#but this is just not what “agab” means and how it works

[sillysapphillean]

No way there r perisex people on here making up "neo agab"s y'all love taking intersex terms and just doing whatever with them 😭 no one is getting assigned plant at birth

Agab terms don't describe gender identity, they describe what sex label you've been assigned at birth & what gender cissexist and intersexist society expects you to perform based on that.

Stop trying to turn them into gender identity terms. Stop misusing agab language

[starryreading]

So they don’t remember that but at some point my best friend (who is queer themselves) and I were on a walk and they proposed to me the idea that I might be aroace and I literally just brushed it off with “but I like reading romance novels” and then never talked about that or thought about it again for a very long time. I suppose that I didn’t know what the labels meant at that time but now that I actually identify as aroace this is kinda ironic.

[official-megumin]

I'm both trans and intersex. Not just intersex by technicality either.

I was born with both male and female primary sexual characteristics, it affects me every day. Chronic pain, discrimination from doctors, you name it. My life is a constant attempt at convincing the world that my body genuinely does not fit the binary of male and female.

I was still assigned male despite this, so most of my life has been shaped by that, most of my trauma around my gender comes from being trans. But still despite that, I identify closer with my intersex identity.

I do that because even within the trans community there is little understanding or respect for intersex people, we're often made to fit a perisex trans understanding of sex and gender, and that's frustrating.

This means that I primarily fight for intersex rights, even more so with how most of the world refuses to acknowledge our existence even in this age of better understanding of trans people.

I simply have to with how the world works.

But...

The fight for intersex rights and the fight for trans rights is essentially the same. It's a fight to not be limited by the majority, a fight not to be forced to conform to the status quo rejecting out nature.

It's as unnatural to force a trans person to comform to their AGAB as it is to force an intersex person to undergo surgery or forced HRT.

Both are violations of our individuality and our bodily autonomy, both are entirely fueled by a refusal to understand or adapt to reality.

The reality is that trans people are the gender they claim to be, and that intersex people don't have to be clearly male or female to be complete people.

This is why transphobes will ALWAYS be at odds with intersex people

To any terf or otherwise transphobe out there:

You're not our friend, you're not on our side. And you'll never be speaking for us when you try to put down trans people.

You'll always be our enemy, you'll always be our oppressor, and ultimately, you'll be left in the dust. Being nothing nothing but a villain in the grand scheme of human history, just like all other bigots before you. You can claim to be right all you want, but in the end. Life proves you wrong. You can't fight that forever.

Edit: When I say intersex by technicality I don't mean to exclude anyone, no matter how minor your intersex condition may seem, no matter if it's visible or not to those around you. You're still intersex, and your experience matters.

I was just trying to shut up bad faith actors who've tried to attack me by implying I wasn't truly intersex in the past. Which ironically is what I have done here.

For that I am sorry

[trans-androgyne]

Radical feminism cannot ever be trans-inclusive.

Why do I keep saying this? Because I have increasingly been seeing transmasc and transfem folks weaponize radical feminist ideas against each other and I am tired of it.

(TL;DR at the end, I know this is lengthy.)

So, what is radical feminism and how does it differ from other kinds of feminism? It’s the idea that patriarchy is the primary root oppression from which all other oppression spawns. It holds that the two primary classes are men/males and women/females, and that men are responsible for creating and maintaining all oppression, with women playing a more passive, secondary role. We're off to a bad start already; this is an inherently racist framework that absolves privileged women of their role in creating and upholding oppression, as the idea is that if women ran the world oppression would not exist. Intersectional feminism, on the other hand, understands the way many forms of oppression are rooted in racism, and that all systems of oppression are interconnected without having one singular root.

The way it functions and its prescribed remedies rely on the idea of a sisterhood--all women/females are connected with each other against men/males. The common belief is that males as the more powerful* class will always try to oppress women unless women band together against them and intervene. Men are framed as the enemy to be fought, not potential allies to be recruited into feminism.

Many of us have an idea of traditional cis radical feminism and how that leads to TERFism. But how does it function in the trans community? For radical feminism to work, a "sister" class oppressed by misogyny and an enemy class causing it must be identified. Radfem trans women will say that their identity as women means they experience the worst misogyny--trans men and mascs just get the weaker "misdirected" version, and in fact have a motive to uphold misogyny due to their identification with manhood*. Trans men are the enemy class that oppresses trans women. Radfem trans men will say that people afab are the real class that experiences the worst misogyny due to their ability to give birth*--while trans women and fems as people amab* are more aligned with cis men due to having received male privilege and been "socialized male" in addition to not having the same reproductive capabilities*. Trans women are the enemy class that oppresses trans men.

Both of these notions rely on painting groups of trans people as having access to patriarchal power they do not. They downplay the way misogyny functions in the lives of the perceived patriarchal class of trans people. It inherently ignores the real experiences of trans people and paints some of them as an enemy class; it cannot ever be truly inclusive of all trans people. Intersectional transfeminism would take into account the way misogyny functions in the oppression of all trans people, and analyze the material conditions of trans folks to reveal that no group of them is granted access to patriarchal power and cis male privilege. It means banding together as a unified trans community and understanding where our experiences are shared, as well as accounting for the way other systems of oppression critically shape the lives of trans people of color, disabled trans people, intersex trans people, and other groups.

