#cal kestis needs a poncho

[animatedjen]

Cal Kestis | Jedi Fallen Order

[mabsart]

[Jedi : Fallen Order]

Second play through doodle dump.

I was worried it would loose some of its luster now that I already knew what to expect but I had an even BETTER time. (There’s so much in game interaction between Merrin and Greez that I missed the first time and they’re such a funny pair.)

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being another displaced Padawan with Cal Kestis

Cal Kestis x jedi!reader

warnings: angst, STAR WARS JEDI SURVIVOR SPOILERS

a/n:

prompt:

you and cal went way back

like, jedi padawan back

so after the purge, about five years later, you guys reunited by chance. thanks to cere junda, no less

and, god, seeing someone so familiar after trying to get by on your own, someone who knew the feeling of the trajectory of your life being thrown off before you were ready, that wasn’t easy to come by

“you’re here” -cal

“i’m here” -you

“we survived” -cal

“just barely” -you

cere was delighted that the two of you could have lifted each other’s spirits so much, which was very much needed in desperate times, as you two were just given a very important mission by a former jedi master in your order

you and cal kicked some serious ass together, helping one another relearn old lessons your masters had taught during your youth

“i think running across walls was the hardest thing i was ever taught” -you

“it took me forever to get that right! i could only get two steps in before i plummeted to the floor!” -cal

you shared a lot of stories and emotions during travels, in private

and not all of them were positive, but this was the first chance you’d had in five years to face these emotions, to air out your feelings

“do you miss the clones? i was so fond of our battalion, they were always so kind to me” -you

“i think…i think that was the worst part. the people who defended us in battle, gave me pep talks before training, always there, that same face at every turn suddenly behind the blaster that was meant to put me down” -cal

“i miss them” -you

cal and you had your missions together…and separately. you’d be on one planet and he on the other, trying to race the empire and inquisitors to the holocron

“it could happen all over again” -you

“it could be the key to saving the galaxy” -cal

“or we’d be creating a generational tragedy” -you

“so would the empire” -cal

“you’ve got me there” -you

cal gifting you ponchos from his travels (lol)

“any chance you like pink?” -cal

“well…” -you

braving zeffo alone while you knew cal was somewhere far more dangerous, you had a bad feeling about it

but your teachings from the order were always the same, no attachment. mission first, feelings second…no, last

but on cal’s adventure, he found merrin, a nightsister from dathomir

you hadn’t seen any nightsisters since ventress, which did happen to make you feel a bit off

“cal…you sure?” -you

“trust me, y/n. things have changed. merrin is just like us” -cal

“cal told me much about you. another survivor. a pleasure” -merrin

you and merrin grew quite close actually

she was truly spectacular, and swapping stories with her was sort of educational

“wait…the jedi responsible for the nightsister genocide? you said lightsabers, plural? how many?” -you

“four” -merrin

“two green, two blue?” -you

“precisely. how did you know?” -merrin

“hang on, no way—” -cal

“my master killed him shortly before we were split up…when the clones turned” -you

“grevious? really? master kenobi finally got him?” -cal

“who is this ‘grevious?’” -merrin

“general grevious, he was a separatist general—a cyborg. he wasn’t a jedi, he stole lightsabers from his kills. he ordered the attack on your home” -cal

“i’m so sorry, merrin” -you

you three were still healing from many scars, but doing it together was much more achievable than trying alone

it was a wonder you even made it to fortress inquisitorius

you, cal, cere. all three of you fought like hell to save those kids.

now, cal and you, you two had much different perspectives than say, cere or trilla

displaced padawans. little guidance. cal was barely old enough to even be a padawan learner, but times were desperate and the order called upon the youngling to start quite early. you were in a similar boat. it made you two see eye to eye better than most

trilla, a padawan with much more training and insight, one who was failed by the order that she was most loyal to. failed by her own master.

cere, a devout jedi master who failed many people who were counting on her. who lost herself to a side of herself that every jedi is supposed to fight.

and just before any resolution could come of all of you together, the famed and feared darth vader showed himself

and the sinking feeling you felt before he arrived froze you

“what is it, y/n? y/n?” -cere

*ominous breathing sounds*

you shook off the feeling, fleeing instead

cal and you were split up when you swore vader made a point to hold you back

“run cal! get out of here!” -you

“y/n l/n, i was hoping i would see you” -vader “where is obi-wan?!”

“i thought you were dead” -you

“is that what he told you?” -vader

“you’re going to kill me to get back at him? i haven’t seen him since the purge, anakin! i left!” -you

“there is no anakin!” -vader “did you leave, or did he leave you?”

“are you just going to let cal get away?” -you

“he can’t get far” -vader

“my journey is not important to you” -you

“you are like me, y/n. obi-wan failed us. these inquisitors are weak, impressionable, disposable. but i know how you think. i know how he thinks. i give you the opportunity to join me. fight with me.” -vader

“i saw the holotapes, anakin. i saw what you did to the younglings and i will not let you do it again. we are not alike, obi-wan did not fail me. i took a page out of ahsoka’s book, i found my own path. and it is not beside you.” -you

“this is not over, y/n. i trust you’ll find your way out” -vader, force pushing you off a ledge

you did find you way back out and merrin was quick to save you before going back for cal

you were left completely unharmed, as well, which was quite the surprise to everyone else

“what happened back there, y/n?” -cal

“nothing i’d like to relive” -you

cal nodded and let it go, focusing on the holocron floating before you all

your mind kept replaying memories as they discussed what to do with it

memories of anakin’s massacre. vader’s speech. younglings you couldn’t save. luke and leia somewhere across the galaxy. the inquisitors.

“destroy it.” -you

in one quick swipe, cal took his lightsaber to the glowing blue cube. no questions asked

and from there on, it was no longer about the order. you remembered why you left in the first place. the purge, the politics, your master couldn’t contain himself. your troops turned their blasters on you. everything you were taught was bantha fodder. and you were just a padawan

it was now about disassembling. scaring the people in power while giving the little guy some hope.

“this is a much better gig than obi-wan playing by the rules” -you

“from what you told me, him and anakin never played by the rules” -cal

the name made you shudder, but you pushed past it

“well, anakin was known as the rulebreaker. obi-wan always tried to reel him in. but, i’ve noticed a rule or two that master kenobi had bent” -you

“anakin has a padawan too, right?” -cal

“he did. she was also a rule breaker. when she left the order, i almost followed her. last i heard, she went to mandalore with half of the 501st. i, uh—” -you

“right…” -cal

you were still haunted from the encounter on nurr. still hadn’t told cal and it was eating you up inside.

but the fighting made it feel better

dismantling, stealing, helping

and then merrin left. and cere. and greez settled down. and you and cal were just two makeshift jedi knights with your tragic pasts and your need to keep your place in the galaxy

and keep each other close

but not too close

those rules you followed, the one’s obi-wan followed, you threw them out a long time ago. the jedi order was corrupt. you examined each council master postmortem and decided that they were all flawed despite their rank. you hated them for it.

but decided the one teaching you would follow would be to lose hate, a step to the dark side.

you didn’t really even know at this point, what was the difference between right and wrong anymore

cal and you continued fighting. joined up with saw gerrera. never left each other’s sides

which…sparked feelings you’d never really been taught or told how to deal with

only aversion, really. but it wasn’t like you didn’t really talk about it

“i don’t really see the problem with it. look at everything else we do, that’s not exactly the jedi way” -you

“it’s dangerous” -cal

“love is dangerous?” -you

“attachment is” -cal

“i figured you already had attachments. we were all a crew before this” -you

“i let them all go” -cal

“and you’d let me go?” -you

you began constantly questioning these ways and trying to fight for a new future with cal, without pressing too hard

but it was hard to ignore those feelings and harder to constantly be denied by your old life

and it was harder when the new crew always teased you two

“come on, kestis. if you don’t, i will” -gabs

“yeah, just go for it. who’s it hurting?” -bravo

“i’m just not ready to go there” -cal

you were more bothered than you let on

but you always put the mission first

up until your trip back to coruscant

“this is just a reminder of how little it all matters now. there’s no one left.” -you

“that’s why it matters” -cal

the intensity of this mission made it so it was just the two of you again

and maybe that would spark something…but you doubted it

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[novaonhere]

Wait, What?

Relationship: Cal Kestis x f!reader

Summary: You’ve been traveling the galaxy with Merrin, taking a stop on Jedha to help Cere. She asks you to go pick up Cal and the Mantis and lead them to their location. Excited seeing each other again, old feelings are brought to light.

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: Fluffy, mild swearing from the author

A/N: Cuties

Prompt: "I ACCIDENTALLY TOLD YOU I LOVED YOU AND NOW WE'RE FINALLY TALKING ABOUT IT.”

(gif not mine)

————————————————————————

You take a step out of the shower. Today drained you. Cere tasked you and Merrin with pushing stormtroopers away from the front entrance of the base, but without killing anyone to lessen suspicion. Merrin used some cool space witch magic that you just had to gawk at from time to time. From teleporting troopers, to creating small, yet blinding sandstorms to push the men back. You’re job was to protect her and provide guidance. A few times you brought up the suggestion of moving rocks, making false pathways that loop them back, etc. Only twice did you have to strike down anyone, but it was nothing you couldn’t handle.

The steam from the shower had fogged up the mirror. You stare at the blurry reflection. Even though you couldn’t see your face clearly, you did notice the prominent dark circles under your eyes. Even after the steaming hot shower, your muscles still didn’t relax. Groaning, you rub your shoulder, turning to grab your freshly cleaned clothes. Standard Jedi uniform. Thank goodness for the breathability. Instead of a regular over-tunic, you placed a familiar poncho over it. Taking a deep breath into the cloth, you sigh, knowing the smell it originally held was long gone.

As you finish getting ready, a loud rapture erupts on the door.

“(Y/N), Cere needs you now.” Merrin calls through the door. You open it immediately, face to face with your friend.

“Do you know what about?” You ask, slipping on your last boot. Merrin nods, taking off at a slight jog down the hall. You follow, grabbing your light saber close to your side.

