#but yeah also it would be triggering as fuck and when I saw someone point it out it all clicked

[neatfrog]

I’m honestly surprised at myself for not noticing/thinking about how Stolas was very likely triggered by Blitzø stomping after him and screaming/insulting him because he dealt with it so much from Stella. As someone who has *been* in an abusive relationship, it takes so long to get out of that fight or flight mindset where you just shut down the second someone starts yelling (at least in my case). It’s been like 8 years now and I still flinch at loud voices even if they’re not directed at me.

soooo yeah I don’t blame Stolas for booting him out at that point

[v88sy]

ahem [*aims bazooka at the hornet nest*] the way anti tommy fics characterise Tommy is the way that canon Eddie has been treating Buck this season [*pulls the trigger*]

(more nuanced: obviously not referring to the DV or SA, but the whiplashing hot/cold, the casual cruelty, the "Buck's only useful when he's usable" attitude, that's all canon Eddie in s8. and to add to the irony, the way they characterise fanon eddie in these fics? that's canon tommy.)

.

.

.

.

(obviously given the state of this fandom right now I'm 100% not expecting this to get posted, I just felt the Urge to say it after seeing your post about the bucktommy tag on ao3 because yeah, it's fucking atrocious but it's only going to give bucktommy better ratings in the yearly wrap so who's really winning here)

Ooooooo, ok, I'm gonna gently grab your hand (with consent) and we're gonna walk together through this one because I'm bravely posting it.🤣

So, I've said before that I think their fanon Eddie is basically canon Tommy. Gay. Repressed by comphet. Failed relationships with women because he was too scared to admit who he really is. And, how they think Eddie would treat Buck in a romantic relationship are all ways in which Tommy has actually been shown to.

I think the only buddie fics I've ever read were from my partner in crime, and I purposefully don't click on any 'Tommy Kinard Bashing' fics (which, as an aside, relies on the author to have the common decency to at least tag correctly. More on that later) but in the particular case that spurred my original post, I just clicked on the comments because I wanted to see if there were any fellow buddies calling them out, which, yes, I have seen before on other fics. Things along the lines of "I'm a buddie fan too, but not like this."

Now, on to the fics themselves and not just how they're tagged. Fics like that, and like the 'anonymous hidden csa' fics that were being thrown in our tag...someone had to sit down and write that.

Like, I'm not trying to tell people what to write, and so this rant is more so just a me thing, but I honestly never did understand how someone could...even stomach that.

To write a (completely OOC) Tommy bashing fic where he's the most vile of the vile, or a csa fic with the intention of disguising what it really is in the hopes that we'll read it and be triggered...first someone has to sit there and bring the words into their brain. They had to make those words appear on a screen. And then, they had to post it to ao3, knowing full well what they are doing and that they are forcing it onto a collection of people that do not even want to know that it exists in the first place. Like. It just boggles my mind how someone could do that. I'd never be able to write the first sentence, let alone do all the rest of it.

I know I got sidetracked some from your original ask, but I do also agree that the way Eddie has been treating Buck this season is just...not it.

During season 7 hiatus, I wanna say shortly after we got bi Buck, I went back and rewatched the entire series again. I've watched live since day one, but was never really in the habit of watching an episode again once it had aired or sitting there and dissecting it once I pushed the 'off' button on the remote.

And let's just say, this time around, I really saw just how one sided that "friendship" is, and just how little "evidence" or "chemistry" there is pointing to buddie. All that just got turned up to 11 this season, and I truly do not comprehend how anyone could think "buddie canon" has "never been closer."

Mandatory PSA time: this isn't about chill multishippers or chill buddie shippers even. I know and talk to some and they're great. If you've never done any of the things above, then this ain't about you.

[invinciblevariant]

in your hour of need , i'll be there . . . [ mark / rex ] .

a lovely anon known as "glass" requested a fic of markrex hurt/comfort , and i'm here to deliver ! i really hope you (and those others reading this) enjoy !

synopsis ; a particularly nasty battle with yet another monster attacking earth leaves rex bloodied and bruised . there is nothing new about this , except the person who comes to see him afterwards , which may or may not spark some ... feelings . pairing ; mark x rex . timeline / changes to series ; set toward the beginning of s3 . mark confessed his love for eve , but she rejected him ( and she and amber began dating bC IM THE AUTHOR OF THIS STORY DAMMIT ) . trigger / content warning(s) ; blood , gore mention .

this is such bullshit .

rex knew he was signing up to get his ass kicked when cecil reported of unusually hostile activity in the southern region of chicago . he also suspected that it would be an alien creature , but what he didn't suspect was that this alien would be damn near impossible to take down , even with the rest of the guardians' help .

this is certainly nothing like taking on the flaxans , but fortunately , not like fighting viltrumites , but still , this monster-looking fuck is stronger than it seems .

" can't we call someone else to come help ?! " monster girl yells as she attempts to put the alien in a headlock , getting easily tossed into robot . rex throws explosive after explosive to try and distract it , but it doesn't even react .

then , he realizes something ... not only is this creature strong as all hell , it's also blind .

" hey , guys , i have a - ! "

before rex is able to finish , the creature grabs him and slams him into the wall of a building , almost sending the whole thing down on top of him . as rex is getting back up , it pounces on him and digs its claws into his sides .

the scream he lets out can most likely be heard around the entire world .

after the creature is kicked off him by bulletproof , rex surveys his injuries . fuck , he's not supposed to be able to see his innards ...

after staring for what feels like hours in horror and shock , the world goes black and he collapses against the debris .

rex awakens in a hospital room in the gda's medical facility , his sides bandaged up and an iv drip in his arm . nothing he's not used to at this point .

" man , " he yelps slightly as he hears the voice beside him chuckle , " you look like shit . "

... mark ?? huh ... this is new . he thought for sure that it would be rae sitting beside him , waiting for him to wake up .

oh , god , rex hopes mark can't see the way his face flushes red ... or the raging boner he's starting to get .

" yeah , well , you would know about looking like shit after a fight , wouldn't you ? " he bites back , though there's absolutely no hostility in his tone .

mark laughs at that - dammit , why are there butterflies in his stomach ? - and gets up from the chair , strolling across the small space to stand beside the bed .

" well , " he says , " eve texted to come check up on you since she and amber are looking at apartments across from the college . "

" oh , so you're not here out of concern for your best friend ? you're doing so because my ex-girlfriend and your former unrequited lover told you to ? "

now it's mark's turn for his face to flush red , and he rubs the back of his neck . " n-no , i came because , when i saw the text ... i ... " he looks rex in the eyes . " i was concerned for you ... you'd never been that badly hurt before , and ... i was ... "

rex gets a knowing look on his face before smirking teasingly . " you were that worried about me that you stuck by me the minute you saw the text , weren't you ? "

he swears that he's never seen the shade of red that mark's face turns shortly after that , and he sputters . " sh-shut the hell up , man !! "

" awwwww , " rex continues to tease , reaching over to poke at the viltrumite teen's side , loving the way mark squirms and hides his face in his hands afterward , " you were as concerned as eve would've been . y'know , she would've shut me up by now by kissing m = "

mark's lips pressing deeply against his shut him up , and rex absolutely melts into the gesture . he feels a hand cup his cheek , very much like eve would've done , and mark climbs onto the bed to straddle the injured superhero .

thank fuck for the morphine the gda gives ...

minutes feel like hours before the door swishes open and mark scrambles off of rex's bed , almost tripping over the iv stand . cecil enters the room , seeming oblivious to the position the two men were just in mere moments before , and informs rex that he can leave the hospital in a few days before heading out just as quickly as he came in , talking through his earpiece to some agent .

" don't mention this to anyone , " mark states when he sees the smirk on rex's face , though his tone indicates no seriousness whatsoever .

rex only chuckles and grabs his arm , pulling mark back onto the bed so he can lay beside him .

he's totally telling the rest of the team about this later ...

[ilium-ilia]

I don’t know man, I figured I would ask you personally about this because I’ve gotten two asks now that were quite rude about it, saying I shouldn’t “copy” fics or steal your prompts. But I made a post saying that I had a horrible dark fic idea inspired by your “hole in the earth” fic. I didn’t go into much detail about it in the post but in the tags all I said was that I was thinking about a sort of aftermath situation of it, if John died and the Reader character went insane, trigger warning for child death in the idea I was having. Basically in no way actually copying your fic, just inspired by your work. The lobotomy, if I were to even actually write it, probably wouldn’t even be mentioned and more focus on Stockholme syndrome and kidnapping. Sorry this is long but I’m just kinda annoyed by the anons I’m getting, does this bother you? Seem too close to your work for comfort? Would you call it “copying”? - @cobwebs-in-autumn

Okay, well I didn't want to make this public, and you blocked me, and I'm tired of people walking all over me when it comes to stealing my work, I'm going to explain the situation here and set boundaries right now. Again. Because I'm so sick and fucking tired of dealing with this.

First off, I would like to say don't harass this person. Don't send anon messages, or hate, or comment on their posts, or anything. I'm only bringing this out because you guys need to learn to respect writers. I've deleted two accounts because of shit like this and I'm NOT letting it get to me a third time.

Anyway, so I get sent this anon message. The fic they're referring to is one that isn't posted on tumblr, but is here on AO3. It's a very dark fic, basically where Price kidnaps a wife, and when she doesn't act the way he wants her to, he has her lobotomized so that she's more "docile." It's a horror fic. This person then decided that they wanted to write a continuation of the fic, therefore stealing my idea without my permission. (no matter how much they want to claim they were only inspired, a continuation without permission is still stealing!!)

Now, many of you had kindly pointed out to this person that the idea was very similar to mine. And they very much admitted in this anon ask that it was an aftermath situation of MY fic. But this seemed to annoy them.

"I’m just kinda annoyed by the anons I’m getting"

(you know what else is annoying? people copying or "finishing" your works without permission!!)

So, I then went to this person in dm's to tell them, yeah no, I'm not cool with this at all.

because frankly, why the fuck would i be cool with that lmao. I was pretty short with my messages, but I was being firm. Like I've done this shit before, I'm not doing it again.

They do not respond to the message, and instead, ignore me and reblog their post with this.

Which is fucking amazing actually. So insanely disrespectful that I couldn't help but laugh because how do you see someone saying "Hey, this makes me uncomfortable and you're stealing my idea" and you go and post that? "I feel this is far enough" But you're not going to talk it out to the writer you claim to respect so much?

Anyway so I point this out in the dms because that's just insanely disrespectful.

And I also commented because I was getting anxious that people were going to start pushing them to write the idea that was pretty much mine lmao.

Eventually they responded with this:

Which is also just fucking insane. Basically gaslighting me saying "oh I'll just write something similar but not" (Not to mention the fact their new idea sounds like early's fic anyway lol) But no apology, just fucking clout chasing using my name and idea, for whatever reason. So I sent them a rather rambling response about how that this still isn't okay, I still never received an apology from them, or anything of the like.

And I'm sure you guys saw some of my posts because I was upset. (the misgendering and the incorrectly correcting my name, and saying how i'm not at all okay with people using my works as inspiration). This has happened to me so so so often (and many other writers!) and I'm sick of it. It's annoying. This person has written so many other works and ideas that were their own and that's what I love about fandom- but this? Yeah.

