#call me papa cheddar

[angellayercake]

Banchetto: Formaggi e Frutta

Papa Emeritus III x Reader | NSFW

AO3 | Insalata | Masterpost

Selecting the pairings for cheese can be deceptively complicated. Anyone can put some cheese on a tray and call it done but for it to be truly good some serious thought needs to be done. Texture, flavour, sweet vs savoury, creamy vs crunchy, all build up to a well rounded dish. The first bite of a juicy grape paired with tang of a strong cheddar, or the sweet bitterness of cranberry with the mellow creaminess of a brie. Every element has to work together to create a bigger experience. If you make these choices with care then you will have a show stopping course and all you had to do was some slicing.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

You had been lingering in his office. He was perched on the edge of his desk with his arms locked around you, preventing you from leaving and ending your time together for the day. The two of you had been in this position for at least half an hour, every time you tried to extricate yourself he would pull you in for one last kiss which became two, then three, then he would remember another important matter you just had to discuss right now. So far you had covered Cabaret the musical, why linen was the superior summer material, his favourite type of pen to do signings and the lies he used to tell people about ghoul mating habits. And now you were discussing your favourite cheeses.

‘I honestly have to say I don’t think I have tried a cheese I didn't like,’ you admit after listening to him explain why Italian cheeses were by far the best in the world. He wrinkles his nose at you, shaking his head in disgust. As inconsequential as these topics were, you enjoyed hearing his typically outlandish opinions and his passionate defence of them. You may have even been guilty of disagreeing with him deliberately from time to time just to enjoy his attempts to convince you of his point of view. 

‘Even the stinky ones?’ He looks like even just thinking of them is a displeasure he can’t abide, the charmingly emphasised wrinkles above the bridge of his nose almost distracting you from his argument. ‘The French, thinking they can get away with crimes against dairy just because of a few good ones,’ he grumbles, pulling a laugh from you. 

‘I think the English are guilty of that too, I am afraid,’ you remind him. ‘Have you ever tried Stinking Bishop?’

‘Ugh!! Never and I never will,’ he shakes his head again refusing to even entertain the thought. ‘But, cara mia, that is why everything Italian is far superior,’ he says, lifting his eyebrows suggestively and you suspect he isn’t just talking about cheese any more.

‘With what I have learned in the last few months I can’t say I disagree,’ you reply against his lips as he is already reeling you in for another kiss. You don’t let him distract you for too much longer though this time. ‘I don’t think you should judge a cheese until you try it with accompaniments though. The right flavours paired with the right cheese can make all the difference.’ 

‘I suppose there is some truth to what you say, mia cuocoina,’ he trails off for a moment looking like he is waging a battle internally before he takes a deep breath and continues. ‘Speaking of cheese, did you know there is a farmers market in town this weekend? I have heard they have very many types of cheese on sale there.’

‘I had heard, yes. It happens every month.’ You think back fondly to those trips out of the Abbey with Mona. ‘We used to take it in turns to go and pick up some obscure ingredients as a challenge for the others. I haven’t had a chance to go for a while.’

‘Would you like to go to this one? With me?’ His hesitancy makes your heart melt. How this man could ever think you wouldn’t want to go with him you have no idea? As if you don’t willingly spend almost every moment of your free time with him.

‘Are you asking me on a date, Terzo?’ You tease, hoping to ease his worry a little. The two of you may have done everything backwards but you can’t help the little thrill you get from the idea of him taking you on a proper date. He had been watching you nervously as he waited for your response but at your gentle teasing the corner of his lips pulled up in a smile even as a light blush crawled across his cheeks. 

‘Si, I am,’ he says simply, lifting his head and looking you directly in the eyes, hypnotising you for a moment in his gaze.

‘I would love to go with you,’ you reply as soon as you snap out of it, not wanting to leave him hanging any longer. His wide smile always takes your breath away and you stand there for far too long, just grinning at each other before you realise you do really need to leave. You give him one last kiss before making your way back to your room, mind full of your upcoming date. 

The morning arrives and you are up early having explained to Terzo that the earlier you get there the better. It would be less busy, you got the best pick of the produce and all the tasters won’t have sat out for so long. Taking your advice he had agreed to leave the Abbey around nine, and also on your advice you both were skipping breakfast, not wanting to fill yourselves up before you get there. But his morning coffee is non-negotiable… 

After getting ready you let yourself into his rooms and start the coffee machine. You can hear him moving about already so you don’t worry about getting him up, but instead have time to fuss about… well, everything. You smooth your hands over your outfit as you wait letting your nerves get the better of you for a second. It’s not to say you didn’t usually make an effort with your appearance, you did, but your clothes and hair had to be practical when cooking even if just for him. This was the first time you had had the opportunity to dress up and for some reason it had your stomach in knots. 

You wore your hair down today, letting the dark waves cascade down your back where they were usually secured in a bun and your make up was light as you had considered the time of day - just a subtle base and some eyeliner, mascara and lipstick to add a little emphasis to your features. The dress you picked was one you had never worn before. It was black, as was the majority of your wardrobe, but the light cotton fell softly over your figure, the hem ending at your mid-calf. It was buttoned up from your chest to your knees, giving a glimpse of leg and decolletage you hoped would capture his attention without flaunting too much. The puff sleeves and broderie anglaise finish the look and make it, in your opinion, the perfect dress for a date at the farmers market.

Just as you finish the coffee you hear him come to the door. You turn around a cup in each hand to catch him frozen in the doorway. With one hand he is clinging to the door frame and then other is laid dramatically over his heart. He is looking at you as if he has never seen you before. He looks incredible himself, his hair slicked back as you had not seen it for a long time and his face surprisingly clear of his paints, given you were leaving the Abbey. He is wearing an off-white revere collar shirt, habitually unbuttoned half way down his chest over tailored linen trousers in a soft dove grey with black woven loafers. He has a matching linen blazer over his arm, and he looks like he has just stepped out of the pages of a Milanese fashion magazine.

‘Good morning, Terzo,’ you greet as you go to hand him his coffee but he ignores it in favour of pulling you in for a kiss, letting go of the door frame and instead wrapping his arm around your waist and letting his hand glide down your body over the smooth fabric. You hum into his mouth enjoying his attentions but slightly worried about spilling coffee on you both as you hold them over his shoulders. ‘I could get used to this sort of greeting,’ you say when he lets you pull away, still seemingly at a loss for words. 

‘Grazie,’ he whispers, finally taking his coffee and savouring the first sip before continuing, letting his eyes roam all over you. ‘You are, well… beautiful doesn’t even cover it, I think. Sei una visione di bellezza, come non ne ho mai viste.’ He does this every now and then, slipping into his native tongue when he can’t seem to find the words to express himself in English. You don’t understand what he is saying but the sentiment is clear, so you let the melodic words wash over you and let your smile widen in response. 

‘You are looking very handsome today too.’ You cup his cheek with your now free hand and let him nuzzle into your palm. ‘I have been looking forward to this all week.’ 

‘Me too, cara mia.’ He places his hand over yours before taking it in his. ‘Are you ready to go?’

‘I’ve got my coffee, I've got you, I don't think I need anything else. And if we leave now everyone will still be at breakfast so we shouldn’t be bothered.’ With a nod and a smile he leads you from the kitchen through his rooms and out to the corridor, pausing only to lock the door behind you. You realise then that this is probably going to be the first time he has left the Abbey since returning from the last tour and what a big step this must be for him, as well as the two of you. You walk through the corridors quickly, leaving a plausible distance between you in case you were seen by anyone but before you reach the main entrance he leads you down an old corridor that, as far as you knew, only led to an older unused wing of the Abbey. 

‘Where are we going?’ You ask him as you follow him along the twists and turns of the dusty corridor but he just shushes you and continues as though he is looking for something. To your surprise he ignores the few doors you pass coming to a stop at an old painting covered in dust, which depicts what you can only assume is a life-sized satanic knight posing in his armour in the landscape of hell. Without any further explanation he feels around the edge of the frame until you hear a click and the painting swings forward revealing a secret set of stairs leading down to a door where you can see slivers of daylight seeping in where it has warped in its frame. Taking your hand he helps you down the steps before having to give the door a shove once, then twice before it opens and you find yourselves at the side of the main Abbey just outside the tall garden wall.  

‘This is the way we used to go when we didn’t want anyone to see us leaving,’ he says, shooting you a mischievous grin. ‘When we were boys especially and the older sisters wouldn’t give us the time of day we would sneak into town…’ He trails off realising the story he was about to tell you and his expression turns a little sheepish. ‘Well, you know how teenage boys can be.’ You shake your head at him good naturedly but take his offered hand so he can lead you down what is clearly a well trodden path through the public gardens to a side gate that opens on the main road into town.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

The first and arguably most important consideration when preparing a dish like this is making everything bitesize. Slice things too small and the flavours will not balance well, slice things too big and you will end up with all sorts of mess, but getting it just right? A slice of cheese, a piece of fruit, a spoonful of chutney, a sliver of meat could all fit on a cracker and be eaten in one perfect bite.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

It is a short pleasant walk especially on a morning like this. The Abbey is about half a mile from the town and despite the occasional comment or funny look, the residents seem to have accepted sharing the area with a satanic church a long time ago. The residents of the Abbey brought a lot of business to the local shops and trades people, doing their best to contribute to the community they were fringe members of which served to strengthen the tolerance of their presence. You yourself had good relationships with the local food stores, avoiding spending your budget at the supermarket as much as you could, so you had never experienced anything but a sideways glance from some of the more conservative members of the community. 

After about fifteen minutes you reach the town square which is already bustling with life even at this early hour of the weekend. Rows and rows of stalls fill the usually open space and there are already plenty of shoppers drifting from stall to stall. Having finished your coffees, you take his and put them in the nearest bin before pausing so you can come up with a plan of action.

‘When I come with Mona we try to be strategic,’ you explain as you try and suss out what the closest stalls are selling.

‘Oh, and why is this? To get the best produce? The best deals?’ He asks inquisitively, tilting his head as he thinks. You wish you could say those were the reasons but it was much less professional.

‘Nope. It is so we don’t get too full before we have eaten everything we want.’ He laughs loudly, clearly surprised at your reasoning but you try your best to keep your face straight. ‘It is important you know!’ you insist as his laughter calms.

‘You have been training me up for this moment, no?’ he says, patting his belly and winking at you knowingly.

‘Bigger appetites than yours have been defeated by the farmer’s market tasters, I will have you know,’ you respond, doing your best not to get distracted by his insinuation.

‘Psh, I could eat one of everything and still have room for whatever delicious dish you have planned for tonight.’ He winds his arm around your waist pulling you against his side as you walk together to the first stall. You can’t keep up your serious façade, his confidence and manhandling bringing a flush to your cheeks, at least until you realise what he said.

‘Need I remind you it is Saturday and my day off.’ You prod him in the side in retaliation and he jumps slightly when you catch his ticklish spot. He grabs your finger before you can poke him again, a little tug of war ensuing before he lets you free with a stern look.

‘Well I can cook for you then,’ he says, snapping his fingers as the idea comes to him. You dip your head for a moment, your chest feeling full at his insistence you spend even more of today together. Until the reality of him cooking anything for you sinks in. You had long suspected that he lacked even the most basic cooking skills, which was confirmed the only time you ever let him try to help you.

‘And what exactly are you going to cook for me?’ You ask as you reach the first stall filled with assorted jars of conserves and jams.

‘I will cook…’ He pauses, looking around at the closet stalls. ‘Cheese!’ he exclaims loudly, drawing some looks and a chuckle from the cheesemonger a couple of stalls over. He clears his throat, quieting his voice. ‘Cheese, cara mia, like we talked about the other night. Cheese and crackers and fruit and chutney. Like this!’ He picks up a jar of spiced cranberry chutney from the stall.

‘That will be 55 krona please, sir,’ the lady behind the stall tells him. He hands the jar to you and fishes his wallet out of his pocket, handing her cash and insisting she keep the change. 

‘That’s not exactly cooking is it,’ you scoff, putting the jar in one of the many tote bags you had thought to bring along. ‘But that being said, I would be happy to join you this evening.’ 

‘Maybe not but I can assure you I will put a lot more effort into dessert,’ he replies with a smirk as he pulls you towards the cheesemonger. ‘Now, Signior, I need a selection of your best cheese for mia cuocoina, and a little advice.’ 

He leads the way around the market, insisting on tasting this and that and asking questions of the vendors about flavour pairings and serving suggestions until your tote bags are beginning to weigh you both down. You find a bench at the edge of the square and flop down onto it taking the weight off your aching shoulders. He follows after you, sliding the bags to one side so he can sit right beside you. 

‘Try this, cara mia,’ he holds a small pastry to your lips, one he has already tried if the tell tale crumbs around his lips were anything to go buy. You almost refuse, your tactical plan having flown out the window long ago at his insistence you taste test almost everything. He looks at you beseechingly though and you cave, opening your mouth and allowing him to feed it to you. Before he can pull away though you close your lips around his fingers, getting your own back the only way you can right now. He freezes, his pupils blown wide as he watches you suck the tips of his fingers. 

‘Fancy seeing you here.’ A voice you recognise breaks through your lustful haze. You almost choke between the pastry and Terzo whipping his fingers from your mouth as if they were burning. You swallow your mouthful without even registering if it was nice or not as you turn to see Lilly and Rich stood before you. You jump up quickly, offering them each a hug, then trying to stand between them and Terzo, wracking your brain to explain why you were out in public with Papa's fingers in your mouth. 

‘Hi guys, what a lovely surprise. You should really try the pastries from over there, they are very good…’ You can feel your face burning completely at a loss on how to explain away what they must have seen.

‘Will Papa hand feed them to us as well?’ Rich asks sardonically, looking at you with your eyebrows raised as if waiting for an answer. At least until Lilly elbows him sharply in the ribs. 

‘It’s so nice to see you and to see you too, Papa. Hello!’ She says leaning around you to offer Terzo a wave. He stands dusting crumbs from his face and his shirt and carefully keeping some space between you as he shifts to see them both. 

‘Hello, Sister…’ He glances at you and you realise he has never met them before and some introductions are in order.

‘Lilly, Ter… Papa, this is Lilly and Rich. We work together in the kitchens.’ Lilly smiles at him offering another wave which he returns but Rich still doesn’t look impressed, clearly wanting to confront you both on what he saw.

‘Ah, si. Hello, Sister Lilly and Brother Rich. And I can assure you those pastries are delicious whether fed from my own hands or not.’ He switches his Papa persona on, and it’s a little jarring after all this time. ‘Sorella here, I have tired her out having her carry all these bags of things I wanted. I thought I better not tire her arms any further.’ 

‘Right,’ Rich replies slightly at a loss for words. You don’t think his story has helped the situation at all but though he looks a little awkward and uncomfortable, it doesn’t seem like Terzo really minds the two of you getting caught, so you take a deep breath and relax.

‘All this shopping and eating… I could do with another coffee, I think. Si…’ He nods to himself, already heading towards the coffee stall. ‘Anyone else?’ He asks almost as an afterthought and you all nod. ‘Four coffees then, ok.’ The three of you watch him go but as soon as he is out of earshot, they both turn to you.

‘What the hell was that?’ Rich asks in an angry whisper. ‘I thought you were just doing your job and he was far too stressed about getting fired to try it on? Not that it looked like he had to try that hard…’ He had always been protective of the three of you, but you couldn’t help feeling defensive when he had no idea what had been growing between you.

‘Oh leave her be, they both looked happy while they were doing it. What does it matter?’ You smile at Lilly appreciatively, thankful for her understanding.

‘Guys, please just listen.’ You knew you had to explain something. ‘We, well, look, we just-’ You can’t even find the words to start. It’s not like with Mona where you can tell her everything and she just understands, not that you have time for that anyway. You glance over to the stall and see him standing in line, carefully studying the menu and certainly not looking back over every few seconds. ‘I… I can’t really explain what we are; not at the moment,’ you sigh. ‘But Lilly is right, we are happy, everything is fine.’ 

‘You do look happy, and he looks better too.’ Lilly says reassuringly and you breathe a sigh of relief. 

‘Yeah, no one can accuse you of slacking on feeding him.’ Both you and Lilly turn to glare at him.

‘Don’t be a dick, Rich!’ she admonishes him, treating him to another elbow to the ribs.

‘What?’ He says defensively rubbing his side. ‘He is looking a lot more well-fed than he ever did before.’ It isn’t an apology but it is probably as close as you will get from Rich. 

‘Could you guys just keep this between us, please?’ You feel like you are begging, but the last thing you want is people finding out about the two of you through gossip. You hadn’t really thought about it or discussed it but you were sure that Terzo would like to tell his brothers himself when the time was right.

‘Keep what? There’s nothing to tell anyway, right Rich?’ She threatens him with her elbow one last time but relents when he agrees with a flinch.  

‘Right, nothing to tell.’ The three of you look at him just as he looks away sharply and he gets handed the tray of coffees. You feel a little relief but the silence is awkward as you wait for him to make his way back over. 

‘Caffè for everyone!’ He announces on his return and you each take a cup.

‘Thank you Papa, that was very kind,’ Lilly thanked him genuinely. ‘But we better get going. We have a list. Mona has really taken to bossing us around since you've been gone.’ You know she is joking, but it still sends a pang through you. As happy as you are in your current position, you do miss them. ‘Anyway, it was lovely to see you! Bye!’ She grabs Rich by the elbow and drags him away with only one last glare over his shoulder. 

‘Terzo, I’m sorry,’ You say slumping back onto the bench.  

‘They didn’t know about us?’ He asks cautiously. He sits beside you but leaves enough space to be considered decent and keeps his hands to himself. You can’t decide if you are disappointed or not. 

‘No, they didn’t.’ You shoot him a sideways glance and he is looking down at his coffee, his expression unreadable. 

‘So, you haven’t spoken to anyone about…?’ He trails off, neither of you at a point of being able to define what is going on between you. ‘Even before, you didn’t seek out your friends?’

‘Well I did… Mona, but I trust her. She would never say anything.’ He holds up a hand to halt you and you feel a bubble of panic starting to grow in your chest.

‘That’s not what I meant, cara mia.’ He finally looks at you now and the bubble dissolves. His eyes are warm, full of care. ‘I am glad you spoke to your friend about this, just as I am glad of her discretion. I would hate to think about you being so upset and also alone.’

‘You were dealing with it all alone.’ His hand rests on the bench between you and you place yours over the top. It feels wrong not to be touching at all during such a conversation. 

‘Ah, I am used to it,’ he says, brushing you off. ‘I am used to it.’ He turns his hand under yours loosely lacing your fingers together. ‘And anyway, I am not alone anymore am I?’ It’s a slow smile that grows across his face, like he is only just realising it now. 

‘No you aren’t,’ you confirm, squeezing his hand and returning his smile. If you had your way he would never be alone again. 

‘May I ask,’ he pauses like he isn’t sure he wants to ask what he is about to say. ‘Why you didn’t tell your other friends?’ But this is something you can easily offer him an answer to.

‘Well it’s just… Lilly is young, she is only twenty. It feels a little odd talking to her about relationships when she feels like a little sister, and Rich? Well, he is the biggest gossip in the whole kitchen. It’s not that I don’t trust him, but he just gets a little carried away sometimes.’ You can’t help your fond smile. ‘And he is pretty protective of us, even if he can be a little bit of a dick about it.’

‘I see, I see.’ He seems happy enough accepting your reasons. ‘Are you ok?’ He inches a little closer now, already over keeping a sensible distance. 

‘Yeah, I am.’ You decide even as you are saying it. The confrontation with your friends could have gone better, but it could have gone a lot worse. And it’s better you get caught by your friends then any other random inhabitant of the Abbey. In fact, you should have foreseen this happening, going out together so close to home. You wonder if he feels the same though. ‘Are you?’

‘Si, I think it is time to go home though,’ he says and you nod in agreement. You think you have both had enough excitement for today. ‘I called for a car while I was waiting for the coffee,’ he admits a little sheepishly. 

‘Oh, thank Satan.’ Your relief is palpable, both your full stomach and your sore shoulders thankful. ‘I thought we were going to have to carry all of this back.’ 

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

Presentation is the second most important consideration and for that you need a suitable foundation. Depending on the number of people you are catering for you need a vessel large enough to hold enough food. The material is less important, dictated by aesthetic preference, whether you prefer wood, glass, slate or porcelain. Consider whether you need vessels for particular ingredients, additional cutlery to serve. By planning for all eventualities you make sure the meal is a success.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

With a plea from you and an order from Terzo a ghoul assists in carrying the bags back to his rooms, leaving them on the kitchen table before departing to wherever it is ghouls go when off duty. You begin to unpack, starting to sort out the haul to put in the appropriate storage but he comes behind you taking your wrists in his hands and steers you back out of the kitchen. 

‘Mia cuocoina please,’ he murmurs against the back of my head. ‘I need peace for the art I am about to create.’ You try to suppress your laugh but it comes out an inelegant snort.

‘I can help,’ you reply, twisting in his arms to look at him. ‘Just tell me what you want me to do.’ 

‘No,’ he says, shaking his head. ‘It is my turn to make food for you!’ He continues shepherding you backwards towards his office. ‘Go have a nap, visit friends, whatever.’ he drops a kiss on your lips before spinning you back around. 

‘You may come back in two hours,’ he swats at your ass as he opens the door and lets you out into the hallway. 

You pause for a moment wondering where you even wanted to go. Going back to your rooms wasn’t very appealing, there were no distractions there and you knew the time would crawl by. The kitchens were out of the question right now if you didn't want to be subjected to the interrogation you were spared in town, something you were keen to avoid as long as possible. The gardens were an option except you could still feel the ache in your arms from carrying the bags around the market and you know for certain if Primo catches you in the garden there was no chance you would be leaving unencumbered by whatever vegetables he could give you. 

Your wandering takes you past the upper clergy offices, mostly dark and unused of a Saturday afternoon but you spot movement behind one of the doors and you are not surprised when you realise whose it is. There is only one person you know that would willingly work on a Saturday and fortunately that was a person you had been meaning to speak to. Since you and Terzo had joined his brothers for lunch in fact. You had no sweet treats prepared for him today but you were sure he could do with a break. He could always do with a break. 

Approaching the closed door you knock softly and wait for him to answer and the slightly frantic scuffling you can hear lets you know you won’t have to wait long. But a few moments pass before he answers the door. His exhaustion is plain on his face, sadly not much different than any of the other times you have seen him lately. 

‘Sorella,’ he says with a tired smile when he registers it is you at his door. ‘How can I help you today?’

‘I found myself at a loose end and saw you were working!’ You explain as he holds the door open for you and gestures to the seat before his desk. ‘And why are you working on a Saturday?’

‘There is so much to do and so little time,’ he says, flopping back into his chair with a heavy sigh. ‘I was not busy today anyway so I thought why waste time when there is so much to catch up on.’ The clergy’s decision to remove Terzo from his position has caused more problems than you had first thought. You can’t help thinking how odd it is that no new Papa had been appointed after all these months when there was clearly a need but you set that aside for now.

‘Even you need a break Cardinal.’ You struggle to keep the worry from your voice.

‘Well you are here, let's have a break now.’ His smiles grows more genuine as he speaks. ‘I wished to speak with you anyway.’ 

‘Yes me too,’ you agree. It makes it easier now that he has brought it up himself. ‘I have been meaning to come and see you since the lunch but well, you know Papa, he was keeping me busy. Even on my day off he had me going into town with him to the farmers market.’ You are starting to worry your blush is becoming permanent and you hope your smile isn’t as sappy as it feels. If you plan to continue keeping your relationship quiet you really need to get better at schooling your reactions. 

‘Si, I imagine Papa has lots to keep you busy.’ he agrees laughing but his face turns serious. ‘He is.. Well he is treating you well Sorella?’ He pauses, seeming to choose his words carefully, his fingers coming up to play with his moustache nervously. ‘Like a gentleman? When things are hard I think sometimes he can forget he is a good man.’ You sense that Copia may be talking from personal experience and having seen that side of Terzo yourself you are keen to reassure him.

‘I think I understand what you mean, Cardinal, he …’ You pause thinking over your wording just as carefully. ‘When I first began working for him he was different, while everything was fresh but he, we, found a compromise. He has apologised for some of his more thoughtless actions.’ Copia raises his eyebrows and you panic momentarily. ‘Oh nothing so bad and really, I had a lot of sympathy for his situation. I wasn’t expecting him to be at his best.’ 

‘It was regrettable what happened.’ He takes off his beretta and runs his hands through his hair. ‘It .. well it was unexpected for all of us, I think but it is good to see him doing better.’ He does look genuinely relieved even though the situation has clearly impacted him. ‘All this food seems to be doing the trick eh?’

‘The food probably has helped, yes,’ you laugh, and the rest you thought, keeping that to yourself. ‘But I think it is really just time, Cardinal.’ He would have improved with or without you over time but you do like to think you have helped him move on a little faster then he may have done otherwise. 

‘Now, can we discuss those notes you brought me to translate?’ His direct questions bring you straight back down from your romantic imaginings.

‘I was waiting for you to bring them up.’ You know you owe him something of an explanation  but you are not above waiting to see what he has worked out for himself.  

