#but webber? why webber? like nothing that was going on needed explaining

[arolesbianism]

I feel so bad for Webber he could've had one of the better of the rework animations if it weren't for that stupid voice over. Like I have a lot of issues with it even without the voice over but remove that and suddenly it goes from one of my most hated of the rework animations to one that I actually quite like but just have some issues with

[purrlockswatson]

Susan Kay's Phantom, WHY?

Lord save me from Erik and Christine's child. I'll never recover from all the times the existence of that child hurt me - not in a good way.

The last 80 pages really turned the grasshopper for me. Kay built a beautiful opera house, then sent a flaming, gunpowder-loaded chandelier through the roof. I enjoyed the first three-quarters of the book. It took incredible storytelling and research to build up that sprawling history only hinted at in the closing of original novel, and I love how the story made a spectacular Frankenstein Phantom from many adaptations.

But then came Christine.

Kay's afterword makes it worse for me. She states she doubts that A) Raoul would doubt Christine's love for him, and B) whether pity is a strong enough motivation for Christine to go back to Erik in spite of her fear. Ergo: Raoul was right when he suspected Christine loves Erik.

Well, I can clear up both of those points - A) Raoul is an insecure, jealous boy; B) aside from pitying Erik, Christine thought she could pacify him by going back, making pity AND fear her motivations, which she explains in Apollo's Lyre.

But Phantom's loyalty to the original is beside the point. What disturbed me about this explanation is that Kay meant it to be a love story. But there is no love.

I have already harped on to two friends about Phantom of the Opera and sexuality (thanks to @blackforrestpunk and @blackghostm2o for putting up with me). I think I can write an essay on the subject. After all, vampire fiction is my area of expertise.

⚠️Warning: Heavier subjects discussed below. I don't usually post content like this, so I thought i should give a heads up.⚠️

Leroux's Erik was never sexually attracted to Christine. All his fantasies he concerning her were purely romantic, even domestic ('a wife to keep amused on weekdays and take out on Sundays') whereas in Webber's adaptation, seduction is a recurrent theme in the Phantom's songs. There is nothing wrong with adding this extra layer to Chrsitine and Erik's relationship, as long as it doesn't overshadow their artistic bind through music.

But in Kay's Phantom, towards the ending, Erik's music becomes purely a sexual euphemism. It's a hypnotic drug that he uses to control Christine, and of course, there is that scene where he describes himself assaulting her by playing Don Juan Triumphant.

That is deeply misguided. Erik's music was his one connection to the purest, truest part of humanity. He was treated like a monster and often lives like one, yet he could express and evoke feelings that no most people could never, through his song.

And there is the child.

Erik thinks that Christine looks exactly like his mother. He speaks of her as his daughter. He is, self admittedly, old enough to be her father. And they still have a son together. There is no context, no possible way, that this is romantic. Horrible things can happen in a book. But it needs to be clear that it is horrible. Not so with this abominable ending. It was written as a romance, the bittersweet parting of starcrossed lovers. If Kay set out to write a love story for Erik and Christine, she did not do it: there is no evidence whatsoever in the text I read that Christine and Erik love one another. Erik lusts after her; Christine is drawn to his dark broody mystery. That is not love; it's Twilight.

I will reread this book for the sake of the brilliant child Erik, who I see myself in, and for Nadir and my feline lady Ayesha, but I will never be reading past Erik's delightful meetings with his old friend. As far as I'm concerned, he lived in his damp cellar in peace, with a large salary, to the end of his days.

More rants, I mean, very dignified and reasonable reviews of POTO adaptations here.

[malereadermaniac]

The Experiment ~ Mark Sloan x Male Reader

An old memory comes back to 'haunt' Dr Sloan word count: 1k m!reader (no genitalia mentioned) / FDNI

He didn't expect to ever see you again

But there you were... Walking into Seattle Grace and talking to Chief Webber

"Mark! Are you even listening to me?" Derek snaps his fingers at his friend, but that didn't break Mark's stare

He watched you attentively as you walked towards him and Derek with the Chief; head empty-no thoughts, except that at the same time, many different thoughts ran through Mark's brain!

"Shepherd, Sloan, this is Dr (L/n). Make sure you get on his good side as he is now our new ENT Attending" The chief introduces you

"Derek Shepherd" the handsome man says, shaking your hand and giving you a smile

"(Y/n) (L/n), pleasure to meet you~" you say, smiling with a warm tone in your voice

A silence fell as Mark failed to introduce himself, still just looking at you

"Sloan!" The chief says, nudging the attractive male out of his trance

"This is Mar-" Derek starts but you cut him off quickly

"Mark Sloan, I know~ We went to med school together" you say with a chuckle and gesture to Richard that you two should go finish up paper work

However, you make sure to give a small wink to Mark as you walk past

And that man's eyes couldn't come off of you as you walked away! Even if he tired to rip em offa ya!

"What? Cat got your tongue, Mark? How come you never told me about (Y/n)?"

"Cause I barely knew him. I have a surgery to get to." The muscular man says and leaves his friend in the hallway

The truth was that not only were you and Sloan in Med school together, but you two also experimented together

For a while as well...

And no matter how good it was for the both of you, Mark didn't like to admit that he liked it - or at least he didn't back then

Nowadays, Sloan's a little more comfortable in his sexuality - when Callie came out he tried to comfort her by saying "Hey! I kinda like guys too??", which thoroughly shocked the orthopedic surgeon

But back in med school? Mark had a reputation to hold up! He couldn't afford to lose it, no matter how much his heart would race every time you smiled at him or how many mornings in a row he would wake up early just to watch you sleep beside him with nothing but his covers over you to hide your beautiful, naked body

"Dr Sloan! Perfect timing, I was just introducing Dr (L/n) to your patient" Yang explained as Sloan's resident on the case, which you had now joined

"Dr (L/n)?" Sloan questioned

"Yes Dr Sloan, you are reconstructing this young woman's ears, so I will be needed for this surgery" you say with a smile and return to the patient

During the whole explanation to the patient, Mark looked at you and thousands of thoughts rushed through his head

Why are you here?

How have you been?

Does he still have feelings for you?

Was that the reason he stopped hooking up with you?

Why does he have a boner?

Oh no he has a boner.

And so on, so forth

"Dr Sloan, a quick word please?" You ask

The two of you walk out into the hall as Christina answers any questions the patient has

"Listen, I know I'm incredibly attractive and you want to profess your undying love to me, Mark - however we are both at work, so please keep your eyes off of my face and ass. Could you do that for me?" You ask in a tone which sounded as if you were gentle-parenting the plastic surgeon, giggling at the man's slow nod

"Sure, but we need to talk later" Sloan mumbles

"Talk? About what? I remember you were the one that stormed out of my apartment half naked shouting "I'm not a homo"?" You say with a cold face, a small raise of your eyebrow and squint of your eye emphasising your point and leaving the plastic surgeon slightly speechless

At lunch, you were the most popular attending, like a steak thrown to hungry lions, everyone wanted to get to know you, befriend you or bed you

"So why become an ENT?" Arizona asks

"More importantly, are you single?" Another attending asks

"Leave the man alone... where did you study?" Asks Bailey

Sloan was left standing with an apple in his hand as the table was crowded with attendings and residents, especially ones with interests in your specialty

"Oh! Mark!" Dr Torez calls the man-slag over, making the smile on your face fade for a second

"Excuse me, I just need to go check on a patient" you say, getting up from the table and walking off

But Sloan followed you...

Next thing you know, you're in a supply closet with your ex hook-up/fuck buddy/boyfriend/whatever

"What the hell, Mark??" You kinda shout, your hand rubbing your head as you had knocked it into a shelf

"Just give me 5 minuets to explain myself, (Y/n)! Please" Mark begs, his tall figure looming above you as his chest presses against yours

"Fine, but that's all you get" you say with a pissed off look

And so he started

Explaining how he was ashamed of himself

How he didn't really want to break things off

How he was wholly in the wrong

And how he still has feeling for you all these years later...

By the end of it, the tall man had a tear in his eye and a thin blush on his face; you felt pretty bad for him, and guilty for being a bitch to him earlier

"Mark... I'm sorry for being such a dick" you say, hugging him, your head resting against his huge chest; a feeling so vaguely familiar

"No, I'm sorry (Y/n)"

"Turn a new leaf?" You say with that warm smile which Mark had fallen for back in college

"Sure, sweetcheeks" Mark responds with the nickname he used to call you

There won't be a part 2 sorry guys but I had to cheap out of Disney+ so Grey's anatomy is NOT on my mind

[lcnleyisthemuse]

Ruin the friendship | Jake Webber

Pairing: bsf!jake Webber x virgin!reader

Warnings: talk of virginity, Jake wants to fuck you, reader is lowkey paranoid, no smut (yet), kissing, uh that's about it I think lmk if I missed anything

Word count: 1.7k

Here you were, another party, drink in hand and loud music blasting in your ears. But that was just a normal Saturday being best friends with Jake Webber. "Truth or drink, bitches!" Tara yelled out, and that was your que to join. You walked over, sitting around the coffee table with Tara, Jake, Johnnie, Carrington and random other people. The questions rolled around, the usual questions drunk people asked, like what's your favorite position, what was your first kiss like, blah blah blah.

"Y/n, what was losing your virginity like?" Someone asked, and there it was. A question you couldn't answer because there was simply no answer. You hadn't lost your virginity, maybe if you drank then people would take it as it was a bad experience. But you knew jake would ask about it. You may have been best friends but he didn't know your sex life, or lack there of. You giggled awkwardly, taking a drink. "Oh, that bad?" Tara asked and once again, you gave a shrug and an awkward giggle. "I need a cigarette, Jake?" You said, holding your hand out expecting him to just hand you a cigarette but instead he stood up. "Let's go," he said.

You mentally prepared yourself for the questions as you followed Jake outside. Once outside, he pulled out a pack of cigarettes, taking one before holding it out for you, you took one. "Go ahead, ask your questions," you sighed as he lit his cigarette then lit your cigarette for you. "Who said I had questions?" He chuckled. "Oh come on, you wouldn't come out here with me if you didn't have questions," you giggled. "Fine, I just wanna know why it was so bad? Like was it the guy? Did he cum really fast because I've heard that happen to multiple girls," he said, looking over at you. "No, uh.. it's actually- I've never had sex, not yet at least. But I'm not about to tell a crowd of people that." You giggled, looking down.

"You're joking," He said, chuckling in disbelief. "Nope," you said, popping the 'p' in the word. He laughed, literally laughed. "Jake, cut it out," you said, pouting slightly. "No- I'm sorry- I'm sorry! I just can't believe it! You're just so hot! I don't get why anyone wouldn't want to fuck you," he said. Your cheeks heated up, he must be really drunk to say something like that. "It's not- I mean I've never been in that serious of a relationship and I'm not just gonna fuck someone random." You explained and he laughed again. "Jake, shut up!" You groaned, rolling your eyes. "I'm not laughing at you! I just can't believe it. I mean, have you seen yourself? You're smoking hot, I would gladly fuck you," he said, making you choke on the smoke of your cigarette and cough. "Okay, you're extremely drunk," you said.

"Drunk? Yes. Extremely? No. I'm very aware of what I'm saying. I would fuck you if you'd let me but I will not because I don't want to ruin our friendship. I really care about you and I don't want to ruin the friendship." He said, going back to smoking his cigarette like nothing had happened. You were in shock, too stunned to speak. "Did I ruin the friendship?" He asked after a moment of silence. "What? No! I'm just- I'm surprised, I just never thought- you're you and I'm me.. we would never- I don't know," you shook your head.

"What do you mean by 'you're you and I'm me'? You don't think we could work?" He asked, looking down at you, genuinely curious. "I just- I'm- I'm weird I mean you've said it yourself." You said. "We're both weird." Jake said. "I-I- we're just different. You're a big partier, you're loud and that's not bad but I'm just- I go to parties because you ask me to. I would never go on my own." you admitted. "Why didn't you tell me that? You know I'd be happy to just stay home and hang out with you." Jake frowned. "But I feel like I'd just ruin your night if we did that. We're just different.. almost opposite." You sighed. "Opposites attract, don't they?" He asked. You blushed slightly, smiling a little. "I guess you're right." You said softly. "I'm always right." He chuckled. "Oh shut up." You laughed.

"But- would you ever- like would you ever want to try and make it work?" He asked. "What? Like- like be together?" You asked. Jake nodded, "Will you regret asking me this in the morning when you're hungover?" You asked. "Absolutely not." He said quickly. "Then yeah.. I mean- yeah I would wanna try it." You said, smiling up at him. Jake smiled, putting his arm around your shoulders and pulling you close. "Good, because I would've died if you said no." He chuckled. "Good thing I said yes," you giggled.

The rest of the party went smoothly, talking, drinking, not so casually leaning against Jake whenever you could. People could see something was different between you two but no one called you out on it, except Tara and Johnnie who caught on very quickly which made you giggle. Of course those would be the two to notice. "I should get home," you said as the party cleared out and you rubbed your tired eyes. "Now hear me out, what if you stayed?" Jake asked. Your face heated up, your mind immediately going to him saying he wanted to have sex with you. You weren't ready for that, you were sure he wouldn't do that but the possibility still crept into your mind. "Oh, I- uh-" you didn't know what to say. "You can say no. I just- Tara already left and I don't feel comfortable with you taking an Uber alone." He admitted. "Oh!" You said, immediately feeling bad that you ever thought Jake would want you to do something you weren't ready for. "Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm just protective but you know that." He chuckled softly, feeling awkward.

"Yeah, I'm sorry. I just- I thought- I don't know what I thought," you said, shaking your head. "Oh- oh shit were you- did you think I was asking you to stay so we could have sex? We just started dating, I don't move that fast." He chuckled. You nodded, "Yeah, I know. I just- I'm paranoid." You sighed. "Oh I know that." He chuckled. "If you want, I'll sleep on the couch." He said. "We've slept in the same bed before." You giggled. "I know but- but it's like different now. We're dating. I just wasn't sure if you were comfortable with that." He said, you nodded in understanding. "I get it but I'm okay with it. Plus now we can cuddle, I'm little spoon." You said, giggling as you skipped to his room. Jake laughed, shaking his head as he followed you.

You sat on his bed as Jake grabbed you a pair of clothes to sleep in. He tossed you a shirt and pajama pants. "Thank you." You smiled, going to his bathroom to change. You changed, coming back out afterwards. Jake was wearing pajama pants but no shirt. He was looking for a shirt. He wasn't wrong about things being different. You knew he was hot and you always had a little crush on him but now, looking at his back as he was shirtless? He was so fucking attractive, it was crazy. You could see the muscles on his back as he searched through the drawer, you were ogling and you didn't care. Jake muttered something you couldn't hear before he put on a shirt. You pouted slightly but quickly moved on. You sat your clothes on the dresser. "You're back," Jake said as he turned around. "Yes, I am." You smiled.

You got into bed, crawling under the covers. You got comfortable as Jake got into bed as well, laying next to you. There was an awkward silence that fell over the two of you. You didn't know why, things were rarely awkward between the two of you. "So.." he said softly. "I really want to kiss you." You admitted, staring forward and refusing to look at him as your cheeks reddened. Jake looked over at you, "I want that too." He said softly. "I've only ever kissed two people," you admitted. "That's okay," he said, reaching over and grabbing your hand.

You had seen the sweet side of Jake a few times, but never this close. Never when the sweetness and softness was pointed towards you in such an intimate way. "And I've never made out with someone." You added. "That's okay, you know, I'm not going to rush you into anything you don't want to do." He said. Finally, you looked over at him. "I know, I just- I don't want you to think I know more than I actually do. I don't want you to think I'm bad, ya know?" You sighed. "You're not bad, no one's bad, just inexperienced. It's okay." He said, letting go of your hand to gently place it on your cheek. "Do you still want to kiss?" He asked and you nodded quickly. "So badly," you said. "Okay," he smiled. He leaned in slowly, his lips soft against yours. The cool metal of his piercings hit your lips, it was different but you enjoyed it. He was soft and sweet and tender and it made your stomach erupt in butterflies and sent shivers down your spine, you wondered if Jake felt the same way.

He pulled away slowly, stroking your cheek with his thumb. "You're definitely not bad," he chuckled softly. "Yeah?" You asked, gently and blushing heavily. "Oh yeah, I can't wait to kiss you again." He said, smiling. "I mean... I'm not complaining if you do." You said. "Good," he said before leaning in again and kissing you just as gently as before. You scooted closer to him, letting him deepen the kiss ever so slightly. He placed both hands on your cheeks now, holding you close as you both kissed, his lips moving slightly against yours and you followed his lead. He pulled away slowly, leaning his forehead against yours, leaving you breathless and with your heart racing. "I really will never get tired of kissing you." He said, making you smile. "Same here." You agreed. "But, I say we stop here and go to sleep, yeah?" He said and you nodded in return. Both of you pulled away from each other, laying down in the bed and getting into a comfortable position, you laid your head on his chest as he placed an arm around you. You both soon fell asleep.

