#but um yeah he's going to be in costume so. like. kind of in character a bit i guess if he jokes or whatever??? maybe????

[trashmuis]

God, thinking about it some more... when i meet bill moseley... i'm going to want to look cute for a photo and bc it helps with my confidence so maybe i wont be so nervous (bc of course im nervous meeting anyone i respect irl) and then i consider it and like... im gonna be in a nice outfit and put on makeup and stuff, trying to look good... for motherfucking CHOP TOP

IMAGINE TRYING TO LOOK GOOD FOR GODDAMN CHOP TOP

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

The Best Friend Showdown

Season four had many, many flaws. One of the big ones was the Rena Rouge vs Chat Noir conflict where Ladybug starts relying on Alya more and more, basically using her to replace Master Fu. We get a sense that Chat Noir feels inferior to Rena Rouge because of this change, but it’s never directly addressed. The most we get is this conversation from Hack-San:

Ladybug: I'm really sorry, Cat Noir. I should've told you. I mean, if I found out that you told someone about your secret identity, I'd... probably be upset, too. I'm really sorry I hurt your feelings. Cat Noir: You didn't hurt my feelings. You did everything right. 

Which is actually a really weird bit of dialogue because - as far as I can tell - nothing in the episode revealed that Scarabella knew Ladybug's identity. She hands out miraculous all the time and no one knows who she really is. Why would this time be different? Ladybug could just show up in costume, explain what's up, and then hand off the earrings while using yet another miraculous.

Anyway, the Rena Rouge vs Chat Noir conflict is “resolved” by Rena Rouge being outed again (and I guess that matters this time), leading her to give up her miraculous so that Gabriel can’t steal it away, which of course leads Gabriel to steal it away and fully disempower Ladybug’s larger team, leaving Chat Noir her only teammate.

How satisfying! This is such good, character-driven story telling!

It’s not. This is plot contrivances to the max with no meaningful character beats, but we’re not here to talk about that. We’re here to do one of my favorite things: gush about a relevant Kim Possible episode! Today’s topic is episode 12 of season one: Pain King vs. Cleopatra, the episode that introduces Kim’s female BFF, Monique!

This was a bit of a shocker for me because I didn’t realize that Kim and Monique weren’t pre-series friends. Turns out that, much like Alya, Monique is a new girl, which isn’t a bad call. This was a nice way to delay Monique’s introduction for a few episodes so that the writers could focus on establishing Kim’s relationship with other key members of the cast like her partner, Ron. Spacing out your intros is the way to go whenever you can pull it off as it’s a kindness to your audience that keeps them from feeling overwhelmed, making it more likely that they’ll remember your cast.

The other, more important similarity between Alya and Monique is that, when Kim’s hero partner and life-long friend finds out about Monique, he is less than thrilled:

Kim: I barely got to see them. Right after I hooked up with Monique, the museum was robbed by some glowing-headed animal guy. Ron: Oh, that's nice. Ron: Wait a minute, who's Monique? Kim New friend, really great. Anyway, the thief stole an enchanted ancient talisman. Ron: Whoa, whoa, back up! How can I not know about a new friend? Kim: I met her at Club Banana, then again at the museum before I chased the glowing robber. Ron: So what's she like? Kim: The robber? Ron: The friend, Kim, the "new friend".

Throughout the episode, Kim and Monique continue to bond without Ron, leaving Ron feeling left out:

Ron: Seein' a pattern here, Rufus: Kim does her thing, I do my thing, and pretty soon - we're doing different things.

Which leads him to get a little territorial:

Kim Ron! What are you doing here? Ron: Can I dine with my best friend and her new friend? Kim: Uuh, Ron, Monique, and vice versa. Ron: Bearclaw? Monique: No, thanks, I'm vegetarian. Ron: Uhm, I'm pretty sure it's imitation bear? Kim: She's joking, Ron. Ron: Good one, hahaha, ha, good one. So, did Kim tell you that I'm her sidekick? Cause that role is definitely taken by me. Monique: Riiiight. Well, in... you know I better get to class. Later, Kim. Um, n-nice meeting you, Ron. Ron: Likewise, I'm sure! Kim: What is your problem? You're acting really weird. Ron: Well, let's see. You went to the museum with Monique, not me. Monique was with you this morning, not me. Hmm, pattern? Kim: Yeah. You. Weird. Ron: No, we're drifting apart because you're excluding me. Kim: I am not excluding you. It's just that you and Monique are... different.

Noticing some similarities to Miraculous here?

So how does Kim Possible resolve this conflict?

Well, the plot of this episode resolves around Kim Possible’s version of professional wrestling, the GWA. There’s a competition going on that Kim has no interest in watching (mood), but when Kim mentions the GWA to Monique:

Monique: Why didn't you bring [Ron] along? Kim: Unless someone put a waiter in a headlock, this is definitely not Ron's scene. Besides, he had a date with "Steel Toe". Monique: He scored tickets to Mayhem in Middleton? The GWA rocks! Kim: What?

It turns out that Monique and Ron have a shared interest! Multiple shared interests, in fact! Interests that Kim does not share:

Monique: You know, I still can't believe you met Pain King and Steel Toe. Ron: I can't believe you're into wrestling. Kim: I can't believe I know either one of you.

By the end of the episode, the conflict is resolved not with Kim having to pick a BFF or with Monique somehow being demoted, but by showing that this didn’t need to be a conflict at all. Kim can have multiple close friends that she shares different interests with without any of those friends being lesser. Those friends can, in turn, have their own friendships that don’t always involve her.

It’s a genuinely lovely resolution that makes me love this little friend group because it now has added complexity. Monique and Ron are friends in their own right! Kim is not the center of the universe in spite of her main character status!

I also love that Kim isn’t vilified for having other friends or portrayed as constantly leaving Ron out of things that he'd want to do in favor of Monique. Ron genuinely would not enjoy most of the things that the girls love to do together. At the same time, Ron’s feeling aren’t treated as totally irrational either and Kim even admits to ditching him. It’s a genuine, complex conflict that is super common when someone enters a new relationship be it platonic or romantic.

Obviously Kim Possible’s version of this conflict feels far less complex than Miraculous’ because Kim Possible understood that Ron should be Kim’s one-and-only partner, so his position was really never threatened. Monique does not want to be an action hero and is never given the sort narrative weight that elevates her to Ron’s level or higher, but that doesn't matter. The basic lesson here is still relevant and super important for the intended audience of both of these shows.

There did not need to be a Rena Rouge vs Chat Noir conflict that never got properly resolved. Miraculous could have made these two friends and no, Scarabella doesn't count because Chat Noir has no idea that Scarabella is Rena Rouge/Furtive. Their relationship ended at the end of Hack-San. He didn't even know that Rena Furtive was a thing until she was in the process of being benched and that's the problem.

Kim Possible is not a team show, Miraculous is, and yet Kim Possible has better team dynamics than Miraculous. Monique could have joined Kim's team at the end of Pain King vs. Cleopatra and it would have felt natural because both Kim and Ron had welcomed Monique and formed a genuine bond with her. This is a true friend group that Miraculous can only dream of even though they've been adding new superheroes since season two.

We're going into a season with a full, massive team and yet that team has no established dynamics on the hero side. It's not a functional team! None of these characters have meaningful relationships with each other as heroes save for Alya and Nino since they know each other’s secret identities. The only relationships Miraculous cares about are the various romances and everyone's relationship to Marinette and everyone suffers for it.

The show would not have been harmed by Rena Rouge, Chat Noir, and Ladybug being a team. It was the thing I kept think after watching the Kim Possible episode. Since the team is the end game, why aren't we seeing them? It would have been so nice to have Hack-San end with Ladybug introducing Chat Noir to Rena Furtive instead of a nonsense discussion about an issue the episode didn't even address.

[venus-haze]

Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf? (Foxy Coltrane x Reader)

Summary: It’s Halloween, 1985, and your Little Red Riding Hood costume catches the attention of the Midnight Wolfman himself.

Note: Female (incredibly unhinged) reader. Foxy calls the reader “Red” because of the Halloween costume, not due to any physical descriptors. I've literally been working on this since February🫠 Anyway, this is for all the old man fuckers out there🖤 Except if you’re under 18, terf or radfem, or post thinspo/ED content.

Word count: 2.2k

Warnings: Discussions of canon typical violence. Sexually explicit content involving semi-public play, oral sex (m. receiving) and light roleplaying elements.

October 31, 1985

As soon as you walked into the bar up the road from your place, you immediately wanted to walk out. Having no other plans for Halloween night, you figured you could make the best of going solo. Wore a cute little costume to see where the night led you. Somehow you ended up in a bar where no one else was dressed up for the holiday that called for it. At least, not to the extent you were. Sure, it was a mass-produced Little Red Riding Hood costume you bought on your way home from work, but you made it your own with some makeup and cute heels you dug out of your closet.

You trudged over to the bar, soon nursing your drink and your hurt feelings. With your lip pouted in a slight sulk, you looked around, hoping to catch someone’s attention. Just when it seemed like all hope was lost, a man approached. Dark eyes locked on you. Sly grin on his face. Older, handsome in a scruffy way that your friends always teased you for being into.

You craned your neck to look up at him from your barstool. He sure as hell had that going for him too.

“I dig your costume, Little Red.”

You smiled. “Thanks. Seems like I’m the only one here who got the memo that it’s Halloween.”

“Hell, Halloween is everyday for me,” he said.

“You got a name?”

“You can call me the Midnight Wolfman.” He threw his head back and bellowed out a howl.

Your eyes widened. Heart might’ve skipped a beat. 

Shouts and cheers punctuated the sound, a few of the bar patrons following his lead with weak howls of their own. 

He was probably crazy. Or drunk. Likely both. But fuck, why else would you have gone out on Halloween?

“Buy me a drink, Wolfman?” 

“Glad to, Red.” 

He sat down at the stool next to you, long legs splayed out as one of his boots rested between your heels on your footrest. He claimed your space so easily, you nearly forgot you’d only just met him.

Two shared shots of whiskey later, your face was warm as he leaned in to talk. His easy drawl lured you closer, knees touching, close enough that you could see yourself in his steel blue gaze. You nearly suggested finding a booth to squeeze into. 

Your mind raced with visions of him pulling you onto his lap, his big hands all over you, lips attached to your neck while the other bar patrons were none the wiser.

“Most people call me Foxy, though,” he said.

You furrowed your brows, hoping you hadn’t been fantasizing through too much of the conversation. “Foxy?”

“That’s my name. Winslow Foxworth Coltrane.”

“I like it. Sounds like an F. Scott Fitzgerald character or something.”

“Who’s that?”

“He wrote The Great Gatsby.”

“Oh yeah, I saw that one, had Redford in it. Kind of a snoozefest if you ask me. I mean, hard to follow up Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid,” he said. “What kind of movies are you into, Red?”

“I love horror, especially the gory shit,” you said before you could think twice. 

He grinned, giving you a nod of approval. “Right on.”

“My favorite is probably The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. Have you seen that one?”

“Yeah, it was great. Reminds me of my family.”

You laughed. “No kidding.”

His smile wavered, and for the first time all night it felt like you two weren’t on the same wavelength. Had you missed something in your half-drunk stupor? Was there something he mentioned that you fantasized through?

“Um, how about you?” you asked, trying to salvage the connection. “Westerns?”

“I’m into the classics, like those old monster movies.”

“Well, you’re way more handsome than Lon Chaney, Wolfman.”

“That’s ‘cause I’m the real deal, baby.”

“I believe it.”

“Yeah?”

You licked your lips. “With a howl like yours? Makes a girl think you could eat her alive.”

“C’mere,” he growled, pulling you to him. 

His lips were on yours, wild and passionate that would keep you up the rest of the night even if nothing else happened. The way he had his hands on you, though, bringing you closer to him, deepening the kiss so you could taste the whiskey on his tongue, the very same he bought you, made you certain he wanted the night to end exactly the same way you did.

He pawed at your ass, his hands pushing up your short, red, satin skirt until your panties peaked out. You moaned when his fingers brushed the wet spot on the fabric, pushing against your clit. Fuck the notion of a getting busy in a back booth, you were ready to let him take you up against the bar if you weren’t so rudely interrupted.

“Hey, c’mon,” the bartender said, looking equally disturbed and exasperated. “You guys can’t—”

Foxy slammed his palm onto the bar, nearby glasses rattling on impact. “Motherfucker, if you don’t get out of my girl’s face I’ll crack your skull open.”

A smile twitched across your lips.

“Get out before I call the cops. Both of you.”

Foxy stood up. “Think I’m scared of some fuckin’ pigs?” Grabbed a nearby beer bottle and smashed it against the bar. Before you could blink, the jagged edge was pressed against the bartender’s throat. If anyone noticed what was going on, they sure as hell weren’t trying to intervene. “By the time they get here I could gut you like a fish.” 

A delirious thrill rolled down your spine at the gleam in Foxy’s eyes. 

“Look man, you—you don’t even have to pay for the drinks. Just go, alright?”

Deathly silence fell over the altercation, the bartender glancing between Foxy’s wild face and the broken bottle.

Do it, a dark, repressed part of you, ravenous for blood, hissed.

Foxy laughed, shaking his head. “You’re a fuckin’ pussy, man.” He threw his arm around you, letting the broken bottle shatter on the floor as he led you out.

“Don’t come back!”

