#but unfortunately it just comes down to the fact that i am lazy and slow and weak and not really smart
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tooies · 3 months ago
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every time i start to feel good about myself my dad latches onto some life choice or mistake i make to incur a whole new wave of self-loathing. not on purpose it's just that i'm his way of relieving stress. and yes he has been doing this for literally my entire life as far back as i can remember, to the point where my earliest memories involve him getting mad at me in some way and me feeling like shit about it but not knowing why he was mad or what was going on because i was literally 3 years old
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sunaluvs · 3 months ago
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♡ tags: afab + gn reader, highly suggestive so 18+ MDNI, showering, readers implied to be shorter than meguru but this is a timeskip so he can be 7ft if u wish, fluff.
♡ a/n: i haven't written anything in 2 years and this is disgustingly self indulgent. unfortunately this mans rotting my brain and i am weak. i wrote this in a daze
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Through your light humming and the spray of water, the sound of a door flinging open rings clear through your apartment.
“I’m home baby!” Bachira’s voice booms through your home, the sound winding through the small space left open in the bathroom’s door, the thud of a bag and shuffle of feet following his words.
“Welcome home!” you call back, rinsing the last of the shampoo out of your hair.
You hear him do a little jog towards the bathroom, socked feet thumping against the floor, before his voice calls, “Coming in!”
That’s all the warning you get before your door is thrown open, the sounds of your boyfriend singing your name and the shuffle of his clothes bringing a small smile to your lips.
“How was your day, baby?” you ask, grabbing your bottle of conditioner and squeezing a bit onto your palm.
“Fun as always, I experimented with a few new moves,” he replies, excitement clear in his voice. “My shoulders are busted though, feels like they’re gonna fall off. I’m convinced it’s because you didn’t kiss them before I left this morning.”
You snort, rolling your eyes as you massage the conditioner into your hair, “Oh yeah, definitely, it couldn’t possibly be due to the rigorous training you do every single day.”
“Nope,” he quips, whipping the shower curtain open with a shit-eating grin, stepping in the stream of water in all his naked glory. “It’s not every single day, I get a break on the weekends.”
You hum in reply, lazily dragging your eyes down your boyfriend’s physique, the results of all his hard work. It’s all prominent muscle and compact strength, sharp, defined abs and a strong core, hulking thighs you’ve had the delightful pleasure of sitting on (and between), packing power you’ve seen used to launch countless balls precisely and ruthlessly across fields. The shape of him, embraced with golden sun-kissed skin from the summer sky, is made almost lewd with the addition of water dripping over his body, glistening and moist and trailing deliciously down to his co—
“Eyes up here baby,” he sings, stepping closer to your heating body and bringing his face lower to meet your gaze head-on, beaming at the hazy appreciation clear on your features. “You stare any harder and I’ll start getting shy,” he teases.
That snaps your eyes back into focus, and you snort incredulously, “Oh please, you haven’t known shame since you popped out of the womb. I could fill an address book with all the people who’ve seen your dick.”
He giggles and brings his hands to your hips, gliding over the wet skin, and pulls you slightly out of the water’s stream. “I’ll learn some just for you, baby.”
“Hmm, as long as you don’t suddenly start getting shy on me,” you hum, tipping your head to look at his playful expression. “You can have some shame with everyone else, though. In fact, I am requesting that you do.”
“Anything for you, honey,” he grins, pulling your chest flush against his and dipping his head to kiss you. It’s slow and lazy, wet with the lingering water on your face, his tongue licking your bottom lip like he’s savouring the feel of every crease beneath it. Bachira drags it out as he always does, but doesn’t escalate it, keeping it slow and steady as his hands slip over the soft curves of your body, caressing your waist, thumbing along your rib cage, dipping beneath the swell of your breast. Being out of the water and subjected to his teasing touches pebbles your nipples, and you release a sigh into his willing mouth. Your skin shivers, nectarous arousal gradually trickling into your gut, but there’s no urge to hasten the moment along. For a man always on the move, always looking for the next goal and next game to win, being the one Bachira slows down for is not something you take for granted. You savour every easy breath and satisfied hum he lets out against your lips and lean into his precious, languid warmth.
It’s only when his fingers lightly flick your nipples that you break apart, a string of spit connecting your lips, remaining close enough for your noses to touch fleetingly and your warm breaths to gather in the space between you. His honeyed eyes, typically bright and wide and wild, settle transfixed and heavy-lidded on yours, his gaze no less intense and singularly focused on you. It’s overwhelming sometimes to have all the world’s devotion directed sacredly at you like this, brilliant and irresistible and all-consuming. Bachira never goes halfway at anything, not at his football or his principles, and least of all you. He is persistently and overwhelmingly fierce with his adoration, an ebullient fire that never stops consuming. You’ve never loved the sting of a burn more.
“Getting a little handsy there, ain'tcha,” you murmur, thumbing softly at the grin that spreads on his lips.
“Jus’ playing with my food a bit.”
“Never learned your manners, did you?” you breathe, goosebumps rising on the skin of your thigh as it brushes against his dick, thick and slowly hardening.
“Think I just lose ‘em all with you,” he laughs breathily, the sound hanging adoringly in the steam as he rests his forehead against yours. “Missed you so much today. Every day. Wish I could pack you up in my training bag and take you everywhere with me.”
You huff, bringing your arms around his shoulders and tilting your head to the side, “You don’t think staying home would be easier?”
The words give him pause, eyes fixed on yours as he opens and closes his mouth. His eyebrows furrow. The heat of the moment dissipates as your boyfriend gives your question a genuine thought.
“I mean, yeah? But—well. What about practice then? I don’t think that’d be very productive to my progress and today was actually kinda huge in terms of breakthroughs, I was finally able to get a handle o—”
You burst into giggles at the bewildered expression on his face, torn up at the choice you’ve apparently forced him to make. 
“I’m just playing, baby,” you grin back at him, squishing his cheeks and puckering his lips, cooing, “I’d never be so mean and make you choose.”
He heaves a dramatic breath of relief, planting his face on your shoulders and whining, “You’re being mean now! I almost had a heart attack.”
Your chest feels full to bursting with affection. “Aww, my little honey bee, my sweet baby angel, sorry for forgetting how fragile my sensitive darling is—”
He groans and shakes his head, and you delight in the pout you can feel pressing into your skin, “You’re a bully,” he mumbles, pressing impossibly closer to you, wrapping his arms tightly around your middle.
“I don’t know what you mean, I love you, sweetheart,” you laugh back at him, kissing the top of his dampening head.
His pout transforms into kisses along your shoulder as he hums, moving along the lines of your collarbones. “Yeah?” he breathes against your skin, lips curving up. “You love me?”
“Uhuh.” You indulge him, fingers playing with the hair curling at his nape. “Love you so much, Meguru. Makes me feel kinda crazy sometimes.” 
You feel the soft smile he was pressing into your skin transform into a grin, his eyes no doubt twinkling and bright with delight. “It does?”
“It does,” you repeat, using your hold on his hair to pull his face up from where it rested against your collarbones. Just as you thought, his eyes glisten with infatuation, little crescent moons as he beams up at you with a dopey smile. Your breath catches in your throat at the stunning sight, profound adoration sitting in his faint smile lines and the wrinkles at the corner of his eyes, earnestly dripping like syrup from his voice.
“I make you feel crazy? In love? Really?” he breathes, bringing his face close enough to yours for his warm breath to fan across your lips. “Say it again. Say it, I wanna hear it.”
And who are you to deny Bachira Meguru anything?
“I love you so much, baby,” you murmur, rubbing the tip of your nose against his damp cheek. “Always make me feel so crazy, so full of your love.”
“Again,” he tries to demand, but it’s a plea, you know. A supplication, a prayer to bear witness to the fire blazing with ardour in your chest, one that burns divinely for the man in front of you. His eyes are impossibly bright, drowning you in their sea of sunny reverence, and you know that he, too, would happily walk into the sting of your own flames.
“Feels like I can’t breathe sometimes.”
“Again.”
“Can’t think properly when it comes to you.”
“Again.”
“I love you, Meguru.”
“Again.”
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gravityrises · 20 days ago
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The Virtues of Stanford Pines
Summary: I've seen people accuse Ford of doing horrible things on one side, and people defending his actions on the other side. But how about we turn the tables and talk about all of the good Ford has done. (At least, that was the plan.)
Word Count: 2813.
Spoilers: Gravity Falls series, Journal 3, The Book of Bill, Lost Legends, thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com
1. He's incredibly hard-working:
Just because someone is smart doesn't mean they don't put a lot of effort into studying and Ford definitely did. It's mentioned twice just in "A Tale of Two Stans," when he tries to convince the college board to give him another chance and when he describes his years at Backupsmore.
And it doesn't stop at intellectual pursuits. In Journal 3 Ford says he exercises daily, despite having always hated physical activity.
Anyway, I don't think anyone is going to argue this point, so let's leave it at that.
2. He's supportive of his friend:
There are going to be a few controversial takes, but I truly believe that Ford was trying to be a good friend to Fiddleford. Now, there were fights between them, and Ford did say quite a few insensitive things both to his face and in the Journal. But overall, I don't think he ever intended to hurt Fiddleford, and he definitely appreciated his friend's company.
When Ford invited Fiddleford to work on the portal, he wrote in the journal: "He (Fiddleford) has sacrificed so much to come to my aid. He has temporarily left his bride and their young son... he has abandoned his own professional aspirations... I must do my best to make him feel at home.... I am off to the store for some banjo strings and microchips!" (quote shortened, because I'm lazy) Clearly, Ford cared about his friend and wanted to make him feel welcome.
He also compliments Fiddleford's "brilliant mind," "amusing quirks" and scrupulous work ethic, by saying "I double-check my equations. He quintuple-checks!"
And I hear you, didn't he claim the complete opposite in the series? According to him, Fiddleford "was wasting his talent trying to make personal computers", right? Well, if we ignore the fact that the creators weren't 100% consistent in their writing, here's how I would reconcile those two statements. Ford thought (erroneously) that his friend's research wasn't important in the grand scheme of things, but it was important to Fiddleford personally. And can you really blame Ford? He was about to demostrate the existence of other dimensions and create a gateway that would allow us to visit them. If something like that happened irl, it would've been a groundbreaking discovery, altering our very understanding of the natural world and how it works. Meanwhile, laptops, at least in Ford's opinion, were just "heavy, slow journals." Still, he knew this work was important to Fiddleford, and he wanted to accommodate that. Hence, his trip to buy microchips (and banjo strings.)
Ford tried (and unfortunately, failed) to help Fiddleford deal with his anxiety. In Journal 3, he mentions teaching Fiddleford some meditation techniques and going to the Carnival, so that Fiddleford would enjoy "a day of relaxation." In the Book of Bill, Ford feels guilty about not getting his friend a gift and decides to throw a surprise Christmas party instead. This was also an attempt to cheer Fiddleford up after his fight with his wife.
"But Ford didn't take Fiddleford's anxiety seriously, and it ruined his life." Okay, let's say you're right. Remember, Ford was raised in the 60s. A time when mental illness or just mental distress were looked down on. What was he supposed to do? Suggest Fiddleford goes to the therapist? I mean, they were studying paranormal creatures, if Fiddleford told those stories to a therapist who didn't believe in these things, there would've been a really high chance of misdiagnosis. Should Ford have simply fired Fiddleford? Well, that wouldn't have been very nice. Also, there is no need to infantilize Fiddleford in the first place, he's a grown-up person capable of makind his own decisions. If the job is too stressful, if the relationship doesn't work out, he has every right to leave, because his life and mental well-being are his responsibility. Instead, he ignored Ford's warnings and decided to use the Memory Gun and start a cult. It was, by the end of the day, Fiddleford's decision. And it's tragic. It really is. No one deserves to lose their family, their mind and their sense of self. It's something Ford feels guilty about, because whether it was intentional or not, he did indirectly contribute to Fiddleford's downfall. That's why, when they finally reunited after 30 years, Ford apologized to Fiddleford. And according to Journal 3, Fiddleford dissmised his apology, leading Ford to say that "Not only is this man's mind superior to mine, but he has one of the biggest hearts I've ever seen."
3. He has no reservations about helping others out:
There's a reason why Ford's the first person people turn to, when there's a problem. He has both the desire and the skills to help people out. Using Dipper's idea, he stops agents from investigating his family. He goes above and beyond just to change a lightbulb in the kitchen. Though morally questionable, he did give the kids a mind control tie with the intent of helping Stan win the elections. In the comics, Stan turns to Ford when Mabel's face is stolen and when Stan himself is cursed by an old chest.
And that's how things were in the past too. In "The Pines Boys in: The Jersey Devil's in the Details", Ford defends his brother, twice. First, when Filbrick accuses Stan of stealing the gold chain from his pawn shop. And then, when the Sibling Brothers offered Ford to let him keep the monster and become famous in exchange for photos that would prove Stan's guilt. And just to add an incentive, they threatened to frame both twins, if Ford didn't comply. Obviously, it didn't work.
According to thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com, that's also how he became friends with Fiddleford: on the very first day, he spent nine hours helping his new friend prove his theory. And in the Book of Bill, when Ford learns that Bill's home dimension was destroyed by a monster, his immediate reaction is to offer help with hunting it down.
Whenever someone's in distress, Ford really wants to help them out, and I don't know about you, but to me that doesn't sound like someone lacking empathy.
4. He's got no qualms questioning the status quo:
In Journal 3, Ford mentions traveling to Northwest Manor to confront Old Man Northwest with evidence of his family's deceit. Instead, he was met by young Preston, who wasn't impressed with his speech and forcibly escorted Ford from the premises.
Also in Journal 3, Ford wanted to debate politics with Reagan. Make of that what you will.
Now this one is more of a conjecture, but in the Book of Bill, this is how Bill compliments him: "Guys as smart as you come along once every century, and they scare the pants off of authority figures!" This lie wouldn't have worked, if it wasn't what Ford actually wanted.
And of course, learning that his former "muse" is one of the most feared beings in the entire multiverse, didn't stop Ford from going on a quest to defeat Bill. Even after witnessing other creatures shriek and cover their ears at the mere mention of Bill's name. Which leads me to my next point.
5. Calling him determined would be a massive understatement:
Forget his sleepless nights at college, forget his extensive research in Gravity Falls, Ford has spent 30 years, let me repeat that again, 30 years traveling across dimensions and looking for a way to destroy Bill Cipher. I haven't even been alive for that long! From the little we know about those years, they were anything but easy. In fact, Ford describes them as "frightening, exciting, cruel, and strange." (And of course, the guy actually does use the Oxford comma in his writing. Who would've thought?) Let me stress that Ford was under no obligation to continue his quest, maybe he could've found a quiet dimension to settle down and live peacefully, in fact, that's something he contemplates while visiting A Better World in Journal 3. But he decides against it. Not because he didn't want to, he literally says that he wanted to revel in his parallel self's success. Not because defeating Bill would get him recognition. It wouldn't, at least not in his home dimension, where no one is even aware of the danger. No, he didn't stay, because his own conscience wouldn't allow it. Ford just couldn't break his vow from 30 years ago, it's as simple as that.
And what does he do, when his plans fall apart? Does he even consider giving up? Of course not! In fact, he ends his tale of interdimensional travel with the following sentence: "My resolve to defeat Bill has never been stronger." It's almost comical, watching him throw anything he can think of at Bill and see what might stick. His battle in the Nightmare Realm was interrupted? He jumps through the portal to stop Bill's forces from entering his dimension. The portal created an interdimensional rift? He tries to contain it. Bill threatens to get his hands on the rift? This time Ford has two ideas: he tries to encrypt Dipper's thoughts and creates a mystical barrier around the house. The worst happens and the world is about to end? Well, get in loser, we're going to shoot Bill with Quantum Destabilizer. Ford misses and is captured? Not to worry, there's a Zodiac prophecy, we can give that a try. It doesn't work, because two grown men can't put aside their grievances for just a few seconds, gosh that scene is so frustrating to watch. Well, here is another idea: one can erase Bill with a memory gun as long as he's in someone's mind. I don't know what else to say, Ford really did his homework, when he set out to destroy Bill.
6. He has the patience of a saint:
Wow, now here's a controversial take. Remember Stan's "Beep boop. I am a nerd robot. That's you. That's what you sound like," which Ford just laughs off. Yes, that's what siblings do all the time. And yes, this teasing does come from a place of hurt. Stan was feeling like "the stupid twin," "a dumb idiot who screws everything up," so Ford felt like he just had to put up with this. But it's still hurtful to be mocked for your interests. It really feels like their relationship was already a little strained even before the Science Fair Project Incident.
What about the fact that he was the first to stop the fight in "Dungeons, Dungeons, and more Dungeons" and suggesting Stan might actually have fun, if he joined their game?
Or all the snide comments Stan made, when they reunited during Weirdmageddon, including "Well, he's lost his mind" and "You really think some caveman graffiti is gonna stop that monster?" All of which Ford simply ignored. Yes, he did correct Stan's grammar under the worst of circumstances, I agree, but you know, everyone has their pet peeves.
What people often forget is just how difficult it is to be a kind person, when you're stressed. It is much easier to treat people with respect and understanding, when you yourself are doing fine. So is it that big of a surprise, that someone who's under pressure, sleep-deprived and/or in pain might be more prone to outbursts? And we know how traumatic Ford's experience of being bullied as a kid was, how much suffering Bill put him through, how difficult his years on the other side of the portal were and how much pressure he was under, trying to prevent a literal end of the world. It's ironic that the people who blame Ford for his lack of empathy, really don't show him any empathy themselves.
7. Even under torture, he didn't reveal the equation that would've allowed Bill to take over the world:
Do I really have to spell it out? Look, as someone who was on the verge of mental breakdown from a simple toothache, I have nothing else to say other than: This is admirable. And he did it to protect the world that, need I remind you, wasn't particularly kind to him. On the same note, he just never joined Bill in the first place: not in the 80s, and not during Weirdmageddon.
"Oh, but he's the one who started the Apocalypse, so he kind of deserved it." Seriously? No, I mean it, are you being serious? Is that something you would say to a person suffering from diabetes type 2, that it's their fault for eating too many sweets; or to someone with liver cirrhosis that they deserve to suffer because of their alcohol addiction? Because this is neither appropriate, nor helpful. Talk about kicking someone when they're down...
8. He's fiercely loyal to his family:
I think the way Ford compliments his grandniece in "The Last Mabelcorn" is very revealing: "You've protected your family. You're a good person, Mabel." His very definition of a "good person" is "someone who supports and protects their family." Which is... interesting to say the least, considering that Ford has spent a very long time away from his family and completely alone. But it does sound like something he aspires to. That's why he goes out of his way to help his family out, whenever they're in trouble. (See point 3 for more on this.)
When Bill threatens the kids, Ford is willing to risk the entire universe for a slim chance that they might be spared. It's a cruel Trolley Problem, which once again proves just how much he values his family. Still, this is some Fate/Zero level angst and I don't want to talk about it more than I absolutely have to. Let's finish this up with something more lighthearted.
9. He's never lost curiosity and childlike wonder:
This! This is what made me fall in love with the man and why I'm wasting my time writing this nonsense in the first place. This allconsuming excitement, when he finds a new anomaly to study; this seemingly endless energy, when he explores new places; this pure joy, when he gets to play DD&MD with Dipper! I don't know how to talk about it without gushing.
Ford obviously loves games, and not just DD&MD. He plays chess with Bill. He mentions being great at charades in the comics. And what cracks me up the most: during Weirdmageddon, when Pacifica compared the Zodiac to a game of hopscotch, not only did not Ford get offended, but he replied: "It would be a pretty fun game of hopscotch." Ford, darling, the world is about to end, is this really the best time to contemplate a hypothetical game of hopscotch? Also, you've just been through something traumatic... Forget it, you've been through 3 decades of traumatic experiences, can you at least have the decency to become a tad more cynical as you age, like the rest of us. I guess, mirth really is the mail of anguish. (It's from Emily Dickinson's poem and the quote means that some people act cheerful to hide their suffering.)
Also, something Ford doesn't get enough credit for, mostly because people usually focus on his academic achievements, but he is quite creative. He draws incredibly detailed sketches not only depicting various anomalies he encounters, but also whatever happens in his life. (Probably off-topic, but I find the implications of that karaoke page so funny. Think about it: the guy sobered up, looked at the incomprehensible nonsense he had written the previous night and thought: "You know what? This could really use an illustration.") Also don't forget that he canonically plays piano. Yeah, if I were Stan, I'd be jealous too.
And of course, that's why he's so passionate about science. Sure, part of him wants the fame and recognition that would come, if he makes a big discovery, but you can't deny that he genuinely enjoys learning new things. And that he enjoys sharing them with whoever is willing to listen.
In conclusion, I'm not trying to say that Ford is perfect in every way and has never done a single wrong thing in his life. To be honest, that would've made him a really boring character. So, yes, he is flawed, and misguided, and sometimes insensitive. He's made a lot of missteps because of his upbringing, personality and, as many have speculated, neurodivergence. But I really take issue with people saying Ford's a bad person, when he clearly isn't. Ford is and always was a good person, and by the end of all the trials he became a better person. One who understands that the only way to success is cooperation, not being a lone vigilante. That it's not a weakness to ask for help or to need help in the first place. And that a sea otter shared is a sea otter halved.
That's strange... why did I write that?
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livingfictional · 4 months ago
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Hiya!!!
I just stumbled upon your blog, and you're match ups, I really like your content! :D I saw that your requests are open, and I thought I might as well request one! ^^
I would like to request a match up for COD and The Arcana. I am 19, female, and use she/they pronouns. I am also Pansexual (I don't have any gender preferences, we just gotta vibe and all is well✨️).
I really love listening to music and singing, I'm also an avid reader and have recently started down my path with practising witchcraft. I am not sure if this qualifies as a hobby, but I also enjoy taking my motorcycle out for a ride across the country whenever I have time (and money for gas 🥲). I do not do well in crowds or around loud and mentally draining people. Neither do I enjoy cooking because it, for some odd reason, drains me incredibly, baking on the other hand I enjoy thoroughly!
I speak English, German and Italian. My father is from Scotland🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 and my mother from Austria🇦🇹, I have an equally good connection with both sides of my relatives even though I am more in tune with my Austria side due to the fact that I grew up there.
I'm an INFP, I wouldn't call myself shy or skittish but I do struggle to build up relationships because of trust issues and fear of betrayal. I prefer a small circle of people around me, mostly calm and like minded people that know how to get me out of my shell. I'm also a big fan of animals and especially fond of dogs and cats (even though I'm allergic lol).
I hope that was enough info for a match-up! Have a wonderful day/night, Lily!✨️💜
Sorry you had to wait so long, thank you for your patience 🩵
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I match you up with... Asra!
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I genuinely think Asra would be the best choice for you.
Lazy mornings in the back of the shop. A mess of limbs tangled into the blankets as you slowly flip through the pages of your book.
Asra just lays there, watching your focused expression with a content smile. He could stare at you for hours. The shop won't run itself, though. Unfortunately.
He'll happily support your witchcraft journey, helping whenever possible. He grabs any and every book he thinks you might like.
Asra is one of the least draining people to be around, his company is always pleasurable. The atmosphere never feels heavy, and he can make the converation flow for hours on end. It always feels so natural and nice to be around him.
Might as well mention Faust, who fell in love with you just as Asra did. You can often find her perched up on your shoulders as you go about your day.
I match you up with... Soap!
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Not an avid reader, doesn't always know what books to buy you. Just ask! He would buy the whole bookstore for you.
Johnny wants to spoil you, okay? He can be gone for long periods of time, and your books are the only thing keeping you company on cold winter evenings. So in his mind they are perfect gifts for you, might as well, with some help, get you one of those gift baskets with a fuzzy pair of socks, a blanket, some candy and books.
Before he has to leave, he will also take your bike and fill it up for you. Can't afford gas? Well, he can. Go for your ride sweetie :3
Slow evenings with him after he comes back from being deployed are the best. You guys are full after getting takeout from your favorite place, you've got a fire going in the fireplace and a random movie is playing on TV.
To be fair, you are not paying attention to it at all. You're brushing your fingers through his dark hair as he goes on about anything and everything.
Just as with Asra, conversations with Johnny are so natural to you, nothing ever feels forced. You guys can talk for hours and not get bored.
He can be more on the hyper side, but next to you, he can truly unwind. He will lie on top of you, placing his head over your heart.
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kpopfanfictrash · 4 years ago
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Raise the Barre (Ch. 8)
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Author: kpopfanfictrash
Pairing: Jimin / Reader
Rating: 18+ (Eventual Smut)
Genre: Enemies to Lovers / Dance Academy!AU
Warnings: underage drinking, angst, hoseok’s bare abs
Word Count: 10,705
Summary: You and Park Jimin have been rivals for as long as you’ve known one another; ever since he tripped you in the front row of your first dance convention. When you graduate from high school and enter Russet Ballet Academy, you tell yourself you’re leaving all past quarrels behind. The main problem with this though, is that your past seems determined not to leave you alone.
Worse still, the obstacles you face while out in the real world might prove more challenging than anything your enemy has to offer.  
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“Okay, even you have to admit this is too soon.” Finn stared, appalled at the chalkboard. “It’s not even Halloween!”
Laughing a little, you looped your arm around his to drag him towards the back. Plopping down in a chair, you placed your order number in the center of the table. Seating himself across the table from you, Finn began to undo his coat.
“Come on.” He grinned, brown hair flopping when he leaned forward. “Admit it – this is too early for holiday drinks.”
“Okay, maybe it’s a little early,” you acquiesced. “But Halloween is tomorrow! They probably just put up the holiday drinks so they don’t have to do it on Sunday.”