You both enter the archives, meeting Cere, who’s prime focus was one of the tablets in front of her.

“Ah, (Y/N), I must ask you of something.” Cere smiles, turning to face you two.

“Of course, what is it?” You ask, letting go of your light saber. Something about her smile seemed off, like she knew this was going to be… fun?

“I need you to collect someone from a rendezvous point. Leave at once.” Cere states, handing you a chip with coordinates. You study it from her hand before hesitantly taking it. “We have some friends coming for a visit.” You and Merrin scowl, raising your eyebrows. Merrin’s scowl is a bit harsher, not the most comfortable having to share already a small space with someone else.

“Merrin, please prepare 2-3 guest ro-“

“Cere,” You intervene, holding up your hand for her attention. “Who am I picking up?”

“Just go, young Jedi. You’ll know.” Cere shoos you away. She takes Merrin’s shoulder and leads them back down the hallway. Annoyed, you head towards the hanger to grab a speeder. From the coordinates she gave you, it was quite the journey.

Arriving at the hanger, you spot your ride. Do you remember the name? Absolutely not. This wasn’t normally your jam, big machines and what not. You enjoyed using your feet to travel, not much a speeder without a proper seatbelt nor safety precautions. You throw yourself up and head off into the desert.

—-

You don’t mind waiting, it soothes you to be alone in your thoughts. Finding a nice rock to lean against, you stare far out into the desert, watching troopers march along. Do they even know what they are fighting for? Who they’re hurting? What their future holds if they do or do not succeed? Sighing, you place your head in your hands, with your elbows rested on top of your knees. It’s be awfully hot without the wind. Taking a deep breath, you notice the wind pick up, unnaturally. You jump to your feet, peering around the rock to see a ship…

Your eyes snap open. Is that…

Stepping out of the ship is someone you most definitely recognize. The figure turns around to shout something back and a small droid appears. It runs quickly, climbing up the figure’s back. The figure steps onto the sand as the stairs fold back into the ship. It quickly takes off, most likely for a safer spot to land and hide for awhile.

You haven’t seen that face for many months. A face you would see daily. After meeting Merrin and bonding, you decided it would be safer for the two Jedi’s to split and one to escort Merrin around and teach her the ways around the Galaxy. You couldn’t be happier to assist Merrin, you grew closer; however, you couldn’t help but miss the red head daily.

The man turns towards the rock, looking at something in his hand. Most likely the coordinates, which lead to the rock you are currently hiding behind. Feeling the corners of your lips head up your face, you step out from the rock, the light now shining onto you. Geez it was hot.

He looks up, and drops whatever was in his hand. Time of course did not stop, with the sand moving and the wind blowing your hair, but damn did it feel like it. You stared at each other; one smiling like a lunatic and the other dumbfounded.

“We’ll look who it is on Jedah.” You call out, hands on your hips. He closes his mouth, shaking his head into a grin. “Let’s get a move on before the storm hits.”

“(Y/N)!” He calls out, the grin widening more and more with each step he took towards you. You match his energy, extending your arms out for a long deserved embrace. He wraps his arms around your waist, trying to not pick you up off your feet. He smushes his face into the crook of your neck, taking it all in. You giggle, your arms around his neck and head on his shoulder.

“It’s been too long, Cal.” You breath out, backing out of the hug. He laughs as BD-1 chirps for attention. “Oh I saw you too, buddy, don’t worry.” You pat the droid on his head, which beeps happily.

“Like you said, let’s get a move on.” Cal smiles, extending his bent elbow to you. Chuckling, you slide your arm through, holding onto his bicep. Together, you walk alongside the rocks, down the hill to where you parked your speeder.

“How is everyone?” You ask, trying to find his gaze. His once bright eyes suddenly gloss over, a small and quick frown coating his expression. Your smile fades as well.

“Let’s save the catching up to when we’re at base, is that okay?” He asks, patting your hand on his arm with his other hand. His eyes find yours, his filled with sorrow and weariness. You nod, looking forward.

Just as you were about to turn the corner to where you parked, you both had the sensation to stop. You could feel multiple presences beyond, not friendly presences. Looking at each other, Cal brings a finger to his lips, letting your arm go. You nod, brining your hand to your light saber in case something were to go wrong. Cal peeks around the corner. Multiple storm troopers had surrounded your speeder, taking it apart and looking at the pieces. You come up behind Cal, unsheathing your saber. He does the same, sprinting into action.

You both quickly beat the shit out of them. Cal keeps his saber out, keeping a look out as you tend to the speeder.

“Damn, they took a beating to this.” You sigh, exasperated.

“They probably wanted to make sure to trap whoever was here, you did hide it pretty well. Must have been coincidence that they found it.” Cal reassures you. Nodding, you look to the sky where you hade came from. It was filled with brown darkness. The storm was starting to catch up.

“Crap,” you breathe out. There was no way you’ll make it back to base walking. Looking around, you see a pack of spamel walking away from the storm, fleeing as well. “Come on,” You motion to Cal, jogging towards the pack. He follows closely, also eyeing up the storm.

Upon reaching the spamel, you notice one that has a few spots on its back. Smiling, you recognize this to be the spamel you saved from a few troopers just a week ago. The spamel recognizes you immediately, bending down as if it knows you need to hitch a ride. You turn to Cal, motioning for him to hop on.

He throws his leg over, bracing himself on the back of the spamel’s neck. You hop on as well. Without having time to adjust nor brace, the spamel takes off, causing you to lunge into Cal’s back, throwing your arms around his waist. You hands hold onto his toned stomach, feeling the indentations of scars he has endured. He turns around, smiling at you.

“Alright?” He asks, a small chuckle escaping his lips. The hot desert heat trickles up your neck and onto your cheeks.

“Yeah, I’m alright.” You respond, tightening your grip as the spamel picks up speed.

—-

Periodically, you’ll glance behind you, noticing the storm creeping up onto the herd.

“Cal,” You tap his shoulder. “We’re not going to make it.” He cusses to himself, looking around.

At that moment, the wind picks up, sand flying up the spamel’s legs. The herd whines in fear. Suddenly, Cal lunges forward, pointing a bit to the right.

“There!” He calls out, the wind starting to drown out some sound. The spamel seemed to understand Cal’s gesture and noticed the cave opening, big enough to fit even the tallest spamel. The heard gallops to the entrance. You tighten your grasp onto the man, hiding your face in the poncho to protect your eyes and nose from the sand being kicked up. Cal does the same with his own jacket. A few spamel’s have already made it in, and it seemed like you were the last ones. You check behind to make sure you are in fact that last set as your enter the shelter.

“Cal, help me with the rock.” You call out, jumping off the spamel. He falls off with you, following you towards the entrance. Sand and wind flow into the space, hitting and scaring the spamel. You look to see a large rock to your left. Together, you roll the stone in front of the entrance as a make-shift door. You both sigh, as Cal pats you on the back.

“Good thinking,” He smiles as BD chirps in. “Let’s see if we can get a fire going.” He hurries off as you go around to the resting spamel, checking to see if anyone had gotten hurt.

—-

You sit just as you were before earlier, in your own thoughts. The fire flickers and dances beautifully, creating a warm ambiance to the space. The spamels are fast asleep on one side of the cavern, while you and Cal stare at the fire. He sits with a leg extended out and the other folded in, where he rests his hands.

“So, what happened to the crew?” You finally pipe up. You turn to see his face, which basically glows in the firelight. His freckles decorate his features, something you were always jealous of. His eyes remind fixated on the fire.

“Greez is alright…” He trails off, not wanting to discuss anymore on the subject. You both have lost too much in this war, friends, family, innocents. You scoot closer to the man, wanting to be a positive presence to him. He looks out his peripheral to your figure nudging closer. This makes him smile, a content, warm, inviting smile. You take this as a sign to reach your hand out, asking to be held. He agrees, interlocking his fingers with yours. His hands were strong, durable, beat up, yet soft and warm. You take your hands into your lap, using your other hand to trace over each freckles. You used to do this many times on the Mantis over the years to calm him down. Your eyes stay glued to your connect the dots session, while his scan you. It’s like he’s trying to memorize you, understand you and remember you.

“I missed you too much.” He breathes out. You look up into his eyes, which are melting at the eye contact. You smile, extending your hand to his face. He practically dissolves into your touch as you rest your hand on his cheek.

“I missed you as well.” You respond, a small smile leaving your lips.

“I love when you do that,” He absentmindedly blurts, causing you to giggle. He neck, cheeks, and ears flare up immediately, realizing what he had uttered. “I mean, of course I like you touching me, not like that don’t give me that look, I love our closeness, I love you…” He continues to ramble, but your focus ceased once you heard those three words. You hand slowly falls from his blubbering face, catching his attention.

“Wait,” You whisper, making him shut his mouth. “What?” You cock your head, staring up at him.

Silence. The only noise that could be heard was from the wind outside, the snores of the spamels, the crackling of the fire.

“Cal…” You whisper, your hands retreating to your lap. His upper body begins to redden, realizing what has made you take a moment.

“Did you-“

“Okay yes, I may have accidentally told you I loved you, and I’ve felt like this for awhile but you know the Jedi code but I guess now we’re finally talking about it and what that could mean-“

You chuckle quietly, watching the red head loose his cool. This was a side you’ve never seen before, and honestly, he was quite cute. You rest a hand in his thigh, again, shutting him up.

“Let’s save the catching up to when we’re at base, is that okay?” You repeat his words to you earlier to him. With that you lean your body in closer to him. Regaining his composure, he senses your motives and quickly leans into you as well. You lips meet. At first, very much head on, wanting to be as close together as possible. Just a simple, yet long lingering kiss. You pull away, but he is not satisfied. He places on hand on your thighs, the other around your shoulder to the back of your head, bringing you back in for a longer, deeper kiss.

You both stay there, kissing you feelings away as the fire flickers down. You both don’t notice, nor really care. Your attention is on each other.

