#but these are new thoughts i only just started rotating in my mind
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gristlegrinder ¡ 9 months ago
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tbh if we get a woodland cascades expansion, besides being very exciting in terms of revisiting issues surrounding the centaurs and the aftermath of the charr civil war, i also think it would give them space to expand on some stuff from SOTO— namely, stuff involving the bastion of the penitent and the mursaat— in a way that would be extremely cool and probably help with some of the “disjointedness” people feel with the ward’s place in tyria. fingers crossed baby
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parfaitblogs ¡ 3 months ago
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(totally not based on my day) but a simple request for spencer helping reader out with a bunch of chores bc she's overwhelmed with life and she decides to thank him with like the quote "best head of his life" and he's like "its okay you dont have to do that" and she's responds "but i am anyways"
it will come back ❀ s. reid x reader
in which spencer reid helps you when you're (very) overwhelmed, and you might need to return the favour.  pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader genre: comfort & smut (18+ mdni) tags: oral (m receiving). praise. established relationship. reader's overwhelmed overstimulated overworked... very enthusiastic head giver!reader. use of honey and angel. they love each other a lot. i love them a lot. i don’t think there’s d/s dynamics but if there are it’s soft dom spencer (nobody’s shocked). word count: 3.1k a/n: thank u sooo much for reading my brain ily i need to give spencer reid head asap. new format/layout for requests sort of its the same as my normal post layout... do we like... i sure freaking hope so. as always lmk if u liked this or even if u didn't but preferably if u did!!
You were exhausted. For three weeks straight, you had been working nonstop, with a wondrous total of eight hours in between shifts. You were hardly sleeping, you had hardly had a social life, hell, you never even had time to enjoy the simple pleasures of an everything shower. You felt groggy, and cramped, and everyday felt like an awful repeat of the last. A nightmare that never ended. 
Never mind the fact that you hadn't seen your boyfriend.
Always home too late to be with him in the evenings, and up too early to get coffee with him before your days started. Spencer was so patient with you, regardless. He knew it would end eventually, and he would get his girlfriend back. It was just for the month, was what you would text each other whenever the other began feeling particularly lonely. He didn't even like texting, but the time for a simple phone call wasn't available to you anymore. 
And your apartment. Every time you stepped into it you swore a new dirty dish materialised in your sink, or a new pile of clothes sat themselves in your bedroom floor. Which was odd, because you had rotated between the same two outfits for the last eighteen days — your work uniform, or your pyjamas. 
You were overwhelmed with it all. Even as your hectic work life came to an end, and you were waking up to the sunlight pouring into your room, instead of an alarm clock while the moon was still up. You were acutely aware of the mess of your apartment, and just the thought of it all left you lying motionless in your bed, staring up at the ceiling. 
Tears stung your vision as you felt the seconds tick into minutes, and nothing happened. Attempting to will yourself to get up, and yet you simply couldn't. Exhausted beyond belief, with limbs sinking into the mattress and melding to the sheets. 
You faintly heard the click of your front door lock, and if you had any more motivation in you, you'd probably get up to double check it was the only other person who had a key to your apartment, and not a burglar. Thankfully, you didn't have to, for Spencer was calling out your name, gently.
Too exhausted to even reply and alert him of where you were, you lay still until he had found you in your bedroom, his bad dropping by the doorway, feet shuffling against the rug. 
"Good afternoon," he said, finding a seat on the edge of your bed, hand resting atop your thigh, gentle circles being rubbed into the skin. 
"Is it already afternoon?" you asked him, voice quiet. 
"Yeah. How long have you been awake in bed?" 
"I don't know," you answered, voice awfully small as you felt the thick weight of frustration with yourself blanket over you. "I need to get up. The apartment's a mess."
"It's allowed to be," he said. "You've been doing sixteen hour days."
"Yeah, but I'm not today. I have the day off."
"Your first day off in weeks. I'd be concerned if you'd spent it productively."
You stared at him, unsure if the irritation that settled in your bones was because of his insistence that you not doing a thing was okay, or your exhaustion. Logically, it would be the latter. You did know that, deep down. 
Upon seeing your eyes delve into something a little more desperate, he sighed, hand sliding up to your own, gently tugging you up into a seated position. His eyebrows knitted together at your exhausted look, and you could see his brain ticking behind his eyes.
"Do you want to split the tasks?" he finally asked.
"You don't have to," you shrugged your shoulders. "It's my mess."
"Honey, you're already overwhelmed, and all you've done is wake up," he answered, thumb drawing circles on the top of your hand that he still seemed to have clasped within his own. "Let me help."
"It's really gross."
"I've seen mutilated dead bodies."
"I'd argue my kitchen sink is worse."
"Oh would you?" his eyebrows shot up, lips twitching in amusement, that you found solace in, distracting you slightly from your overstimulated mind. "Do you want to have a shower?"
"Yes," you nodded your head, brain ticking over all the personal hygiene tasks you had been neglecting over the past few weeks. 
"How about you go shower, I'll start cleaning up, and you come join me when you're feeling better?"
Despite your aversion to anybody but yourself tackling the mess of your apartment, you knew better than to deny Spencer any further — he had set his mind on helping you. 
Sighing, you nodded your head in defeat. He had coaxed you up off the bed, gotten you to the bathroom, even found you a fresh set of clothes to wear, and waited with you for the water to warm up. It was really only once he was absolutely sure you had gotten into the shower, did he leave you be, and disappeared from the bathroom. 
Eventually, the apartment had been cleaned, with efforts from the both of you getting it to where it now was. 
You were a lot less exhausted, and your brain was a lot less fried now that you didn't have a million tasks catalogued within it to get done. 
You were lying in your freshly made bed — courtesy of Spencer. Your head on his chest, fidgeting with one of his hands as he used the other to wave around as he rambled about something you were no longer following. It had started as a simple explanation for why you had been so overwhelmed in the first place. Which you had asked as a rhetoric, but didn't have the heart to stop him when he began explaining. 
"You're not listening, are you?" he asked, free hand poking your side and emitting an involuntary laugh from you at the feeling. 
"I am, I am! I'm just not following anymore."
"Sorry."
"It's okay," you replied, turning and poking your head up to be level with his. "I like hearing you speak, anyways. Doesn't matter if I don't understand."
He only hummed as a response, and the two of you stared at each other for a beat, before you were breaking out into a smile. 
"Hi," you chirped. 
"Hello," he answered, perhaps a little too amused by your sudden energy. "Would you like something?"
"A kiss?"
"After all that labour I just put in for you?" he mused, but he was already lifting his head to brush his lips against yours, and was most certainly not pulling away when you eagerly connected them properly. 
You pulled back after a few moments, searching his face. "Do you want something for all that labour?"
His hand trailed up your spine, fingertips triggering a shiver to run up your back. "What do you have in mind?"
"I could give you the best head of your life."
He was clearly not expecting that as an offer, perhaps because you never had offered such a thing before. It wasn't even something you had talked about, which was bizarre (in your mind), considering he was quite enthusiastic about using his mouth on you. 
"You don't need to do that," he shook his head, but with how close your faces were, you could see the instant dilation in his pupils. 
"What if I want to?" 
"Then that's very nice of you, but my point still stands," he replied.
"Spencer, let me do something in return," your voice was nothing short of a whine, and if he was any less turned on, maybe it wouldn't have made his firm footed denial falter. Maybe you knew that.
"You could do anything but that."
"So a handjob?"
"Or that."
"You're such an awful liar," you huffed. "I can see your pupils dilating. I know you're turned on by the thought of it."
"It could just be because I'm looking at you," he answered, voice hoarse, no doubt from the arousal he was attempting to deny was there. "Romantic attraction triggers the same response in our hormones."
"But it's not."
He fell silent for a few moments, before he allowed his resolve to slip, shaking his head in agreement with you. "No. It's not."
"See! It's okay if you want it. I'm quite literally offering myself to you," you spouted. 
His eyes fluttered shut, and he exhaled through his nose, words coming out through almost gritted teeth. "That's not a sentence you should be saying."
"Why not?"
His only response was to say your name chidingly, and when he reopened his eyes, he was met with the shit-eating grin on your face. 
"Brat," he mumbled, lips seeking yours once again.
"Who gives really good head," you hummed against his mouth. "And would really love to show you."
"If you're insisting—"
"Which I am," you quickly interjected, staring back at him as yet another amused smile stretched across his lips. Then, he was nodding his head, and you were quite cheerfully kissing him all over again.
It wasn't that you kissed him with much fever at all — in fact, you were melting into his lips with a gentle hum. It was simply that he was kissing you back with a desperation you should be accustomed to. You weren't. 
Every kiss you received from him always felt like he was chipping away at your soul, claiming a piece of it. Maybe he was.
You mewled when his teeth nipped at your lower lip, and he was quick to take the opportunity of slipping his tongue into your mouth. Though, alerted by his sudden control over the situation between you two, you reluctantly pulled your face away from his before it could go much further. 
"Excuse me," he breathed out, scoldingly, only to be met with your hundredth grin of the day as you descended down his body. He'd take it — you smiling, albeit cockily, was much more rewarding than the concerned look you had been sporting for the majority of the afternoon. 
"I don't do this very often," you told him as you lifted your gaze to his, absentmindedly tugging his pants down his legs. 
"I hope not. You've never done it for me, and we've been together for quite a while."
"You know what I mean," you grumbled, and he was forced to poke his tongue into the inside of his cheek to keep the smile off his face. 
"Is this comfortable for you?" he then asked, having noticed your constant adjustments of your positioning between his legs. From nerves or comfortability, he didn't know. 
"Um. I guess so," you replied. "I've never done it lying down."
"We can do it however you prefer to do it, angel."
"Oh. Okay. Cool," you mumbled, sitting up straight and grabbing his hands within your own, tugging him over towards the edge of the bed. 
You sank to your knees on the rug, tapping his knees with your hands to part them so you could situate yourself comfortably between them. 
You were a vision if he'd ever seen one, and you weren't even doing anything. Perhaps you had noticed the effect you had on him, or maybe you were just largely enthusiastic about doing something for him, and only him. 
Your tongue darted out to lick your lips, eyes flickering up to meet his face, and if this was the last sight he saw before he died, he would have no complaints. 
"Have you ever gotten head before?" you mumbled, eyes fixated on him as your hands trailed up the sides of his thighs, resting at the waistband of his boxers. 
"Yes."
"Okay," you whispered, quietly, tapping his hips so he could lift them, and you rolled his boxers down his skin.
"Okay?" he parroted. 
"Okay," you confirmed with a nod of your head. "I just wanted to know if this is going to be completely new for you or not."
As you spoke, your fingertips dragged along his inner thighs, lips following soon after, kissing up the skin. 
"I don't think that's going to matter, honey," he answered, voice breathless. 
You smiled, not needing to ask what he meant. You lifted your head back up, studying his face. He gave you a nod, a silent confirmation to allow you to go further, and you took a beat to compose yourself. It's not like he would be mad at you if it sucked, but you had had a far too awful day to not do something good. 
You hadn't done this in a while, it was true. So your hesitance came more from your brain figuring out what it actually needed to do, than your insecurities (they were there too). 
Insecurities that melted away within an instant, for Spencer's thighs tensed beneath your hands that were now holding them apart the second your lips made contact with his cock, and through your lashes you could see his head tipping back. 
Your cheeks warmed at how easy it was to get him to respond, and you wondered if the satisfaction settled in your chest was anything similar to how he felt when he did this to you. 
You started hesitant. Gentle kitten licks at his tip that probably shouldn't have been garnering such a large reaction from him. But it was, and you had to preoccupy your mouth to keep the smug smile off of it. 
Wrapping your lips around the head, he lets out the breathiest moan you think you've ever heard come from him, and your mind goes hazy. Newfound blind confidence wills you to take more of him in your mouth, and it's a quiet 'Fuck' that compels you even further. 
In hindsight, he knew he'd enjoy it. It was you after all. He knew from the world shattering arousal that the simple sight of you on your knees was. He had, in a few short seconds, mentally prepared to enjoy this.
But not this much, and certainly not this quickly. 
"I've been too selfless," he muttered as you lifted your head back up, tongue licking a stripe up the underside of him as you did. When you met his gaze in question, he added, "I mean never asking you for this. I should've."
You hummed as a response (it was all you really could do), and the gentle vibrations shot heat throughout his body. A shuddering moan rocked through his body, and if not for your quick response time in pushing his hips down, they would've knocked against your face when he bucked them up.
You hollowed your cheeks, lowering your head back down, and emitting the loveliest of moans from Spencer, whose hand found its way to your hair. Upon the lack of your protests, he made a loose ponytail with his fist, gently tugging on it upwards so you could lift your head. 
You flattened your tongue on your ascend, successfully making his already weak grip on your hair go slack, within only seconds of him having grabbed it. Swirling your tongue around the tip of his cock, his hips bucked up again, and you flinched. 
"Jesus—fuck, sorry, honey," he rasped, though his guilt was quick to dissipate as he saw your thumbs up against his thigh. Your movements weren't hesitant, anymore. Just slow. Tortuously slow. "Can I..." he trailed off, seemingly becoming unsure of what it was he was asking of you within seconds, but the retightening of his hand in your hair gave you all you needed to know. 
You nodded your head the best you could, and he mumbled a quiet 'thank you', allowing you to set a base pace, before taking over. 
"So good. Jesus Christ, angel. Where did you learn this? Don't answer that. Don't tell me. Shit." 
His rambling was sharp sentences, that didn't really sound like they belonged together, and certainly didn't sound like they should be coming out of his mouth. They weren't the most articulately structured phrases he's ever come up with. A thought that comforted you, because you were doing that to him. 
"Fuck," he breathed out, once more, and you came to the mental conclusion you've never heard him swear so much in his life. The thought made your stomach flip.
Fingers dug into your scalp, though not too harshly to hurt. In fact, you were letting out a quiet moan of your own at the feeling, hips wiggling. Even in his state, Spencer noticed, and he smiled.
"You—ah—okay, angel?" he asked you, and you relished in the fact that he couldn't get out sentences without moaning. 
Your response was yet another hum, and he was bucking his hips. Again.
You knew he was close for a multitude of reasons; the fact that he had quickened his gentle-turned-firm guidance of your head, his fingers tugging on your hair a little harsher than before, and the ever so lovely, "Jesus Christ—please—oh," leaving his lips, breathlessly.
It was a few more moments of that, before the fingers in your hair went impossibly tight, and the muscles in his thighs locked beneath your hands. 
The fact you had never discussed doing this, meant neither of you knew the other's stance on what to do. Thankfully, Spencer was rendered so frenzied that he couldn't do anything. 
It was a sickeningly lovely sight; you pulling back and swallowing, some of his come painting your bottom lip. His fingers twitched, before they dropped back to the mattress on either side of his body, his chest heaving just as much as your own. 
Lightheaded, you slowly brought yourself back up to your feet, and Spencer's arms were quick to wrap around the backs of your thighs, pulling you into him. 
"Best head of your life?" you asked, lowering your lips to brush against his. 
"By a mile," he replied. 
"Just one mile?" 
"Maybe two."
Shooting him a glare, you huffed, and he laughed. "You're never getting head again, then."
He nipped your lower lip. "Okay."
"I'm putting my foot down," you retorted, disliking his lack of belief in your words. "Never again."
"I believe that."
"You should."
"Oh, I do," he hummed, sarcasm in his words making you frown. "Are your knees okay?" 
If his goal was to distract you, he succeeded, for your eyes were instantly dropping to your knees, indents from the threads of the rug evident. 
"They're okay," you confirmed, squirming as his thumbs rubbed circles into the skin on your thighs. 
"Tell me if they're not," he instructed, and you nodded. He stood up, hands sliding up to your waist. "Shower?"
"Shower," you confirmed with a nod, despite the fact that you had showered only a few hours prior. "Can we watch a movie after?"
"Yes."
your reblogs and replies are always appreciated ♡
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keferon ¡ 1 month ago
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Eh okay so. My brain is absolutely cooked so you will probably just have to ignore the linguistic fuckups
Jazz and Prowl learning to communicate because language barrier is a thing >:D
Previous part
Jazz sometimes thinks that somewhere along his career path he lost the bar separating normal from...well...everything else.
After all he's seen, heard about, and done, he's not sure exactly how to measure what's weird and what's normal. He has..the general idea.
His own. And it's so convoluted and fucked up that he'd rather jump into a volcano than try to explain it to anyone else. Jazz thinks the little colorful aliens around him are weird as hell. He thinks they sound weird, he thinks they look weird, and he thinks he must be going crazy.
And then this big black and white robot catches his eye and Jazz's first thought is not "what the fuck??"
His first thought is
"Thank God! Someone's normal!"
Whoever this guy is, he sounds like he knows what he's doing. And most importantly, he looks just like Jazz. Well, not exactly. But close enough. After all, Jazz knows that his organization wasn't the only mech maker on the entire planet. Other countries were making Mechs too, and Jazz hadn't seen even half of them.
But he can recognize a giant robot when he sees one, okay?
The thought that another mech could be an alien doesn't even enter his mind.
So used to the constant presence of huge piloted robots around him, he looks at this one and clings to its appearance as something familiar and easily explainable. His brain says, we know how this works. There's a robot and inside the robot there's another person. It's the way it's always been. The sky is blue, the grass is green and the robots are human-piloted. It's that simple.
The guy takes him to the far corner of the room and says something. Jazz…doesn't understand..
The mech's face contorts in a surprisingly believable display of concentration. How...who built this robot? How could they make it frown?
He hears something else being said to him but again can't understand a word. Why won't this pilot get out of the mech to talk to him? Jazz doesn't have his communication frequency but surely they could at least shake hands. There must be some reason. Maybe something wrong with the air? Is it dangerous to be outside? This guy should know better, he's been here longer than Jazz, it seems.
(Damn it, whose idea was it to make a mech with a face, it's so distracting)
He rushes to activate the external speakers, because he and this guy obviously speak different languages, but it never hurts to try, right?
"So uh, I don't think you can understand English?"
Mech frowns again, trying to pick up on something familiar in a language that's apparently new to him. But finds nothing. Jazz lowers his horns sadly.
Oh well. Fuck. As if being stuck in an unknown place with unknown creatures wasn't enough, he can't even talk to anyone! How is he supposed to get out of here? Which way should he even go?
The mech waves his hand to get his attention and then pulls out a tablet and a stylus from..where ?
Jazz somehow manages to overlook the fact that the tablet is made to fit the mech's size. His head is still feels a bit…off..after that portal thingie.
"Charades it is then."
____________________
An hour and a half later, Jazz finds himself staring intensely at the screen in front of him with a surprisingly neatly drawn chart on it.
"So uh. Motion."
The other guy nods and starts drawing a walking mech. Then something that looks like a very unusual car. Then a submarine. Jazz gets a little lost looking at how skillful he is with the stylus.
Honestly, he's a good artist!
The guy points to the sketch of a walking mech and says
" Motion."
Then points to the drawing of a car driving and the columns of the chart.
"Motion-rotation" he points to the car again.
That must mean "driving" huh? Jazz nods understandingly.
Mech moves his finger to the submarine.
"Motion-Water."
Ah, it must mean swimming. Jazz nods once more, feeling like a wind-up dummy repeating the same motion a dozen times.
The mech makes a quiet humming noise and then points to the chart
"Motion. Sky."
And then gives Jazz the stylus?
Uh, what is he... Oh, he wants Jazz to figure out what it means.
"Motion" and "sky," right?
Jazz takes the stylus? Pencil? Thingie.. and very carefully draws out a crooked scribble of something only remotely resembling an airplane. The mech arches an eyebrow and looks like he wants to laugh.
Jazz shrugs awkwardly and tries to add windows to the airplane, but ends up making it look more like a severely fucked up caterpillar.
Mech snorts.
Jazz kicks him in the leg.
The airplane begs for a merciful death.
Jazz didn't really expect to get into a language class but he has to admit that whatever language he's learning now is a surprisingly easy one. It only took the other dude half an hour to show him the basic concept and from there it became a game of associations.
There were simple definitions. Like size, quantity, speed, emotion and so on.
There were signs that automatically turned the whole sentence into a question or a statement.
There were modifiers that Jazz defined in his head as positive and negative.
Positive speed - fast.
Positive size - large.
Positive direction - forward.
Positive time - future.
There were also basic words for senses, emotions and whatnot, also with modifiers.
Mouth-positive - to speak
Brain-positive - to think, but negative-brain-do-positive - to learn.
Huh.
And it's so neatly organized that Jazz wondered if this language was designed specifically to be easy to learn.
Let's see....
Mouth - positive, effort - negative.
"Easy to speak."
The guy nods contentedly and starts talking back, while pointing to the appropriate columns of the chart to make it easier for Jazz to understand.
"Creation-positive. Purpose. Person-negative-knowledge. memory-positive-effort-negative."
Jazz frowns, concentrating on his finger.
Oh. Created. For those who don't know it. Easy to learn.
He was right. The whole thing is waaaay too awkward to write poetry but learning it is a delight.
Jazz leans over the chart.
All right, well, let's see.
“Name. You. Question?”
The other guy smiles and pokes at the chart
"Me.Motion-sound-negative.Negative-eyes-positive-someone."
Walk quietly. searching?… Sneaking?
Oh, it's not "to sneak" it's "to prowl"
"Prowl" nods affirmatively. Jazz smiles at him and looks at the chart again. Okay. How to say “music”?..
“word-knowledge-negative.”
He stops to make a gesture with his hands, as if playing an invisible piano while humming a tune.
Prowl nods
“Sound-positive-positive-hearing.”
Jazz chuckles
“A whole two positives eh? Okay then. Uh. You don't look like you listen to jazz....so..”
“Me. Name. Sound-positive-positive-listening.”
Prowl raises his eyebrows. (Jazz is jealous, he wishes he had eyebrows too.)
“You're a musician?"
Jazz quickly shakes his head while simultaneously muting the outside speakers to a barely audible level and turning on one of the songs on his playlist.
Prowl twitches in surprise when he hears the melody.
Jazz waits for the intro to finish playing and then points to himself
“Creation-negative..uh..Sound-positive-positive-hearing. Jazz. This...”
He pats himself lightly on the chest.
"..is me. Jazz."
Prowl straightens up slightly
“Oh, you're not a musician, you're the music.”
Jazz nods cheerfully
“Yes yes!”
“Jaaz?”
“No no. Jazz.”
“Ah. Jazz?”
“That's right.”
Prowl draws a portal on the screen.
“You teleported here. What happened?”
Jazz hangs back, trying to construct an answer in his head. Good thing Prowl seems to have infinite patience
“So, I uh. What was 'fight'? Movement-pain-positive? I fought these things...”
He takes the tablet from Prowl and draws a crooked blot with a bunch of tentacles on it. Then thinks for a bit and adds big teeth and a lot of eyes. He's not really sure how to draw those eyes properly, so he just scatters them randomly around the monster area.
Prowl doesn't seem to be that amused by Jazz's drawings anymore, in fact, he suddenly becomes very somber.
“Quintessons.”
He pokes at the monster
“Name-Quintessons. Number-question.”
How many?
Jazz scratches the back of his head
“So uh...a lot?....number-positive-positive-positive-positive-positi...you get the idea.”
To be convincing, he dramatically spreads his arms out to the sides depicting something very large.
Prowl looks alarmed.
And unconvinced.
“How did you survive?”
Jazz laughs pretentiously
“Ask them how they survived.”
Prowl makes the “you can't be serious” face. Jazz isn't quite sure what exactly is confusing him. Mechs are designed to kill Quintessons, aren't they? Judging by his movements, this pilot must be damn good at controlling his mech, and that kind of guys usually fight on the front lines.
He decides to put that thought aside for later. There are more important things right now, like...oh shit, where is he even going??
Jazz leans over the chart again
“Uh. Right. Question-we-move-up-place” Man, how to specify... “Knowledge-negative?”
Prowl, linguistic gods bless him, understands him and starts gesturing over the chart in response
Okay. Ah. I-move-up. Planet-creation-positive.
'I'm heading home' or 'my home planet'.”
Jazz instantly perks up.
“Oh that's great, I'm pretty sure I'm supposed to go there too.”
Prowl is speaking in a language he's unfamiliar with, so he's definitely from another country, but hey, who cares as long as it's on Earth, right? He just needs to get there and he'll find his own way from there.
He watches the space debris flicker by outside the window. Even the stars are unfamiliar, Jazz can't find any constellations he knows.
One of the little purple creatures says something and Prowl steps aside to chat with them. Jazz leans back and settles into a more or less stable position. Then does the same thing, but with his real, human body. Hell, his head still feels really fucking weird after that teleportation.
He opens the comm channel and just listens to the static for a couple minutes in the faint hope that the engineering department will find a way to contact him.
Nothing.
He sighs.
“1061 on the com. In case there's any way you can hear me...ah shit. You guys won't believe what happened...”
___________
[Next]
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simmerandwrite ¡ 4 months ago
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electric touch (part 1)
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Pairing: Bucky x medical team! reader
Summary: Getting a spot on the field medical team was your dream. And your closest work friend Bucky Barnes finally asking you out? That was the cherry on top of your good news. Now all you had to do was pass your training week. Seems easy enough until you’re faced with someone who doesn’t want to see you win.
Warnings: abuse of power, verbal abuse, physical assault, some PTSD (but none of these are because of Bucky!!!!)
Wordcount: 7k
Part 2
Notes: hello! Are you hungry for a lil slice of ‘who did this to you’ pie with a big dollop of protective Bucky Barnes on top? Dig in!! I aim to be as nondescript as possible for the reader but I will note reader is shorter than Bucky and wears glasses. Thank you for reading and I'd love to hear your thoughts! please consider reblogging, it helps my work reach more lovely people here on Tumblr. <3 merci!
---
Your regular lunch dates with Bucky started unintentionally. In fact, your friendship with Bucky had started that way – very unintentionally.
In retrospect, you couldn’t believe you had been late on your first day. You had intentionally set extra alarms to make sure you got to Stark Industries early.But you couldn’t control the inconsistencies of the New York subway system. When you skirted into the training room, only one seat was left – beside Bucky Barnes himself.
It was funny to think that the mandatory onboarding applied to new Avengers, too.
