#but what i dont know is if ronan is actually *out* to anyone or to himself

[jacqcrisis]

Since he's dragonborn and speaks Draconic, Ronan often swaps between the two when writing in his journal. Mostly it's in Common, but if it's something very private or spicy, he'll swap to draconic in case any rogues with sticky fingers or nosy tieflings try and snag it from him. Very frustrating for said parties for a variety of reasons since inbetween very dry 'we did this today' text, his little stick figure diagrams of action, and sketches of wildlife and his companions, are long sections in a language no one in the camp can read but you know say something interesting.

On top of that, I think it'd be cute if early on, after Astarion starts with all the faux endearments, Ronan lets slip one of his own in Draconic. It's mostly a joke and partially an accident at first and he was sheepish about it for a bit because it seemed presumptuous given the circumstance. When he realized no one, especially Astarion, knows what's he's saying, he starts using it more and more, much to a vampire's frustration.

Astarion asks him what that word means and if it's an insult or demeaning in some manner. Ronan's being tight lipped about because that would ruin the fun as it clearly bothers Astarion in some insignificant, harmless way. Even after the whole confession thing and now they're in some kind of relationship and said endearment is basically all he's referring to Astarion as, he still won't tell him what it means.

At this point, Astarion assumes its just a nickname or something considering how long Ronan's been calling him.... whatever he's calling him. Though any time they find themselves in a library, he is not so subtly looking for anything that may help him translate...

[lizard-shifter-noms]

Wayward Waters Chapter 17

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Hello everyone! Chapter 17!

this Story contains Vore, Dont like dont read.

have fun reading!

and as always Reblogs are appreciated! (Also ASK’s are open so feel free to bother me!)

AO3 Link for those that prefer the layout there;

AO3 Wayward waters

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Having gotten whatever they needed half of the crew of the Halcyon followed us to the Call Of The Damned,  which looked as imposing as ever.

Boarding the ship I could see Ronan getting tackled by Shalimar,  who after a hug decided to throttle him.

Yeah not my problem, also probably deserved.

Ignoring that I went to the front of the ship, where Cassidy had stood after Grella first emerged from Graves keep.

Should I tell him about the encounter I had with her? 

And what she'd told me? 

Ultimately he probably already knew what Grella had told me so there wasn't really a point.

The only thing I noticed here was that they had a pretty short Bowsprit compared to every other one I'd seen but that was all.

“Do you like sitting at the front of the boat?”

Came it from Robin who had followed me, heaving himself up to sit next to me.

“Sort of, i just like knowing where we are going, last time i didn't pay attention and couldn't even tell anyone where i was supposed to go to”

Also I was now pretty sure the stupid mast had given me a concussion, though a bit late for that now.

“Right, that probably sucked, wait what did you tell them where you wanted to go then?”

I shrugged, moving both legs to face the ocean.

“Back to Kamerasca, i figured if i couldn't manage to get to wherever you are i could at least wait back home,  i mean better than nothing right?”

Robin nodded to that.

“That's true, but i was really worried, i saw how the mast fell on top of you, and then you just didn't resurface, and then Rikaad wanted to help the sailors and i had to cling to him so he wouldn't run out again”

He had by now drawn his knees up to his chest, hugging his legs.

“Well, it turned out alright in the end, though very chaotic,  i'm still not sure if that all was even real”

I moved to mess up his ginger hair and he stuck his tongue out at me.

“If you mean the Kraken at the weird island, I've seen that too! Though i do wonder how all those little fires are doing, i mean they just wanted to warn us”

“Eh, they're fire they probably went somewhere that's a lot more dry than the ocean, also the island is called Graves Keep”

Probably because of all the shipwrecks that they couldn't really get to on account of the aforementioned Kraken.

“Mhm, what do you think Naroa island is like? I mean it is a colony of Kamerasca, do you think it'll be like back home or different?”

Good question actually, I didn't know very much about it though.

“Well, no idea but I think a good few things will be like Kamerasca,  it WAS built by citizens and volunteers as far as i know,  So I guess at least the architecture will be similar? 

But it's also an island so they probably had to modify stuff as well and built a few things that probably don't exist in Kamerasca”

It would make sense if they had taken what they were familiar with and modified it to fit their needs in the new place.

“Well, they probably don't have a castle as big as back home! 

I know the island is twice as big as Kariba island at least but a castle would take up so much space!”

That was true.

“Yeah, though I'm sure they at least build the mayor some stupidly big mansion or something! You think we get to sleep in that?”

“Yeah! It's probably built right at the beach! Oh we could go collect more seashells! You already have some cool big ones! I want some too!”

We talked and talked about what we thought the place looked like, which drifted quite a bit towards the end of the day with more and more unreasonable or straight up impossible things.

At some point as the sun started setting someone threw a stick at me.

Well, ‘someone’ the only one that could manage to get a stick out here was Jamie, who indeed was cussing us out and telling us we were missing dinner.

So we went to get that, which at least did not feature hardtack nor soggy bread to my relief, and then got shooed into a cabin to go to sleep.

I could hear though that Akeem was telling Cassidy he didn't need a cabin and was fine staying outside and keeping an eye out.

The end of that eluded me as Robin asked what part of the cabin would be his.

We hadn't even seen it yet so we walked there and Robin ended up getting the window bed.

At least that way I didn't have to deal with the morning sun shining into my face the next day.

Instead I was woken up by someone kicking the door open and for a strange moment I thought I was back at the castle in Kamerasca and that Nea had once again no regard for doors.

But no it was just Jamie who told us to get the fuck up as Naroa island was apparently within sight already.

Huh, the Call Of The Damned was fast, very fast.

Though not really a surprise,  The ship was big and I wouldn't put it past Cassidy to know some water spirits or even wind spirits that would help him out.

Walking half asleep I suddenly realized I had not taken the medication Oakley gave me, despite it being back in my possessions.

Well, there were no nightmares for once,  but I had the strange feeling that Grella had something to do with it.

It was debatable if letting her poke around my mind was a good idea or not but as long as that was all she did i wouldn't complain.

Besides, I was the one who let her so it was nobody's fault but mine.

But the island we were heading to was indeed already in sight,  and as far as i could tell had a more longish shape.

But it was indeed at least twice as big as Kariba island,  if not a tiny bit bigger.

Though it was more sparsely built on with more space between buildings,  the number of inhabitants seemed to be about the same, if not less. 

“Huh, not long till we reach it, hey how many people do you think got scared when the Call Of The Damned was first sighted by them?”

Robin giggled at that.

“Well it IS a scary looking ship! And probably the biggest one ever!

Let's go look for Rikaad!”

With that he climbed up on a crate, trying to spot the dark haired king.

“Robin, behind you”

Rikaad was in the completely opposite direction from where the ginger was looking, and right behind him though not on the crate.

“Huh? Oh hey Rikaad!”

“Robin don't climb random crates you don't know what's in them,  or if the wood will hold you”

Robin blinked and looked down at the crate he was standing on,  jumping off at Rikaads words.

“Oh sorry, didn't know, but hey we are already close to the island! 

Are you excited? I am! What are you gonna do first?”

Rikaad let the ginger ramble to the end before answering.

“I do admit to being intrigued,  i have never been here before and i am not entirely sure what i will do first, i'm waiting for more information at the moment”

Ah so he'd wait till we were actually there to make a decision,  probably a smart move not to set on one path if something else might come up as more important.

“How long are we going to stay there? A day or two? Or longer?”

Rikaad watched as the island got closer and closer,  appearing bigger the nearer it got.

“We will see, depending on what has to be done we could stay for two days or an entire week”

Also true, who knew how good the current mayor had been with paperwork, hopefully at least better than the old king, 

though it WAS hard to top that chaos.

As if reading my mind,  which was strange to think that someone, something? 

No, someone, else had already done Robin spoke just that aloud.

“As long as it's not as bad as the stacks of paper back home it shouldn't take long right?”

Rikaad just nodded at that.

“Hopefully so, though i am sure someone that would neglect the official affairs that much would have been replaced pretty quickly,  after all Kamerasca does get quite a few goods from this place”

Oh yeah, trading island and all that, hopefully the people here would be a bit more open minded about halflings and nonhumans.

They definitely were not, which was made very clear shortly after we debarked from the giant vessel.

Some onlookers could be heard shouting insults,  though strangely enough most weren't even aimed at me.

They were aimed at Jamie, who was right next to the way taller Akeem.

Rikaad did tell them to stop, though I doubted anyone here actually recognized who he was and that he was the new king.

Then again he wore no crown, only had once or twice.

Someone threw a knife at them, shouting something that sounded like 'Stupid Zoa’ but I had no idea what that last word meant.

Before I could think to ask anyone, Akeem had left the convoy to the mayor's abode, grabbed the knife thrower and tossed them a good twenty feet into a little stream where they landed with a splash.

Someone else tried to stab him in retaliation but the short sword didn't even scratch him, he gripped it and squeezed, the metal bending under his fingers like crumpled paper.

After that he went to stand back next to Jamie, who was hunched over and kept close to Akeem.

Ronan himself was somewhat hiding his ears next to Shalimar and Cassidy, wearing a headband that I was pretty sure used to be clipped to Shalimar’s messy belt.

Since I was pretty much in the middle of the people walking I had not been largely noticed, though the next street was a good bit narrower and people were still looking.

No hiding there.

Suddenly a triangle-esque hat was planted on top of my head,  hiding the top of my ears.

Looking forward again i could see it was the chicken guy,  who was still covered in layers and layers of fabric,  one of which was wrapped around his head, 

still hiding nearly everything aside from a strand of very dry hair the color of sun bleached flaxen and eyes that had slitted pupils with a way to green iris and no sclera to speak of.

I stared perplexed at him, the skin around his eyes wrinkling for a moment before he put a very thin sliver of gray silk over them, thin enough to look out of but also not letting anyone else see what his eyes actually looked like.

Smart, he must have been through something like this before.

I quietly nodded at him, making a mental note to properly thank him later if I got the chance, and of course give the hat back.

Also up close like this it was impossible to ignore that he was even taller than Fable, nearly seven feet.

And still holding the chicken,  who seemed content to just be held at the moment.

It wasn't long that we reached a larger and mostly circular place with a floor out of tile shaped rocks.

There waited some dapper dressed guy on a small wooden platform, confusedly looking at the people in the convoy before seeing Rikaad and bowing down in front of him after a few seconds.

The man himself was rather unremarkable, with pretty average features aside from a nose that seemed to have been recently broken.

“A good day and welcome to Naroa sir Rikaad Drayton,  King of Kamerasca, i am the mayor of this beautiful colony”

At least after that the surrounding crowd finally shut up.

Rikaad stood upright in front of them,  seeming taller in stature than even the guy on the small platform.

Rikaad sure had a way to make even the tallest people seem small next to him.

Must be the confidence,  he had way more than i did, or anyone else i knew really.

Even the mayor shrunk back a little,  walking off the podium to meet at eye level.

Well, eye level was good, Rikaad was about an entire foot taller than the man with the broken nose.

The Mayor started rambling something about how well they were doing aside from the pirates, which we had already dealt with, well Grella had dealt with them, and the people of Naroa might not even know that they were gone yet.

Rikaad simply watched and listened as the mayor praised every square of the island, which to me came off as that the mayor just wanted to look good.

Well, he kept rambling until a blonde woman walked out of the crowd with quite a few parchments in her arms.

She looked oddly familiar as well, kind of like a paler and taller Shalimar, probably her mother, whatever she was doing here.

The mayor stocked in his weird ramblings and praising everything to angrily point at the woman, shouting.

“That's the woman that broke my nose! Guards! Get her!”

Before anyone could properly react Rikaad had told them to put their weapons away, taking the parchment that the woman held out to him.