“I wouldn’t shit here if I ate a gas station hot dog, asshole,” he shouted over his shoulder.

You pulled your polyester cloak a little tighter when you walked outside. Damn, you and Foxy probably looked like one hell of a pair to the people just getting to the bar.

The two of you stood in the middle of the parking lot while he lit a cigarette. “I don’t eat gas station hot dogs if I can help it. Give me indigestion. My ol’ man—well, adopted ol’ man—he used to make a mean fried chicken at his gas station,” he said, taking a drag. “Get a hankering for the stuff sometimes, and KFC sure as hell doesn’t cut it. Guess Colonel Sanders’ get-up is better than dressing like a clown, though.”

You interjected his rambling, “You would’ve done it, wouldn’t you? The bartender—”

“Wouldn’t have been the first time.” He stared you down, a predatory gleam in his eyes. He took a long drag, smoke rolling from his lips and circling above his head as he asked, “You afraid of the big bad Wolfman, Red?”

“Terrified.”

“You don’t know the half of it.”

“Then show me.”

“Mine or yours?”

“Mine. Yours. I don’t know—I need you, Foxy.” Your voice neared a whine. 

“Fuck,” he groaned. “Say that again.”

“I need you.” You tugged on his shirt. “Foxy, c’mon.”

“Yours. I can’t drive at night for shit.”

You grabbed him by the arm, practically pulling him over to your car. 

Jamming the key into the lock, you couldn’t open the driver’s side door fast enough, quickly unlocking the passenger door for him. Your hands would’ve been shaking if you weren’t gripping the steering wheel within an inch of your life as you peeled out of the parking lot the moment he finished adjusting the seat, moving it as far back as it could go to accommodate his long legs. 

“Mind if I turn on the radio?” Foxy asked.

“Sure. I don’t live far, though. Should only be ten minutes.”

He fiddled with the stations until a late night news broadcast mentioned the name Otis Driftwood. He paused before sitting back.

“‘Free the Three’ demonstrations in support of the notorious Devil’s Rejects death cult continue well into the night.”

The reporter detailed the Fireflys’ crimes, as if anyone could have missed them. Hundreds of gruesome murders to their names. You, just like everyone else in America, had been glued to the story when it broke. All work practically came to a halt when their trials were going on, obvious guilty verdicts amidst a media circus.

“What do you think of ‘em?” Foxy asked, breaking the silence.

“The Fireflys?”

“Yeah.”

You glanced at him, tearing your eyes off the road for a moment to gauge how he’d react to your answer. “I guess what they did is fucked up, but the police and military have done way worse. Like, Otis Driftwood never dropped nukes on entire cities,” you said. “Why?”

“That’s my family.”

“Really?”

“Well, Otis is my half-brother. The rest of ‘em are all adopted.”

You looked at him again. Then the road. Then him in disbelief. “Then you—“

“Told you I was the real deal, sweetheart.”

“Why didn’t you get caught?”

“I was already in the can. Crazy how that shit happens, huh?”

You hit the gas, accelerating from 50 to 85 in a flash. No cops. Didn’t matter. Foxy could handle them if there were. You pressed your thighs together. Almost considered pulling over and just fucking in the backseat. But where was the fun in that? The excitement? The vulnerability of letting a killer into your home, where you’re supposed to be safe, and hoping to god he wouldn’t see your kitchen knives and get some bright ideas? You moaned. Oh god. You moaned.

“Red?”

“I know, Foxy. I’m going as fast as I can.” Your voice was whiny, high-pitched, desperate. “Piece of shit car—”

He grinned, shaking his head. “You’re nuts.”

“Is that a turn off?”

“Hell no.”

——

You nearly dropped your keys by the time you unlocked the door to your apartment, Foxy feeling you up from behind while you fumbled with them, obviously amused by your racing pulse and trembling hands.

“Cool place,” he said when he walked inside. “You got any roommates or—”

You pushed him against the front door, your mouth on his, desperate, hungry for anything he’d give you. Slipping your hand between your bodies, you cupped the bulge in his jeans. He groaned into your mouth, and you squeezed gently, feeling his cock strain against the rough denim.

“Don’t tease,” he growled.

“It’s only teasing if you don’t follow through.” You kneeled in front of him, moving to untie your cloak while he unbuckled his belt, unzipping his jeans.

“Wait,” he said, “leave the costume on.”

“Whatever you want, Wolfman.”

He pulled his cock from his boxers, big enough to be intimidating at first glance. But he was a killer, part of the Firefly clan, for god's sake, you wouldn't falter, instead mustering up the courage you had to even invite him home in the first place.

“My, what a big cock you have,” you teased, taking it in your hand, spreading the precum at his tip with your thumb while slowly pumping his length.

“All the better to fuck that pretty mouth with, Red.”

You licked your lips, holding eye contact with him as you took him in your mouth. Something primal about him, inherently dangerous. He’d killed people before, probably done far worse. Could change his mind at any time and cause you a world of hell. You pressed your thighs together, trying to ignore the ache in your core for hopes he’d take care of it if you did a good enough job. With the way he dug his fingers into your scalp, loud curses and praises falling from his mouth, you weren’t doing half bad.

“Midnight Wolfman’s got you right where he wants you, huh, Red? Turned you into his little bitch?” he taunted. “C’mon, gimme a howl.”

You whined around his cock, choking a bit when he thrust in your mouth. You liked this version of the story a hell of a lot better. No one to save you. Just you, in your Little Red Riding Hood costume, and the wolf, his crooked teeth bared as he hissed through them, grinning down at you. And you brought him there. Invited him into your home knowing he could tear you apart if he wanted to—maybe you wanted him to.

“You’re a good slut, ain’t you?” He groaned. His cock twitched in your mouth, you could feel the salty taste of him on your tongue as he came with a howl. “Take it all, Red—fuck, take it.” As if you had much of a choice but to swallow, but his praise went to your head, to your pussy. “Fuck, you’re like a dream come true.”

Pulling back, sitting on your heels, you looked up at him with a newfound predatory gleam in your eye as he caught his breath.

“By the way,” you said, acutely aware of the wet ache between your thighs, “I live alone, if you wanna return the favor.”

[lesbicosmos-writes]

@deadboyween day 11

the day we've all been waiting for!!

day 11 prompt: halloween

summary: the girls wonder if the boys have ever done anything for halloween. they convince them to have a mini party at the office - including costumes.

notes: this fic brought to you by my love of comic!crystal being a nerdy cosplayer <333

also on ao3!

the case of the halloween party

“Do you think Charles and Edwin celebrate Halloween?” Niko asked, lounging on the floor of the office while Crystal was on the sofa, her laptop propped open on her lap.

The boys had gone out ‘to the library’ to do what they called ‘private ghost research’ – but both Crystal and Niko knew that was just their code phrase for a date – leaving the girls to their own devices back at the office. Niko had been reading but her attention span had depleted several minutes ago, while Crystal was trying to win a bid for a cursed teacup someone was trying to sell on eBay.

“I dunno. Wouldn’t that be a bit weird? Spooky supernatural beings celebrating a human-made spooky supernatural holiday?”

“I think it would be even better as a ghost,” Niko commented. “You could actually, properly scare people.”

“True. I wouldn’t exactly have taken Edwin for a Halloween kind of guy though.”

“Maybe we can try and do something with them! We’ve only got two weeks left! I think we can convince them to dress up, at least.”

“Good luck with that,” Crystal chuckled.

“Oh my god! We could go as Mystery Inc.!” Niko sat upright, clearly already making plans.

“Ah, um…I’d love to Niko, but I kind of already had my costume planned.”

“Oh. Do you already have plans for the day?”

“Not really. A lot of the clubs around here do Halloween nights so I was probably just gonna go to one of those if we weren’t busy. I’d rather do something with you guys though, clubs are no fun on your own.”

“What’s your costume plan, then?” Niko asked.

“Well, I used to be really into cosplay and-”

Niko cut her off.

“You were into cosplay?” she asked incredulously.

“Yeah?” Crystal shrugged.

“I thought you were like…a typical mean girl?”

“Well, I was a typical mean girl who happened to love cosplaying characters from video games.”

Niko stared at her girlfriend open-mouthed, her eyes wide.

“I’m in love with you,” she said simply.

Crystal laughed.

“I think you’ve mentioned that before.”

“How have you never told me you used to cosplay?”

“It just never came up, I guess,” Crystal chuckled.

“So, who are you dressing as?”

“Oh, just this character from a pretty niche game.”

“What game?”

“Yonda.”

“You play Yonda? I love that game!” Niko had moved forwards and was sitting beside Crystal on the tiny sofa.

“Really?”

“Yes!” Niko replied excitedly. “Ayumi was like...my lesbian awakening!”

Crystal’s face morphed into a smirk. “Well…”

“No. You’re not.”

“Mhm,” Crystal hummed, teasingly.

“Oh my god Crystal I need to see this right now,” Niko all but shrieked.

“You’ll just have to wait til Halloween babe,” Crystal said, leaning forward to press a kiss to Niko’s lips.

“Ughhhh,” Niko groaned, just as the mirror rippled and Charles and Edwin stepped through it.

“What’s going on?” Charles asked, perching himself on the arm of the sofa next to Niko.

“Oh, Crystal and I were just discussing Halloween costumes.”

“Costumes?” Edwin asked, the tone of his voice somewhere between confused and ever so slightly judging.

“Yeah? Don’t tell me you’ve never dressed up for Halloween!” Niko sat upright on the sofa.

“I’ve been trying to get him to for years but he just refuses,” Charles complained, shaking his head slightly.

Niko jumped up from the sofa and stepped towards Edwin.

“Edwin, you have to!”

“I was under the impression that this strange tradition of dressing up was only for events like parties. I’m afraid I don’t see the point of it when we have no party to attend,” Edwin explained.

“We can have our own!” Niko waved her arms in the air a little, turning to face the others to see their reactions.

Crystal had a smile on her face but reluctantly asked, “Who would we even invite, Niko?”

“Jenny!” Niko said, pointing to one finger as though counting.

Everyone looked at her expectantly, waiting for the rest of the hypothetical guest list. Jenny had moved her shop to London but she was still about the only person any of the group really knew.

“Okay I guess it’s just Jenny but still! I could bake! We could decorate the office! It’d be fun!”

Who could resist Niko Sasaki when she looked so excited and full of joy? Sure, it wouldn’t be much of a typical party, but it could be a celebration in their own way, so everyone eventually agreed that they would have a gathering on Halloween night. Edwin still insisted they kept the agency open just in case – there never had been a Halloween without a strange new case to crack in the many years they had been working together.

As expected, Niko got very into the party planning. She was planning on baking enough snacks to feed a small army – including finding a recipe and enchantment for biscuits and sweets ghosts could eat thanks to Tragic Mick. She and Edwin had been crafting decorations while Charles and Crystal went out to buy supplies.

“So what do you want to dress as?” Niko asked, cutting out skull-shaped bunting.

“I’m not sure. I don’t think I want to dress too differently, if possible. The idea is still a little silly to me, I must admit.”

“Everyone dresses up on Halloween, Edwin. It’s the one day a year where cosplaying is normalised – expected, even! But if you want to keep your style as much as you can, I think I have an idea.”

“What is it?”

“That’s a surprise,” Niko grinned. “You trust me, yeah?”

“Of course,” Edwin replied sincerely.

The surprise didn’t last very long. Merely one day later, Niko returned to the office with inspiration for Edwin’s outfit to show him, and he wasn’t as against the idea as she expected him to be. Crystal was there too, and was as excited about the costume as Niko was. But they all agreed to keep it as a secret from Charles – who was being very secretive over his own idea anyway.

Soon enough, Halloween arrived. The office was decorated with a mixture of lovingly crafted handmade decorations and ornaments bought from shops. Niko’s paper skull bunting hung across the doorframe and across the blank wall between the games closet and the desk. She had also made bats to hang from the ceiling by string. The four of them had carved pumpkins the day prior, to varying degrees of precision, which all sat along the windowsill. Edwin had intricately folded several little origami pumpkins and placed them on the bookshelves, while tiny plastic ornaments of skulls and bats and witches’ hats sat amongst them. A string of brightly coloured lights shaped like skulls were suspended across the window.

The largest of the decorations were two plastic hanging skeletons, which hung either side of the door. They had been plain when Crystal bought them, but she and Niko had crafted a tiny bow tie and book for one of them, and an earring, backpack and cricket bat for the other. Edwin seemed sceptical about the mini him-and-Charles, but grew fond of them after seeing Charles’s grin when Crystal hung them up.

The office looked different, but somehow the atmosphere hadn’t really changed – after all, it was the permanent residence of two ghosts in the first place.

It was 5pm, and the girls were currently both in the bathroom getting into their costumes, while the boys waited in the main room of the office, both still in their usual outfits.

“So like, you really never did anything?” Charles asked.

“Charles, I’ve told you several times over the years. When I was alive, Halloween wasn’t as much of a deal as it was now. It was a childish holiday. A few of the boys at school would sneak out to the cemetery at night, or play games in the dormitories, but people rarely dressed up or had parties like you do now.”

“Right. Sorry. I mean, it wasn’t like a huge thing when I was alive – not for my family, anyway. My dad thought it was stupid, so even if my friends did have a party I could never go. It always looked so much cooler in America, like it is in films and stuff.”

“Hmm,” Edwin hummed.

“So…what’s your costume?” Charles asked.