You finally pull away for a long, needed breath. He does the same. You both smile, giggling just a tad.

“I didn’t know you felt that way,” You start, sitting up straighter to look at him better. He clears his throat, fixing his collar.

“Well, you know the Jedi code.” He starts, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Cal, you both know the Jedi code is older than time itself and things change.” You giggle. “People change.”

“Well, if that’s the case,” He smiles, bringing his lips to yours once more.

You wait out the storm, falling asleep in each others embrace.

[electrikworm]

Things Cal Kestis has Issues with: Hazardous Chemicals

Relationships: Greez & Cal Kestis

Content Warnings: Chemical Burns (mentioned)

Summary:

Greez learns of the worrying way the scrapper guild prevented outbreaks of parasites among their workers.

Word count: 2’028

Read on Ao3

Chapter Text

“Hey, Greez,” Cal's voice comes from beside the Latero, tearing him away from his cooking, “Where's your Sani-Alk?”

“Sani-Alk?” Greez huffs, dropping the knife he'd been using to stare at the Jedi. “Kid, the day I let someone bring Sani-Alk on the Mantis is the day I've dropped dead.” The mere thought that Cal assumed Greez must use that vile chemical is highly insulting. It's the absolute worst kind of industrial cleaner you can get your hands on. Anyone using it is either a miserable cheapskate that doesn't care about the condition of their equipment or a fool. It's the kind of stuff that has more safety warnings plastered on its label than anything else on the market. The only benefit it has is coming at a low cost.

“Okay, okay, I was just asking.” Cal raises his hands defensively, laughing somewhat awkwardly. Greez can't help but notice that whilst Cal's removes his harness and boots, he's still wandering about in dirty clothes. “What alternatives have you got?”

Thinking for a moment, Greez crosses his arms in front of his chest. He knows he's got heavy duty cleaner, knows what it looks like and where it's stored too, but he's forgotten the name. “It's with the tools for hull repairs. Semi-clear white plastic with pink liquid inside. Can't miss it.”

“Thanks,” Cal says, clasping his hands together, already turning to leave.

“Wait,” Greez calls after him, “what do you need industrial cleaner for anyway?”

Cal trudges back, leaning forwards to look back into the kitchen from the corridor. “Had to swim through some dirty water and I'm not convinced there weren't all kinds of parasites floating about in it,” Cal says.

Greez's mind leaps to the most logical conclusion. “So you're gonna wash BD?”

“Later, I'm cleaning myself first.”

Pausing, Greez inhales deeply. “I swear Cal, if you're going to tell me that you plan to use a highly aggressive chemical cleaner on your own skin, then I might just have an aneurysm.”

The way Cal goes still, glancing off to the side, tells Greez everything he needs to know.

“Are you crazy? You know the damage that could cause?” Greez snaps, perhaps a little too harshly, whilst pointing a finger at Cal.

The Jedi's face twists into annoyance and insult as he takes a step towards Greez. “I'm not stupid Greez, I know what I'm doing!”

“And what is that exactly? Please enlighten me on what you possibly want to achieve.” Dread has settles in Greez's stomach. He doesn't like where this conversation is going at all. Most of all because Cal really isn't stupid, so he must have picked this idea up somewhere. Greez gets the awful feeling he knows exactly where.

“I already told you, I'm trying to kill off anything that might have got on me in that water.” Cal stands there stiffly, arms at his side as he clenches his hands. It looks like he's trying to make himself look larger than he is. If he were still wearing his poncho, it might have been more effective. With out it, it's very blatant just how thin the human is.

“There are better ways to deal with parasites, kid,” Greez sighs.

Shoulder's hunching, Cal's face falls a little. He almost seems to shrink a few inches as his stature changes. “It's what we did on Bracca.”

Pure sabacc, Greez had guessed right. Not that it was a hard guess. Every few days they seem to learn of some new concerning fact that had been part of Cal's day to day life on Bracca.

“Sit,” Greez says, indicating one of the chairs around the kitchen table. Cal hesitates.

“I'm dirty,” he mumbles. It's always worrying when he gets so quiet.

“Doesn't matter, I'll clean later if I have to.” Greez watches Cal as he slowly does as asked, moving to sit on the chair with his hands resting on his knees after turning it to face Greez. The Latero leans against the counter, lower arms crossed. The vegetables he'd been cutting have been momentarily forgotten. "Now tell me, why'd you use kark like Sani-Alk to deal with parasites on Bracca?" Greez waits quietly, hoping Cal knows he only needs to share as much as he feels comfortable talking about. Cal shrugs, rotating the chair left and right a little as he thinks. "It's what the guild did. If there were any signs of parasite outbreaks among the workers, everyone had to do a once over with the stuff." Greez hums, watching Cal closely as he talks. Where the Jedi had been so certain earlier, when he'd told Greez what he needed the chemical for, he seemed unsure now. Questioning what he's previously accepted as fact has shaken Cal, making him sound like he barely even believes what he's saying. "Why not just use sonics? Surely that'd be cheaper and safer," Greez says, running a hand across his hair to distract from the anger that's started bubbling up at more information about Cal's previous workplace coming up. Cal laughs. The sound is hollow, almost entirely humourless. "We didn't have access to sonics. The parts didn't come to Bracca new, best case you could scrape one together from a ship wreck." Cal pauses, pushing his hair out of his face. It looks damp from the body of water the Jedi swam through earlier. "Not worth the risk doing that. A faulty sonic is damaging at best, deadly in the worst cases. Once heard reports of an apartment complex that advertised it's above standard facilities and charged almost double the credits in rent that's sonics failed. Gave off the wrong frequency of vibration and killed four through brain damage." Greez freezes up. He'd never thought about what would happen if a sonic malfunctioned. He'll have to run the diagnostic over theirs soon, just to be sure. "So what? They hosed you down with chemicals instead?" That gets an almost genuine snort out of Cal. "No, they'd have us shower with it." When Greez says nothing, Cal continues. "They'd sort us into groups of around twenty and lead us into the first of two room. There we'd shower with the chemical. You'd let it do its thing for a few minutes, then go to the next room and rinse it off. You'd be allowed to wear a rebreather throughout of course, but how you kept your eyes safe was your own issue." Sighing, Greez runs a hand across his face. Everything that just came out of Cal's mouth must violate at least a dozen health regulations. "And doing all that didn't burn you?" Cal shakes his head. "They diluted it. Worst you got was your skin being itchy for the next week, but it got rid of parasites every time." Greez wishes they could have the Jedi checked over at a medcenter, just to make sure there'd been no unseen damage to his body over his years on Bracca. But that's not an option they have. He's about to continue asking questions when Cal cuts in again. "But there was one time where they karked the dilution." Cal's waving a hand about casually, like he's about to share some amusing anecdote and not a recount of a serious risk to his health. Greez already knows that's he's going to hate the whole thing. "The stuff started burning the moment it hit your skin. When the overseer's noticed, they did actually start hosing us down, but with water. It still got all over my shoulders and back, bit of my head too. Part of my hair fell out after that, so I shaved it. Grew back right though, so no harm done." Cal laughs, touching the back of his neck with his hand like he's remembering. Knowing the guild, Cal barely got time off work to heal. Imagining him there, climbing wreckages in Bracca's either unbearably hot or uncomfortably wet weather whilst severely burned makes Greez feel a little queasy.

“How old were you?”

Cal hesitates again. “Think I was around fifteen.”

Greez doesn't even have the words to voice his hatred for the whole situation, for the guild. A kid that age shouldn't even have been working, let alone being exposed to such harsh chemicals and forced to work injured.

“I don't want to hear of you ever doing something like that again, got it? Just use the sonic.” The statement comes out a little accusatory, but Greez hopes Cal doesn't take it the wrong way.

“Will that be enough?”

“Should be,” Greez says. “If you're still worried after, we'll figure something out that doesn't involve hazardous chemicals.” Smiling, Greez tries to put the Jedi at ease. Cal still looks a bit off when he nods and hops off the seat, wandering off. A little while later, Greez hears the sonic running.

Wiping down the chair Cal sat on, just to rid it of any potential bits of drying mud, Greez returns to bustling about the kitchen. It serves as a good distraction from the concern. Greez didn't used to have such problems. All he had to worry about in the past was game strategies and the credits he had to finance his favourite pastime. Now he had other people to worry about, and his mind seems to treat doing so like a constant necessity. Greez would still take this over before any day. He was barely more than a hollow husk back then, desperately trying to cram the void in his chest with gambling and pointless distractions.

Greez does wish Cal would stop acting like making the Latero worry is his day job though. That would make his life a hell of a lot easier.

When Cal returns, he's wearing fresh clothes. The shirt is borrowed from Cere, the shorts used to belong to Greez, though they're significantly longer on the Latero than on Cal. Both items of clothing weren't worn often and as such, echo free according to Cal. Still, Greez makes a mental note to find Cal some of his own clothes soon. How tightly Cal has to draw the strings keeping his shorts up makes Greez feel bad, and not just cause the clothes fit badly.

BD-1 trails behind Cal, evidently done charging. He looks clean as well, so Cal must have gotten to that too.

“Almost done cooking, why don't you sit down whilst you wait.”

Cal's still too quiet for Greez's liking when he obliges. BD hops up onto the counter, settling near Cal and chattering away in binary. Normally, Greez would remind them that he doesn't want droids tracking dirt across his kitchen surfaces, but since BD's freshly washed and Cal's not holding up too well, Greez doesn't have the heart to do so. Greez offers Cal something to drink, but he declines.

When the food is simmering as it should, Greez sits down next to Cal. The Jedi is hunched, right hand resting on the table and tapping a rhythm with his pointer finger. Thanks to the short sleeves, Greez can see bruises forming around Cal's elbow.

“How you holding up?” Greez asks. Cal keeps staring off into the distance.

“Fine,” he says. Greez doesn't believe him.

“If you need to talk more, I can listen,” Greez offers, leaning forwards a little to try and catch Cal's eyes. BD-1 trills, making Greez wish he'd finally brush up his binary.