“Laziness!” he cried, jabbing a finger in the air.
Shaking your head, you smiled when Namjoon, the barista, placed a pumpkin soy latte before you.
“Thanks!” you said, pulling this towards you.
“No problem,” he said, flashing his dimples before he turned to leave.
Taking a long, slow sip of your drink, you groaned. “Oh my god. This is it. This is heaven.”
Finn laughed. “Is that seriously your first pumpkin drink of the season?” Sadly, he shook his head. “I remember our senior year, you dragged me out of bed at 7:00 AM on a Saturday just to get the first pumpkin drink of the year.”
“I know,” you sighed. “But I’ve needed the extra caffeine jolt each morning. Sweet drinks just don’t cut it anymore.”
“Ah, the first step in addiction.” Finn nodded sagely.
Smiling, you settled back in your seat as he took the first sip of his black coffee. It had been two weeks since your fight at the club and since then, Finn had been on his best behavior. For about a week, things between you had been awkward but slowly, your relationship was returning to normal.
Seated in the corner of your favorite coffee shop, you drank from your cup and glanced around the room. This was what you’d pictured when you imagined you and Finn living in the city together. Coffee dates, going on new adventures and continuing your relationship where it had left off.
Of course, this morning was only possible because Miss Britt’s ballet class had been cancelled. A contemporary master class had been scheduled for the afternoon, but your day before then was free – something you’d immediately taken advantage of by calling Finn. It was becoming easier to fit each other into your schedules, more like second nature, but things were still tense whenever things didn’t line up.
None of this was eased by the burgeoning whatever-it-was you’d shoved to the back of your mind regarding Jimin. Since the day of Mr. Vlad’s ballet class, you’d managed to keep your emotions in check, but were constantly on the lookout for dangerous situations. You and Jimin were professionals, obviously, but you were also only human. It was reasonable to have subconscious wants and desires, but these weren’t important unless you chose to act upon them.
You didn’t tell Finn about it because honestly, there was nothing to tell. Okay, so you’d felt an errant spark one day during a lift. Big deal. Finn had been your boyfriend for over two years – it would take more than that to threaten your relationship. A relationship which, frankly, had been getting stronger as of late. Telling him something as inconsequential as a spark you had with Jimin would only take you further down the wrong path.
“Are you sure you’re okay with us doing separate things tomorrow?” Finn interrupted your thoughts. His brow furrowed. “It is Halloween, after all.”
“Ah, yes.” You nodded. “Halloween, the internationally known couple’s holiday.”
He laughed. “Okay, point made – but still.”
“It’s fine,” you assured him. This was something you’d already been over. “It just makes sense like this! Your friends are going to that off-campus party and I promised Noelle I’d go to this club thing with her.”
“Right, of course.” Finn grinned. “I’m bummed I’ll miss seeing you as the Powerpuff girls, though. Who’s going to be the third one, again?”
“Well, I’m Blossom – obviously.”
“Of course.” He nodded. “Miss Responsibility.”
A twinge of annoyance went through you, but you pushed it aside. You didn’t think you were always the responsible one but admittedly, you’d been more on edge than usual lately.
“Anyways,” you continued with a roll of your eyes. “I’m Blossom, Noelle is Buttercup and Irene is going as Bubbles. It’ll be fun! Aside from the whole club part, of course.”
“It does sound fun,” Finn admitted, a tad mournful. “Meanwhile, I’ve been roped into the classic college bro costume of Ghostbusters.”
“Oh, come on! That is classic! You’ll be super cute in your… suit? Cargo pants? What do Ghostbusters wear again?”
“Knowing Ben, something tragic from Party City. Pray for me.”
“I’ll light candles.”
Finn grinned, sipping his coffee again and your conversation slipped naturally to other topics.
Halloween fell on a Saturday this year, which meant every college campus was gearing up for some epic parties. Noelle had managed to snag tickets to a club fancy enough to require an RSVP. Apparently, said brother she missed was a DJ and could get tickets to a lot of things if Noelle bothered to ask.
A bunch of people from Russet were going, which made you excited. There hadn’t been many parties with your classmates so far this semester. Despite technically being in college, your classmates were all under the same intense pressure, only made worse by constant early morning ballet.
This week though, even your teachers seemed to have decided you needed a break. Aside from the master class you had this afternoon, there were zero Russet classes until Monday morning. The break in schedule meant you could actually go out – and drink – if you so decided. You and Noelle were planning on attending a ballet class tomorrow, but your entire day after would be free.
You’d originally planned on seeing Finn during the day, but then he’d been invited to a Halloween darty (day party) starting at noon. Despite not seeing Finn on Halloween, you weren’t feeling stressed. It was only one holiday and not even a couple’s one, as you’d said.
After coffee, you kissed Finn goodbye and headed to class at Danley Hall. The atmosphere was different as soon as you entered the classroom – all of the students were buzzing, excited by the prospect of the weekend ahead. The excitement only grew when coupled with the fact that today’s class was contemporary.
For nearly two months, your training had been mostly ballet. This was the foundation of all western dance, and where most dance students were expected to start. Finally though, you were being given a chance to show off. Today’s teacher, Luna Jordan, was a well-known contemporary choreographer across the globe.
You’d done a master class with her once back in high school and honestly couldn’t wait to learn from her again. She wasn’t alone, though, you noticed as you walked in – an unfamiliar, dark-haired guy stood beside her, stretching lithely before the room’s mirror.
“Holy shit,” Noelle whispered as she came to a stop. “That’s Jeon Jungkook.”
Startled, you looked twice and saw she was right. You hadn’t recognized him without his bevy of followers, but Jeon Jungkook was known in the dance world. A child prodigy, he’d been on America’s Got Talent at age eleven and finished in second place. Following this, his family had moved to LA and he’d been in high demand for movies, music videos and performances ever since.
You remembered hearing he worked with Luna Jordan, but the thought hadn’t crossed your mind before now that he might be here.
Noelle cocked her head to one side. “He’s hot.”
“Noelle,” you hissed, trying to shush her.
“What!” A devious grin spread across her face. “Am I supposed to be blind, as well as mute?”
“Well, no, but –”
“Alright, everyone!” Miss Luna clapped her hands together. “I know everyone is excited for the weekend, but we unfortunately have an hour and a half together before then. Everyone spread out for warm-ups!”
A few people laughed, spreading out on the floor as class began. Noelle wriggled her eyebrows, pulling you towards the front in order to get the best spot. Hiding a smile, you ducked your head and settled beside her into a stretch.
Noelle was nearly as excited as you were for the opportunity to dance contemporary. Most of your classmates knew this to be your forte – you caught glances from the corner of your eye while you warmed up, trying not to let their attention get to your head.
Jimin was also near the front, although on the opposite side. You suspected your class was equally excited to see him perform – as talented as Jimin was at ballet, there was a reason you hadn’t thought he’d be at Russet this fall. Jimin’s strength in jazz and contemporary was unparalleled. You would’ve thought he’d gone to LA to become a dancer like Jungkook.
Speaking of whom – Jungkook really was attractive; that much couldn’t be denied. He had dark, wavy hair pulled into a bun and cheekbones sharp enough to cut glass. When he glanced up from his stretch, his gaze somehow found yours and he smiled.
Eyes widening, you stared until you caught sight of Jimin behind him. Glancing between the two of you, Jimin’s expression soured before he looked away. Lips parting, you felt the sudden urge to say something, but there was too much distance between you.
“You ready?” Miss Luna called, an upbeat pop song blasting from the stereo. “Let’s go!”
She launched into isolations, leaving the rest of the class to follow. Warm-ups passed quickly and before you knew it, you were gathered at center to learn the combination. Miss Luna’s style was right up your alley. The steps came easily and, once you’d learned the whole chorus, she left you alone to practice.
You were helping Ari with a difficult move when you caught sight of Sabrina as you turned. She’d positioned herself near the back, which had to be a first. Usually, Sabrina was front and center to allow for maximum receipt of teacher praise.
The decision to stand near the back could’ve been strategy – sometimes, dancers did that at conventions. Conventions were giant weekends of competition with teachers from all over the globe who taught master classes to hundreds of dancers in hotel ballrooms and convention centers. Space at the front tended to be limited, so some stayed at the back, where there was more room to dance and be seen. You had a greater likelihood to capture the teacher’s attention when you had the room to do incredible leaps.
Sabrina’s decision didn’t seem strategic, though. While you watched, Sabrina stumbled transitioning from one move to the next. A brief twinge of pity went through you.
It was easy enough to spot ballerinas dancing anything but ballet. Although ballet was the root of modern westernized dance, it could be hard to translate into other styles. Ballet was more rigid than contemporary, jazz or hip-hop. In ballet, each position was defined, individual style was limited, and dancers were expected to all look the same. Standing out in the corps de ballet was equally frowned upon as missing an entrance.
Not that ballet wasn’t important to all dance styles, mind you. Even hip-hop dancers took ballet to improve their balance, core strength and general understanding of the body. There was an element of individuality in other dance styles, though, which lacked in ballet. Contemporary and hip-hop dancers were expected to have relentless technique all while creating their own, unique flair.
Just looking at Sabrina you could clearly see the holes. She was trying so hard to emulate the moves of Miss Luna, she was kind of missing the point. When Miss Luna did a certain flick of the wrist, it wasn’t a defined part of the choreography, but rather an individual choice.
Without thinking, you took a step forward – only to stop. Sabrina wouldn’t want your help; she’d already made that abundantly clear. Besides, you knew her friend Katie to be a contemporary dancer. She could help Sabrina and yet, when you looked, you saw Katie practicing near the front with Jungkook.
Jungkook obviously knew the steps, since this was probably the tenth time he’d learned the combination. Dance teachers often did that – selected a dancer to attend classes with them, traveling to different cities to demonstrate the combination and help when they weren’t free.
Before you could decide whether to help Sabrina, Miss Luna clapped her hands again.
“Let’s do groups!” she declared. “I’ll count you off into groups of four, and each group will showcase. Sound good?”
It wasn’t really a question so much as an announcement. The rest of the class nodded, waiting while Miss Luna counted you off. You ended up in the same group as Irene, Paulo and a few others. Jimin and Noelle were in the group two, while Sabrina was in the group after theirs.
Jogging off to the side, you waited while the first group took center. You were part of group four, which meant you’d be amongst the last to dance on the floor. When the music began, you closed your eyes and began to mark the combination. You tried not to focus on what anyone else was doing, but this became difficult once Noelle’s group stepped up.
Noelle had trained in jazz and contemporary, although she’d stopped in high school to focus mainly on ballet. Still, her artistry shone in her movement. She could definitely stand to loosen up a bit but was still one of the best in the bunch. You found yourself smiling when she landed a turn, silently cheering her on from the side.
While you were watching, Jimin cut across your vision.
Dropping to the ground, he rolled and arched as his forehead brushed wood. His quality of movement was breathtaking and for a moment, you felt like you were back in high school.
Suddenly returned to those dimmed auditoriums, you watched Jimin take the stage like an otherworldly being. His body seemed to move before your mind could comprehend. Barely did he finish one move before he was starting another, the steps flowing endlessly together like unhindered water. Although you knew the combination and knew how you would dance it, watching Jimin perform was a different experience entirely.
Ballet required dancers to stay on the beat but in contemporary, they were expected to lag. Extensions were all the more breathtaking when they clung to the last second, seeming as though the dancer might not make it before they caught up. Jimin was an expert in this, knowing exactly when to hang precariously over the edge and when to pull back.
Watching him dance, that pesky, strange something bloomed in your chest again.
Squashing this quickly, you looked away and resumed marking the combo. The end of the song was improvisation though and, unable to stop yourself, you found your attention drifting to Jimin again. He was ridiculously beautiful – you nearly didn’t hear when Miss Luna called for them to stop. As she turned off the music, she applauded the group while they walked from the floor.
Breathing heavily, Noelle came to a stop alongside you and – somewhat guiltily, since you hadn’t been watching – you gave her a high-five.
“That was awesome!” you said with a grin. “You definitely stood out in the group.”
Noelle snort-laughed. “Not with Jimin up there, but that’s okay. This is his specialty – and yours,” she added with a wink. “I’m psyched for group four.”
“Ah,” you groaned, rubbing your neck. “Too much pressure.”
Noelle laughed, shaking her head as group three took the floor. Both of you fell silent to watch, your curious gaze finding Sabrina in the back. Sabrina looked almost nervous; an emotion which seemed out of place on her features. It made her look almost human.
As soon as the music began, you stifled a wince. Sabrina stood out from the group, and not in a good way. She had the combination down but moved with a woodenness you would’ve expected from someone half her age. It was enough for you to glance at Miss Luna, wondering if she had noticed.
“Wow,” Noelle whispered, looking almost gleeful. “Sabrina is terrible.”
“Noelle!” you whisper-laughed.
“What? After everything she’s done? After everything she’s said?” Noelle’s gaze narrowed. “Sabrina deserves this.”
Despite privately agreeing, you couldn’t help but feel bad as Sabrina continued. Not wanting to watch any longer, you turned towards the front and resumed marking the combo. As soon as Miss Luna cut the music and polite clapping ensued, you turned back around.
It was time for group four. A shaky, sick feeling entered your stomach as you walked to center. So many eyes were on you, but it had been so long since you danced contemporary. You couldn’t help but wonder if you were as good as people seemed to imagine. Surrounded by so many dancers at Russet, surely your own talent would pale in comparison.
As soon as the music began though, everything faded. Insecurities slipping away, a lightness entered your chest as, eyes falling shut, you slowly inhaled.
Taking a step forward, you opened your eyes and began.
To you, dance had several phases. The first was learning, where you memorized each step and put them in order. The second was understanding, where your muscle memory began to take over and the combination felt smoother. The final phase, performance, was when you thought not of the steps, and were free to just dance.
This was your favorite phrase. In this phase, your mind separated from your body, leaving you only with sweat and emotion. Dance was the only art form composed solely of the body. An odd combination of physical strength and artistic beauty, it was both a testament to human capability and human emotion.
Losing yourself in the music, you ebbed and flowed through the combination until the choreography ended and improvisation began. Finally, you let go and held nothing back. Raw, unbridled passion poured out as you lost sight of yourself, so consumed by the movement.
When the song finally finished and you came to a stop, you were panting for breath. Glancing up, the first person you saw was Jimin.
He stood off to one side, leaning casually against the rungs of the barre, but his expression was anything but. Focused on you, his gaze had turned dark in a way which made you catch your breath.
Miss Luna clapped both hands once again, returning your attention to her. Blinking, Jimin shook his head and in your peripheral, you saw him straighten.
“Very good!” Miss Luna scanned the group. “I know our time is nearly at and end, but why don’t we have a few students come out and demonstrate?”
Again, this was fairly common in master classes. After learning the combination, teachers would often single out students to perform as examples. It wasn’t always the students with the best technique who got chosen. Oftentimes, it was as much for passion and performance quality.
Taking a step forward, Miss Luna began to call out names. You were one of the first – setting your water down, you jogged back to center. Jimin was the next person called, then Noelle, much to your excitement. Jungkook was also instructed to join on the floor.
Turning the lights halfway down, Miss Luna pressed play and let you improvise until the combination began. Jungkook started dancing and honestly, he was beautiful, but you couldn’t linger on him for long. 
Catching sight of Jimin again, you were once more transported to earlier times. This wasn’t the first time you’d been called out together. Oftentimes, this had happened at conventions but back then, your mind had been too clouded to see him for who he was.
You’d always wanted to beat him in high school, but now, you were consumed by the oddest desire to see him do well.
Glancing up, Jimin caught your gaze and he smiled – but then, the combination began.
By the time you were finished, you could hardly catch your breath but somehow, you felt the most alive you’d been in ages. Back in your own element, surrounded by some of the most amazing dancers in the world – this was what you’d imagined when you came to Russet.
People around the room clapped, some of them begrudgingly. You got the impression many of your classmates weren’t used to not being chosen. As you walked from the floor, you saw surprisingly, Sabrina wasn’t amongst them.
Instead, Sabrina simply looked tired – as though she’d tried her best and it hadn’t been enough. You knew that look. You sympathized with that look.
The look lingered in the back of your mind while you packed up your things and listened to Noelle discuss Halloween tomorrow. When she mentioned Ari had decided to visit her family this weekend, an idea began to form in your mind.
“Wait,” you interrupted, looking up. “Ari can’t come tomorrow?”
Noelle shook her head. “Her brother just turned eighteen, so her whole family is having a party or something.”
“So… her ticket is free, then?”
“Yes…” Noelle paused. “Why? Y/N, what are you planning?”
“Okay. Hear me out,” you said as you shrugged on your coat. It was cold enough now for the coat to be necessary.
Noelle sighed, slinging her bag over her shoulder. “Alright, I’m listening.”
Glancing away, you saw Sabrina packing her things on the other side of the room. Before you could talk yourself out of it, you returned to Noelle.
“What if we invited Sabrina?”
Noelle snorted. “Pass.”
“Noelle,” you laughed, reaching out for her arm. “Come on! Do you really think she’s doing anything for Halloween?”
“Probably not. And that’s her own fault.”
“Maybe,” you said, glancing at Sabrina once more. “But how could it hurt? We have an extra ticket, there’ll be tons of people tomorrow night. She’ll probably say no – at least this way, you can claim a write-off on your way into heaven!”
Noelle upper lip twitched. “Oh, is that how write-offs work?”
“Well, I can only assume.”
Finally, she laughed. “Ugh, fine. You can invite her – but only because it’s Halloween, and Halloween is a time for peace. And slutty costumes.”
“Thanks, babe,” you said, squeezing her waist in a one-armed hug.
Sighing exaggeratedly, Noelle waved aside your thanks. Hiking your bag higher, you began to make your way across the room. As you closed in on Sabrina, you began to rethink your choice. It had been nearly a month since anything bad had happened between you but still, you found yourself feeling wary. As tough as you pretended to be, rejection hurt you just as much as the next person.
Still, dancing with Jimin had been a reminder of just how bitter your relationship used to be. If that relationship could change, you had to imagine things with Sabrina could, too.
Coming to a stop at her bag, you waited for her to look up. When she finally did, her brow wrinkled in confusion.
“What?” Sabrina asked, sounding defensive. “What do you want, Y/N?”
You couldn’t really blame her for her suspicion. Had your situations been reversed, you would’ve been equally distrustful. It was likely Sabrina thought you were coming over to gloat, or say something to do with class today. Another twinge of pity went through you as Sabrina zipped her bag shut to stand.
“I just wanted to know what you were doing tomorrow,” you said, trying to smile. “Noelle has an extra ticket to a Halloween party, and we thought you might like to come.”
Sabrina stared. “What?”
“Tomorrow is Halloween,” you said, a bit slower. “You know – when we were kids, it was all about costumes and candy. Now, it’s about costumes and booze?”
Sabrina failed to crack a smile. “And you want… me to come to this party?”
Something about the way she said this made you sad, as though she genuinely thought this might be a joke. As though at any moment, someone might jump out and yell SIKE.
“Yeah,” you said, softening a little. “Look – it’s not a big deal if you can’t make it. A bunch of our class is going though, so we thought of you.”
Sabrina hesitated, then glanced at the door. “Okay,” she said, looking back. “Okay, yeah. I’ll come.”
Stifling your surprise, you nodded. “Great. I’ll text you where to meet us tomorrow before the club. Wear a costume,” you added before walking away. “Noelle said it’s required.”
“Alright,” Sabrina said, so quiet you almost missed it.
Walking away, you were nearly at the door when Jungkook popped up before you. Flashing a smile, he fixed a loose strand of hair away from his face. Feet fumbling to a stop, you could only stare.
“Y/N, right?” he said, sounding shy.
Unable to find the words, you blinked in response. The way Jungkook danced had been so confident, you’d only assumed this to be his off-floor persona, as well. Hearing him sound shy was unexpected. 
Also – you hadn’t expected him to know your name.
“I… yeah, that’s me.” Shaking your head, you smiled. “Jungkook, right?”
“Yeah.” He nodded. “I just wanted to say I’m such a big fan of your dancing. It was great to take class with you today.”
Without meaning to, a laugh escaped your lips. Jungkook stared at you, baffled until you quickly waved him off.
“Oh, no – no! Sorry,” you said. “I’m not laughing at you! I’m just laughing at the ridiculousness of you saying you’re a fan of me.”
Some of Jungkook’s wariness disappeared, and a small smile played across his lips.
“Well, I am.” His grin widened. “I used to assist on the convention circuit, too and I remember you being called out all the time. You and Jimin,” he added, glancing across the room.
You looked, too and saw Jimin still packing his things. His back was stiff, pointedly not looking in your direction. Lingering on him a moment, you returned to Jungkook.
“Still,” you said with a laugh. “It’s a bit of a stretch to say we took class together when you’re the teacher’s assistant.”
“True.” Jungkook paused. “Well, next time you’re in LA, let’s fix that. Let me know if you’re ever in town and we can take a class together.”
Despite yourself, your brows raised. It was harmless, but Jungkook was definitely flirting with you. He was attractive, sure and seemed nice, but he lived in LA and you had a boyfriend. You should probably leave before things had the chance to go any further. The last thing you needed was another complication. Adjusting your bag, you gave Jungkook a small smile.
“Sounds like a plan,” you said before turning away.
Jungkook chuckled from behind. “Bye, Y/N.”
As you joined Noelle at the door, she stared over your shoulder.
“What?” you said, coming to a stop.
Noelle’s gaze moved to yours in disbelief. “How?” she demanded as you exited class. “How do you have all these men just… tripping over themselves for you?”
Heat rising to your face, you shook your head. “That’s – I,” you sputtered. “You’re being ridiculous!”
“Am I?” Noelle grinned. “First Jimin, now Jungkook… and all this while having a boyfriend.” 
“I… you... Jimin is not tripping over himself for me!”
Both her brows shot way, way up. “Is that the only part of the sentence you took objection to?”
“Shut up,” you groaned and shoved her in the side.
Noelle laughed but nodded. “Alright, fine! I’ll stop. Did Sabrina say she’ll come?”
“She did.”
“Great. I still don’t like her,” Noelle said, pushing open the door. “But I guess you’re right, I have an extra ticket. It’s nice to be nice.”
You laughed, pulling your coat tighter as you walked outside. “You’re a saint.”
While you walked, your phone dinged and pulling this from your pocket, you saw a notification on Instagram. Jeon_Jungkook97 has followed you.
Shaking your head, you returned this to your jacket as you continued. While it was nice of Jungkook to compliment your dancing, his approval didn’t mean as much as certain other peoples had. This realization stuck in your mind, making you wonder about Noelle’s teasing jibe.
She had said Jimin flirted with you, but that wasn’t true – was it? You would have known if Jimin were flirting. It was hard to pick out though, since Jimin was friendly with everyone. That was just who he was; as he’d said earlier, he liked to be liked. A note of uncertainty entered your thoughts though, recalling the ballet class with your chest pressed to his. Shoving this away, you forced yourself to focus on the upcoming weekend.
Halloween was a night for fun, for letting loose and enjoying yourself with your friends. You refused to let the night be spoiled by any lingering feelings – either from you, or towards you.
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The next night was perfect Halloween weather.
Chilly, but not cold enough to risk snow falling. There were several Halloweens from childhood you could recall trick-or-treating with a winter coat flung over your costume because the temperature had dropped below freezing.
You, Noelle and Irene showed up to Paulo’s house around 8:00 PM, shivering a little while you stood on his doorstep. Paulo was one of the few freshmen who lived off-campus, having known several upperclassmen before he came to Russet. The brownstone he lived in was cute, with window boxes you imagined hosted flowers in the summer.
Tugging your pink and black minidress down, you adjusted your bow as Paulo opened the door.
Blinking, he took in your costumes. “The Powerpuff girls!” He cheered, raising an arm overhead. “Try not to take down any of the villains upstairs, yeah?”
“No promises,” said Irene, flicking hair over her shoulder.
Entering the house, you heard thumping bass from an apartment upstairs. Paulo lived on the third floor and as you climbed the steps, the music grew louder. It took Paulo two tries to shove open the door – “warped wood,” he explained – but once you were inside, you saw familiar faces.
“The Powerpuff girls!” Jasmine cried, jumping up from the couch. “Finally! Thank god – can you take down Eamon? He came here dressed as a potato, or something.”
“It’s an avocado!” Eamon shouted from the kitchen. He was dressed in a round, green costume with a halo overhead. “I’m ‘holy guacamole’ – get it?” he said, pointing at the halo.
Jasmine stared at him a moment. “That’s terrible. Worse than mine,” she said with a wave down her body. “I’ve been Princess Jasmine for the past five Halloweens. It’s easy to remember and I already have the outfit.”
Laughing, you shrugged off your coat and added this to a pile on the couch. “It’s a classic,” you agreed as you turned.
Noelle had managed to procure at least twenty tickets to the party tonight, so a lot of your freshman Russet class was in attendance. Including Sabrina, who stood in the corner, talking to Louis over cups of red punch. She looked up when you entered, pausing before she gave a small wave. Surprised by the gesture, you did the same.
“No.” Noelle groaned, coming to a stop alongside you. When you looked, you saw she’d already removed her coat. “Tell me Sabrina didn’t come to this party dressed as a ballerina.”
“We did invite her at the last minute,” you laughed. “Hard to find a good Halloween costume in a day.”
“Hey,” Noelle argued. “There’s no we here. You were the one who invited her, and you’ll be the one to accept the consequences should your social experiment fail.”
“Done,” you agreed. “Speaking of social experiments though, I’m ready to get drunk tonight. Where’s the alcohol?”
“Kitchen!” Irene called, brushing past. “Or – that’s where Brian disappeared to when we entered, so I can only assume.”
