#cal kestis needs a poncho

[breakfastteatime]

Hiya! I sent an ask a while ago about Greez bundling up Cal for the cold on Ilum lol, but now I'm having feels on the default being the Bracca poncho... It's an emotionally heavy poncho at this emotional point of the game! Does anyone recognize this? Is it a comfort blanket situation? Or are his other ponchos still in the laundry?

Greez won't let Cal off the ship until he's wearing at least one extra layer. Cal remembers Ilum's bitter chill from his last trip here, except back then there hadn't been a storm, and he'd been surrounded by other Jedi. The cold barely features in his memory, honestly. Mostly, he remembers how afraid he'd been of failure, and how wonderful it had been to find his crystal and see his lightsaber working for the first time.

He doesn't think it will be so easy a test this time.

Cal heads to the engine room, where BD-1 makes a few suggestions about what Cal should wear. Cal appreciates his friend's concern. Yes, he probably should consider bundling himself up in every poncho he owns. Instead, he reaches for the one he's had the longest. The poncho from Bracca has seen him through a lot of bad weather. It's been a blanket and a pillow on a few occasions too. Sure, it was mass-produced and effectively a uniform, but it's Cal's. He's had it since he grew out of his last one. He knows all the Jedi lessons on attachment to possessions, and right now he does not care. He needs something to hold onto, something familiar and reliable. This poncho is very nearly the only constant he has in his entire life, and if he thinks about that too hard, he is absolutely going to come apart. It's going to see him through whatever happens here.

Pulling it on, Cal takes a deep breath and prepares to face his next challenge.

(Anon, I could NOT resist this! The Bracca Poncho is officially Cal's Emotional Support Poncho)

[mabsart]

[Jedi : Fallen Order]

Second play through doodle dump.

I was worried it would loose some of its luster now that I already knew what to expect but I had an even BETTER time. (There’s so much in game interaction between Merrin and Greez that I missed the first time and they’re such a funny pair.)

[arunicdeath]

Shhhhh, don't mention the Inquisitor's poncho.

Anyways I've needed a drawing of Inquisitor Cal still wearing his ponchos for months now and I've finally done more than just a doodle for it.

[radiosummons]

It's 12 or 11 some minutes past midnight and my brain is absolutely mush from studying for this stupid licensing exam.

And the only thing I got left in my fucking brain is that one image of Cal with his poncho hood up:

It makes me wish that the rest of the collectable ponchos in game also had hoods. Or that one of Cal's idle animations could have been flipping his hood on or off. Or like .. literally anything with the hood, idk.

I just think he looks fucking adorable, okay?

Update: Okay, so have more poncho hood Cal Kestis (cause I still can't get enough of it-I have a problem, okay?)

I don't why but I just fuck with him having a poncho hood PFFFTTT

[rriverrgrace]

I’m going to be honest. any time I see cal kestis without a poncho I’m just: why he nakey

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being another displaced Padawan with Cal Kestis

Cal Kestis x jedi!reader

warnings: angst, STAR WARS JEDI SURVIVOR SPOILERS

a/n:

prompt:

you and cal went way back

like, jedi padawan back

so after the purge, about five years later, you guys reunited by chance. thanks to cere junda, no less

and, god, seeing someone so familiar after trying to get by on your own, someone who knew the feeling of the trajectory of your life being thrown off before you were ready, that wasn’t easy to come by

“you’re here” -cal

“i’m here” -you

“we survived” -cal

“just barely” -you

cere was delighted that the two of you could have lifted each other’s spirits so much, which was very much needed in desperate times, as you two were just given a very important mission by a former jedi master in your order

you and cal kicked some serious ass together, helping one another relearn old lessons your masters had taught during your youth

“i think running across walls was the hardest thing i was ever taught” -you

“it took me forever to get that right! i could only get two steps in before i plummeted to the floor!” -cal

you shared a lot of stories and emotions during travels, in private

and not all of them were positive, but this was the first chance you’d had in five years to face these emotions, to air out your feelings

“do you miss the clones? i was so fond of our battalion, they were always so kind to me” -you

“i think…i think that was the worst part. the people who defended us in battle, gave me pep talks before training, always there, that same face at every turn suddenly behind the blaster that was meant to put me down” -cal

“i miss them” -you

cal and you had your missions together…and separately. you’d be on one planet and he on the other, trying to race the empire and inquisitors to the holocron

“it could happen all over again” -you

“it could be the key to saving the galaxy” -cal

“or we’d be creating a generational tragedy” -you

“so would the empire” -cal

“you’ve got me there” -you

cal gifting you ponchos from his travels (lol)

“any chance you like pink?” -cal

“well…” -you

braving zeffo alone while you knew cal was somewhere far more dangerous, you had a bad feeling about it

but your teachings from the order were always the same, no attachment. mission first, feelings second…no, last

but on cal’s adventure, he found merrin, a nightsister from dathomir

you hadn’t seen any nightsisters since ventress, which did happen to make you feel a bit off

“cal…you sure?” -you

“trust me, y/n. things have changed. merrin is just like us” -cal

“cal told me much about you. another survivor. a pleasure” -merrin

you and merrin grew quite close actually

she was truly spectacular, and swapping stories with her was sort of educational

“wait…the jedi responsible for the nightsister genocide? you said lightsabers, plural? how many?” -you

“four” -merrin

“two green, two blue?” -you

“precisely. how did you know?” -merrin

“hang on, no way—” -cal

“my master killed him shortly before we were split up…when the clones turned” -you

“grevious? really? master kenobi finally got him?” -cal

“who is this ‘grevious?’” -merrin

“general grevious, he was a separatist general—a cyborg. he wasn’t a jedi, he stole lightsabers from his kills. he ordered the attack on your home” -cal

“i’m so sorry, merrin” -you

you three were still healing from many scars, but doing it together was much more achievable than trying alone

it was a wonder you even made it to fortress inquisitorius

you, cal, cere. all three of you fought like hell to save those kids.

now, cal and you, you two had much different perspectives than say, cere or trilla

displaced padawans. little guidance. cal was barely old enough to even be a padawan learner, but times were desperate and the order called upon the youngling to start quite early. you were in a similar boat. it made you two see eye to eye better than most

trilla, a padawan with much more training and insight, one who was failed by the order that she was most loyal to. failed by her own master.

cere, a devout jedi master who failed many people who were counting on her. who lost herself to a side of herself that every jedi is supposed to fight.

and just before any resolution could come of all of you together, the famed and feared darth vader showed himself

and the sinking feeling you felt before he arrived froze you

“what is it, y/n? y/n?” -cere

*ominous breathing sounds*

you shook off the feeling, fleeing instead

cal and you were split up when you swore vader made a point to hold you back

“run cal! get out of here!” -you

“y/n l/n, i was hoping i would see you” -vader “where is obi-wan?!”

“i thought you were dead” -you

“is that what he told you?” -vader

“you’re going to kill me to get back at him? i haven’t seen him since the purge, anakin! i left!” -you

“there is no anakin!” -vader “did you leave, or did he leave you?”

“are you just going to let cal get away?” -you

“he can’t get far” -vader

“my journey is not important to you” -you

“you are like me, y/n. obi-wan failed us. these inquisitors are weak, impressionable, disposable. but i know how you think. i know how he thinks. i give you the opportunity to join me. fight with me.” -vader

“i saw the holotapes, anakin. i saw what you did to the younglings and i will not let you do it again. we are not alike, obi-wan did not fail me. i took a page out of ahsoka’s book, i found my own path. and it is not beside you.” -you

“this is not over, y/n. i trust you’ll find your way out” -vader, force pushing you off a ledge

you did find you way back out and merrin was quick to save you before going back for cal

you were left completely unharmed, as well, which was quite the surprise to everyone else

“what happened back there, y/n?” -cal

“nothing i’d like to relive” -you

cal nodded and let it go, focusing on the holocron floating before you all

your mind kept replaying memories as they discussed what to do with it

memories of anakin’s massacre. vader’s speech. younglings you couldn’t save. luke and leia somewhere across the galaxy. the inquisitors.

“destroy it.” -you

in one quick swipe, cal took his lightsaber to the glowing blue cube. no questions asked

and from there on, it was no longer about the order. you remembered why you left in the first place. the purge, the politics, your master couldn’t contain himself. your troops turned their blasters on you. everything you were taught was bantha fodder. and you were just a padawan

it was now about disassembling. scaring the people in power while giving the little guy some hope.