What ever BD says makes Cal smile. “Thanks,” he says, glancing over at Greez.

“For what it's worth, I'm sorry Cal.” Greez isn't good at this, apologizing is all he can think to do.

“Don't be,” Cal responds, and silence falls across the two again.

Not wanting to force anything, Greez leaves Cal to decide if he wants to talk. The Jedi keeps being quiet and withdrawn, making Greez question if he'd done something wrong.

But once Cal eats, he starts livening up a bit more, sharing what he'd been doing out and about with BD earlier. Greez still doesn't find his handling of the situation good, regretting not calling Cere for help, but at least his food seems to help improve Cal's mood somewhat. For the moment, it'll have to do.

[calkestisweek]

Hellloooo, everyone! It's 35 Days Until Cal Kestis Week - a week dedicated to our favorite poncho-loving, cliff-climbing, your-ribs-are-definitely-paste-now-please-get-that-looked-at Jedi!

24 prompts/7 days of art, fic, edits, virtual photography, and MORE for the ever-so deserving Cal Kestis!

Come Join Us on May 12th - 18th 2024!!

I have LINKS

The PROMPT LIST - 6 days, 4 prompts each, with the 7th day as a free/catch up day!

( - and don't worry, you do NOT have to do every prompt or every day. Pick what vibes with you even if that's one day or two prompts combined.)

The FAQ - a non-exhaustive list of questions and answers

The AO3 COLLECTION - currently locked, will be unlocked May 11th

The ASK BOX - got a question? comment? concern? Don't be shy!

Now, I have RULES

No AI generated text or images will be promoted during this event.

All ships, genres, ratings, and formats are welcome just as long as they’re Cal-centric! (Does not mean Cal-POV, the focus just needs to be Cal.)

Any previews of art, fic, or other media will only be reblogged if they are SFW.

All works must be tagged with the appropriate ships and warnings.

If you are posting fanfiction on tumblr, any words beyond the first 500 must be under “read more.”

Works posted on tumblr will only be found/reblogged if they use the tag #calkestisweek2024 - that is the only tag being tracked.

[abigailspinach]

(for the fic rec ask meme) 18. 😭 A fic that ripped your heart out (but it hurt so good)

I might have to answer this ask multiple times. I have some buried down in the book marks that need rereading. 😍 🥹 😭

I immediately thought of Atlanta Archmage… (@drgeektoyou)

There are a couple of their fics that get me my right in the feels. “Pursuit” is so good but has action adventure too “Waking Hours, Walking Shadow” is so good and gets into Cal’s Zeffo vision. I have reread it a bunch cause it just really hits and who doesn’t late night chats over tea.

But for this prompt I will go with “Splinter” packs a punch!!!! 🥹

Chapters: 1/1

Fandom: Star Wars: Jedi: Fallen Order Series (Video Games), Star Wars - All Media Types

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Cere Junda & Cal Kestis

Characters: Cal Kestis, Cere Junda, BD-1 (Star Wars)

Additional Tags: Cal Kestis Week 2024, Post-Star Wars: Jedi: Fallen Order, Canon Compliant, Missing Scene, Jedi as Found Family (Star Wars), Goodbyes

Series: Part 4 of Facets - Cal Kestis Week 2024

Summary:

Scars | “We shouldn’t be doing this.” | Bad Ending (?) | Ponchos

Cere is packed. It needs to be done. But that doesn't make the leaving any easier.

“But the one thing that comes through loud and clear is a bitter sense of betrayal. Despite every long conversation, every late-night tea session, every heart-to-heart they’ve had, Cal just doesn’t seem to understand why all her things are packed up in a neat pile next to the Mantis. She’s told him a hundred times in a hundred different ways… she’s tired. Her heart isn’t in the fight anymore. There’s so much more she can be doing for the galaxy other than just slaughtering every poor soul in white armour that the Empire throws at them. There’s no lasting victory in another dead stormtrooper. No legacy. No honour.

Cal can’t see it.”

[fanfoolishness]

Cal Kestis headcanons, apropos of nothing:

He crash-landed in the wastes of Bracca after Order 66. Dazed and wounded, his connection to the Force suddenly painful and frightening for the first time in his life, he tried to bury Master Topal — but he couldn’t lift his Lasat master from the escape pod, nor effectively use the Force to hide the pod with stones from the wastes. He was forced to abandon his master again, a guilt he carried with him for many years.

He found his way to the Mining Guild outpost more or less by luck. The Force guided him with a vision of sparks and metal, but he could not see it more clearly, relying more on a feeling than any sense of where he was going. On the outskirts he saw holos about the Jedi’s “betrayal” and cut his Padawan braid with Master Topal’s lightsaber, the last time he would ignite it for several years.

Prauf took one look at the shellshocked kid with muddy, scraggly robes and a fresh blaster wound to the face, and marched him straight to the guild outfitters for new clothes and a job. When the guild rep asked who the kid was Prauf told them he was a distant relative. Very distant. By marriage.

The Scrapper Guild tattoo was mandatory after a week on the job, when it was clear Cal probably wasn’t going to die immediately from the work, and was worth claiming as an worker. A droid stamped the image out onto his forearm in a matter of minutes. It hurt, but it was a distant, muted pain that barely registered. It startled him for weeks when he would catch sight of it. As an adult, the tattoo is an afterthought. He’s considered removing or embellishing it - plenty of backwater tattooists out here on the Rim - but he always winds up leaving it. He’s not ashamed of the time he put in on Bracca, nor the skills he learned there.

He didn’t realize he had a scar for weeks after the fall of the Albedo Brave. They didn’t keep mirrors in the scrappers’ quarters and there was nowhere else to go. He caught sight of his face in a shipside stretch of hammered durasteel on a rare sunny day, and the harsh red line rippling from his neck to his cheek shocked him. He stared at it until he got yelled at, and he got back to work, cheeks flushing with shame.

The scrapper uniform shop included heavy durable ponchos that stood up to the rain and repelled sparks and oil. When the outfitter droid plonked one over his head Cal didn’t argue, even though it was enormous on him. It was far enough from his robes that Cal felt safe and hidden, but close enough that he felt at home. He’s kept one in his wardrobe ever since, and wears them when memories press closer than he’d like.

Cal doesn’t sleep well, even into his twenties; shadowy dreams, sleep talking, night terrors. By the time of Survivor, it’s much better than it used to be: Cere taught him specific meditations he could use to help clear his mind, Greez kept the Mantis stocked with tea that helped him fall asleep faster, and Merrin used to sit up with him if he woke up in a panic. But it’s still his most vulnerable time, and when things are especially hard or emotional, he’s more likely to slip back into the fractured sleep he had throughout his teens.

As a new scrapper he once fell asleep while at a dangerous post, and the foreman screamed at him over it. (Not out of worries for his safety, but because it’d be annoying to find another worker as small and agile on short notice should he plummet to his death.) Prauf found him headphones and a little track player a few days later, told him to blast the music when he needed to stay awake. Every few weeks Prauf just happened to find another track to add to his collection.

[kokoa707]

Documenting the evolution of my Cal Kestis' cosmetic choices and headcanon, #4

(or is it a diary at this point?)

After cleaning up, Cal was sent on another desert mission with Merrin. She gallantly protected us and did her desert ghost thing while Cal enjoyed his favorite pastime—that is to say, eavesdropping on random patrols.

He did pull his weight at the end (even if they're both kind of ignoring BD's contribution, excuse me). I was fairly neutral towards Merrin at first, but they work well together and she's wonderfully dependable. She's also the only one who's managed to bring a more playful side out of him, and make him smile consistently with her wry little remarks. It's very sweet. 🙂‍↕️

After that, Greez begged us to visit Coruscant. Also, they're terrible bullies. And liars.

So, Cal changed. He wore bright orange in order to make himself more visible in the traffic, because he's jumping and somersaulting all over the place and he's not crazy (I feel bad for the drivers in Coruscant. Also, I don't trust them).

After that, we finally went back to Koboh aaand I can't believe my best girl Zee was kidnapped. Cal briefly went into Pyloon to see if there was more intel to gather before heading out, and realized that everyone in there is gay for Merrin (very understandable) and he has serious competition. Also, no pressure, Monk somehow managed to tell him that Zee is his favorite droid on like 3 different occasions within 5 minutes. This has nothing to do with Cal's fashion choices, I just needed it in writing.

But yeah, we hurried to the swamp. Poncho time again, who knows what's in the sludge there. It's a good thing Cal owns, like, 20. And that Merrin chose to stay at the outpost, so she doesn't see him.

After quickly realizing that the filthy bog water was getting all over his hair and how gross that was, he tied it up. We met a bogling who looked so traumatized, the poor darling—I wish we could have adopted him. This baby has seen things and needs help.

Then we went on to clean up some of the sewers since we were dressed for the occasion. All in a day's work. I feel that we need a mask, who knows what Cal is breathing in. It can't be healthy.

[half-truths-and-hyperbole-louk]

Louk's Bad Batch rewatch part 28 omg omg

mid season finale let's go batchersss 🤟

The Bad Batch 2x08

sleepy Wrecker 🤫🤲

Gonky and Echo watching Omega meditate 🥺

Omega asking Echo if he wants to try she was so innocently asking too 🥲

"I don't enjoy solitude" 💔😭

"hey boys" Rex my whole ass heart 🥰💕

lmao gives no details just is like ok meet me on coruscant like it's nbd 💀

how long has it been since they've been there ??

I'm assuming they've been there ?? idk ??

Rex introducing tbb like Cody did 🥲🤲 and Omega's little wave 💕

Echo keeping Omega back from the body, mom

the identifying number being wiped and Tech being the one to comment on not knowing that was a thing.... foreshadowing ? 👀

Echo stepping up immediately to speak in the senate 🥺

Hunter: "the senate won't listen to us, we're deserters" ... who Rampart said died in *his* attack, so the perfect people imo

"a simple data collection" right in the middle of imperial coruscant lololol ily Rex 💕

Chuchi and Omega team up 🥳🙌

they clearly don't think Chuchi is in that much danger bc they let Omega go with her ...