[tahitiwoke]

I've forgiven, I've moved on.

phil misses the first half of the conversation - the first half of the entire meeting, really - except it's claire and chris and march and when he comes in, they all turn and stare. he'd been in the gym with ed, so his usual suit and tie has been traded for shorts - cheerfully described by his assistant as booty shorts, which they're obviously not, they've just got the exact right thigh to cloth ratio required for freedom of movement - and a boston celtics jersey. it seems to take all three off guard. there's a pause before march say anyway and gives him the download as to why chris had texted him emergency meeting. and phil is, obviously, late. because he was across town, getting his ass kicked. claire looks less than pleased when he shows up.

as of two hours ago, webber - some old school but relatively harmless senator out of iowa - has given out some pretty scathing comments during a vote on intelligence community allowances and blah, blah, blah. the bottom line: he's refusing to retract and nothing anybody seems to be able to say or do or offer has been enough. and of course when being polite doesn't do the job and when claire can't be seen to be strongarming this particularly touchy piece of legislation, naturally they turn to someone willing to be impolite.

phil calls the guys wife. ignores the look chris gives him when he says that he knows nancy, explains that she's c.i.a., that they overlapped at langley for a brief time.

he has no clue where she is these days, but he's got a good guess based on the information chris rustled up; he dials a familiar number and sticks it on speaker. joey's pizza. "seven-nine-seven-one..." he looks at his watch, reads the time. 13:22:07...13:22:08...13:22:09... "...thirteen-twenty-two-...eleven." connecting. chris's eyebrows are in his hairline. switchboard. " langley, nancy webber. " one moment. phil shrugs when claire raises an eyebrow at him and doesn't get a chance to say anything else before nancy's voice comes through the phone, a little tinny and little like she's having to shout over helicopter downwash.

phil coulson, kicking it old school. " you know me, nance, if it ain't broke don't fix it. " you're wasted in an office, you know. " yeah, but it's a very nice office. " i bet. being bossed around by a beautiful woman, sounds like your fuckin' dream job. let me know if you get bored by it any time soon, though, i've got a great spot open in kirkuk. " wouldn't you just love to give me orders -- look, nance, this isn't a social call. " yeah, no shit. the white house chief of staff calling me two and half hours after my husband called your boss a punk on national television? i'm not stupid. " she's your boss too. " technicalities. " but an important one. he needs to issue a retraction, we can't have this kind of shit spewing out of our own party. " sounds like a you problem to me. " and if you don't want me to make it a you problem, then i suggest you convince todd to publicly apologise. " i'm really not going to do that. we both know what these restrictions will do to the intelligence community, it'll handicap people like you and me. " well, maybe people like you and me deserve to be a little handicapped sometimes. " jesus. she really knew what she was doing when she hired you, didn't she? i've always wondered what it was that got you to jump ship. what could she possibly be giving you to make turning your back on your people worth it? " my people? what am i, moses talking to the pharaoh? " maybe she's not giving you anything, maybe she's takin-- " be very careful, nancy, and choose your next words wisely. todd is going to retract the comments within the next thirty minutes, and if he doesn't, then tonight when you and him and your kids come home, i'm going to be in your house. and if he still refuses, i'm going to leave. then, when your kids are asleep -- i'm going to come back. "

there is a long, audible pause. in the background he can hear the downwash ease up as the aircraft lifts off; there are people shouting out instructors. nancy breathes over it all. after a solid wait, they all hear consider it done. " good. it was nice catching up, nance. " fuck you, phil. and that's it.

there is another long pause -- march looking at claire who looks to chris who's been staring at phil like he's just implied he's going to murder some kids. which, c'mon, let's not all be so dramatic. threats are threats and promises are promises. it's only a few seconds this time before there's action; chris nods and says something about a press briefing, claire shakes march's hand and he goes off, satisfied that the problem has been dealt with. and claire looks over at him, still sweating on her couch.

" sorry i was late - ed was beating me to a pulp. " she laughs at him and waves a hand, dismissive and pleased, i've forgiven, i've moved on.

[vro0m]

vro0m’s rewatch - 121/304

2013 Belgian GP

Alright. Post summer break. Oooh bad weather. Well it's Spa, no surprise.

Okay quali report. It was dramatic. Q1 started wet with everyone on inters. Then it dried up and some people tried the slicks towards the end. And it worked! Backmarkers such as Chilton, Bianchi and Van der Garde made it into Q2. Q2 was pretty uneventful but it started raining again in Q3 so everybody had to go back to the pits for wets. Di Resta was already on inters so he had a free track and set a good time, it even looked like he could get the pole as the rain came down harder after that. But right at the end, it eased off enough for Rosberg to beat his time. Webber, Seb and Lewis were still on track though, each one beating the last one's time. Lewis was the last to cross the line, and he snatched the pole, again! On the images, you see his team absolutely fucking losing it out of sheer surprise. "I can't believe it!" he said on the radio. 

So that gives us as top 10 Lewis, Seb, Webber, Rosberg, Di Resta, then Jenson, Grosjean, Raikkonen, Alonso and Massa. 

It's Lewis’ 4th consecutive pole. He says this one was even more surprising than the last one, given the changing weather. He explains his lap in detail again, showing how tricky the conditions were, even pinpointing the parts of the track where you see it going from wet to dry or vice-versa. The tyres were not doing good again and he had a lot of understeer. (It's not really reassuring for the race performance.) He says he was trying to look where he was on the TV screens in the pit straight, and then he saw his team cheering so he thought it must have been good.

I finally caught the name of the skysports presenter and it's Simon Lazenby and he's talking with Anthony Davidson about Lewis feeling more and more at home in the car and in the team. They're highlighting again that it takes time for that to happen as we saw when Schumacher made his return. (And as I talked about in a long-ass rant about driver-car fit in a precedent review, I think it was 2012 Abu Dhabi GP quali). 

Oh. My. God. Platine blond Seb. Hello. Hello, platine blond Seb.

We get a Lewis interview. He says he's been training 6 days a week during the break. He's back with a lot of energy. He says it's nice to separate yourself completely, he didn't go on the Internet at all, didn't read what was said about the sport.

He thinks it's positive to keep his mind fresh, step away for a little bit and then come back. Simon asks if he feels that the British fans are rooting for him given how good of a season it's been for British sport. He says it's incredible, he's from Stevenage and who would have thought he'd be doing what he's doing now. Who would have thought he'd have the support that he has. He feels he has such an important role and he's very grateful for it.

Last year was the big crash at the start caused by Grosjean.

He says it's not a good weekend to remember and also it was a tough time for him as he'd just lost his auntie which was really difficult. But this year's completely different. No one's asking him what team he's going to, he's happy where he is, he's just won. There's nothing to worry about, he can just focus on winning.

He didn't think he'd come here with such a good car, he says it's funny, incredible how things happen. He feels like all things happen for a reason. "There's a reason that I felt the need to move, there's a reason that I decided to come this way and there's a reason why the car is good this year."

Simon asks if he truly believes he can win the championship that year. He feels like he has the support, and that he's ready, he's been waiting and training and he feels like he's in the best place. He just hopes the fans know that he's flat out, 100% and he appreciates all the support and he's here to do it for them. 

There's a Greenpeace protest happening at the track. There are paragliders above the track and some people have "landed" (quote, I don't know how they landed there, if it was paragliding too or something else) on the grandstand's roof. Apparently they're about to deploy a banner but they can't get to the track from where they are so the start probably won't be delayed. Ted says the organisers and F1 have said it's now a problem for the police, which has been "quite slow" to respond. 

Formation lap 

And they're racing! 

Lewis gets a good start, several people lock up in the midfield but everybody manages to get out of turn 1 safe and on track. Seb overtakes Lewis rapidly. Webber got a bad start. It seems Redbull has found straight line pace though. Rosberg is under pressure from Jenson, who's under pressure from Alonso. After a couple of laps, when the DRS is enabled, Lewis is already way too far to benefit from it, almost 3 seconds behind Seb. Redbull is telling him to look after his tyres though. Massa says his KERS is not working. Alonso overtakes Jenson. Webber overtakes Jenson. 

Lap 10. Seb is 4.2 seconds ahead. Alonso is 3 seconds behind Lewis but closing on him, then Rosberg and Webber are fighting over 4th place. Lewis pits on lap 12. That's early. He's out in P9. Lewis overtakes Grosjean for P8. Rosberg pits, out in P9. Grosjean overtakes Lewis. They're fighting… Alonso pits. Webber pits. Alonso is behind Lewis. Lewis overtakes Grosjean. Seb pits. Alonso overtakes Lewis. And Seb overtakes Jenson for the lead. 

Lap 20. It's not a fascinating race so far tbh. Seb still in the lead, Alonso 7 seconds behind, Lewis 2.2 seconds behind, Rosberg 5.2 seconds behind, Webber 1.5 seconds behind. Webber is edging closer to Rosberg. Lewis is dropping back and is saying his tyres are not doing well. But it's too early to pit. Raikkonen just went off in a corner trying to overtake Massa and pits immediately to retire. He had been having brake issues from the start. Lewis pits for the second time. Massa pits. And Di Resta and Maldonado collide. Maldonado manages to pit, Di Resta DNF. Alonso pits. 

Lap 30 already. Seb still leading, now ahead of Alonso, Jenson in P3, Lewis P4, Rosberg P5 but of course still some pit stops coming. Seb pits. He's still in the lead. Jenson pits, Lewis is back on the podium. 10 laps to go. Maldonado gets a 10 seconds stop and go penalty for the collision. 

And that's the end of the race. 

Seb, Alonso, Lewis. That wasn't interesting at all.

Sewis full strength in the cool down room, though.

Lewis tells Seb how Alonso could keep up with his pace even when he had DRS. 

It's Lewis 44th podium, which is level with Niki Lauda. Apparently Niki's last podium happened 28 years before this, to the day.

Seb and Lewis are too busy chatting to listen to DC.

People are booing??? Loudly? Seb? What is happening. Now they are cheering?! Seb is as confused as I am he says so to DC. DC says they're not gonna highlight why that is exactly at the moment but I guess it has to do with the protest then. HAHAHA while DC is talking to Alonso, Seb and Lewis conspire and they come up behind him and dump the rest of their champagne on his head. Absolute children.

The crowd loves it lol. As soon as he gets to Lewis, Lewis says "it wasn't me" with the biggest stupidest grin on his face. He says it's a privilege to be compared to someone as legendary as Niki, glad to see so many great fans. He says he's not too optimistic for Monza seeing everybody's pace there in Belgium but he thinks they'll be better in Singapore. 

This is extremely chaotic btw I can't really translate the atmosphere into words but the microphones go on and off, there's feedback, the crowd is very loud and reacting to other stuff than what is said, and yelling stuff at the protesters...

We don't hear more from Lewis this time. 

[sevenkittensinatrenchcoat]

Cast Interviews From 1986 vs. 2016

So, I’ve found a podcast that’s been interviewing various Cats cast members and superfans. Most of the interviews come from the cast of the Broadway Revival, but there are also several interviews from US Tour III which went from 1986 to 1988. So we’ve got a bit of both old and new. Here’s what I’ve learned about how things have changed over the years and why the Broadway Revival is such a confused mess:

In the interviews of US Tour III cast members, it seemed like everyone was told the story of the play and had a pretty clear idea of what was going on. Some actors were given backstories for their characters, but the amount of detail varied. Actors cast as Munkustrap and Tugger were told that their characters were brothers and the sons of Old Deuteronomy. Actors cast as Demeter were given a full backstory for the character. However, Grizabella’s story remained vague. Bombalurina, Mistoffelees, and Sillabub also had no confirmed backstories, and most of their characters were improvised during rehearsals. Also, since this tour was from 1986-1988, a lot of cast members don’t remember a lot of what they were told. It’s been a while.

Out of the backstory and character information provided, Demeter’s was the most consistent. She was kidnapped by Macavity, escaping shortly before the events of the play. She’s an outsider to the tribe, but she knows Bombalurina and stays close to her. Bombalurina also had some experience with Macavity, but she enjoyed it more than Demeter did. This lines up with what Jacob Brent said about Demeter in the 1998 version.

Some character dynamics are different from more modern versions. Alonzo is Demeter’s love interest, as was typical with Broadway-based productions. Also, in most productions, Alonzo doesn’t get along with Tugger, but he’s a fan of him in this version.

Outside of Alonzo, it was made perfectly clear that Mistoffelees was played as a full adult, the same age as Munkustrap. The actor who played him throughout the tour, Randy Slovacek seemed to have made up most of Misto’s characterization in that production by himself. Misto was friends with Grizabella in the past and wasn’t upset by whatever she did to upset the others. When she first appears, Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, taking the place of Coricopat and Tantomile, who were cut for the tour, run up to her and try to chase her away. Misto calls them off, but Munkustrap won’t let him do anything else to help her and he respects his authority too much to try anything.

The interviews of the Broadway Revival cast tell a very different story of what was going on behind the scenes. Apparently, they were rushed for time and there weren’t as many rehearsals before the show as there usually are. That, combined with the new choreography meant that nobody really knew what they were doing. Munkustrap and Tugger were confirmed to be siblings, but very little backstory information was given outside of that. The few cast members who worked with Gillian Lynne seemed to have a better idea of what was going on with their characters. Andy Blankenbuehler was still figuring things out and wasn’t able to offer similar clarity. The few times anyone was told anything, it was usually by Trevor Nunn.

Basically, Nunn and Lynne invented Cats, and nobody else seems to know how the fuck any of it works.

Tyler Hanes and Sara Jean Ford knew each other before being cast and they came up with a lot of backstory for their characters, which everyone else got drawn into. Ford played Jellylorum as the same age as Tugger. Since the actors are best friends, so are the characters, even though that makes little sense with their personalities. Jennyanydots, Bombalurina, Demeter, and Grizabella were in that same age range as well. It appears that nobody was anywhere between Munkustrap and Old Deuteronomy in age, for some reason. Jenny and Skimble are a couple in this version, so Skimble’s probably also in this group. They have kittens together. Electra and Rumpleteazer are among them, though nothing was said about Mungojerrie. The merge with Coricopat and Tantomile in the US Tour implies that they’re twins in that version. In the Broadway Revival and the tour based on it, they’re apparently unrelated.

Grizabella ended up with a far more detailed backstory, all made up by the cast. She’s Jellylorum’s sister and she stole a man away from her and Jelly never loved again. None of the kittens are Jelly’s, though she’s sort of the nanny to all of them. Griz also had some sort of affair with Tugger and broke his heart, which is why he doesn’t do commitment. Then, Griz ran off with Macavity, got dumped for Bombalurina, and then she got dumped for Demeter who decided that Macavity was bad news pretty early on and ditched him. The relationship was abusive, but no one mentioned a kidnapping. After leaving Macavity, Griz was no longer welcome in the tribe, even though Bomba and Demeter were because Reasons. Forgetting that these characters are not human, she then got addicted to drugs, was driven to prostitution to support her drug habit, had a bunch of kids, and then left those kids to be raised by Jenny, who resents her for it. Nobody says which kittens are Grizabella’s. Portions of this backstory were used in the 2019 movie.

Also, I can say that some of the characterization issues with Tugger were, in fact, a direct result of the choreography changes. Tyler Hanes wanted to play up the sexuality of the character in a way that the new choreography didn’t allow. If Gillian Lynne’s choreography had been used for the number, Tugger’s characterization probably would’ve turned out very different, but the changes meant that what Hanes knew about the character, and how the audience perceived the character, were altered by the new choreography putting emphasis on vanity instead of sexuality.

So, that’s the story so far. Compared to at least one early production, the Broadway Revival was rushed and poorly thought out. The actors were given little information and left to fend for themselves, and they prioritized their bonds with their irl friends over what made sense for their characters. Interviews of cast members from both the revival and the following tour reference Andy Blankenbuehler as the one who had all the information, who the cast looked to for instructions. But, he had no idea what he was doing and couldn’t really help them.

Most of the problems can be traced to Blankenbuehler not knowing what he was doing and never really figuring it out. Though, some blame has to be placed on the cast who, left to their own devices, had a lot of bad ideas. Hanes and Ford in particular, though it was good that someone was trying to take charge, created a bit of a mess. None of Jellylorum’s character resembles any other Jellylorum characterization I’ve ever seen, and it doesn’t even come across clearly on stage. The young cast all seemed to struggle with the idea of playing older characters and nobody told them that they couldn’t age them down. The generation gap between Tugger and Jenny and Jelly is character information that’s now completely lost on the audience. You need older characters disapproving of Tugger to show that he’s a controversial figure to the tribe, not just an annoyance to Munkustrap.

But, some of the worst characterization problems were not entirely the fault of the cast. As I mentioned before, Tugger’s characterization was changed by the choreography. Grizabella had already been aged down by her redesign. Since Demeter’s kidnapping backstory wasn’t explained, this affected how Demeter was portrayed. Her sympathy for Grizabella came from having been on that side of town as Macavity’s prisoner and seeing the condition she was in. Without that backstory, Kim Faure may have not known that Demeter was supposed to have sympathy for Grizabella and interpreted her part differently. This was the result of unclear direction.

What We’ve Learned Today:

1. In the 1980s, Mistoffelees was, in fact, played as older than Jacob Brent played him in the VHS.

2. Munkustrap and Tugger (and not Mistoffelees) have pretty much always been the sons of Old Deuteronomy.

3. The backstory Jacob Brent gave for Demeter was the standard backstory for the character well before the VHS was filmed.

4. Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer were considered twins in the 1980s and most likely continued to be seen as such until the revival era, though I haven’t exactly checked in with every single production.

5. The Broadway Revival was a behind the scenes and nightmare and it’s mostly Blankenbuehler’s fault.

6. Gillian Lynne wrote Cats. Andrew Lloyd Webber wrote a concept album.

7. There are no middle-aged cats in the 2016 revival. I think Sara Jean Ford started it.

8. The idea that Grizabella’s backstory involved Macavity started with the 2016 cast improvising.

9. Kim Faure’s Demeter was most likely OOC due to a removal or lack of explanation of backstory.

10. Sometimes it’s okay to do things the same way they’ve been done before.

[herewegobacktomoon]

Meant to be

Hi everyone. As I've read a lot of theories lately about what will happen when the show is bakc in March, and they all include Carina being in danger, I needed to take my mind off it.