‘They, well I suppose I don’t know enough to say really,’ he begins confidently before tailing off. ‘But they didn’t read like professional recipes.’

‘That's because they weren’t but Cardinal, it’s not my place to say more, not that I even really know anymore.’ In this at least you can be honest. You could probably make a good guess as to who wrote out the recipes but you aren’t willing to voice that now. ‘He gave me some recipes and he never said where they came from or why that was all he wanted and I didn’t feel it was my place to ask. There were things said at lunch that might have given me some clues but even so.’ 

‘Si, before. I noticed that too.’ He takes a deep breath before continuing. ‘It has not been long since I was considered an outsider to them and outsiders really know very little by design. If it hadn’t been announced that I was also Nihils son then that would still be the case. But even though I never grew up the way that they did, well Secondo and Terzo anyway, I was here in the Ministry already and I saw what happened.’ 

You say nothing, waiting for him to continue sensing his need to unburden himself. 

‘I was brought up as an orphan you see and while most children in the church are brought up communally, orphan or otherwise, the Emeritus brothers were always separate.’ He switches into lecture mode but you still hang on his every word. There were very few people you mixed with who had been a member of the church for so long. ‘Primo has always been here, his mother was a Sister of great reputation chosen especially to birth an heir but Terzo and Secondo, their mothers must have met Nihil on his travels because they weren’t brought to the church until the were ten, Secondo only a few months before Terzo.’  

‘What happened to their mothers?’ A part of you feels bad even asking but your curiosity wins out. You would not feel comfortable asking Terzo himself this but it feels like the last piece in a puzzle you had been building since you had accepted this position. 

‘They just carried on with their lives I suppose. I know Primo fought with Nihil about it, that their mother’s should have been invited to join them or at least to visit but it was decided. No distractions, they had had ten years of normal life and now they were to prepare for their future as men of the Emeritus line.’ His expression turns wry as he continues. ‘It makes me almost glad that he didn’t acknowledge me until recently. I might have liked having brothers growing up though.’ You pat his arm where it rests on the desk offering what little comfort you can.  

‘Anyway I know Terzo’s mother tried for a while, sending packages of food and presents for him but I don’t know what happened after that. One day they just stopped coming.’ Your heart clenches, for Terzo, for Copia, for all of them. They may be in some of the most powerful positions in the Clergy but it was clear they had all been forced to sacrifice a lot for the privilege. 

‘It sounds like it wasn’t easy for any of you.’ Like any organisation there were machinations going on far above the notice of normal members like yourself, you weren’t naïve enough to think otherwise but you found it jarring learning that somewhere that had felt immediately like home and safety to you had treated these men so poorly.  

‘No I suppose not.’ He rubs his hands over his face, the conversation having turned heavier than either of you expected. After a moment he offers you a tired smile. ‘Now tell me more about this farmers market.’ You while away the rest of the time describing in detail the stalls and the tasters and when you eventually leave you hope you both are feeling a little lighter. 

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

Once you have your vessel and your ingredients prepared then all that is left is the arrangement. There are endless ways to arrange the food enticingly. If you want your dish to be eye-catching and mouth watering you must consider the balance of colour and texture. You can create contrast with light and dark meats or cheeses. You may introduce pops of colours with fresh fruits and berries and mix textures with a soft cheese, a juicy fruit and a crisp cracker. Complimentary flavours could be grouped, the arrangement of your board encouraging certain combinations both traditional and daring. Your final result will be a visually appealing and delicious dish to present.

• • • • • • • • ✦ • • • • • • • • • •

It’s been a long time since you have had to knock before entering his quarters but it feels appropriate now, giving him a chance to finish the final touches to his creation before you enter. You almost reach the point of knocking again, wondering if he hadn’t heard you when he pulls the door open. He was still wearing his shirt and trousers but he had borrowed your apron.

‘This looks good on you,’ you tease, pulling at the strap around his neck, but he only takes your hand and leads you inside.

‘Now cara mia you are in for a treat if I do say so myself.’ When you reach the dining room he stops you, placing his hands over your eyes as he guides you the final distance. ‘No peaking now,’ He says as he positions you at the end of the table. 

‘Ta daaa,’ He uncovers your eyes and as you blink you can’t help but be impressed. The centre of the table is covered in what may be every plate in the kitchen; each one has a different cheese and its suggested accompaniments arranged around it. You had fought valiantly for any cheeses other than Italian but he had refused to budge keen for you to taste all of his favourites. He pours you a glass of wine, a deep red and hands you a glass. 

‘This is Barolo, aged in oak caskets it is the most decadent of Italian wines. The King of wines they call it.’ You take a sip and examine the flavours. It is rich, fruity and floral but with an earthiness that should pair well with your meal this evening. You were by no means a wine expert but your palette was well developed over your career and you can tell an expensive wine when you taste one. 

‘Terzo this is very extravagant,’ you stop when he raises his hand.

‘You deserve the best, cara mia, as does this cheese!.’ He gestures across the table and you survey all the options before you, savouring another sip of the wine. In the middle he has laid out a selection of crackers, water, butter and grain in a variety of different shapes. There was crumbling gorgonzola drizzled with honey to calm the bite of the blue veins and topped with quartered grapes and shelled pistachios. Slices of nutty pecorino sit between folded slices of ham generously filled with halved figs and walnuts. Cubes of provolone mixed with slices of olive oil, cured sopressata and green olives and taleggio and apple slices wrapped in salty prosciutto. Finally a bowl of whipped mascarpone, dark red cherry and balsamic dressing pooling between the peaks and whole cherries and pecans sinking into the soft cheese. 

He pulls out your chair for you, getting you comfortably seated then he goes to take off the apron before joining you at the table waiting as you take in the whole spread. It is strange being on the receiving end of such a gesture. You can’t remember the last time someone had prepared an extravagant meal for you like this, even if he had only sliced and arranged the food, it was clear how much effort he has put in to impress you.

He lets you start helping yourself to the plate closest to you when you struggle to decide where to begin with so many enticing options. The two of you are quiet for a time only pausing to express your pleasure with the flavours to each other. After trying at least two helpings of each cheese you sit back with your wine before your stomach begins protesting after your second round of overindulging for the day.

‘Thank you for doing this Terzo,’ you say as you watch him assemble another mouthful. ‘I’m not sure I remember the last time someone did this for me.’ He pauses before taking a bite, looking at you in surprise.

‘Is that so?’ He looks thoughtful as he finishes off his mouthful, getting every trace from his fingers. ‘You are very welcome, cara mia. In fact I enjoyed doing this more than I thought.’ 

‘Am I out of a job now?’ You joke just to watch his eyes widen in panic.

‘Hold on no no!’ He shakes his head emphatically. ‘I did not mean that at all. I will always prefer your incredible cooking.’ 

‘I suppose I will stick around then,’ you reassure him.

‘Thank Satan as much as this was fun. I could not imagine doing it everyday, multiple times.’ He looks exhausted just thinking about it. ‘You are a superwoman, mia cuocoina.’ 

‘I’m not, I just enjoy it,’ you explain. You always had since you were young and had followed your mother around the kitchen.

 ‘Why do you think you were so drawn to cooking?’ He asks. It wasn’t something you had thought much about before. It had just been a fact of your life. 

‘Well I like food obviously,’ you say with a laugh but you pause as you think of what it is you enjoy most about it. ‘I think it's just such a big part of our lives, we have to eat to survive so why not make that as enjoyable as we can?’ Of course it is your job and has been for the longest time but there is a more personal element to it, especially when it comes to people you care about. ‘And you know if you can cook you can make your friend a delicious soup when they are ill, you can make their favourite pasta dish after they just got dumped or you can bewitch a man by making his stomach fall for you first,’ you finish with a wink.

‘Mmmm I see,’ he says sipping his wine, his eyes going heavy lidded as he regards you. ‘So this was your plan was it?’ His voice goes deep and teasing and you shift in your seat. 

‘No, just a happy accident.’ You lean towards him without even noticing, so easily drawn into his orbit. ‘I think my food was just too good for you to resist.’ He nods in agreement, conceding to your point but this conversation is far from its end.

‘And what about you?’ He holds your gaze, keeping you attentive to his every word. 

‘What about me?’ You ask, tilting your head not quite understanding his question.

‘What made you unable to resist your Papa?’ You swallow thickly. There are so many reasons you wouldn’t even know where to start.

‘You don’t need me to tell you how irresistible you are.’ you say instead. You aren’t against stroking his ego usually but you know he is well aware of his affect on people and you in particular. 

‘I have my own charms. I am in no doubt about that.’ He says confidently and you know it is true. ‘You though? I think it is a little different than any I have seduced before.’

‘Oh?’ You have an inkling where he is going with this. You had your suspicions that there were a lot more feelings involved then either of you were used to in your past relationships but this didn’t feel like the build up to a heartfelt confession. He was looking at you as if he had been leading you to a trap and you had just fallen in. 

‘You like feeding me.’ he states, matter of fact, placing his wine glass down on the table.

‘Yes we have discussed that.’ You are sure the two of you had discussed how you enjoyed taking care of him even as early as your first dinner together.  

‘No we haven’t. Feed me.’ His voice is hard but not cold as he orders you but you hesitate.

‘What?’ You think back trying to clear your confusion and you remember the lunch or more specifically just before when you had been reassuring him in his bedroom. You had known then that he wouldn’t drop that forever but it still didn’t make you any more prepared. 

‘I am not yet satisfied. Feed me.’ You swallow again, unable to control your body's reaction to his strict demands. You want to obey him, to feed him but again you hesitate. 

‘Terzo …’ He gives you a stern look cutting you off before you can continue. ‘Papa?’ It comes out as a question but it seems obvious what he wants. He rewards you with a smirk. 

‘I want some more gorgonzola, si,’ He encourages as you take a water cracker and begin to load it with cheese. ‘Plenty of honey too per favore then be a brava cuocoina and feed it to me. Then I will explain.’ You offer him the cracker and he tuts at you shaking his head.

‘Uh uh,’ he sighs. ‘Do it properly.’ He pushes the plates to the side and pats the table in front of him. You stand uncertainly but he pats the table again until you sit before him and offer him the cracker a second time. He scoots his chair forward forcing you to spread your legs to accommodate him but now he is in the perfect position for you to place the food in his waiting mouth. He chews slowly, moaning low as the flavours combine and harmonise on his tongue. 

‘Mia cuocoina, I think the taleggio now, no?’ You take his suggestion, the rolls of prosciutto and apple are much easier to feed him. He watches you for a moment before continuing. ‘There were clues you see but I did not notice at first. Now though, now your Papa understands.’ You offer him the next bite but his warm hand closes around your wrist holding you in place. 

‘You kiss me differently, did you know this? After we have eaten, you like me tasting of food you made me I think.’ You feel like you can’t breathe as he begins listing all the things he has noticed. ‘And my clothes, you look at me differently too, when things get a little tighter, tighter than they used to be. You like seeing how I have changed with every meal you have fed me I think.’ You can’t deny it because what he says is true. A part of you had hoped he might not have noticed everything but with every word that hope gets smaller and smaller. 

‘And now here. Your heart is racing and yet all I have done is eat a little from your own hands.’ He pauses to take a bite, his teeth sinking into the soft cheese and crisp apple and just grazing the tip of your fingers. ‘You enjoy feeding me, more than you realise I think.’ 

‘Papa I …’ You don’t know what to say. He doesn’t look angry or upset but you feel the urge to apologise even as words fail you. He swallows the last bite freeing your wrist.

‘Shhh it is ok mia cuocoina.’ His hands trail down to your ankles tracing miscellaneous shapes into your skin. ‘Cherries now per favore. The balsamic cherries with the mascarpone. His fingers creep up your calves ghosting the shape of you before hooking behind your knees. He pulls you forward until you are sitting at the edge of the table. You lean across him, choosing a butter cracker, the thicker texture better to support the soft cheese. 

‘I am craving something sweeter,’ he explains. You bring it to his lips, the cherry juice starting to drip down your fingers and he catches it with his tongue leaving a sticky trail behind it before closing his lips over the mouthful. Your breath catches in your throat and his eyelids droop seductively as he sucks the last traces of juice and cheese from your fingers. 

‘That didn’t quite hit the spot,’ he says, hands already sliding your skirt up your thighs until he can clearly see your underwear and the wet patch there is little point trying to hide. ‘Ah so I was right. You do enjoy hand feeding your Papa.’ He spreads your legs even further so he can lean close enough that you feel his steady breathing against you. ‘After all that fuss.’ He grazes his teeth over your clit, the material of your underwear protecting you but the threat still makes your thighs shake. When he does bite down it’s only on the hem of your underwear as he pulls them to the side leaving you bare to him for the first time.

He just looks at first holding you in suspense but in a split second his tongue is all over you yet somehow still not hitting any places you wanted him, needed him. Around and around he swirls his tongue over your folds, then the most gentle suction. Little sounds of enjoyment he seems unaware of that vibrate through you as he tastes you thoroughly. But his teasing as you fed him, his sucking and nipping at your fingers had already got you ready for so much more. Giving in you lace your fingers through his hair to guide him to exactly where you want his attention most but he resists all your attempts, making the frustration inside you build and build. You try another tactic grinding your hips against his face but he pulls away pressing your hips down onto the table and stopping any further movement and forcing a whine from deep in your chest.

‘Cuocoina, please. I am just trying to properly enjoy my meal.’ He pauses to lick a long stripe, tongue flat and broad to give you as much friction as possible. You can’t breathe, not for a moment, the sudden rush of pleasure the only thing your mind can comprehend but almost as soon as it starts it ends the only thing you can feel are the puffs of his warm breath.

‘But perhaps you would prefer to feed me this too?’ He positions himself that he is a hair's breadth away from you before his vice-like grip on your hips loosens. ‘Feed me’ he growls and you have to obey.

You grind your hips against him over and over, his tongue finding your entrance making your thighs shake as you fight to get him even deeper. Your foot loses purchase where it had settled on the arm of his chair and you scream as your clit catches the tip of his nose. One of his hands finds its way to your thigh helping to steady you but the other creeps up your body underneath your dress. He cups your breast over bra, his maddening fingers finding your already hard nipple through the light material pinching and twisting until you can't decide if you want to arch into his teasing hand or push back against his face. 

‘Papa! Terzooo,’ you moan his name in frustration, struggling as your pleasure builds to take what you need from him but he finally takes pity on you, hooking both your legs over his shoulders and lifting your hips clean off the table.

‘Fuck mia cuocoina,’ he growls against your core. He sucks your clit long and hard until you scream your toes curling against his back. ‘Sei la cosa migliore che abbia mai assaggiato, cazzo.’ You barely register his switch to Italian, too busy chanting his name in your pleasure fuelled delirium.

You are so close to the edge when his lips close over you sucking and sucking while his tongue swipes over your clit over and over again. You can feel it building, a charge shooting through your nerves from the soles of your feet to the palms of your hand and you continue babbling his name, repeating until it is almost meaningless. He pinches your nipple, hard, and you arch up from the table with a gasp just as he slides a finger inside you curling it perfectly to press against your g spot. 

Every bit of air is forced from your lungs as your orgasm overtakes you. Your ears begin to ring as the force of it pulses through your body and what feels like every muscle contracting and releasing as you gasp for air. Your hands are still gripping at his hair keeping him in place not that it is needed as he laps at you greedily, catching every last drop of your orgasm. 

‘Making sure you are well fed?’ You giggle deliriously, still feeling somewhat detached from reality. You release your death grip on his hair and he sets your hips back down on the table helping you ease the vice-like grip of your thighs around him. His face is wet with your slick but it only emphasises his flushed cheeks. He grins at you in satisfaction, his eyes sparkling as he takes in the state he has made of you.

He pulls you back upright by your hands after straightening your underwear and your dress but this time no one could mistake the treatment you had just received. Your balance has not yet returned and so helps you into his lap where you can lean against his warm body. As you get settled you can feel his hardness trapped beneath you but as you reach for him cupping him through his trousers, he catches your wrist gently and instead wraps your arms around his neck. He distracts you by stealing kisses and you discover you almost enjoy the taste of you on his lips as much as you enjoy the taste of the food you make him.   

He slows your frantic kisses down, only offering you slow pecks to help you actually catch your breath. He rubs your back soothingly over your dress and encourages you to rest against him but you still end up clinging to his shoulders to help keep you upright as the haze of your pleasure recedes leaving you exhausted. He tucks your hair behind your ear, his hand settling at the back of your neck.

‘Mmm, now I am satisfied,’ he whispers against your lips before distracting you again with his captivating kisses. 

[lilypadlys]

Mushy May Day Eleven - Papa Time

Ship: Copia/Ghouls

Notes: Prompt list by @forlorn-crows. See prompt list here

Word Count:  1177

Read on AO3 or below the cut

Today was just going to be one of those days. Copia sighs to himself running through his mental checklist of the tasks that had to get done. The post tour grace period has long since ended and there is so much to do.

Make sure the altar in the chapel is stocked with incense, candles, and other necessities for mass, taking confession, band practice, and the never ending stacks of paperwork. Add on personal tasks like cleaning out his rats’ cage and tidying his own room and it quickly begins to feel impossible to get done. To top it all off, his physical checklist of the day’s tasks has gone missing so now he’s relying on memory to make sure it all gets done.

“Papa has a busy day today.” He explains to his rats. “But I’ll make sure to clean out your cage this afternoon miei cari.” He bids his rats farwell and heads to the chapel.

On the way in, Copia practically runs into Swiss and Rain on their way out.

“Good morning Papa!” Swiss greets enthusiastically while Rain nods in more sedate greeting.

“Good morning my ghouls. You’re up early.” He adds, mostly to Rain.

The water ghoul shrugs.

“Swiss drug me out of bed. ”

“Hmm, there’s more coffee in the kitchens.”

Even with his mask on Copia can see Rain’s excitement from the way his shoulders perk up. And the way he starts tugging Swiss in that general direction.

“I’ll see you at practice then.” Copia calls after them with a chuckle.

He heads to the altar and opens the cabinets underneath ready to start tallying supplies only to find them fully stocked. The altar itself is also freshly tidied with new candles ready to be lit and fresh roses sitting in a vase on its surface.

“Huh.”

Maybe a sibling or one of the cardinals took care of it after mass last week. At least that's one thing out of the way. Now finding himself with a bit of time before confession, Copia takes the opportunity to light a candle pray in the meditative silence of the empty chapel.

That’s how Mountain finds him a little while later. The earth ghoul silently joins him in prayer for a few minutes before they both rise.

“Hello Papa. I hope I’m not interrupting.”

“Of course not my ghoul. The chapel is open to all at any time.”

“You’re taking confession today right?”

“That’s right. Was there anything you wanted to discuss?”

“Actually, I know things have started to get really busy for you again. If it helps, would you like me to take over confession duty today?”

“Grazie, that’s very sweet of you. I appreciate it.” Copia gives Mountain’s arm a soft pat.

As siblings start to filter in, Copia heads back to his chambers. Perhaps with the extra time he can give his rats baths as well. To his surprise he finds Cirrus, Cumulus, and Aurora waiting outside his door.

“Hi Papa! I wanted to finally meet your rats!” Aurora chirps and how can Copia say no to that smile nor the chance to show off his babies.

“Haha alright. They’d love to meet you too.”

The four of them head in and Aurora skips to the cage on Copia’s dresser.

“Hi!” She waves a finger at them and they run up to the wire to say hello in little squeaks. “What’s their names?”

As Copia introduces Feta, Cheddar, Gouda, and Brie, Cirrus and Cumulus get the bathroom ready for a rat spa day. The ghoulettes settle into a rhythm of cleaning off and drying each rat. The girls disappear to the bedroom to rat sit while Copia finishes cleaning and resetting the cage. By the time he returns, Aurora has managed to teach the rats a choreographed dance which the four of them watch in delight.

Finally they’re done, the rats back in the cage, and Copia having the distinct sense that his room feels tidier somehow. He doesn’t have time to dwell on it though as it’s time for band practice.

As a group, Copia and the ghoulettes head to the practice rooms. They find the rest of the pack on time and ready to get started, a surprisingly rare occurrence. Aether and Sunshine are even there and things quickly turn into an impromptu jam session. It’s a blast, everyone taking turns as solos on their various instruments and just generally being silly. It’s a mood boost that they all needed and they all feel giddy afterwards.

As they go to pack up, Sunny and Aether duck out, but Phantom approaches Copia.

“Hey Papa. We were wondering if you wanted to join us for movie night tonight?”

“I’d love to!” Copia is quick to agree but then frowns. “Ah, but I have mounds of paperwork waiting for me…”

“Okay, no problem. Feel free to join us if you finish early though.”

The pack heads off to their wing and Copia to his office. He’s been running on a pretty good mood most of the day but the dark cloud of paperwork threatens to dampen it. Until it doesn’t. Copia opens his office door to find the stack of paperwork he knew was waiting for him missing.

“Eh?”

A quick scan of the office reveals the desk to be tidy and organized even though he knows he left it a mess and his papers are nowhere to be found. Wonderful. Now he’s going to have to explain to Sister Imperator that not only is his paperwork not done but also that he lost it.

When he reaches her office however it’s to find her reviewing the offending documents.

“Hello dear. Need something?”

“Eh, uh, hello Sister. It's that…my paperwork?”

“Yes? Two of your ghouls brought it over just now. I must say the pink sparkly pens are an interesting touch,” She holds a page aloft to let him see the neat but very much pink lines of writing. “But everything seems to be in order.”

“Uh, my other pens went missing…”

“Make sure you add some new ones to the supply list then.” Imperator waves him out and Copia finds himself standing outside her office very confused.

At least he can attend movie night after all.

He heads to the ghoul wing to find the pack settling in in the common room. The scent of freshly popped popcorn wafts in from the kitchen and the title menu of The Shining plays on the TV.

The pack makes various chipper noises of greeting and wave him over to the center couch. Dewdrop brings several large bowls of popcorn in. Pretty soon he’s surrounded by his ghouls as they curl up to watch the movie.

“Everyone ready?” Aether asks.

Copia takes the chance to ask, “You all didn’t happen to plan this did you?”

Swiss smiles coyly. “Whatever do you mean Papa?”

The rest of the pack grins freely though, basically giving themselves away.

Copia smiles. “Nothing. Nevermind. I appreciate you all, my ghouls.”

Various expressions of appreciation from the pack are the reply.

[misty720]

True Love - Ch4: 

Another late night and Chara was already asleep with Kabel in their bed this time.   Papyrus entered to find a plate for him in the fridge, but he was so exhausted that he just wanted water and a shower.  On his way to the bathroom with a change of clothes and a towel he wondered why the hell Serif had a bathroom in his room but he didn't.  Then, he decided that would be their next project.  Speaking of the oldest, by the time Papyrus reached the bottom of the stairs, out walked a half asleep Serif.  "WHAT ARE YOU DOING AWAKE AT THIS HOUR, SON?" he asked with concern.

"I heard you come in and wanted to say goodnight..." Serif yawned.

"NYEH HEH!  GOODNIGHT, MY BOY.  I LOVE YOU, STINKER."  He wrapped his free arm around his oldest who was gaining height on him.

As Serif was sauntering back to his room, he turned back with a grimace that reminded Papyrus way too much of Chara and said, "Hey, Dad...  I don't... feel so great..."

"WELL, SON, YOUR ORDER WAS FOR THREE DOUBLE STACKED HAMBURGERS WITH TOPPINGS, A BASKET OF ONION RINGS, A SIDE OF BROCCOLI CHEDDAR SOUP, AND A SLICE OF MUD PIE WITH EXTRA WHIPPED CREAM AND YOU UNDOUBTEDLY ATE ALL OF IT PLUS WHAT YOUR BROTHER AND SISTER LEFT BEHIND.  I'D SAY YOU-"

"Oh shit!" Serif shouted darting into the bathroom closest to him to throw up.

"I SWEAR IF ONE CATCHES IT THE OTHERS HAVE TO CATCH IT.  HOLD ON, SON.  I'LL BE RIGHT BACK..."  Papa Papyrus was on it with the thermometer, medicine, and a mint-ginger tea because Serif always preferred tea when sick thanks to his aunt Frisk which the other two didn't grow up living with.  "YEP, IT'S A FEVER.  YOU CAUGHT WHATEVER BUG IS GOING AROUND.  I'M SORRY, SON.  IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN GET YOU?"

"No, Dad, I think I'm gonna crawl back to my bathroom so you can shower..."

"HAHA!  YOU CAN STAY IN HERE.  I'LL JUST STEAL YOUR BATHROOM A MOMENT.  I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE YOU IN THE FLOOR THOUGH."

"Sorry about the language earlier..." Serif apologized through a thick voice one had when sick.

"I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT THAT.  I'M WORRIED ABOUT YOU THREE KIDS," Papyrus sat in the side of the tub rubbing Serif's messy waved hair.  Suddenly he sat back up and hit the toilet again.

"Dad?..."

"YES, SON?" Papyrus answered ferfeiting his glass of water so his boy could wash the taste out along with his wash cloth to wipe his face.