Omega with all her questions 🥺 she's learning everything she can

Omega's face seeing Rampart lmao meeee

he didn't even look at her 🙄

"there's nothing else she can do" HA idiot watch her go actually

Omega's run to look over the edge 🤲

"which one belongs to the clones?" heartbreaking 😫😭

I relate to Chuchi on a personal level, she cares sm about the clones 💕

Bail in dad mode keeping an eye on Omega hehe

Omega's confidence in tbb is so precious 🤲

Senator Burtoni lol blast from the past

the way she looks at Omega makes me uncomfy 👀

she gives zero fks about kamino girlll

"because I'm a clone too... it was my home .... and im angry" YES OMEGA SPEAKING UP FOR HERSELF TO A KAMINOAN I'M SO PROUD 🥳

Wrecker nearly getting zapped 👀

*mission impossible theme plays*

Wreckers saw !! bro I love it !!

Rex helping as many brothers as he can 🥺🤲

mans says he's helped "not enough" brothers... yeah but how many pls

"help's hard to come by these days..." Rex just ask him you know he'll go with you 🥲

"taking a lesson from your squad, we improvise" !!! tcw flashbacks lol I love when they have no plan 💕

knife knife knife 👀

"this is him better" Wrecker you've got this bby !!

lmao Tech controlling the cart from his datapad

Hunter's growl at Tech (again) 👀🤭

sneaky bois shhh 🤫

@anonymous-galager said Tech sounds like Crosshair in this scene hehe

regs: 'ayo someone activated the bridge' tbb + Rex: 'hey boys' they're so unserious while I'm hyperventilating 💀

the clones coming to stop tbb boys !! they're doing it for you !! 😫

Hunter: "new plan. 14, 5, 86" Wrecker: "all of them!?" I will never get tired of their plans 💕 (don't look at me plan 99 I'm not talking about you)

Rex: "we need an exit strategy" Echo: "got one, we're going over them" Rex: 😳 ??

Rex dodging blaster bolts 👌

"this should be interesting" Rex 🤝 Cody saying the same thing about tbb

Tech piloting the escape pod lmao he can literally fly anything

Rampart 🔫😈

lol he really thought he did something 💀

Omega's disguise wearing one of Chuchi's ponchos 🥰💕 Cal Kestis is coming for that poncho 👀

Rex giving Omega the data !! how much they all trust her 🥺

Rampart's whole speech full of rubbish 🙄

Omega catching her breath after running that whole way 🥺 you did good bby 💕

YES CHUCHI PLAY THAT EVIDENCE 🥳

Omega having to relive kamino being destroyed 😭💔

I PANICKED ITS PALPS 🙃

I hate that they twisted the whole thing so bad 😡😡😡

"I was following orders" well well well how the turn tables

the clones taking him away !!! it's like poetry, it rhymes 👌

Chuchi looked so defeated 😭😭😭

Omega hearing the introduction of stormtroopers ... I'm stuck in the foetal position forever 💔😫

Rex hating on palpatine hehe

"the fate of all the clones is now sealed because of us" AND THEY THINK ITS THEIR FAULT I HATE IT HERE 😫😭💔

"I will keep fighting for the clones" me too babes

I thought it was weird tbb just seemed to know Echo would go with Rex but it has taken me this long to realise they probably all discussed it while Omega was taking the data in 🙃😭

each of their lil moments with Echo 🥲

poor Omega probably blames Rex for Echo leaving 💔

"we're a squad" "we need you too" ...when I cry forever 😭

Omega literally jumping into his arms 🥺 and then wiping her tears away *screams into pillow*

the sad clone music I am in spain without the s

"keep an eye on them" ~ mom worrying about the kids

THE CROSSHAIR PARALELLS HELP-

and she's hugging Lula again 💔💔💔💔

I knew it'd be a bad idea to leave it all this close together I am gonna be an absolute wreck watching the s2 finale and going straight into s3 🙃

[hereforthefanficsandromance]

ARCHIVED

The Way He Looks at You Series II:V

Act II: The Way You Look at Him Chapter 5: The Way You Frustrate Him

Read on AO3 Read on Blogger Read on Tumblr Story Master List: The Way He Looks at You Series

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Chapter Summary

A visit with the physician brings you and Cal closer. Rating: 18+ Words: 2.2K

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The first signs of our previous relationship are showing. Signs, I assume, she will reject. The physician is to arrive today to confirm she is fit to pursue normal activity after her injury and subsequent coma. Doubtful, she is unwell. Part of her memory is missing; she isn’t okay. 

I look forward to speaking with him to resolve this issue. If I can help bring her memory back, the need to prove myself over these next six weeks becomes unnecessary. I am prepared to win her back, but I’d rather guarantee the outcome. To know she is mine and worship her for it. 

She seems interested, physically; it is her loyalty to the Rebellion that forces her denial. Perhaps I should start physical intimacy. Touch her, kiss her hand; as I did the first time we met. She was willing then, and overcome with lust. She was in a different head space; heartbroken, and craving the attention of desire. 

The Jedi causes my blood to boil. He delivered her to me, then stole her from me. I know he isn’t dead, and I stand weak against him at the moment. Every second that passes without her love puts me at risk. 

As I cut Jogan fruit for my Light, I glance at the breakfast I made. It was the same breakfast I had previously cooked that she had enjoyed. I had been hopeful the taste would jog her memory. Unfortunate. I eat my portion in a hurry and toss the rest. 

She exits the bedroom to my relief and walks down the short hallway towards me, still wearing the unfortunate poncho from my old days. I place the fruit on the table, looking into her eyes for approval; she avoids eye contact as she sits. As she picks at the fruit, I finish cleaning the kitchen, wondering if there might be more I can do to push our relationship along. A light above the front door illuminates, alerting me of the physician’s arrival. 

“The doctor is here. I’ll be back in a few minutes for you. Eat what you can while I’m gone.” I say.

She nods once, but I hear the annoyance in her mind. I pass through our front door into the unwelcoming parlor; answering the door to my quarters. The physician, who I have not seen since finding out that my Light was unconscious, looks me over once then picks a spot on the floor to direct his gaze. 

“Thirteenth Brother. A pleasure.” 

“Please enter, Doctor Halaeon.” I say, my expression hardening instinctively.

The nervous balding man steps inside, and I gesture for him to be seated on one of the two opposing couches. I sit opposite, leaning back in my seat, one arm on the backrest, an ankle resting on my knee. 

“Thank you for coming. I apologize that Ms. Kestis fled the hospital upon waking. She was rather distraught.”

The man nods, staring at the coffee table that separates us; I take a deep breath. “I was hoping to speak with you about the reason for her distress before you see her.”

“What seems to be the issue, Inquisitor?” He asks.

“As you know, she suffered severe head trauma, and it seems there’s been a rather unfortunate side effect. One I am hopeful you may have a solution to.” 

This causes the Doctor to meet my eye, the whites of his eyes clearly visible. 

“It appears Ms. Kestis has lost a significant portion of her memory. Everything from the moment I met her to the moment she woke up in the hospital. I expect you to fix it.” 

Doctor Halaeon sits quietly for a moment before speaking, his hands clasped tightly in his lap, not daring to interrupt me. “Inquisitor, I-”

A few shallow breaths and opening and closing his mouth a few times. “I don’t know that we…that I have the power to fix something in this realm. The brain is tricky and often does things we don’t understand.”

“You are a physician, are you not? You fix people. So fix her.” I say. My patience waning. I need her to remember me, to love me again. 

His whole body trembles as he speaks. “I will assess her condition and move forward with treatment, but there is no guaranty I can fix this.” 

I uncross my legs, leaning forward before lowering my voice. “Do whatever it takes.”

He says nothing and I stand. “I’ll fetch her.”

I return through our front door and see that my Light has eaten most of the fruit and is folding the cloth napkin into various shapes that fall apart from the lack of structure. She looks like her old self for a moment, like when I saw her in the restaurant after buying her clothes that first time. I walk around the table to stand behind her; she ignores me. My hand touches down on the back of the chair. 

“Light, the physician is ready to evaluate you. Please follow me into the next room.” 

She says nothing and continues folding, her mind complaining and ranting about my being unreasonable for not wearing the clothes she picked for me. I bite back a smile at her internal fit and place my other hand on the table near her work, leaning down towards her cheek. 

“You know, if you’d like to spend more time folding, I have your folding papers from before your accident. I could get them for you.” 

She swings her head up to look at me; her face inches from my own. Once she realizes the closeness, her cheeks color, and her gaze lowers to my lips before returning to my gaze. 

“But you are required to see the physician first.” 

Her eyebrows furrow, and she returns her attention to folding the napkin. I let out a short laugh and place a kiss along her hairline. 

“You are required to see him either way, but doing so willingly will get you the papers.” 

We both freeze, both realizing what I had just done. I pull away, returning to my full height. 

“I apologize. You seemed like yourself for a moment, and I forgot the nature of our relationship.” 

I offer her my hand. “My offer still stands.” 

She considers for a moment, then rises, ignoring my outstretched hand, but allowing me to guide her towards the parlor. Doctor Halaeon stands to greet her and offers his hand to shake; which she accepts, grasping his hand in both of hers. 

She’s baiting me, and I feel the distinct need to punish her severely for her rebellion. Imagining spending hours on the couch mindlessly edging her while I read, then going to bed without allowing her release. I shake my head once and return to the conversation that began without my involvement. 

The two sit on the same couch and I return to my original seat. I stay quiet, allowing the examination to proceed and listening for any signs that her amnesia might be fixable. My Light is willing, staying in the lines of my request, likely hoping to receive her folding papers. She converses easily with the shaking physician, and he relaxes in her presence. 