“this is a much better gig than obi-wan playing by the rules” -you

“from what you told me, him and anakin never played by the rules” -cal

the name made you shudder, but you pushed past it

“well, anakin was known as the rulebreaker. obi-wan always tried to reel him in. but, i’ve noticed a rule or two that master kenobi had bent” -you

“anakin has a padawan too, right?” -cal

“he did. she was also a rule breaker. when she left the order, i almost followed her. last i heard, she went to mandalore with half of the 501st. i, uh—” -you

“right…” -cal

you were still haunted from the encounter on nurr. still hadn’t told cal and it was eating you up inside.

but the fighting made it feel better

dismantling, stealing, helping

and then merrin left. and cere. and greez settled down. and you and cal were just two makeshift jedi knights with your tragic pasts and your need to keep your place in the galaxy

and keep each other close

but not too close

those rules you followed, the one’s obi-wan followed, you threw them out a long time ago. the jedi order was corrupt. you examined each council master postmortem and decided that they were all flawed despite their rank. you hated them for it.

but decided the one teaching you would follow would be to lose hate, a step to the dark side.

you didn’t really even know at this point, what was the difference between right and wrong anymore

cal and you continued fighting. joined up with saw gerrera. never left each other’s sides

which…sparked feelings you’d never really been taught or told how to deal with

only aversion, really. but it wasn’t like you didn’t really talk about it

“i don’t really see the problem with it. look at everything else we do, that’s not exactly the jedi way” -you

“it’s dangerous” -cal

“love is dangerous?” -you

“attachment is” -cal

“i figured you already had attachments. we were all a crew before this” -you

“i let them all go” -cal

“and you’d let me go?” -you

you began constantly questioning these ways and trying to fight for a new future with cal, without pressing too hard

but it was hard to ignore those feelings and harder to constantly be denied by your old life

and it was harder when the new crew always teased you two

“come on, kestis. if you don’t, i will” -gabs

“yeah, just go for it. who’s it hurting?” -bravo

“i’m just not ready to go there” -cal

you were more bothered than you let on

but you always put the mission first

up until your trip back to coruscant

“this is just a reminder of how little it all matters now. there’s no one left.” -you

“that’s why it matters” -cal

the intensity of this mission made it so it was just the two of you again

and maybe that would spark something…but you doubted it

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @locke-writes // @sweetheartlizzie07 // @queen-destenie // @captainshazamerica // @ravenmoore14 // @gabile18 // @sweetjedi // @retvenkos // @swanimagines // @randomfandomimagine // @dontyousassmeok // @dindjarinsspouse // @zoeyserpentluck // @summersimmerus // @scarthefangirl // @sheridans-dynamos // @lady-violet // @simsrecs // @xoxobabydolls // @ruvaakke // @simp-legend // @evilcr0ne // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @your-local-simp0 // @elenavampire21 // @pheonixfire777 //

[novaonhere]

Wait, What?

Relationship: Cal Kestis x f!reader

Summary: You’ve been traveling the galaxy with Merrin, taking a stop on Jedha to help Cere. She asks you to go pick up Cal and the Mantis and lead them to their location. Excited seeing each other again, old feelings are brought to light.

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: Fluffy, mild swearing from the author

A/N: Cuties

Prompt: "I ACCIDENTALLY TOLD YOU I LOVED YOU AND NOW WE'RE FINALLY TALKING ABOUT IT.”

(gif not mine)

————————————————————————

You take a step out of the shower. Today drained you. Cere tasked you and Merrin with pushing stormtroopers away from the front entrance of the base, but without killing anyone to lessen suspicion. Merrin used some cool space witch magic that you just had to gawk at from time to time. From teleporting troopers, to creating small, yet blinding sandstorms to push the men back. You’re job was to protect her and provide guidance. A few times you brought up the suggestion of moving rocks, making false pathways that loop them back, etc. Only twice did you have to strike down anyone, but it was nothing you couldn’t handle.

The steam from the shower had fogged up the mirror. You stare at the blurry reflection. Even though you couldn’t see your face clearly, you did notice the prominent dark circles under your eyes. Even after the steaming hot shower, your muscles still didn’t relax. Groaning, you rub your shoulder, turning to grab your freshly cleaned clothes. Standard Jedi uniform. Thank goodness for the breathability. Instead of a regular over-tunic, you placed a familiar poncho over it. Taking a deep breath into the cloth, you sigh, knowing the smell it originally held was long gone.

As you finish getting ready, a loud rapture erupts on the door.

“(Y/N), Cere needs you now.” Merrin calls through the door. You open it immediately, face to face with your friend.

“Do you know what about?” You ask, slipping on your last boot. Merrin nods, taking off at a slight jog down the hall. You follow, grabbing your light saber close to your side.

You both enter the archives, meeting Cere, who’s prime focus was one of the tablets in front of her.

“Ah, (Y/N), I must ask you of something.” Cere smiles, turning to face you two.

“Of course, what is it?” You ask, letting go of your light saber. Something about her smile seemed off, like she knew this was going to be… fun?

“I need you to collect someone from a rendezvous point. Leave at once.” Cere states, handing you a chip with coordinates. You study it from her hand before hesitantly taking it. “We have some friends coming for a visit.” You and Merrin scowl, raising your eyebrows. Merrin’s scowl is a bit harsher, not the most comfortable having to share already a small space with someone else.

“Merrin, please prepare 2-3 guest ro-“

“Cere,” You intervene, holding up your hand for her attention. “Who am I picking up?”

“Just go, young Jedi. You’ll know.” Cere shoos you away. She takes Merrin’s shoulder and leads them back down the hallway. Annoyed, you head towards the hanger to grab a speeder. From the coordinates she gave you, it was quite the journey.

Arriving at the hanger, you spot your ride. Do you remember the name? Absolutely not. This wasn’t normally your jam, big machines and what not. You enjoyed using your feet to travel, not much a speeder without a proper seatbelt nor safety precautions. You throw yourself up and head off into the desert.

—-

You don’t mind waiting, it soothes you to be alone in your thoughts. Finding a nice rock to lean against, you stare far out into the desert, watching troopers march along. Do they even know what they are fighting for? Who they’re hurting? What their future holds if they do or do not succeed? Sighing, you place your head in your hands, with your elbows rested on top of your knees. It’s be awfully hot without the wind. Taking a deep breath, you notice the wind pick up, unnaturally. You jump to your feet, peering around the rock to see a ship…

Your eyes snap open. Is that…

Stepping out of the ship is someone you most definitely recognize. The figure turns around to shout something back and a small droid appears. It runs quickly, climbing up the figure’s back. The figure steps onto the sand as the stairs fold back into the ship. It quickly takes off, most likely for a safer spot to land and hide for awhile.

You haven’t seen that face for many months. A face you would see daily. After meeting Merrin and bonding, you decided it would be safer for the two Jedi’s to split and one to escort Merrin around and teach her the ways around the Galaxy. You couldn’t be happier to assist Merrin, you grew closer; however, you couldn’t help but miss the red head daily.

The man turns towards the rock, looking at something in his hand. Most likely the coordinates, which lead to the rock you are currently hiding behind. Feeling the corners of your lips head up your face, you step out from the rock, the light now shining onto you. Geez it was hot.

He looks up, and drops whatever was in his hand. Time of course did not stop, with the sand moving and the wind blowing your hair, but damn did it feel like it. You stared at each other; one smiling like a lunatic and the other dumbfounded.

“We’ll look who it is on Jedah.” You call out, hands on your hips. He closes his mouth, shaking his head into a grin. “Let’s get a move on before the storm hits.”

“(Y/N)!” He calls out, the grin widening more and more with each step he took towards you. You match his energy, extending your arms out for a long deserved embrace. He wraps his arms around your waist, trying to not pick you up off your feet. He smushes his face into the crook of your neck, taking it all in. You giggle, your arms around his neck and head on his shoulder.

“It’s been too long, Cal.” You breath out, backing out of the hug. He laughs as BD-1 chirps for attention. “Oh I saw you too, buddy, don’t worry.” You pat the droid on his head, which beeps happily.

“Like you said, let’s get a move on.” Cal smiles, extending his bent elbow to you. Chuckling, you slide your arm through, holding onto his bicep. Together, you walk alongside the rocks, down the hill to where you parked your speeder.

