#but was like. fine with it ? i cant recall the details but yeah it was Interesting

[watatsumiis]

[🍓 anon]

first of all thank you so much for the in depth reply!! after reading your elaboration i actually think we're at least on very similar pages about her character, just approaching it from different directions! if you would be so gracious as to entertain a (hopefully brief edit: it was not brief) blorbo ramble about why i simultaneously near-completely agree with you and also love her so much:

so, in response to the following, bc this is something i agree pretty strongly with:

I think some of the ways this game handles really heavy topics seems to be almost... dismissive, at times. I understand that it's a game that's supposed to be marketed towards a broad audience and there are some concessions that need to be made to keep a smooth gameplay experience. This isn't a knock at the writers at all, just an observation. These huge events seem to happen in canon story and they seem to be dropped soon after apart from a few hints and side mentions, and I wish it was explored more?

basically, just... yeah. this whole paragraph. i have a friend that really hated the inazuma arc because of generational trauma they have with dictatorships and revolution, and how cheaply and shallowly Genshin seemed to present and then drop it, almost as if its goal was just to present opportunities to sell watered down "revolution flavored" characters (sorry if that sounds harsh, i don't mean to say it's bad or wrong, it's mostly just how the writing hit me-- the characters are really rich and full of personality as always, but it feels like the consequences of the labels they were assigned were...glossed over/forgotten about at best, and purposefully ignored and "woobified" at worst).

like the writers repeatedly bring up really really serious consequences, like how taking someone's vision seems to have extremely serious impacts on their mental health, almost akin to taking their entire motivation for life or a part of their soul (a different friend called it "inventing new war crimes"). or like how the whole of watatsumi island is unable to grow food or trade, so for them this war is a matter of survival and for Inazuma City it's a matter of....what, pride? there's no real driving force and there's a huuuuge disconnect between E!'s actual aspirations and what she's actually doing to her people because of it.

(there are other issues i have with the genshin worldbuilding in general too like.... i mean obviously there's a lot to complain about in sumeru, but also the quest with Dainsleif in the chasm was really upsetting for multiple of my friends as well)

so i guess my love for E! as a blorbo in spite of all this comes down to three main points:

1) i am immune to bad worldbuilding. i can see it just enough to acknowledge and deinternalize, but i mostly focus on smashing interpersonal relationships, feelings, personalities, and other character traits like aspirations and needs.

2) E! has a personality that i relate to a lot, and crucially, i don't see her as like, "just some sweet girl that missed her sister and didn't know what she was doing uwu"; my love for her is specifically the love that i dole out to my reformed villain blorbos. i love her as someone who fucked up HUGE time while she was in a bad place, got literally slapped/kicked/sworded back into facing reality, SAW what she'd done and went oh. shit. no more. no more of this. and she clearly doesn't quite get what she did wrong at first, beyond "people are telling me that my people are miserable-- is this truly an eternity worth preserving? i will consider and evaluate this feedback strategically and autistically and see if i can do better" and then like. she stews on it for a while, realizes she was wrong, and ends up literally in a battle to the death with a manifestation of her former ideals because she wants to do good and she wants to change and do something for her people for once. (the for once is the important part because she did not do anything good before that.) and it's not a lot and it can't ever possibly make up for the horrors she inflicted on her people up until now, but it means a lot to me personally to see someone do horrific things and then go "you know what this sucks. im in control of my own life and im going to choose kindness from here on out. it won't fix anything. but i can at least stop future suffering"

(i think it would really be fantastic if the canon gave us some more npcs that hate her or like otherwise blame her for ANYTHING because it seems like everyone in inazuma still blindly loves her?? not a huge fan of that, but it's pretty easy to picture a fanon where that's true)

... and finally 3) is basically just that I'm biased. she's got my mental illnesses so i went from drawing her with ... a very mean caption, at the start of the questline before I'd met her, to the same drawing with the caption scratched out, saying instead "nevermind i need her to be in the washer high spin for 100 hrs" to just loving her fully after her second quest because in my fanon projection version of her, the drive to change and understand her people better is the repentance and regret for me, because that's the most constructive form that regret can take-- though i would still have liked, y'know, a formal apology or something, but. yeah that's what fanon is for

(also, about her voicelines, some of them are not actually her but the Raiden Shogun, I'm not sure which of those her voiceline about Kokomi is (it very well may have been hers), so that's also very valid, my response to that is. basically just fanon again because it feels to me like the kind of thing that she'd change her mind about after her second story quest)

ok sorry for the huge wall of text but thank you for indulging my blorbo rant!!! i don't think anything in here is too harsh but if it is feel free to call me out on that, cause i tend to get a little Passionate about my character essays but i don't mean it in like, an "any opinion but this one sucks" way or anything!!

This has been sitting in my inbox for a hot minute awaiting a response that I just don't really have the spoons to give, but I really really enjoyed reading your take on this character and all the reasons why you like her, and I felt like it deserved to see the light of day because it's so well thought out and interesting!

[your-local-uwu-artist]

Wha- what’s the pollypocket shoe incident?

oh boy, well i could give the short version but thats less fun soo

alright i guess ill start by saying that i was VERY young, young enough that if we went by the age rating put on the box, i wasn't supposed to be playing with small toys like polly pockets. but i had always loved miniatures, it would have been very out of character for me to attempt to eat any small pieces, so this wasn't a concern

so i was playing with polly pockets on my parent's bed, no clue why i was on my parents bed, but i distinctly remember that part, also worth noting that i was alone. And lastly factor number 3 is that i had a really runny nose

that last part's important because at some point: i sneezed and it was all downhill from there

so some snot got on the little pollypocket shoe i was holding, and uh

you know how when you watercolor and tilting the paper you can see the watery parts reflect in the light- it makes a little shiny effect. and snot's liquid, so it well, also made a little shiny effect, so the once sorta rubbery textured shoe was now a sorta shiny sorta rubbery textured show

(to little-me's credit it wasn't like, thick green snot, there was just a lot of it sense i didn't know how to blow my nose. it was just enough that i noticed the reflective property of it)

and my little toddler brain was fucking hyped bout' this, and i guess my thought process was along of the lines of "snot made shoe shiny" "snot comes from nose" and "shoe small enough to fit in nose" "shoe in nose= shoe SHINY :DDDD"

so naturally i started sticking pollypocket shoes up my nose,

and it was fine! (at first)

i want to make it clear that this wasn't like, a toddler agressively shoving plastic up their naval cavity: i was being so very careful, just- really delicately and gently dipping polly pocket shoes up my nose

little me though this was a wonderful discovery, certainly a small detail i mentioned in an earlier paragraph won't become relevant, certainly this is a flawless plan and ah would you look at that theres a miniscule shoe stuck up my nose now wow who could've guessed :(

and so obviously once i told my mom she instructed me to blow my nose, as it isn't far up and should be easy to get out

...so uhhhh fun fact at this time in my life if i was instructed to blow out into a tissue i would proceed to blow in very hard and audibly.

"blow your nose"

*loudly sucks in*

"no like blow your nose OUT"

*loudly sucks in nose even harder*

...so yeah this actually made things a lot worse

we ending up having to go to the emergency room, Little-me was pleasantly surprised that we did get the polly pocket shoe back: i wrote an unnecessarily long anecdote bout' the incident for school at some point: to this day me and my mom cant agree/remember if the shoe was purple or pink, but we both recall it being a high-heel sandal

[mauricemylittlemeowmeow]

gmorning gmorning. gmorning long post.

it's exactly 4am!!

blurry ass shot but i woke up, saw jupiter and thought "yeah definitely too early". but then i get up a bit more and i saw the moon right below it and i thought pretty!!!

skies've been too cloudy to stargaze for the past month. it's actually completely obscured the moon and jupiter right now so i'm glad i could get a shot in even though it was shitty lmao. it was real pretty and nice and fuckin mars was there with aldebaran and everything (if u squint u see them in the photo above jupiter)

dream time!!! on a scale of 10, dreams were a 7-8 today depending on which. one of them featured daniil which was funny so ill relay it:

premise was that i was the player character in what my brain helpfully supplied as some sort prequel game for patho. a nurse (i was talking to my nurse friend before sleeping and she was ranting abt phlebotomy or smth so lmao)

it mightve been set in a plague but basically there was some sort of epidemic and "i" tended to the in patients at an hospital (is it a hospital?? do people pronounce the h in hospital in english?) where most of everyone was sick with something really bad and barely curable.

anyways i was walking around doing my rounds. then i come over to this room with patients and it's literally like a closet with long shelves and everything but instead of supplies, the patients were crammed in there like a morgue or a line of standing coffins.

lo and behold i see daniil in all his p1 model glory. i pull him out. hes distressed so i tell him hes actually starting to get better (he was not) and that soon he'll be discharged after he's well again. i pat his head lovably and grow fond like i was comforting a cute puppy (i have 6 dogs) and i think about shoving him in the broom closet of doom again.

i think that was the part where i was like "lmao wtf is this dream rn" so my brain helpfully supplied some lore then when i was done "remembering" the setting above, the scene already shifted.

daniil was, once again, in distress. he was a lot like an asylum patient. like someone who lost their sense of self and was struggling very hard to claw at an identity of any sort that they might have had in the past. he was trying to use the phone to make a call. he struggles trying to recall a number but then eventually gets one right.

it rings and bc dream me really wanted to listen in on the conversation like a chronic gossip, i manage to "convince" him (dream coercion) to let me answer the phone.

it was his mum!! daniil dankovsky's mother 大草 lmao. i told her i was from the hospital, calling about daniil and she was like "oh... he's dead, isn't he?" and i told her that no he's fine actually and was to be dismissed very soon (i was lying).

while this was happening, i was trying my best to let daniil hear the conversation too but i didn't know how to put the telephone on speaker (bc fr idk how to put telephones on speaker irl. i think our telephone company doesnt provide speaker buttons????? idk im going insane) so i was just struggling, trying to put the receiver speaker in between us before giving up

i heard the tail end of her going on about needing "dr. burakh" to fix her up and my brain hit me with another dose of setting details at that point.

(artemy's a doctor/surgeon in the hospital and hes handling daniil's treatment too)

i laugh and tell her that there's no need to get artemy bc soon her son'll be home to fix her up instead.

at that point, i was urged to cut the call because someone came up to me, another telephone in hand, and said "you know this is a home line right?" (implying anyone could listen in)

i was too lazy to reply and continue the dream so i just woke up after that lol.

but yeah good morning yippee!! clean start for another day!!! cant wait to seize it, hope everyone does too!!!

[white--moon]

Ichigo pauses. He honestly can’t think of a single good reason Shiro shouldn’t like his attention. Ichigo wants him to now that he’s thinking about it and not just trying to argue. “That’s a good point. No. Keep doing that.” He wrinkles his nose. “Hey. You spent a lot of time trying to get on my nerves at first.” But he throws Shiro a glance. “Or… I thought. At one point I just figured you were multitasking, trying to annoy me and get laid. When did it turn to just trying to get in my pants?” He’s genuinely curious about this. Maybe he is an idiot. He thinks Shiro tried to explain it before, but he was just as clueless then.

He sighs though. “Yeah, I figured you knew. I complained about it enough. But it’s fine. I’m over it. I don’t think it ever bothered me the way it bothers you. I was more mad about my life turning to shit.” Which he’s also not mad about anymore. He doesn’t think Shiro meant to help him be more honest with himself, but he did.

Ichigo has a moment of mental stuttering where he realizes he was implying lifelong. That’s what he thinks of when he thinks of a good relationship. He frowns but it’s contemplative. “I never really wanted to bounce through a hundred different relationships, so I guess so. I’d rather not bother if it came to that.” Which might explain a lot of why it took him so long to say something to Shiro. He doesn’t think it’ll work, but he wants to try. Probably because he’s so sadly and incurably infatuated. “No, I didn’t think I’d sink that low until it was happening. I really, really wanted you dead. I kept wondering what the hell I was doing and if I could find a psychiatrist that wouldn’t rat me out for the murdery bits.” It takes him a second, but he does recall he’s talking to Shiro about Shiro and maybe that’s not flattering. “But… uh. It was hard to kill you, because you were distracting and hot when you got serious.”

He grits out something of a frustrated growl. “I said it was both. Don’t make me explain it. I’ll literally die if I have to detail every fucked up thing that gets my dick hard.”

He huffs a laugh. Maybe. As if they don’t fuck like rabbits. He shrugs. “Takes one to know one.” The question just brings a lot of guilt to the surface as he thinks of every horrible thing he did in that relationship that might deserve him getting his ass kicked. And then he stops as it dawns on him that he heard what he wanted to. He freezes in front of the entrance. “You mean did she call me?” He shakes his head. “I thought you asked if she hit me. No. We didn’t hook up. We had dinner but that was just… going over everything. I think she has some of my clothes, stuff like that.” He’s tired just thinking about it, so he steps inside.

He shakes his head a little but it's more amusement than exasperation. The expression Ichigo makes is surprisingly endearing what the hell. A crooked smirk tugs at one corner of his mouth. "Yeah, 'cause it's fun bein' on your nerves. But I was tryin' to get into your pants pretty much right from the start. I kinda figured you hadn't realized you liked guys yet and were confused and angry about it, on top of bein' angry about the rest of the situation." He supposes Ichigo's assumption that he was trying to annoy Ichigo and get in his pants at the same time isn't exactly wrong. He was definitely entertained. "You were attractive right from the start, but then you were also so feisty and that made me want you more."

He frowns lightly, but supposes that's fair. "I guess at first I was usin' you, that was kinda the nature of the arrangement, but not more recently." At least he hadn't realized what they were doing seemed that way. He started giving Ichigo pretty much everything he wanted whenever he could, which is easy since it's always just the most violent task he has at any given moment. Maybe he needs to do better, which makes him realize he doesn't really know how to do better.

