calm her, his insides curled at the sight of his son injured and his lover broken on the floor.

As Daemon looked up from (y/n) he was met with Rhaenyras hateful hues, if she could throw spikes from her eyes Daemon and (y/n) would lay dead on the floor, he defended her once again, to Rhaenyras mind this sealed her instinct to be true.

Viserys did not know what to do, his own daughter had accused his wife of adultery, his wife attempted to murder his daughter, his son harmed by his grandson, the family has been officially divided and would probably never heal after this event.

“He is our son! Do something!”

(Y/n) yelled in between her sobs. Most of the people in this room assumed she called for the king, only Daemon could understand she called for him, however his hands were tied, he had already risked exposure by holding her back instead of protecting his wife.

The king with the assistance of his cane walked to his grandson, the only thing you could hear was (y/n)s hiccups and sobs while her forehead touched the ground, she had lost herself in the fear of her children’s life mixed with anger.

“If anyone questions my childrens legitimacy again I will have their tongues removed, do I make myself clear Viserys?”

The scared boy could only nod frantically while Rhaenyra remained still with a stiff lip, holding her wound with her other hand to stop the bleeding, still a few drops of blood managed to fall on the ground.

(Y/n) raised her head to face the wounded princess, her chest rose and sunk in haste as she looked terrifying due to her face forming the anger she experienced, she was smiling like a mad person.

“My dearest daughter, I want to remind you… I am a patient woman”

Requests are open!

[princessanneftw]

Zara Tindall’s best friend to be appointed as lady in waiting to the Princess Royal

NHS midwife Dolly Maude, who delivered Tindall child on bathroom floor, previously wore joky ‘lady in waiting’ badge on day at the races

By Camilla Tominey for the Daily Telegraph

She once turned up to the races with her best friend Zara Tindall wearing a playful badge bearing the words ‘Lady in Waiting’.

A spokesman for the royal was later forced to clarify: “It was a joke. Zara doesn’t have any sort of lady in waiting.”

But now Dolly Maude, an NHS nurse who helped to deliver Mrs Tindall’s third child, Lucas, on the bathroom floor at her Gatcombe Park home in 2021, has been well and truly welcomed into the royal fold.

Despite the high jinks at Cheltenham last January, the 51-year-old mother of four has been appointed as a lady in waiting to Mrs Tindall’s mother, the Princess Royal.

The Telegraph understands that Buckingham Palace will announce the appointment in the Court Circular on Feb 1, when Mrs Maude will be revealed as one of four newly appointed ladies in waiting to the King’s sister, to replace others who have retired.

A lady in waiting is an attendant to a female member of the Royal family who acts as a companion on royal engagements as well as helping with their day-to-day duties.

Mrs Maude was maid of honour when the Princess Royal’s daughter married Mike Tindall, in 2011, and helped to deliver Lucas when his birth did not quite go to plan.

Mr Tindall described the birth on his The Good, The Bad & The Rugby podcast, saying: “Fortunately Zara’s friend Dolly is, she’s actually more important than I am at making sure she’s been at all three of my children’s births. She was there and recognised that we wouldn’t have got to the hospital in time, so it was run into the gym, get a mat, get into the bathroom, towels down, brace brace brace!”

One of Mrs Maude’s friends said: “She’s such a great girl. For the Princess Royal, it’s a perfect fit because of their shared love of dogs and horses.

“She’s not only extremely close to Zara, she also gets on brilliantly with the Princess. She’s fiercely loyal and discreet. It’s a great match.”

Mrs Maude and her husband Chris have four children. Billy, 26, attended Swansea University; Nell, 24, studied at the Central School of Ballet; Ted, 17, is, like his mother, a keen skier. He was a page boy at the Tindall wedding and Mrs Tindall is his godmother. Their youngest daughter, Mary, 15, is studying for her GCSEs.

Mrs Maude is occasionally spotted looking after Mrs Tindall’s children Mia, who turns 10 this month, five-year-old Lena and Lucas, at equestrian events.

Three years ago it was revealed that the Princess Royal, who carries out the second highest number of royal engagements a year after the monarch, had 11 ladies in waiting, two of whom had worked for Her Royal Highness for more than 50 years, three for more than 40 years, and five for more than 30 years.

Traditionally, ladies in waiting would be the wives or daughters of peers but they can also be a cousin or close friend.

When Queen Elizabeth II died, it was announced that Queen Camilla would not have ladies in waiting but instead be attended by Queen’s “companions”, and that their role would be much more informal.

[clumsy-jiminie]

ɪɴᴇᴠɪᴛᴀʙʟʏ ʏᴏᴜʀꜱ | ᴘᴊᴍ | ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴛᴇɴ

❝ ɢᴇɴᴛʟᴇ ꜰʟᴀᴍᴇꜱ ❞

↣ summary :: Kiara Smith had dreamed of true love for as long as she could remember. from being obsessed with the Disney princesses who found affection in the strangest situations to dressing up as a bride from kindergarten to fourth grade. it was the only thing she ever truly desired, so much so that a pleasant smile and kind eyes could have her smitten in seconds. right when she thought she found the one, a chance encounter with Park Jimin—the city’s famously perfect fuck boy with a smile so warm and a heart of ice—has her feeling quite the opposite. he knocks her off her axis and derails her life as she knows it, yet the universe seems to have another plan for the two.

↣ rating :: 18+

↣ genre :: fluff, angst, smut, e2l, slow burn

↣ pairing :: business owner!jimin x fem!artist!oc ft. taehyung

↣ word count :: 4.7k

↣ chapter warnings :: mature language, questionable yoga poses, sexual fantasying, intimacy

↣ notes :: :) surprise :) the amount of sexual tension in this chapter makes me wanna smush their faces together and yell KISS ALREADY also JIN IS BACK JIN IS HOME WORLD WIDE HANDSOME HAS RETURNED 🥳 I was so happy to see our king of chaos return and spend some time with the rest of the boys!

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if you have any questions, comments, or concerns PLEASE don't hesitate to message me or send me an ask! my inbox is always open. 💖

"you're watching, I feel it. I know I shouldn't stare. I picture your hands on me. I think I wanna let it happen."

-liar, camilla cabello-

Amber eyes met with chocolate irises. After staring at each other with a widened gaze of disbelief, both pairs respectfully narrowed at each other.

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

Kiara dropped whatever stretch she was about to do, turning to face the blonde man who seemed equally, if not more, annoyed than the girl.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" She whispered harshly so she wouldn't cause a scene.

Jimin couldn't help but tilt his head to the side curiously, switching arms to stretch the other one out. "I thought it was pretty obvious."

Her eyes burned a hole into him. "No shit! I meant here, at this studio, when there are hundreds, if not thousands, of other ones!"

The man shrugged, "This one was in the area. Technically, I should be asking you what you're doing here. Aren't you supposed to be in Long Island?"

Kiara opened her mouth and prepared for a slick response, but the words died on her tongue. He had a point, but she wouldn't let him know. All she wanted was to relax; with everything else going on in her life, this was the one place guaranteed to provide some tranquillity. But now that was tainted by the blonde's mere existence.

It was like the universe was playing some sick joke on the woman, interweaving her life with someone as insufferable as him. Her existence became a reality TV show for the gods above and below, making Kiara and Jimin the main characters. 

"What happened to your hair?" Jimin asked suddenly, filling the air of silence that grew between them. He had only checked out the woman because her hair caught his attention. So curly, wild, and free—he liked it, but it was Kiara's, so he couldn't. No matter how much he wanted to pull on her curls strand by strand to watch them recoil back to the loose spring. Plus, Kiara had straight hair—she always had straight hair—she couldn't just suddenly change it on him.

