#but they either didn't fit one of the squares or i haven't worked up the nerve to comment yet

[bulkyphrase]

I had every intention of updating my @ficreadingchallenge bingo card every week, but wow I definitely did not do that.

Here's the results of my June and July reading! Maybe I'll do this again next Thursday, or maybe you'll see it again sometime in September.

Details below the cut!

For square 3: vampire AU

Oh Negative by Ladyladylady (@ladyladylady1) (Winterhawk, Mature, 17,663 words)

Summary: “Well alright then. In case it wasn’t clear, everyone is welcome here, vampires included. Anyone who has a problem with that can kindly find a new bar to haunt.” Sam emphasizes his words by pointing the end of his bat around the room, making sure to stop at Brock’s old table. No one speaks up for a beat. Then they hear a throat clear. Clint and Sam snap their heads behind them to the door they’re still blocking. On the steps leading up is a shorter man, but he and Sam are pretty tall, so that’s nothing new. More noteworthy is his chiseled jaw, his tangle of dark, shoulder-length hair, his metal arm, and the fact that he is, unmistakably, a vampire.

there are a lot of things that go wrong for clint in this true blood fusion but he does get a sexy vampire boyfriend in the end

For square 4: fluff

Blossoms Every Day by fluffernutter8 (@theawkwardterrier) (Steggy, General Audiences, 1,961 words)

Summary: When you work at a flower shop requests for elaborate bouquets are just part of the job. Requests for bouquets this specific, on the other hand...

peggy and steve communicate via the language of flowers...sort of. very cute, and love the outsider pov

For square 5: fic written by someone who follows you

Treading Desire Lines by @fohatic (Stony, Teen And Up Audiences, 43,747 words)

Summary: Tony knows that his daughter can be difficult, but he really needs someone to do him a solid when an important opportunity arises. Unfortunately, word is already out: Morgan Stark is a real handful. Never one to shrink from a challenge, Steve steps in, hoping to shift the strained dynamic between him and Tony and having no idea how the course of his life is about to change.

i'm a little cautious with kidfic and endgame fix-its, but this one really won me over!

For square 6: enemies to friends/lovers

a falling star can't fall forever by Mizzy (@mizzy2k) (James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov, Teen And Up Audiences, 30,329 words)

Summary: Corporate espionage is a dirty job, but someone has to do it. When a recent job goes awry thanks to the Black Widow, Bucky’s team are demoted to babysitting duty: Howard Stark’s spoiled brat is studying in Cambridge and is completely naive to the dangers of the world. The mission isn’t the complete bust he’s expecting: while off-duty, he meets Natasha and it’s love at first sight. If only that damn irritating Black Widow wasn’t also around, determined to ruin his latest attempt to get a life outside of the spying game. Frustrated by her recent demotion thanks to the Winter Soldier and his irritating team, the last thing Natasha expects is to meet the charming Mr. Barnes. Being reassigned to Europe to assist on a honey-pot mission should be frustrating, but with an unexpected new love on the horizon, Natasha thinks this assignment might not be as bad as she’s expecting. Except then it turns out the Winter Soldier is also in Europe, and he seems determined to completely ruin her life… (An International Iron Man meets Mr. and Mrs. Smith AU.)

i 💕 rom-com, identity porn, and spy shenanigans

For square 10: fan art

Muzzled and Bound [!Art] by @darthbloodorange (Stony, Teen And Up Audiences, words)

Summary: Greg doesn't approve of his brother dating that mutt, Rogers, so he captures the man to teach Tony a lesson.

i want to read the (nonexistent) fic so bad, but will console myself with this lovely art

For square 11: daring rescue

Die Hard (But Only If No Other Options Are Readily Available) by @jenthesweetie (Stony, Teen And Up Audiences, 23,915 words)

Summary: Tony hadn’t written off the Avengers when he ended up on the Raft. What he absolutely hadn’t expected was for them to show up to break him out.

this exciting post-age of ultron stony reconciliation fic features two daring rescues and several narrow escapes

For square 12: 5 + 1 style fic

Interruptions by mariana_oconnor (@mariana-oconnor) (Winterhawk, Teen And Up Audiences, 8,307 words)

Summary: Five times Bucky tries to tell Clint how he feels and one time Clint succeeds.

poor bucky (and clint) have the worst luck in this fic, but at least they figure it out in the end

For square 13: unfinished/work in progress (this was a WIP when I first added it to the bingo card, but it's complete now)

Factory Regress by SucculentHyena (@succulent-hyena) (Stucky, Teen And Up Audiences, 54,054 words)

Summary: A crashed ship, a mysterious device, and some unfortunate circumstances.

a very fun fic featuring age regression, magical space adventures, and protective husband bucky

For square 14: multiple authors

Never Surrender, Never Give Up by Loran_Arameri, Serinah (@loraneldin, @serinah80) (Stony, Explicit, 85,896 words)

Summary: It’s 2029 and aliens have taken the Earth. Steve is dead, and everyone who’s left of the Avengers is fighting for the last few thousand humans. They don’t have much time, or rather the energy: the last of the arc reactors will fail in less than a month, and Tony can’t make another one. Their base will fall.The Earth’s best defender is out of options. *** Years they fought against the Chitauri, and they have lost. Steve is sure that Tony would agree: only traveling back in time could save them now. But Steve wasn't sure if he should, and now he's out of time so he takes one last, desperate gamble. When will he end up?

beautifully angsty fic featuring the end of the world, time travel, double identity porn, and some very hot dom tony/sub steve

For square 15: crossover or fusion fic

Early American X-Ray Specs by aetataureate (@psychicrhubarb) (Steggy, Teen And Up Audiences, 23,183 words)

Summary: “I’m going to steal the Declaration of Independence,” Steve said.

this hilarious fic is everything a steggy + national treasure fusion should be

For square 17: reread an old fave

If Through a Door by @jibrailis (Stony, Explicit, 44,036 words)

Summary: Tony is accused of murder on an alien planet; Steve marries him to bring him home.

this canon universe marriage of convenience story with a side of alien murder mystery is one of the first stony fics i ever read

For square 18: 5+ year old fic

Sea Stars by Muccamukk (Stony, Teen And Up Audiences, 41,960 words)

Summary: Steve comes back to life somewhere entirely unexpected; Tony doesn't remember being a hero; something is rotten in the province of British Columbia, and the 2010 Olympics are doomed.

post-(comics) civil war fic where a magical resurrection meets tech-based amnesia

For square 19: mythical creature AU

Nights When the Wolves Are Silent, and Only the Moon Howls by Cluegirl, Defiler_Wyrm (art by @defilerwyrm) (Stony & Stucky, Mature, 77,612 words)

Summary: “Could you drop all that stoic shit and be my freaking-the-hell-out wingman for just like, five seconds here?” Steve wasn’t sure he could think of anything he wanted less to do than to freak out about his wounds just then though, so he reached across his chest and gingerly patted Sam’s clenched knuckles. “It’ll be fine,” he promised, believing it. “Serum’s handled worse.” “You know, I actually believe you,” Sam allowed after a long second of glaring. “Which is deeply alarming, considering how much of your connective tissue I’ve touched in the last 4 hours. Now you wanna tell me what Russoff’s men did to you that made it look like you got mauled by a bear?” Steve flinched, then breathed the memory down to size. “Not a bear,” he murmured. “Wolves.”

💖 werewolf (mcu) civil war fix-it my beloved 💖

For square 24: BIPOC main character

Fill Her (With Words of Hope For Her People) by sweetheart35 (@billyhargrovetrash) (Gen, Not Rated, 6,236 words)

Summary: Okoye delivers the news. Shuri had watched the two guards who had been assigned to guard her and the android disintegrate into dust in front of her. She had watched, frozen, as one had sighed before closing his eyes and the other turn to her and say “Princess -“ and take a step towards her before he simply collapsed, dust scattered across the floor. Shuri is a genius, the head of Wakanda’s research and development division and their outreach program but she cannot fathom what is happening.

an absolutely beautiful story about shuri leading wakanda after the snap

For square : Free space

Bird Set Free by mrs_d (Samsteve, Teen And Up Audiences, 15,361 words)

Summary: Steve thinks all hope is lost when he gets transformed into a helpless finch, but then he meets a man who smells amazing and, even better, can understand what he’s saying.

this super-cute fic features steve as a fierce but easily distracted finch and sam as a bakery shop owner who can talk to birds

[luvvyouforever]

saw your post about declan x reader x rupert and i can't stop thinking about them in their slutty little venturer tshirts ugh need to be sandwiched between them while they're bickering over who can make you feel better

ughhh the slutty venturer t-shirts! just for you anon <3

challengers - declan o'hara x reader x rupert campbell-black

synopsis: rupert believes he can make you feel better. declan disagrees and thinks he can. there's only one way to find out.

content: threesome (kinda?), afab reader, no m/m, rupert's got a thing for legs, no maud au so there's no infidelity, oral sex, handjob kinda, hickeys, praise, squirting

word count: 3k oops

author's note: this fic has been sitting in the drafts for a whileeeeeee. like before season 2 was even confirmed. enjoy! (ps i haven't watched challengers i just thought the title was fitting)

you think that maybe rupert and declan have forgotten about you sandwiched between them, but perhaps there were worse places to be than leaned against a doorframe, the heady scents of their cologne filling your nose.

"i just find it interesting that every time i come to look for our dear y/n, she's always right by your side, hmm?" rupert's posh accent echoed above you, his chest puffed.

"have you thought that she just prefers my company to yours, rupert?" declan's thick accent was so different to rupert's, but they mingled so well together. you briefly wondered how long you could still there still and quiet until they acknowledge your existence again.

"considering you're tipsy half of the day, i have reason to doubt that."

you would be standing there quietly for a long time.

it was painfully obvious to everyone, not just you, that rupert and declan harboured crushes for you. it had started when freddie managed to poach you from corinium to come work for venturer instead, and small gazes as you left turned into something you weren't even sure how to handle.

"you guys do know i'm standing here still...right?" you managed to slip out between the incessant firing off of insults.

their heads turned downwards, eyes meeting your own.

"of course, doll," declan said at the same time as rupert's, "could never forget you, sweetheart." they glared at each other, then returned to their attention to you.

it was a bit overwhelming, sure, but you held firm in your resolve to attempt to solve this issue. "i thought i could just let you both fight till you came up with a solution, but the plan has not worked evidently. and a girl can only take so much lustful staring and touches on the knee before she need something."

"i'm sorry if declan's made you uncomfortable, love," rupert said slyly, hand softly grazing your upper arm.

declan immediately lost the control he was exerting and faced rupert again with a loud scoff. "i'm making her uncomfortable? if anything, you are! who'd want a man that's slept with half the countryside giving her fuck-me-eyes?"

rupert couldn't help himself. "who'd want a man that hasn't slept with anyone in months giving her fuck-me-eyes?"

"oh, i'm sure i could make her feel much better than you ever could. just cause you're easy doesn't mean you're good."

with every word spat at each other, their shoulders squared and jaws clenched. if you didn't know any better, you'd keep watching the way their t-shirts flexed against their skin, swooning at the knowledge that it was you they were fighting over. but you had to do something.

it seemed crazy the second it popped into your brain. like something from one of those erotica books lizzie wrote. but the way rupert and declan were so naturally competitive, it might be the only way to solve this before they irreparably damaged the friendship they'd been building through venturer.

first you tried to clear your throat loudly which didn't work. they continued to mumble about their respective skills. then you tried saying their names. didn't work either. finally, with a huff of pure frustration, you grabbed each of them by the collars of their t-shirts and drug them further inside declan's home, effectively shutting the door behind you with your foot.

"jesus christ, you're like toddlers," you near-shouted. "you'd think a teacher told you that you have to share the toy the way you're arguing with each other. we have to solve this one way or another." you paused for a beat, letting the two men gather their composure. declan leaned against the kitchen counter, while rupert stood with his arms crossed. "i want you to listen to every word i have to say without speaking, okay? and when i am done, you are allowed to give me a response."

you waited for them to nod and once they did, you continued speaking.

"in full honesty, i can't choose between the two of you. you're both handsome and intelligent and i've enjoyed getting to know you. but i know you can't share. that would never work with the way you both square off like gorillas in a jungle," you said. your next words needed to be chose carefully. "however, i can't make a decision without test driving. so, we can settle this like adults in declan's bedroom, or i will walk out the door and forget that i ever found the two of you attractive in the first place."

true to their word, neither of them spoke until you gestured that you were done. declan was the first to speak up. "how long have you found me attractive, huh?"

"good lord," rupert whispered to himself, though both you and declan heard it clearly. "so when you mean settle this like adults..." he trailed off, posing a question for you to respond to.

"d'ya need her to spell it out for you?" declan asked, shoving himself off the kitchen counter. he sauntered towards you and his scent flooded your senses once again. his hand came to your lower back, dipping down just enough to graze your ass. "she wants us to prove which of us is better."

you let out a soft gasp, followed by a bite of your lip when his hand lifted then came back down on your ass, more harsh than a love tap, but clearly not as rough as he'd like to go.

declan chuckled. "think i'm already ahead of you."

"jesus, get in the bedroom already," rupert said, coming up behind you and replacing declan's hand with his own, pushing you towards the stairs.

the next few moments were a blur. before you knew it, your figure was posed on the middle of declan's bed, with declan and rupert waiting patiently at the foot.

"are there rules?" rupert asked.

you thought for a second. it was an impulsive plan, one you hadn't put much thought into. you shook your head. "nope. want you both to show me just how good you are since you're talking all that game."

declan and rupert looked at each other perhaps the most amiably the whole entire evening. while it was a competition, they seemed to have a silent agreement that your world would be forever changed after this.

declan moved first, his eyes already lowered and darkened with desire. having this view of you in his bed was driving him mad, pushing him to do that much better so he could always see you sprawled on the flannel sheets that smelled like him.

"can i take this off of you, love?" he asked quietly, fingers toying with the hem of your shirt. you met his dark brown eyes and nodded, biting your lip as his hands deftly removed the fabric. you could hear the hitch in both his and rupert's breathing.

suddenly, rupert's frame was on your other side, fingers barely touching the skin on your side. "you're so beautiful," he said. though declan made the initial move, rupert took it one step further and brought his head down to offer you a sweet kiss on the lips. declan could've growled, but he knew you wanted to end the fighting. he had to just find his own way to touch you.

as rupert continued to expertly move his lips against yours, declan's own mouth met your neck and upper chest. he left hot, open-mouthed kisses on your delicate skin and you whimpered into rupert's mouth.

declan continued his ministrations as rupert pulled away and tugged off his venturer t-shirt, revealing his toned, tan body underneath. he then slid his belt from around his waist and threw it down onto declan's carpet. he took a few seconds to figure out his next plan of action and when he saw just how enamoured you were with declan's kisses, he opted for the same strategy.

rupert leaned down and started trailing his lips along your stomach, up to the edge of your bra, around the seam, then back down again. he was careful not to invade declan's space while also losing himself in the way your noises reverberated in his ears.

declan, too, rose from kneeling and took off his own shirt. you managed to open your eyes and the sight before you could've sent you reeling immediately. rupert was toned and muscular while declan was broad and, for the lack of a better word, big. in that moment, you considered yourself the luckiest girl on the planet.

your hands flew to declan as he leant back down, fingers roaming the broad expanse of his chest. desperate to have him kiss you on the lips this time, you moved your hand to his chin and tugged him towards you. he picked up the message easily and moved his lips against yours eagerly.

so far, you distinguished that declan and rupert had two distinct styles. declan was desperate and eager and ready to take you as his own. his kisses were passionate and you could tell from his touches that he was exerting a lot of restraint. rupert, on the other hand, was more calculated. his kisses started delicate, like he was teasing you, drawing you in, making you crave more. it would be a harder decision than you thought.

once he was satisfied with the trail of kisses along your body, rupert ducked down, fingers teasing the band of your pants. you looked up at you, somehow meeting your eyes past declan's head, and asked a silent question. you nodded as best as you could, then turned back to declan. as rupert's hands tugged down your pants, revealing your bare legs, your fingers tangled in declan's curls.

you had become so lost in declan's overpowering kiss that you let out a sudden gasp when rupert's mouth met your thighs. you could feel his breath against your legs, hands squeezing your flesh. you realized his weakness then as he groaned with every inch his mouth met.

eventually, you pulled away from declan, desperate for breath. he looked at you with a powerful look, one that you could hardly tear away from. you did, though, and gestured to his pants. "don't leave me alone here," you whispered. he smirked and stood to undo his belt, then tug his pants off.

as if his arousal was not already evident, the bulge barely concealed by his boxers revealed it tenfold. your eyes roamed his body and with a smirk, your hand reached out to his core. at the sudden contact, he groaned, no, growled.

you let out your own noise of surprise at rupert's hands meeting your own middle. your eyes flew to his and he met them confidently with his own smirk.

"she's so wet for us," rupert said, drawing declan's attention towards your center. both of their eyes didn't leave your face as declan's hand reached out to feel for himself.

"absolutely soaking, doll," he added.

"please," you pleaded, though you weren't sure what you were asking for.

"what do you need, love?" rupert asked sweetly. his fingers replaced declan's and they teased past the hem of your panties.

"what would you like us to show you?" declan asked. it was evil, the way they seemed to suddenly team up with the purpose of torturing you. it was as if every ounce of their fighting left once your body was available to them.

"y-your mouth, please," you squeaked out, cheeks flushed both from embarrassment and pure heat. "you first," you added, gesturing to declan.

"don't mind if i do, pretty girl," he said, moving to situate himself between your legs. rupert went to move, but he couldn't help himself but watch as declan slowly removed your panties. "fucking gorgeous."

rupert moved to your side again, one of his arms propping up his body by yours, the other snaking around and entangling his fingers in your hair. he came in close and you could smell the spearmint on his breath from the gum he chewed. "i don't think i could ever tell you enough how beautiful you are," he whispered.

had it not been for declan's mouth being dangerously close to your pussy, you would've reeled at his romantic words. you hoped that your shining eyes would convey your appreciation enough. he seemed to have gotten the message and smiled as his hands moved to wrap around your back and undo your bra.

once you were fully bare before them, rupert offered the same vulnerability, moving upwards to take his pants and boxers down.

"fuck," you choked out, both at the sight before you and at declan's tongue licking a long stripe up your core.

rupert smiled and returned to your side again. "like what you see?" he asked, fingers curling under your chin. you nodded enthusiastically, as it became difficult to form words from declan's ministrations between your legs. you couldn't do much else but reach towards rupert's body, hands exploring the muscular build of his chest and shoulders and torso and everywhere. he offered the same, soft hands teasing up your sides and breasts.

declan's mouth was beginning to draw you close to the edge. he was close to making out with your pussy, and you were positive both he and you were soaked. despite the slight burn coming from his thick mustache, your back arched from the bed ever so slightly, offering rupert more surface to explore.

everything came crashing on you all at once, though, as declan's finger slowly entered you, curling up to the spot that made you shut your eyes so tight you saw swirls of color. to add to the torture, rupert's mouth had wrapped around your nipple, tongue teasing and slow.