Those words lock something up inside Shiro. "But how're you supposed to know it cant work out that way if you don't give it a chance at all?" It's a genuine question. He's literally never thought that far ahead in his entire life. What does life long even mean? Could end up being a few hours on a bad day, could end up being another fifty years for a normal person. He and Ichigo aren't normal people. Ichigo keeps talking; Shiro throws a hand over his chest like he's mortally wounded. Sink as low as to bang him? "Ouch, damn." He's not actually offended though. He waves it off. "I'm distracting and hot all the time. Any stoned asshole at the warehouse could'a saved you your money. Wouldn't'a taken a psychiatrist to tell you what was happening. You know Rukia and Red had a bet goin' on how long it'd take for us to hook up? She asked me like two weeks into you bein' around if it had happened yet. Red won 'cause, according to her, we're both idiots." Which he takes to mean she thought it would happen sooner than it did.

He slides a sideways look in Ichigo's direction at that frustrated sound. "I wasn't gonna ask."

He's trailing at Ichigo's side toward the entrance when Ichigo pauses and looks like he just had a realization. Their conversation isn't that deep. "Yeeah..." Of course that's what he was asking. But he snorts a laugh and rolls his eyes, because it figures Ichigo would hear something more violent. He doesn't really have much to say about the rest. It sounds pretty normal for the end of a relationship to him, but what would he know. So he follows Ichigo inside.

[chikkou]

someone probably asked this already but would u feel like writting on your thoughts on dingalings opinions/statements about buddy? i never got to around to play the lisa games after the first one but im getting the context both from the stuff uve written on it and my gf who played the game and she seems like the best character in the game imo

well im glad u asked.... (does a gay little walk over to the keyboard)

ok so as was mentioned by the last lisa anon i got, buddy is austins least favorite character. i cant recall if he ever specified why exactly in public, but i have seen an interview that he did shortly after the painful came out, so i think i have a LITTLE more context for his thought process (and please remember this is all conjecture, i literally dont know this man LMAO)

so first, for some background: buddy was adopted by brad when he found her abandoned as a baby, but her birth father is dr. yado, the man who created olathe (with buzzo!). she bears a notably striking resemblance to lisa, especially as she gets older - in fact, i think thats part of why brad chose to keep her. for reference, heres lisa, and heres buddy. obviously these are sprites and not indicative of their exact appearance, but this should make it pretty obvious what i mean. note that, even though brad knows how unsafe it is for buddy to “look like a girl,” he still keeps her hair long like lisas was. buzzo noted the similarity between them in the joyful as well. brad also treats her in a similar (but NOT the exact same) manner that marty did to lisa, but i will get into that in another ask i got LMAO

now, as to why austin doesnt like her. so, this may be reading into things a little too much, but i know for a fact that brad is austins favorite character, AND that austin based brads character and experiences on that of his own father, whom he had a sort of mixed relationship with by his own admission (and i believe his dad was also named “bradley” skjfsds). i dont know any details about this at all, but to my understanding, austins dad also wrestled with addiction, and had a bit of a “rough” personality like brad. austin mentioned in that interview dealing with resentment toward his father for a long time, but that he eventually realized that his father was doing the best that he could in spite of his own upbringing, and even though it didnt excuse the shitty stuff hed done, it made austin somewhat more understanding of the difficult position he was in. so, if brad is austins dad.... well, its not that far of a leap to speculate who buddy likely represents. and it colors a lot of the way he depicts her actions.

the painful, for all its amazing content, sort of dropped the ball on showing why buddy hated brad so much. the only things we know about buddy and brads relationship in that game come from the intro or directly from buddy, and since she never goes into detail (which is fair in-context since brad clearly knows the intricacies of their relationship LMAO), it makes it seem like the worst thing brad has done is forced buddy to stay inside and occasionally passed out from substance abuse. however, as we learn in the joyful, that is not true at all. brad insulted buddy (called her an idiot for asking about brads estranged son), forced her to kill at least two innocent men because, and i quote, “my daughter will not be weak,” and tried to isolate her from the only other people in her life (her uncles, rick, sticky, and cheeks) after they DARED to tell her a small tidbit about brads past. brad may not have been anywhere near as abusive as marty, but if i described all of these things together and asked a random person if they considered them abusive behaviors for a parent, i think id be likely to get an affirmative response.

now, this is not to say that austin doesnt make it a point to show brad mistreating buddy in the painful proper - in the marty scene, brad literally punts buddy across a room because she begs him not to kill him, and then when she throws herself between marty and brad to get him to stop, brad doesnt hesitate to beat the fuck out of her until she has to withdraw. remember too that buddy is not an adult, by any stretch of the imagination - austin confirmed on twitter that she is nowhere near 18. i personally put her age in the 10-12 range, but ive seen people go as high as 14 or 15. in either case, though, this is a fucking CHILD, and beating her like he did is no different than what marty used to do to both him and lisa.

even in spite of this stuff, though, fans are so much more willing to forgive brads behavior than buddys. there are a few reasons for this, but in a more meta-sense, theres a pretty clear reason why buddy is less sympathetic - because we spend WAY less time with her. in the painful, buddy is not on screen until maybe 5-10 hours into gameplay, and we dont even get any real time with her until the games second half. the joyful, in addition to that, is an EXTREMELY short game; the painful is about 20-30 hours, but the joyful runs about 5 hours max. it was a kickstarter stretch goal, and i honestly wish austin hadnt made it a stretch goal and had spent more time working on it, because while it does some really interesting stuff story-wise, it is severely lacking the run time to make buddys story as compelling as brads.  

primarily, though, i believe its because brad gets freudian excuses that at least EXPLAIN his behavior and also show just how many demons he has been fighting. while buddy has just as good of a reason to be the way she is, we never really get to SEE this stuff point blank like we did with brad. we witness him being hurt and mistreated as a kid, and more still as an adult in flashbacks. we get almost nothing from buddy, even though it is obvious that she is suffering in a very unique way. 

so, circling back to your question - why is buddy austins least favorite? i think, quite simply, he seems to identify with her character in the context of buddys relationship with brad, and that actually makes him like her LESS because he has the benefit of hindsight and experience-based wisdom to empathize much more with the brads character and experiences than buddys. so even though brad and buddy are the same in many ways, where he can see brads actions as understandable (if a bit extreme), he cant see buddys in quite the same way. it would be fine if he just felt that way privately, but unfortunately it leaks into the games themselves and leads to many fans not being able to see her perspective and empathize with her, either. and it really does suck bc buddy is definitely one of the most interesting video game protags ive ever seen LMAO

tl;dr austin probably dislikes buddy because brad is based on his own father, and the relationship between brad and buddy is very likely based on his own relationship with his father. there also wasnt enough time in buddys game for her to become more sympathetic, so if ur not really paying attention, it seems like shes just being a bratty teenager instead of, u know. a victim of abuse on a massive scale. so yeah 

[sparkie96]

How do you feel about an AU Chreon, Leon's 9 months pregnant and has been kidnapped, And Chris comes to save him but he going into labor... and their B.O.W's (I got the idea from some movie I've seen about a deaf girl and her mom going into labor in the bathroom... I can't remember the name of it, but it's good) Sorry this is so long, I hope you enjoy it :)

(Yeah, I’m not really good at that kind of stuff and that movie made me a bit uncomfortable so...

I have a preview of an upcoming fic if that makes up for it?)

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

And yet, here he was, in a hospital room with a peeved and annoyed Omega. The peace was over and the old Leon was back, glaring at Chris as he held their son, feeding the baby. He couldn’t read Leon as easily as he could before, the Omega’s body language a bit more difficult to decipher than before. Leon’s eyes were obviously angry, but at the same time, it looked like the scowl he always wore. 

The doctors and nurses fluttered in and out of the room, checking on Leon and the baby, offering to fetch Leon food and running tests just to make sure both the mother and child were in perfect health. They acknowledged Chris as well, of course, asking if he needed anything and how he felt about being a new father. 

“You two must be so happy!” One of the nurses gushed, “Congratulations!” 

Leon merely hummed in reply, not looking Chris in the eye at the moment and instead focused on the little television at the foot of the bed, watching whatever it was that they had put on for them. Either way, he couldn’t look Chris directly in the face without wanting to punch him in it. The nurses and doctors finally gave them privacy, congratulating them once more before closing the door behind them, going out to tend to the other patients.

It was quiet, neither speaking to the other. Chris cleared his throat, trying to get Leon’s attention, but the Omega deliberately ignored him. Ollie cooed as he fed from his mother, Leon gently pulling him off to burp him. Chris watched intently, making sure Leon didn’t try anything that would end up hurting the little baby. Or maybe he was watching out of his own paranoia, to make sure Leon didn’t try to pull something that would end up hurting Chris. 

“So…” Chris began, “Ollie is absolutely perfect.” 

Leon raised his brows for a moment, but said nothing in reply, rocking the baby in his arms slowly. His attention was focused solely on the little one, pretending Chris wasn’t right there in his space. He was afraid he might do something he might regret if he looked up at the elder.

Chris sighed, “You’re mad at me.” 

“You think?” Leon asked with a dark chuckle, “Boy, I can’t imagine why!” 

“Hey! You can’t be mad at me! I wasn’t the one who assisted an international terrorist!” Chris hissed. 

“She was a key fucking witness, you Fuckwit!” Leon argued, “You let the actual terrorist walk free and then had me fucking facilitated! And then, you fucking took me to your home and fucking took advantage of me!"  

“One: Ada has been involved with numerous terrorist organizations and worked with the likes of Wesker and Neo-Umbrella. You could have apprehended her at any time, but each time you let her walk after you two exchanged goo-goo eyes and played Patty-Cake! Two: Simmons is clean, we found nothing. Three: You had yourself facilitated! That was on you!” Chris hollered, the commotion disturbing Ollie’s nap and making the baby cry loudly, "And I took you home because no one else would-!"

Before they could go any further, another nurse came back with Leon’s lunch, both Chris and Leon freezing and looking at the nurse. The man apologized for interrupting them, asking if everything was alright in here. Cold blue orbs met equally cold brown briefly, exchanging angry looks as Chris gave a nod, and a faux smile, telling the nurse that everything was just peachy. They were just having a conversation...a very loud conversation and had accidentally woken the baby from his nap. 

The nurse beamed, setting the tray of food down on the little side table next to Leon’s hospital bed. Leon gave his own faux smile, noticing the nurse examining him. The man canted his head, asking Chris if Leon was one of those facility Omegas. He recalled Chris mentioning it prior to the baby’s birth, saying that Leon was one and had been prepared for these kinds of things. 

“Oh...yeah. He is.” Chris confirmed, “Why? Is there something wrong?” 

The nurse looked to Leon again, the Omega clearly confused and annoyed, “I don’t know...but aren’t those types of Omegas supposed to be...happy and sunshine and rainbows twenty-four-seven? Leon seems a bit more...doom and gloom. During the birth, he seemed a tad...feral.” The nurse explained. 

Chris scoffed, “What? No! He was in pain! Of course he seemed feral! Birth isn’t exactly a ticklish process! He’ll be fine once I get him back home! Right, Leon?” 

Leon looked between the nurse and Chris, giving an even bigger smile and a nod, looking more unhinged than friendly, “Absolutely! I am absolutely ecstatic about the birth of our precious baby boy! I cannot wait to go back to my Omega duties and care for my mate and child!” 

The nurse raised a brow, a bit disturbed at the unnatural smile Leon wore and the overly happy and kind of robotic tone that Leon spoke with. He merely shook his head, mentally saying that maybe he was just a bit too tired due to the long shift. He apologized for his prodding and congratulated them on the birth of their child before excusing himself from their hospital room. 

Chris gave Leon a look, “Yeah...I think that was definitely convincing. Not at all suspicious…” he said sarcastically. 

“Oh, fuck off.” Leon said with a sigh, digging into his lunch. 

________________________________________________________________

Leon and Ollie were kept overnight, Chris not leaving their side for even a second. Leon asked exactly what had happened between now and China, saying that his memory had been really fuzzy after China. He could only minimally remember the facility, up until a certain point. And then it was nothing but painful white noise, drawing a blank.

Chris held Ollie as he contemplated telling Leon the truth. He then told him what had happened without going too in depth with the details, saying that Ada Wong and Neo-Umbrella had been disposed of, Ada having been killed by suits in a helicopter and the facilities in the gulf had been taken care of. Piers had been lost in the process...thanks to Ada's pet project, but they had been in the process of looking for him, saying that it was possible that he could still be alive. Or at least locate a body so his family could have a body to bury in New England. 

Then, there had been news that Leon had gone "feral" and due to his behavior, the courts and DSO had facilitated him. Helena had been incarcerated for assisting Leon and Ada in the attacks and agents within the DSO had been arrested as well for helping and colluding with Neo-Umbrella operatives, including Ingrid Hunnigan for assisting Helena and Leon after Tall Oaks. 

Leon listened intently, feeling sick to his stomach at the news. Christ...he failed Helena, Hunnigan, Adam, the people of Tall Oaks...and even Ada. Christ, how had Simmons gotten away with all of this? Why would Ada do this? Wasn't she above all that? 

"As for the facility bit...they had me fill out paperwork and then made me wait two to three months until you were "Fixed" and showed up at my doorstep all Stepford Housewife out." Chris explained, "What do you remember happening?" 

Leon tried to remember but grunted, holding his head in pain. He tried...he really did, but he only had small flashes of memory, the sound of a machine, a loud whining sound...bright fluorescent lights...almost like...Christ! Why the Hell did his head hurt so much? Why couldn't he remember?

"I don't know...I can't remember…" Leon admitted, "Head hurts like a bitch to try…" 

Chris hummed, "That might be due to the electro shock therapy they put you through while you were there." He explained, "You showed up with these marks on both of your temples, and Dr. Policki said that it was all part of your treatment." 

"Yeah, cause that's legal…" Leon replied sarcastically, "So...when can I go home?" 

"You and Ollie will be dismissed tomorrow morning if all the tests look good and you feel good enough to do so." Chris explained. 

"And what about you?" Leon asked, wondering if the Alpha had previously understood what Leon had been implying. 

Chris caught on, "You don't have an apartment to go back to...or a job. They ransacked the apartment and your office...you live with me now for a reason." He reminded him, "Legally, and I hate to be the one to tell you this, I own you." 

