#but they are MINE cringefail losers

[fridgrave2-0]

they gave me brainworms im sorry

[lazuliquetzal]

Ten months after Damian moves out, Batman kicks the bucket, leaving Batman's one and only son to inherit a city that hates his guts. No one, not even the weird kid that keeps interrupting his patrols in the middle of the night, wants Nightwing in Gotham. There's only one way forward, and everyone knows it. It should be simple for Damian to step into his father's place, except for the fact that it's impossible. ___ In which the universe validates Damian's teen rebellion, and Tim gets a really good grade at being a Bat-Fan (something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve).

I've officially lost my marbles and written a Reverse Robins AU. you're welcome, I think.

[williamrikers]

kinnporsche really said "this slick evil mafia boss is going to fall in love with the weirdest most cringefail country boy imaginable and their sex WILL be problematic and extremely kinky" and then they just Did That

[sevinite]

almost forgot to post these beautimous angels here <3 ophelia (left, he/she) and chel (right, she/her) are my brain’s new favorite couple in the world [chel belongs to @chattycanine who i’m sure is SIIIIIIICK of me tagging him all over the internet today]

[poritora]

Spidersonaaa🇰🇿✨

[clowningaroundmars]

smthn i REALLY wanted to see more of was the burners lil winter outfits 🥺 ESPECIALLY CHUCK

[finniigan]

When I started 100 days my prince, no one warned me not to get attached to Mu-yeon,,,, no one told me he'd die T.T 🌼

anyway so in my head he eloped with the princess and they settled in some far off village to raise their kid :) and nothing bad ever happens to them :)

[sillos-vanillos]

sitting at home feeling very insecure about the fact that i don't know drug slang words

[beauzos]

y'all Discworld readers don't respect Rincewind. i know Discworld doesn't respect him either but come on KRKFJ

he's my fave! actually, a vast majority of the Discworld books i've read have all been Rincewind's. i think i've read every single Rincewind book, and then i read Equal Rites, read part of Wyrd Sisters and couldn't finish it, read Mort and maybe a couple others. Rincewind is just so lovableeee like what am i supposed to do. overall i love the wizards

ik it's blasphemy but i've read no Sam Vimes books sorry. i plan to eventually though

[sparklingsora]

yeah sure i guess this is how i'll introduce my roleswap au. anyway yeah the good guys swap with the bad guys whaaaaaaat?!?!?!? god i cant believe this au has been consuming my brain for the past several weeks and now i cant even describe it properly. some character refs and descriptions under cut:

imagine, if you will, you are a man with a tv for a head. and lets just say, hypothetically, that you were friends with a powerful overlord. a powerful overlord named alastor. and lets just say for the sake of this argument, that this powerful overlord named alastor died in an extermination. so lets assume that you open a hotel to rehabilitate sinners with your girlfriend with the help of this magical cat you found. (and then, lets say, hypothetically, that this powerful overlord named alastor turns out to be alive after all and now he's avoiding you and you are very pissed about it)

okay and NOW imagine, if you will, you are the daughter of lucifer, one of the highest ranking angels in heaven, but you got kicked out of heaven for being a cringefail loser. and also imagine that unknown to you your girlfriend is actually an angel sent by your shitty dad to watch over you because he still cares??? i guess??? somewhat??? though he's still shitty anyway PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE send me asks about this au ive got so much lore sitting in this brain of my mine PLEASE I WILL EXPLODE IF I DONT GET IT OUT INTO THE WORLD

[serialadoptersbracket]

Bonus Round: Elric Brothers Custody Battle (aka “mod’s brother is going to kill her”)

(As before with the Narumitsu edition, winner of this custody battle gets the kids)

Submitted kids:

Izumi Curtis, Roy Mustang: Edward and Alphonse Elric

Propaganda under the cut!

Izumi Curtis:

“#Are we really leaving teacher in the dust here #The things she did for the elric brothers' world view #Also mine. As a young child who would grow up into a big strong lesbian #Her and her husband sig? I'm sorry to say but this too is yuri #Goals. I look at sig Curtis and I go. My God. I have to get butcher #Ba dum tss #G. Get it #Because he. Because they run a b. A butcher shop he's a butcher”

Roy Mustang:

1. “This pathetic cringefail loser of a man managed to raise and guide two traumatized children into becoming well-adjusted adults. He also gets bonus points because those kids end up saving the world from disaster.

