viriv

[gammija]

the real reason tmagp is on break 'til april 11th is so sam can observe ramadan without being chased by a murderous clown blob

[wormieapple]

please understand that i will never and can never condone John Winchester’s actions but some of y’all really don’t understand what “he did the best he could” means.

he neglected and at the very least emotionally abused his kids, and there’s a pretty good argument that he might’ve physically abused them as well. he isolated them, prevented them from forming any lasting relationships outside of immediate family, left them alone for days if not weeks on end with firearms and very little food. And that’s not even the half of it. and everything he did was a manifestation of grief and drive to protect his family. which does not in the slightest justify how he treated sam and dean, but it does lay out his morals and motives pretty clearly.

He loves his kids, he really does. and while struggling to deal with his own trauma he was doing everything he could in his mind to keep them safe. but that doesn’t make his best enough, not by a long shot. that doesn’t even make his best efforts good efforts. at the end of the day he abused his kids and royally fucked up their ability to cope with their own grief and trauma in ways that i cannot touch with a 10ft pole rn or i’ll be writing 57 essays right here and now.

and again i hate john just as much as the next person but he did not set out to abuse his kids. he didn’t have nefarious intentions when it came to how he raised his kids. he was a good person who turned into an abusive asshole due to grief, paranoia, and alcoholism. and it makes perfect sense that sam and dean still love him even if they recognize the damage he did to them. because they also know how hard their dad tried, and they’ve said as much several times. and i get it cause that’s how i grew up. my dad did everything he could despite his grief, despite his depression, despite working 14 hour days in poverty and homelessness, and he still neglected and emotionally abused me. not because he was a bad person, but because he had no tools to deal with everything he was going through. and his best wasn’t enough, his best failed me. and i still love my dad cause not every memory was bad, and he does truly love me and my siblings. And i’m lucky in a way that sam and dean never were because my dad recognized where he failed us, owned up to what he did and tries everyday to repair the damage he did.

I have closure, and that’s something sam and dean could never really have. but they do have the clusterfuck of emotions that is he tried his best and it wasn’t enough.

[shazzbaa]

"Welcome to a small, velvet lined box, delicious friend!"

SO UH………………………….. SAMUEL GOT, BURIED ALIVE, IN FALLEN LONDON………….. what a horrifying delight. a little treat just for me. OBVIOUSLY I HAD TO DRAW THIS

(rambling about Fallen London ambitions under the cut)

SO YEAH THIS HAPPENED DURING MY AMBITION -- I ended up finally picking Light Fingers, the "steal a huge diamond" ambition, DESPITE SAM'S ABSOLUTE WORST STATS BEING SHADOWY AND PERSUASIVE LMAO. I was waffling on choosing for a while, until a friend found one-sentence summaries of each ambition's tone that described Light Fingers as the one that turns into horror, which like…. I can't resist flinging sam into a horror story…… and it's surprisingly easy to make the ambition pretty canon for him, tbh -- "Someone you knew sent word that they knew how to get rich in the Neath, and you followed them, but now that you're out of prison they're nowhere to be found." While stealing giant jewels isn't Samuel's passion or anything, his main reason for coming to London was to escape a life in the church that he saw confining him more and more, and thinking he had a friend with a plan down here might've made it seem less like an impulsive nonsense idea. It works better than I expected!!

Anyway IF YOU FAIL ENOUGH TIMES ON ONE PART OF THE AMBITION you can get caught and THIS HAPPENS??????? ITS THE BEST!!!!!! One of the guys involved in the horrors does threaten to bury you alive if you keep sticking your nose into his business (since just murdering you isn't as effective in a world where death doesn't stick), buT WHAT A HORRIFYING SURPRISE TO HAVE IT ACTUALLY HAPPEN!!!! They give you a bunch of options and it's all stuff like "SCREAM" and "SCRABBLE AT THE LID," all of which Samuel attempted to no avail. i love this game so much,

[minamill]

Grandmas <3

[dutchmancallypso]

Goodbye Samyoh 💜 We got the red bridge kiss at last!