So I waited for a response from them. Clicked on our messages and oh?

Everything's gone. weird. maybe send another message.

oh!

maybe it's tumblr. logged out. logged back in. no history with them in my dm's period. (mind, I can still message everyone else just fine!)

So yeah. This is bullshit, and I'm sick of it. Private conversations do not help. I'm tired of trying to protect people who are wronging me for the sake of their feelings when they so obviously trample and disregard mine. Especially with these answers to your asks here:

This is so frustrating.

Writing continuations of someone's work is never okay. Writing ideas based off of their work without asking them is never okay. And to block me when I point out my discomfort just because you're (assumingely) upset i didn't take your side? And STILL keeping the post up? (at least at the time I'm posting this) Yeah, sorry, I'm tired of letting this shit slide and keeping this quiet. I tried to reach out in DM's to resolve it quietly and that didn't work.

Respect your writers. This is a community. Ask people. If you like my idea so much, then maybe comment or tell me in my asks instead of ripping me off. I'm literally always so happy to talk about my ideas and "what if's" and I'm sure many other writers are too! We literally scream it from the rooftops!

But no, you'd rather steal my shit for clout instead.

again: do not fucking dogpile on this person. just block and move on. unfortunately this isn't their main account, so they're gonna be able to see my shit no matter what I do, but oh well. maybe at least we can all learn that this is not cool at all.

anons are off for now, and any stupid asks will just be blocked/deleted.

[bbyboybucket]

So I wrote up all this stuff weeks ago and drafted it and forgot about it until I seen these tags from @kahuna-burger

And they are absolutely right. And I’m so glad someone agrees with me on this analogy, because this is EXACTLY how I see him, and exactly what I get into below. This is the whole thing I was writing up previously:

“The winter soldier was treated like a living weapon.”

Mmm, yes. The whole living weapon thing is not a wrong metaphor. But I’d argue that there’s something else far more accurate (aka what the now added tags say).

He wasn’t their weapon. He was their dog. In such an uncanny way, almost literal sense. I wouldn’t even say a guard dog, I’d actually say he was Hydra’s hunting dog.

I mean think about it. Really. They actually treated him like a dog.

He wears a harness. He wears a fucking muzzle for gods sake.

But that’s just the bare minimum of similarities.

What do they do when he gets out of line? To punish him, to put make him obey and learn to fall back into good behavior? They shock him. Just like how people have always used shock collars and electric fences for dogs. When he’s been “bad”, when he does something he’s not supposed to, he gets shocked to correct that behavior.

They also smack him and get physical. People don’t do that with weapons. There’s no point in that. And you wouldn’t wanna damage or harm a weapon. But people do smack dogs. They hit their dogs when they don’t behave or do something wrong because harm, pain, and damage will teach it. Just like it teaches him. And they’ll heal so it’s not a concern.

He was trained to obey commands. Just like dogs. He does any little thing he’s told because he’s conditioned with a rewards system. He even has specific command words that trigger compliance. Just like you teach a dog to sit or roll over with trigger words, he has em too. I mean literally, he has a Pavlovian response to said words. And what was the original Pavlov experiment done on? A dog. The only difference is he doesn’t get physical treats. His treat is praise, which they manipulated him into being desperate for. They even go as far to incentivize him with this praise (think about the bank scene, where Pierce praises him), just like you would present a dog with a treat when you want it to do a trick. Hell, actually praise is a way you reward dogs too, because they listen and learn when you tell them they’re a “good boy, good dog”.

Hydra asserts their dominance over him just in case he turns on them, just to remind of who’s the “alpha”. Because they know (just like big dog owners) that he can tear them up, he can attack and shred them to pieces, but if he thinks he’s not the “alpha” then he’ll back down.

And yeah, he’s protective and reliant on his “owners” like most dogs would be. But like I said, not just a guard dog. A hunting dog. Because just like people teach their dogs to track down and go after bears, squirrels, dear, etc. he was also taught how to track down stuff to kill. Stuff that his owner wanted dead. That’s his whole purpose, to hunt for them.

Also, think about how Hydra obtained him. It’s like if a person saw an injured dog in a ditch, brought it to a vet to heal up, then took it home to have as their own pet. Because that’s exactly what they did with him. It’s just the owner was an abusive one.

He wasn’t treated like some expensive tank or powerful arsenal of guns. He was treated like well trained hunting dog.

[brucewaynehater101]

Look maybe it’s just me but if I saw my little brother spiraling I wouldn’t just corner him in a graveyard once to talk about therapy then let him fuck off to go globe trotting

I mean... kind of I'm trying to be more canon accurate in my posts, so I apologize for correcting ya.

Cassie was the one to meet Tim in the graveyard. Dick met him at the city bounds.

Here's a funny pic of Dick as payment

Bruh. I'd either be so intimidated or so mad if Dick did this to me.

"We need to talk." After what Tim walked into of Damian wearing the Robin suit because Dick didn't talk to him until after the suit was made? I'd be mad (this is not an anti Dick. This is just how I would feel).

Anyways. Dick didn't let Tim go. Tim held him at staff point and guilt tripped the man into letting him go (not anti-Tim either).

Re-reading it again, I still think Tim is an unreliable narrator.

However, Tim is all like, "Hey, I know I sound nuts. I know how it looks, but I know I'm right." He provided examples of how he can, in fact, understand where Dick is coming from.

And then Dick is all like, "I know how you feel, but you need a therapist." Which... yes, but that's not the point. Tim is bringing up all this horrid shit in his life and acknowledging how he understands Dick's viewpoint (while also saying Dick is only there cause Cassie called him). Then Dick claims to understand Tim's perspective, but only from Dick's "Tim must be seeing things where isn't anything instead of grieving" viewpoint.

Basically, they aren't communicating with each other efficiently (they are also physically fighting each other while doing this too).

It's a mess. A hot mess.

Dick is trying:

But he's also just not listening to Tim. He's not giving Tim the benefit of the doubt. He's concerned af, but he's not listening or trusting Tim. He's just going at it from his own worried mentality that Tim's going down a conspiracy bender. I don't blame Dick for not communicating well (poor man is going through so much at this point [Damian, JLA, switching to Batman, etc]).

However, I also understand Tim's perspective. He doesn't trust Dick to actually listen to him. Dick wants to help Tim Dick's way and not what Tim believes he needs.

I personally get very very triggered if my boundaries are not met. If someone held on after I told them to let go? Yeah. Hands are being thrown. I also get triggered if people try to force me to do shit, don't listen to me, or try to do "what's best for me" when I've told them no. Real quick way to get cut off by me.

That's off topic, lmao.

Anyways, Dick kind of let Tim go, but that's because Tim forced him to. It wasn't because Dick didn't care, but he didn't care in the way Tim wanted him to (debatable if that's not how Tim needed either).

I'm curious. Are there any comics that cover that scene from Dick's POV? I'd appreciate it if anyone could let me know ^^

Also, I agree I would not do what Dick did here. On the other hand, my siblings and I have worked very very hard for the relationships we have. It's taken years of trial and error to get the boundaries and level of communication the way it is. We all agree to allow the others to make decisions for themselves and fight their own battles unless otherwise asked (I had a habit of trying to help and fix the situation for them when I was a teen. Now we just inform and offer help. Lots of acknowledgment for boundaries as well). If my siblings want to make dumb decisions, I let them. Just as they would for me. I might tell them I think that's dumb as hell, but it's their life.

If Tim was my sibling, I'd say something like, "I'm not sure I believe you, but I trust you. If this is what you need, if you think this is true, I'll support you. Would you like my direct assistance with this?"

If they say no, then I'll respond with, "Okay. I can handle Gotham as long as you keep me in the loop. If it's been 48 hours without contact, I will hunt you down. I love you."

Then we'd hug goodbye.

On the other other hand, there's not this age gap between us. Dick is 7 or so years older than Tim, and Tim is a teen. Dick may feel it's his responsibility to look after Tim and might be hitting the road bumps I did with my siblings (of giving them the respect and trust to handle their own issues as well as know what they need).

So, the situation is a hot mess :)

[6feathered6siren6]

Spiderverse KC! Dabbles and HCs

Authors note: This is mostly dabbles and random things I thought of while in my spiderverse hyperfixation(again), I've been also somewhat sketching on what they would look like. On request of my friend after fighting for a few hours(and to make sure she doesn't hate bomb), these do not follow spiderman canon stories or events, just some fun of if the Killer chat! Love interest was in the spiderverse. I might come back to this idea on a future thing. Btw, you can view these romantic or platonic, up to you!^^

Trigger warnings

Killings/deaths

Injuries

ooc?

Cringe(But i'm free)

You were shoved into one of the interdimensional portals, meeting back into the spiderman headquarters. Shoving your mask up as you walked around, grabbing a coffee from another spiderman who was a barista. Waving to a few acquaintances until you found an open window. Sliding out to the breezy wind and cool air, walking up the building. Humming softly until you get onto the roof. Sitting on the edge of it. Taking a swing of your coffee as you look out to the futuristic universe. This is worth it in your opinion. Worth fighting and getting back up. 

“READER!” Recognizing that voice, it was Misaki. Looking at them swinging up with the webs to almost tripping, or in their words, ‘landing gracefully.’ They plopped down next to you, looking into the scenery as well. She playfully punches your shoulder with a gleaming smile.

“Hey, Misaki.” You spoke as you smiled back. 

“So everyone is going to be late, something about having to help V with some crook. And left me out of it, can you believe it?” They spit raspberries as they looked grumpy for a moment until laying their head on your shoulder. Looking back to their playful self. “Well, they are missing out on ‘you’ time. I get you to myself!” 

You felt yourself chuckle. “I guess so. So how’s your universe?”

“Same old, same old. You already know all that boring stuff.” 

It felt such a small amount of time pass, but it was a few hours until the missing members came alone. 

“There’s the losers,” Misaki yelled out as they saw them swinging and landing onto the roof. “Can’t believe you left me out in a fight, I would love to punch a guy or two in the face.”

Angel sat next to you while V sat next to Misaki. You turned your body to face Ronin as he stood. “Yeah, yeah. Blame Mr. Serious over there.” He points to V as V glares at him.

“You were the one who lost track of him. I told you to watch him while Me and Angel chase the main perpetrator.” V didn’t look pleased, like one more thing will make him gut the devil looking spiderman. 

“Yeah, and whose fault is that?” Ronin leans down to V, a smirk that scream fuck-all. 

“Enough you two, we are here for a good time, not to fight. Wait until we spar, then you can throw hands at each other.” Angel spoke, the two listened, and Ronin sat next to Angel, wrapping his arm around her.

“That’s boring, we can always spill blood anytime and all the time.” Angel's response to Ronin was rolling her eyes. 

Sitting there, sure, they’re bickering, but felt like a place you belong. A place you can always go back to. A place like home. 

⛧⛥⛧

Ronin(SpiderDevil)

Ronin has invited you to stay at his timeline for a bit. It was different from the time you're from, but you didn’t care. The anti-hero before you was dragging you through his city, swing after swing. Until he got to a high building, catching you when you fumbled the landing. 

“Do not tell Misaki, I will never hear the end of this if they know.” You groaned. 

