#but um you know... its whatever
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sometimes you just have to get really. really high and cry about the concept of love
#.txt#drugs tw#idk.#dedicating yourself to someone and wanting to spend your days with them#no matter what.#no matter the circumstances#its very sweet <3#but um you know... its whatever
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ive come to realise that i dont actually hate kubokai, i just hate the way people write them
#sorry i read like two cute in character kubokai fics and im enjoying it now#theyre cute and im a closeted shun kinnie so. obviously i will ship him with my crush from the show.#i just really really REALLY hate the super cliche seme uke dynamic people usually give them#those people have NEVER watched the show.. my boy shun is NOT like that#its sooo stereotypical and they obviously give shun the role of 'the girl' in the relationship which is. um. ew#'shun is so fragile and innocent and uwu and he needs big strong aren around at all times to coddle him'#'and aren has a soft spot for shun and shun only and only shun can stop him from being totally murderous and dumb'#do yall know that one scene from the kissing booth#where elle is like 'NOAH! LOOK AT ME! THIS ISNT YOU! LOOK AT ME' when hes about to beat the shit outta his brother#thats how kubokai gets written usually#'aren pwease nevew fight again🥺pwease? fow me?'#me reading anything kaido says in most fics: HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT#sorry#people can write whatever they want its just. so ooc.#canon them is soooo bromance core#im sorry idk why im posting negative shit again when i like JUST said i wasnt going to do this anymore LMAO#not a callout post about anyone on here obvi- actually reading more recent fics from people on here is whats gotten me more into them#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#kuboyasu aren#kaido shun#kubokai#meows post
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Come back home when you have some sense
You can throw your life away just not at my expense
You’re not the son I raised
#jhariah#this one just rawrrfrrr#and then uh another line thats like ‘tell me did you raise a man?’#nice#im just listening to the new album to cope with nasty sickness and feeling out of it#god this album is really good it has every emotion in there like this song for example just the part where they scream the chorus its like#hnnnghhh#hm some other moments from the album im liking a lot uhhh i love re: concerns a lot#the part where hes like reading off the complaints and then the part where hes just screaming and its like BAM BAM BAM BAAAM#sasuke is so good and the bit at the end where its like ‘i just want you to know im so so...’#like hes gonna say sorry but cant seem to say the word for whatever reason and i know nothing about sasuke#but i has to imagine the fan girlies are eating gravel over that one lol it gets me#and theres just that like spooky echoing afterwards#the intro to fire4fun goes SOOOOOOOO hard i was losing my shit its awesome#the entirety of trust ceremony is giving me big feelings but specifically that part towards the end where its all quiet and you hear#its like whistling i think? like a marching band is coming in maybe#but it also kinda sounds like nature too and idk i like got a little bit um magical at that part cuz i was driving down a big hill#and it had been raining but there was a clearing in the clouds and the sun was bright and like at this particular hill#you can just see everything like the land stretches for miles theres trees hills the river farms all that shit#and idk with the extreme stress and depression ive been feeling its hard to have these moments where life seems worth it#and its hard to really feel anything anymore or to feel in the moment but idk i was just going down that hill seeing everything and it was#very majestic so yeah that song is definitely gonna have the same effect as pin eye for me#which i must mention pin eye again its still OOOOGHH very good it came at a pretty good time for me#yeah basically this album is uhhhh whats keeping me somewhat grounded rn i recommend 👍
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#my art#arcaea#insight#compassion#Um should i start putting arcaea as their last name LMFAO#… i’ll add it to all the character tags when i open tumblr on laptop…#anyways expect this shit to be ooc when update drops tomorrow! orr like 17ish hours for me#at the time of posting#but uhhh#its like skg throws herself into loving miracles (which finding true miracles was her real conviction)#and loving other worlds and creations in general#to not focus on the fact she isnt receiving any love back (and the last time Ever was from compassion who she left behind with that world)#and like by throwing herself i mean she goes completely bonkers Freak territory in loving#girl what if the real miracle was compassion’s hand hmm#jkjk#in the first pic look at that fool focused on whatever cube she made instead of compassion looking right at her come on man#i wonder at what point skg began to feel unsettled#im so intrigued by that little bit of her story#HOORAY FOR LORE PLEASE L0W1RO THROW ME GOOD CRUMBS#also yeah it starts off one sided between them (compassion -> skg)#f for compassion guys she could Not get skg to stay#im not entirely sure why for this next bit#but i think compassion has some slight cheeky vibes#more of a front when she’s older .whatever countless years is#so like. ‘found you!’ is said like hide n seek game#(how would skg confront her anyway knowing that she left her behind)#oh and compassion was taller when they were young but for some reason skg just shot up in height lololol#yeah sorry mess of tags Guys i really need arcaea update NOW