He’d been trying to get Edwin to tell him for a week, but he didn’t budge, insisting it was a surprise.

“I’m not telling you,” Edwin replied, a smug smirk on his face.

“You’re evil.”

“Oh really? Because I seem to remember you saying something different when you were kissing me ten minutes ago.”

“Oi!” Charles grinned.

The sound of giggling echoed through the bathroom door, and both ghosts turned towards it.

“Seriously, what are they doing in there?” Edwin asked, folding his arms.

“I dunno, mate. Girls and bathrooms, innit? They always go in pairs and take forever and come out giggling like maniacs.”

“So strange.”

“Yup.”

“How long does it take to change clothes? They’ve been in there for nearly an hour.”

Charles stepped forwards and knocked on the door.

“Hey, uh, are you two good in there? You’ve been in there ages,” he said.

“We’re fine,” Niko laughed.

“You better not be snogging!”

“Charles you can’t say anything, we know you were making out with Edwin like ten minutes ago.”

Charles opened his mouth to argue but ultimately gave up. “Okay fine, shut up,” he said instead.

More laughter erupted from the door, and Charles gave up, walking back over to the desk.

It was several minutes later when the door to the tiny bathroom finally opened. Charles and Edwin stood up straight, ready to see the girls’ outfits…

…only to find the two of them standing there with white sheets over their heads, holes cut out of the faces so their eyes could be seen.

Charles snorted, but Edwin didn’t seem as amused. Perhaps if you looked closer though…maybe there was a slight smirk hidden there on his face. Maybe.

“Very funny,” he said sarcastically.

“We’re ghosts!” Niko said, giggling.

“Yes, I can see that, Niko.”

“Come on, it’s a little funny!” Crystal argued.

“Fine,” Edwin gave in, letting that tiny smirk be more obvious on his face.

“Anyway, these aren’t our real costumes. Don’t worry,” Niko said, and both she and Crystal pulled the sheets from their heads and threw them onto the sofa.

Niko had the more recognisable costume of the two – a bright orange turtleneck and matching socks, along with a short red skirt. What with her usual bright monochromatic wardrobe choices, the other three had seen every main part of the outfit before many times. What they hadn’t seen before were the large-rimmed glasses that rested on her nose, or the short brown wig she wore that seemed to conceal her bright white hair so well, it was as if it wasn’t even there beneath it.

“Velma!” Edwin said, smiling.

“Yeah!”

Then the boys turned to Crystal, and both of their faces morphed into confusion.

“You guys have no idea who I am do you?” she laughed.

“I’m afraid we don’t.”

“Wasn’t expecting you to, don’t worry. I’m Ayumi from Yonda.”

“Are those words?” Edwin asked, one eyebrow raised.

“It’s a video game,” Niko explained.

“Oh, nice! Well, you look great. Both of you,” Charles said.

“Thank you,” Niko smiled.

“Right, now it’s your turn,” Crystal turned to the boys, a smile on her face.

“Do we really have to?” Edwin complained.

“Yes!” Niko exclaimed, ushering him into the bathroom and closing the door behind them.

Since the boys didn’t exactly get changed into their costumes, each had one of the girls there to help them alter their appearances, especially since they also didn’t have reflections. So, Niko joined Edwin in the bathroom whilst Crystal helped Charles in the office.

Edwin managed to get his costume right fairly quickly – Niko had made him practise whenever they got the chance and were away from the other two. Niko looked him up and down, smiling to herself.

“Perfect!” she grinned.

He was dressed as a traditional vampire, and thanks to some convincing from the girls (otherwise known as Niko’s puppy eyes – Edwin really ought to learn to say no to her), he’d also manifested a pair of fangs. He couldn’t alter his own body, but he’d managed to create a pair of plastic ones that fitted perfectly to his canine teeth.

“Oh my god you look so good!” Niko said, using a finger to dab some fake blood onto the corner of his mouth, so it dripped down his chin.

“Niko, is this strange sticky concoction really necessary?”

“Yes! How will anyone know you’re a spooky vampire without fake blood?”

“I think it’s fairly obvious from the rest of the outfit. And the fangs,” Edwin chuckled.

“Oh well. It looks cooler.”

Edwin wasn’t going to argue with her. Niko shuffled around him in the tiny bathroom before she reached the door. She knocked on it a couple of times.

“Hey, is Charles ready?”

“Nearly, just finishing up his…nearly!” Crystal replied from the other side of the door.

“Yay!” Niko grinned, placing her hands together in front of her like she was running some evil scheme. Edwin had come to fear that look.

“Ready!” Crystal called.

Niko opened the bathroom door, and both of them stepped out.

Edwin froze when he saw Charles. Charles seemed to freeze too, the two of them just staring at one another open-mouthed.

“Pick your jaws up off the floor, you two,” Crystal said, her arms folded in front of her.

“Shh let them ogle,” Niko said, that grin still plastered across her face.

In terms of style, Edwin’s costume wasn’t too dissimilar from what he usually wore; the blue sweater vest was replaced by a red waistcoat, and a frilly collar took the place of his bow tie. His trousers were black instead of pinstripe grey, and his brown coat was now black and had a higher, upturned collar. It was different enough to be considered a costume, but similar enough that it wasn’t too uncomfortable, and he wasn’t revealing any more skin than usual.

The same could not be said for Charles’s costume. He wore what appeared to be a teal surgical gown, only unlike actual surgical gowns, this one cut off halfway down his thighs. Under it, he wore fishnet tights and boots that resembled the ones Edwin usually wore. He had a pearl necklace around his neck, and bright pink rubber gloves on. And that wasn’t even mentioning the make-up. Of course, Charles always wore eyeliner, but this was different. His eyelids were painted the same teal as his outfit all the way up to his eyebrows, and he wore lipstick.

“He wouldn’t wear the heels,” Crystal tutted, shaking her head at him in disappointment.

Edwin recognised the costume from a movie Crystal had made them watch a few weeks prior. Charles had already seen it, had snuck into the cinema to watch it with a girl when it was playing on Halloween the year before he died. It hadn’t been a date; Charles was sure to tell them. They were just the only ones who wanted to watch it - all their other friends had claimed it was for queers. Charles had brushed it off at the time, but now saw the ironic truth in their claim, given both his recent revelations and the fact he knew that girl he snuck out with was now happily married to a woman.

“Mate, you look…” Charles began.

“Charles…” Edwin breathed, unable to tear his eyes away from Charles’s legs.

He’d seen Charles’s legs many times by now, but never like this and never in this context. It was overwhelming and he couldn’t figure out how to look anywhere else.

“His face is further up, Edwin,” Crystal teased. “Jeez, now I’m glad we didn’t go for the corset,” she muttered to Niko.

“Do you guys want us to leave you alone?” Niko smirked.

Edwin cleared his throat, finally managing to look somewhere other than his boyfriend’s legs in those fishnets.

“No, that won’t be necessary. Besides, Jenny will be here soon,” he said, hoping no one noticed the way his voice cracked a little.

Everyone noticed.

As Edwin and Niko headed over to the desk to lay out the food, Crystal stepped towards Charles – who was still silent and staring.

“Are you okay there, buddy?” she asked, the amusement clear in her voice.

Charles snapped out of it, turning to face her.

“Yeah. Aces, why?”

“Hmm…sure,” Crystal smirked.

It was nearly twenty minutes later when Jenny arrived. She was also dressed as a vampire, wearing a dark red corset top over a flowy white long-sleeved shirt with black trousers and a collared cloak. The shirt had several small bloodstains on it. She brought in a tray of pastries that were made to resemble severed fingers.

Niko came running over to her and took the tray from her hands.

“Oh my god! You and Edwin match!” she exclaimed, pointing between the two of them.

Jenny looked up to Edwin, who appeared to be looking for a book on their many shelves.

“Dracula. Neat,” she said.

“Just a generic vampire, I’m afraid,” Edwin corrected. “Although, I suppose it could be Count Dracula.”

“Right, okay.”

“Are you a specific one?” Crystal asked before biting into one of Niko’s decorated cookies.

“Yeah, I’m meant to be Carmilla.”

Everyone looked at her blankly.

“Carmilla Karnstein? From the book Carmilla? Like one of the first pieces of vampire literature?” Jenny asked, bewildered.

“I cannot say I have ever read it,” Edwin apologised.

“Well, you should. It’s a classic. And it’s really gay, so…”

Jenny turned around once more, taking one of the skull-emblazoned paper plates Crystal had found in a shop and moving onto the food.

“Is that blood…real?” Charles asked her, pointing out the stains on her shirt.

Jenny just raised her eyebrows and took a bite out of one of Niko’s cookies. Charles didn’t want to think about that too hard.

“Nice Frank-N-Furter costume,” she said. “Good to know you’re not entirely uncultured.”

“Thanks,” Charles replied. “So, what food is enchanted?” he asked excitedly, practically bouncing over to Edwin.

Edwin and Niko had successfully baked some foods that the ghosts could eat, and Charles had been incredibly excited about it for days. He really missed food.

“Aptly enough, the cookies shaped like ghosts. And also, the white marshmallows. Not the orange ones, though,” said Edwin.

“Brills,” Charles said, already reaching across the desk to take one of the cookies.

He took a bite, and the satisfied sound he made gave Edwin flashbacks he’d rather not be thinking about with other people in the room.

“These are so good, Niko,” he said, giving her a playful punch to the arm. “God, I missed food. Can you do this to anything?” he asked Edwin.

“I believe the enchantment will need a few tweaks depending on what item it is, but yes. Don’t worry Charles, you’ll get your enchanted spaghetti,” Edwin laughed, practically reading Charles’s mind.

“I love you, you know that right?”

“I do believe you’ve mentioned it once or twice before.”

“Are you guys just gonna keep flirting all night or are we gonna do more party things?” Crystal asked from where she was sitting in Edwin’s usual chair.

“We can multitask,” Charles argued, throwing an arm around Edwin’s shoulders and kissing him on the cheek.

Crystal was beginning to regret her involvement in getting them together. Niko walked over and perched on the arm of the chair beside her, leaning in to kiss her. Okay, maybe she could multitask too.

“Wow you guys, way to make a woman feel single,” Jenny said from the other side of the room. “You two are literally dead and you’ve got more game than me,” she looked over at the boys.

“Don’t worry Jenny, we’ll find you someone!” Niko reassured.

“Preferably someone who isn’t a psycho murderer who stalks me this time.”

Niko nodded, looking at the ground. Enough time had passed now that they could make light-hearted jokes about the Maxine situation, but it still left as much trauma as expected for Jenny. Niko still felt guilty, even though she’d been mostly forgiven.

The vague tension in the room was interrupted by a knock at the door.

“Do we really have to take a case?” Niko groaned.

“I don’t think it is a case, Niko, don’t worry,” Edwin said, walking to the door while Charles reached into the games cupboard and pulled out a large green bowl, filled with what looked like tiny little trinkets.

Edwin opened the door.

“Trick or treat!” came the small voices from outside.

There were three small children: a young girl around nine years old dressed as a witch, a boy around the same age with a werewolf mask, and another girl who looked no older than about two wearing a pumpkin outfit. All three of them had similar burn scars on their faces and arms.

“Hey, you three! Happy Halloween!” Charles said, offering the bowl out to them.

They all took two tiny curios each. A green feather, an engraved brass ring, a chunk of amethyst, a tiny brooch with a leaf design, a small bag of pink dust, and a wishbone. All small harmless items the boys had picked up over the years but had no use for – but always brought joy to the faces of the young ghosts in the neighbourhood.

“You’re dressed up!” the older girl said, surprised.

“Yeah, thought we’d give it a go this year,” Charles said.

“What are you meant to be?” the boy asked him.

“Uhhh,” Charles stammered.

“Shouldn’t you three be running along? The night won’t last forever, you know. I heard the fortune teller down the road is giving out magical coins!” Edwin cut in.

All three children gasped.

“Really?”

“Yes, but they won’t be there forever so you’d better go quick!”

“Thanks Edwin!” said the girl.

“Bye Charles!” said the boy.

Charles gave the youngest a high five before all three of them leapt down the staircase excitedly.

When they closed the door and turned back around to face the room, they were met with looks of confusion from Crystal, Niko and Jenny.

“What-” Crystal began.

“The ghost children in the area come around every year, we always make sure we have trinkets to give them since they can’t eat sweets.”

“Hey maybe next year we can actually give them enchanted sweets!” Charles suggested.

“Wait, those three were ghosts? Did they all-” Jenny trailed off.

“The James siblings. They all died in a housefire a couple of years ago. Their parents were out shopping so they had a babysitter, but none of them survived the fire. Death came for the babysitter, but the children were all hiding in the rubble,” Edwin explained.

“Shit, those poor kids. I bet their parents feel horrific, oh my god.”

“That is precisely why we haven’t reported them to the Lost and Found Department,” Edwin said sternly. “The parents got into a terrible car accident upon getting the phone call about the children. They both survived, but only barely. They can see ghosts now, so the family is reunited.”

As Edwin spoke, Charles walked over to the window.

“Their dads are just outside, look,” he pointed across the road.

Everyone gathered around him and looked down. They saw the three children running over to two men stood on the opposite side of the road. They all showed their buckets to their parents excitedly, then pointed down the road. Their parents laughed, and the family all headed off down the road together.

“That’s sweet,” said Niko. “They’re still all together.”