*There are a lot of assumptions present in this analysis like the assumed agabs and reproductive abilities of trans men and women; these are not my beliefs but the oversimplifications espoused by the radfems I'm describing.

TL;DR: Radical feminism requires identifying one class as the patriarchal oppressors and the other as the oppressed victims. In the "trans-inclusive" version, this means downplaying the experiences with misogyny of either trans men and mascs or trans women and fems. It identifies either transmisogyny or "afabmisogyny" as the real root of all oppression, ignoring the voices and experiences of the most marginalized trans people. Truly inclusive transfeminism would unite all trans people against the patriarchy instead of falsely implicating us in it.

[locketsvault]

「 CUDDLING WITH BSD MEN PT 2/4 」

pairings: chuuya x reader ፥ akutagawa x reader ፥ oda x reader

tags: gender neutral reader, no agab mentioned, first person, fluff, cuddling/phyiscal affection

warnings: talks of canon illness in akutagawa, not proof read

other parts: ada ᨒ port mafia ᨒ doa + the guild ᨒ the hunting dogs

a/n: fyi for chuuya I have not read stormbringer so forgive me. oda is also short because I didn’t really know what to say for him. no gender or sex mentioned, no pronouns either!

// chuuya nakahara ⌇˚.༄

⮑ Is there such thing as classy cuddles? Because he gives classy cuddles.

⮑ The word I’d use for him in a relationship is classy, I can’t help it. But I do mean classy in a good way. Physical affection with him started off small, and he allowed you to pace when you were ready for more. I also see him as someone who always has an arm around you, either over your shoulders or on your waist.

⮑ He keeps pda to a minimum, he won’t cuddle you in public, especially in front his co workers. He’s an executive and he takes it serious. I also don’t think he’d want to show you as his weakness, he wouldn’t want you to get hurt.

⮑ Cuddling with Chuuya is oddly nice. Oddly because he seems rough on the outside. He is very rarely little spoon during cuddle sessions, he feels insecure. But he makes up for it, he’s a great big spoon. He’s a warm, very very warm. I can actually picture you in between his legs cuddling him while he has a wine glass in his hand. Now a many things could happen, one of you is talking, or you’re watching something. Either way, it works well with him.

⮑ The downside is he isn’t home much for cuddles. He’s either away for jobs or at work. So unless you’re willing to sit in his lap while he does paperwork, you don’t get your cuddles.

⮑ 7/10, very good cuddles …when you get them.

// ryunosuke akutagawa ⌇˚.༄

⮑ I just want to know how you managed to touch him in the first place.

⮑ Everyone always says he is touch adverse, which I completely agree, but then people usually say that when it comes down to it he hates it and stuff like that. I have to disagree. I think he’s terrified of it yes, he grew up without any form of physical love, but I do think deep down he yearns for it. He craves it and, when he finally gives in, his entire meticulously built wall completely shatters. Which is how I wonder, how’d you manage it?

⮑ I won’t lie, I believe behind closed doors once he’s comfortable with cuddling or touch and he’s quite clingy. You just feel so warm and well— safe. I can promise you though, it will only be behind closed doors. Do not try to be physically affectionate in public, especially in front of his coworkers. At least not for a very long time.

⮑ I like to imagine that after a time, with lots of reassurance about his ability, he will pull you into cuddles with rashomon. Which, I feel like he’d be bad about verbally asking for affection so he’d do that instead. It’s easier on his illness to use his ability.

⮑ Speaking of his illness sadly, it can make cuddling tough. One moment you could be resting in his arms and the next he’s having a nasty coughing fit. There’s been times when he’s be insecure about his illness and not want to be touched anymore.

⮑ 4/10, I love my baby but his illness + his traumas it’s hard for him to be physically affectionate.

// oda sakunosuke ⌇˚.༄

⮑ He takes care of orphans therefore I am a firm believer he knows how to cuddle.

⮑ I mean it too, he takes care of kids physically and emotionally, he’s got dad hugs. If anyone is gonna hold you and it make you feel safe and taken care of, it’s him. And he knows it too. And he has a six sense for when you need cuddling. And sometimes you end up in a cuddle pile with the kids. I don’t make the rules.

⮑ Oda is 50/50 with pda, he doesn’t mind it, especially if it’s something you love. But it does worry him, like Chuuya, he’s afraid of showing you as a weakness and you getting hurt or killed. But if it’s safe, he usually sticks to holding your hand or holding your waist. I can see him holding you close with your heads rested in each others shoulders while at a public theater.

⮑ Private cuddles are common and comfortable. Oh and he’s always the big spoon. He’s always holding you, I don’t really see him as the type to be held.

⮑ 9/10 you can feel all the care in his arms.

main hub ✦ masterlist ✦ to do list

[transmascpetewentz]

One thing that doesn't get brought up enough in discussions of how the man-hating variety of radical feminism is based in homophobia. Like does no one remember when lesbian separatist radfems tried to claim that all gay men are predators? I think that a lot of people on tumblr who haven't really unlearned that rhetoric spread it unknowingly and will say shit like "well I'm not like those other misandrists, I don't hate gay men because they're gay I hate them because they're men!"

Ok but the effect is the same. Patriarchal structures of manhood and masculinity oppress queer men and men of color with their manhood/masculinity as a modifier. I do not like the word misandry for many reasons but the patriarchal role of a man is more than just the absence of womanhood or the position of power over others.