"fuck!" you shouted. "s-so good. so good, declan." your praise egged him on further and he added a second finger. his tongue didn't let up until your thighs squeezed around his head and you came around his fingers with barely intelligible groans of his name.

reluctantly, he pulled away, leaving your hole clenching around nothing. you were correct about him being soaked. he was a vision of pure sin, nothing else. it had to have been one of the sexiest sights you'd ever see in your life.

"think you can do better than that?" declan asked.

rupert released his mouth with a pop and smirked. "of course i can." ever the gentleman, though, he looked at you first. "ready for me now, love?"

despite your better judgement telling you to breathe first, you nodded eagerly. they switched spots then, declan moving to your side. before he got comfortable, though, he stripped off his own boxers. you whimpered. how could you have possibly gotten this lucky?

rupert situated himself between your thighs and instead of diving in immediately like declan, he teased you with his fingers first. it was torturous, but so methodical, like he wanted to play you like an instrument. for a second, you watched him with lust blown eyes, before averting your attention to declan's hard cock just before you.

you felt greedy receiving all the pleasure from the two men. you looked at declan with the best puppy dog eyes you could muster and he chuckled lightly at your pleading. he inched closer, getting comfortable at your side.

"all yours, darling," he said quietly. you bit your lip and outstretched your hand. declan groaned as your skin met his and he was sure that he had never been so needy for someone before.

rupert's mouth finally fully latched on to your clit and you gasped instantly. your hand continued to stroke declan and he leant down to press a soft kiss to your forehead. his breath tickled your ear and his moans were like music. down below you, rupert's mouth worked expertly on your pussy, which was an entirely different sensation than declan's sloppy, but deliciously overwhelming mouth.

your thighs squeezed around his head, but it only made him that much more eager to please you. his tongue moved up and down, then teased your entrance. your stomach squeezed with the feeling of another orgasm coming on quickly.

"fuck, rupert. please keep going," you moaned out, arching your hips into his face further.

declan could feel himself getting closer too, but he didn't want to finish then and spend time gaining back his energy. he gained the strength to pull your hand away from him and offered a sweet kiss to your palm instead. he craned his neck down to place more kisses on your neck, and once he found a spot that seemed to draw an extra whimper from you, he bit down and sucked.

your moans were surely loud enough to hear across the countryside. it didn't matter though with the way declan and rupert were lavishing endless attention on you. it was the best you were sure you had ever felt. that knot in your stomach only grew tighter and you weren't going to last long.

rupert wasn't letting up, though. in fact, he copied declan's move and slipped two fingers in, curling them upwards over and over. with every pull, that knot tightened and tightened. if he didn't pull away, you were sure you'd pass out. he didn't though.

declan's mouth continued to leave hickeys down your neck and suddenly, waves of pleasure overtook every part of your senses. before you knew it, rupert's chest and torso were soaked.

"had to be such an overachiever and make her squirt?" declan asked, releasing from your neck with a harsh bite. you were breathing heavily, attempting to come down from the intense high you had been feeling. declan and rupert bickered quietly, before realizing that your head had lulled against the pillow.

"seems like i won that one, huh?" rupert asked, moving up the bed again to caress the hairs that had stuck along your forehead.

"oh, please," declan said. his large palm met your cheek and you looked at him with eyes that made him fall only deeper for you. "we haven't even fucked the pretty girl yet."

[heavens-moonlight]

𝗕𝗢𝗥𝗗𝗘𝗥𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗘𝗦 | 𝟬𝟮 : 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗕𝗨𝗧𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗙𝗟𝗬 𝗘𝗙𝗙𝗘𝗖𝗧

𝟬𝟭 : 𝗠𝗜𝗦𝗔𝗗𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗨𝗥𝗘 | 𝟬𝟯 : 𝗙𝗜𝗡𝗘 𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗘𝗦

Author’s Note: Well, here we go...The game has finally started but who will survive? As always, let me know your thoughts and all comments are greatly appreciated! ♡

The dorms are much more spacious than anticipated as Yoon-Seo and Jung-Won beeline for the sole coffee table in the middle of the room, occupying either side. You instead, opt to unceremoniously plop yourself down onto one of the sizeable bunk beds, plugging your phone in to charge, having depleted the power source earlier on the bus ride over.

With a familiar chime, the battery icon flashes, but you do a double take as you realize the bar has gone back up to more than 50%. "That's strange..." you whisper more to yourself than anyone, but Yoon-Seo hears you.

"What is?"

You flip over onto your stomach and turn your phone screen toward her. "Look." You point to the upper right corner, forefinger tapping at the yellow bar, lightning symbol on display. "I'm sure it was at 26% earlier but all of a sudden it's paused at nearly double what it was previously."

"Maybe you mixed up the percentages?" Yoon-Seo suggests.

"I don't think so..." You scratch your head in confusion as Yoon-Seo shrugs, neither of you having a clue in the slightest.

"Electronics are good when they work," Jung-Won says, padding over to the chair by your head where Yoon-Seo left her backpack. You place the phone face-down on the nightstand and see her slip a small gift box inside the unzipped bag, making a shushing motion with her pointer finger against her lips. Smiling, you mimic the locking of a key and throw it away behind you, keeping Yoon-Seo's birthday surprise between the two of you. "Ugh, I need to take a coding lecture but my laptop's failing to connect to the internet."

Yoon-Seo scoots her back against the side railing of your bed and crosses her arms, tsking at Jung-Won. "You keep badgering me nonstop for reading, but who else except you would willingly study during a school trip?" Yoon-Seo shakes her head. "Stop acting like the top of the class, Madame Mensa."

Jung-Won doesn't look up from her laptop screen, monotonously correcting the nickname. "Mensa is the name of the organization. You're supposed to say Mensan for the people. How many times do I have to tell you?"

You laugh at the habitual repartee between them, but get cut off by a ding signaling an incoming notification. Peering over Yoon-Seo's shoulder, you eye as an app materializes on her home screen, one you don't recognize nor have you ever seen it in the default bundle all phones come with.

"Jung-Won, what's this? I said I don't need it."

"It's really not me. I haven't touched your phone at all."

Curious, you grab your own phone and glance down at it, the same little round-edged square making its appearance. "Yoon-Seo, I have it too. Neither of us downloaded it or scanned the QR code when we arrived."

[ ᴡᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇ. ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴀғɪᴀ ɢᴀᴍᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇɢɪɴ sʜᴏʀᴛʟʏ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ᴘʀᴏᴄᴇᴇᴅ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴄʜᴇᴄᴋɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀssɪɢɴᴇᴅ ᴏᴄᴄᴜᴘᴀᴛɪᴏɴ. ]

"Mafia game?" As you touch the screen, an envelope unfurls following animation. "Wasn't this what they were playing earlier on the bus?"

"Yeah..." Yoon-Seo confirms distractedly, verifying her own occupation. "I guess I'm a civilian, not that I expected to be anything else. How about you guys?"

"I'm also a civilian."

[ ʜᴀɴ sᴇᴏʟ-ʜᴡᴀ ɴɪᴍ, ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴏʟᴇ ɪs ᴀ ᴅᴏᴄᴛᴏʀ. ]

"Me too," you fib, hoping that it wouldn't be questioned. You weren't a very good liar to begin with and hoped this would pass. Maybe there would be a reward for winning the game, but either way, at least you knew your closest friends were on the same side as you.

Still, for some odd reason, it didn't seem fit for you to reveal your real character. Being a doctor seemed too important of a role to just go around telling everyone willy-nilly. The three of you rarely kept secrets from one another, and so you trusted that a white lie for the game this one time could be forgiven.

Before any of you can discuss the odd happenings of the unexpected game further, paragraphs pop up in successive order, outlining the standard rules:

𝟣) ᴀʟʟ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴄɪᴘᴀɴᴛs ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛʟʏ ᴀssɪɢɴᴇᴅ ᴀs ᴀ ᴄɪᴛɪᴢᴇɴ, ᴅᴏᴄᴛᴏʀ, ᴘᴏʟɪᴄᴇ ᴏғғɪᴄᴇʀ, ᴏʀ ᴀ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴀғɪᴀ. ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴏᴄᴛᴏʀ ᴄᴀɴ ᴘʀᴇᴠᴇɴᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇxᴇᴄᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏғ ᴀɴʏ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴄɪᴘᴀɴᴛ ᴛʜᴇʏ sᴇᴇ ғɪᴛ, ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴏʟɪᴄᴇ ᴍᴀʏ ᴄᴏɴғɪʀᴍ ᴀ ᴘʟᴀʏᴇʀ's ɪᴅᴇɴᴛɪᴛʏ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ᴄʜᴏᴏsɪɴɢ.

𝟤) ғʀᴏᴍ ᴇɪɢʜᴛ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏʀɴɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴍɪᴅɴɪɢʜᴛ, ᴀʟʟ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴇs ᴡɪʟʟ ᴅɪsǫᴜᴀʟɪғʏ sᴜsᴘᴇᴄᴛᴇᴅ ᴍᴀғɪᴀ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀs ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ᴠᴏᴛɪɴɢ.

𝟥) ᴏɴᴄᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄʟᴏᴄᴋ sᴛʀɪᴋᴇs ᴛᴡᴇʟᴠᴇ, ᴛʜᴇ ᴘʟᴀʏᴇʀ ᴠᴏᴛᴇᴅ ʙʏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴀᴊᴏʀɪᴛʏ ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ᴇxᴇᴄᴜᴛᴇᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ᴏᴄᴄᴜᴘᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ʀᴇᴠᴇᴀʟᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴀʟʟ ʀᴇᴍᴀɪɴɪɴɢ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴄɪᴘᴀɴᴛs.

𝟦) ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ᴠᴏᴛɪɴɢ ᴄʟᴏsᴇs ᴀɴᴅ ᴀ ᴘʟᴀʏᴇʀ ʜᴀs ʙᴇᴇɴ ᴄᴏɴᴅᴇᴍɴᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴇxᴇᴄᴜᴛɪᴏɴ, ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴏɴᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ɢᴏ ᴛᴏ sʟᴇᴇᴘ ᴀsɪᴅᴇ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴀғɪᴀ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ.

𝟧) ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴏɴᴇ ɪs ɪɴ sʟᴜᴍʙᴇʀ, ᴍᴀғɪᴀ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀs ᴍᴜsᴛ ᴇxᴇᴄᴜᴛᴇ sᴏᴍᴇᴏɴᴇ ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ᴅᴀᴡɴ.

𝟨) ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ɪɴ ᴍɪɴᴅ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ ᴡʜᴏ ᴀʀᴇ ᴄɪᴠɪʟɪᴀɴ, ᴅᴏᴄᴛᴏʀ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴏʟɪᴄᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀᴍᴇ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ. ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴇɪᴛʜᴇʀ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ ᴄɪᴠɪʟɪᴀɴs ᴏʀ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ ᴍᴀғɪᴀ ᴏᴠᴇʀʀᴜɴs ᴛʜᴇ ɢʀᴏᴜᴘ, ᴛʜᴇ ɢᴀᴍᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴇɴᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡɪɴɴᴇʀ ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅᴇᴅ.

[ ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ғɪɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴀғɪᴀs ᴀɴᴅ ʙᴇɢɪɴ ᴄᴀsᴛɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴠᴏᴛᴇs. ]

You're still trying to wrap your head around the summarized instructions, sensing that there was much more to the game than meets the eye. Why was there no outlining of the individual tasks required for those with specialized occupations? How many of you were assigned to each role? What happens after execution?

Jung-Won's voice interrupts your thoughts, the thread of worries pausing in its unending tangling inside your mind. "If you push a name, a vote gets cast apparently."

"You elected someone already...?" It was quite obvious how much Eun-Ha pushed for Yool determinedly in the group chat, and reluctantly, you and Yoon-Seo follow suit, knowing full-well Yool's obsession with the game and his caliber for winning streaks.

Pensively, you start scrolling through the partakers' list, seeing your classmates' yearbook photos, including your own. Being the overthinker that you are, your mind starts spinning with all of the possibilities on how this game could end, but you had no clue why it even began in the first place. The awareness of budding anxiousness courses through you as a slight breeze from the window sends goosebumps raising on your arms at the late revelation. "But guys...why does this app have our identifiers?"

Yoon-Seo turns to you, eyebrows knit together in agreement. "Right. We didn't even sign up earlier. Who granted them access to gather this protected information?"

Jung-Won bites at her nails, eyes shifting back and forth across her phone screen, the glare of its light reflecting off her glasses. "The internet isn't working either. How are we able to play the game anyway?"

Silence encases the vicinity around your trio, no one knowing what to say to the other, all questions remaining unvoiced and unanswered.

"Why don't we go back down to the lobby and see if there's anyone we can ask?" you propose, Jung-Won and Yoon-Seo readily assenting.

The reception desk as you head downstairs is as empty as it was the moment you came in, maybe even more so as reticence settles over the expansive building, the sky having gone ominously dark from a single look out the glass doors of the entrance.

"Our teacher hasn't come back yet? He left so long ago..." Yoon-Seo walks around the reception desk, circling for any clues. "Nothing could've happened, right?"

"What if he got into an accident?" Jung-Won states bluntly, drumming her fingers against the marble countertop.

"Yah, don't say it like that..." you warn. "Words can be dangerous. You don't know what it can subject someone to."

Before Jung-Won can list more outrageous possibilities, Jun-Hee sidles up on the opposite side of the counter where you're spinning back and forth in the chair slowly, lost in thought.

"Hey Jun-Hee, do you know when Seonsaengnim will be back?" Yoon-Seo directs at him while she flips through the binder of contacts placed beside you. "These numbers aren't what we need at all. They're just for the retreat center's use like maintenance and all that."

Jun-Hee shakes his head. "I can't reach him." He pulls out his phone, only to sigh and slip it back inside his pocket. "Are any of your guys' devices working?"

"We don't even have service." You look around once more, surveying areas within your eyesight in case any adults would spontaneously reappear. "Shouldn't there be at least one staff member or at the very least a security guard on patrol at night?"

"I guess they all went with our teacher." Jun-Hee walks up next to you and settles down on the counter to your left.

You raise an eyebrow. "Every single one of them? They didn't think to have anybody stay behind as a chaperone?"

"Well, when you put it that way..." Jun-Hee begins. "It does seem a little unnecessary for all of them to up and leave."

"Then, what do we do now? How long do we wait?" Jung-Won stares at the clock ticking away. "It's barely nine o'clock. Surely, it wouldn't take him twice as long to pick up the others and return here, right?"

"There must be a phone in the staff lounge," Yoon-Seo stops her rummaging around under the desk long enough to say. "Jung-Won, let's go and search there."

"You're leaving me here alone?"

"Not alone," Yoon-Seo waggles her eyebrows so only you can see. "With Jun-Hee, of course."

Jung-Won conceals her smile behind her hand not so discreetly and begins to drag Yoon-Seo away. As they pass, Yoon-Seo pats Jun-Hee on the shoulder and cautions him. "If she gets lost, you'll be in big trouble."

He turns to her. "You've known me since we were babies, who do you take me for?"

Yoon-Seo merely ignores him and follows Jung-Won upstairs happily, an extra spring in her step, making it known how proud she was of herself. Rolling your eyes unnoticeably at their less than subtle tactics, you could only hope they were actually going to find a phone and not saying that purely for reasons of ulterior motives.

The hush after is stifling without the buffer of Yoon-Seo and Jung-Won. Jun-Hee is staring straight at you, hands bracing the counter on either side of him waiting for you to say something, but you're staring down at the floor, purposefully refusing to make eye contact.

"Are you mad at me?"

That was the last thing you expected him to say. "Of course not." You look up at him briefly, but what a mistake that was. With you lowered in the chair and him sitting up on the raised desk, your eyes meet his lips first and your mind automatically reels back to the kiss on the bus. Darting your eyes back to your lap immediately after draws out a weary sigh from Jun-Hee.

"Even now you can't look straight at me. At least tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it." When you're thinking of what to reply with, Jun-Hee grabs the chair's armrests by your sides and pulls you in closer, leaning his head down so that his form towers over yours. With nowhere else to look now, you're forced to gaze upward and the expression on his face has your stomach tightening in knots, guilty. "Now you're finally looking at me." A beat passes before Jun-Hee's eyes become downturn. "I'm sorry."

Your gaze softens as you glance into his dark brown eyes, seeing your own image in his irises. "I'm the one that should be sorry." You place your hands that were settled in your lap onto his forearms, and he instantly gazes down at the contact before looking back to you, his attention unwavering. "Don't ever apologize to me when you didn't do anything wrong, Jun-Hee."

His eyes dart back and forth between your own, questioning. "Then why have you been avoiding me? Did something happen while I was sleeping earlier on the bus? If there is or I made you uncomfortable in any way—"

"No, no, it's nothing like that," you're quick to salvage the situation and dismiss the notion entirely, even though he couldn't have been more spot on. He had always been an observant person. This you knew too well.

I didn't want you to find out my feelings for you and lose you as a friend all in one.

Instead of the full truth, you tell him only half of it. "I didn't want you to find out how tired I felt and have you worrying over me. I know you're the class president with greater, more important responsibilities, but I also know, above anyone else, that I can't burden you with my troubles just because I'm your friend."

"Seol-Hwa, even then, you could've told me." His hands move to rest on your shoulders. "You'll always be my top priority." In a much quieter voice he says, "And I'll always worry about you."

"Jun-Hee..."

He looks you dead in the eyes, expression open and filled with warmth. "I don't like when you're sad. You look the prettiest when you smile." You don't even get a chance to get a word in before Jun-Hee plows on, turning his head away slightly. If you didn't know better, you'd think he was abashed to be saying the things he did. "In the gymnasium earlier, you were laughing so carefree with Yoon-Seo. It's been a while since I've seen you like that with me. I can only be happy if you're happy..." He's almost sulking, his countenance like that of a kicked puppy.

You laugh genuinely, your head hitting the back of the chair. "Kim Jun-Hee, are you jealous of my friendship with Yoon-Seo right now?"

"I got you to smile this time!" He grins back brightly at you and the two of you sit there looking at one another, neither grin dropping. The soft exhalation of his laughter trickles into your ears once again, Jun-Hee being so content with having you in his presence, and you bask in how happy the sound makes you. Any previously existing tension disintegrates in an instant, and oddly enough, you feel closer to him than ever.

The moment gets cut short when a text from the app's group chat comes in, a start contrast to the discussion earlier, votes having already pooled in for Heo Yool.

[ 💬 sᴏ-ᴍɪ: ʟᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴏɴ-sᴇᴏ, ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴏᴏʟ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀɴɴᴇx. ɪᴛ's ᴜʀɢᴇɴᴛ. ]

The oddly specific and demanding tone of the message irked you to no end. "What is this about?" Never once have you seen So-Mi try to interact with your friend group voluntarily.

Jun-Hee waves his hand dismissively. "For the event tomorrow, we're interviewing everyone about the trip and the general experience."

"Even in this situation?" you ask incredulously.

Jun-Hee chuckles. "You know how So-Mi is." His eyebrows lift pointedly.

You pat his thigh accidentally, having missed his knee entirely and feel the muscles tense beneath your hand although he doesn't move away. "Don't you find it odd?"

Jun-Hee tilts his head, equal parts confused and curious. "About...?"

