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#buy sweet potato chips
sermna · 7 months
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Currently trying to untangle foods I don't like from foods I convinced myself I didn't like because they were "bad foods"
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confinesofmy · 8 months
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not to be a spokesperson for a brand that is not paying me but i fr have bought twice as much at aldi this month for $50 less than i would've otherwise. it's insane.
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luckystorein22 · 9 months
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What is the best way to make sweet potato chips crispy?
Making crispy sweet potato chips at home involves a few key steps, including proper preparation, slicing, seasoning, and cooking techniques. Here's a step-by-step guide to help you achieve crispy sweet potato chips:
Ingredients:
Sweet potatoes
Olive oil or vegetable oil
Salt and other desired seasonings (e.g., paprika, garlic powder)
Instructions:
Selecting Sweet Potatoes:Choose fresh and firm sweet potatoes. The fresher the potatoes, the better the chance of achieving crispiness.
Preparation: Wash and peel the sweet potatoes. You can leave the skin on if you prefer a more rustic texture.
Uniform Slicing: Slice the sweet potatoes into thin, uniform rounds. To achieve consistent thickness, you can use a mandoline slicer or a sharp knife. Thinner slices tend to result in crispier chips.
Soaking (Optional): Soaking the sliced sweet potatoes in cold water for about 30 minutes can help remove excess starch, promoting crispiness. Pat them dry thoroughly before proceeding.
Preheat Oven:Preheat your oven to 375°F (190°C). A hot oven is crucial for getting crispy chips.
Seasoning: In a bowl, toss the sweet potato slices with a small amount of olive oil or vegetable oil. Season with salt and any desired seasonings or spices. Ensure that the slices are evenly coated.
Arrange on Baking Sheets: Place the seasoned sweet potato slices in a single layer on parchment-lined baking sheets. Avoid overcrowding to allow for even cooking.
Baking:Bake in the preheated oven for approximately 15-25 minutes, depending on the thickness of the slices. Flip the slices halfway through the baking time to ensure even crispiness on both sides.
Monitor Closely: Keep a close eye on the chips, especially toward the end of the cooking time. They can go from golden to burnt quickly.
Cooling: Allow the sweet potato chips to cool on the baking sheets. They will continue to crisp up as they cool.
Storage:Store completely cooled sweet potato chips in an airtight container to maintain their crispiness.
Tips:
Even Thickness: Ensure that the sweet potato slices are of uniform thickness to promote even cooking.
Oil Amount: Use a minimal amount of oil to avoid making the chips too greasy. Tossing them lightly ensures an even coating.
Spice Variations: Experiment with different seasonings like paprika, garlic powder, cayenne pepper, or cinnamon for a variety of flavor profiles.
By following these steps and paying attention to details, you can achieve crispy and flavorful homemade sweet potato chips that make for a delicious and healthier snack.
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redr0sewrites · 8 months
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Adam x Reader General Hcs
HAD TO WRITE SOMETHING FOR HIM HES JUST SO. AUGAHGEHEG. i love him. characterizing him is so fun, but so challenging at the same time.
🥀 Cw: adam being adam, sfw + nsfw hcs, smut, breeding kink
🥀minors dni with the nsfw portion
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sfw:
Adam is more prone to casual flings and hookups, hes def not huge on relationships and longterm partners
this means that if your with him, you must be pretty special bc hes a huge ass handful
while he is a pretty big douche, adam is definitely loyal imo
deep down, hes still pretty insecure about both lilith and eve, and im a firm believer that he would never cheat on a partner if he was in a serious relationship
adam comes up with very.... interesting nicknames for you that are 10x more vulgar than the ones he uses for everyone else
hes HUGE on nicknames and petnames in general, at the start of a relationship theyre pretty crude and flirty but over time they start to become sweeter
sugartits, doll, sweet cheeks, bitch boy/babe, babycakes, BAE, lemondrop (idk it just fits), mama/mami, honeytits, honestly anything that comes to mind
adam likes to put "my" in front of most of your petnames, its not so much in a possessive way, moreso in a bragging way, he just loves telling the world that your HIS
he also definitely calls you bro, brah, dude, etc he doesn't care that it "doesnt sound romantic" 💀
adam finds the MOST unhinged things hilarious, hes the type to watch those ten hour long youtube videos of a spinning potato chip and laugh every ten seconds
speaking of, he has one of those loud, booming laughs with a slight wheeze to it
"BAAHAHAHAHAH BAE COME HERE LOOK AT THIS HAHA" and its just a low quality video of a water bottle falling over???
100% a shitty pickup line user
and also a shitty flirter in general
his flirting is just
obnoxious
adam is very proud of you, when the two of you officially got together he probably called half of heaven to announce that you two were dating
"THATS MY PARTNER‼️‼️‼️" type of vibes
adam acts like he isnt big on cuddles bit is secretly the clingiest, most touch starved person alive
PLEASE let him hold you, this man is tall af and loves just swallowing you in an embrace
when he was "courting" you (irritating you constantly and flirting with you obnoxiously until you caught on that he was serious) the biggest tell that his feelings were genuine was the amount of physical contact he initiated
adam was always leaning on you, throwing an arm over your shoulder, resting a hand on your thigh, hooking his arm through yours, overall invading your personal space
he was incredibly happy to FINALLY be able to cuddle with you when you both got together, and HAS to fall asleep touching you in some way every night
adam is almost always wearing his exterminator helmet, but he really likes it when you take it off for him at the end of the day. even he doesn't really understand why, but there's something so intimate to him about the fact that you love his real face more than the persona he puts on
he would rather die than admit it tho
hes not good at words or communication in general, and prefers to express his appreciation through actions
he brings you foods that he knows you like on days where you're especially busy, he gives you song recommendations that he'll think you'll like, he'll buy you a trinket he saw you eyeing at the store, just tiny things like that
adam genuinely does care about you, but as per his usual adam-ness, he would rather go bald than live up to that 💀
nsfw:
you cant tell me this man isnt kinky as shit
hes tried pretty much everything
HE LOVES TO HIT FROM THE BACK, DEF LIKES DOGGY STYLE
i also think he would like the mating press too, getting to watch your face as he wrecks you while also having the opportunity to leave bites all over your thighs, and feel them tremble as he fucks you? sign him up!
his dick is big big
i think hed be a little thicker than average, with a few veins running up the underside, but its his length that's downright heavenly
adam keeps himself pretty well groomed, but has a prominent happy trail and light fuzz at the very base of his cock
listen, this is the first man we're talking about, he KNOWS what hes doing
whether you're male or female, he will go down on you
once he buries himself between your thighs youre done for, adam barely comes up for air as he devours you
hes def sloppy w it too, loves when you cum on his face so he can lick it up
enjoys it when you return the favor as well, i actually think hed really realy like receiving head
would def fuck your face until your drooling
if you hve an oral fixation, you're in luck bc he LOVES watching you suck his dick, his fingers, anything really
adam always makes you lick and suck his fingers before fingering you, and will sometimes trigger your gag reflex by shoving them down your throat to watch you gasp and whine
adam has STAMINA, expect to stay up all night bc this man will stop at nothing to make sure you're both satisfied
i swear this man is built to breed, he has a HUGE breeding kink and goes crazy at the sight of his cum dripping from your hole. even if it's physically impossible for you to get pregnant, adam still babbles about "fucking a prety little babe" into you when he cums
adam likes using plugs to make sure his cum stays inside you, he'll also finger it back inside and loves smearing his cum on your thighs and ass
he also brings his fingers up to your face and has you lick the cum off of them
LOOOVEEEESSS marking you, by the end of the night youre always covered in bruises and scratches and hickeys galore
i love adam guys yes ik hes a douche but hes my douche <3
i wish i characterized him better but whateverrrrrr i dont want to write him as a total asshole but hes def not an angel either (haha im so funny💀)
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girldad!joel
Hi, it's me thinking about Sarah's dad Joel Miller again. I've been seeing the wonderful headcanons floating around and I just couldn't get all of these sweet images out of my head.
girldad!joel holding a band in between his lips as he keeps glancing down at a magazine tutorial on how to style Sarah’s hair for her first school dance. “It wouldn’t hurt if you just stopped squirming baby girl.”
girldad!joel taking the day off from work to chaperone Sarah’s class field trip to the farm. He sits on the bus, his broad body takes up a whole seat. He gives Sarah her space but she just can’t help hanging with him the whole day. 
girldad!joel wrapping presents on Christmas Eve and lining them up under the tree, stepping back and being proud of how many gifts he can buy his little girl. 
girldad!joel picking Beauty and the Beast to watch for movie night because he feels a lot like Maurice, a single father who would do anything for his spunky, smart daughter.
girldad!joel pouring two bowls of cereal and joining Sarah on the couch for cartoons on Saturday morning. He relishes these lazy mornings, even if Sarah almost always spills milk on the couch.
girldad!joel grocery shopping, trying to stick within his budget but allowing the splurge of Ben & Jerry’s chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and a teeny bopper magazine for Sarah because she’s always such a big help.
girldad!joel dropping Sarah off for her first day of kindergarten, telling her she’s such a big girl and how proud he is of her. He only allows himself to feel a sense of pride that he’s taking good care of his baby girl after he steps up into his truck and is alone. A single tear wells in his eye before he starts the engine and drives to work. 
girldad!joel wearing a cheap plastic tiara and not being able to fit the acrylic ring around his thick finger while sitting around the coffee table and playing Pretty Pretty Princess with Sarah.  
girldad!joel taking Sarah to the hardware store to pick out the perfect color for her big girl bedroom. She sleeps in his bed that night while the paint dries, Joel stays up relishing the feel of her little, warm body against his because he knows it’ll probably be the last time he can hold his baby girl as she falls asleep. 
girldad!joel letting Sarah pick the music in his truck, his cheeks turning pink when she starts to tease him that he actually *does* like the new boy band song. 
girldad!joel putting the little WORLD'S BEST DAD trophy keychain Sarah bought him at the school Christmas store on his keys.
girldad!joel nervously stammering through asking Sarah if she needs any “uh… pads or… hmm… tampons” before he leaves for the store feeling slightly embarrassed at how she rolls her eyes at his embarrassment and tells him she’s good. 
girldad!joel eating all of the marshmallows Sarah burns before she toasts the perfect one for her smore. 
girldad!joel waking up on Saturday morning exhausted from a long week of work guzzling coffee down while he helps Sarah get ready for her soccer game. 
girldad!joel looking up from all of his invoices and complimenting Sarah’s newest colored coloring page while they sit at the dining room table. 
girldad!joel helping Sarah learn to ride her bike, which she easily learns. He takes a giant breath when he watches her pedal away without his help. She’s getting so big.
girldad!joel folding laundry on the couch while watching the Rangers game, he gets a little emotional thinking about how much bigger Sarah’s clothes are now. He fondly remembers folding her onesies and pajamas when he was just an overwhelmed single father of a baby.
girldad!joel wearing the BEST FLIPPIN’ DAD apron Sarah bought him while preparing Thanksgiving dinner for her and Tommy. Boxed mashed potatoes, Stove Top stuffing, jarred gravy, canned cranberries, canned yams with lots of marshmallows on top, Jiffy cornbread, and a turkey that might be a little too dry. Sarah thinks all of it is delicious and saves extra room for grocery store bakery baked pumpkin pie with extra whipped cream. 
girldad!joel stuffing Easter eggs with candy and coins and hiding them all over the house while Sarah sleeps. He cheekily acts shocked when she finds the hidden golden egg with $5 stuffed inside. “Wow baby girl! That’s a lot of money!” 
girldad!joel swearing to himself while putting together a Barbie Dream House for Sarah’s birthday. His frustration grows when part 3C won’t plug into wall 4A. 
girldad!joel dropping Sarah off at Uncle Tommy’s for a sleepover before his first actual date in ten years. Tommy wishes him good luck as he grabs Sarah’s pink backpack from him, Joel can tell his brother’s nervous for him. He’s nervous as hell too. 
girldad!joel shyly letting you know that he has a young daughter, hoping you don’t run away because he really likes you. His heart beats rapidly when you give him a warm smile and ask about her. 
girldad!joel taking Sarah out for ice cream, both of them sitting on the tailgate of his truck. He sucks in a bracing breath before telling her how he’s met somebody who he really likes. She turns, mint chocolate chip green all over her mouth and smiles a wide grin telling him how excited she is and that finally he found someone who could deal with him. 