"Thanks...  Dad, why couldn't we take after you?...  I hate being sick..."

"LUCK OF THE GENE DRAW, I SUPPOSE.  ARE YOU GOING TO BE ALRIGHT WHILE I WASH WORK OFF OF ME?"

"Yeah...  I'm not my siblings.  I have more wit than that to come knock if something's wrong."

"I'M MORE CONCERNED ABOUT YOU PASSING OUT AND NOT BEING ABLE TO COME GET ONE OF US."

"What is all the noise about down here??" Chara asked coming around the corner from the living room.  "Pap??  Is everything...  Oh no, not you now?!"

"HEY, HONEY.  YEAH, THE STINKY ONE IS NEXT.  CARE TO SIT HERE A MOMENT?  I NEED TO SHOWER," Papyrus greeted her.

"Have you already given him medicine and everything?"

"YES, I JUST DON'T WANT TO LEAVE HIM WHILE HE'S THROWING UP."  Chara felt Serif's forehead to find it was burning hot, sighed, and gave her husband a parting kiss before taking his seat.

"Mom, I'm really okay by myself if you want to go back to bed," Serif groaned.

"I know you are, love.  But, we don't want to leave you alone.  You're still my baby even if you look down at me now.  You'll always be my boy and we'll always want to take care of you.  There will be a time we won't be able to be there and you'll have to do this on your own.  Now is not that time, my love," Chara soothed him best she could handing him his tea to sip.  "Your dad forgot the crackers.  Though... as much as you ate, you might not need them..."

"Mom?... Can you make me broth instead?"

"Of course, love.  I'll be right back."  Once Serif was tucked back in with a bucket by his bed, Chara told him, "Don't try to climb the stairs.  Call my phone and I'll come to you, okay?  I know you're big and think you can do things on your own, and many things you can, but I don't like leaving you alone when you're sick.  Don't sleep on your back either."  Serif nodded and tried to lay down to sleep.  Papyrus kissed his temple after Chara and they headed back upstairs.  Passing the bathroom, Chara stalled.

"ARE YOU ALRIGHT, DEAR?" her husband asked with concern for her this time.

"Actually... Pap... I haven't felt great today...  I don't- Oh shit!" she exclaimed in the same fashion as her son and hit the toilet.

"WELL," Papyrus scoffed, "THERE ARE LESS RUDE WAYS FOR YOU BOTH TO SAY YOU DIDN'T LIKE MY COOKING THAN TO TOSS IT."

"Shut... the hell up... Papyrus..." Chara struggled to joke back with her head in the porcelain.  "Paaap..." she whined tossing the rest of her stomach's contents.

Kneeling down, he felt her forehead to find she was also feverish.  "WOWIE!  YOU'RE HOT, AND NOT IN THE USUAL WAY I MEAN IT.  I'M GOING TO SKIP WORK TOMORROW AND TAKE CARE OF YOU BOTH."

"No... don't... don't worry 'bout me...  I'm fine, I can take care of myself and Serif..."

"NO YOU CANNOT.  LOVE, I KNOW YOU'RE STRONG BUT YOU HAVE ALSO COME DOWN WITH THIS BUG.  BESIDES," he leaned in rubbing her back, "YOU'RE MORE IMPORTANT THAN THAT."

"What about work though?...  They need you..."

"ELODIE CAN HANDLE A DAY BY HERSELF.  THE KITCHEN WILL BE FINE ONE DAY.  I LOVE YOU MORE THAN WORK.  I WOULDN'T HAVE HESITATED TO STAY HOME WITH SYLF OR KABEL EITHER, BUT I KNOW I CAN RELY ON YOU TO TAKE THAT RESPONSIBILITY SO I CAN FOCUS ON MAKING MONEY.  YOU NEED HELP NOW AND THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE FOR.  WE'RE A TEAM HERE AT HOME FIRST, THEN WORK.  REMEMBER?" Payrus assured his wife.

"It's been so long since I've actually needed takin' care of...  I forgot what it was like..."

"EXCUSE YOU.  I TAKE CARE OF YOU ALL THE TIME!"

"I know, Pap.  I was just teasing...  I don't feel well and was trying to take my mind off it."

"OH, I'M SORRY, DEAR.  YOU HANG TIGHT AND I'LL GET YOU MEDICINE, A TOWEL, A WET CLOTH, AND A GINGER-ALE."

"Thank you - I love you..."

"I LOVE YOU, MY DEAR, WITH ALL MY SOUL.  JUST REMEMBER THAT WHEN THINGS ARE ROCKY WITH THE BUSINESS AND WE'RE NOT TOGETHER AS MUCH."  He returned shortly with the promised items and pulled her shoulder length auburn hair out of her face.

"Papa?..." a small voice called from the doorway.  Sylfae had woken up hearing the commotion.

"YES, MINION?" he replied scooping her up to put her back to bed except he decided to put her with Kabel so he wasn't alone if he awoke.  He stepped into the bedroom to see his child had managed to stretch himself across half of the king sized bed.  "WONDERFUL..." he sighed.  "AT LEAST HE'S ASLEEP..."

"Is Momma okay?  Is her tummy bad too?"

"YES, PUMPKIN, MOMMA ISN'T FEELING WELL AND PAPA IS GOING TO TAKE CARE OF HER AND BUBBY.  THEY'RE BOTH ILL TONIGHT WITH THE BUG."

"Is-Is it my fault Momma and bubby are sick?" Sylfae asked tearing up while Papyrus covered her with her blankets.

"SHH... NO, PUMPKIN, NOT AT ALL.  EVERYONE JUST GETS SICK SOMETIMES, EVEN MOMMA," he reassured her.

"You're never sick..."

"MONSTERS DON'T CATCH HUMAN AILMENTS.  WE CAN HAVE DAYS WE DON'T FEEL WELL BUT HUMAN GERMS AND BACTERIA DON'T AFFECT US.  YOU KIDS AREN'T LUCKY IN THAT TO WHICH I AM SORRY.  NOW, LIE DOWN AND SLEEP.  YOU'RE GOING TO SCHOOL TOMORROW WHETHER YOU'RE TIRED OR NOT.  TWO DAYS IS PLENTY TO RECOVER."

"Yes, Papa.  I love you..."

"I LOVE YOU TOO, PUMPKIN.  GOODNIGHT."

"I love you more..."

"I LOVE YOU MORE, AND WE BOTH KNOW I CAN COUNT HIGHER.  SO, CLOSE THOSE PRETTY AMBER-RED EYES AND SLEEP."  Papyrus kissed her cheek and received one in turn before she rolled over and snuggled her favorite stuffed dinosaur that used to be Serif's.  After tucking both little ones in and feeling Kabel's forehead, he then ran back downstairs to check on Serif who was still battling the nausea while cradling the bucket.

"Dad?" Serif cried pitifully from the can.  "Dad, I don't feel good, I feel like crap, I want it to stop," he sobbed like small child as if he were his siblings' age again.  Hearing the distress in his son's voice broke Papyrus's heart.

"I KNOW, SON.  I'M SORRY.  I'M GOING TO BE HERE TONIGHT AND TOMORROW, ALRIGHT?  IT'S JUST A TWENTY-FOUR HOUR BUG.  IT WILL PASS, I PROMISE," he comforted the boy wrapping his boned arms gently around his shoulders and petting his crown.  Taking the bucket from him to set aside, Papyrus held his oldest while he cried a moment from just feeling awful.  "HEY, IT'S ALRIGHT.  I DON'T MIND YOU CRYING ON ME IN THE LEAST, BUT IT'S JUST GOING TO UPSET YOUR STOMACH EVEN MORE.  I'M SURE YOU FEEL BAD ENOUGH, SO TRY TO CALM DOWN, OKAY?  CAN YOU DO THAT FOR ME?"  Serif nodded and wiped his eyes on his sleeve but returned to hugging his dad.

"I'm sorry, I'm not used to being sick..."

"I KNOW.  YOU WERE THE HEALTHY ONE OF THE THREE.  BUT, DON'T BE SORRY AT ALL.  EVERYONE IS SICK SOMETIMES; IT'S A PART OF LIFE.  AND, I'M RIGHT HERE, HOWEVER, I DO NEED TO MAKE SURE MOMMA ISN'T DROWING IN THE TOILET."  Serif let him go in exchange for a clean trash can.  Papyrus returned to the bathroom to find Chara curled up on the floor like the children do when they're sick, too afraid to stray from the best receptacle for purging.  No one wanted to deal with the mess of being sick and flushing it away was the easiest clean up.  "WHAT CAN I DO, LOVE?" he asked sitting on the tub wall to pat her.

"Kill me...  please..." Chara groaned.

"NOPE, TRY AGAIN."

"Use some magic to rub my back...  That always feels nice..."

"THAT I CAN DO."  Tentative husband Papyrus lowered himself to the floor and gently massaged her back with a touch of his healing magic.  Had the magic been the kind that would help a virus, he would have cured all of his household.  Unfortunately, his healing was only good for physical damage such as broken bones and cuts or burns.  He did use this trick on all of them to calm them down or bring some kind of comfort.

"How is Serif?"

"DOING ABOUT AS WELL AS YOU, DEAR.  I JUST CHECKED ON HIM AND KABEL AFTER PUTTING MINION BACK TO BED."

"Thank you, Pap...  I can always count on you...  No matter what, even if things aren't going the best... even if I'm feeling like we're drifting apart, you always come back to remind me how much you truly love me and the kids...  I'm sorry I expect so much sometimes..." she started crying too.

"I'M SORRY THINGS HAVEN'T BEEN AS ROMANTIC OR EXCITING AS THEY USED TO BE...  I KNOW I HAVE BEEN SLACKING-"

"No!  No, you are wonderful, Pap.  I'm just still childish when it comes to your attention.  I know you're just trying to provide while also being happy with how you do it.  I understand... I just... miss you sometimes... when it's ten at night and your side of the bed is cold...  I know I can't have you here and working to make a living for us...  I wouldn't mind working to share the burden..."

"I DON'T WANT YOU TO WORK!  YOU TAKE A LOT OF BURDEN OFF BY BEING HERE FOR THE KIDS!  PLUS, THE FIRST TIME ANYONE WAS CROSS WITH YOU OR TALKED TO YOU THEY WAY THEY DO YOUR SISTER, I WOULD GO TO PRISON.  HONEY, I DON'T THINK YOU REALIZE HOW MUCH I MISS YOU AND THE KIDS.  I WOULD LOVE NOTHING MORE THAN TO BE HOME EVERY NIGHT BY EIGHT, BUT IT'S JUST NOT POSSIBLE TO PAY FOR EVERYTHING AND NOT PROPERLY MANAGE THE RESTAURANT.  I'M TRAINING ELODIE, BUT SHE'S NOT READY YET TO BE ON HER OWN MORE THAN A COUPLE OF DAYS AT A TIME.  IT WILL BE BETTER SOON, I PROMISE.  YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I APPRECIATE YOU FOR STICKING BY ME EVEN WHEN YOU FEEL LEFT OUT.  IT'S NEVER MY INTENT TO MAKE YOU FEEL THAT WAY EITHER.  YOU'RE SUCH A GOOD WOMAN AND A GREAT PARTNER, AND I'M SO GRATEFUL TO HAVE YOU IN MY CORNER.  I'M TRYING, I SWEAR.  I LOVE YOU DEEPLY, CHARA.  YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND, MY BETTER HALF, AND MY TRUE LOVE."

"Paaap... I lo-ugh... I love-"  Before she could finish her sentence, Chara hit the bowl with another bout of nausea.

"WELL, I'M SORRY MY DECLARATION OF TRUE LOVE MADE YOUR STOMACH TURN."

"Now is not... ugh... a good time for your smartass remarks..."

"SORRY, DEAR.  JUST TRYING TO BE LIGHTHEARTED TO HELP YOU FEEL BETTER.  BABY, I'M GOING TO MAKE MY BED ON THE COUCH SO I CAN HEAR YOU AND STINKER IF EITHER OF YOU NEED ME."

"Thank you... I love you... my best friend, my rock, my husband..."

"I LOVE YOU TOO.  TRY TO REST, LOVE."  It wasn't a lie.  Papyrus really did miss his family while working so much and would rather be home wrestling with his brood.  He truly preferred his lovely wife stay home and be comfortable while taking care of the other responsibilities.  But, he would also rather bust his proverbial ass at his own business, as his own boss, while doing what he loved than go back to working a mundane desk job sorting paperwork for someone else.  He loved working with his sister in law, but the politics he could do without.  He was much happier even if it meant sacrificing a little time now for more in the future because he didn't plan on going like this forever and looked forward to retiring earlier than he could if he were still with the Embassy.  His business had brought in more than enough to sustain them and provide luxuries, but only because he was so meticulously involved with it day in and day out for the six days it was open.  Papyrus had a plan for the long run and would eventually only be checking in a couple days a week or if they were short on occasion.  His passion was cooking, true.  And, he loved it, yes.  However, his true love was his family and being a husband and a father more than anything.

@papara-week

[schifty-al]

Palpatine's office: *ring* *click* Go for Papa Palpatine!... What do you mean he quit?... No no no you're telling me he just up and left the order?!... He even took the lightsaber?! Oh for fu- What, no! I'm not happy right now! Do you have any idea how long I've been planning this? It's been so long I can't even remember how old I am anymore! *beep* Hang on I'm getting another call. *click* What? I'm very busy right now! Oh, uhhh turkey club with sharp cheddar... Eh their soups haven't been all that great lately maybe just a salad... Well what're you getting?... Uh huh... That sounds good. Yeah okay I'll just do that, and look I gotta- what? Oh uh, just get me fresca. Bye. *click* Alright where were we... Oh just get another one, Chosen Ones don't just show up every couple of decades you know! I can't just make a clone and fill it with generically modified midi-chlorians! I tried and the Force told me to go fuck myself for it!

It was that simple

[the-frozen-pheonix]

Spring Self-Care; with Hello-Kitty

A Commission Prompt Submitted by a Secret Somebody (❁´◡`❁)

Everybody does things they enjoy every single day!

At school, we get to paint, and learn about English! My favorite class right now is music because I am learning how to play the piano all by my self! My teacher gives me music to take home and play too.

I like to play piano at home when mother cooks dinner. My mom makes apple pie for my family every Sunday. If there is left over ingredients, I make cookies too!

I live with my sister Mimmy, Mum, and Papa! Mimmy likes sewing things together, and watching the boys play outside. My papa forgets a lot of things but he always tells us he loves us and gives us presents whenever he can! Mama makes the best food ever and she always helps us clean up the house.

Sometimes grandpa Anthony and Grandma Margaret come over! Grandpa tell us fun stories and Grandma teaches us to sew. Mimmy is always excited to see them too.

Mama and papa taught me new activities to do in spring time. I am going to share them with my friends and family. Let me tell you about the new things I learned!

When the flowers outside bloom we gather them together to make bouquets! I like to put primroses in my sisters hair. Mama laughs when I put dog roses next to my bow an calls me Doggy. Silly Mama!

My favorite flowers are the ones on the apple trees. Papa says they turn into apples so I use other flowers to make Bouquets! Cheddar pink and cornflowers are pretty to put together because they are both spiky. That means the boys like them too!

If the sky is pretty and blue Mama will make more food with her pie and my cookies and we all go to the park for a picnic. Sometimes I see my friends and get to play with them after I eat! Sometimes we go to berry fields to pick strawberries and gooseberries. We snack on them at home after Mama makes them ready to eat.

Mama always keeps the house pretty and sometimes she asks us for help. Mimmy likes sewing the holes in couches and pillows. My favorite is arranging the pantry because we always find extra ingredients to make more cookies with!

When the nights are warm and cozy I like to lie on a blanket outside with Mama and watch the stars twinkle. Papa makes us good food on nights like this. For dessert on, Mama lets me help with the apple pie!

There is always so much fun in spring. What do you like to do when winter ends?

[mteresauy]

The Start of My Sabbatical Leave

22 April 2023

Exactly one week of living in Singapore, and one month or so since I last wrote here. It really felt like a decade with everything that has happened:

Resigning from work and last minute office dramas

The stress of last minute wedding preparation

The wedding

Emptying our whole home

Selling our household items

Selling our car

Putting our home for lease

Packing for our move to Singapore

Honeymoon in Boracay

Being sad that I will be leaving my parents

Being anxious of “offload stories”

Getting sick in between everything that is happening

Excited and nervous of the life ahead of us

What a ride! I thought I would not survive lol. I remember the day before our wedding, we are packing our things and I was so tired and stressed — I was crying and biting my newly manicured nails out of frustration (HAHA THOSE NAIL EXTENSION MAKES LIFE A LOT HARDER). I was constantly under the weather because of fatigue and anxiety. But I still held up, thanks to God, to Emman, and to our friends who supported us.

I was sad because our first home, which we fondly call “The Burrow” (Harry Potter reference), is very dear to me, to us. I carefully picked every household items we bought — items which will get sold only a year or two of using it. After I sold or gave away our belongings, I can’t help but cry. With Cheddar, our first car, I was sad too but not as much.

But I am happy because those were our “first home” and “first car”, meaning there will always be a next one. Now that we no longer have a car, and our house is on lease, we don’t need to be committed to staying in just one place. Whenever we are driving in Manila, Emman and I always dreamt of moving to a place where commuting is as convenient as owning a car. As I’m writing this, I am seating peacefully here in our little Singapore home (it’s actually a room, we are moving to our apartment next week), Emman is asleep, and I’m here thanking God for everything He has done.

I was sad because I was leaving my parents. When I was in PH I am always busy at work, I neglected going to their home during weekends. Now that I resigned from work, I moved to another country. For now, messenger video calls keep us connected. I plan to return to PH maybe in few months to surprise my Papa on his birthday.

But I am happy because Emman and I are together now. We vowed as husband and wife that we will be at each other’s side. I am happy that I am miles away from my previous toxic work environment. And I am happy and excited of the life ahead of us. It’s like being open to all kinds of possibility.

My first week here in Singapore is as uneventful as I could wish for. After all the happenings in our life in the past month, I just want to curl up in my little cocoon and be so damn lazy. We ate at the hawker center everyday (just like a true local lol). I watched all sorts of ig reels and youtube shorts while lying on the bed. I slept whenever I felt like it. Just what I said, I allowed myself to be lazzzy. To my defense, I managed to exercise, meditate, and journal most days of the week haha!

Next week will be the real “moving” week for us. We are moving to our rented apartment. Hopefully, I will also get a schedule for an appointment w for my Long Term Visit Pass so I can open a bank account and whatnots, and finally jumpstart our life here (welcome to my day in a life of a Filipina living in Singapore charot).

[starship-cafe]

707 Christmas Drabble

Pairing: 707/MC

Word Count: 325

Warnings: Christmas, Holidays

A/N: I don't know WHAT possessed me to be in a Christmas mood in August, but here we are. This is short, kind of choppy, and big cheesy but it's OKAY. I hope you enjoy 💕

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You knew he didn’t like Christmas.

And so, though it was your favourite holiday, you tried to avoid the topic as much as you could. As the winter months approached, you were ready for his aloof attitude concerning the festivities. You were expecting it when he brushed off his discomfort at the constant reminders of the childhood he was never allowed to enjoy. What you weren’t expecting, however, was for Saeyoung to walk through the front door of the bunker dragging an enormous pine tree behind him.

Your eyes widened in disbelief and your mouth opened to speak the words you couldn’t quite seem to find.

“Sae- Saeyoung Choi, what on EARTH are you doing?!”

He turned to look at you, an impish grin glued to his face. “It’s our Christmas tree! For Christmas!”

Your expression quickly melted from shock to glee as you leapt from the sofa and rushed to help him move the impressive tree into the center of the living room. You elected to ignore the trail of pine needles leading from the door to where you stood, and instead turned to face your husband.

“Are you… is this okay?” You asked softly.

His eyes shone with an unidentifiable emotion, equal parts melancholy and fondness, as he slowly nodded. “I’ve been giving it some thought and,” he took a sharp breath, grin returning, “I’d like to turn Christmas into something good in my mind.” He pulled you into his arms, nestling his head into your neck. “I want to make new memories with you.”

You smiled into his shoulder, and tears began to prick the corners of your eyes. He had come so far in such a short time, and you were so grateful you had the chance to be a part of his journey. You were proud of him. You squeezed him just a little bit tighter.

You knew he didn’t like Christmas.

But now, you hoped, he could start to.

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

Pairings: Romantic Romile (Roman x Emile), Romantic Prandy (Andy x Pryce), Romantic Anxtober (October x Virgil), Romantic Intrulosleepceit (Remus x Logan x Remy x Deceit)

Word Count: 2,170 Words

Summary: Flirting with Social Anxiety, kitten updates, the kids talk functions, an elusive cryptid sighting, and the video call feature is figured out.

Warnings: Caps, Food Mention, Insomnia Mention, Depression Mention, Demon Mention, Body Horror Mention, Cursing, Death Mention, Sick Character, Immunocompromised Character, let me know if I should tag anything else.

Note: Bolded and blockquoted are actions in their chatroom, not a message. Italic and blockquoted are transcripts of video calls.

Usernames, a quick translation guide: Andy: Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero), Belladonna: hazelnut, Castor: schrodingersdumbass, Dayd: carniverousroomba, Dice: Dr. Bitch, Emile: Thera-pissed, Eve: wall-e, Halley: aspermylastemail, Janus: SnekBoi, Logan: Momgan, Noah: nope, October: eatpavementido, Orion: birdgeoisie, Patton: Papa Bear, Pollux: satantakemehome, Pryce: SwEeTvErUcA, Remus: Octopussy, Remy: Coffee Bandit, Roman: waaahluigi, Sirius: literalsunshine, Teal: uwu, Thomas: shrexy, Virgil: spipples, Vita: þiccness

A Very Sanders Group Chat: Chapter 12

3:07 PM

shrexy: You know guys, it'd be nice if you quit for a bit.

spipples: We're right next to you, dammit. Just talk to us.

waaahluigi: Guys, he's looking at Thomas.

Dr. Bitch: You know what? I won't even ask.

4:57 PM

Coffee Bandit: I think they're trying to lie again or something.

Octopussy: Not Jan this time.

Momgan: We know, Remus.

Octopussy: Well, if I don't make note of it, who's going to prove that Jan wasn't involved?

Coffee Bandit: He's not wrong, Lo. Every time Thomas lies, Jan is implicated as the cause, even when he's not there.

Momgan: I hate that you aren't wrong.

7:12 PM

Thera-pissed: Sooooo. New boyfriend?

waaahluigi: THOMAS HAS A NEW BOYFRIEND!

spipples: We know, Roman. We're all a part of the same human. We all know this.

waaahluigi: I know but I'm just so happy about it!

spipples: And we all support you, Ro.

10:17 PM

þiccness: I have stolen the other girls, we're going to an underage club and coming back by 2am.

Thera-pissed: Just make sure you check Eve's glucose before you let her eat because she'll forget to check.

þiccness: will be done, Pops.

3:16 PM

shrexy: What ever happened to those kittens, Remus?

Octopussy: oh yeah. never updated anyone but Jan. they're all healthy again. all twenty six. Dice adopted one, it's name is Domino.

Octopussy: and we adopted five. Their names are Morticia, Elvira, Achilles, Patroclus, and Tootsie Pop.

shrexy: Who named the last one?

hazelnut: that would be me

Octopussy: Tootsie Pop is her cat. Morticia and Elvira are Jan's, Achilles and Patroclus are mine.

shrexy: So that's six. That still leaves twenty cats unaccounted for.

spipples: This would be where I come in and tell you I adopted ten of them, isn't it? Because I did I'm constantly swarmed with five month old kittens.

Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): He gave them all dumb names.

spipples: Sir, those are my furry children you're insulting.

Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): Ah yes, my fuzzy nieces and nephews with stupid names.

spipples: How dare you insult Toast, Meatball, Cheddar, Porkchop, Bagel, Bacon, Muffin, Twinkie, Tofu, and Tortilla.

shrexy: You really went with a food theme, huh?

spipples: To be fair, nobody stopped me.

shrexy: I'll be honest, the idea of naming a cat Bagel is hilarious.

spipples: To be fair, Bagel has no braincell so he's perfectly dumb and content in life.

waaahluigi: I also have three cats. Princess, Queen, and Duchess.

shrexy: So did the other seven get adopted?

Coffee Bandit: Yup, mine and Toby's. I have six, he has one. Remington, Remulus, Remy the Second, Rema, and Remingtina.

eatpavementido: Mine is named Pumpkin. I don't know what these guys are on.

8:45 PM

Momgan: Janus, Remus, I'm coming over for date night.

Coffee Bandit: Hold on, I'm omw.

Octopussy: It's poly cuddle pile time!

1:13 AM

hazelnut: So all of my parents are adorable.

hazelnut: polycuddlepile.jpg

hazelnut: I love my parents.

Papa Bear: They're so cute, kiddo! But you should get some sleep.

hazelnut: My function is Dreams I sleep during the day?

Papa Bear: Ah, carry on then, kiddo.