Also he's hot sometimes”

2. “He has two(2) sons!!!!! Weird little traumatized children!!!! He's also soooo dad shaped(a mass murderer)!!!! He such a loser too!! I love him so much I wanna chew on him <3”

3. “ok i'm not into fma buts its a popular source and my oomfs r into it and i hear a lot about them. like top five things i hear about whenever i hear them talk about fma. hashtag war criminal family swag”

[beanghostprincess]

Absolutely wild but I am obsessed with crack ships, specifically Buggy ones.

Like.

Franky and Buggy. Blue haired boyfriends. Luffy finds out his shipwright slept with THE CLOWN. his dad's EX?? I mean he likes Buggy well enough, sure, they Bonded in prison and Lu actually looks forward to the yearly fight to the death with his uncle, it's fun.

But FRANKY, WHY??? WHERE ARE YOUR STANDARDS???

"He's SUPERRRR."

"Oh okay, understandable."

<><><><>

Shanks, drunk and missing his ex: I just miss him so much, ya know?? Sometimes... sometimes I can still smell his perfume....

Benn, completely dead faced: oh yeah no that's me. He and I spent a lovely night together.

Shanks: >:0

Benn: you weren't lying about that mouth of his-

Shanks: WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME???

Benn: pretty boy knew what he wanted, man, what do you want from me-?

<><><><>

Buggy: oh I almost got bingo!

Alvida: what are you talking about

Buggy: this guard at Impel Down had this bingo card, so I took the idea and made it my own!

Alvida: .... this is a list of people to sleep with.

Buggy: Yeah! :oD

Alvida: ..... how did you manage so many of these without ever getting five in a row??

Buggy: skillz

Al: you're just a whore

Buggy: why would you @ me like that??? Rude!!!

<><><><>

Crocodile: the clown left his bingo card...

Mihawk: oh?

Croc: you know that if he slept with one of us, it would have given him three spaces?

Hawk: of course. I have been dropping subtle hints since the beginning.

Croc: you like his cringefail charm too?

Mihawk: my standards are abysmal. You know this.

Croc: .... yeah. Mine too. So we're seducing him?

Mihawk: of course we are.

<><><><>

Buggy: I think they're planning to kill me-

So what I'm hearing here is that Buggy is a slut and I absolutely love him. As he should, tbh. His failguy personality and loser clown energy with trauma and uncertain mood swings captivates all pirates.

[andypantsx3]

i think a lot of the charm with your stories and how many of them have the guy just unwaveringly in love is the reader is just. a girl. like we’re just a girl we just do our job we go eat soup we sleep we put our fuzzy socks on one tootsie at a time but at the end of the day we’re just a girl going about our daily lives thinking (and i mean this in the most gender neutral way possible like we’re just one of the girls you know) anyways the point is we’re just Normal Girl just a girl but the love interest is always like. yes. that one. that one is mine yes the anxious one over there

sjdgjsjdfhkjl shh don't be this nice to me or my head will get too big to fit through the door!!! Ahhh thank you so much for thinking my stories have charm though sjdshdfkl I cannot tell you how charmed I am by that compliment in particular!! 🥺

It's true though!! I love the space in fanfiction people have carved out to write about the best, coolest, most badass versions of themselves too but I love a Normal Girl the most!! Maybe because I have accepted how aggressively average I am lmao but I cling to the idea that you don't have to be special to be loved. And the most lovable traits about people are not how cool and badass they are; it's their core human characteristics!!

I think we all love our special people for the little things about them; how someone tries so hard to be good despite a hot temper, how someone remembers you love soup & sends you 11 soup tiktoks a day, how someone never fails to make cringey puns even at inopportune moments. How people see the world and hope for the best and do their best even if they are cringefail losers sometimes (me) lol.

And I like to hope and wish for that kind of love always persevering!!