Of course, you knew who he was – the former Winter Soldier – but you didn’t realize he had to sit through the boring health and safety discussions and HR seminars like everyone else. When the first lunch break arrived, you turned to him and asked if he wanted to join you for lunch at the burger place down the street.
Initially, it looked like he was fighting off the urge to decline, but then he said: “Sure.”
Your conversations were very stilted in the beginning, which you didn’t mind. But as the week carried on, you felt the foundations of a friendship.
(He told you, later, that he appreciated your kindness that first day. That he had been really fucking scared to sit in that room with strangers judging him. He liked that you treated him like a normal person.)
It had grown organically since then – but you were simply just work friends. Your roles at Stark Industries slash The Avengers Initiative didn’t always overlap, but you did occasionally see him in the halls or if he happened to be by medical when you were working. Then, one day, you saw him eating alone in the cafeteria and you dropped down across from him to catch up.
Then lunch turned into a routine for you both. Typically on Wednesdays you’d sit together, if Bucky wasn’t on a mission or you weren’t on the night rotation. Sometimes Sam or Steve or some of the other nurses joined you, but secretly, you liked when it was just you and Bucky. Sometimes it felt like he preferred it that way too.
“So, guess what?” You sat down on the chair across from him, your tray knocking against his. He slowly moved his eyes from the pages of his book – he almost always had his nose in a book at lunch, regardless of the company – and matched your smile.
“I take it you got good news?”
You searched his face then frowned. “Wait, do you already know? That’s not fair.”
“Sam showed me the roster.”
A groan rumbled from your chest. “Boo.” You tipped your head to look at him as you paused. “Can you just pretend you’re about to hear this for the first time?”
Bucky smirked, putting down his book and politely stacking his hands to give you his full attention. “Sure. Start again?”
“Guess what?” You repeated, rolling your eyes.
“I’ve got no clue, doll. What?”
“You are looking at the newest member of the field medical team!” The chair legs squeaked as you danced in celebration.
“Congratulations,” Bucky replied, a wide smile crossing his face. He reached out and offered his fist, which you met with your own. You knocked your knuckles into his twice then wiggled your fingers at one another - a silly secret handshake you had invented together over a Taco Tuesday lunch one day, mostly out of annoyance to Sam.
You deflated afterwards, though, as reality set in. “Hopefully I can make it through training next week. It’s going to be hard but.. I can do hard things.”
Bucky reached over and grabbed your hand, holding it for a moment though he quickly pulled back. “You’re going to do great. You wouldn’t have been picked if you weren’t capable. You’re more than ready and, well, uh, I’m proud of you.”
You smiled, glancing down to where his hand had briefly made contact with yours. It felt.. hot, for some reason. You resisted touching the skin there. This had been happening more than you wanted to admit recently – a new spark when you saw him, when you touched. You thought you had easily avoided the possibilities of a developing crush on Bucky but.. something had been brewing for you. And maybe the same was happening with him, too - when you thought about how he looked at you, how considerate he was…
You wouldn’t know with any certainty unless you asked and you were way, way too scared to ask. Ruining your friendship may not be worth it. Especially if you were joining the medical team that would accompany the Avengers on some of their missions. What if you made it weird? What if you went on one date and it was terrible and your friendship never recovered? What if you asked Bucky out and then he laughed in your face and –
“We should go out and celebrate,” he cut you off. 
Wait. Was his voice shaking?
You met his eyes. Was he nervous? “I still.. I have to pass the training.”
“I know,” he nodded. “And tomorrow I leave for.. an undisclosed location for the week. So. When I get back and you’ve crushed the training and have the new job title, let’s go out.”
“Just you and me?” You asked, swallowing hard.
Bucky took a deep breath. “Yeah. If you..”
“Like a date?”
He closed his eyes, face scrunched up. It was cute. “Yeah, like a date, sweetheart. Just you and me.”
Okay, well, okay. Yes. Okay, that answered your question. You supposed the risk was being taken either way. There. He did the thing before you could even talk yourself out of it.
You smiled, nervously adjusting your glasses. Oh my god. You hadn’t even answered. With eyes wide, you reached for him. “Yes, that sounds.. that sounds wonderful. I’d love that.”
He grinned, squeezing your hand. “For a second there, I really thought I screwed all this up.”
---
Bucky couldn’t believe it had taken him this long to finally just do it. Asking you out had been at the top of his list for a long time and although it scared the shit out of him, this follow-up feeling of anticipation had been totally worth it. Now he just needed to get through a grueling mission with a sweet reward at the end – a date with you.
You- the first stranger who treated him like a regular person. You - who cared so deeply about your job. You - who seemed to always hear his snarky comments and always laughed, giggled, snorted, at them. With a smile that could make his entire body warm up. 
You. He couldn’t wait for that damn date. 
A date was the scary next step. But he was tired of waiting and tired of denying his feelings. And thank god you had reacted just as positively. The foundation of your friendship was so important to him but he had a feeling things could be even better. He prayed he wouldn’t fuck it all up.
When he showed up at the compound early in the morning to get on the jet, Bucky was surprised to see Sam prepping in the pilot’s seat.
Sam jumped in with an answer before the question even left Bucky’s lips. “Natasha had to join Clint on the Belize mission, last minute. So it’s you and me, pal.”
Bucky rolled his eyes. Though he wasn’t mentally prepared for a week with Sam, he could handle it. Bucky was certain he could handle anything that he faced this week, knowing it was your face on his mind keeping him going.
As you crossed his mind again, another thought surfaced.
“If you’re here, who’s taking over the training for the med field team?” Bucky reached for his phone then cursed. They were going dark for this mission so he’d left his phone in his locker. Although he had sent you a message after he got up that morning, he wanted to reach out one last time and send some extra reassurance your way. 
“Don’t worry,” Sam knocked his shoulder, standing up to do a final check of the gear. “Your girl is in good hands.” Sam added in a wiggle of his fingers in Bucky's direction.
You weren’t Bucky’s girl.. yet. He didn’t feel bothered by the term. In fact, he loved it and so badly wanted you to be okay with him saying it some day too. Though it was still worth correcting Sam. It didn’t seem fair to put a label on something without consulting you first. Not to mention Sam’s teasing about you and Bucky had been going on for months and Bucky did not want to indulge him.
“She’s not mine,” Bucky replied, scrubbing a hand down his jaw.
Sam carried on. “Boone is doing the training protocol instead, but I’ll manage the final evaluations next week.” 
A quiet groan escaped Bucky’s lips. “Boone is a jackass.”
“I don’t disagree that he can be a bit too self assured - but he has proved himself in the field and will be a great mentor to this cohort.”
“Wasn’t he one of the agents Steve benched a few months ago - after his annual physical? What’s the term they used - he was doping?”
Sam sighed. “He was clean but a couple of his buddies were thrown out. But Boone is good, Buck. She’s gonna be fine.” With a final glance at the screen between them, Sam clapped his hands. “Let’s get this over with, shall we?”
---
When you applied for the job at Stark Industries for their medical team, you weren’t entirely sure what the role was going to entail. Your years of working as a nurse at the busiest emergency room in Chicago had given you plenty of experience with, well, everything and anything imaginable. You were always prepared for the unexpected.
What you hadn’t expected though was the pace - it was significantly slower than you imagined. Most of your days revolved around small visits from agents for anything from minor injuries and lacerations to annual physicals. On occasion you’d support when the Avengers came in, but usually they worked directly with Dr. Cho or the other on site doctors.
You figured the cure for your unrelenting desire for more was to get on the field medical team - a group of agents and trained nurses who accompanied the Avengers or other strike teams on missions, acting as a resource for any injuries to civilians and team members alike. Not every mission needed a team and sometimes it would involve last minute travel, but you didn’t mind.
When your application for transfer was finally accepted, you couldn’t get over how excited you were. You had been working hard for months getting into better shape, especially your stamina. Sure, maybe you could do a bit more when it came to targeted strength training but you had qualified on the initial testing to even get into the training level, so you’d be fine.
You could do this.
Truthfully, you were really excited about it. And Bucky had sent you the most encouraging message before he left that morning and you just.. You knew you could do this.
Bucky's words echoed: “...you wouldn’t have been picked if you weren’t capable. You’re more than ready and, well, uh, I’m proud of you.”
You were going to do this well and you were going to make yourself proud, too.
Most of your excitement depleted when you walked into the gym though. You joined the rest of the agents in the training group and braced yourself when you saw Agent Nathan Boone standing with his tablet, calling out names for attendance. 
“Wilson had to suit up as Falcon and jump on a critical mission this morning so I’ll be running the training program this week,” he explained as he sized up his group, which included you plus another half a dozen training agents. 
Without a doubt, Boone was the worst replacement for Sam you could think of. Boone exuded a confidence you couldn’t quite wrap your mind around, given his frat guy personality. Hiding behind his smarmy grin, linebacker build and perfectly coiffed hair - he was a real jackass. 
You tried not to let your mind race as Boone walked you all through the upcoming week of training. You’d be going over everything from basic self defense skills to hand to hand combat strategies to overall endurance drills. Then he explained that next week it was Sam Wilson who’d be doing the final evaluations.
“So let’s prove to him you’re all a good batch, okay?” Boone’s demeanor shifted as he got into his coaching mode. “Let’s start with a warm up run. Onto the treadmills.”
This wasn’t your first interaction with Boone, though you weren’t sure he would remember you. 
During your first few weeks you’d been responsible for doing the annual physicals for most of the agents. It had been a very repetitive (and boring) assignment, until some anomalies came up in the test results. A few agents, including Boone, had weird things flagged on their blood and urine tests - mostly markers that indicated steroid use. Which was completely against standards for agents and employees at Stark Industries. 
One of them, some bulky aggressive asshole, tried to convince you to look the other way but you had ultimately reported it. The fallout caused a huge uproar between the medical team and the agents, with the consequence coming down on a handful of agents who were fired due to drug use. Boone had escaped that fate somehow, passing his re-test with perfect results. And even though HR promised you it was a sealed case, you were always worried it had left a bit of a target on your back.
Nothing had come from it. The next round of physicals you assisted with didn’t involve any of those field agents and no other concerns had been flagged. Everything seemed back to normal.
In fact, you had seen Boone once since that whole controversy. A few months ago you passed him flirting with one of the admins in your department but you kept your head down and ignored him. That was it.
Hopefully the week of training wouldn’t be soured by your history with him but you figured it was safest to go in with an open mind. 
Thankfully, by the end of your run, as you were moving onto some basic tactical drills, he continued treating you just like everyone else. Generally firm and distant overall, but nothing strangely out of the ordinary. His barked orders were delivered to everyone evenly. If he had any recollection of your connected history, he didn’t bring it up.
The first day of training had been tough, especially since you still had a few extra hours of work to log afterwards. When you returned to your reporting station in the medical wing, you had to really settle your mind down and talk your way through the unkind thoughts racing around your brain.
You could do this. 
The second day focused exclusively on muscular endurance, which wasn’t really your strong suit but you managed to keep up with the group all the same.
Boone had the entire cohort going hard - with a lot of tough but constructive encouragement coming from him along the way. When one of the other trainees dropped their barbells, it seemed to irritate Boone immensely too. He let out a few curses as he helped them pick the weights back up then apologized for his reaction but the flare of anger was evident. 
When you were all heading back to the locker rooms, it was one of the other agents muttering about ‘roid rage’ that raised a red flag for you. 
It was during the third day of training that you felt the first tug of resistance with Boone. It was small things that you couldn’t help but file away. The way he delivered supportive commentary to everyone else in the group but only gave you critical feedback. During one of the practical scenarios, he undermined all your answers.
“I see why you’d think that way if you’ve never done this before but I can tell you by experience, it wouldn’t work. Bit of an amateur way of looking at things, actually. You need to do better if you’re going to be in the field with experts. Are you sure you passed the interview for this role?”
He said things in a way that didn’t always seem personal to you, but he certainly delivered them in a condescending tone. 
But, maybe, well, maybe you were just reading into things. You were feeling tired already and not really sleeping, so your focus was a bit off. 
Yeah, you could do better, strategize better, think things through in a better way.
On the fourth day, after a morning of weapons training and spending time at the range, the session moved onto sparring drills. It was quite basic - Boone walked the group through easy to follow hand to hand techniques, spending time here and there with each person to adjust their form. 
Everyone who qualified for the med team had to pass certain physical testing standards already. You had been working hard in the gym for months to get your mind ready, though you knew you weren’t very experienced in anything related to defensive techniques.
When he got to you following one of the scenarios, there was a firm frown on his face. “You need to be less in your head.”
You nodded, flexing and stretching your hands out. “Okay. Uhm okay, well, do you have any tips on how to–”
He was quick to cut you off. “Figure it out. I don’t have time to teach you critical thinking skills.” Following a sharp finger snap, he pointed directly at you. “And what’s with the glasses?”
“Ran out of contacts this morning, but I can do without them if I need to. Its–”
“They’re a safety risk.”
He didn’t care for your explanation or offer you any other advice, instead just muttering something as he moved on and tapping something into the tablet. None of his feedback had been helpful. Christ, you figured maybe it was worth starting a list to consult with Sam about following your evaluation instead. 
You just had to get through one more day with Boone. You were tired - down to your bones, from the physical and mental work during this week.
But it was nearly the weekend and that meant next week was approaching. Most importantly, the training would be done and you would have a real date with Bucky on the books, too. You couldn’t wait.
---
The last training day was mostly a culmination of everything you had gone over from the week. There was more endurance testing, some strength and performance work and the day ended with more sparring and situationals. 
You knew this was the light at the end of the tunnel. And when everything was wrapping up, you were relieved to finally be done with taking instructions from Boone, too.
Until his final speech. “You’ve been a great group and I would say most of you are ready for next week. Wilson will be impressed.” After a few more notes and instructions for the following week, he dismissed everyone. As you headed back towards the locker room, he called your name.
That made your stomach drop. He waved you back over towards the mats.
“I just wanted to give you a heads up,” Boone started slowly, eyes glancing around the empty room before he looked down at his tablet screen. “Here is the report on your training this week.” He turned the device so you could read over it.
After the first line, you took it from his hands. “Wait - what?”
“I just don’t think you’re ready.” Boone crossed his arms. “You’ve got the medical knowledge, sure. But the rest of it, even if you had another two months to train, I’m doubtful.” He took the tablet back and continued scrolling, as if he hadn’t just delivered such a disappointing blow to you. “It’s up to you whether you still want to do your test with Sam next week, but if I was in your shoes, I’d tap out.”
You swallowed hard, head tipped slightly to the side as you took in what he was saying. “That doesn’t make any sense. I kept up with everyone here this week.”
“This is a controlled environment; I don’t think you can hack it in the field.” Boone shrugged. “Like I said, you’re more than welcome to do your evaluation but I don’t think this will impress The Falcon enough to solidify your spot on the field team.”
“Good thing you’re not in charge of this decision then,” you bit in return, taking a step back. It felt like he was egging you on and you didn’t like it. Even worse that you were alone with him in the gym. “I don’t have to prove shit to you.”
“You don’t have to, or you simply can’t?” He countered, tossing the tablet to the side as he crossed his arms. He sized you up, eyes drawing up the shape of your body. “Let’s try something.” He motioned to the mats. “I’ll give you another chance to change my mind about that report. Maybe I misread your abilities and intentions.”
You knew the right thing to do would be to walk away and ignore how he was antagonizing you. But a tiny voice in the back of your head kept reminding you that you were good, that you had earned your place here. That you needed to show him that. 
No, you didn’t.
Yes, you did.
You took a deep breath and stepped forward, placing yourself in the middle of the mat. “Fine. Let’s do it.”
Boone laughed, standing in front of you. He scanned you over again. “Scenario. You’re in the field, there’s a civilian who needs medical attention. You’re alone with them as everyone else explores the area for threats. But, it's night time, it was a busy bit of action and –” Boone reached over and pulled your glasses off. “And you lost your glasses in the chaos.”
Before you could protest about the logistics of this stupid scenario, he threw them to the side.
You shook your head and immediately stepped back. “What the fuck?”
“Maybe you should have worn your contacts today.” He replied and this time, there was something more at the edge of his words. Something unsettling.
This was a bad idea. But he was waiting for you to reply, to call his bluff and tap out. You growled to yourself and stayed.
“The civilian has a broken limb so you’re on the ground beside them.” Without even hesitating he placed both his hands on your shoulders and shoved you down to your knees.
None of this made any lick of sense. This wasn’t a scenario you’d end up in. You wouldn’t be alone or you’d call for backup.
He continued without a second thought, moving to stand behind you, placing his hand on the crown of your head. “And someone comes at you from behind – now you’re compromised and so is your civilian.”
You sat there on your knees, chock still. A red flashing light was going off in your mind but for some reason, you stayed.
A low, grumbly laugh escaped him. “See? Not only are you a terrible nurse but you have no fucking instinct—”
You immediately swung your leg up to hook behind him, not sending him down to the ground but gaining enough of your own momentum to plot out your next move. Planting a foot, you lunged forward and grabbed his waist, pulling him towards the mat.
That really set off whatever anger had been simmering in him. The next thing you saw was the training mat as your face and torso were being shoved against it. 
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Your shouting felt useless as your body writhed under his weight. Your cheek dragged across the plastic mat as you moved, burning against your skin. “Get off of me, you—”
“Defend. Yourself.” Boone barked back, adjusting to grab your arm. He gripped your elbow, then twisted your wrist behind your back. A jolt of pain rushed down your shoulder. “Took me a few days but then I remembered your face.”
You cried out, squeezing your eyes shut. “Please just stop. What is—why are you—”
“Three of my friends, my brothers – you ruined their lives, you know that? They lost all their job prospects, they have fuck all left because of what you did. You know, we need that stuff - to keep up with supersoldiers. There is nothing fucking wrong with some pharmaceutical help. If I’m backing up Captain America, I deserve the boost.” With his knee pressing against your back, he leveraged himself to sit up a bit straighter. But his grip on your wrist remained, growing tighter and tighter. “If you had just turned the other way and ignored those tests—”
“I was doing my job,” you mumbled back at him. “They were the ones who broke the rules and—”
His voice hadn’t quite grown to shouting but the intensity grew. “And you are the one who suffers now, alright? And you sure as hell aren’t joining the field team. I’m going to make sure of it.”
---
All Bucky wanted to do when they got back to the compound was text you. It was late Sunday night but he didn’t care.
After the grueling week he and Sam had, Bucky took comfort in knowing soon enough he’d get to see you. He wanted to know about everything from last week - from training to everyday life, he just wanted to talk to you. Crossing the threshold from friends to something more was scary but during his long, sleepless nights, you provided a strange sense of comfort to him.
Without doing a dang thing. Just knowing you made him better, inspired him to be better and to be present. 
“Hey,” Sam tugged on Bucky’s arm before he headed to the locker room. “Medical check first. Then you’re free to send your little smiley face emojis to her.”
Bucky grumbled but didn’t have the energy to argue with Sam. The mission had gone well but hadn’t been the smoothest for either of them. While they both returned unharmed, Bucky knew coming down from these sorts of weeks properly was important.
Finally, after a clearance from the nurse and a quick shower - Bucky was turning his phone back on.
He dismissed all the messages from Steve and an Avengers group chat he liked to ignore then finally found his way to his conversation with you. Seeing a slew of your thoughts over the course of the week made him smile.
You: good luck this week - come back in one piece, please <3 
You: made it through day one and two, turns out my five-story walkup apartment is good for my cardio skills after all lol You: remind me of that next time I complain about the stairs
You: day three has proved that I do need to work on my upper body strength You: wanna be my personal trainer? ;)
You: miss you, hope everything is going safely You: this week has really kicked my ass
Your messages did peter off by Friday and although Bucky longed for more, he assumed you were probably just tired after the long week. Plus, the training wasn’t for the light of heart. Sam had shown him the schedule and although it was standard, its intensity was intentional. Not that Bucky doubted you - he knew you’d been preparing as best as you could since you had shown an interest in joining the field team months ago. But that could really exhaust someone by the end of it.
And tomorrow you had to power through a final evaluation with Sam too, so Bucky hoped you got to spend the rest of the weekend resting.
He dropped down onto one of the benches and planned his response.
Bucky: hey doll, made it back safe and sound Bucky: in one piece, I promise :) Bucky: can’t wait to hear about last week, I’m sure you did great Bucky: good luck tomorrow, I’ll come find you after the eval Bucky: sweet dreams 
---
Bucky felt a little bit silly, lingering outside the training gym. At least he wasn’t pacing, that would have been an even worse look. He leaned against the opposite wall to the doors, arms crossed.
Something just felt a bit off for him and, well, finally seeing you would help ease his mind. It was just strange – the lack of communication. Sure, he had sent his message quite late the night before but he assumed he might hear something back from you during the day.
But no, it had been radio silence. He could attribute it to your needing to prepare for your evaluation but that didn’t seem like enough of a justification. In all the times you and he had been friends, you always managed to send a reply.
He would just have to settle for an in person update, following your testing with Sam. Five other agents exited the gym by mid afternoon, but you never showed up at the door. 
Sam did eventually emerge, tapping quickly against his tablet. He came to a halt when he spotted Bucky waiting, arms now tightly locked behind his back.
Bucky looked over Sam’s shoulder, trying to glimpse into the gym before he met his eyes. “How’d she do?”
Sam let out an awkward laugh. “Well, she didn’t show. She sent me an email earlier saying that she was sick.”
Bucky’s brow furrowed slightly. “Oh.” 
“I know, weird. What’s even more weird though is that when I said we could reschedule her for another date, she tapped out.” Sam raised his shoulder to shrug then showed Bucky the screen.
Bucky scanned over the message and frowned. It was true. Your reply to Sam was short, explaining you didn’t want to reschedule and declined any further interest in the field team. That was it. You were out.
“Given how she sent me a five-paragraph essay explaining how excited she was to join the team, this seems out of character.” Sam tucked the screen under his arm and patted Bucky on the shoulder. “Give me an update after you talk to her.”
“What makes you think—”
“Oh, I already see your wheels turning. You’re doing the math on how quickly you can get to her place.” Sam called after him as Bucky turned to leave. “Let her know I can reschedule her anytime!”
---
You knew you couldn’t ignore Bucky forever. It was just.. it felt like too much, thinking of a way to reply. After what happened with Boone on Friday, every single thing in your life felt like climbing the steepest mountain.
It was absurd how quickly things had escalated. You should have just walked away the instant Boone brought up your evaluation. Getting on that mat with him was really fucking stupid and.. here you were.
You could barely remember how you got home Friday – dazed and confused and numb. After Boone finished screaming and you had stopped trying to fight back, you curled up on yourself. You fought back tears over the humiliation and pain, hands shaking as you grabbed your things from the locker room. One ridiculously overpriced cab ride later and you made it home to your studio in Astoria.
Then you cried in the shower and all the way to your bed - where you stayed as long as you possibly could on Saturday, dousing yourself in painkillers just to try and stay asleep.
You knew you needed to go to urgent care, or even just an emergency room - somewhere you could afford the x-ray. You had never broken a bone before but you had seen plenty of hand fractures during your time working in triage. You couldn’t make a fist, your hand was bruising up towards your wrist and the pain was excruciating. The image of Boone stomping on your hand and wrist as you tried to crawl away was imprinted in your mind…
You were stuck on the climb though. The mental battle of trying to figure out the best lie to tell the admitting nurses anywhere was daunting. Christ, how would you explain this?
You had to - you had to tell someone. The way Boone had flown off the handle, how he attacked you verbally and physically, he couldn’t get away with it. You knew the right thing to do but… fuck if you weren’t scared. He had made it pretty clear he’d be keeping an eye on you. And there was no way you’d be able to do your test with Sam now.
If you reported him, you’d probably have to get HR and the police involved and what if he denied everything and—
You ended up in a helpless loop every single time.
Saturday came and went. You only left your apartment to visit the nearest drugstore for a new compression bandage and more pain medication. Sunday passed by just the same. You skipped your normal spin class and barely spent time outside of your bed. 
The pain in your hand was growing worse and worse. You had to use your left hand to send Sam and your manager messages - because even just moving your right hand made your stomach swirl. And the guilt about not responding to Bucky was growing bigger and bigger too. 
How could you explain it? Boone had pressed your buttons and you pushed back and look what happened. How could Bucky be proud of you now?
Your phone had buzzed mid afternoon, just after you were supposed to be doing your session with Sam.
It was Bucky - worried and asking if you needed anything for whatever illness was plaguing you. 
You ignored it.
When he called, you ignored that too.
You were balled up on the end of your couch, eyes glazed over as another episode of your favourite show loaded up on Netflix. You knew you needed to eat something, that the pain medication on an empty stomach was a recipe for disaster. But… you couldn’t get up. Laying perfectly still with a bag of frozen vegetables on your hand was the closest thing to relief you had.
Then, someone was knocking at your door. The noise made you gasp, though you couldn’t move. You could ignore the noise along with everything else. It was probably just your downstairs neighbour back to complain about your TV again and –
Whoever was at the door knocked again, this time calling out your name. 
You recognized the voice.
Bucky.
He called your name out again. “Listen, I don’t care if you’re sick. I just want to make sure you’re alright. I grabbed some soup from that place I was telling you about.”
You sucked in a deep breath and pulled yourself up off the couch. You really, really wanted to see him - just the idea of his smile made everything feel a bit better. But then you couldn’t hide anymore and… hiding felt safe.
“I’m okay,” you finally replied as you got approached. “Feeling better but I might be contagious, Buck.”
You sensed some relief from him as his feet shuffled on the other side of the door. “Sweetheart, I.. I can’t even get sick, okay? I just need to see you.”
“My apartment is a mess.”
“I don’t care.”
You swallowed the lump in your throat. “Bucky, I’m.. I’m not at my best right now.”
“I don’t care.” He said your name once more. “Please.”
You pulled up the hood of your sweatshirt then reluctantly reached for the door knob.
---
When you finally opened the door, Bucky was relieved. But when you immediately turned away to return to your couch without a word, his relief felt misplaced. Something was wrong. Your sudden weekend illness and dropping out of the new job training weren’t adding up to anything that felt good.
He was worried.
Bucky had never been inside your apartment before. There were a handful of occasions after work or some happy hour thing when he dropped you off but this was new. He liked the idea of seeing your home but he wished it had been different circumstances. 
