#but. i don't wanna give amazon my fucking money!

[showyoumyfavoriteobsession]

why. is it nearly impossible to legally buy drm-free music anymore

[austinsastrology8991]

Mercury in da HoUSe (s) mercury and why you think your smart - you only think your smart, you don't even know if you are because you can't think any other way. I dont care if people tell you your smart, they don't even know if they are smart because they have the same dilemma as you....... but if you think your dumb your probs right.... okay enough chit chat we gotta do some astrollogy >> Mercury in the first - These guys talk the talk, hella good at talking, talk too much, but at least they know how to talk. but it gives everyone in the rooom a headache. also there voices go a million directions... they like to put on voices. actually i hate your voice. its too earpiercing its like your looking at there voice even if you look away. how are you able to make me look at yo voice, its meant to be auditory but i can fucking see it STFUUUU Mercury in the second - I like money but not as much as this guy. this guy will think of every scam, every business every investment possible just to prove his worth (typically with money) as kids they are hustlers with money, everyone knows they gonna make coin, but typically as they get older, money don't mean shit to them and they start investing into something substantial and if they dont grow outta this mindset, they become shells of themselves like bill gates or the amazon guy. mercury in the third - okay these guys are actually smart, but its almost hard to tell. because there intelljgence isn't attached to anything beside intelligence itself. so its hard to notice, but they are very smart people. quick learners but i notice not quick thinkers, or at least they don't voice it much. which i guess makes them smart because they ploying liek dat mercury in the fourth - subtle intelligence, almost manipulative intelligence, they are the types to make you make a point jsut so they can point out the flaws in your point rather than make a argument themselves.... then make an argument once yours has been smashed to pieces. assholes honestly... but i rate it its just smart tactics but make em talk first and they speechless lmao mercury in the fifth - funny yes your funny, yes i see what you did there, oh yes this next joke is also funny because it ties in with your last joke.. did i mention your funnY? oh im not that funny, well im sorry i can't do it like you becayse yourr liek for real funny. okay can someone else speak now, this guys voice wasn't annoying but now it is. fr comedians but every comedian over do it, and so do they mercury in the sixth - annoying intelligence, always pointing out the flaws in whatever the fuck you just said. like dude im trying my best to think, to then speak it, and to respect you as a person. and your lookjing for flaws, in my speech? oh you can't help it? well i can't help but not wanna talk to you. annoyingly nitpicky with what i say you say she say, why so serious? oh your too smart? thats what every dumbass has ever said to me stfu. mercury in the seventh - always on your back, but can you get off my back, im still working on my argument i dont need you to suck me off about it jeezes. id rather you criticize me honestly. oh now your critical of me. well why can't you just think for yourself. oh you don't know how to. you only don't know how to because you just wanna learn more and more and more and more and more. and now you dont know how to think for yourself. congrats you played yoself mercury in the eighth - so mysterious wow so profound, i never saw it that way. no you just were thinking of something cool to say this whole time and you jsut thought of it. your only quiet so you dont look like a fool. insecure bitch ass. oh but now you just wanna insult me yeah thats because i called you out. honestly these guys are just looking for a deep chat, and its only deep because they were digging for so long.

mercury in the ninth - these guys know way too much bullshit. like they read a lot and just spit random facts and its hard to talk to them without feeling patronized. like yeah we get it, you read a lot. most peole don't because we like to be a human, not live in a book. go outside its nice. oh thats where you get your information > outside, books, the world is your dictionary - god you really are annoying. oh you knew that already. fuck off man.

mercury in the tenth - shrewd; always thinking and saying the best possible thing to say for each scenario, and its typically just sayings they read in hustler books, or what they dad said once. yeah your street smart, but no one else advertises it as much as you, which means you don't understand the streets as well as you think. yep thats right re-strategise; they just wanna own the streets i swear. and no one tries as hard as them. and thats saying something mercury in the eleventh - stop protesting you mong, you really think convincing us the realities of the world, will change the world? oh itll start the butterfly effect, okay true go on, tell us how eating veggies gonna stop the meat industry. oh you were just saying this crap for bants. yep that was annoying. oh now you wanna talk about how attitudes has shaped the world, dude why you always trying to integrate everysingle philsophy of the world into one conversation. you do realise its all bullshit? but everyone likes em because they invite everyone in on the conversation... hey someone gota do it Mercury in the twelfth - these guys are the worst i swear, cant be more manipulative than these lot, they will act innocent, but come at you aggressivly, and itll just confuse ya. youll think they just dumb and naive but they klnow damn well what da hell they doing. play yo game with someone else... oh you don't like to play with them because they fall for your shit, yep so you only like people who set you straight ehhhh you should just come at me straight or ill set you straight. oh you just struggle with convos well it shows.

[orionsangel86]

Yo so never let anyone police or guilt trip you when it comes to how you spend your own hard earned cash.

Do what you want with your money. No seriously. Sure there are more morally correct ways to spend your cash, just as there are morally repugnant ways to spend it. But the point is its YOURS so you can do what you like with it.

Don't let self righteous people on tumblr tell you you are a bad person for not giving every penny you own to charity, or for daring to buy fast fashion rather than ethically sourced clothing, for shopping at Amazon Prime instead of small businesses. For wanting to purchase CRABS on tumblr for the fun of it on a dedicated fun day for crabs.

Remember how in the Good Place literally everyone was going to Hell because they lost "good points" even by just buying tomatos? We can't win. The world is fucked up. As much as "every little helps" its also a drop in the ocean of fuckery caused by the 1% at the top. So live your lives, and if you wanna buy fucking crabs buy the fucking crabs. Give money to this website to keep it running if thats what you want to do, or don't, if you dont want to. Your money. You choose how to spend it.

Enough with the stupid discourse now. Do whatever you want always.

I'm probably gonna buy some dumb crabs. If you have a problem with my buying dumb crabs, block me. I really dont give a shit.

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

Anything scruffy!vere. i miss them

"I hate this."

"Pockets you look fine," Jason said, tugging the strings on your sweater.

"I look huge-"

"No," he said, "You don't. You look healthy and just a little... fuller figured." He supposed it shouldn't be a shock. Getting you on medication meant side effects. And now you cycled between having no appetite and starving. That combined you being an adult and not a kid anymore meant you'd gained weight. It also didn't surprise him that you had issues with it. You were used to being smaller. But if he was being honest, you looked healthier this way.

"Plans are canceled I'm fat-"

"No," Jason said firmly, "You're just a little plump. And it's nice." He hugged you against his chest and kissed your head. "I can bench press the sofa. 20 or 30 pounds doesn't mean much."

You whine and he kissed your forehead tilting your chin up, "Honestly," he said crossing his heart. "You look fine. But if you think working out would help you, you know I love me an Amazon-"

"Jay."

"Just saying. I don't give a fuck what you look like as long as you're healthy and happy. This makes you unhappy, and even if I don't mind- you do and it makes me unhappy. Because you're beautiful."

You sigh and nod, thudding your head against his chest.

"Let's just go see the family, huh? Bring your guitar and we'll just go chill out."

_____________

"That sweater is so fucking cute," Stephanie said, "I love it where did you get it?"

"A thrift store I think," you answer, picking a fuzz off your sleeve. "Manic me just likes shopping."

"And sick guitar riffs," Duke said grinning, dropping onto the couch next to you.

"That one wasn't mine though," you tell him, taking a sip from your mug and letting Steph pull you against her side so she could examine your sweater. She liked to cuddle people who looked warm.

"Who wrote it then?" he asked, interested.

"Her mom," Jason answered. "The one thing Nissa was good at was music."

"Oh- I-"

"It's okay. I've been retooling a lot of her stuff. Especially the stuff she never got to use really."

"That's cool," Duke said, not sure what else to say. He knew parents were never a good subject in this house.

"I brought my guitar-"

"Did I hear Guitar?" Dick said, strolling in "Because if you wanna play me some Fleetwood Mac I'd marry you like tomorrow-"

"Hey!" Jason protested, reaching behind him to grab the hard case there he'd set it. Smiling a little at the stickers as he set it down in front of you. He knew that guitar as well as he knew Scruffy. And he couldn't count the number of times you'd both set on the steps in the train station, trying to make enough money to get a good meal.

"Yeah!" you echo, holding out your hand to show him the engagement ring.

"Papers ain't signed," Dick said teasing, dodging the pillow Jason threw at him.

[chaisshitposts]

hi love if you don’t mind can you go in more detail about the time you entered the void and manifested your job? what was your mindset like before you entered? what do you think helped you enter? i’m in my 20s as well and really want to at least get my dream job first of all things and then i feel like i could finally relax you know? :( so your help would be greatly appreciated����

also i think your followers are really nice and mature so when i do tap in, i wouldn’t mind affirming (everyone who likes my success story and has good intentions will enter roe)

sure! let's see if I can remember as many details as possible— it was a couple days after I had my job interview, I had already been affirmin' my ass off that that job was mine and no one could take it from me— on this particular day, I think it was a Sunday. the lady who interviewed me said I would get my answer on the followin' Wednesday, and god that stressed me out, but I still kept affirmin'. on that day, I felt an extreme sense of drowsiness and so I had went to try and sleep in my bed. I already knew about SATs and whatever so I thought I could just affirm as I go to sleep, which I did. I was 'asleep' but I was still repeating my affirmations over and over, only focusin' on them while I was physically tossing and turning. Since I was tryna sleep, my eyes were already closed and it was silent in my room so ig I just didn't care about my surroundings. I do, however, remember that at some point I was affirmin' and was fully aware of my affirmations but then somethin' changed inside me and I was like 'Its done, nothing more for me to do, I don't wanna stress over this anymore. I can't sleep so, might as well just go back downstairs.' Then I opened my eyes and got up, feeling my stress about everything completely gone.

I went downstairs, right as my ma sat down after gettin' a package off the porch and that's when she gave me my new phone. (I still live with my family, yes, but only bc california is a dirt bag ofc) And I kid ya not, a couple minutes after I opened up the box with my new phone in it, I got a congratulations email from the lady who interviewed me, as well as the offer letter on my old phone. I freaked out afterwards bc I was like, ain't no way??? She said she'd send me somethin' on WEDNESDAY?? It's SUNDAY. I even told my ma and she was excited, then I was like-- I really manifested this??? After an entire year of being unemployed despite havin' my degree, and forcin' myself to work at Amazon and FedEx just to have a lil' change to call my own... I finally scored the job I WANT.

The best advice I could give you tbh is that ya should make robotic affirmin', the list method, and the ten minute method yer best friend. I did not have a good outlook on employment until I settled down and decided to change my thinkin' and god I was still stressed as fuck even when I affirmin'. I've never been good at talkin' to strangers, especially on the phone or on video call, but I affirmed right up until the interview started that the job would be mine no matter what and I was completely calm. Now, I am a step closer to my dream job. (I'm a substitute teacher currently workin' towards my credentials to be a full-time teacher in case ya were wonderin', the company I work for also provides grants to pay for the schooling needed to get credentialed which is such a big fuckin' bonus)

and yes, they definitely all are amazin' people, I never expected to have such a positive lil' community of followers but I am grateful to them, for sure.

bUt, okay, lemme stop ramblin' here's what I wantcha to do anonnie— I want ya to make yerself a list, title it whatever ya want to call the list, and fill that list with affirmations, askformations, statements, new beliefs, whatever ya want. could include anything ya want, details about the job ya want, how much money ya wanna make, how ya want the bosses to treat ya, what kinda work environment ya want, whatever, and then I want ya to include some self-concept affirmations, as well as some affirmations about the void (whatever feels natural for you), ah and some manifestation affirmations too. make it however long or short ya want, doesn't matter. once ya have that, read it over as many times as ya want and then throughout the day, whenever ya can, I want ya to robotically affirm that you've got everything on [name of yer list], say this whenever ya can, and especially when ya start thinkin' negative about whatever you desire or whenever ya feel like you're about spiral. affirm this through everything and anything, affirm if ya can't help but cry, affirm when yer angry, affirm when yer happy, just keep affirmin.'

as long as ya keep this up and correct yer thoughts, you'll have guaranteed movement in yer life, that's the law. even in false hope, whatever is repeated shall harden into fact.

[plasteredwalls]

Rant incoming

WHY IS TECHNOLOGY SUPPORT SO GODDAMM DIFFICULT I SWEAR TO GOD.

So. I want to play minecraft online. I don't really use my Microsoft account often but I figure it should be fine. I get signed up for PS Plus, I pay my £6.99, and now I just have to link my Microsoft.

I do the link. I submit the code, then the email, then the password...then the code again then the email then the password and so on so forth until the link expires.

I make a new Microsoft account, as suggested, and it actually seems to be getting somewhere. Until the game is like "Oh you have to sign into the account linked with your game. Yknow, Jyan, which we can remember the name of but not your freaking details".

So I try that. Get in a loop again because it's that outlook email. I sign into Gmail outlook, everything looks fine. I have a string of very recent emails from Amazon about a refund so I know my email *works* at least.

But log in still won't work. So I look on the Microsoft question thing for answers and someone has had the loop issue. There's a link about account recovery. I'm desperate, I mean what the hell nothing else is working, so I use that link. They ask for an alternative email to send me a confirmation where they explain that I did not give them enough details and, as a really really kind courtesy (BECAUSE THATS HOW THEY PHRASED THIS, LIKE IT WAS A COURTESY) they've locked me out of my account :). Yay :). Because they take security reallllly seriously. Except they haven't Because I can still access my emails on the Gmail app but still can't do anything else.

By the way, did you know once you link a Microsoft account to a ps4 account you can NEVER UNLINK AND RELINK A NEW ONE?! Why. What do you GAIN Microsoft. Oh also because ps plus is a paid service they really hate you using it on other accounts of the same ps4 device or really any online features on any account other than the main one. Because what.

So clearly my issue is too complicated for online articles. I've tried and got no where, in any case worse. Let's try reddit - SYKE ALL THE BOTS RUINED REDDIT AND I CANT ACCESS ANY TECH SUPPORT GROUPS TO ASK QUESTIONS MYSELF UNLESS I GET SO MUCH KARMA. GREAT.

So. Microsoft tech support. Please be a good - OH OF COURSE ITS NOT

To summarise this amazinggggg service

1 - CAN'T FIND A RELIABLE NUMBER BECAUSE OF THE SCAMS

1.5 - Google AI summarise RECOMMENDED ME A SCAM NUMBER AS THE OFFICIAL ONE

2 - I can't find anywhere where I can submit a text complaint.

3 - All the search bars just take me to pre written articles as if I haven't read enougj

4 - THEY THEN OFFER ME A PAIDDDDD SERVICE TO "GET FIRST IN LINE FOR GPT TO SOLVE MY ISSUE"

What. The actual. Fuck.

I just want to talk to a human who knows something PLEASE. No none of the articles have helped. No I don't want AI to tell me, it has PROVEN its USELESSNESS. I just wanna talk yo a freaking human, preferably over the phone, who can tell me what to do or initiate some stiff themself because clearly the design has self imploded and IM JUST SO FREAKING FRUSTRATED IM SAT HERE WITH £7 OF A WORTHLESS SUBSCRIPTION AND NO RELIABLE TECH SUPPORT TO FIX IT ALL BECAUSE EMAIL BROKE BUT NOT REALLY.

And that doesn't even BEGIN to worry about whether I'm gonna be able to get my money back on this completely useless service.

So I'm turning to Tumblr. What's tumblrs tech support like??? I don't know, maybe there's a genius out there SOMEWHERE. Because clearly I can't use reddit, thanks barrier to entry :/ and I can't just ring up a human who can actually listen to my words with the nuances that don't fit into the fucking booklet.

If anyone knows anything that could help, please leave your wisdom here I'm frustrated and desperate and don't wanna lose £7 on something I can't even use.

[disease-danger-darkness-silence]

Amazon Affiliate Listicle, but with my ADHD and propensity for swearing

So I'mma do a listicle of Amazon affiliate links just like every other place is doing for Prime Days.

I'm just gonna tell you ahead of time that I'm doing it for money and the sense of incredulity I feel about... Amazon as a whole.

🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

A Backbone, probably the most ridiculous gaming accessory I've ever seen. Yes, I'd like to use my phone as a controller for $35 more than a normal PS5 controller costs and have almost no other functionality!