“Don’t worry, Darlin’. I won’t spill your secrets.” His chuckle sent shivers down your back, but you ignored them. His grin might be sadistic but he was true to his word, he won’t tell them. At least, you hoped. 

Looking into his world, it was chaotic like him but a sense of calm. He was looking down, scoping for something, a bad guy? Someone to kill? You never know with him. 

Staring at his costume, his superhero persona looks, he mentioned that he made it himself, calling himself the devil. Having the world also call him the devil. 

“Staring too long will make me wonder if you have fallen for me, Darlin’.” He turns his head, smirking almost gleefully. “Shoving your aorta to the devil is something you can’t turn back on.” 

You rolled your eyes as you shoved your mask up, and smiled back at him. “Maybe I do, shoving my heart into your hands.” 

He whistles, before even making a comment back, a scream comes from nearby. He turned to the direction of the yelling, then back to you. Smirking sinfully, giving a two finger salute, putting his mask on as he falls off the building, using his webs to go see what it is. Most likely killing the person that causes a panic in the calm city.  

You swear he’s so fucking dumb, but it does make you feel something, you sigh as you shoved your mask on, and following him. 

—

Somehow, he got you bloody, your hero costume was stained red, a dark, dark red, and it wasn’t even yours. After getting blood out of it last time, which took you HOURS to do, you just decided to make another suit. One that would be so much easier to clean. 

His arm wraps around your shoulder. “Come’n darlin’, I didn’t mean to.” 

“Sorry doesn’t mean this suit would be clean in an instant.” You growled softly. After all that work, the hours to make it clean. Just to give up, the material is supposed to be hand cleaned.

“But I like this one now, screams of the damned, losing their life to me and you. That not all heroes are rainbows and sunshine.” 

You dropped your suit onto his couch, sighing. You need to get back to your universe, you have something to get done. You were still mad about the suit, but there was nothing to do. 

Ronin gives another apology before you dashed off, grumpy and wanting to strangle something for the hours you were going to have to put in later.

–

On your bed, there was a red box with a ribbon tied around it. Your room was locked, so there was no way anyone was able to put it there. Slowly, getting over there and pulling the ribbon, what laid inside was your suit. Clean and stitched up. Like the blood was never there, nor the holes. You knew who did this, you left it at his place. The devil does have a bleeding heart.

You hold the suit close, switching into the suit almost immediately and jumping out your window to do your routine patrol. The smile on your face was big enough that it just hurts to hold it for long, but it was so worth it.

— 

You didn’t expect your enemy to just shove some random injection into themselves, making them stronger. You can’t even get a punch in, the enemy was getting faster and faster with his hits. Dodging is all you can do, just trying to make sure you can survive another day. You heard in the distance a familiar sound, but you have to keep focus on the battle, the enemy. Well, until you see that same enemy being flinged into the wall beside you. 

“Heard you need saving, didn’t think the devil had to be the saving grace today.”  

You didn’t even have to guess who it was, you looked over to see Ronin, looking so smugged to save you. He walks to you, shoving his hand out for you to grab and pulls you up. He chuckles as he looks back at the enemy, see him get up. Cracking his knuckles, ready to finish the fight you were just in. 

-

Canon events are in every Spiderman's story, and losing that someone that was close to you… was heartbreak to say the least. You still find their death haunting your dreams, especially around their death anniversary. You couldn’t stand staying in your universe, the photos on your walls stare you down, it felt suffocating. 

Opening that watch, not even seeing where the other side goes, you need somewhere that doesn’t feel like your skin is crawling. Tripping onto something and landing onto something leathery. Taking a moment and looking at what you fell on, it was a couch, a very familiar couch. One that you feel asleep at before. 

You hear a snicker, and lifting your head you see Ronin, dressed in red and black pajamas. “Almost made me have a heart attack Darlin’. Didn’t know you wanted to take out the sinner earlier than his due date.” 

You stared at him, you didn’t think you would go to his universe, nor on his couch. His facial reaction shifted a bit, a smug bastard to something that hid his concern. 

“Move over, hero.” He started shooing at you, making you sit up on his couch. He grabs the remote and turns the tv in his living room on. “Wanna watch some shitty murder movies? Misaki left one of the movies from their time here. I thought it was shit and not enough gore. But she liked it.” 

You nod as you pull your knees to your chest. Taking your response, he puts it on, and the movie, in your opinion, was okayish. Ronin looked half bored throughout the movie, making comments about the killer. “That's way too much blood for that wound.”, “Guts don’t jump out like that.”, even judging how the movie murder was using a weapon wrong. Each comment from him, like he was teaching you about killing, was funny in your opinion. The way he was so judgemental for this murder that did their kills. 

You couldn’t help but snicker at this before laughing. He looked at you like you were the insane one in the room, but you did catch a pleased smile from him. One that was glad your mood had changed, he knew you were always down around this time. 

And if you wake up with a blanket on you, it was the spiderman that belonged into this universe, being ‘a saving grace’ to you.

       𓂋 

˚₊‧꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Angel(Spidergirl)(Spidersaint)(Pinkwidow)

You were at her place as she was changing the design of her suit again. She has to keep up with the fashion world, even as Spidergirl, she has to look her best. You were helping her sketch her newest design. With winter coming, she wants to be able to put a nice coat along with her suit, but also a new skirt design along with it. 

“How about a fluffy coat? One with the spider design with it.” You recommend, flipping your phone to show the coat idea.

She lifted her head and shook it. “That was last season, I can’t look cheezy either.” 

You hummed softly as you looked back into your phone. “What about a jacket, put a wings design on it?” 

“I had one when I was dating Ronin, we were matching. I rather not dig up that old thing.” She crumbled up a sketch and put it next to her. “Plus bring it back won’t be a good look for the fashionable spidergirl.” 

You were now thinking about what was in your closet, an idea popping in your head. “I might have an idea for ya.” 

In about a week, you need a magazine of Angel’s new suit. It had a skirt with a very familiar, matching jacket, with accents that glowed a soft pink that matched her suit. She adored it, along with her fans. Your magazine was autographed with a very personalized message. 

–

“Rest, Angel.” You blocked her window. She had been overworking herself, and easily you can see how tired she was. 

“I can go on patrol, Reader.” She took a side step and you followed her, blocking her path once more. 

“You look like one step away from passing out. And I rather not hear from the news here that, ‘Spidergirl launched into building unconscious.’” You kept your arms crossed, watching her.

“Let me take over your patrol for the night and you can rest. I’ll even pick up our food after I’m done.” 

The both of you were having a stare off, it felt like hours until she sighed. “Fine. You win. I’ll take a rest.”

You sigh in relief as you pull down your mask. “I’ll be back with your favorite comfort meal, then we can do whatever you want.” 

Just about 2 hours later, you arrived back from Angel’s patrol. There was only petty crime, so nothing too much to really worry her back. She was on her couch, doing her skin care routine. 

She lightly chuckles as you put the take out food onto the coffee table, “Go change, then I’ll torture you.” She lifts the face mask package, with the most innocent, sweet smile, but you can tell there was darker intentions with that. But to get her to rest, you'll take the beauty pain. 

–

It was a relaxing day, there wasn’t even any petty crime during this patrol. You were keeping up with Angel, even playing games through this, just keep the patrol entertaining. Landing onto the sidewalk of a barely busy street, you cheer as you win the race. Angel chuckles as she watches you cheer, she is in the new suit that you and her design. Everyone in her universe loved the new suit and decided to make merch of it. Heck, she had to model in clothes dedicated to her suit design. When she told you about the photoshoot, she couldn’t handle her joy from it. 

As you calmed down from your celebration, neither one of you could see the paparazzi coming until it was too late. Each one was asking Angel about her suit and how she came up with the idea. Then asking more personal ones, and somehow, she took each question like a champ. 

“When will you reveal who you are?” One asked, pushing the recorder closer to her masked face. 

“I can’t spill all my secrets, if I do, I won’t keep all my fans' eyes on me.” Her softer voice enchanted with each reporter, making them want to get closer to her, to know more. “I want each one to keep guessing who I am, you’ll never know if I’m your neighbor or your friend, keep guessing my friends.”

She lightly taps your shoulder before webbing up onto a building getting away from the paparazzi, you followed her up, landing next to her as she walked away from the edge of the roof. Away from the cameras and eyes. 

“Didn’t think they would show up, nor ask.. Questions about your life.” You said looking at the direction of the reporters, walking towards her.

“It’s normal, they have been more… extra lately though, the news wants more Spidergirl.” She shrugs, “Though they have been getting into danger just to learn a little bit about me. Last week, I had to drag one out from a battle, they are getting more bold.” She shook her head, sighing as she recalled it.

“Yikes,” You cringed as you also remembered some of your world’s press. But it sounds like Angel got it worse than you.

She sighs again, “I’ll just figure it out, like always.” 

“Well, you got me to help,” You nudged her side with your elbow. “And Ronin, V, and Misaki. We are here to help. You don’t have to be alone for this. We can plan a fake face reveal, pretend it’s some random person. Maybe if we can convince Ronin to do it.” 

She snickers before laughing, you can probably see the image goes through her mind, seeing Ronin taking off her mask to see his face instead of hers. “That would be a sight.”

⚕

V(Spiderman)(Short and simple but also called spiderdog by Ronin)

It was break time for you, no fighting, no work, no nothing. It was a time to rest, and to rest V invited you to hang in his universe. Which you accepted, you wanted to see all those animals he had. Plus it’s been a while since you held Cocoa, his rescue bunny. 

Going through the portal to his bunker, it was dark, so he must still be out. Turning on the lights, and laying on his couch as you wait upon him. Pulling out your phone as you wait for him, shifting through the latest news from your universe. “Spiderman saves children from kidnapping” and “Cops are still trying to arrest Spiderman, but horrible failing at their jobs to protect us.” 

You shook your head as V finally walked in, taking off his mask as he used his other hand to cover his side. You dropped your phone, rushing over to him. “Shit, V!” You gently push his hand to assess the wound. “Go sit, your first aid is the bathroom, right?”

He was shocked at first, seeing you there. “It is.” 

You went to get his first aid, and came out to see him sitting at one of his dining chairs. Grabbing another chair and peeling his hand away from his wound, seeing the damage. “It doesn’t seem too bad, what happened?” 

“One of them had a gun, I didn’t see it in time.” He tries to stay still for you to help patch him up. 

“Ouch, know how that feels.” It was a quick fix, and you put the first aid on the table after patching him up. “Do you feel better now?” 

He grabs the painkillers from his first aid kit as he nods. “I should be fine, we do regenerate faster, so this should heal in a couple days.” 

You let go of a breath that you didn’t even know you were holding. “Alright then.” You got up from your seat, smiling pridefully. “I’ll make us food then, how do you feel about–”

“No.” V interrupted you. “Last time you made food, you and Misaki burnt the cheap instant noodles from that gas station. By forgetting the one thing you need for it. Water.” 

“But-”

“Reader. No. I’ll order take out.” He sighs as he gets up and heads to his bathroom, getting out of his suit.

Well, can’t fight with some free, easy food.

–

It’s the day, the once a month event that you and the other 4 get together. The day you can beat each other up(with some rules because of certain people). Today, it’s you vs V. Angel, Ronin, and Misaki were watching the fight go down. Misaki was loud, cheering you and V on. No one here is in their persona suits, just lose easy fighting clothes. 