He read aloud a list of offenses, quite heavy ones as well,  including trafficking, murder,  and things that made at least two people in the crowd throw up.

Rikaad then looked the mayor straight in the eyes,  his own as icy as they had been back in the snow.

“Did I miss anything? 

Or do you spare us the paperwork and plead guilty?”

The mayor had gone into a fight or flight stance, frozen for just a moment before rushing forward at Rikaad with a knife.

He didn't get far with that as his pants caught fire and he got attacked by an oversized chicken that apparently could breathe fire,  because why not.

Sad to say it wasn't even the strangest thing that had happened,  also Shalimars mother shooed the chicken off only to punch the guys nose again, yeah that would not heal correctly anytime ever.

Rikaad ordered some of the surrounding Guards to toss the,  now former, mayor into jail, leading the rest of the people that came here with him to the biggest building.

As expected it had been used as the living place of the mayor,  though not anymore now.

Rikaad told us to take a break and that he had to carefully plan what to do now, go over the information the woman, who was named Marianna, had given him.

Marianna herself walked up to Cassidy, socking him in the jaw before pulling the taller man closer to her and kissing him.

I politely looked elsewhere.

There was quite an evident semblance to Shalimar, and not just the appearance.

Since nobody would try anything dumb as long as we were here i decided to hand the hat back to the Chicken sailor,  and finally ask for his name.

Robin had immediately taken a liking to a dog that lived here,  playing with the curly tailed canine.

Yeah he was fine, now where did the chicken guy go?

Looking around my eyes fell on Akeem,  who after noticing silently pointed at a balcony door.

Since nothing was going on and my presence wasn't needed I went outside as well,  seeing the man in layers and layers of fabric lean on the balustrade.

How the fuck did he not get a heatstroke?

I carefully took the hat, which was a little too big,  off and handed it back to him.

“Uhm, thank you for the save there, I'm sure I would have gotten stuff thrown at me as well, what's your name? 

I don't think i heard anyone say it”

He put his hat back on, tilting his head.

“That's because i don't have one”

My brain buffered for a good moment or two,  how could one NOT have a name?

“What, wait what do people call you then? 

How can it be that you don't have a name?”

The man tilted his head to the other side.

“You better be careful when dealing with Fae and how they word things, if they ask you for your name you better not give it,  sometimes they even trick their own brethren to give up their name”

I HAD heard of Fae taking peoples names,  but that they did it to their own kin was new.

“Oh, well getting the name of a Fae cant be easy,  you must have been tricked badly huh?”

He took his hat off again, pulling an arm completely out of the fabrics he was covered in, revealing a pale,  four fingered hand that seemed strangely chitinous.

“Oh yeah my sister had a knack for getting what she wanted,  Did you know Elves aren't actually Fae? 

Fae are never so naturally human like, Elves however are”

I stared at him, at probably the only true Fae I'd ever see in my life.

“I always thought it strange that most depictions of Fae had some insect things about them or horns while Elves didn't,  but that's new information to me,  wait what are Elves then if they aren't Fae?”

He shrugged, gripping the balustrade with his chitinous segmented hand.

“Not sure, but Elves are not Fae,  though they might be a mix of human and Fae, or had been once upon a time when there was less hatred in the world”

If that was true then, then every Elf was also a bastard,  yeah no wonder they had obscured that so much that they themselves believed them to be Fae folk nowadays.

“Well i guess i don't really have anything to compare,  but what you are saying does make some sense”

Though Fae being more insect-like did make sense,  most of the depictions I had seen, while crude,  had featured things like bug wings or multiple arms. 

Elves had none of those.

Well, what the fuck where Elves then? A question for later.

Suddenly I remembered something I had heard snippets of in Kamerasca a good two years ago.

“Hey about the name thing, why don't you get a new one? 

I've heard of people changing their names,  most times after a divorce though but it's just some paperwork,  well at least it's possible in Kamerasca, no idea about the isles”

I was not sure at all how the isles worked, not to mention that each island could have its own laws and the like.

The Fae man chuckled at that.

“A new name eh? Not a bad idea, I should have thought of that myself!

Though there are many to choose from, i will give it thought, and if i can't find an island to do it you might see me in your Homeland sometime”

Yeah, though I wouldn't doubt that Cassidy would specifically make that a possibility even if just for one instance.

“Well good luck thinking of a new name, does your chicken at least have one? Or is the feathery fella also nameless?” 

He laughed and picked up the way larger than average rooster with brown, orange and black feathers.

“This guy? Technically he's a Basan,  but yeah they look like chickens, eh bird either way,  his name is Basha because he used to Bash his head against me”

The Basan made some very chicken-like sounds,  bonking his head against the Fae man.

“There really are just things that look like other normal things but just aren't huh?”

“Well that entirely depends on what you define as normal,  your normal might be quite unusual for someone else”

That he was right in, especially in my case as the only other living Ardua had rejected to wear the bracelet, leaving it in Oakleys care.

“Yeah, you're right, also does sunlight hurt you like some Fae stories say? You are quite covered up, uh sorry if that's rude to ask”

He chuckled again, shaking his head.

“Curious huh? Well i can't blame you,  but the main reason im covered like this is that im ugly”

I stared at him, that being the LAST answer I had expected.

“Wh- what? That's a joke right? I know that big insect like things can freak people out but im sure its not that bad”

He full on laughed at that.

“Boy it's not because of me being an insectoid,  well i guess the mandibles would freak a good bit of people out,  but quite frankly, Nobody wants to see a mutilated man run around and showing off all his scars and stumps”

To emphasize he held out a second left arm right under the first, 

but the second one ended in a horribly scarred stump somewhere in the middle of elbow and where the wrist should be, the rest of the arm also adorned in strange silvery scars that had a slight bluish tint.

I stared at it confusedly for a second, so what? 

“So? If people don't want to see that they can look somewhere else, like, don't go out into the public if you don't like seeing people being people, also i don't think anyone seeing that would think you did that on purpose”

Now it was his turn to stare confusedly at me with his sclera less way too green eyes.

“I just mean, a lot of people have scars, i have some too,  namely on my back and shoulder, and one time some guy stole one of my kidneys so there's that one too, i don't think that scars necessarily make someone ugly or less of a person,  it just- it just shows you've lived”

He tilted his head,  at an angle that would probably have broken my neck if I tried it.

“It does sound like an age-old struggle of simply being deemed ‘other’,  I feel that you relate well to it,  even if your struggle with being ‘other’ has been different.

I suppose listening to those deemed ‘others’ would show things about myself I was not aware of, or would never be.

Also someone stole your kidney? How does that happen?”

Huh, yeah it was probably no matter what kind of ‘other’ one was,  they would find the same or similar reasons to shut those ‘other’ out any way possible.

Also of course he had to ask about the kidney thing.

“Yeah, some wannabe alchemist got it,  though i punched his face before he got anything else, i actually have no idea what happened to the guy, maybe he poisoned himself”

It was likely, that or someone else lynched him considering he'd been quite an asshole and did say something about testing on pets.

“Well, it looks like we both survive when we have to”

The Fae man stared out at the ocean,  gently scratching his chicken’s err, Basan's Head.

Then he ripped the cloth covering the bottom half of his face down, revealing what was indeed mandibles,  though more thin and boney and halfway folded into his maw.

One of his cheeks had a hole that was held shut by stitches and the other half of his face looked like someone had held a burning hot horseshoe against it.

Wait, iron, that was an iron burn, ouch, Fae did NOT take well to iron.

Aside from that there was a long and jagged scar going down the side of his nose, having blinded one of the secondary eyes under his normal ones, both of which were sewed shut like the hole in his cheek.

That man had been tortured,  There was no other reason for things to look like that as even multiple accidents wouldn't cause an iron burn this deep.

“I said i was ugly”

“What? No i'm just-i've never actually seen a Fae before, you weren't joking about the mandibles huh? Though i didn't think they'd be so thin”

He smiled, his face twisting weirdly around the scar tissue.

“Oh i suppose one would expect something more spider like,  however Spiders are arachnids and not insects,  ticks are also arachnids, but yeah i can move them individually”

To prove it he stuck one out and ‘waved’ with it,  then doing the same with another one.

“Wait, how do you eat with those? 

Don't you just bite your own mandibles while eating?”

“That's the question you ask? 

But yeah i guess sometimes i bite my own mandibles, though don't tell me you've never bitten your own tongue while eating”

Fair, to him it was just one more appendage he had,  not anymore strange to his own body than my tongue was to mine.

“Yeah fair, one time i nearly bit a chunk off because i fell out of a tree while eating, not exactly my smartest day”

At least it had healed quickly, but damn that had hurt.

“Oh we all have some dumb days,  and you know what i think i'm going to make this a smart one and go get some new shirts, and maybe a bandana for Basha”

“Wait then he's Basha the bandana wearing Basan all words with B”

He laughed and jumped on top of the railing, cradling said Basan.

“Oh I'm well aware! That's why I'm getting him one!”

With that he jumped down and I realized a bit late that this was built on top of a natural wall and thus went down about three stories deep even though it was technically ground level.

I rushed to lean over the balustrade,  but the Fae man had landed safely and was walking away while his Basan perched on his shoulder like a parrot.

Man the Islands were sure one chaotic place,  there was lots of stuff I would never consider trying on my own.

Then again the ones doing it weren't Human or elf and knew better what they were capable of than me.

Aside from Ronan maybe, he had to be frequently stopped from doing dangerous things that definitely would kill him.

I should probably head back inside,  I did want to see if the other ones were okay, 

especially Jamie who had rocks thrown at them among other things.

At least Akeem deflected the knife, and just threw a grown man twenty feet or so like he weighed nothing.

For someone that didn't even have muscles he was stupidly strong.

For a moment a horrified realization crossed my mind, if Grella was right about Magic Dying then what would happen to Akeem?

He was a statue come to live through some wayward magic, would he simply revert back to being a statue? Fall apart into parts and pieces?

Crumble to dust?

Or would it not affect him since he technically was some sort of gem and Grella did say magic could be stored in some of those.

I really hoped it was the latter.

NEXT / PREVIOUS / OVERSIGHT

[yarrowleef-babbles]

(it case it needs 2 be said, when i make speculative live-blog thought posts like this, i Do Not want anyone to confirm or deny or give me hints about what happens later, unless i specifically ask plz and ty)

ANYWAY jumping off that last post, one of the things I consistently saw in fanart before i knew anything was a queer pairing involving...SOMEONE, couldnt say who since my memory is being filtered through a me that couldn't keep any of the names straight. I ALSO could not for the life of me tell if it was *actually canon* or if it was one of those instances of a fan pairing getting really popular and taking over fanworks, even though its just ""subtext"" in canon (which often translates to 'the characters hang out a lot'.....i'm not *mad*, i have simply been mislead and then disappointed by canon when it comes to fandom habits like this more than once)

but it felt so consistent that i THINK it may have actually been based on canon. so i have spent this reading wondering who and how it was going to manifest

like is Ronan having vaguley homoerotic nightmares about Adam but twisted up and colored through the Catholic Guilt(tm) filter or am i reading it wrong lmao

[of-stars-and-moon]

fic writer interview

thank you to @hklnvgl for tagging me! 💛

name: asma or asu

fandoms (i write for): trc and the marauders

two-shot: i only remembered Shelter at first but turns out i have Kiss of midnight and All I Want For Christmas Is You as well! so yeah they are fun to write when the idea is better for 2 chapters

most popular multi-chapter: Home isn't always a place in trc and Run Away With Me in hp

actual worst part of writing: either when the english just doesnt happen or that frustration while editing when i cant understand whats not working

how you choose your titles: usually song lyrics that fit the story or they just come randomly sometimes

do you outline: for long fics yes, not for shorter ones

ideas i probably won’t get around to but wouldn’t it be nice: oh god so many! the top 3 lately though will be:

a pynch au inspired by that movie Ghajini where ronan is a famous artist and then rumors start that he is dating adam parrish who he, of course doesnt even know. because i love mistaken identity trope, but there are a lot of plotholes so idk

pynch royal au where ronan is the prince and adam is the new gardener which magical powers related to plants. its basically for secret relationship trope and the angst

pynch childhood friends au where the gangsey meet as kids in school and become friends, adam is fostered by persephone and the fox way ladies and its just something happy to think of yk. completely self indulgent

(sorry i didnt mean to ramble ajhgfd those ideas are just really fun to think of! and if anyone has any recs for those tropes, i'll be grateful!)

callouts @ me: oh well i should probably stop being so self conscious about my writing

best writing traits: see thats why this is hard adfkjds but dialogue i'd say

spicy tangential opinion: hmm idk if this counts but i actually do not get the point when someone calls someone's elses interpretation of characters ooc. like sometimes when characters act differently in fics than they would in canon, someone will say its ooc and i dont get it? because thats what fanfic is? putting characters in different situations and exploring what they do?

tagging @ashes-and-ashes @blitheringmcgonagall @magicienetreveur @willowbird @withrewings @flitwickslittlebrotha @catboyadamparrish if you want to <3

[piningeddiediaz]

I personally think Pynch anniversary is November 2nd because 1st is ronans bday and idk they kissed and all and probably talked through the night and i think it makes sense that the anniversary would be November 2 but thats just me. They’re basically together now for 1 yr and idk 1-2 months. Since they got together 1 yr before adam left and now it’s November/December again.