Telling Noelle you’d be back with drinks, you wound through the room towards where Irene had pointed. The kitchen was tiny, on par with most city apartments. There was only room enough for one or two people, so you were lucky it was deserted when you entered.
Surveying the counter, you found the usual party staples. A bowl of red punch, a bunch of beer and various liquor bottles with chasers. Skipping over the communal punch bowl, you reached for a bottle of diet coke and coconut rum.
“Oh,” a voice said as they entered the kitchen. “Sorry – I didn’t know you were in here.”
Glancing up, you saw Jimin and froze.
He’d dyed his hair black – that was the first thing you noticed. Jimin’s hair was no longer blonde, but completely dark. His outfit confused you at first – a frilly, white blouse with slicked-back hair and dark trousers – until you saw his bright red contacts and the dribble of blood at his mouth.
“A vampire,” you said, finally recovering your voice. Scanning his body, you frowned. “Where are the teeth, though?”
Jimin blinked, his gaze jerking up from your waist.
“Huh?” he said, sounding a bit strangled.
Cheeks heating a little – your dress was pretty short – you repeated yourself. “The teeth,” you said, pointing at your own lips. “Don’t vampires have fangs?”
“Oh, right.” Jimin dug around in his pocket – fuck, were his trousers tight – to produce twin fangs. “I took them off when I got here. They’re really hard to talk in.”
“Go on then, Park,” you said with a grin. “Put them in.”
“One second.” Twisting to face the wall, Jimin popped them in his mouth. Turning around, he bared his teeth. “Sexy?”
With the teeth in though, the word came out more like shex-shie and you burst into laughter. “So sexy,” you agreed, reaching past him for a cup.
Jimin stiffened when your arm brushed his front. Unbidden, you thought about what Noelle had said – Jimin had been flirting with you. Pulling away, you resumed making your drinks and tried not to look in his direction.
Even so, you remained aware of his presence. Jimin inched his way behind you, reaching for the whiskey on the other side. His arm brushed your elbow as he went, right knee nudging yours in an intimate gesture.
Glancing up from the counter, you accidentally caught his gaze. Despite your earlier joking, he did look sexy. Devastatingly so. Even the blood-red contacts weren’t enough to deter the shiver which ran down your spine.
Shaking yourself free from your trance, you grabbed both cups and pulled back. 
“So, what’re you drinking?” you asked. 
You decided it was best to steer the conversation away from how sexy Park Jimin was or was not.
Seemingly oblivious to your inner turmoil, Jimin poured whiskey into his cup. “Whiskey and coke. Can you pass me that bottle?”
“Sure,” you said, leaping at the chance to prevent him from walking past you again. “Here you go.”
Pushing this forward, you watched Jimin pour both drinks all the way to the brim. He paused near the end, staring into the depths before he looked up. He seemed to be warring with something, debating whether or not to speak whatever was on his mind.
“So…” He paused. “Do you know Jungkook, or something?”
You blinked. “Jungkook…?”
“You know, Miss Luna’s assistant. Jeon Jungkook.”
“Oh! Jungkook. No, I don’t really know him.”
“You were talking to him at the end of class, though?”
Hearing the curiosity in his voice, both your brows raised. “And?”
“And nothing,” Jimin said, sounding uncomfortable. “I just… I didn’t know you knew him, that’s all.”
“I mean, I don’t.” You paused. “But even if I did, what does it matter?”
“It doesn’t.” His cheeks began to redden. “It’s just – ah, never mind. We don’t have that great a history, that’s all. He’s kind of the reason I’m at Russet this year.”
You stared at Jimin a moment. “Wow, what a tragedy,” you said, stifling a laugh. “To have been forced to attend one of the most prestigious dance institutions in the world.”
His upper lip twitched. “It’s not that. I was deciding between attending Russet and accepting a job offer out west. I was asked to join this pop star on tour… anyways, Jungkook’s never liked me much. It’s a long story.” Jimin’s brow furrowed. “My offer was rescinded at the last minute. The artist never said why, but I always got the feeling he had something to do with it.”
You stared at Jimin a moment, unsure how to respond. Jungkook hadn’t seemed like that kind of person, but you supposed you’d only talked to him for a few minutes. If that was true, what happened to Jimin sucked and yet, the next words from your mouth nearly had you face-palming.
“And here I thought I was your biggest rival, Park,” you said.
Jimin’s eyes widened. “Are you… jealous, Y/N?”
He sounded almost pleased by the notion, which sent a different kind of shiver down your spine.
“Not at all,” you said quickly, turning back to your drinks.
Jimin made a soft tsk-ing sound, as though he didn’t believe you.
“That sucks,” you continued, determined to change the subject. “I’m sorry that happened to you.”
“Yeah. Maybe it was all for the best, though. Things happen for a reason, right?”
Looking up, you caught Jimin’s stare. He didn’t look immediately away and you got the oddest sensation he meant more than what he said. Hastily, you pushed this feeling aside, clutching your drinks as you entered the main room. Jimin followed close behind, two cups in his hands.
“When did you get here?” you asked. “Been here long?”
Jimin shook his head. “Nah. Hoseok and I got here like, ten minutes ago. He should be around here somewhere, he –”
“Y/N!”
You looked up just in time to see Hoseok, Jimin’s roommate, barreling towards you.
“It’s been so long!” Crushing you to his chest, Hoseok wrapped you in a hug. “Hope Jimin isn’t boring you to death,” he stage-whispered before he pulled away.
“Just for that.” Jimin arched a brow. “Both these drinks are for me.”
“No – wait, wait. I’m sorry!” Hoseok pouted. “Hand over the drink, Park. It’s been the longest fucking week.”
Jimin grinned and relented, handing Hoseok his cup as you laughed. Hoseok was a newer friend, but he was close to Jimin, so he’d gradually bled into your latest gatherings. Despite not being on the ballet track, most of the dancers at Russet knew of him. Hoseok had that way about him.
Glancing down at your outfit, Hoseok held up a finger. “Let me guess – Blossom,” he said, turning to scan the room. “Which means… aha! Irene is Bubbles and Noelle is Buttercup. Makes sense.”
“And you are…” Pausing, you squinted at his outfit. “Someone at the spa?”
“Sure.” Hoseok shrugged. “Honestly, I just wanted to wear a bathrobe.”
Said bathrobe was paired with only boxers, the front of the robe open to display his toned abs. The costume didn’t surprise you, based on past interactions with Hoseok.
Casually, he twirled the robe tie in a circle. “Impressive, no?” Hoseok glanced away. “Whoa, wait – they have beer pong? See you all later!”
Hurrying off, he left you alone with Jimin. Shaking your head, you glanced in his direction and saw Jimin down his whole drink. Arching a brow, you were about to ask why when Irene called your names from across the room.
“Y/N!” She waved her hands. “Jimin! Get over here, you two – we need more for flip cup!”
You found yourself pulled in this direction despite your insistence you didn’t do well under pressure. Jimin ended up at the other end of the table and you lost sight of him when you started to play, paired with Jasmine for a partner.
By the end of the first round, you discovered you weren’t as horrible a player as you’d imagined. Then someone suggested mixed drinks for the second round, and things became fuzzier. There were more people present than just current students of Russet. One of Paulo’s roommates knew Seokjin, so you saw him in the room, along with Sana.
You chatted with both over the course of the evening, in addition to a guy who’d recently debuted on Broadway, Kim Taehyung. Apparently, there was already buzz around him for a Tony. Taehyung was nice, but it was sometime during this conversation you realized how tipsy you were. Apparently, not drinking for several months and then going ham made for very low tolerance.
Collapsing onto the couch, you joined Irene and Brian’s conversation. In the corner of your eye, you caught sight of Noelle – a terrible flip cup player, she’d roped Hoseok into giving her private lessons, but these seemed to be going terribly. Or perhaps very well, given how much the two of them were laughing.
You completely forgot about Jimin until you spotted him across the room talking to Sabrina. Seeing them together, you straightened. Both seemed fairly comfortable, which struck you as odd. Since that morning in Jimin’s dorm, you hadn’t really seen them hang out together.
Despite this, Jimin was laughing at something Sabrina had said. Tearing your gaze away, you forced yourself to focus on the conversation at hand. It didn’t matter who Jimin spoke to, or even who he decided to go home with tonight. He was your dance partner and friend, nothing more and besides – you had a boyfriend.
Blinking, you reached into your clutch and pulled out your phone. To your disappointment, you’d gotten no texts from Finn since this morning. You assumed he was still at his party but didn’t know for sure. Shooting him a text, hey, you waited for a response and when you got none, returned your phone to your purse.
Across the room, you heard Noelle yell your name. “Y/N!” She cupped her mouth with both hands. “We need another person for flip cup!”
Laughing, you pushed yourself from the couch and were immediately roped into your fourth game of the night. The night blurred again after that, turning into a pleasant hum of conversation and booze. At some point, Ubers were called to bring you to the club. As you rushed downstairs, you realized you forgot your coat as soon as you stepped outside.
Shivering violently, you rubbed your arms and cursed yourself for poor foresight.
“Y/N?” Jimin came to a stop alongside you. “Hey, where’s your coat?”
“Inside,” you said through chattering teeth. “I-it’s fine, though. I’m fine!”
Jimin gave you a look. “Where’s Paulo?” he said, glancing around. “I’ll grab him, we can get your coat before we go –”
“The Uber’s already here, though,” you argued, grabbing his sleeve to drag him towards the curb. “I’ll be fine from here to the club!”
Jimin sighed but gave in, following when you rushed to the grey SUV. Irene had claimed the front seat, so you and Jimin pulled open the middle door – Noelle and Hoseok were crowding behind you, so you and Jimin ended up together in the backseat.
Collapsed in a heap, you giggled as Jimin tried to squish himself in a corner. “Sorry,” he said, trying – and failing – to keep his knees separate.
“Jimin.” You snorted. “Are we going to go through this again? Your hands have been in way more inappropriate places than that this semester.”
Jimin’s lips parted, shocked, but you were already hoisting yourself over the middle seat. Draping your arms next to Noelle, you begged her to play your favorite song on the radio. Had you been more sober, you might’ve recognized your position to be precarious – perched on the edge of your seat, your ass hovered inches away from Jimin’s face.
Plopping back down, you glanced sideways at Jimin and found him frozen. Suddenly, you realized the visual he’d had.
“Um, so what happened to the teeth?” you blurted, determined to change the subject.
Jimin blinked and managed to meet your gaze. “Casualty of flip cup,” he said. “One of them fell out during the game and I couldn’t find where it rolled.”
“Well, that’s okay. You can just be one of those vampires who blend in with normal humans. You know, the kind whose fangs only come out when they want to bite someone.”
“That’s true.” Jimin arched a brow. “Lucky for you, I’m not hungry.”
“Lucky for me? Lucky for you,” you retorted. “My blood is about half alcohol right now. If you drank my blood, you’d be a very silly vampire.”
The idea of a silly vampire made you laugh – even more so when you pictured said vampire as Jimin. He seemed much too coherent for your liking right now.
“A silly vampire, huh?” Jimin looked on, amused. “Damn, Y/N – when was the last time you went out? Your tolerance is shit.”
“I know,” you sighed. “I haven’t drunk much this semester. Too much dance, too little time. I think the last time I went out was –”
“We’re here!” squealed Noelle, throwing open the door.
A blast of cold air hit you and you shivered, wishing you’d worn your coat. Jimin’s gaze remained steady on yours.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” he said lowly. “I can give you, uh…”
“Your shirt?” you said dryly, lifting a brow as you brushed past. “Then you’d be shirtless, Park. Let’s think this through.”
Jimin chuckled before he followed suit, although you cursed as soon as you left the car. He was correct. It was freezing, even with your alcohol-induced blanket.
“Come on!” you yelped, following Noelle towards the entrance.
Bypassing the line, Noelle walked straight towards the bouncer and showed him her phone. He nodded and waved her past, counting your friend group who followed. Not everyone from Paulo’s place had gone to the club, but enough for you to make quite the entrance.
“Y/N!” Noelle doubled back to link arms with you. “Come on – this way! That guy’s going to show us to our table.”
“Table?” you asked her, wide-eyed.
Tables in a club on Halloween night were ridiculously expensive, but it seemed Noelle had downplayed her brother’s connections. Your group was led right to the front of the upper balcony, getting a coveted spot overlooking the dance floor below.
This was undeniably the coolest club you’d been in. Not that you’d been in many, mind you, but this one had to take the cake. A half-circle of tables took up the top floor, with twin staircases descending to the main room below. Most of the lower floor was for dancing, although you saw additional tables pushed to the sides. Fluorescent bars and dance platforms were dotted throughout and above all was the DJ booth, blasting the latest songs.
“Whoa,” you breathed.
Noelle grinned, squeezing your arm to pull you into the booth. As soon as you settled in, Jasmine leapt up and clapped her hands.
“I want to be in one of those!” she said, pointing to a glowing cage at the center of the dance floor.
“Oo, me too!” Irene leapt up to join her.
“Me, three!” said Paulo, clambering out of the booth.
“Awesome.” Irene beamed and glanced your way. “What about you, Y/N? You in?”
The idea was tempting for a moment, but then Finn flashed through your mind. You highly doubted he’d be on board with you gyrating for a room full of strangers without him. Somewhat dejectedly, you plopped back on the bench.
“That’s okay,” you sighed. “I think I’m going to stay here for a while. I’ll join you later!”
Irene frowned but nodded, following the rest when they left for the stairs. About half the group went, clearing out the table while you stared at the dance floor.
Jimin slid into the bench alongside you. “You don’t want to dance?”
Startled, you glanced in his direction. While you watched, Jimin began to undo his cuffs, casually rolling the sleeves of his shirt. His hair, which had been slicked back at the start of the night, was starting to fall. Several dark strands hung over his forehead, although this only seemed to make the look more appealing.
“No,” you said, crossing your legs. “I just… don’t really feel like it.”
“Is this the whole hating clubs thing again?”
“Kind of.” You laughed. “I don’t know. Club dancing isn’t like normal dancing, you know?”
“It is when you’re at the club with all dancers,” Jimin pointed out, nodding towards the floor.
Following his gaze, you saw Jasmine dancing full-out in a lit-up cage. She wasn’t so much gyrating as she was creating choreography on the fly. The mere mortals around her looked on in awe. Fighting a smile, you returned to Jimin.
“Okay, that does look like fun,” you admitted. “The last time I was at a club was with Finn.”
Jimin blinked. “Sorry – what?”
“In the cab,” you said, leaning closer in order to be heard. “You asked me when I last went out. It was that night… um, the night you came and picked me up.”
Jimin stared at you a moment, as though contemplating something important. Abruptly, he stood and held out a hand. You blinked at this like he’d offered a football.
“What are you doing?” you said, glancing up.
“Taking you down to the dance floor.” Jimin retracted said hand. “Come on, Y/N! You don’t have to give out dry lap dances, or whatever.”
“Hey!” In disbelief, your mouth fell open. “You said you’d forget all about that!”
His smile turned impish. “Seriously, we can just do the sprinkler, or something. It’ll be fun!”
“The sprinkler?” Starting to laugh, you stood. “Was that really the first move you thought of?”
“Nah. My go-to move is the criss-cross, but I figured this was more your speed.”
Snorting, you shoved him in the arm before following Jimin to the dance floor. It didn’t take you long to spot your other friends, clustered near the front and around the DJ booth.
“Y/N!” Noelle cheered, breaking off from the pack. “You made it!”
She nearly spilled her drink while she danced, catching herself just in time as she spun around. You grinned, entering the circle with Jimin by your side. He did, in fact, pull out the criss-cross – Hoseok joined in and soon, there was a Fortnite dance battle between them. You truly haven’t lived until you’ve seen a TikTok dance-off between two semi-professional dancers.
This ended with both declaring mutual defeat, and Hoseok disappearing to buy the next round. Noelle shimmied her way over to Jasmine, accepting the hand given to stand on the platform.
You laughed at their ridiculous dance moves, choosing instead to stay on the ground. The crowd around you had thinned since you’d joined. Eamon disappeared a few minutes later, saying something about needing a drink upstairs. Before long, Irene had joined Jasmine and Noelle on the platform, leaving you alone with Jimin on the floor.
Under other circumstances, you might have felt uncomfortable, but Jimin was so good at putting you at ease. Determined to keep you in the present, he came up with more and more complicated dance moves which had you snorting with laughter.
On a particularly flamboyant spin, Jimin accidentally smacked the drink from someone’s grasp. Blue vodka splattered everywhere, drenching its owner – a burly man in leather who snarled in frustration.
Looking up, he met your gaze and his eyes narrowed.
“Shit. Run!” you blurted out.
Grabbing Jimin by the arm, you dragged him into the crowd.
“No, wait – let me apologize!” Jimin tried to twist around. “I can pay for his drink! I can –”
Once there was suitable distance between you and the guy, you came to a stop. Laughing so hard you nearly fell over, you turned sideways to face him.
Bodies pressed against you from every side but rather than feel claustrophobic, all you could think about was Jimin before you. His hair had become thoroughly mussed during the night and you fought the sudden desire to smooth it down.
Although your breath came hard, the club around you seemed to slow. The music somehow had narrowed to pinpricks, a heady thump of bass while everything dulled.
What you should’ve done was taken a step back – but you didn’t.
Instead, your gaze drifted across his face. Jimin stared back, something intense to his gaze you couldn’t quite name. Breath caught in your throat, his eyes dropped to your lips.
Before you could react, someone bumped into you from behind, sending you careening forward. Jimin caught you easily, one arm around your waist and your chest pressed to his. You could feel every hard line of his body, his thigh wedged between your legs while you grasped at his arms. Heart thudding traitorously against your ribcage, you tried to ignore the emotions which followed.
It was impossible. 
The song playing was slower, sexier than the one which had inspired the dance-off. Without meaning to, your weight subtly shifted. This caused your hips to move against his as Jimin quietly sucked in a breath. The effect this had on him was instantaneous. His grip on you tightened, gaze heady with desire and something more. Before you could second-guess what you were doing, you moved your hips again – this time, on purpose.
Jimin’s eyes darkened. Without looking away, his grip on you tightened as he slowly dragged you up his thigh. Suddenly breathless, your hands gripped him tighter while your eyes fluttered shut. The heat of his body on yours, the faint smell of cologne and sweat, the tension in his limbs and the knowledge of what he could do to you – it all left your head spinning.
“Y/N,” Jimin murmured, low in your ear.
You weren’t used to him saying your name like that.
You were used to him saying your name in every other way, but not that. Sharp with dancer’s critique, brusque with instruction, light with teasing – but not like something heavy was lodged in his throat. Maybe his heart.
Panicked, your eyes flew open.
What were you doing? This wasn’t some random stranger and this sure as hell wasn’t your boyfriend. This was Jimin. Stumbling backwards, you broke from his hold. Jimin seemed equally stunned, staring at you on the dance floor.
“I have to go,” you blurted and whirled around.
Shoving into the crowd, you heard Jimin emit a soft groan. Despite this, he didn’t immediately pursue, for which you were grateful. Stumbling through strangers, strobe lights flashed brightly overhead. You squeezed between someone dressed as a go-go and another person dressed as a werewolf. Skidding to a stop on the edge of the floor, you scanned the room and saw no one from Russet.
When you glanced over your shoulder, you saw Jimin now followed. Panicking again, you began to move. Beside one of the bars, you spotted a hallway labeled restrooms. Heading in this direction, you quickly disappeared inside the door marked women.
Once inside, you locked yourself in a stall, lowered the lid and sat down. Head in hands, you slowly exhaled. You were a coward; that much was clear. Jimin was probably out there looking for you right now, but you’d rather hide in a bathroom than face him.
The fluorescent lighting overhead was too bright – it made you feel overexposed. After a long moment, you fished around in your purse and pulled out your phone. Flipping to your thread with Finn, you saw he’d sent no response since your text. Complete and utter silence.
Heart cracking a little, you slid this in your bag and stared at the door. This wasn’t how things were supposed to go. When you imagined you and Finn at college, you’d always pictured you together, attending the same parties and sharing the same adventures. Tonight though, had proven to be anything but that. Finn hadn’t once glanced at his phone judging by the unread mark next to your text.
Dimly, you wondered why you weren’t more upset about this. It should bother you that Finn hadn’t called or even texted throughout the day. Sure, he was out with friends, but so were you and you’d reached out – as soon as you thought this, your heart sank.
You weren’t sure you could call Jimin a friend after what had just happened.
Sure, you’d only danced, and it had only been for a second but still, guilt bloomed behind your ribcage. The idea of Finn doing the same thing with anyone else made your heart twist. You wouldn’t feel that way if what you’d done wasn’t wrong.
Groaning out loud, you lowered your head to your hands. After several minutes, you felt calm enough to stand and pretend-flush the toilet. As you exited the stall, you walked to the sink and began washing your hands. Staring at yourself in the mirror, a million things ran through your mind.
Clearly, the situation with Jimin was worse than you’d thought. The spark you’d felt kept returning, no matter how much you tried to ignore it. Maybe the only solution was to find a new partner. The very idea made your heart sink, but you couldn’t deny things had gotten out of hand.
Before you could seriously consider the option, the door to the bathroom flung open and banged against the wall. Sabrina stormed in, wiping both eyes with the heel of her hand. You froze, staring at her in the mirror but she didn’t seem to notice your presence.
When she finally lowered her hands and took a deep breath, she saw you and froze.
For a moment, you both only stared at each other and then – you coughed. Awkwardly, you began to dry your hands.
“Are you okay?” you asked, tentative.
Sabrina stiffened. “I’m fine,” she muttered, walking to the sink.
You watched her wash her hands, struggling and failing to control her expression. Sabrina’s hair was a mess and you stared, wondering where she’d been. You hadn’t seen her since you’d entered the club, but had assumed she’d stayed on the second floor.
“Are you sure?” you pressed, remembering your night at the other club. “You know, you can –”
“Will you… just stop.” Sabrina closed her eyes. “Will you … stop pretending like we’re friends, or something?”
Struck with disbelief, you could only stare. “I… are you serious?”
“Yes.”
“Wow.” You shook your head. “Just wow.”
Her lips tightened and finally, she whirled around. “What?” Sabrina demanded. “What is it?”
The look in her eyes was familiar. Her frustrated, angry look was mirrored in your expression, but you found you didn’t care. Sabrina was clearly going through something, but her rudeness to you was the final straw. Tired from Finn, Jimin and the constant pressure you were both under, something about Sabrina’s words made you break.
“Why are you always such a… such a bitch,” you blurted, hurling the word like a knife. “What did I ever do to you? Why do you always act like you hate me so much?”
Sabrina’s upper lip curled. “Why do you always think this is about you, Y/N? Maybe I just wanted one second of peace and instead, here you are. Like always.”
“Here I am, in the public restroom of a club we’re all at?”
“No. Here you are in my life,” she snapped, pushing herself from the sink. “People won’t talk to me? It’s because you’ve run your mouth about things you think I’ve done. I’m falling in the class ranks? It’s because you’re after my spot. Jimin doesn’t want to be my partner? It’s because of his feelings for you. I’m sick of turning around and always seeing you there!”
“Okay, but none of those things – I, Jimin doesn’t have feelings for me,” you sputtered.
Sabrina gave you a look. “Oh, please, Y/N.” Her laughter was harsh. “Why else would he turn me down?”
“Um, maybe because he’s a decent human being? Unlike yourself.”
“Great, yeah.” Sabrina glared. “Make me the bad guy again.”
“I’m not the one doing that,” you huffed. “You are. You want to blame me because no one wants to be your friend? Maybe try reaching out first. Maybe don’t talk shit about people behind their backs. And I’m improving because I’m taking extra lessons. No thanks to you, of course.”
“Don’t try and make me feel bad because I didn’t have time to give you lessons.”
“I’m not trying to make you feel bad. I’m trying to explain why I’m improving and you’re not.”
Sabrina bristled. “Are you saying I don’t work hard, too?”
“No.” Mirthless, you laughed. “I know you work hard – maybe even as hard as I do. But you know what the big difference is between you and me?” you said, drawing yourself to your full height.
Sabrina’s eyes glimmered while she stared you down. Still, she retained her aloofness when she said, “What? What’s the big secret?”
“You think everyone’s out to get you,” you said, stepping closer. “You think not asking for help makes you stronger, but it’s the exact opposite. At least I’ve improved since the start of the year. What have you done?”
Not waiting for an answer, you pushed past Sabrina and walked out the door.
Shoving it wide, you entered the hallway. Dance music flooded your senses and you winced, remembering where you were and what you’d been doing. Luckily, Jimin was nowhere in sight. He must not have seen where you’d disappeared to.
Shoulders slumping, you pulled out your phone and dialed a number. Walking to the front, you concentrated on breathing while you waited for them to pick up. Coming to a stop beside coat check, you didn’t leave the club – a lesson you’d learned the hard way.
Noelle answered on the third ring. “Babe?” she yelled, barely audible over the din. “What’s going on? Where are you?”
“Are you…” Closing your eyes, you paused. “Can we leave?”
Noelle paused, then muffled her phone with one hand. “Irene!” you heard her yell. “You good to get a ride home for these people? Okay, cool. Bye!” Her phone became un-muffled. “Where are you, babe?”
After explaining your location, you hung up and hugged yourself with both arms. Noelle burst into view a few moments later, scanning the crowd like a mom on a mission. When she saw you, she rushed over – and you promptly burst into tears.
“Oh, no!” Pulling you into a hug, Noelle began to rub your back. “No, no, babe! Don’t cry! What’s going on? Do I need to kick someone’s ass?”
Hearing Jimin’s words said by Noelle only made you cry harder. Wisely sensing this to be a problem not easily solved, Noelle continued rubbing your back while walking towards the exit.