“Precisely. It’s nice to know tragedy doesn’t always end in entirely pain.”

The others didn’t miss the way Edwin looked towards Charles as he spoke.

Unsurprisingly, it didn’t take long before the boys insisted on a game of Cluedo.

“Not fair, you guys always win!” Crystal argued.

“Well, we’ve got thirty-four years on you, Crystal.”

“Also, it’s more a game of luck than one of skill. If you get a good hand of cards to mark things off, you’re already further ahead than other players.”

“Yeah, yeah, fine whatever. But if you guys win, you owe me, like, the entirety of the payment for the next case.”

“Deal,” Edwin agreed, and they shook on it.

“Hey! What about me?” Niko pouted.

“You win almost as often as they do, babe.”

“I keep telling you! You should watch more Scooby Doo,” Niko shrugged, leaning her head on Crystal’s shoulder.

The deal however, never got resolved. Halfway through the game, there was another knock on the door, and this time it wasn’t ghostly trick-or-treaters; it was a case. And surprisingly, it was a real one. Usually on Halloween, their cases were less often genuine supernatural encounters and more often paranoid older ghosts misunderstanding typical Halloween living-people things. But this one was real. It wasn’t difficult, and only took them an hour or so to solve, but it was real.

Someone nearby had been having their own ghostly Halloween party, but their decorations had all been possessed by mischievous imps that had begun causing havoc. But the Dead Boy Detectives had dealt with imps dozens of times before; they arrived, set a few traps, Edwin cast a few spells, Charles swung his bat a few times, and the job was successfully jobbed.

By the time they got back to the office, Niko had already beaten Crystal and Jenny at Cluedo twice, and they were currently tied one-all in a very intense Uno tournament. When Crystal won the fourth game, they decided to wrap it up.

Then, Niko suggested – well, insisted, but no one can resist her puppy eyes – that they play Monopoly. Her argument was that it was thematically relevant since the box they had was Beetlejuice themed.

The game was as loud and chaotic as anyone would expect, and Crystal and Jenny both nearly flipped the board twice each in the first half an hour. Charles was the first to go bankrupt, closely followed by Edwin. The other three swore they planned it in advance, since they used it to their advantage, sneaking off into the games cupboard for a snog and locking the door whilst Jenny was in the bathroom, Crystal was clearing away the empty food trays and Niko was distracted watching fireworks outside the window. They were in there for the entire last ninety minutes of the game, and when they finally stepped back into the room, both had incredibly messy hair, and both Charles’s lipstick and Edwin’s fake blood were smudged over both of their chins. Crystal had never been happier that they put a silencing spell on the cupboard a few months prior. But then again, it meant they had an excuse to disappear into there whenever they felt like it. God, she and Niko needed to get payback at some point.

“Could you guys not have waited until after everyone else left?” Crystal asked, her eyebrows raised at them.

“Hey, don’t look at me,” Charles put his hands up in defence. “It’s not my fault this one couldn’t keep his eyes off my legs.”

“It absolutely is your fault for wearing those tights.”

“And on that note, I’m leaving,” Jenny butted in, standing up from the sofa. “This was great, but it’s nearly midnight and unlike you guys who don’t seem to have a schedule, I have a shop to open at nine o’clock tomorrow.”

“Understandable. Goodnight, Jenny,” Edwin said, reaching to readjust his bow tie only to remember he wasn’t wearing one.

“Yeah, Niko and I should probably head off, too,” Crystal said.

“Do we have to?” Niko complained, but her face changed when she turned and saw that Crystal was giving her a look. “Oh. Yes. Definitely. We should go.”

“We’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” Charles said.

“Yep. ‘Night guys! Great party, we should definitely do that every year!”

“I must admit it was…much more enjoyable than I anticipated,” Edwin admitted.

“See! Told you you’d like it.”

Niko hugged Edwin before she was practically dragged out of the room by Crystal.

“Oh! I forgot my jacket,” Niko realised when she and Crystal were halfway down the road, and she had begun to shiver.

“Here, take mine,” Crystal said, taking hers off and placing it around Niko’s shoulders. “I highly doubt we would wanna go back in there.”

Niko snickered, locking her arm with Crystal’s.

“Seriously, they’re insatiable! At least we’re more subtle about it.”

“Give them some slack, they’ve got over thirty years of built-up sexual tension to resolve!”

“I really don’t wanna think about those two resolving their tension,” Crystal practically gagged.

“Maybe you wanna think about me in this turtleneck instead?” Niko said suggestively.

“I-” Crystal stammered.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice you staring at my chest all night,” she teased.

“Okay, shut up.”

“Hey, it’s allowed. I’ve been staring at you all night, too. I told you Ayumi was my gay awakening, and I was not kidding.”

“Glad you thought my costume was a success, then.”

“I think tonight was a success! I don’t think we’ll have any trouble convincing the boys to properly celebrate dress up again next year. Maybe we can even get Charles to do the full corset look!”

“I’d rather not be in the room, or even anywhere near the room, when Edwin sees that.”

“Fair,” Niko giggled.

Illuminated by streetlamps and the soft glow of pumpkins and decorative lights from nearby apartment buildings, the two of them walked back to their flat.

Maybe it was a little strange that two supernatural beings began celebrating a holiday that turned them into novelty ornaments or silly stories. Or maybe it made perfect sense: two ghosts, their psychic best friend, their other best friend who had literally died once, and reluctant older sister figure who just happened to have been possessed by Crystal’s demon ex-boyfriend one time and got herself involved with everything – celebrating Halloween as a strange little family.

[meraki-yao]

Another anon but please, share the nicknames🥹 I want cute things after all the chaos it’s been created because of people projecting things

Here are a few cute/fun ones that I know of!

Note 1: I'm bilingual and I'll try my best to translate it but certain things get lost in translation, I'll add the original Chinese text if you want to look up Google Translate or something, and the reason for said nickname

Note 2: A thing in Chinese nicknames is adding the character 小 meaning small/little to the beginning or repeating the same character as a sign of affection, I don't know why that's a thing but it just... kind is and has been for forever

Note 3: They use the nicknames interchangeably between the boys and Firstprince, and this has something to do with how Chinese audiences view shipping, especially in queer media which is a topic I do not want to get into right now, it would be a fucking mess.

Alright now that that's out of the way!

Nick/Henry:

王子 Prince, self-explanatory

小藍 Little Blue, self-explanatory

小王子 Little Prince, self-explanatory

貓貓/小貓 Kitty, in East Asian Culture people assign the two people in a ship as a cat or a dog, they think he's a golden British shorthair

小肥鵝 ... Chubby Little Goose. Yes, it's weird af but it got popular after a reaction video repeatedly referred to Henry as that. Two reasons: 1, Henry/Nick with kiss-swollen lips, specifically in the Paris scene reminded them of a ... goose... for some reason...? 2, um, uh, so there is a common dish in Chinese cuisine called 燒鵝 Roasted goose, and the first character 燒 （shāo）is nearly homophonic with the character for .... horny/flirtatious 騷 (sāo)... so given that scene...yeah go figure. I've seen literal fan art and fan merch of Henry as a goose. It's weird but hilarious to me.

甜心 sweetheart, fairly self-explanatory although the actual meaning it carries is close to "babygirl"

寶寶 baby, as in literal child, in fact my mom calls me that

老婆 wife, um, China, or actually as far as I know East Asians tend to feminize the bottom of a queer relationship and they're oddly persistent on positions which... all I can say is it's a cultural difference thing that doesn't have any disrespectful or harmful intentions but yeah

公主 Princess, same as above

媽媽/媽咪 Mommy ... yeah I'm gonna leave that there

Taylor/Alex:

第一公子 First son (第一 means first, 公子(gōngzǐ) is the phrase referring to a gentleman in ancient Chinese, more specifically sons of noblemen, if you watch costume c dramas you probably hear it a lot) most of the time they just use 公子 though

小紅 Little Red, Self-explanatory

太陽花 Sunflower, a simile for his fucking eyelashes

狗狗/小狗 Puppy, same explanation as Kitty, in particular, they think he's a Berner Sennenhund

美狗魚 merpuppy, like a mermaid, but a puppy, mostly due to how fucking beautiful and handsome he looks in the lake scene

老公 husband, same explanation as wife, just the opposite/ complimentary

爸爸/爸比 Daddy, yeah not gonna elaborate on that one either

Chinese fandoms, or honestly, East Asian fandoms tend to be a toxic mess (think about how notoriously toxic the reputation of k pop stans are) which is why I prefer sticking to the Western side the vast majority of the times I'm in fandoms such as RWRB, but there are some beautiful things in the midst of the mess that I occasionally check out.

Anyways yeah! That's a list of nicknames this side of the world gave the boys! I honestly don't know if it's still fun after translation but I hope this was a bit of fun????

[innytoes]

25 and Willex (bonus points if the child/dog/friend is Reggie?) (If you're still taking prompts for this 😁)

Every year for Halloween, Willie went back to the group home where he'd stayed to volunteer to take the kids trick or treating. Not only was it a way of giving back - of assuaging the guilt he sometimes felt, wondering why Caleb had picked a chaotic, messy fourteen year old over any of the sweeter, smaller kids - but it was amazing fun too.

He got to dress up, run around with a bunch of kids, and also maybe keep a list of houses to come back and egg later, if they were weird or stuck up about 'those group home kids begging for candy'.

Besides, being 18 at the Hollywood Ghost Club on Halloween sucked. It wasn't even like he could use his fake ID, the bartenders all knew him. And Caleb was super strict about stuff like that during business hours. So he helped out at the group home, and then went to the staff party at the Club the day after, when they were closed and nobody cared too much about whether or not a certain son of the owner swiped a Bloodtini. Or skated off the railing. Or tried to dunk the green grilled cheeses in the chocolate fountain.

And okay, so maybe this year his costume was a little obscure, but he'd procrastinated getting anything, so he ended up raiding Caleb's old costumes from his 'I did other stuff on Broadway too you know' closet, and some of his own, and a trip to the dollar store, and he was pretty pleased with himself.

Except clearly someone recognised him.

"OH MY GOD, ZEKE ZILLIONS SPACE COWBOY?" someone across the street screamed, before dragging someone by the arm over to them.

"See, I told you he was a real character," Willie told the four nine year olds he was chaperoning. They rolled their eyes at him.

"Oh my god oh my god," A boy about his age said. He was dressed up as a zombie, though for some reason he was also carrying a wok. His friend was also a zombie, but had on a long pink wig, giant fake pearls, and a pink dress. He had great legs. "Zeke Zillions Space Cowboy was my absolute favourite cartoon as a kid. Can I please get a picture? Pretty please?"

"Sure can, Pard'ner," he said in his best Zeke Zillions impression, and the guy straight up went 'EEEEeee' like he was an early twothousands internet fangirl. After his friend took a bunch of pictures, he thanked the kids for their patience.

"By the way, number 42 is handing out full-sized candy bars," ZomBarbie said.

Throughout the night, every time they crossed paths (ZomBarbie and the Wokking Dead were accompanied by a witch, Kurt Cobain, and a tiny ghost buster), they'd wave at each other, as his fan shouted out a 'HI ZEKE!'. Eventually they ended up at the same house, waiting for the kids to get back.

"Sorry about Reggie," ZomBarbie said. "He's um, kind of a fanboy for that show. Like, writes-fanfiction-and-goes-to-obscure-fan-meet-ups kind of fan. I think you just made his year."

"That's okay, I'm glad someone remembers good old Zeke," Willie said. He was definitely going sleuthing on AO3 later. He wondered what the ships were. "The show meant a lot to me as a kid, what with the obvious queer-coding." Hopefully, a cute boy in a dress would understand that.

"Yeah," ZomBarbie said. "My parents didn't allow me to watch it. Too worried I'd turn out 'fruity'." He motioned to himself. "Clearly they succeeded," he said sarcastically.

"You do really pull off that dress, though," Willie said, waggling his eyebrows. His zombie friend went adorably flustered, from what he could tell under the zombie makeup.

Before he could flirt any more, the kids came back, complaining about how this house was handing out toothbrushes and toothpaste. "Can you put them on the list, Willie?" one of them, the girl dressed as Coraline, asked.

"Handing out toothbrushes is kind of dorky, but not an egg-able offense," Willie told her. "We reserve that for bigots and assholes."

"You have a list?" ZomBarbie asked, as they walked to the next house. His kids and the little Ghost Buster were comparing notes, it seemed, pointing at different houses.

"Yeah, lot of people in this fancy-pants neighbourhood don't take kindly to poor foster kids showing up," Willie said darkly.

"Carlos said something about that white house with the American Flag outside complaining about him going back to his own neighbourhood," the witch said darkly. "We live two blocks from here."

Willie glared, and made a note of it. "You wanna join me?" he asked, mostly to ZomBarbie, but quickly looking away at the rest of the group.

"My tía would kill me," the witch said, before smiling slyly. "But I'm sure Alex wouldn't mind going."

ZomBarbie spluttered a little, but managed to squeak out a little 'okay!'

Jackpot.

Behind him, he heard the guy's friend sigh happily. "And once again, Zeke Zillions saves the day, dispenses justice to evil doers, and captures hearts."