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Also, imagine Joel listening to "Robin" by Taylor Swift. You got the dragonflies above your bed You have a favorite spot on the swing set You have no room in your dreams for regrets You have no idea The time will arrive for the cruel and the mean You'll learn to bounce back just like your trampoline But now we'll curtail your curiosity In sweetness
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aesethewitch · 4 months
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Learning to Cook Like a Witch: Using the Scraps
Cooking can create a lot of waste. From peels and rinds to bones and leaves, people throw away quite a lot of scraps in the kitchen. And witches, as you may know, are experts in the art of the cunning use of whatever we’ve got around.
As a witch who spends a lot of time in the kitchen, I’ve had ample opportunities to get creative in my cooking craft. It helps that I grew up in a household defined by scarcity: not our own, by the time I was conscious enough to remember, but my parents’ poverty. It colored the way I learned to cook, using everything I possibly could, making enough to last, preserving what I didn’t immediately use, and creatively reusing leftovers and scraps.
There are some topics I won’t necessarily cover here. Composting is an option, but there are some bits of food scrap that don’t need to be composted — they can be saved and repurposed for all sorts of things, magic and mundane. Likewise, recycling, buying sustainably, and growing your own food when you can are all great options for reducing household waste in the kitchen.
For the purposes of this post, I want to focus specifically on food scraps. This is an organized list of kitchen scraps that I’ve used in a variety of other dishes and projects. I’m focusing primarily on food waste, not so much on packaging (such as reusing egg cartons, milk containers, boxes, and so forth).
Vegetable Scraps
Freeze leftover vegetable scraps to make stock. This is a fairly common bit of advice — save bits of leftover vegetables to make a vegetable stock or another kind of stock. It’s good advice! I keep a bag in my freezer that I put vegetable scraps in to save until I’m ready to make a new batch of stock. Not all veggies should be saved like this and used for stock! Some make stock bitter or otherwise unpleasant-tasting. Personally, I tend to freeze these for stock:
- The skins, ends, and leftover cuts of onions (just be wary of the skins; too much will make your broth bitter) - The ends of celery (not the leaves — they’re bitter!) - Corn cobs - Garlic skins, ends, tiny cloves that aren’t useful otherwise, and sprouted cloves - The ends of carrots (also not the leaves) - The ends of leeks - Pepper tops/bottoms (not the seeds)
I would recommend against putting things like potatoes, brussels sprouts, cabbage, and leafy greens in there. Potatoes don’t add flavor, sprouts and cabbage make the whole thing taste like those foods, and leafy greens end up bitter. If something has a strong, distinctive flavor (beets, sprouts), I wouldn’t add it to my freezer bag. These scraps often form the veggie portion of my Sick-Be-Gone Chicken Broth spell recipe!
Regrow leeks, green onions, and celery. Pop these in a bit of water and watch them grow back! It’s a fun experiment, and you’ll never have to buy them again.
Plant sprouted garlic. Aside from the fact that you can still cook and eat garlic that’s sprouted, you can plant a sprouted clove in a pot. Care for it well enough, and you’ll end up with a full head of garlic from that one clove!
Fry potato peels. Anytime I make mashed potatoes or peel potatoes for something, I always save the peels. Give them a thorough rinse and shallow-fry them in oil, turning them over until they’re golden and crispy. Toss them in a bit of salt and pepper while they’re still hot, and you’ve got tasty chips to snack on while you cook the rest of your meal! No need to cover them in more oil or anything — the heat will cause the salt to stick right to them.
Save leaves for pesto. Yum, yum, yum. Pesto isn’t just all about basil, you know. Save the leaves from carrots, beets, radishes, and even celery to grind up alongside basil, garlic, salt, and lemon juice for a delicious pesto recipe.
Fruit Scraps
Save citrus peels. Peels from oranges, lemons, grapefruits, and other citrus fruits have a multitude of uses. Candy them for a sweet treat, dry them to add to potpourri or incense, or save them to put into a simmer pot for bright, sunny energy.
Juice the whole fruit. Again, thinking mostly about citrus fruits, when you need the zest from something but not the rest, don’t just throw away the fruit. Squeeze out all the juice you can. Even if you don’t need it right now, you can freeze it to use later in simmer pots, fruity waters, or anything else that needs a touch of juice.
Turn extra fruit and berries into jam or syrup. If you’ve got berries and fruit that are about to go off, or maybe the ends of strawberries, don’t toss them! Look up recipes for jam of the specific fruit you’ve got or make an infused syrup. Syrups in particular can be used for cocktails, teas, and desserts for an extra magical kick.
Pickle watermelon rinds. That’s right. Pickle those suckers. They’re so tasty. I’ve seen people make kimchi with watermelon rinds, too, though I’ve never tried it myself!
Save seeds for abundance work. Seeds in general are great for spells geared toward long-term success, new beginnings, and — when there are a lot of them — wealth. Different fruit seeds have properties that tend to correspond with the fruit they come from, so consider their potential purposes before you just toss them! (Note also that some fruit seeds are toxic; these would be suitable for baneful workings.)
Keep cherry stems for love magic. Have you ever done that thing where you tie a cherry stem with your tongue? If I’m eating cherries, I like to save some of the stems for love workings. Tie them into little knots like you might with string while envisioning ensnaring the love you’re looking for. I wouldn’t do this with a particular person in mind; binding someone to you is almost never a good idea. I’ve used it to attract specific qualities in a person of romantic interest: attentiveness, humor, kindness, and so forth.
Use pits to represent blockages, barriers, and problems. I most often use them in baneful workings, typically jammed into a poppet’s mouth or throat to keep someone from talking shit. It could also represent a sense of dread in that way — a pit in the stomach, uneasy and nauseating. But you could also use them in the sense of removal, ritualistically removing the pit or problem from a given situation.
Herb Scraps
Freeze or dry extra fresh herbs. Different drying techniques are ideal for specific herbs. I’d suggest looking up recommended methods before sticking anything in the microwave. If you’d like to freeze your herbs instead, I typically will lay them on a damp paper towel, wrap them up, place them into a freezer-safe bag, and then put them in the freezer. Most herbs will keep for a couple months this way. When you want to use them, pull them out and let them defrost right on the counter.
Make pesto. Again, pesto isn’t just basil! Experiment with tossing in different scraps of herbs to find out what combination you like best.
Reuse steeped tea. Particularly when I use loose herbal tea, I like to lay out the used tea to dry out. It can be burned similarly to loose incense, though the scent may be somewhat weaker than with herbs that are fresher or unused. I find that it’s fine, since I’m sensitive to smells anyways.
Toss extra herbs into your stock freezer bag. Just like with vegetables, extra herbs make welcome additions to a scrap stock pot. I always make a point to save sage, thyme, marjoram, and ginger. You can add just about anything to a stock pot, but be aware of the flavors you’re adding. Not all herbs will match with all dishes.
Protein Scraps
Dry and crush empty egg shells. This is one most witches will know! I use crushed egg shells for protection magic most often: sprinkled at a doorstep mixed with other herbs, added to jars, and spread around spell candles.
Save shrimp, crab, and lobster shells. They’re a goldmine of flavor. Toss them into water with veggies and herbs, and you’ve got a delicious, easy shellfish stock. Use it to make fishy soups and chowders that much richer.
Don’t discard roasted chicken remains. Use them for stock, just like the shells. I like to get rotisserie chickens on occasion since they’re ready-made and very tasty. Once all the meat has been stripped off the bones, simmer the entire carcass with — you guessed it — veggies and herbs for a tasty chicken stock.
Reuse bacon grease for frying. After cooking bacon, don’t throw away the grease right away. Melt it over low heat, strain the bits of bacon out, and pour it into a jar to put in the fridge. You can use it to fry all sorts of things, but my favorite thing is brussels sprouts. They pick up the delicious, salty, bacony flavor from all that rendered bacon fat. So good.
Other Scraps
Use stale bread for croutons or bread crumbs. When I reach the stale end of a loaf of bread, as long as it isn’t moldy, I like to tear it into pieces and toss it into the oven for a little while. Let it cool and then pulse it in a food processor, and I’ve got delicious bread crumbs! Or, cut it a little more neatly, toss it in oil and seasonings, and then bake, and now I’ve got homemade croutons for salads. You can really hone your herbs for both of these, tuning them to be perfect for whatever spell needs you have.
Small amounts of leftover sugar. I don’t know why, but I always end up with a tiny amount of white and brown sugar in the containers. This can be used in teas, of course, but I like to offer it up to spirits. In particular, my ancestors tend to appreciate a spoonful of brown sugar stirred into a small, warmed cup of milk. You can also look up mug cake or single-serving cookie recipes; often, they’re cooked in the microwave, and they only need a little sugar to make!
Keep vanilla bean pods. Vanilla is fucking expensive. When I have a little extra and want to really splurge for a special occasion, I’ll get a couple pods. And because they’re so expensive, I hate wasting any part of them. They’re good for love magic, sure, but you can also toss the spent pods in a jar full of sugar to make vanilla-infused sugar. I’ll often use the pods to make infused milks, too; warm the milk over low heat, add the pods, and let it steep like tea. It goes great in teas and desserts. For a nice self-love spell, sometimes I’ll melt chocolate into the vanilla milk and make hot cocoa!
Save the rinds from Parmesan and Pecorino Romano cheese. You might not be able to just bite into these, but they’re fabulous additions to a stock pot. They add a rich, umami depth to the flavors. I also like to throw these into pots of tomato sauce to add even more flavor to the sauce.
Used coffee is still coffee. After I make a pot of coffee, I’ll sometimes save the grounds by letting them dry back out. I wouldn’t make another cup of coffee with them, since all the flavor’s gone, but they’ll still have attributes of energy generation and smell great. I like to pack used grounds into sachets to hang in places where I want to encourage more energy and focus, replaced every few days or so. Coffee grounds also have high amounts of nitrogen in them, which can help plants thrive; just be careful about pH values in the soil! You don’t want to hurt your plants with too much acidity.