Butches, trans men, and some nonbinary people are all groups that do not generally have access to male privilege, but we still have the modifier of "male" factor into our oppression. All marginalized men have this modifier to an extent. Gay men are not simply oppressed for being gay, they are oppressed for being gay men specifically and occupying that position in society. While most cis gay men have access to cis and male privilege, they are still oppressed for how their gender and agab intersects with their gay identity.

What I mean when I talk about marginalized manhood is the common threads between different oppressions of minority male identities. It doesn't imply that misandry is real or that misogyny isn't. I don't know if there's a particular name for this type of theory/thought, but it perfectly explains how trans men are oppressed as a type of marginalized man while still experiencing misogyny.

Binary, radfem thinking makes people believe that marginalized manhood is characterized by the absence of misogyny when this could not be further from the truth. Woman—man is not only a bad way of looking at gender identity, but is also not how social positionality works. There are ways to explain how trans and intersex men are able to experience misogyny and marginalized manhood at the same time, but that requires us to quit thinking that the two social positional genders are "male" and "non-man".

[kaeyx]

how do you think bsd men would react if they praised reader in bed but they started sobbing bc of daddy issues

Characters: Dazai, Chuuya, Fyodor, Nikolai

Warnings: smut, gn reader (no agab mentioned), dacryphilia

Notes: I'm actually not sure why daddy issues would trigger in this instance unless you're fucking Fukuzawa bc none of the bsd men have dad energy, so I'll assume it's like you get overwhelmed with the way they treat you? Getting praised and you're not used to it so you cry? Do elaborate if I fucked up.

It goes without saying that Dazai likes it when you cry. You look so pretty and vulnerable, eyes glittering and chest heaving as he folds you in two, cock nestled nice and deep. If he's not actively trying to make you cry though he'll pause and ask what's wrong, brushing your tears away. Once he's made sure that he's not doing anything wrong though? Business as usual. He'll keep praising you if that's what you want and you can cry your little heart out.

Chuuya is another one that stops immediately. But with him it's more likely that you'd be crying even before your clothes came off, because he's just so sweet and thorough with foreplay. Bringing you into his lap, cupping your face while he kisses you, needy and messy but not rushing it. He'll have his fill of your mouth before moving on to the rest of you, calling you gorgeous, tracing your body over your clothes and telling you how he needs you so much, how he loves you. No wonder you'd start crying a little. He'd freeze, shushing you, telling you he'll stop if you like, apologizing for being too intense or going too fast, reassuring you that you can back out whenever you like. When you explain it's good tears he'd be so relieved. From then on it's his goal to make you feel so good you cry, every single time.

Straight up, you're not going to cry because he's praising you. Any approval you get from him is condescending, always accompanied by some degrading pet name like "thing", "puppet", "pet", "animal", maybe "whore". There's no doubt in your mind that you're a toy to him, something to abuse out of idle curiosity. He wants to know just how far he can push you before you break. If you cry? Well, that just means it's working. Maybe it'll earn you a slap if your sobbing distracts him, or he'll just laugh and mock you. What, can't even take this? Crying already? Poor, sweet little mouse. You're lucky you're so pretty when you cry.

Nikolai is another one that likes tears (and no you cannot sense a theme with me) so if you're crying it's just going to be a compliment for him. Whenever he praises you he's not as eloquent as some of the others, but he means it. Calling you so fucking pretty, so warm and tight and good, taking him even when it hurts and letting him stuff you nice and full. He loves the blissed out look on your face when you cum, or when you stop struggling and relax and he can sink in deep. Tears just mean you're a little too full, and that's just how he likes you! If you explain why it is, he won't even mind. You like his voice? Like it when he calls you his? Good, he likes it too.

[nothorses]

this isn't @ anyone or any particular post, but. I do find myself questioning whether it's useful to distinguish "anti-masculism" from like... misogyny and patriarchy.

maybe it's just me, but narrowing the definition of "misogyny" to just describe contempt for women, specifically, has never felt super accurate to me; the overall system of oppression being described here isn't just about a dislike of women, it's a functioning system (patriarchy) relying on, and as a product of, systemitized misogyny. It's misogyny in a dominant role of power.

And that system (as it currently exists) also requires that gender roles are strictly followed and fulfilled, including by men. It requires no deviance; no queerness and no transness. It requires that women be babymakers and caretakers and sexual gratifiers, and it requires that men be protectors and dominant breadwinners, and seek out sex. (Among other things)

I think it's helpful to expand our understanding of misogyny to include the aspects of it that necessarily impact men; it's not just the toxic masculinity that hurts others, but the system that rewards and punishes conformity to misogynistic gender roles.

"Anti-masculism" feels like it's trying to describe an aspect of this; the way this system views masculinity as brutal and violent and monstrous, especially in relation to men of color, and as a corrupting force- particularly when in contact with (whoever patriarchy views as) women.

And these things exist, and happen, but (obv) so does a mirrored phenomena for femininity; are we calling that "misogyny", to the exclusion of attitudes toward masculinity? Because I don't think it's accurate- and tbh I think it's actively counterproductive- to define that by gendered expression rather than perceived gender.

I honestly think it does more to say that these are all a part of misogyny, and to identify contempt for certain expressions of masculinity as being inherently, necessarily intertwined with other parts of misogyny. Patriarchy relies on all of these things to function, and we need to get folks to understand that challenging these attitudes toward masculinity is, in fact, a crucial part of the fight against patriarchy.