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Trying to. Clean up testament’s quotes page. Someone added old translations of their xx voice lines a while ago but some of them are pretty off. Trying to replace some of them with a more recent translation vid but im. Encountering a fun problem where some of these lines DO have official translations in strive, but theyre. Phrased a lot nicer than i feel they should be in xx. So im kind of combining the 2 translations i guess. Its hard to not feel like im going to be killed for this
#xx translation video translating 溺れる to ‘drown’ vs strive translating it to ‘sink softly’. um#their strive win quote ‘do try to learn your limits’. well the video goes with ‘you should know your place’#which isnt literally what they say but well its the vibe. less literal translations kind of hurt me but. ugh eurgh eeeeckckk#its hot ill leave it whatever thank you youtube user rednecked crake i dont want to change these too much 😭#im kinda familiar with their voice lines just from looking into them but still. im not a translator. just crazy.#the kat goes meow
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my attempt at lily versions
#wolfgang amadeus mozart#antonio salieri#fate grand order#fgo#my art#ok listen i know literally no one besides me cares about how these are two different centuries#but you see salieri's thing with this to last ish century suits makes putting him in a 18th century clothes looking weird#i figure that 19th is a good middle ground and plus he like. died in that century anyway so close enough#well actually im not sure when that style of coat became a thing. the outer one i mean but whatever#also they still had knee ish length in 19th century but the visual connection with modernish suits also makes it looking weird on him but#but! the longer boots make a similar shape to it and#um anyway#amade is eepy cuz um idk he writes about being tired lmao#<-- the most normal fan of these guys#did a very normal amount of reading on them. also this might be bringing out my mild interest in historical clothes just a little bit#well its not like i *have to* put them in historical clothes its not like this gacha game is very historical...#bwa wrong i do have to and the reason is brainrot
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I can't remember who said this but there was this one dev who said that when making romanceable characters they have to be attractive in some way (personality, looks, not too morally fucked up etc). and since I read that, the statement hasn't left my mind and I'm very aware now of whenever outside influence and modern discourse get to me or other writers. like just yesterday I found myself rewriting a scene to be more "comfortable" to witness, even though the point was to be emotionally charged and face a difficult topic the character had been actively lying about. but some things can't be glossed over. sometimes it's good when media grabs you by the shoulders and makes you face horrible shit. it's good when media makes you uncomfortable even if it's coming from a ~romanceable companion~. that means it's working. if you remain comfortable forever you learn nothing.
I bring this up bc the veilguard companions are the perfect example and victims of the "romanceable characters need to be attractive" mindset. they don't have ugly sides, they don't fight with each other--and I mean really fight--they don't have controversial opinions or do problematic things. they don't ever question your authority over their lives and why you're the guy in charge. they are nice and perfect and their problems aren't really that serious and can be fixed by simply having a therapy session w rook (bc being possessed or gaining new magic isn't a big deal in a world where previously such events are Very distressing and hard to control). they are further proof that trying too hard to make something attractive has the complete opposite effect if your brain isn't the size of a pebble.
it's overall very frustrating that big game developers continue to be so spineless and I'm not giving anyone a pass for shallow writing, especially from a franchise that is known to have complex characters. none of this is impressive after the first three dragon age games, which were well loved and dissected and debated for years after their release. that isn't to say these games don't have kind characters, having that balance is why I personally like dark fantasy and liked what the dragon age games offered (whenever the writing was good..). it's not dark for the sake of being dark (see grimdark), there's a reason why these things are happening, and in this world no one is completely innocent even if they have good intentions. most people like when their characters aren't always kind or agreeable, bc it's extremely rewarding to finally find that middle ground (of course I have to bring up larian, who made bg3 and proved just how much people appreciate flawed characters, see astarion). conflict is the driving force of a story, no matter what it is. even the most sickeningly sweet cozy slice of life story will have some kind of conflict. it's unavoidable. that's life. taking that away is setting yourself up for failure and all that remains is a boring story full of boring people. no one cares about characters who have their lives together.