Final Thoughts
I hope you found these tips helpful! There are a ton more ways to save and reuse kitchen scraps that would otherwise go to waste. Sometimes, tossing stuff into the compost or trash can’t be avoided. But I’ve found that being aware of the possibilities can help diminish the amount that gets wasted.
If you have questions or other suggestions for reusing kitchen scraps, feel free to drop them in my inbox, reblogs, or replies. And if you did enjoy this post, consider tossing a couple dollars in my tip jar! Supporters get early and sometimes exclusive access to my work, and monthly members get bonuses like commission discounts and extras. (:
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xf-cases-solved · 1 month
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mulder vs. scully and her period
-first off, he 1000% keeps track of her cycle - it's vital to his survival - but he would never ever ever ever tell scully that
-he learned to start keeping track after too many blunders during their first year working together. like, he'd had girlfriends in the past, obviously, but he didn't travel the country constantly with them day in and day out. even diana was rly reserved about her period, preferring to keep that sort of thing to herself. but scully is a medical doctor. while she may take issue with any emotional aspect, and be uncomfortable and embarrassed about that part, she is completely nonplussed by the physical aspect, and talks about it very bluntly and openly, and that took mulder by surprise at first. he wasn't used to being around a woman who wasn't bashful about it, and it made him uncomfortable at first, but eventually he was like "ok, this is going to be part of working with her, i need to get over myself and up my game"
-in their entire time working together, mulder has made one (1) "are you on your period or something?" joke. it was about six months into their partnership, and scully was (rightfully) irritated at him about something and he had tried for some levity. let's just say that he, ah... he has never made that mistake again
-he always has a tampon on hand. like, always. it is more reliable to ask mulder if he has a tampon than it would be to ask another woman in the bathroom if she has one. he started keeping them on him when she got her period on a three hour long flight that had an hour delay on the tarmac, and she'd accidentally forgotten to take a couple tampons out of her checked luggage, so he'd watched her shift around uncomfortably with a makeshift pad made of thin, coarse airplane bathroom toilet paper, and he felt really bad that he couldn't do anything about it, so on the flight back, he bought a travel pack pack of like, six tampons when he went to get sunflower seeds, just in case. then at some point he was like "mb i should keep a couple in my overnight bag for her," and that led to, "she's in my apartment a lot, i should throw a couple under the sink," until eventually he was King of the Tampons
-(he even has different absorbency levels, okay? like, he is on top of his shit)
-he used to buy chocolate for her on long drives when he knew she was on the rag, always saying something like, "it was two for one, don't worry about it," even when it wasn't, until he started to pay closer attention, and he realized she actually tended to crave salty foods instead of sweet ones, so he switched from chocolate to potato chips and pretzels. (he would play it off as though he got them for himself and then would keep offering her some, bc he knew that would help her not sit there and (completely needlessly) dwell over eating junk food)
-she gets really bad cramps the first day and a half or so, and he haaaates it, bc even tho she waves it off, he can see the way she clenches her jaw, and is hunched over whenever she thinks he's not paying attention. if she's over at his place when they're happening - even if they're working - he makes her sit with a heating pad and encourages her to drink the whole glass of water when she takes her midol. he has massaged her lower back on more than one occasion
-she stopped getting her periods regularly when she was going through cancer treatment, her body too sick and weak. about two months after going into remission, she bled through her slacks on some rural highway in arkansas, and although mulder listened to her complain and validated her frustration, he was secretly so relieved, bc he knew it meant that her body was really and truly starting to heal
-her periods become kind of a taboo subject in a way they hadn't ever been before once she learns of her infertility. she doesn't talk as openly about them anymore, but he's still always prepared and after four/five plus years together he doesn't need her to tell him how to make her feel better. he can intuit it. she doesn't say it, but he knows that she's grateful
-her periods become a dark topic when the ivf fails. the period that confirmed it didn't take was hard on both of them, and she spent every night of it at mulder's apartment letting him hold her and allowing him the privilege of caring for her, which she usually resisted
-he actually noticed that she missed a period before he was taken in oregon, but he had no reason to suspect it was anything but just a fluke, so he didn't say anything. when he glanced at his calendar and saw what week it was, though, he did have a fleeting moment where he was like "what if?" not in a serious capacity, but in a wistful way. i mean, they'd been going at it like rabbits and had never once even considered using a condom. like, why would they, right? but in his brief fantasy, he thinks about how she would react seeing a plus sign on a pregnancy test. it would be familiar - that look of disbelief and awe she got whenever they witnessed something unexplainable - and he would be the cause of it, and how amazing would it feel to be able to give that to her? to give that to both of them? but he knows it'll never be anything more than a pipe dream (bitch, you thought!)
-we won't get into sad later stuff, but i'll just say that he really, really resents the fact that he wasn't there to take care of her during her pregnancy. and he would have been fantastic at it. he would have toed the line between supportive but not overbearing perfectly. she would have had a beautiful nine months, like she had more than earned. he'll never totally forgive the universe for taking that from them
-and to conclude, let me just say for the record, mulder is all about period sex. orgasms help cramps, right? he's just being altruistic. ("YOUR orgasm doesn't help my cramps, mulder" "hey, we'll never know for sure unless we try")
-lay down a towel, lay down your woman, and get to it. bro eats crime scene evidence. there's no way he'd let a period stop him from fucking. god bless and amen
-the end
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tropicalszns · 3 months
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INSECURITES
౨ৎ ⋆ ࣪ ˖ gojo x black!fem! reader
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about
you were insecure about your body and especially your weight and stomach pudge. satoru and you were gonna go out with friends until you asked him the question, “do you think i am fat?”
contains
trigger warning; weight, eating. gojo treasuring you, stomach kisses, sweet words, comfort by gojo, crying, just soft bittersweet moments.
w.c.
1,177
a/n
more of an appreciation post, and how I’ve lowkey been feeling so sorry if this gets personal.. repost and likes r much appreciated to share my work, feedback as well ! <3
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YOU STARED at yourself in the mirror, tears swarming your vision. You were in nothing but your bra and your underwear, staring at nothing but your stomach. You tried to stand up tall, put your arms by your sides but nothing was working. You sniffled as you rubbed your nose, small tear drops ran down your cheeks. You wiped your tears, putting a hand on your stomach and feeling on it.
You didn’t feel beautiful no matter how much you were told. You tried eating less to lose weight but Gojo quickly caught on and told you eat as much as you wanted. You weren’t trying to purposely starve yourself but at the same time you were. The way you budge hung out and slouched was so unappealing. You didn’t know how you and Gojo were together. He was so lean and muscular. Strong and confident, such a mesmerizing man, truly.
But you, you weren’t anything of the sort. You were a bit shorter than he was, no muscles in sight, couldn’t pick up a weight even if you tried, and was a chubby mess who would eat day after day. Stressed? Eat. Bored? Eat. But, after you would eat, a twinge of guilt filled your mind. You impulsively grabbed the potato chips and after two bites you knew you should’ve took the grapes instead. It was too late now, you had to eat everything in the bowl. How dare you waste the food given? After all, you’re supposed to eat your plate clean or else you were just a selfish person.
You’ve been trying to restrict your eating but not too much so that Gojo would notice. You remembered when last week your heart stopped when he asked you a question. “Are you trying to starve yourself?”
You guys were sitting down in the dining room, on opposite sides of each other. He invited you over to try the food he cooked, he was trying to get better at making dinner. You stared at the food, the fork in your hand but not reaching for the plate. You felt yourself sweating, at the thought of trying to eat something. You glanced at Gojo who was almost halfway down his plate. To not be rude, your fork stabbed at a piece of the potato. Your lips curled up in cringe, your nose crinkling at the smell.
“Baby,” he spoke. It took your right out your thoughts, blinking as you snapped back into reality. You put the fork, gulping harshly and looking up at him. “Huh? Sorry, I was thinking about something. What’s up?” You asked, your mouth feeling dry and parched. “I’ve been trying to not assume anything, but are you starving yourself? You haven’t touched your plate, and whenever you come over to hang out you never eat any of the snacks I buy for you.”
He pouts a little but concern still filled his voice. “I was just thinking, maybe you don’t like the snacks anymore. But, you’re not eating anything at all. I’m worried for you, please tell me what’s going on.” He pleads, his full attention on you. You didn’t say anything, nothing at all. You only let out soft breaths through your mouth. You felt like the world was stopping. After the moments of silence, you cleared your throat. “I’m fine, Satoru. Really, I am. I’ve just been trying to get a little healthier with my food habits, okay?”
You put on a fake smile, nodding your head to nothing but your fake lies. “I don’t really wanna talk about this, can we just.. not?” You said lowly, you frowned a little, still picking at your food. Gojo nodded his head, “Yup, sorry ‘bout that. Just wanted to check on you..” He hummed. “I love you, baby.” He finally said before taking a chew. You couldn’t find it in you to reciprocate the words back. You just hummed and hoped he was satisfied with that answer, and he was.
Now here you are, staring at yourself in the mirror, not even able to put on clothes without feeling so suffocated and so restricted. You wiped your tears but your endeavors weren’t enough. You were supposed to be going out to dinner with your friends but you couldn’t even eat a proper meal, let alone eat a snack without having guilt right after it. You heard knocks at the door, Gojos voice being strung along. His hand twisted the doorknob, glancing at his unbutton shirt before staring at your sore and light red eyes. “Hey sweets! Are you almost ready? We have to go soo-”
He immediately panicked, he didn’t understand why you were crying and he was more concerned than alarmed. “Eh? What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” He asked, walking to embrace you, wrapping his arms around your figure. “Satoru..” you sniffled, “Do you think I am fat?” Your words slightly muffled and your tears making damp marks on his button up.
He raised a brow, he was gonna answer until he figured out what was going on. From the time you stopped eating your favorite snacks, the dinners and dishes he prepared, everything was adding up. You felt insecure, you felt disgusted with your own body. He had suspicions but he never would’ve actually thought that since you were the most ethereal person alive. He was more than lucky to have you. His expression softened, rubbing your back soothingly.
“You’re silly sometimes, you know that?” He tried to lighten the mood to the best of his ability. “You’re not fat, baby. But even if you were fat, would you think I would stop loving you?” He asked. So tempted to say yes, you just shut your mouth. “You’re the most beautiful woman I know, as if I know another woman who could top you.” He scoffed to himself.
He pulled you away for a moment, looking at you as you sniffed, tears still streaming down your cheeks. He kissed on your tear stained cheeks, tasting the salty tears. “I want you to know how much I love and care you for, sweets. You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me.” He reassured. “I love you for you, I love this body because it’s yours,” he placed his hand on your stomach. You cringed, but you allowed him to touch you. He placed a gentle kiss on your stomach before reaching up to cup your face.
“I love this face,” he kissed your lips, “because it’s yours.” He saw your tears run down slower, wiping them off with the flick of his thumb. “I will always love who you are, don’t mind if you gain or lose some pounds. You’re still hot.” He smiled, making you crack a smile and look away.
“See, so pretty when you smile.” He gave you another kiss on the cheek before looking at you. “Do you still want to go the dinner? Or do you wanna cuddle up, watch a movie?” He shook his head.
“Actually, let’s just do what you wanna do.”