[isopodonanescalator]

OKAY SO. who wants to talk about rent? because I DO!!! this afternoon i saw a production at this random little theatre downtown. (i’ll add pictures at the end btw) it was a bunch of college kids in the show, and let me just say: they were cast SO perfectly it’s not even funny. i want to go character by character because it was really awesome and i loved it and i forgot how much i loved this show (even if it has some flaws), but before i do a character analysis and such, let me give some background info! i had front row seats, and since there wasn’t really an actual stage, the actors were directly in front of us and that was super cool!! there was a couple bits of audience interaction which i liked and i also made eye contact with a couple people and i almost died. onto the characters!!!

starting off strong with Roger because he’s my favorite! the vocals were so strong and full and i was blown away by how amazing he was (im in love with him no joke like holy crap) he made me cry MULTIPLE times in the second act because he showed his emotion so strongly and it like radiated off of him. ALSO HE MADE EYE CONTACT WITH ME NOT ONCE, BUT T H R E E TIMES!!!!!! I DIEEEED I SWOONED I CRIED OMG 😭😭😭 um but yeah his vocals stunned me and he showcased his emotions very very well! (he was also really attractive but that’s irrelevant)

next up is Mark because it just seems wrong to not put him after Roger 😭 he played his role so wonderfully and it was really insane how much resemblance he had to the character!!! like he looks exactly like how Mark should look and it was perfect. i really liked his mannerisms and the way he articulated certain lines scratched my brain very good!! his voice was ALSO phenomenal and his mother (who was sitting next to us) told us that he hadn’t sung in TWO YEARS so for him to sound that good after not performing in a musical for so long was literally amazing!!! he also made eye contact with me after Angels death while i was crying on my friends shoulder, and he like gave me a little nod which was very lovely. i really enjoyed how he played Mark, 10/10 fr!

Tom Collins next: his voice had such a nice bass tone to it and it was really pretty and eep! i absolutely LOVED how he looked at Angel almost any chance he had throughout the show, and i don’t know if it was staged or it was a character choice but i liked it. i don’t have much else to say about him because i payed a lot more attention to Roger (😭) but he also did a really great job!!!

ANGELLLLLL!!!! OH MY FREAKING GOODNESS I REALLY LIKED HOW SHE WAS PORTRAYED IN THIS PRODUCTION! i was very scared at first because of the fact that it was a small performance and i wasn’t sure how good it would be, but the actor was amazing. also: the costuming department absolutely AAAATTEEE with all of Angels outfits because they were on point! my friend and i freaked out every time there was a costume change because they were all so cool! the actor had such a lovely vocal range and i think it was sooo perfect for the character!!!

Mimi was ICONIC. first off, she was about my height which i was super excited about because you don’t always see a lot of super short girls playing the leads. she was like a foot shorter than Roger and she was so cuteeee!! her voice was SO strong and she had really nice breath control, but she had a lot of vibrato, which kind of threw me off at first. overall, i loved the way she played her, she made her very sad and she seemed super torn throughout a lot of the show.

i’m going to put Maureen and Joanne into one paragraph because i don’t have a lot to say about them. Joanne had a REALLY nice belt like her voice was supported and loud and take me for what i am was BEAUTIFUL!!! between her and Maureen that song was super good and you could almost feel the tension. also i have No Day But Today written on my converse, and Maureen saw them when she was on the ground near us during one of the scenes, and she pointed and smiled!

that’s really all i have to say, but feel free to ask about anything if you’re curious (that’s mostly for @loganschwarzy because i know you were wondering about Angel)

this was their set, and there was a bunch of parts of the walls that spun and worked like doors which i thought was THE COOLEST!!!

before the show started they were playing city noises over the speakers which was also cool!

these are my converse that Maureen pointed at!

[bittersweet-adagio]

i finally did my oc pinterest boards… also i have tiny info on them to go along with it!!!

khoi’s board

gothic vampire-y style????

half because he enjoys the style half because guardian lycos prefers he wears this style

he actually has pierced ears as well i’ve just never drawn it or mentioned it LMAO

ivan and marshall lee mostly inspired his character. like if ivan and marshall lee had a baby???? marshall lee because of his like nonchalant cool whatever whatever silliness (+ parental issues) and ivan because. love idk how to explain

sai’s board

visual kei. i know it might be a little hard to differentiate from khoi but i PROMISE they are so different. think of a lot of accessories for sai but less for khoi.

this board has more pins than the rest. this is because sai is canonically a demiboy and doesn’t mind dressing femininely. there are sections for masculine and feminine outfits. (i still kept his ID number as 01 since i felt like ??? ehh idk about putting them as a diff number…)

they kind of like dressing up but sometimes the accessories start messing with him and they stop liking it so much. guardian lavan treats him like a doll.

all the makeup in the costume concepts yes they would wear that

vincent (dead plate) and yuri (ddlc) inspired his character. take that as you will honestly i’m not elaborating

ellie’s board

princess cutesy fairy i love life silly whimsical fun

guardian shui and ellie spent a while discussing what ellie would want to dress up as for shoots and such and they decided this would be what they both agreed on and wanted.

loves jewelry and bows!!! she has pierced ears plus she wears crowns

tsukasa tenma and ocean o’connell rosenberg inspired her character. her judginess and “I AM ALWAYS NUMBER ONE” attitude comes from ocean and her whimsical teehee silly confidence comes from tsukasa

vera’s board

very vintage but very cute at the same time

SHE HATES DRESSING THIS WAY but at least she looks cute and she doesn’t really complain about it because guardian kora would flip out

she finds the accessories really uncomfortable and would much rather wear clothes she makes herself

sara chidouin and mari (omori) inspired her character because of leadership potential, sisterly/motherly behavior, perfectionism, and um… other things…

the inspiration characters are also pretty light inspo i think??? not really??? i have no idea

this is for like photoshoots and such and MAYBE costumes they’d wear on stage but uh yeah you guys can uhhh tell me how you feel about these yayyy enjoy

[mommymothma]

Dave who gave you permission to tug on my heart strings like that?

Here is like the most concise version of my thoughts I am capable of generating 5 minutes after the finally

1. Ezra ahsoka and Sabine are the knee father son and holy spirit I love them and would die for them

2. Sabine's helmet just auto generating into the world was awesome. It means ahsoka picked it up and brought it for her queen behaviour

3. I appreciate that they mention Kanan by name this live action shows sometimes have a habit of just not mentioning important animated characters (like how Satine wasn't mentioned once in the mandalorian)

4. Sabine's family being wiped out on mandalore... I don't know why it took me so long to piece that together that yeah... they probably died. I guess I assumed people kind of just left after the siege but it was intact then and.... can't tall forever moving on

5. It was a violation for that trooper to just pluck Sabine's helmet off her head like that. A disgrace to the way. I'm a little shocked her helmet doesn't seal? I thought most of them did but what do I know

6. Yaya new kanan inspired lightsaber for Ezra just dropped.

7. Force sensitive Sabine. I have mixed thoughts on this but it was awfully convienient

8. I would love if Ahsoka just dual wielded one lightsaber and then Morgan's sword I think it was such a badass as thing for them to do a real win for the gays

9. Ahsoka being afraid of being left alone to die... just think about how many times that thought has crossed her mind. ESPECIALLY with the "all your friends are dead" line.

10. Baylan you SOB. Get your ass back here and stop cosplaying force daddy. Shin needs you. Also, highly sus by the way. But could be cool if it ever leads to a baylan, ahsoka and whoever the "son" will be trio eventually.

11. Manifesting the purrgils return to come save our girlie pops. Really thought that's what the hole in the sky was for.

12. I see u. I see u Dave with the whole "shadows in the stars" thing. I see anakin. And as much as I love the idea of him watching over ahsoka, I also don't like it because he's probably teaching her to be a force ghost which sets her up to die i am weary

13. Ezra not taking off the stormtroopers costume before dropping in on a republic ship is the most Ezra thing ever what a mad lad. Also, go hug your mom bro

14. I don't like them being left behind. But there is something to be said about the possibility of wolfwren now

15. Ahsoka fearing Sabine would turn to the darkside because she experienced loss is such a real reaction for her. She's seen what loss can do to a person

16. Um what was that cargo? Were those bodies in caskets. Clones? Dathomir stuff? I'm not sure but I don't like it

17. They better find their way home in the first episode of season 2 I need this rebels reunion ASAP stop holding out on me filoni

[quibbs126]

Alright, this might take some explaining, but basically this is just like an idea for an au I had based on my friend’s description of the premise of a show she and her mom are watching that I just decided I need to cross over with Cookie Run. Also I liked the premise

I’ll give you the rundown of what she told me right quick. Oh, also disclaimer, I don’t actually know what the show is called, nor do I know the names of any of the characters, since she didn’t tell me, as well as I believe the fact that she didn’t know how to translate the names into English

So basically, our main character is this prince who got exiled from his kingdom for being part of a rebellion. On his way leaving the kingdom, he gets accosted and loses all his magical items (I’m guessing the kingdom was either magic or divine in some way, I don’t remember if she explained), and basically is now stuck at the level of a normal person. So the prince ends up opening an inn in the mountains. Business isn’t the best but he’s getting by. Anyways, one day, a group of thugs comes in and basically demands the prince (he’s hiding his identity so no one knows he’s a prince and think he’s a regular dude, but I don’t know his name, so I’m calling just him that) lets them stay in his rooms, feed them breakfast (and I assume dinner) and basically do their bidding or they take him out. The prince says something along the lines of “you aren’t even worth a single thread on my jacket” and basically refuses. The thugs attack but it just so happens another traveler was at the inn at the time, and they use their martial arts to take out all the thugs, though in the process the inn gets destroyed. The traveler basically says their work here is done, but the prince is like “um no, you destroyed my inn! I can’t pay to have all this repaired, I don’t have that kind of money! You gotta pay for all of this!”. Now see, the traveler is going to this special tower (I think there might have been a tournament there?) which has something at the end of it. We don’t know what the traveler wants from the tower, but they want something. The traveler says to the prince that they’re going to this tower for a tournament and there will be a monetary reward, and once they win they’ll pay the prince back. The prince decides that they’ll go along, saying it’s to make sure they’ll actually keep their word and not run out on their debt (though my friend said that the traveler’s martial art school was known to be reliable and trustworthy, so he could trust them, it was for some other reason that they decided to join that I can’t remember). So yeah, the two set out towards this tower

And so yeah, in my brain as she was explaining this, I was connecting this to Dark Choco, and here we are. So in this au, Dark Choco takes the role of the prince (unsurprisingly), where after his banishment and losing all his stuff (I’m assuming that includes the Strawberry Jam Sword), he sets up an inn somewhere and one day meets a traveler by the name of Peach Cookie, and after an altercation that leaves his inn trashed, Peach promises to pay him back with money from this tournament at a tower (the only tower I know is the Tower of Frozen Waves, so maybe it’s there? But I don’t know much about that tower either), and Dark Choco, a bit suspicious, goes along with her, and they’re off on an adventure together towards this tower

Oh, or maybe this tournament has to do with that competition mentioned in Tiger Lily’s Golden Warrior costume? The one about the Temple in the Sky? Maybe it could be that instead, so it ties in more with actual Cookie Run stuff

Oh and as for the designs, I just wanted them to wear less conspicuous things (also Dark Choco might have lost his armor so he just has regular clothes), since I imagine they’re trying to keep a low profile. But maybe I should have drawn Peach Cookie in her normal outfit, that probably still would have worked. Unless au things change her backstory or something, I haven’t worked it out

I don’t know where this would go, but I thought the premise was neat and wanted to draw it. Also I just kind of want to see these two interact

Anyways yeah, I hope you enjoy the idea at least, even if there’s not much to look at

Edit: The show is called The Blood of Youth

[denimbex1986]

"I think "Power of Love." I know it's the anthem of the film but like, the ballsiness of Andrew Haigh to put that right at the end - it's such a hopefully iconic, music, like needle drop..."

"And he's reinterpreted that song in a way that people go - somebody just said that they, since they saw the film last night, they've just been playing it on a loop, so I think when you get a, a song that you think you know and then you have a new, a profound appreciation for it, I think that's amazing. I do think "Death of a Party", like, that's a - and I'm a huge Pet Shop Boys fan as well."

"Beach Boys -"

"Yeah. Huge Beach Boys fan. Um: 'I'm thinking of - ' No, um, so uh, I love, I love the fact that "Always on My Mind" is on there too."

"I have, I have, I have one and I need to - I think it's something I would enjoy, is like really going out and hunting down records..."

"Oh yeah, yeah there should be."

"Yeah, there should be. I don't know, we're not in charge of that..."

"Are you talking about Billie Eilish? Yeah. Yeah, so in Sherlock, I had this line which is, uh: 'Honey, you should see me in a crown.' Uh, I said that to Benedict who was playing Sherlock obviously, and so uh, Billie was uh, big into the show and then she wrote her, her amazing song - it's such a great tune. So yeah, that I think, that, that is, I think that is true."

"Yeah, we met at the, at the Golden Globes, yeah, we had a fantastic time. What did we speak about? I don't know if we should tell you - we, we didn't talk about Sherlock."

"I did know that. I have seen them."

"I sent him the - he was the first person I sent the picture to, obviously. No, but imagine you just like, I never sent you that picture and you just saw, like, it would be weird not to like message your friend: 'Hey, I went for you as Halloween and never told you.' Bit creepy. But of course, that is not Andrew, that is a character that he has played, right?"

"Next year you should dress up as me. What would you dress up as? What would you wear?"