"Fuck off," she quipped while she placed her hands on her hips for a moment. Kiara didn't wear her hair curly for this exact reason; someone always had something to say about it. Whether it was white women and children reaching out to touch it without her permission, black men insisting she was anything other than black when trying to talk to her, and random Hispanic people speaking straight Spanish to her as if she understood. Kiara didn't like the attention it brought her. That's why she kept it straight. The only thing people would do was compliment her hair. The less attention, the better.

She inhaled deeply through her nose, trying to find the calmness she once had before Park Jimin had entered. If she couldn't, she would hightail it out of here and back to Little Latte to give Jeongguk an earful. She knew she should've stayed at his place and made his bed into a lovely, comfy depression nest. An overwhelming feeling sat in her gut as soon as Jeongguk mentioned the outside world. 

"Was it on purpose? Like you meant to walk outside like that?" Jimin started to lean side to side casually, hiding the smirk that desperately wanted to form on his lips. 

Kiara glared at the blonde, her fiery gaze meeting his playful one. So he thinks this is a joke? "Fuck you and ya motha."

"Oooh," Jimin chuckled, hiding his attraction to her accent. It was the first time he heard it so prominently. Did she know she had a voice that deserved to be in porn? He could listen to just her speaking with no direction at all and get off. "Insulting people's mother's now? Someone's a little feisty."

"You're right," she stepped off her mat and bent over, beginning to roll it up. Jimin's eyes lingered over the woman for more than what was appropriate. "Your mother is probably a wonderful lady. I bet she tried everything for you not to grow up a pretentious asshole, but unfortunately," she grabbed her mat and water bottle, "some thing's can't be helped."

Jimin's upper lip twitched, threatening to curl from the bold assumption that his mother was anything excellent. He should’ve told her off—let her know just how painfully wrong she was—but that little smirk playing on her lips stole the words from his tongue. All he could do was sigh deeply, exhaling all the words he wanted to say as he stared into those eyes of gold that threatened him as much as his own. Just as she stepped away from him, assuming the woman was going to leave so they both could have peace, a door opened. The duo turned their head towards the noise that interrupted their tension.

"Good morning, my blessed rays of sunshine and daring rainbows!" A short girl with wavy dark brown hair walked in, followed by a tall man with deep skin. With the amount of pep in her step, one would think she was skipping. She made her way to the front of the room, standing before the mirror on top of a mat. The woman was very petite, standing at 4'10 at most. In contrast, the man beside her had to be at least 6 feet tall. It was an odd couple, but Kiara didn't care as much as she wondered why there were two instructors instead of one.

The woman smiled brightly at the room as the chatting people from earlier slowly started to join the center. "It's an honor to have you join us for this couples class."

The duo's eyes widened with disbelief before releasing an aspirated sigh. "Ah, shit," they mumbled as they looked around the room. Everyone had a partner beside them, leaving them as the only pair. 

"Today's class is designed for you and your partner to sync until you are one."

Kiara quickly raised her hand, promptly grabbing the instructors' attention. They nodded towards her, prompting her to speak. "What if you don't have a partner?"

The room erupted in tiny giggles like she said a joke, but Kiara's face remained unchanged. She stared at the two instructors, jaw clenched with an unamused expression spread amongst her features. She folded her arms over her chest, waiting for whatever response the two would conjure up.

"Oh, you were serious?" The man asked before Kiara nodded. He pursed his lips briefly before his eyes landed on the man beside her. Jimin looked at Kiara, wondering where she expected this route to lead her. It was only until the overwhelming feeling of someone staring at you that he pulled his gaze away from the girl and looked at the male instructor. "Do you have a partner?"

The blonde's eyes went wide before he cleared his throat. "Well, no, but—"

"Ah! So problem solved!" The male grinned before looking off at the rest of the class.

"No!" Kiara's voice pipped up before the female instructor could speak. "Problem not solved! Problem far from solved!"

"You're welcome to walk out," the short woman stated. She stared at the other woman, her warm blue eyes freezing over suddenly. That didn't stop Kiara from bending over again, preparing to gather her things until the woman's voice cut through the air. "But we don't offer refunds here."

Kiara stopped and froze, debating for a moment before slowly standing up. She had to dip into her savings fund to pay for this class, and she didn't want to waste money she shouldn't have been spending in the first place. Her shoulders dropped in defeat as she realized she was not only going to be stuck in the same room with Park Jimin, sober, for a whole hour, but now she was also to be his partner.

"Problem solved?" The female instructor asked with a tone of impatience lingering behind her words. Kiara nodded silently. The woman's eyes then traveled to Jimin, who met her gaze with a glare. She raised a questioning brow, tempting him to take a chance and try her also. And Jimin would've. He didn't need the money, nor cared so much for the class. He could've left, found another class at a neighboring yoga studio, and pretended he never ran into Ms. Kiara. But that was the issue. All it took was one glance at the woman who seemed to shrink into herself from embarrassment.

Jimin tilted his head back as he shut his eyes, letting out a small sigh of defeat. He placed his hands on his hips, gathering all the positive energy lingering in his system. He looked at the instructor once more, offering her his charming smile. "Problem solved."

The instructors seemed pleased, going on to resume their introduction to the class. Kiara found herself slowly shuffling towards Jimin. She leaned in subtly towards him. "Just so you know," she whispered, "I'm going to hate every second of this."

Jimin stifled back a dry scoff. "Likewise."

After the introduction, the instructors started the class with a simple breathing exercise. They demonstrated the position, causing Kiara's eyes to widen before she glanced at the blonde man beside her, who did not react. Soon, everyone, including Jimin and Kiara, got onto their mats and copied their position.

Kiara stared at Jimin while he avoided her gaze completely before cautiously sliding into his lap. The instructor pulled the shades on the window down, blocking out the natural sunlight before dimming the fluorescent lights. Speakers quietly played calm notes of guitar strings plucking and wind instruments. Despite the elements around them, the duo was anything but relaxed. Kiara tensed at the feeling of Jimin's hands on her back while hers wrapped around his neck loosely. Jimin tried to steady his breathing, praying that she couldn't feel how fast his heart was beating. They don't like each other; they haven't liked each other for months, so why did he need to feel close to her?

Kiara inhaled deeply, letting her eyes shut as her breathing began to sync with Jimin's. It was fast at first and slightly concerning until her fingers absentmindedly found the little hairs on his nape. He seemed to relax at the feeling of her fingertips stroking his hair. For the first time today, Kiara felt some sort of peace.

She wanted to pretend it was Taehyung's arms wrapped around her. She wanted to pretend it was his hands gently rubbing against her cool skin, warming her. She wanted to pretend it was his incredibly addictive scent she was breathing in. The sweet smell of citrus and pineapple colliding with a slight spice of black pepper and juniper berries with a heavy hint of vanilla lingering in the background was comforting. Disrespectfully intoxicating. Soothing. She wanted to pretend, but she couldn't.

All of his qualities were opposite of Jimin's.

Taehyung was naturally rougher and more dominating. Slow moments like this didn't come often, and if they did, it would always end with a hand on her ass or boob, groping her and telling her how horny he is. Sometimes, she just wanted to be held, to feel skin against hers in the most innocent ways. She didn't want her body to only be touched for someone else's pleasure. 

Her boyfriend also smelled like a teenager who put on too much axe body spray. Kiara preferred something sweeter, more inviting, and easier on the nose, while Taehyung wanted people to smell him before he entered the room. His colognes contained more notes of cedar woods, bergamot, and various citruses—powerful and entirely too much for Kiara. Maybe that's why she found herself snuggling closer to Jimin, her nose pressing against the crook of his neck, causing the area to tense from her simple touch.

"Someone's close," Jimin whispered lowly, causing a pleasant chill to run down her spine. She didn't know his voice could get deeper, and it was a dangerous ability for him to have. His silk voice was already soothing on the ears, but this made it far more enjoyable.