þiccness: Hi, I'm Nightmares.

shrexy: Wait, you kids have functions?

eatpavementido: more like fragments of a function.

satantakemehome: I'm Insomnia, Castor is Depression, Sirius is Insecurity, Halley is Courage, and Orion is Apathy.

wall-e: Me and Noah are the only figments that are also fragments. I act as Responsibility and Noah acts as Empathy.

shrexy: Huh. Never really thought about that but I guess I see it.

shrexy: shadowdemon.jpg

shrexy: angeltheshadowdemon.jpg

shrexy: virgilsnugglingme.jpg

shrexy: Help, I've been taken hostage as a cuddle victim.

eatpavementido: Perish.

9:58 AM

shrexy: virgilisstillhere.jpg

shrexy: Is it legal to move, fellas?

eatpavementido: I'll come help. Damn, my boyfriend's really choosing his human over his boyfriend.

shrexy: I promise I'm not stealing your man.

eatpavementido: Good, I'd punch you if you did.

shrexy: tobynowtrappedbyvirgil.jpg

shrexy: I'm free!

eatpavementido: I love being trapped by my boyfriend.

Thera-pissed: Don't worry, I get trapped by Roman a lot too.

waaahluigi: Hey!

Thera-pissed: Am I lying?

waaahluigi: No but you make it sound like I'm clingy.

Thera-pissed: Yes, but your clinginess is cute.

waaahluigi: Alright, you may continue.

eatpavementido: Ah yes, the triplets are stage 5 clingers. Gotta love it when all three idenntical idiots are touch starved.

SwEeTvErUcA: I will rip out your incisors.

waaahluigi: I will feed you your own teeth.

Octopussy: I will make you spit out your teeth one by one like a PEZ dispenser.

Dr. Bitch: Good to see the triplets getting along.

eatpavementido: You can't kill me! I have the power of my boyfriend and anime on my side!

Dr. Bitch: Did he just call Virgil god?

eatpavementido: Am I wrong? No.

Dr. Bitch: Alright, carry on.

9:14 AM

shrexy: Wow, y'all. Did anyone else realize you could make a chat-wide call?

shrexy has started a video call

shrexy has invited everyone to the video call

waaahluigi has accepted shrexy's invite

SnekBoi has declined shrexy's invite

Octopussy has declined shrexy's invite

Coffee Bandit has declined shrexy's invite

Momgan has accepted shrexy's invite

eatpavementido has accepted shrexy's invite

Papa Bear has accepted shexy's invite

Transcript

"Hey, guys!" - shrexy]

"Hey, Thomas." -eatpavementido

"Is Virgil asleep on you?" -shrexy

"Yes." - eatpavementido

"Aww. Guess we've gotta be quiet." - Papa Bear

"Nah. Legit, Pollux just busted in the room and yelled that Castor was chasing him and he's still sleeping." - eatpavementido

"Shit, shit, shit. He's up. I must have moved." - eatpavementido

"Toby, what the fuck? Are you recording me? I look like a mess. Quit it." - unknown

"It's a video call with the group chat." - eatpavementido

"Turn it off." - unknown

"It's okay, Virgil, you look cute." - Papa Bear

"Gimme that." - unknown

"Make me." - eatpavementido

"Alright." - unknown

eatpavementido has left the video call

shrexy has ended the video call

shrexy: RIP Toby.

Papa Bear: @spipples Kiddo, please don't kill your boyfriend?

spipples: Only a little bit?

Papa Bear: Not even a little bit.

spipples: Suck the fun out of life, why don't you?

eatpavementido: Don't make it sound like I wouldn't let him kill me if he chose.

waaahluigi: Live by the boyfriend. Die by the boyfriend.

eatpavementido: Precisely

shrexy: Anyone gonna make note of the fact that Janus, Remus, and Remy all declined the video call?

Momgan: They're busy. I figured at least one of us from our relationship should join so I actually went to a quieter bar in the imagination,

shrexy: Should I even ask what kind of busy?

Momgan: You can if you want.

shrexy: Though I feel like I'll regret this, what kind of busy?

Momgan: Janus is upstairs sleeping, Bela is practicing her crochet, Remus is grooming Boogeyman and Espresso, and Remy is taking care of his new piercing. I was planning out my week's schedule around theirs so I could visit.

shrexy: Sorry to interrupt you, bud.

Momgan: No, it's fine. I needed a break anyway.

waaahluigi: Was Deceit sleeping all day yesterday too?

Momgan: What are you implying?

waaahluigi: That he's avoiding me.

Momgan: Alright, you thickheaded, self-deluded bastard. I get that you two aren't getting along. I don't care, quite frankly. Hate each other's guts for all I care. You two having problems with one another isn't my problem. But Janus isn't avoiding you, he's finally receptive to the second part of his treatments and he's finally getting better.

SnekBoi: Logan, don't fight my fights.

Momgan: Sorry, sweetheart. I'm on my way back, I'll come up to you first and we can talk it over.

SnekBoi: It's okay.

SnekBoi: And you @waaahluigi, I'm sorry. Okay? I'm sorry that I lashed out at you and I'm sorry I compared you to Remus, it was wrong of me and you didn't deserve that.

waaahluigi: Oh look, everyone. After three months he finally apologizes!

SnekBoi: I haven't made effort to contact you in the last three months because I didn't contact anyone in the last three months other than Dice and a few nurses. I willingly gave my phone to hospital lock up so I could be just a little less stressed while going through the hardest parts of my treatment for the third time in six months and so that maybe, just maybe, I could get through the consolidation and I finally did it. So I'm sorry my apology to you is so late, oh great one, but I was a bit busy getting medically cleared with remission so I could finally go home.

waaahluigi: oh

SnekBoi: But, since I'm taking the moral high ground, you don't need to apologize and you don't need to feel bad about assuming things. I disappeared and I never talked it out with you because my admission was so sudden and the recommendation of detachment was a spur of the moment decision that only benefited me. I'm finally home and I actually was sleeping all of yesterday. I'm not about to get in fights right now because I'm too happy to be in my own bed again and getting to hold my own daughter and boyfriends again.

waaahluigi: I'm still sorry.

SnekBoi: Accepted.

spipples: Does this mean I have to stop being bitter about you two not getting along?

SnekBoi: No, but it would be appreciated.

spipples: Aight, bet. I'll forcefully make us three best friends.

shrexy: aren't all three of you mothers?

SnekBoi: Alright, this. I never really realized this. And, now that it's been brought to my attention, the first order of business is stealing you two, Bela, and your kids and going to the new tea place in Laurel for late Mother's day. I've been waiting to go since Sharon got herself fired from there and they have the best ginger and honey tea.

waaahluigi: Sharon?

SnekBoi: Yeah, she makes fun of me for being a teen mother every time I see her.

Octopussy: I've punched her once. didn't stop her.

waaahluigi:  I know, she did that to me too. I told her she shouldn't say rude things to someone who could and would unmake her.

spipples: Same here except she made fun of me the whole time I was pregnant with the triplets until I just straight up punched her.

shrexy: I guess being decked by a heavily pregnant 15 year old sets you off of making fun of them, huh?

spipples: Heavily pregnant 15 year old with the ability to conjure shadows.

shrexy: You scare me. Keep those shadows to yourself.

SnekBoi: I may need to wear a mask and book a table beforehand to make sure the room is private until I'm in the complete clear with the chemo still making my immune system absolute shit.

waaahluigi: Plus the fact that our kids make a solid soccer team so we'll need a bit of a biggger table.

SnekBoi: Yeah, that too.

spipples: Thanks for remembering my soccer team, guys.

SnekBoi: You're very welcome.

spipples: That was sarcastic.

SnekBoi: I know, I felt it.

spipples: You're insufferable, I love it.

12:45 PM

spipples: Hey, @SnekBoi, you guttertrash bitch, do you have a migraine yea or nay?

SnekBoi: Kind of. I'm working off one but I took my meds so it should be gone soon enough.

spipples: Noted, no doorbell or knocking.

SnekBoi: Wait, what??

spipples: Answer your fucking door then and find out.

SnekBoi: Gremlin.

1:05 PM

waaahluigi: So what'd he do?

SnekBoi: Brought over lunch for me since all my boyfriends are working and Bela is at school.

spipples: He cried.

SnekBoi: Shut up or I will end you.

Octopussy: Anything good?

spipples: Yes, I have the spare containers for you in the fridge when you come home and, yes, it's edible for you too if that's what you're asking.

Octopussy: ooooh, what is it?

spipples: spaghetti squash with tomato sauce, veggie curry, and ham and egg roll ups. There's also a few casseroles in disposable pans in the freezer that you can heat up in 45 minutes each.

Octopussy:  I love you.

SnekBoi: be real with him, V, you brought over like two weeks of casseroles. You're just lucky we have a really big freezer.

spipples: Yeah, a really big, empty freezer.

Octopussy: I was gonna go shopping literally in two days on Wednesday when I'm off.

SnekBoi: loaded cauliflower, zucchini au gratin, loaded brussels sprouts, rice cheese and zucchini, green bean, eggplant lasagna, chicken cordon bleu, chicken broccoli cheese, cabbage rolls, chicken & mushroom, tofu caprese, crack chicken, brown rice cheese and tomatoes, and chicken bacon thyme.

Octopussy: hey Virge

spipples: yeah?

Octopussy: love ya

spipples: Thank you. I'm also babysitting your boyfriend until someone comes home because this weak bastard bruised his wrist and almost fell over opening the front door.

SnekBoi: I'm not a baby but I won't make you leave because I'm tired and I don't want Boogey to have to get me things or help me around.

Octopussy: stubborn bastard. love you. thanks V.

spipples: No problem.

Taglist: @glaxyjellyfish @chronophobica @fear-ze-queer @imma-potatoo

[halfway-happyyy]

Hold You in My Arms

AN: This is short ‘n sweet and soppy as hell, and inspired by this lovely little ask that I got a little while ago. Hope you lovelies enjoy. TW: pregnant reader, mentions of pregnancy.

It is late into the evening when Alexander arrives home and you do not really tend to sleep well when he is gone, so you are already awake when the sound of him creeping his way up the stairs finds you from your cocoon of blankets. He hesitates outside of the bedroom door, deciding whether he is going to risk rousing you from your already troubled slumber. You hear the creek of the opening door a second later, see the sliver of yellow hallway light spill open through the crack and smile softly to yourself. Alexander pads over to your closet, loosening the tie from the collar of his white, starched shirt as he does so. You can tell from the sound of his gate that he’s indulged in a few cocktails this evening; this being his first public event since the pandemic took hold, you aren't at all surprised. He removes the clothing wordlessly from his body, draping them over the chair in there, and disappears into the on-suite bathroom. A second later, the tap begins running and you hear him spit into the sink a couple times. He emerges a few minutes later, the waft of mint toothpaste hangs heavy in the air behind him. He sidles down in the bed beside you, and relief washes over your very being like a tidal wave. Alexander reaches for your hand beneath the covers and grasps it tightly; he’s surprised when you grasp it right back.

“You’re awake?” He asks, sleepily.

“Yes.”

Alexander turns to nuzzle his face into the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent as he does so. “Mm, it’s good to be home kid.” Instinctively, his hands move to the curve of your burgeoning belly, where they caress the bump slowly growing there. “Hi baby,” He whispers.

It's the little things you'll miss the most when he's back on set.

He peppers gentle kisses around the hollow of your throat. "Is there anything I can get you?"

As if on queue, a ripple runs rigidly along the inside of your belly- featherlight, but definitely the product of a miniscule finger. “You know what I could go for right now?” you ask, and you can almost feel Alexander beam into the crook of your shoulder.

“What's that?”

You rub the roundness of your belly lovingly. "We would kill for a grilled cheese sandwich.”

Alexander lifts his head from your shoulder, expression amused. “You and our unborn child, hey?”

You nod sleepily. “With pitchforks and everything.”

Alexander lets a small puff of air escape his mouth in the shape of a low whistle. “I better get on it then, hey?”

You squeeze his hand gently. “I’ll come down and keep you company.”

Following him down the stairs to the darkened kitchen, you are in mild anticipation for the midnight snack you are about to recieve. Alexander is entirely too gifted a cook and can slap just about anything together, and have it be delicious. “How was your night?” You ask, stifling a yawn.

He sets a small frying pan atop the bottom right burner and heads to the fridge for the butter. “It was good to see everyone again,” He muses while the gas burner flickers to life. “I had forgotten how nice it felt to put on actual clothing and to just be in a completely different setting…” He cuts a large portion of butter from the block and drops it into the pan, the satisfying sizzle of it causes your mouth to water hungrily. “Quite a few people asked about you,” He murmurs as he slices two pieces of fresh, homemade sourdough bread. He sets the first piece into the pan of scorching butter and slices a few pieces of aged cheddar cheese, laying them on top of the crisping bread. He places the other piece of bread on top of the cheese and turns to you, a large smile in place on his face. “Not that I’m surprised in the slightest,”

“Surprised about what?”

Alexander shrugs. “That you were asked about multiple times this evening. You’re pretty fucking awesome.” It is never lost on you how loved he makes you feel; that someone could look at you the same way that he is looking at you now- that someone could love you enough to make you a grilled cheese sandwich at an ungodly hour of the evening, is still an insane notion. “Almost there, kid.” He announces a few moments later. You watch him in the golden light of the kitchen lamp, the way his hair is still done up and full of product from hours before. You notice the way the muscles in his back and shoulders ripple and flex as he flips the sandwich in the pan. His sweatpants, the ones he owns multiple pairs of and has only really worn them during quarantine, hang teasingly low on his hips. He reaches for the cupboard to his left and produces a plate, which he dumps the sandwich onto expertly. Next, he grabs the ketchup bottle from the fridge, squirts a large, squiggly heart next to the grilled cheese and places it gently on the placemat in front of you.

You peer down at the crispy, glistening masterpiece in front of you and rub a thumb over the back of Alexander's hand. "This smells amazing, thank you my love." It's quiet in the kitchen as you sink your teeth into your first bite of food. “I don’t think I’ve ever been more in love with you,” You throw a cheeky wink his way.

Alexander leans back in his chair, a small smile tugs at the edges of his lips as he shakes his head in mild disbelief. “Me neither, kid.” He cocks his head to the side, his face brimming now. “Quarantine has offered me so much time with you, and I feel like one of the luckiest men in the world.”

You roll your eyes playfully. “I’m not exactly sure why!”

Alexander gestures to the clock above the stove. “It’s nearly two o’clock in the morning on a Sunday morning and I’ve just made the love of my life, who happens to be growing our baby in her belly, a grilled cheese sandwich.” His eyes are wide and glassy, his expression slightly incredulous. “For the first time in my life, I can say honestly that there is no place I would rather be than right here.”

You swallow the last bite of food in your mouth, and curse for the millionth time during your pregnancy, the hormones that have wreaked havoc on your already fragile emotional state. “Alex, I-

“I mean, I have been with you every step of the way for this new journey. I haven’t missed a single doctor’s appointment, or phone call… this is living, kid. This is it.” And there is really nothing you can say at this point because Alexander has succeeded once again, in rendering you utterly speechless. He takes the empty plate from you and deposits it into the sink with a dull thud and then turns and heads into the living room. You follow him wordlessly, watching with a small smile as he turns on the record player in the corner of the room, next to the bay window. Ray LaMontagne’s beautiful voice suddenly comes to life above the muted scratch of the needle. “Dance with me?” He asks, quietly.

“Of course,”

He holds you close to him, his warm hand rests easily against the small of your back, but your bump presses against his stomach and he can’t help but glance down and laugh a little. “Hi baby,” He murmurs, and it causes goosebumps to rise in patterns across your body.

“You’re going to be such a wonderful papa,” You whisper into the warmth of Alexander’s bare chest.

Alexander kisses the top of your head; lets his lips linger close as he speaks. “I can’t wait to meet them…”

You sway like that for what feels like hours, not at all aware of when the record finished. “Thanks for staying up past our bedtime with us, Alex.”

He beams down at you, and your breath hitches in your throat as you watch the way his blue orbs glitter wildly. He tucks a stray strand of hair behind your ear, humming contentedly to himself. “Kid, I’d stay up past your bedtime with you a million times if it meant that I got to slow dance with the two of you,” He splays a warm palm against your belly. “A million times, just to feel even an ounce of this happiness.”

It is the little things that you will miss the most; and right now, you are all too content to live in this moment with him forever.

[elisaphoenix13]

Attack Of The...Fruit?

Stephen scrutinizes the apples in front of him while Valerie grabs the edge of the stand to peek at the abundance of fruit and vegetables while simultaneously sticking close to his leg. She was always easy to shop with since he didn't have to worry about her wandering off, and he loved seeing the curiosity fill her big blue eyes. Sometimes she helped pick out the produce, and other times she was content to just watch her mother do it himself. The rest of the kids, including Cassie, were wandering around the rest of the store to help grab what was on the list or to make a sad attempt at putting their choice junk food in the cart with their haul.

"...Mom?" William says softly from the other side of the stand.

"Hmm?" Stephen acknowledges as he grabs a couple of decent apples.

"Can we get more strawberries?" The teen asks carefully.

The fact that William was even asking for something made Stephen happy. It was a big step from what the twins were like when they first moved in, and Stephen and Tony had to take baby steps with them. They were a little forceful about things the twins needed, but things they wanted? They started taking Harley and Peter along on their shopping trips because those two always asked for at least one thing. The twins had seen that even if they were told no, it was said gently and Stephen sent them off to go put whatever it was back. It also helped that Peter had been in their shoes once upon a time. While he wasn't between foster homes or out on the streets, he still didn't like asking for things unless he needed them.

He even explained it to Thomas and William.

"Of course. Why don't you grab some whipped cream to go with it?" Stephen nods toward the back.

William lights up and walks off to retrieve a can of whipped cream after placing a container of strawberries into the basket. It was during this that Valerie gently tugged on Stephen's pant leg and pointed toward a shorter stand with mangoes piled on top of it. They must have been in season if they were on sale.

"Mama...fwuit?" The baby asks softly.

"Do you want to try one?" He asks and smiles when she nods. "Alright. Go ahead and grab one."

Valerie looks between him and the stand uncertainly and when he makes no movement, she walks the few feet over to the stand. She was always nervous to leave his side, but she was slowly starting to detach from it willingly. It always made Stephen want to gather her up in his arms and firmly reattach her to him, in the metaphorical (and somewhat literal) sense. She was his baby and he wasn't sure if he was ready for her to grow up yet.

He watches as his youngest daughter looks at the pile of mangoes with a calculating gaze, and then reaches up to grab one. She was very smart for her age and knew what fruit she could grab without sending the rest tumbling to the ground, and did just that before walking back to Stephen to hold it up to him. The sorcerer takes it with a smile and puts it in the cart, chuckling when she gently grips onto Athena's fur.

The wolf was so well behaved in public settings like this, that they were able to get away with making her a service animal. Tony had her licensed and even got her a vest for outings like this. And her being a service animal wasn't a total lie either. She helped with Valerie. If she were to ever get seperated from the family, Athena was to either find a safe place for her to wait for someone to find her, or she would follow a familiar scent to find a family or team member. It depended on the location and amount of people, and fortunately nothing had happened yet.

Athena was almost just as attached to Stephen as Valerie was. It made it easier for the baby to stay close when she wanted to walk since Stephen was a bit too tall for her to hold onto his belt loops.

"Good job." He praises and makes his way to the cereal aisle.

There was where William rejoined them with a can of whipped cream which he promptly put into the basket, and then Peter with his armful of list items. And of course the bag of Doritos he thought he cleverly hid. Stephen gave him a knowing look so that the teen was aware that he had noticed, but didn't say anything. Every once in a while he let the boys get away with a snack of their choosing. Today was one of those days.

A small gust of wind blows past the sorcerer and he huffs fondly. "Thomas, what have I told you about running indoors?"

"Sorry! But they have white cheddar Cheez-Its on sale!" The older twin says excitedly and Stephen rolls his eyes.

"As much as we appreciate that you're trying to save money, we don't notice when we save fifty cents. You can get those whether they're on sale or not." Stephen reminds him.

Thomas sighs. "I know. It's a habit."

"There's nothing wrong with that, but I don't want you to worry about money, okay?" Stephen assures the twins and Harley cackles as he joins them with Cassie and Diana.

"Yeah, Dad sneezes out money. Probably wipes--"

Stephen clears his throat, and while Harley didn't finish his sentence, he still grinned. He and the girls put their haul of groceries and chosen snacks in the cart, and after Stephen tells them all to choose a box of cereal, they take the cart up front and check out. Cassie was really only along to help and get herself some snacks since she had gone shopping with her parents earlier in the week. Once everything was bought, everyone grabbed some bags and walked outside where Stephen opened a portal in a secluded corner and they all went through.

Bags were placed on the counter and table, and Athena laid in her usual spot next to the counter after Peter helped take off her harness. While the kids put away the groceries, Valerie finds her mango and holds it up for Stephen. He takes it and washes it before asking Harley to cut it for her and places her in her highchair while they wait.

When there's a small jingling noise, the sorcerer looks down, expecting Tibbs to be at his feet waiting for treats...but he watched Flynn dash into the kitchen instead. He zooms around in his excitement, and then stops very briefly to show the black collar around his neck. Cassie makes a noise between a laugh and a sigh when the fox starts zooming around the floor again.

"Papa got him a collar this morning. Flynn's...very excited and proud about it." She explains as the celestial himself walks past the kitchen toward the living room with Scott.

"The little shit needed one. He goes everywhere with me when he can and one of these days he's going to get lost." Quill grumbles.

Flynn yips happily and runs after the god to climb up his leg and up to his shoulders, not even breaking Quill's stride to the living room. Stephen wasn't even surprised how well they were synced to each other, or in this case, how well Flynn was synced to Quill. The tiny bell on the collar with the fox's tags was probably for everyone's safety since Flynn was notorious for coming out of nowhere and tripping people up around Quill.

"Here you go, Val." Harley says as he places some pieces of mango on the tray in front of her.

"Tank you." She says softly before picking up a piece and eating it.

Stephen helped with the rest of the groceries and sent the other kids off with their snacks to do as they pleased. Only William sat at the table, which currently held the jigsaw puzzle he and the younger twin were slowly working on. It was supposed to be a picture of a Japanese garden when they finished but so far all they got finished was the border and the koi pond. It was a three thousand piece puzzle that would take them some time to complete since they hadn't sat down with it since the day they started it. They usually put a couple pieces together before moving on when they couldn't sit down, but it was their thing. A way to spend time together.

As Stephen puts together some cheese and crackers for Diana (as requested), he hears a whine of discomfort. He looks over at Valerie and William and finds the teen looking at the baby in shock and opening his mouth.

"Mom!" He finally says, and points to Valerie when he sees that Stephen is looking at him.

"What's wrong?" He asks in concern, rounding the counter to walk over and look at the baby.

William didn't need to answer. Stephen saw immediately what had worried the boy, and it sent a spike of panic through him very briefly. Valerie's face, neck, and arms were covered in red splotches that obviously itched if the baby scratching was indication. Stephen reaches out to pick her up, and looks at William as he points to the tray still holding a few pieces of mango.

"Wash and sanitize that thoroughly, please. Scott! Can you go get the Benadryl from the medicine cabinet?" Stephen calls out.

"Uh...sure." Was the thief's reply. He must have heard the urgency in the sorcerer's voice because it barely took him a minute to get the medicine to Stephen and see why it was needed. "Oh man. What was it?"

"Mangoes. She's never had them before." Stephen answers and takes the small cup once Scott measures out a small dose.

"She gonna be okay?" He asks.

"This seems to be her only reaction. She'll be uncomfortable for a little bit but she'll be fine."

Stephen helps Valerie drink the medicine, and she curls against him with a whine when she finishes. While Scott returns the medicine, the sorcerer gently rubs her back and hushes her gently in an attempt to soothe her. William had not only cleaned up the tray, but the rest of the chair as well, even if it was all overkill. As a distraction, Stephen sits at the table with her and works on the puzzle with William after asking Cassie to finish making Diana's snack, and it was about an hour later when Tony got home from half a day of meetings.

It didn't take him long to notice the baby's condition when he approached Stephen to give him a greeting kiss. "Povero topolina," he murmurs and kisses the top of her head.

"Mangoes." Stephen answers his husband's unanswered, forming question. "We'll have to monitor some of her food."

Tony nods. "Friday, add mangoes to the baby's allergy list please."

"Yes Boss."

They had lists for every kid in case of emergencies, sleepovers, for doctors, or however else they might need them. Mint was added to Peter's list when Tony came up with the idea, and now all they had to do was ask Friday to add to the lists when needed. She even scanned for the allergens when products were in full view. Sometimes things were overlooked. It definitely kept Peter from living in the bathroom a few times.

"She's falling asleep." Tony says quietly and Stephen nods as he places a piece of the puzzle correctly.

"I gave her Benadryl. It will help her sleep through the worst of it and treat the reaction."

"Want me to take her up to bed?"

"No. It's alright. Thank you." Stephen answers softly.

Tony nods. "Let me know if you change your mind."

