#but whole damn time. everything hurts in every class and i cant sit still or sit normal or not crack things or rub my joints or anything

[magnoliamyrrh]

oh fuck. i just realized. november is always the month in which my cptsd is maybe worse than ever...,,,, i feel like that has something to do w how badly ive been dissociating lately and why. a myriad of symptoms have come back again

[heyitsyn]

Manager!Seijoh Part 2

a/n: lmao this is kinda weird for me but i think this was an interesting request so lets try it!

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

lowkey kyotani kentaro typa beat but you gotta squint (??)

also warning! angst!

anon request: Hii! I just read the seijoh manager headcannon you wrote, it made me cry so much, i love those seijoh boys so much, and you are such an amazing writer! I dont know if requests are open or not but i was wondering what would happen if the boys ever find out what happened to reader cha? If requests aren’t open or if you just don’t want to write about it, I completely understand! Thank you for your wonderful writing again! Stay safe!

the stageplay was *chefs kiss* like MY MANS IWA WAS SERVING LOOKSSSS

soooooo

this might get really angsty idk so just a warning in advance

anyways

i mentioned in the earlier part that no one really knew what happened to you

so this one is when they DO find out what happened and what theyre gonna do about it

so first off, kyoken was basically the only one who saw you that day and saw how badly you looked

the thing is, at that current moment, he didnt really know the reason why and what happened

he had theories that you got jumped or you just got into an accident 

but he was prettttttyyyy sure you got beat up

so you went home and rushed to yanno, take a shower and get your wound treated and cleaned so that it would heal bc you really cannot afford to let the boys see that

they would think of the worst at the smallest sight of blood on you and you really didnt want to deal w that chaos at the moment

you cant let them get suspended from school since they were going to interhigh soon and you cant let oikawa and the boys ruin their reputations just for you

a first year girl theyve just met

it was kinda hard to rinse all of the milk from your hair but you were able to at least get the smell out and clean up your mess

then you looked in the mirror and saw faint handprints around your throat from that girl miyo and you cringed as you touched it

‘jesus christ, seriously what does she eat? bricks?’

after your clothes were in the wash, you went to bed to get homework done and also looking up how to use the concealer to hide your bruises 

you didnt really own any makeup but your mom has some so you could just use that

during dinner, you wore a turtleneck to prevent any suspicion from happening but you couldnt really hide the big gash on your face

‘y/n, what happened!’

‘i was dumb and accidentally fell up the stairs’

your parents shared a chuckle bc theyve actually seen you do this before so it was easy to believe the lie

‘darling, do we need to get you glasses? it seems your sight has worsened’

‘haha’

you went along with the joke but you weren’t eating and just pushed your food around

‘y/n? is the food not good?’

your mother asked but you shook your head with a convincing smile

‘its good! i just had some meat buns with the team earlier and i ate a lot so im still full’

you cursed at yourself for making it sound so rehearsed but you were relieved when your mother nodded

the next morning, you were satisfied with the reduced puffing of your face and you snuck into your parents bathroom where her makeup bag would be

as you held up the concealer, you started getting anxious because this was not the same shade as your skin and it would definitely raise suspicion if you had a different color on your neck than the rest of your body

you already planned to blame your wound as acne that you accidentally scratched but what were you going to do with the handprints?

the website you read said that it would take at least a day for them to fade

so you decided youd just wear a scarf and pretend you were cold

kunimi was confused as to why you had a scarf bundled around your neck and his eyes even widened at the sight of the bandaid on your face

‘y/n! what-!’

he shot up from his seat and your eyes widened before hissing at him to sit down

‘what happened to you?!’

he worriedly asked but you waved him off with a small smile

‘acne. this was the only available bandaid in my house so i had to work with this’

kunimi might be a lazy little shit but he was observant

and he noticed the way you said that sentence

it was like a robot

like a robot programmed to say what was written on its script

but before he could press on further, you already pointed out that the teacher was coming in and to hush so you could listen

the entire time, kunimi was awake alright, but he was too busy looking at you and a bright red thing that poked from the edge of your bandaid

kindaichi went to your classroom for lunch and you had to repeat your excuse for him but he pointed at another thing

‘why are you wearing a scarf? its like burning in here’

you didnt look at him as you just opened your bento

‘being in your period causes your temperature to fluctuate and cause unexplainable chill at even the hottest places’

okay what

they both shared a look and just shrugged, blaming it on your time of the month for the way you spoke with no emotion in your tone

this had to be the longest school day of your life

the whole time the scarf remained on and kunimi cant help but notice your flinches at the smallest of sounds

finally practice arrived and you really thought you could pull this off until oikawa barreled straight towards you and hugged you tightly

‘y/n-chan! you okay?! oikawa-senpai was so worried for you!’ 

you cringed but nodded

‘im okay, oikawa-san’

‘senpai, y/n-chan! call me senpai!’

‘im not going to feed into your kink, oikawa-san’

*cue everyone busting a lung*

‘y/n, what’s the-’

‘acne. only bandaid available in my house’

eventually, everything was fine

you were still cracking jokes w the others and you were still laughing w them so kunimi and kindaichi were at ease

but that shattered when oikawa was being oikawa and was being all touchy and bothering you about the scarf around your neck that he ended up pulling it off and he saw the marks

he was silent, just staring at them

ofc you were freaking out and you started breathing heavily

oh god he found out and he was going to hurt them

‘o-oikawa-senpai, listen, it’s not what it-’

‘y/n’

his voice made your eyes shut in fear and the others crowded around you and they all had scandalized looks on their faces

‘is this why you werent in practice yesterday?’

his voice was sharp, a complete opposite to his normally cheerful tone

you shivered and sighed

‘senpai, please dont-’

‘who is it?’

the other third years shared a look bc they were truly shook at oiks voice

‘w-why should i tell you?! its none-’

‘i am your captain and i deserve to know who is pulling you away from your managerial duties so he could just give you these damn hickeys!’

the gym turned silent

you stopped then furrowed your eyebrows

‘hickey? what-’

‘dont act like you dont know, y/n. so just be honest and tell me who’s your boyfriend’

lmao i shouldnt laugh bc this was supposed to be sad but im cackling at how dumb oikawa really is sometimes

‘i-i,,,,’

you stuttered but you knew this was the perfect opportunity

you could just blame it on this ridiculous misunderstanding 

its a difficult hole to get out of but it would be easier than the other

so you pretended to be flustered and turned around to hide your face

‘it was a one-time thing, oikawa-san. i promise it wont happen again’

HELLO WHAT

the team was leaking the feeling of RAGE

how dare someone take their manager!

she was theirs!

and it doesnt help that every player might have a little thing for you

is this really turning into a harem

oikawa kept demanding answers but iwa hit him enough to quit and they finally went back to practicing but they were still distracted

every time they looked at you, they would grow flustered and red and end up missing a block or a serve

they just cant see their baby manager like that

you noticed it quickly and irritably got on them

‘stop staring at my neck and get back to practice!’

they flinched and saluted at you

lmao this little first year girl is able to control nearly a dozen <5′10 men who are all older than her

but you were glad that they finally stopped asking about it

this was going to go by smoothly and you were going to be okay

however,,,

several days later,,,

this is an angst fanfiction so i will bring thy angst

you were taking out your class garbage since it was your group’s turn in cleaning the classroom when you were grabbed by the arm on your way back

it was still outside and after school so it wouldve been an unlikely situation that someone would help you

it was that biatch miyo again and her 2 minions behind her

then you recognized one girl from the track team who was actually a year older than you but you saw her dropping off some files in the office

if you tried to run, she could easily grab you w her fast legs

great

you were stuck

you let out a tired sigh and crossed your arms on your chest

‘what is it you want from me, again?’

she smirked

‘you really dont know how to listen, do you? i told you to stay away from oikawa but youre still flaunting around with him!’

is she serious?

this girl was borderline stalker/yandere type of girl

you gave her an incredulous look and frowned

‘girl, do you hear yourself? you damn crazy and im leaving’

but she grabbed you back and shoved you against the wall

but this time, you kicked her on the chest to make her fall on her flat booty

surprise was written on their faces and you stretched your arms in front of you to symbolize distance

‘one more step and ill beat tf out of you. i just got my nails off so id watch it if i were you’

miyo huffed and stood up, brushing herself, glaring at one of the girls who tried to help her

then she remembered what you told her

‘hmm? if you hit me, you could be kicked off of the team since you hurt another student. so, go ahead, little kouhai’

she was right

even if it was self-defense, the school’s disciplinary section sucked and just suspended or kicked off people left and right even though they didnt do anything wrong

you were stumped

you were here on a scholarship, not on tuition

your mom would KILL you if she found out you got into a fight and got a record

but you didnt show that and kept your tough facade

‘dont challenge me. i could be a crazy bitch and i dont think youd like your little face being all messed up. so watch your mouth and leave me alone’

you turned to leave but she grabbed your hair and tugged it back

lmao flashbacks to the other part

she twisted your hair into a ponytail and had a firm grip while a girl kicked you behind your knees so you would fall to the ground

oh no you were done w this

you elbowed miyo on the stomach the hardest you could and she groaned which loosened her hold and you kicked her again to the ground

some other girl hit your side and you winced before slapping her straight across the face bc you didnt want to punch her and hurt your knuckles

but they were really testing you

the last girl still had your hair but you twisted around to face her and just did the last you could think of that would hurt

hit her right between her legs

you finally escaped their hold and miyo lunged after you

‘oh my god leave me alone!’

you yelled before holding up your arms to protect your face but she scratched your arms 

obviously you were losing this bc it was just you but you were going to fight as much as you can

‘bad kouhais need to be punished! your senpais need to teach you a lesson!’

miyo screeched and you grabbed her arm before punching her straight at the boob

sorry rebecca

however, one girl was smart and did the same thing you did to her knees and made you fall to a kneeling position and eventually made you curl into a fetal position

gurl we actually fighting so hard considering we’ve never been in a fight

they continuously kicked you before miyo pulled up your head so you could sit up and kneel in front of her

ofc you tried to grab at her and punch at her

but these other girls were able to catch you and trap your arms in their hold and had their feet on your legs so you couldnt kick

great, another bathroom scene

your arms were bleeding from miyo’s scratches and your sides were hurting after their kicks

you lost and you were already bleeding in places you didnt think you would

this would be the last attempt and if he doesnt come, you’re done for

‘IIIIIIWWWWWAAAAAAAA-SAAAAAANNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!’

your scream echoed throughout the entire are

possibly could be heard in new york

and your voice became hoarse

ofc the girls were surprised and caught off guard but when there was silence and clear that no one was coming, they started laughing

‘oh, so cute! iwa-san? is that supposed to be iwaizumi-san? heh, you whoring around w him too? thats so cute-’

‘LET. GO. OF. HER. NOW.’

I GOT CHILLS

the girls holding you shrieked and dropped their hold on you before scrambling back causing you to drop to the ground

miyo’s eyes were wide and there was horror all over her face at the voice of that infamous boy

kyotani kentarou

‘WHAT THE FK ARE YOU DOING?!’

he yelled and miyo turned around to be met with his piercing eyes before screaming and running away with her minions in tow

‘YEA RUN AWAY! FKING COWARDS!’

ltr the cursing is so awkward for me to do but this is his character and im just so awkward so sorry!!

you coughed and winced at the pain on your side which caught his attention

again, he noticed you as the manager of their team and you’ve been hanging out w him, well, just him staring at you, at the alley while you feed the animals

you were actually nice and caring and definitely didnt deserve this

‘oi, y-you okay?’

you didnt look up, just closing your eyes in pain and biting your lips to not let out the crying

his eyes softened at you and he noticed you were trying to act tough and brave even though you just got beat up

normally, he wouldnt even help anyone but it seems you just did something to him

he sighed before gently picking you up, you not even bothering to stop him, and he held you tightlyin his arms as he carried you to the nurses office

he had a feeling you didnt want to be seen like this and hes been in the nurse enough to know she actually leaves the moment school ends

you let out a shaky breath as he set you down on the cot and you opened your eyes to reach your hold for him when he went away

‘n-no, don’t leave-’

but he grunted softly before holding your wrist

‘im just getting your damn medicine. chill out’

lowkey getting bakugou vibes

you nodded and went to close your eyes again

kyo returned w some pain relief medicine from his bag that he carries 

babie actually gets into fights often and he needs it sometimes

and he had alcohol medicine kind istg and bandaids for your arms

it was silent as you drank the pills and he sat down next to you so he could treat the wounds

but he let his curiosity take over him

‘why the fk did you let them do this to you’

he grunted and you scoffed with a smile

‘let? more like overpower me and grip me as they just hit me’

‘cant you fight them back?’

you glared at him

‘bruh i literally kneed some girl in their cooch but they just some superhuman typa girls that cant be hurt’

he sighed

‘maybe you just werent strong enough’

okay listen here you lil shit

you didnt want to listen to him scold you anymore so you just went back to closing your eyes

but kyo is actually lowkey nosy so he kept asking questions

‘the first time we met. was it her too?’

you flinched in surprise

‘you remembered that?’

‘ofc i did. you looked like shit. not as bad as this but still like shit’

‘gee thanks, stranger-kun’

‘kyotani,,, kentarou’

you smiled

‘nice to meet you, kyotani kentarou. im l/n y/n’

‘i know’

he mumbled but you didnt catch it

‘thanks for hearing me and coming to help’

he hummed

he wasnt going to tell you that he actually heard the scream for his idol and thought hed be there so he ran to go see him but instead saw you

kyo just respects and looks up to iwa-chan so much it warms my heart uwu-

once you were all patched up, you were finally able to stand but you still staggered

he grabbed your arm softly and sat you back down

‘what the hell are you going to tell the team?’

you paused then sighed

‘i dont know. ill figure something out’

but he knew how observant the players would be and they would catch on

after all, he was there watching at the top bleachers as oikawa yelled at you for the ‘hickey’

‘if they didnt hit your face, you could get away with it. but you have wounds all over you and theyd find out. im guessing youre doing this bc you dont want to trouble them or burden them? bc they would do something about it?’

you just stared at this guy

‘how-’

‘just a guess’

he also wasnt going to tell you that he was actually part of the team but the constant fighting got him in suspension

and the fact that his parents were donors for the school, he only got a tap on the wrist

‘so what do i do, then?’

‘tell them-’

‘no i cant do that! another plan, kyo-kun!’

‘oi, im a second year, idiot. treat me with respect’

the irony bc he totally treats oikawa like trash

‘i just,,,, oikawa-san is seen as this prince/gentleman type and i know how protective he is towards me so the slightest problem could cause him to be ballistic. miyo is popular enough to circulate rumors about him and hes already in his third year and she is too so i just have to endure one year until theyre gone’

kyo was disgusted

all this for that stupid idiot captain?

‘youre dumber than i thought’

you weakly hit him at the arm

‘so mean, kyo-san’

‘i dont think its right youre suffering for someone who isnt even worth it’

you glared and linked your fingers together

‘im the manager. i knew this would happen the moment i signed up but i didnt care. as manager, i have to keep up the team’s image and their popularity for support so i cant let all that be ruined just bc a little first year girl couldnt fight for herself’

‘just tell them, kid. less problems’

then he stood up to leave

‘kid?! im only a year younger than you! what you mean!’

but you were panicking

someone knew about you being hurt and they could easily tell the team

and it only increased when he entered the gym and later introduced himself as a player

you were so surprised that you stopped breathing

‘kyo-san,,,’ 

you muttered and he glared at you

well, more like look at you but i have a theory that kyo actually has problems w his sight so it looks like he’s glaring at you constantly but hes just actually trying to see clearly

‘yo’

oikawa was surprised at this interaction

‘eh? you know kyoken-chan?’

you nodded, still looking at the blonde

‘i-uh’

‘its none of your business’

kyotani grunted and you sighed in relief

maybe your secret would be safe

you were still uneasy about him accidentally revealing it, especially since he practically worships iwaizumi-san, but he kept his mouth shut

your caring personality at first was overbearing on him but he appreciated your efforts like volunteering on helping him with his eyeliner or asking him if he needed help with his medical tape

ngl, he also thought you were there just bc it was a team full of guys and you thought you could have that weird girl fantasy of having a harem

but you cared for them like practically a mother and continuously made it clear to oikawa that you were NOT interested in going on a date with him

you werent annoying, you were nice, and you weren’t pushy so he actually showed you respect and took a liking to you

this created a soft of protectiveness around you

sometimes, he would see you around school and he would practically glare at the girls he knew hated you

and when he wasnt there to protect you, you would call him to the nurses office where he would mumble apologies of not being there while patching you up before he would go over and threaten them to touch you again and he would bite their fingers off

aww hes so cute

ofc he still kept your secret bc it wasnt his business to tell 

until that one day

it was normal practice with you helping the boys toss the balls so they could spike it

iwaizumi spiked it really hard making you flinch and he apologized profusely after you almost fell off the chair you were standing on in surprise

‘im just angry that that damn shittykawa is the captain and is late to his own damn practice’

oikawa? late?

that was unheard of

you were about to get off the chair and look for him when the devil himself entered the gym with the devil’s mistress on his arm

miyo was holding on to his arm as he laughed at something she said and ruffled her hair

you dropped the ball and kyotani quickly moved to you so he could stand in front of you protectively

‘oi! shittykawa! youre late!’

oikawa just smiled and pointed at the girl

‘miyo-chan made us cookies, iwa-chan!’

at the mention of food, the boys ran forward but you and kyotani remained at the side at the infamous name

you got off the chair and hurriedly placed an arm in front of him

‘don’t, kyo-san’

‘the bitch-’

‘i know. but please, dont’

you begged and he huffed before aggresively wrapping an arm around your shoulder

aggressively cares for you

‘if she does something or even talks shit, i will-’

‘kyoken-chan! y/n-chan! come here!’

oikawa called but kyotani snarled at him

you smile wobbled when miyo’s eyes narrowed at you and she smirked

‘oh? your manager is so cute, oikawa-kun!’

the rest of the team was just blinking at this weird tension

kyo had his arm tightly around you and hatingly glaring at this girl, who was icily smirking at you, and you tightly holding kyo’s shirt with a worried glint in your eyes

‘you were late to your own damn practice, oikawa. stop wasting time eating this shit and go back to playing’

tbh it still shocks you at how rudely kyo talks to oikawa but you were too pre-occupied on making sure this kid wasnt going to lunge at this girl

‘a-ah, right. oikawa-san, we have to return to practice. if you excuse us, miyo-san-’

you were about to gently grab oikawa’s arm to bring him back when she grabbed your wrist and secretly gripped it

‘oh, dont be so uptight, y/n-chan! i worked so hard-’

but kyo immediately snatched her hand away from you and squeezed it as tight as he could, making her wince

oikawa noticed the pain in miyo’s face and he was angry that kyotani was hurting a girl

‘oi! kyotani!’

he shouted and pushed him away, making the team, even iwa, worriedly look at kyo and brace themselves for the beating

iwa jumped into action and held the second year back while you jumped in front of oikawa

‘kyo-san, calm-’

‘you! be quiet’

he shouted, finger pointing at you

‘and you!’

before pointing to oikawa

‘you are a shitty captain’

‘kyotani!’

iwa was just straight out confused and hes really questioning life decisions right now

mom is stressed and confused, i repeat, MOM IS STRESSED AND CONFUSED

oikawa’s eyes narrowed but he just calmly talked

‘we’ll talk about this later’

‘miyo-san, we really need to practice so if you could see yourself out’

iwa gently smiled to the girl, who was about to protest, but makki and mattsun has already pointed to the door

she huffed then turned to leave and once she was gone, iwa let go of kyotani

‘kyotani, what the hell was that’

oikawa lowly asked and you were about to put your arms out to separate them but yahaba and watari grabbed you so you wouldnt be caught in the middle

then kyo turned to you, fire in his eyes

‘either you tell him or i will’

can we just talk about how protective kyo is?

you trembled and you roughly left yahaba and watari’s grip so you could gently place your hands on his chest

‘please, kyo. just leave it, okay? remember, it’s my busi-’

‘if i see that bitch enter this gym again, i dont give a flying fuck if shes a girl. ill beat the living daylights out of her’

‘kyotani kentarou, what-!’

oikawa shouted but your glare shut him up

‘y/n-chan, what is going on’

‘n-nothing. kyo-san is just, yknow, being him. you know? okay. now lets get back to practice, everyone!’

coach irihata and the other guy sharing that look

to say the least, miyo was pissed

and when she was pissed at you, she always did what she normally does

she corners you wherever its deserted and beat you with the help of her minions who holds you down while she slaps, hits, or kicks you

girlie you needs to tell the boys youre literally getting hit and abused and im just-!!!!!!!!!

and thats exactly what she did

only this time, she wore hard-tipped shoes

‘see, y/n-chan? i saved up and got these shoes just for you!’

the minions were just sharing looks of fear and genuine sympathy for you

they were only there bc she blackmailed them with pictures doing questionable things and if they dont help, they would be released

as usual, you didnt cry, biting your lip as you winced from the pain of her kick at your side

‘youre so pathetic. how could you do this to a person? and all this for your oikawa-san? for a boy?’

you wheezed at her causing her eyes to flare

‘HAH?! SAY THAT AGAIN!’

‘i said-’

but you were cut off when she slapped the soul out of you

her ring cut you at the lip and you cringed at the taste of blood from your lip

‘what else? we gotta hurry this up, miyo, because practice started like 5 minutes ago and im going to get yel-’

‘SHUT UP!’

kyotani entered the gym after his talk with his teacher and immediately looked around for you

his honey brown eyes scanned the area and they widened as your figure wasn’t in sight

‘oi, yahaba, wheres the manager’

the boy shrugged from the side 

‘i dont know. shes late though’

oh god

‘kindaichi! kunimi! youre in the same grade right? did you see where she went after class?’

kunimi paused to remember before answering

‘she stayed after to talk to obe-sensei for the homework, that’s all i know’

that meant she stayed behind and was probably somewhere

‘SHIT!’

he shouted before bolting out the door

ofc the boys were all worried of his outburst and started yelling after him

‘kyotani!’

‘kyoken-chan?!’

they followed him, who was running as fast as he can

the girls would probably do it outside to avoid having to clean up their mess and he almost wrenched the door open in a hurry to take a lap around the school building

it was certainly a sight to see: a boy with dyed blonde hair and two brown lines followed after an entire volleyball team who were screaming after him

‘YOU-!’

he heard that bitch voice and bolted towards the back, where the dumpster was, and found you at the same position like the first time he saw you

blood was dripping on the floor from your busted lip and a cut on your cheek while your eyes were wide at the sight of kyotani’s panting form

‘kyo-!’

‘kyotani!’

your eyes watered at the sight of the entire volleyball team behind him, also eviqualiently surprised yet fuming angry

the girls who held you dropped your arms and ran for the hills so they wouldnt get caught

kyo pushed miyo aside as he grabbed you from the floor and held you

oikawa gave miyo a look that cannot even be described in words

all it was: incredibly, super, ridiculously, heatedly, furiously, angry

now multiply that by the entire team

‘hm, my father, who is the chieftain of the police, mentioned about there being jail time for even minors who commit serious acts like assault or bullying’

mattsun seethed

‘really? i think he’d like the video as evidence against kenta miyo for assault and battery, including bullying, so how many years would that add up to? nearly a decade?’

the girl miyo squeaked as oikawa and iwaizumi roughly grabbed each wrist

‘how long’

miyo trembled at the increased pressure on her wrist

‘IM ASKING YOU A FUCKING QUESTION! HOW LONG!’

iwaizumi has never shouted at a girl before and hopefully, it would be the last

‘s-s-since l-last month’

you burrowed your head in kyotani’s shirt

‘please dont’

‘shut the fk up, y/n-chan, we’re not talking to you right now’

oikawa coldly reprimanded

‘everyone, take y/n away. iwaizumi and i can take care of this. but mattsun, makki, track down those 3 girls and find others who have even touched our manager’

‘got it, boss’

if it was in a different situation, you wouldve applauded oikawa at his ability to be a leader but you were currently in pain from the bruises and the cuts all over you

your fellow first-years were angrily punching things in the nurse’s office

rip nurse in the morning when she finds holes all over her walls

the irony is, the most agressive one, kyotani kentarou, was the calmest as he quietly cleaned your wounds and placed ointment on the bruises

‘i told you so’

he mumbled and you scoffed

‘howd you find me anyways?’

‘dumb bitch yaps really loud’

he answered

no one was yelling at you and no one was saying a word

eventually, oikawa and iwaizumi entered followed by the rest of the third years

‘why. why didnt you tell us, y/n?’

oikawa asked as he sat down on the chair beside the bed

you looked down and fiddled with your fingers

‘if i did, you wouldve hurt her. and she wouldve spread rumors about you and ruin the image and reputation of the grand king and the volleyball team. i didnt want to do that to you and thought i could just endure it one year since youre graduating anyways’

iwaizumi sucked in a harsh breath

‘you wouldn’t have known what we were going to do. you are no oracle and you dont know how we are going to handle this situation. so you were really stupid for keeping these things to yourself, y/n. you may be our manager and our caretaker but let us take care of you too’

you nodded but your tears fell

‘sorry. im really sorry. i didnt meant to trouble you’

‘stop apologizing, y/n’

‘sorry’

‘y/n!’

you bowed your head low and bit your lip in guilt

‘i shouldve told you but i didnt and now everyone is troubled-’

‘we’re a team, y/n. youre not a lone wolf anymore. you have a pack standing right beside you’

watari mumbled and he sat down to give you his favorite hug: the one arm hug

‘im super angry right now and it might seem like im snappy but i really want you to know, y/n, that i really love you and i am just hurt that you didnt trust us enough to tell us you were suffering when i trust you with my entire being. so next time youre hurting or in pain, dont you dare keep it to yourself. tell us, okay? tell your senpais and friends about it so we can share that burden’

oikawa babie you are so mature like what-

what started out as a hug from watari turned into a team hug around the tiny bed, even kyo joined, and you were so happy you found a good team that appreciated you and everything youve done and accepted you as one of their own

‘oikawa-san, what did you do to miyo?’

‘again, im mad y/n-chan, so please dont talk about her right now’

‘iwa-san?’

‘dont use those puppy eyes on me! dont you dare-- okay, we’re pressing charges’

silence

‘WHAT?!’

‘and iwa-chan slapped her!’

‘WHAT?!’

‘shut up shittykawa you did too!’

‘WHAT?!’

a/n: this hurted a bit and im sorry if this was lowkey awkward and all over the place but i didnt exactly know how to portray this situation since ive never experienced this, just bullying in general, before but for those who have, please tell someone so that you dont have to carry that burden by yourself. it doesnt have to be a your parents, but talk to a trusted adult so that this type of stuff doesnt happen to you bc you truly dont deserve that type of treatment and deserve to be happy and feel safe in an environment like school or anywhere in general

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s stepkid

Tony Stark x Potts!child!reader

warnings: alcohol mention

a/n: i rushed these so bad i just wanted to post dhhshsnsna

prompt: y/n is pepper’s kiddo!

it was just you and your mom for a long time

pepper and y/n potts

she couldn’t keep up with you sometimes, too busy dealing with the manchild that was mister anthony edward stark

speaking of—

“uh, who’s this?” -tony, pointing at you

“mr. stark, i am so sorry, the school closed because some kid set fire to the science lab and i didn’t have time to find a sitter—”

“no, it’s fine, no need to apologize. hey, kid, you wanna sit in the boss’s chair? i’ll let you run the company for the day!” *cue you nodding* “sweet, would you mind that, ms. potts?”

“oh? no, not at all” *mouthing* “thank you”

“so, uh, what’s your name? no, don’t tell me: ketchup.”

