#but with music I have no such delusions

[culmaer]

playing music brings me so much joy !! I'm still very much a beginner and sound kinda terrible, and like I know it'll eventually get better with practice. but. there is a certain comfort and reassurance in being bad. it means that, even if I wanted to, I couldn't possibly try to monetise music. this can only be a hobby I do for the love and pleasure of it. it's just for me. and it's so nice having a hobby like that when everything around us is constantly about profitable skills and side hustles and the grind

[rocketqueen1989x]

kiss me baby

[prettygirlformula]

what’s on ur mind? oh idk maybe ‘do i wanna know’ hozier cover bbc radio?? yeah

[mikerztmf]

two ppl asked and i shall deliver!! so have a whole essay about jake-centric drake 👍👍

the natural place to start talking about jake's feelings about drew is near the start of their friendship: the freshman scene in ep9. i think this scene (and ep11) is one of the few points where you can really tell what jake thinks of drew. and to sum it up, he thinks pretty highly of him.

it's never super obvious, but when you think about it, drew really meant so much to jake. because drew was really jake's first friend after middle school, the first person to ever accept him so easily. BUT, he couldn't necessarily tell drew that, bc he'd be forced to open up about his past and his passion for music (which is like. the one thing he doesn't want to do)

and imo, jake caring about drew (and henriam ofc but this ain't abt them) and genuinely wanting to be friends is sort of... integral to who he is as a character, in a way. jake changed himself to keep drew, bc he cared about what drew thought of him. whether or not he was right, jake assumed that drew would bully him/drop him if he ever found out that he liked music. jake didn't wanna lose drew, so he kept quiet and lied. it obviously wasn't RIGHT, but still, it's what he does.

once he got closer to the music club, things got way more complicated though, because jake's lies became more than just lies of omission. and eventually, he grew distant towards drew around eps8-10. HOWEVER, i dont think he was really aware that he was doing it, or that he was inherently being an asshole/bad friend on purpose???

i think that's proven in the drake fight. like, jake lied to protect his friendship with drew, but it obviously backfired on him in the long run ("how am i supposed to know anything about your passion when you don't tell me anything anymore!?"). so jake only actually realised his mistakes, especially how badly he treated drew in the past month of canon, when they were thrown in his face by DREW HIMSELF.

and you see jake himself be surprised before quickly cracking, because he realised that drew was right. he has been lying for years. and it's sorta important to think abt the words here. "if you care so much about your friends, jake, why don't you spit out the truth already?!" ...quickly followed by jake spitting out the truth. not only did (and probably still does) jake care about drew, but he also considered them friends! WHICH ALSO EXPLAINS "nice to know we were never really friends." "that's not...! drew..."

jake trying to defend himself shows that even after everything, he still viewed drew as a friend, and wanted drew to hear him out and stay in his life. like, idk, after he came clean, jake still cared about what drew thought, and hoped that he'd want to still be his friend too.

i talked abt this in my last essay, but jake was so broken up after the fight. sure, it looked like he'd moved on, but the way he thought he saw the jomies at the competition + the right now mep part just kinda proved that he hadn't. and idk, i can only imagine that it hurts - losing your first friend, and only having yourself to blame because you lied to his face in an attempt to keep him.

LMAO SO IDK i think jake sort of did value drew as a friend, and that maybe, just maybe, drake is not as unrequited as people think?? imo their issue wasn't really that it was one-sided, but bc they never told eachother how much they valued eachother (for whatever reason)

[kingandrewburnap]

⚔️⚔️⚔️

[lady-joker]

thinking abt the imagery in so long london and the rest of the album makes me want to throw up. "my spine split from carrying us up the hill" - referring to atlas carrying the world, her relationship was her world and it became such a heavy burden??? the duality of the words so long london, where she says goodbye while simultaneously reminiscing abt the time she spent loving, living and breathing it??? two graves one gun obviously represents the death of the relationship but suggesting that the graves are side bye side so despite being one gun, the death hurt both of them deeply??? i can't do it. truly one of her best track 5s. like wdym she references all her saddest songs in one (tolerate it, the great war, peace, you're losing me etc.) this is just ONE song. i could talk for hours abt the Greek mythology and literary references in the rest of the album. taylor u have outdone yourself with this album and im glad you're in a better place now :)

[coffee-dere]

This song reminds me so so so much of Kangel btw. If you even care.