Fortunately, Valerie was fine by the next afternoon after Stephen gave her a second dose before bed. The problem was that she didn't understand why she couldn't have the rest of her mango. She enjoyed it, but Stephen had told her no and it broke his heart to see her crestfallen expression when he explained that it made her sick. Valerie seemed to understand to an extent and was happy to eat some of William's strawberries as an alternative. She certainly enjoyed letting the boy spray a little bit of whipped cream in her mouth.

Strawberries and cream were something William only shared with Stephen and Valerie. And to the doctor's amusement, Harley. If Thomas, Peter, or Cassie tried to take some, William would grab the bowl and turn away with it with an impish smile.

"Berry!" Valerie demands, and Stephen watches as William turns away from the puzzle they were sitting down for again, and feeds the baby a small piece of strawberry.

Cassie had Diana, and now William had Valerie. Stephen wasn't complaining. At least not right now.

He might have an issue with it when it starts the separation process from Stephen.

[sassyduckqueen]

Miraculous: Rise of Anatis 32

Whoo! A new chapter! Hope you guys like it. Again, sorry about the slowness at the moment. I'm working pretty much full time hours and it's tiring been back at work so I haven't had much time for writing but fear not, I will be working on the next chapter soon. Hope you guys are ready for it. It's gonna be a good one.... I hope XD 

=====================================

Chapter Thirty-Two: Troublemaker

"Their new outfits were so cool!" Kim stated in Alya's latest interview on her blog. Marinette grinned as it had been her highest views, even blowing her interview with Lila out of the water and Kim was really complementary on their new suits. She was inclined to agree with him. The Aqua suits were so cool and in her eyes, Anatis looked really good. She let out a little sigh at the memory of seeing him in his suit. The best part is she got to spend a couple of hours with him, watching a movie. They had chosen Lion King. Of course, she had ended up falling asleep on him, only waking up when the movie had ended. To her surprise, he had also fallen asleep. Part of her didn't want to wake him up because he looked so peaceful and she was extremely comfortable been curled up next to him. She knew it couldn't last forever so she gently woke him up and ordered the sleepy hero to go home but not before she slipped downstairs and grabbed him a box of treats for him and Tikki. He had thanked for her and given her a kiss on the cheek before he left, leaving her practically a melted puddle. Naturally, Plagg had teased her about it but he shut up when she threatened to get him cheddar instead of Camembert. She jumped as her phone began to ring, pulling her out of her thoughts. She scrambled for it and gasped as she saw it was Penny who was ringing. She pressed the answer button and held it to her ear.

 "Hello?!" She gasped.

 "Hello, Marinette," Penny answered, sounding professional as always. "I was wondering if me and Jagged could ask a favor of your family,"

 "Oh? What kind of favor?" She asked, sitting up. "Does Jagged need new glasses?"

 "Oh, no... not yet but I'm sure he would love to commission you again," Penny stated. "No, we're looking to do a reality tv show to help Jagged's single hit number one and for some good press. I suggested we go onto a show called Fill My Shoes and Jagged insisted that he wanted to be a baker. Since your family runs the best bakery in Paris and you also designed his album cover, it would be a wise choice to film it in your family's bakery,"

 "Oh, wow," Marinette gasped, shocked. "I'd have to ask my parents so I can't be certain they'll agree but I can try,"

 "Of course, I understand," She replied back, causing Marinette to imagine her nodding. "If you want, I can drop by for a hour to talk them,"

 "That would be great, Penny," Marinette replied. "Can you make it after school? I have to get going back,"

 "Yes, I can. That actually works perfectly," Penny admitted, making Marinette smile. "Do you think 5pm will be ok?"

 "Yes, my parents close the bakery at 4.30pm on a Wednesday anyway," Marinette explained, getting a hum of approval from Penny. "I'll let them know right away,"

 "Of course," Penny replied. "I'll see you then,"

"Bye, Penny," Marinette replied, hanging up before grabbing her school bag and running downstairs into the bakery. Her mother had just finished serving the customer as she rushed in. "Mama!! Papa!!"

 "Yes, dear?" She asked, looking at her. Marinette launched into an explanation of the phone call she had just had with Penny. Her father joined them as she explained that Jagged himself had asked for their bakery to be the location of the reality show he was suppose to be on and how good this could work for the bakery. She explained that Penny would be dropping by at 5pm to ask them about it and when they showed hesitation, she practically begged them to do it. They agreed to talk it over with Penny, making her squeal with excitement before she dashed out of the shop and ran back to the school. As she ran through the courtyard, she didn't pay attention to where she was going which caused her to trip and let out a scream but instead of hitting the hard concrete, she landed against something soft and blue. She blinked and pulled back when she realized she must of have crashed straight into Luka's chest. She looked up at him as a huge blush came across her face.

 "Are you ok?" He asked with concern, making her blush even more.

 "Y-Yeah... sorry for crashing into you like that," She giggled, rubbing the back of her neck. She could practically feel Plagg roll his eyes. Luka, however, smiled as he held her stand straight.

 "It's ok, Mari," He smiled before tilting his head to the side a little. "Though your melody is louder then usual. Are you sure you're ok?"

 "Oh! I'm just really excited," She grinned, making him smile before she looked around. Seeing no one around, she leaned in close. "Can you keep a secret?"

 ".... uh...." Luka's eyes shot to the side as if he was thinking about something. "I think so,"

 "Ok but you have to swear not to tell anyone else!!" She gasped, barely able to continue her excitement.

 "Pinky swear?" He asked, holding up his little finger. She linked it with hers before leaning closer to him. She thought he froze for a second but brushed it off as she whispered into his ear.

 "My parents' bakery may be on the TV show, Fill My Shoes and Jagged Stone may be the special guest," She whispered, making his eyes widen in surprise before he looked at her.

 "For real?" He asked, keeping his voice hush. She grinned as she nodded in an excited manner. "Mari, that's so cool... ah but don't worry. I won't tell anyone,"

 "I know," She smiled sweetly, playing with her hands. "You're really trustworthy, Luka,"

 A light blush covered his cheeks as he shyly rubbed the back of his neck, making Marinette giggle. She couldn't help but think he looked really cute when he blushed but before she could say anything, the bell rang and made her jump, once again landing in against his chest. It was her turn to blush as he caught her and smiled softly at her.

 "We better head to class," He replied, getting a nod of her. She straightened up and to his surprise, she placed a gentle kiss on his cheek.

 "Thanks for catching me, Luka," She smiled before heading up the stairs to Ms Bustier's class but not before she gave him a wave. He smiled softly and waved back before heading in the direction of his own class, catching up with Aurora and Jean who were heading there too. Marinette let out a little sigh as she watched him walk off before turning on her heel and walked in back into the class. Her mind drifted back to her deal with Anatis, which had been something she hadn't thought about since Captain Hardrock. She had intended to tell Luka that she liked him but just like the day in the park, an akuma turned up. Captain Hardrock had hit home for Luka. She knew he took it personally when his family got turned into akumas but this one was so close to home for both him and Anatis. Once everything had been restored, it felt wrong to confess to him so she decided to wait but then she learnt about the guardian and they got a new hero friend. She thought Culpeo was amazing personally but the point was things got her distracted from talking to him. On top of that, she still liked Adrien a lot. She still sighed gently when she saw him smile and day dreamed off their life together but she also dreamt of what life would be like with Luka. Both seemed amazing in their own way but she was still head over heels for both boys. Of course, Luka had one thing over Adrien. She could actually talk to him. Whereas with Adrien, she could barely string a sentence together but she was getting better. Shaking her head, she decided to put her thoughts aside for now and head to class.

 (***)

 Marinette took a deep breathe as she looked outside the bakery windows. Lots of Jagged's fans were outside, holding up banners and screaming with pure joy as they knew their favorite musician was outside. She looked back as Penny talked with Alec and Bob Roth, who was demanding that the show better meet his demands. Her parents looked super nervous and honestly, she couldn't blame them. She was super nervous, knowing that most of her friends were going to be watching the show.

 "Ok, we are going live in 3, 2, 1," The camera man stated as Alec stood in front of the camera.

 "Welcome to Fill My Shoes!" Alec declared, throwing his arms up in the air before he pointed at the camera as the show of people cheer could be heard outside. "You're joining us live for a new episode and our guest today is Jagged Stone!!"

 Jagged practically jumped into the area next to Alec as he played air guitar.

 "Rock and Roll!!" He declared, grinning as he threw his hands into the horns symbol. "Yeah!!"

 "Filling the shoes of..." Alec shouted as Jagged stood next to him with his arms crossed. "A baker!!"

 "Yo, Rockers!" Jagged grinned as he got into the camera's view as Alec turned to Tom.

 "And a big thanks to Tom Dupain, for having us here in his bakery," He stated as he gestured over to him, causing Tom to come over as he laughed in a nervous manner. "The best in Paris, I might add,"

 "Uh... Hello..." He smiled as he waved at the camera. Sabine smiled at him before grabbing a tray of Croissants and walking over to the crew, Penny and Bob Roth as Jagged and Tom began to bake.

 "Excuse me, do you want some hot croissants?" She asked, holding them out as two of the crew packed up their things. Bob Roth grabbed one as he looked at the ratings and walked off without thanking her. Penny also walked off as Fang began to make a fuss. Sabine turned to Marinette as she stood next to her. "I'm not so sure it was a good idea to let them film the show here, Sweetie,"

 "Of course it was, Mama," She smiled, looking at her before she placed her arm around her shoulders and gestured to the shop. "Don't forget. Jagged asked specifically to come here. You realize how good this will be for the bakery and Dad's gonna be come an instant celebrity!!"

 "Well..." Sabine stated as she looked at her husband. "For a celebrity, he looks pretty nervous,"

 They both looked at him and saw him trying to teach Jagged to knee bread. Jagged, on the other hand, was doing karate chops on the dough. Marinette couldn't help but laugh a little as she watched him do that. Tom corrected him after he waved nervously towards the camera. Hearing the hiss of fang, Marinette looked over and saw Fang pulling on his leash. Penny was holding him and telling him to calm down but she looked really nervous and was clicking her pen repeatedly. Marinette walked over and smiled at her.

 "Are you ok, Miss Penny?" She asked, causing Penny to look at her.

 "Yes, yes," The woman muttered before placing her hand on her chest. "It's just this show was my idea and Jagged's putting all of his trust in me and I just hope that everything goes well today,"

 She bit her pen as she looked terrified of the idea of failure. 

 "I'm sure it will go great, Miss Penny," Marinette smiled as she looked back over to Alec. Her father was waving at the camera again.

 "So Jagged, how does it feel to fill the baker's shoes today?" Alec asked as Jagged smiled happily.

 "It's awesome! Check this editable guitar I made from scratch!! This is so rock and roll!!" Jagged declared, trying to play the bread guitar he made before he started to sing. "Flour, eggs and butter!!"

 Penny couldn't help but let out a small laugh at his song as Sabine walked over. 

 "So, Miss Penny, what's it like working with a star like Jagged?" She asked, causing Penny to look at her. "He seems so cool,"

 "Oh, yes. He's... wonderful," Penny smiled as she looked at him. Marinette felt her heart jump as she recognized the look of one of love. Her inner fan girl squealed as she imagined how cute Penny and Jagged would look like as a couple. However, Penny realized what she said and jolted back, going back to writing on her clip board. "Uh... I mean... yeah, he's awesome,"

 Marinette smiled knowingly before looking over at Jagged as he sang with her father. She couldn't help but giggle as they dragged Alec into it, causing him to look at the camera with pure confusion before her father waved to the camera again.

 "Yo, Marinette, my favorite little lady!!" Jagged called, getting her attention and causing the camera to focus on her. "Come over and rock out with us!"

 "Uh!" Marinette gasped as Sabine gave her an encouraging smile. She walked over in a nervous manner and waved the camera, not sure how deal with the sudden attention onto her. Jagged smiled and wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

 "It's so cool that we get to spend the day together. Marinette's practically my niece," He declared, grinning before he turned to Alec. "She's really talented too. She did the artwork to my latest album and she's only in high school!!"

 "Wow! That's impressive. A true family of artists," Alec stated before gesturing to her and her father. "A talented young designer and a gifted patisserie. By the way, what are you gonna bake for us today, Tom?"

 "Uh," Tom gasped, looking nervously to the camera. "How about some chocolate croissants? Could you grab a bag of flour please, dear?"

 "Sure, Papa," Marinette smiled, turning to reach for a bag as Jagged moved out of the way. However, she knocked a large paddle over, causing it to fall on the table. When she went to grab, she accidentally pushed it under a bag of flour but didn't notice as she lifted it to return to her place. Her action caused the bag of flour to fly up and land all over Jagged, making her gasp. "Uh oh,"

 Jagged blinked and looked at himself before he grinned and began to laugh.

 "Hey, look! I look like a ghost! Rocking boohoo!!" He laughed as Alec placed his arm around his shoulders.

 "Making pastries is obviously no piece of cake," He declared before smiling. "Stay tuned. We'll be back from this commercial break,"

 "Boo!!" Jagged declared, hugging Alec before they cut the cameras. Alec dusted himself down and walked over to Bob as Marinette turned to Jagged and Penny walked over.

 "Sorry, Jagged," She mumbled, looking down but he shook his head.

 "No sweat, Marinette," He smiled as Penny turned to her. 

 "Can you tell me where the bathroom is?" She asked. Marinette nodded and told her it was upstairs before she began to help her father clear up the bakery. Penny led Jagged upstairs and looked around for the bathroom but they accidentally went on staircase too high and pushed open the trap room that led to Marinette's bedroom. "Wait, this isn't the rest room,"

 "This must be Marinette's bedroom," Jagged muttered, looking around. It was very pink. "Cool. Hey, there's a sink,"

 Penny nodded and grab some tissue before she began to try and clean off the flour as Jagged looked around. Noticing some of her hat designs, he walked over, making Penny sigh and follow him. 

 "Hey, look," He smiled as Penny scrubbed his jacket. "Man, Marinette has some real talent,"

 She looked up at the designs and found herself agreeing. Marinette was truly gifted but once again, Jagged had moved away. She rolled her eyes and followed him again.

 "Hey, I know this guy," He laughed as he walked over to the poster of himself. "Rock on, Jagged,"

 "We've gotta hurry, Jagged," Penny stated as he turned to face Marinette's photo wall.

 "Yeah, yeah. Don't worry, Penny," He stated as he looked over at them. There were a few photos of Adrien Agreste but there were also a couple of photos of Marinette with Anatis and a fair number of her with Luka. Jagged blinked and smiled as he looked at them. In one photo, Marinette and Luka were pulling faces. In another, they were stood back to back while wearing pink hats. Another one showed them with the rest of kitty section. One was outside of the cinema. Another was the two of them laughing as they attempted to bake some sweet treat. Another photo showed Marinette, Adrien and Luka with Wang Cheng while another one showed the two of them on the set of Nino's horror film, Horrificator. Marinette was pretending to be scared while Luka was pretending to be the monster. She also had the pictures of Juleka's photo shoot on the wall and a few with her friends. 

 "And we're back on air with Jagged Stone filling the shoes of a baker," Alec's voice stated as Penny tried to get him clear. "Let's see how that rock star cleans up all that flour,"

 "Isn't that Nanarky's kid?" He asked Penny, who nodded. "There's more photos of him then of me. I think the baker's daughter has a little crush,"

 He winked at the camera.

 "Or maybe they're a couple? They'd make a good one. A talented designer and an upcoming musician," Jagged mumbled before smiling. "Teenage love is so sweet. Makes me want to write a song. Hey, what about-"

 The trapdoor burst open and a fanatic looking Marinette burst through, looking close to tears. 

 "What are you guys doing in here?!" She gasped, distressed. Penny turned to her and clicked her pen.

 "I'm sorry, Marinette," She gasped, frowning. The last thing she wanted was to upset the girl. "I couldn't find the rest room,"

 "Hey, Marinette, you want me to sign that poster of me?" Jagged asked.

 "No, I just need everyone to leave and you stop filming," She gasped, clearly embarrassed but no one made to move. She looked desperately at Penny. "Penny, please get them to leave,"

 "You heard the lady," Penny declared as she began to push Bob Roth out of Marinette's room. He looked at her with shock but then one of the camera men looked up at her and told them she cut them off their air. She picked up the wire and noticed everyone look at her. She wanted to say sorry but seeing Marinette close to tears made her shake her head. "We'll deal with that in a second. Let's leave Marinette's room first,"

 "Penny, we're suppose to be live!" Alec declared, glaring at her. "We're going back on air,"

 "No! Get out of my room first!" Marinette argued as Jagged sneezed.

 "Penny, was that flour organic?" He asked. "You know I'm allergic to the non organic flour,"

 "Penny! Give me that wire,"

 "Penny, get them out of my room... please!!"

 "Penny, we've got no picture!!"

 "Penny, do you have a tissue?!"

 "Penny!!" Everyone's voice blended into one, causing Penny to grip her head as the buzzing got to her.

 "Urh!! Stop!! That is enough!!" She shouted, making them look at her before she looked at Marinette. "Everyone back down stairs now!! Out!!!"

 She forced them downstairs and out of Marinette's room, leaving the girl relieved. 

 "Out! Out! Out!!"

 "Well, what do we do now?!" Bob Roth asked but she glared at him.

 "I'll meet you downstairs in five!" She stated but he went to argue. However, she shoved the list at him and growled. "In five!"

 She slammed the door close before sinking down as she tried to calm down. She was just so stressed and everyone was demanding everything from her. She didn't blame Marinette because Alec and his crew shouldn't have been filming in her room so she could understand why Marinette was so upset. That room was her sanctuary and Alec had invaded that but no thanks to Jagged, who shouldn't have been there either. She took another deep breathe as an akuma fluttered closer to her before it entered her pen.

 "Troublemaker, I am Hawkmoth. You've always the faithful one, taking care of other people and shoving their problems," Hawkmoth declared in her head. "Today, you are free of that burden. From now on, you shall be the creator of all their problems and all I ask in return is Anatis' and Lady Noir's miraculous. What do you say, Troublemaker?"

 "Sounds like a plan, Hawkmoth," She declared, standing up and clicking her pen. She was engulfed in purple smoke, transforming her into an akuma before it disappeared, revealing her new look. Her skin was literally white and she had heavy black eye make up. Her hair was now styled in a pink and white mohawk with black shaved areas around her head and ears. Her suit resembled a rock star from the 80s and was black, pink and white. She wore a dark pink jacket and had a skull and crossbones on her suit. She stepped through the door and clicked her pen again, making her solid. She picked up her list and looked at it. "So, what's on my to do list next?"

 She tore in half and smirked.

 "I know. Take care of Jagged," She laughed before throwing the pieces and clicking her pen. She became intangible once again and allowed herself to go through the ceiling.

 ~Meanwhile in Marinette's Room~

 "This is a disaster!! I'm gonna be a laughing stock at school! Through all of Paris!! On the internet!!" Marinette gasped as Plagg floated next to her. "Luka will never talk to me again!! This is a disaster!! A disaster!!"

 "Pretty sure, he will, dollface!!" Plagg grinned, finding the whole thing amusing. "Besides, it's not like you can change it. The whole thing was live and boy was it funny,"

 "Plagg! Not helping!!" She gasped, rocking to herself. "It's a disaster!!"

 "Huh?" Plagg mumbled, floating over to the TV as the show went live again. "Dollface, it seems the show has your streak of bad luck,"

 "This is a disaster- huh? What do you mean?!" Marinette gasped as she looked over. She got up as her dad angrily spoke to Bob Roth as her mother threatened him but then a bag of flour got dumped onto Jagged and Alec fell on him. Marinette frowned as she watched weird things happen in the bakery. Croissants went flying, doors were slamming. Jagged cried out for Penny as he thought a ghost was haunting them and then the shutters were closed as Bob Roth looked around terrified and asked if the bakery was build on an ancient cemetery. Marinette frowned as she watched things get worst before a strange looking woman appeared next to Jagged, making him jump away in fear and scream for Penny. Marinette gasped as the akuma declared that Penny wasn't around anymore and that she was Troublemaker. She showed that she could make herself intangible before declaring that she was gonna cause him nothing but problems. "Penny?"

 "Oh dear. Now that troublemaker is going to put all that sourdough to waste," Plagg sighed, making Marinette shake her head.

 "Then we better stop her," She declared, holding out her hand. "Plagg, claws out!!"

 A green light over took her, turning her into Lady Noir. She looked over at the film as Alec attempted get footage of Troublemaker but she cut the camera. She frowned before climbing out of the skylight, just as Anatis landed on the ground below. She watched as he tried to get into the bakery only for Troublemaker appear behind him. She grabbed him and threw him into the TV van but Lady Noir extended her baton, blocking Troublemaker's path. She turned intangible again but Anatis had already thrown his yoyo and landed on the balcony, allowing her to bring back her baton back to her.

 "Hey there, handsome," She grinned as he jumped down from the rail and walked over to her. "What brings you to the best bakery in town?"

 "Fancied some freshly baked bread and landed in a spot of trouble," He grinned. "Is Marinette safe?"

 "She's hiding in the bathroom but Troublemaker seems to have it in for Jagged," Lady Noir nodded. "Anyway, follow me,"

 She jumped down into her room and Anatis followed suit, looking at the pictures as they moved across the bed.

 "Uh... Annie?" She asked, making him look at her.

 "Sorry, still not use to seeing myself on film," He smiled, tapping the picture of him and Marinette together. Lady Noir rose an eyebrow. "Anyway, we'll take the grand tour later. Shall we-"

 He suddenly lifted the mattress as knitting needles were thrown at them before he dived at her but Troublemaker clicked her pen, causing him to fall through her. Lady Noir jumped down and helped him to his feet as Troublemaker disappeared and threw an umbrella at them. She knocked it back and Anatis threw his yoyo but it went through Troublemaker as she clicked her pen. She clicked it again and threw the chaste at them. A picture of Luka landed on the ground and Lady Noir gasped before grabbing at it. Anatis rose an eyebrow but was knocked back when he was hit by an otterman. He threw his yoyo but it went through Troublemaker again and got tangled with Lady Noir's baton, causing her to laugh as she sank through the ceiling. He looked around for her as she jumped through the floorboard and clicked her pen, reaching for his earrings. Lady Noir gasped and spit her baton into two. She tripped him up and slammed her baton into Troublemaker's hand, causing her pen to go flying and Anatis to land on the floor. Troublemaker gasped as she looked towards her pen, causing Anatis to realize where the akuma was.

 "Lady Noir! The Pen!!" He shouted as the three of them dived at it. They all caught it but Troublemaker grinned and clicked it.

 "Touch me if you dare," She declared before sinking through the floorboards again. Anatis growled.

 "Damn it. We can't touch her, even if we wanted to her,"

 "But her strength is also her weakness, Annie,"

 "Good point. If she wants to touch us, she has to be touchable as well," He smiled as the two of them stood up. He noticed they were still holding hands before he quickly let go. "Sorry,"

 "N-No worries," Lady Noir gasped, blushing before grinning. "Let's go cause some trouble,"

 The two of them ran downstairs into the living room before looking around. Anatis narrowed his eyes as he spun his yoyo like a shield.

 "Be careful," He declared. "Chances are she's somewhere in this room but if she wants to take our miraculous, she can't be untouchable,"

 "And if we grab her then we snag her pen," Lady Noir grinned as she looked around the living room. Anatis nodded and narrowed his eyes as the two of them around but Troublemaker suddenly appeared through the ceiling and shoved Anatis across the room before she grabbed Lady Noir's arms and twisted them around her back, pinning them there. She went to grab her ring as Anatis jumped back up and threw his yoyo around them both but she clicked her pen, causing his yoyo to trap Lady Noir. She clicked her pen again and kicked Lady Noir to the ground before she ran at Anatis. She jumped and clicked her pen, going through him before clicking it again as she jumped against the wall, throwing herself into him and pinning him down onto the floor. She held his arms above his head and grabbed his right earring, causing the other one to beep erratically as she grinned, holding up the earring.

 "You've already lost half the battle, bug boy," She stated, looking at him as his mask slowly began to disappear, along with parts of his suit. He struggled against her as she went to reach for the other one but before she could, Lady Noir freed herself and held out her hand. Hearing the beeping, she closed her eyes.

 "Cataclysm!!" She yelled before blindly charging at Troublemaker. She gasped and clicked her pen, causing herself to go intangible again. Lady Noir went straight through her and slammed into the window but Troublemaker growled at her as she sank through the floorboards. She had dropped Anatis' earring which bounced away from her. He scrambled up and grabbed it, putting it back on. His mask returned over his eyes and his suit reformed on his legs and arms. He let out a sigh of relief as Lady Noir rushed over to him with her eyes closed and cradling her charged up hand. He couldn't help but smile at her. "Annie, you good?"

 "Yeah, I'm good, kitten," He stated, making her open her eyes. She smiled sheepishly at him before she grabbed his yoyo and handed it back to him. "Thanks for closing your eyes, Kitty,"

 "Well... I only want a reveal when we both agree to it," She smiled bashfully, getting a nod of agreement of him. "But that can wait. First, we need to kick trouble's butt,"

 "Couldn't agree more," He declared before throwing his yoyo up in the air. "Lucky charm!!"