He threw the first punch, a swift crouching and aiming for his legs. He took a small jump back. You lift your arms up, ready to either punch or block, instead throwing a kick close to his head. 

It was his turn to crouch. Finally, one of you made contact and it was him, punching you in the stomach, making all the air in your lungs escape you instantly. Your eyes felt like they were watering, blurring your sights for a moment. 

Taking a step back, you took a deep breath in, steeling your body. You kept your eyes on him, watching his movement, taking a big step forward, punching. You throw your fist, blocking it, then using your other fist to make contact on his cheek. You hear him grunt slightly in pain.

The viewers were watching the fight, Misaki was screaming out advice that wasn’t heard by the two fighters. Ronin was enjoying the fight, making comments to Angel. 

Finally, Angel’s alarm hits, soft lyrics blast into the air. Making you and V stop. It’s been five minutes. You were trying to catch your breath, same as V. 

“Good match, you seem to be getting better.” He said, standing straight, lifting his hand out to you to shake. 

You take it and smile. “Thanks, and that was a good match.” 

“Come on, Ronin! Our turn to fight!” Misaki cheered out. Running onto the matted area. 

—

You were staring at your computer, stressed out by some work you were assigned. You let your head hit your desk as you groaned. You swear you feel your brain cells leave you. Lifting your head to look at the ceiling when you heard a knock on your window, looking over to see V in his spiderman suit. 

You felt your lips pull upwards, walking over, and opening the window. You chuckle, “V?”

“Hello, reader. I hope you don’t me dropping by.” You backed up to let the man in. 

“Nah, I needed an excuse to get away from my work. What’s up?” 

He lifted a bag. “You weren’t able to join us for lunch, so I decided to bring you something. This is what you ordered last time.” 

You gently took the bag and opened it. You felt your mouth water from the smell of the food. It was when your stomach growled when you realized you didn’t grab something to eat since you started your work. You looked up at him, feeling the texture of the bag, “Thank you, V.”

“It was no problem to get you this. Eat while it’s hot.” You nod, as you sit back down into your chair, V walks up behind you, seeing what you’re working on. While you were eating, he started helping as much as he could. 

It was a surprise visit, but a very welcomed one.

⋆˚࿔

Misaki(Spiderpop)(Spiderchoas)

“Shit, shit, shit! Reader!” Misaki slides down from the ruble, jumping down where you lay. You felt your body burning, and your back felt like it was being soaked. You couldn’t remember what happened, but you felt like you were run over by a truck, then a train, and they both backed up and crushed you again. 

You groan as you tilt your head to Misaki as they take off their mask. They seemed so scared, but like they were reliving something… but what? 

“You’re gonna be okay, like I’ll call for help. Shit, don’t move. Please, please pick up my fucking call!” You slowly grabbed their shaking hand, your mask was still on, unable to show your emotions, but you still tried and offered comfort. You hear her shiving breath, it shook so bad that it scared you. “Please stay awake, help is going to be here. I promise, I promise on my gear, my suit, hell, everything I own. Just stay awake.”

But everything turned blurry, and you could hear a heartbeat monitor next to you. Turning your head away, you could see Misaki there. She was typing away on their phone, it could be the slaughterhouse group chat. 

“Hey…” It felt like your throat was scratching sandpaper when you spoke. 

Misaki looked at you, and you could see how terrible she looked. Her eyes were red and there were dry tear tracks. “H- holy shit! You’re awake!” They ran to your side, and when you tried to sit up, they assisted. “Thank the gods you are okay, sheesh, like you are okay and awake, and the doctor said you were going to be fine. Like sure, you lost a lot of blood, and they had to do a blood transfusion, but…” 

They paused and their features softened, “You’re okay.”

You held their hand as they rambled, and nodded. “I’m okay.” 

“Good. Now, you are never ever, ever, ever doing that again! I was so scared, hell even Ronin was scared for a moment. Don’t do that to us, we are a squad, we have to stick together, and none of this self sacrificing bullshit you pulled. You do this speech to make sure none of us do that, but you pull it, it’s unfair.” 

“Sorry..” You felt guilty, now you remember why you fell, and how you were injured. Angel was about to get attacked but you pushed her out of the way and took the blow instead. Making you go through buildings, and nearly one collapses on you. If it wasn’t for the spider mutation, you might have died.

“Do you know how scary it was to see you just thrown into buildings? V said if you were a few inches to the side, you might have gotten a pipe in your stomach.”

You rub your thumb on her hand, hearing that, that you scared all four of them, made you feel so guilty for it. But you did save Angel from getting this badly hurt. “I’ll try not to do this again, but no promises. If I can save someone I will take it, Misaki.” 

“But it’s still unfair, also take care of yourself, you need to stay alive, or who else will be my chaos buddy, I need you to help me to annoy everyone.” Their hand shook in yours, the air felt heavy and suffocating. The guilt felt heavy, if this is Misaki's ‘don’t be selfless’ speech, you don’t want to know the others. You think it’ll be too much. 

-

You and Misaki took off your spiderman suits, dressed in casual clothing, walking around in the dimension. Finished up with a mission and both of you had some down time before having to go back to HQ. 

Misaki looked really curious, the spiderman from this world is stuck in another so helping him take down bad guys was needed, so she was wondering what this world is like. Pulling your hand along with them, pointing out options, before deciding to grab some fast food. 

Both of you were on top of a tall building, looking into the blue scenery. “Do you think we can convince V to decorate his suit? Like I like it, but it looks so boring.” 

You snicker as you ate a fry, “You already tried to alter his suit, he was a disco ball for a week. He, literally, was shedding glitter.”

“Hey! Hey! That was just a failed attempt of my glitter fabric, just watch, I’ll put something snake related for him. Him and his love for symbolism.” They yelled at you before taking a bite of her burger. “But he won’t let me within a mile radius of his suit, soooo…” She leans their head on your shoulder.

You luckily groan, “Fii-ine. I’ll help.”

“Knew I could count on my chaos buddy.” Lifting her head to drink her soda. 

“You’re just lucky that you got pretty privilege.” You remarked, as you slightly nudged their shoulder with your fist.

“Damn right!” They yelled out, almost throwing her burger out of their hand. 

–

Misaki took your hand, dragging you through HQ. She was giggling as they did. To keep everyone senses up, V sparked up an idea of hide and seek. Which V wanted to cheer Misaki up, so asked about this game to you so see if it will help them. And from what you can tell with her laughter, they were. 

“Com’n, I got this perfect spot! Ronin won’t find us!” Ronin was seeker this round, and you can expect him to dramatize it. Which, can you expect of him any less? Misaki seemed to be in a higher mood now. 

Finally, they pulled you into her spot, a room that no one remembers, at least you can tell with all the dust in the room. You can hear the soft buzz of her mechanical legs, lifting their body up. “Now we can’t be found.” 

Their smile was infectious, making you smile as well. You were glad that V's plan worked. Misaki webbed your chest, making you almost yelp when they pulled you up with them. Now hiding with the open rafters. 

Misaki was kicking her legs as they watched the door. “I didn’t expect this to be so fun.” You felt your head nod in agreement. “And I didn’t think V and Ronin would try and find each other first. Poor Angel is gonna have to deal with them, because there is no way they will find us here.”

You laugh as you think of them bickering. “We can apologize to Angel once we get found, the poor girl is going to have a headache dealing with them.” 

“Angel our beloved, so sorry for making you deal with this.” They said, as they put their hands together, like they were praying. 

You rolled your eyes as you looked at the door, and no signs of them. Misaki seemed to be back to herself again, glad, that V had a great plan to help them.

It was about 30 minutes until V found the both of you, which he was very lucky to see in the room and look up. Seeing both of your shit-eating, win smiles. And if Misaki ran ahead, to see a glimpse of V’s smile, one to see he was happy to see his friend was back to themselves, it was your secret. 

–

Together(somewhat) Headcanons

Misaki has mechanical parts in her suit, shaped like spider legs. A part they like doing is using them to get taller than the others and T pose, showing off dominance towards the others.

Surprised hangouts and sleepovers are usual, so just jumping into another's dimension to see the others is practical. 

Each one has a nickname/code names because calling out spiderman won’t be confusing, though V just sticks to being called spiderman.(Each nickname/code name is next to their name)

Games and sparing always happens in Spiderman HQ, and anything with fighting will always be settled on the mats

Because Misaki glitterify his suit once, V has started keeping it close to him or locking it up and hiding it. 

-

Can’t think of other hcs at the moment and I'm going to bed, hope you enjoyed it! And sorry if some parts seem less motivational, I want to get birthday content for myself done.

[bubbarnes]

God forbid Seb should be a rational individual and say, “yeah, I don’t agree with this or even like him, but he’s still human.” The pearl clutching and the calls for him to loudly and obnoxiously say how much he hates him are exactly what he’s addressing. We, as a society, need to grow the fuck up. You can dislike or disagree with someone without being immature and irrational when speaking about him. I’ve never liked Trump but the constant temper tantrums from people who hate him are downright embarrassing. Really? He just lives rent free in your brain, huh?

It’s also deeply amusing to see how triggered people were by saying “we all have a little Trump in us” because WOW did some people prove him right with their responses. I saw some Trump-level tantrums. I’ll give you an example of how Seb’s observation applies to me: I’m stubborn as hell. I’m also very driven and have trouble accepting defeat. There’s the Trump in me. Doesn’t mean I like him, doesn’t mean I’m evil, doesn’t mean I hate women. I acknowledge that I am not perfect. Some people in this fandom should really try it.

Good on Seb for being the first person who, despite openly disliking Trump, has the class and intelligence to speak about him like a grown adult. There are people in much higher positions than him (and much lower positions) who should learn to do the same.

this is... good god, babe, i wish i had a good mind at this point and that my english wasn't that broken so i could express my feelings towards this whole thing.

just, your mind? like, we very much have the same thoughts. people want to blame him so badly, 1) for taking this role? when he has been saying for yearsss and even more recently that he loves taking roles that are challenging, kinda fucked up and more and 2) they want him to trash talk about him so bad it's insane, the man it's doing his job, like it's not the same when i hate my job and tell people around, you know? and it's even worse when we know the boogeyman have some fucking weird and maniac people following him.

sometimes I feel like just because I am a fan, I am always so "wow" with everything Sebas says but the way he puts his ideas out there? his mind? like, you can see when he has so many ideas running through his head, kinda makes him stutter and he just chuckles but continues and it makes me kinda sad when he wants to keep the conversation going but some people is like "okay so, whatever, next question" and i don't see his fandom talking about those things either.

and yes, he very much hates the boogeyman but i like when he is like "yes, he's so fucked up and if he used that mind for something actually good, would be amazing. but whatever". makes me think that people feel like if he doesn't talk about him, it's because he admires and praise him? which is absurd, i guess.

[gwaaaaar]

Making Some Goddamn Sense Out of Team 3

EDITED for Ganji's official letter. I deleted this because erm. Didn't want someone to get on my ass. But yeah reuploaded :3 and information updated to avoid misinfo.