"A lovely little knit."

"Fucking hell. Lovely little knit."

"Um, I think probably I'll, I'll - I, I'll forecast because I've seen some pictures from the Gladiator set, so I'll wear some of his costumes I've seen from that."

"Well I, but when we met, he would be like a psychic, because when we first met you would have no idea that - I didn't even know that was going to be - "

"Oh, I knew."

"You knew. The minute I met him - Gladiator."

"Great with a shield. Big massive tiger or whatever..."

"I have, yeah."

"Have you?"

"I swear to God. There's a - there's a hotel in Sligo; it's; I can't remember, I think it's a Clarion, and I went there - I'm going to tell this as quickly as possible. Me and my brother went there, were about 12, Donnacha was 10. We were in this hotel, the door was propped open, we heard this whistling - swear to God - we heard this whistling, we were watching like the SpongeBob movie and we stopped for a second. The whistling got really loud and then the, the chair that was propping the door open flew into the bedroom, slammed shut. Me and Donnacha were screaming at the top of our lungs; my mum was in the next room, she couldn't hear us. Then - "

"How old were you?"

"I was 12, Donnacha was about 10."

"We wake up the next morning and we find out that the hotel was an old like uh, mental asylum, where lots of dark stuff happened. I don't like necessarily believe in ghosts, but what happened in that room was weird and kind of unexplainable."

[queen-of-deans-booty]

LARP and the Real Girl: Part Two

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.2k

Warnings: canon angst and violence

Author’s Note: I am so sorry I haven’t posted. I was sick with the flu and completely forgot about it. I will be posted both episodes now!

I do not own anything from Supernatural. All credit goes to their respective owners. Any and all comments on these are appreciated.

LARPing is nothing like you ever expected. You thought there would be a few people in costumes fighting it out with wooden swords, but this is a whole community of people. There are tents set up, props of all kinds scattered throughout the area, and everyone either in character or off to the side taking a break.

You've never felt so out of place than right here.

Joanna is holding onto your hand and walks next to you. You don't want her going anywhere that's not by your side because no matter how innocent this may seem, it's all very creepy to you. Still, Charlie is here somewhere, and you need to talk to her. Maybe she can help you or maybe she has no clue what's going on, but you won't know until you talk to her.

Renaissance music plays at this medieval-like camp. People in costumes pretend to fight with mock weapons, a woman plays a harp, and many others talk and stroll outside tents. Colorful banners bear various crests and signs point the way to the dungeon, privies and stockade. A large banner reads "Moondoor: The Battle of Kingdoms" right as you walk in.

You come across a scene where a man with large fake ears and comedic bad teeth that you'd find at the dollar store. This man's head is in a wooden pillory, but it's not locked since this is all pretend. There is another man standing off to the side, and they talk to each other as if they are the characters they play.

"I, Boltar the Furious," the man outside the pillory says, "bind you to this stock so that all of Moondoor may see you for what you are: a thief."

"My Shadow Orc brethren will descend from the Black Hills and the tents of Moo–" The man inside the pillory pauses when his teeth fall out of his mouth.

"Uh, hold!" Boltar says.

Everyone around them relax and begin talking to themselves since they are pausing their role-playing. Boltar picks up the fallen teeth and wipes them on his clothes before placing them back into the Orc's mouth.

"Thanks, Gerry. Sorry," he says to Boltar.

"Yeah, no problem, Monty," he nods.

Once Monty fels the teeth won't fall out again, he nods to Gerry who resumes the role-playing. Everyone stops talking and snaps back into character.

"Resume!"

"And the tents of Moondoor will be bathed in blood as we unseat the queen of the Moons from the throne she stole from the rightful heir--the Shadow King. And you--"

Gerry throws a red bean bag at Monty's forehead.

"Silentium! Serve your time with honor, heathen. If you need to use the chamber pot, stomp your feet thrice."

Gery walks away, and you stare at Monty with a weird look on your face. Gerry walks past Sam and Dean, but the older Winchester stops him.

"Excuse me. Hi. You are a LARPer, yeah?"

"I prefer the term 'interactive literaturist'."

"Right. I am Special Agent Rosewood. This is Special Agent Taggart and Fry."

You three hold up your badges, and he does something that shocks you, but it doesn't seem to phase him in the slightest.

"Hold!" He puts down the hood of his costume and speaks with his everyday voice instead of his character's voice. "Um, guys, we're not doing the whole genre-mash-up thing this weekend. We only do that every third month."

"Excuse me?" you ask.

"Your fake badges and the cheap suits? It's very cool. I get it. Your characters are FBI agents that somehow traveled to Moondoor, but I'm telling you it's straight-up Moondoor this weekend."

"These aren't fake badges," Sam says.

"Yeah, they are," Gerry chuckles and grabs Sam's badge to look at it. "They're very good, but the ID number shifted to ten digits with two letters mixed in at the end of the year. The seal's from last month. It's really good work." He hands Sam his badge, and the younger Winchester quickly puts it back in his pocket. "There's a tournament this weekend, so you have to follow the rules. If there's no rules, there's chaos." He puts his hood back up and resumes the roleplay. "Resume. If you would like to join the army of Moons, the queen is always on the lookout for new squires."

"Yes. Right. Uh, we would like to see your queen now, please," Dean says, going along with his game.

"Well, the queen's calendar is booked months in advance. If you wish to witness what's in store for you in her army, her highness is overseeing new squires on the pitch as we speak."

He leads you three further into the park where there is a fight going on with fake swords. You really want to get the hell out of here, but you have a job to do, so you can't leave just yet. Your lower back is killing you the more you're on your feet, but you ignore it as much as you can.

In the middle of a gathering, there are two sword fighters wearing helmets and shiny armor. The sword of the first looks somewhat realistic while the sword of the second is wrapped in yellow foam. They fight for ten more seconds before the first one overpowers the second. The second sword fighter falls to their knees and surrenders.

"Yield! I yield!"

The sword fighter with the realistic sword takes off the helmet, and your eyes widen when you see that it's Charlie. The crowd applauses her win, but she doesn't bask in the glory for long.

"I love you," the man on his knees says.

"I know. Take your leave to my medical tent and attend to your... severed limbs."

The man gets up and leaves, and Charlie addresses the crowd, not having seen you or the brothers yet.

"Greyfox and Thargrim are missing. We pray to the Goddess that they have not fallen victim to foul play. In their absence, the honor guard's ranks are weakened. To join--" She falls quiet when she locks eyes with you, then Sam and then Dean. She knows trouble is here if you three are here, and she gulps visibly. "The queen needs some royal 'me' time. Talk amongst thyselves."

She walks briskly into her tent, and you three follow her. Dean passes by the fallen yellow foam sword and picks it up, admiring the quality of it.

"Nice balance," he chuckles.

"Dean."

"Yeah," he nods and jogs to catch up with you.

Charlie is packing her things into a bag knowing that she doesn't want to be here anymore. You're happy to see her, but she clearly isn't happy to see you three. You let go of Joanna's hand, and she runs over to the large bed and climbs on top of it where she is content playing with her toys. The tent is decorated with a rug, some small statues, lanterns, and a table with fancy chairs. A map with figurines positioned on it is on a second table. It must be her map of the land she is role-playing in.

"Charlie," you begin, but she cuts you off.

"Charlie Bradbury is dead. She died a year ago. You three killed her. My name is Carrie Heinlein. Oh, and guess what? Now you killed her, too."

"Okay, listen--"

"No, I buried myself. Then Dick Roman went down, his company belly-up, and I figured everything was okay. I got my life back. Now you're here, and if you guys are here, monsters are here. Why do I have such bad luck? What am I, some kind of monster magnet? Is there such a thing as a monster magnet?" She looks at you three with wide eyes, but as soon as Dean goes to say something, she quickly shakes her head. "You know what? Don't answer that. I don't care. What I care about is not getting my other arm broken or dying. So, I'm dropping my sword and walking off the stage, bitches." She walks to the front of the tent and places a crown on Dean's head to signal that she is done. "Have fun storming the castle."

"Charlie!" you say urgently, causing her to halt. "Greyfox and Thargrim or Ed and Lance, they're not missing. They're dead."

"What? H-How?"

"Ed was dismembered in his own home, and Lance coughed up a lung inside a locked interrogation room."

"Drawn and quartered and bleeding out? Please stop talking again," she sighs. She walks back into the tent and sets her things down to process this. "So, what do you think did this?"

"Well, aside from this mark on their bodies," you slide her a picture of the black tree symbol, "and that they're both LARPers, there's not much to go on."

"Wait, I've seen this before. It's a Celtic magic symbol. At least it was in my favorite video game. Does that help? Can I go now?" she says hopefully.

"It's a start, but no. What can you tell us about Ed and Lance?"

"They're good guys. Two of the best members of the queen's ever-shrinking army."

"Ever-shrinking?"

"My kingdom has had a lot of bad luck lately, probably because of me, but maybe it's tied to this mark. A month ago, one of my guys had both her ankles broken before battle. Before that, I had three people who had hospital-worthy accidents while at home. You think there's any connection there?"

"Did they have any enemies in common?"

"In real life? No. Everyone gets along famously. In the game, though, that's a different story."

She gets up and walks over to the table with the map. It's of Moondoor, and upon it are different-colored figurines representing different armies.

"They had tons of enemies. Red represents the followers of the Moon--my peeps. Green's for Elves, blue's for Warriors of Yesteryear, and black's for Shadow Orcs. They're total d-bags. This weekend is the Battle of the Kingdoms to see who wears the Forever Crown. This weekend, each faction is definitely an enemy of me and mine."

"You know, if you move your archers back and you're broadswords men to the west--"

"They can fight the warriors," Charlie finishes for Dean. It's weird to see Dean like this, especially when he hasn't shown any interest in this kind of thing before. "Hey, good call. What about the southern wall?"

"Okay, can we focus?" you ask and Dean snaps back into reality.

"Yeah? Right. Sorry."

"So, maybe someone from one of the other kingdoms got a hold of real magic and started using it to weaken your army," Sam theorizes.

As he is talking, Dean picks up a trebuchet figurine and moves it to a different position on the map. He and Charlie make eye contact, and they both nod when they agree that it's the best position for this kind of thing.

"Why not just come after me? Why the escalation?" Charlie sighs.

"We should canvas the kingdoms," you state. "You should get out of here. You don't want to get hurt again."

"Whoa, wait. Charlie knows Moondoor a lot better than we do. We need her," Sam says.

"Sam, I think we can take care of a bunch of accountants with foam swords," Dean scoffs.

"We need all the help we can get, Dean. People are dying."

"Our point, which is usually yours, is that she should get somewhere safe and get back to a normal life."

"Hey, I am right here, and I want to leave," Charlie says, but the queen has to stay. I mean, Sam is right. People are dying. That can't happen on my watch. You know what? I am tired of running. I like my life here. I'm gonna stay and fight for it."

"How can I say no to that?" you chuckle.

Sam's phone rings and he answers it, quickly hanging up once he got what he needed.

"So, the toxicology report came back on Lance. Nothing, but the medical examiner said his body showed clear signs that he was killed by Belladonna."

"The porn star?" Charlie and Dean speak at the same time.

You roll your eyes and take a seat since your back is killing you again.

"The poison. However, they couldn't find a trace of it in his system."

"Just like they couldn't find ropes in Ed's apartment."

"Charlie, I'm gonna need to borrow your laptop," Sam says.

"There are no laptops in Moondoor. There are rules, but there is a tech tent four tents down."

"Okay. How about you three go canvas, and I'll dig into these accidents and this mark?"

"Take Joanna with you, please," you say.

Joanna raises her arms when Sam approaches her, and he scoops her into his arms. They both leave, leaving you and Dean alone with Charlie.

"Okay. I'm gonna need the full wiki on where you guys have been. But first, you're gonna have to ditch the suit if you're gonna walk and talk with the queen."

She digs into her closet and hands Dean some clothes to wear, and you spread your arms as if to say, "what about me?"

"What am I supposed to wear? You got anything for a pregnant woman who is six months along?"

Charlie produces a beautiful yet plain red dress that goes all the way down to your feet. You quickly change into it without any problem, but Dean takes longer since he has armor and other things attached to his costume. When you're done, you sit back down at the table and watch Dean with a certain kind of glint in your eyes.

"Damn, how can you make even this look hot?"

"It doesn't take much, sweetheart," he smirks.

"I got a little wet, to be honest," you chuckle, but the smirk doesn't lift from his face.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[misiwrites]

Mayblade Day 8

[previous: chapter 1 & 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4 | chapter 5 | chapter 6 | chapter 7]

CHAPTER 8 prompt: glitter characters: hiromi, tsuki pairings: ---

The next day, an information newsletter about the bake sale event popped up in Hiromi’s school email. The message contained a tentative list of people to be involved in the preparations so far, not by names but with a mention of one vendor from each first-year class – the 1-A vendor being Hiromi, and she didn’t know who the rest were – as well as live performances by the circus and band clubs. There’s a circus club? she wondered. It’s not a euphemism for the Shell Killers, is it?

There was also a request, at the end of the message, for the event participants to drop by the crafts & cooking club for measurements.

Hiromi blinked. She re-read the line. Nope, didn’t make any more sense the second time. What measurements was this speaking of? And crafts & cooking club? Really? These clubs were starting to get weird at this point.