The two of you went outside and, as luck would have it, saw a group of people arriving at the club. Noelle snagged their taxi, helping you in the backseat and giving the driver your address. As you settled against her, your head on her shoulder, Noelle kept rubbing your arm and waited for the tears to stop.
You weren’t really sure why you were crying.
Of course, Sabrina was terrible, as was the situation with Jimin, but it was more than that. Dancing with Jimin hadn’t caused problems in your relationship with Finn. There had been problems in your relationship Finn and so, feelings had crept in which led you to dance with Jimin.
More than that though, you couldn’t help but notice Noelle had come to your aid much faster than Finn ever had. Even Jimin had dropped everything when you asked, and he was someone you’d once called your enemy. Noelle had been having fun, but she’d cut her night short because you were upset. This knowledge crushed you and for the very first time, you realized your relationship with Finn might be unfixable.
Curled up on the backseat, you let yourself cry a bit more. You could be calm and rational in the morning, you decided but for now, you just felt defeated.
When you finally climbed into bed at your dorm at night, you looked at your phone and saw Finn still hadn’t texted.
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Author’s Note: Thank you for reading! 😊 New chapters of Raise the Barre are posted weekly; dates are listed on the series Master List. Requests for updates will be deleted.
RAISE THE BARRE MASTERLIST 
© kpopfanfictrash, 2020. Do not copy or repost without permission.
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ncssian · 4 years ago
Text
A Favor: Part Seventeen
Nessian Modern AU
Masterlist
a/n: 70% of this fic is written on my phone lying on my side in bed while using swipe typing bc im too lazy to type out words and it shows
TW: discussion of SA
***
Nesta has an easier time adjusting to a third person in the cabin than she thought she would. Maybe it’s because Azriel indeed minds his business, and half the time Nesta isn’t aware he’s there at all.
Cassian seems to be more irritated by it than anyone else—not his brother, of course, but the fact that he and Nesta no longer exist in their own little bubble. Which is how he ends up at Nesta’s apartment with an overnight bag, sprawled out stomach-down on her mattress while she gets ready for bed.
“TV show or movie?” he asks, clicking through her laptop. Shows are Nesta’s thing and movies are Cassian’s; she feels generous enough tonight to say, “Movie.”
“Thank god,” he mutters, typing something on the laptop. “There’s a Turkish horror flick that I was saving for you.”
“Where do you even find these films?” Grabbing her hairbrush, she flops onto the bed beside him and starts brushing out her brassy locks. Before he can answer, Nesta’s phone buzzes from the stool she uses as a bedside table. Feyre’s name flashes on the screen.
Nesta frowns, but picks up without a second thought. “What is it?”
“Nothing serious,” her sister replies. “Just checking in.”
Before Cassian, Nesta didn’t very much understand the purpose of “checking in” without reason. Now she empathizes with Feyre a little. “I’m fine,” she says.
Deciding she can do better than that, she adds, “Cassian and I are about to start a movie.”
“Is it his choice? I’m so sorry for you.”
Nesta peeks over to where Cassian is still intently searching for his obscure movie and smiles a little. “I like Turkish horror,” she replies.
Cassian overhears and grins approvingly.
“Well, I’m looking at wedding dresses with Rhys so he can prepare for when he inevitably proposes,” Feyre says. “In case you wanted to know.”
Nesta did not particularly want to know, but she doesn’t say this. “Sounds fun. Is that it?”
“For what?”
“This conversation.”
Feyre sighs over the line. “Yes, I’ll let you go now. Thanks for picking up.”
The bar is in hell, Nesta thinks. Mostly because she put it there, but she still feels embarrassed to be congratulated over such small things. “Thanks for keeping it short.”
She’s about to hang up when she hears a male voice speak up in the background, and Feyre interrupts, “Wait—before you go, can you tell Cassian to call Rhys back? He wants Cass’s help picking a new team leader for the Italy project.”
Nesta has no idea what that is, but she says, “Sure, fine.” They say their goodbyes and hang up.
“What’d she want?” Cassian says without looking over at her.
“She said Rhys wants you to call him about the Italy project.”
Cassian turns toward her, half sitting up. “Really? What for?”
“Something about picking a team leader.” She returns to brushing her hair. “Why? What’s the Italy project?”
“Something I thought we put aside for good,” he grumbles. “It’s a year-long overseas project in Milan. Rhys thinks it’s gonna bring in a shit ton of money.”
“Sounds big. What do you have to do with it, though?” She’s never heard of Cassian being involved in Night Court’s international operations, even though he takes on more work than the usual employee.
Cassian shrugs, going back to movie searching. “He wanted me to be the one leading the team, and I guess he still feels petty about me turning him down. Honestly, choosing team leaders outside of my department isn’t even part of my jurisdiction.”
Nesta hesitates. “He offered you the job? When?” She didn’t know this.
“On New Year’s.”
“And you turned it down?”
“Yeah.” Cassian clicks on a link that looks like it’ll plant fifteen different viruses in Nesta’s laptop. “Found the movie,” he says.
“Why would you do that?” Nesta demands.
“The movie?”
“The job offer! Why would you turn down such a big opportunity without even telling me?”
Cassian laughs in confusion. “Are you angry right now?”
She’s astonished at his nonchalance. “Cassian,” she says. “It’s Italy.”
Italy with the art and history and seaside beauty—it’s on their top five places to see before they die.
“It’s Milan,” he says like there’s a difference, “and it’s an entire year away from you.” He shakes his head, sitting up to face her. “Are you out of your mind?”
She goes still. “Don’t tell me you said no because of me.”
“Of course I said no because of you.”
“It’s your dream job!” she bursts. “Traveling, exploring, being on your own—”
“Those are our dreams. I made those plans with you. The hell am I supposed to do all the way in Italy without you?”
“You sound codependent,” she retorts.
He narrows his brows. “Like you wouldn’t do the same thing in my position?”
He’s right, of course. Nesta would do the exact same thing for him. But Nesta and Cassian are not the same, and they both know it. “You can’t make that comparison,” she sighs.
“Why not?” he demands.
“Because—” She struggles to put it into words. “I would give up a long distance job for you because it would be worth it. You’re worth it. It doesn’t work the other way around.”
“Again: why the fuck not?”
So he’s really going to make her spell it out. “Because you’re a good boyfriend. You’re affectionate and caring, you always go the extra mile for those you love, and you come with all these free perks. It’s a great deal. And I’m not anything terrible, but I’m the bare minimum compared to you. Why would you give up Italy for the bare minimum?”
Cassian looks at her in disbelief. “I don’t even know how you can say so many wrong things in a row.”
“He’s blinded by love,” Nesta mutters to herself.
“First of all,” he holds up a finger, “I don’t know where you learned to compare yourself to me, but I don’t like it. You make it sound like I need to be paid back for every half-decent thing I do, and that is not the case at all.”
“Of course you think that,” she says. “You wouldn’t be a good person if you didn’t.”
“Then let me be a blunt person.” He puts a hand on her knee and looks her in the eye. “You will never be like me. Very few people are; you can’t take it personally.”
“Oh my god.” Her eyes might roll out of her head.
“But you’re not the bare minimum. Not even close.” He states it like an undeniable fact.
“How so?” she challenges.
“Like how Elain told me about this boy who broke her heart in her high school, and how the next day he walked into class in a leg cast. And how she just knew you had something to do with it, and you two had a huge fight about it that lasted a week.”
Nesta does not enjoy that memory being brought up. Elain called her a psychopath for the incident, and to save her feelings, Nesta (rather unconvincingly) said it had been an accident.
“I didn’t push anybody into a creek,” she maintains the lie. “Sometimes people just fall down there.”
“To be fair, you’re a lot more stable now than you were then. Now when people hurt those you care about, you find sneakier ways to hurt them back. Don’t you?”
“I do not,” Nesta defends.
“Really? Because Eris texted me earlier saying you’ve been ignoring him since New Year’s, and he’s starting to get worried that you have something heinous planned for him. I asked him why he would ever think such a thing of you.” Cassian leans forward and rests his chin on her shoulder. “Why would he think such a thing of you, Nesta?”
Cassian looks pretty well off from here, doesn’t he? She remembers Eris’s smug face. Did you know Rhysand’s parents found him sleeping in the streets?
“Because he said a bad thing,” Nesta says, looking down at her fingernails. “And I have an unfortunate reputation at school for getting back at people who say bad things.” Like the time Brian O’Connell made jokes about a rape trial the class was studying, and then couldn’t find an internship at a single firm the following summer.
“And what did he say? Because I can’t imagine he would directly insult you. He actually likes you, ass that he is.” His face is warm so close to her neck.
She looks away. “I won’t repeat it.”
That seems to be all Cassian needs to get an idea of what Eris said. “And how long are you planning on holding it against him?”
“Forever.”
“That’s what I thought.”
Nesta meets the eyes that haven’t left her face this entire time and snorts. “What’s your point?” Seriously, she’s starting to redden at how close he is.
He buries his face in her neck, his stubble rasping against the sensitive skin there. “The point is that you also do a lot for the people you love. Just in a different way.” He pulls away to look her in the eye. “Don’t do anything to Eris, though,” he says. “Not that I care for him or his shit opinions, but whatever you have planned isn’t worth it.”
Nesta wants to scoff in disbelief at the sincerity on Cassian’s face. He’s always choosing kindness, even at the worst moments. “So that’s your argument?” she says. “You won’t go to Italy because your girlfriend has a bad temper and a taste for revenge?”
“That’s my final argument, Your Honor.” He takes her hand. “Forget Milan, will you? One day I’ll take you to Portofino.”
The longer Nesta knows Cassian, the more she finds it useless to hide from him. Which is why she lets him watch the thoughts flit across her face as she considers his words, deciding whether she believes him. Deciding whether he’s right to give her so much devotion.
“Fine,” she finally says. “You’re right.”
A slow smile spreads across his face as he realizes he won. Wrapping his arms around Nesta’s waist and legs, he hauls her into his lap and shifts around until they’re both comfortable. The movie is forgotten for now.
“Out of curiosity…” He noses at the nape of her neck. “What did Eris say about me to make you so angry?”
When Nesta doesn’t answer, he says, “I’ve already heard everything that could possibly be said. The shit that used to get me when I was eighteen doesn’t have the same hold on me a decade later.”
She lets herself relax into his hold. “It was about the time you spent as an orphan.” Technically, he’s still an orphan, but it was different back then. “I didn’t like the tone of his voice.”
Cassian’s answering hum is a low rumble against her shirt. “Did you know my biological father was from Italy?”
Nesta perks up at that. “No.” She assumed he was entirely Algerian, even though he and Azriel probably look ethnically ambiguous to most. “Isn’t that all the more reason to see Italy someday?”
“Not at all,” he says. “If I could pretend that half of me didn’t exist, I would.”
She can’t think of a response that doesn’t involve a question, so she doesn’t reply. She waits for Cassian to speak on his own terms.
“I went to Italy once,” he admits. “For less than a day while my brothers were partying in Monte Carlo. I was young and stupid, and thought I would never be complete if I didn’t know who my father was.”
“Who was he?” She doesn’t know why she’s whispering.
“No one worth remembering,” Cassian says, his arms unconsciously tightening around her. “I put some dots together and realized how he and my mother must have met, how he must’ve—forced himself on her, and I decided that I didn’t care about bloodlines at all. I never returned to Italy after that.”
Nesta’s hands want to reach out and touch him, soothe him. But her muscles are suddenly very cold, and she can only stiffen. “And what about now? Do you… not want to go back?”
“It’s just a place to me,” he says. “Nothing special, nothing terrible. But I like the way it sounds when you talk about it.” His eyes sparkle. “I’d like to pretend it’s my first time going with you.”
“Alright, then.” She nods. “One day, we’ll go together. It’ll be our first time.”
***
Cassian refuses to let Nesta leave bed the next morning, dragging his heavy mouth across her body whenever she tries to get up. She’s about to surrender to him altogether when her phone starts vibrating loudly, insistently.
Breaking away from Cassian’s attempt at cuddling, she answers without checking the caller ID. “Yes?” she croaks sleepily.
“Where the hell have you been?” Emerie demands.
Nesta shoves Cassian away despite his protests, untangling her legs from the sheets. “At home,” she says, getting out of bed and heading for the bathroom. “Am I supposed to be somewhere else?”
“We haven’t seen you in two weeks,” Emerie says. “Gwyn thought your boyfriend’s weird family killed you.”
“That’s not what happened,” Nesta assures, pulling her shorts down and sitting on the toilet. “I just needed some alone time.” People are all around her these days, it seems. Her body still can’t quite adjust to it.
“Well, have you had enough—are you peeing?”
“Yeah.” She wipes and flushes the toilet.
“Well, clear your day and kick your sorry boyfriend out of your place. I can’t remember the last time I went out.”
“Why does everybody always want to go out?” Nesta says as she washes her hands. “What’s wrong with staying in, being safe, never leaving the house?” She dries her hands on a towel and returns to the bedroom, where Cassian is now sitting up and checking his emails.
“You’re preaching to the choir, but this actually wasn’t my idea,” Emerie says.
Nesta and Cassian alert at the sound of a knock from the front door. Nesta never has uninvited guests.
“Hold on a second, Em,” she says, jogging up the short set of steps to the door. She opens it to the sight of an exasperated-looking Gwyn.
“Jeez, next time send a text that you’re alive, will you?” Gwyn says, shoving past Nesta to enter the apartment. “Do you know how worried I’ve been—” She halts midsentence, one foot hovering above a step as she realizes that Nesta isn’t alone. As she sees Cassian in her bed, bare-chested and highly amused.
“Hey.” He raises a hand in greeting.
Gwyn pales.
“Hello?” Emerie calls over the line.
“You girls both share the same brain,” Nesta sighs. “Let me call you back, Emerie.”
Gwyn whirls around just as Nesta hangs up. “That won’t be necessary,” she says quickly, looking embarrassed. “I’ll be outside. I’m sorry.”
She hurries out of the apartment even faster than she came in, ducking her head to hide her face.
Nesta tosses her arms up in the air. “Great,” she says to Cassian. “Your abs scared her away.”
“But I didn’t do anything—”
She shuts the door behind her as she follows Gwyn outside, barefoot and all. She barely notices the freezing cold air or the awful press of damp grass beneath her feet as she catches up to Gwyn and grabs her elbow. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
Gwyn jerks suddenly, yanking out of Nesta’s hold. Her breathing seems a little shallow, and she looks even more embarrassed for it. “It’s nothing. I just didn’t know you had someone over.”
“Cassian? He’s cool, you don’t need to be weird about him,” she tries to reassure Gwyn. “Though I did use to tell him that not everybody wants to see him shirtless all the time.”
“It’s not that,” Gwyn says, waving her off.
Nesta gestures to the apartment. “Do you want to come back inside, then? I’m sure he has clothes on by now.”
Gwyn clears her throat uncomfortably and looks down. “I’d rather not. I’m—I don’t like being around men.”
Nesta pauses, not sure if she heard right. “Like, in a ‘check the backseat of your car before getting in’ way, or…?”
“No, like I can’t be alone in a room with a man without feeling sick. It activates my fight or flight, it’s weird.” She’s carefully stiff, like she’s ready to be met with humiliation.
Nesta remembers that Gwyn has never told her about her therapy sessions before, but she knows they’re more intensive than her own weekly conversations with Lana.
“Not that I think your boyfriend is a bad person,” Gwyn adds when Nesta doesn’t respond. “He looks really nice. He sounds nice, too.”
But Nesta doesn’t care about any of that. Unsure of what to do next, she reaches out and awkwardly pats Gwyn on the arm. “Good thing you’ve never been to the cabin, then. Cassian’s brother is staying…” She trails off when she realizes none of this is relevant. “Why are you here so early?” she asks instead.
Gwyn eases up a little at the change in subject. “I missed you. We’ve barely talked since Christmas.”
Nesta didn’t realize people would take such notice to her absence. “Yeah.” She flushes. “I do that sometimes. I’ll send a message next time I go into hibernation, though.”
“You’re freezing,” Gwyn suddenly scolds, noticing how Nesta’s goosebumped arms are wrapped tightly around herself. She unzips her red hoodie and shrugs it off. “Go back inside and get dressed.” She flings the hoodie around Nesta’s shoulders before Nesta can protest. “Meet me at my car. We’re hanging out.”
Nesta knows that a last minute change of events is not the end of the world, even if it sometimes feels like it. For Gwyn and Emerie, she can bear the discomfort of unexpected plans, same as she does for Cassian. But she at least has to know: “How long will we be out?”
“You can come home after lunch.” At Nesta’s face, Gwyn adds, “Lunch will be at two and shouldn’t take more than an hour.”
Looking her friend up and down, someone who has such an easy time understanding her, Nesta nods in satisfaction. She turns around to go back inside.
***
They end up at the library where Gwyn works, in the stacks of the long-abandoned encyclopedia section.
Emerie takes a loud sip from the huge McDonald’s soda she snuck in. “So all this show was because Gwyn didn’t want to work her shift alone?”
“I just have some last minute cleanup to do,” she hisses for the third time, shoving an old book back where it belongs. “Go to the porn section if you’re so bored here.”
“Oh, I definitely will,” Emerie says. “But I’m glad that we’re congregating now, even if it’s in the most depressing part of the library. I have a present for you girls.” She hands Nesta her drink so she can dig around in her purse.
Nesta personally has no complaints. The library is quiet, it smells of paper and old ink, and it holds all her favorite books. It’s almost better than staying in.
Emerie successfully pulls out a handful of folded and wrinkled papers from her bag, smoothing them out as best she can. “One for each of us,” she says, passing the papers around.
Nesta takes her paper and stares at the header. Gwyn is the first to speak. “Pole dancing classes?”
“Why?” Nesta says.
“Well, I originally offered them to Justinian and Isaac but they said no—”
“It’s really not for me,” Gwyn interrupts, trying to pass the registration form back to Emerie. “Sorry.”
Nesta doesn’t give her form back.
“Look,” Emerie says. “I get the hesitation. We’re a handful of boring bitches who hate having fun. But don’t you think that has to change at some point?”
“I’ve known you guys a month,” Gwyn retorts. “We’ve only been boring bitches for a month. This is too much.” She turns to Nesta for help.
Nesta is still staring at the paper. Dancing—on a pole, yes, but it’s still dancing. “I’ll do it,” she says.
Gwyn looks betrayed and Emerie looks elated. “Really?” She hops up and down. “That’s two against one, Gwyn. You have to do it, too.”
Gwyn’s cheeks are turning red in frustration. “You can’t just force this on me—”
“Gwyneth,” a sharp voice interrupts their conversation. Nesta spins around to find a young woman with dark skin and bleached white curls heading in their direction, a stack of books in her arms.
She halts before Nesta and glares. “No food or drink in the library.” She looks pointedly at the 32-ounce in her hand.
“It’s not mine.” Nesta shoves the drink back to Emerie.
But the librarian has turned to Gwyn, who hides the dance class form behind her back. “And what are you doing here?” she demands.
“Just putting up a few books, Merrill,” Gwyn answers quickly.
“While socializing?” the woman named Merrill sneers.
“We were just asking for help finding the romance section. Is that a problem?” Emerie crosses her arms and steps forward, letting a little of her beautiful deadliness slip into her stance. It’s the deadliness of someone at the top of her law class, someone who will graduate in a few months with all the power she could want in the palm of her hand. Nesta gets a rush from playing the lawyer game, too, but she’s never had the kind of ambition that Emerie has. Emerie is a shark sitting around in a small pond.
Merrill is not impressed. She snatches the styrofoam cup dangling from Emerie’s hand and tosses it in the nearby trash can. She turns back to Gwyn. “Hand your badge over and clock out.”
“But I’m not done yet—”
“Now.”
“Okay,” she squeaks. She pulls her ID badge off her neck and hands it to Merrill.
Nesta gapes in disbelief. Before she can speak up, Merrill says, “No loitering in the library. If you don’t have anything you need to check out, leave.” With one final judgmental look, she turns down an aisle of dusty books and disappears.
Gwyn makes a face at her back.
“That woman is not old enough to be acting that misanthropic,” Emerie says after Merrill is gone.
“Whatever,” Gwyn mutters. The registration form is still in her hand. She crumples it into a ball and throws it into the trash. “Let’s get out of here.”
Nesta stares at the trash as Gwyn turns to leave. “Coward,” she says.
Gwyn’s head snaps toward Nesta, her auburn hair swinging. “Excuse me?”
She shrugs. “You heard me.” Emerie’s eyes bounce back and forth between the girls.
“I did,” Gwyn says. “I was just making sure this wasn’t coming from the woman who would sooner bite someone’s head off than do something she doesn’t want to.”
“Girls,” Emerie snaps before Nesta can bite back. “It’s just a stupid dance class. I thought it would be fun to do together, but it doesn’t matter anymore.” Taking Gwyn by one arm and Nesta by the other, she starts steering them out of the stacks like a stern mother. “Now let’s go eat. I’m fucking hungry.”
Gwyn’s mood from the library doesn’t recover, even as they sit down for lunch at the local diner. Nesta thinks Gwyn might actually be sick when the male waiter winks at her while taking her order, and it’s not until long after he’s gone that color returns to her face. When their food arrives, Gwyn only picks at her plate.
“What’s wrong?” Nesta finally has to ask bluntly. “You look pukey.” Did the coward comment affect Gwyn more than she let on, or was it Merrill’s attitude that threw her off?
At Nesta’s words, Gwyn becomes even more pallid. “I just don’t feel great today,” she murmurs, looking around like she’s seeking a way out of the diner. “Sorry guys, I didn’t mean to be such a buzzkill. Maybe I should go home early.”
“Absolutely not,” Emerie says. “If you’re going home, we’re going home with you.”
Gwyn bites her lip, trying to decide if she wants that or not. But something about her antsy demeanor is too familiar to Nesta, because she says, “If you really want to be alone, do you mind driving me home first? Emerie’s car is a mess.”
“You just need to move around a few papers,” Emerie protests.
But Gwyn nods distractedly, already gathering her things. “Sure, no problem.” They pay the bill and go their separate ways.
During the ride home, the sky that’s been gray all day finally breaks open, unleashing a spattering of rain over the town. Nesta watches it sprinkle while Gwyn drives in silence.
“Why are you scared of Merrill?” she eventually asks. “She doesn’t look much older than you.”
Gwyn snorts, but there isn’t much heart to it. “Merrill is my superior, but I can handle her on most days.”
“Just not today?”
Gwyn eyes Nesta warily from the corner of her eye. “No, not today. Or this week.”
Nesta chooses not to push. The dull metal of the cars surrounding them glints under the rain, and they arrive at a red light.
After a minute, she takes a breath and blurts, “I’m not always like that around guys, you know.”
Nesta watches her closely, remembering how ghostly she seemed around Cassian, then the waiter. “Keep going.”
Gwyn stares straight at the traffic ahead, her fingers turning bone white on the steering wheel. “I’m just going through a hard period. Everything upsets me and I don’t know how to think straight. It’s like my brain accidentally traveled to the past and now it’s stuck there.” She sounds shaky, breathless, and it makes Nesta wonder what exactly her mind is experiencing.
Nesta knows what it’s like to be unable to move on. Her own brain has only recently started looking toward the future. “Where are you stuck, specifically?” she asks hesitantly. Maybe she can help Gwyn navigate her way out.
Gwyn’s chin quivers. “In a dark room.” Her lips form a tight line. “Being held down. I’m outnumbered.”
Nesta’s stomach turns. “How far back is it?”
“Two years,” Gwyn whispers. “Lately I can’t even look at anything without—remembering it. Thinking about it. Every time I feel like I’m moving past it, I end up being wrong.”
The light turns green, and Nesta puts a hand on Gwyn’s knee in an attempt to ground her. “Drive,” she commands softly.
Gwyn presses down on the accelerator, but Nesta can feel her leg trembling beneath her hand. She squeezes her knee hard. Even with the dark parts of her own past, Nesta has never felt what Gwyn is feeling right now. So she tries to stick to what she knows.
“It’s like you said,” she says carefully. “You’re going through a period where your brain isn’t being friendly to you. It’s horrible, but you can live with the knowledge that it’ll be over eventually.”
Gwyn shakes her head, holding back tears. “It doesn’t work like that. Once it goes away, it’ll just come back again. And it’ll be like that for the rest of my life.”
“You’re right.” Nesta doesn’t have a solution for that, and she hates it. “You’ll never forget. You can be at the peak of your life and still remember all of it. But,” she says slowly, “whether you reach a point where it barely fazes you, or if you keep crippling under the weight of it decades later, you’ll still be normal. You’ll be a perfectly normal human.”
Gwyn lets out a tearful laugh at that. “What does that even mean?”
Shit. “It means…” Nesta tries to explain herself better. “In case you’re worried that there’s something very wrong with you, I’m here telling you that there’s not. There will never be anything wrong with you.”
Gwyn eyes her skeptically as they turn onto a residential road. “Even if I never get past one nightmare I lived years ago? Even if that nightmare defines me until the day I die?”
“That won’t happen.” Nesta’s tone is simple, factual. “But yes, even then.”
“Really? You’re not gonna tell me to live for the better days or whatever?”
“Does that sound like something that would help you? Because I can say it if it does.”
Gwyn snorts. “No.” But her limbs are steady and her eyes are clear on the road. She clears her throat. “Thank you for listening. I think I might feel a little better now.”
“Was it because of what I said?” Nesta tries not to be too hopeful.
“I wouldn’t give you that much credit,” Gwyn says, crushing her hope. “But I’m glad I told you. It makes things…a lot easier for me.” She exhales deeply.
“You know my plate is mostly empty these days.” Nesta pats her knee. “That means I’ll always have room to help carry your shit.”