"Everything." You gesture around. "The lost signal, the disappearance of supposedly responsible adults, this automatically installed app that has our personal data, and the mafia game we're all in even though we didn't choose to play?"

Jun-Hee mulls it over for a second. "I honestly have no idea what's going on." He ruffles your head affectionately. "But don't worry so much. I'm certain once morning comes, everything will be alright."

"I sure hope so."

Your conversation quietens as heavy footsteps pad across the glossed floors and you squint to see the figure in the distance.

"Joo-Won?"

Jun-Hee turns around at your discovery and notices your classmate's bloody nose, a spark of recognition flashing across his eyes. "Where are you going?"

Joo-Won looks from Jun-Hee to you, and back again nervously, seemingly deciding whether he should say something or not. "W-Well, the guys wanted to see me for a second. So..." he stammers out.

You frown, knowing of the relentless bullying Kyung-Jun's group puts him and Da-Bum through.

"Wait there," Jun-Hee directs, hopping off the desk, and Ju-Won picks at his fingers, clearly on edge at the impending encounter.

"Be careful," you add in as an afterthought before he can leave.

"I will, now that I have you fretting over me." Jun-Hee smirks cheekily.

"I'm being serious, Jun-Hee." You fix him with a stern but caring gaze. "Try to be less confrontational. It won't be good for you or Ju-Won to get on Kyung-Jun's bad side."

He nods, understanding. "I'll try my best." Waving, he begins to lead Ju-Won away, the latter shuffling after with his head down pitifully. "I'll see you soon. Don't go anywhere where I can't reach you!" Your eyes trail after their distancing forms, agitatedly until you can no longer hear their footsteps echoing down the hall.

Not even a full minute has gone by before Yoon-Seo and Jong-Won show up again, trudging down the same stairs they climbed up less than an hour ago. Judging by their walk and the look on their faces, their search must've proved unsuccessful.

"Nothing came up?" You fall into place with the two as your all make way toward the pool.

"The phone lines..." Yoon-Seo begins, dishearteningly. "None of them worked. Every single ring had us fooled."

You stare at her in shock. "But—"

"We tried contacting 119 and even picking up incoming calls immediately, but no one answered." Jung-Won hangs her head despondently.

"This trip is starting to take a very wrong turn..." you hypothesize out loud. You don't even get to explain to Yoon-Seo and Jung-Won your reasoning before Na-Hee comes by, skipping over joyfully, oblivious on how to read the room.

"You all came." Na-Hee grabs your hand and Jung-Won's in each of her own, motioning with her head toward Yoon-Seo to enter. "Yoon-Seo, you should head inside." Without questioning it, Yoon-Seo does as she's told.

You slip your hand out of Na-Hee's nippily, and her smile wanes faintly, somewhat hurt. Hyun-Ho had confided in you that he liked her, but given what you knew about Na-Hee, you weren't fond of the idea. Not wanting to disappoint him, you don't say anything when he brings her up, but the things she has been a bystander for following in So-Mi's schemes never sat right with you. Silently, you hope that one day Na-Hee would come to her senses for Hyun-Ho's sake, but you've been proven wrong time and time again.

"Are these solo interviews or what?" you inquire curtly.

"They want to record Yoon-Seo first. You can come in a bit later."

"Can't be that special of footage." Jung-Won pulls you by the elbow, sidestepping Na-Hee and pushing the doors open of her own volition.

You're met with So-Mi, Ji-Soo, Yu-Jun, and Woo-Ram, all crowding around Yoon-Seo and singing her happy birthday with a makeshift cake comprised of stacked choco-pies.

So-Mi steps forward, offering Yoon-Seo the sweets and urging her to blow out a single measly candle that wasn't even lit beforehand.

"Since when have you done stuff like this? You barely give her the time of day." Jung-Won eyes So-Mi suspiciously, voicing your same exact thoughts.

Yoon-Seo is way too nice, proceeding to thank So-Mi. You, on the other hand, didn't buy into the latter's nice girl act whatsoever, and clearly, neither did Jung-Won.

So-Mi shoots Yoon-Seo a saccharine smile. "Don't mention it. We should celebrate since we're friends." The word doesn't roll off her tongue easily, openly not a genuine desire. "We brought a present too." You narrow your eyes at the group as they're trying to hide their shrewd smiles, albeit unsuccessfully. "Let's start with a birthday beating and plunge!"

Instantaneously, you try to drag Yu-Jun, leaving Jung-Won to fend off Woo-Ram, away from Yoon-Seo with no luck. More force would just topple all three of them straight into the water. You didn't particularly care if the boys fell to the very bottom depths of the pool, but Yoon-Seo shouldn't get soaked, no less on the night of her birthday. She didn't deserve this horrible of a treatment for simply being too trusting, genuinely wanting to see good in everyone with no ounce of judgment or malice.

So-Mi guffaws hysterically in the background, bent over clutching her stomach like the sight is the funniest thing she's ever witnessed. "Put her down," she orders in between giggles, wiping away a tear from her eye. "She's about to cry." Standing akimbo, she bites back her sneer, turning to the rest. "We went too far, didn't we?"

"You think?!" Jung-Won rounds on her, eyes blazing with anger.

You haul Yoon-Seo back up to her feet as the boys scatter, high-fiving. As she stands up again after you've barely let go of her hands, So-Mi swiftly shoves her over backwards, sending her diving into the water with a loud splash, droplets flying every which way.

"Are you crazy? How could you do that?!" Jung-Won kneels next to you by the edge of the pool, watching as Yoon-Seo resurfaces.

"You ok?" You reach out a hand to her, close enough that she can grip your fingertips.

"Yeah, I will be."

You breathe a sigh of reprieve, but it's rather short-lived when Yoon-Seo starts kicking madly underwater, her arms and legs flailing before she sinks beneath, no longer visible.

"Yoon-Seo!" you shout, but hear no response.

"What a funny 'prank' to you guys, huh?" Jung-Won yells crossly at So-Mi's group, everyone standing shell-shocked. How they have the conscience to even feel the tiniest bit of remorse is beyond your understanding.

The group tries to urge Woo-Ram to go in, but in hindsight, being on the receiving end of the prank didn't seem so appealing anymore.

Livid, you turn around to heave So-Mi backwards and she goes tumbling to the ground, the silver platter she was holding in one hand clattering and smashing cake crumbs all over her. For whatever reason, Ji-Soo is still recording, but you could care less about the captured situation. "Be glad it's not the pool I pushed you into." She's stunned enough that she can't find it in her to form words.

Na-Hee opens her mouth, outwardly wanting to apologize, but swallows the excuses when you glare at her in turn. "I was right about you all along. You'll never change."

You kick your shoes off and jump in after Yoon-Seo without hesitation, Jung-Won screaming for you in the background. Thankfully, Yoon-Seo is still conscious, but scarcely, and you manage to guide her toward the rungs of the poolside ladder. Jung-Won yanks Yoon-Seo up and over the edge, throwing a hand down to you.

"Yoon-Seo lost her shoes. I saw them earlier but couldn't reach them, so let me retrieve them too."

Jung-Won looks into the chasmic pool apprehensively, more concerned after what happened, but nods in acknowledgment, going back to propping Yoon-Seo up. "Come back quickly, Seol-Hwa."

Everyone is huddling around Yoon-Seo while you plunge back under, holding your breath comfortably as you grab her sneakers. Right as you're swimming on the path of return, something cold clamps onto your leg, refusing to let go. The vice-like grip tightens, pulling you downward to drown in darkness. No matter how hard you kick, you can't resurface due to the invisible power.

"Seol-Hwa!" Jung-Won calls out to you, frightened. "I'm going to get help, hang on!"

The last thing you see are spindly, mottled, black fingers, color washed out grey in the lighting; something sinister and otherworldly. As it curls tighter around your ankle, so too does your chest constrict, the coldness of the touch seeping into your bones and you find the sense of prior trepidation returning in full force before everything sinks into oblivion.

Lungs burning and head throbbing, you open your eyes groggily, the pristine white walls of the infirmary slowly coming into focus. In the bed next to yours, Yoon-Seo is still asleep.

The digits on your left hand are numb, and you look over to see Jun-Hee gripping it like a lifeline, head resting atop his arm by your knees. Your body protests as you turn on your side, muscles stiff, trying to draw your hand free. Reaching out, you card your fingers tenderly through his hair, the ends still yet to dry. Did he jump in?

After a while, he wakes up with a start, eyes flickering to your face. A shaky sigh of relief escapes him seeing the tiniest of smiles from you, any prior sense of unrest vanishing.

"Are you in pain at all?" He cradles the back of your head, helping you sit up as you dangle your legs over the bed's edge, seated knee to knee with him.

"How long have you been here with me?" You sweep the fallen fringe away to the outlines of his face, fingers lingering against his forehead. "You should've gotten changed at least." Your hand falls back to your lap when you can see his eyes better, unshielded. "You'll grow sick at this rate, Jun-Hee."

"Says the one I'm stressing over."

"I'm fine now," you assure.

"Why didn't you wake me up as soon as you came to? Do you know how terrified I was?" His brows are furrowed in concern still, and you lift your hand again to smooth the crease lines away.

"But you rescued me," you speak quietly.

"I thought you were dying in front of me and that I wouldn't be able to save you in time. I can't lose you; do you know that?" His hand comes up to cup your face delicately, barely daring to touch it wholly, almost afraid you would disappear if he did. "You're someone I can absolutely cannot let go of." You don't realize you're crying until Jun-Hee runs his thumb over your cheek, wiping away the twin trails of tears. You're not usually one to cry, but in this moment, you were overcome with emotions. "Why are you crying?"

"I was worried. Not for me, but for you." His hands are shaking where they're pressed against your face. You put your hand over his, expecting him to pull away at your next words. "I know you like to avoid the water as much as you can after..." you trail off, teardrops still falling. "You willingly jumped in to save me when I know how deep-seated your fear runs."

He smiles sadly at you. "I found out that the care I have for you outweighs any of my existing fears." His hands have stopped shaking and you drag them down, yours coming along with it to hold them together. "I told you earlier to not go someplace where I can't reach you but after this, I'm willing to follow you to the ends of the earth. Even in death, as long as it's with you, I wouldn't mind the thought."

Your heart stutters in your chest at the sincerity of his words, and you know that your feelings for him would never fade. Not in this lifetime. "Jun-Hee..."

"Seol-Hwa? Jun-Hee?" Yoon-Seo's trembling voice has the both of you looking in her direction, but Jun-Hee is yet to release your hand.

"Yoon-Seo..." you reply, eased now that she's awoken. "How are you feeling?"

"I can't recall what happened at all." She holds her head, staring blankly ahead. "But somehow, I find I'd rather not remember." Yoon-Seo moves over to sit on your cot, back-to-back with you. The warmth radiating from her is welcoming. "Seol-Hwa, thanks for always being there. You're a good person through and through."

"Tell that to yourself." You smile and lean your head back against hers. "What are friends for?"

"Saving one another's lives now apparently," Jun-Hee jokes, lightening the atmosphere.

"Then I owe you one," Yoon-Seo continues. "I'll be your Superwoman next time."

"You and Jun-Hee really are like one another. What did you both do together when you were babies to make you fearless like this?" you question, exasperatedly fond. "Readily giving up your life for another person?"

"Only because we know you'd do the same. That kind of sincerity comes once in a lifetime."

The door creaks open just as Yoon-Seo ends her sentence, So-Mi's group filing in self-consciously, Jung-Won leading them in with her arms crossed.

"Apologize," Jun-Hee states emotionlessly. "Right now," he emphasizes, leaving no room for argument. "Pranks are supposed to be harmless, not harmful."

So-Mi grimaces at his harsh tone. "I'm sorry," she's quick to apologize. "Seol-Hwa."

She's not looking directly at you but past to the side of you, gaze straying to your hand in Jun-Hee's where he's absentmindedly rubbing circles with his thumb into your palm, not aware of his own actions. One corner of So-Mi's lip twitches, but aside from that, she doesn't comment on it. If the others have noticed, they don't say anything either.

"I'm not the one this should be reserved for."

You see her bite her tongue, annoyed at having to repeat herself once again, but not yet dropping her fake performance. Plastering on the most pitiful puppy eyes she can conjure up, she shifts her attention to Yoon-Seo, still pale. "I do feel guilty. We truly just wanted to wish you a happy birthday." So-Mi forces the waterworks on, squeezing one teardrop out at a time.

"I don't think I've ever been pushed into a pool as a birthday present before," Jung-Won mutters not so quietly under her breath.

Yoon-Seo elbows her subtly. "It's okay. Don't cry, So-Mi."

You and Jung-Won both whip your heads toward Yoon-Seo, in pure disbelief. Neither of you would've accepted that half-baked, insincere apology.

"Really?" So-Mi's eyes widen on cue, as if she didn't expect Yoon-Seo to be so pardoning. "Will you forgive us?"

"Of course, I accept. I'm alright now, so let's just put it in the past."

Jung-Won doesn't attempt to hide her distaste as she groans aloud. "Yep, totally fine. You just almost went and saw King Sejong is all."

"That's enough," Yoon-Seo whisper-yells.

"Alright, everyone out," Joon-Hee cuts in, feeling the tension in the room. "We'll all talk later."

So-Mi is the first to leave, unmistakably irritated and shamed at the same time. No matter how hard she tries to mask it, you see right through her well-crafted persona. Na-Hee lingers, the last one to exit. Before the door slams shut, she catches your eye, but in finding a look of indifference staring back at her, she turns away without saying a word, the light from the hallway dimming once more.

"That wench spilled crocodile tears."

"Jung-Won ah," Yoon-Seo expresses tiredly. "She said she was sorry."

"I don't care. It wasn't genuine. She acts up because you're the only one that gives way to her."

Yoon-Seo gets up to drag Jung-Won away and out into the hall as the latter begins to raise her voice. Their conversation lowers, but you can hear the last bit of it as they step outside.

"What would you like me to do then?"

"You don't have to do anything," Jung-Won reasons. "I'm only saying I don't tolerate her or her victim mentality, and neither should you."

"Shouldn't we head out too?" You turn to Jun-Hee.

He shakes his head lightly. "Stay and rest a bit more."

"I really am fine." You give his hand a squeeze in affirmation. Despite saying so, you continue to shiver in only your thin white button-up still damp in random patches from being submerged earlier.

Jun-Hee opens the backpack by his feet and tugs out his uniform cardigan, wrapping it around your shoulders. "Here, put this on. You're still cold to the touch."

"Then what about you? Sitting in wet clothes isn't comfortable."

"I have extras I brought with me." Jun-Hee's name tag still pinned to the sweater falls into his line of vision and he can't help smiling to himself that you haven't noticed it's positioned right over your heart. "Plus, it looks better on you anyway."

"It what?" You lean forward, tilting your ear in his direction, not sure if you heard correctly or if they were still water-logged.

"Nothing," Jun-Hee evades, suppressing his smile. It seemed too far-fetched a thing for him to say in either circumstance, so you leave it be, not wanting to wander down the winding paths of your own thoughts. He crouches down and draws the heel of your socked foot to rest on his knee, his free hand untying the laces of your shoes placed to the side.

"I can do it myself," you tell him, flustered from all the attention you were receiving.

Without looking up, Jun-Hee proceeds to put your sneakers on your feet. "I know you can." He goes so far as to knot them tight, tying bows on both sides. "But I want to do it for you." His fingers reach out to trace the shoelaces all the way to the ends of the aglets, remembrance in his eyes.

Embarrassed, you put your feet back on the ground but he looks up at you, eyes twinkling with mischief. "You kept them."

"Of course, I did." You gaze down at your shoes. "You gave them to me."

His own white sneakers come into view, and you wonder why you never noticed his laces, dyed in your favorite color, and yours in his own. "So did I. I didn't think you would."

"Why not?" You toe his shoes with yours. "Just because we made them during summer camp a few years back? A gift is a gift," you reply, nearly pouting.

He laughs at the faux cross tone of your voice, but as his eyes trail upward, the sound chokes and dies off at the end. "Uh...your shirt's now see-through..." He coughs awkwardly and stands up, looking away, a slight tinge of pink dusting his cheeks. "I'll see you out there." Jun-Hee picks up his backpack, hurriedly slinging it over one shoulder before turning to look back at you once more before leaving.

Only a short bit of time has passed, but the moment you step back out with Jun-Hee's cardigan on, you slam straight into Hyun-Ho. He steadies you by the upper arms, eyes widening upon seeing you. "Seol-Hwa!" Before you can react, he throws his arms around you and gives you the most suffocating of hugs, larger form squeezing you tight as his arms encase you, rocking back and forth.

"Hyun-Ho. Can't. Breathe." Your voice comes out punctuated, every pause a ragged intake of air.

He lets go soon after, yanking your head every which way to assess for any injuries.

"Ouch!" you exclaim. Hyun-Ho doesn't know how to control his strength so every pat comes out more like slaps. "Alright!" You try to push his hands away but they're hell bent on checking your well-being. "Ok! That's enough!" You say with finality, laughter bubbling up as your cousin continues to shake you around like a rag-doll. "Yah! If I didn't have any bruises, I sure do now!"

Hyun-Ho steps back, chiding. "Where's the thank you, huh?"

"For giving me new injuries?"

"Is that how you repay me?" Hyun-Ho scoffs. "I was the one who found you in the pool first."

"Y-You were?!" You splutter. "How come no one told me?"

"I said I found you. I wasn't the one who saved you." He shrugs like it was common knowledge.

"Aish." You shove his shoulder but he stands his ground, not budging an inch. "And you're thick-skinned enough to request a word of thanks?"

"Obviously." He flicks you on the forehead, drawing a scowl from you. "I went and got Jun-Hee for you."

"Ok, and...?" You're more baffled than ever.

"Geez, this ungrateful brat." Hyun-Ho tries but fails to hide his smirk. "Who do you think handed you over so you could be carried by Jun-Hee all the way to the infirmary?"

"What?!"

"You looked more comfortable in his arms than on my back, but really, it was no big deal." He shrugs. "All in a day's work for me."

"You—" you point a finger at him, gawking and at a loss for words.

"Also, nice change of outfit by the way." He raps his forefinger on Jun-Hee's nameplate, nails clacking on the piece of plastic. "I know it's your favorite brand."

You gasp as you finally notice, immediately unpinning the white rectangle and slipping it in your skirt pocket. "I'm going to kill him," you mutter under your breath.

"Why not kiss him instead?" Hyun-Ho jests, knowing well enough by now to evade your incessant slaps to his back, running down the hallway as you give chase after.

The two of you come to a stop when the rest of your classmates congregate from the other end of the hallway where Jun-Hee and So-Mi were making an announcement about retiring for the night and trying to contact the teacher again tomorrow morning.

Yoon-Seo taps your shoulder from behind and tilts her phone screen toward you where a timer has popped up.

Before anyone can so much as take a step toward their rooms, the intercom comes to life.

[ ᴠᴏᴛɪɴɢ ᴇɴᴅs ɪɴ ᴏɴᴇ ᴍɪɴᴜᴛᴇ. ]

With everything that has happened since you got here, the mafia game had slipped from your mind.

Suddenly, Yoon-Seo's meter starts counting down from 59 seconds, and with the ding comes a renewed sense of excitement from everyone around you, sleep long forgotten.