Nevertheless, this so-called C&C was operating in the textile crafts class, and the ever-so-diligent Hiromi made her way there first thing after classes. The classroom was in the cellar floor, and descending the stairs for the first time in weeks struck her with a momentary, fleeting yearning for all the times she’d gone down there for her and Emily’s paint-reeking astrology club sessions.

She sniffed. Then scrunched up her nose. Never mind – actually, she hadn’t missed the odors all that much.

When she entered the crafts class, she was greeted by a whopping crowd of one whole person. Calling it “greeting” was also a stretch, because this sole person was too engrossed in cutting some fabric on the floor, surrounded by a sea of pastel cloth oozing all around them, to notice her entering.

Hiromi cleared her throat, rousing the person from their concentration. She had most definitely never seen this one before: a wild hair of half blue, half purple; red, scar-like streaks across the eyes; and an outfit that she could only have described as reminiscent of edgy goth fashion from two decades ago. She had no idea what she was even looking at right now.

“Um,” she began. “I’m here for the bake sale preparations?” The intonation of her utterance turned into a question, the whole scene in front of her too absurd for absolutes.

The person on the floor raised their yellow eyes at her. “Oh! I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you!” They dropped the scissors and sprang up in all their J-rock-esque glory. “You came for the measurements, right?”

“I guess? What kind of measurements are we even talking about here? I was only asked to become a vendor yesterday.”

“That’s fine, I’ll just take your measurements for the costume. All the class vendors will wear matching clothing, that’s why.” With that, they grabbed a tape measure off the messy floor.

This was when it finally clicked for Hiromi. “Oh, your club is sewing outfits for the bake sale?” Frankly, it hadn’t even crossed her mind that it was going to be a costume party, let alone that the costumes would be made by students.

“Yeah – or, well, I am. Could you raise your arms? A bit higher, yes, that’s enough.”

“You are?” Hiromi repeated while this flamboyant gothic scarecrow was working the measure on her torso with the ease of someone who did this all day long.

“I do all the outfits.”

“All alone?!”

“Yeah, or with one other person – if he shows up. Either way, it will get a bit busy. But I’ll manage. The dress is going to look fantastic on you, you’re so small and cute. The name is Tsuki, by the way.” No more than a few quick rounds of tape measure around and along Hiromi’s upper body and they were already done, lightning fast. Tsuki proceeded to scribble the numbers down in a notebook from memory.

“I’m Hiromi. You’re seriously making outfits for all the bake sale participants? Isn’t there anyone else in this club?”

“Well, there is, but…” Tsuki screwed their neck right and looked across the classroom; Hiromi followed their gaze and saw a red velvet curtain partitioning the far back corner of the room. She hadn’t had any textile crafts classes yet, she’d picked the woodwork elective instead, so the space was unfamiliar to her. “We don’t really, um, get along, so he’s focusing on other things.”

“And that’s it? Are there only two people in this club?”

“Three, actually, though even that is a bit… I mean, I wanted to join a crafts club and this other guy wanted a cooking club, but there were no other members for either at the time, so we agreed to use a joint space. That over there is his part of the club.” While talking, Tsuki had swiftly begun working on the pattern for Hiromi’s up-coming outfit. She was beginning to see why producing all the outfits was no big deal for this person.

How absurd, to combine two completely random clubs because neither had any members. Hiromi was rather glad that no such thing had been suggested for the astrology club, for she couldn’t have imagined herself in charge of something like an astrology & acting club – or astrology & anime? Astrology & acroyoga?

“Sorry, but that sounds incredibly stupid,” she couldn’t help commenting. Promptly, she made her way across the room to see this mysterious curtain-clad corner. “And who is this douche refusing to cooperate with you, anyway?”

“Olivier Bohringer from 1-A.”

“Ah. That explains it.” The green-haired snob from her class. Knowing that this was the rich boy’s lair, tossing that curtain aside felt like a felony of some sort.

She did it anyway, indeed revealing a miniature kitchen hidden in the back of the textile crafts room. Well, it looked inoffensive enough, not very secretive at all; the strangest part was an unnecessarily large copy of the Raft of Medusa adorning a wall, a poster set in comically large, gilded frames next to the portable stove. This backdrop made no sense to her, but perhaps it made perfect sense to Olivier. To pretend that his make-shift kitchen in a random classroom was a miniature Louvre or whatever.

This corner was also inexplicably clean compared to the chaos of Tsuki’s side of the textiles room. The only thing out of order was a stack of something on the floor, and Hiromi quickly realized she knew what it was, for she’d seen these things in passing in the 1-A homeroom many times. They were bars of chocolate. She’d seen these square packages appear on Olivier’s desk seemingly out of nowhere, and now a whole stack of unopened ones sat here in the corner of this classroom. Knowing the boy’s tastes, it must have been some rare brand that cost a fortune, but for some god-forsaken reason, each and every bar came with a tacky sticker slapped on top. Obviously added after purchasing the chocolates, most of the stickers were all jazzy and colorful in all shades of the rainbow and featured random and mostly utterly idiotic words that Hiromi could only assume were intended to be pick-up lines.

The sticker gracing the otherwise dark square slab sitting atop the stack that she was now critically staring down at said: “Here I am! What are your other 2 wishes?”

Hiromi quietly pulled the curtain back in place. She felt a headache coming. This had been enough weird for one day; she chose to ignore having ever witnessed this nonsense.

“Do you want to know what the vendor’s outfits are going to look like once finished?” Tsuki asked her from the other side of the room. They’d calmly carried on working the patterns, not moving from their workstation.

“Yeah, of course.” Realizing only now how silly it had been to not inquire what she’d be putting on in the first place, she returned to the handicraft genius who whipped out a sketch of the costume to come.

Like most students, Hiromi had her own locker at school. It was located at the very end of the main corridor on the ground floor, behind a door that led to some bathrooms and a cleaning closet. It was a nook that nobody visited by accident.

One morning, as usual, she pushed the unnecessarily weighty door open to access her locker. She habitually carried library books in her backpack, and to avoid making the bag too heavy, she fetched the day’s school textbooks from the locker instead. She always finished her homework at school, rendering it unnecessary to carry any textbooks home at the end of the day – unless the exam week was coming up, which it would in a month’s time. Then she’d take her books to revise everything at home.

She pried the locker door open with the small key attached. She’d never bothered locking it; nothing worth stealing about the same old textbooks everyone else in the school used. Expecting nothing but the usual stack inside, what she saw first thing this time gave her pause. There was an envelope on top of her books.

What the…? She grabbed the intruding object, frowning. It was pink with a streak of glitter across and had nothing written on it. She pulled a piece of paper out.

The letter, if it could be called that, contained exactly one sentence. Come behind the minigolf booth at noon on Saturday. That’s it. She didn’t recognize the ugly handwriting, there was no signature anywhere, nothing.

She did know one minigolf booth, at the park she’d been walking her dog recently. This sounded like a vague threat, or maybe just an odd invitation – to do minigolf? Golf wasn’t very threatening. And who would leave such a message here?

Hiromi crumpled the paper and stuck it in her pocket, wondering whether it would be wise to tell anyone about it or not. Bored teenagers spread gossip like wildfire in this school.

[luciferfemme]

Lovebirds - 1-

A/N: So I intended for this just to be a horny one-off but now I'm having IDEAS... so um yeah... lol also no smut this chapter however this is gonna have more parts. For anyone who wants like a tropes rundown... we got pining, protective, oblivious characters (will update as I write more).

A quick warning that while nothing happens there is a gross drunk creep for a scene here so just a heads up.

----

“What am I even doing here?” Cassie wondered to herself. She had been at the bar for all of ten minutes and already she was second-guessing all of her life choices that had led to this moment. What had possessed her to even come here in the first place? She didn’t even drink. She had spent the last five minutes avoiding eye contact with the bartender while she tried to think of some kind of drink to ask for that she could just hold for the remainder of the night. She would take casual, polite sips but she had no intention of finishing anything.

If she were honest with herself, Cassie would admit she knew exactly why she had come to this particular bar on this particular night; she had overheard Jack and a few other members of the theater crew talking about hanging out here. The bar was close enough to the dorms that most everyone could walk here and back without any trouble. As such it was a fairly popular hangout for a wide swath of the university's population. Including some of the faculty.

If she thought about it, being at a bar was kind of like playing a character. She was a theater major after all, and she was damn good at acting if she did say so herself. Surely she could play the part of someone who was confident enough to enjoy drinking and going out to bars. She just needed to embrace her fun-loving side. An alter ego she liked to call Cas. Sucking in a deep breath she closed her eyes for just a moment to center herself. Just as she always did when preparing for a role. You can do this Cassie, she told herself. You can act your ass off. You are that girl who loves to party and hang out with the crew and drink beer. She opened her eyes a moment later to find a man had taken the seat at the bar beside her suddenly. Inwardly Cassie frowned at his presence but schooled her face into an indifferent expression. 

“Buy you a drink?” The man asked. If she had to guess Cassie would say he was drunk enough already. He smelled of hard liquor and had a bit of a five o’clock shadow. He didn’t look like a college student, but he did look like the sort of guy that would ply college girls with alcohol hoping to get them home with him. She shuddered at the thought. 

“No thanks,” she replied. She had said it as kindly as she could and she hoped with enough force to make it stick. The man however looked thoroughly annoyed at this rejection. 

“I’m trying to be nice here you don’t have to be such a stuck-up bitch about it,” he said. "You should be grateful I'm giving you attention at all."

Cassie flinched, theater training or not, a drunk guy at a bar who was twice her size and twice her age made her nervous. This was a bad idea, she thought to herself. 

“Hey! The lady said fuck off so why don’t you take a hike!” Said a familiar voice from behind her. She knew without turning around that it was Jack. She couldn’t help but feel relieved. 

“What’s it to you, dy…” he hiccoughed, cutting off the word on his lips that Cassie was all too grateful he hadn’t been able to finish. 

“You wanna try that again?” Jack asked. The man got to his feet as if to strike, then promptly tripped over his own feet, or perhaps the barstool, and fell to the floor in a heap. The bar at large cheered. Jack smiled and it was all Cassie could do not to blush at the sight of her bright and warm smile. Jack was the theater department’s sound and lighting tech, though she liked to help out wherever she was needed. On one memorable occasion during a performance of Othello, Jack had even helped Cassie out of one of her costumes for a quick change. Her fingers had made such quick work of her zipper, and she’d all but ripped the costume right off her body that Cassie’s breath had caught. By the time she came back to herself, she was already zipped up into the next outfit and Jack had placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and whispered to her to break a leg, and then she was back on stage. 

At first, Cassie had managed to convince herself that she was simply just a fan of Jack’s work and dedication. After all, she was a hell of a light tech, she always made sure the spotlight was en pointe and her sound cues were immaculate. To say nothing of her backstage work. But after the quick change experience in which Cassie had nearly flubbed a line immediately after, and she still thought about that moment and Jack’s whisper in her ear and her warm breath ghosting over her flesh almost nightly. She had to admit that it was a little more than simply being a fan of her professional talents.

It was almost embarrassing, and worse still Jack seemingly hadn’t been affected at all by the interaction. She supposed that made sense, after all, Jack was nothing if not just as dedicated and professional as she herself was. And yet to see her now, standing there like a knight in shining armor who had just rescued her from an ogre, she couldn’t help but feel a little weak in the knees. 

“You alright?” Jack asked. 

“Perfectly fine,” Cassie replied a little more breathlessly than she’d intended. 

Jack smiled, a bright, warm smile that made Cassie’s heart flutter and her breath catch, “T-thanks by the way,” Cassie said. 

Jack smiled, “Don’t mention it. Meanwhile how about we get out of here? You don’t really seem like the bar type.” Cassie wanted to ask what type she did seem like, only Jack held out her hand to her and suddenly all thoughts vanished from her mind. Cassie stared at her hand for an uncomfortably long time. It doesn’t mean anything, she told herself, taking Jack’s outstretched hand and letting her maneuver her out of the bar. Jack’s free hand slipped around her waist to the small of her back and it was all Cassie could do not to fall over then and there. She was fairly certain Jack’s hand on her back was the only thing keeping her from floating away at present. The bar felt hot and confined and Cassie felt as though it might be spinning but she never wanted Jack to let her go. 

To her dismay, however, the moment they reached the outside of the bar Jack’s hand vanished from the small of her back. Cassie frowned despite herself. A breeze whipped up the street and a chill ran through her. She hadn’t realized how cold it was until then. It certainly hadn't been this cold when she'd walked into the bar she thought. Noticing her shiver, Jack took off her leather jacket without a word and wrapped it around Cassie’s shoulders. 

Cassie blushed. “Thanks,” she said. The scent of the other woman filled her nostrils. A mix of tobacco, cologne, and something that seemed uniquely Jack. She shivered, trying not to look obvious that she was enjoying the scent of the jacket wrapped around her. Jack ran a hand through messy brown curls, then unfolded a section of shirt sleeve and pulled out a pack of cigarettes that were hiding there. Cassie watched in rapt fascination as she removed a silver Zippo from her pocket, struck it across her thigh, and ignited the cigarette at her lips before flicking the lighter shut with one hand and slipping it back into her pocket. The whole thing took only a few seconds but it had been dazzling to watch, like some sort of intricate ballet. She felt as though she should applaud, but that seemed like an odd sort of thing to do so instead she forced herself to look away as Jack inhaled from her cigarette and let out a long sigh a moment later. Cassie felt herself flush at the noise, it had sounded almost sexual in nature and she couldn’t help letting her mind wander at the thought. Unbidden her mind was flooded with images of Jack’s lips on other parts of her body instead of the cigarette and perhaps even her own lips on Jack’s body, sighs of pleasure escaping them both. 