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made by, tropicalszns, please do not copy, steal or repost my work without permission
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what-even-is-thiss · 10 months
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european here (genuinely curious): in reference to your “american home-cooked food isn’t just fast food, it’s a lot like french/italian food” post, could you give some examples? I don’t know what foods are american home staples, but your post piqued my interest
Well stews and soups for one. When I read recipes for stuff like beef bourguignon it’s quite familiar to me. Less wine perhaps but the principles of the dish are similar.
Italian-American food often also makes for easy quick food on weeknights. Pasta is something that can be just as easy or complicated as you want. You can make it from scratch at every step or just make sauce from canned ingredients and boxed pasta. Tomato paste, flour, pasta, and dried herbs are staples in most kitchens. Pretty much every household has their own way of making pasta sauces.
Roasts are popular during the winter. Both roasted veggies and roasted meat. Potatoes are popular year round but in the summer things like potato salad or fries or bagged chips are more common than stewed, mashed, or boiled potatoes.
Americans commonly cook with butter and olive oil, though canola oil is cheaper. In recent years though there’s been health questions about canola oil and some people only use it for deep frying now.
French cream sauces are pretty similar to American white gravy which we make with cream instead of milk. We do also make white sauce too and will put it on most things. I find it especially good on pizza instead of red sauce. A lot of people also put it on pasta or vegetables.
A lot of the way we eat potatoes is pretty similar to some French dishes. What we call scalloped potatoes is very similar to a French dish called potatoes au gratin. Not identical, but extremely similar.
Stuff like French onion soup and duck a l’orange is also decently popular here even if not everyday food and are things you’d more commonly make yourself than buy from a restaraunt.
French style breads and pastries are also quite popular here. Baguettes are common things to cut up to eat with dip. Croissants with coffee are common things to eat for a small breakfast or an afternoon snack. French style breads both sweet and not are also common breads used for sandwiches. Italian style coffee is also more and more popular these days but that wasn’t true until relatively recently.
A lot of similarities really lie in the ingredients we use. We often cook things in butter for example. Or add flour to stews to thicken them. Or add milk to things. Or use wine to deglaze pans for the flavor.
A lot of home cooking in the US is affected by other immigrant populations. Tacos or curry are staples in my diet for example. But when you get down to more traditional comfort food it’s potatoes, cream sauces, stews, herbs, roasts, and pasta. Stuff that’s not identical to French or Italian cooking but is very heavily influenced by it.
TLDR: It’s butter!
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menagerofmischief · 3 days
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Dia's Diner
Welcome to Dia's Diner, here you'll be able to order your meal (fic) with as many specifications and dishes as you want. We hope you leave satisfied ;)
first step is choosing who you want your fic to be about, so pick a server (you can even pick two)
SERVERS:
Max Verstappen
Charles Leclerc
Carlos Sainz Jr.
Lewis Hamilton 
George Russel
Lando Norris
Oscar Piastri
Daniel Riccardo
Alex Albon
Fernando Alonso
Franco Collapinto 
Pierre Gasly
Esteban Ocon
Ollie Bearman
Kimi Antonelli (?)
Sebastian Vettel
Mark Webber
Jenson Button
Toto Wolff
every good meal starts with an appetizer, by choosing your appetizer you're setting the main trope of the fic
STARTERS:
charcuterie board (dating)
artichoke dip (brother’s friend)
olives and cheese (friends to lovers)
stuffed cherry tomatoes (sugar daddy)
hummus nachos (teammates)
shrimp cocktail (rivals to lovers)
and how you want it served
HOT OR COLD: 
hot appetizer (sweet sex) 
cold appetizer (rought sex) 
now it's time to order the main dish, feel free to choose as many as you want
MAINS:
lobster (“I love watching my cum leak out from your pussy”)
caviar and oysters (“Gonna look so good full of my babies”)
fish and chips (“Where are your manners?”)
steak (“Made just for me. My pretty little cocksleeve”)
burger and fries (“Hurts? That’s too bad baby, should have thought about it before being such a slut”)
buffalo wings (“Count them for me”)
ramen (“What would your brother think if he saw us?”)
gyros (“Gonna fill you up”)
full english (“My pretty little slut”)
pizza (“My good girl”)
pesto pasta (“Slow down, you just told me to speed up. What’s it gonna be silly girl?”)
carbonara (“Look so good on my cock”)
sausage rolls (“I’ll make it fit”)
sushi (“Better quiet down, you don’t want them to hear us.)
tacos (“I’m gonna give you an attitude check”)
chicken quesadilla (“So pretty with my cock down your throat”)
crab cakes (“Yeah, gonna swallow like a good girl?”)
chicken nuggets (“Couldn’t help being a brat, could you?”)
kimchi (“Be a good girl and take it”)
tomato soup (“Running away from my dick? I don’t think so.”)
cheese fries (“I love making you squirt”)
stuffed potato (“Just where you belong … on your knees for me”)
sarma (“Gonna put a baby in you”)
moussaka (“You look your best covered in my cum”)
caesar salad (“Lie to me again and you’re not gonna like what happens next”)
chicken skewer (“Be a good girl and cum for me”)
mac and cheese (“Only good girls get to cum”)
mango sticky rice (“Next time you try that shit I’ll make him watch while I fuck you”)
chicken fingers (“Yeah, you like being filled in both ends like a slut”)
butter chicken rice (“If you want it then you better beg for it”)
eggs and bacon ("Are you gonna stop moving or am I gonna hold you down?")
spring rolls ("All you do is complain, perhaps I should shut you up")
sloppy joe ("You have the prettiest mouth. Why don't you put it to good use?")
kebab ("Look at that my cock is splitting you in half")
grilled cheese ("I buy you nice things and then I get to fuck you in them. Sounds fair to me")
pot roast ("You going to let me take my anger out on you, sweetheart?")
chili ("Look at you humping my thigh like a bitch in heat")
california rolls ("Scream my name - I want everyone to know who's making you feel this good)
PB&J ("Look at him while I make you cum")
dumplings ("Ride this cock - it's your cock")
black pudding ("There we good, you're such a good girl, taking you punishment so well")
smoked salmon ("My good girl deserves a reward")
fish tacos ("Just lie back and let me take care of you")
seafood boil ("Maybe I'll make a mix tape of your moans to listen to while I drive")
spaghetti with meatballs ("Why don't you put on that pretty little set I bought for you?")
veggie burger ("Feel how hard you make me")
hot dog ("Thought about you while touching myself. The real things is much better")
ratatouille ("I'll mark you up so much no man will dare talk to you again")
having a drink with your dish really elevates the experience, drinks represent different kinks
DRINKS:
ice tea (oral giving/receiving)
sweet tea (morning sex)
mint tea (body worship giving/receiving)
redbull (filming sex)
vodka redbull (squirting)
white wine (sir kink)
red wine (daddy kink)
rose (spanking)
champagne (threesome)
old fashioned (drunk sex)
whiskey (double penetration)
mai thai (mirror sex)
beer (bondage)
root beer (blindfold)
apple cider (spitting)
apple juice (edging)
orange juice (overstimulation)
boba (anal)
smoothie (hickeys)
matcha (toys)
vanilla milkshake (nipple play)
hot chocolate (dry humping)
espresso (dom/sub)
black coffee (chocking)
mocha coffee (degradation)
pumpkin spice latte (losing virginity)
fanta (size kink)
coca-cola (somnophillia)
coke zero (free use)
pepsi (car sex)
lemonade (public sex)
strawberry lemonade (breeding)
coconut water (jealous sex)
iced water (dirty talk)
to end the night you might consider getting a dessert, in this case dessert is aftercare
DESSERT: 
yes (aftercare included) 
no (aftercare not included)
special instructions: tell me your favorite track/race at the end of your request and I'll throw you in a freebie on the house that goes best with your order
Thank you for visiting! Here at Dia's Diner your pleasure is our priority, so be on the look out for new additions to our menu. Come back again.
A/N: I'm so grateful for each and every one of your requests, but I just ask that you be patient about waiting for it since I don't have much free time because of school.
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hopeful-engineer · 1 year
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🌞 Self-care vs. self-indulgence vs. avoidance
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Sometimes it may be a hard to swallow pill, but there's a difference between self-care and self-indulgence:
🍭 self-indulgence: spending too much money on stuff you want, but don't really need, like clothes you'll wear twice and then leave in your closet, where all they do is take up space, books you'll never read, subscriptions you'll forget about
✨ self-care: saving money; planning your budget; buying less, but better quality; thinking twice, before buying something you want, but don't need: "Will I really use it? Do I have enough money to buy it, without worrying, that I won't have enough to buy something more important? I want it now, but will I still want it tomorrow?" (note: I didn't write "don't buy anything except necessities" anywhere. Buy the stuff you want, but do it consciously, plan it and think before buying.)
🍭 self-indulgence: eating fast food and unhealthy snacks; drinking soda pop, energy drinks, tea with a lot of sugar, or too much coffee; adding sugar to everything; drinking too much alcohol
✨ self-care: eating as healthy as possible; learning to cook; avoiding fast food, sweets, potato chips and other unhealthy snacks; reducing your sugar intake; drinking water, fruit juices, tea without added sugar; planning your meals; buying natural food (note: It doesn't mean "never eat anything unhealthy again, never add sugar to anything, never drink alcohol". You can treat yourself with some pizza, or sweets, or beer sometimes, but it should be a treat, not part of your everyday meals.)
🍭 self-indulgence: staying up until 3 AM to watch films/series, play computer games, browse social media, chat with someone, or even to do something, that doesn't involve technology, for example draw or read books; sleeping until 11 AM, because you went to bed too late; sleeping 12 hours at the weekend, because you slept 4 hours a day during the week; hitting the snooze button; laying in the bed for too long after waking up
✨ self-care: fixing your sleep schedule; waking up earlier; going to bed earlier; sleeping 7 to 9 hours every day; avoiding all-nighters; having a fixed wake up time and a fixed bedtime, the same every day, including weekends; getting out of bed immediately when your alarm clock rings (note: I know there are circumstances, that can mąkę having a fixed sleep schedule is impossible, or next to impossible, I also know in some situations it's totally normal to stay up late, like you don't have to leave a party at 9 PM just because you want to stick to your sleep schedule, that would be unreasonable. Do it the best you can under your current life circumstances, and remember, this is about everyday life, not some rare exceptions.)