 The magic ladybugs summoned a broken plate, which he caught as he frowned before he looked around in his lucky vision. He gasped as he couldn't find how to use it before he looked around again. Lady Noir frowned as Anatis got frustrated before he sighed.

 "That's strange... I can't see how to use it,"

 "Could losing an earring made your power weaker?" Lady Noir asked as he looked around again, moving over to the bookcase.

 "I hope not," He stated, glancing around before the super glue lit up. "Oh, thank kwamis. It is working,"

 "Oh, good," Lady Noir let out a sigh as he picked up the superglue. He began to fix the plate as she rose an eyebrow. "I mean that had me worried... but... why?"

 She pointed to the plate but before grinned and handed it to her before turning the glue on himself. Well, on his earrings. Lady Noir smirked as he took the plate from her and then the two of them headed back into Marinette's room. Lady Noir went first and held out her hand as she looked around. Anatis followed holding up the plate.

 "This is the lamest lucky charm I've ever had," He muttered in a worried tone. "It's practically useless against a villain who can literally walk through walls,"

 "She doesn't seem to be here though," Lady Noir replied before jumping up onto the bed area. "I'll check the balcony,"

 "Noir! Don't! I only have a plate to defend myself!!" He gasped as she disappeared through the skylight. "Great,"

 Almost instantly, Troublemaker appeared through the ceiling and dived at him. He dove out of the way and threw the plate at her but she clicked her pen and it went through her, smashing against the wall. She dived at him and pinned him down again, grabbing at his earrings as Hawkmoth ordered her to grab them. As soon as she touched them, her fingers got stuck onto them and he dropped the act, grabbing her arms as she tried to get up. He grinned at her as she tried to pull away.

 "Having some trouble?" He asked.

 "Aww, my poor bug-a-boo... looks like you have a super villain stuck on you... literally," Lady Noir cooed as she sat on the railing and held up the super glue. "Let's separate you two,"

 She jumped down as Troublemaker tried to get away from Anatis but he only moved with her, keeping his grip on her arms. Lady Noir jumped over and tapped the pen with her charged hand, causing it to rust and break, freeing both the akuma and Anatis. Troublemaker cried out and grabbed her head as she turned back into Penny. Anatis captured it with his yoyo before releasing the purified butterfly. He grabbed the broken plate and threw it into the air, declaring the magic words. It turned into the swarm and swept across the bakery, fixing everything that needed to be fixed and restored Marinette's room. As soon as that was done, Lady Noir turned her attention Penny as the woman looked around confused. Seeing the two heroes, she gasped.

 "W-what happened?" She asked in a frightened tone. "Is Jagged ok?"

 "You're always so helpful, putting everyone before yourself," Lady Noir smiled gently as Anatis nodded. She knelt down and smiled at her. "Let's worry about Penny for a change. Are you ok?"

 "I... I'm fine... thank you, Lady Noir," Penny smiled, getting up. "I'm sorry for causing trouble,"

 "Don't be, Penny," Anatis smiled. "It's ok to take some time for yourself when you need it,"

 "Thank you," She smiled as the miraculous beeped, reminding the heroes it was time to leave.

 "Sorry, have to go," Anatis gasped. "Rock on, Penny. You're awesome,"

 "Yeah! Rock and roll," Lady Noir agreed as the two of them jumped onto the rails and through the skylight. They hear Penny take a deep breathe before she exited the room. Anatis jumped onto the rail as Lady Noir landed next to him. "That was a close call,"

 "Yeah but no finding out my true identity for you today," He smiled as he spun his yoyo.

 "That's ok," She grinned, causing him to raise an eyebrow. "Since I already know who you are,"

 "Y-you do?!" He gasped as she snored and laughed.

 "You're my best friend, you dork," She grinned, hugging him. He smiled and hugged back before she pulled away and held out her fist. "Pound it?"

 "Pound it," He smiled, tapping his fist against hers. He went to jump before he turned and smiled at her. "You're my best friend too, Kitten,"

 With that, he jumped off through the city. Lady Noir jumped up the other part of the room before dropping down to part of her roof and dropped her transformation. She jumped back onto the balcony and let out a sigh of relief. Anatis hadn't found her supply of cheese nor did he seem embarrassed about Marinette having photos of him on her wall. She would have to deal with the rest of the fallout at school. She dived into her room as Plagg dived into his cheese and rushed downstairs. As soon as she burst into the bakery, she saw everything was back to normal. She rushed over to her parents and hugged them, telling them she hid in the bathroom before Penny shyly came through. She looked like she was about to apologize but before she could, Jagged glomped her.

 "Penny!! I'm so glad you're ok and not in your super villain outfit anymore... though very rock and roll... but seriously, what would I do without you?" He smiled as he held her shoulders. "You're the best. In fact, I'm giving you a pay raise for all your hard work!!"

 "Jagged," She smiled before hugging him. He smiled and hugged back. Marinette shared a knowing look with her mother before smiling.

 ~Next Day at School~

 Marinette sighed to herself as she carefully made her way through the school. She intended to avoid everyone but in particular, she wanted to avoid Luka. Well, she didn't actually want to avoid him but she figured he would probably been uncomfortable with the fact that she had their photos printed out and stuck on her wall. And that there was the fact that Jagged hinted that she might have a crush on him, which was true but she didn't want him to find out like that. She wanted to be able to tell him herself but so far, she hadn't seen him which was good. She would wait a few days and then talk to him again. She let out a sigh as she reached her locker and put her bag inside before closing the door.

 "Hey, Ma-Ma-Marinette," Luka smirked, making her jump. He let out a little chuckle as she glared at him before he rubbed the back of his neck. "Sorry... I just wanted to make sure you were ok after that akuma,"

 "O-Oh... I'm fine...a bit... never-mind... I'm good... are you?" She gasped, nervously before pressing her fingers together. "Look... about what you saw on the show last night... the totographs on my wall... I have them on there because they're really good memories for me... I'm sorry if that seems... weird..."

 "Marinette, I don't think that's weird at all but in case, you've forgotten... I'm a Couffaine. Weirdness and chaos is in my blood," He grinned, making her smile "So... I actually wanted to ask you something... um... I was wondering if you wanted to come by the liberty and hang out with me after school while I practice some new songs I've written... um I really could do with a second opinion on them who isn't Rose or Juleka and well, you like my music so... I was hoping... you'd like to come by?"

 "Oh," Marinette gasped, not expecting him to ask but she hesitated to answer. Not because she didn't want to say yes. She so wanted to say yes. She was just surprised that he asked.

 "Oh, you're busy..." He frowned, shaking his head. "Just ignore that. It was a stupid idea..."

 He sighed and went to walk away but Marinette grabbed his hand, making him look at her She blushed and pushed a bit of her hair back.

 "I'm not busy and I'd love to hear your new songs," She smiled shyly, making him smile.

 "Really?" He asked, smiling. She nodded. "Cool. Meet me at the doors after school?"

 "I'll have to drop of my books at mine first though,"

 "Fine by me. I can buy us some sweets,"

 "It's a date," She smiled, causing him to blush. "I mean... a hang out... thing...not like a date date..."

 "Ye-Yeah," He gasped, blushing before he rushed off. He stopped and waved. "See ya after school, Mari,"

===========================

Next Chapter: https://ultra-sassyduck.tumblr.com/post/632366839231578112/miraculous-rise-of-anatis-33

[brasskier]

Chapter 3 of my modern AU holiday fic series is up, and this one is the much-anticipated Jewish!Ciri chapter.

Hanukkah 2018, or The One Where Jaskier Conquers Judaism (A Year in Review):  When Jaskier discovers Ciri's birth mother is Jewish, he's determined to help her keep in touch with her heritage. He tries - and oftentimes fails - throughout the year to provide her this connection. Maybe he'll finally get it right for Hanukkah.

Find it on my ao3, or keep reading below the cut:

It all began with an offhand comment from Geralt not long before the new year. It was burger night, one of the few nights Geralt was actually around to cook. Most evenings Yennefer prepared dinner, or else they were left with one of the handful of dishes Jaskier could reliably not burn. And when he called into the living room for everyone's cheese preference - cheddar for Jaskier, pepper jack for Yen - Ciri had asked for a slice of American on hers. And Geralt had huffed a laugh, bemusedly muttered,

"That's not kosher." And for whatever reason, the statement attracted Jaskier like a moth to light. Before Geralt knew what was happening he'd flitted into the kitchen, pressed his elbows on the island counter and leaned forward.

"What's not kosher?" It sounded like an innocent enough question, but the shit-eating smirk on Jaskier's face said otherwise.

"Cheeseburgers," Geralt shrugged, returning his attention to the stove. Jaskier raised an eyebrow, dropped his chin into his hands. "Her mother was Jewish. Clearly not that Jewish, though." 

"Huh." And that was the end of the conversation, except the wheels were already spinning in Jaskier's head. He knew very little about Judaism, but he did know it was matrilineal, making Ciri, by birth, a Jew. And, just like that, Jaskier had found his new year's resolution. 

Jaskier was by no means a religious man. He loved his Hallmark holiday Christmas, but that was about the extent of it. He was certainly not a Jew. But how hard could it be, he figured. If he found a way to celebrate Christmas and Easter without really knowing what he was doing, he could surely find a way to give Ciri a slice of her heritage. 

Shabbat seemed like a reasonable place to start. Light some candles on Friday night, take a much-needed break from tech, have some challah. Except, Jaskier was no ordinary parent; he was going to go above and beyond for his lion cub and bake his own challah. 

This was mistake number one. 

The challah caught fire in the oven. He only had a split second to react before that godforsaken fire alarm went blaring, sending Yennefer trudging down the stairs to inspect the situation. Thank god Ciri's school let out later than the high school. He yanked the charred bread from the oven, sustaining a neat little burn on the inside of his wrist that he'd have to find an excuse to explain away later. 

"I'm going to try again," he declared, more to himself than anyone else, his wrist held under the running faucet. Yennefer shook her head, busying herself rummaging through their first-aid kit. 

"You're no cook, Jask." She turned the faucet, dabbed carefully at his arm with a paper towel. "Just go to the store and buy one. Ciri won't know the difference." His face fell, and he rubbed at his jaw with his free hand.

"But I will." She spread a glop of antibiotic ointment over the wound, trying her best not to scratch him with vampire-red nails. 

"You better not burn the house down," was all she had left to add, smoothing the band-aid over his skin.

The second challah (mistake number two), thankfully, did not catch fire. It did, however, refuse to rise, remaining a goopy mess in the bottom of the pan. Yennefer shuffled back through the kitchen again, presumably just to tease him further. A quick glance at the clock informed him he had just enough time for a third try before Ciri came careening in from the bus. Yennefer not-so-subtly recommended he go to the store yet again.

The third challah (mistake number three) did not catch fire. It didn't refuse to rise, either. Instead, it simply exploded, sending half-baked shards of bread splattering all over the interior of their oven. Geralt was going to kill him. Hell, he still didn't have a challah to show for his labors, and Ciri was going to kill him. With a beleaguered sigh, he shuffled on his coat, yanked his keys from their hook in the foyer, and called up to Yennefer that he was running to the store. 

After nearly wrecking his car in a race against the school bus and almost cracking his head open on the counter in a dash to make it to the kitchen, Jaskier finally had a beautiful, golden-brown challah waiting on the table. Well, actually, two challahs. He wasn't sure if he should get the regular one or the kind with raisins and, not wanting to mess up any more than he already had, he bought both just to be safe. 

He wasn't sure the hug Ciri flung herself into when she caught sight of the rolls waiting for her was well-deserved, but he found his voice wavering with the threat of tears anyway as he stumbled through the blessings over the candles. On the bright side, Kiddush was a fantastic excuse for a glass of wine. With a joyful b'tayavon, they tore into the challah. Yen was right; Ciri didn't know the difference.

Purim was early in 2018, on the first of March. This was, admittedly, something he knew very little about. But he did know that there were services for Purim, so he perused Google until he found a nearby synagogue that welcomed non-members. Perhaps it would've been better advised to reach out ahead of time, but Jaskier was never really one to plan in advance. 

This was mistake number four. 

He dug out one of the suits he reserved for parent-teacher conferences, enlisted Yennefer's help in wrestling Ciri into a sparkly yellow dress with more ties and zippers than Jaskier knew what to do with (mistake number five), and loaded her into the car before heading off. The first thing he noticed upon crossing the threshold was the costumes. A Batman sprinted past him, followed by an Optimus Prime, while a Princess Anna shouted after them. He glanced from the costumed children, down to his dolled up lion cub, and then back up. Fuck. A sympathetic father wriggled away from his wife and approached him, sticking out a hand for Jaskier to shake.

"You're new, aren't you?" He asked, and Jaskier nodded slowly.

"She, uh… her mom's Jewish," he muttered, tilting his head towards Ciri. She beamed up at the man.

"Papa is learning how to be Jewish for me because Momma celebrates Diwali and Daddy doesn't like holidays," she declared, and Jaskier tightened his grip on her hand. He was humiliated enough as it was; the last thing he needed was to explain his unusual family arrangement to a total stranger. The man quirked an eyebrow at her before returning his attention to Jaskier.

"She's a charmer, isn't she?" He laughed before gesturing towards a redheaded little girl around Ciri's age in a Wonder Woman costume. "That's my little girl, Eliana." Jaskier breathed a sigh of relief.

"This is Ciri." She waved up at them with her free hand. "And I'm Jaskier." 

"David." Jaskier shook his hand again, not really certain whether he'd already done so. "Well, I think it's awfully sweet that you're trying to learn for her. But for future reference, the kids usually wear costumes." Jaskier wanted to ask whether that applied strictly to Purim or services in general, but didn't care to embarrass himself further.

The service itself was not terribly long, which was a blessing, because it was entirely in Hebrew. Ciri, for what it's worth, seemed more entertained than him, enraptured by the opportunity to make as much noise as possible at the antagonist, Haman's, name. On the bright side, they got plenty of hamantaschen afterwards, and Jaskier was very grateful that he hadn't had the thought to try to bake them on his own.

Jaskier didn't know much about Jewish holidays, but he did know that Passover was pretty important, and that it was his opportunity to really test his mettle. It was perfect; he loved to entertain, and what was a Seder but one big dinner party. Valdo Marx, his distressingly put-together PTA arch-nemesis/band director of his biggest rival high school, had extended him an invitation to his massive yearly Seder, because "it's tradition to invite literally anyone ." Jaskier refused. 

This was mistake number six. 

The occasion started to unravel when he found out his parents couldn't make it, but he pressed on anyway (mistake number seven). He decided to cook for the occasion (mistakes number eight through twelve), but the matzo balls came out soggy and underdone, he cut himself slicing apples for charoset, the brisket ended up overcooked and rubbery, his potato kugel was a bland, tasteless mess, and he even managed to mess up hard-boiled eggs. No matter, he could surely just go to the store. But then Yennefer texted that she'd gotten caught up in City Hall and wouldn't make it back in time, and Geralt had work that night, and two did not a Seder make.

Jaskier tucked his tail between his legs and texted Valdo to belatedly take up his invitation. Along the way he ran in for a bottle of Manischewitz (mistake number thirteen). At least he'd checked the internet to make sure Ciri didn't need to be in costume for this holiday. Valdo leered at the bottle of wine he shoved into his hands as he shuffled through the door with Ciri in tow. Go figure, on the table sat an array of much more expensive (and tasty) wines. 

When it came time to recite the Ma Nishtana , Valdo scanned the room before his gaze settled on Jaskier and Ciri tucked away in the corner.

"Cirilla," he asked, "how old are you?" 

"Seven!" She provided eagerly, and Jaskier decided he needed to have a conversation with her when they got home about how it's sometimes okay to lie, actually. 

"That makes you the youngest child," Valdo continued. "Go for it." Ciri, very clearly, wasn't all too sure what exactly she was supposed to be going for, and Jaskier's heart sank. "The four questions?" Valdo elaborated, as if that would be of any help. At her continued and increasingly distressed silence, Valdo set his sights on Jaskier. "Tell me you didn't forget to teach her the four questions." (Mistake number fourteen.) Jaskier shrunk back in his seat, guilt drawn across his face. He leaned to the side and whispered into Ciri's ear.

"I'll do it with you, okay?" She rubbed at the tears forming in her eyes with a small fist.

"You're not a kid," she argued back.

"Your Dad begs to differ," he laughed, tracing the transliterated text with his finger. "Come on. Let's do it together." She nodded meekly, and let her voice fall under his as they stiltedly recited the four questions.

Valdo was onto him and his abject failure as a parent, and if he hadn't been already, Jaskier was sure of it when Valdo interrupted himself just towards the end of the Seder and gestured to him.

"My dearest Jaskier here is an esteemed colleague of mine." His words dripped with sarcasm, and Jaskier felt very small. "A fellow music educator." He raised his glass as if making a toast. "Jaskier, why don't you treat us to that impeccable voice of yours and lead us in Dayenu?" He tried to escape, he really did.

"My concentration was in trombone, you know. Not choir, like our marvelous host." Oh, but Valdo insists he has a beautiful voice (which he does , thank you very much.) "I haven't gotten to warm up." No matter, Valdo assures him. Take your time. "I think I might be coming down with something." Well then he should be in bed, shouldn't he, the poor dear, Valdo interjects. Finally, Valdo's uncanny ability to shoot down every last excuse outpaces his capacity to wrack his brain for them. Thank god for the musical notation printed with both Hebrew and transliteration, and thank god for years of sight-reading practice. He hobbles his way through it, and Ciri buries her head in his side. 

The Seder is not a total bust. For one, if someone had told Jaskier a minimum of four glasses of wine were in order, he would've converted a long time ago. Second, Valdo is actually a good cook ( damn him ), and his matzo balls are round and fluffy. Third, Ciri found the afikomen and all of Jaskier's transgressions were swiftly forgotten. She was asleep in her car seat before he'd even pulled out of Valdo's driveway. He decides to write the evening off as a wash and vows to do better next year.

Rosh Hashanah is the next holiday to roll around that he thinks is significant enough to bother with. And it's simple enough, right? Some challah, apples and honey, a few blessings? He can surely do that. Hell, how could he mess it up? 

He entirely writes off the prospect of baking his own challah and picks up one of those beautiful, braided loaves the day before. Unfortunately, no one at the kosher bakery thought to warn him that Rosh Hashanah challah should be round, so he has to run back to the store and get another one the next morning (mistake number fifteen). 

He cuts himself slicing the apples. Again. (Mistake number sixteen.) Perhaps, Geralt warns him, his knife privileges should be revoked. Except, this time, the cut won't stop bleeding. Spending Rosh Hashanah in the ER with Yennefer mercilessly teasing him the whole way through had not been part of his plans. Six stitches later, Yen swings by the grocery store and picks up a pack of pre-sliced apples on their way home while Jaskier slips in and out of sleep in the passenger's seat, and prays Geralt hasn't put Ciri to bed yet.

Ciri is wide awake when he sheepishly steps through the front door, curled up with Geralt on the couch and already in her pajamas. He leans over the two, plants a kiss on each of their foreheads. 

"Sorry, princess," he muttered, slumping onto the couch next to her. She smiled, wriggled free from Geralt's arm and pressed against his chest. "So much for Rosh Hashanah."

"It's okay." She tugged at his hand. "Can I see it?" She asked, gesturing towards the bulky bandage wrapped around his left hand. He held it out for her to inspect while Geralt reminded her to be gentle. "Did it hurt?" He couldn't help but laugh.

"It did. Which is why we don't let you use the big knife." And why Jaskier also probably shouldn't be allowed to use it either. 

"Who said Rosh Hashanah had to be cancelled?" Yennefer emerged from the kitchen with a plate full of sliced apples, round challah, and honey, shifting onto the couch next to Geralt. Ciri leapt up, elbowing both Geralt and Jaskier in the process, and devoured the plate eagerly. Maybe it wasn't entirely a bust, after all. Just no more apple slicing moving forward.

Yom Kippur is a big deal. Like, a really big deal, and very serious. Jaskier knows it's not exactly the holiday Ciri is looking forward to, but he has to prove he's serious. It's very important. So, he decides they're going to services.

This was mistake number seventeen.

Step one is waking up at the crack of dawn, dragging himself out of bed, and making an entire pot of coffee before he remembers he's supposed to be fasting (mistake number eighteen) and can't actually drink it. Step two requires digging the suit up again and stopping Yen on her way out the door so she can fix his tie. Step three is to rouse Ciri, singlehandedly deal with the inevitable meltdown that accompanies waking an eight-year-old early on a day off from school (mistake number nineteen), and enviously watch her devour breakfast before the inevitable battle of getting her into a dress. 

The service is long . It is boring. It is entirely in Hebrew. And it is certainly not designed with hyperactive elementary schoolers (or their starving, restless parents) in mind. After the third time he thinks it's finally ending, only for the Rabbi to launch back into prayer again, Ciri starts to get especially antsy.

"I need to use the potty," she tells him urgently in that whisper-shout that is a trademark of youth. Fine, he can handle that. He shimmies her through rows of enraptured attendees, waits like a sentinel outside the door to the women's room, and then tiptoes back in. 

"Papa, I'm hungry." Not exactly something to announce to a room full of people who can't eat, but so be it. Another hushed escape, a quick munch on the Goldfish he'd been smart enough to pack, and then their cautious reentry. 

"Papa, I'm bored." There's not exactly much he can do about that, so he shuffled his phone out of his pocket as discretely as possible, makes absolutely certain the volume is off, and passes it off to her. Unfortunately, this is only a temporary solution, and she's squirming in her seat before long. "Papaaa, I'm reeeally bored." 

"Just a little longer, lion cub," he assures her. He should've fled while he still had the chance to do so with dignity and grace, but he's sure it must nearly be done, and they can brave it out (mistake number twenty). This is, apparently, the very worst decision he could make. It is not, in fact, nearly done.

"Papaaa!" She's getting increasingly louder, wriggling around with increasing intensity. That heart-melting, will-bending pout of hers is drawn on her lips. This is decidedly not good. "I wanna go home!" That one was loud enough to turn a few heads, which means it's definitely time to go.

"Okay, okay," he attempts to placate her, "we're going now." But it's too late. The tears are coming. 

"Now!" That one's nearly enough to grind the whole service to a halt. He does the only thing he can think to do: tuck her under his arm, scurry through the aisle, and run. 

He feels dizzy and especially winded by the time they reach the car, and he's not exactly sure why. All he knows is that Ciri needs to please stop crying for a moment so he can catch his breath. It must be a Yom Kippur miracle (do those exist?) when she relents, jerking a hand free and placing it against his cheek.

"Are you okay?" Her voice is so tiny he nearly doesn't hear it.

"I'm fine, kiddo, just gimme a sec." He leans heavily back against the car, Ciri still clung around his chest. The dizziness passes just as quickly as it came on, and he hurries home eagerly, relieved when Ciri dozes in the back seat. 

They cozy up on the couch while Geralt mows the lawn outside, and spend the rest of their day off watching a movie - Ciri's choice, which is Moana, no surprise. He's sick to death of the movie but he sings along with every last song anyway. Damn that Lin-Manuel Miranda can write a catchy tune. 

Jaskier has all but forgotten about the earlier dizzy spell when the front door clicks open and a very sweaty Geralt parades inside, Yennefer, fresh home from work, on his heel. Which is why he really doesn't understand what's happening when he rises to greet them and the whole room tilts with him. He wavers, eyes squeezed shut and hand pressed against his face in a desperate attempt to will his head to stop spinning. It's no use, and before he can even go to sit back down he's careening forwards. 

His eyes fluttered open to a sharp prick on his hand, a high-pitched beep, and a total stranger hovering over him. He startled, fighting to prop himself up in a sitting position, but a firm hand he recognized could only be Geralt's forced him back to the ground. 

"The fuck's going on?" He managed to ask, and his own voice sounded oddly far away. He scanned the room for clues as to what could possibly be happening and settled on Yennefer's face just as she shot him a glare that he knew translated to watch your language. 

"You passed out, Jask." Geralt, somewhere overhead and out of view. "Hit your head good on the coffee table." Well, that would explain the pounding headache.

"And he is…?" He gestured vaguely at the stranger only visible in his peripheral.

"An EMT, sir," the man supplied, shifting back into view and shining a flashlight in his eyes. 

"Ah." He blinked reflexively, wincing at the fingers that firmly held his eye open. "You didn't have to call an ambulance, you know." 

"I didn't." Of course Geralt didn't, the man would probably gladly perform an appendectomy in the back of the bar at which he worked. It had to be Yennefer.

"Wasn't me." He considered for a moment if she could read his mind or if he was accidentally saying everything aloud before shakily remembering that he had a betrayingly expressive face. Well, if it wasn't Geralt, and it wasn't Yennefer…

"They taught us at school to call 911 if there's ever an emergency," Ciri casually explained. He couldn't help but smile. His little lion cub looking out for him, it made him feel warm.

"Alright," the paramedic commandeered his attention, helping shift him upright and propping him against the couch. "You're not diabetic, correct?" He nodded, which was a mistake, because silver stars erupted in his vision. "Your blood pressure is a little on the low side and you're pretty hypoglycemic. When did you last eat?" Oh, yeah. Fuck .