“How is everyone?” You ask, trying to find his gaze. His once bright eyes suddenly gloss over, a small and quick frown coating his expression. Your smile fades as well.

“Let’s save the catching up to when we’re at base, is that okay?” He asks, patting your hand on his arm with his other hand. His eyes find yours, his filled with sorrow and weariness. You nod, looking forward.

Just as you were about to turn the corner to where you parked, you both had the sensation to stop. You could feel multiple presences beyond, not friendly presences. Looking at each other, Cal brings a finger to his lips, letting your arm go. You nod, brining your hand to your light saber in case something were to go wrong. Cal peeks around the corner. Multiple storm troopers had surrounded your speeder, taking it apart and looking at the pieces. You come up behind Cal, unsheathing your saber. He does the same, sprinting into action.

You both quickly beat the shit out of them. Cal keeps his saber out, keeping a look out as you tend to the speeder.

“Damn, they took a beating to this.” You sigh, exasperated.

“They probably wanted to make sure to trap whoever was here, you did hide it pretty well. Must have been coincidence that they found it.” Cal reassures you. Nodding, you look to the sky where you hade came from. It was filled with brown darkness. The storm was starting to catch up.

“Crap,” you breathe out. There was no way you’ll make it back to base walking. Looking around, you see a pack of spamel walking away from the storm, fleeing as well. “Come on,” You motion to Cal, jogging towards the pack. He follows closely, also eyeing up the storm.

Upon reaching the spamel, you notice one that has a few spots on its back. Smiling, you recognize this to be the spamel you saved from a few troopers just a week ago. The spamel recognizes you immediately, bending down as if it knows you need to hitch a ride. You turn to Cal, motioning for him to hop on.

He throws his leg over, bracing himself on the back of the spamel’s neck. You hop on as well. Without having time to adjust nor brace, the spamel takes off, causing you to lunge into Cal’s back, throwing your arms around his waist. You hands hold onto his toned stomach, feeling the indentations of scars he has endured. He turns around, smiling at you.

“Alright?” He asks, a small chuckle escaping his lips. The hot desert heat trickles up your neck and onto your cheeks.

“Yeah, I’m alright.” You respond, tightening your grip as the spamel picks up speed.

—-

Periodically, you’ll glance behind you, noticing the storm creeping up onto the herd.

“Cal,” You tap his shoulder. “We’re not going to make it.” He cusses to himself, looking around.

At that moment, the wind picks up, sand flying up the spamel’s legs. The herd whines in fear. Suddenly, Cal lunges forward, pointing a bit to the right.

“There!” He calls out, the wind starting to drown out some sound. The spamel seemed to understand Cal’s gesture and noticed the cave opening, big enough to fit even the tallest spamel. The heard gallops to the entrance. You tighten your grasp onto the man, hiding your face in the poncho to protect your eyes and nose from the sand being kicked up. Cal does the same with his own jacket. A few spamel’s have already made it in, and it seemed like you were the last ones. You check behind to make sure you are in fact that last set as your enter the shelter.

“Cal, help me with the rock.” You call out, jumping off the spamel. He falls off with you, following you towards the entrance. Sand and wind flow into the space, hitting and scaring the spamel. You look to see a large rock to your left. Together, you roll the stone in front of the entrance as a make-shift door. You both sigh, as Cal pats you on the back.

“Good thinking,” He smiles as BD chirps in. “Let’s see if we can get a fire going.” He hurries off as you go around to the resting spamel, checking to see if anyone had gotten hurt.

—-

You sit just as you were before earlier, in your own thoughts. The fire flickers and dances beautifully, creating a warm ambiance to the space. The spamels are fast asleep on one side of the cavern, while you and Cal stare at the fire. He sits with a leg extended out and the other folded in, where he rests his hands.

“So, what happened to the crew?” You finally pipe up. You turn to see his face, which basically glows in the firelight. His freckles decorate his features, something you were always jealous of. His eyes remind fixated on the fire.

“Greez is alright…” He trails off, not wanting to discuss anymore on the subject. You both have lost too much in this war, friends, family, innocents. You scoot closer to the man, wanting to be a positive presence to him. He looks out his peripheral to your figure nudging closer. This makes him smile, a content, warm, inviting smile. You take this as a sign to reach your hand out, asking to be held. He agrees, interlocking his fingers with yours. His hands were strong, durable, beat up, yet soft and warm. You take your hands into your lap, using your other hand to trace over each freckles. You used to do this many times on the Mantis over the years to calm him down. Your eyes stay glued to your connect the dots session, while his scan you. It’s like he’s trying to memorize you, understand you and remember you.

“I missed you too much.” He breathes out. You look up into his eyes, which are melting at the eye contact. You smile, extending your hand to his face. He practically dissolves into your touch as you rest your hand on his cheek.

“I missed you as well.” You respond, a small smile leaving your lips.

“I love when you do that,” He absentmindedly blurts, causing you to giggle. He neck, cheeks, and ears flare up immediately, realizing what he had uttered. “I mean, of course I like you touching me, not like that don’t give me that look, I love our closeness, I love you…” He continues to ramble, but your focus ceased once you heard those three words. You hand slowly falls from his blubbering face, catching his attention.

“Wait,” You whisper, making him shut his mouth. “What?” You cock your head, staring up at him.

Silence. The only noise that could be heard was from the wind outside, the snores of the spamels, the crackling of the fire.

“Cal…” You whisper, your hands retreating to your lap. His upper body begins to redden, realizing what has made you take a moment.

“Did you-“

“Okay yes, I may have accidentally told you I loved you, and I’ve felt like this for awhile but you know the Jedi code but I guess now we’re finally talking about it and what that could mean-“

You chuckle quietly, watching the red head loose his cool. This was a side you’ve never seen before, and honestly, he was quite cute. You rest a hand in his thigh, again, shutting him up.

“Let’s save the catching up to when we’re at base, is that okay?” You repeat his words to you earlier to him. With that you lean your body in closer to him. Regaining his composure, he senses your motives and quickly leans into you as well. You lips meet. At first, very much head on, wanting to be as close together as possible. Just a simple, yet long lingering kiss. You pull away, but he is not satisfied. He places on hand on your thighs, the other around your shoulder to the back of your head, bringing you back in for a longer, deeper kiss.

You both stay there, kissing you feelings away as the fire flickers down. You both don’t notice, nor really care. Your attention is on each other.

You finally pull away for a long, needed breath. He does the same. You both smile, giggling just a tad.

“I didn’t know you felt that way,” You start, sitting up straighter to look at him better. He clears his throat, fixing his collar.

“Well, you know the Jedi code.” He starts, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Cal, you both know the Jedi code is older than time itself and things change.” You giggle. “People change.”

“Well, if that’s the case,” He smiles, bringing his lips to yours once more.

You wait out the storm, falling asleep in each others embrace.

[goosewriting]

Thaw

summary: reader comforts Cal when he has self-doubts.

relationship: Cal Kestis x GN reader

warnings: slight spoilers for Jedi Fallen Order

word count: 1.6k 

A/N: i tried keeping it as vague as possible so as not to spoil too much. eventually i got some things wrong because when i first wrote this i hadn’t finished the game yet and i mix up all the inquisitors anyways lol

(english is not my first language. constructive criticism and grammar corrections are very appreciated!)

— — —

“Start up the ship! I’m on my way!”

That was the last message Cal sent after you informed him that the Empire had gotten to Ilum, and they were after him. Greez, Cere and you are currently in the Mantis’ cockpit, looking out to the snowy landscape, as two Imperial Walkers appear from behind the rocky formations, shooting away from you, possibly at Cal.

Your chest tightens slightly, feeling bad for the poor Jedi; he really needed a break. He finally managed to repair his lightsaber in the caves, and now Stormtroopers are after him yet again. 

After presumably fighting his way out, you finally spot him between the Walkers, running towards you, and you worry at the slight limp you immediately spot. Telling Greez to take off, you go to the ship’s ramp, which is slowly starting to retreat to close the hatch. Cal takes a Force-pushed leap onto it, losing his footing as he lands and he almost falls off, but you grab him by the arm, pulling him inside, and the door closes behind him.

Panting, Cal leans onto the round table as you shake off some snow from his clothes. He’s rambling about the Inquisitors, saying that you need to get to Dathomir as soon as possible to retrieve Cordova’s artefact from the tomb because the Second Sister is hot on his tail. 