I have a question btw. Why do you think so many people seem to dislike Adam and/or Declan? I mostly am following pynch / Adam blogs but i see a lot of negativity too and idgi.

I personally like gansey and blue for example even tho they’re not perfect but actually no character is, not even adam even tho i love him dearly. But so much of the stoey happens bc of adam and idk…

Also I hate kavinsky apologists or people who say ronan had a crush on him wtf 😳 like. No. Kavinsky was disgusting and yeah maybe lost too but an asshole nonetheless. Ronan was already riding his crush on adam wave and he def wasnt interested in kavinsky except for the racing and dreaming convos ?! Sorry brain dump

yeah, I suppose that makes sense. depends on when you define their anniversary ig? is it an anniversary when you first kiss? when you admit feelings? when you officially declare you are together? I sure as fuck wouldn't know!

and oh boy, I have thought about why people hate Adam a lot and I think Adam perfectly described why in trb - "rags to riches isn't a story anyone wants to hear until after its done." I can't speak for everyone, but it wasn't until end of trb/start of dream thieves that I started to like Adam. I liked gansey immediately, but barely skimmed over adam's chapters until we got to his "what do you want, Adam? to feel awake when my eyes are open" because suddenly I could understand with vivid clarity why I was so eager to not pay attention to Adam - it's because he is real. gansey, at least at the start, was not. he was from the get go established to be the typical male lead. handsome, popular, rich. he's privileged but tries to be humble (even when he fails at it), he tries to be a good friend (even tho sometimes he fails at it). gansey was presented to be the kind of protagonist we are all familiar with. we've seen him in nearly every piece of literature. but Adam? Adam is real. Adam is like the average person. he doesnt get to hope for a future, he has to make one. he understands this fact, perhaps more and way earlier than any other person might, and he wont let anything stand in the way. in trb it made him appear to be cruel, because when people read books about friendship they want it to be all or nothing. you would give up your life for your friend. you would give up everything for them. and so the audience, who are already naturally inclined to immediately go towards gansey, are frustrated at Adam because he's your friend! he just wants to help you! it's not until adam's arc ends that people really understand where Adam comes from, why adam does this. you cant give something to someone who has always had nothing and expect them to not think it doesnt come with strings attached. in the real world, it always does. and I think that is why adam's character arc hits all the more. I thought he was an interesting character from the start, but it wasn't until dream thieves, it wasn't until Adam had really really started his character development, that I finally understood. to me, personally, thinking too hard on adam's character was uncomfortable because then I would have to face the reality of life. liking gansey was safer, because he is the prince. the hero. the one you know is going to make it out in the end. the one you're supposed to like. but then Adam, who was supposed to be the side character in gansey's story, makes his own. he becomes the protagonist, takes charge of the story and the narrative - he doesnt just get the title of protagonist, he specifically makes it for himself. and honestly, I dont think adam's absolutely amazing spectacular character development hits as well if you didnt dislike him at the start because, Maggie makes sure you inevitably have an 'oh' moment where you realise that its been about adam parrish all along. its one of the main reasons why I will undoubtedly say Maggie Stiefvater is my favourite author - she is so good at manipulating her readers!

the same goes for declan, I think. we're not supposed to like him, because aside from that one pov he has, we only see him from the perspective of people who don't like him. I personally liked Declan right from the start, but I am in the minority because I know what its like to have to parent your shithead brother because your parents wont. but we were intended to not like declan until we finally saw his story from his pov in the dreamer trilogy. again, expert storytelling by mstief.

(tho if you still dont like declan and adam idk what to tell y'all. maybe reread the book with critical thinking skills?)

and yeah, I have to agree with you there. I have a lot of problems with a lot of things gansey and blue - especially gansey - do (more or less all of dream thieves??? I dont think I will ever forgive gansey for the car convo) but I cant say that makes me hate them exactly, because they are very complex characters.

and yeah dont even get me started on kavinsky. tbh I have his tag blocked and dont ever interact with any k posts. he was gross and disgusting and im glad he died.

[jordantheehennessy]

hello good morning i have my iced coffee and im ready to talk about the love of my life <33

OKAY i actually screamed when adam appeared. like. yeah, i knew he was coming and everything. but when the narrative was like, and there was adam parrish, i had to pause it and scream a little because it had been so long since we’ve seen him and truly i do love adam so much. i also had chugged a couple things of coffee so my heart was already fucked up but that’s beside the point! 

the adam scense themselves were pretty short but i loved loved loved his interactions with declan. i also couldnt help but think back to dream theives when adam was watching declan and could read him like a fucking book and here’s declan now with adam being very open by adam’s standards and declan is still like ?? what fucking level is this guy even on??

hes really not physically present much but he’s extremely effective. i loved that bryde himself basically admitted that the reason there was no adam pov was because adam would have already figured it out which is just so. funny. but anyone saying that there’s no pynch in this book are wrong. pynch drama is the main source of ronan’s personal angst. like if you can’t see how much ronan cares for adam then i don’t really know what to tell you. it’s not even subtle?? between the agnostic tendencies bit and the work gloves bit it’s very obvious to see how ronan feels about adam and how much ronan’s insecurities are playing into it.

his one scene with ronan (yes there’s only the one) was so heartbreaking. adam talking to ronan without the accent was so so so much. like i completely understand why ronan was so thrown by it. because yeah, ronan is still living in the past and he has an idealized idea of what he wants things to be and anything that isn’t that is automatically bad and hurting him. which is not a good or healthy way to look at things and at the end of the day he’s just trying to protect himself so why should he grow past this? it’s always worked before, hasn’t it? why does adam insist on breaking things that were working perfectly fine?

assuming that adam got cut off from his body when the ley line went down and assuming ronan is still asleep and can’t be woken for whatever reasons (it seems that way anyway but, again, id need to relisten) it’s my professional opinion that they are going to find each other in dream space and have a very overdue talk about their relationship. maybe there will be references to the idyllic summer spent at the barn where they used to do this for fun?? it would be heartbreaking and i Need To See It. 

because the thing about adam and ronan (and well really all of them) is that at their cores they dont know themselves. or refuse to know themselves. they keep trying to find themselves in how other people reflect them while never really seeing anyone else for how they truly are either.  it’s like being surrounded by funhouse mirrors and picking whichever one makes you look the most appealing until you shift just enough and you hate the reflection. every single one of the characters are struggling with this and what is so funny is that of all the characters declan is the one furthest on the path to self acceptance. he’s at least pinpointed his fears and he’s slowly disentangling the whole fucked up yarnball of trauma that niall gave to him.  he’s by no means perfect and he’s still very much in the midst of a paradigm shift but he’s get a little bit of an edge over everyone else. well, actually farooq-lane is ahead of the curve there since she’s actively making decisions for herself.

BUT THIS ISN’T ABOUT ANY OF THEM SORRY

the point is: adam and ronan need to talk to each other holy lord please just communicate!! i don’t know if ronan ever mentioned to adam that he believes they’re going to get married and maybe he should mention that??? like, yes, adam has made it clear that he’s committed but they obviously have very different ideas of what that looks like and they really just need to get on the same page. adam also needs to come to terms that you can’t just try on faces for the fuck of it. and this isn’t even beginning to touch on how they might be trapped in dream space?? how ronan dreamt up his insecurities incarnate and now said incarnate insecurities is running around in the real world?? how ronan fucked with henness’y head and now he’s going to have to have a long talk with her too but he can’t do that until he comes to terms with himself and probably with adam too?? there’s just SO MUCH here and i’m really looking forward to the next book to see ho it plays out.

[maggielindemanns]

tag nine people to learn about their interests!

TAGGING: @ijzerengels @calumthoodshands @redrattlers @thenervousduck @arzkiya-hai @kritiquer @lesbianearn @sondergf @embeddedinmybrain @vexedtonightmares @tsjernobyl @bandsanitizer @tarcyjonsson and anyone else that wants to! idk who did this or not, sorry if you already did it but you may of course ignore me.

aaaa also thank you @ottelu for the tag! love u bestie <3

MUSIC

fave genre: r&b and pop, for sure

fave artist: ariana grande, halsey, savannah ré, normani, alina baraz, kiana ledé, chloe moriondo, troye sivan, the neighbourhood, bastille, 5SOS (& luke hemmings solo !!!!!! my baby) — basically i love music, we been knew, i have so many faves i can’t pick one

fave song: rn it’s for sure ur best friend by kiana ledé ft kehlani or girl on tv by chloe moriondo

most listened to song lately: according to last.fm, it’s wild side by normani agskdhsk i do wish she released it without cardi tho i’ll die on this hill idc its fine i just skip her part

song currently stuck in your head: you right by doja cat actually and ur best friend i couldn’t stop singing those two at work

five fave lyrics (in no particular order, there’s too many i love omg)

“i know i’ll never meet your expectations / but the picture that you paint of me looks better in your mind” — high, 5SOS

“you don’t believe in one divine / but can you tell me you believe in mine? / ‘cause you’ve been my god, my god / and when you’re gone i’m godless, i’m godless” — godless, banks

“you’re the only one, you’re the only one / i’m so wrapped up in a daze / hoping this is just a phase / but when all is said and done / i know you are still the one” — the only one, the black keys

“i get lost inside all the stars in your eyes, it’s a galaxy / you control the tide like the moon in the sky, you’re the gravity” — more than enough, alina baraz

“standing there, you look at me / understanding everything / yeah, it’s so fascinating / you patch up the blood and the cuts / but our blood got mixed up / so i guess we belong to each other” — love song, yungblud

radio or your own playlist | solo artists or bands | pop or indie | loud or silent volume | slow or fast songs | music video or lyric video | speakers or headset | riding a bus in silence or while listening to music | driving in silence or with radio on

BOOKS

fave book genre: idk i prefer like YA novels and romance i guess but idc really, i just don’t like fantasy stuff like harry potter or . historical fiction?? i guess you could call it?? (tried to read pride and prejudice for leisure ……….. boring as fuck like holy shit) or science fiction like boring boring boring idc no offense to anyone that loves it of course

fave writer: don’t have one really

fave book: aaaaaa i don’t have one of these either !! the one that always comes to mind though is giovanni’s room, but i just love that book, it was brilliant

fave series: mmmm i don’t really like series but caro’s got me into reading trc so i guess that’ll be my fave series once i’m done!