"I'm not property." Leon growled, "I should be able to come and go as I please." 

"Not anymore." Chris pointed out, "Not after all the shit you've been involved with. You were considered a threat to the public...hell, you're technically still a threat now that the hypnosis wore off. The government stripped you of everything and declared you feral." 

Leon scoffed and shook his head at Chris, asking the man if he was serious. Chris only gave him a look, saying that he was dead serious and Leon wasn't going anywhere unless he had an escort or Chris was with him. He was lucky to be allowed to go outside at all. Leon argued that he wasn't a threat...because he didn't have anything to do with the Tall Oaks incident. Yes, he shot the president, but the man had already turned by the time he did so, and he even hesitated when he did so. That it was Simmons who was behind everything. 

Chris shook his head, waving Leon off, "Leon, enough." He said sternly, "The BSAA and the DSO have their evidence that you and Agent Harper colluded with Ada Wong and caused all of this. From Edonia, to Tall Oaks." 

Leon narrowed his eyes, "What...the Hell is Edonia?" He asked, sounding genuinely confused. 

Chris sighed and shook his head again, "I don't want to talk about it. Not now." 

"Why? How can I be responsible for any of that if-?" 

"Enough!" Chris repeated, "I don't...just, for once in your life, shut up. Please." 

"No! You're accusing me of something I didn't do! I was arrested for shit I had no involvement in and now you, a man I thought I could trust, won't even let me explain myself!" Leon protested. 

"What is there left to explain?" Chris asked, "We have all the evidence. The DSO does too and you've already been convicted, done your time and now you're serving your sentence. Just stop before you make things worse for yourself." 

Leon let out an over exasperated growl of frustration, choosing to shut up and sit back in the bed. He crossed his arms and merely glared up at Chris. The Alpha gave a sigh and relaxed in his seat, looking from Ollie to the Omega, watching Leon. 

This wasn't going to be smooth sailing from here on out.

[xxwritemeastoryxx]

I’ve Got You

Author: xxwritemeastoryxx

Pairings: Elijah Mikaelson x Reader

Word Count: 1.2k

Warnings: Mentions of past domestic violence (possible triggers in this one), mentions of panic attacks, 

Author’s Note: I needed an outlet today. While I've had moments in the past that have caused panic attacks, this one was by far the worst. I should be strong enough to handle it. But unfortunately triggers are out there in the world and we can't always be prepared for them. I was in a safe environment. I was having the best day, but hearing a single name had caused a panic attack right in the middle of grabbing a few things I needed for my assignment at work. I didn't believe anyone would understand so I dealt with it by myself. The moment I got home, I broke down and let it all out. This is part of that outlet. Feel free to skip this one if you want. 

(Gif credit goes to rightful owner)

Your mind was elsewhere. No matter how many times you tried to get your mind to focus, it never failed that moments later it went back to the very thing you wanted to forget. With each thought that came rushing back, your vision would become blurry before you blinked back the tears to stop them from falling. Some managed to break a way before you quickly wiped them away.

After several years of believing you were fine, that every piece that was broken was now fixed, this was completely different kind of hurt. The years that you had spent building yourself up, and building a wall, from the details of a past that you wanted to forget were falling apart all within a moment that you had no control over.

The love, laughter and even strength you had built had been replaced in your mind. Words that wounded you in more ways than one, the actions that manipulated you, the broken promises flooded your mind. What started off as an amazing day had now been clouded because your mind couldn't handle hearing one single detail.

"Hey," The voice was soft. Almost a soft whisper but it had sounded loud in your ears causing you to jump and turn towards the voice. You found Elijah standing there. At first there was a look of humor on his face at seeing you jump. It was soon replaced with concern the moment he took in your eyes. "What is it?"

Even though there was something clearly wrong, you shook your head. "It's nothing."

"Y/N, this isn't nothing." He watched as you tried blinking back the tears that were threatening to let go.

Your bottom lip trembled as you the words registered in your head. He was right, this wasn't nothing. Your day had gone from the best to one of the worst. You couldn't even get your brain to form a way that would make sense except one phrase.

"I'm broken." The words had left your lips as a whisper and the tears came so easily with them. You didn't bother trying to stop them. You had been holding them back for a majority of the day. It had surprised you that you had even made it this long without breaking down.

"You're not." Elijah shook his head slightly. He may have not known what happened, but in his eyes you were far from broken.

"I am." A shuddered breath followed your words. The back of your hands came up to your cheeks to wipe the tears that had been falling down your cheeks. "I wasn't always this broken. But then my ex came along and broke me in ways that I wouldn’t even know where to begin to explain how."

The thoughts that played through your head weren't rainbows and sunshine of the time you had shared together. You could clearly see the fights, the way you were manipulated, the bruises that lingered on your body that you tried so hard to hide, all of it played on an endless loop.

"I have felt safe here." You said once the memories played through. "There hasn't been a moment of doubt that I have moved on and lived my life in the best way I could." You watched as Elijah just listened. It was what you needed in that moment. Just for someone to listen. "But someone called out their name at work and I became so scared. Even though I know they cant be there, I couldn't stop the panic attack from coming."

Elijah pulled you to him at that moment and wrapped his arms around you. Your arms quickly wrapped around him as you welcomed the hug. Elijah hadn't needed to hear anything else. He understood what you needed without you having to say it.

You needed to feel safe. You just needed to feel that even when your mind was giving you every reason to believe you were in danger, that you were safe right where you were. That at this very moment, there wasn't someone waiting to take their anger out on you. That there wasn't someone who was going to make you believe that you were worthless. That even though you currently had no idea where in the world they could be, you were as safe as you could ever be. The proof of that was being in the arms of Elijah Mikaelson.

He let you cry it out. He let you get everything out that you had been holding back since earlier. He didn't care that your tears would seep into his suit. He didn't care if it would take hours until you felt even the slightest bit better. He wasn't going to leave you any time soon.

"I've got you." He said loud enough for you to hear him over your own muffled crying. "I'm not going anywhere." His hand moved soothingly over your back. He felt your arms tighten slightly at the reassurance.

Elijah didn't leave your side even after you had stopped crying. He wasn't going to leave you until he was sure you had completely worked through the trigger. You both sat on your bed, you looking down at your hands while he watched you do so.

"It was just so unexpected." You said as you looked up at him for a moment. "I usually can handle them. I can work around them without needing to bother others. Work was meant to be my safe place besides here."

"Now you know about this other person that works there with the same name. It will make things easier if it were to happen again." He said with a reassuring smile.

You gave him a small smile back. "I also know that there is no way they'd ever be there. They couldn't tolerate some things, work would have made them crazy."

He chuckled as he shook his head. "I do recall that was one of the reasons you had accepted the job. It made you feel safe since it was the last place they'd look."

That made your smile grow a bit. "It amazes me that you remember that."

"How could I not?" He placed his hand on top of your knee. "You lit up in a way I hardly see you do just because you got the job. You come home and you look so happy with the work that you do."

"That's the difference between you and them." You said with a nod. "I wouldn't be able to talk to them about anything like I do with you. You've gotten me to open up when all I was used to was suffering in silence."

You shook your head at the thought of what you used to do. While there were a million times you wished you had known what would happen, you couldn't linger on the what ifs. You had got out of that situation and that was all that mattered to you.

"You'll never have to do that here." He promised. "I'll always be here to help you whenever you need. I would only ever encourage you to do what you'd want to. I'd never force anything on you."

"Even when I'm being stubborn?" While the matter was serious, there was a bit of humor behind your question.

Today was just a simple set back and you knew that. All the years of progress you had made wouldn't be destroyed because of today. You'd be able to build from it. You'd be able to reinforce those walls that kept the darker memories at bay.

"Especially when you are being stubborn." He gave a chuckle that caused you to grin.

Yeah, you'd definitely be okay.

Always and Forever: @taylordrunkonwhiskey​ @thewolf-and-thesheep​ @wayward-dan​ @neeadinghugs​ @fafulous​ @kenmen02​ @elizamonet​ @dora-the-grownup​ @mschellehitt​ @xanderling​ @fandom-princess-forevermore​ @buckysarm4​ @helenasingers​

Stag Tag:  @elejah-wonderland​ @cheers-my-dears-16​ @xxsoveriegnsarayaxx​

[brinesystem]

man

lifes bittersweet

and im gonna go on a rant? but like, a happy one???? idk man

ill put it under a cut or somethin

uh warning for like trauma mentions, if you skip the first half which is all like solid paragraphs you should be able to move right over it.

okay, so for a summary of my life real quick, and this will be p quick...

born, had no dad, lived in DC when 9/11 hit (like, walking distance to everything, IN the city DC), gained a marine dad, moved around on bases a lot, found out that im autistic and have adhd, bullied a lot in school, moved around more, got two sisters, bullied OUT of middle school, re entered a new school, bullied there too, and tHEN my memory actually starts, cause i started existing in hs?

hs also sucked though? and i was abused and became a csa/grooming victim but only online so i feel weird even taking that label, but i AM one in the end? and was so young somehow??? tbh its worse than im putting it but this is the quick version. was abused more emotionally/verbally, physically threatened at home and bullied in school right? almost lost our house too cause we were MAJORLY BROKE. Like, SUPER badly broke.

We get out of there, my mum actually gets our dad to knock it off, i fail out of hs because they changed the grading rules MID-YEAR and didnt tell me until it was too late to fix my grades for it.

cue mental breakdown, which included losing the ability to read for years, and trauma processing, etc etc. this also includes me becoming disabled, because prior to that, i actually wasnt???? i had some issues, but i wasnt disabled. now i am.

got a service dog, the dad ruined that too because he scared him a lot as a puppy and when we finally got to get him to Stop Doing That, it was too late. then the dog gets attacked twice. in home service dog only i guess now.

and then i realise, “oh fuck wait i have did”

forget about it for a year, realised/remembered it like last year and finally start doing some work with the system, finds out ive basically been fronting for like, 10 years straight at this point. only this year managed to let alters other than Fae front more, because i knew about Fae for years? but i didnt know he was an alter?????? look im dumb okay its fine.

anyways.

point is that like, i dont REMEMBER most of this? this summary type shit is what i remember, and then everything else is either a blackout, or just... blurry.

like theres some details and whatever but its mostly just snapshots, and then before hs theres even less blurry and less snapshots and its mostly just black space.

but.

im here?

like, were all here.

my system, we made it. and were alive?

like, none of us thought wed live to 20 but here i am at 24 and im actually usually happy????

its not been EASY at all, but like... i dont know?

my systems my family and i adore them more than i can put into words. the ‘scary’ ones? love them. im not afraid of them because theyre here and in our system with me and are here to help. ones been helping for longer than ive existed, like??? thats amazing? good job???? fuck.

anyways.

we werent doing okay for a long time, and then we split a lot during trauma processing pt.1 because like. no therapist. i dont recommend doing that btw dont trauma process without a therapist its not worth it.

but like.

a lot changed and i know i split shit and lost some of the memories i used to have. i KNOW that happened, because i remember remembering things that i cant recall now.

which is a weird feeling but im sure you get it.

but like.

im glad we did? like i get it. and i know that some of those alters dont front much/at all/ever anymore, but i think theyre still in there somewhere... and i love them?

theyre great. and they helped us a ton.

and two of the alters that split from that (or the trauma before maybe? idk) integrated and the result is another alter (and a completed fragment) and theyre both amazing too???

i know a lot of people complain about getting more alters or splitting or fragments and such but i just...

i dont know. maybe im just really fucking lucky... and i wouldnt put that past this tbh. but i dont mind it? we function a ton better like this, and its... so nice to see them be able to interact with people?

also theyre both introjects who LOVE interacting with others alters from their source and like

its so nice to know theyre here and happy and found the people they love again?

and i have feelings on introjects and i know theres a lot of drama going on for some reason but like. a part of did is that your relationships from the beginning of your life arent stable, right? and these introjects, they not only have those relationships in theory, but they managed to find them again?? here and now?

they have what we werent able to before, and im so happy for them and theyre delighted about it and its just...

idk.

im really happy sappy and emotional and i just am kind of writing a love letter to my system right now i guess.

cause we made it. were here and tbh this year? sucks ass. the past four years have sucked ass. a LOT of shit sucks ass. but we’re still here. were standing and fighting and enjoying life and just...

one of the alters who integrated is the one who managed to stop us from being suicidal, because he convinced me that like... “if you hate your life, that means youre not enjoying it. so, if youre not having fun, its not a life worth living to you. so have fun.”

and that was life changing for us?????

for ME?

and hes Honey now and honey is joyous and enjoys life to the fullest

but the other alter who made up honey wasnt able to do that.

and now they both are? as honey?

and thats fucking amazing????????? like????

i dont feel like i lost either of them. theyre just Honey now. and hes loving life???

i mean yeah hes got a full range of emotions now which means he can feel sad and angry while the others has more limited but like... isnt that better?

isnt it so much better to feel those?

it feels so much less shallow when youre overjoyed when you know what sorrow feels like. its so much deeper because theres that bittersweet tinge of “it wasnt always like this”

and i think thats what im getting at.

it wasnt always like this.

and it wont always be like this.

but we made it this far...

so i want to keep going.

[gil-notskajla]

So xerath skin confirmed how you feel

I'm conflicted.

As much as I enjoy reading about Xerath in lore and go crazy when anything happens lorewise, skins info gives me a bad feeling. It's mostly caused by circumstances: Riot announced skins for champions who didn't get a skin for a long time. It looks like they just thought: "yeah.. these guys rioting on the back are soo annoying... just throw 'em whatever and get back to lux skins"

And I don't want whatever. I don't want trash.

The worst part is that Riot doesn't do cheap skins anymore. Everything costs 1350 no matter if its good or terrible. It isn't about how well things go together, it's about how many artists and animators worked on it and for how long. That's fair, but at least pay attention to what works and what doesn't.

And I will tell you what works and what doesn't.