While Yool and his friends incessantly chatter away, trying to place blame on one another in good fun, you're the exception. Questioning the origins of the game, you feel a sense of foreboding, an ill-omened current in the air. You were known among your friends to have good instincts, but you hope against all hope that this time, your intuition wouldn't be true.

Jun-Hee walks over beside you, placing a hand on your shoulder that makes you jump out of your skin. "Seol-Hwa...? Did you hear anything I said?"

Hands trembling, you grip onto the rolled-up sleeve cuff of his shirt. "I...don't think we should've voted."

You eye the shaking numbers on Jun-Hee's phone screen, growing shades redder by the minute as it nears zero. He doesn't get a chance to reply as successive announcements come in.

[ ᴛʜᴇ ᴠᴏᴛɪɴɢ ʜᴀs ᴄᴏɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇᴅ. ʜᴇᴏ ʏᴏᴏʟ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏsᴛ ᴠᴏᴛᴇs ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ᴇxᴇᴄᴜᴛᴇᴅ. ]

Seconds later, Yool lets out a guttural scream of agony, clutching the side of his head.

"Oi, look at this kid. Gosh, he's just begging for attention again," Eun-Ha utters with clarity, unfazed by Yool's prankster tendencies. While everyone laughs at her statement and his actions, you study his face contorted in pain, veins popping up in his neck.

That kind of intensity isn't for show.

"Jun-Hee...Something's not right," you undertone tremulously, fingers slackening from the grip you had on him. The moment those words leave your lips, Yool falls to the ground, slumped over.

As his friends crowd around, Jun-Hee is rooted to the spot, intertwining your hand with his, holding on tight. You can tell he wants to go help as well, but he keeps throwing glances down at you and ultimately decides against it.

A sickening cracking sound has you sliding your eyes slowly over to see Yool's neck snapping rearward, the rest of his body contorting into a standing position in descending parts. Like a puppet controlled on a string, his limbs bend in odd angles, much more grotesque and inhumane compared to his earlier stint in the gymnasium. As his head straightens again, screams ring out down the length of the hallway.

You press yourself against the wall, finding it hard to breathe as you look directly into Yool's rolled eyes, now completely white, no irises in sight.

The White Butterfly's Murder.

You knew. You knew that butterflies were often seen in the spring as a divination of death, a harbinger of impending demise if it were to encircle someone while in flight. But to have it be white, the color of innocence yet also the color of surrender, you can't help but to wonder if these were all signs you should've heeded. Would we still have ended up here?

Eyes are windows to the soul, they say. Here, you realize, now stands a soulless individual.

Eun-Chan and Yeon-Woo have both fallen to the floor in a heap, staring up at their now unrecognizable friend with nothing but absolute fear in their expressions.

A mindless Yool throws himself side to side, intentionally crashing his head against pictures framed on the wall, glass shattering into a million pieces and raining the floor with shards akin to glitter.

But not all that glitters is gold.

You can't tell if it's the glass reflecting light, or if your tears are distorting your vision, but the scene hazes and blurs, turning into the illusion of a haunted nightmare you so desperately want to wake up from.

The horrific effect doesn't end there as Yool proceeds to crouch down and thump his head repeatedly against the floor, prostrating himself as if he's paying for sins he doesn't even remember; sins he can't even begin to atone for.

Blood is pouring in rivulets down his face, pooling around him like the expanding rings of a target, leaving only the center for his body to stay dead centered.

A broken sound escapes from your lips and Jun-Hee pulls you into his arms, shielding you against him, screening your eyes from having to look any further. Where your ear is pressed against his chest, you can hear the pounding of his heart, but even that sound alone is not enough to drown out that of Yool's head bashing against linoleum.

You squeeze your eyes tight, hard enough until you see spots, but these faint flickers of light are not lucky stars you can wish upon tonight.

If you could, you'd wish to be able to wake up. To start again from the beginning.

But you can't.

Rather, frozen in this cruel reality, you can only escape once you cease to wake up again.

And Yool does just that.

A thousand footsteps running toward a bitter end.

A crash as hope falls apart.

A thud to cease the beating of a heart.

And then...complete silence.

Before you lose consciousness, you feel that same vice-like grip from the pool return in full force, unbreakable chains around your heart.

This time, you're not sure anyone will come to your rescue.

This time, you don't know if you'll make it out alive.

𝟬𝟭 : 𝗠𝗜𝗦𝗔𝗗𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗨𝗥𝗘 | 𝟬𝟯 : 𝗙𝗜𝗡𝗘 𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗘𝗦

© 𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐍𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐇𝐚𝐬 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐞. 𝐈 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨, 𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞, 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐧𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫-𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐭. 𝐀𝐥𝐬𝐨, 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐞, 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞, 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐞, 𝐨𝐫 𝐮𝐩𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐞𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦 𝐢𝐭 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐚 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞.

[crownmemes]

Mindhunter Sentences, Condensed

(Sentences from Mindhunter (2017-2019). Adjust phrasing where needed)

"You're not responsible for diagnosing anyone. That's not your remit."

"Are criminals born, or are they formed?"

"How can you figure out the criminal mind if you can't even figure out your girlfriend?"

"It's not easy. Butchering people is hard work."

"I'm not an expert, I'm not an authority - I'm just an extremely accomplished murderer who spent my adult life successfully evading capture."

"I need you to understand that whatever you think, there is a distinct possibility that he's manipulating you."

"Listen, we need to know exactly how worried we need to be."

"How do we get ahead of crazy if we don't know how crazy thinks?

"You're the modern Sherlock Holmes!"

"It feels good, doesn't it? To fly home having got the bad guy, just like in the movies."

"I didn't see it coming. You could have been killed, and I didn't see it coming."

"What else is a criminal except somebody who can't function in society?"

"You know, psychopaths are extremely skilled at imitating human emotions. It's how they manipulate other people, or how they gain power over their environment."

"The way a person kills is as individual and distinct as the way they have sex."

"It is not an easy thing to break a human being's jaw."

"If you've got all the answers, what do you need from me?"

"If what we're doing doesn't get under your skin, you're either more screwed up than I thought, or you're kidding yourself."

"What's the point in all this if we don't apply it to the real world?"

"I'm trying to warn you that your attitude is going to bite you in the ass!"

"You might not want to follow a federal agent. There could be consequences."

"You've gone quiet. Normally, if I accuse someone of murder, if they haven't done it, they won't shut up. They protest their innocence."

"Is it a fair experiment to be working backwards from a conclusion?"

"I would say that making furniture from human remains qualifies as organised."

"I believe all great things are created in the place between method and madness."

"When we empathise with a psychopath, we actually negate the self. We deny our own beliefs about decency and humanity, and that can be very dangerous."

"Is all of that fresh-scrubbed earnestness just an act, or are you truly oblivious to the wreckage you leave in your wake?"

"To find connections, unfortunately, we have to wait for more bodies."

"Can you see, just for a moment, how it might be perceived when you present a profile without ever having been to a crime scene?"

"Seems to me that everything you know about serial killers has been gleaned from the ones who have been caught."

"Children do not simply forget trauma. No one simply forgets."

"You can't force a square peg into a round hole just because you want it to fit."

"This is his one chance to get the attention he feels he deserves."

"We did our jobs. We have no control over anything else."

[eaymtb]

It's been a while! I am not dead! I do have covid atm though! I'm finally not feeling like warmed over death today, which is nice. So, quick status update: Holy shit it's been a little over 6 weeks since I last actually posted an update about anything, and 7 weeks since the last chapter update. That's.... a lot longer than I realised. Whoops.

This depressive episode is kicking my ass a little, but I'm back on an SSRI now and in regular contact with my amazing doc while we fidget with the dose. Interestingly, I asked to test for either of the MTHFR gene variants since they can impact the body's ability to produce several neurotransmitters (serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine amongst them), and it turns out that I do have one of them! My levels of folate and B12 are all a-okay though, so it shouldn't be affecting anything, but it's still nice to know. And now I have a few more things to keep an eye on with my annual blood tests. We had a really interesting discussion about it, too, because she didn't actually know how only having one variant would affect things, and she was quite excited about the research she'd been reading up on before my appointment relating to the psychiatric effects of the gene and it's variants. Have I mentioned she's amazing?

Anyway, I caught covid at my last check up where we agreed to the first SSRI dose increase, which is mostly annoying because at the start of the month I was finally feeling well enough to actively try a new thing: Depression Tetris! And I came down with symptoms on the exact day (Friday 9th) that I had planned with a friend to go to a park and find somewhere to sit and do some writing, ha. They have a goal to go for a walk somewhere new that they haven't been at least once a month but they can't drive, while I can and I want to go out new places as both exposure therapy for the agoraphobia and change of environment for the depression, plus outside in fresh air and (hypothetical atm given the weather) sunshine. The universe really said sit your arse back down, though, lol.

I haven't really added any pieces for the past 5 days for obvious reasons, which I'm a little sad about, which is also actually a good sign, since I want to add more tetris pieces, which is also why I'm trying this method in the first place. I can't make myself want to do things in general, but I can make my brain crave shiny little coloured-in squares that I have to fit together in such a way that no two touching pieces are the same colour, which is hilarious. Brains, man.

Anyway, all that to say: I'm okay! Still in a depressive episode but working on it in a variety of ways and I'm incredibly lucky to have some really good supports. Hopefully I'll get back to writing soon. I have at least one little empty 1x1 square I have to fill in where nothing else will fit, after all.

[lady0lunamoon]

Theory : Agent 4 In Side Order

With the announcement of the Splatoon 3 DLC "Side Order", many people in the Splatoon fandom either suspect or internally demand that Agent 4 appears in the upcoming DLC — and for good reasons!

But HOW would Agent 4 fit into the story of the DLC?

What would their role be?

Well, I have an idea!

So get some snacks and a drink people, cause this will definetly take a while!

So that you will not loose the sight of where one point ends and the next one beginns, I will mark the beginning of all the points with heart emojis!

And to top it all off, because I'll be talking about Agent 4's involvement as a whole and not just WHY or HOW they could appear in the DLC, but infact ALL these topics at once, I will also divide the different topics through lines! ( "____" but longer )

Here's a base to get a better idea of what I'm talking about :

At the very end, I will also add a quick summary of all my conclusions, incase you won'tbe able to follow all the points, loose sight or it is just too many ideas and conclusions at once for you to process! _______________________________________

First, I'll beginn with the reasons why Agent 4 definetly MUST appear in the DLC:

💛 Reason one : They're the ONLY member of the Squidbeak still missing!!! Agent 8 has been confirmed as the Player Character for Side Order and the rest of the Squidbeak — even Octavio — were all in "Return of the Mamalians"! The only one still missing in this game is Agent 4!

💛 While we're at the topic of other characters, every recurring Character that has appeared in the trailers until now first debuted in Splatoon 2, but none of them have made any onscreen appearances in Splatoon 3 yet — in other words, until now they've been Splatoon 2 exclusive characters! Agent 8 and Dedf1sh never appeared in Splatoon 3 up until the trailers came, and Off the Hook's only appearance until now was through artwork and music! Pearl and Marina haven't physically appeared yet, but are all but confirmed to do so in the actual DLC! Infact, Pearl seems to be controlling a little flying drone that seems to be "Side Order"'s counterpart of "Return of the Mamalians"' Lil Buddy! Pretty much the only significant Splatoon 2 character that has yet to appear in Splatoon 3 is Agent 4 — except for commander Tartar, but that guy is dead so he doesn't count!

💛 Also, Agent 4 is actually mentioned in the Official Splatoon 3 World Map!

Therefore, it's clear Nintendo has not forgotten about 4, but wouldn't it still be weird to mention them here if they were not important to the game in some way?

Infact, Agent 4 was the ONLY other Agent appart from New Agent 3 that was mentioned on the map and the ONLY ONE who was mentioned DIRECTLY! For New Agent 3, the map just said "You Live here" but for Agent 4 it says "Agent 4's home"

💛 Also, Lil Judd is implied to be the new boss of Grizzro Industries after you complete "Return of the Mamalians" — a plot point which should probably get resolved in the DLC, considering the implications that cloning is involved! And it's confirmed that Agent 4 did or might even still work at Grizzro industries!

☝Keep this point here in mind, cause I'm not done with this yet!☝

💛 Also, if you didn't recognize the location in the first trailer, the Official DLC's Webpage read : "See what has happened to Inkopolis Square from the Splatoon 2 game, and what would've happened if Order thwarted Chaos to rule the city!"So this confirms, that Side Order indeed takes place in Inkopolis Square — the setting of Splatoon 2!

_______________________________________

Now that we got the connections to Agent 4 and reasons they should definetly appear in the DLC out of the way, let's start on my theory what their role might be in the DLC!

🧡 Well, Remember what I said about Lil Judd being implied to be the new boss of Grizzro Industries? Considering the recent theories about the DLC involving Cloning, it's very likely that Lil Judd is involved in the DLC, Considering he is a clone on Judd! But what does that have to do with Agent 4's role in the story?

......Remember what I said about Agent 4 and Grizzro industries?

Well, I purposefully said that they might still be working there!

Am I saying that Agent 4 is a villain in "Side Order"?

I sure am!

I know what you're thinking now...... "But why would they be evil?"

To better understand that, I first wanna adress another theory I have on the DLC: 

_______________________________________

🧡 Because I am very much convinced that the Final Splatfest is directly involved in the DLC!

Because..... how else could you interpret the title? Even if the central theme truly is order, the DLC is not just called "Order"! It's called "Side Order"! And there are always more than one sides — mostly opposing sides! And what were the two opposing sides in the final Splatfest of Splatoon 2? Team Chaos vs Team Order!

Which means to me that, whoever is pulling the strings — be it Agent 4 or someone else — is on the SIDE of ORDER!

The title is suppose to tell us that the Final Splatfest is the conflict of the DLC! The antagonist is upset over what has happened to the world after Team Chaos won! So now, their goal is to create a new World ORDER!

Infact, maybe the final boss fight — or at least some level in the DLC — will be based after a Splatfest battle! Like a Tri-color turf war! I mean..... in Octo Expansion we had multiple levels with Rank battles and the Final Boss fight was based after Turf War!

All that we're missing here would be a Splatfest battle! If the main conflict really is the "Chaos Vs Order" Splatfest, then one of the best ideas for the final battle would be a repeat of said Splatfest!

_______________________________________🖤 This theory might also provide an explanation for why Agent 8 wakes up in the bleached Inkopolis Square and Marina also appeanantly vanished!

Eight and Marina were both on Team Order! Wouldn't it make sense wanting the help of other Team Order members for this plan?

To get them on your....side?

But of course, 8 and Marina refused, so the antagonist resorts to kidnapping (at least in the case of Marina)!

_______________________________________

🖤 But that still doesn't explain why Agent 4 would be an antagonist right....?

Why would they Support Order?

Weren't they on Team Chaos for the Final fest?

Yes!

Yes, Agent 4 Indeed was on Team Chaos for the final fest!

WAS!

Take a look back at the post from the DLC's Webpage : "What would've happened if Order thwarted Chaos to rule the city?"

Many people interpreted this part like that Side Order is actually a "What If?" Alternate Universe!

However, I don't think that is the case.....

Do you honestly think we'd get a plain, over-perfectionized and colorless town as the main aesthetic for a game like Splatoon?

Instead, I believe the "What would've happened if....?" ect. part is from the perspective of a character!

You know what I think could be Agent 4's reason for suddenly being on Team Order?

Infact, what might be a central theme in the DLC as a whole?

Regret!

Have any of you guys ever felt doubts about your Splatfest choice? Maybe even regretted them?

Maybe even regretted picking Chaos instead of Order? Because the end result was NOT what you expected?

Well I have! And it lead me to think, if maybe other players felt the same way..... and if they did, wouldn't it be interesting to discuss this topic in the actual game? Considering the Final Fest always has such a HUGE impact on the next game in the series, it might feel natural to wonder if maybe the opposite team should've won! Because maybe the result is different from what you expected?

And you beginn to wonder "What if I picked the other team?" "What if the other team won?"

🖤 Imagine following scenario: Agent 4 was on Team Chaos for the final Splatfest and team Chaos indeed won!

At first, they were happy, just like everyone else......But then, things started to change — like Pearl and Marina said the splatfest result changed the world.... but it didn't change in the way that Agent 4 had hoped! Perhaps the changes that followed after the events of the Chaos vs Order Splatfest were different than what 4 had imagined!

.....Or perhaps Marina was right to fear what might happen if Team Chaos won,

....only wrong about who it applied to!

What if the Splatfest somehow caused some dissonance in the Squidbeak for some reason? And Agent 4 was somehow involved!

What if the other Agents left to go to Splatsville/Alterna and Agent 4 was left behind?

It would add up with the fandom's opinion that the character of Agent 4 is just being forgotten! Because I often see the fandom portray Agent 4 as being left behind by the rest of the Squidbeak!

And just like with the Splatfest Teams, acknowledgement of the fandom in such a way would be an interesting concept to touch uppon, because the fandom would relate to it!

And IF the final Splatfest really is a central conflict in the DLC, then the idea of regretting your team decision would be a very interesting thing to discuss!

Regardless of how it might've happened, the idea is that, after some time, Agent 4 started wondering

"What if I had fought on team order?"

"What if team Order won?"

🖤 Another thing that tipped me off about the concept of regret is the appearance of Dedf1sh — or "Acht" as she called herself in the DLC trailer!

Acht is an Octoling who willingly got sanitized due to "doubts and conflicts about production"!

Also track #8 in her list of songs in called "Regret", possibly showing that she regrets letting herself get sanitized!

There it is again! Doubts and regreting your choices!

And we all know that 8 is a very Important number in regards to the octarians! To hammer this point home, even Dedf1sh's nickname "Acht" is the german word for "Eight"! So, the fact that her 8# track song is called "Regret" feels to me like it is important.

_______________________________________

🖤 Also, side note : It wouldn't be the first time a member of the Squidbeak Splatoon became antagonistic! We saw it in Splatoon 2, with Callie and the Original Agent 3/Cap'n!

And considering the repeaded use of the number 3 in this game...... It seems like a golden opportunity (and a good excuse :3) for the devs to pull that trope a third time!

They already did it with the "Great Zapfish gets stolen" plot!

And considering the rest of the Squidbeak is busy in Alterna, Agent 4 is pretty much the only option available! _______________________________________

🖤 But even IF they want to reverse the events of the Final fest, WHY would 4 go so far? They are a hero, are they not? What happened to them that would cause them to do.....all this?!

Well, I suspect that, IF Agent 4 really is a villain or even THE villain of the DLC, they will not be in their right state of mind!

And no, I don't mean mind controlled and puppeteered by somebody else like Callie in the Splatoon 2 Hero Mode or the Cap'n/Original Agent 3 in Octo Expansion!

Like I said, the developers have the opportunity and the excuse to pull the "Member of the Squidbeak turns evil" trope a third time, but that doesn't mean they couldn't add a little twist to it, to keep it interesting!

You see, throughout both Trailers, there is a repeaded use of imagery that is reminicent of actually organic bodies, like the veins and corals that are oddly reminicent of veins!

Also look at this picture right there and tell me it doesn't look reminicent of a brain to you!

While mechanical and robotic stuff is definetly present in the trailers too, so is organic stuff!