That's why I've decided to write this one shot where Andy is moving back with Robert,so she needs to pack her stuff up, and they decided to throw a party, only between girls.

Anyway, it's mainly about Maya and Carina. I hope you'll enjoy it, let me know what you think!

It was 6 am. and Maya and Andy had just gone for their run while the Italian was still in bed, sleeping like a baby.

It was Maya's free day and she was looking forward to spending it with Carina, who was also home from work, and it was for that reason she and Andy had decided to anticipate their morning workout.

“I'm moving back with Robert, I took a day to pack all my stuff so that in two days I'll be back home.” Andy suddenly said, catching Maya off guard.

“Oh wow, it was reaaaally fast. Wasn't it supposed to last 90 days? You guys have a strange perception of time” Maya chuckled, raising her eyebrow.

“ Oh, I didn't remember you this funny” Andy teased, “Yes, at first it was 90 days, but Robert talked about it with his new sponsor, Dr. Webber, and he said him that if our relationship doesn't somehow push him to use again, there is no reason why we should stay apart.” Andy continued.

“Well, just be careful not to move his attention on some other kind of dependence now... abstinence can play tricks!” Maya said smirking, avoiding Andy's hand which was ready to slap the back of her head “No, really, apart from jokes, I'm very happy for you that you two can be together again."

“Maya, don't try to put it nicely, I know you're happy to get rid of me so that you and Carina can spend time together alone. I know you.” Andy replied with a smile, showing off her confidence.

“Italian magic” Andy teased again, fastening her pace to challenge Maya.

“Yeah, it could be” Maya said, not even trying to hide the wide grin on her face “but I also do care about my best friend's happiness, and I know you love Robert. That's it.<br />

Wow, I can't even recognize myself, where did these words come from?” the blonde added, shaking her head in disapproval.

Obviously she accepted the challenge, running twice faster than Andy, shouting back at her “Yeah, probably you're right, but I can't give you the satisfaction of knowing it” and as the blonde was going further, Andy couldn't make out the words she was saying but deep down she knew, from Maya's face, that it was intentional, she wasn't meant to understand.

“Catch up with what?” Andy claimed raising her eyebrow in disbelief “We're training for a marathon and you didn't tell me?”

As soon as she reached her, short of breath, she asked “What was that? You didn't want to admit I was right and so you tried to kill me?”

Maya grinned “Well, we had slowed down too much, we needed to catch up.”

“You? A marathon? Well, it has the same chances of me being straight, and I said it all.” she said chuckling, taking her keys from her pocket.

“Yes, I definitely didn't remember you being this funny, and above all this nice!” she replied ironically.

Both of them still laughing, they stepped inside, trying not to make too much noise as they didn't know if Carina was already up: Maya couldn't say it out loud, but earlier she had fastened her pace to get home in time, hoping that her girlfriend wasn't already up, just to be there with her when she would have opened her eyes.

It was true, Andy was right: Carina made her better version come to the surface.

She knew it and actually she didn't regret it at all, she just didn't want that side of her to be there for everyone. 

Everything was as they had left it, no smell of coffee and no sign of French toast: Carina was definitely still in bed.

After all, it was only 7.30 am. and it was her free-day so it was pretty reasonable.

Andy went to the bathroom, while Maya headed to her bedroom, to check on Carina.

When she entered, she found her girlfriend lying on her lap, facing the door, sleepy but awake: “Hey, morning Bella!” she said, smiling “ How was the run?” 

“Morning babe” she replied, sitting next to her and placing a soft kiss on her forehead, “I'm sorry I left this early, I just wanted to be back in time to have breakfast together. Anyway, it was good, a bit cold but I still need a shower.” 

Carina rolled over, now lying on her back, stretching her sleepy body, keeping her eyes on the blonde “You don't have to be sorry, I've just waken up, anyway. You're perfectly in time” she said, gently rubbing her thumb on Maya's hand.

“Ok then, I'm gonna shower and you can start preparing breakfast if you want, or just wait, if you need some more minutes of sleep. I'll be done in a minute” she said, kissing her girlfriend again before getting up and heading to the bathroom.

Carina nodded with a smirk on her face: the blonde hadn't noticed it, but she had already something in mind.

Maya, before entering the bathroom, seeing Andy sitting on the couch, said “ I'm taking a shower, Carina is still in bed. If you need something just knock at my door, but KNOCK. Ok? Try not to wake her up”

Andy nodded, with a serious face “Yes cap, I promise I won't mistreat your Italian princess!”

“Fuck off Herrera, fuck off:” she said, with a wide smile.

“What? I was just returning the teasing from earlier.  Anyway, you're welcome!” she smirked, shrugging.

Maya finally stepped inside the bathroom, shaking her head thinking about Andy's jokes, and she turned on the tap,  waiting for hot water to arrive. Just a few seconds later, the water already running over her body, she heard the noise of the door opening. 

“Andy I know I've told you to be quiet, but I've also told you...” she couldn't finish her sentence that she felt a warm pressure on her bare skin.

“Can I join you?” Carina said softly, pressing a gentle kiss on her girlfriend shoulder.

“It would be an honor for me” Maya answered, turning towards the Italian to kiss her.

The shower was getting hotter than expected and they barely noticed that the water was actually turning cold: making out was an excellent way to keep warm, but it was a matter of fact that the water was now cold and that's why they somehow got interrupted.

All of a sudden, Andy arrived, knocked at the door but entered without waiting for an answer.

“Maya, I'm sorry if the water is cold, I was washing some stuff so that I can pack it later. I came here to look for my slippers.”  she said in all tranquility, not paying attention to what was happening in there.

“Andy, wh- what are you doing? I told you to knock, to KNOCK. Preferably before entering. Do you remember the good old days? Shower time is private time. New year, same old habits. Nothing's changed” she shouted from behind the shower curtain, trying to remain calm, with Carina  wrapping her arms around her naked body, looking a bit confused.

“Got it, got it. My bad. Anyway, try not to have a heart attack. I mean, I'm not seeing you naked and I didn't walk in while you're doing things with your sleeping beauty, so...” Andy chuckled, before looking up at Maya and turning completely red.

“Oh God, why don't I keep my mouth shut. Okay, I'm leaving, nothing of this has ever happened. See you” Andy said, stuttering in her words, closing her eyes and trying not to make a fool of herself, not being able to hold back a smile.

Maya and Carina both giggled, the blonde pressing her forehead on Carina's shoulder.

“So...am I your sleeping beauty now?” Carina teased.

“hmm...let me think about it” Maya said, closing her eyes and kissing her girlfriend.

“What do you have to think about?” Carina replied, sounding quite offended, but still smiling.

“Whether you were actually sleeping or if it was just a way to disguise your intentions” she teased back with a smirk.

“Mmm... I think you already know the answer to that” she added, gently pulling the blonde closer.

“ You may be right” Maya grinned, with not only the water being really hot again.

After 20 minutes, they were all in the kitchen, preparing breakfast together.

Maya and Carina seemed to have already forgotten about it, but Andy was still a bit embarrassed.

“Ok, I'm sorry girls. I didn't mean to interrupt you..oh God this is awkward. At least, it was my first and surely last time to screw the pooch. I'm done”. She stated, letting out a sigh of relief.

Still laughing a bit, Carina said “Why “surely” the last”? Are you not gonna enter the bathroom anymore?”.

“I'm moving back with Robert. Didn't your girlfriend tell you about it? She seemed very happy at the news” she said, wincing a little.

“Well... you know... we were having some other kind of conversation.” Maya replied, biting a biscuit while looking at her girlfriend, causing Andy to blush and Carina to smile.

“ I'm so happy for you! But Maya had told me it would have lasted much longer. Did something happen?” she asked with a genuine concern.

“No, actually Robert just talked to his sponsor and he said him there was no reason why we should be separated.” Andy explained.

“Dr. Webber right? He's one of the best at his job, you can trust him, if he said so, that's because it's true. Anyway, you can't leave without a proper party! What about tonight? We can call Vic too, just a girl thing.” Carina said enthusiastically.

“See? This is what being nice and caring means” Andy stated looking at Maya, who rolled her eyes.

“It's okay for me, I like parties!” she continued.

“And you?” Carina asked, taking Maya's hand in her own and bringing it to her lips to place a soft kiss on it, “What do you think?”

“I think it's a great idea, but be prepared for everything: when Andy and Vic are together, no one knows what they're up to.” she answered, giving a bad look at her friend, and then turning to kiss Carina.

“Don't listen to her, she's only trying to scare you.” she replied, pulling on angel face that Maya hated, because she knew it meant troubles.

“Ok, perfect! I'll prepare something to eat then, so meanwhile Maya can help you pack some stuff if you need! I've just texted Vic, and she has said she will be here by 7.30 pm, at the end of her shift.” Carina said, opening the fridge to come up with some ideas.

“Thank you, Carina, you're too kind. Anyway, if you need to buy something, just tell me. I'm going to have lunch with Robert, so I can buy some food on my way back!” Andy added.

“You're welcome! Okay, I'll look for some cool ideas and then I'll make a list if I need anything." she replied, scrolling through some food blogs she was submitted to.

Maya and Andy moved to the couch where some boxes were filled up with clothes and needed to be closed.

“You're very lucky, Maya. She's sooo nice.” Andy whispered to her friend.

“I know, she's amazing. I don't know what I did to deserve her.” Maya whispered back, looking at Carina, who was making some pizza dough, with loving eyes.

“I don't know either, but now that you've been so lucky, try to make the best of it, don't be pessimistic. You're way too happy when she's around. It's cute.”  Andy said smiling, elbowing the blonde.

“Oh shut up, you know you're right, so don't try to make me blush with no reason”. Maya grumbled, trying to hold back her happiness.

It was true, when Carina was around she felt different, she was different: she felt vulnerable and human, and it was something she liked, but she was still figuring that part of herself out and she was a little embarrassed whenever other people would have noticed it.

“Yeah, yeah I know I'm right, I mean...I'm always right”. Andy claimed, jokingly full of herself. 

It was already 1pm and Andy left to go to have lunch with her husband: she had to buy only some drinks, so she would have probably been back at dinner time, spending the afternoon with Robert as she had already finished packing up.

 “So... what's on the menu for tonight?” Maya asked smiling, wrapping her arms around Carina's waist and placing her chin on her girlfriend's shoulder.

“Well, I'm making pizza, some Italian snacks, which we call crostini, and I've also thought of baking a little cake, nothing too difficult”. She answered, trying to keep still at the blonde's warm pressure, but turning to kiss her on her cheek. “Try this” she added, handing Maya one of her crostini.

“Ok, this is sooo good. You're taking it seriously, aren't you?” Maya continued, closing her eyes at the incredible flavor she was just tasting.

“Of course I am, there's no party without good food.” she stated as if it was obvious, making Maya  grin again.

“You know I love you, right?” the blonde claimed, pulling the Italian closer.

“Mmm, yeah, you've said it every now and then, but I think I might forget it if you don't say it more often.” Carina teased, lowering to kiss her girlfriend.

“Oh well, I don't think it's possible to forget it... Anyway, I'll say it everyday if you want me to, even though I'm more willing to demonstrate it.” Maya teased back, cupping Carina's face with her hands, leaving a deep kiss on her lips.

“That sounds pretty good. May I know how?” she said smiling against Maya's lips.

“Of course, just come with me” the blonde replied proudly, heading to their bedroom.

The afternoon went by quite quickly, and it was already 7.00 pm: Andy and Vic should have been there in 30 minutes.

Maya and Carina had already set up the table with all the food, waiting for Andy to bring the drinks, and they started getting ready.

Maya had put on a shirt and a pair of skinny jeans, but Carina had opted for a flowery dress, as she wanted to stay comfy: the blonde couldn't help but stare at her.

“Is everything okay?” Carina asked, brushing her hair.

“Yeah, I mean, you're just gorgeous. “ Maya said, eyes widening, with a soft voice.

“Oh thank you Bella!” Carina added, moving towards her girlfriend to kiss her “You're amazing too”.

Maya was already blushing when the doorbell rang. 

“They're here. I'll go”.  She said, running to the door, to find both Andy and Vic, hands full of drinks.

 “ Hi Cap, finally party time again” Vic claimed loudly while entering “If it wasn't for that super super gorgeous Italian woman of yours, all that paperwork would have buried you”.

“Don't play me, Hughes. And yes, it was Carina's idea to invite you, so don't make me change my mind” Maya answered with a grin.

“Okay, okay. I got the message.” Vic mockingly complied.

As soon as Carina arrived in the kitchen, they all sat down at the table and started having dinner, enjoying every meal the Italian had  prepared for them.

“Carina everything was extremely good! How is it possible that Bishop is always in shape with you cooking like this? I mean...I would have gained at least 200 lbs!” Vic said, looking shocked.

“Discipline Hughes. It's all about discipline.” Maya replied proudly, looking at Carina who was still laughing.

“ Discipline” Vic repeated, mimicking Maya's voice “How do you even stand her? I mean, I would have already killed her!”she added, talking to Carina.

“She's not that bad actually.” She said, her eyes full of love, and leaning to place a kiss on Maya's cheek, causing her to blush.

“Oh God, I can't with these two” Vic stated, shaking her head, looking for Andy's approval.

“Yes, the cuteness is too much. We're not used to seeing a soft Maya.” Andy added “She's usually in a sergeant mode all day”.

They all laughed together, but Maya had already the feeling that it was just the beginning of an endless night.

“Ok girls, listen. Why don't we do that game where we can ask each other any kind of questions, and if you don't want to answer, you have to drink, but you can only skip twice?

I don't remember the name, but it's cool, I promise!” Vic asked out of the blue.

“What game are you talking about Hughes?” Maya asked back, a little concerned.

“That one we used to do when you were still Maya- monogamy is for the weak- Bishop. Andy, tell me you remember!” Vic replied immediately.

“Of course I remember, it's the game you always want to play to when you are curious about something, but you don't know how to ask about it” Andy teased, making Maya worry even more.

“Okay, you got me.”  Vic admitted, raising her hands. “It was a question for Carina..” she added shyly.

“Oh, go. Ask me whatever you want, really.” Carina said, without even the smallest sign of concern, contrarily to Maya, who was sweating.

“Ok, sooo... you know I've dated Avery for some weeks not to long ago, right?” she asked to introduce her question and Carina nodded in approval.

“Well, every time I was at the hospital there was this voice...” Vic continued, “about this orgasm study, which really caught my attention. I mean, I had never heard about anything similar before! Is it true or is it just a urban legend? Because if this is true, wow, you're a genius!!” 

Maya let out a sigh of relief and Carina chuckled “Yeah, yeah, it's true. But before I talk about it, I'd like to know about this “monogamy is for the weak” story.” she asked curiously, looking at her girlfriend and raising her eyebrow.

“Oh God” Maya whispered, hoping that Vic and Andy wouldn't have taken the opportunity to make fun of her, but it was too late, as Vic had already stood up.

“Oh okay, this is serious.” Carina grinned, placing a hand on Maya's, noticing her girlfriend's tension.

“We were drinking something, all together, we were talking about relationships stuff and then she went like -My self-care is lot of sex! Monogamy is for the weak or the very, very, dedicated.-” Vic said, trying to mimic Maya's voice and gestures. 

“Yes, to be precise Wednesdays were her self-care day and there were only hook-ups in her future plans, nothing serious. She would have laughed if you had said that she could have ended up being in an actual relationship.”  Andy added “But I think she might have changed her mind”.

Carina chuckled and turned towards Maya, who was completely red “Is it true? Have you changed your mind?” she teased, resting her hand on Maya's thigh, gently caressing it to lower her tension.

“Well, not really. I've only switched mode.” she said with a grin, still blushing from earlier.

“Oh, you bet. You're the very, very dedicated now!” Vic stated, almost euphorically.

Maya shrugged and Carina leaned to kiss her, whispering an “I love you, Bella” to her ear, so that she was the only one who could hear that.

Then, as she started telling the story about her study, she caught everyone's attention, especially Vic's.

“Well, as I was saying the story is true: the idea came up to me while I was reading a book and everything was based on the male experience, assuming that the female brain would have worked the exact same way” she said, interrupted by Vic's comment “Well, the author must have been pretty dumb. I MEAN, WHO ON EARTH thinks that men and women use brain the same way, most of men don't even use it!” she stated, almost shouting and making everyone laugh.

“Yes exactly”,Carina continued chuckling, “What I wanted to do is to use my job as a tool that could let me study the female brain and how it works when it comes to situations related with my ob/gyn knowledge. And that's why I came up with this idea. Thank to Dr. Bailey I was able to start my study and it's going pretty well!” she admitted proudly. “And I'm always looking for volunteers” she added with a smirk.

“Oh wow, that's freaking awesome! You are a real genius!” Vic claimed, trying to avoid the proposition “Did you work on other projects too at Grey Sloan?”

Andy knew from Meredith that Carina had also had a story with Arizona Robbins, which was involved in the other project Carina had taken part to, and she tried to stop Vic before it would have turned out to be pretty awkward.

But Carina had already answered: “Yes, I worked on a project with my ex, Arizona. It was about the risk of complications during a pregnancy. We did a good job too, I mean, she was very good at it!”

Andy was looking at Maya, trying to understand what was going on in her mind, as she had lowered her head, looking at her hands, playing with her fingers.

She couldn't read Maya's thoughts, she wasn't able to figure out whether she was sad, jealous or confused, but luckily, Carina was there.