I listen carefully through the questions and don’t miss when she rejects having any pregnancy symptoms. Though I’m not terribly worried at this stage, soon she won’t be able to ignore them. Soon she’ll have my child, hopefully a son, in her arms. Both of them smiling up at me each time I enter the room, both demanding my attention at all hours. Perhaps her belly round for a second time with a second child, third child, I suppose.

There is the Jedi’s child that I must unfortunately claim as my own. Everyone is expecting two children, two of my children, not one of mine and the child of a Jedi. There would be an uproar, the child publicly killed, and my Light taken from me for information. Something I would never allow to happen; I would sooner take her to the furthest reaches of the galaxy for safety. Perhaps his child won’t survive the pregnancy, perhaps my son will best his in the womb. 

“What are the odds of both children surviving?” I ask, interrupting their discussion. 

The physician turns to face me. 

“Ms. Kestis appears in good health despite the head injury, so it is safe to assume both children will arrive healthy and safe.”

I nod, disappointed, and they continue their conversation about pregnancy and what to expect. The doctor asks a long series of questions regarding her memory. She dodges the specifics of what she remembers to avoid aligning with the Rebellion, but says she clearly remembers that day. 

He conducts a long series of response test to determine the results of the head injury. He pulls out a needle to draw blood to run additional tests for the pregnancy. I stay mostly calm but my hand reaches for my lightsaber when he misses her vein and has to try again. 

“I apologize. Usually my nursing staff does this portion.” He says.

“It’s okay, you’re doing great.” My Light says. 

She shoots me a warning look, not missing my hand on my lightsaber. I attempt to relax into the seat and glare at the man. He is successful the second time and collects what he needs. As the appointment wraps up, the physician prescribes medication for the pregnancy, which I will send for immediately. 

“I’d like to see her back at the hospital for cognitive testing when you are able. There is only so much I can do out of the office.” Doctor Halaeon says. 

“I will arrange something soon.” 

We exchange pleasantries and the room falls silent as the door closes. I sigh, rolling my tense shoulders up to my ears before dropping them. 

“That went well-” 

“You could have been nicer.” She says. 

I whip around, seeing her arms crossed and glaring at me. “He could have done his job better.” 

“You brought him out here with no additional staff. The poor guy was terrified!” 

“He seemed awfully at ease in your presence.” 

“Are you seriously jealous of me being kind to him after seeing his fear of you?” She says. “I had to work to offset the damage you were doing.” 

“Was that all it was, Light? You were being nice to put him at ease? Not that you had just rejected my hand moments before taking his so easily.” My voice raises a fraction. 

I feel fiery anger in my chest, frustrated by her outburst, furious that she touches others in my presence and I can do nothing to stop it. Anything I do to assert my power will push her further from my reach. She smirks, and I hear in her mind how pleased she is with herself. 

“That’s not my name! My name is-”

I close the distance between us in two steps; she tries to back away, eyes wide, but I catch her shoulders, holding her in place. “Ah, but it is your name, because I have elected to call you by it. Unless you’d prefer Mrs. Kestis.” 

It’s my turn to smirk and her mouth falls open stupidly, struggling to reconcile with being so close to me. I loosen my grip, but not so much that she may escape it. 

“You were a good girl during your appointment, despite your rebellion towards me. You did what I asked and cooperated with the Doctor, so I will give you back your folding papers.” I say.

She looks up into my eyes, her face turning red, her mind repeating things about “good girl” and how I look when I am being stern. So I become more stern, darkening my expression, leaning in, and lowering my voice. 

“You understand that while I love you, I loathe your behavior towards me. You will not reject my touch in place of another. No touch is required when offered, but touch no one else after. Do you understand?” 

“Yes, Cal.” She says, keeping my gaze, pupils dilating.

I release one hand to brush the hair off her face, allowing my touch to graze her ear and travel down to tilt her chin upward. She sucks in a breath, holding it, awaiting my next careful move. I want to kiss her, to push forward with intimacy. But she must ask to be kissed. She must ask for each part of our old relationship. It’s too delicate to risk any missteps. 

“So good.” I muse. 

She swallows and glances at my lips again; her thoughts equal parts hoping I’ll kiss her and scolding herself for the thoughts. I lean in more, lingering until her thoughts believe I will kiss her in this moment, parting my own lips and having a long look at hers. I move with haste; closing the distance, she tilts her head to provide better access, ready to accept me. But I don’t move towards her mouth, but past it, to her ear, leaving her wanting. 

“Good girl.” I whisper. “I have a meeting soon. Let’s get you those folding papers to keep you busy while I’m preoccupied.”

I let her linger against me for a moment, her heart pounding so loud that I can hear it. She exhales out the breath she was holding and nods. I love my actions disappointed her; I love that she now needs me, that she had her hopes up to feel my kiss. Once she is ready, I guide her back into our home. 

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Next Chapter: Coming Soon

Update 02/01/24 •There is lots more content coming soon. •I am taking a few weeks to get my thoughts in order to ensure all four Acts of this story are cohesive and enjoyable. •I am assuming this will take a minimum of four weeks (possibly longer).

What Are You Doing? •Outlining the entire story and solidifying each character and their goals (and much more). •Thoroughly editing all currently posted chapters and adding small bits of new material (nothing huge story line will be changed.) •Plus a secret project that you will never see an announcement for, but maybe if you're lucky, you'll stumble across it in a few weeks. (This message will be deleted by the time it's live)

What Else Can I Read? •I am regularly posting mini series and one shot stories (all Cal centric) •I am also posting Daily Cal Headcanons on my Tumblr

How Can I Help? •Comment/Like/Share/Reblog anything you can to let me know you are still excited about this story and want to see more. •Become an editor/beta reader. Reach out using contact info at the bottom of the post (editor/beta reader link) if interested. I am needing a small team who is interested in helping this, an other, stories grow in a really positive way. I need to know where things feels slow, what does and doesn't work with the plot and characters. (I will remove this portion once I am past the point of return with editing/outlining.)

[selfshiplightning]

𝐃𝐚𝐲 𝟕: 𝐀𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞; 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲

Are the two of you in matching pajamas while watching a movie in bed? Take out for dinner and an impromptu dancing in the kitchen vibe? Helping the other with their skincare routine? Cuddles while wrapped in a wam and fluffy blanket?

the stormchaser (nea's ship) is her home, and what could be more domestic than teaching cal how to fly it?

"And that's your main throttle, secondary, and hyperspace control center," Nea hummed, pointing over Cal's shoulder. She was leaning against the back of his chair, words soft near his temple. Did she need to be wrapped around the back of the pilot's chair in order to teach him to fly the Stormchaser? No. Could she keep her hands off of him for literally two seconds? Also no.

"Are you sure you about this?" Cal asked, voice wavering as he panned over the array of buttons, levers, and throttles available to him. The Force betrayed his nervousness, uncertainty rolling off him in waves as he surveyed the task ahead of him.

"Greez wants you to fly the Mantis now. If you want to learn, you need to start here. The Stormchaser is heavier and more difficult to maneuver. If you can learn to fly her, you can fly anything," Nea encouraged him, wrapping her arms around his chest in a hug from behind. His poncho was soft under her fingers, the skin of his cheek warm as she pressed a gentle kiss there.

He relaxed against her hold, leaning his head back until it rested on her shoulder, that flighty anxiety replaced with the warm spread of trust as Cal tilted his chin up ever so slightly, asking for a proper kiss. Nea grinned - she spoiled him a bit, but she couldn't help it. Not when he was so sweet. She cupped his jaw, trailing her fingers into his soft hair as she dove into the kiss, hoping he could feel just how much she believed in him. Of course he could - but this was also an easy way for him to try and get out of flying lessens, as he made a sweet noise and deepened the kiss, licking against the seam of her lips to ask for entry.

She pulled back with a chiding noise, chuckling under her breath. "You're not getting out of it that easy, Kestis."

"Kriff," he huffed under his breath, pouting a little as Nea laughed at him, carding through his hair and pressing a chaste kiss to his temple.

"Dork. Don't worry so much about it. I'll be right here, and if you need any more help, you have psychometry. Here - hand on the ignition. What do you see?"

Cal was gifted with psychometry, the ability to sense echoes in the Force, memories that an object held within it over time. It was a precious gift that very few possessed, especially not to the extent that Cal did. She was sure that sitting in the pilot's seat, with his hands resting on the controls, he would be able to catch some glimpses of her pilot, Taen, and maybe absorb some of the Nautolan's confidence with the fight maneuvers.

Instead, as Cal placed his palm on the starter, his brow scrunched together, and after a pause, he laughed, opening his eyes and offering Nea the widest, brightest smile.

"It's you!" he chuckled, gesturing towards the ship. "I can feel it - you running to the pilot's seat, fumbling for the start code - you were anxious, worried something might go wrong-"

Nea gasped, mouth falling open as she stared at him. "That must have been the day I got the ship!"

"I don't think I've ever seen you so nervous," Cal looked at her in wonder - in clarity, even. Like he was seeing her in a different way - and he loved her all the more for it.

Meanwhile, she was blushing still. "Well, I had a right to be nervous - I was being chased by a bunch of angry pirates."

"You were - oh, yeah," Cal brushed his hands over the console and Nea assumed he uncovered more of the story. "One of them shot right here-"

"In the corner of the hyperdrive computer. Yeah, that was fun," Nea snorted. "I had never flown anything bigger than a starfighter. This thing was massive and clunky and half broken by the time I got it going - no thanks to those assholes. Sore losers."

Nea huffed and rolled her eyes, and Cal leaned back, head pillowed against her shoulder again.

"What do you mean, sore losers?"

"Well, I won this ship in a game of sabacc," Nea grinned down at him, carded through his hair again, just to feel how soft it was and to watch his lashes flutter as he preened at the touch. "The guy who bet it wasn't too happy.

"You're good at sabacc?" Cal asked, smiling up at her, and Nea grinned, devilish.

"I'm good at hustling sabacc. The Force lends itself to that."

"Let me guess - they didn't like that you cheated?" Cal laughed, shaking his head even as he looked up at her. "You're lucky you got out of there in one piece."