(the post is technically over but I wanted to put some final thoughts under the cut bc this got longer than I meant)
I want to go back to the statement real quick... like i do agree, it's true as writers we'll subconsciously (or consciously if you're insecure) try to make our characters appealing, but this is the common trap writers fall into by giving a shit about what others think and want from Their work (which btw I fully believe in writing what you want even if it's "bad" because something with genuine soul will never be as bad as soulless cashgrabs). romanceable characters can and should be as flawed as you'd make any other character, bc trust me there's an audience for everything. even a random npc with two lines will be attractive to someone.
the pressure of an imaginary audience is what pushes writers into a corner and prevents writers from writing and exploring what They want. it's the writer's story first, not the audience's. I think the romanceable companion trap can be easily avoided if writers just 1) grow a bit of a backbone and 2) ask themselves if this is even a necessary or insightful mechanic that will help develop a character further. ask themselves if this character even has the capacity to handle a romantic relationship bc everything else is subjective and it's impossible to appeal to everyone (which apparently this is a controversial take). I won't sit here and pretend that I don't appreciate a good romance, but sometimes all someone really needs is a friend.
obsidian is a good example of self aware devs. they tried to do romance for pillars of eternity 2 bc of fan demand, and it didn't work very well. now for avowed, they didn't explore romance bc they know it's not their strong suit and don't feel it's necessary for this story, instead that time and effort went to developing the characters in other meaningful ways. I have nothing but respect for such a decision bc they know what they want from their story instead of lying and trying to be everything at once. less is more as they say.
#this was supposed to be a small post but . yk how it is#wrote this instead of working on my stupid art projects i am about to walk into the woods and never return i hate college#anyway. enjoy my rambling there's a point in there somewhere probably#nothing against the dev who said that btw i thought it was interesting for them to say since it is true#its hard to not think about the potential audience when creating something but we have to try to ignore them#i think i wanted to say more but whatever this generally covers my thoughts#and i know everything is subjective maybe people Do want their romanceable characters to be attractive and unproblematic#good for you. there's genres for that. but in a dark fantasy setting? some things just don't work like that. genres exist for a reason#i want my companions to be messy mfs not pretty perfect angels#also☝️dont be stupid i don't condone writers having personal agendas and writing hateful things#thats a completely different thing and obviously not what i meant#a writer should always be a neutral observer of their work. nothing else.#bioware critical#six speaks#oh also again... nothing wrong with um 'normal' and kind characters. but when everyone is like that it gets boring. variety ok
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can we . stop making commenting on people’s weights. like just in general please
#because why is the first thing you say to me is ‘you lost weight!!!!’#like oh lol woaw I totally didn’t notice thanks#like idk its backhanded but not at the same time you know?#because why are you assuming my weight loss is good? why do you assume it’s something to celebrate?#what if I wasn’t intendending on losing weight? comments like this can so easily spark repressed disordered mindsets in people#like it makes me sound like a whiny sensitive bitch but this shit fucked me Up lol#fuck you I was just as pretty and funny and cool thirty pounds ago#and fuck you for acting like it’s sooooo much better I got rid of it#delete later#lol#sorry Im actually tweaking so bad#I’ve been tweaking silently all of today and that one comment just . god it fucked me upp lolllll#couldn’t stop thinking abt it um!#anyways whatever if you read this far into my nonsensical mumblings I love you and hope you’re kind to yourself#tw disordered thoughts#tw ed
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Today on Pop Culture Addressed By Ancient Theologians: Does Free Guy synthesize the tension between will and intellect as the vehicles of ultimate human bliss as seen in Thomistic medieval theology?