They pull up to Nesta’s apartment, and Gwyn parks at the curb. “Give me your dance class thing,” she says suddenly.
Frowning, Nesta pulls the wrinkled paper out of her purse and hands it to Gwyn.
Gwyn smooths it out on the steering wheel and grabs a pen from a cupholder, clicking it. “If you’re going to help carry my shit, I guess I have time for pole dancing now.”
“But that’s mine,” Nesta protests as Gwyn starts filling out the form.
“It can be both of ours,” she says, writing Nesta’s name under hers.
“Really?” Nesta grins with an excitement that she doesn’t easily feel. “You’re going to do it with us?”
“Why would I let you do it without me? So I can become the third wheel in our girl group?” She gives Nesta a look that says No way in hell.
Nesta rolls her eyes. “That would never happen to you.”
“Sure,” Gwyn drawls. She finishes the form and folds it in half before pocketing it. “I’ll give this to Emerie as a gift.” She leans over to peck Nesta on the cheek. “Now get home. Love you.”
Nesta turns red at the words and coughs. “Thanks for the ride,” she responds, getting out of the car.
“Say it back!” Gwyn calls after her. But Nesta shuts the door in her face and waves, pretending she can’t hear her. Gwyn mock-scowls at her through the window, but lets her off easy and drives away.
That’s enough feelings for today, Nesta decides. Even if her chest is swelling with emotion for her friend. It’s a sweet hurt that lingers long after she returns to her empty apartment.
***
a/n: i’m back in my no plot, just vibes era
taglist: @hellasblessed @sjm-things @thewayshedreamed @drielecarla @valkyriewarriors @superspiritfestival @aliveahaahahafuck @cupcakey00 @sayosdreams @rainbowcheetah512 @claralady @thebluemartini @nessiantho @missing-merlin @duskandstarlight @lucy617 @sleeping-and-books @everything-that-i-love @cassianscool @swankii-art-teacher @awesomelena555 @julemmaes @wickedqueenoffantasy @poisonous-bloom @observationanxioustheorist @gisellefigue08 @courtofjurdan @theoverlyenthusiasticwriter @wolfiixxx @cass-nes @seashade @royaltykxx @illyrianundercover @queenestarcheron @monstrousloves-explodinggalaxies @humanexile @that-golden-lyre @agentsofsheilds @mercy-is-alive @cassiansbigwingspan @laylaameer01 @verypaleninja @maastrash @bow-dawn @perseusannabeth @dead-on-the-inside666 @jlinez @hungryreadingaddict @anidealiveson @planet-faerie @shallowhighwaters @ghostlyrose2 @chosenfamily-valkyriequeens @rarephloxes
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liyuesbian · 3 years ago
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✧ 101 dalmatians!au [ayaka]
notes: ........this is actually an updated (not rly) version of my 101 dalmatians!au with seulgi on my kpop gg writing blog..... sorryyyy i'm not being lazy i promise!! i've just got back from holiday and am working on a ningguang x reader but it might take a while (i rly wanna perfect it) so this is a placeholder for now :p
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you would occasionally spot kamisato ayaka in the park walking her dalmatian. she's well-known around the local area because of her older brother: the mayor of the city. in fact, you also have a dog of the same breed, which is what drew you to her in the first place��minus her eye-catchingly extravagant outfits and cute facial features.
your own dalmatian is wonderful. when you were ten years old, your christmas wish was to get a puppy. much to your younger self’s disappointment, santa claus had gifted you with a rather large—and older—"puppy" than you had imagined in your head. nevertheless, you treated the newly named pongo with as much love as you could give him.
fast forward about ten years later and here is the same pongo eagerly trying to gain your attention as you sit in front of your piano. you’re thinking of how best to go about composing the last few bars of a song you’re working on.
unbeknownst to you, the dalmatian had sneakily altered the time of the clock and is now motioning to the door, howling. you double-check the time on your wristwatch but despite the inconsistency, you decide to go for the daily walk and attach a leash to his collar. it seems like you have no other choice: pongo has your hat between his teeth and is scratching at the door handle. you laugh as you give in to your dog’s contagious enthusiasm, taking your fedora from his mouth.
with the leash in one hand and a ball in the other, you are manhandled—or should i say doghandled—as pongo drags you all the way to the park. he appears to be looking for something, but you dismiss it. you attempt to undo the clasp of the leash, failing when pongo suddenly dashes off.
“slow down, pongo!” you yelp. this kind of high-energy behaviour isn’t new to you but it certainly catches you off-guard. in the end, you let your dog indulge himself in his antics and you’re led to the edge of the lake where you take a seat and gasp for breath. goodness, you don’t think you’ve ever done so much running in your life.
exhausted, you fan yourself with your fedora and loosen the top button on your dress shirt. the grass underneath you feels nice to rest on compared to the wooden chair you’d been sitting on for the whole morning.
it takes you a second to notice your companion gazing at a certain animal behind you. turning around, you recognise the dalmatian who’s seized pongo’s eyes from her pink collar and apprehensively look up to the owner. she’s perched on a bench next to the dog with her signature fan and a book in her hands. in shock, you jerk your head forward and blink a few times.
should we move somewhere else?
as if sensing your uneasiness, pongo barks and jumps to grab your hat. you sigh but grin at his mischievous face.
“come on, pongo. give it back.” taking her eyes off the pages of her book, ayaka glances at you and your dog, the ends of her mouth curving up ever so slightly to form a smile which stays hidden behind the upright fan. you throw the ball lightly in an attempt to get him to drop your hat.
it doesn't quite work and instead, rolls in the direction of the occupied bench. perdita, ayaka's dalmatian, glimpses at it, trying to withhold the urge to play with the bouncy toy. ayaka chuckles which causes you to cease your glaring at pongo to face her. the ringing of her laugh is pleasant and something you haven’t noticed before.
if only i could hear it every day. gently, you hit your cheeks to awaken yourself from your thoughts.
pongo is now frolicking in circles with the captured hat, vying for the attention of ayaka's dog. while you’re battling a two-way argument in your head and one with your dalmatian, you feel a soft nudge on your thigh. perdita has given you the ball back, and you could hear pongo whimpering sadly. impressed, you pet perdita who reacts with a delightful pant. the female dalmatian glances at pongo and apathetically walks back to her owner, who attaches a leash. they start to walk away.
pongo yaps in surprise. quickly, he abandons your hat and is about to take off when you tell him to stay, which he does obediently. you could tell your dog is planning to go after perdita, but you don’t want him running around aimlessly so you fasten his leash.
as soon as you do though, you’re being hauled once again towards kamisato ayaka. the hyperactive dalmatian follows the blue-haired woman and playfully circles her, earning a giggle from the subject of interest. unfortunately for the both of you, your legs have gotten tied to hers.
“oh my, i'm very sorry about this!” you blush. of course, you’ve never been in such close quarters with her before making it all the more embarrassing but you don’t entirely regret this moment either… until you realise that with the both of you frantically trying to get out of the awkward position and your dog pulling at the leash, the result would be all three of you tethering on the edge of the lake and perdita helplessly grabbing onto her owner to prevent the fall.
“oh no.” a splash is heard throughout the park.
clothes damp, you sit in the shallow water in cold shock, finding yourself no longer tangled around the dog leash. next to you, ayaka stands up to try searching for her hat and fan which pongo finds and gives to you with an almost apologetic expression.
“it seems i've lost my belongings,” she says worriedly.
“don’t worry, i have the things you're looking for right here.” you hand her her possessions and fix her hair but to no avail.
“ah, thank you.” you brush her wet bangs to the side so she could see.
“i'm truly very sorry! i don’t know how we ended up in the lake of all things.” you apologise profusely to the bewildered lady and attempt to make things better by removing the plants from her clothes. meanwhile, pongo has shaken himself dry and is relaxing next to perdita.
gosh, what kind of situation have i gotten myself into?
“no, it’s alright, i'll just dry myself off for now.” you see ayaka fetching a… soaked handkerchief from her purse.
“hold on, i usually carry one in my pocket.” however, yours too, is also drenched. “oh—"
ayaka begins to giggle. dumbfounded, you laugh with her. both of your dogs glance at each other and back at the pair of you, cocking their heads. you thought the pleasant sound and amicable smile were the only things about her laughter that could make your heart swell but now, with ayaka right in front of you, you notice things you would’ve never been able to before. you witness how her eyes crinkle and close shut and how her cheeks balloon revealing an even more charming side to her. you wonder what it would be like if you could make her this happy all the time.
after helping ayaka out of the pond, you feel it wouldn’t be right to leave her to go home all doused in water.
“would it be possible to invite you to our house? we live close by so it would be no trouble at all if you want to dry off there. it would probably be very uncomfortable to journey home in this state and i can't bear to watch you attempt to.” shyly, you meet her eyes after your impromptu offer to see ayaka grinning.
“i think i'd like to accept that offer. i suppose it is your fault too!” she quips and jokingly nudges your shoulder.
you smile back and turn to face your dalmatian who you will whisper many thank yous to later in life.
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luxekook · 5 years ago
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ego | jjk | harry potter au
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⇥ pairing: gryffindor jeongukk x hufflepuff reader
⇥ genre: harry potter AU, smut, fluff, angst
⇥ summary: in which jeongguk is a cocky lil shit and the reader has to take him down a few pegs 
⇥ warnings: 18+, dirty talk, light smut, cursing
© luxekook. please do not repost, modify, edit or translate.
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The wind whirled around me as I careened towards the glistening goal posts, imagining the opposing team’s Keeper darting back and forth in hopes of blocking the Quaffle that was currently tucked under my arm. I feigned left and the imaginary keeper followed suit. I threw right – Quaffle sailing through the rightmost gold hoop.
I smiled and dove down past the posts to catch up with my own throw. Even though it was still the first week of the new term, I was determined to prove my newly acquired captain-status. Hufflepuff hadn’t had a female captain in ages; and, paired with that, I was only a 6th year.
Luckily, I had a strong team behind me with mostly returning players who I knew would fiercely support me. Us Puffs stuck together. It was inherently in our blood to be loyal as hell to our own, and I thanked Merlin for that every day since receiving the captain’s badge.
As soon as I had hopped on the Hogwarts’ Express a few days prior, I had immediately been swept up in a giant bear hug by Jeong Yunho, one of the Hufflepuff beaters.
“Oh, captain! My captain!” he had dramatically cried, spinning me around. His Dead Poet’s Society reference was not lost on me since I had a muggle parent with excellent taste in movies. Similar reactions from the rest of the team followed suit over the course of the train ride and the Welcoming Feast.
Trials for our only open position of Seeker would take place this weekend with practices immediately starting Monday. We had high hopes for redemption this season after being crushed by Slytherin’s team of goons early on in the Cup tournament.
The Slytherin team’s head hooligan Kang Dokyun led his team with a nasty blend of intimidation and violent tactics. I was convinced that Slytherin didn’t even hold trials and that they just lined up the Slytherin boys, picking out the biggest of the lot. Basically, Slytherin was strong, but slow and slightly uncoordinated. We could beat them by exploiting their weaknesses – of that I was certain.
Ravenclaw would be a bit harder to conquer. Their team played with a level of elegance and intelligence that was so utterly Ravenclaw that even us Puffs got annoyed. Ravenclaw’s captain Yoon Jisoo constructed tactical plays so tricky that she was already recruited to play for Puddlemore next year. Their team was smart, but not completely unbeatable. The Ravenclaws sometimes got so ingrained in their methodical maneuvers that they failed to notice some of their opponents’ counterattacks. That was how they lost the Cup last term to Gryffindor.
Gryffindor was our toughest competition. Winning the Cup last term, the Gryffindor team was a nauseatingly perfect balance between brains and brawn. Their captain Jeon Jeongguk, now a 7th year, was renowned for his tyrannical practice regime that he put his team through. We’d only played Gryffindor once in the regular season last year, and we had held our own for a while until we started getting tired and they didn’t. Seems like Jeongguk knew his shit when it came to conditioning. Something that I was determined to emulate with my own team.
Jeongguk was also the best damn Keeper that Hogwarts had seen in a long time, a fact that didn’t go unnoticed by the looks of the professional Quidditch scouts that avidly attended his matches. He was way bigger than a typical Keeper – extremely tall with broad shoulders and giant paws for hands. However, the only thing bigger than his stature and talent was his fucking ego.
He carried himself like he was the king of the school, and, unfortunately, most people treated him like it. Girls especially flocked to him – mainly for two reasons: 1) Jeongguk was undoubtedly hot, and 2) he held the promise of a rich future. Personally, I cared for neither of those traits considering his appalling personality and pride.
That damned ego would be his downfall this season. I would make sure of it, I thought as I circled around the stadium and then landed to get a drink.
I was definitely above average on the Quidditch talent scale. Holding the current school record for most assists in a season, I considered myself the glue of the Hufflepuff team – a fact that our Head of House obviously agreed with. However, no one really talked about the glue of a team, they talked about the flashy glitter and the gold stars. I was fine with that. Being the underdog was nothing new to a Hufflepuff, and I planned on using that to our advantage this season. Who said Puffs couldn’t be a little devious?
I smirked to myself as I grabbed my broom, ready to get back to practicing. This would be our fucking year.
“Hey,” a deceptively sweet voice rang out from above me, “You mind sharing the pitch? I need to practice.”
My mood soured. I knew who that was. Kicking off the ground, I flew to face him, “Sure thing, Jeon, just stay out of my way.”
It was almost as if I’d slapped him across the face, “Excuse me?” he choked out, “Do I know you?”
Unbelievable. Jeongguk’s head was evidently so far up his own ass he couldn’t recognize opponents he’d been playing for years. “I guess not,” I countered. And with a flick of my ponytail, I took off towards the opposite end of the pitch.
Unfortunately, he followed, “Are you a Gryffindor? If so, you should come to tryouts tomorrow. You’re pretty fast and we need a new Chaser.”
“Not a Gryffindor,” I called out, dipping low to the ground to scoop up my old practice Quaffle, “But I am a Chaser.”
Jeongguk was still tailing me, and I pulled to a stop to face him, “I thought you had to practice?”
He mirrored my position and crossed his arms. I tried (and failed) to stop myself from noticing how his biceps flexed and how a hint of his famed phoenix tattoo curled up his neck. Merlin, even I couldn’t deny he was hot as fuck. The recent summer months seemed to have blessed his skin with a glowing tan that accentuated the warmth of his dark eyes. It also seemed like he forgot what a haircut was as I watched the wind tousle his slightly curling hair.
“I do,” his eyes were narrowed as he cleared his throat, “I just have to make sure you’re not spying for another team.”
All thoughts of him being fine flew out the Owlery as I scowled. I refused to be intimidated by some arrogant asshole, “Did you not hear me when I said to stay on the opposite end of the pitch, Jeon? What kind of self-respecting spy would ask that?”
“You’re a Slytherin,” Jeongguk declared, his tone too sure for my liking.
He was really aggravating me now, and it took a lot for a Puff to get pissed off, “So, just because I have a semblance of a backbone, I’m a Slytherin? You need to brush up on your House knowledge.”
He was quiet, his expression contemplative, his jaw clenched. His eyes were scanning me with an intensity I was not sure I liked. And then he did something I liked even less: “I propose a game,” his mouth twisted upwards in a smirk, “You say you’re a Chaser?”
I gave a slight tilt of my chin in affirmation. He resumed, “Well, then you must know I’m a Keeper.” He paused, grinning wickedly, waiting for me to react to the double entendre. Eyebrows raised at my pointed silence, he continued, “And we both need to practice… So how ‘bout you try to score on me and for every shot I block you have to answer one of my questions.”
This motherfucker right here. I summoned my inner Helga to give me the strength to deal with this Gryffindor prick, “Say I was to agree to this, what would I get if I score on you?”
The laugh I got in response made all thoughts of remaining a kind and patient Puff evaporate faster than a weak Patronus.
He was still laughing when he noticed I looked ready to Avada him wandless, “Okay, okay. What do you want if you score?” He barely got the words out in between chuckles.
“To come to a Gryffindor practice.”
That shut him up real fast, “No fucking way. I don’t need you distracting my players.”
My nose crinkled, “Distracting? I would just be sitting in the stands, you prick.”
His jaw ticked as he rolled his eyes, “You could be on the furthest corner of the pitch and you’d still distract them, jagi.”
“Don’t call me that. And, pray tell, why I would distract them?” Our brooms were now practically touching as we had instinctively moved closer to one another. I could see the sweat glistening on his brow and the shadow of stubble on his jaw. Merlin, he was potent.
“Because,” Jeongguk paused, acting like this was the most obvious answer in the world, “You’re hot.”
I blinked. And blinked again, “Are you serious?” He opened his mouth to respond. “Nope, don’t answer that, Jeon,” I brushed right over his attempt to answer my rhetorical question, “So, do we have a deal or not? If you’re the esteemed Keeper that you clearly think you are, it shouldn’t be a problem for you to block all my shots, should it?”
My words echoed around us. He looked conflicted, but I knew his ego would not let my challenge go, “Deal. Five shots from the penalty mark.”
He flew towards the goal posts, “Looking forward to getting my questions answered, love,” he bellowed back at me.
I mentally flipped him off as I took off after him, clutching my Quaffle.
Sending out a plea to Merlin, Helga and everyone in between, I pulled to a stop at the penalty mark and pondered how I wanted to play this. He obviously thought he would save all five attempts. I spared him a glance and glower as I notice he was slouching on his broom with a lazy smirk, clearly not taking me as a serious threat.
Fine, I would just have to hustle him. He was asking for it at this point.
I got into formation. As much as it would pain me to mess up this shot on purpose, I knew that I had to in order to make my plan work.
Taking off towards the posts, my movement caused Jeongguk to finally move into a somewhat defensive position. I feigned right, doing so in a way too obvious manner. Hurling the Quaffle towards the top hoop, I watched expectantly as he deflected it with just a slight flick of his hand.
“Come on,” Jeongguk laughed, “You can do better than that, jagi.” He flew over to me and when I stretched to take back the Quaffle he now held in his hand, he shifted it out of reach, “Uh-uh, nope. It’s question time. What’s your name?”
How predictable. “It’s (y/n). Now give me the Quaffle.”
“Last name?” Jeongguk kept the Quaffle out of my hands.
“That’s a separate question, Jeon. You never specified that I give you my full name.” It was my turn to smirk as he threw the Quaffle back at me and headed back to the posts mumbling about loopholes and how I must’ve been a Ravenclaw.
I lined back up for the second shot. I had to make this one a little bit better than the last to show that I was trying, but not too much better that he’d be prepared for my final shots.
I ducked down, twisting around to head towards the right post with my full focus on the hoop. I launched the Quaffle. Jeongguk swooped up to catch it in a way that was entirely too elaborate for such a lame throw. He was clearly showing off – an action that I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the meaning behind.
Jeongguk made his way over to me, grinning, “Second question, jagi. Full name, please.”
“(y/f/n) (y/l/n),” I muttered, eyes scanning his face for signs of recognition and hands grabbing the Quaffle away from him.
He looked puzzled, “(y/l/n)? Why does that sound so familiar?”
Before he could think on it further, I pushed his shoulder, “Back to the posts. You got your answer.”
Well, I had attempted to push his shoulder. He didn’t even flinch at my shove. His eyes darted to where my hand now laid on his chest. I removed it faster than a Wronski Feint, trying to ignore the tingles that shot up my arm.
Our eyes connected and his were blazing as his mouth crept into a slow smile, “Like your hands on me.” Before I could formulate a reply, he flew off and I resolved that I would make this next shot as if my life depended on it.
We faced each other. I shifted the Quaffle from hand to hand and took off towards him. I gave him no tells, no feints, nothing. This seemed to throw him off for a split second, but that second was all I needed to send the Quaffle sailing through the bottom hoop.
“What the fuck was that?” Jeongguk yelled as he got all up in my face.
I bit back a smile. “Beginner’s luck?” I quipped, loving how his face had darkened perceptibly, “Don’t worry. I’m sure I can pick up some more tips at your practice.”
Unable to keep my grin in check any longer, I smile widely as he lets out a stream of curses that would make even my old crotchety aunt blush.
We resumed our positions. This time he seemed more alert and watchful. He was getting wary of me, despite my claim that it was just luck. Maybe he knew better after all…
“That won’t happen again, (y/n). Don’t get used to it!” he shouted from the posts.
…Or not.
I took off. Luck be damned. I zigzagged back and forth towards him. Throwing the Quaffle up in the air, I quickly rolled off my broom, sharply grabbing its end and swinging it up to hit the Quaffle mid-air through the center goalpost. A perfectly executed Finbourgh Flick. Regaining my seat on my broom I sailed back to the penalty line and turned back to face Jeongguk.
He looked utterly gobsmacked, “Beginner’s luck? Beginner’s fucking luck? Who the fuck are you?”
I grinned victoriously at his wounded ego, “You know my name, Jeon. Now you can use it at two practices.”
“(y/f/n) (y/l/n), (y/f/n) (y/l/n)… fucking hell,  you’re the new Hufflepuff captain,” he gawked at me.
“Bingo, Gryff,” I laughed, “Took you long enough.”
“Why did I think you were a bloke? I would have remembered such a—” he cut himself off, “You hustled me! There is no way I’m letting you into my practices now.”
We were nose to nose now as I responded, “A deal’s a deal. I thought you Gryffindors were all about honor.”
His face was thunderous, “And I thought you Hufflepuffs were all about fairness.”
“We are,” I said plainly, “We just don’t take lightly to intimidation. Now come on, we’ve got one round left.”
A range of emotions moved across his face to settle in a heated look that I couldn’t quite decipher, “Fine, jagi,” his molten gaze darted to my mouth, “Give it your best shot.”
Swallowing hard, I shook my head, trying to clear my brain of entirely too inappropriate thoughts of me and Jeongguk. As much as I attempted to refocus on making my final shot, my attention wasn’t fully there.
And I fucked it up. Jeongguk dove to catch my throw mid-air, and he sped towards me triumphantly, “Slipping already? What was that?”
I blushed. He noticed.
“Come on,” he said, “I need a drink and then you need to answer my last question.”
I followed him to the ground, cursing my treacherous body for reacting so obviously. My subconscious battled:
‘He’s a player!’ the imaginary Dumbledore on my right shoulder boomed.
‘Kiss him. Now!’ hissed the fictitious Voldemort from the other side.
However, all thoughts evacuated my brain at the sight of Jeongguk peeling off his shirt and taking a long sip from his water bottle. My traitorous eyes flew over his torso. I took in his defined abs, his chiseled arms and his fucking beautiful phoenix tattoo that spanned the entirety of his left shoulder, left upper back, and a portion of his neck.
Then I noticed his eyes were watching me right back. And they were all to amused to be innocent… “Are you seducing me?”
He spit out his mouthful of water, laughing, “Why? Is this working for you?”
My eyes now resembled slits as I glared at him, “Is that your last question?”
“No!” His response came so fast I jolted back on impulse, “No, it’s not…”
He trailed off as he prowled towards me. I stepped back. He kept coming. I stepped back further.
“Why are you running, jagi?” his words were too soft and too intense for my liking. I took another step back and bumped up against the stands. His grin in response was predatory as he caged me in between the stands and his body, his arms on either side of my head.
“Nowhere to run now, little Hufflepuff…” he dragged a finger along the hollows of my throat. He definitely felt the rapid pounding of my pulse, his eyes darkening to the point that they almost seemed black.
I glared defiantly at him, refusing to be daunted by his size or his words. He smirked, “Your last question: do you want to kiss me as much as I want to kiss you?”
I stopped breathing. He waited, a look of uncertainty flickered on his face so briefly I almost thought I’d imagined it.
That little flare of vulnerability – that should not have been as appealing to me as it was – helped me to regain some of my bearings, “And how much do you want to kiss me? I need a scale of reference.”
He smiled crookedly as he leaned in even further, lips brushing against me as he whispered into my neck, “So fucking bad.”
His tongue darted across my skin as he dragged it up towards my ear. Biting it softly, he murmured, “Well?”
Fuck it all.
My hands latched onto his shoulders and his head snapped up. Raising to my tiptoes, I kissed him. He let out a rough groan, sounding like I was killing him. His hands slid down my body to squeeze my ass before hoisting me up. My legs circled his lean hips as his teeth caught my bottom lip in a faint bite. My hands tangled in his hair, pulling slightly. His hips pressed into mine, drawing a moan from my lips. He smiled against my mouth.
I nipped his lip now in retribution, but it seemed to only urge him on. One hand came up to remove my hair-tie, flinging it over his shoulder. I made a noise of protest, but he just kissed me harder.
How the fuck was he holding me up with one hand?
I prided myself on being a pretty thick bitch, and he was over here acting like I weighed nothing. My fingernails slid down his back, raking over the hard muscles and feeling how they flexed and shifted under my touch.
I don’t know how long we spent making out against the stands, but soon enough we heard voices coming from around the corner. Ripping my mouth away from his, I jumped out of his embrace, landing on shaky legs.
His arm wrapped around my waist as he steadies me. He was breathing just as hard as me and I could feel his heartbeat racing. I tugged away from him to retrieve my hair-tie from the ground and put my now wild hair back into its ponytail.
I could feel Jeongguk’s eyes on me all the while. I looked at him. His lips were swollen, his hair was a disheveled mess, his neck was displaying a rather nice hickey that I was sure was mirrored several times over on my own neck. A rare feeling of pride shot through me, and as he opened his mouth to say something, I shook my head and placed a finger over his lips.
“I’ll see you at your practice, Jeon.” I placed a quick kiss on his cheek, grabbed my broom and walked off.