Spoilers for Ganji Birthday Letter ahead under the cut. I have been wracking my brain for days thinking about this goddamn letter. Thinking about gannieaesvic’s group in general. For the past 4 years I’ve been collecting information. Here is what I have gathered based on facts from the letters. For speculation, I will be stating what is my personal speculation and dear reader it will be up to you whether or not you think it has basis in canon. 😭 I’m still kind of heartbroken over what transpired… (brown people never win oml) (AND BIPOLAR PEOPLE TOO) but I will try to keep my personal feelings out of my fact-compiling. At the end though I will be discussing some personal thoughts!

ALSO… yeah so. TW for self-harm and racism/ableism. The first is going to be mentioned quite a bit because of someone, if those depictions upset you this is your warning.

To get this out of the way: Ganji self-harms when in a manic state. In his 2023 letter when he was in the detention center, everytime he was triggered by bright lights he would hold his head and bang his head against the wall or try to snatch the candles. LEADING INTO SPECULATION ZONE!!! Apparently according to who wrote that letter, he has a scar on his forehead which may imply that this is a very very frequent event. Hold onto this idea for a bit.

With that piece of background information out of the way, onto the actual match lore:

Aesop's 2021 letter takes place on the fifth day. He states “everyone is finally here” which is strange as fuck because he was the last to arrive on day 2. The way he says it implies that there are more people than him, Ganji, Annie and Victor. So let's rely on Annie’s letter instead.

On Annie’s first day, Victor arrives first, then Ganji. Although for Ganji she says “he was unlike any other before him” which honestly makes it sound like there were more people before Victor… but let's ignore that for now.

On her first day, she gets scared of Ganji and runs to her room, but when she listens in to his room, she hears thumping noises that grow in excitement, and when she knocks she notices hesitation and caution, which makes her think Ganji is like her.

So apparently the noise coming from his room is from him practicing to relieve anxiety! In his backstory it's mentioned that his neighbors heard loud noises from his room so that confirms what he must've been doing back then.

Ganji at that point had escaped the detention center where he had been locked in a dark room and practically dehumanized by a white man yet again, so yeah I think he’s reasonably pissed. If it weren’t for the events that transpired before the match I would almost say his rough attitude is out of character because Ganji’s own neighbors describe him as “soft-spoken” even though they were scared of him.

Moving on: on Annie’s second day, Aesop arrives. During dinner she hears mysterious footsteps and mentions that that was the second time “she saw him”. If she meant Aesop, wow what a terrible way to portray that like. The way she describes dinner, you would assume everyone’s there. She said everyone was seated during dinner and Victor was on a sofa. Idfk who else would be making those footsteps and looking at her weird because everyone’s already there and she’s seen them like more than twice probably in those two days.

Heading into the speculation zone: I do wonder, could there possibly be a fifth member? There is no mention of a hunter in this match at all. The repeated usage of words that make it sound like there are more people in Aesop and Annie’s personal letters even though there are none is so incredibly strange. I’m sure it’s a wonky translation but like. Come on.

Back to the mainline. So. In Victor's 2021 letter he mentions “But then I remembered the rule that we should not talk to each other, so I gathered the courage to open the door.” We can actually maybe pin down which day this rule was introduced.

In Aesop’s 2021 letter he states the game will start in 3 days. A match is usually 8 days (at least Emma’s was from 6-13, so 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13) so we can date Aesop's letter from the fifth day. He mentions that he finally settled on Victor as a target and will send his “first letter tomorrow” so the sixth day. Circle back to Victor’s 2021 letter and he mentions Aesop has sent him a third letter. So on days 6, 7, 8, after dinner, Victor has received letters. And Victor mentions their match will be tonight and they’ve already had dinner, dating that letter to the final day. SO we can try to more or less safely assume that around the fifth day, this rule was implemented.

Speculation zone again: if I had to guess why, I think it was implemented after Ganji was released from his dark room so it would be harder for him to figure out who wrote him that note, and if they actually wrote what was written.

Back to the facts. So we have descriptions of days 1, 2, 5, 8. We need to find out when and what happened in the other 5 days.

OK I lied, maybe we aren’t out of the speculation zone. I’m gonna go out on a limb and say on days 3-4, Ganji had his incident where Annie accidentally triggers him, presumably using a lantern while she was out and about because their encounter happens at night. Now the thing is, she was drugged, and that’s why she started being more active at night. Ganji was already kind of a night owl because of his mania. We can deduce that around Days 2-3, she was starting to get drugged. And since her reactions triggered Ganji’s own before he got the “supplies”' which seem to be mood stabilizers judging from their later scuffle, I’m gonna assume he was getting drugged with anxiety drugs after day 4.

Victor mentions on day 8 (2021 birthday letter) that for the first time ever his door was knocked, not the others knocking their own door to get his attention. And the loudness of it was from Ganji. Before that, at 10 in the morning Annie gave him a letter, and then later he got a letter from Aesop. Victor has never gotten a letter from Ganji and the fact Ganji knocks on his door instead is unusual. It could indicate Ganji doesn't know how the system works. Hold that thought for a speculation later.

“Written notes are the perfect form of proof to sow discord and expose secrets, and they acted as an effective catalyst for the development of the experiment’s middle and late stages.” This was in Victor’s case file. I’m assuming Days 1-3 is the early stage, day 4-6 is middle, and day 7-8 is late. If I am correct, this may fall in line with my theory that on Day 5, the letters system was implemented by the experimenters.

It is mentioned that Annie tried telling Aesop and Victor she was uncomfortable by Ganji but they just didn’t care. So what the hell was the reason behind them forcibly holding Ganji down and throwing him in a dark room??? Did they know that bright lights triggered him??? Did they think he was gonna hurt them? Because at most, Ganji would’ve been holding his head in his hands and hitting it against a wall and screaming or trying to snatch the light source Annie was using… Did they put him in a dark room for his own protection??? Like at least Aesop would want his corpses to be intact and undamaged but like why does Victor gaf??? He isn’t the most compassionate. LIKE VICTOR??? HE GOT UP HIS ASS AND ACTUALLY TOOK ACTION??? It’s just. Strange to me.

No fucking wonder Ganji was pissed holyyyy shittttt. White man after white man locking him in dark rooms.

Keep note of Annie’s expression of discomfort because I will be touching on this later.

So I’m assuming Ganji would've been released from confinement on the fifth day or so after receiving the note. And that’s when the notes system was implemented, he could’ve been confused as to what to do especially since no one was verbally talking to each other. So he could have observed the system they had and tried following it to send Annie a message back. This is all speculation again, just the best way I can piece the timeline together.

So after Victor’s 2021 letter, they meet up and Annie tries triggering him BUT he takes his mood stabilizers!!! Yippee!!! And he’s like, nice try bitch, they get in a fight but the lantern gets toppled over by Annie by accident. Annie escapes with her catapult which is. Strange like actually where the fuck did they meet up how does she have enough space to place that and use it… whatever anyways she escapes, Ganji’s stuck in the fire and tries finding an escape route, he sees Victor, Aesop and Annie together and gets pissed when Victor goes back in the fire. Annie tries to get the situation under control but Aesop just decides to kill Ganji with her before killing her himself.

MINOR inconsistency with Aesop’s case file, where it is mentioned that after the “prey” (Victor) goes missing, Ganji gets violent. “It wasn’t until the prey went missing that No. 3-1-4 lost their cool and became extremely violent, and the plan was interrupted, forcing No. 3-?-1 to show his inner personality.”

“Once the prey was lost, No. 3-?-1 was triggered to eliminate No. 3-1-4, who interrupted his plan, and to make it his goal to eliminate No. 3-1-2.” Two things: again what is WITH THIS FUCKING WORDING. Before Victor’s case file, it legit sounded like the prey was someone else. The only reason we know it’s Victor is because the circumstances line up. Besides that, How did Ganji interrupt his plan to embalm Victor? AND the most damning inconsistency of all, when they say Victor goes missing, it makes it sound like Ganji thinks Aesop did something to Victor and that’s why he gets violent . WHICH IS PECULIAR BECAUSE the group reunites at one point and that’s when Victor goes back into the fire for his letters like that is written in Ganji’s letter. Why would that make Ganji violent??? Why would a literal suicide attempt trigger him??? Strange as fuck get it together idv.

I also wonder, why was Annie crying while killing Ganji? Did she feel remorseful? Did the drugs finally wear off? Did she realize Aesop would kill her next?

AND WHY DOES AESOP KILL HIMSELF??? I THOUGHT HE WANTED TO KILL AS MANY PEOPLE AS POSSIBLE… AND THEN HE'S LIKE I killed 2 people, that’s enough.

This writing is stupid as Hell.

Deranged ranting aside now… OVER IT 💅💅💅. Speculating time!!! And my personal thoughts later on. All the important facts are outta the way.

So, what were in the contents of the letter Annie sent to Victor, and the letter Ganji gives to Victor. Victor never states that he delivered those letters, he just keeps them. So for Annie maybe it can be assumed it’s for him, but for Ganji, Victor thinks it might be for Annie. Considering this was on the last day, just mere HOURS before their match, legitimately he may have forgotten to deliver them??? Were those possibly the letters he killed himself for? I wonder what could possibly be in them that he thinks these secrets are worth keeping to the very end??? Or was he just so obsessed with letters the contents don’t even matter??? For Annie, I think she might have been trying to recruit Victor and Aesop’s help one last time. And for Ganji, I think he might have been trying to send a message back to her in response to something. Well whatever it is ig we will never know.

ALSO they mention that they have been sending Ganji supplies and sending false notes to the subjects of the group. Perhaps that may be why Ganji was sending Annie a letter as a response. And hey maybe Annie was in fact sending letters to Ganji because she thinks he was sending her letters. But Victor’s a letter freak and has been reading the notes. He might know which ones are in response to fake notes and maybe that’s why he hasn’t been delivering some??? I don’t know… just a theory.

I also wonder when Annie decides to tell Victor and Aesop about her concern. Was it after Ganji snapped at her? Before? ALSO. In the physical fight. I’m surprised she could resist. Ganji is a professional cricket player, he could easily knock her out with his bat or something. He wants to eliminate her/whoever sent him the note. He is the soberest he’s ever been. But he doesn’t do it immediately? It’s almost as if he went easy on her or maybe didn’t wanna kill her… kind of like… Norton… in Da Capo… with Orpheus…

Something that confuses me, so so much: why would Annie try triggering Ganji??? I’ve seen a few people theorize she was trying to get his help that way but that is such a fucked up way to do so??? She would’ve benefitted in no way out of it.

Let’s say she thinks Ganji would’ve hurt her in his manic state (BOOOO whatever man), why would she try triggering him into a state she thinks will hurt her?

Let’s say she thinks Ganji would’ve hurt her in his manic state *at first* until she sees that he in fact only hurts himself. IF SHE TRIGGERS HIM, KNOWING HE WOULD DO SO, that is incredibly fucked up. He can’t help her if he is hurt!!! He can’t help her if he’s having a breakdown!!! It reads so incredibly sadistic and dehumanizing she doesn’t look good either way.

Although Ganji's 2024 letter in english removed the accent part for Annie (thank the lord), in Aesop's personal letter he calls Ganji a cranky man with a strange accent… which is… hrm… if they hadn't removed the accent part, there would've been a lot more merit to it because of what was in Aesop’s letter.