Greez assures Cal that he’s already setting course to the red planet, but you interject that before he goes anywhere, he needs rest first. Now that he calmed down a bit you can see his adrenaline is wearing off, and he grimaces in pain as he now feels every sore spot on his body. 

Letting him lean onto your shoulder, you guide him to the back of the ship to sit on the edge of your shared bunk. BD hops onto the little table and beeps worriedly.

“Don’t worry, buddy,” you comfort the droid, as you take off Cal’s poncho and shirt. “He’ll feel better after some rest.”

You stand between Cal’s legs, tending to his injuries. He has a couple of blaster burns on his chest and shoulders, as well as a cut on his temple. You clean everything up and gently apply bacta gel to the wounds, as well as two thin band aids to the cut so it would heal properly. 

“How’s your leg?” you ask him.

“It’s fine, not sprained or anything,” Cal says without meeting your eyes. “I just took an awkward step, is all. I’ll walk it off.”

You merely hum in response, handing him a clean shirt to put on. You stand up to put everything away, and when you’re done you catch Cal just in time as he wants to get up, but you push him back down by his good shoulder.

“Come here,” you speak softly, scooting in behind him and hugging Cal to you, so he’s sitting between your legs with his back to your chest, while you sit against the wall. You make sure not to press on any of his injuries. Finally he seems to relax a little in your hold, and you press a little kiss to his jaw.

With the Empire after you, and all these Inquisitors always sniffing him out somehow… You know Cal feels like it was defeat after defeat. You want to comfort him but you're not sure what to say except for ‘it’s gonna be okay’.

You feel Cal tracing over a relatively fresh wound on your arm with his fingers, as he looks deep in thought. Thanks to Cal, you got very few injuries yourself, this one being from when you two escaped the Wookiee’s home planet.

“This is all my fault,” Cal says suddenly.

“Huh? What is?” you question. He doesn’t answer immediately. 

“When the Second Sister tapped into our comms on Kashyyyk…” he starts, and you don’t like where this is going. “If I had noticed–”

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” you interrupt him. “She played dirty. It’s no one's fault. And certainly not yours.”

“But Cere, if she had told me… I still don't know if I can trust her.”

“She did save us from Bracca, though, didn't she?” you ask rhetorically. 

“… I guess.”

You take his hands in yours.

“Listen, what you need is a nap. You haven't had a break since this whole thing started,” you tell him, and BD beeps affirmatively. “See, even BD agrees! You sir, need a nap.”

“No, there’s no time to waste, I have to–”

“Go to bed is what you have to do. No ‘but’s,” you tell him, trying to sound like it’s final. “Remember what happened to Dathomir before you left? If you want to fight whoever comes your way, you need to rest and properly heal.”

“No, I–”

“Just a nap, Cal,” you insist, moving out from behind him and sitting at the edge of the bed so you can look him in the eyes. “Please. You’re exhausted.”

With you holding his face and looking at him like this, he doesn’t find it in him to fight you or the aching cries of his muscles anymore, so he finally gives in with a sigh. 

“Fine. But wake me up when we get there,” he says.

“I will,” you promise, and guide him to lie back on the bed. When you want to get up, he takes your hand.

“Will you stay with me?” Cal asks in a barely audible whisper. 

“Of course,” you answer just as softly. 

You lie onto your back with him on top of you, his head is on your chest as you run your fingers through his hair. His breathing starts evening out, and your mind drifts off, remembering how you met on Bracca, everything you went through together, all his tales from his time as a Padawan, and your chest tightens. He’s a wonderful person, incredibly resilient, with a heart so kind despite everything, it’s rare to find these days. You also remember that he sometimes forgets these things, so you have to remind him.

“You know you're doing great Cal, right?” you ask after a while in silence, and he lifts his head to look at you. 

“You'll finish Cordova’s mission,” you go on. “And everything will be fine.”

“How can you be so sure?” he asks, wanting to give in but not sure if he should yet. So much can still happen. But you just shrug with a smile.

“I just do,” you assure him. “Trust in the Force, right? I know we both do. It’ll work out.”

Being at a loss for words, Cal leans in, deciding to show his gratitude through a kiss. His lips meet yours and he’s pouring everything into it. And you understand all that he’s trying to communicate.

The kisses slowly start intensifying, and you need to scrape up a lot of self-control to push him off.

“As much as I'm enjoying this, you really need to sleep,” you remind him, slightly out of breath. Cal groans in protest against your neck, giving it a light nip.

“Besides,” you giggle. “I think we have an audience.”

Cal stops and looks up, following your gaze to the side of the bunk where BD is still on the table, looking from you to Cal and back with an inquisitive beep.

“You wanna get in here too, buddy?” you ask the droid and extend an arm, inviting him to join you. BD gives you a happy ‘beep-boop!’ and hops onto the bed.

He’s about to join the cuddle pile when he tilts his head looking at you two. Cal cups your cheek and looks at you lovingly as you smile up at him. BD takes a step back and you hear a shutter, like a picture just got taken. Now your attention is back on the droid. 

“...Did BD just…?” you ask, and Cal sighs.

“You weren’t supposed to hear that,” the redhead grumbles, sending the droid a half-hearted glare.

“Does BD take pictures of us often?” you question him with a chuckle, and an adorable blush spreads on Cal’s freckled face.

“Of you,” he corrects you. 

“...What?”

“For when I'm gone and… miss you. So I can look at you,” he explains, and now it’s your turn to feel the heat prickling your cheeks.

“Can I see them?” you ask after a moment. 

“Hmm, nope.” 

“What do you mean ‘no’? I wanna see!” you whine.

“They're my personal collection, sorry,” Cal says with a cocky grin, and you playfully roll your eyes at him and he laughs. 

Then you’re left in silence again, just looking at each other. Your hand comes up to gingerly trace over the scar on his nose and you can’t help a little smile; it’s your favourite scar of his. Some may say that a scar so evident would be bad or ugly, like an imperfection, but to you it adds to Cal’s handsomeness. It reminds you that despite everything he went through, he’s still here. With you. 

Compared to the boy you met all those years ago on Bracca, he had come so far. Grown so much. Become more confident and powerful.

When Cal raises a questioning brow at you, given your silence and the way you study his face, your hand comes up to the back of his neck, gently pulling him down to place a kiss on the bridge of his nose. Then you pull him back to your chest, and after a while, you can feel him finally dozing off. BD settles down next to you, and you give him a tired, thankful smile. 

“I love you, Cal,” you whisper into his hair after a while. “You’re enough. And I hope one day you’ll realise that.”

[calkestisweek]

Hellloooo, everyone! It's 35 Days Until Cal Kestis Week - a week dedicated to our favorite poncho-loving, cliff-climbing, your-ribs-are-definitely-paste-now-please-get-that-looked-at Jedi!

24 prompts/7 days of art, fic, edits, virtual photography, and MORE for the ever-so deserving Cal Kestis!

Come Join Us on May 12th - 18th 2024!!

I have LINKS

The PROMPT LIST - 6 days, 4 prompts each, with the 7th day as a free/catch up day!

( - and don't worry, you do NOT have to do every prompt or every day. Pick what vibes with you even if that's one day or two prompts combined.)

The FAQ - a non-exhaustive list of questions and answers

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Now, I have RULES

No AI generated text or images will be promoted during this event.

All ships, genres, ratings, and formats are welcome just as long as they’re Cal-centric! (Does not mean Cal-POV, the focus just needs to be Cal.)

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Works posted on tumblr will only be found/reblogged if they use the tag #calkestisweek2024 - that is the only tag being tracked.

[calkestis]

cameron monaghan walked on stage wearing a poncho and then took photos with grogu and i’m supposed to go on with my life like i don’t absolutely NEED to see him as live action cal kestis

the disrespect

[dexthtoyounglings]

I'm Headed To The Mountains

Cal Kestis x Reader Fluff

Summary: You need to rebuild your life. The Empire temporarily stunted it, but they didn't stop it.

GIF NOT MINE!!

•--•

It was one of those nights again. One of those nights where everything seemed beautiful. When the stars shined a little bit brighter and you could see where the sky started to blend into the sun.

You had shuffled on a thick sweater and slipped on one of Cal's ponchos, finding your way on the Bogano grass. It was soft, healthy here. Sure, it often overflowed and was muddy, the water table rarely low. But today, the ground was hard, a sweet Bogano winter where it was never cold enough for snow but cold enough for the ground to chill and the air to dry out.