"That's the whole point of the exercise," she mumbled, subconsciously pushing her body against his.

Jimin inhaled sharply, her curls tickling the tip of his nose. He couldn't slow his heart. He couldn't stop his mind, not while she was this close to him. All he could think about was how divine she smelled—a delicate mix of berries with hints of whipped vanilla. Sweetness seemed to be her signature, which he didn't mind. He just ran his fingers up and down her spine, instinctively pulling her closer by her hips. The woman couldn't help the gasp that escaped from her lips as her fingertips gripped his black shirt.

Kiara shouldn't be enjoying this. It was wrong on so many levels. Still, she couldn't help but let her eyes flutter close as she melted into his embrace. She imagined a world where the events leading to their distaste for each other didn't occur. A world where Jimin met her before Taehyung. A world where his gentle touch was normalized, yet still made goosebumps arise on her skin as if it was foreign.

The instructor's voice cut through their moment of peace, placing them back in the reality where they disliked each other. Their separation was slow, almost as if their bodies were rejecting the idea of it. Kiara's eyes met Jimin's briefly before she slid onto the floor and to the space beside him. 

The class continued with some regular solo poses before another couple exercise. Kiara sighed deeply, dreading the moment she had to feel Jimin's hands against her skin. This is what she should be feeling, right? Then why did it feel forced?

The class watched as the male instructor demonstrated the pose. It was relatively easy, like the first one, yet Kiara's face flushed with heat. This class was truly meant for couples. She wondered if Taehyung would be interested in attending one with her, but she already knew his answer would be no. The activity was too boring, and with the closeness he would convince them to ditch and never return.

"You nervous or something?" Jimin whispered, sounding almost genuine as he pulled her from her thoughts.

"No!" She snapped at him quietly.

His brows furrowed as he gestured towards the space in front of him. "Then get in position." His tone matched hers without a second thought. 

The woman glared at him despite being the one to start the trouble. Regardless, she did as she was told and stood before him. Sweat began to form in the palms of her hands as she felt his hand rest on her hip. She took a deep breath, slowly bending forward as the hand resting in the middle of her back guided her. She grasped her toes between her fingers while keeping her knees straight, causing the back of her legs to stretch. Typically, this was a very relaxing pose, and she usually would've gone a step further and wrapped her arms around her calves, almost pulling her head between her legs. Jimin's presence was a distraction—too significant not to notice—stopping her from stretching further. He wasn't doing much, but his hands gently persuaded her to continue the stretch by applying light pressure on her back while her other hand firmly kept her in place to ensure she didn't lose balance. It caused her face to flush, the feeling of his hands so gentle yet so commanding.

Curiosity flooded Kiara's mind briefly, leading her to glance at the mirror before them. And god, she wished she hadn't. It was enough that she found Jimin attractive—you'd have to be blind to say he wasn't—but with his dark eyes peering over her frame as he stood directly behind her and his brows somewhat furrowed with his head tilted to the side a bit, Kiara was surprised she didn't turn bright red at the sight. Her mind strolled to a dark area, wondering if this were the picture an onlooker would see if he was fucking her from behind. Her heart pounded against her ribcage as she quickly looked away. She cursed at herself softly, knowing that specific scene would plague her thoughts for the next few nights.

Jimin inhaled deeply, trying to convince himself to remain calm. She was such a sight to see already, but bent over? It took every ounce of concentration he had not to allow blood to run opposite from his head. Despite wanting to fill the gap between them and press his hips against the woman, he stayed frozen in place. You know better, rang through his head like a mantra. Curse this class for being so sexually charged, as if couples couldn't also mean a pair of friends who like yoga as well. It felt as if the instructors were punishing the duo for speaking up against them. Although, he was pleasantly surprised with how flexible the woman was. He prayed for the moment when the instructors called for a new position, not wanting to deal with this level of torture any longer. And when they finally did, he only removed his hand from her back, allowing her to return to an upright position slowly. He watched Kiara through lowered lids. Why did it seem as if everything she did was purposely seductive? It was like the girl had lust running through her system, expressed through the way she moved and spoke. Jimin didn't back off until he got a face full of her sweet fragrance.

Kiara swiftly returned to her mat. She unzipped her hoodie, feeling as if the area just went up 20 degrees. The woman rid herself of the black fabric, leaving her in a cropped white camisole. She used her hand to fan herself, hoping that the lack of clothing and the cool air would allow her face to return to its usual shade. Jimin glanced at the girl, subtly doing a double take as her chest barely moved up and down to accommodate her breathing. He stared ahead, cursing himself mentally, as he felt he was just about to lose the fight between his head and dick. He made it through having the woman sit in his lap and bent over directly in front of him, but her standing in a camisole was what would do him in?

Fuck, he thought to himself as the instructors started to talk. Hopefully, the shrill voice of the fake-peppy woman could stop him at a chub so he could avoid the embarrassment. The sweatpants he decided to put on weren't necessarily boner-proof. Her curves were so noticeable, so divine, blessed by Aphrodite herself. He totally understood why Taehyung was drawn to her, but how he put up with her slick tongue every day during their relationship was beyond him.

The class resumed its regular poses once again, giving Jimin a break as he focused on his posture. Kiara couldn't help but glance at him now and again. The regular poses had them remain close, causing their limbs to brush each other occasionally. The slight touch was more than enough to cause goosebumps to rise on either party's skin. Almost touching each other should've burned. It should've made them recoil strongly like the heat of a nearing fire. Stolen glances between the two should've created flames fueled by disdain for the other.

But it didn't. For the first time since that fateful night when everything went to shit, they were coexisting. Neither decided to question it; instead, they just lived in the moment, considering it would be the last.

The instructors demonstrated another pose, prompting the duo and the rest of the class to follow. This one didn't seem as sexually charged. Jimin sat on the mat with his legs wide open, allowing Kiara to place herself between them. She leaned back into him, resting her head on the upper portion of his chest. The curly-haired woman tried her hardest to relax against him, knowing that this particular stretch could end with her pulling a very uncomfortable area if Kiara wasn't careful. She let her eyes flutter shut as she tilted her chin toward the ceiling. Her hands rested comfortably on Jimin as if this was just an everyday thing with him—like being comfortable with him was normal.

Jimin was utterly focused. Having Kiara this close to him again could cause some trouble for him. He had already proved to himself that his mind could go to that place easily regarding the woman. The blonde wished he could blame it on the lack of pleasurable activities, but that would be a lie. As Kiara sunk into him, her curls tickling the side of his neck, he reached forward to grab her ankles. He lifted her legs into the air, slowly but surely pulling her limbs to either side of her. Jimin's brows furrowed as he continued to pull farther than he expected her to handle. She let out a soft hum, sounding pleasant to the ears.

Jimin inhaled deeply. He had the girl spread eagle in his lap, pulling her legs back until the side of her head. He averted his eyes, looking anywhere besides the place where any other guy would gaze. He even caught the male instructor staring in her direction for too a little long. The blonde instantly narrowed his eyes at the other, jaw set and tongue ready to slit his throat if the gaze proceeded. Luckily, the man was smart. He was instantly unsettled by his gaze, looking elsewhere while pretending to help another couple. Jimin couldn't help but roll his eyes, lip curling at the thought of him possibly checking out another woman while seemingly in a relationship. Though it was an assumption, Jimin could usually tell taken men from single. The former seemed to move more cautiously or didn't care for anything else around them. The latter always had a wandering eye, interacting with the world's opportunities of the beauties bestowed on him.

Kiara opened her eyes, meeting with the ceiling before looking ahead. The way Jimin had pulled her legs, stretching her abductors pleasantly, felt amazing. She looked at their reflection, gazing at his surprisingly strong arms. Her mind traveled to a darker place where they sat in a similar position, in front of a mirror in the privacy of her home, with a lot less clothing. Kiara was so caught up in her imagination—something she definitely shouldn't be indulging in considering the state of her relationship status—that she didn't notice Jimin's gaze slowly fall upon her, their eyes meeting in the mirror once again. She seemed in a daze to him; eyes glazed over with developing lust. He only wished to get a peek inside of that mind of hers.