comfort book: rwrb <3

fave book to read on a rainy day: giovanni’s room sgsjdhsj i literally reread it bc it has some of my fave lines ever

fave characters: adam parrish, blue sargent, ronan lynch, gansey but he on thin ice, ari and dante, aiden navarro, alex claremont-diaz, charlie and nick (actually . everyone in heartstopper except the characters that are a plague <3), and more that i cannot think of most likely

five fave book quotes: (again no particular order i love so many)

“My dear fellow, you forget that we are in the native land of the hypocrite.” || “The world is changed because you are made of ivory and gold. The curves of your lips rewrite history.” — the picture of dorian gray, oscar wilde

“topography on the map of you, a world i’m still charting.” — red, white, and royal blue, casey mcquiston

“It is cruel to have made me want to live only to make my death more bloody.” || “I loved him. I do not think that I will ever love anyone like that again.” || “And here my baby came indeed, through all that sunlight, his face flushed and his hair flying, his eyes, unbelievably, like morning stars.” || “And there’s something awful about being at the mercy of a stranger.” — giovanni’s room, james baldwin (ik i cheated so bad w this SHUSH)

“And then I think we all realized what fools we’d been. We might get out sometime, but she was locked up forever in that body.” — girl, interrupted, susanna kaysen

“You and I, we don’t walk the lines. We just follow the echoes.” || “My mother used to say, ‘Don’t throw compliments away, so long as they’re free.’” His face was very earnest. “That one wasn’t meant to cost you anything, Blue.” — the raven boys, maggie stiefvater

hardcover or paperback | buy or rent | standalone novels or book series | ebook or physical copy | read at night or during the day | reading at home or in nature | listening to music while reading or in silence | reading in order or reading the ending first | reliable or unreliable narrator | realism or fantasy | one or multiple POVS | judging by the covers or by summaries | rereading or reading just once

TV & MOVIES

fave tv/movie genres: coming of age, romance (ehhh to some degree), i like indie movies, idk same as books i dont like science fiction, historical stuff, or fantasy im boring okay

fave movie: dont have one tbh

comfort movie: speech and debate or easy a

movie you watch every year: dont have one

fave tv show: dear white people or skam + remakes, i like other ones tho like stranger things

comfort show: skamverse <3 not exactly an answer but mhm

most rewatched tv show: skamverse or dear white people OR THE FOSTERS …. dude …….. i used to watch that all day every day then they took it off netflix …. now it’s dance moms i play for background noise and watch on occasion

five favorite characters: lionel higgins, joelle brooks, olive penderghast, lucas lallemant, eleonora sava, fallon carrington, howie (speech and debate), connor walsh, annalise keating, wes gibbins, archie coleman, ellie chu, beth harmon, lara jean covey (yes here i am overlisting again i’m so sorry)

tv shows or movies | short seasons (8-13 episodes) or full seasons (22 episodes or more) | one episode a week or binging (well …. i don’t binge actually i have a horrible attention span) | one season or multiple seasons | one part or saga | half hour or one hour long episodes | subtitles on or off | rewatching or watching just once | downloads or watches online

[parrishh]

i'm like, 90% sure all of the anons in my inbox right now are actually the same person so, if that's you, i'm just going to answer all of your mister impossible questions in this post since there are a lot of them and this is going to be really very extremely long

"Wait what why is Jordan awake?"/"Is the sweetmetal of declans picture helping jordan stay awake?"

i don't know why she's awake but i don't think it's the painting, because at the end of the book she's outside declan's apartment, not her own. i guess it's possible that she succeeded in making the painting a sweetmetal powerful enough to sustain her even there, but i feel like there's probably a different explanation. i've seen theories that she's inadvertently made herself into a sweetmetal by finally seeing herself as her own person rather than just a copy of hennessy, which is interesting

"And the things about the ley line Idgi? Hennessy wants to stop the power but for what"

i think hennessy thinks shutting down the ley line is the best (or even only) way to get rid of the lace. she hates herself for the lace to the extent that she doesn't even want to live anymore, so of course that's her primary motivation. she feels hopeless so long as the lace has power. she's desperate

"Why did he think adam was in on declans plan? I think the "oh" was more like oh you want to come with bryde of course...."

the "oh" is in response to ronan saying "i'm calling now. i need to see you", before there's even any mention of bryde. adam says "you're here? oh", not "you're here? why are you here?" the fact that he didn't ask why ronan was in town, the fact that he said an "oh" of realization instead, implied that he already knew why ronan was in town. and he could have only known by speaking to declan. i think it was a reasonable conclusion on ronan's part

"Ronan are you being serious????? Why should Adam/Declan drop everything and come fight with you - they didnt even know where you are, they don't know the plan. Then you accuse them of that Moderators plan without questioning them. And I mean, yes, Ronan is easily manipulated and he thinks everyone is against them and Bryde is the only one who cares but come on!!!!!!! Seriously, doesn't he get that he might be in the wrong????"

i mean, i think you hit the nail on the head when you said "he thinks everyone is against them." for a long time, he's been struggling with feeling alone, like he's a burden, like the people he loves don't really understand him. he's never had a healthy relationship with another dreamer, so it makes sense that he feels so isolated from literally everyone he cares about. and now he just found out two of the most important people in his life went behind his back to conspire against him (even if he doesn't have confirmation about adam, declan does admit to it over the phone) which is just...salt on a wound he's had since he was a kid. i'm not saying he's in the right, but i do understand why his immediate reaction was what it was. when you've been hurt like that, it takes some time before you can like, calm down and reconsider your own role in the situation

"Ronan basically dreamt Bryde in his worst dream right? Why does he still trust him"

i mean, i don't know how much we can believe what bryde says, but when he reveals himself as being ronan's dream he basically says that everything that he (bryde) wants, ronan already subconsciously wanted before he even dreamt him. that bryde wants it because ronan wanted it. to admit that bryde is in the wrong, ronan would have to admit he, himself, is in the wrong, too, and that's not easy. especially because a lot of his motivation is saving matthew and not wanting to live with the weight of matthew's life on his conscious anymore. especially because he's felt alone for so long, and now he just found out the first dreamer to truly make him feel less alone is his own creation. he's hurting. a lot. he will admit to being wrong in the third book, i think, but like i mentioned above, that kind of growth takes some time

"I think Ronan actually doubts Brydes plan too bc he thinks stuff like people built the dam, there are living things here, it cost a fortune..... and i personally never see a purpose in what they're doing bc bryde never tells them and ronan obviously doesn't know or he thinks he doesnt. I think he doesnt and he just trudts bryde blindly for now and his insecurities aka bryde take over and rule over ronan. Thoughts?"

i mean, i think ronan sees the purpose. here are his thoughts, directly quoted from chapter 17 when bryde is talking about restoring the ley lines:

"A world where Matthew could just live. A world where Ronan could just dream. A world where every dream was clear and crisp and easy to navigate, so there were never accidents or nightmares. He wanted it."

he wants, as i mentioned above, for matthew's life to not be reliant on his own (which i understand. that's a really heavy knowledge to live with.) he also just wants to be able to exist wherever he wants and with whomever he wants (thinking, for example, about how he wasn't able to get an apartment in boston in cdth), without constantly worrying that the nightwash is going to kill him. poor guy just wants a normal life

"Also did we ever actually see bryde get something out of a dream? Most work did Ronan"

this is interesting. now that you mention it, i don't think we do. supposedly he dreams the orbs, but i can't recall ever seeing that happen? i could be wrong, though

"And why is the nightwash mostly ronans problem? I mean hennessy and rhionna (?) had it very little and who knows if the other dreamers have it"

i think ronan is a much, much more powerful dreamer than any of the others. there's something...More about him. something special about being the greywaren. i don't know what it is, specifically, but i anticipate that's something we'll find out in the final book, and i expect it'll explain why the nightwash affects him more than it does the others

"Who the hell dreamt the mods"

i don't know! i think the most popular theory right now is that it was nathan farooq-lane. i'm not sure how that works, though, since they killed nathan and bryde took the sweetmetal off of lock pretty early in the book (unless nathan isn't actually dead, somehow) (or bryde is nathan, which is another popular theory). another theory is that it was ronan. like, he was feeling so alone and misunderstood that he accidentally dreamt his own persecutors? or it's possible that they were all just dreamt by random dreamers and that's why they felt strongly enough about the "cause" to become moderators, but that's kind of boring

"And why are R B and H so dangerous? Bc of what they're doing?"

yeah, and, i mean, according to liliana's visions, they have the power to end the world

"Can I point out that Idk what everyone is talking about, I dont get pynch possible breakup vibes at all from this book"/"Am I trippin or did I read another book? Because some fellas say there's no pynch"

i think when people say there's no pynch, they just mean that there's very minimal pynch interaction, specifically. because, yeah, even though they're both constantly thinking about each other, it is true that we only get one moment of them actually interacting (the phone call), and it's obviously not a positive interaction

i don't think anyone actually thinks they'll break up. at least, i haven't seen anyone say that and i've been feverishly reading everything under the mister impossible tag, so

"What struck me as really odd was that Adam bought this stupid 14$ waffle which he would have never done a few months back and I dont think he would do it now? 14$ is a lot of money esp for a waffle so why spend it on something as useless as this? And why do the others need Adams money? Are they all on scholarships? Was it just bc he had cash and the others didnt? And why is he treating them like his followers and they treat him as their guardian or whatever like he clearly needs to be honest with them"

okay, first off, i will say, as someone who grew up poor and, like adam, absolutely busted my ass in high school to get a good scholarship so i could go to college, the relief of actually getting that scholarship is...powerful. my financial anxiety definitely didn't disappear once that happened, but there was, at least in my experience, this feeling of "i made it, it's going to be okay now" that made it a little easier to spend money. i don't think it's that unrealistic that he, now having the security of a harvard education, would spend fourteen dollars on something he doesn't need every once in a while. it would be completely out of character for henrietta adam, yes, but it's a bit different now. plus, it wouldn't suit his faux Harvard Adam persona to refuse the waffle because of how much it costs

i think his friends are all a lot more well-off than he is. it was just that they didn't have any cash on them and the waffle truck didn't take card (also realistic, i never have cash on me so i always have to ask someone to spot me when a place turns out to be cash-only)

i think (a) they all look up to him because he has this really calm, cool and collected persona. more importantly, we can assume that they were all struggling with something when he met each of them, since they were all crying. now in swoops this guy who saw them upset and came to comfort and befriend them. of course they see him as something like a hero. and (b) i think he likes that. in high school, he was the one being rescued, not the one rescuing. i think he enjoys being the kind of person he used to wish he could be (ie. gansey. he's being gansey)

"I thought it a bit funny in a weird way that Declan talked about marrying Jordan…I can't imagine he was being too serious about it?"

no, i mean, i don't think he was literally proposing, not yet. he's just really happy for the first time in a long time (maybe ever) and, after a lifetime of pain and trauma and more responsibility than he ever signed up for, i don't blame him for wanting that feeling to last forever, even if he's not really thinking clearly

"Also I think it's amazing they make each other so happy but the ending makes me a bit sad or surprised bc shouldn't Matthew be his nr1 priority now?"

we only have jordan's perspective at the end, so when she thinks that it was clear declan had come out of his apartment looking for her, i don't think that necessarily means he wasn't also looking for matthew. i don't think it's fair to say that, in that moment, he should prioritize either matthew or jordan. he loves two dreams, so he can and should be concerned for both of them equally. i don't think one love is inherently more important than the other just because it's lasted longer or because it's family

[banana-hannah]

hold on... i just finsihed rereading the dream thieves..