And the sun setting. Oh, that was your favorite part of the day. The part of the day that told you that you've survived another. Away from the Empire. Away from the corrupt hands of those who snatched your future from the tips of your fingers. You were barely skimming it, the day you had finally won a duel with your master. He was going soft on you--that you had understood. But you had smiled so wide at finally winning.

You realized now that maybe your fingertips hadn't even touched your future as a Jedi, and maybe your nails had grazed it. Before you started biting at them.

Now you fought for your life, the one you weren't supposed to have. Though you, you'd made one of your own. One that neither the Empire nor the Jedi Order would have allowed.

The same life that allowed Cal to sit down next to you, his leg crossing over the other and his hands planting themselves into the hardened dirt behind him.

The same life that allowed your eyes to sparkle when you turned to look at him.

"Maybe we should stay here for the winter," he spoke, head also turning. You never liked the color green too much. But Cal easily changed that for you. He made eye contact with you, and the black of his pupils shed some of the green off his irises while dilating. Maker, his pupils dilated when he saw you. And the way his hair fell into them, tickling his freckles and making his eyebrows twitch in a wince as the tips poked at his eyes momentarily.

You felt out of breath. Like you couldn't speak. Like his beauty was so intense it had snipped your vocal cords and left you a mess, left your lips parted as you stared at him.

"Why?" you asked, voice soft. But if you spoke louder, you might ruin the moment. You might scare him away or blow out the stars that were finally starting to peek through the veil of blue.

The ends of his mouth quirked, crinkling the pale skin beside them. The pink of his lips teased you and poked at your brain in the most endearing way possible.

"Well, I know you like sitting out here and watching the sun set," he pointed out, eyes never leaving yours.

This was your moment. Sure, you had these often, but they belonged to you. The way his eyes smiled belonged to you. The way his lips smiled belonged to you.

You let the silence consume you both. You had no words in return, knowing that Cal didn't mind your quiet. Maker, he wouldn't mind if you never spoke a word to him as long as you kept staring at him like he blended the colors in the sky, like he painted every star, like he set the wind into such a slow motion. He couldn't help it, the way he got so lost in you, and he never seemed to find his way out.

Some days you both were thankful for the Empire. If you weren't allowed to feel this sort of love, you wouldn't be able to handle your hardships as easy. You couldn't imagine a life that didn't allow you to take in his beautiful features like this and feel the tension seep from your body and into the dirt.

You also thanked Cere and Greez for these moments. After a while, it had become apparent that the night started to belong to the both of you. No matter how many times you both meditated and found peace in your minds, Cere could feel the the eye of the storm was found in the bond you shared.

"We could settle down."

Cal's eyes perked at your words. He didn't look any less happy with you, just... shocked. He turned his head to glance at the fading sky. The pink started the disperse into the orange, and at certain angles, the orange melted away.

You cleared your throat softly, "I mean, one day. One day we can find a planet where we can settle down. And we can watch the sunset every night."

Cal looked at you again. And it was silent, but he spoke to you. He spoke through your mind, wordless. You had a force connection, an undeniable one, but even then his words never echoed through your mind. But you knew behind his look, they way his eyes twinkled and the way his body seemed to lean into yours in the slightest.

And we can get married.

•--•

Masterlist

[fanfoolishness]

Cal Kestis headcanons, apropos of nothing:

He crash-landed in the wastes of Bracca after Order 66. Dazed and wounded, his connection to the Force suddenly painful and frightening for the first time in his life, he tried to bury Master Topal — but he couldn’t lift his Lasat master from the escape pod, nor effectively use the Force to hide the pod with stones from the wastes. He was forced to abandon his master again, a guilt he carried with him for many years.

He found his way to the Mining Guild outpost more or less by luck. The Force guided him with a vision of sparks and metal, but he could not see it more clearly, relying more on a feeling than any sense of where he was going. On the outskirts he saw holos about the Jedi’s “betrayal” and cut his Padawan braid with Master Topal’s lightsaber, the last time he would ignite it for several years.

Prauf took one look at the shellshocked kid with muddy, scraggly robes and a fresh blaster wound to the face, and marched him straight to the guild outfitters for new clothes and a job. When the guild rep asked who the kid was Prauf told them he was a distant relative. Very distant. By marriage.

The Scrapper Guild tattoo was mandatory after a week on the job, when it was clear Cal probably wasn’t going to die immediately from the work, and was worth claiming as an worker. A droid stamped the image out onto his forearm in a matter of minutes. It hurt, but it was a distant, muted pain that barely registered. It startled him for weeks when he would catch sight of it. As an adult, the tattoo is an afterthought. He’s considered removing or embellishing it - plenty of backwater tattooists out here on the Rim - but he always winds up leaving it. He’s not ashamed of the time he put in on Bracca, nor the skills he learned there.

He didn’t realize he had a scar for weeks after the fall of the Albedo Brave. They didn’t keep mirrors in the scrappers’ quarters and there was nowhere else to go. He caught sight of his face in a shipside stretch of hammered durasteel on a rare sunny day, and the harsh red line rippling from his neck to his cheek shocked him. He stared at it until he got yelled at, and he got back to work, cheeks flushing with shame.

The scrapper uniform shop included heavy durable ponchos that stood up to the rain and repelled sparks and oil. When the outfitter droid plonked one over his head Cal didn’t argue, even though it was enormous on him. It was far enough from his robes that Cal felt safe and hidden, but close enough that he felt at home. He’s kept one in his wardrobe ever since, and wears them when memories press closer than he’d like.

Cal doesn’t sleep well, even into his twenties; shadowy dreams, sleep talking, night terrors. By the time of Survivor, it’s much better than it used to be: Cere taught him specific meditations he could use to help clear his mind, Greez kept the Mantis stocked with tea that helped him fall asleep faster, and Merrin used to sit up with him if he woke up in a panic. But it’s still his most vulnerable time, and when things are especially hard or emotional, he’s more likely to slip back into the fractured sleep he had throughout his teens.

As a new scrapper he once fell asleep while at a dangerous post, and the foreman screamed at him over it. (Not out of worries for his safety, but because it’d be annoying to find another worker as small and agile on short notice should he plummet to his death.) Prauf found him headphones and a little track player a few days later, told him to blast the music when he needed to stay awake. Every few weeks Prauf just happened to find another track to add to his collection.

[half-truths-and-hyperbole-louk]

Louk's Bad Batch rewatch part 28 omg omg

mid season finale let's go batchersss 🤟

The Bad Batch 2x08

sleepy Wrecker 🤫🤲

Gonky and Echo watching Omega meditate 🥺

Omega asking Echo if he wants to try she was so innocently asking too 🥲

"I don't enjoy solitude" 💔😭

"hey boys" Rex my whole ass heart 🥰💕

lmao gives no details just is like ok meet me on coruscant like it's nbd 💀

how long has it been since they've been there ??

I'm assuming they've been there ?? idk ??

Rex introducing tbb like Cody did 🥲🤲 and Omega's little wave 💕

Echo keeping Omega back from the body, mom

the identifying number being wiped and Tech being the one to comment on not knowing that was a thing.... foreshadowing ? 👀

Echo stepping up immediately to speak in the senate 🥺

Hunter: "the senate won't listen to us, we're deserters" ... who Rampart said died in *his* attack, so the perfect people imo

"a simple data collection" right in the middle of imperial coruscant lololol ily Rex 💕

Chuchi and Omega team up 🥳🙌

they clearly don't think Chuchi is in that much danger bc they let Omega go with her ...

Omega with all her questions 🥺 she's learning everything she can

Omega's face seeing Rampart lmao meeee

he didn't even look at her 🙄

"there's nothing else she can do" HA idiot watch her go actually

Omega's run to look over the edge 🤲

"which one belongs to the clones?" heartbreaking 😫😭

I relate to Chuchi on a personal level, she cares sm about the clones 💕

Bail in dad mode keeping an eye on Omega hehe

Omega's confidence in tbb is so precious 🤲

Senator Burtoni lol blast from the past

the way she looks at Omega makes me uncomfy 👀

she gives zero fks about kamino girlll

"because I'm a clone too... it was my home .... and im angry" YES OMEGA SPEAKING UP FOR HERSELF TO A KAMINOAN I'M SO PROUD 🥳

Wrecker nearly getting zapped 👀

*mission impossible theme plays*

Wreckers saw !! bro I love it !!