*giggling* “y/n”

“no way! that was my second guess!”

tony wasn’t used to being around kids

he had no idea that he was actually kind of good around them

despite a few minor hiccups

“you sit in my chair and im gonna spin you around, sound like fun?”

he spun you around WAY too fast and you were diiiiizzy, also you fell off the chair

“don’t tell your mom that we did that. she may be my assistant, but she scares the shit out of me. also, don’t say ‘shit’”

dude he just thought you were a cool kid!!!

“hey, you know, ms. potts, you dont really need to hire a babysitter anymore. y/n’s doing just fine hanging out here”

“how am i not surprised you befriended an actual child?”

she still took him up on his offer, you seemed pretty happy

when your mom worked late, you passed out in tonys office

tony and you had your own little secrets (like falling off the spinning chair), tony showed you around stark tower, and you practically lived there

“i got you a happy meal from mcdonalds!” -tony every day after your school

in all honesty, you weren’t the “popular” kid at school...not even close

but tony made up for it

“y/n! i found this old racecar toy in a box of old stuff, you wanna hold onto it for me?”

you kind of grew up in stark tower tbh? it was pretty cool

and as you grew up, you started to notice more

“mr. tony, do you have a crush on my mom?”

“do i what? no, no, i do—who the hell am i kidding? you caught me”

“called it!”

after that you did everything to try and get them together

when your mom was talking to tony, you would stand behind her and wiggle your eyebrows and just taunt tony endlessly

no! tony cannot remember your mom’s birthday for the life of him! you are his calendar now

“dude, why dont you just ask JARVIS to remind you?”

“i may be a genius, but that doesn’t mean i have common sense”

“wise words, sir” -JARVIS

when tony disappeared for 3 months you were so sad???? like you were not okay at all

no

and when he came back, he literally exited the plane saying “WHERE’S ‘T-POTT??’”

(your wonderful nickname. ‘t’ for ‘tony jr.’ and ‘pott’ for ‘potts’)

“my mom missed you”

“oh, i bet she did”

“you turned my child into you, tony. i will never forgive you for this”

“well, at least y/n was here to fill in for me, huh?”

tony wanted to show you the arc reactor but he was actually afraid of scarring you lmfaoooo

but he did let you in on the iron man secret (he knew you wouldn’t snitch)

and just to make sure:

“if you dont tell anyone, i’ll buy you a car when you turn 16”

“man, that’s like, forever away”

“good, maybe you’ll forget by then”

ur mom kinda maybe sorta found out abt iron man :/ she told you that tony was a bad influence

“mom! no, tony’s cool! he’s like a superhero”

“no, sweetie, he’s a rich guy with issues. we’re leaving”

that didn’t last long

not long at all

and soon they FINALLY got together

“jeez, i thought you two would never stop pining after each other”

“couldnt have done it without my wingman” -tony *fistbump*

“as thanks can i have my own iron man suit?”

“yes.” *pepper glaring at him* “no.”

sooner or later your mom and you moved into tony’s house and you got a really big room!!!!

it was completely decked out

king sized bed, flatscreen tv, mini-fridge, microwave, computer, your own bathroom with a smaller tv, a poster of tony??? (you vandalized it and put it in his workshop), and more!!!

okay you were spoiled

“do you like it here? are you sure i made the right choice?” -pepper

“are you kidding, mom? this is awesome! plus, you’re happy, i’m happy, tony’s happy, i think JARVIS is even happy!”

“i am, mx. potts. simply ecstatic” -JARVIS

pepper was really happy!! it was a pretty cool family

you started giving your school tony’s number if you ever got in trouble, you knew he’d cover for you

“mr. potts, is it?”

“sure”

“your child, y/n, punched another student in the face today. we’re very disappointed in their behavior”

“why’d they punch the kid?”

“well, the other student punched y/n first”

“HAH! thank you for wasting my time. send y/n back to class and call me back if something important comes up”

he literally gave you a high five when you got home

“i gave him a black eye!”

“i couldn’t be more proud. i mean, i dont condone violence, but self defense is a whole other story”

a little help in the workshop, tony asks you to hold the flashlight

“why don’t you get one of your robots to hold this for you?”

“are you kidding me, you’re complaining? we’re having stepdad/stepkid bonding time! and dum-e can’t do anything right, i dont trust him”

youve had a few theme park trips as a family ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

also tony has 100% told you to wait in the car and then left you alone for 2+ hours

“i’m not like a regular dad, im a step-dad. want some beer? you can have a little sip. i’d rather you do it in the house”

your mother actually does love how he actually cares about you!

“y/n is 12% my responsibility” -tony

“tony, you are impossible” -pepper

no avengering for you! pepper said no!!!!!!

disappointed but not surprised

iron man 3: y/n potts is put through the wringer

Text Message to Mr. Tony: bro you better come get your girl, me and happy are watching this other guy flirting with her. he’s showing her pics of his ‘big brain’

Mr. Tony: HE WHAT

Text Message to Mr. Tony: Tony he looks creepy i don’t want him to be my new stepdad do something!!!

anyways ur house kinda blew up and ur mom and you kinda got kidnapped and u were right abt that guy being creepy and thankfully no experiments were done on you but like your mom kinda almost died and her and tony were fine!!! all good in the end

you met mr. col. james rhodes that day

“aw, you’re the kid ive heard so much about” -rhodey

“you mean the coolest kid in the world?check.”

“you cant tell me you aren’t tony’s biological child, good god”

you got to meet the avengers later on too! (you’d already met natasha tho, only briefly)

“i know it can be a little overwhelming, right? meeting all these heros, legends even—” -rhodey

“oh, my god, is that thor? thor!!” -you, leaving rhodey in the dust

literally why does pepper trust you around tony something always goes wrong there were literally robots attacking, you were only at avengers tower bc your mom was busy with the company and she thought you’d be safe with the avengers. the AVENGERS.

“please dont tell your mom that i created a bad robot that tried to kill us. the robot will be the least of our problems” -tony

he made happy pick you up and you had to miss out on FUN and it sucked a lot

“it’s okay, y/n! i’m fun, too!” -happy

then your mom and tony took a break and your life got mega-boring for a while, but they weren’t separated for that long. you try not to think about it. it was brutal

Mr. Tony: Does she miss me?

New Message to Mr. Tony: I think so. Either that or she’s crying and drinking wine in the dark for no reason.

Mr. Tony: Damn it, now I feel bad. I miss her a lot. Oh, also, the Avengers say ‘hi,’ I’m in Germany with some bad news, I’ll explain later if you don’t see it on TV first, and I found you the perfect friend! His name is Peter and I think you’d like the school he goes to, it’s in Midtown. Smart kid school.

New Message to Mr. Tony: I’ll look into it, thanks. Also, I don’t like how those all connect. Please update me asap

watching the news to see several avengers arrested, cap on the run, and more!

“maybe it was good i didn’t fall in with the avengers”

tony and pepper finally got back together and you actually transferred to midtown high! peter and his friend group accepted you quickly, it was great. you and flash unfortunately had the most in common

you’d literally text happy right next to peter and he’d immediately reply to you. it hurt peter’s feelings

Momma: Sweetie! I’m working in the office late, leftovers are in the fridge, hope you have a wonderful day at school! 💕

👉👈the vulture tried to kill you for being tony’s stepkid, tony made peter promise to protect you

“y/n, you gotta stay out of harm’s way. mr. stark gave me an actual mission and it’s terrifying, i have to make sure you stay safe”

legit why the fuck was this old man tryna kill you bro grow up

anyyyywayssss your mom and tony got engaged!!

“wow, i thought the day would never come!!” -you

ppl told you tony isnt your stepdad bc ur mom and him werent married but who tf asked

why is the earth always in fucking danger

you and peter were just vibing on the field trip bus and all the sudden: space donut

“go! i’ll cover for you...FRIDAY, call tony”

“...hi there, little one”

“what the fuck”

“oh, so you see the aliens, too? well, at least im not crazy”

tony stark has left the atmosphere

you and your mom were kinda......not chillin tho

she and you didn’t sleep for a few nights, then ppl just straight up disappeared

plot twist: you survived the snap and your family was lucky to be alive, you even got a little sister who became a big handful!

only bad thing was all your friends dusted and you were pretty lonely

but watching morgan grow up kept you busy

“ahhh, shes so big!”

happy times in bad times

bad times!!!!! bc after five years thanos came back as thanos from like ten years ago. outdated thanos. obsolete thanos.

but you made your first and only appearance in the suit tony actually designed for you many years ago

you should have just stayed home tho bc that fight didnt pass the vibe check

“please dont tell me he...no, no, no, no, no”

you and your mom latched onto each other in tears, tony was one of the best people in your life, he made you and your mom two of the happiest people on earth

best stepdad a kid could ever ask for

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @lokihiddles // @frostedgiantfavs // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisbisexual // @teenwaywardasgardian // @pappydaddy // @captainshazamerica // @freya-xo // @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm // @ofthedewthesunlight //

[thisdreamplace]

ashamed to say the 3D reflects our true inner reality, yes? my ENTIRE family has turned against me, after some atrocious conflicts in which they all ganged up on me nd judged me, name-calling, very hurtful things too, provoked me. i been dealing with some serious mental uh 'issues' on my own nd when this happend i was already on the verge of a breakdown nd the good news is while the conflict happened i kept telling myself theyre only reflecting me u can get thru it etc. Later i looked at the hard facts nd realised some of the hurtful things they said were my deep secret feelings abt myself. BUT my question is why the HELL cant they talk to me like normal people? confronting one person vs whole family, why?! i felt so small nd like an object, nd not a single person defended me. am i not a part of the family?

Part 2 is simply its been a week and theyve still been cold towards me as if I yelled AT THEM ABT THEIR PAINFUL 'tRuThS' in front of EVERYONE LMAOOO. At first if i was around we'd have dinner together while they'd all talk to each other like best friends aka sickeningly overly friendly while completely IGNORING me while i sat there. i could tolerate it. I WAS PISSED AT THEM TOO Now its too painful. They're having dinner without telling me, yesterday didnt leave enough food for me knowing i hadnt eaten, serve tea/snacks without my portion. i honestly feel so unspeakably trigered nd sad. worst is these things r reminding me of deep school memories when id feel excluded like this by other kids at parties or class activities nd its like im back there. anyway im glad i controled myself a bit nd didnt counter with horrid things abt them to THEM yet they think they can say the same to me. im so hurt rn i cant even tell u lol i was okay the whole week but now its too much,, ive been crying the whole day

thing is, ik this seems like 'im a victim oh noooo they ganged up on meee'. Nope its more like how do i change myself to change them?! u could say why not talk to them how they made u feel, except whenever ive defended myself in the past regarding hurtful things they/anyone in family did, the siblings/parents would say irritating things like: "oh so YOU'RE the one hurt? Oh thats right, its because YOU'RE right! yes, yes, you're always right. Forgive me for saying anything against the perfect person u are." Or one of them says: "You?! I hurt YOU? What about me? You don't care about me! So you think what ur doing is okay?" or "no, who do YOU think u are to tell ME what to do?" it just goes in circles like this! i dont deserve to hurt myself or do smth to myself even if they dont give a damn, even if years of silent suffering of the 'mEntAL pRoBlEms' (which my lovely parents have already told me is my fault years ago, hence why I NEVER show it to them, unless im crying too much then lol they just mock me, but idc abt THAT bcoz now ik i hav a right to let out my emotions)). i mean this is worse rjan usual. its kinda insane nd when guests come they start talking to me as if nothing's wrong then when they leave, they ignore me!

this whole twisted dynamics, feelijf left out nd helpless is ig some crazy assumptin from childhood of being alone nd unable to defend myself. plus when they argye with anyone, they become overly self-righteous nd over the years its clear they can only scream, blame the scapegoat and never talk abt serious matter like normal ppl. And yes, in the past when i bring this up, they like to reply with stuff like: "no YOU'RE the one who doesnt talk to US bla bla" like, when i do u just shut me down? have belittled my mental 'issues', mocked me when im at my worst, stabbed me with cruel silent treatments nd thinking its alright "bcoz of self-righteousness blegh". Or maybe i think its okay for them to punish me? or whatev? Like law says u get what u r. if these ~~~ keep doing this to me, im doubly ashamed to say this means im the one at fault?! i let this monster assunptin grow nd now idk what to do. the worst thing imo is how i failed to tell them,even if they ignored me in the past, how i feel when anything like this or a conflict happens nd none of them stand up for me, or at least are neutral to me. bcoz now if i do, they say nope, u dont care what we do, YOUR the shameless one :! so yeah they hav the advantage of 'numbwrs' while im too afraid to stand up for myself lol. btw they never apologize nd i suspect they expect ME to apologize to TYEM bcoz everything's already ruined bcoz of 'me'..... i give up on them, i really do, but my heart hurts. Either i harden my heart, nd save up to move out, OR i try to change my self or whatev assumptins i have. But how do i do that? i try afirming: "my familys so nice to me, im respected by them" but it feels so fake tears literally enter my eyes lol

firstly i want to say, thank you for coming here to vent and being open about your feelings. it’s so important sometimes to just let it all out, without holding back. so that way you can move forward more bravely, to create the life you truly want to experience. that being said, i am going to be completely honest with you here in hopes that perhaps it may inspire you and you will be ready to do what is needed for the life you truly want to experience.

“BUT my question is why the HELL cant they talk to me like normal people?” -> “i felt so small nd like an object, nd not a single person defended me. am i not a part of the family?” here is your question, and here is your answer. i think that being completely honest when venting your feelings can actually be so helpful, because if you read back what you have said, you will be able to clearly find the patterns that are creating your personal hell. FEELING IS THE SECRET. ASSUMPTIONS HARDEN INTO FACT. the true way you feel, becomes your experience. Feelings/assumptions/beliefs come first, and the experiences come second to confirm them. That’s all that’s happening here.

i am glad that you were able to keep your reactions to a minimum! that's wonderful and as many of us know, it can sometimes be hard to do in such hurtful circumstances. but you managed to do it, this shows just a small glimpse of the power you truly hold within. although emotionally you may feel out of control, there is still the choice to choose better for yourself which you demonstrated through your reaction to them. good for you!

the truth is, you acknowledge the victim mindset to seem like you’re not engulfed in it, but no, you’re still very clearly engulfed in it. as i have said before, you can’t be a VICTOR and feel bad about it. feeling bad about taking responsibility, about everyone is you pushed out, about any of these types of concepts automatically shows a victim mindset. talking to them won’t do anything, because there are no second causes. you could talk to them nicely, you could be the nicest person in the world. but you can’t pretend your way out of your inner world. your inner world is the one and only cause of your experiences. until you change the story you tell yourself, they will stay the same. this is a hard pill to swallow sometimes. and it can feel heavily, because it’s ultimately only you’re choice. they can’t change until you do. the heaviness of the situation may make it seem impossible to turn around, but that’s just an illusion. your emotional attachment to the situation makes it seem so real and hard to change, but no. that’s just an illusion too. however, it’s ultimately your choice. Do you want to take responsibility for your life, or do you want to keep being tossed around like your lost at sea, victim to the merciless angry waves? Because we always have a choice. No one chooses your inner world, you do. No one can go into your mind and decide things for you, that’s only your job.

you can harden your heart, but who would be the one who suffers more? It won’t be your family, i can assure you. it’ll only be you. by doing that, you keep that old story alive and therefore you keep experiencing it. you keep those stories alive that are desperately showing themselves to you, saying “LET US GO.” but you remain identified with those painful stories, so you grip onto them tight. you keep on thinking of possible reasons for their behavior, but you could just read your entire ask back to yourself and you’ll see every reason. your reactions, your beliefs about them, your emotional pain. its your refusal to let those things go, and focus on what you truly want that keeps you in this state and keeps them in this state. sure it’s painful to face the responsibility at first, but it’s not a blame game. thinking its about blame is just a misunderstanding of the teachings. it’s not about they’re so perfect and you’re so not, so you have to change your ways. it’s about this is how life works here. this is about... you can ONLY ever experience self. whatever is going on within, will be reflected in your outer world. it’s about how they can’t change, UNTIL YOU DO. so instead of feeling sorry for yourself, you have to decide to give yourself the gift of a wonderful life because you have that power too. you stop deciding they can be in control of your experience, and you decide your experience yourself.

to change your assumptions, stop trying to affirm over them and actually face what’s keeping you from believing in your desires. yeah, it’s going to be painful and uncomfortable. but you need to face the pain that you’re running away from, so that it can finally be released. you have to realize, it only stayed true because you believed it to be true. and if you are to live a life free from that story, and experience a more desirable story, then you must let the pain go. give yourself love and grace as you work through it, and know that there is a more beautiful side of life that awaits for you to accept it in.

No One To Change But Self

There is Nothing to Forgive

How to Sit with Your Triggers

give yourself the time you need, it's not race. the love that you wish to experience exists, allow it in. 💖

[theravencawsatmidnight]

Rabbit ii

More of my purely indulgent fic of Draco Malfoy 💚

W! Mean! Draco(kinda) possessiveness

Tags @khemz1312 @squeaky-ducky

Draco pulled himself away from you to fix his robes and roll his shoulders straightening himself out. The stare he gave you made you shake in your knees, what did you do? It was his lackeys not you..

“The next time.. this happens..”

“It was them not me!”

Draco raised a brow at you, at that raised voice. He stepped over grabbing your face with a smile that seemed to go all the way up his face.”who are you yelling at?”

“Im not.. i.. i mean..i didn't mean too..”

“Should i tell Hufflepuff they have a cheater in the house?”

“No!!” You grabbed his robe pleading with him.

Draco let go of your face to rub your cheek with his thumb. “Say your a good badger who would never yell at her superior” he told her with a smirk.

You did not want to cry in front of him, everytime you did he would lick your cheek and tell you how sweet you taste.. instead you hid your face in his chest to hide your tears while you spoke. “Im a good ba-badger who would never yell at her superior”

You could feel Draco stroking your back in slow movements. “Such a well behaved badger, a good rabbit.” Slowly he took his wand out. “But i think.. i should still punish you.”

The same second you looked up at him he waved his wand around at you .

Everything got much.. much bigger around you. Everything seemed closer and your sense of smell was heightened.. and all you could think about was carrots….

Draco kneeled down, tipping his head looking satisfied with himself . “Perfect. Lets hope i can figure out how to change you back. But never mind that, lets go to class” he scooped you up in his hands and held you up by a nearby mirror looking very happy. “Look at you, so fluffy now” . Your long ears shot up and you began to panic. You were a white rabbit.

***

You were panicking in his grip. No no no. not this. You cant talk, nothing! You had to completely rely on Draco till he changed you back… you looked up at the happy man who was making kiss faces at you telling you how cute you looked like this. He opened his cloak to place you inside a pocket and scratched your head with a finger. “Off we go yeah?” he teased as he started to walk. Draco was so focused on you he did not realize his father had passed him in the hall seeing him talk to a snowy white rabbit. All you could think about was changing back and running away, somewhere safe. Maybe Hagids Hut...but all you could do for right now was wait it out.

The class was spells with Professor Snape. Your ears fell behind you when you heard his voice. He would not help you change back. Draco sat down in the back taking you out of his pocket to place you on his lap and scratch your chin. The look he gave you was demeaning…. So happy with himself, satisfied with his work. Treating you like a legit animal and turning you into one. What if he never figured out how to change you back!? You hopped in a circle on his lap panicking all over again. Snape isint gonna help me, what am i gonna do ?! what if i hop away and find help, but i cant talk!! And Draco would probably turn me into a frog ! what about.. McGonagall, she can turn into a cat maybe she could help me...

“Shh shh… pretty rabbit” he spread his legs slouching in his chair.” Be good and i might change you back.” his tone was condescending and hurtful, he had all the power right now. Your ears fell behind you again and you hopped to his stomach nuzzling his shirt up and over your eyes trying to pretend you were anywhere else. He cooed down at you scratching your rear and tugging your ear lightly. “Arent you cute when you wanna be ey? You didint want to snuggle the other night but look at you now.” you felt his hand scratch at your rear again. Why would i want to snuggle after what you did… “I like having you there Rabbit. Gets you used to my scent and i can feel your little wet nose wiggling against my chest, your cold padded front feet kneading my lap.” shut up.. I hate this, i hate it.. his long fingers stroked along your back, back and forth. “Your so fragile like this, a defenseless little Rabbit, if i change you back will you do this for me when your human?” he asked you, expecting an answer. What? Does he mean cuddle? You shook your head and budged your face into his chest feeling really sad. Why me, he could have picked on anyone else. If he changes me back im going to ask… You stretched a leg out getting sleepy. Why does that feel .. so nice.. Why is he being like this.. “aww, “ he tickled your little foot, smirking big. “Comfy on me? How adorable. Lets hope Snape doesn't call on me for some bloody demonstration” Draco turned his attention to the man, a hand still on your back rubbing ever so slowly, lulling you right to sleep.

Later on you woke up from the sound of students and the smell of food. It was dark and you could only see Draco a little bit . you must be in his pocket again. I slept the whole class? Is it lunchtime? The day is almost over then. Im hungry.. Dracos robe pockets were deep, deep enough for you to sit comfortably in his robe with two front feet sticking out in front of you. It was cozy… you wished it wasn't. All you could smell was him, all you could really hear was him, him him him… You yawned kicking your back feet around alerting Draco that you were awake. He moved his arm a bit so his robe opened making it easy for him to see you. He smiled down at you and held out some of a carrot for you. “Have a nice nap Pet? You slept the whole class” he held his robe open with his free hand .

You sniffed the carrot hearing your tummy growl. Dammit why is he like this… i am hungry..

It was mentally painful for you to do but you held your mouth open and Draco placed the carrot on your bottom teeth chuckling to himself.

“Malfoy? Where'd you get the rabbit?” Crabb asked him, from the opposite side of the table.

“Never took you for an animal lover mate.” Goyle added.

“None of your business, its for class” he snapped at them before feeding you again.

Ugn,,, just give me the whole thing… you kicked your feet and Draco glanced down at you again. “Hungry still? Can you give me the big sad eyes?”

You want me to beg you.. While im a rabbit.. For food!? When is this going to end…

You sighed low, moved your front paws together so they overlapped, lowered your ears till they touched your back and gave Draco the biggest, saddest eyes you could do, you even added in a lip quiver.

“Thaaaats my good Rabbit, my good girl.” he held out the whole carrot and you took it into the pocket nibbling like crazy.

“Hes talking to his rabbit”

“Just.. just dont say anything…”

After lunch Draco decided to just stroll around the castle. He talked about himself mostly or his father. He had you up on his shoulder and was outside the castle just walking around. Everyone he passed either gave him a look or asked about his companion. If they were not Slytherin he did not even look at them. But if they were of his House he would tell them he had a special class assignment and had to drag a rat around all day. Every now and then he would nuzzle his cheek on you while he walked, hands in his pockets, smile on his face, head in the clouds.

“Ya know Rabbit, this is the best day i've had in a long time i think. Its a lot less tiring than making hell for that Gryffindor kid. How bout you Pet? Good day?” he looked at you nuzzling you again.

I cannot…. Begin to explain how awful this is… i'm not your little accessory. Its your lackey's fault i'm stuck like this. I think you are a - wah!

Draco brought you to his chest to hold you as he sat down near a small river with flowers next to it. He had one leg up and placed you between them to scratch your chin. “Want a little treat for being so good?” he leaned over picking a flower, holding it down to you.

Are you kidding me…

“No? Cmon love, cheers”

You thumped a foot opening your mouth for him to place the little dandelion in. “good little Rabbit, tasty?”

You swallowed the flower whole with wide eyes. It is good.. You got out of his lap to hop to the flowers munching another and another making Draco laugh to himself. “Well i guess so Pet.” he watched you munch on a few flowers for awhile, leaning back on his hands. “Rabbit” he said.

What now… You turned to him with your ears back.

“Come to me,” he pat his lap. “Cmon, right here”

Im not a damn dog.. You hopped over between his legs again and he scratched your back in long strokes.Ugn dooonttt.. Il fall asleep again … Your little body slouched over his thigh and you nuzzled your face into his crotch closing your eyes.

“Must be the sweet spot yeah?” he glided his fingers down then up your fuzzy back watching your back legs kick out from under you. You were getting sleepy all over again. Dammit why.. Just stay… aw..aw...awak...e…

“If only you would let me do this when your human.” you heard him say.

Wait what? What did he say just now? Your nose wiggled and you laid your chin on his crotch staring up at him.

“What? I told you i dont know how to change you back” he spat out looking away.

Maybe,, pretend to sleep…

You nuzzled your face back into his crotch closing your eyes and Draco laid his head on his knee watching you.

“Those fucking two trying to touch you, i dont know what came over me. Your mine, Little Rabbit. No one can touch you, no one can have you, no one can take you away from me. Not your stupid House, not the teachers, no one. Youll stay loyal to me wont you? Thats what Hufflepuff is. My loyal little Rabbit.”

What.. what does this mean?does he plan to keep me with him after graduation?! You wiggled around and Draco scooped you up laying down with you on his chest. You looked scared to him. Draco scratched your head and you scooted closer to his face putting a foot on his chin.

“Yes little Rabbit?”

I dont understand you.. Why are you being so soft right now.. All the time your mean and cruel to me but today… i dont understand. Is this all a trick to get me to fall for you? Mess with my head?

Draco pouted his lips at you. “Hmm? Give us a kiss, Pet” he fake whimpered.

I swear when im changed….

You moved your foot getting closer to nuzzle his face. Draco smiled pulling you closer and closing his eyes. “Good little Rabbit.” he dozed off holding you.

I could leave… find help.. Your body felt weird all of a sudden. Whats going on ? im floating?! Draco!! Draco!!! You struggled in the air watching Draco get farther and farther away. You floated back inside the castle and up some stairs to a open door where a man was waving his wand around directing you. He had long blond hair and looked very curious. You knew who he was the instant he put you on his desk.

His hand cupped your chin giving him a good look at you. Your squeezing too tight.. Please.. It hurts..

“Black and yellow eyes,. A Hufflepuff student.” he stroked your back in long hard strokes while he talked. “How did my son come across you? I wonder? I think ill hold onto you, he should realize soon enough..”

Lucious Malfoy… anyone but him… Malfoy was tolerable.. But his father… please come find me Draco…….and soon.

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA FIC PROMPTS

A collection of all of the fic ideas from that ask game, as of now. I’ll throw in new ones if i get any and when I remember. Feel free to use any of them, I’d love a link if you did!

with hands to the sky, I beg (what will save us?)

Izuku is a god who asks to be reborn as a human to try and help. He is warned he can’t return to being a god and will join the mortal realm, ever reincarnated. He agrees.

Izuku is a child with faint memories of a life he never lived, who knows too much about the world but not enough about the people around him. He’s not listed as having a quirk but he’s never gotten sick, never been hurt. He scares the other children and the adults don’t like his precocious nature. Inko loves her little miracle.

 My Soul is Like a Supernova

Things happen around Izuku. Always have. Everything from earthquakes and villain attacks to miraculous healing and lottery wins. He’s always attracted big events like this - as if even the universe can see how important he is and it warps itself around him.

He sees this as perfectly normal. 1A is begining to notice a stressful pattern.

This one regret of mine

Character study of Inko and how she deeply regrets so many things she’s done in her life, from her husband, to giving up on her carrier, to telling Izuku he couldn’t be a hero and then letting him keep going to UA.

But no matter what she’d never regret her son.

Of souls and lost causes

A good ol’ Izuku sees dead people AU, focused more on his younger years when he’d wander around the city helping as many spirits as he could, only to return home at the end of the day exhausted and dirty to an increasingly worried mother who believed the doctor when he said seeing ghosts as a quirk would be impossible.

my life.your choice

Underground heroics AU (i dont think ive ever posted that au huh): Izuku is the well-known son of japan’s immortal emperor, All for One. Born quirkless, he’s been emotionally abused but violently protected his whole life by his father, his mother killed before his eyes for trying to take him away. He’s never been able to make a choice for himself save for his bodyguard - his childhood friend, Bakugo Katsuki.