However in Chinese... the accent thing is still in there. Take that as you will.

Also we must consider the fact that Annie is drugged. Her decision-making may not be rational. She wants to protect herself BUT but God. The decision to meet with Ganji and try triggering him still doesn’t make sense, drugged or not it is incredibly stupid. Why doesn’t she try staying away from someone she’s afraid of??? Like objectively it’s just stupid.

Then the fact Victor comes in to detain Ganji??? No seriously, why does he care? Does he care for Ganji’s safety? His own?? Because if it was his own he could just lock himself in his room. I know he was a part of a criminal gang so maybe it’s normal to him, but there was no indication beforehand that he would ever be active like this.

ALSO… why does Victor go to the manor? In his trailer he goes because he receives his own letter. Did he want a friend or??? I know storytelling will always be about introducing new elements but I’ve never quite moved on from Victor quite literally having empathy as an ingame trait only for his letter to be like he can only empathize with small objects and animals. Did his policeman friend mean anything to him? Legitimate question. For now I theorize that he used to be more empathetic but the trauma from that incident made him desperately try to close off his emotions from people. But yeah I just don’t think I can get a read on him anymore so I won’t try… I’m a Ganji truther first before I used to be a Victor stan. He’s a blorbeen…

Regardless of if any of the other three are racist or not, this letter was tasteless, Ganjis previous letters have all taken agency away from him. I understand it’s to show the circumstances of his time and to reveal information, but why couldn’t he or his loved ones reveal said information? Why did it always have to be people that think so little of him? He’s described as kind so many times and then they brutalize him so much for things he can’t control (his race or his mental disorder). It’s really disgusting and it feels like shock value. They rarely explore how it makes him feel in his own words, only observing what he feels from the outside. You see that he is hurting, that he is screaming. But you don’t get to hear him say how he feels, why he feels that way. You don’t get to hear his homesickness, how much he misses his family, his friends, only that his homesickness drives him to extreme actions. It feels like they are saying “look at this kind broken man get broken even further! Isn’t this just so sad!” It is sad but they are doing this in the wrong way. There are much more tasteful, nuanced ways to explore topics like these.

I think that’s all I have to say, collection of facts and my own thoughts aside. Please let me know what you guys think.

[offbranddrpepsi]

Saw your headcannons about reader having mommy issues can you do a daddy one with Cypher and Chamber

fuck yeah

Is a dad but by far not a typical dad, acts more like a goofy uncle or teasing older brother so its real weird when someone sees him as a dad

initially thinks you're joking just to get a rise out of him and jokes back

once he learns he is dead ass the biggest fucking ass.

Teases you any chance he gets, be that just in a "oh do you need a dad for that?" to "I guess you can say you needed Daddys help". its endless, he finds it fucking hilarious

if it extended into a NSFw way then he would a be kinda meh about it? would feel a little weird given he has a kid that still calls him dad/daddy but also kinda like Viper and has a thing for power so

Chamber is the image of respectable and is VERY sincere when you tell him of you daddy issues.

Ask a zillion questions to see firstly why you trust him of all people to tell as well as map out boundaries, triggers, etc

Once he knows it hardly ever comes up

when people call Brim or Cypher dad, or talk about family around you, he has an ear and eye out in case you get uncomfortable so he can interrupt

Makes a point to take you out on a date or have a date in for fathers day

Asks you about your mother, grandparents, any family you are close to and talks about them instead

If you slipped up and called him dad he would be taken aback for a moment but not make it very obvious, continuing on as if you hadn't said it

[carlyraejepsans]

i lowkey disagree w u on ur position on fictional ships and certain portrayals of topics such as incest and pedophilia, but oh my fucking god to have the fucking. AUDACITY to accuse someone of real life pedophila and incest because they MENTIONED being NEUTRAL on a certain topic?? like you didnt even say you think fictional incest is cool and rad or wtvr u afaik (which. even if u did that ask would Still be abhorrent) but ur explicitly Neutral and are VERY carful to tag shit and i just. 1/2

cut for length and also sensitive topics

i cannot fucking imagine accusing someone of such a horrid act with such conviction bc u SLightly DIsagree on a topic. jfc. i block tags and if ur conversations ever drive me over the edge id Unfollow. im so so sorry people are such fucking assholes man. i hope people gain some sense abt these topics im so sorry

yeah no i completely respect your opinion. and i do know where it's coming from. to tell you the truth (basic decency of tagging triggers aside), i DO find most of those fanon portrayals to be cheap and uncalled for a good majority of the time, at least from a literary standpoint. things like dating a minor or your own sibling have serious implications on a character's moral code and interpersonal dynamics where most characters would... not fucking do that! and the moment you don't engage with those implications, it becomes either incredibly ooc or altogether shallow. some people act like a topic being problematic makes it inherently complex and rich, when it can be as tropey and flat as any other "safe" topic. being problematic doesn't make you interesting etc. my point isn't arguing over literary value, it's more like... there's people behaving horribly and cruelly towards the AUTHORS, and making disgusting assumptions like the one that was made against me, all because of fiction you can always filter out at the end of the day (assuming basic tagging etiquette is respected ofc) and like. that's too far. nobody deserves to be treated like this.

not to mention, the "incest fiction recs"/"pro incest posts" those freaks mentioned were literally 1) me gushing about revolutionary girl utena, a deeply feminist and self-aware series that unpacks the misogyny behind anime incest tropes by treating that abuse REALISTICALLY as patriarchal manipulation from a male relative and showing how the female victim suffers and emancipates herself from it and 2) me being annoyed that hs showed one of its characters suffering from csa without acknowledging it AS abuse, even when it would've been not just the morally decent thing to do, but also a genuinely good addition to his character arc (apparently it does do that in the endstory, but i didn't know it at the time). those are both posts about realistic, condemning, and well-thought depictions of incestuous abuse in fiction—which is the only way i ever enjoy the topic btw—but that didn't stop these people from deciding i had an incest fetish and harassing me for weeks on end to the point of accusing me of sexually abusing my teenage brother. like you said, it would be a ghoulish way to treat someone even if their assumption had been right (and it wasn't), but it's like they saw the topic being mentioned and that fact alone was unforgivable, regardless of context. and this crap happens to people all the time! if that's not fucking stupid i don't know what is

[liquidstar]

Okay so like I know little about ReZero (would love to watch it one day but, the content warnings) BUT I love people talking about things they like so. Assuming this isnt already a plot point, who in your opinion would be the FUNNIEST character to also be aware of/remember the time loops (Subaru in this case does NOT know they are in on it lol). If this is already a plot point please tell me about a neat bird or something you saw recently instead, thank you :)

THATS SO SWEEET THANK YOU <3 I ENJOY IT TOO SO IF YOU EVER WANNA INFODUMP ABT STUFF MY INBOX IS OPEN ^_^

ANYWAY. UNFORTUNATELY THIS IS A PLOTPOINT AND ITS NOT FUNNY </3

in the 4th arc subaru meets this witch lady, echdina, who kinda exists in a dreamworld, hard to explain, but shes aware of his timeloops. she implies that shes aware but tries to get him to say it himself. which he does so veeerrry hesitantly because he cant tell anyone Or Else. but after he realizes he can say it here, he has like, a total breakdown and keeps repeating his confession over and over again because he can finally tell someone about all this pain and suffering. and its an incredibly cathartic scene buuuuut she is very much manipulating him.

another character is vaguely aware of the loops but doesnt experience them/cant see them. that character is roswaal who is actually his boss. and the guy who has literally been PERSONALLY causing every single fucking issue hes had so far because some book told him to. and when things start going wrong he starts to, like, kick the shit out of subaru to try and get him to restart. yeah bosses are like that sometimes idk. everyone takes turns punching him at the end of this arc so its fine.

personally though if i had to pick a character whod be aware of the loops... id actually go with otto despite Everything. because i think hes the most likely to come out of the experience of watching his friend die horribly and come up with a plan, while also genuinely having subaru's best interest at heart. he doesnt care about anyone elses best interest tho, he was willing to let an entire country die for this guy. hes willing to kill the child he just adopted. so i think otto being aware would cause some fucking situations, especially if theyre not working together for a solution. i also think itd be funny if hes like "if we get gay in the timeloop no one has to know. ill just play dumb."

SO YEAH hes my pick for funniest one. all that being said im pretty sure i wrote up an episode by episode trigger guide if youre ever interested, i might have to touch it up tho. BUT if youre not interested theres never any pressure, this ask is already so sweet tysm again <3

[iantimony]

tuesday line go up (derogatory)

hello from the end of my workday. writing this on my office computer as i watch my simulation crash in real time in the background. convergence line go up :(

listening: astonishing legends the body on the moor part 1, for some reason astonishing legends is such good Cleaning And Organizing noise to my brain. i've raised my eyebrow at some of their conclusions sometimes but i love a good unsolved mystery that doesn't focus on true crime what i can say

more 00s, just whatever shit the spotify algorithm spits out basically..."hard and heavy headbanging tuesday afternoon". i think for brevity i am going to focus on posting only the things that stuck out to me or are ear worms at the moment, which for this week is miss murder by afi, the kill by 30 seconds to mars, and out of control by hoobastank, especially the line in the latter after the chorus that goes 'and i may never know the answer to this endless mystery' that for some reason tickles my brain.

reading: Bring Back Those Pumped Italian Sodas (Anna Hezel): i LOVE italian sodas. the candy shop on main street near me does italian sodas and it is my favorite little treat to do a hot girl walk downtown and get a little bevvy to come with me. they whip so hard. bring them back everywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!

elitism is the enemy of the people (Mina Le) and the linked The machine in the garden. (Emily Sundberg) ... discourse(tm) about What Substack Is For, which means nothing to me as a non-substack user. i use a rss reader to follow a few specific substacks but i do not use the platform even a little bit. sundberg seems to disparage the list format (shoutout to miss deb perelmen who i saw in there as an example of things that are pushed on the platform now) (deb's newsletter is one of the ones i follow with my rss feed lol) slash the concept of "list of content I’m consuming" which. looks at my weekly roundup posts. lol. i do understand to an extent, though - does my weekly roundup post make me a Writer(tm)?? i would kinda agree that no not really.

this zine that i think i reblogged yesterday is very cute.

watching: i saw the new alien movie with a friend! it was really good, i enjoyed it, i did look up the jumpscares beforehand because i do not do well with those in theaters especially the big imax ones, but it ended up not being necessary - the local theater here has no imax or any of the big surround sound gimmick things, which i actually prefer, and it also means the tickets were dirt cheap. 10/10 experience. the movie itself was fun, the correct amount of peen/vag imagery that one would expect from an alien movie. important to note that the dehumanization of an android character (who is also the only black character and strongly autism coded) is a big plot thing, it is not Good that he is treated that way and that is also a plot thing but it is important to know going in so it's not a surprise (thanks to someone in a server i'm in for pointing that out, i didn't clock it as being potentially triggering when i saw it but i was like ohh yeah that does make sense to warn people about). really good cast and plot overall, there was only like one point where i was like "whyyy nooo that makes no sense, why would you do that" (without too much spoiling, the gravity turns on and off in a portion and they were just. zooming up an elevator shaft using the lack of gravity. like why would you not be staying near the ladder. you KNOW it's going to turn off at some random point. anyways), but in general the decisions the characters made were really reasonable which made it very fun to watch the consequences of like, yeah, that is also the choice i would have made, shit. the ending made me go EUGH!! in a good way. lots of good easter eggs that i probably missed some of. made me weirdly nostalgic for my dad because when i was growing up he had a life-size hyper-realistic rubber facehugger model. he used to mime getting attacked by it. my mom hated that fucking thing. it must have gotten thrown out or given away at some point. anyways, as the kids would say: it's kino

thank u celestialtourguide for ur dropout login xoxo, i have been watching a lot of 'make some noise'. i love how sometimes you can hear the crew laughing in the background.