Battlecast, Runeborn - nothing flashy, but works

Scorched - semi-works, flashy, best skin to equip if you are in Prestige_XerathTM mood

Guardian - disgusting mess which isnt worth a single penny (i respect guy who made a concept and guy who made splash (splash is beautiful), he had a vision; animator got paid soo whatever; but nevertheless - skin is shitty and doesnt work at all, i regret paying for it, even to i paid with 80%, its not worth it at all)

Why cheap skins work? People call 'em chromas but honestly these are my faves. First, what should work for all skins: attacks are well saturated what makes them comfortable to use in game. Nothing else because those are just repainted defaults. Idle animations work and emotes work as well. Xerath's dance and "Closing Sarcophagus"(CS) emotes are a micro-culture of xerath mains. They are super important and they are an absolute must of all the things that work. These dont work - skin doesn't work. on both skins parts of sarcophagus fit each other what allows them to close into a certain form - it looks great. And dance emote works as it should.

Scorched semi-works because even tho sarcophagus cant close, it looks good - its color palette is well picked, pieces are of a fine sized parts which match each other, his body is 2D but has different texture lava-fire-like which doesnt  look way to off, and dance emote works.

Guardian...oh boy.... Guardian doesnt work in any way. Color theory was abadoned when they were coloring him. Parts dont fit eachother. Mark is way to dark and of complitely different shade of purple (blueish instead of plum). His body is in obviously, painfuly 2D what is impossible to not notice because of darker contouring of light form. Animations suck (except of B, but its only because its his only animated recall). In dance platings are too big and dont allow for full round movements of arms. And CS... lets say he turns into a qantum flower durring epilepsy episode. Absolutely hideous abomination and the worst part is that what you get on splash looks NOTHING like what you have in game. You buy it, cant wait to try it out and when you finally do, you just wanna click the return button instantly. And it costs 1350.

Soo now that we have it all clear, since Xerath skins are called chromas, we want next chroma: pink/purple/white/black or brown. Since we are fans of neglected child our standards arent high:

Dream come true skin for Xerath is this black concept by Tink29

Sarcophagus is made of fitting parts, voidlike substance gives eerie feelings and its majestic. But its never gonna happen because Riot would LITERALLY DIE if they made a good solo skin for unpopular champion. Another idea is white as elementalist (yes, i am delusional) or some nice wind related or somethin' (ive made this concept basing on raider outfit since xerath is a leader of western raiders and planed to finnish it with colors fitting raider costume with very bright, white/light-lime arcane. Its not good for CS animation but its light, and flowing with all the light elements like material straps on the mask and wing-like details)

but its not an option as well.

Brown (with for example... sugar rush theme) wont happen because its not obvious. Soo my guess is either pink or purple and it's gonna be either Voidborn (god please let it be voidborn) or space related, most likely Darkstar (ok i guess). Best way how voidborn could end up looking like is probably this fanart by BlazeMalefica

not only did the artist remmember about the seal (which is kinda a big deal, 50%-of-his-mental-issues deal for xerath) and turned it into the eye but its also capable of closing, animating properly, its not noisy what makes him more readable, has one specific color (pink) and is built on something that already exists. It's perfect for both players and Riot (and it would be also cheaper probably, just sayin'..). If they decide to make Darkstar (ive abadoned Cosmic or Hextech - not gonna happen, it would be to good)im afraid that they will do a color hoarding of purple, blue, black.. literally whatever, slap it all together on the sarcophagus, shape it into some wild shapes, ignore all the animations, do a recall, slap 2D core and call it "Black is new Gold: Guardian of the Sands 2.0 even more retarded than its predecessor" and it will look like this noisy af mess of a bitch (by Slow Damn)

or in best case scenario for which i count if its dark star

by Thorsten Erdt.

and i can bet all my 1300 Eververse silver that Riot will do everything to make it look like shit in game by cutting the funds soo lets do something less risky, easier soo they wont fuck it up.

But that's just my predictions and when it finally comes out I will rate it. Let's hope for the best (void or darkstar, no matter, just give us the purple, the pink, working sarcophagus and limbs)! If its good maybe i will even make a break from Destiny to try it out! 👀👌🏻

[iwillgiveyoumyhappiness]

전웅, Jeon Woong

anonymous asked:

Ooo could I request a Woong scenario where you’re a successful solo artist and you’re Woong’s crush, and he ends up meeting you at an award show and you guys become friends? And maybe after a while he confesses on how much he likes you and it’s just fluff? Thank you so much! I also enjoy your other scenarios and I cant wait for future works!

Group: AB6IX

Member: Woong

(A/N) Listen to this with Winter Bear by V 

.

.

.

Woong watched you perform with admiration-filled eyes. 

When Donghyun had first posed the idea of going to watch a concert of a newly debuted artist, he wasn’t all too sold on the idea. On his day off, he would’ve rather stayed in bed and relaxed, but he was beyond relieved that Donghyun had convinced him. 

“Since she just debuted,” Donghyun had said, “the tickets are super cheap. If she blows up, they’re never gonna be like this again.” 

Woong furrowed his brows contemplatively. “I don’t know...” he trailed off. “I kinda just wanted to pass out today.” 

He crossed his arms and pouted. “Please?” he asked, puppy-eyes prominent. “It’s late, so you can still laze around all day.” 

Finally, Woong had relented. “Fine!” he groaned. “I’ll go with you.” 

And God, was he glad that he did. 

There was something about the way your voice melded with the instrumentals, the way you were able to easily ad-lib when you felt like it, the stability in your tone as you danced, your ability to entrance the whole crowd with a single pointed glance into the camera. 

Donghyun took a break from cheering to playfully nudge the boy beside him. “This is awesome, right?” he laughed. “Aren’t you glad you came? She’s so cool!” He stared at Woong who sat unmoving, his eyes fixed on your performance. 

“Dude, are you okay?” he chuckled. “You look smitten.” 

Woong nodded slowly, just barely registering what he’d said. “I am,” he said, quieter than the music. 

Donghyun leaned in closer, cupping a hand around his ear. “What?” 

He finally tore his eyes away from the stage. “I am!” he shouted. “I think she’s my ideal type.” 

Woong groggily woke from his dream, blinking at the afternoon sun that seeped in through the curtains of the living room. He sat up on the couch, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. 

He looked around drowsily before sighing. He often dreamed of that memory, trying to recall the retails of that night. He had such a flutter in his chest from the concert and his adrenaline and excitement was so high, it was as if it had never happened at all when his high wore off. 

As time went on, it was harder and harder to recall the exact details, everything feeling like a fuzzy blur. “I feel like I’m suffering from early-onset dementia,” he huffed to himself, falling back on the couch. He just wanted to remember a fun concert.

Was that too much to ask?

He was certain that he understood ABNEWs better now. This was the legendary ‘post-concert-depression’ that he’d heard so much about on Twitter. 

It was absolutely terrible. 

All he could think about was the flashing lights and the screams. It was so hard to remember the words that you had spoken or the expressions that you had made. 

He wanted to remember that experience he had at your concert all those months ago, and he wanted to remember it well, but he was having the hardest time doing it. He’d gotten a headache over it once or twice. 

He kept mulling over the fact that he’d been so close to the stage. He’d probably never get a chance to be that close to your stages ever again, ever since your popularity skyrocketed. 

What started out as your simple debut a few months ago had shot you into a flash of cameras, overseas trips, a sizable fan-base and the fitting title of: ‘Newest Global Monster Rookie’.

As a fan, he was proud of you. But as someone who wanted to see you again, he was sulky, because he felt as if he’d never relive that moment of being so close to your passion for the stage. 

Daehwi sprinted into the room, jumping onto the couch next to him. It almost gave poor Woong a heart-attack, but the youngest member decided to ignore that small fact. “You excited?” he asked, an eager enthusiasm glimmering in his eyes.

“For?” Woong asked, taking a deep breath after his scare, via Lee Daehwi.

The youngest nudged him a little. “For tomorrow,” he clarified. “Award Show appearance? Ringing any bells?” he teased. 

A soft smile grew on his face. “Yeah,” he said while nodding. “I’m really excited for it.” He leaned his head back, closing his eyes and trying to envision what it would be like for AB6IX to receive an award... Would it be beautiful? “I hope we do well,” he said honestly.

Daehwi chuckled. “You know, I would’ve thought you would’ve been a lot more excited about this,” he said, settling into the cushions and pulling out his phone to mess around on. 

Woong crack open an eye. “I am excited,” he assured him. “What’re you talking about?” 

“I mean, you’re crush is gonna be there, so I just thought—”

Woong shot up, making the youngest jump. “She’s gonna be there?” he asked, suddenly short of breath. Daehwi nodded. Suddenly, Woong felt very self-conscious about his appearance. He messed with his bangs, trying to pull them down further. “Should I get a haircut?” he asked.

Daehwi raised an amused brow. “Why?”

He ran his fingers through his hair, trying to judge the layers through touch. “I just mean, I don’t want it to look ratty,” he said. “Should I cut it?” He ran his fingers through it again. He nodded to himself. “Yeah, I should cut it.” 

Daehwi laughed. “Oh my gosh—your hair looks fine!” he cackled. “You care an awful lot about this,” he noted, raising a brow. 

The older member sighed. “Yeah, I guess I do,” he huffed. He rubbed his eyes, as if hoping that would wake him up further. “It’s dumb, right?” 

“Just a little bit.”

Woong nodded slowly, staring up at the ceiling. “Yeah... Yeah, it’s dumb,” he said, mostly trying to convince himself. He chuckled. “It’s a big event. Chances of me even actually seeing her anywhere other than on stage is really unlikely.” 

Daehwi tilted his head, staring at him curiously. “You know, I’ve never seen you like this before,” he mentioned. “Why do you like her so much?” 

He shrugged, honestly trying to figure it out himself. “I don’t know, really,” he said. “With the heart of a fan, I can simply say that she makes me happy and I want to support her, but I don’t know what else to say other than that. I guess I’m just so interested in what she’s like on-stage, I’ve gotten really curious about the off-stage aspects of her, too.” 

“You know,” Daehwi started, “she’s probably not exactly the same off-stage, right?” 

Woong scoffed under his breath. “Are any of us, really?” he asked. “We all change little aspects about ourselves that we think people will find unlikable. It’s just how our minds work.” Without realizing it, a small smile formed on his lips. 

“That’s why I think it’d be cool to know her personally,” he continued. “I’d like to know about the flaws that she tries to cover up, and maybe one day, she’d be able to see that flaws aren’t so bad. They’re just unique.” 

Daehwi started laughing. “You’re so whipped,” he said in English. 

His brows furrowed. “Wait—what’d you say?” he asked. The youngest only laughed harder, doubling over and nearly flying off the couch. “Lee Daehwi, what did you say?!” 

The group stepped out of the car with excited butterflies in their stomachs. They’d enviously looked at those able to walk across the red carpet before, and now they’d be the ones doing it.

It was a memory they’d keep with them for a long time.

Woong touched Woojin’s shoulder. “You gonna be okay?” he asked, referring to his ankle. 

Woojin nodded. “I’ll be fine,” he promised. He frowned. “I wish I could perform, though.” 

He gave him a small smile. “You’re doing enough,” he assured him. “You’re cool just by sitting there.” He scanned the crowd of reporters and paparazzi. It was overwhelming, but in the best way possible. 

It was like the thrill he got on stage; making him gain energy rather than fear. 

The inside was even more intimidating. There were so many people in the audience, all eagerly awaiting the upcoming performances. It was finally settling in for Woong that he would be performing on that stage soon. 

Him and his group. 

Those bright lights, cameras and expectant eyes would all be on them in less than an hour. It was a sensation that made shivers creep down his spine, but it was in an exhilarating way. 

He took a deep shaky breath and gave his pale cheek a light smack. “Let’s do well, okay?” he told himself under his breath while he looked up at the massive stage from his seat in between Youngmin and Woojin. 

He felt a light tap on his shoulder. It was so feather-light, he didn’t even jump. 

“I think you’ll do well,” he heard. 

He turned around; he felt his heart lurch when he saw the face of the person talking to him. It was the same face he’d seen months ago, though a new color had been dyed into the hair. 

It was your face. Your face that he’d looked up at as you performed on stage with such an addictive fire in your gaze. 

He stood up hurriedly, clumsily pushing his chair back with his knees. Luckily, you caught it and shoved it back upright before it could fall to the floor. He bowed a full 90 degree angle, his cheeks flushed red. “Thank you for saying that,” he choked out. “I’ll try my best!”

His words felt like vomit slipping uncontrollably out of his mouth and he was completely embarrassed (it especially didn’t help that his members were quietly laughing at him and silently judging him), but he was still grateful, down at the core of everything. 

He managed to say something at least. 

He had originally thought that if he finally got to speak to you, he’d be utterly tongue-tied, unable to say anything of true substance, but at least something came out. It was better than an awkward nod or a series of ‘um’s and ‘er’s. 

You laughed at him. “Why’re you being so formal?” you asked, tilting your head. “I debuted after you.”

He stood up straight, his cheeks burning. He couldn’t bring himself to meet your eyes, so he just stared at the floor. “That’s true,” he stuttered, “but...” 

Daehwi turned back in his chair, looking at you. He beckoned you closer, making sure that Woong was still busy searching his brain for decent words. Once you’d leaned close enough, he whispered (not so subtly), “He’s a fan.”

Woong’s eyes widened. “Lee Daehwi!” he snapped, feeling the sudden need to smack the youngest in the face. 

He saw you cover your mouth, holding in a screech. “I’m a fan, too!” you blurted out. His jaw dropped. “That’s one of the reasons I was so surprised when I saw that I got to sit behind you!” 

He watched you stomp your feet with cute excitement. “I’ve been an AB6IX fan since pre-debut!” You looked to Woojin. “How’s your condition, by the way? I saw in an article that you weren’t doing so well.”

Woong supposed that was how his friendship with you began. After that small interaction, Daehwi and Donghyun kept forcing small-talk with you throughout the night. 

A simple ‘how are you enjoying the show so far?’ turned into a congratulations when you won an award, and then one for them when they won, and then exchanged phone-numbers. Fans of both you and AB6IX had gone crazy over the interactions, thinking it was the most endearing thing ever caught on camera.