(i wish i took screenshots since i had to return the ebook to the library... bear with me while i recount things from memory)

so kavinsky was known for his forgeries right? he was the one to go to for fake ids and things which we found out is because he isnt making them hes dreaming them.. but he still calls his dream things "forgeries".

well

when ronan asks k if he actually did try to kill his dad like the rumor says k goes "I dont try I only do" or something else yoda-esque

and then a little later k tells ronan that prokopenko is his favorite forgery which obviously means he dreamt him

SO

when kavinsky kidnaps matthew and almost kills him ronan says "you wont get away with this" k says "I got away with my father... I got away with proko.."

is kavinsky straight up admitting to murdering his father and replacing him with a dreamt copy? and i thought prokopenko was someone k dreamt up but was he actually a real person that k killed and then made a new one???

did everybody else know this and im just super late to realizing what was actually said???? if anyone wants to reply with screenshots to either prove or disprove that would be appreciated thx

[lizard-shifter-noms]

Wayward Waters Chapter 18

——————————————————————————

Hello everyone! Chapter 18!

this Story contains Vore, Dont like dont read.

have fun reading!

and as always Reblogs are appreciated! (Also ASK’s are open so feel free to bother me!)

AO3 Link for those that prefer the layout there;

AO3 Wayward waters

——————————————————————————

Walking back inside after this unusual conversation I kept an eye out for anyone really,  be that Robin, Rikaad or any of the Halcyon crew that came with us.

While I did not see Rikaad I did see Robin talking to Ronan,  both rambling about things, 

probably cacti as that was the only common interest I knew they had.

Well nice to see they went along,  Now where were the other two Crew members?

Walking outside into the needlessly perfectionist garden I saw Jamie perch on a fancy looking bench,  digging grooves repeatedly into the wooden backrest.

“Jamie! Akeem! There you are!”

Jamie puffed up worse than a startled pigeon,  claws digging even more into the wood.

“Calm down it's just me, and please don't scratch my face off”

Damn Jamie was really on edge,  well no wonder when the entire island had seemed hostile.

Jamie blinked and then stopped the threat display.

“FUCKING SHIT! If i knew this place was like this i would have stayed home and bothered the other two while working!”

I flinched back a little at the volume, damn they had lungs.

“Uh, well i'm sure Rikaad is about to talk some sense into the people here, might take a while though”

Jamie just scoffed, walking sidewards to perch on Akeem instead.

“Yeah sure, as if that would undo the shit they already did,  also do you really think people like that would just change their mind like that? And so fast? i'll tell you, they don't”

That I knew, I still didn't dare go alone to the town, or had actually been there aside from walking through with multiple people at once.

“I know, but at least some people are trying, so that's good right?”

Jamie just narrowed their eyes for a bit.

“Yeah sure, it's better than nothing, but it shouldn't have to be done in the first place, I hope we leave soon. 

This place sucks, they don't even have the creativity for good insults! Which somehow makes it even more insulting? Aaarhgh!”

Yeah considering Jamie could swear like a, well sailor, it was not really a surprise they'd take bad insults as even more insulting.

“Well, I mean that says more about them than you? Like uh, if they cant even come up with a good insult they really are just stupid, 

and it really shouldn't matter what they say cuz they're wrong anyway”

Jamie just stared unamusedly.

“Nice of you to try and cheer me up, but can it,  i've heard that all before, but yeah it shouldn't matter but it fucking does, and they keep getting more stupid people to believe it as well.

Sure i can deal with one or two stupid people but if ten of those are after me i cant do shit either,  and in the time you manage to explain to one of them why its wrong they get three more from who the fuck even knows where.

Worst of all is that in most places they face no consequences and that makes them feel like they are untouchable, and people like those do not like to have their worldviews challenged, absolutely complacent in their own ignorance to feed their stupid ego!”

It was a good thing that Akeem was made of stone as Jamie's claws scratched over the surface after the outburst.

But yeah, Jamie was right, it did look like that no matter where I went people did the ‘others’ and ‘us’ thing, though the only place I had not seen that was kariba Island, but that was probably mainly thanks to Cassidy and the self aware nature of the citizens.

“Well then i don't what to say, but i do know what it feels like to be the outcast, i still don't dare go near the town,  i'm still afraid someone with a meaningless grudge will just backstab me and leave me bleeding in an alley or something”

Jamie stopped being so puffed up.

“Oh right, you're from the place that build this place, damn that must suck, i guess im just fucking tired of living in fear, in all honest i just want to maul someone, do you want to maul someone?”

While Jamie did have some points I absolutely did NOT want to maul anyone.

“I don't like violence, so id rather not”

Jamie scoffed.

“Well the entire existence of people like that is based on violence! 

They want us dead simply for existing, and then cry when we defend ourselves! But i tell you you have to punch those people right in the face before they start getting more of them to wherever they are so they think twice about bothering you”

Valid advice, to anyone else.

I simply didn't want to hurt people,  but i was sure as hell not gonna argue with Jamie about that now.

“I guess, though i'm not really the punchy type, but i do know people that are, and i have no doubt that Nea would do more than just punch”

I shuddered at the thought of what I heard rumors say about her, apparently she was quite merciless even to the people on her own team.

I was glad that she had decided to like me and not beat me up.

While I spoke Akeem had gently grabbed Jamie's face with his free arm, which somehow actually worked to calm them down?

I would not try that unless absolutely necessary,  Jamie would shred me with those claws.

“I suppose we should all calm down for a bit,  a hot head is not good at decision making”

Jamie bapped their spindly leg on his head.

“I know the only one allowed to get a hot head is you when you're standing too long in the sun, also next time it gets hot enough to do it do you think we can get Yamet to fry some eggs on your abs? 

I'm pretty sure we forgot to put seasoning on them last time”

Of course leave it to them to try and fry eggs on a living statue because why not?

At least Jamie wasn't angry anymore,  well, just less angry there was always some level of anger.

Though to be fair I hadn't even understood half of the things shouted at them.

Jamie hopped down from Akeem’s shoulder,  perching on the bench again instead and grumbling.

“Half of these fucks would piss their pants if they ever met one of the Bigger Zoa’s anyway, not my fucking fault im tiny”

Tiny and filled with rage yes, also again that word,  what the fuck was a Zoa?

“Uh, what IS a Zoa? I've heard someone shout it as we walked here and you just mentioned it again”

Jamie stared at me as if I was an idiot, which to be fair I sometimes was.

“I'M a Zoa dumbass, an Imik technically also? I think? 

Hes Hybrid though, also Nymra is Zoa too”

“That explains nothing”

They stared with a deadpan expression.

“Zoa are the people that have animal traits, whatever those might be, 

So things like Harpies, Avians, nagas and centaurs and so on are all considered Zoa, basically everything that's got a mix of Human and animal traits, I have my bird legs as you can see! 

Imik got his fish scales and gills and Nymra is a Harpy,  well i guess by that logic the fucking Kraken is Zoa as well”

They shrugged at that.

Huh, so Zoa was just a term for the ones with the animal traits? 

“So it's just a word for people with animal traits? 

Is it a mean thing to say or not? Also yeah if those guys had seen the Kraken they would have fainted for sure”

Jamie just tilted their head.

“Eh it's not a slur, not really at least, i guess it depends on how you say it, but then again i've heard people use weird things as slurs”

Yeah I was not about to ask about those.

Before anyone could say anything else Shalimar pelted something at Akeem and yelled, dragging a breathless looking Ronan by the collar.

He did not look like he was getting enough air.

“HEY THERE YOU ARE! The boss guy said he was gonna tell who's the new mayor tomorrow! Who do you think it'll be?”

She skidded to a halt maybe a few inches away from where Jamie was perched, receiving a hefty bap on the head from one of Jamie's spindly bird legs.

“We don't fucking know anyone here, why should we know?”

“I'm not asking you! I'm asking pointy ears here!”

She turned to me, clearly just wanting insider information ahead of time, probably to tease other people.

“What? No idea i don't know anyone here either,  i didn't even know what Rikaad’s plan was coming here, go ask him”

“I already did! He told me to leave! Also my Dad is trying to catch me and send me back onto the ship, don't tell him I was here!”

With that she left, dragging Ronan still with her.

We stared for a few moments at where she disappeared.

“Well Ronan is gonna suffocate like that, if he does i want to be the new captain!”

Jamie proclaimed, standing straighter on the bench.

Oh so Ronan WAS the captain, well just because he owned the boat didn't mean he was good at being a captain,  He got distracted pretty easily.

Akeem grabbed Jamie, their arms trapped at the sides.

“You would not exactly make a good captain either, i say we go and free him before he Does suffocate”

Jamie just huffed but ultimately let the stone man do whatever,  Which in this case was to carry the Bird legged maniac after wherever the clearly hyper Shalimar went to help Ronan not get strangled.

To be fair there wasn't much one could do against the living statue,  even swords couldn't scratch him and he had no problem tossing a full grown man twenty feet like he weighed nothing.

A good thing he was one of the calmer people in this rather hectic place.

“Donovan! Look!”

I turned around as I heard my ginger friend call me over, he was holding a bunch of flowers, ah he was making flower crowns again.

He stopped in front of me, holding up the brightly colored petals.

“They have so many flowers here! And most of them don't grow in Kamerasca! I wish I could bring them all back home!”

“Heh, if you take all of them the people here don't won't have any,  but maybe you can get some seed packets and then try to make them grow back at home?”

“Ohh good idea! Maybe we can take some seeds directly from the plants here! Come help me!”

I let myself be dragged through the overly perfectionistic garden, Robin showing me how to get a few seeds from the plants that did have them this early before searching around the manor to see where all the gardening stuff was kept.

We also did find some beehives in the far back part of the garden, the little fuzzy insects buzzing around and not paying either of us any mind.

Though we still kept a respectful distance to the hives,  really not wanting to be perceived as a sudden threat.

At the end of the day we had a total of maybe ten different flowers,  not a lot but surely at least one would grow in the slightly colder climate of Kamerasca.

We also got called into the manor itself, nobody really deeming it safe to stay outside at night, especially for me considering my pointy ears.

Which was fair, I had seen how people reacted to Jamie,  and if not for the Fae man putting his hat on my head I probably would have things thrown at me as well.

Hopefully he was able to find a name he liked.

Someone shoved us into a room all the way at the other end of the manor where barely anyone else was and I noticed that the ceiling here was pretty high up.

No doubt Rikaad had ordered for me to stay here in case I wanted to shift.

Did I want to shift? The last time I did I attacked a boat and lost a tooth.

The gap still felt weird and I was really glad that I had an extra pair that could replace the lost one.

Still, hopefully that would grow in fast.

I stared out the window for a few minutes before Robin's ginger hair appeared in the way.

“Are you okay? You've been, weird, is anything wrong?”

Well there were quite a few things,  but i also did not want to worry him, especially not before sleep.

“It's just been a very weird week, and i don't like the gap in my teeth,  i think i just need a break from the hectic stuff”

After this was over and we were back home I would definitely go into the forest and stuff my face into moss.

“Does the Ardua part of you not like the ocean?  I mean it is more of a forest creature”

That was also a point, though how far did the Ardua mix with the actual me? I would have to ask Oakley that.

“Honestly? No idea, I'm just glad I know how to swim,  maybe you're right though i do prefer solid ground to a boat by a lot”

On the mainland there was also a lot more space to do things than on the smaller islands here,  not to mention I was not familiar with the environment here.

“I also like Kamerasca more than this,  though they do have interesting plants here”

Suddenly he hugged me tightly, mumbling into my chest.

“I'm so glad you're okay, after you fell off i barely slept, i'm still afraid that i might wake up on the Victory Rose with you gone”

Oh, yeah he did see that pretty up close,  no wonder that haunted his brain.

“Don't worry i'm still here,  and I'm gonna make sure not to fall off again, yeah?”