Katsuki made a pledge to protect him when they were in kindergarten and he’ll be damned if he breaks it now. And if it takes the two of them joining the resistance, meeting a vigilante by the name of All Might thought long dead and Izuku receiving a near-mythical quirk? Well, that just makes it more exciting, doesn’t it?

I forgot that you existed

Izuku gets hit with a quirk that not only makes people forget him, it prevents them from seeing him as well - all but erasing him from reality for everyone he knows. He can still interact with things but all it manages to do is just UA shut down under fear of villain infiltration. They find Izuku 18 hours later when the quirk wears off - a motion tracking gun trained on his forehead.

certain uncertainties

No one can predict the quirks trapped in One for All or when they’ll show up. Anthology fic of Izuku discovering each of them, some being rather helpful, and at least one piece of merch being sent into a low orbit.

Sometimes goodbye is a second chance

Set in the same universe I wrote console reset in; during the two heroes movie: they never defeat Nine and he slaughters the whole island and his class, leaving Izuku till last. He comes back at the start of their first day on the island and doggedly makes friends with every islander he can because while it hurt seeming them die, it hurt even more knowing he’d never even learnt most of their names.

They win this time the first time they meet him, even if it’s a marathon fight of 8 hours with him and Bakugo doggedly wearing him down. No one dies. Izuku thinks it’s worth dying as many times as he has to to keep the people he loves smiling.

The immortality of the heroic spirit

One of the quirks in One for All is determination: if you have something you desperately want to do, you can’t die - no matter how much blood you lose or home many pieces your body is crushed into - you’ll just heal back to where you were before you died. All Might and Aizawa find this out to horrifying effect during a brutal villain fight they are stuck watching on the news with the rest of a terrified UA.

In hindsight this makes a lot of sense to Izuku. Aizawa wants to scream. All Might has coughed up more blood than is probably healthy and all of 1A bruised hands from where they were clutching each other’s when it got too tense.

Shine on you invincible legacy

Izuku becomes a top 10 hero before hes even out of high school, hitting No.2 the second he graduates and taking No.1 from Hawks literally the next time the ranking is counted. 1A will not stop throwing him parties each time he moves up in the ranking, even if in 3rd year it was every other week. All Might comes to ever one of them.

Shake the Dirt from Your Shoes

Izuku will be a hero and no one will stop him - an AU a fair bit like the beginning of canon except Izuku fights back, remains unending optimistic and maybe engages in a light bit of technically legal vigilantism, accidentally befriending a vast array of heroes and a student or two.

To his horror, they recognise him out of costume as soon as he speaks to them, resulting in a very eventful first day at UA.

do you feel with a heart of steel

Original Sin AU, young Izuku finding feeling emotions difficult and not knowing why. He finds a dying animal on the way home and sits with it, patting it until it passes away. He doesn’t think he feels anything, but his cheeks feel wet.

all you want is milk and honey

Villains have been trying to use Izuku his entire life, much to his annoyance and confusion (I wonder who in his family might make him known to villains? hm). He’s gotten very good at being intimidating, even as a child.

When he gets kidnapped with Bakugo on a primary school field trip he decides to hell with it and breaks out all the stops. Turns out villains don’t tend to want a 10-year-old who can describe in great detail how they would hang you with your own intestines.

Bakugo decides that fuck Izuku being quirkless, he’s kind of amazing.

Even the stars

Izuku dies young and no one but the stars cry for him. They bring him back, but his body is cold and he has a nova burning where his heart should be. A four-year-old who has known death and walked among the stars is a terrifying thing. His skin has a shimmer to it, his eyes look like planets with no visible pupil, and he knows far too much.

The stars still speak to him, and they see everything.

bitter dreams and optimistic nightmares

Bakugo and Izuku grow up good friends, until Izuku is taken by villains age 9.

Bakugo’s determined to be a hero to save Izuku, even if it hurts to be at UA without him.

Izuku hates hurting people but he’s determined to make the most of his horrible situation by leaking information to heroes whenever he can. He’s given to All for One to serve as a lab hand to the doctor when All for One finds out this rag tag outpost of his had been hiding a valuable resource.

They meet at the USJ.

Mind Games for Two Shinsou and Izuku are both gen ed students in the same class, but with Shinsou stubbornly refusing to make friends and Izuku being the vice president they are almost strangers. UA has a no quirkless students policy and Shinsou has accidentally discovered that he student in his class with an analysis quirk, doesn’t, actually, have one. Izuku is aware Shinsou knows. They both want to get into the hero course but are under the impression there is only one spot.

It’s tense.

The Melody Stuck in My Soul

Izuku has an empathy/emotional control quirk that hears other’s emotions like music. He uses this both to read people, to defend himself, and, because hes Izuku, to ramp up his adrenaline/motivation/anger to kick ass. He and Bakugo are friends because baby Bakugo was lowkey impressed Izuku managed to weaponize his tears.

Advantage of the musical element: it gives him something concrete to latch on to and change, and it was very easy to work out which emotions were which. Also he has his own theme song, even if he’s the only one who can hear it.

Disadvantage: He cant turn it off. The stronger the emotion the ‘louder’ the music (it doesn’t cover up natural sounds because its not technically there, you get me?)

Error 404, childhood not found

A Hero’s Son AU, snapshot’s of Izuku’s childhood with No.1 Hero All for One as his abusive father.

Age 4 when his quirk never comes in and All for One abandons all pretences of loving him. Age 6 when he realises his son is intelligent and has a use as a lab assistant for the doctor. Age 8 when Bakugo first realises something is wrong. Age 9 when his father is almost killed by the No.1 villain All Might. Age 9 when he’s made to work in the labs with the doctor.

Age 14 when he meets All Might. Age 15 when he makes it into UA.

Darkness Growing (The Light Ever Smaller)

Villains take over Japan after the current arc, leaving all heroes and students that don’t switch sides on the run. 1A is instantly separated with a few of them  being killed, most of the living students with Aizawa and Izuku and Bakugo by themselves, both too stubborn to leave the other.

Aizawa is desperately trying to get to Izuku and Bakugo in an attempt to keep them safe, while the two of them are avoiding Aizawa to keep the rest of their class safe(er), all while avoiding the villains, turncoat heroes and police out to get them. Public support is spotty at best with anyone found ‘harboring a criminal’ given the same punishment as the hero.

Lost soul of last hope

The first wielder has been Izuku’s imaginary friend since he can remember. He’s not very imaginary.

Featuring Izuku with the world’s strangest older brother, Inko coming to the realisation her son can see a ghost, but only one ghost and no one will believe them, Izuku’s quirk being listed as Inko’s because the first wielder can help him fake it, and Izuku wondering why first looks so much like that picture of his father on his mother’s bedside table.

The kids the system failed

100% The 1A run aways au with 1A, Aizawa and Mic being runaways kids of various ages that band together to stay alive and maybe do a little vigilante work on the side.

Izuku has All for One and uses it like you’d expect a traumatised kid to - cautiously at first but when he gets the hang of it there are suddenly no more criminals with quirks in their area, and it looks suspiciously like Uraraka can fly.

Just a second to soon? For the Fic thing?

Aizawa struggles and gets knocked out just before Shigaraki lunges at Tsuyu. She and Izuku are left horribly injured by his quirk with massive facial scarring, and in Tsuyu’s case, the loss of an eye.

Daze

An illusion/fear quirk makes his teachers look like villains and convinces him he’s in danger. They try and stop him without hurting him but it’s difficult considering Izuku is convinced he’s protecting his friends, considering he can only see them broken and bloodied with villains he thought were locked away loaming over them.

Even as Aizawa cuts out his quirk Izuku still tries to shield his friends, snarling ferally.

Morning Glories and Forget-me-nots

A memory quirk of unknown duration hits Izuku, leaving him remembering none of his life. 1A starts to fall apart without one of their pillar’s.

hopeless but not broken

The Long Con au where Izuku asks All Might if he could be a hero without a quirk - he’s really asking if he can stop pretending to be a villain, if he’s worth anything without the quirks he’s been given, if he’s worth something as himself rather than the limited use he can provide. He doesn’t know how to say all of that, so he just asks if he could be a hero.

All Might says no. And Izuku basically decides right then that the only way he’ll ever be able to help people is by being a mole for the heroes like he’s been since he was 10 - that he isn’t worth anything because he’s quirkless and to be considered just as valuable as the people around him are he needs to give his life and more.

He shows up to the bar crying because of All Might and Shigaraki moves his murder plot forward a few months.

Sunflowers and Summer Gardens

All Might starts a garden on campus and 1A like to help. He uses it as a nice place to chill and as physical therapy. He likes to give the different classes bunches of flowers when they sprout.

For Dos and For Donts

Izuku runs into some of his old bullies when out with some of his friends. Uraraka, Iida, Todoroki, Shinsou and Asui intimidate the fuck out of them, and Izuku realises hes not scared of them any more. Then they get frozen yoghurt!

your mistakes, my unbecoming

Aizawa assigns a project on quirk related issues, Izuku ends up with quirkless discrimination, Aizawa assumes his discomfort is just him being upset he doesn’t get to talk about quirks. He doesn’t realise his mistake until he finds Izuku dissociating on the roof.

one and one into the vast

Original Sin AU, All for One and Izuku seeing the vestiges together. One for All sees his brother for the first time and Izuku learns a lot about the voice in his head.

All for One has a mini-crisis about his not son learning he’s a horrific villain, especially considering he has the power to cast his soul out at any time, killing him at will. Izuku doesn’t kill him. He admits its probably not right of him to let AfO remain considering the things he’s done, but All for One is a part of him now and it would be like killing a friend.

All for One quietly decides to hold off on the villainy until all of 1A is dead, for Izuku’s sake.

between the stars of our souls

Izuku and All Might are old gods who keep getting reborn into human forms with their memories regained when they turn 4. Normally finding each other takes a while, and their last reincarnation they never found each other, so this time he resolves to make himself as easy to find as possible, all while saving as many people as he can.

Izuku, aged 4, memories fresh in his head, makes it his mission to get into contact with the man he knows is his father/mentor’s reincarnation. All Might’s agency was not expecting a 4 year old to repeatedly try breaking in to their office, and they especially weren’t expecting him to be so good at it.

you really should have thought this through

Different (and ill-advised) attempts at special moves or team up combo moves. Featuring:

Izuku managing to break Kirishima’s nose.

Uraraka sending Bakugo so high he broke the sound barrier coming back down to earth.

Kaminari and Shouto managing to electrify ice.

Izuku, Todoroki and Bakugo levelling a whole suburb (at least it was condemned???)

I'll Break Anything You Give Me

Different times Izuku desperately tried to repair his relationship with Izuku over the years and the one time Bakugo fully grasps how much he fucked up and reaches out his hand to try to fix it for the first time. Probably includes a lot of screaming, Bakugo learning how to say sorry, a field trip and them having a conversation on Aldera’s roof.

Sinking

One for All kind of possesses Izuku during a quiet night at the dorms. One for All, made of 8 people, 7 of which are dead and had their last experiences in life be rather painful and violent, breaks down, Izuku alone not enough to drown them out. They lash out at anyone who tries to touch them, their quirks tearing Izuku’s body apart.

All Might’s vestige reaches out a hand to Izuku to keep his mind from being torn apart as 1A set about both trying to protect Izuku and get Aizawa who was off campus on patrol.

Feat. Bakugo and All Might being the only people with any idea about what’s going on and getting more and more stressed each second that passes. Iida, Uraraka and Todoroki being good heroes and even better friends. Blood King deciding he’s never watching 1A for Aizawa again, and Aizawa deciding he’s never leaving 1A alone ever again.

A Long Way From Home

Shirakumo wakes up in Kurogiri’s body in Tartarus with only shadowed memories of his time as a villain. He’s scared and alone and he just wants to see his friends again, even if he’s scared they hate him because at least that’s something he knows.

Too Far Gone

The other side AU, it comes out Izuku is a villain with (knockoff) All for One and he has a showdown with Mirio. He and Izuku trained together under All Might and Mirio tries to plead with him but Izuku has to basically tell him to go to hell to not ruin his placet as crown prince of the underworld.

Of course, he’s not only doing this to save people, he’s also doing it with All Might’s blessing - taking over from All Might himself serving as a villain after he killed All for One to prevent a power vacuum.

Doesn’t mean that his friends in 1A know that.

Snowy hills and sunlit peaks

Probably an AU about All Might being a mountain spirit with a little shrine that Izuku is the only one who visits - Izuku gets in trouble and All Might manifests himself, saves him, and tells everyone to keep their hands off his human son.

Wilting

Izuku gets sick and he tries to hide it because he’s scared its something serious but he just gets worse and worse. His friends are the ones who eventually step in and comfort him.

I’d probably write two endings with one being a bad end and the other a good end.

My wish came true without me realising 

Izuku wakes up one morning, comes downstairs and just starts crying. Everyone panics and he reassures them they are happy tears and that he's just glad to be here. They all call him sappy and give him a hug. Later in the day he and Bakugo chat and Izuku reveals he never even expected to live this long, let alone become a hero. Bakugo grumbles that he’s too stubborn to die, and not to get too cocky. Izuku promises he wont.

[violetnotez]

I am in serious need of soft hours headcanons with Izuku. I wanna pamper him with love, hold his cheeks and kiss him tenderly, hold his hands and draw circles on them with my thumb, hug him to my chest to cuddle him, pet his fluffy hair, just tell him how much I appreciate and believe in him. Forehead kisses, cheek kisses, nose kisses, ALL THE KISSES DAMN IT! 😭 I. APPRECIATE. THIS. CUTE. BROCOLI. BOY. Help me plz 😭 I mean, if you can 😂 I know you're very busy with matchups (btw kudos to those

OMG Im so sorry this was so much later! I was really need some good Izuku loving hours when I wrote this, so I hope you like it! Also sorry it was posted at an UNGODLY HOURS I cant have a normal posting scheudele no matter how hard I try!

ALSO I REALIZED U ASKED FOR HEADCANNONS IM SO SORRY!!!!!!!!!

Izuku x reader

⤷ Genre: Fluff

⤷ Word Count: 1600+

⤷ Warnings: cursing if ya squint

⤷ Synopsis:   You have been noticing Midoriya has been a little down lately, so you take it upon yourself to cheer him up by sneakily taking his favorite notebook and writing cute messages in his notes, and of course, his reaction is priceless!

This fic is for the @bnhabookclub bingo event!  Here’s my masterlist to see all my work for this event!

Bingo Slot: Doodles On Their Notebook

Your hands were frantically shoving through Midoriya’s things, the collection of All Might merchandise staring at you with piercing eyes as you continued with your search.

Being Izuku’s girlfriend, you pretty much knew Midoriya like the back of your hand. So when he wasn't acting like himself, becoming more sulky and training more, you knew something was seriously wrong with the greenette.

But of course, the green haired boy was determined to prove you wrong, always saying “Im just fine!” or “Dont worry about me angel!” whenever you brought the topic up.

It just- didnt feel right to you...he seemed so sad, so burdened with something inside of him, his green eyes no longer shining like they used to and his body looking as if it was carrying a tremendous weight on his shoulders.

You had decided enough was enough, and that you would remind your boyfriend of how amazing he was by writing affirmations all over his favorite notebook in order to uplift his spirits-if only you could find the damn thing.

“The hell is that book,” you cursed under your breath, your hands now lifting up every textbook on his desk.

“What book are you looking for puppy?”

You felt a spike of coldness rush through your body, your eyes wide as you turned around to look at your confused looking boyfriend.

His hair looked slightly wet, a towel folded underneath his arms and his signature white shirt a little damp from a shower he probably had taken after training. His cheeks were still a little pink, making his freckles a little more prominent, and in any other circumstance you would have pounced on him with kisses from his cuteness.

But-he had just caught you red handed, looking through his stuff...the hell were you gonna get out of this?

“I-uh,” you stumbled out, trying to find a good lie, “I-I lost a notebook, and I-I think it might be here? From when I came over to study?”

Izuku didnt seem to notice your obvious fluster, his eyes downcast and his expression preoccupied.

“I havent seen any of your notebooks lying around...I’ll look for it, dont worry! We’ll find it eventually,” the boy tried to send you a reassuring smile, but it didnt work very well. 

It was sad, tired, worried...just not the usually reassuring Izuku you knew.

All thoughts of your plan filtered out of your mind, your body instantly walking over to the boy. Your hand wrapped around his arm gingerly, some parts rougher than others from his scars as you gently trailed your hand down to rest in his palm.

“‘Zuku, are you feeling okay?” you asked, your voice sweet as you looked up at him with wide eyes. “Is something on your mind? You seem-sad,”

Midoriya sighed, his green orbs looking at you with love and warmth. 

Even if he was looking down, it was reassuring to know he still looked at you like that- at least it wasn't you who was causing this...but what?

“Im sorry puppy, I didn't realize I was worrying you so much,” he said, his voice low as he rubbed his thumb against your hand. “Its just-I-I feel like I'm not improving as much as I should be. I've had this power for some time now, and I can barely use it to half its potential...the others are improving so much, especially Kachan..I just- sometimes I can't help- but think that maybe I'm not cut out for this…”

You tilted your head in confusion, your lips pursed and eyes full of empathy.

You were so relieved to finally know what was eating at your boyfriend so much, but it hurt you to know he was fighting with such insecurities All you wanted to do was love the hell out of him right now and smother him with cuddles and kisses.

“Oh, ‘Zuku,” you sighed out, your free hand finding refuge against Midoriya’s cheek. The boy quietly nuzzled himself into your touch, his skin soft and warm against your palm. “Is that what was bothering you?”

“Yeah-I-I know, it seems silly, its just-”

“No, it doesnt,” you quickly interjected him, a reassuring smile playing on your lips. “Everybody doubts themselves sometimes, no matter how good or bad they are at what you do.

“You're still just training, you're doing everything you can to be the best, more than what most people do in their whole lifetime. Yeah, others are going to improve faster than you, and others are going to improve slower. Just focus on yourself, and your goals, and don't forget what you’ve accomplished. You done so much with yourself Izuku, more than you would ever know, just don't forget that kay?”

Izuku face light up, his expression washing with relief. He instantly buried you into a hug, his taught arms wrapping around you and squeezing you slightly. You smiled at the big softie your boyfriend was, your hands cuddling his body close to you. You felt the boy chuckle slightly, his voice sounding flustered yet more relaxed than before

“What would I do without you?” 

“Probably train until you passed out,” you giggled, a smile gracing your lips, “but seriously Izuku, dont be so hard on yourself, your doing just fine,”

“Okay, I-Ill try,” he stuttered out.

Izuku held you like that for another moment, you both relishing the feeling of the other against your arms. You felt Midoriya pull your body gently away from his, his face facing yours as he placed his hands on your shoulders.

He finally looked a little less solemn, some of the weight being taken off of his shoulders..but that tell tale look of sadness was still there.

“I-I know you were looking for your notebook...but did you maybe want to- stay for a little bit?”

You felt your insides light up from warmth, a grin growing on your face.

God, why did he have to go and be so cute?

“If you want cuddles, ‘Zuku, all you have to do is ask...”

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ

Deku stepped into class the next day, his body almost in a trance as he sat himself down at his usual seat.

Last night was healing for him, just cuddling and having you in his arms, but reality hit him in the face the next day. Those inner demons weren’t quite destroyed, and he realized he still had to battle them, even after the night with you.

He sighed, his shoulders feeling tired as he rummaged through his backpack, pulling out his notebook. 

Mind as well study as he waited for class to start…

He flipped through the first few pages, trying to find the last place he was reviewing, until he noticed something-there was new writing, unlike his own, scrawled in the empty gaps of his notes..

Izuku cocked his eyebrow, his fingers dragging against the message:

“I love how sweet you are, no matter what comes your way.”

Izuku felt his cheeks rise with heat-who wrote that?

He flipped the next page, finding another message:

“Your freckles are adorable and I’d kiss each and every one if I could.”

God, how could these make him so flustered? He felt his whole face rise in heat, beginning to recognize the handwriting as your own. He began to flip through each page, a message almost on every one, all about him:

“You are so strong.”

“I love when you get flustered.”

“Your going to accomplish your dreams and more,”

“Your hair is so cute pls dont ever change it,”

He chuckles at that last one, his digits racking through his locks. His classmates were beginning to file into class, the room becoming much louder than before.

Izuku turned around, his cheeks on fire as he hoped nobody saw him get so flustered-until his eyes met yours.

You were currently talking to Mina and Kaminari a few seats behind, your body sitting on a desk as you watched Izuku with waiting eyes.

Once he made eye contact though, he knew for certain it was you who had written the sweet notes in his notebook- your face lit up with relief, a smile gracing your lips as you sent a wink his way.

Midoriya couldn't help but let a squeak slip out of his lips, his body swiveling around quickly- god, he was too flustered around you!

Midoriya heard Aizawa enter, all his classmated quickly taking their seats and going silent.

He listened to the instruction, opening his notebook to a fresh page to write down notes...but he found himself flipping back to those few pages, rereading every message. It uplifted his spirits, made him feel loved, and he felt so lucky to have someone as caring as you love him back.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ

It was now the end of class, the bell ringing daintily around the room as everyone bombarded out to the lunch hall.

You on the other hand stayed behind, walking over to Midoriya as he slowly put his books away in his bag.

“So, did you like it?” you asked, a smile in your voice as you waited for your answer.

Midoriya looked up at you, his eyes wide with gratitude and his cheeks a rosy red-

Yeah, he liked it.

MIdoriya smiled, his grin wide and child-like. “I-I loved it, y/n, thank you!” he shouted, his voice dripping with gratitude.

“God,” you giggled sheepishly, “I took me forever to find that notebook after you fell asleep…”

His hand wracked into his hair again, his bright smile turning into a nervous smile

“Honestly, I don't know if I deserved all that work, but I-I really liked it-”

“Of course you deserve it Izuku!” you quickly reached for his hand, your body moving closer to his, “You are such an amazing person-everything I wrote in there was true, and will always be true.”

Izuku looked up at you, his eyes full of love and admiration. He had never been so grateful and felt so lucky to be with someone as amazing as you.

Midoriya’s cheeks began to turn red again, his body leaning in quickly towards yours. He planted a kiss on your cheeks, his skin leaving a lasting tingle on your skin.

“You know I-I love you-right...cause I do, I really really do,”

[probably-writing-x]

It had to be you.

Guzmán x Reader

Request by anon: I love your writings, I was wondering if I could request a guzman x reader where lu constantly ambushes the reader cause she knows guzman is in love with the reader and then guzman and lu end up breaking up cause he finally chooses the reader. Something within those lines, hope it’s not so much of a hassle! Keep writing ❤️❤️

Gif is not my own

Requests are open 🤍

“Guzmán, can you focus please?” Lu snaps her hand in front of him, “Or at least listen to me for a minute?”

“I’m sorry, but I have bigger things to worry about than your petty drama with your family,” Guzmán sighs, shaking a hand over his hair. 

“Are you kidding me?” Lu scoffs, “So you ignore me all weekend and then you act like I’m a pain for talking to you about my life?” She reaches up and fixes the lapels of his jacket. 

“I’ll talk to you later, Lu,” He pushes his hands away from her, grabbing his bag from where it was at his feet and hurrying to catch up with the person he’d been waiting for. 

You’re walking down the corridor at a pace quick enough to just about make it to class in time. 

“Hey, (Y/n), you doing okay?” He asks, tapping you on the shoulder. 

“Oh, hey Guzmán,” You smile, “I’m okay, are you?”

“Good. Do you have my notes from Chemistry? I need them for first period,” He comments, slinging his bag over one shoulder.

“Yeah, shit, um, thank you for those. I really appreciate it,” You nod, grabbing them from your things and handing them back to him, “you’re a lifesaver.”

“Are you kidding?” He laughs, “It’s the least I could do.”

He steps aside to let you into the class first and follows close behind you. You two hadn’t ever spent much time together before recent times but you’d found something in him that you hadn’t expected. You’d always been at Las Encinas but tried your best to keep yourself out of the typical group in your year. That was until everything happened with Marina, and Guzmán went through the type of loss he could never prepare himself for. You, in fact, had some experience in the area - after losing your brother only two years before. When Guzmán had confided in you, you’d found it impossible to say no to him, he was like a completely different person. 

“Hey, I was actually going to ask you,” He stops you yet again, scratching the back of his neck, “Are you free again tonight?”

“Yeah, sure, usual spot?” You smile, “I’ll see you later.”

“(Y/n)! Looks like you can get more conversation out of him than his own girlfriend can,” Lu speaks up, walking into the class with a smirk plastered across her face. 

“We’re just talking Lu,” You sigh, setting down your books and sitting in your designated chair.

“And what could be so important that it’s got him so occupied at the minute?” Lu scoffs, “Because honey, I don’t think you’ve had much interest in your life for the past seventeen years.”

“Lu, stay out of it. This has nothing to do with you,” Guzmán snaps, glaring at her before offering you an apologetic smile. 

“Nothing to do with me?” Lu laughs, “Fucking hell Guzmán, you’re spending more time with the fucking introvert than you are with your own girlfriend!”

“Lu, not now. I’m sorry (Y/n).”

You shake your head as means of dismissing his concern as he follows her back to their seats, ignoring her advances as she settles a hand on his thigh. 

You’d never intended on getting close to Guzmán and getting in the way of his and Lu’s relationship - you’d never tried to flirt with him or cause any problems. But apparently that just came with association.

- - - - - -

As you’re leaving school that day, you’re stopped before you can reach the car, as Lu grabs your arm and turns you to face her.

“Okay, darling,” She beams, glancing over her shoulders before turning to you with a deathly glare, “What’s going on with you and Guzmán?”

“Nothing Lu, it’s nothing,” You sigh, trying to push her off.

“Nothing? Then what’s with all the secrecy? Why do I see you together all the time? You were never interested in stealing my boyfriend before.”

You push her hand off, “And I’m still not interested in stealing anything or anyone. Maybe you need to think about being there for your boyfriend and supporting him instead of concerning yourself in matters that don’t mean anything.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“And I think that’s the problem, darling,” You roll your eyes, walking the rest of the way to the car and leaving her stood with a vacant stare in your direction.

It was true. She was so caught up in you that she’d completely forgotten about Guzmán in this whole situation.

- - - - - -

“Alright, I got your favourite this time,” Guzmán grins as he climbs the ladder up to the top of the bell tower and sets down some cans of drink, “And... I got snacks too.”

“Wow, you treat me so well,” You joke, “Try not to eat all the pretzels this time though.”

He shuffles on the wooden floor to sit beside you and lean back against the bench behind your backs, “Hey, listen, I’m sorry about Lu.”

“Oh, no, that’s okay,” You shake your head, “It’s not your fault. And I can see why she’d be jealous, I guess.”

He scoffs, “I don’t think she can stand the idea of me spending any time with anybody but her. I don’t even remember the last time we had a real conversation, that wasn’t about her or school or some petty drama she wants to involve herself in.”

“But she cares about you, that’s at least something,” You point out, “And she’s attractive.”

Guzmán laughs, “I used to think that was enough, maybe it’s only recently that I’ve realised it isn’t.”

You sit in silence with him for a moment as you ponder the thought. You didn’t like the idea of him wanting to change his whole life based on the few months you’d spent knowing him. But damn did you love the idea of being the one who he loved.

“I really appreciate you being here for me recently, I guess I sort of threw all of this onto you,” Guzmán smiles sincerely.

“Oh don’t be ridiculous, you’ve helped me just as much as I’ve helped you. Losing a sibling isn’t easy, and it’s even harder to go through that alone - whatever I can do to help you, you know that,” You assure him, “Besides, you always bring decent food.”