She turned around to look at the blonde and took her hand, bringing Maya back to reality: her eyes now widen, staring at the Italian with a caring and lovely glance.

Andy was relieved that Vic didn't get them into trouble: she took a look at her phone and saw that it was already midnight. 

Then, she and Vic decided to leave, both of them thanking for the amazing dinner and Andy in particular being grateful for the hospitality too.

As soon as they left, Maya started clearing the table, but Carina stopped her,wrapping her arms around her waist.

“What happened earlier? You had fallen silent all of a sudden... did I say something wrong?” she asked, kissing the blonde's neck.

“No, absolutely, you've been amazing as always. I was just thinking.” she replied, keeping on cleaning the table.

“And what were you thinking about?” Carina continued, tightening her grip on Maya, not willing to let her go.

“About you and me.” Maya answered, turning over to put the dirty dishes on the counter.

“ And it made you sad?” Carina asked concernedly.

“No, of course, at least not us. It's me. I'm just afraid you're gonna stop loving me.” Maya admitted, trying to hold back the tears.

“Why would I ever do that? I love you, Bella. I love you a lot.” Carina said, now facing her girlfriend and stroking her hair.

“I don't know, you were talking about Arizona earlier. I know it's over, it's not that I'm jealous. It's just...it made me think.

A story can end in a matter of seconds, and I'm scared. I don't want to lose you.” A tear dropped from Maya's face.

“Bella, you're not gonna lose me. It's different with you, I'm different with you. You know, you're not the only “monogamy is for the weak” here. My brother used to make fun of me because I couldn't be in a relationship that went past three months. I mean, I didn't want to settle down, to create actual boundaries, until I met you” at the sound of Carina's words, Maya was caught off guard, she had never known about this and it somehow reassured her.

“I love you Bambina, and I've never said that to anyone before. You don't have to be scared.” Carina continued, kissing Maya on her forehead.

“I love you too, babe”  added Maya “and I still don't get how is it possible for me to have been this lucky meeting you at the bar that night.”

They both started giggling and Maya gently caressed the Italian's cheek, kissing her again, at first on her lips and then down to her neck.

They were both wrapped up in the warmth of each other's presence and without even talking, they were sharing the same thought: they didn't know why, how or what was that made the two of them meet at the bar that night, but they were sure about one thing.

Whatever it was, it was meant to be.

[pkducklett]

“The Friend Of My Enemy...Is My Friend” - A DST Fanzine Fanfic

Now Available on Ao3!

Fandom: Don’t Starve Description: Wurt unlearns some prejudice regarding the tribe of scale-less living in the Constant, and makes some new friends along the way.  Rating: Gen.  Characters: Wurt (Don’t Starve), Webber (Don’t Starve), Wendy (Don’t Starve), Abigail (Don’t Starve), Wickerbottom (Don’t Starve) Pairings: n/a Author’s Notes: This was my part of the Don’t Starve Together fanzine, this effort was a labor of love for the Don’t Starve community and its creators. I thoroughly enjoyed doing this piece on a character which, until recently, I had overlooked. Wurt is now probably among my favorites in the cast, and it was really through writing this that I came to love and appreciate her as a character. I hope you enjoy this piece as much as I enjoyed writing it. 

Wurt was small, but she would grow. She was young, but would age. She was different, and…

She clutched the object in her claws. A series of papyrus pages with words and illustrations on them bound together with pigskin and string. The object was her fascination, something she had never seen in her marsh village. The scale-less left the object behind when they were chased out of merm territory. 

At first she told herself she was on a mission to return it. Drop the object outside their village and sneak home; she’d never have to face them. The scale-less couldn’t be trusted. That’s what she was told since she could remember. Afterall, scale-less allied themselves with pigfolk. By trading with the pig “king”, they had placed their kind in direct opposition with mermfolk. Wurt knew this, the scale-less just destroyed when they came into the swamp. It was for this reason, she set out to have as little contact as she completed her mission. 

The object slipped in her claws and she was snapped from her daydream to catch it. The midafternoon sun above barely touched the evergreen forest floor where she was standing. She looked around to catch her bearings, all traces of swamp had been left behind hours ago. How far was the scale-less village? At least there was some semblance of a path; she could only hope it led closer to them.

Walking allows for time to let the mind wander - which is why she felt another idea pushing through her brain. Perhaps scale-less had more paged objects, and maybe she could trade to get more. If she established a trade with the scale-less, maybe more merms could as well. Then the scale-less wouldn’t need to rely on pigs ever again. Wurt could be the first merm to reach out to the scale-less and usher in a new era for mermkind. It was ambitious, but she felt the responsibility of all her young years on her shoulders. 

Shaken again from her daydreams, she heard movement come from the bushes. She stiffened, placing the object safely on the ground next to her and adopting a defensive stance. “Stay back, florp!” she was woefully aware of how defenceless she really was all alone in the forest. 

The movement stalled slightly before some… thing popped up to face Wurt. They floated above the forest floor, completely transparent and unblinking. The apparition bore no difference to the specters that occasionally wandered into merm territory - except the flower atop its left side. 

Wurt felt the green drain from her face. An angry ghost was likely to rampage and destroy anything in its path. On the other hand, a neutral ghost was like a stalker, following just close enough waiting for a chance to strike. It was an ultimate darned if you do situation. She shook her head, no she couldn’t back down now. She was going to save mermkind; she had to be brave. “You...nice?” her voice faltered, but she managed to stay standing.

The apparition blinked and twisted around to get a closer look, brushing their ghostly tail against her side. Shivers rose from the spot and she had to push herself to keep standing. “Hey! Stop that.”

They stopped, surprised and cocked a ghostly head in confusion. 

“You understand me?”

A nod.

“You know where scale-less is, glort?”

They cocked their head again. Looking Wurt up and down before focusing on the object at her feet. She noticed and rushed to grab the object tightly against her chest. 

“No, this not yours!” She growled “This belongs to scale-less. Me going to return it myself!”

Once again the ghost looked confused. They maintained eye contact with Wurt for a brief moment before turning back toward the bush. 

“What is it, Abigail?” a voice called before pushing out from the bush. A scale-less girl brushed leaves from her shirt. She was pale with round expressionless eyes and long yellow hair tied in symmetrical pigtails. The flower pinned on the right side of her head matched the spector’s. She regarded the ghost briefly before turning attention to Wurt. “Oh. A merm.”

Wurt could feel her heart pounding against the object and tried to readjust her posture to appear confident once again. She opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted by-

“-Wendy! Don’t run too far ahead!” from the bushes came another figure, covered in a thin layer of fur and eight blinking eyes. They were a spiderfolk but apparently someone forgot to tell them that they had to walk on eight legs, not two. Like the first scale-less, they almost immediately noticed Wurt, who was beginning to think meeting scale-less was a bad idea.

“Oh you’re a merm!” They spoke in an excitable manner and waved one of their spider arms in greeting. “Are you friendly? My name’s Webber, and this is Wendy,” they pointed to the other scale-less “and this is Abigail” they pointed to the ghost. 

“What are you doing away from your swamp?” the other scale-less, Wendy, questioned.

“Wendy!” Webber reprimanded. “Be nice, she could be lost.”

“Am...not lost flurt.” Wurt’s voice shook more than she cared to admit. She breathed, here goes nothing. “Me looking for scale-less village. Wanted to know-” she paused and held out the object for the scale-less to see. “-Wanted to know if they had more of these.”

Wendy and Webber shared a look before Webber broke into a big, fangy, grin. “Oh that’s one of Miss Wickerbottom’s books.”

“Book?”

“She writes them herself.” they further explained. 

“How did you find it?” Wendy asked.

“Was in swamp. Scale-less left it when village chased them away.”

Wendy and Webber exchanged a glance and Wurt’s heart dropped. Had she said something to provoke them? If so, it was all too clear who would win this fight. Merms fight best in groups, and Wurt was far from home.

Webber was the first to make a move, pulling Wurt’s arm further into the evergreens. “Come with us.” Their voice sounded almost too cheery if killing her was the objective. 

Despite the growing feeling of dread, Wurt obediently followed at the spider kid’s insistence. Wendy took a spot behind, with the ghost following alongside. Wurt kept pace between the scale-less, but kept her eyes elsewhere. At the first sign of trouble, she had to try and escape. They had her boxed in. The path wound further into the forest, bushes and underbrush lined the sides of the path.

“So,” Webber’s excitable voice broke the silence that had hushed over the group. “I don’t think we actually caught your name. What is it?” The spider was walking backwards now to face Wurt. 

Wurt looked away, keeping her gaze off their multiple eyes. Her nerves were fraying by the second, and with it her bravery ebbed away. She wasn’t sure if she was visibly shaking, though she felt like she might be. 

“Hey, are you okay?” Webber lowered his voice. 

“Fear is an unnecessary reaction.” Wendy’s tone was flat.

Wurt continued to stay silent. The piney forest floor was soon ending into a grassy path. The world was cast in an orange glow as dark was soon approaching. Away from the trees, Wurt felt less claustrophobic, but not completely safe. 

“Hey,” Webber pulled Wurt’s arm, the concerned look on their face was top acting. “Are you okay?”

Wurt didn’t respond, she couldn’t. Her chest was tight and it locked up her voice. She was positive she was visibly shaking now, and close to tears. 

“Children, is that you?” a separate voice called. “Get back to camp before it gets dark!”

The voice provided just enough distraction that Wurt took no time sprinting away from her kidnappers. She charged back into the evergreens. Her thoughts raced as she desperately tried to remember the way back to the swamp. Dusk was giving way to night and the forest floor looked darker than ever. The shadows expanded and through her petrified mind Wurt remembered what the elders had said about going out at night. She remembered the stories of a shadowy night lady that had scared her so much she still occasionally had nightmares. Looking up, she could see the last of the sun’s light wane into the night sky. 

Now she could feel something; she was no longer alone. Tears blurred her vision, she continued running; her swamp was still so far away. She heard whispers from the shadows, and now she felt something grab her. It pulled her foot, and Wurt collapsed onto the pine needles, the book sliding into the bushes. She whipped around and caught the creature’s eyes. Pale white against the blackest black. The eyes illuminated some of its face. Sharp teeth aligned into a malicious grin opened and Wurt could feel the creature’s claws against her stomach. She let out a shriek; the creature’s mouth opened wider and its claws dug harder. She closed her eyes; she didn’t want to die.

Then the creature’s weight was gone. Its claws lifted from her belly and she could no longer see its evil smile. There was light, a torch. 

“That’s her Miss Wickerbottom!” Webber’s loud voice proclaimed. 

Wurt could see the two scale-less that held her captive earlier had come back with a third, older woman. Her gray hair was tied tightly in a bun on top of her head. She had sharp features, wrinkled some with age and dark beady eyes. The torch in her grasp was extended towards Wurt and she was intently watching her. “Oh dear.” She breathed.

“Stay back.” Wurt warned hoarsely. The older woman had bent down to her level. Webber and Wendy following suit. Every muscle in her small body ached and her throat felt like she had been eating spikes, yet she still tried to look somewhat threatening. “Keep away from… me, florp.” It hurt to speak.

“I’m just going to make a fire, dear.” the woman responded calmly. She set down the torch in her hand and pushed the kids away with the other. She worked quickly and soon the forest was illuminated by a small campfire. 

Wurt pushed herself to sit up. The spots where the creature's claws dug into stung. She tried to not look at it. Instead she kept her eyes on the three scale-less (and one ghost) who were keeping their eyes on her. The suspense was eating at her, no one was saying anything to her, just watching.

“What you...waiting for?” she hissed. “Scale-less want to hurt, just do it, glorp.” 

“We don’t want to-” Webber started but was shushed by the elder scale-less. 

“You are a long away from home, little one.” she said softly.

Wurt fought back more tears. Her muscles tensed. She was cornered, hurt, and not in any shape to fight back. 

The older scale-less moved a little closer. “What brought you out of the swamp?” 

“She found one of your books.” Wendy said flatly.

A smile. “Did you now? I wonder which one it was.” She continued moving closer to Wurt. 

“No...no closer.” Wurt struggled to get the words out. 

She complied. “Are you scared, little merm? I promise we aren’t going to hurt you.”

Wurt stayed silent, still very aware of her trembling. She curled in on herself and shut her eyes. It would be useless trying to run now, she was once again outnumbered, except this time she wasn’t even sure she could stand on her own. Something brushed up on her toes, and she flinched. Looking down, she saw there was another book at her feet. It looked similar to the first book, bound in pigskin, but the print etched into the cover made different shapes. She hesitated, but slowly picked it up flipping through the papyrus pages and revealed several pictures of little birds. A small smile crept up her face.

“I had a feeling you might like that one.” The elder scale-less was smiling with satisfaction.

She blinked. “Me called Wurt.” she said softly; her voice still hurt.

“And it is a pleasure to meet you, Wurt.” She moved a bit closer to Wurt. “You can call me Wickerbottom.”

“Wick...Wicker-lady?” Wurt struggled on the syllables. “That a...funny name, florp.” 

A smile. “I suppose it is.” She situated herself next to the merm child. “Now, are you quite alright Wurt? That was quite a scare you gave us.” 

Wurt blinked confused. “Me...scared you?”

“You ran into the forest by yourself.” Wendy interjected. 

“We were afraid you were going to be eaten by Charlie!” Webber cried. 

“Alone in the woods at night is no place for a little one like yourself. Especially without a light.” Wickerbottom spoke with a calm, concerned voice. 

“So, you really not going to hurt me?” Wurt asked.

“Goodness no.” She spoke as though the mere suggestion were outlandish. 

“But...scale-less and merms?” Her thoughts spun. 

Wickerbottom placed a hand on Wurt’s knee. “I know we’ve had our differences, but we really are here to help you Wurt.”

She trembled, tears pooling in her eyes and she flung herself onto the elder scale-less. Wickerbottom pulled her into a hug and she didn’t even fight; just sobbed harder into her chest. Then she felt someone else embrace her. Soft fuzzy arms held tight grasp on the merm child. Then another embrace joined the pile. Wurt opened her eyes, all three scale-less (and one ghost) were clinging tightly to her comfortingly. 

She smiled and let herself sink back into the hug. It felt right. She was Wurt, she was going to bring about peace between mermkind and the scale-less village. Though the beginnings were rocky, she felt assured that she had the ability to make the friend of her enemy… her friend too.

[tornrose24]

Thoughts on Cinema Sins ‘Everything wrong with Phantom of the Opera’ video.

Well at least ONE of the movies I was hoping Cinema Sins would cover happened. Some sins were expected, but I wasn’t expecting that the CS guy apparently saw the musical and has some knowledge about the history of PotO in general.

-”Several people died.” No not really unless not everyone got out of the burning opera house.

-Knew he’d make a Minions joke the second ‘illumination’ was mentioned.

-Aww, no sins off for the use of the Overture music? And its from the 80’s so of course it would sound the way it does.

-Ok, I admit showing the seats losing their dust and becoming brand new again as a ‘what if’ for movie theaters when quarantine was over was amusing.

-There’s a difference between good opera singing and annoying opera singing, which is why the ladies didn’t care for Carlotta’s singing.

-I wonder what a Silence of the Lambs opera would be like, speaking of CS getting his Hannibals mixed up.

-Raoul and Christine are supposed to be around the same age, so the fact that Patrick Wilson was like 13 years older than Emmy does make the ‘childhood sweethearts’ thing strange.

-Oh great, now CS made 2004!Raoul and Christine’s age gap as problematic as with her and Erik’s by pointing that out.

-Minnie Driver is a great Carlotta AND was a memorable part of this film.

-Oh Christ, 200,000 francs equals almost a million bucks in today’s world? Isn’t that a little too much to demand, Erik?

-Yeah Emmy doesn’t exactly HAVE the right voice for Christine when you compare her to other stage Christines (but at least she doesn’t have a weird vibrato like a certain someone).

-Christine doesn’t strike me as a super social person, and her father was a supporter of her musical talents so it makes sense that she wouldn’t be amongst her new fans and pay a visit to the chapel.

-I wonder if Ramin (aka one of the best Phantoms) found out that he was compared to Harry Styles in this video.

-Christine was supposed to keep her lessons a secret, so it makes sense that she’d confide in Meg after that.

-CS points out the unfortunate implications of Christine being a child when she was approached by Erik in this adaptation and I’m pretty sure CS is going to utterly destroy Webber for this someday.

-Actually yeah-where the hell did everyone go when there was so many people outside Christine’s dressing room a few moments ago?

-I do appreciate CS calling out Giry for just letting the Phantom stalk Christine and not stopping it sooner. (And it does feel strange that she’d let the girl she considers a surrogate daughter go through this).

-”Psychedelically laced smoke.” Every fan thinks that too.

-Also, the mirror is a trick mirror. Kind of obvious later.

-Also he needed her to think he was a divine tutor and didn’t show up until Raoul came into the picture (and because he wanted to move on to actually facing her like a real person).

-Well the horse WAS in the book, but him being part of Christine’s ‘possible hallucination’ makes sense too. Also the idea of her ridding the Phantom is amusing.

-No that WASN’T the sewers they were going through–the opera house literally had an underground lake and there’s a history behind it since the opera house this story is based on is real. 

-Erik building the statues makes more sense to me since the guy is meant to be hyper talented.Also note that this is where you can especially tell CS had experience with die hard fans of the book since he refers to the Phantom by his actual name for this sin in addition to saying WHAT they told him specifically.

-Actually CS has a good point about how the final note of the title song is shown off. They should draw more attention to Christine singing that note since its not only a display of her talent but a show of just how much influence/power Erik has over that. Instead we don’t see Emmy singing (and as anyone will tell you, she sang it as an E flat and not an actual E note).