He just mumbled something unintelligible.

“Want me to be fuzzy?”

He hummed an agreement and I had to pry him off before I could shift, the Ardua form just about fitting comfortably into the room.

Robin was immediately hugging my arm before I had even actually settled down, clinging to my arm as if I could disappear again.

Since he was clinging to my upper arm I couldn't exactly hug him,  so instead I used my head to gently squish him, making him laugh.

“I'm not a pillow!”

I let out a huff and turned my head more,  rapping the ginger with just enough pressure that he couldn't move away but still could shove it at my face.

“You are now!”

As far as I could see of him he had stuck his tongue out at me,  shoving playfully at my face.

“Hahaha, come on! I'll end up drowning in all that fuzz! 

And I managed to avoid that pretty good with water so far!”

Eh, it wasn't that much hair was it? 

I lifted my head regardless and he slid down to the floor in a surprised heap.

Then I immediately put my head down again, trapping him again and he squeaked in joy, now trying to tickle the underside of my jaw.

It was not effective, the opposite really.

Apparently the cat part of this form was more integrated than I had thought, and I ended up purring loudly as Robin continued scritching at the thinner fur of my lower jaw.

He giggled and kept doing it, considering he had admitted in the past to liking the sound that was no wonder.

At some point he had slipped out from under my jaw and was instead shoving at my face again, trying to shove the lip covering the gap where a tooth was missing away.

“Mhh?”

“I just wanna see again, you did have splinters everywhere so I wanna make sure there aren't any, also I wanna take a look at the new tooth!

You did say it was gonna grow back!”

Oh right, though there probably wasn't much to see yet.

“Sure, though i don't know if you can see anything yet,  i'm pretty sure most if not all of the new one are still in my skull”

I let him poke around a bit, and he actually managed to fit his entire arm into the gap, finding that incredibly funny for some reason.

“I bet I could stick my entire head in!”

“Yeah please don't, all my OTHER teeth are still sharp”

He just hummed in acknowledgement and tried to spy the new tooth growing out, to no success.

“Aww i can't see anything, but it kinda reminds me of a window! 

I bet I could look out from inside!”

Of course he would come up with something like that,  but to be fair he'd probably find it funny, and there wasn't really any other opportunity for it anyway as soon as the tooth grew back.

As expected he managed to talk me into it,  to be fair that wasn't exactly a hard feat.

And now he was laying in my mouth,  giggling over the fact he could look out like that.

After a bit I attempted to let him slide out again so he could sleep but he stopped himself by bracing against my remaining teeth.

I stopped tilting my head worried he might get cut,  letting out a confused sound.

“I- uhm, can i- can I sleep inside? Im- im still worried that i might wake up to find you gone, or get another nightmare from when you fell off”

My mind blanked for a millisecond,  though what he said did make some sense, at least regarding him.

Head said in the past he slept better when he wasn't alone,  and considering that after I fell into the water he had the room alone it was no wonder he had gotten nightmares.

Well it really wasn't any inconvenience to me so why not? 

If it made him feel better, strange as it might be might as well.

I gave an affirmative hum and instead of tilting my head even more forward I tilted it backwards,  letting the ginger slide into my throat before gulping strongly.

Swallowing two more times he spilled into my pouch,  immediately turning around and getting comfy.

I myself did pretty much the same,  tucking all limbs close and getting comfy as well on the floor.

“Got what you wanted?”

“Mhm, yeah, thank you, i don't think i’ll have any nightmares like this”

He yawned and slumped over,  the adrenaline from before apparently running out.

“Donovan? Why am I hearing two hearts? Are you okay?”

Oh he noticed that?

Well from where he was it was probably easier to hear.

He should probably explain.

“Oh, yeah, that, remember that I told you Ronan tossed an electric eel at me? Apparently the shock I got from that kick started my second heart somehow? But don't worry I'm okay, I mean two is better than one right?”

There haven been any problems with it aside from the initial confusion, and I was now pretty sure the nausea I had felt was from a concussion.

“Isn't it weird to have both-”

“Yes absolutely, i really wanted to throw up after waking up,  and it took pretty long for my brain to register what it was as well”

It really was weird, but I had gotten used to it pretty quickly, which was also a bit strange but better than feeling awful for longer.

“As long as you're alright, though it does sound funny”

Of course to him it would, though it probably did sound a bit funny seeing as they weren't exactly in tune, whatever function that had.

“I suppose it does? I'm actually kinda glad i don't hear my own organs all the time, id go mad”

Fuck knew if i did id stab my own eardrums.

“Mhm, that would get annoying,  and probably distract from talking to people”

Oh yeah that as well,  and some people were already bad at listening anyway.

I could hear Robin yawing again,  barely holding himself upright at all at this point

“Tired?”

Robin just hummed in agreement, yawning again.

I had to chuckle as the ginger stretched like a cat before settling down again.

Well it was late now, better i'd go to sleep as well.

“Goodnight then, wake me if you need anything”

Robin did not answer, already mostly asleep.

************************************************************************

Robin was glad Donovan had agreed to let him sleep in the pouch, he actually preferred it over having to sleep in a new and unfamiliar place.

And like this he didn't have to worry about Nightmares or Donovan disappearing again, he was literally all around him so there was no way he could manage to leave without Robin.

He twisted around until he got comfy on the warm flesh, feeling Donovan do pretty much the same outside on the floor.

Out of the two of them Robin had probably the better bed right now.

“Got what you wanted?”

Robin looked up at the voice, useless as that was in the darkness, and nobody could see him either anyway.

“Mhm, yeah, thank you, i don't think i’ll have any nightmares like this”

He yawned and laid back against his warm surroundings,  Strangely enough hearing two heartbeats?

“Donovan? Why am I hearing two hearts? Are you okay?”

He could feel the body around him shifting in confusion for a moment.

“Oh, yeah, that, remember that I told you Ronan tossed an electric eel at me? Apparently the shock I got from that kick started my second heart somehow? But don't worry I'm okay, I mean two is better than one right?”

Robin hummed, finding it strange but he was really no stranger to his friend's weird doubled anatomy.

And hey, if both worked now that was better right? 

“Isn't it weird to have both-”

“Yes absolutely, i really wanted to throw up after waking up,  and it took pretty long for my brain to register what it was as well”

Robin let out a laugh, of course it would be weird to suddenly have two working hearts when he'd lived this far with only one.

“As long as you're alright, though it does sound funny”

It really did, the hearts weren't exactly synchronized but both worked to push blood through the giant body around him.

“I suppose it does? I'm actually kinda glad i don't hear my own organs all the time, id go mad”

Robin did have to agree with that,  if he heard his own heartbeat all the time it would get annoying.

“Mhm, that would get annoying,  and probably distract from talking to people” He yawned again, sliding down the damp wall a bit more,  collecting in a heap at what was probably the bottom of the pouch.

“Tired?”

Robin just hummed in agreement,  yawning again and stretching once before curling up again.

He could feel the large body chuckle around him,  the walls slightly moving at the sound.

“Goodnight then, wake me if you need anything”

Robin mumbled something back but he wasn't sure if Donovan had heard it before falling asleep.

************************************************************************

The next time I woke up was by someone kicking at my outstretched paw.

“Oi, Fuzzbrain, get up, you missed breakfast and the bossman is having some sort of speech later to choose the new mayor or whatever”

I blinked blearily at the voice,  seeing Jamie rake their claws through my fur.

Could nobody send someone less chaotic to wake me up? 

First Nea and now this bird legged maniac.

“Mhm, gimme some time to get ready, i'll be out there in a bit”

Jamie shrugged and turned to leave, then turned back and rapidly bapped their clawed leg against my nose before hopping out.

“You ought to close your window at night!”

My head snapped to the, indeed still open, window.

Ah, fuck.

Well as long as it was only Jamie that knew it would probably be okay.

Probably.

Jamie wasn't the sort to go off and tattle,  or had at least enough mind to know what to shut up about.

Well better wake Robin up now,  i couldn't exactly go to that speech like this.

Poking at the pouch I softly called out to the ginger.

“Robin, wake up, Rikaad is doing some speech”

There was mumbling and he turned over, likely blocking his ears.

“That again? You really are not a morning person huh?”

Still, he had to get up, and I had to shift back.

“Come on, i have to shift back and i can't do that with you in there”

There was more mumbling and he seemed to finally wake up,  if slowly so.

“Mhm? What time is it? Why'd you wake me?”

I could feel him sit somewhat upright, still rather groggy though.

“We have to get up, Rikaad is doing a speech or something, 

and i have to shift back to fit through the door”

The door wasn't even half the size of the Ardua form, the room itself just barely big enough for it.

“Mh, okay, what's the thingy about?”

What did Jamie say again? New mayor right?

“Uh i think he's gonna appoint a new mayor, maybe some other things?”

He stretched and shoved a bit at the walls of my pouch.

“Alright, i hope if this is over we can go home soon, or at least go to a beach with nice seashells all of us together”

“eh if Rikaad wont come with i'll just drag him, or we can throw sand at him”

That made him laugh.

“With how fancy things he's wearing, it's gonna take forever to get out!”

“Yeah, speaking of getting out, your turn so brace yourself”

Righting myself as much as I could in the limited space I brought the redhead back up,  letting him slide to the floor where he gave a thumbs up.

Though he still didn't get up,  grabbing one of the discarded pillows and pulling it closer.

I poked at him with a paw, making sure every claw was retracted.

“Come on, we don't want to be late do we?”

“Hmmm fine, s’not warm anymore anyway”

With that he finally stood up, hair sticking out in every direction and making him look like a scraggly cat.

“Go brush your hair while I shift back, yeah?”

He nodded and yawned, walking out to get properly ready while I turned the bracelet gem and shrunk back into a more human size.

There was a mirror on the wall and after checking myself over I found that since I had slept as Ardua there wasn't much to be done.

Practical!

Now to collect Robin and head out for whatever Rikaad was doing.

Jamie really could have given a better explanation than whatever that was.

Eh they probably only halfway listened anyway.

NEXT / PREVIOUS / OVERSIGHT

[nialltlynch]

psycho killer qu'est-ce que c'esta | little patricide never hurt anyone | be careful how you touch mewe are parallel lines (we're never meant to cross) -- i am interseted by all of these omg

ahhhhhhh psycho killer is actually from like i think pre-cdth being released but the concept has stuck with me so anyway! ronan and gansey (who are married for one (1) joke) decide that they really want to know what happened to their dead friend Noah because like.  the cops were like idk??? so gansey, in his infinite wisdom, hires 100% totally real crime psychic blue sargent to find noah’s ghost and ask him what happened.  she’s absolutely - ronan, stop laughing - the real deal.  ronan thinks this is bullshit.  he’s like hey guess what i hired 100% NOT a psychic, just good regular detective skills, private investigator adam parrish to find out what really happened. anyway they all kiss at the end (except noah because he is in fact dead )): )

patricide i already mentioned but i forgot to put a snippy in so here have this:

There's a beach nearby but it's not a beach that most college students would enjoy.  It's made up of jagged sudden cliff faces and receding shorelines that crumble and drop into a churning slosh of water down below. Every year there's a new legend of a student who's drowned in the area.  In the summer the tide is deadly and in the winter, the water alone could kill.

