starryreading

[starryreading]

Yes, Aros can date.

Yes, Aces can fuck

Yes, some aro/aces want to do these things

SOME DONT

Respect ace peoples identities because they’re identities worth respecting not because they can fuck/date or ‘write the best smut’

The whole point is that we also don’t want to be defined by these things we usually don’t do

-your local fully ace and demiro

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one of the best decisions i've ever made was to stop arguing.

i'd always been an arguer. i was defensive about everything and mindlessly contrary. it wasn't all my fault; i was (and still am) talked down to and patronized a lot, and when you live your life that way, you become kind of a raw nerve and dedicate a lot of energy to trying to prove yourself. someone even told me once, "it's just fun messing with you. you get so upset."

at 23, i was working in an environment where about a half dozen middle aged conservative men were always telling me what to do and explaining things to me. i either argued with them when they said heinous things or stewed about it for hours or even days. and so my new year's resolution one year was simply: no arguing.

it felt a little like defeat at first, like i was no longer standing up for what i believed in, even though no matter how right i was or how much proof i had for my claims, no one had ever been swayed by anything i told them. part of that was because they had no respect for me and didn't take me seriously; the other part was the simple truth that arguments are almost never productive. when someone says something and you immediately reply with, "you're wrong and here's why," a wall goes up and nothing can go over it.

i couldn't just let these men talk at me though, so i started asking questions. not leading questions, not with an intention to prove a point or walk them into a corner. i genuinely wanted to understand how they came to shape the opinions they held. i realized that understanding and agreeing are two different things, and just because i seek to understand doesn't mean i condone.

a truly fascinating thing happened: these men walked into corners all by themselves. it turns out nobody had ever actually tasked them with speaking their opinions aloud to a neutral audience. no one had ever been sincerely curious about them and their views. sure, their loved ones probably asked, "how are you doing?" all the time as a show of affection, but that's much different than, "what do you think?"

knowing what i know now, i think that's true of everyone. how many people ask you for your opinion and listen to what you have to say without speaking their opinion back to you? without judging you? how many people actively and intentionally try to understand you?

it's been over ten years since my resolution and i think i can count the arguments i've gotten into on one hand. one finger, even. it's amazing what happens when someone tries to rile you up, pick a fight with you, and your only response is, "can you elaborate on that?"

you can work someone into a very open and vulnerable state when you ask questions. they eventually run out of their usual talking points and move into the personal. when i do this, it's not like therapy; i'm not trying to help anyone. and it's not like teaching; i'm not trying to educate anyone. i just want to understand how people reach the conclusions they've come to. even after all these years of asking questions and not arguing, it still amazes me how few people in this world feel understood, and how easy it is to get them to open up when you say, "i want to know what you think."

[starryreading]

reminder to all 14-19 year olds girls. that grown man does not like you. you are a victim

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In der Weihnachtszeit gelten in Bergwerken immer besondere Sicherheitsvorkehrungen damit nicht alle Stollen gegessen werden.

[starryreading]

kicking my legs and giggling at the sleepover. can my OC who I've never drawn or talked about play with your OC who you've never drawn or talked about

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I was at my beautician's today and the topic of s*x accidentally came up (it wasn't me who mentioned it and it was just a tiny mention) and I said it wasn't on my agenda. Then she said why not, what if I walked out of there and there he would be - my prince. To which I said it wasn't gonna happen and I didn't need such "happiness".

Thank universe she didn't push further but just the mere fact of this stupid heteroamatonormativity existing is annoying as fuck. I hate it when people assume that one day I'll marry a man and have children because I hate both ideas🙄

[starryreading]

Other symbiotes: Humans are for consumption!

Venom: Eddie gave us tater tots!! :D We love Eddie.

The other symbiotes: ... for fucks sake...

[starryreading]

i feel like we don't appreciate these days how much the twin towers sucked, like, design-wise

they were contemporarily hated for just being these giant grey monoliths

like there probably could've been an easier way to get rid of them, but they probably needed to go either way

[starryreading]

Saw this at Aldi today, this is what Germany thinks US culture is like. Any Americans to confirm or deny?

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Mist

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Falls jemand "Gesellschafter von Burgerkette muss seinen Hut nehmen nachdem er eine rechtsextreme Konferenz in der Nähe des Wannsees finanziert und organisiert hat, hat bei der diskutiert wurde, wie man sich 'Ausländern' und anderer unliebsamer Bevölkerungsschichten entledigen kann" im 2024 Bingo hatte.

[Quelle]

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me, a german dependent on public transport, repeating my daily affirmations into the bathroom mirror while gripping the sink so hard it hurts: strikes are important no matter how badly they affect me strikes are important no matter how badly they affect me strikes are important no mat

[starryreading]

Das heißt Frikadelle

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Be gay do crime but in Barvaria and we're putting these everywhere

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friendly reminder, dass die Bundeszentrale für politische Bildung wertvolle arbeit leistet. und manchmal macht sich politisch bilden einfach mehr spaß, wenn man was kostenloses mit der post bekommt. aktuelle empfehlung:

(natürlich auch als kostenlose pdf verfügbar)

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[starryreading]

fellow germans, i don't know what to say anymore, was ist denn hier los