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There's also a difference between self-care and avoidance:
😨 avoidance: staying home all the time; not going to any events, because meeting new people is stressful; always declinig your friends' invitations
✨ self-care: not going to that big, loud party, because it's too overwhelming, but going to a pub with a few friends instead; inviting your friends to your home, when going out feels too stressful; declinig some invitations, when you don't have time and/or energy, but accepting others, when you feel better and have more time; gradually increasing the number of social interactions you have, to be able to meet new people with less stress
😨 avoidance: having no plans for the future; thinking, that there's no point in having any goals in life; telling yourself, that ambitions are generally pointless and hence you don't have to do anything and be good at anything
✨ self-care: having specific, short-term goals and an overall vision od your long-term future; knowing, what you really want to do and what you're good at, and sticking to these things; consciously choosing, what to learn and what to give up on, based on if it's important to you, not to other people; not distracting yourself with too many side plans, when you have one main goal; knowing, what is your passion and what is your ambition; knowing, that you are ambitious mainly for yourself, and only secondly for the society; believing, that you are capable of achieving your goals
😨 avoidance: not studying at all, because it takes time and energy; procrastinating until the last moment before the exam/test/project deadline; always talking the easiest way possible with no ambition beyond barely passing the exam/test; having no plan, no study schedule; never asking for help, even if you're failing, because you think asking for help is a shame, or you're simply too shy; dropping out of school/college because it's stressful
✨ self-care: knowing that you're studying for yourself, your grades don't define you and that real knowledge and skills are more important, than grades; focusing on these topics, that are important to you for your future studies/career, and being the best you can in these areas; being good enough to pass at everything, that isn't important for your future plans; planning your studying and starting early; taking regular breaks to avoid burnout; asking for help if necessary, but trying to do as much as possible and reasonable on your own; acknowledging that, despite the education system being flawed in so many ways, it also gives you many opportunities;
Of course, self-care includes bubble baths, eating cake, listening to your favourite music and slowly drinking tea, while watching the rain outside through the window and letting your thoughts wander, but these aren't only forms od self-care and definetely not the most important ones. Of course, sometimes it includes staying home with your cat instead of going to the party, sleeping in, instead of studying for an exam, because you're exhausted, or giving up on something, instead of trying again and again, but this should happen in some, specific situations, not be your default response. Real self-care should focus on improving your life, not escaping it or avoiding it.
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This post doesn't mean, I'm perfect at all of these things. Actually I struggle a lot with many of them. This is a piece of advice for me, too.
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guava-enjoyer · 11 months
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Inazuma School AU Headcanons!
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Featuring: Itto and Ayato (separately)
Summary: What are Inazuman characters like in school...as your lover!
Genre: fluff, crack
Warnings: implied fem!reader, inconsistent captalization, probably ooc because I haven't played in so long 😭, bad music taste
A/N: HELP this is my first time actually writing (finishing) a fanfic!!! If you happen to be reading this for whatever reason, just know that I take requests! I write for genshin and bsd right now. no smut!!! only fluff!!!
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Arataki Itto
where do i even start 😭
all the teachers HATE him because he never shuts up 💀
we all know that he is just naturally a menace (he's actually sweet i swear)
Itto is definitely playing a sport because he's so competitive. he's SUPER tall, so I'd say he's great at basketball. idk let your imagination run wild 😍
he'd blow a kiss to you every time he scores. its embarrassing, but you love him so it's okay.
i have two words: touchy-feely
he LOVES having an arm over your shoulder.
gives you questionable pet names
"hi my little sugar munchkin pookie bear 😘"
...ANYWAYS, he would definitely beetle fight you and gets salty after you obliterate him
"IMPOSSIBLE" *table flip*
okay enough silly i need to focus
he would listen to chill rock music. he'll give you an earbud and just chill with you, especially after his basketball practice or games
he would be failing all of his classes if it wasn't for you forcing him to study. he also needs decent grades to stay on the sports team so
"so, if you just subtract x here- are you even listening?????"
"huh?" *smack* "OW"
0/10 worst student
if you hang out with the Arataki Gang, even better! when you all eat lunch together, it can be chill
OR it can be pure chaos
"GIVE ME BACK MY POTATO CHIPS"
"NUH-UH"
y'all would definitely make fun of people. i can just imagine Itto ranting about how "Kujou KFC Sara" was being a bastard
"that stupid chicken thinks she's stronger than me!" (she is)
ok so far i've portrayed him as a menace but deep down he's a kind lil' muffin
he always makes sure you're not upset with his jokes, he would even offer you some of his lunch if you look sad!
he would go to energetic atmospheres for dates. to be honest, any atmosphere is energetic the moment he walks in.
ok but he would absolutely LOVE going to theme parks with you. he'd go on roller coasters with you and scream through the whole thing
if you don't like roller coasters, that's okay! he's still drag you around to do literally everything else in the theme park.
overall 7/10 chaotic but loveable
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Kamisato Ayato
(i have no idea what song suits him 😭)
he's like the rich and talented kid
he shows up to school in this really fancy car with a chauffeur and shit
straight A student, gifted, yk the whole package
Let's assume that he is the President of student government or council or whatever because... its Ayato what do you expect
teachers absolutely ADORE him
he'd definitely tutor you if you needed it but don't expect him to be a ray of sunshine
he loves you, but that only makes him even more insufferable 🥰
but like actually, he'd be so sweet. he's the kind of guy to bask in the little things.
i bet his love language is quality time. just being around you makes him melt internally
expect quiet dates. studying, libraries, cafes, etc. he LOVES THEM
he probably isn't big on PDA but still loves holding your hand. when you're alone, he loves having an arm around you. he just finds so much comfort in you <33
He also shows his love through nonstop teasing. It's a blessing and a curse.
"oh, aren't you cute today~"
right after you tripped and spilled coffee (or whatever else) all over yourself 😐
at least he gets you out of trouble 🤷‍♀️
he would also buy you expensive stuff. he's rich, remember?
like randomly he'll just walk up to you with designer jewelry or something
"...how much did this cost?"
"don't worry about it 😇"
and don't even try turning it down. he will find a way.
aside from all that, he definitely eats lunch in the library with you and/or Thoma and Ayaka
he'll force you to try his terrible food combinations 😭
"c'mon, just one bite. please?"
"...are you trying to poison me?"
he's not much of a sport person. with his upbringing, he might play an instrument. pianist Ayato anyone?? 😍
you'd just find him in the music room playing Chopin (I think he'd love Nocturne in E flat, its SO ROMANTIC. go listen to it, trust me)
compliment his music skills, it'll put him in a good mood for the day.
I give him an 8.5/10. A gentlemanly smartass.
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thanks for reading!! feedback is welcome!
have a good day :D
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luckystorein22 · 1 year
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chelleztjs18 · 1 year
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Night Time Shenanigans (W.M)
Wanda Maximoff x Female!AvengersReader
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Summary: A fun night time snack run with your girlfriend.
Warning: None. Just a fluffy one.
Requested: Yes
A/n: Knock knock! It's another fluff fic with Wanda here! Thank you Curious George anon for the help during the process of writing on this one especially the corny ideas. haha. Happy reading!
Main Masterlist
Pietro slowly parks the car at the parking spot of the store that you want to go to. “Okay, y/n, we are here. Are you sure you want to go inside? I don’t mind going and getting the snacks everybody wants.” His blue eyes look at you in the back seat through the mirror.
“Oh yeah, I’m fine. I’m okay. I can find all the snacks.” you answer drunkenly as you tap his shoulders then get out of the car.
“But, you are drunk, y/n.” you ignore Pietro’s disagreement despite you can hear it from the open window of his car. “Sestra, are you gonna let her go by herself?” He added the question towards her twin sister.
“Oh course not, Piet. I’ll go with her.” Wanda replies and gets out of the car to catch you up.
Surprisingly, the world has been in pretty good peace. No aliens nor villains attack whatsoever lately, so you and your teammates have been having chances to relax and spend time together. Tonight is movie night with some drinking of course and right now you are a little more buzzed than usual.
You scurry your steps while trying not to be obvious that you are searching for your balance at the same time. Your eyes actively search where the snacks aisle is because everybody craves potato chips which you don’t understand why they want salty snacks when they are drunk.
Unlike the others, you crave crackers and anything sweet. So when you find the crackers and cookies aisle, you definitely forget your main destination.
Meanwhile Wanda is looking for you as she pushes the shopping cart. She knows you very well by now from dating you for more than two years and she goes straight to where she is sure where you are at now.
“There you are. Detka, you didn’t wait for me. I was looking for you.” She says as soon as she finds you looking around for your favorite.
“Babe, we’re crack-a-lackin!” you exclaimed. You are a quiet person when you are sober but when you are drunk, not so much. Alcohol usually gives you more confidence and makes you more at ease. Caught off guard with your pretty loud pun at the silent store, it slows her brain down to process it. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion for a few seconds.
“Get it, babe? Crack-a-lackin? You know, cracker- lacking because they don’t have the crackers that I like.” you explained.
The brunette Avengers playfully rolls her eyes and holds a smile as soon as she understands what you were trying to say. “You and your puns.” she giggles.
“What about the crackers that I gave you two days ago, you liked that one.” your girlfriend suggests as she rubs your back gently. “Nope, they don’t have it either.” You continue walking through the aisle.
“How about your favorite chocolate cookies?” She pitches another piece of advice to you.
“No, Nada, zilch. I looked for that too. Is it a National crackers and cookies day or something? How come they don’t have the good stuff here, why did people buy them all?” You rambled and pouted at the same time.
“Well, we can try other brands of cookies or different flavors.” Wanda adds as her eyes try to find other cookies that you might like.
“How about this—” before even Wanda can finish her question, she gets interrupted with the fact that you are not there with her.
“Y/n?” With a deep sigh, she walks to find you.
_____
As luck would have it, you are only an aisle away from her. Her heart smiles when she sees you examining the sweets shelves with a bag of M&M chocolates in your hands.
“What you got there?” she asks.
“Oh M&M and you know what, Wands? I think I’m like M&M.” your hooded eyes look at her confused green eyes.
“And, why is that?” Wanda asks in bewilderment.
“Because I also melt in your hands.” you stated your corny lines with a wink as you put the bag of treats in the carts.
She instantly snorts a laugh. “Oh my god, y/n. That was so cheesy.” she shakes her head a little and follows where you are going.
Wanda stops to pick up some chocolaty goodies for herself. Then she hears some rushed steps only to find you run back to her and you hide both of your hands behind your back. All smiling like a proud little kid who has a surprise for you.
“What do you have in your hands, baby?” she asks shortly before you hand her a bag of Hershey's kisses. “Don’t ever say I never give you kisses.” you playfully declared.
Wanda can’t help herself to laugh and this time she laughs louder.
“Well then I would ask for some more right now.” Wanda excitedly demands with a teasing smirk followed by her index finger gently taps her lips. You lean to her, letting your face get closer. right when your lips get close enough to hers, you stop and say “Oh Wanda, of course you’ll get some more kisses, I can’t ever Reese-ist that.” You waggle your eyebrows in a frisky way.
Wanda lets out a pretend gasp as her cheeks slowly turn color to a rosie shade. She batted her eyebrows in disbelief followed by another laugh. “Oh–my–god, babe! Sometimes I forget how corny you are.”
You look at her, adoring her smile and every single feature of her face. Her laughter sounds like the most beautiful melody ever exists. “Gosh Wanda, you are so gorgeous.” it takes a second for your lips to reach hers. Both of you smile on each other's lips after the kiss.
“Y/n, sweetie. That was very lovely. As much as I love our kiss but we still have to get the snacks and chips for the others.” Her fingers fix your hair a little, she lovingly smiles. Helplessly, in love with you and your dorkiness.
“Ah, yeah, right. Snacks and chips. Oh take a look at this, Wands! I'll get this for Natasha." You agreed but a few steps after, you got distracted with something and it reminds you of your red haired best friend.
"Truffle? I don't know that Nat likes chocolate truffles." A line appears between her eyebrows, as she squints with confusion.
"I don't know if she likes them either. I'm getting this just so I can say 'I knew you were truffle when you walked in' to her when I give it to her later." You patch a smile talking about your plan with Wanda.