I am ALL ABOUT BIDET ATTACHMENTS, okay, but this brand is so fucking overpriced. I'm not paying $77 to launch high-powdered water up my chocolate starfish, and I'm definitely not paying the normal $110. I WILL say that I've used this brand and it was good, but... Dudes. It's a stream of water to make wiping your ass easier. How much is that actually worth? This is a much better price for the exact same functions.

When I saw this set of movies, I didn't see that it was James Bond. Daniel Craig is wearing like a sweater, but I also didn't realize it was Daniel Craig. All I saw was CRAIG. This is, for some reason, absolutely fucking hilarious to me.

Instant Pot for $65, need I say more?

Okay I'm not even joking, this is just a pretty fucking decent price ($84) for a 1.5 TB microSD card.

If you have a 3D resin printer, today is the day to stock up: AnyCubic has some really good resin deals going on! I personally love the plant-based resin, but I've heard amazing things about their water-washable stuff. I wanna try the ultra-tough resin, though. (Note: this is UV resin so you don't have to actually use it in a 3D printer. You can use it in a mold too.)

Let's spend $50 to make a single cup of coffee at a time when I can make better coffee using a disposable tea bag. 🙄 The hatred I have for single-use coffee makers knows no bounds.

What you do is take about two regular spoons full of coffee grounds (another half a spoon if you like it harsh, half a spoon less if you like it light), put them in the tea bag. Put any other spices and flavorings you like in the bag too. Close it, and tie it closed really well (I wrap the strings around the top of the bag and tie them again when I've tied it.) steep for 5 minutes in a mug full of hot water (doesn't matter how it got hot), and then add milk or creamer depending on your preference. It will have less of an acidic bite and a better flavor profile.

I'm super into the idea of bleaching my tooth enamel until it rots away and my teeth are super white but extremely sensitive! Give it to me, Crest! Yeah Daddy!

If you DO want the tooth-brightening shit, you'll probably want to invest in a few tubes of Sensodyne. Trust me.

Oh, you eat Tide pods? Cool, cool, if you Wan a be like 2021 about it. I'm a dishwasher pod kid. Snack time.

OK no sarcasm, this shit will clean your washing machine so fuckin good. My daughter gave me some and suddenly none of us smell like Satan's asshole anymore. Fucking amazing.

Okay look, if you wanna get special pimple patches, go ahead, they're on sale today and they DO work, but they're just hydrocolloidal bandages. I get the regular ones bc I can cut them to shape.

Okay fullstop, I love the power mops Swiffer makes and this is a GREAT deal. Anyone wanna buy me a new mop? 😂

Oh shit, they have Naked mini-palettes for 40% off. That's $21 omg why am I a poor with expensive makeup taste??? WHY? (They also have the Stila liquid eyeliner on sale somewhere.)

Yes, sir? I'd like the biggest, widest computer monitor to ever exist. I'm a gamer, you see. A thousand dollars today, you say? What a deal! I'm a gamer! (Look, I have a gaming computer and a pretty big monitor but there's a fkn limit, Samsung. There's a line and you've crossed it.)

I almost didn't click on the "pet products" tab because I miss Ziva SO MUCH. But I do love pampering my pets. In that vein, WHO WANTS TO BUY A SHOCK COLLAR?

If you've ever needed 900 poop-scooping mini garbage bags... Today is your day. Time to shine.

Aw fuck, I found a pretty damn good deal on a cat tree.

If you don't have a 3D printer, you have to buy Settlers of Catan like a peon and it's on sale today.

I'm actually disappointed in myself how much I want this.

TICKET TO RIDE FOR UNDER $40.

If you wanna train your pet to talk these things are on sale.

For the low, low price of $98, you too can let your child kill themselves by improperly using a Zipline kit.

EXPLODING KITTENS FOR $10 AND I MEAN THE GAME NOT ACTUAL KITTENS BUT I GUESS HE HAS A SHOW NAMED THAT TOO?

As a general rule Raven and I don't buy Nerf products because they're owned by Hasbro and we're boycotting them because of the whole Pinkertons thing. Plus, in the world of foam dart guns they're actually doing the worst when it comes to innovation and performance. But! We will get them on clearance or secondhand. I consider Prime Day to be clearance, so have this multipack for a kid's party that I wish I'd had for Raven's birthday party last month.

Also, this translucent blaster.

I love this style of shorts (although I got the viral tiktok ones) but omg this one has POCKETS.

Today I discovered that there is a brand called THE GYM PEOPLE and they make really boring clothes.

Hey plus-sized ladies! Want yet another ugly beige bra? Look no further!

I have one of these mandolin slicers. Highly recommend.

Get your kids used to corporate surveillance with an Amazon Echo made just for them!

THESE ARE THE ONLY PENS I USE.

Amazon putting these under "off to college" is absolutely fucking hilarious to me.

I'm actually really bummed I don't have the money to get this Samsung Galaxy Tab.

Amazon knows what's up when it comes to kids: a five-pack of identical pants. I think it's for uniforms but like. Let's be real, kids just go through clothes like that.

Every time I see a Skullcandy product, I remember when I was at a Skullcandy booth at the Warped Tour and I asked the booth babe how they compared to Sennheiser or even Audio-Technica. She looked at me, and in a snooty voice, said, "I've never even heard of Sennheiser before."

[fuckkbrunch]

I'm going to start this by saying a big fuck you to Amazon. I tried to find hatch chilis everywhere. I even found a few websites that claimed to ship them to Canada, but they'd shut down a few years ago.

The only place I could find them was Amazon, and I refuse to give that bald, soulless fuck any of my money. So.

I did some googling, and found that Anaheim peppers are grown from the same seed as hatch chilis, but they're grown in different environments. They have Anaheim peppers at my local grocery store, so that's good enough for me.

Downside being that I could only buy them fresh, where the hatch chilis are able to be purchased pre roasted.

Happy to finally get to this one. I've been looking forward to it since the beginning of all this. I love me some braised beef.

No beans, no rice. This one is New Mexico style, so it's all about the meat and chilis. Pretty straightforward ingredient list.

After I bought these Anaheim peppers (top row), I went to the better grocery store for poblanos (bottom row) and saw that they also carried Anaheims, for half the price. Fuck sake. Never seen them there before. Of course.

Broiler time baby. If you pop these into a paper bag while they're still hot, the skin comes off so easily. The flesh was so soft it was really annoying to remove the seeds. I don't mind heat in my chili - if its not hot it's not chili - but I hate when there's fifty million seeds floating around.

Beef cubes in seasoned flour, seared on all sides, set aside. Onion and garlic in the pot, soften and add your spices, harissa (in place of tomato paste, he suggests this in the recipe header) and beer. The whole cooking method is the same as any stew, or chili. Most braised beef recipes.

Found this Mexican oregano in a fancy grocery store early in the year, which Tony says you should use if you can get it. I'd never seen "whole" oregano before, these are so spiky. I chopped them up a bit, but I still found a little twig when I was eating.

Peppers all skinned, mostly seeded, and roughly chopped. Chuck the rest of the ingredients in the pot (seared beef, peppers and broth) and simmer, covered, for an hour and a half, or so he says.

I tasted it at the 90 minute mark and it was pretty watery still. It also had a ton of fat on the surface, which I skimmed off. Tony makes no mention of this, but it was 100% necessary. I added salt, let it simmer without a lid for another 45 minutes to an hour, and skimmed it again. Then it was looking like chili should.

The beef I used for this had been in my freezer for more than a few months, but this was still so good. Serve with sliced jalapeno, sour cream and toasted corn tortillas. I used tortilla chips, even though I have corn tortillas in my freezer...

I wish I made a double batch.

| New Mexico-Style Beef Chili |

Taste is a 4 out of 5. Thick with a good heat level. Very happy with how it turned out.

Difficulty is a 3 out of 5. I'll say a 2 if you don't have to broil your own peppers.

Time was about 3 hours, which includes my extra hour of cook time.

Now I wanna try this with other types of peppers. Going to keep my eye out for when beef goes on sale...

[eternallyanxiousandstressed]

Okay, so the tea on the tax situation

So it's well known that in America, being married you get benefits come tax season when you file jointly. It's great, especially if you have a kid! You usually get a much bigger refund, but you have to file jointly to get those benefits... which is what Ratboy and I agreed to do

Then he turns around and tells me to file separately because it'll give a bigger refund? (False). But I can't argue because I'd have to have his W-2s to file jointly for us and he'd have to send pictures of them to me for that so...

Anyways he has the audacity to try and claim Luke (which heavily increases your refund by the way). One, I fucking BIRTHED the kid that year and for awhile we were fully reliant on my income??? you know, the income from my maternity leave??? Because he didn't have a job AND WASN'T APPLYING. Anyways, so I get a new job after my maternity leave is over because fuck Amazon. I was working full time making $18.50/hr (i think). He worked maybe 20 hours a week minimum wage ($16.50 ish). I ended up losing that job because of an at the time undiagnosed chronic illness. I instantly applied for jobs and got an interview. I started the next month. The whole process took me a month, and then I was at full time again! I ended up leaving that job at the end of September (Ratboy left his job too) because we were planning to move states but that didn't work out and also I'm applying for disability. In all of that time I was working I had to put all my money towards keeping a roof over our head and I was constantly buying stuff for Luke if I had to. But yeah... Luke was Ratboy's dependent...

Turns out I need his W-2s anyways because filing separately in the state we're in means we have to take stupid extra steps and it's bullshit. So once I explain this to him, he reveals he hasn't filed his yet and he needs to look at it because it was "being weird).

Motherfucker I swear, this asshole texts me today in response to me reminding him I need my W-2s saying not to worry about it because he's gonna file jointly because it'll give more. But this asshole said he was gonna be getting fucking $6000 filing separately. Wanna know about what I was gonna get? $450

So he was trying to majorly screw me over. Like fucking majorly. And now he's going to do our joint taxes and I swear to god if he tries to not give me my share of the money for WHATEVER reason I will be finding a way to kick his ass

Because with my portion of the refund? I'd probably have enough to sustain myself until I got the info on if my disability was approved or not. So... I could divorce him. And oh boy do I want to divorce him. The shitty thing is, we don't have room for Luke here at my dad's. If we did? Well, my dad was majorly fucked over when him and my mother got divorced... so he knows exactly what there is to fuck someone else over.

Maybe I'll wait to divorce Ratboy until I have room for Luke...

[raideo]

Issey drama anon here, please tell us about Romance Doll because I have not heard anything about it

also, have you heard of Quartet? I've seen like 50 gifsets from it and it seems legit funny as hell

UMMM WELL- I'll put my thoughts on Romance Doll under a break at the end because the movie is pretty nsfw and weird and yeah...

Quartet is on my list! I'm definitely going to watch it at some point, but I also really wanna watch Miracles! Honestly that one has been the most interesting to me from the beginning but my adhd is just causing me to watch whatever's convenient first, not the ONE IVE REALLY WANTED TO WATCH THIS WHOLE TIME. I still have to finish Koisenu Futari too... I stopped that one cuz I was watching it with someone and we had a long period of time where we couldn't watch it. And then also it's just VERY HEAVY as a person who happens to be demi who has gone through periods of feeling like I could be aroace in the past. It's so realistic and deals with the painful things as well as the funny things and I am scared to finish it bc I KNOW THERES MORE HEAVY SHIT TO COME but it's an amazing show AND I DO WANT TO FINISH THAT ONE TOO.

And on a completely polar opposite note: ROMANCE DOLL, LMAO

Ok so, this movie is very much one of those WEIRDLY REALISTIC stories where all the characters are so real and flawed and HUGE MISTAKES ARE MADE by characters and it's just such a wild ride. You probably haven't heard about it because its FUCKING WACK.

Without giving too much away in case you wanna watch it (netflix dropped it last monday, which is actually why I ended up watching it over the weekend at all, but it's still available to rent on amazon 🙄) Issey plays Tetsuo, an unemployed art college grad who is desperate for a job. His friend gave him a tip about this sketchy job opening but told him literally nothing else about it. He shows up and this old woman greets him and shows him around and he's a bit shocked to find out it's a shop that makes SILICONE SEX DOLLS. The woman is like "your friend didn't tell you that???" And Tetsuo was like "he literally just said there was a job here-" and she laughs and says "Some friend he is then!" Honestly I loved the old lady she's great, I wish I could remember her name I'm too lazy to go look it up rn.

Anyway so yeah, he takes the job even though the interview was super awkward and there's this gross pervy old guy who works there and he doesn't really care about the subject matter he just needs money (mood)

One thing and another happens (and a lot of me wanting to slap the old man into next tuesday, seriously he's the worst) and a little bit later Tetsuo meets the love of his life through some bullshit connection to his job, and they end up getting married some time after, but she doesn't know what he does for a living and ITS ALL VERY HARD TO EXPLAIN WHY HE KEEPS THAT FROM HER without spoiling things but just- the movie is wack, I really didn't like it in the beginning but it pulls a complete 180 and ends up being this weirdly emotional and AT TIMES, a holesome wholesome slice of life movie??

Don't get me wrong it doesn't sugarcoat things like objectification of women and there's some degree of realistic portrayal of that bc of the whole Tetsuo working at a sex doll shop thing, it is very true to life- how men can be gross even if they aren't going so far as assaulting anyone. It doesn't excuse it either it just presents it as it is, which is good I think. But then there are OTHER moments where the movie is very sex positive- so its a wild fucking trip tbh. Definitely don't watch it if you have sensitivities to the things I mentioned above bc bro omg the first half almost had me like "yeah I can't watch this" a couple times jfc.

BASICALLY by the end of the movie the message is that communication and being open with people you love (and not getting bogged down with anxiety and guilt) is important, because on top of not being fair to the people who are important to you, hiding things from them can eat you up inside and make you act irrationally and hurt them even more whether you realize it or not. And also, you never know how someone will feel about the things you don't want to tell them. Something that could be huge to you could be no big deal to another.

Its just a very interesting movie. I don't know if I'd recommend it, theres some NUCLEAR SECOND HAND EMBARRASSMENT CRINGE MOMENTS like oh my god i wanted to die- and like I said above, there's lots of intense subject matter and some not so pretty moments that a lot of people may want to avoid. Id for sure check one of those sites that gives content warnings before watching bc hoo boy...

But all that aside, once again Issey is an incredible actor and his range is apparent in this movie. I saw some like- borderline SLAPSTICK physical comedy moments that had me so surprised bc he did them so well but its so new and different from anything else ive watched him star in. Dude is just unstoppable tbh. He HAS 👏 THE 👏 RANGE!! 👏

Also you get to see him naked a lot. So there's that!

[smol-grey-tea]

Hi! Sorry if this is a bit weird but I recently finished Nameless and have been trying to find more content of it because I love it so much, and came across your Tumblr. I've been reading your posts on the game and I especially like your one post talking about Yuri because you put into words what I couldn't. Thank you! I also really love that you're transcribing Nameless into a book! I was wondering if you want some help with that because I cannot get over this game and am planning to go through it all over again

Hi (●’◡’●)ﾉ!!!! This isn't weird at all, it is very very appreciated!!! 😁😁😁😁 I'm always glad to see anyone who loves Nameless, new or old :3 if you want more content of it, I do recommend the dlcs!! ^^ I'm very glad you love my own Nameless content!!! 😊😊 it means a lot to me :)

Yes, Yuri is such a fascinating character!! I have more to write about him and others, there really should be more Nameless essay content imo!! I am doing the Lord's work here!! 😂

Transcribing it has been such a passion for me recently, I like that it gives me a sense of purpose, so I'm very glad people like the idea of it!!! But some of it is difficult yes, and I would appreciate some help 🤔ᴴᴹ

I've already completed Eri, Lance and Yeonho's books, but before I can do anything else with them, they'll all need to be proofread. I've attempted to proofread Eri's before but rereading shit that I've already written, especially for the purpose of looking for mistakes, is actually so. Fucking. Boring. My mom's tried to but she never has the time either, so she can't..

I'm rly not sure how to get someone to proofread it but I think it'd cost a lot of money?? 😦😬 ouch.. So if there's any way you could help with that, that'd be very much appreciated!