youtubesphere:

jimmy robins: The Fallout of Watcher's Betrayal, what sparked me looking more at dropout. also found out from the comments section that sam reich is son of robert reich ??? wild

finished the george r r martin problem. basically: yeagh

dangelo wallace: not gonna link em all but his videos on chapell roan, katy perry, blake lively, and starbucks. pop culture updates that mean nothing to me. good background noise tho

mina le: underconsumption-core, travel outfits, and Paul Mescal’s shorts, the luxury of privacy & the celebrity vs. influencer paradox. my boyfriend is a proponent of the tiny inseam shorts and i wholly encourage it. more of that, please, from everyone.

made in the moment: My Crafty Boston Apartment Tour. as someone who is also just moved into my own apartment alone for the first time and is in the process of making the space feel like mine, this hits interestingly.

playing: dnd as normal. i finally got to go mask-off, was replaced by a doppleganger like six months ago and finally got to pop off and kill some guys and beat the shit out of my friends lol >:b i have also moved the game that i run to biweekly instead of weekly. i just have too much fucking things happening and dm burnout real.

making: evil eye coasters! these made me very nervous because of how streaky the underglaze is! so i did the tedious task of re-coloring in around my sgraffito lines of my [redacted] coasters. clear coated them and crossing my fingers. these coasters are also too thin, two of them are too warped to use as coasters so ill have to figure out what to do with them. maybe drilling a hole (carefully...) so i can hang them up somewhere? the [redacted] coasters are like twice the thickness so i don't think they'll be warped as bad thankfully.

i also. made. mesopotamian foot bowl :) i did not have a reference image at the time because that happened to be when the t mobile towers went down for a few hours last saturday so i kinda just freeballed it but he looks. so silly i love him. i think im gonna have to modify him, i was chatting with the studio owner about it and she was like "if you threw that bowl on a wheel you should hollow the legs out, wheel pottery twists slightly as it dries and that plus the drying rates being different will make them just pop right off", which, i can always glue them back on! but i should give him the best odds possible. bonus lil tushy

i made a BIG BOWL !! it's not really clear from the image but it's the most clay i've ever thrown at once, i think it's like. 2.5 lb?? i didn't actually weigh it first oops i should weigh it. but it's like a foot across at the top. i put it on little ball feet to use as some sort of display bowl i think.

and there's one more bowl that is really unremarkable so no picture for now.

fiber art: made a fucking. magic the gathering card cozy for a friend that my local mtg group is putting together a care package for. it's so fucking stupid i love it. not gonna post a pic of the front, it's just a dark red border to hold the card in. i might outline the swamp symbol with matching embroidery floss (or maybe navy??) to make it pop more, might also sew a small square of fabric on the inside to hide the loose ends. colors were chosen to match his main commander which is braids

eating: FINALLY finished the gyudon. um . didn't cook many more recipes. i was going to do one pot chicken meatballs with greens and deb smittenkitchen's corn bacon and parmesan pasta last night but i spent two hours wandering walmart like my ancestors wandered the desert and came home and just had leftovers lol. the cooking will commence......today after i post this and go home.

misc: the midwest is hot this week! fml! on the plus side i don't think my average energy bill in my new place will be worse than my old one despite the worse insulation based on the mid-cycle energy report email i got, on the minus side now i am not splitting that cost so technically it feels more expensive :( thankfully i have finally been finishing the process of closing my dad's accounts so i will have a little padding in my bank account, plus i think i am supposed to get the fellowship i won deposited soon?? shrug. i booked some flights using credit card points that in retrospect i should have booked with Money because of that fellowship but oh well. i am still in the Everything Is So Expensive stage of moving as i finish getting furniture and miscellaneous home goods, hence the two hour walmart wander yesterday. i still need a couch. i think i am getting a frat house walmart futon for like $150 just because it's space efficient and won't break the bank and will be easy to sell when i move out. i should probably order that before i go visit home for 3 weeks ...... anyways. that's this tuesdaypost done and dusted.

[polycharismas]

my monthly alien stage rewatch findings. or rambles. Yeah rambles. i didnt say anything about Black Sorrow or Cure because those are like the most analyzed videos of all time and im tired Sigh

My Clematis: It still amazes me how much of an effect this one still has on me after all the time that has passed and after all the things that have happened in Alien Stage by now. It truly represents every single thing that makes Alien Stage such a special story. I think watching it again after all that went on in the story just elevates it so much more. This time around what did it for me was the monologue because you can easily apply it to every other character in this and it just Fits so well. Because truly what else do these children have aside from one another? Who else are they supposed to believe in? Where else are they supposed to find a God that can keep them moving forward in a world as cruel as this? All of them have someone, the nature of their admiration and the way they express it varies so much between all of them, but it still follows the same principle after all. The whole mv just put it in such a beautiful way it honestly holds up as its own story but knowing there was way more to these two girls and this whole world makes it so much better. I love yuri

ALIEN STAGE: UUugggGGahsgagahHahwnajwjdj Sorry. Okay. This is like the actual real trailer for this thang and its also so perfect. It foreshadows everyone's role surprisingly well. I think the fact Sua is the one singing also makes it better somehow because it just makes sense. She's the one that indirectly triggered a lot of what happens in Alien Stage in the first place she's the most important for our protagonist she's related with the rest of the cast in many different ways and to this day we still know next to nothing about her and yet she's the one singing the song that can be considered a true introduction to this whole world and that's Fascinating to me. I just feel nostalgic about this one also even if it really hasn't been that long since it was released. General banger and also it looks pretty as hell it makes me ill. Waugh

Unknown (Till the end...): OKAY I REALIZED THIS WAS PROBABLY THE ONE WHERE MY OPINIONS WOULD CHANGE THE MOST i have recently taken quite a liking to thinking about Till since a Twitter thread changed my whole perception about him and Oh Boy Did It All Change. It kind of really fucks me up. Till's relationship with Mizi i mean. It's stated he's one of the most brilliant in Anakt Garden. Not only is he skilled at both singing and playing an instrument he's also a pretty damn good composer. It's really something when you realize Mizi was the one who gave him both the determination and the inspiration to achieve all of this. The song he performed was the fastest selling album and he made it to Top 2 despite the fact the aliens are just not fond of him at all to put lightly. And he only achieved all of this because Mizi decided to show him a kindness she has always been familiar with but also a kindness he never experienced once in his life. Till has suffered a lot. Struggling to find an alien that would actually want to adopt him, being experimented on by the aliens and probably way Wayyyyy more, but it only took a single person to show him kindness for him to be able to keep on living. The nature of his feelings can be easily interpreted as romantic but it honestly resembles more that of a painter and his muse to me. So how do you think he felt when he saw his muse experience for the very first time the unkind world they lived in? He couldn't even glance at her during his performance because seeing his idol in such a state was painful. That still didn't stop him from wanting to speak his heart out through a song specifically made for her to hear. I sure hope nothing bad happens to this determined and energetic little guy!

Ruler of My Heart: Hi. This time around i thought really hard about how naturally Luka could hit all of Mizi's weak points through his performance. It's like a skill he learned throughout the years which is a really disturbing idea for me because we all know the state of his mind but what else could this be than giving the aliens exactly what they want from hosting this competition through all these years? Luka's parallels with Hyuna in the way they went about their roles in this world always fascinated me greatly because on one hand we have a total rebel who didn't hesitate to escape and do what She thinks is correct and on the other we have the Perfect contestant for Alien Stage. A title that sounds prestigious but can be also terrifying if we look at it from a human perspective. Someone so capable of twisting people's minds for the sake of entertainment and someone just detached enough to not hesitate at the truly awful implications of being a part of this competition and still participate with everything he's got. We don't know what exactly is the reason he did all of this and we also don't know much about. Anything that goes through his mind. So what the hell am i even talking about honestly. I want him so badly its painful i can fix him❤️

TOP 3: guys Guys Guys Guys Guys Guys Guys. Here it is. Famously known video i never shut the fuck up about. I think dropping this not before Alien Stage started but in the middle of it was genius because now we know exactly what the nature of this world truly is. I will never shut the fuck up about how absolutely amazing this video specifically is. The shift between the perspective of Alien Stage the aliens have to the perspective the humans themselves have is so fucking well done it makes me insane everytime. What could Alien Stage be to beings incapable of feelings? Just the perfect source of entertainment and money they could ask for. Its nothing more than that. But to the humans themselves its absolutely everything. Where they could win everything or lose it all. In this world humans have no other option than to trust their abilities to have even the slightest chance of being given the right to live freely. Where the cost of losing is your life. But also where the cost of winning is your own humanity. This video represents all of that in such a perfect way and it makes me ill in the head. GHhagzgHagGagagagav im normal

MIZISUA: Having a dedicated video for the most important relationship in the whole series is actually such a brain move. You can always feel the love these two have for each other every time they are together but the way you can feel it here just hits. Not a single word is spoken and yet you can feel everything they felt for each other in just that peaceful moment they shared when they were being sent to Anakt Garden. And the way you can also feel the pain Sua's absence has on Mizi in the span of so little time. You can feel absolutely everything with just that final scene alone. You can also see how opposite they were to each other and yet how well they fit together despite that. Seeing Sua like this makes me feel ill because i know already how much Mizi's everything changed her completely. To be loved is to be changed indeed. This video says everything you need to know about their feelings for each other and im DIGGING IT man. I miss them so much it hurts

All-in: HEH. HEY. HI HYUNA. This is like the perfect way to introduce her. We already know Hyuna somehow managed to break into the competition itself to save Mizi and this video just enhances more the way we see her by showing us how strong she is both as leader of the resistance and as a person. Hyuna is by far the most mature of the cast and this video shows it in such a perfect way. Someone like her is exactly what Mizi needed to finally break away from the pain Alien Stage caused her and to search for a path of her own in the freedom she now has. I love how easy going and fun the whole song feels because its no longer a performance for the aliens its a performance for the humans. Its no longer a song trapped beneath all that surrounds Alien Stage. Its a song made for the people that are free from the aliens that's meant to inspire them to keep moving forward and to not stop fighting for the future where the humans hold freedom. All of this also makes the fact that Luka is such a huge trigger for her elevate both of their characters greatly and also just make the whole conflict between them more interesting. What exactly was it that made Hyuna despise this man to the point thinking about him makes her sick? What exactly goes through Luka's mind when it comes to Hyuna specifically? They make me insane in the head i think the day we get more Hyuluka lore is the day i officially pass away forever. Godbless

[virgilmyboy]

Hater me activated rn just a silly rant.