"I know. It's why I love this ship - and why it's important you learn how to fly it," Nea urged, pressing another brief kiss to his lips before she finally pulled away, settling into the cop-pilot's seat. "Now come on - let's go!"

[voxmyriad]

Cal Kestis Week 2024 Day Four: Reacquainted

Prompt: Scars | “We shouldn’t be doing this.” | Bad Ending | Ponchos

✨ALL FOUR✨

Rating: General Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Category: Gen

Fandoms: Star Wars: Jedi: Fallen Order Series (Video Games); Star Wars: Obi-Wan Kenobi (TV)

Characters: Cal Kestis, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Reva Sevander | Third Sister, Darth Vader

Additional Tags: Implied Torture, no actual torture, Reva and Cal were friends in the Temple, Cal also only met Obi-Wan Kenobi in person a couple times, Chapter 2 is the whump part, Chapter 1 is actually quite hopeful

Chapter One: Good Beginning

If someone had asked him, Cal would have said Nur was a terrible idea. They shouldn't be doing that. Nothing good could come of going back there, and nothing could convince him to do it.

Almost nothing, as it turned out.

He heard about it by accident, or coincidence, or just the movements of the Force. On his second visit to Jedha, Cere had pulled him aside and told him one of her contacts on the Hidden Path had reached out with an emergency. A Senator's daughter had been kidnapped by an Inquisitor. They knew nothing about the Fortress Inquisitorius. They needed help that Cere couldn't give...and Cal could.

After his vision on Bogano, Cal couldn't just stand by and let a little girl stay there.

It was another coincidence that he arrived at the briefing just as he heard someone say, "We shouldn't be doing this. No one's ever made it back out."

"Almost no one," he said as he walked in, BD on his back peeking curiously out at the group.

"Who are you?"

Cal opened his mouth to answer, but someone else there beat him to it. "Seriously? How can you not recognize him, Wade? That's Cal Kestis. He's on the Empire's Most Wanted list! The hair, the scars, it's got to be him. He's even wearing the poncho! You are, aren't you?"

"Uh. Yeah," Cal said, a little flustered at being recognized—not that it should have been a surprise. He'd quite literally raced across a billboard with his own face on it, showing his Wanted notice. "I heard you needed help getting into the Fortress. I was there five years ago. Sneaked in, although getting out was a lot, uh, louder. But we can help."

He patted the holotable and BD-1 hopped down and projected his own map of the interior, far more detailed. He'd even kept records of the troops they'd encountered, as Cal had sliced his way through.

"Oh wow. You really have been there. We could never get that kind of intel from the outside. Why were you there?"

"One of the Inquisitors got a holocron. A list of Force-sensitive children."

For the first time, a bearded man in the back made a sound, a strangled sort of gasp. "What happened to it?" The voice was a little rough, but Cal still knew a Coruscanti accent when he heard one, even this far out from the Core. In the Force he was…muted, like a gray veil was drawn across him, but…

"I destroyed it," he said, watching the figure steadily as the others crowded around the holotable to study BD's maps. "I got it back, and I destroyed it. Those children deserve better than to be hunted by the Empire. Like we are."

That sigh told him everything. Cal had felt another flare of surprised recognition when his name had been said, but it had disappeared too quickly for him to figure out where it had come from. Now that he was paying attention—and a lot about this man discouraged paying attention, maybe a little too much—Cal was almost sure he knew who this was.

Everyone else was still occupied, arguing over how they were going to get in, how they would get everyone out again. Cal stepped closer, lowering his voice just in case. "Master Kenobi?"

"Ben," the man said immediately, but Cal had been feeling for it in the Force this time, that brief spark of recognition. Then Ben paused, and finally turned to look at Cal directly for the first time, searching his face curiously. "You were the one Quinlan spoke of."

"Master Vos?" Cal asked, surprised. Quinlan Vos had taught him, just for a few months, only a year or so after he'd arrived at the Temple. He'd been the only one who could teach a young Cal Kestis how to understand and control what he was seeing when he touched things. For a while, Cal had hoped Master Vos would ask him to be his Padawan, and had guiltily harbored a little disappointment when it hadn't happened, but that was all…so long ago now. "Uh…yeah. I must be."

Master Kenobi—Ben—gave him a quiet, tired smile. "I cannot imagine your unique abilities have made navigating this galaxy easier," he said, "but in case you hadn't heard, Quinlan is still alive."

"He is?" Cal's heart lifted. Any news of just one other Jedi still living… "Masters Eno Cordova and Cere Junda are also alive. They're together, they're working to rebuild the Archives."

"Don't tell me anything more," Ben said quickly, but there was a bloom of relief in his eyes before they were both called to the table to help plan.

The trip to Nur wasn't long, but long enough for Ben to sit quietly beside Cal, desert robe folded across his lap. "The Empire's Most Wanted? From what I understand, the Empire is hunting a great many people. More than it would like known about publicly. What exactly did you do to earn a spot on that list?"

"Where do you want me to start?" Cal answered with a wry grin. "That picture they're using is old. Probably from the security cameras the first time I was in the Fortress."

"How did you make it out again, exactly? Your ship?"

"Well…yes and no. Cere and I were facing Vader—"

"Vader?" Ben exclaimed, drawing a few looks from the others. "You've faced him?"

"Yeah. I kinda flooded the place. I guess they fixed it." Cal shrugged, as though surviving Darth Vader was only an irritation, an inconvenience, and not something almost no Jedi have done. "He got me, but my friends took care of me. My friend Merrin got me and Cere out of the water. I remember seeing her magic."

"Her—"

"She's a Nightsister of Dathomir." Then, as Cal watched Ben's face turn wary, he added, "She's family. She's the only one left of her sisters. You'd like her."

"Oh, I'm certain. What makes you say that?" Ben asked skeptically.

Cal grinned. "You're both really good at being sarcastic," he said, and felt a little silent triumph at the startled expression. "Seriously. She's a good friend."

"Well. We've all had to adapt, I suppose." Ben shifted as the ship trilled its warning that they'd exit hyperspace in five minutes. "Did you really destroy that holocron?"

"Cut it in half with my lightsaber. It…I think it was the right thing to do. I wonder sometimes, but—"

"It was." Ben was watching the flow of hyperspace out the window instead, but Cal felt how much he meant his next words. "We need to keep those children safe."

"Yeah. Including the one the Inquisitors have." Cal's hand settled on his lightsaber as the others started getting ready. "What's her name again?"

Ben's fear was beginning to leach into the Force, but he smiled, clearly thinking of her. "Leia. It's Leia."

"Leia," Cal repeated, committing it to memory in case he found her first. "I'm looking forward to meeting her."

Chapter Two: Bad Ending

"Reva?"

***

It was later. He couldn't see. He could feel the tightness of the manacles around his wrists, arms, legs, thighs, head. Something on the chair beneath him was wet. He could smell blood, taste tin. He could hear the faint hum of the electrodes in the chair, dormant, waiting. Distant footsteps. Voices outside the closed door.

Reva's voice, growing louder. "...something for you. A surprise."

"I do not enjoy surprises, Third Sister. You will not distract me. Do not think I will so easily forget your incompetence at allowing Kenobi to escape."

"Not a distraction, just a token. In apology, Lord Vader. A Jedi. It's not Kenobi, but still one I think you've wanted for a long time."

He heard the door open. He heard slow, firm footsteps on the grating. He felt the temperature drop in the room. The swirl of cold in the Force that accompanied Vader everywhere he went.

He heard the breathing.

There was a long, horrible pause.

"Kestis." Vader drew it out, adding sibilance, as if savoring the name. "You have done well to capture this one. Keep him alive. Do not let him escape. When I return…he will accompany me to Mustafar."

"Of course, Lord Vader."

Cal could hear the swirl of Vader's cape in the stillness, feel the air move, the pressure in the room dropping again as that presence moved away.

Then a hand. Fingertips on his jaw, so sudden and gentle as to be shocking. There was nowhere to move, but he jerked aside anyway, gritting his teeth against the flaring of pain.

"Why you?"

Reva. Reva's voice, low and angry and wracked with guilt and pain Cal knew she couldn't afford, as an Inquisitor.

"Why did it have to be you? You got out of here once, you got away from him, and you came back."

The hand slid down to his throat and squeezed. Cal's hands balled into fists—but her grip released him and she just rested her hand there, against his pulse.

"I can't. He'll kill me and then it's all wasted. I can't save you."

Cal swallowed against a sandpaper throat, licked cracked lips. "You…put me…here."

"I know. And you have to stay. I can't explain why." He heard a little laugh, just a chuckle, just like she used to do in the Temple. She'd always been so serious. "You'll probably die here. Maybe it'll even be a mercy. But he won't take you anywhere."

"Reva."

He felt the warmth that was her leaning closer. She needed to. His voice was barely making it past his lips. "Trilla…" he managed, and felt her jolt of surprise in the Force. "She…wanted…to stop…he k-killed her for it…and Masana…I set her free too…you can…still go back…"

No answer, but he knew she hadn't left. Her finger traced along the blaster scar on his neck. He wished, recklessly and with the intensity of knowing his life wasn't long now, he wished he could tell her how he'd gotten them. About Master Tapal, about Prauf, Cere, Cordova, BD, Greez, Merrin, Bode. His people, his family, the one he'd found after he'd lost Reva and Caleb.

"She wanted…Trilla…she said, 'avenge us'..."

"I know." Now Reva sounded like she had before, cool and calm with that edge of disdain. "Sit tight, Jedi. I'm sure someone will be along soon."

The hand withdrew, leaving his neck cold from the lack of contact. He heard her boots on the grating. "Reva," he tried again, hoarse, barely more than a whisper. He'd told himself he wouldn't scream, but everyone screamed eventually.

The door slid shut.

[to-hold-the-line]

Name: Cal Kestis

Age: 23 (verse dependent)

Gender: Cis Male

Sexuality: Bisexual, Demiromantic

Profession: Scrapper (former), Jedi Knight (current)

Appearance: 5’9”, lean build, nearly shoulder-length red hair, green eyes, pale skin, freckles, stubble of a beard, one tattoo on his right forearm of an employee barcode from the scrapyard he used to work at.