-Yeah that scarf mask is weird.

-The smoke eye has been a mystery for AGES CS and no one can answer why.

-Love the description of singing “Music of the night” as to treat it like going to a glorious destination.

-Thanks for reminding me why the casting choices and changed up backstory makes 2004!Erik worse than he needs to be (God... what the hell were you thinking ALW and JS?!)

-If CS is familiar with the musical, I wonder if he’s aware that 2004!Erik was many a teenage girls’ crush with that in mind.

-Ah the return of the original ‘creepy doll that looks like a character’ that I almost forgot about. Except CS makes it more creepier by pointing out something about it that makes 2004!Erik more creepier than he needs to.

-CS keeps referring to actors by whatever they were in/a character they also played. And I’m just reminded how strange it was to see Emmy in Shameless (and she’s not enough to make me want to watch that show).

-CS forgot that the managers were supposed to be ass-kissing when he wondered why they were in the dressing room.

-If I remember correctly, a company performs one opera production at night and then practices/rehearses for the next one during the day. The one they perform happens for a certain amount of time before its time to switch out. But yeah, the film makes it look like this is all happening in 24 hours which shouldn’t be possible.

-Nothing for that guy mooning Carlotta? Ok then, moving on I suppose.

-I’ve seen this movie hundreds of times and I NEVER saw the boat in the woman’s wig until it was pointed out.

-Was he not paying attention? Erik kills Bouquet because the guy was trying to go after him. The original reason why he died in the book was for the same reason.

-I’m glad that CS has sympathy for Christine for all she went though in a supposed 24 hours. I’d crack under all that too.

-Surprised he didn’t sin the snot shot on the roof. (You know what I’m talking about).

-Yeah, so much for a secret engagement if you got the ring exposed.

-Not sure why CS finds the gold guys funny other than they are ‘just there.’

-I would love to see the party-goers go after Erik since they DO outnumber him as an alternate scene during that moment after ‘Masquerade.’

-No ‘This is Sparta’ jokes? Ok then, moving on I suppose.

-Christine’s dad is implied to be famous in this movie (explaining the mausoleum, but in the book he was poor so he shouldn’t have one). But that does raise questions as to why Christine seemingly has little money to her name in this version.

-Dude, seeing the gave fight scene as Nite Owl vs. Leonidas was something I couldn’t unsee for more than 10 years. But I bet the Snyder fans loved that joke. (Speaking of CS and superhero films WHEN WILL YOU STOP TEASING ME WITH ‘ANIMATED SUPERHERO FILMS’ THAT ARE JUST ANIMATED DC FILMS AND SHOW ME THE ONE I ACTUALLY WANT TO SEE?!)

-I would love to see a Home Alone version of PotO since CS pointed it out.

-Actually I would love to see the au where CS is a critic in the PotO world and just not give a shit if Erik threatened him.

-Yeah, Raoul making Christine the bait and endangering her IS messed up. As much of a dolt he is, novel!Raoul would NEVER have done that to her.

-Erik’s hair looks nice because its a wig, CS.

-Oh boy, the reveal of the bad make up. No surprise it got a sin. I loved that CS showed Lon Chaney’s version (and hopefully will get people to watch the original silent PotO) and was more impressed by it over what this movie had. I also love how blunt CS is in summing up the deformity.

-There wasn’t a fire when the mob went after the Phantom in the musical. But as history can prove, some mobs care more about their goals than their own safety.

-I think they wanted to squeeze in one more trap before the final confrontation and Raoul WAS trapped in a room that became filled with water in the book and silent film. Though I’m amazed CS didn’t notice the reverse direction the bubbles were going during that scene.

-I don’t know how to answer why Christine was just standing around and doing jack shit to help Raoul during the final confrontation.

-A recreation of one of the most famous kiss scenes in musical history and CS just sums it up as ‘yeah your first kiss always sucks.’

-I love the contrast of Super Mario music with shots of PotO for the bonus round.

-Holy crap, that WAS a lot of candles.

-Some of the alternate audios for the last bit were unfamiliar but that Bug’s Life scene for when Christine is heading towards the mirror is perfection.

-And of COURSE CS would use that one Mission Impossible scene.

Final verdict: Predictable at times, but pretty amusing for a PotO fan like myself. I do hope the next movie musical CS covers is ‘Little Shop of Horrors.’

[geekkatsblog]

Reviewing Grey's Anatomy Episodes but this time its Season 17

(To those people on my page who don't watch Grey's Anatomy but are being subjected to this I'm so sorry but I really just like to vent about this show.)

Its season 17 now Yay.

They're dealing with the covid 19 pandemic and I'm sure the writers probably did lots of research to make sure that they had the most accurate representation of the situation in the hospitals and otherwise.

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First we're going to start with the love triangle that is Teddy, Tom and Owen.

Owen

Now this is in no way excusing what he's done in the past for the longest while I've loathed Owen Hunt but..... now I feel sorry for him. He saw he had a problem he went to therapy to get himself right, he was actually a good partner for once and communicated in his relationship, he took his time and didn't jump into marriage spontaneously and then Teddy cheated on him over but dial to be heard by everyone in the operating theater with Owen on their wedding day. (I don't want to sound bad but this might also be karma coming to but him in the ass.) I felt so much 2nd hand embarrassment for him and the pain he had in his face the whole time he pretended not to know about her cheating was just oof. I loved though the end where he drove away for the mean time I really do agree with him taking some time and space before he makes a decision. Most of the times he made a lot of sudden decisions that later came back to bite him.

Teddy

Oh Teddy, she used to be one of my favorite characters from a little after she came to the time she left but now they just carried her character so far down hill that it's hard to keep the same energy I had before, now. Everyone at Grey Sloan is on Owen's side and giving her the cold shoulder and she really wants everyone to mind their own business (I honestly agree though, you're in the middle of a pandemic mind your business and do your job now isn't the time to be shunning coworkers because they cheated.) However when she did explain her side I kinda understood it a bit better. It's still an awful thing to do but I know plenty of people who sabotage their own happiness because they aren't used to it. Hell I do it myself sometimes. But then I was also pissed when she just pretended she did nothing wrong at first. First thing first she acted kinda offended when Owen explained why he hadn't called to cancel the wedding to her. Was it kinda sus? The answer is yes but you literally cheated on him that same day, you needed the extra time sis. Not to mention the several time he hinted to her that he knew and gave her the chance to confess yet she lied through her teeth whenever he hinted at it and flat out lied again when he asked if she had anything to confess. I get the whole sabotage route but God was I happy when Owen got in his truck, drove off and left her.

Tom

I was honestly rooting for Tom in the beginning, despite him being a douche I knew deep down he had a heart somewhere, but I actually started to feel less sorry for him last season when he continued to sleep with Teddy despite knowing her situation which he pointed out to her several times and she still ignored it. I know he loves her but let's be honest, she's going to pick Owen as long as he decides to actually take her back and Tom will be left alone and heart broken with his $100000 worth of boxes in booties and a golf club to measure 6 ft distance between him and everyone else. Honestly I kinda saw a panic attack coming, if they're treating Teddy bad then they're probably treating him even more like crap based on the fact that no one besides Teddy, Catherine and maybe Amelia liked him to begin with. This may also be an unpopular opinion but I actually agree with Catherine for making him resign of chief of all chiefs his head hasn't and probably won't be in the game for a while. At least he still gets to be head of neuro. He bought a whole $100000 dollars in booties alone by mistake during an already tough pandemic between that and everything else going on around him I'm not surprised he broke. What did surprise me was that no one even went near him to help even after the attack was finished. Dislike him or not at least ask him how he's doing geeze.

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Jo and Jackson (Never thought I'd have to put the two of them together in a title.)

Truly the biggest shock of the night besides the trailer for next week which I will freak out about later.

Jo

So Jo has decided that in order for her to feel herself again she has to do the devils tango with someone and because they're in a pandemic and she trusts him she chose Jackson. The night of the appointment to do the deed Jo ends up crying in his mouth. The way she treated him afterwards at first was a little uncalled for in my opinion, I mean she was the one who asked for the favor. But later they talked and it was all cool again. Jo didn't really have that big of a plot this episode so not too much to talk about.

Jackson

Agreed way to quickly to doing the devils tango with Jo if you ask me. Seems a little sus. I really hope they aren't rushing him and Jo into anything give the girl some room to breath and also give Jackson a proper plot he seems to be a plot filler for everyone right now like they have no real purpose for him on the show at the moment. I'm beginning to really think that he was the one who was supposed to die last season. I really do love his and Richard's relationship. Jackson never really had a good father and Webber seems to be filling that spot quite nicely. Him pushing Webber to fight to get better and convince him that his career can be saved was heartwarming. And can we take a moment to talk about Harriet finally appearing from the world of Narnia to bless us with her presence? And boy was she a blessing. That baby that plays Harriet was awesome from her repeating Vic saying she can't be a step mom all to her facial expressions. I hope to see baby Harriet again very soon. But speaking of Vic, did she not know that Jackson was a father? How the hell did she expect to never run into her at some point? Then there's the whole question of what did she even expect of the relationship with Jackson if she never intended to even try to accept being around his daughter? also if she really want to be Robbie Rotten from Lazy town and avoid being around kids, maybe she should call or text first instead of showing up in just a fluffy jacket and nothing else.

___________________________________________

Deluca

Glad to see he finally got the help he needed and is back put tho work. I felt so upset last season when everyone just treated him like crap without trying to help him, but they made up for it a little by trying to help him with the intervention. He was also right about the sex trafficking case and I was so glad to see that he was able to be there as her doctor. Plus he's now also finally in dark blue scrubs it has felt like forever before he got those but I digress. He is now on his way once again to be a kick ass surgeon with the awesome skills hes already showcasing. I just hope he continues to look after himself. Deluca shine like the star you are babe.

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Maggie

Has finally found a man who understands her, he is so nice and kind and caring the whole episode I was mentally yelling go get it hun to the screen. She deserves someone who can take her seriously and understand her awkwardness as well as her tendencies finally she has stepped out of the role of cheerleader and support character and is branching out to something else and I'm here for it. And her yelling at Catherine, to share her piece of mind. I was so proud. Go get it sis.

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Richard

Richard Webber is back in the building, finally the king has returned to himself and already solving problems in day one. At the beginning when he publicly called Catherine a pain in the ass I was so stoked I finally thought that he was done being pushed around by her but then he took her back in the end it also kinda felt like she bought him in order to get him back with the hiring him as the new chief of chiefs but I wish them the best of luck, Webber deserves to be happy. I was also happy to see him and Bailey interacting like friends again. For a while it was awkward between them but now it's like the balance has been restored. Side note, him laughing at Teddy and Owen made me laugh so loudly especially when he asked Teddy if her name was still Altman despite the fact he clearly knew about the phonecall drama, not gonna lie I'd do the same.

___________________________________________

Catherine

Not much there, just her being angry at the pandemic and loss of money, lack of power to save lives as well as trying to win Webber back which she successfully did after firing Koracick and giving Richard his job and finally giving him a heartfelt apology without being petty.

___________________________________________

Bailey

It might just be me but so far despite the fact that it's only been 2 episodes. Bailey seems somewhat better this season. Her guilt over Deluca was definitely warranted but at least she tried to make up for it (and just like Harriet her OCD has decided to rejoin us for a visit from Narnia.) For the past few seasons she's been a slight pain but now she seems more like herself.

Her and Ben are adorable as usual, coming every 12 hours to clap for the doctors just to see her then the cute hand signals they made for each other, between Ben, Link and recently added to the group of awesome partners Winston, I'm beginning to wonder where I can find me one of these super thoughtful understanding handsome men. The two guys that knocked her over as well spraining her ankle really should have to pay or something or at least apologize, they literally just knocked a doctor off her feet and made her wheel chair bound, the chief ro be exact. Her and Webber are on talking terms and well again but she really needs to know how to express concern better. She once told Ben that when she's scared she yells but a lot of things would have gone a lot more smoothly if she'd just reminded him he was a high risk for covid and state her concern for him to begin with instead of barking out orders.

I'm also wondering if shes going to be able to handle the whole Covid situation so well for the whole time, with all the chaos and disorganization with the whole ordeal not to mention the whole fit she had with the germs in the episode. I think it'll be a good storyline now that Grey's seems to be bringing mental awareness back up.

___________________________________________

Link and Amelia

They have now officially reached my list along with Ben and Bailey and a few others that are no longer on the show that have reached the stage of killing the couple goals on this show.

Despite the fact that they're not only raising their own baby but also Bailey, Ellis and Zola yet their relationship is still solid. I'm so proud of my baby Amelia she has come a long way from the woman who didn't even want kids to begin with.

I loved the fact that he wasn't upset over her forgetting his birthday and acted like nothing was wrong, just so she wouldn't feel bad about forgetting. I would have been livid set a reminder on your phone babes. Either way she definitely made up for it later with the whole redoing his birthday thing. Also welcome to the world Scout. Looking forward to seeing them more often.

___________________________________________

Levi

How did it all turn so bad, Nico has turned into such a jerk at this point I'm not even sure I'd be to upset if he left if it wasn't for the fact that I ship the person he was before and Levi so much I'm still hoping that they'll go back to how they were before Nico became a lying hypocrite. At the end I was practically begging Levi to push him away, Nico doesn't deserve it not after the way he treated him and he hasn't even shown a hint of remorse to this day.

___________________________________________

Meredith

The biggest shock of the whole episode. I honestly knew something was going to happen to her from the time she fell asleep and started the dream on the beach. Dreaming of beaches have never been a good sign on Grey's I just thought she was going to collapse from stress because she really had been pushing herself all episode. The thing with Meredith is that she cares so much for her patients and does anything she can to save them, but based on the preview of the next episode and the tests they showed it doesn't seem to be test. And let's just talk about that huge bombshell they dropped by bringing back Derek I never thought I'd see Patrick Dempsey on the show again. By the end of the episode I was already literally shaking in anticipation for the next episode. I know they can't kill Meredith, without her there literally is no Grey's Anatomy. That being said I really hope they don't give her cancer, (I know Patrick is involved with helping a charity for cancer.) And I also really hope she isn't getting alzheimers I just hope it's nothing serious in general. She's been through enough man. I just want this to be a really touching moment where I get to see Merder have some touching moments and it doesn't end up to be Izzie and Denny all over again. I don't think anyone is ready to handle that. I read in a spoiler that there's supposed to be some more visitors arriving on the beach and I'm stoked for it so I really hope it's a real spoiler I'm tired of rewatching the newer seasons to experience some of the old joy.

___________________________________________

Imma need them to give that intern Perez an official recurring contract for the show because he is currently one of the best things to come on that show in years. He's a breath of fresh air.

[lettersinscarlet]

Favorite Story (Colby Brock Imagine)

Hey everyone! It’s me! No, I’m not dead or deactivated hahaha. I just found it a bit hard to get any inspiration to write longer fics, so this one is a little short, sorry about that. Anyway, I’m trying to go through these requests and I’m sorry that it’s gonna take forever for me to do them, but I’m working. Anyway, my requests are open for the Trap House on this blog, and you can make requests for my other fandoms on my @multi-fandom-chik blog. Anyway, enjoy!

Request: hi! can i make a request?? reader is best friends with jake (they met in LA) and she’s dating colby and colby gets jealous and reader has to reassure him that she loves him and jake is with tara anyway. i just really need more jake content on here

——————————————————————————

“Jake!” you squealed, rushing over to see him. You gave him a hug, the both of your laughter seeming to fill the space. “What’s up, brother?”

“Not much, brother,” he answered. It only took a moment, but soon you were engaged in a full conversation, talking about the recent things that had been happening with each of you. Jake was in the middle of telling you this hilarious story, and your laughter was filling the room.

You couldn’t tell, but Colby was brooding. Well, he wouldn’t call it brooding, but he was obviously upset. He couldn’t help but feel jealous. It seemed that you were closer to Jake than you were with him, and that was a problem, considering that he was your boyfriend.

He decided he would try to shake it off. He knew that it had been a little while since you had been able to just talk with your best friend, and he didn’t want to be overbearing. He went to get up and find Sam or someone to talk to.

“Oh my gosh, do you remember the first time we met?” you asked Jake, barely containing your laughter as you recalled the memory.

“Of course I remember,” he said, already shaking with contained giggles. “You were new to LA and had just moved into the building. It was like, what, two or three in the morning?” You nodded and he laughed a little more. “I had just got back from hanging out with everyone, and I went to get in the elevator to take me up to my floor. But when I went to get on, there you were. You were in some type of pajama pants and a t-shirt, but you looked absolutely exhausted, and you didn’t have on shoes.” He was laughing super loud now, and you couldn’t help but join in. “I’ll never forget what you said next, though.”

“What did I say?” you asked.

“You said, ‘I swear I’m not usually like this, but I’m just hungry,’” he quoted, doing his best to impersonate a tired and groggy version of you. You playfully shoved him, and he rubbed his arm. “So I offered you some food so you wouldn’t have to go out, and the rest is history,” he finished.

You smiled, and you looked around to see if you could find Colby. You hadn’t seen him for awhile now, and you were a little worried.

“I’ve gotta go find Colby. I’ll be back!” you said. He gave you a fist bump before you left, going to search for your boyfriend.

Colby has gone outside, and he was leaning against a wall. He was just trying to calm down. He knew you loved him, so he didn’t understand why he felt this way. He just felt so upset, and he needed to calm down.

You had found Sam, asking him if he knew where Colby was. He told you and you thanked him before you walked and found Colby.