Home was a little studio, with a compact kitchen ahead of him across from the door. Beside it was a cozy living room area separated from the bed and windows, divided by a short bookcase. It was so very you and Bucky wanted nothing more than to just be there with you, scan over the books you like and curl up together on the couch.
But it wasn’t the time to daydream. Instead, he stepped into the kitchen to deposit the takeout bag, retrieving the soup before moving to where you were curling back up in your blankets. 
“How are you feeling?” He took another step closer but stopped when you leaned away from his approach. He took a seat opposite you and extended the container in your direction. 
“Yeah, I’m.. okay,” you replied with a shrug. “Thanks for the soup.” You took it from him, reaching across yourself awkwardly with a shaking hand, and rested it on your lap. 
He took the moment of silence to get a better look at you. Behind your glasses, your eyes were swollen, as if you had been crying. Bucky watched you carefully maneuver the spoon and it wasn’t lost on him you were favouring your left hand. In fact, your right arm was barely moving. 
“Do you need anything else? I could run to the pharmacy..” He trailed off as his eyes shifted to your coffee table, which was littered with an array of pill bottles. Mostly painkillers and what looked like a melting bag of frozen peas. And tucked under the table was… a half empty bottle of wine. Not exactly the type of self medication for a stomach bug or the common cold.
You closed your eyes, taking another taste of the soup before gently moving it to the table. “I think the worst of it has passed. Just.. tired now, I guess. I’ll be back at work tomorrow.” You smiled, just barely, then it disappeared as your eyes shut.
Bucky considered that the perfect opportunity to change the subject. Your name left his lips. It was quiet. You peaked one eye open to look at him.
“What happened last week?” he asked.
You laughed, though it came out quite empty. “Just five very intense, rigorous training days. I wasn’t great but.. I managed, I guess.” 
Bucky cut to the chase, though he couldn’t predict your reaction. “So how come you’re not doing the final evaluation?” 
A long sigh escaped you, rolling your eyes before leaning back again. You stared at the ceiling. “Should I just start adding you to all my correspondence with Sam?”
“Don’t be mad at Sam,” Bucky replied. “I asked him and he only told me because he was worried.”
You laughed again, with more of your body. The same emptiness remained and this time it seemed to cause you pain. You winced, swallowing an uncomfortable look on your face as you turned to peer at him. “I’m not mad at Sam. I’m mad at..” You shook your head. “At myself, I guess.”
“Why?”
“It doesn’t matter, alright? It’s over and I missed today and–”
“Sam offered to resch–”
“Bucky, it doesn’t matter!” You snapped this time, cutting him off. 
Bucky shook his head. Something else was going on. He had never seen you like this before - despondent and… broken. Sure, your friendship had rarely escaped the walls of work but the foundation between you both was solid. He had seen your ups and downs, and you had seen his too - recalling bad dates and ranting about missions and laughing over lunch and all of it. 
He knew you. The person sitting across from him, it wasn’t you. 
“Sweetheart, please tell me what’s going on.” 
Your eyes were closed again, head shaking. “Nothing is..” Your lip trembled. “Maybe you should just go..”
Bucky stood from the couch, but he didn’t move to the door. Instead, he crouched right in front of you. “If that’s what you really want, I’ll go, okay? I’d never stay if you didn’t want me here. But you opened that door for me. You could have already sent me away, soup in hand. I’m here right now because I care about you.” He said your name again, like a plea for you to look at him. “I can help, okay? Whatever is going on, I can help. Let me help, please.”
Your breath picked up, intertwined with winces of pain as you adjusted on the couch. You crossed your legs then moved your arms carefully, using your left hand to tear away your sweatshirt. Finally, you opened your eyes and extended your right arm to Bucky.
Despite being wrapped in a compression bandage, the swelling was evident on your fingers. Bruises littered your hand too and continued upwards to your t-shirt line. 
Bucky dropped to his knees, looking from your face down towards your arm. He whispered out your name, desperately trying not to fill in the blanks without getting more information from you. “What happened?”
You simply shook your head, swallowing whatever response was trying to escape. 
“Can I–” He motioned to your hand, cautiously reaching for it. You didn’t move, allowing him to unwrap the bandaging. You winced at the touch and change in pressure, eyes clamping shut again as you breathed deeply. 
Bucky skated his fingers along the side of your forearm, down towards your wrist and hand. Light shades of purple and blue decorated your skin but the swelling was what concerned Bucky the most. 
“I’m worried something is broken.” You finally said quietly, letting out another groan of pain as Bucky flipped your hand over to assess the underside. 
He wanted to reply with ‘yeah, no shit’ but figured that wouldn’t be helpful. If you hadn’t sought out medical attention by now, there was probably a good reason. You were smart, a nurse who could easily figure out her own symptoms. But something was stopping you. Embarrassment, guilt.. Maybe fear? 
Bucky was gentle as he held your hand. Christ, his mind was racing. “What happened? Did you fall? Did something go wrong last week?”
You shook your head.
Although there was one giant fucking obvious glaring answer to his next question, Bucky wanted to hear your response. Maybe you had fallen or dropped something on it this weekend. Maybe you had crushed it between a door or something, anything else than someone hurting you. Because the thought of anyone doing that, inflicting any intentional harm –
Bucky sucked in a breath and looked back at you. Your lower lip was already trembling again. He had to ask. He didn’t want to, but he fucking had to.
“Sweetheart, who did this to you?”
“I should have walked away, Bucky. I..” You immediately trailed off, head shaking again as you tried to collect yourself. 
With you, Bucky would be patient. He would always be patient. A few moments ticked by as he waited, still holding your injured hand in his. 
“It was supposed to just be a routine scenario, a test sort of thing I guess. But he was… he was volcanic. The anger erupted and he - he.. Bucky, I was just doing my job, it’s not my fault his friends lost theirs an-and he got so mad. I tried to get away but he just kept going.”
He said your name quietly. “Take a deep breath for me, okay?” You did, breathing in tandem with him a few times as you steadied yourself. “You’ve gotta tell me a name, please.”
After another deep breath, you nodded. “It was Boone.” You closed your eyes. “I think he’s taking drugs, steroids–again and he just.. I shouldn’t have engaged him at all. And I tried to get away once I realized he was freaking out..”
Bucky stilled, lips pulled into a straight line. “Hey, look at me.” He waited for you to meet his gaze. “This isn’t your fault.” God, he wanted to say so much more but the simmering anger below the surface was bubbling up. And that wasn’t important. You needed an x-ray and real medical attention. Then, maybe he could face the rage coursing through his bones. “Sweetheart, we’ve gotta get this looked at, okay?”
Reluctantly, your head shook. “I know. I just.. I don’t want to have to go to urgent care and explain what happened. I should have already gone and I feel so stupid about the whole thing and-and–”
He placed his free hand on your knee to stop you. “Okay. It's okay. I think I know where we can go. Let me make a few phone calls.”
---
PART 2
496 notes ¡ View notes
tblsomedoodles ¡ 2 years ago
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Here's an art/info dump about this stupidly cute idea that's been rotating in my brain for three day.
(the first comic here is just how they first met. they ended up in the same alley, pestering the same cat without noticing. Then the cat left and they notice they're not alone lol)
(Second is Donnie 'talking' with Mikey for the first time. He only uses Mind Mend to communicate and is just as surprised as Mikey to find it worked on him. (it has only worked with Leo before this))
I'll put the rest under a break b/c i will be going off about this and i don't want it to take up your entire feed.
I'm jokingly calling this "Mikey's Imaginary Friends" though that might change if i continue this.
Basically it's this, the twins grew up with Draxum while Raph and Mikey grew up with Splinter. Neither set knew about the other (b/c splinter though they were dead and didn't want his two remaining kids to worry about it, and Draxum was too focused on fixing his lab to pay much attention to the twins.) So, imagine Mikey's shock when, at age 8, he's out exploring topside (having snuck out) and runs into two more mutant turtles (who also snuck out and are exploring.) Thus begins an ongoing sneaking out to meet up thing between the three b/c Mikey's excited to have new friends and the twins are just as fascinated with Mikey as he is with them.
And before you ask, "hey, why doesn't Mikey tell his family about the two other turtles?" he does. Raph thinks he just made up some imaginary friends so he plays along but doesn't believe they're real. Splinter, on the other hand, thinks he's talking to Hamato ancestors due to some very big miscommunications (that i'll probably draw out at some point b/c it's silly)
Twins background wise, i'm still thinking through a lot of it, but i'll put my thoughts down anyways.
Draxum knew that training the twins at a young age would be counterproductive, so he doesn't train them beyond some basics a few times a week. Other than those sessions, he leaves them alone with their less-than-stellar caretaker, in favor of rebuilding his lab. The caretaker doesn't do much for them beyond give them food and very basic school like lessons. Beyond that the twins are left on their own.
they come to the conclusion that the only people that will care for them is themselves. They discover Mind Meld very early as a result of this and will not talk verbally b/c they found out early on with their caretaker, that if they tried to talk, they were just ignored anyways, so what's the point.
(I'm also thinking Donnie might be deaf or hard of hearing in this, with the pair of them using Mind Meld as a way for him to temporarily hear through Leo and thus keep Drax from finding out. but i'll have to do some more research before i decide for sure/figure out the specifics)
as for Meeting Mikey
That's why they became so fascinated with mikey. B/c mikey was the first person that treated them like a person and not a job or an incomplete experiment. (He's also so happy and bright, they can't avoid getting drawn to him lol)
Mikey's probably the only one they verbally start talking to, even after they teach him mind meld. (though Leo's the one to pick up on that more than Donnie. Donnie doesn't do much talking at all outside mind meld).
They also come out of their shells (hehe) a lot as they interact more with Mikey. Before they met him, they acted more like automatons, even when alone. The more they socialize with Mikey, the sillier these two get. Leo learns about puns and starts going mad with them, Donnie starts happy stimming about thing (which he has either been suppressing or just never had the urge to do before.) Basically they stop acting like little creepy statues and start acting like kids.
Honestly, it's just a cute idea with the kiddos meeting each other and Mikey inadvertently socializing his not-well-socialized brothers.
(also, the twins wear masks b/c Donnie doesn't like the smell of the city and he's worried about germs. Not for any ninja reasons, what so ever.)
Alright, that's it for my info dump. maybe more later? Maybe not? Depends on how much longer these kids keep my attentions (though right now, they're doing a pretty good job at it lol)
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the-thing-withfeathers ¡ 3 months ago
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exceeded caution part 2
first time for everything
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series masterlist | next part
a/n: heyy y’all!! so this is part 2 of exceeded caution. a lot of it follows the actual movie because i needed set-up for ghostface. there’s still a lot of interaction between the reader + sam & tara but some of it is from the first 30 minutes of scream vi essentially.
warnings: violence (gun usage, knife usage), cursing. he/him pronouns for ghostface. 5.8k words.
𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩
a few days ago, sam was nowhere near the forefront of your mind. you had stayed with the group as they navigated their way through accepting that ghostface might be back.
you hadn't spoken to tara much, you felt like you wouldn't be any help to her. she didn't need her ex-girlfriend that she only dated out of convenience around her constantly.
instead, the other carpenter sister started to find solace in your presence.
you found yourself over quite a bit, you noticed that they valued strength in numbers. you even all set a rotation between the group for who would cook that week.
during your week to cook, sam insisted on joining you when grocery shopping. as you promised her that she wouldn't be alone, she mentally promised you the same thing.
"it's just a simple beef stroganoff recipe, sam. you really don't have to come." you smiled sheepishly as you pulled up outside her apartment, she was hopping into your passenger seat.
"ghostface won't let a grocery store stop him from taking lives." sam was firm in her words, you sighed in defeat and drove off towards the shops that were only a couple minutes away from her place. you wanted her to feel safe still.
she pushed the cart while you took ingredients off the shelves, mumbling to yourself as you chucked them in the cart.
"tara used to say your food was amazing. where did you learn to cook?" she asked you, you looked away from your list to smile at her.
"my mom, she's amazing at cooking. she gave up her career to support my dad and become a fulltime housewife." you explained. "i used to help her cook all the time."
"that's pretty cool. i find myself never having the time for new foods. i should probably get on that."
"i can teach you some. or make some for you, i like cooking for people." you shrugged, taking another ingredient off the shelves.
sam would normally decline if you were anyone else, but she felt the urge to accept.
"sure. that would be nice." she nodded at you.
sam had enjoyed you being around more often and getting to know you outside of tara. she even found herself calling you a friend.
or rather, she tried to keep it at friend. she was trying to hide the fact that she felt a pull to you, she didn't know how to explain it. although, one thing was sure, there was an element of guilt to it.
she wasn’t the only one feeling guilty. you felt almost dirty with how much you thought of sam. because of the frequency of your contact, you found yourself wanting to see her more.
was this against some form of girl code that you shouldn’t want to hang out with your ex’s sister?
“um… how are you?” she could see that you were nervous to ask her that. “i know you probably get asked that all the time but i never ask… and i want to know.”
“that’s fine. i figured you would get curious. you always seem to be.” sam commented.
“is curiosity bad?” you teased a little, noting her phrasing.
“no! not at all.” she perked up, shaking her head.
“don’t worry sam, i’m joking.” you realised that the carpenter sisters weren’t used to bantering with someone they weren’t extremely close to— or someone they didn’t love.
“right.” she bit her lip. “but no? it’s not bad at all.” she chuckled. “but i’m… not okay?”
you nodded, respecting her answer and silently thanking her for being honest.
“i hoped that we would escape this when we moved. and i’ve been doing everything to protect tara but it didn’t end for sidney prescott— so i assume that it won’t end for us.” she scratched her brow, the stress getting to her. “i’m sorry you got involved.”
“it’s okay, sam. i knew what i was getting into when i dated tara.” you nodded. “if it happened again, i already knew i’d stick around.”
“that’s admirable.”
you felt your heart clench a little when she said that. nobody had ever told you that your desire to stick around was admirable. you always got “clingy” or “overbearing.” that was the first time you’d ever gotten a compliment on it.
“oh! um… thank you.” you stuttered out, a blush flooding your cheeks. you knew that sam meant it too, she wasn’t just saying it to make you feel better. she was genuinely saying it.
“it’s true.” it was.
you tried to push your flustered down into the depths of your mind as you struggled to reach the top shelf with the last of your ingredients. you were definitely taller than tara— everyone was. but not tall enough to face this eight layered shelf.
sam was.
sam was taller. and she made that perfectly clear when she basically pressed up behind you to grab this damn dijon mustard for you.
oh no… oh no… you had to stop those thoughts. you had turned around too quickly, basically coming chest to chest with the girl. she didn’t seem to mind— and you refused to mind.
you had never been this close to her before. your eyes trailed over all her features, taking them in. she looked just like tara… maybe that’s whats got your heart beating at the speed of light.
but she wasn’t tara. no, she was sam. and you found that to be what sealed the deal for you.
you found her pretty.
you remained silent as you finished off the last of the ingredient collection. you walked over to the self check-out, scanning the items as the blush continued to make its presence known as sam hovered.
you shuffled some things around in your pocket to try and find your card but before you knew it, sam was paying for your groceries.
“what—“ you tried to protest but the transaction had gone through already.
sam didn’t know what overcame her.
it was her way of taking care of you.
it was even her way of apologising to you.
"sam, you didn't have to do that." you shook your head at her.
"my treat, i didn't get to cook for everyone so this is my way of contributing." she shook you off. you knew that was a lie because mindy sent you a photo of meals you missed, one being sam's.
there was no undoing it now. you sighed and reached for the bags, but sam was one step ahead of you, grabbing them and walking out of the store.
you wished you could wash the blush off with soap.
𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩
when you arrived for dinner with your groceries. everyone was already at the carpenter’s apartment. they were spread out across the entire floor, conversing with each other.
you got to cooking almost immediately, knowing that everyone had potentially been there for a while. sam left your side to talk to quinn.
you kept feeling eyes on you.
the shorter carpenter sister was talking to mindy when she felt her attention turn away from her and onto you. she watched you cook, she actually always loved your cooking.
she loved when you would make a dinner catered just to her. she actually missed how lively the kitchen used to be when you were in it. you were even dancing around now, your headphones tucked over your ear.
she smiled a little at how you shook your waist to the music. everyone knew not to bother you so you could get it done quicker.
but tara wanted to bother you. she wanted to approach you and say something, anything to break the silence.
you were friends before everything went down. she thought that maybe she could at least salvage that, that would be her way to redemption.
mindy kept talking and talking before cutting herself off suddenly, realising that tara was no longer paying attention.
“tara, don’t.” mindy said, disappointment clear in her tone. “this is something you need to give time to.”
“there’s been a lot of time.” tara muttered, glaring at mindy.
“you can’t just break her heart and expect her to let you back in so quickly.” mindy held her shoulder back.
“i know it won’t be quick, but i have to try.” tara said through her teeth, pulling her shoulder out of mindy’s grasp and starting to make her way towards you.
tara stopped on her heels when she saw her sister already take your attention. she thought that she’d better not interrupt you.
“whatcha listening to?” sam asked you, her arms crossed over her chest.
you pulled your headphones back a little.
“sloppy jane.” you said.
“sloppy jane? what kind of name is that?!” sam laughed.
“she’s cool! i promise!” you raised your hands up in defense. you took your headphones off your head, you gently placed them on sam. your hands nicking strands of her long hair before you pulled them away.
she held eye contact with her as her head bobbed to the music, you matched the bobbing, knowing which part of the song she was on.
a smile formed on her face while you two were in sync. your eyes started to crinkle up with a smile as your hair started getting in your face when you headbanged. she joined you until the kitchen was filled with laughter.
“okay… okay. i see it now. she has a good sound.” sam agreed with you, placing the headphones back on you but leaving an ear open.
“thank you.” you chuckled, moving the beef strips into the bowl you intended to serve it in.
“this smells soooo good.” sam practically moaned out, you laughed at the noise she made.
“well, you’re gonna have to wait like everyone else!” you teased.
she groaned and rolled her eyes. you liked seeing her loosen up a bit more, you were grateful she was getting more comfortable around you.
as you two laughed, tara stared on.
she remembered when she was in sam’s place. she even felt herself grow jealous at her sister. why did she ever think that what she was doing to you was okay? your heart was gold and tara thought she had turned it dark— she realised your golden heart’s integrity never faltered. you were still just as good.
she was cruel and she broke your heart. she didn’t think she would regret it— until she suddenly felt all that guilt wash over her. was she regretting it?
you enlisted sam to help you bring all your dishes to the table.
“beef stroganoff, pasta, and rice. choose your carb to go with it and enjoy!” you presented your meal to the group.
everyone admired your work and sat down at the table. you ended up sitting beside mindy who talked your ear off about some pottery class that she and anika took.
you glanced over at sam first, her eyes meeting yours during her conversation with ethan. you two exchanged heartfelt smiles, you had a good day because of each other.
then you looked at tara, who was already looking at you. her first serving was practically gone. you knew that she loved one thing about you, and it was your cooking. she held a sadness behind those eyes, you saw into it, but you had your doubts that it was sadness.
when you noticed her plate, you felt yourself flash her a smile too. she returned it, it was shy but still genuine. her plate was cleaned up just seconds after everyone served themselves.
crumbs of you, tara would take. she cherished that smile you gave to her, even if it was forced or accidental. it filled her brain.
𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩
washing up had to be done, you wanted do it yourself, saying how you were on a roll from cooking that you wanted to do the cleaning too.
sam was about to speak up but suddenly, tara found her voice.
“i’ll help!” she said, chirping up. everyone looked at her with confusion. they didn’t expect that she would do that for you.
“oh… okay!” you said, making your way over to the kitchen.
you scrubbed the plates and handed them to her to dry. it was a good system that worked.
“you did well with dinner today. your cooking is always good.” tara smiled at you.
“thank you, tara. i appreciate it.” your lips pressed into a thin line.
“i just wanted to say that.” she put the plates onto the drying rack. “we haven’t spoken in a while.”
“i know. i just wanted to give you space. i felt like i wasn’t much help to you ever. and i felt like i wouldn’t be much help now.” you confessed. “but i want to stick around, i would be a pretty shit person if i didn’t.”
she felt horrible that you thought that you wouldn’t be help. in fact, there were some nights that tara found herself longing for you.
��we were friends before this, do you think we’d be able to get back to that?” she asked, searching your face for hope. but all she saw was doubt.
“maybe, tara.” you turned to her, handing her the last of the dishes. you saw the dejected look on her face and sighed. you wanted to go back to that too, you missed the tara that was a good friend to you. “but we can try.”
tara’s face lit up, a bit of shock also hidden between the lines. “okay! yeah… let’s try.” she put the dish away and held her hand out, you chuckled but you shook it.
what you failed to see was your maybe friend’s sister staring at you both from the living room, her jaw tightened as tara touched you.
sam zoned back into the conversation, realising that the show they were watching was long gone and replaced by the news again.
there was another death.
sam erupted in her anger, suddenly storming into the kitchen, grabbing the sharpest knife that she owned.
you had no idea what just happened, tara followed her sister back to the living room, the commotion having everyone sit up.
“sam! slow down!” tara yelled after her sister, you joined them after putting the dishes away. “can we please think about this before you decide to abandon my college education?!”
you couldn’t blame sam for wanting to leave. this was something that she just wanted to escape. as much as you would be upset, you would understand. you’d help, even.
you would help them pack up if it meant they were away from everything. you were prepared to never speak of the carpenter sisters again, in hopes that they would never have to go through this again.
“this can’t just be a coincidence, tara!” sam yelled back at her. today was the day where you saw the genetic stubbornness displayed by the carpenter sisters.
“quinn, can you please call your dad?!” tara asked their roommate, quinn immediately nodded. you could tell she didn’t want to get yelled at by sam but it was a reasonable point of action.
ring!!!
everyone flinched. you didn’t. it was just a phone ringing to you, but to everyone else, it was so much more.
sam’s phone blared on the table, she walked over only to see that it was gale weathers, she declined the call without a doubt.
you watched as quinn travelled across the room, telling sam that her father wanted to speak to her. you heard the muffled voice of mr. bailey from where you were standing.
“okay, thank you. i’ll be right there.” sam hung up. “he wants me down at the station.”
“i’ll drive you.” you said, grabbing your keys. “i live close to the station.”
“you shouldn’t have to—“ you cut sam off.
“no. i will. no man left behind, remember?” you said, firm in your decision. sam sighed but nodded.
𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩
you, sam, and tara made it out the door and started to walk to your car.
suddenly, sam’s phone rang again. the two girls stopped when they saw the name displayed on the screen.
richie kirsch.
richie? you recognized that name. you huddled closer to the sisters, closing your eyes to rack your memory for where you knew that name.
no. wait.
it couldn’t be. he was dead, wasn’t he?
“don’t pick that up.” tara said, looking up at sam.
sam hesitated, but it could be important. these calls were life or death for them. she picked up.
you looked at your surroundings. you suddenly felt so exposed, like anything could happen to you now that you weren’t in the comforts of your own home— or anyone’s home.
“who is this?” sam asked into the phone. you couldn’t hear the responses, only sam’s facial expressions changing as time went on.
her eyebrows furrowed, her eyes changed. you saw woodsboro glaze her pupils, you knew she was thinking back to her life before the city. everything was resurfacing.
“i want you to think long and hard about whether or not you wanna do this because the last two people that fucked with us ended up dead.” she said, planting her feet down with determination.
your eyes started to tear away from sam, not absorbing the conversation.
bad gut feeling.
you had to stop ignoring those.
“you better watch your back, asshole.” sam said.
and tara yelled.
a cloaked figure sporting a ghostface mask suddenly grabbed tara, you sprung into action. tara elbowed the figure and you shoved him into the bike rack.
“go!” you said, running just behind the two sisters.
“there!” sam redirected you into a little corner store. you stood with your front to the door while the girls yelled at the cashier to help them, starting a fight with someone in line.
suddenly ghostface walked in.
you backed up into sam, pushing her backwards a little bit while one of the customers stood tall in front of the infamous killer.
you watched as ghostface drove their knife into the man, multiple times.
you gasped, your hand flying to your mouth. you had never seen anyone get killed before. you thought ghostface had specific targets, this wasn’t just an ordinary killer, this killer wasn’t afraid to take any life that stood in his way.
you turned around and the three of you flooded into the back of the store as the clerk wielded his gun.
when the first gunshot rang, sam’s arm flew to cover you as chips flew everywhere. tara was crouched just beside the two of you.
suddenly, there was a second gunshot. but only after you heard the clerk start begging for his life.
you tried to stay quiet, you didn’t realise where parts of your body were. you had a hand on sam’s abdomen, bunching her shirt into your fist. you were terrified, you had never gone through this before. you couldn’t imagine what sam & tara were feeling.
you couldn’t move— or else he would know where you were.
the corner store was quiet, it was like a cruel game of cat and mouse. you heard crunching as the sound of boots got closer to you.
all three of you rounded the corner to avoid detection. sam hid behind a freezer while you and tara hid behind the shelving. you saw sam’s eyes flicker to a can on the ground and you knew what she was trying to say.
carefully, you reached out and picked the can off the floor. it was disgusting and sticky. was this what they had to result to when defending themselves? putting themselves in disgusting situations? you felt twisted picturing them going through this once— now twice.
you threw the can across the corner store, hearing boots walk in the other direction. it was a successful distraction. the three of you started crawling towards the exit.
when you heard the boots stop moving again, you paused. sam leaned forward, you could tell that she could see a lot clearer than you. she slowly inched towards the shelving, then she suddenly shoved it with her shoulder, knocking it down.
god, she was strong.
had she been training herself to get stronger? in case this happened again?
the three of you hauled ass to the exit, being met with cop cars and their sirens.
the three of you were escorted into the cars. the sisters rode in one while you went in the other. you fidgeted with your fingers. then it was daunting on you.
baby’s first ghostface attack.
𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩
you sat in an interrogation room at the precinct. the walls were closing in on you.
you had been close to death before. you remember when you and your parents got into that gnarly car accident that had you coming out with several broken bones and whiplash. you cradled your arm, feeling the after-effects of the worst injury you sustained.
but this wasn't a car t-boning yours. this was a killer.
and you felt like death was kissing your cheek.
you didn't know where sam and tara were, you assumed a different interrogation room. you were waiting for ages, you thought that maybe someone was attending to them first.
you sat in silence for about ten more minutes, trying to decompress the situation.
the lock clicked and the door swung open, revealing detective bailey. you had met quinn's dad in passing, never really speaking to him.