“Ouh yeah, that’s a good one. I wanna see Nat’s face when you do that. So yeah get that chocolate truffle babe.” Wanda looks as excited as you are now and she is fully on board with it and then the two of you wander around.
As both of you two reach the cereal aisle, without hesitation you turn your way in and your girlfriend patiently follows you. Her mind automatically put milk in her imaginary shopping list if you are getting some cereals as well.
Then suddenly you halt yourself. “Oooh, my love, look! This is so you!” You grab a box off the shelf.
“Honey Nut Cheerio? Why?” she tilts her head a little, her brain trying to solve your pun-puzzle like usual.
“Well, you are my Honey and sometimeeeess just sometimes you can be a little ‘Nuts’ or weird on certain thing BUT not in a bad way though. So you are my Honey Nut.” your fingers form an air quote at the word Nuts while you carefully explain what you mean on your joke.
Wanda laughs at your antics. “Ooookaaaay, that’s a funny nickname. I can live with that and you know what? that makes you my sweet corn-pun.”
“Excuse me? your what?” you playfully ask.
“My sweet is because I always call you that. Corn-pun is because your puns you gave me have been pretty corny and I love them.”
“Hey now, I’m not corny.” you pretend that you are slightly offended by showing the fake pout on your blushing face.
“Malyshka, I let you call me Nuts, so it will be only fair if you let me call you corny.” she giggles and winks at the same time.
“Ah, okay okay. Fair enough. Gosh your brother will make fun of me so bad if he knows you are calling me corny.” you agree in defeat.
“Oh trust me, y/n. He will.” Wanda tries to hold a laugh on the funny thoughts. With that the two of you proceed to the chips aisle.
You and Wanda grab the chips that everybody wants, you are sobering up a little and the cart starts to get full. You are glad that you went to the store with Wanda. Your girlfriend’s cheeks feel tired from smiling and laughing a lot because of your jokes and puns. It’s her reason why she loves you, you always make her laugh and smile no matter what. Both of you even forgot that Pietro is waiting in the car for so long already until the silver haired Sokovian calls his twin sister.
A call from Pietro and a few text conversations with Natasha later, Wanda can’t find you anywhere near her. Aisle after aisle, she searches for you. She keeps guessing where you would be but she has no luck finding you. She gives up and just right before Wanda decides to use her magic to find you, she remembers one last aisle that she is sure that’s where you are at now.
And, Wanda was right. She found you at the toy aisle, looking at two boxes of Lego sets on each of your hands. She noticed that you look as indecisive as you were when you tried to decide the matching tattoos you have with Wanda. She knows how much you love Lego and tattoos. You love them so much that you have too many choices to pick out.
“My sweet.” Wanda greets you as she smiles with such adoration.”
“Hm?” You answer knowingly it was her while you observe the two boxes in your hands. Your eyebrows furrowed, your gaze carefully bounced left and right.
“Getting yourself more legos? What are the choices this time?” Wanda asks as she stands closer to you and the boxes float in the air with her red magic tendrils around it so she can check out your dilemmas.
“Oh, I’m debating between these Bowser sets or the Electric Guitar one. Both of them will be so much fun to build but the Bowser one will take longer than the other one.” you explain and you start to pour a little.
“Aw pumpkin. Why don’t you get both of them? I have Tony’s card anyway.” Wanda casually pitches the idea.
“Well, it’s never really about the price, Wands. It’s more about how long it takes to get them done. Sometimes I want to finish it fast but not too fast either, you know.”
“But you like and you want both of them, right?” another question comes out of Wanda’s lips
“Uh, yes.”
“Well, in that case, we are getting you both of these sets. Take your time on building it and I will help you sometimes if you want, y/n. I love Legos too and you enjoy it when we are doing it together anyway.” Both boxes float away then gently land into the shopping cart.
“Let's start one of them tonight as soon as we get back at the compound.” Her face lights up with excitement. She is very much sure that you would love her idea.
“Oh yeah, that’s a great idea, Wanda. Sam and Bucky will pick the movie tonight and they always choose horror movies. You never like scary movies.” 
“Uh huh. So, let’s go. Before Pietro comes here looking for us and takes us to the car with his power.” Wanda grabs your hand and walks with you while her magic pushes the shopping cart around.
_____
“Your savior is here!” you exclaim as you walk in holding bags of snacks in one hand and your girlfriend’s hand in your other. All your teammates cheer for your arrival.
“Anyway, y/n and I decided to call it a night. We will just chill in our room.” Wanda announces with her obvious thick accent.
You hear them expressing their disappointment. “I know, I know but we don’t like scary movies and we know that Bucky and Sam will pick one plus I just got new legos.” You explain casually as you hand each of them their snacks and intentionally leave Nat’s snack as the last one to be handed out.
“Where’s mine, y/n?” Nat curiously peeks inside the bag then looks at you.
“Oh don’t worry Natty. Here you go.” you give her the snacks with a knowing smirk and being your best friend for years, she knows that you are up to no good. Even though you are a quiet person most of the time, you love joking around here and there especially with Natasha.
“What? What’s up with the smirk?” The red haired Avengers confidently shows her suspicions through her tone and question.
“Nothing. I got you some sweets too.” You pull out the chocolate truffles you got her and Wanda secretly excited to see how her reactions are going to be while internally holding her giggles.
“Awww, y/n, that’s so nice—” Natasha’s gratitude got interrupted by you.
“I knew you were truffles when you walked in, Nat.” you put them in her hand. Confused, Natasha’s gaze flicks between you and the truffles.
The team laughs at the same time with her finally realizing what your pun means.
“Haha. Very funny. You better run now Y/n, before I give you trouble and kick your ass!” Natasha plays along.
“Welp, gotta dash! Come on babe!” You grab Wanda’s hand then sprint to your room followed by Natasha.
Of course, your girlfriend came to the rescue. As she giggles at the situation, Wanda suddenly stops and uses her magic on Natasha. In a blink, Natasha floats and then lands on the couch as if she is held hostage.
“Wanda!! This is not fair! Let me kick your girlfriend’s ass!” You hear Natasha demand her freedom from Wanda’s magic.
“Sorry, Nat! Nobody can kick my Y/n. The magic will be gone in fifteen minutes.” Wanda answers from afar.
“What?? Oh come on! I can’t even eat my snacks and the freaking truffle for fifteen minutes?!” Natasha complains at the same time as the others laugh but you know she is far away from being upset with you, well you hope so.
“That was so funny. Come on detka, let’s build your legos.” Wanda laughs. She holds your hands and continues her power walk to your shared bedroom.
A/n: Welp, thats it for today! let me know what you think. Reblogs and comments are highly appreciated. Follow me for more. See you in next!
Cheerio!
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Have Your Cake And Eat It Too
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Chapter Nine of the Through the Scope series | Chapter Ten
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 5.5K
Chapter Overview: Wednesday brings a date and Friday brings an unwelcome fate
TW: Oral (f&m receiving), Fingering
Notes: hey everyone !! sorry for the delay to my unofficial posting schedule ! i was battling writers block and life threw a bunch of bullshit at me this week. in better news...i got a kitten today ! my friends were fostering four kittens and I fell in love with one and now we are basically soulmates. ANYWAY... there has been a small resurgence for my One Condition (reader x Din Djarin) fic recently which has made me smile ((: i updated the tag list so let me know if i missed you/ you want to be added ! as usual...my asks are always open & happy reading <3
*no use of y/n & female presenting reader*
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
Frankie’s house hasn’t been this clean since he first bought it. He isn’t a dirty man, he is probably one of the cleanest he knows if he's being honest, but suddenly everything looked dull compared to your sparkle. The chemical fumes from all of the products he is using have made him light headed. He just cracks open some of his kitchen windows and keeps on working. He has been deep in soap and suds since he got off work today at 7:30 P.M.. So far he has managed to vacuum off of the carpets and rugs, wipe down all the sinks and scrubbed the toilet (he even made sure to put the seat down), cloroxed the stove and the countertops, fluffed the couches pillows, and put fresh sheets on his bed.
Last night after his ‘work meeting’, he ran to the grocery store to pick up some ingredients for your date this Wednesday. You both decided on a quiet night in since your weeks have been surprisingly busy. Neither one of y’all had the energy to battle the busy crowds of a restaurant. He left the store with chicken, potatoes, asparagus, and some extra spices he didn’t already have. As soon as he got home that evening, he began making a marinade for the chicken so it could soak overnight. He spent his entire lunch break today sifting through dozens of different recipes on how to best prepare asparagus and calculating how much time he would have to put all the food together before you arrived tonight. When you texted him to confirm that 9:30 was still a good time for you to come over, he answered quickly saying ‘yes, but take your time closing with Benny’. He was filled with a combination of happiness and stress when you told him that Benny graciously told you that you didn’t need to help close tonight because you had a date. Damn, there goes the extra padding of time he thought he might have. He wanted to see you so badly, but he also wanted to be finished before you arrived so he wouldn't be distracted by cooking. You were the only thing that he wanted to give his undivided attention to. 
***
You’re practically vibrating in the front seat as you pull up to Frankie’s house. Much to your dismay, he refused to tell you what he was preparing for dinner. If you didn’t know what the two of you were eating, the option of buying a wine to pair with it was obviously out of the question. Well, when in doubt, make a chocolate chip bundt cake. Your only worry now is that he had already made something sweet. You park in his driveway like he told you and you take the cake’s carrying case from the passenger seat out of the car with you. After setting the dessert on the roof of the car, you look down at the casual dress you decided to wear. It’s comfortable and flowy which fits the warm Florida weather perfectly and the color of the fabric compliments your skin effortlessly. You didn’t want to over dress since the date is only at his house, but you still wanted to look nice for him to show that you care. Figuring that there isn’t any point in dwelling on your clothing choice since there is no time to go home and change, you pop your trunk to grab the overnight bag that you packed. Frankie not so subtly mentioned that by the time dinner was over it would be ‘too late to drive home’ and that it would be ‘much safer’ for you to spend the night. Who were you to argue with his bulletproof logic? You swing the bag over your shoulder, collect the cake, and walk yourself up to his front door. The mouth watering smells coming from inside have managed to leak their way past the door and tease you and your empty stomach. You knock with your foot as your hands are a bit occupied by what you’re currently carrying.
When he opens the door the two of you are quiet for a split second as you take each other in. His hair is on full display now with the absence of his cap. You suspect that it might have something to do with the shower he took. The ends of his curls are still damp from the water. He’s wearing jeans that you don’t think you have seen him in before and a crisp looking white henley. 
“Wow.” Frankie feels exactly the way he did when he first saw your photo on Benny’s phone. “You’re beautiful.”
“You don’t clean up too badly yourself.” You blush.
He leans down and kisses you, but as he pulls away you notice that he slipped the cake carrier out of your hand.
“Hey! You don’t have to-”
“But I want to. Remember?” He gives you a playful wink before waving you inside.
If you thought it smelled good on his front stoop, there are hardly words to describe how it smells inside. The whole house is warm with the scent of cooking chicken. It’s the kind of smell that feels like it's wrapping your whole body in a hug. While restaurants are wonderful, nothing compares to homemade cooking. The two of you walk into the kitchen and you spot an electric grill on the counter with four thick chicken breasts cooking on it. As you walk further in, you see that he has two trays of food heating in the oven. 