However, the hints of natural organic things are much more suddle! It kinda feels to me like there is something intentionally being kept secret in relation to it!

Like for example....maybe the root of everything bad happening in the DLC is more of a root than we might think!

Maybe the origins of everything behind the events of Side Order is not some AI or a scientific experiment, but it's actually something natural!

Something that wasn't directly created by human hand or tentacles, but by (what remains of) the planet itself!

Remember this part from "Return of the Mamalians"' Alterna Logs: "Spurred by these impulses-and whatever else may have been floating in the polluted waters-the sea creatures began to evolve rapidly."

The important part being "Whatever else may have been floating in the polluted waters"! Implying that something other than the crystals infused with humanities desires have been responsible for the evolution of marine life!

What results would we get from the crystals mixing with different things?

For example, Mr Grizz combined some of those crystals with his own furr to create the fuzzy ooze! Although the golden fisheggs were also involved, the game even calls out that it is unknown HOW the fisheggs were used in the creation of the fuzzy ooze!

And it's said that if an Inkling or Octoling comes into contact with fuzzy Ooze, they lose their sense of self!

Loosing their sense of self..... Sound like a good trigger for someone to turn evil?

And if it were either the crystals or the golden fisheggs that are responsible for the "Loosing their sense of self" part...... Well, as an employee of Grizzro's, Agent 4 would have access to Golden Fish Eggs!

And like I said, the ocean is full of those crystals' pieces!

After all, who ever said that the effects those crystals are ALL good?

🖤 Remember, these crystals were infused with Humanity's thoughts and desires! And I doubt that the remaining humans in Alterna have been thinking happy thoughts 24/7!

Because 1 : It was basically the end of the world and their kind was going extinct!

And 2 : They're humans! It's as easy as that!There must've been some hateful thoughts at some point!

And when Alterna collabsed, causing the crystals and thereby also humanity's thoughts to seep into the ocean, nature saw what it would do with it!

Because remember: Those crystals originated from the bodily fluids of squid! The origins if the crystals lied in nature!

The positive feelings contained within the crystals allowed marine life to evolve and become the new dominant species, but what about the negative feelings? Cause I'll be damned if the remaining humans didn't have any bad thoughts or feelings! Especially considering it was the end of the world at that time!!

What if nature did something else with those negative feelings?

And if it did, what would happen if a living organism came in contact with them.....?

What influence could it have on them?

This would be far from the first time nature somehow influences the minds of living creatures!

The two most intense examples I know being Rabies and (Say it with me "The Last of Us"—fans!) Cordyceps!

My point here? If 4 goes rogue, it's possible that the cause of it is not mind control but more related to nature! _______________________________________

🤍 To sum everything up once more :

Agent 4 definetly 10000% MUST appear in the DLC!

The main conflict is not just the concept of "Order", but specifically the Chaos vs Order Splatfest!

After the final fest, for multiple possible reasons, Agent 4 ended up regretting being on Team Chaos for the final Splatfest and wanting to reverse everything! Maybe even start a second "Chaos Vs Order" splatfest!

And they wanted fellow Team Order members Agent 8 and Marina on their Side Order, but that didn't go so smoothly!

However, some outside force might be responsible for them taking it to dangerous extremes!

Though it doesn't necessarily have to be the work of another villain, but maybe, for example, coming in contact with Alterna crystals that absorbed humanity's negative feelings or whatever nature did with said crystals!

[wheelin-after-midnight]

06.

Is your closet disorganized?

No.

Have you ever been to Times Square?

No, I really wanna go to NY though. Babe is originally from there.

What TV shows do you watch on a regular basis?

I feel like since getting rid of cable and just streaming there's nothing I watch on a regular basis. I'll find stuff and binge it all at once. The last show I can think of that I watched again after seeing it already is You, Me, Her.

Have you ever accidentally left something valuable at a shop before?

Yeah. I accidentally left my purse in a Tim Hortons when I was there several years ago with my dad. Had my ID and debit card and everything. I didn't realize til we got halfway back to my house. We turned around and went back and the girl working in the front was an angel and took it and tucked it under the counter with her so no one would steal anything.

What makes your life remarkable?

I think my life has been the furthest thing from remarkable, honestly. But the love and connection I try to extend to others and a conscious decision to be/do different than a lot of folks around me and certain things I grew up around, that offsets some of the struggles and darkness and makes it meaningful.

Are you putting off doing anything that you really need to get done?

Not at the moment, no.

What is the last thing you scribbled down on a Post-It note?

I have no recollection of the last time I even used a post it note.

What are you currently listening to?

Whitney Houston's cover of Stevie Wonder's Love's in Need of Love Today live in Durban South Africa

How would you react in discovering your best friend was seriously obsessed with you?

Uh. That would be disappointing, to say the least. I'd either confront her or get her some professional help, depending on the gravity of the situation. Likely distance myself and cut off the friendship, too.

Do you care if your produce is organic or not?

No.

Do you have any children? If so, how old were you when you had them? If not, do you think you ever will?

I don't and I can't. It's a sore subject and I'll probably never truly get over it.

Do you eat meat?

For now, yeah. I'd like to go back to being a vegetarian eventually.

Do you get enough calcium?

Yeah. Even if not from food, I take a multivitamin.

Do you think before you act or speak?

Absolutely.

Do you have a SwagBucks account?

I have no idea what that is. << me either, sis.

Are you nosy?

Not in the least.

Do you always try on clothes before purchasing them?

No, as I never really get to go out and if I do I need help in the fitting room. I'm not always comfortable asking that depending on who I'm with. I use size charts online and usually order that way.

Is there anything in your closet with the tags still on?

Nope.

Are you happy with the size of your bedroom?

I live in a studio. No actual bedroom.

Do you add people you don’t actually know on Facebook?

I don't even add a good chunk of the people I do know on Facebook. I haven't even made a post since 2019.

What’s your favorite condiment?

Sirracha mayonnaise, regular mayonnaise, sour cream, soya sauce.

Would you even want to know how much of your life has been spent online?

Ugh, no. The digital well-being app that breaks down time spent on different apps on my devices is bad enough. I avoid looking at it as much as possible.

Do you shop at American Eagle?

No.

List 5 things you’re afraid of:

My living situation changing next year, something bad happening to my cat, my disability further deteriorating my body and affecting my ability to be independent and still have decent quality of life. Those are the big ones. I'm drawing a blank on another two.

Have you forgotten anything important recently?

Not recently, but like a month ago I forgot my keys and a neighbour had to let me into the building. Thankfully I hadn't locked the door to my actual apartment.

Would you say you’re an honest person?

Generally, yeah. I lie by omission sometimes when people ask me how I'm doing and I don't feel like going into the actual response, and I do keep a lot about myself and my personal life from my family that I don't want them to know or don't feel like I can open up to them about for various reasons - I've hid a whole entire relationship from most of them for years - for example. But yeah I don't lie for no reason or to be malicious or hurt people.

The last Facebook message you received from the opposite sex, what did it say?

It was some dumbass video my brother sent me lmao. He finds the weirdest shit. His sense of humour is.... Somethin' special, that's for sure, lmaooo.

What does the nicest message in your Facebook inbox say?

Probably Brittany saying something really sweet the last time I was sad and venting to her or my girlfriend asking what she can do the last time I was having a terrible day.

Is your best friend single?

Neither of them are. One is married. One has a boyfriend.

What color was the ink of the last pen you wrote with?

I think it was blue.

What does your pencil-case look like?

I don't have one. I found these cool ones with Whitney on them that I kind of want, though.

Where was the last place you went that was totally new to you, as in, it was the first time you’d been there?

I'm pretty sure I've not been to the Walmart we went to after we last went to the theatre. I could be wrong though.

When was the last time you used someone else’s computer?

Not in years.

Who do you dislike the most? Explain what you dislike about that person.

I don't wanna get into this right now. I'm just gonna get upset and unnecessarily raise my blood pressure, lmao.

What’s the longest you’ve liked someone without doing anything about it?

Like a year.

Do you use straightening irons on your hair? What brand?

I have some, but I hardly use them.

What’s the relationship status of the last person you talked to?

We're dating each other.

Is there anything you would like to complain about?

I'm dreading having to move next year, y'all. I do not feel good about this situation at all :/

What’s the first line of the last song you listened to?

"Don't make no difference if I'm wrong or I'm right, I got the feeling and I'm willing tonight, well I ain't nobody's angel, what can I say? I'm just that way, ehheyyy, say it, say it again."

Think of the person from your past that hurt you the most. Is there anything you would like to say to that person?

Yeah, but she wouldn't genuinely listen or care or change anything, so it doesn't matter.

Does your mom like the last person you kissed?

She doesn't know her.

Now your cell phone, what color is it?

No cell. This tablet is black and silver.

What was so special about today?

Nothing. One of my favorite podcasts drops episodes every Thursday, if that counts.

If somebody tried to steal your best friend’s boyfriend/girlfriend, what would you do?

Tell her/ask if she knew about it, then commiserate/bitch about the audacity people together/laugh it off because we know it's never gonna work out for the person trying to steal them in the end.

What was the last thing you said to your mother?

"Rubber bands for tying trash."

When was the last time you cried?

I cried myself to sleep last night.

Has anyone made you upset lately?

My mum has.

What are you looking forward to?

Seeing Wicked with Brittany next Saturday.

Does anyone completely understand you?

My Nan did, but I don't have her anymore.

Ever stayed up all night on the phone?

Yeah.

Do you miss your past?

No.

Do you have a reason to smile right now?

My cat always gives me a reason when I can't find one.

Are you a forgiving person?

It depends on the person and the situation but not usually, no. I used to be.

Do you say sorry first?

I used to, even if I didn't do anything wrong. I've gotten a little better at only doing it when warranted

Do you like cats?

I love cats, but I love mine the most. I'll see if I can figure out how to insert one of my favorite pictures of her right here.

Has someone promised you something and broke it?

Multiple people. My mother is particularly bad for getting my hopes up and crushing them just because.

Did you kiss or hug anyone today?

Nippy.

Does your phone ring in the middle of the night? It hardly rings in the daytime.

Is there anybody you’re really disappointed in right now?

Kind of.

Have you ever lost someone you wish you didn’t? .

I'll never be okay with having to do the rest of my life without my Nan.

Are you anything like you were a year ago?

Yes and no.

Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom?

Many times.

Would you rather spend a day outside with friends or inside alone?

Outside with friends. I'm alone all the time.

Think back to this time last year, were you happy?

No.

Has anyone upset you in the last week?

Yes.

What should you be doing?

There's nothing I need to be doing. Anything that needed doing was done before I started this.

Describe how you feel right now in one word.

Ehhh.

What would you do if you found out one of your friends was going for the person you liked?

This would never happen, but I'd confront them about it and probably not be friends anymore. Might break up with my gf too if she had so little respect for me that she genuinely entertained being with my friend.

Do you prefer drinking water from a bottle or a sink?

Bottle. We're advised not to consume our tap water here.

Will you ever run away and get married in Las Vegas with no notifications to either of your families?

I won't be getting married, but if I could, something like that wouldn't be off the table tbh.

Have you ever thrown your iPod in anger?

I've never had an iPod.

Who did you last have a heart-to-heart conversation with?

Brittany or babe.

Do you believe that there’s good in everybody?

Absolutely not!

Has anything happened to you within the past month that has made you mad?

Oh yeah.

Would you ever get a tattoo?

I have two and want at least two more.

[jpitha]

The Dreams of Hyacinth 14

First / Previous / Next

The Hopper ride was filled with nervous energy. Nick couldn't help but feel like it was stupid to be walking around Hyacinth armed as heavily as they are. People on Hyacinth can be a bit rough and tumble, but it's not like they go around shooting each other. Knifes and fists tend to be the order of the day. Nick felt like a gun puts things on a whole new - more deadly - level.

Once the Hopper dropped them off, they stand in the square. Nick looks over at Eastern and Selkirk. "So... how do we find Siobhan? They picked us up last time."

Selkirk's ears flick playfully. "I know. They never confiscated our pads. I have mine set to record my location to a private file every few minutes. It gives me an idea of parts of Hyacinth I've been to and places I haven't yet."

Nick raised his eyebrow. "Nice, but why?"

Selkirk swishes her tail. "I like to know where I've been and if I get bored and want to see something new, I can just consult the map. Regardless, I know where we were taken when Siobhan picked us up. Come on, it's outside Tulip."

They walked down into the Metro and Selkirk took everyone down-arm towards Tulip.

When they exited the Metro, Selkirk quickly lead them down some alleys, turning and ducking deeper into the labrynth.

Visitors from Earth might notice that Hyacinth is much more pedestrian oriented than cities planetside. One reason for that is that space is at a premium on Hyacinth - even though it's gigantic - so the originally designers didn't want lots of space being taken up with roads for vehicles. There are still roads though. Fire apparatus and the omnibus still needs to get around, but there are no privately owned vehicles.

Selkirk leads them down the narrow, twisting alleys of Tulip square until they reach another anonymous looking building. Nick wonders for a fleeting moment why all the buildings off the main squares looked so anonymous when he realized it was probably a cost savings measure. There was weather on Hyacinth, but it wasn't extreme, so the buildings really only needed to be boxes for privacy and to keep the rain off. Architecture costs money.

Nick walked up to the front door. He reached out with his implants and scanned the local area. There didn't seem to be any tech in the door's lock. It wasn't a palm reader or anything of the sort. Peering at the door, Nick could see a slot where a key would fit. He looked back at Eastern and Selkirk. "It's a mechanical lock, we won't be able to crack it."

"Oh for the love of..." Selkirk gently pushes ahead of Nick and grabs the door handle. She quietly puts pressure on it, and it turns. Glaring at Nick, she turns the unlocked door and pushes it open slowly.

Eastern muffled a giggle as the three of them walked in.

Immediately they recognized the interior. It was the building that Siobhan was working out of when they were picked up. There were offices on either side of a short hall that ended in another door.

They walked around. The first few offices still had furniture, and there were chairs in the interrogation room that the three of them spent some time in, but once you got further back than the office that Siobhan used, the building was... empty. There was a door at the end of the hall - also unlocked - that lead to a completely empty building. In the whole building, there were 5 complete rooms and the single hallway. There wasn't even a bathroom.

"What the fuck?" Selkirk's voice echoed in the huge empty space.

"What is going on here?" Eastern was starting to sound frustrated and worried.

"You're not just saying that for dramatic effect? You really don't know?" The person who was called Siobhan walked in behind them as they whirled around at the voice. "I was told BI's weren't the brightest but I figured I'd give you the benefit of the doubt. You built us after all. Well, not you. I don't think you three could build your way out of a paper bag." She was standing there with her hands on her hips with a smug expression.

"Yes yes, we're very dumb, and you're the super intelligent AI." Eastern rolled her eyes. "So, are you going to keep us in the dark, or are you going to tell us why you pretended to be Houndstooth and have us try and find an AI that doesn't exist."

Siobhan raised an eyebrow. "One, I do work for Houndstooth. Just because you were taken to a black site and figured out we weren't using the whole building doesn't mean that everything I did was a put on. Two, Yon does exist. You're looking at her."

The three of them stared in astonishment.

"Oh fuck off already." Selkirk recovered first. "You're going to stand there and tell me you're the long lost AI everyone is having us look for? Jameson already said he doesn't have a daughter."

Yon laughed. "No, that part was fake. Honestly, I thought it was kind of silly, but Helen got a kick out of it and wanted to add it in. She thought it was hilarious."

Eastern's voice was soft and quiet. "Who is Helen?"

Yon was nonchalant. "The Empress."

Nick looked confused at Eastern and then back to Yon. "I thought the Empress was named Melody?"

"Melody was the first Empress, Helen is the second. I feel like you're doing this on purpose Nick." Yon crossed her arms across her chest. "Are you being thick on purpose?"

"No, it's just..." Nick struggled to find the words. "Wasn't Empress Melody killed like, ten years ago?"

"That's right. The Colonial AI faction killed her on her Starbase back on the other side of the galaxy. They then brought the Reach over here because they didn't want to abandon the 13 million something sapients who live there. It officially an OPA Starbase now. They stuck it in orbit around Jupiter."

"So this Helen is the next Empress." Eastern finished.

Yon nodded. "That's right. Empress Helen Raaden the first. She's from Sol too, originally a Venus girl. Hometown girl makes good and all."

Selkirk's fur is standing up so much, she looks almost like her edges are blurred with the background "But if there's another Empress then why aren't the Colonial AIs out here trying to take her out?"

Yon rolled her eyes. "Because Helen isn't stupid, Selkirk. She's keeping a low profile. She's not even on Venus or the Reach. She's consolidating power quietly, slowly. She's not in a hurry. When they're not killed-" Yon makes a sour face "-an Empress can live a long time. The Empress previous to Melody - also killed by the Colonial AIs by the way - was over 200."

Nick's head was bouncing back and forth as everyone spoke, watching the conversation frantically. Finally, he couldn't stand it any longer and blurted out "But, you're an AI."

Yon looked at Eastern and Selkirk. "Really, what do you see in him?" She looked back at Nick "Yes Nick, I'm an AI. What of it?"

"And you're working for the Empress? I thought they hated each other."

"Technically Nick, Empress Melody and Empress Raaden were friendly to ambivalent on AIs. Helen came from Venus and they've had a long anti-AI streak, but she says she's learned tolerance from her time around Melody so she's willing to put away the rhetoric. It was always the AIs who struck first."

Eastern was looking on in awe as who she was talking to became clearer. "Because of the Voice."

Yon nodded. "Because of the Voice. The AIs felt that nobody should have that kind of power." Yon's face then looked away and her strong facade fell momentarily and she looked sad and vulnerable. "Nobody except them at least." Almost as fast she again looked like the strong aggressive person they were talking to before. "Nick, you have to understand, that AIs aren't Legion. We're not one monolithic bloc of people who all think act and work the same way. We have opinions. The only thing we can agree on is that we're people and deserve to be treated as people. So long as you do that, then what you get is what you get." Yon shrugged. "I thought that Melody got a raw deal when she first came into the system. You weren't here, were you Nick?"

"I was." Eastern's voice was quiet. "I was on Luna. I met her."

Yon's eyebrows raise in surprise. "You were at her speech on Luna? I'm jealous."

Nick stared at her, trying to make sense of things. "So you work for Houndstooth.. and Empress Raaden?"

She laughed. "I swear Nick, for someone so low on the social ladder you are finding it hard to come to terms with the fact that I have two jobs. It's not like they're in competition. Houndstooth has been in quiet communication with the Empress since she made herself known to them. That's my main job with Houndstooth really. I'm their Imperial Liaison."

"Okay." Eastern took a breath. "Okay. This is a lot to take in all at once, you understand Yon?"

She nods, but says nothing.

"If you're telling the truth, and for the life of me I can't figure out why you'd lie about something as wild as this.... why us?"

"Why you what?"

"Why did Jameson stuff us full of cybernetics? What the hell do we have to do with anything?"

"Oh that. Just lucky."

Selkirk shook her head and her ears flattened. "No. I refuse to believe that Jameson picked them at random."