"mr. bailey. how are you?" you asked him, sitting up in your chair. you noticed he had files in his hand. this was going to take longer than you wanted.
"i'm good. thank you... how are you doing? you weren't around for woodsboro, i'm sure it's a bit of a shock to be involved now." straight into it.
"a bit is an understatement, sir." you let out a dry chuckle. "i'm assuming you're going to be asking me more than just 'how are you' though..."
"i'm sorry. i know you're probably tired." he sighed, you nodded. you were trying to hold back a yawn.
"it's fine."
he sat down across from you, opening the file and putting its contents in front of you.
"you're the newest addition to the group, quinn has talked about you. i know you and tara had a past relationship. were you frequently in and out of their apartment?" he asked.
"yeah... tara and i were together for a bit. i usually visited her and i also hang out with mindy and chad, so yes, i was frequently at theirs." you nodded, you often found that honesty was the best policy with these things.
"i know that your relationship with her ended badly." he stated, you scoffed.
"surely a bad break-up isn't enough motivation to go on these killing sprees, right?" you asked, a bit offended.
"sometimes it might just be."
"did you have access to sam carpenter's belongings?" he followed up. what did sam's stuff have to do with this?
"um... no. not really. i never really interacted with sam until ghostface was rumored to resurface. and even then, i don't really have that access." you crossed your arms across your chest, your eyes scanning the photos on the desk. you spotted a photo of sam's license, bloodied and dumped at the scene of the crime.
someone was trying to frame her.
"we found sam's license next to the body."
"well she was with me all day. we went grocery shopping and i cooked everyone dinner." you quickly jumped at the chance to defend her. "tara was there too."
mr. bailey nodded at you confirming their alibi.
"sam said the same thing." he reassured you. he leaned in a bit closer to you. "although, i'd be cautious about those sisters. especially sam. i wouldn't get too close."
your brows furrowed in frustration.
"i'm sure i have nothing to worry about. they're good people." you didn't want to speak any further on the matter.
you hated that the thought of either of them being responsible for these deaths even crossed the detective's mind. he was supposed to be helping them.
two knocks against the door turned the detective's attention to another officer walking into the room.
"the fbi is here." the officer said. detective bailey looked confused.
"the fbi? where?" he stood up then turned to you. "you're free to go. i think sam and tara are waiting for you."
you stood from your seat and followed him, making your way over to the two dark-haired sisters. tara was the first to spot you, nudging sam until she turned around.
you sped up, you didn't know what it was. you just had to make sure she was real.
you wrapped your arms around sam. you felt her tense up out of shock but return the gesture.
"i'm sorry." you apologised for the sudden hug.
"it's okay." sam smiled warmly.
you turned to tara and put a hand on her shoulder, squeezing softly.
tara's eyes met yours. those pleading doe eyes, they wanted more than just a squeeze on the shoulder. she wished she was sam in that moment.
"i'm really glad you two are okay." you cleared your throat. sam smiled at you, even if it was forced, it was nice to see.
you heard two voices chatting just a little bit aways from you. sam started moving towards them, you and tara followed behind.
"kirby?" she spoke, getting the attention of a blonde woman.
"hey sam." kirby replied, moving to hug sam as well.
"do you know each other?" bailey asked.
"yeah... we went to woodsboro high together. she was a senior when i was a freshman." sam clarified. you studied the woman in front of you.
all you could say was that she looked cool. she was an fbi agent that had been monitoring the sisters for a little while. you realised that this had been the kirby involved with the killings too. they shared a very unique experience between each other.
you stayed behind sam while they conversed. kirby was handed the mask that was left at the scene. the mask used in the 2011 killings. kirby lifted her shirt to show the scar that charlie walker gave her.
sam looked uncomfortable. she realised then that this was bigger than just a killing spree, they were trying to send a message.
kirby proposed you all worked together but sam interjected, not giving her the chance to finish.
"we're getting out of town." she pushed through kirby and detective bailey.
"i'm sorry, that's not possible. you're both persons of interest. all three of you are." bailey warned.
"are you serious?" tara stepped forward, the growing frustration evident in her voice.
"he's right." kirby confirmed. "but if we work together-"
"we're going." sam basically barked an order at you and tara.
"my car's back at your place." you said. sam nodded. a small part of her brain was happy that you would be around after that.
𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩
when the three of you made your way out of the precinct, you had never seen so many cameras before. reporters swarmed the three of you, immediately asking sam questions like if she had an alibi or if tara felt safe with her sister.
they didn't pay you any mind, how could they? you were fresh meat to the group, they didn't care about your story. luckily, it allowed you to mercilessly shove them back, helping make space for sam and tara to walk through the flood.
you found yourself holding onto sam's waist, pulling her towards the open spots you've created with your body pushing against the reporters.
"gale weathers." a voice sounded out in the crowd, causing the sisters to stop in their tracks. you knew that name too, it felt like an endless revision on who was who, if you had studied well enough. "do you ladies think that you're the reason that the ghostface killer has come to the big apple?" she asked.
you saw it in sam. she snapped. she'd had a long night, she nearly lost her life. she nearly lost her sister. and her... friend.
she swung with her fist out.
"sam!" you exclaimed as gale ducked, avoiding the punch. you pulled sam's waist back, you knew she didn't need another video of her going viral. she put her hands over yours, allowing you to hold her back. you had to admit, it felt nice knowing you had a bit of pull on her.
although, you failed to account for the shorter carpenter sister. you failed to catch her pulling her elbow back and swinging at gale with a force of her own.
you jumped at the noise made by the contact and had to hold back a laugh at gale's shocked face. sam cracked a smile, she couldn't help herself.
"stay away from us." tara spat at gale.
you two turned to walk towards a cab that was parked outside the station. you pushed sam slightly by her waist, hoping she wouldn't turn back around.
but gale weathers just had to say something.
"are you two seriously still mad about what happened?"
"you wrote a book. about them." she didn't expect you to say anything. she didn't know who you were or what you were to the carpenters. she looked at you as if you were irrelevant, like another body that ghostface could dispose of just to raise the numbers.
"and who are you?" she asked, a snark in her voice.
"doesn't matter. you took advantage of them. of the fact that they lost their friends, they nearly lost each other." you shook your head. "i remember you, from tara's stories."
tara watched you fight back. how could you still do that after she hurt you? you were full of surprises. she had never seen your tongue so laced with venom before.
"you lost someone too. dewey... if someone kept shoving that down your throat, how would you feel?" you asked, glaring her way as sam and tara entered the cab. gale's stance shifted, she was uncomfortable with a stranger knowing so much information about her personal life. but then again, she put the carpenter sisters' life out there for the whole world to see.
"i remember your book too. you called sam unstable, you painted her in the worst light possible. and i thought you had been through enough with her to know that that's not true." you turned back to the two girls, opening the door to the back of the cab for them.
sam's face was unreadable as she hopped into the car. she stared at the back of your head, or more like the back of your seat. you stood up for her, breaking your kind and golden-hearted demeanour. she was worried that being in this situation would change you for the worst.
you sat in silence after telling the driver where to go. leaning back into your seat, you tried to keep your eyes open. you hadn't gotten any sleep since last night, your time divided between the carpenter residence and the station.
there was so little to say and yet so many words were jumbled in your brain.
when you arrived at the carpenter's apartment, you yawned as you exited the cab. sam caught you do so and stopped you before you could unlock your car. her hand covered yours, gripping it in her own.
"you should rest here for a little bit. you're too tired to drive." she said, looking down at you. you wanted to get home and sleep in your own bed but you knew she was right.
you put your car keys away and walked upstairs with them.
tara immediately made a beeline for the bathroom. she always showered after coming home, she couldn't go a day without smelling like vanilla.
sam put pillows and blankets down on their couch and walked into her room, coming back out with some clothes.
"you can change into these for now, you might as well make yourself comfortable. and you can sleep for as long as you want." she said, you took the clothes and nodded at her.
she sat down on the couch and pulled the blanket up slightly to cover herself, you grabbed the blanket to stop her.
"what are you doing? i'll take the couch." you said, furrowing your brows.
"no. you'll take my bed." she looked up at you from the couch.
"it's your damn bed, sam." you didn't mean to sound so ill-mannered but the tiredness was getting the best of you.
"i know. so i'll do with it as i please." you know it was just her trying to show that she cared. "so you're taking it."
you sighed sharply, you were about to take a massive risk.
"share it with me." you said, holding your ground. you didn't want to kick sam out of her own bed.
she saw the determination on your face. you two were going to sit here and bicker if she didn't give in now. she nodded, standing up and making her way back to her room.
you changed into sam's clothes, her scent wafting as the shirt fell over your figure. then you cracked the door open enough to slip yourself into her room.
just as you entered sam's room, tara came out of the bathroom. she had the look of a shattered woman on her face, you should have been going into her room. she should have offered first.
you shut the door behind you, walking towards the bed where sam was sitting. you spotted her nursing her hand, spotting a deep cut from crawling on glass at the bodega.
"sam, you should've gotten that taken care of." you scolded her a little, walking to her bathroom and grabbing a medkit you knew was there. tara had told you that she put one in every bathroom.
you knelt in front of sam, unpacking the kit to grab the antiseptic and a bandage.
"it's fine, it's only a cut." she protested.
"if ghostface doesn't get you, an infected cut will. and i think that's extremely embarrassing." you tried to make light of it, your exhaustion washing over you. "this'll hurt."
you dabbed the antiseptic into sam's cut. she hissed at the sting. but the sight in front of her was better. you, in her clothes, patching her up. this was probably the worst time for her to form a crush, and probably the worst person to form it on. her sister's ex-girlfriend, who was now involved in the ghostface killings. but your soft features, your concern for her, it was hard to resist you.
she chalked it up to exhaustion, maybe this crush would fade away when she was in her right mind.
but when you situated yourself next to her in bed, your respectful nature forcing you to leave ample space so you two weren't touching each other, she hoped that she would one day earn the honour of closing that gap.
as she closed her eyes, she listened in to your soft breathing. and even when you accidentally ended up shoulder to shoulder in bed,
sam refused to move.
𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩
author's journal okay i actually spent way too much time on this chapter, i had to write out the first 30 minutes of scream vi with a reader insert so it was a little bit more cohesive with the storyline. i don't know how i feel about this one chapter in particular but i'm starting to see the vision for the rest of the series teehee. i promise it wont just be the whole movie written down but it'll definitely have canon events. next chapter is most likely going to be non-canon as much as possible just cause this is a romance fic at the end of the day.
also this is the song i intended for the reader to be listening to with sam
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Text
Honey Girl. Chapter Four.
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Chapter One. Chapter Two. Chapter Three. Chapter Five. Chapter Six. Chapter Seven. Chapter Eight. Chapter Nine. Chapter Ten. Series Masterlist. The Playlist.
Chapter Synopsis - You and Bucky deal with the fallout of Cora's reveal. What's that saying? If you love something, let it go...
Pairing - Dad'sBestFriend! Bucky Barnes x Female Reader - soulmate au
Age Rating - 18+
Warnings - cursing. angst. alcohol consumption.
Word Count - 5k
Author's Note - i can only apologise that this chapter took a little while!! my life is at a super weird place rn, so i'm just trying to find the time when i can. words cannot describe how incredible all of your support is for Honey Girl. the fact you all reblog and comment and send me asks means the world to me. love you all so much.
as always, reblogs, comments and feedback (even anonymous feedback) are immensely appreciated!! your reblogs are the only way to circulate my fics, which keeps me going <3
Masterlist. Inbox.
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You can't breathe.
It's like all of the oxygen has been sucked out of the air, leaving it dry, brittle, sterile. Your lungs are burning, scratched like sandpaper. The backyard is spinning, like teenagers at a roller rink - all flashing lights and endless rotations.
You haven't taken your eyes off of Bucky, and he hasn't taken his eyes off of you. If you were thinking more logically, you'd probably realise that you've been staring at each other for too long, and it's starting to look a little suspicious. You don't care.
Your ears are ringing. It's like there's been an explosion, and you're scattered amongst the debris. Smoke, flames, rubble. A catastrophic detonation in your parents backyard.
A gentle hand on your shoulder snaps you back to reality. The music is still playing, everyone around the table is still conversing, the house still stands. No explosion here.
"Sweetheart?"
It's your Mom, clearly sensing your distress. She probably thinks you're upset with her, for telling Cora. You are, but that's not what's causing the pain in your chest.
"Come inside with me, baby girl. Let's get away from the noise for a second."
She grabs your hand and pulls you out of your chair, still none the wiser to the magnetism preventing you from breaking your gaze that's locked on Bucky's. She practically drags you inside, the cool air of the kitchen waking you up.
"Sweetheart, I am so, so sorry. Cora overheard the conversation we had earlier. I thought it was good news, so I didn't think to ask her to keep it private."
She looks like she's being eaten alive by guilt. Your bottom lip quivers, your eyes well up, and before you know it, there are warm, salty tears dripping down your cheeks.
"Hey, hey. What's the matter?"
You sit down on the tiled floor, back pressed against the cabinets. Curling your knees to your chest, you try to stifle your sobs.
"Everything's such a mess, Mama."
She drops to the ground, gathering you in her arms. She holds you as tight as she can, rubbing soothing circles into your back and whispering comforting words in your ear. Eventually, she pulls back to look at you.
"What's the matter, baby? I thought Stella's call was a good thing - that you'd be excited to go back to California."
You take a shaky breath before replying.
"It's just... I think - I don't, it's... it's so complicated."
She traces her fingers over your cheeks, your eyebrows, your nose. She dances her fingertips over your face, as if she's committing it to her mind forever. It brings back warm and cosy childhood memories of her doing the same thing to help you sleep. The two of you would snuggle up against all of your pillows in bed, tucked up and safe. She'd lie with you until she was sure you were dreaming, before kissing you on the forehead and sneaking out.
"Talk to me. We can figure it out. We always do."
"It's not that simple. I just... there's a lot going on, I guess. I thought it'd be an easy decision, but it isn't, and it's all I can think about, and it's eating me up because I'm so scared I'm gonna do the wrong thing -"
You cut yourself off with a sob, resting your head on your knees.
"I knew there was something bothering you, sweetheart. Why didn't you come and talk to us? Even if we can't fix it, we can listen."
"I thought I could handle it. I thought I could figure it out on my own."
"You don't ever have to carry stress like this on your own, baby girl. Ever. You hear me?"
You nod and lean into her, letting her rock you in her arms on the kitchen floor.
"I'm sorry again, about Cora. She means well, you know she does."
"I know. Doesn't feel like it sometimes, but I know."
A pause.
"Okay, sweetheart. What are we going to do now? Whatever you decide, we'll support you."
"Your Mom's right," your Dad says from the doorway. "Whatever you choose, we'll be right alongside you. No matter what."
He strides over to join the two of you on the floor, sandwiching you between him and your Mom.
"If you need help packing up and moving, we're here. If you need us to create an elaborate lie to tell Stella, we're here. Either way, you've got us."
You smile at him gently, leaning to rest your head on his shoulder. Regardless of what happens, you have two parents that love you more than anything in the world. That has to count for something.
"You wanna rejoin us outside, or are you too tired? No one will blame you if you go home."
"I think I'll go home," you murmur. "I don't wanna face any more questions for today."
"Bucky's just gone too. Said something about an early morning tomorrow."
You inhale shakily at the mention of his name. You know you'll have to face him sooner or later.
Your Dad stands and grabs your hands to help you to your feet, before doing the same to your Mom. They both hug you tightly before walking you out to the front door.
"Promise me you'll call if you need anything. Anything."
"I promise, Mama. Don't worry about me. I'll be okay."
"Do you want one of us to walk you home?"
"No, it's okay. I think I need the air."
"Love you, baby girl."
"Love you too. Both of you."
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
You're halfway home when you decide to turn around. You need to talk to Bucky.
It doesn't take you long to figure out where he is. You can feel in your chest that he's close by, that he hasn't strayed far. He hasn't gone home, though. The Universe is pulling you in the opposite direction.
The beach.
You spin on your heel and start walking down the road, picking up pace as you go. You can feel rain in the air, threatening to spill from the clouds at any given moment. Before you know it, you're running, sprinting along the sidewalk in the direction of your soulmate.
You get to the small boardwalk and look out over the sand. The sky is grey as concrete, cold and unforgiving. You spot a figure in a worn brown leather jacket by the shore, and you know instantly. It's him.
You march onto the beach with your shoes still on, wrapping your arms around yourself to act as a shield from the wind. You left your jacket at your parent's house, too eager to get out of there in a hurry. The rain is suspended in the air, never quite reaching the ground. You know it's only a matter of time before the heavens open.
"Bucky!" you yell, practically bounding across the sand. "Buck!"
He doesn't turn because he hears your voice. He turns because he suddenly feels like he can breathe, which he hasn't been able to do for the last hour. He knew you were there before you shouted his name.
"Bucky, please!"
He spins on his heel and stops walking, waiting for you to catch up with him. You're sprinting, panting as you reach him. The ocean waves crash against the shore, dangerously close to his boots.
"Buck, just let me explain," you choke out, trying to catch your breath.
You finally stop running and look at him. He looks broken. His hair looks like he's pulled his fingers through it repeatedly, tear tracks staining his cheeks, lips bitten red. You've never seen him upset like this. It's the worst thing you've ever witnessed.
"There's nothing to explain," he begins calmly, trying to keep a lid on his feelings.
"There is, Buck. There is. I... Cora overheard me confiding in my Mom, telling her about a call I'd gotten, from a classmate at culinary school. It was just an offer - I haven't accepted anything! I never meant for you to find out like this, I swear. It's all just... it's all so fucked up."
He looks at you in disbelief.
"No, you know what's fucked up?" he asks, raising his voice. "Finding out that my soulmate is moving across the country from some alcoholic suburban mom at a dinner party!"
You've never heard him yell before. You don't like it at all. You gather yourself before replying calmly, determined to keep you emotions under wraps.
"I've been trying to find a way to talk to you about it, but I didn't know where to start. How do I even begin to explain any of this?"
"Maybe, I don't know - 'hey, Buck, I got a call and I'm thinking of moving thousands of miles away for my dream job,' would be a good place to start?"
"It's more complicated than that. I was trying to protect you."
"Protect me from what?"
"From blowing your life up for me!"
You stare at each other for a minute, both of you unblinking.
"What are you talking about?" he croaks out.
"You'd drop everything for me, Bucky, and I can't let you do that. You've worked too damn hard to let it all go."
He's dumbfounded, for a moment. Not because he doesn't understand. No. He's realising that you're right.
"I knew that if I told you straight away, you'd have persuaded me to let you come with, and I would have said yes. And then you'd regret it, and you'd resent me, and we'd be over before we've even begun."
When he doesn't say anything, you continue.
"The thing is, Buck, the selfish part of me would have happily invited you along. Me and you, in California, running a bakery? That sounds like a fucking dream. But I have to listen to the other side of me, the selfless part. And that part is telling me that you have worked too damn hard for too damn long just for me to take that all away."
You feel droplets of water on your face, and for a moment, you wonder when you started to cry again. Then, in the deep distance, you hear a crack of thunder. The rain begins to pour, both of you caught in a storm in more ways than one.
"You don't get to make a decision like that for me!" he finally responds, yelling to be heard over the downpour. "We're supposed to talk about these things! To figure them out together! That's what soulmates are - we're a team!"
"I can't think rationally around you, Bucky! It's like all logic goes out the window. I'm just so overwhelmed with-"
You stop yourself before the word comes out, but you both know what you were about to say. He feels it in his ribcage, the surge of emotion from you.
"-with how I feel about you. You're my forever, Buck, and I feel like -" a sob wracks through you, shaking your frame. "-like I've fucked it all up already."
Your tears mix with the rainwater, trailing down your cheeks. You watch as Bucky fights with himself, internally battling his feelings.
"You're not the only one fucking it up," he chokes. "You repeatedly told me we had to take it slow, but I just... couldn't help myself. I've never felt for anyone what I feel for you, and being away from you for even a minute is fucking torture. I moved us too fast, and now look where we are. We've become the equivalent of a married couple in a couple of weeks. No one can handle change that sudden."
"It's not.. none of this is your fault, Buck. I kept something from you, something big. I know it doesn't matter now, but I want you to know how hard it's been to not tell you. It was killing me."
"I felt it," he murmurs shakily, willing himself not to cry. "In my chest. You were so torn up about something, and I just couldn't figure out what it was. I should have pushed you more, but I was worried I'd push you away."
Your lip trembles as you watch him bite his own anxiously.
"I'm so scared, Buck," you whisper. "I feel so lost and so confused and like nothing makes sense."
"Me too," he whispers back, eyes never leaving yours. "I'm fucking terrified. Our worlds have been turned upside down."
"Is it... is it supposed to be this hard? Everyone makes it sound so easy."
"I don't know. Maybe the Universe heard that we were anti-soulmate and decided to be super tough on us. Cosmic karma, or something."
You choke out a laugh through your tears. The rain has plastered your clothes to your body, the salty wind chilling you to the bone. Without thinking, Bucky takes off his jacket and wraps it around you, unable to watch you shiver any longer.
"What now?" you ask quietly. If he wasn't standing so close, he wouldn't have heard it.
"Let's get out of the storm," he suggests, nodding his head towards the path home. "We can talk some more somewhere warmer."
You sniffle and take a deep breath, willing yourself to get it together. Bucky surprises you by linking your hand with his, warm fingers intertwining around yours.
He doesn't let go the whole way home.
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
Bucky takes you to his house.
You haven't been here since before your Tethering. You walk in the door, and your knees threaten to give way.
It's overwhelming.
Everywhere - everything - smells like Bucky. His scent clings to every fabric, every upholstery, every room. There's pictures scattered across the mantelpiece, his handsome face staring at you wherever you go. The house is warm, cosy, and just so Bucky it makes your heart ache.
You walk over to the fireplace, taking a closer look at the array of frames adorning it. There's one of your parents and Bucky smiling, sat out on his lawn last summer; another of Bucky and his team of mechanics, stood proudly outside his garage. A small black frame catches your eye. You pick it up, and your breath hitches in your chest.
It's a picture of the two of you on the deck of his boat, the day after you found out you were soulmates. The wind is blowing your hair, billowing your shirts, sun beating down on your skin. You're both beaming at the camera, bright and blinding, completely content.
You're holding back tears as you put it back in it's original place.
"My favourite picture," he murmurs from somewhere behind you. "We look happy."
"We were happy," you whisper. Then, quieter, "We will be again."
A pause.
"You want something to drink? Coffee, cocoa? Oh, I have that tea you like, the apple one?"
"You do?"
"Yeah. I, uh, bought some last time I went grocery shopping. In case you stopped by."
"Tea sounds good. Please."
You stay stood in the middle of the living room while Bucky puts the kettle on the stove, worried that your wet clothes will ruin his couch. As if he's read your mind, he pops his head around the door.
"There's a load of fresh clothes folded on top of the dryer. Grab whatever you want, dry off a little."
You wander into the laundry room, sorting through the pile. You find a t shirt with his garage logo on the back in big, white letters.
J.B.B. Motorcycles and Automotives.
The blocky, bold font swirls across the black material. You run your fingers over it, tracing the curves and spikes of the typeface. It's something you've seen him in a million times. You inhale deeply as you slip it over your head, revelling in the way it smells like him. You grab some boxer shorts and slip those on too, glad to finally be warm and dry.
Bucky loses his breath when you walk into the room. He's never seen you in his clothes before, and for good reason. He's about to have a goddamn heart attack.
"Tea is on the coffee table," he chokes out. "I'm gonna change, and then we'll talk, yeah?"
You nod gently, settling into the cushions of his couch and tucking your legs underneath you, mug warming your hands.
When Bucky returns, he's in sweatpants and an oversized hoodie that you want to burrow yourself into. He takes his place, careful to put a little distance between you. Far enough that you're not touching, but close enough that you almost are.
"I'm sorry," you whisper. "I'm not good at this."
"Neither am I," he smiles gently. "It's my first time having a soulmate."
"Mine too," you laugh softly.
It floors you, his ability to always be able to comfort you. It's like a superpower, the way he always knows what to say or do to put you at ease.
"I think we got a little ahead of ourselves," he begins, careful to keep his voice low and deliberate. "I keep forgetting that we have forever. Literally. I was so eager to rush into this with you because I got excited. Don't get me wrong, I'm still ridiculously excited, but I'm realising now that our version of 'slow' wasn't slow at all."
"This whole Tethering thing makes everything so intense. There have been times where I honestly thought I was going to drop dead if you didn't kiss me."
"The feelings mutual," he chuckles.
You lace your fingers with his, never breaking eye contact, before addressing the elephant in the room.
"What am I gonna do about California, Buck?"
Your voice cracks just saying the word.
"Stella needs an answer, and I've upset you, and my parents are clueless, and I just - I don't know what to do. Tell me what to do. Please."
"I can't tell you what to do, honey," he soothes, running his thumb over the back of your hand. "And I'm not upset. I was, in the backyard... but I was mainly just blindsided. I kinda get it, you not telling me. I'm not sure what I'd do in your situation either."
"I just feel like both decisions are wrong. I can't win."
"Hey, hey. Look at me, pretty baby."
Bucky cradles your face in his warm hands, forcing your eyes to meet his ocean blue ones. You have to focus on his words, so you don't get lost in the waves of his irises.
"At the end of the day, it's completely your decision, and no one in the world can change that. But-"
He takes a deep breath, and continues.
"I think that you'll regret it every day for the rest of your life if you don't take the incredible opportunity that's been offered to you."
You take a second to process what he's telling you, your mind running at a thousand miles an hour.
"Are you... you're... are you saying I should take the job?"
"Like I said, it's your decision, but... yes. I'm saying you should take the job."
Your eyes well with tears, and you bite your lip to stop them from escaping. Inhaling carefully, you put your hands on his chest, feeling his steady heartbeat under your palms. He's calm. He's sure. He's collected enough for the both of you.