“You did all of this yourself? It looks amazing!” You say walking over to set both your purse and your overnight bag down by the couch. “Can I help with anything?”
“Uhhh,” An alarm goes off on the oven as he starts to flip the meat on the grill. “Actually, help would be great. Would you mind taking the potatoes and asparagus out of the oven for me while I handle this? I have mitts that you can use to grab them in that drawer right there.”
You locate the drawer and take out a set of oven mitts and two pot holders. The pot holders you place on the counter beside the oven so the trays will have a place to be set so they can cool. You open the oven and take each tray out carefully and set them down in their respective spots.
“Okay, what next?” You ask.
“I printed out the recipe I’m using for the asparagus. It should be over there by you.”
“You printed out the recipe?” You laugh, turning to look at the man next to you.
“What? I like to have a physical copy of things. The text on my phone is just too small to read sometimes and it's annoying that it turns off when I’m in the middle of looking at it.”
“Those aren’t bad reasons.” You confess as you pick up the paper. “Have you thought about getting glasses? You know, so you can see your phone better?”
“I don’t want to get glasses.” You have to stifle another laugh because he sounds like a grumpy child right now.
“And why is that?” You walk around him to grab the lemon in his fruit basket that the recipe calls for.
“They are going to make me look…” He mumbles the last word in the sentence so you can't hear it clearly.
“They are going to make you look what?” You press while slicing the lemon in half so you can squeeze its juice over the vegetables.
“Old.”
“Frankie!” You stop what you’re doing and face him directly. “You are not going to look ‘old’ with glasses! You aren’t even old to begin with.”
“I’m almost 45.” He counters. “Hold that plate for me, please.”
You do as he asks, but you aren’t done with this discussion. “I’m a few years shy of 30. Do you think I’m old?”
“No! Of course I don’t think that!”
“Then what’s your point? You only have a couple years on me.”
“A couple?” He raises his eyebrows.
“Shut up and finish plating the chicken will you? The bottom line is that you won’t look old. If anything you’re going to look even more handsome. I like the way glasses look on men.” You smirk.
“I’ll think about it.” He blushes. “For you.”
“Do it because you want to see, Frankie! Now help me over here.”
The two of you talk back and forth while you finish the asparagus and he prepares the baked potatoes. This is a different kind of intimacy than you are used to. The intimacy that you had come to associate with partners was skin on skin contact and hands tangled in hair, but this is seemingly more personal. You could have sex with anyone you wanted at any time you wanted, but fucking someone doesn’t make you compatible with them. You don’t have to talk during sex, like really talk. Standing shoulder to shoulder with someone while you cook and casually talk about summer vacations you each went on as children or pets you had growing up was intimacy that you didn’t know you were lacking, that you were craving. This was the kind of intimacy that you only thought lived in between the pages of a book. 
“Oh my God! This is so good! I haven't eaten like this in forever!” 
Dinner finally found its way to each of your plates along with a cold beer to wash it down. 
“It’s just a hobby, but I’m glad you like it.” He smiles, cutting another bite of food for himself. “The guys and I sometimes take turns cooking dinner when we go over to each other's places when we watch the game or before beach trips.” 
“Benny was telling me about those a few weeks ago actually! He said that y’all haven’t had one in a while because life has gotten in the way. What would you say if we went during a weekend in March? My friend Robbie, the one I told you about last weekend, is coming down to visit me then and what better way is there to introduce her to Florida?”
“That sounds really nice. It will be great to go with you, Robbie, and the guys. God knows we could all use a break.”
Speaking of the guys,” Questions that have been plaguing you since you first looked at the contents of his room swim to the tip of your tongue. “What did all of y’all do when you were in the service? Like your jobs?”
“What a question.” He reclines back in his chair. “Let’s see…Pope was the man with the plan. He was always plotting the best entry and exit point for us on missions. He was usually the one that found us the job in the first place too. Will was the one who kept us all on task and on time. I've never met another person alive who keeps track of things the way he does. He has actually kept count of every single speech he has given at the VA.” He chuckles.
“Why am I not surprised?” You love how he looks when he is discussing his friends. He’s so full of love and pride.
“Benny was the guns. We can all shoot really well, I mean that's what we were trained to do, but Benny can shoot ridiculously well.” He stops to take a sip of his beer. “We had a captain as well. His name was Tom, but he was Redfly to us. He was the one who led all of the missions we went on.”
“Is that the man in the group photo that you have in your bedroom?”
“You saw that, huh? Yeah, that’s him. He,” Frankie clears his throat. “He moved away about a year ago and unfortunately we fell out of touch. But, that's what all our jobs were.”
“And you?” You’re resting your head in the palms of your hands with the look of curiosity painted across your face. ‘What did you do?”
“I was- I was the pilot. Whatever needed to be driven or flown on a mission, I was the man to do it. Vehicles are nice, don't get me wrong, but flying? God, there isn’t anything else like it in the world.”
“What does it feel like?” Your dinner grows colder, but your heart grows warmer as he talks. 
“I don’t think I can do it justice, but I’ll try. When I’m in the cockpit of a helicopter, I feel so at peace. It sounds weird to say that operating a machine that weighs tons of pounds can give me that feeling, but it's the truth. Nothing can take it away either. Not the guys yelling over the headsets that we have to wear inside, not the chaos of whatever mission we are currently on, not even the millions of beeping sounds coming from the controls. It's just me and the open sky.”
“What’s been your favorite view?” You could listen to him talk about this for hours.
“Apart from the one I currently have right now? That's going to be hard to pick.” You have to temporarily look away from him to hide how hard you’re blushing at his comment. “I would have to say it was when I was piloting a helicopter over some mountains. The mountains themselves were beautiful, but as soon as we got close enough, the sun peaked out from behind them. It made the mountains look like they had halos.”
“I would give anything to see something like that.” You say wistfully.
“I could, if you wanted, show you sometime.”
“Oh my God! Really? Frankie, are you serious? You would do that?”
“Of course I’m serious! I want you to experience it first hand.” His million dollar smile slips for a fraction of a second. “It might take me a while to get my hands on a helicopter though.”
“I don’t mind waiting.” You rest your hand over his on the table. “At the risk of sounding corny, the best things in life are always worth the wait.”
“I couldn’t agree more.” He turns his hand over so that your palms are touching. “Do you want to cut some slices of cake and curl up on the couch to watch some TV?”
He takes your squeal of excitement as a ‘yes’. You work together to pack up all of the leftovers and load the dishwasher. He tries to cut the cake himself, but you shoo him away.
“You have done enough work for one day. Let me take care of the cake at least. Why don’t you go relax on the couch and find something for us to watch?”
You cut two hearty pieces and set them on plates for the both of you. It's shocking how natural it feels to exist with him like this. There isn’t a label on what y’all have, but you don’t mind right now. All that matters is that you’re enjoying yourself and you wouldn’t want to spend your Wednesday night any other way.
“Alrighty.” You set down the plates along with two forks on the coffee table. “What did you find?”
“How do you feel about Narcos Mexico?
“I’ve been meaning to start that one actually!” You plop yourself down on the couch next to him. “Robbie and I binged Narcos when it first came out. We finished it in a matter of days. It was probably a little unhealthy now that I think about it. She had the biggest crush on Murphy, but I was partial to Peña.”
“Should I be worried?” He hits play and adjusts his arm so that it drapes over the back of the couch. His fingers are able to brush over your collarbone rhythmically. 
“I wouldn’t say so.” You look up at him. “Lucky for you, I prefer the real thing over something fictional any day.”
“Lucky for me indeed.”
He takes the hand that is toying with your collarbone and uses it to gently tilt your chin up towards him. Your lips are captured by his in a kiss. Without warning a low moan comes from your throat. It had only been two days since he had touched you last, but why did it feel like a lifetime? His free hand slides up your thigh, taking the hem of your dress with it. He can feel your pulse quicken and your breath hitch when he moves your underwear to the side and starts to rub circles on you. His voice is strained and raspy when he speaks to you.
“I missed the way you felt around my fingers, mi estrella.” One of his fingers finds its way inside of you. “So tight I can barely move.”
His words have you clenching around him and gasping for air when you feel yourself stretching to allow another finger in. Your back arches off the couch as he makes contact with the spongy spot inside you. 
“Do you know what you’re doing to me? I could hardly get any work done these past few days because you’re all I can think about.”
Your head falls back against the plush pillows of the couch. He presses sloppy kisses along your jawline as your mouth parts to allow shallow breaths and quiet moans to escape. 
“Look at this beautiful neck.” His tongue charts a warm, slick path up it. “God, I wonder what it would look like with my hand wrapped around it?”
You stretch your neck out for him as if to silently say ‘come and find out for yourself’. 
The hand that he initially used to tilt your head up comes to snuggly wrap around your throat. With each squeeze, pump of his fingers, and rub of your clit you can feel yourself start to gradually lose control. 
“That’s it, pretty girl. I want you to soak my fingers.”
Even with his hand restricting your airway, your moans have gone from quiet to boisterously loud. You can hear him groaning in your ear as he watches his fingers disappear inside your wet pussy over and over again. 
“That feels so fucking good.” You gasp out.
You can feel your legs starting to shake and the fire in your lower belly aching to be put out.
“Let go for me.” He whispers.
You cry out as your orgasm rips through your body. He guides you through your bliss with honeyed words.
“So fucking pretty coming all over my fingers. Such a good girl for me.”
When he reluctantly takes his fingers out of you, you grab his wrist with your hand and bring his drenched fingers to your waiting lips. You can see him watching you with lust clouded eyes from your peripheral vision as you take them in your mouth. You allow your tongue to glide across and lick them clean of the mess that you just made. After you are content with your work, you pull them from your mouth with a satisfying pop and lazily roll your head so you can face Frankie. 
“It’s your turn.”
“Oh?” He’s breathing almost as hard as you are.
“I want you in my mouth next.”
“Oh.”
Without breaking eye contact, you lower yourself onto your knees and situate your body in between his legs. He scoots down deeper into the couch and opens his legs wider. His lids hang low on his eyes as he undoes his belt for you. When he’s done, you take over by unbuttoning his jeans and pulling the zipper down. Your mouth starts watering when you pull him free from his boxers. As you take him in your hand a guttural moan comes from the man in front of you. You tap the tip on your tongue a few times before wrapping your lips around it. Beads of pre come dissolve in your mouth as you begin to suck.
You take your time with him. Only taking him deeper into your hot mouth every once and a while. His hand comes up to pull your hair out of your way. His words go from slurred to unable to understand when you attach your lips to his balls. Your hand continues to pump him while you kiss and suck below the shaft. His thighs twitch and jerk with every touch you grant him. Licking a long stripe up his length, you connect your mouth to him again while your hands work in tandem. You dare to take a peek at the man coming undone above you. God, he’s breathtaking. Once perfect hair, now going every which way, sweat making his forehead shine, and plump lips being pushed out by his ragged breathing. You can feel yourself grow wet for him all over again. 
“Fuck, I love the way you look with my cock in your mouth.” He fumbles out. “It feels like your mouth was made for me.”
Even with your hollowed out cheeks beginning to burn, you keep pushing yourself. You want him to feel as good as he makes you feel. When his stomach starts to heave, you know he’s close. You take him all the way down your throat. The coarse hair at his base brushes against your nose and you can feel tears trickling their way down your cheeks. 