When she finally came to, noticing how her eyes locked with his, she glared at him and quickly averted his gaze. Her face flushed with heat, a tedious habit when it came to this man. Kiara hoped he wouldn't see the embarrassment hiding in her rose-stained cheeks, but Jimin only chuckled at the sight, and she was unsure if that infuriated her or granted her relief. She wasn't allowed to ponder her feelings as the instructors commenced wind down, consisting of the duo separating and laying next to each other on their mats. They were only a few inches apart. Jimin's finger twitched, craving an action he knew he very well shouldn't. An hour of grasping her soft skin in his hands should've sufficed him. Yet he was greedy, wanting more of her than they both knew she could give.

Kiara stared up at the dimmed, round light fixtures that hung from the ceiling until little flashes of color invaded her line of vision. She let out a deep sigh, letting her eyes shut. Her mind was a tsunami of thoughts when it was supposed to be a calm lake. Three men crashed like tidal waves on her beach of sanity, when she hoped this class would get rid of them only for a second. She didn't want to think about her annoying boyfriend, her best friend whose eyes seemed to cover hidden feelings or the blonde whose looks should match his ugly personality to make things easier on her. She attempted to drown them with silence—push them so below the surface that it would take days for them to reach the top of the wave again. 

The room became brighter as the fluorescent lights turned on, and the instructors raised the shades to let in natural lightning. Kiara heard the other occupants get up and retrieve their stuff, but she remained glued to the floor beneath her. It wasn't enough time. This class achieved the opposite of why she attended. She still felt tense, and on edge, waiting for someone to push her over.

"Well, that wasn't a total nightmare," said a voice above her. The smug tone wrapped around his words dropped like acid onto the girl's face. Opening one eye, she was graced by the image of Jimin slightly bent over, hands in his pockets, with golden hair loosely spreading out and around him like rays of the sun.

"Says who?" Kiara scoffed as she sat up, a cloud blocking his rays. Most of the class had packed their stuff, leaving a few chatty stragglers beside the duo. She gathered her things before standing up and looking at the blonde. Looking up at him, she never noticed how much she needed to tilt her head back. Why did he look like he was glowing under the fluorescent lighting? His honey-glazed skin was smooth and supple, with the faintest freckles on his cheeks. 

"Considering the fact that we've survived an hour of pretending we could tolerate being close to each other, let alone touching each other, I'll take that as a win," Jimin smirked while folding his arms over his chest.

"Fucking perv," Kiara grumbled. "You liked putting your grimy little fingers on me, didn't you?"

"Don't act like you didn't enjoy it. I saw your face."

Kiara's eyes went wide for a moment before she unknowingly mirrored Jimin's stance by folding her arms over her chest as she shifted her weight to one foot. "I have not the slightest idea of what you're talking about."

The blonde couldn't help but smile as he watched her lips form into a subtle pout, her chin tilting upwards as she tried her hardest to appear snobby. Too bad she couldn't sell it. All she managed to do was look cute. "Yeah, OK, Kiara. Whatever will help you sleep better at night."

"Of course, you would think about how I sleep." Kiara quipped. She didn't know why she always dragged out conversations with Jimin. All she had to do was ignore him and walk away, but something about his little jabs made her want to fight.

Jimin let out a loud scoff. "Don't flatter yourself. You live far from my thoughts at night."

Kiara's brows furrowed, not understanding why that comment would leave her with an uncomfortable pit in her stomach instead of swelling with relief. "Yeah OK." She bent over to pack up her equipment, knowing Jimin's eyes were gazing upon her. She slowly stood up again, regaining control of the situation. She could see how Jimin's eyelids had lowered, plump lips ever so slightly agape as if he was trying to breathe out the lingering desire in his system. "So we're just gonna pretend like you weren't just staring at me, right?"

Jimin's face suddenly twitched, like he was snapping himself back to reality. Heat followed afterward, flushing his skin with a pretty pink. Kiara giggled softly, causing his lips to tug into a small smile despite the embarrassment swimming through him. How the woman managed to shut him up, not once, but twice now, was beyond him. Jimin was the king of clapbacks. There wasn't a soul that could escape his wicked tongue until he met the beautiful girl with wild hair and a smile that could light up even the darkest of nights. He could only sigh, feigning annoyance though he was rather impressed. 

"You really think I was staring at you?"

"I know it."

Jimin didn't bother testing his luck again. Something about her threw him off his game, which was not his proudest moment. The blonde couldn't do much but watched as she swayed her hips, strolling towards the door until she stopped suddenly.

"Guess you'll have something to think about at night now," Kiara said just as she walked out of the room. Jimin's jaw fell slightly before he collected himself, scoffing quietly. A part of him was tempted to follow after, to continue the banter they had fallen into.

But he knew better than that.

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[the-jewel-catalogue]

As today would have been the late Queen Elizabeth II’s 98th birthday, let’s take a look back at her 80th birthday celebrations in 2006.

The whole family were out in force for the multiple celebrations which included a private family dinner at Kew Palace where a few interesting jewels were worn.

Starting with the birthday girl herself, the Queen wore her King Khaled diamond necklace and four (FOUR!!) diamond rings, including her engagement ring.

Princess Anne also brought out an interesting pair of diamond and pearl earrings. We haven’t been able to find these anywhere else so far so we don’t have any information on the provenance of them.

Additionally, Sophie wore a few interesting pieces. On the straps of her dress, there’s an interesting decoration. It may be a pair of brooches but as we don’t think they’ve been seen since, we’re leaning towards them being part of the dress. As well, she’s wearing a trilogy ruby and diamond ring.

If you’d like to see more arrivals at the party and the fireworks the royals watched in the evening, here’s a video link from AP https://youtu.be/E8mwRY4OgD8?si=522rTxAWg17nzzr2

The royals also attended a thanksgiving service at St Paul’s Cathedral where Camilla wore a beautiful emerald and diamond brooch said to have belonged to the Queen Mother.

As Charles inherited a lot of his late grandmother’s jewellery, this is possibly a piece that was in that inheritance.

[kellyvela]

did u see that now on the jonas fan circles, and their similar interests, people are spreading/acting like the divorce is because sophie is a cheater? even some t**lor sw*f* fans are spreading it as well, saying she is their JA that she used JJ and cheated on him 🙄 as if JJ hadn't been mentioned of partying with early 20s girls and cheating on sophie for years before

Hello anon 👋

I don't care what the jb stans say, they are as stupid and willfully blind as targies.

Everyone is free to think what seems best to them, BUT the thing is, IF Sophie cheated jj with Perry as those people claim, then why Perry's ex girlfriend Olympia still follows Sophie on instagram, the woman that supposedly stole her man???

Perry and his ex break up was only made public mid September 2023, but the rumors about their separation started way before (November 2022), especially in July 2023, when Olympia celebrated her 27th birthday in Tuscany, Italy, and Perry was notoriously absent.

Friends began whispering about the state of their relationship when property developer Perry was conspicuous by his absence at the Chelsea-based model's 27th birthday party in July. They have not been seen in public together since last November. For three consecutive summers, the couple holidayed together, but this year they went their separate ways. The Princess visited Italy and Greece with family and friends (...) Perry, meanwhile, spent his summer with pals in Cow Neck, New York state, as well as in Spain with family. He was also at the Burning Man festival in Nevada with a posse of attractive young women.

Actually, the rumors of cheating came from Olympia's part, since she was seen with some married with children TT chef that was kicked out of his home by his wife when the rumors erupted.