“You alright there?” Jack asked, stretching and cracking her knuckles as the cigarette dangled loosely from her lips. Cassie was half tempted to take it, from her, imagining how a character might do that sort of thing, but she didn’t. Instead, she stood there awkwardly, and nodded in response, willing herself to snap out of it.

“I’m fine,” Cassie lied with her own smile. 

Jack smiled back, another one of those killer smiles that made Cassie feel like she might float away on a cloud. “Glad to hear it,” she said. 

“Thank you, by the way… you know for rescuing me.” 

Jack smirked, “You already thanked me back in the bar silly,” she said. 

“Oh did I?” Idiot! Cassie hissed at herself. Why am I so clueless around her? 

“It’s fine. It was kind of a hectic moment. Easy enough to forget.” 

“Yeah.” One of the many things Cassie admired about Jack was just how easygoing she was. Nothing seemed to phase her or rattle her. Ever. Even when she was about to kick some guy's ass in a bar she had been calm. Like it was just another weekday thing. Perhaps it was for her, Cassie thought.

“So. You hungry? I know this great little cafe down the corner. Or if you’d like we can just grab some coffee or tea or something,” Jack offered. 

Cassie wanted so badly to say yes, please, any of it, all of it. Let’s spend the rest of time together. But she couldn’t. Her crush had grown by leaps and bounds just in the last few minutes alone and she was afraid that if she agreed to what felt like a date with her it would only worsen the situation. Especially when she knew it wasn’t. Jack was just being nice. 

“That’s sweet, but I should really get back to my dorm. You know gotta study up on my lines,” Cassie replied. The moment the words had left her lips she felt like a complete and utter moron. She may have been a great actor but she was an inexplicably bad liar. Especially when she was lying to someone she cared about and didn’t want to be lying to in the first place. Jack’s face fell, but she nodded all the same. 

“Well if you ever need help I’d be happy to run lines with you,” Jack offered.

Cassie nodded, before she could stop herself she had replied. “I’d like that.” 

Jack beamed at that, and Cassie couldn’t help but feel like she was staring into the sun itself when Jack smiled. “Do you mind if I walk you to your dorm? I know it’s just up the street but it’s not very safe at this time of night.” 

Cassie blushed but nodded all the same. Jack finished off her cigarette and crushed it into the pavement with the toe of her black leather boot. Cassie swallowed. The two of them made their way down the street towards the dorm, side by side, neither one saying much. She couldn’t help but wish Jack’s hand was back on her lower back as they walked but she knew that was asking for too much. Jack had only done that to help her out of the bar. It had been a friendly gesture, not a romantic one, she reminded herself. 

Her dorm appeared far too soon for her liking, and the two of them came to a stop in front of it. “Well this is me,” she said. 

“Thank you for letting me walk you home. I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if something had happened to you.” 

Cassie couldn’t help but smile at that. “Thank you, I’d hate for that creep to wake up and try and hit on me again or worse try to start a fight.” 

“I can take him.” Take me, take me, take me. Cassie thought.

“Of that, I have no doubt," she replied.

“I took boxing in high school.” 

“Your school let you do that?” Cassie asked surprised. 

“No I took it at a gym by my house. My dad was insistent that I had to be able to defend myself and he was right for it.” 

Cassie couldn’t help but smile. “He seems like he was a good dad then at least?” 

“Oh yeah. He did the best he could for me and my younger brother. It wasn’t easy but… he basically got to raise two boys was how he saw it,” at this Jack laughed. A warm laugh that made Cassie want to laugh herself. A silence fell between them after that and Cassie knew this was it. If she doesn’t kiss you now she's absolutely unquestionably not into you, she thought. Jack scratched the back of her neck. 

“I should probably get back. Don’t want dad to worry about me,” she said. “See you tomorrow for class though right?” 

Cassie felt her heart shatter, but she did her best to channel her alter ego, Cas the girl who partied and was definitely chill and not at all heartbroken. “I’ll be there,” she said. 

“I’ll grab us some coffee. I know how rough seven a.m. classes can be on you. Anything you prefer?” 

“I’m good with whatever,” Cassie said. 

Jack nodded and smiled. “Sounds good.” 

Cassie forced a fake smile, turned on her heel, and made her way through the door and down the hall towards the elevator, willing herself to at least get to her room before she cried. She could feel the burn of unshed tears at the corners of her eyes. The elevator doors slid open and Cassie stepped inside. She could still smell Jack’s cologne lingering in her nose. It was then that she realized she was still wearing her leather jacket. But before she could stop to give it back, the elevator doors had closed, and Jack had vanished from view.

[snowbatsims]

VAMPIRE INTERMISSION #4

It's Rune's birthday today!

At least, according to the in-game calendar, where I once gave my vampires birth dates that remain consistent every year. No aging will be occurring, due to the whole vampire thing, but yeah.

It sure is Rune's birthday.

MORTEN: You know... I think we should throw him a little surprise party this year. EINARR: Oh, Rune? Sure. EINARR: I don't know exactly how birthday parties really work, so I'll leave you to it. MORTEN: hell yeah

And the decorations are up!

While waiting for the day to pass, they put on a movie: Moonlight Massacre III.

Einarr picked it this time. He has never seen it before, and honestly, Morten hasn't either. Not this one, anyway.

It was kind of... hmm.

character 1: oh, i can't wait to go camping in the woods with you guys today! :D character 2: ooooh but watch out......... isn't this where they said there would be... WEREWOLVES??? character 3: psssht, werewolves aren't real! we'll be fine ♡ character 1: yeah!! :D character 2: eh idk... i'd rather be safe than sorry. character 3: lmao coward ♡ 1 and 3: *laugh* character 2: wha- hey! wait for me!!

EINARR: They're all about to die. MORTEN: I mean that would make sense, it's called Moonlight Massacre after all. EINARR: And it'll definitely be to werewolves, which happen to be real in their world too, much like in ours. Calling it. MORTEN: Yeah... there have been werewolves in this series before. Wouldn't surprise me.

MORTEN: ...Wait, did you just say they were real?

EINARR: Well of course! If immortal bat-shifting blood-drinkers like ourselves exist, why wouldn't some people who turn into a wolf at the full moon exist too? EINARR: Some even claim we're two sides of the same coin, though I haven't truly fact-checked that. EINARR: Either way, they are reclusive creatures! I may have run into some a couple times over the centuries... they all wanted me dead, of course. EINARR: Vampires and werewolves really don't mix at all.

MORTEN: What are they like in real life, anyway? Do you remember enough? MORTEN: Are they like, these horrifying bloodthirsty manwolves, or... are they more like furries. EINARR: Who's Furries? MORTEN: ...

EINARR: It's a strange name, but I know better than to question the validity of it. What context am I missing here?

MORTEN: ...

EINARR: Well? Don't leave me hanging like that. EINARR: Did this Furries person do something egregious? MORTEN: Um. Well, it's not a person. MORTEN: Let's just say they're cute animal characters some people like to draw. They got human features like the ability to talk and maybe walk on two legs, that sort of stuff. MORTEN: And I guess in this context I mostly referred to them as like, the opposite of bloodthirsty powerhungry evil manwolves who rip people apart. Sorry. EINARR: I see...

MORTEN: So! Which one is a real werewolf the most like? EINARR: ... EINARR: I'd say both, actually. MORTEN: Oh?? So you mean like- EINARR: Wait. The movie...

EINARR: That does not look like a wolf at all. MORTEN: Oh right, we were supposed to be watching this slop...

MORTEN: .... MORTEN: Is that murderer guy seriously just a man in a cheap bunny costume? EINARR: Looks like it. MORTEN: Aaaaand all the characters are already dead. EINARR: Yes. That didn't take very long, did it?

MORTEN: And here I was actually almost looking forwards to seeing that werewolf they were going on about!! Bruh. EINARR: Budget cuts, probably. MORTEN: Sure, or it's just the film-makers' poor idea of a cool plot twist. Like wow, look! It wasn't a werewolf after all! It's just another budget scoobydoo villain, here to kill everyone... EINARR: Scooby doo was that cartoon about those kids and that talking dog, right? MORTEN: Yeah. EINARR: ... EINARR: Does... Scooby doo qualify as a "furry"?

MORTEN: That sure is a question.

-------

MORTEN: Welp, movie's over! And I just remembered that our human guests will probably want food. EINARR: Oh! True, I almost forgot about that. MORTEN: Party starts in maybe three hours. Go do your stuff while I bake Rune a cake. EINARR: Alright! Just remember, do not put on the candles. Those seem to have mysterious magical properties when placed on a cake... even a vampire can grow older from blowing those out. I've seen it happen. MORTEN: Wait, who? Vlad Straud? EINARR: Well, why do you think he looks so grey already? Vladislaus blew out those candles and now he looks like an old man. And that was the last birthday he ever celebrated. MORTEN: Alright, good to know. I do think our human guests will want cake either way! EINARR: They'll love it.

It was at this point Mort decided they actually really enjoy baking.

Meanwhile...

EINARR: BAT... How many times-

EINARR: The laundry basket is RIGHT THERE.

EINARR: It's no use. I cannot wake him until the sun is down anyway, he'll just get extremely pissy about it.

EINARR: What ever. Every day is laugardagr with these kids in the house. EINARR: It's fine. I chose to live with them.

And the cake is done. No candles, as ordered!

CONTINUE ->

[knowyourbmovieactors]

OCTOBER HORROR MOVIES (DVD EDITION) #1: DEAD SEASON

OCTOBER HORROR MOVIES (DVD EDITION) #1

DEAD SEASON

Let's get this party started with the most wildly oversaturated genre of horror in the modern era. Yes, it's a zombie film (and, I believe, one of the few that wormed its way into my pile of DVDs this year). "Dead Season" is a cheap production that was quickly cranked out in 2012 for SyFy (I still get a little vomit in the back of my throat whenever I'm reminded of how the SciFi channel rebranded itself into stupidity), probably to cash in on the huge popularity of this then relatively new show called "The Walking Dead." The plot feels like a pitch for a "Walking Dead" spin-off that was never greenlit. Not only do characters in the movie refer to the zombies as "walkers", but it apparently streamed on Amazon for a hot second under the title "The Running Dead."

A year after the zombie apocalypse, two survivors make a plan to escape the mainland for a tropical island that they blindly assume the zombies can't get to. Once on the island, they find it is already occupied by a sort-of paramilitary group headed by the grizzled veteran of some unspecified branch of the military by the name of "Kurt Conrad". If you thought to yourself, "The screenwriter is obviously trying to make a reference to the character Kurtz from the novel 'Heart of Darkness' by Joseph Conrad," then, congratulations, your English Lit degree has finally come in handy. This movie makes a couple other attempts at referencing much better pieces of media that came before it (Our main male character starts off in Pennsylvania; you know, where "Night of the Living Dead" was filmed. There's a guy sitting around reading Max Brooks' "Zombie Survival Guide" and chuckling. The main female character seems to be costumed as if she were cosplaying as Tifa from Final Fantasy VII, because, I guess she's good at fighting.), but there's just nothing original, interesting, or even fun here. It's not even "so bad that it's good."

There are fleeting moments of the possibility of a better film here. Every once in a while, there is a genuinely good shot with some nice framing. There are a couple of silent montages of our main characters moving through this now dead world that speak volumes more than any of the dialogue. But, then there's the rest of the movie, shot on a shaky handheld Canon DSLR camera instead of a camera actually intended for making movies, weirdly color corrected, with a couple of glaring continuity errors, and so haphazardly edited that Amber declared, "I have no idea where anyone is in relation to anything else," and all I could say was, "Well, they're on a boat, and there's that guy over there, and, oh, that guy, too, I forgot about him, and, um, yeah, there's a bunch of zombies."

Director and co-writer Adam Deyoe has made several cheap zombie films (or "cult" films, as his biography grandly states) in between his main gig of doing production work for a couple of animated TV series. Every once in while, he goes off to a beautiful tropical location and makes a zombie movie (kind of like how Adam Sandler had that run of forgettable films that were obviously made so he and his buddies could take a paid vacation). I guess that's a pretty good con. No matter where you go in the world, if you put up a Craigslist ad looking for unpaid extras for a zombie film, a disturbing number of people will show up, many of them already in their own makeup. "Dead Season" was filmed in Puerto Rico. Deyoe's latest movie, "Decade of the Dead", was filmed in Hawaii. It follows a small group of survivors of the zombie apocalypse who make a plan to escape the mainland for a tropical island that they blindly assume the zombies can't get to... wait, did he just make the same film again?! Damn, dude, your movie was terrible, but your ability to con producers into funding your vacations is impressive!

THINGS I LEARNED FROM THE DVD EXTRAS

-It rains a lot in Puerto Rico, and this production was in no way prepared for that fact.

-Several members of the crew are also actors in the film, which is cute when you're making a student film, but a bad harbinger of things to come on a "professional" shoot.

-In the "making of" featurette, lead actor Marissa Merrill (who also got the job after answering a Craigslist ad) constantly has a look on her face that screams, "How the fuck did I end up here?!"