He chuckles, “A lot has changed in a few months, huh?”

“It doesn’t have to change much Guzmán. I know you’ve changed ever since you lost Marina, but Lu is there for you. She might not seem like it sometimes but it’s clear, even in her ambushing me, she does seriously care about you. She loves you, and she’s always there,” You point out, “There’s no reason why that should change.”

“No reason, yeah?” He smirks a little, “If you say so (Y/l/n).”

- - - - - -

The following day, you’re once again minding your own business at school. You’d spent the morning with Nadia revising for an exam and were now sat by one of the window seats reading up on some literature for class.

“Spending the evening with my boyfriend and you seriously want to tell me that nothing’s going on?” Lu’s voice sounds loud and clear from across the corridor, “You bitch!”

You glance up and set the book aside, sighing as you turn to focus on her.

“Who do you think you are? Walking around like you’re so innocent, so nice - when really all you want to do is to take what’s mine.”

“That’s not what’s happening Lu, even though I know it looks that way. I get it. But that’s not the case,” You shake your head, “Guzmán... he just needs help, support.”

“And you don’t think I can give that to him?”

“No, not at all. I think you’re more than capable. But sometimes you need to speak to someone who gets it, who’s been through it. And that’s what it’s like for us - you dont know what it feels like to lose someone like that Lu.”

She looks down at her feet, “I think in the process of you being his knight in shining armour, he’s started realising he doesn’t love me anymore. Maybe he never did.”

“I don’t know if that’s the case, or if it ever will be. But you’re playing a game that I don’t want to play. I never wanted to get between you and Guzmán, I never meant for any of this. I’m sorry Lu, but I was just being a good friend to him - anything that changed with you two wasn’t my doing.”

You collect your things and step past her, heading down the corridor quickly to avoid the stares in your direction. You’re only stopped as Guzman’s hand holds your arm.

“Hey, what’s going on? Everything okay?” He frowns, glancing momentarily at the people around, “Why’s everybody staring at you?”

“I’m sorry Guzmán, I cant do this anymore. I’m not getting involved in your whole whatever-this-is between you and Lu. Helping you out wasn’t supposed to destroy your relationship in the process, and it certainly wasn’t meant to make me your girlfriend’s worst enemy,” You shake your head, “I’m sorry but I can’t do it.”

You pull away from him and leave him dumbfounded in the middle of the corridor, swallowing the lump in his throat as he watches you walk away. God, that was never his intention. He’d just found someone in you that listened, that understood, that engaged with him when he spoke about Marina. Amongst that, he’d found someone that he’d always been missing when he saw you. He found someone funny, honest, caring, intelligent, and so certain of her future that she near enough convinced him that he could be successful too. He didn’t want to hurt Lu. But the pull he felt towards you was too powerful to ignore.

“Lu,” He quickly blurts out as he sees her storming past, “I think we need to talk.”

- - - - - -

“Well, I think this is the most we’ve spoken in a long time,” Lu scoffs as she sits down beside him on the bench, “Do you want to explain yourself Guzmán?”

“You need to stop being so harsh on (Y/n), none of this is her fault.”

“None of this? None of her spending every day with my boyfriend behind my back and knowing more about him than I do at the minute?” She scoffs, “Don’t act like she’s so innocent.”

“It’s not like that Lu,” Guzmán tuts, “She’s... she’s been there for me.”

“And I’m not?”

“No, no, you are. But (Y/n)... she understands. She can sympathise and relate to how I’ve been feeling. She’s helped me deal with losing Marina in a much better way than I would’ve done.”

“I don’t get it Guzmán. You barely spoke to the girl before this.”

“Exactly! I mean she’s been at school with us for years but it felt like I barely knew her. There’s so much more to her than I’d ever expected,” Guzmán smiles fondly, “She’s complex and sh-“

“I get the idea,” Lu rolls her eyes, “Why couldn’t you just tell me?”

Guzmán pauses. Why didn’t he just tell her? Tell her that he was seeking help, that he was doing it for the right reasons. He could’ve explained himself and explained that they were just friends. Instead, he sat here now with every intention of ending things with Lu.

“You like her, don’t you?” Lu states, “I know that look, it’s the same one you used to give me.”

“I never meant for any of this Lu,” Guzmán shakes his head, “But I’m different when I’m around (Y/n)... I can’t explain it but I like who I am when I’m with her.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself, it’s the same way I feel about you. And deep down I know you’ve never felt that way with me.”

“Lu...”

“Go, go and find her. We both know you want to.”

- - - - - -

You weren’t exactly sure why you’d come back to the bell tower, maybe because you partially hoped that Guzmán would still find you here. It was a weird mix of hoping to never get involved in his life again and also wanting nothing more than for what Lu said to be true.

Just then, you hear the sound of the hatch opening as Guzmán ascends the ladder and pushes himself up.

“Hey,” He says in relief as he sees you, “I hoped you’d be here.”

“Did you bring food?”

He laughs and shakes his head, “I have to talk to you (Y/n).”

You shuffle to make room for him beside you as he sits down, both of you silent as you look out at the sun in preparation to set.

“I spoke to Lu,” He states after some time, “I think we both needed to clear up a few things.”

“Yeah? Are you two back to being okay now?”

“Not exactly,” He laughs, “Or maybe just a different definition of okay.”

You look at him and frown, trying to keep composure as your heart ran at double speed.

“I never meant for any of this, and I certainly never meant to hurt Lu in the process. When I first spoke to you about Marina, it was because you’d been the first person to come up to me at school and tell me you were there if I needed to talk - and I believed you. When we first met here, it was because I wanted to know how you’d managed to cope with that feeling that was still so new to me. I was terrified of never being able to really deal with losing her, and you made it seem so clear.”

You swallow thickly.

“Somewhere, along the way, I found someone in you that went deeper than just how supportive you’d been. You were so much more than I’d ever seen,” He smiles and lets out a little chuckle, “You’ve made me some sort of romantic, clearly.”

“Guzmán...” You sigh, “I can’t get in the way of you and Lu. You know what she’s like.”

“Right, I do. And I know when I spoke to her today, it was like we’d both come to the same realisation. I needed to find you to realise the way that I’d never feel about her,” He shakes his head, “You make everything seem clearer (Y/n).”

You smile a little as he reaches over for your hand.

“There was never a choice to make (Y/n).”

[wreckofawriter]

Focus

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Ravenclaw!reader

Warnings: Slight swearing, bullying

Word count: 4,728 (this is the longest one I've ever written)

Request: Hey do you think you could do a Draco imagine? I was thinking with a ravenclaw reader who’s actually shy and clumsy.

A/n: Sorry this came out later than I anticipated, its regents week for me and I was crushed by exams. I hope to have part one of my Draco series out over the weekend. Hope you guys like this ridiculously long one!

“Ms. y/l/n” You heard an all too familiar voice say.

“Yes Professor?” You asked turning around swiftly to face the raven haired teacher.

“What happened with your potion, it was a complete disaster?” The teacher asked.

You flushed, it was no secret you weren't exactly great at positions, you were too clumsy to measure anything out, you managed to cut your finger and you always messes up the order of ingredients.

“I'm so sorry professor i'm just not very good at positions. I have been studying I swear, it just..” Your voice trailed off. “I'm sorry professor.” You mumbled looking down.

“I want you prepared for the test next Wednesday, you should be able to manage that?” He asked eyebrows raised.

“Of course professor.” You mumbled still quite flush from the whole conversation. You turned to leave walking back towards your common room. About thirty seconds later you saw the last person you wanted to. Mckenzie Clarkson. She was a fellow housemate who unfortunately was extremely popular, pretty, nimble footed and of course, smart. She was basically everything you weren't, in your mind.

“God your pathetic.” The brunett girl laughed, her stunning green eyes narrowing. “You have lost, what was it? 30 points for us today.” The girls behind her giggled whispering things to each other. “You shouldnt even be in Ravenclaw. Your far to stupid. You cant even get into the common room without help, you trip over your own feet and you are practically failing all your classes.” She smirked clearly feeling very good about herself, as you willed yourself not to cry. You hated crying, so you just glared up at her anger rushing through you like a wave, but you kept it down, what could you possibly say to her?

“Can you just let me go?” You asked voice weak.

“I don't know can we?” The hallway erupted in laughter.

“Just let me leave.” You said voice a bit stronger now as your anger grew.

“Fine.” She smirked as she moved out of the way. You quickly began to walk through the group of girls, the embarrassment was suffocating.

Just as you were about to break free of the group, a girl stuck he leg out sending you sprawling to the ground. Your hands, full of books that scattered as you attempted to get your arms in front of you, it was a failure and you landed on your elbow directly followed by you face. You groaned in pain as you felt blood begin to seep from your nose.

“Oops.” The girl giggled before they all turned to leave laughing and joking.

You lay there for a few seconds squeezing your eyes shut, begging the tears to retreat. You eventually pushed yourself up so you were sitting. You were surrounded by books and papers, you had blood rushing down your face dripping onto you shirt and you had had enough. You simply pulled yourself to the side of the hallway drawing your knees to you cest and began to cry. You knew this wouldn't stop. You were far too shy to say anything and even if you weren't the girls were right anyway. Why were you in Ravenclaw when it took you a good twenty minutes just to figure out the password to your own common room?

Just then your heard voices. You quickly moved grabbing your books and sprinting out of the hallway before anyone could see you. You sprinted the whole way back to the tower. You were greeted by the raven statue you had grown to hate. You groaned loudly.

The statue spoke, “How is it possible for you to stand behind your father while he is standing behind you?” it asked, making you groan again.

“Can you please just let me in, im covered in blood.” You grumbled knowing that it wouldn’t answer. You tried to think. How can I stand behind something that is behind me? You racked your brain for an awnser but it seemed impossible. You couldnt help it you began to cry again. Frustration, embarrassment and sadness filled you as tears streaked you cheek. Why were you put in Ravenclaw? What could that stupid, good for nothing, hat possibly seen in you that made him shout “Ravenclaw” like a farmer yelling for his next sheep to slaughter.

You then heard footsteps beside you. You turned to see Cho Chang. She was in the year above you and was everything a Ravenclaw should have been, pretty, athletic, and of course wicked smart. You wanted to hate her for being so perfect but you couldn't.

“Hey,” She said softly, “I heard what Mckenzie did. That's messed up.” She attempted to sooth you.

“It doesn't matter.” You attempted to smile but it was more of a tight lipped grimace.

“She’s wrong you know.” Cho smiled.

You gave a half hearted laugh, “What could possibly make me a Ravenclaw?”

“So much y/n,” she said, “You are crazy good at Wizards Chess for one.”

“That’s just a stupid game.” You grumbled.

“No, it takes strategy and I've never seen a single person beat you.” She pointed out.

You blushed not used to getting praised.

“Also i've seen your artwork, its beautiful, absolutely stunning.” She smiled making you blush more.

“Thanks.” you mumbled.

“Look don't let one girl get you down.” She advised before asking the statute for the riddle. It answered and she stood there thinking for a second.

    “Oh!” she exclaimed, “Your standing back to back.”

    The statue spun open as you hit your forehead onto you stack of books making you stumble, barley catching yourself before you fell. You cursed yourself before ascending the stairs to your room. You had had enough humiliation for today.

    Draco rolled his eyes as Zambini told another terrible joke beside him, “What do you call a red head with no brains?’

    “I don't know, you with red hair?” Draco mocked.

    “Close but no.” the other boy snickered, “A weasley!” He erupted into laughter as they rounded the corner, heading to the common room.

    As they continued talking Draco felt something thump against his foot. He looked down to see a leather bound book which he had kicked a few feet in front of him. The platinum blonde raised his eyebrows before bending down to pick it up.

    “What the..” Balises voice trailed off.

    Draco looked up to see a small puddle of blood at the end of the quoridor.

    “Some idiot probably got hurt in potions or something.” Draco scoffed, though he was a bit confused. They continued walking being careful to avoid the blood. Draco's mind was quickly brought back to the book and he opened it to see what it was. What he saw stunned him.

    They were sketches. Not crappy sketches that was done by some kid, but damn good sketches. Most of them looked like they were for herbology. There were various plants with notes about them scribbled in messy handwriting in the margins, but every few pages there was something different. On the fifth page there was a drawing of a creature he didn't recognize. It was a black horse-like creature with big leathery looking wings. He wondered what it was. They had now arrived at the common room and Draco went directly to a couch sitting down on the black leather, continuing through the book. On the eleventh page there was a drawing of a broom stick. It was read Nimbus 2000 at the handel. There were various other sketches of random objects littered throughout the pages of plants and each was extremely realistic. His thoughts were interrupted by Daphne and Pansy.

    “Did you draw those Malfoy?” Daphne asked plucking the book out of his hand ignoring his protests.

    “No, could I have it back?” He asked glaring at the girl.

    Before she could respond Perkison interrupted, “Who’s is it Dracy?”

    “Don't call me Dracy” the boy groweld, “and I haven't the slightest idea.”

    “Oh, how did you get it?” Daphne asked.

    “I just found it, now give it back.” He stood up snatching the book up before retreating upstairs.

    “Who pissed in his cheerios?” Pansy grumbled plopping onto the couch.

    The next day you had herbology first period, you quite liked herbology you were good at it too. You loved how you could just sketch after you finished the drawing of the plants and of course you love your grade in the class. It made you feel less like a loser. Just a little less. When you plopped yourself into a seat next to a Ravenclaw boy named Casey. He was always very nice and often complimented you drawings. You would be lying if you said you didn't like him a little.

    After sitting down and greeting the boy you opened your bag to look for your sketchbook. It was nowhere to be found. What the heck? You thought as you searched through your bag with no luck. Then it struck you. You must have left it in the dungous yesterday. You cursed yourself quietly.

    “You okay?” Casey asked beside you.

    “Yeah I just lost my book,” You smiled at him blushing a bit.

    “Oh. I could help you look for it later if you want.” He offered.

    “O-oh I wouldn't want to bother you.” you blushed

    “It's no bother, I swear i want to help.” He smiled flashing a pearly set of straight teeth.

    “Ok, s-sounds good.” You stammered, you felt your face grow impossibly warmer.

    The lesson continues and you talked occasionally to Casey, you did your sketch on a piece of lined paper, you would transfer them when you found your notebook. After Herbologioy you and Casey headed down to the dungeons to look for your book. You had never really hung out with him out of class and it was nice. You were fighting a blush the whole time, you weren’t really one who interacted with attractive boys out of class.

    Draco began to make his way down to potions, he was still working through the drawings, there were many creatures he had never heard of before. It was odd, how had he never seen so many of these before? He was halfway through the dungeons when he heard giggling. It wasn't Pansy’s shriek, it was a soft quiet sound that made him think of the patter of rain on dewy grass. He turned the corner to see two figures in blue robes. One was a tall boy with dirty blond hair and deep brown eyes. Next to him was a y/h girl with y/h/l y/h/c hair that shone in the candle light. Her eyes were a stunning y/e/c that shared a soft yet sharp gaze with the world. He was taken aback. How had he never seen this girl before? They both looked at Draco expecting him to speak but he didn't, he simply kept walking brushing past the two, tucking the leather bound book back into his robes.

    As he walked away, he heard the boy mutter something to the girl, causing her to gasp and laugh,

    “Casey!” she scolded him

    “Oh come on y/n that was funny.” He teased back and Draco almost gasped in surprise. That was y/n? y/n y/l/n? No way. You were in his potions class and you never even spoke up, you were constantly messing up positions too. How was that girl the same one whose name he had grown deaf to Snape yelling? I didn't seem possible.

“Shot, I have to get to positions.” you told Casey glancing at your watch. He said goodbye as you walked quickly to your worst class. You were actually unusually excited, Luna one of your best friends had offered to help you out because you had the class together and she was quite good at potions. You entered the classroom quickly and found Lun, sitting next to the girl. As you waited for class to start you chatted about the different potions and what might be on the test.

“Wait for the dragons egg you have to turn it to powder first right?” you asked to see your friends gaze elss where.

“Dracos staring at you.” She said simply as if she hadn't just said an impossible sentence.

“What?” you asked turning around to meet a pair of silver eyes already on you. They quickly dodged away making you blush tremendously. “I saw him in the hallway eairler, and Casey made a stupid joke about him, hes probally plotting my death.” You sighed reality crashing on to you.

    “I don't think so.” Luna said in her usual dreamy tone.

    “What else would he be doing?” You murmured returning to your notes.

    Before Luna could answer Snape entered the room and you snapped your eyes to the front of the class.

    “It has come to my attention that many of you are getting nothing done in this class.” He stated harshly. You cringed this was not going to end well. “And because of that fact I have made a new seating chart,” You groaned, just when you were getting excited about positions.

    “Listen for your name and your partner,” He continued. “Parkinson, Belby. Goldstein, Crabbe. Greengrass, Lovegood.” You glanced at your friend who was as usual, smiling. You are happy for her as well, there were much worse partners to be had. “Corner, Zambini. Boot, Blustrode. Y/l/n, Malfoy.” The rest of the names went out of the window when you heard your partner. This was not going to be good, not good at all.

    When Draco heard your name called, then quickly followed by his he felt like he was going to throw up. And it wasn't because he knew you were probably going to botch whatever potion they made, it was because he wasn't sure if he could focus around you. He blushed madly and tried to think about something else. It's just a pretty girl you bloody idiot. He scolded himself. You just met her today, he reminded himself Well just realized she existed today. He was shaken out of his thoughts by Snape's voice.

“If you don't like your partner, too bad. Move together please.” Draco glanced over at y/n who was already packing up, Zambini moved from his seat apologizing to Draco for his partner and moved toward the back where Micheal was seated.

    He then saw you make your way over to him your cheeks a bit red, the same way they were when you were talking to that Casey boy in the hallway. He grimaced, how was he jealous of someone he had never spoken a word to? He then decided he would ignore every good quality you had and focus on the bad ones. That way it would be easier to pretend to hate you right?

    The second you sat down his plan failed. You smelt like vanilla and roses. He wanted to lean closer to you and inhale your addicting scent forever, but instead he moved over or so he couldn't breathe in your intoxicating fumes.  

    “Hi, i’m y/n.” You said sweetly sticking your hand out.

    “I know who you are.” Draco responded ignoring your hand and continuing to stare at the board, slouching in his seat.

    “Oh ok.” You murmured. He saw a small frown take over your soft pink lips and he felt angry for being its cause.

    Snape explained that you were to make a Confusing Concoction potion and told you you had till the end of class. The potion wasn't too complicated. You thought you might be able to get through this one.

    “I'll get the water you can work on the feathers.” Draco drawled trying not to get to close to you as he stood. You pretend not to notice.

    “Ok.” you nodded. You grabbed the feathers and began to separate the barbs from them. Not but two feathers in you yelped with pain as a barb pierced your thumb. You yanked it out hissing in pain as you saw blood drips from the wound. Draco who was now back and heating the water grimaced at the sound of your pain but refused to show that he cared.

    He sighed loudly, “Look you go clean up and I will finish the feathers.”

    “Thank you.” you whimpered walking towards a sink face red as the blood dripping from your hand.

    Draco let out a breath he didn't know he was holding after you walked past. He then sat down and began to work on the feathers. His fingers moved easily to separate the barbs from the stalk and he couldn't help but wonder how you had possible stuck yourself with one so quickly. He then heard a thump and an apology and looked up to see you stumbling back to your seat face a brilliant red as Millicent and Boot glared after you. He snickered a bit turning back to the feathers.

    Once you had most of the ingredients in you had to wait for 30 minutes for it to boil so Draco sat down and pulled out the book of drawings he had found.

    He was flipping through the pages again when he heard a gasp beside him. He looked up eyebrows raised.

    “Where did you find that?” You asked pointing at the book.

    “In the hallway.” He smirked, “Why do you care anyway?”

    “Because it's mine.” You whispered causing his cheeks to flush.

    “This is yours?” He asked surprise sewn into his voice.

    “Yes.” you nodded, “I lost it when..” your voice trailed off face growing red, “after potions.” you finished voice quiet.

    “You sure this is yours?” It came out harsher than Draco had intended but what could he do about it now?

    “Yes.” you breathed out face growing warmer. “It does have drawings in it, doesn't it?”

    “Well yeah but they are like, really good.” Only after he said it did he realise how it sounded. He instantly was filled with guilt as your face flashed with sadness and anger.

    “Yeah, well, they’re mine.” You grumbled voice quiet.

    “Here.” He handed the book to you, your hands brushed before you snatched the book away and he felt like he was going to burst at the feeling of your skin against his.

    Just then the timer on your position went off and the two of you continued to work.

    That's how it went for two weeks. You and Draco would share very few words as you worked together. Your grade did improve, but you were still quite prone to accidents and Draco rolled his eyes everytime. You went from being sad he didn't like you to being mad. He was always so rude. He would avoid speaking to you, looking at you, hell he avoided you altogether, his seat was always poised at the other end of the desk as if you were some sort of plague. All of this made you angry and frustrated. What have you done to make you so repulsive? You knew you weren't the best at potions but you had only messes up three the whole time and you were improving. You had never been rude to the boy even once, how come he hated you so much?

    “I just don't get it.” You pouted turning to Casey who was walking you down to potions.

    “It's not your fault y/n, he's like that with everyone.” He explained, “He's just a dick, not much you can do about it.”

    “But maybe if I was better at potions the-” you were interrupted by Casey.

    “Y/n its not your fault, you are amazing and sweet and kind, it's just him okay? Don't let him make you doubt yourself.”

    You blushed furiously at his words, “Thanks Case.”

    “Plus if he's really pissing you off just blow a potion up in his face.” he jeered.

    You laughed loudly, “He'd probably kill me with his icy glare.” you teased.

    “He is always glaring at you.” Casey smiled.

    “Thanks for walking me.” You said.

    “Of course, i’ll see you around y/n.” He beamed.

    “See ya.” You said before entering the classroom. You were met with Draco's frozen glare.

    “Hello Malfoy.” You greeted.

    “Y/l/n” he responded his voice vacant of any emotion.

    You sat down and glanced at the board to see what position you were working on. You then looked at Draco who was already looking at you making you blush.

    “I'll get the water.” You said promptly before standing up and snatching a cauldron. Only when you did this you left foot got caught behind your right and you plummeted to the ground. You dropped the cauldron with a clang and you hit the ground. You instantly heard laughter erupted throughout the room and you felt tears well up in your eyes. You then heard a snicker and you didn't have to see his face to know it was Draco. You blinked furiously face a deep shade of crimson. You then pushed yourself off the ground, lifted the cauldron from a few feet away and turned to face the slytherin boy. Your shyness suddenly disappearing in your rage and embarrassment when you saw the everlasting smirk perched on his lips. You felt two tears cascade down your red cheeks as you thrust the cauldron into his hands.

“Screw you Malfoy.” your voice trembled through gritted teeth. You then quickly left the classroom, laughter disappearing behind you. You made it maybe two cordors from the classroom when you saw Mckenzie. You instantly turned to run but were cut off by a few other girls already behind you.

“God y/n, such a clutz.” She snickered. “I think you belong in a physical therapy building not a wizarding school.”

You only whimpered feeling helpless and small.

“Boo-hoo poor, poor, y/n all alone.” She rubbed her eyes with her fists.”You do realize that Casey only hangs out with you because of a dare right?”

Your eyes widened in confusion.

“I made a dare that he couldn't get you to go out with him in a month and here we are, only two weeks in and you are practically drooling over him.”

You felt a sob leave your mouth. You wanted to say it wasn’t true but you knew it was. It sure as hell wasn’t a coincidence he asked to help you find your book the exact day she said she struck the deal with him. You felt angry. Sad. But most of all embarassed. You were always so embarrassed. Why where you always so fucking embarassed?!

“Guess I'll have to go out with him now that I told you about the bet” She smirked picking at her long blue nails.

“Of course.” You muttered tears falling of your chin.

“What's that?” Mckenzie smirked.

“Of course he would want to go out with you.” You began to sob and you saw Mckenzie’s smirk widen and your anger out did you.

“Of course, some douchebag like him would want to date a slutty bitch like you.” Anger dripped like poison from your voice. All of the laughter around you stopped as you felt yourself smile. You looked up through your tears to see Mkenzies mouth wide open in shock, her eyes wide in her sockets.

Anger took over her features and she pulled her wand from her robes with a shriek. “Stupify!” she shouted and you were sent sprawling backward. Your head hit the stone wall and black dots danced in your vision. You groaned closing your eyes but they popped back open when you heard another voice.

“Back off!” it yelled anger knit into its frame. You turned to see Draco heading strait at the girls. He whipped his wand once and suddenly Meckenzi flew into the air. She then dangled there like an invisible rope was tied to her ankle.

She shrieked for the girls below her to help but they just turned and ran fearful of the boy heading toward them. After the other girls disappeared Draco flicked his wand again and Mckenzie fell to the ground and began to cry.

“Get out of here before I do more than hex you.” You heard him growl.

The girl instantly stood up sobbing as she stumbled away. Draco's eyes softened when they landed on you.

“Are you alright?” he asked as he rushed over to you.

“What do you care Malfoy?” you mumbled attempting to get up only to stumble over your own feet and plummet to the ground, well you would have hit the ground if it wasn't for a pair of strong arms wrapping around you. You looked up at the blonde, his grey eyes were set on your lips and felt your heartbeat speed up to extremely high. Draco's face was now quite red as he helped you back to your feet.

“Why do you hate me?” the question rose from your lips before you could stop it. You flushed immediately after it left your mouth. Draco looked taken aback by the question.

“I don't hate you.” he stated.

“Don't lie to me. You avoid looking at me, you don't speak to me, hell you sit as far away from me as possible.” You paused looking at the boy, “I just want to know why.”

He laughed he actually laughed. What could possibly be funny right now? Was this all another joke? Did he really find your misery that funny. You flushed madly turning to leave.

“No wait love, don't leave.” Draco begged his laughter stopping abruptly.

You felt heat rush to your face at the nickname and turned around looking at the ground. Your gaze was turned upward when you felt a finger slowly lift your face upward. You had never blushed so much in your entire life.

“I don't hate you y/n. I would never hate you.” He smiled, not his usual smirk but a genuine smile and it made you go weak at the knees. “I don't think I could ever hate you.”

“Then why do you act like you do?” you asked, “Why do you avoid me? Why do you never talk to me, never look at me?”

He sighed, “I avoid you because whenever I get near you, I smell you. And it drives me crazy.” His hand caressed your cheek bone and you were pretty sure you face was on fire. “Your scent is beyond intoxicating. When I talk to you I lose track of everything else and I can only hear your voice echoing in my head.” He whispered, his minty breath danced across your face making you shudder. “And when I look at you, it's like the world disappears and it's only you standing there. Everytime I look at you I have to battle myself not to lean in and taste your lips.”

You stared at him. You couldn't breath, your It had been replaced with butterflies that were now fluting inside you madly. You were pretty sure this is what death felt like. But then something clicked inside you and your realized this wasn't death it was love.

“When it comes to you, I can focus on nothing else.” Dracos lips were so close you could feel them brush yours and you couldn't take it anymore. You grabbed the back of his head and smashed his lips onto yours.

You had never felt anything like it before, his lips danced on yours with grace you couldn't even begin to fathom. You felt his tongue slid across your lips and your eyes widened in surprise. You then shut them again opening your mouth a slight bit. You ran your hand threw his hair as he explored your mouth with his tongue pushing you up against the wall softly. You didn't want to break the kiss but you felt your lungs burn begging for air and you drew away from him.

You were both panting when you pulled apart. Your face was a bright red, your lips swollen, and hair disheveled but to Draco, you had never looked more beautiful.

“Merlin,” he gasped out, “I'm never going to focus again when I know you kiss like that.”