“Hey, Colbs,” you greeted him when you found him. “Why aren’t you inside?” You saw him make an effort to give a smile as he looked at you.

“Oh, I just needed some fresh air. You can go ahead back in, I’ll be there in a little bit.”

Instead of listening, you walked over to where he was and leaned against the wall with him. You looked over to him, and he looked at the ground.

“What’s wrong, Colby?” you asked, waiting to hear his answer. He sighed, before glancing away.

“You don’t want to be Jake’s boyfriend, do you?” he asked. You were stunned, definitely not expecting that question.

“What? Why would you think that?” He sighed again, and you leaned closer to pay more attention to him.

“It’s just- look, I know you guys are friends, but I saw you talking to him, and it looked like you would be happier if you were in a relationship with him and not with me,” he explained, still not looking at you.

You brought your hand up to his chin, softly turning his attention to you.

“Colby, I promise, I do not want to be dating Jake,” you told him slowly. “We just have a deep connection because he was the first person I met when I moved here.”

“I wish I was the person you met when you moved,” he muttered.

“What?” you gasped. “But if you were, then I wouldn’t have the story of how I met you! And that story is one of my favorites,” you defended. You saw his face perk up a little as he looked at you.

“Really?” he asked.

“Really.” You took a breath before you were ready to launch into the story.

“So, I was planning to stop by Jake’s apartment because he had asked me to hang out. I figured he was home, so I was going to just go and knock, considering I didn’t have his number yet. Well, when I got there, you were in the middle of the hallway, carrying a whole ton of cardboard cutouts of yourself.” You saw him grin at the memory and you chuckled. “I asked if you were going to introduce me to your friends and you were confused before I pointed to the cutouts you were carrying. After that, you let me know you were pranking Jake, and you asked if I wanted to help. I didn’t really know Jake yet, so I didn’t want to get on his bad side, so I said no. But I definitely wanted to watch. So we talked and I got to know you, and here we are,” you finished, leaning against him.

His mood was definitely cheerier as he wrapped his arm around you and kissed your forehead.

“Trust me, Colby, there is no one that I would rather be in a relationship with than you. I love you. Also, Jake is dating stars anyway, so he doesn’t want to date me either. You have nothing to worry about,” you reassured him with a smile.

He pulled you in for a kiss. It was short and sweet, but his lips were soft against yours, letting you know that your words did help him feel better. He pulled away and reached down to grab your hand.

“Okay. I think I’m good to go back inside again,” he said, “if you’re ready, too.” You nodded and you started your way back in.

“Oh, by the way,” you added, causing him to stop, “you got my number before Jake did.”

You saw some emotion flash across his face before he smiled at you.

“And you also got my number, too. My number one in my heart, because you’re the best.” You giggled and he grinned, before he pulled you back inside to the rest of the group, happy to know that you only wanted to be with him.

———

Taglist:

@sp00kybrock @yikes-xander @daddydobrock @trapbrock-local @thenameisbabe @far-to-many-bands @magicxshadows @lyssaholic @wacky-webber-458 @colbysbaby @katiaw2 @brocks-girl @chesterbenningtonaremylife @frickin-bats @turnupbrock @nyctophobics @disaster-rose

[doc-pickles]

things just happened (and so did you)

I told you guys I was finishing this up! Even though it took me foreeeever, I really enjoyed writing this piece! I used to kinda hate writing pieces that follow canon episodes, but this was a fun project to work on. Hope you guys enjoy!

xoxo Nina

Her breath caught in her throat as time seemed to freeze around her, Jo forgetting about Alex and Frankie, her baby, everything that had happened today as the world around her shrunk down to her and the man in front of her.

Paul. Paul had found her. 

  Jo barely registered Arizona and Paul speaking, her blood pumping loudly in her ear as she tried in vain to process what was happening. Her day had been so normal, well as normal as any day at Grey Sloan, and now… Now her ex husband was standing in front of her and her boyfriend was waiting for her down the hall and she was pregnant and she had a patient that might be dead by the time she got to his room.

“I’m sorry, I have to go,” Jo made her leave from the tense environment she’d found herself in while Arizona was still there, but that didn’t stop Paul from grabbing her arm and staring her down.

“You go, we’ll meet up later,” Paul met Jo’s eyes and that twinkle that she’d always feared was lingering there. “It’s okay, I’ll find you.”

Her legs were the only thing keeping Jo afloat right now, her body seemingly knowing exactly where to go as she navigated the hallways of the pediatric ward. Her heart was beating out of time and her breathing was staggered, the all too familiar signs of an anxiety attack creeping up and through her body. She needed to get to Alex before she let her emotions overtake her, she needed to make sure that Frankie was okay.

“The Heparin should have helped by now,” Alex’s voice rang through the hallway as Jo approached Frankie’s room, making her heart drop. “I think I made the wrong call.”

“Wait. Heparin? No. I texted,” Amelia and Alex both turned to look at Jo, eyes wide with frantic expressions painted on their faces. “They didn't reverse him.”

A brief silence fell over the three doctors as they watched Frankie lying helplessly in his mom's arms. Jo could feel the bile rising again, begging her body to cooperate for just another minute as she settled her hand onto her stomach again, pressing a bit harder than she had before. She’d failed at the one thing that she’d tried so hard to accomplish, the thing that had driven her to run around the hospital like a chicken with it’s head cut off in search of solid answers. 

“Damn it. We can't access the reversal agent,” Alex looked to Amelia, who nodded at him as they moved into the room. “Prep him to move.”

“What is it? What's wrong,” Frankie’s mom sounded desperate, Jo’s heart aching as she listened to the pleading mother.

“Frankie's AVM might be bleeding. We've got to get him to the O.R. now.”

“But the medicine you gave him,” her hands were brushing Frankie’s curls back now, staring forlornly at her son who laid pale and weak on the bed. “It was supposed to help.”

“I'm sorry. We need to go,” Alex ushered Frankie’s mom, Helm and Amelia out of the room, eyes drifting to Jo who stood in the doorway, face blanched as she stared helplessly at the scene before her.

“Hey. I'm so sorry,” Jo’s eyes flitted from Alex to her feet, the overwhelming feeling of guilt and anxiety climbing to new heights as she felt his glare. “I texted. It didn't go through.  And then…”

There was a pause and Jo could feel the tension between her and Alex. It didn’t seem real that they’d just been hugging and kissing only hours ago, elated over the new journey they were about to embark on. 

“And then what,” Alex’s voice was dripping with venom as he stared Jo down, waiting for an answer from her. 

“Nothing. It can wait,” Jo finally looked up from her feet, teary eyes meeting Alex’s angry ones as she sucked in a deep breath. “Just go help him.”

Staring at her only a second more, Alex turned and left the room. Once he was out of sight, Jo let the sob she’d been holding back take over her body as she rushed into the bathroom and emptied her stomach into the toilet. She was almost certain she wasn’t going to make it through today.

-

Alex felt bad, but only a little bit. He knew that he had pushed Jo to the side as they’d rushed to get Frankie to an OR, but the combination of the rising heat and the cyber attack had begun to drive him insane. He’d apologize later, his guilt would eat him alive in the meantime. And he really did need to focus on helping Frankie right now. 

Pulling his scrub cap and shoe covers on, Alex sighed as he thought about the day he’d had so far. All he wanted was to curl up in bed with Jo and hold her close, forgetting about the day they’d had and enjoying the excitement of their new future. As he let his mind wander, Alex’s gaze hovered to his right, visions of Jo vanishing from his head as his blood ran cold at the man he saw sitting next to him.   

“What are you doing here?”

“Hi. Paul Stadler,” the man’s cheery tone didn’t distract Alex from the fact that he was sitting next to a complete monster. “Orlando Medical.”

“Yeah, I know who you are,” Alex spit the words out, watching carefully as Paul’s jaw tensed. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“I’m sorry,” Paul’s tone had an air of amusement to it and Alex had to clench his fists to hold back from punching the man. “Have we met before? You know, your face looks kind of familiar.”

Everything fell into place now, Jo’s late arrival to Frankie’s room, her skittish behavior, the sorrowful look on her face. The feeling of guilt settled heavily in his stomach now, realizing that Jo had run into Paul and he had treated her like absolute shit right after. 

“You… you absolute fucking piece of garbage,” the words are out of Alex’s mouth before he can reign them in, his eyes ablaze as he stares down a confused looking Paul. “I know what you did, I know why she’s the way she is. And if I were you, I’d be halfway out the door right now because if I didn’t have Jo to think about then you’d be in a pile on the floor already.” 

“Doctor Karev,” both Alex and Paul looked up as Helm’s voice interrupted their heated conversation. “Doctor Shepherd said Frankie's angio shows a bleed.”

“Yikes,” Paul smirked at Alex, his eyes alight with a devilish expression. “Don't let me keep you, Doctor Karev.” 

Alex stared down Paul, not moving until Helm beckoned him again. He made his way to the scrub room, hands under the water and scrubbing harshly before he could verbalize how angry he was. 

“Intern, what's your name,” Alex knew his tone was harsh, but he couldn’t hold back.

“Helm. Like ‘Hellmouth’ without the ‘outh’,” the blonde girl was tying her scrub cap and mask into place, watching Alex cautiously.

“Don't scrub,” Alex ignored the confused looks of both Amelia and Helm, continuing on. “I need you to find Dr. Wilson and bring her here.”

“You want me to call her?”

“No, I want you to find her and bring her here,” Alex stopped scrubbing to stare pointedly at Helm, eyes meeting her with a serious expression. “And don't leave her side.”

“Why?”

“Just do it. Now!”

Helm ran off then, leaving Alex and Amelia alone and in the middle of an awkward silence. 

“What's going on,” Alex wanted so badly to answer Amelia’s question, to let everything that had happened that day out and into the open, but he couldn’t. He knew that once he started talking that the words would never stop. He needed to focus. Focus on Frankie, on Jo, on their child. All of them were innocent in this and all of them were now at risk if he blew his lid like he so desperately wanted to. 

“Nothing, let’s get in there.”

-

Jo couldn’t breathe, she was gasping for air and clutching her chest by the time she made it outside. How had this happened? How had such a happy day turned into a living nightmare for her? She’d pissed off Alex, possibly killed a little boy, and her abusive ex husband was running around Grey Sloan right now. 

Trying to contain her emotions Jo took a steadying breath before heading back inside. She needed to focus on something, anything else, before she drove herself to insanity. 

“Heat getting to you?”

Jo hadn’t made it more than 30 feet inside the hospital before running into Doctor Webber. She probably looked like death, she’d been crying and throwing up for the past half hour. 

“Yeah.”

“How is it I never knew you studied under Paul Stadler,” just the sound of his name sent Jo’s mind spiralling again, one hand coming up to wipe the sweat collecting on her forehead. 

“Uh, it's a... long story,” Jo’s head was swimming now, her vision spotty as she reached out for the counter of the nurses station. 

“Wilson,” Webber’s hand was on her arm then, the feeling of another person bringing Jo back down to earth and calming her slightly. “You feeling okay?”

If only you knew the half of it. Jo had to restrain her word vomit explaining her pregnancy and her past with Paul and the horror and fear climbing up her throat at an alarming rate. 

“Yeah I just need to sit down,” her voice was weak, her body was weak, and all Jo wanted was Alex, who was angry with her and in a complicated surgery, to come and hold her. She’d never had another person to turn to when she’d been with Paul before, but now that she did Jo found herself craving his presence. 

“Let me help you, come on,” Doctor Webber led Jo to a chair, watching carefully as she settled her head between her legs. “You want me to page Karev?”

“No! No, he’s in surgery,” Jo was quick to push off the suggestion of Alex, not wanting to bother him while he was working on Frankie no matter how much she wanted him there with her. “I’ll be okay, I swear.”

“Doctor Wilson.”

Jo’s head popped up nervously at the sound of Helm‘s voice. She’d been with Alex and Frankie, what the hell was she doing here? 

“What is it?”

“Dr. Karev said I had to find you and bring you to him,” Helm wrung her hands awkwardly as she looked between Jo and Webber “And I'm not allowed to leave you alone.”

Helm’s words made Jo’s stomach sink as the realization that Alex had seen Paul floated into her mind. Alex knew he was here and he hadn’t killed Paul and all he wanted was for her to be with him. An odd combination of fear and relief flooded Jo’s chest then, her breaths coming out quietly as she met Helm’s gaze. 

“Oh shit…,” Jo nodded and stood, Webber’s hand coming to help her.  “Okay let’s go Helm. Thank you Doctor Webber.”

Jo walked behind Helm, hand cupping her stomach gently as she felt a small wave of relief rush over her. She would be fine facing Paul now because she knew that she had Alex by her side. 

-

Alex was radiating nervous energy as he and Amelia worked on Frankie. They’d gotten him into the OR fast enough that there was no major damage, calming Alex only slightly. He’d sent Helm out over 45 minutes ago and she still hadn’t returned. 

“Shunt's in,” Amelia's voice brought Alex out of his reverie, their eyes meeting momentarily. “Nice work, Karev.”

Alex’s eyes flitted behind Amelia, finding Helm in the scrub room as she motioned towards the door. She’d found Jo. 

“Can you finish this up,” Amelia fixed Alex with a pointed look, her blue eyes begging him to explain what was going on with him today. 

“Alex, what’s happening?”

“Nothing, family emergency,” Alex looked to Helm again, her nervous energy doing nothing to calm his frayed nerves. “I’ll explain later. It’s just… I have to go.”

“Then go. Frankie is in very capable hands here.”

Alex thanked Amelia once more, knowing he’d have to explain to her later exactly what was happening. Ripping off his mask, Alex began to scrub out, eyes flitting to Helm. 

“Where is she?”

“The on call room down the hall,” Helm watched Alex as he scrubbed, waiting for him to say more. “Anything else sir?”

“No no, you’ve been great,” Alex eyed Helm then turned back to his hands. “Scrub in and see what Shepherd needs for the rest of the day.”

Heart pounding, Alex left the scrub room and let his feet pound loudly down the hallway as he raced toward Jo.  He burst into the first on call room he found, finding Jo pacing nervously across the small room. He didn’t miss the involuntary flinch of her body as her eyes darted up to look at him. 

For a long moment, Alex and Jo stood across from each other saying nothing. Jo’s features were clouded with fear, her brows furrowed as she wrung her hands. Alex could feel the tension radiating off of his own body as he finally broke their brief silence. 

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

“I ran into Paul, before Frankie’s surgery,” Alex watched as Jo’s face remained unchanged. Instead her eyes focused on him and his demeanor. 

“Yeah I figured.”

“Are you okay?”

“I’m… I’m fine, I’m okay,” Jo stumbled over her words as her eyes met Alex’s for the first time. That seemed to break Jo’s trance, her tears finally beginning to fall down her face as she shook her head. Her fingers clutched at her scrub top, her hand resting uneasily on her abdomen as she began to sob in earnest. 

“Come here babe,” Alex moved forward and pulled Jo into his arms, her body falling weakly into him. “It’s okay, you’re okay. I’ve got you, you’re safe. I’m not gonna let anything happen to either of you.”

“He’s here and he’s going to ruin me again and I-I… I can’t do it again. I have this baby and this life and and you. ” Jo’s desperate cries grew louder as Alex tightened his grip on her shoulders, pressing her closer to his chest. “I can’t fight him again. I have too much to lose.”

Alex pressed his lips into Jo’s hair, working to calm her cries as his hands rub her back slowly. He’d seen her cry before, hell he’d made her cry before, but the distraught sobs coming from her now were different from any of that. Jo had never told him exactly what had happened with Paul, only sparse details here and there. But he’d held her when her nightmares got to be too much, he’d seen the way she reacted to the domestic abuse victims they handled, he knew that today was her worst case scenario.

“You’re not alone, I’m not letting you do this alone Jo,” Alex kept his voice low and calm, Jo’s face still pressed against his chest. “We can do this however you want, but I’m not leaving you no matter what. You’ve got me and Mer and dozens of other people in your corner, okay? Nothing is going to happen to you or our baby.”

Alex’s hand slid from Jo’s back to her stomach, a mirror of his actions earlier when he’d looked at the pregnancy tests she’d handed him. Just hours ago, things had been so good for them and now… well now Alex could only pray that the day ended well. 

+

They stay in each other’s arms for a while longer, not exchanging any words but just taking time to rest in each other’s embrace. When they finally leave the on call room, Alex and Jo bump into Meredith, who drags them into an empty patient room and gives them some unfortunate news. 

“I just operated with Paul Stadler,” her eyes instantly flit to Jo, who’s face blanches as she turns to lean over the waste bin in the corner to vomit. “Well I’m assuming you already knew he was here.”

Alex’s hand is on Jo’s back in an instant, fingers gently rubbing circles as she continues to vomit. Meredith eyes the two for a second, taking in Alex’s unfazed expression before gasping in shock. 

“Oh my god! You- oh god,” Alex looks up at Meredith, whose eyes are wide as she takes in the sight before her. “Oh we’ve gotta get rid of him, this is not good.” 

“Yeah no shit Mer,” Alex turns back to Jo, who’s standing upright now and leaning into his embrace. “How do you want to handle this? We’re playing by your rules.”

“I want to be divorced,” Jo settles her head on Alex’s shoulder. “I want to never see his face ever again.”

“Well then, I'm coming with you for that,” Alex insists. 

“No, you are not going anywhere near him,” Meredith interrupts, both Jo and Alex looking at her. “Alex, you nearly killed a man you thought was hurting Jo. I don’t think you should be near Paul again.”