Woong didn’t really know why, but he was incredibly grateful that his fans liked you as much as he did. There was a certain comfort in it. A feeling like, “Oh. I can openly be friends with you without upsetting the fans that I love”. 

It felt like having a never-ending army of support, and it made him feel warm.

He had always thought that if he kept his heart warm, a person with a warm heart would appear. He’d found himself wondering often nowadays if that warmhearted person was you. 

True enough, his first thoughts about you had been only platonic. He had a school-boy crush on you and he accepted that. He knew you’d be the person that made his heart flutter childishly, but he also expected it to fade quickly once he got to know you. 

He figured he would realize that you were both good friends, but nothing more.

Unfortunately for his busy heart and mind, that wasn’t the case. It wasn’t the case at all. 

In recent weeks, he’d started to find everything you did unbelievably endearing. Even the things he hated—like when you came up behind him and tickled under his arms—he found himself not being able to get enough of it. 

He wanted to be annoyed by you more. He wanted to be teased by you more. He wanted to marvel at you more. He wanted to laugh at your dumb jokes. He wanted to make fun of you for your ugly expressions (which he thought were cute, not ugly).

He wanted to sing with you more. He wanted to learn more choreography together and complain about things with you. He wanted you to stay his friend for a long time. He wanted for you to grow into his best friend. He wanted the both of you to continue to grow from there. 

He wanted your permission to love you fully.

He’d steeled himself in his mind. If he didn’t have your permission, he would give up. It would be slow and painful, but he would do it for your sake. If he couldn’t have you as lover, he refused to lose you as a friend. 

You’d grown too precious to him. 

That’s the reason why he was so hesitant to look at you as you both looked out the window, watching the sunset. 

You glanced at him, a chuckle creeping up the back of your throat. “Why aren’t you looking at me?” you asked quietly, not wanting to disturb the nice atmosphere that was floating around.

He shrugged. “You look ugly,” he said simply. 

You faked a gasp. “I think you mean: gorgeous!” you said, flipping your hair sassily over your shoulder. 

He started laughing. You had a way of putting him at ease. “Fine,” he sighed, finally looking at you. “Gorgeous.” It might’ve just been the color of the sky seeping through the glass, but it looked like your cheeks had flushed red. 

He scanned your features. 

Everyone on the earth has two eyes, a nose, and pair of lips. Overall, nobody is that different from the other... So, why did you look so ethereal to him in this moment? Why did you make his heart hurt so much he felt like crying?

Why did his eyes actually well up?

You looked at him with such concern, it made him grateful for you all over again. “Woongie?” you asked, shuffling closer to him. “Are you okay?” You put a hand on his shoulder. A small show of affection, but greatly appreciated. 

He gave a watery smile, shaking his head. “I don’t know,” he said, wiping his eyes. “I honestly don’t know.” He threw his head back and breathed deeply, trying to keep his tears from spilling out. “I guess I just fully realized that you’re actually beautiful,” he sighed out, his voice raspy. He felt your hand tense on his shoulder. “Like, in that indescribable way you hear about in stories.”

You tittered nervously. “What’re you talking about?” you asked. “You’re acting weird.” 

Once he was sure that his tears would stay in (at least for the time being), he looked to you, trying to gauge your expression. You didn’t look like you would pull away from him. He could trust that much. “Can I ask you something?” he wondered out loud.

You nodded slowly. “Of course you can,” you said. “Anything.” 

“Do you think I deserve to be happy?” he asked with an underlying hesitation in his tone. He didn’t want it to sound like he was guilt-tripping you. 

You looked shocked at the question, your eyes widening. You nodded without hesitation. “Of course I do!” you said. “There’s no one in this world I know that deserves more blessings than you.” Your hand fell from his shoulder, resting unwittingly on his thigh. “All I wish for you is a hopeful life,” you admitted. 

He nibbled his bottom lip thoughtfully, contemplating whether or not he should actually say what he was thinking. With a shaky breath, he made the decision to do so. He didn’t want to live with the regret of never saying this to you. 

“You know...” he started nervously, his palms becoming sweaty and the tips of his ears turning red. He shifted in his seat, not meeting your eyes. He swallowed the lump in his throat. “I’d be really happy... with you,” he finally said. 

He could sense your silence. Your lack of response. It scared him. 

“I’m not saying this to make you feel like you have to return my feelings,” he blurted out, forcing himself to meet your shaking eyes. “I’m saying this because I just wanted you to know how I felt, but I’m putting no pressure on you whatsoever.” 

He stood up, taking a deep breath. “So,” he started, “we can make a decision right now, and you can change your mind whenever you want; no strings attached.” He stood straight and closed his eyes tightly. “If you want things to stay the way they are now, stay seated. If you want... something more,” he said, the scarlet of his ears darkening, “then you can take a step closer to me.” 

He waited with bated breath to hear anything from you. 

A word. A breath. A slight ruffling of clothes, but he heard nothing. 

After what felt like an hour of deafening silence, he finally heard you say something. “On the count of three?” you said in a small voice. Dare he say, shyly. 

He nodded vigorously—reminiscent of a child—his eyes still shut tight. “One,” he started.

“Two,” you continued.

His heart was beating out of his chest. He would guiltily admit to looking forward to hearing you step toward him. He knew it was wrong, but he was left hoping and wanting. He was hoping so much. 

“Three,” he said, barely above a whisper. 

He waiting, his hands shaking. 

Nothing. Not even a noise. 

He chuckled at himself, trying to mask his disappointment. He started opening his eyes. “So, I guess you don’t feel the—?” He was cut off by your arms wrapping around his middle. 

“I’m sorry,” you said, muffled by his chest. “I was zoned out, so I didn’t hear the ‘three’.” You nuzzled farther into him. “I like you, too...” 

He blinked in surprise, not even able to hug you back. Instead, his arms just hung awkwardly in the air, stiff and unmoving. “You... do?” he stuttered. He shook his head, as if trying to wake himself from this unrealistic dream. “For real? No jokes? No feeling obligated to like me back?” 

You laughed at him, pulling away just slightly to meet his eyes. You grabbed his wrists and pulled his arms down farther so that they could snake around your waist. “I’m not kidding,” you said, your eyes turning damp. “I like you,” you whispered. “I really like you.” 

Woong felt a smile spread across his face, growing uncontrollably larger as the second ticked by. “I really like you, too,” he said, a light, fluttery feeling in his chest. “Like... A lot!”

What did people call that feeling?

Affection? Fondness?

Ah, right!

Love.

.

.

.

Hmm.... Mayhaps I am a little fond of this boy. J u s t maybe. 

Thanks for the request, Anon! I had a lot of fun writing it. I hope you enjoyed it a lot and I hope it met expectations. Have a good day/afternoon/evening!

Feel free to stop by again. ^-^

[pynkhues]

Someone mentioned somewhere I cant recall, that Jenna Bans said season 2 was so hard to write. What do you make of that cause I can't fathom it. One would think after 213 with Rio shot and bleeding that season 3 would be hard or harder to write in my opinion. She had material that she purposely left out in S2 from S1 such as Dean having cancer, Rio interacting with Kenny in 102, who was the supervisor that allowed Fine and Frugal to be used for crime, Sara post her transplant. I'm just saying.

Yeah, it’s this little clip here. 

Generally the saying goes that there are two types of writers - plotters and pantsers. Plotters tend to sit down and, well, plot everything out and know exactly where they’re going with everything and have a detailed outline, where as pantsers tend to ‘fly by the seat of their pants’, and just write, even if they have a sort of overall idea of what the story is. Neither of these things are wrong! They’re just different approaches to writing.

I don’t really want to make too many assumptions based off a 40-second clip, but it certainly sounds like Jenna’s a pantser, haha. From this and other interviews, it sounds like she typically goes in with an idea of what the season will be, but is a fairly agile writer in that she’ll respond to things that she and her team think are working and get rid of things that aren’t, and sometimes perhaps chase the story instead of lead it, which, again, isn’t necessarily a bad thing at all, it’s just a different approach.

Just in terms of people I know personally who are writers who write like that (and myself when I occasionally do it), I find they need a strong story editor or even just a lot of time themselves to edit and revisit and to smooth over what they’ve written. I also think that writing like that though can be incredibly fun and can take a story in incredible directions you never would’ve thought of while you were plotting. 

It’s all just different creative processes.

There’s certainly stuff though that I wish  they’d addressed in s2 that they didn’t - Dean’s cancer lie forever being #1 on that list.

[hitchell-mope]

(First film. After “rewrite the stars”. On the isle. Maleficent saw the whole thing)

Jafar: she’s failing

Maleficent: no she is not. She is just

Grimhilde: a teenager. A lovesick. Hormonal. Useless teenager. Y

Maleficent: would the both of you like to be throwing up thorns for the next decade?

(Jafar and Grimhilde shut up)

Maleficent: as I was saying. My daughter is not failing. She is just. Stuck. Like when the infant evaded My detection for sixteen years

Jafar: yes. Yes. If I recall correctly that was because your little runty minions had no idea that children grow

(Grimhilde shrieks in laughter. Maleficent’s eyes glow bright emerald green and the evil queen is being throttled by vines. The shorter woman’s eyes glow a bright sapphire blue and a torrent of glass heads towards the dark fairy who cuts the flow and turns it to sand. Jafar looks on bored out of his skull)

Jafar: ladies ladies. Knock it off. And we ARE right Maleficent. The child is failing. I believe it has something to do with that freckled child

Maleficent: no. He and your son and the carrot and the stick.

Grimhilde: and my daughter

Maleficent: is superfluous to the equation.

Jafar: the child is weak.

Maleficent (ruefully): just like her father

Grimhilde: her father

Maleficent: is a fool. And a traitor. That bastard left me alone with nothing but an energy drain to make up for it

Grimhilde: I remember. I was the midwife

Maleficent: All you did was catch the egg when it popped out.

Grimhilde: then you banished me. And didn’t rescind it until eight years later. I had no one to help me through 72 hours of

Jafar: biniemat allah. Would you both stifle. It’s disgusting talking about woman’s things in polite society

Maleficent: vous salir bâtard. Just because you created you spawn so immaculately with magic doesn’t mean you are the only one who ever gave birth

Jafar: why am I even here. I am a man. I shouldn’t be taking orders from a green skinned heathen

Maleficent: and that is exactly the reason why you lost the fight

Jafar: I lost because you cheated. Which is typical down to the letter with your kind

Grimhilde: halte den Mund, halt den Rand, Halt die Klappe. Du willst meine Tochter heiraten. Du bekommst kein Mitspracherecht

Jafar: I am a sultan

Grimhilde: abgesetzt

Maleficent: as I was saying before personal grievances entered the matter. They have not failed. Mal knows what will happen if they do

Grimhilde: ab mit ihren Köpfen

Jafar: iqtew ru'usihim

Maleficent: enlevez leur têtes

(In Auradon. Mal bursts into her and Evie’s room close to tears)

Mal: something just happened. Something. I know know if it’s good or bad but it’s something and that something terrifies me

(Evie’s clutching her desk. She looks white as a sheet. She looks like she’s about to throw up)

Evie (barely above a whisker): go. Now. Go. Please

Mal (stubbornly): my room as well. And I wanna talk.

Evie: I SAID GO!!!!

(The glass in the vanity mirror explodes and heads for Mal’s face intending to cut her to ribbons. Mal turns it to sand before it can reach her)

Mal: you know better than to do that indigo

(The windows broken by a twisted vine that wraps itself around Evie. This is when Jay comes in and disappears both the sand and vines leaving the girls still looking ready to kill each other)

Jay: ok what the fuck. You were getting along so well. Honestly this is sort of preferable. But why. What happened this time to set you into melee mode?

(The sisters rotten screech and rant over each other until jay manages to shush them both)

Jay: right. Mal first

Mal: I think I almost kissed the prince

(Evie sits down. Jay’s jaw hits the floor)

Mal: well the pair of you needn’t look so surprised

Evie: I told him. No. Not the time. You kissed him or he kissed you

Mal: myeh-myeh

Evie: what now?

Jay: I think you broke her brain. What happened after Carlos and me left?

Mal: Evie yelled at Lonnie cause of chad I thought Ben had black blood went mothery on him almost planted one on his unfairly cute face next thing you know Nasira’s you’re aunt and I’m throttling my sister with thorn vines

(The other two blink)

Evie: I can explain. That idiotic commoner told me

Jay: yeah yeah don’t care. Lonnie’s a good friend Chad’s an ass go for Doug. Now when you say “planted one”. Do you mean romcom or kids cartoon

Mal: there’s a difference?

Jay: hells yeah there’s a difference. Kids cartoons a short and pg. Romcoms. Are not.

Mal: the-the-the-then rom...com?

(Jay cheers loudly and punches the air. Then stops)

Jay: wait. When you say “almost”?

Mal: I stopped myself. We may or may not have danced. Then I ran out of there

Jay: oh good god it’s like a sitcom

Mal: nothing about this is funny. I. Cannot. Get sucked in

Jay: why?

Mal: because

Evie: oh my god. You’re scared. The big. Bad dragons daughter. Is scared. Of a pretty face

Jay (sending danger): ohhhh kay. Why don’t we just take a breather

Mal: I’d much rather bash a water jug over her head.

Evie: can we talk about me now?

Jay (long suffering sigh): fine. What did Lonnie say.

Evie: same thing Doug and Ben said. That Chad’s a user. That he’ll dump me when he’s bored. But she’s lying

Jay: I don’t think she was. And I don’t think you thought she was lying either

Evie: she has to be.

Mal: she wasn’t and you know it. We can read minds, remember?

Evie: yeah but

Jay (kindly) Mal (not so kindly): Lonnie wasn’t lying

(Evie goes into the bathroom to cry)

(Meanwhile, Audrey’s pacing the floor of fairy godmothers office mad as all hell)

Audrey: it’s disgusting the way those backwards circus freaks leech off him. He’s too nice to say it but I can tell he’s annoyed by them. And who wouldn’t be. Those things are barely with a first look. We should all just dump them back where they (there’s a knock at the door) OH WHAT?!?!

Doug: fairy godmother asked to see me before curfew. Something about my report card?