You flashed a brilliant red and giggled, Draco then decided he couldn't stop himself anymore, he pressed his lips against yours once again.

[starlithan]

I Promise

Part 3

Siren Jisung/ Reader(ft. Choi San ATEEZ)

Word Count:3540 words

Warnings: None

Summary: Han realizes that the amusement park is the last place he want to be, time is running out and he cant figure out what to do, meanwhile a certain someone comes to live with the both of you, and you bot get into a whole lot of trouble.

prev-----next

Part 3

Y/n’s POV:

“I changed my mind .. THIS is my favorite food from now on” Han  said as he munched on the last slice of cheesecake, I giggled “see I told you there are more tastier things then scrambled eggs” I said, chocolate from the cheesecakes was on the side of his lips, I took a tissue and wiped it off “you eat like a kid” I smiled and looked at him.

Too close, Y/n you're too close 

I get back and clear my throat “come on there are more things you need to see since you're here”, I said as I looked around.

Han ’s Pov:

She's so cute. I smiled and went back to finishing up my cheesecake.

“Ahhh right the amusement park every human has to go there, it's a must do” she said getting all excited “what's an amusement park?” I asked as I wiped my face with the so-called tissue “here let's go” she said as she held my hand and pulled me along, we both ran to wherever she was taking me.

“Y/n slow down, or did you forget I just learned how to walk” I said huffing as we stopped, “and you know how hard it was to learn-.. Wow”  I said as I looked at the big big…..things, this place was gigantic.

“I know right it's gigantic, come on we're gonna go to the haunted house first” she said as I nodded still in awe, “wait what's the haunted house?” I asked, does she wanna be possessed by ghosts or something, but luckily she read my mind “it's not real ghosts just people acting like ghosts so come on” she said as once again she drags me, well if there not real then that's okay, and personally how scary can they be, I mean sharks are more scarier than mere people

________________________________

I take my words back, People are scarier than sharks, “are you okay?” Y/n laughs as she pats my back , this is utterly embarrassing. I close my eyes and shake my head, “ice cream I'll go get some ice cream, you sit here” she said as she went to bring us some ice cream.

I close my eyes, why is my head hurting this much, the moment I open my eyes, I see tons of hearts glowing a fierce color of blue, everything else was black and white, I close my eyes again and slowly massage my temple “stop, stop” I whisper

Remember you only have 20 days till you turn back to a siren 

I hear a voice whisper in my head, my eyes shoot open and everything's fine, everything's back in color, I only have 20 days, I got to get started today.

_________________________________________

Y/n’s POV:

“One chocolate and one peach in a cone please” I said as the guy nodded, ‘what's the time?” I whispered as I took my phone out 

25 missed class from Minho Oppa 

Domed I’m domed, I sigh, was something wrong 

“Here you go one chocolate and one peach” the guy gave me my ice cream, and I thanked him and started to make my way to Han 

To be honest I'm happy Han ’s here, I'm having lots of fun, I smiled thinking about how he was scared as hell in the haunted house, I even didn't have a single episode of the migraine too 

“Here's your ice cream” I said as I handed him the peach one, he glanced at both “I want the chocolate one” he said

“Nope you're gonna try the peach one this time, trust me you're gonna love it” i said, he gave me a questioning look but took it in the end, I sat next to him “so how's your day in the human world going?’ I asked as I looked at the people passing by “well let me summarize that for you, on my first day I was attacked by a cat and a human both on the same day, on the second day I got to know that humans are more scarier than sharks, and that I'm afraid of heights” he said pouting and taking a huge bite of the ice cream.

I laughed with tears coming out of my eyes “first of all Darong thought you were fish and came on you did smell like it too and second San apologized and did give you his clothes that you are wearing at this very moment” I said, laughing “what's so funny?” he asked which made me laugh even more “your.. Haha...your face…” I laughed, he looked confused “is there something on my face” he asked, I shacked my head as a no.

“No your face expressions is soo cute” I said as  my laugh started to come to an end, his face started to go red, to which I stopped, I think he's getting more sick, I placed my hand on his forehead, his fever is getting higher and higher, he held my hand, and for a minute we just stared at each other, he does have beautiful eyes it like you can see the whole sea in them.

“Stupid” he said as he scoffed “come  on I'm hungry lets go home” he said as he got up and started to drag me with him, we just walked silently with the setting sun watching over us.

_______________________________

Han ’s POV:

We got home and I sat on the table directly. I needed a minute to collect my thoughts. I had little time but why do i feel like it's going the opposite way “do you wanna eat now?” Y/n asked standing on the opposite side of the table, I nodded to which she went to the fridge and started to take out some food.

“Here you go” she said after a few minutes, she placed a bowl of rice and some side dishes, I can't lie she's a pretty good cook. She sat in front of me, hands on the table, eyes on me “you're not gonna eat?” I asked, she shocked her head as no “I'm not hungry” I nodded and started to dig into my food, “hey Han I was wondering what's the.. You know what's the difference between a siren and a mermaid in general” she asked.

“Didn't I tell you the first time” I looked up, “well you weren't very specific I mean in detail” she said, “well some sirens are born from the sea, and some are born from violent, watery depths, Drowning, being murdered at sea, their bodies being thrown into the water shortly after their deaths, stuff like that. Thy are the ones that sing to sailors, or anyone and drag them to their deaths, when they get to close, They are born anytime, but that's just a myth in between sirens about that there born from violent deaths no one has seen a siren born like that” i said as i was reminded of the monster i was, the real me 

“On the other hand Mermaids are purely creatures of water, they look more like a fish then us, there dum most of them and aggressive too, even though if both of us die we turn into sea form, as if we never existed, mermaids eat human hearts thinking that that's what's gonna turn them into humans” i said getting back to my food, blocking out all the horrible thoughts.

“Was it hard?” my eyes shot up to her to see her heart was glowing a deep shade of blue 

She's sad 

I nodded, she bit her lip and nodded “if you-... if you wanna talk about it I'm always here” she said as she looked back up at me and smiled 

Beat… why is my heart beating so fast?

_________________________

Y/n POV:

“You should probably sleep” I said as I picked up Darong “and you and me need some sleep and Darong and Y/n time” I said and winked, to be honest Darong was super mad at me, “I mean your the one who used to ignore me” i pouted as she turned her head the other way”.

I got changed and picked up my phone, shit i forgot to call Minho, this is the best time I guess, I dialed his number

Beep beep~

“Hey Y/n” I heard Minho 

“Hey I'm sorry my phone was on silent” I said 

“It's fine just come to the living room you have so much to explain” he said and hung up

What does he mean by come to the- shit i close my eyes and run out of my room to see Minho giving death glares to Han , and Han  was doing the same, “Minho I-..” I started but he motioned me to stop “who are you?” he asked  looking Han  dead in the eye, Han  gave me a panicked look, I mouthed my friend “your my friend” I whispered, he nodded “I'm her cousin” , I facepalm myself, shit now we're in big trouble how am i gonna explain this one.

“Well I'm her brother” Minho smiled, to which I'm sure Han  understood that he messed up “so now Y/n explain pls”, I motioned Han  to sit down, as he did and then we began to explain the siren stuff.

“So you're trying to say You.. Han  right? Is a siren the ones that sing people to their deaths?” Minho asked and the both of us nodded “and how am I supposed to believe that?” he asked, I give a panicked look to Han , as he gets up and heads to the kitchen he picks up a glass and fills it with water and then heads back to us, he breaths and then puts his hand above the glass, for a moment we all sit there but nothing happens “what's going on, nothings happening, okay enough with the stories both of you tell me the truth” Minho says, but then water suddenly starts to levitate around his hand, me and Minho were in total awe “see I told you” I said as his eyes were stuck on the water now out of the glass and levitating above Han ’s hand, i look up at Han  and smile, he returns that smile with a wink.

“Fine I believe you”

_________________________

authors Pov:

After that everything was settled, you all went to sleep, but to be honest even though Minho now believed in Han  but it still looked like he was not giving him proper approval, but for the time being you were glad he was here.

Han ’s POV:

I'm glad I was half siren, for those powers to work, or damn I messed up, I lay on the couch my eyes on the roof, “you know if you do anything fishy to my sister I swear I'm gonna kill you and bury you so deep that even your own kind wont find you” her brother said as he lay his mattress on the floor, and went to sleep, back towards me, I sigh I mean I get it he’s her brother, it's good he's protective, who wont be she is something to protect, my thoughts start to kill me , I get up and head outside, slowly opening the door, but as I was opening the door I heard a small meow.

I glanced down to see the little monster rubbing against my feet “you want to go outside too?” I asked, more like I whispered, Darong gave a little meow, as I picked her up and we head outside, the cold night air, the cold lonely sea, to be honest I forgot the sea or being a siren when I spent time with her, I sit down on the sand and place darong in my lap, looking at the sea reminded me of my task, my heart sank to my feet “ugh I can't do it, am I falling for her?” I put my hands on my face, thinking of all the times she made my heart beat, “is this what love feels like, cuz I dont like it” I said as I stared at the sea, I took my necklace out of my shirt and inspected it, the vile was now half empty, “great I have little time left and I have zero progress, but what I'm feeling towards her is it love or something else?” I questioned myself, Darong meowed “and you, you little monster” I said as I picked her up and brought her to my eye level, she meowed and then licked my nose, I smiled “your not that bad” I said as I placed her back in my lap.

“We should probably go in , it's getting a little chilly out here” I said as me and Darong headed back in. but what do you know sleep wasn't quite welcoming me today I sat on the sofa, “what's something fun I could do here?” I whispered, I saw the thing that turns on the TV the… “what did Y/n say this was?.... Ahh right a remote and this button turns it on” I remembered it was actually the most complicated thing I got to learn, I turned it on and the volume was quite high, I gritted my teeth together and glanced at Minho Hyung, but he looked like he was having a deep sleep, I quickly turned down the volume, “sorry” I whispered, I started to surf through the channels until this one caught my eye.

“Are you a person who’s in love but can't seem to figure out whether it's love or friendship? Well today we will tell you some things that will help you figure out the difference, and point out how exactly you feel about that person”

Wow great these things always pop up on the worst time, I really didn't want to know this, but then again it won't hurt I guess, I looked down at Darong and she really looked interested in the show, wouldn't take her eyes of the screen “who do you have in your life to figure out your feelings” I laughed, but Darong straight  off ignored me.

“When someone likes you they usually give off small hints, but how to differentiate is that when you love someone 

1.You act like yourself in front of them

2.You can never get mad at them

3.Your always thinking about them 

4.You can talk to them endlessly without getting bored

5.You feel there pain, happy when there happy and sad when there sad

These are the main points, but you can also give “kiss” a try *wink*”

 “I think that's enough TV for me” I said as i turned it off, my face was heating up, this is stupid I won't do that, I sighed and lay down on the couch 

_________________

Y/n’s POV:

“Good morning!” I said as I went directly to the kitchen, hands occupied with tying up my hair, but as I looked up, I saw Minho with an apron, he looked at me and smiled, “sit down, and chill I've made us waffles your favorite” he said as he motioned me to sit on the seat, the aroma of sweat waffles filled the air around me and to be honest it reminded me of my childhood. “Where's Han ?” I asked, “here!” I heard Han  behind me, I turned around to look at Han , he was damped and not to mention semi naked, he wore only jeans, I'm kind of embarrassed to say I couldn't take my eyes off of his abs ‘how the heck do sirens have perfect abs, and why didn't I see this earlier?’, I heard hurried footsteps behind me, and then I felt someone covering my eyes, “HEY PUT ON SOME CLOTHES THIS ISN'T A STRIP HOUSE” Minho yelled as I laughed.

Finally we all settled down and had a peaceful breakfast, after finishing up we all cleaned up and thanked Minho for the lovely food, “oh yeah I'm gonna go do some work k, I'll be back by 9 okay” Minho said as he got to the door he stopped and looked back at Han  and gave him a long glare and then went outside, I laughed “wow that was intense” i said, as i was about to go to my room, Han pulled me by my arm and pinned me to the wall, we just stayed like that for a minute, my heart started to beat at an abnormal speed, “I-” I wanted to speak, to say something but my mind was blurry, my thoughts were blurry, I blinked twice, but Han  didn't say anything “can-can we go outside today” he said, and I blinked again trying to process what he meant. 

“Yeah yeah sure, umm give me five minutes” I said and the motioned for him to let me go, he quickly realized and pushed himself back, “yeah sorry” he said, hand on the back of his neck, I quickly went into my room and closed the door, “what was that, get a hold of your senses Lee Y/n!!” 

_________________________

Minho POV:

“Detective Minho your really on good terms huh buddy, I mean posted to Jeju, beautiful place and less crime, good for you buddy” I smiled as I heard Chan Hyung blabber on about how hard it is being a city detective, “oh come on Hyung it's not that hard, and plus I still have to deal with small crime, pickpocketing, car accidents and all”, I sighed looking at the now placed file on my desk, “don't be so unthankful those petty crimes are a piece of cake for us… by the way how is Y/n holding up, is here headache fine?” he asked as I hummed.

I stopped, as i thought about the fact that Y/n hasn't had a migraine since I got here “she's more carefree and happier these days” I said, thinking about all the times she's laughed, and how much happy she looks teaching Han  how to use the TV, smiling at the memory of that thought, “wow great that’s good I-.... In a minute… hey buddy I got to go okay got a new cold case” he said sighing frustrated, “okay” I laughed, “but hey tell Jeongin to not destroy my office and tell Changbin to stop arm wrestling with every newcomer” I said as Chan laughed “you know about that” 

“I have eyes and ears everywhere” I laughed and then we said our goodbyes.

In the middle of work I thought about the possibility of other mythical creatures existing if a Siren exists, I opened up the file, but when I read it I wanted to yeet everything.

____________________________

Han ’s POV:

We got home from our little stroll and let me say I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TO MAKE HER HEART RACE, she went straight to her room, and came back minutes later, with a camera, I suppose that's what you call it, “here I want you to have it” she said, as I took the camera and stared at it for a minute “what for?” I asked, “well I want you to make some memories for yourself, since your here now” she said, I smiled looking at the camera, “thanks” I said as she looked at me with wide eyes “I-I’m gonna go make us something to eat” she said as she hurried to the kitchen. 

I nodded as I went to my sofa and sat down, Darong meowed from the other room and as she saw me sitting she came running and I smiled, “hey little buddy” I smiled as I picked her up and run my hands through her hair she started  to slowly close her eyes and doze off, the smell of food was nice, less days I have less days left I thought as I looked at the ceiling.

“Ouch” I heard Y/n yelp in pain and then hiss, I don't know why but my body quickly reacted and I got up and ran to her, “what's wrong are you okay?” I asked as he help her finger in her hands, “yeah I'm fine I just cut my finger” she said as I took her finger in my hand and examined it, it wasn't a deep cut thank God but it was deep enough to bleed like hell “why didn't you pay more attention hun? What if this was deep what would we do?, does it hurt a lot?” I asked as I slowly picked her up and placed her on the kitchen counter, “where's the first aid?” I asked as she looked at me and then at the cupboard, “I- its t-there” she said and I quickly went to get it, I slowly started to clean up the wound, “you should be more careful, scared the hell out of me” I said as I took a bandage and wrapped it safely around the wound, her hand was now in mines and we both stared at each other, i really dont wanna kill her, I slowly start to close the gap , and placed my lips on her, I felt her stop and then she kissed me back.

I can't kill her

________________________________

[eremika-forever12]

|| Eremika Fanfic: Remember Me!? ||

This is basically continuation from Manga plot with some changes ....you will get to know as story progresses! Do read, share & comment!

Chapter : 1

Just like any day....the sun rose from East making the whole city glow from its heat!

Just like every day everyone is back to their own chores !

Since that day of the new history of Shinganshina or to be more accurate the new Paradis....where there is no more walls, no more eldians & marliyans hatred....it was more like a new Era....Everything has just changed!

People know more about the truth with No Memory Loss....No Misconception Of Titans & Their Existence....Cause Titans Are Just A History Now Which Kids In Their Schools Learn About Their Past Existance!

6 Years....

6 Years Since He Disappeared....Vanished Just Into The Thin Air Just Like That! Leaving her alone once again in this Cruel World! He is known as humanity's Biggest Enemy Now....Who was once recognised as Humanity's Only Hope! But Something Tells Her....His Decision Changed The Whole Prespective! He Actually Changed This World....United Them To Fight Against Him! Sacrificed Himself....For The Cause Of His Own People! No Matter In Which Way But He Succeeded...Even If It Is By Being Cold Hearted Mass Murderer....She knows he was The Saviour, He Was No Monster!

But.....The Sad Part Is He Just Disappeared Like That 6 Years Back After That Rumbling Ended!

No One Noticed Him Since Then Nor His Giantic Titanic Body!

Did he deceive her all again? After making her that promise of returning back alive....wrapping around her that piece of cloth...before going for that final battle against everyone....Did he just die like that after doing so much....not even once meeting her again! Is he actually dead? Where is he? Where is Eren Yeager?

Just like any day....Mikasa starts her day thinking about him....just when her thoughts broke off hearing the powerful scream of her son....shrieking the hell out of her!

“ MOOMMM “

“Ahhh....Heyyy....” says Mikasa shocked watching that little guy running to her hurriedly with a backpack in his hand.

“ MOMMMM! GETTT ME MY FOOD HURRY! I GOTTA BE LATE FOR MY SCHOOL IF YOU JUST KEEP ON SITTING LIKE THAT! I AM HUNGRY” says the little guy with his loud voice.

“ Hush! Cant you speak a bit normally? I mean whats with all these shouting! I am not deaf!” scowls Mikasa as she gets up from the dining table.

The boy simply shrugs- Look Mom! I have no time for this....Alright! I am HUNGGRRYYY!

Ah that pout....thinks Mikasa....his cute little pout always makes her heart melt....and those Green eyes...it just reminds her of him! Thinking about him makes her Sad again!

Mikasa brings a plate full of noodles as she pushes it slightly towards the little devil on the other side of dining table.

The little guy hungrily takes the spoon out of it as he starts rolling the strands of noodles in it....and hurriedly stuffs them in his mouth.

Mikasa stares at her little boy silently observing his every features....his antics were just completely like his dad. Mikasa sighs....only if he was here! Suddenly her eyes fell on a small bruise on his forhead...Mikasa frowned....

When did he got that! Damn....did he just again fight with someone in his school yesterday!

This boy will surely make her crazy....

Mikasa glares at the green eyed little boy who was busy in gulping down his glass of water without noticing his mother's furious glare!

Mikasa in serious tone- Eli.....Look at me!

Eli looks at his mother in confusion as he stops munching his food for a moment...

Eli mumbling – Yes Mom!

Mikasa scowls- What is with that scar on your head!

Eli gasps in shock as he looks else where but not in her eyes....he surely tried to hide that thing by bringing his most of the black hair upto his forehead so that his mother wont notice that scar!

Eli nervously while fidgeting a little as he speaks in his child like voice- Errmm...Its nothing...actually...I fell on the way while returning to home so I guess Got hurt a little!

Mikasa glares- Eli...Shut up! Dont dare you lie to me! Since you got admitted to the school...I have been receiving lots of complain due to your rude behaviour towards children! So dont give me that crap! Did you fight again with someone?

Eli glares back at his mother as he says raising his voice- Rude behaviour? I am not Rude! Its not my fault if those kids of my class bumps into me intentionally just to tease me ! I am not gonna keep my mouth shut if they taunts me by calling me Monster Baby! I am gonna punch their freaking ugly face for calling me that! I had enough of it! I am not weak or Something....

Mikasa scolds him as she raises her voice- Eli! Stop it! If they taunts you....its not necessary for you to reply them back! Stop being impulsive! You cant just beat up people if they tell you something! Learn to control yourself!

Eli tries to defend himself- But...

Mikasa holds his shoulders softly- Eli listen to me!

As Eli stares with his big green eyes, Mikasa with broken voice tells him- Punching someone or beating someone wont prove you strong! I know how it feels but you gonna get adjusted to this! You dont need to start a fight with someone if they say hateful words to you! I know you are strong Eli! But you need to control yourself! Your anger wont do any good....

Eli remains mum as he softly shrugs off his mother's hand....taking his back pack on his back.

Eli calmly- I am done with my breakfast! Bye Mom!

Before Mikasa could say anything, Eli runs out of the house way to his school while Mikasa just whispers watching him running away- Bye! Just dont fall into any trouble Eli! You are the only one I have! I have lost everything in my life....I dont want to loose you!

Mikasa stares at sky scattered with clouds and the sun rays with birds flying...

Mikasa murmers as lone tear escapes from her eyes- Eren....I Wish You Were Here!

***********

Eli has been walking merrily along the way towards his school when he hears someone calling him from behind....

Eli turns around and squeals in happiness seeing the blonde hair guy with that scout uniform- Uncle Arlert!

The blond guy walks hurriedly towards him as he laughs- Its Armin!

Eli rolls eyes- oh yeah its the same thing! Arlert is also your name anyways!

Armin giggle- oh well young man ! Off to school ha? Come I will take you there!

Eli with his head high- No need! I can walk to my school myself!

Armin nods his head gently- ofcourse you can! But I have to make sure you dont fall in any trouble you know....or else your mom will be worried!

Eli frowns as he chirps in his child voice- Wait Mom asked you to follow me!

Armin nods in negetive as he nervously says- No No....Not that lately she is being really worried about you! So I thought to have a check on you....

Eli yells angrily- Heyyyy! What the hell is wrong with everyone damn it! I am not a toddler or something! I dont need anyone! I can look out for myself! I am freaking 5 years! Leave me Alone uncle Arlert ! You have your own daughter....Just look after that pathetic princess of Yours!

Saying this....Eli ran off hurriedly before Armin could follow him any further.

Armin was shocked by his reaction! He wasnt expecting such outburst! He was not told by Mikasa to follow him....he just did it cause he felt he had some responsibility towards his best friend's son after what just happened a week back in his school!

But today this out burst....he just completely reminded of HIM!

It wasnt for first time....Eli was like this anyways since he was born....stubborn & pure brat with that pathetic anger of him but he usually doesnt talk like this with him....he is really fond of his uncle Arlert & his only friend Alina Arlert....his & Annie ‘s daughter! Yes They are no more titan shifters now! That power & the curse got ended 6 years back immediately after the rumbling! They were all normal now....

Alina is 4 now....a year younger than Eli...She still didnt get admission in school yet , most probably after she turns 5....she will also start going to school and accompany Eli too...

But well right now Armin is concerned about Eli sudden outburst....did he get into an argument with Mikasa again in morning! He seemed really pissed off hearing his mother’s name!

He needs to talk to Mikasa right now....

***********

Eli was breathing heavily as he stops mid way & looks back....damn his little legs are paining now! He just ran a marathon to escape from Armin.

Aaahhh He hates just being lectured every damn time! Nobody just understands him & his point of view! His mom only thinks him of as some brat who doesnt listen to her or something! What she doesnt understand is....Eli is just tired of this daily bully of him in school by calling him some monster's child, Titan baby, illegitimate kid etc etc ! When he tries to explain this to his mom....all she tells him to not react to them! Like how the hell....why wont he react to those carzy bunch of people who simply insults him! Eli's anger just rose thinking about all these! He realises...he just ran off bit too far from his school....in some empty area with less people walking around! The area has some broken houses all around....people dont live here now much! Duh he is in no mood to walk back to his school....missing a day at school wont be any harm ,thinks Eli.

He just notices a bench a bit far.....and walks towards it & sit down!

He wants to be alone from his mother's scoldings and lectures! Eli always wondered why he didnt have a father like every other kid! He has been numerous times taunted about this by some adults in their neighbours! They simply call him Titan Baby & he hate that Word Titan! He doesnt really know what are those but once he heard some students in school talking about it....Titans were some bad ugly creatures who used to be on this land some years back! And Eli understood he was simply called those ugly creature's kid....

Once he dared to ask his mother about his own dad....but didnt get any answer from her instead he made her sad for some unknown reasons. He hates his mom to be sad or to cry! Its true his mom is strict in many ways and over protective too but Eli loves his Mom very much....just only he wishes if only she understood his feelings! Since Eli never questioned his mom about his Dad whom he never met!

Eli was lost in his thoughts as he was swinging his small legs over the bench absent mindedly....when all of a sudden he felt some one was watching him from far....Eli’s eyes travelled up infront of him as he felt alert all of sudden....

He noticed a Silhouette infront of him......on the wall ahead of that old broken house...someone is standing behind HIM!

To be continued.....

Chapter : 2 - click here

[chocojjk]

Eggs

summary: badboy! changbin if you squint 

words: 7k

warnings: one mention of death by illness

a/n: this took way too long cause i got so lazy lmfao, slide into my inbox with prompts cause idk what to write after this 

not edited per usual, im lazy :(((

you and changbin lived in different worlds

changbin has always been the schools most notorious bad boy

along with his group, 3racha

he was the typical bad boy -- gets into fights, wears leather, barely shows up to class, etc.

after watching countless of rom-coms, you and i, reader, should know that bad boys like to keep to themselves

and they won't bother you unless you cross their territory, not at all different from changbin

someone bullies one of his friends???

you might as well run now , because he will be coming for your ass

he catches you talking shit?

you should probably say goodbye to your mouth and have a doctors appointment ready

the point im trying to make is that seo changbin does not take shit from anyone

which doesn't really matter at this point because everyone has learned to fear him

on the other hand, you're, what they say is a “good girl”

too caught up with your books and your grades, in the library 24/7, worrying too much about the future you envision

you stayed away from drama as much as possible, happy with the 2-3 friends that you have  

and,,,

well,,,

you probably saw this coming,, but just in case you didnt, ill say it

your two different worlds are about to collide

---------------

youve been searching for a little over 20 minutes to where he could be when you finally spotted him at the table all way in the back of the library

you let out the deepest sigh, you shouldve figured he would choose that table jfc

‘he really is sticking to his reputation’ you think to yourself as you made your way over to him

“hi, im y/n, i'm your tutor,” you say, giving him a soft smile

changbin doesn't even bother to reply to you as he got up and left

you were left standing there like,,,

what the fuck just happened ??

before you finally snapped out of your confused trance and chased after him

catching up to him you grab his arm, putting a complete halt to his movement

and suddenly the library was even quieter than it should be

every single eye in the room focused on the interaction that lies in front of them

the notorious bad boy and the goody two shoes,,, how incredibly cliche

he looks at you, his eyes dark and unreadable

the expression on his face was emotionless yet it felt like he was crushing you under his stare

finally noticing that your hand was still gripped around his arm, you quickly let go, letting out a small “ehem”

the tension in the air was thick, it felt like someone just put a dark cloud above your head and you couldn’t blow it away

god damn this was awkward

not even the good awkward where you can laugh about it later, this is the kind of awkward situation that hits you in the middle of the night and suddenly you're just cringing at every bad thing you have done in the past

“uhm, im suppose to tutor you,” you try to say confidently as soon as you found your voice, but really it was barely above a whisper

“maybe show up on time,” he says, his voice as dark and as strong as his aura

and with one final look at you, he walked out of there

you didnt bother anymore, you knew you were at fault

‘we’ll try again tomorrow,’ you think to yourself before your best friend, hyunjin walked up to you, pulling you outside the library  

“dude are you okay?”

“uhmm, why wouldn’t i be?”

“i just saw you talking to changbin”

“ok and ?”

“he’s bad news y/n,” your best friend says, warning you

“ i dont really have a choice hyunjin” you reply

you think back to 3 days ago when you were called to the principal's office

not gonna lie, you were shaking in your boots,, only bad kids get randomly sent to the principal's office

as you entered the room, Mrs. Seo was already waiting for you behind her desk

“hi ms. l/n, i dont think weve formally met,” she says, reaching out to shake your hand

“ its nice to meet you”

“ please, sit down, make yourself comfortable,” she continued, pointing to the seat right in front of her

sensing your nervousness she quickly added a, “don't worry, you're not in trouble”

phew

your brain was starting to hurt from trying to rack what you must have done wrong to be seated in the big office

“ why am i here then if you don't mind me asking?”