I don't think it works to say "misogyny" is an umbrella term that enconpasses all of this, and that "anti-masculism" just falls under it, either; just practically speaking, I don't think it's helpful to differentiate this particular thing as separate from similar attitudes toward femininity. It's super easy to separate the word from that context (esp without a counterpart for femininity), and while I hate having to factor in optics, I do think there's a parallel here to "transmisandry" in the possible interpretation of the word to mean that men are oppressed/misogyny doesn't exist. Even if we know that's not the intent.

And I don't think it accounts for differences between how either of these manifest for cis vs. trans people, gender-conforming vs. GNC people, straight vs. queer people, white people vs. people of color, etc.; how and why it shows up is gonna be wildly different based on whether you're being presumed more masculine or feminine because of your race, size, or disability status, or whether you're being punished for not conforming to gender expectations one way or another- which will also look different for trans people who present more in line with what's expected of their AGAB vs. their actual gender.

Also- I'm saying this here because I'm open to discussion. I feel like I've read enough about it by this point to have an opinion, but I could absolutely be lacking some crucial info, insight, or perspective, and I want folks to engage with this as a mutual conversation.

[corviiids]

hi rook sorrgy I'm back but I've been thinking about your akeshu as girls genderfuckery tweet for 20 million years. idk if you can share anything in good faith here on the Tumblr corner of the internet (if not then by all means ignore this) but if you did I'd owe you perhaps my entire soul!! thank you very much either way :3

i would LOVE to talk about this thank you so much for asking

[under the cut in case anyone would not like to see genderfuckery stuff]

okay so first of all.

on the topic of boobs

this is important to lead with do you understand. most of the akeshu as girls stuff ive seen around has akc as flat-chested and ren as boobed. and that's valid i support that. but personally. personally to me. i think it's the opposite. tbe reason (well one reason) i think it's the opposite is because i think girlren is a little rat of a creature and akechi who is prim and feminine and perfect is so FUCKING angry about her crush on ren like she's barely surviving it and then this is the nail in the coffin. she's like why can't i stop thinking about that messy unassuming thing. she doesn't even have boobs

my other reasons for tihs are that i think joker is more androgynous charm while akechi is more feminine/masculine duality i think this makes sense to nobody else. i think ren regardless of agab is riding the rail of the gender spectrum 🛹 while akc is collecting extremes of gender presentation like they're pokemon do you understand. are we on the same page here. ren being into drag is important to me for this reason (again regardless of agab). meanwhile akechi having very clear feminine secondary sex characteristics but presenting gradually more and more masculine in terms of clothing/hair/personal style etc. is also extremely important to me. and that includes being biog of tity while her style veers more and more into masc as time goes on

ok

the detective prince

i think girl akechi (at 17-18) presents very femininely because it's what's effective for her. i would call her style................... kawaii corporate chic. does that make sense for everyone. it's like schoolgirl girlboss. she has a bow instead of a tie but it's a very classy one not a kitschy one. smart blazer, uniform pleated skirt, patent leather shoes, u know the drill BUT. people still call her the detective prince. this is VERY IMPORTANT to me. no detective princess. only detective prince. do you understand the importance of the genderfuckery of a super feminine girl being called by masculine terms. to me. we're continuing the legacy set by my hero naoto shirogane bigender queeng. bigender kin. bigender genderneutral non-monarchical ruler

i think by third sem girl akechi is starting to dress more androgynously/masculinely. more pants. i think her third sem outfit is unchanged from canon. just a smart coat, sweater, buttondown, slacks. postcanon she gets a haircut.

just trying to live an honest student life

ren is like so fundamentallyuncomfortable with the fact of his existence at the beginning of canon so to me girlren is like... she dresses like she's trying to hide in her clothes. messy hair. i have no strong feelings about whetehr her hair should be long or short, or whether it's loose or pulled into a tail, but i know it's messsy. untamed curls. and she uses it to hide her face. none of her clothes fit. she's in oversized everything. i have a very clear image in my head of a ren idle animation where she leans down to pull up her leggings because they keep falling down. she also has terrible posture. she's androgynous at this stage not on purpose but because she's too self conscious to like... exist... and present... in any notable way at all

i think as she gets more confident and as the year progresses she starts to dress more distinctively. i like the idea of her getting more comfortable prettying up. maybe working at crossroads helps her with this 🤔 i dont know how to explain this but i think she's still feminine in a gentlemanly chivalrous way rather than a girly cute way. girlren has that same steady calming vibe that guy ren does

joker & crow

crow has a magical girl skirt. i have a drawing of this but im too self conscious about my own lack of drawing skill to show it off so i cropped out the key part and put it into an ms paint void in the distance as my visual aid

there. i hope this is illustrative

i think given girl akechi's use of her feminine charms to gain popularity, her hero complex would be similarly gendered given we have confirmation that robin hood represents not (only) heroics for altruistic reasons but also the theatre of being seen doing good. there's a real drama element to the idea of a magical girl transformation that i honestly wish we got for male crow too. i always am depressed that we don't get to see much theatre for akechi's initial appearance as crow and summoning of robin hood, anyway, girlcrow has ribbons and a capelet that flap in non-existent wind.

black mask's outfit is unchanged from canon. i'd like it to look a little less stupid but that has nothing to do with gender i just want it to look a little less stupid.