“I’m gonna come.” He speaks frantically.
You place your hands on his thighs and keep him deep inside your mouth. Immoral sounds erupt from him as he spills down your throat. You hum as you feel it going down. You pull off of him, but softly lick him clean as he lays disheveled against the cushions. He watches with intense infatuation as you use your finger to gather some of him that is left on your lower lip and push it to your tongue. You smile contently at him as he reaches down to pull you into his lap. He wastes no time tasting himself on you. In some possessive corner of his brain, he can’t help but feel like you are his now. He hasn’t said it out loud yet, but he hopes you can feel the genuine care he has for you in the way he kisses you. He hopes you can feel it in the way that he touches you. 
“Let’s go to bed.” You breathe into him.
“Something tells me we won’t be getting much sleep.” He says standing with you in his arms. “I don’t mind one bit.”
***
The majority of your Friday shift is spent selling tickets for the fights this evening. You were excited to attend this week's match on Frankie’s arm. Honestly, you were excited to see Will and Santi as well. Between juggling your dad and trying to see Frankie as much as possible, you hadn’t had any quality time with your other two friends. 
“I have a problem.” Benny pokes his head around the brick wall that separates you from the rest of the gym. “But I think you can solve it. If you don’t kill me first that is.”
“I feel like I’m going to regret asking this, but,” You spin your chair around to face him. “What can I do for you, Benny?”
“So you know my regular ring girl? The one that has those cool purple streaks in her hair?” You nod in confirmation. “Well, she just texted me sayin’ that she has the flu.” 
“You’re kidding.” You know exactly where he is going with this.
“I wish I was.” He’s now standing awkwardly in front of you. “However, like I said before, I think you can help me.” 
“Are you asking me to be your ring girl for the night?” 
“Please!” He has his hands clasped together as if he’s praying. “It would only be for one night! I know that you were plannin’ to hang out with the other guys, but I really need you!” 
“Benny, I- I don’t even have clothes to wear.” You gesture down to your current attire. “I don’t think this would suffice.” 
“That’s where I come in.” He says proudly. “My other ring girl is about the same size as you and the new outfit that I ordered for her just so happened to be delivered to my house last night.”
“You’re the one that orders the outfits?” 
“Well, she technically picked it out, but I just ordered it so I could put it on the company card. So, what do you say?”
“Let me see the outfit first.”
Much to your chagrin, he heads back into his office and comes back with the package and a pair of black thigh high boots. “Go change! I’ll be waitin’ right outside for you!” 
You snatch the items out of his hands and head back into the locker room. As much as you hated that so few women came to the gym, it was nice to have the whole room to yourself. You set the boots on the ground and tear open the package. The top is an extremely high cropped white collared shirt that ties in the front and the skirt is pleated with a red and black checkered pattern. You can’t do anything else but laugh when you finally pull the fishnets out. The things you do for friends.
“Okay! I’m coming out!”
Benny can hear you before he sees you. Your new heeled boots echo throughout the locker room as you exit.
“God damn.” He lets out a low whistle. “Fish is one lucky man.” 
“I feel like Britney Spears in her ‘...Baby One More Time’ music video.” You rest your hands on your hips.
The skirt's short length is accentuated by the fishnets and how tall the boots go up on your thighs. The shirt’s tie sits above your belly button. This whole look leaves very little to the imagination.
“Well, I think you look great!”
“It’s not too much?” You twirl to give him a 360 view. “It’s kinda fun to wear.”
“See?! I promise it’s just for tonight, unless you want to give it another go?” 
“Let’s just take it one week at a time, okay?”
“I can live with that.” 
He starts to head to the front desk when the doorbell chimes out, but you call after him.
“Benny?”
“What’s up?”
“Can you- I don’t really know how to ask this- can you watch me tonight? Like make sure no one tries to bother me?” 
His face softens at your request. You know that he understands who you’re talking about. “I promise that the guys and I won’t let anythin’ happen to you. You’re our girl and we’ll watch you like a hawk.”
“That means a lot to me.” 
You hurry yourself back into the sanctuary of the women's side of the locker room before you give the guest waiting at the front desk a preview. Before you take your new outfit off you take a picture of yourself and send it to Robbie. She responds by firing off multiple messages that should never be allowed to see the light of day. Robbie always had a unique way of making your ego flair up. Armed with your newly gassed up confidence, you send the picture to Frankie. He responds almost instantly.
Frankie: What are you wearing?
You: What? You don’t like it?
Frankie: I never said that.
You: Benny’s usual ring girl is sick. You’re looking at Brass Knuckles ring girl for the evening.
Frankie: I’m looking alright. I hope Benny knows that he’s not getting that outfit back after tonight. 
You: And why is that?
Frankie: Because I’m going to tear it off of you piece by piece. There won’t be an outfit to give back.
You rub your thighs together anxiously as you see another text bubble pop up.
Frankie: How am I supposed to focus for the next few hours with this photo of you living in my head?
You: You better figure it out because if you don’t, you will be to busy playing catch up to fuck me after the fights.
Frankie: You’re going to be the death of me, you know that?
You: I know (:
Giggling to yourself, you change quickly so you can resume desk duty. Hopefully you can stay focused for the rest of the day despite Frankie’s words swimming around in your mind. 
***
You and Benny see the guys pull into the parking lot in their respective cars 15 minutes after closing. 
“Would you look at that? They actually got here on time to help.” Benny hums as he throws the last of the dirty towels into the basket.
“I’m gonna go say ‘hi’!” You shout over your shoulder, already darting towards the front.
You bust out the door right as the group of three are walking across the middle of the parking lot. 
“Hey Will! Hey Pope!” You rush out as you make a beeline for the man in the center. 
You leap into his arms and wrap your legs around him while snuggling your face into the crook of his neck. His exuberant laugh reverberates through your whole body as he clutches onto you. If it were anyone else, you would feel foolish for greeting them like this. But it just feels so right to be held in his arms. It doesn’t matter where you are. You feel him let out a heavy sigh into your hair as he cups the back of your head with his hand.
“What the fuck are we? Chopped liver?” Pope jokes. 
“I totally greeted you, you whiny baby.” You laugh, face still hidden from the world.
“Who are you calling a ‘whiny baby’?” 
You turn to face him, already knowing that he has his hands on his hips. “You!”
“You hearing this shit?” He turns to Will who has been silently snickering.
“Every word of it, Pope.” Will comes up and pats you on the back. “Good to see you, hon.”
“You’re going to let her talk to your best friend like that, Catfish?” Pope pouts. 
Frankie carefully sets you down and readjusts his cap. “I couldn’t control her even if I tried.” He shrugs. 
“Come on, Pope.” You lightly push him in the shoulder. “You know I love ya’.” 
Before he gets a chance to respond, a car pulls into the lot extremely fast. Frankie quickly scoops you up and moves over to the side of the parking lot that is closest to Brass Knuckles. You didn’t even have time to process what had just happened, yet the rest of them reacted just as quickly as Frankie did. 
“What kind of idiot drives like that?” You say, trying to get your bearings as you feel your feet touch asphalt again. 
“The kind of idiot with a bone to pick.” Pope mutters. 
When you look around, all three of them are watching the car park in a spot that's a few spaces down from theirs. Nervousness starts to rear its ugly head when you see them all exchange quick glances, followed by nods of their heads. Will is the first to break the silence.
“Why don’t we go inside?” His eyes look like they are pleading with you. “You can show me what still needs to be set up before people start arrivin’ tonight, huh?”
“Wait, what?” 
“That sounds like a good idea.” Frankie confirms, his gaze still fixed on the now unmoving car. He doesn’t sound like himself. “Take her inside.”
“Frankie? What’s going on?” 
He must have heard the quiver in your voice because he turns his attention to you. “I’ll be there in 5 minutes. I just need to take care of something first, okay? Everything is fine.”
“Let's go, hermosa.” You feel Pope's hand come to rest softly on your shoulder. “Please.” He whispers in your ear. 
You have never seen any of them act like this. It’s causing your stomach to turn violently. Three of the toughest men you have ever met getting skittish doesn’t sit right with you. 
“Al-alright.” Pope pushes your body towards the door, but your eyes stay on Frankie. “I’ll be right inside if you need me.” 
“I know, estrella.” A car door slams hard somewhere in front of y’all and his face hardens. “Get her the fuck inside the gym.” 
For the third time in a matter of a few minutes you’re being carried. This time it is compliments of Will. Before you know it, you’re being ushered inside and taken back into the gym. Neither Will nor Pope stop until they approach Benny who is in the middle of cleaning the heavy bags. 
***
The only thing that matters to Frankie is that you’re away from the catastrophe that he knew was about to ensue. He steels his emotions as he watches her round her car from the driver's side. With how quickly she is marching there should have been flames kicking up behind her.
“Francisco fucking Morales!” She screeches. “We need to talk!”
He starts walking towards her. “Yes, Rochelle. We do.”
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
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Harley Quinn adores you! Harley Quinn headcannons (Part 4)
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“Ohhhh honey butter sweet thiiinnnng!!” Harley sang. “I did some food shopping!” Harley sang.
You were in the shower washing your hair. About 20 minutes later you dried yourself off changed your clothes.
Harley took all the snacks out both bags and put them on the table. And I mean all over the table in the kitchen.
You opened the door and saw your girlfriend. “Hii baby”. You said. You smiled.
”Baby cutie lover!” Said Harley. She ran to you and hugged you. You hugged her back. “I got us food did some food shopping”. Harley said to you.
You smiled. “Oh good. What’d you get for us?” You asked.
”Come see! Come, come”. Harley said to you. She grabbed your hand and walked you over to the kitchen table.
And there it was. Lots of snacks.
”W-wow. That’s uh a that’s a lot of snacks”. You said.
”Yeah”. Said Harley said. “We have snacks for daaayyyssss”. Said Harley. She clapped her hands together and rubbed her hands together like a crazy person.
”Babe?” You said.
Harley looked at you. “Yes sweet lady?” She said to you.
“When I asked you to go food shopping I meant to buy us actual food. To cook and to eat. And this is all snacks”. You said.
”Oh”. Said Harley. “Sorry”. She said. She opened a bag of potato chips and started to eat a few chips. She even fed you a couple chips.
”Harley opened up a bag of twizzlers. “Twizzlers?” She said to you.
”No that’s okay. Thank you though”. You said. “I’ll go food shopping later on today. What do you think we should cook?” You asked.
”Meatloaf with mashed potatoes!!” Harley said.
”Excellent choice”. You said.
Harley winked. “I got good taste”.
Harley loves to eat all your peanut M&Ms late at night
And when you’ve had a long day looking after her because bad guys are after Harley she will give you a back massage
She taught you to fight
And when the bad guys were after Harley after she took the keys and drove the bad guys car because they’re trying to take Harley’s medallion that belongs to the joker
The joker saw you and Harley and you gave him his medallion but right before you beat him up for insulting your girlfriend
And you and Harley grabbed a bat each other and the bad guys ran away
She Can’t keep her lips off your lips
She loves how good your hair smells and she loves to smell your hair
Harley loves to wrap her hands around your waist always loving how good you look
She will blow you kisses always
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