After they're proofread ik I want them to have pretty covers :) my dad told me to make the covers myself but, (￣ヘ￣）ᵁᴹᴹ no 😂😂 I think I want them properly done, but preferably by someone who's already a fan of Nameless. I have a couple different people in mind for commissioning the covers but if you'd like to make them, please don't be shy!! We can definitely talk more in depth about stuff in dms if you'd like!! :) ^^

After they've all been proofread and such, I can I think get them self published on Amazon? It should be for sale both digital and physical but I would highly prefer for people to buy it physically since that's the whole point I'm making it

The more time passes, the more anti-digital I am.. It's about media preservation. Streaming services can pull your favourite shows or movies at the drop of a hat, just because they don't bring in enough profit, not to mention the strikes lately. If buying isn't really owning, then piracy isn't stealing. I'm growing to appreciate physical media so so so much more.

I love Nameless so so much, it is my biggest passion in life, that's no exaggeration. It's highly unlikely, but if it was ever unavailable to play, for whatever reason, I don't know what I would do.. I don't care if Cheritz throws copyright issues my way, I am determined to commit this game to a physical copy. To actually touch the pages and display them in my room and keep them forever.

So that's why I'm doing it. I do still of course plan on releasing it digitally, and will always keep the 1st chapters of each book public, but releasing it as physical copies is the reason why I'm doing it in the first place, so I'd really love if people would enjoy them physically :)

In the meantime! On the subject of Nameless merch, I do recommend (￣ヘ￣）ᵁᴹᴹ @/nocturnal-lullabies because they've made their own Nameless merch before as well! I'm not sure if their old stuff is still available but they've said recently that they wanna start doin merch again, so keep an eye out for any new posts of theirs! :)

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 1 Transcript: The Earth is a Year of the Rat

[Garageband Good Omens theme song plays]

C: Hello! My name is Crystal.

G: And my name is Grey.

C: And this is Rubbish and Probably a Podcast, a Good Omens commentary podcast, where I, someone who has seen the show too many times…

G: And I, someone who only knows this show through Crystal, discuss every episode of Good Omens.

C: For today's episode, we are discussing Season 1, Episode 1: “In the Beginning.” [G cheers] What a good time!

G: It is a very good episode of a TV show. 

C: Yeah, I agree. I'm so glad you like it because I strong-armed you into doing this podcast. [G laughs]

G: You sure did. Well, I think I was mostly surprised in that- I am not an avid TV show watcher, and most of the TV shows that I do watch and like tend to have a very episodic nature, you know, like “there's a plot for one episode and it finishes up in that episode” kind of deal. So this one felt very cinematic in that it felt like a movie cutup, I guess. I don't know what the second episode is gonna be like. But it's very plot-heavy and all that crap, you know? It's pretty fun. It's new. And also it's very beautifully made. Like, it looks really good. [laughs]

C: Yeah. I mean, I think the CGI suffers in later episodes. 

G: They have a budget. 

C: But yeah, they definitely do have that Amazon money.

G: Yeah, they have that fucking Amazon Prime budget, baby. [C laughs] It's pretty good. Okay. So for the synopsis of the episode, we'll be taking the synopses from the Fandom Wiki. “This episode is about two celestial beings, the angel Aziraphale and the demon…” Crawly? [both laugh] It's Crawly, right? They pronounce it like that?

C: It’s Crawly at first, but it's Crowley now.

G: Okay. Crawly.

C: Crowley.

G: Like creepy-crawly? Crowley.

C: His name- in the Garden, his name is Crawly, and then he transgenderly changes it to Crowley later. So if you don't wanna deadname him, you should call him Crowley. [G laughs]

G: Crowley. God. Okay. “-have gone native and worry when their superiors tell them to prepare the Antichrist for Armageddon. They resolve to secretly join forces to make sure the Antichrist is neither good nor evil... unaware that there was an unwitting switch made and the Antichrist isn't who they think.” This is a really fun episode!

C: It is. I really like how much it clearly comes from a book. Like, lot of the God narration bits are just lifted wholesale from the book.

G: Yeah!

C: And I feel like it brings the structure together very well in a way that we don't get in Season 2.

G: I knew that it was from a book, but I would say that it does obviously come from a specific narration style, or whatever. But, I mean, I haven't read the book, so I don't know how true this is- it does feel a little bit like the visuals do add a lot to the story.

C: Yeah. Yeah. I really appreciated the cards visual. I feel like some people will think, “That's too much, I’m not that stupid.” But the thing is, I am that stupid. [G laughs] And I appreciate knowing how the mix-up happened.

G: I also quite like how funny it is.

C: Yeah.

G: It's so funny! It's a very funny episode in what I assume is a comedic show.

C: Yeah, and a funny book.

G: I mean, the thing about a lot of media that takes from Bible stuff is they kind of go both ways. You know, some of them can be “taking the piss out of the Bible” kind of thing, and the other side is kind of like, “take it super seriously it's unreal.”

C: Yeah.

G: I feel like this one is like, it's funny, it strikes the balance. And I'm not gonna be like, “But it respects the Bible!” like, I really do not give a shit. [C laughs] But it has a sense of being tethered to the concepts that appeal to me a lot. 

C: Mm.

-

G: So, the intro of the show is very narrative-focused; I mean, the narration is the focus of the entire bit, and they’re talking mostly about how the world and the universe is formed. 

C: Basically we have these sort of very fun graphics that are like Bill Nye mixed with Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, as a voice narrates, and it talks about a few theories regarding the creation of the universe, and then says that the Earth was actually created about 6,000 years ago. 4004 BC, at 9:13 AM. The voice then goes like, “This proves that God does not play dice with the universe. I play an ineffable game of my own devising.” Which immediately is- I remember this being a fun moment when I first watched the show, like, what a cheeky little reveal that the narrator is God. And then it says that the Earth is a Libra.

G: I know, I thought that was funny as hell!

C: It's quite funny. It has also incited- there's a lot of people who like to argue about what zodiac signs Crowley and Aziraphale have, and I think there's a school of thought that's like, "They have to be Libras, because that's when the Earth was created."

G: The Earth was created, yeah.

C: Yeah, which I understand. But also, they existed before the Earth was created. And I mean, I don't have an opinion on zodiac personalities, but like, for everyone out there, yeah. Glad that you have a line to back you up.

G: [laughs] The thing about me is, I do not give a single shit about Scorpio or Libra or whatever, but I care so so deeply about what year in the Chinese calendar you were born. 

C: Oh, yeah! Wait fuck, what's 4004 BC, what animal is that? [G laughs] 

G: Let’s look it up, baby.

C: Okay, okay. Let's do- okay. If we add- [sped up audio of C calculating] God, I don't know math anymore. This is disgusting.

G: It’s because you already did well in your GRE. 

C: It's true. I did well in my GRE and then I decided that I was gonna forget everything in the entire world. Okay, so 2020 is 4 mod 12- [sped up audio of C calculating] -was the Year of the Rat. 

G: Oh my god!

C: The earth is a fucking rat. 

G: I love it. 

C: Wait, that works so well! It's the first one! Like, the rat won the race! [G laughs]

G: That’s wonderful. 

C: It literally is the first one! Fuck yeah, okay. Thanks, Neil Gaiman. That's something I won't say often.

G: Thank you Neil. [laughs]

C: You know what, maybe that was Terry Pratchett. Thanks, Terry Pratchett. 

G: I'm sure that the Chinese zodiac was very deeply entrenched-

C: -was heavily consulted, yes- [laughs]

G: -into their writing.

C: - when they decided this. Yeah. My grandpa's a rat. Who are the rats in your life?

G: My parents are. [laughs]

C: Oh my god, both of them? What a win! 

G: Yes, they were in the beginning.

After the whole Libra bit, which I thought was the most amusing thing in the world, and has made me decide immediately that this is going to be a fun show-

C: Hell yeah. 

G: -they introduce Adam and Eve. I mean, not introduce, they show them, and they're like, out there in the world, in the garden of Eden. And we finally see Crowley as a snake slithering on that garden.

C: Yes, fun fact about his snake form is that he is a red-bellied black snake, which is a species that originates from Australia. Society if Crowley had an Australian accent. 

G: [in an Australian accent] Oi there, mate. [laughs]

C: Exactly, exactly, just like Robert Chase. 

G: They're just like Robert Chase!

C: And a thing about the red-bellied black snake is that they're not aggressive, they generally stay away from humans, and that even though they are venomous, there've been no recorded deaths from someone being bitten by one of them. And I feel like that's so Crowley, because as we learn later, he doesn't like tempting directly, he tries to do things that spread out small amounts of harm over a bunch of different people. So like, you're right, no deaths have been recorded from his bite. Saur fucking true. This was probably just chosen because of the color scheme, which is a fun color scheme. But you know, fun that the snake personality fits.

G: Also, can I say that, for some reason I always assumed- because you told me in the past that Crowley always wears sunglasses to hide the snake eyes, or whatever-

C: Did you think that they were red? 'Cause of Supernatural?

G: -and I always assumed they were red, yes! Are they ever red?

C: No.

G: Is that just a Supernatural thing that I just applied to this show?

C: That's just a Supernatural thing. Fucking Cr-ow-ley Supernatural has red eyes, but he's a disgusting thing that is not fit to touch my boy. [laughs]

G: Okay, yeah, so Crowley has-

C: He's probably fine, I haven’t even met him on the show yet. 

G: I love the look of Crowley, and I love the way it changes through the years.

C: Yes! Yes, he's a very fashionable little guy.

G: Yeah! The hair change when he was a nanny, I thought it was wonderful! I thought it was amazing. And also the way- Aziraphale’s actor is called Michael Sheen. Am I correct? 

C: Yes. Yes.

G: And Crowley is David Tennant. 

C: Wait, have you had a- have you ever encountered David Tennant before? You were not a Doctor Who person.

G: Nope. Soon I will be a Midsummer Night's Dream- no, no, it’s Much Ado. [laughs]

C: No! Much Ado About Nothing! Yeah. Okay, yeah.

I've been badgering Grey to watch the Tennant and Tate Much Ado for a long time and these efforts manifested in rewriting the entire script of the play to suit Supernatural characters-

G: [laughs] Which I did not read at all!

C: -and sending them to him half a scene at a time every day for a month, and he didn't read any of it. But you know what, I had fun.

G: Yes, that's what's important. I think the way they both act is- especially, I think, David Tennant, because a thing that I know about this show as well is that you really, really, really like Crowley.

C: Yeah. [laughs] I want to be him so bad. 

G: And I can see why, because it's like, you know, the fun charismatic guy.

C: Yeah, who's also a giant loser and flop.

G: Yeah! I don't know. Towards the end, when he was like, “Oh, the dog isn't here,” and then, you know, he gets a call from Hell, and he was like, “Oh, no, no, no! The dog is here! Never mind!”

C: Right. "Great, big helly hound."

G: It’s a good bit of characterization. [laughs] Yeah. It's super fun. And he is wonderful!

C: Yeah. 

-

C: So right, we see him tempt Eve, who then passes the apple onto Adam, and right, what he says is, “This apple will give you…” And then it sort of blanks out. What did Bible Snake say to Eve again?

G: I think it's knowledge. Right?

C: Yeah, yeah. That tracks. A few things about the theology or whatever here, I feel like this skips over the most important parts of Genesis where God yells at them and casts them out and curses the snake or whatever the fuck to focus on Crowley and Aziraphale, which I think is fun. 

G: [laughs] Yeah, this is more important.

C: [laughs] Yeah, this is the important part! Specifically, I feel like I often forget how this part of Genesis ends with the line, “After he drove the man out, he placed on the East side of the Garden of Eden cherubim, and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the Tree of Life.” That is not a line that I remember. But I just really like the idea that someone read this and was like, “Okay, there's two nonhuman characters in here. There's the serpent, and there's this unnamed angel with a flaming sword. And we've decided that they're besties, and that these two nonhuman characters, who have sort of created humanity as we know it by doing the apple temptation and then guarding the tree afterwards, that they're gonna stay on Earth for thousands of years and like it there, and also be besties, and in love.” Like, it's so fun!

G: Yeah! To skip over to the conversation that they're having, basically, there's an introduction between them. And Crowley’s-

C: Oh wait, I also want to talk about how Crowley created misogyny. [laughs]

G: Why? Go on. 

C: Okay. The thing about this is that, Crowley invented misogyny? [laughs] Like that’s on him. [both laugh] Like she did that, that was her. In that- I feel like I was not there when various people came up with and spread the version of Genesis that we know now. But my assumption and I think the assumption of scholars in general is people were sexist, so then they wrote Eve being born from Adam-

G: Oh, yeah, of course. 

C: - and taking the apple first. But in this world where all of this happened, misogyny actually happened because this happened, like, it's a different direction. And why did this happen? Cause Crowley fucking created misogyny. [both laugh] God. This is on them soo hard. I wonder if they ever think about that? Probably not.

So right, now we get the first meeting.

G: Yeah. So the first meeting is, they're talking, they introduce themselves to each other, and Crowley says that he doesn't know why- he think that giving the apple is that bad.

C: Yeah, and that God super overreacted.

G: Yeah. And Aziraphale is like, “Well, it must be bad, cause you did it, and you're a demon,” and he's like, “Well. Whatevs,” [laughs] and then we also find out that Aziraphale gave his flaming sword to Adam and Eve, so as to fucking help them out. Which I thought was- it's such a nice introduction to his character that "There is this duty which was thrust upon me, which was to have this sword, this flaming sword," [C laughs] and he just gave it away because it might help these two. I don’t know, I thought it was real sweet.

C: Yeah, it’s a really good moment. 'Cause it's like, you think that he's just a rule stickler or whatever or that he doesn’t think for himself.

G: Yeah. C: But it's like, no, he has very strong compassion, and he acts on that, and then afterwards, he just has to justify it to himself, or hide it in some way, and Crowley is the one who draws it out of him, that like, “Hey, all the shit you were saying earlier about good and evil. So how does that stack up with how you actually feel, huh, bud?”

G: And they have this exchange of like, “Well, what if what I, the angel, did was actually bad? And what you, the demon, did was actually good? Wouldn’t it be so funny if we both got it wrong?” And then it starts raining, and I suppose this is an important scene, because you have talked about it. [C laughs] But Aziraphale lifts his wing so as to cover Crowley’s head as it rains.

C: Yeah, it's the first rainstorm of the new world, and it's- I'm just so stuck on how Crowley edges closer to Aziraphale and leans into him even before he lifts the wing, and I know it's probably just 'cause we don't hear them talking and discussing it beforehand, but I just like the idea that they're already comfortable enough with each other that they're like, “Hey, you'll protect me, right?” And it is important to note that this is not in the book or the original 2015 draft of the show. Like, Neil Gaiman added that in later, because he wanted to either bait or longcon, and [laughs] I support that.

G: I quite like the kind of conflict that they have here. It's not that "you're evil and I'm good." It's that "you are a vessel of evil, and I'm a vessel of good, but we fundamentally as beings are neither of those things." It’s never about them as beings, you know? It's always the things that they do as instructed to them by their respective bosses.

C: Yeah, but they also do still- at least, Aziraphale still does fall back into the prescriptive cause and effect getting them mixed up sort of thing. Like, Crowley is being sarcastic when he's like, “Oh, you're an angel. I don't think you can do the wrong thing.” But Aziraphale feels like, “Oh, thank god. You're right.” [both laugh]

G: Also, something I find completely fascinating is, throughout the- obviously, this is important to them, but there are a lot of times in the episode where it is just a job, you know? It's just work. Like, for example, when they were talking about the thing that they had lunch for in Paris a while back that Crowley has to make up for or whatever; Aziraphale has to make up for, they go, “What was that about?" "I don't know. But they had amazing crepes!” [C laughs] And it's like, oh, that's amazing. They don't even remember what they were doing. It literally is just a job. 

C: They're just like me reading Gomens fic while in the office. 

G: [laughs] Exactly.

C: Yeah. I make a penny, boss makes a dime, that's why I eat crepes on company time, etc. I think this is also where I think- we mentioned the casting a bit earlier, and like, okay, I think they're both great, I do have a small bone to pick, which is that white people weren't invented yet. Why are they white? Just take them away. [G laughs]

G: No, for real though, most people in this episode are white. 