“ ah yes, i need you to tutor my son”

,,,,,

oh

(◎_◎;)

,,,

“umm, why me?”

“you're top 1 in the class, is there anyone better than you to do it?”

well,,, she wasn't wrong

you mentally pat yourself at the back for this, happy that your efforts were being noticed

“don't worry ms. l/n, if you succeed, i’ll make sure you get into any college that you desire “

‘pshhhh, im top 1 ms seo, i can do that on my own’ you think to yourself 

“....and fully paid for.”

well, shit , how can you say no to that offer

its literally free education right in your fingertips  

what's the catch??

“ you can do that?” you ask

“ of course. i know very important people. so what do you say?”

and after a few minutes of contemplating within yourself, you finally agreed

“ also, while you're at it, i want you to change my son's reputation.”

and there it is

“ i'm sorry?” you reply,, maybe you just misheard the fact that she literally asked you to change her son

“ i don't just want you to tutor him in english, i want you to make him a better person.”

“how do you expect me to do that?”

“be his friend. teach him the ways of life, i'm not always gonna be around to get him out of trouble. You're a smart girl ms. l/n you'll figure it out.”

without giving you a final say, she ushered you out of there but not before she added

“ one last thing ms. l/n, dont tell anyone about this.”

the way she said it was so scary, and its like a spell was casted on you and you could only utter out an

“ of course mam”

i guess from her standpoint, she made sense

“ i just dont understand why Mrs. Seo chose you out of all the people”

“ we’ve already gon over this hyunjin”

“ yeah yeah, its cause youre the smartest of the class-”

hyunjin continues to talk however you’ve tuned him out as your eyes went to focus on changbin, himself

greeting the rest of his friends, an actual smile on his face, much different from the changbin you encountered a couple minutes ago

he gets up on his motorcycle and was about ready to put his helmet on when he felt someone staring at him ( i told yall, tYpiCAl bad boy )

he whips his head around in quick search for the culprit

and for the second time that day, you found yourself looking in the dark brown eyes of the the one and only, seo changbin

his smile quickly disappearing once he found your eyes

putting on his helmet whilst still maintaining the eye contact, he quickly drove away and you can't help but continue to just watch his figure retreat to the size of a dot until he was completely away from your line of vision

the next day - friday

you were in the library, seated in the table changbin used the day before

unlike yesterday, you were there dummy early

exactly 30 minutes before the actual tutoring session

he wasn't going to get away this time

finally , the chair across from you gets occupied, a backpack loudly flopping its way unto the table

he doesn't say a word,

he doesn't even look at you

he just sits there, staring at the table between you guys

“uhm, i think we got on the wrong foot yesterday, im y/n”

you say, a wide smile on your face, trying to change the atmosphere

he scoffs at this

‘omyfuckinggod who does he think he is’

‘im gonna fucking murder this kid’

‘his mom was right when he said he needed to change’

as much as you wanted to just punch him in the face, you plastered a small smile on your face instead

“should we start?” you continue

“i guess”

for the next hour, you learn that changbin doesn’t even need tutoring

he was definitely smarter than he lead on

he knew the answer to every single question you asked and didnt even seem like he was trying 

“uhmm, changbin can i ask you something?”

he just nods at you, urging you to go on

“are you failing your class on purpose?”

and with that he stands up, giving you a small smirk, “i think this session is over,”

“i-okay- i-i’ll see you on monday!” you say even though he was already a good 5 feet away from you  

-----------

as you laid in your bed that night, you wondered why the boy chose to fail his class

but no matter what scenario you could think of, you just cant understand it

is this what privileged people do ?

they know that they can get away with anything so they dont even try ?

‘aish, why am i thinking about him,’

‘y/n stop it’

‘ahhhhh’

you tried forcing yourself to sleep, to completely shut off all thoughts

but damn that stupid smirk on his face just keeps reappearing

and with that you slapped your pillow unto your face, not at all excited for the days to come

saturday night - 9 pm

to be honest, you weren't the type to go out on a saturday night

however you stayed in bed the whole day binging your netflix shows that you completely forgot to run your errands

so now you're here, at the local supermarket, buying your weekly groceries

you may be asking why can't your parents just do it?

well,,,

you only live with your mom, and she was very busy running the night shift at the hospital + picking up extra shifts

so she's really never home 

and when she is, she crashes right to sleep, exhausted from work

so ever since two years ago, when you turned 16, this has been the life that you were used to

you weren't complaining of course, she was only working to provide for you and your future

the least you could do is help around the house

after a good 7 minutes, you finally gathered everything that you needed

eggs, check

bread, check

peanut butter, check

a bag of hot cheetos,,,, check check and check

you nodded, proud of yourself for finishing it so fast and made your way to your car until a loud crash stops you from doing so

the next thing you know, you were being dragged into the alleyway

“1!!!!1111! I- get off of me,” you say thrashing and kicking, trying to get away

‘oh god, im gonna die tonight,’

‘if there is a god out there,, pls,,, not tonight’

‘i haven't finished my netflix series yet,, plssss’

however your thoughts were cut short when your captor whispered, “shhh, its changbin”

changbin??

chaNgbIN???

chANGBIN???

he finally turns you around, making you face him

“play along if you don't want to get hurt,”

and in one quick motion, his lips were on yours,,,

seo changbin was kissing you

your eyes open, stunned at what was happening

and then you noticed it...5 men walking around the area

and hoping that you've watched the right dramas, you pieced together what you think is happening

leading you to closing your eyes and kissing him back

which honestly caught changbin off guard, “good girls” dont react this way???

but he’d never let you know that, as he pulled you closer to him,

his arms snaking  around your waist

your hands going around his neck, the grocery bag being forgotten

yall were full on making out now

too caught up with each other’s taste to even notice the 5 guys leaving

(((im really bad at writing these kinds of scenes jfc, this sounds awkward as hell pls just picture it)))

until finally after like 23823 years, you pulled away, trying to catch your breath

damn, that kiss was good

probably the best one you’ve ever had

what????

just cause you're a goody-two-shoes doesn't mean you haven't been kissed before okay,,, were not going THAT cliche

he slowly lets go of you, his eyes darting to the grocery bag on the ground

“your eggs are broken,” he says

“m-my eggs?”, you reply, still on cloud nine,

following his gaze, you snapped out of your daze

“oh, r-right, my eggs,” you say softly, a frown making its way upon your face

changbin grabs your hand, pulling you towards the grocery store

“what are you doing?”

as usual, he doesn’t reply

honestly, you should be used to this by now

he dashes around the supermarket

you were right behind him, trying to keep up with his fast paced speed

finally, he gets to his location, the egg aisle

“which one do you want?”

“what?”

“eggs, which one?” he replies

“uhm, you don't have to, i can ju-”

“i'm not doing this for you,” he replies, cutting you off

you looked at him , not knowing what he meant

‘if he wasn't doing it for me then who the fuck is he buying these eggs for, i don't see anyone else here’

sensing your dumbness he grabbed a carton of the most expensive eggs and made his way to the cashier, pulling you along  

and you don't know why, or what has gotten into you, but all you could do was watch and follow

“here. were even now.” he says, before walking away, leaving you in front of the grocery store, holding a carton of eggs

monday

and now we’re back to the start of the week

which means another week of tutoring

as you waited for changbin to show up at the usual spot, you can’t help but think back to two nights ago

the feeling of his lips against yours all a distant memory yet at the same time, one that you could still remember clearly

“hey,” changbin says, breaking you out of your thoughts

“hi?” you reply, confused as to why he even greeted you in the first place

you guys do the usual, read a couple of flash cards, learn new words blah blah blah and all that boring crap that you learn in a high school English class

at one point you guys find yourself just sat in silence, and you can’t help but ask the question that’s been on your mind since Saturday night

“so who were those guys?”

“doesn’t concern you”

“uhm, the fact that you had your tongue down my mouth says otherwise,”

changbin was shocked, he wasn’t used to people responding to him the way you just did

don’t you know who he is???

he gives you one of his signature smirks, regaining his composure

“you liked my tongue being down your throat,” he says teasingly

o_O

＜(。_。)＞

excuse me what

is he flirting with you ??

what’s happening ??

“who said I did?” you say mimicking his tone, not allowing yourself to back down of this conversation

after Saturday night you told yourself that you were never going to just watch and follow

if you didn’t want the damn egg, you should’ve said something, you were so disappointed in yourself

you had your own brain, you can make your own decisions

besides you were here to be in control over him, not the other way around

“oh cmon, you’re really gonna try to refute it??” he says, the stupid smirk still evident on his stupid face

god, how you wish you could just smack it off

with your mouth

wait, who said that???

“you enjoyed it just as much as I did,” you say, knowing that if you answer then he would stop

and you were right, he completely shut his mouth and let the silence envelop you once again

“they were kids from another school,”

you look up at him, shocked that he actually answered

“why were they looking for you?”

“I may have keyed their car,” he says chuckling

“Because?”

“Isn’t that enough questions y/n?”

y/n

that was the first time he’s ever said your name

and you weren’t gonna lie, you liked how it sounded

“sorry”

“it’s fine”

“i don’t want to question it but why are you being so nice?”

“you helped me out without questioning me which means you trust me. im just returning the favor.”

“so, what im hearing is , you trust me?”

<(￣︶￣)>

“don’t make me have to say it out loud”

trust

you don’t know how you did it so quickly,

maybe the gods are at your side, but you finally got thE seo changbin to trust you

2  weeks later

you’ve been tutoring changbin just the same

same time

same table

same library

however, so much has changed

mostly the dynamic of your guys’ relationship

it was like he was a totally different person

like I said before, changbin was smart

but in these last couple of days, you realized just how smart he actually was,

he can honestly probably give you a run for your money

and because of this, your past tutoring sessions have ended up with you guys just laughing and joking around

weird, right ?

changbin and laughing ?

who would’ve thought ??

even onlookers were surprised

and everytime changbin laughed at one of your guys’ silly antics, you swear you can hear a pin drop

the whole room just becomes silent

at first, it bothered you how people were just listening in to your conversation, obviously judging the scene

but as the days went by and it seemed that changbin could care less, you started not caring either

and if you were being completely honest, you looked forward to spending time with him

when changbin was with you, it was just you and changbin, nothing else

he somehow manages to make you forget about reality

“lets ditch tutoring sessions today,” he says as soon as he took the seat next to you

“changbin, no”

“c’mon y/n, live a little”

“excuse you! I do have a life!”

“making out with your homework and watching Netflix shows 24/7 is not a life”

“okAy, now you’re just being mean,” you say, pouting at him

“im not being mean, I’m being honest,”

“yeAH and?? no one asked for your honesty,”

changbin laughs at this

lately he found himself laughing more

and for once, he didn’t mind it

you were doing something to him

and he liked it

“cmon, I’m not taking no for an answer,” he says, packing up your things

you sigh in defeat

you know that once changbin sets his mind to something, there's no changing it

so here you are, standing in front of an abandoned music building

“uhhhh, what are we doing here?”

“have you ever trespassed before?” he replies, a smug smile on his face

“nu-uh nope, no way in hell changbin!” you say, your attempt to stop this from happening

however, changbin was already making his way towards the door, completely breaking the lock

aannnndd

he was inside  

“c’mon y/n,” he says reaching out his hand to yours

even though all you need to do is take two steps forward and you're officially a criminal

you were scared shitless

what happens if you get caught omg

almost like he was reading your mind, he quickly says, “y/n, ive been here over a million times and ive never gotten caught,”

“i dont know changbin”

“hm, thats too bad, i wanted to share a secret with you,” he says, a hint of playfulness in his voice before he stepped out of the building and made his way towards his motorcycle

but of course,,,

you being a nosy bitch

“wait,”

“yes?”

“lets go inside”

you guys enter the building, the rooms getting darker and darker the deeper you go (this building is huge okAY)

if you weren't shitting your pants before, you definitely are now 

an abandoned building???

and its dark???

youve seen this in every scary movie out there

it never goes well

“uhm changbin,” you whisper, as you guys continue to walk

“hm”

“i-um can i hold your hand? im scared and - actually you know what its fine its dumb you dont hav-”

but before you can even finish your sentence, his hand were already laced around yours, providing you the comfort and security that you were looking for

you shut your mouth after that, just letting changbin lead the way

passing by so many rooms, each one looking the same as the other, it was starting to feel like a maze

however , changbin seemed to know exactly where to go

‘I guess he has been here over a million times’ you thought to yourself

“were here,” he says, opening the door and letting go of your hands as he reached out for the lights

not gonna lie, you were missing the way his hand felt around yours but thats not the time to think about that

“a music room?” you asked, clearly puzzled

“yeah, you might not know this about me but i can spit barsss,” he says, letting out chuckle

“eyE”

“you dont believe me huh”

“absolutely not”

“ok, watch this”

and with that he entered the recording booth, of course not after he pressed a bunch of buttons

honestly , you have no idea what he’s doing

but as soon as he put the headphones on

*cue any 3racha song because im too indecisive to choose one*

he was,,

indeed,,,

spitting bars

you could not believe your ears

who the fuck is this

you stood there, stunned at the fact the he was rapping about real shit and not something stupid and meaningless (rip wow, she is meaNinGFUL to me okAY)

after he finished rapping, the room was absolute silent

changbin felt dumb, he thought you were gonna praise him but there you were not uttering a single word,

he need you to say something ,anything,, hell, you can even laugh

he’d prefer anything over the silence  

he’s literally the ‘i just showed u my dick pls respond’ meme but its like ‘i showed u my talent pls validate me’

avoiding to make eye contact with you, he walks out of the recording booth

sitting on the couch against the wall, he finally breaks the silence

“so yeah, thats a song my friends and i wrote, its stupid-”

“its not stupid.” you say quickly

“oh?”

“since when where you into this?” you ask, curiosity filling your eyes, taking the seat right next to him

“what do you mean? music?? everyone’s into music y/n” changbin retorts, not wanting to go into detail

“hhhh, you know what i mean changbin,”

changbin doesnt know why

but he wanted to share this side of him with you

maybe because you were the first person that he has ever allowed himself to be close with

or maybe it was because you stuck around him for this long, no one, besides chan and jisung were able to do that

whatever it was, he wants to keep you by his side

he figured that showing you his true self would do just that

so after having a battle with his inner thoughts, he finally says

“my dad was really into this stuff, he taught me everything i know,” changbin beamed

“oh! thats really cool, do you still make music with him?” you say, genuinely interested, youve never really heard about his dad before

“uhmm, hes not really around for me to do that,”

aaaannd,,, thats why,, god reader smh

“oh, im sorry,” you say softly, mentally slapping yourself

“no its okay, you didnt know….he passed away when i was 11”

“what happened?,,,, y-you dont have to tell me if you dont want to,” you quickly added

“I want to,” changbin says, reassuring you

“he just,,, he just died in his sleep, apparently it was a stroke,” sighing, he looked up at the ceiling, trying to hold back his tears

“you must miss him,” you say, your voice still soft

for the first time since youve met changbin, he resembled a piece of glass

so fragile

he was giving you a piece of him, letting you see clearly a part of who he was

and all you wanna do is make sure that you won’t break that piece

“he built this studio...wanted to start his own music company,” he continued as you sat there just listening to him

“my mom hates it though, she stopped funding this place as soon as she can,”

oh

the mention of his mom suddenly brought you back to the deal that you have made 2 weeks ago

and god, you felt guilty

you were here, trying to change him, when nothing should be changed

sure seo changbin had a bad reputation but he is not bad

he’s just protective is all

to be honest, he was one of the kindest, gentlest soul you have met

“i promised myself that i would continue our dream, for him and me, but mostly for him,”

“i-is that why youre failing your classes?” you ask, everything finally piecing together

“huh?”

“you dont care about school because you already know what you want to do...where you want to be”

“hm, you truly are a smart girl y/n,” he says before nodding and flashing you a smile

those words

so similar to the ones his mom has given you

but this time you weren't in the mood to pat yourself in the back

because shit, this is thE dumbest thing you've ever done in your life

after hearing this, you made up your mind, you werent gonna partake in this deal anymore

if you were really as smart as everyone says, you can get into the school you want without any problem

sure it won't be free, but your mom aint working her ass off during her nightly shifts for nothing

and so, right when you go to school tomorrow, you were determined to end it

you’d still tutor changbin, you just won't accept any of the perks that came along with it

“thank you for sharing this with me,” you say genuinely, a smile creeping unto your face

“thank you for caring enough to listen,” changbin replies, his smile getting wider

and then it hits you,

“wait, so you mean to tell me that this is YOUR studio all along??”

and at this changbin lets out the loudest laugh

and you can't help but mirror his actions

1 week later

oof, that time jump, i thought you were gonna end it the next day reader

welp,,

you work hard, but somehow satan, aka the author, works harder

Mrs. Seo had to leave for two weeks, attending board meetings around the country, and whatever principals do,,, i'm too lazy to research what they actually do  

╥﹏╥

and so you spent another week, with seo changbin by your side

one week down, another to go

and when that day comes, you can finally freely hang out with him without all the guilt eating you up

this week you guys even hung out outside of the library

you’ve been with him so much, even your friends have started to notice it

“y/n, are you coming with us to the movies,” felix asks

“oh,, umm sorry guys, i cant,”

“who else are you gonna be with? i thought we were your only friends,” minho pointed out, a pout on his face  

“with changbin of course,” hyunjin hissed, obviously upset that you have been pushing them to the side  

“ i can hang out with anyone that i want,” you argued, really not having any of his attitude 

“ you shouldnt hang out with people like him,” hyunjin retorted

you scoffed, “what’s that supposed to mean?”

“i mean blink once if youre being held captive” hyunjin joked, as the rest of the table snickered

however, you didn't find it funny,

who were they to talk about changbin like that??

they didnt even know him

and so you stood up, leaving all your friends calling out for you

-------------

walking to the table, you flopped down on your chair, slamming your backpack on the floor

“what's got you in such a bad mood?” changbin asks

“nothing,” you huffed, getting your materials out of your backpack

you didn't want to tell changbin that your best friends think hes the devil himself and didn't want you around him

meanwhile , changbin was annoyed

it seems like he's shared so much with you since the music room yet he still barely knows anything about you

he wondered that maybe you didn't want to be in his life the way he wanted to be in yours

but fuck it, he’s just gonna spend the time he has with you enjoying it rather than filling his mind with negative thoughts

but damn, you're frown was really bothering him

“y/n,” he says, calling out to you

no response

“y/n,” he continues, poking you on the elbow

still no response

“y/n”

You sigh, looking up at him, an emotionless expression on your face, you responded with a strong, “what.”

*insert changbin doing aegyo*

and with that , you lost it

you were an absolute madman

you never expected that the one and only seo changbin

notorious badboy

would ever do aegyo

all because you had a stupid frown on yourself

you laughed so loud

changbin doing the same as soon as your melodic laugh hit his ears

which resulted to you guys being kicked out of the library

-------------

“ i cant believe you got me kicked out of my favorite place,” you say, seated in a booth inside the ice cream parlor near your guys’ school

another one of changbins ideas

“ hey its not my fault you laugh like a hyena!” he says smiling before you threw a curled up paper tissue at his face

a couple of seconds later, after your laughter has died down

“ so, you want to tell me now why you were in such a sour mood?”

you knew that if you werent gonna tell him now that would still end up finding out about it from someone else

and so you came clean

“ its just my friends,,,, they dont think youre a good influence, wants me to stop hanging out with you” you say

“ oh,”

“ but dont worry!, i didnt listen to them, i actually told them off,” you confessed

“ why didnt you listen to them? theyve been your friends longer than youve known me?” he asks

“ because they dont know you” you reply, “and im sure if they did, they would also be friends with you”

as much as he appreciated the way you stood up for him, he didnt want you going through all that trouble 

‘god, what did he even do to deserve an angel like you,’ changbin thinks to himself 

“ don't tell them off next time,” he grunted

“ wh-what?”

“ everything they say about me is true”

“ changbin, no its not”

“ honestly y/n it doesnt bother me so dont let it bother you”

“ why doesnt it bother you?” you ask, wanting to know the reason

“ because its high school. after this, literally no one would care anymore. and then real life starts, people move on and worry about bigger things, things that actually matter more than the status quo. let them say what they say.”

and just like every other time, changbin has left you stunned

the arrival of Ms. Seo - tuesday 

a week has passed since the ice cream parlor

and Ms. Seo was back in town

this was it

the day you finally put a halt to it

and you were beyond ready

you haven't seen changbin all day

you figured that since his mom was back then he was also back to avoiding the school like it was a plague

you entered Ms. Seos room, determined

“Ms. Seo -”

She puts a hand up to her lips, signaling you to be quiet

‘bitch omygod i literally cant keep doing this any longer,’

‘its already been over a month’

so you ignored her warning

“im not doing this deal anymore. I’ll still tutor changbin but I won’t change him,,,, and you can keep your stupid money,” you let out, releasing all the bottled up emotions

“is that all,”she replies

“yes”

“then you may leave”

what???

it was that easy????

you thought she was gonna stop you, force you to hold your end of the bargain

if you knew it would’ve been this easy then you wouldn’t have worried over it so much

but you don’t know a lot of things

and you certainly didnt know that changbin was on the other line

later that day

you’re seated in the library

usual place, usual time, waiting for the one and only seo changbin, yet he never showed

you didn’t think much of it

‘maybe he just forgot’ you tell yourself

the next day - wednesday

here you were again, waiting for him

still nothing

you try and think of reasons why he wouldn’t show up two days in a row and can really only think of one - maybe his mom told him that he didn’t need tutoring anymore?

but surely, he would tell you

right ???

sure you guys started off on the wrong foot but you were friends now

at least you thought so

you decided to just give him the benefit of the doubt

‘maybe he’s just busy’

2 days later - friday

you’ve tried everything you can do to get a hold of changbin

all your calls went straight to voicemail

texts were left on delivered

you didn’t even see him around school anymore

it was like your worlds never collided and he was never a part of yours

you were starting to get worried, what if he got himself into trouble

“look who decided to show her face,” hyunjin comments as you took the seat next to him

ever since the day you guys had your argument, you have never been able to talk to him about it

“im not in the mood,” you reply,

hyunjin sensing that you were exhausted,

“hey,” he says softly, “what’s wrong?”

“nothing”

“y/n please, we’ve been friends for over 3 years, you don’t need to lie to me”

“aren’t you mad at me?”

“no. im upset that you’ve been pushing us to the side for your little boy toy but im not mad,” he says giving you a soft smile

hhhhh, it was times like these you remember why he was your best friend

hyunjin was just so thoughtful, so caring

you return the smile he gave you as you pulled him in for a tight hug

“I’m sorry hyunjin”

“it’s okay, im sorry too, now tell me what’s wrong?”

“it’s just changbin-“

“I swear to god, if he even laid a finger on you he’s a dead man”

“no!” you say quickly putting an end to his assumption

“so what happened?” he asks, eyebrows going up in sheer curiosity

and then you told him

you told him about the deal with Ms. seo

about how your relationship with changbin changed along the way

how you ended the deal

and now we’re back to changbin and ignoring you

“damn, well have you tried actually going to him?”

“i wouldnt even know where -”

and then it hits you

the abandoned music building

“hyunjin, youre a genius!!!,” you say excitedly

“thanks, we been knew”

“ i have to go ill explain later, bye!!” you say, dashing out of there as fast as you could and made your way to the abandoned building

taking the bus there gave you time to reflect on everything that has happened this past couple month

how much your life has changed since changbin entered it

he pushed you to take risks, to live out of your comfort zone, to not care about other people’s opinions

he made you feel free

and most importantly, he made you happy

the good girl has fallen for the bad boy, i told yall this was gonna be cliche right?

continuing on

just as you  expected, the door was open

the dark didnt even bother you anymore, the only thing in your mind was changbin

oh,, where could he be??

could you ever find your way into this maze of a building and retrace the steps that he took when he was by your side?

as you got deeper and deeper into the building, you feel yourself start to get lost

‘fuck i already saw this door’

‘omg y/n did you really just walk in a circle’

and then you hear it

music, singing

your nightingale

you walk faster, desperate to get to the voice

and here you are now, face to face with the one and only, seo changbin

he stops singing as soon as he saw you walk in

“hey,” you whisper out yet he continued to just stand there, not uttering a single word

“your voice is really pretty, i didnt know you could sing!-”

“what do you want?” his voice, dark and firm just like the day you first met him

This caught you off guard

Did you do something wrong?

“Did i do something wrong?” you say, not aware that you have said your thoughts out loud

changbin chuckles but it was so uninviting, like he was taunting you

“ please, drop the act”

?????

“what?” you reply, completely confused

“ you dont like me ”

“ changbin, what?”

“ you're just like everyone else”

“ changbin i really dont understand pl-”

“ i shouldn't have trusted you.”

“ what?!??, no changbin, you can trust me! just tell me whats wrong!”

all the while, you guys were still talking with a glass between the two of you

ironic, since you felt like a wall has been planted around changbin and you cant reach him  

“ you think i should change”

“ no”

“ what do you mean no? I heard you y/n! I heard what you told my mom, i heard about the stupid deal, the stupid money!”

(⊙…⊙,)

“ changbin, let me explain”

“ i know im known as the bad boy y/n, but you… youre even worse than me”

“ changbin.”

“ youre a monster”

and with hearing those words, the tears that you have been so desperately trying to keep just bursted out like a waterfall

changbin too, has let out his tears

and all we got now are two broken people who can clearly see each other yet are still on opposite sides of the glass

“ you're just like everyone out there that you have resented, you judged me by other people’s words, i thought- i thought that i can finally found someone i could open up to but you never even gave me chance from the beginning”

you let him talk without interrupting him

you deserved the ache you were feeling in your heart

everything he said was true

and with that he breaks down, straight to the floor, back against the wall, hugging his knees

and all you could do was watch, until you couldn't take it anymore

you finally entered the recording booth , taking a seat on the floor right next to him, mimicking his broken figure

“im sorry”

silence

you looked up at the ceiling as you sighed

he deserves an explanation

“ yes, i took the deal, but that's because i thought i needed it changbin. I may be smart, but financially my family isn't doing well. my mom already works extra shifts but it still won't be enough. my dad isnt even in the picture, i dont know where the hell he is”

and with this, changbins head slowly perks up, looking at you with his glass-like eyes, as you continued to stare at the ceiling

you were finally opening up to him

just like how he has been doing

“ i took the deal because, you’re right, i judged you, i was stupid and i never expected us to actually be friends, clearly i was wrong. you have taught me so much. you have pushed me into doing things i never thought i could do. you made me see the world in a different way.”

he’s still just listening to you when you finally took your eyes away from the ceiling and faced him

“ i understand if you dont want to see me anymore but i cant leave you knowing that i never got to say this,” you continue, afraid of the results that were about to come

“ what else are you hiding from me?” he says, but this time, he says it softly, the furious changbin that you have encountered just minutes ago was completely gone

“ i think im in love with you,” you say, quickly looking down, embarrassed at your confession

“ y/n look at me,”

“ i dont want to”

“ why?”

“ i know you're gonna break my heart”

“ you broke mine first,” and with that he lifted your chin up, making you look him straight into his eyes before kissing you

this kiss was different from your first one

it was slow but passionate, filled with all of the unsaid words between the two of you

your guys lips both slightly chapped from all the crying

yet his lips still felt like the softest pair against yours

pulling away, changbin leans his forehead against yours, his eyes closed

yours were open though, taking the sight all in before you pulled away, wiping away his left over tears

“ god, were a mess,” he finally says out loud, before he pulled you in a tight hug 

“ im sorry,” you say again

“ i’ll forgive you if you promise to continue tutoring me?”