"Last night? It's Yom Kippur, I'm fasting…" He felt thoroughly, indescribably humiliated. He tries to be a good dad/surrogate Jew, and this is what he gets. As they say, no good deed goes unpunished.

"Happy new year," the EMT offered earnestly. A bottle was pressed into his hand, and he shakily raised it to his lips and drank without even questioning it. Whatever it was, it was incredibly sweet. "Some fast-acting carbs and a good meal should sort that out, but I'd still recommend you go in, just to rule out a concussion." He sipped some more on the mystery beverage and was fully prepared to politely decline when he felt small arms wrap around his shoulder.

"Fine." The second Jewish holiday in a row spent in the ER, just what he wanted . He was going to start racking up frequent flier miles if he kept it up. And all three of them accompanied him, evidence enough that he'd clearly rattled them. At least the doctor was sympathetic, suggesting he eat a bigger meal later at night next year. (Which was giving Jaskier a lot of credit, assuming there would be a next time.) He typed out sub plans on his phone while he waited for the discharge paperwork, knowing full well he wasn't making it to work the next morning. On the bright side, he didn't have a concussion after all.

Hanukkah was his chance to finally get it right. It was Jewish Christmas, right? And he'd always been pretty good at Christmas, so surely he'd nail this one. He dug around a few shops until he found a menorah he was fond of - cast in gold and decorated with music notes and a big treble clef - and proudly set it on the kitchen counter. He even bothered to watch a few YouTube videos of the blessings over the candles, so he'd nail the melody. Finally, he had to buy gifts. Eight of them. For three people. So, twenty-four gifts. He perused the dollar store, the budget section at Target, and every clearance section he came upon until he'd collected every last gift. Even wrapped them in paper adorned with little menorahs and dreidels.

The first night finally rolled along, and he could hardly contain himself. Ciri, too, was bursting with excitement; apparently Hanukkah was the one holiday her mother ever really bothered to celebrate with her. He wedged the first candle in place, carefully lit the shamash candle, and managed to return it to its spot without burning the house down. He led them in the two blessings without so much as a crack in his voice - plus shehecheyanu, which was reserved for the first night only (if reformjudaism.org was to be trusted, which he was sure it was) - and breathed a sigh of relief when even Geralt knew better than to blow out the candles. 

Gift-giving was always one of his favorite aspects of Christmas, so watching his family tear into his tiny presents and enjoying a warm embrace from each was easily his favorite part of the evening. They played a rousing few rounds of dreidel, in which Ciri inevitably won every last piece of gelt. The latkes he'd picked up at the kosher market were delicious, and this time it didn't even take Yennefer to convince him not to try cooking them from scratch. The final piece of the puzzle was the box of jelly donuts he'd hidden away from Geralt all day. 

And yet. Something was wrong, he felt like something had to be missing. It made him uneasy. So he finally did what he probably should've done to begin with; he reached out to a Rabbi.

"Are you looking to convert?" He was not prepared for the first question from the Rabbi - an older fellow named Levi with a gentle smile and kind eyes. 

"I don't think so. I'm not really sure what I'm looking for. Just to give my daughter a connection to her heritage, I guess." He'd been caught up in the personal mission of it all, but that was truly all that mattered. "We've always kind of been the spiritual-not-religious type, Christmas-Easter only. I was hoping there was something like that in Judaism, but there's so much history. It's hard to keep track." Levi nodded sympathetically.

"Judaism is beautiful because we are more than a religion - we are a people." He smiled fondly. "If you ask me, I don't think there's a wrong way to be a Jew."

"Then how do I know I'm doing enough?" That's all he really ever wanted, was to be enough. For Ciri, for Geralt and Yennefer, for his parents, for his students. "Which holidays do I celebrate? Is it okay if I can't bake my own challah? Do I really need to drag her to Yom Kippur services? Should she be Bat Mitzvah'd?"

"You ask a lot of questions, young man," he chuckled,  and Jaskier felt his cheeks flush. "Is she happy?" 

"Yes." That was at least an easy question to answer. Every step of the way, as overwhelmed and harried as he was, she was always a constant source of joy (or, at least, most of the time).

"Then there's your answer." There's his answer. Ciri is happy, and that's all that matters. Hanukkah 2018, it seems, was a success.

[tsuki-chibi]

Blackberries (Adrinette April) Day 22: Outfit Change

Or see it on AO3: Blackberries 

--------

When they emerged back outside, Adrien didn’t even care about the rain that was wetting his hair. He was so happy. Happier than he could remember being in ages. He grabbed Marinette’s hand and they ducked into an alley before he pulled her into a hug, then picked her right up off the ground and spun her in a circle. Marinette laughed as she wrapped her arms around Adrien’s neck, and Adrien was pretty sure he heard Tikki giggling too.

“You were magnificent in there!” Adrien said enthusiastically, beaming at her. “You didn’t even give him a chance to say no!”

“You were right there with me,” Marinette said, her smile widening as Adrien set her down. Her cheeks were flushed, and her eyes were sparkling. He couldn’t resist swooping down to kiss her. She kissed him back eagerly, their combined joy singing between them in a loop.

“Alright, alright,” Plagg said at last, poking his head out of Adrien’s pocket. “I know we’re all very happy things are back the way they should be, but I am a cat and I am getting very wet and so I am not happy.”

“Oops, sorry Plagg,” Marinette said, opening her umbrella. Though it was a little too late, since they were all soaked. Adrien stared at her in dismay, suddenly realizing that her clothes had gotten wet too.

“Mari, I’m sorry. Your outfit is ruined,” he said.

Marinette snorted. “Don’t worry about it. I was going to go home for an outfit change anyway,” she said. “I couldn’t possibly go to your show like this!” She indicated her clothing, which Adrien looked at with confusion. She was wearing pink cotton capris paired with a dark blue shirt that had pink flower petals embroidered all over it and blue flats, which was a very nice outfit.

“Why not?” he asked blankly.

“Seriously? Adrien, I’m going to be around a bunch of fashion designers. I have to look amazing,” Marinette said. She waved her hand at her clothes again. “This? Not amazing.”

“You always look amazing,” Adrien said. In fact, with her hair so wet it was falling out of her pigtails and her lips pinkened from their kiss, he thought that she had never looked more beautiful.

Marinette flushed. “Stop thinking like that! It’s embarrassing,” she complained, pressing one of her hands to her warm cheek.

“I can’t help it! It’s the truth. You’re beautiful no matter what you wear,” Adrien said.

“Ugh. Now I have to kiss you again for being so sweet,” Marinette mock-grumbled, pressing the umbrella into his hand before stepping closer. She grabbed the collar of his shirt and yanked him down into what was their most passionate kiss by far. And it worked: he stopped thinking about how pretty she was since that kiss was enough to make him forget how to think at all.

“Oh great, you broke him,” Plagg said when Marinette pulled away, and all Adrien could do was stare dumbly at her.

“Now that, I’m not sorry for,” Marinette said with a smirk, though she did pat Plagg on the head. “I’m going to run home and change. I probably won’t see you before your show, but I’ll be in the audience when you come out. And maybe we can meet afterwards?”

“Absolutely,” Adrien said after a pause, belatedly realizing she had asked him a question.

Marinette flashed him another smile and said, “Tikki, spots on!” Red light swirled around her, changing cotton into the red, black-spotted suit Marinette had missed so much. Ladybug sighed and ran her hands down the front of her suit, then fingered her pigtails before touching her mask, as though to make sure everything was back in place.

“Gosh, it’s nice to see you like that again,” Adrien said.

Ladybug sighed. “It’s nice to be this way again,” she admitted. “I’d like to see my kitty too.”

“Plagg, claws out!” Adrien said immediately. Green light swirled around him, comfortable and familiar: it was like coming home.

“There he is,” Ladybug said softly, cupping his cheek with her hand. She was smiling, though her eyes were a little watery for reasons that had nothing to do with the rain. Chat pressed his hand over hers and turned his head so that he could kiss her palm.

‘I really do have to go,’ he thought reluctantly, wishing that they had the time to take a run across Paris. Not for patrol purposes, but just for the sake of being able to do so again as Ladybug and Chat Noir.

‘Later,’ Ladybug thought. ‘You’ll get into trouble if you’re not there when Nathalie comes to get you. Go.’

Much as he hated to admit it, she was right. Chat kissed her hand one last time and then they both took to the rooftops, heading in different directions. He went straight home, landing on his windowsill and slipping into his room. He crossed to the piano and picked up his iPod, shutting it off and sneaking a quick glance at the time. He had just enough time for a shower.

“Plagg, claws in,” he said.

“I’m starving! That last kid tried to feed me cheddar!” Plagg cried as he exploded out of the ring.

“Oh my god, how terrible,” Adrien said, trying not to smile as he walked over to the mini fridge. He pulled it open, suddenly glad that he hadn’t had the heart to get rid of the stash of Camembert cheese inside. He took out a full wheel and set it down on the desk.

“Seriously?” Plagg said, watching the cheese with wide, greedy eyes.

“Consider it a welcome home gift,” Adrien replied, this time unable to stop a grin as Plagg squealed and pounced on the cheese. He left his kwami tearing at the wrapper and headed into the bathroom.

‘Tikki’s having a field day with my papa’s cookies,’ Marinette thought. ‘She said Coccinelle bought her a box of the supermarket biscuits.’

‘Clearly, they suffered,’ Adrien thought, stripping his sodden clothes off. Hoping that no one would notice them before they dried, he dropped them into his laundry hamper. Then he jumped into the shower and quickly washed his hair while Marinette was preoccupied with trying to figure out what to wear – which meant Adrien spent the whole shower calming her down and reassuring her that anything she wore would look lovely as she bounced from idea to idea.

‘It’s just so hard,’ Marinette thought fretfully. ‘I want to look just right.’

‘Why don’t you call Alya?’ Adrien thought, turning the shower off.

‘Good idea!’ Marinette thought, grabbing her phone.

“Adrien?” There was a knock at the door and Adrien jumped, realizing it was Nathalie.

“Yes, what is it?” he asked loudly, hoping that Plagg had had the sense to hide.

“We need to go,” Nathalie said. “Don’t bother drying your hair. Your stylist can do that. Just get dressed and come downstairs.”

“Got it,” Adrien said, quickly drying himself off. He pulled on a t-shirt and jeans and cracked the door to find that luckily, Nathalie had left. There was nothing but crumbs left of the cheese, and Plagg was hidden behind some of the books on Adrien’s desk. He let out a feeble groan when he saw Adrien.

“So… full…”

“I can’t believe you ate all of that.” Adrien shook his head as he gently picked his kwami up. “If you barf on me, you won’t get Camembert for a week.”

“Noted,” Plagg said with a loud belch.

“You’re so gross,” Adrien muttered fondly as he slid Plagg into the pocket of his shirt. Then he grabbed his raincoat, jammed his feet into his sneakers, and rushed out the door.

Gabriel was waiting for by the front door. His lip curled when he saw Adrien’s wet hair, but all he said was, “Adrien, I expect you to have a flawless performance today. You know you are representing both my company and the family name, and any mistakes will reflect negatively on all of us.”

“I know,” Adrien said quietly.

“You will be the best model there tonight,” Gabriel said, his tone allowing for no argument.

“Yes Father,” Adrien said, staring down at the floor.

“Good,” Gabriel said. “You may go.”

That was it. No pep talk, no ‘good luck’, not even a good-bye. Adrien swallowed as he slipped his coat on and followed Nathalie out into the pouring rain to the car. Marinette was a quiet presence in the back of his head radiating both sympathy and anger at his father, feelings which Adrien appreciated even through the disappointment. Maybe someday he would learn to stop expecting things of Gabriel Agreste. He hoped so if it meant that interactions with his father would hurt less.

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Like father, like daughter, like granddaughter; current!Brian May x reader

*Author’s note*

So after watching an ASMR video I got a few ideas in my head at first I was gonna do a parent fic with this but then it got me thinking that what I hardly see enough fics of is Rog and Brian being grandparents so I figured why not? So I hope you all enjoy a bit of grandpa Bri in this fic and enjoy all the fluffiness that entails with this :)

Taglist:

@psychosupernatural​

@plethora-of-things​

@waddles03​

@ixchel-9275​

@platawnic​

@simonedk​

@geek-and-proud​

@queendeakyy​

@kairosfreddie​

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I’ve lived a long life.  From touring one of the biggest groups throughout the 1970’s-80’s, dealing with my own personal struggles, and losing a very dear friend of mine.  But I’d say it wasn’t all too bad for a man of 72, still touring with my dear friend Roger Taylor and a young talented fellow known as Adam Lambert, continuing to help fellow artists produce their music, and watching my family continue to grow.

I think the last part is especially important to me.  Without my kids I—I don’t even wanna think where I would be after all the shit I’ve been through in my life.  I would’ve missed them growing up, achieving their dreams, and even becoming…..

“Papa! Papa!” Parents of their own.  Because I’ve now been promoted from parent to grandparent.  And it seems my youngest granddaughter needs me.  I quickly got out of bed and headed over to her bedroom to see her trembling in fear.  Tears were glistening on her cheeks, a sign that she had been crying.

“Hey, hey now.” I soothed her as I came up to her and sat down in front of her. “Oh Gina darling what’s wrong?”

“It—it was….it was…..” she started choking out but I gently soothed her with gentle coos and wiping away her tears as I brushed away her curly hair she not only inherited from me but from her mum as well.

“Shhh, it’s okay. It’s okay. You can tell me.” I brushed my thumb across her cheek comfortingly and she looked up at me with those doe-like eyes her mum had when she was her age.

“Nightmare again.”

“Ohh another one? Oh my poor little badger, I’m so sorry.” I cooed as I stroked through her mess of dark brown curls.  Yeah she was definitely her mother’s daughter.  When (y/n) was around her age, she somehow would always get frequent nightmares which was hard on me because I would always be away on tour, and all I wanted was to get on the next flight and be there by her side and hold her in my arms.

Now Gina was going through the same thing while her mum was away with her father filming somethings for her nature program she does for the BBC (which I’ll be honest I wasn’t really crazy she got hired by them but since it was BBC Nature, I overlooked it).

“I’m sorry papa. I—don’t mean to have nightmares all the time.”

“No, no don’t say that poppet. It’s alright. Your mum was the same way when she was your age.”

“She was?” she whimpered with a sniffle.  I hummed a nod as I wiped away a tear from her cheek.

“Yep. So never feel bad about it again, okay? Just like with your mum I’ll be there to help you, always. No matter what.” she nodded with a soft whimper.  I smiled softly before asking her, “Do you want to tell me what it was about?”

“A scary clown monster.”

“Oh no the clown monster again? Aww my poor badger cub.” I stroked her cheek and rubbed her shoulder comfortingly. “Do you want me to check under the bed?”

“I already did that.”

“You did? Well I’m very proud of you for doing that. God you’re getting so brave.” I praised.

“Yeah but it didn’t help.”

“Did it not?” she shook her head. I hummed as I continued to rub her arm soothingly. “Well what do you think will help? What can I do? Can I—tickle you?” I reached out but just before I could begin tickling her curled up into a ball giggling already and proclaiming no. “No? You don’t want that? Okay. Then can I—give you lots and lots of kisses?” I then started repeatedly kissing her cheek making her scrunch up and she cried out through her giggles.

“No! Not that either!”

“No? Okay, okay I don’t have to do that either. Then what can I do love?” she looked down and fiddled with the sheets before finally saying.

“Mummy.” I looked at her sympathetically and said.

“Ohh lovie you know she’s still away at work.”

“Still?”

“Yeah. She’s in Africa with your dad, remember?” she looked down sadly and said.

“Can’t we Facetime with her?”

“Well she said they may not get good signal for a Facetime, but we can try to call her.”

“Yes, please can we call her.”

“Okay. But just a heads up she may not answer because she might be out in the field getting the footage that she needs.” That girl was always a perfectionist just like—well just like her Uncle Freddie.  And I guess like me in a way.

“Okay.” She muttered.

“Okay love. I’ll give her a call.” I put my glasses over my eyes so that I could see as I unlocked my phone and scrolled through to find (y/n)’s number. “Let’s see here. Alright, now we’ll see if it’ll ring.” I pressed her number and it went silent for a moment but then I heard it ring. “Yep it’s ringing love.” She adjusted herself and that’s when I heard my daughter’s voice.

‘Hello?’

“Hey darling.”

‘Hey dad. What are you doing calling me so late?’

“I’m really sorry to bother you darling. We—had a little trouble sleeping again.”

‘Oh. I see, I see.’ She hummed.

“Yeah nightmares.”

‘Oh no are you kidding me? Another nightmare.’

“Afraid not love. Poor little one’s been taking it hard.” I said as I stroked Gina’s cheek. I heard my daughter awe sympathetically.

‘Well I can chat for a couple of minutes.’

“Oh that’s great love. I know she would love to hear your voice.”

‘You wanna tag team this?’

“Well you did learn from the best.” She laughed and said.

‘That I did dad. Alright give her the phone okay?’

“Okay.” I then handed her my phone and said, “There you go Gina.” She took the phone and held it to her ear.

“Mummy?”

‘Hey sweetie, how are you?’ I could hear my daughter say.

“I’m scared mummy. The clown was chasing me with a knife and taunting me.” Oh my poor cubby.

‘Oh my god that’s just awful. I mean that clown actually had the audacity to just chase you around like that. That’s awful.’

“So terrible.” I added as I stroked her cheek soothingly and tucked her curly hair behind her ear.

“Mummy don’t make fun of me.”

‘I would never make fun of you baby and you know that.’

“You promise?”

‘I promise. In fact I double pinkie promise.’

“Wow you are serious.” I smiled softly as I chuckled and I could hear (y/n) chuckle as well.

‘So what’s your pops doing now?’

“Stroking my hair.” I smiled down at her as she said that.

‘Ahh stroking your hair. Just like he used to do with me when he was home and I was in your spot.’

“Yeah but I don’t like it.” I gave her the puppy dog pout as I kept stroking through her hair.

‘You don’t? Why not?’

“Because my hair is too curly and messy.” Ahh the never ending cycle of curly hair insecurity.

‘Now, hey, hey, hey. Don’t say that Gina love. I think you have beautiful hair.’

“Why mummy?”

‘Why? Well because not only did you inherit your hair from me, you also got it from your lovely pops that’s in front of you.’ At hearing that I smiled.

“He always had the curly hair?”

‘Yeah. He was born with it.’ I grinned.

“So you like where you got your hair from?”

‘No wait, wait you can’t say that out loud.’ Too late she already said it. And now I officially know it now, even though I’ve had my suspicions that she slowly grew confident in her curly hair just like I did.

“Why mummy?” That’s my girl Gina.

‘Well because I don’t want your pops to know that he was right.’ Knew it!

“Worst kept secret ever.” I whispered to Gina which made her smile.

‘So if you wouldn’t mind just keeping it a secret between us girls? Mummy to daughter.’

“Okay mummy. I won’t tell pops that you love your curly hair too.”

‘No you—you can’t just go around telling him that!’ she laughed which made me laugh.

“Oh whoopsies.” She smiled cheekily at me. Oh she definitely was her mum’s daughter. We softly high fived each other and I gave her a thumbs up as we both heard my daughter moan embarrassingly. “Are you blushing mummy?”

‘Yeah I’m blushing a little bit.’

“It sounds like your lobster red right now.” Gina teased with a giggle.

‘No. Sweetie this, this—this is not about me and your pops. This is about you and you getting to sleep. Okay?’ To which I nodded cause now it seemed like Gina was trying to diverge herself from getting back to sleep, and she was too young to be staying up at 2 in the morning.

“Why can’t you and daddy be here with me?”

‘Well we’re at work sweetie.’

“Aww.” Gina solemnly whined softly.  I smiled sympathetically at her before playfully bopping her small little nose. She smiled and looked up at me just as I did it again and grinned down at her.

‘Yeah. We gotta make all that money. All that cheddar cheese as your father still likes to call it, for whatever reason. Can’t live off your pops forever.’ Well that’s not true, I’d always still support my daughter even if she gets too grownup. Every one of my children as gotten financial support from me if they were ever in a tight spot.

“Why does he say that mummy?”

‘Well sometimes grownups say that to describe money.’

“I wish you could really get paid with cheese.” At that both my daughter and I laughed softly.

‘Yes sweetie, it would be great if we could get paid in cheese.’ I heard (y/n) laugh again as she then said. ‘Are you hungry or something sweet pea?’

“Yeah.”

‘Well unfortunately you’re gonna have to wait until breakfast.’

“That’s for sure.” I whispered to her.

“Can I have chocolate cake?” Ohhh so much like her mum.

‘No sweetie you can’t have any chocolate cake.’

“Can I ask pops for a chocolate cake?”

‘No. You can’t ask pops for chocolate cake either.’

“I bet he would.”

‘Okay, go on and ask him. See what he says. Go on ask him.’ She then took the phone away from her ear and asked me with the sweetest puppy dog face that she could muster.

“Can I pwease have some chocolate cake?” I cupped her face in my hand and I said.

“What do you think?” At that point she knew what that meant as her puppy face turned to a kicked puppy face.

‘What’d he say?’ I heard (y/n) say.

“He said no.”

‘Oh what? Are you for real? Gosh who could’ve predicted that?’ she said sarcastically.

“I’ll tell you what poppet. If you can go make a chocolate cake, then we can have some.” I told her.

“I don’t wanna.”

“You don’t want to?” I asked her teasingly.

“No I don’t feel like making it.”

“You don’t feel like making it? Well, neither do I. So I guess it’s gonna have to be bedtime then ehh?” I said as I leaned in close to her so that our foreheads touched as well as our noses and I gave her an Eskimo kiss.

‘Ohh I love you so much lovie. And you know that I would give anything to be right there with you and your pops. To just hug and kiss you guys.’

“Yeah I know mummy. Can I get more kisses than pops when you come back?” I grinned at her.

‘Oh you want more kisses than pops when I come back? Okay I’ll allow that.’ I nodded in agreement and whispered to her.

“I’ll allow that.”

“Really?” she asked.

‘Yeah. He—he and I have an understanding when it comes to you. I give you more kisses than him, and he spoils you more than your father and I.’ I shook my head.

I did have a right to spoil all my grandchildren don’t I?  It was then I heard Gina sniffle and saw her eyes tearing up again.  I looked down at her and stroked through her hair trying to comfort her as her mum said.

‘Oh honey shhh. I want you to go to sleep now okay?’

“Your mother’s right poppet. Just shut your eyes.” I softly told her.

“Now?” she whimpered.

‘Yes now love.’

“Why?”

‘Because you’re a good girl. And nothing can ever hurt you or scare you anymore.’

“But it was so real mummy. What if the clown monster comes back?”

‘I promise sweetie, it was nothing but a bad dream. Nothing can hurt you or harm you in anyway in a dream. And if that mean ol clown does come back. He’s gonna have to deal with me.’

“Really?”

‘Mm-hmm. I’ll come into that dream of yours as a protective mama bear and tear that nasty beast limb from limb like all mama bears do.’ That’s for sure. (Y/n) was quite the protective mama bear.  

In fact she’s always been like that with your younger sister Emily, her cousins, and any of her friends.  Should anyone do her loved ones wrong, hell better have a spot waiting for the attacker cause there is no hiding from the wrath of (Y/n) Genevieve May.

‘And your father’s the same way too.’ At that I couldn’t help but raise my brow.

Now don’t get me wrong I do love and respect Rico but as the general rule of every father, we always feel protective of our little girls.  I think sometimes that Rico likes to brag about the fight’s he says he’s been in much like Roger did back in the old days (and Rog never won even when he claims he did).

“Really?”

‘Yeah. We’re quite the fighters. And again if you don’t believe me you can ask your pops. Go one ask him.’ As I stroked her cheek Gina asked me.

“Were mummy and daddy ever in fights?”

“Your mother, more than I can count. And she wins every single time. Your father on the other hand—” I shook my head. “He never won.” I whispered before shushing her as I heard (y/n) say.

‘What did he tell you?’

“He says you win every single fight but not daddy.”

‘What? Oh really?’ I heard (y/n) laugh. ‘Are you serious baby girl?’

“Yeah.” I chuckled and ducked my head down.

“He’s a bragger like uncle Roger.”

“He says daddy’s a bragger like uncle Roger.”

‘Oh does he now?’

“Yeah.”

‘Mm-hmm. Oh yeah your father will definitely hear about this love.’ I heard her laugh. ‘Don’t you listen to pops. Well I mean listen to him about other things but not that. He gets jealous sometimes.’ Oh that’s how she wants to play it huh?

“Don’t listen to mummy. She’s on my team.” I whispered to Gina teasingly.

‘But seriously though love. If you ever need a monster taken out. Like out, out. You call me and your daddy, okay?’ I then mouthed out to call me and only me.  Gina nodded and said.

“Okay mummy.”

‘That’s my girl.’

“So you sure you both can’t come home right away?”

‘Afraid not sweetie. Daddy and I are stuck at work.’

“Well can we do something fun together as a family together when you and daddy come back?”

‘What did you have in mind love?’