Fairy Godmother (glad for an excuse to be rid of Audrey for at least a couple of moments): yes! Yes. Last semesters report card. It got lost just before the break and I recovered it today. I thought we could video chat your father

Doug: sure

Fairy Godmother (under her her breath): oh thank goodness. (Regular volume) Audrey I’m so sorry dear. Well have to continue this chat tomorrow

Audrey: I’m not done

Fairy Godmother: well I am. I’m sorry dear but you have got to stop this smear campaign against Mal and her friends. It’s not nice. It’s not healthy. And it will not end well for you

Audrey: I don’t care. I’m not gonna rest until Ben sees they’re heinous villains. I’m not going to rest until that damned pixie that witch that unmanacled djinn and that freckled face fa

Fairy Godmother and Doug (absolutely incensed): AUDREY!!!!

Audrey (genuinely ignorant of what she said): what

Fairy Godmother: we do not use those words here. We have a zero tolerance policy for those types of slurs

Audrey: what slurs. It’s what they are. It’s technical terms.

Fairy Godmother: you do not use those words if you wish to continue to attend this school. Doug. I am so sorry. A rather urgent matter Amiga’s materialised. I hope we can continue this tomorrow. Audrey I’m calling your parents. You have break lunch and after school detention for the next month until family day. I am going to call your parents and give them a detailed rundown of your horrible behaviour

Audrey: my parents are in Malta until the 24 hours before family day. They’re coming down for the event. Grammy’s available

Fairy Godmother (visibly deflating): ah. You still have detention. And are required to apologise to Mal Jay Carlos and Evie for your frankly despicable actions

(Audrey pompously turns on her heel and leaves. Bumping into Ben in the doorway. He looks shocked and terrified)

Audrey: oh hey benny boo. So I was thinking when this madness is over we could

Ben (robotically): I uh I I need to speak to Doug

Doug: um fairy godmother. I need to help Ben. Training for my future employment and all that

Fairy Godmother (absolutely no idea of what’s happening): of course

Doug: c’mon Ben

(He leads the prince the back to his bedroom. Where Ben promptly starts hyperventilating)

Ben: I can’t. I can’t beli. She. How. How could she. I can’t tell them not now.

Doug: breathe. You’ll be ok

Ben: she’s wrong. She has to be wrong. Nobody’s fully rotten to the core. Are they?

Doug: buddy she doesn’t care. All she knows is that now they’re here. She’s not important anymore. And she’s doing what ever she can to make herself feel important again. And she doesn’t care who she hurts to get it

Ben: but she wouldn’t cross a line

Doug: when we were six she got her nanny fired because she said and I quote “nanny Mavis didn’t tell the tooth fairy about my incisors”. And she’s the one who locked you and Jane in the wardrobe when we were eleven

Ben (face in his hands): oh god we were in there for two hours. We had to get our braces rewired. A whole week of school spent in a hospital bed

Doug (sarcastically): sure. That’s what’s wrong with the situation she put you in. Not the fact she’s a jealous cow

Ben: anyway. Enough about me. What’s up with you

Doug: nothing. Need to show my dad last semesters report but otherwise peachy keen. Why do you ask

Ben: because I see your face whenever Evie mentions Chad

Doug: she chose chad. There’s nothing I can do even if I wanted to. Which I don’t. Can’t change her mind.

Ben: yeah. But you’re still upset.

Doug: This isn’t about me. This is about Evie. And chad. And the fact he is going to emotionally destroy her and they shouldn’t happen to anyone.

Ben (smiling knowingly): you love her

Doug: I’m sorry who has the hots for the daughter of Maleficent?

Ben: guilty as charged. But still.

Doug and Ben: we cant make them fall for us

Ben: I think Mal might like me though

Doug: lemme gues. The pen thing almost led to the inevitable kiss. Then she ran. Am I right?

Ben: yes. And how many people know about the pen thing?

Doug: well Lonnie managed to keep four people quiet that I know about. So probably everyone in our grade barring Mal and her friends

Ben: not what I had in mind for my first scandal but it could be worse I suppose

Doug (incredulous): you’re PLANNING your scandals?

Ben: I’m almost sixteen. I’m going to be king. People can be very unkind. So I may as well try to rein in some measure of control over what gets out

Doug (smiling sadly): if anyone ever tries to take that light from your eyes Lonnie and I are gonna beat their asses to death

Ben: please don’t. Nobody should ever get hurt because of me

Doug: well. Lonnie could give saint Spinelli a run for her money when she gets going. And I’ve been known to bite. But I won’t seeing as you asked so nicely. I cannot vouch for Lonnie though

Ben: of course.

Doug: you’ve still got some er (he rubs his bottom lip)

Ben: oh! Eh heh heh (he wipes his mouth)

(Back at the sisters room. Carlos has wandered in half asleep and confused)

Carps (yawning in Jay’s spare tourney jersey): whassapening?

Evie: you’ve got a new papa

Carlos: huh

Mal: don’t confuse him indigo. I almost kissed Ben C

Carlos: wha?

Jay: we can talk about it tomorrow.

Carlos (pouting): I woke up and you were gone

Jay: I’m sorry buddy. They were fighting

Carlos (rounding on the other two): you know not to fight after I’m asleep

Mal: I’m so sorry C. It will never happen again.

Jay (scooping Carlos up): c’mon buddy. Let’s get you back to sleep

Carlos: leave again I’ll turn into a boa constrictor

Jay (chuckling): I don’t doubt that

(Jay carries him out of the room)

Evie: sit down. This time we have

Mal: no. Nope. Absolutely not. No girl talk

Evie: too late! You wanna hold him

Mal: I swear. If you quote shrek at me

Evie: ok. Ok. Seriously though. How do you feel?

Mal: rotten. And not in a good way

Evie: why

Mal: look at Ben. Then look at me

Evie: well Ben does have fashion sense

(Mal kicks Evie out of the chair)

Evie: great. Now I have your boot print in my kidney

Mal: well Carlos wanted us to be closer as sisters

Evie: well yay him. Anyway. If you like him

(In the princes bedroom)

Ben: why don’t you just go and tell her

Doug: because

(Girls room)

Evie: because why?

(Ben’s room)

Doug: because

Ben and Evie (in split screen): because why

Doug and Mal: because I’m not god enough

(The friends look at them in sympathy)

Doug and Mal: it’s. It’s not how it’s done.

Doug: I am not

Mal: the one he

Mal and Doug: needs

Mal: and I wasn’t raised for it.

Ben: you know you can talk to me right?

Doug: yeah I know

(Girls room)

Evie: then talk to me

(This is when “heart attacks” happens)

[mainly-kpop]

Kappa Beta part 5

Final 

You know what that means lads. VIAGRA SERIES IS ON ITS WAY. 

thank you for all the love on this series, i cant wait for yall to read the next one <3

She straightened out her dress knowing this was a bad idea, that she was 100% being set up right now. Did he know? Was he even aware of anything going on around him? God why would he be, it’s not as if she made it obvious. Letting his whole frat house dick her down probably wasn’t the best way to say “hey you’re really cute, let’s date!” If punching herself in the face was an option right now, it’s one she would accept with open arms.

‘And are you sure everyone will be there?’ She questioned, one last time for good measure. Lara rolled her eyes, overtly sick of all these damn questions. In reality she knew she would be alone with him, she could see it in her best friends eyes. She was a shady bitch, but one terrible liar, especially towards her.

‘YES, 100%, I promise everyone will be together tonight.’ Technically that wasn’t a lie, nor was it the whole truth. Lara was finally meeting the boys tonight, Jimin excluded, but the boys all the same. She looked at her skeptically trying to find a lie, unable to fine the wavering she shrugged grabbing her purse.

‘Fine, let’s go then!’ She chirped, grabbing Lara’s hand, staying rooted to the spot she shook her head, causing a frown to form on the latter’s face.

‘Yea, no. Look at me, I am no where NEAR ready to meet these men!! You go ahead, I’ll text you when I’m on my way.’ She replied, easily letting the bullshit fall out her mouth. Frowning she shrugged, muttering a small ‘well okay…’ before exiting the house. Lara slipped down onto the couch sighing with relief texting the boys.

‘She’s on her way, get out of there now!’ She got a few emojis in response, confirming they were making their exit before locking her phone and chuckling to herself.

‘JIMIN, WE ARE GOING OUT TO GET STUFF FOR TONIGHT! WANT ANYTHING?!’ He rolled his eyes, looking exasperatedly at his door.

‘NO JUNGKOOK, AND HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THIS, stop screaming on the other side of my door. It ain’t that thick dude.’ He spoke, swinging the door open glaring at the taller boy.

‘Oh I just thought maybe YOU thought it was thicker.’ He spoke, smirking. He didn’t want to ask, but curiosity killed the cat and all that shit.

‘Why would I think that Kook?’ Pushing his hair back with his hand, he sighed. Jungkooks smirk still plastered on his perfect fucking face.

‘Just how loud you are, you know. Do you always think of Y/N or is that just nights you want to-‘

‘FUCK OFF JUNGLECOCK!’ He screamed, slamming the door in the younger boys face, sometimes he really couldn’t stand living here.

Yes he really liked this girl, fuck ever since she sat down on that couch, all bashful and shy, he had a thing for her. All the boys talked about destroying her, about wanting to fuck her until the only word she knew was their name. Not Jimin, he wanted to take care of her, to cuddle and watch movies. He wanted to go to parties and look for her in a crowd, he wanted her and only her. Sensing she had different plans however, he stayed out of her way, making sure that whatever she wanted she got. Whether it was him or not.

He recalls vividly Hobi talking about fucking her, his brags about how well she took him, how amazing she felt around him. Jin’s brag quickly after that of ‘You’re not the only one who got her yesterday’ making all them groan in want. He remembered Namjoon entering the living room, followed closely by Jungkook, talking about how much fun they had. How they hadn’t expected to enjoy a threesome with each other so much. About how rough they had been, about how well she took it all. By this point he was angry, watching everyone else get a go, and not him.

For a while he questioned if it was him that she didn’t want, but then she had come over recently, and never went to bed with anyone. That gave him comfort, that maybe you just didn’t want that anymore. Then he came home that night, all the boys crowded around Tae and Yoongi, begging for details, juicy details. They turned around to him, pity on their features, he was the last one. The only one left, and judging by your lack of attention towards him. It would never happen.

SO like any normal boy, with a bruised ego and a pained heart, he did what he knew best. Burying his dick in the prettiest thing that looked his way and avoiding her at all costs. Truthfully it wasn’t the smartest idea, but it helped for a while. That was before every face he looked at he saw her, every smile was dull compared to what he remembered of hers. Every moan, or groan, every whimper they made, there was no way it was near what he imagined hers being.

A swift knock at the front door brought him out of his thoughts, he didn’t know how long he had been sitting there so he assumed it was one of the boys.

‘What did you forget Nam-‘ He stopped his sentence, taking in her appearance. She was dressed for a party, he would give her that. Her hair was done to perfection, not a hair out of place, flowing in curls down her back. Her make up looked, yeah, to be honest Jimin didn’t know much about that, he just knew she looked fucking amazing. The tight black dress she picked hugged her body, stopping mid thigh, he couldn’t stop his eyes trailing the length of her legs settling on some sneakers.

‘Smart casual, they’re also comfy.’ She spoke, fearing she was being judged, she couldn’t see why he would be though considering he was in a hoodie and sweats.

‘Na it looks hot- I mean I’m hot, are you hot?, It’s hot in here wow.’ He stuttered, rubbing the back of his neck, she giggled watching him curiously.

‘Can I?’

‘Oh shit yeah, sorry!’ He fumbled once again, stepping to the side. How had he not thought to let the fucking girl inside.

‘So where is everyone?’ She questioned curiously, they said they would be in? Jimin shrugged, not knowing the time or anything.

‘I’m not sure, they popped out about half 6 maybe? Said they would be back soon.’ She sighed. She knew this was a fucking set up.

‘Jimin, its half seven, they aren’t coming back, well not tonight at least.’ She sounded disappointed, he couldn’t help but wonder if she was that sad when he wasn’t here. The times she showed up and he was no where in sight. He wondered if she was this upset when it was him. Not them.

‘God I should just go, I’m sorry for-‘

‘Why? You don’t have to leave because it’s just me.’ He whispered, she could hear the hurt in his voice. She looked at what she could see of his face, he looked upset. Why was he so sad when it’s him that’s avoiding her?

‘Jimin it’s not like that.’ She stated, sitting back on the couch she had raised her body from, as soon as she knew this was a set up. He turned his face to look at her, eyes hopeful and inviting, god he was so beautiful.

‘Then what is it like?’ He questioned, curious and ever so slightly ticked off.

‘I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, you seem to avoid me.’ Eyes popping out his head, he shook it violently. Yes it was sad the speed he replied, but he didn’t want her to feel like he was avoiding her.

‘Oh god no, I couldn’t, I would never. I just-god how do I explain this without sounding like an idiot?’ The question, directed at himself, was answered by her anyways.

‘From the heart Jimin, tell me how you’re feeling.’ She soothed, placing her hand gently on top of his, rubbing soothing circles. The motion was made to sooth, to calm, but all he could think about was how close their bodies were. How the length of her legs were incredible, how their knees were touching. How this was the closest he’d been to you since that night, that started it all.

‘I uh, I’m technically avoiding you yes, BUT NOT FOR THE REASONS YOU THINK, god I’m so bad at this, you look so pretty tonight.’ He babbled, blushing slightly. She smiled tucking a stray hair behind her ear, thanking him under her breath, urging him to continue.

‘I like you, like more than just wanting to have sex with you. I avoided you because I didn’t want to be like the others, but then you never even tried with me so I just assumed…’ trailing off he replayed the confession in his head, yeah that sounded coherent. She smirked, letting out a little snort like laugh, he looked up quickly confused at her reaction.

‘Jimin you idiot boy, I wasn’t avoiding you because I didn’t want you. Lord knows I wanted you, but I wanted you as more, like you’re saying I never wanted just sex from you. You never seemed down to do anything, the others were so…’ They looked at each other in stark silence for a moment before both giggling, she fell into his body sighing and trying to calm down.