Tom likes this beach.

touch!!! yes!!! that’s the one i just finished writing and i need to edit it and then i’m going to post it hopefully by this weekend!! i dont wanna give too much away (not that anything really happens alskdj) but it was born from the idea that declan is a weird guy but also unfortunately very fuckable.  ashley pov.  currently contains this gem of a line:

Ashley is pleading with the tiny Mitski in the back of her head singing endlessly about betting on losing dogs to please, please, please shut the fuck up.  She will not let this get wildly out of hand.

and parallel lines is my declan/blue baby that i have been teasing forever now but still haven’t finished the first part because i am in editing hell (^: 

[yarrowleef-babbles]

so the raven cycle was one of those series i occasionally saw people make posts/fanart about over the years although i knew Nothing about what the actual story was (got it mixed up with six of crows before i read that too, only knew them as "fairly popular YA fantasy-ish series named after corvids"... and the amount of times i called it "six of ravens")

i also had a terrible time figuring out who the boys were and how many there were and what their names were as a result. i just kept seeing the first names and last names used back and fourth so my brain contained a jumble of "adam ronan gansey parish lynch richard noah" and it was ANYONES GUESS what was a first name or last name and what the correct way to combine them was. i had no idea who the characters were so i couldn't connect them to anything (doesnt help that ronan is the only somewhat consistantly recognizable character, everyone else could be drawn identical for all I know. straight up still dont even know what adam/gansey/noah's hair colors are. Adam has been described as "pale/fair" and "brown" skinned within the same book i'm--)

this persistant name-blindness was hell when i started reading because it took me many chapters to remember which boy was which, i combined Gansey and Ronan together a LOT somehow. couldn't figure out who was related or what anyones relationship was literally had to look up a schmoop summary. this is largely because i didnt realize the POV was switching, i thought it was just Blue and One Guy. even now i am STILL swapping gansey and ronan's names around even though i definitley now know them as distinct people. maybe i will finally have it down by the last book lmaooo

usually name blindness isn't such a problem unless i'm watching like, anime, something with a lot of names that i am not familiar with and so don't stick in my head. but i guess these pretentious rich boys all also have names i am unfamiliar with so they blur asjssjsjdsjjdj

[geffenrecords]

killjoys 🔪🔪🔪🔪 now

GSHFNEOFNSLDMDSKDM PELASE

okay oh my god the killjoys i ffucking love them? theyre my ocs now actually gerard way gave them to me bc i asked nicely and also gave them a kiss bc im so nice. /j

but gawd where to start i.....basically made up an entire universe for them in my head bc i cant be assed to read the comics n the canon is soooo inconsistent i can do whatever i want. who's gonna stop me. huh. the publishing company hunts me down and says No. try me.

ummm anyway first and foremost they cannot die......like legit. sing dont exist wdym. it's some real the old guard shit actually 🤨🍷 idk if anyone here has watched tht but Basically the ppl can die but their wounds heal up instantly and they can just keep going [that movie was so sexy i reccomend it] n that's pretty much how i think the killjoys operate? it's a little sadistic tho bc theres really nothing like teens telling you all the graphic ways theyve been maimed and killed only to still b kickin.....no ones sure if the girl shares the same curse/power, and theyre too scared to truly test it.

but yeah they fuck around w it a lot ghoul keeps track of how many times they all die and jets like thats not funny and ghouls like im sorry i cant hear you over my winning streak. he gets to 69 and they have never seen him so happy hes sofucking annoying......but kobra also kinda doesnt take it seriously he purposefully kinda throws ghoul around like a ragdoll just bc he knows he can. to quote myself from one of kyrs and i's various conversations, "youre laughing. ghoul just died and youre laughing, kobra." u know how in the dream theives ronan throws noah off the fucking roof. yeah thats their dynamic.

can the killjoys actually die like in the old guard where they randomly stop healing? who knows? maybe theyll be like this forever, or maybe theyll slow down one day. who's to say they even age. not them.

anyway um on a less edgy note.........as for their backstories.....kobra n party grew up in the city definitely 🤨 no ones sure who stopped taking the pills first the memories are so fuzzy......what they both DO remember is doing hurried things at night like chopping all kobras hair and running as fast as they could into the desert and hiding out till they were found by dr d. i love their dynamic like yeas. party is an annoying whiny bitch who cries and is heartbroken easily and kobra is the human embodiment of B| but they love each other very much.......party holds kobra close when he cries and vise versa and kobra will never forget the things party did to make him feel so safe bc listen. that is their babie brother. they would die for him. kobra is so fragile at first like he'd never admit it but oh.....the way his voice shook when he told party hes a boy n im not going to touch on that for tht long bc that's embarrassing hiiii but kobra is So trans. look at him and tell me that is Not a transmasc as fuck guy. it goes over well tho bc party lives breathes and dies for kobra and their gender is also yes heheheh....... anyway theyre both found by jet and pony one day and dr d kinda takes em in.......theyre v v wary at first n party kind of glares at everyone the whole time and if they get too close to kobra they will Be Violent and kobra just sits very still the whole time but eventually they warm up and become all alive blah bla bla <3

and JET......MY BELOVED............god i love jet <3 which is why i apologize for making them suffer GBDJFNGKDMDKDF. uhm......jet is desert born n shit and they had a fairly large family......quite a few siblings and loving parents that are......no more.....they dont like to talk about it but kobras gotten them to open up a few times and. it's not pretty. jet lived w dr d for a bit.......show pony is like their sibling at this point they have so many inside jokes and jet taught them spanish so theyll whisper and giggle to each other and it's so annoying......they call dr d dad too so true he cries they love each other :-( but yeah jet is so wild like listen. jet is a chaotic mom friend. yall alwaysmake it weird istg but like. jet is very caring and kind bc they had so many siblings so they kind of revert back to that a lil w the others n the girl but also theyre just like. slightly unhinged. they were raided with show fucking pony what did you expect.......jet just disappears n theyre all like !??!?!?!?!!? n then a few minutes later jet calls them like guys. did you know that i can outrun that jackal pack by tommys. theyre so much slower than ithought. and theyre like okay......um........and then they come home with random shit like why do you have the steering wheel of a 1978 car. where did you get that. why. i love them :-) they care for others and spend a lot of time bandaging others up and stuff but also they r kind of......wild.....they have lots of weird stuff abt them and a lot of scars. probably the most out of the four? idk how that all works but i say it can shut up it's my fictional universe and i get to say what happens. also they do the girls hair :-) me n kyrs r big biggg fans of this.......they have similar hair texture and they call the girl all these cute little nicknames in spanish and carry her around all they all like the girl is just Carried around all the time......she is small and holdable what can i sya.......

oh and ghoulll yeassss this bitch........ghoul is also desertborn but hes been on his own for a while.......kobra n party were found pretty early on by show pony n co. but ghoul wasnt found until they were abttttt.........15 or so? and God they were absolutely feral still is but he Bit. so much. he hissed and everything. he just sat in the corner glaring at everyone it took quite a bit of time to actually get him to open up......and he was so paranoid theyd throw him out if he fucked up.....he knocks something off dr d's desk and they find him hiding and crying somewhere and they all hug him and tell him its okay and hes like What.......its more of a subconscious fear now he trusts the others w his life n stuff but like...deep down yknow....anyway he still bites it's mostly to piss off kobra their relationship is.....fun. ghoul brings home wild animals and growls if he wants and kobra is like Die. kobra lives to piss off ghoul oh my god every chance he gets he takes a jab at him pls....ghouls like look at this tiny little bitch i found while holding up a mouse and kobra is like thats what we said when we found you and ghouls like BITCH. DIE. HATE YOU. but they are best friends <3

n um.....last one the GIRLLLLL HELLOOOOOOO.....shes what really solidifies the team tbh like they were starting to really bond and work together she really clicked them all in place they lover her so much oh my god......they all try to give her the childhood they could never have and it's their worst fear soemthing will happen to her or them and they wont be around for her anymore esp party they lie awake thinking about what would happen......and ghoul always tells him theyre all doing the best they can for her and shes clearly happy but still they're so scared.......dr d tells them theyre proud of how theyve raised her and they cry omg......and ALSO. another epic kyrslee hc is that the girl is actually closest w kobra. he takes her out on the motorcycle all the time [he makes her wear the helmet dw] nd shes the only one allowed to call him silly nicknames like kitty or whatever......ghoul tries it and kobra maims him <3 kobra is like here ill kiss ur scrape better and ghouls like wheres my kiss tf.....and kobra covers the girls ears and is like whores dont get kisses. and ghoul is so mad......partys like ill kiss u :] and ghouls like No. Ur Goddam Brother Better Give Me My Fucing Smooch. but yea the girl is their babie they LOVE HER........jet teaches her [and ghoul] to read and it's very sweet and party let's her paint and draw on the walls and compliments her and sticks her drawings up everywhere......they renovated the pantry to be her little room but soemtimes she sleeps in one of their rooms yknow she loves them.....n they lvoe her i cry........

um.......i might stop here this is so long and if i start on the romance n shit this will get unbearable but yes 💖

[happikattwuzheere]

ok i was gonna try and actually draw out noah’s first time meeting gansey in this au but then i realized idk how to do that without like actually scripting/drawing out basically a whole actual comic complete w/ background and everything and like, i might do that someday but not today so we’re just gonna do this in text BUT 

more deer boy au, this time feat: Its My AU And I Want Noah To Get To Be Happy And Safe So He’s A Fey This Time 

SO. out somewhere in a forest in eastern europe/western russia possibly, the nearby people know that the forest is ruled by a powerful entity that they call Czerny. he’s a leshy--the old man of the woods, a king within their own lands, mischevious and capricious with travelers, but Czerny in particular is known to despise humans. Most leshy just mess with them, trapping them in their forests to wander in pranks that are harmful but in a very fey-dont-know-how-fragile-people-are way and which can be subverted by turning your clothes inside out which is frankly very fun but ANYWAY. Czerny will do that too but he’s also just in general far more likely to be unkind to humans who pass through. people aren’t sure why, it’s suspected some personal grudges may be in play; he’s a very old entity with a long memory.

there’s one sort of exception to this, though--leshy are known to guide children cursed by their parents to a group of people called the forest people, but czerny in particular is known to take a very direct interest in the lives of the castaways; he’s more or less outright adopted some before and at the very least checks in. any kids who choose to leave and rejoin civilization are warned that, while the forest will always be kind to them, they will never see him again if they do so. 

anyway so the point of all this is to say that barrington “certified asshole” whelk manages to get his hands on czerny’s true name, which is unfortunately still written down somewhere despite his best efforts to wipe all those out, this is why he hates humans, but the point is, whelk manages to trap and imprison czerny and drag him back to england with him, use his power for some nefarious purposes for a while, czerny is DEEPLY unhappy. 

meanwhile ronan and gansey are just setting out on the road to head toward the village most of the story takes place at, and they run into All This Nonsense, and gansey catches on to Whelk having forcibly bent some powerful magic entity to his will and, being gansey, is like, well that’s not nice at all let me just set you free

and the moment he does all the candles in the room snuff out and the air gets very heavy and ronans like “gansey that may have been very stupid” 

czerny won’t even physically manifest at first. he is VERY grumpy and absolutely planning on screwing the person who freed him over. he doesnt like owing ANYONE a life debt, but that’s what this is now, and he’s had a VERY bad time being forced to work for whelk, let’s get this over with

so his booming terrible voice echoes through the room all “state your request, what favor would you ask?” 

and ganseys like oh gee i wouldnt dream of asking anything of you, i just felt bad with you trapped in there 

and czerny pauses. and goes. “you. you know im a fey right”  gansey: the possibility had occurred, yes? oh wait shoot thats a thing with fey, isnt it, uh. cant we. cant we call this one a gift? 

czerny: 

czerny: ok i will give you some credit here i haven’t laughed that hard in ages 

gansey: i didn’t....hear anything?? 