As I strode away, I heard him grumbling under his breath: “Everybody warns you about the Slytherins. Nobody fucking warns you about the Hufflepuffs. Fucking hell…”
I smiled all the way back to the Common Room.
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aio-rya · 4 years ago
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"Give me a sign" — Leona x reader
One shot requested by: Anon
『Btw anon, I'm sorry I didn't have the Anon mode on until like two days ago.』
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Days kept going on as [y/n] started being fond of everyone they met at NRC, specially the Braincell Squad along Epel, Jack and yeah, Sebek, who sometimes joined them too. Most of the time, when they were not causing trouble at their dorms, they gathered at Ramshackle for "studying". Though there was one day a week [y/n] used to sneak out, following Epel around to his Magift practice.
The last time they saw a game was when they were hit conveniently by the disc thanks to Grimm's movements, but [y/n] was not really interested on the game, oh no —those getaways were to see someone. Indeed, the same person why they lurked around Savanaclaw with Jack by the end of the day. And everything was fine until...
"What the hell are you doing here, herbivore?" the lion man asked behind them. [Y/n] froze right there, crouched behind one of the seats of the bleachers.
Did I forget telling that [Y/n] felt Leona doesn't like them? Well, now you know.
"I... Epel" they answered nervously and without context, putting a strand of their [h/c] hair behind their ear. "He forgot his water bottle and..."
"Tsk. Whatever you are doing here, do it fast and go away" he interrupted, rolling his eyes and passing by them as if that never happened.
And this was the day to day of [y/n] and Leona whenever they got to see each other. The matter was that he, Leona Kingscholar himself, felt sort of intimidated by the little human —why? He didn't know. It was sort of an allergic reaction or something, he felt his heart beat harder, his cheeks burning hot like feber, sort of a knot on his stomach and words flew away from his head.
"Hey, Kingscholar! I... Brought you these" [y/n] said as they extended him two special meat sandwiches from the cafeteria.
Leona turned around on his napping spot, looking at the human, then at the food and then, he turned around again, giving his back to the little one, who still held the sandwiches towards him.
"I Don't need them..." the lion said, and dismissed them with a movement of his hand, "Ruggie has already brought me something".
"I... I See" the human said, withdrawing his hand. "Then... You're gone. Again" they sighed while realising Leona's breath got a slower pace, he was asleep. There was nothing to do but leave; said and done.
Lucky was the big cat that they've already left when his ears twitched on signal that he was not sleeping, his eyes slightly opened, listening to the human voice with a trace of worry left behind. "It couldn't be sadness, or is it?" he told himself, turning to face the glass ceiling of the Botanical Garden with his hands behind his head.
"You really dismissed [y/n]'s food? They even fought with me for that since there were only three of those things left, ya'now?" Ruggie's voice snapped him out of his trance as the hyena threw a packed meat sandwich over his stomach. Then he heard a wrapper being opened as he sat down, looking at his friend at the moment he bite a sandwich —exactly the same like the one he threw at him a few seconds ago.
Ruggie realized about that and stopped, "What?" he asked towards Leona, still munching a piece of sandwich, when the lazy lion lifted a finger pointing directly to the food. "I'm not giving it to you" he stated in a possesive tone, holdingh tighter his food.
"It's not that” the dorm leader growled, “But... You said there were only three left..." Leona mumbled, unwrapping his food and starting to bite it too.
"Oh yeah, [y/n] gave it to me when I passed them back on the front gate of the Garden. They only needed one for his raccoon friend, even though, they got the other one for you” he continued munching while explaining the ruckus they caused on the cafeteria for those limited dishes. "Hey Leona!" Ruggie snapped his fingers in front of him "Are you okay? It's not like you to space out that obviously."
"I think I'm sick" he reflected out loud while making a pitch of his empty wrapper to the rubbish.
"I think you're lazy~ shishishishi"
"Don't go too smart" Leona shot him a wry look and sighed. "I think I'm allergic to that herbivore or something like that."
"What? C'mon, you're not serious" Ruggie sneered. Leona grunted, "Okay then, why do you think that?"
"Because..." He turned away, aware of his blush. "When [y/Ln] is near, my chest aches and I feel as I wanted to cough; also my stomach feels strange, as if I were hungry but also anxious? And there is this thing on my face... I run a fever every time that herbivore is near...."
"Buuuut~"
"But I like its smell. Or its presence" he finished with nothing more than a whisper.
"I see!" the hyena almost shouted, starting the lion, "You love them."
"Another joke like that and you're gone" he stared at Bucchi, angry but ashamed.
"Oh man... I'm just being honest" the blonde shrugged starting to walk away, "do as you wish but be careful. I don't how for how long [y/n] is going to bear you."
"Maybe he was tired", Deuce tried, quietly.
"Told you", Ace seconded him. "He's just like that, you cannot change him and... Have you thought that maybe he just doesn't like you? I mean like... Around him as he do with anyone else?"
"He was nice once" [y/n] tried to bring as an excuse, "After the Blot thing, he was someway nice. But... I did something wrong?"
Jack shook his head, "You should forget him. He's not the one, and I'm sorry about this but Ace is right..."
"Can I record that?" Trappola laughed, trying to open the camera of his phone.
"Shut up" Howl snapped, joining the laugh while hugging the little non-magic human between them.
"I think I can handle it. I mean... Nothing lasts forever and this little scratches heal with time" they tried to smile, eyes teary.
"Hey, we're here!" Epel cheered, "if you need to cry, to talk or you just want to mess around a little, call us!"
"That's why I call you my friends" and finally, the genuine smile appeared, "I'll sleep on it, I swear".
And both of them did: Kingscholar and [y/Ln]. Unfortunately, they reached two very opposite conclusions.
The little herbivore began to let go of their feelings, now they were no longer around Savanaclaw or the Magift training or even on the third years classrooms, they were free. Of course it still hurted whenever someone mentioned Leona, or at the Dorm Leader meetings or even when he was lurking around the cafeteria. Specially the last one was odd of the lion, and everyone around him noticed —even Vil started asking around what in hell happened to him.
"Ah, Ruggie-san" he said with velvety voice.
"Prefect Schoenheit" blonde hyena answered.
"Is Leona okay? He has been... Nicer than usual"
"Ah, you too. In fact, he's not really fine. His heart is about to break" Ruggie said, a bit worried as Vil gasped, not as an act but in genuine surprise, "his herbivore grew tired of him..."
Well, you see... Since [y/n] started getting rid of their unrequited love, Leona accepted it. And now it hurted so bad every time he got to see his herbivore: there was no "H-hey Leona..." or "Hello Kingscholar!" or any kind of cheerful greetings, everything tuned into a cold "Good morning/afternoon, Prefect Kingscholar", "Excuse me, Prefect Kingscholar" —they even stopped bumping into him, no more visits to his napping spot at the Botanical Garden and even when they got to Magift practice, Epel will always arrive alone. The knot in his stomach and the fever on his cheeks turned into a harsh pain on his throat and a burning heat on his eyes.
Meanwhile, Braincell Squad and first years club was proud, their little human finally was free and not depressed by the mistreatment of the Prince.
A couple of months passed until one evening, after clases, [y/n] made their way back to Ramshackle when heard someone sobbing, that scared them since Epel was having a hard time. By following the noise, they bumped into Leona and immediately tried to avoid him, but the lazy lion was not that slow; he walked quickly and grabbed their shoulders.
"Please, stop avoiding me" he said, not bothering on hiding the trembling of his voice.
"I... I am not" they said slowly, "Pref--"
"Don't" he grunted painfully, "Come back to call me Leona with that lively loud voice. Wake me up from my naps again, stare at me in the hallway so I can stare at you when you look away..." He sobbed again, weakening his grip, about to let his arms fall, "I... I am sorry."
"Why... Why are you apologising?" they asked, turning around to face him.
"Because I treated you so bad, and I... Thought I had an allergic reaction... To you" Leona whispered, [y/n] giggled.
"As far as I know, you cannot be allergic to a human" then they caressed one of Leona's braids, he stared at their [e/c] eyes, a pale gleam reflected on them. "It's fine, don't worry. We can still be friends".
He shook his head and caught them between his arms.
"I have denied it for too long. You deserve more, I was so mean, but I don't want to be just a friend" he explained tenderly, burying his nose on their hair, aspiring its sweet perfume.
"Leona, I'm not sure--"
"Just give me a sign..."
Silence. They just stayed like that, holding each other, [y/n] biting his bottom lip as Leona rubbed their back. When he finally was ready, understanding the situation and letting go of them, he got interrupted by a hold on his collar.
Then, a soft, sweet and warm pair of lips slammed against his.
It was a kiss full of fear and sadness that slowly turned into a gentle one. Full of untold feelings that tangled and finally were silently confessed.
"Is this enough?" the human asked, caressing his lover's cheek.
"It is more than enough... My loved herbivore".
—・ Φ・—
I melted with Leona's soft side, I don't know where I got the inspiration but I felt this took too long. Hope you like it too!
«Please do not repost or translate without permission»
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fruitcoops · 4 years ago
Note
Hey!! So if u want to, could u write a short fic or smth for number 25, because I am LIVING for a scenario where sirius just playfully bites remus and then he gets like super horny or the other way around.
The biting isn’t the central part of this fic, but all three parts of this series involve a solid amount of playful spicy bites. Here’s the third and final part of the night of Remus’ first goal! This has been a wild ride and honestly gave me great practice for smut writing, so thanks to everyone who supported the miniseries!
Coops credit goes to @lumosinlove
TW for restraint (holding, mentioned once), a teeny-tiny moment of injury angst, and sickening domesticity. Oh, and the smut of course.
Whoever figures out the song this series was inspired by first gets a shoutout in my next fic! Hint: look at the titles...
They wasted no time in getting up to the bedroom again. Sirius tripped over his own shirt in the rush and grabbed it off the stair as Remus laughed his ass off a few steps ahead, despite the fact that his own long sleeve was still abandoned by the front door.
Their sheets were a mess from the night’s previous activities, but Sirius was too busy falling even more deeply in love to really care as they laid down on their sides, tangling their legs together and smiling into each kiss. “Are you sure you’ve got one more in you?” he asked, half-teasing.
“Do you?” Remus hooked his ankle around Sirius’ calf and rolled on top of him, cradling his face in his hands as Sirius lovingly felt along every bump of his spine. He was still a little foggy from the mind-melting blowjob, to be honest—nonetheless, he felt a familiar pool of heat gathering low in his abdomen as Remus shifted.
“I’ll take that as a yes,” Sirius murmured, slipping his fingers through soft caramel waves. “What do you want?”
“You.”
“You have me.”
“I want you,” Remus said again with more emphasis as he skimmed his hands under Sirius’ waistband. “My second goal only happened because of your perfect assist.”
“Yeah, but you’re the one who got it in—hmmm.” He rolled his hips and Remus’ warm palms squeezed his ass gently. Lips moved down his neck, pausing to nip a hickey on the hinge of his jaw. A shiver ran through him, and he felt Remus grin. “I love it when you do that.”
“I can tell.” Sirius moved his hands further down, but Remus reached up and pinned them to the bed by his wrists. “Nope.”
“Really?”
“Mhm. You asked me what I want, and I want you.” Remus loosened his hold and leaned back to scan his face. “Is that okay?”
“Uh, yeah.”
“Consent is sexy.” Remus snapped the edge of his waistband lightly, looking around. “Do you know where the lube is?”
“What?” Sirius sat up on his elbows. “Wasn’t it on the bed?”
“I thought so, but I don’t see it anywhere.” After a moment of deliberation, Remus slid off his lap and began to straighten the sheets out, muttering under his breath. “It was here, right? I’m not going crazy?”
“Non, it definitely was.” Sirius got to his feet and joined the search, but he didn’t see the blue-tinted bottle anywhere. “Okay, you took it out of the dresser and hit your hand, then I put it here—” He tapped the right side of the bed. “—and I don’t think it moved much until after the thigh incident when we used it again.”
“Have we become those old people already?” Remus asked as he got to his knees and reached under the bed. “I’m 25, I can’t lose track of the lube yet. That’s got to be some sort of warning sign.”
“The only warning sign is that we’re both going to go to bed horny if we don’t find it,” Sirius grumbled, picking a dust bunny off his hand and shuddering.
“…not necessarily.”
He paused. “Fair point. Oh! Found it!” They must have moved more than Sirius remembered, because the lube had ended up wedged between the nightstand and the bedframe. “If I find any spiders down here, I’m going to scream.”
“Oh, you’ll be screaming alright,” Remus said as he flopped down on the bed and winked down at him.
“See, I know you love me when you still make sex jokes while I’m elbow-deep in dust because both of us are too lazy to move these and vacuum.” He groped around for a second longer before his fingers closed around a familiar tube and he drew his arm out. Unfortunately, something brushed against the back of his hand mere inches from the light and he shouted in alarm, scrambling away from the nightstand like it burned him.
“Are you okay?” Remus asked, looking mildly alarmed.
Sirius scooted forward slowly, all his senses on high alert as he retrieved the lube. “Oh my fucking god, Remus.”
“What?”
“A sock? Really?” He reached back in and grabbed the stray sock, shaking it out as evidence. “I thought this was a spider!”
Remus was clearly biting back a smile as Sirius threw the sock in the laundry hamper that was literally three feet from the bed. “I love you?”
“I love you, too.”
“Now that you’ve successfully completed your rescue mission, can I make it up to you?” He sat up on his knees and drew Sirius back in with two arms around his waist, leaning up for a kiss.
“You’re lucky you’re cute,” Sirius said as he obliged, allowing himself to be pushed into the mattress as Remus returned to his earlier position. The slight break had definitely had a negative effect on his general horniness, but it came back quickly enough under the heated touch of his fiancé. By the time Remus got around to sliding his pants down his legs, he was a puddle of bliss.
“Are you ready?” Remus asked, kissing the dip of his hipbones. “For real this time.”
“Hell yes.” Sirius handed him the lube and settled back into the pillows with a sigh, closing his eyes as the cap clicked and one of Remus’ hands pushed his thighs apart.
He took his time, mapping Sirius’ torso with kisses and love bites while his long fingers pulled and pressed in all the right places. It wasn’t until Sirius was keening on every breath that he finally slicked himself, distracting him from the initial pressure with a bruising kiss that seemed more fitting with the energy they had come to the house with all those few hours ago. “You’re so loud.” Remus grinned against his cheek when a particularly excellent thrust made Sirius moan.
“Says you,” he managed, nipping at his earlobe. “Fuck, that’s good.”
“How should we celebrate that beautiful assist?” Remus asked. Sirius was rather glad he sounded like he wasn’t expecting an answer, because at that moment his shaft slid against his prostate and the world went staticky for a second. “This seems to be working well enough.”
“You’re too coherent,” Sirius panted, gripping his waist tightly. “Merde, sweetheart, there—this night was supposed to be about getting you off.”
Remus’ quiet laugh was a little too tense around the edges to be as casual as he clearly wanted to make it and a sense of satisfaction joined the bubbling arousal in Sirius’ abdomen. “Believe me, baby, this is doing it well enough.”
“I can do better than ‘well enough’,” Sirius muttered, hitching his leg up and flipping them over to slide onto his lap slowly, relishing in the steady drag. He let his head fall back slightly and adjusted his knees into a better position. “Huh. This is actually kind of difficult after a game.”
“Told you so.” Beneath his hands, Remus’ chest was heaving, and he looked back down to see his eyes were wide.
Take it slow, he reminded himself. “At first I thought you were just being a baby about it, but apparently not,” he teased, pushing himself up a few inches before dropping down.
Thankfully, Remus didn’t immediately kick him out of the bed for bringing up the thigh incident. Instead, he cocked one eyebrow and started pushing his hips up to meet Sirius’ movements. “When have I ever been a baby about anything?”
Sirius pretended to think for a moment, then dissolved into laughter when Remus smacked him on the thigh. “Never, mon coeur.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” Remus pushed him down with slightly more force and Sirius’ knees jerked inward reflexively. “Oooo, okay then.”
He did it again and Sirius’ back bowed, forcing him to prop his elbows on Remus’ chest. The sparkles faded from his vision after an indeterminate amount of time and he tried in vain to catch his breath, twisting a handful of sheets in his hand. “Close.”
“Close to what?” Remus’ voice was low and a little raspy, sending tingles down his spine.
“Close.”
“Not yet, you’re not. Can you sit up?” Sirius’ forearms nearly gave out, but he succeeded. Remus stopped moving beneath him. “Can you—can you loosen your grip a bit?”
“Huh?” Sirius blinked away some of the muddled dizziness; the snarky, dominant angles of Remus’ face had faded, replaced by discomfort. He frowned and let go of his shoulders, which he had been gripping for leverage and emotional support and—“Oh. Oh, sweetheart, I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, just a little tight,” Remus assured him, running his hands along Sirius’ waist and ribs. The marks on his skin where Sirius’ fingertips had dug in were light, all things considered, but guilt trickled in when he saw the placement. “Hey. I’m fine, baby, really.”
“I’m so sorry, Re. I should’ve been paying more attention—”
“Stop. Look at me.”
“I am looking at you.”
Remus squeezed his hips lightly. “Look at me, Sirius. I’m okay. It was not your fault. Honestly, I’m a little flattered that I could make you stop thinking.” He reached up and pressed his thumb between Sirius’ eyebrows to smooth out the worry crease.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
“Consent is sexy,” he reminded him. Remus smiled up at him, bright and brilliant and so beautiful, then closed his eyes as Sirius circled his hips. This closeness with Remus never failed to set him alight from the inside, no matter how they did it. He was exhausted from the game and from coming twice already, but he was afraid he’d simply burn up if he stopped moving now.
“Oh, fuck,” Remus choked out; one of his knees drew up against Sirius’ lower back, which tilted him at just the right angle to brush his sweet spot with every thrust. “Fuck, baby, yes.”
The last shred of awareness left in his mind registered a string of desperate sounds rushing from his lungs, half-syllables of Remus’ name between wobbling whimpers and pleas for more, more, more.
“Come on, come for me.” He knew that voice. That voice featured in all of his best dreams, starred in his favorite memories, and highlighted everything he needed. That voice brought him home when he was lost in the dark. “Sirius, come for me.”
A wave of pleasure ripple down his back and he came, gasping and writhing, distantly acknowledging Remus’ moan when he followed suit with a final push. His thighs were completely numb when he laid down on his back, turning to drink in the sight of Remus’ flushed profile in the low light. He could barely see the places his fingers had been before around the pink of his post-orgasm skin. “Can we skip the shower?” he asked after a moment of astonished silence.
Remus nodded, laughing lightly as he looked over. “Yes, we definitely can.”
“I hate going to bed all sticky, but I don’t think my legs are functioning anymore.”
Remus kissed the tip of his nose and rolled onto his side so their knees touched. “I would love to agree with whatever you just said, but your accent is so thick right now and my brain is gone, which is not the ideal combination.”
“Doesn’t matter,” Sirius murmured, kissing him chastely on the lips and wrapping an arm around his shoulders to pull him close. “C’est bon.”
“I’ll take your word for it,” Remus yawned, snuggling closer and tangling their calves together.
“Hey.”
“Hmmm?”
“You played your first NHL game. And you scored two goals.”
“Hey.”
“Hmm?”
“I played next to you in my first NHL game.”
A slow, sleepy smile spread across Sirius’ face. “Yeah, you did.”
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tabletopmayhem · 3 years ago
Text
Errol left the church at half past nine, feeling very little catharsis for his conversations.
The Reverend had been slowly coming around to discussing thornier subjects than mere philosophy and bible study.  It’d been slow progress, but the fact that he was willing to discuss it at all was hopeful.  Optimism aside, Errol had absolutely no faith at all that the Bishop over at the Cathedral would feel the same.  
Well.
Catholicism had given up on him a very long time ago, and unfortunately that was a reality he was left with no choice but to accept.  He was unwelcome.  Not by God, of course, but by those who claimed to be the sole inheritors of His intent.  So it went.
So it always had been.
And so it would be in the future, if no one ever sought change.
Fishing his keys out from the pocket of his jacket, he swung them around with his index finger through the ring, enjoying the jingle.  The night air was sharp, the dusting of snow on the ground crunching under his shoes as he headed across the dark and lonely parking lot, the city spilled out beyond the hill that curved down towards it.  
Every night, the city seemed to get brighter.
“Pretty soon they may banish the stars altogether.”
It wasn’t for himself, but for the presence he could feel lurking around his vehicle at the edge of the lot.  A familiar beastial presence, prickling at his own with its usual goading restlessness.  Sometimes he wondered if the beast truly was only born of the blood, for he could feel much of Nathan in that creature.
“I want to go down and see what Durand is up to.  He said I’m welcome to observe, so I damn well plan to,” a raspy voice replied out of the darkness.
As Errol approached, he could smell the acrid smoke of a cigarette, cutting through the scent of winter.
It was the fifth time in two weeks he’d seen Nathan LeMarc, which was strange.  Usually he saw him once a month, or whenever the Prince summoned everyone to Elysium.  But Nathan kept hovering around lately, as if he needed something– or needed to say something.
“You told me you were done with the sticks.”
“I tell you a lot of things,” Nathan replied in a lazy slur.
He sat on the hood of Errol’s pristine white and chrome Plymouth, elbows on his scraped knees, shoulders hunched, heels braced on the bumper.  He looked like any punk that might hang out at night causing trouble, in the beat up leather jacket, slicked back hair, and blue jeans, but Nathan was anything but.  Those bright blue eyes were a predator’s eyes.  And so was the devilish smile.
Errol was feeling less sanguine.  “I just waxed this thing yesterday.  Washed it myself, too.”
Nathan’s grin only widened.  “It’s just a car.  So, did the Father tell you it’s okay to be gay yet?”
“No,” Errol said, lifting his shoulders in a shrug.  The cigarette was offered to him, and he took it, dropping it on the ground and grinding it out with the toe of his shoe.  “Not in my car.”
“You’ve been doing this for ages.  What are you expecting to get out of it?”
Okay, well, he’d come here looking for a fight.  Apparently.
“I’m not expecting anything.  Am I not allowed hope?” Errol asked, leaning against the hood of the car, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jacket.  
Nathan scowled, reaching up and slicking back his dark hair before reaching into his leather jacket.  Errol stifled a roll of his eyes as a pack of cigarettes emerged.  
“You phrase it like that and you make me feel like a bully.  Relax.  I just hate to see you setting yourself up for failure like this.  They’re not worth your time.”
“I don’t necessarily think it’ll have to be failure.  Nothing is doomed.  Not even us.”
“Just go to church anyways if it means that much to you!  You don’t have to tell them you’re gay.”
“I don’t want to lie.”
Nathan stared at him, and then shook his head, shoving the cigarettes back in his jacket.  “Come on.  Let’s go.  Give me your keys.”
Errol laughed.  “You’re not driving my car.”
“You drive like my grandma.”
“Your grandmother is a skull you keep on a shelf in your basement.”
“And yet…”  Nathan leaned over and snatched the keys out of his hand, practically dislocating his finger in the process.  “Too slow, turtle-boy.”
Errol shook his hand, letting out a long sigh.  “Don’t change the radio.  Why are you so punchy tonight?”
Nathan didn’t say a word as they both swung into the car.  It was a few years old now, but he prided himself that it was nearly the same condition as when he’d driven it off the lot in 57’.  Apart from a small tear in the white leather in the back from Owen, and a small burn from the last time Nathan had promised he wouldn’t smoke in the car.
Having friends could be frustrating.
The engine growled to life, and Nathan hit the gas practically before he’d had the chance to slam the door closed.  Gravel crunched as they headed out and down the hill, towards the lights of Seattle below.  They drove for a while with just the tinny sound of the radio, music spilling out.  When Nathan’s hand went for the dial, Errol silently smacked it away.
Their usual fight.
Once they hit 99 Nathan finally spoke again.  “I hate seeing you get your damned heart broken over and over.  Even if one day they say ‘you can take sacrement even though you’re gay’, they’re never going to accept the rest of you.” 
Errol frowned, surprised by the pessimism.  Nathan was many things, but a pessimist wasn’t one of them, generally.  “And why not?  We never chose this life.  Je pense, donc je suis.  And what I am is a person, just like everyone else.”
“Sure, you might be, but what you am ain’t human,” Nathan countered with a rough chuckle.  “There’s no way they’re going to let a vampire take the ol’ body and blood.”
“You never know until you try.  You spend too much time listening to people who tell you that you’re evil.”
“They're right.  Look at what happened to my whole family, what they did,” Nathan replied sourly.  “Wiped out, because we need to be for the good of everyone.  They unpeopled a whole chunk of Ohio until they were burned out.”
Errol gave him an amused sidelong look.  “They, not you.  I don’t think it’s wrong to acknowledge you need boundaries imposed on you.  You seem to think that accepting that you shouldn’t embrace means that you have to accept everything they say about you, which simply isn’t true.  No, your sire should not have embraced you.  Or any of the other dozens he did.  But he did.  What does that have to do with you?  Absolutely nothing.”
“It has to do with me because it’s what I am.  I’m a damned Locust, it’s in my blood, and my blood is doomed to slaughter.  Aren’t you one of those that believes in original sin?”
“No,” Errol said, intercepting another habitual cigarette that was fished out before Nathan could bring it to his lips, throwing it out his window.  “My boundaries also exist for a reason.  Stop it.  No smoking in the car.”
“Relax, Altar Boy.”
“Don’t tell me what to do, Farm Boy.”
“I’ll buy you a dozen pretty cars if I ding it, stop getting your drawers in a twist.  You’re so uptight.”
“If you call me ‘daddy-o’, I’ll throw you off a cliff and mail what lands at the bottom to Jane,” Errol said, letting his arm dangle out of the window.  “Cash on delivery.”
“There’s my boy.”