Rex helping as many brothers as he can 🥺🤲

mans says he's helped "not enough" brothers... yeah but how many pls

"help's hard to come by these days..." Rex just ask him you know he'll go with you 🥲

"taking a lesson from your squad, we improvise" !!! tcw flashbacks lol I love when they have no plan 💕

knife knife knife 👀

"this is him better" Wrecker you've got this bby !!

lmao Tech controlling the cart from his datapad

Hunter's growl at Tech (again) 👀🤭

sneaky bois shhh 🤫

@anonymous-galager said Tech sounds like Crosshair in this scene hehe

regs: 'ayo someone activated the bridge' tbb + Rex: 'hey boys' they're so unserious while I'm hyperventilating 💀

the clones coming to stop tbb boys !! they're doing it for you !! 😫

Hunter: "new plan. 14, 5, 86" Wrecker: "all of them!?" I will never get tired of their plans 💕 (don't look at me plan 99 I'm not talking about you)

Rex: "we need an exit strategy" Echo: "got one, we're going over them" Rex: 😳 ??

Rex dodging blaster bolts 👌

"this should be interesting" Rex 🤝 Cody saying the same thing about tbb

Tech piloting the escape pod lmao he can literally fly anything

Rampart 🔫😈

lol he really thought he did something 💀

Omega's disguise wearing one of Chuchi's ponchos 🥰💕 Cal Kestis is coming for that poncho 👀

Rex giving Omega the data !! how much they all trust her 🥺

Rampart's whole speech full of rubbish 🙄

Omega catching her breath after running that whole way 🥺 you did good bby 💕

YES CHUCHI PLAY THAT EVIDENCE 🥳

Omega having to relive kamino being destroyed 😭💔

I PANICKED ITS PALPS 🙃

I hate that they twisted the whole thing so bad 😡😡😡

"I was following orders" well well well how the turn tables

the clones taking him away !!! it's like poetry, it rhymes 👌

Chuchi looked so defeated 😭😭😭

Omega hearing the introduction of stormtroopers ... I'm stuck in the foetal position forever 💔😫

Rex hating on palpatine hehe

"the fate of all the clones is now sealed because of us" AND THEY THINK ITS THEIR FAULT I HATE IT HERE 😫😭💔

"I will keep fighting for the clones" me too babes

I thought it was weird tbb just seemed to know Echo would go with Rex but it has taken me this long to realise they probably all discussed it while Omega was taking the data in 🙃😭

each of their lil moments with Echo 🥲

poor Omega probably blames Rex for Echo leaving 💔

"we're a squad" "we need you too" ...when I cry forever 😭

Omega literally jumping into his arms 🥺 and then wiping her tears away *screams into pillow*

the sad clone music I am in spain without the s

"keep an eye on them" ~ mom worrying about the kids

THE CROSSHAIR PARALELLS HELP-

and she's hugging Lula again 💔💔💔💔

I knew it'd be a bad idea to leave it all this close together I am gonna be an absolute wreck watching the s2 finale and going straight into s3 🙃

[hereforthefanficsandromance]

The Way He Looks at You Series II:V

Act II: The Way You Look at Him Chapter 5: The Way You Frustrate Him

Read on AO3 Read on Blogger Read on Tumblr Story Master List: The Way He Looks at You Series

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Chapter Summary

A visit with the physician brings you and Cal closer. Rating: 18+ Words: 2.2K

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The first signs of our previous relationship are showing. Signs, I assume, she will reject. The physician is to arrive today to confirm she is fit to pursue normal activity after her injury and subsequent coma. Doubtful, she is unwell. Part of her memory is missing; she isn’t okay. 

I look forward to speaking with him to resolve this issue. If I can help bring her memory back, the need to prove myself over these next six weeks becomes unnecessary. I am prepared to win her back, but I’d rather guarantee the outcome. To know she is mine and worship her for it. 

She seems interested, physically; it is her loyalty to the Rebellion that forces her denial. Perhaps I should start physical intimacy. Touch her, kiss her hand; as I did the first time we met. She was willing then, and overcome with lust. She was in a different head space; heartbroken, and craving the attention of desire. 

The Jedi causes my blood to boil. He delivered her to me, then stole her from me. I know he isn’t dead, and I stand weak against him at the moment. Every second that passes without her love puts me at risk. 

As I cut Jogan fruit for my Light, I glance at the breakfast I made. It was the same breakfast I had previously cooked that she had enjoyed. I had been hopeful the taste would jog her memory. Unfortunate. I eat my portion in a hurry and toss the rest. 

She exits the bedroom to my relief and walks down the short hallway towards me, still wearing the unfortunate poncho from my old days. I place the fruit on the table, looking into her eyes for approval; she avoids eye contact as she sits. As she picks at the fruit, I finish cleaning the kitchen, wondering if there might be more I can do to push our relationship along. A light above the front door illuminates, alerting me of the physician’s arrival. 

“The doctor is here. I’ll be back in a few minutes for you. Eat what you can while I’m gone.” I say.

She nods once, but I hear the annoyance in her mind. I pass through our front door into the unwelcoming parlor; answering the door to my quarters. The physician, who I have not seen since finding out that my Light was unconscious, looks me over once then picks a spot on the floor to direct his gaze. 

“Thirteenth Brother. A pleasure.” 

“Please enter, Doctor Halaeon.” I say, my expression hardening instinctively.

The nervous balding man steps inside, and I gesture for him to be seated on one of the two opposing couches. I sit opposite, leaning back in my seat, one arm on the backrest, an ankle resting on my knee. 

“Thank you for coming. I apologize that Ms. Kestis fled the hospital upon waking. She was rather distraught.”

The man nods, staring at the coffee table that separates us; I take a deep breath. “I was hoping to speak with you about the reason for her distress before you see her.”

“What seems to be the issue, Inquisitor?” He asks.

“As you know, she suffered severe head trauma, and it seems there’s been a rather unfortunate side effect. One I am hopeful you may have a solution to.” 

This causes the Doctor to meet my eye, the whites of his eyes clearly visible. 

“It appears Ms. Kestis has lost a significant portion of her memory. Everything from the moment I met her to the moment she woke up in the hospital. I expect you to fix it.” 

Doctor Halaeon sits quietly for a moment before speaking, his hands clasped tightly in his lap, not daring to interrupt me. “Inquisitor, I-”

A few shallow breaths and opening and closing his mouth a few times. “I don’t know that we…that I have the power to fix something in this realm. The brain is tricky and often does things we don’t understand.”

“You are a physician, are you not? You fix people. So fix her.” I say. My patience waning. I need her to remember me, to love me again. 

His whole body trembles as he speaks. “I will assess her condition and move forward with treatment, but there is no guaranty I can fix this.” 

I uncross my legs, leaning forward before lowering my voice. “Do whatever it takes.”

He says nothing and I stand. “I’ll fetch her.”

I return through our front door and see that my Light has eaten most of the fruit and is folding the cloth napkin into various shapes that fall apart from the lack of structure. She looks like her old self for a moment, like when I saw her in the restaurant after buying her clothes that first time. I walk around the table to stand behind her; she ignores me. My hand touches down on the back of the chair. 

“Light, the physician is ready to evaluate you. Please follow me into the next room.” 

She says nothing and continues folding, her mind complaining and ranting about my being unreasonable for not wearing the clothes she picked for me. I bite back a smile at her internal fit and place my other hand on the table near her work, leaning down towards her cheek. 

“You know, if you’d like to spend more time folding, I have your folding papers from before your accident. I could get them for you.” 

She swings her head up to look at me; her face inches from my own. Once she realizes the closeness, her cheeks color, and her gaze lowers to my lips before returning to my gaze. 

“But you are required to see the physician first.” 

Her eyebrows furrow, and she returns her attention to folding the napkin. I let out a short laugh and place a kiss along her hairline. 

“You are required to see him either way, but doing so willingly will get you the papers.” 

We both freeze, both realizing what I had just done. I pull away, returning to my full height. 

“I apologize. You seemed like yourself for a moment, and I forgot the nature of our relationship.” 

I offer her my hand. “My offer still stands.” 