“ what ?”

“ continue the deal, get the money”

“ changbin, i really don't want to do that”

“ i know you dont. but we have to finesse my mom somehow,” he says, bursting into a smile, clearly joking

…

..

“eYE,,, i cannot believe you right now! You can't be serious!”

“ but i am. go back into her office tell her you’ll continue it and get the money for your education.”

“changbin! stop joking! I already feel bad about it!”

“Okay fine i just like it when you tutor me okay, its kinda sexy” he says

playfully slapping him, you guys laugh, the tension in the air finally gone

“ you know if you didnt buy me those eggs, we wouldnt be here by now,” you say, a small smile on your face

“ hmm, and why?”

“ because those eggs were the first time i realized that the most notorious bad boy, the one and only Seo Changbin, can also be soft,”

“ do not use my name and soft in the same sentence ever again,”

“ what are you gonna do about it?” you reply, taunting him

and so

he pulled you into another kiss

and another

and another

until a series of laughter coming from the both of you interrupted it

“im glad i bought you those eggs”

hhhhhhh this ending is so rushed and so bad i just didnt wanna leave it unfinished 

ALSO IM SEEING STRAY KIDS BITCHES!!!!!,,,,,, MY SEAT HELLA FAR BUTS ITS OKAY BECAUSE ILL STILL BE THERE ╭(′▽`)╭(′▽`)╯

[mha-fanfic-writer]

Dealing with an ex

                                              Bakugou x Reader

TRIGGER WARNING

ATTEMPTED SUICIDE

SELF HARM

ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP(not with bakugou with monoma)

“Can you leave me alone.”you mumbled under you breath looking down. ”Do you want me to punish you (Y/N).”you looked up with terror in your eyes.He really wasn’t giving up.”I told you i want to break up”you said taking a step back.He grabbed your arm and pulled you to his dorm.You knew what was happening,so when you went into the 1-B dorms and got some weird looks,you just looked down at the floor as you walked with him.When you had made it to his dorm you begged him not to but he did any way.you cried and cried. He was beating you.”you need a punishment for trying to leave me.”Please stop I promise i wont do it again.He stopped.”Fine go to your dorm and don't tell anybody.You nodded.You and monama had been dating sense middle school you wanted to break up now be he wouldn't let you.You walked out of his dorm hiding your face,You had so many bruises on your body.Today you had lash marks on your back ,a bleeding lip and a bruise on your face.You had to tell your friends that you messed up trying to train.You walked back into the 1-A dorms.When you were walking to your dorm the common room had all your classmates talking yelling and laughing.You wished you could stay but you just walked past.of course the baku squad saw you they were your closest friends.”Hey (Y/N) were were y-OH MY GOSH WHAT HAPPEN”Mina said running up to you.this got the attention of the whole class.You put on a fake smile and said your usual lie. “I was training and screwed up a move. Im fine-” “bullshit”you were cut of by bakugou lifting your head to get a better look at your face. “someone did this to you,you come back everyday with a new bruise or cut with the same damn excuse. These injures arent from training someone did it.”He said crossing his arms over his chest.”No they were from training”you said trying to hide the surprise in your voice.”oh really so your back bleeding from something hitting you 3 times is training.”he said turning your back towards him.The whole class was watching all worried.”SHIT”is all you said you tried running but bakugou grabbed you arm.You didn't like that it made you think he was going to hurt you.you started crying “PLEASE DONT HURT ME AGAIN I LL DO ANYTHING.”you were on your knees crying.He let go of your arm.The whole class was in shock one of the toughest people they knew was crying on there knees almost begging for there life.the baku squad knelled down to your level.”who did this”Kirisham asked.worry on his face. “ I-I cant s-say h-ell hurt me a-again.” you stuttered.they didn't know you were dating anybody much less Monama. You got up an ran to your dorm room and locked the door.You had promised that you wouldn't do this anymore to yourself but your mom she was gone now.You heard banging on the door you told them that you will be out in a little just give you 2 hours.the banging stopped. You opened your a book,well something that looked like a book it was actually a box.You pulled out a blade and did what you needed to do.Once you were done with that you took of your clothes let your shirt souk in hot water to get the blood off of the shirt.you looked at your body and then looked at your back.The cuts were deep.It looked like a lion had dragged there claws across your back.You didn't expect them to be tat bad but it is what it is.When you got into the shower you felt the burn on your wounds. You covered your mouth trying to yell from the sting.After you were done you looked at your cuts on your arm.They were deep these weren't the only ones there you others from different times still scabbed. You but on a light pink sweater with some jeans wanting to cover your legs and also because your sweats were being washed.you brushed your hair and put it a ponytail your bangs falling on the sides of your face.It had been 2 hours so you knew you had to go out.You opened your door slowly. Once the cost was clear you went to the kitchen.You managed to get passed the common room not being seen.When you passed by you saw everybody sitting on the couch waiting for you.They were worried.Even bakugou and todoroki. When you were in the kitchen you opened the fridge grabbed and apple and when you closed the door you saw a very angry bakugou standing there arms crossed and all. “come on.”you fallowed him leaving the apple on the counter.When you were in the common room everybody was looking at you.”ok mineta isn't here and denki said he could handle it.”Bakugou said taking a seat you sat next to him.”Take off your sweater let us see your cuts.”you didn't want to but you knew you had to other wise he wouldn't stop telling you something,so slowly you took off the sweater when bakugou saw the wounds he was shocked.When everybody saw the shock in his eyes along with worry they knew it was bad. they all got up and looked.You could here some of the girls crying and the guys were just quiet even midoriya was quit. you hid your arms in your lap. “turn around” you heard bakugou say in his monotone voice.You did as he said you were looking down,tears were rolling down your face.He slowly went to grab your arm when hes hand was in your sight and you saw what he wanted to look at,so you just pulled your arms further in between your legs.His eyes widened. “Please i want to help you”He said his tone more caring than usual.Yes bakugou was an asshole most of the time he knew that stuff like this shouldn't be taken lightly.you were about to show him when there was a knock on the doors of the 1-A dormitory. Midoriya went to open the door the next thing you heard was midoriya saying “Monama WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE” when you heard that you grabbed you sweater and went to the door.”Hey what are you doing here”you said in confused and worried tone.”Oh nothing i just wanted to check on you because I saw you were hurt after you were doing some extra training.”He said with a smile looking at you in the eyes as if to intimidate you.”Oh yeah sorry for making you worry we were just having uh..a meeting about school and studying.”you said calmly with a warm smile.If there something you knew how to do it was faking everything.you learned how after the first month if dating him when it all started.He smiled and hugged you patting your back on purpose to see your reaction.Your eyes widened at the sudden contact he then pushed a finger into the wound and whispered”don't tell,love you” you nodded in response. Blinking back the tears.He let go and left. Midoriya saw the whole interaction he didn't notice him hurt you though.You two walked back to the couches.The class was waiting there still bakugou got up.he walked over towards you stopped in front of you.You looked at him and saw what he was looking at.You could see he wanted to see your arms.You lifted your arms knowing that the truth would come out eventually. You pulled your sleeves up.when he saw what you did he called the rest of the bakusquad over.when they saw it they started counting then mina took out a permanent marker and rote 15 on top of your arms.they lifted up there sleeves even bakugou. They all had numbers on there arms.then you saw some scars on all of there arms that were from cuts.the scars were faint but still noticeable. They gave you a smile except bakugou he just looked at you and you could see that he cared in his eyes.you felt tears roll down your face.They gave you a hug.When you guys got back to your places he asked you 1 question. “When did this start all the scars and everything.” he said bluntly.You looked up.”the first year of middle school.” Once again he was shocked.So was the rest of the class.After that very few things changed they always asked if you were ok and occasionally asked you if you ready to talk about who was doing this to you.you were never planing on telling them so the response was “no, not yet.”But with monama things just got worse everyday the beating went from once a week to every 2 days to every single day.It had been one year seance that whole conversation with the class and now you guys were second years you were still going through it, the winter was the worst. Monama spent everyday with you if you said or did something wrong he would hit you.When you went back to school you were pretty much emotionless.the fire in your eyes was completely gone the person they thought was one of the bravest was completely broken.When you walked into the classroom you didn't have any expression on your face.Th class looked at you they’ed never seen you like this.You just bowed and said “Apologizing for being late sensei” this threw him off guard because before you were so lively he told you to sit at your desk staring in disbelief.Yes aizawa could be cold but he was worried.You took your seat witch was the one in front of bakugous.you guys were training for the class it was supposed to be to see how far your quirks were since the last training last year.You were going up ageist kirishima .when aizawa blew the whistle you had no problem beating him 10 seconds in.your quirk was way better than before. Kirishima was suprised.you stopped your quirk and helped him up.When he grabbed your hand he could feel it ice cold.Then he noticed something he didn't before you had bags under your eyes and you looked pale.He was scared not of you but of what happen to you.After training you avoided everybody. You went directly to monama. Who put his arm in between yours and back in his pocket walking with his friends. Kendo was a bit worried but when she asked you smiled and told her you were fine. Tetsutetsu was the only one who knew what was going on but was threatened by monama to the point were he kept his mouth shut.He didn't like what he was ding or what monama was doing to you but he didn't do anything.Every time someone tried to talk to you,yo ran to monama.he patted you no the head and said he loved you but you weren't sure he did.You fell out of love with him years ago.This time he was mad because he found out what the conversation was about when he went to check on you last year.”So you decided to tell them you were getting hurt by someone.huh did you tell them it was me.”he asked pushing you ageist the wall in his dorm.You simply shook your head.He kept you there and punched you in your stomach your face he kissed you but he was biting your lip so hard to the point were it was bedding. You didn't cry and he didn't like that.He took a knife from his drawer turned you around lifted up your shirt and cut open the scars from last year.this earned a yell from you you didn't like it at all.”PLEASE STOP PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU IT HURTS.”you begged and begged but he didn't stop he tied a something around you neck it was suffocating you and you couldn't breath you passed out when you woke up you were on his ben and he was looking at you still mad.He kicked you out of his room .Literally. When you were out side of his room your shirt was bloody and your neck and a red mark around it.When yo looked up you saw tetsutetsu there he was shocked but you got up and asked in a monotone voice “do you have a turtleneck i can use preferably black.” he nodded went back to his dorm and gave it to you.when you went back to your dorm you walked into the common room there you saw people crying.holding each other.”what happen guys”you asked looking at them.They looked at you in disgust. they ignored you and looked away all except for bakugou. When they did this your heart hurt.You didn't think you could feel worse than you already did.Your eyes turned gray you were empty now this was a side affect of your quirk depending on what you felt. you forgot about the pain in your heart.You bowed “I'm sorry for being a burden on all of you guys. ill leave now.” you walked to your room. When you lied on your bed. “Maybe I should die and everybody would be happy.” you said to yourself. “yeah that's best, ill do it tomorrow.” you plugged in your head phones to your phone and listened to music this is how you maintained your sanity.You slowly drifted off to sleep.When you woke up you were late you didn't care though you just put on your uniform and walked to school building.When you walked in you heard whispers from everybody.It didn't bother you.You made your way to the roof at lunch.you took off your shoes and let your hair down.It stated raining and the wind picked up for once you felt at peace.you climbed the fence that want relay that high you sat on it ready to say goodbye. “Goodbye guys i hope your happy now.”you jumped off but you felt something grab your arm.you looked up it was bakugou.”What are you doing here bakugou” you said looking up at him.When your eyes met his you could see the anger the fear the worry the sadness.He pulled you up. “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING (Y/N) you don't deserve this,don't you know nobody will ever understand the person you are learn to hold your own hand get your shit together you'll never be what you want not with that face.”he then pulled you in and hugged you.When he looked into your eyes he started crying. “hey its ok dont cry it will be fine” you say putting your hand on his head.He looks at you,you feel something,you don't know what it is but you feel something. He then says, “Im sorry for what im about to do” he said cuffing your face in his hands.He then leans in and kisses you it was a tender kiss.His lips were soft at that moment you felt happy.You closed your eyes and then opened them the color was back,the flame in your eyes returning. You moved you hands to his neck messing with the hair on the back of his neck he then moves his hands to you waist pulling you closer.Once you break apart.You start to cry and hug him.”Thank you” is all you said before pulling him back in for another kiss.You guys staid together for the rest of the day.When you guys went to the common room you were on bakugou's back sleeping your face berried in his neck. He put you on the couch.The rest of the class was surprised.”Bakugou what are doing why are you with(Y/N).”Bakugou then proceeds to tell them what happened on the roof.Midoriya started to cry and so did the some of the others.Bakugou then walked up to you and shook you awake.When you opened your eyes you saw the class there staring at you.you were scared so you turned your back to them bakugou sat on the edge of the couch playing with your hair. “Are they gonna hurt me” you asked looking up at him “No” you got up pulling bakugou up on the couch hiding behind him peaking over his shoulder. “Ok” you responded in a quit voice.They all bowed and apologized to you for hurting you even more.You forgave them. “ ok look I know you wont want to talk about this but you have to.” bakugou said looking at you holding your hand.you nodded.You took a deep breath and explained everything to them when you first started dating monama to the beating to you trying to break up with him the fact that tetsutetsu knew to monama opening your wounds again last night and everything.Bakugou was angry sad hurt and worried.Once you were done he picked you up sat you on his lap and lifted your shirt to see that the wounds had been reopened.He got up he told you to get on his back and you did he said you guys were going to confront him and get him out of the school you were scared so you just stayed quit.you were on 5″0 and he was 5′7 you were really light and short for your age.You told him to wait then you got off of his back ran to your room got a blanket and rapped it around you ran back out and got on his back he tied the corners around his chest and waist that way you were completely hidden.The whole class was planing on going and they did.When once you guys made it to the 1-B dorms the one who opened was keno she was surprised to see all of the class there.She let you in.And there in the common room was there whole class.When monamas eyes landed on you you hid your head in the blanket.”whats up class A” tetsutetsu said “your super unmanly bro” kirishima said. “you need to show them (Y/N)”bakugou said you sighed and slipped out of the blanket.Bakugou nodded at you.you turned around facing him and took off your shirt so the others could see the wounds.The whole class looked in shock and gasped.Monama was going to play it off as if he didn't know asked “how did that happen babe.”well instead of being scared you snaped.you turned and looked at him “WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN BY WHAT HAPPEND,YOU DID THIS TO ME.YOU ARE THE REASON I WAS IN PAIN YOU ARE THE REASON I JUMPED OFF THE ROOF,IF BAKUGU WASN'T THERE I WOULD BE DEAD AND IT WOULD BE YOUR FAULT.I WANTED TO BREAK UP WITH YOU A MONTH AFTER WE STARTED DATING BUT YOUR DUMBASS FORCED ME TO STAY WITH YOU FOR ALL THESE YEARS.YOU BROKE ME.I WAS AVOIDING MY FRIENDS BECAUSE OF YOU,BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO GET HURT BUT THERE REALLY WAS NO ESCAPE TO GETTING HURT WITH YOU.I DIDN'T LET PEOPLE TOUCH ME BECAUSE I WAS SO AFRAID OF WHAT YOU DID I THOUGHT THEY WERE GOING TO DO THE SAME.I AM SO STUPID FOR EVER TRUSTING YOU.i NEVER LOVED YOU I NEVER EVEN LIKED YOU.AND I NEVER WILL YOU FUCKING BASTARD.”you lifted up your sleeves.”I HOPE YOUR HAPPY WITH YOURSELF AFTER ALL OF THIS.YOU KICKED,PUNCHED,CUT,AND BURNED ME FOR EVERYTHING I DID.”he was quit after that kendo spoke up tears in her eyes you two were close you her and monoma had gone to middle school together.”how could you”is all she said.Bakugou was surprised because you weren't one to yell a lot or cuss.Bakugou gave you your sweater.and you put it on.He then started walking towards the monoma. “I don't want you to EVER come near them ever again understood because if i see you enen 10 feet near them i wont hesitate to blow your ass all the way to the moon.”He said in a harsh threatening tone lingering over monoma. You know what just forget about me”monoma said. “how am i supposed to forget you when everytime i go outside i see thing that remind me of you like garbage mins and dog shit”you said with a evil smirk crossing your arms over your chest.That earned laughter from everybody except him.He walked out but nobody noticed that ida went to get the teachers,so when he opened the door he was greeted by a very very angry aizawa.Apparently ida had told the teachers everything you and bakugou said and did plus what he witnessed.Tetsutetsu apologise for not saying anything.You ruffled his hair and said that you didn't mind he wanted to be safe himself along with his family which is what monama said he was going to do something to his family.Kirishima said he was taking points off for not telling him at least but forgave him too.After you all went back to the dorms,recovery girl came to heal yo as best she could.The next day when you woke up you wanted to tell bakugou how you felt about him.But he beat you to it.When you walked out of your dorm he was there.He pulled you close to him by your waist and kissed yo it lasted longer than the other ones you shared with him.you both pulled away to catch your breath. “I love you” is all he said “I love you too”

[thechildoflightning]

Growing Roots Ch3- Hypocotyl

Title: Growing Roots [Masterpost]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Pairings: platonic Prinxiety, background Logicality

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Chapter Title: Hypocotyl

Summary: 

A plant, much like friendship, doesn’t grow in a day. To grow, a plant requires the right nutrients, proper soil conditions, and correct lighting to grow to its full potential. Even with this perfect balance, not every plant makes it. A friendship is much more delicate, and a lot more complex.

Or: How exactly did Roman and Virgil become friends?

Warnings: PTSD, Intentional Self-Harm (past), Unintentional Self-Harm, RSD, Sucide Attempt (past), Scars, Blood, Islamphobia

[ao3 link]

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Growing Roots Ch3- Hypocotyl

After that night, Roman thought things between him and Virgil were bound to get better. After all, it’s not like things could get worse. In addition, Roman now had a better understanding of Virgil. He knew that Virgil had PTSD and his PTSD had to do with a bad situation where something involving sexual assault (or at least near or relating to it) had happened. He could work with that. He could support Virgil through that.

But things between them didn’t get better, In fact, if anything, Virgil seemed to draw more and more away. The problem was, he wasn’t only drawing away from Roman, but Patton and Logan as well. Roman could understand if Virgil didn’t like him. Roman knew he had fucked up plenty of times. But Patton and Logan were such good people and he couldn’t figure out why Virgil would draw away from them too.

(Maybe it was because Roman was spending more time with them. Maybe Virgil was canceling plans more just to avoid Roman. Maybe Roman should start backing out so Virgil could have the support he needed from Patton and Logan. After all, they were friends first. He was the newest, last member. The least important).

It was as a result of this recent behavior that Virgil’s newest text to Roman came as a surprise.

V: Can u come over? I have to give u something

V: It’ll be quick

R: can it b later? have a class soon

V: It’ll be quick

R: is that ur way of saying that it cant wait

V: ,,,yes?

With a huff, Roman shoved his phone in his pocket and left for Virgil’s dorm, not knowing what was so important that it couldn’t wait two hours. Luckily, his dorm building was only two away from Virgil’s. If he jogged, he could get there quickly, get whatever Virgil had for him, and still make it on time to class.

He did exactly that, coming to a stop outside Virgil’s door with little huffs of breathe to show the fact that he had raced across part of campus. Hopefully this wouldn’t take longer than a minute. Roman really hated to skip class, he struggled with his grades enough as is.

Now at the door, he texted the boy and then knocked, knowing that Virgil wouldn’t answer the door unless he knew who was there.

It wasn’t a long wait, the door quickly twisting open to reveal a disheveled Virgil.

“I need you to take this,” Virgil said, shoving something into his hands almost immediately.

Roman stumbled a bit to keep a steady hold on the item considering he wasn’t really expecting something to be dramatically shoved into his arms.

“Uh, okay,” he said as he readjusted what he could not identify as a locked box in his arms, “What is it?”

“Stuff,” Virgil replied, “Here’s the key. Don’t open it.”

Roman readjusted the box again to grab the key from Virgil.

“So you’re giving me a locked box and the key that goes with it but I’m not allowed to open it?”  he questioned.

He shifted from foot to foot, gaze traveling from the box back to Virgil. Because what the hell? What was so important about this damn box that he had to come over right now and take it but wasn’t allowed to know anything about it? He had a class he had to get to! He didn’t have time for mysterious boxes.

“Yes, no opening it,” Virgil agreed, “And you keep it until I want the box back.”

Okay, what? Virgil wasn’t just giving him the box? He wanted it back? Roman was box-sitting? Why was Roman box-sitting? What was he supposed to do with any of this?

“Uh, then why are you giving to me?” Roman asked. 

Roman thought he had been lost before, but well, now he was even more confused. It reminded him of that show “Naked and Afraid” except the setting was Virgil’s dorm instead of being stranded on an island and a title like “A Box and Vague Words” would probably fit the situation better.

“I can’t have it right now,” Virgil explained. But, no, it wasn’t really an explanation. It was a half-explanation to avoid actually explaining.

“The box?” Roman questioned, “You can’t have the box right now?”

Virgil sighed and rolled his eyes before giving Roman a look like he was stupid. Which was not fair at all. Here Virgil was texting him to come over immediately, demanding he take a box, not telling him what was in, eventually wanting it back, but unable to have it right now. So sue him for being confused. It was a confusing situation!

“What’s in the box,” Virgil attempted to clarify, “I can’t have what’s in the box right now.”

“Well, what’s in the box?”

“Can’t tell you that.”

Of course not. Virgil could just never make things easy, could he.

“Virgil I’m not taking a sketchy locked box from you unless you allow me to open it or you tell me what’s in it.”

“Just take it.”

“No.”

“Roman, I really really really need you to take the box.”

“What’s in the box, Virgil?”

He was raising his voice a bit at this point, something he only noticed when Virgil took a step back and Trixie took a step forward, going into a Block. 

Right. Virgil didn’t like yelling.

He took a breath and lowered his volume.

“Sorry,” he said immediately, “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Virgil relaxed slightly as he exhaled loudly.

“It’s just- Virgil I’m not taking a random box from you in this weird as fuck situation if you’re not going to tell me what’s in it.”

The boy froze. The previous tension didn’t quite return to his body but he also didn’t relax any further. Instead he just went completely still. He seemed to calculate something in the silence, though Roman had no idea what.

Eventually, he refocused on Roman, and Roman was surprised to find a bit of steel in his eyes. 

“The box contains everything sharp I own,” Virgil admitted, his voice small.

Roman blinked.

What?

This was what Virgil couldn’t tell him was in the box? I mean sure it was weird, but not nearly on the level Roman was expecting. Honestly, he didn’t know what he had been expecting. Human organs? Evidence of money laundering? Virgil’s diary?

“Well that’s not ominous at all,” Roman offered, “But, uh, why are you giving them to me? Is this some kind of social experiment or something?”

Really. Sharp things? Again, kind of creepy but not what he had been expecting.

Virgil just blinked at him.

Roman stared right back.

Virgil sighed loudly and gave Roman the same look he gave him earlier, like Roman was an idiot or something. He bristled up a bit.

“No. I- Roman. Everything sharp I own,” Virgil repeated. Roman nodded. The better explanation followed, “Everything I could hurt myself with.”

Roman went back to blinking.

“I’m sorry, what?” he asked.

“Everything I could hurt myself with,” Virgil repeated, and then he was off, “And I mean, I know I said everything sharp, but it’s not just sharp things. I uh- there’s all my meds in there except for like a week’s dosage so I don’t run out and I threw in some cleaning chemicals and stuff because even though I don’t think I- well it’s just better to be safe, so... Oh! And I couldn’t get rid of everything glass, but all the glass from picture frames because, well, I’ve- in the past- well yeah. Just thought it was better not to have them, y’know?”

Roman just held the box as Virgil’s rambling came to a close. 

The speech filtered in but didn’t seem to quite connect.

“What?” Roman asked, “Virge, why would you hurt yourself? Why are you giving me these things?”

Virgil shifted on his feet and his hands came to grasp his elbows. His nails dug in sharply through his hoodie. Trixie whined and nudged his arms away from one another. When his grip loosened, Roman noticed the spots of darker coloration on the jackets arms.

“V-Virgil,” Roman started, heart thrumming in his chest, “Are- are you bleeding?”

A million expressions passed across the older boys face, all to quickly for Roman to decipher even one of them. 

“I- Roman I struggle with self-harm. I have for a long time. I- I haven't done it for over a year now. But the urges still presents itself all the time. Usually it’s manageable. Right now it’s less so. That’s why I need you to take the box right now.”

Roman felt like his head was going to explode and his heart was going to leap out of his chest.

“Allahu-” Roman starts, before cutting himself off. He knew what ‘allahu akbar’ means. He knew that in this case it’s just a simple expression to him. He also knew what other people thought of it. He knew that the words are equivalent to ‘terrorist’ in their eyes. How many times had he been called exactly that for much less?

“Virgil,” he restarted, “Virgil did you- are you bleeding? Are you- Virgil did you hurt yourself? You- You’re arms.” 

He saw the hoodie and those had to be bloodstains and that meant that Virgil bled through his hoodie and was Virgil hurting himself? Was his friend doing this to his body. They were friends right? I mean, Virgil had come to him and now Roman had to deal with his. His friend was hurting himself so what did he do?

“No, no,” Virgil said frantically. He shook his head so hard Roman would be surprised he didn’t get whiplash.

It didn’t do much to cause Roman to relax.

“I didn’t hurt myself,” Virgil promised.

That, on the other hand, did allow Roman to relax a little bit. His shoulders loosened and he felt like he could breathe again.

“I mean, I kind of did hurt myself,” Virgil admitted, “but it wasn’t really on purpose? And it’s not bad!”

Roman was back to being very worried. This whole conversation was making his head spin. He felt like the physical manifestation of a 404 error code.

He wondered if this was what Logan felt like when he got so overwhelmed by everything that he couldn’t talk and had to be left alone for awhile. 

Virgil seemed to be able to tell that Roman was completely lost, because he carried on with his explanation.

“Okay so. I don’t self-harm anymore. Or I haven’t for a year. But I’m having the worst urges I’ve had in a while. And I would ask Patton or Logan instead of you-” That stung a bit but was also probably fair. Virgil and him weren’t the closest. “-But they went home yesterday evening because neither of them had classes today and so they left for the three day weekend. And I am bleeding and I did hurt myself but I didn’t mean to. It was unintentional. I was digging my nails in my arms and I don’t mean to but I do that a lot sometimes. Trixie catches it for me. But well, I’ve been doing it a lot recently because things haven’t been the best so I accidentally broke skin and started bleeding. But I didn’t mean to and it’s not bad.”

Okay. That was a lot all at once. Roman worked on focusing on the things he could handle now.

“Virgil, you’re bleeding through your jacket.”

Virgil’s eyes went wide and he turned his arm to look at. He brushed a finger against the blood stain.

Sure, it was a small bloodstain. And Virgil’s jacket wasn’t very thick, worn down by tons of use. But he had bleed through his jacket, which meant that the wound was a little more than a bug bite. It might not be bleeding profusely, and would probably clot pretty quickly, but a band aid would probably still help.

“Do you have band aids?” Roman asked.

Virgil’s brow furrowed but he nodded anyways.

Neither of them moved.

“Can- can I come in?” Roman asked.

Even after this long and pretty draining conversation, he was just awkwardly standing right outside of Virgil’s dorm holding a box of all the things Virgil owned that he could hurt himself with.

“I can get a band aid myself,” Virgil insisted.

Roman hesitated.

“I know. But, I’m concerned. Please? It would make me feel better.”

Virgil stood there for a while, shifting in the doorway. Roman could practically see the gears in his mind turning.