The heart of the city was approaching, and with it the lights that bathed the pavement in a white glow.  Although he enjoyed driving, the street lights he wasn’t enthralled with.  They made it too hard to see the sky.  Now, a cruise down one of the old highways in the middle of the night, sky overhead and the top down?  That was a drive worth having…for no other reason than to have it.
He watched the lights flicker across his arm like an old movie.  “One day it’ll be nothing but lights.  Well.  I suppose we’ve always been afraid of the dark.”
“Them, not us,” Nathan said, glancing sidelong at him with a feral grin.  “It’s the humans that are scared of the dark.  We are the dark.  That’s why they’re so afraid of us.  That’s why they’ll never accept you.”
“You’re being unkind tonight.”
Nathan’s smile faded, and he jerked his stare forward again, expression turning pensive.  His fingers tapped restlessly on the wheel.  “I just don’t want you hurt.  You’re too good for all of this horseshit.”
“You and your pedestals.  We’re all going to disappoint you one day, and what will you do when you’ve put us up so high?”
“You won’t.”
Erroll turned his attention out the window, having no response that wouldn’t be cruel.  Sometimes he’d forget how young Nathan was, and then he’d go and say things like that.  It was jarring.
If only he could stop seeing nothing but the bad in himself, and the good in everyone else.  Nathan wasn’t stupid– in fact, he was one of the smartest people Errol had ever met, but in a way that was all inborn.  Cleverness, survival instincts, and a lot of charm…but very little introspection.
Errol had been out of the heart of the city for a while, and it was jarring to see what was waiting for him as they reached their destination.  Nathan was looking at him expectantly as he pulled the keys from the ignition, resting an arm atop the wheel and leaning in.  “So…what do ya think?”
The strange skeleton of steel that towered above them was a bizarre thing, with three laddered legs that came up to a point and then flared out to support some sort of saucer.
“What in the name of-”
Nathan grinned.  “It’s Adrien Durand’s.  Six hundred feet tall.  See that round bit?  Going to be a restaurant.  They’re calling it the ‘Space Needle’.”
Mind blank, Errol tried to comprehend the purpose behind such a- “But why?”
“World’s Fair next year.  Ugly thing, isn’t it?  Owen said it’s going to end up looking like a cock, and I can’t say he’s wrong.”
Baffled, he pushed open the door and swung out, closing it on Nathan’s amused cackle.  Shoving his hands in his pockets, he walked down the sidewalk towards the monstrosity, craning his neck up to look at it.  It stood, like some mockery of ancient monoliths, or something from one of Owen’s science fiction movies.
“Are we certain the Ordo Dracul isn’t creating this…thing for some profane ritual?” Errol asked, hearing Nathan prowling up behind him.
An arm slung across his shoulders.  “No, no we’re not.  But Oya looked over all the permits and things, she approved it.”
Oya, right.  He kept forgetting to call Jane by her new chosen name, which was his fault entirely, but she seemed to have decided he was doing it on purpose.  He’d never been friends with the Prince, not precisely, but they’d not been enemies, either.  She was getting prickly with him as of late, though.
“She should have rejected it on aesthetic grounds, really,” he murmured.
“What are we doing tonight?”
“Oh look,” a voice cut in from the darkness, annoyed and mostly-americanized, with only a hint of the old accent he’d been trying to get rid of.  “If it isn’t the greaser and the beatnik.”
Walking up the sidewalk towards them, hands in the pockets of his long gray coat, the slim, grim figure of Ivanov approached.  The leader of the Ordo Dracul was fairly unassuming, but with a harsh, cold look in his eyes and a beast that spoke of Ventrue strength.  Nathan’s posture stayed relaxed, but Errol couldn’t help drawing himself up.
Nathan’s hand squeezed his shoulder, an attempt at comfort, but he couldn’t stop bristling slightly.
“Just coming to take a look at the progress, Ivan.”  Nathan whistled in admiration, tilting his head back.  “Boy she’s a big one.  Not as big as the Chrysler Building, I’d wager, but not bad!”
“It’s the biggest structure west of the Mississippi,” Ivanov said blankly.  His eyes scanned across both of them, eyeing Errol for a few seconds too long.  Just to make him jumpy, no doubt.
Nathan smiled.  “Wow-ee, imagine that, huh?”
“You’d know that, if you were capable of reading the specifications,”  Ivanov said, standing just below them on the sidewalk.
Fighting back his beast’s sudden surge of anger at the nastiness from the Ventrue, Errol clenched his teeth and fought to keep his face blank.  Ivanov met his eyes, and smiled a small, coldly amused smile.  “A problem?”
“Your manners,” Errol replied, clipped.
“Illiterate Locusts and human-loving fools can win a war, but we shall see if they can hold a city,” Ivanov replied.  “Please step aside so that I might pass.”
Rage was rising, furious and hard.  Well, if he wasn’t going to have any manners… “Perhaps you should-”
“You got it,” Nathan said cheerfully, fingers digging into Errol’s shoulder as he pulled him down and off of the sidewalk, into the street.  The beast snarled, furious with the insults, straining against the leash of self-control as Ivanov walked past them.
“Have a good night, Ivan!”
Ivanov paused briefly, now standing above them on the sidewalk, and fixed Errol with one last look.  “Get a haircut,” he said, clipped, and then continued on his way.  As he disappeared, there was a quietly muttered: ‘Daevas.’.
“Okay, come on,” Nathan said quietly, turning in to face Errol, grabbing him securely by both shoulders and pushing him down the hill.
There was no point fighting it, the closer he was to the fucking Ventrue, the closer his beast would be to losing control.  He walked backwards through decaying leaves and autumn sludge, eyes locked on Nathan, beast snapping at its boundaries.  “Who owns this city?”
“We do.  And we’re going to keep owning it.  They know that, and they know they’re only here because we let them be here.  They hate that, and they’re just trying to get their dignity back.  That’s all this is.  Let it go.  It’s nothing.”
“Jesus had long hair,” Errol muttered, and then abruptly stopped and shrugged, pushing Nathan’s hands off of his shoulders.  “I’m in control, I’m all right.”  Turning away, he paced down, and then turned and came back, raking his hair back with both hands.
Nathan threw up his hands.  “You almost started a fight with an elder!  You gotta stop doing this, Oya’s told you-”
Damn it, why did he have to keep defending this?
When they’d called an end to the war, it was only Nathan’s interference and his friendship with Jane that had let the other covenants stay.  And for that gracious philanthropy, they treated him like trash!  If only the idiot would stand up for himself more!  He let everyone walk all over him, and Jane just allowed it!
Errol cut him off with a slash of his hand through the air.  “Maybe they should have a bit more respect for you, then.  I don’t care what they say about me, but you’re the only reason they’re not dead, and if they really wish for that to no longer be the case, I can certainly-”
His hand was jabbing out again, but it only came into contact with a thin t-shirt as Nathan stepped in against him.
He reached out and grabbed the back of Errol’s neck in a vice grip, pulling their foreheads together.  The contact was grounding, and although the anger of the beast receded, the anger of the man remained.  An old, frustrated anger.
He closed his eyes, exhausted.  “Why do you let them treat you this way?”
“Haven’t I been asking you the same thing tonight?”
“Entirely different things,” Errol denied.
“I am a farm boy who can’t read,” Nathan said, the slur in his voice dripping with fond amusement.  “And I’m a Locust.  A kindred plague.  Embraced by bad blood.  Is me getting mad going to change that?”
Forcing himself to meet Nathan’s eyes, so close that they were burning into him like the heart of a flame, Errol put every ounce of conviction he could into his voice.  “You are not evil.”
Nathan dropped his eyes, smiling with chagrin.  “Then what am I?”
Irritated, he grabbed the idiot by the front of his shirt and dragged him in.  “Too good for these bastards.  Don’t let them drag you down like this.”
Nathan laughed, a little sharp and dismissive, grabbing him by the wrist and shoving him away.  The t-shirt tore, but neither of them let go.  Nathan’s fingers tightened, pressing between the bones of his arm.  “Too good.  Right.  You ever stop to think that maybe it’s you that’s thinking too much of me?  Maybe you’re the one who’s too good.”
“Too good for what?” Errol asked, feeling the evasion– and not for the first time.
He sure as hell knew it wasn’t because he was a man.
“It doesn’t matter,” Nathan muttered, letting go of his wrist.
“Too good for what?” Errol repeated, voice softening.  Usually he’d let him escape, but everyone had their breaking point.  Even him.  “Too good for what, Nathan?”
“Let go of me.”
He released the t-shirt, pressing his palm to Nathan’s chest and shoving him back a full step.  Nathan swayed back, lifting a hand to smooth over his hair.  Head hanging low, he shook it, taking another step back.
“Give me my keys.”
“Come on,” Nathan muttered awkwardly, shoving his hands in his pockets.   “This doesn’t have to be anything.”
“If you say so.  Keys.”
With predictable Seattle timing, the misty haze in the air was turning into proper rain, no doubt soon to be an Autumn storm.  Errol didn’t bother to close his jacket against it, he just stood there, hand out expectantly.  Nathan stepped back again, and then abruptly started prowling back and forth across the sidewalk and into the street, both hands raking through his hair.  His frustration was palpable, not just in the predatory stalking, but in the uneasiness of the beast.  
They were both on-edge now.
“Keys.”
“Shut up about the fuckin’ keys!”
“Stop me!” Errol suggested, throwing both hands up.  “Please, I’d welcome a punch at this point!”
“You want to fight?  Is that what you want?”  Nathan asked, rounding on him aggressively.
He really had no damned idea what he was doing, did he?  
“Would you stop talking and kiss me already?!”
Errol hadn’t meant to say it, he hadn’t meant to push.  He was well aware that people needed different things, and sometimes an infatuation was only that.  But it had become increasingly clear that Nathan was only worried about being inferior, and that was damn well infuriating.
It could have backfired.
Terribly.
But instead Nathan finally stopped being ridiculous and surged towards him.  His fingers as both hands caught his jaw were a little too tight, a bit too desperate, but it was a welcome discomfort as they finally met in a fierce, almost antagonistic kiss.  It was hard, hungry, but as Errol wrapped his arms around him and banished the space between their bodies, some of that torrid desperation in his lips eased.
The kiss softened and the conflict eased, eventually breaking.
A few small, private seconds passed in the quiet space between them as the rain sheeted down, and then Nathan laughed, awkwardly.
His head thumped forward, landing on Errol’s shoulder.  With a smile, he lifted his arms higher, wrapping them around his shoulders, pulling Nathan in tight.  “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”
The response was muffled, tentative.  “You sure?  I’m a mess.  I don’t want to lose you.”
“You’re not going to lose me.  I’ll always be your friend, no matter what happens,” Errol reassured him, feeling confident in that.  “Just…try to remember I’m not perfect.  And that you’re not as bad as you think you are.”
“That’s a tall order,” Nathan said, pulling back.  And then he glanced around them and gave a faint curse, abruptly pulling back, hands on Errol’s shoulders.  “Shit!  I’m sorry.  I forget how people can be.”
“It’s late, it’s raining,” Errol assured him, reaching up and taking his hand, but heading back to the car regardless.  Just in case.  There was always a chance someone saw them and called the police.  “I’m well aware of how shameless you are, it’s not a surprise.  Let’s get out of here.”
“You sure?”
The two words were laden with a lot of nuance.  Errol smiled to himself, shaking his head.  It seemed like he was going to have to get it through his thick head somehow.  It might take all night.
“I’m pretty sure I can find a way to convince you that I am.”
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fandom-blackhole · 3 years ago
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I'm back from my mandatory two day socialization recovery period required for all socialization even if I enjoy it. It's time for some Mermaid!Din au thoughts (No thots unfortunately but we'll live)
First off I love the isolation that the reader faces because of the lighthouse they live in. And I love how the townspeople being nice to the reader help give them a reason to stick around when weird things start happening.
I love how it took months before anything strange starts happening, like were Din and Grogu just not around or were they observing the reader. Did Din ever try to stop Grogu from damaging the lighthouse or did he let the little rascal do as he pleased.
· And gosh I love the idea of reader dressing in old worn clothing, a knit sweater with fraying sleeves, sweat pants covered in paint from repairs, an old windbreaker to help keep the cold out. It makes me heart all warm and fuzzy.
Edna, who i've head cannoned as this series Miss Chatham (H2O: just add water charter) is honestly life goals. Like live near ocean - check(ish), have rare knowledge that can be used to help new person - check, being just slightly spooky -amazing. And is that a little matchmaker I see her playing? I love it.
Then Grogu being injured :( I bet that Din is absolutely being eaten alive by guilt even though we all know it’s not his fault and he does literally anything he can to keep Grogu safe and happy.
And In love how Din is venerable enough to ask for help, like he recognizes that this is something out of his area of expertise so he goes to the person he knows is “safe” to get help. He’s humble enough to admit that he needs help and is not capable of doing everything for Grogu. And being able to admit that is an important life skill that not enough people have.
· But even after he ask the reader for help he is still hesitant which shows that even though hes trusting reader he will still kick (is it still a kick if its with a tail) the readers ass if he hurts him.
“But you can help him” Oh my heart the trust in that sentence. Like Din just heard, “so yeah I can help your son but I have to take him somewhere it will be hard for you to follow. And he needs to stay there for at least a week, and even if you manage to come its going to be so far from your natural element.” But he was still on board with the plan. And then he goes to climb on the rock so he can drag himself all the way to the light house because he can’t let his little boy go alone even if it means hurting himself to do it.
Reader was smart af for doing the old blanket slipperaroo trick
Reader immediately knowing something was up when she walked into town is so realistic. She literally is hiding a massive secret at her lighthouse of course anyone would be on edge walking back into society. Especially a society that already knows a little something about the secret. But them to amplify it. Miss Chatham to the rescue. She knows that reader is up to something and she uses her powers as an old lady with lungs and karen potential to scare off the problem for a little bit. The reader just placed so much trust on Edna by straight up telling her that she's housing Din and Grogu.
· Also that fool browsing the menstrual hygiene rack, like dumbass. Is this your way of making him miss every shot? Because we know that storm troopers are well known for their ability to miss every shot so making him automatically turn to tampons? Genius
Cashier for the win, like beep beep bitch now pay up
The "cyare" omg and then the reader warning Din about the cookies and him being so curious about them. The way Din is so perceptive of the readers mood that he is already able to tell that something is wrong. It was such a smart idea to have the reader lead with asking him to give her a small chance to calm down about what happened in the town.
Din and the reader low-key flirting and teasing each other at the end is so adorable. Grogu with the cookie absolutely melts my heart like of course that boy is hungry.
So this is a slightly polished layout of my stream of consciousness while reading this. Does it make sense? Probably not. But I love this idea and you have done it justice.
Ahhhhhhz thank you for all of the lovely thoughts and compliments, im glad you like my story and I hope it continuesto meet your expectations!!!! And you made perfect sense darling!
To reply to some things:
Honestly, I chose the isolation for two reasons, 1- it made sense, especially for how the plot is going to play out, privacy and isolation is needed, and 2- im introverted and I like being alone, so I just projected
The town's people are great! They are used to having lighthouse keepers just up and leave because of all the weird stuff, so the second that one sticks around they were all overjoyed, because like I said, a lot of the people work on boats fishing so the lighthouse is super important to them
Din did wait and observe the reader, wanting to know what to do when to attempt to scare them off. But also like no, he tried keeping Grogu away from the lighthouse as much as possible, not knowing what the reader might do to him, and just being a protective father, but we all know Grogu is a little shit and he snuck out before Din could stop him
Reader dresses in the COMFIEST clothes, and honestly, I am very much a sweater and comfy leggings kind of person, so again, something I am projecting
I love that you and everyone is loving Edna, she is definitely one of those cool old ladies that sneak you treats and shenanigans when no one is looking!
Also because idk if anyone has pointed it out.... in the last chapter I thought I was heavily hinting at it, but maybe it was more subtle than I thought, Edna and her MERMAID were alot more than friends *wink wink* she's gay as fuck and thats why she made the joke about not liking NUTS
Din loves Grogu, in and out of this AU, and it was 1000% not his fault that Grogu got hurt, in fact he was trying to protect him! Din definitely panicked and the first person that came to mind was the reader, and while he didn't know them, he knew for some reason they were safe to go to for help (as well as knowing the lighthouse would be a good place to hide while some things cooled down 👀), but Din will always be cautious because he is scared for his son
Din is just *chef's kiss* 👌, an amazing father who will do ANYTHING for his son, no matter what it takes
The whole blanket thing literally came from my childhood, thinking about how my sisters and I would drag eachother around on blankets, and I just thought it would be great for this scenario
Like the reader is gonna get real paranoid during this series, im not going to lie to you, things are gonna get rough, but Edna is the MVP she's one of those people that could pull your darkest secrets from you just by glancing at you, and the reader pretty much assumed she was safe to talk to after she had informed her about the food offerings
Ok ok, as for the dudes, I was too lazy to look up their names and stuff but they were these dudes from season 1 that gave Din Grogu's bounty: the first dude is the one 'hiding' in the women's hygiene section
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Din is just obsessed for human food at this point, and he feels things for the reader even of he doesn't want to admit it quite yet
Din also may be oblivious as fuck, but he's also observant, hes a bounty hunter for fucks sake, he needs to be able to pick up on these things, so yes in my stories Din is really good at picking up on emotions, even if he doesn't fully know how to react to them
Im aiming for a slow burn foc, but to be honest with you all, chances are it is going to be a regularly paced romance, which for my writing is slow paced, so yeah the idiots are flirting and teasing eachother, but also like they will not be talking about or admitting feelings for at least a few more chapters
Grpgu deserves all the cookies!!! He's a growing tadpole, who has been magically healing himself while in a coma like state, so he hasnt eaten in days, and if he wanted he'd probably be able to devour 2x his body weight and then some, so a few cookies recieved in some kind of mysterious way are well achieved
Merman!Din Tags: @writeforfandoms @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @honey-goth  @mando-abs @lux-cream-67 @rachelle-on-the-run @katcharm   @ladamari68 @bluegalaxyprime @my-life-as-a-bird @altarsw @zarakem @stargazingthenightaway
(Added the taglist in case any of you guys wanted to read over my thoughts and things bc I have some hcs and cleared somethings up ypu may be wondering about)
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spunkpunx · 4 years ago
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Are Friends Electric? (Alex Turner)
Multi Part Series
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Part 1: Dreamy Days
Sheffield 2002
"Is that a fookin' United shirt?"
"Yeah, so what? It's not mine, you know I support Owls."
"Am honestly disappointed in you, consortin' with the enemy an' that," Alex shook his head, refusing to look at the offending football shirt that I'd been forced into wearing.
"It was in lost property, an' you know what the PE teachers are like, they threatened to suspend me, Mam would kill me if they did," I replied, rubbing her legs in an attempt to warm them.
"Only 'cause you've been suspended before."
"Yeah well I don't want to do it again, she'd have me bloody guts for garters," I told him. He rolled his eyes. We were sat on an old bench around the back of the school, dressed in PE kits and smoking B&H cigarettes I had stolen off my mother. My football shorts were no match for the harsh January weather, but I was wearing a parka, hence why Alex had only just noticed the Sheffield United t-shirt. We couldn't leave school grounds yet, because in order to get out from behind we'd would have to go past the French classroom, and as the bell hadn't yet gone, there would still be Miss Kelly and a class of year 7s ready to catch us out.
"I'm fookin' freezing," Alex whined, putting out his fag on the wall and dropping it onto the floor. "At least you've got that bloody big coat."
I sighed and flicked my cigarette butt onto the floor, stomping it out with the toe of my trainer. "If we go over the wall you know you have to give me a leg up," I explained bluntly. He nodded along almost eagerly, likely desperate to get out the cold and home as soon as possible.
"I don't mind Jack, I just wanna leave."
"Right then," I replied, standing up, picking up my bag and putting a foot into a crack in the stone, grabbing the top edge where my fingers could just about catch grip on the rough stone. Alex came up behind me and put his hands on my shin, and using his hands to push against, I pulled herself up. Unfortunately, my foot slipped, and I began to fall back down, but my fall was stopped by the feeling of hands holding me up. Alex's hands, on my bum.
I felt my ears burning red, but not willing to have to try again, I pulled herself up using my arms and jumped down the other side. As soon as my feet touched the ground I climbed on top of the large wheelie bin that sat against the wall and grabbed Alex's arm as he clambered over as well. He was a lot taller than me now, he'd grown in a way only 15 year old boys do, all long limbs and clumsiness. I'd barely even noticed him shoot up. I helped him over and we jumped into the street below.
"Um... I'm sorry that I touched your..." Alex stuttered slightly, his cheeks going uncharacteristically red. I cut him off.
"Al, it's fine."
"I mean I-"
"It's fine," I repeated, more firmly. He shrugged and pushed his hands into his pockets, beginning to walk down the alley toward the road. I followed him, jogging slightly to catch up with his long strides.
"Am gonna join a band you know," he told me as we turned the corner onto the street. I looked at him in surprise.
"A band? Who wiv?" I questioned, confused.
"Matt."
"Matt Helders or Matt Sheppard?"
"Matt Helders of course! Av'e never even spoke to Matt Sheppard why on earth would I be talking about 'im?"
"Well I dunno do I? I didn't even know Matt Helders played an instrument, he's not singing is he?" I queried, scuffing my shoes along the floor.
Alex shook his head slightly. "He plays drums, I'm the singer."
"But you play guitar?" I could sense my brain was really struggling to keep up.
"I can do both, like Bowie."
"Don't compare yourself t'Bowie unless you go to your gigs dressed in a catsuit an' heels an' bat away crowds of lads and lasses who want to sleep with ya."
"I'm not against the crowds of lasses, but I don't think I could commit to the rest," he laughed cheekily. I gave him a playful punch in the shoulder.
"You're full of shit, you are," I grinned, as he rubbed his arm over-dramatically. Cars whizzed past as we reached the main road. Cars that caused slight rushes of air as the pair of us continued to walk, that's how close they drove past the pavement.  "Mine or yours?" I asked him.
"Yours, yer mam won't be back from work yet."
"Fairs."
A silence lulled in the conversation as we continued to walk down the street, Alex was scuffing his trainers along the floor. It was annoying as fuck but I didn't say owt.
"Did you hear what Rory Pike did today at lunch?"
"No?"
"He got his cock out on the school field," Alex divulged me, a laugh spread across his face. I couldn't help but join in the joke.
"Rory Pike is a world class minger," I told him, and soon we were both in stitches, adding extra gross details to the story to the amusement of each other.
"Did Cook finally ask tha' girl out then?" I changed the subject, catching my breath back from my laughing fit.
"'Course not, he jibbed again, then Simmo asked her instead," Alex explained.
"Simmo? Did she say yes?"
"Why would she? She clearly fancies Jamie."
"He needs to get his act together and ask her."
Alex nodded, momentarily in thought. He then very suddenly turned around and gave me a playful shove.
"First one to yours!" he exclaimed, quickly speeding off around the corner.
"Bastard," I muttered, beginning to run after him. I sprinted to catch up, but the awkward coat prevented me from getting anywhere near the speed his long limbs could get him. He legged it off and I was forced to slow my pace back down to a walk. The boy was clearly going to win and I had the house key so he'd have to wait outside for me anyway. I decided to take me time knowing I'd probably bump into Alex around the corner when he came back to see where I was. He'd probably be a bit moody about it, telling me off for being a fun sponge, and I'd apologise insincerely and then he'd give me an awkward side hug and tell me he couldn't stay angry at me, there's no way I'd let him. Then we would probably walk back to mine and be done with the matter.
This wasn't the case. I got round the corner, then the one after that, and didn't see any sign of Alex. There was no way he would still be running, he was too lazy and he would look like an idiot, racing against no one. He was a dafty but not that much of one. I began to get confused after I rounded the third corner and there was still not a sign of him.
"Oi Jackie!" Alex exclaimed, grabbing my shoulders from behind. I yelped in surprise and he burst out laughing.
"Fook you Alex Turner," I scolded him. "How did ya even get behind me?" He said nothing, and just tapped his nose conspiratorially.
Sheffield 2003
He knew everything there was to know about Jackie. He knew her favourite colour (red),her middle name (Arabella), her handwriting and everything else in between. Alex had known this for ages, but it had never weighed on his mind as much as it had recently.
It was the way he'd seen her the other night. There was a small gaff at someone or another's and Alex had gone with the boys. Jackie had showed up a bit later, dressed very differently to how he normally saw her. She had a leopard print mini skirt on and a tight, cropped t-shirt, along with her trainers and Adidas jacket. Of course he noticed her, lighting one of her L&B blues and trying to smoke it subtly; she was the only one smoking.
He had gone over and said hello, and she'd grinned when she saw him, glad of some company, he expected. Some 90s rave hit was playing, and cheesy lights flashed across the room. Trying too hard, he thought. She picked a beer off the counter she was leaning on and gave it to him. A Corona, lukewarm but still alcohol.
"D'ya wanna come for a spliff?" she asked him, patting her pocket, and he said yes. Her top was very tight, although he tried not to look, but he saw her bra, visible through the fabric. They went outside onto some kind of shitty balcony. She got what looked to be a large gram of weed and some Rizlas out, making an L and then ripping open a cigarette to get the tobacco out, she carefully sprinkled in some of the spliff and rolled. Alex didn't say anything, he just watched as she deftly rolled the joint. She lit the end and took her time, sitting down on a breeze block. He found himself a seat on the step.
"So how's t'band going, Arctic Monkeys i'nt it?"
"There's a gig coming up, at The Grapes," Alex told her, proudly. In fact, he puffed up slightly with pride. Jackie had never really got involved with the band, she said it weren't her business, but Alex still felt remarkably pleased whenever she showed an interest, especially if they were doing well.