#I’m Tired so my thoughts are jumbled but if the Franciscans were like the will ie act of love is the ultimate experience of happiness and#Aquinas was like um actually to will something means something is unfulfilled ie wanting and that’s not perfect#but perfect knowledge can be perfect because people want it for itself therefore intellect gives us happiness in contemplating God#yeah#does free Guy resolve that tension in its world view by going#freedom to choose is only present where love is present as the lens by which we see the world?#wait idk but like#Jody and the parallel world of Guy attain happiness not only when they will for love’s sake but when they see love#like there has to be the willing and eternal/constant/continual humming yes! of the will and the intellectual Knowing/Seeing the Love#idk too big for me#whatever else this is teaching me I’m naturally inclined toward the Franciscans#pov#like I get what St Thomas is saying and he definitely is making points but I’m like nerd. where is the love#and it is there of course but he gets so caught up in the understanding cause he likes to understand! that IS how he loves!#but im like if you haven’t used the word love at least 99 times in your principle statement what even are you#sgjhdsgovc#anyway the answer is it’s both and you can’t split the hairs too fine#but only to understand how they fit together#love is willing (yes!) and seeing (also saying yes!)#so when Pieper was like love is saying it’s good that you exist#it’s the assent to (with the will) and the seeing of (with the intellect)#idk processing processing lots of thoughts
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New school attendance rules (that are stupid as fuck) being published has me learning people didn't even know that the UK fines people for their kids not being in school unauthorized???
#i...i....yeah to anyone who didnt know#we do#this country is obsessed with school attendance#if its not authorized your fucked#hell even if authorized aka your carer did phone for you and shit#depending how many you have it can stack up and they'll get sus#and you'll get in trouble even then#like the new rules alone are increasingly making it clear if your not authorized you can get bankrupt depending how many kids you have#which yes makes the new rules abelist as fuck and also only rich people will survive it#hell if the schools cant fine you they'll at least make you feel shame#as my school had a form system where at the end of each term a form will be rewarded for the best attendance#so rip if you were the fucker that took i dunno one or two days off for sickness or whatever#because you just costed your form room the award and the classmates know it and will look at you#source: me who had to take sick days off#hell snow days you wont free at my school#my roads and pathways were iced so i couldnt go in#but noooo according to my head of year i should have tried cause he hunted all of us who took the day off and interograted us#and if our excuse wasnt good enough for him we were told off#and they'd literally encourage you to only take sick day off if your throwing up#my head of year literally said he dont care if we got a headache or small cough or sniffle just come in#...huh wonder how they did during 2020...#but yeah attendance in the UK in terms of schools is fucking strict#(also if your curious they did send us home if we were bad-bad#i got sent home once i think??? i dont recall much of that school for my own sanity#but i badly burnt my hand in DT via a soldering iron and i had to go home and the doctors and return to school#with a hand i couldnt write with which was my writing hand so um#yeah i couldnt work much until it recovered...well my english teacher forced me to write with my non-writing hand but#and one girl got sent home for throwing up on the stairs#and another from my limited memories for falling down the stairs which uh were stone in a way so um#(i fell up those stairs somehow once...didnt get sent home but i missed english so) they had no choices sometimes)
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You know when you think about it…purple wedding is just a synonym for lavender marriage...hmmmmmmm
#.txt#4 all the gay joffrey thruthers out there#not me bc i think its kind of funny if he's genuinely into marg. meanwhile she's exploding him with her mind#that's my hc for him. whatever's funniest at any given momenet#actually wait no. I think she doesn’t like him but she DOES like the idea of having a wattpad romance where she fixes a bad boy#just to see if she could do it you know#if she actually did manage to fix him she’d be like. oh. um. I didn't think I'd get this far lol. I still dont like u tho so. bye 👋#and he’d be like fuck you mean bye divorce hasn’t been invented yet 🤨 and then he’d die under mysterious circumstances ❤
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ok after listening to the english version of the death note musical....... unpopular opinion i think but i actually prefer the japanese version? dont get me wrong, with some of the songs i do think i might like the eng version more but..... idk i like the lyrics of the japanese version a lot more? and obviously i only know them via a translation but i know for a fact that the entire focus of certain songs are different between versions.