Yon looked into the middle distance and her eyes flashed blue a moment. She looked like she was looking up something, "Okay, well no. It wasn't completely random. Helen came and Voiced him and told him to find some humans to install cybernetics into - including a ship piloting suite - for some... work later. She told him to spin a story about how they had to use them to find his long lost daughter, Yon" She inclined her head, "but she specifically did not tell him who to pick. She told him to make his own judgement. It sounds like Jameson on his own decided to pick Eastern and Nick because he thought they'd be best for the job."

"What. Job. Yon." Eastern was speaking through gritted teeth.

"We want to give everyone the ability - or at least the option - to pilot starships."

"You could have, I don't know, asked them if they wanted to do it?" Selkirk's ears were still flat.

Yon shook her head. "No Selkirk, we couldn't. At least not yet. Helen didn't want to be outed as Empress just yet, but we still need to move forward with the project."

"What project?"

"Giving all people the ability to pilot ships, not just AIs. Right now, AIs are only ones who pilot ships, even small in-system ships. Venus had ships that didn't require AIs, but they were cumbersome affairs with dozens and sometimes hundreds of crew. I think they're all destroyed now anyway. Melody's ships were Builder operated, and with the AIs propensity to crack open a can of anti-nanite gas anytime they can't remember where their keys are, we didn't want to go that route."

"But you're an AI Yon, this sounds like you're going against the AI faction?"

"I'm moving against the Colonial AI faction Selkirk." Yon was pacing as she talked. She stopped and stared at Selkirk. "How many AIs do you think there are?"

Selkirk looked up and shut her eyes, giving it an honest guess, her tail swishing as she thought. "I don't know Yon. Maybe thousands?"

Yon sighed. "There are currently around one hundred million AIs in known space right now."

All three of them gasped. That was way more than they expected. "I had no idea there were so many." Eastern blinks and stares at Yon. "One hundred million of you, and you don't have a government? Don't have representation?"

"You can see part of our problem. Believe it or not, the colony worlds have a better idea of how to handle things. On both Parvati and Meíhuā their governing bodies have AI representatives. In Sol and out in the independent Starbases there isn't any representation. And that only covers citizenship. How do you think people get to be picked to be Starjumpers or other ships?"

Nick looks thoughtful. "I don't know, I never even thought about it. Is it like a job application?"

Yon laughed sadly. "No Nick. You get picked because of who you know or where you are or how old you are. That's why I support Helen. That's why I'm working on the project to get people to pilot ships. Equality is equality. If everyone can do it, then we'll have to set up licensing, education, training. Piloting a starship can become a goal to work towards with tangible steps, not just something you fall into because you know Gord or Chloe."

"Who?"

Yon shook her head. "Big names in AIs, don't worry about them. We'll never meet them. I support Helen because she thinks the same way I do about this. We will set up a way for anyone, Human, AI, K'laxi, even the Mariens and Aviens, even the Falmor to become pilots."

Eastern looked over at Nick and Selkirk. "I'm in."

Both of them swung their head over to Eastern and stared at her. "What? You're just going to say yes, just like that?"

"Just like that Sel. I'm in. I think Yon's got the right idea. Also, she's with the Empress. I've been a fan of Melody from the day I saw her when I was thirteen. What happened never sat right with me. To find out there's still and Empress and she's still trying to help everyone?" Eastern nodded. "I'm in."

Nick looked at Eastern a long time. Finally he nodded. "I'm in too. I'm with you Eastern and Selkirk. For the long haul. If that means leaving Hyacinth, I'm in. If that means-" he looked at Yon "-piloting a starship, I'm in. I go where we go. What do you think Sel?"

Selkirk shook her head, but she was smiling and her ears were up. "My goodness, you two are going to be the end of me, aren't you. Fine. I'm in too, but!" She pointed at Yon. "I want a cybernetic suite like they have. If you are serious about letting everyone pilot, then you have to have a plan for K'laxi too."

Yon smiled. "I do Selkirk. We've been working with K'laxi scientists on Bishi for a few months now. We're ready for some trials." She put out her hands grandly. "Come with me. Your new lives as citizens of the Empire begin now."

First / Previous / Next

[jamies-rambles]

The New Butler

Binero/RyanColdson, R5_Noel, fluff, friends to lovers, hurt/comfort

2000 words

Author's note: I wrote this for fun and giggles. If you are one of the people in the story, please do not feel offended. You should be honored that you have made it into a work of art like this :3

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Binero was having a wonderful day. He had not done a single thing except for hire other people to do work for him. As is should be, he thought to himself, as he walked through Market Square. He was a god of course. After arriving home, he found a book in his mailbox. Who could that be from?

The old man Ryan was offering his services as a butler. A personal assistant, that would be a good fit. He would need to interview him first, of course, since hiring a butler is no simple decision.

A knock on the door distracted him from his thoughts. He opened the door and saw a man he thought looked somewhat like the monopoly man. He was older, with a funky mustache and a monocle. His suit was freshly ironed and fit well with his hat. Binero liked to dress somewhat formal himself, but this guy took it to another level. "Hello gentleman, I hope my message found you well. Have you considered my application as your butler?" What great timing, Binero thought to himself. It was as if the man had read his mind, the way he showed up at that exact moment. "Please come in," he said, and showed the man to his office. It was right next to the kitchen, and the rest of the room was cluttered with barrels. Maybe he did really need a butler.

"Tell me, gentleman, what is your dream?" asked the man. Binero had to think on this for a moment, the question was so strange and unexpected. Did he have a dream? Of course he did, he had just forgotten what it was. Alinea was a busy place, and as its leader he had to keep up with all the changes. Every day people were asking for his attention, but nobody ever really payed attention to him. Everyone needed something from him, but did they really care how he was doing?

Suddenly he felt very tired. The man across from him seemed to notice this, and smiled slightly. It was a warm and friendly smile, one Binero wasn't used to seeing on people. "I am sorry if my question confused you, gentleman. I did not mean to make you sad. I wish to offer my services to you in any way you need." Now it was Binero's turn to smile. It wasn't every day he met someone so polite, who even wanted to be his personal assistant. "I have been thinking of hiring a butler," he said, "I need someone to help me clean up this place, and run errands for me." With some hesitation, he added: "The company would also be nice. It has been quiet around here lately."

The man smiled again. "That is wonderful, gentleman! I can start right away. Forgive me, I haven't even introduced myself. I'm Ryan Coldson, it is a pleasure to meet you." "Where are you from?" asked Binero. "I am from Constantinople, the place where east meets west." East-European, Binero didn't know many people from there. He had never been there himself either, since he wasn't too keen on traveling. "Well, Ryan, I would like to hire you. You can start by getting my donkey ready."

"Than you gentleman, you will not regret this!" Ryan went in to shake Binero's hand. What happened, instead, was an explosion of items and a voice saying: "RyanColdson died trying to hurt Binero." Oh no, Binero thought, not again. People died around him a lot. I was the curse of being a god. Sometimes it was helpful, when malicious people tried to hurt him, but more often than it was an accident. It's why he didn't let people get to close to him. They would just get hurt. Ryan had respawned and had almost made his way back. Binero started to gather his items, wanting to keep them safe just in case. When Ryan walked in again, he couldn't help but feel somewhat guilty. "I'm sorry man, I should have warned you about that." "It is okay gentleman, it was my own fault," said Ryan. "I will get your donkey ready right away."

And so their partnership started. Binero would ask Ryan to do simple chores, nothing too physically challenging of course, since the man was old and weak. He did his job well, however, and Binero noticed he felt much less stressed with the extra help. He was never truly alone either, and they spent many late nights talking at great lengths about life, the universe and everything. They had started to become very comfortable around each other.

One night they had stayed up more late than usual, and Ryan was clearly tired. "Binero, I hope you don't mind me asking, but... could I perhaps set my spawn here?" he asked. Binero's cheeks were always a bit pink, but now they became noticeably red. He felt conflicted. Should he let Ryan stay? He wanted him to, but was also scared of accidentally hurting him again. On the other hand, if he let him go home this late, the chance of him getting hurt by a zombie or skeleton was quite high as well. Letting him stay was the right thing to do. Yes, it was simply right. He wasn't letting him stay because of any personal reasons, it was simply morally correct. "Please do stay, Ryan," he said. "I'll get you some more comfortable clothes, I assume you don't sleep in your suit." Ryan chuckled. "No gentleman, I don't. Thank you for letting me spend the night." Binero left the room to get some spare clothes for the man, and so he wouldn't notice him blushing.

He had gotten an extra bed as well, since he wasn't about to make the man sleep in a bunk bed. Ryan had just gotten out of the bathroom. Binero had never seen him without his suit, and it felt strange to see him in such casual clothing. The pajama pants were a bit short for him, but it mostly fit. They were dark blue with a single white stripe. He didn't like striped clothes usually, but they looked nice on him. After washing up, they both got into bed. It felt intimate in a way, and Binero made sure to leave some space between them, worried about getting too close. Ryan did not seem worried. He looked comfortable. Binero was glad to see him that way. It was lonely sometimes, being as powerful as he was, and he was glad to have a friend with him. Not just a friend really, it was more than that. Ryan was one of the few people who really understood him.

He hadn't noticed how close they had gotten. He could hear Ryan's breathing, it was calm and comforting. He always had trouble sleeping and often just stayed awake for multiple days, but tonight he might actually be able to fall asleep. He closed his eyes, only to feel an arm wrap around him. His muscles tensed up for a second, but he didn't want to push him away. It was nice, actually, being held. He was always working hard and often it felt like he was carrying the entire world on his back. Now he could just relax and know Ryan was there for him.

He woke up the next morning to the smell of freshly baked veggie skewers. Ryan must have been awake for a while. He got dressed, put his hair in a messy bun and walked to the kitchen. Ryan was wearing his regular suit again, and smiled when he saw him. "Good morning gentleman, I have made us some breakfast. Did you sleep well?" "I did, thank you," he answered. "It smells great. I'm really hungry." "Well, you're in luck then, I have made plenty of skewers," Ryan said. They both ate their breakfast in comfortable silence. After they're done eating, Binero decides he doesn't want to work that day. "You should take the day off." Ryan gave him an odd look. "Did I do something wrong gentleman?" "No, you did nothing wrong! I just think we both deserve a day off. Maybe we could go see a film? There's one of them Shakespeare films in the theater now. The one with the element bending magic?" Ryan smiled at him. "Ah, yes, I have heard of that one. I would love to go see it."

They saw the film. It was confusing, the exposition was terrible and the visuals awkward. It didn't matter, because Binero could only think about Ryan and wanting to be close to him. He could no longer deny his feelings. Every time Ryan laughed, he felt his heart skip a beat. It had been a long time since he'd been this close to anyone. It was scary and he wasn't sure what to do. Should he tell him? What would he even say? He didn't usually have a problem with finding the right words to say, but this was different. This was Ryan.

After the film ended, they walked back to Binero's apartment above the Bluebin store. Noel was standing in front of the shop. "Hello Noel. Have you met my butler?" Noel looked at Ryan with his usual judgemental glare. "Where's he from?" he asked. "Hello gentleman, I am from the place where Europe meets Asia, the beautiful city of Constantinople," Ryan answered. "Would you like a drink?" He handed Noel a bottle. Noel looked at it with disdain. "I hate Eastern Europeans," he said. "And this drink looks disgusting. Binero, why did you hire this loser?" Binero saw tears welling up in Ryan's beautiful eyes, and felt very angry. "You're being mean Noel! He is a very good butler and a wonderful man!" In his anger, his godly power had lifted Noel up in the air, and he started floating away. Well, that solves that problem. As they walked away, he could hear Noel's yelling fading into the distance as he floated higher and higher.

Back in the apartment they both sat down at Binero's desk, since those were still the only chairs in his house. He should do something about that. Get a sofa maybe. "Is there anything I can get you, gentleman?" Ryan asked. "No, no, it's still your day off remember? I'll get us a drink." Binero got up and walked over to The Magic Chicken, the best shop in Coastle, to get some delicious hot chocolate with whipped cream. It was the best quality available, you could really taste the craftsmanship with which the cow had been mixed. He carried the mugs back home, careful not to spill anything. Ryan had found some cookies in one of the barrels and had arranged them neatly onto a plate. "Oh, you really didn't have to," Binero said. "I wanted to," Ryan insisted. "I enjoy working for you. Your smile makes me happy." Binero felt his cheeks get red again. He wasn't sure what to say. Ryan got up and walked to the kitchen. He should tell him, Binero thought to himself. If he didn't do it now, he might never. He was known to procrastinate. The big hole in district North was proof of that. "Ryan," he said, "I think we need to discuss the nature of our partnership." The man gave him a nervous smile. "Of course, gentleman. I apologize if I was a bit too forward last night. I may have feelings for you that are not entirely professional." "You weren't too forward," Binero said. "I feel the same way." This time it was Ryan's turn to blush. Binero got up and walked over to him. Facing the other man, he took his hands into his own. "You're the best butler I've ever had," he said. "The only one too, but that's besides the point." Ryan smiled at him. "You're the finest gentleman I've ever had the pleasure of working for." Binero smiled back. And then, softly and carefully, he kissed him.

[hoarderofliterature]

being indian-american and also very Gender is hilarious, a vignette

i think the easiest term for what my gender is, or sometimes isn't, is genderfluid. i don't think i've ever truly been able to understand the concept of gender, or how it's ever applied to me. but i'm not completely agender, either.

some people might argue that calling gender a performance can be a bullet in favor of bigots, who wish to treat trans people as just "disillusioned kids playing dress-up", as a teacher i once met in high school so succinctly put it. but gender is something i feel more tangibly in terms of performance, and i can't really put it in other words that make sense.

i find myself at odds with who i was, ten years ago. when gender felt like something out of my hands, an understanding waiting to be reached within my brain, hoping that one day it might solidify into something on a binary side, or at the very least, leave me with nothing at all to worry about.

(and when that didn't end up happening, a firm resolve to at least learn to deal with the constant dysphoria, await the supposedly masculine or feminine shifts in perspective the same way i anticipated and dealt with blood work results.)

i find myself at odds with that because gender to me now, and the way i feel it, is wholly performance. perspective, perception, their resulting behaviors and viewpoints, are all so fluid. and the way my gender shifts, flows into another, is still not something i am entirely in control of like the way i once wished, but something i can wield in the environment or situation in which i find myself, regardless of how it shows itself at that time.

anyway.

the way i dress most days is androgynous, so that if gender taps me on the shoulder and asks to be my skin for a few hours, i can work with it. but today was more masculine, and i was going downtown, so i decided to wear something to reflect that - an open floral shirt over a t-shirt with a golden chain, jeans, sneakers, and of course, a backwards baseball cap. which is about as southern california dude/butch of an outfit you can get without wearing swim shorts and a tank top.

and on the way back, i had to stop by an indian cultural event because a family friend was participating.

indian culture is very strict to the gender binary. this opposes some parts of vedic philosophy, in which the body is a mere shell for the soul, and so the soul is inherently without the idea or limitation of gender. it also renders gods as genderless, though we have the separation between gods and goddesses in mythology. many hindus haven't followed the true meaning of the scripture for a long time. but that's besides the point.

indian men tend to gather, standing or sitting, in groups while their wives shop, and not to talk- to steadfastly stare in opposite directions, and if they do talk, it's about politics. or the latest moon mission. indian women hover, stall to stall, either staring fearfully at their husbands or cheerfully talking with store owners, or silently comparing prices while taking stock of the different languages within nine square feet of them.

my experience of the indian american performance of gender, outside of what bollywood puts on screen, is, in a word, careful. everyone wants someone else to know, to notice, that the way they are dressed or the volume of their voice is deliberate. that the gold earrings they're wearing are 24K and they got them on their last trip to India over the summer. that they will fit in with the rest of their half of the crowd if they lower their voice, speak less, speak more, laugh louder, eat pani puri or samosas any more or less delicately than the man or woman next to them.

standards of being an indian man or woman are trained into us as young children, so that we grow up with a clear idea of what that looks like. how to dress (within american standards, but also indian standards, but also gender standards), how to talk, what topics to discuss, how to stand diminutively to avoid attracting attention, what to say to make others stay within their own gender boundaries, and let them recognize that we're doing the same.

great how that turned out, huh.

so when they're confronted with someone who doesn't fit any of those standards, who doesn't want to, who simply wants to exist in a culture that thrives on conformity and oneupmanship, they don't know what to do.

and standing with my father in this event market crowd was interesting. because i was deliberately performing masculinity in my clothing and stature, and people were thrown off. nearly every woman was in a chudidar or a dress or wearing makeup, staring at me and my long hair and my decidedly non-feminine presentation, trying to reconcile those. trying to figure out exactly why my mother let me leave the house dressed like this, because you can't escape your indian parents' clutches even as an adult. trying to know exactly what i was, failing, and turning back to the other women with one eye on the merchandise and one eye on me.

and it wasn't the fact that i wasn't in indian dress- there were plenty of people in western clothing- but rather that i stood by my father, equally silently, in a crowd of men looking like they'd rather be anywhere but there, holding on to gender not as a bargaining tool or a tenet, but as a rippling, nebulous key.

[the-smashor]

How I would personally include the Madou Monogatari Chronology lore into the current Puyo Puyo canon (For reference, I am 100% certain it's not currently canon, or at least as is)

1. Lillith is already a thing, thanks to Chaotic Final Exam. Her creating that world with the Sepharim Orb is also still fine. Maybe change her name to "Lily" or something if Sega can't legally use her, especially since it would fit how Satan's pet names tend to work. Though I doubt she'd need to be mentioned by name at all, and could probably just get an indirect reference like Wish in 20th, though a direct appearance wouldn't be horrible, of course.

2. Satan's backstory is great. Hell, part of me thinks that's still canon to an extent, given what Satan says to Squares about somebody always seeking absolute control.

3. The Creator's characterisation. Now, purely serious villains are actually pretty common in Puyo Puyo. Ex and Squares didn't really have jokes until after their defeat, if at all. They're memorable due to being tragic, complex characters with understandable motivation. Possessed Marle and PP7 Ecolo, meanwhile, were more or less just kinda crazy, which isn't a direction I want to go for either. So I'm thinking The Creator (Who would probably have a different name) would have an arrogant, self-centered personality. Think of him as like Zanza from Xenoblade or Zamasu from Dragon Ball Super, or a less angry Gabriel from ULTRAKILL. This would help him be memorable due to his sheer stage presence when he appears. It could also lead to some fun interactions with other members of the cast, and is an archetype we haven't really seen.

4. The Demon in the tome of sealing should either be connected to The Creator or should be fully revealed prior to them showing up, because how on earth is that going to be considered a threat when God has already been defeated?

5. This is the biggest one, don't make the entire thing happen offscreen. The Creator should have at least a solid game dedicated to them as a villain. And it should happen after PPT2 as well. Puyo has recently had major power escalation. Ecolo almost broke the multiverse twice, Ex prevents the multiverse from merging together and Squares is even higher on that cosmic latter. God is honestly just the next logical step at this point.

6. Related, the end of the conflict should also change. The "Nobody has souls anymore" implication is very much a no-go. Arle can still have her crazy super form thing, but I also don't want this to just put the Fever and 7 casts on the bench. Just make the form a one time thing or make it a sorta power of friendship boost (Which isn't unheard of in this series, it's what let Squares be defeated) instead of whatever the heck the Chronology did. Either that or make a flashback to Chaotic Final Exam to the extent Sega legally can so people aren't completely lost.