"D'ya want me to come?"
"'Course! I thought you already were."
"Yeah I just... weren't sure, that's all," Jackie responded, unusually quiet. She was acting off with him.
"Is summit up?" Alex asked. She shrugged, taking another drag on her spliff and then handing it to him. "Jack?" he prompted further.
"It's nothing Al, jus' summit stupid," she replied. Her fingers fiddled with the edge of her sleeve. He decided to leave it, pushing her wouldn't make her tell him, it would just annoy her. He took a toke of the joint and they sat in silence for a moment.
"Wanna find some White Lightning and get hammered?" she asked and Alex grinned.
"Are you sure? That stuffs pretty lethal."
"Well fook it all we're not going home tonight," she replied, laughing slightly. Alex nodded, smiling, then passed her the spliff back. It was a still and cold night. Jackie let the smoke seep out her mouth and inhaled it through her nose.
They finished the spliff and went back inside. Alex found the rest of his mates and together they all got steaming. Simmo was acting strangely all night. Then Jackie started acting strange too. She was all quiet and snappy.
"Why were you being such a mardy bum yesterday," he asked her the next day. They were lounging about on the sofa at his, nursing two horrible headaches. She rolled her eyes at him.
"Not now Alex, I'm too hungover for this," she answered, misery clear in her voice.
"Just tell me and I'll stop naggin'" he told her, shuffling a bit closer so she couldn't turn over and ignore him.
"Your mate Simmo," she replied simply.
"What'dya mean? Look, I know the joke was a bit insensitive but tha's just what 'e's like," Alex began to explain, for some reason unknown to him, in Simmo's defence.
"It's not tha' you bloody great nit, he kissed me."
Alex couldn't explain why that came like a twist in the gut, but it did nonetheless. It made him stumble for his words for a moment.
"Oh," was all he managed to get out. "Did you kiss him back?"
"Of course not, he's funny, but a bit gross," Jackie replied, pulling a face, and Alex laughed. A strange sense of relief was felt somewhere in his system, although nowhere near enough to dull the queasy thud of his hangover. "'Sides, Chris asked me out the other day."
"Who the fook is Chris?"
"Chris Maher, from the garage."
"Him? You've lost your mind Jackie, he works at fookin' MotorWorld."
"He's funny! And he knows loads about cars, plus he can drive," she said stubbornly, crossing her arms.
"Why does it matter 'e can drive?"
"So I can get places, obviously," she responded dryly.
"I've almost passed me test!"
"Al, you're not even close to passing, I spoke to yer Dad an' he says you drive like you're drunk. 'Sides, I wouldn't want to get on your nerves, always cadgin' a lift." she explained, to Alex's disappointment.
"I didn't expect your type to be a guy who walks around in trackies, how desperate are ya?" Alex jabbed, a little cruelly. Jackie shot him a scathing look.
"Alexander, what is up with you? You were fine last night, an' now you're acting like I'm makin' you suck bloody lemons," she reprimanded him. She was trying to draw him into an argument, he could tell. He wasn't about to start a fight.
"Oh, it duen't matter," he said offhandedly, hoping to diffuse the issue, which seemed to work.
"He's actually a really lovely guy," Jackie added after a long pause.
"Ay, I'm sure he is," Alex replied halfheartedly.
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yayninjabob · 3 years ago
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Hi, I loved your story “Villain.” The characterization of everyone was really great, especially for Buttercup’s transformation into Joey. You feel bad for them, but you also feel for their family.
As for episodes in the classic series that show the girls darker sides, I didn’t have a problem with “A Very Special Blossom.” She had sympathetic motivations, and everyone understood where she was coming for in the end. However, she still got a fair punishment.
“Bubblevicious” was a good episode, but Bubbles got off way too easily for her crimes, in my opinion.
I wish Buttercup’s motivations in “Moral Decay” had been a bit more sympathetic than “I want to earn money by knocking out teeth just because,” but I do understand that the writers were trying to go for the greed addiction metaphor. While a lot of us in the fandom complain about her descent into villainy feeling contrived and OOC in “Moral Decay,” I think most of us could have accepted her getting punished for her crimes by having her teeth knocked out by every villain in the city, if the writers hadn’t chosen to involve Blossom and Bubbles in the set up, had them enjoy it, then made even Professor Utonium come across as being very uncharacteristically indifferent in regards to one of his daughters being hurt as comeuppance for her crimes, and then framed that as “okay.” Are we supposed to believe he knows what Blossom and Bubbles did to Buttercup, and he’s okay with that? It’s just entirely OOC for him, even if Buttercup is the low-key black sheep of the family, and Buttercup’s a character with superpowers, living in a cartoon with over-the top physical violence that they generally endure and fully recover from very quickly 99.9% of the time.
It’s not entirely clear if Blossom and Bubbles revealed to Professor that THEY were involved in the set up of Buttercup’s downfall at the end of “Moral Decay,” but they apparently told him about what she did shortly before that beat down they lured her into from the villains because he found her stash of coins. The fact that he doesn’t seem more concerned about Buttercup’s downfall, though, and Blossom and Bubbles aren’t punished implies unfortunate things, though, none of which are within his character.
I also just find it baffling that Professor Utonium wouldn’t feel at least partially guilty for Buttercup’s crimes and ultimate downfall since she had to have been doing this for at least 7-10 days behind their backs in “Moral Decay,” and he failed to notice what was happening before it was too late and she got hurt.
If the writers of “Moral Decay” had gone for the same resolution of Buttercup getting her teeth knocked out as comeuppance for her crimes by all the villains in the city in a cruel twist of fate without involving either of her sisters in the set up, then had the two of them and Professor Utonium still being understandably angry and disappointed in her for her crimes, but also sorry that she got hurt, I think fans would have felt a lot less pissed off. I know Buttercup’s always sort of been the low-key black sheep of the family, but it had never felt like her family hated her either. At the end of “Moral Decay,” it felt like she was hated, and that’s what made most fans feel pissed off. Yeah, Buttercup’s relationships with her sisters and her dad weren’t perfect, but it had never felt like she was this horribly abused, mistreated, neglected, or unloved child by her family either. I think “Moral Decay” gave off some unfortunate implications to fans that she kind of was in that episode at least, and I can’t totally disagree with them.
Yeah, Buttercup deserved punishment for her crimes, but I don’t think it was necessary to drag the entire Utonium family’s good reputation through the mud in “Moral Decay” to do it either.
Yo, I'm gonna be honest and admit that I quite like the episode "Moral Decay" haha.
You're not wrong though and I have seen this episode criticized by lots of fans that point out what you mention, so you're definitely not alone in that opinion. I guess I am just old school and I grew up with cartoons that were often just randomly OOC, over the top and the world would magically reset after some insane episodes- but personally it isn't a negative for me. I enjoy when shows- cartoons especially- don't take themself too seriously. I appreciate the "how far can we take this" approach- and if not in cartoons then where else is it appropriate to push the boundaries? Probably a little better done in the episode Down n Dirty but I still enjoy the episode for what it is.
Lazy or bad writing is different and I just don't think MD is an episode with lazy or bad writing. It's not my most favorite episode but I definitely get my lols from it haha and there are definitely worse episodes in the series. As a kid I would yank my own teeth out the moment I felt them going lose eager to get that tooth fairy cash once I realized it was a thing and so I personally enjoy that that sorta childhood phase was shown in this episode. Personally I always like episodes that show the puffs going through kid stuff but with the fun twist of having superpowers. Is it over the top? Yeah. Totally. But that montage with Buttercup knocking Bubbles at every turn gets a laugh from me every time haha- just the visual of Buttercup's slow reach while Bubbles is coloring before slamming her head onto the table- hilarious to me. I'm sorry haha but it gets me every time. 😅
Buttercup's treatment as "the black sheep" comes up elsewhere in the series and not just this episode. All of which lend to the inspiration for my fic "Villain" for sure. I am glad to hear you enjoy the story and that you feel the sympathy equally for Buttercup/Joey and their family. It definitely is an aim of mine to avoid portraying just one side as totally good or totally bad- Well... Except of course HIM haha. He's straight up evil.
Thanks for reading! And thanks so much for the ask and for sharing your thoughts! It is definitely fun to delve a little deeper into these episodes sometimes. :D
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pekorosu · 4 years ago
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just a lil “if ash lived” headcanon that i need to unload somewhere bc i've been holding it in for a long time
- set within the manga ‘verse
- takes place when ash and eiji are in their early 30s... so around the mid 1990s?
- i don’t get the weird animanga trope where older = longer hair, so they’re gonna look the same... maybe with slightly shorter hair bc they get regular haircuts now 
- (note: i've always interpreted long-haired eiji as symbolic of the fact that he couldn't move on from ash’s death)
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- ash and eiji will continue living in the states, idk if still in NYC or somewhere else. they’ll move around a lot though.
- ash will mostly remain underground as he had to fake his death after lao’s stab, but he does it in a "hiding in plain sight" kind of way. only a handful of people know he’s still alive.  
- ash spends most of his time on the computer, mostly coding, hacking, being a nerd, among other fun stuff.
- he also takes on “jobs” anonymously, and occasionally from max (who’s still into investigative journalism) when he needs info that can only be obtained through Dubious Means.
- i also like to think that ash's a bit of a hacker robin hood lol. but he isn’t doing it purely out of the goodness of his heart, as part of it is a subconscious need to atone for his “sins” and cleanse the gnawing and persistent feeling of shame that gets amplified when he’s around eiji.
- also whatever he’s up to these days would ofc still be Highly Dangerous and Illegal, but it keeps him busy and would sate the part of him that’s still hungry for adrenaline without him having to engage in stuff like active bloodshed or substance abuse. basically that’s how i imagine he’d try to cope with life the only way he knows.
- eiji continues to do photography and other part time gigs bc he does not like the idea of mooching off ash forever, and he slowly makes a name for himself.
- ash and eiji live together but they are NOT together in a romantic sense... not yet >:)
- therefore eiji will probably date other people in the meantime, which gets a little troublesome bc it's not like he can bring them home to where his secret Very Important Friend is secretly hiding.
- ash will maybe have one-night stands every now and then. or not. idk. this isn’t a very important detail.
- anyway there will be lots of clueless but mutual pining :)
- ash especially, is of the opinion that they should start living separately bc someone will eventually track him down, maybe someone who has a past or present grudge on him. combined with his current activities, it’s only a matter of time before eiji would unwittingly get dragged into his problems again.
- eiji is v adamantly against that plan bc he's sorta developed a debilitating sense of paranoia that ash might just get killed somewhere while he’s not looking. not that ash isn’t paranoid either, but his insecurities often tip the scale over to “eiji is safer away from me” than “with me”.
- basically they’re doing their whole “stay. no, leave. no, stay” dance all over again, but like, dragged out over MANY YEARS.
- you thought eiji’s letter would’ve cleared up any crossed wires? 
- HELL NO
- like yea, there was probably a beautiful honeymoon period of about a year or two after they reunited, before their respective trauma and issues started creeping in and fucking things up again.
- esp on ash’s end, i think he’d engage in a lot of self-sabotage. and eiji is only human, he has his own limits and baggage too.
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- there will be a government conspiracy plotline but on a smaller scale compared to canon that i am unfortunately not knowledgeable enough to worldbuild on, but it will probably have something to do with cybercrime/cyberterrorism/stuff like that bc it needs to tie in with ash's hacking shenanigans.
- i've heard that sing ends up becoming some sorta political big shot in yasha? idk, i haven't read it myself, but since china’s rising status was mentioned in GoL i imagine the plot should relate to that somehow.
- therefore sing would also get to be in this story! 
- i guess this means yut-lung would come into the picture at some point as well, and it would be a good opportunity for a redemption arc but i haven’t given it much of a thought bc i’m indifferent to his character orz SORRY.
- look i can’t do plot, but i am basically envisioning a political thriller with a side of slow burn romance (wait, you mean like a rehash of canon?)
- i’m thinking max is the one who kicks off the story by bringing something fishy to ash, and they just end up uncovering more and more and MORE stuff as they keep going.
- so for like 80% of the story, ash and eiji will be separated bc ash will be busy spying or infiltrating something... and being at the center of Plot Things, while max and eiji will be more on the outside dealing with the journalist side of things. i’m fond of max-ash interactions but i’m also REALLY CURIOUS about max-eiji’s dynamic :D
- meanwhile sing will be like, half in and half out i imagine. he's versatile like that lol
- ...i did NOT mean that in a dirty way
- anyway, this will provide ash and eiji ample space to work out their issues separately, as i think living in close quarters for so many years has actually been aggravating them. ofc those issues don’t get 100% resolved by the end, but some time apart from each other to cool off and spend with other people should provide a bit of perspective.
- i want ash to make some NEW FRIENDS (!!!) that are on the same wavelength as him bc there’s only so much that he can tell eiji and i’m sure he gets rather lonely, so there will be OCs that he will meet in the middle of Plot Things.
- ash will get trapped at some point. preferably with sing so they can have a much needed heart-to-heart talk. they’ll have a lot to hash out, ranging from the events in BF, shorter’s and lao’s death, all the way to ash’s love life. 
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- btw i like the idea of eiji and sing being close drinking buddies who confide in one another but ash is kinda, justalittle, not very happy about that LOL 
- i mean, it's not like eiji can confide in ash when ash is the topic at hand, ya get me? as for sing, he’s similar to ash in the sense that they live dangerous lives, so i imagine he just finds it nice to be able to hang out with someone mundane like eiji every now and then.
- not to say that ash and sing aren’t talking to each other at all, but i think they’d have a bit of a rift between them. sing probably does feel some resentment, both at ash for killing lao AND at himself bc he knows deep down that given a choice, he would’ve saved ash over his own brother. ash can sense that tortured vibe, so eiji’s like their middle man. AND THAT’S WHY THEY NEED A HEART-TO-HEART TALK
- (SIDE NOTE: i want akira to have a role in this too. i actually have a separate headcanon that happens prior to this story... kinda like an alternate GoL? 
akira goes to the states to visit eiji, but ash is also there, yeah? akira and ash start out sorta prickly with each other bc ash is all weird and standoffish and always cooped up in his room. she probably mistook him as a jobless model mooching off eiji at first since 1) eiji and ibe have never spoken about him back in japan (cuz he’s supposed to be dead), 2) why would eiji be living with some random hot guy? unless they met during one of his photography gigs? right??? 
and then she ends up witnessing them in the middle of a tiff, which makes her not like ash even more bc HOW DARE HE YELL AT POOR OKUMURA-SAN??? UNGRATEFUL JERK!!!
but over the course of her visit, she snoops around learns a bit about their history and gathers hints as to why their r’ship is kinda strained. also ash and akira somehow end up bonding (reluctantly) over their emotional insecurities and part on a friendly rivalry to win over eiji’s affections (which eiji is completely oblivious to. also akira may have been 100% serious but ash was just jokingly playing along with her (OR WAS HE???)). anyway long story short, ash teaches akira some cool tech/IT stuff along the way so that leads to her gaining an interest in the field. 
she won’t be able to do much in this story, but a minor role would be cool :)
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 ^ a lighthearted gyoza-making scene amid all the angst)
- (SIDE NOTE #2: i ALSO want cain to feature in this, but bc canon provided very little bg info on him it’s hard for me to figure out where he’d fit. but i suppose that’s precisely why it would be great to include him, since i can just make up my own backstory! lol. for now, i think he should be connected to one of the new OCs to make him more central to the plot. or heck, he can be involved himself! ...yeah, i’m just salty about how cain was treated more like a convenient plot device compared to the other major side characters. we barely know anything about him even though he was one of ash’s most trusted allies. #caindeservedbetter2k20)
- anyway, back to the main story. ash (and his new "friends") barely escape where they’re held hostage. ash would be rusty with combat now as he’s spent the past few years doing only stealth work and being rather sedentary. 
- so there’ll be lotsa old man!ash jokes like them poking fun at him whenever he complains about his back hehe
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- when they finally emerge outside they find themselves in the middle of nowhere! they then hijack a passing pickup truck and do a roadtrip back to civilisation. ROAD TRIP FTW
- at this point, quite some time has already passed and ash even has a fuzzy beard and mane and all. he’s standing at the back of the truck with a small smile on his face and the wind blowing in his hair, thinking GONNA GO BACK AND SEE EIJI, MISS HIM LOADS, HELL YEA 
- (bonus: this song and this scene is the catalyst for this entire headcanon btw)
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(drew this about a year ago. i was trying to imitate the manga’s art style... and the ash i had in my mind was a little different. i’m too lazy to redraw, but he’s fuzzier now okay! MORE FUZZ! like an actual freakin LION!)
- meanwhile, eiji and max will get into some deep shit around this point? 
- eiji in the pic above was me imagining that the Bad Guys had tossed some damning evidence (eg. severed body part?) on the ground like “ash’s dead/ash’s in a lot of danger now so hand over all the info u have”
- and eiji and max are like. SHOOKETH
- this would be the 3rd time ash has “died” after all, and as they say... 3rd time's the charm...
- eiji almost gives in, but then max spits in their face like fuck no and then... yeah. they get beat up and taken away or something lol
- EDIT: hmm... what if the Bad Guy is someone IN the government, and he uses his power to get eiji and max arrested for aiding and abetting a wanted fugitive (ash). and then ash has to rescue them... JAILBREAK STYLE
- also it might be cool to introduce ash's mom somewhere in this story... maybe SHE'S the villain! mwahaha *drama intensifies*
- anyways they will get saved by ash and gang bc that’s just the way things go, BUT! only on the condition they already made it out at least 80% of the way bc GODDAMN IT👏LET👏EIJI👏BE👏BADASS👏FOR👏ONCE👏 
- (that is, after he overcomes the initial shock of ash possibly being dead again... again...... again............)
- there will ofc be moments of “oh my god, you’re okay” "i thought i lost you...!"
- something like this, because one can never have enough cheesy reunion scenes
- this will eventually lead to REVELATIONS (of the romantic kind, yes) 
- buuuut they will never say "i love you" directly to each other bc ash is too emotionally constipated and eiji is too japanese. it's okay, they will communicate it through heated stares 👀
- i would love for there to be a scene where they have to be separated again for Plot Reasons and ash sorta hesitantly goes all "...will you wait for me?" as a direct parallel to canon!eiji's "i'll be waiting" and it’s like,
- FINALLY! 
- FINALLY!!!!!!!!!! ash has finally allowed himself to ask for this, to let himself want it! 
- and eiji would be like OF COURSE I WILL YOU BIG DUMMY, ALWAYS AND FOREVER
- but i think it'd be hilarious if eiji pops up while ash's in the middle of the final showdown and ash's like WTF I TOLD YOU TO WAIT FOR ME and eiji's like I WAS WORRIED OKAY YOU WERE TAKING SO LONG
- idk how this is supposed to end...
- oh wait! since the plot is government-related, maybe Someone will be able to pull strings to wipe out ash’s criminal record (past and present) and give him a brand new 100% legal identity, as thanks for his efforts? or maybe ash (or sing) just does it himself somewhere along the way LOL. anyway, he’ll be able to start over with a fresh clean slate and finally work on recovery FOR REAL NOW. yes this is a happy ending AND it didn’t require him to go to japan /flips off canon
- ...i realise it’s never going to be that simple but W H A T E V E R
- (also they probably will visit japan in the future with that shiny new passport... gotta meet the in-laws and all y’know)
- who do i gotta pay to write this cheesy self-indulgent fic for me
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icedthoma · 5 years ago
Text
for the dancing and the dreaming
-- hii! can I request a todoroki x f!ballerina!reader where one night he catches her dancing and he's surprised because she's always been kinda hardcore and loud and just not graceful at all? 😂 if you can't though that's totally fine 💕
Pairing: Todoroki Shouto x Reader
Notes: Of course! Hope you enjoy~
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“Hey, can you grab some snacks from the kitchen?” 
“Why me?” you protested, slamming your cards face down on the floor where you sat in Mina’s room. “You’re the one that’s been eating all the chips--”
“Get some ice cream while you’re at it,” Kaminari added, scrambling out of your range of attack with a snicker. 
“I’ll kill you,” you seethed, drawing a line across your neck as you stood up. “Just you wait until I’m up against all of you in a sparring match.” 
“Hey, I’ll come with y--” Todoroki began, but you waved him off. 
“I’m fine. Besides, someone has to watch my cards.” You glared pointedly at Sero, who was seated in the spot beside you despite his protests that he wasn’t a cheater. “Since some of us are too lazy to make a simple trip down the stairs.”
“Chocolate ice cream sounds great, thank you!” 
Growling, you stood up, almost tripping over the many blankets and random pillows strewn all across your friend’s room on your way to the door, closing it loudly behind you. As you trudged down the stairs to the kitchens, you sighed and rubbed your temples in an attempt to clear your head. Sure, you knew that they knew you weren’t really mad at them, but it was still annoying.  
Jumping off the fourth step from the bottom, you spun on the wooden floor upon landing, your sock-covered feet making it easy to slide around. You continued to the kitchens in this manner, your body moving to an invisible beat as you danced over to the closet that held all the snacks. Leaning down to snatch a few bags of chips, you raised a leg straight up behind you as your upper half dipped downward, grabbing the snacks and raising your torso back up again so you held an arabesque for a few seconds. 
It felt good to dance again, to use your skills you had practiced since childhood for something as simple as making a trip to the kitchen more interesting. As you had grown older, your dancing agility had become a weapon, the way you were able to fluidly evade and execute attacks the unfortunate downfall for your opponents. 
Twirling around, you tossed the bags onto a nearby counter and spun into a small pirouette, turning one or two times with your arms held neatly in front of you before slowly extending your leg back to rest the tips of your toes on the floor. 
Ah...the ice cream. 
Snapped out of your dancing reverie, you sighed and turned towards the refrigerator where the extra stash of ice cream was hidden. 
“That was amazing.” 
You slightly tensed up at the sudden interruption, your gaze finding a familiar brown and blue-eyed stare over by the entrance to the kitchen. 
“How--how long have you been there?” you yelled, pointing an accusing finger at Todoroki to cover up your surprise that you had been caught in the middle of dancing. “You should have said something sooner!” 
“I didn’t want to interrupt you,” he said, walking over to you and taking one of the chip bags in his hands. “And...I didn’t know you danced.” 
“None of you were supposed to know.”
“Not even your own boyfriend?” 
“Are you going to make fun of me?” you countered, ready for a remark to be thrown your way such as, “I didn’t think a loud person like you would do ballet.” “It doesn’t seem like your personality at all.” or your personal least favorite, “You’re not graceful at all, why are you even doing something like ballet?” 
“I think it suits you,” was what he said. 
You blinked in surprise, all your doubts being washed away in an instant. “You do?”
Todoroki nodded. “I mean, you fight so smoothly, like water. It makes sense that you would have done something like dance to train your movements.” 
“You don’t think that I’m too...loud, or clumsy, or whatever?”
“What would that have to do with you learning ballet?” Shouto asked, tone genuinely curious. “I don’t think you’re clumsy at all. And the way you were moving earlier, it was so...so graceful.” 
Unable to stop the growing grin spreading across your face, you stepped forward and threw your arms around his neck, the snacks hurriedly discarded from his hands onto the table. “Thank you,” you said, the fact that he didn’t seem to question at all how someone as generally loud as you did this kind of dance bringing so much comfort to you. 
“Though--though I am kind of sad you thought I would judge you about this,” he coughed once he had gotten used to your tight embrace, his palms sliding up your back to rest around your shoulder blades. 
“Yeah, I’m sorry,” you sighed, burying your face deeper into his shoulder as the two of you held each other in the middle of the dimly lit kitchen. “But you have to admit I don’t seem like the type to do ballet. I mean, I almost tripped on my way out the door earlier.” 
Shouto laughed quietly, and you could feel the sound in his chest passing into you and resonating in your heart. “I mean, we all fall sometimes, don’t we? I know I sure did.” 
You bit back the urge to make a snarky comment about his cheesy choice of dialogue. After all, you were in too good a mood to ruin the moment by being salty. 
Suddenly, Shouto’s hand moved to rest on the small of your back, and his other gently took yours, his thumb brushing over the back of your hand for a second. Tilting your head from where you were leaning on his shoulder, you blinked in surprise. 
“Are you initiating a slow dance?”
“I...I can’t dance as well as you can.” 
You laughed at how adorable he looked as he said that, all flustered and embarrassed. Picking your head off his shoulder, the two of you danced around the kitchen, you occasionally leading when Todoroki seemed to lose the unspoken beat the two of you were dancing to. 
It was different, dancing with him. It wasn’t that you didn’t enjoy dancing alone; that was certainly not the case. 
But there was something special about sharing the calmness and peace of mind dancing brought you with someone else that made you fall in love with the art all over again. 
“What’s on your mind?”
“I’m thinking...I want to dance with you more often.”
���Hmm. Maybe we can integrate it into a special attack move.”
“Are you serious?”
“I don’t know,” he said with a contagious chuckle that soon had you laughing, too. “Are you going to tell the others?” 
“Eventually,” you relented, resting your head on his chest once more and letting him take the lead. “And their snacks can wait, if that’s what you’re going to ask next.”
“I was going to ask if you wanted to go back so we could finish the game of UNO with the others.”
“Hold up!” you shouted, jumping away from his warm embrace, the romantic moment between the two of you giving way to your competitive spirit. “You were supposed to watch my cards!” 
“Sorry?”
“Shouto, I was this close to getting an Uno! Kaminari will definitely have looked at my cards, that cheating son of a--” 
“So I guess that’s a yes, then?”
You sighed. “Get the ice cream.”
“Okay.” 
“Oh, and one more thing.”
“Yes?”
“Make it vanilla.” 
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