C: They didn't have white people yet. Right, first, if humans were made in the image of God and Adam and Eve are Black, but Francis McDormand, who narrates as God, is not. Like, I know that evolution didn't happen in this world because it's only 6,000 years old. But I do like the fact that white people weren't here until later because of white being considered default in the country that has a monopoly on international culture a lot of time and stuff, so I don't know. I wish they weren't white, 'cause I don't think they had white people yet.

And I guess another thing about this scene is that I feel like it starts establishing the differences between book and show Aziraphale in that, you know, Crowley is like, “Oh, wouldn't it be funny if we did the thing we weren't supposed to do?” And Aziraphale’s laughing a bit, and then he goes like, “No! It wouldn't be funny at all!” [G laughs] And I think show Aziraphale’s is just- he's a bit more nervous and like- I don't wanna say ditzy, but kind of [laughs] than book Aziraphale, who seems a lot more assured of himself, even if he is a giant hypocrite lying to himself all the time. And I don't think it's a bad choice, I have fun seeing Michael Sheen do what he does, but sometimes I do wish that Aziraphale was a little more of a badass.

-

C: We have the opening credits. Which, did you skip those, or did you watch them?

G: I watched it. I suppose I didn't understand it the way you did. So go on.

C: Oh, I mean, there's not that much to say. It's just fun art and then details about things that are gonna happen during the season. We get the theme song. What did you think about the theme song?

G: I mean, I'm familiar with it because this is- I was gonna say "spoiler!" but it's not a spoiler [C laughs], you guys already heard it. It's the intro to our podcast.

C: Yes.

G: Our intro music is a variation of the Gomens intro.

C: Yeah, it's a GarageBand redo/remake of the theme song. 

G: Yeah. 

C: What did you describe as when I first sent it to you from our lovely composer? 

G: It sounds very much like something that would come out of Ace Attorney. [C laughs] I thought it was really fun. I love Ace Attorney music. And I love this tremendously.

C: Yeah, yeah, I think it's a very fun time. And someone on Tumblr recently pointed out that it's a waltz, which I think is fun. Sadly our beautiful, wonderful composer also pointed out to me when she was making it, she was like, “I thought it sounded kinda like the BBC Sherlock theme song. So I looked it up, and it is the same composer." So now it is forever tainted for me because of that. But it's still a very fun time.

G: Maybe it's just the British sound, have you considered that? [both laugh]

C: Yeah, it’s still the same guy, though. We can't forget that. Very sad. Oh well.

So we cut to a graveyard where we meet two other demons. Oh, first of all, we cut to a graveyard. It's 11 years ago, so like, 2008. Or, I guess, 2007, because later we find out that Bush is still president. We meet two other demons, Hastur and Ligur. And Hastur and Ligur both- Like, Hastur has- his animal motif is maggots, and he has completely black eyes, and his hair is messed up and stuff, and Ligur has a chameleon on his head. I think they both have fun character designs. I mean, they're talking to each other a bit about how Crowley is late for a meeting with both of them, and that he's changed his name from Crawly to Crowley, and they think that he's spent too much time up on Earth, blah blah blah, and then-

G: I mean, the way he's introduced, in the scene where it's like-

C: [laughs] We hear a car, we hear Bohemian Rhapsody's “mamma mia mamma mia” part blasting, and Crowley just swerves into the graveyard.

G: I love it!

C: And this is such a cute “where are they now” thing. Like, we just saw him and now he's here being a flash bastard! And such a fun little guy. He comes out. He's swaggering. He is doing the David Tennant slut walk, as the girlies like to call it, I think?

G: [laughs] I love it. 

C: Which I think is a character choice given that Crowley's original form was a snake, or whatever, and, you know, it's much appreciated. And you know, the demons are all like, “hail Satan, hail Satan.” But then Crowley, who is also a demon, just goes, [both] “Hi guys.” [both laugh] 

G: [laughing] It’s so funny!

C: And like, “Sorry I'm late, you know how traffic is on the blah blah blah. And I tried to cut up towards blah,” and it's like, I don't know. It's very, very fun. Immediately establishes he is literally just a guy living on Earth with a few extra powers. They have to recount their deeds of the day. So both Hastur and Ligur have deeds that are very-

G: traditional-

C: - medieval-

G: - deeds, you know. [laughs] Yeah. You can fucking see these kinds of deeds in 1610 Bavaria or whatever. [C laughs] Like, “I tempted a priest.”

C: “He saw hot girl and went awooga.”

G: “There's a politician. And then we made him take a bribe. In a year, we will have him.” And like, it's the same line, “In a year we will have him.” And Crowley is just like, “I fucking destroyed the [both laugh] cell towers around London. So now no one can call each other.” 

C: Yeah. God, so good. There's a missing scene which I think was actually originally filmed wherein- or maybe it's just in the script, but it was supposed to show how he did that, and how he did that was that he got into one of the phone company whatever buildings, and then he commandeered an army of rats to wreck all the equipment. [G laughs] And they probably didn't have the CGI budget for it, but I feel cheated and robbed that I didn't get to see him do that. 

G: And he was able to do it because he may or may not be from the Year of the Rat. This is so true.

C: So true.

G: I love that when he said this, he was kind of expecting applause or amazement-

C: Oh, yeah.

G: - and the guys were just like, “Okay.” [laughs]

C: Right, like, "What's that supposed to do?"

G: Yeah, he was like, “Oh, it's gonna sow the seeds of chaos, and in many many years, we’ll have many many more souls.”

C: And what he likes about it is that everything- everyone being angry at each other and doing bad things as a result is something that they'll think of themselves rather than something that he had to really strong-arm them into.

G: Influence, yeah.

C: Yeah. It's about preserving free will sort of, but also creating an environment where it is difficult to be a good person. And, I mean, yeah, he is bragging a lot. He's like, “Hey, no one in Hell is complaining about my methods. They love me down there.” [G laughs] What a fun fucking guy. Also, I like that- in the book, he's described as a young man. And in the upcoming graphic novel, he's supposed to look 24. But they cast David Tennant, who's like, 50 in this role. So now he has that “aging rockstar loser dad who's going through a midlife crisis” kind of vibe instead, which is very fun paired with his “attempting to be cool” vibes.

G: Yeah. I also like the idea that now that we are in a more modern age, with more modern technology, evil manifests in more modern ways as well. And I don't know, I really love that concept.

C: Right, like, before, you really did have to go up to priests and whisper in their ear. But you know what? We're good now, just post a really bad take on Tumblr, and three people will yell at their partners today. 

G: Anyway, he gets given a little baby in a basket. 

C: We don't know it's a baby yet, but he does get given a menacing basket. He is not happy. 

G: And I love how in the beginning of the scene, he's like, “Oh, you guys just don't get it. They love me down there,” and then like, when it becomes obvious that he is to start Armageddon, and he is not too amused by the idea, and he's like, “Why me?” [C laughs] And they’re like, “They love you down there,” And then it's revealed later that he's been fucking lying to Hell. [both laugh] That’s why they love him so much. They think he started the Spanish Inquisition and World War II. [laughs] Literally it’s just a job, and he’s just fucking lying to his boss. 

C: In the book he doesn’t even lie. He gets sent a medal that's like, “Thank you for starting the Spanish Inquisition” 'cause they assumed he did it [G laughs], and he was like, “What the fuck is that?” And he went over and he saw it, and then he had to get drunk in a gutter for two weeks, 'cause it made him so upset.

G: Noooo!

C: Yeah, he's my favorite little girl. Love him. He goes, “Guys, it’s not really my scene” when he's given the basket, and Hastur says, “It's your scene, your starring role,” which I think is a fun thing to think about when, I don't know, I just like that phrase because I like how both Crowley and Aziraphale’s lives are so much play-acting, which I also think is very queer, but I guess we'll get into that later.

G:  Is this the one where he tries to call Crowley, and it's- when he tries to call Aziraphale, and there's no lines 'cause he destroyed the cell phone towers, or is that later? 

C: [laughs] Yeah, he can’t call him on the phone. That's later.

G: Yeah. But that's real funny. The callback to that I thought was fucking hilarious.

C: Oh yeah, wait, also, something that I’m so sad that they took out is, they ask him to sign a contract-

G: Oh, they do, yeah.

C: Right, and then he just signs it with a sigil using hellfire from his tongue or whatever. But in the book, at first, he takes out a nice fancy waterproof pen, and he signs the name that he goes by, Anthony J. Crowley, and they go, “No, don't do that. Put down your real name,” and then he has to change it to the demonic sigil, or whatever. Like, they took out that trans moment. And I wanted that trans moment. Give me the trans moment back.

G: For real. And then we meet Jon Hamm, who is so important to me. 

C: Oh, well, first Satan calls him in the car.

G: Yeah, but who give a shit, we meet Jon Hamm after! But yeah, Satan calls him in the car.

C: Which establishes that Hell communicates with him through his radio and other things. And in the car it's also when it gets revealed that what’s in the basket is a baby. The whole time when he's in the car, he's yelling, “Shit shit shit shit shit. Why me?” Which I think is- because I'm so used to Supernatural, I was like, “Oh my god, they can swear on this show?” [G laughs] So it was very fun that he didn't have to say “friggin’.” And we also get a God narration moment, where She says, “Crowley was all in favor of Armageddon in general terms. But it was one thing to work to bring it about and quite another for it to actually happen.” Which I think is an interesting insight into his psyche, where we do see him questioning things a lot in the opening scene, but also a lot of the times, he is just vibing and trying not to think too much about his job, and the thing that bothers him more than the Earth ending I feel like is him being directly responsible for it.

G: As you've said earlier, he's not a killer. He doesn't do it directly. He's more of a “I'm going to be a silly, goofy guy, and then if there's stuff that happens because of it, then so it be, so it is.”

C: Yeah.

G: So like, I guess this is kind of out of his league, where he has to directly do things for a concrete goal.

C: Yeah. Yeah. Oh, fun fact about book Crowley is that one of his demonic deeds that he does is he just takes coins and he glues them to the sidewalk, so people bend down to pick them up, and then they can't get them off, and he’s like, “That's my doing evil for the day. I did it.”

G: Love that. Has has the concept of evil of a nine-year-old boy.

C: [laughs] Exactly. 

-

C: Okay, we meet Jon Hamm. [G laughs] You can finally say it. 

G: We meet Jon Hamm, and he's Gabriel! He's the angel Gabriel. 

C: Wait, what do you know Jon Hamm from? I have no clue who this guy is.

G: I just know him fundamentally as a person, you know?

C: You would know him by the- what’s the Song of Achilles line?

G: [laughs] No, exactly. He is my Achilles. Yeah, I just know him.

C: What was he in?

G: Who doesn’t know Jon Hamm?

C: Me! What was he even in besides Good Omens? 

G: I think he was in- well, I knew him before this, but he's definitely in an episode of Black Mirror, I think. 

C: Oh, okay, I haven't seen that.

G: And then, I think Jon Hamm is just one of those guys who like- do you know Brad Pitt from anywhere? Even if you haven't watched a movie or anything with Brad Pitt in it, you just know who Brad Pitt is, you know. 

C: That's true. I've never seen anything with Brad Pitt in it.

C: Yeah, that's fair. I mean, people do act like he’s famous.

G: Yeah. And you know what, fun fact, Crystal knows this, but when I was first being exposed to Good Omens through Crystal means, I looked up Aziraphale and Crowley on YouTube, and what showed up is an interview between David Tennant and Jon Hamm, [laughing] and I thought Jon Hamm was Aziraphale. I love that.

C: How long did you think that Jon Hamm was Aziraphale?

G: I mean, for a second, I was like, “Whoa, is Jon Hamm Aziraphale?” And then I continued scrolling. He's not!

C: Yeah. He is not, thank God. 

G: Yeah. 

C: I’m so glad Michael Sheen’s in this, I haven’t seen him in anything else but like, thank god. 

G: This scene is very, again, telling of how Aziraphale is different from other angels, which, I think we are supposed to presume that angels are more like Gabriel than Aziraphale. But they're in a sushi place, and Aziraphale is talking about how the sushi’s good, and he really likes it, and you can dip it in soy sauce!

C: Yeah, and at this, I saved the Tumblr URL soysauceaziraphale to go with my Supernatural blog URL. I don't think I'm gonna use it, but it's nice to have.

G: It's nice to have, exactly. Anyway, Gabriel doesn't like this. He thinks it's nasty to “soil your temple,” or however he puts it.

C: Yes, sully the temple of my-

G: Your celestial body.

C: -with gross matter, yeah.

G: Yeah. And he relays that the end is near, and things are afoot. You know, I've only heard the word “afoot” used in Sherlock Holmes context. 

C: Yeah, same. 

G: I am beginning to think that maybe British people just say it.

C: Maybe! Though, I mean, Gabriel's American. 

G: [laughs] This is true. 

C: It’s very funny. 

G: You know, when you put them together in a room, I cannot recognize the difference between an American and a British accent. It also is revealed here that Heaven, and I presume Hell, also thinks that Crowley and Aziraphale-

C: Have never met or talked to each other. 

G: - don’t know each other? Yeah, exactly. Which is very fascinating to hear, because I think this knowledge barrier sets a kind of fallibility with the angels and demons, where it's like, they don't know everything, 'cause they don't even know this, and that makes the later happenings with Adam and Warlock a lot more believable. 'Cause, you know, "how did they just not know that the kids were exchanged?" And it's because they're not all-knowing, and they don't see everything. This is a good handicap, in a way, for the angels and the demons where- 'cause I feel like in a lot of media, it's like, "They have all the power!" But here, they are very explicit, "This is the limits of their power. They don't know everything."

C: Yeah. I really like just the way that the angels and demons operate in these opening scenes. Like, in the book, Gabriel doesn't exist, and Heaven never interacts directly with Aziraphale. So it does feel more like a panopticon, “they're probably just always watching, so you'd better watch out” sort of thing. But here, it really is just like, "No, they aren't always watching, but also, they can pop up whenever, so you always do have to be afraid. You always have to have an excuse, or somewhere to hide, but you can also do your own thing." And it is exactly like living in a house with your parents while you're closeted and gay, I think. [laughs]

G: No, for fucking real.

C: Yeah, like, when you don't have a lock on your door, it's like, “Okay, I can be on Tumblr looking at girls kissing, or whatever, when I want. But also I always need to have a homework tab open on another window, and know the laptop keyboard shortcut to get there, and blah blah blah blah." I don't know, I like it. I like it a lot. It's very queer to me. And I also like that with the demons, it was a preset meeting.

G: Yeah.

C: They couldn't do anything about Crowley being late. If he just didn't show up at all, they'd probably track him down. But at least they give you warning. Heaven just popping in whenever feels very much like the NSA's whole like, “well, if you have nothing to hide, then what's wrong with us looking at you whenever we want?” thing.

-

G: We go to the plot. And the plot is there's two women giving birth, and one of them is a normal British couple, and the other is a fucking ambassador.

C: Yeah, played by Nick Offerman. 

G: American ambassador, yeah, or whatever, American diplomat. Oh my god, I love this scene so much! We enter a convent, and there's a bunch of nuns.

C: Yes. A Satanic convent.

G: Yeah! And they call themselves the Chattering Order. And I was like, “The Chattering Order. That's a funny thing to say.” And then later, when they're arguing with a demon, they're talking and talking and talking, and the demon’s like, “Stop talking. You're so annoying,” and they're like, “We’re the Chattering Order. All we do is talk.” [laughs] And I love that so much, I think that this is such a fun concept, that they have evil evil nuns. 

C: And I think in the book they make up a saint who prayed to not have to marry a pagan, so then God or someone- Satan or someone?- gave her powers, so that she could never stop talking, and it annoyed her husband so much that they never had to consummate the marriage, or something. Which feels - from two men - sort of feels like a “Women, am I right?” kind of joke?

G: [laughs] Yeah.

C: But it is still kind of fun to see in motion.

G: We figure out that this is where the baby swap is gonna happen. And it's, you know, it's a whole thing. They're planning it out. A couple of things go wrong. Stuff gets mixed up. And suddenly- well, the Satanic baby is supposed to go to the rich couple, but it ends up on the hands of the other couple. But nobody knows that this went wrong. Everybody just assumes that everybody did the right thing, and nobody double checks with anyone. 