[tired-fandom-ndn]

That image is useful when replying to suicide bait or violent anons but not so much when you're responding to someone's genuine expression of emotion and I am going to lose my mind if I keep seeing it in response to art or someone talking about a song or something they like.

[noraqrosa]

kinda fucked up that i'm mentally better than i've been in like a decade while being literally homeless rn

this whole situation really forced me to get my shit together better than i ever have, and i'm now finally taking antipsychotics, which is helping to stabilize the fuck outta me

and i know i really need 'em too, whenever i end up taking it later than i should've, i feel myself actively slipping away, spiraling into the aether and trying desperately to hold onto myself and hold it together; it's disconcerting, quite frankly

i'm still working thru a lot of fucked up shit in my head, especially my maladaptive coping mechanisms (i need a fucking therapist tbh), but i'm trying harder than ever, for the sake of myself and the ones around me

i really don't have a choice in the matter...but sometimes having no choice is the swift kick in the rear ya need

[dngrcpckwithmurdericing]

Having a serious George Michael moment at two am.

[ohdeargodwhy]

Okay but if we actually get tedtrent endgame my crops will be watered for 10000 years

[cassandralexxx]

I don’t know what kind of drugs I must be on but tell me why I’m trying to compose a piano piece 💀💀💀

[gracefullou]

you know if I was a larrie and I claimed to genuinely love Louis even just a little bit, or claimed that he was responsible for saving my life at one point, or believed that he was a closeted individual working within the framework of whatever the industry will allow him, the second that I heard the words ‘someone else’s fantasy is nothing like reality, I know that, yeah I know that. for a moment stay with me, and let me feel the freedom that you’re holding” (especially in the context of the very serious subject matter of that song) would be the second that I ceased to make or believe in a single theory about his private life and distanced myself from those who continue to do so for years. I honestly cannot believe that there’s people on this earth who genuinely claim to love him and yet continue to keep fantasizing his life and creating theories to fit their own personal fantasies and deny him the freedom that he deserves to create his own narrative or live his life without the burden of their fantasies and all the negative effects those have on him, his career and his personal life

sorry to dump on you like that I just don’t have any real life louie friends

THIS, thank you anon. The reality is these people are so entitled and think of themselves as the center of Louis and that man's lives. They think these two millionaires have nothing better to do but keep sending them signals about their relationship in every little thing they do 😭. No wonder Louis' career is secondary to them (if that) if they believe it to be secondary to the man himself. These people see the damage they do to his image and career everyday but they just don't give a fuck. I genuinely don't understand how can someone say they love Louis but be ok with the way larries treat him. Every single day, they find something delusional to hate him for. Yesterday, a larrie was "warning" Louis that the sign he did the last show is for white supremacy when that couldn't be further from the truth 😭, today someone else is saying how Louis would've been a horrible person if Larry wasn't real 🤮, they threaten to boycott his projects before they're even out, they find imaginary flaws in everything he does (just recently the whole 28 clothing drama), they nearly had a collective stroke (amen to that) when a louie had a "solo louies and you till the end" sign but were encouraging ugly larrie outfits. They have no respect for Louis' art and make every song about their ship even copy and saved by a stranger 😔 and if you tell them that their obsession with Louis' sexuality is unhealthy and they should leave Louis' songs especially a song like sbas out of their delusion, then you're a delusional homophobic het 🤣. As you said, if you were a larrie, you would've stopped making theories about it the moment you heard sbas, but these people have no shame they use even that as proof for Louis being closeted. Can't even imagine how he must feel, having the burden to deal with their delusions for years (even his family wasn't spared) but still being his lovely self and creating his magical music (only for those freaks to disrespect it like, that it's like screaming at the wall). And that's why i'll always be greateful for louies like the difference in the way they speak of him, of his music. They adore him. For him and nothing else.

[onlyfangz]

what i dont get with the colleen ballinger alleged grooming accusations is if you wanted to brush all of this under the rug why in the fuck would you make an earworm of a song to do it? i have had the chorus stuck in my head since it came out, and every single time it gets stuck in my head, i’m reminded about how much of an evil creep she is.

[elmmni]

utilizing the power of gay love and my girlfriend believing in me to push through the 11 pages of writing due Thursday o7

[starrynightsxo]

anybody ever see random posts on your fyp and then look at the account, like about 15 posts and go to follow only to realise you're already following...? nope? just me... ok.