"What about us?" you ask, barely above a whisper.
"Like you said, baby. I'm your forever." Buck leans in, resting his forehead to yours. "We have time."
"All the time in the world."
You connect your lips to Bucky's softly, testing the waters. He kisses you back with so much feeling, tears slip from your lashes without warning. He's crying too, emotion mixing with yours, dousing you both.
You pull away and wrap your arms around him, curling yourself into his chest. He holds you as tightly as he can, knowing this will be the last time for a long time.
"So you'll go."
"I'll go."
"And I'll stay."
"You'll stay."
"And we'll be okay. No matter what, we'll be okay."
You and Bucky fall asleep in each others arms, cherishing the feeling of home one last time.
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
The happiness is starting to seep through.
You're devastated to be leaving Bucky behind, but you're trying to look on the bright side. Sunny beaches, new people, your dream job. If you think about the positives for long enough, the Bucky sized hole in your chest hurts a little less.
You're packing up your bookshelf when your phone rings, scaring the life out of you.
"Bitch!"
You know who it is instantly.
"Hi, Lacie."
"Where have you been? Why didn't you answer my text from last night?"
"Shit, sorry. I've been packing. What's up?"
"We're going out tonight. Not just us - all the girls. We're throwing you a goodbye party!"
You groan inwardly, massaging your temples with your fingers.
"A party? Lace, I don't need a party."
"Babe, you do. You really do. It'll be fun! I thought you'd be excited!"
You take a deep breath, and remember what you've been telling yourself. Focus on the positives.
"Okay, fine. Where? What time? What should I wear?"
"I knew you'd say yes! Come to my place at like... six? We can get ready together, like old times! And wear something sexy."
She doesn't wait for you to argue, just hangs up the phone. She knows you too well.
You know it'll be good for you, to see your girlfriends - but the thought of all the goodbyes you're about to say breaks your heart a little more.
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
"Okay, what the fuck is going on with you?"
You're sat cross legged on Lacie's living room floor, sharing makeup that's scattered across the coffee table. You sip your wine for a moment, trying to come up with an excuse. It's no use.
"I don't know."
"Bullshit."
You turn to look at her.
"What?"
"It's bullshit, babe. Something's going on. You've been given your dream job, and you're moping around like you just got broken up with or something. Why aren't you happy?"
There's no malice in her voice, just pure love. She adores you. You adore her. She's the one person with an outsiders perspective on all of this. So, you cut the act.
"I had my Tethering."
Silence.
She's processing.
"What?!"
"Yeah."
"When? Who? Where? How? Oh my God what is happening? Why didn't you say anything? Fuck, I'm gonna cry. I'm so overwhelmed right now, I'm so happy for you! Wait... are we not happy?"
"It's... complicated."
There's a lump in your throat, but a levity in your heart. A weight has been taken off you. Telling someone the truth has made you feel a little lighter.
"Who is it, babe?"
You take a deep breath, and look her in the eyes.
"Bucky."
Her jaw drops.
"Your... your Dad's best friend Bucky?"
"That's the one."
"Oh. My. Fucking. God."
"Yeah."
"Holy shit."
"Yeah."
"This is complicated."
"Yeah."
"Aw, babe."
She pulls you in for a hug, not caring about the makeup you're smearing across her shirt. You cling to her as tightly as you can, savouring your best friends comfort.
"Does anyone else know?"
"No. We decided not to tell my parents for a while."
"Shit. No wonder you've been so sad lately. You're moving across the country, away from the one person you're supposed to be near."
"It's really hard," you whisper, tears threatening to spill.
"I can't even begin to imagine," she murmurs, holding you close. "I wish you'd told me sooner. We could have talked about it."
"I know," you sniffle. "I thought I could handle it on my own, but I really can't."
"You're not on your own, okay? You have Bucky, and you have me. You can always talk to me about this stuff. God knows I talked your ear off about Cameron."
You laugh softly, thinking back to that day that feels both like yesterday and a million years ago.
"Where is he tonight?"
"Out with his boys. It's good for us to spend a few hours apart."
You smile at the happiness that's radiating off her. She's glowing, beaming in all directions.
"Thanks, Lace. I love you. You know that right?"
"Of course I do. I love you too. So much," she leans forward to kiss your cheek. "Now let's have one hell of a last girls night, shall we?"
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
You've lost track of exactly where you are.
You know you're downtown somewhere, in one of the bars. This one smells like wood and whiskey, lowlit and smoky. You hit the cocktail bar first, then the one covered in leopard print, then the monochrome pink one. Now, you're here.
The six of you are sat at a booth, high heels tangled and legs intertwined under the table. The wood is sticky with lemon wedges from tequila shots, salt scattered across the surface.
"If you find any hot west coast men, will you send them my way?" Reese asks, nudging you with her shoulder.
"And if you find any hot west coast women, will you send them mine?"
Everyone laughs, the scent of perfume filling the air.
"Rosa, what happened to Aubrey? We liked her!"
"Caught her kissing my ex girlfriend. So now they're both my ex girlfriends."
"Jesus Christ."
"Man, that's rough," Lacie giggles next to you.
The other girls continue to talk about Aubrey's infidelity as Lacie leans to whisper in your ear.
"Have you said goodbye to Bucky yet?"
You nod.
"Yesterday. I stayed the night, we fell asleep together. Said our goodbyes in the morning. It was awful."
"Love you," she whispers, squeezing your hand under the table.
"Love you too," you reply, squeezing back.
"There's a table of super hot guys over there," Maggie observes, tilting her head in their direction. "Maybe we should conveniently dance that way in a little while."
You don't bother to look over, knowing that none of them will compare to your soulmate. The other girls seem interested, though, so you smile along with them.
"Babe," Sam hisses, kicking you under the table. "There's a hot guy at that table, three o'clock, that keeps staring at you."
You glance over, and your heart stutters in your chest.
Bucky.
His blue eyes pierce your soul, even from across the room. For a moment, it's only the two of you, all the noise forgotten.
You're snapped back to reality by Sam.
"Fuck, he's hot. If you don't want him, I do."
"You should talk to him," Lacie suggests quickly. "Why not, right?"
She's practically pushing you out of the booth, high school wrestler style. In another life, you think, she would have made a good football player. All five foot four of her.
You walk past his table, eyes still locked on him, and towards the bathrooms. You know he'll follow you. You walk to the end of the hallway and out of the door, into the fresh night air.
You feel him appear before you see him. You lean your body against the wall, head resting on the cold brick. Bucky stands in front of you, shirt stretched across his shoulders gorgeously.
"Hi."
"Hi, honey baby."
You smile softly at the nickname.
"What are you doing here?"
"I got dragged to a boys night. What are you doing here?"
"I got dragged to a girls night."
He laughs, and all the tension melts from your muscles.
"Thought we said our goodbyes. I didn't think I'd see you again before I left."
"Me too. But you know the Universe. It hates us."
"Cosmic karma," you whisper.
The two of you stand down the alleyway, looking at each other carefully. Neither of you wants to spook the other person. You'd processed your leaving, said your emotional goodbyes. And now he's here, standing in front of you. You don't want to have to do it all again.
"I should probably get back inside, before the girls get the wrong idea."
"Baby, I followed you to the bathroom. They've already got the wrong idea."
You chuckle, kicking at a rock on the ground.
"Yeah. I don't know how I'm gonna explain this."
A smile. A pause.
"I'll let you get back to your friends, then."
You lean up to press a kiss to his stubbled cheek.
"Bye, Buck."
"Bye, pretty girl."
You push off the wall and walk away towards the door. Suddenly, a warm hand wraps around your wrist, yanking you into a solid chest.
Bucky kisses you like a man possessed. There's nothing gentle about it - just pure, unadulterated passion. It's all teeth and tongue and nipping and biting, neither of you willing to be the first to pull away.
He walks you back into the wall, pushing you against the rough brick. You hike a leg up onto his hip as he grabs your thigh to pull you closer, desperate to feel all of you. Your hands are in his hair, around his neck, tangled in his collar, his shirt, his belt loops. Anything you can get your hands on, you grab.
A distant chorus of cheers break you out of your lust fuelled haze. A bachelorette party walks by, one of the women winking at you as they go. You and Bucky take a step away from each other, straightening out your clothes and fixing your hair.
"Promise me you'll call me if you need anything," Bucky murmurs, leaning to rest his forehead on yours.
"I promise," you whisper, almost against his lips. "Goodbye, Bucky."
"Goodbye, honey girl."
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
The salty ocean wind whips through your hair, sun beating down onto your skin, some upbeat pop song humming from the radio. You keep your eyes glued to the road in front of you, begging yourself not to look back. You know if you do, you'll turn the car around and run straight back into Bucky's arms.
Let the happiness seep through, you remind yourself, gripping the steering wheel.
Let the happiness seep through.
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Leonardo's First Love—Splinter's Talk
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When Leo realized his heart was being divided, he felt afraid. 
His attention had always been captured by his family and his mission—he knew what it was like to love them. But never had he thought his love was going to be snatched up, split, and taken almost wholly by someone of the race that thought they were monsters. 
When Leo noticed the pull towards something else, something new, he pushed himself away. 
He found himself tonight an observer to soft skin, a vulnerable but inviting form that seemed to master existing as is without striving for status-quo. And it was entrancing, desirable; sparked sensations in him he had put under wraps years ago as a teen. Useless instinct. Basic drive. He had more to expect from the world, and expected more, he did…but every night, went back to the same old scenario. Her. 
"Get out of my head," he groaned as he laid up in the quiet lair when he was supposed to be resting, lost in thought. Smooth curves. A small stature against his. Hands, running down—he paused. Somewhere in the middle of a fantasy, he'd heard the words "I love you". That brought him back to the fact that it wasn't just desire. For that there were things he felt embarrassed to indulge in sometimes; but it didn't help anymore. Because those people in the screens, the words on a page of an R-rated book, were not her. Couldn't be, even if he tried. He wanted to know for just a moment what it was like to be human. To have that possibility of love there for the taking. And to never go for it, with all the permission those men had just for being human, he was disgusted. Feeling bitter over that fact sent his mind into overdrive—because he would feel even worse if some man did go for it with her. Like a walking contradiction, he was fighting with himself every step of the way. From she should stay away, to she should be with me. 
He got up to practice some forms. Maybe do maintenance on his flexibility. Sharpen his katanas. Anything to stop thinking and start doing. Somewhere during his steady training, he heard Master Splinter enter. 
"What is the matter, my son?" asked Splinter. He always knew even when his more stoic child Leonardo was troubled. 
"What's the matter? Nothing's the matter. I'm fine," Leo replied, balancing on one leg. "[Y/N] should head home, it's almost time for patrol." 
Splinter sat cross-legged down on a cushion with a slight smile. "So quick to mention [Y/N], even when you're preoccupied," he commented, "I told her she was welcome to stay whenever she liked. To repay for her generosity." That generosity being, stocking their fridge with things they couldn't get a hold of, to help out the heroes of New York. Something along the lines of making sure they were eating right for all they did. 
Leo paused, "What? I'm not quick, I was just saying…Splinter, it's weird having someone around now." 
"Does not have to be 'weird'," Splinter said. Leo felt his black eyes on him even when turned around. He was flustered, still going through the smooth motions of his kata. "Tell me what is really going on, Leonardo. I know you have something on your mind." 
Giving up his rotations, Leo slumped a little as he stepped off of the pedestal, setting his katanas down as he faced his father. "I don't know what's up with me, Master. I just don't get it." 
Splinter gave a knowing hum. Still, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. "It seems like you've been quite bothered over [Y/N], my son."
He knew he couldn't hide anything from Splinter. There was no point in deflecting longer; he was only embarrassing himself. Finally, he admitted, "I can't…you know the way it is, Master, it'll never work. She's cool with us, but she's a human. And I'm a mutant." He sat down before his father on a plain mat. 
"Yes, a very beautiful human, too," the old rat mused, gently stroking the longer hairs of his chin. Leo flinched and opened his mouth to switch the focus of the conversation, but Splinter beat him to it. "Surely a woman like that would not ever spend money on, cook for, and give quite undivided attention to such a mutant when he's training. You are correct, my son, it's over." 
Leo's face flushed cold, blood rushing to his cheeks as he listened to his father. "Master Splinter! I'm being serious!" he fussed as he leaned forward onto his palms. "I don't know what to do, I—" 
"—want to stop feeling this way, yes, I know," Splinter finished for him. "Oh, young love." 
It was quiet for more than a moment. Leo's face softened, his blue eyes studying his father's as he gave Leo a look of acknowledgement. He gathered the courage stuck in his gut fluttering about his stomach, mind bouncing between [Y/N] and what his dad was saying. "I made myself stop thinking about love and stuff a long time ago. Mikey's always going on about it. I know Raph wants to be accepted more than anything, and Donnie, he's got his secrets. I'm supposed to be the example. I was supposed to show them we can live and not care. That our lives are worthwhile even without humans being involved. But now…" 
Splinter raised a brow at him. 
"I'm in love," Leo said. "And—and want it so badly." 
Splinter reached forward to place a hand on his shoulder. As soon as [Y/N] had entered their lives, he knew this day was going to come for one of his sons. It was inevitable, he thought. "Welcome to manhood, my son, this was fated to happen at some point. I've only been waiting since she arrived." 
Leo felt exposed. He felt unsure, and that uncertainty was driving him insane. He was always steadfast in his approach. Knowing he was a fish out of water in this situation disarmed him. 
"Master Splinter, what do I do? Tell me." 
Splinter's idle smile left as the tone turned  more serious suddenly, adding to Leo's growing discomfort. "You must understand that having [Y/N] means that your burden will grow. Not only will it be your brothers you will have to protect, but her, as well. It is your job to defend her from anything that could put her in harm's way. She is not built to fight like you. She is vulnerable, and being affiliated to us will only add to the dangers already present in this world. That is what you must come to terms with. But you must not ignore your heart, either." 
Having another body to look after. He contemplated that before answering. When he thought about defending her, it did not feel like an added chore. He wanted to. What was he so strong for if not to also protect the woman he loved? And what he had said before…could she have felt the same way? 
"You've prepared me more than enough to be able to handle another person, Master." 
He wanted nothing more than to hold her. That was something he could not deny. He enjoyed being an observer to a way of life so different from his; femininity, not always being the one taking care of others. He loved his family, but at times, leading was tiring. He wanted to forget about it for just a little bit, maybe lay down, be with someone he didn't have to "manage".
Splinter would have been lying to have said he wasn't surprised at all. But he knew his sons, inside and out—Leonardo had iron will. 
"It is your choice, Leonardo," Splinter said amiably. 
His choice? He wanted to laugh. There almost wasn't a choice. He felt like every road led back to her. It was either face his fears, or stay awake every night plagued with the possibilities of what could be. And he didn't handle fear well. It twisted his stomach and ate him up inside when he felt uncertain, afraid. God, one word is all I need from her. Just one "yes". One touch. One kiss.  He wanted to feel her hands explore his plastron, run along the edge of his shell. Love what made him, him. 
Overcoming the hesitance he felt, he let out a deep breath, committing to a final answer. " I don't know how, but...I want to try. I can't let this go. There has to be a reason all of this happened. If everything that's happened to us up until now has been destiny...I can believe it for this, too. Thank you, master."
Just felt like writing our leader in blue having a talk with his father 😌 Going to make this a little mini series for all the boys!
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hannibals-favourite-meal ¡ 5 months ago
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Congratulations on the milestone love✨🎉
For my request, 'walking in on the other' with Steve Rogers? Or with any marvel character, whatever you see fit!
Thank you 💙
.⋆。Midnight Swim。⋆.
Steve Rogers x plus size reader
Being on the run doesn’t exactly get you a comfortable life, but finally, there’s a chance for you to relax, if only you could find your swimsuit… or not
Warnings: skinny dipping, nudity (obvi), brief mentions of the events of Civil War, implied smut WC: 1.4k
6k Follower Celebration Bingo
Library- @hannibals-favourite-meal-library
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You ached, putting it lightly. Months of running from virtually every government on the planet didn’t exactly give you the luxury of relaxing or unwinding after a long day. The rooms you stayed in never had baths to soak in or even a comfy mattress to sink into so when Steve announced that the motel you were going to had not only a jacuzzi but also king sized beds, you thought you had died and gone to heaven. 
“I hope you don’t mind sleeping on the floor, gorgeous, cause I will be spread eagle on that bed.” Sam wrapped an arm around your shoulder as you climbed the cement steps up to the second floor. 
“Don’t worry about me birdie, that hot tub is calling my name.” You moaned, giving the man a light shove.
“We leave at sunup, don’t get too comfortable.” Steve’s voice broke the little bubble of happiness around the two of you. You looked back at the man, his brow was furrowed, the muscles in his jaw clenching. It wasn’t hard to see that he was different now; gone was the hopeful and starry eyed golden boy, instead you were left with a man who was only trying to survive in the face of complete betrayal of everything he held dear. Throw in a beard and a whole new uniform, Captain America was no more.
“C’mon Steve, we can afford a couple days of rest. We’re all exhausted.” Natasha laid a hand on his arm. “Besides, I think we all need to have a proper shower and do laundry.” You smiled gratefully at her as Steve sighed.
“Alright, just don’t draw too much attention to yourselves. Nat, how about you room with Sam?” 
“It’s my turn to get Y/L/N.” Sam stopped in front of the door to his room, shooting a puzzled look at you. Nat matched his expression but still stepped forward to take your spot next to the man. 
“We both know you’re gonna fall asleep immediately, just like Nat, and if Y/N is going down to the pool, someone needs to stay up to make sure she’s ok.” Steve shoved the key in the door, not bothering to even look in your direction. You met Sam’s gaze but he could only shrug at you as Nat wiggled her eyebrows.
Of course the woman knew about your crush on the ex-Captain, given that it was the one reason you had yet to room with him despite the rotating roommates you agreed to when you went on the run. Your stomach rolled as you tried to come up with any excuse to not walk in that room and have to face the reality of sharing a bed with the man who’s responsible for the mass ruining of your panties. 
The light in the room clicked on just as the door next to yours snapped shut. “Fuck me.” You hiked your duffle bag higher on your shoulder, took a deep breath and stepped inside.
Steve had already dropped his bag on the side of the bed closest to the door and shed the heavy jacket that shielded his toned physique from the world. He barely glanced at you as you entered but you knew his guard was still up, you doubted it had ever come down since what happened at the airport.
“You don’t have to wait up for me. No one else is staying here, the front desk guy said so himself.” You unzipped your bag. 
“It’s my job to look after you.” He retorted. You huffed and started pulling out your clothes in search of the singular bikini you had managed to obtain in your ‘travels’.
“Really? What’s your 401k look like?” Even without seeing it, you knew he was rolling his eyes at you. “Dammit.” You hissed as your fingers brushed the bottom of the bag, no trace of the thin material in sight. 
Steve turned from the desk where he had laid out a map of the area and raised an eyebrow at you. “I lost my swimsuit,” Your shoulders dropped in disappointment, “No hot tub for me I guess.” 
You shoved the empty bag and pile of clothes onto the floor before flopping down onto the bed. “This sucks.”
The desk chair creaked. “Just go in your underwear.”
Your head turned against the sheets, the thick cotton of the duvet brushing against your cheek. Steve was leaned forward, elbows planted firmly on his knees. Dark blue eyes stared right through you and suddenly, you couldn’t remember why you were upset. “Um, yeah I guess. But I don’t have any extra bras at the moment though.” You gestured to your discarded clothes.
Steve’s lip quirked up briefly before settling back into his now usual stern expression. “I’ll wash your stuff for you in the morning.” 
“Since when do you offer to do other people’s laundry?” Your hands slid up to rest beneath your head.
“I’ve been pushing all of you too hard. Maybe I want to start making it up to you.” He leaned back in the chair, the sheer mass of his seeming to grow as he rolled his broad shoulders. Unable to help yourself, you let your eyes trace the sharp muscles of his arms. It had been a long time since he was this relaxed in front of you.
“So maybe there is a bit of America’s Golden Boy still left in there.” He rolled his eyes and turned back to the desk.
“Go, before I change my mind.” You slinked off the bed with a smile. 
“Don’t wait up.” You cooed as the motel door shut behind you.
——————
The silence was a welcome friend. No cars or sirens, just the soft bubbling of the jets and your own happy groans as your body finally unwound. Steam billowed up from the water, disappearing into the night sky, brushing against the stars. The heat bled into your bones and it was all you could do to not melt.
You felt like you could wash away everything from this past year. 
You sank deeper into the water, the gentle ripples now brushed your neck, making you hum in satisfaction.
“Y/N, I was thinking that maybe I could grab some takeout from that 24 hour restaurant we passed a little while back, you hungry?” You lazily looked back over your shoulder just as Steve slipped past the high fence that enclosed the space. You watched as his gaze travelled from your body over to the pile of clothes on the deck, your panties and bra prominently displayed on top.
“Sure, I could eat.” You shrugged, swallowing down a smile at his now blank expression. Steve was frozen in place as the realisation dawned on him.
“Doll.” A shiver ran through you, that was definitely very new. A sudden confidence filled your veins as you watched his Adam's apple bob.
“Steven.” You turned around so that you were now kneeling on the bench, the water now barely covering your breasts. Blue eyes slowly trailed down from your face, following the droplets of water that clung to your skin. “Actually, now that I’m thinking about it, I don’t think I’m craving take out.”
The water lapped at your stomach as you sat up. Steve’s eyes immediately darted to your face as a deep blush crawled up his neck. “Doll, what is your underwear doing on the deck?” 
“I think that’s quite obvious Cap.” The muscles in his jaw rolled as his expression grew darker. Heat curled in your stomach. “I didn’t want to get them wet. Well, more wet than they already were.”
“It’s dangerous to be out here alone like this.” He took a tentative step towards you, the lock on the gate clicking shut. 
“Well then, it’s a good thing I have you here to protect me.” You sank back into the water, moving backwards until you could sit on the other side, giving yourself the perfect view of the super soldier. His jacket dropped first, then the ratty baseball cap that covered his darker hair. You bit your lip as his t-shirt followed.
There was a spattering of light hair across his chest, getting thicker and darker along his torso, until it disappeared beneath his pants. His hands interrupted your view but you wouldn’t complain, not when they were undoing his belt. You fought a moan as the button popped open and his fly was slowly drawn down. 
“You gonna join me Cap? The water is just perfect.” The dark material of his jeans slid down and you wondered if Commando was a better fitting title for the man. 
Steve smirked as he stepped into the tub. “I have to look out for you don’t I?” His hands grabbed at your wide hips and tugged you against his body effortlessly. “It is my job.”
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mymoodwriting ¡ 24 days ago
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Request for Anon (yandere professors New, Q, & Juyeon) 6.7k, yandere themes, possessive behavior, manipulation, special treatment, modeling, nude modeling, photography, blackmail, non-con, dub-con, drugs, foursome, gang bang, creampie, fingering, overstimulation, implied captivity (@starillusion13)
“You want me to be your model?”
You weren’t an art major, journalism actually, but every institution of higher education forced you to take other classes for your degree, so here you were. You thought an intro class for art would be a good elective and a break from your main courses. It wasn’t anything difficult and you thought you were doing well, that is until your professor, Choi Chanhee, pulled you aside and asked you to come see him later at his office. Your mind ran through all kinds of scenarios, wondering why the professor would want to see you in private.
To say you were nervous was an understatement, but you had to face this head on. You took a deep breath before knocking and stepping inside Professor Choi’s office. Your sense of calm immediately went out the window when you noticed two other professors in the room. You weren’t sure who they were off the top of your head, but you knew they were from the art department too. Now you definitely had no idea what was going on, but your professor was quick to notice your confusion and introduce the others. As well as tell you why he had called you here. The three of them had a job offer for you.
“Yes.” Professor Choi explained. “We believe you’d be a great model, and this would count as your class grade.”
“What does that mean?”
“If you model for us this semester I’ll give you a perfect A in your intro art class. And if you do it again next semester I believe Professor Ji Changmin could have it count as your volunteer work.”
“So you want me to model for a class grade and my volunteer hours?”
“We all think you’d be perfect for the role.” Professor Ji added. “I see great potential in you.”
“Uh, can I think about it? I’m not really sure I’m model material.”
“Of course. We do need an answer by the end of this week. If you decide to do it, please meet us in Professor Lee Juyeon’s classroom.”
“We’d need to start your training right away.” Professor Lee mentioned.”It’s nothing too rigorous, so take your time to think this over.”
“Thanks.”
You didn’t mind your art class. It wasn’t difficult, but of course you still had assignments to complete. When you first looked over the syllabus you saw mentions about going to the nearest art museum and botanical gardens for certain assignments. Those would likely be a whole day trip, and you might not have the time for that. Modeling didn’t sound like a bad idea. You’d likely just be wearing silly costumes and holding stuff while the students drew you from different angles. It would cover your class and it would only be a few hours a week at best.
You did think it over, and didn’t mention it to your friends either. In the end you figured you should give it a shot. You’d have more free time, and this new experience could have other benefits you hadn’t thought of yet. So at the end of the week you went to Professor Lee’s classroom. He was cleaning up and was very happy to see you. He welcomed you in, telling you to make yourself comfortable and he’d call over the other two. You looked around, seeing all the works of art hung around the room. They were quiet beautiful, showing different body types and you were amazed by the attention to detail.
“Are these your works?”
“Hm? Oh no, these are from past students. I have more, but these are the current ones on display in my rotation.”
“Wow. You’ve had a lot of talented individuals come through here.”
“And they will continue to do so. I’m glad you’ve decided to take us up on the job offer.”
“Honestly, it sounds like fun. It’s truly a once in a life time opportunity. I could be drawn by the next Picasso or something.”
“Indeed.”
A moment later the other two professors came in, happy to see you as well. The three gathered for a moment before putting their attention on you.
“Alright, let’s get a good look at you.” Professor Ji stated. “Up on the pedestal, please.”
You set your things down and stood on the pedestal in the center of the room. The three boys circled around you, looking you over and then reaching out to touch. They asked you to move your legs, to pose in certain ways. In the moment you felt like their doll.
“Very good.” Professor Choi complimented. “It will be easier to see what we’re truly working with once you disrobe, but that will be for another time.”