[ham1lton]

lando isn’t my fav driver so i didn’t care too much for landoyn but your characterization of him is really funny lmaooooo i love a cringefail bf and hot sexy gf <3

lando isn’t mine either 😭 my top three are oscar, lewis and charles (not in that order) but i just love writing for him?? also in the beginning of this account, i got sm lando requests so i really learnt how to fine tune my version of him. thank you so much for this ask!!! it’s really sweet and i’m so glad u enjoy my loser!lando <3

[enpr-ss]

Descending into Double Life Insanity here I gooooo:

And immediately Scar and Bdubs continue the tradition of watching someone do their intro and heckling Etho for his terrible upload schedule (yet another strong techno vibe). ETHO’S JEALOUS THAT HE DIDNT GET BDUBS LOL The disappointment from BOTH OF THEM. Joel didn’t even need to say it. Incredible. And of course Etho immediately tries to figure out the loopholes in the shared damage / slight kickback. PERFECT CUTOUT SCREAM. TANGO DIED?!?? LOL. and is that how the ranchers found each other? Their mischievous shenanigans… truly a pair. “EEFO! CAREFUL” the first of many. JOEL DIED BY BREAKING THE BOAT?!? THE ENDERMAN?? AGAIN??? SECOND TO TANGO??? IN THE FIRST EPISODE??? LOOOOOL HIS CRINGEFAIL LOSER STREAK CONTINUES. Why didn’t they eat. They’re both so stupid omg. Huh is this the origin of Boat Boys. There’s absolutely no way that Scar doesn’t know. He’s gotta be trolling Grian. Bro is too tired to craft a fishing rod. He actually led the pillagers to bdubs. Omg. That was so chaotic.

Why is Joel wearing Etho’s face. Why. Etho and his extremely flammable bases. Why. Divorce Quartet is so toxic omg. And Bdubs and Impulse sowing seeds of doubt, doing to Etho what he tried to do to them. Etho with his insane eye for eye punishment. “Just a little bit short, just like in real life” WARDEN??? Everyone must have been watching the achievements and going wild. I cannot believe they put the enchanter down there. Everyone flees with extra flee while Impulse and Etho are just CHILLING. IMPULSE AND ETHO HAVE PLOT ARMOR!!! Omg what a lovely boat. THE RELATION-SHIP?!? LOOOL. The etho face actually coming in clutch. Gossip girls omg. AND THEY ARE BACK ON THEIR PILLAGER BULLSHIT. How did Joel not see Pearl right there. Pearl is such a crazy ex holy shit.

“I’m going to do a little bit of resource gathering” say Impulse right as Etho and Joel waterfalls away having already mined all of it. Voice prox setting off the shriekers is actually so good. Tango… wool and nametag?? Is he going to bring the warden up? And also look at Boat Boys pysching out Jimmy. Desertduo falling apart at the seams. Joel is so ride or die with Etho’s crazy ideas. Cleo and Martyn yikes. And Boat boys bullying Jimmy again. How does Etho always follow along with Scar’s shenanigans. Look at them heckling Bdubs. Pearl is CRAZY. Babysitting went so well. “He took me to a bad place….” With all the arrows. ALL THAT DIGGING WITH THAT DISTRACTION AND LIKE HALF THE SERVER AND THEY DIDNT EVEN FIND IT. MOLES INDEED. “How about I sell you some sugarcane, Joel I will sell yOU SOME SUGARCANE” as he finds it. Truly a watcher voice moment right there. LOL. JOEL’S INVENTORY WAS FULL HAHAHAAH. That whole thing was such a circus! And then Tango’s Warden. Of course Joel shoots it and is cowering from it on a tower. And of course everyone gathers round to punch desertduo into the Warden’s waters. That was fucking wild.