‘Idiots, the both of us!’ He exclaimed, wrapping his arm tightly around her body. He rubbed his thumb along her shoulder, causing her to relax into him slightly more. She smiled breathing in his aftershave, snuggling in closer.

‘You can say that again.’ She hummed, wrapping her arm around his waist. Planting a small kiss on the top of her head, he smiled content to a certain extent.

‘So, what do we do now?’ They turned to each other, she considered the question for a moment before a sparkle danced in her eyes.

‘I can think of a couple things…’ She murmured, pressing herself closer to his body, fingers trailing up his torso resting gently on his shoulder.

‘Oh really and what are those?’ He questioned, already knowing where this was leading. He pushed his body into hers, she lay back going with the motions. Body hovered over hers, he pushed her thin strap down her shoulder, leaving it completely bare and open to him.

‘We could watch a movie, maybe order some take out?’

‘Oh, that sounds promising, a little boring though.’ He replied, planting sweet little kisses on her cheek. As he reached her jaw and neck the kisses became more hungry, nibbling and nipping between kisses.

‘Okay, maybe you’re right, we could go for a nap? I hear that’s a thing people do these days.’ His lips smashed against hers, in a hungry and heated kiss. The months of avoiding each other, staying far away all coming down to this moment.

‘That sounds good, one problem. This isn’t really a bedroom setting, the boys could come home and disturb our nap.’ He whispered through kisses, pushing her dress up her hips. She moaned into the kiss, feeling his hands trailing up her body, gripping everything in his path.

‘We could move, to the bedroom I mean.’ He cocked his eyebrow, fiddling with the hem of her panties.

‘Would you want that baby? The bedroom instead?’ He queried, voice huskier and deeper than before, she bit her lip jerking her hips into his crotch.

‘Fuck no.’ She gasped, slamming her lips onto his one more time. He yanked her panties down her legs, the cold air hitting her wetness, breath stuttering in her throat. His fingers traced up her inner thigh, sparking goosebumps in their way. His finger finally reached where she needed him, gasp pouring out her mouth. He chuckled seeing her already so pent up, ripping open the top of her dress her breasts bounced free.

‘This was one of my favourite dresses.’ She pouted, looking down at the now destroyed item of clothing.

‘I’ll buy you a new one baby, a better one, a sexier one.’ He smirked, pushing a finger ever so gently inside of her, she whined at the feeling reaching out to grab his shoulders. Lowering his head, he sucked one of her nipples into his mouth, enjoying the low groaning noise she makes.

‘Jimin, fuck just fuck me please.’ She wanted foreplay, she really wanted it damn, but she was far more desperate to feel him. To feel what she had been missing. He moaned in her ear, not expecting to hear her say it that fast, yet he was so turned on he couldn’t say no. Even if he wanted to.

He stood up, pulling his trousers and boxers down his legs, sitting down on the couch. Patting his thighs he let her know exactly what he wanted. She smirked standing up, slipping herself out of the dress, kicking it to the side. Like it would matter that shit was destroyed. Sauntering over to him, she slipped her knees on either side of his legs scooting so their chests pushed against each other.

‘We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.’ She whispered onto his lips. It was weird for her, to have the tables turned so suddenly. For her to be saying they could stop, it made her smile, lips still pressed against his.

‘I want to, fuck I want to.’ He whined against her lips, gripping her hips tighter, forcing her to grind or move or something. She nodded lightly, kissing his lips one last time before wrapping her hand around his dick, pumping gently a couple of times. He moaned, throwing his head back, looking down at her, eyelids half closed. The gaze was penetrative, causing a shiver to glide down her spine. Slipping her thumb quickly across the top of his cock, gathering some pre cum before lifting her hips and slipping down on him. She placed her finger in her mouth, sucking off the pre cum but keeping direct eye contact the whole time.

‘You’re such a tease, you know that?’ He gasped, feeling her clenching around him. She smiled cheekily, nodding in reply. He placed his hands gently on her hips, urging her to move herself on him. She bit her lip raising her hips slightly, sinking back down letting a groan out.

‘Fuck baby, you feel so good.’ He grunted, helping her move her hips up and down, thrusting up to meet her half way. She let out short moans, breathless, holding her boobs as they bounce with each thrust.

‘Fuck Jimin, harder oh my god!’ She screamed, feeling like she was balanced on the edge, needing a hard push. He let a low guttural groan vibrate his chest before flipping their bodies around, her now lying on the couch. This position let him thrust harder and faster into her, hitting her sweet spot every damn time. She trailed her nails down his back, practically screaming for him at this point. His hand slipped between their bodies, seeking out her clit quickly. Feeling close himself, he needed to push her over the edge before he came.

‘Fuck, Jimin, I’m, fuck!’ She screamed, pushing his hips tighter into hers with her feet. She came with nothing but a breathless whimper, back arching and convulsing against him. As she clenched around him he came too, the feeling pushing him that little bit further over the edge. His body collapsed on top of hers, she giggled at his sweaty body pressed against hers, running her hand soothingly through his hair.

‘we should get off this couch before they come home.’ She whispered a while after, both of them completely down from their highs. He sighed, agreeing, pulling out slowly he helped her stand, both heading to the bathroom and then to bed.

‘So do we date now?’ He asked awkwardly, tracing circles into her stomach. She hummed, petting his hair.

‘I’d hope so, I did just confess my attraction to you.’ She chuckled, causing Jimin to poke at her sides.

‘Don’t be cheeky, it’s not too early for me to break up with you!’ She gasped pushing him off, folding her arms in mock anger.

‘Ah, baby don’t be like that, you know I want you.’ He whispered, crawling on top of her body nibbling gently at her earlobe.

‘Hmm and how do I know that?’ She countered, trailing her hands over his body anyways.

‘I’m sure I can think of a few ways…’ He answered, slipping his hands slowly between their bodies.

‘Okay, 20 bucks says they didn’t fuck.’ Jungkook whispered as they walked through the living room. Namjoon picked up an item of clothing from the floor, holding it up for the boys. The top half ripped completely, all of them smirking.

‘You might want to rethink that bet Kookie…’ Yoongi replied, smirking at the ruined dress.

[thisisabouta]

This is About a... Downfall.

It’s happening. I’ve been taking Lamotrigine consistently for 8 months or so. Maybe longer. This is the longest i’ve consistently taken medication in a long time. It’s Lamotrigine along with Doxepin, Hydroxyzine and Gabapentin.

This is where my head has been during these last 8 or so months. I was driving on the freeway, about to merge and as I saw my car getting closer to the concrete barrier, I decided to go faster instead of slowing down for the car that had the right a way. I was about to crash into the side of this fucking car but I just kept going. The car to my right had to slam their brakes and I waited to hear the loud crash from the cars behind them because there was no way this wasn’t about to be a 5 car pile up.

God was there because nothing happened but that was way too fucking close to a catastrophe. The car that I cut off trailed me for awhile and pulled up next to me, I’m sure they were trying to cuss me out, flip me off, something... Whatever they did, I didn’t see it but it was justified. I would’ve been fucking heated if it had been the other way around. I cut people off all the time. I drive like an asshole, whatever. This was different.

I’ve been disassociating for weeks now. In that moment, I could see everything that was happening but my brain was not telling my body the correct way to react. I knew to slow down but I couldn’t. Everything i’ve been doing lately has had a delay. 1 minute. 5 minute. 10 minutes. My processing is delayed. My speech stumbles out of my mouth and doesn’t make sense. I’ve been blacking out and losing moments of time for years now but not to this severity. Now it’s like i’m blacking out and not fully coming back from it.

I’m around people constantly. I’m in a position of “leadership” at work so I have to direct and plan, be on alert at all times. My work day now consists of getting asked questions that I can’t comprehend fast enough so I stand there with a blank stare on my face, slowly losing my credibility. It’s worse because some of the things i’m being asked, I absolutely know the answer to but my brain just cannot get there. I can’t focus on ANYTHING. I know i’m walking around in circles (literally) and I know other people see it but I can’t stop. This circling shit happens a lot but it’s picked up in frequency. After I realize what i’m doing, it’s already done. People are trying to get my input and ideas and all I can do is squeeze my hands together and stare straight ahead, hoping my brain will figure out that I need it to work.

When I try to read, I can’t. This isn’t all the time but it happening occasionally is already too much. Words are not always making sense to me. I cant understand what i’m seeing and I have to go over things multiple times. It’s the same with counting. I shouldn’t have to use a calculator to add 30 and 20 or hold five $5 bills in front of me and stare at them until I realize what it is that i’m looking at. It’s embarrassing to even acknowledge that this is happening.

I’ve been losing things more and more everyday. I’ve had a habit of losing my keys. I lost my work keys at my last job, three times. My new job, i’ve already lost my keys once and it hasn’t even been 2 months that i’ve been working there. When my coworker texted me telling me that she found them, I just wanted to cry. That sounds ridiculous but having those keys is a huge fucking responsibility. I can get fired for losing them. Somehow I escaped that at my last job but it was a constant fear that I had. This last time, I hadn’t used the keys at all that day and I still managed to lose them. I retraced my steps and I had not taken them off of my keychain. Things like that don’t help me overcome this engrained idea I have that the universe is against me. Those keys represent me trying to do everything I can to keep it together while everything still managing to fall apart.

I’ve been forgetting to pay bills that i’ve been paying on the same day, every month for years. I’ve been forgetting people’s names. I can’t always comprehend what people are saying when they’re talking to me... that’s been a big one. I had a customer walk to my register at work. I was looking down at something when he asked if he could pay for his merchandise (I found out later on). That’s not what I heard. It came out as mumbling so I just assumed he was making a comment about something that was left on the counter. From what I remember, I said “Oh... yeah...” and went back to what I was doing. He looked at the Associate next to me and she told him that there were registers at the front where he could pay (she was already helping someone). He walked to the front and it took me about 2 or 3 minutes to realize that he was asking if I could ring him up. And to add to that awesome moment, he glared at me for the rest of the time he was in the fucking store. Yes, one small incident but that’s nowhere near how many times something like that has happened. Someone will be talking to me and i’m literally catching about every third word they’re saying. You can only ask “what?” so many times before that person looks at you like you’re the dumbest person they’ve ever met.

Writing things down... i’ll go back and read over my notes. They make no sense. Things are spelled incorrectly. Everything’s scattered. Like someone else wrote it. I walk around feeling like i’m not apart of my surroundings. My surroundings are not reality, like walking through a Fun House with no fun in sight. It’s like i’m seeing everything in those mirrors that make everything look distorted. All I can do is stare and try to figure it out. I can only imagine what that looks like from the outside. People walking around me while I just stare. Standing there trying not to cry because i’m in public.

I’ve been hallucinating. That comes and goes. I’m still forgetting why I picked certain things up, or why I walked to a certain room or what I was going to tell someone. Things a lot of people do but usually with somewhat immediate recall. I’m not remembering these things til days later, if at all. That’s the more frustrating part. Very small, seemingly insignificant things are happening over and over and over again. It’s no longer an insignificant mishap, this shit is snowballing and affecting everything. I can’t manage a store if I can’t function like a normal, fucking human being. I talked to my Probation Officer about some of the things that were happening and she asked me what medications I was taking and if any of them were used to treat seizures. Gave her the list and two of them just so happen to be used to treat seizures. I already knew that was the case but didn’t think that they would cause this long, intense stream of side effects. I know all about the side effects of medicine. You’ll basically die if you take it and die if you don’t.

I’ve experienced the lighter ones. Nausea, dizziness, dry mouth. The usual shit. Not forgetting how to read a fucking sentence. To my POs knowledge, those drugs do cause a lot of neurological problems, much that make it feel like i’m disassociating. Most of these things had been happening prior to taking the medications but it got much worse over time. I read up on the side effects in detail when I got home and everything aligned. So [because I will control this situation as much as I possibly can] I stopped taking the two that were the main issue. Should anyone ever just stop taking their medicine without consulting their physician first? No. Did I do it anyway? Yes. Now i’m going thru the withdrawal. Besides me losing my fucking mind, the Lamotrigine was actually working. It was the first medication I had taken for my Bipolar that has ever had that positive of an effect on me. But that was at the expense of me literally going insane. It’s not going to matter if I feel better when i’m dead because I crashed my car into a wall. The risk does not outweigh the reward. It did not cure anything. It did not solve even half of my problems but it did make me feel better. Not taking the Gabapentin doesn’t make a difference.

Now i’m going thru the withdrawal. I have 11 drafts on here that i’ve tried to complete and publish over the past few months and they’re just sitting in there. I know the only reason i’m able to write this one is because i’m not on the meds right now. Now my heart hasn’t felt off beat for the past few days (that’s a difficult feeling to describe) but in return, i’m the angriest i’ve been in awhile. I got in an argument with one of my employees this morning and did not feel bad at all. I got into it with another ASM a few days ago. I feel my temper coming back.

I made an appointment with a new MD for next week. I need to start over. I made an appointment to see my current Psychiatrist and cancelled it. I’m done with that guy. He keeps throwing these random pills at me and it’s not working. Not that the next doctor isn’t going to do the same, exact thing but I made an appointment at a facility that offers “Advanced Integrative Medical Care”. Basically, they’re on some new age shit. I’ve been reading up on Ketamine Therapy for over a year and even though it scares the shit out of me, i’m not completely against the idea. They also offer Medical Marijuana. I am officially now in my last 3 month stretch of my house arrest and this shit has finally gotten difficult. The first few weeks were hard because I was still trying to figure out what I could get away with and apparently it’s a lot but now, I just need this shit to end. I’m getting restless. I’m scared too tho.