C: Specifically, yeah, where the wrong really happens- well, first, Crowley meets Mr. Young, who's the normal British guy outside, and he directs Crowley to Room 3 for the baby. So that's where the baby gets taken. And then a nun who knows that the baby is with the wrong person comes in, asks the other nun nonverbally, “Okay, like, where's the real baby? So I can take the real Antichrist to the American couple?”

G: The other room. Yeah. 

C: Yeah, but that nun misunderstands and thinks that the extraneous baby is the one that is to be pointed out. And fun book fact is that in the book, Mr. Young is homophobic and he’s nervous about being in the nunnery because he's like, “I recently watched a movie where the nuns were lesbians, and I'm worried that the nuns here are icky lesbians also.” And then, when he sees the nonverbal communication that ends in a wink, he goes, “Oh, god, they are lesbians.” 

G: [laughs] Jesus Christ. 

C: And I think this is just- you know how I complained for weeks and weeks on Peach about how the book is just obsessed with making gay jokes while also not letting a single character actually be gay? So yeah, there's an example of that.

I don't even know what they were going with. Was it just like a, we want to satirize people having a pink scare moment or whatever by being like, "Everyone thinks everyone is gay for certain behaviors, but it's not"? But if you do it in a way that's like, “You're being silly, 'cause there's no gay people anywhere anyway,” [laughs] like, shut up?

G: Yeah.

C: Shut the fuck up! Anyway. So yeah, that's that scene. And I don't know, there's some fun moments where the God narrator is trying to explain how the swap happened through playing cards. And then at some point one of the nuns runs into Room 2, and it turns out that the visual of the cards being shuffled that we saw was actually just two nuns chilling and playing cards by themselves in that room. Like, I don't know, some fun visual gags. And it ends with the nuns wheeling out the third baby, the Dowling's biological baby while menacing music plays, and there's a narration about how, “Oh, if you want, you can believe that he got adopted by a perfectly nice family, and he probably wins awards for his tropical fish. But, you know.” But in the book, actually, that does happen, and this third baby grows up to be named Greasy Johnson, and he is one of Adam's rivals in the village, like, he has a rival gang to the Them. But this does not manifest in the show, which is sad, 'cause that was fun. Oh, also, the nuns are trying to suggest names to both of the parents.

G: [laughs] Yeah!

C: 'Cause they’re like, “We want a good Antichrist name,” and both of them are like, “Hey, how about Damian?” [both laugh] And, god, okay, Harriet Dowling- I know this happened because- okay, the thing with Harriet Dowling and the American ambassador is that he's not there for the birth because he's with the President, he's with President Bush right now, and he's just watching everything on video camera and being a neglectful husband or whatever. So she gets the baby. And she's like, “Well, we were gonna name him Thaddeus after my husband, and also his dad, and his dad before that. But like, oh, you want me to name him Warlock? Yeah, sure, let's do that.” [both laugh] I feel like, this is- who the fuck would willingly name their kid Warlock? But I think it's because she's mad at her husband. And you know what, slay. That kid got the coolest name out of anyone.

G: That kid grew up, and everybody he interacted with thought he was transgender. [both laugh]

C: God, for fucking real. Good for him.

G: Yeah. Good for him.

C: And meanwhile, Mr. Young gets convinced to name the Antichrist Adam.

G: Adam, which is a good, cool name. I like the name Adam. Is Damian supposed to be because it sounds like “demon”?

C: Yeah, I think that is maybe the origin of the name. Let me look up “Damian name origin.” [typing] Okay, yeah it sounds like "demon," but apparently it means “to subdue.” So like, that makes sense for a future ruler of a broken world, or whatever.

G: Yeah. Anyway, Crowley and Aziraphale meet. They meet in St James’s Park, and there's this-

C: Well, first we see Aziraphale in his book shop, which is important to me.

G: Okay, I supposed this is important because you mentioned it a lot in your synopsis of Season 2 that I may or may not have listened to fully.

C: I mean, we'll see the bookshop later, but-

G: Yeah, they kiss here.

C: Yeah, they sure do. 

G: [laughs] Quote unquote.

C: One of them kisses the other one, and whether the other one is also kissing the other one is up for debate. I've been swayed to the “they are both kissing each other” side a little bit more recently. But anyway. So yeah, we see a moment of Aziraphale in his bookshop, and he's just being so cute. He has a vinyl of classical music on, and he's sort of moving/singing to the beat as he puts his jacket up on a hook, and we get a good look at his waistcoat, which is tatty and old, that he wears everywhere all the time, which is so autism of him. Love that for him.

G: I like that they, a lot more than Crowley, they make Aziraphale very into like, pleasure, you know? He likes food, he likes very nice champagne, you know, all that stuff. Because I suppose the stereotypical thing to do is to give those traits to the demon, the hedonistic traits to the demon, but he has this appreciation for these things. And I like that. I think that's a very cool trait to have, to give an angel.

C: I agree. I wonder if it's just like, if inspiring lust and sloth and stuff is already part of your job, maybe it's not fun anymore by yourself. [laughs] I mean, I think Crowley has his own ways of indulging, like his silly vintage car, and his clothes that he updates every year or whatever. But yeah, he doesn’t really indulge in the pleasures of the flesh a lot, it's more just like a “how do I look cool and seem cool.”

That's when Crowley finally is able to call Aziraphale, he's unable to do it over the phone line, so he ends up in a phone booth, which I love. And they have a brief conversation where- well, Gabriel specifically told Aziraphale, "Crowley is the one who's starting Armageddon, by the way," and they have a conversation where Aziraphale is like, “Yeah, we do have to talk.” Well, okay. First, he starts by saying, “We're closed,” which is, I mean, a fun Aziraphale trait is that he owns a bookshop, but he hates selling his books, 'cause he likes all of them, so he does everything he can to dissuade customers from buying any.

G: [laughs] That's so real of him.

C: So this is the beginning of that. Yeah. Okay. But yeah, they have a conversation where it's just like, “We should talk. Yeah, this is about Armageddon." "Yeah, I agree, we should talk.” And I like that- Crowley does the job first 'cause he has to, or else he gets tortured or whatever the fuck, right? So he doesn't try to not give the baby away. It's just like, “Okay, I've complied with my part. And now let me do my own thing to make it not work.” And I also like that Aziraphale's never called Crowley and tried to stop him from setting the first piece into motion. Both of them are aware of, like, “Okay, there are limits to what we can do independently. But here we are. Let's talk.”

G: They’re in St James’s Park. And the narrator does this pretty funny bit where it's like, “Yeah, everybody who meets here is meeting in secret in some way, and the ducks have a Pavlovian response to FBI agents now [laughs] when one comes in just to starts quacking for bread." I love that.

C: Also we get a good look at Crowley’s full outfit. And did you notice that his belt is a snake ouroboros thing?

G: No, but that’s pretty cool.

C: Yeah, I can send you the picture given that you obviously care so much about everything. [G laughs]

G: Also, we learn here that this is their usual meeting place. They've done this a lot, and that this is the first mention of the Apocalypse being 11 years in the making.

Oh that’s pretty cool! I would love a belt like that.

C: Yeah, I love the costumes in this show, it’s so fun. I love Crowley's layers, he looks so fucking transgender right now. He has a gray shirt on, and then a black waistcoat on, and then a black blazer on over that, I don't know. That's pretty much identical to the outfit that I wanted to do for prom one year.

G: Okay. Why does Crowley not want the Apocalypse to happen?

C: Well, I mean, what we get from the God narration earlier is just that he doesn't want to do it directly, but I think he seems to have a love for humanity. He's clearly gone native or whatever, right? He talks like someone who complains about the traffic with other people, you know? And we don't actually meet any human friends of his here or really in the book, but I feel like he does have like-

G: I think it really is less about liking humanity for other humans. It's like, he likes to be this way. He likes being here on Earth, you know. And if the Apocalypse is to happen, then all of these things are just gone. And I think it's fascinating, because even though this is not explicitly said about him, the way he approaches Aziraphale, it’s the same concept. He thinks it's gonna work on Aziraphale, 'cause it probably is his thought process as well. To Aziraphale it's like, “Oh, they don't have liquor in heaven. They don't-” And then he also mentions eternity, which I thought was fascinating. They both don't like the idea of everything being endless. 

C: Yeah. I mean, I feel like his approach for Aziraphale is Aziraphale-tailored rather than necessarily something that he thinks himself, that he's just trying on Aziraphale. He is just listing things that Aziraphale likes. But yeah, I do think just liking being on Earth is a primary thing. Also, can we talk a bit about how they're sitting on the bench?

G: [laughs] Okay. 

C: The thing is, they are sitting on the farthest possible edges of the bench from each other in that if you look at where their butts are [laughs], they’re on opposite ends. But because of Crowley's posture, he's leaning all the way-

G: Taking up half the bench, yeah.

C: Yeah, taking up half the bench and leaning all the way towards Aziraphale so that his elbow is just on the brink of brushing Azeraphel's shoulder as he talks to him, and I don't know. It's a fun visual representation of “we have to stay rooted to our sides. But I am going to make my way over to you in the ways that I can.”

G: Aww, that's nice.

C: Yeah, yeah. They make me craaazy. [laughs] And the fact that Aziraphale’s just sitting there with his hands in his lap, like, “I can't do anything.”

-

G: They go to the fucking bookshop, and this is where the conversation happens.

C: They go to the Ritz- well, they're walking to the car and have that conversation. Then they go to the Ritz, and then they go to the bookshop to get drunk, but yeah. I think a fun- they have a conversation, and, you know, Crowley is doing the tempting thing to try to get Aziraphale to help him out. Well, okay, first we get Aziraphale bitchy moment where he's like, “Seriously? You're giving him to an American diplomat? That's so Hollywood blockbuster.” [G laughs]

G: Yeah. 

C: [laughs] Which, I don't know. I just love when people complain about trivial things instead of facing things head on, because they're bitches, because like, same, bro. And he also starts by being like, “Oh, it's gonna be fine, though, cause Heaven’s gonna win, obviously. And it's all gonna be great.” And I don't think he believes any of that, but it is just interesting how he feels the need to play this role.

G: This advocate, yeah.

C: I don't know if he’s in denial, or if he's just like, “Well, this is the company line, and I'm used to just saying it.” But yeah, I don't know. It's just the way that they talk to each other, Aziraphale never, ever says what he means, and Crowley never says directly what he means, but because both of them are aware of how much their hands are tied, they still understand each other most of the time, which I think is very nice. And they're both just playing their roles so well. Crowley is just doing the snake tempting Eve thing to Aziraphale because that's just what they're used to, and that works, eventually. So yeah.

Also, as they head out at the park, there is a traffic warden trying to write a ticket for the Bentley because of how it's parked, and then, as the two of them drive away, the ticket book in his hands explodes. And in the book, it is specified that Aziraphale was the one who did that, in the show they do not say who did it, which makes me sad.

You know, Aziraphale keeps saying no, and Crowley is eventually like, “Okay, let's just have lunch as a social thing, then. I prommy I won’t mention this again.”

G: [laughs] “Yeah, it’s purely social.” Yeah. And then they go to drink, and this is where the Sound of Music-

C: Oh, well, [laughing] they still go to the Ritz first- it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. I just think that the-

G: And then they go to the Ritz, and they just go, “You know what I want to do, I want to get drunk.” And that’s all that happens in the scene. 

C: No, but it's like, the way that they’re sitting! [laughing] Sorry.

G: The way that what?

C: Crowley isn't eating, like, he doesn't even have a plate in front of him. He has a cup of coffee, and what he's doing is he's sitting, and he's leaning forward with his fucking fist in his mouth just watching Aziraphale eat and make “mmm” sounds. Like, [laughs] it's crazy horny, in my opinion. [G laughs] But I mean, clearly you did not get any particular impression from it. I- does this screenshot not arouse any particular feelings in you?

G: Absolutely not. [C laughs] This is how I eat with all of my friends.

C: Okay, well, I think that they want to fuck so bad it's unreal. [G laughs] Okay. But yeah, you're right. Finally, they're in the bookshop and they're getting drunk, fine, we can finally get to that scene.

G: I mean, I don't really have much to say about this. It's just, they're drunk, and they're talking in a drunken way about how, “Oh, you know-”

C: “The gorillas are gonna die, and they're all so innocent.”

G: This is where- I don't know if I mentioned in this recording, or I mentioned it to you off the recording. But I thought the Sound of Music bit was so fucking funny. Basically, Crowley just says, “Oh, maybe in Heaven, you'll climb every mountain over and over again, 'cause you're gonna be there for eternity,” and he goes like, “You know what, I heard God really likes Sound of Music." And Aziraphale looks mortified by this.

C: Right, when he goes, “There's not gonna be any Steven Sondheim in Heaven,” he holds up Into the Woods, which I haven't listened to, but it's always fun to get a taste of Aziraphale’s music taste.

G: I don't know if this is- if it happens here or in the bench, but he also talks about how none of the good composers are in Heaven. [laughs] 

C: Yeah, that’s on the bench. 

G: Like, “The Bachs are in Hell. Mozart's in Hell,” etc. And Aziraphale goes, “Yeah, but they already made their music, so we can just use the music in Heaven.” [both laugh] Which is funny as hell. 

C: Yeah, yeah. The Sound of Music thing I think is so interesting 'cause- okay, I can totally buy God liking Sound of Music. But I don't get why the other angels-

G: Why does Aziraphale not like it?

C: Well, okay, yeah, first, I do feel offended that Aziraphale doesn't like The Sound of Music 'cause that musical was my entire childhood. Like, the movie with Julie Andrews taught me what love was-

G: Exactly.

C: - and I still think that that dancing scene is what invented sexual tension in our modern age. But yeah, okay, first off, what’s wrong with The Sound of Music?

G: I know, exactly!

C: I think the music in it is good! What's wrong with it? It’s fine. It’s a good fucking time. They even yodel. And secondly, why would Heaven like The Sound of Music? It's literally about a woman running away from the nunnery to fuck a DILF. I don't get it. I get what God would, cause God is a funny little girl, but like, I don't get it.

For example, the only thing that's made me similarly confused is in Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit when it's revealed one of the books that Jeanette's mom reads her all the time is Jane Eyre. And I'm like, "Why would she do that? It's about bigamy, and all that shit." And then it's revealed later in the book that Jeanette has been receiving- every time her mom has read it to her, her mom has edited the ending so that Jane actually marries St. John and joins him to colonize India via being a missionary, and that's why she received it so much, because she didn't receive the real version. But I don't think Sound of Music is being edited up there. So why is this the Heaven musical?

G: Yeah, maybe there's a Ghostfacers effect in Heaven, [C laughs] and they censor the ending as well. 

C: Yeah, yeah. She never gets to fuck that DILF, not once.

G: So sad.

C: It is saur sad.

G: There's this scene where they're like, “Oh, we're too drunk for this. Let's sober up.” It's so disgusting! [both laugh] 

C: Yeah, they fucking shit out the wine, basically.

G: It's so disgusting!

C: They both make constipated faces, and it fills back up.

G: Yeah, the wine bottle fills back up. It may be the most disgusting thing I've ever seen.

C: Okay, I think, a little bit earlier, before they enter the bookshop [laughs] there is a scene that I want to mention, where Crowley's still trying to convince Aziraphale.

G: Is it the one with the “Get behind me, you fiend!”? [both laugh] That is my best line. I wrote it as my best line.

C: Really? I was gonna-

G: Yeah, I loved it!

C: Okay, so what happens is Aziraphale’s like, “Crowley, I'm not helping you. I'm not interested. This is purely social. I am an angel, you are a demon. We're hereditary enemies. Get thee behind me, foul fiend.”

G: And then he goes, “After you.” [laughs] And I think it’s so funny!

C: And okay, the thing about that line. It annoys me because it's clearly a line for the trailer. You know what I mean? 

G: Agh, okay. 

C: Some lines in some things are clearly just for the trailer. They don't make that much sense in canon. Like, it's just a sound bite for the trailer, and it is in the trailer.

G: I thought it was funny! I thought it was funny!

C: It is funny, isolated, which is why it's such a good line for the trailer. But okay. So it did annoy me a bit. However, I also do- if I just take it as part of canon and say that "Okay, sure, he would say that," it's like, I feel like it is the perfect encapsulation of how much they are just play-acting their roles right now, like, he's just saying that to be camp. [both laugh] Like, it means nothing.