Jo’s eyes move from Meredith up to Alex, a silent conversation happening between the two as Meredith stared on. Finally Alex spoke up, looking pointedly at his friend, “I’m not leaving Jo’s side until that bastard is out of this hospital. And that’s final.”

“Okay fine, but I’m coming too,” Meredith glances between the two before letting out a sigh. “Someone has to make sure you both make it out of this ordeal.”

-

Alex hesitantly leaves Jo to round on Frankie, leaving Jo and Meredith to keep themselves busy while trying to avoid running into Paul. The last thing either of them want is an awkward confrontation, especially one that might set Alex off.

“Today was so good and then everything just… crumbled,” Jo groans as she lays back on the couch in the resident’s lounge, eyes closing as she settles a hand onto her still flat stomach. “The last thing I imagined was him showing up and now it’s my reality and I just don’t think I have it in me to fight back this time.”

Meredith stares at Jo for a moment, eyeing the young resident as she takes slow steadying breaths. She lays her hand on Jo’s shoulder, speaking in a steady tone, “You are amazing, you’re brave and resilient and you haven’t come this far to just come this far. You are Jo Wilson, I know exactly who you are.”

Jo peaks her eyes open to look up at Meredith, tears glistening in them as she stares at the woman who used to kick her out of bed. Her heart warms a bit at the thought of Meredith thinking so highly of her, but she pushes it down and offers up a thank you instead. 

“Hey, he’s down the hall,” both Jo and Meredith look up to see Alex standing in the doorway, eyebrows furrowed as he stares at Jo. “I uh, saw him when I was leaving Frankie’s room and Arizona’s with him… He’s got the divorce papers and everything, just waiting for you.”

A sudden wave of fear washes over Jo, the certainty she’d felt regarding her impending divorce now leaving her as she looks up at Alex. She knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she wanted to be done with Paul and that chapter of her life, but facing him, even with Alex and Meredith by her side, still scared her shitless.

“Come on, I’ll be right next to you the whole time,” Alex steps forward and extends his hand towards Jo, waiting for her to grasp it before pulling her up and into his arms. “In just a few minutes, this will all be over and you’ll never have to see him again.”

Jo nods, knowing Alex was right and that once she signed her name on the papers that she would finally be free of Paul Stadler once and for all. She would be able to move on, to finally accept Alex’s marriage proposal and take his last name like she’d wanted to since the first time he’d asked her to. Jo would finally have control over her own life, that thought alone pushing her out of the room and down the hall towards the room that Alex led her too. 

“Ready?,” Alex asks, squeezing Jo’s hand once more.

“As I’ll ever be.” Jo and Alex walk into the room, Meredith standing outside the door to keep watch. Arizona smiles at the duo, walking out of the room and shutting the door behind her. Jo takes a breath and settles herself into the chair across from Paul, eyes meeting his in an act of unexpected bravery as she spoke, “You have the divorce papers?”

Paul’s eyes move from Jo to Alex, his throat clearing as he looks up at him, “Uh, if you wouldn't mind, Dr. Karev, I'd like to have a moment alone with-”

“Actually, I do mind,” Alex’s voice came out harsh and cold, taking on a tone that Jo hadn’t heard since she was an intern. “I'm gonna stay right here.”

“Okay then,” Paul sighs, turning back to Jo and gesturing towards the papers between them. “Let's get this done, shall we?” Jo reaches for the stack of papers, grabbing a pen and signing the pre flagged pages before passing it across the table. Her eyes flit up to Alex, who met her with a small smile. She could feel the relief already coursing through her as she watched Paul signing the same pages she had. When he finishes and folds the pages back, Alex reaches forward and grabs the stack of papers.

“We've got it. It's faster this way.”

“I'm really happy for you, Jo,” Paul meets Jo’s eyes as he stands, fingers drumming along the table in a way that makes her heart clench. “I hope this brings you... some real peace. You deserve it. We both do.”

She almost leaves it at that, almost lets him walk away with no words said, but she couldn’t. Jo stands, eyes blazing as she speaks to Paul, “You don't deserve anything good. You're a monster.”

“Glad to see nothing has changed,” Paul spit, turning around with an all too familiar glint of anger in his eyes. He twists towards Alex, voice still dripping with venom. “You better watch out, she can be a real piece of work.”

“I know her well enough without your twisted view clouding my judgment,” Alex spat back, taking a step towards Paul as he clenched and unclenched his fists at his side.

“Okay, walk away, Dr. Stadler,” Meredith walks into the room then, standing right inside the doorway as she watches Alex and Paul stare each other down. 

“No, no. She is a liar. She is pathological. I mean, what kind of woman changes her name and disappears on her husband without a word,” Paul’s bitter tone carries through the room, echoing the nightmares that haunted Jo as she stares at him in horror. “Do you know what that did to me? What that did to my reputation, to my career? 

“You are... torture. You are hell. You walk around and you ruin lives, and no one ever stops you. They... they just believe you. 'Cause why? 'Cause you're pretty? 'Cause you're sweet,” Paul slams his hands onto the table, Jo involuntarily jumping as he leans towards her. “Your looks will fade one day, Brooke. Your looks will fade, and you'll be left with the truth. And you point fingers at everyone else around you, but you're the monster.”

“Okay that’s enough you need to leave,” Meredith’s stern tone finally gets through to Paul, the man leaving the conference room without another word. As soon as he ‘s out of sight, Jo collapses into a fit of tears, Alex wrapping his arms around her shaking body as she sinks to the ground. 

“You did great, it's over now,” Alex whispers, eyes watching Meredith exit the room again. “You did good babe, you never have to see him again.”

Jo nods, but can’t stop the trail of tears flooding her cheeks. She thinks that maybe she’s crying in relief, her body finally coming to terms with the fact that this is well and truly over. 

It’s over. 

Almost ten years on, Jo finally feels the relief and comfort of writing Paul out of her life. Her mind flashes briefly to the night she’d finally left, the fear that still gripped her heart as she made the decision to walk away and never look back. She wishes desperately that she could tell that girl, scared and alone and bruised Brooke, that things would be okay. That she’d find a man who loved her, who cared about her and gave her the stability she’d been deprived of for so long. 

She knows she’ll never be able to turn back time and console herself, but Jo takes a small amount of comfort in the fact that the little life resting in her womb will never have to worry or fear like she had for so long.

[amelinkshepherd]

Can you pls write a prompt where Amelia goes back to work after having the baby? Plsssasss

Hey! I really enojoyed writing this, I hope you enjoy it too!

-x-

To say she was tired was a huge understatement. She was sleep deprived, hadn’t had a meal that didn’t come out of a box for two weeks and her boobs hurt. She also knew she wasn’t supposed to be back to work yet, but it was Dr. Webber. And if there was one thing she was determined to do was find out what was wrong with him. They had ruled out alzhimers and dementia but after his last episode Bailey had decided they would run a new set of neurological exams and MRI scans to see if anything new would appear, and help them finally pinpoint exactly what was wrong with him. Which was why she sneaked back into the hospital before her maternity leave was over.

“Shepherd?” Bailey asked when she spotted the neurosurgeon right outside Dr. Webber’s room, with a two week old baby in her arms.

She turned around to find Bailey walking towards her, her face clearly surprised to see her back so soon, “What are you doing here? You’re on maternity leave”

“I talked to Maggie and she told me you were running another MRI and an EEG” Amelia started to softly bounce the baby up and down when he began to fuss.

“And we’ll have Koracik check them out in case something comes up, you did not have to come. You just had a baby and you should be at home. Resting.”

“I’m fine Bailey, I have to be here. I’ve seen his previous scans, I’ve been on this case since the beginning. I should be the one running these ones..” Amelia argued and Bailey just sighed.

“I won’t convince you to go back home, will I?”

“Not really.”

“Okay, then let’s go” Bailey sighed as she made her way inside Richard’s room.

“I’ll be right in” Amelia smiled as she tried to decide whether or not to take Scout with her, thinking it probably wasn’t the best idea she turned around desperately, hoping to find a familiar face. She saw Helm out of the corner of her eyes in the nurses station. “Helm”

The intern looked up to find Dr. Shepherd standing right outside Dr. Webber’s room, “Yes, Dr. Shepherd?”

“Come here” Amelia ordered and just as the intern approached her she continued “We need to take Dr.Webber up to CT”

“Okay, I’ll get him ready” Helm smiled, to be honest she was surprised they had chosen her out of all the interns to help in this case. Especially since the only ones working on it where either attendings or fellows, not even residents.

“No, no. We’ll be taking him up to CT” Amelia motioned towards herself and the rest of the doctors within the room, “I need you to take him” she eyed the baby in her arms who had his eyes wide open and was looking around.

“What?” Helm looked utterly surprised at the sudden turn of events.

“I need you to take the baby Helm, it’s going to be fine, anything you might need is in the diaper bag” Amelia ever so gently passed the baby into Helm’s arms, “Okay, here we go. Mommy will be right back” She cooed.

“But Dr. Shepherd-”

“See this as practice for neonatal care” Amelia offered the scared intern a smile, “If he gets hungry there’s a bottle in the diaper bag, I’ll be back as soon as I can Helm, you’ve got this” And with that Amelia left, leaving Helm standing in front of the nurses station with a newborn, a stroller, a diaper bag and no idea what to do.

Which was why she spent the next hour aimlessly walking around the cafeteria and the lobby, she tried to put the baby in the stroller but she opted otherwise when she couldn’t quite strap him in and he started to cry. So she left the stroller in the interns break room and she continued to walk around the hospital. And she was pissed, a combination that this was what she was assigned to do instead of a surgery and the fact that she wasn’t a baby person, something she was sure the baby felt because try as she might she couldn’t get him to fall asleep or stop crying for longer than 5 minutes.

“So you’re on babysitting duty?” She turned around to find Levi walking towards her, “What happened to: I’m putting my foot down today and I’ll get into a surgery Levi, you’ll see. I don’t need to be roommates with an attending to get into surgery. I have talent to stand on” He added giving her a mocking smirk.

“Shut up” She grunted, “What was I supposed to tell Dr. Shepherd huh?” Helm questioned her best friend, “You would’ve done the same thing” She let out a frustrated sigh when the baby began to cry. Again. “But he won’t stop crying.”

“Maybe he doesn’t like you, that’s why he’s crying”

“Seriously shut up, the only reason he’s crying is because you’re annoying him”

Before Levi could offer her a witty comeback they both saw Jo walking towards them, “Can you tell me why the hell you have a newborn on a surgical floor?”

However, when the brunette got closer she recognized her crying godson in the interns arms. “Wait, is that Scout? Why do you have him? Is everything okay?” Jo began to panic as a million scenarios ran through her head.

“Dr. Shepherd came in to run some tests on Dr. Webber and she asked me to take care of him,” Helm explained as the infant continued to cry in her arms.

“Hand him over Helm.” Jo reached over to take the little boy and as soon as he was in her arms the crying ceased. “There we go,” Jo cooed.

“See? I told you he didn’t like you” Levi whispered to Helm, and she rolled her eyes.

“I’ll take care of him now” Jo reached over for the diaper bag, “Is this everything?”

“I left the stroller in the interns room.”

“Bring it over to the attendings lounge, please” Jo ordered “And after check on my post-ops and let me know if anything comes up” She added a little too distracted by the baby in her arms. Helm nodded whilst Jo turned around and walked away, leaving a very grateful to not be on babysitting duty Helm behind.

Link made his way into the hospital lobby; unshaved and tired. How he had managed to drive all the way to the hospital was a miracle because he was sure he hadn’t slept more than six hours in the past four days. Before he could decide where to start looking for his girlfriend and baby he heard Owen talking to him.

“Link? What are you doing here?”

“Have you seen Amelia and the baby?”

“Wait. Amelia’s here?” Owen asked, surprised. Just as Amelia walked out of the elevator followed by Maggie and Meredith.

“Amelia” Link called out when he spotted her.

“Crap, I meant to text you, I’m sorry”

“I woke up to nothing and nobody. What are you doing here? Where’s Scout?” Link questioned as he stepped closer to her.

“He’s with Helm, I have to go check on Richard. I’m sorry, I’ll be back as soon as I can. I love you”

“Leave me a note next time” Link sighed, before he turned around to look at Owen, “She’s not going to leave me a note is she?”

“I highly doubt it” Owen chuckled, “You look like hell though”

“Yeah”

“You know you’re in a building full of beds right?”

“I just need to go lie down for a minute” Link yawned before he walked away, making his way to either an on-call room or the lounge room, whichever he found first. That’s why when he finally made it to the attendings lounge he found Jo sitting on the couch cooing happily at his son in her arms.

“Hey, he’s with you. Amelia said he was with Helm” He walked over to them, sitting right next to Jo. Placing a hand on the baby’s leg and giving it a gentle squeeze.

“Yeah, I ran into her and she looked like she was about to have a mental breakdown, so I took him” Jo explained, “Besides he’s so much happier with Aunt Jo aren’t you?” She cooed and both of them smiled when the baby gurgled as if to answer her.

“Do you want to hold him?” She motioned to the baby to see if Link wanted to hold him.

“No, knock yourself out” He shook his head, “I’m just going to close my eyes for a second”

“You should take a shower, because not only do you look terrible you smell terrible too.” Jo chuckled.

“Yeah? Well be thankful I’m not covered in spit up, and umh…” He yawned again “Just umh..mhm”

Jo laughed when she turned around and saw him already asleep, “See, I think you broke your dad Scout”.

[twentiethcenturymoviesandtv]

12 Angry Men: The Characters

While 12 Angry Men has a remarkably small cast for a motion picture, the problem is that twelve of the cast members happen to be main characters.

Twelve is a large number of main characters to balance out, especially when you only see them over the course of one day, in only one setting.  The writers had the challenging job of making each character unique enough that the audience doesn’t mix them up, and while some of them are more distinct than others, each character is different enough so that the viewers can tell them apart.

As a result, 12 Angry Men is left with a surprisingly large main cast, full of characters that are neither infallible heroes, nor despicable villains.  Much like Casablanca, it would seem like this film has an issue deciding a protagonist, as the character who would seem to fulfill this role, Henry Fonda’s Juror #8, doesn’t have a ‘problem pertaining to the plot’ that’s unique from any of the other characters.  They all have the same problem: they need to come up with a verdict.  And indeed, this film would seem to be without a true protagonist if not for another element: the protagonist’s reaction towards the problem.

You see, while every other character begins the story either certain of the boy’s guilt, or just wanting to say they are so that the jury ordeal can be over with, it is only Juror #8 who believes that the case deserves a closer examination.  

As you may have guessed, today, we’re going to be examining the characters of 12 Angry Men, starting with our protagonist: Juror #8.  Let’s take a  look.  (Spoilers below!)

Juror #8 is a rather interesting protagonist in that, as I mentioned in previous articles, he could be any one of us.  He’s the ‘hero’ of the story, not because of any great feat, but because he was logical and thoughtful enough to take his job as a juror seriously enough to put real thought into the case at hand.  This is not a story about a man who is certain of his correctness, this is a story about a man who is uncertain about someone’s guilt, and there is a huge difference.  From the moment of his Establishing Character Moment of quiet reflection at the window, he’s in action to make sure that he, and the rest of the jury, comes to a fair, if not right, conclusion.  

Juror #8 never claims he is right, merely that he has reasonable doubt that leads him to believe that he might be right.  He wants to talk about the verdict, he wants to be careful, because a life is on the line.  He takes his responsibility seriously, and that, at first, is what sets him up as our protagonist.  It is his vote of ‘not guilty’ that gets the plot going proper, for without him, the film would have come to a whopping, depressing, ten minutes tops.

So, we know Juror #8 is responsible, and tries to be moral.  What else do we know about him?

For one thing, he’s sharp.

Juror #8 knows that he can’t convince anyone to change their vote without some good evidence, which he brings and addresses.  Bit by bit, he chips away the certainty around the testimonies, alibis, and evidence, bringing up arguments and doubts about the elements of the case that the other jurors are absolutely certain about.  He’s quick to figure out people’s angles and point out flaws in logic, and he’s not afraid to call out someone’s bias.  His exchange with Juror #3 proves this, as Juror #8 accuses him (rightfully so) of wanting to kill the defendant due to personal reasons.

Juror #8 is a Guile Hero, using his wits and brains to pick apart the evidence, the original Rogue Juror archetype, wanting to take his time to get through the facts.  He cares about getting to the bottom of the facts, and he wants to get the other jurors on the side of justice as well.

Wait a minute, you say.  I’ll buy that he’s the ‘hero’, but protagonists are supposed to change by the end of the story.  There’s no sign of that at all!

Honestly, you’re right.

Juror #8, while clearly being the ‘hero’ of the film never seems to ‘change’ by the end of the film.  In fact, he is the only character not to change, in vote as well as action.  So what are we to make of that?

If the rest of the cast were as immovable as Juror #8, I would agree that his ‘protagonist’ status would certainly be called into question, and we may indeed be left with a protagonist-less film, however, there is one element that prevents that from happening: the fact that the other jurors do change their minds.

He’s the grounding element for the audience, courageous and standing for human decency.  The point of his character is that he’s unyielding, unchanging in the face of peer pressure.  It is in his influence, his changing of the other characters, that his test as a protagonist comes.

Of course, he succeeds, but the road is difficult.  The first ally rallied to his cause, after a few minutes of deliberation, is Juror #9.

Juror #9 (Joseph Sweeney) is an observant Cool Old Guy, the Lancer to Juror #8.  His abilities in Awesomeness by Analysis play a huge part in convincing the remaining jurors to change their votes, by standing with Juror #8 against the pressure and displaying a great deal of insight and sympathy.  He’s also possessing of some pretty progressive ideas, not being bigoted like some of the younger jurors around him.  While needing some thought before changing his vote, Juror #9 is not afraid to speak his mind and morality, making him a valuable ally in changing the course of the vote.