“A picnic.”

‘Yeah. Yeah we can go on a picnic.’

“That sounds like fun. We can even have it out near my forest.” I agreed.  Gina nodded and she asked her mum.

“Can you ask pops to come with us?”

‘Oh you want me to ask him? Okay. Put me on speaker sweetie.’

“Wait you could talk to both of us besides Facetime?” at that point both her mum and I laughed.

‘Yes there was a way long before Facetime to talk to more than one person. Give the phone to pops and he’ll do it.’ Gina handed me my phone and I pressed the speaker button and said.

“Okay love you’re on speaker.”

‘Alright can you guys hear me?’

“Not that I couldn’t hear you before.” I could just hear chuckle and feel the eyeroll she was doing and that’s when she asked.

‘Daddy. Would you and Anita like to go on a picnic with the three of us? I know, I know you would rather take your grandbaby out.’ At that statement I softly chuckled and shook my head. ‘But I just figured since—well I am still your little girl as you claim that you would want to spend the day with both your girls.’

“How dare you use my words against me.” I teased her.

‘Oh come on you’ve been taunting me with that for years.’

“Making me to be the bad guy here.”

‘After all these years I finally have leverage over you. So don’t you dare embarrass me in front of my kid.’

“Oh but that’s the best part.”

‘God and I’m not even there to defend myself.’ The two of us softly laughed as Gina just smiled at our playful banter.

“I would love to go on a picnic with you and your family (y/n).”

‘Great I win.’

“No I win. You know I always win.”

‘Dad!’ she whined out which made me chuckle.  God even at 35 she was still that stubborn little girl that always wanted to outdo me. ‘Okay then, I guess you’re still kinda a cool dad.’

“You guess?” I asked accusingly.

‘Yeah I guess.’

“After all I’ve done for you?”

‘Yep. I mean unless you do come to the picnic with us then maybe. I could learn to think you’re cool again. Or in current slag stan you. Right sweetie?’

“Oh stan me well then. Is that how it is huh?”

‘That’s exactly how it is you aging Queen.’ I grinned and shook my head.  Oh that (Y/n) May-Rodriquez.

“You need to get back to work?”

‘Yeah as a matter of fact we’re just about to leave the station right now.’

“Okay love. That’s what I thought.”

‘Yeah. Long day in the Serengeti. When all I really wish is to be there, seeing my dad and hugging and kissing my baby girl again.’

“Well you know we’d rather have you here too. But that’s okay.” I said as I stroked Gina’s cheek.

‘Okay. Well give them a big kiss for me please?’

“You got it love.” I then leaned forward and kissed my granddaughter long and lovingly on her cheek which made her giggle.  As I let out a ‘mwah’ I heard (y/n) softly chuckle and she continued.

‘And Gina baby, will you give your pops a kiss for me?’ I gestured to my cheek and she gave me a long and sweet kiss which made me feel warm and toasty inside.

“I did it mummy.”

‘Good. Now will you both give me a kiss to say goodbye.’ It was then both Gina and I made a long kissing sound before letting out a mwah.  I then heard my daughter moan warmly and I could just picture her being all gooey and making that mushy face that she used to call it. ‘Oh I love it. So much! Alright.’

“We love you darling.”

‘I love you too dad.’

“Please be safe out there.”

‘Always am. Get my baby back to bed okay? And I’ll see you at the airport in—two days?’

“You got it love.”

‘Great. Oh hey. Don’t start watching Doctor Who without me okay?’

“Oh I don’t know.” I taunted her.

‘Hey no dad seriously. Don’t watch the new Doctor without me! I’ve been waiting for this day since forever.’

“I guess I could wait.”

‘I don’t believe you.’ My daughter bluntly stated which made me laugh.

“Well you went and saw the 50th special without me. You’re not one to talk.”

‘Okay yes, yes I did but only because Rico wanted to see it for our date. Plus you were on tour the day it came out.’ She tried to reason her excuse to which I shook my head.

“Bye (y/n), love you darling. Say love you mummy.” I told Gina.

‘I love you too dad.’

“Love you mummy.”

‘I love you too sweetie. Daddy and I will be home soon.’

“Okay love, bye.”

‘Bye.’ And with that we hung up.  I removed my glasses and had them hanging around my neck and I looked back up to Gina as I put my phone aside.

“Did that help at all poppet?” she nodded.

“Yes.”

“You looked more relaxed so I know it did. But in all seriousness, if you ever do need a monster taken care of. While mama bear is fiercely protective over you. Pops Fox is twice as protective.” I pointed to me and gave her a wink.  She softly giggled and nodded which made me smile at her. “Okay now, let’s get you settled back into bed love.” She adjusted herself back down onto her pillow and I tucked her back into bed. “There we go, snug as a hedgehog in a log.”

“Papa Brian.”

“What is it dear?”

“Will you—sing me a lullaby?” she looked up at me with those big doe eyes of her that she inherited from her mum and it was like seeing her as a child once again.

“What shall it be tonight my love?”

“The astronaut song.” I smiled.

“39 it is then. But before I sing, I want you to shut your eyes okay?”

“You promise you won’t leave if I do?”

“Of course. Now come on, close those pretty little tired eyes of yours.” I said as I stroked her cheek with my thumb.  She then closed her eyes and that’s when I began to sing to her the song that not only helped comfort her after a nightmare, but also the song that won her mother over every time, even when she was a baby.

It wasn’t until I got to the second refrain that I took notice of the deep breathing coming from my granddaughter.  I smiled softly and leaned forward and very lightly kissed her cheek.

“Goodnight my little badger. Sail across the cosmos and dream only good dreams.” And with that I softly closed the door and headed to be myself.

*Extended ending*

It was the next day and as Gina was watching some telly, it was then her mum’s program was now being advertised.

“Papa! Look it’s mummy’s voice!” I smiled as I came over from the kitchen and I watched the trailer alongside my granddaughter..

“Many tales have been told of the African lion. But this is her story. A drama set in the heart of her homeland. Experience as you live and breathe it, through the eyes of one brave lioness. Every day she is put to the test. By the elements, by the seasons, and by constant threat of not only her enemies, but her own kind.”

Each shot of the trailer for (y/n)’s new show showed beautiful shots of various locations of the African savannah or closeups of various animals.  I’ll admit Rico was an excellent filmmaker, just the way he can get the HD film shot and make you feel like you’re actually there is just—phenomenal.

“Mummy!” It was then I saw my daughter on screen now as she spoke.

“Join me and my team as we venture deep into the heart of Africa. In a place that is known—as the Serengeti.” Then her show’s theme song started playing.  I saw the credits of her team and of course BBC Nature pop up on screen as various footage from her previous episodes came on.  From her riding an elephant in the Indian jungle, to swimming with a pod of dolphins in the Pacific coast near Hawaii.

I saw her name “DR. (Y/N) MAY-RODRIQUEZ” appear on screen as she put down her binoculars with the wind blowing her hair (like she was a true action film star on the big screen) before cutting to various faint shot around her interacting with different animals.  Like holding a fox in her hand, having a snake wrapped around her shoulders or dodging a crocodile’s attack.

It was then Rico appeared on the screen being credited with the filmmaker’s status.  I saw as my little badger cub was entranced at seeing her parents on the telly and their show’s intro.  Various shots of where they’ve done a show came on from climbing a rocky mountain or deep in the jungles.

Until finally the show’s title “MAY-RODRIQUEZ EXPEDITION” came across the screen with a silhouette shot of their jeep acting like it was driving over the top of the title card.  Then the premiere date came below which was this summer.

“I love their show.” Gina said.

“So do I love.” From the day that (y/n) found that nest of baby hedgehogs when she was just 7 years old, she had always had a love for animals much like myself.  I educated her on my knowledge of certain animals like foxes, badgers and hedgehogs but as she grew older she got more involved with studying animals.

So much so that she went to the same University as her uncle Roger and majored in animal and marine biology.  From then on she got closer and closer with getting up close and personal with the animals and has loved every second of it.  

Even when I still fear for her life when she handles the deadliest animals like sharks, and reptiles like crocs and snakes (I’m a papa bear to her what can I say?), I still see her on screen handle them with such bravery and respect knowing that it was her and not them and remaining absolutely calm.

It was then the door suddenly opened and I heard a familiar voice say.

“We’re home!”

“MUMMY! DADDY!” Gina quickly raced out of the living room and soon coming in holding her was my beautiful daughter (y/n) and her husband Rico.

“Hey sweetie, were you good for pops and nana Anita?” her father asked.

“Uh-huh. I was.”

“Mama told me you had a nightmare again mija, you okay?”

“Sí papa, pops and mama helped me last night.”

“Well this is a surprise, I thought I was going to pick you both up at the airport tomorrow.” I said.

“Well we actually got done a day early so we figured a surprise visit was in order. Especially after last night.” (y/n) said as she came up and the two of us hugged each other. “Thank you so much dad for helping her.”

“Hey, I always look after my girls don’t I?” I said as she grinned up at me and laid her head on my chest.  Oh I was happy to have my girl back safe and sound, and I know her daughter was happy to have her mum back.

“Mummy, did you bring me anything from Africa?” of course Gina would ask that, because just like her mother, she always wanted souvenirs.

“I sure did, but first come here you little secret sharer. I promised you I’d deal with you for spilling out those secrets the other night to pops.” It was then I saw (y/n) swoop in and take her daughter in her arms and began tickling her and giving her raspberries onto her cheek.

As I watched the loving sight, I couldn’t be more proud of all that I accomplished in my life. Sure I achieved the rock and roll dream, formed an Animal activist voice and got my astrophysics degree.

But the real prize was right in front of me.  Seeing my daughter achieve her dreams, and seeing her raise her own child and find someone that loved her just as much as I loved her.

[bluepenguinstories]

Happiness Overload Epilogue I

“New universe, new me”, isn’t that the statement?

Not like I gave a fuck what the statement was. There was more important things like saving the world (or one of them, at least), making sure the ETNA Corporation and Marco were both dead, and/or making sure I was dead.

That last one was most important. Didn’t need me fucking up my chances of victory.

So there I was, back in that familiar city, and that was when I saw myself.

Wait. Holy fuck. Has that ever happened before?

“Holy fuck. Is that me?” Me said to me.

Yeah, yeah. That was confusing, but that wasn’t me who said that. That was me.

I probably asked me if that was me, too, but I couldn’t remember.

Before I knew it, I saw me run up to go kick my ass (just like I would’ve done to me, let’s be real), but as soon as I saw myself start to run across some train tracks, a train at top speed sped by and hit the me that was headed toward me. I heard the screams, the splat.

I flinched. Cringed, even. That was really how it was with me, wasn’t it? So cringe. So much blood and guts, and I had to watch.

“Top ten Kelly Roger deaths: number nine will shock you,” I found the words to say at long last.

It never got easier, did it? Always watching myself die and then going off elsewhere to fuck shit up. At least couldn’t it be a little less gruesome? Seriously, I probably had nine counts of PTSD.

I more or less stood in place as the train went by. I say “more or less” as if I didn’t just stand in place while the scene kept playing over in my head.

Yeah, rather un-epic of me, but IN MY DEFENSE, everyone else around me had gotten out of their cars, or stopped what they were doing in the crowded streets, all to watch the tragedy of one dumbass doing a dumbass thing (note: you’re supposed to look both ways before you cross, you idiot). Finally, when the train went on about its way and there was a dark red stain on the train tracks, I decided to take off to the next universe. With any luck, the next time I watched myself die wouldn’t be as gruesome.

“Kelly Roger, is that you?”

“Son, sometimes daughter?”

What-the-

I squinted. It was my parents. They ran across. Great. Were they gonna get ran over too?

Nope. They stood right next to me. Greeeaaaat. How do I worm my way out of this one?

“I thought you died!” My mom burst into tears. “Just now, in fact!”

“Oh, yeah. I did. But I got better,” were the words I used to worm my way out. Yes, many people used “weasel out” as the analogy, but back in my humble beginnings, I used to put malware and “worms” on people’s computers just for fun. Ah, back when things were more simple.

“I don’t understand, but I’m so glad you’re okay!” My mom hugged me real tight even though I was wearing a super badass suit and being hugged like that wasn’t so super badass.

“Yeah, yeah, real talk though, is there anything called ‘ETNA’ in this universe?”

“A what-Na?” My dad asked, as if I was the one who told bad jokes.

“Oh, what about anyone named Marco? Know anyone like that?”

They both shook their heads. That stirred up some emotions. That could only mean one thing: I won. I finally did it! I didn’t have to go to other universes! I saved the day, just like I knew I would! Except there was just ONE thing I had to confirm.

“Do you guys have Wi-Fi?”

“Y-yes,” both my parents sobbed. “We do.”

Whoa. This really was the best timeline.

I stripped out of my Kamen Rider costume (that wasn’t what it was? Too bad. I’ve already decided a few universes ago that’s what it was). Don’t worry, I was still wearing clothes. No need to sweat the small stuff. Speaking of…

“KR, your pits smell like ass,” my mom sounded concerned.

“Yes,” I laughed and sobbed in good measure. I was just so happy to get my perfect ending. “Yes they do.”

“Would you like to come back home with us,” my dad asked, coming in clutch. As if he even had to. Everyone knew I loved places that had Wi-Fi living with people who loved me.

All was well; it was the perfect ending that I totally deserved, up until one final moment: when we came home and as soon as my parents opened the apartment door, we were greeted by someone I both never expected to see, and never wanted to see. Unless I was just seeing someone who looked like someone I didn’t want to see, which, either way, I didn’t want to see what I was seeing.

“Welcome home, guys,” she spoke, her brown ponytail flapping in the lack of wind. “Missed you, honey,” she kissed my mom on the cheek.

“Oh, Celia V,” my mom giggled, something gross and  unwarranted. But also...what? The fuck? Celia-fucking-fuck? “My husband is right there.”

“How did you get here?!” I balked.

“That’s right, we didn’t tell you,” my dad went on to explain. “When you left home, we were quite lonely and, coincidentally, after going out for dinner one night, there was this poor woman begging for money on the street. She said she was an orphaned twenty-something who had just left home and quit her job because her boss was, like, the literal devil or something. We really like having her around.”

“And her name is…?”

“Celia V, like your mom said.”

Okay, okay. Relax. There had to be some kind of explanation for that. Like, probably a whole “alternate universe version of that person” sorta thing. Yeah. Totes plausible.

Would have been, until once I stepped through the door, she leaned over and whispered to me:

“I fucked your mom.”

On the outside, I was a hero. Savior of many. On the inside, I was screaming.

“By the way, tonight is pizza night. It’s Celia’s favorite,” my dad informed me.

Papa Dad’s pizza. My least favorite. Actually, it was super great. Only the cheesiest and greasiest, but trust me, when you work a job at a fast food franchise, you start to find that food gross.

“Oh, also, we’re gonna binge watch Boruto tonight,” my mom added. “It’s Celia’s favorite show.”

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WHERE IS MY SUIT I WANT OUT OF THIS UNIVERSE.

After hours of watching some shitty uncultured show, I finally managed to excuse myself to my room. How did my parents enjoy that garbage? Naruto was much higher quality. Like sharp chedder vs blue cheese. In case it wasn’t obvious, sharp cheddar was the higher quality.

Once in my room, however, the nightmare continued. On the top bunk, there she was: alright laying down and reading some shitty manga. On the bottom bunk was a buncha computer equipment which would’ve been super cool had it belonged to me, but because it wasn’t, it was lame.

“Where am I supposed to sleep?!”

“Aw, kiddo. There’s a sleeping bag in the closet. Just try not to let any fallen computer parts crush you to death. It’s quite messy in there.

“This is my room! I’m their kid! Their 20 year old kid, but still!”

“Yeah, but I fucked your mom.”

I was fuming. What a power move. Such a gross, disgusting power move that I didn’t ever want to think about, in fact, I’d rather think about one of the many times I’ve seen myself die than think about that, but a power move all the same.

“At least there’s Wi-Fi in this apartment. If this is the worst it can get, I think I can manage.” I thought was an innocent enough thought to say aloud, but it wasn’t. It was a war crime.

“Oh, also, in case you’re wondering, I found out how to travel through dimensions, too, all so I could ditch my boss. So, yes. We got history.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

The End.

Bonus:

The next day, I sat in the living room and sulked. My dad walked by, worried about my mental state.

“What’s wrong, KR?” Dad asked.

“Celia V. fucked my mom,” I replied, any sense of joy absent from my voice.

My dad laughed.

“That’s not possible, because I’m married to your mom.”

Over in the dining room, Celia V. stood and sneered.

“I fucked your mom, shitlips.”

The nightmare just would not end.

[silverfootstepswrites]

Lullaby [80%]

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Read Equinox here and come back!

Sakura went into labor in the middle of a debate about mac and cheese. Kiba argued that yellow cheeses were the only acceptable inclusions in the mix, while Itachi argued that mixing gouda and cheddar with parmesan was the only way to make a good mac and cheese. 

As the argument moved on to acceptable pasta shapes, Sakura debated whether or not to interrupt. She let them bicker over whether to bake the dish covered in foil or uncovered before she finally decided to speak up. 

“So....” she began. Both of them looked up at her. 

“Yeah, babe?” Kiba replied, still a little distracted. His eyes stayed on his phone screen as he looked up mac and cheese recipes online. 

“I’m having contractions. For real, this time,” Sakura announced. 

Itachi dropped his phone. Kiba dropped his jaw. 

“Uh. Holy shit. Um...” Kiba fumbled. "Is the bag all packed? Should we call the doctor first? Or do we just call the hospital?” As he fretted, Itachi got out of his seat to go look for the hospital bag. Which wasn’t much of a challenge given that it had sat in the mudroom for the better part of a month. 

“Are you calling the hospital?” Kiba then asked when Itachi wandered back into the room with his phone held to his ear. He placed the packed bag on the kitchen table. 

“No. The Sheriff,” Itachi replied. The call connected. He held his pointer finger up.

“Hey, Kakashi..... Yeah, uh. Everything’s.... good... Just.... Sakura might be going into labor. But everything is fine. Just wanted to.... hello? Hello?” Itachi lowered the phone. Kiba smacked his palm to his forehead as they heard the wail of police sirens over the phone.

_________

The hospital they’d chosen was just outside of Old Pines. It was an older building, but it was the one place Kakashi could manage to visit as it sat sort of on the edge of town. The added bonus was that it served Old Pines, along with the other magical communities scattered around the area. None of these other communities were the size of Old Pines, but it was a sizable enough population that the hospital was necessary. Of course, there were humans who visited the hospital, too. The reception area was busy with human buzzing about when they walked in.

Tobirama strode up the reception desk, lowering his black sunglasses. The pretty, young receptionist looked up from her phone call. Her mouth hung open in the middle of her greeting. The voice on the other end of the line continued jabbering away as she stared at Tobirama. 

“Move it, Sexy Eyes. We don’t have time for this,” grumbled Kiba, nudging past Tobirama. 

“Hey how are you. Pregnant lady giving birth,” Kiba announced in one breath, jabbing his thumb at Sakura standing behind him. Sakura gave a casual nod. 

The receptionist continued to stare at Tobirama, who hadn’t even said anything yet. When he turned to look back at them, Sakura just sighed. Itachi flapped a hand, telling him to get out of the way. But the receptionist’s wistful gaze followed him.

Sakura rolled her eyes as she craned her neck. She spotted a nurse jotting down notes on a clipboard on the other end of the reception desk. She was definitely a human. Further back, she spotted another nurse looking through folders, thumb running along the colored tabs. As the nurse looked up, her eyes flickered gold. Just for an instant. Sakura smiled at her. 

“Hi. Help, please,” Sakura called, glancing at the stupefied receptionist. The nurse smiled back. 

“Sure,” the nurse replied, stepping forward. And over the receptionist’s shoulder, she mouthed ‘humans’. Laughing a little.

It was a smooth process checking in. Sakura’s name and information was already stored on the database. She had come to this hospital for her ultrasounds and checkups throughout her pregnancy. The nurses stopped in regularly to monitor Sakura’s vitals. The doctor poked her head in once during the afternoon to say hello. She was a fairy and was therefore unaffected by their charm. 

Labor. Delivery. It all seemed to move relatively quickly. And while everyone did their best to smile and keep things light, Sakura could see the nervousness in their eyes. The tight shoulders. The wondering gazes that flickered back and forth between them. 

When the first high-pitched cries rang out in the delivery room, everyone seemed to hold their breath. The nurses wiped away the blood, holding the child up for everyone to see. Sakura squinted to see through the sweat that dripped into her eyes. 

It was a wrinkly, ugly-looking thing. And the cries that left its mouth rang with a strange after-sound. Something warbling in each echo. Sakura could feel the lapis lazuli on her chest hum slightly under her hospital gown. Or maybe that was the thrumming of her chest as she beheld the squished face she had only even seen on an ultrasound.

“It’s a girl!”

“Not a pup,” she vaguely heard Kiba sigh. When she turned her head toward him, she saw Itachi reach out to clap him on the shoulder. 

Sakura held her arms out. The nurses laid the baby on her chest. Sakura wondered at how light she felt. Almost like nothing. And the baby’s whines faded as Sakura hummed. Toneless and soft under her breath. 

The song took the form of a golden thread. Wrapping around the child. Swaddling it in the familiar voice that it had spent listening to for all those months.

Kakashi knelt beside the bed. Staring up at the baby, eyes wide with wonder. His face split into a wide smile as he watched the baby wrinkle her face up, as if preparing to cry. 

“Who gets to cut the cord?” one of the nurses whispered, eyes flickering between each of the four men in the room. 

Without a moment of hesitation, Tobirama, Itachi, and Kiba all pointed at Kakashi. 

“Him.”

Kakashi blinked. He twisted around to look at them. He didn’t know when they’d made this decision. But when he opened his mouth to argue, Tobirama just scowled at him. Kakashi closed his mouth. 

When he looked over at Sakura, she smiled. 

“Go ahead, Papa,” she urged. 

Itachi caught the moment on his phone as Kakashi cut the cord. As he snickered at how Kakashi was crying, he looked up and realized that there were tears in his own eyes too. 

_________

“She’s cute,” Tenten whispered. 

“She looks like you,” Hana added. 

“She does. Like, a lot,” Ino agreed. 

The baby squirmed a little in her crib. The hair on top of her head was wispy, but it was light. Almost pinkish. And in the brief flashes when she opened her eyes, they looked green.

“Oh, that’s normal. That’ll change in a couple months. Probably,” Sakura told them. 

“Probably?” all three of them repeated. 

“Who knows? She’s at least....uh- 3/8 Siren, so... maybe? We’re kind of figuring it out as we go,” Sakura answered. And then she thought a little longer. “Or not. She might just look like this forever. Which is fine with me.”

“Can I hold her?” Hana then asked. 

“Yeah. Of course,” Sakura replied as she reached into the crib to lift her child into her arms. She carefully deposited the baby in Hana’s waiting arms. She wasn’t nervous, though. Hana was a mom herself. And if Sakura hadn’t known this, could tell just from the easy way she shifted her weight from foot to foot.

Tsume leaned over Hana’s shoulder, nose wrinkling. She sniffed a little at the baby before she touched a cautious finger to her cheek. 

“She’s really hairless,” Tsume murmured. 

"That’s normal, Ma. This is a baby, not a pup,” Hana reminded her. 

“Makes no difference. This is Kiba’s kid with his mate. That’s good enough for me,” Tsume declared. And then she moved around Hana to put her arm around Sakura’s shoulders. 

“And you!” she went on.

“Uh... yes?”

“Stop callin’ me by my name. Call me ‘Ma’, just like the rest of my brats do,” Tsume demanded. 

"Sounds good, Ma,” Sakura laughed.

_________

Over the next several weeks, there was no shortage of visitors to Sakura’s house. There was always someone at the door with a casserole or baked goods. The ones who had children of their own brought hand-me-downs in giant reusable shopping bags. Enough that Sakura could’ve opened her own clothing store if she wanted.

“It’s good to raise a baby in a loud environment,” Tobirama’s mother assured her. 

“Really?”

Sakura turned to face the computer screen. Swaying back and forth as she held her child in her arms. She wasn’t a very fussy baby, but she did enjoy being held. Which Sakura guessed was probably because she had no shortage of people in the house fighting to hug her.

“It’s what I did for all four of my boys. I think it was good for them,” the older woman confirmed.

“So we think it’s great you always have guests over. Although I’m guessing living with that many people in one nest can’t be that quiet either,” Tobirama’s dad chimed in.

“It’s pretty calm most of the time, actually,” Sakura told them.

The back door crashed open.

“Guys! Babe! You’ll never believe it! I took down a moose in the forest!” Kiba shouted. 

“A moose? What do you even season a moose with?” Itachi demanded from the living room. And then there was the sound of furious typing and clicking.

“For the millionth time, Kiba, you need a hunting permit for native species,” Kakashi sighed from the other end of the house. 

“Put him in jail, Sheriff. Maybe he’ll stop eating all my granola,” Tobirama suggested from the sofa on the loft. His head lolled back against one arm of the sofa. His feet were up on the other.

“Most of the time,” Sakura said again with a sheepish grin.