BEFORE YOU READ:

I USED TEXT TO SPEACH SOME OF THIS MADE NO SENSE

I WAS RAMBLING/RANTING ABOUT THIS TO MY PARTNER AFTER GETTING LIKE 10 TIKTOKS IN A ROW LOL

I DONT HATE THE 2020 JUST ANNOYED THAT PEOPLE R FORCING IT AND PARTICIPATING IN AN INSANELY QUICK TREND CYCLE

IM HAVING INSANELY EMBARRASSING FLASHBACKS TO MY CRINGE SELF IN 2020

PLEASE DO NOT JOIN RANDOM DISCORD SERVERS IN TIKTOK COMMENT SECTIONS

Ok so I’ve recently gotten back on TikTok after a like hiatus bc it made me so fucking mad and genuinely so I took a break anyway.

I’m seeing a bunch of people be like omg let’s bring 2020 back!!! 2020core! Anime pfp and petite coats!!!!!! And kandi XD 7yp1ng Qu1rk5!!! Triggers!!!!! Freedom progress! Mha!

And like honestly like honestly, it’s so fucking annoying because most people are doing this I was like a fucking trend like I don’t know. It’s just so fucking infuriating because I’m reading comment of these videos and they’re like oh my God like I threw away all my 2020 all my old stuff oh damn, I need to get more you fucking stupid bitch it was five years ago are you that fucking wasteful with your money and your possessions? And do you like seriously like you were doing it because it was a trend not because you liked any of it like like it’s been five years like why would you have thrown away all of your old like 2020 like they’re gonna be wrong a lot of the stuff 2020 I was into I was I was I was mega cringe. I was a mega loser. And im at homestuck I was a fan you know of and fucking hyper pop and kandi and that shit I still listen to it I still indulge it I still do it. I still even dress like 2020 but people doing it I don’t know it feels so force just because it’s a trend and then like in two weeks time the same people who were like kind of like begging up this trend are gonna be like oh that’s cringe. That’s not cool anymore. that’s so lame and dumb like why would you listen to this? It’s now about infinity scarfs and shit speaking about infinity scarfs and like yeah I saw the comment. Someone was like oh it’s only 2020 we are being oppressed because these people don’t like us being who we are in 2020. No one says don’t bring back 2015 or 2014 yes they fucking did I did I’m not bringing back fucking infinity scar so fucking galaxy lagging when people tried to make that thing I put that shit in the ground I was like fuck no other people were like fuck no it’s like it’s so dumb also I don’t wanna bring back a culture where people felt free and open to the fucking point where people put fucking period blood on their fucking wigs and fucking tampons like everywhere it was cringe as fucking hell and it was gross and disturbing and just horrible and something else but I kind of forget kind of running out of steam, yeah yeah 

—-

Okay, I got things to say like one that’s kind of like super annoying is like I don’t know like the coreification of like interest in the other people like oh like let’s bring back 2020 wearing like whatever or doing like whatever but I’m like like was it bad to do that? Like like a genuine interest in things? I like just things to be like oh make a trend again like I feel like shit like I’m like obnoxiously cringe to everyone like people now like trying to make a trend like was either in like 2021 to 3 and four it’s so annoying I don’t know. 

I don’t know I I think my main thing is like I’m not against like the whole 2020 quote aesthetic“ it’s just mainly like hyper short trend cycle like previously what would maybe take? I don’t know like I can’t remember but I think the trend cycle took like 3020 years for like things to come back in a trend but like now it’s like five years and that’s crazy to me and like it’s not the 2020 thing thing it’s also like the whole like oh now we’re doing the clean aesthetic or like oh we’re wearing baggy pants, bringing back skinny jeans or like oh we’re doing like seaside granddaughter chic it’s just like really scary well maybe not like scary just like stressful cause now I’m like oh God am I out of like trend again or like people being like annoying about it I don’t know.

I get people being like oh 2020 is about like being free to express like who you are but like that’s not the case at least based on what I’ve been seeing cause if anyone says anything to oppose it or even like some like not negative things like I saw one comment and like someone was like oh you know I am happy but like I just kinda wanna make 2025 like my own thing like something new and then people will be like okay? Go back to being plain and boring boring I don’t know like shitting on someone or will be like okay you’re boring on me like boring go like like okay? Ok miss plain jane but like I know so it feels like they just want people I guess currently dressed silly is fine at the end of the day I guess but I just think like understand not everyone’s gonna wanna do that not everyone’s gonna want shit on the face be mindful that you’re being cringe and people can call you cringe just like you can call people like boring, no means or whatever you just gotta accept it and try not to be like so high and mighty about being like I don’t know like about freedom I’m like do what you want cause like I’m kind of being like pretentious like writing this cause like I am I’m cringe as fuck. I dress eccentric. not maybe in like the E I guess at least anymore in the 2020 anyway I think I have my own style. I mean I’m I have my influences obviously but like I just wear whatever I want but I also don’t like try not to push it people unless they ask for it we’re friends or I hate you. I’m a mean bitch I’m now rumble. I don’t know. It’s honestly I’m mainly annoyed that being like shoved in my fucking face every time I go on the Internet like I don’t wanna participate in the new trend leave me alone like I even when I press not interested. I just get like 10 million more.

And like one last thing I think I was like 15 the amount of people I knew that where being groomed because of these like discord servers they’d join bc someone was like “omg join this discord server if you like strawberry cow uwu” not said exactly like that obviously I’m just being dramatic but what I’m getting at is that I’m seeing people do that more again especially under them posts I think I said this like somewhere at the beginning of my purse I can’t remember because I forget I have bad brain and I can’t be bothered to check but like under one of the posts I saw someone like oh join the server if you want like anime profile pics like why do you need a discord that for that? like like in my brain it’s even like an adult being creepy because if they’re posting it and the reminiscing on their teenage years during 2020 then like that’s I don’t know creepy because I am I’m seeing like a lot of like young people expressed interest in like the “2020 aesthetic” and what are you gonna give them that they can’t find unlike Pinterest or like Tumblr or whatever like what it just feels like a slippery slope to me and similar pain I’ve previously seen and experienced myself or like happening to these like kids. and on the other hands it’s like a teenager kid whatever making these posts like to join discord service I feel like and I’m not blaming them because they don’t know any better perhaps anyway that they are inviting a lot of bad adults and young adults because they’re still adults and still dangerous to them essentially and it worries me.

Anyway, I took this too seriously xD (so 2020core)

I’m just yapping

It’s really funny re reading this seeing how fucked the text to speech was and I’m not comma correct it bc honestly it’s funny

I already forgot why I was annoyed for the most part I’m so silly

[mooniechild]

E & D possible bpd disorder (part 1 D)

Okay so for those who don't know I'm a psychology student (yeah that's exactly what you read, now focus)so I gonna bring so reason why we can,and can not say Eric and Dylan may have had BPD, basically I gonna use their behavior, tapes transcriptions,drawing and their journal as a base for this.

Okay so for star BPD is a short for Boderline personality disorder,which is.....exactly a personality disorder wow.... unexpected,okay but what that means? different from a depression or a anxiety which is cause by yours hormones and can be treated with medicines Boderline is not cause by hormonal changes or brain chemistry like those two,which it means that medicate someone with BPD pretty much not gonna help in most of their behavior since is something on their personality and not on their chemicals.

Around 5 million people in the US have been diagnosed with PBD,okay now for Dylan and Eric and why most of the psychologist analysis of them could have been wrong even after years and years after.

1- one of the principal symptoms of BPD is the fear of a abandonment which Dylan demonstrate A LOT in his handwriting, especially after (apparently Zach Heckler) has found a girlfriend, Dylan felt that the world was conspiring against him trying to take the people he love away from him, Dylan saw Zach's behavior as him trying to abandone him after all they had lived together.

2-intense or unstable relationships,Dylan had a back and forth a couple times with Eric, asking his mom to backup him when Eric called and asking her to talk out loud with him so he could give a excuse to not be around Eric for a while,they both had a pretty intense relationship between them,BUT...let not forget Dylan dream girls,which him used to see them as a true love and then notice they didn't care about him at all (according to the man itself) Dylan was desperate to experience a true love like the ones in his fantasy and reading to his journal we can feel how left out of the whole relationship thing he felt,how he felt that he would never be loved back.

3- quick changes in self aspect, D used to have those low and high on his self esteem ever now and then,he would be 'Mr cutter' in a second and hate his nose,and feel complete godlike in another,he would have those up and downs most I think to protect himself in situations that he felt under pressure like around the jocks in school,or in the tape while he was trying to act tough in front of the camera

4- Impulsive and risky behavior is also a very common sign of Boderline,Dylan would scratch a locker, hack school computer with his friends to get the school lockers combo,he would break into a van and apparently even stole credit card passwords,he put himself in danger endless time(honor mention for him pointing a gun to his stomach while reloading it)

5-periods of paranoid,not let me get started it every time Dylan though people was conspiring against him,in a McDonald's as Sue mention on her book,Dylan even write about it on his journal

He mention a couple time felt that people was trying to fuck his life in a almost Godly way, trying to get his Alcyone away from him with all those human feeling's and thoughts and confusion,after a while Dylan started to see NBK as a way to get away from this reality to a whole new one with his love (he is a romantic let him be happy,let the kid dream)

6-Threats of suicide or self-injury, Dylan would very openly talk about his suicide thoughts on his journal,about blowing his head off with a pipe bomb or even shot a poor SOB person(someone is needing to understand his social class)

He discuss about his self harm and about how he felt depressed and with nothing left to live.

7-long feeling of emptiness,well well well look where we got,this sunshine boy is full of that,this feeling could be caused by triggers I think in Dylan case is most about his shyness,he was a very social anxious person, Devon once said he wouldn't go to her party cause some people he doesn't like would come over,so I guess most of his feeling of emptiness was caused by creating those paranoias that people was trying laughing at him.

8-Inappropriate, strong anger, losing temper often, being sarcastic or bitter, or physically fighting. Well I couldn't find anything about Dylan in fact physically fighting,I meant....Brooks on 4th grade doesn't count I guess,once he hit at his co-worker shoulder when she told him about a work Infraction....so yeah,he was know by many person as scary cause he would just be here and stare at them,or bounce at girls in the gym making them fell on the ground, calling Doddy a bitch,and being a asshole with his french teacher slamming doors and whatever at class,he would threat a special student Adam Kyler to kill him if he showed up for class,and he confess being mean to people at his journal,well at being sarcastic....

This men is my favorite sassy machine,he was know for being sarcastic,the whole voodoo thing on Devon birthday card, the way he act at the video he Brooks and Zach made for Mrs Caruthers.

The thing here is, boderline almost never comes alone most people ended up having a 2 or more mental health problems, boderline is more diagnosed on girl's and it didn't have a cure as I said before BUT have some great sources of treatment,the thing is psychology didn't came to a conclusion about how it develope BUT they think is a combination with genetic, environment,and social factors or huge trauma.

SO WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS: D in fact suffered with some sort of mental health problem,and analysing the case for 7 years now I guess we can pretty much see him trough a LOT of angles, searching in the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Health Disorders) a couple hundred times in the last 3 years I tried to comprehend Dylan actions and behavior,and I pretty much can see him getting a diagnostic of BPD,so this is the thread basically hope you guys enjoy,I gonna do a part 2 for Eric:)