Leading us to the next vote change: Juror #5.

Juror #5 (Jack Klugman) has a bit in common with the defendant, coming from a similar background.  He also grew up in the slums, and takes it quite personally that some of the jurors think that that’s suitable explanation for murder.  He’s an invaluable addition, as it is his experience witnessing knife-fights that leads to the debunking of the grip necessary for the boy to have murdered his father.  He’s a Nice Guy from a rough neighborhood, and ends up producing some key points in favor of the Not Guilty verdict.

Next to switch his vote is Juror #11 (George Voskovec), a man with Immigrant Patriotism, faith in the American dream of democracy and justice.  The ‘Token Minority’ of the twelve, Juror #11 begins thinking of, and asking his own questions that can’t be satisfyingly answered with the evidence given.  He’s a polite man, with a great concern with being fair and upright.  In fact, it is one of his lines that best sums up the point of the film:

“We have a responsibility. This is a remarkable thing about democracy. That we are … what is the word? … Ah, notified! That we are notified by mail to come down to this place and decide on the guilt or innocence of a man we have not known before. We have nothing to gain or lose by our verdict. This is one of the reasons why we are strong. We should not make it a personal thing.”

He is here to remind us of the seriousness of jury duty, the importance of justice and fairness.  His character warns us not to take our privileges for granted, something that we need to be reminded of.  He is strong-minded, of strong character, and strong-willed

Leading us to the next switch in votes: Juror #2.

Juror #2 (John Fielder) is a timid man who doesn’t seem to have much of a backbone at first.  He’s an Extreme Doormat, unable to really explain his opinions, tending to go along with the tide at first.  As the film progresses, he does grow more of a spine, later evidenced by bringing up the question of the stab wound, which had been bothering him.  Had he been more timid, there’s a possibility that the vote might have swapped once more, and Juror #8’s cause would be lost.

Then there’s Juror #6 (Edward Binns).

Juror #6 doesn’t have a whole lot of personality, admittedly.  He doesn’t have a lot of dialogue, but he is fair minded, willing to change his mind if proven wrong.  His chief moment of character is standing up to Juror #3’s interrupting of Juror #9, telling him that he ought to have more respect for his elders.  In the end, Juror #6’s character is the switching point, announcing the stalemate, 6 to 6 for a vote.

The balance is changed again by Juror #7 (Jack Warden).

Juror #7 is a self-absorbed person, whose chief concern in the film is the baseball tickets ‘burning a hole’ in his pocket.  There’s a game he wants to get to, and his chief concern is voting whichever way that will get him out the fastest.  He pretends to be offended when his motives are questioned, but it’s clear that he’s just concerned with leaving.  Unfortunately, his is the attitude we can most easily see happening in ourselves with the same task, distracted with Skewed Priorities and too busy being a Deadpan Snarker to put forth the effort our legal system deserves.

The next vote for Not Guilty goes to Juror #12 (Robert Webber), a Charmer and a Ditherer, almost as easily swayed as Juror #2.  He works in an advertising agency, and spends most of the proceedings doodling or playing tic-tac-toe with the other jurors, too busy to pay attention.  He approaches jury much like a board meeting, and as a result, his opinions aren’t all that substantial.  All the same, he does become the eighth to side with Juror #8, further cementing the majority.

Following him is Juror #1, (Martin Balsam) the Foreman, a reasonable man who just wants this organized.  He’s a football coach, a soft-spoken Reasonable Authority Figure who is willing to take charge and keep everyone in order.  He’s always trying to reign things in and keep them under control, a vital element to the powder-keg that is the remainder of the jury.

Especially the next vote change: Juror #10 (Ed Begley).

One of the closest things this film has to an antagonist, the constantly coughing, Politically Incorrect Villain Juror #10 doesn’t need any evidence.  To him, the boy’s background is enough.  He’s a bitter, bigoted, racist Hate Sink, convinced begrudgingly to change his vote after his Villianous Breakdown rant, defeated by the lack of support from his peers.  

One of the final holdouts, though not a villain, is Juror #4 (E.G. Marshall), another Reasonable Authority Figure and an Implacable Man.  He is very logical and reasonable, holding out on changing his vote not out of malice, but of genuine concern for the facts.  Wearing a set of Stoic Spectacles (Smart People Wear Glasses, after all), Juror #4 serves as a Hero Antagonist version of The Spock, countering with good arguments and valid questions.  In the end, after his own reasons are shaken, Juror #4 graciously admits this and changes his vote, leaving us with the other closest thing this film has to an antagonist: Juror #3.

Juror #3 (Lee J. Cobb) is a bitter Big Bad with a Hair Trigger Temper, the Evil Counterpart to Juror #8.  In a case of Believing Your Own Lies, Juror #3 is convinced he is impartial, the chief advocate for the death penalty of the group without realizing he is projecting his bad relationship with his son onto the case.  He, too, switches his vote after a Villainous Breakdown, and Paper Destruction of Anger, but it is important to note that this is a Villainy-Free Villain, a Tragic Villain.

Juror #3 believes his opinion is firmly rooted in the facts, but it becomes very clear as the film progresses that he doesn’t really have as good a leg to stand on as he seems to think.  His anger at the defendant is anger at his son, anger at all sons who ‘disrespect’ their fathers.  He is unable to get his way in his family, and in the jury, and the result causes his bluster, and his inevitable downfall.  In the end, after a Heel Realization, he changes his vote, the final Not Guilty.

As with all the characters, we don’t know if he changed his mind or his ways.  For all we know, these men lived the rest of their lives untouched by the events in the jury room on the hottest day of the year, and honestly, that’s not a huge surprise.

These men, while not sharing the same backgrounds as many of us, are meant to be us.  We are given a responsibility, a privilege to affect the decisions in our system of justice.  We are meant to use it, to take advantage of it, and as a result, we are visible in these men.  Whether we’re crusaders for justice, impatient and dismissive, bitter and resentful, or simply taking it for granted, these twelve angry men are us, the audience.  It is up to us who we try to emulate, what values we hold dear, and how clearly we view them.

It is the ambiguity and the sheer brutal honesty in which these characters are depicted that this film’s legacy is made.  Twelve men without names (aside from two in the epilogue) all too real to be comfortable for American audiences.  This is, if not a realistic film, a real film, a mirror held to ourselves and our views on the systems we live with.  It’s up to us to decide what we do once we catch a glimpse of the reflection.

Thank you guys so much for reading!  Don’t forget that the ask box is always open for questions, suggestions, discussions, or just saying hi.  I hope to see you all in the next article.

[storiesforallfandoms]

advice ~ daniel webber

word count: 2323

request?: yes!

@kellysimagines​ “Can you make a Daniel Webber one where he is working with Daniel Radcliffe on his new movie, and I really want to meet him and Daniel takes me on set so I meet him, and he gives me advice how to become an actress and Daniel is jealous of how close we are and that I constantly visit the set but hang out more with Daniel then him and at home he is cutting me off and stuff and later he confronts me and I laugh at him and explain why I spend alot of time wit him and we make up? :)”

description: when your boyfriend introduces you to his co-star, he starts to get jealous with how much time you two are spending together, but little does he know you’re just getting some acting tips

pairing: daniel webber x female!reader

warnings: swearing

masterlist

also, i know two daniels is gonna be super confusing so just a note: daniel webber = daniel, daniel radcliffe = dan

I squeezed Daniel’s hand as he led me onto the set of his new movie. I was nearly bouncing with excitement, like a child getting to go to the sweets store of an ice cream parlor or something.

Daniel’s most recent movie had him starring alongside Daniel Radcliffe, aka Harry Potter himself. I was a massive Harry Potter fan ever since I was young. The Philosopher’s Stone was the first movie I had ever seen and ever since then I had been hooked. Daniel knew this, and when he got casted for the role with Dan, I practically begged him to bring me to set at least once. He told me he would’ve brought me anyways, but I had a feeling it was mainly to appease my begging.

“If you squeeze my hand any harder I won’t have feeling in it anymore,” he teased, trying to wiggle his hand from my grasp.

I loosened my grip on his hand. “I’m sorry, babe. I’m just excited! I can’t believe I’m actually meeting the Daniel Radcliffe!”

Daniel chuckled and wrapped an arm around me, kissing the top of my head as he did so. “Believe it, baby. He’s in his trailer right now, he should be coming to set soon.”

As if on cue, someone called for Daniel and along came Daniel Radcliffe. I grabbed Daniel’s hand again, my eyes widening in shock and excitement. Daniel winced as I squeezed his hand a little too hard yet again. My heart was beating so fast with excitement that I was sure I was going to pass out. I really hoped I wouldn’t, that’d be the worst first impression on my childhood hero.

He smiled at the two of us and I felt so lightheaded with excitement. I had to stop myself from jumping up and down like an excited child. “Hey! You must be (Y/N). Daniel talks about you all the time.”

I looked at Daniel in surprise and he just smiled back at me. I managed to unlatch my hand from his and extend it to Dan, like a normal person does.

“Yeah, yeah that’s me. It’s so nice to meet you, too,” I said, shaking his hand.

“She’s a massive fan,” Daniel told him, earning a slight hit on his arm from me. Dan just laughed. “She’s an actress, too.”

“I wouldn't call myself an actress yet,” I shrugged. “I’m trying to become one, but the most I’ve done is some background work and I had one line in a Netflix show recently.”

Dan nodded. “Yeah, breaking into the business isn’t all that easy, which I know means nothing coming from someone who starred in a huge franchise at the age of 10.”

I opened my mouth to respond, but at that moment Daniel was whisked away to get into his wardrobe and to get hair and makeup done. Suddenly, with him no longer by my side, all the confidence I had to talk to Dan was gone as well. The words I was about to say fizzled out in my throat and I just stood there with an open mouth, like an idiot.

I clamped my mouth shut finally, but tried to rack my brain for something to say.

“So,” Dan said instead, sending relief through me, “just having trouble getting your foot in the door with roles?”

I sighed heavily and nodded. “I’ve had plenty of auditions for all sorts of roles, but they all end the same; they tell me I’m fantastic but I’m just not who they’re looking for. I’m starting to think I’m not even a good actress, they just don’t want to tell me the truth.”

“I’m sure you’re a fantastic actress. The sad reality, especially these days, is just that casting directors want more well known faces to lead their movies in order to sell more tickets and to get a better box office rating, even if well known faces aren’t the best option,” Dan said. “You should show me some of your acting, like audition videos if you have them, or you can do a scene by memory, while we wait. We have some time while Daniel gets ready.”

I felt dizzy with excitement yet again. Daniel Radcliffe was asking to see my acting?! How could I pass this up?!

The two of us sat together on some nearby chairs and I showed Dan the audition video from my last audition. I still had it on my phone to try and see what I couldn’t possibly done wrong for the casting directors to pass up on me, but every time I watched it I couldn’t see a problem. They seemed genuinely impressed with my skills, and had even told me that time around that they’d “get in touch” with my agent.

They stayed true to their word, but they got in touch to tell my agent that they had casted someone else, not me.

Dan told me he thought my acting was great, which caused me to nearly jump around like a child yet again, and assured me that he thought I would be casted in a lead role soon enough.

“Hollywood has so many known faces, casting directors need to focus on the up and coming people instead. You just have to find the right casting director who thinks that,” he told me.

I smiled brightly at him. “I appreciate that, and I appreciate you looking at my acting.”

“It was no problem! You’re insanely talented, and really nice. I can see why Daniel likes you so much.”

I smiled. Over Dan’s shoulder, I could see Daniel standing with someone while watching the two of us. I waved excitedly to him, causing Dan to look over. Daniel smiled back, but it wasn’t one of his wide, bright smiles, and he didn’t wave either. It seemed odd, but I figured maybe it was because of something being said to him with whoever he was stood with.

“Looks like Daniel’s ready to go,” Dan said. “I better get going to start the scene. I’ll talk to you after, yeah?”

“Yeah! Sounds good.”

~~~~~~

As the weeks went on, I continued to go to set with Daniel to talk with Dan. In between takes, he would give me advice on acting, and on how to really put myself out there and make myself stand out to casting directors despite not being a big named actress.

I was grateful for his help, and looked forward to the days where I could go to set with Daniel to talk to Dan. However, those days started to become few and far between as Daniel began to grow distant.

It started with slight silence at the end of every day. We’d drive home from set every night in complete silence. I’d try to ask Daniel about the day on set and how he found the movie was coming along, but his answers were always short and he never asked anything in return, so I let it go. Then, my visits to the set slowly came to an end when Daniel would get up and leave before waking me, leaving me home alone for the day, and rarely answering my calls throughout the day.

I knew he was acting off, and I wanted to bring it up, but I wasn’t sure how to. I didn’t want to seem like a prying girlfriend, but it was obvious Daniel was mad with me about something, something I wasn’t even sure of.

After yet another day where he went to set without me, Daniel came home earlier than normal. I was sat in our living room watching TV, and I got up to greet him when I heard the door open. He had the same, expressionless look on his face that he always had lately.

“Hey,” I said. “You’re home early.”

“We finished filming early,” he responded. “We might be finished this movie sooner than anyone thought. They’re thinking we could be wrapped within the next few days.”

I nodded, although wasn’t sure how to respond. I was hoping to get to go back to set to see Dan a few more times before they wrapped, but judging by Daniel’s current attitude, that probably wouldn’t be happening.

“Daniel was asking about you,” he said as he moved past me, just inches away from bumping my shoulder as he did so. He had a bitter tone to his voice

I glared after him, wondering what his problem was. “Yeah? What was he asking?”

“Where you were, and why you weren’t coming to set with me anymore. He said he missed seeing you around.”

“I was starting to wonder the same thing,” I said, following Daniel to our shared bedroom. “Is there a reason you stopped taking me to set with you? If you were asked to stop, you can tell me, I won’t be upset, but you just stopped even waking me to go to set with you anymore.”

“I bet you’re really upset that you can’t see Daniel then, huh?” His voice was like ice, but the accusing tone of his voice sent a fiery rage through me.

I couldn’t help but laugh. “Really, Daniel? That’s what this is all about? The fact that I spend time on set with Dan? We’ve invited you to join us on multiple occasions, and you always turn us down!”

“I shouldn’t have to be invited to spend time with my girlfriend, (Y/N)! Not when she’s spending all of her time with another guy! How do you think it makes me feel to see you two all over each other right in front of me?”

I scoffed and rolled my eyes. “We sit next to each other and talk, that’s hardly being all over one another. I can’t believe you don’t trust me enough to let me have a male friend! A guy who, by the way, is also in a relationship and has been for like seven years! If you actually took us up on the offers, or if you just came over and sat with us sometime, you’d know that all that's happening is that Dan is giving me acting advice so I can finally get a role.”

Daniel turned to look at me, his face less angry and more shocked. I didn’t let him get a word in, quickly adding, “But no, you avoided me, gave me the silent treatment, and intentionally stopped bringing me to set so that I wouldn’t see him anymore, instead of talking to me about this like a normal person. I thought we had a stronger relationship than this, Daniel, but I guess I was wrong.”

I grabbed my purse from the bedroom floor and made my way to the front door. I didn’t know where I was going, but I wanted to get out of the house. I was so frustrated and angry that I couldn’t even stand to look at Daniel. How dare he accuse me of cheating on him?! He knew I loved him more than anything, that I’d never do that to him, but apparently that wasn’t enough to convince him that I was just friends with Dan.

I heard him running after me, and his hand grab my arm just before I reached for the door. I tried to pull away, but he tightened his grip.

“Let me go,” I said, trying to pull my arm free again.

“Not unless you promise not to leave when I do.” I sighed and nodded. He let my arm go and I crossed my arms. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions like that.”

“You really shouldn’t have,” I retorted. “Daniel, you know I love you more than anything, I’d never throw that away for a guy I just met, even if he’s the star of my favourite film franchise. Do you know how much it hurts that you’re accusing me of cheating on you with Dan?”

“I know, I know,” he sighed, running his hands through his hair. “It was beyond stupid of me to think that, and even more so to just act out without asking. You were just so close with him on set, and it seemed like the only reason you ever wanted to go was to see him. I just...I felt jealous...I’m so sorry baby, please forgive me.”

I took a deep breath, allowing myself to calm down a moment before I spoke. “I can forgive you, Daniel. But you have to promise to talk to me when you’re worried about stuff like this in the future and not just give me the cold shoulder. It sucked feeling like I couldn’t talk to you about anything because you never really talked back. You just ignored me.”

Daniel nodded and wrapped his arms around me. “I promise, babe, I’ll talk to you about any concerns I have in the future. I’m so sorry.”

I hugged him back, burying my head in his chest. “I forgive you. And I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

I pulled away and leaned up to kiss Daniel. He cupped my face gently and held me to him.

“Now that you’re talking to me again,” I said, breaking away from the kiss. “I’ve been trying to tell you that I had an audition last week and they cast me in a reoccurring role in a new Netflix show in development.”

“What?!” Daniel exclaimed, his face lighting up with excitement. “Babe! Holy shit, that’s amazing!”

I giggled as he kissed me again. “It is. I’m very excited. They’re supposed to finish casting this week and send us our scripts shortly after. Filming starts in about two months.”

Daniel hugged me tightly. I smiled and melted into him, happy that our short, sort of fight was over.

“Let’s go celebrate,” he said. “We’ll get food, whatever you want, on me.”

“Now you’re speaking my language,” I said.