joker's outfit is also unchanged from canon. listen. im back on my bullshit. in the metaverse her behaviour gets more feminine and more sly and confident than in reality. she's got that femme fatale shit going on. however, she is still a gentleman thief. she has the long coat. she has the poofy trousers. she has the waistcoat. she's still smirking and fixing her gloves and flipping her knife and doing that thing that canon ren does where he lifts his chin and does the little "come on" thing with her fingers. do you understand? do you understand me

[velvetvexations]

in my opinion, the problem with transmisogyny exempt (tme) / transmisogyny affected (tma) as terms is that, in practice, it works backwards. it Assumes that only amab people who are mtf or mtx are transmisogyny affected, rather than simply being a term for anyone who can or does experience transmisogyny.

which causes issues Both because it became a new way to ask nonbinary people what's in their pants (the Same issue with how agab language can be used against nonbinary people)

And because these aren't the only groups that can experience transmisogyny. they're the Main groups of course (the ones the term is named after), but they aren't the Only ones.

there are afab intersex people who overtly experience transmisogyny because of the way that they look, some who consider themselves cis women and some who don't. there are multi-gender and genderfluid and agender people who medically transition and present in ways that aren't cleanly binary. who mix masculine and feminine traits in ways that get them interpreted as all sorts of things. there are trans men and trans masc who are gnc, before during and after medically transitioning, who will share traits with trans women.

and the argument in response to that is Usually something along the lines of "sure these groups Can experience transmisogyny, but it's Misdirected. they're not the Main Groups who experience transmisogyny so the term shouldn't be for them."

and the thing about that is ! we already Have the terms "transmisogyny" and "trans woman" and "trans fem." we Have words to talk about the issues that these groups of people face. so it confuses me that we've created a term that Specifically means "everyone who is affected by transmisogyny," that apparently Doesn't include Everyone Who Is Affected By Transmisogyny.

I feel like the term tma could be Useful as an all-inclusive term. to talk about the affect transmisogyny has on All people, without specifying any specific kind of person. but as is the only point I see it used for is cutting people Out of conversations.

the problem with "tma" is that it comes packaged with "tme." gender and sex and presentation and identity are Messy, people who are very different on paper often share spaces and experiences with each other. and being squeamish about that fact, about having to Share with people who are different from you, is often directly what leads to exclusionism.

bigots don't care if you're Really a trans woman or not, they just see someone who's visibly Other in a way they don't like and treat you accordingly. so to decide that a whole group of people is Exempt from being interpreted as a trans woman by a bigot misses the point.

straight people can be Affected by homophobia, whether that straight person is cis and perisex and allo or trans and intersex and aro/ace. and it doesn't hurt anyone to acknowledge that the same is true for transphobia and transmisogyny (or transandrophobia or exorsexism)

This is all really, really well said and you put a lot of thought into dissecting this inside and out, it's a really good analysis of why and how it doesn't work. I think ultimately it comes down to the fact that this vocabulary does not actually exist to solve any problems in the first place.

[mutual-monsters]

implications

Pairing: Roommate!Joe x M!Reader (agab not specified)

TW: dubcon, dark-ish/yandere themes, stalking, possessiveness, mention of masturbation (m), p in ✨ambiguous genital✨, creampie, slight praise, Joe is a major creeper

MINORS DNI !!! 🔞

Word count: 777

A/N: A combination of two asks–

“Hi, happy Valentine’s Day! I hope you enjoy it.

If you’d like, I’d love some Joe Goldberg smut, but only if you’re comfortable with writing it, of course. Honestly any plot I’ll love, but here’s a prompt if you’d like:

M!Reader catches Joe in their house, and confronts him. Joe tries to play it off, but reader doesn’t buy it. Something along the lines of “if you want me just say it” happens and, well, one thing leads to another.”

and 

“I am dying for a smutty Joe Goldberg x reader fanfic, maybe where they've been friends for a long time and finally Joe gets what they both want? Thanks 🙂”

It was just supposed to be a quick trip– in and out and never seen, never heard. He just wanted to break in look around for a while and maybe take a few things make sure you were safe. It was so simplistic; be in, be around, and be out before you were back from work.

Only, he hadn’t factored in the possibility of you coming home early. 

He had already looked through the dresser and under the bed when your car pulled into the driveway, but was too preoccupied with your laundry bin to hear the faint but audible click as the deadbolt unlocked. And, consequently, he was too busy shoving a pair of underwear into his bag to hear the sound of your feet padding gently down the carpeted hall, into your room and–

“Joe?” You ask, staring in amazement at your roommate as he rifles through your things, “What the fuck are you doing in my room?”

He stops, questioning if this is real, and then briefly berating himself before turning to you with a, “It’s not what it looks like.”

“Oh, no? Then, what is it? Because it looks like you’re stealing my boxers.”

This wasn’t the first time you had caught him in here, just the first time you’d confronted him about it. You had known he had been breaking into your room, and you had definitely noticed the missing underwear, but never did you actually think you’d see him in action.

“No, no, no, no! I swear, I just– I lost a pair in the wash and I came in here to see if maybe one of mine got mixed in with yours…” He trails off.

“Joe,” You start, closing the gap between your bodies as you speak, “It’s not that I don’t understand why you would do all of this, but if you honestly wanted me, you could’ve just said something.”

He doesn’t know how to respond, still in a state of fight or flight. A long pause. You speak up again.

“These walls aren’t as thick as you think, Joe.  I know you think of me when you fuck yourself.” A beat. “And I know you do it every night.”