“I’m sorry, what?” You questioned. “Disrobe? You mean take my clothes off?”
“Yes.” Professor Lee continued. “I need you to be a nude model for some of my classes.”
“A nude model!?”
“I’m sorry, did we not make that clear? I know it sounds like a lot, but I promise you this position is not taken lightly. I have other nude models, but I am asking you to model for my graduate classes only, not any immature undergrads.”
“Oh… but…”
“Only three classes a week, two hours each. At least for this semester.”
“I…”
“The graduate students are very professional.” Professor Ji assured. “They’re just here to study human anatomy. They won’t be trouble.”
“… I don’t know…”
“Come by tomorrow so we can give you a proper test run. We’ll discuss the finer details, and you can see what you’re really in for. Please.”
“Uh… sure… sure…”
“Wonderful.”
You really were stunned over the news of this being a nude model gig, but you did want to at least see what the job truly entailed. So the next day you came by the art room again, even if you hesitated at the door. The three professors greeted you, happy to see you were still giving this a proper chance. Professor Lee showed you to the small room in the corner where you could undress. There was a wall mirror, a locker to put your things, as well as a clean robe for you to wear. For now you weren’t expected to be nude, but were asked to strip down to your panties and bra. You were a bit nervous but did as they asked, wrapping yourself up in the soft robe and stepping out in some slippers that had been provided.
“Excellent.” Professor Lee cheered. “Now I assure you, there are no cameras in this room. While in class the door is locked so no one can just come and go as they please. I also collect the phones from my grads and keep them in a box on my desk. The students who will be working with you are very professional and respectful.”
“Okay…”
“Let’s run a mock session then.”
The door was locked right in front of you, assuring you that no one would just walk in. Professor Lee lead you to the pedestal, helping you get on it. You removed your slippers, holding onto the robe, not wanting to take it off. They were patient with you, and the room wasn’t super cold. After a moment you took a breath and removed the robe, Professor Lee taking it from you. Instinctively you tried to cover yourself.
“You look beautiful.” Professor Ji assured. “But take your time.”
It took you a bit to ease your nerves, but eventually you lowered your hands. Once you were good the professors helped you get into a pose. Something simple, just a hand on your hip. From there the boys used tape to mark where you stood. Each of them then got a canvas and some brushes and pencils, finding a position around you to set up.
“For starters I just need you to hold that position for about thirty minutes, then we’ll take a break.” Professor Choi said. “Can you do that?”
“I think so.”
“Good.”
At first there was this awkward silence, but then the professors began talking with you. They asked about your classes, and how things were going for you. They wanted to know about you, the things you did in your free time, and why you were pursuing your career of journalism. 
“Information is dangerous but important, and wonderful. I want to be able to share that, so people can make good decisions and share stories.”
“That’s very cute.” Professor Lee chuckled. “Ah, keep still.”
“Sorry…”
“It’s okay. Standing still is difficult, but you’re doing well so far.”
“Thank you.”
After thirty minutes Professor Lee came to your side with your robe, helping you put it on and get into your slippers. You walked over to see what they had been working on, rather stunned to see how they had captured your form. It was beautiful, which was to be expected, these guys are professors in the art department of course.
“For an actual session I can’t really have the students conversing with you.” Professor Lee explained. “I can play some calm music in the room, or if you prefer you can use your own earbuds while posing.”
“I understand professor.”
“You don’t need to be so formal with us. You can just call me Juyeon.”
“Alright, although I’m still not sure I can do this completely naked…”
“You’re doing well so far. I’d ask you to at least do two sessions for one of my classes. If you don’t wish to continue after that, I’ll get another model. Is that possible?”
“Uh… I think so…”
“I’m glad to hear.”
After your little break you got back on the pedestal, the boys telling you to move a little bit here and there as you got back into position. The rest of the session went well, the boys showering you with compliments as they continued to ask about you. By the end you didn’t feel so shy, but then again you weren’t completely naked before strangers. Still, you would give this a real shot, so Juyeon gave you the time for the class he wanted you to model for. Excited to see you then.
🖤
The day for your real modeling session you were incredibly nervous, but you wanted to keep your word and not back out last minute. You arrived early to the class, and Juyeon was very happy to see you. Just like before you got into your little dressing room and stripped. You took a moment to look at yourself in the mirror, wearing only your bra and panties. You had to fully undress and you believed in yourself. After a moment you took off the last bit of clothing you had, putting on the dress robe and slippers. You had brought some earbuds, wanting to get lost in your own world and not hear anything you didn’t want to.
When the time came Juyeon knocked on the door, linking his arm with yours and leading you to the pedestal. The students were all setting up, getting out their tools, every space around you occupied by someone. Juyeon gave you an assuring look as you got on the pedestal, letting you disrobe on your own. You kept your eyes on him for the time being, letting him touch you as he got you into an ideal pose. He marked your position and then you were on your own. Besides the music you weren’t sure what else to do with yourself until you noticed something on the wall. It seemed to be some sort of puzzle, and it did well to pass the time.
At break time Juyeon approached you with the robe, helping you down. The students were also on break. Some remained in the class, others stepped out for a moment. Even though it was only the beginning you wanted to see what the students had done so far. You walked around the room with Juyeon, seeing the rough outline of your body from all kinds of angles. It was incredible, and you found it so beautiful. This was you, regardless of the angle. There weren’t any sort of identifying features either, yet every student was taking great care in drawing you and it brought a smile to your face.
All the students were back before the end of break and then you got back to your position. The students politely helped with directions this time as they knew what they were drawing. Then you were back on your little eye puzzle, which Juyeon admitted to placing for you so you don’t get so bored. When the second break came around you checked on the work, seeing the progress they had made. It was the small details they were really working towards, which was really good. Even if you had continued with your original art class, you weren’t sure you could ever get on their level.
“You’ve been doing very well.” Juyeon complimented. “I appreciate you being here.”
“Me too. I’m not so nervous anymore and this job is… interesting…I think I’ll be able to keep doing this.”
“I’m glad to hear.”
You finished up the session, a few of the students thanking you for your time. You went to get dressed, honestly feeling a bit strange putting clothes back on after just being naked for two hours. Once you had gathered all your things you stepped out, seeing Juyeon chatting with a student. You thought about leaving but he told you to stay a moment, so you did. Soon enough it was just the two of you and Juyeon began cleaning up the room, which you helped him do despite his protests.
“Ah, that reminds me.”
Juyeon went over to his desk, pulling out an envelope and handing it to you. At first you were confused, but then you realized what was inside.
“Oh, no, no, no, I can’t take this. I’m doing this for my class credits.”
“I know, this is from me personally. I pay all my models, and besides, it really is unfair to have you model for me and not pay you. Please, take it.”
“Just this once?”
“Well, we still have more sessions to come.”
“I…”
“You deserve it. I’ll be seeing you later this week, right?”
“Yes.”
“And you have the semester schedule?”
“I do.”
“Good. Until next class.”
“Until then.”
You continued with the modeling job, still trying to refuse Juyeon’s money, but at least you got him to lower the amount. It was nice to have some extra spending money for your studies though, making it easier to focus on assignments and projects. You of course did check your grades for your art class, seeing that Chanhee was marking them all as passed with an A, maybe a high B here and there, not waiting to make things weird, but also not harming your GPA. Being a nude model certainly wasn’t so nerve wrecking anymore, which made the sessions all the easier. Things were going smoothly until they got a bit complicated.
“Uh… hi…”
“Hm? Oh, hello, do I know you?”
“Well, kinda…”
After a session someone outside the classroom caught your attention. They didn’t seem familiar, but also weren’t entirely a stranger.
“You’ve modeled for a few of my classes now and I was wondering if I could get your name? Perhaps your number?”
“Sunwoo, aren’t you supposed to be in class right now?”
“Huh? Oh, hi Professor Ji. My current class was actually canceled and-”
“You should be studying for exams, nout lounging around the art department. Go on now.”
“Uh, yes, professor.”
Sunwoo glanced back at you, giving you an apologetic smile before heading off. Now it was just you and Changmin.
“You didn’t have to scold him like that.”
“I did. It’s not appropriate for any students to try and form a relationship with you. They’ve seen you without clothes on in a very vulnerable state.”
“Ah, I see.”
“It’s advice I hope you follow.”
“I think I will.”
“Now I know you just stepped out of Juyeon’s classroom, but do you mind if we go back in? There is something I’d like to discuss with the both of you.”
“Yeah, sure.”
You were curious what Changmin wanted to discuss, but you thought it was related to school. In fact it wasn’t as Changmin was talking about taking you out to dinner to celebrate you and congratulating you on your work. Of course the semester wasn’t over, but you were around the halfway point. You tried telling them this wasn’t necessary, but they insisted so there was really no denying them. The restaurant wasn’t anything super fancy, but rather nice. You dressed in business casual attire, stuff for interviews, since you didn’t have anything else. After ordering you began asking the three about their own careers and how they got into the arts and teaching.
Chanhee was big on portraits and color theory, enjoying teaching a few intro classes as he can see how other students interpret the world and the colors it has. You probably would have enjoyed his class, but you did like the spare time one less class gave you. Juyeon focused more on human anatomy and capturing moments in one’s day to day life. He had a handful of models, both nude and dressed, that he kept in contact with for his classes. He was very serious with his work and he only taught grad students. Then there was Changmin, a photographer. His classes were mainly open electives for other majors, but he loved teaching others how to use a camera to the fullest to take captivating images. They were all passionate in their area, and you admired that about them.
“You know, you could be a real model.” Chanhee mentioned. “Not a nude model, but a runway model.”
“That sounds crazy. I’m not a real model.”
“We’re serious.” Changmin added. “I have my own personal studio not far from campus. We could help you build a proper portfolio.”
“Even if you don’t want to shoot for a runway model, there are plenty of other jobs you can take on.” Juyeon added. “Commercial shoots, or magazine ads. A pretty face like yours would certainly be wanted. You should consider it.”
“I’ll keep it in mind.”
After dinner they took you back to your dorm, wishing you a good night. It wasn’t super late but you were still quiet as to not wake your roommate. You undressed and washed up for the night, crawling into bed. Dinner had been good, and so were the conversations. You really were intrigued by the idea of modeling on a more professional level. You wouldn’t feel guilty about the money made from real modeling jobs and it wouldn’t hurt to build up some savings before you graduate and dive into your career. It would be a good side hustle and money maker since getting a job as soon as you graduate wasn’t a common thing. It really wasn’t a bad idea.
🖤
The next time you had a free moment you went to search for Changmin, letting him know you did want to try modeling professionally. He was overjoyed to hear, setting up a good time for you to come down to his studio and take some professional shots. It was best to do this over the weekend, and you brought a bag of some of your clothes. You’d need a variety of shots taken, although the studio wasn’t what you expected. It was a full on professional studio that had its own employees and ran while Changmin was teaching. You had also never seen a studio like this before. Changmin was flattered you brought your own things, but he had options for you.
There was a room in the studio filled with clothes of all types. He went with you to pick out some outfits for your portfolio, knowing what he wanted to capture about you. Of course it wasn’t just going to be the two of you as Chanhee and Juyeon stopped by as well. Your scheduled time was later in the evening after all, and it would surely continue after business hours. Chanhee and Juyeon were more than happy to help you with make-up and accessories, making you look incredible. You weren’t one for getting dolled up, but you were certainly seeing a new side of your own beauty.
Once you were ready the photoshoot began. Changmin was happily behind the camera, treating you like a real model and encouraging you to do your own thing. He gave a few directions here and there, the other two giving suggestions as well. Overall the experience was fun, and certainly a once in a lifetime thing if this modeling didn’t go anywhere. You looked over the photos with the others, amazed at how good Changmin was at his job. He said he would pick out the good photos and do some edits to build your portfolio. He’d want you to look at it when he was done, and if you were satisfied with it he could reach out to some companies and start working on getting you some gigs. So you were quite excited to see what would come of this.
When the portfolio was done Changmin sent you a message, telling you he had left a physical copy for you in Chanhee’s hands. From there you reached out to Chanhee, agreeing to meet with him after one of his classes in order to pick up your portfolio. It was a little weird going into his classroom as students left, you hadn’t been there since the beginning of the semester. You waited for Chanhee to finish talking with a few students, so you looked around the room. You saw a few new pieces on the wall, wondering about their creator.
“I must admit, it’s nice to have you in my classroom again.”
“I could have remained as your student.”
“You’re doing better as Juyeon’s model. Now, your portfolio.” Chanhee grabbed a file from his desk, handing it to you. “If there are some you don’t want, let Changmin know. We’re all eager to see your career grow.”
“This is more of a side job than career. It never hurts to make money.”
“You do have a point.”
“Alright then, I’ll be off. I have a class to get to.”
“I’ll see you later.”
“Yup.”
On your way out of the classroom you checked the time, seeing you had half an hour before you had to be somewhere else. You opened up the file, seeing the pictures you had taken, once again reminded Changmin was a good photographer.
“You’re y/n, aren’t you?”
“Huh? Do I know you?” 
“We’re in the same class, or at least we’re supposed to be.”
“What? I don’t understand.”
“Me neither. Your name is still registered as part of Professor Choi’s intro class despite the fact you haven’t attended in the last couple weeks. You’re even getting grades, that’s odd don’t you think?”
“And what’s your problem?”
“Are you sleeping with the professor?”
“What the fuck is wrong with you!?”
“So I’m right.”
“You-”
“What is the commotion out here?” Chanhee stepped out of his classroom. “What are you two yelling about? There are other classes in progress.”
“I’m just concerned about one of my fellow classmates. It’s my duty to maintain the university’s reputation.”
“I don’t see why yelling at another does that. You should focus on your own studies, but if something troubles you then report it with the department administrator.”
“I will.”
The girl turned around and stormed off. You were still shocked over her words, but now you were worried about what she would tell the administrator. The modeling in exchange for a grade probably wasn’t sanctioned.
“Shouldn’t you have said something else? She’s gonna tell the administrator and get you in trouble.”
“She won’t.”
“Chanhee-”
“Don’t you know who the administrator is?”
“Uh… no, this isn’t my-”
“It’s Changmin.”
“Oh… that actually explains a lot…”
“So don’t worry about that girl, let’s just focus on your future modeling career.”
“Sure.”
After looking through the portfolio photos you messaged Changmin with a few suggestions but gave him the go ahead to send your information out there to see if anyone was interested. You honestly didn’t expect to get anything, but a few days later Changmin mentioned  a potential modeling job. Of course everything was still your choice, so he was just giving you the details. Honestly the money wasn’t bad, and these were all small jobs, so you did what came up. Some were easier than others, and some didn’t involve showing your face. Overall the side job was fun, and you always had one of the three boys accompanying you.
Although as exams and the end of the semester was approaching, you had to decline a few here and there. You needed the time to yourself to study, and still do your original job for Juyeon’s classes. Things were going well, and you felt that you had a pretty good balance in your life. If you kept this up you’d be in a good position come graduation. Of course you were stressed but not as much as you could be. After your last session of the week with Juyeon you hung around his classroom, helping him clean up. It had become a habit and it was a little moment where you could focus on a small task and not your own grades.
“You’ve really gotten better with modeling.”
“Thanks. I’ve gotten better with practice.”
“You have, although you haven’t been doing many modeling jobs as of late.”
“I have to focus on my studies.”
“Why? A pretty face like you doesn’t need brains.”
“… uh, what?”
“You’re better off as a model, than a little journalist. If you really focus on modeling you could be on a runway in months.”
“…”
You were rendered speechless, not sure if this was actually happening right now. Juyeon’s words couldn’t be real but either way, you needed to leave. You grabbed your things, getting his attention, so he quickly went over to you, grabbing your arm and preventing you from leaving.
“Hey, where are you going?”
“Let go.”
“I was planning dinner for all of us tonight.”
“I’m good, now let go!”
“What-”
“I said let go!”
You yanked your arm free and stormed towards the door, only to watch it open it on its own. Chanhee and Changmin walked in, smiles on their faces, until they sensed the tension in the air and saw your expression.
“What’s wrong?” Changmin asked. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing.” You stammered. “I was just leaving.”
“What about dinner?”
“I’m not hungry.”
“Come on, dinner won’t hurt.” Juyeon said.
“…”
“Y/n, what happened?” Chanhee questioned. “You don’t-”
“I told her she’d be better off as a model.” Juyeon admitted. “I guess she didn’t like that.”
“…”
“It’s not a bad idea.” Changmin added. “You’ve been-”
“I don’t want to model, I quit.”
You tried to walk away, but Chanhee held you back this time. You didn’t wanna argue anymore, but when you tried to free yourself Chanhee’s grip only got tighter. 
“What about your grades? The semester isn’t over yet. If you insist on quitting, I’m afraid I’ll have to fail you.”
“What… you know what, I don’t care, I’ll take the F.”
Before you tried to free yourself again you heard the door lock, seeing Changmin do just that. Now you were starting to get nervous, getting the sense that something else was going on here. Still, you tried to get your arm free but Chanhee wouldn’t budge.
“You know, we could destroy your career right here, right now.”
“Huh? What are you talking about?”
“What place would hire some fresh out of uni journalism student who has nude photos of themselves all over the internet.” Juyeon stated. “I think that’s a pretty big career killer.”
“There are no cameras in here!”
“I lied. You really think I wouldn’t want to remember some of my most beautiful models? Although my favorite images come from the dressing room.”
You felt your heart sink at his words. Maybe he was lying about everything, you couldn’t even imagine where a hidden camera would be. Although those thoughts were quickly squashed.
“Even if I didn’t have cameras in my classroom, I could get such beautiful images tonight.”
“I…”
“Be a good girl, and strip.”
You didn’t move, you didn’t speak. Your mind was racing and you were processing. Still, your lack of action was annoying them. So Chanhee pulled you towards the center of the room, the other two approaching and starting to undress you. Out of instinct you fought back only to get shoved down onto the floor, pinned as you ended up in your bra and panties. To a degree you were used to the nudity, but not like this. You covered yourself as best as you could, pulling up your knees to your chest when the boys stepped away.
“Don’t… don’t do this…”
“We were working towards it.” Changmin admitted. “We all make such a great team, don’t we?”
“I… I’ll finish the semester just…”
“We know you will, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have some fun.”
“This… this isn’t necessary…”
“Come on, you can’t tell me you haven’t had this kind of fantasy before.” Chanhee teased. “A lot of students fantasize about their professors. We’re all adults here, it’s okay.”
“No… no, I-”
“No one’s gonna bother us.” Juyeon assured, going to his desk. “The week is over, and you know how uni students are.”
Juyeon came into view, kneeling down before you with a small circular thin in hand. You had no idea what it was, but he had a rather pleased smile on his face.
“This is special for you, a personal mix I’ve been working on.”
“Huh?”
Juyeon opened up the tin, holding it out to you. It wasn’t empty, a strange blue colored liquid inside. He held it out closer to you, and then you caught a whiff of it. The smell was odd and began to make you dizzy. You grabbed your head, noticing that the world was spinning. Before you collapsed Changmin caught you, standing behind you.
“There, now she’ll cooperate.”
“What exactly is in that?” Chanhee asked.
“It’s a secret.”
Changmin gently laid you down, kneeling beside you and caressing your cheek. You were starting to feel hot, and his cool touch was welcomed. You leaned into him, getting a chuckle out of him.
“She is very cute. I was looking forward to dinner, but this is a good substitute. You’re sure she’ll behave?”
“She’ll be begging for us once we get started.” Juyeon said. “Don’t worry.”
“Who’s going first?”
“I call dibs.”
Chanhee was already slipping out of his shirt, getting on top of you and placing wet kisses on your face, then trailing down your chest. You moved to get him off of you, but you had no strength to push him away. His lips provided a soothing sensation, so really, you didn’t want him to stop. After a moment he pulled you up to sit, his hands reaching to unhook your bra and help you slip out of it.
“I made a good choice, didn’t I?”
“Is that why you get to go first?” Changmin pouted. 
“Jealous much? As if you haven’t been photographing her on your own. Won’t share the pictures.”
“I deserve to have some things for myself. Juyeon doesn’t share his videos of the dressing room.”
“My cameras, my videos.”
“I’ll share.” Chanhee chuckled. “She’s too pretty not to see someone else ruin her.”
While peppering you with kisses Chanhee latched on to one of your breasts, sucking on the nipple and teasing with his teeth. You cried out in ecstacy, a new feeling taking over your senses. This wasn’t your first time, but a new experience. When Chanhee pulled back there was a loud pop, followed by fingers between your legs, rubbing you through your panties. You whimpered once before you bit your lip, not wanting to be so nosy and needy.
“It’s okay baby.” Juyeon cooed, pulling you into a soft kiss. “We want to hear everything. No need to worry about anyone else.”
“… uh… my head…”
“Sh, it’s okay, we got you.”
“She’s so wet.” Chanhee giggled. “I can’t wait much longer.”
You barely registered Chanhee’s words before he pushed your panties aside and pressed his fingers against your folds. You squirmed, trying to move away, but Juyeon kept you from running. You felt Chanhee’s fingers pushing deeper, and one slipping inside you. Your mouth hung open in sweet pleasure, Changmin taking it as an invitation to put two of his own fingers in there, moving around your tongue and getting you to suck on them. You did so without really thinking, your focus pulled in two directions. Then you felt hands trailing down your chest, grabbing your breasts and massaging them. 
While you were distracted with that a second finger entered you, making you squirm once more as Chanhee found your sweet spot. He was more than happy to abuse it, making you moan against Changmin’s fingers, partially gagging. You didn’t really notice when a third finger was added but you could feel the stretch. Juyeon placed kisses against your neck, his hot breath sending shivers down your spine. The world around you was spinning, but you were more focused on the pleasurable feelings you were being assaulted with. Instinctively you let out a whimper when Chanhee moved his fingers, feeling cold for a moment before you felt something bigger rubbing against your slit.
Your mind only registered what that was once it was pushing your walls apart, entering you inch by inch. You felt a bit tense, but slowly relaxed, the pain mixing to pleasure. The fingers in your mouth pulled away with a pop, letting your moans spill past your lips. Those wet fingers trailed down your body, making you twitch, which just created a new sensation from the cock inside you. A whimper escaped you as you adjusted for the size. For a moment you noticed Chanhee’s face right in front of you, a big smile on his face. Then he started moving and things got blurry. Chanhee moved with a steady rhythm at first, making your whole body shake.
You shut your eyes, hands exploring his chest, trying to get some stability, but you were getting lost. Each of his thrusts rubbed against your sweet spot, keeping you off balance and on cloud nine. Chanhee shoved the others away from you, meaning down to kiss your neck and chest, wanting to leave marks. You felt a heat building down below, only growing stronger and stronger. You tried to say something to Chanhee, but he understood well. As he pushed you over the edge he pressed his lips to yours, letting you moan into his mouth. Your body shook beneath him, squeezing him tight and encouraging him to spill his seed.
You were barely coming down from your high when you heard, and felt, Chanhee pushed off of you. Juyeon wanted to take advantage of your sensitive state, and it wasn’t up for debate. You didn’t feel empty for long before something else just as big and hard slipped inside, pushing against Chanhee’s mess and having it spill out of you. A ragged moan escaped your lips as you adjusted to the change and the sensation. You were still twitching and aching but Juyeon was desperate. As soon as he was settled in he began moving, rocking your body as he used you to satisfy himself. You whimpered and wrapped your arms around him, holding on and moaning into his ears. He felt so good, hitting your sweet spot with every thrust just like Chanhee had done. It wasn’t too hard for him to force another orgasm out of you.
You cried out when you felt your body shake once more, wanting to rest, but Juyeon wasn’t done yet. He used your limp body to reach his own orgasm, adding to the mess between your legs. You felt the warm sticky substance spill down your thighs, the scent of sex filling the air. You thought you could actually rest, but there was someone who had patiently been waiting and watching you with such a predatory gaze. Juyeon peppered you with soft kisses before moving away, leaving you in Changmin’s hands. He caressed your body, enjoying the extra sensitivity. As he touched your breasts, as his fingers trailed down your chest, you gasped and moaned, every little thing getting a reaction out of you.
He teased you until his fingers got down to your core, pushing into the sloppy mess and mixing it all around. Your sense of self was long gone by then, and you just wanted more. You started to whimper, gently moving your hips, and Changmin understood your actions. He chuckled, promising that he’d take good care of you. One moment you were softly begging, the next you were yanked off of the ground and found yourself sitting atop something big and hard. A surprised moan came out of you, making you throw your head back. Perhaps he was in deeper, but you just wanted friction. You moved slowly, trying to get yourself off, but you were so tired, yet so desperate. Changmin let you play with his cock for a while, watching you fondly before grabbing your hips and helping you out.
He thrusted up into you, letting the mess between your legs spill onto him. Incoherent mumbles spilled out your lips as Changmin fired up your sensitive places. Once he got into a good rhythm he laid you back down, wanting to rub his thumb against your swollen clit, absolutely planning to wring another orgasm out of you, one just for him. You cried out when you reached climax, this one making you go completely limp. You couldn’t even relax until Changmin came, spilling into you and happily thrusting his hips as he got his seed in deeper. He placed gentle kisses on your face, telling you how good of a girl you had been, but you couldn’t register much. You were spent, body and mind, and couldn’t help but slip into the unconscious. 
🖤
You groaned as you began to regain your senses, feeling sore, your body aching all over. There was a chill in the air, and you realized you were still naked, but had some cloth draped over you. When you opened your eyes you looked around the room, seeing that you were still in Juyeon’s classroom. You had no idea how much time had passed, but you did try to get up.
“Don’t move, we’re not done yet.”
You looked around for the voice, but struggled to find it. You needed a moment more to have the strength to move. You tried again only to have a hand on your chest and getting pushed back down. Chanhee was still very much naked, but he had a pleased grin on his face.
“I said stay still, love, we’re painting, and you can’t be moving. Be a good model and just close your eyes and rest.”
Chanhee placed a cloth over your eyes, and the darkness just made it all the easier to go back to sleep, but you fought it. You couldn’t move much even if you wanted to, but you didn’t want to give up. Despite what you remembered, the soreness on your body told you more was done to you. So you just laid there, not fully aware of the other three around the room, happily painting your portrait from different angles.
“… please… can I go home…”
“Hm, what are we going to do with her now?” Juyeon asked. “We can’t just let her go.”