the conversation basically continues like that and czerny slowly realizes that this guy really is seriously trying to get out of being owed a life debt, which has czerny utterly flabbergasted and very quickly revising his opinion on the guy. at the very least he’s fascinated and curious enough that hes like. well now i have to see what happens. so he ends up agreeing to travel with them, since, no, the life debt is non negotiable--he does, however, leave out the bit where he doesn’t actually have to stick around, he could very easily just go home and gansey could come and call on him whenever he DOES think of a favor for czerny to pay him back in kind--gives them the name “noah” when they ask what to call him, because, hey, that guy with the boat and the animals was pretty cool, it works, and disguises himself as a boy about ronan and gansey’s age 

but there’s a bit of a joke in his disguise; a dual-layer glamor, basically--the primary glamor is making him look like, you know, human sized, instead of a giant man with moss for a beard and huge horns like gnarled branches and so on and so on, but he gives himself pointed ears as a private joke and places an additional, very minor glamor over those so that it’s not that people don’t see them so much as people don’t notice. basically whitelists gansey though so that minor glamor doesn’t work on him. 

he does not, however, whitelist ronan.

ronan notices the pointed ears anyway, because he’s a cambion, not that gansey knows that yet, and nor does noah. 

ronan does point them out and say “hey those might be a problem” and noah, now immediately VERY suspicious, goes, “oh sure i’ll put a glamor on them” but doesn’t actually change anything about his setup, and, upon figuring out that ronan hasn’t told gansey what he is/that gansey seems to be under the impression that ronan’s human, decides, “well ok now it’s a game” 

so noah’s playing a game of “we’ll see who gives the game away on what we REALLY are first” with ronan that ronan doesn’t know about at all

ronan, as a result of this exchange, assumes noah must be a really weak fey to have made that kind of rookie mistake. like, a brownie or something. noah’s happy to leave it that way indefinitely but noah’s p terrifyingly powerful and kept in check only by the force of fairy law and also his desire to continue using the life debt as an excuse to hang out in england as long as he wants and watch this very interesting human and the also extremely interesting people he seems to be able to keep finding while slowly revising his very old very set in opinions on humanity as a whole 

bonus pic for reading all that which was gonna be part of me drawing out the scene before i realized that wasnt gonna work: 

[captainshyguy]

not to be a little melancholic but i've been thinking a bit about all the people that have come and gone in my general social circle like. not just irl, but online too. the close friends, who eventually left, and the ones on the outskirts, but were always there. at least, for a time. the people you never quite talked to, but were in your bubble, in your life, if just for a bit. the people who will only be icon, words on a screen to me. the people who will forever be 14 in my memories, because its all i have of them 

its just...its weird yknow? not even getting into social circles from school, friends you grew apart from, friends of friends of friends in your class that you had an odd connection with

but online its like. i’ve been in a few online communities in my time. the penguins of madagscar community on fanpop, one for the same fandom on deviantart, the agents of shield one here, then the maze runner, then star wars, then mario, then star wars again...i’d say ‘and hollow knight now’ but lets be honest, i haven’t made....many friends or even mutuals through it solely X]

i guess my point is like. all of these communities were different people. and over time, whilst i’ve generally stayed put (until i was physically the last one left, and jumped ship, like fanpop) people just. they left yknow? maybe it took a couple of months, maybe a couple of years, but they did, and its such an almost...odd thing to experience

im not saying people cant leave, not at all but it just made me think how many people i’ve known, how many i’ve been friends with, how many existed in my orbit. how many i only have pieces of. and i guess...how many people’s orbits i was in. the person i was in the past lives on through each and every one of then, and i have no idea what stuck. what’s their ‘luke’ memory, their takeway. heck, some of them wouldn't even have it by that name. 

one thing im glad about in a way is like. from each of the communities that like. meant something to me, i managed to grab a few people almost. a few that also dug their heels in, a few that are still in my orbit, however close or far, but they’re there. they’re posting actively or somewhat actively and i know where to find them. and thats nice 

it just makes me wonder sometimes yknow?? how many people currently in my circle, currently in my orbit, will eventually leave one day? who will stop posting, who’s icon i simply will never see again.

i do hope, with all my heart, that all the ones that i fell out of touch with are doing well 

(im musing about specific people under the read more, WILL get long kjdfhnd) 

from my primary/secondary school i dont have anyone exactly. the closest i have is one guy i was pretty fond of but not like. romantically. i follow his youtube and whilst i dont really watch the videos seeing his face pop up every now and again is nice. but man i do think back on those secondary school friends. funnily enough by the end whilst i liked my “official” best friends i honestly ended up more fond of others. sarah, priya, shriya, zarah, zi yu, kyle. danny, introducing me to treasure planet, hiding away with him and his friends to watch films in forgotten rooms when it was near the end of the year, then liam, of course, man..its weird he was my best friend in the first few years when i moved there, then we got put in different classes so we just didnt see eahc other much. but that fondness was always, always there. god, and jake....i wonder if he thinks back fondly to the two of us pretending to be transformers. i wonder if im still jazz to him. god, and then sophia, just, not even hanging out but having our little ‘hot buttered toast’ song. i hope thats the memory she has of me. (i haven’t even listed everyone from this part, and i couldnt! it was a 7-8 year period of my life! right during my brain developmental stages!!)

its weird i was in love with ryan for nearly three years. a lot of those memories are soured knowing one of my friends spread it around school and everyone secretly knew, (and looking back i was way out of his league like, morally lol) but still. maybe once or twice a year i’ll dream about him, and for a brief moment, im there, sitting with him in geography as he shows me magic tricks, during that period i do genuinely think he liked me too (before it wore off for him lol) and im still in love. 

from college, man....ewan was like. i have a feeling he was leading me on since he had a girlfriend lmao, and was just flirting for fun bc he saw i was shy and was trying to get me to react, but it never felt like bullying yknow? i dont think he was actively trying to make fun of me. so i dont know, it was nice, it felt nice and it still kinda does. 

khairun.....im so glad i still have her. i’m still a little gay for her. i remember sitting with her on the bus, riding for hours as we were on the geology trip, and she would ramble about the game of thrones video game and she’d squint so happily and her eyes would sparkle. she talks about dark souls now and i only see her messages, but i can still feel her enthusiasm. or tanisha and fatima, my other geology friends, my maze runner friends. seeing the scorch trials with fatima in the cinema. joking about newt and thomas with tanisha. sitting around the table with my actual friend group, in the big lounge chair reading the tolkien dictonary, joking about the flash with bindiya. sleeping around maddie’s house and playing would you rather. 

heck, i didnt even touch on teachers!!! teachers i connected with so much on a genuine level!!! mrs chambers, mr hauge, mr wrght, miss lloyd, mr hutchinson, miss petra, mrs young! mrs mohammed, mr santa maria, mr longdon, miss langley, mrs maize, miss davies. i know with teachers, the kids must start to blur together at a point. but i just....i hope, at least. with those first two, they’ll remember me, just a bit. i keep having dreams where im in my old school, and i try to find them., i’ve found mr hague a few times. but until about a month ago, whenever i got to geography, miss chambers was never there. im glad i finally found her. 

then fanpop...lexii, having the same birthday as me, talking with kait and roleyplaying as penguin ocs in high stakes situations. dating dylan fkjdngjdh, rigging the club’s presidential election. its weird, i dont have a lot of memories from this time. just....just people? people posting their ocs, people drawing ech others ocs. kaitlyn, anya, kait, dylan, lexii, imaneasel, mya, peacebaby, madascargirl, kate, starslight, imogen, tressa, sammi, crystal, cc, syliva, jasmine, hikari, amber,  yellow, steff, lilly, blue, richard, monique, sharpey, hannah, icicle, ratking, cian i- god, there was so many of us. theres more, i can think of more names. there was so many

anya did what i did pretty much and went to deviantart then kinda dug her heels in and didnt leave, though i don think she’s more active on toyhouse. and yet, i still see her art there, so its nice. having her throughout the years has been nice, watching as both of our art improves. she’s always been a bit ahead of me. then cian i’ve been talknig with pretty much every day for about 6 months now, thats been nice 

and then here, man! the agents of shield fandom! man! i dont remember a lot of names honestly besides the ones who stayed, and sam. i hope sam’s okay. y’all who stayed, who are still mutuals, the hm....five of us i think? though the one ofy’all i was closest to isnt around as often X[ but still. im happy y’all are here 

some of y’all that have been around long enoguh will know i was best friends with kacie for a while. from....i think that was my brief stint in the dan and phil fandom. she. well. she’s okay, the last i heard of her. but my overtalking screwed that up i think. my last message from her, a few years later, was amicable at least. i still feel awful about that if i think on it too hard

i think i only picked up ronan from the maze runner, at least, that i talk to, yeah, right, there’s two others that are still about but i dont think we’ve ever held a convo X] 

and u current peeps! from mario, star wars and.....im not quite sure where for some of you! i love u all! especially y’all that have been around forever, just, liking each others posts every now and again., i dont know how many people you all follow, but i follow less than a 100. i might only be a blip on your radar, but i like seeing y’all, genuinely. thank you for being in my orbit. i hope i’m a comforting or at least. nice reliable presence in yours, for as long as we all stick around.  

[lesbianwords]

Novel Prep Tag Game

@cherry-ink​​ tagged me to do this! thank you so much!! i don’t usually talk about my wips on here but im trying to be braver about it so here we go :’)

im tagging @clypso​​ , @writeningrod​​ & @romanwrites​​ if you feel like doing this!! (also anyone else who happens to see this and wants to do it :D)

FIRST LOOK

1.) Describe your novel in 1-2 sentences.

Crow gets into a small town university she has wanted to go to ever since she was a child and discovers that none of her fellow students are completely human. The new life Crow has been thrown into features a side of her she never knew, strange friends with unique abilities, and a mysterious girl who barely shows up to class and is clearly up to something.

2.) How long do you plan your novel to be?

Don’t know gkjshgksdfjg

3.) What’s your novel’s aesthetic?

writing messages in your friend’s notebook, tired laughter at two in the morning, eerie silence, knowing looks, weary sighs, the feeling of being truly seen for the first time, reaching for something but not knowing what it is, feeling too much at once, wondering what you have gotten yourself into, friends with secrets

4.) What other stories have inspired your novel?

i can’t think of a specific one tbh!

5.) 3 images that get the feel of my novel:

link

link

link

MAIN CHARACTERS

6.) Who is your main character?

Crow, 19, clumsy and chaotic nonbinary lesbian werewolf

7.) Who is their closest ally?

Roman (still dont know if his name is roman or ronan tbh), who becomes her roommate & best friend

8.) Who is their enemy?

idk abt a Serious Enemy yet but she does have a rival lmao their name is Chax and they’re a cat person.......literally

9.) What do they want more than anything?

at the start it’s to belong somewhere

10.) Why can’t they have it?

she doesn’t rly have friends at home and her mom isn’t the greatest. she doesn’t know how to make friends and the big city is too intimidating

11.) What do they wrongly believe about themselves?

Crow sees herself as a Horrible Monster who can’t maintain/isn’t meant for close relationships but she’s actually a good friend once she gives it a go

12.) Draw your protagonist!

........no. HGLKJSFDHG but heres a picrew

picrew link

PLOT POINTS

13.) What is the worst thing that could happen to your protag?

getting to feel a sense of belonging and then having it taken away. also being forced to eat asparagus 

14.) What secret will be revealed that changes the course of the story?

the secret that the Mysterious Girl who talks to Crow in class and disappears for long periods of time has.

15.) Do you know how it ends?

hmmmm not really

16.) What is the theme?

found family, self-discovery?, friendship, healing....still gotta figure it out but these are some of them 

17.) What is a recurring symbol?

don’t know yet!

18.) Where is the story set?

in a fictional town (that’s yet to be named), don’t even know where and tbh don’t rly think it’s important bc the town is like a magical little world of its own 

19.) Do you have images and scenes in mind already?

i have some, mostly for the beginning

20.) What excited you about this story?

the characters and their abilities!

21.) What is your usual writing method?

planning characters for months on end, writing like 2 chapters and then never writing again LMAO so a very flawed method as you can see, i’m trying to get better and not give up this time!