His face, flushed red now, burns under the scrutiny of your words. Your eyes crawl over him, waiting for him to respond.

“I know you moan to my name to yourself when you think you’re being quiet.”

“I have not by any means meant to–”

“Do you have the blue ones? With the ducks? They went missing about two weeks ago and I’d really love to have them ba–”

His lips crash into yours, too preoccupied with the concept of finally touching, holding, possessing to care about formalities. 

His hands move to fumble with your jeans, pulling them off, pushing you toward the bed. His pants, too, now, drop to the floor as you pull off your shirt, him following suit. He looks you over, fully acquainting himself with your naked form, gathering the words to say, before finally, “You are everything.”

A slight chuckle from your lips, “Maybe to you.”

“Are you sure you want this?” Parts of him still don’t believe that this could possibly be real.

“Of course.”

He pushes himself inside you, basking in the feeling, the texture of your skin, your smell. He waits a moment, lost in the feeling, before bringing himself back, compelled by your request for him to move.

He’s slow at first, acclimating to feeling. His eyes search for yours, with pupils blown out and full of adoration. He is in more than love, more than obsession, morethananywordintheEnglishlanguage and he needs you to know.

As he picks up the pace, his lips rush to your neck, desperate to mark you, to make you his, and then to your ear whispering, begging for you. 

“Tell me you love me.”

You can barely get a word in before he speaks again.

“You don’t have to mean it, just– please.”

You don’t think, you just say it. 

“I love you, Joe.”

This sets him ablaze, igniting a feral side of him.

“Again.” He demands.

And you do. “I love you”.

It’s enough for him to come undone, coating the inside of you with himself, claiming you, he tells himself. He stays in the moment, bringing you to your own edge, and then absorbing the feeling entirely. 

He thinks, to himself, while still inside you, of what he’s just done, of what you’ve just done, 

of the implications. 

He looks down at you, again into your eyes, infatuated, and says, holding back a smartass grin– “I suppose I could give you those boxers back.”

[voredere]

you guys are so fucking ignorant about intersex people that it's insane. you have this view of intersex women fitting neatly into some stereotype of "regular afab with pcos" and you clearly have no fucking clue how AGAB is determined. i do understand the frustration with terms being misappropriated, this happens all the time for mixed poc as well, but when you turn the whole thing into a witch hunt based entirely off of deeply intersexist assumptions on how being intersex can work, you show that you're just as disgusted with us as cis perisex people are. we are nothing but a gotcha to you.

anyway when i defend "afab tma" and "afab transfems" im defending intersex women who had their sex reassigned at birth against their will and still materially live as trans women, i'm defending intersex women whose circumstances you do not understand that materially live as trans women, and im defending intersex women who do not have an assigned sex at birth and chose one based on factors you don't know or understand that materially live as trans women, and i'm defending intersex women who have self identified as "afab" based on their personal perceptions of their body rather than their legally assigned sex that still materially live as trans women.

"if your experience can be neatly described as cafab--" is just so revealing as to how little any of you know about how AGAB is actually assigned for intersex infants. there is no one standard. it comes down to the whims of your parents or doctor and no two people have the exact same experience. there are thousands of ways to be intersex.

you need to stop making assumptions about someone else's body and history and lived experiences based on what YOU imagine "cafab" is supposed to mean, or what it meant for the token intersex person in your friend group. it's not about "oooh we get mistaken for trannies sometimes" it's about materially living the same fucking experiences and circumstances as a trans women, being denied the option of being cis, being materially treated as trans without exception for our entire lives, and pointing out that women with this experience exist. to claim otherwise is as simple as saying you believe intersex women are inherently liars.

[redtail-lol]

Theyfab Flag!

Image ID: A 7 striped flag. Colors, in descending order, are: pink; salmon; light gold; white; light purple; violet; pink. End ID.

Theyfab is a slur/insult thrown at AFAB nonbinary people, especially feminine-presenting AFAB people. I am reclaiming it. This flag is for other people who reclaim it. The reclaimed theyfab stands for celebrating femininity when freed from girlhood, being connected to your AGAB, body, femininity, and/or she/her pronouns without that invalidating your identity, separating gender from presentation, transmasculinity and transneutrality, detaching oneself from girlhood, and acknowledging the transmisandry and the misogyny that AFAB trans people face. Not all theyfabs will relate to all of these, they're just possible experiences that might effect why someone would identify with theyfab as a term. It stands against reducing trans people to their AGABs, destroying the norms that trans people must be traditionally masculine, feminine, or androgynous to be valid, supports pronoun nonconformity and gender nonconformity especially when done by trans people.

Anyone who is AFAB and nonbinary and/or transmasc and/or uses they/them pronouns and/or neos can reclaim this term. Additionally, anyone who's been derogatorily called "theyfab" can use it, regardless of actual AGAB, identity, or pronouns. It's my belief that slurs can be reclaimed by the people they hurt and the people like the ones they hurt.

If you cannot reclaim theyfab, but you support what this reclamation stands for, support people who reclaim it, and wholeheartedly support transmascs, transneutrals, and AFAB trans people, you can use this tf ally flag!