FC: Cameron Monaghan

Personality: Compassionate, awkward with romance, noble, determined, can be obsessive in regards to his goals, always has to be active and/or working, still figuring himself out, intelligent, overly self critical at times, needs to learn to slow down and rest before he burns himself out, is slowly figuring out how inherently flawed the Jedi Code was and wants to do better for his eventual students, far too trusting, treats almost everyone around him (droids included) with respect and kindness, natural explorer.

Goals: To defeat Darth Vader and the Galactic Empire, to make Tanalorr a safe haven for those seeking refuge from the Empire, to train a new generation of Jedi.

Strengths and Powers: Strong in the Force, and can use it for telekinesis, Force jump/dash, enhanced spacial awareness, mind trickery, and mental/emotional stabilization. Adept with several forms of lightsaber combat, though he prefers to switch between double-bladed and dual wielding stances. Adept with an ascension cable (grappling hook). Decent shot with a blaster, though he's not entirely proficient with it. Increased agility, speed, and mental fortitude. Quick learner. He has a fair singing voice, though untrained.

Weaknesses: Cal tends to overwork himself, and be extremely harsh with himself when things go wrong. He blames himself for every loss of life that happens under his watch. He trusts a little too easily, often not questioning the motives of new companions (although he's learned to try and do that more often because of Bode. It's verse dependent.) Has trouble expressing negative emotions in a non-destructive way because he was always taught to repress them; he has trouble with showing romantic affection or coping with attraction for the same reason (again, he's learning these skills, too.) He's mortal, despite all of his Jedi sturdiness and agility. Often forgets to eat or rest when he's hyperfocused on a goal.

Likes: BD-1, Merrin, Greez, Cere, Bode(verse dependent), Kata, anyone who joins his crew, old stories and songs, history, archeology, anthropology, home-cooked meals, savory/salty foods, food in general, people with a good sense of humor/snark, rockets, small droids, non-hostile animals, gardening, watching both plants and people grow, ponchos.

Dislikes: Darth Vader, Emperor Palpatine, Sith, the Empire, Bode(verse dependent), traitors, complaining about things that don't really matter that much to him(i.e. someone getting his order wrong at a cantina), putting himself before others, vast heights(when he's on unstable ground or has nothing underneath him), letting others down, bounty hunters(when they're after him).

Languages: Basic(aka English), Binary

Background: Wookiepedia Link

(The link contains spoilers for both Jedi games, but that's easier on me than typing out his entire bio, since I'm playing him largely canon-compliant.)

Additional Notes:

(I'll add these as I go along.)

[kierazfallenorder]

cal kestis x reader (fluff)

tw : alcohol abuse, arguments, vomitting, fluff, verbal abuse, minor jedi survivor spoilers, happy ending.

“i’m 120% sure i love you, it’s not even because i’m drunk…”

⬇️⬇️not my gif!

i'm sorry for the short length of this story and the bad grammar/punctuation. however, enjoy!

word count: 1204 (short one x)

you walked onto the mantis. you were alone as cal was still out on koboh. he was going to see what he could buy with his priorite shards, he was bound to be back soon. you walk around the mantis, rummaging through cupboards and cabinets. at first, you don't find much interesting. however, you soon come across a large bottle of vodka.

this was unusual for greez to have, you had never seen greez drink anything but water. you figured it must have been cere's, and you took the bottle. with the bottle in hand, you travel to your room where you sit on your bed. using your teeth, you gracefully open the bottle. the strong scent of strawberry hits you as you take a long swig. it tastes refreshing. you enjoy the first drink before it hits you. you get a large rush of alcohol, and you wanted more.

you take larger sips by the minute until you hear the door of the mantis open with cal walking inside. having already downed the bottle of vodka, you stand up and rush to cal. he looks at you confusedly when you walk up to him with a smile across your face. with open arms, you hug cal. he seems surprised, and you wouldn't blame him at all for feeling this way - if you were sober.

you lightly slap cal's back halfway into the hug, and he winces. it appeared that he had a scar there. walking into the kitchen, he looked for the alcohol and cotton. he rummaged through just like you had before. however, once he'd already turned greez's kitchen upside down, he couldn't find it.

"cal?" you slurred your words and spoke muffled.

"y/n, what?"

"what're you looking forr?"

"the alcohol, it's supposed  to be in this drawer here, however, i'm struggling to find it, and i need it urgently.."

"the one with the blue wrapper?" as you spoke, you let out a big gasp inbetween every word as if you were trying to drain out the alcohol with air.

"yes, the one with the blue wr-" he clocked just as soon as you said that. he instantly realised you were drunk. "y/n, why the hell would you drink that?"

"it was there so i had it. i got bored and just.." you were stopped by cal pulling you into a hug and picking you up. he dragged you into his room and laid you in his bed. he looked behind his artifacts that sat on his shelf. behind them, there was a bottle of water. cal places it on the desk and he sits at the foot of the bed, covering you by blankets.

"cal, why are you doing all of this? it's just a little bit of alcohol, i won't die!" you said. every word that escaped your mouth was dragged on and you often emphasised on the letters. for being drunk, you weren't acting too bad. however, you were being extremely loud.

"im doing all of this because i care about you and i seriously dont want you to feel like it's okay to drink like this, because it's not. y/n, please don't drink again.." as he spoke you could tell he felt a sharp pain somewhere in his body. it was obvious that it was coming from the wound on his back.

"what's that from?" you asked curiously and pointed at the rip in his poncho. bd-1 hopped off of cal's back to have a look, too. "looks like i' not the only one who's injured and needs to rest." you spoke with a high level of arrogance and there was a strong tone in your voice that suggested that you really didnt want to talk to him. lightly, you pulled him backwards so he was laying beside you. he blushed..

"y/n, what are you doing?" he acted frustrated.

"what, am i not allowed to lay with my best friend?" you smirk and rest your head on his chest, he shakes his head and looks down at you, grabbing your hand. "cal, you wanna know something?"

"yeah, sure," he says, slightly red from your head is in his chest and the soft moment between the two of you.

"i think i like you."

cal flushes to red and he seems scared. "you, like me?"

"Yeah." with a slight smile you look up at him and place a kiss on his cheek. You’d never been this affectionate towards the boy and it was obvious that he had never felt this level of love or respect. he just sat blankly and smiled to himself.

“there is no way that y/n likes me. me, cal kestis, of all people. you like a stupid jedi like me?” he asks, second guessing himself, as he commonly did. you shush him and turn over so you’re laying stomach to stomach. you smelt of alcohol but he enjoyed the scent as it was yours. your feelings of love toward the jedi were mutual.

“yes they are, i promise you. i swear on my lightsaber, cal.” you were being serious. 

“no, you’re just drunk..” he muttered to himself, unbelievingly. he wasn’t pushy about these things but he knew of a common phrase which cere and greez both often used when they cooked using alcohol. ‘drunk words are sober thoughts.’

the words played through cal’s head, he didn’t want it to be true, it couldn’t be true.. It is. It was and it forever will be. he shoots you a smile and you return it.

“i’m 120% sure i love you, it’s not even because i’m drunk…” with that cal flushes to a deeper red than he already was - if that was possible. he looks at his hands and looks around at the room. he didn’t believe it for a single second. 

“i think i love you, too, y/n..” your face lit up hearing the words. but, before you can stand up, you have to have a drink of water to prevent yourself from vomitting. “y/n?” he sat up quick as he saw you retch, he was lucky enough not to have to face it. “are you okay?” he says worriedly.

“better than ever. yet, i could be even better if-” you cut yourself off and stopped yourself from being sick. with a frown, you looked to your left where cal was holding you. his arms were passionately wrapped around your waist, holding you tightly as he kissed your cheek lightly. in one swift movement, he pulled you backwards to lay you beside him. 

“maybe you just need a boyfriend to keep you safe, hm?” he proposed, indicating that the boyfriend you needed was himself. 

“can that boyfriend be you?”

“if thats what you want, then of course it can.” with that, a smile was stuck on your face as you lightly kissed him. and then it hit you.

this shouldn’t be happening, and wouldnt usually. theres not supposed to be any jedi on jedi, but you two were one of the first to defy against this. you and cal had a lot in store for you and you were going to live forever together, at least you vowed to.

[breakfastteatime]

Hiya! I sent an ask a while ago about Greez bundling up Cal for the cold on Ilum lol, but now I'm having feels on the default being the Bracca poncho... It's an emotionally heavy poncho at this emotional point of the game! Does anyone recognize this? Is it a comfort blanket situation? Or are his other ponchos still in the laundry?

Greez won't let Cal off the ship until he's wearing at least one extra layer. Cal remembers Ilum's bitter chill from his last trip here, except back then there hadn't been a storm, and he'd been surrounded by other Jedi. The cold barely features in his memory, honestly. Mostly, he remembers how afraid he'd been of failure, and how wonderful it had been to find his crystal and see his lightsaber working for the first time.

He doesn't think it will be so easy a test this time.

Cal heads to the engine room, where BD-1 makes a few suggestions about what Cal should wear. Cal appreciates his friend's concern. Yes, he probably should consider bundling himself up in every poncho he owns. Instead, he reaches for the one he's had the longest. The poncho from Bracca has seen him through a lot of bad weather. It's been a blanket and a pillow on a few occasions too. Sure, it was mass-produced and effectively a uniform, but it's Cal's. He's had it since he grew out of his last one. He knows all the Jedi lessons on attachment to possessions, and right now he does not care. He needs something to hold onto, something familiar and reliable. This poncho is very nearly the only constant he has in his entire life, and if he thinks about that too hard, he is absolutely going to come apart. It's going to see him through whatever happens here.

Pulling it on, Cal takes a deep breath and prepares to face his next challenge.

(Anon, I could NOT resist this! The Bracca Poncho is officially Cal's Emotional Support Poncho)