like in the english version of the game begins, L is talking about his strategy to track down kira. but in the japanese version, he's more so talking TO kira directly and saying that he's going to take him down from his "god" status to hell. or mortals and fools, which had a wholeee different vibe in the japanese version being called like a cruel dream. and uhhhh am i insane or was rem's song before she dies an entirely different song? cause in english it was like a sort of generic love song that was pretty chill considering the context, while in the japanese version it was this superrr melancholic and striking ballad she sang while floating around misa.
idk but i really do think i prefer the japanese version. but the og english version is good too!!! i really liked hurricane and the way it ends in particular
#in ''the way it ends'' btw light saying to L ''i've always stayed a step ahead; but you were with me all the way'' almost made me cry WHATTT#WHO MADE HIM FUCKING SAY THATTTTT THATS SUCH AN INSANE LYRIC#but anyway yeah i think i prefer the jp version a good amount#another thing was um. and this might be a stupid thing to be weird about but. L's actor was too passionate for my tastes#<- that sounds insane but if you know anime L you know what i mean right. like hes pretty reserved#and i felt in the japanese production i watched L's actor there was still a great performer and singer like putting work into those songs#while still keeping that air of L being more reserved and like. flat almost? i feel like the guy playing L in the eng version was too much#like ''im BELTTTINGGGGGG HOW IM GONNA FUCKING CATCCHHHH KIRA!!!!!!!!!!'' like bro calm down......#ITS A GOOD PERFORMANCE it just doesnt read as L to me. and like thats fine whatever its an adaptation#but also in the japanese version they still did that adaptation while making L feel more like himself. so idk man#but anyway I WANNA SEE THIS NEW LONDON PRODUCTION SOOOOOOOO BAD#IVE SEEN PHOTOS AND IT LOOKS SO GOOD THE SET IS SOOOOOO COOL LOOKING OML#i need to see this musical live at SOME point in my life. pleaseeee can we get a north america production after this#serena.txt#death note posting
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in other news that I can't really talk about on the personal twt page because politics: I am now one of the founding members of the rebirth of an activist-student-journalist organization here where I live In the ph! and I love it! I just fucking hate the fact that the said rebirth all started because someone asked an ex-kinda-situationship to fucking talk to me about it after months of silence-
#to those in the ph that know the college journalism scene and figured out what region i live in - itll be obvious on as to what org it is#but um yea the moral of the story is that if you are involved in ndmos please don't ever fucking date anyone in them#because The World Is Small And The NDMO Student Sphere is Quite Smaller S#So Interaction With Exes Of Any Kind Are Unavoidable And Fucking Expected If Ya Wanna Grow The Movement#so like yea whatever connection we both share has both benefited both of our activism and student leadership initiatives greatly#both before during and after the whole thing#and the rebirth of the organization is proof of that! and im glad that they reached out to me for help on this end because ultimately#this is needed!#bUT DOES THAT MEAN I'M NOT BITTER NOOOPE im still bitchy about it but i in a crucial org position and rep cANT SAY THAT#so tgats why this tumblr account exists its basically an archive of shit I Cant Say On Twitter For Political Reasons#anyways wooo im excited for the relaunching of this org and for the student activist movement jn this region to actually BE SOMETHING#because like it really has been disorganized for so long#and we'll be having our first meeting on friday!#so yay!#not so yay on the fact of interacting with said ex sapphic situationship but well what can ya fuckin do she's an activist too#personal shit
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another doodle :3 mtt clothing swap!