She considers for a moment, then rises, ignoring my outstretched hand, but allowing me to guide her towards the parlor. Doctor Halaeon stands to greet her and offers his hand to shake; which she accepts, grasping his hand in both of hers. 

She’s baiting me, and I feel the distinct need to punish her severely for her rebellion. Imagining spending hours on the couch mindlessly edging her while I read, then going to bed without allowing her release. I shake my head once and return to the conversation that began without my involvement. 

The two sit on the same couch and I return to my original seat. I stay quiet, allowing the examination to proceed and listening for any signs that her amnesia might be fixable. My Light is willing, staying in the lines of my request, likely hoping to receive her folding papers. She converses easily with the shaking physician, and he relaxes in her presence. 

I listen carefully through the questions and don’t miss when she rejects having any pregnancy symptoms. Though I’m not terribly worried at this stage, soon she won’t be able to ignore them. Soon she’ll have my child, hopefully a son, in her arms. Both of them smiling up at me each time I enter the room, both demanding my attention at all hours. Perhaps her belly round for a second time with a second child, third child, I suppose.

There is the Jedi’s child that I must unfortunately claim as my own. Everyone is expecting two children, two of my children, not one of mine and the child of a Jedi. There would be an uproar, the child publicly killed, and my Light taken from me for information. Something I would never allow to happen; I would sooner take her to the furthest reaches of the galaxy for safety. Perhaps his child won’t survive the pregnancy, perhaps my son will best his in the womb. 

“What are the odds of both children surviving?” I ask, interrupting their discussion. 

The physician turns to face me. 

“Ms. Kestis appears in good health despite the head injury, so it is safe to assume both children will arrive healthy and safe.”

I nod, disappointed, and they continue their conversation about pregnancy and what to expect. The doctor asks a long series of questions regarding her memory. She dodges the specifics of what she remembers to avoid aligning with the Rebellion, but says she clearly remembers that day. 

He conducts a long series of response test to determine the results of the head injury. He pulls out a needle to draw blood to run additional tests for the pregnancy. I stay mostly calm but my hand reaches for my lightsaber when he misses her vein and has to try again. 

“I apologize. Usually my nursing staff does this portion.” He says.

“It’s okay, you’re doing great.” My Light says. 

She shoots me a warning look, not missing my hand on my lightsaber. I attempt to relax into the seat and glare at the man. He is successful the second time and collects what he needs. As the appointment wraps up, the physician prescribes medication for the pregnancy, which I will send for immediately. 

“I’d like to see her back at the hospital for cognitive testing when you are able. There is only so much I can do out of the office.” Doctor Halaeon says. 

“I will arrange something soon.” 

We exchange pleasantries and the room falls silent as the door closes. I sigh, rolling my tense shoulders up to my ears before dropping them. 

“That went well-” 

“You could have been nicer.” She says. 

I whip around, seeing her arms crossed and glaring at me. “He could have done his job better.” 

“You brought him out here with no additional staff. The poor guy was terrified!” 

“He seemed awfully at ease in your presence.” 

“Are you seriously jealous of me being kind to him after seeing his fear of you?” She says. “I had to work to offset the damage you were doing.” 

“Was that all it was, Light? You were being nice to put him at ease? Not that you had just rejected my hand moments before taking his so easily.” My voice raises a fraction. 

I feel fiery anger in my chest, frustrated by her outburst, furious that she touches others in my presence and I can do nothing to stop it. Anything I do to assert my power will push her further from my reach. She smirks, and I hear in her mind how pleased she is with herself. 

“That’s not my name! My name is-”

I close the distance between us in two steps; she tries to back away, eyes wide, but I catch her shoulders, holding her in place. “Ah, but it is your name, because I have elected to call you by it. Unless you’d prefer Mrs. Kestis.” 

It’s my turn to smirk and her mouth falls open stupidly, struggling to reconcile with being so close to me. I loosen my grip, but not so much that she may escape it. 

“You were a good girl during your appointment, despite your rebellion towards me. You did what I asked and cooperated with the Doctor, so I will give you back your folding papers.” I say.

She looks up into my eyes, her face turning red, her mind repeating things about “good girl” and how I look when I am being stern. So I become more stern, darkening my expression, leaning in, and lowering my voice. 

“You understand that while I love you, I loathe your behavior towards me. You will not reject my touch in place of another. No touch is required when offered, but touch no one else after. Do you understand?” 

“Yes, Cal.” She says, keeping my gaze, pupils dilating.

I release one hand to brush the hair off her face, allowing my touch to graze her ear and travel down to tilt her chin upward. She sucks in a breath, holding it, awaiting my next careful move. I want to kiss her, to push forward with intimacy. But she must ask to be kissed. She must ask for each part of our old relationship. It’s too delicate to risk any missteps. 

“So good.” I muse. 

She swallows and glances at my lips again; her thoughts equal parts hoping I’ll kiss her and scolding herself for the thoughts. I lean in more, lingering until her thoughts believe I will kiss her in this moment, parting my own lips and having a long look at hers. I move with haste; closing the distance, she tilts her head to provide better access, ready to accept me. But I don’t move towards her mouth, but past it, to her ear, leaving her wanting. 

“Good girl.” I whisper. “I have a meeting soon. Let’s get you those folding papers to keep you busy while I’m preoccupied.”

I let her linger against me for a moment, her heart pounding so loud that I can hear it. She exhales out the breath she was holding and nods. I love my actions disappointed her; I love that she now needs me, that she had her hopes up to feel my kiss. Once she is ready, I guide her back into our home. 

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Next Chapter: Coming Soon

Update 02/01/24 •There is lots more content coming soon. •I am taking a few weeks to get my thoughts in order to ensure all four Acts of this story are cohesive and enjoyable. •I am assuming this will take a minimum of four weeks (possibly longer).

What Are You Doing? •Outlining the entire story and solidifying each character and their goals (and much more). •Thoroughly editing all currently posted chapters and adding small bits of new material (nothing huge story line will be changed.) •Plus a secret project that you will never see an announcement for, but maybe if you're lucky, you'll stumble across it in a few weeks. (This message will be deleted by the time it's live)

What Else Can I Read? •I am regularly posting mini series and one shot stories (all Cal centric) •I am also posting Daily Cal Headcanons on my Tumblr

How Can I Help? •Comment/Like/Share/Reblog anything you can to let me know you are still excited about this story and want to see more. •Become an editor/beta reader. Reach out using contact info at the bottom of the post (editor/beta reader link) if interested. I am needing a small team who is interested in helping this, an other, stories grow in a really positive way. I need to know where things feels slow, what does and doesn't work with the plot and characters. (I will remove this portion once I am past the point of return with editing/outlining.)

[sarahmonious]

Day 4 of Cal Kestis Week! Using the prompts: “We shouldn’t be doing this” | Ponchos

Additional Tags: Angst, Psychometry | Force Echo, That's Not How The Force Works, Minor Character Death, Order 66, Star Wars: Jedi: Survivor Spoilers, Post-Star Wars: Jedi: Survivor

Chapter summary:

Oddly enough, he had never considered it before; he was so used to psychometry being a passive ability, the way the Force flowed through him making him a vessel, a tool. But of course, the ability could go both ways. He’d just never had the need to figure out how.

[voxmyriad]

Cal Kestis Week 2024 Day Four: Reacquainted

Prompt: Scars | “We shouldn’t be doing this.” | Bad Ending | Ponchos

✨ALL FOUR✨

Rating: General Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Category: Gen

Fandoms: Star Wars: Jedi: Fallen Order Series (Video Games); Star Wars: Obi-Wan Kenobi (TV)

Characters: Cal Kestis, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Reva Sevander | Third Sister, Darth Vader

Additional Tags: Implied Torture, no actual torture, Reva and Cal were friends in the Temple, Cal also only met Obi-Wan Kenobi in person a couple times, Chapter 2 is the whump part, Chapter 1 is actually quite hopeful

Chapter One: Good Beginning

If someone had asked him, Cal would have said Nur was a terrible idea. They shouldn't be doing that. Nothing good could come of going back there, and nothing could convince him to do it.

Almost nothing, as it turned out.

He heard about it by accident, or coincidence, or just the movements of the Force. On his second visit to Jedha, Cere had pulled him aside and told him one of her contacts on the Hidden Path had reached out with an emergency. A Senator's daughter had been kidnapped by an Inquisitor. They knew nothing about the Fortress Inquisitorius. They needed help that Cere couldn't give...and Cal could.