King Charles's goddaughter, 27, beamed as she made her way to the celebrity chef's car, in Notting Hill, just days after her  ex-boyfriend Peregrine Pearson, spent time with Sophie Turner in Paris, where they were spotted kissing.

The wife of celebrity chef Thomas Straker has kicked him out of their marital home after being told he was in a romantic relationship with Princess Maria Olympia of Greece. Friends of Straker and his wife Davina who have two daughters aged four and two, said she was 'devastated' to be told of his infidelity in October.

I have seen those people claiming that Sophie and Perry were together since July 2023, since Sophie were in Tuscany, Italy, around July 2023 as well; but apparently they missed the fact that Sophie was there with jj (see the pictures), but Olympia was alone, without Perry, whose absence was conspicuous (see the pics and read article linked above).

So how were Sophie and Perry cheating, if Sophie was with jj in Italy, while Perry was with his family and friends in Spain and US???

Also, IF Sophie really cheated jj with Perry, then why Olympia's long time close friends like Ella Richards and Sascha von Bismarck, or George and Camilla Blandford, or even Rupert Gorst, to mention only some of them, are OK hanging out, travelling, partying and posting pictures of them all happy with Sophie, the woman that supposedly stole their friend's man?

Think about it.

Now, in addition to his well known awful reputation, over their 7 years together, there was a lot of rumors and blinds about jj being a serial cheater.

But not only that, while "sources" were claiming that jj has been caring for his daughters "alone" and "pretty much all of the time," there was a podcast about him living a single life in NY, clubbing till late hours:

Also, while there were headlines with jj saying that it was "too soon" for Sophie to date someone new, he was seen with more than one girl.

Look at this reddit post from November 6th 2023, about jj having a double date with a girl he met at some restaurant she works at:

Also, he was seen with this other girl in Seattle, around November 11th 2023:

And around December 2023, he was also seen with a redhead in Montreal:

And now jj is dating a model that got famous after starting a relationship with a 17 years old male model, while she was 28/29 years old, and they became parents soon after the male model turned 18 . . . . Sounds familiar??? 💀

A little update, it seems jj and new woman knew each other and were interacting a lot since before he started dating Sophie . . . .

 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[celticcrossanon]

Dear Celta, so now we know, from your last reading, what Camilla is about. She wants power for herself, not to undertake duty for the country but to serve herself and wishing her own bloodline could become the next king. I wonder why she fears William so much. Maybe knowing that William knows what she did to his mother?

Regarding the Pentacles things in your reading ~ I'm reminded again of comments I read in Quora, that Camilla is after the Greville jewelries. Who's to know if some of the items disappear into her pockets? These are personal bequeath, not Crown jewels. And upon his ascension, one of the first things Charles did was booting Angela Kelly out. She took care of all the jewels when our late Queen was alive, she knew where everything was, with her gone, who would know if this necklace or that ring or some such things were to disappear?

Remember that PR piece awhile ago about how Catherine doesn't enjoy jewelries but Camilla does? Well, I think this was Camilla trying pre-justify to the public why she wears all the awesome jewels and leave the tiny ones for Catherine to wear.

And later we saw Catherine wearing a tiny delicate tiara, which was such a little girl kind of tiara. But it was spun as Charles being gracious to Catherine for allowing her to wear a tiara which has not been worn in almost a 100 years.

Just my thoughts, of course. But that reading, it makes me feel sad for William. I hope catherine will get well soon so that he has her by his side undertaking royal duties again.

Hi AranPandora,

I think that Princess Catherine is giving her husband as much support as she can in her condition. I also think that everyone will be relieved when she is well and healed and able to come back to her duties, especially her husband, who I am sure misses her terribly when he is out and about on what should have been combined engagements (I know some of his engagements are single ones and they should be fine as they were always meant to be him by himself).

King Charles, Queen Camilla and jewellery seems to be quite a tangled topic. I remember the PR put out by Queen Camilla and I am still not sure why she did that - it was to have a go at Princess Catherine, yes, and to look better by comparison, I can see that, but I don't know why wearing jewellery is such a wonderful thing? I am obviously missing something here. I also remember King Charles saying that 'the vaults are open' at the same time, which I took as meaning that he was happy for jewels to be worn by those who wanted to do so.

I would hope that all the crown jewels are carefully listed and checked as part of their maintenance. I don't know about the Greville jewels - AFAIK they were left to The Queen Mother, who left them (all of them? some of them?) to her daughter Queen Elizabeth, and I don't know if Her Late Majesty left them to the crown, so they become part of the crown jewels, or if she passed them on to her son in turn.

The tiara who are talking about was the Strathmore Tiara, and it was a big deal to see it again (for me at least :) ). It was given to the Queen Mother by her parents on her wedding day, worn by her in her early years as a married woman, and then retired. It was passed on to the Late Queen Elizabeth when the Queen Mother died, and Her Late Majesty never wore it. We saw it again on Princess Catherine in 2023, exactly 100 years after it was given to the Queen Mother by her parents in 1923. The tiara itself is from the 19th century, so it is quite old, and history counts for more than carats with the aristocratic set, or so I am told.

For me, Princess Catherine wearing the tiara indicated that she was following in the footsteps of the Queen Mother, a much loved member of the BRF and a devoted wife. This is the woman who refused to leave London during The Blitz because she would not leave her husband, and who toured the damage wearing her best clothes and jewels because she said the people deserved to see them (i.e. they deserved to see her dressed up as a sign of respect for their suffering). By wearing the tiara, to me Princess Catherine was declaring a similar devotion to her country and her family.

[mermaidsirennikita]

What's your theory on what's going on with Kate or do you not care enough to have one?

I mean, I've had a pretty solid theory since the day they announced she had abdominal surgery and she wouldn't be back until after Easter.

(I notice that a lot of people who are new to this versus true to this think the Royals have said this and meant "she'll be back on Easter". OH NO MON AMI. If they had her LOCKED DOWN for Easter, we'd know at this point. They would've announced it.)

Is it possible that this is all a part of a divorce play by her (and William is trying to get her to stay) or William (and Kate is doing a Gone Girl type move where she's basically refusing to cooperate)? Yes. I am more open to that than I once was.

However, I say:

--This family is not as divorce-averse as people think, lmao. I see people go "but the Church of England" okay but like... the King.... is divorced... He divorced the most famous woman... maybe ever. And shit got better for him after they stopped twiddling their thumbs and did it. The royal family knows that it is ultimately better to just call it than to try and make someone stay. Anne is divorced, Creepy Uncle is divorced. It's not as taboo as I think some people feel, so if she's leaving... why concoct this story to keep her in the game?

And like, I do think William has SOMETHING WRONG WITH HIM... because no sane individual would attempt to handle this as he has been, and it is HIM, Kensington Palace is HIM, and Charles's office seems to be very hands-off about all this. But idk, being like "my wife had abdominal surgery" to hide her leaving you is a bit... much.

--Then we go to "he's divorcing her"/"has cheated one too many times" and she's in hiding. First off, adorable if people think Rose is the only one he's fucked with in this 20+ year relationship. I think there are probably MANY issues with that marriage aside from cheating, but Kate is not Diana. Kate was with William for a long time, during which I'm sure he cheated, before they married. She knew what she was signing up for. Is it harder than she thought? Probably. But I don't think she'd pull something like this over cheating, because the man ain't gonna stop so it's like... leave him or not.

But then on William's side... I don't know, dude. Yes, Charles really wanted to be with Camilla. I don't think it's as romantic a story as people think, but there got to be a point where if Charles was going to be with Camilla, he needed to marry her, and Diana didn't want to be queen anymore, so they just... divorced. I don't buy that William is attempting to force an unwilling Kate out of the picture to marry Rose. I think that if William wanted to be with Rose and Kate didn't want to leave, he'd simply have Rose as a mistress, as many royals before him have. And then, where's the logic of this man replacing Kate with Rose, but also trying to make everyone believe he's a good father and husband with this "William took the photo of Kate and the kids" bullshit?