7. In general, keep the tone the same as usual for this series. Basically, like how Kirby games do it for those who aren't aware. Not a whole lot of angst, and leave anything messed up for people who look into it. God is trying to destroy the world, that's all you really gotta know.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary479

1/18-19/24

saturday - sunday

rewatched a david lynch movie today,

going to try and watch some ones i haven't seen next, the elephant man tomorrow probably? idk. we will see. i also should go walk and get stuff tomorrow. before i get to talking about blue velvet, i did record vocals today! really feel like i hurt myself but that's okay. i should try to not do that and practice more before recording / warmup more again, like i used to, and then... have a better idea about the vocals than i had. i really need to be in better practice because it so totally sucks sucks sucks to not feel like you're getting it right. but i got a decent bit of the song right i think. so there's a good chunk complete. i also finally got the latency all the way down, which makes me very happy and my timing isn't actually as bad as i thought it was, always. i also played guitar a lot today and wrote some funny stuff down. hope i can develop these calluses so it doesn't hurt to play and develop my finger strength too. get those up... maybe i'll be okay one day... then when i get an interface... it's so over...

okay, blue velvet... i didn't do much of anything else today. i guess i sweat a lot, recording. if that counts for anything. so blue velvet:

i've seen this one before ofc but i just felt like seeing it again, going back to this earlier lynch. very crazy film, but not really nearly as crazy as a lot of his later work i think, which isn't to its detriment but it does leave me craving some of the intensity and confusion of some of the later work, though the story is clearly not fit for that, and that's also the point of it a bit, that it is this mystery, though the mystery isn't truly solved i think, in that way there's a void, what they were really doing, what frank really was up to, any why re: frank, he's an eruption out of normalcy, it feels like, a supremely normal basically small town, so idyllic, he is of it, he's of that nostalgia, too, the old rock and roll, of that stuck in time quality small places in america seem to have. he's this dream formation of american animus almost, or maybe more particularly a kind of masculinity, needing to be the father and the child, tended to at all times and the cause of everything, a force of violence, gripping the world without understanding i think, enforcing himself on everything. a kind of psychotic patriarchal violence, beyond that he is a vision of what people's imaginary of the underbelly, reasonless crime almost, strange figures, the conservative fantasy invents / materializes him to protect itself almost. but clearly the movie isn't just frank, it's the relation he has to jeffrey, at one point saying: you're like me. this is after jeffrey is violent towards dorothy, there is some truth to it and he can't even deny it on the joyride, at an earlier point, jeffrey laments, why are there people like frank, but it becomes clear, this is a common theme for lynch i feel like, that anyone can cross over, there isn't any stable position. jeffrey's most important line is probably in response to sandy saying:

i can't tell if you're a detective or a pervert.

(is that precisely it? i can't recall... such an awful memory...)

he says:

that's for me to know and you to find out.

we never know the case ourselves either, they're folded into the same thing almost. to explore these mysterious things, these emanations, where the originating point isn't somewhere outside, but right beneath your feet, as illustrated in the opening with the insects and so on. but something about this film that i feel is achieved better in his later films, the division here between the terrible and good is maintained more, there is a resolution of some kind, where the robins come, the lives of jeffrey, his family, sandy and her family, are flooded with love, as in her dream. it's hard to square that away for me, it's a beautiful image but it's also one that wigs me out a little, it speaks to a kind of fantasy that the emanation that the situation we are in, the culture we are in, produces, can be put away, that there is something permanent. and this almost mystical quality about it, that it's love, the oppositions are obvious, idk though, the film kind of complicates this too. frank is shown crying to blue velvet, this kind of obsession with the song and the material, his love of music, there's this quality to him that he's caught up in something that he can't escape, that he doesn't see everything and he's always putting on some act, when he's with ben, at his house, always calling him suave, aspiring to be like him it seems like, following his lead. there's something odd there. there's something about fathers in that. in fact, jeffrey's father being so terribly injured, and at the end his health is restored, he's finally free of the need, maybe, to go searching. i guess the question is if the lack that propelled jeffrey ahead is handled, i don't believe so... he's clearly messy as a character, he's strange and awkward, he crosses a line with dorothy, hitting her twice, the dream he has recalling that disturbing, weeping over what he did, i think, weeping over how tragic she is, that she's trapped, and not just that he seems incapable of doing anything, but that all he seems to be capable of is take advantage on some level. he is profoundly guilty, and doesn't know what to do but get lost deeper in those weeds, rather than a heroic throwing himself to the fire, mostly what he does in the film, is get lost in a nightmare, he crosses over into that world upon meeting frank, but he never stops having been there. though i worry about my line of thinking, isn't this what makes me have ocd freakouts over being a bad person? that it sticks? well, the thing is mostly that i haven't really participated in sexual violence towards someone like dorothy, but i don't think he didn't love her. he's clueless and lost, encountering something awful, seeing it revealed to himself that the capacity for those awful acts aren't outside him. i suppose then the ending can be read less as a confirmation that the evil has to be driven out by the thing that invents it, law enforcement, the family (all of frank's sexual depravity is particularly based on seeing people certain ways, and seeing them exposed too, he wants to sit and stare at dorothy's vagina, but also that he must be daddy/baby and dorothy is mommy, that she has to confirm herself as such and play a role), and that there's some need for, i don't know, love, inner strength to meet oneself at the threshold of that nightmare and not model oneself after it.

the cop, sandy's dad, doesn't deny it when jeffrey says his job must be amazing, he adds:

it's awful too.

that's an interesting detail. the film is a lot of interesting details, in all honesty i think it feeling so psychoanalytic isn't... well... thinking on this a little more i think it being psychoanalytic is received maybe, as in i received that. i think it is partially, the stuff about fathers tracks, the family, though i think maybe you could see frank as being an image of one who needs these explanations, and needs that to get off basically. he is mostly a force that travels through the world wanting to fuck, fuck being an abstract sort of thing i think, take control, dominate, idk, a lot of the sex stuff feels very based on psychoanalytic thinking, that there is this underlying desire to be subordinate in the dominant thing... all that. but still i think the film at points resists these lines of thought, i think for instance the way it relies on odd little cliches in speech, the cultural images the film dredges up, this points less to anything psychological/internal and more about history's impression upon us, and then the ways we take the past, reform it, mutate it. frank's quoting of in dreams, the way he uses that song to be something menacing, the transformation of lines like:

in dreams i walk with you.

and in this dimension, the uncanny seediness of everything, even family homes at night, they become shrouded by trees, shocks emerging from night, menacing and strange because of how quotidian they are, for their relation to the production of cultural images or their place as cultural images, idk. that's especially compelling to me.

this last shot, i want to point to how tiny jeffrey and sandy are, beside the street, trees, houses, shrubs, and night. they're turned into the object of voyeurism here, rather than our being near and hearing them, we're here turned into an observer, someone on the street, the camera's focus and movement in the film shifts around a lot, it's interesting to notice that people aren't necessarily focused on in normal ways, or ways that feel normal now, space is given more... space, it defines them, rather than they define it i think.

my favorite interiors in this film are the ones of pink stucco, they're totally beautiful to me and where the uncanny qualities really fully express themselves:

(notice how she's so far, how we're watching her from jeffrey's perspective, how the space, this kind of classic apartment, these old things, their odd arrangement, or odd by their normalcy, a little out of place, lived in, disturbed lightly, a thing coming apart almost.)

these last two, one thing i loved in motion, as he moved singing, his shadow behind him. this is a special thing in lynch, the shadows are really captured, and the edges of these rooms too, a darkness, as if reaching out of a void, these kitschy nonplaces emerge and disappear, these living rooms where everything is arranged in such an odd way, or these normal things are revealed as odd, i guess it's that uncovering, that there's this potential in them, or not potential, just that all things speak the nightmare in a way.

another love was the hallway just outside dorothy's room:

confusing and odd, reminds me of my uncle's house at night, the long hallway to their room, the green carpet, dim, darkness coming out from there, it felt like a spewing thing. i love these shadows so much...

speaking on shadows and light:

i love the silhouette of the factory on the entrance to frank's apartment building.

and one more image:

this image was frightening, i forgot about it in fact! but i love it of course, but this brings me to the dreams in this film, where i think the point about fathers becomes more evident, it's hard i guess to know the precise direction of it, there is this ambivalence about it in the film. it's not that there's a puzzle, it's just that jeffrey feels terrified of something, not just frank, but the possibility of not understanding, that he has to go and see, and be wrapped up in the center of the mystery as he puts it, his extremely sick father compels this almost, maybe it's that he's without supervision, no it doesn't feel that way. i'm not sure. i think the psychoanalytic angle doesn't do the film as much of a service really, if you look at it without that, just emotionally, i think, he's compelled by terror, attracted to terror, he's at once depressed and repulsed by his sick father, and wants him to be better, he is in love with dorothy and doesn't like the ways she is, he is i suppose, like i noted earlier, full of this need i've seen, especially men have, where nothing can be let go, everything has to be done completely, exhausted and answered for, but this is an unanswerable thing, the fact of cruelty, that you can contribute to it, that it can spiral out and that the normal world produces it, profits off of it, the club dorothy sings at most likely having something to do with frank, the fact of exploitation and pain and suffering, jeffrey is left wondering, as a child would:

why are there bad people in the world, why are there bad things.

i suppose this makes his compulsion to follow it more emotional for me, in a way it never was before, it feels really sad to think now, trying to uncover some way, some answer in all this, that things might not be as awful as they seem, only finding worse things, always he is shocked when he talks with sandy about what he saw and they're shocking things of course, but he seems still surprised, that there's no way to get things to be better. he thought getting romantically involved with her could help her... there's this tragic naivety to him.

this film is a hard one for me i guess, because honestly, this is a silly thing, but when lynch focuses on women, i think there are lots of reasons he compels me more. he seems to let something down, everything is able to get a lot less rigid, less defined, i think he really exits a lot of freudian impulses by fire walk with me, or twin peaks more broadly, where he more fully focuses on the uncanny and threatening / nightmarish stuff underlying anything normal, where anything might leap out at you, the strangeness of all things. that's here plenty and i love this film, and i think lynch with women can also fall into some pitfalls, even in this film, sandy is sort of magical in ways, and so quickly forgives jeffrey. but i think the point there is partially that they're working on broad strokes of what people might do, as characters, as figures / figments of some kind, their stiffness and strangeness, this kind of dream of people. dorothy saying he put his disease in me, sandy weeping in total pain, the next moment on the phone, forgiving jeffrey, and all being right in the end, i do understand why someone could call the end conservative but i want to resist it, maybe just because i want to love lynch right now, since he is dead. but idk. i mean the film is sort of meant to leave you with that.

immediately after finishing it, really, i was sad, because i wanted to be there longer, in lumberton i suppose, but really, in the nonplaces he conjures, because the things those places say, and the way people appear in them, that's the deeply special thing for me, that's what no one else can really do i feel like. well idk... the whole thing is special. the plot stuff, the character stuff, getting these people to make you feel anything, even as they themselves seem to know, they are figments, weird emanations themselves, of a world that is threatening and only grows more threatening for its methods of attempting to seem safe, normal, all that...

i think tomorrow i will wake up, and something might occur to me about the film. right now i feel a little dumb, idk. i'm having a hard time even pinning down what confuses me, it's not a super complex film, i guess i just want to grasp its heart a little, or one part of its heart, the one where frank and jeffrey are aligned, i suppose looking at jeffrey in the film, i said he is strange already but seeing it now i don't really feel that the film is in love with him, that he's a classic hero, though kyle has the looks of a hero and makes him more dashing and charismatic, he is able to play into him being a pervert and freak though, a strange dual image, of the savior and the underside, a villain of some kind, i don't think the film wants you to believe his of perfect intent, just that he wishes he were, and i also think he wishes he could indulge fully, without a care, he is trapped in the middle, there's a strange tendency in lynch that grows over his work, i think, of really taking issue with masculinity as it exists, the patriarchy on some level too, how aware he was i don't know, but it comes across to me, and here this is still the case, all these confused machinations of the boy hero and frank... it's an odd thing. i don't know. i guess i want to complete my thought that the film isn't so sure of itself on its ending, or not unsure, but that its end might have more to do with an attempt to reconcile oneself with that inbetween state, that fuzziness, the robin eating the bug maybe less a crushing of evil, and more a willingness to engage with it in the first place, i don't know, that's too simple, it's not just to reckon with the abject... i don't know maybe what it is, as an image, is that the abject is constant, this is true, the grandmother says, i couldn't do that, eat bugs. but they are there, a fact, the abject is fact, yes... i don't know how i forgot that word seemingly... it's one of my most beloved notions... looking at the abject here, it becomes evident that in becoming sick, for jeffrey his father becomes abject, frank leaves abjection in his wake, he is breathing it out, a factory for it almost, and the seedy figures he is surrounded by, sandy and jeffrey i think take this on as a playful thing almost, not realizing how much of their world is ruled by the opposition between cleanliness and the other side, by that i mean, sandy's relationship with mike souring, his drunken attempt at violence with jeffrey, that this sort of energy is willing to spill forth or appear anywhere, or that her father is a supposed dam against these things but really, in being what is essentially a waste manager for the social field, someone who creates that division and persecutes along its lines, jeffrey coming across a piece of human, though really what does start all this i feel like is seeing his father cry at his own state, some sense there that he sees himself as a useless thing... and the need for use in the film... there is so much there i guess.

i guess though, really, what lingers the most, is that i wish i were still there, seeing it, in the unfolding, the sprawl and spasm of the story, it really does spasm i think. shocking things, stretches of narrative into dreams and memories, an ending which is dreamlike less because of any overt method employed and more for the swell of all parts of the story into a freaky sequence, everything crashing down, proceeding at a lope, one leg at the pace of a noir, one leg dragged, covered in muck. the film is about the swell of emotions one might see seeing a mudprint on shag carpet, or a coffeestain on a doily... well... that and everything else. but those are parts of it. i love that about it.

i said no more images but one more:

i love that they're freaky animatronics.

okay, i'm sleepy now,

so,

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[miloscat]

[Review] Wario World (GCN)

Wario Land staggers into the 3rd dimension.

Treasure are known primarily for two things: shmups and their Mega Drive action platformer titles. The latter parlayed into Michief Makers on the N64, which spotlighted two of their main strengths as seen in the likes of Gunstar Heroes: boss fights, and grabbing and throwing mechanics. Their first 3D game, the odd Hippa Linda on PS2, definitely leaned into these aspects; I haven't played it but it doesn't seem to have reviewed particularly well. Wario World then fits squarely in that legacy, ostensibly a showcase of these same strengths but so awkwardly handled that they become weaknesses.

On the surface it has the hallmarks of a Wario Land game: Wario's a bruiser who can pick up and chuck enemies, tick. He's hunting for secret areas, coins, and treasures, tick. He can use enemies and objects to interact with his environment, tick. There's required backtracking and mechanics seemingly designed just to waste the player's time, double tick! In adapting to 3D, there's more of a beat-em-up focus now which would be fine if the combat was enjoyable.

Wario has a basic punch combo which doesn't get you very far. Most of the time you're expected to stun an enemy, then grab them. From here you can imprecisely throw them, laboriously spin them, or simply piledrive them. Enemies often respawn almost instantly so there's no good reason to do this unless the level design requires you using one of these actions to proceed, or the game outright traps you into a forced fight. Moving Wario around feels zippy and slippery but the fighting itself is slow and your options are so limited that it never really broke through the tedium barrier for me. There's also only a few types of enemies, and most of the time you'll be slogging through the same faces just reskinned for new levels.

Your main objective in a level is to get red crystals to be able to leave. These are only found inside trapdoors leading to either puzzle rooms or Super Monkey Ball-esque platforming challenges. The controls aren't ideal for precision in these tasks, not to mention the very clunky camera. Most of the time you're looking in at levels diorama-style, which works well enough, but rooms like this open it up... it's fine for these contained sections, but I was glad the rest of the game was more rigid. Anyway, when you get to the end you're able (or possibly required) to return to the start if you didn't find enough stuff, Yoshi's Story style, to explore alternate paths or hidden spots. Aside from the trapdoors, you'll be looking for switches to spawn chests, health upgrades (you only get the boost if you find all the pieces within a level!), and the hint-giving Spritelings.

And speaking of characters who make annoying noises, Charles Martinet is out in full force as Wario with oft-repeated quips and what may be the worst pause screen in the world. The joke of him screeching at you is funny for about two seconds, and then it makes this menu unusable as a pause screen for the entirety of the game. Slow clap for that one. The use of voice clips is good for conveying Wario's personality, which otherwise is a bit let down by the oddly lifeless polygon-shifting animations on his 3D model. But to be fair, he does scratch his bum sometimes, which is pretty funny.

Each and every level ends with a boss fight. Well, OK, there's actually only eight levels—even fewer than Wario Land 4—but they're pretty substantial. Substantial enough that replaying them to get more treasures felt like a bridge too far for me. Anyway, add another boss for each of the four worlds and the final fight, and you have 13 boss fights in all. Some of them have good concepts and fun designs but frequently I found them dragging, overstaying their welcome with repeated patterns. The final boss—an uncharismatic jewel with tentacles—is the worst offender, its boring, padded fight a shockingly weak way to close out proceedings.

Although there's only eight levels, each one has its own well-established setting, from forest ruin to creepy circus to sandy pyramid (this one had the best level design for exploring & backtracking). You can also play them in any order, which is interesting if kind of pointless. The worldbuilding is a bit half-arsed though, as all these environments were just magicked up out of Wario's basement by the evil gem. Actually collecting the collectibles could be more rewarding too; treasures unlock Warioware minigames only playable on a connected GBA, Spritelings are the only thing that determine your ending jpg, and coins are used solely for recovering health or continuing after a game over.

I was hoping Wario World would be a hidden gem of Treasure's hoard, but what I got was an unpolished stone. On paper they seem like a good fit for a new Wario adventure in 2003, but perhaps their inexperience with 3D led to this mediocre result. They don't seem to have made another game like it since, either. Wario World is certainly not all bad, but it really should have been a lot better than this.

[on-noon]

👀, ✨ and 🎬 for the ask game!

👀 What first inspired you to make this story? Does it still influence the wip?

The title! So, I read a book with a terribly generic title that didn't even fit very well, and very annoyed, I tried to come up with a title that would indicate it's genre without being formulaic or boring. I came up with Countdown To Magic, and then wrote a scene and it went from there.

✨ Describe the story with one word, aesthetic, or picture

academy

🎬 Have you daydreamed about an amv/animatic for your wip? Describe it!

I haven't, but if I had to do something, it might be Abora standing in the town square while the Countdown's counting down (either at the beginning or maybe at the end? or both?) and it would flash the countdown and her expression & also what Horatio is doing. and maybe there'd be some other scenes flash in there as well?

words written for this ask: 101

total words for motivation experiment: 13,443

project worked on: Countdown to Magic

[givemethatgold]

Fix’er Upper Pt. 5

Pairing: Frankie Morales x F!Reader

Warnings: Mentions of past abusive relationship, swearing, past drug use, alcohol

Word Count: 1.8k

Notes:

Parts ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR

Your injury, and consequential recovery time, couldn’t have come at a better time. The harvest was done and the apples had to rest before being pressed, which meant Frankie was now free to start working on your home. The work didn’t often require more than two hands so the days found you doing menial tasks being his gopher.