After his vision on Bogano, Cal couldn't just stand by and let a little girl stay there.

It was another coincidence that he arrived at the briefing just as he heard someone say, "We shouldn't be doing this. No one's ever made it back out."

"Almost no one," he said as he walked in, BD on his back peeking curiously out at the group.

"Who are you?"

Cal opened his mouth to answer, but someone else there beat him to it. "Seriously? How can you not recognize him, Wade? That's Cal Kestis. He's on the Empire's Most Wanted list! The hair, the scars, it's got to be him. He's even wearing the poncho! You are, aren't you?"

"Uh. Yeah," Cal said, a little flustered at being recognized—not that it should have been a surprise. He'd quite literally raced across a billboard with his own face on it, showing his Wanted notice. "I heard you needed help getting into the Fortress. I was there five years ago. Sneaked in, although getting out was a lot, uh, louder. But we can help."

He patted the holotable and BD-1 hopped down and projected his own map of the interior, far more detailed. He'd even kept records of the troops they'd encountered, as Cal had sliced his way through.

"Oh wow. You really have been there. We could never get that kind of intel from the outside. Why were you there?"

"One of the Inquisitors got a holocron. A list of Force-sensitive children."

For the first time, a bearded man in the back made a sound, a strangled sort of gasp. "What happened to it?" The voice was a little rough, but Cal still knew a Coruscanti accent when he heard one, even this far out from the Core. In the Force he was…muted, like a gray veil was drawn across him, but…

"I destroyed it," he said, watching the figure steadily as the others crowded around the holotable to study BD's maps. "I got it back, and I destroyed it. Those children deserve better than to be hunted by the Empire. Like we are."

That sigh told him everything. Cal had felt another flare of surprised recognition when his name had been said, but it had disappeared too quickly for him to figure out where it had come from. Now that he was paying attention—and a lot about this man discouraged paying attention, maybe a little too much—Cal was almost sure he knew who this was.

Everyone else was still occupied, arguing over how they were going to get in, how they would get everyone out again. Cal stepped closer, lowering his voice just in case. "Master Kenobi?"

"Ben," the man said immediately, but Cal had been feeling for it in the Force this time, that brief spark of recognition. Then Ben paused, and finally turned to look at Cal directly for the first time, searching his face curiously. "You were the one Quinlan spoke of."

"Master Vos?" Cal asked, surprised. Quinlan Vos had taught him, just for a few months, only a year or so after he'd arrived at the Temple. He'd been the only one who could teach a young Cal Kestis how to understand and control what he was seeing when he touched things. For a while, Cal had hoped Master Vos would ask him to be his Padawan, and had guiltily harbored a little disappointment when it hadn't happened, but that was all…so long ago now. "Uh���yeah. I must be."

Master Kenobi—Ben—gave him a quiet, tired smile. "I cannot imagine your unique abilities have made navigating this galaxy easier," he said, "but in case you hadn't heard, Quinlan is still alive."

"He is?" Cal's heart lifted. Any news of just one other Jedi still living… "Masters Eno Cordova and Cere Junda are also alive. They're together, they're working to rebuild the Archives."

"Don't tell me anything more," Ben said quickly, but there was a bloom of relief in his eyes before they were both called to the table to help plan.

The trip to Nur wasn't long, but long enough for Ben to sit quietly beside Cal, desert robe folded across his lap. "The Empire's Most Wanted? From what I understand, the Empire is hunting a great many people. More than it would like known about publicly. What exactly did you do to earn a spot on that list?"

"Where do you want me to start?" Cal answered with a wry grin. "That picture they're using is old. Probably from the security cameras the first time I was in the Fortress."

"How did you make it out again, exactly? Your ship?"

"Well…yes and no. Cere and I were facing Vader—"

"Vader?" Ben exclaimed, drawing a few looks from the others. "You've faced him?"

"Yeah. I kinda flooded the place. I guess they fixed it." Cal shrugged, as though surviving Darth Vader was only an irritation, an inconvenience, and not something almost no Jedi have done. "He got me, but my friends took care of me. My friend Merrin got me and Cere out of the water. I remember seeing her magic."

"Her—"

"She's a Nightsister of Dathomir." Then, as Cal watched Ben's face turn wary, he added, "She's family. She's the only one left of her sisters. You'd like her."

"Oh, I'm certain. What makes you say that?" Ben asked skeptically.

Cal grinned. "You're both really good at being sarcastic," he said, and felt a little silent triumph at the startled expression. "Seriously. She's a good friend."

"Well. We've all had to adapt, I suppose." Ben shifted as the ship trilled its warning that they'd exit hyperspace in five minutes. "Did you really destroy that holocron?"

"Cut it in half with my lightsaber. It…I think it was the right thing to do. I wonder sometimes, but—"

"It was." Ben was watching the flow of hyperspace out the window instead, but Cal felt how much he meant his next words. "We need to keep those children safe."

"Yeah. Including the one the Inquisitors have." Cal's hand settled on his lightsaber as the others started getting ready. "What's her name again?"

Ben's fear was beginning to leach into the Force, but he smiled, clearly thinking of her. "Leia. It's Leia."

"Leia," Cal repeated, committing it to memory in case he found her first. "I'm looking forward to meeting her."

Chapter Two: Bad Ending

"Reva?"

***

It was later. He couldn't see. He could feel the tightness of the manacles around his wrists, arms, legs, thighs, head. Something on the chair beneath him was wet. He could smell blood, taste tin. He could hear the faint hum of the electrodes in the chair, dormant, waiting. Distant footsteps. Voices outside the closed door.

Reva's voice, growing louder. "...something for you. A surprise."

"I do not enjoy surprises, Third Sister. You will not distract me. Do not think I will so easily forget your incompetence at allowing Kenobi to escape."

"Not a distraction, just a token. In apology, Lord Vader. A Jedi. It's not Kenobi, but still one I think you've wanted for a long time."

He heard the door open. He heard slow, firm footsteps on the grating. He felt the temperature drop in the room. The swirl of cold in the Force that accompanied Vader everywhere he went.

He heard the breathing.

There was a long, horrible pause.

"Kestis." Vader drew it out, adding sibilance, as if savoring the name. "You have done well to capture this one. Keep him alive. Do not let him escape. When I return…he will accompany me to Mustafar."

"Of course, Lord Vader."

Cal could hear the swirl of Vader's cape in the stillness, feel the air move, the pressure in the room dropping again as that presence moved away.

Then a hand. Fingertips on his jaw, so sudden and gentle as to be shocking. There was nowhere to move, but he jerked aside anyway, gritting his teeth against the flaring of pain.

"Why you?"

Reva. Reva's voice, low and angry and wracked with guilt and pain Cal knew she couldn't afford, as an Inquisitor.

"Why did it have to be you? You got out of here once, you got away from him, and you came back."

The hand slid down to his throat and squeezed. Cal's hands balled into fists—but her grip released him and she just rested her hand there, against his pulse.

"I can't. He'll kill me and then it's all wasted. I can't save you."

Cal swallowed against a sandpaper throat, licked cracked lips. "You…put me…here."

"I know. And you have to stay. I can't explain why." He heard a little laugh, just a chuckle, just like she used to do in the Temple. She'd always been so serious. "You'll probably die here. Maybe it'll even be a mercy. But he won't take you anywhere."

"Reva."

He felt the warmth that was her leaning closer. She needed to. His voice was barely making it past his lips. "Trilla…" he managed, and felt her jolt of surprise in the Force. "She…wanted…to stop…he k-killed her for it…and Masana…I set her free too…you can…still go back…"

No answer, but he knew she hadn't left. Her finger traced along the blaster scar on his neck. He wished, recklessly and with the intensity of knowing his life wasn't long now, he wished he could tell her how he'd gotten them. About Master Tapal, about Prauf, Cere, Cordova, BD, Greez, Merrin, Bode. His people, his family, the one he'd found after he'd lost Reva and Caleb.

"She wanted…Trilla…she said, 'avenge us'..."

"I know." Now Reva sounded like she had before, cool and calm with that edge of disdain. "Sit tight, Jedi. I'm sure someone will be along soon."

The hand withdrew, leaving his neck cold from the lack of contact. He heard her boots on the grating. "Reva," he tried again, hoarse, barely more than a whisper. He'd told himself he wouldn't scream, but everyone screamed eventually.

The door slid shut.