So while I know some viewed the random article(s) about Rose as "soft-launching the mistress"... I did not. I saw it as warning shots from the media. They're not very happy with Wills; they know shit; here's a random article about a totally random lady they know nothing about besides her being a random marchioness who looks like Kate, who lives near William and Kate, who used to be friends with Kate but isn't anymore...........

--I also just think the idea of her being perfectly well in hiding is kind of ridiculous. Because I just feel like... unless she's in a basement somewhere, someone has to have seen her in all this time. If she's well??? And can walk about???? You're telling me she's either never left some house or has and someone hasn't seen her? Even Princess Charlene had to make up some bullshit about why she was in South Africa for weeks when she tried to escape that one time. (I wish more KateGate people would read about THAT story.)

If they're not divorcing, what is it?

If that woman could appear in a short little outing, not even speaking, maybe in a wheelchair, and look well enough... They would have her out there. It is INSANE TO ME that people think a family that regularly shopped Diana around at events, knowing she was self harming and binging and purging and throwing herself down the stairs while pregnant, that ignored how increasingly upset and mentally unwell Meghan was (while pregnant)... would just let Kate sit back when the world thinks William has like, chopped her up into little pieces and put her in a fridge.

I'm not even saying an engagement! I'm saying a quick "here's William pushing Kate around the garden", "here's Kate sitting and watching her kids play in the yard, VERY clear VIDEO FOOTAGE (because they've fucked it all up, nobody believes still images of her anymore, I don't buy that the woman in the pic in her mom's car was her 100%, and I think the most recent pic without her face in it is probably an old one being shopped as new) is needed. And they're not making it happen.

And I don't think it's because they won't. I think it's because they CANNOT. Like, if she was okay, I do tend to feel like Charles might actually make her show the fuck up, but I don't think she is and it's on William to handle it. (And William fucking up kind of benefits Charles, because they are always in competition. "Charles has cancer that's why he's not doing it" Charles is not only... Charles. He is Camilla and their entire office.)

So. I think she is either incredibly unwell mentally, or incredibly unwell physically--beyond what they've implied. I think there's probably some truth to what the Spanish press has reported about her health. I feel like something probably happened around December 28, and she is having a hard time.

And why not just SAY THAT?

Because a) this is a very old-fashioned ableist family that treats issues that have to do with mental and physical health with shame, and I mean, they have literally locked members of the family they find unwell away before, and if you look at what they did to Diana beyond what The Crown even showed... this is not very off b) William is a disaster who thinks he knows everything and both uses the press and truly hates it, OR SO I GUESS NOT KNOWING HIM AT ALL and his PR strategy has never been good so once confronted with a genuine crisis he's flailing c) of WHAT CAUSED this incident.

Did increasingly horrible conditions in that family and in her marriage cause Kate to do something? (I don't know why people would think this is crazy when her mother-in-law literally discussed passive suicide attempts and constant suicidal thinking, though I suppose the Windsors have recently made a lot of headway with their "Diana did it all because she was crazy" versus "Diana did it because we drove her crazy" press tour.) Did someone hurt her? Did she have unhealthy habits exacerbated by the royal life that led to medical complications? I don't know.

And I also think it's possible that they're hoping they can get her back to "peak condition" if they have enough time, and it's possible that simply won't happen. No matter what does happen, though, I can tell you that there is no way they can get their way out of this looking the way they did before.

Anyway, I've been on this train since literally day 1 and everything they're doing just makes me feel increasingly correct, so. The press is starting to turn. The New York Post (a Murdoch rag, which therefore SHOULD support them) started doing write ups about how her health may be much worse than they've let on. It's not good.

Disclaimer: theories theories theories speculation speculation alleged alleged

[tiaramania]

Could you please do some tiara predictions/wishes for the upcoming British State Visit? Thank you!!!

I don't think we'll see any big surprises but I would love to be wrong.

Queen Camilla - I'd like to see her wear the Girls of Great Britain & Ireland again. I was very pleasantly surprised to see her wear it for her last tiara appearance but it was tilted a little too far back for my taste. She normally has excellent tiara placement so I think it's just a matter of this being a new tiara for her.

Princess of Wales - Queen Mary's Lovers Knot Tiara is a beautiful tiara but I'm kind of tired of it and really of Catherine wearing pearls in general. I think I'd like to see her bring back the Halo Scroll Tiara with a good updo and colorful accompanying jewelry. I just don't feel like we were able to properly appreciate it with the veil and everything going on.

Princess Royal - I really want her to wear the Double Meander Tiara again but a more likely choice would be Princess Alice's Meander Tiara.

Duchess of Edinburgh - I want her to wear her Anthemion Tiara again because I want to see better pictures of the updated arrangement. We got great pictures at the first incoming state banquet of King Charles's reign but Sophie wore her Aquamarine Necklace Tiara so I hope the good pictures continue.

Duchess of Gloucester - For some reason I was thinking of the Iveagh Tiara as I was trying to go to sleep last night so I'll go with that. It's such a beautiful and easy to wear tiara. I'm really sad that it was inherited out of the mainline of the family and can only hope that somehow it makes it back.

[everythingroyalty]

As per usual the BRF put on a shambolic display of precedence at Constantine's Service of Thanksgiving 🤡

First let me start out by requesting an answer as to how the FUCK Sarah Ferguson and her nonceband take precedence over A REIGNING KING AND QUEEN?

As much as I enjoy seeing my girl Lady Sarah Chatto take precedence over the play pretend royals that are Pavlos and MC's children, can you even imagine how slighted the BRF – let alone their stans – would've been if the tables were turned and Princess Alexandra of Greece and Nicolas Mirzayantz took precedence over Charles and Camilla?

On to the seating:

How exactly do you have Andrew (a non(ce)-working royal 🤡) take precedence over the Duke of Kent (a working royal)? 🫠 Honest to god, looking at the BRF front row, it looks like he ACTIVELY snatched Edward's seat because it makes zero sense for him to be seated behind the Gloucesters but ahead of the Kents 🙃

This is also just to say: Make no mistake, the next time Harry attends a BRF function and is seated five rows down "because hEs nOt a wORkiNG rOyAL DUH", remember how these weirdos are clearly more willing to let a sexual predator back in the fold than a man addressing the racism his wife endures 🫶

And then we return to Sarah, live-in (non-royal) divorcee – the only one of her kind that apaz assumes the precedence of her (royal) child at an official function – let alone takes precedence over her 🤡 Are we supposed to take this as a sign she and the Duke of Nonce have remarried? Because I dare you to name another royal family where she wouldn't be placed bang last.

On the... family(?) side, we have Alexia, Theodora and Olympia taking precedence over their younger brothers (except for Pavlos taking precedence over Alexia - we can't let the plebs know what they've missed out on by honouring actual birth order) which is... fair... though not exactly reflected in the primogeniture the GRF observes but whatevz 🤪 But then... the spouses of Constantine's children (all aside from ✨ Marie thee Chantal ✨ obvs) take precedence over Odysseus and Aristides? What does that even mean? 😭

Princess Alexandra of Greece (second cousin) and Alexander of Yugoslavia (first cousin once removed) take precedence over Elena, Cristina, Gustav and Alexandra (nieces and nephew) – but somehow not over Felipe and Letizia (thereby honouring Felipe's position as reigning monarch – a position that would since be shat on by Lord 4th on I'm a Celeb 2022) who take precedence over JC and Benedikte (brother- and sister-in-law). Queen Noor (unrelated 🤪) takes precedence over both Gustav and Alexandra (nephew and niece)... but NOT over Elena and Cristina (nieces).