I love the ways that they communicate through layers, and then peel back the layers. Good for them.

G: Yeah.

C: Also, Crowley takes his sunglasses off while they're getting drunk, but only after they're partly drunk, which is quite different from, in Season 2, he just takes the sunglasses off whenever he's alone with Aziraphale and not in public. I don't know. I think it's nice that currently, he's at a point where he doesn't fully feel comfortable showing Aziraphale his eyes all the time. But eventually, he does grow to do that.

Oh, also! Everyone- the drunk scene in the bookshop is my favorite scene in the book, and they cut out a bunch of it and you should- we will reblog the audio of David Tennant doing a live reading of that section of the book. It's 10 minutes long, but it's worth it, and I listen to it daily. [G laughs] So go check that out on bustyasianbeautiespod.tumblr.com. 

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G: Anyway, they do a scene after where the nunnery burns down, etc etc. And really, the whole point of that is to just erase all possible ways that they could know that the babies were switched incorrectly.

C: Yep.

G: Aziraphale and Crowley talk more solidly now, more soberly, about what they might do to thwart the evil wiles of the- and this is another line that I loved so much.

C: Oh, yeah, “You see a wile, you thwart.” [both laugh] It’s so funny!

G: Literally you see a wile, you thwart.

C: It's so funny. He's such a silly little guy. Yeah. Basically, Crowley is able to reframe Aziraphale helping him stop the Apocalypse as Aziraphale going against Hell, which is part of his job description. So therefore, "It's fine, you wouldn't be going against orders if you did this."

G: And the way they do it, right, he is very adamant that, even when he goes to Heaven to report what's happening, Heaven doesn't necessarily reprimand him or tell him to stop doing it, because Crowley’s right, like, this is, in a way, part of the job description. But Heaven is still very vocal that, like, “Yeah, it’s not gonna work.”

C: “Yeah, it's nice that you're doing this. But eh.”

G: “But it's not happening.”

C: Yeah. Also, specifically, their plan is that both Aziraphale and Crowley will be involved in the upbringing of the Antichrist, who they think is Warlock, and Crowley thinks that it's fully nurture and not nature. Apparently, part of his job from Hell was to provide evil influence over the baby, and get him ready to take over the world. So Aziraphale’s just supposed to be there to teach him to be nice as well.

G: Yeah.

C: Yeah, which very cute. Yeah, again, I like that this is all a plan that doesn't require either of them to go outside of their job descriptions. It's not like both of them are there telling the kid to be nice beccause if Hell found out about that, Crowley would be tortured, and whatever. It's very malicious compliance.

G: They’re quiet quitting. [laughs] God, what a stupid fucking- Anyway, Aziraphale comes in as a gardener.

C: Yeah. He looks like shit. 

G: Yeah. And Crowley comes in as a nun!

C: Well, as a nanny.

G: And he may or may not look like the hottest person I've ever seen. Oh yeah, nanny! [laughs] I just said nun. Comes in as a nanny, hottest person I’ve ever seen, quite possibly ever. And they just do this thing where every time Warlock goes to the garden, Aziraphale is like. “Oh, you should take care of all the creatures, and you should never kill or hurt them, and should never destroy Earth as we know it.” And he comes in, and Crowley's there, and he's like, “The gardener told me that I shouldn't hurt creatures,” and Crowley is like, “Well you should!” And there's a lullaby scene where he sings a lullaby to the kid.

C: Yeah. Also, David Tennant gets to use his Scottish accent as the nanny. Thank god. It's criminal that they're making him be British, and they're making Michael Sheen, a Welsh actor, be British also in this show.

G: Sad.

C: Sad. I’ve seen some people see Crowley as the nanny as transphobic, and I think the reasoning there is, first, that Brother Francis is supposed to be comical, like, Aziraphale is supposed to look like shit, and his voice is supposed to be stupid, or whatever, right? So it seems that paired with Crowley showing up as a nanny, and being played by David Tennant but dressing in woman's clothes and presenting as a woman in this specific scene, it's like, is it supposed to be tonally similar, where we're like, “Oh, that's funny”? And I did not think that or feel that, but I think some people could, and it is hard to tell what exactly was intended, or what exactly gets portrayed, just because that's not something I felt, but I feel like some people could be like, “Oh, him in that dress is funny.” And then I think another thing is that, maybe less so in the book, or sorry, less so in the show, but in the book, there's a pretty long passage about how like, this nanny shows up, and she has dominatrix vibes, and everyone who sees her is kinda like, “Huh! I mean, what has she got going on there,” which feels like it is playing into transmisogynistic tropes of trans women being oversexualized and only being seen as sex workers, or things like that. So like, I can definitely see that perspective. And I feel like there probably was a way to change the presentation of the scene so that it is less playing into things like that. But yeah, I don't know. And another thing is like, there's been the argument that Crowley is nonbinary in that, there are later scenes where they're presenting as a woman in a way that's not for the sake of a job or something, so sometimes it's something that he likes to do or whatever. But I think that because we see that, in this time period, like, when she's reporting to Hell or whatever, they're in their more masculine-presenting form, so in this case, it isn't just a honest representation of their gender identity at this time, at least, is the vibe that I'm getting. So I feel like that reason why it can't be transphobic doesn't really hold up here.

G: With media this recent, I tend to have the perspective of giving it the benefit of the doubt, because, you know, most of the time, the older the media is, the more probable the concept of it being explicitly transphobic from the writers’ perspective is, but the more recent it is, I am to believe that the writer is more aware of issues like this, blah blah blah. But I get where the perspective comes from.

C: Yeah. Also, this is from “trans in the sense that I've seen on Tumblr” Neil Gaiman. [laughs]

G: Yeah, I know. 

C: In that, yeah, I just don't think he knows that much about trans people, or understands things very well, so I feel like it is easier for him to be sloppy.

G: Yeah, it's shocking to me how much people don't know about stuff like these. So yeah. 

C: Yeah.

-

G: Anyway, they're trying to get the kid to grow up good on Aziraphale's side and evil on Crowley's side.

C: To cancel out to be completely neutral.

G: Yeah, they’re PEMDASing this kid. 

C: [laughs] Yeah. When they leave Warlock at the end, that kid’s gonna grow up fucked up. Like, things don’t cancel out like that. [both laugh] Like, he's been growing up with lullabies about how he's gonna take over the world and kill everyone, and then he's being told to not kill everyone, that doesn't equate to “Guess I shouldn't think about killing in any direction!” [laughs] Good luck to this kid who everyone's gonna think is trans, and has the best name and also the worst upbringing.

G: And also, I find it fascinating that this kid that they tried to neutralize as much as possible, we see him in his eleventh birthday party, and he seems kind of dickish. 

C: [laughs] Yeah, he's kind of a dick.

G: And then we see the the actual spawn of Satan who grew up without all these influences in what we can presume is a normal British household, and he seems to be a nice kid, you know. We don't see much of him, but he has friends, his friends seem to like him, you know, all that crap. So I think maybe if you tried to look into it, there is the perspective of "Adam seemed to have both his parents around and they seem to be nice people," and then, you have Warlock, who grew up in a household where-

C: His dad sucked and was never around, yeah. 

G: Yeah. They're very rich people, and his parents, his dad specifically, may or may not have been present, and all that crap. And it's like, maybe there's something to gain from that perspective. Like, maybe all these things that Crowley and Aziraphale did really doesn't matter [laughs], you know?

C: I mean, it doesn't. 

G: Yeah, exactly. It's not the question of nature versus nurture. It's more of what is the nurture that is happening? And like, maybe Aziraphale and Crowley severely underestimated the other factors in the nurture category, you know?

C: Yeah. I mean, how often does the kid- does any child talk to the gardener? Like, truly, what an odd role. 

G: He had one conversation with a gardener who told him not to kill a slug [C laughs] and for some reason this is gonna change his entire trajectory of his life forever.

C: For real.

G: Anyway, they go to Heaven and Crowley goes to Hell. It's a whole thing.

C: Yeah, the set design is very fun.

G: Yeah! Oh yeah! I said we would talk about it.

C: Yeah, you wanted to talk about that.

G: Hell is presented as kind of an underground seedy club kind of situation. 

C: Though, I mean, there’s no fun music, it’s like a club where the DJ didn’t show up. 

G: I don't know, they're just there. They're talking. It's dimly lit, versus Heaven, which is-

C: Corporate. 

G: A very, very, very lit-up corporate establishment. 

C: Yeah, I love that there's windows, but there's nothing out of them except for blinding white light.

G: [laughs] Yeah, I love that.

C: The illusion of freedom, or there being a world outside, but there isn't.

G: Yeah. I think it's fascinating that they present it this way, 'cause, I mean in Supernatural, they do kind of present it this way, you know. In other media, I would presume that Heaven is kind of like a Garden of Eden kind of situation-

C: Right.

G: - where it's like nature and beauty, and natural beauty whatever, and Hell is hellfire. How is it presented in the books? It’s like this?

C: They... I don't think they ever go to Heaven, except for a bit later.

G: You know what? I think Neil Gaiman may or may not have watched Supernatural and thought, "That’s cool."

C: No, actually, he hasn't. This is something he's answered on his Tumblr. A lot of people have been like, “Oh, I've seen a lot of similarities, haha. Are you a Supernatural fan?” And each time he's gone, “No, but Eric Kripke is a Good Omens fan.” [G laughs] He's never seen Supernatural. But Eric Kripke is a Good Omens fan.

G: So the implication is that the similarities are Supernatural taking from Good Omens? 

C: Well, yeah. Good Omens was published in 1990. 

G: God, that’s funny as hell.

C: It's an old-

G: I know. But that’s why I'm asking, did the book present Heaven and Hell this way? Because, if not, maybe it was a Supernatural-inspired thing.

C: It's possible that the set designers are-

G: Were Supernatural fans? 

C: Yeah, that is possible.

G: There was the one with an angel sigil, right?

C: 'Cause wasn't there an angel sigil in Season 2 that was- okay, but that was just because it was the Enochian alphabet that’s in general created by somebody else.

G: Yeah. But I think maybe they just looked up “angel sigil” and saw a Supernatural angel sigil and went with that.

C: Perhaps. I feel like the idea of Heaven being corporate is a pretty logical conclusion to draw from the way it’s presented with all it’s rules and regulations and stuff. Yeah. I don't know. Maybe a set designer was a Supernatural fan, but I don't think so.

G: Well, I do think so! [C laughs]

C: The Hell scene, we get to meet Beelzebub, who's the Lord of the Flies.

G: Hell yeah! And it's funny because later, they do a thing where the other guy that's calling Crowley is the Lord of the Files. [laughs] And I thought that was just funny as hell.

C: Yes, Dagon, Lord of the Files. That is a pretty funny thing. The thing about Beelzebub is that back in 2019 or something, right, someone asked Neil on Tumblr, “Hey, what are Beelzebub’s pronouns?” 

G: Why is he constantly on Tumblr? Get the fuck off that website, bro.

C: He’s just- I mean, we should also ask why I have read so many of his asks, and whether this parasocial hate relationship is healthy. [G laughs] But yeah, the real question is, why is he always on Tumblr answering those damn asks, instead of doing something of substance? But yeah, anyway. And he said, “zzzzir,” like z-i-r but with a lot of z’s, and it's just a joke about how Beelzebub has flies, enunciates “zzz” sounds in zir name. Later, at various conventions and things, like, people, the actors, Neil himself, are using she/her pronouns for Beelzebub, right, and then finally, we get to Season 2, and it's the first time Beelzebub gets referred to with a pronoun, and the pronoun used is they. I just, if you're gonna make a stupid joke about neopronouns and then, like- okay, fucking follow through, bro.

G: Yeah.

C: That's what I think. Even in the world of fiction podcasts, where nonbinary characters aren't super missing the way that they are in other media, I feel like I still haven't met a character who uses neos, and like-

G: And the thing is, even if this was true, I think there could be a way where you could incorporate this into the show without it- like, it can be a joke, but still a sincere thing, you know what I mean?

C: Yeah, I get what you mean.

G: There could be a way to walk that tightrope. So it's not impossible to do.

C: Yeah. I agree. But Neil Gaiman did not do it, yeah. 

G: Didn’t even attempt to walk it. 

C: Yeah, yeah. It was nice for a while to be able to read fanfictions where ze pronouns were used for a semi-major character pretty regularly, even if it arose from a dumb joke. But yeah, he didn't even try. He didn't even try. He was just like, “Well, close enough, right? All the nonbinaries are the same, right?” And then he just slapped a they/them on Beezlebub after the she/her-ing at cons and stuff. And yeah, I don't know. It's a shitty thing to do, I'm annoyed about it. I don't know. I think that usually when I'm talking to my friends about the show I use the ze pronouns for Beelzebub out of spite. I think I'm not certain what I'm gonna do in the podcast, but we'll see.

Oh, right, funny moment during the Hell thing, Crowley is like, “Oh, yeah, he's growing up to be so evil. It's great.” And then Ligur immediately goes [both] “Has he killed anyone yet?” [both laughing]

G: And he’s like, “[both] No. You know, baby steps.” [laughs]

C: Yup, yup. It’s very funny. 

G: What’s the specific thing he said he was doing?

C: It was like, “He's remarkable, and he's super evil,” and later he's like, “But there's more to evil than just killing people, right?” [G laughs] And everyone just stares at him like he's a weirdo.

Also, Crowley's hair this whole time has been long, which I really appreciate. Once we get to the present present day, he chops it off, and it's like, the most miserable thing that's ever happened to my eyes. But currently, it's long, and he has it half up. What's the name of that style where you take the front part that’s in front of your ears, and you tie it back behind you in a ponytail, but the rest of your hair is down?

G: Oh, it's like a half pony. 

C: Yeah, yeah. That's his hair right now, and it's great. I wish he never changed it.

G: I was actually severely disappointed when-

C: The chop happened?

G: -when we cut to the present and the hair is chopped.

C: I know! I know!

G: 'Cause I assumed- 'cause, you know, he has long hair pretty much this entire episode, and I just assume that Season 1, this is the hair, and in Season 2 it’s gonna be short-

C: God, I wish.

G: - but it’s not, and it made me sad.

C: Yeah, this is the worst act of transphobia Neil Gaiman has ever committed.

G: Yeah.

C: Ugh, god, that's not true. [G laughs] I saw some parts of his earlier comics, and he had a comic where there was a serial killer convention, and one of them talked about how his favorite type of person to kill was pre-op trans women. Like, what the fuck was that about? Anyway.  So.

Meanwhile in Heaven, as you've already mentioned before, Aziraphale is- he's basically in the giving a Powerpoint presentation stance, except there's no Powerpoint presentation, which I think is adorbs. And he's like, “You know, I really think the Antichrist is being influenced towards the light,” and Heaven's just like, “Okay, cool. But you're gonna fail. So it's nice that you're trying, but whatever.” And also one of the angels, I think Michael, says, “Wars are meant to be won, not avoided.” 

G: While they're saying goodbye, one of the angels goes-

C: Yeah, Gabriel goes-

G: “Climb every mountain.”

C: “As the Almighty likes to say, climb every mountain!”

G: “Climb every mountain.” And the thing is, it's both a reference to- you can say that it's not a reference to The Sound of Music, but it can be a reference to when Crowley was like, “You can climb every mountain over and over again," so you can already see that Aziraphale’s face falls a little bit, and he's like, “Uh oh!” and the next line is an angel going-

C: And then Sandalphon comes in, yeah.

G: And- what was it? “Ford every stream.”

C: Yup. Yup.

G: And I just about fucking lost it, like, I started scream-laughing by myself. 

C: It’s a pretty good time. 

G: After this scene, Aziraphale kind of starts becoming a lot more nervous. Crowley and him have this conversation, “What if we fail? What happens?” And then Crowley’s like, “Well, I guess-”

C: “It’s joever. It’s crover.”

G: It's joever. And you can see in Aziraphale’s face, he’s worried, he’s worried sick. And [laughing] it’s so funny to think that the thing that made him this worried about the end [C laughs] is that the fucking angels are referencing Sound of Music. He fucking hates that show so much it’s unreal.