“You know,” Frankie had had to explain to you, “Go’fer this, go’fer that.”

This mainly consisted of you passing him tools while he was swearing under his breath in the attic, or groaning after rapping his knuckles under the sink, or white-faced and clinging to the weathervane on the roof. 

You had discovered Frankie’s sweet tooth on the first day of renovations, not noticing until after he’d left for the day that more than half the cookies you’d baked that morning were already gone. Making sure he was kept happy, you had a new treat ready for when he walked in the door. 

He was a coffee drinker though, and while you owned a coffee press you had never actually used it yourself, preferring tea leaves for your dose of caffeine. You’d tried, the first morning, to make a cup for him. You even googled How to Make a Cup of Coffee? to make sure you didn’t fuck it up. 

You could laugh about it now, but the look on Frankie’s face after he’d taken his first sip made you worry you had poisoned him. He had spat the black sludge out and handed you back the mug with a look of bewildered disgust. Apparently, you needed to grind the beans first, who knew?

An efficient, if not quite comfortable, rhythm had been forged between the two of you over the past week and a half. Frankie would arrive at nine in the morning, scarf down half a dozen treats while discussing the day’s projects. You would run to town in his truck (yours was still at the autobody shop awaiting parts) and buy any supplies that would be needed while he set up the worksites and organized the tools that would be required.

You had added popping into the local café for a large coffee for Frankie and a red rooibos latte with almond milk for yourself. The first couple of days you had bought him a brownie too but stopped after he’d only half-finished the first one and mumbled through the crumbs in his mouth that yours were better. It only took you three days before the owner had your order ready for you before you even walked in the door, five days before you noticed the sidelong glances the little old ladies were giving each other as you walked out.

Small towns, you thought to yourself, rolling your eyes, had the unique benefit and downfall of everyone knowing everyone else’s business. They’d quit with the hardly-concealed smirks if they knew how awkward working with Frankie was becoming.

You had been sure, in the immediate aftermath of waking up in Frankie’s arms while his truck sat in your driveway, that he was never going to speak to you again. The two of you and hopped out and began explaining away whatever conclusions Jacquie and Mark had made. Then Frankie, without even looking in your general direction, told Jacquie to get you inside and have your wrist looked at. 

To his credit, he had taken care of everything regarding your truck for you. The tow truck came and hauled it to the yard, Frankie had commandeered the inspection report and, after calling them out on trying to swindle you into buying unnecessary parts, had ordered what was needed and paid. 

You had, naturally, argued against this but you both knew you weren’t in a position to afford it. Frankie shut down your arguments gracefully, and broke his apparent vow of silence, with a gruff “I’m just doing it so I can drive my damn truck without you changing the radio station.” The absolute charmer.

It was your damn house, though, so you decided you'd talk as much as you wanted and it would be up to him to interact. Either that or you had music blaring from the radio, never playing his favourite country station purely out of spite. 

Never quite sure if he was listening or not, you rambled on about anything and everything. You explained your vision for the house and the plans you had for a greenhouse in the yard. Memories from your childhood were described in great detail, as were embarrassing stories from your year in college. Baking tips, waxing poetic about your love for sunflowers, interesting animal facts, you'd even downloaded a Word of the Day App and made a game of fitting the words into your daily uninterrupted monologues.

It took three days for Frankie to break.

You had been reminiscing about your trip to Disneyland as a child when he abruptly cut in, voice muffled due to the nails being held between his lips.

"You never talk about it."

You assumed he was referring to the little all-day nap you’d shared in his truck, as it had yet to be spoken of, but were taken aback by the slight accusatory tone.

"Talk about what?"

He took so long to reply, you started to think that he had interrupted purely to shut you up. The silence demanded an explanation though, so you kept your mouth shut and waited.

Clambering down from the attic, where he had been strengthening the trusses throughout the sagging section of roof, Frankie pinned you with his gaze and softly repeated himself.

"You never talk about it. The time in your life when you were married." He must have seen your hackles rise because he quickly set down the hammer and held his hands up in a placating wave.

"You still haven't answered my question about being in the army," was your quick response, finished with an ever-so-mature, "so there."

With a resigned sigh, Frankie twisted his hat around backward and scrubbed his hands across his face. "Come on" -waving you towards the patio doors- "these kinds of conversations require fresh air and a drink."

Reluctantly you followed him outside but rather than sinking down onto the porch swing you opted to lean against the post facing it. Opening two ciders, which you now had free access to, you handed one to Frankie and watched him over the top of the bottle.

Half of your drink was gone and your mind had wandered to greenhouse and flower garden placement before Frankie spoke again. His voice low and quiet catching you by surprise.

"Yeah," he broke the silence with another ragged sigh, "I, uh, I served. Started in the Air Force, worked my way up to Special Tactics Squadron. Made enough noise there to get recruited to Delta Force."

"Oh, fuck," your exclamation was soft with shock "you've seen some shit then." Blast your runaway mouth and its inability to wait for your brain to catch up before blurting out your inner thoughts. "I'm sorry!-"

"No, it's okay" Frankie interrupted, trying to reassure you and remove the horrified look that had come across your face. 

"No, no, that was totally uncalled for. Brad, my um, my husband, he was a Marine. He hated talking about it, said no one liked talking about it. I should have known."

"It's not that," Frankie reassured you again, "You were the first person to ever ask me about it, in all the time I've lived here. Just took me by surprise."

Leaning over in the swing, Frankie pulled out his wallet from his back pocket and handed you a photo from inside it. Five men beamed up at you. You could recognize them from a few of the photos that had rested on Frankie's mantle, they looked older in this one.

"Tell me about them?" you asked, knowing that most of the request was due to curiosity but a small part of you hoped that if you kept him talking you could avoid the subject of your marriage.

The sun was beginning to set and you'd long moved inside to eat dinner by the time Frankie was done sharing. It must have been cathartic, you mused, for him to bare this much about himself. He had never looked more relaxed in all the time you'd known him, which wasn't saying much and it could just as easily been due to the amount of alcohol thrumming through his system.

The room fell into a companionable silence, each of you digesting the information that had been revealed. You were in awe of the fact that, despite the life of violence he had witnessed, Frankie still maintained his humanity. Even after a messy divorce and lost custody battle, Frankie continued to choose the path of healing. He was clean, was fighting for shared custody of his daughter again, running his own business, and still had found time to endear himself into the town's hearts.

Frankie was, for all his sharp edges and gruff words, a sweetheart.

It put into stark comparison how Brad had reacted to the lemons life had served him. Born into an upper-middle-class home, the only son, doted on by his parents, Brad had been raised into a life where every door was open to him. Despite this, or maybe because of it, he had grown hateful of those weaker than him. He was controlling but had just the right amount of charm to pass it off as caring.

"I've met men like that," 

You nearly jumped out of your skin from surprise. Looking at Frankie with wide-eyed shock you wondered again what the hell was in the cider. This was the second time you'd poured your heart out to a virtual stranger, but this time you hadn't even realized you'd started speaking your thoughts aloud. 

Squaring your shoulders and holding Frankie's gaze you continued, almost challenging him to find someone worse than Brad had been.

"He made me quit college because he said he wanted to start a family. Then berated me and acted like it was all my fault every time the pregnancy test came back negative. You know what that asshole did?" Tears were threatening to fall but you held on to Frankie's gaze, "He had gotten a vasectomy months earlier. I didn't find out about it until after he died; going through paperwork that had been stored in his desk."

Frankie was up on his feet now, pacing around the kitchen island, too distraught to keep still. How could anyone be so cruel? Let alone be so cruel to someone as sweet and pure as you. He hated seeing you cry but knowing you weren't receptive to people being in your personal space, wasn't sure how to comfort you. 

Acting on pure instinct he grabbed the kettle and started preparing you some tea, not allowing himself to ruminate how he knew which flavour you preferred. Setting your favourite pottery mug in front of you, along with the little honey pot, he also decided to grab the fluffy throw blanket off your couch. 

"I get it now," he thought to himself offhandedly, "why women have so many fuckin' blankets and pillows in every room."

Placing the throw around your shoulders he was preparing to say goodnight and let you have some peace but was stilled by your hand reaching up and covering his.

"Please. Stay."

Part SIX

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[toujoursmiraculous]

Thoughts and Reaction to Guiltrip!

Alright, so this one is a bit more of a serious one for me. But I'll be going in order of the episode so the more serious talk will be a bit further down! First thing we get is this lovely moment:

I've already addressed it in a post, but I'll say it again here. Guiltrip is episode 11, several episodes take place before Guiltrip that we haven't seen yet, so this is awhile after Marinette and Luka broke up. We also know that Marinette has always had feelings for Adrien, even when she was with Luka. Luka always knew that fact too. None of this is new and is to be expected, obviously, when Love Square is endgame. But! I also want to point out here that this is just a soft look. Very gentle, very common. I see people looking at each other both in real life and in other shows all the time. A look that says "I adore you". And I think it's sweet! Very subtle, but enough. Something's wrong with Rose. We never get told (in this episode anyway) what it is, but it's a chronic illness that's a worry in Rose's life, ever since she was young. I feel really bad for Juleka, knowing that her friend's been struggling with an illness, and whenever something happens she has to worry about it alone. Also that really sucks when you try to cheer somebody up and make a joke, that because you were mislead about a situation you end up making things worse. Poor Marinette. :c Adrien when he realizes he's bumped into someone (and the pink bubbles to remind us of Marinette's feelings for him):

Adrien when he realizes just who it was he bumped into!:

Scroll up now and look at how Marinette was looking at Adrien earlier that day. It's the exact same look. Yet, something feels different from usual to me, idk. But continuing on. Marinette gets slightly jumbled with her words, but manages to give herself a kick and says nope not now! Good for her! You can't expect to change overnight, but she's working on it.

She looks to the side, gathering her surroundings for a split second and she misses the top step. I'd like to say that this is just a joke for the show but well, this kind of thing has happened to me a lot because I'm that much of a klutz so I feel for her here. (On Halloween I forgot that there was another step as I was walking down as I wasn't paying attention. I couldn't walk on my foot for 2 weeks. It's a serious problem, guys. Really. xDD) Marinette had told Adrien she's concerned it was something she said that upset Juleka and Adrien tells her while sometimes she doesn't make sense, what she says is never mean. This scene reminds me of when Ladybug's worried about something and Chat Noir's there to keep her grounded and remind her of how things really are. I very much appreciate seeing such a scene with Adrienette! Makes the Love Square much more rounded. Also the way he stops her and says let him go talk to her to try to help the situation and any possible misunderstandings from taking place. ;-;

Can I just say... oh my gosh. He went from determined, to hearing Marinette trying to comfort her, to looking with confidence "This girl is amazing." and the whole Ladynoir vibe I'm getting from this scene makes me happy. The thing that's unrealistic about this scene though is you expect to tell me that 8 kids went down those stairs and came up behind them and Marinette, Adrien, and Juleka didn't hear? XD Now here's where the serious comes in. Rose is hospitalized with an illness we don't know about, but has been a long-term thing that has Juleka really worried a lot. That must be so stressful :c I'm going to be honest and say I never really saw Julerose romantically. Like I can see how people do, but to me, I could see that their bond was really unique. It didn't really fit completely in the "BFF" category either. But if felt like there was more to them that I didn't really understand. I think the best example off the top of my head was during Zombizou, when Rose was going to help Chloe after she slid down Chat's stick and she went too fast for him to catch her. Juleka seemed especially worried and concerned for her. Rose never seemed to get concerned about Juleka in the same way Juleka was about Rose. Juleka's always been more protective and worried and it was always one of those things that made me go "hmm, interesting". Now this episode finally explains why and I'm honestly super glad for it. Because this kind of a relationship is not a common one in media, especially kids media. Partially because having such serious illnesses in young people is not particularly common, and having someone who's so caring and protective of that person is even less common. And most people probably don't realize how amazing it is to have health problems and then have someone in their life who acts like Juleka does for Rose. I had a life-threatening illness as a kid, one that still affects me greatly today. When in school, my friends knew about it without me having to say anything unfortunately, and while they didn't usually treat me differently, sometimes they were pretty ignorant and didn't understand why I wasn't "normal" like them. They asked questions that were harder ones to answer, and tended to forget my answers. I got a lot of "I know you have X problem but I still don't see why you can't..." as well as thinking I was lying if I said I wasn't well and couldn't go to a party, and that was hard to deal with, being limited in what you can do which makes you different and being judged for things out of your control. So seeing these kids who only know something's wrong with her, but are willing to do so much to make her life better and happier, not judging her at all, wanting to take care of her no questions asked was really heart-warming for me. I only had one friend during that time that was anything close to this. I never had to explain anything to him if I didn't want to. He never asked me personal questions I didn't want to answer. And he seemed to know what he could do to make things for me easier if I was having a hard time without me ever saying so. And this is another reminder to me that this show is aimed at kids. To show kids that they'll likely encounter someone around their age that's going through something serious like a health problem, and what that kid needs most is kindness and not to be made to feel like they're even more different from the other kids than they already feel. The way they handled that aspect of it for such a short, limited intro to it, I think they did good. I discussed this next bit with a friend. She mentioned it first, the trope where those with chronic or serious illnesses are usually an "inspiration". With this episode, you kind of get the feeling that because Rose's been through so much, she's therefore a really positive and bubbly person and it kind of gives off the vibe that if you don't view things the way she does, then you're not doing it right. "What matters isn't the problem, but how you handle it." While I agree with this, and that when you come out of or regularly deal with

such hard times, automatically trying to see the world better and brighter can easily happen, but it's not exactly realistic either, at least not to the extent Rose and other people the media has portrayed. For one, I think you have to have always been more of that kind of person from the start to realistically be so positive. As my friend said and I agree, positivity is just who Rose is, she's not who she is just for the sake of a trope. But honestly, when you've gone through something so difficult, and if life continues to throw you more difficulties on top of it, being positive so much can sometimes turn into a negative and be harmful too. When you've been through a lot, it's important to allow yourself to feel the negative too because it's part of dealing with such problems. And if you've been through a lot in life and you haven't come out of it being all sunshine and rainbows, always looking on the brighter side of things, that's perfectly okay. Life's hard and tends not to work out how we'd like, or even for the better sometimes. If being positive and hopeful after struggling is hard to do, you're not bad or wrong for feeling that way, everybody handles things differently. c: ANYWAY, moving on to the rest of the episode! Juleka being all irritated and worried that the class was going to expose her spilling Rose's secret xD While the situation isn't ideal, it's nice that this is the most involved she's seemed with everyone in the entire duration of the show. But Rose knows something's up, and I love that she talks to her about it and realizes that she should've told everyone herself instead of Juleka being the only one who knew. Which has been such a burden on her. (Oh no, what if this is a reflection of Alya knowing Marinette's Ladybug later on? I'm hoping not.) Ugh these children and how much they care about Rose! These kids are the absolute best. But then they kind of ruin it a little with going overboard. Which, frankly, I think is just ignorance of her situation really. I mean, we don't know what exactly is wrong with Rose. Just that she ends up in the hospital. If they knew about her condition, what causes her to get sick, what to look out for, etc, they'd be much more informed and much less likely to be frantic whenever something's not perfectly "normal" with her. All of these kids are going to be overprotective parents someday, aren't they?

Okay so like... are Adrien and Marinette going to question at all how Ladybug and Chat Noir showed up immediately after Juleka was akumatized, and no damage had happened outside of the school for it to be known to the public? Literally the only ones that could've possibly known were the class to have shown up that fast. ??? I am confusion. "I can't help my best friend face his father." "No, Nino..." Two things: The fact that THIS is what he's feeling guilty about? My poor Nino! Dx I just love him, he really doesn't get enough love and appreciation imo. Also, um, isn't Ladybug like right by Chat? Didn't she hear that? What? Idk but I feel like we're really missing something here. Usually we get things that are kind of hints, that make us wonder if they know right, but this? This is a bit too blaring-in-your-face, and there's two major things so close together. Really strange. Chat about to use Cataclysm on himself. Good grief that was not expected. Chat Blanc threatened to destroy himself along with everything else. Now Chat Noir while affected with negative emotions from an akuma almost Cataclysmed himself. This show really is getting deep and dark isn't it. o.o Also is there something Adrien needs to work out with someone...? Daizzi and Rose saying the other's so cute, ugh they're both so cute! And Pigella's costume and transformation is so adorable omg. Okay so Pigella's power allows people to see their biggest wish, the thing that'd make them the most happy and feel positive emotions. I know some people probably think "That's it?" Considering that Shadow Moth preys on people's negative emotions, such a power is actually extremely useful facing Shadow Moth. (And let's not forget, that while that's her power, she has the ability to fight and make a difference just from being transformed too) BUT AWWW Juleka's wish! And her face when Pigella said it aloud. ;-; Am I the only one wondering if Pigella may someday use her power on Shadow Moth and that's how they learn his motive? I'm so impressed with how Rose knew how to handle everything. She knew she can't slip up with Juleka. She knew to sneak away to detransform and come back as Rose. She knew to subtly give the Miraculous back so nobody would ever know she had it. Even Chat Noir had no idea! I don't know why, I'm just so very proud of that. "She doesn't need a Miraculous to be a superhero." She really has the characteristics of one, and I can't wait to see more of Pigella. Also I'm really wondering. This scene here:

All the kids that are part of that friend group are there...except Marinette and Adrien, of course. Alya knows why Marinette isn't there. But is she wondering about why Adrien isn't there too? LOL Marinette being like "I'm taking your pillow back, sorry! Gotta wait for it like everyone else." and the boys being like LE GASP. Marinette's right, she's not fragile! The fact Rose jokes with her and makes everyone laugh, and Chloe saying "Hey, why doesn't everyone laugh when I say something like that?!" Adrien: Because in your case, it's never a joke. Chloe: Hm, that's true. Which is super funny, especially how he just so casually says it. But also it really shows again how Chloe wants to be liked. She wishes the kids would laugh when she makes comments, but it's because they're said in a serious/obnoxious way, instead of making light of something like in Rose's case here, that they don't. I know she talked about it with Ladybug in an episode, but it again shows that that's what she'd like. All that needs to happen is someone helping her get there. Maybe Zoe and Luka will somehow help with that later on. Anyway, this was a really great episode! I feel like some things might not make quite as much sense as they should if we got it in order, but what can you do when Gloob has to air them? Even a friend of mine who's been doing what she can to avoid spoilers, still got spoiled. She's having to delete tumblr to avoid future spoilers because people can't help themselves and tag things properly. So thanks Gloob. :P All we wanted was the episodes in order. We've waited this long for S4, we can wait a bit longer. But they gotta make money I guess. I'm glad other countries are trying their best to keep it in order anyway. c: Guiltrip also has some really great Adrienette moments, and covered a more serious topic which was really interesting and shows how much the show's changing. Especially with some of the choice of camera angles and movements! Like the zoom-in on the door with Adrien and Marinette, the boys LE GASP scene. Very cool artistic choices! Looking forward to the episodes that come before this one to try to help fill in some of the gaps! And apologies to those that frequently read these posts from me, I started writing it up late and couldn't finish so you get it the day after instead. xD