And don't even get me started on the precedence somehow afforded to Chantal Miller... 🤡

[princessandknightfight]

'tis finally here... the bracket...

(matchups below the cut)

Jade & Hendrick (Dragon Quest XI) vs Westley & Buttercup (The Princess Bride)

Gwen & Frederick (Cursed Princess Club) vs Palamedes Sextus & Camilla Hect (The Locked Tomb)

Hori Masayuki & Kashima Yū (Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun) vs Kohga & Sooga (Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity)

Zen & Mitsuhide (Snow White with the Red Hair) vs Marinette & Adrien (Miraculous Ladybug)

Glimmer & She-Ra/Adora (She-ra and the Princesses of Power) vs Utena and Anthy (Revolutionary Girl Utena)

Shrek & Fiona (Shrek) vs Gideon & Harrowhark (The Locked Tomb)

Mytho and Fakir (Princess Tutu) vs Kit Tanthalos and Jade Claymore (Willow)

Yuyuko & Youmu (Touhou) vs Duck & Fakir (Princess Tutu)

Lucy Heartfilia & Erza Scarlet (Fairy Tail) vs Sapphire (Princess Knight)

Korra & Asami (The Legend of Korra) vs Nathaniel Thorn & Silas (Sorcery of Thorns)

Link & Zelda (The Legend of Zelda) vs Cassandra & Rapunzel (Rapunzel)

Cordelia Glenbrook & Avlora (Triangle Strategy) vs Luke & Leia (Star Wars)

Han Solo & Chewbacca (Star Wars) vs Ranni & Blaidd (Eldin Ring)

Princess Cookie & Knight Cookie (Cookie Run) vs Eugene & Rapunzel (Rapunzel)

Hamlet & Horatio (Hamlet) vs Endymion and Princess Serenity (Sailor Moon)

Rysn Ftori & Cord (The Stormlight Archive) vs Glory & Deathbringer (Wings of Fire)

Dehya & Dunyarzad (Genshin Impact) vs Sadie & Amira (Princess Princess Ever After)

Minerva & Palla (Fire Emblem) vs Bubblegum & Marceline (Adventure Time)

Sapphire & Ruby (Steven Universe) vs Poppy & Cyrenic (Sleepless)

Sapphia & Odette (High Class Homos) vs Mario & Peach (Mario)

Florence Vassy & Svetlana Sergievsky (Chess) vs Ryne & Thancred (Final Fantasy XIV)

King Dedede & Meta Knight (Kirby) vs Kyros & Rebecca (One Piece)

Prince Adam & Teela (He-Man) vs Sir Miranda Aldes (Tumblr)

Vin & Elend Venture (Mistborn) vs Arturia Pendragon & Bedivere (Fate)

Ventuswill & Frey (Rune Factory 4) vs Alphonse Elric & Mei Chang (Fullmetal Alchemist)

Orym of the Air Ashari & Dorian Storm (Critical Role) vs Kokomi & Gorou (Genshin Impact)

Suletta Mercury & Miorine Rembran (Mobile Suit Gundam: The Witch from Mercury) vs The moon and the earth (real life)

Saori Kido and Pegasus Seiya (Saint Seiya) vs MK & Mei (LEGO Monkie Kid)

Haruno Haruka/Cure Flora & Kaido Minami/Cure Mermaid (Go! Princess Pretty Cure) vs Apple White & Darling Charming (Ever After High)

Rose Quartz & Pearl (Steven Universe) vs Yona & Hak (Yona of the Dawn)

Ariyet & Hew (Through the Door) vs Elincia & Lucia (Fire Emblem)

Impa & Zelda (The Legend of Zelda) vs Violetta Mondarev & Tarvek Sturmvoraus (Girl Genius)

[princesscatherinemiddleton]

2024 ROYAL PREDICTIONS

I am greatly lowering my expectations for this year...

- King Charles and Queen Camilla undertake a tour of Australia, New Zealand, Tonga and Samoa, alongside attending the 2024 CHOGM

- The Prince and Princess of Wales go on one joint tour

- The Prince and Princess of Wales go on one solo working visit each

- The 2024 Earthshot Prize ceremony is hosted in Africa

- Peter Phillips gets engaged and married

- One of the York girls announces another pregnancy

- There is an Edinburgh PR push

- A monarch dies

- A Norwegian royal death (sorry!)

- Princess Martha Louise's wedding is the highlight of the year

- Princess Ingrid Alexandra takes on her first patronages

- Baby Luxembourg is a girl

- Prince Sebastien of Luxembourg announces an engagement

- Princess Elisabeth of Belgium takes on her first patronages

- Mary and Frederik do something to celebrate their 20th wedding anniversary

- There is a Greek/Danish party for Princess Benedikte's 80th birthday

- Princess Madeleine and her family return to Sweden

- Princess Sofia of Sweden announces a pregnancy

- Crown Princess Amalia and Princess Alexia have a joint engagement

- A Jordanian Princess has a baby

- We see lots of royals at the Summer Olympics

[shadowjackery]

This post was brought to you by Parts of the Body and the letter H.

Continuing the train of thought from: https://www.tumblr.com/shadowjackery/709801424218963968/pick-a-live-action-movie-keep-one-human-actor?source=share

Design sketches and casting notes after the cut.

The token human is Hamlet. This seems obvious to me.

Bert and Ernie are Guildenstern and Rosencrantz. Their doppelgänger are what-not muppets, who turned out looking a lot like Andy Candy and Eddie Spaghetti from "Captain Vegetable" on Sesame Street.

Gonzo is The Player. Again, this feels perfect to me. The death-challenging artiste! Gonzo turned out to be surprisingly tricky to figure out how to draw well.

Piggy would demand to be Queen Gertrude, so Kermit has to be King Claudius. Mirroring her, Link Hogthrob in drag is the Player Queen. And for the Player King, Camilla, also in drag, to stay in theme.

I never got around to casting the Ghost of Hamlet's Father. Maybe Rolf? You could talk me into Uncle Deadly, or a bedsheet ghost, or that Jim Henson muppet they used in the ol' jugband numbers, or the hideous CG recreation of Jim himself with a machine AI voice.

In Stoppard's text, the youngest player, "Alfred", plays a Queen. I changed that here: Elmo plays Alfred who plays a Princess, mirror to Ophelia, and for her I just made up a girl monster because the girl monsters on Sesame Street seem too young to be fooling around with college boys. Though, yes, now that you mention it, Elmo is also far too young to be pimped out by Gonzo, but that part of the play is supposed to be transgressive, and anyway have you ever seen Elmo interviewed on a late night show? He and Gonzo would love the joke. They would conspire to make it somehow worse.

Last minute thought that I never drew: Ophelia could also be played by a fish, because she drowns.

Laertes: "...How?!" Claudius: "Well, it's too complicated to go into here. This play is long enough." Laertes: "I understand entirely. Shall we continue?" Claudius: "Please."

Sam the American Eagle is perfect for Polonius, and I invented a different bird for his player equivalent.

Grover plays Laertes cranked up to 11, and I think that's Harry Monster or someone similar as his player equivalent.

Scooter could be Horatio. I did think of Rizzo the Rat at one point, but he would not put up with Hamlet's shit for very long, while Scooter would shrug and roll with it, which is more true to the text.

I never quite figured out castings for Osric and Fortinbras, who don't appear in these drawings, because I honestly like Sweetums for either part and couldn't decide. I think I tend toward making him Osric ("A palpable hit!"), because the Swedish Chef playing the Norwegian Prince could be hilarious:

Fortinbras: "...Wat du hey?!"

Horatio: "What is it ye would see? If aught of woe or wonder, cease your search."

Fortinbras: "De chicky cri un hackensvacken! O Morp, Wat festen toward yer unendinlindinlindin cell Ther thoo soo muchen kingen in un kaboom So bludili hast stroock?"