DUST STOP SERVING WITH HORROR AND TAKE YOUR DEAD ASS BROTHERS SCARF OFF KILLER HES ABOUT TO HAVE A MOVIE REALISTIC PANIC ATTACK
#this is what bad sanses is to me#horrordust having the time of their lives and then the world + nightmare being out for killer#no because why do they look good in each others clothes. actually why did i ask theyre mtt OF COURSE they look good in eachothers clothes#i cant tell im just biased or not but dust doesnt look that bald without the hood the way i drew him#he looks FAR too similar to classic in my style though its unnerving. ive been noticing that recently its scary#change the colors on him thats classic. thats sans undertale#killer a PAPYRUS behind you 💙#hold up wait hold on??? DUST outfit killer... HORROR outfit dust... KILLER outfit horror........#that order of swaps is just like a certain other trio of mine. i wonder who. huh#swapinverse reference (only i understand because i have not told much about swapinverse to anyone)#triglycercule when will you stop talking about swapinverse when nobody knows about it and actually start swapinverse posting!!!!!#never (when i finish the full doc including character details and actual multiverse lore)#which will likely be in like 2027 or something idk man im a slow worker#slow in working and physical activity too ��💔💔 triglycercule what can you not not do?#i can be unnecessarily into 3 freaks who dont even know eachother and put them into every situation together#truely comedic. thank you i know. i am truly a comic. call me the muse of comedy. call me....... thalia (gets shot)#ANOTHER swapinverse reference???? WE CANNOT LET BRO GET AWAY WITH THIS ‼️‼️‼️‼️#was gonna say bruh but then i realized i would sound too much like epic and um#listen epic i like you but id rather shoot myself than speak like you bruh#yet another doodle where killer is the butt of the joke. at least its not like 90% of other jokes like this#where killer either gets the shit beaten out of him or he gets yelled at or someone gets angry at him#i dont have the right to criticize the majority of the fandom's humor ill silence myself#tricule art#THIS one goes in tricule art because its digital and not traditional. i know thats medium discrimination. i dont care#can you believe i only drew this during a 5 hour flight. seriously. 5 HOURS 4 ONLY THIS?????#whatever at least ive been drawing. bare minimum is best minimum#as long as i keep draw...... eventually ill improve....... its literally impossible if i dont improve if i dont keep drawing#imGONNA improve soon trust (when will it happne 😞😞😞☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️)
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im gonna answer the other ask later but TRANSFEM SCARY I WAS. ALSO THINKING HBBBGNN
#willy goes both ways abt such things bcus. one he is a misogynist and a homophobe or at least was on earth. obviously#and he still holds you know that. hypermasculine toxic mindset as of s1 based on the uhhh#“overly feminine namby pamby” whatever he says#(kicking myself for not having it memorized)#but i assume that he encountered more variable things in the forgotten realms that may have made him more normal abt. gender variance there#god okay i. hes not. he has an opinion of “you can be a freak if you want whatever. ill play pretend with you. ill tolerate it.”#i really like transmasc ron for similar reasons.. of.... especially when they meet in the cabin where hes cooking fish#and willys like “thats right get some bass in your voice boy !!”#like i know its just regular like. ron isnt masculine enough. but it reads very sarcastic....#“get some bass in your voice” like . you wanna be a boy so bad okay. ill humor you. hahahah. man up then.#um but transfem scary i like a similar. thing. of.... tolerating her being a girl and playing along but always being.#kind of chiding about it.#im so worried were not on the same pagw#which is fine obviously but i get so shy abt when. someone offers me headcanons that i dont agree with and i have to be like#“hahaha yeah whatever you say” like i cant say anything back cus its Wrong to me. BUT.#god though yeah her. visibly being hard around him & its both deeply sort of gross but very flattering to him like. i can work with this...#i think of him as a. opportunist. hes not into cock & not into kids really. dwindling upwards of teen girls but eh.#so when a cute troubled teen girl is literally. offering herself up to you at your feet man its like. why would i say no !! ♡#hes more into taking advantage of her than any of her personal details you know. like her as a person doesnt really. matter. who cares#shes available and stupid and looking to him for advice and validation.#sorry again i havent LISTENED TO ANY OF THIS. I CAN BE WRONG#didnt anthony make the joke abt willy not being brave enough to try pegging. maybe this is his chance#who said that. who. said that#you really want to manipulate a teen girl then you humble yourself and suck her cock and shes yours forever.#im crazy. im crazy#.dxt#scary
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and what to do when one coworker complains about another never doing any work despite the fact that they, too, never seem to be doing any work? to kill them both, or to not...
#its just interesting. the interpersonal politics of the workplace.#like um. i know you dont go the bar but that definitely does not mean you cant be on the floor.#clear some fucking tables maybe instead of prepping something that has Already Been Prepped like. an Hour Ago.#sigh<3 whatever#i am able to live laugh love through it. because at the end of the day... who care ❤
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