Image ID: A diluted version of the theyfab flag with an ally symbol in the colors of the theyfab flag, not diluted

Why I reclaim theyfab:

I have not personally been called a theyfab, but I feel I am the person they'd want to mock the most. Of course, I hit the basics:

• AFAB

• Nonbinary

• They/them

But also, I am:

• Bigender, with my primary gender being hypergirl

• Feminine presenting

• Cisgender, fully identifying as cisgender, and sometimes cistrans but usually just cisgender

• Don't want to transition

• She/her

If I wasn't above working for transphobes I could have been their theyfab mascot. I want to reclaim theyfab because despite being feminine presenting, despite still using she/her pronouns and still describing myself as cisgender, and despite being a girl, I am aporagender. I am nonbinary. I am all of these things and me being a girl, a girly girl, doesn't invalidate my gender and just because I prefer she/her pronouns doesn't mean I don't wanna be called they/them quite a bit. I am not any less valid for how I present or for the rest of my identity than any other nonbinary people, even those who fully medically transition.

[start-where-i-end]

I blocked @/euniexenoblade but I need to put in my two cents, so here it is:

Trans men only "benefit" from the patriarchy for as long as nobody is aware that we're trans. The second anyone finds out about our AGAB, all that privilege is gone. So, for trans men who don't pass flawlessly 100% of the time, there is zero male privilege happening because society does not view us as men. Society might see us as poor misguided girls and women or as disgusting circus freaks or something, but we're generally not seen as real men and thus do not gain any of the privilege that cis men get.

I myself am a trans man with very wide hips and DD cup breasts. Binding doesn't do anything worth a damn for me, and even if it did, there's very little I can do about my figure. I do not pass, I am seen as a woman 99% of the time, and I therefore do not receive any male privilege. I also can't afford HRT or top surgery, so if your (general you) response to that is "just pass better, idiot," congrats on the internalized transphobia and classism and medicalism.

Additionally, even trans men who do pass extremely well are going to suffer under the patriarchy in the same way that cis men do. Better not have long hair, or enjoy wearing dresses and skirts, or paint your nails, or order a girly drink at the bar, or whatever other trivial bullshit is deemed too feminine for "real men." The patriarchy's main target is women, yes, but it does collateral damage to all genders - including both cis and trans men.

I still have to contend with the same things women contend with. Walking home alone, creepy DMs from entitled creeps, people assuming that my AGAB means I'm less capable - these are all still things I deal with on the daily as a trans man. They don't go away just because I'm wearing a pin with my pronouns on them. If I say to a sexist person, "Actually, I'm a trans man, not a woman," do you really think they're gonna be like "Oh I'm so sorry sir, I had no idea, I retract everything I just said/did"?

No, it doesn't work that way. I didn't magically get any male privilege when I realized I was a man. A cis man will likely still get paid more than me, will likely still get hired or promoted before me, and will likely be taken more seriously than me.

Trans men do not inherently have male privilege.

I feel like some of these people are more interested in talking about how things "should be" according to their extremely specific vision, rather than how things are in reality.

What if a trans man perfectly passes? What if the patriarchy validates gender identities? What if this, what if that? And none of what they're talking about is applicable to reality in 99% cases.

As far as I am concerned, experiencing any non normative gender can only move you down in the social hierarchy, and not up. This is true for all trans people, regardless of their assigned gender and their eventual gender identity.

[kalethemonster]

trans men, all nonbinary people, AND all intersex people ARE affected by transmisogyny. all trans people are. transphobes dont care what your AGAB is, they are going to be transphobic because you are trans. if they read you as transfem they are GOING to call you a man. if they read you as transmasc they are GOING to you a woman. fetishizing cis men who try and SA you dont care how you identify. doctors who deny your care dont care what you want. being trans no matter if you're trans masc or trans fem means that alot of transphobes will use your proximity to feminimity against you! if you're transfem they'll say you're not woman enough. if your transmasc they'll say you're too woman. enbies and GNC trans people sadly have either assigned to them at random no matter what their AGAB was. it doent matter to them. 'transmisandry'... its literally just misogyny. misogyny is ment to suppress any and all femininity. which is a thing many cis men can and do possess. transmisogyny is SURPRISE litterally just the way misogyny affects transpeople! as i said in the post no matter your AGAB transphobes and terfs will use transmisogyny against you because they only care that you are a trans person! they dont care about anything else about you. they simply want you to not exist or exist as a corpse. transmisandry does not exist, you are talking about trans misogyny. i say this as nonbinary trans man. TME and TMA are reductive and inaccurate terms, as all trans and intersex people are affected by trans misogyny now can we work together to get back our rights please?? the former us president wants us all dead and if he is voted in (which is sooo scarily likely, even for an austalian, because of all the left leaning people saying they wont vote for biden... he is the lesser of two evils, trump has stated his plans to basically outlaw trans people within the hour he is indicted.) it WILL happen. and the current now former UK PM is was campaigning on removing trans rights, and the terf queen herself is backing him up monetarily. while austalia is safe currently, the coalition (liberal&national parties) has never been great(COOUGH COUGH SCOMO COUGH COUGH LITTLEPROUDSHIT). transmisogyny applies to all non cis and/or non perisex people. because transphobes dont care what 'kind' of trans person you are. they only see you as someone who is trans, and they either want you to not exist or to be dead. in fact all this infighting is what they WANT, because after we have almost completely destroyed ourselves, they can come in and easily hit the killing blow without any effort. us working together to fight for our rights makes it infinitely harder for them to strike us down. find your local trans and intersex people, group up, have real conversations, form a community. talk about who you plan to vote for in local, state, federal, and national elections. forming a real community with real life people you can see face to face makes it easier to stop fighting our own trans siblings and start fighting the people who want us dead. start punching up instead of punching the people in the same boat. start asking who put us in this tiny cramped ass boat and said we couldnt have yachts

[kittensyoonie]

TXT X Male Reader

After noticing his makeup artist was dealing with a bad depressive episode, Taehyun decides to step in. He didn’t mean to accidentally confess in the process, but he wasn’t complaining.