[winchestergifs]

STACKEDNATURAL ⇉ 74/327

15.14 Last Holiday Written by Jeremy Adams Directed by Eduardo Sanchez Original Air Date: October 8, 2020

[s0fter-sin]

sometimes i think about how much of a waste it was to just have cas ignoring sam’s prayers in s6 instead of him actually not being able to hear him bc he was soulless and his prayers didn’t work

[milfcodeddean]

on my stanford era dean with a baby soapbox.  especially either emma happens early or john saddles him with a baby half-sibling.  either way, Dad only calls him about hunts and doesn’t pick up often and the passenger seat of the Impala is achingly empty, but the baby needs him even if Sam doesn’t anymore, so Dean keeps going 

[catsaurofmagiccomedy]

Missing my podcast guys o'clock!

[ssantisheep]

I think i am genuinely terrified that somehow sam wont Come back this campaign. Like they feel so close to the end. I really think they might finish bells hells story with Robbie and not Sam

[brainfilehasstoppedworking]

He misses his hubby guys

[aliusfrater]

didn't talk about 6.02 a whole lot in my post about souless!sam's car but i just rewatched some of it and it's making me insane. so. dean's usage of sam's car can also be connected to the narrative's synonymy of masculinity and hunting. if to not hunt is narratively portrayed as a divergence from masculinity then the motherly role dean takes on when taking care of the shapeshifter baby sam had picked up on his hunt is evident of his diverging role from a patriarch within his and sam's relationship, which is inherently identifiable with hunting, and is both connected to, as well as facilities sam's own diversion from his non-role within the structure. when sam's new relationship with hunting, which narratively changes his perceivable masculinity, is considered along with dean's presently more liminal relationship with hunting, the push and pull factors relating to their comparative differences in masculinity is what facilitates the patriarchal structural shift within this episode. and this does ultimately become evidence for sam's soullessness (less so for dean and more so for the audience) and is encapsulated within the metaphorical representation of sam having his own car.

dean's liminality as represented by his conflict about beginning to hunt again is also a super important topic to me because it's something that had been previously represented in sam only. it's a large part of my interpretation of sam within this allegorical patriarchal structure and is, i think, largely responsible for his non-role as narratively portrayed within his more nuanced masculinity—a large part of this nuance being both the dynamics of sam and dean's codependency as well as sam's more personal push-and-pull relationship with hunting. it's very crucial to note that this aspect of sam's relationship with hunting and its implications originates from the apprehension to hunting that's presented within his very first episode after his period of clarity from everything that hunting represents—the cycle of abuse, sam and dean's codependency, familial rot—while at college and while in a relationship with jessica. the same is mirrored within dean's year off hunting within suburbia; this is his version of sam's time at stanford and there are even explicit rejections of the cycle of abuse ("[...] but my dad was exactly like this. all the time. it's scaring the hell out of me.") that thematically mirrors sam's rejection of these parts of what hunting represents with his independence. sam's own helping along in getting dean to realise how his actions in trying to keep his family safe are simply facilitating said cycles also point to sam's contextually soulless rejection of his and dean's codependency; he stresses the inherent inability to keep the family dean has while hunting or having the mental state of one with the overarching episodic connotation that dean cannot remain within this liminality, that he has to choose between suburbia and hunting:

it's also important to note that, in the end, it's lisa that pushes dean back into the life, just as it was jessica's death that had thrown sam back into hunting.

[marypsue]

I don't, unfortunately, have any kind of a story to hang it on yet (she says, furiously sawing and hammering away at some trope-by-fours), but I would really love to write something where Sam and the boys, especially David, are forced into interacting for an extended period of time (and for Contrived Plot Reasons nobody can kill anybody else). I just think. It would be funny.

[awesamforehead]

wolfboypunzo -> awesamforehead

(im really bad at urls ^^' Needed something to not tie me to p.unz directly anymore)

[bunnihearted]

i miss friends nd inside jokes. everytime i rewatched game of thrones telltale theres this moment where one of the characters says smth abt potatoes nd then u can choose "u fuck potatoes?!" as a dialogue option, nd i always sent that to my friend on snapchat nd we laughed abt it every single time. now i always feel empty nd hollow bc i wanna share it w her but we havent talked in 9yrs.

[faewaren]

Almost no one who follows me is gonna know what this is about so ignore me but. Just. God I hope Marcel is okay. Still hurts.