“Okay,” he allowed eventually as he moved out of the way of the dorm. Roman entered as Virgil wandered over to a shelf, presumably to grab a band aid. Roman took a seat at the desk off to the side. Trixie sat near him, out of the way but with her eyes on Virgil.

Virgil grabbed a small first aid kit and brought it over. He opened it and pulled out a band aid.

“See, I have band aids, I’m fine,” Virgil insisted as he waved the band aid in Roman’s face.

“Okay, let’s see the damage,” Roman insisted, reaching out to grab Virgil’s arm.

Virgil jerked back and Trixie was up in seconds, going straight into a Block between Virgil and Roman.

“Virgil?”

“I- uh-” the boy stuttered, “Uh, please don’t do that.”

“Do what?” Roman asked, a frown on his lips.

“Try and grab me.”

“I wasn’t. I was just trying to look at your arm,” Roman insisted.

Why had Virgil freaked so bad? He was just trying to help.

But this was what being around Virgil was always like. Roman was always walking on eggshells and never knew what to do. Virgil could just randomly go off and Roman wouldn’t know what was wrong. He would then feel terrible because he knew Virgil had PTSD, didn’t know the specifics, but it was obvious that he was affected by it. Roman was trying, he was, but he didn’t even know where to start.

“Just, please, don’t do that again?” Virgil asked.

Now that Virgil had told him, Roman wouldn’t do it. That wasn’t the problem. He was good at respecting Virgil’s boundaries now. The problem was that things always went this way. Roman would do something and it would set Virgil off and then he would just feel this crushing guilt. Then Virgil would tell him not to do it again and Roman would try not to but he didn’t even know what he did in the first place and Virgil never explained. Of course, he didn’t really expect Virgil to explain because that was unfair but it did make everything so much harder for Roman.

Roman hated messing up like this because he thought Virgil was maybe his friend now but how could they be when Roman could never get anything right?

Instead of voicing any of these concerns, Roman just mumbled a simple, “Okay, I won’t,” and left it at that.

Virgil gave him a wary look and a nod, so Roman assumed he was in the clear.

“Just, can I see your arm?” he asked, “I want to make sure you’re okay.”

Virgil hesitated but nodded. He set the first aid supplies down and took to shucking off his jacket, exposing his arms. Arms that had scars littered across them like spiderwebs. Planned and coordinated, like little lines swirling and growing. Roman felt sick.

“The fuck,” Roman blurted out.

Virgil stiffened and brought his arms in close to his chest, jacket falling to the ground.

“Virgil- Virgil your arms I-”

Roman had never seen anything like this. Sure there had been a kid in his high school who went around every day showing off two new lines to her classmates as if they were some sort of prize. But those had been two a day and had barely bled enough to be even called cuts. None of them left scars.

Virgil’s arms were covered. Most of them were small to medium sized, wrapping around the sides like mini white bracelets. Some were more faded than others and blended in better, but many were still stark and apparent against Virgil’s light skin.

The most shocking were the two long ones that stretched vertically. They were bumpy and raised and Roman had only seen them for a minute but he had seen them. He had never seen them in person, had kind of thought they were a myth of the media. But he knew what they were.

A suicide attempt.

Virgil had tried to kill himself.

“I just told you I had a history with self-harm,” Virgil muttered meekly as Roman continued to stare. Not that there was much to stare at now that Virgil clutched his arms to his chest.

What was he supposed to do in this situation?

“Roman?”

It was the tone of voice that got through to him. Roman had heard Virgil happy, mad, angry, sad, scared. He might not have been friends with the boy long, but he had known him for a bit longer. He had seen Virgil in better and worse moods and learned the tones that went with each one.

But he had never heard the boy sound meek and small like this before.

Roman snapped out of it.

“Okay,” he said, to steady himself, “Okay. Let’s take a look at where you’re bleeding.”

Virgil didn’t move.

“Virge,” he pleaded.

The other boy relented and held his arm out. Roman took it gently and turned it so he could see the small marks near his elbow. 

They were bleeding slightly, but Virgil hadn’t been kidding when he said that they were small. They were also clearly from his nails and didn’t seem intentional like the lines further down on his wrists.

Roman trusted that they had been an accident.

It made all of this a lot easier to deal with.

(He wouldn’t of known what to do if they hadn’t been an accident).

The blood had smeared a bit, presumably where it had soaked into the hoodie. Roman moved around to gather the needed supplies, Virgil trailed after Roman, and Trixie followed Virgil. A miniature congo line of disaster.

Roman grabbed a bottle of water from Virgil’s desk and found a Kleenex off to the side. He poured a bit of water onto the Kleenex and set to wiping away the blood.

When he had cleaned the small wound he took the band aid Virgil offered him and placed it on the scratch.

He did the entire procedure twice more. Once more on the arm he held now, and then again on the other.

When he was done, he released Virgil and threw away the trash.

“Thanks,” Virgil muttered. He pulled his arms back into him but didn’t replace his hoodie. Roman didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

Virgil looked back up at him.

“Uh, you can- you can go now?” he half told, half asked, “Just please take the box with you.”

“No, yeah, I’ll take the box,” Roman confirmed. Now that he knew how could he not? “It’s just, Virgil, are you okay?”

“Fine,” he muttered, as he quickly turned away from Roman to put away the first aid supplies.

“Bullshit,” Roman declared loudly. Virgil flinched and dropped the kit. Trixie quickly pressed up against him. Roman made a note to lower his volume.

“I-” Virgil hesitated.

“Virgil we’re friends right?” Roman asked, “I mean, I think we are? I want to be? And friends help each other out, okay. I’m- I’m here for you, alright?”

Virgil turned around and met his eyes. Roman got the distinct feeling that he was looking for something, but he didn’t know what Virgil was looking for, or if he would find it.

Virgil eventually sighed and clutched his elbows. Trixie nosed his arms and he dropped them to his sides before picking up the first aid kit he had dropped.

“I- I’m having a tough time,” he admitted.

No shit. 

But this was progress. This was Virgil opening up. Roman just had to figure out how to keep it going.

“How can I help?” he asked.

Virgil squeezed his eyes shut.

“You can’t,” he answered miserably.

“Bullshit,” Roman declared again, but quieter, “I might not be able to like, make you not want to hurt yourself. But I can help you. C’mon Charlie Frown, let me in. I’m here for you.”

Virgil burst into tears.

Roman blinked and took a step back. Whatever this reaction was, it was not one he was expecting. He was way out of his depth here.

He was always out of his depth with Virgil, always saying the wrong things. Roman had always been a good dancer, but around Virgil he had two left feet and another in his mouth. He could never say or do the right thing. Ever.

Maybe Virgil didn’t want to be his friend. Roman was pretty shit at it anyway.

Virgil continued to cry.

Roman tried to push down the self-doubt and loathing. It wasn’t the time for it. He was trying, and for now that would have to be enough. He refocused on Virgil.

“Hey, uh, Virgil, shit. Uh, hey it’s gonna be okay?”

Roman’s words seemed to be unheard or ignored as Virgil continued to crying. Roman didn’t know what to do.

Virgil’s crying continued to increase until he started choking on his breathe, his gulps of air becoming tiny frantic wheezes.

Trixie, who had been pawing at him for a while now, jumped up slightly to tap Virgil on his chest. He finally seemed to notice his dog and- lacking any sort of grace- collapsed to the floor. Trixie immediately covered him, performing what Roman thought Virgil had called ‘DPT.’

Roman just stood there, feeling absolutely helpless, but knowing at least enough to not interfere with Trixie’s work.

He stood there for what seemed like ages before Virgil got his breathing back under control. Roman couldn’t help but think that he was definitely missing his class today. He wasn’t going to be leaving Virgil like this.

As Virgil slowly began to be able to breathe again, Roman joined him on the floor, keeping a wide area of space between him and the other boy. He didn’t want to scare Virgil.

“Hey, Virge,” Roman murmured softly. The other boys eyes flickered up to his own as Virgil desperately wiped tears away from his eyes. “We don’t have to talk or anything, but is it okay if I stay with you for a while?”

“I’m fine,” Virgil muttered stiffly.

“You might be,” Roman agreed.

Virgil blinked, as if trying to compute the words Roman had just said.

“Yes,” he said slowly, “I’m fine. So you can leave.”

“If you really want me to, I’ll leave,” Roman said, “But I’d like to stay.”

Virgil played with his dogs fur and studied her carefully to avoid looking at Roman.

“Why?” he eventually asked.

“Why what?”

“Why do you want to stay?”

Roman gave a little frown and leaned forward from his seated position.

“Virgil- Well, like you said earlier, you’re having a bit of a rough time. And you might be fine. I get that. I’m not here to tell you that you’re not. But I am your friend. Or at least I’m trying to be your friend. And friend’s help each other out when the other’s not doing so well, right?”

Virgil’s eyes started to turn glassy again and he blinked to hold back tears. He continued to not face Roman.

“You don’t have to stay,” Virgil said.

Now Roman got it. He hadn’t before, hadn’t understood why Virgil had been so evasive, so detached. Maybe there was more to it, maybe there was something else (there always was when it came to Virgil), but Roman understood this. He understood the stressed word. He understood the connotation behind it.

“Virgil,” Roman insisted, “I know I don’t have to stay. I want to.”

Virgil hesitated, then nodded.

It didn’t fix anything. It certainly wouldn’t fix Virgil’s problems, nor would it fix Roman’s. But maybe it wasn’t the time to fix something. Maybe it was the time to build. Inshallah, Roman was going to succeed at building this friendship between Virgil and him.

~

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[retrocelly]

You’ve Been Distant (Tyler Seguin)

A/N: I banged this out in about an hour and barely proof-read it, so sorry for any mistakes. I’m in an angsty Tyler Seguin mood and I can't help it.

Warnings: angst, age gap (everything legal of course), cursing, yelling, basically everything that comes with arguing

Word count: 2,378

Everything about Tyler was familiar. You knew the subtleties of the way he spoke, the way he would lean on you for comfort after a particularly rough game, and all of the things that made him tick. However, you didn’t know this Tyler. Recently, he had been distant from you. He would come home from roadies and hardly acknowledge your presence within your shared home. He seemed reluctant to talk to you about his day, or listen as you spoke about yours. He hadn’t been inviting you to come out with the boys after a win like he normally would. After nearly a year and a half together, you’d grown accustomed to Tyler being borderline clingy at times; hanging on your every word and staying near you like a lovestruck puppy. But the separation came all of a sudden: he just came home one night, took the dogs out, then went to bed without a second glance your way. From that point, it’d been nearly three weeks since you’d had your Tyler.

Your worry wasn’t that he’d fallen out of love with you or that he’d been unfaithful, but rather that he’d finally listened to what everyone had been telling him for over a year: you’re too young. Sure, a seven year age gap was a lot to some people. Hell, even you and Tyler had been wary to start a relationship at first. It hadn’t taken long for the both of you to realize that you were too good together, you complimented each other in every way. Since then there hadn’t been a doubt in your mind, but you couldn’t say the same for Tyler. You noticed the way that he paused before telling his friends that you couldn’t drink while out with them since you were only 20. You noticed how he shifted when he introduced you to his family, praying that they wouldn’t be surprised by how young you looked. You noticed all of it. 

You needed desperately to talk to Tyler about all of it and just get a feel for where his head was at. Then again, how on earth were you supposed to do that when he wouldn’t talk to you at all? Luckily, the Stars didn’t have a game tonight and you figured that he’d be home from practice by 2pm, giving the two of you plenty of time to talk.  Your were right, and right around 2, all of the dogs got up to stand around the front door. You gave Tyler a moment to set all of his things down and greet the dogs before you spoke.

“Hey Ty,” you started, trying your hardest to sound cheerful, “how was practice?”

He gave you a quick glance, his face remaining stern.

“Good.” 

That was it. Good. You hated the word.

“Well when you have a minute, I need to talk to you about something.” Tyler let out a heavy sigh and ran a hand through his hair.

“I’m pretty tired after practice, Y/N. Can we just talk some other time?” Tired, he was always tired. After practice, after games, after going out with friends. When wasn’t he tired anymore?

“No, Tyler,” you sighed, “it’s important and I need to talk to you about it today.” He shook his head slightly, exacerbated, then turned from you and headed up the stairs toward your bedroom.

Fine. If he wanted to try and ignore you, you were going to make it near impossible for him to do so. If constant prodding is what took to get him to pay attention to you, then that’s exactly what you would do. You needed him to talk to you, scream at you, something.

Tyler trudged black down the stairs a few minutes later, having changed into sweats and a worn t-shirt. He sat on the couch (the opposite end from you, of course) and focused his attention on the TV. Shamelessly, you scooted closer to him until your shoulders were touching. The small amount of contact was probably the most you’d had in almost a month and you missed him. Tyler sat up straighter and leaned slightly away from you. It hurt, sure, but you were determined to keep going with your plan.

“Do I smell bad or something, Ty?” You tilted your head to look him in the eyes, but he didn’t return the gesture.

“Nope.”

“Is something wrong?” You knew there was, but you’d do him the courtesy of acting as if you didn’t know.

“Nope,” He returned bluntly, “just tired, like I said earlier.”

“Do you want me to give you a massage? That always seems to help.”

He shook his head without a word, keeping his focus on the TV screen. Okay, time to kick it up a notch. You pulled out your phone and opened snapchat and selected the puppy filter. Quickly, you turned the camera toward Tyler and started a video where you zoomed in on his face. Finally, he turned to look at what you were doing, which activated the filter and turned his scowl into a much cuter puppy scowl. You let out a childish giggle and posted the video to your story, knowing that that would only agitate him further.

Tyler shifted in his seat, letting out a sigh so heavy that it sounded more like an annoyed groan. However, he still wasn’t talking. For your next trick, you leaned your head on his shoulder and made sure to nuzzle into him a bit to really piss him off. If there was one thing Tyler hated, it was being smothered while he was angry. Still nothing. Well then, time for your final act.

Tyler clearly wasn’t in ‘the mood’ at the moment and if anything, it was probably the last thing on his mind. He was angry, and tired, and didn’t want to be around you for whatever reason, so what better way to push him over the edge? Slowly, you tilted your head up and began laying slow kisses onto Tyler’s neck. You made sure to focus your efforts just below his ear and overtop his collarbone, where you knew he was most sensitive. He moved his head away from you slightly, but you only used that as an excuse to move so that you were straddling him, now completely blocking his view of the television. Quickly, he moved his large hands up to grab your shoulders and pushed you away from him.

“Cut it out,” he scolded, “I don’t know how much clearer I can make it that I want to be alone right now.” His face was hard and unforgiving, an expression you’d only seen when he was upset during a game.

“But I thought you said that nothing was wrong.” You pouted, making no move to get off of him. You were taunting him, and it seemed like he’d finally realized that as his face contorted into a confused scowl.

“Is that what you’ve been doing this whole time?” He questioned loudly, standing up as he forced you off to the side of him. “You’re actively trying to piss me off? Are you that fucking desperate for attention that you cant even leave me alone for one damn day?!”

“One day?” You retorted, standing off of the couch the face him. “Tyler, you haven’t spoken more than five words to me in the past month!” 

He let out a bitter, empty laugh, one that you hated. He was livid.

“And so this is how you decide to get me to talk to you? By being the most obnoxious girl within 100 miles?”

“I didn’t know what else to do, dammit!” You screamed, and you could feel hot tears beginning to sting your eyes. “you wouldn’t talk to me no matter what I tried!”

“God,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair, an unforgiving glare still plastered across his features, “You’re so fucking immature that you don’t even know how to handle a problem without acting like a brat. Do you not understand how annoying that is? It doesn’t make me want to talk to you, it makes me want to get up and leave the damn house. You can be such a child sometimes, it’s like I’m fucking babysitting.”

“Oh, so that is the issue!” Your tone was accusatory, “You think I’m too immature.”

You had settled slightly, your demeanor softening after finally hearing the words you knew he’d been waiting to say. Tyler, however, didn’t seem like he was backing down.

“Wow, Y/N, do you want a gold star for your fabulous detective work?” You crossed your arms at his mocking tone. “Y’know, sometimes I think that they were right about you. Jamie told me that you were too young - he said that you would a pain in the ass, because 20-year-olds are fucking stupid when it comes to dating - and he was right. My mom and both of my fucking sisters told me that it wasn’t a good idea to get involved with a girl so much younger than me and I should’ve fucking listened.”

Tyler’s face was red and you had a couple tears running down your cheeks by the time he was done.

“Oh, give me a goddamn break, Tyler! You’re such a selfish ass sometimes, you know that?” He opened his mouth to retort, but you cut him off. “I didn’t do anything wrong. Nothing at all! I was being a good, supportive girlfriend and then one day you came home and just decided to pretend like I didn’t exist. I was there for you when you needed me to be! When you came home after a bad game, whining like a baby that it was all because of shitty refs, I was there to console you! Not once did I complain when you drug me out to go clubbing with you and the boys after I’d had a full day of classes and work! Not once did I sit you down and tell you about how terrible my day was, because I cared about you first! I always put you first! And instead of repaying the favor like any other boyfriend would, you cut me off and acted like it was my fault! If you wanna talk about who’s immature, take a good hard look in the mirror because I’m not the moody, narcissistic prick in this relationship, but that’s what you are right now!”

You let out a heavy breath and walked past Tyler to go upstairs. He made no attempt to speak, nor did he try and come after you. You knew him well enough, and when Tyler was silent like that, it was because he knew he was wrong. You walked into your bedroom, shutting the door behind you (after the dogs had followed you in, obviously). You needed time to cool off and he needed time to reflect. Once you were changed into your pajamas, you sat on the edge of the bed and allowed yourself to shed your remaining tears. By the time you’d calmed down, you were simply exhausted. It was still only mid-afternoon, but you didn’t care. You crawled into your side of the bed and flicked on the TV, ready to settle in for the day. However, a soft knock at the bedroom door and Cash’s soft whimper caused you to get up again. When you opened the door, you were met with a sheepish-looking Tyler, his hand scratching at the back of his neck and an apologetic look on his face.

“You’re right,” he sighed, causing you to raise your eyebrows.

“Good start,” you chided, “what else?”

Tyler let out a quiet laugh at that - he always did have a thing for your “strong personality,” as he called it.

“I’m sorry. Like, I’m so fucking sorry, Y/N. I’ve just been under a lot more pressure at work recently, y’know with management up my ass and all that. I know that that’s not an excuse, and I shouldn’t have have taken it out on you, but lately I’ve just been feeling like I’m not at my best and I guess I just didn’t want to disappoint you too, so instead I figured I’d just ignore you. I should’ve just sat down and talked to you about it, and I was the immature one because of that. About what I said earlier, I didn’t mean it. I love you with everything that I have and your age isn’t an issue for me, I was just pissed off. And for the record, Jamie and my family love you too, you know that. I was just being a dick and wasn’t thinking about what I was saying.”

You nodded carefully, allowing the silence to settle before you spoke again.

“I appreciate that, Tyler. With all due respect, I did mean what I said. You’ve been really selfish just ignoring me and it hurts. It hurt me to think that you were going to break up with me - to think that you were just giving up on us.” 

Your eyes welled with tears again and Tyler moved to envelope you in a hug. You let him.

“I’m so sorry, baby. So fucking sorry.” You could tell that he was near tears too, his voice shaky and breaking. “And I promise you that I won’t ever make you feel like that again. I understand if you still need some time but I’m here if you need me and I’m not going anywhere.” 

You pulled away from him gently, taking a moment to simply look into his eyes before leaning up to connect your lips with his. The two of you melted into the kiss right away, Tyler’s hands moving to cup each side of your face as your hands draped loosely around his waist. When you moved out of this kiss, you were greeted with Tyler’s soft smile. It wasn’t a smirk like he sometimes did after an intimate moment, but a simple, happy smile. You returned it.

“Can we just go lay down? We’re both sleepy and I miss you.” You pouted your bottom lip slightly and he couldn’t help the laugh that resonated through him.

“Yeah, of course, let’s go to bed. I miss you too, my love.”

[mysmedrabbles]

Broken - [Yoongi x BPD!Reader]

requested: by @edgythiccboi (request is pictured above)

a/n: long overdue and with about the most rough drafts ive ever written for something, its finally here! i hope you enjoy and it takes your mind off of some of the hurt from your past and present. know that the whole of the bpd/ptsd community knows what you're going through and supports you (even though we're all just a bunch of bamboozled and 3dgy kids)

warnings: quite realistic description of a bpd episode, tiny self harm mention, some splitting, self deprecation (it ends in fluff i promise)

-ghost mod alex

-hollowed lungs took struggling breaths in the condensed room, steam and water droplets covering every surface like a disease, a disease from which you could not get away from. you sat on the edge of the bathtub, wheezing into seemingly nothing, chest heaving as you strained against invisible bonds, tying you to the tub, restraining you in your own mind, a prisoner of war against your past.

-a familiar pounding in your head clouded your thoughts, and you could feel yourself spiraling through various personas, each personality you'd tailored for everyone in your life; it hurt too much, it felt like you were being pulled in a hundred different directions.

-who were you today? the bubbly friendly girl in the back of the class? the dark, almost suspiciously angry person, hiding in the shadows? maybe just a quick witted friend, always there with a funny rebuttal, making everyone laugh but yourself. what was the point of "being yourself," and "living life," when you didn't even know who that person was? that person you could have grown into died that day, the day,,, the day it happened. 

-you'd been lucky enough to have survived, to live to today, but what was the point of it all really? 

-you stared at your shaking hands, and for a second you see blood, draining you of your life as all you can do is sit there and watch; but you blink and its gone, only a thin white line serving as a memory. 

-you'd promised him you'd never hurt yourself again, and a part of you knew that you should call to him, for he was only in the other room, no doubt writing another extraordinary song. he was always so smart, so sure of himself and an absolute genius. it wasn't an exaggeration when people complimented him on his music, it came naturally to him, he had a passion and he pursued it. 

-unlike you.

-who were you but a stain on his life? he'd be better off without you anyway. 

-a wave of rage came over you, and all you could see was red, red red red. How dare he not notice how in pain you were, not be here to comfort you and take care? Did he not care? was it all just a joke to him? did he even...did he even love you?

-you felt yourself spiraling further, physically bending over to the point of pain, the muscles in your lower back stretched from the lack of support. tears had started to pool in your open hands, and staring at them blankly you were only vaguely aware of choked sobs reaching out the doorway, small whimpers mixed in with cries as you tried to feel anything beside the pain.

-a small knock distracts you, cautious and questioning, and you know immediately that its yoongi. yoongi your sweet angel, the one who always made you laugh when you were feeling down, played card games with you when you needed a distraction, sung to you when you couldn't sleep, kissed your tears away no matter how many times they fell. you didn't say anything, rather let him open the door himself to see you sitting there hunched over, looking up at him with puffy eyes. 

-he assessed the damage first, scanning the bathroom for anything sharp, any blood or a wad of suspiciously thick toilet paper shoved forcibly into the trash can. upon seeing nothing of the sort his eyes soften, seeing you in your fragile state. he never thought anything less of you, in fact he always thought you were so brave to be alive, to still be fighting after all you'd been through. you were a pair of survivors, people who bonded not only over trivial things like favourite band and your shared humor, but the experiences the two of you had gone through added an extra layer of understanding to the relationship.

-he sits next to you quietly, letting you take a breath before speaking, his voice softer than usual, and yet still with edges of his usual roughness, but he's kind. He looks at you, and you can tell it's taking him all of his energy to not to reach to your face, wiping away your tears and holding you in a tight embrace. he knew the drill, and his main priority was your comfort. 

- "can I hug you?" 

-it's a small thing, but it's enough to bring you back to tears as you nod shyly, too afraid to speak. you close your eyes and you can feel his arms wrap around you, holding you securely close to his chest, steady rhythm of his heart beating against your own chest like a metronome. steady, present, there. he's whispering tiny comforts to you, affirmations of his love and your worth, that everything was going to be okay. you lean into his touch, closing your eyes hesitantly as your head falls on his shoulder, hiding in the crook of his neck. 

-he smells fresh, faint smell of laundry detergent intermingled with his pine shampoo, and something else; he smells like home, the smooth cotton of his plain black shirt on his thin frame under your fingers just adding to the notion of comfort, and your own sobs cant help but die down, calming under his soothing presence. you start registering his voice, his hand tracing soothing circles on your upper back.

- "it's okay," you hear him say, "you're going to be okay. it's over now baby, nothing can hurt you.. i love you so much... i wont let anything bad happen to you.. it's okay... you're going to be okay..."

-his voice drills a hole in your chest, striking a cord and unable to get it out as you struggle to catch your breath. He pulls away, making sure you see where his hands are clearly before cupping your cheeks, stroking away any stray tears. he examines your face soundlessly, giving you a chance to speak if you so choose. you study him right back; he looks tired, like he hadn't slept in a while, soft hair a very definitely natural shade of silver. He saw you revisiting the dark circles under his eyes with your own, and as if reading your thoughts he replies, "work has been a bit long, nothing else princess."

-you open your mouth to make a counterclaim, but he cuts you off gently, "I promise," he says, and yet you struggle to believe him.

-a small pause settles over the two of you, and you could see his sincerity in his words, mirrored by the gaze that falls upon you. sweet kind yoongi with his easily irritable self and cutting humor, his stoic side and his adorable smile which you swear could light rooms.

-did you really deserve him? how could someone as amazing as him be in love with someone like you? Even as you began to speak, you could already feel the guilt washing over you, shame at the notion of manipulation as you asked, 

-“Why do you love me?”

-yoongi smiles, just the tiniest bit as he pulls you closer to him, kissing your forehead, taking your hand in his before responding, “why do i love you? ah well thats a complicated question with too many answers,” he looks at you, hoping to notice a change in your expression, but seeing no results he presses on, “I love you because you’re you, because you get up every morning and face the world even though its told you repeatedly to stand down,” he brushes a stray hair behind your ear as he goes on, carefully as to not set you off in some way, “I love you because even though you’re characterized by a mental illness thats seen as horrible and dark you constantly show up with your brightest smile and kindness in hand, and theres never been a day where being by your side hasn’t been a gift. I love you because of the way you’re attentive, how kind you are to complete strangers, your smile when you think no ones looking. the way you doodle in the corners of my lyrics sheet and fall asleep next to me at the studio when im up late working.”

-he shifts, fully facing you, tilting your chin up so you’re looking him directly in the eyes, piercing into your soul, trying to bring back any piece of hope you have to the surface, “I love you because theres that insatiable force pulling us together,” he playfully tugs on your arm, earning a teary chuckle from you as you look away, feeling the tears start up again. damn him and his talent with words.

-he’s just saying that because you asked him that

-your brain, a genius

-guilt courses through you at his words, a stab to the heart marred by the sweet tone of lies. this was manipulation. great. you’d manipulated your way to validation was an excellent girlfriend you were, truly inspiring. You feel the headache start up again, but yoongi catches you, placing his hands firmly where your shoulders connect to your neck, seriousness overcoming him as he cuts off your thoughts, sword at the ready, “I’m a logical person y/n, you know this, you say this to me all the time, and I wouldn’t have said any of this if it weren't true.”

-he searches your expression for anything, a twitch or a change, and is surprised to have you curl up in his arms, burying your face in his chest as you breathe for seemingly the first time since the conversation started, letting a full sigh as you try to clear your head, willing to pay anything to just believe his words. yoongi pulls away, hand running softly through your hair as he admires you. he slowly leans in for a small kiss, not passionate, leading to nothing, but just a kiss to let you know he’s there, and he’s not going anywhere and for now, just knowing he’s here is enough

-after what seems like forever of him holding you, the rim of the tub digging into your thighs, he presses a gentle kiss on your temple, intertwining your fingers with his before he stands up, extending his free arm to help you up. “come on princess, lets go to sleep,” is all he says.