C: Right. Also, I think a fun costume design thing with the angels is- first they're all in these severe gray suits, except Sandalphon, who's in a tan suit, but they all have gold accents on their face. Like, Uriel has a lot of gold makeup on their face, and they look really great, and then Sandalphon, when he says “Ford every stream,” you see that he has a gold tooth. So, I don't know. Fun stuff!

G: What's Aziraphale’s gold accent?

C: He does not have one as far as we're aware, but he does wear a gold ring that I think is supposed to be Heaven-affiliated. So, I don't know. It'd be nice if that was- I don't know if he has a gold mark that he's covering, or- I think Neil Gaiman has referred to the marks as like, more of a fashion thing than part of the actual angelic form.

G: I love that.

C: So it's just Aziraphale's that loser who isn't trendy right now, because everyone else has their gold shit on.

G: Anyway. We go to six days before the end of the world.

C: Yurp.

G: Back in Hell, these two demons are checking on a hellhound. [laughs] And it's just a giant dog that they keep in a room, and they were like, “You think it's like, beastly enough?” And they send in some guy, I don't know, just a soul there, or a demon or whatever, and they send him inside, and they're like, “Watch out for the teeth!” And the,  you know, the beast ravages this poor guy, and they were like, “Well, we did tell him that, you know, to watch out for the teeth. If he didn’t do it, it's not our fault.”

C: Yeah, that is a pretty funny line.

G: God, they’re kinda horrible, I love that.

C: Yeah, I will say, though, I feel like this is fine as a one off, but okay, the demon who gets sent in, his name is Eric the disposable demon, and there's a bunch of forms of him, and he pops up a lot throughout the show, and he is mostly just there to get comically killed.

G: [laughs] Okay. Does it get tiresome at some point?

C: It’s less that it gets tiresome than like, I feel like Good Omens is like, “We did race-blind casting, and that makes us cool.” But I feel like sometimes you should maybe consider who putting in what roles regarding race.

G: Ah, yeah, yeah.

C: Because Eric is played by a Black man. And yeah, as you mentioned, most of the people on the show are white. So yeah. I feel like we'll get into race and casting more when we get to the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. I feel like that's an- yeah. I don't know.

-

G: There’s Crowley and Aziraphale are seated on a bench, watching Warlock and his mom.

C: Yeah, and they’re actually sitting closer to each other this time.

G: Yeah! They’re meeting in the middle. And there's this bit where Crowley is like, “Oh, yeah, I mean, there's gonna be a hellhound at 3 on Wednesday.” [laughs] And Aziraphale is like, “There's gonna be a what? Like, this has never been mentioned to me before.” And Crowley’s just like, “Oh, yeah, there's gonna be a hellhound, and it's going to start the- it's going to mark the beginning of Armageddon when he names the dog.”

C: Yeah. In the book, Crowley didn't know about it until the day before, 'cause Hell just called him about it. But it is funny how in the show it's just like, “Oh, yeah, I knew the whole time. I just forgor.”

G: Also, he tells Aziraphale that like- well, he suggests at first, [C laughs] and Aziraphale doesn't get it. But eventually he does tell the angel that like, “Maybe you should just kill the guy. [both laugh] Maybe you should just kill the kid.” And, you know, Aziraphale is against this, cause he's never killed anyone or anything, really.

C: Yeah. But he never suggests that Crowley do it, which I think is nice. During this scene we get the first time that Crowley calls Aziraphale “angel.” 'Cause Aziraphale’s-

G: I thought- I mean, that is his creature name. But yeah, it's sweet. It's sweet.

C: Yeah. It is very sweet. I feel like sometimes it comes off as more about talking about his species, and sometimes it comes off as just a cute little nickname. And okay, so the specific thing about the hellhound is once the kid names the hellhound, it gives the hellhound its purpose, and then that's when Armageddon starts. And if Crowley and Aziraphale were able to balance out influences correctly, then the kid will see the hellhound, not feel drawn to it, and then send it away without a name, and then Armageddon can't start. So like, that's the mechanics of it. It's supposed to come during his eleventh birthday party, so both of them decide that they have to spy on the party, and Aziraphale starts getting really excited about the possibility of being a magician at the party.

G: Yeah. And he does this thing where he takes out the coin, and it falls on the floor [C laughs] and he’s like, “Wait, wait! Wait, wait!” and then he puts his hand behind Crowley's ear and takes out the coin. He's like, “Ah! It came from your ear,” and the whole time Crowley is just like, “Jesus fucking Christ.” 

C: Like, “This is sooo embarrassing, bro, you’re being so cringe right now.”

G: "This is so humiliating." Yeah. I love to think that at some point in history, when Aziraphale started getting into this, Crowley being like, “Oh, this is horrible!” And then, years and years and years and years later, it's still happening. I love that.

C: Yeah. I mean it has been. It's very, very fun. It ends, what? With Crowley muttering, “I'll make you disappear,” [laughs] when Aziraphale’s talking about disappearing the coin.

G: No. 'Cause there's- you know, he's an angel, so he can just do things, but he doesn't because he thinks the illusion of magic is so much more fun to do.

C: Wow, he’s just like Sam Winchester. [laughs]

G: He’s just like Sam Winchester for real. 

C: Sorry, that wasn’t fair to Aziraphale. But Sam’s not too bad of a guy to be compared with.

G: He goes and does the magic act in the party, and he fucks it up quite severely. He looks stupid as hell in there. [C laughs]

C: He’s drawn a Sharpie mustache on himself.

G: I love that. And the kids tell him that he's rubbish. [both laugh]

C: [laughs] But they don’t say-

G: “And probably-”

C: “-a faggot,” they don’t. They cut out the most important line in the entire book, I'm devastated.

G: Exactly.

C: The thing is like, the funniest thing about this is- Good Omens the TV show is a fun experiment in, like, "What if you wrote a book in 1990 and you said some shitty things in there, and then in 2019, you had the chance to unsay some of those shitty things? Which ones would you pick?" And the other thing about Good Omens is that there's a radio show from 2014, I've listened to it- I just forgot if it was from 2014, or 2015, where Neil Gaiman was also faced with this choice, and in 2014 or 2015, he said, “I'm keeping ‘faggot’ in.” And then, four years later, he went, “You know what, I've reconsidered.” What happened in the middle, Neil Gaiman?

G: He Matt Damon-ified. 

C: Sorry, I didn't hear that, what?

G: I said he Matt Damon-ified. Do you know about that Matt Damon thing where like, randomly in an interview-

C: Ohhhh!

G: - completely unprompted, he just goes. “I've stopped saying the f-slur.” [both laugh]

C: “My daughter was really upset when I said it, and she sat me down, and we had a really nice conversation, and you know what, I get it now, I'm not saying it anymore.” God, I forgot. That was Matt Damon. That's hilarious.

G: Totally unprompted.

C: Because yeah, in the podcast Greater Boston, there's a fictional Matt Damon, he's treated as a pretty good guy, it's Ben Affleck that they hate on a lot. But you're right, Matt Damon did say that. [laughs] Hilarity.

G: I mean, at least he doesn't say it anymore, I guess. [both laugh]

C: God, didn’t Kasey Musgraves, after getting her Emmy, or around the time of her getting her- sorry, why did I say Emmy? Around the time of getting her Grammy, she, unprompted, was like, “Oh, yeah, I also used to say it as an insult, but I don't anymore.” What do people- do they think that saying this will absolve them of their guilt? I don't know, sometimes you just keep that shit to yourself, bro.

G: It was entertaining to hear. [laughs]

C: That's true. It was pretty funny.

G: I think maybe there is a whole like, "If I say it, and then the people who-" it’s weeding out the people who would get mad at you if you- For saying that like, “Oh, you shouldn't say stuff like this.” Maybe it's that perspective, but I don't think- Maybe-

C: Okay, I get the idea of appealing to the audience of people who still say it as like a “Hey, don't anymore.” But was that- I don't think that was really the vibe I got from Matt Damon. 

G: Yeah, I think Matt Damon was just really proud of himself. 

C: Yeah, he was like, “I did a really good job.” He's so like my parents for real. I mean, they don't say the f-slur 'cause they don't know the f-slur, but every year, unprompted, they're like, “Aren't we so much better at gay rights than we used to be?” And I'll be like, “No. Anyway." [G laughs]

G: Amazing.

C: Amazing.

G: Anyway, they start throwing cake at Aziraphale 'cause he was so bad at the magic [C laughs], and the kids are having fun. Anyway, the hound gets released into the world, and because it has super senses, or whatever, it knows that the Antichrist is not, in fact, Warlock, but is, in fact. Adam.

C: Yup.

G: I mean, Adam, as you said earlier, seems to be a nice kid. He's playing in the fucking forest, or whatever. His group of friends called themselves the Them. I love that.

C: This is the future liberals want.

G: Yeah, this is literally the future liberals want. And it already occurred in 2019. Adam is talking about how much he wants a dog for his birthday, and all that crap.

C: Yeah. Pepper has a woman moment, which was sure something, where she says like, “Oh, I wanted a cool bike with gears, and a razor saddle for my birthday, but instead, my parents got me a girl's bike with a basket, and no cool things whatsoever.” And then Wensleydale goes, “But you are actually a girl,” and then she goes, “That's just sexist.” And, ugh. Why can't Neil Gaiman write women? Like, there are women in his life. [G laughs] He’s a people in this world. He can just write women like people in this world. It'd be cool. And like, I think the annoying part is, in the book the line is, she goes like, “That's just sexist, giving someone girly presents because they're a girl.” And when I read that I was like, “Okay, she's being portrayed as making a reasonable point.” But like, what this adaptation tells me is like, oh, no, it's because when they wrote it in 1990, they thought that her original statement was ridiculous and stupid. So now they're just cutting it down to give it the same tone of it being ridiculous and stupid. And the fact that this version is so like, “Did you just assume my pronouns?” You know what I mean? It's sexist to call her a girl is the joke now, and like, I don't know. G: Yeah.

C: And I think I have a special sensitivity towards that, because “Did you just assume my pronouns?” was like, the hot new joke at my high school in tenth grade-

G: Oof, yeah. It also was!

C: - and it made me feel so incredibly unsafe every time I was anywhere in school-

G: Yes, that's true.

C: - 'cause it would just happen during every conversation. So, yeah. Not a fan.

G: I know! It was- God. That was a horrible time.

C: It was so bad!

G: And the thing is, I lived in a very progressive high school. People were very- a lot of people were gay, you know. And a lot of people who were making these jokes were gay people. Like, you're already queer, and you're just punching down, 'cause you don't think that like, whatever whatever is whatever. And it was, you know, very hurtful, etc.

C: Yeah, yeah. Same experience here. Yeah, I feel like me and the one other trans kid around were like, "We've tried telling some people to not do it. And it worked on some people." But most of the time it was just like, "I'm having the most miserable year of my life."

G: I think for me, the experience is- 'cause, you know, I was out as queer but not trans, and the experience is kind of like, "Okay, well!" and then pushing back into the closet kind of situation.

C: Yeah.

G: Which also sucked, but, you know.

C: Yeah. I don't even think I knew I was nonbinary at the beginning of that year, but I was like - I don't think it helped me realize, but definitely I feel like some of the visceral uncomfortableness, I didn't know where it was coming from until I was like, “Hey, what if we weren't a girl?” 

G: Yeah, it's crazy. 

C: Yeah. Oh, you said you couldn’t think of a worst line, for a long time, but I feel like we found one.

G: That's it. This could be it. 

C: Okay.

-

G: Anyway, the hellhound goes to Adam, and at this point he still can't see the hellhound. and he starts naming the hellhound. And there's a lot of suspense where he goes, “Oh, I’ll name it…”

C: “If I got a dog for my birthday, I think I would want him to be named…Dog!” 

G: And then he goes, “Dog!” He also describes the kind of dog he wants, 'cause at some point, one of his friends goes like, “Do you want a Rottweiler?” And he goes, "No, I want a small dog, it’s smart, and all that crap.” And then the hellhound turns into this dog 'cause it's the dog that Adam desired.

C: Yeah, yeah.

G: So suddenly, there's this dog, and it's running to Adam. And now he has a dog, and the Apocalypse is about to start.

C: Yeah. It is so nice that he named the dog Dog, god bless.

Okay, right. Also, before the scene, as we mentioned earlier, you know, Crowley is in the car, and Dagon, Lord of the Files, calls, and is like, “Oh, yeah, we released the dog, and it would definitely go to the right boy. So hello, is it there?” And Crowley is like, “Oh, yeah, mm-hm. Mm-hm. 100%, for sure.” And I guess what I like about the scene is that it also shows the limits of Hell's surveillance. Because they're talking to him through the radio, but Aziraphale’s in the car, and they have no idea, which means that when they're talking to him through a purely audio medium, they can't actually see him in any way, whereas in a later episode they talk to him via a TV, and I think they can see him for that one. So yeah, another cool detail.

But anyway, we cut back to the bookstore, and Aziraphale and Crowley are sitting there and drinking again. And, you know, Crowley’s just like, “This sucks. We've lost the Antichrist. Why did I have to get dragged into this, anyway? It's horrible.” And Aziraphale has another great bitchy moment where he's like, “Well, I think maybe the reason is because you kept sending them memos about how you were so good that you started the Spanish Inquisition [G laughing] and World War II.”  And Crowley’s like, “Okay, first, not my fault that they never check up. Who cares? And secondly, humans beat me to it, so that's not my fault. I totally could have done it myself if I wanted to.” He's such a silly little guy. And then he sniffs the air and he goes like, “Oh, there's something different,” and Aziraphale goes, “Oh, I have a new cologne, my barber suggested it.” [G laughs] And Crowley goes [both] “No, I know what you smell like.” Insane moment, absolutely insane moment. What was the point of any of it? It is not in the book. But yeah. Basically, Crowley senses that wherever the hellhound is, it has found the true Antichrist. And when Aziraphale doubts this, he goes, “Would I lie to you?” And Aziraphale goes, “Well, obviously, you're a demon. That's what you do.” Which, you know, is just them doing their thing again. I really don't know how much either of them believe any of this shit. I feel like Crowley wouldn't say that sentence unless he thought it would still register emotionally, and I think it does still register emotionally. I think Aziraphale just has prejudice reflexes or whatever. But yeah, you know, Crowley ends with being like, “Okay, well, we're doomed.” And Aziraphale goes, “Welcome to the end times.” And, you know, that's the end of the episode.

G: Pretty fun. Pretty good. Pretty great.

C: Yeah. Pretty great.

Grey, how would you rate this episode out of 10?

G: For a pilot, I am a firm believer that TV shows are not supposed to get you in the pilot. Like, "give the first five episodes a go before making a judgment," I'm that kind of person because I am in full awareness that a lot of the times, first seasons of shows are kind of horrible and etc etc. But obviously Good Omens is a different kind of show than the ones that I usually watch, and I think this pilot is actually really good 'cause it fully engaged me. And honestly, I am quite sad that we'll have to wait a week-

C: To watch the next one?

G: - for the next recording. Because I wanna watch the whole season right now.

C: Damn.

G: It has interested me that much. So, alas! Well, so, I think for that, for the way it grabbed me, I would say this is a 10 out of 10 episode.

C: Nice. For me, I mean, this is good. I get to meet my favorite little guys. I think that sometimes, the jokes are too obviously set up, and that makes them less funny to me. Like, there's a scene where Pepper’s like, “Oh, and this dog's just gonna appear out of nowhere?” and then the dog appears.

G: Yeah, and then it did.

C: And it's like, okay, whatever. You don't have to say everything. So I would ding a little for that. But I feel like otherwise, this is, I mean, you're right. It's a good pilot. So I'll give it a 9 out of 10. 

G: Hell yeah!

C: Hell yeah. That’s it for this week's episode of Rubbish and Probably a Podcast. Next time, we will be talking about Season 1, Episode 2: “The Book.” Leave us a rating or a review wherever you get your podcasts.

G: Follow us on social media! We interact through the accounts set up for our Supernatural commentary podcast, Busty Asian Beauties. So catch us on Tumblr at bustyasianbeautiespod.tumblr.com and email us at bustyasianbeautiespod@gmail.com.

C: Thanks to everyone who's donated to our Kofi at ko-fi.com/bustyasianbeautiespod. See you guys next time! Bye!

G: Bye!