I’m still going to be on supervised probation for a year (based on good behavior) but I need to get back to... something. I can’t be sober and I don’t want to be. Weed has been fine. Good, enough. I’ve grown a liking to it and found some that actually relaxes me. Alcohol. I miss alcohol. I’ll forever miss alcohol. I’ll miss it even if (when) I start drinking again. It’s that important. Watching movies, seeing people drink to have fun, to relax, to be brave, to socialize. And yet, I shouldn’t engage in that. I know I can engage in good things but the drinking is what i’ve been told I should stay away from. I’m not going to stay away from it. Alcohol makes things better. I know it, the people who tell me not to drink know it. It’s there and I need it. Yes, the problem is that I abuse it. I don’t know if I can overcome that problem. I’m going to try. That sounds crazy and insane so... it’s just going to have to be crazy and insane.

There are other ways to deal with my problems and i’m trying to implement them and hang onto them. I need those things too but I can’t walk thru the world with this open wound that is my life, unarmed. Chemicals... drugs... my brain chemistry will never be right and if I know there’s something out there that will give me temporary relief, i’m taking it. I just have to put the recklessness aside. This time around was a lot. I pray that it was enough to set me straight. Or at least to keep me out of jail for the second time.

[proheromidoriyashouto]

Inksignia, Beyond Alteo - Tattoo artist!Inko x Flower Shop Owner!Rei AU with pre-IzuShou Part 1

Canon is mostly the same with a few exceptions. Izuku immediately tells the teachers what Shouto said during the Sports Festival. Trust is broken but Izuku would rather have him alive and safe than continue to leave him in that house. The teachers - Eraserhead, All Might and Nighteye mostly- investigate and Endeavor is taken down, goes to jail, blah, blah, blah he’s not important. After careful consideration, the authorities tentatively release Todoroki Rei from the mental hospital as an out-patient.

In order to gain independence from his estate, she decides to start up a flower shop for income. So much time spent in that drab, stale hospital has fostered a desire for bright colors and the scents of nature. She uses some of her monetary award to pay off the rent for a space wedged between a smaller convenience store and a tattoo shop. The tattoo shop has dark-tinted windows with intricate, black detailing that creates a black-on-black appearance Rei recalls seeing on pottery in the States a lifetime ago. The tattoo shop opens and closes later than her own flower shop so she goes a few weeks before she makes contact with the owner.

Business starts off slowly as there are more renowned shops a short drive away but Rei creates a niche for herself by exclusively offering carnivorous plants, and freeze-drying flowers. She had a lot of time to read and explore her tastes with a decade apart from Enji and she developed a fascination with carnivorous plants. Beautiful, deadly, and deceptively delicate, they require the utmost care. Preserving flowers by freezing them was a past-time of hers prior to her marriage and she is delighting to pick it up again. It was an uncommon practice then and continues to be so now. She uses her quirk to frost the vases and keep that part of the shop cool without altering the temperature necessary by the tropical plants. Soon enough she has moderate, steady business and she’s finally beginning to turn over a profit.

She’s returning from lunch when she spots Shouto shuffling about outside. He visits her here since her release or at her apartment above the shop so being outside must mean he was waiting for her. He looks despondent when she guides him inside and he spends nearly an hour simply walking through the shop, familiarizing himself with her wares. Even after all this time she call tell something has upset him, though he undoubtedly has a lot on his mind after the Hosu Incident. Though when he came to visit after the Sports Festival and again since the investigation into her ex-husband he had been angry about something then too. He’ll speak when he’s ready so she helps a few patrons with their orders in the meantime and when he does he seems... lost.

Mama?

Yes, dear?

Are you... happy... with all of this?

...How do you mean?

I... He visibly swallowed around a lump in his throat. H-his arrest. The court proceedings, the media attention, public opinion. Doesn’t it... bother you? Make you uncomfortable? I passed by people on the way here who were whispering about you and all of us, how we’re ungrateful and-! Validating the things people like Stain say about heroes and society. Is this, he kept his eyes firmly downcast, all even worth reliving that pain? Wouldn’t you rather forget it?

S-shouto?

I’m not saying this isn’t a good thing, now, but wouldn’t have been better to let sleeping dogs lie? I... I was going to save you from that place. When I made it and he couldn’t control me or you anymore, I-I had a plan, but...

But? She approached him slowly, letting him gather his thoughts. Something changed that? She could see the tips of his ears flush though she couldn’t see his face for his hair.

I told someone. He almost growled at that taking her by surprise. He told the teachers. That’s when they started looking into it. His fists were clenched at his sides in his hurt. I just needed him to understand what- I didn’t think he’d say anything. I didn’t know him. We’d never spoken before but he was always butting his nose into things... I didn’t think he’d hang us out to dry. But he did and now. He lifted his head to look her in the eye. His expression was imploring, desperate maybe. Being dragged through court and forced to relive all those horrible things and having people think less of you for it.You- you can’t tell me it’s made you happy.

She considered his words carefully. No. No, that certainly wasn’t. Having to testify, being in the same room as your father. That was... never something I wanted to experience again.

He adopted a look that was equal parts relief and... vindication? But she continued.

But I would do it again in a heartbeat.

His expression became clear shock then. Why?

Shouto, where do you live now? She asked instead of answering.

...with Fuyumi?

Are you happy with her?

Yes.

Do you feel safe there?

He tilted his head to the side, reminiscent of an inquisitive puppy. So cute her son. ...Yes.

And you know that your father will never come near you again, right?

...Yeah.

So, my sweet boy, who I know is so so smart, She gently cupped his face in her hands and kept his eyes on her own, why wouldn’t I repeat this fight if it meant getting you and your siblings here, to this safe, happy place every time?

His eyes shined with tears.

For the record, she said, I am. Happy- that is- here. And however unintentional, I’m grateful that you told that boy. Her son’s eyes widened. He set us on this path. It was painful, yes. She tucked an errant lock of crimson hair behind is ear. It was also the road to freedom. For all of us.

Tears wet her fingers and Shouto looked away in shame. Oh. He said so softly. You- it- it doesn’t... you mean that?

She nodded fervently. Absolutely. I would thank him if I saw him.

Shouto drew his shoulders up tensely and gently pulled her hands away from his face. That... I’m not sure that’ll ever happen.

She hummed curiously. Has he requested to remain anonymous?

No, I-I thought you were hurt by all of this. I, um. He curled in on himself a bit. I was angry. I... told him off after they started looking into our lives. ...we aren’t talking.

Oh. Shouto. You were worried about my feelings? She would remain amazed by his capacity to love her after what she’d done to him.

He nodded.

Could you make up? I’d hate for him to think he didn’t do the right thing. He might not come forward for someone else if the situation arises. I’d hate to think that someone else if left in suffering over this.

He seemed to shrink in on himself even more. The- the things I said to him were, um, pretty personal. His face twisted in obvious shame. Someone else told me- a bully of his told me that he was... I said a lot of horrible things to him and he won’t even look at me anymore. Before, I was glad. But you’re- you’re happy. He said the last word as though it a ludicrous notion.

She nodded.

Now, I- I don’t know. I should apologize. Looking back it was going too far. He didn’t mean to hurt you by it. Or me. Or any of us. He’s just... I think he’s just like that. So helpful.

She smiled. He sounds nice.

Yeah. His voice cracked as he blinked away more tears. His right hand reached over to cover the knife wounds on his left arm. They were weeks old, maybe they were still causing him pain? Too nice. ...I don’t think he’ll want to talk to me. His voice dropped to a nearly inaudible whisper, a few more silent tears slipping down his face unbidden. ...I made him cry.

Would it hurt to try?

They spent the rest of the day discussing how to go about making amends, and ended up staying well-past the typical closing time. It’s dark out by the time they head out to pick up dinner. She finally has enough money to take the children out for food and Fuyumi and Natsuo said they would meet up at the restaurant. It’s been such a long time since she had a warm meal with her babies. She’s excited. They can finally get to being a real family.

They’re surprised by the door to Inksignia suddenly swinging open, bathing the street in light. A woman stepped out and she blinked large eyes at them. She was short and chubby with green hair and eyes, wearing a black dress with sheer lace revealing colorful patterns on her shoulders, chest, and back without appearing risque. Her arms, neck, and legs were conspicuously bare of tattoos. She carried herself like someone comfortable in their own skin. Surreal.

Oh! Hello! She offered them a smile. Didn’t see you there. Her green eyes drifted over Rei’s apron. She’s forgotten to take it off. You work right here at Beyond Alteo?

No worries. Yes, I’m the owner actually. I’m, uh, Rei. Just Rei.

Ah, how rude of me, I didn’t introduce myself. I’m Midoriya Inko, nice to meet you. Her round face was soft and welcoming. This is my parlor. She said proudly.

Midoriya? Shouto blurted out suddenly, eyes wide.

Hm? Yes. Inko turned to him. Do I- oh. You’re him. She narrowed her eyes in recognition. Todoroki Shouto-kun. You fought my son during the Sports Festival.

Y-yeah, I did. Shouto looked nervous. Understandable. Rei had watched the fight after all. A seed of suspicion before to take root in her chest. If it had been her son injured in their match...

Are you alright? Inko asked to their surprise.

I- I’m okay.

I heard about Hosu. Are you healed properly? Have you been eating enough? My son said you eat very little- he eats me out of house and home so his idea about what constitutes regular portions is a bit skewed but he seems really worried about you so I thought I’d ask. Ah, if that’s okay?

It’s... fine. My wounds are healed. I’m eating, uh, everyday?

We’re going out for dinner right now. Rei said. Hm, she would have to see if he was in fact eating enough for a boy his age. She’d compare to Natsuo for reference.

Midoriya-san, your son... talks about me? Shouto asked.

Oh, all the time. Everyday it’s Todoroki-kun this, Todoroki-kun that. He’s been so worried about you! Especially since the, well, the news. And Hosu. He said you’ve been busy with family matters- and I won’t pry- so he hasn’t had the chance to talk to you in a while. So you mind if I tell him you’re doing okay?

Everyday? He seemed to whisper to himself. No, t-that’s okay. Yeah. Um, has he said anything else?

Ah... Just that he’s worried about where you’re staying and if you feel comfortable there. We have a spare bedroom and he wants you to know you’re welcome to it if you need it. It’s alright with me of course.

Shouto’s jaw dropped as his cheeks pinked again, and he dropped his face to hide behind his bangs. He clutched his hands to his chest. O-oh.

Shouto is staying with his sister for the time being. He was telling me how much he likes it. Rei replied when it was clear Shouto wasn’t going to. Thank you for the concern. Please thank your son for his thoughts. I’m glad that someone outside of the family is looking out for him.

Shouto flinched from behind his mother.

Inko smiled. I will. He’ll be so relieved. She spared a look to her watch and gasped. Oh gosh, I just meant to get some fresh air but I’ve kept you from your plans! Sorry! She opened the door to return to her business. It’s been wonderful talking to you. I know the hours are a bit unusual but feel free to stop by anytime with your boy! It’ll be nice to have a friend in the neighborhood.

Rei felt a flutter of something soft and fuzzy from her hairline to her toes. A friend? ...when was the last time she had one of those? Before Enji. After, most of her friends had gone on to actually make use of their hero certification and were too cowed by his political and social capital to heed her plight. None of them had reached out to her in years. The children were great comfort but they had their own lives. Maybe... should she? Oh it’s been a bit, should probably respond sometime this year- Yes!

Inko blinked at her loud answer.

Erm, Rei flushed, y-yes, I’d like that.

Inko’s smile widened into a 1000-megawatt grin that almost seemed to dull the lights from the within the parlor in comparison. We’re open earlier on the weekends. You could come by then if it’s better for you.

I will, I think. Yeah.

(This was supposed to be a short headcannon and now the animal is loose. I’ll expand from here and post link to AO3 when it’s done. Does anyone want to read more??? Let me know!!

Shouto felt betrayed and protective over his mama so he raged a bit. Izuku can understand why but it definitely hurt and he’s been avoiding Shouto- which Shouto now feels regret about. They’ll make up don’t worry.

Rei and Inko are gonna be nearly as dumb as their sons and I think it’ll be fun.

TLDR: tattoo artist!Inko x flower shop owner!Rei get together AU, still quirks and hero-sons. the name of Rei’s shop has meaning. inko’s almost as cool as she seems yo)

[spade-club]

Really annoying trying to look at DID things online knowing full well I am operating on a "conversations in my head, knowing I will change my mind about certain things, my memory is not very good" basis for things. Like, I have not known who I am in weeks.

I just know that sometimes there will be back and forths in my head. Today I wasnt sure if I could use a specific pot to cook. "It looks a bit weird" "it's fine I was just told it is supposed to look like that" "yeah but I just dont think I can" "its not a big deal, its been used before" "maybe I can force myself to but I'd have to look at it and be constantly reminded it doesnt look up to my standards" "it's literally okay. We're just going to use it, its our only option anyway" *double checks its actually fine and a bit of the weird looking stuff comes off* "yeah, I literally told you it wasnt fine. We're not using that. I'm going to run the dishwasher" and I often have other shorter conversations, like internally teasing myself for little crushes, telling myself off for having dark thoughts, etc.

And often I will consider what different parts of me want. Im ensuring that my roommate knows that people in different spaces know my gender differently and that how I want her to refer to me may be different from what I want from others. And I am making an effort to not make snap decisions on what I want from people because I know that may change, especially if these feelings are coming seemingly out of nowhere.

I also know that my memory isnt fully funtional. Like, I was cleaning my room and I know that right now I want to move where I put my socks somewhere less in the way, but I know that when I get up for work tomorrow I will likely not remember where I put them and it may delay me getting ready and be an issue. I also keep myself repeating stories as soon as I can because repeating things as soon as I enter a different environment keeps me from losing as much detail of it. Like telling my roommate what happened at work so A. I am reminding home me of what happened to work me and B. Someone else can keep track of the important things I may forget.

However. I cant recall a single name, not even of people we used to be aware of. I cant call out to or become anyone I've been for the past few years. Sometimes I get hints of feelings of something. I feel like the host, partially, but I know I cant be him. But maybe I am the host now. I wouldnt know! I just remember things or I dont, all the time. Thats just who I am. Its all I am now. I dont know what that makes me now. I dont know if that makes a difference. All I know is I dont.

I dont know if it's healthy for me to not know. Maybe its just what I need right now. Or maybe this will hurt me in the end. Either way its just how I've been feeling and what I've been thinking. I guess thats the end of this update.