(My apologies to Danes, Swedes, and Norwegians...)

And, naturally, the Gravediggers who gleefully desecrate the grave of a certain much-despis'd court jester couldn't be anybody else but Statler and Waldorf.

[what-if-queen-camilla]

Brighter Days

... a glimpse into the future with a little spin-off as someone wished for last night ❤️

I hope you'll like this piece and it doesn't spoil too much - don't worry, the main story will soon continue as well!

6th May 2023, morning

Buckingham Palace

"Wonderful, Mummy, you look absolutely beautiful!", 35-year-old Theodora sighed and wiped a few tears away as she stood in front of her mother - the Queen of the United Kingdom, who was going to be crowned, alongside her father, King Charles III, at Westminster Abbey in less than 3 hours. Although they'd had about 8 months to prepare themselves, sometimes it still felt surreal to her, not to speak of her poor mother who'd been nothing but a nerve-wreck for at least 72 hours. And now she stood there, dressed in the most beautiful, cream white gown with all of it's amazing, personal, little details, the stunning golden embroidery, for jewellery only wearing a delicate little golden cross bracelet and fine golden earrings and, most impressively, Queen Victoria's coronation necklace, which simply looked exquisite on her. She really looked like an angel, so elegant and graceful and pure…

"Thea is right, Mummy, you look marvellous and everything's going to be fine!", Laura agreed and also wiped a few tears away. Camilla turned around and looked at them all full of gratitude, love and uncertainty. They had all lined up in front of her, almost like military regiment: Annabel and Fiona, (who'd be her most senior Mistresses of the robes during the ceremony, followed by Princess Charlotte and her own little, six-year-old daughter Isabella, followed by Lola and Eliza, Camilla's two older granddaughters who had both turned 15 last October and January respectively), Laura, Lola and Eliza, and herself, who had all been with her all morning, helped her get dressed and at least tried to help her relax. "Milla, we're all so very proud of you!", Annabel declared solemnly and with a tearful voice, emotionally looking at her sister, full of love and admiration, quietly adding: "If only Mum and Dad could see you like this..." "Yes, if only…", Camilla said, but thankfully, before the two of them could have got any more melancholic, the door was opened and the other ladies came in: Catherine with Charlotte and Isabella, all three of them looking stunning, Catherine regally dressed in the same robe of the Royal Victorian Order as Theodora, and the girls twinning in the cutest little white cape dress ever, looking so happy and so proud to be part of all of this, it was just heartwarming. Camilla's face lit up the moment she had seen her youngest granddaughters and both Isabella and Charlotte rushed over to her to give her a hug, but Annabel and Fiona were rather concerned about the dress, consciously preventing them from being too wild - not only the girls but also an overjoyed grandmother. "These two here…", Catherine said, smilingly pointing at the girls. "Wanted to give you a little something." "Oh?", Camilla asked, looking at them in excitement, and Charlotte sweetly helped Isabella pull out the little box which they had jointly designed and painted in Camilla’s favourite colour, duck egg blue. Isabella shyly handed it over to her grandmother, who looked at it very interested and admiringly. "Such a pretty little box, look at the beautiful paintings!", she gushed, carefully drawing over the delicately painted flowers and hearts with her finger. "Have you two made it?", she asked and Charlotte and Isabella nodded. "You're so talented, it's absolutely beautiful, thank you, my little darlings!", she said, visibly moved, and bent down to give them sort of a half-hug, much to Annabel and Fiona's concern but, thank goodness, nothing happened to the dress.

"Gaga, you have to open it…", Lola said, shaking her head and rolling her eyes in amusement. "Oh…", Camilla chuckled, facepalming herself, before finally opening the pretty little box. "Ohhh!", she exclaimed, as she discovered a beautiful, golden bracelet with eight heart-shaped, golden charms on it. Carefully, she placed it in her hand to have a closer look and realised that every charm featured one of her ladies' names, engraved in their own handwriting: Annabel, Laura, Theodora, Lola, Eliza, Catherine, Charlotte and Isabella. Camilla looked up at them and, once more, had to wipe a few tears away. "This is so very beautiful, I… I don't know what to say.", she stuttered, touched and overwhelmed. "We're happy you like it!", Eliza said, tenderly stroking her grandmother's arm. "I… I'm sorry I'm being so emotional today, it's just…" "... the nerves, we know, and understand that.", Catherine assured her with a comforting smile. "Are you going to wear it today?", Charlotte asked, expectantly looking at Camilla, who shook her head in disappointment. "I'm afraid not, sweetie. But I'll wear it for the concert tomorrow and probably never take it off again! It's so beautiful and I'll always have all of you with me, wherever I go. I shall treasure it forever.", she said solemnly, carefully putting the bracelet back into the box, placing it on the sideboard next to her other personal belongings which would be taken back to Clarence House by their staff once they'd have left for the service."Gaga, we have to take a selfie of all of us before we leave!", Lola suggested almost in panic, as if this was the most important part of the day - perhaps it was, at least to her. "Alright, alright, let's take a selfie.", Camilla laughed, motioning for the other ladies to gather together around her so that Lola, who stood in front of her, had them all on camera. "Cheese!", she said and everyone smiled their most beautiful smile - just in time, as one second later the doors swung open and the other non-royal family members came in to pick up Laura as she was not going to leave together with the others. She kissed Camilla goodbye, one last time "uncrowned", waved at the others and disappeared.

"I think we might go and search for husbands soon as well.", Catherine said and Theodora nodded. "Yes, we'd better." They'd be driven to the Abbey by car but would take part in the procession at the beginning of the service, so they'd all had to be absolutely on time. "Alright, Mummy… we take our leave as well.", she announced, taking both her mother's hands, looking at her full of love. "You will be amazing. I love you so much and I'm so proud of you. We all are.", she said, pressing Camilla’s hands tightly, affectionately kissing both her cheeks, before she bent down to her little daughter, pulling her into her arm. "And you, my little darling, will be amazing, too.", she told her. "You take care of Gaga and protect her, will you?", she asked with a twinkle in her eye, and Isabella nodded seriously. "I will, Mummy.", she promised. "And Lola and Eliza take care of you. You will listen and do what they say, won't you?" "Yes, Mummy." "Good girl!", Thea praised her and kissed her cheeks as well. It hadn't initially been planned for her and Charlotte to be involved in the ceremony the way they were now, it had just happened during the rehearsals, they had been obsessed with Camilla’s robes and desperately wanted to do what Annabel and Fiona were doing so at some point, they had given in and let them try and everyone's surprise, they had taken it all very seriously and done amazingly. Eventually, the girls had been asking and begging and crying so long that their parents and grandparents, especially Camilla, whose robes were concerned in the first place, had allowed them to do the job on the big day, with the one condition that the two older girls, Lola and Eliza, would be behind them and assist, should the need arise, and after a bit of loving persuasion, they, too, had agreed to do this for their grandmother and Camilla had been overjoyed.

Catherine and Theodora rushed down the grand staircase which, much to their amusement, was quite a noisy affair in the heavy robes. It was the first time for both of them to wear the full "regalia" of the Royal Victorian Order which they had both been bestowed with by Her late Majesty in 2017 and 2019 respectively, each of them wearing it with pride. Down in the Entrance Hall, their husbands were already waiting for them with their two little sons; William, looking all dashing in his Order of the Garter robes, with Louis and Thea's husband Alexander, dressed in an elegant Morning Suite, with their four-year-old son Albert. "You two look lovely!", William said charmingly to his wife and sister, greeting both of them with a kiss. "So do you!", Thea said, asking: "Have you been with dad? How is he doing?" "Um… alright.", William replied, but Louis revealed: "Grandpa is nervous!!!", which caused both little boys to chuckle. The four adult shared a smile as well, before each couple with their respective son, entered their car…