“I’ll take her back to my place.” Chanhee volunteered. “Take care of her as she recovers.”
“As if you won’t do more than that.”
“You’re more than welcome to visit, although don’t you still need her for modeling?”
“I can figure something out, but we need to do something about her.”
“Students drop out and disappear all the time.” Changmin reminded. “I’ll take care of that.”
“Oh, I like that.” Chanhee giggled. “I really did choose a good one, didn’t I?”
“The best one, perhaps the last one.”
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junixscribble ¡ 24 days ago
Text
Late Nights
This is potentially the first of many (I am rotating them in my head - please talk to me lol)
Title: Late Nights
WC: 1027w
Summary: Viktor is being stubborn, and Jayce employs desperate measures.
——————
“V, it’s two in the morning. Surely we call it now.” Jayce wiped his forehead with his arm, dropping his spanner and looking over to his partner. Viktor didn’t even look up from his project.
“I’m sure I’m close to something. I just need a little more time…”
“You said that an hour ago. And then an hour before that. This will still be here in the morning.”
“It is the morning already, no? Therefore a new day has started, and I have even more time than anticipated.”
Jayce could hear the grin in Viktor’s voice - he loved to be pedantic about words. Sighing, he abandoned his post and walked over to Viktor’s chair. He observed him carefully manoeuvring instruments around the hexcore, intently focused. Jayce felt his mind wander as he felt the tiredness for the first time. His hand slipped off the back of the chair to Viktor’s crutch, knocking it to the ground and making him jump.
Viktor pushed his goggles to his forehead. “Jayce! That broke my concentration, I almost had it!”
“No you didn’t.”
“How do you know?”
Jayce yawned, leaning on the back of the chair. “When you’re actually close to figuring something out, you have a face for it. A figured-out face.”
Viktor sputtered. “What- no I don’t!”
Jayce just raised his eyebrows. “You do. So, are we calling it a day?”
Viktor narrowed his eyes, studying Jayce for a minute before going back to his work with an amused smile. “No. You may go, but I will stay.”
Jayce let his head fall to the side. He was fucking around now, and he was gonna find out.
“Well, if that’s how you’re gonna be, I’m going to have to resort to making you.”
Viktor scoffed. “Good luck- whoa!”
Jayce wrapped his arms around Viktor and pulled him up out of the chair, half dragging him away from his work. Viktor yelled and pushed at his arms in response, kicking out weakly.
“Jayce, this is madness and undignified!”
Jayce adjusted his grip and Viktor squirmed, making a choked noise and throwing himself to the side. An idea suddenly popped into his head.
“You want undignified? I’ll show you undignified.”
With that, Jayce took most of Viktor’s weight with one arm and used the other to prod at his side. Viktor let out a high pitched yelp and started thrashing with more vigour than Jayce thought possible. He didn’t laugh, not yet, but there was absolutely no doubt that his poking tickled pretty badly.
Jayce stopped dragging him, opting instead to kneel and pin Viktor to the floor, temporarily providing relief. Viktor’s chest heaved from trying to escape, but with his arms pinned all he could do was glare at Jayce.
“What the hell was that?” Viktor complained, flushed. Jayce laughed.
“Are you going to bed now? I think you know what will happen if you don’t.”
Viktor mumbled something foreign under his breath and struggled a little before giving up.
“This is cruel considering my condition, Jayce.”
Jayce loosened his grip, thinking he’d won, but the minute Viktor could move he used a hand to grab onto his rib cage and squeeze, making Jayce burst out laughing.
“Oh, you little shit I’m gonna get you now.”
Viktor’s self satisfied grin was lost when Jayce quickly pinned both his arms above his head with one hand, the other aiming to skitter up Viktor’s side. He had a moment to try and squirm away before the fingers touched down and all hope was lost.
“Oh no no no-!” Viktor repeated, immediately dissolving into cackles. Jayce laughed triumphantly, hand crawling up and down Viktor’s ribs like a spider. He nudged his fingers between the bones of his ribs and wiggled, and that made Viktor shriek.
“Ha! I had no idea you were this ticklish!” Jayce teased, counting up Viktor’s ribs until he was a giggly, squirmy mess.
“Plehease!” Viktor managed amidst laughter, arching his back which only made Jayce’s tickling worse.
Jayce released his arms and Viktor though he had freedom, but that other hand just slipped under his shirt to tickle him even more, fluttering over his stomach before scuttling up to his ribs to join the torture. Viktor’s freed arms could do absolutely nothing against Jayce, who he was quickly discovering was a force of nature when it came to tickling. He tried to resist as best he could, but it had been so long since someone had dared try this on him and he was not handling it well.
Recognising his defeat, he let his head fall back and laughed freely, giving up on his efforts to stop the curious hands.
“Ahallright! I will stop! Jahayce, it tickles!”
Jayce finally let up on his victim, drawing his hands over his bare tummy one last time to get a giggle out of him.
“Still alive?” Jayce asked, and Viktor glared at him.
“Alive? You just about killed me!”
Jayce grinned and cocked his head, teasing. “No. If I wanted to truly turn you into a puddle I could have held you still and blown raspberries on your tummy. I could still do that-“
Viktor quickly moved to protect his stomach, scooching out from under Jayce. “No! No, you have tormented me enough today.”
“Are you sure? There’s no shame in wanting more - it sounded like you were begging for it before.”
Viktor turned bright red, stammering on his words and sitting up. “I did not- what are you-“
Jayce chuckled and put a hand on Viktor’s shoulder. He flinched, but relaxed when he realised Jayce wasn’t going to tickle him again. The hand moved to cradle his cheek and Viktor unconsciously leaned into it, yawning. This time it was Jayce’s turn to blush, and he drew his hand away after a moment.
“Anyway. We should get some sleep.” Jayce stood and offered a hand to Viktor, which he took. “Is the heating in your apartment still broken?”
Viktor sighed. “Yes. My landlords are… useless, is the kindest word I could use.”
“My place?”
“Mhm. If I wake up to you cuddling in your sleep again, I’ll obliterate you.”
“Sure you will.”
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celiastjamesoscar ¡ 1 year ago
Text
Wish I Knew You
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Pairings: Sam Carpenter x fem!reader, established relationship
Summary: Unofficial meant many things to people, but to college students it meant one thing: party. But unofficial takes a turn when you get into a fight, and Sam has to walk you home.
Warnings: swearing, destruction of property, breaking and entering, light mention of drugs, drinking
AN: based off of an idea I ‘stole’ from @p0rkbun, I love ya!
My Masterlist
Word Count: 3.5K
“I know it’s unofficial, but please, you guys, be safe. Okay?” Sam pleaded as she looked at the group of kids before her. Technically, they weren’t kids, but in her eyes, most of them would still be those kids she used to babysit. Well, all of them but you.
You met Sam through Anika after she moved to New York, and you were instantly in love even though she wouldn’t even spare you a glance most of the time. Those big, brown eyes that held years of pain and agony brought you so much comfort whenever she would look at you. Her lips never smiled, so you made it your life mission to make her smile, even if it was just for a mere moment. And when you did make her smile after you went on a drunken tangent about how Isaac Newton deserved to die a virgin and how Dr. Pepper is the best soda, she knew that she was in too deep.
Dammit to hell with getting accepted into the best universities the country had to offer and all those scholarships you had received that paid for your schooling at Blackmore University. None of those things compared to the feeling you got in your chest when you saw that beautiful smile for the first time. It seemed like your entire world had stopped rotating and began to revolve around the single smile that didn’t last for more than three seconds, but it meant more to you than anything else.
After the night, the two of you grew closer, and after enough dinners together, you two started dating. It took you forever to break down all of Sam’s walls, but when you did, it was the most rewarding thing you had ever done. On late nights after she had worked a double, the only thing Sam wanted to do was come home and sleep. But when she pushed open her apartment door and saw you standing awkwardly in the hallway with a goofy grin on your lips and a bottle of wine, all the stress seemed to leave her body, being replaced with the need to be hold you.
You found it impossible to believe that people hated Sam: she was perfect in your eyes. Her soft, caring nature, whenever it was just the two of you, was something you couldn’t find anywhere else. Yes, Sam can be a bitch sometimes, but behind closed doors, she is putty in your hands. How she would sit next to you on the couch, softly tracing patterns on your thigh with her fingers, would make your chest flutter. When you two were in a group, she would always sit next to you- much to Tara’s disapproval, who is someone who doesn’t like sharing her sister- while placing a protective hand on your thigh.
The thoughts that ran around Sam’s mind were that she wished she knew you when she was young; maybe her life would be completely different. Perhaps she wouldn’t have started using drugs or ran away from home, but that’s all it was: what-ifs that might or might not have changed her life. Even though she wished for things to have been different, that she wished she would have met you at a different time, she was still glad that she had you in her life, and she refused to let you go any time soon.
So now, as you sit next to her sister getting ready to get plastered at frat parties for Halloween, Sam couldn’t help the overwhelming feeling of anxiety crawling through her body.
“Yes, Sam, we promise to be safe. We will call you if you need anything,” Tara stated as she stood up from the couch, “Can we go now?”
With a small sigh, Sam closed her eyes and nodded her head. She just knew that allowing you guys to go out tonight would come back to bite her in the ass. “Please don’t drink too much,” Sam pleaded as she followed the group to the door, looking directly at you while she spoke, “I’m talking to you.”
You scoffed at your girlfriend’s accusation, “How dare you insinuate that I, of all people, would drink the most!”
“Because you will,” Mindy mumbled as she looked between you and Sam, unamused, “You always get out of hand when you drink.”
“No, I do not!” You shot back, but you knew arguing would get you nowhere.
Speaking up for the first time, Chad said, “Don’t worry, Sam. I will make sure that Y/N and Tara don’t drink too much; you have my word,” as he wrapped a loving arm around your shoulder.
With a small sigh, Sam nodded in defeat, “Alright, just be safe tonight, okay? No splitting up.” Before Sam could finish her sentence, Tara had shot up from the couch and left for the door. “Come on, you old people, the party’s not going to wait for us,” she exclaimed while opening the door and leaning against the door frame, tapping her foot with urgency.
The twins were quickly behind Tara, and when you went to follow, Sam grabbed your hand, “Hey, wait a minute.” When Sam spoke, the three noticed the way Sam’s dark eyes were pleading with you, so they decided to step out into the hallway to give the two of you some privacy.
“What’s up?” You asked with the softest smile that always made Sam’s knees weak. “Please, Y/N, be safe tonight. If you need anything, call me, okay?” The Latina asked as she gently placed her hands on your triceps, lovingly running her hands up and down.
“You know I will be, and I promise to call you if anything happens,” you replied while leaning forward, placing a soft kiss on top of Sam’s head, “Just think, this is a night to yourself. When was the last time you had that?”
Sam mumbled something underneath a breath that you missed. “I’m sorry, what was that?” You teased with a smile, watching as Sam rolled her eyes. “I said that I only enjoy my nights to myself when you are around,” the older girl admitted through clenched teeth.
“Damn, Sam. You can at least pretend to like me,” you joked with a small laugh.
“You know that I hate to admit these things, but you still make me do it.”
“You’re right! I love hearing my girlfriend give me constant affirmations about how much she loves me; it's the best!” You happily stated with a smile, and Sam laughed at your response.
“Whatever, just be safe tonight,” she said as her eyes looked you up and down, clearing having a distaste for your costume, “whatever the fuck you are.”
Naturally, you scoffed at her words, “I will have you know that I am one of the best historians out there.”
“Yeah, I doubt that,” Sam replied with a smile. It might not seem like much, but these small banters between the two of you were what she loved the most. She could be herself around you, and you would never judge her for it.
In the mood to be a smartass, you straightened your posture and pulled on your coat. You cleared your throat and began doing an impression of a Bolton accent, “It’s hard to believe I’m walking through the ruins of the first-ever city, because I’m not. That’s in Iraq, which is miles away, and fucking dangerous.”
Sam stared at you blankly for several seconds before she shook her head, “You’re a fucking idiot, and I cannot believe you are going as that lady.”
“Excuse me, ‘that lady’ is Philomena Cunk, who is the best damn historian on this planet,” you defended while making your way to the front door, Sam following behind you, “And my costume is certainly the best.”
Sam hummed as she opened the front door, “Yeah because it's so hard to beat,” she quickly looked at the three standing out in the hallway, “a half-assed pirate, a scarecrow, and Jack Skellington.”
“Hey now, I’m a cowboy, not a scarecrow,” Chad replied with a bit of hurt. “She doesn’t care what you are. Now come on, we have a party to go to,” Mindy sat as she threw an arm around Tara the pirate and started walking down the hallway with Chad several paces behind them.
Before you followed them, you quickly kissed Sam’s lips. “I love you,” you mumbled against them, and Sam kissed your words.
“I love you too,” she replied while pulling away. You blew her kiss as you started to catch up with the group, and Sam felt her heart flutter at the small gesture. Words could not even begin to express the love she had in her heart for you, but she hoped that one day she might be able to tell you. She wanted to tell you how her entire being ached for your touch whenever you were away, and she hated watching you leave. But she simply settled for watching you leave with her younger sister, off to have the fun that was promised when you start college.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Whenever someone tells you that college is supposed to be the time of your life, they are fucking wrong. Hours and hours of studying material that you must teach yourself because your professors are too incompetent to teach it while you still pay them thousands of dollars is not fun. There is nothing ideal about college, and you hated every single second of it, but the part you loved the most was your friends.
Of course, you had friends in high school, but none meant this much to you. You would readily lay down your life for Tara, just as you would the twins. So, that’s why for the first time since the semester started, you finally felt your shoulders loosen and stress leave your body, just for some dipshit in a mask to ruin it.
It all happened quickly, according to Chad. One minute, you were taking shots with Tara, then the next, you were on top of a random guy, beating him to a pulp. It took Chad and Mindy to pry you off the guy, yet you still fought against them, trying your hardest to get your hands on that fucker.
“I’m good, I’m good,” you slurred after Chad carried you out of the frat house, but as soon as he placed you on the floor, you tried to run back into the house. “Hey! Stop it!” He shouted, quickly grabbing you before you could make it up the front porch steps, “Sit down and breathe.” Your head was spinning, and you could barely stand, but you had to get your hands on that fucker.
Grumbling under your breath, you listened to the man and sat down on the grass as Tara came to sit by you. “What happened?” She asked while picking up your dominant hand, lightly tracing her fingers over your bloodied knuckles.
You didn’t want to worry Tara that the piece of shit man was saying false accusations about Sam; you knew it would ruin her night. So, you decided to lie. “He said that the only correct way to eat cereal is to pour the milk first, then the cereal.”
A small laugh came from Tara’s lips as she let go of your hand and pulled out her phone. “You know, I don’t know what’s worse: how crazy you defend cereal or that you nearly killed a man dressed up as Philomena Cunk.”
You chuckled beside her and sat in silence as you watched her call her sister, asking the older Carpenter to come pick you up. You felt bad for not being the one to call Sam, but you knew that if you called her, she would ask what happened, and you couldn’t lie to that sweet and kind woman. Those soft, dark eyes that smiled for her would break if you ever were to lie to her, and you couldn’t put her through that.
So, you sat in silence with the younger Carpenter as Chad and Mindy went back inside the frat house. Once they were out of earshot, Tara spoke up. “I know you lied to me.”
“About what?” You questioned, but you knew what she was talking about. “Tell me why you beat the shit out of that guy,” Tara pressed.
You shook your head and sucked in a deep breath, debating on if you should tell her or not. With a sigh, you down while speaking, “He was saying some shit about Sam, and I lost my cool. I’m sorry that I ruined your night.”
Several beats of silence passed before Tara grabbed your hand and interlaced her fingers with yours. “You know, When you and Sam first started dating, I was skeptical. You’re one of my closest friends, and Sam is my sister. But oh my god, after seeing how she looks at you, I knew that the two of you were meant to be. I’ve never seen Sam look at anyone the way she does with you and the way she smiles around you, Y/N. It's unbelievable; I’ve never seen her smile that much. What I mean to say is that Sam has a hard time with words, but that woman loves you so much. So thank you for defending her name because I know she would do the same thing for you,” Tara admitted with a soft smile, and before you could respond, the both of you saw a tall figure approaching you.
“What the hell happened?” Sam asked with worry laced in her voice as soon as she got close enough to see your hand. She crouched beside you and took your hand out of Tara’s as she lightly traced her fingers over your knuckles, more worried about you than whoever you beat the shit out of.
“Your sweet, little Y/N who would never do any harm went apeshit on someone. It took both twins to pull her off of the poor guy,” Tara said as she stood from the ground and began walking into the house.
“Hey! Where do you think you’re going?” Sam questioned while eyeing her sister, who didn’t even look behind her as she shouted, “Back to the party!”
You laughed as you watched the younger Carpenter disappear into the house, “she’s a little shit, isn’t she?” You joked as you looked back at Sam, who glared at you, “What?”
You knew it was terrible, but you couldn’t help but find Sam extremely attractive whenever she was angry; it was probably why you liked to piss her off so much.
The older girl huffed as she stood up, pulling you up with her as well. “Don’t ‘what’ me; you know exactly what I’m mad about,” she said as she grabbed one of your arms and threw it over your shoulder. You just shrugged, not wanting to argue with Sam over the reason for your fight.
“I’m not that drunk, Sam. I can walk by myself,” you declared, but once Sam let go of your arm so you could prove your point, gravity seemed to have a vendetta against you, causing you to begin swaying from side to side.
“Mhm, yeah. Come on,” Sam sighed as she grabbed your arm and threw it over her shoulder again.
Naturally, the entire walk back to the apartment, you complained about Sam not needing to carry you, but you would never admit that you enjoyed seeing this softer side of her.
“So,” Sam asked when you two got away from the frat house, “What happened?”
You shrugged as you continued walking, “The guy was saying false information about how to eat cereal properly. That’s all.”
Now, Sam wasn’t an idiot, and she wasn’t born yesterday. She knew when you were lying, and she knew that you were. In your relationship, Sam always knew that you would be truthful, and her heart began to break at the thought of things changing between the two of you. She knew it was stupid, but she couldn’t help the anxiety at the idea of you no longer being honest with her.
As if you could sense her doubt, you spoke, “Sam, you know that I love you, right?” The Carpenter nodded her head, silently ushering you to continue. “Well, then you know that I would do anything to protect you, anything at all,” you proclaimed as you leaned over and placed a loving kiss on her forehead.
Several beats of silence passed as Sam was thinking about what you said. She knew that whatever happened between you and the dickhead was about the online controversies surrounding her, even though you didn’t say anything about it; she just knew.
A part of Sam felt guilty that you had the feeling of constantly needing to defend her name, which got you in a lot of trouble. But she also loved the idea of having someone who loved and cared for her enough to start fights over her, no matter how petty they were.
So, instead of asking you any more questions, Sam simply said, “I love you too,” and pulled you closer to her.
Falling into a comfortable silence, you walked for several minutes before you stopped dead in your tracks. “What the actual fuck is that?” You asked with a slight hint of venom in your voice.
You had stopped just outside a Barnes & Noble, glaring into the store’s display case. In that case, there was a small cardboard cutout of Gale Weathers, and behind her were copies of her notorious book that worsened Sam’s public image.
“You fucking bitch,” you hissed as you unwrapped Sam’s arm from you and walked up the glass window, pushing on it but getting nowhere. “Y/N, come on. It’s closed, and you’re drunk,” Sam said as she gently grabbed your hand, but you shook it off.
Without saying a word, you walked to the side of the store to pick up a brick. Before Sam could stop you, you threw the brick through the window, causing it to shatter into tiny pieces.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Sam whisper-shouted as she tried to stop you from climbing into the store, but you were surprisingly strong in your intoxicated state. Once you entered the display area, you grabbed a signed copy of Gale’s book and ripped out several of the pages. You then began doing that to the rest of the books you could see, and once you were done, you moved to the cutout.
“You fucking bitch,” you hissed as you pushed the cutout, causing it to fall, “Yeah, that’s what I thought. Fucking fuckass loser.”
Now, she knew it was terrible to be imagining this, but Sam couldn’t find it within herself to stop you from destroying Gale’s books. Truth be told, she wanted to join you, but she felt like you deserved to have this moment to yourself.
“I’ll fuck you up, little bitch,” you stated as you picked up the cutout and put it underneath your arm. “What are you doing?” Sam asked with a small laugh as she watched you carry the cardboard Gale Weathers from the store.
“Taking her home,” you slurred once you stepped onto the street, then you began walking toward Sam’s apartment. “Wrong way, dumbass,” Sam stated once you got halfway down the sidewalk.
Without saying a word, you turned on your heels and walked back to Sam. “Thank you,” you replied while the two of you began walking back in the correct direction, still holding Gale.
“Are you taking her home to kill her?” The Latina asked while looking down at the cutout, struggling to keep a straight face with this unusual situation.
“What kind of fucking animal do you take me for? No, I'm not going to kill her!” You exclaimed, “But I am kidding her.”
The sound of Sam’s laughter caused an eruption of butterflies to flutter throughout your chest. Even though you were drunk and probably wouldn’t remember most of this night, hell, there was a good chance you wouldn’t even remember ‘kidnapping’ Gale Weathers, but you knew you would never forget the sound of your woman’s laughter.
“Come on, Y/N. Let’s get you home so you can torture Gale,” Sam joked as she wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you into her side.
She didn’t care that you would be on the news tomorrow morning for the destruction of property; she was just glad you were happy while doing it. It wasn’t every day that Sam got to witness you lose your shit, especially on an inanimate object, but she loved seeing this side of you. She wouldn’t change your relationship for anything, no matter what it was. Sam loved you with her body and soul, and she would never give that up.
The only thing she wished was different was that she knew you when she was young. She would stay up most nights wondering how different her life would have been if she had met you when she was 18, a fresh runaway from home. Before she got into all the hard drugs, she still struggled despite being three years sober. But as she listened to you threaten fake Gale while stating how much you loved the woman you were dating, Sam couldn’t be happier with you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Taglist: @elduster @silentwolfsstuff @maskthedwarf @canvascoloredin
633 notes ¡ View notes
xoxoemynn ¡ 10 months ago
Note
Good morning emy, idk if you've thought about Stede waking Ed up with sweet morning kisses today but if you haven't, this is your reminder to do that 😇❤️
In another life, Stede preferred nighttime to day. 
At night he could be alone. Well, he had to share a bed with Mary, yes, but he could feign sleep, and therefore it was easier to imagine he was alone. All nice and quiet and peaceful. No expectations to speak of. And then he could drift off to sleep as he rotated through some of his favorite fantasies in his mind — captaining a pirate ship, going on adventures on the high seas, swashbuckling in a fab red swishy coat and some smashing leather boots, oh, and maybe even a sash so it’d twirl all around him as he leapt to and fro, and…
Anyway!
Point is, Stede loved nighttime, because it was the only time he could fool himself into thinking he was happy. There was nothing he looked forward to more than putting on his nightcap and tucking himself into bed for a long night of dreaming.
But now? In this life?
Stede loves the morning.   
He loves the way the sun’s rays stream into the window of the bedroom he shares with Ed. He loves stretching out his arms and wiggling his fingers to get some circulation back into them before he pulls Ed into a tighter embrace. He loves the sleepy little noises Ed makes as he settles himself into Stede’s chest. He loves gently running his hand through Ed’s hair and seeing if any more silver strands sprouted overnight. 
He loves placing gentle kisses on whatever part of Ed he can reach — the top of his head, above his eyebrow, on his cheek, on his nose, down his neck and back up again. 
He loves how Ed feels wrapped up around him, all warm and languid and liquid, like a big, gorgeous cat sunning himself in love. But in a way that doesn’t sound weird. Because that does sound weird. A bit. 
But still. 
Stede loves mornings.
All nice and quiet and peaceful. No expectations to speak of. 
Just love.
Ed rolls over in Stede’s arms, taking one of Stede’s hands as he does. Smiling, Stede turns his focus to the new area of skin Ed very kindly bared for kisses. He peppers soft kisses all over Ed's back, gentle and sweet, each one a reminder to Ed:
Hello, my love.
I’m here.
I love this life we’ve built together.
We’ll get our first guest at the inn some day.
You’re beautiful.
You’re wonderful.
You’re mine.
And then Stede feels Ed pull his hand to his lips, and Ed presses a kiss there, and Stede squeezes his hand back.
“Morning, love.” Ed’s voice is still raspy with sleep, just one more thing Stede loves about the mornings. “Have a good night's sleep?”
“Yes,” Stede replies, and tugs Ed closer to him. “And now I can't wait to start our day.”  
149 notes ¡ View notes
jasminerva ¡ 4 days ago
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it's the thought that counts
various SakaDays dudes x gn!Reader SFW, clothing implied but never assumed Yumi (seikoo_11) sent me a very sweet message and idea! Gaku and Nagumo were all her, but I wanted to add all the other dudes on my mind because they all deserve love~! Banner img from some SAO game art thing. 🎄🎁 Happy SakaHoliDays to all~! ✨🎉
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The holidays were a time for surprises, and you had cooked up the ultimate one for your SakaDays dude.
Decked out in ribbons, you struck a playful / seductive pose and announced, "Merry Christmas! I'm your gift!"
The twist? Hidden somewhere beneath the intricate bows and wrappings was an actual present, tailored just for them. The look on their face was priceless as they realized they'd have to unwrap their "gift" piece by piece to uncover the thotful treasure you'd prepared.
What better way to celebrate than with a little fun and a lot of love?
✨ ݁ ݁⋆.ೃ🎄₊ ⊹🎁🎀 .°.✨
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Gaku: A game he'd been interested in playing (how did you even notice? he gave no tells.). He unwraps you with a mix of laziness and faux indifference. He teasingly asks if the gift came with any DLC and when you say "Yes" in that particular tone, things heat up.
Nagumo: A box of Pocky tucked just out of reach ("Hurry up~" you say, "it's gonna melt!"). Every ribbon undone feels like a playful battle, and by the end, the real gift was the fun of "unwrapping" you - plus, the promise of enjoying the real treat later.
Uzuki: An art instruction book. His cheeks flush as he delicately undoes each bow, mumbling how you're more beautiful than any masterpiece he's seen and could ever dream of illustrating. (You end up redder than he is.)