Kang Taehyun X Male Reader (no agab mentioned)

Requested: no

Warnings: I’m still learning the members individual personality so if I messed him up I’m sorry—, depressive episode, reader is just going through life, confessing, getting together

Y/n wasn’t usually a very outgoing bubbly person. Taehyun wouldn’t describe him as a ball of sunshine. But he had a warm comforting smile, kind tone, and always seemed happy. Especially when at work. He’d always talk to someone. Whether it was other staff or the boys themselves. And his laugh.

Taehyun didn’t fully realize how precious that laugh was until a few months prior y/n came in, not laughing or really talking to anyone. That’s when he overheard one of the other staff members, one of y/ns friends, talking about the fact he has depression, and was having a nasty episode that day.

After that he subconsciously paid more attention to y/n, to that laugh and smile. He’d encourage him to interact with his band mates just to see him brighten, and even make jokes.

He was aware he was falling for the boy day by day, but he also knew there was nothing he could do about it. And as hard as the situation was, being an idol, being gay, he couldn’t complain. Y/n was perfect to him.

So when y/n came in, eyes in a different dark world, lips turned downwards, looking like he had to force himself out of his bed, of course he was worried. And his concern grew more and more when he barely reacted to the boys playing around, and barely talked to anyone.

So during a break for filming, he pulled y/n aside when he had to fix up his makeup. Y/n thought nothing of it, figuring Taehyun just wanted to be alone while his makeup was being fixed.

“Do you need to talk about it?” Taehyun asked, automatically gaining y/ns attention. “I know you aren’t okay today.”

Y/n gave him a sad smile, fixing up his lips. “There’s nothing particular going on. I just— I don’t know, I woke up this morning and felt like the moon as placed on my chest. Everything hurts more than usual and I feel like I can’t do it. I know I can, but god… it feels like at any moment I’ll collapse.”

Taehyun looked him in the eyes the entire time, listening intently. His heart ached hearing his words, he just wanted to protect him. “How long does stuff like this last?”

“A day or so if I get control over it. Sometimes it can last a week though. For this, I really hope it’s just today.” Y/n responded, putting his brush away. “Thank you for listening…”

“I’m always here to listen,” taehyun quickly jumped in, gently grabbing y/ns wrist. “You won’t ever have to be alone here, especially with me.”

Y/ns eyebrows furrowed as he looked over to the idol, his heart pounding. The tip of his ears turning red too from the physical contact.

“And why is that?” He asked slightly breathlessly. He couldn’t fathom why Taehyun would go out of his way for him.

“Because, you’re important to me y/n.” Taehyun responded, stepping closer. “And I want you to be okay.”

Y/n stammered, looking at him with slightly wide eyes. Just as he was about to say something, the director called Taehyun back over. He felt the idols hand slip down to his, giving it a squeeze before walking off.

For the rest of the shoot, Taehyun noticed y/n smiling a bit more, his featured softened. He couldn’t help his own mood from cheering up as well. As long as y/n was okay.

He decided to stay behind to help the staff pack up along with Soobin. The other boys had decided to go home, getting their very much needed rest. Taehyun of course gravitated to y/n and his work station. Everyone in the room was gone by the time he actually helped y/n, Soobin helping them load things in the car. They were in a safe location away from fans, so there was no concern letting him help.

“What did you mean, especially for me?” Y/n asked when they were pretty much done, not looking at Taehyun. “And that I’m important to you.”

“It’s exactly as it sounds y/n. You’re important to me, so you’re especially safe with me. And you’re important to me because I like you.” Taehyun admitted, stopping what he was doing. “I’m not afraid to say it. You make me very happy y/n, I want to make sure you’re happy too.”

Y/ns head perked up and looked at Taehyun with wide eyes. “Y- you-“ y/n knew his own sexuality wasn’t a secret, but he forbade himself for even guessing if the boys could be the same. He pushed away his own developing feelings out of fear it would never go anywhere, or worse, get him fired. “You actually like me? Romantically?”

Taehyun smiled to himself and nodded, moving closer to y/n. “I overheard your friends talking about your depression, and after that I made it my mission to make sure you’d be okay. I didn’t want work to make it harder on you, I already liked you and no one deserves that. But by putting extra attention into you, I found myself falling for you.”

Y/ns cheeks turned more and more red with every sentence. He couldn’t believe it. It took him all his courage to look at Taehyun and not melt away. He placed his hand on Taehyuns chest, looking away from his gaze.

Taehyun smiled, placing one hand over y/ns as the other cupped his cheek. When he didn’t pull away, he leaned in, kissing his forehead. When he felt y/n lean into the kiss, he kissed down to his nose, before placing a soft yet passionate kiss to his lips.

Y/n returned the kiss before pulling away, his cheeks a deep red. “N- no more kisses until you take me on a proper date Kang Taehyun.”

Taehyun chuckled, squeezing his hand. “See you tomorrow after work then.”