[theme song]

-

[beep]

G: I’m eating my Snickers almond brownie dark chocolate. 

C: Wait, it’s a Snickers brownie?

G: Yeah, it’s a Snickers almond brownie and dark chocolate square.

C: Like, that’s the flavor of it, or it’s actually a brownie with Snickers in it?

G: Yeah. No, it’s like a Snickers brand almond brownie. 

C: Huh. 

G: And it’s covered in dark chocolate.

C: That sounds pretty good. 

G: Yeah, it’s way too sweet. 

-

[beep]

G: Do you know that joke with the like- "What is it you cahn't face?"

C: No, what? 

G: There's an Internet meme where- what's the name of the main character in Sound of Music?

C: Maria?

G: Yeah. So Maria goes back to the convent, and she's like, “Oh, I can't do it anymore, blah blah blah." And one of the nuns is like, “Maria. The convent is not the place for hiding. What is it- what is it you can't face?” But like, because they're fucking Austrian, or whatever, the accent makes it sound like she’s calling her a cuntface. [both laughing]

C: Okay, that's pretty good. I don't think I noticed that at age nine or whatever, though. 

[theorist-influencer-untitled]

4.18.24 Thursday

12:45 am

I still have windblow...

Awhile ago or yesterday I went to Ely's house just to check my signal bar on my simcard... It was on and off and almost gone...

So, weird! I need a new phone and I don't have a job, still waiting for Amazon, Exl et al...

So, I saw Jessie awhile ago after checking my bar signal on my simcard coz I still have data. It is just weird that I'm being killed here, I mean someone is removing my signal on my simcard. Hmmm... So, I just reminded him that this coming Friday the opening of the bar outside our village... Hero told us ( me &Ely ) that he will treat us on the opening of that bar outside our village... Then,I feel bad when Jessie told me that he didn't know it....It is a bad character when a friend is just trying to fool you or make words that they can't keep...

I plan to have a drinking session with some village mate men....It is so good to check people as well, sometimes....A lot of new faces here thought that I'm a newbie here but I've been here for almost 30 years...

3:27 am

Still,have windblow....Done, watching "Damsel", it is weird! Just watch it angels... Don't wanna reflect on that....Don't wanna dwell on it but it is an interesting story....

3:45 am

Whew! Perfect Storm or Storms??? Singular Vs Plural... Funny... So, fucking tired for 17 years...

My version ;) "Perfect Storms"???... hahah...

4:32 am

So,fucking scared at this very moment if I have a bf, I will embrace him... Oh! Please switch my soul... My left ear is in pain due to headphone... It will go away right???

I have windblow... But I always make sure that the volume is still on blue line not on red....Red line means louder or stronger volume.

8:32 am

On the way to John's annual update... Preparing..

Uncle DD is here, my stuff will be here, hope nothing will be missing while me and John are outside the house...

8:41 am

Fuck you DJ! Giving hint homicide? Did I hear it correctly??? No guns... Just barehands... Knife can be but no throwing of knives...Fair fight no guns!

9:48 am

Just got back from his annual shots...

Anti-rabies and 8 in 1...

11:02 am

Thanks Uncle Jun from babyJohn for the food. A simple token of appreciation.

11:55 am

Uncle DD will fix their house again....I wanna leave Cavite. It is a personal thing.... He just gave a cheap assistance for food though of course "thank you"! But not enough for me to be presentable in the society... I mean my other toiletries will be coming from Ely my friend. But I know Uncle DD doesn't have enough fundings, something like that... I want a man who can lift me, a handsome man that I like, hoping there is a chance for me to be liked by him example Pilot Garret my super crush and Superman Chef Cedrick.. I wanted to leave Cavite.

Hoping to entrap Pilot Garret but it is somehow impossible...

Issue on wifi that why Uncle Jun didn't pay for it... I said I don't know... Uncle Jun should know his responsibility on that wifi, coz he said he will really shoulder the wifi..

It is not my ideal thing to grow old with them here but I hope there will be an organize harmony here... They are still "my family"...They are still "my blood and flesh" that we need to show off a lil in the society that in a way we are ohkay but not really ohkay... I lost my sweetish side it is now bitterish and lacking of fundings for my personal stuff and my vanity and toiletries made me bitterish...

The wifi should be stable....I feel bitter...

12:32 noon

I need money... I tried working in a call center though not my ideal thing but I know I was good at it... But there were/are people who are always smashing me.... That supposed to be I can travel or fix myself... I have low self-esteem... I want vanity to remove my "deep smile lines". Unfair to die without a fight...

I wanna travel, I feel so frustrated... I wanna buy Starbucks everyday,my shallow happiness even with my super2x crush Pilot Garret, I don't like so much of signatures but I want some fashionable cute stuff, what I wanted is my vanity,my dogs, my Pet Shop and my Starbucks Tumbler... I'm asking only for a middle-class life not elegance not even sophistication. A middle-class country girl but with maintainance of stuff that we need in the house like those steam vaccum, dog stuff blah2x dog stuff are expensive... Just a middle-class that I can do my botox, join a dog show... Have my regular foot spa and my nail gel polish. I wanna curl my hair... My nose perfection...

1:28 pm

Next month, John will have his KC... On May 3rd... It is already paid for me not to worry... It is part of his annual shots....

It is really hot here, I need ac... Whew! John needs ac even nana, it is so fucking hot...

I feel so frustrated.... I wanna leave Cavite...

I want a bathroom renovation but all of my money were all gone now...

I need to leave Cavite, angels... Thinking of my own personal money... I want someone I want... Someone who can lift me... I'm not happy being this way...

I wanna renovate the bathroom outside, supposed to be... The bathroom inside, I need to change the sink and covering on the shower.

4:52 pm

I still have windblow...

It is not my ideal thing to live here with my 2 Uncle's this is just a show-off that we are still "family" coz I have no job.. There are people who are smashing me... But in a way and of course, we are still "family"...

Example if Pilot Garret will take me as his flesh, I want US to have our own life away from here... To take me as his flesh or allowing me to pull out one of his ribs to allow me to be united with him... Of course I have a right to demand that I want US to have our own life. My life with him... My right to get coins from his pocket.

10:04 pm

I still have windblow... My aunt Teresa is not replying on me...Sometimes, I'm doubting on Uncle DD and Aunt Teresa. Sometimes I want my Aunt Teresa be in heaven or to go with God coz she is not helping me now...

I hate people who are jealous of me... Did Mitch give me a "simple battery"???

I wanna get a life away from here... I'm surviving but not happy or the right thing is not satisfied... But still again,I need to keep my "family" but with smart way of linking with them...

I feel self-pity, why I can't get a bf that I want... Is that bad if I want someone from youtube? Or I can't find a new "true love"???

10:36 pm

I'm not yet fixing... People on youtube how did they fix themselves???

Sometimes, I feel jealous, like the girl with Pilot Garret coz she is well-fixed... That's why they are perfect together??? Tell me angels... Am I ugly not to have him???

10:41 pm

He will not like me coz I have scratch on my left hand today, I accidentally bump my hand on the trycycle...

I have ugly hands these days coz I'm moving now... I don't have assistant... I'm not a "Damsel" but "Cinderella" of guilty and mean, fucking people for 17 years??? Will you hate coz I have scratch on my left hand now...

[gailynovelry]

friendship(?) terminated with Amazon, now Itch.io will be my best friend

[aprillikesthings]

Spite donations

So my evening adderall has kicked in and I wanna talk about the concept of spite donations, because 1. it's such a great idea I want more people to know 2. I want to encourage myself to do it more.

Say you're in an argument with someone, especially online. Here, twitter, facebook, reddit, the family group chat, what the fuck ever. They're being stupid or mean or whatever, but you can't get them to see logic or compassion and they're frustrating you.

You know you're not going to change their mind. But blocking them might feel like giving in. Or they're a relative or a friend and you don't want to burn that bridge just yet. Or you did block them/close the app, but now you have all this anger burning away at you and you feel like shit.

Walk away from the argument (literally or metaphorically). Take a deep breath. And donate money to a person or non-profit out of sheer fucking spite.

(OBVIOUS CAVEAT ONE: Not everyone can do this. I know that. There have been times in my life where I could not even spare $5. I am painfully aware that I am lucky that I can do this sometimes. But that just means that those of us who can afford to do it, should. Imagine that I am doing it on your behalf. I love you.)

If the donation is related to the argument you're having, that's cool! I once got in a rage at a friend's relative on facebook who was denying that voter ID laws are racist (they are, side note; and I gave her lots of information on it) and she was furious that I Was Calling Her Racist!!!11!! So I looked up a couple of voting rights non-profits in her state (one fights against voter suppression laws, the other does the nitty-gritty of helping people get ID's and get to the polls), checked on a couple of non-profit watch sites that they were legit, and donated $50 to each of them.

(I admit I was more spiteful than usual, and posted screenshots of my email receipts to the thread. It did shut her up, so there's that.)

Donate to abortion funds in the name of anti-choice politicians or family members. Donate to a local environmental non-profit when your uncle is a shithead about climate change. Donate to the gofundme's of transgender strangers for their rent or gender-confirming surgeries when JKR pops up in your twitter trending.

BUT it doesn't HAVE to be related to the thing you're angry about.

Lots of shelters and other charities that do direct aid for people have amazon wishlists. I have the the wishlist of a local day shelter for homeless folks on my amazon account. Sometimes when I don't know where else to donate money I just pick random shit off their wishlist. Thanks for making me furious, random asshole on reddit, some homeless woman just got NEW UNDERWEAR AND WARM SOCKS. FUCK YOU.

Look, righteous indignation is an addictive feeling, and the internet is basically primed to give you opportunities to feed into it. Use that urge to do actual good! If nothing else--if you're like me? The feel-good dopamine hit of knowing I'm helping a cause I believe in or even a random stranger? That's a much better bit of dopamine than I could possibly get from yelling at people online.

But also: there's a kind of relief? Often it's just difficult to walk away from an argument. Some days I am better at this than others. But tossing a few bucks at someone who needs it gives me a kind of satisfaction, like I "won" the argument.

"But April, recurring donations are better for most non-profits." I agree! 100%! Did you know that if you use paypal to donate to non-profits, that paypal can keep a list for you and when you go on your account there's an option to do it again? Make a couple of charities/non-profits your default "Fuck This Guy" donations.

It doesn't have to be a lot. $20 is still something. $10 is still SOMETHING.

Don't just get angry. Donate some money.

(OBVIOUS CAVEAT TWO: If you have the time/energy/resources, volunteering is also an amazing option. Or just doing something kind for others when you can. A genuine compliment to a stranger can go a long way to lift the spirits, for them AND you. This is just one method, among many, for dealing with the brokenness of the world. The antidote to hopelessness is action.)

[venusiangguk]

BUDGETING

dont know if everyone will still want to know on budgeting lol

I don't want to sound like a bitch yk

BUT

I think the most important thing for me was learning to give yourself the freedom to enjoy things like little by little

I used to do this thing where I was uptight for a super long time and then I wpukd splurge huge amounts and for nothing.

I'm not religious either but I truly believe that setting out a little each month/week for charity is great bc it's always comes back in a form that's greater you know.

Pay rise, new job opportunities, idk good things.

Ik it sounds cringe and gross but I think it's worth it !

THE STEPS LMAO

Okay so I always but in 40%-45% like in the bag already savings I mean (this can obvs be adjusted to fit your own needs but if say keeping over 30% is key!)

And work around everything else in the steps below !!!

If I was brave enough I would send pictures of my last year budgeting plan and how I managed to save !! But I'm not 😭😭😭

the first step for me would be to list your monthly income !

Monthly is way easier to work with and easier to adjust in the long run !

Second would be list out things that have to be paid always. So fixed expenses.

I.e rent, MOT, bills, food ( for this I would highly recommend just having a monthly shopping of like say £20-25 - seems un do able but isnt !!! Frozen veggies are your best friend:)) gym membership, spotify, prime all of that.

Third which is super important for me at least would be to set out a like reward bonus for yourself.

( in cash preferably- like so once it's gone it's gone you know- like monthly rewards for yourself - sometimes you use it and sometimes you dont!! )

Fourth - ALWAYS SET AN EXTRA LIL FUND FOR THE UNEXPECTED THINGS!!! ( car crashes, dentist, medicine if your toaster breaks if your fridge breaks !! all of that lovely stuffs 😃)

So when you look at all that infront you- really just scrutinise it.

Like -

How much of that do you really need to spend?

Is there anything you can cut out on ?

This is super important at least to me bc then I see that yh shit - that is crazy I'm spending useless money )

I think that also keeping student loans separate is SUUUUPER SUUUUPER bc it just. Idk if anyone else is like this but seeing how much they expected from me to be able to learn always depressed me so I made a separate folder for that- made it pretty so it didnt look sooo bad lmao ) but I think the biggest part was getting to grips that I had all that to pay back!!!

Then like random things :

Concerts, events, holidays.

Like make sure you have them planned in advance and make separate funds for all of them.

To cater to what they need! Like for a concert- hotel and food money and merch buying and army bomb and a NEW OUTFITTTT lmao)

And yh - I think setting up a teeny amount for charity or to help ppl is always great aswell bc well idk you feel good and it does always come to find you- doesnt have to be a large amount. Maybe even a food box every month or smn cute and sweet like that !!

This is how I did it : ( kind of irrelevant and just abt silly me lmao but maybe itll help(?))

So i used to work night shifts at this horrible packing place ( it was freezing too but the pay was so good! It was £15-18 an hr ( sometimes even more )and I used to work from 11pm-4am 7 days a week like I didnt take a day off until I quit and i did it for 2 years ! That was like 50k but I had a lot of things to pay off and my parents wanted nearly all of it back off of me 😃)

This is also the NOT the job I wanted yk? Like I used to work with a bunch of stinky ass men and it sucked but I had to do it bc well my parents kicked me out bc I was non religious looool.

I was never enough and I just got kicked out yk? ( oh no not my sob story but just to put it into perspective sort of like I was fucking depressed my money was going like wildfire )

So I had to kind of take everything/every opportunity. They expected a lot back from me too in that way like alot of my learning was going to them :/)

From 5-7

I worked at a bakery ! Cooking and baking and having fun! That was the best job I had the pay wasnt all that but it was something and I needed everything I could get ! It wasnt everyday either but so and so.

I also am bilingual so that way I was able to get a job as a teacher in a daytime school teaching which I did voluntarily! For the first year !

( I had this routine for 2 years!!)

So like I was getting an okay amount from these jobs but god heavens I was spending so unnecessary.

Like a high price for a shit apartment where I would have to pay for things to get fixed to and that was really expensive.

My parents also took alot first year earnings and that's when I was like well shit I have nothing I really need to like get my shit together yk?

There was student loan (- I dont want to like envoke sympathy bc of all this I just wanna like say that my money was kind of slipping away yk I feel like I'm being annoying 😭😭😭 ) - and just a whole lot of wasting on food ( my biggest expenditure- at the time I was struggling with binge eating and bulimia so 🙃🙃 yh )

Dumb shit off amazon, and like just crap you know

Also car petrol and mot and car stuff. and bus and train fares just money can go so easily.

It was just super super tiring to have juggle all these balls at once but when I got the hang of it like doing all those steps I felt more free and more aware of myself and I was able to enjoy while still getting yk the most out of what I do.

I work as a translater/teacher now so the pay is good and like using these steps is how I got the most out of myself

Uh idk If this even makes sense anymore and I'm sorry if come off as bitch too

I don't mean to or come with a sob story

I just think its important to like realise that no matter what and who in your life demands things from you - you always have to choose to look after yourself first- how you choose too look after yourself is ultimately how you choose to look after others too ! Take good care of yourself - give yourself a clearer mind and you'll be able to see a bigger picture- outside of the one built for you !!

If your struggling with other issues - mental health too it can help bring clarity to that too ! Bc it's some sort of semblance.

Gosh I feel gross what if you have to read all of this 😭😭😭

I hope it helps you ♡♡

Budgeting is really important bc we need to buy houses!!

Need property!!!

Start our own businesses !!

Become our own bosses !

It's just super important to know your expenses you can know yourself better too !

And you can be more mature and more self aware

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Gosh I really ate your ear off with this one

for everyone wondering about our bestie w 50k savings: this is her story !!