They are fishing the warden??? They’re nuts. Joel-Grian-Etho standoff LOL. Fishing shenanigans never fails to be utterly hilarious. And Grian stuck the landing!!!! That was pretty cool. THE WARDEN FLEW SO HIGH AND LANDED RIGHT AMONG THEM OH MY GOD. AND IT DIED FROM FALL DAMAGE??? HAHAHAAH. THE SHEER PANIC AND GRIEF. Omg I thought they were going to die there. Etho with the clutch save but also with the bad ideas. “It’s good to be lit as the children say.” “You are hip and trendy and down with those kids.” “Don’t patronize me, you 35-year old man.” “I’M 29!!” Of course Scar stole the enchanter. Why does he keep doing that. What was that Etho growl before the chain fishing. Of course Joel dies; what did they expect. THE FIRST RED MURDER!!! Rip Scott. He was disappointed but not surprised; even set his spawn LOL. The moment Joel goes red he’s speedrunning unhingedness. He’s bloodthirsted killed Pearl just like how Pearl killed him in Last Life. Rip Scott indeed. And then it happens again LOL. And of course they get double poisoned. Etho saving their gear and their lives there. Joel goes for Scar and Etho for Grian. They are SO scared. Scar back on his enchanter bs. Scar keeping quiet because his pandas lives hang in the balance. When Joel goes all high pitched HAHAHA The way Scott Cleo and Joel all turn and look at Etho like he’s the only one that can understand what’s going on with Bdubs and his horse breeding!!! The moment Tango has access to the enchanter and Boat Boys and basically everyone is so down to murder the Ranchers!!! Nothing beats Voice prox mod when someone is falling or ascending. That was a pretty cool clutch from Scar. Grian keeps using end of the session for his advantage lol. HE KILLED JIMMY!!!

REN WHAT ARE YOU DOING. Boat boys in sync as they both shoot the TNT minecart; Etho breaks it and Joel picks it up.

LOL Bro blowing up all those pandas was horrifying omg. THE ENCHANTER WAS IN THE CHEST THE ENTIRE TIME. IT WAS JUST HIDDEN UNDER ONE BLOCK. THEY COULD HAVE ACCIDENTALLY BLOWN IT UP. Etho what you saying. You’re comparing Joel to a Tiger??? Bro his ego will never be the same again. What have you done. Grian is definitely a distraction and a lure. WHAT IS THAT FACE. WHAT.

Tango and Jimmy come crawling back HAHAH. Etho condescending to them about water elevators Desert duo cowering from the reds and then the zombie gets them. LOL. AND THEN A CREEPER ENDERMEN GETS JIMMY LOOOOOL. OH MY GOD. The Red Army actually got them. ETHO BARELY SET THE TNT TRAP, THE MOST OBVIOUS TRAP IN THE WORLD, BEFORE SCAR IS BRIDGING OVER TO STEAL IT. I HAD THOUGHT IT WAS SITTING THERE LONG ENOUGH THAT NO ONE WAS SCARED OF IT BUT NO. NOT EVEN A MINUTE GOES BY AND SCAR JUST GETS HIMSELF BLOWN UP. HAHAHAHAA. Joel is so happy that a trap worked first try. Jellie in a backpack is adorable though. Grian is just accepting of his fate; he’s done. (Why are we here, just to suffer) What is that whole conversation with Impulse and Bdubs. They’re so weird. Fire spreads real fast on this server huh. “The ship burns everything burns”. Boat boys just egging each other on. That long look at Box earlier was just perfect foreshadowing. OH MY GOD ETHO NEARLY DIED BUT REN GOT IT!!! That’s so many deaths in one episode. Oh Scar absolutely burned it down, look at him hiding behind Grian. Scar literally hurt himself IRL out of indignation over the enchanter.

“Honey I’m home!” ETHO. Joel LOTR nerd. Ah yes Grian with the same idea as Etho with the bubblevator tnt. But this time he said it louder so they did it and probably didn’t work since Joel did it. Scar third wheeling Boat boys and all of them then heckling Grian as he sets up the sculk sensor trap. At least he redeems himself by setting off the tnt trap intentionally. Etho aiming his crossbow right at Scott and him being unaware until he turns around, along with all the frantic whispering due to the warden, is such a classic movie scene. Joel is SO concerned and guides Etho out with the sound of his voice LOL. He did choose Joel’s water over Bdubs’ ladders but the water ran out. Rip Pearl. What is this polycule. Wait did Bdubs and Impulse really trap the portal? Doesn’t seem like their style. And given the smooth stone + dirt it kinda seemed like their portal linked up with another one. Huh. THEIR BEDS WERE TOGETHER LOL. Ah yeah they figured it out too. Omg if the ship burns everything burns. Including them.

This series was so fast-paced and dramatic! The pairs really brought out something within each other. It's always great to see laidback people go feral on red. And all the jokes about "welp guess I'll just die" because their partner was doing something dangerous NEVER gets old. Truly the stuff of fanart and fanfiction. Grian must have been scrolling too much on Twitter when he decide to go through with this idea.