Shin: A manga volume he's missing. He hesitates, blushing furiously as he fumbles with the ribbons, only to stammer out a heartfelt thank-you after. You can't wait to spoil him some more later, so you decide against spoiling the extra surprises (let's just say it involves checking more things off his list - Shin knows cuz he can read your mind and your smug face).
Shishiba: A luxurious silk tie and tie clip to add to his collection (tell me he doesn't have one of those walk-in closets with lux items encased in glass that he rotates through). He takes his time unwrapping, quietly amused by your boldness, before thanking you with a soft smirk and puts the tie around you to see how you look (with just that on - nothing else).
Hyo: Metal/brass polish. He roars with laughter at the practicality and promises to "shine up" just for you. You tell him he's already dazzling and he glows from your compliment (+ the offer to spoon him afterwards).
Heisuke (+ Piisuke): Bird & boy-friendly snacks. His excitement is infectious, as he grins ear to ear, quickly tearing through the ribbons (somehow tangling you up further before Piisuke helps out) and hugs you like you're the best gift ever.
Natsuki: Spare lithium battery packs for his invisibility suit. He unwraps you with methodical precision, smirking as he asks if this counts as "charging up for later".
Mafuyu: A UV light wand. He's irked at first, carefully untying the ribbons, but the corners of his eyes crinkle and mask shifts slightly when he sees the thoughtful gift. Why's he using it on you--?!
Amane: A personalized activity booklet. His quiet curiosity grows as he unwraps you, and his soft smile is worth every ribbon as he eagerly flips through the pages, memorizing them all instantly. He wants to start ASAP but you remind him that things are closed for the holidays and he blushes ("no no it's okay" god he's adorable).
Kashima: A handwritten IOU on reindeer stationary for a karaoke session. He chortles when he reads it, pulling you close and saying, "I expect a duet." (This would be the perfect time to put the light up Rudolph nose on him.)
Kaji: Hi-fi earplugs and a new, festive trapper hat. He laughs softly, mumbling too quietly about how much he appreciates you and the gift. He doesn't think he could pull it off but you convince him that he'll be the talk of the town and deserves to feel special.
Apart: Instead of wrapping yourself, you take the ribbons and gently wind them around the two of you, pulling him close with a smile. "This way," you say softly, "we won't be apart this Christmas." He melts, flushes, and tightens the ribbons around your shared embrace to nuzzle against you and hide his face (can't even see anything under his messy bangs anyway).
Haruma: He holds onto one end of the ribbon and tells you to spin and unravel yourself. Not in a dominant way (kinda), but in a personal trainer way (sobbing the winter holidays is when we're allowed to potato!). No gift on you, except a signed affidavit witnessed by Uzuki (& Kashima in case it wasn't the right Uzuki) saying that you worked out earlier and deserve something sweet. (Protein-baked goodies aren't half bad tbh, but Haruma would treat you to whatever you love, even the bad macro stuff - you'll burn it off later anywho ;)
Sakamoto (platonic): You've ribbon-wrapped Sakamoto for Aoi, tying a big bow around his belly, slapping it for good measure, with a cheeky grin. "Merry Christmas to the family man!" you declare, shooing him away. You'll watch over the store during the holidays so he can spend time with Aoi and Hana-chan.
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Merry Christmas & Eve~! Depending on where you're located~ Artists of all mediums give so much to you and me~ be sure to wish your beloved creators a Happy Holidays~! Want more? Check out my SakaDays Masterlist! 🍑 Comments, reblogs, tags appeachiated~! 🍑
✨ ݁ ݁⋆.ೃ🎄₊ ⊹🎁🎀 .°.✨
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Extras under the mistletoe 🌿🍒:
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Yumi's cutieful art of Nagumo in ribbons *fans self* that I requested. Do you think he'd let you wrap him up too? Oh def yes. THANK YUMI FOR SPARKING THIS POST & GIVE HER ALL THE LOVE + FOLLOW HER ON TWITTER PLEASE AND THANK YOU~!
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Kaji's new hat. Call him cute and ask him for a ride~! ;3
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I knew I could count on Korean TWT for red-nosed Kashima art. If you see more, please do share~! [adding as I happen upon them: sakori00, No_Eul_0, yant2k]
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Also, LOOK AT HIM! PINKY ALL THE WAY UP KASHIMA!!! He prolly sings enka / operatic style. He's as refined as Shishiba but totes it loudly and proudly. (Thank you again, Yumi, for finding the extra!!!)
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Tie clip + fancy tie was brought up by Lao (@herringstrait) in passing conversation. They even found this beauty!
ÂĽ13,200 for Mr. Fancypants. I bet it's functional too. Shishiba already has a hammerhead shark pin I'm sure he'd appreciate this!
44 notes ¡ View notes
leapingbadger ¡ 25 days ago
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Withdrawal
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Summary: – Crosshair runs out of toothpicks on a mission and the rest of the Batch must feel his wrath.
Read on AO3
“Hunter, we’ve got a problem?” Tech said as he approached Hunter, sat at the communications array or the Marauder.
Hunter sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. This was not what he wanted to hear after the last mission went awry, causing delays.
“Is there something wrong with the ship?” he asked, not taking his eyes off the screen.
“No,”
“Are they fighting again? Just tell Wrecker to stop hitting him with Lula,” Hunter said as his hands prodded the keys on the console.
“No, it’s not that,” Tech said, shooting a worried glance behind him.
“Tech,” Hunter said, spinning his chair to face his brother, “I am good at many things, but mind reading isn’t one of them.”
“It’s Crosshair,” Tech whispered, “he’s on his last two toothpicks,”
Hunter stood up, shoving his brother into the cockpit, looking around for his severe brother. He lowered his voice, “how is that possible? What about the backup pack?”
“He lost it on Felicia” Tech said matter-of-factly.
“What about the one in the med kit?”
“He used it when Wrecker was piloting the Marauder.”
“Kriff it,” Hunter said under his breath. “Well, you said he had two left, right? Maybe he can make those last.”
“I suppose so, Tech said, “we’re heading home soon, correct? maybe we won’t have to worry about it.”
Hunter looked shifty, “Actually we just got new orders. We’ll be gone another few rotations.”
A loud argument sounded from the steps of the ship.
“Wrecker, you made me break my toothpick.”
“Karabast!” Tech said.
**
“All I’m saying is, if we hadn’t dropped the explosives, we would have had a cleaner exit, and I wouldn’t currently be fixing blaster holes in the side of my ship.” Tech spat.
The fire crackled in from of them, the embers drifting steadily up into the dark night sky. Hunter heard strange noises emanating from the woods and was only partially paying attention to the argument in front of him.
“If we hadn’t dropped the explosives, you wouldn’t have a ship at all,” Wrecker growled, waving his ration stick threateningly at his brother.
“That is wholly inaccurate,”
“The Kriff it is,” Crosshair said, taking his toothpick out of his mouth and prodding the air between them with it.
Hunter and Tech exchanged a glance, “It doesn’t matter how we did it. It was another win. No matter how messy. The next one will be better,” Hunter said confidently, trying to cool the tempers. He took a bit of his ration stick and gave Tech a pointed look.
“I…I will yield in this particular case,” Tech said reluctantly.
“What?” Wrecker said dumbfounded, “that’s never happened before, has it Cross?” He hugged his stern brother before beating him in the face with his favorite tooka doll.
“Dank ferric, Wrecker. You made me drop my toothpick again,”
Tech caught Hunter’s eyes and shook his head slightly. The Sergeant ran his hands over his face and took a deep breath. It was going to be a long couple of days.
Crosshair had developed a fixation on his toothpicks thanks to a particularly surly bounty hunter during training. Frustrated with his penchant for sticking his tongue out as he took a shot, he gave him a toothpick to chew on and the rest was history. Hunter couldn’t remember a time when the floor of the barracks wasn’t littered with Crosshair’s discarded wooden shards, usually flicked in a moment of anger or for emphasis.
He had run out a couple of times over the years. Once when they were still cadets, and he’d only recently started using them. The somber mood that followed still gave Wrecker the occasional nightmare.
The next time was during one of their early missions as they were stuck behind enemy lines, unable to get to his backup on the Marauder. He had done his personal best during that mission. Taking out more droids than the rest of them combined. Hunter thought if he could have stabbed each droid in the eye with a toothpick he would have.
They were only a few hours into a toothpickless Crosshair, and the strain was already starting to show. He had pulled off his right glove and was gnawing on his fingernails. His thumbnail was already down to the quick.
“We have to do something, or he won’t have any nails left,” Hunter said to Tech quietly.
“Perhaps we could distract him. A game of Sabaac or some combat training?”
Hunter was already exhausted from the mission and had no desire to enter into hand to hand combat with a cranky Crosshair. He may lose a hand.
“What if we try to teach him other things? Maybe you can show him your datapad…”
“Crosshair had shown no interest in procurement of information or the datapad itself,” Tech said
“Kriff it, Wrecker, could you breathe any louder?” Cross snapped as Wrecker looked up alarmed.
Tech sighed, adjusting his goggles and walking to the back of the ship. “Crosshair, would you be interested in learning more about my datapad. It had the most up to date…”
“No…” Crosshair said sulkily, arms crossed over his chest.
Tech turned around immediately, “I tried,” he said to Hunter, nose buried in the datapad as he sank into the pilot’s seat.
Wrecker was bench pressing Gonky in the middle of the ship.
“Hey, Wreck. Maybe see if Cross wants to join you?” Hunter said encouragingly. Wrecker’s eyes lit up.
“Hey Cross, you wanna…”
“No,” The sniper said, feet dangling off the stairs to the gunner’s mount.
**
The next few days were tedious and long. Crosshair couldn’t interact with his brother’s without snarling but refused to admit to the reason. The mission was a success, almost an afterthought. Hunter wasn’t worried about surviving the Separatists and much as surviving his brother. A cloud followed Crosshair around wherever he went, and he was desperate to share the rain with the rest of them.
The night before they were set to leave, Hunter had had enough. Wrecker had made the fire three times larger than necessary. Flamed shot high over their heads into the starry night. He again heard rumblings in the forest at the edge of the clearing, but this time wasn’t able to tune out the bickering occurring around him.
“No cheating, Wrecker,” Cross hissed at his brother.
“I wasn’t,” Wrecker cried sounding wounded.
“You were trying to look at my cards,”
“I was not, Hunter was…”
Hunter took a deep breath and stood up, "enough of this. Crosshair, cover me. I’ll be right back,”
Crosshair looked questioningly as Hunner strode towards the tree line.
“What exactly are you…” Tech started but Hunter strode right past him, unsheathing his vibrokife as he did so.
Once at the trees he examined the bark, running his gloved hands over a couple before pausing. The bark on the tree in front of him was loose and peeling away. He pulled it off carefully revealing virgin wood underneath.
Hunter carefully cut a small section of the tree with his knife before barrel rolling out of the way of an unsee assailant, knife raised.
Pew! A single shot rang out from Crosshair’s firepuncher, scaring the creature away. Hunter nodded his thanks to his brother and continued to work before finally returning to the campfire.
“Thanks Cross,” he said as he sat down.
“Are you going to tell us what you were doing?”
“In a minute,” he said, still working his knife through the wood. “Did he stick his tongue out?” Hunter asked his brothers with a smile.
Tech and Wrecker laughed as they nodded their heads.
Crosshair growled but stopped as Hunter sat up straight and passed something to him.
“What’s this?” he asked, clearly already knowing the answer.
“Toothpicks. At least, makeshift ones until we get back to Kamino,”
Crosshair glanced down at the pile of misshapen wooden shards in his hand and nodded his thanks to his brother. He picked one up, tentatively placing one between his lips.
“I’m probably going to get a splinter,” he said, with a slight smile.
“You’re welcome, Crosshair.” Hunter said.
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buckychristwrites ¡ 2 years ago
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About You | Day 12 | j.t.
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Summary: Your job? Pop culture journalist for The Independent. Your assignment? To write a profile on the cocky footballer that you're publicly feuding with.
Word Count: 3.2k
Warnings: Cussing. Enemies to lovers
A/N: Please let me know what you think! :D side note, this gif is my fave thing that Jamie does in the whole show, im obsessed.
Masterlist | About You Masterlist | Main Blog
Smack.
Smack.
Smack.
With every newspaper that loudly hit, it was met with another jump from you, despite the fact that you knew they were coming. It had been a long morning, waking up early to catch the tube into the office, so you weren’t prepared for the loud noises this soon into the day, although you now knew more were to come. You stared at the headlines, reading each of them over and over again, as if you were trying to memorise them.
Tartt Seizes Mystery Girl’s Heart
Tartt Kiss: What We Know About The Footballer’s New Woman
Victory Celebration, Sealed With A Kiss
It was clear that the only reason the room was still silent was because a response from you was expected. You really didn’t know what there was to say. Scanning the words, you smacked your lips together before speaking.
“They’re not particularly clever.”
Your boss was whatever the exact opposite of enthused was, evident by his severe stare and the fact that he hadn’t sat down for a single second since you had entered his office.
“This funny to you?” He demanded, rotating his laptop to display an article that had your name and picture featured. An article you had already seen and gone through the 5 stages of grief over. “It’s funny that they know exactly who you are and why you were there?” You shrugged, a fire burning in your chest.
“They wouldn’t have known why I was there if you hadn’t posted the announcement of the profile without checking with me first.” 
His round face was turning a bright purple, but you remained nonchalant. These meetings were so much easier for you to swallow when he made it so easy to argue. At the very least, it gave you the entertainment of seeing him so mad. This time, however, it felt different. You could feel it, and you know he did too. Leaning into his palms, which were pressed against the top of his desk, he towered over the newspapers. Despite the fact that there was still a decent amount of space between you and him, you still instinctively leaned away from him.
“What the fuck were you thinking?”
You didn’t look at him.
“I’m thinking that it was a football match, and excitement was high, and I’ve been spending a lot of time with Jamie Tartt, and maybe he wasn’t thinking very clearly.” It wasn’t entirely a lie. Although it definitely wasn’t entirely the truth, either. He began to nod as he grabbed his phone and began to type. A few seconds passed before he was sliding it across the desk to you.
“And what about that?”
Looking down, you saw the picture from Jamie’s instagram of you walking in his jersey, something you had totally forgotten about. A hot flash shot through you.
“I just borrowed some clothes. I walked to the stadium and it started raini-“ You stopped when your boss viciously waved you off.
“Don’t fucking disrespect me right now,” He said angrily, snatching his phone back. “Spotted wearing his clothes. Pictured exiting his car with him at the Charity Gala. What the fuck is the matter with you?” Your fingers were in your lap, pulling at each other. Even though you were telling the truth, there was no sense in continuing to defend yourself. His mind had been made up.
Within the hour of the match ending, you had received an email from your boss, telling you to come in for a meeting first thing in the morning. You took the tube in, which gave you plenty of time to settle your nerves. As much as you could, anyway.
Your boss began to yell about professionalism, and how you lacked it, while you thought of Jamie. No real conversation had occurred after The Kiss, as he got swept away by the team, and you found yourself being crowded by paparazzi and journalists as you tried to follow. It took two hours to go home, needing to take several detours to fend off the extra persistent ones. After that, you avoided your phone like the plague. It was blowing up with texts and calls from friends and relatives, asking if the pictures they were seeing were of you. Maybe there had been a text or two from Jamie as well, somewhere lost in the mix, but the fear of looking at your phone kept you from them. Instead, you had spent the night at home in solace, and worked on the article.
Your boss went silent for a while, pulling you from your thoughts. His fingers were white against the back of his chair, making you wonder when he moved there from the desk. Finally, he shook his head.
“I’m pulling you from the profile.”
Your spine straightened with the speed of a whip.
“You can’t do that,” You said in shock. He began to shake his head again, but you continued. “I did nothing wrong.” 
“You did everything wrong,” He spat. “You couldn’t be fucking professional. Sleeping with the fucking person you’re writing on. Disgusting. I’ll email you when I decide who will take over, and you’ll send them your notes.” The urge to cry was creeping up your throat, but you swallowed it down.
“I won’t be sending anyone shit,” You told him in a firm voice. “I’ve been working on this for almost two weeks. Do you know how hard I worked to get Jamie to trust me? After everything I’ve said in the past?” At this, he laughed. 
“Worked him real good, you did,” He said.
The comment felt like a strike to the face, and you leaned even further away from him. All you could see was red. You opened and closed your mouth a few times, his pleased smile only growing with each attempt to come up with something snarky or angry to say. A sort of acceptance washed over you as you knew what needed to be done.
“I fucking quit then.”
Now, the shock was on his face. 
“You’re quitting over Jamie fucking Tartt?” He shouted as you rose from your seat. You contemplated this answer before looking at him again, your face blank. 
“You’ve made me wish to quit over a lot less, if it makes you feel any better.” 
The yelling immediately began to commence once more, but you were already closing the door behind you. It didn’t take long for you to empty out your desk, as you really didn’t bring a lot of personal items to work, and before you knew it, you were at the train station with a box of assorted belongings and a spot in the unemployment line. 
The tube was mostly empty, just a few scattered people throughout the car. You took a spot in the back, setting the box in the space next to you while you sat against the window. As the train took off, you lost yourself in thought.
Where to go now? Over the years, you had yearned to move on from The Independent, much like Trent did, but had never bothered to try. Complacency and fear can really hold a person down. It was hard enough landing the job there, how hard would it be now to find a new one? Especially with the tainted reputation you now held? You absolutely couldn’t get any sort of reference from your old boss. Hell, he’d probably have you blacklisted from all major outlets before the day was out.
Looking at the empty seat that held your belongings, you were hit with deja vu. 
You can lay on down if ya want. Grab a few winks.
His voice echoed through your mind, bouncing off the walls of the train car. Your head fell back against the seat. Your body ached at his absence. You missed him horribly, and were angry about the things you missed out on. That you didn’t spend the day laughing with him. That there were so many things left unsaid still. That you could still feel the ghost of his lips on your own. 
You imagined him sitting next to you, and what he would say if he were there. 
Fuck ‘em. You don’t need them. You’ll be alright, love.
Your heart lurched at the thought as you came back to reality, greeted by the sad, grey box that held your belongings. You closed your eyes. It wasn’t the same. It felt like nothing would be again. 
But it had to be. Right?
Pulling out your phone, you went to call him to appease the yearning for his voice, but then froze. You didn’t want to call him. You wanted to see him.
You switched to another contact, typing and sending a message faster than your brain could process it. The response came quicker than expected, although you wouldn’t have been surprised if you hadn’t gotten one at all. A sigh fell from your lips as you stared out the window. Anxiety built in your belly, but you knew soon, it would all feel better. At least, you were hoping it would.
When you got off at your respective stop, you were determined as you rushed out. Your foot was on the first step to go up to the street when you paused. Turning, you ran to the first rubbish bin and threw the box on top. It didn’t quite fit, but you still left it. A few people gave you looks as you ran up the steps, some due to your strange behaviour, others because they recognized you from the pictures of you and Jamie in the press. You kept going.
You didn’t mean to run the whole way. But you did. Mostly due to the urgency you felt, but also partially because it was raining so hard that you felt like the streets would flood and carry you away. There was something cathartic about it. Maybe not to your heart, but to your mind. You slipped on the sidewalk a few blocks from the Underground station, almost falling straight into the cement had it not been for the lamppost next to you. It took a second to straighten up again, but once you were, you continued to run.
Within twenty minutes, you were walking down the residential street, rain continuing to pour. Your chest hurt from the running, as it wasn’t something you did with any sort of regularity. With every house you passed, you looked at the numbers on each one, searching for the one from the text. It was hard to see, with the rain and all, but you felt desperate enough, even going so far as to approach porches to properly read them.
It wasn’t the house number that alerted you to his house, however. It was his car, parked in the driveway. Your feet froze at the sight of it, remembering in vivid technicolor the rides you and him shared inside of it. The first one being under similar circumstances as you were in right now. The nerves were really building, as you stared the car and realised you were really at his house, and you wondered if you made a mistake. Wouldn’t it have made more sense to just return his calls? Instead of showing up, unannounced, in the pouring rain? 
Am I stupid? You asked yourself. Am I actually insane?
But you still found yourself approaching the door, your feet moving as if they were being magnetically pulled forward. It was nice to finally be out of the rain. You thought of the box in the bin back at the tube station. Did someone else take the belongings for themselves? Or would it end up in the landfill? Not that it mattered now. It was filled with things you’d never need again. 
You closed your eyes, thinking of the last two weeks. So much had happened. More than you ever would’ve predicted when you were given this assignment. And it all led to this moment, here, on Jamie’s porch, with you covered in rain water, heart full, and ready to share those feelings with him. After another brief moment to allow yourself to calm down, you lifted your hand and knocked one, two, three times on the door. 
As the seconds passed, you felt your heart begin to race. Is he not home? Maybe he went out with the team? Or out to the shops? You knocked again, a little faster, more urgent this time. More time ticked by, and nothing happened. Tears sprang into your eyes. Was this a sign? You checked your phone, ignoring your growing inbox as you went to Jamie’s text thread. Nothing new. Stuffing the phone back in your pocket, you gave the door another sorrow filed look. Would another knock be enough? 
No. Either he’s not home, or he doesn’t want to see you, you told yourself. It was that simple. 
You all but ran back into the rain, your head down and your spirit crushed. The walk home wasn’t a far one, although you assumed that by how many times Jamie had walked over to your place. Over the sound of the drops hitting the sidewalk, you thought you heard the sound of footsteps, but that was confirmed when you heard someone yell your name from behind.
Jamie Tartt stood before you, already soaked from the storm. He looked a mixture of pleased and confused to see you. His hair was back in the usual headband, sporting a black hoodie and joggers. 
“I was on the toilet,” He explained his delay, looking sheepish. You nodded, not caring for a single second what he had been doing. Just happy he was there now. Just you, him, the pouring rain and the bristling trees. 
“They pulled me from the profile.”
His face fell immediately, and he took a step forward. 
“Because of…?” He asked, trailing off. You nodded, causing him to pinch his chin between his fingers. “If I’d known, I wouldn’t have… I’m so sorry.” You shook your head at him, waving your hands in the same rhythm.
“Did you mean it?” You asked him. “The kiss. Did you mean to do it?”
He looked conflicted, like this was a test. Maybe he feared that you were asking in hopes that you could answer to get the article back. Or maybe he was worried that you regretted it terribly and wished that he did. 
“Yes.” It was so firm, so definitive. “I don’t regret it at all. I’d do it again. And again. And again.” You smiled widely, convinced that you’d never stop smiling again.
“I quit.” 
The curtain of rain didn’t hide the absolute shock that filled his face. You nodded.
“My boss implied that I slept with you to get you to trust me,” You explained. A beat passed and you tilted your head. “Actually, he just flat out said I slept with you to get you to trust me. So I quit. And I took all of my notes with me. So they’ll have to do everything over.” He ran a hand through his wet hair, shaking his head.
“I’m-” He stopped, his eyes squeezed shut as everything processed. “You…”
“I quit my fucking job for you,” You said, speaking loudly but slowly, so that nothing could be uncertain. You took a step forward. “I was miserable. I didn’t want to accept that, but I was.” You laughed, remembering how it felt to hate going into work. It felt like a lifetime ago, considering how happy you had been these last two weeks. “Then I got to interview you, and I remembered why I love writing and journalism in the first place. I quit my job so I can fucking kiss you whenever I fucking want to and not worry about what my boss has to say, or what people who have read my past articles about you have to say. Because I was wrong about you. I know that now.” You shrugged. “And maybe I’ll never get to write another article again, but I’ll get to kiss you, which I think is a good trade off.” 
A long time passed where he just stared at you, wide eyes and chest breathing heavy. Finally, after letting you sit in agony for a second too long, he took three quick strides towards you, pressing his hands to your cheeks and his lips were against yours once again. Your eyes closed instantly as you faded into the kiss. It was different this time, with more passion behind it, but the adrenaline that filled you was the same. You put one hand on the back of his head, curling your fingers in his hair, your other hand balling the front of his shirt in your fist. 
When he pulled away, he pressed his forehead against yours. The rain was freezing against your skin, yet you were warm.
“It’s funny,” He mumbled to you. “I learned how to behave meself in public, and now you’re out of a job. You were right.” You immediately pulled your head away from his, staring at him with a look of disbelief.
“Are you choosing this moment to make fun of my unemployment?” You demanded, as he laughed. “This exact moment? Right now, you felt it would be the time? After I just said all that nice, romantic stuff to you?”
He kissed you again, and you could feel him smiling against your lips, his body shaking in silent laughter. You wished this moment would last forever. Just kissing in the rain while smiling and laughing in between. No other problems but getting too cold. 
You broke the kiss this time, him leaning after you as if he wasn’t ready for it to end. A slight pout was on his lips, but he recovered quickly.
“How’d you get me address?”
“Got it from the highest bidder,” You said jokingly. He furrowed his eyebrows together, and you laughed. “I asked Roy.” His laugh seemed to fill the entire neighbourhood. 
“He’d give me address to all the homeless men in London if he could, so I ain’t surprised,” He admitted. You scrunched up your face.
“I don’t like being compared to the homeless men in London.” 
“No,” He said in agreement. “You’re much better.” Reaching forward, he brushed a chunk of wet hair back into place, his fingertips brushing against your forehead. His expression was tender. You were still in shock that this was happening at all.
You gave his lips another peck.
“If money were no object, what would be one thing you’d do?” He shook his head at you continuing your game.
“I’d spend the rest of me life with you.” 
You bit the inside of your cheek. 
“You don’t need any money for that.”
His eyes were staring into yours, twinkling despite the lack of light. 
“We’re gonna need money for a hospital visit if we don’t get inside,” He said, grabbing you by your damp sleeve and dragging you towards the door. It made sense. There wasn’t a single part of you that wasn’t wet, and Jamie looked about the same.
“Well, I don’t know if you knew, but I’m not gonna have money for anything coming up soon,” You told him. “So if I would have to just die at that point.” 
“Don’t worry, love,” He said as he opened the door, gesturing for you to go inside. “I won’t let anything happen to ya. Not ever.”
He shut the door behind you, and for the first time, in what felt like a long time, you didn’t need that reassurance.
You had already known he would.
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